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h3l10tr0p3 · 6 years ago

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Headcanon: Deku, the Serial Shipper

Contains- Mentions of sexual activities, established relationship - Bakudeku; Crack pairings- TodoIna, JiroMomo, UraTsuyu, UraTenya, DenkiSero, Kirimina, platonic Kiribaku etc.

(Beware- Long post)

Jesus Christ, I just had this HC and now I gotta spill, otherwise I won't be able to sleep tonight. Here's another annoying Long Post for y'all)

Deku, as a Pro Hero and Katsuki's Duo Partner, has a pretty hectic life since the media are crazy bloodhounds, the villains are a pain in the ass, interacting with fans becomes exhausting at times, and the critics are demons wailing for his blood.

Yeah, very hectic. And on top of that, there's very little time to relax. Most of the days he sneaks some solace in the gym, if he can buy more time he likes to read and immerse himself in his notebooks and research. Fighting Katsuki to blow some steam is a last resort to shed off weeks of frustration and only reserved for off-days or desperate times - because something like that inevitably devolves into gratuitous rough sex or worse, day-long fuck-a-thon. Not that Deku doesn't enjoy it, he simply doesn't have the time to indulge and he knows Kacchan doesn't either, so they try to keep their hands off each other unless the occassion begs for much-needed violent release.

But sometimes, you just want instant relief. Sometimes Deku just wants to kick back and relax like a normal person, go on the internet, without everyone hounding him for a piece of his mind.

So he does.

Under Anonymity.

Et viola @allmight9000 comes alive on several media platforms including Tumblr and Twitter. At first, Deku masquerades around as a hardcore All Might fan fighting anyone who dares to diss the retired Symbol of Peace . But since his retirement, his popularity has gone cold, not many heated debates take place around him anymore and as sad as this makes Deku, he decides to discover new venues.

Now, Deku knows there's this dark void of fanfiction lurking on the net and there's no escape from it should he ever set foot into it. He is also aware of the dark things that beckon him from the sewers like Pennywise the Dancing Clown (eg. All Might/Endeavour, Hawks/Endeavour, All Might Bowl, All Might/ Hero Harem, All Might/Midnight, All Might/Aizawa/Present Mic and so on), things he should rightfully keep a safe distance from. But this is fucking Deku we are talking about- ofcourse he dares to dip his foot into the murk of fanfiction.

For science, he thinks, and takes the plunge.

It all goes downhill from there.

One day, Katsuki comes back from his shift to find Deku face-planted into the sofa, he hasn't eaten lunch, hasn't bathed and is claiming trauma, repeatedly insisting that he has sinned and he is going to hell for it, then he shakily holds up a 367k word fic of Villain Might/Endeavour. Katsuki has to slap him back to his senses. Later that night, Deku calls up Toshinori and asks him for forgiveness, when Toshinori asks him worriedly, 'For what?', Deku assures him he DOES NOT wanna know.

After obsessively going through various tropes and completing every Enemies to Lovers / Mutual Pining / Unrequited Love fic there is (and there is a lot, Deku hates himself every day for it), waiting torturous weeks for dead authors to rise from the ashes for a teeny tiny update, Deku finally gives up his small lake of unfulfilling All Might ships (because frankly it's hard to find a fic that suits his tastes and convincingly fleshes out a love story around a man who has pointedly avoided romance for the better part of his LIFE or a find a fic which is COMPLETE) and sets out into the sea of Ships.

Bad Idea.

Very VERY Bad Idea.

(We know it, he knows it. Katsuki is the only one who is blessedly oblivious because he chooses not to wade into Deku's mental shit and compromise his own sanity.)

Strangely, Deku has come to take an odd satisfaction of returning to fan mentality of shipping two people without restraints (rarely more than two)-it's simple, senseless, easy. It gives his head a break from all the overanalyzing it does and gives him a small dose of endorphins when he cant work out, eat out or fuck out the frustration. He was adverse to it first, since these are strangers trying to ship two random people (people he is friends with), and it was unsettling to find so many people shipping them when they've BARELY had any interaction in canon real life! What's the premise of shipping them at all? He just didn't find any allure to it back then. So he kept his reads under fluff and under mature ratings because he feels uncomfortable reading smut about his friends.

But Deku had a 'Oh my God they were ROOMMATES' moment when Jirou and Momo announce that they are dating to the U.A. Alumni, that too after reading a really fluffy Creati/Earphone Jack fic which accurately referenced their public sightings together and spun it into plot-points quite masterfully. ( the author did a real good job on it) And the most horrifying thing about the fic, Deku finds, is the fact that NO ONE, not even the AUTHOR knows how correct they were in their estimates! No one except Deku.

