#i swear i either wrote the words 'you burn for me' into a fic or i said it in a convo

[helioooss]

music girlfriend

synopsis: you’re the weirdest loser karina has ever met in her life, but you’re cute. and different. and she might just like you. (loser girlfriend x mean girlfriend core)

w/c: 5k+

warnings: swearing, lots of it; mentions of bullying. like always, read at your own risk :)

a/n: a concept like this was my first ever fic…except that it was way more toxic and horrifying. i’ve rewritten it. but just reading something i wrote over 10 years ago makes me CRINGE

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

yu jimin is a force of nature on campus; the kind of girl people talk about in hushed tones, partly out of awe and partly out of fear. she’s got a reputation that precedes her: mean, cold and walls higher than the burj khalifa itself.

she doesn’t mince words, and her insults almost always land with surgical precision. you don’t cross her unless you’re looking to get burned, and even then, it’s not guaranteed she’ll care enough to react.

people say she’s a heartbreaker, and the rumours aren’t exactly subtle. she’s the type who’s been through a messy breakup or two, you’d never know it by looking at her though.

karina, as everyone liked to call her, doesn’t mess around with vulnerability: she does leather jackets, sharp eyeliner, and a smile that’s more threatening than warm.

most of her relationships don’t last long; people get too close, then quickly realize that they’re only scratching the surface of someone who’s built walls too high to climb.

and, then, there’s you. you’re not even remotely on her radar, like at all. unless you count that one time she stared you down just for coughing in her presence. you remember it vividly: it was a wednesday morning, and you were hurrying to class when you caught a coughing fit through the hall after attempting to chug a tropical juice box in two minutes.

unfortunately, she was passing by at the exact moment you let out a loud, ragged cough, and she stopped dead in her tracks; fixing you with a death glare that never left until you were out of sight.

“are you fucking kidding me?” she yells out as you practically run away. “loser!”

that stare was enough to make you want to crawl into a hole and disappear, and it cemented your fear of her. you’ve avoided her ever since, not that it’s been difficult — she’s too wrapped up in her own world to notice someone like you anyway.

yet, despite the fear and the certainty that she’d tear you to shreds if given the chance, you never miss an aespa gig.

every friday night, you make your way to the dingy dive bar outside of campus where they perform, staking out your usual spot in the far corner with a ginger beer in hand because you couldn’t stand the taste of anything else, but you only ever manage to drink half before losing interest. it’s not about the drink; it’s about watching her own the stage.

you sit there, trying not to make eye contact, trying to be as invisible as possible while simultaneously wishing she would look your way, just once….in a way that isn’t terrifying.

of course she doesn’t notice you. or at least, she pretends not to. she’s too busy flirting with half the room, her eyes sharp and her voice carrying over the crowd like a spell.

your only real friend on campus is yunjin, your roommate, who’s the complete opposite of you —confident, outgoing and friends with pretty much everyone.

she talks about the girls in aespa often, but you never really pay attention because, well, you’re usually too busy trying to complete a lego set or desperately attempting to finish either a boss in wu-kong, or a quest in dead island 2. in desperate times, you turn to call of duty though.

one saturday evening, as you’re halfway through building a lego roller coaster on the kitchen table, zero human interaction, yunjin drops a bombshell.

“hey, by the way, aespa’s coming over tonight,” she announces casually, as if she’s talking about ordering pizza, fingers twirling her hair and all.

you don’t even look up from your seat. “uh-huh, cool.”

“no, like, they’re actually coming here. to our dorm,” she repeats, clearly trying to make sure it sinks in.

you snap a lego piece into place and nod absentmindedly. “yeah, i hear ya.”

yunjin sighs, clearly defeated. “you’re really not listening, are you?”

“nope,” you admit, focusing intently on the roller coaster track.

“can you please get a girlfriend?” she leaves you to yourself and retreats back into the couch, shaking her head at how hopeless you are. “god, this place needs another woman.”

and then, maybe fifteen minutes later, it finally registers. aespa. karina. here. in your dorm. you’re in your toy story pyjamas with fresh spaghetti stains on it.

you freeze mid-piece placement, your eyes going wide as panic washes over you. “wait, did you say aespa is coming here?”

yunjin looks up from her phone, a grin spreading across her face. “finally paying attention, huh? yeah, they’ll be here any minute.”

“jennifer, are you serious?!” you practically yell, scrambling to your feet, knocking over half your lego set in the process.

“very serious,” she says, clearly enjoying your reaction.

you don’t waste any more time. there’s only one thing to do: that’s to get the hell out of there. before yunjin can say another word, you’re darting down the hall, your feet barely touching the floor. you burst into your room and start throwing things into your bag, moving with a speed you didn’t know you had.

“are you really running away?” yunjin calls after you, chuckling.

“yes!” you shout back, shoving random clothes into your bag. “i can’t deal with this!”

“you’re such a wimp!” she teases, but there’s affection in her voice. “you’ll be fine, i promise —“

“absolutely not,” you cut her off as you slam your door shut. you grab your keys, yank open your window and climb out onto the fire escape, your heart pounding.

as you make your escape, you look down and realise you’ve left a trail of legos behind you, tiny colourful pieces marking your pathetic retreat.

meanwhile, aespa finally arrives. winter, the band’s chaotic drummer, is sprawled on your couch, balancing a bottle of cheap beer on her forehead. ningning, the bassist, is rummaging through your snack drawer like she’s on a mission from god. giselle, the lead guitarist, is inspecting your lego collection with an expression that’s equal parts curiosity and confusion. and then there’s karina — leaning against the counter, looking bored and vaguely annoyed, like she’s too cool for this entire dorm (which she probably is).

“so, where’s this lego nerd?” ningning asks, looking around the living room.

“oh, y/n? she…left,” yunjin says with a shrug, trying not to laugh. “like ran away when i said you guys were coming over.”

“scared of us?” winter asks, looking offended. “we’re not that bad.”

“no,” yunjin adds, shaking her head. “she just really sucks at socialising but once you get to a point, she will yap your ears off.”

“it’s karina,” giselle says knowingly, nudging the singer with a grin. “she’s the scary one.”

karina just rolls her eyes, unfazed. “whatever. if she’s that much of a coward, she’s not worth worrying about.”

as she glances around the room, her eyes land on the half-finished lego set on the kitchen table. she moves closer, her gaze shifting from indifferent to slightly intrigued. she picks up a piece, examining it for a moment.

“what’s this supposed to be?” she asks, holding up the stray lego.

“a roller coaster,” yunjin replies, still smiling. “she’s been working on it all day.”

karina raises an eyebrow, setting the piece back down. “interesting.”

“what, the legos or the girl?” giselle teases.

“both,” karina admits, her voice low and thoughtful. and for a moment, just a moment, her usual cold demeanor softens. “she’s kind of weird, isn’t she? fucking coughed on me once and it just set me off.”

“so you know of her?” giselle raises an eyebrow, a playful smirk on her face.

karina frowns. “what the hell is your deal?”

“definitely,” yunjin cuts them off before they get started. “she’s into video games and all that nerdy shit. has never had a girlfriend in her life, but she’s gorgeous and funny in her own way.”

karina hums, her gaze lingering on the legos. “i’ll be the judge of that.”

meanwhile, you’ve been hiding out at the park not too far from your dorm for a while now, perched awkwardly on a bench — staring blankly at a nearby pigeon that’s scavenging for crumbs. it was the first place you could think of in your panic, but now that the adrenaline is wearing off, your stomach is making very loud complaints.

“great,” you mutter to yourself, pressing a hand to your rumbling belly. you didn’t plan this escape well. you don’t have money on you…just your keys and the few legos you hastily shoved in your pockets.

with a sigh, you finally accept defeat. “screw it,” you mutter, pushing yourself off the bench. “i’ll just sneak in, grab some food, and sneak back out.”

you start making your way back to the dorm, trying to convince yourself that you can avoid those girls altogether. if you’re lucky, they’ll be too busy talking to yunjin or trying to figure out the roller coaster you abandoned on the kitchen table.

approaching your dorm cautiously on your tippy toes, you open door as quietly as possible, sets of laughter audible from the living room — familiar voices that make you both excited and anxious.

you manage to sneak inside unnoticed, keeping your head down as you head straight for the kitchen.

the fridge is glowing right in front of you, immediately grabbing the nearest thing you see: a pack of cheese sticks and a pineapple juice box. you’re so focused on grabbing food and getting out of there that you don’t notice the figure leaning casually against the kitchen counter.

“back so soon, coward?”

you freeze, and slowly turn to find no one else but karina standing there. she’s holding a half-finished lego roller coaster piece, looking at you with a mix of amusement and something else you can’t quite read.

“oh,” you croak out, feeling your face heat up. “i was just…hungry.”

she raises an eyebrow, her expression somewhere between disbelief and mockery. “hungry enough to risk coming back into enemy territory?”

“it’s not enemy territory,” you mutter, peeling the wrapper off the cheese stick awkwardly. “i just panicked.”

karina’s smirk widens. “because of me?”

“maybe,” you admit reluctantly, taking a bite of the cheese stick. “you’re kind of scary, you know.”

“good,” she replies smoothly, stepping closer. “keeps people on their toes.”

“it definitely kept me out the door,” you mumble, trying not to flinch as she moves even closer. you notice she’s still holding the lego piece, twirling it between her fingers like she’s trying to figure it out.

“so,” she says, her voice dropping a notch, “what’s with the legos? seriously. i mean, a roller coaster?”

you glance at the half-built model on the table, feeling both embarrassed and defensive. “what’s wrong with a roller coaster?”

“nothing,” she replies, surprisingly sincere. “it’s just unexpected considering you’re over twenty.”

“what the hell is that supposed to mean?” you ask, narrowing your eyes.

she shrugs, her gaze shifting between you and the legos. “i’ve never met anyone who builds a roller coaster in the middle of a saturday night. alone.”

“what kind of person do i seem like, then?” you challenge, more curious than offended.

“the kind that runs away when someone like me shows up,” karina shoots back, but there’s no malice in her tone; just that familiar teasing edge.

you feel your face heat up again, but you manage to hold her gaze. “well, maybe i just don’t know how to deal with someone like you.”

“and what’s someone like me?” she asks, taking a step closer.

“mean,” you say bluntly, surprising even yourself.

karina blinks, caught off guard. “you coughed on me.”

“you remember that?”

“i felt a splash on my face you sore loser,” she whines, remembering the day so clearly. she watches you for a moment, then she gestures to the roller coaster. “so, are you gonna finish this or what?”

“i was planning to,” you say defensively. “it’s not my fault i got interrupted.”

“by yourself?” she raises an eyebrow at you.

“by you,” you correct, feeling a strange mix of frustration and attraction.

her eyes narrow playfully. “well, i’m here now. so, let’s finish it.”

“you want to help me?” you ask, genuinely surprised.

“why not?” she says, picking up another lego piece. “i’ve got nothing better to do, but come meet everyone first.”

you eventually shuffle into the living room, feeling like you’re walking into a lion’s den. the place is chaos: winter is trying to balance on one leg while shouting about something unintelligible, ningning is tearing into a bag of doritos with alarming enthusiasm, and giselle is inspecting your lego city sets like she’s discovered a hidden temple.

“look who it is!” ningning calls, grinning at you with chip dust on her fingers. “finally decided to join us, huh?”

“i was busy,” you say awkwardly.

“busy hiding,” karina corrects, plopping down next to you on the couch with a casualness that makes your heart rate spike.

“it’s not hiding,” you mutter. “it’s called strategic retreat.”

she shrugs. “sure, whatever helps you sleep at night.”

“she’s literally just a girl,” yunjin chuckles, taking the first sip off her beer before grimacing. “what is this shit?”

winter suddenly flops onto the floor in front of you, looking up with wide eyes. “so, do you build like castles and stuff? or just boring things like a roller coaster?”

you frown defensively. “it’s interesting!”

“wow,” winter says, clearly unimpressed. “that’s so nerdy, i think i just lost 10 cool girl points talking to you.”

you roll your eyes. “i didn’t think you had 10 cool girl points to begin with,” the room erupts in laughter, and you can’t help but feel a small sense of triumph.

“ohhh, she got heat!” giselle hollers, slapping her knee dramatically.

karina leans closer, her voice low enough that only you can hear. “you’re funny.”

you blink, caught off-guard by her close proximity. “uh, thanks?”

“don’t get too excited,” she adds, a bored look on her face. “i still think you’re weird.”

“i know,” you reply simply. “but that’s kind of my thing.”

somehow, yunjin turns the tv on and you end up in an impromptu mario kart tournament, with winter yelling instructions at everyone like an overly aggressive coach.

“take the shortcut, take the fucking shortcut!” she screams, despite the fact that she’s not even playing.

you manage to hold your own, despite ningning’s attempts to distract you by waving doritos in your face and giselle’s shameless attempts to use every dirty trick in the book. you’re neck and neck with karina, who’s surprisingly good and also surprisingly ruthless.

“you play dirty,” you accuse as she sends a blue shell your way, knocking you out of first place.

“you say that like it’s a bad thing,” karina retorts with a frown.

“it is a bad thing,” you insist. “only jerks use the blue shell.”

“guess i’m a jerk, then,” she adds, not looking the least bit sorry.

“you’re the worst,” you say, but there’s no heat behind it. in fact, you’re kind of having fun.

“i’ll take that as a compliment,” she says, flashing you a victorious smile as she crosses the finish line.

“you shouldn’t,” you mutter, trying to sound annoyed but failing miserably because karina just smiled at you for the first time in your life.

as the night goes on, the group slowly starts to mellow out. winter has passed out on the floor, snoring softly with an empty can of beer in her hand. ningning and yunjin are sprawled across the couch, humming some random tune and giselle is poking at your lego millennium falcon with a mix of fascination and confusion.

karina is still sitting next to you, her elbow resting on the back of the couch. “so,” she says, breaking the comfortable silence, “you really like legos, huh?”

you nod. “yeah. it’s kind of my thing.”

“i can see that,” she says, glancing around at your impressive collection. “it’s such a loser vibe.”

you raise an eyebrow. “hey, you’re not the first to say that.”

“i’ll make sure i’ll be the last.”

you laugh, feeling a strange warmth in your chest. “well, thanks, i guess. you’re not as scary as i thought you’d be.”

“i can be scary,” she insists, narrowing her eyes for effect. “maybe one day i can build one with you, deal?”

“woah, okay,” you say, grinning back. “a deal it is then.”

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

since that unexpected night at your dorm, things between you and karina have taken an unexpected turn. it’s not exactly friendship —karina’s still mean, still cold in that familiar way, but there’s a new rhythm to it, a pattern of teasing that you’re surprisingly getting used to.

whenever you pass each other in the hallways, she makes it a point to throw some kind of insult your way, usually with a smirk that’s equal parts mocking and playful.

“hey, loser,” karina calls as you’re trying to balance a stack of books in your arms.

“hi,” you shoot back with a smile, doing your best to sound unfazed.

“nice outfit,” she adds, eyeing your oversized hoodie and faded jeans. “did you rob a fucking thrift store for that look?”

“maybe,” you reply with a grin. “at least i’m consistent!”

she laughs (surprising everyone around her), her eyes flashing with that familiar mix of amusement and something else — something warmer. “still a loser, though.”

“and what about it?” you retort, shaking your head as she walks away, still chuckling.

it becomes a routine over the next few days. each time you cross paths, karina manages to find some new way to tease you. whether it’s about your outfit, your habit of carrying too many books, or your eternal obsession with legos, her comments are always mean-spirited, but in a way that somehow makes you smile because you know she doesn’t mean any of it.

“what, still working on legos?” she asks one morning, catching sight of a lego manual sticking out of your bag.

“yep,” you say brightly. “gotta build something, right?”

“how pathetic,” she drawls, but there’s a spark in her eyes that betrays the insult.

“at least i’m consistent,” you say, giving her a mock salute as you pass by.

not everyone understands the strange dynamic between you and karina. a group of boys in the football team who’ve been eyeing the whole thing decides to get in on the fun — or at least what they think is fun.

one afternoon, as you’re making your way across campus, you hear someone call out, “hey, loser! still building legos? what are you, five?”

you turn, your stomach sinking as you realize it’s not karina, but felix who is doing a poor imitation of her usual teasing. his tone lacks the playful edge, replaced with something harsher, meaner.

“seriously, you’re still into that kid stuff?” jake sneers, towering over you. “what, got nothing better to do with your life?”

you try to laugh it off, shaking your head. “just having fun, guys.”

“yeah, real fun,” taehyun mutters. “no wonder karina only talks to you to make fun of you.”

you flinch at that, the words cutting deeper than you expected. before you can think of a response, someone else steps in.

“hey! back off,” yunjin shouts, marching over with fire in her eyes. “what’s your problem?”

they all look momentarily startled, but jake just shrugs. “we were just joking around, yunjin. it’s not a big deal.”

“well, it’s not fucking funny to me,” yunjin snaps, her voice loud enough to draw attention. “and if i see you messing with her again, you’ll have to deal with me. got it?”

they mumble a few half-hearted apologies before retreating, clearly not expecting to get yelled at in public.

yunjin turns to you, her expression softening. “are you okay?”

“yeah,” you say, trying to sound nonchalant. “i’m fine.”

your roommate isn’t convinced, knowing you better than anyone else. she pulls you aside and demands to know if this has been happening often. you try to brush it off, insisting it’s just dumb teasing, but she’s not having it.

“i’m telling karina,” she says, her voice firm.

“don’t,” you plead, but she’s already walking off, determined to set things right. “it literally just started today!”

when yunjin finds karina, she doesn’t hold back. “your stupid jock friends have been picking on y/n,” she says bluntly. “all thanks to your teasing.”

karina’s eyes narrow instantly. “what? who?”

“those idiots on the football team,” yunjin explains, crossing her arms. “they think it’s funny to imitate you.”

karina’s expression darkens, a mixture of anger and something else — something protective. “where is she?”

“probably at lunch by now,” yunjin replies. “but karina, don’t just—”

“i’m going,” karina interrupts, her voice leaving no room for argument. she stalks off toward the cafeteria, her jaw set and her steps quick.

you’re sitting alone in the cafeteria, picking at your food and trying not to let the earlier incident get to you, but before you can get too lost in your thoughts, you hear a familiar voice.

“hey assholes,” karina calls sharply, her voice loud enough to turn heads. “got something to say to y/n here?”

you look up, startled, as she strides over to your table with the same jocks from before trailing behind her. they look a lot less cocky now, their heads bowed in a mix of embarrassment and fear.

“uh, we’re sorry,” felix mumbles first, barely making eye contact. “we were just messing around.”

yunjin’s eyes flash dangerously. “yeah? well, don’t. she’s off-limits.”

“seriously,” karina deadpans, her arms crossed - voice cold and mean. “if i see you pricks messing around with her again, you can say goodbye to your scholarships.”

you sit there, stunned and unsure of how to react. you weren’t expecting this; definitely not karina marching in like a one-woman army to defend you.

the boys mumble a few more apologies before scurrying off, leaving you alone with karina and yunjin.

karina lets out a slow breath, her expression still serious. “you okay?”

“i’m fine,” you say, still processing everything. “you didn’t have to do that.”

“yes, i did,” karina replies, her voice softer now. “and…i’m sorry.”

you blink, caught off guard by the sudden apology. “for what?”

“for making it seem like it’s okay to be mean to you,” she says, her tone unusually sincere. “i didn’t mean for it to go that far.”

you shrug, trying to play it off. “it’s fine. i know you were just messing around.”

“still,” she insists, her eyes meeting yours with an intensity that makes your heart skip a beat. “i don’t want you to feel like that. not because of me.”

you manage a small smile, the warmth in her voice easing the lingering hurt. “thanks.”

karina looks almost relieved, her smile returning in full force. “so, we’re good?”

“we’re good,” you confirm, feeling a strange mix of gratitude.

and as karina sits down next to you, the rest of the girls start joining in.

you’re sitting in the crowded lunch hall, trying to enjoy your chips while listening to giselle talk about some wild party they’re planning. as usual, karina is scrolling through her phone like she’s half-bored, half-amused by everything around her.

you pop another chip into your mouth and crunch loudly, completely unaware of how it sounds in the echoing hall.

“jesus, y/n,” karina suddenly blurts out, her voice louder than necessary and back to her usual self. “could you chew any louder? i’m pretty sure they can hear you in the next building.”

you pause mid-chew, feeling a blush creeping up your neck. “sorry,” you mumble, covering your mouth with your hand. “i didn’t realize it was that bad.”

she rolls her eyes, but there’s a hint of a grin tugging at her lips. “you sound like a woodchipper. it’s a miracle i’m still sitting next to you.”

“you could always move,” you say, trying to sound unfazed.

