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millieisawriter · 11 days ago

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Oh, baby

arthur morgan x reader

summary: arthur being a sweet baby daddy, even if you aren't as optimistic

wc: 2k

tw: accidental/unwanted pregnancy

all pics taken from pinterest

based on this request

a/n: yeeeehaw finally back from my break

Getting pregnant wasn’t ever something you planned nor wanted to happen. Hooking up with Arthur, you were aware of the possible consequences. Both of you were, but the consequences aren’t something you thought about during the heat of the moment. And now you were living with them. Suffering through them.

Meanwhile Arthur didn’t seem so upset.You supposed you were somewhat lucky he was the one that got you pregnant, he wasn’t running off or pretending it wasn’t happening. But his optimism was starting to piss you off. From the day you had told him, he’s been attentive, caring, and a little happier. He wasn’t that grumpy guy the gang had known anymore. Now, he had a reason to be happy, perhaps even to live.

“Brought you somethin’.”

Arthur’s voice cut through the spiraling thoughts in your head as you sat alone by the fire. No bottle nor a cigarette in your hand, as it would’ve usually been. Now you had to be careful.

You looked at Arthur as he sat down beside you on the log. “What’s that?” You muttered as he handed you a small brown paper package.

He shrugged nonchalantly. “Open it and see.”

You frowned, but curiosity got the best of you and your fingers ripped the paper. Inside, there was a blanket. A new one, not stolen. It was neatly folded, soft, and warm. For the baby.

Your stomach twisted. The moment your fingers brushed over the fabric, it all felt even more real. As if it hadn’t already been real enough. And this wasn’t even the first thing Arthur had bought. If things were different, maybe you’d be happy. If you were different. But you weren’t. You didn’t want any of this.

“You keep buying all these things,” you said.

Arthur replied as if that was the most obvious thing. “Somebody has to think ahead.”

“And that somebody is you?”

“Well, I’m the father.”

You scoffed and shoved the blanket back at him. “Yeah, well, I don’t want it.”

“Ain’t for you,” he shot back, his tone softening when he realized he shouldn’t have snapped back so harshly, “it’s for the baby.”

You stood up. It’s been baby this and baby that for the past few months. No wonder it was starting to get on your nerves. “I can’t wait until this,” you gestured at your stomach, “is finally over so I can go get shitfaced.”

Arthur didn’t smirk, knowing it wasn’t a joke. He didn’t even reply, not having the words. He tried, he really tried to help you warm up to the idea. There wasn’t much he could do. He had searched for solutions to make your problem disappear. Doctors had the skills and tools to help you out, but the problem was it wasn’t legal. Doctors were scared of helping ordinary people in that matter, let alone outlaws wanted in many states with bounties bigger than the money you’ve ever made.

“I just… I hate this, Arthur,” you admitted finally, “I hate feeling slow. Weak. I hate the way y’all look at me like I ain’t me no more.”

Arthur stood up as well. Looking down at your face, he saw how glassy your eyes were. You didn’t want to cry, you were fighting it. “Ain’t nobody thinks you’re weak,” Arthur tried to assure you.

You scoffed. “Oh, please, don’t tell me you don’t see it. The way the gang treats me like I’m fragile. Like I ain’t spent the last few years robbing and shooting and killing right beside y’all.”

“Difference is, now you don’t live just for yourself.”

Arthur paused, and so did you. An uncomfortable silence settled between the two of you. The kind of silence that made the night around you feel overwhelming. You wished you could run, run away from all your problems.

Arthur continued, “I know this ain’t what you wanted. I know you’re scared—”

“I ain’t scared.”

But you knew he was right. You were scared, you had no idea how to be a mother. This had never been in the cards for you. You were an outlaw first, a woman second. And now, you were going to be a mother first.

Arthur let out a breath slowly. “Ain’t a crime to be scared,” he said, “hell, I’m scared too. But we can deal with this, you have me. Me and everyone else in this gang.”

“I don’t know how to do this, Arthur,” you muttered, your voice low.“I don’t wanna do this. I ain’t no mother material, and you ain’t exactly cut out to be a father either.”

Well, that hurt, but you had no idea about his past, about Isaac. The day Isaac and Eliza died, Arthur promised to himself that if he gets another chance, he’ll do better. And maybe you were his another chance.

“I tried,” Arthur sat back down on the log, his elbows on his knees as he stared into the dying fire, “tried to find someone, a doc, a midwife, someone who could help you. Ain’t no one who’d do it, not for us. Not for you. They’re scared to do it for normal folk, we can’t even dream of it.”

You opened your mouth to say something, but then closed it without a word. You swallowed, despite your mouth being suddenly dry. There really was no way out.

You sat down next to Arthur, closer than ever, so close your legs touched. The thing that really got to you was that he had tried. That he had gone looking, knowing well that helping you meant getting rid of something he clearly wanted to keep. Something that was important to him.

“Why?” You asked suddenly.

Arthur turned to look at you. “Why what?”

“Why did you try to help me?”

“Cause I care about you.”

Your throat tightened, and you hated it. You weren’t supposed to cry. Not over this. Not over him.

He continued. “I ain’t gonna pretend I don’t want this kid. I do. But I ain’t the one who’s gotta carry the burden, and I sure as hell ain’t the one who’s gotta go through all this. You are.”

You sniffed and looked away. “Well, ain’t no fixing it now, I guess.”

“No,” the man nodded slowly.

There was silence again, but now just a bit more comfortable. You could hear the soft hum of the night, a distant owl, the fire crackling in front of you, the wind dancing with the leaves. Maybe this wasn’t going to be that bad.

“Now,” Arthur gave your knee a light squeeze as he pushed himself to his feet, “you eaten yet?”

You rolled your eyes. “Of course I have. That thing makes me eat everything in sight.”

Arthur raised an eyebrow at you, his gaze telling you he didn’t exactly believe your words.

You huffed. “Okay. I haven’t.”

“That’s what I thought. Sit here for a moment.”

He turned around to bring you something to eat. Something he got in town, something that wasn’t Pearson’s stew.

And you weren’t going anywhere. You hadn’t moved from your place at the fire for the past few hours. That was how most of your days looked lately. From time to time, someone else would join you, but the more pregnant you were, the more snappy you were. At some point it became easier to leave you alone.

“Eat,” Arthur ordered as he gave you some bread, cheese, and an apple. Then, he reached into his satchel to take out a chocolate bar.

It was a lovely gesture. The food wasn’t some fancy dinner, but not like you expected anything fancy. Fancy isn’t a thing when it comes to any aspect of the outlaw life. The food was simple, but better than whatever was floating in Pearson’s stew.

“Thank you.”

You bit into the bread first, interchangeably taking bites of the cheese. Then, not having fully swallowed the cheese yet, you opened the chocolate and took a few bites. And later on you finished it off with the apple.

You didn’t deserve that kind of understanding. Arthur had wanted this baby. He was probably excited, dreaming about a future you couldn’t bring yourself to imagine. Even if he himself would deny it, you knew he deserved better.

Out of a sudden, you asked, “Why ain’t you mad at me?”

Arthur frowned. “Why would I be mad?”

“Because I don’t want this, and you do. I’ve been a pain in the ass to everyone, you included.”

“You have every right to be like this. Your body isn’t yours anymore. I’d be mad as hell if I were in your shoes.”

Arthur was so understanding it made you nauseous. You wanted to hit him and cuddle into him at the same time.

Then, you felt something. As you threw the apple core into the fire, you felt a weird sensation in your belly. Some shifting, pressing from the inside. Then, a sharp kick.

“What the hell?” You hissed, looking down at the curve of your belly.

Arthur straightened immediately. “What’s wrong?”

“It just kicked me,” your hands went to your stomach, fingers pressing against the spot, feeling the kick again. “You want me to throw you a real punch, little bastard?”

You heard Arthur laugh. His laughter was genuine, probably for the first time ever.

“You wouldn’t be laughing if a baby was trying to kick its way out of your guts, Arthur.” You groaned, rubbing a hand over your belly. Another kick made you jolt slightly. It wasn’t something you were used to, the baby didn’t kick before. “Keep that up and I’ll— ouch!”

Arthur’s laughter died down, and now he was just smiling as he leaned in. He hesitated before saying, “Lemme feel.”

You looked at him with disbelief. “What?”

“The baby. Lemme feel the kicks.”

You sighed, eyeing him for a moment before grabbing his wrist and placing his hand on your belly. His touch was warm, but soft. When you let go of his wrist, his hand practically hovered millimeters above your skin as if he were scared of pressing too hard.

For a second, there was nothing. You were about to tell him to forget it when another kick landed right against his hand. Arthur stilled completely. You could see his face firstly flash with a surprise, which soon switched into a smile. He looked damn near mesmerized.

“Well, I’ll be damned,” he muttered, eyes focused on where his hand rested.

You could see it in his face, how much this meant to him. It was strange, seeing Arthur Morgan like that. He looked younger somehow, hopeful in a way you hadn’t seen the whole time you knew him.

You scoffed, trying to ignore the lump forming in your throat. “Told you. Little shit’s got an attitude already.”

Arthur grinned. “Must take after you.”

You looked at the man as he kept his attention on your stomach. Nobody was arguing, nobody was scheming, nobody was running from the law. Just the two of you sitting there, Arthur’s palm resting against your stomach, feeling the proof of the thing that had turned your whole damn world upside down.

