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quentinblack · 4 years

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Smoke and Mirrors

Word Count: 8.5K words

Chapter 15 - Ron IV: Australia Magizoo (link to full story on FF.net)

Featuring: Ron Weasley & Hermione Granger

Warnings: Explicit sexual content. 18+/Rated R.

Author’s Notes: At the time of writing this was pretty much the longest chapter I’d ever written. I’ve read a lot of fluff/sex scenes in fanfic over the years, some good, some bad, some ugly, so whilst writing my first proper long-running fic I was somewhat hesitant about including it. I didn’t want to have it just in there for the sake of it, but if I could find a scene or chapter where I felt like it would work well for the story and the arc of, in this case Ron’s story, then I thought I would throw it in. The cool thing about this chapter I felt was playing around with subverting people’s expectations upon reading at the start, then have it go full circle towards the end of the chapter. It’s probably not the best chapter I’ve ever written, but it was one of the more entertaining ones to actually write.

A warm breeze brushed across Ron’s face, as he felt his fringe pushed to the left hand side of his face by the summery wind.

He leaned forward casually on the white marble railing towards the end of their hotel balcony, wearing just his sky-blue swimming trunks, whilst he watched the stunning sunset taking place across the scenic artificial beach that lay not far from their room.

Ron was not quite sure what kind of magic the Australians were using to conjure up such a relaxing ambience, but he was very impressed by it all the same.

There were entire geo-magical landscapes and weather-enchantment spells surrounding the inner walls of the hotel, which were all very carefully adapted for the preferences of different guests. Their part of the hotel had a tropical theme, equipped with a synthetic summer climate, palm trees and a beautiful beach, with the clearest of seas that one could imagine.

The hotel’s colossal size was such that Ron and Hermione had not managed to venture out to any of the other geo-magical landscapes yet. However, Ron read in the glossy brochure (entirely devoid of any magical moving images in full faux-muggle style) that there was also a secluded woodland retreat theme for lovers of nature, as well as a winter wonderland, equipped with a massive mountain for skiing - and there was even a newly built and increasingly popular section entirely based on muggle Britain’s royal heritage.

Brad hadn’t been joking when he’d said that Wizarding tourism was booming in Australia – and they were even taking advantage of people’s reluctance and fear to travel to Britain too. Ron wondered how long they would be able to capitalise on that particular niche, as Kingsley’s new government was hopefully going to help usher in a new era of peace and prosperity in the coming months and years.

“Ronald!”

Ron heard Hermione’s faint call of his name, which was barely audible above the gentle whirl of the simmering bubbles in their enormous en-suite hot-tub.

He stared down into the bubbles for a brief moment.

There was something about the water that did not look quite right, but he could not put his finger on what it was that was off about it.

He was, for a brief moment, utterly mesmerised by the relentless pulse of the bubbles and he very nearly hurled himself into the warm and inviting water, but then thought better of it.

“Ronald! Oh do hurry up, it’s urgent!”

There was a more frantic tone to his girlfriend’s call this time – and it was much louder too.

Perhaps she had received word that they had found her parents.

He paced quickly across the paved floor of their balcony and back into the room to see what it was that she wanted and… and…

Hermione was laying on her back, facing the balcony door… but her eyes were closed.

Ron looked at her in complete shock.

He couldn’t quite believe what he was seeing.

She was completely naked, except for a black lace bra that slightly covered her small, firm breasts.

Her eyes were closed, but not in a state of sleep – no, quite the opposite in-fact, they were closed in a state of pure pleasure, as, with the fingers of her right hand, she softly played with herself.

Ron felt his cock harden slightly and it began to bulge in his swimming trunks as he watched her caressing her completely shaved cunt.

Hermione opened her dark, brown eyes and she grinned devilishly as they met his own.

She bit her lip slightly and motioned with her spare left hand for him to join her on the bed, whilst she continued to masturbate with her favoured right.

Ron could not quite believe his luck and momentarily paused in panic.

He had been dreaming of this moment for months, or years really.

He had secretly hoped once it was confirmed that Harry was no longer coming with them to Australia that this moment might somehow present itself, but to have it fall into his lap this way really was like a dream come true.

Ron excitedly pulled down his trunks and discarded them to the floor, letting Hermione have her first look at his now fully erect penis, which burst out from a bushy bed of red pubic hair.

“Oh fuck,” Hermione moaned, as she bit her lip once more and began playing with herself with increased vigour.

Ron had never heard her say fuck before.

It didn’t sound quite right coming out of her pure, pretty mouth, but it turned him on and made his cock swell up even more, as he began to pull himself onto the bed towards her.

“Quickly Ron,” she sighed desperately, as he clamoured towards her gorgeous naked body. “I need you inside me… please… I’ve been waiting so long for you to finally fuck me!”

Ron began to slowly pull his bulging dick towards her tight, wet vagina.

This was it.

The moment of truth.

The moment he had waited so long for.

He thrust his cock towards her, but just as he was about to enter her everything went black and faded away.

Ron woke up in a panicked, nervous sweat, breathing heavily as he came to terms with the fact he had just been dreaming.

His arms were clutched around Hermione’s waist, with the pair having slept cradled together in their pyjamas in the lightly air-conditioned room.

He felt Hermione stir slightly – and, to his absolute horror, he discovered that the erect penis part of his dream had in fact been based on reality.

His crotch was positioned in such a way that his bulging erection, which was pressing mercilessly into his pyjama bottoms, was also pressing mercilessly into Hermione’s bottom.

He thought that there was no way that she could not feel it.

Ron adjusted the positioning of his thighs slightly so that he was no longer making direct contact with her with his lower body, but just as soon as he had done that she had wriggled herself backwards a bit, which meant his cock was now pushed up against the back of one of her thighs instead.

He wriggled slightly to get away from her again, but after a few moments she once again moved back towards him, inadvertently nudging his hard-on in the process.

It was almost as if she was doing it deliberately, but she was still half-asleep and probably hadn’t even noticed what was happening.

Ron lay awake in their king-sized bed still spooning Hermione for another ten minutes, with it gradually becoming less awkward as his erection slowly subsided.

It soon became apparent though that he would not fall back to sleep any time soon, so he relented and decided to get up and shower

The hotel bathroom was state-of-the-art, even by muggle standards according to Hermione – and it was all very impressive, with the hot water jets blasting against his fair-skin soon ensuring that he was fully awake and energised.

Ron spent a considerable amount of time in the shower, as once he had fully washed his hair and body he slowly lathered himself up once again and masturbated, thinking of the naked Hermione from his dream as he relieved himself and eventually climaxed.

It took several minutes to ensure the last of his cum had trickled down the drain… then, just as the last of it was washing away there was a knock on the bathroom door.

He ignored the knock as he meticulously watched the final traces of his semen slide out of sight.

There was another knock on the door, but this time it was a fair bit louder.

“Ronald! Are you alright? You’ve been absolutely ages in there!” Hermione remarked, with a slight sound of worry in her sleepy sounding voice.

Ron quickly wrapped himself in a towel and in a slightly panicked fluster he opened the door.

“I’m fine,” he said. “Just enjoying myself in the shower,” he blurted out.

“Oh, I see-

“Enjoying myself because it’s bloody brilliant!” he quickly added. “I mean, as shower’s go, its right up there… it’s really good… wakes you right up… you should try it!”

“Right, yes… well, I will have to, when I have a wash myself…” she replied, perhaps a bit confused at his feigned enthusiasm for the shower. “I was just a little worried that’s all, I know, I was just being a bit silly, but you don’t usually take that long and you locked the door and…

“You’d get used to locking bathroom doors too if you grew up living in a house with Fred and George!” he replied softly, with what he thought was a well-timed save, as he remembered the countless times that his older twin brothers had tormented him and caused many a toilet-related mishap, which were now nothing more than bittersweet memories.

“Yes, of course,” Hermione retorted. “And I know you would never wish for me to intrude or invade your privacy-

Ron momentarily considered correcting her on this point, as, on the contrary, he would’ve loved nothing more than for her to walk in on him naked, but he swiftly decided against it.

“I suppose what I’m trying to say is that I just wanted to make sure that you were alright,” she said, as she blushed slightly.

“As always I appreciate your concern,” he joked, before leaning forward and kissing her on the lips, which caused his soaking wet hair to press right up against her dry, bushy mane.

She was slightly taken aback at first, but then soon pressed her lips back to his – and she even briefly parted them, to allow him to slip his tongue into her mouth, before she reached back and broke free.

“Oh and can you believe this?” she demanded, instantly killing the moment, as she then reached down towards the bed and picked up their daily newspaper, which must have been delivered whilst he was washing.

It was The Sydney Spell, which seemed to be the Australian equivalent of The Daily Prophet.

“CROOKED KRUM SEIZED AS MATCH-FIXING SCANDAL ROCKS THE QUIDDITCH WORLD!” read the headline, which was accompanied by an animated picture of Viktor Krum catching the snitch in the World Cup final they’d seen live all those years ago, before the Death Eaters had wreaked havoc on the camp-site.

“Bloody hell!” Ron exclaimed.

“My thoughts exactly,” Hermione added in a glum tone. “You’re obviously a lot more clued up on the nuances of a Quidditch match than I am…” she added, as Ron reflected on whether this was the first time she had ever admitted that he was more clued up on something.

“You watched that match… do you really think it’s possible that it was fixed?” she asked.

“Well… I dunno,” he began, as he thought back to it. “I mean, it was a little odd that he caught the snitch in a losing position, but it does happen… it’s a very fast-paced sport so he could well have missed something or thought the score was closer than it actually was… and… well, Quidditch players aren’t exactly renowned for being the most intelligent of people -

“You know full well that Viktor is not stupid!” she hissed slightly.

“Well… no,” he conceded. “But if I remember rightly both Krum and Lynch spotted the snitch at the same time, so if Krum hadn’t have caught it when he did then they would’ve still lost anyway, just by an even bigger margin.”

“Yes, that’s what I thought,” Hermione replied, deep in contemplation. “Although Krum was, or rather, still is considered one of, if not the greatest seeker of his generation, is he not?”

Ron felt a slight flush of jealously at hearing her talk about Krum with such high regard.

“Well… I mean, some would argue that to be considered the greatest seeker of a generation you would have to win a World Cup, which Krum has never-

“If not the greatest, then one of the greatest then?” she sternly replied.

“Yes, one of the greatest, of course,” he quickly conceded.

“Then wouldn’t one of the greatest seekers of his generation always be aware of what the current score was? And wouldn’t one of the greatest seekers of his generation do everything that was physically possible to avoid catching the snitch until he was absolutely sure it would win his country the World Cup?” she asked rhetorically, perhaps now questioning herself more than Ron.

“I… I suppose-

“Think back to our 3rd year… the final game of the season against Slytherin, when Harry caught the snitch to win the House Cup,” she said, once more deep in thought.

“Oh yeah – that was brilliant!” Ron exclaimed, as he remembered the moment Harry had captured the little golden-snitch with both hands off of his broom.

“Think harder!” Hermione urged. “You remember, don’t you? Gryffindor had to win the game by at least 210 points, otherwise Slytherin would have still won the Cup on point’s difference.”

“Yeah… yeah I do remember, of course,” Ron said, as he thought he began to grasp what she was getting at.

“Wood drilled it into Harry for ages… whatever you do, Harry, do not catch the snitch whilst it is mathematically impossible for Gryffindor to win the Cup. You do remember that, yes?” she demanded.

“Yes… yes of course I remember. So what are you saying then? You actually think that this stuff about Krum is true? That he really did agree to throw the final?” he asked, slightly bewildered at what she seemed to be insinuating.

“No. Of course not!” Hermione snapped back.

Ron was completely lost now.

“But I thought you were saying-

“I don’t think for one moment that Viktor agreed to throw the match. His professional pride, desire to win and love for his country would prevent him from doing that,” she said solemnly. “However, I do think there’s a very good chance that it was fixed and that somebody may have been controlling him... but who… how… and to what end?”

Australia Magizoo really was quite something.

Their day had begun with an extremely filling breakfast that could’ve possibly put even Hogwarts to shame, as Ron loaded up on copious amounts of poached eggs, bacon and sausages.

Hermione had settled for a few freshly made French pastries and a slice of toast with something called Vegemite spread onto it. Ron was not sure what exactly Vegemite was, but it had an awful smell to it and did not look up to too much cop either – his girlfriend reassuring him that it was just a type of yeast extract did not particularly sell it either. It looked like it had been scooped out of the bottom of a cup in one of Professor Trelawney’s tea-reading classes.

Following their stomachs being filled by their respective breakfasts, they had spent nearly the entire day exploring the gigantic grounds of Woollahra’s wizarding tourist attraction – and Ron could see why it was such an attraction.

The park was filled with almost every creature that you could possibly name, with a large section even being dedicated to housing non-magical creatures of interest too - such as lions, giraffes and even wild polar bears in a sub-zero arctic section!

A lot of the magizoo’s star attractions were dedicated to beasts that Ron and Hermione had been fortunate (or unfortunate) enough to encounter before. He had never really considered how lucky they’d actually been over the last seven years, at least in terms of seeing such a wide array of creatures.

Children and adults alike were crowding round for a glimpse of a phoenix in the flesh, which Ron shrugged off as nothing too exciting, as he’d seen Dumbledore’s one countless times before in their former headmaster’s office– and he’d even been flown out of the Chamber of Secrets by it in second year.

They balked at a massive queue that had formed for rides on the thestrals, with many lucky adults and children very excited at the prospect of riding on a beast that was invisible to them. Hermione read on a sign that outside of Britain the wild populations of thestrals were dwindling quite a lot, so for many non-Brits this would be their first and possibly only chance to ever see, or indeed, not see a thestral, which any British student would obviously just take for granted - they were even used as a mode of transport at Hogwarts!

If they had thought that the queue for the thestrals was large then that paled in comparison to the one for the hippogriffs, as everyone longed to receive a bow from one of the delightful, but deadly part-horse, part-eagle creatures. They did not linger there too long, as again, unlike much of the world’s population they had also had their fair share of experiences with hippogriffs.

The next portion of the park following the hippogriffs was dedicated to the world’s deadliest beasts – and after Ron hastily hurried Hermione away from the acromantulas, they spent a while looking at the magnificent Antipodean Opaleye dragon. The purple dragon was a New Zealand-native and as such, one of the more locally sourced creatures in the entire magizoo, although they soon noticed that the next part of the tour was actually dedicated entirely to the magical creatures of Australia.

At first they were introduced to the bunyips which were based in a large swamp. They were peculiar creatures, with big tusks, flippers for feet and large bushy tails. A sign near them spoke of how over the years there had been several infamous incidents where rogue bunyips had got loose and attacked muggles, with the beasts coming out at night in the cover of darkness to attack small children, women or defenceless household pets.

One of the world’s last living muldjewangk was housed in a lake not far from the bunyips. The muldjewangk, who did not surface whilst they were at the lake, were described as kind of like a cross between giant squid and merpeople.

It was said that in centuries gone by hordes of muldjewangk terrorised muggle fisherman all over the Indian Ocean, but in the last hundred years they had become an endangered species thanks partially to pollution in muggle waters, but mostly due to wizarding-poachers hunting them for their teeth and blood, with both apparently fetching a pretty penny due to their rarity and variety of uses.

It was just as they were walking away from the lake, somewhat disappointed at not glimpsing a sight of the muldjewangk, that they bumped into Tezza, who was the porter that had taken their bags upon arrival and asked about You Know Who’s nose. It seemed that Tezza performed an array of roles at the hotel, one of which also seemingly involved working with the creatures themselves.

“Alright guys?!” he chirped excitedly when he spotted them, as they said hello and made some small talk.

“Didn’t get to see the muldjewangk? Don’t be too down guys, they don’t like coming out during the day much anyways. The kids here are always devo at missing out like, but let me show you some little buggers that I think you’ll both be stoked on seeing.”

They followed Tezza over to some large gum trees, which had magical protections placed just in-front of them, indicating how dangerous whatever beasts they housed must be.

“Now these little ones might look cute, but trust me, they’re fierce little bastards especially if they’re after a bit of grub,” he said, as he pointed to what looked like a tiny little bear climbing the tree nearest to them.

“Isn’t that a koala bear?” a confused Hermione asked, as Tezza burst out laughing.

“They might look like koalas, but take a look for yourself,” Tezza said, before waving his wand and erecting a human-like mannequin on the ground about 10 metres directly below the creature. It noticed and after a brief second of contemplation it instantly threw itself down through the sky, claws first, soon landing on the head of the mannequin, tearing it apart with both its paws and teeth.

“Bloody hell!” Ron swore.

“You can say that again, mate!” Tezza replied. “That little bugger is called a drop bear and well… it lives up to its name,” he added, as the little beast tore furiously at the prop, before Tezza conjured it up a few dead rats for it to feast on instead as a treat for its part in the show.

“Do they mind being here… at the magizoo… with all these people ogling at them?” Hermione asked Tezza.

“The drop bears?”

Ron felt a little awkward as he guessed the train of thought and line of questioning that his girlfriend would have for Tezza.

“Yes, the drop bears, but, well, all of the creatures and beasts you house here really. Do they like it here… rather than being in the wild?”

“To tell you the truth Miss Granger,” Tezza said, as he paused for a brief moment before continuing. ”For most of them now there ain’t no wild no more anyway... what with all the poachers like, and it ain’t as easy as it was years ago keeping ‘em away from exposure to muggoes neither. It’s the same way most the muggo animals are going too. Woollahra’s the best place for ‘em I say.”

Hermione seemed content enough with Tezza’s response, although Tezza was hardly going to turn round and admit the creatures all hated it there if they did anyway.

The magizoo worker began guiding them away from the drop bear enclosure and further along to a stretch of grassland in the distance.

“Course, we don’t house any beasts that are sentient,” Tezza continued, as Hermione nodded along in approval. “You won’t find no centaurs, vampires or werewolves here… ‘tho all the guests would be clamouring to see ‘em if they were, as you can imagine, like.

Fancy that ehh? Seeing an actual centaur or werewolf in the flesh, now that would be proper gnarly!”

Ron was once more left feeling a bit spoilt by his education.

He couldn’t quite believe that Tezza had never seen a werewolf or centaur in the flesh, at Hogwarts they’d had a werewolf and a centaur among the faculty at varying intervals of his stint at school.

“What about house elves?” Ron asked nervously, as he stole a quick glance at Hermione, who looked even more interested in Tezza’s response to the latest question posed to him, as they walked past a giant, yellow warning sign that read:

“CAUTION: YOU ARE NOW APPROACHING THE YARA-MA-YHA-WHO ENCLOSURE. THIS BEAST IS EXTREMELY DANGEROUS! DO NOT ENGAGE IT IF IT ESCAPES! CHILDREN UNDER THE AGE OF 15 MUST BE ACCOMPANIED BY A RESPONSIBLE PARENT OR GUARDIAN!”

“You certainly won’t find no house-elves here!” Tezza said in a slightly bemused tone. “Not working for us anyway… course we get lots of rich families from America, India and France come and visit who bring theirs along for the trip… ya’ kno’, funny thing is I’d never even seen one in the flesh before I started working here myself!”

“Why is that?” Hermione asked. “Are house-elves against the law in Australia?” she added, with a hopeful tone in her voice.

Tezza audibly chuckled.

“Against the law? We’d have to bloody have some for ‘em to be illegal! Never really caught on down here since nobody could bloody afford one. I’m sure whoever cooked up the idea for this place could have their pick of them now though, like, you know I-

“WHAT’S THAT?!” Ron burst out, as Hermione instinctively grabbed his hand, as she too saw a giant bear-like creature waddling towards them.

It was just their luck.

The one time they visit the magizoo was the time that the extremely dangerous creature broke out.

Why was it always them?!

At least Tezza would know what to do.

He didn’t look in the slightest bit afraid, which reassured Ron that he must know how to handle the very dangerous looking beast heading towards them.

“What’s what?” a bemused looking Ted asked them, as Hermione and Ron both drew their wands, which confused him even more.

“Over there!” Hermione gasped, as she pointed over to the furry giant which was getting closer to them, albeit at a fairly slow pace.

“HA-HA! You can’t mean… oh you think that silly bugger is the dangerous beast that sign was warning yous about?” he asked with a patronising look on his tanned face, as Ron nodded awkwardly.

