#i spent SO much time on that drawing just for twitter to be like 'hm. you did not upload when I say so. Therefore no one shall see it'

[prettyokwizard]

it's on me for uploading my elden ring x witch hat drawing to twitter at a bad algorithm time, so traction on it was really really bad compared to my other posts. BUT. Shirahama sensei finding it and liking it does make up for it. Thank you for going through tags and making artists like me have a good day <3

[thefaiao]

Do you remember what hooked you on the LISA series? It's a decently impactful set of games so I'm curious as to why you've created so many drawings from it

A great question. I don't think I can answer this with absolute precision, but I'll try. I'll begin explaining how exactly I first got into drawing LISA, and we'll work from there to the reason I believe I am still compelled to draw more of it.

I first played and finished LISA at the end of 2016. I was decently active at that point, but hadn't garnered much attention to my drawings. I had made a Hotline Miami post that had gotten decently popular, and a few Yogscast(1)(2)(3) drawings that also did decently well, but overall nothing super noteworthy. Most Yog fans at the time weren't into what I liked mainly, which was Shadow of Israphel.

I was immature at the time, so had a hard time connecting with people in fandoms. Not to mention, I was a Brasilian in a sea of Americans and Europeans. You'd be surprised how hard it was to relate with people in that setting, but I tried here and there.

I felt pretty strongly about the HM post though, since it felt like a great personal achievement. I felt a drawing I had a clear vision for had achieved what I set out to do with it. Seeing how much people liked it, it was pretty magical when you've never had a post "do well".

Anyway, people were hopping out of tumblr and onto twitter, and I did as well. Twitter, despite everything, sort of puts you way closer to other people. Your reply to someone important is very visible and hard to ignore. It was a type of equalizer. There I had gotten to get my drawings actually seen and shared by Austin, the guy who made the LISA games.

Having had my drawings shared and recognized that way had a strong impact on me, and I even got to talk with an artist I really looked up to at the time, Maren, who had also gotten into LISA. She had done art for SBFP and TF2, so it felt surreal to me to be acknowledged by someone like that. Up to that point I really felt like more of a passive observer to everything.

In 2014 I finished high-school, and 2015 I spent the whole year learning how to draw better. I tried so hard that I ended up dissociating, a very scary emotion, that I didn't even know was a thing at the time. It felt like all that time and effort was starting to pay off, and that there was a way forward here.

First I posted sketches, and the passion I had for the game and motivation from the recognition led me to put a lot more effort than usual into my drawings. I ended up making these, which got really popular, it was very validating.

So because of all that I kept drawing. I'll be honest, a lot of the time I just wanted to get even more of the attention of these weird new cool popular friends that were paying attention to me for some reason. I was very lonely at the time. I think I stayed lonely for a long time after too.

But eventually people move on, as is normal with fandoms. I didn't really feel my passion for drawing and LISA die out though. I had started a massive LISA art project at the time, that took me 5 long years, and also was more focused in college, where I did Game Design.

Drawing wise, eventually I branched out to other RPGmaker games, but LISA was very easy to draw. It was sort of a home-base for me. Something I could come back to when I was uncertain.

I think Urasawa put it quite well, with Billy Bat:

Drawing the same characters over and over is extremely rewarding, and a great way to reflect on your progress so far. I suppose it's meditative, but that's not quite the right word. It's very fun and constructive, and people can also keep track of your progress through that. I did the same with OFF characters, a game I had drawn way before all this.

Of course, I had a lot of issues because of how things developed. I related a lot of my self-worth with the validation I received from people online, and I still do, to an extent...

When I started taking the game I'm making, Meanderer, more seriously, and started living alone, posting anything felt awful. I didn't have the energy for bombastic posts, or the time spent developing the way I draw the characters like I did for LISA, that is, with ease and style. It felt very humiliating, but I understand it was a warped view of things.

It was a long and depressing time in my life, but it taught me a few important lessons, and made me sort of re-evaluate how I engage with "online" overall. But I still liked drawing LISA throughout all of this, I almost felt ashamed of it to a certain point.

All of this isn't to say I didn't love the game itself. It wasn't all just context. I really, really love LISA. It drove me to sobbing tears, which I don't think another game has gotten out of me. It's a fantastic game, that really showed what fresh things you could do with the medium. When I played it I'm not sure I fully understood how much I loved games.

I just grew up with the characters of LISA. Maybe not in my adolescence, but definitely in my adulthood, and with my art. These characters help me orient myself, understand my limits. And it's damn fun to get better at drawing them. Even just a character on an empty blank canvas, with only black and white lines. It's the most fun in the whole world.

To finish it off, I have a general philosophy of not republishing drawings. So whenever I want to do a LISA post I have to draw a LISA post. Just keep drawing and drawing. Don't get hung up on one drawing or idolize one thing you did. Keep making things. It doesn't have to make sense. Just keep drawing.

(There was a power outage while writing this and I had to retype this whole damn post by the way. Appreciate it!)

[luthienmpl]

I'm so sorry pls ignore me if I get annoying I'll just leave some annotations (I was completely normal when I watched LiT but then Century of Love got me with the brainrot and then youtube started suggesting me things and I was like "wait, they're.... they're Thai Haobin? oh.... ok...." and now I'm just hopeless. ;___;)

wait, enlistment?? huh i did not know thailand also did that… is it the same as skorea?

not everyone has to go, they do a public muster in the villages/districts and the eligible guys have to draw from a lottery. If the card is black, you get to stay home, if it's red you're shit out of luck. Daou was unlucky that day. He had to take part in about 3 months of basic training but afterwards only had to come in occasionally for events and camps and stuff. His official enlistment is actually only about to end this month, he's been growing out the buzzcut lately. (he was wearing a wig in Love in Translation. They made him do promo with it on 😫)

"pentor looks SO FAMILIAR and i can't figure out why??? ;A; is he in something else??"

You like FortPeat? Well 😌

He also will be competing in a new Kpop survival show called Starlight Boys on IQIYI soon if that's your thing. Speaking of if that's your thing, the entirety of LazIcon is subbed on Bilibili.

Diamond their maknae very recently dropped a solo single:

On Daou's background: his parents ran a Chinese opera house so he's been singing since he was a kid (and it certainly seems to run in the family). He was in a music club during uni and used to make most of his income by singing in bars. He tried twice to get a spot on Chinese survival shows and spent about 4 months (I think? someone cmiiw) getting some training while he was there, but both shows fell through due to Covid.

My personal favorite of his:

On their honorifics: Offroad mostly calls him P'Ou (that's his original name, he became Da-Ou because there were two more Ous competing in LazIcon) with the occasional Ter thrown in. Daou fluctuates mostly between nong, nuu, and Offroad/Road.

Maybe don't call them phi-nong though. At least not on twitter where Daou can see (he sees everything, man has never touched grass in his life)

When referring to each other they mostly resort to the English "partner". Which, ngl, every time they do I think of this:

and I'd really love to hear the opinion of a native Thai speaker about it at some point.

cries* what is this... poolside actual love confession proposal with rings and pLANNING to commemorate their.. working.. relationship!?!? i'm??

Daou lost his ring back in late June, it yeeted itself off his finger during a stage performance and they couldn't find it afterwards (there's video clips of it going flying). No worries though, Offroad got him a new one the day before the Century of Love final.

Daou was happy about it I guess? 🤷‍♀️

wait both their shows are comphet the series? xDDDD they just swapped who was suffering from it.

they both get over it by ep 5 if that helps any. and while Century of Love definitely has more than enough angst, being a lakorn and all, there's also plenty of fun to be had.

also it's. uh. it's The One With The Fox.

If that helps any. 👀

oh oh my gosh they have auntie fans too??? how adorableeeee!!!?!

@btwinlines has some great (spoiler warning in-depth discussion of Century of Love with screenshots and gifs)posts about that (this one is save) particular topic

now.... how much do i care about looking delulu in public. hm. eh, fuck it.

this is either zero attempt at being subtle or the best cp marketing i've seen in my life wow

I couldn't find the relevant clip as its own video on youtube and i'm too dumb to embed tiktok correctly so just watch the interview bit that starts at 0:50 pls

Daou with his whole chest: "Koojin is a slur actually"

I'm just. I'm just gonna go now. Sorry again.

an introduction to daouoffroad: a record (mostly for me)

so, the lovely @luthienmpl was very kind and gave me a daouoffroad starter pack so i'm gonna learn about them!

i adore finding out about something this way because it's like someone shared their love of The Thing with me! how lovely! how lucky to catch a glimpse of how much joy The Thing gives someone else!!

this is literally just random stream of consciousness thoughts as i watch the videos so i'll spare anyone who isn't interested and put it under a cut.

oh my god they met as contestants on a survival boyband show wtf!? what kind of fanfic kdrama au start is this already!?

ok damn but daou's runs tho :O <3

nooooooo offroad is crying and thanking daou for his support how dARE YOU TOY WITH MY HEART LIKE THIS!? ;A;

ohmygosh is that the actress who plays P'Joy in LITA??? <3

fuck, the pressing the face into the tummy of the one standing thing. why is that so cute. ugh D:<

waitwaitWAIT is that a thing? do directors just... write stories/shows for couples who have good chemistry whatttt?? is this like a thai ent industry staple? (oh i guess mame kind of did that with fortpeat/mutrak) that's so funny omg. xDDD

laz1 is so kpop styled :O and i must add Last Kiss to my playlist imMEDIATELY its such a pretty song?? <3333

thiS BRIDGE i AM FEELING IT!?!?! DAOU WHAT IS THAT RIFF!?!??! HOLY SHIT THAT WAS SUCH A SMOOTH TRANSITION UP TO THE HIGH NOTE!? *O* <3

(was daou already an established singer before or something?? boy has pIPES!)

*faintly* d-did he try to... bite... the cat's... paw??

/SCREAMS nO THE HARMONIES yeah ok i'm a fan weLP THA TWAS QUICK

(i'm such a sucker for vocal line groups ugh dammit TwT)

wait, enlistment?? huh i did not know thailand also did that... is it the same as skorea?

oh-- oh my god he sent flowers? through his sister?? *whispers* that's so sweet ;u;

goodness, offroad literally running and jumping into daou's arms while daou is still in military fatigues-- guys this is either zero attempt at being subtle or the best cp marketing i've seen in my life wow

awww did offroad bring his graduation gown to the event just so he could get pics with daou?? that's so cute! ;A;

okAY SIR?? SIR NO the sleeping right pressed up to offroad as he pretends to snore but like daou is just paSSED OUT HALF ON TOP OF HIm NO SIR NO I CANNOT HANDLE THIS NOPE BYE

(the cut right as daou reaches up to shut offroad up had me cracking up tho, they've got a wicked sense of humour i really like them)

ahahahah the members playing along is really cute!! poor daou has to be relegated to the "jealous bf" -- this is SO interesting to watch coming out of old kpop fandom and kpop skinship to this xD like... i am enLIGHTEND *O*

*cries* what is this... poolside actual love confession proposal with rings and pLANNING to commemorate their.. working.. relationship!?!? i'm??? they are so LOUD wtf-- i'm not... used to this... !?! *incoherent noises*

sidebar: i'm struggling to get a handle on their honorifics... are they phi/nong? but sometimes dauo sounds like he's using mueng/guu when he addresses offroad directly?

ljsdfjsLfj THE FACE. IN THE TUMMY. ITS BACK <3

OH FUCK OFFROAD WITH THE ASH HAIR. *O* YEAH YEAH OKOKOK i'M NORMAL ABOUT THIS!!!!

oh oh NO did daou just push offroad to the inside of the road so he's on the outside like that's--t hat's so boyfriend coded wtf

bahahaHAHAH is offroad going on about the bracelet because now daou *has* to buy one for him? xD what a smart cookie. xDDD

wAIT DID IT WORK!? PAHAHA--

other thoughts:

pentor looks SO FAMILIAR and i can't figure out why??? ;A; is he in something else?? i'm so confused but i think i love him already WHAT AN ADORABLE DIMPLED BOI *O*

i know you included the Whats The Matter? MV but I'm sorry I'm going to live in Last Kiss for like the next 5 days especially thAT BRIDGE WTF <3

the acoustic/live version is so PRETTY omg ;A; that 3 part harmony in the first chorus *chefs kiss*

sOMEONE is doing like a really high harmony in the pre-chorus and its so thin and wispy and pRETTY ahhh <3

although also ngl i think daou needs maybe some more vocal training he sounds quite strained sometimes... and he's got a lot of tension in his throat but good GOD his range!! he's SO talented wtf; ALSO their youngest member has SUCH a nice tone UGH <33333

their 2 shows:

ok love in translation actually sounds like exactly my cup of tea hahahah it looks so cute <3 and potentially heartbreaking but like not TOO heartbreaking

century of love... yeah ok i'm gonna put that on my list of things to get to when i'm in the right headspace for that kind of angst but what an interesting concept!! its like comphet, the series. xD

wait both their shows are comphet the series? xDDDD they just swapped who was suffering from it.

hoboy they are SO LOUD already from the beginning wtf

(sidenote but I would KILL for fortpeat to go on something like this cAN YOU IMAGINE the sHINANIGANS!! peat being so happy at all the food. fort's teasing. ugh. where can i start a petition ya'll)

the heIGHT DIFFERENCE am i'm feeling some type of way about it, yes yes i am

bAHAHAH the mandatory piggyback ride that they actually just SAY is boyfriend material i'm-- i'm not use do this lack of wink wink nudge nudge skinship approach in my boyband duos like?? *confused noises pt 2*

oh oh my gosh they have auntie fans too??? how adorableeeee!!!?! damn offroad sounds so soft in southern dialect idk whats going on my ears are blessed *u* <3

I don't know why but daou's "Try traditional snack!" made me crack up xDDDD

i have just realised what a mistake it was to start this on an empty stomach T___T that all looks SO GOOD wtf

lol that poor lady with the corgi's just wanted to go on her way and she got way-landed by these insane boys xDD

wft the nUZZING INTO THE NECK THING. IT S STILL. SO MUCH. IHAVE FEELIGNS ABOUT THIS MOMENT Tu T <3

guYS-- GUYS you said you both paid half... so you don't... you don't still need to do the cheek kisse-- oh nevermind you did them already ok then

i mean ok but for real tho the amount of times offroad just cracks up at somethign random daou does is genuinely really sweet?? like they seem to really have this wavelength that is just their own *u*

[phykios]

this one is dedicated to mi amor mari @perseannabeth, who is a beautiful bird and a wonderful friend and i am v v vvvvv grateful to have crossed the airwaves with her :”)

Today Was A Fairytale [read on ao3] T, modern royalty, fun at disneyland!

She stares at him. 

He stares back. “What?”

“Really?”

“What?”

“You really think this is going to be enough?” Annabeth points at her head, the blue Yankees cap squishing her curls. 

“Of course! It’s the Clark Kent effect.” As if to underline his point, Percy slips on his fake hipster glasses, except that stupid grin of his is too bright not to draw attention. 

“That’s not a real thing.”

“Sure it is. Studies show that glasses are actually good enough to alter your appearance if someone doesn’t know you well.”

“Then why didn’t you bring a pair of glasses for me?”

“Because your hair is definitely the prettiest thing about you,” he says, automatically tugging an unruly curl which peeks out from under the brim, a gesture so practiced she almost doesn’t register it--until he blinks, dropping his hand, blushing lightly. “I mean--the most noticeable thing. You know. A hat should be fine.”

He looks away. Heat rises to her face, too. Because it’s so hot out, obviously. 

“Anyway,” he mumbles, “um. No--no one’s going to give you a second look if your hair is hidden.”

Chewing her lip, Annabeth can’t help but worry. Percy’s face is extremely well-known, possibly more than hers, and they’ve both spent the better part of three weeks with their faces plastered all over the media on their diplomatic trip. This is probably a really, really bad idea. Then, a thought occurs to her. “How about,” she says, perking up, “you give me your glasses, and I’ll give you mine.” From her backpack, she fishes out a pair of sunglasses, big and nondescript. He’ll practically be wearing a superhero mask with these.

Percy smiles again, and Annabeth thinks she might fly. “Perfect.”

Which is how Her Royal Highness Anna Elisabeth Ingrid Irene of Sweden and His Serene Highness Perseus Alexandros Ioannis of Thera play hooky from their day of boring meetings, insufferable dignitaries, and stuffy security guards, to go see the eighth wonder of the world: Disneyland Resort in California.

And how Annabeth eats her words as they make it past the security gate unchecked. “Eh?” He beams, nudging her with his elbow. “Eh?”

Rolling her eyes, she shoves him back. “Shut up.”

***

[description: a tiktok video which depicts a line at Disneyland. the op, a black girl with braids, covers her mouth and looking into the camera, turning the camera to focus on the two people behind her. one is a tall boy with black hair and sunglasses, and the other is a blonde girl with a yankees hat and glasses. both are white. video text reads: “p sure the people behind me are prince percy and princess annabeth??? um?????”. background audio is a dubstep remix of the fight theme from undertale. end ID]

***

Maybe it’s a little weird, on account of her being actual royalty and all, but Annabeth has always been interested in princesses, both as a matter of historical record (history is awesome) and in the general sense. Like millions of other people, she, too, was raised on Disney movies and tales of princesses and true love, and she was just as captivated as the rest of them. She and Percy used to watch the Disney catalogue whenever their families held state visits for each other, staying up into the small hours of the morning, sharing some popcorn and singing along. 

Luckily for Annabeth, her favorite princess is holding a meet and greet at the Royal Hall.

“Excuse me,” Percy says, approaching Princess Ariel. Well, her cast member, anyway. “Could I get a photo for my friend?”

“Of course!” she trills, her blue eyes sparkling. “It would be my pleasure.” Holding her hand out, perfectly poised and graceful in a way that would impress even Annabeth’s stodgy etiquette instructor, she smiles, warm and welcoming, pivoting to bring Annabeth in for one of those weird, semi-awkward half-hugs. “What’s your name?”

“Anna,” says Annabeth. Hey, it’s not untrue. She’s a little leery of using any of her names, but Anna is common enough. Annabeth? Not so much. Even with her glasses and hat disguise, a little paranoia is justified, she thinks.

“It’s so wonderful to meet you, Anna,” she says, cheerful, with all the grace and charm of someone who doesn’t spend hours saying the same thing over and over again to excitable, temperamental children. What a trooper, she thinks.

“Don’t you recognize a fellow princess when you see one, your highness?” Percy says, grinning that stupid, smarmy grin of his. 

Annabeth glares. Oh, he thinks he’s so damn clever. 

