#i suq at ask box

[rickfucker]

i know i said it before but i’ll say it again

RICK BEING 6’5 WITH LARGE ASS HANDS WHEN I SAY I WOULD GIVE THIS MAN THE SLOPPIEST TOP THAT HIS ORTHOPAEDIC SHOES WOULD FALL OVER I MEAN IT 🔊🔊🔊🔊

SORRY ANON I AGREE!!!!! we signal boost that sloppy toppy!!!!!!!

[jooheonies]

Monsta X In Ikea

Masterlist

Hyunwoo (Shownu):

doesnt even want to be here

minhyuk told him they were just going on a drive and dragged him in

too many things going on

overwhelmed™

picks a display and sits there the whole time while minhyuk runs around

sat there for so long ppl thought he was a mannequin and everyone freaked out when he stood up

Hoseok (Wonho):

only there for the meatballs

didnt even take the long maze through ikea to get there

just took the elevator

almost cried when a kid there smiled and waved at him

actually cried when he tried to take the maze through the displays and got lost

called his mom to come find him

an actual baby

Minhyuk:

has his map, pencil, and list

reADY 2 GO

Got sidetracked by the smol plants

“Look how smol, hyunwoo i waNT IT”

skips around and nearly topples over all the diplays

runs back and forth in the store to show Hyunwoo all the cool, unnecessary things they can get

“but i need all these fairy lights!”

Kihyun:

“why is there so muCH TO DO?”

tries to pronounce all the names

fucks up really bad but enunciates everything so he rubs it in Minhyuk’s face

sticks pretty well to his list of things, but can’t decide between all the options

“do i want the white six shelf horizontal stand or the black eight shelf vertical stand?”

makes jooheon push him in those giant flatbed cart things

makes “beep beep!” noises to get people out of the way

“sir, you’re 23 years old pls sTOP”

Hyungwon:

tries out all the beds and sofas

also rates the duvets

“hmm this one is soft but doesn’t quite have enough plushness’

also rates how soft the sofa pillows are

started talking out loud and people began asking him to help out in picking the right sofa

“it’s great in color, but not the best for the butt”

fell asleep in the beds one too many times and got banned

it’s ok bc he has all of the duvets at home, he just likes trying out beds

still stares when he drives by

Jooheon:

didn’t follow the floor arrows and is now circling the lamps section, trying to act like he isn’t freaking out

wigs out in the kids section and touches all those paper ball things hanging from the ceiling

buys a lot of unnecessary things

like?? that’s stupid jooheon u dont need plates in pink and red and black and white

“but i like the colors!!! I cant pick!!”

crawls into one of the sink cabinets to see if he can if

he can

but now he’s stuck and the ikea employees have to call the fire department to get the grown ass man out of their bathroom display

Changkyun (I.M):

sits in the giant box of dinos in the kids section and names them all

took the paper meter stick things at the entrance and made a fort w them

tied them to the shelves in the back where most employees dont go

he lives here now

occasionally ventures out to the restaurant and just takes a pudding cup

that’s all

he goes back to his fort after that

they find out nine weeks later and find him sitting on his ass in the middle of eight hundred plastic pudding cups

“hi do u have any other pudding flavors? im getting sick of this one”

A/N: Ya done fucked up, kinza goddamn. the only one that makes any sense is changkyun thiS IS A MESS IM SORRY TO THE ANON THAT ASKED FOR THIS I SUQ

[wkakadrac]

Work in Progress: Zakhara for 5E

I’ve had to scrap a lot of my prior work re: Adapting Al-Qadim content for 5th Edition due to major balancing, overlap, and / or over-complication issues. Progress continues to be made, if a fair deal slower, so expect me to release a bunch of posts on the matter eventually.

That said, I’ve also begun work on an Plane Shift:Zendikar-esque primer for people interested in running games in the Land of Fate. Below is what I’ve currently completed, with the main things I still need to include / write out being:

1) A proper geographic summary of Zakhara

2) The differences between the Al-Badia (nomadic) and Al-Hadhar (settled) demographics

3) A rundown of the Cities of the Ancient

4) A theological tl;dr of Zakhara’s predominant faith(s) / deities

5) Some suggestions on how to apply existing Background options to the Zakhara setting.