“HA-HA! You wait until all of the lads hear about this one!” he blurted out, with a furious grin washed across his face. “Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger frightened off their rocker by a silly old yowie! COME HERE YA BIG WALKING CARPET!” Tezza shouted, as the yowie responded to his call and quickened his pace, although only slightly.

“They’re clever creatures, yowie’s, but they’re bloody pussies. Wouldn’t hurt a mozza, even if it was biting on one of their balls!” Tezza joked, as he stretched his arms out for the yowie to give him a hug.

The yowie towered over him, it must’ve been at least seven foot, but he showed no fear when it barked softly and wrapped its furry arms right round his thin-frame, almost lifting him off of the ground with enthusiasm as it hugged him.

“We call him Chewy,” Tezza said excitedly, as the yowie released him. “You know, like the wookie from Star Wars.”

“What’s Star Wars?” Ron asked blankly.

“Only one of the greatest bloody movies of all time, mate!” Tezza replied indignantly.

“I’ve never watched any movies,” Ron responded.

“You ain’t ever seen a single movie in ya’ life?”

Tezza looked in a state of shock, perhaps he was a half-blood or a muggle-born and had grown up with the muggle television.

Ron shook his head in response.

“Blimey. Where did you find this guy?!” Tezza quizzed Hermione.

“It’s kind of a long story,” she replied, before smirking a little at both Tezza and then Ron himself.

“Now you run along now Chewy,” Tezza ordered to the yowie. “Shouldn’t be out here near the yara-ma-yha-who anyway you daft git,” he added, as he poked his bear-like companion. The yowie obeyed, sauntering off in the opposite direction after uttering what sounded like it could only be a laugh at Tezza.

“Oh my goodness,” Hermione mouthed, seemingly noticing something in the distance. “Is that… is that…

“Too right-o, Miss Granger,” Tezza replied. “That is a yara-ma-yha who.”

Ron saw it out of the corner of his eye, rested on a similar tree to the one that the drop bear had been grasping to before it flew out of the sky.

The yara-ma-yha-who was a slightly slimy, amphibious looking red creature that can’t have been much bigger than the average goblin.

Its dark blood-red body resembled a frightening cross between a frog, an octopus and a common garden gnome.

It was truly hideous.

It hung to the tree by its tiny red hands, but it also had thin, slippery suckers on the rear of its body which it used to swing around the tree too, almost like a monkey would do with its tail.

“That little bugger is damn-near the most deadly beast in this entire magizoo. If I had to face the dragon or that thing without a wand – I’d choose the dragon every bloody time… you wanna kno’ why?” Tezza asked, pausing slightly for effect.

Ron suspected that he would tell them the answer whether they wanted to hear it or not, but nonetheless he humoured Tezza all the same.

“Alrite, I’ll tell you why… you run into a hungry dragon on a bad day, it’ll smoke you alrite… but dragons don’t play with their food… a dragon will roast ya’ long before it thinks about eating ya’ to stop ya’ from runnin’ away… but these things… mate… ya kno’ what these things do to ya? It uses those suckers to drain you of your blood, but not enough to kill ya’… na’, it takes just enuff to weaken ya’ and keep ya’ within its grasp… then it will swallow ya’ whole… they can swallow up to four time their body weight… but that’s not the last of it, oh na’, wouldn’t be so bad if it was, like, but that’s only the start of it… ya’ see once it falls asleep it pumps oxygen right through the victim’s brain and airwaves… acts kinda like an oxygen tank in there… to try and keep ya alive… then as it gradually comes out of its slumber it slowly regurgitates ya’… then… when it wakes up… it starts the process all over again. They can sometimes keep their prey alive for over four days before finally killing it for good.”

Hermione said nothing, but she had a look of utter disgust and horror on her face.

“And has one of those…things… ever actually escaped?” Ron managed to muster.

“Oh Christ no!” Tezza jibed. “They’d probably shut the whole place down if one of those got out and killed a poor little ankle biter or somethin’. Can you imagine the bad press we’d-

“ATTENTION ALL STATIONS!”

A loud, slightly muffled booming voice came out from what looked like a small, portable muggle radio on Tezza’s belt.

“WHO WAS THE LAST OF YOUS TO HAVE SEEN OUR BRITISH VISITORS? I REPEAT, WHO WAS THE LAST OF YOUS TO HAVE SEEN OUR BRITISH VISITORS? OVER!”

Tezza smiled slightly.

“Funny you should ask that, Zoe,” he said into the radio. “I’m with ‘em right now. Over.”

“Is that you Terrence? Over.”

“Sure as hell is, Zoe, you see-

“What’s your nearest assembly point? Over.”

“Well… we’re just by the old Yara-ma-yha-who enclosure… so I’d say…erm… ah ya! The Great Barrier Reef café. Over.”

“That’s great. Head over with them now… I’ll meet you there in ten minutes. Over.”

“No worries, Zoe, mate. I’ll bring ‘em right down. Over,” he said into the radio, as he started heading east, then motioned with his hand for them to follow him.

The Great Barrier Reef café turned out to be a massive muggle-style aquarium, with a sizeable restaurant in the back serving up mostly seafood-based cuisine. The aquarium hosted mostly exotic fish found in the seas of Sydney, but there were also other creatures like sharks and turtles housed there too.

Tezza stayed with them in a waiting area of the main reception, which housed a large open-tank filled with different types of rays, which people, mostly children, were able to reach in and feed if they so pleased.

Whoever had designed the hotel had really gone all in on the muggle-theme, as this particular section even had a large boxed television raised up high on the wall, with some kind of muggle wildlife program playing.

“That man on the television. Is he a muggle?” Hermione asked, as the blonde, burly man in a khaki outfit stalked a large crocodile whilst he talked to the camera.

“Who? Steve Irwin?! He’s only one of the most famous muggoes in all of Australia! Surprised you ain’t heard of him,” he replied.

“But how… but how is he able to avoid being killed by that crocodile? If he’s not a wizard?” Ron quizzed, as he too began watching on at the TV in surprise.

“Beats me, mate. But he ain’t in no danger – those crocco’s love him,” Tezza said with a wry smile on his face, as he placed his left hand into the water and reached down. “Why… Steve-o up there’s in no more danger with one of those crocs than I am with this little sting-ray,” he added, as he caressed one of the floating flat creatures with his fingers.

“AH YA CUNT!!!!” Tezza blurted out, splashing water everywhere as he quickly removed his hand from the tank.

“The little bastard stung me!” he exclaimed in outrage.

“Hermione Granger? Ron Weasley?”

Ron saw a middle-aged lady with heavily tanned skin and thick dark hair, who he guessed had been the female voice from the muggle radio. She was well dressed, with a face full of perfectly applied make-up and the fixed-forced smile of someone who had probably been working in customer-facing roles for a long time.

“That’s us,” Hermione responded eagerly, with a distant sound of hope in her voice.

“I’m Zoe Federici. Head of Guest Relations here at the hotel,” Federici said, just before shaking both of their hands. “The Ministry have sent us word that they have found your parents, Miss Granger,” she added, flashing a brief smile and her bright, white teeth in Hermione’s direction.

Ron heard an audible gasp of both relief and excitement from Hermione, as she grasped onto his hand very tightly.

“Given the circumstances they thought it best to err on the side of caution and have opted against using magic to transport them here. Their current working plan is for you to be re-introduced just after breakfast tomorrow morning… meet me in the main lobby reception just after 10AM... and in the mean-time, please, if there is anything I or any of my staff can do to improve your stay with us, all you have to do is ask.”

The good news that Federici had delivered to them earlier in the day had come as a pretty big relief to Ron, but it couldn’t compare to the relief that it had taken off of his girlfriend’s shoulders. In the hours that followed Hermione had finally allowed herself to properly enjoy the extravagant and exotic surroundings that they found themselves located in.

Their first act, on Zoe’s own suggestion, had been a trip to the beach bar in their section of the resort. The Guest Relations manager had insisted on pouring their first round of celebratory cocktails herself, which had presented a new dilemma for them, as neither of them had ordered an alcoholic cocktail before in their lives.

This did not act as a set-back for Federici, more-so, it actually put a genuinely excited smile on her face, as she whipped out a strange, leathery brown hat which had several corks attached to it with string.

“This isn’t just any old hat,” she had said. “This hat has been charmed to explore your mind, body and soul to work out the exact cocktail that you would most like at that given moment.”

They had each had a go at trying on the hat over two hours ago – and were both now pretty tipsy after consuming their fair share of cocktails at the bar. Hermione drinking the refreshing rum, lime and mint mojitos, with Ron knocking back the even sweeter pineapple and coconut concoctions called pina coladas.

Ron was now drinking his fourth, or maybe his fifth, as they relaxed on comfortable cushioned chairs back up at their balcony whilst watching the artificial sun-set. The synthetic weather was still warm enough that Ron sat with his top off, just wearing a pair of swim-shorts, whilst Hermione relaxed in a white swimsuit, which was nicely cut around her cleavage.

Ron was sure that Hermione had caught him on one of the few occasions that he had stolen a quick glance at her slightly protruding breasts – and to his surprise she had not told him off, instead she had said nothing, merely looking away hesitantly with a wry smile on her pretty face.

“You know… there was something Miss Burke said back at the Australian Ministry that I found a little… odd,” a tipsy Hermione said, as Ron looked over at her, pondering his reply as he tried to avoid staring at her cleavage.

“Did you know that Kingsley had a brother?” she said with a confused look on her face before he could think of anything to say in response. “She mentioned that back when they were at Hogwarts together Kingsley and his brother used to gloat to her about the Quidditch results.”

Ron did vaguely remember Olivia Burke making an offhand comment like that, but such was his mental and physical state following that horrific portkey journey that it had completely passed him by, not registering as particularly odd at the time – or if it had, that train of thought had swiftly departed the station of his mind just as soon as it had entered it.

“No… no I don’t think he’s ever mentioned having a brother before,” Ron responded, as he searched through his less than sober mind for any recollection of such a conversation.

“Don’t you agree that that’s a little bit odd?” Hermione offered, as she took a deep sip on her straw, twirling around the little mint leaves in her sugar-coated glass as she did so.

It was a little bit odd, Ron agreed, but that sort of thing wasn’t completely unheard of in the wizarding community.

“Perhaps a little, yes… but Mum never likes to talk about her brothers… maybe Kingsley’s brother was killed in the first war too.”

“That’s a good point,” Hermione said. “I hadn’t considered that… yes… yes, you may well be right.”

“Always the tone of surprise,” he teased sarcastically, as Hermione smiled a little, then let out a tipsy laugh.

“I do understand why she never talks about them,” Ron continued, suddenly steering the conversation to a more serious direction, perhaps partially due to the influence of the alcohol, as he noticed the expression on Hermione’s face turn from a smile to one of sympathy.

“Dad always said that a little part of her died the day she found out that they’d been killed… and I know it must have been really hard for her… but I do sometimes wish she would’ve talked about them more. Even just told us some funny family stories or something. It feels weird to even say their names out loud since nobody would ever talk about them…

Hermione reached over and placed her soft, warm hand on top of Ron’s, caressing his hand with her slim fingers as he kept talking.

“… I won’t ever let myself do that with Fred,” Ron added, trying to reassure himself more than Hermione.

“When we’re married and have children of our own I’ll tell them every funny story about Fred that I know and-

Ron stopped himself as he realised what he had just said.

Hermione had already started laughing.

“Wait- that’s not what I meant- I-

“When we’re married and have children of our own?” Hermione jibed, as she sarcastically raised her eyebrows.

“No- no- I meant- you know what I-

“I’m very interested to hear what you meant to say, Ronald,” Hermione said, still giggling at his mistake, as she stood up from her chair after finishing the last of her drink.

Ron clumsily pulled himself up from his chair so that they were standing face to face in the sunset.

“Well I just meant if… you know if-

Hermione kissed his lips before he had a chance to finish.

He felt her arms wrap tightly around his shoulders, pulling him in even closer, as he rested his own arms around the back of her slender waist.

“I don’t know how much you know about the human anatomy Ron,” she said softly, almost in a whisper, as she temporary broke away from the kiss. “But it seems a little premature for you to be thinking about getting me pregnant when we haven’t even… you know…”

Ron felt his heartrate rise rapidly.

He didn’t quite know what to say.

Her skin looked so soft and creamy.

His eyes fell on her cleavage once more and he noticed the outline of her two nipples and breasts against her white swimsuit.

His cock tingled slightly as he imagined what it would be like to have one of her breasts in his mouth.

“Why is it that we haven’t yet, do you think?” Hermione asked.

“I dunno… I mean-

“I suppose I have been awfully stressed about my parents… and I’m sure it has been awfully difficult for you too… we’ve been so caught up with everything we just haven’t really had time to think about it,” she concluded, as Ron nodded in agreement, even though it wasn’t the slightest bit true that he hadn’t had time to think about it.

“You do want to… you know… don’t you?” she whispered, with a look of doubt on her face.

“Yes!�� he blurted out. “I mean… if… only if you want to,” he quickly added.

“You don’t think I look awfully stupid… in this swimsuit, I mean. You don’t think I look too-

“I think you look perfect,” Ron drunkenly pronounced, as he pulled her close and passionately kissed her lips. He heard her sigh softly as he ran his hands gently down her back, eventually resting them on her bottom.

Ron squeezed her bum cheeks firmly as her tongue aggressively fought its way into his mouth.

He lifted her up and stumbled slightly, before she straddled her legs around his waist as they continued lustfully kissing whilst he carried her into the bedroom, before thrusting her down onto the bed and pressing her down against the sheets as they continued their steamy embrace.

Ron broke away from kissing her lips and quickly worked his way across first to her right cheek, then further down the side of her face before he began amorously pecking her neck.

Hermione sighed softly, then began to press her nails across his back as he remembered the technique that Lavender had taught him during their brief fling in sixth year.

He opened his mouth as if to bite her neck, but instead he sucked strongly, causing his girlfriend to gasp with pleasure. Ron wondered if he would be the first person to give Hermione a love-bite, he hoped he was – and the jealous thought of Viktor Krum, or anyone else having done this to her only caused him to suck with a renewed sense of vigour.

Hermione scratched his back in delight as he felt his penis grow harder and harder, as he broke free of his sucking to begin snogging her again, tasting the rum, lime and mint on her tongue and breathe as he did so.

His train of thought briefly went back to Lavender Brown – and he quickly pushed the horrific sight of her dead, mutilated body out and away from his mind.

He pulled back from his embrace with Hermione and got up slightly, before untying the cords and taking off his shorts, leaving him fully naked and exposed in-front of her.

Ron’s cock stood firmly to attention and Hermione studied it with enough curiosity for him to feel reassured that his was the very first that she had seen in the flesh. The excitement of her studying his naked body like it was a brand-new book made him feel about as horny as he could ever remember feeling.

She followed his lead in getting undressed and smiled shyly at him, before sitting up and slowly taking off her white swimsuit and casting it aside, leaving only her glorious, bare-naked skin in its wake.

Her body was scattered with occasional freckles, much lighter and less noticeable than his own, but noticeable in their own way nonetheless. His dick stiffened up even more as he finally cast his eyes on her beautiful breasts and perky, pink nipples. She had a small mole on her left breast and just above her belly button – and upon seeing those little imperfections he had never felt more intimate and close to her.

He stared at her bare, naked body as she did the same to him, for all his sneaky glances at her breasts throughout the last hour or so, she was more than getting even now as she bashfully eyed up his cock.

Ron looked towards the middle of her legs and unlike her smoothly shaven sex in his dream that morning, her vagina was covered by small tufts of bushy, brown pubic hair.

They caught each other’s eye at the same time and hungrily embraced once more, lips against lips, tongue to tongue, as they began to explore each other’s body with their hands. Ron fondled her breasts firmly, as she reached out and got her first grasp of his erect cock.

He was surprised he didn’t cum there and then, but he relaxed himself as she begin gently pulling up and down on his penis as his right hand trickled down from her breast to her stomach, before he eventually reached the inside of her thighs and the tufts of her pubic hair.

Hermione moaned and swore under her breath as his fingers slowly glided their way through the hairs and reached her glistening clitoris and he began to softly rub it, as Lavender had once taught him.

At the time of their break-up Ron had harboured a slight tinge of regret that they had only ever gone as far as to fondle around with each other, but in hindsight he had absolutely no regrets considering that he was about to lose his virginity with the girl that he had loved for several years now.

The sight of Lavender’s dead corpse once again entered his mind though - and for a brief moment all sense of arousal was lost.

“Don’t stop,” Hermione whispered gently – and he was soon just as horny as he was before when she increased the speed and force of her grip on his cock.

He continued to press his fingers against her, feeling her wetness increase with each stroke, causing her to dampen her pubic hairs and cover his index and middle fingers with the fruits of his labour.

“I think I’m ready,” she softly gasped, as she reluctantly relented her grip of his cock and lay back, opening her legs even further.

He stared down at his beautiful naked girlfriend, her dark brown eyes gazing down at him with a look of both excitement and slight nervousness on her face.

Ron remembered that he hadn’t yet uttered the contraceptive spell and quickly grabbed his wand from the bedside table, muttering the spell he had first seen written on a desk in one of the Herbology greenhouses in 3rd year.

A feint and very quickly invisible trail of white smoke brushed against, then evaporated onto his penis, as he held onto Hermione’s thighs and then slowly but surely entered her tight, wet cunt.

Hermione gasped heavily, with what seemed like a mixture of pleasure and pain.

So this was it.

This was what it felt like.

The sight of Lavender’s corpse once again entered his horrified mind as he came to terms with the fact that he was finally inside of Hermione and had lost his virginity.

He reached out and held one of his girlfriend’s hands, softly pulling his penis slightly out and then back inside of her again.

Now he saw Remus, Tonks and finally Fred’s lifeless body laid out in the great hall.

Ron tried to get the horrible, graphic images out of his head but they just wouldn’t budge.

He slowed his rhythm almost to a halt entirely - and felt the blood and the excitement of his arousal slowly shift away from his penis.

His eyes opened slightly and Hermione shot him a curious, concerned look.

“Are you alright?” she murmured.

Lavender – dead.

Remus – dead.

Sirius – dead.

“Ronald?”

Mad Eye – dead.

Tonks – dead.

Dobby – dead.

Dumbledore – dead.

Fred… Fred… dead.

“They’re all gone,” he mumbled, as he felt the hot tears began to form in his eyelids.

“They’re all dead.”

The tears began to slowly run down his face, before he quickly began blubbing his eyes out.

Hermione held him tight for a while, as he buried his face into her bosom and then slowly cried himself to sleep.

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angrylizardjacket · 5 years

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M1 {Daniel Webber}

Summary: You and Daniel visit his family, and his mother is the one to pick you both up from the airport.

A/N: 1440 words. Ok so my home town is about an hour away from Daniel Webber's home town and I was traveling back to this weekend and it turns out you take the same Highway back to mine as you do to his and I saw the sign for it and I was like fucking Gosford and then I was like...... he's probably travelled on this highway, and then this idea seized me by the eyeballs and I wrote half of it half asleep in my childhood home and then half of it today after I got back to my uni home. I'm using talk to text so it's a bit rambling. anyway no warnings just sickly fluff and I also don't know anything about his actual family so this is all made up for fun, but if I, a suburban Australian, can't romanticise suburban Australia, like, who will? So yeah I wrote this on my phone, pretty sure it's not great, like genuinely I'm not super happy with it but it is what it is and it exists now.

His mother picks you both up from the airport. His manager had tried to insist on a personal shuttle to escort the two of you from the airport back to his family home, but his mother would not back down so easily. He has a place of his own, a car of his own, all in Sydney, but since you were only stopping in for a week for his dad's birthday, it seemed silly to take his car only to drive it back and store it again before you're off, jet setting back to America to start the press tour for The Dirt.

So now it's nearly five at night, and you've just landed. You stretch and yawn in the line for customs, having thankfully yet uncomfortably slept for the better half of the flight from LA to Sydney; business class seats are very nice, but they're not perfect. He's tired too, travelling always makes him tired, suitcase in one hand, the other holding his passport and the documents he'd had to sign on the plane to reenter the country. He presses a kiss to your shoulder, only for you to look at him in confusion, before your mind registers the moment and it fades through to a soft, fond smile.