“Oh, of course,” says Ariel, smoothly. “How could I have thought otherwise? Your highness.” And she curtsies to Annabeth, a short dip, her hand placed delicately against her chest. “Perhaps I can introduce you to my friend Anna, princess of Arendelle?”

Still smirking, Percy takes some more pictures, trapping Annabeth into smiling for the camera. She can’t be glaring daggers in her pictures, nor can there be video evidence of her kicking him--no matter how much she wants to.

And she definitely doesn’t miss the way Ariel not-so-subtly checks Percy out, eyeing him up and down.

“You fucking asshole,” she hisses as they leave the photo area, swatting him lightly, and he giggles. 

“Sorry, sorry, I couldn’t resist.”

“Ugh, I hate you so much.”

It’s hard to stay mad at him, though she definitely tries as they enter back out into the park proper, giving him just the barest hint of a cold shoulder. 

“Aw, come on,” Percy says. “I was just teasing.”

“You shouldn’t go around tempting fate like that,” Annabeth says. “Do you want to cause another international incident?”

Percy winces, no doubt remembering the Gateway Arch incident of 2008. 

“If someone recognizes us, we don’t have Zoe or any of her team to protect us,” Annabeth goes on. “Not that I think anyone here would try to hurt us, but…” But it’s a little nerve-wracking, being on her own like this. She hasn’t been alone like this for a really long time.

Wincing, Percy rubs the back of his head. “I guess I forgot you’re a little higher profile than me. Sorry.”

She doesn’t like to think about it, but it’s true. Percy, by his nature as the younger son of a largely defunct royal house, doesn’t have quite the same number of… issues… that someone like Annabeth might have.

Deflating, she uncrosses her arms. “It’s okay.”

“I should have asked you first.”

“It’s really okay,” she says. “No harm no foul.”

“Do you want to get out of here?” he asks, entirely serious. “I can call someone up.”

She knows just how long they’ve planned this, how many favors he’s called in and policies he’s sidestepped. Backing out now would just be a waste of a day. She shakes her head. “It’s fine,” she says. “I’m just… feeling a little exposed, I guess. But, I don’t want to ruin all our plans. Let’s keep going.” She grabs his hand, squeezing a little.

“...Okay,” Percy says. “But say the word, and we’ll call it a day. Okay?”

“Okay.”

“Good.” Like he doesn’t have any other expression today, he smiles at her again.

It hits her, suddenly. He’s so much taller than she remembers. Once upon a time she used to be taller than him; now, he’s basically a whole head above her. 

It’s annoying. But also… not.

Spying something over her shoulder, his eyes light up, and he practically gasps. “Cinderella!” he points with his free hand, like a five-year old. “Come on!” And he takes off to one of the park corners, dragging Annabeth along with him. 

He has to wait in line behind a pair of twin girls, six or seven years old by the looks of it, in identical Cinderella dresses for a photo, bouncing up and down on the balls of his feet, and when it’s finally his turn, he nearly trips over himself to go up and ask for a photo. 

Cinderella agrees, and now Annabeth is relegated to the job of cameraperson. Percy slides in next to the princess, his hand on her waist, but, ever the respectful gentleman, loosely held, so the cast member can slide out of his grasp without any difficulty at all.

Taking a few shots, it does look kind of strange to have Cinderella’s beautiful, shining face, and Percy’s enormous sunglasses blocking his. “Take off your glasses?” she says, lowering her phone for a second. 

Dutifully, Percy slips them off, smiling again for the camera. 

Cinderella’s smile doesn’t falter, a credit to her professionalism, but Annabeth can see her eyes widen, just a touch.

Annabeth snaps off a few more photos, “Got ‘em!” and Percy once again gushes over the princess, thanking her for her time. Grabbing Annabeth’s hand again, he practically skips off, leading them in the direction of a nearby candy shop. 

***

me: IM SHAKING GUESS WHO I JUST TOOK A PICTURE WITH????

sis: prince percy?

me: HOW TF DID YOU KNOW

sis: its on twitter already

***

They’re walking along, Annabeth slurping up a Dole whip, when she suddenly stops in her tracks, outside of one of the many, many gift shops. “Wait up a second.”

“Hm?” Percy says, around the giant lollipop in his mouth. 

“I want to get some Mickey ears.” 

Very quickly they get lost in the sea of Disney merchandise, walking the labyrinth of Star Wars and Marvel and Pixar goods. There’s a surprising amount of black for the so-called happiest place on Earth, but things do brighten up when Annabeth finally turns a corner and finds the enormous selection of Mickey ears. It’s a wash of sparkles, flowers, bows, and occasionally characters, for children and adults alike. Annabeth eyes a pair designed like Baby Yoda, eyes wide and ears adorably huge, before she fingers a pair of white Mickey ears that have a bridal veil attached to them, contemplating its counterpart, the black ears for the groom, each ear emblazoned with a sparkling silver “Happily Ever After.”

She looks around. Where did Percy wander off to, anyway? 

Well, wherever he is, hopefully he hasn’t gotten mobbed by a horde of excitable fangirls. Given that she can’t hear any screaming--well, any unusual, non-Disneyland-relevant screaming--that’s probably a good sign. 

Running her fingers over the ear selections, she finally picks out a pair of silver sequined earrings with a shiny gold bow, a tiny, rhinestone Cinderella’s castle placed delicately in the middle. 

Yeah. This one. 

Percy finds her as she is paying for her ears, a pair of his own already on his head, red balloons inside of plastic circles. The sunglasses, she notes with a tinge of nervousness, are tucked in his shirt, and not on his face, protecting his identity. “Oh, check mine out--they light up!” he says, giddy, pressing the button on the side, not that she can tell in the brightly lit shop.

“That’s not why I was looking.”

Walking out of the store, ears firmly in her possession, she looks around again. Percy’s face is out there for the world to see, and no one is giving them a hard time. 

And her hat is really sweaty. 

Ah, fuck it.

She removes the Yankees cap, shaking out her sweaty curls, sliding the ears on in its place.

And the glasses, for good measure.

“Cinderella?” Percy asks.

“I thought you’d approve.”

Outside the shop, next to a corn dog cart, Percy pulls her aside, out of the way of a whole classroom’s worth of children, holding up a plastic plag. “So, confession.”

“Percy…” He didn’t. “We said no gifts!” They had agreed to it that morning!

“Well, see,” he says, fumbling around in the bag, pulling out a black t-shirt. “I saw this, and I thought--I thought you might like it.”

He unfolds it, and Annabeth frowns at the shirt design. 

It’s… a drawing of a man in a purple mask against a solid black background, glaring at the viewer. Circling him, in distressed, white-grey military font, are the words “BARON ZEMO,” and the logo for the show he must star in, Marvel’s The Falcon and the Winter Soldier. She doesn’t really watch superhero shows, though, and she’s pretty sure Percy doesn’t, either. Maybe he’s started this one and he really likes it? “Thanks,” she says, confusion coloring her voice despite her best efforts. 

But he doesn’t look too disappointed. “I was looking through their pride merch, and they didn’t have any stuff with the ace flag, which totally sucks, but then I thought that maybe you might like something a little more subtle? So, yeah.” He shakes it. “Ace pride!”

Oh. Oh, this boy. 

She remembers, so vividly, visiting his father’s summer home on Kalymnos, a few years ago, the summer she turned nineteen, waking up to a banging in the kitchen, noisy pots and pans making a real racket. Granted, it had been one in the afternoon, and Annabeth probably should have been awake sooner, but she had stumbled out of the guest room into the kitchen, rubbing sleep out of her eyes, to the sight of Percy wrestling with the standmixer, making bright, neon purple frosting. The night before, sometime around three or four AM, that weird, liminal hour where the shadow of night just starts to recede, the sky a sweet, soft, dusky blue, she had come out as demisexual to her best friend, saying the words aloud for the first time ever. Loopy from lack of sleep, the moment had passed without much fanfare.

But Percy, dark-circled and still yawning, had woken up early to make her a chocolate cake. By the time she had woken up, he had baked the cake, chilled it, and made two out of the three frosting colors, a beautiful, moist, dark chocolate cake which ended up being frosted with a marbled mix of purple, black, and white, all folding into each other into a kind of colorless, grey sugar. 

Here, now, in Disneyland, she throws herself at him, wrapping his arms around his neck. His arms automatically come up to circle her, hugging her tight. 

She had been worried it had been some kind of defense mechanism. A young girl with an alarmingly high profile, Annabeth had been the subject of intense scrutiny with regards to any romantic entanglements, with critics, tabloid reporters, and fans alike attempting to invent gossip-worthy relationships with every boy she ever talked to--most usually Percy. They did grow up in the public eye together, attending all kinds of events and functions together over the last fifteen or so years. And they did tweet at each other. Like, a lot. They even had their own portmanteau hashtag. But no relationship ever materialized.

She thought maybe she was just being stubborn, unwilling to play the media game. But it hadn’t been stubbornness. It wasn’t about shyness or inexperience. It was real, and it was her.

And Percy hadn’t even blinked.

“I love it,” she murmurs. “Thank you.”

“Of course,” he says, swaying her from side to side, just a little. “It was my pleasure.”

***

What’s happening: #percabeth (Entertainment • trending)

@kndrck__ STREAM CHROMATICA: um @TheraUS @SwedenRoyals i think i found your sick royals? #percabeth #disneyland

@wasabiviking: omg werent they supposed to be at some hospital opening today #percabeth

@ChampionSno brando he/him: LMAOOO NOT #PERCABETH PLAYING HOOKY LIKE IT’S ROMAN HOLIDAY

***

“Holy shit,” Percy moans, his mouth full of food. “Oh my God. Dear God in Heaven.”

Annabeth kicks his ankle under the table. “Don’t be rude.”

He swallows, eyes fluttering. “Oh my God, Annabeth. Holy shit. This is the best damn sandwich I’ve ever had in my entire life.”

“A monte cristo?”

“A deep-fried monte cristo! In sweet batter!” Taking another bite, he moans again, just this side of indecent. “Oh my God I love Americans. They are absolute culinary geniuses.”

“Better than Bistrot Chez Rémy?” They had both been to Disneyland Paris, separately, sadly, and Percy had recommended the restaurant to her with great enthusiasm for her upcoming trip. As usual, he was spot on with his food recs. 

He nods, eyes closed in rapture. “By a mile.”

“You’ll have to learn to make your own when we get back home, then.”

He jolts, straightening up, cheeks full of food. Roughly, he swallows. “You’re right! I need to take notes.” And he takes out his phone, hurriedly typing down whatever scent and flavor notes he must be able to discern. “This is definitely challah…”

Plucking another piece of chicken with her fork out of her jambalaya, Annabeth lets her attention wander a little, content to watch the passengers on the Pirates of the Caribbean ride as they float on beside them, down in the artificially constructed bayou river. 

Truth be told, she’s kind of tired. They’ve been walking around all day, and even with the brief reprieve of rides, her shoes really aren’t the kind that deal well with huge amounts of walking. She can already tell that she’s going to crash, and crash hard, whenever they get back to their hotel. You know, if their security detail doesn’t eviscerate them first. 

When Percy had first presented his idea to her, she had agreed without hesitation. They had had a long, dense schedule of public appearances planned for their excursions to the states, and the days had begun to seriously wear them out. Together, they had worked out the kinks, coming up with contingencies, negotiating things to do, all over Discord so no one else would get wind of what they were doing. Prior to this trip, she hadn’t seen him in… probably almost a year. She knows his father had been keeping him close to home for whatever reason, and Annabeth had had a handful of official functions to deal with. Their paths just never managed to cross, up until now. 

She hadn’t realized how much she had missed him. 

It’s lonely, growing up in the public eye. It’s cliche, but it’s true. And while Annabeth is afforded a metric ton of various intersecting privileges, she thinks she’d probably give it up in a heartbeat. It kind of sucks being a living, breathing tourist attraction. 

Growing up, she had her cousin Magnus, and a handful of other assorted children to play with, but she would never say that she had a best friend, or even a good friend, until she’d met Percy. Her mother and his father, famous for their mutual dislike, had put aside their differences to host some kind of charitable dinner for the disgustingly wealthy, and had trotted out their respective children in all their finery. Annabeth, being all of twelve years old, hadn’t really grasped the gravity of the event, and had gotten into an itty bitty little food fight with the then-unknown Prince Perseus, the result of an extramarital affair whom his father had so graciously decided to acknowledge and adopt. 

After that night, they became fast friends, and she decided that, if she ever left the royal life, she’d make sure to take Percy with her. He’s one of the few things that makes her life bearable. 

She thinks about it, sometimes. Renouncing her title. It wouldn’t exactly be hard. There was Magnus, just in line behind her. And it’s not like her family held any executive power anyway. They’re just fancy, historically interesting celebrities. 

Would Percy give up his, she wonders?

“Hey.”

“Hm?”

He looks at her oddly over their dessert, two vanilla-bourbon creme brulees. “You okay?”

“Yeah,” she says. “Just tired. Long day.”

“You want to call it a night?”

She frowns. “What’s left?”

“Well, we did Space Mountain, Rise of the Resistance, Haunted Mansion, Pirates of the Caribbean, a few others,” he counts off his fingers, “saw the princesses, got Mickey ears, ate at Blue Bayou… I guess all that’s left is walking around the pier, if you want.”

“Sounds like you two had a full day.”

As one, they almost leap out of their seats, Annabeth choking on her spit. “Jesus, Zoe,” Percy pants, his hand over his chest. “You nearly gave me a heart attack.”

“Oh?” says Zoe Nightshade, the head of their security detail, who had just apparently materialized out of thin air. “Funny. I could say the same about you, sir.”

Coughing, Annabeth eventually manages to get her air back. “Hey, Zoe,” she wheezes. “How was your day?”

“Eventful. Let me tell you about it in the car.”

Annabeth glances at Percy, who’s looking a little bit like a deer in headlights. Honestly, she’s surprised they even made it this far without one of their own tracking them down. Still, it looks like their game is up. 

...Or is it?

Out of the corner of her eye, she sees a large tour group, approaching on the horizon.

“Sure,” Annabeth says, getting up. Luckily, they’ve already paid, so they can just head out; they don’t need to wait for another big group of people to cross their paths. “Will you let us go to the bathroom, first?”

Zoe squints. She’s always been able to see through Annabeth’s bullshit. But Annabeth has her best, Percy-patented baby seal eyes on, perfectly innocent. Surely, Zoe wouldn’t deny them a physical need such as relieving themselves?

After a moment, she nods. “Make it quick, if you please.”

“Of course,” Annabeth says, looking over at Percy, hoping he gets the message. He stands up, slow and stiff, eyes darting between the two of them. “We’ll be right back.”

They wander through tables and chairs towards the bathroom, her eyes always on the tour group as it just starts to pass by. Reaching out, Annabeth grabs Percy’s hand, and with a turn that would make her track coach proud, sprints out of the restaurant, using the throng of people as cover. 

She thinks she hears Zoe yelling behind them, but maybe it’s just her own laughter. “Come on!” she shrieks, breathless, as Percy’s long legs keep pace with her. “To California Adventure!”

***

darthbingus said: the monarchy are fucking parasites but percabeth is pretty cute i guess :/

ladyofsandwiches reblogged and said: it’s obviously a publicity thing lmao, also prince Percy is gay???

eowynning reblogged and said: he’s dating rachel dare, right? he can’t be gay 

ladyofsandwiches reblogged and said: That was a publicity thing too obvs, and Annabeth hasn’t ever been linked to a guy. The king of thera is hardline greek orthodox, there’s no way he’d let his son come out publicly. They’re both gay and pretending to date because homophobia

lardoftheprks reblogged and said: people can be bi and ace and pan and all sorts of things you know

batgirlcock reblogged and said: can you animals leave them alone fr

***

Zoe only spots them after the ferris wheel starts moving. Sprinting over to them, they’re still a full forty feet off the ground by the time she reaches the operator. “Sorry!” she yells down to her, hands cupping her mouth. “We’ll be down in ten minutes!”

“Ananbeth!” he chokes, giggles still escaping him. 

“What?” she laughs. 

“We’re in enough trouble as it is!”

“Exactly,” she says, settling back on the ride. “You’ll probably be grounded for life.”

“Me?” he squawks, playfully offended. “What about you?”

She scoffs. “Please. I’ll just pin it all on you.”

Leaning back, he pouts, arms crossed. “Wow. I plan this amazing day, violate a few embassorial rules, and probably put both of our countries on a massive red alert, and this is the thanks I get?”

“I helped plan it, too.” But he does have a point. “Thank you,” she says. “I had a lot of fun today.”

He turns his head to her, a grin stretching across his face. “Me too.” 

His voice is so soft, so fond. They share a look, a moment, no words between them, only the silence of a true, deep companionship. They don’t need to say anything else, because they already know what the other would say. 

As one, they break away, looking back out into the California evening. 

They don’t talk much as the ferris wheel climbs higher and higher. Honestly, Annabeth is kind of impressed with how well he’s handling himself--she knows heights are a bit of a weakness of his. He grabs the edges of their gondola every once in a while as it drops a few feet, knuckles white and face a little green, but he manages to keep his dinner down, even as the ferris wheel grinds to a halt, Percy and Annabeth at the top of the world. The swing back and forth a little, hot faces against the cool evening breeze. 

And they stay there. 

And stay there. 

And… stay there. 

Annabeth checks her watch. How long have they been up here?

Percy taps his feet, a little too frantic just to be ADHD. 

Finally, there’s a burst of noise from below them, garbled and static. “Uh, yes, excuse me--” the voice says, amplified through a megaphone. “Yeah, um, it appears we are having some… uh, technical difficulties with the Pixar Pal-A-Round. Please remain calm, as we have our best technicians on it, and we are working on evacuating the ride in a calm and efficient manner.” Then the voice cuts out. 

Annabeth glances towards Percy. He has his hands in his lap, fists clenching and unclenching, over and over again. “Uh… you okay?”

“Hm? Oh, sure,” Percy says, “just fine. Peachy keen.” He squeezes his eyes shut, slowly blowing out his breath through his mouth. 

“Hey.” She reaches over, and takes one of his hands in hers, lacing their fingers together. After a long day of holding hands, somehow it still manages to surprise her, how well they fit together, how her skin tingles as she rubs her thumb against his finger. “It’s gonna be fine. We’re gonna be just fine. They’re going to get us off this ride, and then we’ll fly home and be grounded for life.”

“I thought,” he wheezes, “you’d blame it all on me?”

“As if you could come up with a plan as genius as hiding from our guard in It's A Small World.”

He nods, shakily. “Right. All you. Definitely not my idea. Everyone knows I’d have looped back to Pirates of the Caribbean.”