That realization shakes the foundations of Deku's beliefs and morality as he wonders how many fics out there , sfw or smut, requited or unrequited love, enemies to lovers or lovers to strangers, fluff or smut have come so so close to the truth, been so damn close - like an alternate course of their love-story? and WHY IS NO ONE GIVING IT MORE KUDOS?

This is how Deku ends up being the most irredeemable Shipper of the universe- with a mission in hand:

To curate proof of all valid ships and to supply aforesaid proof of it to the world (as subtly as he can of course, so as to not compromise his own identity or the privacy of the Shipped.)

He begins to scour through the net for paparazzi photos, indulges in gossip, pries out information of who is dating whom from his Hero contacts, authenticates it, creates folders and subfolders of photographic 'proof' (they are just teasers really) and whenever anyone writes a fic that comes anywhere close to the real thing he makes sure to tag them in his tumblr/twitter post with photos which basically pour gasoline over their fiery passion to continue dreaming and writing fics around those Ships. Like:

You wrote a fic of Fluffy Iron Fist x Real Steel? Here you go- an obscure pic of them leaving her apartment together

Uravity x Ingenium and Uravity x Froppy? A love triangle that could possibly end in heartbreak?!! Damn, sistah, who knows? (She's confused too, imho) So here you go- Uravity getting tipsy with Froppy and Uravity snuggling to Ingenium under the rain.

One-shot of Chargebolt x Cellophane getting frisky in an alley? Honey, I gotchu. Here's a pic of them arriving at a villain scene together with dishevelled clothes.

All Might x Endeavour Slow Burn? My dear friend- here's a picture of the Symbol of peace roasting marshmallows with Shouto on flaming Endeavour merch. Please don't make me block you.

All Might x Midnight? Here's a pic of my mom, me and my Dad AllMight. Midnight, Who binch?

Celsius (Shouto) x Gale Force Stripper AU? Oh, hey, look I'm totally that one lucky guy who was in the right place at the right time, okay? I dont know these guys personally, OKAY? Not. At. All. But I have some Opinions™ about your fic? and pics to support it. Just wanna show you that maybe...i mean...MAAYYYYYYBEEEE...the stripper is Galeforce, not Celsius? Yeah? Don't worry though, You're doing good. Love the slow build, keep up the good work!

Deku becomes a sensational fic-writer-enabler and often gives inspiration to writers who are looking to write for a new fandom. Deku's got their backs.

He sinks so deep into this Shipping business that one day Katsuki catches wind of it. It was becoming painful to keep ignoring Deku's descent into madness. Katsuki was okay with it as long as the nerd did his job well and fucked him even better (which Katsuki will never admit to enjoying, even at gun point. Pull the trigger, you coward). So, yeah, Katsuki could have accepted all of Deku's weird stalkerish behaviours (even if they weren't fixated on him all the time anymore and the 'Kacchan, sugoi!' comments had plummeted drastically....who needs the shitnerd to validate his worth, right?! Right...it didn't make him pissed AT ALL. because admitting that would mean he enjoyed it, WHICH HE DID NOT, MIND YOU)

What Katsuki couldn't accept was Deku accidentally using his official Hero twitter handle to post a very platonic (but in the eyes of rabid fans- borderline homoerotic) pictures of him and Eijirou and posted it as #Ground_Riot. The fucking flood of Zeku-haters and pro-GroundRioters had the comments section on FIRE. The post goes VIRAL.

Deku, fucking DEKU, the man who is secretly ENGAGED to him, is promoting GroundRiot like NO ONE's business and HE DOESN'T EVEN KNOW WHAT HE DID WRONG.

Katsuki finds Deku happily puttering around their shared apartment completely oblivious to the PR hell that has been licking at his heels. He immediately attacks Deku's account and is completely gobsmacked. Lo and fucking behold- every fifth picture in his blog is fucking GROUND RIOT.

Not just that, apparently, THIS MAN, his fucking FIANCE, is not only a renowned peacemaker in inane Ship wars, but is hailed as a Soothsayer of Ships for always correctly prophecizing "Ships that will Sail into the fucking Sunset', he is basically some minor god in the Hero fandom who is extorting excitement out of fic writers and fans alike so that 'the crime of incomplete fics' can be eradicated once and for all. And Deku's fucking commited to it.

