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itsallyscorner · 3 years

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Thank you for the request, love!🎄❤️ Hope you don’t mind, I did some changes but it still follows the concept of your request! I hope you like it and happy reading!!❤️ @palna

💌.

The One I’ve Been Missing

This was kinda inspired by Little Mix’s song, “One I’ve Been Missing”, give it a listen :)

Warnings: some angst? Kinda sad for a Christmas fix..but has a some what happy ending. This came out longer than expected..enjoy, I tired:)

(Gif from Pinterest)

The living room was full of smiles and laughter as your family began to create plans for Christmas Day. It was Christmas Eve, and knowing your family, everything was to come together last minute. Though your family didn’t live too far, they had been staying at your place since the weather at your hometown had been absolutely horrible. There had been snow storms that closed down schools, took out power lines, and covered the ground in a thick white blanket of snow.

Your cousins have been arguing about who was going to make the Mac and Cheese this year when your phone began to vibrate in your pocket. You took your phone out and saw that it was Paddy. Paddy was Tom’s younger brother. Even though you and Tom had broken up, your relationship with his family was still strong. You and his brothers had gotten along so well, that they loved you like you were their sister. His parents, Nikki and Dom, have been very supportive of you during the breakup. They were disappointed in Tom for what he did and even apologized for their son’s actions. Though your relationship with their son was undecided at the moment, they always made an effort to call you on holidays or to just say hello once in a while.

You quietly excused yourself and entered the kitchen. Answering the call, you lean on the marble counters of your kitchen. The call goes through and Paddy’s adorable face pops up on your screen. His smile grows into his rosy cheeks when he finally sees you.

“(Y/n)! Merry Christmas!” He happily screams through the phone. You hear Nikki scold him in the background.

“(Y/n), darling! Merry Christmas!” She smiles while waving at the camera.

“Thank you! You guys look like you’re having a blast over there!” You hear a ton of commotion in the background, which was most likely Tom and his siblings showing off their presents to each other or having some pointless argument.

“We are! Sam’s cooked our lunch and he’s planning on making dinner later today! We’ve already opened presents and everyone’s happy! How are you, love? Are you with your family?” She questioned you as she sat on the couch. You saw Dom beside her, who made a funny face and waved at you. You chuckled waving back.

“I’m doing really good, my family has been staying with me for the last few days, so we’ve been together for about a week now? But everything’s going great! It’s Christmas Eve here and now we’re just waiting till midnight to start passing out presents!” You answer.

“Oh that’s good! I’m glad you got to spend time with your family because I’ve heard the weather there has been harsh! Thankfully Harry made it out before that big storm, if he didn’t he wouldn’t be home for the holidays!” Harry had been in your hometown because Tom was filming a new movie there. The set was only an hour away from where you lived, but you never went to visit. Although, you and Harry would meet up sometimes to have lunch together in the city, Harrison would tag along once in a while as well.

“Harry made it home! That’s good news, I was worrying that they wouldn’t make it back on time for Christmas!” You hear someone talk in the background.

“Is that (y/n)?” A deep voice asks. You recognize it to be Harry’s. Nikki nods and motions at him to say hello. Sam and Harry’s heads pop onto the screen with silly grins.

“(Y/n)! Merry Christmas! You look beautiful!” Sam compliments you with a charming smile.

“Aw thank you Sam! You look handsome!” A light blush forms on the boy’s cheeks. Harry takes the phone and asks, “How’s the weather there? Has the storm died down?”

You glanced out the window and saw nothing but white. The storm had stopped yesterday, but there were some random snowfall here and there.

“Well it’s stopped for now, my backyard is literally nothing but white.” You chuckle as you turn your camera to show your spacious backyard.

“Oh! Isn’t that wonderful, we haven’t gotten much snow here this year.” You hear Dom comment. You turn the camera back to yourself and ask Harry, “How was the flight, Haz? Hope it wasn’t too bumpy.”

Harry hummed, “The plane departed when the storm died down so it was a decent flight. There was some turbulence when we got up in the air but it went by smoothly after.”

“At least you got home safe, that’s all that matters.”

“I’m quite surprised I handled the turbulence well on my own. I was getting anxious when the plane started to shake, but towards the end of the flight it was all good.” Your brows furrowed. It was a known fact that Harry wasn’t that good with turbulence (I made that fact up, he’s probably ok w/ turbulence idk). Since he usually traveled with Tom, he had to board many flights. Tom would be the one to calm his brother down when his anxiousness got the best of him. Which made you concerned because you knew Tom wouldn’t let his younger brother board a plane on his own while a snow storm was happening outside.

“Wait Harry, you were by yourself?” You began to question him. Harry was a grown adult, he’s 21, but it still concerned you.

“Yeah, Tom had to stay back since he had to film more scenes.” Harry answered.

“Oh. Did he at least make it back home before the storm?” You continued. A frown was on the boys lips.

“Nope, he got stuck in (your hometown). I was supposed to still be there with him, but he literally forced me to get on a flight home before Christmas.” Harry shrugged. A pout formed on your own lips at the thought of Tom getting stranded in (your hometown). Also the fact that he was probably alone during the holidays. Sure, you and him weren’t on the best terms, but it was Christmas. No one should be alone on Christmas.

You continued to talk to the Holland family for a few more minutes until they told you they had to go. You bid them all goodbye with kisses and a wave before hanging up. When the call ended, the smile on your face fell. You should’ve been happy. You were spending time with your family and it was Christmas Eve! But some things never change. As always, Tom had crept his way into your thoughts.

The breakup between you two was rough and messy. Though you should have seen it coming. There was a lack of communication on both sides of the relationship. You weren’t being honest with your feelings with him and neither was he. Of course, you understood his job. You knew he would have to travel long distances and be in a different time zone as you, he had to be gone for months, and had to work with some of the most beautiful actresses in the business. But there was something about this certain costar that didn’t sit right with you. You trusted Tom and knew that he would never cheat. You just didn’t trust her. You really tried to like her, even had some conversations with her when you went to visit Tom on set. But the way she would touch his arm whenever she would laugh or look at him the same way you would just made your blood boil. Maybe it was the green eyed monster in you that caused all these emotions, you just couldn’t help it. The green eyed monster had taken over you.

For months while Tom worked on that movie, you had been feeling your lowest. You were insecure about yourself and began to second guess things that occurred in your relationship with Tom. Which was not healthy, but it happens, you know? You hated the way you looked and how your body was shaped. You compared yourself to her even though you knew most of the pictures on her Instagram were very much edited. The more Tom got busy, the less he texted or called. Your relationship felt like it was drifting but you still made an effort. You would text him to ask about his day or to just say a simple “good morning” or “good night”. He never got the chance to reply most of the time, but when he did it would be a short response. It wasn’t like the paragraphs of him going on and on about his day and how great it was. Sometimes he would talk about getting a stunt correctly done in one take or how he would get his lines right the first time. You didn’t think much of the short replies, you usually chalked it up to him just being busy. But then you would see him on Harry or Harrison’s story at some restaurant gathered all together. Then she would also be there, nuzzled up against his side while his arm rested behind her chair. That should’ve been you.

You didn’t want to think that he was cheating on you, but the signs were literally there. You shouldn’t have fallen for them and should have talked it out with Tom instead of focusing on the scenarios that were created in your head. You knew Tom was smarter than that. He wouldn’t cheat on you, he promised you that he wouldn’t break your heart. Then those pictures from the club came out.

They were all over Instagram and Twitter. You had multiple fans tagging you on them and saw them everywhere on your feed. It was as if the world was trying to shove it into your face. The picture was taken at a club, it was the usual group of boys accompanied by some cast members from the movies. You assumed there had been some drinks involved, but Tom looked sober as ever. There were many pictures of them. There were some of them laughing, dancing, and drinking together. You spotted his arm wrapped around her waist or his hand touching her in almost all of them. Finally, there were the pictures of them practically sucking the lips off of each other’s faces. They disgusted you. The way his hands were combed through her hair or how they stroked her cheek reminded you of how he kissed you. You remember feeling sick to your stomach. The pain and the anger blended together as the tears blinded your eyes. It was like a bad dream that you couldn’t wake up from.

You realized you had been staring at your phone for the past 10 to 15 minutes. Tears welled up in your eyes as your memory began to remind you of the scar that Tom had left on your life. You felt the presence of the emptiness in your heart that you thought had healed months ago. You still love him. No matter the bullshit you went through with him, you’ve never loved anyone like Tom. The one you’ve been missing was the only thing that could fix the hollowness in your heart.

“You should invite him.” You jump as your mother makes herself present in the room. You place a hand onto your heart to calm its rapid beating.

“Geez, don’t do that.” You run a hand through your hair as you lean on the counter again. Your arms touch the cold marble, bringing some coolness into your warm body.

“You’ve been gone for about thirty minutes, it’s past twelve. Everyone was worrying about you.” You mother settled herself beside you, instead her back was leaning against the marble.

“You still love him.” She tells you quietly. You’re quick to react and stand up straight, “No I— ow my tongue!”

You whine as your teeth bite down on your tongue, your actions acting before your words.

“I don’t.”

“Really? If you didn’t love him anymore, you wouldn’t be talking to his family still or meeting up with his brothers during the weekend” you mother tilted her head at you, her arms crossed.

You shrugged, “They’re nice people.”

“You know, you should stop avoiding the truth. Denying your feelings and lying to yourself is only going to hurt you even more. I’m your mother, I hate seeing you hurt.” You turned to your mom.

“Don’t you hate him?” You asked her, voice quiet.

Your mother had a look of thought on her face, “Of course, I do, he broke your heart. But I don’t know, there’s just something about that boy.”

She snapped her fingers, “Ah! He reminds me of your dad!”

You raise a brow at her, “Tom reminds you of dad?”

“He does. I remember when we were younger, your dad made the same mistakes. I hated his guts but we crossed paths again somewhere down the road and I gave him a second chance. Now how many years later, we’re married with beautiful children and grandchildren.”

You remain silent as you stare at your phone again. You thought about asking Harry for Tom’s address but you were hesitant.

“He’s probably stuck here for a reason, (y/n).” Your mom says with a knowing look. You sigh rubbing the tiredness out your eyes. It had been a long day and you were low on energy.

“He could also be thinking about you right now.” She hummed, starting to make her way out the kitchen.

“How would you know?” You ask her.

“You bit your tongue.” She simply answers before turning the corner. You were alone in the kitchen staring at your phone once again. The debate in your head continuing throughout the night.

~The Next Day~

Your gloved hands gripped onto the steering wheel as you drove through the snowy roads. You were mindful to keep an eye out for any glossy patches to avoid getting into an accident. You turned on the street Harry sent you and peered out your window to look for the number of Tom’s rented house. Harry texted you that the house was a light gray color with black accents and had a 35 nailed to the door. When you spotted the house that matched Harry’s description, you pulled over and put the car in park. You hopped out the car, shivering when the brisk winter air came into contact with your face. Your boots sink into the snow as you trudge your way up to his door.

You get to his doorstep and began to stomp the snow off your boots. Taking a deep breath you brace yourself before you can ring his doorbell.

“It’s Christmas, he shouldn’t be alone on Christmas, this is why you’re doing this.” You mumble to yourself. You started to shake but you weren’t sure if it were your nerves or the cold. It was probably both.

You finger hovered over the doorbell for a moment before you forced yourself to push it. A string of “fucks” began to play over and over in your head like a mantra.

You waited for a few seconds for him to answer but heard nothing. You debated on ringing the bell again but your feet were already turning you away from the door, too scared to face Tom again. You were about to step off his doorstep when you heard footsteps behind the door. The lock clicked and the door opened to reveal Tom, looking disheveled as ever.

His eyes widen when he realizes it was you who rang his bell. His mouth is agape as he tries to form words. The only thing he could muster out is, “(y/n).”

“Hey.” You breath out, taking him in after avoiding him for months straight. You slowly approach him, settling to stand a few feet away from him. His hair had grown out a bit longer and there was a shadow of some facial hair on his face. You noticed that his eyes were a bit dark, almost blank. It was as if the light in his eyes had disappeared.

“What—What are you doing here?” He began to ask. He rushes to add, “Not that I don’t want you here, I’m actually really glad you’re here, but—um. I’m just— hi.” He sighs, shoulders slumping. He eyes you for a second before jumping on his feet.

“How rude of me, do you want to come in? It’s freezing out here.” He moves to the side and opens the door wider so you can walk in. You didn’t want to enter his place but the warmth of the house and the familiar scent of Tom entranced your senses.

You wiped your boots on the doormat and quietly thanked him as you walked into his rented home. You noticed that Love Actually had been playing on the tv while the couch was occupied with a bowl of popcorn and an abandoned Sherpa blanket. You loosen the scarf around your neck and turn to Tom who was already looking at you.

“So, what brings you around? Thought you didn’t want to talk to me ever since what happened.” His voice is strained as he leans against the doorway to the living room.

“Paddy called me on FaceTime yesterday.” You started. Tom sighed, shaking his head at his younger brother. You wave him off, “Don’t worry, I didn’t mind. He actually helped me avoid a family argument about Mac and Cheese.”