If all goes well the rough draft should be complete by today, at which point I can try slapping it down in the DM’s Guild by Wednesday for feedback. If anyone has any critique, commentary, desired additions, or so-on, my Ask Box and Replies are always open. Bear in mind that some thematic aspects of the AD&D2E setting will be omitted to keep the adaptation in line with modern Wizards / 5E design principles, leaving DMs who further research the subject free to decide whether they want to include such themes / content or not.

"There is no Fate but the Fate which we are given." -Zakharan proverb

Introduction Dungeons and Dragons has a rich history of official campaign settings stretching back over a span of four decades and five editions. A treasure trove of inspiration for Dungeon Masters seeking to add something unique to their campaign, this document offers a brief look at one of the more frequently acknowledged - but rarely focused upon - backdrops of the Abeir-Toril setting: Zakhara.

Released as "Al-Qadim: Arabian Adventures" back in 1992 for Advanced Dungeons & Dragons 2nd Edition, the setting of Zakhara was in some regards a prototype of the modern Dungeons & Dragon world. It featured some of the first official Dungeons & Dragons material to separate a creature's race from a universal archetype or nature, introduced several monsters that have gone to become staples in modern Monstrous Manuals, and made extensive use of class kits whose designs were closer to modern class archetypes than they were the usual AD&D 2nd Edition kits. At the same time, it was - and still is - a world of its own, drawing inspiration heavily from arabic history and mythology both pre- and post-Islam as well as contemporary (at-the-time) pop culture invoking to the same subjects.

Pushed to the wayside during the 3rd and 4th Editions of Dungeons and Dragons, the setting was brought back to the attention of Dungeons and Dragons players with the release of the Sword Coast Adventurer's Guide in late 2015. Teasing readers with hints of the distant land, it is my hope that this document will further kindle that spark of curiosity and inspiration within players and dungeon masters alike.

Zakhara: The Land of Fate "Far to the south of Faerún, beyond Calimshan and even the jungles of Chult, are the Lands of Fate. Surrounded by waters thick with pirates and corsairs, Zakhara is a place less hospitable than most, but still braved by travelers who hope to profit from its exotic goods and strange magics. Like Kara-Tur, Zakhara seems a world away to Faerúnians. It is thought of as a vast desert, sprinkled with glittering cities like scattered gems. Romantic tales abound of scimitar-wielding rogues riding flying carpets and of genies bound in service to humans. Their mages, called sha'ir, practice their magic with the aid of geneies and, it is said, might carry the lineage of these elemental beings in their blood." - Sword Coast Adventurer's Guide

"Zakhara is a world of extremes. Travelers may cross a seemingly endless sea of dunes, cresting wave after wave, and then suddenly find an oasis as lush as any imagined paradise. They may climb snow-capped mountains that soar above 15,000 feet, or discover the deadly Pit of the Ghuls, whose murky depths plug well below the level of the distant sea." - Adventurer's Guide to Zakhara

Provide a quick overview of the overall geography and major differences from the north. The expansive deserts that define its more iconic Western lands and the lush jungles clinging to its Eastern shores. The preponderance of Genies and other Elemental kin and relative absence of many traditional beasts such as Dragons. How its gods defy the common northern conventions of belonging to any one race or sub-race in either worship or form.

>Al-Badia & Al-Hadhar< Use this section to highlight the two (broad) lifestyles of Zakhara: Al-Badia (Nomadic) and Al-Hadhar (Settled)

>Domains Within Zakhara< Offer a brief summary of the following reaches:

>>Cities of the North<< The northernmost polities of Zakhara, closest to the Great Sea and Faerún. Major cities include Hawa (practical capital to the Corsair Domains), Qudra (Huzuz's most firm grip on the region), and the so-called Free Cities of Hafayah, Liham, Muluk, Qadib, Umara, and Utaqa: Relatively independent city-states as well as the most common destination of foreign visitors and merchants to the Land of Fate.

