#i started that one in january and came back to it this month bc i needed something to work on in between other pieces
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❗️NEWGLASSANIMALSGLASSANIMALSGLASSANIMALSGLASSANIMALSGLASSANIMALSGLASSAN-
#glass animals#honestly i wore out dreamland sm my brain took a lonnng break from expecting anything from them?? idk i’m just huh????#like….. when i say wore out#i cannot describe how much i listened to it#i usually have some vague idea even if it’s a ridiculous number#like 52 times in a month for an album or something (has happened)#i cannot recall w this#gonna say bc 2020 & they were Literally the last band i saw live. next morning everyone found out about everything annd lockdown. no joke#so it was big dreamland time when it dropped and revisiting their past albums when i broke out of its spell lmao#(pretty sure before that like january was when i listened to déjà vu 100+ times in a row tho so oop. it was a tough day lol)#anyway seeing this aww man. i really have had this band with me for a long long time. 🥹 i remember hearing gooey on the radio one night#driving home from work late @ night in 2014. the drive was so short i couldn’t be arsed to fish out my ipod & plug it in#sometimes so just popped on a good station i had preset. started the car and heard this *voice* and i was like who????#had to check the station bc it was an alt station and i thought i had it on another one which was fine i was just v confused#it was in the middle of the song & i was immediately anxious to know the name hoping i’d hear it & it wouldn't just flow into the next song#then the dj would pile the names together after x number of songs played bc i was tiired (but woulda stayed in the car ngl). got lucky &#ran inside to find it then yelled at my roommate the next day that she HAD to listen to it during a smoke session after work#(i was right & it blew her miiind)#god. what a fucking time. what a fucking band. idk what the disc horse is surrounding them now since they blew up via tiktok#i’m sure people are v quick to say they’re overrated bc of that but idk & i’m glad i don’t know. they’ll always be this#highly inventive incredible band i stumbled upon for the perfect night drive home after a long long shift#a band that came back from a Horrible accident that should have ended 1 of their lives & somehow didn’t & should have ended them#as a band (like still cannot believe Joe was drumming in 2020 & i saw it with my own eyes like how tf???!?)#a band deserving of all of its successes. glass animals forever
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monochrome OC warmup pieces from this month!
#oc art#band oc#tnts#this feels like a good way to do more low-key background practice#since i don't have to color/render anything for real#also that alyssa piece is the first time ive tried painting in ages i forgot i enjoyed doing that#i started that one in january and came back to it this month bc i needed something to work on in between other pieces#dont ask me why alex has a mug outside. a thermos would have made more sense but i didnt feel like going back and redrawing it sdjlkfkjg
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i've briefly spoken about this girl before but now that everything is coming out about her i figured i'd just share the rest of my experience. (tw: death/necrophilia)
qadence & i became mutuals earlier this year (february 15th), she followed me out of the blue one day & was commenting on my stuff so i followed her back bc why not yk? she started out super nice, complimenting me, starting convos, etc. so fast forward a couple of months, i make a tiktok about my girlfriend who passed a week before my birthday in january (which is still up on my tt). she goes to comment and say "damn she's sexy" which i took that as her not reading the caption because several people said something similar. she deleted her comment after i replied with dots, so she messages me and told me that she didn't know she passed, etc. so i just said okay and moved on.
i never talked to her about anything too personal because you literally never know what she could tell people or wtv but one time we did talk about like her dynamic w the team and she was trash talking them lowkey like saying they'd leave her out of stuff, etc. and it's just like??? BE FUCKING SERIOUS. but about a month after, she started being hella weird towards me over sexualizing my gf & saying how if she wasn't deceased, she'd wanna be with her & be intimate ... but everytime she'd send something like that to me, she'd delete it soon as i saw it because she knew what she said was disgusting. so when all that stuff came out about her liking caroline harvey, i knew people would start to catch onto her true personality or at least people who have common sense.
i commented on a tiktok about her being a terrible person and she blocked me shortly afterwards, she was also so bitter and rude about the whole jersey number thing. like i didn't even KNOW u before uconn and how she thinks nika stole her jersey number (10)..
in conclusion, of cou i'm blocked now but this is only my story and it still affects me deeply because of how everything unfolded. if you're still a supporter of her, i truly hope you come to some kind of sense & realize how vile she is.
& to add on to my post, i believe that lili was WAY too gracious to be #her friend.
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yes, sir
part two of the yes series
to read part one, yes, professor, click here !
student hyunjin x fem! student reader x professor changbin
word count: 11,247
Content warnings: cursing, threesome (mfm, no bxb), oral sex (m and f receiving), pussy job, anal sex (f receiving), pet names (slut, whore, baby, sweetheart, etc.), use of professor and sir for males, light spanking, light degradation, descriptions of cum, graphic depictions of sex (that's why ur here lol)
let me know if i missed anything in this one-shot bc i tend to miss stuff! if you want to skip to the smut, scroll to the white heart divider!
six months after yes, professor...
"C'mon baby, I'm hungry!"
You giggled, shaking your head at Hwang Hyunjin, your boyfriend of three months. He tended to be whiny and dramatic at times, especially when he got hangry. But since you'd been his friend since before you started dating, you'd known what to expect.
But today, you had a special plan. Because you weren't just hungry for pizza.
You and Hyunjin had started dating back in January, around three months after you'd officially met during your first semester of senior year. The two of you had really connected over your love for the arts, being two creative people suffering through their one and only math course of their college career. You'd truly come to care about him not only as a friend, but as a potential soulmate, too.
There was really nothing wrong with your relationship, and you had zero complaints about him as a partner. He was sweet and attentive, smart and thoughtful, and he always made time for you. He especially loved setting up cute dates, from painting classes to movie nights. He was also incredibly passionate, always wanting to be near you, whether it be just touching and cuddling, or full-blown makeouts. He constantly gave you butterflies, a warm feeling in your stomach. And it certainly didn't hurt that he was irresistibly sexy.
But there was one thing that had been weighing on your mind for the past month or so. Even though your relationship was strong, and the romantic and sexual chemistry was hot, sizzling even, you had always left each sexual encounter... wanting more.
Because no matter how hard Hyunjin tried, he just couldn't make you cum.
Of course, he was always very apologetic and embarrassed, which was incredibly endearing. And really, you didn't mind that you couldn't finish. He was totally okay with you touching yourself instead, especially if he got to watch. But c'mon, what girl didn't want to cum at the same time as their gorgeous art major boyfriend?
Because at the end of the day, you knew why you were struggling. Every time you came close, hanging on that precipice, begging your body to just release, like clockwork... a certain glasses-clad math professor in a sexy dark sweater would invade your mind. A professor who didn't even teach you anymore. But no matter how long it had been since you'd spoken to him, and no matter how hard you tried, you couldn't shake the thoughts.
But tonight, you were determined to break the cycle. Tonight, you were going to enact a plan: seduce Hyunjin, and have the best sex of your life.
"Okay, okay!" You decided to play along with your hungry boyfriend's complaints for now, following him into his apartment, and laughing all the way to the kitchen. "I wouldn't want my handsome man to starve, after a long day of studying."
He nodded furiously. "Yeah, since you forced me to work, I deserve food!"
You rolled your eyes, slapping his arm playfully. "So me wanting to help you pass English Lit is forceful, now? What about you making me study Art Comp — an elective, might I add — for three hours straight, huh?"
Smirking, he squeezed your hand tightly. "You're right, baby. You deserve to eat too."
But before you could reach for the pizza, Hyunjin's hands, which had been holding yours tightly the entire way back from the campus library, wrapped around your waist, and lifted you onto the kitchen counter. He stepped between your legs and leaned in, so you were mere inches apart. "But first, I'd like my appetizer." He grinned, a silent request.
Your heart leapt. Maybe he was feeling just as horny as you were. Wearing a cozy black cable-knit sweater over a white collared button-up shirt, paired with black slacks and brown loafers, he looked absolutely delicious. How were you expected to resist? You pressed a gentle kiss to his lips, taking his black-rimmed glasses and setting them on the counter so you could pull him closer.
He sighed happily against your mouth, and you brought your hands up to grip both sides of his face, pulling him to you. You melded together, tasting each other with a sweet, gentle passion. How could it be this early, and you were already experiencing such strong feelings for him? It just made your resolve to enact this plan even stronger.
Nipping your bottom lip playfully, he let go, carefully setting you back on the kitchen floor, but never releasing your hand. You wrapped an arm around his waist, curling into the warmth of his body. He smelled of clean laundry and wet paint, your favorite scent as of the past three months. When you breathed him in, a sense of calm blanketed your mind, and you smiled against him.
He kissed the top of your head as he served you a plate of pizza, then pulled a chair out and waited for you to sit, before settling in as well, grabbing a slice for himself. He took a bite, his free hand snaking down to your bare thigh and squeezing tight. The two of you ate in silence, your mind temporarily getting distracted by the need for food. The cheap cheese, the only thing you college students could afford, satisfied one of your cravings after a long day of studying. You closed your eyes and smiled, resting your head on his shoulder in contentment. He looked down and met your gaze, eyes filled with affection. "Was all that hard work worth it, baby?" he teased. "You look like you're in heaven."
You shrugged. "What? It's really good, don't you think?"
He chuckled, reaching out with a napkin to wipe some grease off the side of your face. "I just like seeing you happy. Oh, and I'm fucking starving! It makes even this crappy pizza taste amazing."
Wiping your mouth, you smiled in response. God, was he trying to tease you, by being the absolute best boyfriend in the world and wearing your absolute favorite outfit of his? It was time to get your plan rolling, because you wanted this man too damn badly.
Your hand came up, and you stroked his cheek gently. He closed his eyes, leaning into your touch. "You know Hyun, the pizza isn't the only thing that tastes amazing," you murmured, zeroing in on the splotch of pizza sauce on the edge of his lip. Leaning in, you licked it off, getting a taste of the tangy sauce, an intoxicating whiff of your boyfriend following it.
He visibly gulped, looking you up and down nervously. The back of his neck began to redden, but he grinned, trying to keep his cool. He was just too adorable when he got flustered, you thought with satisfaction.
You snatched up his hand and stood up. "You wanna find out what it is?" you asked coyly. "I hear that there's a very good boy who finished all his studies. I think he deserves something sweet as a reward."
Hyunjin's dark eyes lit up with excitement, and before you could react, he was standing up and snatching you into his arms bridal style, carrying you all the way to his bedroom.
"Hyun, you can't just take me away from my food like this!" you cried, playfully smacking his chest over and over. But you hid a smile against his shoulder. How did you know your plan would be so easy?
He smirked, tossing you onto the bed with just enough care so you wouldn't get hurt. "What? You said I would get a treat. If it's the treat I think it is, I would be a fool to dawdle." Then, he sat on the bed, and patted his lap. "Now, what were you saying about something being delicious and sweet, huh?"
"Okay, okay Mr. Impatient." You rolled your eyes. "But first, I want all this off." Motioning to his sweater and button-up combo, you grinned. "I wanna see how hot my boyfriend is."
"Oh really?" he inquired, brows raised. But without another word, he pulled his sweater over his head and unbuttoned his shirt, exposing his slim, yet distractingly toned body. He'd only gotten more muscular since you started dating. He'd always been mouth-wateringly sexy, but with those sinewy arms and defined abs, it was a panty-wetter for sure.
You bit your lip as you visually devoured him. Reaching your arms out to him, you fisted each side of his open shirt, and pulled him towards you. "Okay Mr. Hwang, it's time for your special reward."
He fell into your embrace readily, hands carding through your hair, as you wrapped your legs around his waist, tugging him as close as possible. You cupped his face in both hands, before dipping your head to his, and engaging in a deep, intimate kiss. His tongue slid into your mouth, and they tangled together messily as he nibbled on your bottom lip, causing you to whine against him, begging for more.
"Already so needy, baby?" he teased, eyes narrowing playfully. "I thought you were giving me a present, not the other way around."
You pouted, beginning to grind against him uncontrollably, desperately seeking the friction his clothed crotch gave you. "Did you think I was just going to give up?" you huffed. Before he could reply, you climbed off his lap, and pushed him into the mattress, sliding down his body and unfastening the button on his slacks, tugging them off, along with his boxers.
His semi-hard cock, flushed and pretty, sprang forth immediately, and you grasped him firmly in one hand, admiring him. All pink and long, with a vein down the middle. You knew he went especially crazy when you licked that spot...
Hyunjin watched you, curious eyes shadowed with arousal. "If this is my reward, can I request something?" he asked, his voice turned deep and husky at the mere prospect of you pleasuring him.
You shrugged, nodding. "Sure baby, you can request anything you want."
"Take your top off, yeah? I can't be the only one without my clothes on, and I want to see your gorgeous body."
You obediently pulled your shirt over your head, leaving you exposed in your lacy black bra. Although you hadn't dressed up outwardly, having been studying for hours, this was part of your plan. So naturally, you had to wow him with his favorite pair of lingerie.
And judging from the way Hyunjin's cock instantly began swelling against your palm, your plan was working. He whistled quietly at the sight, starting to thrust himself in and out of your hand, moaning at the sensation.
"Fuck baby, did you wear that pretty number just for me?" He clenched his jaw as he gazed at you, using both of his elbows to prop himself up so he could observe your skilled ministrations.
You smirked, now using both hands to stroke him up and down. "Is there anything wrong with wanting to look pretty for my man?" you asked demurely, before opening your mouth and licking a stripe down the length of his gorgeous cock, marveling at the salty flavor of his precum, which had started beading from the tip and onto your hand.
"Fuck, don't tease me, angel," Hyunjin gritted out, squeezing his eyes shut at the sensation. "Show me how good your mouth is."
Spurred on by your boyfriend's praise, you took him all the way, sucking with vigor as you bobbed your head up and down, saliva dripping onto his stomach. Kneeling on the bed, you arched your back higher, so he could get a nice view of your ass as you worked.
"Shit, yes, just like that baby, I-I'm gonna fucking bust," Hyunjin stammered through swollen lips, fighting between closing his eyes and the desire to stare at you. "Look at your sexy little ass, in the air just for me. You're so hot." Unable to control himself, his hips began jerking up and down at a faster pace, and you began choking on his cock, as he forced it down your throat.
"Yes Hyun, use me however you want," you gasped around him, using your hands to stroke the base, which was slick with spit and precum. "Fuck, you're so big, I want you inside me right now."
"Yeah? You want your boyfriend to fuck you silly?" he panted in desperation, sweat shining on his forehead. "Then get your cute ass up here."