After a while, he finally broke the silence. “You ever think maybe this don’t gotta be as bad as you think?”

You didn’t answer right away, because, yeah, you had thought about it. Not in a hopeful way, not in the way Arthur had, but in a tired, resigned sort of way. You weren’t getting rid of it. You weren’t running from it. Whether you liked it or not, this was happening.

Then, suddenly, all you said was, “We can’t let the baby become like us.” And your voice finally carried a softness that wasn’t there for the past few months.

Arthur smiled, finally pulling his hand away. “We won’t.”

#rdr2 #rdr2 community #rdr2 x reader #red dead redemption 2 #rdr2 fanfic #red dead redemption 2 x reader #arthur morgan x reader #arthur morgan #arthur morgan fanfiction #arthur morgan imagine #arthur morgan rdr2 #red dead redemption 2 fanfiction #red dead redemption 2 imagine

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starryevermore · 1 year ago

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the house of snow (5) ✧ coriolanus snow

the house of snow ✧ a royal coryo au | pinterest board| ao3

pairing: king!coriolanus snow x fem!reader

series summary: the king of panem is in search of a bride. and, for reasons you can never understand, coriolanus snow has set his sights on you. it would never be a happy marriage, you’re sure of that. but none of that matters, because when snow decides he wants something, he will do everything in his power to ensure it is his.

chapter summary: snow does not like the idea of others playing with his toy.

word count: 2,665

series warnings?: 18+ MINORS DNI, royal au, regency au, arranged marriage, rivals to lovers, obsessive!coryo, jealous!coryo, protective!coryo, eventual smut, eventual pregnancy, more tags to be added later

chapter warnings?: jealous!coryo, pet name (petal), not proofread

“How does it feel to be Mrs. Snow?” Clemensia Dovecote asked as one of the maids poured you a cup of tea.

You watched the maid glance at you, curiosity evident in her eyes. Though you trusted your own lady’s maid with much of your thoughts and feelings you thought best to keep hidden from everyone else, you knew that maids in general liked to talk. Or, rather, people liked to talk. You had little doubt that your concerns in marrying Snow had spread throughout the working class. Had it been a mistake to even discuss your feelings, or lack thereof, for Snow with her? Perhaps. But you couldn’t keep silent about it. You had to talk to someone.

“I am hardly Mrs. Snow yet. I am only engaged, Clemmie,” you said.

Livia Cardew reached for your left hand. You allowed her to take it. She examined the ring Snow had placed on your finger with much scrutiny. It was a silver band with leaves snaking up to the center, where the silver was molded into rose petals. At the center of the flower sat a large, glittering diamond. Livia loved jewelry and all the finer things in life. She could appreciate a nice ring more than you could. “With a ring like that? The King is making a statement.”

“That I am his?” you clarified. It took everything in you to not roll your eyes. If Livia thought that you were not pleased with your engagement, it would spread through Panem faster than maids’ gossip. Who knew what Snow would do if that happened. Livia nodded. “I was already well aware of his interest, as was the rest of the ton.”

“Perhaps you should remind Lord Plinth of that, then?” Livia said.

Your brows pinched together. Had she someone found out about how you once argued that you would rather marry Sejanus? Had word somehow spread? You knew Snow would say nary a word about it. At least, you would assume so from how he acted when you only mentioned Sejanus’s name. You tried to think back. Were there any maids or butlers around when you talked to Snow about this? When you talked to your parents? None came to mind, but the mark of a good servant is to not be noticed. (Or so your mother says.) It could be possible that you simply missed them?

You decided to feign ignorance. “Lord Plinth? What do you mean?”

Clemensia laughed. “We all saw how he looked at you while you danced at his mother’s ball! That man looked at you like you were made of diamonds.”

Livia crinkled her nose. “You may as well be, at least compared to him. I can still hardly believe the Former King Ravinstill ever granted that family a title. A dukedom at that! It just wasn’t right.”

You decided to ignore Livia’s ramblings. It was true that the Plinth family did not have the same sort of respect the rest of the ton, who had been born into their titles for generations and generations stretching all the way back to the formation of Panem. It was why your parents were so adamant that you not marry Sejanus. But he was a good, and kind, and gentle man. “No, that cannot be. Lord Plinth is only a friend. He was the one who told me that…” You stumbled on the word. It felt foreign in your mouth. “…my fiancé was interested in courting me. Why would he do that if he would want to marry me himself?”

“Oh, you poor, naïve thing. It’s a wonder you even got this far in your courtship,” Livia teased. “He was hoping that you would swear off the King and marry him. An act of true love, or whatever the fairy tales say.”

Could that be true? Could that be why Snow was so irate at you speaking of Sejanus? But why would Sejanus ever reveal that to Snow? Snow was so possessive. He would hardly let such a slight go by unpunished. And, yet, Sejanus still lived and breathed. Maybe, then, Snow had deduced this all his own, just as Livia and Clemensia had done.

“Well, it hardly matters now. I am engaged now.”

“If the King is as smart as he was at the Academy, he would marry you soon. To dissuade Lord Plinth from arriving with any last minute confessions that might steal you away,” Livia mused.

You looked out the window, where Coriolanus the Cat perched. In the distance, you could see the Royal Carriage being pulled down the road. It was nearly time for your daily luncheon with Snow. Though you would always dine at the palace, he insisted on picking you up from your home. To anyone who knew of the routine, it seemed like such a romantic ordeal. A man so desperate to spend time with his love that he would do the silliest things. To you, it was merely another way for him to attempt to control you.

“That would hardly change anything,” you said. The carriage stopped outside of your home. The coachmen stepped down, then opened the door. Snow stepped out, his eyes immediately seeking yours as he looked up at the window. Despite the distance, you could see the smirk on his face. It made you feel ill.

“Because you are in love?” Clemensia asked.

You wondered if Snow could read lips from so far away as you repeated, “Because I am in love.”

Livia looked out the window as Snow walked up to your home. “Do you think he knows about Lord Plinth?”

You blinked. You were wondering the same yourself. However, you knew that this was a question you would probably never get answered. You hardly could even figure out how to talk to Livia and Clemensia about this. How could you ever bring it up to Snow, with his quick temper? “It has never come up.”

“And why would it? I’m sure they have much more…exciting conversations,” Clemensia said with a grin.

Your heart thumped at the implication. Truthfully, you did not know what happened when a couple were married. Your mother only ever told you that, after the ceremony, the union ended in consummation and that that was where children came from. She always said she would tell you more when you were older, but that day had not yet come. “We…talk about our future together,” you said.

Clemensia’s grin grew, but before she could tease you further on matters you didn’t have a full grasp on, Snow entered the room. “Good morning, Miss Cardew, Miss Dovecote. Good morning, petal,” he said with a charming smile. “What are we talking about today?”

You opened your mouth to answer, ready to say you were discussing your impending nuptials. You knew that would please him enough to put him in a good mood. But Livia beat you to it.

“Lord Plinth’s infatuation with your fiancé.”

Snow’s jaw ticked. For a moment, you wondered if his mask would fall. But he recovered quickly and said in a teasing voice, “Should I be worried?”

“No, they have deluded themselves into thinking he is interested,” you said, careful to not even refer to Sejanus by his last name. “I told them that it would not have mattered even if he was interested because—”

“Because she’s in love,” Clemensia interrupted, elongating the word “love,” making it sing-songy.

A more genuine smile settled on Snow’s face. His eyes flitted to you. “Is that so?”

But, for as much as you were attempting to placate him, you had to have your fun, too. So, you smiled, and said, “Oh? We were talking about you? My mistake, I thought we were talking about Coriolanus.”

You picked the kitten from his perch on the windowsill, pressing kisses around his face. He purred, curling up in your arms. For a moment, you thought you saw Coriolanus the Cat look smugly at Snow. But, even if he hadn’t, the annoyed look on Snow’s face was joy enough.

“She teases me too much with that cat—”

“—our son—”

“—our son,” Snow corrected. “I almost regret giving her the little thing.”

Clemensia laughed and nudged Livia. “They already argue like they’re married.”

“Well, as lovely as this was, we do have a luncheon to attend,” Snow said, holding his hand out for you to take. You moved to cradle Coriolanus the Cat in one arm and slipped your hand into Snow’s. He helped you to your feet, then flashed another smile at Livia and Clemensia. “And do let me know if you have anymore theories about Lord Plinth’s affections. I have to ensure I do not have any competition, don’t I?”

“Oh, stop being silly,” you protested as Livia and Clemensia nodded.

At that, your mother, who sat quietly in the corner of the room with her sewing, rose from her seat and followed you and Snow out of the home. Since the engagement, she had hardly spoken a word when he was around. A part of you wondered if that was because she no longer felt the need to quiet you since Snow put a ring on your finger. Another part of you wondered if Snow had included her silence in the terms of the engagement. You would, after all, need a chaperone with you until you were actually married, but that did not mean that Snow would want to listen to her protest over every thing you did.

When you reached the carriage outside, Snow helped you climb in. For a second, you wondered if he was going to ignore your mother. But then he held a hand out for her to take as she lifted herself inside, taking the seat across from you. She had learned after the first luncheon that the spot beside you was to always be occupied by Snow.

Once Snow took his seat, the carriage began its trek to the palace. You tried to distract yourself, looking out the window and petting Coriolanus the Cat, who was curled up on your lap. But then Snow reached for your hand, which you allowed him to take. From the corner of your eye, you saw your mother wrinkle her nose. You weren’t sure it was inappropriate for him to hold your hand, but perhaps she knew so archaic social rule you were unaware of. Or perhaps she was regretting her scheming, you mused.