Tom was looking down at the floor but you saw his cheeks slightly raise, “Yeah, you never did mind Padd’s eagerness.”

“Well, he’s adorable. Anyway, I ended up talking to Harry and he said that you got stuck here during the blizzard. Also, that you were spending the holidays alone.” You began to explain rocking on the balls of your feet. You turn to his tv, the voices from it murmuring quietly, “So, if you’re done watching Love Actually for the hundredth time, um, you could come over at my place and spend Christmas with my family.”

Tom pushes off the wall and slowly shuffled towards you. His arms are crossed, something he did when he felt nervous or awkward.

“I wouldn’t want to impose, (y/n).” He finally looks up at you, his familiar brown eyes that you missed so much sending comfort into your body.

“Mom insisted.” A hint of a teasing smile played on your chapstick covered lips. No matter the situation between you and Tom, you knew he could never turn down your mother. He adored your mother, he always remembered the time when you first introduced him to her. She welcomed him with open arms and treated him like he were her fifth child.

He lets out a laugh, looking down at himself, “Guess that means I should clean up then?”

He was wearing a grey jumper with black sweatpants. A blue beanie was on his head, the ends of his curls peaking out, and his feet were covered in socks to keep him warm.

“Yeah.” You breathed out, relieved that he agreed to come and you didn’t embarrass yourself.

Tom begins to dust off the couch and moves the popcorn bowl to the coffee table. He sloppily folds the blanket and fluffs the pillows.

“I might take a while, so why don’t you get comfy?” He suggests.

“Sounds good.” You hum and unwrap the scarf from your neck. Tom is by your side at an instant and takes it from your hand. He motions at your jacket causing you to unzip it. He shuffles behind you to help you remove your arms from the sleeves. You turn around to thank him while moving your hair to rest on one side of your shoulder. You catch him staring at you once again.

“What?”

“You just look really beautiful.” He immediately answers. You’re about to respond but Tom begins to talk again, “I—I know I have no place in telling you that, but you just are.”

“Thanks, Tom.” You quietly say. He nods and moves to hang your things on the coat rack. He’s about to head up the stairs but he turns around to look at you again.

“Can we talk after?” His tone is soft, as if he were afraid of breaking the peacefulness between the two of you.

“Yeah. Yeah, we can talk.”

~⏰~

You wait in the living room for Tom to get himself ready. You try to watch the movie but all you can think about was what Tom and you could possibly talk about. You knew it would be about the breakup, but what else was there to discuss?

You heard Tom make his way down the stairs. Your eyes avert themselves to where Tom was coming from. He wore a dress shirt that had white and cream colored stripes going down it, pairing the shirt with dark jeans and dress shoes. His outfit wasn’t too fancy nor casual, it was perfect for Christmas Day with your family.

The smell of his cologne lingered it’s way to your nose. You recognized the smell even months after not seeing Tom. It was the cologne you had gotten him for his birthday. He fell in love with it the moment you gave it to him and had been wearing it ever since. You honestly thought he would switch it up after the breakup, but according to your nose, he hasn’t.

Tom presents himself to you, standing a few feet away from where you were sitting. “How is this? Too much?”

“You’re good, it’s spot on.” You reassure him. Tom hums in approval before settling himself beside you.

This was it. You guys were finally going to talk.

Tom rubs his hands together, resting his elbows on his knees. He looks at you over his shoulder, “It’s been a while since we’ve seen each other, hasn’t it?”

“Or talked.” You add with a slight shrug. An awkward silence placed itself upon you two.

Tom was the first to speak, “I was a dick. I still am, but I was a dick back then for all the shit I put you through.”

You hesitate to answer but end up agreeing, “You were a dick. But we were both responsible for what happened.”

Tom shook his head, “No, don’t try to make me feel better. I know what I did was stupid and I should have been honest with you from the start. This was all my fault. I was a horrible boyfriend, everyone made me see that. Including my parents.”

Tom turns his body to face you, “I thought not telling you this would hurt you and I less, but it only made it a hundred times worse.” Your brows bunch together.

“What do you mean?”

“I know when we broke up I said a bunch of bullshit, but I just want to explain myself, please?” His eyes are pleading, almost glossy. You motion for him to continue.

“The thing that happened between me and her was all the studio’s plan. Though I’m not going to lie and say it was all their fault, because I also played a part in it. But that was how it started. They wanted us to put on a show and lead the fans on so it could be used as promo for the movie.” He admitted. Your mouth gapes at his confession. He was probably telling the truth, but it could’ve also been a front.

“And you’re telling me this now? What, did it take you eight months to come up with an excuse for cheating?” You angrily said. “And even if it was for promo, it’s still cheating, Tom! You knew you had a girlfriend when you agreed to go along with their stupid plan!”

Tom sighed frustratedly, rubbing his palms against his face, “I know, I know it sounds made up but I swear to you, (y/n) I’m telling you the truth!”

“Then why didn’t you tell me about it from the start? Did you really think lying was better than telling me the truth? I thought we were supposed to be honest with each other, you literally broke so many promises, Tom!” You stood up, the anger fuming in you growing too much for your body.

Tom stood up as well, “I only lied to you to protect you! I thought it would be better if you thought we were drifting apart than telling you I had to be publicly seen with a girl that’s not you! By the way, I wasn’t the only one who was being dishonest, so were you!”

“No, don’t turn this around on me! I wouldn’t have to had lie about my feelings if you would’ve told me the truth! This was all your fault Tom, you’re the one who agreed to some stupid pr stunt.” Your finger jabbed itself into his chest as you told him off about his doings.

Tom took your jabs as he shamefully looked down at his feet. “You don’t think I know that?”

“I know this was my fault, (y/n).” His tearful eyes lock onto yours. His jaw clenched as he tried to stop his tears from falling.

Your hand comes back to rest at your side, “If you knew it would break us up, then why did you agree to it, Tom?”

“Because it was either actually breaking up with you or agreeing to some stunt that’ll make me seem like some Hollywood hotshot who gets all the women.” He confessed. To Tom, it felt like a weight had been taken off his shoulders. But to you it felt the opposite. All the new information seemed as if it were piling up on you, making you overwhelmed.

“If I chose neither of them, I would’ve been fired from the film and they were planning on blackmailing me, so I chose the second option. I know it wasn’t the best decision, seeing how we are now. But it was the only choice where I would still be with you.” He explains leaning forward to her closer to you. Your arms crossed to form some kind of protection for yourself.

You had just realized that Tom forced himself into a stunt just so he can still be with you. It wasn’t the best option, but he chose the option where the two of you could still be together. You sighed not knowing how to react, it all just seemed like too much.

“I—Tom you can’t just tell me all of this and expect everything to be okay between us.” You run your hand through your hair. Your eyes watering from the frustration.

“I understand why you would keep it from me, but why did you wait so long? You could’ve said that eight months ago and I probably wouldn’t have hated you as much as I do now.” Your nails dig into your skin.

Tom looks up at you, “You hate me?” He croaks out.

Your head tilts at him, “Why wouldn’t I hate you? I hate you—I’m supposed to hate you but I just can’t and I don’t know why. You’re just, you’re you and no matter how many times I try to hate you I just can’t.”

Tom shifts closer, his frame now towering over you. His fingers slightly brush against yours, causing a rush of electricity to shoot through your body.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry for everything, I know I should have been honest and told you the truth. I know what I did wrong and I’m sorry.” He gently cups your face to look up at him. You missed the feel of his hands against your skin and couldn’t hold yourself back from nuzzling against his warm palms.

“I still love you so much, (y/n). I never stopped. I just—is it too late for a second chance? I know it’s not going to be the same as when we were together but I’m willing to try again. I promise I will try harder and I’ll be honest, I’ll do everything for you to be mine again. All I want is just another chance.” His thumbs brush against your cheeks. Your hands come up to grip onto his wrists.

“Tom, I don’t know.”

“Please (y/n), it’s been so hard without you. Please I just need you again. I miss you so much, everything’s been going wrong ever since you left and I feel empty. I’m not complete without you.” His voice cracks as he begs for you to give him a chance. You stare at him for a moment and your mother’s voice echos in your head.

“He’s probably stuck here for a reason, (y/n).”

Maybe your mother had a point. Things happen for a reason and maybe this was one of this moments.

Your thumbs stroke the skin of his wrist, “Fine, I’ll give you another chance Tom.”

A look of relief is on his face as he wraps his arms around you and pulls you flush against his chest. You feel his heart beating rapidly against your chest as he shoves his face into your neck.

“Thank you.” He mutters against your skin multiple times. “I promise I won’t screw it up, I’m serious.” He pulls away to make sure you’re looking into his eyes.

“I’m trusting you to keep that promise. You’re only getting one chance, Tom.” You warn him. Tom nods eagerly.

“I know, I know, I’m not going to mess this up I swear. I’m going to prove that you could trust me again, I’ll do anything.”

You smile before pressing a light kiss on his cheek, “Ok, if you’ll do anything, then we better get going. Mom’s probably wondering what’s the hold up.”

“Right. Yeah, um before we go. If you want to talk more about what happened before or have any questions, you could ask me anytime. I just dumped all of this on you unexpectedly and it probably feels like a lot.” He offers.

“Yeah, I’d like that.”

~⏰~

You and Tom arrived at your house to Christmas music blaring from the tv’s speakers and the happy chatter of your family. Your mom spots Tom at the doorway and her face lights up.

“Tom, you came!” She climbs her way through the mass amounts of wrapping paper and your niece and nephews. Tom meets her halfway and helps her remove the wrapping paper that had stuck onto her pants. She pulls him into a hug, which Tom returns immediately.

“Thank you for inviting me.” He smiles as your mom pats his cheek fondly. She waves him off, “Please honey, no one should be alone for Christmas.”

They continue to talk as your mother leads him into the living room. You see him greeting your siblings and cousins, a shy smile on his face as he shakes their hands. You couldn’t help but stare at him as he interacted with your family. It made you feel whole and warm inside, as if the emptiness in your heart was finally recovering.

You were taking off your boots when a shadow fell upon you. You look up to see Tom standing above you. “Need help?”

“No, I almost had it, the knot’s too small for my nails to undo it.” You mutter as your fingers continue to fumble with the knot. Tom kneels in front of you and gently removes your fingers from your boot.

“Let me do it, I know how fussy you get when you mess up your nails.” You smile fondly at him. The fact that he remembered how you hated messing up your nails after getting them done made the butterflies in your stomach erupt.

He gets the knot undone successfully and pulls off your boot. He holds a hand out for you and you take it. You stand up and thank him before glancing at your clothes.

“I’m gonna go upstairs and clean myself up for lunch. I’ll be back.” You place a hand on his shoulder before turning to go up the stairs. You feel his hand grip onto yours, pulling you back.

“I’ll save you a seat beside me?”

You squeeze his hand, “Yeah, I appreciate it.”

He watches you head up the stairs till the moment you turn the corner. He couldn’t believe you were back in his life. You haven’t changed at all in the months you’ve been apart. You were still beautiful and radiant as ever. He was so thankful for whatever gods that allowed him to have a second chance with you. You were all he wanted and he wasn’t going to screw it up like last time.

Your mother had called for everyone to sit at the table and you still weren’t there. Thirty or more minutes had passed since you went upstairs and so far he’s been catching up with your siblings and cousins. He’s also been dragged into playing “race cars” with your nephews and “princesses” with your only niece. Everyone had slowly shuffled into your dinning room but you were still missing. Tom even hung back in the living room for a while to see if you would catch up.

You mother spotted Tom looking back at the stairs as he decided to join your family in the dining room. She approached him and turned him towards the stairs, “Why don’t you go and check on her, tell her lunch is ready.”

Tom nods and climbs up the stairs. He’s been to your home multiple times while you two were together so he wasn’t lost. He found your door and knocked on it.

“I’ll be down in a sec!” He hears you yell from behind the door.

“Your mom said to call you down for lunch and see what’s been taking you so long.” Tom leans against the wall as he wait for you to open the door. The lock clicks and you pull it open. Your hair was in loose curls and there was some light makeup on your face. You weren’t in the jeans and sweater you were in earlier, now you were dressed in a white sweater and grey knee high boots.

“Hey.” He greets you. “You ready?”

“Yeah, I think I am.” You close the door behind yourself and stand across from Tom. He notices a shimmer around your neck. The silver chain with a circle charm hanging from it caught his eyes.

“You still have that?” He points out stepping closer to you. You glance at the necklace, “Of course I do. You gave it to me for my birthday.” Your fingers envelope around the charm, fiddling with it.

“You look stunning.” He says.

“Thanks.” The two of you stand there for a moment before Tom’s stomach grumbled.

“I think we should get going.” You laughed as you hooked your hand with his.

The two of you sat side by side at the table. He was a gentleman as always. He pulled your seat out for you and pushed it in once you were settled. He helped passed the dishes to you and even insisted on placing the food onto your plate. Lunch had gone smoothly, it was only filled with laughs, some catching up, and the stories your parents would tell at the table every year.

