#i shot him a text asking if he wanted to bake smth this weekend

[mars-ipan]

my brother’s gonna stay over for the weekend starting tomorrow and i think that’s gonna make me feel a lot better

[givemetherapyimawritingtravesty]

Hi! Way back when in your disability pride month post you mentioned you hc Logan w/ some depression and Finn with adhd. I'm adhd, and sometimes it causes issues with my friends with depression, when I am just SO much and they really can't handle so much. I was wondering if you'd write a fic about something along those lines and maybe leo just in the middle? And/or how they solve it (i.e, finn going for a run to get out energy or smth) i LOVED your logan h/c leo's depression and would love more!

Yes! Okay so disclaimer, this is based of my experiences with things similar to what anon is talking about.

Also, does this feature some Logan / Sirius bro-lationship because do I have another ask I’m working on about that? Maybe. Maybe. (Who am I kidding, definitely yes lol.)

I’m sorry this took soooo long to get out, but it’s long (like, over 2,700 words) and took a lot of time and energy and I haven’t had the energy or people points to deal with things lately. But finally, it is finished. (You may ask yourself, what are people points? Well, read on to learn what I mean lol. It's a real thing my friends and I use to express how we're feeling.)

Credit, as always, to the amazing @lumosinlove who created this universe and let's us play around with it!

CW for depression and anxiety references

Finn woke up very excited. He was so hyper; he could barely contain himself. He was practically vibrating with excitement for the day. He had been feeling a little cooped up the last few days, having a lazy weekend with his boys, watching movies on the couch. Today he was finally able to let out some of that pent up energy playing tennis with Kasey and Nat, who had only agreed to go last night when Leo suggested it after the whole day of Finn not being able to sit still for a single movie scene.

Finn sat up in bed, pulling his phone from the nightstand to check the time a shoot a quick text to Kasey to confirm that they were up and would be ready to meet at the courts in an hour.

He heard Leo start to rustle on the other side of their still sleeping boyfriend and thought it odd that Logan, ever the light sleeper, hadn’t moved yet. He reached down to grab his shoulder and shake him awake not exactly gently, being a little too excited for the day ahead.

Logan only groaned and roughly shifted away from the touch, pulling a pillow over his head.

Finn shot a questioning look over to Leo, who just shook his head and whispered, “Let him sleep in. He hasn’t been doing well the last few days, he probably just needs some rest.”

“Then who’s gonna help me beat Kase and Nat in doubles? You already had plans to help Celeste bake for Katie’s bake sale.” Finn pouted.

“Y’all’ll just have to play singles and switch out, I’m sure they won’t mind. Come on, lets get some coffee brewing.”

***

Leo, having already seen one boyfriend off to the gym, crawled back into bed and pulled the other into his bare chest.

Logan only sighed, snuggling closer into the warmth.

Leo soothed a hand through Logan’s hair, whispering, “I have to get ready to head over and help Celeste, are you gonna be alright by yourself today?”

Logan hesitated for a moment before nodding against Leo’s chest.

“Is it a bad one today?” Leo asked softly.

Logan took a shaky, deep breath and started to silently cry, nodding again. “I’m sorry.”

“No, don’t be sorry. It happens, alright? You’re alright darlin’. These last few days were hard, I know, and it’s okay. Do you want me to stay with you?”

Logan hesitated again before shaking his head. “Go. I think I’ll try to sleep it off a bit.”

Leo sighed, knowing that what Logan wanted was to be left alone for a bit. “Okay, but if you need anything… or me… just text, ‘kay? Just let me know what we can do.”

Leo sat there a few minutes, letting Logan settle down before getting up to head to the Dumias’.

When he got there, he let himself in and saw Sirius helping to wrangle the kids and keep them occupied playing ‘go fish’ while Celeste got the kitchen set up.

“Cap, hey, didn’t think you’d be here.” Leo let out a surprised chuckle.

“Just swung by for a visit while Re had to do some work at the rink.”

“Ah.” Leo continued to make his way to the kitchen, but then stopped and turned back to Sirius. “Hey. Um, could I have a word with you quick?”

“Oui, of course.” Sirius said, setting his hand full of cards and walking over. Right before he reached Leo, he turned around, “And no peeking at my cards!” He called back to the kids, who only giggled. “What’s up rookie? Am I in trouble?”

“No, no, of course no.” Leo let out a nervous laugh. “It’s just.” He sighed. “Lo. He’s… been having a rough go of it and… I don’t know. He stayed home today, and I know he won’t talk to me about what’s going on. I… you’re like a brother to him. He respects your opinion. Not that he doesn’t respect ours, it’s just…”

“Different?”