You kiss him gently, a quiet moment shared in the 'no declarations to be made' line at immigration, too tired to care about the blatant PDA, nor the potential onlookers. He just grins when he moves back, steps forward in the line, and you're right beside him, leaning against him, excited beneath your exhaustion, to get to see his family and eat their home cooking again.

His dad always makes a mean barbeque whenever you and Daniel come back to his home town; his pineapple fritters are to die for, a family secret, he always says with an exaggerated wink. It makes you laugh and Daniel roll his eyes, though he's smiling too.

He'd been so nervous the first time he'd brought you to meet them, and it was awkward and a little bit tense for all of three minutes before his dad cracked a joke to which you'd actually, genuinely laughed; you were in.

Back in the present, his mum's waiting with a huge grin, waving and calling to you both as you descend the ramp from immigration to the departures collection point. She gives you both a big kiss on the cheek, talking a mile a minute, offering to take your things, asking if you need a hand with anything. Daniel assures her that you're both right, but you're still leaning against him, and you try to stifle a yawn.

"Please, sweetheart, at least let me take your suitcase; I know it's on wheels but I parked a fair ways away and you look so tired."

You don't even have the energy to fight her on this, though you're grateful when she takes the suitcase, leaving you with only your carry-on leave to deal with, which was far more manageable.

His mother talks a mile a minute, filling up the conversation enough for the three kg you without needing many interjections. Daniel adds an aside here and there as she updates him about the rest of the family, and she leans over with a kind smile, cutting you off where you're mid-yawn, mentioning how excited the rest of the family is to see you. Ducking your head to hide your embarrassed smile, you murmur about being excited to be back too, and she doesn't seem to require much more from you for the rest of the conversation, for which you're grateful; you're adjusting back to the Australian heat, and are still pretty tired, and at the very least she was good at recognizing and adapting to that.

Once at the car her chatter dies down as she pops the boot of the car and loads both your suitcases in. After a moment, she turns, sizing you both up, giving you a look you can't quite describe, before she wraps Daniel in a tight hug. He leans into it, hugging her back tightly, and then she's moving over to you, holding you just as tight as she did her son. It means something, like you're safe, like you're home, like something else sentimental you can't quite describe. You hug her back.

And then she's off again, shutting the boot and unlocking the rest of the car.

"You know, I'm so proud of you, Danny, but I always worry when you're away, I'm your mother, it's my job." She laughs a little and gets in the driver's seat, while you and Daniel climb in the back; he's in the middle, leaning forward a little to talk to his mother, and you're by the window seat, arm tucked into his as you look out the window to the parking garage, thoughts still a tired, hazy fog. "America's such a terrible place to be right now." His mother goes on to say, and neither of you in the back disagree, but then Daniel's off and talking about his next project that's set to start filming in Adelaide soon.

You're halfway out kg Sydney before his mother suggests getting something to eat, stopping for dinner since home was still a few hours away. Daniel stifles a yawn, waves her off with a smile saying you'd been fed on the plane. His mother makes a face at that, makes a comment about the quality of plane food, and though neither you nor Daniel necessarily disagree, you're too worn out to enjoy a restaurant meal. Taking one look at the both of you in the rear view mirror, his mother softens on the matter and agrees, gently assuring you that there would be food at home.

It takes time to get out of the rat race that is Sydney traffic at peak hour, and by the time you're on the first stretch of the M1 bound for home, the sun is well and truly sinking below the horizon, painting the landscape between the trees golden.

There's a dreamlike unreality to Australian highways at sunset, and when conversation dies down and his mother turns on the radio, you bask in it.

"I like coming back here with you," Daniel's voice is quiet. You're leaving against him, tucked into his side with your head on his shoulder, enjoying the world through the windshield where it's looking like an expressionist painting through your half closed eyes.

You hum, giving his arm a squeeze and turning to press a kiss to his shoulder in lieu of a real answer.

"You two are so cute," you can hear the smile in his mother's voice, can see the way her eyes crease with her grin as she glances back at you in the rear view mirror. You can't help but snicker, pressing your faintly embarrassed grin into his shoulder. Daniel's turning a little red.

"Thanks, Mrs Webber," you laugh sleepily, and Daniel presses a kiss to the top of your head.

"We'll be home in no time, dear," his mother adds, "but if you wanna take a nap, go right ahead."

The world dulls around you as you let your eyes drift closed, heeding her advice. Daniel and his mother's side chatter becomes as easy to tune out as the radio as you drift to sleep going down the highway.

When he looks down, sees you napping soundly, even in this less than ideal position, Daniel's heart softens. In a moment, he's got an arm around you, pulling you closer and into a more comfortable position. In your sleep, you make a quiet hum of appreciation.

"Love you," you mumble in your sleep, and he laughs quietly.

"Love you too," he assures, and gets a smile and another pleased him in return.

"Daniel," his mother says with a surprising amount of quiet seriousness once the moment had passed, and for a moment he's worried, though those fears are almost immediately alleviated, "I really like them; I know I don't say this a lot, but I'm proud of who you've turned into as a person, and I'm so glad you're getting to share that with Y/N." She pauses for a minute, grip still firm on the steering wheel add she looks out to the road, but she was smiling gently, "it warms my heart to see you so happy."

There a long moment of silence in which he can't help but grin, holding you a little tighter as he basks in the praise.

“I appreciate that, mum,” he says softly, “because, you know, I really think I made the right choice.”

#daniel webber #daniel webber imagine #daniel webber x reader #the dirt #the dirt cast #the dirt cast imagine #the dirt imagine #the angry lizard writes

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savagegardenforever · 5 years

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Australian music act Savage Garden will always be revered as a commercial tour de force that launched Australian pop music to the stratosphere in 1996, propelled by a series of chart-topping hits from their debut, self titled album followed by their 1999 sophomore release, Affirmation. While tracks like Truly Madly Deeply and I Knew I Loved You would attain significant success breaking through to international markets, there was far more to this group than a seemingly uncanny ability to create pop hits. Darren Hayes and Daniel Jones would be the creative force behind Savage Garden, instrumental in writing and producing their own material, first out of a family home in suburban Brisbane and then a recording studio in Sydney. A shared devotion and love of music and performing would bring the pair together, and a unique collaborative dynamic would lead to the creation of truly eclectic and exciting material.

Hayes would discover a love and passion for music from childhood, crediting Prince’s iconic Purple Rain soundtrack as pivotal in shaping his fascination with music, “I remember I got a walkman for Christmas and I got Purple Rain by Prince and it just changed my life and listening to the stereo mix and it did something to me that music still does to me now. It physically stops me from being able to concentrate.”

Jones similarly, had been immersed in music from an early age and between this constant exposure and his competitive nature, he would learn to play a variety of instruments as he notes, “I was brought up in a household where in one room there was a drum kit and in another room there was a guitar rig and another room there was a bass so I had older brothers in music so I’d walk in and sort of I’d be a little threatened by my brother playing drums better than I would so I’d go in and I’d practice when he wasn’t there. Then I’d go into the guitar and play guitar and so this was at the age of about 10, even earlier on the keyboard so I guess I’ve always known that I would do music and I survived on it throughout my late teens in pub bands and things like that so it was just a matter of time before I found something that I could really sit with and go okay, I’m going to work this as hard as I can.”

As would be reflected in the sonic eclecticism of Savage Garden’s catalogue, both Hayes and Jones would be influenced by contrasting styles growing up. Darren cited the importance and influence of pop music, “I’d have to say that I definitely was a pop fan because I grew up, you know, I was born in 1972 and I watched the whole pop thing happen. I think that the album that changed my life wasn’t The Beatles, it was Prince’s Purple Rain m y’know, Duran Duran. “Pretty in Pink” was one of my favourite teen films, so yeah, I was living and breathing the whole Flu-Row experience, I guess.”

Jones would find himself immersed in different genres, that would lead to this fusion in style evident in the group’s work. He further elaborates, “Pop definitely not all the time for me. I went through a phase of ska and punk, “oi!” music for a while there when I was a teenager, but what that did is open up a lot of various types of influences throughout my music.”

While Darren would exude a natural and playful confidence as the un-official front-man during the duo’s electric live performances, he discussed how attending Michael Jackson’s Bad Tour in Brisbane would greatly influence his aspirations to be a performer, “It was Brisbane, 1987 and by a crazy stroke of luck I ended up front row for ‘The Bad Tour’ and I witnessed him at the absolute Olympian peak of his prowess. He would move one finger and the entire arena would scream. I looked around that room and I knew I was going to do that some day. I wanted to lift the energy of a room when I walked into it and I wanted to take people away from the sadness of life and into a dream world. That night, I stopped being a fan and I observed him as a student. He’s still my hero.”

Hayes would continue to nurture this element of his personality growing up as he notes, “I was at university I did a lot of moonlighting in theatre productions and different plays. I was expected to be a doctor or lawyer but I left university one month before the end of my course. My parents were livid, my father thought that I was completely mad, but now he’s our biggest fan.”

While Hayes and Jones had clear aspirations to work in the music industry as performers, they would not meet until 1993 via an ad posted by Jones looking for a singer in his band. Darren elaborates, “Daniel was in a band called Red Edge in Brisbane, they had a lot of interest from a record company but they were looking for a new singer. I saw their advert in the Aussie NME saying ‘Serious singer wanted.’ The pair would first speak over the phone with Hayes eventually auditioning in person for the position. He recollected on the experience further, “It was the first audition I ever went to. Um… when I spoke to him (Daniel) on the phone, I clicked, and even after the audition, I remember leaving his house, I went to a restaurant with a friend of mine and I actually said to her, “I think that I’m gonna be really successful. Like I can feel it in my bones. Just from meeting this person.”

Darren would be successful in joining the band, however, it was clear that there was chemistry between both Hayes and Jones that would form a deviating musical output. Daniel elaborates, “I instantly thought it would be interesting to work with him. I liked his personality and his input towards the songs and I thought he had a really nice voice. After being in different bands for about a year, we decided to write a couple of songs together on our own. That’s how Savage Garden started.” By 1994, Hayes and Jones had parted from Red Eye and began writing material as a duo tentatively titled, Crush. The writing and recording of these early tracks were done at Jones’ suburban home prior to the pair’s signing with a record label. Daniel recollects, “Darren would come round to my house everyday and we’d try and write songs. They were some of the best times I’ve ever had ‘coz it was a real challenge. We even soundproofed my bedroom with a load of mattresses so it felt like a proper recording studio!”

Hayes’ and Jones’ collaborative relationship was based on a healthy competitive nature. This was combined with a clear admiration and appreciation for each other’s particular strengths in the process of song writing and composing. Darren elaborates, “I mean, Daniel doesn’t do lyrics. He wouldn’t even touch melodies- not his thing. Likewise I’m not interested in spending a day behind a keyboard working out the EQ on a drum kit. We have to work round each other a lot, But I think it helps make what we do much, much better.” Daniel shared a similar sentiment, “I’m his instrument! He would say, “Let’s try that!” and hum something and I would put it into musical terms. For most of the time though, I’ll conic up with music first. Darren is perhaps more the lyric man. I do what Darren can’t do and Darren does what I can’t do.”

The competition between the pair of who could create the more impressive piece of music would also be a significant factor in fostering the exciting material that would come from their collaboration. Darren elaborates, “I think it’s with fondness that we remember writing songs and recording songs because it’s never a struggle. It’s never a battle. It’s just “here, I’ve done this”… and it… it’s a little game almost. We try to top each other. Daniel will write a piece of music and it’s like, oh my God, it threatens me because it’s better than anything we’ve done so I’ll go “Okay” and I’ll have to go away. And I come up with something that’s better than than ever, and then, so I might come up with a song lyrically that just blows him out of the water and the melody’s really quick and he’ll go, “Well, have a go at this.” And then he’ll pull Carry On Dancing out of the hat and just show me that.”

One of the earliest tracks written and recorded by the pair at Jones’ home-turned recording studio is the ecstatic, A Thousand Words, which would appear on the group’s debut album a few years later. The track begins with eerie synths before launching into a funky mix of loose guitar riffs, a subtle bass line and stabbing keys embellished by a subtle guitar line. Hayes recollected on the origin of the track, The first track Daniel and I wrote and finished together was A Thousand Words. And it was funny, I remember sitting in his front room and we said, “Let’s… we’re gonna do this, let’s write some songs” and he said “What do you want to do?” And I said, “I’ve been working on this song” and I pulled out the chords to Right On Time by… uh… that band, whatever that was (Daniel: Nightclubs… ) really simple house song and y’know and sang this different melody over the top, thinking I could fudge it, and Daniel said, “Eh, well, you know, we could go that way, but a zillion bands have, y’know, what do you actually want to do?” We started talking about music and I was really into Achtung Baby by U2 at the time and, I don’t know, Daniel was a big fan of INXS and Seal, I guess. But he pulled out a chord progression, which is the chord progression in this song and I pulled out a like a Manchester kind of beat to go over the top of it, and it became… it filled the room. I remember thinking, “Wow, this is the most full, you know, piece of music I’ve ever heard in my life.” And when I look back now, Daniel probably thought it was really simple, but for me, it was the most musical thing I’d ever seen or heard.”

While the pair’s compositions would continue to develop and evolve, A Thousand Words is a demonstration of the clear talent and sophistication in Jones’ musical ability, creating a vibrant and interesting sonic landscape with pop sensibilities. The composition would also be an indication of the fusion of various genres and sounds that would continue to be evident throughout the band’s catalogue. Between the funk elements evident in the percussion, contrasted with the prominent guitar riff reminiscent of rock, with pop chord progressions, it’s clear that the pair’s genre-crossing inspirations would be evident in their music.

On top of this composition, Hayes’ details the breakdown of a relationship with the lyrics, using his exceptional ability as a songwriter to paint vivid, visual images:

We stumble in a tangled web Decaying friendships almost dead And hide behind a mask of lies We twist and turn and we avoid All hope and salvage now devoid I see the truth behind your eyes

Darren elaborates on the writing of the track, “One of the two songs about conflict in relationships. This track is a very personal snapshot of a real life argument and a play on linguistics and twisted meanings. The rhythm section of Terapie Richmond and Alex Hewitson take the track beyond its original Manchester feel and make it alive, grunting and believable.”

The exciting result of the developing song was vital in instilling confidence in the pair and encouraged them to continue to create music as Jones notes, “We were so confident after that, that we just decided to come back to each other’s house every day. And really that’s all this band has been. It’s just a decision for both of us to keep coming back every day and keep doing it.” In a retrospective interview after the release of Savage Garden’s debut album, Daniel discussed the recording of the track further and the special distinction it holds on the album, “A Thousand Words is a song… that was… it was the virgin song. It was the first song that happened. I still think you can see Darren and I learning about each other in listening to that song. It’s.. that was sitting there sort of like looking up at Darren and looking up at Daniel and the songs can say different things to each of us. But I think it’s great that it’s on our first record because it means a lot in that way.”

As the pair continued to write and record in suburban Brisbane, a reflective night at a local bar would lead Jones to compose what would become one of the most important and iconic tracks in Savage Garden’s catalogue. He elaborates, “Like a lot of Australians I was up the pub on a Friday night, I was maybe eighteen or nineteen… I’m like “you know what, I don’t belong in this pub”… I walked home…I got home and I started composing what ultimately became the whole To The Moon And Back. From the start of the intro, to the guitars, to the chorus, to the little melodies in there, the orchestral piano string ending. I remember going, “this is going to be my ticket that’s gonna stop me from having to go back to that pub and drink.”

Daniel would present an early composition to Darren as he developed lyrics to accompany this atmospheric instrumental. Hayes elaborates, “This was one of the first songs Daniel and I wrote together. It was a beautiful, space-like instrumental that Daniel had been working on for quite a while. He showed it to me and I took it away to work on the melody and lyrics. The song came together very quickly. We recorded the song and included it on our first demo tape.”

The lyrics would resonate with Daniel in particular as he noted a parallel in his own emotional state with Darren’s lyrical inspiration, “It’s a strange metaphor for me but that song saved me, as well as when Darren contribute his lyrical story to it. It floored me even more so because it was a very personal subject for him about a friend of his, that probably wasn’t that dissimilar to me in the sense that they were lost.”

By 1995, Crush had been renamed Savage Garden as an ode to a passage in the novel, The Vampire Chronicles by Anne Rice to which Hayes was a big fan of the author. The pair had recorded enough material to produce a demo tape that they began dispersing to various record labels to no success. It’s estimated that Hayes and Jones sent out approximately 150 copies with all but one rejection. John Wordruff who previously had success managing Australian groups, Icehouse and The Angels was excited by the material he had heard. This early incarnation of To The Moon And Back had the record buff particularly excited, as he noted, “It was pretty much as it ended up on the album. Obviously a bit rougher but it came from a home studio but the same vocal, same arrangement. Much as we were in the middle of the grunge era, and I managed rock bands, it was pretty undeniable.”

Beyond the material however, Wordruff was confident in a partnership after meeting Hayes and Jones as he recollects, “I thought they were brilliant. I thought the discussions we had together was some of the most honest and frank — albeit somewhat naïve from their perspective that I ever had with a new artist. That was what got me even more so than the music. I was still debating that with myself, because the closest thing to a pop band that I had ever looked after before was Icehouse.” John would become the pair’s manager and presented the demo tape to two major record labels, both of which passed. This disappointment would not last, however, as Wordruff was able to negotiate a contract with label Roadshow/Warner music and after the success of the pair’s first single, I Want You, Hayes and Jones entered the studio to work on Savage Garden’s debut album. The pair were finally seeing traction as they went from Jones’ Brisbane home to a recording studio in Sydney.

While the pair had up until this time, written and arranged each aspect of their music on their own, Charles Fisher would be brought in to produce the album with Hayes and Jones. Fisher had previously produced various other Australian bands including Air Supply. Beyond producing the album with Hayes and Jones, Fisher would also provide mentorship to the pair who were only freshly immersed into the professional recording space. Charles recollected on when he first heard the pair’s demos, “When I first heard it, there was one song that I thought was magnificent, and that was a song called To The Moon And Back. It was so good, I thought anyone who could write that, could write They hadn’t done much recorded beyond the primitive demos they had done in their own home, so there was a lot of education involved in getting them to do what I thought needed to be done.”

With a professional recording studio at their disposal and an experienced producer alongside them, Hayes and Jones began to record new material and develop the early demos they had recorded in Brisbane. It’s important to note that the pair had delivered demos that while primitive had featured the vital melodies and progressions that would be instrumental in completing the finished tracks. Fisher elaborated further, “The songs were there, the structure was there, we really just had to come up with a bit of a sound to the whole thing cos it was just Darren and Daniel. It was all very simplistic in the demo stage so we had to blow it up a little bit but the songs were there, and when you have the material, the rest is easy.”

This sentiment is evident on a number of tracks, including the early demo of To The Moon And Back. The melody and chord progressions are clear and evident from this early incarnation, however some aspects of the instrumentation differ from the completed track. The subtle, but infectious bass-line and the light, airy synth lines during the verses remain intact, however, many of the futuristic keyboard sounds would be removed and replaced with multiple guitar riffs. The percussion would similarly be replaced with a more live and acoustic drum pattern. Jones’ sublime keyboard coda during the outro is also evident with dramatic synths eventually being replaced by the string arrangement that would be featured on the completed track. An acoustic Spanish style guitar solo would also be added into the bridge giving the track a more contemporary feel. A number of sound effects would also be filled throughout the track to compliment the imagery of the lyrics. Darren recollected on the re-recording of the song, “One thing we didn’t say about To The Moon And Back was the fact that it was incredibly hard to record because the demo was so…perfect. It was a really simple song and it had out of key singing in the demo had cheap keyboard sounds, but it was so believable. And that’s the reason why everyone hooked on that song. And recording To The Moon And Back, we really tried to jazz it up, change it, and make it this and make it that and we almost lost it. I think we only just got To The Moon And Back.”

With the new-found budget and opportunities that came with this record deal, the duo were able to employ the Sydney Symphony Orchestra to record the string arrangement featured during the climatic finale of the track. Hayes elaborated on the outro further, “It I was a huge Bjork fan and I always love songs that kinda came back for a revamp so from a structural part of view, it was a much different song. At the same time, we were worried that it might be too serious, I could never tell if it would be a hit or not.” The sublime outro is a perfect intertwine of Jones exceptional keyboard skills present on the demo, contrasted with the dramatic tone of the heavy string arrangements.