“Definitely.” She squeezes his hand, scooting a little closer. “Just breathe with me a little, okay?”

They breathe together, slowly and evenly. At some point, Percy takes her hand in both of his, running his thumbs over her palm, tracing her lifelines like a map. His hands are big, and warm, and it seems to calm him down a little, so she doesn’t mind all that much. 

Twilight darkens, stars twinkling against the grey, dusky sky, and still they are holding hands. Eventually, Percy relaxes, slumping against his seat.

“You good?” 

He nods. He still doesn’t let go. “Yeah. Just…” he sighs, stretching his arms up, taking Annabeth’s hand with him. “Not super looking forward to the dressing down I’m going to get.”

She winces. Annabeth’s dad is a little more flexible than Percy’s when it comes to breaches of protocol. The king of Thera is somewhat famous for his paranoia. “I hope it was worth it.”

He whips his head to her, eyes wide. “Of course it was worth it!” he says, as though the opposite were even fathomable. “You kidding? This was the best day of my life.”

“Better than your sixteenth?” His father had officially acknowledged him that day. Annabeth had spotted him in a deserted hallway with his mother, the two of them fighting off a few happy tears. She knows just how special that day was for him. 

“Not even close.” Squeezing her hand, he smiles again, that smile she knows almost better than her own by now. That smile she grew up with, a quiet oasis in a whirlwind of ancient tradition and modern media coverage. That smile is safety, familiarity. That smile was there to greet her when her mother chose to leave her family, when her uncle died without heirs, thrusting the position of heiress on her, whenever she had a rotten day or a bad grade or a lonely night, just on the other end of a phone, or down the hall, or in the kitchen. 

Whatever happens, she knows, Percy will be her best friend. Her anchor. 

Her…

She swallows. “Thank you,” she says again. “I needed this.” A day without an agenda. A day just for them. 

His eyes are dark, and soft, like the water beneath them. One hundred and fifty feet in the air in a broken ferris wheel, there’s nowhere safer she can be. “Me too.”

So she’s not really surprised at herself when she says, “I’d really like to kiss you now.”

Eyes widening, just a hair, he opens his mouth, momentarily speechless. “You--are you sure?”

She nods, maybe a little too enthusiastically.

“Cool. Uh, me too.”

“Cool.”

Neither of them move. 

“So, do--do you want to--”

Annabeth leans in, her other hand cupping his cheek, and kisses him. 

His lips are soft. His mouth tastes like vanilla and bourbon. They are trapped in a metal box, one hundred and fifty feet off the ground, about to get the punishment of their lives when they get down, and it is absolutely, utterly perfect. 

And when Annabeth pulls back, there are fireworks. 

Quite literally.

Percy’s face glows with pink and green and purple, and a little fire in his eyes that’s all him. The pops of the fireworks, loud and brassy, and muted, completely overshadowed by the pounding of her heart in her chest. 

They rest their heads against each other, breathing each other’s air, quiet and intimate, the calm before the storm that is surely coming. But that’s fine. Let it come, she thinks. She’ll be safe with Percy.

When the park technicians eventually get the ferris wheel moving again, Percy and Annabeth disembark from the gondola like nothing’s even gone wrong, waving to the crowd of people, fans, and reporters alike, who have swarmed the pier, phones and cameras held aloft in a constellation of light, before being quickly hurried away by Zoe and her crew, ushered to the end of the pier where Annabeth’s embassy’s car is waiting. 

Percy doesn’t let go of her hand once. 

***

KALYMNOS, GREECE--Prince Percy has arrived on the island for his family’s annual summer retreat, bringing his girlfriend, Princess Annabeth of Sweden, with him for the fifth year in a row, and the third as his official partner. Lifelong friends, the couple were most recently seen at Disneyland Tokyo, continuing something of a tradition for the two royals where they visit Disneyland parks across the globe. Our sources inside the castle are hinting that the family is planning something big this year. Could we see a proposal by the end of summer? Be sure to subscribe for more updates!

[sxfik]

a king and his rusty throne (i'm just skin and bones)

read on ao3 • main masterlist • law school masterlist

summary: Lawyer Han Joon Hwi never yields, fighting endlessly. The court was his domain, where he held the power over his opponent. The only exception, of course, is his 5'6" passionate, animated girlfriend, Attorney Kang Sol.

request by anon: Hiii here’s a prompt I saw on twitter. Not mine. I hope op doesn’t mind me submitting this here.

kang sol a untying joonhwi’s necktie would be so...

a/n: aaaa thank you so much for sending this prompt in! this is a lot shorter than my usual stuff but i couldn't get this scene out of my head. i hit writers block on my other fic so i wrote this instead and surprisingly it was much easier to write! anyways, hopefully i can post the other one soon. as always, enjoy <3

word count: 1354 words

After solving a murder, clearing an innocent man's name and capturing an assemblyman for corruption just in his first year of law school, and going on to becoming the top prosecutor in his department, one would think prosecutor Han Joon Hwi wouldn't be shaken by anything. And to be fair, he isn't. Despite having to combat so many injustices, he wasn't one to cower in fear nor let himself get emotionally involved. No, nothing would shake him.

Oh, except for his 5'6" girlfriend who had enough passion and fire to make him doubt how well his argumentative skills really are. Just as he had walked into their shared apartment, his talkative, ardent girlfriend had already launched into discussing the latest Supreme Court case ruling.

"It doesn't make sense! Even though some of the concurrent opinions made good points, the dissenting opinions had a better line of reasoning. The court should have been a lot more divided on the decision," Kang Sol rushed out her arguments, one after the other as her hands were fevorantly emoting, as if she was preaching.

After graduating Hanguk Law School, both of them had kept in touch and despite his every effort, his love for her only grew the more time he spent with her. As he was helping her practice her main argument for her upcoming case, he couldn't take it anymore. Watching her deliver her arguments so succinctly, her voice strong and decisive, drew him to her and he kissed her, with all the love and emotion he had felt for her ever since they met. He confessed to her, right there in front of the sacred court, his hands still in her hair, his lips still red and swollen from her bites, his breathing still hurried.

Despite dating for five years, Han Joon Hwi still felt like a teenage boy watching her, head over heels and moony eyed for the fiery, clumsy girl that had stumbled into his life. Though he held the power in court, Kang Sol held the power over his heart. He was never a match for her, no matter how good his grades were, no matter what position he held. Her eyes could take him apart bit by bit, pealing back every layer until he was bare skin and bones. And he'd offer every piece of him to her before she could ask him for it. He'd kneel in front of her, time and time again, if it meant he got to keep her in his life.

It was terrifying, like looking into the vast blue ocean and contemplating just what monstrosities it held under. But as the waves crashed into him, his heart and mind was soothed, the water drawing him in until he was captured into the riptide and yanked under. And the scariest part? He didn't resist. He just let her sweep him in until the fear he held was washed away. Until an unending, unyielding peace swept over his skin, his bones. Until he was cradled and lulled by her power, her passion, her love.

He watched her grow into the woman she is today, arguing at the pots and pans in the kitchen as soon as he walked into their shared apartment. And even though the exhaustion was heavy on his shoulders and chest, the sight of her walking around their kitchen, wearing his sweater, her hair down to her shoulders, was enough to erase every bit of fatigue from his soul.

"Sol-ah, you know that argument would never hold up in court," he chuckled as she whirled to face him, her gaze narrowed. He was still in his work clothes, only pausing to discard his briefcase when he entered, before he leaned against the kitchen table to listen to his girlfriend. Watching her argue so passionately was distracting, to say the least, and it was evident in his voice. The thoughts of kissing her against the counter was overwhelming, with Sol left heavily breathing after her rant and his mind clouded with thoughts of other activities.

His gaze was still on her as she stepped closer, as his breath quickened and chest tightened. She narrowed her eyes slightly, her lips almost curving into a smirk as her hands traced up his chest, landing on his tie at the collar.

"And what arguments are acceptable, Prosecutor Han Joon Hwi?" she glanced at him, mischief dancing in her eyes as she pulled on his tie, bringing his head down to her level. Her lips paused only centimeters away from his, taunting him, and his gaze was solely focused on her soft red lips, yearning to press his against hers.

"You," he breathed out, "don't play fair, Attorney Kang Sol." Her proximity threw every rational thought out the window, the hold she had on him only growing with her closeness. If she asked for him to beg, he would as long as he was able to press against her lips, push against her body.

"Hm," she pretended to think, her gaze still on his lips, "I don't see you complaining."

Taking his chance, he surged forward to meet her lips, pressing against it insistently. Sol's hand tightened against his tie, pulling him closer to her, before her hands traced down to the buttons on his suit jacket. Unbuttoning them, she slipped her hands underneath his suit and against his white shirt, the warmth of her hands seeping through the fabric until she pushed the coat of his shoulders and discarded it on the floor.

Her hands traced over his shoulders, her grip tightening on his shoulders before her delicate hands traced up, up, up, until it reached his tie around his collar. Slowly, she untied the tie, almost like she was unwrapping a present and it took all the strength in him not to ask her, no beg her for her hands to go faster.

Her lips were addicting on his, the softness of her lips contrasting the passion of the kiss, as he buried one hand in her hair and the other cupped her jaw, pulling her in closer. Her tongue brushed against his lips and he groaned into the kiss, his voice almost guttural. It was frantic and unrefined, but he could only feel the need to have her closer, to feel her.

He turned them around, Sol now against the kitchen table as his tongue grazed her bottom lip, sucking slightly and she gasped against him. His hand left her jaw, tracing its way down to her collarbones and curving around her waist and pulling her close. Both of his hands traced down then, hooking around her thighs and lifting her until she was placed on the kitchen table.

Drawing away slightly, Sol turned her attentions towards his jaw, pressing insistent, hot kisses down until she reached his throat. Joon hwi felt his heart quicken as she sucked lightly against the skin of his throat and groan at the feel of her tongue lightly brushing the sensitive spot. It was bliss and it was enough to wind him up, enough for him to capture her lips once more and press deeper and all consuming kisses.

Her legs came to wrap around him, pulling him in closer as her hips slightly rocked up against him, the kiss swallowing his groan from her ministrations. His hands traced up from her thighs until it found the edge of her shirt and he placed his hands against her burning skin, her fire threatening to consume him. It drove him insane, the feel of her body pressed so deliciously against him, the softness of her skin enough to drive him into madness. It only made him pull her closer, ask for more, beg her to keep kissing, keep going.

"Is that a convincing argument?" she pulled away slightly, her voice was almost a whisper, her breathing heavy. Her skin was flushed red and her hair was messy, and yet she was still the most beautiful girl he'd ever seen.

"I think I need more evidence," his breathing was labored, as he let her pull him into her vast ocean once more.

[sneezefiction]

sleep over? please.

Akaashi x reader - scenario

prompt: Sleep over? Please.

a/n: Akaashi has my heart, y’all. i thought i’d write from a prompt this time around and i’m about to hit 100 followers, so, being me, i must celebrate with fluffy feels. i love this community. thanks for inviting me in so warmly <3 

warnings: slight cursing

wc: 1440

---

It wasn’t unlike you to be up late. Dim lights on in your room, phone in hand, mind fuzzy and tired.

It wasn’t unlike Akaashi to try and figure out the reason you’re still awake.

Somehow he always knew when you couldn’t sleep. Sometimes he knew by way of instinct and other times you just made your social media scrolls a little too apparent.

Tonight, it was Twitter that gave you away. Your late-night likes, retweets, and posts weren’t exactly incognito, so you expected to get a text from your boyfriend scolding you for still being up, rolling around in your bed sheets.

However, the text you received was far from nagging… 

12:53 am - Akaashi: Saw you on twitter. I can’t sleep either.

12:53 am - Akaashi: If you don’t want to, it’s fine, but I have a proposition...

12:53 am - Akaashi: do u want to sleep over?

12:54 am - Akaashi: Please.

---

12:55 am - Y/n: Give me 10 minutes

You’re not sure why, but his text surprises you. Akaashi has always been self-sustaining, not usually asking for much from you, his friends, or family. So the needier tone in his text gets you wondering if he’s actually okay.

You know better than to ask him ‘what’s wrong’ over text. In-person conversations are more comfortably suited for him. So you slip on some sneakers and swing a jacket over your shoulders, tugging the sleeves up and onto your arms making sure to be as quick as possible.

You pat yourself down for one final check - keys, bag, and wallet... all here. Nodding to yourself, you set off.

As you pull up to his house, you notice that Akaashi is already standing on his front porch waiting for you.

He’s wearing a textured, gray hoodie you gifted him a few months back and some name brand joggers. Akaashi always manages to be unintentionally fashionable, especially when it comes to lounge-wear.

As you make your way up the walkway, you notice his slightly unfocused expression. A clear sign that he’s feeling a bit off. Akaashi only ever got that way under major stress, usually relating to school or volleyball.

He lets out a breath, reaching his arms out toward you and wrapping them around your neck. A hand shifts behind your head, entangling your hair in lithe fingers and pulling your face gently into his chest.

“Sorry for asking you over so late.” He sighs, almost as though he’s disappointed in himself for being needy.

“I always tell you to let me know if you need something, Akaashi. I’m glad you texted.” You muffle out into his hoodie, drawing your arms around his back.

“Let’s go inside, I’m sleepy and I know you are too.” He states.

As if on cue, you let out a big yawn. This guy is something else. A prophet? A mind reader? Just super intuitive?

Ah, whatever, you give up thinking about it. He just is what he is… and now it’s my turn to figure him out.

You head to his bedroom, familiar with its colors of deep blue and crisp white and, as per usual, completely spotless. You’ve spent many a day and night theorizing, studying, and laying next to your boyfriend in this room. It’s a bit of a sanctuary in its own, quiet way.

Akaashi lets you crawl into his bed first so that you can claim your space under his covers. You feels the bed shift slightly as he joins you. He’s relatively silent, but not in his usual manner. It’s as though he’s trying to say something, his mouth barely opening and then closing right after.

So you let him process his words before they inevitably tumble out. In the meantime, you both study the ceiling above you, not making physical contact yet in order to minimize distraction from his thoughts.

“Y/n, do you like me?” He breaks the bubble of silence around you.

“Hm?” A silly question, you think.

“You know I do, Akaashi. I’m dating you, aren’t I?” You chuckle, turning your head to the black-haired boy. His face is entirely serious, eyes still fixed above.

“What do you mean exactly?” You question, matching his seriousness this time.

He runs a hand through his hair, then shifts his head toward you, reaching an arm under the blankets to grab your hand.

Rubbing your hand with his thumb thoughtfully, Akaashi clarifies, “I mean, why are you with me? What benefit do you see in being around me?” He pauses, taking a breath before his next question.

“Do you really see a future with me?” His cheeks are tinted pink, but the question isn’t cute or lighthearted.

It’s anxious.

You can practically feel the self-doubt in his whispers. A masked vocalization of his fears, probably stemming from the beginning of your relationship, spilling out.

You move closer to his body, pulling him into your chest, deciding that physical contact would be the best way to convey your answer.

“Akaashi… remember when we talked about college and plans awhile back?”

He nods. 

“And how we discussed long distance?”

He nods, but clearly the topic was more painful for him, his eyebrows furrowing slightly.

“You know it’s only a couple of hours, baby.” You remind him gently, “We have every weekend… every slower day… any school break to see each other again.”

“I know, I know.” He sighs, “But, do you really want me? Do you want to drive and wait for me?”

You unlink your hand from his to run your fingers along the outline of his slim jawline. It’s the first time he’s ever expressed his hesitance of your feelings for him.

He needed confirmation and confidence that you care for him. That you want to be by his side.

Throughout high school, he’d had the luxury of being a vital part of his team. They needed his skills. His team relied on him and trusted that he could follow through as a setter. Without Akaashi they would’ve been lost and, at the least, much weaker.

But you were a different issue entirely. You didn’t “need” him per se. His critical thinking and intellect could only get him so far in a relationship. Something he didn’t see himself being in for years… yet here he is, you in his bed, listening to him sort through his problems once again.

You see him flipping through the thoughts in his mind, so you bring him back to the real world, pushing his hair back to place a delicate kiss to his forehead.

He meets your eyes.

“I know you don’t see it my way, but Akaashi… this relationship is more than just some cost-benefit diagram.” You smile, eyes lighting up with humor.

“I am choosing to be with you because…” It’s your turn to blush, debating whether or not this is the time to say it.

And it really is time. He needs to know how you truly feel.

“... dammit, Akaashi, I love you.”

His heart jumps. Those were 3 words he wasn’t expecting.

You continue, “Yes, you add something to my life. You make me laugh and think deeper than I’m used to. You teach me perspective. You treat me so kindly but…” He’s listening so intently now,

“You are so much more than what you give. You make me want you. To hold you, text you, and call you if you need anything. To just lay here with you… you make little things so much more beautiful.”

Akaashi may not speak much, but this is a new level of speechless.

It’s like you’re confessing to him all over again.

But this time, it’s from the basis of love.

Nothing cute or made-up. Just... sincerity.

“So, please, if you ever think I don’t care about you or want you around, even if we’re fighting with each other or managing too much at one time, just call me. I’ll drop everything to get to you. I promise.”

It takes him a moment to handle everything. To grasp these abstract feelings and apply them to your relationship.

But after a minute of stillness he finally understands.

He feels the same. And he has for a long time.

It’s why he cares so much to hear it from you. To know that you don’t just like him, but that you are actively willing to seek him out. That you want his presence, his rough edges, and his faults in your life.

“I… love you too, y/n.” He manages to respond, unsure as to how he can answer to everything else you’ve just said.

So you bury your face in his hair, letting the flush slowly fade from your own face and breathe in the perfume of his cedar scented shampoo.

“Thank you for trusting me.” You whisper.

“Thank you for coming over.” He murmurs in reply.

“I love a good, emotional sleepover, baby. You should know that much by now.” You quietly jest, eyes closing.

“Yeah,” He hums, “I appreciate them too.” Mumbles Akaashi.

You both drift off into a serene sleep, releasing your hesitations and inhibitions into the tranquil midnight air.

---

From this day forward, you both refer to this moment as “Akaashi’s Therapy.” 

Since then, it’s become an inside joke, but only you two remember how monumental of a turning point this conversation was for your relationship. 

It’s why you both made it through your last year of high school together. It’s why, even with weeks (sometimes months) of distance, you both consistently went back to each other. Study nights, weekend trips, and Christmas parties.

And also why you’re here now, admiring the glimmering diamond engagement ring on your finger. Hand-in-hand with your best friend, now fiancé, at a summertime festival. It feels like a dream, but the many long years apart remind you that it’s very real. That you both made it.

