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fresh-bag-of-ham · 3 years ago

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ok let’s talk SUNSCREEN

SO the UV filters available in the US can at this point be considered truly terrible. One of the main reasons you’re supposed to reapply sunscreen every two hours is that many of the filters we use are destroyed by the very UV radiation they are designed to block. Killed in the line of duty, thank you for your sacrifice, etc. Counterpoint: sunscreen is gross and reapplying it every two hours is the worst. I am not doing that. Fortunately, Europe and Japan/Korea have been much quicker to approve newly developed more stable UV filters for use and at this point they have some really good ones. They also have much better UVA protection, both because of the better filters available and better labeling regulations.

A quick simplified summary: UVB causes sunburns, is directly absorbed by DNA strands which causes the mutations that lead to skin cancer, SPF measures protection against this only. UVA does more generic damage, creates free radicals associated with aging, wrinkles, collagen loss, pigmentation, etc. etc., but can also contribute to immunosuppression and therefore skin cancer. It’s more complex than this obviously but that’s not really the point of this post.

My sunscreen criteria: I hate wearing sunscreen. However, Accutane + sun = an extremely bad time. My ideal sunscreen is something that doesn’t feel disgusting to wear so I will wear it regularly in the first place (i.e. dry-touch), something I ideally don’t have to reapply super often under normal daily use (i.e. photostable UV filters, water-resistant when necessary), and has maximum protection. As long as I’m wearing it, I also want as much UVA protection as I can find, without compromising the former criteria.

Note: The sunscreens I tried are almost all chemical UV filters and several are loaded with alcohol, so if that upsets your skin then proceed with caution/ask me for a specific rec!

Note 2: All of these are SPF50+ (the highest rating allowed in the EU (meaning they tested at at least SPF60) unless otherwise specified *cough*Supergoop*cough*)

Best Face: Kao Biore UV Aqua Rich Watery Essence (x)

Best feel, best protection, best price point. This gets recommended everywhere for a reason. Bit of a silicone feel on the face. No white cast. Smells like alcohol at first. Really, really quality daily face sunscreen. Water resistant. Caveat that because of the alcohol I would make sure to throw a layer of moisturizer on beforehand to make sure I’m not totally drying myself out.

Also make sure you get the name exactly right, there’s a blah blah Watery Gel that’s totally different consistency, totally different filters, etc. etc. It has to be Watery Essence.

Best Body: Eucerin Sun Sensitive Protect Dry Touch Sun Gel-Cream (x)

This was a sleeper hit, so shout-out to Eucerin for the greatest body sunscreen I’ve ever tried. This stuff is SO protective and dries SO. DAMN. DRY. Zero grease somehow, feels like nothing. It’s even water resistant. I tried a couple LRP body sunscreens but they honestly aren’t worth mentioning. Eucerin or bust babey!

More Face Sunscreens:

I’ve also tried all top five sunscreens from this Stylevana listicle of Asian face SPF (x). The thing about face sunscreens that they’ve started doing is loading them up with silicones and acrylate polymers, which leaves a silicone-y feel on your skin like a makeup primer. As far as I can tell from poking through various patents, these polymers are doing a few things in the formula: a) emulsifying/stabilizing the newer/bigger UV filter molecules, and creating an occlusive layer over the UV filter molecules on the skin to a) improve water resistance and b) reduce eye stingy-ness. At first I thought I wanted to avoid these seemingly unnecessary additives but considering their function, these are all features I want/need in a face sunscreen so we’re living with them.

1. Shiseido - Anessa Perfect UV Sunscreen Skincare Milk: really good, sliiight white cast but absolutely no streaks, more like a foundation just a hair too light for my skin tone. However I can’t imagine buying this because #2 on the list is better and 1/3 the price. Medium silicone feel. Something I’d probably only break out for when I went to an outdoor summer wedding.

2. Kao - Biore UV Aqua Rich Watery Essence: I have already sung its praises.

3. MISSHA - All Around Safe Block Essence Sun Milk: closest to a US milky/greasy sunscreen experience here, though very fluid and still absorbs nicely. No silicone feel. Not a bad choice but nothing special.

4. Canmake - Mermaid Skin Gel UV: probably second favorite after Biore. Similar, bit less of a silicone feel. I’ve gotten red a couple times using this though, possibly because less silicone feel = no layer of protection against sweat/physically rubbing off? I bet this would be perfect under makeup though, it’s super light.

5. COSRX - Aloe Soothing Sun Cream: SO moisturizing, almost a dewy feel that sits on your skin and never dries. I wanted to love her, but unfortunately she is so loaded with the aforementioned polymers that when you reapply/put the appropriate amount on to begin with, it completely gums up and pills and you lose all protection. Also definitely not water resistant. Probably my top pick for a winter daily face sunscreen that I wouldn’t ever be worrying about reapplying though.

Other Contenders:

La Roche-Posay Anthelios Invisible Fluid (x) and Bioderma Photoderm Max Milk (x)

These two bad boys have the highest rated UVA protection currently on the market, 46 PPD for La Roche-Posay and 42 PPD for Bioderma. The LRP is extremely watery (technically alcohol-y) and comes in a teeny bottle(though same size as a lot of these I guess) but it is The Best UVA protection money can buy. The texture is really nice too, and feels super water resistant. If I’m outside sweating or on the water in the summer, this is going on my face. I've also seen it on sale multiple times since I’ve started researching sunscreens (because it’s extremely popular) so you can definitely find it in the $0.30/mL-or-less tier if you keep an eye out.

This Bioderma is cheaper and also extremely protective (thanks Helena @bronyraurmp3 for the rec!) but unfortunately it stung both my and Mr T’s eyes like a BITCH. Extremely unpleasant experiences for both of us. TBH if I’m out in midday sun, swimming or kayaking or something, I’m gonna be wearing a long-sleeved UPF rashguard to protect my arms and upper body and not worrying too much about whatever cheap greasy sunscreen I put on my legs. This Bioderma stuff would be going on my neck, ears, and hands though bc it’s super water resistant.

Eucerin Sun Sensitive Protect Mattifying Fluid : bit of a white cast, really slippy texture going on and nice dry touch texture when it dried down, but drying down took foreeever. Probably really nice if you’re sensitive and pale.

Eucerin Sun Oil Control Gel-Cream Dry Touch : VERY matte and dry-touch, would have loved it if I hadn’t gotten burned using it (doesn’t have all the newest most stable UV filters). Approaching the expensive end of things too, but would be a lovely option if you really prioritize non-greasiness and don’t need the premium protection? Mr T really liked using it on his bald head lol.

Supergoop Unseen Sunscreen SPF40 (US): This is recommended many places but it has to be a joke that people are actually paying Shiseido Anessa prices for old American UV filter selection, only SPF 40, and no UVA rating to speak of, right??? (ok they do have a PA+++ rating meaning a PPD of 8-16, so. this is acceptable.) I did not test this one but damn wtf. The texture is probably nice though and it looks perfectly sheer in the photos on their website, so maybe as a last resort for darker skintones that show a white cast with everything else? At that price tho... you do you but damn.

