#i shoulda written this when i had more sense in me noggin

[regrettablewritings]

Writer’s Tag

Rules: Answer all 21 questions, let the one who tagged you know you answered and then tag your writing pals!

I was tagged by:  @locke-writes. What beast hath you released upon these fields?

The Works:

1. Which is the imagine you’re most proud of?

Hmmm...Not a whole lot because it takes me a while to actually be content with the things I’ve written. At this point, however, I’m most pleased with Stripulation because it was my first Barba fic and done while also writing a long-ass essay on Titus Andronicus. Plus, I managed to speak to @ohbelieveyoume in the first place because I bombarded her with my thoughts on how Barba’s secret could’ve been that he was a stripper. I also think that how it was written sets the tone for my general style of writing: Dramatic, humorous, and just plain weird in some cases. HC set-wise, definitely the Kidnapped HCs. I’m rather proud of how they turned out almost like a regular, paragraphical story and I finally got to use some of the angst I disturbingly like to read about when reading rescue stories. ...Ignore that.  Plus, that sucker is 9 pages in Word!

2. Which is your least favourite?

Blargh, what isn’t my least favorite? . . . Okay but yeah, I’ve honestly never been too fond of The One Reason to Love the Glasshouse. I wrote it right before I blew a mental gasket and couldn’t be pleased with anything I wrote, and I think it shows. The writing feels so lifeless and boring . . . HC set-wise, the NSFW Digger Harkness piece, which is a shame because I love Capt. Boomerang. I think I was just in an off headspace at the time of writing it and also wasn’t sure what to do when it came to writing Digger’s accent.

3. If you were to recommend one to read to your mum/mom?

My mom knows I have a blog where I write, but I could never tell her who or what i wrote about. Besides, she’s wicked good at editing and would spot every single mistake I’ve made and I can barely handle the feeling of a classmate reading over my mistakes, much less my own mother. But if I had to -- gun to my head -- it’d probably be How to Be a Good Catholic. She herself is Catholic and would likely widen her eyes at the crap I wrote ( “We don’t do that anymore, crazy girl!!”). I would, of course, be hiding as she reads it.

4. Which one would you consider re-writing?

God, so many if I actually had the drive. I particularly am not entirely fond of how I ended The Hairy Situation; I know I wanted to go a different route with it, but I can’t remember what I initially had planned. I also probably should’ve divided up Day Bi Day: A Documented Study of the Bisexual because that bastard is way too long to hold general attention. I want to add more to the Dating Finn Would Include but may as well just make a second part to it when I had the time. Might rewrite or at least gussy up the NSFW Digger Harkness HCs though. I also wish I could rewrite the ending of  How to Be a Good Catholic. because I have a bad habit of never knowing how to finish a story until it’s already been posted and gained attention.

5. Biggest regret in an imagine?

Writing The One Reason to Love the Glasshouse. It was just so sloppy and I guess I just wanted to write it to force creativity out of me. It fell unceremoniously into a grotto in my opinion. Also, I wish I could remember how to write simpler. You can tell which imagines were from when I was first starting out because they’re shorter than my more recent stuff (with the exception of A Practice in Happy Memories). The reason why is because most of them were written on my phone

6. Biggest success with an imagine?

Writing Day Bi Day to play out somewhat like a documentary was a bit of a nightmare because documentaries are such an audible and visual thing, even with storytelling regarded. But I fucking did it (I think)! I’m also really proud with how the Kidnapping HCs came out, too. I was originally going to keep it short and simple and start with the reader already being kidnapped with very little interaction between Bruce and the kidnappers but it kept flowing out until I decided to give it a beginning, middle, and end

7. Your imagine with the most notes?

M’kay so it took some time (had to go through each one of these blasted things and record their note counts), but I’ve finally come back with the numbers. In terms of an actual imagine in typical fanfiction format, my most popular piece is . . . the Jonathan Byers Soulmate AU. I also looked at my headcanons as well! The most popular one for that format was . . . the . . . Dating Jonathan Byers Would Include. . . .  *sighs heavily and takes a swig from Dr. Pepper bottle* Y’know, I miss when Bruce was my money-maker. And I’m not ashamed to admit it.

8. Your imagine with the least notes?

. . . *skims through shit again* Uhhhh . . . HC-wise, I think my NSFW Digger?? I know there’s much lower but they belong to the basic HC memes. Traditional format-wise, The Hairy Situation.

9. What do you think makes a good imagine? Tips?

I. . . don’t really know. Honestly, I wing most of my stuff. The only thing I can say is write what you want to see with the notion that it’s not already there.

10. When’s the next update on your works?

Aside from the NSFW Frank Castle meme that’s been sitting in the cellar of my inbox since November, the only thing I got is the prize for my giveaway winner. Otherwise, unless somebody donates or whatever, I don’t plan on writing until I got my shit in order.