(perhaps more commited to Ground Riot than his own betrothal because there isn't A SINGLE POST of ZEKU on his blog)

There's even a post where he answers an ask from anonymous. The question: "Are you also anti-Zeku? I have never seen you post anything related to that ship. Is it because you think it won't Sail?" And Deku answers shortly how he isn't explicitly Anti-Zeku, but doesn't like the idea of reading fanfics of that ship. He clearly witholds his opinion if the ship will sail or not. Katsuki also finds the chat which started all this shit.

Chat-

Hey! @allmight9000. I wanted to write a GroundRiot fic? Could you give me some inspiration?

Aww, sure! It's my favourite Ship tbh. I love GroundRiot. I have a whole gigabyte of inspirations in my laptop. I'll send you some when I get back home, okay?

Yup!!! I am actually a hardcore Zeku fan. But recently my friends got me into Ground Riot and I am addicted!! But Zeku will always have a special place in my heart <3

I see. :)

Do you wanna try it out? I know you mentioned you don't like it. But I know some REALLY good fics.

No thank you ^_^ I make it a point to not read those fics. I just can't visualize it working, you know?

Oh...np. Each to their own. But I really hope one day you try reading some if you can?

I don't think so ...😅...uh...but..Any preferences for your inspiration though? or genre youre interested in?

Fluffff!!

Haha, okay! Look out for the new post on my twitter!

YASSS!! Love ya!

You too!

Katsuki sees red, he's about to flip his shit when he decides to give Deku one LAST fucking chance to explain WHY THE FUCK is he promoting Ground Riot when he should be shipping Zeku and demands of him if he really wants their Fucking Ship To Sail Or Not.

Deku gets defensive and says of course he does. Katsuki asks why he has been trying to push him onto Eijirou all this time if he wasnt serious about it. Deku doesnt want to answer. Then Katsuki gets fruatrated and asks WHY the fuck didnt he post Zeku.

"Because I don't want to support it"

"We are literally fucking engaged, you moron. What the FUCK do you mean you don't support it?!"

"I support Us, Kacchan! I just don't wanna support Zeku-shippers! Those two things are different!"

"WHy dont you wanna support them?! tHere is No Difference!"

"There is! I am not obligated to do anything for you. But if I admit to shipping Zeku out loud to the shippers, then I'm obligated to post pictures of us and I know that if I start posting that then my blog will literally be a flood of just Us all over!!"

"What is WRONG with that?!!"

"WE ARE SUPPOSED TO BE ENGAGED IN SECRET! NO ONE IS SUPPOSED TO KNOW! you said it yourself! That you don't like the useless yapping of reporters about your love-life where it isn't their business!"

"YEAH? WELL FUCK THAT!"

And Katsuki whips out his phone, takes a selfie of french kissing the hell out of Deku and immediately posts in on his twitter. Deku has hardly reeled back from that intense kiss when he realizes what Katsuki has done and he practically explodes in shame.

"Kacchan!! Our secret!"

"Your fucking fault, Deku. If I have to deal with the shitty extras at all, it better be for the right Ship, you dumbass. I'll punt you straight to China if I hear Ground Riot from your mouth ever again...capiche?"

"But I like Ground Riot...It's a valid ship, Kacchan. You cant diss on it just like that. It has wonderful scope, and the fluff in this ship is AMAZING. I think I have a soft spot for Uke!GZ and Soft!GZ now... and it is a really mutually productive ship unlike- hrmff!", Katsuki shuts him up with a smack to his mouth and sheds his shirt.

"Shut your mouth and strip, shitnerd. I'll fuck the Ground Riot out of you. Also, let's make this fucking clear that if you mention ANYTHING that goes anywhere near Eijirou's dick,ass, balls or mouth", Katsuki shivers, "then I'll wreck your dick, ass, balls and mouth. Remember that. Now STRIP"

"But what about platonically? That's a solid ship, right? Right, Kacchan? Also It doesn't mention Eijirou's- fuck!!!"

Deku gets wrecked thoroughly.

(Let's observe one moment of silence for his Shipping ass 🙏)

(r.i.p. Deku)

Katsuki later asks him why Deku doesn't read Zeku fics either, cause pretending to not like it to weasel out of obligation is fine, but it doesn't explain why he refuses fo read any either.

"A fic, especially the ones that I like, always are these perfect little stories which always have a happy ending. Can't help it, I'm weak to it, Kacchan- it's why I read fics at all, you know? For the rush of happiness and feels! It's always written with the intention that it will be perfect! And it is. But it doesn't come close to the real thing. There can be fics out there that come really close to what we really have though - but I refuse to accept that any fic could be better than the imperfectly perfect things I have with you, Kacchan. No matter what anyone insists, what I have with you is perfect to me. You are perfect to me. And that's all that matters."