Jigott Snail UV Sun Block : This had good reviews on Yesstyle but it sucked. White streaks, bad.

La Roche-Posay Anthelios Ultra-Light Tinted Mineral Sunscreen SPF60 (US): Another in the outdoor-wedding only price range. There’s a tinted and a non-tinted mineral version and I ended up mixing them together to get a shade that looked pretty good on me, but needing two bottles for that puts it in the extremely ridiculous price category. Really slippy nice texture that takes a bit to dry but dries down perfectly matte. I guess the person who wants to shell out for a high end all-mineral tinted sunscreen exists somewhere out there but I would bet there are many nice cheaper mineral options out there that I haven’t tried.

And that’s it! For EU sunscreens, I was able to order them on caretobeauty.com, and Japanese/Korean ones from yesstyle.com or stylevana.com, though I had to go to eBay for the Biore and Anessa. I ordered some Biore from a seller on Amazon but they shipped from Japan and I think they got taken by customs because the last known location on the tracking info is Chicago, so finding a seller in the US that has already imported them seems like a good idea (vendor lullabellabeauty on eBay worked great for me, fwiw, I will definitely order my Biore from there in the future).

If you have specific questions about any of these, or if you have any recs you think I should try, hmu! You will be shocked I’m sure to hear I have a whole sunscreen database at this point.

#skincare

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meowtalhead · 4 years ago

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Warrior cat arcs in order of canon-ness in my opinion

1. Firestar's Quest/Skyclan’s Destiny

Skyclan! I love them!

2. The Prophecies Begin

I'd change a few things if I could (snowkit) but overall this is what warriors is at its core! The old forest and Firestar's story are so iconic and nostalgic there's not much I'd do different

3. The New Prophecy

I love this one so much! The journey, squirrelflight and leafpool's pov, the drastic changes in the clans' way of life that actually held weight. The authors would NEVER do something like that now! The descriptions of the world and scenery on the journey were so interesting too, they captured my imagination. The TRIBE! Crowfeather/Feathertail should have been a childhood crush thing and not True Love though. And I like the brambleflower and squirrelcrow aus. Let's do away with bramblesquirrel and whatever was going on with bramble meeting tigerstar in his dreams even though he's trying to escape living in his shadow????

4. Omen of the Stars

A lot of cool stuff happened in this one. Jay’s Wing, the tunnels, the battle with the dark forest, it was so mystical. Didn't really like the whole second death thing, and I feel like a lot of the whimsy and mystery of the prophetic spirit clan in the stars was lost here. I like dovewing and ivypool!

5. The Power of Three

I love Jayfeather, lionblaze, and hollyleaf but honestly I don't remember much happening in this one. Sol was there, that was cool. The lack of eventfulness is a great background for aus and exploring side characters!

6. Dawn of the Clans

I haven't read this one but it seems pretty good. Clear sky sounds like a total asshole though

6. The one with darktail

I haven't actually read this one but wow darktail was brutal. Skyclan’s back! I love that! But they're becoming Thunderclan 2, and daylight warriors are no longer a thing. Considering the campsites around the lake wouldn't it be cool if they had greenleaf warriors? That would be interesting. Idk i like that they're back but they don't seem like Skyclan anymore.

7. Whatever the hell is going on right now

I just read a pdf of the most recent one. The characters feel so one-dimensional. It feels like they're listing things that are happening rather than, idk, bringing a world to life? Why is bristlefrost so obsessed with rootspring, give her a PERSONALITY. Do i have to do everything myself? Ashfur can do mind control and he's warping reality in the hell dimension and the cat amazons did a ritual because these kits can't stop trying to slap the shit out of that incel. (I don't blame them tbh I would too) Everyone is getting dragged into the moonpool! Yes, even you! I'm very disappointed to see skyclan treated as basically an extension of thunderclan. As far as I'm concerned none of this actually happened but it's certainly entertaining to watch. Graystripe and Mistystar are IMMORTAL

#warriors #warrior cats #what is going ON in the place of no stars??????

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theromanticrationalist · 5 years ago

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Short Treks: My Thoughts

Now that I’ve finally caught up on Short Treks, I thought I would share my thoughts on the series and the future of Star Trek.

Short Version: It’s a bizarrely mixed bag.

Now for the long version. (SPOILERS)

Short Treks: Runaway

I love Sylvia Tilly (who doesn’t?), and this new era of Star Trek has certainly given us some interesting and lovely characterizations. This was a pretty solid short story, and I loved that we got to spend more time with Tilly. I also enjoyed how they tied this story into season 2 of Discovery, which added more depth to her character. Yes, Tilly just makes friends with random alien queens. It’s just what she does.

I also appreciated Po’s dilemma in her fears and struggles with her people about the coming changes of them becoming a warp-capable society. Thanks to Po’s ingenuity and talent, she has given her people a way to stabilize Dilithium crystals, but Po has done this out of a love of science and creativity. She fears the exploitation of her discovery and inventions for selfish gain. As a creative myself, I could relate to Po’s anguish as she desires the purity of her creation’s purpose, the soul, to be preserved above all else. #TheStruggleIsReal

In the end, though, both Tilly and Po mature and grow a little, which was satisfying to see. I look forward to seeing Tilly’s continued trajectory to her inevitable captaincy!

Short Treks: Calypso

Another really solid story, but the only thing was that it didn’t feel like Star Trek to me. It just seemed like a beautiful and haunting science fiction story, maybe something that would be on Amazon’s Electric Dreams (love that series!). It certainly has some interesting implications for Discovery’s future, but overall it felt out of place in the lore. Despite that, this is probably the strongest of the Short Treks in writing, pacing, and emotional impact. Give me a love story with an AI/robot any day of the week.

Short Treks: Brightest Star

This was the one episode of the first batch of Treks that I was most excited about seeing. I think the strongest character and ideas of this new era of Star Trek is the character of Saru and his people, the Kelpiens and their predatory “overlords”, the Ba’ul. The planet dynamics of these species and how they’ve evolved together, and the mystery of how they are inexplicably linked is absolutely fascinating to me. Unfortunately, I feel like the writers really squandered the full potential of the ideas, which disappointed me greatly. 😞However, despite my disappointment, I did enjoy this story, albeit it was much to short. I think it needed to be 20 or 30 mins to really give the full impact of Saru’s struggle as an unusual Kelpien who looks up at the stars and speaks to them. But we don’t really get an explanation of how Saru is able to understand technology at all. We just have to accept that “he’s different”, so he just has the ingenuity to figure things out. I would have loved to have seen him when he was younger giving us examples of how his unorthodox thinking manifested in other ways in order for us to believe that he would be smart and capable enough to tinker and use technology beyond his people’s understanding. It would have also given us a chance to really immerse ourselves in the culture and mindset of the Kelpiens, to understand the psychology that shapes Saru’s very identity. In short, WE NEEDED MOAR KELPIENS AND SARU.

