#i should clarify its still bad. but at the same time so bad its good. while still being bad. and yet good!

[lavenderjewels]

jjk 267 leaks + spoilers in the tags. ill be completely honest i understand the jjk criticism I’ve seen for this chapter but i also don’t care

[carcarrot]

you know a bad movie's good when you feel like seeing it again

[ihavethedreamies]

Standard Practice | Easy to Expert (3 v2)

Lee Yongbok (Felix) & Kim Seungmin - Stray Kids

Rating: M (18+) MDNI

Word Count: ~2.2k

Felix/AFAB!Reader/Seungmin

Genre: Reader-Insert, Smut, Fluff

!!This is smut…if that much isn't clear you should probably leave now!! MDNI!

Warnings: She/Her Pronouns used, Swearing, Kissing, Cosplay (Puppy Lingerie), Multiple Partners, Oral (F! Receiving), Threesome, Double Penetration, Anal Play, Sex Toys - Butt Plugs, Anal Sex, Cockbulge (Slight), Unprotected Sex (Bad Idea, Don't Do It)

Author's Note: I was supposed to just do a part two for Felix's Easy but now I have these as well…

-> Series Hub <-

-> Part 1 <-

-> Part 2 <-

-> Ver. I.N. <-

-> Ver. Hyunjin <-

-> Ver. Han <-

-> Ver. Lee Know <-

-> Ver. Changbin <-

-> Ver. Bang Chan <-

I am cross-posting this on Archive and Wattpad. Please reblog! If you know anyone that would like this or future fics but they aren't on here my name and icon are exactly the same on the other sites. Happy reading!

"She wants to what now?" Seungmin was glad he hadn't taken a sip yet, removing the straw from his mouth. He would have choked for sure, especially when Felix repeated himself.

"A threesome."

"With me?" Seungmin clarified and Felix shrugged nonchalantly. This was not something to shrug about. Felix was asking his friend to fuck his girlfriend. With him as well, but still.

"She personally requested…me?"

"Yes, why are you so shocked?" The slightly older guy snorted a laugh, shoving a fry in his mouth.

"It’s just…I figured she would want Chan or Minho-hyung…"

"She said you. This was about a month ago-"

"Why are you just now asking?"

"I wasn't about to let the third time I slept with my girlfriend be a threesome." Felix deadpanned and Seungmin tilted his head back and forth in agreement.

"Valid. When?"

"Tonight?"

"Tonight?!"

"Too soon?" Felix was so calm and flippant about it. That made Seungmin more confused than you wanting to fuck him too.

"N-no. I mean, we were going to her place to hang out anyway…"

"Exactly. Don't worry, I'll walk you through it."

"She knows I'm coming?" Seungmin stopped your boyfriend before he plugged in your keycode.

"Yes?" Felix chuckled. He had never seen his friend this nervous.

"Why are you freaking out so much?"

"Look, I have never done anything like this. Plus…its (Y/N). Your girlfriend."

"Min, it'll be fine." Felix finally inputted the code to your door.

You heard the door unlock from where you were in your room, and you scrambled to get ready. When your boyfriend told you the plan, you eagerly prepared. He hadn't, however, told you what was in the bag before you went to put it on. Your headband had floppy dog ears and they flapped against your head as you moved. The tail on the end of the plug pulled on it oddly, different than you were used to, as you moved about. You were in more or less a bikini that was made with faux fur that matched the ears and tail. You had leaned over to rest your elbows and chest on your vanity to get ready because you couldn't exactly sit. Making sure your make up was good, you wiggled your nose, the end painted black. The only other thing Felix made sure you did was apply bright red lipstick. It was in the bag as well, liquid in a tube that claimed to be waterproof and smear proof. You kissed a tissue to make sure it worked, and it sure did. Did Seungmin like it or something? You shrugged, adjusting the thigh-high sheer tights on your legs. Your nails were rounded and painted black, highlighting the ensemble well. Brushing your hands over your leg, you waited at the foot of the bed for the boys to come in.

"Oh, look at you, love." Felix cooed as he entered, and you wondered if there was a tail plug out there that could also wag. The final touch was the silk choker you had donned, a tag with your boyfriend's name on it dangled from the necklace. He slipped his finger under the metal to look at it better and grinned.

"(Y/N)." Seungmin nearly gasped seeing you, dressed up like a puppy. His cock already was starting to harden, but the icing on the cake was your bright red lipstick. Felix really did know him too well. You skipped over to him and smiled up at him, adopting the puppy eyes perfectly.

"Can I help?" You reached up to the collar of his shirt and he nodded, still gaping at you. He really was so freaking cute to you, and luckily, he felt the same way about you. You led him through the motions of taking his sweater off, then you undid the button down, letting both garments fall to the floor. You had never seen Seungmin without a shirt before, not even caught a glimpse of his shirt riding up. He was in a white undershirt still and he seemed shy to remove it, but let you help him anyway. His nerves dissipated when you explored his bare skin with your hands. They were soft and warm, and he couldn't wait to feel them on his cock. Through instinct he leaned forward toward your face, but you backed away quickly.

"Rules!" You pointed at him, like you were scolding a puppy.

"No kissing, not on her lips!" Felix came up behind you, already without his shirt and he swung his arm over your shoulder.

"You must listen to him!" You held two fingers up. You then added a third.

"Her ass is mine." Felix emphasized, playing with the tail of your plug. You squeaked when he tugged on it lightly, the noise going straight to Seungmin’s cock.

"Four!" The man continued, letting you finish.

"No cumming down my throat." You tossed Felix a playfully rebellious look.

"Why?" Seungmin scoffed a bit, not understanding why that specifically had to be stated.

"I like it too much…" you mumbled and Felix snorted.

"So, only I can." Felix let you go, and you held out all five fingers.

"Finally, you don't have to wear a condom, but you can't cum inside." You finished and the other man balked a bit.

"You on the pill or something?"

"Yes…but I like it a lot so once again…"

"Only I can." Felix finished and he came over with two bottles in one hand and a third in the other. You looked over the options and pointed to the purple one. The new set of lubes he got were cooling, almost like menthol. You were not sure what that would feel like, but the purple was grape scented. Going back to Seungmin, you started to undo his belt and his hands stilled yours.

"Let me do it, puppy." He kissed your forehead and your cheeks warmed. Felix said none on the lips, so he didn't. You stepped back and he let his jeans fall and you watched enthralled as he removed his boxers too.

"Can she sit on my face?" Seungmin asked, not breaking eye contact with you. You and Felix were a bit surprised at his boldness, but Felix smirked.

"Sure." You glanced at him, and he nodded in reassurance and Seungmin eagerly went to your bed and laid down. You scampered over as well and climbed onto the bed. The tail would be in the way otherwise, so you hesitantly straddled his face, facing the wall. The tail plug ticked his chest, and he reached up to undo the ties of your furry panties, then chucked them to the side. He hadn't considered the tail plug, so it tugged a bit when he removed the garment. Another squeak left your lips and you saw his cock bounce slightly through the fabric of his underwear. As he wrapped his arms around your legs to get ready, he noticed Felix looking at his phone, then he heard a buzzing noise. You yelped, the toy inside flaring to life, you did NOT know it did that.

"Felix~" You tried to scold, but the sensation was too nice.

"Come here, puppy." Seungmin encouraged and pulled you onto his face, his tongue swiping through your slick folds before it wiggled inside your cunt. He could feel the vibrations of the toy, and his hand came around to press on it. You keened at the feeling and Felix watched closely as you rode his friend's face. You were mewling, but he didn't see your characteristic shiver that he always caused you to have. Seungmin wanted you to fall apart on his tongue, but you and your boyfriend knew he probably wouldn't succeed. He just wasn't Felix.

"Okay, love." Felix prompted and you wiggled in Seungmin's grasp. He placed another suck to your clit, then let you go. He wiped your wet off his face and moved to get off the bed when Felix motioned him to. Your boyfriend took his place and you turned to face away from him. Felix rested his back against the headboard and Seungmin moved to kneel in front of you. Without your help or asking, he quickly undid the clasp of your bra and tossed it away as well. He loved the ears on you, and the head band didn't seem to be bothering you, so he left it on. Felix was a little shit though, telling you to put red lipstick on but not letting his friend kiss you. Seungmin came forward and started to kiss over your neck and jaw. He might not be able to kiss you fully, but he was going to take advantage of your bare skin. You whimpered as he licked over your collarbone. Felix allowed it, he was following the rules.

"One, two-" Felix then slowly pulled the tail plug from you and you shivered, it too getting discarded somewhere across the room. Your boyfriend grabbed the purple tube from the nightstand and messily drizzled some on the head of his cock. The cooling sensation was odd, and he couldn't tell if he liked it or not. Without even bothering to smear it over him completely first, he pulled you down to him. Seungmin's hands went to your waist above Felix's on your hips and helped push you down. You shivered and moaned as his cock found its rightful place in your ass, the cooling burn of the lube made you quake as if spread through your insides. After you had sunk down completely you exhaled, resting back against him, letting out a few twitches. Seungmin couldn't believe how hot it was to see his friend balls deep in you, your still empty cunt on display. Felix draped your legs over his, spreading them open wide for Seungmin. The look in the slightly younger man's eyes was surprising, you had never seen him look that intense.

"You want Min to fill your little cunt?" Felix's deep voice rumbled in your ear, and you nodded eagerly.

"Ask him, then."

"Please, Min." You squeaked when Felix moved you a bit so he could get more comfortable.

"Okay, puppy." Seungmin crawled forward, having to kneel between both yours and Felix's legs to be in the right spot. The head of his cock brushed through your folds, and he groaned at the wet heat, more intense without the barrier of a condom.

"Ahh~" You almost wailed as he started to sink in. Seungmin and Felix both groaned as your already tight holes got even tighter with both of them in you. Your boyfriend waited till his friend was as deep as possible, then he pressed his cheek to the side of your head.

"Look, here, love." His hand rested above your belly button and Seungmin's eyes too went to your stomach. The outline of a faint bulge was visible, your little body struggling to hold both cocks. Seungmin huffed at the sight, and you tried not to clench harder.

"She is so fucking cute." Seungmin muttered and Felix smirked in agreement.

"Start Seungmin." Felix nodded and he held you as the other man pulled out about halfway before sinking slowly back in. Your breath got heavier, your head resting back on Felix's shoulder.

"Rougher." Your boyfriend prompted and the other sent him a look.

"Yeah?" Getting a nod in response, he did. You gasped as he started to fuck you in earnest, Felix simply cockwarming in your ass.

"Want me to move, love?" Felix nibbled at your ear, and you were having trouble thinking with the pace Seungmin was setting. Both Felix and you were shocked by how aggressive Seungmin was being, fucking you fast. When you whined at Felix’s request, your boyfriend motioned for Seungmin to slow down. You readjusted, sitting up a bit more and you leaned forward into Seungmin more, hands on his biceps. Your boyfriend shifted behind you, and you squeaked when they both thrusted hard at the same time. You shivered and as they each took shallow, synchronized thrusts, making you let out tiny whimpers.

"You like being that full, huh?" Seungmin whispered in your ear, and you nodded, head resting on his collar bone. He was already getting close. Your cunt was like a vice and just the fact that he was fucking you was leading him over the edge. Felix noticed his brow furrow and knew his friend was close.

"Cum on her stomach." He told the slightly younger man and Seungmin reluctantly pulled out and pumped his hand over his slick cock. Felix pulled you back to him, pumping his hips slightly, grinding you on him. You let out a high-pitched moan as Seungmin grunted, coating your chest on tummy with cum. He sat back, catching his breath and he looked to where Felix was inside you still. Your boyfriend had buried his head in the crook of your neck as he came, the sticky substance spurting out of you slightly. Seungmin watched enthralled as your quivering hole clenched as you came as well. You slumped back onto Felix when your orgasm died, and he chuckled.