Coupled with this stellar composition, there was a maturity and sophistication to the lyrics that would separate Savage Garden from other contemporary pop acts. Hayes perfectly compliments the visceral composition with lyrics filled with various metaphors, creating a distinct and atmospheric visual imagery. Darren elaborates, “I guess it carried a weight to it and maybe a maturity that we didn’t really have at that time but were hoping to be.” Daniel similarly notes, “I wanted people to understand that yes this is a pop band, but it was an intellectual pop band… yes we have pop melodies, yes, we have pop progressions but we’re saying something lyrically here that’s a little more clever than “oh I want you.”

The first track to be developed at the Sydney studio with Fisher as their new collaborator is the funky Violet. The pair brought with them a sparse, but compelling demo with the melody clearly established and propelled by an infectious synth and bass line. Prominent keys and a snare drum would give the song a catchiness and energy complimented by Hayes’ quirky lyrics, detailing the “disco in one’s mind.” The sessions took some time to get traction as Jones noted, “It was actually a really hard song to record cause it was our first one. Darren and I had just flown down to Sydney, just met with this producer called Charles Fisher, walked into the studio, and all looked at each other and said “Where do we start?” And one of us said “Violet.” (sighs) And about a month later, we actually got something happening on Violet. That’s how long it took before we actually got something moving in the studio.” While all the key elements were already evident in the pair’s demo, Fisher would begin to put his own touches on the track, polishing and adjusting certain elements of the composition. In particular, Charles would take the infectious bass line and add various effects to distort and compress the sound. As Jones notes, “Great idea from Charles of the bass line came out in the studio, um, just started distorting it, made it really fuzzy, funky, blues…this song’s got everything.” Hayes similarly recollected on how the song began to take shape with the irresistible bass line, “It moves and jumps now, and it’s fat and fuzzy and very funky and as soon as that happened, the whole song just came alive and then we were lucky enough to have Rex Goh and come in and play some fantastic guitar on the track.”

Goh would add some bluesy guitar riffs to embellish the track further, adding to the sonic landscape and complimenting the metallic clang of the prominent snare drum. Jones discussed how Fisher’s advice would be instrumental in providing the pair with perspective when creating these vibrant compositions, “Charles’ motto would be “Less is more.” And it was a perfect motto to have, for Darren and I, because we like to feel things out. We liked as much as we can put down, we’ll put it down. Um..and we needed someone like Charles to go, “Okay, think about this, guys, why do you actually want to do this? You don’t have to if you do this.” And it was as simple as that. And we’d go, “Yeah, great idea.”

There is an energy to Violet that while clearly evident on the demo would be magnified and heightened with the adding of various subtle but key instruments. Darren discussed further, “It reminds me of the energy that you hear in a Prince track or Need You Tonight by INXS. There’s just something about it. It has a sonic quality that just… it bubbles and pops.” The pair would spend a significant amount of time with Fisher developing the track from the demo to the completed product as Darren notes, “We actually shelved it halfway through and thought well, hang on. You know, spent copious amounts of time working on the rhythm loop and the bass line, just trying to make it work, and in the end the solution was really simple.”

Other tracks would experience a more radical change in sound as they were being developed in the studio. One such example is the vibrant, Tears Of Pearls. The genesis of the song deviated from the usual collaborative process between Hayes and Jones, with Darren taking a role in the creation of the composition.

Jones elaborates, “I remember feeling like I was writing a song that Darren would want to write. That happened for time to time with the pair of us. I’d give him some lyrical suggestions and say,“Look I really want to write a song about this or about that”, and I think Tears Of Pearls for me, was a song I was writing because he was asking me to write this type of song. Nearly literally, like kind of going “can you do this beat?…And I was literally carving it out in front of him going, “Is this what you mean?” The early demo would be more so reminiscent of electronic music compared to the completed track with a plethora of pulsing synths behind a deep computerised drumbeat. This initial mix would include a slightly different melody with a synth line appearing throughout that would eventually be dropped. The pair would return to Tears Of Pearls in their Sydney recording studio alongside Fisher to re-vamp the production. Hayes elaborates, “We were never really that keen on it, and it changed a lot during the recording process, and Charles Fisher did a wonderful job of producing. Just the little things in that track like there’s a string line which is in unison with my melody. There’s a glockenspiel in the chorus. It was all very Diana Ross and The Supremes, Motown kind of production values which we’d talked a little bit about. it’s nice. It’s a got a real Eastern feel to it now in the guitar solos and I think it’s quite exciting.”

Many of the keyboard synths would be removed from this final mix and the drumbeat would be replaced with a pattern more reminiscent of dance music as opposed to electronic. Similarly, strings would once again be inserted throughout the track, most notably during the sublime bridge, swelling and dramatic while recalling elements of the string section in Upside Down by Diana Ross. A pulsing bass line would also be evident during the final mix alongside an organ solo. Fisher would also include eastern style guitar riffs into the track to give it a more exotic and fuller sound. Jones similarly recollected on the evolution of the track, “It sort of popped up in the recording process, and it was a few people’s favourites within their companies, and Charles and the people that we were dealing with. I just didn’t know where it had come from. It’d come out of nowhere. But I did like the change that it took in the recording session with the Eastern feel, the guitar riffs and the intros. It was sort of a technical thing, and one of the bottom E string was actually tuned to a D.. um… I think accidentally. And it was actually sounded a little sitar-y like, and it worked.”

The influence of pop superstars and some of Hayes’ musical idols would be evident in the sound of Tears Of Pearls, with the artist attempting to create a track that could be performed live with theatricality. He describes further, “I always had an obsession with New-Wave and big pop stars and even though I didn’t listen to Duran Duran as a fan as a kid, when the 90’s happened, I started the 80’s obsession. I was a hipster retro-ist from the very beginning; I really missed the new wave era. I was into Michael, I wasn’t into Duran, I was into George Michael, I wasn’t into Morrisey So, I think there was definitely a camp theatrical nature to the whole movement that I didn’t experience and I mined very heavily I think as a style…I think Tears Of Pearls was a very definite and obvious attempt on our part to really be camp, be theatrical. Create this almost bourgeois sound.”

The inclusion of string instruments in many of the pair’s compositions would become one of the defining sounds of a Savage Garden production. Mine would be one of the first tracks in which Jones would include string arrangements to replace what were originally synths on the pair’s early demo. This transition from prominent synths to the sweeping and swirling strings that would be evident in the final mix brings further intensity to the composition. Jones elaborates, “I really enjoyed working with the strings. It was one of the first songs that I had sort of thought about doing a string arrangement, in some of the string breakdowns and what not. And I really, thoroughly enjoyed it… I really enjoyed bringing out… emotion within the stringed instrument world.” Besides the strings, the various percussive elements are another integral element that conjures the atmospheric composition. Between the deep bass and various drum effects, the pair place a delay on the instruments to form a unique contrast and interplay. Hayes elaborates, “You Could Be Mine is, it’s a song that’s really, musically, all about delay. It started off with a bass line and a drumbeat, which delayed, and subsequently every instrument just had to be delayed too… Every instrument is cycling through a delay in its own time, creating a swirling continuous swell that culminates in the instruments finally locking together.” Hayes lyrics detail an obsessive desire for the unattainable; a common lyrical theme that would appear on a number of the pair’s tracks and perfectly compliments Jones’ dramatic composition.

This element of a grand and theatrical sound would be evident on a number of tracks being worked on for the group’s debut album. Another such example is the kinetic, Carry On Dancing. The track is once again inspired by Hayes’ love with Anne Rices’ novel series, The Vampire Chronicles. Darren described the intended visual imagery of the track, “The scene is just before midnight … a full moon at a masquerade ball … avant-garde strings, timpani and even castanets create the gothic feel of the song, inspired by Anne Rice’s vampire chronicles. The feel is grandiose and theatrical.” Jones would fill the track with distinct synths that would carry the melody, while also recalling the dramatic tone of string arrangements. The prominence of keyboard throughout the track in conjunction with the clattering drum fills, would give the song a distinct electronic sound, noted by Hayes in the removed lyric, “It’s something more than a techno beat.” As the pair worked with Fisher in the studio, the track would see an expansion in sound as the synths were replaced with the luscious and sweeping string arrangements that would define the completed song. While there is a clear progression between the pair’s sparse demo and the vibrant mix created in the studio a year later, this isn’t so much an overhaul as an expansion and fulfilment of Jones’ creative vision with the resources of a professional studio. Daniel recollected on the evolution of the track, “Carry On Dancing…very grand, very avant-garde, very over-the-top. Expels a lot of Darren’s inner personality. I love the combination of strings and pianos. In the recording process, we managed to get some timpani samples and some castanets and what not, so we just tried to make this bigger than life.“ Darren similarly recollected on his thoughts hearing the completed mix, “I remember hearing the finished mix and it was bigger than I’d hoped it could get. It was just um it just feels so grandiose; I think that’s a good word for it. When I hear it, I see things like a masquerade ball in the 18th century and a werewolf or a vampire perhaps outside stalking the people inside.” Carry On Dancing would be an example of just how integral Hayes and Jones’ early demos would be in shaping the sound of what would become the grand completed tracks.

The electric pop classic, I Want You which would become a breakout single for Savage Garden would go through an extensive development before it’s completion and release. Beginning as an early demo entitled Today…A Bad Day, the pair would extract key elements from this early version as they created what would become the classic track. Hayes elaborates, “I Want You had so many different incarnations. I think it was a demo called Today…A Bad Day and there was just something in the sound of that demo that was worth keeping.” While the basic elements of the song were developed and recorded in quick succession, the track would be put on hold before resurfacing later in the sessions. Darren recollects, “It just seemed to happen. I remember coming back the next day in the little room out in the front and sort of singing it. It was really quickly written, to be honest. I mean, we… I think I sang this song 2 days before we flew to Sydney to record the record. And we had it on TDK tape, just on a TDK tape. And it was the least produced or finished demo that we had for this record and was, in fact, almost shelved. It was.. we tentatively put it up for selection, and it was politely looked at but sort of sat by the wayside. But by the time we recorded about 8 tracks, I guess we just slipped it in and somehow it was assumed that we’d record this one and it, it seemed to turn out really well.”

Hayes sings of waking from an erotic dream and the pursuit to replicate the feeling once again. He fills the lyrics with surreal metaphors and similes, intricate wordplay and eccentric thoughts behind the sound of a thumping beat. Darren elaborated on the writing process for the track, “It is a nonsensical song. It’s a song about a dream that I had and it’s a song that lyrically, really my voice is like a bass instrument in that song. It’s just stuttering along like a rhythm instrument and so the symbols will come first and the lyrics were something that I did pour through a thesaurus and I did look through my dictionary. I thought of as many colourful, fantastic adjectives and analogies that I could use to describe this thing.” Jones similarly recollects, “The original idea was very simple: to use the voice as a rhythm instrument — cramming in as many syllables as possible into one phrase.”

Hayes’ unique vocal delivery evident during the verses would not only add to the compelling instrumental but also give the track a distinctive personality. Jones elaborated on this further, “It was easier for Darren to sing the faster the tempo because he didn’t have to hold his breath so long which was quite ironic because it’s already a very fast vocally song… The fact that he was pushing it to go faster cos it made it easier for him, it’s all part of the particular magic of that song.” In contrast to the verses, the chorus is particularly simple but effortlessly catchy. Darren elaborates on how it developed, “I guess that idea for that chorus, it was really a background vocal, there was no lyric… that became a chorus. I remember being very precious about lyrics and very overly detailed. One of the brilliant things that Daniel does is he sees the forest for the trees and he just said to me “What about something really simple? Why don’t you just have a simple chorus?’ and that’s where the lyric I Want You came from.” One of the most compelling aspects of this chorus are the luscious vocal harmonies that create a perfect interplay with Hayes’ lead vocals, adding warmth to the already vibrant vocals. Jones elaborates, “The recording process really bought the song alive. The simple vocal in the chorus became a bed of 12 voices. Six of Darren’s and six of session singers that we sank very low in the mix to give the chorus the thick layer of vocals that you hear.” Darren continues, “I’m really proud of just the production value and I love the blend of the vocals. There’s about 12 vocals in the chorus, all double-tracked and harmonised. And the vocal in the verse is so fast and so intricate and it always seems to fascinate people, and I like it.”

The brilliant composition is just as eccentric and captivating as the lyrics, anchored by pounding bass, spacey synths, a clashing snare and a subtle but essential guitar riff. With Fisher at the helm as the track was nearing completion, it was clear that I Want You had great potential as a first single. Daniel recollected on hearing the completed mix in the studio, “When we played it in the studio in Melbourne after it had been mixed, we spent all day on the mix and they played it as loud as they could through the biggest system in the studio. It was that moment where you felt it and heard it and everything seemed to have all come together on that particular song. It was probably then, no one knew who we were at this point… I saw myself being able to perform to hundreds, thousands, if not tens of thousands of people at that particular time because of how powerful this song was from my point of view.” Not only would the track become one of Savage Garden’s most commercially successful songs and help launch them to stardom, but it’s also an example of how tracks would often evolve significantly during the creative process.

Another such example with a more radical shift as the song evolved is the funk-rock track, Break Me Shake Me. Similarly to I Want You, the song developed from a earlier demo entitled Stepping Stone with the songs’ lyrical content being inspired by a fight between Hayes and a close friend. He elaborates, “Nat is my friend I met in grade 3. She was a Madonna fan, I was a Michael Jackson fan and then through high school she used to look like Madonna. I was obsessed with vogue-ing so naturally we were just very close friends. She’s always been there for me and like all good friends, boy have we had fights. And Break Me Shake Me is about one of our fights.” The track would be revised with the lyrics re-written as Darren’s relationship with Nat evolved and no longer became relevant to the conflict expressed on Stepping Stone.

As Darren elaborates, “It was a song called Stepping Stone. And we reconciled after that song and we became friends and everything was fine, but the same sorts of things started to happen to our relationship and subsequently, the song had to be re- written. Because the first song didn’t describe the situation anymore. This is part two of that song. Um… and yeah, it’s schizophrenic. It really is quite crazy. I remember we started recording Stepping Stone and it just didn’t feel right and I started singing a different melody. I started singing the words “I never thought I’d change my opinion again” and Daniel said, “That’s a great melody,” and then we ended up re-writing the song.” It was clear as the track was beginning to take shape that the pair were expanding into a harder rock sound than what they had recorded previously.

A combination of clear inspiration and unadulterated self-expression would be essential in developing the sound of the song. Jones elaborates, “Break Me Shake me was inspired by a combination of the guitarist Steve Stevens who was Billy Idol’s guitarist and Michael Jackson. And I think at that time in our lives when we were writing, I came from 80’s rock music so I was all about 80’s rock, big hair, big guitar… Darren was very, very much into the Michael Jackson super-stardom of the 80’s. And I think when Darren and I were our true selves, Michael Jackson would come out of him and some 80’s rock guitarists would come out of me and thus Break Me Shake Me came out of it.” He continues, “I think I remember writing the bass line and then I remember looking at Darren and he’s doing these finger snaps like Michael Jackson… and the song just started to create itself.”

Between the irresistible bass line and finger snaps that open the track, and the slow build of various forms of percussion including tambourine, Break Me Shake Me is instantly captivating to the listener within the first couple of seconds. The verses are sparse, yet rich, with the composition perfectly complimenting Hayes’ sublime lead and background vocals as he sings with subtle conviction. All of this culminates to what is akin to a sonic explosion during the chorus with heavy guitar and thundering drums propelling Hayes’ intense vocal delivery. The combination of various contrasting guitar styles from the funky Prince-like guitar riff that enters during the second verse, to the hard-rock reminiscent riff that dominates the chorus, adds to this sparse yet layered composition.

Rex Goh would once again lend his talents, performing the aggressive guitar solo featured during the bridge. Darren elaborates, “When Rex Goh played the solo we were jumping out of our skins. Even though it goes all over the place we felt that the solo was perfect. It was a single take and was so angry we just had to keep it.” The pair would revisit this guitar orientated rock sound on other tracks produced during these sessions such as Love Can Move You. Break Me Shake Me demonstrates that there would not be a single genre that would define the sound of Savage Garden as the pair would pursue their own artistic compass and influences, wherever it would take them.

While eclecticism would be a integral aspect of the pair’s work as they bridged and combined a wealth of genres, Hayes would experiment with his own writing style and vocal effects on the magnificently camp, All Around Me. Being the principal lyricist, Darren would deviate from writing about his own personal experiences and look to Daniel for inspiration in writing this funky anomaly. He recollects, “Quirky, freaky, bizarre, fun. Initially it was my attempt, lyrically, to include an aspect of Daniel’s life in our music, Because I felt a bit selfish that I’d taken over certain themes and whatever, and Daniel has an obsession with Meg Ryan, but it’s a healthy one. He loves Meg Ryan very much. And in our little home studio there’s about 14 or 15 pictures of Meg…some of them wall-mounted. One of them from me as a gift to Daniel. And there’s a scene in a Meg Ryan film called “When a Man Loves a Woman” and she’s dancing. And she dances in a certain way and she says the words “stick-on tattoo.” And the way she says those words is the personality of this song. We wrote a song for Meg Ryan to dance to, and it’s all about being obsessed with Meg Ryan.”

Once again Hayes conjures a striking visual imagery with the lyrics complimented by an instrumental recorded by Jones at their home studio. Beginning with a flurry of screeching synths and a variety of drum patterns, the track continues to build an infectious groove propelled by the bass until the bridge, in which Hayes performs a brilliantly quirky rap with his voice pitched up. Darren discussed the inspiration for the eccentric performance, “It’s like being an actor. It’s like performing. It’s doing to your voice what a costume can do to your voice in a stage play. To be honest, really, the only effected part of this song is the rap. And it’s actually the speed of the vocal and it was a mistake. I was stuffing around with the vary speed dial on the multi-track recorder, and I realized that you could change the pitch of your voice. So I um pitched it up a notch, basically. Like it’s pretty close to the normal pitch of my voice, so there’s a hell of a lot of play-acting happening in that rap. Um and when it came back, it sounded like chipmunks on steroids. And I really liked it, so we kept it.”

Hayes would once again revisit this studio technique, on another track recorded during this era, the wonderful, I’ll Bet He Was Cool. As All Around Me continued to be fleshed out during the recording process, certain elements of the composition would be omitted or replaced, giving the track a greater polish and expansion with the inclusion of various instruments. One of the most notable contrasts is the replacement of the synth line carrying the melody with a funky loose guitar riff. The verses would be stripped back to just the infectious bass line, a slapping snare drum and Hayes’ exceptional vocal performance. The amalgamation of various genres and styles present on the track is a testament to the pair’s various influences. As Jones noted, “It’s a very bitty song. The song’s in bits and pieces, and it’s a little funky and a little disco and it’s…there’s hippie elements to the song as well. It’s like computerised hippies.”

This is one of the elements that would make Savage Garden’s output unique in comparison to many of the Australian acts producing music at the time. This exploration into various contrasting genres mixed with a little camp would be evident on tracks like All Around Me. As Daniel elaborates, “They’re songs very strong in melody and I think that you can look at the date that we were born and the music that we grew up listening to and you can see similar structures. I think the ’80s were a time very much like the ’60s in which there is a real focus on melody and I think that’s what we see in our songs but I think more than anything if I could have a career like a band like INXS or U2 because they manage to metamorphosize and change and they’re always relevant but they’re not repeating themselves. I think what we’re doing, this is pop music and by that I mean we’re taking the sum of our influences within pop culture and we react to them and then we make something. We don’t reproduce the past, we react to it and I think that’s what a band like U2 does and that’s what I think Savage Garden would like to do.”