Overall, though, this episode was one of the very few that felt the most like Star Trek, as it exemplifies themes of questioning, seeking, searching, and asking and how that curiosity can lead us to worlds and realms beyond - that we are made for so much more than we could possibly imagine.

This story also gave me Isaac Asimov vibes, which was cool.

Short Treks: The Escape Artist

This one was really disappointing and, frankly, very dull. Don’t get me wrong, Rainn Wilson does a fabulous Harry Mudd. He really adds nuance and cleverness to a character that originally was pretty one dimensional and campy. However, this was the one episode that NEEDED to be shorter, as it went on for far too long, and the pay off wasn’t worth it. It also left me feeling like, what was even the point? Why did they make this short story about Harry Mudd without telling us anything new about him? Yeah, we know he is conniving con man, we get it. It also doesn’t make sense continuity wise in Star Trek because I thought Doctor Noonien Soong was the leading roboticist/android expert, and Data wasn’t anywhere near to looking as life-like as Mudd’s replicas. Somehow Mudd is able to create perfect hosts-from-Westworld androids that sweat, bleed, bruise, and otherwise act like organic matter, able to express the full nuanced range of human emotion as to be clone-like duplicates of himself. Um. Okay??? I guess this lone con man fugitive has made these ingenious and world-shattering discoveries and inventions in robotics and technology. Yep.

Short Treks: Q&A

The absolute best of the Short Treks, IMLTHO. (Yeah, I may be biased...) You can read my thoughts on this episode here: X.

Short Treks: The Trouble With Edward

Yeah. So this one is W-E-I-R-D, even by Star Trek’s standards. I also didn’t get it. I didn’t understand why it was made or why it took the tone that it did. It was funny, yeah, uncomfortably amusing, like we were watching The Office: Star Trek Edition, but WHY. Did someone ask for this? What is going on? WHY DID THEY HAVE THAT PARODY CHILDREN’S CEREAL COMMERCIAL AT THE END ABOUT EATING TRIBBLES WHAT IS EVEN HAPPENING RIGHT NOW

It also doesn’t fit continuity-wise in the timeline. If someone at Starfleet was responsible for making tribbles the way that they are, then how come Kirk and the Enterprise weren’t notified as such? McCoy was the one who examined and discovered why they were breeding so much, but he could have just looked up Starfleet’s records apparently and got all the answers he needed.

I’m not one of those fans who gets upset about continuity errors in world building, but really, there are just some things you should obviously know better not to do.

Personally, I think the writer’s room was on Stamet’s mushrooms when they wrote this one, tbh. 😉

Short Treks: Ask Not

This was one was just ridiculous. The scenario wasn’t plausible, it was predictable, and the implications were kind of disturbing. For one, we all knew Captain Pike hadn’t turned. Yes, this perfect, plush, teddy bear of a man who is THE NUMBER ONE Space Dad of All Timeᵀᴹ who has absolute, unwavering integrity and honor is someone we are supposed to buy as having committed mutiny, or at least convince us that Cadet Thira Sidhu buys this obvious load of malarky.

Uh, I don’t think so.

Also...THIS IS SO MESSED UP WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO YOUR CADETS. Why would you put them through this manipulative farce just to test their devotion, commitment, and integrity?! If I were this cadet I would be seriously angry and upset that I was tricked and made to go through the emotional turmoil, trauma, and distress of standing up against your commanding officer in a life endangering scenario! What the heck?? What sick, perverted, twisted mind thought of this cruel -

Oh.

Haha, okay so I think it is kind of hilarious just how merciless Number One is that she would actually come up with this kind of test. This episode was TOTALLY worth the little Spock and Number One Mutual Appreciation Society moment, as Spock, with stars in his eyes, admires Number One’s cutthroat tactics. I mean in AOS, Spock did come up with the Kobayashi Maru so it is all making sense. However, at least in the Kobayashi Maru the cadets knew they were taking a test. Cadet Thira Sidhu did not. The lighthearted and warm fuzzy ending to this episode did not at all jive with what had just happened. It would have been much more interesting to have dealt with the implications of Number One’s test on the cadets, while expanding on her character as well as telling us why Pike would even partake of and allow this to happen, but oh well.

Short Treks: Ephraim and Dot

The idea? Creative. The characters? Cute. The animation? Really nice with an old school flair. And yet I was once again left feeling like what was the point? I mean I’m sure 3-5 year olds would enjoy watching this little short, like something akin to Looney Tunes IN SPACE, but really there wasn’t much substance here. Frankly, it just seemed like it was a nostalgia trip and Easter egg dump.

Short Treks: The Girl Who Made The Stars

This is another very creative idea with excellent animation and an interesting look into Michael’s childhood and the ideas that shaped her. I suppose it accomplishes what it sets out to do, and is pretty effective, but personally it didn’t do much for me. It was sweet and inspirational and that’s about it.

Short Treks: Children of Mars

This was a prologue of sorts before Picard begins, and so it was interesting to have our first look into what we will come to expect from that series. It was, undoubtedly, emotionally effecting, as it actually brought tears to my eyes. However, I did have an issue with it and I was trying to figure out what that was. I then realized - it felt like a commercial. Like one of those long commercials that tells a poignant little story in order to sell an idea or product, whatever it may be. It was too glossy, stylized, and seemed like it could be used as a kind of propoganda-esque promotion of Starfleet and its ideals. I know that is a kind of cynical way of viewing it, but that is how it felt to me in the way it chose to tell its story. I think if the girls had been allowed to be real characters we could have immersed ourselves in their story and what the both of them ended up having to face together in the end. It would have felt much more real and earnest, instead of just tugging at our heartstrings in a syrupy kind of way.

Also, it kind of gave me The Expanse vibes. Just an observation.