"That good, love?" Felix removed the headband and let it drop to the bed, smoothing your hair. You mewled in a positive tone.

"You always get her this fucked out?" Seungmin asked.

"Standard practice at this point."

-> Series Hub <-

Master-Master List

Stray Kids Master List

[raspberry-vinaigrette]

i fear i will get eaten alive for this but i find it so odd that some people act like flipside dave just... isn't reality dave. because flipside dave did, 100%, do all of the things reality dave did and see very minimal issue in doing it until after several layers of the flipside where he realized henry wasn't just killing kids and he didn't, in fact, "have good intentions." this is emphatically said after steven has his flashback, which is right about when dave is like "alright so Maybe I Was Wrong". and under the assumption reality dave isn't flipside dave in any sense... i dunno man. it feels reductive.

yeah, reality dave did do bad things, whether he was entirely aware of the wrongness of those things or not (depends on what you're talking about -- it's kind of a grey area for a lot of things), but that's the point of him redeeming himself. that's the point of jack freeing davetrap's soul by burning the restaurant down. that's the point of jack saying "i hope you can find peace with what you've done" to dave before he leaves with blackjack. that's the point of dave getting better. he did bad things and he acted poorly to jack sometimes and with how his soul is split (on top of jack uh... ditching him for 35 years in some bid to force him to move on) his reality self is much clingier and more aggressive when pushed to its limits -- jack and dave both emphatically say that dave's reality self cannot move on from henry / jack and that's why he keeps coming back. they're still two halves of the same entity. to treat them like they aren't two halves of a whole, just under different circumstances, is ... kind of ignoring a big part of dave's arc, imo?

fundamentally if flipside dave hadn't done anything that reality dave did, what is the point of him taking accountability? what's the point of his entire talk with dee? what's the point of him having to deconstruct what he did and what henry did to him if he isn't somewhat accountable for all he did, y'know? obviously he isn't entirely consciously reality dave, but they're two parts of the same entity pushed to different extremes in different contexts. davetrap was isolated and abandoned and he is incapable of moving on properly, much as jack tries to get him to before turning to burning the restaurant down, and he's going to inevitably have a WAY harder time acknowledging that henry did anything bad because that pedestal is all he's hinging on. if henry is bad, dave coming back over and over was all for nothing, so of course he's in such vehement denial and clinging so hard to this idea.

of course he can act hostile or aggressive or creepy to jack in certain endings, his one role model was the man who watched him with cameras to study him, cut him open and took out his organs, constantly gaslit him and manipulated him into thinking he wanted everything that henry did and then ditched him. of COURSE reality dave is therefore clingy and scared of abandoment -- flipside dave expresses this same fear, getting borderline guilt-trippy when jack first says he'll leave until jack clarifies he plans to come back. it's to a far less severe degree, yeah, but it's still clearly a part of both daves. to act like reality dave should be condemned and flipside dave was just manipulated is to act like theyre not effectively the same entities in different contexts.

i dunno. you can have your headcanons and i don't want to sound mean to anyone who considers them entirely different people because that's ultimately not my territory to tread on and it hurts nobody. if you enjoy it, have fun with it! i've just always found it reductive and like it ignores kind of the point of dave needing to take accountability and be redeemed and it tends to lead to reality dave being dismissed as "all bad" and flipside dave just being traumatized and "the good one." not sayin everyone with the headcanon does it and ultimately this is just my interpretation off canon so im not the end all be all. it's just something on my mind

[rin-and-jade]

Guys, did you know that alters still and will form/split from little T's and Micro T's? Well now you do!

Whenever you are living your life, doing your day, with no recurrence of childhood trauma for a good while.. but you still seem to have new peeps? Yet you don't know why?? Fret not as i tell you some, although not an extensive list of reasons such as;

The Lil' T, things that aren't as severe as the Big OG Trauma but still enough to waver you:

Financial issues

Relationship conflicts (hostility, or inconsistent emotional support)

Having debilitating/chronic health issues (be it physical or mental)

Neglect, victim of harrasment/bullying, invalidation and etc (in mild forms, clarification on below)

The Micro T, that are capable to annoy you like a fly, though you still have a limit to these type of T's:

Working a job with high demands, or a stressful environment

Chasing a deadline (and not just this once)

Bad triggers

Involved in arguments often (aha, i know you still think about it)

Now you're asking, "what should i do then, Jade?" and because you need some prompts (tips), here you go:

Relaxation techniques: when you feel like you're going to explode (or something lit up the fuse recently) then its logical to blow the fire out before it can actually explode. Things like having a warm shower, taking care of yourself, or some time off to wind down for a moment will help.

Regulating feelings: antsy? mad? upset? or "dshsdfhgjfds"? Instead of shoving the feelings away, please let yourself feel it, acknowledge that you are currently feeling and understand why it happened, what's the cause, talk it out to someone to feel better but yelling inside or writing in the private server also works.

Outlets: If you feel like writing down isn't enough/helpful, then maybe doing art, crushing some empty cans, or going to your trusty support group will do just fine.

Therapy: got money but not people? Do yourself a favor and try it, you'll learn lots of coping mechanisms, plus you'll have support and someone to talk to so thats a big win.

Mindset: Having an accepting and self-supporting thoughts are way better than devaluing and adding extra blames and faults as it perpetuates the cycle of stress and pressure, so why not go easy on yourself from now on?

I know you might think that its not severe enough, its not bad enough, but from now one you have to think differently, no matter how big or small, it is still stress, and when stress builds up all those things happen. (to top it off with other issues such as bad internal communication and brain fog) And it make sense because the severe ones are enough to form new peeps, same goes for the tiny ones but are consistent, okay?

I personally struggle with this LOTS even if traumas from the past aren't happening again yet i still have subsystems and all, and after a good while of practicing, it now barely happens. Hope this is also helpful for you guys since the previous post about dissociation was a hit!!! Click here to see it

Edit: it came to my attention that i forgot to clarify that yes, harassment, bullying and etc as it’s own severe form and can be classified as the OG Trauma, though there are minor forms especially in bullying where it’s extents from calling names and other stuffs that aren’t as harmful in a physical form.

- j

[mulders-too-large-shirt]

s5 episode 15 thoughts

long day. i want scully and mulder time.

ooh, looks like this episode will be about mr. mulder! mr. william mulder, i should specify; i am not just referring to OUR mulder with that title.

will we also see baby CSM?! will the puzzle pieces fit together, or drift further apart?!

i think mr. mulder is kinda cute. like a clean matty healy.

(WORDS I LIVED TO REGRET TYPING!!!!!)

now, what mischief has he gotten up to today? killing people? i’m not really shocked. 

so, it looks like we will not actually get any scully and mulder time, but i’m open to change after the CSM episode. it was really interesting. let’s see what is in store.

‼️HATER ALERT‼️i should not have been open to change. this episode pissed me tf off. what do you mean we are changing mr. mulder’s face and making roy cohn put spiders in your belly? HELLO? can you even hear me? did i really just watch this? 

we begin in 1990 in wisconsin. strange place to be. a sheriff is here, coming to get someone who is locked in a house.

“i don’t much enjoy evicting old folks”, says the sheriff. wow. almost a conscience there.

but the guy he is with promises this old person shall change his mind. and from the spooky music that is playing, i am inclined to also think something is about to go down.

edward skur is being evicted, and he is not opening up his door. but something in the house smells very bad. uh oh. this is never a good way to start an episode.

this house is very messy and dark, and mr. skur seems to be watching from a distance. it’s covered in bugs. icky.

the other guy sees something horrible and throws up!! let me guess: a body? 

UGH! i wasn’t technically WRONG, but it’s a MUMMY in the bathtub!!! it looks really old!!!! like, ancient kind of old!! 

which raises the question: do mummies smell bad? i kind of assumed after a few centuries it just went sort of… neutral

i need to research this later.

anyway, skur tried to grab the sheriff, but he fired his gun. he hit mr. skur, and as he dies on the ground, foaming at the mouth (??), he calls for MULDER????

huh??

idk if either of the mulders can help you with your smuggled mummy... i just really do not know 💔 i fear we may need to call the authorities to get that mummy back to its sarcophagus or perhaps bog home

(i assume it will be some kind of alien, but you have to admit it looks like the result of a tomb robbery)

intro time!!! yeah yeah yeah make some noise!!

and they shortened the intro again...! must be for a good reason?

(NO. NO GOOD REASON)

so it’s still 1990 here. and mulder is going somewhere…. to an apartment. looking for arthur dales.

he introduces himself as a profiler with the behavioral sciences unit (aww! baby mulder! he looks pretty much the same as current mulder, but with longer hair)

oooo, this dales man used to work for the bureau… he opened up a case on edward skur in 1952!!!

arthur claims he doesn’t know what went down

mulder brushes some hair out of his face (aww, the slightly different hair style, they really want us to notice it)

“do you know what an x file is?!” “it’s uh… yeah, it’s an unsolved case” <- ohohoho, do i, the viewer, ever know what an x file is!

arthur clarifies: “no, it’s a case that’s been designated unsolved” <- hmm okay. so they basically didn’t want to bother solving it because it might be incriminating. pretty important distinction if he's telling the truth.

apparently, skur disappeared many years ago after killing a bunch of strangers and removing their organs. most of the report on the matter is censored. but now he was found and shot last week, and a man in his bathroom found with all his soft tissue removed. yuck.

so NOT a stolen mummy nor an alien. for the sake of historic preservation, i am glad skur was not a guy who kept mummies in his bathtub. we need those for research purposes.

ohhh!!! arthur tries to shut him out, but mulder asks how tf skur knew his name!!! an excellent question. 

“you ever heard of HUAC, agent mulder, the house un-american activities committee?” <- not sure if i knew before this that HUAC was pronounced “hew-ack”, which is a really terrible way of pronouncing a word, but i guess it makes sense for the time.

arthur says mulder wouldn’t know about HUAC… girl, that man is a walking encyclopedia. don’t doubt him.

“they found practically nothing. you think they would have found nothing… unless nothing… was what they wanted to find?” <- very cryptic. i like the idea that the red scare was a coverup for alien stuff. makes more sense than what actually went down. but on the other hand, it kind of undermines the senseless destruction that came with mccarthyism by giving it an in-universe purpose.

so i changed my mind. maybe i don't like it.

mulder again plays with his hair (lmao) and says that he’s sorry, but doesn’t see the connection. aww, he’s a little baby! he cannot even see a connection! and then arthur slams the door on him. rude af.

mulder is watching news footage from the mccarthy era to research this case. roy cohn is mentioned, and every time i remember that roy cohn was a real person, i have to take a deep breath. 

apparently the term “fellow travelers” referred to those sympathetic to the communist cause back then? i genuinely had no idea. damn, my modern history knowledge is lacking! listen, they don't teach you much past WWII in US history 101 and 102

god. roy cohn mentioned, again. he is said to be the man who “brought the rosenbergs to justice”. this makes my skin crawl.

(little did i know what this episode had in store for me...)

mulder has a little card that identifies edward skur as a member of the communist party. now, i understand that was a controversial group to be a part of, but i fail to see how this leads to stealing organs. we’re missing some context.

look at mulder with messy hair and glasses!!! he rewinds the tape and recognizes someone in the background of the hearing!!!

good lord…. he’s attractive.

(perhaps the highlight of this episode was mulder in glasses. it gets me every time)

anyway, it’s his dad he recognizes. which is obviously very shocking.

AWW, he brings mr. dales some coffee the next morning :,) he shall not be deterred!

mr. dales tells him to go ask his father, and mulder says “my father and i don’t really speak” <- damn… are we going to get the story behind that?? i mean, we know a decent part of it. maybe that is enough.