No cost-benefit analysis or prophetic parable could’ve gotten you both to this point. No war strategy and not an ounce of magic could’ve held up...

But a sleepover? Hell yes.

[baby-grayson]

Kind Stranger| Part 2|GBD

Read Part 1 Here

 Word Count: 2.8k (teeny tiny)

Trigger Warning: quarantine talk Tags (Thank you to the amazing dumpling that taught me how to do this!!): @evergreendolan​ @someonetogray​ @vintagedolan​ A/N: Thank you to everyone who gave me their thoughts on the first part. Please let me know what you think on this one, I love getting any kind of feedback. 

Grayson opened his eyes as the earliest rays of sunlight trickled in through his window. He pushed himself out of his bed and began his morning routine in a daze: half asleep as he brushed his teeth and found a clean pair of underwear. His consciousness awoke during his daily piece of avocado toast, which he ate while enjoying the view from their kitchen window. In his groggy state, he left the plate at the table when he went to put a load of laundry in the washer. He took the liberty of moving Ethan’s clothes from the washer to the dryer and starting it for him.

Grayson retrieved his phone from his nightstand, opening twitter for a brief scroll. He and Ethan published their video about Ethan’s acne yesterday; twitter was not very pleased with them. Grayson’s jaw tightened as he read the accusations about him and his brother. Grayson forcefully planted his phone back on his nightstand. He ran his hands through his hair, thinking back to the long nights on the couch where he wrapped an arm around Ethan’s shoulder and consoled him through his journey towards self-love. Without opening it again, Grayson shoved his phone in his pocket before grabbing the keys to the van from on top of his dresser. Walking out of the house, he quickly scanned the entryway and living room. He stopped and went back to place his avocado toast plate into the sink, reminding himself to wash it when he got home. He scanned again, not seeing anything out of place. Silently, he wished Ethan sweet dreams from across the house and slipped out the front door.

His breath left him when he reached the shore at his favorite morning beach. His lips turned down, jaw tightening as he noticed that her footsteps laid in the sand before he arrived. “Of fucking course,” Grayson groaned softly before collapsing down to the ground. It wasn’t enough that his brother was being accused of ugly things by strangers, but he missed crossing paths with Kate for the first time in the two weeks since their nearly silent friendship started. He laid back on the sand, feeling thousands of tiny, jagged pieces creep under his shirt and into the waistband of his shorts.

For a fraction of a second, Grayson thought about grabbing his phone from his pocket and looking again at the comments. He stopped himself quickly. Taking a deep breath, he knew the best way to deal with this feeling was with Ethan by his side. Ethan grounded him. Ethan tethered him back to Earth. Ethan was the cautious, practical mind to Grayson’s own idealistic, fanciful one. Grayson thought about Ethan, at home and laying in his bed. He hoped his brother slept well and long. Poor Ethan was going to wake up to the same storm that greeted Grayson.

No, he’s not going to think about this, Grayson decided dwelling on this topic was no use without his brother. Grayson sat up, his eyes followed Kate’s footsteps all the way to the right and then all the way to the left. Why was he so excited to see her? She was just a girl. A pretty girl, sure. But Grayson had met lots of pretty girls over the years. Damn, Ethan was right…maybe Gray was getting desperate. Next thing you know, he would be writing love letters to the old lady at the grocery store check out counter.

Damning Ethan aside, Grayson was genuinely excited to see Kate. She had crossed his mind more than once during his morning drive. He didn’t know anything about her. Grayson looked down at her footprints again, the only sign that she had already crossed the shore. He squinted.

One footprint was deeper than the other. Odd. He reached over with his own thumb to make sure his eyes were not tricking him. Yup, one foot was a whole half-thumb deeper than the other. Maybe she wears weird shoes. He didn’t think long on this before kicking some sand into the footprint. He swung his shirt from his head and rested it beside him. He laid back. If he couldn’t surf, and he couldn’t talk to a pretty girl, the least he could do was work on his tan.

The sun felt good on his skin. His breathing slowed, and he found a serene inner quiet. On that early Thursday morning, on a secluded beach in Malibu, Grayson found a moment of peace. 

“You’re late” He grinned, feeling his face get warm.

“I thought you already left,” he opened his eyes to be greeted by her smile. “You do realize I have to walk back to get to my car right?” she chuckled and kicked off her sandals. She laid her purse in the sand and dropped to sit beside Grayson. He noted a sweet, citrus scent as she settled down on the sand.

“I guess I didn’t think about you having a car, you kind of just appeared here every day” “That’s fair, I’m probably just a figment of your imagination.” If it wasn’t for her laugh, Grayson would have considered that a possibility. “That is a possibility,” he chuckled, “why do you come out here anyways?”

She paused for a moment. Grayson noticed the sea breeze lift her dark locks from her shoulders. “I’m new to town,” she decided on. “Being stuck in my apartment during a pandemic, when I don’t know anyone around here gets real boring, real quick.” Grayson nodded in agreement. “What about you? I’m surprised you’re here without your board.”

Grayson sucked in a soft breath against his teeth, “I like being here. I mean, I like the beach. It’s a good place to get away, have a moment.” “Wow, that’s deep dude.” She looked at him with a glossy look in her eye and her lips pursed. Grayson looked back, feeling his cheeks get warm again. She threw her head back and let out a loud laugh. “I’m sorry. Sarcasm isn’t nice,” she said with a warm smile. Grayson shook his head softly and smiled at her, “I’m down with it.” Was that cringe? It sounded cringe. “But no, I really love the beach. I guess it’s my space to not have to think about the rest of the world.” “Hm..how California boy of you,” Grayson chuckled along with her this time. She was cute, the way she poked gentle fun at him. She was silly. “So you said you’re new here? where are you from?” She started “West Philadelphia born and raised, on the playground is where I spent most of my days” Grayson joined in “Chilin out maxin relaxin all cool, shooting some b-ball outside in the hood” They shared a warm laugh. Grayson grinned as she flashed him one of her bright smiles. “But really, where are you from?” He probed. She laughed, “West Philly, born and raised. Weren’t you listening?!” They giggled together.

“That’s cool,” he responded as his smile grew wider by the second. “I’m from just over the river in New Jersey.”

“Oh, so you’re not a native California boy. So tell me— how long do I have before the water gets to me and I turn into a blonde, Instagram goddess?” There she goes again, soft pokes. Kind of like kindergarten.

“I’m not sure. I’ve been here five years and I have yet to turn into a goddess if that means anything”

She laughed, “Well it’s good to know time is on my side.” She played with the brown leather band of a simple wristwatch. She looked down at the watch face and mumbled, “shit.” She started to gather her purse and sandals from the sand and stand as she said, “I’ve got to go. I’m going to be late for…something.” She wrestled her sandals onto her feet.

Grayson felt a wave of awkwardness wash over his body. Should he offer to walk her to the car? No, that’s too much. Should he ask what she’s going to be late for? Maybe that’s a little creepy.

“I’ll see you tomorrow?” She pushed her hair behind her ears, looking down at Grayson on the ground. “Yeah I’ll be here tomorrow.” Grayson smiled shyly, more aware of his body language now than he had been for the past half hour.

She started to walk up the beach but looked back at him, “Don’t be late! Bye Grayson” His name sounded good coming out of her mouth.

”Bye Kate!” Shit, I should have asked for her number.

Once she was out of earshot, Grayson groaned out loud and threw a rock into the ocean. He watched the tiny, smooth thing pierce through the rough, complicated ocean surface. Grayson wiped the sand off his body as he stood up and started to walk back to his van.

When Grayson arrived home, he found Ethan at the counter, in his underwear, eating some cereal and dairy free milk. “You see twitter?” Ethan commented as Grayson put his keys down. For a small moment, Grayson had forgotten about the video fiasco. For a second, he had forgotten about every part of his place on the internet. His tough but clearly upset brother brought him back to reality. Grayson moved toward the counter and wrapped a familiar arm around Ethan’s shoulders.

 ***********

As Grayson settled into bed, later that same day, his mom called him. His mother asked if he and Ethan were willing to fly out to New Jersey to spend the weekend with her. His mother told him that his sister was coming for the weekend and she wanted all of her kids under the same roof for a few nights. Grayson told his mom that he and Ethan would make it out to Jersey for the weekend, wished her a good night, and said he loved her. Grayson used his phone to buy two plane tickets for Friday evening: tomorrow evening.

He thought about Kate. What if he doesn’t show up on Saturday and Kate thinks he’s not interested? Or mean? Or weird? Or a flake? And deep down, in a place he wasn’t ready to touch yet, he wanted more of her. He found solace in how different she was, so grounded and natural compared to his LA lifestyle. His own slice of New Jersey on a California beach.

He wanted to go back and talk to her every day, all day, until they both lost their voices and had to draw pictures in the sand to communicate. He had yet to separate these deep feelings from his general loneliness, it had been over a year since he was more than anyone’s ‘Netflix and Chill’. Ethan had taken to calling him desperate and urging Grayson to audition for the Bachelor. He pushed these thoughts aside, not having the emotional bandwidth to process this all right now. He was going to ask for her number. People still did that right? Maybe it had been too long for Grayson…

 **********

The next morning, Grayson felt the beach winds move through his loose muscle shirt. He ran a hand through his hair, still getting used to its new short form. He decided against sitting on the sand since he was not intending to be planted on the ground today.

The decision not to sit started his anxiety. He was changing their routine, what if she wasn’t okay with it? Why didn’t he think of this earlier? How long were they going to spend together? What if she was just being nice? What is it that she called herself? Yeah what if she was just being a kind stranger?

Once more, he ran a hand through his hair. He plunged both of his hands into his pockets to prevent any future hair touching. He took a deep breath in, listened to a wave break on the shore, and released the air from his lung. When he looked up, a dainty, happy figure was walking toward him. “Good Morning” she said sweetly. “Good Morning,” Grayson smiled and took his hands out of his pockets. Oh no, did he just mess up his outfit? “Would you believe this is the first time I’ve seen you standing up?” she placed a hand over her eyes to look up at his face against the light of the sun. “I promise I don’t usually spend a lot of time on my ass” Was that funny? That was supposed to be funny..

She took a moment to look him up and down. Her eyes locked on his. “I thought you’d be taller”

Grayson laughed heartily while she smiled with an accomplished look on her face. He quieted down and found a moment when they were just standing there, looking at each other. A happy Grayson let the moment hang in the air before saying, “Can I join you? I’m curious to see where this beach leads.” A half-truth. Kate smiled and nodded “Yeah, come along. But don’t be disappointed, it just leads to more beach.” Grayson already knew that, but he nodded along anyway, “Still, I feel like a walk” The pair started along the shoreline together. Grayson smelled her familiar sweet, citrus scent. He felt the sunshine down on his arms and the exposed parts of his back, energizing his entire body. Her bright eyes met his and they shared a smile. From a few yards away, they heard a peculiar, gulping noise. Grayson looked up while Kate pointed and laughed at a seagull attempting to eat an entire banana.

Once again, on that Malibu beach, early in the morning, Grayson found a rare moment of peace. He looked down, seeing his large footsteps align with her tiny ones. I should say something, I should say something. Grayson felt his face go hot again. Grayson gulped down again, shaking his palms subtly to dislodge the sweat coming to the surface of his skin. He looked down at her face, beaming brighter than the sun on that Friday morning.

Grayson looked down at their feet, watching her walk along the sand. He saw her right leg dig deep into the sand, gracefully holding her body up. Then, he saw her left leg meekly touch the surface of the sand before trading off duty to the other leg. The footprints…

“Did you hurt yourself?” Grayson gestured down to her left side.

She stiffened. Her shoulders fell back like a toy soldier; small and inviting but erect and ready. Grayson’s eyes wandered to her lips; her full pink mouth sat pursed above her chin. She let out a small breath before replying. “No…I have a bad leg.” Grayson heard the period at the end of the sentence. She was curt with her words, but not harsh.   “Oh, I’m sorry…” Was he sorry for asking? Or sorry that she had a bad leg? Well, he was sorry for both, so it didn’t really matter.

She nodded softly. Silence hung in the air around them. On one side of them, the ocean crashed into the shore. On the other side, an eerily quiet LA hid behind the cliffs. “Speaking of injuries,” she broke the silence, “how’s your foot?” “It’s doing better, “Grayson noted, “I’ll probably be back on my board by Monday.” Or maybe Tuesday, or Wednesday, or Thursday… “well if you came out looking like that, I would hate to see the other guy,” she smiled sweetly at him, “even though he’s a pebble” she held in a small giggle. “Funny you say that, I’m leaving tonight to spend the weekend with my mom. I’m worried that I might meet a mean pinecone and injure the other foot,” Grayson joked. “I’ll be here if you’re in need of anymore emergency medicine” she quipped back. “Thanks for the offer,” he chuckled. “But I’m actually going home to Jersey for a few days, so I’ll be too far away for any in person care.” Grayson swallowed hard in his throat. “Could I have your number?”

Holy shit, holy shit, holy shit. Was that funny? Did she like it? Did she like him? Was she just being polite? Was that okay? It probably wasn’t okay. He hadn’t done this for like a year and a half. Do people still use phone numbers? What if she says no, how does he play it off? He felt a single bead of sweat dance down his neck and meander its way down his back.

She looked at him. She really looked at him. She saw the diamond embeds on his canine teeth. She saw the silver chain on his neck, sparkling in the reflection of the sun. She saw the tattoos covering his legs. She saw his muscles bulging through his tank top. He was so LA, so very LA and yet he wasn’t. And that part of him that was so not LA, made her say “Yeah, of course you can.” A/N: Thank you for reading! I really appreciate it! I would love to get feedback on the length. I prefer to write in short pieces but edit them heavily before I post them. I can write longer parts but it will take more time. Also, I know the pacing is a slow so tell me how you do/don’t like that.  Thank you again for reading bb <3

[brattonez]

onlyfans | a. porter

Austin hadn’t told a soul about it. 

It wasn’t that he was embarassed about it. It more about the fact that he felt as if he had told someone about her, they would end up just like how he was now. He fell upon her on the popular porn site a month ago and hadn’t spent a day since without looking at one of her videos. It became so much that he would isolate himself in his room for a while randomly during the day. 

And of course, the boys wondered if something was wrong. Brandon, being the first to pull him to the side and ask if anything was going on. “Nah man trust me, I’m cool.” Is all Austin would say to the pondering questions. Was he though? He didn’t even know anymore. Is it normal to be completely infactuated with a woman you’ve never met in real life? Is this how his fans feel? 

Sitting at his desk in his room, he sighed. His eyes trailed towards his room door, making sure it was locked. He looked at his phone for any texts that would come in the way with what he was about to do and he was more than relieved to see that there weren’t any. Opening up his laptop, he immediately went to her page and smiled once he saw a brand new video uploaded. Clicking on it quickly, a visual of her wearing some fancy purple lingerie graced his screen. Inhaling deeply, he grabbed his lotion and slowly got to work. “Fuck...” Austin mumbles, pleasure ingulfing his entire body as he throws his head back and closing his eyes. 

“Don’t work yourself up too quickly, Austin.”

The 22 year old boy’s entire body freezes. His eyes open and he can’t believe what he sees. The girl that he had been frantically fantasizing about for about a month was right in front of him. On her knees, between his legs, to be exact.  “Wha-” She cuts him off, her hands gripping his thighs tightly. “Don’t speak. You don’t wanna alarm the boys, do you?” She giggles as she eyes his shaft in his hands. “Mm, is this for me?” She asks him before replacing his hand with her own. “Thank you.” 

Austin, bewildered and aroused, brings his hands to his side and watches as she draws a long lick from his base all the way to his tip. His mouth opens, a loud gasp escaping as he tenses up. She moans as she takes him into her mouth, slowly easing down his shaft. Trying her best to fit as much as she can.  Austin brings his hand to the back of her head, guiding her down. She takes this time to bring her free hand to his thigh, caressing and gripping it for extra stimulation. His eyes were closed again, head thrown back. 

This was something he had never felt before. He started to moan louder, suddenly not caring about who would hear him. She begin to hollow her cheeks, sucking him harder. Opening his eyes, he looks down to meet with her eyes looking up at him. They stare at each other for what feels like forever. She takes him out of her mouth and strokes him, smirking. “Does it feel good, Austin? Hm? Does it feel good, baby?” She softly asks him, stroking him faster. He rapidly nods his head, unable to speak as he begins to feel a familiar feeling in the pit of his stomach. She shakes her head. “I need to hear you, honey.” 

With his chest beginning to heave, Austin speaks. “It feels good. Its f-feels soooo g-good...” He tries to his best but soon just starts repeating his sentences over and over. She smiles before inching closer to him. “Are you gonna cum for me?” Now sweating and squirming, he answers quickly. “Yes...” A small giggle comes from her before she ingulfs him in her mouth again. She didn’t need to say anything else. Austin had already got the message. 

His entire body stiffen. Behind his closed eyes, white spots could be seen. Loud gasp escaped his mouth as his orgasm took over him. She gladly accepted his cum, swallowing it all. 

Slowly coming down, Austin opened his eyes. Confusion written all over his face. The girl was gone. His computer screen had went into sleep mode and his desk was ruined. He looked to his left and his right, she was nowhere to be seen. “W-what the f-” A loud knock on his door cuts him off. 

“Yooo, Austin. I know we all got our needs man but next time can you be a little quieter?” Nick’s voice from the door says. “Yeah bro, the whole house heard you singing notes we ain’t ever heard you sing before!” Zion adds. Austin, too much in shock to understand, looks at his computer and sees that he never played the video he was going to. 

Sighing deeply, he leans back in his chair and looks up at the ceiling. He’s silent for a moment before mumbling to himself. 

“I have a fucking problem.” 

A/N: Annddddddd WE BACK!!! With all thats going on, my spring break was extended and gave me just enough time to start writing again. ITS BEEN MONTHS. Anyways, this idea popped in my head while I was on twitter so here it is. I picked Austin because I feel like if any of them was to be in a situation like this...it would be him. Or it could Edwin too. Idk lol. But tell me what yall think in the notes. Yall know I love feedback!

[shushmal]

Written for @ currynim_ on twitter for the @ktdkvalentines​ exchange!

Katsuki knows exactly how much trouble he would be in if he were ever caught. They’d cut him from the king’s guard instantly, strip him of his rank and his sword, and, if he were lucky, banished from the capital. There are much worse rules that Katsuki could be breaking than this one, but fucking the prince is strictly frowned upon, especially by the king, and he’s really asking for it every night he slips into the prince’s rooms and into his bed.