“Yeah. I… it’s been getting bad again. I think he should go see Heather, but he never wants to talk about it with us and… Could you talk to him maybe? I just…”

“Of course. Yeah, I wondered what was up when he missed team dinner Friday. I get it’s the off season and rest and all but, he never misses, unless he really not doing good, you know?” Sirius let out a heavy breath. “I mean, I’ve been there and… it sucks. I want to help him. Whatever I can. Just tell me.”

“You should say that to him, I’m sure he could use the support right now. This weekend… Finn was just bouncing off the walls, I don’t think he sat still long enough to really notice it. And then they were supposed to go play tennis today but- Lo really wasn’t up to it. He’s home, wanted some space. And I get that, I just wish… he’d, I don’t know. I don’t know.” Leo started to get a little choked up.

“Hey.” Sirius said, pulling him into a hug. “It’s okay. He’s hurting and that hurts. You can feel upset about it too.”

“But he’s the one…”

“Hey, non, don’t go down that rabbit hole. You can feel what you want without having to feel guilty about it. You support him the best you can and that takes a toll on you too.” Sirius said, holding Leo at arm’s length. “I mean… I know I’ve put Re through the ringer a few times trying to get me to calm down when the world starts to spiral. And he still has his days too when the world is too much handle and getting up is too much energy. But we get through it together. It’ll be okay, Knutty. I promise.”

Leo sniffled and ran a sleeve across his eyes. “Yeah. Thanks, Cap. You’ll talk to him?”

“Yes. I’ll give him a few hours to rest then shoot him a text and see what he’s up to, ouais? Now, Celeste had more ingredients than should be in one household, better go help her bake up a storm.” Sirius said, giving him a pat on the shoulder and a gentle nudge towards the kitchen.

***

Logan knew from the moment he woke up that it was going to be a rough day for him. He sat up slow, still groggy, and looked over at the clock. 11:47 am. Almost noon. He looked around the room to take in his surroundings. He vaguely remembers Finn trying to get him up this morning, excited to go out and play some tennis today. He remembers being grumpy and Leo saying something about letting him rest. Then Leo coming back, acknowledging that it was a bad day, and letting Logan cry before leaving him on his own for a bit.

He pushed the covers aside and planted his feet on the ground, getting up to walk to the bathroom. It felt like everything was in slow motion. He made his way to the kitchen, the apartment unusually silent. He stopped at the counter and stared at the coffee pot for he wasn’t sure how long before two long arms wrapped around his waist slowly. He blinked back to reality and realized Leo was behind him, talking.

“Lo? Logan? Hey, you in there?” He sounded worried, tossing his keys on the counter.

Logan turned around in Leo’s arms and brought his hands up to rest on the younger boy’s chest. “Quoi? Oui. Désolé.” The world still seemed to be moving too slow and muffled. He hadn’t even heard Leo enter their apartment just now. He wasn’t sure why, but it felt like there was cotton in his ears, and all his thoughts being drowned about by a dull ringing. “I…” Logan’s words died in his mouth. He didn’t know what was going on or what was wrong beyond the fact the something was wrong. Tears started to well in his eyes.

Leo gave a sad sigh and pulled the shorter boy into his chest, one hand on the back of Logan’s neck, the other rubbing soothingly up and down his broad, bare back. They stood there for several long minutes as Logan sobbed silently into his chest.

After Logan’s tears tapered to a stop, he held Leo close and whispered, voice a bit rough, “I though you were helping bake?”

“I hadn’t heard anything, so I came by to check and see how you were doing. Drink any water?”

“Haven’t had anything.” Logan mumbled into the taller man’s chest, shivering in the cool apartment in only a pair of shorts.

Leo held him close. “How about I make some peppermint tea? Yeah?”

“You should get back.”

Leo sighed, noting Logan’s subtle attempt to hint that he just wanted to be left alone, though the physical comfort he seemed to seek begged to differ.

“I have time to make you a cup, then I’ll get back. Is that okay?” Leo asked softly, running a hand up and down the shorter man’s back.

“Oui.” Logan grumbled, pulling away from Leo in favor of curling up on the couch with the blanket they kept there.

A few long and silent minutes passed before Leo handed him a warm mug, placing a soft kiss to his head before saying something Logan couldn’t focus enough to hear. He just curled around the warmth of the mug and watched Leo go.

Logan wasn’t sure how much time passed, but he had only taken a few sips of tea and now it was cold. He set it on the coffee table and made his way into the bedroom, picking up his phone and seeing a text from Sirius.

Hey, missed you at dinner the other night. Everything okay?

I yeah just wasn’t feeling it ig

Fair. Anything I can do to help?

Are you busy rn? No worries if not

I’ll be there in 20. Never too busy for you Tremz <3

Thanks cap

***

“Hey Leo?” Sirius said, walking into the kitchen. “I just got a text from Tremz, I’m gonna head over, d’accord? I’ll let you know how it goes.”

