#i said yeah man its possible look and just wrote the code
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aroaceofthesea · 6 days ago
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I had a programming midterm today and istg some people are just stupid
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gaybabeyjailbreak · 3 months ago
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Calm the pretention, it makes you sound sleazy.
I'm sure the scene of all these white skinned main characters and Kabru (where is the Melanin in your eyes my guy.) having a meal is a parallel of things going swimmingly for everyone else that's not the 5 specific flavours of white man & catgirls.
Ryoko wrote a serviceable combination of DnD and shokugeki no soma. In that matter she was successful. But that's about as well as it did, because unless you're a terminally obsessed Dunmeshi fan, treating the characters like your new dolls in a dollhouse, there's nothing outstanding about the show. Yeah sure the recipes are creative but those could also be written in a special niche fantasy themed recipe book and would work just as well.
It doesn't offer any deeper mind-blowing revelations or philosophies, it doesn't go into the same extreme of food porn as SnS, and it doesn't even bother to make characters that look visually interesting (I do not understand what is so appealing about Laois, I just do not.) the best they got is Falin and that's just sad. The point is that the show is average at best.
All that long point to say that any parallel about racism doesn't fucken work as you think it does and certainly wasn't intentional. It's a setting where select humanoids are arbitrarily evil and other select humanoids are coded after irl non-white races but are in the same "category", simply because Ryoko tried to work with an intrinsically racist setting that is DnD's world building. That's telling me enough about the complexity the author put in.
Anyway
That's easy. I don't use racism as a poorly understood crutch for a plot during writing. I do not use it almost at all.
A. It is not necessary for any story point, ever. I do not need racism to make plots or characters compelling, side or main, and there are other ways to establish the same effect of discrimination.
B. I view it as a prevalent human trait to do, so if I decide for its inclusion, it will only be present in humans if they're included, and only against other humans if I decide the inclusion is somehow necessary or worthy of something.
C. If i do decide to add it, I at least have the sense to give it the main focus in its included arc or plot point. And have it move somewhere by the end of said arc or plot point.
While we're here in fantasy, I also try and avoid xenophobia between my species as much as possible.
I do not:
Make species that share single moralistic traits (The evil species of evil good worshippers, that's what societies are for.)
Code my species like real life cultures and racial groups.
Make settings predicated on singular species supremacy. (No worlds where humans dominate and thus allow for minority coded species to introduce racism.)
And it's very very easy not to write about it.
There is literally nothing racist about dunmeshi at all, ryoko kui has a vast amount of characters with different body types and skin tones, and yet you’re here calling it “dnd” as if it’s not its own thing. Admit it, you’re just mad she doesn’t add black characters in a medieval European setting where they shouldn’t even exist.
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arlecchno · 2 years ago
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IM SO GLAD YOURE ALSO LOVING SUMMERS FIC IM LIKE ACTUALLY SO IN LOVE WITH IT (insert me going batshit insane) alsooo do look forward to more stupid banter in the middle of supposedly serious situations , they are the best and there are more . stan mcs little water creations tbh
bleh , honestly all my other writing works are old and i think pretty shitty at this point but i can link you to some if you really want (or i could write you a short story / drabble , i feel like thatd be less embarrassing on my part lmao , lmk if you want that) about my games though ... 1 2 3(WIP) the first two are well over a year old now , plus primarily unedited , so dont mind any possible grammar mistakes or generally terrible story flow (i swear ive gotten better since these 😰) and the third was also created last year (for a school project) , im slooowly chipping away at finishing the code haha ...
I ACTUALLY COMMENT ON MY OWN DOCS AS WELL !!! there arent much of them because .. well i havent wrote much outside of my private dms LOL
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i also think it is insanely fun to comment on my own work
aand ive contacted my friends (aka my two and only true loves /p /hj) about the kinnie thing .. and one of them sent me this to fill out
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youre not wrong actually haha , am i that easy to read ?
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im an ambivert , i dont like seeking out social interaction irl unless its one of my close friends or im just that bored , but i do get really loud / energetic when i am comfortable (i think you can tell that by how much goddamn energy i put into these asks) but my "social battery" still drains relatively fast i cant handle people very well lmao honestly , my and cynos reasoning for making our terrible jokes align a bit , although most people (apart from my irl friends apparently ???) dont find me intimidating , my main motivation when i slip in puns is to get people to laugh at how terrible they are , because im well aware theyre pretty bad (or all my friends just have the same broken sense of humor i do) . but yeah , i guess now theres two people on my genshin kin list now why do i kin both of the artificial humans in the game -
lets play a game where we ask eachother random questions , so its easier to end things off lol , got a window in your room ? if so , rate the view it has !
- jellyfish
yes the summers fic is so good thank you very much for recommending me it 😖🫶
AND YOOO THOSE GAMES ARE CUTE HAHA i liked nel and akira!!! also impressive how you did 2/3 of them in scratch,, i've had very little experience with it from like a few years back when i took a computing class and damn was it hard as hell 😵‍💫😵‍💫 so kudos to you man
glad i'm not the only one who comments on my own fics on docs LMAO and like you said, it's insanely fun!!!
the way that you're technically all of the above in the bingo 😭😭😭 and that drawing is sooo pretty!£8483£!!£! is that you or an oc of yours? (either way i've been eyeing it ever since i started typing here, hehe)
sooo i basically predicted what you're like irl?
i think for the most part it's because i'm a bit similar to you in some sort of ways, i'm only ever close with my closest friends and can get tired by interacting with people sometimes 😞 but the downside is that everyone finds me scary HAHA 😭😭 my friends had told me a bunch of times on how intimidating i look, when i really just have a normal expression on my face... apparently they said i always look like i have murder on my mind 🚶‍♀️
you now have another addition to the kin list, congrats 🤗
GREAT GAME!!! i do have a window in my room but it doesn't really have a great view... i'm currently living in a shitty apartment for the time being and the only thing i see from the window of my room is my neighbour's unit from my apartment complex 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️ so i'd probably give it a 3/10 T-T
now, a question for you! what's the most silliest thing that you currently own? (it can be a purchased item, a gift you got, etc)
hope you're having a great day jellyfish ^^
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wiypt-writes · 4 years ago
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Rock ‘N’ Roll People In A Disco World
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Part 2- Panic At The Disco
Intro: You head to the hospital as Paul’s life hangs in the balance and as you wait for news, you start to reflect on the early days of your relationship.