Your parents were in the middle of retelling their first Christmas together with your older brother, their first born. Your parents were reminiscing about the pearl ring your father gave her and how much it meant to her. You were listening to your parents when you felt a hand grip onto yours under the table. You glance down to see Tom had placed his hand above yours. His large hand enveloping your smaller ones.

“You alright?” You lean closer to him so only he can hear you. Tom squeezes your hand as a small smile forms on his lips.

“Yeah, I’m just glad to be here. Thank you.” He whispers. Your other hand covers his, your thumb stroking the top of his hand.

“So am I.” For the first time in those months apart, you finally felt like everything was complete again. Sure, you two had many things to work out and discuss. But right now, all you can think about was the man sat beside you. You weren’t missing him anymore, he was right there beside you. He was actually with you. All you wanted for Christmas was the one you’ve been missing and after eight long months of pain and longing, your wish finally came true.

#marvel #mcu #avengers #Tom Holland #Tom Holland x reader #tom holland imagines #tom holland fluff #tom holland one shot #tom holland angst #tom holland headcanon #tom holland drabble #tom stanley holland #Peter Parker #Peter Parker x reader #Peter Parker imagines #ally’s requests

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9tzuyu · 3 years

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dissolve (rewrite)

natasha x reader

note: this was just a huge vent fic idk. these type of fics seem to be the only thing im okay at writing. mistakes are mine as always. but i did proofread, yay!

if you want to read the original (as awful as it is) you can read it here!

wanrings: this heavily revolves around eating disorders.

i’m not tagging anyone because the content isn’t really the lightest to read.

words are used everyday, everywhere – whether to describe something or someone. there’s thousands upon thousands of them.

so you were having a hard time figuring out why you were struggling so much to justify your feelings through the basis of words. it was unnerving, draining and very annoying. your emotions should be simple, right? you were either sad or happy, angry or scared. but there was something more, something unexplainable. saying you felt alone only scratched the surface of the wave of emotion that took over. it was excruciatingly painful, far worse than any physical pain you ever had to endure. and for some reason it seemed to come crashing down at night while natasha slept peacefully. you weren't exactly sure how to express your emotions to the extent you felt them. how else was anyone supposed to understand your pain? they couldn't, not unless they could somehow shift into your body and feel your emotions themselves. but that was merely impossible as such powers do not exist. so you were inevitably stuck with words foreign to your lips. over the years you were deemed unsafe, a hazard, "an accident waiting to happen" you recall one doctor say. everyone’s eyes were on you at all times, monitoring every little movement you made. it was suffocating and at times doing more damage than good.

as an adult now you learned how freeing it could be without the fear of gaining weight or eating a bowl full of rainbow marshmallow cereal. your worth was not defined by your weight.

(at least that's what you believed prior to any relapses.) everything was going well in your life. you were a college graduate working as a psychiatric nurse and you had found love, something your teenage self could only dream of. natasha was by your side through everything. and really, the only downfall in the relationship was that she had to travel a lot for her job. but you were secure enough in your relationship not to worry or decide to call things off. in the end natasha always made up for it when she came back, so you couldn't complain too much. things were going well for you, really, they were. until they weren't. (and you didn't know why.) it happened out of nowhere. work was a little more stressful than usual, but it was nothing you couldn't handle. natasha had been away for three months, only stopping by a few times to check in on you. but again, your wife being away for so long wasn't anything new or worrisome. the two of you had followed the routine of her leaving and coming back more than a thousand times; yet somewhere along the way you lost yourself. food became less of a priority, your hunger decreased drastically, and within the first month you'd lost thirteen pounds. it truly was an accident, slipping into a full blown relapse was never part of the plan. but thirteen pounds lighter you wanted more, to feel small again. you didn't have an answer as to why you became so attached to your eating disorder, but it didn't seem like it would be letting go any time soon. the rate at which you were going natasha would most definitely be able to see a difference; not only on your weight, but in the person you once were. she'd ask what happened and why it happened, poking and prodding for an answer, but you didn't have one. so here you stood in the kitchen of your shared home, a cup of sliced fruit in one hand and your cell phone in the other. you poured the fruit into the bottom of a blender along with a spoonful of yogurt and half a cup of soy milk. another half cup of ice followed suit. while the fruit blended, you shamelessly scrolled through your instagram. there was nothing interesting going on in other people's lives, you didn't even know why you had social media in the first place. it was dumb, and quite frankly you didn't give a shit whether or not sharon went to the beach. the sound of your blender coming to a halt brought your attention back to the real world. you poured your smoothie into your water bottle. the green liquid would be your breakfast and lunch for the day - dinner was still up for debate. a soft sigh left your lips. work was beginning to feel more like a chore and less of something you enjoyed. you were quickly growing tired of it. nonetheless, you grabbed your keys and rushed out of the door.

you thought about the irony of working as a psychiatric nurse with an undealt eating disorder telling teenagers how to deal with their own issues. you felt hypocritical to say the least, especially given that all the nasty side effects were starting to make themselves known.

your hair was beginning to thin, small clumps of it already starting to fall out when you tugged a little too hard. bruises could be seen scattered left and right on your body, and you were cold. god you were cold. your fingernails were tinted blue, warmth seemingly too far out of reach. you looked ill, and it didn't go unnoticed by your coworkers.

a few hours into your shift you found yourself sitting behind the nurses station filling out paperwork. lunch had passed and when your coworker, steve, asked if you were going to eat something you lied straight through your teeth, telling him you'd grab something when the patients were eating dinner.

but steve rogers could read you like an open book. he knew you were lying because he already knew what was going on. the signs of an eating disorder were quite obvious when you were a licensed therapist. and despite your futile attempts at hiding it, everyone could tell something wasn't right.

steve played it by ear for weeks until he contacted natasha, but by then you'd already lost a considerable amount of weight. as soon as she heard the news, natasha booked the next flight home. unfortunately for her though, there was only one flight and she would have to wait two and a half weeks before being able to leave.

you didn't know it, but those were the longest two and a half weeks natasha ever had to wait.

– patients were having group therapy, so you could tune them out - not that you should, but it was hard to focus when the only two things you could think about were food and your weight.

the need to lose weight sounded so stereotypical for someone with an eating disorder, but honestly it wasn't about that. it was never about wanting to be thin. you genuinely didn't know why this was happening. the only thing you noticed was how rewarding it felt seeing the number go down, as if for you were good for becoming less. it was addictive. and it didn't help that you based your entire worth on how much you could lose.

the next time you stood up from behind the nurses station steve met you in the the cafeteria. while the patients ate you took occasional sips from your smoothie. the bottle was still full of its contents from the morning. you had completely forgotten to drink it during the day, but you didn't seem to mind it that much.

the surprise touch of steve's hand on your shoulder startled you.

i am gross, you thought. do not do that.

steve caught onto the slight flinch your body produced as a reflex, but he didn't say anything about it.

"you can leave early, boss said so."

he laughed as he saw confusion plaster your face.

"what? no!"

"go home, seriously. we have this handled. you know tony doesn't like being told no."

you bit your lip, puzzled by the sudden request. most people wouldn't mind being sent home early, but all it did for you was give you a level of anxiety reserved for food.

what you didn't know was that natasha was home waiting for your arrival. she came back just short of an hour after you left for work.

while you were gone natasha made a few thorough rounds in the house looking for key signs of your eating disorder. there was bound to be evidence given that you didn't know she was home.

unsurprisingly, natasha found a glass scale beside the counter of the bathroom floor along with empty bottles of laxatives in the trashcan. the food in the fridge had been expired a few days past their date, giving her the indication that you weren't eating as much as you should be. her concern grew even more when she found your food journal on your nightstand. flipping the pages, natasha could see that throughout the moths she'd been gone your calorie intake had decreased significantly.

guilt began to gnaw at the back of her throat.

during the few days natasha stopped by, she hadn't noticed anything wrong with you. but then again she knew most people with eating disorders were very good at hiding them up until the point they were discovered. three days wasn't near enough time for her to catch onto your tricks, not when her mind was still focused on her job.

natasha always listened intently whenever you would talk about your eating disorder, the first time being six months into the relationship on a date you felt like you had ruined.

but talking about it was much different than experiencing it with you, natasha had never done that before up until now. she read nearly every article there was about anorexia, bulimia, binge eating disorder and ednos. sometimes when you were asleep she would watch documentaries on the disorder, always making sure to keep her volume at a low level.

the videos that hurt her the most were the ones teenagers struggling with the simple task of eating food.

(although natasha knew it wasn't that simple.)

it hurt because she knew that was you at some point in time.

upon your arrival, natasha cooked dinner. she wanted to hold onto the one sliver of hope that steve was wrong - that he was just overreacting - but she knew in her heart he was right about his assumption. however, dinner would only confirm what natasha so desperately wanted to deny.

when you walked through the door you were greeted with the overwhelming scent of food. you cringed at the thought of having to eat, but as soon as you looked up to see the redhead who'd been gone for so long your frown was washed away. a wide smile overtook your face and you rushed to jump into natasha's arms.

"i missed you so much," you whispered. "i thought you'd be gone for another few weeks?"

natasha's arms found their way around your waist as your legs wrapped around hers. "what? i can't come home early to surprise my wife?" you giggled in the crook of her neck. she smiled feeling the vibrations against her skin, happy to know that you'd missed her just as much as she missed you.

she sat you down, back facing you, she tended to the food. "you've lost weight," she commented, not missing the sharp inhale of your breath.

"how was work, nat?"

she nodded to herself. yeah, she didn't expect you to be so open on the first try.

"it was fine. dinner's ready, i made your favorite!" natasha threw a smile in your direction as she carried the plates over to the table. she had hoped to see your face light up the way it used to, but seeing the panicked look in your eyes further confirmed your relapse.

if nothing else, natasha wanted you to have a meal before she brought up the conversation.

"great... i love it, thank you nat!" your attempt at being enthusiastic failed miserably and you knew by the look she gave you, she already knew what was going on.

but throughout the meal, and despite the shakiness of your hand as it gripped the metal fork, natasha didn't say anything.

you weren't really sure which was worse; being confronted or knowing the both of you knew what the other was thinking and still not addressing it.

natasha's meal was good, you couldn't lie about that, but each bite you chewed caused the tightening in your chest to constrict further.

now you couldn't be good. or worthy. or deserving.

nat took away your plate when you were halfway through. she knew your limits, and she didn't want to push you too much out of your comfort zone.

"go change, i'll wash our dishes. meet you on the couch?"

you did as you were told, taking as long as you could to do so. except this time was different. you didn't glance in the mirror like you usually did, you chose to fully take in your figure.

what you saw was not what you expected to see. for the first time in months you saw a version of yourself that wasn't twisted and turned to be something you didn't know was real or not.

your skin was dry, hair thinned out beyond your belief, eyes sunken and dark underneath. the revelation gave you an odd feeling – was once again something unexplainable, unjustifiable by words.

good.

that was how you were supposed to feel, right? after all of this time, after the many pounds of protection and warmth lost, you were supposed to feel good.

but you didn't. and you never would.

there was something so surreal about the realization of your own destruction. you were aware now, which meant you had to either take responsibility or choose to lose everything you worked so hard for.

"y/n?"

your wife's voice snapped you out of your gaze and you scrambled to pile your dirty clothes and rush out of the bedroom.

as you made your way into the living room you could feel the intensity of natasha's gaze. any other time you would not mind her green eyes looking at you, but this time around you felt like you were in trouble.

she patted the empty spot next to her, to which you reluctantly joined. but even after everything you still tried to play it cool.

"what's up? is everything okay?"

she gave a low chuckle, "you tell me."

"what do you mean?"

"oh i think you know what i mean."

natasha’s reply was met with the loudest silence you ever had to sit through.

she bit her lip, "you know i got a call from steve a few weeks ago. he's concerned about you, and from what he's told me so am i."

you were quick to respond, automatically knowing what steve’s phone call was about. "i'm fine. so what if i've lost a couple of pounds? that doesn't automatically mean that im relapsing, natasha."

your quick snap reminded natasha that this kind of confrontation was like walking on eggshells.

she tilted her head, licking her lips. "i'm here with you, always." nat put a hand to the side of your face, gently rubbing her thumb at the top of your cheekbone. "i'm here."

it seemed pointless now to try and say anything because your secret was already out.

your mind began racing back and forth.

you wanted to keep what you knew best and natasha understood that. even by reading your body language she knew what you were debating.

"you know, to keep it you have to give it away." your eyes darted to meet hers. "mhm. you can still have that piece of you. mourn it, grieve it, do whatever you need to do to move onto a stage where it doesn't hurt you. and from there you can help other people, share your experience, let yourself heal by helping others."

she paused, “we all have choices. some of those choices are taken from you while others leave you with only one option.”

although what she said seemed to resonate with you, there was one thing still holding you back.

"i just want to be good."

natasha hummed. you had explained it to her in the past, though your words were jumbled together as you tried to describe it.