“nah,” she replies, leaning back in her chair and crossing her arms. “someone’s gotta keep an eye on you, make sure you don’t choke on those chips.”

you catch the faintest smirk on her face, and despite her words, you can’t help but smile. “you’re all heart, karina.”

she shrugs, pretending not to care. “you’re lucky i like charity cases.”

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

one day, karina manages to pull you out of your room and invites you over at the campus skate park. she’s doing tricks on her board like it’s the most natural thing in the world. you, on the other hand, are struggling just to stand on the board without wobbling like a newborn deer.

“come on, y/n,” she taunts, skating over to you with a smirk. “it’s not that hard. just balance, push off, and roll. even a baby can handle that.”

“easy for you to say,” you mutter, trying not to fall over.

she rolls her eyes but skates closer, reaching out to steady you. “here, let me show you. put one foot here, and the other here,” she instructs, positioning your feet.

you follow her instructions, but as soon as you try to push off, you lose your balance and crash to the ground with a loud thud.

her teasing expression instantly shifts to one of panic, her eyes wide as she crouches down next to you. “oh my god, are you okay? did you break anything?”

“just my dignity,” you groan, rubbing your sore butt.

“idiot,” she mutters, but there’s no heat in her voice. she offers you a hand, pulling you back up with surprising gentleness. “you fucking scared me, you know.”

“didn’t think you cared,” you tease, but there’s a warmth in your chest at her reaction.

“well, someone’s gotta keep you from killing yourself,” she says, her tone gruff but her grip lingering on your arm a bit longer than necessary. “just…try not to die, okay? i’m not ready to be a witness to your embarrassing end.”

“don’t worry,” you reply with a grin. “i’ll keep falling just to see that worried look on your face.”

she scoffs, but there’s no hiding the small smile that creeps across her lips. “you’re impossible.”

“and you’re mean,” you say, but there’s no real bite behind it.

“yeah, well,” she says, stepping back onto her board. “i only pick on the ones i like, loser.”

you watch as she skates away, your heart doing an odd little flip. this wasn’t good.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

it’s a rare moment of downtime in aespa’s usual whirlwind of rehearsals and chaos. the four of them are lounging in the practice room, sipping on energy drinks and half-heartedly tuning their instruments. giselle’s strumming random chords on her guitar, winter’s scrolling through her phone and ningning’s lounging on the floor, doing absolutely nothing.

karina’s leaning against the wall, her eyes distant and her expression unusually serious. she’s been quieter than usual lately, and it hasn’t gone unnoticed by the others.

“yo karina,” giselle suddenly says, breaking the silence. “what’s up your ass? you’re freaking me out.”

“nothing,” karina replies quickly, a little too quickly. “why are you always up my ass?”

“oh, please,” winter scoffs, looking up from her phone. “this is about y/n, isn’t it?”

her face stiffens, and she tries to play it off with an eye roll. “why would it be about her?”

“uh, maybe because you’ve been obsessed with her for weeks?” ningning chimes in, smirking. “seriously, the way you look at her, it’s like you’re trying to set her on fire with your eyes.”

the girl under interrogation’s cheeks flush slightly, but she keeps her expression neutral. “i just think she’s funny, that’s all.”

“sure,” giselle says, drawing out the word like she’s speaking to a child. “and i think jacob elordi is funny too.”

she glares at her, but it’s half-hearted. “you don’t know what you’re fucking talking about.”

“really? bullshit,” ningning continues, sitting up and crossing her legs. “it’s obvious you like her. the teasing, the constant calling her a loser, that thing where you get all weirdly protective of her? classic crush behavior.”

karina scowls, hating how transparent she apparently is. “she’s interesting.”

“interesting, huh?” winter teases, raising an eyebrow. “interesting enough to make you lose your cool every time she’s around.”

“whatever,” she mutters, turning away slightly. but her attempt at indifference only makes the others laugh harder. “fuck off.”

“you know, y/n’s actually not bad-looking,” ningning comments casually. “she’s kind of cute in that nerdy way.”

“if she cut her hair a little and maybe wore something that wasn’t a hoodie three sizes too big,” giselle adds, grinning, “she’d probably have all the girls swooning.”

karina’s jaw tightens at that, her mood shifting from defensive to something closer to possessive. “she doesn’t need to change anything,” she says flatly.

“ohhh,” winter coos, catching the change in her tone. “you know, i actually heard a couple of girls in my class talking about how cute y/n is. one of them even said she’d ask her out if she got the chance.”

“what?” karina snaps, her eyes narrowing. “who said that?”

winter grins, delighted by karina’s reaction. “oh, i don’t know. just some girls, but they sounded pretty serious.”

she stands up abruptly, her whole body tense. “which class is this?”

“whoa, chill,” giselle laughs, her eyes wide with amusement. “you’re not actually jealous, are you?”

her expression is a mix of annoyance and something deeper. “i just don’t like the idea of people trying to mess with her, that’s all. she’s my friend.”

“sure,” ningning says, her voice dripping with sarcasm. “and i’m sure this sudden urge to go find her has nothing to do with jealousy.”

“whatever,” karina mutters again, already heading for the door. “i’ll be back.”

“where are you going?” winter calls after her, though she’s pretty sure she knows the answer.

“to make sure y/n’s okay,” she replies over her shoulder, her voice leaving no room for argument.

the other members burst into laughter as she disappears down the hall, clearly unable to resist the pull she feels toward you.

she makes her way to the building where she knows your class is held. she doesn’t exactly know which room you’re in, but that doesn’t stop her from pacing the hallway, her eyes darting to every door like she’s on a mission.

she leans against the wall, trying to play it cool, but her mind is racing. the thought of someone else being interested in you makes her blood boil in a way she doesn’t fully understand. it’s not like she’s made her own intentions clear, but the idea of you with someone else, it just doesn’t sit right.

she waits outside the classroom building for what feels like an eternity, her patience wearing thin. students start filtering out, and karina’s eyes scan each face, looking for you. she feels a strange mix of anticipation and anxiety, and she hates it.

finally, she spots you. you’re walking out with your head down, clutching a book to your chest. when you look up and see karina, your eyes widen in surprise.

“karina?” you ask, stopping in your tracks. “what are you doing here?”

she shrugs, trying to act casual despite the fact that she’s clearly been waiting for you. “just passing by.”

“really?” you ask, raising an eyebrow. “you’re ‘just passing by’ outside my class?”

karina scratches the back of her neck, looking uncharacteristically awkward. “maybe i wanted to make sure you weren’t gonna trip over on the way to your next class.”

“are you serious?”

her expression shifts slightly, her usual confidence faltering. “maybe.”

you can’t help but smile, a mixture of disbelief and amusement on your face. “you’re unbelievable, you know that?”

“i know, i’ll walk you to your class anyways.”

and for the first time, there’s no teasing, no sarcasm, just a moment of comfortable silence between the two of you.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

it’s a lazy afternoon, and you and karina are sitting on the floor of your dorm, legs stretched out as you dive into a bag of cheetos.

yunjin left the room to run errands, leaving you and karina in rare company. she came over to drop something off to yunjin, band stuff they said, even though your roommate could not be in one for the life of her.

“these are so good,” you mumble, licking the orange dust off your fingers as you looked at the screen in front of you.

karina watches you with an expression that’s equal parts disgusted and fascinated. “you’re a mess,” she comments, her tone as dry as ever.

“thanks,” you reply cheerfully, taking another handful of cheetos. but as you reach for your drink, you accidentally brush karina’s arm with your cheetos-stained fingers.

she flinches dramatically, her eyes wide. “oh my god, you did not just touch me with those filthy fingers.”

you stare at her, half-amused, half-embarrassed. “oh, come on. it’s not like it’s toxic waste.”

“might as well be,” she snaps, though there’s a glint of amusement in her eyes. “look at what you did!” she adds, pointing at the faint cheeto dust now smeared on her porcelain skin.

“sorry,” you laugh, grabbing a tissue and trying to wipe it off, only for karina to pull back like you’re trying to brand her.

“don’t touch me!”

“you’re such a drama queen,” you say, still laughing.

she scowls, but there’s no real anger behind it. “one of these days, you’re going to have to find someone else to hang out with.”

“and one of these days, you’re gonna admit you like hanging out with me, cheetos fingers and all,” you retort.

“don’t push your lock, loser,” her eyes narrow, but she can’t hide the small smile tugging at her lips. “come to our gig this weekend, please?”

you shook your head - unfortunately, you had plans. “i can’t, i promised mina i’d join her party tonight.”

and within a second, karina inches closer towards you — burning holes through your face. “mina? party? what?”

“oh, not that kind of party,” you don’t pick up on the way her tone changes. “it’s a chat party, we’re gonna play games all night and —“

“who is this mina?” her tone shifts and you don’t miss the way she clenches her jaw. “is she a girl from one of your classes?”

“she’s from japan, really cool and she sings too, sometimes she sends me legos from japan.”

“no, you’re coming to our gig,” she shakes her head, not wanting to hear another girl’s name coming out of your mouth. “and that’s final, yes?”

“yes, okay,” the directness catches you off guard but it doesn’t take long to convince you, specially if karina and her dirty stares are involved. plus, you could always join mina’s party later on.

a strange mix of emotions start brewing in your stomach — guilt, excitement and something you can’t quite name. you’ve never been good at reading people, and with karina, everything feels even more complicated. you’ve never liked anyone before, not like this, and the whole thing is so new, so raw. you don’t know if her insistence is just about wanting you in the crowd, or if it means something more.

you’re still trying to process it when karina stands up, stretching lazily. “i should probably get going,” she says, grabbing her jacket from the back of the couch. “ningning’s angry spamming me, i’m late to practice.”

“yeah,” you reply, watching her as she heads for the door. “have fun.”

“can i come over again later?”

you smile, feeling a heap of butterflies down your stomach. “anytime, jimin.”

she gives you one last, lingering look before she leaves, and you’re left alone in the suddenly too-quiet space, your mind racing with questions you don’t know how to answer as you head back to your room and turn your console on.

yunjin returns a while later, as your exactly three hours deep into disco elysium, looking a bit worn out but still cheerful. “hey, i’m back,” she calls, tossing her keys on the table before popping her head in your room. “did i miss anything?”

you hesitate for a moment, then decide to just spill it. “karina invited me to their gig this weekend.”

her eyebrows shoot up. “and? are you going?”

“yeah,” you admit, feeling a mix of excitement and confusion as you put the controller down. “she was really keen about it.”

she studies you for a moment, then sits down next to you, her expression serious. “what’s going on, y/n?”

“i just don’t get her,” you confess, your voice barely above a whisper. “one minute she’s mean, the next she’s nice. and now she’s acting all weird about me going to her gig. and she comes here to hang out with me but i know she’s a heartbreaker and i don’t want —“

“she likes you,” yunjin cuts you off bluntly, as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world.

“but what does that even mean?” you ask, feeling a surge of frustration. “i’ve never…don’t know how to deal with this. why?”

“it means she wants you there because she cares about you,” she explains patiently. “you know you’re a catch right? she even gets jealous when other girls are around you.”

“jealous?” you repeat, the word feeling foreign in this context. “how?”

“yes, jealous,” yunjin confirms, nodding. “karina’s not used to feeling like she’s not the center of someone’s attention, specially yours.”

you let out a sigh, your shoulders slumping. “this is all so confusing. i’ve never liked anyone before. i don’t know what to do.”

“you don’t have to do anything,” yunjin reassures you, her voice gentle. “just be honest with yourself. if you like her, let yourself like her. don’t overthink it.”

“easier said than done,” you mutter.

“i know,” yunjin agrees, her expression sympathetic. “but maybe this is one of those things you have to figure out as you go.”

you nod slowly, feeling a small sense of comfort in her words. “yeah, maybe.”

and as you sit there, replaying the conversation with karina in your mind, you realise that yunjin might be right. maybe this is something you have to navigate one step at a time, no matter how uncertain it feels. because despite everything, one thing is clear: you want to be there, even if you’re not entirely sure what it means.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

the weekend arrives faster than you expect, and soon enough, you’re standing outside the venue for aespa’s gig. the usual nerves are there, made worse by the fact that this time, karina explicitly asked you to be here. yunjin’s with you, chatting excitedly about the show as you both head inside. your mind is elsewhere, tangled up in all the uncertainty that karina’s invitation has stirred up.

“you okay?” yunjin asks, nudging your shoulder as you both make your way to the backstage area.

“yeah,” you lie, forcing a smile. “nervous, i guess.”

“don’t worry,” she reassures you. “it’s gonna be fun, at least you’re finally with me instead of that musty corner.”

you try to take her words to heart, but as you step backstage, a new wave of anxiety hits. the chaotic energy of the crew prepping for the show is overwhelming, and you can’t seem to spot karina anywhere.

“she’s probably getting ready,” yunjin suggests, noticing your fidgeting.

“maybe,” you mutter, but something feels off.

you’ve been backstage before, but never like this. tonight, it’s different because you know karina specifically wants you here, which only makes her absence feel sharper.

after a few more minutes pass and there’s still no sign of her, you make a decision. “i’m gonna go look for her,” you tell the girls.

“want me to come with?” winter ask, looking back at you from the dressing cabinet.

you shake your head. “no, it’s fine. i’ll be quick.”

you wander through the backstage area, dodging equipment and crew members as you make your way toward the quieter sections.

that’s when you spot them: you’re certain it’s karina, standing in a dark corner with another girl, their heads close together.

a sinking feeling forms in your chest. something about the way they’re standing feels too intimate, like you’re intruding on a private moment. you can’t make out their conversation, but then you hear your name.

“y/n? really?” the girl scoffs, her voice dripping with disdain. “you’re actually interested in that pathetic loser?”

you recognise the voice now — it’s soyeon, karina’s ex. the one you’d seen flirting with karina before she even knew you, she was the ex.

karina’s voice is low, almost defensive. “she’s not a loser.”

“could’ve fooled me,” soyeon replies, her tone harsh. “come on, karina, you know she’s just a rebound.”

you feel your face flush, a mix of anger and humiliation burning in your chest. part of you wants to step forward, to confront them both, but your feet feel like they’re stuck to the ground.

then, suddenly, soyeon closes the gap between them, her lips crashing against karina’s. for a moment, she doesn’t pull away. instead, she seems to hesitate, caught between resisting and giving in.

that’s all it takes for you to turn and leave, your heart pounding in your chest. you push your way through the backstage crowd, barely registering yunjin calling after you. everything feels like a blur, like the world has tilted sideways and you’re the only one struggling to stay upright.

the whispers warned you — she’s a heartbreaker who still can’t get over her hot ex. and you really should’ve listened.

you’re back at your dorm before you even know how you got there. you slump onto your bed, trying to make sense of what you just saw. your emotions are a confusing mess of hurt, anger and a crushing sense of betrayal.

all the uncertainty you’d been feeling, all the questions you’d tried to answer, now feel pointless.

you’re not sure how much time passes as you sat in front of your tv, mina and some of your friends are on the other end of the screen, but then there’s a loud knock at the door.

“y/n! open up!” it’s karina’s voice and she sounds angry — knocks echoing throughout the quietness.

“damn y/n,” mina chuckles through your headset. “who did you piss off?”

“i fucking know you’re in there, don’t be a coward!” the knocks are louder this time and you’re almost certain she put some cracks on that fragile door.

you hesitate for a moment, but then you take the device off and stand up as you heave a sigh. “i’ll be back guys, won’t be long,” you hear a bunch of ‘ooooh’s’ from them before pause.

with hesitation, your expression is blank as you walk towards the door. as soon as the lock is twitched open, you stumble back as karina pushes her way in, her face flushed and her eyes filled with anger.

“why did you not show up? be fucking honest with me,” she demands, her voice sharp. “i told you i wanted you there — did that not matter to you?”

“yeah, well,” you say, your voice colder than you intended, refusing to meet her eyes. “i had a good reason. i really thought i knew you.”

she frowns, clearly confused. “y/n, look at me. what are you talking about?”

“i fucking saw you,” you clench your fists, the bitter words tumbling out before you can stop them. “back there, with soyeon. i heard what she said and then you kissed her.”

her eyes widen, and for a moment, she looks genuinely shocked. “wait, you were there?”

“obviously,” you chuckly bitterly, crossing your arms. “or do you just make out with your ex in front of your toys and rebounds at every gig?”

karina’s face hardens, her anger replaced by a mix of guilt and frustration. “it wasn’t like that.”

“oh, really?” you challenge, looking her in the eye this time. “because it sure looked like that from where i was standing.”

“she came onto me,” she insists, her voice desperate now. “i didn’t want it, y/n. you have to believe me, you mean so much more to me than you think.”

“i don’t have to do anything,” you say, feeling a surge of hurt rise up again. “you asked me to come and then you turned around and kissed her. how am i supposed to believe anything you say?”

she runs a hand through her hair, her frustration evident. “it was a mistake, okay? i was just caught off guard.”

“well, congratulations,” you say, your voice breaking slightly. “you definitely caught me off guard too. had everyone fooled.”

“please, y/n, you have to understand. i didn’t mean for any of this to happen,” she takes a step closer, her expression pleading.

“it’s my fault for believing something. tell me, was there a bet between you and the band too?” you ask, pushing her hand away as she tries to touch you. “how much was i worth?”

“what are you saying?” she asks, her voice almost panicked. “i do like you, way much more than i’d like to admit. and god, there are no fucking bets involved, okay? i fucked up and that’s it.”

“i don’t know if i can do this,” you admit, your chest tightening with the words. “i don’t know how to deal with all of this — specially not when you’re…clearly not on the same level as me.”

karina’s face crumples slightly, but she tries to hold it together. “y/n, i’m sorry. i really am. i don’t know why i did it. i know i’m a mess, but i don’t want to lose you.”

“you might have already,” you say, feeling tears prickling at the corners of your eyes, but refusing to let them fall. “but it was my fault for letting myself believe you could like me.”

“don’t say that,” she whispers, her voice filled with a kind of desperation you’ve never heard before. “i like you, of course i like you.”

you take a deep breath, trying to steady yourself. “i need time, karina. i need to figure out what this means for me.”

she remains quiet for a minute, and you wish you can read what’s going through her mind but her expression softens and she nods slowly. “okay. i’ll give you time. just don’t shut me out completely, please.”

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

the days after the argument are rough, to say the least. you do everything you can to avoid karina —ducking into classrooms when you spot her in the hallway, sitting at different lunch tables, even changing your usual route to class.

the hurt and confusion from that night still linger, like a bruise that refuses to heal. you thought seeing her with soyeon would make things clearer, that it’d help you move on, but instead it’s just left you feeling hollow.

karina tries to reach out, of course. you get texts, missed calls, and the occasional knock on your dorm door that you pointedly ignore. the messages range from desperate pleas to frustrated demands, but you’re too tired to engage, too confused to even know where to begin.

“you can’t avoid her forever, you know,” yunjin says one evening as she flops down next to you on the couch.

“i’m doing a pretty good job of it so far,” you mumble, keeping your eyes fixed on your phone screen, pretending to be engrossed in bitlife.

“seriously, y/n,” she continues, her tone more concerned now. “you need to talk to her. she’s been a wreck. a stupid wreck.”

“oh, so now i’m supposed to feel bad for her?” you snap, the words more bitter than you intended.

she sighs, rubbing her temples. “no, but shutting her out completely isn’t going to fix anything. i know you’re hurt, and you have every right to be, but maybe there’s more to this than you realise.”

“more?” you ask incredulously. “like what? she kissed her ex. right after telling me she wanted me at the gig and leading me on. turns out, i was another rebound!”

“i get it, but people make mistakes. and from what the others told me, karina really does care about you and she’s really trying to show it.”

“well, she’s doing a great job of showing the opposite,” you bite back, leaning back into the couch.

“you need to hear her out,” she insists. “even if it’s just to get closure.”

“yeah, maybe,” you mumbled. “can we not talk about this anymore please?”

the next day, you’re in the middle of a study session in the library when giselle, winter and ningning appear, sliding into the chairs across from you. you glance up, already dreading what’s coming.

“we need to talk,” ningning says, her voice gentle but firm.

you sigh, closing your textbook. “if this is about karina, i don’t want to hear it.”

“too bad,” giselle replies, folding her arms. “because we’re not here for your approval. we’re here to make you face reality.”

you glare at her, but there’s no real anger behind it, just exhaustion. “and what’s reality, exactly?”

“reality is that karina’s a mess without you,” winter speaks, her eyes sincere. “she’s been snapping at everyone, barely talking to us. it’s like she doesn’t know how to function.”

“and you think that’s my problem?” you ask, trying to sound indifferent.

“yes,” giselle answers bluntly. “because whether you want to admit it or not, you care about her.”

“i don’t know if i do anymore,” you confess, your voice small. “look, my world was completely fine before she even knew who i was. i know i’ll be fine without her.”

“you don’t know that,” winter says softly. “and she knows she messed up. she’s trying to fix it, but she can’t if you won’t even talk to her.”

you feel a pang of guilt at their words, but the hurt from seeing karina and soyeon still lingers, like a wound that hasn’t scabbed over yet. “i don’t know if i can forgive her.”