Conclusion

These Short Treks, and subsequently the CBS era of the Star Trek franchise, are a really weird mix bag for me. On one hand, I do admire their creative risks as they decide to try new ways of telling Star Trek stories, which I know not all those in the fandom appreciate or desire. Yet on the other hand, most of the time the writing is just poorly done and generic, so it all seems to just cancel itself out. 😕

Creating memorable, enjoyable, and original characters: 100%

The level of Feelzᵀᴹ felt from the storytelling and acting: 1000%

Creativity through set, costumes, and stylistic approaches and ideas: 100%

Writing: Subpar, 20%

Science: Not Even Science

In the end it seems like those running this new era of Star Trek have a lot of heart, but not enough analytical thinking or patience to take the time to build the necessary character and plot logic that makes for much more satisfying storytelling. Just saying “Space, the final frontier” a thousand times doesn’t make this Star Trek, and making us feel things through excellently composed music and acting isn’t good writing. (Also, people saying that they love science all the time doesn’t mean they are actually doing science!) So, I don’t expect much from this CBS era, but I’ll be watching it and enjoying it anyway. I’m Star Trek trash. What can I say? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Source for images: X

#star trek #short treks #my thoughts #star trek discovery

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hellforcertain · 7 years ago

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i like how one of the few reasons i can pinpoint when about i got sick is that i can use snowmageddon (late 2014/early 2015) as a starting point

this is really long and i’d appreciate you not reblogging this but i don’t think i’ve ever written any of this out, and i would keep it private somewhere else but i kinda want to feel idk. validated? i never really put it into words like this until now. would also appreciate if you respond to this in some way (either a like or a reply) if you read it.

[cw for suicidal ideation in one part; skip the paragraph that begins “at some point that spring...”, after i talk abt my grandpa, if you don’t want to read it. it’s referenced in the next paragraph too. idk if there’s anything else i really need to warn for, but tell me if i do.]

i injured my knee thanksgiving 2013, when i was a sophomore. i was hiking in the hills around my parents’ house with some of my cousins, and it had snowed recently so everything was slick and slippery, and at one point my feet slid out from under me and i tumbled down an incline until my right knee connected with a tree. that thankfully stopped my fall but like, at what cost.

it was so bad that jo had to half-support me walking the couple blocks from our dorms to tufts to have an x-ray done in december 2013, which had been recommended by emerson’s health center (which was a joke; when i saw... i think an NP, she had to flip through a book until she found the “knee” section before she examined me). i couldn’t attend several classes of one of my courses the rest of that semester bcos it was in the building furthest from my dorm and i could barely walk there; i barely made it to the final. i never heard from the health center about the x-ray, so i figured that at least it wasn’t broken. it still bothered me but it became more manageable than it had been (not entirely tho bcos iirc i failed or didn’t complete two courses spring 2014, but that was also bcos of the undiagnosed adhd).

i moved directly into the studio from my sophomore dorm in may 2014, and lived there until june 2015 (which encompassed my junior year until i dropped out in november 2014).

my parents wanted me to fly down to spend a week in florida with them in august 2014, and i think this is what happened: the morning before i left on that flight i rolled off my futon badly and banged my bad knee against the (hardwood) floor really hard. i was in pain for a lot of that trip -- flying certainly didn’t help matters -- and when i got back it didn’t get better so i bought a cane a couple weeks before classes started back so i could get used to it before i had to use it to get to class.

(at the end of that trip, my mom forced me to let her clean out my ear with a qtip, jabbed it in too far and fucked up my ear, and then the next day i got on a plane back to boston and the issue got so bad i couldn’t walk down the street without holding onto a wall. i don’t think my eardrum burst or anything because it was better by the time i actually got to see a specialist about it and i haven’t suffered any permanent effects from it as far as i can tell, but at times it felt like it.)

i bought a cane in mid august 2014, and i know bcos i ordered it off amazon. the florida trip might have been in mid august, so there’s a possibility i banged my knee on the floor before the florida trip, and bought the cane when i realized i wouldn’t be able to walk in florida without it.

i know i reinjured my knee in august 2014, and i know i bought a cane then, and i know i also damaged my eardrum in august 2014 when i was in florida (well, my mom damaged it). i’m not sure exactly what order those took place in.

it got worse as the semester progressed, and i started doing less and less well in my courses, because not only was i dealing with the still-undiagnosed adhd, i was also in a lot of pain all the time. i remember making the conscious decision to stop going to my spanish class bcos the professor would have us stand up and walk around the class and talk to each other a lot and i couldn’t manage standing up for even that long, and i was so scattered and so fucked up from middle & high school that i couldn’t ask for help and the easier option was just to stop attending. i made the decision to go on medical leave late that semester -- probably in november or december 2014, i can’t remember which. there was the death of a family friend who i had been close to around that time too, and i was in too much pain and too swamped with trying to catch up on all these courses i hadn’t been attending to fly to florida and attend her funeral, which was another stone on top of all the others weighing me down (when i told my parents i had dropped out, i told them that it was her death that sent me into a breakdown, which wasn’t entirely a lie; i just didn’t tell them i’d been having a breakdown for months up until then).

i started getting sick and feeling pain that i couldn’t explain at all -- sure, i knew why my knee hurt, but i didn’t know why my joints were stiff and painful, and why i was hurting randomly separately from the joint pain. it got so bad that some days i had to crawl to get to the bathroom, and it was only a handful of steps away from my bed. i stopped doing my t shots bcos it was too much effort when i hurt so much already -- it got to the point that my periods started back up again, though i only had them very rarely. i think the only thing i managed to do was go to my shifts as desk guy in one of the dorms on campus.

when i went to visit my parents at some point, my mom thought it was just bcos i needed to get in shape and lose some weight to lessen the stress on my bad knee. tbh i don’t know when that happened, i just knew it was when i was still a student bcos i went to the gym once with a friend and it was really fuckin painful and terrible and just made everything worse. she might have said that when we were in florida, actually. idk.

living in the studio meant i lived totally alone, but jo was there a lot bcos i had an extra bed (i’d bought a loft bed bcos i wanted one and had never had one as a kid and this place had high ceilings, but i’d also bought a futon for cheap off a guy who was moving out of the building, which turned out to be a real blessing when i couldn’t make it up the ladder to the loft bed; when jo stayed at the computer labs late working on projects, they’d come crash on my loft bed bcos my building was near campus and by the time the labs closed, the t had stopped running) and i made kinda-friends with the security desk guy

that fall and winter i’d say i saw delivery guys more often than i saw my own friends (bcos i literally couldn’t handle the walking that grocery shopping would have required, and i didn’t know abt grocery delivery services at the time. idk if they were even a thing at the time). all “groceries” were bought at the cvs down the block, bcos they had things like butter and shredded cheese and tortillas (i ate a lot of tortillas that year) and pre-cut fruit, and the walgreens across the street from cvs had frozen burger patties that i think set off the smoke alarm every time i cooked them; anything else i ate was from delivery guys. i dissociated a lot that year, very very badly, and some delusional tendencies i’d had in high school came rearing back up.

bcos i couldn’t do much else i threw myself into this site (esp on one of my sideblogs), and if you look at the amount of stuff i reblogged/posted then vs now you’d see that i had p much no other life. which was... not good but i also made some really good and valuable friendships then -- including em so like, not everything from then turned out bad. sadly, a lot of irl friendships stagnated, and it wasn’t the other party’s fault. i also played a lot of skyrim bcos it was one of like. two games i owned for my ps3, and even though the rest of me hurt a lot, my hands were surprisingly okay.