Pairing: Paul Diskant x Reader
Warnings: Bad language, Smut (NSFW, 18+)
Disclaimer: This is a pure work of fiction and classified as 18+. Please respect this and do not read if you are underage. I do not own any characters in this series bar the reader and any other OCs. By reading beyond this point you understand and accept the terms of this disclaimer.
A/N: So, you migh recognise a few familiar names/faces in this as well- I can assure you this isn’t an Avengers/Diskant AU, just a way for me to pay tribute to a few of our faves…because, why not!
Rock ‘n’ Roll People Masterlist // Main Masterlist
Part 1
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"All units, we have a possible 2-4-5 in progress at 4223 E Palm, South of Figueroa and 1st. Unit responding is requesting back up, 11-9-9, Code 3."
"Unit 613 responding, Code 3."
The call went out over dispatch and you felt a slight relief at the fact support was on its way. You took a deep breath, held firm, your weapon poised as your partner stood next to you. 
"LAPD, drop the weapon and come out with your hands up. We will fire." Officer Barton, a long time veteran on beat called out. "Panny, hit the porch."
You nodded and walked the short steps, bracing yourself against the stucco near the jam. 
"Come on Garcia, your old lady called it in, I have back up coming, bro. You don't want this to go down worse than it is," Barton shouted. "Don't make my Rookie work hard today, man."
Lights and sirens filled your ears and soon a second unit had arrived on scene. The suspect, now surrounded, soon surrendered, his weapon dropped to the ground as he came out of his home with his hands up. 
The second unit to respond to the call was helping Barton with the arrest while you headed inside to check on the girlfriend who'd called it in. She was beat up and bloodied, a bullet graze across her upper left arm. Paramedics were treating her as you wrote down everything she could tell you for the report to be filed later. 
You gave the woman’s hand a little squeeze as you promised her you’d be right back and headed outside where you saw Barton stood talking to one of the duty sergeants from the second unit and another officer who you hadn’t seen before.
"She's requesting an escort, both medics are male," You said to Barton.
“Okay.” Barton nodded. “You good to take it or do you want me to call back and request someone take over?”
You shook your head, “Nah, I’m good, I could use the overtime. It’s no problem.”
"Rookies, always looking for the pay out," Barton laughed at you and you snorted before you looked back at the house.
“Well, to be honest I wanna make sure she’s okay, she’s beat up pretty bad.”
"Yeah, well this isn't their first 240 but now, it's bumping to a 273D, if she keeps the chargers." Barton nodded. “Okay, go with her and I’ll file the initial report when I get back. You can add your details to it later.”
“See, we’re not always money grabbing assholes.” The officer you’d never met before turned his eyes to the sergeant who met his look with one of his own. “Some of us rookies are simply driven by our social conscience.”
As the two men looked at one another it was clear that the statement meant something, and you could probably take a good guess that the officer in question had also had his fair share of rookie jokes at his expense. It was part and parcel of being a newbie.
“Oooh I’m sensing a little bit of tension there, Barnes!” Barton looked at the sergeant who scoffed and rolled his eyes.
“He’s a wise guy, thinks he’s funny.”
“I don’t think it, I know it.” The buzz cut man shrugged. “Why else does everyone laugh at me when I walk into a room?”
At that you couldn’t help a little chuckle of laughter as your eyes looked over the hood of Sargent Barnes' black and white and caught the name plate of the wise ass, before your eyes flicked up to his face. A pair of shades were pushed up on top of his shorn light brown hair, revealing a pair of blue eyes which were twinkling slightly with good humour. He was clean shaven with a strong jawline, and a pretty handsome profile with high cheekbones and a smattering of freckles over his nose. Two strong arms folded over a broad chest, as he stood tall, a good inch or so above Sergeant Barnes and a fair few over you. 
His eyes caught yours, a smirk curling in his lips as he clearly thought you’d been checking him out.
Which, to be fair, you had, and all in all, he was pretty damned hot.
"Don't I know you?" He asked, his hands unfolding from across his chest and coming to rest on his utility belt, either side of the buck.
“I don’t think so.” You shook your head.
“I’m sure I do. I never forget a pretty face.”
You laughed at the blatant pick up line and looked at Barton who was watching, his eyebrow raised. You shook your head and turned back to make some sly quip of your own before the medic interrupted the exchange, telling you they were ready for transport. You nodded before once more switching your attention back to the three men around you.
“It’s been a pleasure, gents.” You smiled, nodding to both Barton and Sergeant Barnes before you turned to look at the other man. "Diskant.”
He feigns a pain to his chest with a hard slap of his right hand over his heart. "Uh, you do know me! That hurts."
“Read your name tag.” You shrugged and with that you turned and left.
The red and blue lights of the black and white bouncing off the concrete exterior of UCLA Medical Centre as you arrived brought you out of your memory. Officer Weiss opened the door for you and escorted you inside where the waiting room had been cleared and you were met with the somber faces of not only Captain Biggs, but Paul's Captain, Sam Wilson. But what brought your world crashing down on you for the second time that night was seeing your own Captain, Steve Rogers, waiting for you. Wilson had to have called him in.
"Steve," your voice quivered as your Captain and friend wrapped an arm around you. Sam, too, pulling you close. "What...." you couldn't even get the words out, each syllable choked back by the closing of your throat, sobs threatening to escape. 