“I do not want you to spend any more time with Sejanus,” Snow said.

This got your attention.

You turned to look at him, your brows pinched together. “Because of what was said this morning? Lord…he is a friend.”

“I believe Miss Cardew and Miss Dovecote were correct in their assessment. I do not wish for you to be around him.” At your frown, he added, “At least not until after the wedding. It will only be a month. Give me this.”

“I have given you so much already.”

Snow squeezed your hand, tight. You tried to pull away, but he refused to loosen his grip. He leaned in to you, his breath fanning over your face. You did not like how close he was to you. “I cannot tell if his intentions are pure. I do not wish for you to be harmed.”

“Sejanus would never,” left your lips before you could think of what you were saying.

Snow’s face turned red. “What did I tell you about—”

“He is a friend, Snow. He. Is. A. Friend. You cannot isolate me from my friends—”

“—not your friends. Only him.”

“—just because you have concocted this delusion he is trying to take me from you. Sejanus may act impulsively from time to time, yes. He may not always think matters through. But he is your friend, and he is mine. Do you understand? As far as he is concerned, we are in love. Even if he had been interested in courting me, he would not do anything to hurt either of us. He is not like you.”

“Not like…You are toeing the line, petal.”

“I am not going to stop talking to a friend, even if it is only until we are married, because you are insecure. Snow, have I given you any reason to think that I would not follow our agreement?”

“No.”

“Have I done anything, save for admitting that I once considered marrying Sejanus, that would indicate I have feelings for him?”

“You have not.”

“Then why are you acting like a petulant child whose favorite toy has been stolen away?”

You watched as Snow’s jaw clenched and unclenched. But before he could say any more, the carriage came to a halt and the door was opened. Your mother was helped out first, then you, and finally Snow. He said not a single word as the three of you were led into the palace toward the dining room. Not until you had passed Coriolanus the Cat off to the butler.

“Join me in the library for a moment, petal,” he said.

You caught your mother’s eye. Oh, how you wished for her to say something. But instead, she took her seat at the table and said not a word. Sucking in a breath, you nodded. Snow smiled and took your hand, placing it around his bicep. You had half a mind to dig your nails into his arm, hoping that it might hurt him. You were already walking on thin ice, and you could not imagine such an act would go over well with Snow.

When you entered the library, Snow shut the large, oak doors behind you. Your blood ran cold. He had not done that the last time you visited the library. Had you crossed the line? Had you gone too far? You were not sure if Snow was a violent man. He had spent some months after leaving the Academy as a Peacekeeper. He was certainly capable of violence. But would he inflict it? On you?

“Snow, I did not mean to—” you began to apologize, hoping that it might placate him.

If you thought Snow had been too close to you before, it hardly compared to him grabbing you, one hand on your waist, the other on your face, his lips pressed against yours. You gasped, trying to pull away. This was not right. This was not…You were not even sure if married couples kissed this way. You had only ever seen chaste kisses, never something so…animalistic. You weren’t sure if Snow was kissing you more than he was trying to eat you alive. When his tongue darted out, swiping against your lips, you finally managed to push him away.

“What the hell was that!?” you shouted. “You cannot just, just kiss someone! We are not married, Snow! You promised that you would not ruin me!”

“Did I? I only recall saying your reputation would never be harmed.” Snow reached for you again. You could not find it in you to push him away, not when he had such a crazed look in his eye. “And it will not be, I will promise you that. If I wish, however, to kiss my fiancée in private, I shall do so.”

“You only did this so I would feel guilty if I tried to leave you for Sejanus, which I have already told I would not do!”

“No,” Snow said. “I did this because you drive me mad.”

“Then lock yourself in an asylum. Do not kiss me.”

One of Snow’s hands left your waist. He reached up, caressing your face. When you did jerk away, he pinched your chin between his fingers. “You are to be my wife. You are to be the wife of a king. I shall treat you however I see fit. Do you understand?”

When you said nothing, he pinched harder. “Do you understand?”

“Only if you understand that I will hate you until the day I die.”

#the house of snow: a royal coryo au #coriolanus snow imagine #coriolanus snow x reader #coriolanus snow x fem!reader #coriolanus snow x female reader #coriolanus snow x y/n #coriolanus snow x you #coriolanus snow fanfiction #coriolanus snow fan fiction #coriolanus snow fan fic #coriolanus snow fanfic #coriolanus snow fic #starrywrites #starryevermore

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neptunesailing · 8 months ago

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PING JUMPSCARE anyway your art is amazing i love your new hiiai piece please talk about the design more if you want, i love hearing people yap about their design elements and the process to get to the final idea. (also, i really like ghosty sorta things and this certainly feels pretty ethereal! did you have a story idea behind it that perhaps i caught upon?)

HII THANK YOUUU!!!!! IM GRINNING LIKE A MANIAC RN DONT MIND MEEE teehee but YEYSSYEYSEYSEYYSE tysm for asking abotu the designnnn augh i loooove designing things its so fun to me!!! putting this under a cut because WOW i went crazy

i had a Vision for this design it was (as i put it to a friend) a "drowned love-struck sailor but also a guy that seems like he Lives at the beach but he's so ethereal you SWEAR he's a mermaid or something". like sirens and sailors but more emphasis on the sailor part

here's my moodboard/reference board!! i knew i wanted puffy sleeves and super flowy fabric but i wasn't sure what Else to add so i went to pinterest (of course) and saw like the fishnets and the pearls and ya i went insane. i didnt end up adding any pearls or as many ruffles in the final design but i think the whole beach/ocean aesthetic got across pretty well!!

for colors: the only thing i had in my head was WHITE FLOWY SHIRT because i love drawing them and it just Fits the vibe i was going for. the blue gradient on the sleeves makes me think of drowning? like being in the ocean for so long that blue is just a Part of you now even though that doesn't really happen its the VIBE of it okay. being engulfed by blue being engulfed by the sea nd you're drowning..... aughh. also the collar is a type of scallop collar because i wanted it to be different from a normal white button-up okay. a lot of my design process is Is This Cool and How Can This Be "Functional" (either in design [adding color or shape] or use [actual function])

there's also the long sash for more color and more flowy action!! and those pants are also supposed to be loose and flowy you just. dont see them in the final piece lol.

another thing about the colors: i tried to contrast from the blues i was putting in the sleeves and the sash with the warm browns that you can see in the net shirt and the ribbons on the sleeves and the net-like accessory on the left leg and the addition of nets Really adds to the whole theme that Deep Into You has going on of being "drawn in to the point of drowning" and the whole sailor thing too

couple notes: the net shirt would be like a tank top and i originally was thinking of having sandals for the shoe choice instead of what i have now and honestly now that im thinking about it again sandals Would be cool. but for an enstars outfit that they have to dance in? those shoes are fine actually

about the jewelry: i added the star clip a little late but it's supposed to act as a larger version of a tie clip? or like a brooch but with More stuff on it. also YES the earrings are mussel shells (i didn't know it was a mussel shell when i drew it i was referencing just a shell i had on hand) but aughh like mussel shells have so many pretty colors in them theyre like iridescent and i wasn't able to put that much detail in them at such a scale which is sad but its ok i think it still turned out really beautiful... i should draw shells more.

anyway thank you so much for sending this ask!! i dont really have much of a story behind this other than listening to the one minute clip we have of deep into you on loop for actual hours over the course of three(?) days but i might make a story.... ive been thinking about it... hope this is actually readable i wrote so much hahah but yes i am crazy and i love yapping about my design process and choices <3

#nep rambles #nep answers #i Really should be doing something else right now but nope. also i saw this ask immediately and decided to drop everything to answer it so.#outfit design

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reflections-in-a-critical-eye · 1 year ago

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Another day/week/hour of accumulating thoughts which haven't marinated enough.

That Zzinu guy (I can't remember his actual name) is really hanging out with everyone relevant in the industry, he's everywhere 👀 I saw him with RM on IG and at some concert, had no idea they were buddies.

Why did Jungkook come back just for a few days? What was that damn urgent to fly to Seoul only to go back to US in no time? I thought someone would enlist, but nope.

I took the bus downtown twice today instead of calling for a car. I have to stop being delusional and accept that I'm not rich.

I'm not gonna write a review of Tedros' album cause I don't feel there's a point, but I do have like a few things to say. Why is it being talked about like he started working on Layover 3 years ago? I mean, he started working on music, yes, but this thing that came out? That's like some team who probably put together the music a lot more recently. But hey, I'm just babbling so what the fuck do I know? Slow Dancing sounds good. I mean, nice enough to have it in the background in a playlist. All the songs feel too short, like they're some samples and they just decided to release them that way. Since his contribution was mostly singing the actual songs, it feels like he gave Min Hee Jin a pinterest board of who is Taehyung and from that entire thing, she created the Kim Taehyung artiste aesthetic. It's her vibe all over it. Just as it's her entire shtick all over NewJeans. It screams more MHJ than the actual idols.

I tried so hard in the past 30 min to stop myself from being bitchy, but I can't help it. To those who think that they got out of the jikook cult and now they're smarter and feel the need to still use the tag to post their bullshit? Wake up, you're still in a cult, you just switched to another. Absolutely pathetic. I wish I could fuck with pjms cause I admire the way they stand up for Jimin and they're like the most organized fanbase. But the moment they started using cult/tkkr narative and making Jimin sound like a puppet, I just knew they're not better. And a sign that I cannot affiliate myself to any group in this fandom, I'm riding on my own like I always have.