(i also went through a series of nb identities and pronouns that never really fit bcos that was the heyday of tumblr’s whole “if ur a trans man ur evil for wanting to be a man, u should be nb instead” phase and i was far too concerned with all that bcos like i said, i didn’t have much of a life outside this site at the time.)

i don’t recall much of thanksgiving or christmas breaks at my parents’, except that i got my name legally changed during i think christmas break 2014. iirc we had to reschedule my flight back to boston bcos i had to wait an extra day to be able to get everything done that i needed to, and bcos we needed to change the name on the flight. i remember crying at some official bcos they said that they couldn’t get me a new... driver’s license maybe? until a couple days down the road, but i had to be back for college by then and i have everything else done please just let me get my license today. and since it’s a small town in the south they totally folded, thankfully. i was just very stressed at that point, i hadn’t even meant to cry at them.

then snowmageddon happened in early 2015, and classes were cancelled and roads were closed and the t like, half shut down until like may. it was especially bad for me because most of my friends were in allston and they couldn’t exactly get downtown to hang out with me much. iirc, my friend who was an RA left college around the same time i did, maybe a few months before? i think i was still working desk shifts when they left, so it had to have been before i did.

march 2015 was good and bad: during jo’s spring break (and what would have been mine if i had still been in college), we escaped the snow and took their car on a roadtrip down the blue ridge parkway (well. that was the plan but it was closed thanks to the snow, so we drove down I-95 and ended up in asheville nc like two days after our leisurely road trip started. i turned 21 on that roadtrip, and so no longer had to rely on my friends to buy me alcohol, which was nice. we celebrated it at this local restaurant in whatever town we’d stopped at that night, and all i remember is that you could buy steaks from a counter at the front, and the drink i ordered for myself was incredibly orange.

my grandpa also died that march; he’d actually been dying since february, but i didn’t go to see him then; jo and i were in knoxville tn at one point, and my parents wanted me to drive up since knoxville is only like three hours from my hometown, but by then he was p much in a coma so it wouldn’t really be visiting, would it, and also it would have been mega unfair to drag jo into that mess. iirc his funeral was that april, bcos there was a funeral service at my parents’ church where he occasionally preached at, and then one at the mennonite church he attended after moving in with us, and then they had to get him to ohio for the big service (which was the one i attended).

(this was the grandpa who thought i was possessed by a demon for being trans so like. lmao. didn’t mourn him much then, and still haven’t.)

at some point that spring, after the spring break roadtrip and grandpa’s funeral, my dysphoria got really really really bad, bad enough to trigger the most suicidal episode i’d had since middle school/high school. it was a culmination of the negative thoughts and feelings i’d been having since i moved into this place (which had only worsened as i got sicker and when winter hit). i didn’t do anything, but i had to call a friend every time i left the building for like a week so that i didn’t walk into traffic.

i moved out of the studio at the end of april or may of 2015, and went back to live with my parents for a bit because the lease for my text apartment didn’t start until september 2015 (since i was living with friends/former classmates who were still in school and weren’t going to be in boston until classes started back up in september). moving out was an Ordeal bcos my dad came up to help me and brought my sister, who hated boston so much that she was on the edge of a panic attack the whole time, which made her impossible to deal with. at one point we got into a fight over something super minor and it escalated and ended with her screaming at the top of her lungs, in my empty echoey studio that had the door open so god and all my neighbors could hear, that she wished i was dead. this was not the first or last time she expressed this sentiment, and was tame compared to some (like the time she said she’d stab me in my sleep). i told her i’d been suicidal weeks earlier and she left the building to go take something to the car and when i didn’t follow her (bcos i was cooling off), she freaked out and had a panic attack all over our dad. she didn’t tell him why, or that she was at fault, and when i came down a few minutes later he ripped into me until i stopped and told him what she had said. so, yknow. a fun final memory of that apartment.

i think that was when my mom finally acknowledged that my pain wasn’t just a weight thing, and that i should actually see someone when i got back to boston. my symptoms got worse too: i started having horrible pain in my hands, to the point that i couldn’t move them, and none of us really knew what to do. i found some compression gloves online and begged my mom to let me get them but she kept refusing because she was worried i’d mess my hands up worse with them, and i still don’t entirely understand that train of thought, because i was like, screaming crying at them because i was hurting so so much, and some compression gloves couldn’t have been worse than that (and i finally pointed out that they were gloves; i could take them off if they were hurting more than helping). they finally relented, thankfully.

june 2015 was the first time i met em in person; i decided, almost on impulse, to take a week and drive down to florida and spend the week with them bcos they were living with their grandparents at the time and their grandparents were going to be out of town for like a week. they played a lot of fnv on their ps3 while i played don’t starve on my laptop. the place had a guest bedroom that was technically mine, but i don’t think i ever used it except to get changed; we tended to pass out in weird positions on em’s bed. we didn’t get much else done bcos i discovered that florida weather + my joints wasn’t a great combo, but it was still an amazing week.

that same summer i also got fitted for my knee brace. i think that same summer i got some treatments from a sports medicine doctor my mom is friends with. possibly steroid injections? i’d have to ask her.

i moved into the medford house with some friends in september 2015, and dear lord was that a mess. the roommates were great, don’t get me wrong, but the house had mice we had to take care of, there was a gas leak at one point bcos the stove’s knobs didn’t work right and didn’t shut off the gas when we turned them off, the boiler was a broken leaky piece of shit that would shut itself off every like two days bcos the water level got so low (contrast the place we’re living in now, where we had to go put more water in the boiler maybe like. three times all winter), the landlord and his wife were total creeps and freaks -- he would only respond to my email even though my roommates tried to open lines of communication at various times, and one time i woke up with her in my bedroom bcos she was checking the radiator (which wasn’t working bcos the boiler wasn’t working and they refused to fix or replace it until winter was over) and she had the audacity to chew me out for my space heater. i was fucking sick, lady. give me a fucking break. the best thing, hands down, about the medford place was there was a corner store with a good deli across the street, so i could go in my pajamas to get a good sandwich and a box of fries. great place, great people.

i got referred to a rheumatologist that fall, and my first appointment with him was in november (i also at some point... i think in spring of 2015 started using testogel, because i wouldn’t have been able to get the stuff for injections refilled while i was in kentucky. i don’t remember when i switched back to injections but i did at some point while living at the medford house, which i once again was terrible at keeping up with).

at the time, my deadname was still on my insurance bcos even tho i’d changed my name earlier that year, i was still on my parents’ insurance and my dad wouldn’t fucking change my name there and wouldn’t give me the information to do it myself. my rheumatologist took one look at me and how i was responding to being called my deadname, and he asked if there was another name i went by that i’d be more comfortable with, and i was rarely called my deadname again after that (and only by a couple nurses until they got to know me better). ofc that stopped being an issue when i switched to my own masshealth plan (in early 2017 i think?).