BAHAHA dales slams the door again and i was thinking “buddy, he will subpoena you” and then mulder says just that lmaooo

and this works on him; he opens the door back up and says that edward skur worked for the state department just like mr. mulder. our mulder must have known that, but said nothing! 

OHHH he asks if his father was involved, and dales just lets out a big sigh. (shocked mulder voice) how??

and how did he remove the organs but not the skin??

is mulder smoking right now?? i guess hearing your father was involved with a bunch of murders is stressful enough to make a guy open up a pack.

(i literally could not figure it out. it just looked vaguely smoky. i didn't see a cigarette being brought up into his mouth. does anyone know? because if mulder smokes or smoked at some point, i'm going to need to add that to my internal list of facts about his character and then analyze what that says about him. please tell me, and thank you)

dales says he can tell you how the organs were removed, but not why. what do you know?!?!

in regards to the communist allegations- that is what "they" all said "they" were!! this clears up very little

way back in the olden days, dales is arresting mr. skur!! they plant a communist card on him… or else they really did find it as soon as they arrested him, which i find hard to believe. his wife and kids watch this happen :( poor kids

dales is at the bar getting a drink after busting reds all day. someone calls the bar looking for him!! it’s his partner!!! skur was found dead! 

this is stressful for dales…. he drinks his bourbon.

he has to go tell mrs. skur that her husband died, and it was his fault for arresting him. drinking and driving is not advisable, but this is not stopping dales. he’s waiting outside the skur’s house trying to find the words when he sees edward skur run by!! this ought to be impossible!! due to the dying!!

chase scene!!! WHAT THE FUCK DOES SKUR HAVE LIZARDS IN HIS MOUTH??? he pins dales down and SOMETHING emerges???

the neighbor hears them scuffling and skur runs away!!!

HUH??? MOUTH LIZARDS?

okay.

dales clocked in the next day after almost getting eaten. his partner has something to tell him. now he has pictures of the dead skur taken BEFORE dales was attacked last night!

dales clarifies he didn’t have *that* much to drink. and his partner says to leave him out of the report, but he already turned it in!

the justice department is calling him!! they need to chat! oooo dales is in trouble...

(these scenes are very bright and foggy to indicate they take place in the past and it’s a little distracting lmao)

HE’S GOING TO SEE ROY COHN?? HE’S A CHARACTER IN THIS SHOW???

woah… he sits next to dales. scarily. and asks if he knows who he is. “then you know how important my work is” yeah. they must expel the communist vermin. sure, sure. 

“everything is political, agent dales” <- very ominous. 

dales seems to be the only one that can identify the man who attacked him as skur, because his wife and the neighbors sure deny it.

does roy cohn know about the aliens???

he’s just staring at dales. he knows he has to edit skur out of his report, but he’s not sure why. “you’re not supposed to understand; you’re supposed to follow orders” <- damn. very very creepy guy.

(tbh, i don’t really know what real young-ish roy cohn looked like, so i cannot comment on if this guy is the spitting image of him or not. but he is very unsettling)

so, dales changes his report, saying the suspect is unknown. and all the information on skur is blacked out, just as we saw in present mulder’s hand!

but skur was already out doing murders, so dales cannot leave this mystery behind. they go in the murder house where they find a german song playing, and a picture of the house's owner- a doctor- shaking the president’s hand. hmm. who is this german doctor guy?

it smells like hospital in there, his partner reports. not a great smell.

and they find the german guy’s body… it’s really grotesque!!!

the cops arrive at the scene, telling the agents to put up their hands. they have no idea who tf these agents are. then who called them there?!?!

ohhh, dales finds a coaster from the bar that says “come alone”….. secret code....

he’s in this little secluded booth thing at the bar (what? i thought it was a confessional at first? did bars back then have a random little private booth section? what was the purpose of this?)

anyway, this new guy says he was trying to SAVE the dead german doctor, but he was too late, and skur killed him. and dales will be next. 

meanwhile, his partner is at home bringing in the groceries, and i can imagine what will happen next….

OHHH HE HAS A CUTE ORANGE KITTY. highlight of the episode.

back in the booth at the bar, mystery guy says that skur and “the others” are patriots who work at the state department. skur, gissing, and oberman. and now the other two are dead by their own hand!! they couldn’t live with what they’d become!!

they (cohn and the government?) had to put out a story to cover up what they did to skur…. what did they do?!

WAIT, THIS GUY IS MR. MULDER? he looks different than the other mulder actor!! did he get a new actor?? did they just change?? am i crazy? is that the same guy? is he lying?

(i was second-guessing myself so much that i went back to rewatch the part of apocrypha that had him in it and i KNEW. i KNEW that was a totally different guy. one that looked like a clean matty healy and who i had grown attached to. this dude is just someone else entirely! is it some sort of plot trick? a recasting? what is afoot?!?!?)

((if this WAS done for plot reasons, you can tell me. because it would make me feel far less annoyed. even if the reason is a later surprise like "gasp! turns out bill and william mulder were DIFFERENT PEOPLE". you don't have to specify anything. you can just say they did it for a reason. but i have a feeling this is not the case)

“mulder” (i am suspicious) claims that he cannot keep this secret any longer, and he risked his family to come here and tell dales. 

meanwhile, his partner sits down to watch mccarthy do his thing on the TV, but the cat knocks his beer down

mr. bill mulder says that mr. cohn and mccarthy are involved in this…. skur wants revenge for what they did to him. and skur thinks that dales and his partner are involved!!

dales gets up and asks for the phone, and he’s calling his partner, whose number was “klondike 5 0133”, making me realize i know nothing about how old phone numbers work. but his phone has been unplugged!!!

 and skur is going lizard or bug mode or something on the partner!!

WHAT THE HELL?? I REALLY REALLY REALLY DISLIKE HOW THOSE LEGS CAME OUT OF HIS MOUTH AUGHHHH

the next day, the coroner is trying to examine the body. and who rolls in but roy cohn! he says that they can’t take the body to the morgue. 

OH SHIT: “what are you talking about, i’m no communist” “you are if i say you are” daaaaamn. that is crazy. backed right into a corner there. 

roy cohn, how did you turn that guy into a spider on the inside…

“when your partner dies, a piece of you dies with him” <- okay so mulder and scully, take notes. you can’t die on each other, okay? thank you.

dales needs to avenge his partner’s death!! so dales must find out what happened to the other two men who mr. bill mulder said are now dead, but also had that “thing” done to them.

OH this secretary put the info on one of those guys in an x file!! “why don’t you file them under ‘u’ for unsolved?” “that’s what i did until i ran out of room” <- LMAO queen… THE x file creator!!! everyone say thank you to her

(i feel this is a definite retcon of the x file lore, but whatever. what do i care? they already changed this dude's whole face)

gissing was found dead with his doctor, but the don’t know how the doctor just… collapsed.

gissing had some recent surgery… his body is still in the morgue. dales says CUT HIM OPEN NOW even though the coroner says the family will yell at him he does, in fact, do the cutting open

waugh… something in the esophagus… EAUGH I CANNOT LOOK. IT’S A SPIDER??? SPIDER SEWN INTO HIS STOMACH?? 

i do not like that.

dales runs back to mrs. skur to try and explain her husband was discredited to cover up roy cohn putting spiders in his belly, i guess.

“it’s called xenotransplantation” <- that doesn’t sound gooooood. at all. THE GRAFTING OF ANOTHER SPECIES INTO THE HUMAN BODY??? augh. and i was going to have dessert after this. 

so it’s a nazi thing, and the german doctor must have been continuing his experiments in the US! yes, operation paper clip, we have spoken of this before on this TV program

dales wants to expose the truth, and he needs skur’s help to do so. he leaves mrs. skur the coaster with a mysterious message….

when who pulls up but mr. cohn!! telling dales to get in the car. and mr. bill mulder is there, too.

mrs. skur is sneaking out the back door, lifting up the hatch to a fallout shelter, going to find her husband. he’s in incredible pain, and he starts to go spider mode and eat his wife!!!!

roy cohn takes dales to the FBI. damn. and the lore dumping begins from mr. hoover. there are more soviets than capitalists now, btw, and this is very bad. 

dales points out that those random men who were experimented upon were not communists, which makes hoover counter that they must do even what their enemies would be afraid of. like put spiders in your belly.

dales has one chance to save himself. he is to go meet with skur and then the other men will come get him. so that is why mr. bill mulder was sent to talk to dales! not out of the kindness of his heart. “i follow my orders”, he says, and that famously is *not* a good reason to do terrible things. 

dales is alone in the bar, waiting for skur, pouring a drink. and skur arrives, saying his wife is dead. 

“they’re not coming, you know. they wanted me to kill you, or you wouldn’t be here” oh shoot… is he telling the truth…? is dales being set up?

now skur is going after dales, with mr. bill mulder having to be restrained from going in the bar to save him!!!

dales manages to handcuff skur before the spider can emerge, but he runs away and hides!!

cut to a baffled present day mulder. “i can’t believe my father threw in with these men (very deep sigh) he let them dictate his conscience” <- well, that seems to be a reoccurring theme with bill mulder

“you keep digging through the x files and they’ll bury you too” <- that is promising! /s

but how was skur able to get away and live in obscurity? was he kept in a lab? maybe someone let him go?

MR. MULDER GAVE HIM THE CAR KEYS AND LET HIM GO!!!

in the hope that the truth will someday be exposed??

the end.

huh. what am i even supposed to think here? 

well, all i can think about is how different bill mulder looked.

i can’t even fully articulate WHY this episode made me so mad beyond its sheer absurdity and the fact that i am obsessive about details and a recasting always gets under my skin. except that i am also darkly fascinated by the comic book villain level hijinks that the real roy cohn got up to, and using him as a prop in the alien show could have been kinda interesting, but i feel that making him the spider guy was NOT the move. who did this benefit? anybody? was there not another case for mulder and scully to tackle? who on the writing team said “you know what this needs? mouth spider”

and putting aside the whole new body mr. bill mulder somehow obtained- perhaps there is a good reason for that, and i am being judgemental without knowing the full story, but still, you cannot fool me- he let the spider guy go?? knowing that he would be slurping insides for the rest of his life? and is this supposed to be heartwarming? because my heart isn't warmed.

i mean, if skur managed to go most of his life without slurping, until the very end, that is... good, i guess? but then he slurped once more and an innocent guy died. so. uh.

earlier i spoke about the different categories of x files episodes, specifically the bad ones. i have copied those notes from before below:

"category a is: this is blatantly offensive. who approved this? (gender bender, excelsis dei)

category b is: this writing is so out of character i feel disgraced (3, the parts in oubliette where scully is just mean af to mulder and tells him to stop trying cpr??? and rift-era episodes)

category c is: just kinda boring af, monster isn't even camp it's just weird, also tends to be overly dark in theme to the point where no one is having fun (calusari, the walk)"

i'd place this in category c. if you were going to use some of the most notorious figures in 20th century history as plot points, DO something with them beyond "he puts spiders in their tummies to fight communism". i am not compelled by this. i do not think anyone would be. and if i am supposed to think "oh, poor mr. bill mulder, he was so morally conflicted" i guess i just don't... really care that much. at least not in this particular instance. choosing between his kids was intense and fascinating, plot-wise. choosing to free the lizard guy helped no one but lizard guy, who went on to do more murdering.

and there wasn't even scully!

[thelonewolf48]

Hello, Blank the series community!