You know what's ironic though? Jikookers are basically the only ship fandom within bts who since the beginning and especially in the latest years, should have just sat back and relax cause they're so damn privileged. No other pair in bts is giving what dumb and dumber (I call them that with all my love) are doing together, but there's not a day in which I don't see stupid anons or jikookers fighting and bringing arguments. Waste of time!

And in that vein, pjms would only have to learn from their god damn classy bias who is no doormat and act accordingly. Fight for him without acting so damn stupid. In terms of artistry, he's the best out there out of this group and others in his generation. Isn't that fucking cool? And look at his behavior. Let army and kpop stans get frustrated thanks to Jimin's achievements and how you can contribute to that, not using the same foul language which only trashy stans are using. Do better ffs. Fix that attitude. And stop believing you know Jimin's brain and soul inside out. No one does. It only makes you sound like any other delusional kpop stan.

Key's Good & Great is out. I only had time to watch the mv once during actual work hours (fitting) and I can't get into anh details, but I liked the idea of workaholism tied to a simulation. There's tons of layers and stuff to be analyzed there, perhaps some other time.

#m thoughts #also I do not need harassment and informants going around and spreading stuff based on what I write #these are literally opinions #not universal truths that I impose forceably #leave me alone #do I have to repeat every single time that it's not that serious?#I don't care about others #but it's not for me #the minute I press post and leave the app #my mind is somewhere else #chill #do I have to give a warning every single time?#no I don't hate Tae #no I don't hate x and y member #no I don't hate everyome #at least on twitter people have more balls #that's the difference here #we're chicken shits on tumblr

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cinnamcnroll · 30 days ago

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⌜bella maclean. twenty nine. cis woman. she/her.⌟ ╱ was that WILLA HOFFMAN i just saw wandering around lake stillwater ? you know the THE INNOCENT? odd … i never imagined they’d be back in town, especially after everything that happened last time. but i guess it makes sense, considering they've always been known for being ANALYTICAL and OPTIMISTIC. still, you'd think they'd be more cautious—especially since they’re also quite INSECURE and FLAKY, but then again that explains, her extensive yarn collection for crocheting amigurumi for her patients. last i heard they were working as a/an PEDIATRIC NURSE in NASHVILLE, TENNESSEE… i wonder if that's where they picked up that SILVER CHARM BRACELET they're always carrying around. nonetheless, with whatever happened on that lake all those years ago, they'd better hope the cabin keeps them safe this time around. ⌜pinterest. playlist.⌟

BASICS

Name: Willa Hoffman

Nickname(s): Will, Wills

Faceclaim: Bella Maclean

Birth Date: March 11th, 1995

Zodiac: Pisces

Age: 29 years old

Gender, Pronouns: Cis Female, she/her

Sexual Orientation: heterosexual (or so she thinks? she's only had her bf), demiromantic

Relationship Status: in a long term relationship (for how long tho?)

Occupation: Pediatric Nurse

Residence: Nashville, Tennessee

Reference Characters: Shelly Johnson (twin peaks), Willow Rosenberg (buffy the vampire slayer, season one), Jane Bennett (pride & prejudice), Jenna Rink (13 going on 30)

HISTORY {TW: MENTION OF CHILD NEGLECT, DEATH & BLOOD}

one. willa hoffman was born to a single mother but was raised by her grandmother. the three women lived in a small house together in minnesota, but often it felt like it was just willa and her nana. her mother's only form of validation and accomplishment in life seemed to be from whatever romantic relationship she had at the time, often leading willa to feel as though she wasn't important enough to be loved, nurtured, and cared for. if not for her grandmother practically raising her in her mother's absence, willa often suspects her life would have turned out worse. two. one thing her nana always told her was that she was smart, and that her compassion towards others could help change the world one day. at a family function during her tween years someone has suggested she consider nursing as a career and in that moment it felt like something clicked. ever since that moment willa spent most of her time in school making sure to keep her grades high and her interests expansive in hopes of getting into a good college with a good nursing program. her goals left her with a lacking social life in high school, which she vowed to make up for in college. three. she entered college with a bright eyes, a soft smile and desperate need to find a place she belonged. thankfully, her freshman roommate seemed to notice willa's needs early on - always the mom friend - and never had a second thought about including her in her plans. if willa hadn't been assigned to room with harper she is certain she wouldn't have wiggled her way into the friend group. perhaps, it could have happened through her connection with jamie, after all tutoring him did mean they spent a lot of time together. but it didn't mean he had to include her in his after hour plans. but the mutual connection in harper seemed to help welcome her into jamie's life and friend group even quicker. four. when the idea of going away for a weekend to a cabin to celebrate the end of finals was posed, willa was thrilled to be invited. not only was she ready to have a much needed break and stress reliever, but to be included in the group had her finally feeling as though she had somewhere she belonged. that she found her people. but the weekend ended in a travesty, and the death of jamie seemed to flip the whole group on their head. the idea of him drowning in the lake seemed plausible, until she saw all the blood. and from that moment on there was a nagging noise in the back of her mind. "someone did this." five. it's been ten years and willa doesn't speak to the old college gang as much as she hoped she would. she's moved to nashville with her long term boyfriend - his goal of brewing and selling craft beer has led them here - and spends most of her time working long hours at the hospital. things have started to shift with her boyfriend in the past few years (her therapist claims she is pre-disposed to becoming victims of narcissist's due to her upbringing) and she's starting to realize she is not as happy as she once was. when harper's death reached her ears, and her final request was made known, willa knew she needed to return to stillwater and help lay her friends to rest for good.

CHARACTER TRAITS

Positive: analytical, optimistic, compassionate, gentle Negative: insecure, flaky, overly trusting, docile

HEADCANONS

willa wears a silver charm braclet on her right wrist and almost never takes it off. it was a gift from her grandmother when she graduated college and it's one of her most cherished possessions.

her love language is acts of service and words of affirmation. probably got everyone very specific and well thought out gifts for every one of their birthdays and christmas.

there was a point in time where willa thought she wanted to work in the ER, but after actually doing it, quickly decided that wasn't her cup of tea. eventually she made her way to pediatrics, and absolutely loves it.

willa tried being vegan for a while in college but it ultimately did not stick. she has since become a pescatarian, something her boyfriend frequently criticizes.

crocheting was a project she took up as a way to spend less time on her phone when rotting away on her couch, and she has found she deeply loves the sense of accomplishment she feels after completing a project. it has also become a way for her to decompress after a long day at work.

willa does not have contact with her mother, but she still checks in on her grandmother weekly. she secretly hopes to move back home to minnesota sometime soon and become a partial caregiver to her nana.

CONNECTIONS

jamie novak. the hype man. {+}. jamie was never one to ignore someone, or make them feel left out. it was a trait that willa desperately admired. regardless of the situation you were in, jamie always knew what to say to lift your spirits and make you feel like you belong. there were plenty of times in college when willa was upset and one charming smile or well placed joke by jamie had her entire day feeling brighter. while their relationship started out as tutor and student, they ended as friends.

harper chen. the college roommate. {+}. willa and harper were randomly assigned roommates their freshman year and often willa claims that was the moment her life changed. she knows she would not have made the friends or most of the memories she has today if it weren't for harper noticing a lost girl looking for someone to show her the way. and harper took willa's hand and squeezed it tightly.

anthony bready (npc). the narcissistic. (+/-}. anthony and willa met in college during a humanities class. they partnered up for a project and have been inseparable since. however, willa has lost a number of connections because, well, a lot of people don't like anthony. he can be an ass, only talk about himself and what he's doing, and often put down or dismiss willa's interests. she would never listen to her friends negative opinions of him in the past, but she's slowly starting to recognize his faults. and they seem to be growing. he's gotten more controlling since moving to nashville, even trying to convince her not to go join her old friends in stillwater because he wasn't invited.

isa morgan. the protector. {+}. willa has a tendency to make herself small in order to fit into a room or lift others up. this person always noticed willa's people pleasing ways and tried their best to not only look out for her, but be her voice when her own wasn't strong enough. willa always knows this person will be by her side and help her through difficult or uncomfortable situations.

connor acosta. the unlikely friend. {+}. you would never look at willa and hunter and expect any sort of genuine friendship to exist between the two, mostly because their personalities are so different. but due to their respective relationships with harper, the two were often around each other in college and formed a surprising friendship.

julian koenig. the friends boyfriend. {+/-}. julian is another connection willa made through harper. he was harper's boyfriend in college and was always around their shared space. willa's feelings towards julian were pretty neutral, often mirroring that of whatever harper was feeling at the time. if they were doing well, willa was a big fan of his. if they were fighting, willa was pissed for her friend. ultimately they stopped talking after he and harper broke up, and have not kept in contact since college.

eleanore koenig. the old roommate. {-}. these two became close during their college years and after graduating decided to move in together. everything was great for the first year, but after that things became more difficult. primarily, willa’s boyfriend began to hang around more frequently and seemed to have a lot of opinions. eventually distance grew between willa and nora, and willa ultimately screwed nora over when she broke the lease to move to nashville with anthony.

arlo clark. the one who kept in touch. {+}. arlo is the only person willa has kept in touch with since moving out to nashville. they talk on the phone at least once or twice a week and have often sought out relationship advice from each other. they don’t get together in person too frequently (willa blame’s it on her jobs, which isn’t totally untrue) so the prospect of spending time together in stillwater is incredibly exciting. they are also the person who told willa about harper’s death.

miki aikawa. the girl who has everything. {+/-}. miki and willa were assigned to be partner's during a random class in college, and willa was quickly irritated with how miki performed (although she never said anything to her). years later, the irritation willa felt has morphed into a kind of envy as she watched miki travel the world online and live the kind of life willa only dreams of. miki seems to have it all, the confidence, the fun and the beauty that willa often feels she could never compare to someone like miki.

camille lawson. the reflection {+/-}. willa and camille never spoke much in the past. both women could feel a sense of similarity between them, and instead of that being something that bonded them, it instead left them with an uncomfortable feeling of looking at themselves in a mirror.

poppy mcguinness. the college best friend {+/-}. poppy and willa were immedately drawn to each other in college and quickly became close, if not best, friends. but once they graduated and due to external circumstances (willa's boyfriend and poppy's grief), distance grew between the two. they haven't spoken since college.