You hustled to lay on the bed, and Hyunjin knelt above you, his cock still fully hard and pulsing with desire. Wrapping your legs around his waist, you pulled him close to you, inviting his cock to rest at the entrance of your pussy. You were so wet, you were soaking through the sheets below you, begging to be fucked.
"Shit, you're really making a mess down there, sweetheart," Hyunjin murmured reverently, sliding the pad of his thumb against your cunt, forcing a desperate whimper from your lips.
"I'm only wet for you, Hyun." You batted your eyelashes at him enticingly, rubbing your pussy against his cock, reveling in the sensation of him against your sensitive nerves. "Please, fuck me?"
"Ah shit," Hyunjin scrubbed a hand down his face, before using his arms to brace himself over you. "How could I say no, when you just gave me the best gift ever?"
"It's not finished yet," you breathed, as you lined his cock up with your entrance, and, pushing your legs against his back, pulled him flush against you.
Taking this as permission, Hyunjin thrusted into you in one harsh movement, until he was balls deep in your tight heat. The air was instantly filled with your and his desperate moans, as he picked up speed, and he was pounding in and out of you, aided by your raised hips and pretty whimpers.
"Yes baby, yes," he panted, the bed shaking and creaking as he fucked in and out of you impossibly faster, wet slapping sounds proof of your arousal. "You fit me so well, squeeze me so tight."
"Please Hyun, touch me," you gasped, sliding your hands into his hair and pulling desperately. This was what happened every time. You would get so close and beg him to touch you, or kiss your neck, or suck your nipples. And he would, every time. But...
"Of course, beautiful," Hyunjin's rough fingers slipped between your legs, as he began rubbing that bundle of nerves vigorously. "Are you close, baby? I think I'm gonna cum, but I want to finish together this time." His hips shook as he tried to stave off his approaching orgasm.
You whimpered against him, burying your face in his shoulder, breathing in his scent. Grinding yourself frantically against his fingers and cock, neither of which had slowed, you silently begged yourself to get there, just finish so you could have your first ever orgasm at the same time as your boyfriend.
"And from now on, you will call me Professor."
Fuck. You took a sharp inhale of breath, cunt tightening as those words, words which had admittedly haunted you for six months, suddenly invaded your brain. And they always did, every time you had sex with Hyunjin.
"Baby, baby, baby, I-I cant hold off any longer-" Hyunjin gasped, before his hips stuttered, jerking a few times, and he finished inside of you with a few choked shudders.
"I-I'm sorry," you whispered, as your orgasm faded, your mind still stuck on a certain math professor. One you hadn't so much as spoken to in months.
Hyunjin deflated at your words. He knew that you had never finished properly with him. You cared too much about him to lie. But it hurt you to see him like this. "I don't know what I'm doing wrong!"
You pressed a tender kiss to his cheek. "You're not doing anything wrong, babe. We'll figure it out."
But you were upset at yourself. Why was it that whenever you merely thought about Changbin in bed, you were immediately pulled out of whatever aroused state you were in, only thinking about him? Because... you'd never felt the way you had fucking him. Even if you had a perfect relationship with Hyunjin.
Had Changbin ruined all sex for you?
Or had you not gotten him out of your system yet?
—————————————
One week later...
You hustled down the hall towards your final class of the day, Advanced Syntax and Sentence Structure. It was one of your favorite courses, and you were always excited to attend.
But not today. No, today, you were in a terrible mood. You had been for the entire week.
Because all you could think about was the fact that you hadn't been able to properly orgasm for over three months. Was it too much to ask? To cum on your gorgeous boyfriend's cock? That was one of the many questions that had been circulating your brain during all waking hours. Along with, was this what having blue balls was like? If so, no wonder men got so touchy when they hadn't gotten laid.
But the real — and perhaps more disconcerting — conundrum was the fact that you couldn't stop comparing your sex life with Hyunjin to your past foray with Changbin. And even more infuriating still? You'd only slept with that gorgeous buff, domineering, smart man once. He was a little, but not too much, older. And yet, he seemed more mature, and seemed to understand a woman's body better than anyone your age. And potentially because of that, you couldn't stop thinking about that single day in his classroom.
And what you hated the most was that you would never get to be with him, ever again.
It wasn't that you didn't want to be with Hyunjin. Quite the opposite, in fact. You wanted to be with him for the long haul. You thought you could even see yourself falling in love with him. But as confident as he was, he wasn't as sexually experienced as some of your past partners. And certainly not as experienced as Changbin.
"He could learn a thing or two from him..." you muttered before you even realized what you'd said, eyes narrowed as you stared down at your shoes. You regretted that thought, wishing you could just banish your hot former professor from your mind.
But before you could second guess your thoughts any further, you ran headfirst into something. Something much too warm and solid.
—————————————
Changbin was overwhelmed.
It was the final month of the last semester, and finals were quickly approaching. He was teaching five courses, the maximum number of classes a professor could take on in a semester. At the time, he thought it would be a breeze. Now, he was dearly regretting that decision.
He pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose when they slipped down, his gaze buried in his papers while he walked. On top of all his regular responsibilities, a fellow professor and friend had fallen ill, and asked Changbin to sub for their class. He was in the English building, heading there now. In one hand, he held the class's lecture, which he hadn't read. In the other was the Calculus 3000 tests he'd given last week, and had yet to grade, his briefcase around his forearm. He took any free moment to remove a bit of his workload.
Just as he was switching from his lecture to grading the test midair, the wind was knocked out of him, as something — or someone — ran headfirst into him.
"Ah shit!" Changbin grunted, his papers spilling to the floor in a messy heap. Dammit, that was going to take at least a half hour to sort through, he thought grumpily.
"Oh geez, I'm so sorry! God, what a mess of a day..."
Changbin finally looked away from his papers, and back at the person who had run into him. His heart was suddenly thudding out of his chest, tongue feeling wrong in his mouth. Because he would recognize that voice anywhere.
"M-Miss English Major," he croaked, his words broken and awkward. He could feel heat rising up his neck, as he took in the sight of you for the first time in almost five months.
He'd never stopped thinking about you, even after all this time. Whether he was at home alone with nothing but his hand (doing less than savory things), or just sitting in his classroom, exhausted (don't worry, he wouldn't taint that room without you), his thoughts couldn't help but drift back to you. Not only had you shown him what mind-blowingly amazing sex was, but you were also an incredible person. He'd told you the truth, months ago. He'd never met anyone like you. And he still hadn't. And if his body, especially late at night, was anything to go off of, he still wanted you, badly.
But while his memory of that single afternoon with you was clear as a freshly polished window, the intricate details of you had faded overtime. So seeing you now was a punch to the gut, one he would welcome, over and over again.
Because hell, you looked amazing. Even better than what his fantasies continually conjured up. The furrow between your eyebrows when you were distressed, the nape of your neck where a single freckle sat, or your addictive smell, one of orchids and new books.
And your body. He swallowed hard, that lump staying lodged in his throat, making it hard to breathe. Dressed in some kind of distressingly tight cropped t-shirt with the words "Cute Girls Club" written across the tits, he couldn't help but ogle you. Jesus, you were just walking around like that, for everyone to see? And you were doing this, while he sat oblivious, for months? He ground his teeth together in poorly pent-up frustration. How was he getting jealous over you, while you probably hadn't thought about him once? He should really get his shit together, and go to class.
But your eyes were his downfall. That gaze of yours flicked to his, filled with apology (why were you sorry, again?) and... something else. A darkness, one that wasn't there last he saw you. He frowned, all thoughts of abandoning you gone. He carefully studied your features, ones that he'd known so well, terrified that he might forget, or worse, never see again.
Was something wrong?
Your words from a few moments prior echoed in his mind. "God, what a mess of a day..." And upon closer inspection, there was a tension around your eyes, your mouth. Like it was a struggle just to smile.
"Professor Seo." You nodded at him, pulling your bottom lip into your mouth. That tempting, delicious mouth. Changbin tracked the movement hungrily. You averted your gaze, cheeks rosy, like you knew what he was doing. But the mere thought that he might have flustered you flooded him with a sense of relief and pride. But he could still see something was wearing on you.
"Are you okay?" He leaned down so his face was level with yours. Your eyes widened, and he had the urge to grab you, and hold you to him, just for the chance to feel your body again. How had he endured this long outside of your presence?
You shook your head, laughing weakly. "Oh, it's nothing. I wouldn't want to bother you with my stupid shit. Thank you though, Professor." And with that, you made to duck out of his way, and down the hall.
"Wait!" The word flew from his mouth accidentally, but he didn't regret it. Because you turned back around, that tired look still encasing your breathtaking qualities.
"Yes, Professor?" you asked softly. Just the sound of you saying those words brought back an entourage of memories, one that threatened to destroy him. His cock twitched in his pants, and he casually covered himself with his briefcase. Fuck, he could not be getting turned on in the middle of campus, right before class.
He paused. He hadn't thought of what else to say, he just knew that you couldn't leave, not again. "I know we haven't talked in awhile but... you can always tell me what's going on."
You stood there for a few seconds, pondering his offer. The two of you really had gotten to know each other over the semester you had taken his class. He hoped that you felt the same.
"I-it's nothing," you repeated, but there was a quaver of anger hidden in those words. "It's just stuff with my boyfriend. I'm just, well, I'm frustrated-"
But Changbin didn't hear anything past the word "boyfriend". His fists balled themselves at his sides, his breathing came fast and shallow, as he worked his jaw up and down so hard, he felt like his teeth might break. Red colored his vision.
So you had a boyfriend. Who the hell was he? Who had taken his girl from right under his nose? Hadn't the two of you connected like no one ever had? It had felt like soulmate shit, at least to him.
But he supposed he hadn't made another move on you, after your singular rendezvous. And no matter how absolutely incredible it had been, he couldn't expect you to wait around for months. And since you were his student, and he'd been very skittish about any kind of relationship with you before he'd snapped like a taut rubber band, he couldn't blame you if you thought he'd changed his mind again. Maybe even thought he regretted his decision to fuck you in the first place.
But that was so opposite from the truth, it made his chest hurt. He had to do something to rectify it. To get you back. Because you were his girl, weren't you? But what could he do?
"Who is it?" he seethed, voice much angrier than he meant it. But he was just so fucking pissed, and even a little humiliated, that he had his chance, and fumbled, horrifically.
You stared at him, stunned. "You know him," you began. "Hyunjin? We've been together for three months now."
"Oh, the Hwang boy," Changbin scoffed, internally begging his mouth to close, for the next words not to be uttered. But jealousy spurred him on. "Well, there's your problem. There's no way he's satisfying you."
Fuck, he groaned. That was sure to be the end, right? The end of this conversation, the end of a potential re-connection with you. You were going to cuss him out and walk away, never to be seen by him again. His jealousy probably just ruined something that could have been great.
But you didn't do any of that. You just gaped at him, open-mouthed and lost for words. "Well, I- y-you don't know anything!" you stammered, cheeks bright red. "W-why would you think that??"
Changbin paused, caught off guard. Was he... onto something? Was that Hwang boy not satisfying his queen? His beautiful, smart, creative English Major? Were you trying your best to be fulfilled, only for your boyfriend to fall short? Were you sexually frustrated? Yet another onslaught of dirty thoughts berated his mind, of you whimpering and begging your boyfriend to give you an orgasm, and every time, being denied.
That just wouldn't do. He set his jaw, eyes narrowed with misplaced anger. At you, for leaving him. And the Hwang boy, for taking the woman he was just starting to realize the depths of his feelings for. And that jealousy started to coil deep in his stomach, a viper, ready to strike at this golden opportunity.
No, Changbin, he inwardly warned himself. You can't say what you're thinking right now. That would be inappropriate, and grossly assuming that your feelings were anywhere near the same as his. You had a boyfriend, for fuck's sake. There was no way you wanted him anymore. It had been months ago. Things had changed.
He really should go.
"You know, if you're asking for advice... I recommend a more hands-on approach." Shut up Changbin, shut the fuck up.
But again, you didn't leave. Your eyes just flicked back and forth, and you chewed on your lower lip, like you were actually contemplating it.
After another painstaking ten seconds, you spoke. "Do you have a piece of paper?" you asked, eyes zeroing in on the humongous pile still on the floor.
"Oh! Uh, yeah of course!" Changbin practically fell to the ground, scrambling to pick up his papers, trying to look semi-put together while doing so. He snatched up a page from his lecture notes, trying not to let nerves and confusion take over his senses.
You slowly pulled a pen out from the inside of your shirt. Did you store pens in your bra? He salivated at the thought, and his cock stiffened in his pants once again. Dammit, how many times would he get a boner in a mere ten minutes spent around you?
When you realized he was staring, you swallowed. "Uh, English major things," you said hastily, before handing him the pen, face so flushed and pretty, he wished he could reach out and kiss it. When he stared at you dumbly, you added, "Write your number on it. I'll text you." You smiled nervously at him. "If you're serious about your offer, that is."
Changbin had never written anything faster in his entire life. You took the paper from his hand, and he swore you brushed your fingers against his on purpose. A cold sweat broke out across his body, sick satisfaction filling him.
Holy hell, what had he just gotten himself into?
—————————————
You'd always considered yourself to be a reasonably intelligent human being. But making rash decisions, fueled entirely by emotion? That was your fatal character flaw. And today was no different.
But how could any girl with eyes deny Seo Changbin, especially when he was looking sexy as hell in his usual sweater and slacks combo, paired with those glasses that made him look like a big, sexy nerd? His hair was all mussed, and he had heavy eye bags, probably due to lack of sleep and finals fast approaching. And something about that haggard, hardworking professor was your undoing.
And don't even get you started on when he practically started begging you to let him sleep with you one more time, as if he hadn't gotten enough the first time. Damn him for showing up at the same time that you were lusting after him!
So yeah, you were just going to blame this whole messy situation on Changbin. That made everything easier.
Well, not everything. You still had to find a way to breach the subject with your boyfriend.
Of course, you could just pretend that the conversation between you and Changbin never happened, and just go about your life with Hyunjin like normal. And a large part of you, the cowardly part, wanted to do just that.
But a much darker, hungrier side of you wanted this. Desperately. Possibly even needed it. It wasn't that you weren't absolutely obsessed with your boyfriend. Your desperation was, in part, because you were obsessed with him. You wanted this relationship to work so badly, that you were concocting insane ways to help him fully satisfy you.
Something as insane as asking your past hookup to teach Hyunjin how to pleasure you. Because oh, what a remarkable job he'd done at it. Your cheeks warmed at the thought.