"We don't know, not yet. The call came in as an officer down, unit in pursuit. Medics arrived and called in code blue, 10-45C GSW to the neck. As soon as they arrived he was wheeled into emergency surgery," Captain Biggs explained. 
The air left your lungs at the news and you near hit the floor, both Rogers and Wilson catching an arm, and had you been more with it, you’d have clocked the worried look that your Captain shot Sam. He'd known you since your training at the academy, his eye on you for SWAT from the get go, and never had he seen your lose control in such a way. You hadn’t on the job, not once. It was something you prided yourself on.
Biggs grabbed a chair from the wall behind him, where a dozen lined the sterile white space, and allowed you to flop into it. Your hands were shaking, legs bouncing on the balls of your feet, the tore up converse you’d slipped on squeaking a little on the clinical floor. You’d dressed in such a haste, your skinny jeans being grabbed straight back off the top of the hamper for you to put on, one of Paul’s hoodies being pulled on over a tight camisole. Whilst you hadn’t given a single thought to what you were wearing, clearly your subconscious had wanted to be near him, and you were glad as you pulled the dark grey item round you tighter, breathing in his smell. And you were reminded of the first time you were able to really be close enough to smell his cologne or deodorant, a smell that was uniquely Paul Diskant. 
It was Friday and your shift had just finished. It was the first time your rest days had fallen over a Saturday and Sunday, and you were making the most of it. A few from your team were heading to Jack's Bar for a few beers and, you suspected, a lot of shots and probably karaoke later, apparently that’s how your team nights went down.
You’d been there a few hours and your rounds had all gotten out of sync, as was always the case when everyone had had a few, so you stood up to head to the bar to get yourself a refill, cringing at the cat-screeching masquerading as singing which was ringing around the room. You found a space, placing your empty glass on the smooth wood of the bar and stood waiting for the bar tender. You hadn’t been there long when someone sidled in next to you, their elbow lightly brushing your arm and you glanced up to see the handsome, buzz-cut officer that had attended the 273D you’d dealt with in the week.
“Did you bring your cuffs?” He asked and you frowned, looking at him.
“What? Why?”
He jerked his head over his shoulder in the direction of the woman singing, “because she’s murdering Shania Twain and whilst she may feel like a woman, personally I feel that as police officers, it’s our duty to prevent crimes of this nature.”
You groaned out a laugh, “Jesus, you’re terrible”
“My name isn’t Jesus, but give me a chance and I’ll make you say ‘Oh God’,” he shot you a wink, “how’s that for terrible?”
You laughed and shook your head, cocking it slightly to one side as you studied him for a second. And then, you decided on a little joke of your own. “It’s Disco, right?”
He groaned, dropping his head in a dramatic sigh. “Diskant. Come on, you read my name tag, remember?”
"Diskant."  You shrugged, "Close enough."
He chuckled, nodding to your drink that was down to the foam at the bottom of the glass, "what are you drinking?"
"Beer," you replied.
"Any beer? Or..."
"The Heff," you nod to the taps.
Diskant waved the bartender over, "Jack, can we get another round, one for me and one for Officer...."
"Y/L/N."
"Officer Y/L/N. Whatever she's drinking."
"It's Paul by the way," he smirked at you while dropping some cash on the bar top as Jack returned your beers.
"Thanks for the beer, Disco," You winked and walked off to join your partner and the rest of the shift team.
“Woah, it’s like that? I buy you a drink and you bail, without even telling me your name?” He scoffed and you turned to look at him over your shoulder, giving him a smirk.
“Yeah," you shrugged, and when you turned away you could feel his eyes burning into your back.
Later, you saw him laughing in a full body tilt, eyes crinkled and his smile exploding. His partner, whom you'd recognized again as Barnes, had said something ridiculous causing the table to erupt.
You headed to the bar and ordered a round of shots for your team and another beer to chase it. But sent one over Paul's way, with a note on the napkin.
When the waitress took the beer to him, she placed the napkin down first, making sure he saw the scribbled note.
'Now we're even. - Y/N'
You watched as he read the note, a huge smile breaking over his handsome face and he turned, bright eyes searching the bar. When they fell on you, he arched his brow and raised his beer in thanks. You gave a sharp jerk of your head to show you’d seen and turned back to your team.
From then on, he was a persistent little shit. He'd somehow figured out your shift patterns, catching you in and out of the doors to the station as you'd be coming off shift and he starting his. Barton liked to give you shit for it as he'd always walk with you out, calling Diskant "your lost, little puppy-dog" and the unit were quick to catch on. It was all in good fun, until one day, you'd worked a tough shift; chasing down a couple of suspects and catching yourself up on a fence, gashing your arm good. Medics treated you at the scene, but told you that it required stitches. You finished you shift anyway and like clockwork, there he was walking in as you were out.
"Hey Y/N, you okay?" He'd expressed concern as your face was blatantly displaying your discomfort and mood which wasn’t great.
You were tired, irritated and in pain, now that the day was over, you wanted to just go home, so you seemed to snap in reply, "What the hell is it gonna take for you to just go away?"
Your response took him back a bit as he raised his hands in defense."Whoa, relax," his voice was soft and careful.
You sighed and stepped out of the way of the different people coming in and out the doors. He followed. "I'm sorry, that was shitty. It's just been a really long day."
"It’s okay, I get it. Look, I'm off today, I was coming in to get some stuff I left in my locker. I'm sorry if I've crossed a line somehow."
You thought to yourself for a moment. He hadn't crossed any line, not one that made you uncomfortable. You had your own reservations about dating someone from work, but it wasn’t like no one else did it, hell, half the entire force seemed to be married to one another, and if you were honest, you were actually kind of attracted to him and you found his flirty way of things to be fun and you liked it.
“No, you didn’t, like I said, bad day.” You shook your head. “I gotta head to the clinic for some stitches, and if I’m honest, I’m not a huge fan of needles so...."
He frowned “you hurt yourself?”