WANTED CONNECTIONS

right person, wrong time. {+/-}. these two were always flirting around each other in college, but nothing ever happened. and when willa started dating anthony, it seemed like all connection between the two stopped. having not spoken in years, now that they're together again and sharing a cabin, neither can deny the fact that those old feelings are coming to the surface. and willa is becoming painfully aware of how unhappy she is in her current relationship.

#{i hosted parties and starved my body like i'd be saved by a perfect kiss || intro}#sw.intro

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finitevoid · 1 month ago

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07/2020

looking at pictures of the city at night makes my mouth taste like danger and my vision swim with the static feeling of the past. cigarette smoke makes my eyes water and clogs up my sinuses with hazy, half-formed memories of better days.

I’m leaving for college soon, and I’m leaving my dog behind. everyone says it’s for the best, but I still can’t help but feel a little bad. he’s a mean thing, jumpy and violent when provoked, and the only person he really likes is me.

I think, when he met me, he could smell the past on me. wafting off of me like the stink of a joint, filling him with understanding. I was the only person he would let put a collar on him. to this day, I have no idea why he tolerated it, why he didn’t bolt like he did with everyone else; perhaps he could smell the suffering I labored to keep underneath my skin. I wonder if it smelled like sex.

but, when I put the collar on him, my hands were gentle. and I coaxed him into believing others’ hands were gentle, too, and he let them put the collar on him, too.

lately, though, like he can sense a heaviness in the air, he presses his neck to the wall when I try to clip the thing on. not afraid but stubborn and rooted nonetheless. I have to force him into it, gently prying him toward me to loop the collar around his neck, and the action makes my mouth taste like cotton.

distantly, I wonder if this is how he felt when he saw me, freshly broken and full of hot rage and not enough tears to quell the hatred in my heart.

I kiss the top of my dog’s head and he noses at my chin and I wonder if this was how she felt when she first saw me, stare a thousand-miles long and mouth so stiff with cold that I could barely move it to speak. I hold my dog a little tighter. I wonder.

I wonder if I still smell like suffering, to him.

01/2025

Five years later and I don't spend my days scrolling through the wet cityscapes that Pinterest shows me, anymore. Instead, I weave my fingers together like chain-links on a fence, and I hum to myself in the melody of the future.

My dog knows not to expect me for long. I come home in a flurry of chaos and excitement, and he spends a-month-and-change splayed out on my lap, warm and content, with my hand buried in his soft fur.

And I say, you want a walk? And he prances across the smooth wood floor to the door, wiggling, tongue lolling. He still flinches when I come at him with the leash a hair too fast; but with a soothing touch, and a calm word, the excitement at the prospect of a walk becomes far more important than his remembered fear.

He whines when I stay downstairs too long, and he yips when he wants me to play chase, and I laugh and I run until his old bones get worn out. And then we sit, breathing in tandem, and he presses his little face into the soft pouch of my stomach, and he hides from the world in the darkness of my safe embrace.

And it's funny. Because the smell of suffering and sex and fear must be so far away from all of this; my coarse hands are clean of blood, my own or otherwise. He gnaws playfully at my fingers like a puppy, and he is losing his teeth as he gets old, and he has no idea the kind of pain that used to be etched into my heartlines.

Or maybe he does, but it doesn't matter anymore; it's just me and him, and we are content, and there are no monsters here, not even in our dreams.

He still flinches when the doors slam and he barks when there are strangers in the house. And I still simper and smile when I shouldn't, and I still shake late into the night, not making eye contact with the shadows in the corners of my bedroom,

but mostly, I've forgotten what suffering smells like. Mostly, I sit with my face tilted towards the sun, and I remember that people are gentle.

#july of 2020 vs jan of 2025 #reading this poem back over #i decided it needed a response #a reply #an addendum #i still struggle and i always will #but it will never be that bad again #its easy to forget that when things are hard #and things are hard right now #my writing*

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lobotomydaughter · 1 year ago

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!!!!!!!! stephcass arachne!!!!!! pls tell me more 👀👀

(and the perpollo fic!! would it perhaps be the one where percy works in a museum and accidentally releases apollo from his statue? i think i read it last year ish def need to re-read bc i forgot??? all of it and it was very good)

yess that's the perpollo fic!! it was such an enjoyable read.

okay so for the stephcass fic it's like. arachne myth adjacent. so the basic premise is a gothic retelling where it was cass' ancestor who was cursed and turned into a spider creature.

so cass is like this human-spider hybrid thing but in a delightful monster way. thinking this for the general vibes of cass:

hi, hello, hey

(pinterest links!)

enter my girl, stephanie brown.

stephanie is not from high society like cass and her countess' mother. instead, steph is just barely getting by as a tailor's apprentice. though shiva and cass are sort of recluses due to their shared affliction, the silk they can make is very valued.

i'm also reading up on shibari bc... hello webbing is right there but also for fashion bc i saw this image.

smth like this for cass perhaps but uh, more coverage. i really love the idea of her leaning into the whole spider thing and just running with the motif like how lucille is associated with moths in crimson peak. just. spiders and webbing everywhere. like! look at this and this.

i am not. super set on a plot direction bc mostly i just want to write smth gothic and magical and sapphic. just two gals falling in love <3

but no gothic romance would be complete without the threat of violence and fear of death that's just standard for the genre sooooo i know in one version of the arachne myth, she and her brother both were turned and it was said that their offspring would kill them which is really interesting esp in combo with cass' issues with murder.

soooo with that said possibly as cass ages she is combating more and more thoughts of violence towards her mother. did you know spiders will eat other spiders? (plus it would tie into the whole shiva training cass thing if shiva expects and wants her daughter to kill her when the time comes, like she did to her mother)

perhaps the only time cass doesn't have those thoughts is when she's with steph. which is such a cliché but i happen to like clichés a lot.

i don't know. is this anything??

#i just love gothic lit but very little of this would be. period accurate i just want the vibes without any set time frame #stephcass #waffleinator-inator #replies

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chris-continues · 2 years ago

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College AU Thoughts (cont.)

Writing more college au solely because ONE OF THE COOLEST PPL EVER @macncherries did Wolfwood art (here check it out), but have some more random college au thoughts

TAGS: @lune010 @h4venpha @vashfantasy

-Meryl probably has some really nice gel, ballpoint, colored pens that she literally abuses all the time. Sometimes her notes aren’t even totally neat she’s just sleep deprived and highlighting/underlining the important areas of her textbook as she listens to her lecture

-Vash definitely has to listen to audio playback of lectures- does he try to take notes in class? Yeah. But they look like chicken scratch, his handwriting pales in comparison to literally anyone else’s T<T listening while he does smth else really helps w/ how he learns (autistic vash) (cough)

-Meryl and Milly have matching pairs of rip-off Birkenstocks they found at like Marshall’s then saw a pair w a marijuana leaf and Milly went, “Reminds me of Wolfwood!” So they got it (to Meryl’s amusement and dismay). Wolfwood wears them often

-Ok, I’ve been debating on this hc that Vash sometimes gets invited to parties, considering he’s a bit of a campus celeb. Handsome, athletic (tennis player legend), but he can easily get overwhelmed. He’s having fun with the fame for like a good 30 minutes to an hour and then he just kinda tires out more as the night drags on.

-Meryl’s outfits consist of her wanting comfort yet maintaining her usual feminine flair. Yoga pants with a cami and a simple jacket, or on nicer days more of a fitted sweater. Perhaps a jumper and a baby tee/turtleneck underneath- I think when she’s feeling it she def likes Monica Helper’s looks from Friends. A casual, yet still sweet vibe.

-for accessories she probably has an Apple Watch and the staples- hoop earrings, her classic dangle/rectangular earrings, some silver hardware if she’s feelin extra funky and a classic black belt because I do believe she hates it when her jeans are too low it’s a big thing that annoys her to no end.

-On the other hand, Milly’s outfits are less fitted and I think she’s more laid back in her appearance, preferring some of the crew necks she’s collected from several events her siblings have been to or hand me downs from her country family. She wears vintage athletic wear though, it’s cute on her and it suits her well.