How are we processing the ending of season 1? Are you angry? Do you understand Khun Neung's actions? Do we want to hit her? Yes, you say? 🤣🤣🤣

I wanted to wait a bit (also got busy at work lol) to avoid any spoilers for anyone who don't watch Episode 6 and last one for a while... I don't know how I'm gonna cope with it tbh... I'm following 23.5 and other web series but tbh... never on the level of Blank... I have to admit that GAP did it first but Blank did it better... which, no shade to GAP because FreenBecky, my beloved, chemistry was so good too!

And to clarify, GAP the series also had its own set of problems, most of them regarding money and locations, but what they did, opened the door for more GLs. Some, with good and bad executions, but that's up to each person and their preferences to decide!

BUT ENOUGH OF GAP (the perfect GL, to me!) Let's talk about BLANK!

As a start... I didn't like that they began from when Aneung knocked on Neung's door... it ate like 4 more minutes with them, plus they didn't keep the same tension.

On Episode 5, the tension was felt thanks to the zoom on their faces that lasted quite a good amount of seconds and Faye's minuscule lean.

This time it was cut and then bam! KISS! (NOT THAT I'M COMPLAINING!)

I'm not gonna go on full detail because I believe we all watched the episode, there are a few technical things I want to point out but I won't because nah! There was some foreshadowing to the doom that was to come... and no, I don't say this as a person who has read the book 🤭

I will go straight to that last part...

I had to go back to read that last part in the book because I wanted to keep this as accurate as I can.

So, throughout the episode, we see Aneung's family praising how good of a Role Model Neung is for Aneung. This is the first red flag. Then we see Neung still having doubts about their age gap which I find normal in this setting, because it can happen. This is the second red flag.

The final nail to the coffin, and the one I think everyone should consider whenever questioning WHY Neung broke this as cruel as she did, is that she thought she used Aneung as a way to distract her own pain.

In the book, and the reason why I re-read it, Neung sounds more detached, more out of the moment, and at some point even more aggressive about it. In the series, Neung, although also feeling out of the moment, the scene takes a more soft and romantic approach. They show us Neung's walls falling and accepting that she does indeed love Aneung.

Also, the "brake up" is harsher. Feels like a slap.

Now, we have to consider that in the book, right after their love making Aneung goes to school, everything seems fine, heavy, but good enough. Things happen, that I won't reveal because it could be spoilers, but one of those things is that Fah calls Neung about the funeral and everything. Fah is the one telling Neung that she trusts Neung, she's a role model, and she knows she will take care of Aneung.

Here, there is something I wanted to point out. To hear Fah say it, right after what happened it's what triggers Neung to break Aneung's heart. As logical as Neung is, that is the conclusion she gets after everything.

Aneung is young, thus can fall in love again with someone around her age. This is the conclusion Neung forms in her head. Plus, she sees something else that triggers a reaction. Something we will see in season 2 😆 so, no spoilers but maybe some of you can imagine what.

Neung is very logical, very cutthroat, and as stubborn as their grandmother. We have to remember that, as the eldest, she was trained to be the next heir. So, her life was very, very different. If you see any royal family, the image they project is one of perfection. So, it's no wonder that Neung learnt how to mask her feelings. If something hurts, hurt it back a thousand times worse. Or better yet, just ignore it.

Neung, just like Sam after she became the heir, prefers avoid her feelings because she knows caring equals pain. So, why bother?

There's a whole process Neung does before she goes to Aneung, in the book.

But I have to admit that the series spin was chef kiss! I'm sure that Neung, after waking up, was blaming herself for letting things escalate so quickly.

I will defend Neung with my whole heart because the traumas she carries makes her scared. And like a feral animal, the only way she knows how to defend herself is attacking. She pushes and pushes until she proves to herself that she is right. Everyone leaves.

I could continue rambling and going and just word spit things, but I have to sleep 🤣🤣🤣

Don't share spoilers if you read the book! Unless people want them, I will keep my posts spoiler free! Either way, if anyone wants to discuss the book, you can send me a message too!

Once again, I say this Blank the series set the bar waaaaaaay too high! I can't deny it!

Anyway, guys, do you agree? Disagree? Let's have a respectful debate!

[elexuscal]

Network Effect, but it happens immediately on the tail end of Exit Strategy

this is one of the funniest fandom AUs out there, imo. (also one of the saddest! but also like. in a fun way)

Mensah, Pin-Lee, Gurathin, and Ratthi are just SO glad to be home soon

they're also really glad that SecUnit seems to have regained the ability to talk

even if like, only 40% of what it says seems to logically follow whatever conversation they were having

like that sounds like a dig but they seriously have spent the last 2 weeks thinking its brain might have been totally fried

so they get in a shuttle to go back to the station when

mysterious ship appears out of nowhere?

YOINKS them

murderbot is like 'hey that's my friend wtf ART'

"what do you mean," its humans ask

it Does Not Clarify

maybe just says like a random stream of code, aloud. completely impossible to parse

i'd like to remind everyone that Dr. Ayda Mensah has some Severe Kidnapping Trauma that has not managed to start unpacking at all at this point. and now she's been kidnapped. again.

at least her friends are along for the ride this time???

(she feels awful for being this relieved)

ship is totally empty when they get on board

except for creepy grey people

SecUnit started being able to walk around its MedBay like 47 hours ago

it was not pretty. it fell on its face like. 3 separate times.

now it has to kill a bunch of targets

it still manages it but not with anywhere NEAR its usual level of grace

this just makes it more angry

it does not help that it keeps forgetting where it's in its own timeline

keeps pinging ART. keeps being surprised when it doesn't answer. all over again.

the humans are the ones doing the majority of the Smart Detective Work and making theories on What's Happening Here and interrogating Ras and Eletra

Ras and Eletra who, by the way, are like 'hey your SecUnit is seriously glitching you should probably put it down.'

'no'

'okay we can at least turn it off and shove it in one of the mortuary tubes-'

"NO"

"yeesh okay we're just giving a suggestion" [Eletra and Ras exchange a 'get a load of these crazy freeholders' look behind their backs]

MB is currently have a conversation, aloud, to a crumpled drone

good news: being in a familiar environment is helping MB's memory retrieval

bad news: those memories are letting MB know something Is Very Very wrong

1-3 emotional breakdowns happen during this point. One of them is definitely Murderbot's

it's even worse than in canon Network Effect

"My friend is DEAD"

they haven't found ANY dead bodies at this point, though, so...

PresAux starts realising maybe the dead friend is... an AI?

Ras's brain gets fried around this point. Then Ratthi, as the closest thing the team has to a doctor, has to cut Eletra's chip out of her neck. so he probably gets one of those emotional breakdowns.

'wtf how did we get out of a wormhole so fast??'

In this time-line, Murderbot is in no state to fight AND do complex coding attacks at the same time

(it's really in no state to be doing even one of these by the way but oh well)

that mean Pin-Lee and Gurathin are absolutely doing the majority of fighting off TargetControlSys

and then MB gets that delayed datapackage from ART

"For Eden? what the fuck does that mean?"

is it a religious message? a code?

"hey isn't there a character named that in Sanctuary Moon?" asks Ratthi

MB might be in a pitched firefight at the time but that is no reason for it to not ramble about its blorbos and how cool Eden is

Mensah starts getting an idea

They find ART's secret coding bundle

they try putting in 'Eden'. doesn't work.

okay that was too obvious. try 'Sanctuary Moon'.

nope

'SecUnit'? no

'Murderbot'? long shot but... no

since they have a copy of MB's purchase contract, they have its feed address documented. it's a real long shot, but they are desperate at this point. they try it

Re-Load in Progress. Please stand-bye.

i honestly have NO idea what MB says when ART comes online this time

maybe something super sweet and sappy. or maybe it's even less coherent than in canon

either way, the humans are like 'Holy Shit' upon realising who/what Murderbot's friend ART really is

[animealways]

beter future

exdeatheater!reader x draco (post war)/ contains past torture, survivors guilt and generational trauma (draco wants to thank you for everything but realises there is only one way to truly pay you back)

'Draco?' You furrowed your eyebrows when you saw the malfoy heir on your door step. 'H-hello...' He said rather ackwardly, like he wasn't sure what to say to you after... everything you suppose. 'Um this, its for you.' He handed you a wooden box. You took the box still confused as to why he is here. As you opened it you found jewelry ring, necklaces, bracelets, ect. You looked back up to the pal blond even more confused then before.

'I know this doesn't come close to repaying everything you did for me but... I-i figured i should atleast give you something, anything in return.'

He seemed rather desperate, almost like he was scared you were going to reject the gift. You looked at the gift and back to draco. You gentely put the box next to you on the ground. 'Look draco i know you feel like shit after... everything we did.' You look down at the inside of your left forearm making both of you cringed at the last part. Remembering all the trails, mission and tasked the 2 of you had to do as death eaters even if the 2 of you had completely different motives making both you and draco hold the left arm. 'And at times it feels like we shouldn't be here... That we should have died instead...' You took a deep breath hoping he will take the message. 'But were here and should try our best to never let this happen again.'

'What do you mean?' 'Well voldemort couldn't have done half the damage he did if he didn't have so many followers.'

'oh'

He looked down rather ashamed making you frown and sigh. 'You know what your probleem is?' He shook his head avoiding any eye contact. 'You act the way you do for the malfoy name, not for yourself.' Draco furrowed his eyebrows, looking rather confused.

'What is that suppose to mean?' 'When was the last time you did something that somehow didn't involve your family?'

...

'I-i don't remember...' He mutter quitely but you could here it clear as day. 'Look i have seen how your family is and i can't blame you for never questioning them but we can't let another war like this happen ever again. I don't know about you but i want to be married some day with childeren and i certainly don't want them to go thru the same hell we did.' He finally looked you in the eyes.

'I do too.' You looked back down at you left arm and stretch it out infront of draco. 'Can you promise me that on the darkmark?' His eyes widen surprised by your question.

'Can you promise me that you will do beter then your father and well... the damn mark isn't gonna go away anytime soon so it will be a good reminder.' You clarified. He looked down at your hand and back to you. 'I promise you that.' He grabbed your arm as you grabbed his in return. You smiled at him. 'You know draco, you aren't that bad once you stop worring about your family.' You let go of him, grabbed the box, waved him goodbye as you went back inside.

Maybe we can be friends

You randomly thought to yourself as you went back to your room.

[alemonyoyo]

No Country for Young Humans - Chapter 8

Got this chapter out a lot sooner than planned. This chapter does NOT pass the Bechdel test I am SORRY. But on that note, from what you should expect of this story; a lot of MC and Star. This is definitely an idealised narrative that is moreso focused on the relationship between these two characters rather than the ongoing story of the Underground as a whole. Of course, elements of the Underground and the happenings outside of The Wild East will become prevalent, but MC and Star are the main focus, hence why there is so much focus placed upon MC and Star. I just wanted to clarify this!

Missed the previous chapters? Check out the Masterlist!

Words: 3397

Tags: GN Reader, No use of YN, Flirting, Teasing, Does not pass the Bechdel test

Summary: Finally you've returned from Waterfall, and your feelings are starting to swell. Taking a break from the hustle and bustle of celebration, a more quiet figure plagues you with a question.

Chapter 8 - The Childhood Friend: BGM: Undertale Yellow OST: 069 - Getting The Thoughts Out

You hadn’t expected to be near tackled at your own arrival back home, but it was a welcome surprise.

“Ah, jeez guys!” You laughed out, the Feisty Four being quick to embrace you. It was nice to know you had been missed, even if you were gone for only a day.

“Good to see you’re alright, rookie.” Moray spoke out, being the first to detach from the group hug. Ace followed suit, readopting his stoic demeanour as he added,

“Not that we didn’t have any *faith* in you.” After some of your missions with him, you were surprised that he did. Ed eventually let go of you, picking up Mooch by the back of her collar as she tried fiddling around in your pockets.