11. Number of followers before you started writing and after? I made this blog for the purpose of dumping my crap here instead of dumping it on others via their submissions box. So 0. At the time of this post, it’s 1,264. I don’t understand how it got this bad.

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The Writer:

1. Which character do you love writing for?

The character who I keep winding up writing for is Barba. Since SVU left his personal life wide-fucking open (fucking assturds),there’s plenty to work with. I particularly seem to take sadistic joy in putting him in blush-worthy situations that force him to be more open with his significant other.

2. Which character do you dislike writing for?

There are, but I’ve never had to write for them to begin with.

3. What’s your favourite AU to write for?

Soulmate AUs are generally the only ones I’ve written for consistently.

4. What’s your least favourite AU to write for?

Haven’t written for any AUs other than a buncha soulmate AUs and one mobster AU.

5. What do you hope never gets requested?

Anything rape-y or morally disturbing.

6. What do you wish was requested more?

Hmmm... Well, I don’t really take requests until I’m doing memes to be honest. I can’t trust myself to handle actual requests for a bunch of reasons, though for some reason people only ever request things after I’ve finished asking them for their opinions on things to post.

7. Thoughts on writing Smut/POC/Curvy/MxM/FxF?

H’oh boy. So I’m gonna divide these up by least wordy to most:

1. FxF: I’m okay with it because my sexuality makes it easier for me to put on that mindset. 2. Smut: I can write headcanons, but not full-blown imagines. As a virgin who’s already got some weird situation going on with sex, I know I’m not capable of filling out two to three pages worth of intercourse of any kind. 3. POC: I’m most familiar with writing with a black reader in mind, given that I myself am black. I can try to write for other ethnicities, but admittedly will likely walk on eggshells about it. The thing is, you can’t always or even often write with a POC reader in mind and just leave it at that. While there may be some overlap in circumstances between some groups, each ethnicity has its own stereotypes and situations to confront and conquer in a given situation such as a relationship. Therefore, if I write with a non-black reader in mind, I would still need to ask a person from the group I’m intending to write about just to assure I do right by them. But still gonna be met with extreme hesitancy because that’s not an intersectionality I’m familiar with. 4. MxM: Okay so . . . I can’t do this. I was just explaining to a friend the other day and you can be disappointed in me all you want, but I can’t knowingly write MxM for a couple of reasons. I can try to write gender-neutral (if I remember to), but writing MxM is . . . Okay, just hear me out: I know it may seem like a copout, but I genuinely don’t feel comfortable writing for something I don’t quite understand. Now before you go yelling at me about how I don’t understand a lot of the shit I do write for, let me explain. I am not male. I have never been male. And at this point, I highly doubt I will ever identify as male. I cannot pull or properly fathom the experience of being a queer male, cis or trans. I cannot provide for it the depth I feel that it requires. I know that may seem like a lame excuse, but I mean it. I can write FxF a little better because my sexuality allows for me to comprehend attraction to another female and how it could potentially play out. I cannot draw inspiration or direction from reading MxM fics, either, because I don’t read them. It’s just not my bag. On top of this, a lot of MxM media, both fiction-wise and published story-wise, appear to be written by girls. And while many of them are skilled, I’m sure, my issue is that I can’t in confidence trust them to be entirely spot-on with their interpretations, either. Many interpretations of queer male relationships (at least in Western media) that females initially and even predominantly gain familiarity with come with roots in fethisization and an often occurring desire to see not two consenting males who are emotionally compatible come together, but instead a desire to see two of the most attractive (and often white/white-passing) males come together regardless of how healthy their relationship would realistically be or how much of a foundation it actually has to stand upon. I’m sorry if you’re disappointed, but I had to be honest. I don’t like lying. I just feel that it’s not my place to theorize the happenings of a real lifestyle that comes with struggles I would not and could not be familiar with or feel comfortable winging at. Just like with writing with a POC reader in mind, there are just some struggles that don’t blanket everybody no matter how much you wish it could because it’d just be simpler for you. Everything that isn’t cis, white, straight, and male (aka intersectional) has a struggle that not everyone is going to be able to comprehend with utmost perfection.

8. Which account is your biggest inspiration in writing?

Hmmm... I try to be dramatic and poetic like @ohbelieveyoume, or sensual like @xemopeachx, or nice and homey like @mrsrafaelbarba, or cute and with lovely references and diction like @jonedwardbernthal. I would like to be more broad with my fandoms like @locke-writes, too. Buuuttt . . . I guess what I got going for me now is a’ight. I pride myself off of using my weird sense of humor in my writing anyway.

9. How long have you been an imagine writer for?

One year.

10. Any upcoming secret works? 🤔

Ha! Nope. Just the two things whenever they get done and then that’ll be it unless something happens.