One of the greatest assets of Savage Garden was Hayes’ exceptional and versatile vocal range. Between his sublime and cathartic falsetto and ability to provoke various emotions, it was clear that his exceptional song-writing skills were matched with indisputable vocal talent. This is demonstrated to full effect on the atmospheric ballad Universe. The song began as an instrumental demo developed by Jones based on a prominent guitar riff. He elaborates, “It actually started out… it sounded like Eric Clapton had met Joe Tetriani in a pub and said, “Let’s go home now and write a song.” When it first started, it was a guitar-based… groove. With some sort of, like a, lush sort of keyboards creeping in here and there.” As Hayes began writing lyrics for this early demo, the development of the track headed in a different direction as Darren’s love for RNB and Motown would have an influence on shaping the emerging song. He recalls, “Well, I heard it in a different way. I thought once again, like Moon And Back, I thought it was one of the strongest pieces of music that Daniel had written, at that stage; he’s since eclipsed himself. But at that stage, it really was, and I just had some ideas for a feel and the bass line subsequently changed. It became more Smokey Robinson, I guess. Um… to be honest, we’d been listening to That’s The Way Love Goes by Janet Jackson — I thought it was a fantastic, sexy slow groove and I really wanted to sing a sexy, slow song and that was Universe.”

As evident in the instrumental, which fused a drum beat reminiscent of American slow-jam RNB with the spacey and stark synth line, the pair’s various contrasting influences would help shape the composition. Jones elaborates, “Universe was a little bit of a “we aren’t 100% sure who we are so lets have a go at writing this RNB like, sultry, sexual beautiful song that you’d want to make love to.” And I think it was a little bit of Darren’s RNB flavor that he has and then it was probably fused with my English big –sweep synthesizers and kind of ambient seductive feel. It was really a song that was a bit of an experiment because we were trying to figure out who Savage Garden were at the time because it was undiscovered.”

The inspiration for Darren’s sublime and sensual vocal performance originated from the Motown artists he grew up listening to. Artists such as Diana Ross, Smokey Robinson and others would help shape Hayes’ vocal identity and the iconic falsetto that would become synonymous with the group. Hayes recollects, “When everyone else was listening to Duran Duran and Cyndi Lauper and new-wave pop, I was listening to Motown records. I was listening to Marvin Gaye, The Temptations, I was understanding who Smokey Robinson was. And I think that helped me develop a falsetto voice. A lot of the time I was imitating these artists and I couldn’t sing and I was a male and a lot of them were females or had high voices like Smokey Robinson, so I would just imitate them not understanding at all what I was doing and that was called falsetto…I just hit the notes, I didn’t understand how or why but that influence was ingrained in me and Universe was really the first time I let that stuff out. In my mind I guess I thought I was singing Sexual Healing or Tears Of A Clown or something. It was definitely an homage to or an unconscious release of those crooners that I listened to in the Motown era.”

While Fisher would be brought in to polish the track during the album sessions, engineer Mike Pela who had previously worked with artists such as Sade and Maxwell would also contribute to mixing the track alongside Tears Of Pearls. Pela would bring an international influence, enhancing the RNB and soul elements of the track. Darren notes, “It was finished and recorded and mixed by Chris Lord-Alge, and we really liked it. We were really happy with it. When we went to America, the Americans had an idea for it and they really wanted to see if they could change it. Um…and it was given to Mike Pela, who’s done a lot of work with Sade, Fine Young Cannibals, and when he came back with the finished track, it sounded like a Smokey Robinson song. It was really, really ironic that it would go that way.” It’s not hard to see why a song like Universe could have appeared quite easily alongside the RNB landscape that dominated the 90’s. Between the drumbeat and the infectious bass line, coupled with guitar riff embellishments, the composition is warm and a perfect companion to Hayes’ seductive vocal performance.

As the recording sessions were nearing completion and Savage Garden’s debut album was beginning to take shape, an impromptu trip to America would birth one of the key ballads that would feature on the record. The pair were originally planning to fly to London for the final mixing process however due to budget restrictions, this didn’t eventuate. As mixing was instead relocated to Australia, Hayes would use the money he had saved to take a trip to Los Angeles. A few days in Santa Monica would give Darren the inspiration to write the sublime ballad. Hayes recollects, “By the time we got to the end of the trip we were in Santa Monica for two days. Well I fell in love with it and I remember walking around the third street promenade and I went home and wrote these lyrics to this song.”

The feeling of alienation and isolation that came from being immersed in a foreign country and environment would form a central theme to the developing lyrics. Darren elaborated on the lyrical inspiration further, “It really was written about Santa Monica, about feeling so out of place in a new city but seeking comfort behind the mask of a telephone. We were just getting into the Internet and we found it interesting how in cyberspace you are only as interesting as your mind. You can be anything you want to be. So sitting in a cafe in Santa Monica on day, this strange thought came into being.”

While the verses detail an observational account of Santa Monica with references to coffee shops and skate boarders, Hayes also touches on the displacement of being an outsider as he contemplates and questions, “What am I doing here?” As evident on the lyrics featured in the chorus, he finds salvation in the fact that through cyberspace and Internet, he can control his own perception and image to seemingly fit into any situation.

Beauty so unavoidable Everywhere you turn It’s there I sit and wonder what am I doing here?

But on the telephone line I am anyone I am anything I want to be I could be a supermodel or Norman Mailer And you wouldn’t know the difference Or would you?

Hayes discussed the meaning of the track further, “It’s funny because it, it’s, it really has captured for me just a sense of uncertainty we were feeling or I was feeling at the time of the record. It ties in… my American.. reaction and my experiences with America as a first-timer and for me, just hints at a little bit about the public mask that we’ve started to put on and how through the telephone or through my computer or on the internet I can hide behind something and I can be anything I want to be and you wouldn’t know the difference. And that’s that song.”

As Darren returned to Australia, he would bring the idea to Jones and the pair would develop the track further. Hayes elaborates, “We had finished recording the record, and I was walking along, and the, the pace of my walk probably set the tempo of the song. And the chorus came straight away. The chorus, melody and the lyric was there, I sang into the tape deck and I went back to Daniel and said, “Look, I’ve got this song. I think it’s really, really good,” and played it. Um… but I… there was no verse progression at all. And so Daniel played a progression and I started singing over that and it just came really easily.

The song would be recorded back in Australia and mixed by Daniel’s brother. The composition is warm yet also somewhat melancholic with an emphasis on keys and a subtle floating synth line present during the verses. The inclusion of various minor guitar riffs would add further depth to the composition. It was clear that the track was truly magical however it was not intended to be included on the final configuration of the album. This however, would change as the track listing was being finalised.

Interestingly, Savage Garden’s most successful track to come from their debut album would be recorded as the last song during these sessions. The iconic ballad Truly Madly Deeply evolved from an earlier demo entitled Magical Kisses recorded by the pair years earlier. The track was faster in tempo, brighter in composition and featured a different chorus. While the prominent keys that would define the ballad were evident on this early version, they would be accompanied by an assortment of flourishing synths that would eventually be removed as the song evolved. There’s a significant contrast in tone between Magical Kisses and what would become Truly Madly Deeply; somewhat a reflection of the pair’s circumstances at the time. Hayes recollected, “It’s strange, this one, because before we recorded the record, it was a very different song. It was faster, it had a completely different chorus. And during the process of recording the record, I guess we changed a lot. We’d been relocated to Sydney. We were there for 8 months. It was the first time either of us had really left our families. Um… we were living in a one-bedroom apartment, on each other’s case every day. It was quite a stressful situation, and it was the last song that we recorded for the record. And I think, we talk about this now, even though it’s a love song and it’s based on a very personal experience, it’s still a song about being homesick for us actually, just about the people that you love.”

While the pair saw potential in Magical Kisses, Jones had reservations about the heavy pop sound of the chorus. He elaborates, “One of those days when Darren and I relationship was being tested on a creative level. I remember kind of nearly begging with Darren to change the title of the song and to actually re-work and look at the chorus because for me at the time, it just didn’t sit right with the sound of what Savage Garden was becoming. We had this very pop song with a very pop chorus called Magical Kisses so it didn’t sit right for me and Darren, God bless him was understanding enough to re-work the chorus and he sat down and said, “what about this?”

A trip to a Sydney café would give Hayes the inspiration to re-write the chorus as he elaborates, “I remember I wrote the chorus in I think it’s called Bayswater Brasserie on Bayswater Road, Sydney… um over a cappuccino and we actually had a keyboard and everything set up on in the hotel and I went back and we sort of sang the song. And it just seemed right. And suddenly this song was a much more credible, believable song than Magical Kisses had ever been, and it was because it was from the heart.” As Darren presented this new poetic chorus to Jones, it was clear that this was the element needed to elevate Magical Kisses to something truly extraordinary. Jones wouldn’t be the only one to be instantly receptive to this re-write as Hayes recollects, “I wrote the melody in my head because it was a completely different chorus previously. I went into the studio the next day; I was recording my own vocals. Charles was in another room and I said “I’ve got this idea for that song, let me just try something.” Recorded it and I think he said immediately, “that’s a number one single.”

The composition would also see a significant overhaul, with the tempo being slowed down dramatically. Jones recollected on how this alteration occurred, “There was a day when Charles and I were just hanging around, not really doing much in the studio, and uh, we had this song, Tru — uh… Magical Kisses it was called and we wanted to play around with it a little bit. And we found a loop from some CD there and it was like really slow, and we were trying to put it to this track and it just wasn’t working. So we said, “Well, why don’t we slow the whole song down so it fits this loop?” And that was the way it sort of ended up getting, you know, half the speed that, that it started out with. And it was a bonus. It just came out of nowhere. A definite bonus.”

By the time Magical Kisses had evolved into Truly Madly Deeply the composition would be noticeably sparser, with focus on the keys and a prominent acoustic drum loop. Hayes would also add incredibly luscious vocal harmonies during the chorus, adding warmth to the already whimsical lyrics. Both Darren and Daniel would cite the track as being one of the strongest produced during the final weeks of this ten-month long recording session, and thus it would be highly considered for a place on the impending album. Darren elaborates, “It was intended to be a very quiet, down-key finish to the record. And that’s how we tried to produce it. And during the recording process, it just showed itself as a much stronger track, and uh… when we looked at the finished record, we realized it was probably one of the strongest tracks on there.”

If there’s one word to describe the body of work produced by the pair alongside Fisher, it’s eclecticism. The sheer scope of Jones’ musicality and Hayes’ lyrical depth on early demos and both album and non-album tracks alike, demonstrate clear ambition and no set of rules. Between the glitzy funk of Memories Are Designed To Fade and the harder rock sound of Love Can Move You, there’s an element of experimentation that exudes from these various efforts. Hayes would similarly explore lyrical themes relating to his struggle with sexual identity on the haunting B-Side to Truly Madly Deeply, This Side Of Me. Early demos such as Tell Me It’s Ok recall elements of Culture Club and In This Lifetime, industrial new-wave.

Another track worked on during these sessions that remained unreleased for many years is the soaring ballad, She. The song would go through a number of radical compositional revamps during it’s development. While a 1994 demo version of the track was released on the greatest hits compilation Savage Garden: The Singles in 2015, another vastly different demo of the song exists. The 1994 mix is more akin to a ballad, sparse and featuring only Hayes’ sublime vocals, distant strings and a piano, however, this alternate mix features percussion, a prominent synth bass line and an increased tempo. This change in melody is coupled with the addition of background vocals. While the lyrics are almost identical, the tone of each version is vastly different due to this significant contrast in composition.

Jones recollected on when the track was first written, “From memory I think we just sat down and literally wrote it together in my parents’ house in Brisbane. I remember my mother really liked the track, the innocence and raw beauty of it. It’s very pro-female song so I think a lot of girls will relate to how powerful it is for them. I think that was probably the biggest reason why my Mum really took to this particular song”. Hayes recollected on the lyrical inspiration for the track in a retrospective interview, “It’s a long time ago, but my recollection is I was writing about the relationship that I have, and continue to have, with the women in my life. From my Sister to my Mother and all the friends and the wonderful female relationships in my life. I know I’m indebted to these incredibly strong women who loved me and taught me what it was like to be strong and succeed in a world where you sometimes feel underestimated.”

The pair had recorded a wealth of tracks during this almost year long recording session and enough songs to fill more than one standard album. While some would appear as B-Sides on already released singles like I Want You and To The Moon And Back, the task at hand was to create a cohesive album. Santa Monica, which had appeared as a B-Side on the To The Moon And Back single, would be considered to appear on the forth-coming album. Hayes elaborates, “Santa Monica was intended to be a B-side, and we actually pushed a recorded track off this record to put this one on.” The enthusiasm of the record label would be a deciding factor in including the track on the pair’s debut album, despite the fact that it had already been released on the single. Darren continues, “This track appeared as a bonus track on the “To The Moon & Back” single. When we released “Moon” we felt that the song had more potential than we had at first thought. Then when we went to America, the record company fell in love with the track.”

As the track-list was decided, the final configuration of the album would include an eclectic and healthy blend of various different styles and genres. From the RNB reminiscent ballad Universe to the hard-rock explosion of Break Me Shake Me, the pair’s various different musical influences would be reflected in their debut effort. Fisher discussed his intention with the sound of Savage Garden’s eponymous debut album, “I wanted to just combine influences from the 70’s, the 80’s, the 90’s. I just wanted the entire sound to have so many different influences that it became undefinable (sic).”

Fisher would also add some final touches to the completed mixes, adding various little elements to sweeten the compositions. Darren recollects, “Charles baby-sits the record when you leave. He spent two weeks tweaking it. We came back into the mix and there were little glockenspiels and there were string sections in there and just tiny little pad bits that he had added at the end. Um…which just… they were like the seasoning, you know, on the meal. It just really…touched it off really nicely.” Hayes discussed how instrumental Fisher was in also guiding the pair in producing and taking ownership of their work, “I think we went into this record waiting for people to just turn it into a great record. We had the songs. Tell me where to sing, tell Daniel what to play, we’ll do it. It was slow process, and what it did, it taught us to take responsibility. More than anything, I think Charles taught us to make it our record, without taking anything away from Charles. He made us sit down and make decisions and be responsible for what was on tape. Um…taught me a lot about the physical nature of recording, about using equipment, um introduced us to the sampler, suggests little… little sections in songs, which you don’t think are that important, but in the end, actually really top off the song.”

The track listing would differ between the original Australian edition of the album and the various international versions. Promises would be another track that would originate from the demos recorded in 1995. The song would go through an evolution in sound and structure with Fisher suggesting to transform the outro into what would become the bridge. Hayes did not particularly favour the song and was hesitant in including the song on the international version of Savage Garden. However, due to pressure from the US label, the song would ultimately be included and All Around Me and Mine would be removed from the American release.

Other songs would be reshuffled with the chart-topping hits I Want You and Truly Madly Deeply being moved to Side A on the international configuration. Hayes discussed his preference for the flow of the original order and how it exemplified the build up of strings that would feature on the album, ”I love the track listing of the Australian album. It’s actually different to the rest of the world. To me, it starts off with To The Moon And Back and we hear the strings and Carry On Dancing comes in at full force, and Pearls carries it along. It’s again, we hear the strings section.” Not only would the track listing differ but some songs would feature a different mix. Most notably, Truly Madly Deeply would undergo a change in sound with the acoustic drums being replaced with a more commercial dance-influenced beat. The distinct keys on the original track would be lowered and instead an organ would take prominence. The guitar riff would also be more evident during the chorus on this new mix. While the original ballad was certainly accessible and had all the elements to be a significant hit, this international version seems to be mixed for a greater commercial appeal.

Savage Garden’s debut self-titled album would be released on the 4th of March 1997 in Australia and international territories the following year. To call the album a commercial success would be a vast understatement. Boosted by the success of singles, I Want You and To The Moon And Back, the album would stay at the peak of the Australian charts for 19 weeks. The success would not only be domestic, as the album would attain significant sales internationally. Truly Madly Deeply would top the single charts in the US and the pair would be launched into superstardom by the summer of 1998. Savage Garden would also attain unprecedented critical success in Australia, grasping 10 Aria Awards in 1997, a record that stands unbeaten today.

While Savage Garden will always be regarded for their iconic hits that defined Australian and international pop music in the late 1990’s, their greatest work lies beyond the numerous chart toppers. The collaborative relationship between the pair, anchored by Hayes’ sublime lyricism and Jones’ talented musicality would be instrumental in creating the exciting material that would appear throughout their discography, reflected on both their debut album and their second and final album, Affirmation.

I’m sure most artists say this, but my favourite songs are not the hits. I’m grateful for them, but I love songs like “Break Me Shake Me,” “Crash and Burn,” “Two Beds and a Coffee Machine” or “All Around Me.” [Those] are by far more my cup of tea. You can never tell which songs will be hits, but we made 95 percent uptempo electronic pop music, yet we’re most famous for those two ballads. — Darren Hayes

I think that I could survive on song-writing and live performance only in all what happens within this business and that’s from videos, the photo-shoots, the press, whatever, I mean, if I could just have that hour up on stage and then a few hours during the day to write a song to get up on that stage, I’d be happy. That’s all I need. — Daniel Jones

#Savage Garden #darren hayes #daniel jones

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architectnews · 3 years

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Kyneton House, Macedon Ranges Region

Kyneton House, Macedon Ranges Region Home, Victoria Luxury Real Estate, Australian Modern Architecture, Images

Kyneton House in the Macedon Ranges region

22 Jun 2021

Kyneton House

Architecture: MRTN Architects

Location: Macedon Ranges region, Victoria, Australia

Kyneton House is an addition to a seventies brick home located on an elevated acre site with established gardens and mature exotic trees. Simply described the addition is a main bedroom suite with associated deck for entertaining with a cover carport and workshop under. The ambition for the design however was more complex than merely the usable spaces created.

The owners were looking to adapt the existing home so that they could age in place, a strategy that would provide peace of mind as they continue their stewardship of the house and significant gardens for years to come. They are deeply appreciative of the spatial and material characteristics of the original seventies house and sought to compliment rather than imitate the existing home.

As keen art collectors and artists in their own right they were also interested in approaching the design as an opportunity for a sculptural relationship of the addition and to reference the to both the existing house and also to the steeply sloping site and the surrounding mature trees. Internally they desired natural materials and a rich material immersion that evoked a gallery experience to provide a dramatic backdrop to their art collection.

Our response was to propose an elongated black rectangular form that cantilevers beyond the landscape and reaching out the surrounding tree canopies. The simple black bar evoking the metal sculptures of Tony Smith and Anthony Caro, the black cladding providing a recessive backdrop to the surrounding greenery. The cantilevered from creates a undercover carport that leads to a new entry into the home and an elevator that carries you up to the main living level of the existing house and also the new bedroom suite, eliminating the need to stairs.

Internally the new spaces have a rich material presence creating a connection from external to internal materiality while also satisfying the clients brief for a minimum of painted surfaces. The separation of the new spaces and connection to the existing home is intentionally blurred with screened deck leading to bedroom leading to dressing room and gallery without clear delineation.

Kyneton House explores two design objectives that are seemingly opposite ends of the spectrum, an aging in place strategy for the owners and a request for sculptural response to landscape and garden. The design responds to the context of the original home and significant gardens while ensuring that the owners can continue to enjoy them for many years to come.

Who lives there? Adrian and Carl are the owners of the home, they are professionals who work in the realm of film and design respectively. This is their permanent home and also their passion.

What did this house look like and what condition was it in prior to this project? The house and grounds are very much loved by the clients, they have spent a lot of effort in making the most of the original 1977 home and as they are both very keen gardeners have really taken on the substantial gardens as an on-going project that they continue to work on and improve. Their affection for their home really was the genesis of the project as they wanted to create an addition that also ensured their long term enjoyment of the house well into the future. In simple terms the addition is a main bedroom suite with attached deck and a covered carport. However in reality it is much more than that. By enclosing a small residential elevator adjacent to the carport we created a solution to maintaining access into the original home without reliance on stairs.

Do you have any information about the original property’s history?

Information about the original house provided to the current owners by the previous owners:

“Brocklebank was designed by then Kyneton based architect Ken Robinson in 1977.

Ken later moved to Queensland, and the practice is now headed by Ken’s son Jolyon: Robinson Architects – Eumundie.

Building was in the manner of an American Barn Raising with family and friends, particularly the Kyneton Apex Club, all involved.

Bricks came from the demolition of an old dwelling on the Kyneton Showgrounds corner [now units] and shedding at what was then Turner Bros timber yard in Market Street, and also from the floors of chook sheds in Carisbrook. All were cleaned under the two gum trees the remains of which I think still carry your clothes line. Jan was sure Ben would be born with a dent in his head from her carrying and cleaning bricks.

Roofing slate was sourced from Melbourne, but the slates used in the floors were a chance find at a Begg Street clearing sale for $40.00.