>>Cities of the Heart<< The geographic and political heartland of Zakhara, located along the fertile stretches of land bordering Suq Bay and its tributaries. Here lay Huzuz, seat of the Master of the Enlightened Throne and peer to Waterdeep in both size and grandeur. Other major cities include Halwa, Hiyal, and Wasat.

>>Cities of the Pearl<< The chief economic financiers of Zakhara, located along the Western shores of the Golden Gulf and Crowded Sea. While its cities - Ajayib, Gana, Jumlat, Sikak, and Tajar - are among the wealthiest in Zakhara, only Jumlat and Gana actually produce pearls in noteworthy quantities. The rest make do with othervaluable exports, including rare metals, spices, woods, and other exotic wares.

>>Cities of the Pantheon<< The spiritual heartland of Zakhara, situated along the Eastern shores of the Golden Gulf and Crowded Sea. Here one will find the most pious and stringent adherents to Enlightenment in the form of the Pantheist League, though the form this piety takes sometimes varies greatly between members. Major cities include Fahhas, Hilm, Hudid, I'tiraf, Mahabba, and Talab.

>>Cities of the Ancients<< The

Races of Zakhara Ostensibly, humans are the dominant race within the Land of Fate. They are by far both the most populous and most widespread of its inhabitants, and it is with their city-states that those outside of the realm most frequently interact with. No other nation within the Land of Fate comes close in either size or breadth to that pledged to the Enlightened Throne.

In practice, however, the division of power is highly complex. Many settlements disproportionately include nonhuman races among their seats of soft and / or hard power. Genies and their kin frequently serve as advisors and generals to the mortal leaders of the Land of Fate, with many more wandering its vast wilderness in pursuit of their own agendas. In the East villainous Yak-Men operate with nigh-impunity from their stronghold within World Pillar Mountains, and in the south the jungles of the Haunted Lands yield only the most tenuous of grips to its recent Zakharan occupiers.

Nonhuman races account for approximately ten percent of the total population in most Zakharan settlements, this number trending closer to fifteen or even twenty percent within more cosmopolitan cities such as Qudra and Hiyal while the cities of the Pantheist League rarely surpass more than a five percent nonhuman demographic on their official census'. The predominant nonhuman races found in major cities include - but are not limited to - elves, half-elves, dwarves, halflings, gnomes, orcs, half-orcs, genasi, kobolds, ogres, goblins, hobgoblins, hill giants, lizardfolk, and gnolls, with coastal settlements often including communities of merfolk and locathah as well.

To outsiders looking in, Zakharan society can appear almost alien or even mad. Dwarves laughing alongside kobolds and hill giants at a city's dock as they wait to unload their final vessel of the day. Lizardfolk in suits of maile standing watch as an ogre in fine clothes supervises the closing of their shop. Gnolls kneeling alongside elf and human as the sound of prayer bells echoes through a caravanserai. But to natives of the Land of Fate, this melting pot of various races and origins comes as naturally as the rising of the sun or the stages of the moon. And while it would be inaccurate to say that race has no bearing whatsoever, it is ultimately how one acts - what values they come to honor and exemplify - that is most important within Zakhara.

Faiths of Zakhara Use this section to give a brief rundown of The Loregiver, Enlightenment, and the local divines. Also mention Kahin (Idol-Priests) and the Temple of Ten Thousand Gods. Only deities marked with an asterix (*) are viewed as proper deities within the Pantheist League.