"Got hung up on a chain link chasing a perp through an alley. Finished the shift with the bandages from the medics, now I gotta take care of it."
"Do you... errr...", he moved out of the way of someone leaving the building and scratched the back of his neck, "do you need a lift up there or something, I got nothing else on."
"I could use a ride, sure," you shrugged, a small smirk tugging at the corner of your lips.
“Okay, well gimme two minutes to grab something out of my locker and I’ll be with you in a second.”
You headed out of the way of the various traffic in and out of the station and perched on the low wall that surrounded the parking lot. True to his word, Diskant emerged a few minutes later, sliding his shades down from his head to his eyes, a bright pink gift bag in his hand and for some inexplicable reason, you felt your heart sink at the sight of the item in his hand, it was clearly for a woman.
“Who’s the lucky girl?” You asked, nodding to it as he stopped in front of you. A smirk crossed his face and a brow arched over the top of his wraparounds.
“Is that your way of asking me if I have a girlfriend?” He quipped and you hastily shook your head, lying through your teeth.
“No, I was just…making conversation. Besides, you might be gay for all I know.” You finished lamely and he snorted.
“Well, I’m not, and it’s for my Mom. It’s her birthday tomorrow and she’s a pain in the ass for finding her presents in my room or wherever I hide them. That and I actually only picked it up yesterday and forgot about it.”
"None of my business." You shrugged and at that he sighed, looking down before he glanced at you, chuckling.
"You asked, sweetheart."
The pet name had you feeling a little warm around your neck. Thankfully, Diskant then led you to his car, the conversation moving swiftly onwards as you explained in a little more detail how you’d gotten your injury. By the time you’d finished you were out of the parking lot and had joined the steady stream of traffic on the main road.
“You should count yourself lucky that it was only your arm.” Paul mused, his thumb tapping the steering wheel. “One of the first shifts I ever did ended with the guy I’d been partnered with straddling a piece of razor-wire.”
“Ouch.” You winced and Paul wrinkled his nose.
“Lot of blood and screaming.” He sniffed. “Mind you, every cloud and all that, he said it would save him and his wife a fortune on a vasectomy.”
You blinked before your mouth fell open in disbelief and you scoffed, shaking your head. “Bullshit.”
“I swear down…”
“Don’t believe you, Disco.”
“Well, I’m offended on two counts. First that you think I’m untrustworthy and second you know that’s not my name.” He shook his head, hanging a right.
You shrugged, “I like it, it suits you.”
“I used to get that all the time at school.” He shrugged, “fucking everyone used to sing that damned D-I-S-C-O song in the halls.”
“Okay, now that’s in my head.” You smirked, and you opened your mouth to sing but he cut you off.
“Just, no.”
You laughed and took a deep breath. “Well, if it makes you feel any better my team call me Panny, short for Panic. On account of the fact I never seem to.”
At that he snorted, “yeah, I’m not calling you that, that’s, fucking awful!”
You let out a low chuckle, “Y/N’s fine.”
“Mind you,” he stole a quick glance at you before his eyes went back to the road. “Panic at the Disco, not a bad band.”
You rolled your eyes and chuckled a little. The conversation flowed with little interruption or awkwardness and once you arrived, your time at the clinic seemed relatively fast. You'd figured he'd left as you'd said goodbye to one another when you'd entered the clinic but to your surprise, and catching you a bit off guard, he was still waiting. 
"You didn't have to wait." You smiled at him and he shrugged.
“How else you gonna get back for your car?" His eyes flicked down, noting the clean wound and stitches in your forearm.
“Uber?” You shrugged and he paused, before he took a deep breath.
“Okay, you could have but my mom taught me never to leave a lady in need of help.”
"I was in there for an hour," You chuckled.
“Yeah, and now I’m kinda hungry, are you hungry?"
“Diskant…”
"There's a little place I know where we get some great quick food."
"And if I say no?"
"I'm a gentleman and no is no, I’ll take you back to the lot and you get in your car.” He paused, "and then I'll go home and weep into my pillow as I deal with your rejection."
You laugh loudly, genuinely amused, "fine, take me to dinner."
"Woah, I didn't say anything about dinner. I said food."
"Fine, food, let's get some food."
With a grin he gestured for you to lead the way and you headed out of the medical centre back to his car.
It turns out the place he’d been meaning was the Santa Monica Pier. And the food he had in mind was hot dogs and fries, which suited you absolutely fine.
"Alright, I gotta hand it to you, this is a pretty good hot dog and the beer isn't half bad," You tilted back the drink and smiled. "But, it doesn't beat Coney Island."
"Never been," he shrugged, "so I'll have to take you at your word."
"What else do you take me for? Obviously, you're swindling your way into something."
"I resent that accusation, Y/N."
"If I didn't know any better, I'd say you just suckered me into a date." You teased and he paused, turning to face you. “And, seeing as you said that was what it would take to get you to leave me alone…” “No, this is not a date.” He cut you off, shaking his head.
 “Hmm, just the two of us, you bought me food, pretty sure it counts as a date.” You wrinkled your nose, your tone flirty and Paul shook his head once more.
“Nope. Absolutely not. There’s a vital element missing.”
“What?”
“I haven’t kissed you.” He signed dramatically. “So, I’m afraid that if you want me to count this as a date then you’re gonna have to lay one on me.”
“Oh my God-“ You burst out laughing, “You are-“
“Hey, I don’t make the rules, Y/N!”
“So, to be absolutely clear, if I kiss you this counts as a date?”
“Yes.” He nodded.
“Well,” You popped a shoulder, stepping a little closer to him, your eyes flicking from his to his lips, “what the hell.”
You brought your lips to his, a littler firmer than you'd thought but the feel of his mouth against yours was soft and in a way delicate and as you began to pull away, his arm looped around your rib cage and pulled you back in for a longer, deeper kiss that if you'd been honest with yourself, made your stomach tilt and your toes curl. The way his tongue dipped into your mouth was delightful, the salty hoppy taste of the beer and fries you were sharing still an essence in his mouth. 