he listened to the whole mess of a story, felt my joints, and then poked at the middle of my chest (which i now know is a common fibro trigger point). when i recoiled back bcos that hurt far more than it should have, he said “yep that looks fibro-y.” i don’t remember if i suggested fibro and/or rheumatoid arthritis, or if he did. he prescribed me some medications -- including tramadol, my savior that winter. i’d been taking tramadol already bcos i’d had some left over from... i think lasik, and a friend had given me some percocet for very bad days. i was so unused to the tramadol back then that it’d throw me for a loop, occasionally make me nauseated, and also knock me out. it was p great.

back then i’d have to ask my roommate danny to open like, water or pop bottles nine times out of ten bcos i just couldn’t. now, i can’t remember the last time i had a serious problem opening bottles on a consistent basis. there have been some bad days where i couldn’t, but it’s not like that’s all the time.

i improved in fits and starts after that; i can’t remember all the meds i tried with him, but i’m sure they’re in a file somewhere that i could request. i still wasn’t doing anywhere near good, but it was better than before -- if only, maybe, bcos i wasn’t dealing with this totally on my own. but you know what didn’t help? that house’s terrible fucking boiler. we’d wake up some days in the middle of winter and it’d be in the 50s inside the house, and i was the only one who knew how to fix the boiler (i’d taught the roommates, including the subletter we got when danny left for a semester in LA, but apparently the only one who could go down the stairs to take care of it was the fuckin cripple).

spring 2016 was awesome bcos i’d gotten a ps4 and destiny for christmas, and the subletter we got had two cats who i loved and who loved me, and everything was beautiful even tho i definitely still hurt a lot. i can’t remember much of note during this period, health-wise. it was mostly more of the same, but on top of it was trying to balance playing a shooter and having shitty hands that didn’t want me down anything with them.

summer 2016, when i was still in the medford house, em came to visit me (among other people -- they roadtripped up over the course of a couple weeks) and spent several days there. i had plans to take them to do touristy stuff in boston, but that never happened haha. and like we don’t have a solid date on when we got together bcos long-distance stuff can be fuzzy about things like that but that visit was our first kiss.

in september 2016 i moved into the allston apartment, and the less i say about that the better. i started back with a therapist in like february 2017; i hadn’t been to a therapist for years by this time, bcos my previous therapist had moved to a different office in the network and then left the area and i had never gotten back in touch with her after she moved to the other office. i also started on testopel, because injections were once again not working out.

that apartment was p much like living in the studio bcos even tho i had two roommates, it was an apartment i’d found in an emerson group centered on finding roommates, so i hadn’t known either of them beforehand; i wasn’t really living with them; we just happened to share some common spaces. health-wise i improved some as we found medications that worked for me, but i was still not doing even close to good. i had trouble going grocery shopping even though the grocery store was only a handful of blocks away because various parts of me would hurt too much to handle it, and by the time i was halfway home i would be almost dead. so, yknow. not a great time overall.

in september of 2017 i moved into this house with em and jo, and it’s been a fantastic decision bcos im finally living with people who care about me and will kick my ass into shape if i need it. em finally made me go to my rheumatologist and be like “so i know i’ve been saying i’ve been fine but i moved in with my partner recently and they’ve pointed out that im doing less fine than i said bcos i’d brushed off a lot of things as normal that they’ve told me are not, in fact, normal”, which was when he prescribed flexeril, and i think that’s helped me more than almost anything else has. holy shit. im taking a higher dose than my father (who’s like 6′1″ and has at least a hundred pounds on me) can handle but it’s working for me. i also went back to t injections a couple months ago bcos i didn’t enjoy missing everything for a week bcos it took forever for the testopel spot to heal, and i couldn’t sit on the spot until it healed; plus now that i’m living with em, they can remind me when i forget to do my shot. also, after a lot of fits and starts and panic over the last few years, im finally talking with a surgeon about top surgery.

overall like, i went back and looked at a lot of posts i made several years ago to get dates for this point, and i can barely recognize myself in some of those posts. my illnesses had ground everything else away, until all that was the physical pain and the emotional anguish, and i wish i could tell my past self that it gets better: that he’ll find medications that work for him and he’ll move in with people who he loves and love him back, and that it’s not all sunshine and rainbows here in 2018 but it’s so much better. 2015 me definitely deserved that.

and that’s true: that i’m not cured, and i still have very bad days, but i’m also having more and more good days -- days that were unthinkable back then. i’m on medications that help me physically, and i’ve been diagnosed with adhd and am on a medication that helps me mentally. when i flew down to kentucky earlier this month to attend my sister’s graduation, my dad remarked on how much better i was walking and moving just compared to thanksgiving. i can’t even imagine comparing myself now to myself a few years ago. i think i’m going to save this post so that when i’m feeling down about being sick, i can remind myself how far i’ve come, and how much i’ve weathered so far; whatever storm comes next, i think i’ll be able to handle it.

idk where i was trying to go with this, but it ended up a super overly long chronicle of the last few years. so uh. yeah. like i mentioned before, i’d appreciate if you show that you read all this, either with a like or a reply, esp if you get to the end

#nick gets personal #not 4 ur blog #fibro diaries

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academiceve · 7 years ago

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My Favorite + Most Used Stationery Items (for College/University)

This is the “I need new stationery for back to school” guide by yours truly (juniorincollege). Please keep in mind that there are two main types of students, those who don’t care about stationery and will buy a pen from a library 5 minutes before a lecture and those who are obsessed with stationery and like to buy such items early, in order to be prepared for university.

However, just because you buy new stationery every school year, it doesn’t mean that you will get good grades. I regret to inform you that there is no correlation between new stationery and straight A’s.

Another disclaimer: these are stationery items that I have used and loved the past 4 years of undergraduate studies at a university. What I like + use may not be what you like to use. You also don’t need an excessive amount of stationery, but since I often receive questions about my favorite stationery pieces, which I constantly feature on my studygram, I decided that it would be nice to have it all in one post (for future reference), including photos of how the items mentioned below look like (mostly taken by me), as well as links where you can purchase them online. I like to shop during back to school sales (broke college student problems) to get good deals; therefore, I won’t be able to link all of the items (I shop at local grocery stores and still manage to find cute stuff), but it will give you an idea what to look out for.

Now that this long disclaimer is over (I hope you read it!), let’s begin the list:

STAPLER - is a savior when you need to staple handouts or papers that you have to print out for class and you can’t run to the library to staple together. I would get a small one, so that you could carry it in your pencil case. This is the one I have and use to this day (it lasted me throughout university all 4 years).

PENCIL CASE - any cute + small pencil case will do, as long as you like the shape, size, color + pattern of it. You can find them everywhere, from stores like Flying Tiger and Muji, to Ebay/Amazon or AliExpress. Just have a look, I have this one from O’Neill.