Lining boards in the ceilings were from a house demolished in High Street in Lancefield, soaked in a metho bath to soften the shellac so it could be jexed to an even colour.

We moved in early/mid 1979. Initially both interior and exterior were exposed bricks, with bagging of the interior and rendering of the exterior much later.

The original garage was designed for us by Dan Flynn of Flynn Silver, who had worked with Ken Robinson while studying architecture. Again exposed brick but with a steel deck roof.

The garage was converted into a furniture studio around 1990 and was used for that purpose until 2000.The conversion was designed by Marcus O’Reilly who also did the small shed down the driveway at that time.

Marcus also designed the extension to the south of the original building, then used as bedroom/dressing and bathroom. Marcus still has a practice in Elwood, and designed our current house in Wedge Street which incorporates many of the design elements of his Brocklebank extension.

Some timber used was also sourced locally. The original bedroom/bathroom doors upstairs were from Elm milled from trees that fell at the Kyneton Mineral Springs, but it proved to be unstable and the only bit remaining may be the cookbook shelves beside the former kitchen window. The replacement doors upstairs are from Cedar of Lebanon from the Kyneton Gardens, as are the laminated covers to the steel main beams. The stairs and kitchen/living room steps are blackwood from a storm fall Blackwood from Straw’s Lame in Newham.

Were there any major inspirations or references that influenced the design? There were two main aims with the design of this project: the first was to create an addition that complimented the original 1977 home that didn’t detract from it and without being mimetic. The second was to create an extension that fit within the established landscaped garden and the very mature and beautiful tree specimens that date back to the early 1900’s. In the design we referenced abstract expressionist sculptors to propose an elevated black box that contained the additional bedroom suite but also created a carport under the cantilevered section.

What was the most challenging aspect of this project and how did you overcome this? The resulting design seamlessly ties together the original home with the addition however this required a careful and nuanced response to the what was there and a reimagining of the pathways through the home. What was an elevated front door and porch becomes an art lined corridor that links old and new.

What are your favourite parts of the finished project? The finished home has a very satisfying relationship with the garden, the garden and built form read together beautifully and the black addition becomes a wonderful backdrop to the various foliage types. However I think my favorite part of the project is the rich materiality of the interior. The extensive use of timber panels creates a calming and dramatic interior as a backdrop for the lives of the owners.

Kyneton House in the Macedon Ranges Region, Victoria – Building Information

Architect: MRTN Architects

Completion date: 2020 Building levels: 2

Photography: Dave Kulesza

Kyneton House, Macedon Ranges Region images / information received 220621

Location: Kyneton, Macedon Ranges Region, Victoria, Australia

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vantovan-blog1 · 6 years

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A beginning

Well, here we go, better late than never? This is a blog to get some of the experiences Tash and I have had and will have this year as we travel Australia and the world to find family, friends and fun, ending up in Vancouver where we plan to stay for a while before we head back to Melbourne, our home city, when it feels right.

Our instagram account (@van.to.van for those playing along at home) has captured a lot of the best moments, but it's time to get some words down too. It's been just over three months since we set off from Melbourne.

Leaving was harder than we anticipated. We found it tough to say farewell to our house, having only been in it for a year, to friendships that were really solidifying, and to family and familiar faces and places. It was an emotionally, mentally and physically tiring couple of months leading up to departure - there is a lot to organise when you upturn a settled existence - but we got there in the end and drove away from Melbourne excited, nervous and a little uncertain about what was ahead of us.

Australian road trip

Life in the van was amazing. It's a cliche, but it's remarkable how simple life becomes (temporarily at least) once you've pared down your possessions to the essentials. Fewer things in front of your face means less to think and worry about, and we quickly fell in love with the lifestyle, where the principal concerns are what you will eat for the day and where you will park the van for the night.

Our road trip took us almost all the way up the east coast to Port Douglas, a small tourist town north of Cairns, then cross country to meet the Stuart highway, down through Alice Springs to Adelaide, then back home via a few wineries in the Mclaren Vale, Barossa and Clare Valley regions.

It's difficult to pinpoint highlights as there really were so many; this trip gave us both a newfound appreciation for the beauty and variety of Australia, and as is often the case when you travel, the journey itself was as good and sometimes better than a lot of the destinations. I will, however, pick out a few.

We rushed through it more than we should have, and really want to go back again, but the section of coast between Sydney and Brisbane was spectacular. Some of the best beaches we have come across anywhere in the world are in that region. We stayed with friends in both Sydney and Brisbane who generously hosted us and put up with our larger than normal car.

There were some pretty amazing beaches above Brisbane as well, a highlight for us being the Agnes Water/1770 region, where we stayed in a bush camp right above a surf beach. Magic. Another highlight was Magnetic Island, just off the Townsville coast, where we spent a few days with some family friends Ric and Candy in their oasis of a home. A beautiful house at the end of a cul de sac right below a cliff, complete with decor from PNG and a dip pool, all accented with colourful lead light lamps and wall art made by Candy. They were very lovely hosts as well, which made it a very special few days.

Above Townsville we ran into bad weather and didn’t get to see the best that the Cairns and Whitsundays regions had to offer, but still got a good day on Whitehaven beach (Whitsunday Islands) and out on the Great Barrier Reef. It was nice to see it while it is still there; who knows how much longer it will be alive. I tried diving for the first time and had a ball.

We got rained out in Port Douglas and spent a solid two days in the van in a caravan park as landslips had closed the roads in and out of the place. That was testing, and we got very bored at times. Thanks to our good friend Pat Fountain who we stayed with in Brisbane, we had a fan to keep the insane humidity at bay. At times, it was intolerably hot and muggy. Combined with the inability to move from the car, we went a bit crazy in Port Douglas.

Once the rain cleared we schlepped across Queensland and half of the Northern Territory to the Stuart Highway, taking the long route as flooding had closed the main highway. Long stretches of road were at times very fun and at times intensely boring. We listened to a lot of true crime podcasts and audiobooks. There was also a fair share of silly dancing to loud music, something I hope we will never stop doing. The heat up north is something else in March and we were very grateful for the quality air conditioning in our van, Sheila.

We stayed with a friend in Alice Springs who took us on a tour of the West Macdonnell ranges just outside town, exploring water holes and canyons. We also spent a good chunk of our time in Alice Springs watching Ru Paul’s Drag Race; an American reality show about drag queens I hadn’t watched previously but now love. A lasting memory of Alice Springs this time will be the flies, they were awful. Not awful enough to ruin the experience, but enough to leave an impression!

After Alice, we took a few days to get down to Adelaide (via Uluru), covering big distances across the NT and SA deserts, which are vast. They are beautiful in their own way and we came to love the landscape. In Adelaide we stayed with friends of a friend and had a couple of lovely days and nights out in a city we fell in love with. It has to be the most underrated city in the country and we want to go back for the fringe festival sometime. We used the opportunity to taste some excellent wines in the regions around Adelaide and had a couple of nights on the coast south of the city. A fantastic section of Australia.

We stopped for a night in Ararat with a friend to break up the drive home, having a quick look at the new build he is project managing and were back in Melbourne just before the end of April.

Another massive highlight of these two months was the three weddings we attended, two of which we flew back from Townsville then Alice Springs for. They were all wonderful and we felt very lucky to have such great friends around us and to be invited to such beautiful events. The first was for Simon and Bec (Simon is Tash’s old boss at Isobar). Theirs was at Emu Bottom Estate just outside Sunbury in Melbourne. The next was Tom and Hannah, good friends and neighbours of ours, who got married at Wye River where Hannah’s mum owns a house. The last was Andrew and David (I work with Andrew) who got married at Mt Ophir Estate near Rutherglen in the Indigo Valley, Victoria.

South East Asia

This leg kicked off with a bit of minimoon crashing, as we joined forces with Tom and Hannah of above wedding fame for a beach/poolside holiday in Bali, split between Canggu and Uluwatu. This mostly consisted of chilling at the private villa we had in Canggu (outrageous I know), eating great food, drinking too much and reading lots. It was particularly nice to explore Uluwatu a bit, where Tash lived for a few months in 2014. Spending time in the beach clubs (the Lawn Club and Ulu Cliffhouse) also deserves a mention; it’s amazing what you get for your money in Bali. Only lowlight of this trip was Hannah coming off a scooter and badly hurting her leg, though this turned into a highlight when they got to the airport as she got ushered through check in and security in a wheelchair. Win.

Next stop was Vietnam for a couple of weeks. We flew into Ho Chi Minh City to hang out with old friends and colleagues of mine from when I lived there back in 2006 and to explore old haunts. It was great to see the school I taught at again and spend lots of time with my good friend Mr Huy. We had dinner at his family’s house one night which was fantastic. Tash was unwell for much of our time in Ho Chi Minh which was disappointing, but otherwise it was a good time. It was also fun to get back into speaking Vietnamese, which I can speak conversationally, and which came in handy when getting around outside the tourist districts.

We then spent a few days in Hoi An, where we surprised one of our neighbours from Flemington, Mara, for her 40th birthday. This was great fun, particularly the day we all dressed in matching fruit salad print threads and went out for lunch. Mara and her husband Petro have three adorable boys aged 7, 9 and 11 who were great to have around, and the whole thing was made possible by the two socialites of our street, Mark and Adrian, who are a bunch of fun to be with. Being with our neighbours made us miss home a bit and solidified both Tash and my love of our neighbourhood.

Next was Hanoi for a night then up into the mountain town of Ha Giang on a sleeper bus to do a five day motorbike tour of the hills near the Chinese border, something I did with a uni friend back in 2011. The scenery in the mountains is spectacular, and seeing it from a motorbike is definitely the best way to do it. We ate fantastic local food, feasting every night in homestays. The only downside of this part of the trip was doing it with a guide, which seemed unnecessary. When I did it seven years ago, we didn’t see any tourists on bikes and didn’t even consider the possibility of doing it solo, but this time there were a lot, most doing it without assistance, which made us feel a bit silly for spending money on the guide when we could have done it ourselves. It was nice not to have to deal with the bike breaking down though, which it did, three times.

We had one more night in Hanoi after the tour then spent five days in Bangkok with my uncle, who owns an apartment near Sukhumvit where he spends a few months of the year escaping winter and learning Thai. It was lovely to spend some time wiith him, poking around the local streets and riding the Klong (river canal) boats. A highlight was a night out at Blue Elephant restaurant, a Michelin guide restaurant, for a fancy many course meal with matched Thai wines.

Serbia volume I and Bosnia

We arrived in Serbia on 2 June where we will be spending about a month, collectively, in Novi Sad, the city where Tash’s dad’s family live. We are staying with her aunt and uncle in their house with a huge vegetable garden that spits out flavourful tomatoes, cucumbers, peppers, lettuce and all kinds of fruits and berries. These are fantastic complements to what is otherwise a very carb and meat heavy (and endlessly delicious) diet. Tash’s aunt is the best cook in Serbia in my humble opinion.

We have spent a lot of time hanging out with family, drinking coffees, rakija (brandy) and beers in the back yard, and doing a bit of gardening when the time is right. We have done a few trips into the city to explore and shop, and been for long training walks (for the West Highland Way walk we are doing in Scotland in August) and bike rides. We have also had a couple of days at the Strand, a beach on the Danube river where there are lounges, bars and loud music playing all day. Fantastic people watching and a great way to spend a sunny day.

We recently had five days with Tash’s mum’s side of the family in Banja Luka, the second largest city in Bosnia and Herzegovina, in one of the Serbian controlled regions. I have been brushing up on my history a little, learning about how complex the politics and consequent wars were in its region of the world in the 1990s. There is just nothing good that seems to come from war. It is striking how recent it was and to notice some of the cultural, physical and emotional scars that still remain.

This week, there is an international wine festival on in Novi Sad, which we will imbibe in, then we have a family friend’s apartment booked in the city centre for the weekend. Next week we are taking Tash’s aunt white water rafting, then the week after that we are off to Greece for a couple of weeks. Tough life...

#australia #roadtrip #vanlife #bali #vietnam #ho chi mihn #hoi an #hanoi #ha giang #bangkok #thailand #serbia #novi sad #bosnia #travel

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sedonabesthikes · 4 years

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US Road-trip at A-mini: The One and Only Approach to Visit

I reserved the vacation via a reputable travel broker (I actually really don't typically utilize a third-party, but guessed with this kind of crucial getaway it had been absurd to feign it for some perfect organizational expertise. I used to be the man or woman who'd reserved my supervisor on a trip later, also he just discovered in the airport terminal )

We must the vehicle leasing table - some man with dressed and white socks truly conducted into the desk to make it happen until . I let him move, though it had been tempting to race him only because of the hell of it. They would come to an end from royal household saloons therefore we are awarded A mini Cooper being a completely free improve as that is everything that is lefthanded. We're gob smacked. Travelling the united states at A-mini - exactly what would possibly be much better? Just as a pal said, "Mustang tender shirt? No? Mini? Certainly. Fantastic"

I must have around specific troubles that night directly from the airplane. Even the map-reading by avenue name/number flummoxed me personally and also we needed to avoid in a petrol channel. That is our very first adventure of the US taxpayer moving out of the way to simply help . The attendant invested a couple of moments telling us how exactly to access into your hotel if we had questioned was ways exactly to access at a certain freeway. We're totally bowled on the helpfulness plus it absolutely was to function as a sign of the way the vacation was about to grow.

Our Scottsdale hotel lodge was lavish and comfortable and needed a course to check on should you enjoy this type of item. We appreciated our live spent a little time from the pool in addition to seeing Scottsdale's center and its particular intriguing nonetheless stunning ancient memorial however were also joyful to go ahead.

Subsequently quit was Sedona history.I will always remember that generate , departure by Bell and Cathedral Rocks, using a lifetime of reddish landscape extending front of the us. My associate does not bear in mind this as nicely, as he had been driving (I really don't generate. I've experimented with. Lots of occasions. However, I really actually don't drive)

Sedona was not exactly what I anticipated. I'd read testimonies of vortices along with hippies and has been looking to observe a variety of European crusty type s together with canines, but it looked to be most hot using incredibly respectable, middle-aged people in America. We're happy to watch that though, and did a nighttime increase across Bell Rock and milk shakes from debt Planet Diner even though enjoying the alien-inspired décor and we can watch it in nighttime at its own red-lit splendor.

Flagstaff arrived , and also we were also scheduled to move to each day hike down the Grand Canyon with all Angels Gate excursions. One among these "light to moderate" kinds. I am happy we chose you. I've nightmares even believing by that which certainly one of those "complicated" kinds involves. (We do stroll a significant piece however, it can are about horizontal earth...)

Yours had mucked upward back again. I had granted the excursion company that the hotel pickup title that had then been shifted, however that I had not presumed to let them know. After imagining calling and ringing all had been piled and Karen our excursion guide came just half an hour or so later she had been assumed to pick up us. Could have been even worse.

Subsequent to the fear exerted from the sight of this rucksacks along with also five bottles of snacks and water we managed to able to take we improved down the stupendous Grand Canyon and back again. The single hurdle to your thoroughly fulfilling and gratifying afternoon had been an Australian bribe known as William who was unable to complete a sentence with no words "me" or even "that I" init. He had been definitely going house by having an unbelievable multitude of images of Arizona that included him every one. For your great joy we managed to scale out from this Canyon minus aid from a helicopter, either a mule, or even robust person.

Our second port of call had been dying Valley. I used to be quite curious to observe what kind of fever we'd become right here, also was not frustrated. We're at excess of a hundred amounts and of us'd sensed a sexy breeze like those who satisfied us . This really was overdue September therefore that I am only able to imagine heat that builds in that Sub sea desert at the summertime months. Besides some small shock in the check our lodge (perhaps not until after 4pm, if his granny was to check on in and also the inadequate woman supporting the counter appeared as when she had been about to own a breakdown managing the huge queue) we now got our completely free ice out of the overall retail store and must grips our less compared to silent air-conditioning. Dying Valley was more hillier than I had predicted, and also we were completely impressed with all the bizarre undulations of both Zabriskie position and extensively experienced romping throughout the Mesquite sand dunes. Interesting at a dark sandpit for several of the familymembers.

We're there for only 1 evening, and right after having a celebrity gazing session at which I was able to knock my sole jar of beer at the pitch-black whilst becoming enthused concerning the Milky Way and 2 shooting stars (outstanding - at Britain the single location you may observe the Milky Way is at the North Scotland also it's really also cold around on to sit outside in my own estimation ) we led to nevada.

I'd done a whole lot of research on las-vegas because I was not absolutely convinced I'd be glad there. Each instinct in my entire body tells me to not bet and also the notion of a adult Disneyland switched into my gut, in all honesty. However, after examining"Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas" along with a number other adequate literature that my mind was at the appropriate location. We remained in the MGM, that had been amazing at we walked beyond an image of Cary Grant in our method into the lifts daily and day. This consists up to its deficiency of coffee-making centers while in the space, that we figure represented the newest frame of mind in Vegas. Why supply any such thing free once you are able to convince folks to cover this? Town was over the very top and foolish not surprisingly but we're surprised at Down Town lavages all around Fremont road. An excursion across the Neon Boneyard along with also a trip for the Peppermint Lounge (showcased from the movie "Casino") gave us a wonderful awareness of this foundation of this area. Some thing which's tough to find at a city which is always being reconstructed.

The most useful is to emerge back. We were not well prepared for precisely how magnificent this spot is. I have read everywhere September is if Yosemite are in its tired, following the summer crowds have remaining, and now that I am only able to think about how a lot a lot more superb it has to maintain spring and winter when that is it appearing drowsy. The perspectives of both Half Dome and its own corresponding clouds ended up to me the greatest. "Purple mountains majesty" popped in my thoughts although they truly are purple. Oahu is the "majesty" which clinches it, so '' I figure.

We're going home fleetingly, together with just san-francisco to really go. It had been foggy and a little cold , like I feel it regularly can be, and also we did not do it justice with merely a two night stay. But following the astounding perspectives we had found within our excursion, I must express that it brought us straight back again to ground somewhat and educated us unfortunately we had return into the awful old metropolis of London to work soon following.

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dlpindiacom-blog · 6 years

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What Makes Australia the Most Preferred Study Destination | DLP India

Katherine, a student from Belgium, needed a change in her life, so she decided to study in Australia. She was good at French but was unable to speak English, so she opted for the English language study in a Sydney school for 18 months. Given the need to pay for transportation, food and a place to live, she accepted a job as a cleaning assistant. Now, she is planning to take Business Studies course at CQ University.

“What I like the most about Australia is safety, another advantage is public transport and it fascinates me that society has a relationship with nature…. I did some research and Australia was my first choice for studying,” Katherine.

Read Also: Can Sabbatical Help You Find a Direction in Your Career?

For many people like Katherine, Australia is one of the first options that come to mind when they think about studying abroad; that is why it is not strange that in this country around 20% of the students of higher education are foreigners, a figure that made Australia the country with the highest concentration of international students in the world.

Australia is listed as one of the best countries to live in the world. This nation has the safest cities in the world, in addition to providing a high quality of life and great study offers. However, when you want to emigrate and study there, the same question always arises: “Will it be a good investment for my future?”

Here are some facts that can help you choose Australia as your study destination:

Scholarships

Looking to keep things the same way, the government and some universities in the country grant more than 200 million dollars (Australian) in scholarships for international students with high academic performance. So, if you get to work, you can claim some of that sum for you.

Top Ranking Universities and a Good Educational Environment

According to the QSRanking, there are around seven Australian universities in the top 100 and many more are there in the top 300. It means the environment for education is quite competitive. Educational institutes try to come with up with the best practices, courses and programs in order to remain ahead of the competition.

Employment

Money is the single most factor that affects and concerns international students all over the globe. The unemployment rate in Australia is well below 10%, which means it is easy to get a job if you seek one. Current minimum wage stands at $18.29 an hour and one can make a decent living (as a student) working part-time.

Beaches and Nature

If you love nature, you will absolutely love Australia. There are great beaches, scenic natural landscapes and unique wildlife. There are thousands of places that you can visit and have a great time.

Public Transport

Australia has a well-established public transportation network. So, you live in suburbs and still reach your workplace or college in the city center with comfort and ease. According to the 2015 Fare Benchmarking Report by Brisbane-based consultancy Nine Squared, capital cities of Australia are ahead of London, New York, Berlin and Paris in most affordable places for public transport.