"you can be good in other ways. you're allowed to live a life outside of the barriers your eating disorder puts in the way."

you swallowed the lump in the back of your throat. "i don't even know how it got to this point. in january i enjoyed ihop and dennys. in february i could have oatmeal and bananas, sometimes half of a sandwhich if i was feeling brave. now it’s march and i only eat one or two things a day. the idea of having a full meal makes me want to cry. and i just- i don't know how to stop."

natasha wouldn't show it, but your words cut through her heart like a knife. her mind wandered briefly to all the teenagers in the documentaries she'd watched, hoping you weren't too far gone into your eating disorder to ever come back. those cases scared her the most.

"you've got my complete support. you've tackled this before, maybe this time you can beat it? i know its easier to abuse your body instead of growing comfortable in it, but i think you’ve got this. i know you do."

"what about your work?" your question caused natasha to frown. "you think i wouldn't set my job aside for you?" you shrugged, it's not like you felt like you were worth being taken care of anyway.

natasha grew hesitant to tell you her news, but did it anyway because she’d rather you hate her than see you dead. "i've already made some appointments for you. the first one is tomorrow morning."

"i figured you would natasha. it's okay."

you spaced yourself out the rest of the day. each time you made the executive decision to recover, whether that be a genuine recovery or not, the process never failed to remind you that even trying to recover from an eating disorder felt like mourning the loss of a friend who was never good for you in the first place.

#natasha romanoff x reader #black widow x reader #avengers x reader #natasha romanov x reader #natasha x reader #natasha romanoff imagine

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hearteyesbowen · 4 years

Note

Idk if anyone has asked you this but I was watching josh’s live yesterday and all the faces he makes when he sings are adorable anyways I was wondering if you could write something where he doesn’t like the faces that he makes and he gets self conscious about them but you reassure him that they are cute and that you adore the faces he makes.

livestream ☆ joshua bassett

joshua finally lets y/n stay with him while he does a livestream, but she tends to distract him without her even knowing it

warnings: fluff, shorter than what i usually write

♡ ♡ ♡ ♡

“Please, Josh, I promise I won’t do anything bad.”

“No, because I’m going to be in the middle of talking to my fans or singing a song and then you’re going to do something that catches my attention and suddenly I have to explain to everyone who I’m looking at, again.” Josh argued.

You pouted, slouching on his soft bed. You reached for Franklin, his teddy bear, and cuddled it close to you as you plopped back on the bed. You sighed loudly, making sure to let him know your despair.

Josh watched you overreact on the blankets he left messy on the mattress. He was sat at the same chair in front of his desk that he always sat at when he does live videos. He thought you looked adorable at how you begged to be with him.

He remembered the first time he allowed you to stay with him during a live video. You were on his bed and admiring him from far away as he sung. Every time he sang a song or engaged with his fans, you could tell how happy he was. After he sang a Bruno Mars song, you felt giddy inside, so you silently clapped your hands together as to not make a sound. Josh noticed you and blushed while he stared at you. This erupted thousands of comments on both his live and his Instagram posts about who he was with and if he had a girlfriend. Of course, he didn’t get mad at you, but it was hard to convince everyone that it wasn’t you and only a friend, since you were often questioned on social media if you were Josh’s “mystery girl.” It’s also why you were not allowed to be with him anymore during his livestreams, just to be sure he wouldn’t have to do any other clarifying.

As for your relationship with each other, it was somewhat complicated. You both knew you have some sort of feelings for each other. You went on a couple of dates, a lot of them staying over at one’s house and watching movies. Neither of you had made anything official, your guess was that he wanted to take things slow. However, it didn’t dawn upon you how slow he liked to be.

You sat up and gently placed Franklin on his pillow before you stood up and walked over to Josh. He raised his eyebrows at you, wondering what you were about to do. You motioned for him to move his hands from his lap so you could sit. Once he held his hands up, you sat down on his lap and held your arms around his neck while he held you at your waist.

“Please?” You begged one last time, taking off the hat he wore under his hoodie and throwing it on the wooden surface next to him.

Finally, Josh groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose. “You can stay in my room, but no distractions.”

You smiled widely, tightening your arms around him for a hug. You heard a small laugh escape his lips as you stuffed your face into his neck. You pulled away and took a glimpse at his red lips, noticing how much softer they looked today. The room was silent, as if everything stopped. You gazed at each other for what seemed like years, just you two. All you could think of was how nice it would be to have your lips on his, holding onto his body tightly.

As if he read your mind, Josh slowly leaned up, hesitantly reaching for your lips. You both tried inching closer, but it was clear how nervous you were. Your lips were still somewhat far, but it didn’t stop the anxiousness you felt the more the space between you closed. You had never kissed anyone yet, so the feeling you felt as his breath fanned over your lips sent shivers down your spine.

The alarm on Josh’s phone went off, making you both jump slightly. You tapped the screen to check the time, seeing it was only five minutes before he said he would go live.

You turned back to him and patted his chest. “You should get ready.”

Josh sat there, silently frustrated at himself for not making the move. You stood up and threw yourself on his bed, reflecting on the past two minutes that you could have changed.

➢➣ ➢➣

Halfway through Josh’s livestream, you stopped paying attention to him. You loved listening to him and sing, you could listen to him forever, but the memory of your possible first kiss engulfed your brain every time you even heard his voice.

Now you were lying down on your back, holding your phone up high above your head with your headphones plugged into your ears as you blocked out Josh’s voice as best as you could. Usually his livestreams don’t last too long, but it felt like it’s been an hour already.

Clearly you were lost into thought, too busy scrolling through Twitter, that you didn’t even notice when the mattress sank down by your legs. Josh crawled over the bed, resting his hands on either side of your head and his knees between yours. Soon your screen was covered when a curly-haired boy shoved his head between your arms, forcing you to wrap your hands around his head. His face expressed worry the more you stared at him without talking.

“You’re less talkative than you usually are, what happened?” Josh wondered.

You shrugged, not letting out a single noise. He huffed, lightly blowing some of the curls away from his head, and plopped himself down next to you on his bed. You let him rest his head on your arm once he went to cuddle your torso, leaving your other hand to mess with your own hair. Instantly, the warmth of his body clutching yours overcame the uneasy feelings you had earlier.

“What were you looking at?”

Josh took your phone from the other side of your hip and tapped in the passcode, the day of your first date. The Twitter app opened, showing your timeline of tweets from the people you followed.

“Some of your fans are already posting screenshots from your live.” You murmured as you see the first screen recording of Josh.

A silent groan escaped his lips the more he watched the clip. He sang “Say You Won’t Let Go” by James Arthur, one of your favorite songs. You giggled as you watch him struggle hitting the lower notes, scrunching up his nose and his repeated use of the word “yikes.”

Josh had enough of watching that clip and exited the app. He went to the Instagram app and typed in his username, then going to his tags. Numerous screen recordings and photos of his livestream were being posted by the minute. Curious, he tapped the most recent one of him singing yet another song.

You stopped paying attention to the video, now only watching his face in disgust as he watched himself. You pouted, using your free hand to remove your phone away from his grasp and pushed aside some of the hair still framing his forehead.

“What ails you, dear?” You ask, holding back a laugh from your choice of words.

He raised an eyebrow at you, grinning for a second before sighing. “I make the stupidest faces when I sing.”

You pushed yourself up, using your arm to hold you up. Josh still lying down, he covered his face with his hands.

“Why do you think that?”

“Look at me!” He reached for your phone and quickly finding a clip to show you. “Why do I look like that?”

“I think it’s cute.” You argue, pushing his hands off his head.

Josh grumbled, almost ripping out the locks of his hair. “But I feel like I look like an idiot. I’m always making those dumb faces, like I can’t even sing normally. I hate seeing myself sing because then I just get self-conscious.”

“Joshua, you’re being so overdramatic. You look perfectly fine. If anything, your fans love the cute little movements you make.” You reassure.

He studied your face for any hints of deceit. You smiled, feeling the heat rise to your cheeks the more he watched you.

Josh finally sat up, your faces now inches apart. The tingling feeling you felt in your stomach a while ago came back. His fingers crept onto your cheek, pushing aside some of the hair by your eyebrow.

“You shouldn’t have to feel insecure about how you look, Josh. You’re literally the cutest guy in the world.”

Your whisper set off a sudden new confidence in him, something that he had been trying to discover since your first date.

“I am?” He wondered with little bits of disbelief from your comment.

The tips of your noses touched, and you hitched your breath. This has been the closest you two have ever gotten. You were not going to chicken out of this one, not again, at least.

You pushed your lips onto his, leaving a short peck on his lips. The new feeling of someone kissing someone set fire to your body. Once you pulled away, your eyes grew wide at Josh’s surprised expression. His mouth was slightly agape, eyes still wide open.

The corners of his lips curved upwards, forming his familiar smile. “Why’d you pull back?”

That phrase barely left you enough time to think about what just happened, as Josh crashed his lips back to yours. Your eyes widened at his sudden move, but you soon relaxed as the feeling of his lips on yours became more important than anything.

You reached up behind his head and clutched his hair, making Josh let out a soft moan. His hands snaked your waist as he pushed you back down on the bed, hovering over you again.

It wasn’t the most experienced kiss at first, but you quickly found your way. Nothing between you two has ever felt more passionate. Your lips moved slowly, still captivated by the thought of you being with each other.

Josh pulled away, lingering one last kiss on your swollen lips. Your eyes blissfully fluttered open, soon looking up at his red, smiling face.

“If I knew that talking about my insecurities meant you would finally kiss me, I would have done it much sooner.” He joked, reaching down to capture your lips on his once more.

A/N - sorry this is short and late i was finishing up with some online school work but now im on spring break so hopefully i can get another post this saturday !! also another sorry for the person who requested this , i was trying to finish my other drafts before i started requests , i hope u like it (: next post is the second part to twenty-dollar baby so be on the lookout <3 love y’all xx

#ricky bowen imagine #ricky bowen x reader #ricky bowen #ricky bowen blurbs #ricky bowen fluff #ricky bowen angst #ricky bowen oneshot #joshua bassett x reader #joshua bassett imagine #joshua bassett #joshua bassett oneshot #joshua bassett blurbs #joshua bassett fluff #joshua bassett angst #hsmtmts #hsmtmts imagine

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en-theheights · 4 years

Text

All the problems with HSMTMTS:

I keep getting asked question on what happened in the fandom, and what is going on against all of the s*xual assault allegations against J*shua and T*m. This is going to be the post where I lay out all that I know of and inform the tumblr fandom on it because not all of you are on Twitter, and Tumblr is literally the heaven amongst fandoms. After this post, I’m DONE talking about this show and being apart of this toxic group. Along with talking about the s*xual assault allegations, I will also be addressing the issues during the BLM movement and other crap that not only the cast and crew have been a part of, but also the fandom itself. Let’s dig in.

Sidenote: I really don’t want any hate, I’m just trying to be open with you guys and inform you all. Also, I’m doing my best to remember everything, so if there is something that you want to know more on then please just message me personally cause I’m seriously SICK of discussing it publicly.

Not eveything in the fandom is due to JUST the cast and crew. This fandom is FULL of very toxic and creepy people.

A few months ago, someone (a grown women) who was overly obsessed with Olivia hacked into her grandfather’s account to turn it into a fan page to get undercover information on Olivia, as well as getting information on where Olivia lived. This grown women has also done some other seriously inappropriate things. If you want to learn more about the sketchy things that this women has done than you can go to Twitter and look it up.

There are always ship wars in fandoms, but this one takes it WAY too seriously. I’ve seen people get attack on their looks just for being a part of a ship. The ones that are heavily abusive are Rina vs Rini, Seblos vs CJ, and redlyn vs Redky. It has cause people to leave the fandom due to how bad the attacking got. On Tumblr, everyone’s pretty open about ships, but on twitter it is a literal battle field.

Disgraceful people still continue to ship the actors instead of the characters. J*livia and J*fia is what I’m going to talk more closely about. (First, josh is a grown adult and both Sofia and Olivia are minors, please unfollow me if you don’t see anything wrong with that). Sofia had to delete a few of her tik toks after one with Joshua went viral and people wouldn’t stop shipping her and him in her comments. Like one video she did, the caption was “I want a boyfriend” and people assumed they were dating and wouldn’t stop tagging him in her videos. As for Olivia, people have been shipping them since the beginning of the show. Fan accounts on all platforms have dedicated their time to this. I don’t necessarily remember if Sofia or Olivia came out saying that they were uncomfortable when they got shipped with their cast mates, but it started causing drifts between the actors because of this and Joshua wasn’t featured in any of Sofia’s videos after that and Olivia didn’t post as much as she use to with him. It goes to show that shipping actors makes things awkward and strained within their personal relationships. DONT DO THIS!

A person stating that they were friend’s with Olivia came out to expose Joshua of being a bad boyfriend after she tells everyone that Olivia and Joshua has been secretly dating during the press tour of HSMTMTS. There was clever evidence that showed they were dating and the girl came out with multiple receipts, and even went so far as to go on Instagram live to speak on the matter. But she then came out stating that it was false and she only wanted some attention. Apparently she was a j*livia stan. I can’t find anything on twitter about it anymore, since I’m pretty sure eveything was deleted. This can ruin people’s careers and I don’t know why anyone could think it’s okay.