“no one’s saying you have to forgive her right away,” ningnint replies, her tone surprisingly gentle. “talk to her. let her explain.”

“i’ll think about it.”

giselle puts a hand on top of yours, squeezing it gently. “thank you, y/n.”

later that night, you’re alone in your room, staring at your phone. karina’s last text is still on the screen: “please, y/n. just talk to me. i miss you.”

you close your eyes, trying to fight the urge to respond. everything about this situation feels messy and complicated, and you hate it. you’ve never felt this way about anyone before, and you don’t know how to navigate it. the push and pull of your emotions is exhausting and you’re torn between wanting to hear her out and wanting to protect yourself from more hurt.

as you sit there, you hear yunjin’s words echoing in your head: “you need to hear her out, even if it’s just to get closure.”

you let out a frustrated sigh, tossing your phone onto the bed. you know she’s right, and deep down, you know that ignoring karina isn’t going to make the pain go away.

the next morning, you wake up with a sense of determination you haven’t felt in days. you’re not sure if you’re ready to forgive karina, but you know you can’t keep running from her either.

you spend most of the day debating when and where you’ll finally confront karina. your nerves are on edge, your thoughts a jumbled mess of everything you want to say, but also everything you’re afraid to admit.

after your last class, you find yourself making your way toward the music building. it’s the only place you’re sure she will be — probably rehearsing with the others, maybe alone. the whole walk there, your heart hammers in your chest, and you can’t stop fidgeting with the strap of your bag.

you’ve rehearsed a thousand things to say in your head, but as you approach the familiar practice room, your mind goes blank. for a brief moment, you consider turning around and leaving. but before you can talk yourself out of it, the door swings open.

karina stands there, her eyes widening in surprise. for a second, neither of you speaks.

“y/n,” she breathes, her voice barely above a whisper. her eyebrow twitches when she notices your shaking hands. “hi, is everything okay?”

you swallow, trying to keep your voice steady. “can we talk?”

“yeah,” she says immediately, stepping aside to let you in. the room is empty, dimly lit, and filled with the lingering sound of guitar chords from earlier practice.

you both take a seat on the edge of the small stage, the air heavy with tension. karina’s gaze is cautious, like she’s afraid of making the wrong move.

“i know i don’t have the right to ask anything from you,” she starts, her voice low and raw. “but i really need you to hear me out.”

you nod slowly, bracing yourself for whatever she’s about to say.

“that night,” she continues, her eyes filled with regret, “i messed up. i let soyeon get too close, and i didn’t stop her soon enough. but i swear, y/n, it didn’t mean anything. it was a stupid moment of weakness.”

you feel a twinge of hurt, but you try to stay composed. “then why didn’t you pull away sooner?”

she looks down, as if the weight of your question is too much to bear. “i don’t know,” she admits, her voice breaking slightly. “maybe it’s because i was scared of how real things were getting with you. or maybe it’s because i’ve always been too good at sabotaging anything good in my life.”

“so, what am i supposed to do?” you ask, feeling a mix of frustration and vulnerability. “just pretend it never happened?”

“no,” karina says quickly, shaking her head. “i don’t expect that. i want you to know that you’re not just another person to me. you’re not a rebound, and you’re not a distraction.”

you take a deep breath, trying to process her words. “then what am i, karina? because honestly, i have no idea where i stand with you.”

her eyes soften, voice quieter than before. “you’re the first person who’s made me want to try. really try. and that scares the hell out of me, but i don’t want to lose you.”

you sit there for a moment, the words hanging heavy in the air. this whole situation is still new, still confusing, but her sincerity feels more genuine than anything you’ve felt from her before.

“i’m scared too,” you finally admit, your voice barely audible. “i don’t know how to do this, karina. i’ve never liked anyone before. not like this.”

her expression softens further, and she reaches out hesitantly, her hand stopping just short of yours. “we don’t have to figure it all out right now. i just want to be honest with you. and if you’re willing to give me another chance, i promise i’ll do better.”

“okay,” you say quietly, finally meeting her gaze. “one chance, karina. that’s all you get.”

her eyes light up with a mix of relief and something else, something that looks a lot like hope. “i won’t mess it up. i swear.”

you manage a small smile, feeling a tiny weight lift from your chest. “we’ll see.”

the days that follow are tentative, filled with awkward moments and intimate conversations. karina is different now — not softer, exactly, but more attentive. she tries to be less mean in her teasing, though the familiar edge still slips out sometimes.

“nice shoes,” she says one morning as you’re both walking to class. “you finally decide to wear something that doesn’t look like it came from a dumpster?”

you roll your eyes, but there’s no real bite in her words anymore. “you’re still terrible at compliments.”

“working on it,” she admits with a smile.

the rest of the girls notice the shift too, specially yunjin, who seems pleased with the progress.

“told you it’d work out,” she says one evening as you both sit in your dorm, watching another episode of the witcher.

“we’re not exactly there yet,” you warn, but there’s a small smile on your lips.

“well, you’re getting there,” yunjin replies confidently. “and that’s enough for now.”

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

then comes another gig, this time with less anxiety and more anticipation. you’re backstage again, but this time, karina finds you before the show starts.

“you came,” she says, a genuine smile breaking across her face.

“of course i did,” you reply, feeling a warmth spread through your chest. “i said i’d give you a chance, didn’t i?”

her eyes soften, and she reaches out, brushing a strand of hair from your face. “and i’m not wasting it.” as she heads for the stage, she throws a glance over her shoulder. “stay close this time.”

when the music starts, you find yourself smiling, the weight of the past few weeks finally beginning to lift. you don’t have all the answers yet, but for now, just being here feels like enough.

the end.

[vixenihy]

Late Night Guilt

Summary: A few months after the Cuban Missile Crisis, Jack is still facing the stressful aftermath and his survivors guilt from the war certainly isn’t helping either. Just when he feels he’s out of luck, someone he loves dearly is there to help.

Tags/Notes + Pairing: jfk x jackie kennedy, hurt/comfort?, swearing, mentions of past infidelity, antiquated beliefs about emotions, stress, anxiety.

Word Count: 1.1k

A/N: this is my first fic! i’m not super experienced with writing jackie, i fear. but i noticed that there aren’t any jfk x jackie fics so i wanted to change that. i love these two, lol. the indents may be a bit off bc i wrote this on my phone and used the spacebar as substitutes for indents… sorry lol. the banner was made by me, and the border below belongs to @/menschenopfer !

God Damnit…

Jack lets out a quiet groan of frustration, biting his cheek and hoping that the interviewer didn’t hear him. He’d forgotten to take the medication for managing his nerves. Not like he can remember what it’s called, though. There's too many names to even begin to remember what the Hell it’s called.

The past few months have been nothing but stress; Paper after paper and interview after interview. It’s a total mess, and it’s his fault. The Cuban Missile Crisis was the closest the world came to ending; but who started this beginning to the end? Well, Jack blames no one but himself. He can barely resist the urge to tap his teeth with his fingers in front of the camera focusing on his face.

“Mr. President, after the close call with the Soviet Union and Cuba, a handful of Americans are curious about your story that led to you earning your Purple Heart. We know there is a movie coming out later this year, but would you care to give a little of your own personal perspective?” The interviewer asks. Jack clenches his jaw and tightly interlocks his fingers as a heavy pang hits his heart. The last thing Jack wants to be reminded of is the people who he failed to protect, the two people who died because of him. He can feel the guilt eating away at him as he speaks, his voice just as calm as his face.

“Oh, there isn’t much to say. They sank my boat, and we were stranded for a while. Then with the help of some of the natives, the Navy came and saved me and my crew.” Jack explains calmly, ignoring the burning hot fire, hours of pulling men to the boat, screaming the names of the men he’d lost till daybreak. The swimming, vomiting, starvation, the close calls with death, and the terrible guilt he faces to this day. He left out all of it. No one will know how he felt that day, because Kennedys don’t show how they feel. A real Kennedy never cracks.

Jack snaps back to reality just as the interviewer finishes scribbling his notes.

“Thank you Mr. President.”

—————

“Bunny, it’s okay if you want to talk…You know I'm here for you, don’t you?” Jackie presses as she helps to massage her husband's back. Usually, she wouldn’t press too much into his day and his issues as she believed it wasn’t right to bring up the stress of the day right after it had ended, but Jackie noticed how stressed he looked and how upset he seemed to be when she saw a glimpse of him when he was alone. It worries her. And though he had hurt her in the past with his philandering behavior, she knows why he acts the way he does and how he’s doing his best to change. So, she decides to focus on the future rather than the past.

“I know, Jackie…But I'm fine. It’s just that work is stressful. That’s all.” Jack sighs, laying his head in his arms and closing his eyes as Jackie helps to work the stress out of his body. He wishes that he could tell Jackie all about his day and vent his frustrations, but he finds himself biting his tongue. Men don’t talk about their feelings, especially not a Kennedy man. He can hear his parents chastising him in the back of his mind for even having such a thought. So, he just decides to let it go and switch the conversation.

“Thank you for helping me with my back, Kid…It’s been killing me for the past month. I think picking up Caroline at Christmas really aggravated it.” He continues, turning his head back ever so slightly to look at her. Jackie looks so beautiful with the dim lamp shining behind her, illuminating her figure like an angel. He doesn’t deserve her, how did he get so lucky?

“It’s alright, Jack. You certainly made her day.” She whispers with a chuckle, glancing into his faded green eyes and watching them spark with life, the Jack Kennedy she knows and loves seems to finally come to life.

——

The crackle of fire and the smell of oil taints the air as Jack slowly opens his eyes, groaning in agony as his back spasms. He goes to grab the nightstand, but only finds a cold metal surface beneath his hand. He stumbles as he pulls himself into a standing position, opening his eyes at last. His heart drops as he realizes where he is. He’s over a thousand miles from home, he’s in the same place he fought like Hell to escape from, he’s back.

The South Pacific.

Following the same routine he’s done a hundred times before, Jack leaps off the side of the creaking bow and swims out towards the voices of his crew. They scream and cry out for their skipper and their mothers, a haunting sound he’s listened to too many times before. Just as he’s about to reach one man, he sees a head disappear below the waves. Gasping with fear, Jack dives below the waves and claws his way downwards, the darkness of the sea making it impossible for Jack to see the face of the man he’s trying to save. But just as he reaches out, he slips out of his reach. And he helplessly watches the figure disappear into the dark abyss.

Jack awakes with a start, jolting to find himself back in the luxurious bedroom he’s lived in for the past few years. He sits up gently, bringing himself back to the present with a deep sigh. Attempting to alleviate his back pain, Jack brings his knees to his chest and lies his head on his arms. A tightness settles in his heart as guilt festers in his mind. He forces back a few tears as he remembers one of the hardest experiences of his life. Just before any tears begin to break through, he feels a hand on his shoulder.

“Jack?” Jackie asks groggily, confused to see her husband awake so late. “What’s the matter, Bunny?” Wiping his eyes with his hand, Jack lies down onto his back.

“It’s nothing, Jackie. Just a bad dream is all…” He sighs, turning over onto his side.

“Go back to sleep, Kid. It’s alright..” Jack mutters. But before he can allow himself to drift off, he feels Jackie's arms wrap around him and hold him close to her body. At first, he seems uncomfortable by the touch his wife is giving him. It feels so foreign and uncomfortable. But as the seconds pass, he finds himself warming up to it…

“Maybe we can get away to Hyannis Port on Saturday. No press, no people, no work…Just us. It’ll be cold, but I think you need a break.” Jackie suggests, placing a kiss on her husband's neck and rubbing her thumb over his hand.

“I love you, Bunny.” She sighs, cuddling closer to Jack.

“I love you too, Jackie.” Jack smiles, shutting his eyes and slowly drifting off to sleep.

[elektrantchios]

Could you do a sejanus x reader fic where the reader hears of his death and immediately accuses snow of killing the love of her life

goodbye, goodbye, goodbye | s.p

pairing: sejanus x gn!reader

warnings: death, angst, alcohol use, a little fluff, fighting and swearing (this is gonna be a rough one)

word count: 880

a/n: Thank you so much for the request! this might be the saddest thing I’ve ever wrote, definitely cried writing this

MAIN MASTERLIST | REQUEST OPEN

“And this is Coryo, my best friend” Sejanus held one hand on your waist and clasped his friend's shoulder with the other. When he first brought up meeting his friend you were nervous. Falling in love with a peacekeeper was never the plan, becoming friends with another wasn’t either.

But Sejanus always spoke of Coriolanus with such fondness, that his friend was more like a brother and had saved him multiple times. And for that you figured you owned him a hello. Besides, he was involved with the local singers so you knew your secret was safe.

“So this is the person who has you so bewitched” Coriolanus smiled, it should have been charming, but the smile hadn’t touched his eyes. 

You returned the smile, pressing closer into Sejanus, “so this is the person who has saved you so many times”. Sejanus laughed and smiled at the two people he held close in 12. 

Your knees hit the floor, hidden deep into the crowd, you were saved from peacekeepers. In the tree the jabberjays carried his last words in the air.

“Ma! Ma! Ma! Ma! Ma!”

The plan, the life you had planned together was gone. Forever loyal he hadn’t mentioned your name or you’d be hanging there with him. 

Someone behind helped you stand, muttering a thank you, you look towards the peacekeepers searching for him, coryo, Coriolanus, best friend more like a brother. 

His blue eyes found you quickly, guilt. Guilt was etched into his eyes. The grief weighed you down, it felt like your heart had been replaced by lead.

Sejanus hands were on your hips, his lips were pressed into your throat. He should be on patrol but had stuck away to meet you. 

The past days his mood had increased, things were falling into place and you’d be leaving district 12 behind once and for all. 

“Will you be at the show tonight?” He asked in between kisses. 

“Can’t” you sighed, “my aunt caught me seeking out last week and has started locking the door”.

He looked worried, “how will you get out when it’s time”

You smiled kissing his frown away, “I’ve been saving up the white liquor, she’ll be out before the sun”

You had fallen fast for him, you loved his need to help, the fire that burned in him. You could feel it when you stood close to him, feel it in his kiss. 

“I have to go,” he said, not move.

“I’ll see you soon” you kissed him one more time and watched him go. 

With a stomach full of white liquor you tripped through the streets. Sejanus had shared Coriolanus patrol times once, a rush of pain hit you each time you remembered him. Even the liquor didn’t dull the pain. 

He wouldn’t get away with what he did, Coriolanus was the only person Sejanus was going to tell, he didn’t trust anyone else. The confess was played before he was taken from you, you saw it dawn on him.

Coriolanus handed the only person you had ever loved over to the capitol. You didn’t know how he did it but he did. Maybe doing this you’d join Sejanus soon, the rush for pain felt welcome, yes you would join him again. 

“Coriolanus” you yelled, the words slurring. He was alone and when he saw you he stopped. He tried saying your name and held his hand up. You cried out and threw up against the wall.

“I know what you did!” You spoke through gritted teeth. 

He said your name again so calm it only made you mad. “You've been drinking”, he pushed you away.

“His blood is on your hands” you told him, finding your footing. 

“Go home”

“No” you cried pushing him again. You saw annoyance in his eyes,  you saw yourself a sobbing drunk mess and you saw assurance. 

He was save.

In the eyes of everyone Sejanus was a traitor and a rebel, and no one spared any tears for traitors and rebels unless they wanted to join them. 

You swallowed, feeling oddly sober.

“You’ll pay for what you did, I don’t know how or when but you will and I will smile as you die”.

You walked away from him, let him tell his friends, let them come and take you away. You wouldn’t be found, the supplies were where you left them, enough to last a few days or more if you were carefully. 

You would keep to the plan and head north to find what Sejanus had dreamed of. You would do whatever it took to bring Coriolanus Snow down and then you would find peace with Sejanus and his fire would warm you for the rest of eternity.

The sun hadn’t risen yet but it was warm, usually the heat was unbearable. But with the grass wet with morningdew and the breeze on your skin it was perfect. 

Beside you Sejanus slept, you’d have to wake him soon so he’d be back in time for morning checks. You’d wish the moment would never end, that you could watch him sleep forever. 

“You’re watching me sleep” he laughed, eyes still closed. 

“I can’t help it” you laughed too, lying back beside him, curling into him. “I can’t wait to spend the rest of our lives together”.

You felt him kiss your forehead.  “And beyond that”

[dystopicjumpsuit]

The Night Before Someday

A/N: Happy (slightly belated) birthday to my dearest @wings-and-beskar! I wrote you some smut. 💛

Pairing: Cody x Reader (GN)

Rating: M - Minors DNI

Wordcount: 1.6K

Warnings and tags: fluff; roofies mentioned in passing; somebody other than Cody tries to hit on you; SMUT; oral sex; teasing; minor dom/sub dynamics; orgasm delay; established secret/forbidden relationship.

Summary: Did you read “Someday” and feel a burning desire to know what happened the night before? Look no further! This is that fic.

Suggested listening:

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79’s was hot, loud, and crowded. The heavy beat of dance music pulsated through the dense, smoky air of the club. The 212th was on shore leave, and you could swear that all 42,000 troopers in the battalion were currently either in line for the bar or grinding on the dance floor. You weren’t the only nat-born officer in the place, but you still stood out in the sea of clones, and every so often a drunken trooper would hoot your name or cheer raucously as you passed.

The energy was frenetic. To tell the truth, dance clubs weren’t really your usual scene, but it was the first night of leave, and it was expected that the senior command staff would put in an appearance. It wasn’t so bad, though; the troopers were rowdy but unfailingly respectful, and as you headed back to your table after braving the line at the bar for a refill, one of your very favorite trios found you and pulled you inexorably into their orbit. 

“Didn’t think we’d see you here tonight, Major,” Wooley said as he slung his arm over your shoulders with an easy (if somewhat wobbly) smile.

“Why not?” you asked.

“Figured you’d have somethin’ better to do than hang out with the same faces you see all day every day,” Waxer grinned.

“What could possibly be better than this?” you asked, gesturing at the sticky, sweaty crowd.

“Probably just about any nat-born cantina,” Boil replied.

“Oh, we have more than our share of shitty dives,” you replied. “Plus my chances of having my drink roofied are probably lower here than just about any bar in the galaxy.”

“‘Specially with us watching your back,” Wooley said. He was slurring his words a bit, and his arm was ridiculously heavy on your shoulders, but you had a feeling his night was just getting started.

“Surprised you aren’t at the table with the rest of the command staff,” Boil remarked.

“I was on my way back when you waylaid me,” you laughed.

“Eh, we’re more fun anyway,” Waxer said with a charming smile.

Privately, you couldn’t help but agree, not that you would ever, ever say it out loud. Waxer, Boil, and Wooley didn’t have to worry about presenting a dignified facade the way the senior officers—including you—did. 

You drew a breath to reply, and suddenly, a Mirialan tripped and stumbled into you. She righted herself quickly, apologizing profusely in an Outer-Rim trade language. You replied fluently in the same language, reassuring her and asking if she was all right. She nodded and excused herself quickly, and as she left, you checked to make sure she hadn’t swiped your credits.

“Kriff, it’s hot when you do that,” Wooley said, leaning a little closer to your ear.

“What, check to make sure someone didn’t rip me off?” you laughed.

“No, when you speak Sy Bisti or whatever that was,” he replied.

“Meese Caulf,” you said.

“I don’t know how the commander keeps his hands off you when you’re translating for him,” Wooley said a little over-loudly.

Yeah, he’s definitely had enough to drink, you thought.

If you were honest, you liked Wooley just fine. He was sweet and funny, he had great hair, and he looked like… well… a clone trooper. Enough said. You might have considered reciprocating his interest if it weren’t for two very important factors. One: you outranked him by several degrees, and you’d have felt weird about it even if it weren’t officially forbidden for you to fraternize with him. Ironic, all things considered. 

Two—

“Because I don’t fancy a court martial, and I suspect the major doesn’t either, so I’d suggest you keep your hands to yourself,” a voice said from just behind you.

His tone was mild, but all four of you snapped to attention instinctively, and Wooley dropped his arm and put several inches in between himself and you for good measure.

“Yes, sir! Sorry, sir,” Wooley said sheepishly.

“I’m not the one you should be apologizing to,” Commander Cody replied. 

“Er, sorry, Major,” Wooley mumbled.

You kept a perfectly straight face as you reassured Wooley, then extricated yourself from the group and made your way back to the command staff’s table with Cody. 

Once you were out of earshot, you asked, “Court martial? Don’t you think that’s a bit excessive?”

Cody arched a quizzical brow. “Just looking out for my officers.”

“Careful, Commander. People might start thinking you have an interest beyond strict professionalism.”

Under the guise of steering you around a group of rowdy, drunken troopers, Cody rested his hand on your lower back, and you felt his fingertips graze your bare skin, just beneath the hem of your shirt.