Hence, Australia is a great study destination where you can meet a lot of different people and where you would want to travel to different places.

The American author Mark Twain put it best when he said: “Traveling is fatal to prejudice, fanaticism and narrow-mindedness.” In a world that is more connected than ever, open appreciation and understanding of other cultures are essential.

Read Also: How does Six Sigma help in Process Improvement?

The friends you meet in the Australian universities will be part of your network for life. Along with the creation of rewarding personal friendships, the connections you make are the most valuable asset you can have in your professional life. Wherever your career takes you, having international connections can open the door to unexpected opportunities. As the saying goes, “it’s not what you know, it’s who you know”.

#Distance Learning #Distance Learning MBA #Distance Learning BBA #Distance Learning Courses #Distance Learning BCA #Banking courses #Online courses #six sigma #Skill development #PMP #PGDM

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hustlebonezzzz · 4 years

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Short Story: Integument

“Is it safe to be getting your face that close?” I said with hesitance.

Locke was down on all fours, marveling at a large Eastern brown snake sunbathing in the center of the almost desolate road.

“Don’t worry, mate,” Locke said in his thick Australian accent, looking calm and confident while his eyes and the snake’s were locked onto one another. “Out where they belong, snakes are gentle as can be.”

I squatted down and snapped a photo of the surreal Kodak moment unfolding before my eyes.

“Everyone gets the wrong idea about snakes,” said Locke. “Most run into snakes when they’re scared and cranky, but that’s not the true nature of a snake,” His charismatic words paired the Australian accent somehow lessened the tense mood of the situation.

In all my experience as a wildlife photographer, Locke had been the most hands on I’d seen. Although his face couldn’t have been more than three feet from the snake, I trusted his judgement. I had never seen anything like this. I put my focus back into shooting the scene instead of worrying about Locke getting bit by our first accidental run-in with a snake. Looking through the viewfinder of the camera and zooming in, I couldn’t help but admire the look of the brown, wet looking scales that laid atop its thick, muscular body. This snake blended in perfectly with the dusty brown landscape that surrounded. From behind the safety of my zoom lense, I focused on the snakes small head, finger half pressed on the shutter, waiting for the right moment to snap a photo. Snakes have a way of constantly looking pissed off even if they’re not. The brow of this one was permanently furrowed. The snake flicked its tongue and without a hesitation, I fully pressed the shutter. *Click*

“Got it,” I said to myself. A small moment, a fraction of a second, captured forever.

“Jude, are you ready to bag ‘em up?” Locke said, still refusing to avert his gaze from the deadly reptile.

“Ready when you are,” Jude said assuringly. Locke slowly backed away and stood up. Getting three feet away from the face of a deadly snake seemed like a showboating move on the surface, but I could tell that Locke was genuinely marveling at the creature like it had been his first time ever seeing one.

Jude handed him the three foot long metal snake hook, and they both assumed their positions on each side of the snake. Jude manned the cloth snake bag, which was clipped to a metal hoop to prop it open. He held on to the end of the metal arm that extended from the hoop like a cane. Then, with impressive ease, Locke used the snake hook to guide the Eastern brown into the cloth bag. To my surprise, the snake seemed at will to Locke and slithered into the bag without putting up a fight. Locke seemed to be the natural snake charmer. Jude began to twirl the metal arm to twist the bag shut.

“Nice work, boys,” said Locke. “Now let’s get this girl off the road and on her way”

Back in the jeep, I could still feel the effects of the adrenaline from our encounter with our first snake of the journey, the most poisonous in Australia as Locke would later point out. I sat in the back, laying my head back against the leather headrest, watching the the scenery of the Australian bush pass by as I reflected on how I got to this exciting point in my career. This was my second time being hired by NatGeo as a freelancer to shoot photos to go along with a magazine article. This article was a feature on the top ten deadliest snakes in Australia. My very first assignment had been to take photos of snails, a low-stakes assignment compared to now. I remember my early days of photographing weddings and taking senior portraits to barely scrape by. My young ego had a hold on me then, and nothing was more agonizing to me then than shooting senior portraits. My family had sorely questioned my choice of pursuing a career in photography, and the debt I had after pursuing a degree in photography made me question how worthwhile it was. But I can say that I ruthlessly hung in there no matter what, hammering my way through my twenties to build my nature and wildlife portfolio in hopes of getting some sort of recognition. I’m so glad I stuck to my guns, and I’d be lying if i said I wasn’t at least a little bit proud of myself. My parents are just happy that I didn’t get a degree to photograph families at Sears.

“Most people ‘round here run over the poor things if they ever see ‘em laying in the road like that,” said Locke, bringing my attention back from my daydream. “She’s lucky that we ran into her today!”

“That she is, that she is,” said Jude. “You still make me nervous every time you get yourself that close to a snake.”

“Hahaha, if I’ve learned anything, snakes are the least of my worries, it’s other people that pose the real threats in life. Snakes are easy, their intentions are laid out for all to see. People are harder, they pretend to be your friend first before they strike.”

“Sounds like you’ve been burned in the past, eh?” Jude said with a chuckle.

“Well, haven’t we all?”

Jude began twisting the volume dial on the radio, a news broadcast now filled the jeep.

“It’s been approximately 72 hours since 42 year-old Zara Rumburg of Darwin went missing. There are no possible suspects and there is no current evidence of a struggle in the home of Rumburg, where she was last known to be. Her car was parked in her driveway at the time of her disappearance. We cannot conclude that this is a kidnapping, but we encourage all Darwin residences to take precaution and report any information that could lead to the recovery of Zara Rumburg.”

Jude clapped both of his hands together. “Nice to know that there’s a looney roaming the streets of my hometown.”

“It’s probably someone she knows, that’s usually how it goes, right.” I said.

“See what did I tell ya, they get close to you and then they strike. Our next stop is actually just right outside of Darwin,” said Locke.

“A man named Tom called about a possible desert death adder” said Jude. “Highly venomous, Chris, so keep your wits about you or you’ll be good as dead.” he said half jokingly.

“Oh don’t scare ‘em like that Jude, we have nothing to worry about as long as we’re precautious.” said Locke.

“You guys are the ones with the dangerous part of the job,” I said with a laugh. “I get the easiest part of it all.” I grabbed my large DSLR camera and checked the battery life and made sure the settings were correct for the third time to make sure to prevent any possible camera mishaps. This assignment, if shot well, could do a lot for me as far as building a reputation.

I was the only one in the trio that didn’t have an extensive background with reptiles. When I first received the offer to shoot this assignment, I thought they might have us traveling deep into the bush, but I soon found out that most of these snakes can be found in many Australian suburbs, where city meets country. In a way, our mission was to kill two birds in one stone. Locke and Jude would perform their service and remove snakes that had found their way too close to people and release them back into the wild, and I would photograph it all. My part of the job was straight forward. The magazine wanted photos that illustrated how many of Australia’s most dangerous snakes can wind up close to humans, and that’s exactly what they were going to get.

Locke, or Dr. Locke Beckett for formality's sake, was a zookeeper at the Taronga Zoo in Sydney, specializing in reptiles. Dr. Jude Cornell also shared a love for snakes, and was known in Australia for his toxicology research with snake venom. He served as Locke’s right-hand man for this trip, and had anti- venom at the ready.

After continuing to drive for about a half an hour, Locke turned the jeep onto a gravel driveway and pulled up to a trailer sized house resting on stilts, three feet above the ground. A small plastic playground set up for toddlers stood in the grassy front yard.

“I reckon the snake is cooling off under one of those tarps under the house.” said Jude. “Perfect place for it on a day like this.” Today had been especially sweltering, and we had all sweat through our shirts from our first encounter with the Eastern brown. Regardless, we were all anxious and eagerly hopped out of the Jeep to hopefully encounter the death adder.

“Crazy to think that there are children playing alongside deadly snakes.” I said as we approached the small porch attached to the house.

“Snakes are just a part of everyday life here in Australia. They’ve been wandering around here a lot longer than we have.” Locke said with enthusiasm.

Before we could reach the porch, a stocky, older man walked out onto the small porch. He reminded me of Santa with his trim snow white hair and beard, along with his firm-looking pot belly that was accentuated by his neatly tucked in t-shirt.

“G’day gentlemen! I bet you’re here about my snake problem.” said the man.

“In fact we are!” replied Locke. “I’m Locke, this is my partner Jude, and here we have our photographer, Chris.”

“Nice to meet you all, I’m Tom. I appreciate you comin’ out to help me get rid of the feller. Scared the hell out of me when I saw it a couple days ago”

“Absolutely, of course! So now the question is, where can we find it.”

“Down in the cellar in the backyard over here.” Tom motioned with his hand for us to follow him.

“I wonder how it found its way down into the cellar.” Jude wondered aloud.

I had seen cellars attached to houses before, but a cellar with doors parallel to the ground in the center of a backyard was new to me. The doors had rust around the handles and hinges, with dark green paint blistering off from being directly in the sun day after day. The more I thought about it, there was no evidence of any space large enough for a snake to find its way in, and looking at the contemplative expression on Jude’s face, I could tell he was thinking the same thing. But my knowledge of snakes was limited to say the least. I’m sure there are more ways than one for a snake to find its way into a cool, underground cellar.

The doors creaked as Tom pulled them both open, revealing a set of concrete steps leading down into the cellar. This thing was more like a bunker than anything. The cool air of the cellar hit like a wave, and offered a moments relief from the sun’s rays.

“Looks like a bit of a tight fit down there.” said Locke. “I think it might be best if I go down and have a look first and locate the snake.”

Jude and I both agreed, and remained at the opening of the cellar. It was hard to view what was going on from our angle. The bunker-like room extended to left at the base of the stairs. The cellar didn’t have superb lighting from what little I could see, and Locke used his pocket flashlight to get a better look. The one thing I did notice was that Tom seemed to become increasingly uncomfortable as time went on. His eyes kept darting back and forth between the house and the cellar. As strange as it seemed at first, I could understand why one might become uncomfortable. It wouldn’t be a great day for Tom if someone was bit by a venomous snake on his property. Jude seemed to quickly take notice to Tom’s behavior as well, and promptly began the small talk.

“I’m actually from Darwin, born and raised. We actually heard something about a missing woman from here earlier on the radio.”

“Oh yes, indeed. You know, it’s funny that you mention that.” Tom turned and motioned to the only other house about a mile down the desolate gravel road. “The missing woman actually lived just down the road there. Crazy. Sweet woman, she was. Recently widowed actually. She’s got a sad story to tell. But that’s for another time.” Tom said with a coldness.

“Oh jeez, that is crazy. I don’t know if I’d feel comfortable staying here by myself after that” I said. Tom remained silent, and I wondered if I had said the wrong thing.

Luckily, Locke returned to the surface a moment later.

“I couldn’t find anything down there. He must have found a way out. My bet is it’s under your shady house. I saw a rodent scurrying around when we were walking up earlier.” said Locke. “Shade and food on a day like this is exactly what a snake needs. If you don’t mind, I’d be more than happy to take a look.”

Tom paused for a moment, glancing back again at the house.

“Sure, sure! That’d be great. But first, why don’t we go inside for a moment and have a drink to cool off. You all look like you need it. I made my special fresh lemonade this mornin” said Tom.

None of us could argue with that logic, and we all proceeded to walk into his home. As we followed Tom into the house, my eyes were met with the head of a dingo, a dead one, hanging directly ahead of the front door.

“That’s sure a statement piece you’ve got here.” I said with a smile.

“Like it eh? Did it myself.” Tom said as he walked into the kitchen.

I soon noticed that the dingo wasn’t the only taxidermied animal in the room. The living area was chock full of different furried animals. A wombat, a fox, and to my surprise, a koala. There were several other small to medium sized mammals erected around the room. The koala was somehow perched onto a thick, long stick, standing upright out of a large terra cotta pot, making the taxidermied koala that much more uncomfortable to look at.

“Wow, you’re pretty good, they look so real.... I’ve heard taxidermy isn’t the easiest thing to do.”

“It’s a passed down art form.” said Tom. “My father taught me everything I know.” he said with pride in his voice.

I saw Jude quickly shake his head in disapproval at the sight of the koala.

“Have you ever heard of the Koala Protection Act, Tom?” Locke fired quickly at Tom, with an air of seriousness replacing his upbeat demeanor.

Tom began to chuckle, a small grin escaping his lips. “Calm down, Locke. My father passed that one down to me, and his father passed it down to him. Got the papers to prove it if you’d like to see”

A wave silence fell over the group for what seemed like an eternity, but in reality was only about three seconds.

“I don’t think that will be necessary.” Locke solemnly replied.

Tom’s half smile still remained. “Well anywho, let me get that lemonade. This way into the kitchen, gentlemen.”

We followed Tom through the small door frame. Although small, it was clean and quaint, a nice contrast to the living room full of dead animals. Photos of a young boy and girl were hanging on the fridge, along with silly crayon scribble drawings. Must be his grandkids. The kitchen opened up to a small nook, with a table and two chairs placed along the window. Locke and I took a seat at the table while Jude leaned up against the counter. Looking out onto the plastic playset outside, I thought back to the idea of children playing so close to something that could kill them with one bite. Their small bodies wouldn’t stand a chance. An adult has at least a little bit of time before the ill effects of the venom fully set in.

The clanking of glass cups roused me from my thought, and Tom began pouring lemonade from a glass pitcher.

“You know, taxidermy isn’t as easy as one might think.” Tom said, looking in my direction.

Oh god. I thought we were leaving this topic behind.

“Yeah? Why do you say that?” I immediately regretted my choice of words. Asking him to tell me more probably wasn’t the wisest choice.

“Well,” Tom said as he loaded the the tall, sweating glasses of lemonade onto a dainty metal tray. He began to walk towards the table. “There are many elements that go into successfully preserving an animal's body, Chris.” His eyes flicked up to meet mine. The quick and unexpected eye contact was enough to send goosebumps up my arms.

“Really now?” I responded, pathetically trying to terminate a conversation that I wasn’t sure how to shut down.

Tom exhaled sharply, and I could tell my attempt to end the conversation was not about to work. He set the metal tray onto the table. Upon receiving my glass, I couldn’t drink it fast enough, and I was the first to finish. I didn’t realize how thirsty I was until my lips hit the sweet liquid. Delicious. Locke and Jude downed their beverages just as quick, and its smooth, sweet tartness seemed to be enough to lighten up the mood for a moment or two.

“Taxidermy only preserves the skin, you see.” The mood quickly reverted to awkward and tense. “ You don’t have the organs, fat, muscle, and cartilage that help form the true structure and shape of the animal. The skin is removed and then mounted on a mannequin in the shape that resembles the animal. That’s the hard part of it all. It’s not the stripping of skin from an animal, it’s creating that perfectly shaped mannequin for the skin and fur to lay atop. It’s a meticulous process if I do say so.”

The small grin on Tom’s face still remained. It was really starting to piss me off, that smugness of it all. It made his taxidermy talk seem out of spite towards Locke and Jude, as if he was trying to push their buttons, and it seemed to be working. Locke and Jude looked annoyed, but I didn’t take them as the type who easily lost their cool. He was probably just some crazy old kook after all.

“I never knew that about taxidermy.” I said.

I turned my back to the window to face Jude and Tom. The heat must have taken its hold on me, because nauseousness began to wave over. Downing a highly sugared drink probably didn’t help.

“Hey Tom, I’m sorry, but would you mind if I had a glass of water?” I said.

“Not a problem. You look faint, mate. Here, hand me your glass.” said Tom, eyes looking upon me with uncomfortable intent. That smug smile still remained.

I reached to grab my glass, but knocked it onto the linoleum floor with the backside of my knuckles. I watched the glass crash to the ground- I was more out of it than I thought.

Tom casually walked over to the corner of the kitchen and grabbed a broom and dust pan. He began to calmly sweep up the glass. I guess I wouldn’t be getting any water from him today.

“You know gentleman, I have a taxidermy bucket list.”

A wave of confusion and fear rolled over me. What the hell was he talking about?

I watched as Locke began to lean up against the wall, as a faintness grew upon him as well. Suddenly, Jude crashed to the ground, his head narrowly missing the corner of the small table.

“What the fuck is going on?!” Locke yelled with his last bit of energy.

I was passing out, we were all passing out, and before I had the chance to tumble out of my chair, I crossed my arms on top of the table and rested my head atop. My limbs felt so heavy to lift. I could hear glass crunching. I lifted my head to look forward at Locke, only to see that he was fully slumped against the wall with eyes shut.

“I only.. one species... left to attempt on my… list… the most difficult...”

The words began to sound more and more warped, like an adult speaking in one of those Peanuts episodes. I kept fading out further and further, and there was nothing I could do. I couldn’t stand, speak, or understand what was going on around me. All I could do was give in to the overwhelming drowsiness.

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annoyingcherryblossomnight-blog1 · 7 years

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How To Discover Low-cost Journey By Verena Veneeva

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A local insurer will guide you greatest whether or not to go for domestic travel insurance or international travel insurance coverage, in consideration together with your distinctive wants. Tasmania is likely one of the prettiest places in Australia, and in certain means it'd remind some of you of landscapes of New Zealand. Australia is stuffed with freedom camps, which are both free or low value tenting and ideal for in travelling in a camper van. For those who determine to go on a extra adventurous holiday equivalent to snowboarding, make sure you have winter sports cover. Catamaran excursions take people out within the sea to look at Humpback whales.

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ronaldmrashid · 7 years

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Millennial Avocado Toast Analysis: Permission To Splurge

“When I was trying to buy my first home, I wasn’t buying smashed avocado for $19 and four coffees at $4 each,” Tim Gurner, an Australian property mogul told 60 Minutes.

“We’re at a point now where the expectations of younger people are very, very high,” Gruner said. “They want to eat out every day, they want to travel to Europe every year. The people that own homes today worked very, very hard for it, saved every dollar, did everything they could to get up the property investment ladder.”

Tim’s words have ignited a backlash from millennials who are offended someone would attack their eating desires. Eating expensive food is a sacred right! The nerve of this guy. Next thing you know, he’s going to dissuade people from buying $300 designer jeans when they already have a credit card balance.

As fate would have it, I just had a $10 bowl of guacamole the other day at Tacoliscious in the Marina district, after spending time doing some ceiling patch work on my rental house. All around me sat a bunch of young and fabulous looking folks who enjoyed the 78 degree San Francisco sunshine. Oh, how I wish I didn’t have a house to do work on. I could have gone straight to brunch!

Bottom line: If you’re a millennial who wants to spend $25 on the finest breakfast consisting of avocados, bacon and crumbled feta cheese, go for it! You don’t need to save for a house because you’re either living with your parents or your parents will eventually buy you one when they can’t stand you any longer. And if they don’t buy you anything, they’ll at least leave you their house when they die.

Millennial Avocado Analysis

I know some of you think I’m being a bit flippant, but living in NYC and SF over the past 18 years, I’ve seen with my own eyes how so many parents are supporting their adult children. Let me share with you some recent encounters and some statistics as to why it’s OK for the majority of you to spend aggressively while young and not save for my favorite wealth building asset class.

Neighbor One: Brendan is 27 years old and lives in the basement of his parent’s house across the street from me. He’s a nice guy who loves to go snowboarding every chance he can get. He told me he went up for a total of 45 days this winter because Tahoe had the most snow in decades. Right on brother!

Just last week he, his girlfriend and two friends got back from a three hour SF Giants game that started at 1:05pm. I was doing some final staining on my planter boxes when they pulled up. They were so happy to enjoy a great weekday victory while his parents were at work. He has a lot of free time because he bartends part-time. With living expenses close to zero, he doesn’t need to work a lot.

Neighbor Two: Jason, the then 22 year old who was living at home attending community college three years ago when I bought my current house is back to living at home after transferring to and graduating from UC Davis. When I asked his mother what he was doing when she sneakily entered my property to get a closer look at my new landscaping work, she said, “random things,” implying he was still looking for full-time work.

Meanwhile, Jason has invited two of his friends to live with him in his parent’s house. His parents no longer live in the house as they have another house up north. They just check-in every couple of weeks or so.

One of Jason’s housemates just bought a new Harley Davidson for about $10,000. He works at the grocery store down the hill. Jason himself has a racing bike and a sports car. Housemate #2, who works at Chipotle, drives a Ford Flex. Why ride the bus and get a full-time job when living costs are completely subsidized?