There are genuinely a lot of creepy adults that roam around in the HSM fandom. On twitter, there would be grown adults writing in detail how the kissing scene between Joshua and Olivia made them feel. People continue to post the gif of Nini and Ricky kissing and write out why it’s so important to them. People have taken that kissing scene and literally turned it into nasty and inappropriate sm*t on AO3 and Wattpad. Note once again that these characters are minors and it’s NEVER okay to write inappropriate stories about children. Grown adults need to be held accountable for their actions if this is how they’re acting.

Some parts of the fandom genuinely hate on both Sofia and Olivia for literally nothing. Just jealousy between their ships, and because of it, they think it’s okay to to personally attack the actresses on their looks and where they are in there careers. People continuously pin Olivia and Sofia against each other, like for example people bashing Olivia for not being as successful as Sofia, or Sofia being bashed because she doesn’t have the same singing career as Olivia. It’s once again, DISGUSTING!

This one is more about Disney and then not doing their part. Disney cut out the majority of Seblos’ scenes, which caused a lot of turmoil within the fandom and why Seblos felt unattached and awkward while they were together in all of their scenes after the dance episode. People called out Disney and said they they shouldn’t have put Seblos in if they weren’t going to go full out with it.

Onto the cast and the crew:

Kate (miss Jenn) got a lot of hate for exposing that Frankie (Carlos) and Joe(Seb) are in an actual real life relationship without asking them for their consent to tell the world. Don’t know whether they had spoken about them being in a relationship or not, but Kate didn’t speak on it after that either.

A video came out a few days ago of the cast taking cast pictures during their tour, and Mark (Mr. Mazzara) was standing beside Sofia in which it looks like his hand was rubbing Sofia’s lower back, and she seemed uncomfortable. I’m not sure if it’s a stretch or not because the video is super blurry and it’s hard to kind of see their faces, but you can clearly see his hand go behind her back. Personally for me, I didn’t notice anything too alarming, but you’d have to see for youself. I won’t be posting that and instead you can dm me personally and I’ll send you the link to the video.

A past comment of Joshua’s was exposed in which he is saying the F slur. #joshuabassettisoverparty was trending world wide on Twitter, with people wanting him off the show. He has apologized for it since then, but not many ever forgave him and it was just really his young girl audience that came to his defense, even though it wasn’t their apology to forgive. People that only stan him because he is a cute cis white male didn’t see the problem in what he had said, and kept saying that he was young and that it’s not a reason for us to hate on him, but he was only 17 when he said that, and it’s no excuse. Personally to me, his apology was super bland and he didn’t address it personally on his Twitter, but instead replied to a post saying he’d do better. Here’s what he had said:

Here is his apology on this:

Joshua also went on a live in which he said “boys, gals, or whatever” People accused him of being transphobic and enbyphobic. Others think that his words were being blown out of proportion. Here is that video:

I found it to be very ridiculous and rude that he doesn’t follow anybody on twitter or tik tok. On a live video, Julia said something about him not following her, and he just says that he doesn’t follow anybody and she shouldn’t take it personally. Honestly not that big of a deal, but it’s still shows pitifullness and arrogancy. Don’t know what his contract looks like with whatever agency he’s with, but maybe they’re just strict on that, but idk.

People hate on Matt (EJ) for being republican. He hasn’t done anything problematic or said anything out of offense, so for me he’s good. UPDATE: Turns out, Matt is friends with Benjamin Lawson Adams, a convicted pedophile. Here’s a brief statement in what happened:

He worked for the Weinstein company, so no surprise there. His arrest happened in May 2016, and his license was suspended to practice Law in July of 2018. If Matt knew what was best for him, he would stop having any and all associations with this dude.

That’s all I can think of on situations not regarding the s*xual assault allegations or the BLM movement. But there’s probably so much I’m missing. I’m going to make a part 2, cause the next half is too long to post here as well. I’ll label it #exposinghsmtmts so others are able to see it.

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angelic-holland · 5 years

Text

Palm Trees // th x fem!reader

Summary: You were starring alongside Scarlett Johansson in the new Black Widow movie, she’s a younger spy that Nat saves from the Red Room, trains her to be better. You meet Tom prior to the premiere of The Red Room and he agrees to be your date.

Part of my Drive North series. Based on the song Palm Trees by the SWMRs, listen to it while reading. As you will hear in the song, it discusses the corruption of Hollywood and younger more naive people being taken advantage of in the industry.

Warnings: brief sexual harassment (not Tom), angst

Word Count: 6.1K

Sarah! Sarah! Look over here! Sarah! Smile!” You hear people shout and you wave and grin as your security walks you inside Jimmy Kimmel’s studio. Your stage name, Sarah Winters was being called left and right.

You know that they were really waiting for Scarlett who would be arriving soon, but they knew a little about your role in the movie, they’ve seen the behind the scenes photos and they’ve seen the trailer, so they’ve got some idea of who you are.

You made your way inside, getting put in your own dressing room which was literally a dream, something you’ve been thinking about and hoping would happen since you were a little girl.

When Scarlett arrived she hugged you tight. When Jimmy asked you questions about the movie, you talked excitedly and animatedly, almost spoiling a huge plot point when Scarlett put her hand over your mouth.

“Looks like Holland’s gonna get a run for his money on the spoilers,” she laughs and you’re blushing, you totally knew what you could and couldn’t say but this was the first big, TV interview you’d ever done. You were just incredibly excited.

Later that night you posted some photos on your Instagram, the first one being a shot of Scarlett’s hand over your mouth with your eyes wide.

You laughed as you captioned it, “let’s play how to keep Y/N from spoiling the entire Black Widow movie”.

You posted it and as you got ready for bed, exhausted from the long day of press. Before falling asleep you saw some comments, most of them were funny, a lot were tagging Tom saying that you were coming for his title.

You saw a notification that Tom had commented on your post as well, probably because everyone kept tagging him.

tomholland2013: as spoiler king, you can be spoiler queen, no stealing my title

You rolled your eyes, blushing a little. You ignored the onslaught of people commenting, lots of those sideways glancing eye emojis, a few keyboard smashes. You’ve never even met the guy. A few moments later you noticed he had followed you. You wondered if he would be at the Black Widow premiere, then maybe you could meet him. Since before you were cast as the young woman who Natasha takes under her wing, you’ve always been a fan of Marvel movies, the smallest crush on the actor who played Spiderman. He was attractive, seemed nice enough, your age; what more could you ask for?

You sent a quick text to Scarlett, asking if other MCU actors would be at the premiere.

Scarlett: why? Hoping a certain someone might show up?

You: psshhh no I don’t know what you mean

Scarlett: Tom might be there, let me ask

You: no omg he’ll wanna know why you’re asking

Scarlett: no he won’t give me a second

You groan, putting your phone on the edge of the bedside table and trying to sleep.

You wake up the next morning by your alarm. You’ve got a flight to London to do one last round of press before the premiere in a week.

You shower quickly and toss on a comfortable sweatshirt and gym shorts before shoving your PJs into your suitcase, making sure you had everything from your hotel room. You make it to the car that was waiting for you on time, miraculously, before checking your phone.

You noticed a text from an unknown number and frowned, opening it as you got in the backseat.

“Airport?” The driver asks.

“Yes please, thank you!”

Unknown number: Hey so I heard you need a date to the Black Widow premiere.

You: sorry who is this?

You check your texts to Scarlett.

Scarlett: a certain someone may or may not have asked if you’re going with anyone to the premiere, told him you weren’t, think you might be interested in having him on your arm for the night

You: wait, like, Tom Holland , that’s who we’re talking about? No way you didn’t convince him out of pity

You’re heart is sort of racing as you wait for a response from Scarlett.

She sends back a screenshot of her conversation with Tom, her asking if he’s going to the premiere. Then him asking if you have a date. And Scarlett telling him you didn’t, but he better act fast and then she sent your phone number.

You quickly add the unknown number in your phone.

You: I mean, you don’t even know me like at all, what would make you want to be my date?

You’re shocked by how quickly he answers.

Tom: well I could get to know you.

You: you know everyone and their mother is freaking out about that insta comment of yours?

Tom: their mothers too? Quite nosy aren’t they?

Tom: So, when can I meet you? See if you’re truly the spoiler queen

You: I ALMOST say one thing and suddenly I’m the spoiler queen? At least I didn’t actually spoil any big plot points from the movie

Tom: fine fine you haven’t earned that title yet

Tom: you and Scarlett will be in London tomorrow right?

You: you stalking me?

Tom: no, just asked Scarlett

“Miss? We’re at the airport.”

You look up and sure enough your driver has pulled up to the airport. Someone opens the door, greeting themselves as your security, taking your suitcase from the trunk and offering to hold your backpack.

“I’m fine thank you,” you say as he walks you into the airport. Thankfully there aren’t any paparazzi or fans of Scarlett here, who was taking a later flight.

You check in and your suitcase is sent off before you go through security, Todd, the security person following you. He let you know he’d be with you until your flight and then when you landed in London there would be another person waiting for you.

This was all new to you, having security with you at airports, when you went to press events, the rare occasion of being recognized when you’re out and about.

You checked your phone again while waiting to board. It was a short wait, another thing you’ve never experienced, one was plane flights in general, the other was getting to be in first class. You felt so fancy you lost your mind the first time you flew with the cast to a filming location in Europe.

You waited for your seat location to be called, seeing another text from Tom.

Tom: I’ll be in London for the next few days, call me when you land

You gulp, quickly responding before boarding.

You: will do

The entire plane ride you attempt to sleep, try not to think of Tom fucking Holland asking you to call him. It doesn’t work. You sit there, watch movie after movie, trying to keep your mind off the boy. You gave up and put on Spiderman: Homecoming. You’ve seen it before so you let yourself get a little lost in the story, falling asleep about halfway through. You’re woken up by the rumble of the plane touching down.

***

You make it to your hotel with limited problems, you at first couldn’t find the security person waiting for you then realized he was holding a sign with your stage last name and not your real last name.

“Hi Miss Winters, I’ll be working with you while you’re in London, names Rick, shall we head to the hotel?”

“That’d be great, thank you,” you say, noting he’s already got your suitcase.

You see another text from Tom and blush as you sit in the car.

Tom: don’t wanna sound like a weirdo tho so ur totally not obligated to go out with me if you don’t want to

You: who said anything about going out?

Tom: I just meant, like to get to know each other before you whisk me away on the red carpet

You: I’ll see if I can sneak away from the hotel tonight, don’t have press until tomorrow

Tom: I could come to you

You: huh

Tom: we could hang in your hotel room, order room service, besides if we are out and about together the instagram comments would be the least of our problems

You: problems?

You frown, problems? You didn’t want to stir up trouble, you didn’t want to get death threats from teenagers over Tom either, considering you don’t even know the type of person he is, considering you’re just going to hang out.

Tom: well I’m just not really in the mood to be swarmed on the street by paps and fans and stuff

Tom: unless you wanna go out then we can, it’s whatever

You: no, no id much rather that not happen, hasn’t really happened to me yet and I’d prefer it to stay that way

Tom: after this you’ll be so famous you won’t know what to do with yourself

You laugh to yourself, Randy glancing at you.

You: highly doubt I’ll be loved nearly as much as you are

Tom: nonsense

You: I’ll be at The Savoy hotel, you know it?

Tom: I can use google

You: idk I heard you were pretty bad with technology

Tom: you’re right, google and texting are the only two things I feel 100% sure I can do

“Miss Winters? We’re at the hotel. Your schedule for the next few days should be in your email. You have the rest of the day off though.”

You nod, time zones were messing with your head, “what time is it right now?”

“10am.”

“Thank you,” you say as you both get out of the car. You check into your room and thank Rick for your suitcase.

You toss your backpack and suitcase down before flopping onto the bed, checking your phone.

Tom: are you at the hotel now?

You: yea

Tom: ok

You checked out the room service food, realizing since you slept on your flight you were starving. You decide to order pizza even though it’s early, you called and they said they could get some delivered from a local shop. You check your phone and see that Tom texted you again.

Tom: on my way, what’s your room #

You: 413

Oh, he was already on his way, shit. You practically jump out of bed and open your suitcase. You know it shouldn’t matter what you wear. But you change out of your oversized sweatshirt into a plain white T-shirt, keeping your gym shorts on. You thank god that your job and press required you to shave. Because although you didn’t think anything would happen, you wanted to feel confident if it did.

You changed quickly and brushed your teeth, jumping back into bed. You grabbed your book, East of Eden, your favorite book, it’s had plenty of wear and tear since you’ve read it so many times but you couldn’t get rid of it or get yourself a new copy.

You picked up where you left off, the story of young Adam Trask and his brother Charles, arguably your favorite and the best part of the book, seeing the dynamic between the two of them, then seeing how Adam grows for the rest of the book.

The door rang as you finished the chapter. You set the book upside down and grabbed your wallet, you checked through the peephole to confirm it was your pizza, as if on cue your stomach was rumbling. You thanked the person and tipped them, the pizza charged to your room.