“We can’t have that,” he murmured. He leaned in slightly to whisper in your ear. “I wish I could dance with you.”

You suppressed a smile. “How much longer do we need to keep up this charade before we sneak back to my flat?”

“One more drink ought to do it,” he said. 

You glanced down at your cocktail. “Mine’s already half gone. I’ll leave first so nobody suspects.”

“You know, Wooley was right about one thing. You are hot as kriff.” He pressed his fingers into your back gently, then withdrew his hand as you approached the table where the rest of the senior command waited. “Door code still the same?”

“Always.”

You were in the kitchen chugging the galaxy’s largest glass of water when you heard the front door swish open. By the time it closed again, you were already in Cody's arms. As your lips met, he picked you up and spun you around until you shrieked with laughter. When he set you down, he held you steady until you regained your footing, then slid his hand up your back to hold your head as he leaned his forehead against yours and took a deep, slow breath in and out.

“Hello,” you smiled.

“Hello,” he replied. “I missed you.”

“It's only been an hour,” you pointed out.

“An eternity.” He kissed along your jaw until he reached your ear, whispering, “A lifetime.”

You shivered as his breath tingled across your skin. “Welcome home.”

A quiet rumble of pleasure sounded in his chest at your words. “Let's go to bed.”

“Tired?” you teased.

He slid his hands down your body to grip your ass, pulling you hard against him. “Not even a little bit.”

That’s a kriffing lie, you thought, knowing exactly how busy and exhausted he was, but you weren’t about to call him on it when his lips tasted so perfect, and his body felt so strong and solid and warm, and his hands roamed over you, touching and teasing and exploring. You didn’t even notice that he was expertly guiding you backward through your flat until he leaned you slowly back onto your mattress.

“Excellent diversionary tactics, Commander,” you said as he kissed down your throat and sternum, deftly unbuttoning your top as he progressed.

“Mm,” he murmured, unzipping your trousers and sliding them down your hips. “That’s Marshal Commander.”

Your laugh turned into a gasp as he tugged your underwear out of the way and his tongue caressed your skin. 

“Fuck, you’re so gorgeous,” he whispered, gazing up your body as he stroked his fingers over you softly. He trailed kisses down your pelvis and swirled his tongue over your sex. “I could never taste you enough.”

Oh, gods, but he tried. He devoured you with all the skill and passion of a man deprived too long. He took his time, luxuriating in your smooth skin, your warmth, your scent, your taste, your quiet moans, your desperate whimpers, your frantic squirming beneath his lovely mouth. 

Ever the strategist, he used every tool at his disposal in his relentless pursuit of your pleasure: fingers, tongue, lips—even his teeth: grazing them gently across your tender flesh, then smoothing his tongue over you in soft, comforting strokes. He drew you closer and closer to your climax, refusing to hurry, even when your whimpers and moans gave way to pleading and sobbing as heat pulsed relentlessly through your veins, so close: so close, and yet just out of reach. 

And then—he stopped.

You nearly screamed in frustration. “Damn it, Cody!”

“Manners,” he chided.

You growled. “I am going to get revenge for this.”

“I have no doubt,” he replied, kissing you softly and then brushing his thumb over his swollen lips. “Now ask nicely.”

You gritted your teeth and took a deep breath. “Please, sir, will you let me come?”

He gave you a devilish smile and lowered his head back down to your body, devouring you with renewed enthusiasm, and within seconds, he brought you to the precipice.

“Please, please, please,” you chanted.

He groaned, a deep, gravelly sound that vibrated on your skin, and with a dexterous movement of his fingers, he pushed you over the edge. You let out a hoarse cry, for once not concerned about keeping your volume down, as your hips thrust up off the mattress. He pressed you back down as he kept going, eagerly taking everything you had to give, until you were twitching and writhing helplessly beneath him.

At last, when he’d wrung every last drop of pleasure from your body, you fell back, breathing hard as you slowly relaxed against the pillows. He looked up at you with a self-satisfied grin, and you narrowed your eyes vindictively. Wrapping your legs around him, you flipped both of you over so he was lying on his back beneath you, gazing up at you with blatant adoration.

“My turn,” you murmured.

Didn't read "Someday"? It's here, and it's fluffy as hell!

[dokries]

over and over

pairing: xu minghao (the8) x gender neutral reader

genre: angst, time loop, past lovers

word count: 457

warnings: implied (previous) main character death, distorted text for effect

author note: i have no idea why i wrote this, but here it is ! it’s so funny cause my fics are either pure fluff or angst; there’s no in between (yet). lots of love <3

masterlist

he’s back here again—the cherry blossom petals falling around him, circling around his body and landing on the top of your head, just like they had done in the past. how many times has it even been? he lost count after the thirtieth time he had been back here. 

it was a sick joke being played on him; having the chance to meet you once again, back when everything was fine, and you were…still here. 

the first time he came back, he could do nothing but stare at you, mouth wide and teary eyes. 

“what’s wrong, m̵̿ͅi̸̩͆ň̴̻ϱ̶͍̓ʜ̶͉̌ɒ̴̲̍ö̷͕́?” you had asked him. 

he doesn’t remember his name anymore—it’s been too long.

“nothing…i just couldn’t wait to see you,” he had replied, smiling sincerely for the first time since you were gone. the weight of all the pain and grief had dissipated as soon as he saw you smile back at him. 

the second time he opened his eyes and was staring at the pavement outside of the cafe that was across from the park you both were supposed to meet at, he was confused. he had just seen you, hadn’t he? why was he back? 

it was easier to deal with the confusion the third time, and the fourth and the fifth and the ones that came after; he shoved it all in the back of his head, trying to forget…but he could never forget any detail about you. 

he stares at you now, tired of all the times he’s been by the same streetlamp. perhaps the reason he’s always brought back to this moment is because he has an important choice to make, and he never ends up making the right one. 

this time, he doesn’t approach you. 

this time, he simply hides behind the pretty cherry blossom trees, and watches your expression. his phone buzzes as you stare at your own frustrated, and you sigh when he doesn’t respond. 

eventually, you start to leave, and he can see the moment the world shifts. 

you pause when someone he’s never seen bumps into you and apologizes, and he swears he can see a spark between the two of you. petals continue to fall around you both, the wind swirling them around in a protective circle—one he should’ve never entered in the first place. 

his heart burns as he thinks, choosing to look at the cloudy sky instead of the picture perfect scene unfolding in front of him. so this is what fate had in mind for me all this time.

he was never the love you needed, he thinks bitterly to himself, tearing his eyes away from the sky above him as he walks off without glancing back.

he’s only the one who got in the way. 

[skellymom]

"Bring Me To My Knees" PART 2

Crosshair/Hunter x Reader Non Gendered SMUT++

Dividers by the talented: @saradika and @4ngelic-wh1spers

Background: Reader and Crosshair are separated from the group during the rescue of Omega and Tech from Mt Tantiss. Two broken people trying to get by in the galaxy. Then two broken people finally dealing with what happened to their group.

Word Count: 2.3K

Warning: Star Wars Canon violence, angst, death of major character, sadness, crying, guilt, permanent injury, stuff blowing up, swearing, kissing, intercourse, heavy petting, bite kind, blood kink, pain kink, spank kink, smutty/lemony content, lovers triangle with Hunter and Crosshair.

FOR CLARITY, HUNTER FLASHBACK SMUT SCENE IN CHAPTER 1. THE CROSSHAIR SMUT SCENE IS IN THIS CHAPTER 2. Broke this up in 2 chapters because I just couldn't stop writing...and 4K might be too much for one sitting.

I purposely wrote the reader in this fic to be of no specific gender. Tried to carefully craft the sexual scenes to accommodate either gender/non gendered/trans/genderfluid/non-binary. Everyone has hills, valleys, sexual organs, nipples, and erogenous zones. I wrote them into the story, but it's up to you dear reader to put your imagination to work. Hope I have done a good enough job that you can enjoy yourself with Hunter and Crosshair without breaking immersion!

To read Chapter 1:

https://www.tumblr.com/skellymom/744267915687264256/bring-me-to-my-knees-part-1?source=share

The intel proved to be correct. You and Crosshair traveled to an uncharted planet well past the Outer Rim. A quiet unassuming place to start planning a burgeoning Rebellion. 

He piloted. As your ship entered planetary airspace several Rebel ships swooped in as escorts. The Rebel base radioed in to confirm your status. 

“Crosshair, Clone Force 99 and Y/N, civilian. We are Rebel sympathizers wanting to join the Rebel cause and find our lost family and squad members.” You replied. 

“Authenticating data. Hold your position.” 

Silence as you and Crosshair waited on bated breath. 

“You are clear to land. We will perform a customary inspection of your transport. Then check your gunnery and weapons at the docking station armory.” 

“They’ll be taking my rifle OVER my DEAD body.” Crosshair snarked. 

“Toothpick?” 

“Hhm?” 

“It’s your gun, NOT your dick. Let them do their job.” 

He sighed and shook his head. 

Word must have spread fast. No sooner did you land than Omega was out the bay door jumping up and down in excitement. 

Crosshair barely got the gangplank down on the ship. You jumped over the stairs and landed on your hands and knees. Sprung up and ran to her. 

Omega knocked you over with her embrace. You were both laying there crying. She had grown two heads taller and much stronger too. 

Rebel soldiers had come out to check the validity of your claims. They stood aside seeing at least one of their residents recognize you. They had witnessed MANY reunions just like this as people were finding their way to the planet.  

There was more: Wrecker wasn’t far behind. He scooped you both up and hugged you fiercely. 

“AWWW...SO GLAD YOU’RE HERE! MISSED YA HORRIBLY!!!” Wiping away tears. 

Echo approached with Phee. 

Wrecker let you go, and you embraced them both with each arm. 

“Phee...what happened???” Her beautiful hair was gone. Head covered and tied fashionably with a scarf. Burn scar down one side of her face. You noticed one hand had scars as well. 

She shot Echo a strange look, then shrugged and perked up. “It’s growing back. Getting bacta therapy for the scars.” 

“Tech? Hunter? Are they here?” 

Echo answered “Come inside. We’ll get you settled.” 

“Wait, I didn’t come alone.” 

You turned towards your ship. Crosshair was standing at the bottom of the stairs. 

Omega gave him a bear hug. He had allowed her that. Wrecker stood a few feet away watching them.  

Echo took your hand. “Let’s give them some time to catch up.” 

He and Phee led you inside the base past bustling personnel.  

“Wait...I didn’t check my blaster...” 

“That’s ok” Phee patted your shoulder. “We vouched for you. Crosshair though...” 

You approached an open medical station with bacta tanks lined up...recognizing... 

“TECH!” 

He bobbed merrily in the solution, waving at your arrival. 

You stopped to see he was missing both legs...just like Echo. There were scars all over his body, some weren’t present during his rescue. Tech saw your face and immediately started signing in Basic. 

It is no major loss. I will be fine. Only 20 more rotations within this tank, then I shall be fitted for my prosthetics...please...don’t cry. 

Things were starting to come together...Phee’s hair loss and burns...the Marauder being hit... 

“WHERE’S HUNTER???” You yelled it in a panic. 

Echo stepped in and took your hand. “Y/N... he...” The look on his face told you this wouldn’t be good news. Echo’s eyes registered the scarf draped around your neck. 

There was a commotion behind you at the entrance of the base. Crosshair’s voice. Arguing with two Rebel troopers over his lack of compliance regarding check-in. 

“Sir! We need you to...” 

“NOT NOW! Can’t you see MY PARTNER is in distress!!!” 

The trooper grabbed his arm. Crosshair immediately disarmed the man and put his ass on the floor. Then handed the troopers gun to HIS partner sneering, “I said FUCK OFF!” 

The second trooper took the gun and commed for backup. 

Crosshair stalked over gently putting his hands on your shoulders. Fixing Echo with his baleful stare. “Where’s Hunter?” 

Echo fixed you both with his amber eyes. He sighed; his expression was so sad. “I’ll take you to him.” 

Tech tapped on the tank to get Crosshair’s attention. Cross glanced over shocked. He hadn’t recognized who was in there. Then he noticed Tech’s condition. 

I’ll be ok brother. He signed.  

Tech put his hand up against the glass. Crosshair placed his on the other side against Tech’s. 

The trooper’s backup arrived and trained their blasters on Crosshair. He turned and eyed them menacingly. Then dropped his hands from your shoulders, one of which you grabbed. 

“Don’t start any shit, Toothpick. Please, this isn’t the time.” Squeezing his hand firmly. 

He squeezed your hand back and stood down. 

“Break it up Trooper. These are friendlies.” Captain Rex emerged from the back of the squad. 

“But sir, he assaulted one of our Rebel staff. And he refused to check his rifle.” Pointing to Stormpuncher mounted on Crosshair’s back. 

“I’ll handle it, Trooper. You are all dismissed.” 

The Rebel squad eyed Crosshair uneasily as they filed away from the scene. 

“Good to see you both alive and well.” Rex smiled genuinely. “But I’ll let Echo catch you up on everything.” He nodded to Echo and stepped away. 

At this point Wrecker and Omega joined the group. 

“Follow me.” Echo instructed. 

You glanced at Tech as the group started to walk away. He smiled wistfully.  

“I got them Brown Eyes.” She winked at Tech, and he winked back. But he still looked concerned. 

Phee put her arm around your shoulder and walked with you. Crosshair followed at your other side silently. 

The group filed through the whole facility: past logistics, maintenance, troop training, mess, quarters, a small prison area (mostly empty), daycare, pet kennel, a few non-descript departments, and finally to the back end of the facility. The group approached heavy double doors. 

There was a sense of dread in your chest. Everyone was quiet. Echo looked heartbroken as he swiped his key card over the lock mechanism.  

The doors opened to the outside. A HUGE garden stretching for over a mile...planted with the bodies of those fallen from the Empire. Headstones, holoshrines, helmets, and all manner of tributes marked each plot. Adults, children, military, civilians, even service animals. Droids who could not be repaired were erected as tribute statuary with holoplaques proclaiming their sacrifice. 

Hunter was there. Laid to rest several rows down from the entrance. 

The realization hit you like a ton of bricks. 

“This isn’t real...” Shaking your head but staring straight ahead at Hunter’s helmet propped up on his plot. “NO... can’t.” Tears running down your face. 

Phee rubbed your back. “I’m SO sorry.” She was crying too. “Broody saved my life. I almost burned to death.” She pulled off the scarf to reveal the severity of her injuries. “I’m the reason he’s here.” 

Wrecker piped up “Noo, that’s not true. He would’ve done it for anyone on that ship.” He hugged Phee. 

Survivor’s guilt. Your heart went out to her.    

Crosshair took your hand and silently encouraged you to step down into the memorial and go to Hunter’s plot. You inhaled and stepped down...then your legs gave out. Crosshair grabbed your right shoulder. Echo ran over and supported your left. 

They led you to the plot. Wrecker, Phee, and Omega stayed behind. 

Soft grass was planted for whomever wished to sit and visit. Hunter’s helmet was surrounded by vivid red Poppies in full bloom. Echo seated you upon the grass. Crosshair kneeling beside you.  

“Can I do anything at all for you both.” He inquired. 

Silence. 

“Uh...I’ll give you some privacy.” 

“Echo?” 

“Yeah?” 

You swept him up in a hug again. “Thank you...for everything.” Tears returning. 

“Oh, of course.” He embraced you back. Holding on for some time. 

Echo patted your back and cleared his throat. He let go and wiped a tear from his face. 

Then he was gone.   

Crosshair sat stone faced staring at Hunter’s helmet bereft of emotion. It was the best he could do at this moment. 

You took off the red scarf, slipped it over Hunter’s helmet, and arranged it as if draped off Hunter’s own shoulders. 

Like he was sitting right in front of you with his bucket on... 

A sudden loud sob escaped. Each exhalation became louder until it ended in a scream. Your face red and pressed into the warm grass. Watering Hunter’s grave with your tears. Freeing the emotion out of the pit of your being. Screaming, sobbing until empty, finally collapsing from exhaustion. 

The afternoon progressed and the sun started to dip down towards the horizon. 

“Hey” Crosshair nudged you from disassociation. “Let’s go.” 

Numb, you let him haul you up under the shoulders. Standing, your vision went snowy and black.   

Crosshair must have carried you to the ship. The next few days were a blur, you slept through most of it. He hovered, fixing ration soup and just about threatening to force feed you. Trading whatever he could for black market sweets just to get ANYTHING into your belly. You barely remember Echo, Wrecker, Omega, or Phee visiting. Or AZI monitoring your vitals, reporting them well within range, that it was “only” grief and would eventually pass. 

Finally, after days in your bunk Crosshair had enough. 

“Soup!” He poked you awake. 

“Whaa?” Weakly turning over, burrowing under the blanket. 

“Get up. You STINK!” 

“Fuck off Crossy...” 

“Get up, or I’m throwing you INTO the refresher. Clothes and all.” 

You ignored him. 

Crosshair reached under the blanket and yanked you up. You caterwauled hurling swears, too weak to fight. But you were strong enough to hold on. 

He opened the refresher door and attempted to set you down. You stuck to him like shit on a Bantha’s behind. It turned into a wrestling match, both of you swearing at one another. One hand pried off him, then another would latch on, finally tearing his shirt to shreds. 

Cross gave up and flipped on the water soaking you both. The cold spray only made you hold on tighter, pressing against his chest for warmth. He gave up, sighed, adjusted the temp to warm. 

“Will you wash my hair?” 

Sighing again. “Yes.” 

You let go and turned your back to him. Crosshair lathered up his hands. 

“Wait.” You pulled the soaked T-shirt over your head and threw it in the corner of the shower. Now you're only clad in underwear. “Ok.” 

He applied the shampoo and did one helluva job massaging it into your hair. You smiled and groaned at the sensation. He finished by twisting the hair into a soapy point atop your head. 

“Will you wash my back and neck?” 

Heavy sigh. But he did. His hands were amazing. 

“Toothpick, will...” 

“I’m NOT washing your dirty ass...or anything else. You can reach.” Cross rinsed his hands and exited the refresher, leaving you to finish the job. 

You finally exited the shower feeling and smelling much better. 

Clean towels and comfy clothing were waiting for you. A non-descript box sat atop them.  

Dried, dressed, brushed your hair and nasty teeth. Then opened the box. The beautiful black and silver scarf from Mel and Marv’s stand. Toothpick paid attention...and had held on to it the whole time. 

You put it on and made your way back through the darkened ship. 

Crosshair was waiting, sitting on a blanket spread out on the floor. There was a multitude of fresh food and rations upon it. Also, a lit candle in the middle. The kind he would razz you about that “smelled like flowers and shit.” 

You smiled. “Is this a date?” Attempting some levity. 

“Sit your ass down and eat.” 

“Thank you.” Caressing the scarf around your neck. 

“For what?” He played dumb. You could see he noticed. 

“Everything. Being there for...” You couldn’t bear to speak it. “Taking care of me, this food...” 

“Can’t have you dying on me. Would have smelled worse than you already did.” 

“Oh...and that shower brawl...” looking up from your food. “THAT was certainly SOMETHING.” 

Crosshair grinned. “You owe me a new shirt.” 

“Do I, now? Well, don’t wear clothes in the refresher when you decide to throw me in.” 

He cocked an eyebrow while biting into a ration bar. 

“Then when I grab something, it’ll be foreplay.” 

Crosshair choked on his food. 

You stuffed yourself full. Satisfied, thanking Crosshair again (who rolled his eyes), and wandered back to your bunk. 

He had changed the bedding out while you were in the refresher. It was clean and the blanket turned over, inviting you to slide in. 

It felt wonderful burrowing into the clean sheets. 

But sleep was elusive tonight. 

The grief was still too much for you both. 

Two people alone on a dark, silent ship. The distance between you palpable. 

“Are...you awake?” he furtively asked with hushed tones in the dark. 

“Umhmm.” Intrigued as to why he asked. Sitting up and sliding your legs off to the side of the bunk. 

Silence. 

You sat there in the dark waiting for an answer. 

More silence... 

(You like a song to go with the following scene? Please check it out. Smutty, but emotional)

...then Crosshairs hand gently smoothing away the hair from your temple. 

You immediately embraced him tightly. 

He falters for just a beat.  Body frozen for what seems like an eternity.  Would this scare him away? 

Then you feel his arms encircle you, lips upon your cheek...kissing down to your lips. 

Unable to hold back any further, you turn your head to meet his lips to yours. 

Mouths opening to breathe into the well of one another.  Sliding upon each other passionately.  Breaths furiously taken in between long heated kisses. 

Then parting quickly to pull the clothing from each other's body.  Almost ripping the cloth away from bare skin.  Occasional moans of longing for skin-to-skin contact. 

Finally free of constraints, he stops to visually take you in... 

...he’s waited SO LONG for this moment. Couldn’t help admiring your strength while rescuing him on Tantiss...but finding out you bonded romantically to Hunter... 