Katsuki calls him an incorrigible sap and turns away to hide a violent flush that turns him red like a stop sign.

Omake:

Katsuki's #Zeku goes Viral too. But at this point no one understands what is going on or WHY. Because GZ appears to be a Zeku shipper when Deku is a GroundRiot shipper. Confusion abounds. Zac Efron memes agonize over Both ships, Captain America Japan Civil War Memes make a comeback. And for some reason, Deku keeps posting Ground Riot afterwards too and everytime he does, the next day he is seen limping.

"Did you have a hardtime with Zero-san at training yesterday?"

Before Deku can answer the one who asks him that, Eijirou comes up, winks and answers in his stead, "Very hard", and runs away to Mina's side before Deku has a shame-filled meltdown.

(The Ground Riot thing stops only when Mina and Eijirou get finally married.)

#bakudeku #katsudeku #katsuki x izuku #ktdk #bkdk #deku the shipper #humour #social media shenanigans #headcanon #fic idea #fanfic idea #too many headcanons #holy crap this was such a shit hc #deku ships kiribaku

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duelingdestiny · 8 years ago

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☠ ♥ ♦ ♢ ✮☄ ☯ ☀ ☁ ☂ ☢ ☣ ❀ ✧❥ ❦ ❧ ✖ ♒❣

☠ What does someone have to do for an instant unfollow from you?

Start public shit on my dash. I literally cannot handle it. I don’t want to be involved. I don’t want to see it. I’ve been a part of it before. I’ve screwed up and started it myself before, and at this time in my life I’m avoiding it like the plague.

♥What's the WORST thing that has happened to you rp wise?

Oh my god. Uhhhhh. Wow so okay the thing I actually regret rp wise is losing one of my favorite partners due to something really stupid that could have been handled WAY better on both sides but it’s really helped me to handle things better as a person. Still, I regret losing that person as an RP partner, and I probably always will.

♦ What was a mildly annoying thing that has happened to you rp wise?

I mean the really big thing that messes with me is because of character bleed. When people just leave Atem. It really messes him up. Or when any relationship he’s in just ends. It’s like he has no closure and it messes with me to have to deal with his pining ass.

♢ Has anyone ever tried to steal your blog? Your headcanons? Icons? All that jazz

In short Yes. I’ve been around possibly the longest at the point and I’ve seen a lot of my hcs migrate to other Yami/Atem blogs, but it doesn’t bother me. I’m flattered, besides most of them aren’t so far fetched that people couldn’t come up with them on their own. I will however flip shit over my icons Masaya90 made them for me as a commission and I will absolutely fight someone over them, but you know how I feel about stolen art anyways

✮ Have you managed to stay away from drama?

AHAHAHAHAHAHA. I’m sorry give me a moment. Honestly yes. Other than the drama I have caused for myself in the past? All and all I am very careful about who I interact with. I just don’t deal with it. I ignore the “discourse” and just do what I’m here to do. That’s all I can do.

☄ Have you ever been in the middle of drama?

Yes. I have been in the middle. And I’ve handled being in the middle badly, and I’ve tried my best to rectify my mistakes which is all anyone can do. I’ve made amends to the people I feel like I needed to make amends to and as a general rule I just ignore drama altogether now.

☯ Have you ever tried to bring peace to a situation?

I have. Sometimes I succeed, others I have failed miserably. I’ll tell you this. I will generally always try to bring peace to things. I don’t like being at odds with anyone. It’s too much work and I’m too lazy to hold a grudge.

☀ What's your rp pet peeve?

Oh this is a tie, between people just putting Atem in a situation he would NEVER be in, in a starter (without discussing it with me prior) or people who don’t cut their posts and use mobile as an excuse. I am on mobile some times and I just make a new post and mention my rp partner in it so we don’t clog the dash. It’s not rocket surgery.

☁ Have you ever forgiven a partner when you shouldn't have?

I don’t think so mainly because if two people can work through something I think they should. I used to not think that but I’ve learned a lot and some times people just fuck up you know? So no. I don’t think I’ve ever forgiven someone when I shouldn’t have because everyone deserves another chance.

☂ Have you ever been forgiven when you knew you shouldn't have been?

Again, see post above

☢ What fads/trends are you so over?