You settled back into your bed, about to open the pizza when your doorbell rang again. You got up and looked through the peephole.

Tom was standing outside your room, hands in the pockets of sweatpants he was wearing, paired with what looked like an oversized hoodie. Okay, maybe you weren’t underdressed previously. You opened the door, leaning against the frame.

“Hi spoiler king,” you grin.

“Nice to finally meet you spoiler queen.”

“Finally?”

“Yeah, been wanting to meet you since you started filming Black Widow.”

“Didn’t know you knew I existed until a few days ago.”

“Well, surprise,” he laughs, shrugging, “you gonna let me in or should we continue this conversation here?”

“Oh my god sorry I’m such an idiot, come on in,” you say, walking backwards into the room. You feel the heel of your foot hit the back of your suitcase and you can’t stop yourself from falling. Tom rushes forward and catches you, arm around your waist and pulling you back up.

“How in the world are you playing this super spy when you trip over a suitcase?”

You chuckle, blushing as he helps you steady yourself, nudging your suitcase to the side as he closes the door.

“I play a super spy in training thank you very much,” you say as his hand leaves your waist and you quietly miss the feeling of his hand there.

“Well, guess you’re excused then.”

“Do you, want some pizza?” You ask, sitting on the edge of your bed and opening the box.

“Little early for pizza,” he observes.

“Haven’t eaten, in, oh god I don’t even remember, since the night before I got on the plane to come here from LA?” You say, stomach rumbling.

“Then I think you should dig right into that pizza,” Tom says, sitting on the edge of the bed next to you.

“Good plan,�� you say, ignoring how awkward you feel and taking a bite of a slice. He grabs your book and reads the title.

“East of Eden, never read it before.”

“I mean I would act all offended because it’s my favorite book but I know that like not a lot of people who have read it. You should though, if you find the time.”

“Yeah this looks long and I’m way too dyslexic to read that without giving up halfway through.”

“Oh shit sorry I had no idea.”

“All good, kinda a running joke with my fans and people.”

“That you’re dyslexic?”

“Yeah,” he shrugs, thumb running through the pages.

You finish your pizza, watching his face as he reads the description on the back of the book.

“Stole it from 10th grade English class when I first read it,” you say before picking up another slice.

“Solid,” he laughs, looking at the list of last names written on the front cover along with the year, “Don’t see your name here Sarah.”

“That’s cause I didn’t have a stage name till I auditioned for Black Widow, name’s Y/N, Y/L/N,” you say, pointing to the last name put in the book.

“Oh, well nice to meet you Y/N, do you prefer that over Sarah?”

“Honestly, yeah.”

“Well, Y/N it is.”

You’re silent, you eating your pizza, Tom flipping through your book, laugh at some of the notes you have written in it.

“Cool if I have a piece?” he asks, setting your book down.

“All yours,” you say, gesturing to the pizza box sitting between you.

“So Y/N, how did you enjoy working on the movie? It was your first movie right? Know you beat out some names for the role.”

“Yeah, guess so, don’t know why.”

“Because you were best for the role, obviously.”

“Don’t know why they’d choose a nobody over people like Chloe Grace Moretz,” you shrugged.

“Because you, they saw potential in you, they also love to cast new faces, make newer actors famous,” he says.

Your mind starts to race with reasons why they might’ve cast you and you start to doubt your ability as an actress, because you’ve done theatre, been the lead in shows in your town and region but never movies or TV shows.

“Hey you know, I think you’re quite talented from the clips we’ve seen in trailers.”

“Uh, thanks,” you say, hand rubbing your neck, why are you so fucking awkward?

“So what kinda dress will you be wearing?”

“Huh?”

“To the premiere, so we can match.”

“Oh yeah, yeah lemme send you a picture of it,” you say. You were wearing a pretty dark red dress with black lace adorning the bodice.

“Sweet I’ll see what I can do about getting a matching tie and stuff.”

“Cool, you know it’s nice of you to uh, be my date,” you say, fiddling with your hands.

“Yeah, you know, wanted to see if you’d give me a run of my money.”

“With what?”

“Spoiling stuff.”

“Yeah,” you laugh, “don’t need to worry about that after the movie comes ou- FUCK.”

That definitely wasn’t something he should’ve heard.

You watch as he pieces what you just said together, “oh my god, hey even if that happens, well I think you’ve outdone me.”

“Listen at least I didn’t say that in front of a live audience or something.”

“What am I? A dead audience?”

“No, you’re just one person.”

“Ah that’s right, I don’t count.”

“Nope,” you say, tucking your legs underneath you.

You and Tom hang out and talk about filming, about the movie industry, about your favorite things, it felt like he learned everything about you in the time that you talked.

You stopped yourself a few times, apologizing for rambling.

“It’s fine, like to listen to you talk.”

At some point, you two had set the pizza box on the ground and were lying with your feet swinging off the edge of the bed.

“So, what about you? You excited for what’s to come for Spiderman?”

“Yeah, totally, I mean I want to branch out and do more movies, doing the voice stuff for Onward, the Pixar film; was really cool.”

“Have you done any auditions recently?”

“Some yeah, should hear about them soon.”

“That’s awesome. I honestly don’t know what I’m gonna do after this,” you groan, still unsure why you’re telling Tom any of this.

“Well did you enjoy your time on set? Did you enjoy acting in a film? Enjoy the people you worked with?”

“For the most part yeah,” you say, looking away.

“For the most part? Alright who do you hate? Which actor?”

“No, the actors are all great, I love them. Just, nah it’s stupid,” you sigh, because honestly you had no idea if what happened was weird, if it was out of the ordinary or if that’s just how it was.

“Nothing’s stupid, hey, I might be able to give you a tip to help deal with it.”

“Just, one of the ADs, Jack , he uh, he’d always hug me, like if I did a good job on a scene, he’d just like hug me really tight and uh, like sniff my hair, like press his face right into my hair and like not even ask me if he could hug me which I don’t know, I never stopped him from hugging me I just never hugged back but that’s stupid it’s a stupid thing to have a problem with.”

It’s quiet for a moment and you start to overthink and doubt yourself, doubt why you told him this story. Did Jack make you feel uncomfortable? Yes, absolutely but that’s just how it was, how you figured the industry worked.

“Did he do this in front of everyone?”

“Nah, just on my way back to my trailer or my hotel room or whatever.”

“Does Scarlett know?”

You sit up quickly, looking at him, “no, no she doesn’t. Nobody does it’s stupid I don’t know why I told you.”

“It’s not stupid Y/N, you know, if you want to talk to someone, you should. I can be that person if you want. But if you want you should tell someone higher up, they might be able to do something about it.”

“I don’t, it’s not worth it,” you sigh, laying back down.

“Okay.”

“I’m sorry.”

“What are you sorry for?”

“Talking about this.”

“Don’t be.”

“Yeah?”

“Course, it’s just, I've seen a lot of people, young new people who don’t really have any idea of how this industry works, see them getting taken advantage of, whether it’s by asshole directors who don’t know how to teach young people, treat them like, I don’t know, like they’ve got some power over you.”

“Oh, well thanks I guess.”

There’s a very awkward tension now and you have literally no idea how to move past it.

“So now that you know all about me, what’s there to know about you?”

“Well, got three brothers, Harry and Sam are twins, and Paddy is a little younger than me. Got a dog, Tessa, she’s amazing, truly my favorite being on the planet.”

“God I wish I could have a dog, mom’s allergic.”

“You should meet Tessa sometime, she’s a sweetheart. Mum’s a photographer, dad does a bunch of stuff, comedy, writer, blogs, stuff like that.”

“I’d love that.”

You feel his hand brush against yours, meeting between your bodies.

“Oh, sorry,” he says as he feels your hand stiffen under his.

“No, it's just, why?”

“Why what?” He says as your hand holds his hand tightly.

“Why’d you do this?”

“How many times have I told ya Y/N.”

“Just, dunno why you’d care.”

“Can’t help it, I guess, you’re funny, at least from the interviews of you I’ve seen, and you’ve made me laugh bunch today.”

“Yeah counterbalance all the deep shit I told you.”

He laughs, thumb rubbing the skin of your hand, “see? Anyways, I should get going, supposed to have dinner with my brothers but I’ll see you later? Maybe we can hang out while you’re still in London, if you’re not busy being super famous and with press.”

“Yeah, we can always text too if I am. And I’ll see you at the premiere? You can always just not show up, never talk to me again if you don’t want to,” you say, watching as he gets up.

You follow him to the door and he turns to face you.

“Hmm, good offer but I don’t think I will.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah I think it’ll be much more fun to be your date than ditch you, plus I already know what’s gonna happen in the movie so we can sit and be not surprised together.”

“Sorry I spoiled it for ya,” you say, blushing.

“You’re fine, it was nice to meet you Y/N, I’ll see you later,” he says, you don’t even realize your hand is still in his until he lets go, leaving you alone in your hotel room.

“What is wrong with me?” You groan, jumping back into your bed.

****

You and Tom text throughout the week, a lot actually. Sometimes he’ll ask you random questions about your family, about your favorite place to eat back in your hometown.

You’re in a dressing room, just about to go for an interview when he texts you.

Tom: I love learning all this stuff about you, just wish I could hear you talk about it in person

You: why’s that?

Tom: because, when you’re really passionate about something you talk like really animatedly and it’s really fun to watch

You blush, having no idea how to respond you leave your phone there before making your way to the interview.

****

You’re on your way to the premiere, the flight from London just as long and exhausting as the last. You didn’t have much time when you got to LA to relax, you could put your suitcase in your hotel room and go straight to the premiere where you would spend the rest of your time getting ready. People were doing your hair, makeup, helping you into your dress, it was going to be a whole ordeal. For now, you had an hour to yourself in your dressing room, to relax, to breath, whatever you wanted. Tom let you know he’d be there in two or so hours, he didn’t have as much prep as you had. Basically just had to put on clothes and his hair would take less than half the time yours would.

You were nervous, your first premiere, first red carpet or whatever, your mom wouldn’t be able to make it, she was working, always working, but she sent you her love.

You were laying on the couch in your dressing room, scrolling through your twitter feed when you heard a knock on the door. Maybe it was Tom, you got your hopes up a little. Frowning at your leggings and baggy sweatshirt, you didn’t want him to see you until you were all dressed up.

You reluctantly got off the couch, opening the door.

“Oh hi,” you say, as you see Jack standing in front of you.

“Hi,” He smiles, “Can I come in?”

“What?”

“Just wanted to talk to you, congratulate you,” he says and you reluctantly step back from the door, letting him in. He closes the door behind him and you sit down on the couch, setting your phone on the dressing room table. What you didn’t see or hear was the click of the lock as he locked your door.

“You’re going to be a star Sarah, I can make you great,” he says, sitting next to you. His leg was right against yours and you shift away, body pressed up against the side of the sofa until his leg wasn’t touching yours. You didn’t mind that he called you by your stage name, you preferred it actually. That way everything he said wasn’t really directed to you, at least you could pretend it wasn’t.

“You? Why would you be the one to make you great?” You frown, that’s your job, audition, get your name out there.

“I know people, they’ll cast you, like I convinced them to.”

“Huh?” “Saw something special,” he says, and you freeze when his hand rests on your shoulder, “could’ve cast anyone, any big name, but we chose you.” His hand moves to glide up your neck and cup your cheek and your mind is screaming at you, MOVE, SLAP HIM, RUN but you’ve slipped into panic mode, which for you meant you were frozen.

“Wanna make you Hollywood’s next leading lady,” He says, face so close to yours you can smell his very gross breath, your heart is beating out of your chest.

You’re trying to think of something, anything.

You remember something Tom had told you back in the hotel a week ago.

****

“Just, if he’s weird again, don’t just go along with it, push him away, tell him he’s a fucking coward, he doesn’t get to use his position of power over you.”

“I don’t know if that would work.”

“Just try it, okay? Just, don’t let him hold anything over your head.”

****

His lips are pressing against yours and that’s when you use all your strength, breaking from your panic to push him off you, hard enough that he ends up on the other end of the sofa as you jump up.

“Get up! Get out, now.”

****

Tom wanted to surprise you, so he arrived earlier than he said he would, your wrapped present in one hand, he found out where your dressing room would be and made his way to it, frowning when it was locked.

He was about to knock when he heard you, screaming.

“Get the fuck out!”

“Sarah, don’t do this, you’re going to regret this.”

“No, I won’t, I’ll only regret letting you be a fucking creep for this long.”

You and the AD are in a screaming match.

He tries to doorknob again, wanting to break it up before other people heard.

“Come here,” Tom hears the AD say before you yelp, and there’s a clattering and “I’ll blacklist you, no director will work with you. Fucking ungrateful.”

“If you don’t get out now, I will scream at the top of my lungs and tell everyone what just happened.”

“Bitch.”

****

Jack approached you, “come here.” You backed up into the table as he grabbed your arm tightly, causing you to yelp before he presses his lips hard against yours. Your other hand picks up your phone and your knees connects with his crotch as he let’s go of you and stumbles back before slamming you against the mirror, making you cry out as a sharp pain radiates from your head.