“I... I’m afraid...” Terror and shame on his face. 

This shocks you to hear such words fall from his lips. He’s so VULNERABLE...kneeling next to you proclaiming his feelings. 

You reach out and stroke the side of his face, then firmly grip this chin. “So am I. But it’s just the two of us now.” 

You both stare into the lonely abyss of each other's eyes. 

“And I CAN’T STAND being alone.” 

“Then you WON’T be...EVER” He reaches out across the space between, pulling you to his body. His heat, his need. 

You have your own need, your heat blazes HOT with his deep kisses. Tongues intertwining.  

Then he pulls away to bury his face next to your ear whispering EVERY DIRTY THING he’s going to do to you while nuzzling and nipping your ear. Rubbing his hard cock along your shin, sliding along the wetness it leaves behind. 

You moan loudly...” Oh...fuck me...” 

“Mhmm...” trailing his tongue down your neck. His hands caressing the inside of your thighs. Stopping just short of your sex. Teasing his fingers around it...teasing you into fever pitch. 

Your hand on his shoulder digs your nails into his flesh. He moans in ecstasy from the pain. Trailing down your chest to nip and lick at your nipples. Crosshair stares up adoringly with half hooded eyes. 

His hand casually brushes your sex and trails away. 

Smiling while he teases. 

You grip the edge of the bunk, bracing your feet on the floor, and buck out your hips in the air, gasping, baring your teeth. 

Then he playfully but firmly slaps your sex. 

It pisses you off while turning you on at the same time. The tension building. 

His cock is SO slippery against your leg. The breath coming from him labored and shaky. Tracing your thighs just so closely to where you want to be stimulated, then away again. 

“FUCK ME!” You growl deeply through your teeth.  Something FERAL awakening in you. Shaking, sweating, digging harder into his shoulder. It starts to bleed, and his eyes roll back in his head.  

His facial expression turns intense. He slaps your sex again. You moan louder, then growl again. 

The teasing. It’s driving you INSANE. 

He knows you’re about to lose it... 

Crosshair stops kissing your chest, put’s his snarky, sexy, come-fuck-me-face up to your ear...  

“...Mmm...bite me...” 

Back somewhere in your sexually addled lizard brain registers this could be literal instead of figurative. 

And he slaps you...ONE MORE TIME... 

Without thinking you sink your teeth into his other shoulder. Blood seeping into your mouth. 

Crosshair screams out in fevered sexual ecstasy...frotting his weeping cock furiously against your leg. 

His slapping hand comes back fully on your sex, furiously stimulating... 

...kneading... 

...filling up your intimate spaces... 

...sliding.... 

...you buck your hips tightly against the hand that services you... 

...as the pressure of your molars squeeze the flesh of his shoulder...it’s heavenly pressure...the taste of copper as you suck it down... 

Crosshair’s fevered thrusts of his hips. 

The fevered ministrations of his hand. 

Ragged breaths mixed with groans...whimpers... 

You release your mouth from his shoulder, as you gasp for air... blood trailing down his back from the punctures. Small crimson rivulets running down your chin, neck, across your erect nipples...you fall back...Pressing your head into the bunk...eyes widening...mouth open. His left hand on the small of your back like a spotter, his right sending you over the edge... 

Clenching your abdomen...you feel that tickle...the beginning of... 

Crosshair stops and pulls his hand away. You grab his arm devastated, angry even to be thwarted from your orgasm. 

Breathlessly “I want to FEEL you...from the INSIDE.” It’s not presented as a question. But he’s waiting for your consent. 

You reach down, stroke his sopping wet member. He moans and shudders. Then brush a ghost of a kiss across Crosshair’s forehead as you scoot fully onto the bunk and open yourself up to him. Your seductive gaze is inviting. 

Up off his knees, he slinks over you on the bunk. Staring like a hungry animal.  

For a fleeting moment, you don’t see Crosshair there...just Hunter. Your desire threatens to topple over into grief...all these emotions bubbling up from the surface. That scar will NEVER be totally healed. The sadness that will NEVER totally leave. 

Crosshair watches the subtle changes of your expression and senses this. He understands. While there are differences, it’s his loss too. 

He covers his body with yours, basking in the warmth skin to skin. Then takes your face in his hands. Touching foreheads, he whispers promises for you both in the future. All the things you will do together and the burdens you will both share and support each other through. Every one of them ends with a kiss as a promise.  

“I’m not Hunter...but...I’ll work on being a better man than I was in my past.”  

“I don’t want you to live in Hunter’s shadow. You’re different. Our relationship will be different.” 

Silence. 

“I’m SO SORRY you lost your brother.” 

Crosshair covers his face with his hand. Silent tears spill out between his fingers. 

You say no more and hold him tightly. Knowing it was A LOT for him to even let go like this. Knowing the relationship, he had with especially Hunter was fraught with so much emotional angst. And the heavy burden Crosshair holds about the horrible things he did at the end. 

You both lay there for some time wrapped up together in each other's arms...just being. Crosshair’s head resting on your chest, listening to your heartbeat. You rubbing gentle circles though his hair. 

Finally, he speaks, “Would you like me to finish?” Looking up at you seriously with those intense dark eyes. 

You read him like a book. He knows you too well now. There’s a deep care for one another. But you both know the sex tonight will be for dealing with the grief. That's ok though. It’s an unspoken agreement of how this will help the two of you bond and heal.  

You’ll both drink, fight, fuck, laugh, and all manner of things together while dealing with this shared grief. Whatever gets you by. It’ll bind you both thick as thieves. 

“Yes.” 

He kisses down your body to your sex. Licking, sucking, lavishing you with an intensity that prevents you from lying still. All the while grinding his returned erection into the sheets, soaking them. 

You both begin to get vocal. He adds more stimulation with his fingers, driving you wild. Grasping the bedding, you arch your back again. With the pressure in your core, his tongue wetly sliding over your sex...your breathing reaches a fever pitch...the tingling returns... 

“Crosshair...” 

He stops, sits up, gently pulls your hips to position, and slides his length into you. 

“Fuuuck...” he groans loudly, slowly pulling out, then slowly sliding in...he wants to feel it ALL. No rush. Just the amazing sensation...every inch...of him...against you... 

...sliding out... 

...sliding in... 

His legs are shaking. 

Your breath not just respirations but moans to the timing of his thrusts. 

...sliding out... 

...sliding in... 

Crosshair’s eyes are hooded in desire. He can see you’re about to cum. A crooked, horny smile crosses his face. 

The tingle becomes a wave... 

IT RUSHES THROUGH YOU like beautiful warm surf racing towards your sex... 

...and reaches its destination... 

You arch your back deeper...He’s watching you at the apex of your orgasm. Time seems to slow down for a few seconds. Eyes open with no angst, anger, judgement, spite, sass...his eyes...the window to a man WIDE OPEN at this moment in time. He’s telling you with his eyes what his voice could not.  

You’re staring above right into those eyes as your head presses just a centimeter deeper into the bedding...you inhale DEEPLY as those warm tendrils explode deep at the base of your core.  

Orgiastic moan-scream comes from your mouth so intensely you feel it in the roof of your mouth. Vision fuzzing out slightly. Tiny warm explosions of nerves firing everywhere in your body.  

Crosshair squeezes you tightly, screaming gutturally, eyes shut tight, and shuddering inside you with his own climax. Both of your sensory stimuli shut out to the outside world: Only aware of you both connected at the junction of your bodies.  

And then the orgasm dissipates like a wave being pulled back out to sea. Seafoam settling in and tickling the shoals of your sex.  

You feel warm and tingly...the rush of all those endorphins. He collapses gently on top of you. Gathering each other up in embrace. 

laying in each other’s arms realizing the future is wide open. It's a bit daunting...scary even. But you have each other. And, for now, that will do. 

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[jcbbby]

Preacher's Girl

OKAY FIRST OF ALL, don't fucking look at me right now (especially if you're Jamie...) I know I will not see the gates of heaven for this. anyway... hello, it has been a minute since I wrote a thing. this is a fic centered on Jamie's Preacher character from the I Am music video. and I'm just gonna leave it at that. also this is not proofread!

warnings: 18+ ONLY I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL BLOCK YOU DNI, preacher!Jamie x oc, p in v, unprotected sex (DON'T do it), religious imagery and themes, breeding kink if you squint sort of, also kind of a slow burn at first?

***** Cicadas droned outside through the open windows, loud enough to cut through the sound of the quiet chatter amongst the crowd mixed with the whipping of the little old ladies fluttering their hand fans. Ivy stared out of the open window of the sweltering church, trying to zone out to forget where she was. On the eager request of her grandparents and the encouragement of her mother, she agreed to spend the summer with them in their rural Alabama town. It was a much different pace of life out here compared to the bustling city life she was used to.

Her grandparents were old-fashioned, and very religious; something she never seemed to inherit. Her mother had moved out to the east coast to get away from that culture, opting for a more exciting and open-minded life. So, when she seemed to agree that a summer away in the quiet southern state would be good for Ivy, she was shocked.

“It will give you some nice perspective!” She said. “Plus, your grandparents won’t be here forever, you should cherish the time you have left with them.”

Her mother wasn’t wrong, but that did little to ignite any semblance of excitement over the thought. What was there to do in rural Alabama for a young woman from the city? Still, with her sweet old Nana and Pop eager to host their darling granddaughter, she begrudgingly said yes, soon finding herself in the sticky, thick, hazy summer air of the south. Arriving on a Saturday, of course their plan was to get an early night in so they could introduce her to everyone at their church in the morning.

The church must have had been built in the 1800s, still lacking almost all modern features. No air conditioning, no bathrooms, and no modern technology, save for a single microphone at the podium, connected to a small PA speaker. Ivy fanned herself with her hand, glancing around to survey the audience while her grandparents conversed with an older couple in front of them in the first row of pews. As she looked around, a hush fell over, and gazes shifted to the front of the church. She snapped her head in the direction of the crowd, a tall, dark figure emerging from the side of the slightly raised stage.

He stepped up to the podium, placing his hands over either side of the edge, clearing his throat before glancing down and taking a breath. He was surprisingly younger than Ivy was expecting and stood tall and slim. His golden chin-length hair neatly descended from under a large brim black hat. He wore a very fitted three-piece black suit and white button-up dress shirt. As he looked out over the crowd of parishioners, he smiled warmly, letting the skin around his eyes crinkling perfectly into what reminded Ivy of sun rays.

“Good morning, everyone.” He spoke in a deep, warm voice. “Thank you for being here with me today. Let us begin.”

Ivy stared in awe. He was breathtaking. She straightened up in her seat as he began speaking his gospel. His words filled the heavy air of the church and she found herself feeling stuck in his honey smooth voice, hanging on to each word he uttered. Never in her life would she have thought she would find herself paying such close attention to a church sermon.

He moved his gaze in her direction, momentarily locking eyes with her as she felt her cheeks grow hot. Ivy shifted in her seat, darting her eyes down to his shoes. When she dared to glance back up, he was still looking directly at her. He flashed a gentle smirk to her before breaking away. Ivy let out a breath she didn’t realize she was holding, feeling a shiver run throughout her body. There was something somewhat devious about that smirk. Maybe there would be some excitement this summer in this dirt road town.

*****

Once the service had ended, the church was hosting a start of the summer lunch reception at the community center just down the road. Of course, Ivy’s grandparents were keen to go. This was a town where everyone knew everyone, community events were obligatory at best. She let out a sigh of relief upon walking through the double metal doors of the community center, feeling the breeze of air conditioning hitting her damp face. She followed closely behind her grandparents as they made their way to the table of various foods, mostly homemade.

“I’m going to just go get us a table, I’m not that hungry.” Ivy tapped her grandmother’s shoulder.

“Oh, honey bee, you really oughtta eat something or else you’ll get sick! Here, you’ve got to try Darlene’s biscuits at least!” She handed Ivy a dense golden biscuit.

“Oh…okay, thanks nana.” Ivy forced a smiled before turning to take stock of open seats.

As she sat down, she looked around the large room, hoping to spot the preacher who had her so enamored. She scanned the perimeter, eyes narrowing.

“Well, it seems we have a visitor today.” An oaky voice came from behind her. She turned to see him standing there, the preacher, towering over her. “May I?” He gestured to the seat next to her.

“Of course.” She smiled politely.

He took off his hat, placing it gently on the table in front of him. He smoothed back his hair with one hand, looking to Ivy to reveal his enchanting ice blue eyes.

“Does our visitor have a name?” He smiled.

“I’m Ivy. Uh, I’m Dale and Irene’s granddaughter.” She returned the polite smile, hoping he didn’t notice the quick up and down she gave him or the rosy tint to her cheeks.

“Oh, how nice. Yes, I’ve heard a lot about you. I’m Jamie, just Jamie, I don’t do the fancy clergy title. Pleasure to meet you.” He winked, extending his hand out to her.

“Nice to meet you too.” She met his hand with hers.

“Oh, good! You’ve met Jamie!” Ivy’s grandmother set her plate down on the table, sinking down into her seat.

“Hello Irene, lovely to see you.” He smiled. “Dale.” He nodded and reached to shake his hand as well. “I was just telling Ivy here that I had heard so much about her from you two, it’s nice to finally meet her.” He looked back to Ivy with a grin.

“Oh, well we’re just so happy to have her here. She’s staying for the summer with us.” Irene beamed.

“Is that so?” Jamie’s voice lilted. “Well, it will be so great to see another pretty face around town for a while.” He winked, facing Ivy so the elder couple wouldn’t notice. Ivy’s heart thumped against her chest. “Well, I’ll let you all be, I’m sure you’ve got things to catch up on. Great to have you with us, Miss Ivy.” Jamie reached for her hand, lifting it to his lips to give a gentle kiss.

“Uh…just Ivy.” She grinned. “Y-yes. It’s great to be here. Thank you.”

Jamie picked up his hat from the table, setting back on his head. He gave Ivy one final look before turning to greet those at the next table over. Ivy bit her lip as she glanced at the hand he had kissed, taking in a breath. His charm was unrelenting, and it knocked the wind clear out of her. She stared, thoughts racing through her mind, as he greeted some other parishioners. Her grandfather’s voice managed to pull her out of her trance, her attention snapping back to the elder.

“Such a nice fella, that one. All the folks around here love him.” Her grandfather said through a mouthful of food. “We were a little wary when he came to replace old Father Wilkins after he died, what with him being so young and all. But I gotta say he’s a real man of faith.”

“How long has he been in town?” Ivy asked.

“Oh I’d say about a year or so now. Said he came from the west, out in the desert, I think. The town’s really taken to him though, you’d think he was a southern boy from the start if it wasn’t for that accent.” He took another bite of his sandwich.

“Yeah, he seems…really friendly.” Ivy turned to look at him conversing with a couple, not much older than she was. She certainly wouldn’t admit it to anyone, but part of her wondered just how friendly he could get.

*****

Over the following few weeks, Ivy found herself looking forward to Sunday services. Each time she attended church, her eyes would seek out Jamie, and he would reciprocate with small glances and smiles. The innocent exchanges gave her butterflies, and she often caught herself daydreaming about him during the weekdays. Perhaps riding around in the old beat-up truck he drove around, windows down, hands intertwined over the center console; relaxing in the shade under the willow tree down by the pond behind the old mill.

But some nights, alone in her room after her grandparents had gone to sleep, she found herself even fantasizing about Jamie. Though she wasn’t religious herself, there was something so guilty about thinking of a man of the church in this way. He was probably pure, saving himself for marriage. Still, Ivy couldn’t help but sense something hidden under his holy exterior. There was something hidden, and the intrigue consumed her.

The two hadn’t shared more than a few cordial words each weekend, between the glances, though. She was beginning to wonder if she had just been completely misreading things through the rose-colored glasses of her own desires.

One Sunday after the service, Jamie stood in the doorway of the church bidding his congregation goodbye as they shuffled out into the bright midday humidity.

“Irene, Dale, Ivy.” He smiled and nodded politely as they passed by him. “Oh, Ivy!” He followed.

“Yes?” She replied, stopping to turn around.

“I’m wondering if you might be interested in volunteering for the end of summer fair that we’re putting on for the kids next weekend. We could really use an extra set of hands, if you’re able.” He smiled.

“Oh, how fun! Ivy would love to help out, wouldn’t you honey bee?!” Irene excitedly grabbed her arm.

Ivy looked between Irene and Jamie. “Uh…yeah, sure. I can help.” She pushed a smile.

Jamie stood up straighter, flashing a toothy grin. “Wonderful. It’s appreciated. We’re having a volunteer meeting with everyone helping on Wednesday night at 7pm, if you can make it.”

“Sure, yeah, I’ll be there.”

He tipped his hat to her. “See you then.”

While Ivy somewhat begrudgingly agreed, she was excited at the opportunity to spend more time with the intriguing preacher during her final week here. She didn’t expect much, but at least she would be able to be around him, drinking in the sight of his tall figure and wonderfully sculpted face.

*****

The Wednesday meeting arrived, going as one would typically expect. The logistics and volunteer duties and assignments were discussed, the timeline, a question-and-answer portion. Jamie dismissed the volunteers, thanking them for their time commitment and willingness to assist.

“Ivy, would you mind hanging back a minute. There’s something I forgot to go over with you.” Jamie called out from his seat as the small group filed down the aisle.

Ivy turned around, letting a few others walk by her on either side. “Yeah, what’s up?”

“Come sit.” Jamie gestured to the pew in front of him.

She complied, coming to sit down. As the last person went out the door, it closed behind them with a click that echoed throughout the room. Jamie got up from his chair on the platform, coming down to the pew where Ivy sat and sitting beside her. She felt her breathing pick up slightly, his cologne enveloping the air around her.

Jamie turned to her. “Ivy, I’ve noticed something has been weighing on you.”

Her stomach dropped. He had noticed the way she had been looking at him and the blushing when he glanced back at her after all. She felt his hand rest on her thigh, drawing her out of her own mind and thoughts. She looked down to her lap and then back up to him. His eyes were dark and suggestive.

“Have you had…sinful thoughts?” He asked calmly.

Swallowing hard, Ivy paused, opening her mouth to speak but having no earthly idea of how to respond. She resolved to a shallow nod, darting her eyes anywhere but to his, unsure of how honest she could be with him. Her mind reeled, caught between the boundaries of his position and her own suppressed desires. Jamie nodded back to her, looking forward and letting his gaze wander.

“I have to admit…” He turned his gaze now to her. “I have too.”

Ivy’s heart was in her throat. “Oh?” Was all she could manage to squeak out, the warmth of his hand still radiating through the fabric of her sundress. He leaned in closer to her, his breath brushing against her earlobe.

“Will you hear my confession?” He whispered.

She turned to him, their faces mere centimeters from each other. “Y-yes…”

He met her eyes with his own. “Those thoughts have been about you.” He said in a hushed tone, his thumb beginning to caress where it rested on her thigh.

A mix of shock and excitement washed over Ivy, burning itself all the way down to her core. She hadn't expected him to be so candid and so forward. She found herself still speechless, never having thought her desires would be equally reciprocated. After a beat, she found her voice.

"Is...is that even allowed?" She whispered, concerned about a faith she didn't even fully understand. “I thought that god-“

"Do you even believe in god?" Jamie interrupted, his tone genuine.

Ivy hesitated before admitting, "No, I don’t…"

Jamie smirked. "Then don't worry about it." He said, leaning closer, his other hand coming to grip her chin. "You don't have to pretend to be so innocent then, do you, my little lamb?"

“I…” She started to reply before his hand on her thigh ventured deeper between her legs. Her breath hitched as his fingers brushed against the panties that were already wet with her neediness.

“What, you what?” He cooed, still holding her chin tightly with his other hand, forcing her to look him in the eyes. “Tell me what you want.”

“I…” She breathed. “I want you to touch me. Please.”

She felt his lips crash against hers, like a man starved. He released her chin, slinking his hand around her neck and up the back of her head. She quickly adjusted herself, swinging her leg over his to sit on his lap, straddling him.

“Not so timid anymore it seems.” Jamie pulled back, smirking.

“I just said I don’t believe in god, I’m going to hell anyway, I might as well enjoy myself along the way.” She wrapped her arms around his neck.

“I can give you something to believe in.” In a swift motion, Jamie slipped his hands under Ivy’s thighs, lifting her up as he stood up.

He walked them both towards the platform, stepping up, and pressing her back against the wall, just under a large wooden cross. Her legs stayed wrapped around his waist, hands rustling through his golden hair. His lips furiously pressed against hers, tongue and teeth coming together in a raw passion. His mouth ventured down to her neck, nipping and suckling just under her ear as Ivy let out a gentle whimper. She felt his length hardening against her inner thigh, making her need for him grow stronger.

“Are you gonna fuck me right here under this cross?” She breathed.