Really though, he tries to reason with himself, it wasn’t as if he could refuse if the prince had ordered Katsuki to fuck him in the first place. It’s his duty to follow any royal command.

Not that Izuku had ever commanded Katsuki to do so much as touch him, of course. But he does look at Katsuki with those green, shining eyes and that small, inviting smile, and it feels a lot like the same thing, feels like Izuku is begging Katsuki to come close, to kiss, to taste, to take.

Honestly, he probably can’t call what they’re doing ‘fucking’ anyways, not anymore.

Not since Izuku himself had snuck out of the castle just to visit Katsuki in his own home while he was down with a fever. There had been an uproar and a hurried search for the missing prince, all while Izuku and Katsuki had been curled up in his too-small bed, in his too-small house, in the soldier’s barracks outside the castle walls.

Izuku still hadn’t been forgiven for his disappearing act, which is why Katsuki has been slipping as quietly as he can into Izuku’s rooms for the past fortnight to visit him in his bed, or his bath, or his study.

“Kacchan,” Izuku groans, tightening his legs around Katsuki’s hips. “Kacchan, faster, please!”

Katsuki growls and picks up the pace, bending Izuku double as he pounds into him, and Izuku moves with him, rolling up to meet every heavy thrust. And Katsuki loves him like this, spread across the sheets beneath him, fair skin flushed pink and his head tossed back in pleasure. His fingers bite into the flesh of Katsuki’s shoulders, urging Katsuki to go faster, fuck him harder, all while jerking up into Katsuki’s hand as he moans.

Cursing, Katsuki comes suddenly, balls tightening and hips shuddering as he fucks though his oragasm. Izuku whines as Katsuki’s rhythm stutters and slows.

“Kacchan, please!”

“Fuck,” Katsuki hisses, lightheaded and pulling his spent cock from Izuku’s opening. Izuku whines as Katsuki replaces it with his fingers, and gasps when Katsuki swallows him down, bucking up into Katsuki’s mouth.

“Oh,” Izuku moans, burying his fingers in Katsuki’s hair. He trembles as Katsuki sucks, bobbing his head and twisting his fingers until Izuku’s coming down his throat with a broken gasp.

Swallowing and panting, Katsuki liks his lips as he pulls off of Izuku and sits back on his heels, still caught between Izuku’s legs. For a moment, he lets himself drink it all in, the mess on Izuku’s creamy thighs, the receding flush across his chest, the way Izuku looks up at him with hazy eyes and a tired smile.

“C’mere,” Izuku murmurs, lifting his arms.

And Katsuki goes, covering Izuku with his body and snaking his arms around Izuku’s middle. Izuku latches on just as tightly, his legs wrapping back around Katsuki’s waist and his arms around Katsuki’s neck.

“Will you stay the night?” he asks, voice gentle in Katsuki’s ear.

“Yes,” Katsuki says. He melts into Izuku’s hold, pulling the covers over the both of them. “Kirishima will distract anyone looking for me.”

Izuku runs his fingers through Katsuki’s hair, scratching at his scalp. “Oh?” he says, surprised. “I hadn’t realized that you’d told anyone.”

“Of course I haven’t told anyone,” Katsuki grumbles. “Kirishima’s just an idiot, and gullible at that.”

He can feel Izuku’s smile when he places a kiss on Katsuki’s head. “I see. And here I thought you’d finally made a friend.”

“Shut the fuck up, your highness.”

Izuku shakes with laughter, his fingers trailing down Katsuki’s neck and back, massaging the tense muscles there. Katsuki lets himself relax into the touch, burying his face against Izuku’s shoulder and breathing him in. Izuku smells like an ocean breeze, salty and fresh and beautiful, and Katsuki can’t get enough, pressing open mouth kisses along his shoulder to taste him.

Humming pleasantly, Izuku presses another kiss to the top of Katsuki’s head. “One day I’ll ask you for your hand,” he says. His words are quiet in the stillness of the night, but Katsuki waits on every syllable. “We’ll run away together and get married, live in a little house in the forest where no one can bother us.”

“Sounds boring,” Katsuki says, worrying a bruise into Izuku’s skin.

“I’ll keep you entertained.”

“Will you now?”

“I’ll take my duties as your husband very seriously,” Izuku says, grinning into Katsuki’s hair. He grinds up into Katsuki’s hip, sending sparks up Katsuki’s spine. “It would not be a hardship.”

Katsuki groans. “You’re insatiable.”

“I can never have enough of you, my dear knight.”

Huffing, Katsuki rises up on his elbows, high enough to catch Izuku’s mouth in a slow, wet kiss. Izuku hums into it, lazily licking into Katsuki’s mouth and tangling his fingers in his hair.

“You’re a menace,” Katsuki huffs, kissing Izuku again as that same familiar heat pools in his belly. “I have to be up at dawn.”

“It’s not my fault you’re so distracting,” Izuku says, smiling against Katsuki’s lips. “You’re too handsome to ignore, especially when you’re already in my bed.”

Katsuki chuckles. He rolls over until Izuku’s resting against his chest, their legs tangled together beneath the blankets. Izuku settles easily against him, his fingers still in Katsuki’s hair. They lay, wound tightly in each other’s arms, and wait for peaceful dreams.

“Kacchan,” Izuku whispers, his voice already thick with sleep.

“Hm?”

“Let’s run away together.”

And it’s not like Katsuki hasn’t thought about it before. Hasn’t dreamed about leaving the castle behind them, making their own way in this life, venturing to far away lands and showing Izuku everything this world has to offer him. But Izuku was heir to a powerful nation with a history of bloody wars and cruel kings. Izuku’s own father was a distant figure, a man who led his country from behind a wall, who sent his people into battle on self-serving whims.

One day Izuku would be a kind, just king. The world needed him here, more than Katsuki needed him outside the city’s gates.

“My prince is made for greater things,” Katsuki finally says, holding Izuku closer. “And I’ll be honored to follow and protect him for as long as he lives.”

Izuku’s fingers tighten in his hair. “And what of me?” he asks.

“And you.” Gently, Katsuki draws back, so he can see Izuku’s face in the dim light of the moon, so he can brush aside those tears that have slipped from his eyes. “I will love you until my last breath, and beyond.”

The smile that blooms on Izuku’s face is something Katsuki will never forget, will remember for all of his days. He kisses him, tasting his tears and his joy as Izuku whispers back, “I love you.” They fall asleep like that, pressed close together and basking in each other’s warmth.

Morning comes too soon for Katsuki, but he rises before the sun unprompted, as he’s always done since he was a squire. Izuku has curled himself into Katsuki’s front in the night, halfway buried beneath him and his face hidden against Katsuki’s collar with one leg thrown around Katsuki’s waist. Smiling, Katsuki pulls until Izuku’s in his lap, still fast asleep and snoring when Katsuki sits up. Katsuki gives himself a long moment to hold him, breathing him in and admiring the soft lines of his prince’s face, relaxed in sleep.

He wants this every morning for the rest of his life, but Katsuki will be content with whatever time he is allowed.

“You’re beautiful,” he murmurs, kissing Izuku’s forehead, his cheeks, his nose. “I love you.”

Izuku doesn’t stir, even when Katsuki chuckles and lays him back into bed. Meticulously, he dons his discarded clothes and armor, before picking up his sword where it had been propped up against the foot of Izuku’s bed, not feeling the slightest bit guilty leaving Izuku with the mess on his bedding.

Before he leaves, he carefully leans down, pressing one last kiss to Izuku’s sleeping face, basking in his own joy, his love, his hopes, before slinking out the door, closing it with a near inaudible click.

“Ah, Sir Bakugou.”

Katsuki stiffens.

“I was hoping to catch you this morning,” the queen says, her voice pleasant and low in the early morning quiet.

Swallowing, Katsuki turns and immediately drops into a low bow. “My queen,” he says simply and nothing else, dread pooling in the pit of his stomach.

Whatever he’d been feeling before, the pleasant ache of his muscles or the warmth in his chest leaves him in an instant. He’s thankful that Izuku’s still slumbering peacefully on the other side of this door. Hopes that he won’t wake until Katsuki’s already been banished or beheaded, so he won’t have to see Izuku’s face when Katsuki breaks his promise.

“You’ve not been as discreet as you should be,” Queen Inko says, amusement in her voice.

Katsuki immediately drops to his knee, head bowed low. “My queen, please show mercy on the prince,” he says, quickly. “Do what you must to me, but forgive him please—”

He jumps, startled when the queen kneels before him, lays a hand on his shoulder.

“Quiet, please,” she says, and Katsuki falls silent. “I am not here to threaten or punish you, either of you. Already you have set my heart at ease.”

Warily, Katsuki looks up, and Inko smiles at him with the same kind, loving eyes that belong to the prince.

“Please understand,” she says quietly. “It is just as dangerous within the castle walls as it is outside of them. But I am pleased my son has followed his heart and found a person worthy of his love and loyalty. I would not put an end to his happiness, no matter the cost.”

“The cost?” Katsuki asks carefully.

Inko just smiles. “Do you promise to protect him?” she asks, her voice a bare whisper. Her words are a promise of darkness ahead, at odds with her gentle nature. “From any who would harm him?”

“I swear it.” Katsuki doesn’t hesitate, meeting Inko’s eyes. “I swear it on my life and honor.”

Cupping his face in her small hands, Inko bows her head before him. “Then from this moment on, never leave my son’s side. Never leave him defenseless. Never leave him to danger. This is the task I command you as your queen.”

“On my blade, I am bound to your word,” Katsuki says.

She raises her head then, and presses a light kiss to Katsuki’s brow before she stands again.

“On my crown, I am bound to your blood,” she replies.

The queen touches the crown of Katsuki’s head once more, before continuing her way past, towards the throne room.

Stiffly, Katsuki rises, breathing deeply. He feels on edge, suitably wary of the warning in the queen’s words, but relieved at the same time. Without another thought or hesitation, he slips back into Izuku’s rooms, set on his new duty as a knight of the royal guard.

Many years later, after a bloody revolution that leaves their nation cleaved in two and their distant king dead, Katsuki will still be standing at Izuku’s side, watching carefully as his prince is crowned, as his lover takes up the throne with scarred hands, standing tall and proud before their people. He’ll remember that oath he made to his queen back when he was still just a child playing at being a man, and know that he’d made the right decision.

Katsuki will catch Inko’s eye, her smile tired and proud when she bobs her head to him, both glad they still live to watch Izuku become rule.

[unproduciblesmackdown]

The opposite of your last post for the ask meme! Like 1, 5, 9..

thank you lol sorry it took me a minute to get to posting these answers......i also skipped a couple that got asked previously via answering all primes lol

1: What inspires you?

hm well just basic stuff like “being in a good mood” lol or “being hyped up by friends” or “having reason to be particularly excited about something” which is all like, factors that Contribute Energy......learning about stuff / trying something and discovering like oh i’m Into this thing, or that for whatever reason something turns out to be more within reach / doable than i might’ve thought, like, hey i wanna get on this maybe.......~creatively~ it’s great to like, see other ppl’s art, and while i’ve sure been Inspired by professional artists, overall i’m more like, influenced and motivated by seeing the styles / specific works of Online Randos like me.......i also Draw to create [self-indulgent (usually fairly) niche fanart which is also probably gay and is all the time of characters i like] so like, the Stuff I Wanna Make Fanart Of (which has Whatever characters i specifically would like to draw lol) is sure directly Inspiring in that way. i’d say i never had that experience of like, ppl being kids and seeing some [distributed work in a certain art medium] like oh i want to make my own [distributed work in a certain art medium] as in like, i wanna publish a book, i wanna make movies, etc, but i guess i Did b/c i was like elementary school age in the early-to-mid 00s and experienced some instances of online fanart like :o :o wow damn ppl can do that?? just be a rando drawing fanart and sharing it w/ other people online???? and today i am living that dream, so good for me lol. and also i’d like to shoutout marge simpson anime, which is a particular piece of Online Art (technically fanart even lol) which was like, unusually Motivating as a single work of art lol, i made a notes app fanart like immediately and then a way more “painterly” piece of fanart that was v directly inspired by it lol.......and i was sure Drawing It Up last last winter when bmc 3.0 was impending / happening, b/c i got into like Just in the dec before, so that was Fresh, and then bam the Content is happening concurrently and as soon as we even just learned that jeremy has glasses i immediately spent like honestly 25 consecutive hours making fanart for that exact Inspiration. we didn’t even know abt the hello kitty shoes yet!!! and naturally im not out here for stats or clout but it is Inspiring when ppl enjoy the stuff i make and let me know one way or another. [tag comments that express enthusiasm in any way.....Appreciated]

9: Do you trust people easily, or do people have to earn your trust?

i have to say i am wary! that’s in part just like, a default anxiety defensive mode lol. but it takes me a hot minute (aka weeks....or months.....) to realize when someone like, would like to be friends or something, so while i can be Friendly and Outgoing w/ people like, immediately, i’m not picking up relationships left and right that are close enough that i’d particularly talk about “trust” or whatever. i’m not necessarily Distrustful either lol, it’s more just like, again re: the constant wariness thing. it is not unlike a cat lmao i vibe with them lol i Get that [approach]....and there’s been times i’ve been like “hmm i sure do Not vibe with this person ever and am not comfortable around them / interacting with them to any extent beyond occasional casual interactions that i don’t super enjoy. that’s me being overly anxious and failing to be personable i guess!!” and then that person Does give that reason down the line like oh, actually, that eternal uneasiness was warranted :/ damb

21: How does someone become friends with you?

yknow i was like “didn’t i Also answer this one previously” but it turned out the question i was thinking of, which i Had answered, was “how does someone become important to you” lmao.....same diff

tbh it’s kind of an arduous process lmao like. first of all i am Bad about initiating shit, and a lot of times will like, be wary of Directly Interacting with people for a while b/c i am also Bad At not being too passive / unwilling to assert anything so like, if someone’s regularly interacting with me but i’m not into it / Eventually Realize i’m not into it, it’s that thing again where my main strat is [v gradually sidle away] lol and just find it difficult to extricate myself from interactions / relationships and so that plays into me really feeling like i have to have some real confidence that i’d get on with / vibe with someone Before i start significantly interacting with / getting involved with them which....is also difficult natch lol like. can’t rly get a great feel for what someone’s like w/o talking to them.......but then if i Distance myself at all at any point will that be taken as rejection or whatever.......and then anyways say i Am talking to someone, then it’s like, also i’m just not fantastic at casual conversation always and that stage where you don’t know someone too well and talking is mostly a Polite Ritual and it’s like oh god don’t mess up, respond Normally lmaoo......i am nervous. and i also have a tendency to just naturally try to make an interaction go smoothly than immediately prioritize / feel comfortable busting out My Personality lmao.....so then even if ppl are responding well enough it’s like ah jeez i know we’re all performing always but have i shown them What I’m Actually Like to any significant degree, am i just masking it up / mirroring the crap out of how they talk?? and also it then takes me quite a while to put together “if someone keeps talking to you / choosing to interact with you for like, weeks, it probably means they want to / are interested in doing so” lol.........and then i’ll take ages more of trying to consciously Be More Myself without *also* feeling like this is too much of an act lol, and gradually picking up like oh they’re still not like, annoyed or disinterested or something..............what i am trying to say is it sure takes a minute lol

also when i Am attempting sometimes to like [initiate interaction] with people my version of being Active is still not all that active lmao i will be like [occasional Like] or [even more occasional reply] or [tag comments or no comments coz it’s twitter and im rt-ing stuff] and it’s like oh wow if we’re not having more regular interaction i suppose i’ve failed or something?? does this mean anything further lol, did i do anything.....but welp gotta have that perspective that Not Necessarily lol and i’m not the only person in the world who might not make friends or even friendly acquaintances easily / at the drop of a hat and u can’t necessarily read way into shit that hasn’t Actually been communicated to you.......naturally though it is easier to have some ~perspective~ and Serenity about all this sort of thing when you do already have some Friends lmao........been feeling (and consciously nudging myself towards feeling) More Chill about say like, friendly acquaintances i have who aren’t raring to interact with me on the reg.......ppl i’ll go months or half a year or more between having a convo with and then we’ll be like trading dm’s for a couple days and then it’s back to not really talking, and that Is What It Is, not necessarily a tragedy, and really it feels “rude” to acknowledge to myself like oh i’m not sure that me and whomever even Vibe well enough that *i’d* be raring to talk all the time either, but hey, it’s also true, i don’t have to be Validated by ppl who know me having me in their friend circles in any significant way......i be out here on the peripheral / outer orbits and i can appreciate that for what it is, even if, again, easier to be more Cool with that when i’m not Only in ppl’s periphery...........i appreciate the pal i have who like, 99% of how we Communicate is occasionally sending each other pics of our cats, not very intimate but also back when i was offline for months on end they eventually went out of their way to find someone to get in touch with to verify i hadn’t like died or anything lol........i appreciate the Gestures of Caring that ppl have and do extend, even if we do not actually talk regularly. 

and like also i’m bad at like. idk the main way i talk is again, At Some Length and often about real specific shit lol so im like woop aware that many ppl are not into that, or they might be down for having an exchange like that for a day and then they’re done.........not at all like wholly Against more lol Conversational conversations but i gotta say that’s more of a struggle lmao..........so let’s say befriending me takes some Patience. i kinda operate on [cat] rules. jellicle

25: How do you stop yourself from going back to toxic people?

i absolutely am Refraining from launching off on a ted talk of a tangent that is also me being the [the guy about to throw down a card on the pile on the table and that card pile is like “any conversation” and the guy is labeled “me” and the One Card about to be played is labeled “it’s capitalism” or smthing like that and also it’s all in spanish].jpg.......

anyways idk just try to keep things in perspective, right......i generally am pretty Passive about gradually sidling away from relationships that are bad and so by the time i Have exited them it’s pretty overdue lmao and i get to be quite confident that it was The Right Thing........and just when looking back on stuff it’s like, well if you remember the Good or “Not That Bad(tm)” parts maybe consciously think about the whole of it And specifically the Bad parts / the reasons for peacing out.......also the other day i was mulling over some standard [conflicted / complicated feelings about having cut certain ppl out entirely] and it also occurred to me that a lot of the [conflicted] feeling part came from sympathy for them, whereas from the perspective of Entirely My Own Feelings On The Matter minus that “how do/would they feel about it” consideration, the thought of never interacting w/ these ppl is like. fine with me lol........stuff like this is always Complicated and Individual and there’s certainly no like, one-stop simple Guide To Navigating All This Kind Of Thing, Cmon It’s Easy........another consideration i saw the other day via a graphic on twitter, which is probably most relevant re: say, controlling / abusive Partners, was how like, to think about how someone is acting if they’re saying you should Take Them Back b/c they’ve Changed their behavior, but to pay attention to if they’re trying to guilt you into it / justifying or downplaying their previous behavior / shifting blame and otherwise manifesting the inherently harmful and controlling patterns that are supposed to be gone now........anyways yeah complicated stuff and also just p.s. (and what would’ve been the jumping off point for the It’s-Capitalism tangential essay lol) ppl shouldn’t be blamed if they do choose to let someone back in their life like oh now they’re responsible for bringing their mistreatment upon themself.....no better than blaming someone for, say, having a harmful / controlling romantic partner in the first place like oh well they should’ve known better than to have gotten involved with this person..........ppl are in control of their own abusive behavior and shouldn’t be considered Forces Of Nature no matter how intransigent they are

33: Do you have someone you know you can always rely on?

tbt question 9 lol there’s defo some people that i do trust! love it....