Breathless, you pulled away, “You gonna leave me alone now?”
“Not a chance.” He chuckled and leaned in again for a third kiss. 
"Y/N..." the voice calling out to you was familiar but your head was pounding and nothing but a fog had filtered over you. Tearfully coming out of your memory, you looked up to see Dorothy, Paul's mom standing before you, her husband Jim in the background talking to Sam. 
"Hi," you croaked and stood from your chair. She immediately wrapped her arms around you in a tight embrace. "I'm sorry... I didn't..."
"Its okay, Jimmy called us after Sam had called us both." She tearfully explained. "We came as soon we'd heard." She nodded to James Barnes, Paul's former beat partner who was talking with Jim, Sam and now Steve. 
"Dotty, I... I'm scared." You cried and she took hold of you again. Together you cried until Jim came and hugged you both, his eyes tearful but his demeanour strong. As a force veteran himself, Big Jim Diskant knew all too well how these things could happen but never did he want to believe it'd be his own son wounded in the line of duty. 
Barnes was quick to hand you a tissue and you accepted with a sad, soft smile in thanks. "He's gonna pull through, doll. Just you watch. You can't get rid of him that easy."
Your quivering lip turned to a wobble until you saw the doctor emerge from the double doors that led into the body of the hospital. His scrubs were bloodied and you feared the worst as he called out, "family of Paul Diskant."
The world around you felt like it was moving at a snail's pace, your stomach in your throat as you, Dotty, Jim and those there to comfort you all made their way to the doctor. 
"We've moved him into the ICU. He's critical, however, I'm hard pressed to say stable. He's not out of the woods yet. The bullet hit his carotid artery which supplies the brain, face and neck and while we were able to remove it, he's lost a lot of blood and I feel it's best to keep him medically sedated until some real healing takes place. That's all up to him on how long that will take and how his body works. Unfortunately, until he wakes up, we won’t be able to determine if there will be any long lasting damage due to the loss of blood to the brain. You should know, we nearly lost him once during the procedure and I know he coded twice before arrival. He's a fighter, that's for sure. For now, he just needs time."
"Can we see him?" Dotty asked, the words not able to leave your lips. 
"You can. One at a time," the doctor replied. "ICU rules. I can take the first of you up with me now."
Dotty very quickly turned to you, "go on." You looked at her like a deer in headlights. Jim nodded in agreement with his wife. 
"Follow me," the doctor nodded to go with him and as he did, he handed you a small plastic bag. "We had to cut it off. I'm sorry."
He placed the bag containing Paul's St. Christopher medal in your hand. It was covered in blood, no doubt from what had happened and the weight of it felt heavier than it ever had before in your hand as you joined the good doctor on the lift up.
It had been a month into your relationship when your parents decided to head out for a week trip to New York, your dad making good on his promise to treat your mom for their anniversary. That meant that you and Paul were playing house for the week.
After seeing them off, you'd proudly tidied up and made sure you pampered yourself before your date night to kick the week off. Fridays post shift were usually spent at Jack's but, you were off and Paul and Barnes were already day shift, as if the stars had perfectly aligned for tonight. Your gut was telling you that after a month of heavy, very heavy petting, absolutely breath-taking make out sessions and a few down the pants moments, tonight just might be the night things would change for the two of you. And if not tonight, then hopefully while the two of you were shacked up for the next five days.
A few hours of primping, preening and a ridiculously relaxing bath, setting fire to that very diamonds and pearls side of you, you picked out your nicest lingerie, a little all black set of bra and panties that hid lines well in your selected sleek black dress. Paul had said the two of you were going for a nice dinner, and he promised it was truly a nice dinner, not like the last he'd said was nice and you two laughed your way through burgers at the Beach Hut. He was going to pick you up at five, and you needed to be ready.
Punctual as always, your doorbell rang and there he was, duffle in one hand, flowers for you in the other. He always brought you flowers on your dates and you loved the old fashioned in him that clearly was a product of his parents love story.
You smiled at him from behind red lips and smoky eyes, your hair down and straight. "Hey! Thank you!" You took the outstretched flowers and welcomed him in. 
"Wow," he whispered, getting the full view of you as he stepped inside the doorway. "Sweetheart, you..., wow."
“You said nice... so if you’re taking me to some dive, Disco, when I’m dressed like this there’s gonna be trouble.”
"I promise, it's nice." Dropping his overnight bag next to the stairs, he followed you into the kitchen as you put the flowers in a vase. You turned from the island and his lips were on yours. "You do look beautiful, but if you want to get into trouble, I've got my cuffs in the car." 
You didn't miss the fire in his eyes and the feeling between your legs. “I thought only bad girls get the cuffs?”
"Maybe we should see how bad you can get."
"You're gonna have to feed me first."
“Damn, you drive a hard bargain.”
You wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him in for a deep kiss, fingers scratching at the nape of his neck, "You think that's hard, you should..."
His finger covered your lips, "don't, don't finish that sentence or we'll never make dinner. THAT I can promise."
You smirked and pulled away from him fully, grabbing your hand bag off the entry table, "I'm ready, let's go."
The meal was divine, expensive and rich in place and taste, you dined on steaks and lobsters, Paul pulling out all the stops for such a new relationship and start of a fun weekend. You didn't mind, but you also knew that you'd have been fine with something simple too. 
"You know you didn’t have to spend so much, I’d have laid on my back for a sub," you sighed contently as he drove you two back to yours. 
"Well, in that case, fuck it, next time it's Subway."
"Is that what this was? You buttering me up so I'd sleep with you, Disco?"
“No, that’s...” he stopped and shrugged, “did it work?”