Leo gave a sad smile. “Okay. Thank you.”

And with that, Sirius headed out the door and made his way across town to the cub’s apartment.

When he got there, he let himself in and toed off his shoes. He found Logan curled up on the couch, nearly asleep under a comforter that Sirius knew had been dragged out of their bedroom. Logan seemed to not even notice him until he sat cross legged on the floor in front of him.

“Hey, Tremz. What can I do?”

Logan’s only response was to sniffle and pull the oversize blanket tighter around himself.

“Hey,” Sirius cooed as he got up to settle on the couch next to Logan, wrapping him up in a hug, “C’est bon. It’s okay. Shh.” He pulled the shorted man’s head to his chest.

“But-” Logan hiccupped, “I ditched him. We- we were supposed to play tennis, bu- but I just couldn’t.”

“It’s okay, Finn will understand. I’m sure he understands.”

“But I- I did it last week too. An- And Kasey and Natalie, we were all supposed to-”

“Logan,” Sirius said more sternly, pulling away just enough to meet his eyes, “I’m sure they understand, it happens. If they don’t, they’ll get over it. You have to take care of you, and if you don’t have the energy, or people points, to do things, that’s okay.”

“People points?” Logan hiccupped again.

“Oui. Like, some days you can have lots of people points to use up by being social? And some people take more people points because they can be a lot to be around, which isn’t a bad thing. Like… I love Finn, yeah? But he’s got a lot of energy sometimes and talks a mile a minute, and sometimes I can’t keep up. And some days, I just don’t have people points to use up, or I have only a few. For me, Re doesn’t take a lot of my people points to be around, and when he knows I’m having a bad day, we just snuggle up to a movie, or, I don’t know, we just sit in companionable silence? We just don’t do socially exhausting things. And Dumo, he’s good at seeing when I’m just out of points, and he’s easy to be around, even when Re is too much. And he understands. Your boys will understand too.”

Logan had pulled away to sit back and had been nodding along slowly, staring down at the floor, deep in thought. “D’accord. That… makes sense, I guess. I just… I feel like I’m low on people points all the time lately.” He sniffled quietly.

“That’s okay. You just need to get some rest and… I’m gonna say this and don’t get upset, but I think you should start seeing Heather more regularly.”

“I- yeah.” He sighed out. “Why would I get upset when you’re right? I… I saw her a few times, but then I was fine, so I thought- I don’t know, that I didn’t need to see her anymore or waste her time.”

“Tremz, there doesn’t have to be anything wrong to see her, and it’s not a waste of time. Not if it helps keep you in a good place. And- And sometimes it’s not enough. To keep you good, and that’s okay. I…” Sirius let out a long exhale, steadying himself for what he was about to admit next. “For a while, when I was still living with Dumo, nothing helped. And even after I was with Re, I… My childhood sucked, yeah? And I had a lot of nightmares because of it. Still do once in a while, but it’s not- just not as much? I… So I went on medication for it. And there’s nothing wrong with that. It’s helped. A lot.”

“I- I didn’t know that. That you took medication for, well, anything.”

“Yeah… I don’t really like talking about it. Not because I’m embarrassed or anything, but because it’s my business. And Re’s too. And Dumo knows, but only because he had suggested I bring it up with Heather in the first place. I also have high blood pressure I take medication for, but I think that’s all the stress of the job.” Sirius joked, giving a small chuckle, trying to lighten the conversation a bit.

“I- Thank you. For sharing that. I never really considered that as an option. Finn and Leo might have something to say abo-”

“It is an option if you want it to be. And the decision isn’t Leo and Finn’s to make. It’s yours. You don’t have to bring it up to them if you don’t want, but I think you should tell them what your thinking. Just don’t let them make the decision for you. It’s up to you.”

Logan nodded. He moved to pick up his mug from the table but retracted his hand when he realized it was cold and gave a sad sigh.

“You want fresh tea?” Sirius asked, gesturing to the mug.

“No, it’s okay.” He said quietly.

“Is it? I’ll ask again, would you like a warm cup of…” Sirius trailed off as he leaned forward to snag the mug off the coffee table and give it a sniff. He laughed to himself, “… of course, peppermint tea?”

“I mean, kinda, but I don’t want to get up so-”

“I’ll be back.” Sirius said, taking the mug into the kitchen to dump it out and make a new one.

“Sirius-”

“Ah ah ah, nope. I’m doing this for you, just sit tight.”

A few moments later, Sirius returned, pressing a warm mug into Logan’s hands, tea bag still steeping.

Logan whispered a soft, “Thank you” and took a small sip, huddling himself around the warmth as Sirius settled next to him, shoulder to shoulder.

“Is there anything else I can do? Leave? Stay?” Sirius asked softly.

“Stay. If you don’t mind?”

“Of course, as long as you need.”