45: Do you consider yourself creative?

another #tbt to question 1 lol.......i mean Yes i am creative in ways but like, who Isn’t, really.......think sometimes “creativity” means “do you like, do Art things” which, yes i do, but then within that there’s art that’s deemed more ~creative~ or w/e......not to mention that i don’t think something has to be definitively labeled an Art to be creative. like, for example, Science and Art aren’t opposites / the antithesis of each other, and anytime defines ~science~ as like, people just memorizing and outputting Facts and Numbers and considers this a distinction from Being An Artist.....wild and i Will fight you lmao. i tell you i can v much remember times i have had to completely disengage to keep from losing my cool at people arguing about “why i respect science but could only be an artist :’|” or “why Art is actually harder than Science and also we’re the underdogs b/c society values science so much more :’|” like.....mf...........anyways scientific pursuits may certainly have a different Methodology (see: scientific method) than art but lbr it still requires creativity and science and art are friends you fucking fools................and then also just zooming in on the Art-Making business here, i also like, have never had any interest in coming up with Original stories / characters and the like, and i don’t enjoy trying and it just really is not my thing, and it’s Funny or something when people wanna say that creative fanworks have value b/c they let ppl cut their teeth for what really matters, inevitably making their own original content(tm)......that isn’t inevitable for me lol and certainly is nothing i aim to do ever, and when there’s the suggestion that if you’re Good enough at ur medium you gotta manifest some of that original the character do not steal shit.........anyways i’m not pressed to claim i am an Artist(tm) or Creative(tm) lol like i guess technically i am both but i have no professional aspirations and my brain does not Do [generate original content] so it’s all like, i’m just out here.........s/o to this time i was trying to do my fuckin thing drawing on a tablet in a cafe and some random annoying guy is trying to talk and i happen to mention like “lol i don’t exactly call myself an artist really” and Guy goes “OH REALLY??? WHAT’S WRONG WITH ARTISTS? WHAT’S YOUR ISSUE WITH ART” like please cool it lmao but god p sure it was a guy who was just. very Around and very annoying in general

49: Do you feel like you’re a good person?

yeah i think i’m alright but really what is the use in like considering there 2 be achievable Good or Bad Person Statuses for everyone........let’s say it’s an ongoing, active state to be in the process of consciously choosing to be Good and working towards Better. especially considering that We Live In A Society which tries to teach everyone and continuously imbues our existence with Bad Messages about how to perceive and engage with other people, and being A Good Person is a lifelong effort and it’s unhelpful to feel that if you’re already Good or well-intentioned enough you can just dust off your hands and be like “well my work here is done” and be unprepared to examine your beliefs/actions or deal with the might-as-well-assume-it’s-an-inevitability that even if u have some noble-ass beliefs you’ll fail to live up to them at some point/s.......so like yeah lol again i feel like i am a pretty good person but can always be better and ought to be aware of / willing to work on that at any point

[guylty]

My annual social media Lent is coming up. From Ash Wednesday I will abstain from Twitter for the next 6 and a half weeks (until Easter Sunday), allowing me to recalibrate a little and concentrate on other things. Such as my blog – or RAnet. That means I need blog fodder. Almost four weeks have passed since The Stranger launched on Netflix. Enough time to assume that most fans and readers have watched the show and will not be spoiled by the discussion of the show. Moreover, some more in-depth discussions have already started in the comments. Last weekend, for instance, we got into the intracacies of the “bar scene” in episode 4 of TS, talking about the casting, costuming and directing of that particular scene and how we, as women of a particular age reacted to that scene.

However, it would probably make more sense to start at the beginning. So anyone who’d like to discuss TS with me, you are welcome to write your observations, reactions and opinions in the comments. I know I am kind of launching into this without announcement. But by doing this episode by episode, I hope you can follow along and catch up with individual episode if need be. I’ll also try and summarise every episode at the beginning of each review post so we know what we are talking about. Hm, I may need to rewatch the show for that. The hardship!!! However, the discussion will probably focus on the plot… eh… Adam. Anyhow, I hope you’ll join me and share your thoughts either here – or your own blog, if you are blogging, too.

The Stranger – Episode 1 Recap

Prior to the trailer, TS starts with teenagers at a bonfire party, culminating in a naked boy escaping through the dark forest. The plot then begins with the Price boys driving in the car to the football club where younger son Ryan is trying out for the A team. While at the club, daddy Adam briefly speaks with his wife Corinne on the phone. She is away at a teachers’ conference while Adam looks after their sons. In the clubhouse, Adam is approached by “a stranger” who reveals a devastating secret to him: His wife faked her pregnancy a couple of years ago. He is shocked and disturbed.

Once back home after football training, Adam can’t resist checking the details the stranger passed on to him, and sure enough, his suspicions are confirmed – there is a credit card payment for a fishy website called Novelty Funsy, and the ultrasound scan of the miscarried baby does not quite match the ones of his two sons. Meanwhile, Adam’s elder son Thomas heads out to the bonfire party with his friends.

The next morning, police woman Johanna investigates a bizarre crime scene of a decapitated alpaca in the city centre. With her DS, she drives to a nearby alpaca farm to confirm where the animal came from. On their return trip their attention is attracted by some pieces of clothing in the forest. They follow the trail of clothes and find a naked body. The young man is still alive.

Adam meanwhile looks after his day job – he is the legal advisor to an obstinate tenant who refuses to move out of a house that has been earmarked for demolition. Upon his return, Corinne arrives back from her conference and Adam receives confirmation that the mysterious credit card payments are for a website that provides fake pregnancy products. He immediately confronts Corinne. She does neither deny nor explain why or what she did, only hinting that there is more to it than he thinks. The Prices spend the night in separate bedrooms.

The next morning Adam observes Corinne taking a phone call outside the house. She later suggests to Adam that they talk later that day after a school awards ceremony where she will explain all. However, Corinne never shows to the event. Adam receives a text message asking for some time apart.

The episode ends with Thomas revealing the decapitated alpaca head in his cupboard.

  Episode 1 – Discuss

So, first of all – I have watched the first episode about three and a half times. Twice on my own, once with hubster, and finally today a quick run-through for the sake of the recap where I fast forwarded through a lot of scenes, focussing on Adam mostly. I couldn’t help it… My first response to the show at the very first viewing was – WOW! I remember that I was fully engaged during every minute of it – even the scenes and story lines that Richard did not feature in. Granted, I was most interested  with the “grown-up” arcs, not least because anything involving drugs and other goings-on with teenagers makes *this* mama really worried. But having said that, I think the first episode was very effective in establishing the storylines and the characters. Hence the show spends most time following Adam (Richard Armitage) – as a father, as a lawyer and as a husband. Then there are the two police officers who also are presented as round characters – the middle-aged senior officer Johanna (Siobhan Finneran) approaching retirement who has just decided to split from her husband, and her much younger partner, a gay black man. Adam’s son Thomas also gets a good bit of screen time with his friends, making him more than just secondary. Other secondary characters include first and foremost Dervla Kirwan as Corinne, Stephen Rea as obstinate tenant Martin, and Jennifer Saunders as Johanna’s BFF Heidi.

So, the first watch was highly exciting and addictive, so much so that I basically binged the whole show. On second and subsequent views, I found the episode not quite as fast and exciting anymore – only natural, as a lot of time was actually spent setting up the characters and the various story lines: Johanna waking up in bed to her snoring husband; Johanna meeting Heidi in her café; observing the teenagers at their bonfire party; visiting Dante in hospital…

RA is the natural focal point from the get-go. Not only for fangirls, I might add. The show is really good at setting him up as the perfect family man who obviously has great rapport with his sons, both the “difficult” almost grown-up older son, but also the younger lad who needs a different kind of care than a young adult. I found the casting really great, with Thomas definitely matching the tall, dark, handsome vibes of TV-dad Richard, and younger boy Ryan more a mirror of his blond, curly-haired TV-mum. They all have great chemistry together, and found Misha Handley (Ryan) very natural and convincing. Jacob Dudman as Thomas was also great.

… really aged well… hehe

RA really shines in the confrontation scenes, both with the stranger and with his wife, when he has to convey both suppressed anger and outright fury at having been deceived. Both his major scenes with Corinne are very convincing, and I appreciated the decision to make Adam extremely angry, on the verge of volatile, when Corinne refuses to explain her actions. Adam’s anger is immediate, raw and confused and Armitage really draws the viewer on his side with his emotional outburst. So much so that I basically missed Dervla Kirwan’s nuanced acting in that scene. On second and subsequent viewings, once you know how the show ends and why she doesn’t want to talk immediately, you start to notice the little things: her refusal to talk has more to do with fear than with anger or denial. She is afraid of actually addressing the fact that the reason for her faked pregnancy will also bring another secret out in the open, and the subsequent discussion (which she had successfully avoided by faking the pregnancy in the first place) will now have to take place. What might have looked as callous or dismissive at first viewing, conveys much more detail the second time round: there is a sadness to Corinne that Kirwan expresses very subtly – in a slight pause, or the tiniest glance into the mid-distance. The same applies to their second and much calmer confrontation the next morning. What might have looked almost callous on first viewing, gains much more weight when you watch it with prior knowledge of the plot. When Adam says he has lost trust in her, Corinne replies “it hurts, doesn’t it?“. The question tag really stood out to me on first viewing. It confused me. Why is she phrasing it like that? It of course became clear in episode 4, but again, Kirwan really gave it a spin by loading it with subtle sadness that doesn’t only confuse the viewer but also Adam. Armitage here kept his response at just the right level of confusion without giving away how much Adam really recognises or understands what she was hinting at. RA reacts with great detail expressions. No words are needed. And in hindsight you can see how he begins to wonder whether she knows about his affair. Loved it.

Let’s talk a bit about Armitage’s look in this show. Such a spectacle!

Yes, I like details like that. The jury is still out on whether this is a prescription that Armitage wrote into the script himself 😂, or whether we just had a costume department that is on the ball. Yes, it’s time for the presbyopic lenses. Happens to most of us at around middle age. 🤓 I found it a lovely detail that makes Adam more relatable. Because – a dad bod he has not.

Even if he claims he does. I find this a rather attractive package for a middle aged family man. Also:

Bonus WRP. Needs no further elaboration

But to get back to the look and style – I enjoyed the casual style of Adam. Once again, it felt right – nothing too fancy, with windbreaker, jeans and shirts, and even a tracksuit at home, the perfect attire for a father of two (pre-) teen sons. I was surprised how good RA looked in other colours than just black and blue. The red polo shirt was very nice on him.

I can’t say I am as convinced of the costumes provided for Corinne. In fact, I think there were some rather sledge-hammer style decisions going on there, putting the wife and mother into rather dowdy, pale pink mom trousers and giving her a hole-pattern, fluffy knit jumper. Then there was that turquoise dress that went slightly longer than her knees – apparently the work wear for female teachers in English private schools, judging by an equally frumpy outfit for Corinne’s colleague and friend Vicky? (This observation I will come back to in a later post once we get to episode 4.) It just kind of made me think that Corinne was made to look older and less casual than her husband who even attends to his client in jeans and shirt…

Police officer Johanna Griffin OTOH looked *real* and great. (I kept double-taking because O’Brien’s severe look kept coming back to me.) And I loved Heidi’s funky style – very much the slightly crazy café-owner with a café as stylish as herself… And can we also mention the Price’s residence here? There were only quick first glimpses of their house – but oh, that stylist made it a gorgeous family home. The garden was beautiful but I can take it or leave it. Too much work – I don’t like to get my fingers dirty. But the dining area with the floor-to-ceiling windows and the sleek white kitchen? Big win, especially because it doesn’t look like a showroom but has photos on the fridge and a mess on the counters.

So episode 1 gets a big thumbs up from me – for introducing us to almost all the characters (some held back for more surprise later on) and establishing the plot. Yes, there is a lot going on here, which I haven’t even all mentioned in the recap: the stranger dropping her first bomb, the Price family life, the secret in Corinne’s past, the tenant who refuses to move out of his home, the colleague who has trouble with her pre-teen daughter, the teenagers who are partying under the influence of drugs, the mystery of the boy who was hunted through the forest, the curious story of the decapitated alpaca, an almost-comic police duo, a police officer who is splitting up with her hubby, her friend, the funky café owner, the gregarious neighbour, the busybody football trainer… Too much? I’d say a lot of it is deliberate overload to distract us, yet give us some extra info about the characters, their work, their life and their environment.

The strategy definitely works when you watch the show for the first time. You are busy dealing with Richard Armitage’s overwhelming handsomeness taking it all in. The questions only really pop up when you watch again.  Such as: When stoned Mike takes the alpaca for a walk into the city centre, why is there no CCTV footage? I mean, nowadays there is hardly *any* urban area that does *not* have CCTV on shops and banks or traffic spots. How come no one saw him decapitating the alpaca, in a city centre? And how did he manage to decapitate it anyway`- it’s hardly a one-chop job?Likewise and with hindsight we know now that Corinne’s text message was not sent by her at all: But how did the sender actually know the password to Corinne’s phone to send that message? I mean, don’t all people lock their phone with a password these days? Possibly nit-picking questions, but that’s the fun of it, isn’t it? You can enjoy a show immensely – and still want to pick a few holes into the plot just to see whether you are cleverer than the writer 😉.

There is probably so much more to discuss, but for the sake of getting the discussion started, here is the post. What is your take on the first episode of TS? Any agreements with me, or disagree? Other points of interest? Let me know in the comments!

Let’s Talk About… #TheStranger – Episode 1 My annual social media Lent is coming up. From Ash Wednesday I will abstain from Twitter for the next 6 and a half weeks (until Easter Sunday), allowing me to recalibrate a little and concentrate on other things.

[unfortunate-stranger-losers]

What are your headcannons for the kids from the four main All the Wrong Questions series?

oh geez there are so many 

Lemony Snicket

Listen every character in the Snicketverse is autistic but Lemony? HIGH.KEY. This boy cannot stand sensory overload and also stims with verbal recitation. 

After several months in Stain’d-by-the-Sea, the Associates got used to him just showing up and taking food. He eventually stopped asking, and then eventually stopped using the door. Moxie has, more than once, come downstairs to find him sitting on her counter eating cereal. 

Beatrice snuck into town once to see how he was doing, saw him and Moxie trying to jump off the roof of the diner with a tablecloth parachute and Jake dragging them back and screaming, and she just turned right the fuck around and reported to their friends, “yeah he’s fine.” 

Kit made him promise not to tell Jacques that she was almost in jail. 

MODERN AU: Gets into twitter and tumblr fights with obvious trolls. Tried to call CPS on Theodora just to see what would happen. Can recite any “Unraveled” YouTube video on command. Has an extensive knowledge of Pokemon. 

Moxie Mallahan

listen this girl is a lesbian in denial and she wrote Ellington Feint a note that said “get out of my town” because she didn’t know what else to do

She always kinda knew that her Mother was never coming back for her, but she didn’t admit it aloud until after Lemony left. 

Moxie: I can eat ten marshmallows at once. Kellar: You are a hazard to yourself. Lemony: And a coward. Do twenty 

Moxie knows how to pick every kind of lock, and how to break into every window. She takes her journalism very seriously and will get the truth even if she has to flip the world off as she does it. 

MODERN AU: Blogger. Once spent a week straight putting together a project and then passed out for forty-eight hours. Still carries a typewriter with her everywhere. Had to physically stop Lemony from eating a tide pod. 

Ellington Feint 

Had literally no idea Lemony had a crush on her because she’s just that gay. 

Actually popped up around town inbetween books constantly, mainly to chill with Cleo, Jake, the Bellerophons, and even Ornette. They just all neglected to mention this to Lemony. 

She doesn’t remember anything about her mother. All she knows is what her father told her; that her mother used to make music boxes, loved coffee, and died in a fire. 

Goes through a huge rebel/outlaw phase after escaping with Kit, because she’s completely lost and has no idea what to do or who to trust; her own father never gave a shit about her, as she now knows, so how could anyone care? Eventually she made her way back to Stain’d-by-the-Sea, where Moxie found her crying in the attic of Black Cat Coffee and awkwardly invited her to live in the lighthouse. 

MODERN AU: Has been on the run from CPS for so fucking long. Quotes Gilmore Girls almost daily and will argue your ear off about why Rory/Paris should’ve been endgame. Once ate a tide pod. Cries while watching the Addams Family. 

Kellar Haines 

Even after the Train Incident, he basically lives with Moxie. He just can’t trust his Mom anymore, and while he claims otherwise, they didn’t really have a good relationship before then, either. Lizzie stays with him. 

His special interest is in codemaking. He would’ve been really valuable to VFD if he’d gotten recruited. As is, Moxie kicks the ass of anyone who tries to kidnap him, so he’s fine. 

He’s also super good at crafting, and can make really cool art projects whenever he has the time. Lizzie used to give him art supplies whenever she could, and still hangs his drawings on the lighthouse fridge. 

He just gets so tired of his friends’ shit. He’d be a Mom Friend if he made any effort to stop them but as is he just kinda watches crap go down. 

MODERN AU: Constantly goes to the movie theater just to chill. Addicted to YouTube. Is the only one of the squad not freaked out by the Watership Down movie. Asks existential questions at random to scare the squad and then immediately says “yeet” in a deadpan voice and throws Squeak across the room. 

Pip and Squeak Bellerophon 

They took over the taxi for their Dad when he fell ill. He died a few months later, and they kept claiming he was alive, in fear that they would get separated by whoever was in charge of their case. The only person they told is Jake, because he eventually followed them home to ask their Dad why the fuck he didn’t feed them and found that they were living alone, and Cleo, because Jake can’t keep secrets from her. 