Jamie abruptly stopped, pulling back to look her in the eye. He let her legs fall individually and took half a step back. Ivy furrowed her brow, confused. She wondered if he had suddenly had a change of heart, or if he realized how sacrilegious this all was.

“Hey.” He said sternly. “We’re in a church. You should know you can’t use that language in the house of the lord.”

“Oh, uh-“

“You know you have to be punished.” He smirked wickedly, stepping backward again.

Ivy’s blood pumped furiously through her veins, excitement overtaking her. This was undoubtedly so wrong, but so thrilling. He glanced to the lectern, where a thick bible sat neatly on top. He took it in his hand, turning back to Ivy. He pulled the chair on the platform closer to him, taking a seat and patting his lap.

“Come on.” He gestured. “Bend over, take your punishment.”

Ivy hesitantly made her way over to Jamie, slowly sinking herself lower and folding herself over his lap. Her breath was heavy, anticipating. He cleared his throat and reached for the hem of her dress, sliding it slowly upwards, fully revealing her light pink panties. He neatly folded the fabric at the small of her back, gently smoothing it out with minimal pressure.

“Now…” He sighed.

He drew back the hand holding the bible, and with a swift flick of his wrist, the leather-bound cover made sharp, unforgiving contact with Ivy’s supple backside. She let out a shrill yelp as it came down on her flesh, knowing full well this would leave a mark. Without missing a beat, Jamie pulled back and delivered another hard whack to her. Her shriek echoed off the walls of the empty church, this rap stinging worse than the first one on her already red skin. Tears began to well in the corner of her eyes.

“P-please…I’m sorry.” She whimpered softly.

“What was that, my little lamb?” He reached with his other hand to softly stroke her hair, countered quickly with a third strike of the bible.

Ivy tensed up over his lap, crying out again. “I’m sorry!”

Jamie continued petting her head, now resting his other hand and the book on her back. He leaned down closer to her ear, smiling softly. “Will you be good for me now?”

Ivy took in a shattered breath. “Yes... Yes, I’ve learned my lesson.”

“Good girl.” Jamie whispered. “Now, sit up…”

Ivy did as she was told, peeling her torso off his lap only to swing her leg over and straddle him once again. She sniffled lightly as she looked at him directly again, eyes still slightly glossy from her punishment. His hands slid around her waist, pulling her closer to him.

“To answer your question from before…” He began. “Yes, I am going to fuck you right here under this cross. I am going to show god that you’re mine.”

Before Ivy could respond, his lips were already pressing hungrily into hers. He began to trail down her jaw and on to her neck, suckling hard enough to make sure he would leave his mark. She reached between both of their bodies, undoing the button and zipper of his pants just enough to free his hardened length. She took him in her hand and stroked him slowly, a low groan emanating from his throat. His hot breath against her skin made her already desperate core throb, she felt as though she could combust at any moment.

With his lips still exploring her neck and collarbone, he moved to quickly lower the straps of her dress, letting them fall to her elbows. He tugged at the top hem of the dress, letting her chest reveal itself, spilling out over the fabric. His mouth made quick work of enveloping her nipple in its warmth, drawing out a pleasured sigh from Ivy. She began to grind against his thigh, hoping for some sense of relief.

“Come on, then.” She breathed. “Make me yours. Take me.”

Jamie let out a breathy chuckle, removing her hands from his cock, slipping his hands under her dress and under the elastic of her panties. She rested her wrists on his shoulders, staring down as he pushed the fabric aside, gently pushing her upward to angle his tip at her entrance. She gasped as she sunk down slowly, feeling the stretch of him inside. He let out a groan as Ivy now fully enveloped in, her weight fully back on his lap. She leaned forward, resting her forehead against his briefly before closing the gap between their lips. Her hips rocked forward, his hands gripping her hips to help her along. Suddenly, he pulled back.

“Say it, before god, say that you’re mine.” He growled, rocking his hips in rhythm with hers. “I don’t care what you believe in, you’re going to believe in me. Say it.”

“I-I’m yours!” Ivy mewled. “I’m yours.” She fell forward against his chest, wrapping her arms around his neck.

“Yeah, you’re my good girl. My good girl.” He growled again into her neck.

The two of them clung to each other, the space around them filled with their moans and breathing, the aggressive creaking of the wooden chair they were occupying. If the church hadn’t been the only building on its acre of land, someone would have heard them through the open windows.

A gentle breeze made its way through the large hall, raising goosebumps across their sticky, shiny skin, covered in the humid dew of the south. Their movements were in perfect sync, each one locked into the other’s body, as if they were a symbiotic pair; as if they were to lose contact, their bodies would shrivel up and wither away into the wind.

“Look at me.” Jamie whispered. “I want you to look at me as I finish in you. As I claim you.”

Ivy pulled back to look at him, arching her back as she did. “Yes, Jamie…please…let god know I’m yours.” She sighed, digging her nails into his shoulders.

His thrusts became more haphazard, and his grunts frequent. Ivy rolled her hips along with him, the pressure building throughout her core, sensing the euphoria just over the horizon. As if it were a divine purpose, she slipped over the edge just as Jamie spilled out inside her. Ivy fell forward again, burying her face in his neck as she rode out her high, as Jamie wrapped his arms tightly around her. They slowly came to a still, only the sound of their heavy breathing and birds singing outside the church walls filling their ears along with low ringing.

As their senses came back to them, they relaxed their hold on the other. Ivy pulled back from the crook of Jamie’s neck, smoothing her damp hair out of her face. He smiled softly up at her, taking her chin in his hand again, only this time pulling her tenderly toward him to place a gentle kiss to her lips.

“How are you doing, little lamb?” He asked sweetly, his voice no longer gruff and demanding, but kind and warm.

“I’m…feeling saved.” She smiled.

He chuckled lightly as he caressed her cheek. “Oh, is that all it takes?”

Ivy slid herself off his lap, letting him tuck himself back in to his trousers. “You said you’d make a believer out of me. I definitely believe in a lot more than I did before I came here.” She winked.

“Well…you have a few days left here. I can certainly give you a lot more to believe in, darling.” He smirked at her as he stood up, reaching out his hand, silently asking for hers.

Ivy smiled, glancing between his eyes and his hand.

“I’m all yours.”

[chairofchaos]

Evening friend!

You bring chaos to my life so here is a little chaos for you

2, 3, 5, 8, 19, 26

And just for fun because I know it will probably hurt me 40

Feel free to answer what you want and ignore the rest 🤍

GOOD EVENING.

Thank you for letting me bring chaos to your life, and for bringing me some in return. In your honor, I will answer all. Seemed like the most chaotic thing to do. I considered making separate posts for each question but then again that was a lot of work so just... bear with me. This is a long read, but hopefully, you will find it worth it.

2. Anything that you'd like to write but feel like you're unable to?

Yes. I am currently bouncing around multiple Greek/Roman tragedy adaptations of our beloved ACOTAR and TOG characters. I do not feel prepared to write these yet. I want to do them justice. That semester of studying tragic plays of the ancients has stuck with me.

3. How would you describe your writing style?

I don't even know how to answer this, but my best shot is this:

The vibe must be chaotic.

It must be written as fast as possible.

It should be entirely unplanned.

If it is planned, it should be entirely overwhelming and likely a bigger project than I should ever take on *cough cough* LETTERS *cough cough*

It's not a style as much as it is entirely based on my whims. And that's not always great. In fact, it's something I don't really enjoy about myself (comment on this and I will edit it out of this post so fast I SWEAR).

But I enjoy the product. I think there are at least a couple of you that do, too, so hopefully we can all enjoy that little piece of chaos together. If not, I'll just enjoy the pain I create on my own like a good little fanfic writer.

5. What's a tag you never want to use for your works even when it applies?

I don't think such a thing exists. I don't like surprises? Idk, this doesn't really make sense to me. Clearly I have no problem tagging things Dead Dove so we all know what I'm up to lol

8. How slow is a slow burn?

Somewhere between 100 and 100k words. I genuinely do not care. Depends on the medium? The pacing? A slow burn described in a poem is going to look very different than a slow burn in a fic the length of The Iliad and the Odyssey. Or Wheel of Time (that's a long series, right?). I don't care. It's all great. I love slow burns. Haven't written one because I think those characters should be enjoying each other romantically on page 1, but I LOVE reading them.

19. Share a snippet from a wip without giving any context for it.

UNANSWERED STARS YOU BEAUTIFUL HUMAN. Is this what you expect to hurt (I haven't looked ahead at the other questions I'm doing this straight through, no edits, no takebacks. Welcome to Chaos- you get two.).

Eris was no saint, either. Cauldron knew he kept his mate up some nights. But the Cauldron also knew Azriel would get out of bed in the middle of the night and take off into flight, not returning until he knew Eris would also be awake. After the first time, they would rarely talk about where Azriel went or what he did. Instead, Eris would press a mug of overly sweet coffee into his hands and they would sit together in silence on the front porch, Azriel’s head on Eris’ shoulder and their hands clasped together. - {Working Title is Coffee and Psychotherapy. THIS ONE IS ACTUALLY FLUFF YOU CAN THANK DUSK-MUSE AND NINTHCIRCLEOFPRYTHIAN}

And maybe more along the lines of what you were expecting:

Azriel found the most enjoyment in the training and teaching of others. In his time as spymaster, he regularly found time to work with young soldiers, for which many have since thanked him, crediting him with saving their lives by instructing them in his limited spare time. In the years since the war, Azriel enjoyed collecting books from all over the world. The collection he amassed was the instigator for a library to honor his mate. - Death, and All That Follows (This may or may not be a sort of extended epilogue to something I wrote recently.)

26. What would you describe as OOC?

This is possibly a wild take: I don't think I care what is out of character for characters I write. It depends on the fic, sure. But I think perspective forms our understanding of characters, and seeing them in a new light can often bring a different, even "OOC" type attitude to fics which I often enjoy. I am very much an advocate for "Don't Like, Don't Read" not only for plot points but for characterization as well. If you don't enjoy the way someone writes your favorite (or your least-favorite!) character, don't read it. The beautiful thing about being a part of a fandom is the diversity of experiences within it.

I did not read Nesta's journey the same way you did, or the way your friend did, or the way my best friend did. I brought my own perspectives, my own experiences, to my interpretation of her actions, words, and thoughts. I came out of the other side loving her, and loving the way she loves. I recognize myself in her. I know I'm not alone in that. I know that there are a great many who do not like her in the slightest.

ACOSF Nesta was presented very differently to ACOTAR Nesta. (For the purposes of this argument, we are removing the debate about The Author Herself because I simply don't care at the moment and that's a much larger topic.) I don't think that anyone's interpretation of Nesta is "wrong" or "bad" because we all bring a pair of glasses to reading, and that glass is made of our experiences. That's the filter through which you consume the work. My glasses are different from yours. That's okay.

Little tangent while we're on the topic: I don't care if your glasses are different. But if you break those glasses to use the shards of glass for the purpose of hurting other people, that's a problem. I have a problem now, and so do you. Because of the inclusion of the argument above, it needed to be said, and so here it is: Don't hurt others because of your glasses. Theirs are different. Please learn to recognize that, and that it is okay to view pieces of media differently. Tangent over.

So TLDR on OOC: I don't care. If you want to write a piece where character canonically named Bubblegum Sunshine Princess because of her (in-canon) overwhelming joy and love of the outdoors and her kingdom's candy trees is a murderous assassin filled with rage and the destructive flame of a thousand suns, go right ahead. There's a very good chance I would love to read it.

40. Write a 9-word fic.

Title: This is a Thing [REDACTED] Learned. The title will be longer than the fic itself, and that's the beauty of The Thing [REDACTED] Learned. Thanks.

A/N: (Stars. My dearest friend. You expect pain here? Now I want to prove you wrong...)

Pairing: Your OTP. Or my OCs. Or is this about my life? Or yours? Who knows. I'm not currently well lol

...........................................

Knowledge came with no promises, no love, no you.

...........................................

All the love, Stars. You're the best. <3<3<3<3<3

[rafesangelita]

[🍪] chocolate chip cookie, includes; a fic inspired by a song of your choice!

maybe frat!rafe or either dealer!rafe (👀) with friends by chase atlantic😁😁😁😁😁😁😁they’re at a party and all her friends are fucked up and yk HAKSJDKD

₊˚⊹ᰔ 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬

pairing: dealer!rafe x fem!reader

summary: ❝all of your friends have been here for too long, they must be waiting for you to move on. girl, i’m not with it, i’m way too far gone.❞ — after confessing his feelings for you, rafe gets nervous and leaves you the following morning. now you two are at a party, and he isn’t leaving without you.

warnings: friends w benefits au, mentions of drinking and dealing of drugs, arguing, suggestive ending

word count: 0.7k

a/n: wrote this with s2 rafe in mind..

you were the only sober one at this party. along with rafe, who never drank when he was dealing, and vowed to never get high on his own supply. you knew he’d be here— a party wasn’t a party if rafe wasn’t serving up people in the corner of the living room. you stared at him from a distance, his eyes occasionally finding yours when he looked up from the stacks of money on the table. you hated how good he looked tonight. skin flushed with a sheen of sweat from having so many people around him, his bangs hanging loosely in his face, with that blue jeans and white t-shirt combo that you loved so much.

you swallowed thickly, your trance being broken when one of your, very drunk, friends grabbed onto your arm for support. “stop looking at himmm!” she slurred, cackling when you rolled your eyes. “he just wants you for himself without any real commitment.” she nearly lost her footing, a yelp leaving her lips as you decided to guide her out of the kitchen. while your friend wasn’t all the way wrong, she didn’t know enough about you and rafe’s ‘situationship’ to form an opinion on it. your friends only knew what you told them, which meant they’ve only ever heard your annoyed rants.

“let’s get you over here..” you sat her down on the couch where the rest of your friends drunkenly talked amongst each other. rafe wasn’t far from where you sat, his laugh echoing in your ears as he started stuffing his black backpack full of cash. you could tell by the smile on his face that he had a good night for shop. sensing that you were looking at him, rafe felt the burn of your gaze as he got up, having no intention of leaving this party without you on his arm. you smelled his cologne before he approached you, the scent making your heart flutter in your chest.

“hey, can we talk?” rafe stopped in front of you, your friends turning around at the sound of his voice. you looked up at him, cursing under your breath at how handsome he was. “leave her alone, asshole!” rafe smiled at your friend, flipping her off before getting you up and taking you outside. “your friends are annoying as fuck.” he stopped by his truck, backing you up against the vehicle until his thigh sat comfortably between your legs. you knew what he was doing. “they’re drunk..” you glared at him, “what do you want?” rafe tilted his head at your words. “what do i want?” he repeated.

“you gonna act like you weren’t staring me down in there?” he laughed, cupping your chin. “you look pretty.” turning your head away from him, you shrugged him off as you arched a brow. “i was looking at you, and?” you ignored his little compliment. “..and you haven’t replied to any of my messages or called me back.. why?” you shook your head. “are you seriously asking me this? you tell me you have feelings for me while you’re inside of me, and then leave without a word in the morning? excuse me if i felt like you were toying with me or something.” you crossed your arms over your chest.

“i got nervous, alright! but i swear to you i meant every word. i would never mess with you like that..” he stepped closer. “i’ve been wanting this, us, for a long time, y/n. i’m not good at this stuff, but i want to try, i want to do it with you.” your gaze softened. “do you mean that?” your voice was small, a clear indication that you weren’t trying to argue with him anymore. “i fucking swear by it.” you watched as his jaw clenched. “i wont disappoint you, baby.” finally, for the first time in two weeks, he took you in his arms. you sighed, feeling a weight you didn’t know was there, lift off of your shoulders.

“is this a revenge dress?” you laughed when he pulled away, inspecting your outfit. “no, but it worked.” you teased. rafe leaned down and kissed you, in which you wasted no time in returning. “come on, let’s get out of here.. ‘before your friends threaten me.” you let him place you in the passenger seat, a squeal leaving your lips when he landed a harsh smack to your ass.

[the-aleksy-show]

😅 Any sort of kiss scenes (especially when I'm sex-repulsed)

🥺Angst with a happy ending (I cry mentally when I write that stuff)

🤡 "It's all tits, pain and suffering from then on" - A long abandoned Stranger Things wip I haven't touched since august.

😈 Its usually when I make the characters (ocs or not) have mental breakdowns at the end of the story because I need to project my problems onto them.

✍ No. I'm just going balls to the wall, ten million spelling mistakes insane.

🛒 I usually project whatever shit I'm going through (ergo; chronic pain, gender crisis, pain) to make myself try to come to terms with this stuff. And, also, there's always going to be a main character that is gay and traumatized. I swear. Those are the two things you will always find in my books, fics or original works

🎢 Which of your fics would you call your wildest ride? Probably that fic I haven't touched since august (I wrote like a 30 something page chapter that spanned like, two hours in incredible detail)

✨ I'm so good at writing angst and bad at resolving it.

💋 I. Love. First. Kiss. Fics! They make me want to explode.

🎶 I usually listen to punk stuff when I write, and, lately I've been listening to 'Bitchboy' and 'The Boys Wanna Be Her' over and over again.

🛠 I use Microsoft Word (I've tried to use google docs but I fcking hate it)

⛔ Yes. Many, actually. There's this Outlander fic, this... other Outlander fic, that good good poly Stranger Things fic, an Anne with an E fic, and I

🙋‍♀️ Yes. Most my friend group know about my fic writing, I even gave one of them the link to the fic.

🍦 What's the sweetest fic you've created so far? I don't know, but I am planning a Slow Burn AU

🍷 I drink orange juice when I write sometimes if that's what you mean

🍆 Oh my god no. I could never (no hate to smut writers, I love you guys so much, but i could never. You guys are braver than me).

🌞The early mornings and late at night.

💖 Quarantine. I had nothing else to do, so I was like, heck yeah, lets start writing

💌 Terrified. I feel absolute terror.

❌ Kidnapper/ Stalked romance or anything abuse (I have it and it makes me so uncomfortable)

💲Maybe, I don't really know.

🧐 Yes. Most of the time, yeah

🏆 I've only posted one, so... that's the most popular.

🎃 I like writing Christmas and Summer Holiday fics

🎯 No. I have 21 hits on ao3 its not really a big thing.

🎨 I would marry them at once.

📈 I have about a million wips.

🦅 I either overplan the fic or just start something without thinking

👀 Okay, so there's this Autumn AU thing going on with a slow burn and stuff like that, I don't even want to talk about it.

🤗 Just do it. Like, just go ahead. Do whatever you want. Write the fic. Go utterly insane. Have fun.

💞 Don't ask, I cant. I don't even beleive that... that's the comfort character that I picked to obsess about.

🧠 Tell me a headcanon you have for one of your favourite characters. I'm interested

🤩 Who is your favorite character to write? I'll take that as meaning character trope or something, and that favourite character trope is 'Swagless Bisexual Man Wearing A Leather Jacket And Eyeliner'

🤲 "Hey. Is it gay to look at a man and have your breath gey caught up in your throat and then your eyes get all wide and you want to like... run away and jump into your bed and scream into a pillow while kicking your legs in the air like a highschooler?" - The Autumn AU wip

😬 Probably the one Im planning to post. If anyone in my friend group ever found that one I would let the earth reclaim me.

🎉 The only one I actually posted.

✅ Trauma.

📚 Of course. I've wanted to be a writer since I was eleven.

⌛ Maybe four days to write a chapter, maybe more.

🤯 I'm really bad at writing sci-fi and mystery.

💔 Well, there was 5000 Miles Away which made me litterally cry throughout the whole thing. The fluff killled me.

💥 As long as its constructive and given in a nice way I'll let it happen. Ill still regret existing and cry for three days, but... okay?

🤭 Everyone Is Gay

🥰 Of course! That would be amazing!

Fanfic Writer Emoji Ask

😅 What's a story or scene you've created that you're a smidge embarrassed exists?

🥺 Is there a certain type of moment or common interaction between your characters that never fails to put you in your feels?

🤡 What's a line, scene, or exchange you've written that made you laugh?

😈 Has there been a point in a story where you did something just to be playfully mean to your readers?

✍ Do you have a beta reader?

🛒 What are some common things you incorporate in your fics? Themes, feels, scenes, imagery, etc.

🎢 Which of your fics would you call your wildest ride?

✨ Give you and your writing a compliment. Go on now. You know you deserve it. 😉

💋 First kiss fics. Love em or hate em?

🎶 Do you listen to music while you write? What song have you been playing on loop lately?

🛠What tools/programs/apps do you use to write?

⛔ Do you have a fic you started, but scrapped?

🙋‍♀️ Do any irl people know you write fanfic?

🍦 What's the sweetest fic you've created so far?

🍷 Do you drink and write?

🍆 Do you write the spicy stuffs? If so, what's your most popular nsfw fic?

🌞 Do you have a preferred time of day to write?

💖 What made you start writing?

💌 How do you feel about comments and feedback?

❌ What's a trope you will never write?