Now, you were leaving campus after class, and heading to Hyunjin's apartment. He'd said he was making dinner tonight, and you were both excited and apprehensive to see the result. But the thing that was really stressing you out was deciding how to broach the conundrum you'd landed yourself in, which also happened to be a taboo topic.
You knocked on the door, and you heard a clatter of pots and pans come from within. But you knew you were truly nervous, because you couldn't even focus on the idea of Hyunjin's cooking chaos. You needed to get this conversation over with, now.
"Baby!" Hyunjin shoved the door open, a huge grin on his face. Something red was splattered across his nose, and a waft of tomato sauce emanated from inside. He grabbed your hand, and pulled you into the kitchen, where a pot of sauce was bubbling on the stove, next to some browned ground beef. He grinned, pointing at it proudly. "How does it look?? Amazing, right??"
You smiled, unable to hide your relief. Both at seeing him so happy, and the fact there was no visible mess, yet. "It looks delicious. Is it almost ready?"
He nodded. "The pasta is in the strainer over there, can you grab it for me?"
The two of you finished making dinner together, laughing and talking about how your day went. There was no way you could bring up your conversation with Changbin now, right? You didn't think you could bear to see that gorgeous smile of Hyunjin's slide off his face when he heard that you'd been lusting after another man. Your stomach turned over at the thought. No, you would wait until after dinner.
"As you know, I presented my second art final today!" Hyunjin was babbling, mouth full of spaghetti and meat sauce. "And I have to say, I think mine was one of the best. Not because it was a masterpiece or anything, but some of the others really sucked! Sorry, that sounds rude. They were uh... not good!"
You tried to stay engaged with his story, but your thoughts kept straying, attempting to put together a script of what to say when you inevitably had to confess.
"Baby? Baby? Babyyyy?"
You snapped back to reality. Hyunjin was waving his pasta-filled fork in front of your face, a pout on his lips.
"Ah! Sorry, what were you saying?" you asked, smiling innocently.
He frowned, jabbing the utensil in your face accusingly. "You weren't listening to me?? Babe, what's up? You always listen to all of my stories!"
"I know Hyun, I'm sorry." You reached out and took his hand. Yours was sweaty, so he was sure to know something was wrong. "Today was a... weird day."
He rubbed his thumb over the back of your hand, expression now one of concern. "Weird? How? Tell me!"
So you proceeded to explain how you'd run into Changbin, and relayed the conversation you'd had. Hyunjin knew about your history with Changbin, because you'd told him about it when you'd become close.
So far, he didn't seem to mind that Changbin had asked about your sex life. That was a start. But before you could tell him the insane proposition Changbin had made, you stopped short, cheeks reddening at the thought.
"And?" Hyunjin prompted. "I can tell there's more. After your history, he can't have just walked away."
"No, he didn't," you mumbled, steeling yourself for the big reveal. "He... well, he basically offered to help us out, if we needed it. You know, in bed. And I might have... asked him for his number." You covered your face, as you felt like melting on the spot.
Hyunjin sat next to you, the silence stretching painfully. Suddenly, a hand reached out and grabbed yours, squeezing tightly.
Stunned, you uncovered your eyes, chancing a peek at him. And Hyunjin was... smiling? At you? You took your hands away from your face entirely, gaping at him in surprise. You hadn't expected his reaction. What was his reaction?
"Don't leave me hanging here, Hyun," you managed, laughing shakily as you gripped his hand like a lifeline.
The hint of a smile curled into a full-on grin as he spoke. "You want to have a threesome with Professor Seo, baby?"
You groaned, face bright scarlet. "I-I don't know, I wanted to talk to you first! I haven't texted him, or anything. But..."
"But you haven't been able to cum with me," he prompted. "And... you did with him, right?"
You nodded imperceptibly, unable to utter a word.
"Do you still want to be with me?"
You jerked your head furiously. "Yes! Yes, always, Hyun. I've never connected with anyone more, and I care about you so much. I would only want to do this if you wanted to! I don't want you to think that-"
He laughed, shaking his head. "No I know baby, me too. I just wanted to make sure. Because... I've always thought it would be hot to see you with another guy. Did I ever think it would be my former math professor? Hell no. But if I could join too, then I would do anything to make you happy."
Your eyes widened further, and it felt like your heart was going to explode, as you stared, speechless, at your boyfriend. Was he saying what you thought he was saying? Did he... want to do this? Not just for you, but for his pleasure as well?
"S-so you're saying that-" you stumbled over your words.
Hyunjin leaned in, pressing a gentle kiss to your lips. "Go text him, baby."
changbin
ms. english major
hi changbin
changbin
is this ms. english major?
ms. english major
wow, didn't expect you
to reply so quickly
changbin
well, what is it?
ms. english major
hyunjin and i talked
he agreed to it
changbin
oh really? and?
ms. english major
why don't you come over to
hyun's place tomorrow night? 9pm?
changbin
wow, just assuming i'm
free anytime you want?
ms. english major
...
i'll send you the address.
🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍
Was Changbin making a dreadful mistake?
Standing outside the door of Hyunjin's — your current boyfriend's — apartment, a wave of self doubt threatened to crash over him. Had he completely screwed up agreeing to share a taken woman? He never thought he would find himself in a situation even close to this. He wouldn't do this for anyone.
But you were different. You were you. Creative and witty, passionate in a way he'd never before witnessed, in both life goals and in bed. And on top of it all, he'd connected with you on another level. And now, he couldn't get you out of his head. This would all be worth it to sleep with you one more time.
So he reached his hand up, and knocked on the door.
After a solid twenty seconds, where Changbin could hear nothing except the terrified thudding of his own heart, the door swung open, and... there you stood. Donning nothing but a white silk robe, and a crafty smile.
"Come in, Professor," you said, voice soft and sultry, words dripping like honey off your full, cherry-red lips.
Changbin gulped, following you into the living room, mouth dry. In the soft orange light and the mystery of the night, you looked so delectable, he wanted to pry your legs open and take you right there, on the brown leather couch.
"This is Hyunjin's apartment." You swept your arms around the space, flashing him a flirty grin that had his stomach clenching with desire. "Not that you'll be seeing much of it, outside of the bedroom."
Changbin closed his eyes, trying not to pop a blood vessel from the boner already growing in his pants. Taking a precursory look around, he was impressed with the aesthetic Hyunjin had managed to curate on a college student budget. A mix of artsy and chic, with a smattering of eclectic colors that somehow all harmonized with one another, it truly looked like a home. It was much cozier than Changbin's townhome, which featured a lone picture of him and his close friends at the beach last year, and one gray couch in the living room.
The abode of a true bachelor, he sighed to himself. If he ever wanted to invite you over, he would have to spruce it up, majorly.
The two of you entered the bedroom, where Hyunjin was sitting at a desk, tapping away on his phone like this was just your average evening. Did you do this often? The disturbing idea forced its way into his mind.
You smiled at him again, and the thought dissolved instantly. Hyunjin looked up, and immediately set his phone down, a look of apprehension and cautious excitement crossing his face. Was he just as nervous as Changbin?
"Well, since this is our first time doing anything like this," you began, answering his question, "Hyun and I just want to make sure that you're sure that you're comfortable, and you want to do this. A-and we wanted to let you know that we're open to anything, since you're helping us. Right, babe?" You cut a glance at Hyunjin.
The man nodded, swallowing thickly. "Yeah, I want to pleasure my girl. And... she said she had a great time with you before." He ducked his head.
"And he doesn't mind sharing me, for the night," you added quietly, blushing prettily.
Changbin bit his lip to keep from groaning aloud. Fuck, how did you know exactly how to turn him on?
"Well, if you two are comfortable, then so am I," he started, turning to you, his voice lowering an octave, deep and hoarse. "As long as you're willing to follow my instructions."
You immediately snapped to attention at his tone change, back going taut as a coiled spring. "Y-yes, Professor. Anything you want."
Hyunjin watched with dark eyes, as he ran a hand through his hair. "Fuck baby, I didn't know rough language turned you on so much. I like it."
"So, what's the real problem here?" Changbin asked, wondering exactly how much he could squeeze out of this little deal. "Is it him eating you out? The sex? Both?"
"It's not the sex itself," you paused, chewing your lower lip. "It's just that I can't cum. I-I don't know why, but I just can't get there."
Changbin nodded slowly. "Well, why don't we see what we're working with, huh?" He pointed at Hyunjin. "Show me how you eat her out."
You smiled at him, lip wobbling from nerves. "Before we start, I have a little surprise for you. For both of you."
Changbin watched, entranced, as you slowly removed your robe, body moving oh-so-sensually, revealing matching white and red lace lingerie that left nothing to the imagination. The lace across your perky breasts, the ribbons gracing your silky thighs, everything made his mouth water. You smiled, a sultry look, directly at Changbin, and he was instantly brought back to that day in his classroom, when he'd finally given in to the temptation to take you. That day had been a blur of hot red, as he blindly followed every urge he felt.
As he grabbed you around the waist and pushed you into the mattress, planting a hard, searing kiss to your awaiting lips, it felt even better than that day. You were no longer in your school clothes. You were dressed so pretty, all for him. And he would take anything you were willing to give.
And give you did. Wrapping your legs around his waist and pulling him closer, moaning so sexily against his lips, slipping your tongue into his mouth, you tasted of a desperation that he lapped up like syrup. Your hands slid into his hair and tugged, as the two of you explored one another like it was simultaneously the first time, and the one hundredth.
"I missed you, Professor," you whispered breathlessly, pupils blown wide as you finally broke the kiss. "I was scared you wouldn't agree to come tonight."
He grinned, releasing you and allowing Hyunjin to take his place. "I could never say no to another chance with you, beautiful."
Hyunjin knelt in front of you, licking his lips eagerly. "My irresistible baby," he crooned at you, pulling the white thong to the side and running his thumb through your already soaked cunt.
You whimpered, immediately becoming putty beneath your boyfriend's touch. Sliding a hand into Hyunjin's long, wavy hair, you tugged him closer, lip pulled between your teeth, waiting with baited breath. "Please Hyun, your tongue," you begged.
Changbin watched with reverence, trying to memorize every little reaction, every movement you made.
Hyunjin acquiesced to your pleas without question, shoving his head between your legs as he opened his mouth, latching onto your clit and sucking hard. His fingers worked in tandem with his tongue, as they both fucked in and out of you with abandon.
Your hips bucked against his ministrations, incoherent words of desperation spilling from your lips as you reached for Changbin, eyes watery and filled with need. A sheen of sweat already glistened across your forehead, and Changbin was at your side in an instant, pressing kisses against you, relishing the salty taste.
"You like that huh, sweetheart?" he growled, a deep rumble in his throat, as he moved his lips down your neck, across your collarbone, and to your breasts. "You like the feeling of your boyfriend eating your wet little pussy, while your professor sucks your nipples?"
You cried out, and Hyunjin only increased his movements in response, the wet squelching of your cunt mixing with your garbled moans. Changbin latched onto a raised nipple and sucked harshly, biting at them, and making you squirm with sensitivity beneath his grasp. Hyunjin continued to fuck his tongue in and out of you, his fingers stroking you desperately.
You gripped Changbin's arms, and he knew your orgasm was looming closer and closer. You squeezed your eyes shut, hands moving to his hair and pulling as you wrapped your legs around Hyunjin's head, entire body shaking violently.
"Y-yes, right there!" you pleaded, rocking your hips, hungry for more. Your gaze locked on Changbin, hot with lust, and his cock twitched in response. "Please, don't stop!"
Hyunjin moaned raggedly against you, sending vibrations shivering through your sensitive nerves. But no matter how hard he tried, no matter how amazing it felt, your orgasm... subsided. Disappeared. You whimpered softly, heart sinking.
"Did you cum, love?" Hyunjin asked after a moment. But he already knew the answer. You hesitated, then shook your head.
"It looked like you were really enjoying it," Changbin mused, pressing another kiss to your chest and standing up. "And not to be weird, but I think he was doing a good job."
"Do you like it when Professor Seo says mean things to you, baby?" Hyunjin interrupted, continuing to rub gentle circles against your soaked pussy. "Every time he said something mean, you practically gushed on my tongue."
You averted your gaze, cheeks red. But you nodded anyway. "Yes, I think... I think when he's mean to me, I get really turned on," you whispered, finally meeting Hyunjin's gaze. "I think it really pushes me over the edge."
Changbin nodded slowly, finally starting to understand. "Gorgeous?" he barked, and you stared at him with those wide, alluring eyes. He had to tear his gaze from yours to continue. "Hyunjin? You said you were willing to learn. Why don't you watch?" Changbin held his breath, hoping that Hyunjin wouldn't call him on his shit. Because if he was being honest, he wanted you to himself, just this once.
Hyunjin paused, glancing at you in askance. You nodded silently, sending him an encouraging smile. With a jerk of his head, he moved slightly off to the side, while also giving himself a good view of what was happening.
"I'm only doing it because my girlfriend wants this," Hyunjin warned. "And because I have no idea why she can't finish. I want to please her."
Changbin chuckled. "Of course. And I'm here to help." With that, he grabbed both of your legs and spread them wide, positioning his hips between yours, leaning down, and capturing your lips with his.
You moaned loudly against him, wrapping your legs tightly around his waist, and grinding your soaked pantie-clad pussy against his pants. "Can I take your shirt off, Professor?" you whispered breathlessly, fingers already tugging at the hem.
He nodded, the heat of embarrassment and pride climbing up his neck. He helped you remove his shirt, and then unbuckled his belt and pulled his pants off, sighing in relief. His cock had been pressing against the confines of his jeans since he arrived.
You rubbed your hand against his cock through his boxers, before expertly tugging them off, and stroking him to full hardness. He gritted his teeth so hard they hurt, his eyes shut tight as he tried to reign in some semblance of self control. He'd missed you so desperately, he ached.
"Don't tease me, you little slut," he ground out, hips rocking against your touch insistently.
"I'm not doing anything!" You blinked up at him, a devilish smile on your face, continuing to pump him, heavy in your hand. Fuck. His cock swelled further. You really were just a minx, weren't you?
"I'm warning you, kitten," he hissed, eyes narrowed. When you didn't stop, he grabbed both of your hands, and pinned them by the wrists over your head, ignoring your squeals of protest. "That's it, I told you," he spat, positioning himself outside your entrance, which was dripping onto the blankets.
"P-please Professor!" you gasped, panting with need. "Fuck me, please."
"You don't deserve it, spiting me like a whore," he snapped. But he was so fucking turned on, he couldn't tease you for long. With a strangled growl, he filled you with one thrust, knees buckling at the heavenly sensation of your tight heat enveloping him, like you were made to fit his length.