AGENDA/PLANNER/BULLET JOURNAL - college students NEED to have and use planners, in order to keep up with assignments and not fail. I used to use planners provided by my university; however, once they stopped making them, I bought a small pocket planner while studying abroad in South Korea. People get very particular about planners/agendas, so buy what you would like/is available to you. You can also try to use a bullet journal, but I wouldn’t recommend it, because it’s a hassle to keep up with. If you would like to learn more about what is a bullet journal, you can click HERE. If you want to start a bullet journal and need a notebook for it, I would HIGHLY recommend these Leuchtturm ones, I have one in red and I love the quality!

BACKPACK - let’s not pretend you can carry all of your life in a cute bag, so please save your back and get a sturdy backpack. There are so many different + cool styles out there, that look beautiful and stylish and are also practical. I personally have a Herschel in this style and size, Herschel backs are of great quality and beautiful designs, I highly recommend them! But I would also recommend checking out these brands: Fjallraven Kanken (very popular), Superdry, Mi-pac (my friend loves hers!), Converse, Hype, Adidas (they look really great!). I do suggest investing your money in a quality backpack, because they will last you a long time!

NOTEBOOKS - I prefer A4 size, gridded and college ruled, spiral bound notebooks for note taking. They don’t always have the cutest designs, but they’re very practical! I found them really comfortable to use! HERE are some, similar to the ones that I always get.

PENS - people like different pens for different reasons. I like ball point pens in blue + black, like these ones from Staedtler or THESE. If I can find them in a pack of different colors, I usually buy that (so then I can color code my notes + planners/calendars). I’ve also heard a lot of hype about these Pilot pens. TBH any brand works! So get whatever is available to you!

COLORED PENS/HIGHLIGHTERS - this is a separate category for those who are into color coding or taking colorful notes and like to have/use different pens than ball point style. I like using fine liners for note taking/headers, like these ones. I also use highlighters for readings or important information in my notes, these and these are good. Again, anything readily available will do, you don’t have to buy expensive stationery.

PENCILS - for tests (if you’re in the US) or notes, or drawings, etc. HERE are the ones I love to use daily (except I have ones without rubbered tips). Again, any pencils will do, you can also get mechanical ones (whatever you like).

FOLDERS - for sorting out syllabus, class readings + handouts, papers that you have to print out. You can do 1 notebook + 1 folder per class, or get a multiple slot folder, which is what I did. HERE and HERE are some similar to the ones I used. I’m sure you can find some in your local stationery stores.

LAPTOP - this is an obvious one (it really should be item no. 1 in this list) if you’re already a university student. Your life will be on your laptop. Make sure you get one that is lightweight, because you will have to carry it, so don’t forget that. HERE are some that some tech people who know shit about laptops recommend. Also HERE and HERE. Honestly, just get someone who knows stuff about computers/tech to help you, make sure it’s with a discount 😉 and will last you 4 years. NOTE: You don’t need to splurge on a Mac book to do well at school, I personally used a Dell laptop and got straight A’s, so... a laptop isn’t everything, but it’s an important item for every university student.

So there you go, a list of my favorite/highly recommended stationery items for university students!

P.S. when I asked my friends what they would recommend or would include in this list, one of them said “A friend who has pen and paper” because you can borrow them from people in your class.😂😂😂 Like I said, there are different types of students.😉

If you have more questions, please don’t hesitate to message me. If you would like to read more from me, click HERE to see other blog posts! You can also follow my studygram HERE for some inspiration!

#eveincollege #written #stationery #back to school #university #notes #studygram #studyspo #masterpost

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johnnythirteenguns · 7 years ago

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just seen justice league (this isnt spoiler free at all)

also went to thor: ragnarok for the third time to wash the taste out.

so i went to go see it for miller, momoa, and mera in that order. i was super impressed with mera. i thought they were gonna go the like easy way and give her an Accent like the amazons, but they didnt. even though her cadence was different like idk man i know very little about dc but i picked up a one-shot earlier this year where mera neatly beats the fuck out of the justice league on her own and she’s a semi-jerk who kind of hates surface dwellers and you know what for the thirty seconds we had her onscreen i believed it and she was powerful and felt like a character with backstory and i COMPLETELY didnt hear what aquaman was saying i just heard her side of the conversation

man ben affleck really doesnt wanna be here huh anyway we should recast him at the earliest convenience

also why was batman 90% CGI like fine i get it no one can be a gymnast in a 50 lb rubber suit but like every single one of his moves that required any bending had to have been cgi

speaking of which the cgi isnt like bad in and of itself it’s just typical like it’s the cgi youre used to seeing. it doesnt blend seamlessly into anything and the characters dont blend seamlessly into it. the cornfield looks fake as can fucking be and i dont really know why? what else there was another fucking weird cgi moment. anyway, steppenwolf is ugly as sin and has no emotion and is all one color and is??? generally weird looking

speaking of which. he is not frightening at all. the New Gods isnt something casual dc fans are gonna be familiar with (i am barely familiar with it) and like? apparently, darkseid was supposed to have scenes in this but didnt? anyway go see thor ragnarok which features 1) a horned villain that is legitimately terrifying and powerful, that you fully believe can do the things she does, and who is beautifully designed and 2) features glow-y eyed masses of disposable soldiers that are cool but goofy and dont take themselves too seriously but were still frightening and made for thrilling fights because you believed they could actually pose a threat to the characters they were attacking

the beginning... uh i think like three scenes of the film looked pretty good, but they looked like cutscenes. very GOOD cutscenes, but honestly... if i wanted it to look like this id have played... a video game. like, i want it to look like a real place even if it’s heavily stylized. uh but the first showdown where batman is luring a parademon out looks beautiful if fake as shit. the scene with wondy in the bank (which features a group of girls from an all-girls school... at a bank?) and terrorists wearing cheap pinstripe suits (like, this is fine! it’s nonsensical and stupid but fine it’s a comic book movie) was kind of cool because for once i felt like... maybe diana was a creative person who goes in wit ha strategy? like picking the dude up with the lasso and holding him up was fun i was like oh!!! thats not something a typical movie would do! it was the first time she felt like Wonder Woman to me (ive seen the wondy movie itself, it was... eh). uh and idk what was up with the standing on the scales of justice or whatever idk the hilarity of gal gadot on that statue which sits on top of a bank like. it was funny.

hey question what the uh... fuck was the “what are you” “a believer” line about it made zero sense in context at all

dont quote me on the order of scenes i dont remember fuck all of this movie in order because literally, the pacing was so weird. so... it was very obvious there were parts missing from the movie. not like, cuts made where you could be like oh there was something there or maybe there'll be a deleted scene no like you Knew there was stuff that was necessary that was gone. the football scenes with victor from the trailers were gone!!! i think the movie was trying to set up a really strong friendship with wonder woman and cyborg but it never really went anywhere? and i suspect because it all got cut! and i dont understand why because ray did a really good job and he sold cyborg to me so well i loved his take!