“We were just worried is all.” Ed replied before giving Mooch a dirty look as he placed her down gently.

Home hadn’t changed since you’d left of course, still as vibrant and hot and dry as always. Despite the lustre and elegance that you had been met with at Waterfall, being home and safe felt all the more radiant. You felt a hand get gently placed on your shoulder, Star approaching from behind. 

“No need to worry. They had the best Sheriff in town to keep them safe!” He beamed out. For all it was worth, he wasn’t lying. If it weren’t for his quick thinking, and knowledge of Waterfall, then you would probably have been captured, or killed-

“Yes of course.” You heard the calmer voice call out from behind the crowd of the Feisty Four. “Glad to see that you are both still in one piece.” Ceroba joined the small group with a calm expression. She looked the same as always, perfectly dressed and groomed. You watched as she turned to give North Star a quaint smile, yet she only nodded at you.

“I think this calls for a round of drinks, right boss?” Ed asked, tipping his eyebrow at Star who nodded in agreement.

“Sound’s good to me, Ed. Let’s celebrate another victory.”

“And the rookie will be paying for all of us!” Mooch spoke out as she held out your pouch of gold which she had keenly swindled from your pockets. That bastard! The cunning thing squirmed out of grasp before you could grab her.

“Hey! Give that back!” You chased after her as she ran into the bar, the others following close behind.

-

The saloon's chatter was a wall of sound hugging around every part of you, oppressive and overwhelming. Yet, its thick presence left no room for intrusion, left no room for your awkward sighs and light breaths to be heard as you remained slumped on the edge of an ongoing conversation. Chatter this wild allowed for some sort of anonymity that you were otherwise lacking.

The Feisty Five, plus Ceroba and yourself, had been chatting about the excursion for quite some time now, with North Star painting quite the elaborate and dramatic picture of your adventure;

“But then, the *leader* of the Royal Guard came runnin’ at us! She had this look in ‘er eye, I knew it was bad business then. But thankfully-” The flourish he added always had you delighting in much of his charm. Sewn within each word was this giddy tone in his voice, the bravado of the tapestry he weaved was magnetising to watch. Yet, having been there yourself to experience the real thing, his tale was a large stretch of the truth.

You had wanted to help recount, but instead found yourself sitting silent by the edges, simply watching as North Star worked at the theatrics, miming actions, putting on voices. You were too enthralled by the mere sight of him to even interject with your own remarks. This feeling- it was dense and tight and pulled at you every which way, yet you indulged in it all the same. You liked him, more than the average friend. But if you found your tongue caught every time you were with him, with *everyone*, how could you ever make your feelings known?

Not even a couple hours ago talking had felt so easy, the words slipping off your tongue like the rapids that rushed beside you as you spoke. You had pinned him down, punched him, laughed with him, yet now it was all too much? Others were watching, yes, but shouldn’t the company mask the need to indulge in your own fluster?

Ceroba was making a comment on the events of North Star’s retelling as you elbowed him lightly in the side, just enough to get his attention;

“I’m gonna get some air for a bit.” You whisper, before shifting off your seat to leave out of the Saloon’s back door. Hopefully he’d follow, and you could be alone again to be playful with him without the fear of being seen. Or even worse, understood.

You felt the Saloon door swing shut behind you, the air out here was, although still just as hot, far less stuffy than the hive that throbbed within the Saloon’s walls. Out the back there was a small, rickety patio made of wooden planks with a couple of stairs that led down to the sandy ground beneath. A faucet jutted out of the wall though it wasn’t functional and probably never had been. You went to sit on the stairs, feeling the wooden boards wheeze beneath the weight; weathered and old. Down the far side of the back of the bar, there were a couple barrels of what you assumed to be rum strewn about.

The outside air was fresher, less anonymous, yes, but it gave you the space to clear your head. The space to not let your emotions take you over. 

Taking a deep breath in, you felt the warm air shift in your lungs. Exhaling, you dragged out all of the tension in your shoulders, your back. It could have just been aches from your prior adventure, or it could be something more-

A calm breeze washed by, sending a couple of tumbleweeds floating with it. Stumbling over one another in a chance to make haste to who knows where. Objects without purpose travelling onward. They were like you at one point in time. Making a journey to a place you would never see again. It was useless, really, when you thought about it. Even if you *wanted* to leave, you couldn’t. So maybe it was good that you liked Star, liked him this much to change the entire trajectory of your life to stay *here*. Your new home.

This was the best choice for you, right?

Suddenly, you heard the Saloon door squeak on its hinges as it was forced agape.

“Need some company?” You heard the mellow voice speak out.

“Sure, Ceroba.” You responded, too lost in your thoughts to turn your head to her. 

She gladly took the reply, shifting down next to you on the wooden planks. The wind that rolled by shifted through her locks of hair. They looked like tendrils as they brushed through the wind. Even sitting she was elegance personified.

“I was hoping to hear *your* side of the story. I know Star’s dramatic tendencies all too well.” You heard the smirk in her voice, and turned to see it for yourself. A strange sight it was, but a welcome one. You had seldom seen Ceroba even frown, such levels of expression were rather abnormal for you to be privy to. You sighed out, thinking of where to start, “Long day?”

“Yes-” You nodded, leaning your chin on your hand as you started.

“We don’t have to talk about it then-” You felt her shift, but it was smooth, and lacked the jagged edges of awkwardness. Despite your *state*, she was still effortlessly comfortable in your presence.

A silence settled between you, one that was far more comfortable than that which you had shared with some of the others. All you needed was the sound of the wind and the muffled chatter to keep you company. Though, there was a part of you, the same nagging voice that felt oh-so oppressive earlier in the bar, that wanted to ask her about him. North Star had said they were best friends, since childhood no less. Had he spoken about you? Or were you nothing but a passing remark in their conversations?

“North Star took me to this hidden place when we were running from the Royal Guard. At least, I *think* it was the Royal Guard.”

“Oh so the bit about you and Star getting chased by Undyne was all made up?” You weren’t sure who that was, a Royal Guard evidently.

“I like to think of it as a bit of flourish rather than an outright lie.” You let out a small chuckle, an exhale that showed the playfulness of your tone while your face could still remain stagnant. “It was this small area, with a bench and an Echoflower. We had to tread on these weird flowers to get there. It was like nothing I had ever seen!” 

“Oh, did you check under the bench?” The mentioning of this secret spot seemed to catch her attention, she had turned to you, looking at you more directly.

“Uh, no?” 

“Oh.” She retreated a bit in her tone, “Maybe next time?” You saw her flash a smile. A rare smile. One’s that feel like secrets shared between first loves, only you were barely even friends. 

“Maybe. Why should I be checking under there?”

“Oh, it’s just an inside joke- When I used to take Star there as a kid, sometimes there’d just be- oh, well I won’t spoil the surprise.” And just like that, the moment went sour. Those moments with Star had felt like they were *yours*. Yours to ponder over and to turn around in your head obsessively like you had done mere moments ago. But that wasn’t *your* place, this was North Star and Ceroba’s place, wasn’t it?

“Ah, yes, he told me you took him there.” You could feel your tone fall flat, losing its initial flighty underbelly, skinned of its lighthearted tone. “You’ve known each other for a long time, huh?” You asked, not really directing the question towards her. Rather it just reaffirmed the brewing feeling that tripped in your stomach. It wasn’t as painful as jealousy, no. This was the solemn poison of doubt.

“Yes. Pretty much since I was born. I guess as friends, I never really outgrew him.” Hm, that wording struck you as strange. The feeling in your stomach only got hungrier for info;

“As friends?” You asked, knowing the road this would lead down. You didn’t want to dislike her. You didn’t- Ceroba had kindly come out to check on you after you randomly departed from the group. How could you dislike someone like that? Yet, envy was a powerful thing that battled for control over your logic, appealing rather to the jury of the heart.

“Well, there was a point in time where-'' She stopped herself, almost as if she had been paused by some outside force. And then, just like that, they had pressed play, and she had snapped out of whatever stupor that overcame her. “You don’t really want to hear this, do you?” She asked, eyebrows downturned.

“Why do you say that?” Perhaps even with the coolness of the outside air, your emotions hadn’t simmered down, and your face had failed your intentions, ringing out doubt and envy on all of its features.

“You like him, don’t you?” Oh.

“I- what?” She met your reply with a knowing smile.

“You do!” She beamed with glee, pointing a light but accusatory finger your way. 

You stammered an excuse, waving your hands to fan off her presumptions. But it was too late, this spark had been fanned into a wildfire, and there was no way that the stream of words that left your lips could ever put it out. As your attempts slowly faltered, you felt a dewy warmth emanate beneath your clothing, sticking to your skin as your face fell hot.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay. I won’t tell.” She placed a reassuring hand on your shoulder, but the act was dampened by the fact that she still wore a smirk on her face. “I just wanted to confirm some suspicions. Glad to know I was right.” Her face shifted into a smile, and you calmed your panic.

“How could you tell?” You asked. She had read you so easily! Were you that open of a book that this near-stranger could tell your feelings. And who else knew?

“Ah, I always have fun watching the gang do their missions. I was quite keen to watch you when you first joined. I see the way you look at him.” She leant back on her hands, staring out to the vast horizon of the Dunes, “I thought at the very least, it was in admiration. But I started to suspect that it was something more after I heard all the names Star calls you.” She giggled, and you looked down at your lap where your hands sat clasped in dismay. “ “Darlin’” seemed to have you gasping for air a couple of times. It is quite amusing to watch.” You had assumed this whole time that the passionate inner feelings you harboured were nothing more than swells of the mind, yet instead they chose to manifest visually, giving you away.

“Well, I guess you’ve got me all figured out then?” You responded, sighing heavily as you tried to let go of the embarrassment. 

“I wouldn’t say that. I just know that you like him, is all. I don’t know *why* you like him, though I have my suspicions. And other than that, I hardly know anything else about you. North Star has talked to me more about you than I have talked *with* you.” I suppose that was true. You had heard more about Ceroba than seen. You had heard more about her whole life than seen it; Her husband, some chatter here and there about a daughter. Where were they now?

“What kind of things is he saying about me?” You ask hesitantly. She giggled and you shot her an angered look.

“Ah, sorry, sorry. This just reminds me of when I was a kid, a little.” She chuckled.

“Why’s that?”

“Ah you know, asking your crush’s friends about what they think of you, gossip and all that. Talking behind others’ backs. It’s all a bit childish but it's something I enjoy for its nostalgia all the same.”

“You calling me childish?”

“Aren’t we all?” The response was befitting of everything you had encountered in the Wild East so far; this large game of pretend that strung out over weeks, the playful yet meaningless back and forths of the Feisty Five’s banter, your conversation right now with Ceroba. It was all quite childish. But maybe that’s what you needed right now.

“Anyway, to answer your question, he’s only said good things, so don’t get hung up on that.” That was a relief, after everything you had sacrificed to stay here in the Wild East, the last thing you needed was the driving force behind that decision to turn sour on you. “He sees a lot of potential in you. You seem quite eager to do well for him, and you’re brave enough to try all the crazy things that he asks of you. He admires that” This made you smile. Of course it did-

“Good to hear that my dedication is paying off.” In response to this, she shifted in her place, turning a little towards you.

“So, why do you like him?” She asked before slinking back in slight embarrassment, “Now I’m being childish.” You decide to feed into the gossip, the two of you giggling at how silly the whole conversation was.

“Hm, well, he is quite the character. There is a lot to go over really.” You held your chin in contemplation; “He is rather attractive, that’s for sure.”

“Shallow.” She mumbled out before chuckling.

“Okay, okay! There are more reasons than that!” You slap her playfully on the arm, “He’s really patient with everyone's abilities. I feel like he doesn’t expect too much of everyone. Even if I suck at something, I never feel shitty about it when I’m around him.”