💲 Would you ever open commissions?

🧐 Do you spend much time researching for your stories?

🏆 What's your most popular fic?

🎃 Do you write fics for certain holidays? Which is your favorite holiday inspired fic?

🎯 Have any of your readers accurately guessed major plot points? Care to share which?

🎨 How do you feel about fan art of your stories?

📈 How many fics do you have?

🦅 Do you outline fics or fly by the seat of your pants?

👀 Tell me about an up and coming wip please!

🤗 What advice would you give to new fanfic writers that are just getting started?

💞 Who's your comfort character?

🧠 Pick a character, and I'll tell you my favorite headcanon for them.

🤩 Who is your favorite character to write?

🤲 Would you please share a snippet of a wip?

😬 Which of your fics would you be most horrified for friends, family, or coworkers to stumble upon?

🎉 What leads you to consider a fic a success?

✅ What's something that appears in your fics over and over and over again, even if you don't mean to?

📚 Would you ever want to turn writing into a career?

⌛ How long does it take you to write a fic, or a chapter?

🤯 What's a genre you struggle with as a writer (ex. romance, action, etc.)?

💔 Is there a fic of yours that broke your heart?

💥 How do you feel about criticism?

🤭 Do you have a favorite tag to use when posting your works?

🥰 How do you feel about reader interaction? Are you open to receiving questions about your fics?

[ao3feed-brucewayne]

WIIDIA LOVES YOU

by Midnightdragon07

Something’s just dont fit in these chapters so here they go. Taking place intermittently in chapters of

What If I Do It Anyways,

Where you and Jason are roommates

Some shenanigans happen so I wrote them down and I’ll post them here, maybe it’ll be mentioned at points in the main fic and you can go see those and timeline them up or something. It’s all cool. Just know, the characters in these are the same in that.

Either way, thank you and enjoy.

Words: 946, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English

Series: Part 2 of Tell me, Jason. Why not?

Fandoms: DCU, Batman: Under the Red Hood (2010), Red Hood and the Outlaws (Comics), Batman: Arkham (Video Games), Batman - All Media Types

Rating: General Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Characters: Jason Todd, Reader, Red Hood, Roy Harper, Koriand'r (DCU), Dick Grayson, Tim Drake, Non-binary Reader, Bruce Wayne, Damian Wayne, Stephanie Brown, Cassandra Cain, Alfred Pennyworth

Additional Tags: Jason Todd Needs A Hug, Jason Todd Has Issues, Slow Burn, Slow Romance, Trust Issues, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Reader-Insert, Bruce Wayne Tries to Be a Good Parent, Dick Grayson Tries to Be a Good Older Sibling, tim is a good brother, Canon-Typical Violence, Jason Todd Swears, Jason Todd is Red Hood, Friends to Lovers, Strangers to Lovers, Kidnapping, Attempted Kidnapping, Neighbors, Neighbors to Friends to Lovers, break between outlaw stuff, Gender-Neutral Pronouns, Anxiety Attacks, Reader has anxiety and depression, reader has undiagnosed adhd, reader parents Jason sometimes, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, average citizen reader, canon is my bitch and i do what i want, no beta we die like jason, Marvel and DC dont just kiss. They full on get sloppy, have i mentioned yet that I choose what canon i use?, that gets important as time goes on, Theres more to reader than meets the eye, established background family and friends for reader, reader is an individual with their own life outside of jason, College Reader, Artist Reader

source https://archiveofourown.org/works/48194044

[duskholland]

Have u seen bridgerton because I will die within 36 hours if I can't read a fic about Tom telling me he burns for me

yes :D i wrote my richkid!tom fic right off the back of finishing it :’)) pls don't die <3

[munsonssub]

Well shit- Joseph Quinn x fem!reader

Prompt: you mistake joe for friend of a friend on a night out. Luckily it leads to a meet-cute

A/n: okay this is the first fic I have written in 7 years! Plus it’s my first ever reader insert so I apologize if it sucks but THERES LIKE NO JOE FICS SO I HAD TO WRITE MY OWN. Also I wrote this on my phone so idk how to edit italics to post if someone could help me. I also don’t know how to add a read more on mobile either so that’s fun. Help me pls

My husband proof read it so if there’s mistakes blame him.

Warnings: smoking, drinking, idk if there’s anything else.

Word count: 1,975. (Whoops)

A normal Saturday night. That’s what your friends promised you when they showed up at your flat three hours ago with two bottles of wine and a glint in their eyes. You should’ve known, should’ve picked up on the fact they showed up ready to go out. Maybe it was blind optimism, thinking they wouldn’t force you out of your cocoon of misery.

Listen, you know they want what’s best for you, with things at work piling up and your stupid now ex boyfriend always texting you, you know you need this. One night off, one night of freedom, one night to say fuck you and just party. But fuck man you just wanted to be back on your couch, watching shitty reality tv, probably snacking on too many sweets to be healthy. Instead you are sitting at a new bar that your friend swore up and down would be chill vibes.

Liar.

People were everywhere. You had lost half of the group when you got here, Already a bottle and a half of wine in.

So here you are, waiting to grab a couple shots while your friend Chloe stands beside you flirting with anyone who will give her a moment because the best drinks are free drinks. Which she isn’t wrong, but you’d just gotten out of a four year relationship, flirting is a foreign language now and you weren’t about to embarrass yourself like that.

When the bartender finally came over to you, you quickly ordered four shots, if you were here to have fun you were having fun, quickly sliding your cash to the bartender you nudged Chloe so she’d take her two shots while you took yours. Honestly you wouldn’t hate this so much if it was just you and her and the friends she showed up at your house with, but as you were getting in your cab to come to the bar she informed you that they were meeting up with other people there. It was quick when you met up barely getting glances of some of the people, as you struggled to light a cigarette. It was fine though as long as Chloe was with you, you knew you could make it through the night.

Finally letting the burning of the alcohol subside you grab Chloe’s hand to go to the dance floor, the next hour passes in a flash of bodies and drinks. Stumbling, very gracefully, you yelled to your other friend, Shelly, that you were going outside, needing a smoke and a break from the music. Pushing through the bodies you made your way to the door, mumbling apologies as you went.

Finally you could breathe once you were outside, mind numb and limps tired you started searching for your smoke pack, you know you put it in your pocket after the one you had when you arrived. Quietly mumbling to yourself you finally gripped it your back pocket. Pulling it out you let out a breath of relaxation only to groan when you flipped the top and realized it was empty.

“Mother fucker, I knew I was forgetting something. Stupid wine.” You sighed leaning against the wall.

Then you saw him. Standing a couple metres away, smoking a cigarette, you recognized the outfit, white button up with loose light wash jeans. You swear he was with your group, or at least a part of the half you met up with. So with the energy you could muster you pushed yourself off the wall, wrapping your arms around yourself and silently hyping yourself up.

Not fully paying attention to what he was taking about you wandered over. you patted his shoulder like a friend who hasn’t seen him in a while would. Smiling as he cut his sentence short, turning to look at you, smoke half way up to his mouth, big brown eyes staring at you as you smiled back.

“Hello good sir,” You mock bow, slightly stumbling towards the wall.

Fuck I swear I’m smoother than this. You thought to yourself.

You look back up at him and smile again as he subtly checks you out, probably wondering why a random drunk girl had wandered up to him.

“So funny thing. Chloe and Shelly made me come out tonight because work is fucked and max non stop texting me is fucked so they decided that I needed to come out and have a good time but my smart self forgot to get smokes before,” you flash him the empty pack with a pout. “And I was wondering because you know them apparently if I could steal a smoke off you.” You ramble, barely noticing his empty hand coming to steady you at your waist as you looked back up at him.

He had a smirk and for a second you wondered if he was apart of the group because you swear you would’ve remembered him, with his beautiful eyes, curly hair, and slight facial hair. Must’ve been one of the guys at the back.

“Uh yeah yeah, sure love, here yah go.” He handed you the lit half smoked cigarette for you to take a drag off of.

Jumping with excitement to finally have a sweet hit of nicotine you grabbed it from his fingers, your warm skin slightly rubbing against his cold fingers. You mock bowed again then took a long drag before blowing it up between the three of you.

“Fuck I’m so rude, I’m Y/N, Chloe didn’t introduce us. Not surprised that girl knows everyone.” You slurred, sticking your hand out for him and his friend to shake.

A moment of realization hit him and his friend, looking at each other as you took another drag before offering it back to him.

You thought they were someone else.

“Nice to meet you love, I’m Jamie and this is Joseph,” his friend gestured to himself then to the man at your side.

Joseph.

You quickly looked over his friend as Joseph grabbed the smoke from your hands. Longish blonde hair, sharp features, beautiful blue eyes. Damn you gotta give Chloe more credit, she sure knows how to get pretty people to be her friends.

“How’s your night been going?” Joseph asks you, turning more towards you as you lean on the wall, his hand slowly leaving your waist. Quickly grabbing his cigarette pack and offering you a full one as you fish for your lighter in your other pocket. Thanking him you took it and quickly lit it up, taking a full pull before exhaling.

“You’re a fucking lifesaver,” you flick the smoke. “It’s going, my feet hurt, and I have done enough shots to probably kill a small horse, but hey, at least I still remember my name. But you Joseph I’m curious about, how’s your night?”

“Could say the same, though I’m nowhere near as drunk as I want to be, this sap here,” he pointed to Jamie, you followed his hand looking at the sole ring on his finger before looking at Jamie. “Wanted to call his girlfriend to check in on her.”

“Oh that’s so cute, fuck I wish my boyfriend did that. All he did was cheat on me during night outs,” You rambled, not noticing how the two men slightly winced at the harshness of your voice, taking a puff and continuing. “Anyways, that’s why I’m out tonight because fuck that guy, you guys wanna do a shot with me?” You spoke quickly before losing your confidence.

“I would, but speaking of my girlfriend she’s almost here to get me but you can steal this man for the night I’m sure he wouldn’t mind.” Jamie winks at you. You giggle slightly, turning more towards Joseph and putting your hand on his chest.

“What do ya say josi? Wanna do a shot? Join me on my level?” You flirt, well you hope you’re flirting, if Chloe knows these guys you know they are used to good flirting.

Joseph laughs to himself, rubbing his thumb on his lip before dropping his cigarette and squishing it out.

“Finish that up and I’m all yours.” He winked at you while pointing at your now half a cigarette.

“Hell yeah, hope you are ready to party.” You drunkenly finish the smoke as Joseph says goodbye to Jamie.

Waving at Jamie as he walks down the street to meet his girlfriend, Joseph pushes himself off the wall to stand in front of you. You giggle slightly before dropping your cigarette and stamping out as he did before. Wiggling your eyebrows you stand to your full height, still a few inches shorter than him.

“You ready for the night of your life?”

“Do you worst darling.” He sticks his hand out for you to start leading him inside.

Another hour passes, filled with Joseph catching up with shots as you tried to keep your buzz at the same level. You had filled the time with talking and getting to know him, he told you about his week that was full of work, never really telling you what he did for work though. You told him about you too, about your job that honestly at this you point you just wanted to quit just so you didn’t have to see your bosses face anymore. Giggling and smiling at each other as you slowly inched closer around the table you were sitting at as you talked. Honestly you were a little peeved Chloe kept this man hidden for so long with how well you were getting along.

Suddenly you felt a weight on your back and the smell of Chloe’s sweet perfume.

“Y/N! There you are. Shelly said you went for a smoke and then you never came back! I thought you died!” She slurred into your ear, hanging off you.

“I’m good clo, met one of your friends outside.” You gestured to Joseph, who looked a little panicked as he sipped on the water bottle he grabbed for the both of you.

Chloe looked over at him, sizing him up for second before turning to you.

“Y/N babe, I don’t know who this is,” Chloe giggled. “though you do have the same style as our friend Scott.” She directed at him.

Joseph paled as you shook your head stopping for a second.

Oh fuck. Oh fuck OH FUCK

That’s why he looked familiar, Chloe’s friend Scott, Scott who wore almost the exact same outfit. Scott who you had only met once. Your eyes widened before you full on started laughing.

“Oh my god. I am so stupid,” you got up and leaned over Joseph, wrapping your arms around his shoulders as his hand came to sit at where they crossed. Leaning down you kissed the side of his head. “You are such a sweetheart, letting me have a cigarette when you don’t even know me.”

“Oh thank god I thought you were going to be mad, I’m sorry love. Didn’t know how to tell you I didn’t know your friend here when you told me about her dragging you out.” He breathlessly said into your ear and you leaned on him. You looked a Chloe and gave her a quick look of ‘get out of here ma’am’ before leaning back up and patting Joseph’s shoulder.

“Well charmer, we can either pretend this didn’t happen, or we can go back out for a smoke and see where the night takes us.” You say to him as he turns in his chair.

“How about this. We go for a smoke,” he hands you his pack as he stands. “And, I take you out on a date next week to apologize for not telling you I don’t know you.”

“You’ve got yourself a deal josi.”

[justabookworm39]

...So I was just gonna vaguely explain that this was inspired by (more the Vibes than the text itself of) a Traffic Life 'fic I wrote not long after Limited Life ended, but my siblings keep yelling at me to post writing here again so whatever.

Non-canon, based on random snippets of a fifth season idea, bread bird bad boys angst ft. Watcher!Grian and Canary!Jimmy. Warning: semi-graphic wing injury? It feels like it should be very brutal but the inspiration for those visuals was pulled from an E10 video game so IDK. Also light LimLife spoilers!

- - - <3 - - -

“Why are you doing this to him?”

Grian sits in the silence, staring off into space. It’s far from dawn and the rest of the server is either asleep or uninterested in bothering them. Their small fortification of cobblestone and acacia is filled with the smell of burning feathers, even an hour after the smoke cleared.

Jimmy lays on his stomach, breathing ragged, having basically passed out from pain and exhaustion when his wings had finished burning. There isn’t any plumage or muscle remaining, nothing left of them now except for two small spikes of bone; as if to remind everyone of what he lost.

He’d stumbled from his room in tears, screaming into his own hands while the flames licked at his back. He’d been chased by a burning feeling in his little yellow wings for a few days now, but this… this is a lot.

This is too much.

“I said—” Grian removes his hand from where it sits on Jimmy’s shoulder, feeling something powerful prickling beneath the skin of his fingers. “—why are you doing this to him?”

The thousands of beings surrounding him, somewhere outside of this reality, speak as one. “He didn’t want to be the canary anymore.” There was a sliver of barely-veiled smugness buried in that lone sentence, and Grian was surprised he didn’t snap right then and there.

“So?!” Grian jumps to his feet, spinning to face the faint outlines of purple crowding behind him. “Isn’t that what you want? If you want a show, why are you so uppity about him changing up the formula a bit? Why does he have to die first? Every! Time?!”

“Grian?”

His head jerks around. Jimmy has propped himself up and craned his neck, trying to stare at Grian through half-asleep eyes. “Who’re you talkin’ to?”

“Nobody.” Grian forces a smile. “I think you’re hearing things, go back to sleep.”

Jimmy doesn’t move, blinking up at Grian. Finally, he mumbles, “They did this to me, didn’t they?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Tim.” Grian feels his own insides boiling.

“They did this.” Jimmy turns over, curling his knees and hugging them against his chest. His voice gets louder with each word, even as those words get more frantic and his speech more clumsy. “They did this to me, why? What did I do to upset them— They hate me, I know they do, they just keep tormenting me, they— they pushed me, I swear I didn’t trip! You have to believe me boys, I didn’t trip, they pushed me—”

“Jimmy.” He feels his facade cracking and he barely pushes the gaps shut. He drops to his knees and grabs Jimmy’s shoulders. “Jimmy, go back to sleep, mate.”

Jimmy stares back at him, drenched in sweat, the ash of his burnt-up wings coating his back and clawing up his shoulders. His eyes reflect a special kind of fear, suddenly and brutally aware of the existence of something powerful and unknown that just wants to watch him bleed.

‘They pushed me.’

Why hadn’t Grian put it together at the time?

But Jimmy’s wrong. He hadn’t done anything to upset them. This is just the role they’d chosen for him.

“Jimmy.” Grian keeps his voice stunningly level, gently squeezing Jimmy’s arms, refusing to break eye contact. He feels something in the air—in his bones—shift, as he mutters one last time, “Go back to sleep.”

Jimmy’s eyes fall shut, and he slowly collapses against Grian’s chest. Grian lifts him, lays him back down on the cold hardwood floor and the pile of pillows that had been so much more comfortable than a bed while Jimmy had to feel his feathers and flesh burning away. Taking a nearby blanket, Grian drapes it over Jimmy’s lower body and tucks it around his waist, below the scorched remains of his wings.

Grian forces himself to his feet. He walks away, to his own bed. He takes his sword from the wall, slams the hilt into the mattress, and, with an overflowing of cosmic energy that sends ripples through reality and would likely drive anyone who saw half-mad, screams into his pillow.

3-2-2024

[plxviofiles]

this is a repost bc my dumbass deleted the original post I'm obsessed with her too dw 😭, also fun fact I didn't see the lighting bolt and initially wrote the reader with ice powers, but I changed it when I noticed I got it wrong 🧍‍♀️. I hope I did this prompt justice !! I just kinda wrote this really quickly bc I liked the prompt but I think I liked the way it turned out <3

---

Stupid Cupid (if you know this song ilysm *princess diaries flashbacks*)

#kate bishop x fem!reader, ft. yelena, clint, and natasha (my besties) (requests are open!!) WARNINGS: a swear word, reader is really clumsy with her lightning powers lmao 😭, bad jokes (you're welcome) A/N: italics are flashbacks! I AM BACK WITH ANOTHER KATE FIC as i should tbh #girlboss. I actually wanted to have 5 fics of her by now bc hawkeye- 5 eps- yk? ANYWAY. Idk what I wrote and I hope you like it <3. my dickinson reference 😋 (I keep referencing things I need to stop). also i'm gonna go watch nwh soon 😈 ! word count: 2.5K (so unlike me I know idk what's going on either) --- “Y/N!!” You ungracefully fall off your chair at the sudden shout from what sounded like your mentor. “Nat, it’s a Sunday!” you complain, yelling so she could hear you, “It’s technically an off day!” “And technically, as your mentor, I can kick your ass if you don’t come outside right now, so help me.” You sigh loudly, closing your book, leaving your phone on the bed, and you open the door. Natasha, with a very unamused glare was standing next to Yelena, your best friend, who was failing to hide her amused expression. “You’re such a mom,” you whine playfully, making Natasha glare even harder (if that was remotely possible). “Why are you disturbing me?” and when you see steam coming out of Natasha’s ears, you immediately correct yourself, “Is there something you need me to do?” “We’re meeting someone new,” Natasha said simply, and Yelena nodded, taking a random grape out of her vest and eating it, “I think you’d really like her.”

It’s like your puppy mode was activated, your ears twitching, eyes sparkling, and adrenaline pumping, “A GIRL?”

Natasha looks like she regretted saying so, “A girl. Now come on, you’re delaying everyone.”

You burst out of the room and jog to the avengers’ compound entrance, Yelena and Natasha following you from behind.

“She’s like a puppy,” Natasha mumbles, taking a packet of m&ms out of Yelena’s vest, and Yelena nods, “She IS a puppy.”

You see the new girl already surrounded by the boys, no doubt interrogating her, or just being excited to see her.

Sam notices you trying to catch a glimpse of the girl, “Hey, guys move away, y/n wants to greet her.”

The sea of men parts for you and you got a bunch of ruffling of hair, pats on the back, and hellos, before finally being face-to-face with the girl.

She was facing her back towards you, talking to Clint.

Clint sees you and tells Kate to turn around.

Both of you lock gazes and your smile widens. She’s really pretty.

Kate’s smile mirrors your own when Clint introduces you.

“Kate, this is y/n, Natasha’s mentee, and y/n, this is Kate, my-“

“Partner slash best friend,” Kate intervenes, not looking away from you.

“Mentee,” Clint corrects, shaking his head, “She’s around your age too.”

“Hi!” you hold out your hand, and Kate shakes it vigorously, “I like your bow.”

“Oh my god, thank you,” Kate responds enthusiastically, “What’s with the burnt patch on your clothes? It looks new. Did you burn yourself?”

She was referring to your shirt, now partly burnt to a crisp, and you shake your head, “Well yes, but no, I mean- I’m an electrokinetic meaning I have electrical-based powers, so.”

Kate nods, “So you’re kinda like Zeus.”

You laugh vociferously, “Exactly! Except I don’t sleep around as much as he does,” you joke, making her laugh.

The avengers watch your interaction with a smile, already knowing that the both of you put together would be instant chaos.

And they were right.

Within a day, you and Kate were practically best friends (which Yelena complained about, but you constantly reassured her that she was like a sister to you).

Clint and Natasha had a blast, since both of you liked each other, they decided to train the both of you together, which saved a lot of time (and more time for the two to go drinking together).