"God yes Professor, please fuck me faster." You clung to his arms, tears streaming down your face as you dug your heels into his back, pushing him deeper inside you.
He nearly choked on his words, stars winking across his vision, as he began pounding in and out of you, balls slapping your pussy, the bed rocking with the power of his movements. "Fuck yes, take it," he snarled. "You'll take everything I give you." Was this what heaven felt like? You were so warm, molded to him so perfectly. His hips snapped against yours, all that pent-up tension spurring him on as he gave you everything he'd fantasized about over all these months.
"O-oh yes, whatever you want Professor," you panted, warm cunt spasming around his rock hard cock. "Fuck, I think I'm gonna cum, please Professor, can I cum?" You reached your hand out to Hyunjin, and he immediately accepted, as you gazed pleadingly up at them both.
Without you having to ask, Changbin slid a hand down to your drenched, swollen clit. He rubbed fiercely until you were trembling against him, gasping in pleasure. Hyunjin watched, entranced, which sent a thrill of excitement zipping through Changbin, spurring him to pick up speed. God, you felt so fucking good. How had he spent this many months without indulging himself in your glorious body?
You clung to his muscular arms, sobbing and babbling his name incoherently, pussy contracting, hips shuddering. Changbin could feel his orgasm coming, but he staved it off. He couldn't finish already, in the first round. He was doing this for you and your pleasure.
"Cum for us, pretty girl," he commanded, punctuated with a harsh slap to your ass. "Cum like the slut you are."
You cried out, cunt so tight it felt like you were suffocating him. He couldn't breath, as you shook like a leaf, body taught, mouth opened in a wide "o". Your hand slid into his hair, tugging, as your hips shook and jerked uncontrollably.
"F-fuck Professor, Hyun!" And with a wail, you finally toppled over the long-awaited edge, clinging to both men as you fell apart around Changbin's pulsing cock.
He fucked you through it, gently stroking your clit, and reveling in your shivering, sweaty perfection, until you whimpered from overstimulation. He gently pulled out, and allowed Hyunjin to switch places, and hold you.
"Oh my god," you panted, curling into your boyfriend's arms, catching your breath. "That was- that was amazing."
"So what do you think, Hyunjin?" Changbin tried to act nonchalant, like he hadn't just had world-implodingly incredible sex. There was no way around it. He was addicted, and he needed more. But he had to stay true to his word, and give Hyunjin his turn. "Are you ready to try it yourself?"
Hyunjin paused, gazing down lovingly at you in a way that made Changbin's heart squeeze. "So, you like it when Professor Seo says mean things to you..." he said again. He slowly began removing his shirt, your eyes tracking him hungrily.
You nodded, cheeks still flushed with post-sex elation. "I don't know why, but I think it's really hot," you murmured.
Hyunjin brushed a strand of hair from your eyes. Then, he spoke.
"From now on, you will call me sir."
The atmosphere immediately changed, like all the oxygen was sucked out of the room. You stared at your boyfriend, usually such a sweet person, in shock. Changbin hid a laugh. Apparently, Hyunjin had caught onto the fact that you loved calling him "professor" in bed, and got turned on by the degrading nicknames and occasional spanking. But a single nickname wouldn't be enough to truly please you in bed. He would have to act the part, too.
But apparently, Changbin had no reason to be concerned.
"Climb on up here, and fuck me like the slut you are," Hyunjin demanded, slapping your ass, as he watched you expectantly.
"Y-yes sir!" You scrambled to follow his demands, eyes still huge with nervous excitement. You unzipped Hyunjn's pants, and helped him strip off his boxers, allowing his long, pretty cock to spring free. He tugged his shirt off, and you stared in awe at his muscled torso. Changbin smirked down at you in satisfaction. At the end of the day, you just wanted to be dominated.
"Okay angel, start grinding that wet little pussy all over him, okay?" Changbin instructed, wanting to see how you would react to him controlling the situation.
You whined, but nodded, spreading your legs and rubbing yourself all over your boyfriend, causing him to grit out a moan, eyes squeezed shut, as pleasure washed over him.
"And since she likes you to dominate her, maybe adjust her to where you want her, before fucking her," Changbin prodded Hyunjin, who immediately opened his eyes, and grabbed your hips with rough hands.
"Yeah, right there," Hyunjin hissed, pressing you harder against his length, which was aching between your slender thighs, as he moved you against him. "Be a good girl, and let me fuck you how I want."
Your lip wobbled, and you nodded, clinging to the threads of your desire. "Y-yes Hyun- I mean, sir. Please take me now."
Hyunjin's eyes flicked over to Changbin, who just eyed him intently. With that silent approval, Hyunjin lined himself up outside of your aching cunt, and drove himself home, filling you to the brim.
Instantaneously, the room was filled with a chorus of both of your moans. You gripped his slim arms tightly, leaving moon-shaped crescents on his skin, as his veins became more prominent beneath your hands. He growled raggedly against your ear and his hips snapped up against yours, power growing and growing, as you cried into his chest.
"Y-yes, fuck me harder!" you begged, tears wetting your lash line.
"What do you call me, my little slut?" Hyunjin ground out, possessive gaze burning a trail across your skin.
"S-sir, please!" you implored, pressing repeated kisses across his hard pecs. "More!"
"Touch her," Changbin ordered. "She's shaking like a little bitch, it'll make her fall apart around you."
Hyunjin reached a hand between your legs, rubbing rough circles across your aching clit, causing you to shudder and grind yourself needily against him.
"Be gentler, she'll get rug burn if you go much faster," Changbin snapped, and Hyunjin slowed down, stroking you with a tender touch.
"O-oh fuck, I think I'm close!" you gasped, chest wracked with sobs of pleasure as you bounced yourself on your boyfriend's cock, squeezing him so tight he struggled to breathe. "Please don't stop sir, please! Can I- can I cum-"
"Yes angel, cum on me like the whore you are," Hyunjin bit the shell of your earlobe, not relinquishing his relentlessly fast pace in and out of you.
You tumbled over the edge, mouth open on a soundless cry, nails digging deep into his arms, as you trembled around him so violently, he had to grip you hard to keep you stable, lights winking in front of your eyes as you reveled in the sensation of your boyfriend balls-deep inside you. Your pussy was made for him, made for Changbin. Made for the two of them. Small whines of Hyunjin's name were the only things to escape your kiss-swollen lips, as you rode out your high.
Hyunjin's hips stuttered as you came, the warmth and wetness of your perfect little pussy squeezing him so tight, milking him dry. He thrusted his hips messily in and out of you a couple more times, before spurting a load of white liquid into you, fucking the mix of both of your cum into your tired body.
You collapsed on top of him, a sweaty, but satisfied mess. "You-you-" you babbled softly, reaching up and running a hand through his hair adoringly. You glanced up at Changbin, a shy smile on your face.
Changbin grinned down at you, a bit uncomfortable. Should he still be here? "How was that, love?" he asked, voice a deep rasp.
"I-it was amazing Professor," you breathed, a look of wonder in your eyes. "Thank you."
Hyunjin glanced at Changbin, an uncertain look crossing his face. "Would you like to... join us?" he offered, glancing at you fleetingly. "I bet she'd enjoy it. You're down for another round, right angel?"
You turned around, having been kissing up and down Hyunjin's sweaty neck. You stared up at Changbin with a look that had his cock instantly springing to life, and a groan rising in his throat. "I would love for you to join, Professor," you breathed, presenting your ass to him like a dessert on a platter, smiling coquettishly at Hyunjin. You added, "I'm always ready, if it's with both of you."
"Well shit," Changbin growled, striding over, hands clenched at his sides. "How could I say no to that?"
You climbed back onto Hyunjin's lap and gripped his cock, already ready for a second round. You lined up his hard cock outside of your pussy, which was still dripping wet. You closed your eyes, biting your lower lip in anticipation, before slowly impaling yourself on his perfect length.
The two of you let out simultaneous moans of delight, as you began bouncing up and down on top of him, the slapping sounds filling the room, as you squealed and whimpered with tantalizing desire.
Hyunjin grabbed your ass, fucking you over and over on his length, moving you rapidly, in tune with his own pleasure. "Fuck, you're an eager little slut tonight, aren't you?" he hissed, eyes glazed over with unbridled ecstasy, as he drank in the sensation of your pussy clenching around him.
"Fuck me harder, sir!" you whined, hands pressing into his broad chest, as you looked back at Changbin, who was drinking in the sight before him with relish. "Professor, aren't you going to join in? I've always wanted a thick cock inside my ass."
A rumble vibrated inside his throat. From the sound of it, you'd never been fucked by two guys at the same time, and not at all in your ass. Maybe you'd even dreamed about it being him. And the mere idea of that had him seeking a bottle of lube, which sat on your nightstand, and starting to prep the two of you. His heart thudded in his chest, just thinking about how tight you would be.
"If my perfect babygirl wants me there, then I'm happy to oblige," he growled through the pleasure, and you shook your ass at him in response, as you continued to roll your hips against Hyunjin, teasing desperate moans and hitched breaths from his lips.
He began running his pointer finger against the puckered entrance, and you trembled beneath him, clenching around Hyunjin, who growled a curse.
"Relax, baby," Changbin crooned, inching his finger slowly inside of you. "I need to stretch you out before you can even hope to take me."
You choked on a gasp at the foreign sensation, trying to turn around and look. But Hyunjin gripped your jaw to keep you facing him, as he continued thrusting in and out of your pussy, his movements becoming sloppier by the second. So instead, you tangled your hands in your boyfriend's long hair, desperate, ragged sobs muffled by his chest, as he continued to have his way with you.
"Does that feel good, angel?" Hyunjin stroked the flawless skin of your back, as he snapped his hips up against yours, keeping a cruel pace despite the fact you'd gone boneless on top of him.
You let out a broken moan, nodding your head as you pressed feverish kisses to neck, and down his chest. Hyunjin shuddered at your touch, continuing to pound into your ruined cunt.
"Just like that, baby," Changbin praised, kneading the soft skin of your ass, as he gently removed his finger, and inched the tip of his cock past the tight ring of your hole. He trembled at the sensation, vision going foggy with pleasure as he rocked his hips further against you, until he was halfway inside.
"A-ah shit Bin- I mean, Professor!" you cried, clenching around him instinctively. "Fuck, you're huge."
"You'll take him, like the slut you are," Hyunjin barked, pulling your hair so you met his gaze. "I bet you like him stretching out your ass like that, huh?"
"I-I-" you stammered, face reddening. "Y-yes sir, I love it," you croaked, voice cracking, as pleasure threatened to overwhelm you.
"Tell him what you want," Hyunjin prompted, and you keened against him, arms wrapped around his neck as pleasure thrummed in your veins.
You slowly turned around to face Changbin, who swallowed hard. He was desperately trying to fend off his already incoming orgasm, but that fucked out look you were giving him was making it damn near impossible.
"Please go deeper, Professor," you whimpered, voice throatier and more strained than he'd ever heard. "Don't be gentle, I can take it."
"Fuck, kitten," Changbin uttered, steeling himself for the blinding pleasure that was sure to come. With that, he rolled his hips against your plush ass, and buried himself to the hilt in one harsh thrust.
The movement drove Hyunjin's cock even deeper inside of your aching pussy, causing the man to let out a surprised, guttural moan. He hit the soft spongy part inside of you that until now, only Changbin had found, and you were shuddering and begging for more, both from the foreign sensation of two men inside of you, and the euphoria of your boyfriend pleasuring you like he never had.
Fuck, this was going to kill him, was all that echoed through Changbin's muddled mind as he slammed in and out, lost in the suffocating tightness of you, the way you smelled, looked, sounded, as he destroyed you. Even as you clenched around him, he didn't let up his pace, pulling out all the way, only to drive himself home each time. No woman had affected him in the least. Now, he couldn't help but become drunk on your very essence.
"Sir, Professor, I think I'm close," you whimpered, words slurring together you writhed between them, pussy contracting around Hyunjin like a vice. "C-can I cum now?"
"I'm close too," Hyunjin wheezed, his hips jerking up and down uncontrollably, as he pulled you down for a messy kiss, full of tongue and teeth. "Cum with me baby."
"Professor, p-please cum inside me?" You shuddered against him, as he leaned down and nipped the shell of your ear, hot breath fanning against your cheek.
"Shit, I'm already about to bust," he growled, voice strained as he continued to hammer his pulsing cock in and out of you. But he was starting to lose control. You did this to him, made him go insane. "Are you proud of yourself, you little whore? Making me lose my composure like this? Having your professor cum inside you? Fill you up so well?"
"Oh my god, yes!" you wailed, your entire body arching against the two men who held you between them, tremors wracking your body in waves. Hyunjin was stroking your clit in messy circles, sucking on your neck as he murmured sweet nothings against your skin. "Fuck, you both feel so good, I-I'm gonna-"
And before you could finish your sentence, you let go for the last time, entire body quivering with the orgasm you'd been desperately waiting for, until tonight. You clutched Hyunjin's hair in your hands, back bowing into Changbin's shuddering hips, as you finished around both men, in a whimpering, spasming mess, crying incoherently, the only words Changbin could understand being "sir", "professor", and "please".
Hyunjin finished next, gasping out your name as he bullied his throbbing length into you with growing need, letting out soft moans and whines, those full lips devouring yours hungrily, as he fell apart, spilling his load inside of you, milky cum leaking from your pussy down your leg, and onto the blanket.
Changbin was the last to get there, as he gripped your slender waist so tightly in his rough hands, he thought he might break you. His balls contracted painfully, as he trembled above you, the sensation of you squeezing him as you came almost causing him to pass out. "Mine, mine mine," he repeated, harshly sucking the skin on your neck as you nearly collapsed underneath him. But he pulled you up, and held you flush against his chest, continuing to pound mercilessly in and out of you, grunting and growling into your soft hair. His hips twitched and jerked, and he came inside you, so hard he had to hold onto you for purchase.
The three of you collapsed onto the mattress, your tongue lolling from your mouth, completely fucked out, body still wracked with the shockwaves of the intense lovemaking. Hyunjin curled into you, becoming the little spoon, as he kissed the backs of your hands, murmuring praise upon praise.
"You did so good, pretty girl," he murmured adoringly, as you continued to play with his hair, kissing up and down his neck and giggling sleepily.
Changbin watched the two of them, a distinct sensation of discomfort washing over him. He'd done his job, which was helping your and Hyunjin's sex life. And now the two of you were clearly happy without him. He should probably see himself out.