All you did was smirk back at him. From then, until tires skidded into the driveway, Paul drove at lightspeed, making a snarky comment about needing a red light for the dash or wishing he was in his squad car because he couldn't get you home fast enough. You were barely in the door before he was all over you, hands tangled through your hair, you kicking your shoes off at the bottom of the stairs. His strong arms and big hands lifted you off your feet as you clawed at him, your legs wrapping around his slender waist while he carried you up the stairs. It was a mix of breathy sounds and lots of tongue until your back hit the lamp at the landing stair, causing it to tilt, and the bulb to break. 
Shit," Paul cursed against your lips. 
"I'll get that later," you replied, continuing to fight for dominance in your kiss. 
He managed to get you to your room, but your pace slowed down as you entered, the heat lowering to a simmer unlike the two horny teenagers you’d both been in the stairs and hall. Your toes curled into your plush carpet as he set you down. Breathless and chests heaving, you kissed each other softly and slowly as your fingers unbuttoned his shirt, trying to hide your nerves. Your nails raked down the chest of his crisp white tee he wore underneath. You could feel his heart under your palm. 
Your eyes looked into his and you saw deep and beautiful blue pools staring back at you, a soft twitch of a smirk at the corner of his mouth. He took a half breath and his lips covered yours, his tongue slowly rolling over your top lip to pull you in. It made your stomach drop in need, and you wrapped your arms around his neck to close the space between you. 
His big hand splayed over your right ass cheek and held you there against him while the other hand cupped your face. If anyone were to walk in, they'd think you were one person, the two of you were so close to one another. Then you felt his hand trail over the curve of your backside, closer and closer to the start of your zipper. You felt your dress grow looser as he pulled the little metal piece over the teeth of its track. 
His lips trailed over your skin, and you could feel his heart now racing through his pulse point in his neck. Your eyes met his as he pulled away a second, "me too," You whispered.
A breathy chuckle left his lips and you pulled your dress away from your body, allowing the fabric to hit the floor. You felt naked despite the bra and panty set, his gaze taking all of you in. By no means was this your first time with a man, but it was your first time with Paul, and so far, you'd never felt or experienced anything like this and he wasn't even inside you yet. It was like your skin was on fire from the inside out, all of your nerves firing at once, causing everything to tingle and your breath to catch as your heart threatened to leap from your chest. 
His foot stepped between yours and he placed his hands on your hips, gently backing you into the bed, his lips sealing with yours, your hands holding his forearms to steady yourself. His hands cradled you as the two of you fell into the mattress, his body covering yours, his lips traveling down your neck and nipping at that sensitive spot that made your panties pool and your thighs clench. Your hands shoved the material of his button down over his shoulders and, as his lips carried on toward the swell of your breasts, he flung the shirt wherever it landed.
You smirked as he figured out the bra you had on was front closure and with a snap your breasts were freed. 
"Fuck, sweetheart," he said with a tone you'd never heard from him before.
He had his mouth on you before you could reply, your skin flushing and that twist of stomach igniting with pleasure. His hot tongue lolled around your nipple before suckling it between his teeth and giving it a little pull. You moaned as he pulled away, your fingers scratching at his neck. He smirked against your other breast as you arched into him, his free hand running over your hip and behind you to palm your ass as your leg lifted and bent a knee at his hip.
"I....oh God," you purred as his tongue licked and his mouth sucked, alternating between your breasts. "Fuck, I... Paul, please."
He sat back and ripped his shirt over his head, adding it to the pile. You could see he was solid from your foreplay and you knew the size he was packing. Your stomach twisted in anticipation. 
"Please... What?" He said softly as he left hot, wet kisses up the inside of your thigh. "You know, for a trained police officer I would expect you to have a little more self-control, Baby.”
"Shut up..."
He nipped at your thigh, and you moaned obscenely, your muscles twitching. "You gonna tell me what you want?" He nipped again, higher this time. "Or.."
"I need you."
“I asked what you want...”
"Fuck me."
Quickly he was standing, undoing his belt and pants while pulling a condom from his back pocket. You laid there amazed and in awe of the thick muscles of his entire body, the bare chest and tight abs he had on display. You'd seen his thick and full length before, hell, you'd even put your mouth around it but now, all you can think of is how it would feel deep inside you. Your eyes watched him with a hunger you could feel coursing all through you, the way he rolled the latex circle down his shaft and kneeled toward you on the bed. 
He pulled at your panties, peeling them away from your body, your legs lifting to remove them fully. You were soaked as he tested your folds, slicking the head of his cock. It felt so good already, you were squirming by the time his head dipped inside you. He caged you in with his body as he pressed into you little by little until you were both moaning at the perfect fit as he became fully seated inside you. His St. Christopher medal dangled between the two of you as it ghosted across your chest. 
Your hand gripped the medallion as you gave a gentle pull, his lips barely touching yours, "I said fuck me, Diskant." You sealed your words with a hard kiss, nothing but tongue inside his mouth and his hips snapped, again the two of you making lewd sounds as your bodies joined together.
He broke away from your kiss and thrust his hips forward again, slowly pulling out and snapping back in. It was blissful torture, your body experiencing each movement as if it were new. Your walls continuously contracted around him, giving him a pressure around his cock. It was a tight fit, but not painful, not uncomfortable in any way. Your eyes and his never broke away from each other, only lashes kissing cheeks as you would close your eyes for a kiss. 
With a deep, intentional roll of his hips, his lips moved across your jaw and neck, settling near your ear. "I love you," he whispered. 
You gasped as you felt your body react, "Oh fuck!" You moaned, your orgasm coming out of nowhere, tightening around him hard. 
"Fucking hell," Paul moaned as his hips sped up, until he was spasming inside you, his seed filling the barrier. 
He stilled while inside you, pulling out and slipping away with a soft kiss, only to come back cleaned up and pulling the sheet over the two of you. He curled his body around yours, your bare skin against his chest, his hand entwined with yours as his lips kissed your tousled head. "You're amazing."
You turned to look at him with your tired but happy eyes, "did you mean it?" 