>Zakharan Deities<

Deity;      Ideal;    Symbol Bala of the Tidings;  Music;    A zither *Hajama the Courageous;    Bravery;   A featureless disk Hakiyah of the Sea Breezes;   Honesty, Truth;  A cresting wave Haku, Master of the Desert Wind;   Freedom, Independence;  A stylized gust of wind *Jauhar the Gemmed;    Wealth;   A gold dinar Jisan of the Floods;    Fruitfulness;   A rain cloud *Kor the Venerable;  Wisdom;   A sunburst *Najm the Adventurous;    Adventure, Curiosity;  A single arrow pointed upward *Selan the Beautiful Moon;   Beauty;   A ringed moon Vataqatal the Warrior-Slave;   War, Duty;   A red-bladed sword Zann the Learned;    Intelligence, Learning; A fountain's jet

Player Backgrounds

>NEW BACKGROUNDS< Desert Rider Oft traveling beyond the outskirts of society, you have spent nearly as much of your life in the saddle as you have on your own two feet. Whether you hail from one of the many nomadic tribes who eek out a living in Zakhara's unforgiving wilderness, delivered messages or goods between distant city-states and villagers, or sought to put your past as far behind you physically as it was chronologically, you have learned not only the art of survival but how best to handle and care for your steed in the most tumultuous of situations.

Skill Proficiencies: Animal Handling, Survival Tool Proficiencies: One type of musical instrument. Languages: One of your choice. Equipment: Your steed, a pack or riding saddle, a set of common clothes, a worn but functional tent, and 5 gp.

Trusty Steed Well suited for desert environments, Camels remain the traditional mount of choice for Desert Riders hailing from the Land of Fate. Be that as it may, adventurers are rarely a traditional lot and hail from a wide variety of sizes, cultures, lands, and circumstances. Should you prefer a different mount, discuss with your DM possible alternatives to choose from. Potential steeds should generally be of 50GP value or less, or - in the case of creatures without a given market value - 1/4 CR or lower. Example alternatives from a Desert environment include several breeds of Draft Horses, Giant Lizards, and - in the case of Small riders - Giant Wolf Spiders.

Feature: Born in the Saddle So long as you are not incapacitated, you have advantage on saving throws made to avoid falling off your mount and grant your mount advantage on Wisdom saving throws against being charmed or frightened. Furthermore, so long as you remain within 30' of your mount, you may treat their exhaustion level as one point lower than it actually is. Thus a steed with one level of exhaustion does not suffer from Disadvantage on their ability checks, while a steed with two levels can still move at its full movement rate.

Matrud You did not always live on the margins of society. Once you had a place to call home, people you could call family and friends who would staunchly vouch for your honor. They're gone now, taken from you by your exile. Maybe you committed whatever unspeakable crime it is that stains your reputation, or perhaps you were framed by another in an attempt to ruin you or your family. Whatever the truth, you have learned not only how to survive but to thrive with nothing more than your wits, the strength of your arm, and what few belongings you have yet managed carry with you.

Skill Proficiencies: Athletics, Perception Tool Proficiencies: One type of tools from the following: Disguise Kit, Forgery Kit, Herbalism Kit, Poisoner's Kit, Thieves' Tools. Languages: One of your choice. Equipment: A set of tools (one of your choice), a set of traveler's clothes, a bag of caltrops, and a pouch containing 10 gp.

Feature: Ear to the Ground You can easily find the local outpost of the watch or similar organizations, and just as easily pick out dens of criminal activity within a community. In addition, you can't be surprised by allies or recent (≤1 minute) former allies while you are still conscious.

Additional Materials

Playtested rules for Aarakocra, Deep Gnome, Genasi, and Goliath player characters may be found in the Elemental Evil Players Companion available on dnd.wizards.com .

Rules for Pyromancer Sorcerous Origin and Inventing Options may be found in Plane Shift: Kaladesh available at either dnd.wizards.com or magic.wizards.com .

Rules for Merfolk player characters may be found in Plane Shift: Zendikar available at either dnd.wizards.com or magic.wizards.com .

Playtested rules for the Storm Sorcerous Origin and expanded backgrounds may be found within the "Sword Coast Adventurer's Guide" (ISBN 9780786965809) available for purchase at dnd.wizards.com.

Playtested rules for Aasimar, Firbolg, Goliath, Kenku, Lizardfolk, Tabaxi, Triton, Bugbear, Goblin, Hobgoblin, Kobold, Orc, and Yuan-Ti Pureblood player characters may be found within "Volo's Guide to Monsters" (ISBN 9780786966011) available for purchase at dnd.wizards.com .