CONTAINER BLOGS!!!!!!!!! Seriously, I have fucking unfollowed people for this shit. I understand that you want your blog to be pretty, but holy shit. Just font that’s a size 7 and I have to blow up the page like 9 times in order to read anything and most of them have the practically non existent scroll bar and AUTO PLAY fucking terrifies me. Like just please know every time I have to go on your blog and music starts out of no where you are giving me a HEART ATTACK. Just I know you think it looks pretty but before you decide on the things like that go on your blog and look at it. USE it. User friendly is a REALLY important thing guys.

☣ Have you ever rp'd with someone you knew for a fact was abusive but tried to give them a chance/to make up your own opinion on the roleplayer? Did they change or did you understand what people were talking about?

Due to past personal experiences I like to make up my own mind about people. Honestly the best relationship came from that. Making up my own mind. A lot of really good friendships have come from that so yes, I always try to give people a chance no matter what I’ve heard, because what you hear is probably only half of the truth to being with.

❀ What has made you completely lose your chill?

People being shitty to others on the dash publicly. And yes before anyone points a finger, I have been in on that once and it was an awful stupid idea. It doesn’t help anything. It literally doesn’t. Tearing someone up in public makes you look like a giant asshole. We have Inboxes and IM systems and a plethora of other social media so if you have an issue with someone you can talk to them like they are a person and explain your grievance and if it’s THAT big of a deal just unfollow them and block them if you need to, but there’s no reason to be Captain Asshole on the dash. No one really wants to see it and it makes everyone’s experience really uncomfortable so bottom line? Just don’t call people out publicly.

✧ Do you agree with reblog karma or is it forced interaction?

I’m up in the air with this. I have WAY too many followers and it’s extremely frustrating to reblog a meme get 30 reblogs off said meme and get literally not one thing in my inbox from said meme. But I remind myself timezones, and maybe people don’t feel like that will work for our muses but here’s the really easy thing that you can do if that’s the case. REBLOG FROM THE SOURCE. Then people don’t get the hit that basically looks like “I don’t WANT to interact with you.” and it makes everyones lives a little better. But I REALLY support sending memes in. I have days where I will just make a post that is MEME HOUR which is if you post a meme as long as I think Atem would be down, I will send you in an ask for it. It’s really fun and it makes up for the times when I’m not on to spam peoples assboxes.

❥ Has someone ever ruined an FC or character for you?

Honestly someone has ruined every character for me at one time or another lol but FC I’ve got a good one. Now it wasn’t from RP but Gina Torres who is one of the prettiest people imho was RUINED for me by the show Angel. Because (SPOILER ALERT) She’s a giant pile of maggots okay? And she’s in some of my fave shows: Firely, Any Day Now, Suits. But I cannot unsee her face on Angel. She just shows up in shit and I scream. She popped up on Criminal Minds once and I just shut it off. She’s in Hannibal and I REALLY want to watch that. DAMMIT.

❦ Has someone been jealous of you?

Maybe, but I wouldn’t know why...I mean I’m just me. Oh! Maybe when I go to cons and meet awesome people? I’d be jealous of me then too.

❧ Have you ever been jealous of anyone?

Yes. There are people I get jealous of. People who get more interaction, people who are here all the time, people who are in a better time zone. So yeah, happens.

✖ How has Tumblr RP changed since you started?

Like I said before, I think I have been here longer than most in this fandom at least the rp side and HOO BOY, things have changed a lot. Remember when we had to tag a post on the side? Remember when Missing E was the extension we all had? No? That’s because I’ve been here forever. Before this I was in the SPN fandom. So yeah. I feel like I’ve stuck around a lot longer than a lot of people. What kills me is that things have changed but not really improved? When are we going to be able to lock a post so people’s art can’t be stolen? When are we going to be able to delete a post and all clones of that post are deleted as well so someone who made a mistake 6 years ago and LEARNED from it doesn’t have to wake up with hate in their inbox every morning?

♒ Thoughts on the fandom you're currently rping in?

I actually really love both the fandoms I’m in right now, though both have some issues. Voltron is fucking unhinged about some shit I won’t get into because no one really cares in this fandom but HOO BOY I’m glad we don’t have that here because we literally have the same thing going on here. HA! I just thought of that. But yeah age gaps man. Just fuck everything about it. Okay done ranting about this before I get my first hate mail

❣ How salty are you feeling right now?

Ask Sophie she’s had to listen to me rant for the last hour about everything on this list. I just screamed about the SPN fandom confusing reality with porn for 20 minutes and then the Josh Keaton thing with his kids so yeah, pretty fucking salty that people can’t just get the fuck along.

#((outoftheafterlife))#Answered meme #Talking with Tiffers #ghostofthering

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