Neighbors Three, Four, Five, Six, Seven: All either live for free or inherited their houses. They’re all between 35 – 60 and really nice folks who don’t have full-time jobs. For more details, see: A Massive Generational Wealth Transfer Is Why Everything Will Be OK

House buying competition: “What percentage of first time homebuyers get help from their parents in the form of a downpayment or total payment?” is a question I’ve asked about 25 real estate agents so far this year. Their answers range from 30% – 70%. Every agent said that parental help is extremely common. The media likes to demonize foreign buyers for making real estate more expensive for locals. But it’s really parents helping their children who make the bigger impact.

For example, the winning bid for the house that I had put an all cash offer for in April was from parents buying the house for their son. He graduated from college this year and is starting at Airbnb. I’m guessing the final sales price is $1.82M, or $321K over asking. Next time you go to an open house, ask the listing agent my same question.

Inheritance expectations: Personal Capital surveyed over 100,000 millennials who use their free app and they found the median amount a millennial expects to inherit is over $1,000,000. Although the inheritance may not come until later in life, if you think you have at least $1,000,000 coming to you, you’re not worrying about spending $20 bucks on glorious avocado toast. Instead, you’ll probably want a $12 mimosa to go along with it!

Who can blame a millennial for quitting a job only after a couple years if it’s not the perfect fit? No longer do young adults have to “take it and like it” as we older folks did when paying our dues. If there isn’t constant recognition from management and a clear accelerated career path, then it’s sayonara suckers.

See: No Wonder Why Millennials Don’t Give A Damn About Money!

Low housing expenses: A recent FS survey with over 2,600 respondents showed that 66% of you spend less than 20% of your gross income on housing. That’s fantastic. Meanwhile, a good 4% of you spend 0% of your gross income on housing because you either have financial support or rent out a portion of your house. With 70% of you doing so well, you might as well splurge on a $180 side of beluga caviar to top off your $12 mimosa and $20 toast. Housing cost is clearly not as big of a concern as the mass media makes it out to be.

Note: There is a poll embedded within this post, please visit the site to participate in this post's poll.

See: Housing Expense Guideline For Financial Independence

Live It Up Early Or Late, It’s All The Same

After the age of 34, I started living the millennial dream life because I had left Corporate America. After a little bit of writing in the morning, I’d play tennis for a couple hours and then have a boozy brunch with other unemployed friends. While I didn’t order $20 avocado toast, I did increase my spending on $25 chirashi bowls (assorted sashimi over rice). Afterwards, I’d give in to food coma and take an hour nap on my couch. Life was wonderful!

I got to know many 20-something and early 30-something year old folks who didn’t work full-time, seemed to love life, and lived at home with their parents. From the millennials with full-time jobs who I met while consulting at some of the fintech firms, I know of several who had parental assistance with downpayments on new property. Given that was back in 2013-2014, they’re now much wealthier because property prices have appreciated 20% – 40%.

Millennials are being completely rational by living their ideal lifestyles before they turn 40 because they CAN. With the internet allowing anybody to be untethered from a cubicle, freelance work has taken off and will surpass full-time employment within a decade. With wealthy parental safety nets, millennials are taking more risks by switching careers at the fastest pace in history. They’re also starting companies, taking more time off to travel, and spending more extravagantly.

Some are just plain envious of the millennial lifestyle, especially those who busted their butts to get to a level which millennials are already enjoying. I wish my parents had bought me a condo when I first moved to NYC in 1999. I wish my parents had bought me a house when I moved to San Francisco in 2001. If they did, I’d be so rich I could have turned into one of those Instagram playboys by age 30!

Though I wasn’t gifted any property, today I do have four properties which I can gift my children so they can live lives of leisure. Maybe they’ll even learn some responsibility as property managers and share some of the rental income with mom and dad. Damn, I wish I were my children!

Final point: Some of you might be wondering what about the importance of pride and independence. By giving an adult children everything, we may rob themselves of self-actualization. While yes, it’s extremely gratifying to achieve success on one’s own. Don’t be so sure that millennials aren’t living incredibly satisfying lives.

Here’s one millennial’s response that sums things up perfectly:

“Sam, I didn’t have a choice when I was born or to whom I was born to. There are so many bad people in the world. If I don’t harm others, I feel I’m already way ahead of the game.“

How To Get Your Parents To Pay For Everything As An Adult Child

How To Get Girls If You Live At Home With Mom And Dad

Any millennials out there want to share why they are offended by some random person in Australia who says you shouldn’t spend so much on avocados? Given there’s such a massive wealth transfer underway, isn’t it completely rational to live a life of leisure if you don’t have to work as hard to build your own wealth? Are older people simply jealous of the millennial lifestyle?

from http://www.financialsamurai.com/millennial-avocado-toast-analysis/

#Financial Samurai

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realestate63141 · 8 years

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Working with Models: A Beginner’s Guide

Running a shoot from start to finish can be pretty demanding—working with creative staff, managing your camera, adjusting settings, directing, and ensuring that everything is going smoothly. It can be pretty daunting with the prospect of trying to handle all of this right?

One of the more challenging aspects when starting out can definitely be getting comfortable working with the model(s) on a shoot, and how to ensure everyone comes out happy and satisfied.

In this article I’m going to tell you:

The principles and attitudes behind successfully working with models from all walks of life;

How to talk to models, and how to get over that initial nervousness of being a director on a shoot;

How to treat models on and off set to ensure a solid and strong professional relationship can be developed.

I have also created a video which outlines everything in this article. Feel free to watch or alternatively read on.

So let’s go!

Note: this article has been written from the perspective that the majority of models I work with are female. Everything in here applies to men and women, but it has been written from the mindset of working with female models.

youtube

Preface – Getting into fashion photography from other backgrounds

Chances are if you are reading this you may be interested to get into the world of fashion and portrait photography. You might be a fashion enthusiastic, you might want to get published in a magazine, or you may simply want to get incredible shots of people. Hopefully it would be all three of these.

“But I have only shot wildlife and landscapes before!”

Join the club! I have a background of shooting exactly those things, and suddenly came into enjoying shooting portraits when a friend of mine asked me to pick up the camera and get a basic photo of them for their Facebook profile. I had no clue as to how to direct or work with models back then but I snapped a photo, and loved it. From then I decided I’d give this whole portrait photography thing a try.

That was two years ago!

One of my old photos from 2010 – as you can see it is very different from what I usually produce nowadays, but this was where I came from!

So don’t fret if you haven’t got the background, we all need to start somewhere, and in this article I’m going to give you a thorough breakdown of how you can effectively work with models.

Part 1 – Fundamental principles of working with models

Let’s lay a solid base here. Having the right attitude and personal principles in place is essential. The following principles are what I abide by, and what I feel makes the whole experience of working with a model professional, personal, and fun!

Principle 1: Models are people too!

This is perhaps the biggest point I want to highlight. You have to remember that models are people too. These are people who have hopes, fears, anxieties, and dreams just like you or anyone else. They are not soulless objects, nor items without motivation. These are people who want to have fun, do the best they can, and be able to showcase some awesome work.

They can get nervous before shoots, worry about whether the makeup looks right, and overthink if they perhaps didn’t do a pose completely right. I’m not saying all models are like this at all, but these thoughts are probably more common than you think!

Please remember that! It is also important when we move onto Principle 2.

Everyone’s uniqueness is what makes them special. Models aren’t just items and objects you can move around; you have to remember that these are real people too.

Principle 2: The model’s comfort is your top priority, and they deserve your respect at all times.

I like to make a point of this again and again, and here I go again; on a shoot, the model’s comfort should be your top priority. By that I mean if at any point a model isn’t feeling comfortable with what is happening, the shoot should stop, and if the discomfort can’t be rectified immediately, the shoot should end. Period.

I say this for a number of reasons. The first is common human decency. Come on. If you are in an environment where you can usually easily stop what is going on, and someone isn’t happy, you should just stop. No photo is worth putting someone through something that could physically or emotionally hard them.

Nay sayers may say that this is me being over the top, but I can hand on heart say that I could turn away from any photo and be sure to capture another amazing one with the same team at another time.

Portrait and fashion photography should be fun! However, you always have to make sure that the model’s comfort is your top priority and that you make sure they are well looked after throughout the whole process.

The next reason is that if you have a model who isn’t feeling the shoot, and who isn’t comfortable, that is going to reek through the photos. If you are taking a photo of someone who doesn’t want to be there or isn’t interested in the shoot, you are going to see it in their eyes, in their posture, and in the end results.

Finally, one point to hammer home is that you should always ensure that everything that happens on a shoot abides by the rules of consent. That is ensuring that if you agree to do a fashion based shoot, you won’t be encouraging a model to remove clothing, or asking them to get into positions which are not in line with what was originally agreed with in the shoot.

This comes down to basic respect, and also (to put it bluntly) not being a sleazy creep who exploits models just so you can see a bit of skin. 200% not cool, creative, or in line with great ‘photography.’

Consent is one of the most important parts of a shoot; the photographs captured should be of a nature of which was agreed upon when the call was made for models. No model should ever be put into a situation that they did not explicitly consent to.

Principle 3: Realize that photographers have it easier than models in the majority of cases.

This may be a heated discussion point but I’m going to give you my opinion here. Photographers have it way, way easier than models do, in terms of what is expected, and behaviour.

Let me explain. As a photographer, on average you have to put your trust in the model being polite, able to listen and dressed as agreed, as well as making sure they credit your work properly post shoot.

Models on the other hand have to trust that the photographer will:

Conduct themselves in a professional manner before, during and after the shoot;

Be polite and respect agreed boundaries;

Take photos that are flattering and suitable for the direction they want to head in with their modeling career;

Edit the photos to a respectable standard and not go overkill on the editing so it looks fake (unless of course that is the agreed aim);

Credit the model properly on social media;

As you can see there is a lot more expectation and trust needed from the photographer when it comes to shooting and processing a photoshoot. Fair enough, this also highlights the hard work a photographer has to put in, but consider the above as a mindset of the trust models will put into you.

Models can face a lot of unseen pressure when it comes to thinking if the pose will look right, if the photographer will conduct themselves professionally, and if they will also subsequently process the photos in a flattering manner.

Principle 4: Don’t be intimidated by the model, and the perceived fame of modeling and the fashion industry.

I say this in the most respectful way to everyone involved in fashion photography; don’t be intimidated by the fame or glitz of the fashion industry. You will work with models who are incredibly beautiful people, and whom you could find intimidating. Society always pens a lot of weight onto someone’s looks and of course you will be working with people who can sometimes be exceptionally good looking.

Why am I saying this? Because I want you to remember Principle 1: models are people too. You are also a person as well, and the fashion and portraiture industry is open to anyone who has the gall and passion to work professionally and create beautiful artwork for everyone involved. Heck, I used to do wildlife photography, and had a very, very loose grip of fashion before I started working in portraiture. However, I channeled the passion I had to learn more about it, and this is where I am now. You can do it as well. Don’t ever feel like you can’t, because that is complete bull.

As an example, I recently was fortune enough to shoot with the absolutely stunning Stefania Ferrario. Those of you who know her may know that she was recently voted Sexy Australian of the Year, is Dita Von Teese’s Australian Rep, has over 450k Instagram Followers, and over 200k Facebook Fans.

Now I’m not stating these facts to attribute Stefania’s only worth down to numbers, but more as a comment on how social proof and following can lead some people to think “I could never work with her, I’m not worthy enough”.

I can tell you first hand that Stefania is an absolutely lovely person. Throughout the whole time I have known her she has been nothing but fun, approachable, and so incredibly easy to talk to. Stefania, like so many awesome models, is also a real community engager, and has shot with a whole incredible range of fantastic photographers, from novices to industry pros.

Don’t be intimidated by these numbers; behind the fandom and well deserved following these models have lies a real person who has a real passion for the industry they work in (I appreciate I sound like the most broken record in the world right now).

Stefania’s incredible modeling career has been spurred on her being passionate, thoughtful, and engaged about what she does, and her love for creating beautiful art.

Principle 5: You should be aiming to develop a strong, personal, and professional relationship with everyone you come into contact with.

As with so many art scenes and industries, it isn’t always what you know, but who you know. I have seen photographers who don’t have the technical skills when it comes to shooting as some of the big name photographers, but they have a huge following and people will sing their praises constantly, because they put the effort in to build strong working relationships with people.

This can be anything from offering help to another photographer, trying their best to assemble a team so that they can get a model published in a magazine, or giving a recommendation to other photographers when asked about a potential job when you may not be available. The fashion and portraiture is stronger as a community, and people who take the time to help each other do not go un-noticed.

For example I once was contacted for a professional paid shoot because a model I worked with had told her friends that I gave her free advice on how to improve her iPhone photography. This conversation I had maybe took up about 5 messages over Facebook over the course of about 2 hours.

Building a good professional working relationship with models and other creatives will help you get noticed, and help better your reputation.

Saying that, you have to be genuine. People will always value others who are honest, genuine, and passionate. Don’t expect anything in return and do it because you want the community, of which you are a part of, to grow as a whole.

Part 2 – Best practices and techniques for working with models

With the above principles in place, you should now have a good mental base for now learning how to actually set up a shoot, and most importantly, how to communicate and work with models effectively.

The process of how to set up a shoot from start to finish can seen like a daunting task. However, once you get the fundamental process down, you’ll find it is a breeze from start to finish.

I want to give you a breakdown of how I work with a model at different stages of a photoshoot.

Arranging a Shoot

I’m not going to go into a heap of detail on where to find models here, but I will tell you that one of the most common ways to arrange a TFP (Time For Print) photoshoot, is by joining your local area’s Modelling Facebook Group. Trust me, unless you live out in the wilds, there should always be a local one if you search on Facebook; and if you can’t see one for your local area, set it up!

Here is how it usually works; you will go onto the Facebook group, and post something like:

Calling all models / MUA / creatives!

I’m new to the fashion and portraiture world and am looking to set up my first shoot with some willing creatives! I’m 30, and have previously shot real estate and wildlife but am really excited to get into the fashion world!

I’d like to arrange a shoot with a natural boho theme in the local national park this weekend.

Please find below my recent work, and inspiration photos for the shoot!

My Facebook page is http://ift.tt/2ng4U07 if you want to check out some more or my work and a bit more about me.

Looking forward to hearing from you!

This instantly lays a good base for you to then arrange a shoot with people who will PM you in response, or reply to the request. From there you will want to see who replies, and if you feel the model is a good fit, you can get them on board for the shoot.

If you take the time to create a thoughtful and passionate post showcasing what you are all about, chances are you will get a good response and be able to start shooting with other local creatives.

So just some basic pointers for when you do talk to models for the first time:

Use correct spelling, grammar, and punctuation. I can’t stress this enough. Please. If you can’t be bothered to spell the word ‘there’ properly, how can you assure someone that you can be bothered to edit their photos properly?

Don’t be demanding. Remember that people do have busy lives, and the majority of people who do TFP shoots aren’t able to supplement their entire income with modelling gigs. If a model says they want to shoot but when you send them a message they don’t get back to you, leave it. Archive the message and move onto who is interested. This isn’t being mean but maybe they have changed their mind, or something has come up. Don’t blame, persecute, or harass people. This is unprofessional, rude, and just not appropriate. You can find out a bit more about the model in terms of what they have done previously, but keep it based around the job at hand. By this I mean don’t start asking personal questions about their private life, when not everyone is comfortable about that. Remember this conversation is about working on a photoshoot, not about how long they have been with their partner for.

If you want to, arrange to have a coffee together to introduce yourself; however this isn’t necessary or possible in some cases. When I first started out, I did this with every model, as I wanted to show off my portfolio in person, and explain what I’m all about. This was especially helpful considering I didn’t have a huge portfolio, and nobody really knew me. I highly recommend doing this for photographers new to the scene. It goes without saying that you pay for the coffee as well.

If a model doesn’t want to work with you, or isn’t available for a shoot, don’t take it personally. There can be a lot of ego involved in photography, and as per Principle 5, you want to make sure you are helping build a strong community. So if it turns out that it just doesn’t work with a model, don’t take offense. There may be a whole myriad of reasons you don’t know about for why they don’t want to do the shoot, or arrange a shoot with you.

The Day of the Shoot

So now that you’ve set up the shoot, here comes the big day; shooting and directing the model. It can see pretty daunting right? Well I have a great series of points here which showcase exactly how I operate, and how you can direct a comfortable, fun, and awesome photoshoot.

One of the more challenging aspects of a photoshoot can be how to direct a model. However, once you learn a few principles and techniques, you’ll find it a lot easier.

These little points are all based on basic politeness and decency. These are some of the key things I do:

1. Chat with the model

As previous mentioned, you have to remember that at the end of the day, models are people too. When I first meet up with a model on location, I will more or less always ask “How has your day been?”. This is a simple opener to help everyone relax and get into a chilled conversation.

2. Remember to compliment the model

Models will go to a lot of effort to get ready for a photoshoot, and there is nothing more flattering than a simple “you look amazing!” from the photographer. Don’t be fake about it, but obviously they will look incredible as you got them on the shoot, and this is a perfect little confidence and ego boost!

3. Ask the model thoughtful questions about their experience with photoshoots, and anything else that isn’t too personal.

People love to talk about themselves. This has been proved by a mountain of scientific studies, and of course every day life! You love to talk about yourself when asked a question right? I’m not going to lie, I do!

So when you are working with a model and in-between shooting, ask them questions about what they enjoy about modeling, if they have done any shoots lately with any other photographers, and if they have been published before. I do genuinely find these kind of chats interesting and have learnt a lot about the local fashion photography scene as a result!

If you are on good terms with the model, then feel free to ask other questions about how they are finding work, and if they have been busy; but only do this if you are on good terms as it can sometimes wander into the realm on ‘too personal’.

4. Do not touch the model or their clothing without first asking permission, and only do so if it is necessary.

Another key philosophy I have when it comes to working with models is that you shouldn’t need to touch a model on a photoshoot. I believe it can be a little bit too personal, and opens the possibility of photographers breaking boundaries and acting inappropriately.

Directing can be tough sometimes, and it does take time to get comfortable. However one thing I will always say is that if you are having a hard time trying to direct a model into a pose, do the pose you want yourself (yes, yourself!) and then get the model to mimic you. Not only does this work well, but also will probably elicit a laugh or two which eases the pressure off even more.

In all of the 100+ photoshoots I’ve done, I only probably had to touch a model once or twice, and that is just because a leaf was caught in their hair and it was easier for me to remove it for them. In this case as well, I told them “there is a leaf caught in your hair, would you be ok if I got rid of that?”, and only when a “yes” came back, I’d do it.

If you have an idea in your head of the specific pose you want a model to emulate, there is no better way than to do the pose yourself so that the model can mimic you. There should be no reason to touch the model, unless the model has explicitly agreed to it and it is necassary.

5. Tell everyone on set that you will need five minutes to scout out the next shot before setting up

This was probably one of the biggest game changers for me when I learnt how to do fashion photography. With so much rushing around and perceived pressure, it is so incredibly easy to rush around and try to get a hundred shots in ten minutes.

Simply stop and tell everyone that you’ll need five minutes to get an idea for the next shot, and they can relax. People will be more than happy to find another few minutes to relax.

6. When it comes to directing, if you try something and it doesn’t work, don’t stress

Directing was a big challenge for me when it came to my first experiences with moving a model into place, and setting a scene up. After doing over 100 shoots I can honestly tell you do not get stressed or worried if something doesn’t work out.

So what do you do if you pose someone and it doesn’t look great? I have the solution. Simply tell the model to ‘relax’. This will put them at ease, and stopping the pose, hitting the reset button and allowing you then to take a few minutes to reassess what you want to do next (as per point 4 above).

Please trust me when I say that I have had a whole ton of posing directions which didn’t work before getting that one pose which did work. Don’t let it get to you, and above all just take your time.

Directing models can be tough, and you will find that sometimes that a pose you think looks good in your head, won’t play out so well in real life. That is part of the creative process, and I can tell you that it is completely normal and happens more times than not! However, this is the learning process, so don’t give up and keep trying! The above pose we got after trying three other poses, and it was great to.. from DIYS http://ift.tt/2nh1Osq

#DIYS

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