also... i dont know if theyre saving it for the aquaman movie next year but did Arthur get a bunch of his stuff cut too? because i like jason momoa, and i like his arthur and so im sort of torn because, like, he didnt have much to do. like, he has the bit where he sits on wonder woman’s lasso of thruth and tells them all this stuff but you dont know enough about him for any of it to land? but i really wanted to know more (at some point i did give up on, this was a very passive viewing experience). my friend was saying that like literally why did they try to make arthur so Cool he’s already jason momoa he is by default cool now you can do whatever you want with him we’re all going to love him.

speaking of the lasso scene... was the entire last half of the movie re-writen and re-shot by whedon because like? the lasso scene is a whedon. the bit at the end where wondy goes “children. i work with children” is a whedon (THERE’S NO REASON FOR HER TO SAY THIS? I THINK THIS WHEN SHE HAS TWO TEAM MEMBERS LIKE LAYING ON THE GROUND AFTER NEARLY BEING BLON UP? IT WAS FUCKING WEIRD). i genuinely cant tell if all of barry’s dialogue was written by whedon or if that was ezra improvising but uh... man he’s... he needs to practice if that’s hm. if it’s just whedon i mean fine but he also doesnt have the shitty RDJ quality thats let’s him say those lines with believability.

speaking of which, going to see barry was my priority because apparently im gay for miller rn so like. uh. man he wasnt funny like there were a couple parts where he was cute and the line landed and it was fine but generally he just... wasnt funny? because the movie wasnt funny? like... idk man ezra really acting his heart out and ive said like cool i wanna follow his career and see if he does good stuff and gets even better at his stupid art but maybe he peaked with credence barebone i dont know. the first scene where we meet barry, with the flash pad and the pizza, that was good, that was funny. the bit at the prison was good. he has very soft eyes and thats nice. the panic attack is cute in the clip and the beginning like rhrgrh moment he has is good but then idk the pacing falls apart again

why is his character like this? i just dont think ezra’s... funny enough yet. (tbh i think he takes it too seriously even if he’s trying to be light-hearted man sometimes jokes is just jokes). there’s a bit where theyre digging up superman’s body and it’s JUST HIM AND CYBORG FOR UH? SOME REASON? maybe they explained why they sent the two babies but i didnt hear it and it’s literally just them two. and he tries to fistbump victor but vic is like “no” and tbh barry is annoying? like maybe u think he’s cute and an audience member but he’s uh... you can tell he’s annoying in the story and anyway then the flash says “right, racially charged” ABOUT A FISTBUMP? WHICH? LITERALLY MADE NO SENSE? WAS THIS LINE IMPROVISED? WAS IT WRITTEN? IM GONNA PUT MONEY ON IMPROVISED BECAUSE HE IS EXACTLY THAT KIND OF STUPID BITCH

if they were breaking into the lab why even bother going through the front door? barry drives the thing in (theyre trying to smuggle superman’s body into star labs) disguised a soldier (the literally most unconvincing thing, not to me as an audience member, because it was cute and funny to me,, but that a guy with THAT FACE is military like yeah sure, why did that guard believe him) but then they get to like the normal ass parking inside and the other three are standing there in full costume in full grey DC-brand daylight? are you telling me between 5/6ths of the justice league they couldnt sneak in a fucking pine box when wonder woman can lift a fucking tank on her own? like.

speaking of which uh.... superman is stupidly overpowered. like i said i read an issue of JL where mera hands every one of the justice league members their own gently roasted ass in hand on her fucking own. diana regularly kicks superman in the head. why was she not able to take him down? when theyre fighting steppenwolf for real it’s not until superman shows up that they even have a real fighting chance. they dont fight as team, they dont even fight as people casually unified in a common cause. theyre playing high-stakes legos and cyborg gets pulled away from them like three times?? and it gets fucking annoying? and then supes shows up and literally wipes the floor with him. it is so completely bizarre and stupid.

here’s a problem i still have with wonder woman: why is she so thin? the other amazons (except Hippolyta and maybe one other one) look built as FUCK? LIKE THESE WOMEN COULD EASILY TOSS ME ACROSS THE ROOM. wonder woman has serious fucking arms, where are they

also those amazon bikinis were bad. the whole styling of this movie is bad, but especially the amazons. everything is red and gold, for some reasons? the outfits dont looks heavy like armor, they look heavy like bullshit material. there is no reason for the fucking bikinis. the gold cloak hippolyta wears is??? heavy and looks like? like drapes like window dressing like thats the weight of it. additionally, there is no reason for their hair to be SO STYLED. it’s really like prom night hair it’s like shiny and muss free and always loose and in perfect clearly salon-styled curls. also, why are they so heavily made up? it’s really prominent. wondy herself has the same issue going on, she looks much more heavily made up (why is everyone’s blush so PINK, like it's distracting, is this a side effect of the recoloring process) and her hair isnt loose and doing its thing like in BVS or Wonder Woman it’s like... idk she looks really. Pretty when she’s on the field and it makes no sense.

the amazon fighting style is still ugly and makes no sense ive never seen such a wasteful fighting style it made sense exactly once during Wonder Woman

why is themyscira entirely the ugliest cgi i have ever fucking scene

why does the camera INSIST ON MOVING LIKE THAT. the action is super hard to track, the cgi is ugly as fuck (it really cannot be overstated)... i made it to about... i want to say when theyre on the way to the big fight and then the combined everything gave me a heaache that o had for the rest of the movie

i mentioned earlier that the pacing is weird the transitions are also weird. you get cuts to and from places that never fade into each other, it’s always a hard jump cut but it’s never the right cut to make? like, in thor ragnarok for example, there are a bunch of scene changes that happen via the bifrost, via people going through doors. there are wide shots that jump to wide shots in other places, so youre not suddenly on a close-up. there are a lot of people emerging from something into view, and there are a lof of people being alone in the center of the frame. it’s a very smooth and easy to watch movie. JL is the opposite of this in every way. I SUSPECT. AGAIN. THAT WHILE THIS WOULDNT HAVE BEEN FIXED ENTIRELY. THAT THOSE EXTRA TWENTY MINUTES THAT WERE CUT WERE PROBABLY REALLY IMPORTANT

the lois lane bit where she calms supes down just reminded me of the age of ultron and i quoted “sun’s going down” at my friends who were with me and they shit themselves laughing

ma kent calls lois lane “thirsty” in a Hilarious Teen Humor Gag thanks joss whedon you fucking hack

bruce wayne is fucking useless he could have got barry ANY JOB EVER and like... my god whatever.

also i still dont understand how how voice sounds like that when he’s batmanuh the after after credits scene is setting up, according to my friend, a sinister six movie. deathstroke isnt played by manu bennett so it’s fucking usless thanks for coming to my ted talk

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