Pip and Squeak used to fight a lot, though they never intended any real harm. They slowly stopped after they started living alone, and Pip started kinda taking charge of keeping him and Squeak safe. 

They used to be very tight with Qwerty, because they were constantly at the library. He suspected their situation, but never confirmed it and was alright just making sure the kids were okay. Squeak would sometimes climb on the bookshelves and knock them over, but thankfully Qwerty thought this was funny. 

Squeak likes to “adopt” stray animals he finds in the backyard. Whenever he walks in going “gUESS WHO OUR NEW SIBLING IS,” Pip has to guess whether he’s going to bring in an injured baby bunny he can nurse back to health, or a squirrrel he just caught who is still struggling and about to destroy half the house. 

MODERN AU: Pip has a Nintendo Switch that Squeak can only play Animal Crossing on. Squeak keeps posting photos on Instagram of him and Pip driving illegally but everyone thinks they’re edits. Squeak once very seriously told Pip that he would have to marry Jake so they could keep getting free food from him (before they found out he was dating Cleo). Have slept in library closets before and will again. 

Cleo Knight 

Identifies as Demi-bi. She and Jake met as preteens, when she wandered off and got lost, and went into the diner to use the phone and call Zada and Zora. Afterwards, she kept sneaking out to visit him. 

Was much closer to Zada and Zora than her parents. She used to hang out in the kitchen with them, laying on the counter and practicing calculations or studying advanced chemistry while they cooked. 

Also very very autistic. Can only eat certain things, because she has huge texture problems. Only Zada, Zora and Jake have ever gone out of their way to accommodate her without complaint. 

Is incredibly reckless and never thinks anything through. While everyone knows she can take care of herself, it’s still nerve-wracking to see her run out the window, leaving only a note saying she’ll be back in three hours after trying to find a chemical, and coming back covered in blood that’s not her own. 

MODERN AU: Was a Guardians of Ga’Hoole kid. Would exist on a diet of cheetos, cereal and sprite if not for her boyfriend. Once, Ornette helped her break out of the house to go to the movie theater to watch Lego Batman. Super into Stranger Things. 

Jake Hix 

Literally is the only reason the Associates are still alive. He gives them food and makes sure they don’t kill themselves doing some stupid reckless stuff. 

Surprisingly, though, Cleo has had to physically stop him from fistfighting S Theodora Markson, who keeps forgetting to feed her fucking apprentice

Jake: As soon as I hit 18 I’m adopting you. Pip and Squeak, not even glancing over: Lit. 

Has been in love with Cleo since they met. Since their relationship is technically “secret”, Hungry pretends not to notice, despite how increasingly obvious it gets. She knows she should technically discourage this, but he’s just. so in love. When he’s not working, he spends his time in him and Cleo’s garden. 

MODERN AU: Has threatened to put parental locks on Lemony and Moxie’s phones multiple times. Keeps quoting The Princess Bride at Cleo, to the annoyance of the other Associates around them. Actually super into Doctor Who. Also keeps beating everyone’s ass in Mario Kart. 

Ornette Lost 

Has never once understood what was going on, but honestly she just rolls with it. “Guess we’re doing this now? Okay.” 

Keeps bringing stray cats into her Uncles’ house and adopting them. She has twelve now. There is no stopping her. 

Super close with Cleo and Jake. Mainly because she doesn’t mind third-wheeling, and will just fold origami when she gets bored, but also because she’s pretty good at dropping life advice and also is shockingly hilarious. 

Lemony: Ornette. Why did the toaster blow up. Ornette: Hm?Lemony: Toaster. Blew up. Ornette: Oh. Yeah I blew it up Lemony: why Ornette:  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

MODERN AU: Very into anime, especially Fullmetal Alchemist. Lives on ice cream. Has OPINIONS on the Disney Reboots. She got expelled from school because she graffitied GAY RIGHTS on the side of the building, and then a couple of middle fingers. 

Lizzie Haines 

INCREDIBLY protective of Kellar. She had more part in raising him than their mother; she was reluctant to leave him for her apprenticeship, but he convinced her he’d be fine. 

Sharon was a huge perfectionist in regards to Lizzie’s talents and studies, so Lizzie always felt very distant from her. When she left for her apprenticeship, she ended up bonding with Sally Murphy, to the point where Lizzie saw her as more of a parent figure. 

Lizzie noticed suspicious activity going on around town, and started investigating, even though Sally didn’t think anything was wrong. Lizzie had a conspiracy board and everything. She was kidnapped just as she was piecing everything together. 

It took her quite a few months to break out, but once she did, she immediately went hardcore and figured out how best to knock people out and keep them away from her. She had a lot of trauma that emerged after the Train Incident, but Kellar got very good at figuring out how to calm her down. 

MODERN AU: Hangs Christmas lights around her room and glowing stars on her ceiling. Knows more about Sonic the Hedgehog lore than the other Associates could ever understand. Huge Marvel/Star Wars fan. She has memorized all of Chicago, Hairspray, Black Panther, The Empire Strikes Back and Mamma Mia. 

[robbybirdy]

simmer - get to know

 simmer - get to know  🔍 by @cupcakegnome​

tagged by: @CowPlantStuff

your name: Robyn, 😲😲😲

languages you speak:English.

your play style: Honestly, depends on the day. Some days I feel like I only build. But the days when I do CAS I always do it actual game playing. I take screenshots whenever I see one of my sims is being strange. 

your simself picture: I can’t find a hair that looks similar to my hair. 

stories or gameplay, builds, lookbooks, edits or cc:

Stories all the way. I may post a build but, that is always associated with my story. The same can be said with lookbooks.

your favourite age state:

Honestly, I like teenagers, Parenthood made them so EXTRA and I love it. 

your favourite season:

Winter

your favourite holiday:

Real Life: Christmas / In game: Winterfest

how was your day:

Ok, nothing really happened. Looking at all my screenshots that I take for my stories. And they are really funny.

your favourite career:

Hm… maybe the artist's career, because I usually go for that career.

your favourite aspiration:

Big Happy Family. I love it because it is challenging trying to keep eight sims alive. Even though right now in the Random Alphabet Legacy Challenge I have seven sims and three dogs. Making that 10 beings living in this house. Thank god for the selectable pets mod.

your favourite ep, sp or gp:

I like Get Together. I know that there are a lot of people who say that they don’t use the club systems or don’t go to Windenburg, or whatever. However, I love Get Together, because it helps children and teens meet other people their age. Because you can’t have your sim talk to their friends at school like they did in the Sims 3. The option they have for them is to meet new friends. 

how old is your simblr:

I celebrated my first anniversary of my simblr in November of 2019. 

Have you woohooed

Hahaha nope

your favourite skill:

BAKING / COOKING / GOURMET COOKING

the size of your mods folder:

UM...5.60 GB I DON'T HAVE A PROBLEM! I See pretty cc I am like, “ I want to help this artist, by putting their hard work into my game.”

your 3 favourite mods:

MC command center / No EA eyelashes / All of Kawaii Stacies mods

your interests (other than sims):

Baking, Event Planning, Shopping (Inexpensively), Painting or drawing, Photography, Kdramas, 

your favourite sim (picture if possible): Briella Flores-Ponder, She is so much like me, it is kinda scary. (My favorite picture of Briella.)

which sims games you have played (including mobile games):

The Sims 2 on the Playstation 2 with my younger sister, Sims 3 (all of the expansion packs), MySims.

propose a crazy scheme:

Hm… I don't really know.

best part of simblr:

I like that everyone has a different writing style, and it is accepted. 

worst part of simblr: 

Honestly, I think the worst part of simblr is my way of thinking sometimes. If a post only gets one or two likes, I start to feel like… “oh, I guess that means people don’t like me as a person. If they don’t like my post I spent time on” I understand that it isn’t true. I know that I am liked.  But that is just a conflict that I have with myself. 

what other games you play: other websites or accounts (origin, twitter etc..):

Stardew Valley, City Skylines, Jackbox Games (with my family).

Twitter: https://twitter.com/Robbie_Birdie

Origin: RobbieBirdie

Tagging: @amuhav​, @whyhellosims​, @silverspringsimmer​, @katmk36​

[trashwarden]

Can't Forget You

Most recent fic commission from ticklishivories (twitter)! Do commission Kathy if you have a chance (:

Dorian Pavus x Vaxus Trevelyan | Modern AU | (2387 words) | AO3

---

 Vaxus stares out the window with a dent in his brow and confusion souring his smile. The back of his head throbs where sutures were left in his scalp and he wants to scratch the itch underneath the bandage strapped to his temple and shoulder, but otherwise, he’s fine. Just frustrated.

           “I’m sorry I had to do that,” Dorian says again, “but they wouldn’t have let me pick you up otherwise.”

           “It’s alright,” Vax says quietly. He doesn’t know why he’s so upset that Dorian had to lie. It makes sense; roommate that happens to be best friend isn’t a sufficient title to be let in on a traumatic accident. There’s a lot of things that add up– no one else could pick him up, his sister is out of town, so unless he wanted to spend another night in the hospital Dorian had no choice but to lie. And yet something about it leaves Vax with an off taste.

           “You’re being unusually silent.” Dorian looks over his shoulder before he makes a right turn. Vax’s gaze lingers a little too long on the muscles in his forearm. “The surgeon said your memories would most likely return. There’s no need to be worried.”

           Vax knows that something is off about this; he feels that he should be comforting Dorian, not the other way around.

           A ring goes off, shrill and buzzing. Vax jumps a bit– Dorian reaches into the center console and pulls out a phone.

           “Hello, Val.”

           Val.

           “Oh!” Vax reaches for the phone, and Dorian leans away. “Let me talk to her.”

           “Keep calm, Vaxus! You still have a concussion.” He sighs, rolling his eyes. “Yes, that was him. Clearly a collision with a speeding delivery truck wasn’t enough to knock his zest out.”

           Vaxus sits back and folds his arms across his chest.

           “He’s pouting now. No, there was no trouble. They accepted the lie rather easily, actually.” Dorian goes quiet, then clears his throat. “Well, that’s your opinion, and you’re entitled to it. Anyways, I think he’ll be fine to use technology after he rests. I’ll make sure he calls you first thing in the morning.” He smiles. “It’s my pleasure. Please, don’t thank me. Your brother…he’s worth it.”

           Vaxus peers over at him, the ache in his chest drawing him away from the ache in his head for a moment. It’s deep and familiar, as if it’s grown roots in his body.

           He remembers things fleetingly; he remembers driving away, and being upset. What about? Maybe something to do with the man sitting next to him, whose strong profile makes him stomach flip, whose small, sad smile makes his heart twist painfully. It’s not true, they’re not boyfriends. Not only that, it was a clever lie and made things easier for everyone.

           But why does it hurt so badly?

           Dorian leads the way to their apartment, even going so far as to open the door for him. Vaxus shoves his hands into the pockets, watching Dorian turn on the lights and set his hospital bag and medicines down on the kitchen table. Something about the action of Dorian removing his coat makes Vaxus’ eyes linger longer than they should his shoulders, so he pulls his gaze away to walk towards the end of the hall where he assumes his room is.

           “Vaxus? You’re heading into my room!”

           Vaxus feels like he’s hanging off the edge of a merry-go-round.

           “I’m gonna puke,” he says, sure that Dorian can’t hear him from across the apartment, but in the time that he blinks Dorian is there, miraculously materialized, his warm hand on his back as he guides him to the bathroom.

           “You just need some rest,” Dorian says softly, soothing Vaxus’ anxious chills. “Right as rain by the morrow.”

           “God, your words.”

           “Hm?” Insecurity creeps into Dorian’s voice. “What about them? I know I can sound a bit pretentious sometimes but I truly don’t intend it, you know how it is at my job working around such arrogant–”

           “No, no. I like them.”

           “My coworkers?”

           “No, your words.” Vaxus waves his hand in the air flippantly. “Your elegance is charming. And your shyness about it is cute.”

           “O-Oh. Well…”

           But Dorian has no quip for that, even though Vaxus waits for it, standing slumped in the dark hallway with his hand on his back while trying to breathe deeply and evenly. He has a feeling that what he said was daring, overstepping some sort of unspoken boundary, but he doesn’t care anymore. Whatever stupid justification he made for himself to not flirt with Dorian was completely wrecked with the rest of him in the car accident.

           And why the hell wouldn’t he flirt with this man? This sexy, easily embarrassed man who he’s lucky enough to have as a roommate and best friend?

           Dorian carefully removes his hand. He stands straight and backs away, pointing towards the restroom. “The washroom is here, incase you’d forgotten that.”

           Vaxus stares at him, dead-eyed.

           “Right. Holler if you need anything. I’ll be…cooking. Something.”

           “Cooking what?”

           “Like it matters! People who’ve been in car accidents shouldn’t be sassing so much!”

           He stomps off, and Vaxus can’t help but laugh, even if his head pounds.

Vaxus sleeps until late in the afternoon the next day. When he wakes, a glass of water with a slice of lemon is waiting for him on his nightstand. He gulps it down greedily, wipes at his mouth, and pushes himself out of the bed.

           He needs a shower, urgently.

           The hot water soothes his head. He touches his bandages and realizes they’ve been replaced; he peels them off, wondering if he asks sweetly if Dorian would replace them while he’s awake.

           The thought of Dorian’s hands on his head makes the little blood he has left shoot straight down. He groans, not having the energy to take care of it this time.

           …This time?

           A fragment slides into place– of many other showers, and many other times he’s told himself he can’t, shouldn’t, touch himself after thinking of Dorian.

           And all the times he did anyway, unable to look at Dorian afterwards.

           This is wrong. Dorian is gay, his best friend, and Vaxus is–

           Very obviously into him.

           But he’s basically lied to Dorian about himself. How many times has he had to tell some story about a girl he’s met at a made up bar, just to cover up all the hours he’s spent thinking about taking Dorian out for a drink?

           This is stupid. If he gets into another accident, he won’t have the chance to tell his best friend what he really thinks.

           “Dammit,” he curses under his breath, and wonders how long he can stand under the spray before he turns into a giant prune. Vaxus shakes his head until everything inside it is thoroughly rattled, then soaps and rinses himself off.

           Dorian is sitting on the couch reading when Vaxus emerges. When he looks up from his book, Vaxus has the pleasure of seeing a blush rise like a thermometer from his neck to his ears and all the way to the top of his head.

           Probably because the only thing maintaining his modesty is the towel clinging to his waist, but who knows?

           “Hey,” Vaxus says, unable to stop his smirk from growing. Dorian nods, visibly having to pull his eyes away from his wet abs and down to his book. Vax approaches him. “What are you reading?”

           “Just…a romance.” Dorian clears his throat. “Quite silly, but fun.”

           It’s strange that he doesn’t elaborate more; Dorian’s always loved gushing about new reading material. Vaxus decides to change the topic. “Um,” he continues, his heart beat quickening. “We need to talk about something.”

           “Hm?” Dorian doesn’t look away from his book. But his voice is higher pitched than usual, as if it were gliding atop a thinly frozen lake. “And what would that be?”

           Vaxus lets out a long breath. He braces himself. “Uh, I don’t remember much. Surrounding the accident.”

           Dorian goes still.

           “But I remember that I’ve been avoiding you.”

           He approaches the couch, sitting down slowly enough that Dorian has no choice but to look at him. Vaxus touches his knee, and Dorian’s eyes lock on it.

           “I haven’t been honest about something.”

           “No,” Dorian whispers. “No,” louder. “I don’t think you’re in the correct state of mind.”

           “I think the accident finally shook something straight inside my head.” Vaxus laughs at the accidental pun, but he can tell Dorian doesn’t find it funny at all. He’s leaning away, sinking back against the couch. Vaxus’ hand slides an inch up his thigh– barely any movement, but enormously significant. His heart thunders in his chest. “Dorian…”

           “Wait, hold on a moment–”

           “I was so disappointed when I found out we weren’t an item,” he continues, “and I had no idea why, but I do now.”

           “Vax…”

           “I really feel like this was meant to happen. Even though it was a lie, those few moments where I believed we were together…felt right.”

           Dorian is staring at him, wide-eyed, backing away. Vax’s heart sinks. It hits him what he’s doing; pushing his best friend down with his barely clothed body, literally trapping him against the couch. He retracts his hand, standing up as his cheeks flood with heat.

           “S…Sorry.” His hand won’t stop tingling, so he pushes it through his wet hair. “I’ll put some clothes on.”

           “Vaxus,” Dorian sighs. More than tired, he sounds…sad. Vaxus’ heart cracks as he looks at him. “Maybe you should rest some more. What you went through was traumatic. You wouldn’t…” He shakes his head slowly, as if resigned. “You wouldn’t be saying these things if you knew everything.”

           There are gaps in Vaxus’ memories. He doesn’t know what lead to the accident, or anything before Dorian picked him up from the hospital, but he does know that whatever stupid reason he was keeping his secret from Dorian never mattered to begin with.

           A tension lingers in the air throughout the day and into the evening. It’s familiar in a way that makes Vaxus feel cold all over, like a premonition. He changes his own bandages in the bathroom, hissing as he reveals the blackened stitches and bruises along his shoulders and arms. His eyes are red.

           He remembers something– Dorian’s red eyes, withholding tears, as he told Vaxus that he couldn’t live with him anymore.

           “Oh,” Vax says aloud. He clutches his chest as a wave of nausea rolls through him.

           His head pounds. Memories flood into him and he gasps as if drowning.

           The yelling. The tears. The begging– who’s begging?

           Stay. Don’t go.

           Dorian wanted to leave. He said he couldn’t take it anymore, but never said why. Vaxus had needled him to the point of shouting, until–

           He left the apartment–

           He’d been so hurt, so distracted–

           And then the accident.

           “Dammit,” he curses, holding his head as he leans over the sink.

           “Vax?” Dorian’s voice comes through the other side of the bathroom door. “Everything all right in there?”

           Vaxus takes a deep breath.

           “Yes,” he says. “I’m fine.”

           “The phrase ‘I’m fine’ has never been uttered in total honesty in history, Vaxus.”

           Actually, fine is an understatement; he hasn’t felt better than he’s felt in days. Maybe even weeks. “My stitches hurt, is all.”

           Dorian tsks, then opens the door, surprising Vaxus. He’s in his night clothes, smelling of mint, and Vaxus’ heart skips a beat.

           “Let me see.”

           Dorian takes up the bandages from the counter and grabs Vaxus’ arm, directing him to sit on the toilet as he takes his head in his hands and inspects the stitches. Vaxus feels himself flushing and keeps his eyes down, painfully aware that he’s shirtless.