-she has a few simple scrunchies she remains loyal to, not wanting to cut her hair short and often tying it up. When she feels more femme she’s got some cute necklaces that pair well with any cute sweaters she has- she also has some maxi skirts she wears too! :) (can’t find an exact image of what I have in mind + I have a 10 image limit on mobile lol)

-Meryl avidly has to live off of coffee. Girl is always so organized but truthfully she’s half alive due to the fact she’s a frequent visitor at the campus cafe and is familiar w/ some of the baristas who often cut her slack if she ever needs a pick me up.

-Vash is like a crazy good teacher, to some people’s surprise. He can word concepts in a way that breaks them down easier, sometimes he even has some little memory hints he uses lol. For any other ND kid in class who’s a bit bashful they usually flock to him, he’s got such a charming aura and never fails to make anyone feel a bit more comfortable.

-Wolfwood teases Meryl for her aforementioned coffee addiction, but I’d imagine he takes a liking to something like a pink drink. Like- usually that stuff is too sugary for him, but smth about it has him coming back for more!!

-Meryl has an array of podcasts she listens to- I think she def dabbled in true crime maybe?

-Milly and Meryl’s shared dorm is actually really chill. There’s some clutter on each side but they’ve got a shared mini fridge (Meryl got it but doesn’t mind Milly using it because she likes her) it’s stocked with pudding cups

-Milly got Pinterest after Meryl wanted to share ideas for food ideas on weekends (they’re both on a meal plan but still need to eat on Saturdays and Sunday’s lol) so they usually end up going out for some cheap takeout w/ Vash and Wolfwood or make something in a rice cooker they found at a thrift store that works kinda ok… for the price they got it.

-Like they’re cutting up spam, eggs, tossing rice on there, some veggies they got and sometimes they splurge on cheap fruit like bananas and apples

-They both like to eat well and unlike Vash and Wolfwood they won’t live off of instant ramen and takeout (although Vash eats pretty well considering he lives with Nai, who makes sure he regulates his diet due to sports and Vash’s long list of medical concerns)

-Wolfwood eats like shit though I’ll be completely honest

-The guy knows how to shop. But he doesn’t want to. So he lives off of cup noodles and old pizza, takeout and shit, and thanks to crazy fast metabolism he works it off whenever he does some form of working out and whatnot.

-Will agree that he has the best of the best songs, his music taste is unparalleled. Like he’ll be busting it down to 6up 5oh Cop-Out (Pro/Con) by Will Wood from his middle school days then some new metal he’s gotten into (he peeked over Knives’ Spotify playlists) OO OR OR THIS IS LOVE BY AIR TRAFFIC CONTROLLER (I’m def not projecting w/ what’s on my Spotify rn I’m shit at song names I just know vibes)

-Vash likes hyperpop and rave typa stuff it stimulates his brain in just the right way tbh

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theoraclenextdoor · 1 year ago

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what service should you seek with me? pac

banner is from pinterest, pics are mine, dividers from @/saradika

What reading do I think you should get with me? This pick a pile doesn’t include all of my services, just the ones that aligned with the readings. You can find my paid services listed here!

pile one -> pile two -> pile three

How to choose your pile: close your eyes, take a deep breath and ask yourself that same question. Your pile is the one your eyes first land on when you open them again after that. Find your reading below the cut!

pile one

service: energy/energetics reading

how you’re feeling (wheel of fortune rx, six of wands rx)

it feels like there are forces working against you, like you’re encountering resistance every time you make a move. and it’s putting you a little on edge. this can be especially frustrating seeing as how you’ve recently received signs to proceed ahead. you have an idea of what it is you wish to achieve. but this restraint you’re up against is drumming up feelings of ego and competition here. frustrations manifesting in or stemming from your workplace or a personal friendship, perhaps? someone getting credit for something you’ve not been acknowledged for or something that was truly your doing? while it feels a little extreme, this isn’t the divine working against you, in fact they’re actually rather hands off at this moment. while shuffling i saw a very small evil eye. even in just observing your life, the divine is still protecting you. the resistance you’re encountering is a result of your own energy. something is stuck here but your guides are doing what they can to prevent any opportunities to slip through the cracks.

why this reading (queen of wands)

your understanding of what you are capable of has grown. you have the ability to create your own blessings; but you can also cause your own disasters as well. you need to control your energy with intent and remove any obstacles and stagnation. this starts with understanding your energy as it now. you need an outside observer, a new perspective.

additional signs: african lore; cancer, pisces, or gemini placements; 🧿 emoji; 1:32 am; te fiti & te kā (moana)

“the universe uses those around us to mirror our own inner beings and right now it’s as if everyone you encounter is holding one up to you.”

pile two

service: manifestation reading or oracle’s wisdom (question centred around manifesting)

what’s showing up for you (four of cups, eight of wands)

i get the sense that some of you are coming from pile one because it felt like that pile almost resonated with you, but something was missing. so by now, you’ve caught on to the fact that a portal of sorts has opened for you. the proof is in the way things you’ve barely given thought to have begun making their way into your life. now you’re trying to focus that energy. while gratitude is a key element in manifestation, i believe that you’re finding it a little hard to tap into genuine gratitude as what’s appearing for you when you intentionally try manifesting isn’t quite right. it feels like your manifestations are being rushed. while shuffling for this inner pile, i was picking up a lot of inner chatter.

you don’t have to be perfectly clear on every detail to manifest what you want into your life, but you do need clarity on what it is you truly desire and the feelings you’re bringing into your life.

why this reading (three of wands)

not only is there a lack of clarity for you at this moment, but you’re also being asked to pay attention to what you have and to not rush the delivery of what it is you truly want. in this reading, i offer my own experience with manifestation and divine guidance on how to shift your own experience. you’ve been tapping into your connection with the divine and now it’s time to listen.

additional signs: things you’ve dreamed about showing up in your waking life; mozzarella sticks, the number 2; harry styles; seeing eyes in random places

“..i assume, therefore i am.”

pile three

service: dice divination reading

how you’re feeling (two of coins, five of coins)

this is my shortest pile, because stronger than anything, i just know this is the right service for you. before i started shuffling, i was immediately drawn to the dice reading for you, pile three. right now, you’re attempting to juggle a multitude of things in your life. and honestly, it’s getting a little overwhelming. there’s a choice to make here and you feel well aware of the potential consequences and actions you’ll need to take for each one. but the problem lies in the fact that you’re still not sure which way to go. within you is conflict and indecision but that’s okay. you can feel that a new perspective exists just outside your periphery but you’ve got a sort of tunnel vision going on at the moment.

why this reading (five of cups)

in this tunnel vision you’re experiencing, it feels like you’re sacrificing something no matter which path you take. but here i can see that there’s something to be gained in each path and what you’re “losing” isn’t really loss at all. my dice give me a sort of bird’s eye view on the situation. and perhaps, i can make your choice a little easier

poker, 😤 emoji, “life is a game”, strangely targeted ads on social media

#pick a pile reading #tarot reading #tarotblr #collective reading #divination #metaphysical #pick a picture #🚪 the oracle next door #🃏 the oracle’s tarot— pick a pile readings

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flutteringfable · 7 months ago

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giving neopronouns to my favs because i want to spite that person i saw on pinterest who was bitching about when people do that. idc if any of this is ooc. the point is to spite the fun police not to be in-character >:3c (i mean obvs the neos i choose are gonna be reflective of the chars and their theming/personalities but yk what i mean i think)

venti - im gonna be honest he would use literally any pronouns ever (even ancient ones no one has heard of) but to get into specifics: hymn/hymns, breeze/breezeself, and the classic xey/xem.

scara - maybe also uses some form of ancient pronouns considering he's been around a while too! storm/storms very briefly, but then afterwards it's softer stuff perhaps with wind theming as well. gale/gales is the most common one shared.

nagito - briefly considered giving him hope/hopeself but then realized maybe he wouldn't use those? for some sort of self deprecating reasons? like "i'm not the embodiment of hope i couldn't possibly use the word as my own" type stuff. maybe more luck based stuff? chance/chances seems like a neat one, hopefully not too on the nose lolz. xe/xim also seems plausible. and while they aren't neos, i'll throw in it/its too because like. look at this dude. tell me he wouldnt use it/its

tamaki - perhaps also an it/its user? again not a neo but i wanna bring it up anyway. i can't think of any specific themed ones she'd use, aside from maybe something butterfly themed? like flutter/flutters. i think they would lean more into the more nonthemed neos like nim/nimse or vae/vaer.

bakugou - didn't particularly strike me as a neo user at first but tbh? if he found out they existed he would totally pick the "awesome sounding" ones for himself because he's Like That. king/kingself, blast/blasts, and strike/strikes are all neos i could see him using. unrelated but i like the idea of trans/nb bakugou going thru the "naming urself arson" phase because he would 100% do that

kiri - funnily enough the least likely to be a neo user (at least imo) out of the list. if he did use them, i think he would use bro as a neo (similar to how people use it in regular speech. like "bro went to the store." oh god i just remembered the meme associated with phrases like this gjnskdnfjsndn). probably also something like red/reds :D

mizuki - they already canonically use she/they which absolutely rocks, but if they used neos i think she'd use something like frill/frills or meow/meows! also. as a bonus. catkin mizuki.