But as he started to grab his clothes and get dressed, you rolled over to face him, a confused look on your face.
"Bin, where are you going?" you asked, voice hoarse with overuse. You looked as beautiful as ever, hair wild and messy, skin glowing after getting properly fucked by the two men you were obsessed with.
Changbin swallowed, forcing himself to be cordial. "I thought now that I did my job, I should leave."
You reached a hand out to him, a pleading smile lighting your face. You glanced at Hyunjin for approval, and he nodded. "What if I didn't want you to leave, Professor?"
Changbin smiled, cheeks warming. "Then I'd stay for as long as you like."
laska’s note —
well well well… if you’re reading this note, you must have reached the end of this one shot, and (probably) the end of the two-part series! if you haven’t read the first part, yes, professor, i have it linked at the beginning of this post. i promise, it’s worth the read, and this one shot might make more sense.
i apologize for the very long wait, i know many of you have been eagerly awaiting another installment! i hope it was worth it, even though it was incredibly long 🫣 i hold myself to a high standard when it comes to my writing, so i combed through this thing multiple times. i hope it lived up to your expectations, and i hope i will have more time to write spicy one shots for you all in the new year, because i have a lot of great ideas 😏
#skz imagines#skz oneshots#skz#stray kids#skz stay#skz smut#skz x reader#skz x female reader#skz female oc#stray kids smut#changbin x reader#hyunjin x reader#changbin smut#hyunjin smut#hwang hyunjin#seo changbin#changbin smau#changbin x female reader#hyunjin x female reader#skz smau
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taekooker to jikooker: my personal experience.
this is merely how i felt and all the things i saw while being a hardcore taekooker for almost a year and a half. if you get offended, im sorry but the unfollow and block button is right there, i dont mind. i love taekook themselves, but i can no longer look at them in the way i used to. now they genuinely look like best friends to me. people change, and their perceptions and views on different aspects of life change. thats what happened to me.
I first joined this fandom 5 years ago in mid january 2018 through my friends. taehyung was my first ever bias, so most of the bts related yt recs i had were mostly of taehyung and ot7, and occasional ship videos among which taekook was the most prominent. me being a curious lil unsuspecting lamb, clicked on one, it also helped that my friends were taekookers as well so i dived pretty deep into the rabbit hole of taekook. im gonna be writing my thoughts and experiences on shipping taekook at different times of the year. i dont remember every single detail clearly (like this was 5 years ago) so forgive me if i sound vague at times plus this will only be a summary. without further ado, lets start, shall we?
february-march, 2018
by this time, i already watched quite a few taekook analysis videos, i also came across a few tkk_lives' videos(i think i came across her vids like much later but i just included it here) as well as other deluded channels. i fell even deeper into the rabbit hole. i thought taekook were the epitome of boyfriends silly in love, i felt like they had the best chemistry and that they were the ones whose ship actually made sense. i feel so embarrassed to admit this but one of my rather major reasons for shipping them was how good they looked tgthr🤦♀️(im a changed person now i promise). now i realise many tkk analysis channels tend to heavily edit things to make it look like theres something going on, overanalysing things to no end, it made me see them as if they were closer than they actually are, and as if theyre hiding something, but it was really just heavy and clever editing that forces your mind to get convinced. it was quite literally manipulative. plus back then, i was rather immature and hadnt even been in a rltnshp yet, so i blindly believed whatever they said. i believed every narrative and every theory they put out even if i knew lots of them didnt even make sense. they constantly also put out the jealous jungkook/taehyung whenever the other breathes next to another member..as i now realise, thats one of the biggest toxic traits a person can have. they were always pushing tkk as a toxic relationship without even knowing it(or just ignoring it). i also do not like jikook analysis vids where they are portrayed as the same territorial mfs who cant stand the other interacting with anyone else but himself. bc thats literally pushing their relationship as a toxic one and making them look toxic, and i would rather not do that.
march/april-september, 2018
i only watched taekook vids and funny bts moments for a long while as a baby army. i didnt watch official content very much, i ddint even know how to watch official content..i didnt know bangtantv existed yet💀 this tkk analysis watching continued for around 4 or so months after i became an army before i took an unintentional break from them(analysis vids) and i went on twitter. twitter, was so much worse(as i now realise). i didnt have an account at that time and learnt to browse on twt without one(it doesnt really let you do that anymore). at first, i found nothing weird or unusual and i enjoyed lurking on twitter, but slowly i started to see the ugly side of the community. i found multiple accounts directly or indirectly hating on jimin. i was weirded out. very weirded out. i was quite conflicted but..i only thought of it as jimin haters who were coincidentally tkkrs, maybe i refused to see tkk shippers in a bad light? probably, unfortunately i cant remember much and as i said, i was immature.
october-december, 2018
i stumbled across gcf in tokyo somewhere in october, i think it was in a fanwar on twitter and a jkkr said "at least we have this" or sumn along that line and put a link to gcft . idek how i didnt see it earlier. immediately after watching it, i felt..weird, conflicted, insecure. insecure about my ship. it seemed so romantic to me even then. but ofc i didnt let myself give up immediately, and i searched interviews + info about it, i found tkkrs saying vminkook were supposed to go tgthr and jikook only went bc they had a few days off and tae didnt. that gave me a lil bit of security and i held onto that thread of security and refused to believe or even hear out the actual fact(which i will come to later). as you can see, i was a stubborn mf. inside i knew that even if tae not having time off was the "only" reason behind jikook's japan trip, it was still unusual and suspicious to go on a trip with only your "bro" when said "bro" has told you and the world multiple times that they wanna go on a trip alone with you, when the hotel room you're staying at with your "bro" has a see-through glass wall for the bathroom and when you make a whole love confession in the guise of a travel log for your "bro" while your boyfie is waiting for you at home.
in conclusion, i was very insecure.
did i give up? no, not yet. we're getting there.
so as a masochist and out of curiosity caused by insecurity, i searched up jikook videos on yt, thinking "there's no way they could ever have more chemistry than taekook 🙄" - when i tell you i was wrong as fuck, i mean it. i was HUMBLED. the chemistry and tension between jungkook and jimin was undeniable. i felt uncomfortable watching some certain moments, felt things that i didnt feel while shipping taekook, saw things i didnt see in taekook.
i was confused plus the sinking feeling you get when you've been too loud about what you think and your opinions but then it turns out you were a stupid ass bitch.
there was a plethora of jikook vids, and i think my first jikook video was from Made in Busan, ig it was the "serendipity" analysis? back then it made lots of sense to me, but now it looks slightly overanalyzed (i still believe "serendipity" is very much connected to jikook tho). i slowly got more introduced to jikook in general. this mainly occured in like the first week of october and december as i had my boards in november.
december/january-february, 2019
so its been more or less of a year since ive become a tkkr, gcft is still in the back of my head screaming at me. and then jikook drop another bomb. that is, 2018 MMA.
this..was just, just..i cant explain it in words. jungkook had every bit of his attention directed towards jimin, they were giving each other loving glances, jimin giving jungkook a flying kiss, jungkook giving jimin a finger heart, jungkook subconsciously massaging jimins nape..it was just so domestic and coupley. i've never third wheeled so bad in my life. i felt like i was interrupting something by watching them. imagine how hyunjae next to them felt😔✊not to mention how it very much looked like jungkook was saying "남편"[ nampyeon] meaning "husband" and "형의 남친"[ hyung-ui namchin ] meaning " hyung's boyfriend" in their conversation after jimin pointed to himself and jungkook (forgive me if the spellings/romanizations are not accurate enough, im not fully fluent in korean). plus, after jungkook said it, jimin smiles and shyly looks down..LIKE??
youtube
watch from 31:00 to see for yourself. im not kidding.(p.s i love this video so much)
i was bamboozled. i was shocked. i was frustrated. i was feeling stupid. i was begging for taekook to drop something mindblowing or sumn that would regain my secuity in the ship and i found some moments during other award shows but, it didnt feel the same. to me it was really looking like taekook had boundaries and limits between each other, the limits that apply when you're good friends. but with jikook, i couldnt see how their gazes towards each other could be passed off as anything platonic, how their actions+body language could ever be seen as platonic.
so what did i do? did i give up? oh hell no im stubborn as fuck. but we're getting there.
i ignored every jikook moment and brought my focus back on taekook, i started watching analysis and moments again. in a span of a few weeks, the security around my ship had improved after pretending that i didnt feel like a stupid mf after MMA 2018. haha. it sorta worked lol. sorta.
march-may, 2019
these were my last months as a taekooker.
after all that shit, all i wanted was more taekook moments to make me feel better about myself. and i did get quite a few. however, as i said before, they looked like they had boundaries. i couldnt look at them exactly the same.
i was busy in april with my class tests, i doubt i had much time to catch up with the boys. so when the tests ended, it was most likely in the last week of april or the first few days of may.
we all know what happened in the first few days of may, don't we? in case you don't, this is what happened.
surprisingly, i clearly remember the first time i got to know about it.
it was in class, i just arrived and then one of my friends and i start talking and she goes [this convo is all translated from bengali]
"hey did you see what jungkook did at the latest concert?"
"no, i didn’t, what did he do?"
"he went and literally sucked on jimins ear!"
i was shocked once again, my eyes went wide, my heart did a backflip..all that shit. i didnt believe it at first.
"don't joke around like that, you're being absurd" i said.
"im not kidding bro, he sucked jimins ear in the rosebowl concert last week, ill send you a link too"
when i got back home, sure enough, the link was there and i saw jungkooks ear nibbling in all its glory, albeit a bit low quality. but no doubt he took that ear into his mouth and i knew it.
surely i must've given up now? no, but im this🤏 close we're almost there i promise
i went online and found lots of tkkrs denying that jungkook ever took jimin's ear into his mouth and that jimin's ear only got caught on jk's chin. but..if it got caught on jk's chin then that means his chin was behind jimin's ear, and his lips must have been at least kissing jimin's ear, given that we couldnt see them very well. the lip we could see was the upper lip, which again lead me to be believe that jungkook did indeed, suck jimin's ear.
yeah, my faith in tkk was crumbling into millions of pieces. because i couldnt see how jungkook, being in a supposed relationship with taehyung, could do that with tae's best friend. i sure as hell wouldnt let my partner get away with that, nor would i ever do that myself with someone else other than my partner. even if its to comfort them. it just goes way over platonic boundaries.
i was seriously considering shifting over to jikook by now. but before that, i searched lots of shit up abt jikook.
there i saw an interview where jimin talked about the tokyo trip with jungkook. what i believed until now was that vminkook were supposed to go tgthr but jikook were the ones with time off, and tae didnt have time off. jimin said he told taehyung and jungkook that he wants to go on a trip to Japan. he didnt say he wanted to go on a trip WITH taehyung and jungkook. yall, ive told my wishes to go to japan and turkey multiple times to my friends, does that mean im taking their asses with me? no. mind you, jimin has said he wanted to go on a trip alone with jungkook multiple times in their rookie era. on jimin's bday of 2017, jungkook tweeted a pic of him(jimin) with the caption "Its not over yet.." and shortly after, we find out jikook went on a tokyo trip by THEMSELVES with no staff, no managers and no other members. dropped off at the airport by jungkook's dad and brother and jimin's dad. jungkook paid for everything and put a hell lot of time into making the masterpiece that is gcf in tokyo WITH a bgm of a gay fucking song by a queer fucking artist and showed the fucking rainbow colored ferris wheel at the line "love is a road that goes both ways".
also
its clear who the main model of gcf is.
you can deny the trip being only for jikook, but you can not deny the symbolism and significance shown in gcf in tokyo. saying "jungkook didnt understand the song, hes not fluent in english" - is so small minded and belittling.
saying he didnt show jimin on the parts "boy, im holding onto something, wont let go of you for nothing, im running, running just to keep my hands on you" on purpose is not only straight up denial but also understimating jungkook's intelligence and artistic capabilities, saying that jungkook isnt smart enough to get the meaning behind these words. and just because hes korean. thats fucking racist if you ask me.
then i discovered the iconic osaka vlives, i was convinced. it was my last straw along with rosebowl.
alas, after around a week of denial, i gave up and became a jikooker in mid may of 2019. ive never looked back. over the years they've only given us more and more evidence and i doubt my beliefs will ever change soon.
i hope this was kinda fun to read, i had been planning to do this for a long time. im glad i finally got to say my thoughts out here. thank you for taking the time to read this<3
#Youtube#bts#kpop#kpop icons#kpop layouts#jungkook#jimin#bts layouts#jjk#jikook kookmin#jikook#kookmin#mingguk#mingukkie#minkook#toxic taekookers#taekooker to jikooker#jikook headers#jikook icons#jimin and jungkook#jeon jungkook#bts jungkook#park jimin#jimin bts#bts jimin#jimin gcf#gcf in tokyo#jikook is real#jikook is real go cry abt it
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Recently I have been making a kind of trans memory box of important things from my transition and as someone who lives in a fairly unsupportive environment I'm finding it really healing in a way. Like even despite it all I'm finding elements of me. I saw someone do this on Instagram a while ago so I definitely stole the idea. I'm just putting it in a random shoebox but I hope I'll look back on it one day when I'm in a better situation and further transitioned and like,, feel emotional about it. But this is what's in my memory box so far:
- my diary from 2016 which is the year I came out to everyone, it starts in May and I came out to my parents in January so I don't have their reaction but from the fact they gave me the notebook and they wrote a dedication to me which says "dear [deadname]" we can infer they are not on board (they still arent). But I've written entries about coming out to other people and talk about my life. Also I was in an abusive relationship later on in 2016 and its interesting to hear abt that bcs a lot of my memory has gone. I was in year 7 and its just crazy to think how my life has changed.
- old binder, not my very first binder bcs idk where that has gone I don't think I still have it but it's the last gc2b binder I had I've been getting spectrum since 2019 and its very stretched out bcs once I wore it for 8 consecutive days and nights (very very unadvisable). But its the longest ago binder I have so it'll have to do
- zine I was in when i was 17 that I hid from my parents bcs its Trans Themed
- my deedpoll
- letters from the GIC clinic from 2019 and 2021 (the second one telling me I have been put on the adult waiting list). I am literally nearly a year and a half on T and I still haven't got a GIC appointment it's a joke. (I started T priv but then transferred over to a nhs dr)
- First ever testosterone bottle packaging that I have stuck both my private prescription label and nhs prescription label to
I think I am gonna print out my gender dysphoria diagnosis if I ever have the opportunity (it is very funny bcs when I got diagnosed w gender dysphoria I was 3 months on T and had been identifying as trans for 7 years so i was like. Yeah no shit) and a photo of me the day I came out but I'm trying to think what other things I can put in it
#trans#transgender#transsexual#trans man#trans woman#trans joy#trans memes#trans positivity#transmasc#transmasculine#transitioning#transfem#ftm#mtf#nonbinary#enby#agender#hrt#lgbt#mlm#gay#bi#bisexual#queer
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THE FIVE DAYS OF SMUTMAS QUEUE: DAY TWO
Work Shirts - Lawrence Gordon x gn! reader
All right!! This is day two of my silly little christmas celebration, and of course I had to do what I've been procrastinating since basically the start of this account--write a Lawrence reader insert piece!