Days, weeks, months, passed, and Yelena, Kate, and you were like the chaotic trio NO one asked for.

A million stupid activities, like acting you were married to try wedding cake samples for free, playing laser tag with actual lasers, balancing apples on people’s heads for Kate to shoot them off with arrows (there were many complaints for that one), accidentally adopting 5 cats (don’t ask).

It was all fun and games, but it usually ended with you and Kate getting “grounded,” and Yelena getting away because she ALWAYS has a way out.

You didn’t mind though, it just meant spending more time with Kate, who never failed to make your day better.

“I’M SORRY!”

“HOW THE FUCK DID YOU PUT THE BLUE HAIR DYE IN MY SHAMPOO BOTTLE AND NOT NATASHA’S?”

You were chasing Kate across the compound, the brunette screaming bloody murder, and you trying to avoid using your powers.

“YOU KNOW WHAT?”

You raised your hand, summoning your powers, and a minor bolt of lightning struck one of Kate’s feet, making her fall flat on the ground.

“Fuck,” Kate groans, and you stalk over to her patting her on the head and smugly smirking, “Thanks for playing.”

“What are you guys doing now,” Yelena complains, her room door opening as she yawns, “You dimwits woke me up from my nap.”

Then Yelena takes one look at your hair, and bursts out laughing, so loud, that Natasha and Clint came running.

“What’s wrong?” Natasha looks around hastily before spotting the two of you on the ground, “Oh.”

Clint just tries not to laugh, and Yelena gestures between you and Natasha, “She looks just like you when you were a kid, sestra!”

Natasha smiles crookedly, ruffling your hair and sighing, “Clean up guys, training in 10.”

Kate and you prepare to complain before Clint shot you pointed looks, “Yes, Natasha.”

They leave and so does Yelena, claiming she needed more “beauty sleep” and you pick up the strands of your hair, frowning.

“I’m sorry.”

Kate looked genuinely afraid that you were upset with her, “It’s nothing.”

“You seemed angry though.”

“But I’m not. I could never stay angry with you for long.”

“Really?” Her eyes shot up to look into yours, and it felt like déjà vu was slapping you in the face.

“Yeah,” your voice is weak, straining.

“You look pretty, by the way.”

“Thanks.”

You hear her mission went wrong.

You don’t even pay attention to anyone else, as you ignored the calls from the rest of the team, rushing to your friend’s room.

You knocked frantically.

“Katie?”

A few seconds later, the door opens, and you meet her sad expression.

“My poor baby,” you joke lightheartedly, wrapping your arms around her body, pulling her close, and using your foot to push the door closed.

Kate buries her face in your shoulder, breathing heavily, and you rub her back in calming circles.

“I messed up.”

You hate hearing her sound this vulnerable. So different from the bubbly girl she always was.

One thing some people failed to see, was that Kate Bishop, was not always the joker, the one who can take everyone and everything on with a confident smile.

She was just like everyone else, with feelings, worries, insecurities.

You pull her closer.

“Everyone messes up. You’re not alone.”

Kate shuts her eyes tightly.

You feel like you’re the only one who gets to see her this way.

“What if I always mess up?”

You contemplate your next words, knowing that there’s no right way to comfort someone.

Especially when it’s someone you love.

“Then I’ll be there to help you clean up. Every single time.”

Kate’s ragged breaths slowly stabilise, and she detaches herself from your, her arms still around your neck.

“You really are my favourite person in the world.”

Maybe it’s the way she looks at you.

The way her touch makes more goosebumps appear on your skin more than any lightning bolt.

The way she words things.

“I love you more than words can say.”

“They SO like each other.”

“Clint, there’s no way,” Natasha replies exasperatedly.

“Look, can you just accept that I’m right and you’re wrong for once?”

“No.”

“Fine,” Clint pulls his best friend’s arm and leads her to the kitchen, “I’ll prove it to you.”

He looks around like he’s in a mission, and Natasha rolls her eyes.

He gestures for her to follow his movements, peeking in the kitchen.

Natasha places her head below his, peeking as well.

It seems normal at first, just you and Kate in the kitchen, in your usual morning routine.

But then it’s like you were unconsciously making each other’s light breakfast before training, like you knew exactly what the other wanted, and silently at that.

You grabbed the bowl and slid it towards Kate, who took a cup out and slid it towards you. You grabbed two spoons and she grabbed the sugar and cereal. You placed a spoon in her bowl and a spoon in your teacup, while Kate dropped tea bags into it. You poured cereal into her bowl as Kate fills your cup with hot water.

Natasha watches the whole exchange with a surprised expression, while Clint just smugly smiles from above her.

“See? I’m right,” he whispers, near to Natasha’s ear.

“Stop breathing down my neck,” Natasha grits her teeth, slapping the man’s leg.

“No, you stop breathing down my neck.”

“That doesn’t even make sense!”

“No, you don’t make sense.”

Soon, they start bickering, and when Clint starts getting a little too loud, Natasha grabs him away from the entrance.

You sip your cup of tea, and look around, thinking you heard something.

“Did you hear that?” you ask Kate, who smiles at you and shakes her head, “Nope.”

“I thought I heard like, really loud whispering,” you murmur, and Kate snorts, “You’re just tripping.”

“You’re so annoying.”

“You’re annoying -er.”

“That isn’t even a word.”

Kate sticks her tongue out at you, and you reciprocate childishly.

Natasha hears everything and sighs in relief, “They didn’t hear us.”

Clint nods seriously, “No, they didn’t.”

Then, he jumps in front of Natasha and starts doing a ridiculous victory dance, “I was right, you were wrong. I was right, you were wrong.”

Natasha curses him in Russian, “So what now?”

Clint’s brows furrow, “What?”

“We can’t just leave them like that,” Natasha places a hand on her chin, thinking, “We have to do something.”

“Oh, so now we’re matchmakers.”

“Shut up and help me think.”

Clint agrees to work on Kate, and Natasha agrees to work on you.

They both have different approaches, determined to make this work.

“You know, you and y/n are meant to be together.”

Kate freezes in the mario kart game, looking to Clint in awe, as he continues racing.

“I’m sorry, what?”

“You and y/n would be great together.”

Kate chokes on air, and Clint glances at her knowingly.

“N-No, I’m pretty sure you got it wrong,” Kate chuckles awkwardly, “We’re just friends.”

“So, friends just sleepover at each other’s room every day, makes each other breakfast and knows exactly what the person wants without asking, excessively touches the other person and exchanges hugs and kisses randomly, gets a little grumpy whenever the other person gets a date-“

Kate pauses the game, “FINE. Fine, you’re right,” she confirms miserably.

Clint puts his controller down, “Then why do you sound so sad about it?”

“I just don’t think she likes me that way,” Kate fiddles with the joystick, “She’s always so good to me, and I can’t help but feel like whatever this is, is all in my head.”

Clint nods in understanding, “I think you’re wrong though.”

“About what?”

“She does like you that way.”

Natasha opens your door without a knock, and you were on your bed, reading a book, and not bothering to look up, “Natasha.”

Natasha smirks, “You’re getting more alert, that’s good.”

“No, it’s just that you’re the only one who opens my room door without knocking,” you correct her, closing your book, “Well, you and Yelena, but she makes sure to pounce on my bed the second she comes in and is always asleep during this time of day.”

Natasha narrows her eyes, “Touche.”

“I learned from the best.”

She holds out two tickets to the movies.

“You want to watch a movie with me?” you seem confused, “Look, I’m all for milfs, and you are really pretty, but-“

“God, you really are an idiot,” Natasha pinches her nose bridge, “Clint and I wanted to go, but we both happened to be busy so.”

She places the tickets in your hands, and you stare at them blankly.

“You can bring whoever you want,” Natasha emphasizes each word without sounding too suspicious.

“Right,” you mutter, already knowing who you wanted to bring.

Natasha crosses her fingers, hoping you wouldn’t be a dumbass and just make a move, “Enjoy.”

You make your way to Kate’s room, rehearsing in your mind how you wanted to ask her out. This was so much harder than you imagined it to be. Kate was just this perfect girl.

You didn’t notice Kate heading in your direction, also focused on something else.

Before you knew it, you bumped into her, and managed to grab her arms before she fell.

“Sorry,” you wince, and she just brushes herself off, her cheeks flushing for no apparent reason, “It’s no problem.”

Then the awkward silence. Something was definitely wrong. Silence was never awkward between you two.

“Was there anything you wanted to tell me?” you spoke up, hiding the tickets behind your back, “You looked pretty determined and you seemed to be heading to my room.”

Kate blinks, “Yeah! Yeah, I just wanted to, uh-“

You gather up enough courage to suddenly hold the tickets in front of you, right in her face.

Kate stares at it.

“Do you wanna go out with me?” you ask quickly, “Like on a date. God, I’m embarrassing myself aren’t I?”

At first glance, you might not have appeared that nervous, but Kate notices the electric sparks on your fingers, the air smelling slightly of ozone.

“Y-You’re asking me?” Kate stutters characteristically.

“Yes,” you weakly respond, “We don’t have to talk about this right now but, I just really like you and I want to take you out on a date.”

Kate’s knees felt like they were about to give out, and a grin slowly appears on her face, “I would love to.”

“Great! Great, yeah, um, I’ll pick you up at 7?”

“If you mean you’ll meet me at my door at 7, then yes.”

The movie date goes well, and you come back with matching smiles, holding each other’s hands.

Clint and Natasha were already waiting at the entrance, and she whispers to him, “Do you think it worked?”

“I mean, they’re holding hands.”

“They’re always holding hands.”

“Good point.”

The happy couple approaches them, and the mentors hold their breath.

“They played cupid didn’t they?” Kate asks you once you reached them.

“I mean, I probably wouldn’t have had the guts to ask you out if it weren’t for Natasha.”

“And I probably wouldn’t have acknowledged my feelings for you if it weren’t for Clint.”

“Which means you should be thanking us,” Clint says excitedly, nudging Natasha as if she weren’t standing next to him and seeing exactly what was happening, “We worked very hard you know.”

“I did the thinking,” Natasha cuts in with very important information.

“Thank you, I guess,” you rub the back of your neck, and Kate snorts.

“What’s so funny, Bishop?”

“Want me to tell them about how you summoned lightning and burnt our chairs because you were so nervous when I kis-“

“STOP.”

[mysticaldeanvoidhorse]

A Supernatural Love

Chapter Twenty Four: A Wedding

Summary:  Y/N, a nurse working towards medical school living with her roommate and best friend Genevieve Cortese, meets Jensen Ackles while visiting the set of Supernatural one day.  Is this chance encounter a coincidence or fate?  And if it is fate, do they have what it takes to make it through separations and hardships?

Slow(ish) burn, some angst, alluding to sexy times, fluff

Pairings: Jensen x Reader

Warnings: Bad writing, Some swearing, alluding to sexy times, fluff

Word Count: 2147

No hate to any of the real people in this story, it is purely fiction and for enjoyment! No images are mine

First fic I wrote, please be kind but open to feedback, both positive and negative!

Tag List:  @streets-in-paradise​​​  @leigh70​​​ @sexyvixen7​​​​  @deandreamernp​​​​  @universallyraylangivens​​​​  @siospins2 ​​​ @let-me-luve-you ​​​​ @lyarr24 ​​​ @nancymcl  @hobby27 ​​​ @fiftyshadesgrl

Tag list open

Masterlist here

     A year had gone by, and it went quickly.  You were helping Gen plan her wedding, improving your career, and growing your new, yet old relationship with Jensen.  He stayed another week and pushed off starting filming as long as he could.  He wanted to prove to you that he meant what he said but eventually you had to kick him out saying that he couldn’t put everything on hold for you though you were flattered that he would have.  You both traveled back and forth as much as you could, though it wasn’t often but you could call, text, and facetime.  This time around you had a better foundation that wasn’t built on a bubble and you both had matured a lot.  Gen was so happy for you and you both talked in great detail about this new development. It was fun to be able to giggle like a schoolgirl in love again.

     The year went quickly with that, and you didn’t have James anymore, as he moved to Houston to be closer to Dee.  They had started their own relationship and they were doing well from what it seemed, though no one kept in real contact with them anymore.  But that was okay, you had Jensen.  After spending all your free time to help Gen with the wedding, you went over to Mama Ackles a few times per her insistence.  She was elated that you and her “idiot son” finally got back together.  It was “about time”;  You didn’t disagree.  On one of these Saturday mornings you had spent with her out on the porch, she had asked when you and Jensen were going to tie the knot.

“I don’t know about that, we still need to figure out how we are doing long distance.”  You told her.

“You told me four years ago that you wanted to marry my son.”  She insisted.

“And nothing has changed.  But we fu- screwed up last time and I don’t want anything to ruin what we have now.”

“Sweetie, you both would die for each other.  You are making the distance work and though it is hard, you have a solid foundation and neither is going anywhere.”  She told you.  “The only thing stopping either of you is that you are scared.  I don’t know why you are anyway, seeing as how much you love each other.”

“You are right as always Mama.  There is no reason to be scared.  I have made peace with what happened and I guess I am only nervous because with all this wedding planning, ironically we haven’t talked about weddings at all.”  You told her.

“You know Jensen wants to marry you.  You just need to grow your own pair and talk it out.”  She told you frankly.  You loved how she was so bold when you needed her to be.  You walked into the house with a smile on your face and when you walked into the kitchen you almost dropped your mug.

“Careful love, we don’t want that glass flying everywhere”  Jensen smirked at you.

“Jensen!”  You practically squealed as you rushed into his arms after setting down the mug carefully.  “What are you doing here?  You aren’t supposed to be here for another week!”  

“If you would stop squeezing me so hard, maybe I could tell you.”  Always the sarcastic one.

“Whatever, I don’t even care”  Two could play that game.  As you turned to leave, he twisted you around planting a firm kiss on your lips.  It was a good thing he was holding on so tightly otherwise you would have been knocked to the floor.  You loved that he still made you so weak in the knees, as cliche as it was.

“Don’t hold out on that lovin’ I won’t make it”  He told you with seriousness but love in his voice.

“What are you doing here, Jens?”

“I wanted to surprise you.”  He said with a smile.

“It’s a good surprise.  Maybe we can actually spend time together since Gen has every minute planned up until they say ‘I do’.”  He leaned in and whispered in your ear.

“I know exactly what we can do.”  He nibbled on your ear a little and you turned beet red.  Normally you wouldn’t have minded but with his parents in the room, you didn’t exactly want them to know your “plans”.

“Oh you kids, get out of here”  Mama said.  “I barely was able to keep the surprise.  Jensen, take this girl out.”  She hugged him then shooed him out of the house.

“Guess she wants us to have a good time.”  He wiggled his eyebrows at you causing you to roll your eyes.

“At least buy me dinner first.”  You teased.  He grabbed your hand and kissed it as you walked towards his truck.

“Yes Ma’am.”

      The week went by quickly and you got to spend a lot of quality time together that you needed.  Now it was time to help with last minute wedding stuff.  Jared wanted to have it in Dallas so his, hers, and Jensen’s parents wouldn’t have to travel too far.  They also had a house nearby that they bought recently and they wanted to be able to ‘play house’ before he would have to go back to Vancouver to film.   The whole cast was flying in and you were excited to meet some of the new members that you had only seen through facetime with Jensen.  Though you were excited, he didn’t seem to like the fact that he would have to share you.  You liked when he would get possessive but you also reminded him that you ‘could do what you damn well wanted and he would just have to be okay with that’.  He agreed but he made it known he would do the same, and by the same, he made up for all the lost time you had to spend apart…

     “Oh there you are, where have you been?”  Gen frantically said as you entered the building where they were decorating for the reception.

“Gen, I am fifteen minutes early. Take a deep breath, nothing is going to happen.  Everything is perfect.”  You told her.  After a few breaths she seemed to calm down.

“I just want everything to go well.”  She told you.

“And it will.  Besides, the wedding isn’t even the best part.  The marriage is the best part where you get to spend the rest of your lives together.  You and Jared are a real life fairy tale.”  And you weren’t wrong.

      After spending a few hours helping to set up and helping Gen in any way you could, as you were finishing a table setting, you felt strong arms wrap around your waist.  You smiled and rested your head against the strong shoulder.

“Hi Y/N”  He whispered into your hair.

“Hi baby.  You better let go before my boyfriend shows up”  You teased.  He only tightened his hold on you.

“Oh sweetheart, I could take him any day.  Besides, I want to show everyone you’re mine.”  You turned around and put your hands around his strong shoulders.

“I don’t think he would like that very much.”  You said, pretending to be serious.

“I don’t care what he wants.”  With that his mouth was on yours, capturing your lips in a sweet yet possessive kiss.  You would have loved to stay there all day but then Jared walked in.

“Hey break it up you guys, this is my weekend.”  He shot Jensen a wink then went to find Gen.

“If you keep kissing me like that, I won’t care what my boyfriend thinks either.”  You smiled seductively up at him.   He smirked then pecked your lips again.  He grabbed your hand then went to where Jared and Gen were.  You liked that he always felt the need to touch you somehow.

“Hey Gen, how are you feeling?  It’s not too late to change your mind.”  Jensen said.

“Hey, dude, I thought you were on my side!”  Jare shoved him in the arm.

“Thanks for the offer but I think I am going to keep this one.”  Gen said with a smile.  Jared leaned down and kissed her sweetly.  You just grabbed Jensen’s arm with your hand and continued to hold his hand as you leaned against his shoulder.

“Alright enough of this, let’s get this rehearsal started.”  Jensen said, pretending to be annoyed, but squeezing your hand tighter.

      The rehearsal went off without a hitch and then it was already the big day.  You had gotten up extremely early and had spent the whole day getting ready with the bridal party.  Gen was absolutely glowing and you giggled like school girls about it. You were so happy for your friend.  She deserved this.

“Thank you so much for being my maid of honor Y/N.  I hope you get engaged soon.”  Gen grabbed your hand as best she could since she was in her chair while another bridesmaid was curling her hair.

“I don’t know about that.  Jensen and I talked about it but I don’t think it is in the near future.  We are still figuring out how to navigate the long distance thing.”

“Do you not want him to propose?”  She seemed very concerned.

“Of course I do but I am not getting my hopes up.  When it happens, I will have no doubt in my mind of saying yes but I don’t know if he wants that yet.”  She chuckled.

“Oh Y/N,  he has wanted that since the first day he saw you on set.”  You rolled your eyes and blushed as you remembered that wonderful day so long ago.

     All too soon, it was time to line up.  Since Jensen was the best man you would be walking down the aisle together.  You liked that.  When you rounded the corner, you made eye contact with Jensen and his mouth dropped.  You couldn’t help but blush knowing the reason why he was so surprised.

“Wow you look amazing.”  Jensen said, grabbing the hand without flowers in it.

“You clean up pretty good yourself Ackles.”  He kissed your forehead and wrapped your hand in his arm.

“You ready?”

“Just don’t let me fall.”

“Never”  He held you close to his side.  “Just think, it’ll be us next”  You looked up at him.  He showed no signs of hesitation or joking.

“You still have to ask me, Jens”  You looked ahead at the unopened doors.

“Oh trust me, I will.”  You didn’t have time to respond, but you smiled as the doors flew open and he led you to the altar.

      The ceremony went amazing and you cried.  The vows were so sweet and you loved seeing Jared choked up with tears as he couldn’t contain his love for Gen.  You looked past him to Jensen and he was smiling looking at you.  The reception was fun as well, food, speeches, dancing.  You had a heartfelt speech to Gen, balancing it with a healthy dose of cringe about her and Jared’s first few months together.  Jensen gave his speech with many jokes about their shenanigans, about how lucky Gen settled for him, etc.  By the time the dancing rolled around, your heart was full.  A few fun dances, and slow dances with Jensen flew by and Gen was going to do her bouquet toss.  You weren’t going to line up on the floor but Jensen urged you to go.  Hesitant to release his hand, you trudged to the floor and somehow got pushed to the front.  Gen gave you a wink and as she turned around to throw it, she turned back around and handed it to you.  You were shocked.  You didn’t know that would happen or why but you just smiled and thanked her.  Before you could hug her, Jensen came out of nowhere and sheepishly smiled at you until he reached you.  He immediately knelt down and your eyes grew wide and a hand shot to your mouth.  The crowd wasn’t silent but you tuned them out as you had zeroed in on Jensen.  

“I love you so much Y/N.  You deserve the world and I want to spend the rest of my life proving that to you.  Will you make me the happiest man on earth and marry my sorry ass?”  He had opened the velvet box to show a beautiful ring.  Shiny, full of diamonds, and just what you had wanted.  You could only assume Gen had helped pick it out.  

“Yes, yes of course I will marry you!”  You squealed while crying and he got up from his knees to wrap you in the biggest hug.  Everyone cheered and clapped.  You cried as he put the ring on your finger and kissed you like it was the last time.  But you knew it wasn’t the last, but the beginning of forever.