“I’ll blacklist you, no director will work with you. Fucking ungrateful.”

“If you don’t get out now, I will scream at the top of my lungs and tell everyone what just happened.”

“Bitch,” he mutters before unlocking the door, swinging it open.

You whimper, sliding down to the ground and gently touching the back of your head, tears welling up in your eyes as he slams the door shut behind him.

That’s not how you expected this to go down. Your eyes widen when you see a little blood on your fingers.

You vaguely hear a knock on the door but you ignore it, arms wrapped around your knees. What a great way to start your first premiere. You’re laughing as tears stream down your face, something that your mom always said was a bad habit of yours.

***

Tom hears the door unlock and he steps to the side, slipping into the hallway next to your dressing room.

“Fucking bitch, who does she think she is?” Jack mutters as he walks past Tom, not even noticing him.

Tom knocks on the door, hearing you crying hurt him, he hated hearing anyone cry. He heard you laughing, it was a laugh verging on hysterical and decided to go in and check on you, just in case.

***

“Y/N.”

You look up through watery eyes and see Tom standing in your doorway, a red gift bag in his hand, eyes wide.

“Fuck,” you say, head dropping back down as you cry.

He quickly closes the door behind him and kneels down next to you.

“Y/N, I, I heard, I’m so fucking sorry, I shouldn’t have eavesdropped but he’s gone now, are you okay? Shit question of course you’re not okay.”

“I’m fine,” you mumble, trying your hardest to smile up at him.

“You don’t have to smile, Y/N.”

“What?”

“Don’t haveta smile for me, you can cry if you want.”

You sniffle, the tears slowly stopping.

“I’m fine,” you repeat, wincing as the pounding in your head brings you back to reality.

“What’s wrong?” He asks, eyes full of concern.

“Just, hit my head a little, it’s nothing,” you say, your hand instinctively reaching for the back of your head to check if it was still bleeding.

“What the fuck did he do to you?” He asks, seeing the blood on your fingers.

“Just shoved me, it’s nothing.”

“It’s not nothing, you’re bleeding, lemme get someone.”

“No, please Tom,” you say, voice barely above a whisper, pleading with him.

“Why don’t, why are you going to let this slide?”

“Because I can’t, he’s gonna, he’s gonna blacklist me, won’t get even a small cameo in a movie, he’s gonna ruin me.”

“Hey, no, he won’t, because you won’t let him. You stood up for yourself back there, I heard you. You won’t let him take away everything you’ve worked so hard for, and what you’ll continue to work hard for. Hey, let’s get some ice or something, clean up, see if you need to go to the hospital okay? Don’t want you passing out on me on your first premiere.”

“Promise you won’t tell anyone?”

“Not my story to tell, if you want to, when it’s time you can. There’ll be no pressure from me though,” he says as he helps you stand up. Your legs wobble a little bit and you’re afraid you’re going to fall but his arm is a comforting presence on your waist, steadying you. There’s no malintent in his touch as he soothes you, sitting you down on the couch.

You feel safe as he lets go, crouching down to open the small fridge, grabbing some ice from the freezer section.

“Here, turn around,” he says, nonchalantly ripping off a lower section of his shirt to wrap the ice in.

“Wh-,” you start, turning as his fingers sort through your hair.

“Just looks like a scrape, here,” he says, gently pressing his shirt with ice onto the area, hand rubbing your shoulder as you wince.

“Thank you,” you mumble, glancing at the bag he abandoned on the floor, “What’s that? Clothes all fit in there?”

He chuckles, “no, Issa present, for you, for your first premiere.”

“What? My, why's that, you already gave me a present you’re here with me.”

“Yeah but you deserve an actual present, here, hold the ice in place,” he says, palm over the top of your hand, moving it up to rest against the makeshift ice pack.

He reaches down and grabs the bag, pulling what looks like a wrapped book out of it.

“Was gonna give it to you little later but now’s perfect. Go ahead, open it,” he says, putting it on your lap and replacing your hand with his own on the ice pack.

You gently open the wrapping paper and gasp.

“This is, Tom you didn’t-,”

“Do you like it?”

“Of course I do, I mean, this is, wow this is the best gift anyone could have ever gotten me.”

“Well you only have a first premiere once,” he says, searching your eyes.

“I don’t, I don’t know how to thank you.”

“Don’t haveta thank me darling, why don’t we get ready for tonight?”

“Will, do you think we’ll see Jack?”

“He’d be an idiot not to show up, but hey, maybe you won’t run into him.”

“I like the sound of that,” you say, wiping your eyes.

“What did the stylists say they were going to do with your hair?”

“Think it was just gonna be curled, nothing fancy.”

“Okay well when they get here we’ll tell them no curling that part of your head.”

“Well then I’ll just look stupid.”

“Nah, you’ve got plenty of hair to go around up here,” he laughs, fingers running through the hair resting on your shoulder.

***

“Sarah! Tom! Smile for us! Look at you two!”

Photographers are shouting at them from up and down the red carpet, as Tom and Sarah walk, his arm gently resting on her waist, hers around his shoulder.

“You look lovely,” he whispers into your ear as you continue to walk.

“Not as handsome as you.”

He’s been saying nice things, whispering them to you all night, found it was the best way to make you smile, especially after what happened with Jack. You never did see him on the red carpet that night and didn’t bother asking anyone where he might be either.

***

“Wow,” you say, collapsing on the bed of your hotel room next to Tom.

“Fun right?” He asks.

“I mean, I wasn’t expecting such reactions from the crowd.”

“Yeah? Movie premiere crowds are always the rowdiest. But hey, they cheered, they laughed, they cried, you made one hell of a movie.”

“Guess so, I’m proud of it,” you sigh, gently opening the first edition copy of East of Eden, “how did you even find this?”

“I’ve got connections,” he smiles, watching as your eyes scan the first page, so different from your tattered copy from 10th grade.

“My 10th grade English teacher would lose her mind if I told her I had this. Scared to read from it, just wanna put it in a glass case and stare at it.”

“Well, it’s all yours so you can do anything you want with it.”

“Can’t believe this is all happening.”

“What is?”

“Everything, been my dream since I was a kid, to be famous, and well, yeah,” you sigh, not quite finding the words you’re looking for.

“You know, it might be, like, don’t feel obligated to say yes but would you maybe wanna, I don’t know, go on a date? Not now obviously, I think I could fall asleep right here but I’d like to take you out on a proper date.”

“Yeah? I mean the entire world already thinks we’re dating so sure, I don’t think a public date would hurt or help our cause.”

“Great,” you yawn, turning on your side.

“I should go, so you can sleep,” he says, standing up.

“Stay,” you mumble against your pillow.

He doesn’t respond and your heart almost drops, assuming he’s going to leave. Instead, he crawls into the bed, his arm hesitantly resting on your waist, until you scoot so your back is flush against his chest.

“Goodnight,” you whisper, exhaling, for the first time in over a year and a half you truly felt safe and comfortable falling asleep.

#tom holland #tom holland one shot #tom holland oneshot #tom holland x reader #tom holland x reader insert #tom holland reader insert #song fic #tom holland imagine #tom holland fic #tom holland fanfic #tom holland blurb

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typicalfictosexualfangirl · 5 years

Text

dare-out (bnha one-shot; shinso x todoroki x mina x f!reader)

a/n: idk this idea just got into my head and yeah i really wanted to write it, i’m gonna use first person pronoun for the reader bcus that’s how i roll, and don’t question the way i write HAHAHA

summary: four people out to do some dares !!

Shoto, Hitoshi and I were lazing on the couch, just some casual netflix and chill while Mina was taking her own sweet time dolling up.

Well, in actual fact, it was only Hitoshi and I watching Lucifer that was playing on the television as his head laid on my lap.

Shoto was leaning against my shoulder, eyes glued to his phone, probably scrolling through Instagram or something. The three of us had bought him a smartphone his last birthday and yeah, we kinda convinced him to download social media so we could tag him in pictures and create a group chat where we share posts of memes and drop not-so-subtle hints of gifts that we wish someone would get for us.

Shoto adjusted himself on my right, shifting his butt further from me so that he was now lying on my lap too.

I sighed, realising that we have waited for Mina for almost 2 hours. “Babe, are you almost done yet?” I yelled from my place on the sofa, struggling not to move too much and ruining the comfortable positions of my two boyfriends.

“Yes!” she staggered down the stairs.

“Finally,” Hitoshi heaved, sitting up. The three of us turned to look at her, to find out the outfit that had wasted all of our times.

She had on a pale blue long-sleeved crop top that showed off her navel piercing that was of a breathtaking amethyst, a grey skater skirt that stopped mid-thigh, and furry ugg boots.

She spun one round for us to take in her entire outfit, “What do yall think?”

“I think,” I paused for impact, “that did not have to take a full one and a half hour,” I finished my sentence, smirking at her.

She pouted, “Bitch.”

“Now that everyone’s ready, can we go and get some food already?” Hitoshi complained.

“In due time,” I turned to him, pecking him on the lips, “but before that, let’s play a dare game.”

This time, Shoto spoke up, “That doesn’t sound good.”

“Aw, it’ll be fun!”

“Yeah, it does sound fun!” Mina exclaimed, wrapping her arms around me from behind the couch.

“So, we will split into two teams, the ladies versus the gentlemen, and the game will last until dinner time,” I explained the basic rules of the game, “the team that gives in on the most number of dares will have to do the other team a favour, deal?”

Knowing that they can never say ‘no’ to us, both Shoto and Hitoshi sighed in defeat.

“The boys can start,” I suggested, looking up at Mina who gave a nod in agreement.

“Okay, we’ll start with..” Hitoshi trailed of deep in thought, “[Y/N], wash your hands in the toilet bowl,” he smirked at me, the rest of our jaws dropping.

After processing the information, I caught myself and smirked back at him, “Easy.”

The four of us headed to the bathroom as I plunged my hands into the toilet bowl, Mina flushing it for me.

Once I lifted it from the water, I started spraying the water at Hitoshi.

“Oh no, you don’t, get away from me!” Hitoshi screamed as I chased him around the house.

Shoto helped me blocked his way, restraining him with a hug to prevent him from running any further as I happily wiped my hands clean on his shirt.

I thanked Shoto while Hitoshi muttered, upset, “I hate you.”

“I love you too,” Shoto smiled at him.

Mina kept her phone away and spoke up, “Okay, Sho, I dare you to order every single thing on the menu at McDonald’s.”

Shoto grinned at the sound of that, whipping out a credit card from nowhere that was very much Endeavour’s, “I can do that.”

“How has he not terminated that card already?” I questioned.

Shoto shrugged, “Probably because he’s willing to go to great extents to make up to us and patch the family back together.”

“Well, whatever. Let’s all go get some food, I’m starving,” Mina whined, shoving us all out the door.

“Says the one who made us wait for 2 whole hours,” Hitoshi stated, earning him a slap on his upper arm. “Ouch,” he rubbed the spot he was hit.

“Guys, stop the domestic abuse and pick up your pace,” I joked.

“You’re the one who abuses us the most,” both Hitoshi and Mina retorted.

I cowered into Shoto’s side. “Sho, they’re bullying me,” I pouted, causing Shoto to let out a chuckle and he patted my hair.

Buying out the entire menu was certainly a once-in-a-lifetime experience. We ended up having an eating competition, that was a draw between Mina and I, and quite a bit of leftover food that we did not touch.

We decided to pull pranks on people with it by immediately serving the food to them as soon as they told the counter their order. There was also one time where a little boy was tugging on his mother’s sleeve, pestering her about wanting to eat what we had, so Mina just went up and dropped a paper bag in front of them. It was all in good fun.

Shoto turned to Mina, our last paper bag in hand, “You see that group of guys there? Go sit beside them and chat them up while eating their fries.”

“Sure, but if I get beaten up yall gotta stand up for me okay?” she waved us off, stalking towards them.

We watched as Mina hopped onto the chair beside one of the guys, starting up a conversation and casually eating his fries. Every time she reached for the fries, the guy’s eyes would dart from her face, to her hand, to his fries, and back to her face again when she popped the fry into her mouth and slowly chewed on it. He tried to move the packet of fries away from her but she would somehow find her way back to it and eat them again. It was truly a hilarious sight to watch.

It was only when the group stood up, the rage burning in their eyes that we decided to interfere, afraid that a fight would break out. Shoto gave them the bag of free food as compensation for the fries that Mina ate.

“Well, that was intense,” Hitoshi commented as soon as we got out of the fast food restaurant.

Mina agreed, “It was scary and hot at the same time, I’d say I’d never do it again but we all know I will.”

We all burst out laughing.

“I wanna give a dare now!” I exclaimed, raising a hand. “Sho, Toshi,” I turned to both boys, “we can’t be selfish so it’s time for us to share your bodies with your fans.”

The looks of horror on their faces made me laugh out loud again. They sure did not like physical affection, unless it was from either one of us.

I placed my hands on their shoulders, “The two of you shall provide fanservice by giving free hugs at the central plaza.”