I love him wholeheartedly despite my lack of fics for him so this has definitely been a long time coming, and this one, much like yesterdays fic, stems from a thought I had—though with this thought, @mrkheartffmans and I went a lil feral together through the reblogs of the original post and thus, the fic concept came to light!
This is also a few years post trap because I was like "yeah working somewhere for a decade is cool but what about a decade and a half??" also—my mentality was that having it set a few years post-trap would be easier to write?? I don't know how true that actually is but it was my thought process lol.
This fic is for audiences of 18+, so minors, do not interact!
Fic type- this is mostly--almost entirely--smut. There's also angst if you squint because yeah, angst was bound to be present somewhere lol
Warnings- unprotected sex (reader is on BC), and as per usual, the reader is GN for all intents and purposes (petnames included), but I went with AFAB anatomy as that's the anatomy that I know best.
Lawrence wishes he could act like the surprise on the faces of his coworkers when he mentioned having the last two weeks of December off came as a surprise to him, but he can't and he kind of hates that.
Of course people are bound to be a little surprised by it. In the decade and a half that he's worked at Angels of Mercy, the only incident where he took any sizeable amount of time off was while he was recovering from the bathroom trap and could hardly stand, let alone walk like he used to.
But, in the three years since the bathroom trap and aside from that month long period where he allowed himself to recover before going back to work, he'd not taken a single day away. Being at work, seeing to patients and talking to people—even just going to work and filling out miscellaneous paperwork while he sat in the isolation of his office—kept his mind busy and his hands busier.
He came home from work every night and saw you, which just made his entire day as it were. You'd order food or make something quick and just spend your time lounging on the couch, occasionally get a little flirty, and laugh when Lawrences hands started wandering how they used to in the days of your masters degree and his days of medical school.
But, because of a backlog of PTO and the fact that he'd been overworking himself almost to the bone with the onslaught of people needing medical care during the last three months of the year, Lawrence decided to book the 14th through to the 2nd of January off so that he could get some rest and worry about housework so that you didn't have to worry at all, where you normally split the housework fifty-fifty.
Lawrence knew that your marketing job got really, really stressful during the last month of the year. People always unearthed different versions of themselves come the holidays, and all he wanted was for you to come home from your workday and not have to worry about menial things like a messy bathroom counter, week-old leftovers in need of throwing away or dishes not yet moved from the dishwasher to the cupboards.
He gets called into work for an emergency on the 21st, and after running to grab groceries during the afternoon on the 22nd, he's delighted to find what he does waiting for him in the bed you share.
You're typically home from work at around seven, sometimes eight thirty on particularly busy days, and when Lawrence arrives home, it's half past eight.
He goes into your bedroom, having indeed hoped to see you there or at least get a call about work running late with the promise of more details upon your arrival at home as he enters your shared bedroom, but what he sees is so much better than anything he could've hoped for.
You're sitting on the bed, back pressed against the head board, focused on whatever romance book you'd plucked from a charity bookstore on your way home, but it's not what you're reading that Lawrence really takes note of.
No, it's not the book at all, though he does note that the title makes it seem like something from either the regency or the victorian era. It's what you're wearing.
You're wearing the shirt he wore to work the previous day, buttons undone with the cufflinks you'd gifted him for christmas the year his residency ended still holding the sleeves of the shirt together, the duvet covering your legs and hips, which makes Lawrence assume you've stolen a pair of his sweatpants in addition to the shirt.
He knocks, lightly, on the side of the door, and you startle, looking up to the source of the knock and relaxing the minute you see his face.
"You startled me," you say, grinning and closing your book over your thumb so as not to lose your place. "I remember you told me you'd be getting groceries around when I would get home, so I stole one of your shirts and settled in. Figured we could order Thai food or something to that effect, have a late dinner and relax."
Lawrence runs his tongue over his lips, notices the keen way with which you watch him do it.
"Yeah," he grins, further enters the room. "That sounds lovely. I grabbed the last of the necessary ingredients for dinner Christmas Day so that you wouldn't have to worry—I know that work has been something of a mess for you lately and I want to make sure you have the opportunity to relax when you come home."
He approaches the bed, watches you place the book you'd been reading open on your nightstand beneath the lamp.
"I don't deserve you," you laugh.
You've been dating since you were starting up with your masters a year after getting your bachelors degree when you were twenty-three and Lawrence was two years into medical school at twenty-four.
You've been married since you were twenty-five and twenty-six, and seventeen years down the line, you both knew that marrying each other was the best possible thing either of you could've done with regard to the romantic part of your lives, and while you were married you ended up doing the best possible things for your respective careers so it worked in both of your favors regardless.
You were Lawrences rock, especially so in the aftermath of the bathroom trap, and he was yours and would be such forevermore.
"You're right," he says, moving away from the bed to grab a pair of sweatpants. "You deserve more, but I do strive to be what you deserve day in and day out."
"Don't say that," you chide. "You're perfect, Lawrence. I wouldn't've married you had I thought otherwise, I promise."
He can feel your gaze on him as he slips out of the khaki pants he wears, deciding to go commando and put a pair of light gray sweatpants on for comfort. He changes out of the black button up he'd chosen to wear, pulls a baggy dark blue Henley over his torso and climbs into bed beside you, pressing kiss after kiss down the line of your jaw and across your neck.
"How stressful has work been?" He asks, tone genuine but also slightly seductive.
"Oh, so stressful," you laugh, knowing exactly what he's doing and the fact that seeing you in one of his shirts and just one of his shirts has spurred that on by a mile. "I think if I have to hear one more coworker complaining about last minute shopping during the last few days before Christmas Eve or even on Christmas Eve in and of itself, I will start causing heads to roll. December is the worst time to be in the offices because everyone stops caring about year-end quotas and making sure things are good going into next year and starts caring about whatever gossip is being spread around. It's dreadful, Lawrence."
He pauses, looking at you with genuine sympathy in his gaze. "I'm sorry—I feel gross. I didn't mean to attempt to proposition you for sex like that. I really do want to hear about your day and I'm sorry it's been so terrible, my love. Are you going to book time off?"
You grin. Lawrence is ever-so considerate, always apologizing and stepping back if he's done something in a way that he doesn't appreciate midway through.
"You're going to be stuck with me from tomorrow through to the second," you say. "And—for the record, I didn't hate it. I like it when you proposition me for sex with kisses because your kisses are quite honestly one of the best parts of being married to you. Plus, I have had a stressful month and I won't lie and say that my current outfitting was just for comfort. Sure, bare ass on satin sheets is an amazing feeling, but I was hoping that I'd get the reaction I did, admittedly."
Lawrence tilts his head inquisitively. "You're not—you're—I thought you'd taken a pair of my sweatpants," he grins, moves a hand to your thigh. Sure enough, it's bare. "Oh, Christmas must've come early."
You laugh. "You fuckin' wish," you say, ignoring the goosebumps that Lawrences touch brings on.
You unbutton the few buttons done up on the shirt, press your back against the headboard.
"Stressful month, yeah baby?" Lawrence is almost beaming as his hand moves from your thigh to your stomach, lazily perusing up your chest.
You clench your jaw, squeeze your arms against your sides because you are not going to give in to your handsome husband and his illustrious whims just with a few touches and some whispered sentiments.
"So stressful, Lawrence," you nod. "So, so stressful."
"Do you need a way to destress?" His thumb and first finger locate your nipple, and you exhale a breathy moan, quiet and already wanting to give in to his whims. "If you do, I think I could be of assistance."
"Lawrence," you moan, quiet and needy. "Oh, fuck, Lawrence."
Lawrence moves his hand away from you for a second, only to take off his shirt and the sweatpants he wears before he's back to kissing your neck and letting his hands roam across your chest.
A few minutes of much the same passes by, Lawrences kisses lining your neck and jawline and face and your ethereal lips while he rolls your nipples between his fingers. His hand dips to your folds for just a few minutes, taking your slick onto his fingers and laughing against your shoulder.
"You're so wet for me already," he says. "Fuck, you're perfect."
"Wanna ride you," you're almost stunned at how evenly the words fall from your lips but not at all stunned when Lawrence agrees.
He pulls you onto his lap, lets you grind against his half-hard cock until it's fully hard and you're begging to feel him inside of you and moans when you bottom out, gaze watching you intently as his hands settle on your hips.
"Lawrence," you whisper. "Fuck."
A smile spreads onto Lawrences face before he can stop it, and when you start riding him, he presses his back against the headboard, one hand on your hip while the other lightly holds your chin so as to keep your gaze on his.
You get lost in how good it feels within the space of a minute, maybe two—Lawrence's cock is long and thick, and even if riding it takes some adjusting occasionally, it still becomes very enjoyable very quickly.
"You're so wonderful for me, Y/N," he says. "Oh, this never gets old."
He's loving how you feel around him, clenching occasionally and moaning after a particularly deep thrust that hits your g-spot, and you're just—it's just perfect.
And then, Lawrence gets an idea. He moves the hand that's cupping your face to your wrist, which is attached to the hand that you use to grope relentlessly at yourself, rolling your nipples between your thumb and first finger, sometimes moving to rub your clit.
"The cufflinks, baby," he says. "Don't touch yourself, mm? Use those for me."
He watches you press the cold silver cufflink against one of your nipples, moans as you clench around him at the sensation of the cold meeting your warm skin. You moan in turn, pressing the metal against your nipples and moaning his name.
He moves a hand back to your chin, placing his first and middle finger against your bottom lip. You take the hint immediately and bring his fingers into your mouth, grinding down onto him as you do.
"You're so good for me, pet," he says, moving the hand that rests on your hip to your clit. He starts rubbing it with practiced expertise, knowing the way you like it best after nearly two decades of marriage. "Oh, this is amazing. You can steal my work shirts whenever you want, okay? Especially the ones with the cufflinks. You're amazing."
You moan at the praise, pressing the cufflinks against yourself further, loving the way that the metal feels against your sensitive nipples.
He takes his fingers out of your mouth and goes back to holding your chin so as to keep your gaze on his, wanting to watch you orgasm.
You come completely undone when Lawrence speeds up his ministrations on your clit just enough to make you want more, and Lawrence watches.
You thrust your way through the aftershocks, at which point Lawrence releases into you and lets your chin free from his light grip, kissing you and offering praise as he does.
He pulls you off of him and gets a bath set up, helping you into it while giving you more praise and pressing kisses along the back of your neck and shoulder blades because the orgasm had left you both completely and totally breathless.
You bathe in light conversation, once again talking about your days but focusing on the more positive parts, and Lawrence lets you steal a Henley from the days of medical school. You pull a pair of boxers on and curl up in bed next to him, falling asleep only seconds before Lawrence does.
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thank u for the tag @lesbianjudasiscariot <33333!!!!! shuffle ur spotify on repeat playlist & let it predict the coming year – the first 12 songs represent ur 2024 this is actually so fun i LOOOOOVE music tag games so much. insert that i love music music is life music is everything twitter thread.
january – the man who sold the world by david bowie; reconnection with my former self ABSOLUTELYYYY 💪💪💪 starting off great
february – point and kill by little simz; basically saying "whatever i want, i'm gonna get it" if u bring the song down to its bare essentials (disregarding all of the cultural references and experiences bc i'm not nigerian and i can't apply them to myself). so if we're going off of basics irt song meaning we're still going strong 👍
march – shadow (i'm breaking down) by destroy boys; noooooo we're going downhill
april – stick season by noah kahan; well. we're officially at the low point i guess 😞
june – (you) on my arm by leith ross; basically longing for and longing to be with someone...coincides with how i usually feel around june/summer actually so. probably accurate.
july – this is why by paramore; well okay 😐
august – lava lamp by lolo zouaï; i knew this one was gonna make the list i've played this sm since it came out but what the song's about.. basically i'm in a relationship that i'm not satisfied with. ellipsis ellipsis ellipsis
september – not my fault by reneé rapp and megan thee stallion; FUN TIMES AND CONFIDENCE HELL YEAH 🙏
october – the moon will sing by the crane wives; well if this song prediction has told me anything it's that romantic relationships will NOT work out for me..
november – imaginando by eno, morad, and mero; (banger song btw) this one is about resilience and the power of dreaming/imagining from what little i can personally understand from it, so we're definitely back on the uptick 👆 and in my birthday month!
december – tv by alex g; an absent father and suppressing feelings...
well we're not closing off with a bang that's for sure but i think overall this in its entirety isn't THAT bad 😎💪
tagging @miseria-fortes-viros @musicscum @mnwlk @miufilm & @dickggansey IF u all want to <333!!!