“There was a time where he was pretty bad at all of this.” Ceroba responded, gesturing with her pawed hands, “When he was younger, and first got attached to human culture, he’d go out into his yard every day and practice lasso-ing his dad while he worked.” Now it truly felt like gossip. Now you truly felt like friends.

“Oh god- That sounds painful. But in the most endearing way possible-” Star sounded like quite the hoot, even as a kid. Maybe even before he got ensnared with all the Wild West stuff.

“What was North Star like as a kid?” You asked her, hoping that the mentioning of the past would be a welcome topic. Ceroba seemed to be one to indulge in nostalgia.

“Ah, very different from how he is now. He was just as well meaning, but not as bold or brash.” You listened intently, and Ceroba couldn’t help but laugh at your heightened interest, “Not sure how much I can tell you without Star trying to kill me. He tries his best to look cool for you.” The remark had your mind buzzing with glee. He tried to look cool for you- What a dork. What a loveable dork! “I can tell you that he was a lot quieter, more contemplative and a bit bored with life. I guess that’s why he latched onto human culture so much. It’s hard to live a satisfying life down here. Guess he needed some excitement.” Her gaze turned to look pointedly at you. There was no smirk on her face, just pure contemplation. “Maybe that’s one reason why he’s latched onto *you* so much.”

You hoped not, as it rang rather shallow in comparison to the depths of your own feelings for him. Seeing your slightly pained expression, Ceroba quickly added, “Not the only reason, of course. I have heard many reasons.” You tried to smile appreciatively at the response.

“Do you think I have a chance?” You mumbled, feeling your heart’s pace quicken, its vibration’s thrumming.

“A chance with him?” Her expression was like nothing you’ve ever seen. Trying to decipher its parts, it seemed like a mixture of reassurance and something more painful. Something you couldn’t read into any further, your shovel of inference hitting a rock. “Well, I’m almost certain you do.” She added, turning away, her expression unchanging.

“You think so?” Your tone is careful yet still injected with the characteristic flightiness of joy. This was everything you had wanted to hear, afterall!

“Y-yeah.” She sighed out, her gaze astray, “He really appreciates having you around. I don’t think he’ll ever willingly let you leave.” She chuckled, but it was faint and flat and her eyebrows downturned only helped the playful tone run off into the thick summer air.

“I don’t plan on leaving anytime soon, if I can help it.” You reassure her. You couldn’t leave Star, nor the Feisty Five. And now you had another person you couldn’t leave. Even if the moment had soured, Ceroba seemingly plagued by something, you still considered her a friend. Still gossiped with her as if you were still a child. As if you were still innocent. That was worth staying for, on top of everything.

“Yeah.” Was all she said, her shoulders sinking with her words. Another silence settled as you fumbled with your own hands. “Just- Just make sure not to get too attached.” She mumbled out before standing up, and heading back inside without a word. 

And just like that, you were left alone once more. Only now, not even the air could carry with it the anonymity afforded to you prior. 

Now, everyone could see you.

***

“Whatcha doin’ out here all by yerself, deputy?”

“Just got a bit heated in there. That’s all.”

“Ah well, hope you don’t mind my company. I’ve missed havin’ you in there with me.”

“I have hardly been out here long!”

“Ah well, guess I’m just gettin’ too attached to you is all.”

“Haha… Yeah. Me too.”

[transgender-daemon-faerie]

Majority of the people in the fandom excuse what rhysand, feyre, and cassian do because they have trauma. People excuse rhysand sexually abusing feyre under the utm cause its what he "had" to do. Forcing someone to wear revealing clothing is sa. Forcing someone to dance suggestively on you is sa. Forcibly kissing someone, while they are trying to push you off, is sa. Guess, what he didn't have to do those things. Feyre destroying a whole court to get back at, leaving tens of thousands as refugees and contributing to the summer court being attacked, is excused. Cassian destroying a whole village to get back at the men who hurt his mother and also leaving refugees is excused. Twinies for real.

People still want to know what happens and see nesta. A lot of them also have others characters they like.

Nesta holds it against elain that she didn't do the same her even though nesta was there for elain. It's more a nuanced situation.

Nesta was nasty to cassian because cassian has ALWAYS been nasty to Nesta from the get go. Cassian doesn't respect her boundaries, thoughts, feelings, or opinions. He continues to say that's bullshit whenever Nesta says something he doesn't like. He continued to follow her home when she told him multiple times to leave her alone. He brought her father, who she witnessed murdered, just because she wasn't eating. Says he doesn't understand how her sisters love her just because she wants to be left alone. He yells at her in public because she doesn't want to do the whole mate thing even though she was one human and still hates the fae which is valid given the fact the fae oppresses the humans. Cassian doesn't accept that she doesn't want him when he continues to not leave her alone. He is supposed to be her mate but for some reason, he doesn't act like one. Allowing people around him to degrade and threaten nesta is not mate behavior.

People don't just hate rhysand for how he treats nesta. Its what he did to feyre utm, how he treats mor, how he doesn't do anything for those that are suffering in hewn city or illyria, and how he is written (badly. Not everything he does needs to be excused or justified). In regards to nesta, people hate rhysand for how he treats Nesta because he continues to disregard Feyre's feelings. Of wanting to have a relationship with her sister and telling him to stay out of it. Rhysand contributes to nesta not wanting to be around feyre which makes feyre sad but he, nor the ic, realize that and just blame nesta in reality, they play a big part.

That was not an intervention. Degrading someone, threatening them, judging their coping mechanisms is not an intervention. Forcing someone to leave in a place where they can't leave is abuse. We learned that with tamlin. Controlling how someone spends their days is abuse. Nesta wasn't struggling with addiction with her not having withdrawals.

Wooooooaahhh. I touched a nerve. My bad.

I’m going to try to address all the things you said. Before I start, I have autism so I’m a little bad with tone. So I want to clarify that, on my end at least, this is a friendly discussion and not an attack in the least.

I’m not saying that Nesta should be hated for what she did. I’m saying that the other characters shouldn’t be expected to forgive and forget.

I already made a post about morally grey characters and how the fandom doesn’t seem to understand what that means. Nesta is a morally grey character. She does good and bad things. She’s a little fucked up. But we still love her. I feel the same way about Rhys, Cassian, Feyre, Mor, and the others. Cassian murdered people, that’s bad. Mor used Cassian. That’s bad. Rhys did several fucked up things to Feyre. That was bad. Feyre collapsed an entire society (spring court) that was bad. But all of these characters also do good things. They’re morally grey.

I agree that the situation between Nesta and Elain is nuanced

If you really hate Rhys that much, I genuinely cannot understand how you enjoy reading this series. He’s a pretty major character.

That was 100% an intervention. Sometimes people say not nice things at interventions. It’s an emotionally charged situation. People get put in Rehab after an intervention, and they cannot leave until they get better. Nesta had to go to Magic Rehab ™️. Alcoholism is an addiction. Nesta was 100% an alcoholic. She had a mental and emotional dependence on a substance to the point that she could not function properly without it. We see that in that her mental health episodes immediately get worse upon arrival in the house of wind.

[ladyof1000masks]

So about the Fable reboot...

People (Fable fans) are being really fucking shitty to me because I have an unpopular opinion. I'm not trying to be a bitch, I mean no disrespect to the devs of the reboot, I fully plan on giving the game a chance, etc. If I don't get my way I'm not going to attack or harass the developers like the absolute fucking toilet sponges on Youtube attacked and harassed the trans-fem environmental artist for being the reason the PC is "ugly."

All of this because I believe that Fable isn't Fable without the world-building (historical characters and history) established in Fable The Lost Chapters and expanded on by "Tales of Albion" should be included in the reboot. I've clarified what I mean numerous times and somehow they're still misconstruing/twisting my words. I don't want or expect the base world-building to be 1:1, I fully expect and hope that they will evolve the source material.

All I want is the Old Kingdom, the Void, William Black, the Court mostly Jack of Blades to exist in the reboot. If Playground can't include it at the bare minimum then they should have made their own IP instead of skinning Fable's corpse and wearing it.

I see everyone saying Fable isn't Fable without "the moral choices," "British Humor, life-sim mechanics, good/evil morphing, etc" but they never include world-building.

A fantasy world heavily depends on its lore (history and historical characters), usually from the source material it's based off, to have a distinct identity. I play the Elder Scrolls series, not only for the features, but for the story, characters and lore which allows me to invest and immerse myself in a unique living world I can't get anywhere else. No other fantasy world is the same.

It's the same for Fable. Even if it has all the gameplay and humor of the originals, without the basic history of William Black, the Old Kingdom, the Court, and the void, it will never be Fable. Fable is its humor, its gameplay, its features, its lore/history and its historical characters. You can't extract one of these and still call it Fable which is why it baffles me as to why so few people care about the base lore. You say you want a Fable game, but you're okay with history, historical characters, and world-building being completely gutted?

That IS the source material. Do you mean to tell me the Fable reboot is still Fable without Fable? That's like saying a bologna sandwich is still a sandwich without bread.

 I expect Fable to be everything and have everything (to a certain point) from the originals but improved and evolved. As a writer, why the fuck would you wipe out pre-existing world-building and basic history to start completely anew? Firstly, you're creating a lot more work for yourself as well as increasing development time and costs.

 Finally, why wouldn't you evolve/improve the base world construct and adapt what already exists to make it yours? The base material has so much untapped potential that was never realized or properly explored. The Court and even Jack of Blades by himself were never utilized satisfactorily. Jack needed more development.

Motherfucker was the big bad (twice) and not only was he barely in the game, there was almost zero setup until near the tail end. "Surprise, bitch! It was me all along! Suck the end of my sword." There is SO much. I don't expect everything to happen exactly the same or characters not to be altered. To be clear, I don't expect any lore after TLC's base history and historical characters. So I don't expect the story of Fable ​1-3 (fuck Fable the Journey) to be reflected in the reboot.

[watching-pictures-move]

Viddying the Nasties | The Beyond (Fulci, 1981)

Ten or so years ago I gave myself a little project on my blog to explore and write about the Video Nasties, and The Beyond was the first movie I picked. I remember going to the video store I was frequenting at the time, where they had a cheeky post-it on the cover of the Grindhouse Releasing DVD they kept on their shelves. “Brought to you by National Geographic!” That place still luckily still exists, and I actually dropped by recently and spent an irresponsible amount of money, although I didn't drop by that back part of the store where I remember it being displayed. Perhaps that post-it is still there, enticing wayward horror movie fans lured in by the promise of that post-it. Like many others, I was blown away by this at the time and it's grown to be a personal favourite, likely because it's at least somewhat integral to my growth as a horror movie fan.

I'm sure this movie's been written about to death, but one of the reasons that I love this so much is that it feels like a convergence of two schools of horror, of the implicit and the explicit. Of atmosphere and suggestion, and grisly, punitive violence, exemplified most strongly in the scene where Cinzia Monreale and her trusted canine companion find themselves alone in a shadowy house, stricken with fear, only for mysterious figures to appear out of nowhere, unnerving in their blocking. The irrational becomes literal without the sense of dread being diluted. Even the violence carries this this tension, both grisly enough to sate any gorehound, but almost surreal in rendering bodily destruction as a clash of textures, the way the man's face is stretched in different directions as spiders gnaw at his lips, his tongue, and Fulci's favourite target, his eyes.

When compared to the other Bad Boy of Italian horror, Fulci's violence seems blunt, messy, while Argento's seems precise, choreographed. (I should clarify that I mean Bad meaning Good. Bad meaning Bad would be either Bruno Mattei or Ruggero Deodato, depending on if you're referring to quality or ethics.) I think of Argento painting with fine brushstrokes and Fulci painting with broad ones. I think of Argento rendering his violence through colour and movement, and Fulci through texture and stillness. I used to be annoyed that the characters in Fulci's films froze up during the gore scenes, but perhaps such reactions are easier to excuse once you accept that these characters are petrified in the face of the irrational, of things they have never seen and cannot comprehend.