           Dorian’s hands are warm and gentle. He delicately dabs a soaked cotton ball onto the wounds, his fingers sifting through his waves of hair and pushing the strands away. His eyes are focused, lips pursed in concentration, and Vaxus has a desperate need to kiss him.

           He’s in too deep. Can’t turn back.

           Can’t lie to himself about this anymore.

           “I’m sorry,” is the first thing that comes out of his mouth.

           Dorian doesn’t stop touching him. “For what?”

           “The fight.”

           Now, he slows.

           “You wanted to move out, and I acted so...childish.” He closes his eyes. “I made things harder for you.”

           Dorian’s palm holds the side of his head. “Yes, you did. But,” he sighs, “not for the reasons you think.”

           Vaxus looks up. Dorian is gazing at him, smiling, but his grey eyes shine with sadness.

           “You said things earlier today that I’ve only dreamed of hearing,” he whispers. “And that’s all I was sure they ever would be. I couldn’t…I couldn’t bear to live here anymore. Not with you.”

           Vaxus places his hand over Dorian’s.

           “I wanted to move on. Towards you, I’ve been…for so long–”

           Vaxus fills in the gaps. “I’m sorry,” he murmurs, heartbroken.

           “I don’t want to hear an apology from you.”

           “No, Dorian.” Vaxus leans up, bringing their foreheads together. “I’m sorry…for not telling you. For making you wait.”

           Dorian’s voice trembles. “The accident, your head– you’re not in the right state–”

           “I’ve never been clearer,” Vaxus says firmly, and waits until Dorian slides his eyes open and looks at him, before kissing his lips. Dorian gasps softly. “Believe me.”

           There’s so much hurt in Dorian’s gaze, so much hesitance in his touch. But there’s hope, too, and Vaxus pours into his kisses all the feelings he’d been withholding, the thoughts he’d been too afraid to think, and hopes that Dorian can trust him with all that he’s giving.

           Dorian’s sigh is more of a whimper. When both his hands come up to cradle Vaxus’ head, Vaxus pulls back.

           “Ouch,” he grimaces.

           “O-Oh! Did I touch something I–”

           “Yeah, just a bruise–”

           “I’m so sorry, let me finish bandaging this–”

           Dorian’s face is redder than a ripe tomato’s. Vaxus laughs, not caring about the pain in his head at all. He laughs and laughs, holding Dorian around his waist as he finishes wrapping the bandages.

           They’d talk more about it later. For now, he’s more than happy to just listen to Dorian’s fast, happy heart.

[inkedmyths]

Bamboozled again! Actually wait no this is the first time

Because I once again got going in the headcanon chat and had to write this out-

@linkeduniverse shenanigans ahead

Summary: So who were the first two to meet? Time and Warriors. How does that go? About how you would expect.

"Are you sure about this, hun?"

Link bit his lip as he looked into the worried eyes of his wife. Her brows were knitted together, and she searched his face with concern.

"You know I hate leaving. It's just... something's wrong." Very wrong. The hairs on the back of his neck stood up as he concentrated again. "I'm not sure what exactly, but I have to investigate. If it's a problem..."

"Ya have ta do somethin' about it, I know." Malon, bless her, smiled at him. It carried a sadness, but it was encouraging. "Always the Hero. Promise me you'll be careful, Link?"

"Of course darling." He leaned in for one last kiss. "If all goes well, I won't be gone for that long." If all doesn't go well, I may never come back, he thought. He pushed that nasty thought away, forcing a smile onto his face. He said his last goodbyes to his beloved before setting off down the road. She waved him goodbye, watching him go until he disappeared behind a hill.

It had been a long time since he'd gone travelling in full armor, much less this particular set. He carried all of his best gear, which may have been overkill, but he couldn't be too sure what he was dealing with. It could be nothing... but he doubted that. His instincts told him otherwise, carrying a feeling he hadn't felt in a long time. A feeling he hadn't felt since...

The masks felt heavy in his bag, despite them not weighing anything due to its magical properties. Memories he'd tried hard to forget resurfaced, and his hand drifted to the ocarina at his waist. Shaking his head, Link forced himself to focus on the present. Where was the disturbance coming from? He paused and focused for a moment. The woods to the left felt off.

He left the path, tromping through the underbrush. More memories swirled about his head of a distant and short childhood spent underneath the canopy of trees. Too short a childhood, really, but he brushed that aside. Birds twittered among the branches. Not too much could be wrong if they were still here-

A crash up ahead startled him out of his thoughts. His hand drifted up, ready to draw his sword if necessary. Swearing followed the noise, something which for some reason seemed to reverberate through him for a moment.

Well. Perhaps this was the answer to what he was looking for? He walked forward to investigate.

---

Link was having a bad day.

For one thing, he'd woken up with the worst hair day. It took him almost forty-five minutes to get his hair to lie properly, and even then one little piece was sticking up just wrong. By the time he got around to getting breakfast it was cold and they'd run out of bacon. He tripped over his own foot and nearly fallen down the stairs. Then someone spilled coffee on his scarf, which immediately had to go and wash before it stained.

To top it all off now, there was evidence of temporal issues happening again. No evidence to what was causing it. Just that something was happening. If it was Cia again, even though she should have been taken care of completely, he was going to scream.

Overall, a very bad day.

These were the thoughts that ran through Link's head as he stomped along his way.

He tried to calm himself down, if just a little bit. Breathe, in, out. "Get yourself together Link. You are the Hero of Warriors, Captain of the Royal Guard. You can handle all of this. That's why they sent you to investigate. "

He continued like that for a while, wrapped up in his thoughts and problems. If he'd been paying attention to his surroundings, he would have noticed he'd crossed into a forest where there shouldn't be one. He also would have noticed the sudden steep incline.

But he didn't, and yelped as his foot went down farther then he thought it would. This may have been just fine, but he then slipped on a patch of mud and fell. He rolled, crashing through the shrubbery down to the bottom of the hill.

He groaned, then followed that up with some rather nasty words. Pushing himself up, he spat a leaf out of his mouth. Now his hair was definitely messed up again, not to mention full of dirt and twigs.

Today was the absolute worst.

---

Choosing each step carefully, Link slowly inched into a small clearing ahead of him. What he saw was... not exactly what he was expecting.

It was a young Hylian man, whom it looked like had just fallen down a somewhat steep incline. He cycled through several observations about him: firstly, the brilliant blue scarf looped around his neck. Secondly, the fact that he was wearing armor. And third, the fact that he was swearing with the proficiency of someone who was well practiced with the art.

Aside from those observations, there was something about this man that felt... odd. Almost familiar, while also being foreign and strange. Who was he, and what was he doing here?

---

Link brushed off his tunic as he stood up. He muttered a few last insults directed at the very existence of the hill, before standing up straight. Then he heard the snap of a twig behind him, and he whirled around.

He wasn't sure exactly what to make of the man before him, except that he was obviously a warrior. His heavy armor gleamed in the sun that filtered through the trees. One blue eye studied him carefully, while the other was closed, a scar over it suggesting it was no longer functional. Strange tattoos marked his face in red and blue, giving him a fierce look. Not that he needed it. He was already an imposing figure.

Noting the huge sword on his back, Link let his hand drift towards his own. He shifted slightly, preparing to go into a battle stance if necessary.

---

The young man seemed as wary of him as Link was. He wasn't sure what that implied, but he figured he should try speaking before fighting. "Hello, stranger. What brings a young man such as yourself to this neck of the woods?"

The other Hylian blinked. "Business," he replied carefully.

That explained nothing, only raising more suspicions. "What sort of business?"

---

He wasn't attacking. Yet. Link didn't want to let himself be lulled into a false sense of security only to be attacked, so he stayed on guard.

"Royal guard business." That usually shut people up.

---

That was the first real weird thing. Link's eyes narrowed slightly. "Really? What does the guard want that's in a forest in the middle of nowhere?" As he said this, he reexamined the man. While he could tie some aspects of his outfit to the Guard, he didn't look like the soldiers he knew. An imposter? Or something more a little voice needled in the back of his head.

---

"Wait, forest? In the middle of nowhere?" For some reason it hadn't occurred to Link that he was in a forest until that moment. A forest which definitely shouldn't have been there. "Well shit. I guess this is the fucking anomaly."

---

Now that surprised him. The last thing Link had been expecting him to say. "Anomaly?"

The young man turned slightly red. "Shit, did I say that outloud?"

He ignored that comment. "Is that why you're here? Investigating the anomaly?" If that was the case...

---

Link blinked slightly. The man seemed to be taking this in stride. Was he the source of the problem.

"Well... yes." He watched him closely for his reaction.

"I am as well." The man scanned the surrounding area. "Perhaps I could help you."

That... wasn't what he was expecting. This man was investigating as well? He must be a local of this dimension, or point in time or... whatever. That explained his presence, at least somewhat.

"I mean, if you want," Link said, trying to play things cooly nonchalant. "What's your name?"

The man blinked once. "Link."

Oh fuck.

---

The scarfed Hylian turned pale, then groaned. "Oh my fucking god Hylia you can't be serious. This isn't happening. Not this shit again."

Link blinked. He had expected surprise, maybe awe. Not... whatever this soldier was doing.

"Fuck me, fuck this, and fuck these goddamn timelines and incarnations or whatever this shit is." The young man was moaning into his hands.

Hang on. Timelines?

"... I'm almost afraid to ask, but may I inquire as to the reason for your reaction?" He was met with a very familiar expression. It was the expression he'd seen in the mirror that morning when he'd sensed the disturbance. He braced himself for whatever he was about to hear.

---

He forced himself to take a deep breath. He can do this. This is fine. "Okay, please don't freak out or anything, but that's my name too. You're another Hero, right?"

The man, the other Link, had about the kind of reaction he was expecting. Shocked, he nodded, seemingly at a temporary loss for words.

"Alright. So, we are both," he gestured between them, "incarnations of Courage. From either different points in history, or from alternate Hyrules. For whatever goddess forsaken reason, something screwed up the timespace continuum, so now we are in the same place. You with me?"

---

He processed this for a moment. Another Hero of Courage? Okay, sure, why not? Would explain the odd familiarity if they sort of shared a spirit. "Alright. I think I've got it."

The other Hero looked surprised. "Really? Okay, okay, cool. Makes things a little easier."

He tipped his head to the side. "This has happened to you before?"

"Unfortunately yes. However the bitc- I mean, the person that caused it last time shouldn't be the cause this time, so I haven't the foggiest as to how it's happening now."

"Hm." He tapped his chin thoughtfully. "I'm not sure myself. I simply felt a disturbance in the continuum and set out to investigate."

"You sensed it?"

He nodded. "I suppose it's an ability that comes with being the Hero of Time."

The other Hero blinked, somewhat surprised. He seemed to get over it quickly, though. "Alright then, Time- can I call you that? It's far easier than saying 'Link', for obvious reasons."

"Fine by me. How about you, young one? What's your title?"

"Young one? What are you, my dad? Anyway, I'm the Hero of Warriors, so I guess that makes me Warriors. I can live with that."

Dad, huh? Well, he guessed he was getting to be that age. Or was he already that age? Didn't matter.

"So then, Time. You 'sense' any other disurbances?" Warriors looked at him expectantly.

He paused a moment, concentrating again. One ear twitched. "Not exactly, but my instincts are directing me that way." He gestured somewhere to the right.

"Alright. So I guess we head in that direction."

"We?"

"I mean, you said you were investigating the disturbances, right? And two Heroes are better than one.

Time chuckled. "I suppose you have a point."

"Of course I do. Now let's get going! The sooner we get this done the sooner I can take a shower." Warriors marched off.

Time chuckled once more. This Hero seemed rather brash, but he suspected he meant well overall. At least this meant neither of them would be fighting alone this round. He followed the scarfed blond into the trees.

And so the first two met and were on their way.

[nyrator]

mannnn

time for more nyrants and life updates with ny, focusing on mental healths and family and where to live and art stuffsss feat. very personal introspection about arttt

Trying to be in a better mindset when writing these compared to how I usually am, let’s seeee

Admittedly struggling with depression a lot lately. Like, to the point I just can’t get out of bed anymore. Tuesday I had the day off, and spent a total of about 16+ hours in bed. I think if not for Kresna, I’d probably spent the entire day in bed. Ate breakfast at like 4:30PM and ate dinner at around 11PM and felt sick from it. But it’s extremely, extremely hard to escape my bed. When I do, I just want to go back to bed, it’s a cruel temptation.

There’s a friend who reads these who always gives kind words and advice and just a heads up, you’re awesome friend. He’s suggested something to me to help and I’ve been really debating it for a while but I think I’m still too scared at the moment, and aaa I wish I was better at communicating directly with people but such is the life of a Ny (but really dude you are a good dude)

I should really see a therapist, I think, but it’s very difficult going anywhere without money or a car, so hm.

In terms of family life, my sister got of jail, was back in jail for three days, back out, basically living at the apartment, and got sent back to jail today for three months (allegedly she had the choice between eight months house arrest versus three months jail, she allegedly picked the latter- though my mother’s friend who keeps me up to date on information about my sister told me that she thinks her urine test was hot, so hmm). My sister being around was not good for my mind at all, I think, but hopefully she really is in jail for three months.

Work is still work, very slow, back to normal hours and keeping my usual $8/hr pay, which admittedly is a bit sad. But as much as they keep telling me they want to get rid of my coworker, my managers just don’t have the heart (something will blow up eventually, probably, but who knows when).

I think in terms of where I should go in life- Ideally wherever Kresna is, but you have no idea how hard immigration, especially on minimum wage. I’ve basically decided internally that, either the asian dude I like becomes president and I stay here (he’s still the only candidate to give me some kind of hope, as silly as politics in general is), otherwise I move wherever Kresna is. But man, it’s so hard, and I’m scared of how hard it will be to support each other honestly (he’s very supportive but I’m very much a leech)

In other news, I’ve also started keeping a dream diary finally. For January, I have about four-five dreams so far. None of them I’m sure are real dreams, or just my imagination running wild in the mornings after waking up but before getting out of bed. I think I mentioned before having a type of reoccurring humiliation dream, and ended up having two of them this month (one came dangerously close to being really bad before I woke myself up).

Now, in terms of creativity (aka one of the main reasons I wanted to type today)

Art

is hard

Rotten Nyan is a strange project, as I’ve mentioned a few times before. I think I want to distance myself from it- like, project these characters as a separate entity from myself. But they’re basically a caricature of my life, so it’s weird. Doing the latest update made me feel really satisfied with myself, doing five pages in such a quick and effortless amount of time.

And then I posted them, and it was like daggers into my chest afterwards. Like, feelings of self conscious, guilt, self hate, all riled up at the realization I keep making these things public, and just really blending me up inside. It’s such a weird thing- really loving these characters and drawing them, but feeling sick thinking of any ideas or sharing anything about them when I do. And the guilt of association- these characters are technically me, but I’d rather people not see them as me, I think, and I try to think of them as separate entities- but it’s obvious they’re me.

Ideas are very hard for me to come by for that reason- the pain, and not wanting to think back on my life anymore. I think I use art to socialize, in a way- give people something interesting, something they can like and admire, and when someone interacts with it in some way- it’s like a wave of euphoria, or something. And it’s funny, because it’s still a similar reaction from me- I get so happy and flustered that I become so anxious with it and want to hurt myself. It’s a good feeling (and trust me I’ve moved on from hurting myself long ago), but anxiety is weird I guess.

I mention it a lot, but I just love the idea of other people feeding me ideas- I feel like I want to make things for other people, but the things I want to make are just my own ideas, not necessarily what they want, you know? And I’d like to join more communities and try to just get that social aspect more. Been trying to be more active on twitter, but boy do feelings of self consciousness hurt.

In terms of what I want to make, it’s also very tricky. I don’t have many original ideas lately. I browse pinterest, read manga when I can, but it’s tough. I decided to catch up on that Suicide Boy manhwa (stopped when they skipped like four chapters but figured ehh what the heck I’ll read the newer ones anyway), and mannn, my body can’t stand it. That movie theater chapter especially stood out, it’s like a frozen sledgehammer into my gut and ribcage, that kind of suffering. It feels like it hurts more than usual, and I’m both excited and scared for when Kabi’s new manga comes out into English. I don’t know how my current self can handle it.

I’ve been thinking of biting the bullet and going to the darker parts of the internet for my art. It’s tricky to talk about, y’know? But seeing most people I know fragrantly post what they like, it’s like, is there really any big deal if I do? But it’s weird. It’s like I have a mental image that I don’t want to be associated with. Explicit and highly sexualized things- those things still make me uncomfortable as a person and I still have no interest in them at all, but other things, hm. I don’t think I’d be able to handle gore, for example- I’m surprisingly squeamish, and have become moreso as time goes on, despite the edgy stylized subject matter I like.

In terms of my own personal dark interests, it’s also weird. I’d consider myself a very chaste person, but the one interest I do have is also a form of self harm, in a way, and it’s something I know most people want or like to see. It’s also something I think about far too often and pay attention far too closely in things I see- something about the way that specific pain resonates with me, it’s something that gives me the deepest chills and feelings of disgust. Such a weird mix of emotional pleasure and pain, I guess. It’s something I want to make works about, but I worry about which part I’m writing for- the pleasure, or the pain. And I forgot (or blocked out) how much it affected my mind as a kid, the painful part anyway, before it got warped into something else in high school.

Anyway, I don’t know if I’d ever be able to draw things like that comfortably. I think I just want a sense of community, or something, but those kinds of communities seem dangerous. And it’s weird, I think of friends’ interests and hidden art I’ve stumbled upon, hidden identities but with a trademark style, and how I just think good for them, keep it up, make what you want. Yet when it comes to myself, I don’t think I could just do that- make a different identity and post what amounts to fetish art. One, because I love my OCs and don’t like degrading them to just being fetish characters (and can’t imagine drawing many other characters or just designing designated fetish characters without other purpose), and two, because I simply just don’t feel comfortable with myself about it, I guess

I think, ultimately, I’m just scared of being judged, but still just want to make this weird content, but want to make it for a broad audience, if that makes sense. Either way, I don’t think I’ll ever be comfortable with it, and I’ll probably make a chapter of RN focus on what it at least means to me one day to at least get things off my chest. I just worry how hard my psyche will be damaged after submitting it to the public, if just sharing a tiny bit in RN has caused me so much turmoil already.

but yeah, in short: I want to draw Nyans, my mind keeps remembering the majority of things that happened to middle lave were very disgusting and so I feel uncomfortable drawing them, but those are the only things I can think of drawing half the time when thinking of ideas for them and feeling “wow, that’s really bad, I could and should do better”

and nowwww to get ready for work