#i'm not sure abt the overall message of imaginando bc i can only understand the spanish parts but that's a part of it so i'm going off that#thanks 4 tagging me again this was really fun❤!!!!!#r.txt#tag games <3
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us. - spike jonze
a/n: this was supposed to be a little thing bc i was bored but jesus it got long 😭😭
i <3 spike sm gang you have no idea this was so fun
its a teeny bit specified bc i made it as if it were from my own point of view but i did try and make it more general so i could post it
please please please request spike gang i <3 him
summary
you - a famous musician - are being interviewed, and the inevitable question comes up:
"what's the story behind yourself and spike jonze?"
and this is your answer.
warnings/notices to consider
none that i'm aware of, need to properly proofread
★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★
mine and spike's love story started in walt whitman high, maryland.
it was early november, i was 15, he was 16 - just a few months older than me, him being born in late october and me being born in mid december, so we were still in the same year group. we didn't fully acknowledge each other until we had to. of course, we had a few classes together in the past and even when we met - we both took the film class - but we never really spoke.
until a new club was introduced: film club.
it ran every day at lunch in a big ish room through a back door in the music department (where i usually was anyway). as it turns out, the administration just needed a use for the room in order to keep it there. no one in the school actually cared about film study. except for two little media nerds in 5th year. me, a freak, a loner, an outcast, and adam spiegel - but by 4th year everyone called him spike jonze (that was a nickname the local storeowner gave him - seemingly this stuck for quite a while).
he was always hanging around with these crazy students, i remember one of them was actually jeff tremaine. they were wild, but spike mostly kept to himself and was more just there for the antics rather than partaking (but we know he was - and still is - a fucking menace to society).
back to the big ish room - neither of us were entirely sure what to do, both of us being sort of shy and reserved in our day to day. once we realised that no one else was showing up, we started to talk. we introduced ourselves, discussed our favourite films and hit it off immediately. i don't know about him, but that day i knew we were starting something special. after about a week i'd developed a crush on spike - he was funny, sweet, charming and a gentleman - but did i plan on telling him? did i fuck. but to be fair i didn't have to. it was made glaringly obvious once we started hanging out and being friends outside that big ish room. everyone could see right through me. including spike himself. to this day he still teases me about how sweet my "puppy crush" on him was back in the day. and he still gets reminded that he wasn't any better, blushing and chuckling at what was essentially my every word like the inexperienced 16 year old he was.
he made all the first moves (which i like to remind him of every time he brings up my "heart eyes") - he asked me to the movies (he introduced me to what would become my all time favourite film to this day), he took me for ice cream on the beach (one with stones, not sand - he's always known i hate sand - and linked our pinkies as we walked since he was too nervous to hold my hand properly), gave me his jacket when i got even one shiver (he was freezing the whole time because he refused to take his jacket back), and finally kissed me ever so softly on the lips when we arrived back at my doorstep (he was shaking from nerves and cold, but his lips were still warm and soft, just like they are now - he put his hand on my cheek as the other held my own and my foot popped just like in those old romance movies we both adored back then). i was 16 too by then, it was january when our first date came around. but from the second his lips gently pressed against mine, as soon as i felt him against me, as soon as i felt his breath on my face i knew i couldn't find anyone better to spend my life with. in that moment i knew he was my soulmate. cheesey i know, but i knew then that we would be us.
after that the rest is pretty much history: we graduated together the at 18, moved away for college and in with each other at 19, graduated again at 23 - which was also when i finally released that song i wrote for our second anniversary. and guess what? it got big. that song went popular so fast, and so did spike. not long after we graduated (me with music and production, him with film and english) spike made his first big music video (for me, might i add) and after that he kept them coming, as did i. we got famous in the blink of an eye almost, it was amazing.
until it wasn't for a while.
by the time we were 24 (i know, not that long huh?) we'd both got too wrapped up in our work and got too overwhelmed to the point of snapping. we were exhausted, not meaning a thing we said but still throwing our words out like daggers. we broke up, and the following year was the worst of my life. we had broken up for 1 year, 4 months, 2 weeks and 3 days. i kept track of every day i had been without him, kept track of every day i was left in that house alone, every morning i woke up and spike's side of the bed was colder than it had ever been before. it was the worst torture i could imagine, and every song i wrote in that time was about him - whether it was about missing him or wanting him back, they were all for spike. all i wanted was him, but i thought he was done for good and so i left him alone.
that 1 year, 4 months, 2 weeks and 3 days led up to the mtv awards ceremony, the year spike was nominated for outstanding new picture. i had accepted the request for my performance before i knew that spike had been nominated, and by the time i knew it was much too late to back out to make sure he would be peaceful there.
so i went, having gotten dressed up how he loved out of pure habit. i wore a gorgeous black dress with my hair up. i opened with one of my more popular songs before heading to my seat to watch the awards, but i had to fight to keep my eyes away from spike. he looked amazing - smart suit (i think it was a tuxedo), dressy shoes, and his classic adorable messy yet organised hair. the hair that made him look like a puppy. the hair i used to play with as i fell asleep.
when the time came, he did end up winning the award he was nominated for. i was so proud and all i wanted was to turn to him and kiss him with an embrace like i had for past awards we won, but i couldn't even look up to the stage. i wouldn't. i knew if i did i'd break down seeing him so happy without me. his speech was as expected: thanking mtv, talking about the movie, thanking his coworkers... but then he thanked me. i shot up when i heard that, and that was the first time our eyes met in over a year. and you know what? i didn't completely break down (i definitely cried though i'll admit that). i think that was more because of shock.
i'll never forget that speech - i still go back and watch it from time to time when i'm feeling down. he talked about how that perfect, beautiful main character was based on me and how her loser boyfriend was symbolic of himself, he talked about how without me he wouldn't be stood there, how our perfect relationship had impacted him and his work, and how i never left his mind or his heart that whole time we were apart. he told me that our love story could never be written, and to him it would never be over - that it was the most perfect and pure love he'd ever known or felt - and out of all of his speech, what he said at the end hit me harder than anything:
"i just want you to know that i'll always have a piece of you in me. always."
it hit me then - he felt the same way that i did. all that time we felt the same. he missed me. after his speech the ceremony went on, i closed it out with a slight shake in my voice, singing a song i wrote about missing him (which he swears didn't make him cry, but his eyes were red and wet later that night) and i left for the afterparty. this was the first time in my life i'd gone to a party with no intention of drinking. my goal was to make a beeline for spike, and i needed a clear head for that. which is exactly what i did.
i found him in a corner with his head down, i said his name to get his attention. he looked up with those sweet, soulful eyes of his, only they were red raw and the light and enthusiasm in them was as low as i'd ever seen. usually full of this gorgeous light that was barely there anymore.
for a moment we just stood there, looking at each other, noticing every difference and change since we last were together - then all we did was hold each other. we stood there for so long, my face in his shoulder, his chin resting on my head, holding each other tight and knowing in that moment we'd never let go again.
we spent that night dancing to any song that came on, laughing like we were never apart. i'll never forget that night when he came home, and i'll never forget waking up in his arms the morning after. every moment since then was just like we were before, barely anything changed at all. that was a number of years ago now, he finally proposed a year after we reconnected and we got married the following year. our twin boys are soon to turn 3 and our girl has just turned 5. spike is working on jackass 2 right now, but he always makes sure we're his first priority. he always comes home early and happy. the kids adore him, and so do i. none of us have ever been happier than we are now, the media's favourite family.
★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★
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Every month of 2023!
i was tagged by @baekslight, @floweruna & @baekhyunnybyun! thank you 🥺
rules: link your favorite and/or most popular post from each month this year <3 (it’s totally fine to skip months!) and tag some CCs you love!
january
my favourite, and most popular, post from this month was my XG shooting star set. for some reason doing an entire set for a music video is really intimidating to me but i think i did well!
feburary
my favourite was this taeyeon weekend set. i wouldn't be tumblr user pinktaeyeon without having this be one of my favs. i think i coloured and sharpened it well. my most popular set was this irene monster set! i'm proud of this one as giffing stages can be SO difficult! i think it came out well.
march
my favourite was this taeyeon happy performance set! my other fav aesthetic other than pink in general is underwater! taeyeon at the aquarium singing ??? a video after my own heart. my most popular set is this nayeon & sana set from the set me free mv.
april
this month was the start of exo activities and i felt in my element. my fav set is this one of baekhyun doing the sorry i'm cute challenge. he's just !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! my most popular set was my le sserafim break the bridge set!!!
may
my taeyeon fine set was my fav from this month. it's one of my favourite taeyeon title tracks and i think i did well making this set considering the video quality is not ! it ! my most popular set from this month was my aespa welcome to my world set. this is actually one of my favourite songs from this year. it's just so stunning.
june
june was A MONTH!!! shinee came back, taeyeon was doing concerts and EXO RELEASED LET ME IN AND HEAR ME OUT!!!! my favourite and most popular post was a set from exo's hear me out mv. this mv was just so special to me. seeing the exos having fun and being silly just meant so much. this set is another fav too. kyungsoo eating a donut gif you're so dear to me.
july
july was peak exo comeback content so i made sooo many sets. it was SO much fun making exo content again so here are a few of my favs 1. chanyeol vs. nails (most popular) 2. chanyeol cream soda mv set 3. exo cream soda performance set from mcountdown (pink shirt, curly haired junmyeon !!!!!!! yeah !) 4. hear me out behind video of baekhyun being a menace
august
my most fav and most popular was my aespa better things set. i loooved this mv so much they all looked gorgeous and the song was so pretty. i loved everything about this release!
september
favourite and most popular is this taeyeon got the beat set. this look.... it's just... so legendary... lives were changed.
october
my favourite post from this month was this set of chanyeol and jongdae in chanyeol's good enough music video. seeing chingu line in yeol's mv really healed something in me. these two sets (cy, ks & jd & chanbaek) are close seconds just bc the good enough mv was so special. my most popular set was this one of taeyeon at the louis vuitton fashion show!
november
taeyeon comeback month!!!!!!!! i made a few sets for her comeback but this one has to be my favourite. she just looks so stunning!!!!! my most popular set was a taylor swift set from the reputation stadium tour!
december
i haven't made much this month but this set of taeyeon's fabulous performance video is my favourite and most popular set! yet again she looks stunning. talented, brilliant, incredible, amazing, show stopping, spectacular, never the same, totally unique, completely not ever been done before etc.
this year has been a really good one for creating. i've genuinely had so much fun making things and also seeing other people make things for my favs too. being able to create for exo and taeyeon specifically has been so much fun!!
anyway if you've read this far, thank you! thank you for enjoying all my silly little gifs and talking to me about my favs. i've enjoyed it so much. i'd like to get to know people better but i'm v shy! but seeing people say nice things in tags has been so lovely.
i hope you have a fun and safe new years if you're doing anything to celebrate, and i wish everyone a healthy and happy new year. 💖
tagging: @tipannies @jaennie @thankyou-taeyeon @sunghanbin @jftk @bu99erfly @dazzlingkai @suuho @ryudaeng @byunbaekhyunie @jsuh @bethereforme no pressure but if i've tagged you i've really enjoyed everything you've made this year! thank you for making such pretty content!
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for the past couple weeks I have tried multiple times to sort out this kind of. thought cloud I'm stuck in. but I can't properly journal out my feelings bc I can't exactly put words to them. I keep trying to get my feelings out with words and it's impossible. so I resort to trying to organize them in pinterest boards and playlists bc those things are more abstract but still help me think through stuff. but even there I'm sort of at a loss. I guess I am coming up on a sense of self for perhaps the first time in my life? and it is so strange and foreign to me that I'm having a hard time. putting it together. for sure it'll take more time. but holy shit it just feels like I am having all these like. epiphones about myself idk how to spell that word whatever. it feels like I'm getting closer and closer to a sense of self. which I have never ever had in my life before. I have always felt like a weird amalgamation of traumas and I have these identity crises every other month wherein I try to reinvent myself and become someone new. and in so doing I have completely just. erased any kind of sense of identity I could have had bc I'm constantly just changing it so nothing I am ever feels permanent. every trait is just temporary and mutable. but last summer, almost a year ago I was finally diagnosed with bipolar disorder and put on mood stabilizers. and after 3 months I started having these like... come back to earth moments where I'd finally be like wait, this isn't me, this isn't what I want. and I'd change it. and slowly I've been doing that with different parts of myself and my life. and then it all kind of came to a head when my ex cheated on me and we broke up and they were gunna attempt suicide and the gun and the hospital and just all of that SHIT happened and then I very suddenly decided to move out bc I couldn't live like that anymore. and then I started seeing my now bf more and more.. and just like wow. it's crazy how drastically my life has changed in a couple months. I mean in January I was in a shitty relationship I didn't see going anywhere with a loser who treated me like shit. I was living with this person and my old roommate and not doing much of anything for enjoyment except scrolling mindlessly through Instagram reels. I used to go to punk shows all the time and one of my epiphones (literally how do you spell that) was that I didn't actually enjoy going to shows that much and the people there weren't really my crowd and I don't want to drink or smoke or any of that. so I stopped going to shows but I never replaced it with something to do enjoy doing. but now... since I left that house and went no contact with my ex and sort of distanced myself from that whole friend group I have been more capable than ever of like, finding myself and who I am and who I want to be. I moved out completely within a week of deciding to do so for my mental health and even though I'm still working these 65 hour weeks and YES my job sucks and makes me wanna die I am still so much less stressed and I am not in literal agony. I used to be so confused with who I am. I used to struggle so hard to see myself as a human being. I was in a near constant state of dissociation due to the horrible trauma I've been through + my dysphoria + bipolar disorder + shitty relationships. Its like I'm waking up now. I keep having these moments where I pause for a moment in reality and I'm like holy shit I'm HERE like I'm alive and I'm present and i am experiencing this moment in this moment. it's just wild to me. i think this is a real turning point in my life. like fr a brand new chapter. a fresh start to everything. I left so much behind and for a while it left me feeling like an empty husk but now I am just starting to see the new little sprouts of life in myself. I'm not having an identity crisis I'm having an identity rebirth.
#barks#sorry to get all deep on the dashboard#id put this in my journal but my laptop isnt working 🙄🙄
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Fic Writing Review 2023 🌈
tagged by @itwoodbeprefect - i have also been thinking about this so thank you for taking the initiative!
tagging @faorism @gallantrejoinder if you'd care to do this in any form (including as writing/art review)!
Words and Fics (on ao3) 📚
words posted: 52,220, apparently. Which is actually... basically last year's but minus 10k because I didn't do H50 Big Bang this year, because med school. most things in my life now can be stated as 'because med school'. (actually I just realised I didn't do it last year either, but that was because I was already finishing a 10k H50 fic. so my point stands)
fics posted: either 6 or 29, depending on whether one counts the advent calendar as one fic or 24. plus 3 posted only on Tumblr.
first fic: love don't treat you like that (babe, I'm letting you know) (H50). on the NINTH of january, apparently. i've already lost my first-fic-of-the-year contest to last year, unless i unexpectedly finish something today.
last fic: Advent Calendar 2023 / ...Zaph Kilkane, the pre-eminent climate scientist of the 22nd century...
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Ships and Fandoms ⚓
would you believe I literally did not repeat a fandom this year, outside of the advent calendar. and this year's AC had the most fandoms since 2019.