This has the spine of a movie where characters are investigating the supernatural, but with the beats shuffled around so they don't quite make sense. The evil in this movie operates according to a logic known only to itself, and kept hidden from us. And it dismantles the rules of our physical, literal reality. Night and day collapse into one, locations across the city collapse into close proximity, and the barrier between hell and our plan dissolve, and fog envelopes all. This should earn you a lot of stamps on your foggy movie punchcard, but should you finally get that submarine sandwich, maybe don't eat it during this movie.

So this is maybe not a terribly comforting film, but I always like spending time in it. This operates according to the same punitive nightmare logic as City of the Living Dead, and is maybe not as aggressively free-associative as that one in its rhythms (that movie is possibly the closest a movie has come to capturing the feel of one of my nightmares), but the wider wiiiiiiiiiiidescreen cinematography and the New Orleans locations give this an added lushness. And as I've said before, Italian horror is my comfort food and seeing these actors again and again, especially with rewatches, is like spending time with my friends. I enjoy hanging out with Catriona McColl and David Warbeck, who bring a nice lived-in quality to their performances. And I find myself moved by the relationship between Cinzia Monreale, who brings a delicacy and poignancy that contrasts interestingly with the dread surrounding her, and her adorable little, okay pretty big, dog. So there is warmth in this movie if you look for it.

[queer-irritator]

A New Neighbor | Kratos x GN! Reader | Chapter 18

Content Warnings: Adult language

Word Count: 773

Chapter 17

A/N: Welcome to the (probably) final chapter! I want to thank you all for how much love and support I’ve gotten on this story! There may be an epilogue in the future, I just can’t promise a timeline at the moment!

----------------------------------------------------------------

You could feel Kratos melt into your kiss; his lips began to move against yours. You couldn’t stop the smile that made its way onto your face as you kissed the man you’ve become so fond of. But your smile soon dissipated when you felt Kratos pull away from you and place his hands on each of your shoulders as he stood up. 

“You do not want this.” Kratos told you.

Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion. 

“Yes, I do.” You argued. 

“No.” Kratos stated as he took a step away from you. 

“You… You can’t tell me how to feel.” You persisted.

“I am not good.” He insisted, looking away from you.

Your confusion only grew. You were searching his face for any type of hint that this was a joke.

“What?” You took a few steps back to sit back down on your bed.

“You should go.” Kratos suggested, but it sounded more like a demand.

“What the fuck? No!” Your voice raised slightly with your last word. 

Kratos turned his head to you. 

“Can you please talk to me?” You pleaded with him, but annoyance still prevalent in your voice. 

“You should go.” He repeated himself, but more sternly this time.

It felt like your heart was starting to crack. 

“No.” You told him, your voice almost a whisper. 

You stood up and took a step forward, “You are a good man, Kratos. You are a wonderful father and protector. A loyal friend. You are kind and selfless.” You explained to him. 

“You do not know me.” Was his only reply. 

“Then tell me. Tell me why you’re such a bad person so I can decide for myself if I want to leave or not.” You crossed your arms. 

Kratos glanced at you. If you weren’t going to heed his warnings, the truth would surely have you running. 

“I am a monster. A killer.” He began to confess.

“Kratos, we all kill those monsters-“ you were cut off.

“People. Innocent people, children, villages.” He elaborated. 

“What are you talking about?” This doesn’t sound like the man you’ve come to know. 

“My past.” Kratos clarified. 

“Our pasts don’t define who we are now.” You tried to explain to him. 

“I am… irredeemable.” He slowly sat on his bed. 

You let out a sigh and took a step closer to him, “No one is irredeemable… Tell me about it.” 

Kratos had confusion spread across his face. You should have been gone by now, horrified that he was capable of such acts and calling him a monster. You sat next to him and placed a hand on his shoulder.

“Tell me about it.” You repeated yourself, guiding him back so he was laying down. 

“I wanna hear.” You coaxed him on, lying next to him on your side on the tiny bed. 

Kratos was looking at you, debating in his head what to say next.

You placed a hand on his chest, “I’m not going to leave.” You assured him. After a few moments of silent debating, Kratos spoke. 

“I am a god.”

You had spent the entire night listening to Kratos tell you about his life. How the greed of war overtook him, becoming enslaved by Ares, then being consumed in hate and a need for vengeance. He had just finished telling you of the journey he and Atreus took to scatter Faye’s ashes. 

All the candle wax had melted into a puddle long ago, and the light from the window signaling daytime had emerged. You took a few minutes in silence to think over everything he had told you. You shifted to raise your head and look into his eyes.

“You are a good man, Kratos.” Your voice was stern, ready to shoot down any protests Kratos came up with. 

But none came. 

He nodded his head the slightest bit, you would have missed it if you blinked. You nodded back at him and leaned closer to his face and pressed a kiss to his lips. 

It took Kratos a moment, but he kissed you back and lightly placed a hand on the side of your face. His touch was so gentle, like those same hands hadn’t torn apart draugr like they were a piece of paper. 

You reluctantly pulled away from the kiss as you heard some commotion coming from the main room. “Well, now you can touch my butt and not feel weird about it.” You poked fun at him as you got out of his bed. 

An annoyed grumble was music to your ears.

You smiled to yourself as you exited the bedroom to see what was going on, feeling a new chapter of your life begin.

[hargrove-mayfields]

The bus always drops Billy off exactly a block from home. They took his car when he failed a vision test from his chronic migraines, so there isn’t much of a choice. Which is fair. He really doesn’t want to drive anyways after his accident. But, the bus isn’t always on time.

He’d been visiting Max at the hospital to play catch up before the new year. There’s always a good excuse to go visit her, but today especially. There’s fireworks going off like crazy from all the drunk hicks celebrating the passing of another year. Fireworks that terrify Max because she can’t even see them, after losing her vision in the battle for her life.

He’s lucky he got out of the hospital earlier that night because Max requested an extra strong dose of her meds to drown out the sound of the fireworks.

Unfortunately, there’s too many of those same drunks to cart around that the bus hadn’t made its way to the hospital until an hour after it was supposed to pick him up. He’d meant to be home by 9, but it’s already after 10.

Even on his eventual walk home from the bus stop, drawn out by his limp and his cane, the sky is full of smoke and colors. And noise. Lots and lots of irritating, terrifying noise.

Billy walks the last stretch faster than he should. He’s eager to get home to Steve for their first new year together anyhow. He’ll blame it on that instead of the lick of fear in his stride from the booming.

Right away as he shoulders the door open on his good side, the one not leaning on a cane, he calls out into the house, expecting Steve to be right there since he’s running a little late, “Baby?”

But there’s no answer. That’s not so unusual. They’re usually in bed by now anyways, aged at least three decades by the events of two summers ago and basically every day since. He’ll just hang up his coat, kick off his stretchy old man shoes, and try again.

“Steeeevie?”

Still nothing.

One too many times panicking from not knowing Steve’s exact location has taught him to calm down a little, and get his head on the right way before he starts tearing the place apart looking for him. Taking his time so as not to hurt himself in the process, Billy decides to go upstairs and check before he makes the ruling that Steve’s MIA. For his sanity.

He finds his boyfriend disguised as a pile of blankets on their bed, and he almost misses him because the lights are all out.

Right.

Fireworks are pretty rough for Steve too. Nothing brings more sensory overload than colorful death bombs in the sky. Billy sighs. He hates this town and the constant cacophony of fear it brings. Can’t they ever have a moment of peace?

He climbs into bed next to Steve, announcing his presence with a clearing of his throat before he plops down next to the curled up figure under the comforter.

“What’re you doing in here?”

The quiet response from Steve comes out barely audible, “Hiding.”

Yeah. Billy kinda wishes he could hide from a lot of things too. But right now, this is not about him,

“What from?”

The blankets rustle and a small mumbled response comes, “Loud.”

Just to be sure, and so Steve doesn’t have to do as much talking, Billy clarifies, “The fireworks are too loud?”

Again, there’s a shifting sound of Steve’s hair against the sheets, as he nods gently.

Billy wants to hold him. He’d like to strike down every last motherfucker that made Steve feel like this too. He can settle for lifting up the blanket and sliding under it with Steve, and talking gently to try and soothe him.

“I think so too. They uh.. remind me of..”

His voice breaks off from the quiet whisper into just nothing. Even now, even trying to be strong for Steve, there are some things that are too hard to talk about.

Steve’s face goes scrunched up with sympathy. Like he’s trying hard on purpose to feel bad for Billy, though that’s not really how it goes in his head. He even apologizes, though that isn’t what Billy wanted at all, “I’m sorry.”

Instantly, Billy rushes to reassure him, “Stevie, you didn’t-“

But it doesn’t change what Steve was already determined to tell him. They don’t talk a lot about the serious things. About how they’re both disabled now, and certainly both jam-packed with more trauma than the sky is packed with lights tonight. Maybe they should, so Steve won’t sound as guilty as he speaks,

“I’m sorry I’ve always been like this and you were made into this.”

That makes Billy pause. He has to catch his breath and then turn on his side to look at Steve’s face, centering on his nose so accidental eye-contact won’t happen.

No way is he letting Steve blame himself for this, any of this.

“That’s not true. I hated fireworks before too. We’d watch them on the beach, and I’d get scared because the water looked like it was on fire.”

Just from that tidbit, Steve tears up. Billy tears up. They both know what part of the story is coming next, and suddenly Billy remembers that he told this story before and simply forgot, but it’s too late to stop now.

“Momma held me and told me that it wasn’t real, but.. after momma left.. I was always afraid of irrational shit like that. Still am. Just today I was scared the hospital would burn up from the fireworks if I left Max there. Or I’d choke on the smoke on my way home. And then I got back and I couldn’t find you and I just-“

Yeah. Steve gets it. They’re both trying their damndest, even when another pop sounds in the near distance, and Steve presses his headphones a little closer to his ears.

The not quite silence speaks more volumes than their words. Steve spreads his arm out, and makes a soft little humming sound. An invitation for Billy to come close and wrap his arms around Steve. They need each other right now.

Billy dives into the offered cuddle. He’s been waiting for this moment all day. The moment where he could just sob into Steve’s chest, and feel Steve’s own tears wetting his hair. Sometimes, this is what it takes.

Laying in bed and purging out all their bad emotions isn’t exactly the ideal way for two ex-King’s like them to spend their New Year’s Eve, but it’s how they’re going to, and neither would ask for any other way to move into another year. They fought hard to be able to do that.

Nobody can take that away.

They don’t talk again until Steve is ready. With all the noise and chaos, Billy doesn’t mind the silence, just listening to Steve’s steady, unsteady, one-two-skip, heartbeat. He hears Steve’s words rattle up in his chest as he speaks them, “Fireworks are stupid.”

That makes Billy crack a smile. They both know all this crying isn’t about the fireworks. Not that it helps, but that’s not the point.

Maybe fireworks will be the spark that lit the fire. From now on, it’s about opening up a little more.

“Yeah. What’s so great about all that toxic shit in the air anyways?” Billy meant that in more ways than one, but whether or not Steve got the double meaning about all that glory covering up the ugly truth, isn’t what he focuses on.

Steve lingers on the idea of the bad air, and Billy’s asthmatic lungs, and lets the worry come back, “I didn’t even think about that. You okay?”

Billy nods against Steve’s chest, and pulls back a little so his head is resting by his arm instead, and they’re face to face now, “I’m just fine.”