“Without your shirts on,” Mina added as soon as I finished.

I nodded at that suggestion. “You two can pass it up if you are prepared to do us ladies a favour!”

It was then that Hitoshi was motivated to not let the dare get to them, “Never.” He dragged Shoto by the hand and headed for the plaza, “Come on, Sho, we’re not gonna lose today. We’re gonna prove them wrong and show them that we can do this.”

At the plaza, Mina and I were seated at the fountain, holding up the signs we had made for the boys to give hugs to the members of the public. It was a heartwarming sight indeed, people of all ages going up and wrapping their arms around them, the genuine smiles on their faces contagious and attracting a whole lot of attention, brightening the day of those that were here to witness this exchange.

“They would be so much more popular if they were more willing to smile in public like that,” Mina whispered in my ear.

I nodded in agreement but I couldn’t imagine it. They have definitely become more expressive ever since the four of us started dating, but my selfish ass kinda not want anyone else to see the expressions they could make.

“Earth to [Y/N]!,” I heard Mina spoke as she wave a hand in front of my face, breaking my reverie.

I shook the thoughts out of my head, “Sorry, I was just thinking about that large group of schoolgirls before.”

This caused a smirk to form on Mina’s face. “Ooh, girl, you jealous or something?” she nudged me in the side.

“I guess,” I muttered, embarrassed.

“But you were the one who dare them to do this,” her voice was accusing, even though that was the absolute fact.

“I know,” I heaved a sigh.

“Aw, babe, you know you don’t have to be,” she wrapped an arm around me and I leaned my head on her shoulder, “you mean so much more to us than we can express, and even if those two idiots were to dump your stupid ass, just know that I’ll always be here,” she comforted me.

I gave her a smile as thanks and she leaned down to kiss me, a reassurance to tell me that she meant every single word she had just said.

Shoto had his hands on his hips and Hitoshi had his above his knees, both of them were panting hard.

“Whoa, you guys seem like you just came back from a workout or something,” Mina commented on their sweaty and disheveled appearances.

After catching his breath, Hitoshi spoke up, “Damn, that was harsh.”

“[Y/N], you alright?” Shoto asked me gently, coming to sit on my other side.

“Yeah, I’m fine.”

“Yeah, other than being jealous of the group of girls back there, she’s good,” Mina explained the situation in my stead.

I shoved her away from me, “Traitor.”

She stuck her tongue out at me in response while Shoto tilted his head slightly in confusion, “But weren’t you the one who suggested we do this?”

“That’s what I said!” Mina huffed.

“That’s why I couldn’t say anything,” my voice was muffled by my hands covering my face.

Hitoshi sat on the now empty spot beside me. “You know there’s no reason for you to,” he pulled me into his side.

“Yeah, to us you’re irreplaceable,” Shoto added, wrapping his arms around my waist and leaning on me, “it was all thanks to you that we are who we are today.”

“That’s what I told her!”

I grinned. If anyone asked me what bliss was, I’d tell them it was this moment, but it was not only that, it was all the moments I shared with them, all the memories we made together. Four people of different personalities, backgrounds and lifestyles coming together, and sharing a house together. Sharing a life together.

“I’m so glad you guys are a part of my life.”

a/n: THIS IS NOT THE END, I WILL BE BACK WITH A CONTINUATION, MORE DARES, AND MORE OF THESE FOUR

#BNHA #SHINSO X TODOROKI X MINA X READER #bnha reader insert #bnha fanfiction #heartsuharu fanfiction

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topimagines · 6 years

Text

Drag Me Down

Summary: when you’re cheated on, what better way to get over it than alcohol and being with your best friends?

A/n: this started as a small scene for future stories, then turned into a request because it was requested, and now i dont even know how to tag it because it sorta turns into a poly fic??? idk, hope you like it

TMZ_TV: Josh Dun, Cheating on his girlfriend? People found the other half of Twenty One Pilots kissing another girl, who was not his girlfriend, y/n y/l/n!

You threw your phone (softly) across the room as the voice continued talking, explaining that he was at a club last night with another girl. And what made your stomach turn, he came home that night and you fucked. It was one of the best orgasms he ever gave you. You wanted to vomit and opted to take a shower instead.

The hot water burned your skin as you scrubbed yourself to get all of him off of you. And in there you had decided that you were done.

With him, her, everyone.

After getting out of the shower, you made quick work of packing up anything that reminded you of him, all the while drowning your taste buds with chardonnay that he had left in the fridge a week ago.

You shoved his toothbrush, his soap, his clothes, his pillows, his blankets, and anything you decided was remotely his, into a box you found deep in the depths of your utility closet. The box got fuller and fuller as you found more of his belongings. After an hour of drinking and packing, you pushed the box out of the apartment onto the stoop, and slammed the door, locking it with the chain and deadbolt.

He probably would not be home for hours, you knew that, and you did not care. Not even if some of his stuff was stolen from the homeless man that often strolled around outside of your building and found a way to get in.

Your head started to ache and you took that as a sign to go to sleep, but you took the time to send your best friend a text.

Before laying in your bed, you dry swallowed a few Tylenol, and poured the rest of your chardonnay in a tall cup. Your phone was promptly put on the charger and the volume down low. After downing the last of your cup of chardonnay, you tucked in for the night. You were out as soon as your head hit the pillow.

There was a loud banging on the door, promptly waking you from your deep lumber. The clock read 5:50 and you groaned, the knocking made your headache worse than it already was.

The knocking did not stop, even after ten minutes of sitting in silence.

Upon opening it, you saw Tyler in all of his glory, hands neatly tucked back into his pants pockets.

"What d'you wan'?" You asked, rubbing your knuckles into your eyes as you waited for his response.

"Josh came over a few hours after you texted me with a box full of his stuff," he pushed past you, into your apartment.

"Yes, please enter," you sarcastically quipped. Tyler did not respond, just rolling his eyes before sitting on your blanket covered couch. (You couldn’t take it knowing he picked it out with you, so you covered it in the biggest blanket you had.) You followed suit, taking a seat on the matching and equally covered chair.

"What happened last night?" He finally broke the silence.

"Did you see the pictures?" You rebutted, waiting for the nod of his head before speaking again, "fucking promised, he did, promised I was the only one he loved, the only one he'd ever love, and promised there was no other girl."

"Are you sure it was him, though, the pictures were a bit dodgy," Tyler didn’t seem to understand why you were reacting so strongly, and maybe it was for the best. He didn’t know your past.

"You don't think I'd recognize my own fucking fiancé?" You quipped, "how did he act when he made to your bloody house? Know for a fact he knew what he did, or he'd be here fighting for himself, not his best friend."

Tyler didn't answer that, the hangnail on his thumb suddenly became more interesting than looking you in the eye, "Look, you're my best friend too and I'm not saying what he did was smart, but maybe you should give him a chance."

"Gave him a fucking chance already, when I moved in with him," you answered, spitting venom with every word, "but he broke my trust after he promised me he would never do just this."

Tyler sighed, knowing it was a lost cause to argue with you, being a stubborn person to begin with, while hungover, you never listened to any kind of reason.

You went to a bar a few hours after Tyler left, drinking away your sorrows. You took shot after shot, not caring in the slightest what it would do to your image.

It was bad enough that you were the girl Josh Dun cheated on.

Eventually, you were so sloshed that you couldn’t tell which way was up, the room began spinning round and round as you danced with strangers. You had met one amazingly beautiful guy and after minutes of flirting, you pulled him to the dance floor.

"This is my song," you exclaimed, pulling him into you.

And although you had fun, the slight pain in your heart from Josh was still there.

So, you found yourself taking your phone out of your pocket as you exited the high-end club (the bouncer knew you from instagram and let you in, no questions asked) and calling the one person you wanted to talk to.

"Y/n? Why are you calling me at three in the morning?"

"I fuckin-g hate you," you hiccupped, "you fu-fucking piece of shit! All I wanted was a nice life with a fucking house and kids, and you ruined it!"

"Are you drunk?" Josh asked through the phone.

"It's not your business what I am anymore," you slurred, and tripped over your heels, slamming into a nearby wall, "Ouchy, I hurt myself." You giggled at your own use of words, repeating it under drunken laughs.

"Where are you, I'm gonna come get you," Josh asked, although it was more of an order than a question. You gave him the address of the club and giggled to yourself when you heard him bump into something on the other side.

You got in the car as soon as josh pulled up, knowing that this was your only shot at getting a ride to your apartment.

"You probably don't want to talk to me, and I understand, but why are you at this club?"

"Makes me feel good, makes me forget, take your pick," you laughed, "take your pick sounds like take your prick."

"Why is that so funny?"

"'cause I'm never gonna take your prick again, never gonna forgive you, either! You're tainted with that slut's juices," you wrinkled your nose, "Don’t ever wan' you to touch me again."

Josh let out a long and deep sigh. You were telling the truth, especially in your drunk state, and he knew that.

"Okay, won't touch you again," he whispered.

You smiled smugly, crossing your arms over your chest as he continued to drive, both of his hands on the wheel, "Good!"

A few months later, after you realized you had a serious problem, you began to pack your bags. You couldn’t stay in the apartment unless you were drunk or high, and you finally started to realize that this was what it feels like to become one of the drunks. Unable to even get through a day without downing a shot or drinking an entire beer. Although you didn’t know where you would go, you could not stay in that apartment any longer. You were in the midst of packing when your phone rang.

"Hey," you answered.

"Hi, babe, how are you holding up?" Sarah's voice sounded through, happy and bubbly as it usually was.

"I'm doing ok, just trying to find storage for my furniture and packing the rest," you had told her the day Tyler had come by, texting her as soon as he left. That was the first time you cried about the situation, tears running down your face and dripping on your phone screen as you typed. Eventually, she came over and held you close so you could cry on her shoulder.

"Well, I have a proposition for you," she said, "I talked to Brendon about your situation and he said you can take out spare room if you want."

"I can't do that, it'd feel like I'm exploiting you guys," you answered. You had thought of asking before, they had an amazing house. Three large bedrooms and a bonus room they set up for Brendon to record in. You had spent many a night there with Sarah, after a few girl's nights with wine and beer included.

Sarah sighed at your stubbornness, "It's not exploiting if I offer, y/n."

Then you heard rustling on the other side of the line, and quiet voices talking back and forth. You made out the words 'is that' and 'let me' and you assumed Brendon wanted to talk with you.

"Hey, sweetheart," his deep voice took over the line, and you couldn’t help but smile at the thought of Brendon stealing the phone from Sarah and running away from her to keep it in his hand.

"Hi, Brendon," you answered.

"Listen, I promise you that it's ok if you stay over here," he insisted, and you heard a grunt in the background of his talking, "I'm sending someone to get your stuff, just be there when he arrives and show him what to pack."

"But Br-"

"No, don't 'but' me, I swear to god," he laughed, "He'll be there in an hour, so you have some stuff to do. Ok, I'll give the phone back, Jesus Christ, Sarah." There was rustling and Sarah's light giggle was heard on the other side.

"We'll see you in a few hours, lovie," she laughed. You both shared goodbyes and you go back to packing for the rest of the day until Zack arrived with a moving van to help you with your stuff, a hug included.

According to Elizabeth Kubler-Ross, you experience five stages of grief. The first being denial, and then anger, followed by bargaining.

You were almost positive that you were past those three stages in the first twenty-four hours. However, the next stage, depression, you weren't so sure.

All you did, the day you got to Sarah and Brendon's house was cry. They were supportive, letting you hug one of them (or both, they weren't picky. They also liked to let you lay in one's lap because they both could brush their fingers through your hair) while you cried into their shirts. Brendon decided at some time that day that he wanted to make sure you were ok in the night and surprised you by crawling into bed next to you, holding you close as you started to sob again.

"It'll be alright, sweetheart, you're going to be alright," he reassured you, stroking your hair lightly as you shook in his arms. Eventually, Sarah came in and slid behind you, stroking your arm to help calm you down. "Do you wanna talk about it?" Brendon asked once you stopped shaking, and your sniffles had subsided. He sat up and put his back against the headboard of the bed and helped you sit up with him, leaning your head on his shoulder.

"I just," you sighed, "I thought he was the one, he was so good to me, made my life so fucking great," you paused, feeling tears coming back, pricking behind your eyes, "he introduced me to everything I love and almost everyone I love, now I can't even look at a fucking drum set the same. He gave me literally everything and then stole it back in a horrible, horrible way. Swiping it right from under me."

"Then we'll just have to replace what he stole," Sarah stated, cupping your cheek and wiping a tear away with her thumb. You nodded against her hand, eyes closing at the gesture.

"Let's get to sleep now," Brendon whispered, slightly touched at the display of affection between you two, "We've got shit to unpack tomorrow and some stuff to replace."

...part 2?

#brendon urie fanfiction #brendon urie smut #brendon urie #brendon #brendon urie imagine #brendon urie fluff #josh dun #josh dun imagine #josh x reader #josh dun fanfiction #josh dun angst #sarah urie x reader #sarah urie imagine #sarah urie fluff

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