#fable writes 💫#not tagging any character here to keep the fun police away #which is unfortunate but i dont want jerks in my askbox pls and thx

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azz4me · 1 year ago

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ok long ago in the dark ages few months back, back when I had no one who'll listen to my joongoo rambles, and I was newly in love, I would seek out fanart of him everywhere

I think the first time I saw kitsune joongoo was somewhere on pinterest and I was like "cuteee" But nothing much more but then that adorbs tart acc posted that fucking beautiful kitsune goo and I had DIED

THAT ONE IMAGE GRIPPED MY NECK AND I COULDN'T BREATHE SINCE

I had,,, SOOOOOOOO MANY THOUGHTS. The possiblities. The scenerios. The imagination.KITSUNE GOO!!!!!

So naturally I drew him allot but I also had a very vivid imagination series kinda in my head---

Soooo

Not really fic more like idea dumping(Kitsune goo x fem!oc you can say? Except I never decided her name)

There's this lady, in traditional attire and she's really nice but unsocial with society and spends most her times studying mythical beings, which makes everyone in town thinks she's a witch.

For that she lives deep somewhere in a forest in her home or what she calls her temple, in the privacy and nature where she studies the supernatural.

Something something happens she stumbles upon something something back to her temple-

She sets up the items she found in her ritual stand and begins reading the things written on the item peace and gasp

Suddenly everything glows and a hot man groans, standing on top of the ritual set up, well not a man… A KITSUNE!!

He's confused, he looks at her like "how am I here?" And she explains she, taken aback but also having done rituals to summon mythical creatures before, explains that she found him through something plot convenience something and he chuckles.

"Wow you talk really formally.. Huh, so I was incased to eternal sleep after…" and before he could reveal more plot he cuts himself off and grins at the lady.

"Your eyes are fixated on my tails, do you want to touch them?" He says and his 9 fluffy tails wag, inching closer to the lady's hand.

The lady being polite first tries decline but she's human she can't resist, TOUCH TOUCH TOUCH- Soft tail pats… Joon goo let's out cute fox noises (BAAAH M DEAD)

he chuckled and held her hand to stop her from totally getting engrossed only in his tail, and she retreats, embarrased, "ah, apologies, it's that I've studied your kind through only tales before, finally having met a kitsune.. I'm just in awe."

The lady explains, goo cuts her off and says "Goo. I have a name, call me goo.." He smiles, perhaps had gotten a bit annoyed by the lady continuously referring to him as a kitsune but he wasn't offended.

more conversation happens, goo acts flirty cause yes, one scene in particular I imagined

"May I study you? I'm very fascinated by your stature..." she asks innocently, but goo being the mischievous fox leans very close and whispers in her ears "You want to know how kitsunes show their love to people that respect them?"

She shivered and pulled back, "ah thatll be too much of an honour!" she exclaims naively,and goo melts cause she's so innocent and sweet

Some more stuff happens (actually its already getting so long so I'm cutting off small small imaginations I had Inbetween, my mind continued with this one story for A MONTH so it has lots of moments-)

Somewhere inbetween goo knows he has to go and take his revenge and get answers for how he was encased, so after staying with the lady in her temple until he regained his normal strength, he decided he'll have to leave.

The lady doesn't want to be left alone again, she has so much to learn about him too, goo feels he doesn't want to part ways either.. He hasn't felt this peace with someone since...forever. He would miss the gentle tail pats and getting his ear scartched too...

"Come with me, lady" He offered softly, smiling. "You have more to learn about the mythical world anyways.. And... I said I'll show you a kitsunes love too right?"

Idk why dafuq I felt the need to aesthetify the imagination,, god there's so much I skipped over too but it's so longgggg and so out of character

anyways yeah so basically I love kitsune goo.

~🍞

THAT ART OF TART'S HAD ME SEEING HEAVEN FOR A SECOND. MY JAW DROPPED WHEN I SAW IT!!! IT WAS FUCKING FUCKING BEAUTIFUL!!! I HAVE THAT DOWNLOADED ON MY FOLDERS AND IT'S EHEHEHEH- IT'S SO FUCKING PRETTY LIKE NONE WILL UNDERSTAND ME!!! I WOULD KILL TO SEE THAT IRL. THAT'S LIKE ONE OF MY FAV GOO FANARTS AND THE OTHER BEING OF iwasneverthere true to their name, garden1a and del-png klshaegvbkuo like those arts are so fucking goooodddddd AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH makes me tear up evertime i see their goo art, the true rulers of goo fandom

I am so happy i saw this before I went outside and start chasing someone with a bat. This is so cute and adorable💝💝💝💝💝💝💥💥💥

why is kitsune goo not real. It's fucking sad that the earth will never see the true beauty😞😞😞

THE TAILS. THE TAILLSSSSS!!!gv!KUFVSACFYLIGYIFYF I NEED RTO TOUCH RHEM OII WANT TO QGVABBUscuuiqguhieefschiecfhniqfhqefhi;,jb klugbkuoawgefkUIW2GFIUGwfgugefbkudsgbvukgskdgu kzxb vhzvczhch ugca ug caugc uagc scg asogcacgaus couag df ugcui avgsfoiugfgqwqbkl hi oq 3yt 021yr hfe tc avc v c8agu ogo hchcoys

#~🍞 toast #lookism #i am talking short becaus e i am really tired rn sorry toast

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thissliceofnonsense · 2 years ago

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So originally I wanted to see if I could write season three of rottmnt myself...

Based on fandom ideas mostly. There is so many interesting fanfictions and AUs that I thought I could take bits and pieces from the fandom and write a season three.

(I really wanted to participate in the fandom somehow because I was in an apathy spiral at the time of seeing rottmnt and I've never had an obsession for this long. It's the reason my world isn't so monochromatic anymore and I owe it a lot. )

What ended up happening is that I looked at all the fandom ideas and deleted episodes and thought "What if I wrote a 'fandom version' of rottmnt, with a season for each of the turtles?'

Because Mikey could get his own season with more Mikey-centric episodes because a lot of his got cut. Also also he could have a character arc surrounding how he is the most powerful mystic user out of the four. He also has the most powerful and changing emotions, and I can speak from experience in saying that emotions are extremely difficult to control. Plus, if one were to make the first season Mikey-centric then as soon as he figured out that Baron Draxum was 'family' then he would start the whole 'You're actually a good person' thing and Baron Draxum is just annoyed. That could factor into his characterization that he tries to keep everyone together even if it makes him upset. I think I could also include the "the turtles were made to be destruction machines and bring havoc upon humans" because I feel like being told your purpose is to destroy things would hurt a lot, especially to Mikey because his favorite thing is to create. *The possibilities*

Donnie would get season two, and perhaps everyone else (especially Mikey) is using Mystic powers to do all sorts of things - actively replacing his tech. I would place the "Donnie's gifts" episode here instead, with the changes that they don't use his gifts correctly despite all the time he spent on them + replaces them with mystic powers. This sends Donnie down a spiral where he tries to figure out how mystic powers work scientifically - probably how he found the library - and it leads him to consoling in Baron Draxum. Here is where all of the separation AUs play in, because Donnie gets validation from a parental figure + someone he can do science with without being told that it just messes things up. I imagine that this season centers around Donnie's thinking that the others care more about what he can do for them - his tech - than Donnie himself. And Baron Draxum - while being validating - is still furthering that thinking. (Perhaps something from 'Like father, Like Son' here where Draxum mentions that he only created Donnie out of curiosity and Donnie thinks that this is confirmation that the only thing that matters is his tech, basically turning his own special interest against him. Which... ouch.) This would lead into the 'Witch Town' episode where the others tell Donnie that what matters is him, not his tech. (I also think it would be nice for him to make tech that utilizes mystic powers for now, then he would be able to make tech with mystic powers later).

(Also also I'm obsessed with backstory so I think it would be fun to include backstory episodes where all of the misbeliefs came from + turtle tot episodes. I saw from a Pinterest post that Raph might have gotten kidnapped when he was younger - Leo might have been there- hence why he was so protective of Mikey.)

Leo would get season three, which would be basically the movie + bits and bobs from Cass's apocalypse series from @somerandomdudelmao (Which I've been obsessed with.) Because I feel like if Leo understood the gravity of what his mistakes caused (the world he destroyed), then his "I'm useless" way of thinking would devolve into "they are better off without me". And I think turning the movie into a season instead would allow for more Casey Jr. backstory and some fun with the prison dimension. I've seen some animatics and ideas floating around where Leo would have some consequences of staying in the Prison Dimension (in addition to almost dying.), mostly in the form of having the Krang infect his head - in a final attempt to escape - , and he has to fight against his own thoughts and eventually defeat the Krang (I haven't thought about this one a lot but I imagine it would have a lot of 'here's the aftermath')

Raph would get season four, which would be the Shredder, Karai (I think that's how you spell her name) and the foot clan, because Karai really needed at least a few episodes before killing her off. I imagine she would go on a "field trip" (Zuko style) with each of the turtles + April while trying to get the pieces for the shredder's armor. They would also learn about their family legacy bit by bit + the nimpo thing. Since Leo is the leader now, Raph would probably go all out in a "protective older sibling" mode, and every time they lose to the shredder he blames it on himself. They lose their home and Karai dies. And I think a few extra episodes to how they deal with the loss and how they keep losing to the shredder. (Maybe they go to April or Draxum's house for a bit??) Perhaps Raph pushes himself too far and (if I remember correctly) April - as Karai - tells Raph that he is trying his best because he loves his family and that's what matters. Overall I think the finale episodes just needed a bit extra time to fully develop.

This is still a bunch of really messy ideas and I think I would have to reread a few fanfics and rewatch the series, but it would be fun to try this out I think.