A soft smile splayed over his features as his eyes twinkled a bit, understanding exactly what you were referring to. "I was being ironic, as I was, literally loving you." He took a pause and leaned in for a sweet, all lip kiss. "But hypothetically... if I did mean it..." 
You grinned, “then, hypothetically I’d say I love you to."
He chuckled and quickly pecked you again before settling in behind you for sleep. "Good to know."
The bell to the lift beeped and the doors loudly opened, bringing you to the present. It felt like everything took forever since you'd received Captain Biggs' call. You followed the doctor down the hall and after a sharp left, he showed you the doorway to Paul's room. 
As you stepped inside, your heart shattered. The first thing you noticed was how small and pale he looked there in his bed. Paul wasn't a small guy, in fact he was six feet of thick muscle and hard strength. A built frame that loved to wrap itself around you any chance he could. Your firm and well taught body fitting like the perfect piece to him. You swallowed hard as you stepped forward, closer to the edge of his bed. There were so many wires, so many leads hooked up to the various machines that ensured he stayed in his medicinal sleep and keeping him alive. A tube for the ventilator was in his mouth and down his throat while monitoring equipment measured his vitals, IV lines and pumps full of medication surrounded him, a feeding tube was stuck in his nose, and not to mention the various drains and catheters. You found yourself cursing all the episodes of ‘Grey’s Anatomy’ the pair of you had watched as you weren't sure if you'd rather not fucking know what the hell they all were. 
Despite the sick symphony of beeps and blips on the screens, the only sound you heard was the sound of his heart rate on its own monitor. A steady, morbid mantra reminding you that he was there but not really there with you. 
Gone were those beautiful blue eyes you loved waking up to each morning or staring deeply into as his pupils, lust blown with deep passion, love and desire stared back you while you made love. Hiding behind an ugly plastic tube were those pearly whites you loved seeing when he smiled or laughed with his whole body, his cheeky grin missing. Silent was the voice that would make your heart skip its beats, your body ignite, that would meet your voice in reply, 'sugar'. 
You held back the sob that was choking you breathless and you sat in the chair beside his bed, facing him. Your warm and soft hand took hold of his, and you were broken at how cold he felt. 
As you looked up for some form of help to the heavens above, your eyes looked back at him and you gave a breathy, shaky sigh, "hey, Stud."
***** Part 3
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telehxhtrash · 4 years ago
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I tend to see a lot of people say that Togashi will leave things uncertain and ambiguous in between Killua and Gon, and while it’s a possibility, I honestly don’t think it’s the most likely thing to happen, and if it did, ambiguous wouldn’t be the correct term to call it.
People often say that Togashi likes to play with ambiguity when it comes to queer matters. Yes, Togashi likes to play with gender. We get to see that through Kite, Pitou and Kalluto in HxH (although its arguable because Kite is definitely not cis). But when Togashi decides that a character is queer, or that there is a relationship going on between two characters, he doesn’t leave it ambiguous.
Togashi has created queer characters in 3 of his main works : Yu Yu Hakusho, Level E and Hunter x Hunter. And everytime he created those characters, he made damn sure that everyone knew that these characters were queer. No room for any sort of ambiguity.
The first examples I have are from Yu Yu Hakusho, with a character named Miyuki, and the other is from Level E, with a character named Kyoko Mikihisa.
For these two characters, Togashi made it so that they emphasized themselves that they were trans. It’s painted extremely clearly, that they were born in the wrong body. There’s literally no room for any sort of ambiguity here.
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Togashi could’ve easily kept things ambiguous. There are plenty of ways he could’ve done it, keeping the character’s gender confusing. But he didn’t. He made it EXTRA clear that these characters were trans. This is mostly why I genuinely don’t believe you can describe Togashi’s queer rep as “ambiguous”. Because when the characters tell you themselves that they are, it’s canon. It’s not ambiguous.
Now, sometimes, Togashi likes to play it more subtle. He doesn’t make his characters say “I’m gay” or “I’m trans”, but he finds another way to say it.
In YYH, Togashi wrote a gay character : Itsuki. And he’s canonically gay, because when talking about another man, Sensui, he mentions that he sees him as a lover.
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It’s subtle. It’s not ambiguous.
Same thing for Alluka, Alluka never comes on screen and says “I’m a trans girl !”. The reason we know that Alluka is canonically a trans girl is because the Zoldycks insist on misgendering her, while Killua emphasizes that she’s a girl.
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And once again, it’s subtle. Not ambiguous. Even though I’ve seen a lot of redditors say that “Alluka’s gender is ambiguous”, Togashi is literally doing his utmost to highlight subtly that yes, Alluka is a trans girl.
But subtlety is not canon’s enemy. Not everything has to be painted clearly for it to be canon. Sometimes, you just have to piece every little clue together yourself. Just because the word “trans” is never canonically stated in HxH concerning Alluka, it doesn’t make her any less of a trans girl. Because as the audience, we UNDERSTOOD from the subtext and from the clash in gendering that she is trans.
So, yes, Togashi likes to be subtle. But subtlety doesn’t make things any less canon.
I’m drifting a bit to non-queer matters, but I also want to talk about two relationships in Togashi’s work that were canonically romantic, but subtle.
The first is Meruem and Komugi. It’s canon that the nature of their relationship was romantic. They never did couple-y things, or even kissed. But it doesn’t make the nature of their relationship ambiguous. Because it was once again, subtle, but drowning in subtext that Togashi deliberately put there.
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Togashi paralleled Killua saying that him dying with Gon would be a shinjuu (lover’s suicide), only for it to not happen in the end - but Togashi wanted to throw that word in. So we could have it at the back of our heads. Because when Meruem and Komugi died, it was a shinjuu. It was two lovers dying by the same method with the belief that they’d be united in the afterlife. Meruem only cared about spending his last moments playing with Komugi. They both said that they were only born to experience this moment, of being in pure bliss as they die together. When Komugi replies to Meruem and says that she’ll join him in death, she uses an old phrasing used to accept marriages proposals. They died holding hands.