It’s such an automatic answer, Steve catches it too. Satisfied that he noticed, he points out, “You sound just like Max.”

He does. It feels like it’s already been an eternity since he got back in Steve’s arms. He forgot that today was the same day he visited Max. His memories get mixed up like that sometimes.

The silence after Steve’s little teasing must eat away at Billy’s mask, because Steve makes a small sound of worry, like a gruff sniffle, and asks, “Was she okay?”

Trying hard to remember today’s visit over yesterday's or the day before's or nine months before that’s, Billy gives details by the moment he remembers them, “Still tired. But alright. Got her to smile.”

“Did you tell her-“ Every single day Steve asks the same questions. He cares so much about doing the right thing.

Seeing him now, all curled up in bed and sad on a day that’s a celebration for everybody else, makes Billy even more sure that he’s going to do the right thing as well. Right now, that’s reassurance,

“Yep, I said ‘hi from Steve.’ And I made sure to tell her you miss her. All the usual.”

“I’m sorry I couldn’t come.” Steve went once, and that was all it took for the constant beeping, rushing, wheeling, to trigger a meltdown. Never again.

But Billy’s alright with that, and Max was too the last time they talked, “Baby, we’ve told you. It’s fine. I can barely get my ass on the bus either.”

Steve doesn’t look like he believes him. His eyes are wide and teary again. His nails scratch at his palms, so Billy gently takes his hands and keeps them separated.

“Promise?”

Billy kisses Steve’s knuckles on each hand, soft and barely able to be felt as a graze across warm flesh. He’s going to do anything to make Steve stop worrying about the harder things they’ve been through a few times now.

“I promise.”

Billy reaches out slowly, ever so slowly so Steve has time to assert his boundaries before Billy's hand makes contact with his face. Instead of stopping him though, Steve blinks slowly and closes his eyes, and allows Billy to gently hold his cheek. His skin is flushed warm, despite it being so cold out. He’s the softest thing Billy’s ever had the privilege to hold.

Next he wants to taste. The angle they’re at is awkward and it hurts Billy’s back. He taps Steve’s cheek as a silent way of asking him to be the one to initiate their kiss and fix their tangle of limbs. Steve obliges, without opening his eyes, shifting off of his hip so his chest is against Billy’s now, and their faces are just inches apart.

Billy isn’t even sure which of them actually closes the gap, but in the next moment he’s kissing Steve slowly and carefully like either of them could break at any second.

In the next moment, Steve does break, only in that he separates the kiss.

“Wait a sec.”

Billy’s eyes are half open, his face warmed by the love he felt from the kiss, which left him too lax and calm to be worried about Steve’s interruption, “Hm?”

Not for no reason. Steve’s panic looks a lot different from his lightbulb ideas, and right now, Billy can tell before Steve even speaks it’s going to be the latter. One of his good ideas.

“We have to save up our kisses for midnight.”

Not exactly the most thrilling idea ever. Billy instinctually scrunches his nose as an expression of doubt, but Steve’s eyes are still shining with his own brilliance.

“I don’t know, babe..”

“It’s good luck!” Steve swears it like it’s a revelation, and he’s just cured all that ails Billy.

Seeing him that happy, instead of shaking and hiding from the overstimulation like earlier, Billy could say that Steve’s just about done that for real.

Billy plays his role as the skeptic though, pouting over-exaggeratedly so Steve knows he’s not serious, “Didn’t know that meant we had to wait.”

It earns a laugh, more akin to a delighted giggle, out of Steve, who decides on a compromise for their imaginary plight, “You can have one kiss on the cheek for now.”

He leans over and just barely pecks his cheek, soft lips ghosting over Billy’s skin and making him shiver with the feeling of goose pimples popping up on his neck. The small kiss transforms with the shape of Steve’s smile from Billy's reaction, and then Steve gives him another, slightly stronger, press of his lips.

“Thank you, Stevie.” Billy makes doubly-sure Steve knows he’s not really as pouty as he was playing to be. Really, any affection from Steve makes his entire day better, after months where they weren’t able to have these moments between doctors visits and monster battles. The peace of just being in one another’s arms, finally safe from all of that, is enough. “Love you.”

Declarations of love always give Steve a reason to show his happy hands. He taps the tips of his fingers in a rhythm against Billy’s collar bone, and returns the declaration in a silly, stimmy voice, “I love you too.”

Their bliss is interrupted by another thundering firework outside. A distressed squeak cuts off Steve’s words, and he buries his face into Billy’s form, hiding along the contour of his arm, with his face pressed against Billy’s ribcage, so he’s as close to Billy as possible, and as far away from the threat.

It’s not really a comfortable position, but if it keeps Steve feeling safe, Billy can live with a dead arm for a while.

“I got you, Steve. Those fireworks aren’t gonna get us, babe.”

“Too loud.” Steve repeats his sentiment from earlier. That’s a nice affirmation that this is all rational. They’ve both had their share of fear driven breaks, which are much harder to solve.

Since this one’s the kind that doesn’t scare Billy, he keeps joking with Steve to keep him from slipping into that worse place.

“Want me to sing for you? Drown it all out?” He questions, knowing full well he can’t hold a tune worth a damn.

“Please no.” Steve’s so polite about telling Billy what he already knew. It’s really sweet actually.

Billy chuckles lightly, suppressing his laugh so he doesn’t jostle Steve too much, “I hear you. We’ll just be nice and quiet then.”

After so long like that, without any more booming interruptions from outside of their safe spot, Billy’s eyes start to get heavy. He caught Steve the same way, blinking extra hard so his eyelashes danced over Billy’s skin, and so his eyes wouldn’t shut without him.

Normally he’d just let him sleep, and he considers it for a moment, but it’s the celebration of the new year, and Steve would be devastated if they missed the midnight kiss.

Billy realizes they’ve been laying here for so long, he doesn’t even know what time it is, “I’m gonna peek out of the blanket. Check the time.”

Steve doesn’t waste energy on responding beyond a simple nod.

Billy uses his free hand that isn’t under Steve to pull the heavy comforter back down to let the real world back in. His eyes take a moment to adjust to the room again, and then he squints at the clock to see how close they are to the moment.

“Oh shit. It’s 11:56. Only 4 minutes left.” He announces, and Steve pops up beside him from under the blanket eagerly, every bit of tiredness gone from his face and replaced with glowing excitement.

“Are we gonna count them down?”

Billy smiles and shrugs as much as he can with Steve’s weight still on his one arm, “Don’t see why not.”

They count the minutes down together quietly. That’s too long to do it out loud and wear Steve out before it’s even time. Their way of doing that consists of Billy laying still and letting Steve tap out each passing second against the scar in the center of his chest.

When they finally reach an achievable countdown, Billy starts with, “10.”

“9.” Steve takes the next, and they do it in alternating order, although from the way Steve is vibrating with excitement, he’d probably rather skip this step altogether

Still, Steve is so loving with him, even when Billy feels like he doesn’t deserve it.

“8.”

Billy would hold him through anything it took to make Steve feel safe expressing that kind of love.

“7.”

They fought so hard to be this comfortable. Last year, Billy was still in a coma, and Steve was still too scared to even touch him to hold hands.

“6.”

Their first kiss was two months after they started dating, leaning around stitches and big emotions to both finally feel like everything was in place.

“5.”

Someday, they’ll be totally in sync and know when those hard times have passed, but right now it’s a loving, tender work in progress.

“4.”

And maybe someday, they’ll get out of Hawkins, and far away from all the chaos here.

“3.”

Billy gets stronger every day, mentally and physically. Steve gets more in tune with his own needs and self-worth. That’s what a support system and a whole lotta care will do for a couple of guys like them.

“2.”

Most importantly, they’re getting better all the time at communicating, building up the foundations of their relationship.

“1!”

Steve initiates the kiss, grabbing both sides of Billy’s face and smashing their lips together rather than kissing him. It’s reminiscent of their first kiss, in all its clumsy, anxious glory. Billy thinks that’s a good momento to end the worst year of their lives with, and start into what will hopefully be the best.

“Looking forward to another year with you, baby.” He promises, when they break apart and finally get a breath.

Steve wears a delightful smile, “Here’s to another.. hm.. 100?”

That sounds nice. Just him and Steve for the rest of time, no matter how many years pass or how many painful explosions happen.

“Yeah. Cheers to that.”

[blueskyportrait]

hi hi, posting an ask to clarify a few things: apparently the budgets for v9 and the JL league were separate and the real reason for v9's delay was the transition to working at home at covid. i dont like spreading misinformation (good lord the rwby fanbase has enough of it already) so i think this was fair to bring up. while i dont doubt the validity of the animators who worked on v9 and the JL cross over, i can't help but to feel weary due to the fact that this is freaking roosterteeth. a company notorious for their abuse of animators to the point of disability, how their shows are produced on slave labour, how they abuse their starry eye fans for cheap labour, how the higher ups of the company are very much either incompetent or rotten to the core. how can i in good conscious give this company the benefit of the doubt that the JL crossover didnt went through the same crunch or workplace issues? sure the animators got more worked, but were you guys properly paid for it? arianna fillipini's twitlonger details the MASSIVE amount of crunch (50 hr/weeks), how the pay was still below industry standard, how the leadership in v9 didnt help the animators, how everyone got laid off cus RT taking away full time employment, and this was all during VOLUME 9. something produced in 2020-2021, not 5 years ago. im glad the animators got a year of work, im glad they had an opportunity to network with other artists. im not upset that the JL happened, im worried that the same crunch and workplace abuse from v9 was carried over as a consequences of these crossovers being developed in house. while its really dumb to knowingly spread misinformation of RWBY's budget and production, i cant help feel this uneasiness towards every rwby fan on twitter just taking their word that the JL was 'totally a good thing!!!' and anyone upset by how they assumed that the JL took away resources for v9 (because it happened to v6 with gray smuggling money for gen:lock) are 'stupid little haters who use the poor animators at cudgels to flame roosterteeth!!!' am i supposed to trust the notion that suddenly all of the decades workplace abuse and mistreatment that persisted to it's latest season all went away? that suddenly the animators were given enough time and compensation for their work? that suddenly management became leagues better? suddenly all of our concerns towards the production of RT's shows and RT as a company are nonsensical? idk, the entire thing is really weird and the uneasiness i have towards CRWBY's production isnt exactly alleviated by the fact that the JL had a seperate budget :P at least we got to see the beacon designs again 🥃

@unovaslankiite your concerns are completely valid and you're not wrong feeling this way. Even if the budgets for vol 9 and JL were separate, that doesn't make what the animators revelaed just last year what they've been through all go away. Ar*yn Tr*che (who I personally belive is an RT shill so they can keep their job) should not be treated as the only source of info. Their words mean nothing to me. Like, ok, the JL and vol 9 budgets were separate. That doesn't excuse the animation department having to work double time during covid. Yeah you want to ensure they got work, and yet they were snubbed of their overtime pay.

And you're right, why should any of us believe Rooster Teeth? They've been proven over and over again to be liars, and it really isn't hard to notice the patterns of behavior over the years. They said crunch issues in production have been resolved and that was a fucking lie. The cuts to vol 9 and the production of the JL movie sound very similar to what happened to vol 5 when Gen Lock was being made. So people are right to assume the crossover movie affected vol 9.

Pointing all of this out doesn't make you "a bad faith rwby critic" or "wanting to pin blame on crwby" as some stans like to accuse others of. People like you and I are not content with just taking Ar*yn and K*rry's words at face value so they can continue to bury the truth. The stans who try to convince themselves that MKEK and the vas of crwby are separate from RT just want to ease their guilty conscious in wanting to continue to consume rwby content.

That's why they spam #greenlightvol10 on every rwby related post they make. It's a sign of sheer copium.