Hawaii Five-0 (McDanno)
NCIS: LA (Sallen)
Starsky & Hutch (S/H)
House MD (Hilson)
MASH (Punnihawk)
and then AC-only ones:
Star Trek (Spirk)
The Man From UNCLE (Napollya)
911 (Buddie)
Due South (i don't know ship names. are there ship names? Fraser/RayK)
Good Omens (Azcrow)
Leverage (thiefsome)
Almost Paradise (Ernesto/Alex. alesto. i'm coining it)
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Top 5 Fics by Kudos 🏆
I mean, I have 6 posted fics that can be kudosed separately.
love don't treat you like that (babe, I'm letting you know) (H50)
When You're Loving Me (That's When I'm Loving You) (NCIS: LA)
Advent Calendar 2023 (see above. nine fandoms)
my powers of expression and thoughts so sublime / could never do you justice in reason or rhyme (House MD)
Finding A Cure In You (S&H)
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Top 5 Favorite Fics 💖
okay, I'm going to count distinct chapters of the advent calendar for this. in no particular order and subject to mood change:
When You're Loving Me (That's When I'm Loving You) (NCIS: LA) - I cited this as a contender for my favourite fic I've written a couple months ago, so obviously it has to go in the year's. what can i say, fake dating is an immaculate trope, and this also all came onto the page very easily which is always vaguely miraculous.
there you go pulling me right back in (H50) - sometimes vague prompts i've had down for ages write up as something that's. fine, but a bit clunky, and I just have to move on bc it's the advent calendar and a new fic each day. sometimes I start writing them and they spring into life with joyous delight. or in this case, uninhibited grumpiness and love.
singing yesterday's songs wishing i could be with you tonight (MASH) - the one that didn't make it into the top 5 kudosed, I assume partially due to being locked and partially due to being a serious tone, not terribly shippy, and Peg POV. But I've had some version or other of it for a long time, it's one of those stories I'm genuinely proud of, and I was glad to finally post it.
Totally Normal (Due South) - it's fun. it was fun. I was slightly nervous about it, because the only prior Due South thing I'd written was Dief POV and this was Fraser and RayK POV and the first time writing either of those, but it turns out watching + liveblogging four and two seasons, respectively, of a character in four months is. enough to cement their voices in my head. it was unexpectedly easy and also. fun.
Festive Spice (MUNCLE) - i just think it epitomises the advent calendar. in the words of coolbreezemage, 'yesssss bake cakes and kiss your partner'.
HMs:
Finding A Cure In You (S&H) - this doesn't make it to the above list due to the fact that I haven't actually managed to reread it since I posted it. but just for the amount of time I spent with it, how different it is to my usual M.O. of writing, and the weird way I wrote it (entirely in the notes app, with almost zero rereading while writing), I have to somehow mention it.
A Thousand Words / To Be Spared (Good Omens) - I don't know if they're favourite but I do think they're good. and the format of to be spared was pleasingly experimental and i think it worked.
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Fandom Fic Events 🤝
also the Starsky & Hutch SHarecon zine! which the zine still holds copyright on, but will be posted in April.
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Projects for 2024 👀
mmm gonna sort this differently and also ramble
Ones that will definitely be finished in 2024 and if they aren't you have free rein to come to my house and tie me to a chair come November: MUNCLE wip, The Unwitting Truth Affair/The Honesty Affair, I haven't actually decided which title yet;
Starsky & Hutch, the still-unnamed Huggy & Pete wip.
Ones I have both hope and some amount of faith will be finished in 2024 and if they aren't you have free rein to come into my inbox and harass me about them: Hawaii Five-0 wip, Much Ado About Something (*salutes squares*);
other Hawaii Five-0 wip, state of disrepair. yes, I'm manifesting state of disrepair 2024. probably november/december 2024, but i'm manifesting it anyway;
Leverage wip, all that I want is a kind heart to haunt
Ones I would like to be finished in 2024, and if my brain decides it likes them might be, but all you have free rein for is to politely ask me about them once per business month: Hawaii Five-0 cath/steve/danny pwp, Wait A Minute Let Me Take You There;
horny S&H wip, Previews Of Your Body Driving Me Insane;
S&H Vanessa coda, so cordial / so rotten (don't ask me);
Good Omens wip, love won't you be as you've always been
Ones I don't expect to finish in 2024 but would like to get some words down in: angsty S&H wip, Relentless As The Rain;
ridiculous undercover H50 wip, Four Seasons of Love;
other ridiculous H50 wip, The Irritating, Annoying, Infuriating, (Effective) Seduction Techniques of One Steven J. McGarrett;
SPN ..wip? depending on the time limit on 'progress'?, Smells Like Turpentine.
vague thoughts: i'd like to write a full-length (for whatever value of that. the AC ones actually were full-length, especially the second one, but what I really mean is AC-independent) due south fic. they're very weird and i enjoyed writing them, and I'd also like to write something with RayV in it. maybe if I successfully inspired @itwoodbeprefect to write new ds, when she does that it will inspire me to write something, and we can set up a ping-pong game. no, wait, that's mixing fandoms.
I expect more MUNCLE fic. this one's already 3.5k and rocketing along, and i'm only two-thirds of the way through season 1. what form that will take i don't know at this stage but we'll see.
....i was discussing the vague concept of house/h50 crossover fic with squares literally yesterday and on the one hand I haven't written a crossover since 2014 and also don't want that to be my legacy, but on the other hand i think there is at least a 50% chance it's going to stick in the back of my brain and keep niggling.
#someone: plays ping-pong. me: nice starsky & hutch reference#mine#my writing#tag games#Hawaii Five 0#The Man From UNCLE#MASH#Starsky & Hutch#NCIS: LA#i will not tag literally every fandom mentioned here bc that would just be a) mean and b) tiring
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Hii this is going to sound random, but since when have you been writing on tumblr? 🥲 And congrats on your 700 follower milestone 🤩🥂
TYSM BABE 🤪💓
i started writing since january, more like ever since the second season of aib came out, but then i took like a 2 month break from writing bc shit going on yk, and came back like on april-may to start writing for jjk, i’ve been on tumblr like for a year, just to read, mostly jjk.
i had a great time writing for chishiya, it was super fun since a lot of people liked my content. but once i started writing for jjk i turned rlly insecure since it’s a much bigger community with such amazing writing i can’t compare, i have a lot of mutuals i wish to be as an amazing writers as they are. i wrote for jjk like 3 times before i started writing for titans, just for dick grayson. it was pretty fun too, since it’s also a small community and mostly un-active i received a lot of support from it. but, if i’m being honest, i like the jjk community much more. i made a lot of friends on the way, maybe not as much support or hits like i did with other fandoms, but this one has been really fun, i have so much fun with my mutual and some blogs motivated me to become a better writer to be as big as some creators. so that’s why i appreciate so so much the support i receive from people that follow me. really helps me so much as a non english speaker. it’s really cheesy ik, but writing has become an important part of my life ever since quarantine and my mental problems i had/have. i started writing for myself but then for others once my therapist told me i’m good at writing, but i didn’t realize how difficult it is to write and express yourself in another language. i’ve been studying english ever since kindergarten and i still feel like it’s not enough, most of the people won’t read this, but it feels good saying it, this is is most of an appreciation post rather than a ‘oh i’m so jealous i hate all the blogs’, no. this is a post to appreciate and thank all people who have been supporting me for the very first time, sooo, it’s really amazing tbh.
here are some writer i admire A LOT and are the ones to motivate be to become a better writer.
@kazushawty @lov3rbody @satoruhour @violetsaffron5 @c0pkiller @getousex @romantichomicide95
#gojo satoru smut#toji fushiguro smut#geto suguru smut#megumi fushiguro smut#sukuna smut#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu kaisen smut#gojo satoru#toji fushiguro#geto suguru#megumi fushiguro#sukuna#thank you so much for the support 🩷
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The week he came to visit in January was one of, if not the, best weeks of my life. I couldn’t describe you to the joy it brought me to see him in my apartment, to make coffee with him, to cuddle and watch a movie together. It was indescribable joy. I couldn’t believe I had gotten so lucky.
The night before he left I sobbed uncontrollably bc he hadn’t proposed and I thought he might (it was a totally immature thing to expect, nothing on him). I was so in love, I was ready to leave everything and move to the US and start a new life. He said he wanted to get married, we were quote “unofficially engaged”, had plans to spend our lives together.
I never, ever, ever could have expected we’d break up. Much less, me being the one to initiate it. Despite all the pain, it still hurts less than being repeatedly hurt by him and the familiar betrayal of having someone who was suppose to love me hurt me so deeply.
I remind myself the thing that I miss - our happy relationship- didn’t exist anymore. Me breaking it off wasn’t what severed the relationship.
I also accept my own role in things. But it’s still so hard.
Months later, I still get struck with waves of grief - only now is the total of what I’ve lost settling in.
To have someone that accepted me, loved me, wanted to marry me - I couldn’t believe my luck. And now it’s all gone.
We’re still friends but he doesn’t seem that interested in talking to me lately (which is his own choice obviously, he has no obligation to of course). It just fucking hurts. It fucking hurts that it seems like I’m still reeling and he seems over it.
I never thought in a million years I’d ever find myself in this place. The hurt and pain is so so deep.
I don’t know if I’ll ever recover, much less love someone like him again. I’m worried this was it for me - I’m grateful for the love I got to experience, but I fear expecting to have it happen again is just going to set me up for more heartbreak.
I’ve never been so lonely, but I need to accept it. I need to accept being alone and accepting it may always be like this.
What we had is gone. The love I felt and shared is never coming back.
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YEAR IN REVIEW | 2023
To be honest, I think 2023 belongs in the same garbage bin 2020 is rotting in. It started out fine. But as we reached the end, it got worse and worse. Still, I cannot resist looking back as I do every year.
While I did not achieve all my goals this year, I did do one: graduation. This is my greatest achievement, and one I’m super proud of. There’s also the one I almost achieved: finishing E04 of SNTM. I almost did it! Only a few videos left, which I hope to finish by February. But you know how it is: make plans, life runs over them. Anyway, here's what happened in the world of ironicscavenger in 2023.
THE HIGHTLIGHT
I’m not sure there was one on the blog itself, but I did graduate as a psychologist. However, I talked enough about that. Just know it was the highlight of my year. My mom said she hadn't seen me that genuinely happy in a while.
MY FAVORITE POST PER MONTH
Well, then, these are my favorite post for each month. Just to clarify, however many notes they got does not influence the decision to include them. As you can see, there are many gaps. Life got overwhelming this past couple of months. So, there’s very little done. Anyway, here goes.
January | I took an unexpectedly long hiatus and just played videogames for a while. So the end of the holiday special is the only post I got.
February | I made a sim for @madebycoffee’s BC.
March | Not a thing. Just two reblogs the entire month.
April | I was having problems with my computer and could not get back to sim stuff. But I did say hi, at least.
May | I worked on the Emerson story a bit. Also, I got a diagnosis for a problem I’ve been having all my life. The answers to a lot of questions, finally.
June | Once again, not a thing. I was finishing up school, and it was impossible to do anything but focus on that.
July | Same thing. Two reblogs, and that’s it.
August | It gets interesting again. I finished school, got a bit of a makeover for the blog, and got more active on social media.
September | SNTM got back, and I took some screens of Saffron and Piper in Chestnut Ridge. Honestly, it was just an excuse to put Piper on cowboy boots and cowboy hat. No regrets. Also, I decided to set up a discord server.
October | I had an incredible time at simblreen. But I honestly, I think everything stopped after the bombardments happened. I have mostly been blogging about Palestine since. So, you know, Free Palestine.
November | I published my simblreen treats (1 & 2 | 3), and kept reblogging about Palestine.
December | I did not feel the holiday spirit. I just had a quiet weekend with my parents and cousins that my mom was taking care of. SNTM came back again. Still talking about Palestine.
SNTM
Not a lot happened, but we are so close to finishing the episode. After I did a poll to decide the show's fate, I got a green light from all of you to make some changes. But I admit I’m not sure what I want to do yet. For now, the show goes on as it is. There’s a special episode that I’ve been planning since the beginning, and I really want to do it in video format. But it takes a lot on me. We shall see what happens.
Thank You!
This was not an easy year, but you guys are still here, following me. That’s gotta be some kind of miracle. I love you all so much. Even when it gets tough, I could never abandon this community. I’ll still be here, even when I no longer have anything to offer.
GOODBYE 2023! HELLO 2024!
May it bring us peace. That’s my only wish.
Past Reviews: 2022 | 2021 | 2020 | 2019 | 2017
#year in review#ts4#sims#ts4 edit#simblr#long post#i hope things get better#we cannot keep having this world changing events#i am so tired
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chat I can go ON about why theyre equal to me.
I love them both bc they gave us so much different dynamics despite knowing how everyone is with each other in other smps
both seasons mean so much to me and I can explain why if someone wants to listen
thats A LIE ill do it anyone, this is my blog & if you have notifs on then thats your fuckin problem expect me to go on for hours if I wanted to.
ONTO THE TALKING
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S1 the season I didnt watch while it was active. I started watching Geminitay, empires smp s1 after it had ended. Originally, while it was still coming out with new episodes, I was watching Lizzie. I got up to right before the Xornoth appearances before I stopped watching because as much as I loved Lizzie, i put two and two together that at the time I wasnt a fan of smps that were new and preferred watching my past, such as Lizzies crazycraft series.
Mind you, I was also a lot more into anime and was actively watching KNY at the time that esmp s1 came out. I was also going through my freshman year of Highschool and right before sophomore year.
Well, we move onto post s1, pre s2, and I decide "Why not pick this series back up? Maybe someone else out of curiosity of expanding who I watch on youtube." well. I picked s1 up post sophomore year and right before my junior year. I finished s1 Fwhip (I am on a mission of watching everyones s1, Ive gone through Shelby (x2), Katherine, Gem (x2), and Fwhip). A month later, s2 started and I started actively watching Shelby and Gem for s2. At one point, in December, I fell behind on episodes because my great grandmother died and I had finals going on as well. Around the start of January I pick it back up from the Festival so I can refresh my own memory.
Cue March 2023, Junior year of highschools for Icarus when I recieve the absolute worst news of my life: My childhood best friend, the one I could always count on, my dog died. S2 ended right before my birthday and I now am in my finale year of highschool, without my dog thats been with me since I was child and getting hit by a train every other week due to sn act class that I only need to graduate.
If s3 of empires smp comes around I hope all of you will be prepared to listen to me sobbing over c!Shelby and c!Gem AGAIN becauze theyre my little fellas and I love them too much for my own good and cc!Shelby has gotten me through the past few months when I havent been my best.
Empires smp is a comfort series for me, and Area Unknown has found its way right next to esmp. Aimsey & Guqqie have become comfort streamers right next to Shelby in the sense that I can watch their vods and I feel content with life and where Im at.
Empires has been there for me these past few years when I didnt think I had anyone else. Empires has lead me to meet some of the best people I've come to be friends with. Empires has connected me to people I never thought I would ever befriend, and Im so thankful for it.
All of you fucks have to thank Empires for me being on Tumblr too.
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