#i love rottmnt so much it saved me from apathy drowning #rottmnt is amazing #rottmnt #rise of the tmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #fandom things #rottmnt fandom #rise donatello #rise raph #rise michelangelo #leo #donnie #here's a fandom version of rottmnt #save rottmnt

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grammarrrrrr · 5 months ago

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Debunking common Kaminari beliefs

I had no idea what to call the title- as it might come across as rude or offensive and that isn't my intention- but then I realized; there's not really a way to not offend someone with this.

Normally I would consider not writing this then but I'm so tired of coming across people calling Kaminari stupid or saying he has ADHD. Because I find that offensive to people who actually have ADHD. And as you might have guessed by my profile picture, Kaminari is my favorite character and I feel obligated to defend him from people.

So just a warning before I get started; I do not have ADHD, so naturally I do not know a lot about it. Therefore, if anything I say about it is false, I'm sorry. All of my research comes from Google, and while I do know people with ADHD, I'm not even friends with them.

’Kaminari is stupid’

This belief is something I've disliked ever since my start in the MHA fandom, I always felt at unease when I saw people joking about it and just generally talking about it, but I could never place it. But now I understand; it's because Kaminari is not stupid and I knew it.

While some people might defend that too, saying he just isn't academically smart, but no; he's academically smart too. He's just smart in general.

And before you say something in the comments, remember that he got into UA, which is apparently the most prestigious school in Japan, the hardest to get into as their acceptance rate is 0.2%. And they would not let someone in who passed the practical exam, but failed the written exam.

So no; Kaminari is not stupid. He is academically and street smart.

And if you think about it; he's only bad at math (of what we've seen) and you know the people who call him stupid? Bakugou- who's pretty much a fucking genius- and Jirou; who is very smart too, as she was able to teach people instruments within WEEKS (or months? I don't remember.)

He's stupid in a class full of very smart people, but smart in a class full of average people.

I don't even think Bakugou and Jirou think he's stupid themselves; Jirou was teasing him, really just joking, because they're friends. And Bakugou... I think he just thinks Kaminari needs to study, I think he sees Kaminari's potential but that he just needs to study and actually try.

And is Kaminari stupid because he doesn't study a lot? No, because do you like studying?

Kaminari doesn't really try- insert angsty reason here- but he's still smart; a headcanon I have, based on something I saw on Pinterest, is that Kaminari used to be bullied for being smart and trying in school and then therefore decided to start over himself and not try anymore.

’Kaminari has ADHD’

Now it's okay if it's a headcanon you have to perhaps relate to Kaminari, it is, but I'm here to argue why it's not canon and why you would have to change a lot if you give Kaminari ADHD in a fanfiction:

If he's unmedicated (which most make him be) then that is IMPRESSIVE considering he's actually behaving decently in a prestigious school like UA. He is not yelling, not switching seats constantly and not throwing things at all. (Which my classmates with ADHD do.) Kaminari isn't being disruptive at all.

If he was in my class, I would forget he exists. Because he's just so calm, and laid-back, and doesn't yell or disrupt class. Kaminari doesn't do that at all; he's quiet and stays in his seat. Kaminari only ever really acts like he has ADHD when something exciting is going on and let me just tell you this; everybody struggles staying still when they're excited.

I have found an article listing the symptoms of ADHD:

Inattentiveness (difficulty concentrating and focusing)

The main signs of inattentiveness are:

•having a short attention span and being easily distracted

Well, we kind of have seen it; IN ONE EPISODE, I'M PRETTY SURE? One scene that sticks out to me was when we saw them the first time in math class, and Kaminari wasn't focusing at all but there were some others who also weren't focusing! But I never see people saying they have ADHD?

Also, they're teenagers; teenagers struggle paying attention sometimes, especially in Math class.

•making careless mistakes – for example, in schoolwork

We haven't seen it.

•appearing forgetful or losing things

Once again, haven't seen it.

•being unable to stick to tasks that are tedious or time-consuming

Haven't seen it.

•appearing to be unable to listen to or carry out instructions

Haven't seen it.

•constantly changing activity or task

Haven't seen it.

•having difficulty organising tasks

And once again, we haven't seen it!

Hyperactivity and impulsiveness

The main signs of hyperactivity and impulsiveness are:

•being unable to sit still, especially in calm or quiet surroundings

I've already explained why that doesn't fit Kaminari.

Hyperactivity and impulsiveness

The main signs of hyperactivity and impulsiveness are:

•being unable to sit still, especially in calm or quiet surroundings

I've already explained why that doesn't fit Kaminari.

•constantly fidgeting

I have seen many people say Kaminari does this. But does he really? No, I'd argue. Because all we've seen him do is massage Ojiro's tail. But what if Kaminari and Ojiro are good friends? What if Ojiro likes it? WHAT IF KAMINARI IS GOOD AT MASSAGING AND OJIRO KNOWS IT? Why can't people think out multiple reasons that aren't ”IT'S FIDGETING, HE HAS ADHD”?

Also; neurotypicals fidget too, you know? So if he does fidget, it's not necessarily an ADHD thing.

•being unable to concentrate on tasks

I don't recall seeing this.

•excessive physical movement

I have kind of already covered this and NO.

•excessive talking

No. (If you deny it, have we ever seen him talk during class?)

And if he does talk a lot, according to you; what if he's just talkative?

•being unable to wait their turn

We haven't seen it.

•acting without thinking

I don't think we've seen it.

•interrupting conversations

We haven't seen it.

•little or no sense of danger

No, that's Bakugou and Deku. But we don't say they have ADHD, do we?

Conclusion

The conclusion is, if you somehow did not understand, that Kaminari is not stupid and does not canonically have ADHD.

And doesn't anybody think it's offensive to call somebody stupid and then say they have ADHD? Am I the only one that thinks that sounds bad? And wouldn't it be offensive to somebody who actually has ADHD, who then has to see people saying a character (who checks barely any of the boxes) has ADHD?

If I saw people say this one character has autism (and I'm using autism as an example because I myself have autism) and this character doesn't fit in to barely any of the symptoms, then I would be offended. Or at least frustrated, angered. I would hate it.

So yeah, Kaminari isn't stupid and neither does he have ADHD.

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daybreakmusings · 7 months ago

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Literally all of this because who does she think she is comparing Nesta to Keir and those other monsters? What has Nesta done that even remotely puts her on the same spectrum as them?

Mor is a joke, and her "powers of truth" conveniently allow her to lie at will. For someone who has lived hundreds of years, it's sickening how easily she demonizes someone who has lived not even a fraction of her long life.

She undeservingly puts herself on a pedestal and measures others to an impossibly high standard that she herself does not meet. She is no saint. None of these characters are.

Mor was definitely a problem in Cassian and Nesta's relationship. She had no problem standing between the two of them and passed judgement on a relationship that only the two people involved seemed to understand.

"Cassian's eyes did not leave Nesta's; nor did hers leave his. There was no warmth, no tenderness on either of their faces. Only that raging intensity, that blend of contempt and understanding and fire."

Nesta and Cassian's relationship has always been something of their own making. Mor had no business trying to interfere, especially when ACOSF and ACOFAS proved that Cassian is capable of his own missteps in their relationship. Imagine the things we didn't get to see behind the scenes in ACOWAR.

Cassian also served a particular need for Mor. A type of security that she used to ward against Azriel. And for some reason, she saw that security more important than Cassian's potential happiness.

I have no idea why SJM built up this dynamic between Nesta, Cassian and Mor only to sweep it under the rug in ACOSF. I remember that Cassian even feared how Mor would react if he saw how much Nesta affected him in their bonus chapter (Wings and Embers I think).

There was of course these moments:

"At the sound of Mor's voice, Cassian snatched his hand back and pivoted toward Mor with a lazy smile. "Nothing for you to cry over, don't worry." Nesta dragged her stare from his face--down to her now empty-hand...Cassian didn't look at Nesta as she rose..."

"Mor had never seemed ruffled by mention of Casein's past lovers. Perhaps because they'd never meant much--not in the ways that counted. But if the Illyrian warrior no longer stood as a physical and emotional buffer between her and Ariel...And worse, if the person who caused that vacancy was Nesta..."

This type of ownership is toxic and possessive. To think Cassian would have to factor in Mor every time he developed a relationship is insane. And it clearly didn't have to be Nesta. Had it been anyone who threatened the status quo, she would've lashed out.

I really wanted to see how their dynamic would play out in their book. How Mor would have reacted and what the aftermath would have looked like had there been some fallout. But SJM seemed to have either forgotten what she had established, or retconned the entire thing (in true SJM fashion).

The only interesting thing that seems to be coming up in the books for Mor is whatever dynamic exists between herself and Eris. I can't remember the exact quote, but there is a suggestion that some hidden truth exists between them...

Either way, Mor remains one of my top hated characters and adds literally nothing to the story besides her Pinterest like quotes, and excessive obsession with the colour red.

to be clear: I hate Mor because she’s not a girl’s girl (though she loves to pretend she is)

I might have considered hating her less if it turned out she was so cruel to Nesta because she was wildly attracted to her and was jealous because she could see how Nesta and Cassian had a thing between them, but she’s clearly just upset at losing the attention of one of the toys she’s had fawning over her for 500 years

#anti mor #anti morrigan #I cannot stand this character omds #nesta archeron #pro nesta archeron #The Morrigan whose power is "truth”#lmaoooo #I've never heard a greater lie

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