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It was subtle, but canon. Because of all these clues and all the subtext Togashi planted, it is undeniable that their relationship was romantic. And they never kissed, never said “i love you”, but we still know : and that’s the beauty of subtlety.
Because yes, romance can be subtle AND canon.
Another example of a canon romantic relationship that was never officialized by a kiss : Keiko and Yusuke in Yu Yu Hakusho. Correct me if I’m wrong, but while they kissed in the anime, they never kiss in the manga.
But a relationship doesn’t need to be canonized by a kiss. I’ve never seen/read YYH, but while I was doing research, I read that their relationship grew naturally over the course of the manga. That they grew together, were affectionate with each other, but never told each other the nature of their feelings. Until one specific moment towards the end of the manga where this happens:
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All of this came naturally. No big confession, just a confirmation of what they both felt. And no kiss either ! No hand holding, no true “romantic” actions, either before or after that chapter. Just feelings. I’m quoting one of the post I used as reference, but “On one hand it's beautiful to finally hear it, but on the other, it's not even surprising. You find yourself caught off guard by how easily you're willing to accept that these two have felt this way throughout the entire series.”
And while it’s subtle, because you’d expect at least a kiss or something, it’s canon and undeniable that their relationship is romantic. It’s clear that the two of them are in love, even if they never kissed. Because it was clear from the beginning that this was where their relationship was going : all the building up to that one moment where they both basically tell each other “oh yeah, btw, i love you”. A simple confirmation of what they both knew, and of what we as readers knew too.
I guess my point is that Togashi can insist on the nature of his characters and relationships. He insisted that Miyuki, Mikihisa and Alluka were trans. But sometimes he also likes to be subtle, and not put everything plainly. But the subtlety doesn’t discredit its the canon legitimacy.
Now, onto what it means for Killua and Gon. 
I emphasized that Togashi liked to highlight when his characters are queer. There are absolutely NO DOUBTS that Miyuki and Alluka are trans girls, Mikihisa a trans man and that Itsuki was gay. It’s in canon. But they were all brought up differently, and it was either confirmed by them saying it themselves or by the context and subtext surrounding their queer identity.
But Togashi never left it ambiguous. We always had canon confirmation that they were queer. What I’m saying is, there’s a very, very high probability that Killua is gay and in love with Gon. We’ve seen it in the incredible amount of subtext deliberately placed by Togashi. And like I said, Togashi never left the nature of his queer characters ambiguous. So it’s highly likely that Togashi will confirm in canon at some point that Killua is gay. 
Now, while it’s likely Togashi will canonize Killua being queer plainly by either him saying it or subtext (just like Alluka), it doesn’t mean that his relationship with Gon will be canonized plainly too.
I mentioned earlier that Komugi/Meruem and Keiko/Yusuke’s relationships were subtle, while undeniably romantic. So maybe this will be the case for Killua and Gon’s relationship too. It looks like Togashi’s style for writing romance is show, not tell, thus making it a possibility that it’ll be the same for Killua and Gon.
But I can assert with 100% certainty that Togashi will NOT leave their relationship ambiguous. Maybe it’ll be subtle, but NOT ambiguous. Just like Meruem/Komugi and Yusuke/Keiko.
Killua and Gon’s relationship is the backbone of HxH, and it’s very clear that Togashi’s intent from the beginning of the story was to canonize it as a love story. When Togashi wrote Killua, he incorporated elements of Tanabata, a legend about two lovers, in his story, and made Tanabata his birthday. Togashi queer coded Killua from the beginning, and I honestly doubt that he would never canonize it, when it was his intent to queer code him from the beginning. He made the both of them have an extremely deep relationship, being each other’s most important person. Combine this with all the subtext, and yeah, it’s pretty clear that HxH is a love story.
So yes, Togashi wouldn’t leave ambiguous something he planned from the beginning of the story. Especially since HxH is his first chance at writing a manga and being able to do everything he wants with it. Especially when Togashi’s gay manga got turned down 30 years ago.
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I mentioned Togashi never leaving stuff ambiguous, but rather either putting it plainly or more subtly. And honestly, I’m thinking it’s going to be a mix of both for Killua and Gon. A mix of subtlety and undeniable proof of the romantic nature of their relationship. Exactly like Yusuke and Keiko’s relationship. 
I feel like Killua and Gon’s relationship perfectly mirrors Yusuke and Keiko’s, and I can totally picture it following the same patterns. By having their relationship grow even deeper as they reunite, with no explicit romantic gestures, just deep, deep feelings. Until ultimately, they both confirm it one way or another. 
I could literally picture Gon turning to Killua, telling him out of the blue something they’ll do when they get married, Killua being confused but Gon saying something like “Well, I wanna get married to you Killua. Don’t you want to?” and Killua almost choking but saying that yeah, he’d like that. Plain and simple. No romantic gesture. No kiss, no hand holding, no feelings confession under the stars. Just a mutual assessment of what they both already knew.
But honestly, I’m saying all this to try and be objective, but I’m not in Togashi’s head. Togashi could also very much go absolutely crazy and make Killua and Gon share a kiss, hold hands, affirm their love out loud, Because it’s his first chance at being free to do what he wants with his manga. And because he’s been wanting to draw a gay manga for a while, he might want to emphasize that HxH is queer.
Especially when it seems like Togashi likes to incorporate shoujo elements in his work.
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And as @/sincerelysamedt mentioned in her wonderful post, queer relationships are often dismissed as platonic in media, and that it’s important to overplay it to canonize it efficiently. And Togashi is probably aware of this. Hence Killua’s stuttering, blushing, the constant gay poetic lines Gon tells Killua about how he’s so glad he met him, Killua’s inner monologues comparing Gon to light itself, multiple characters highlighting their mutual love, a date under the stars where they mutually affirm their want to stay together and travel the world while they both blush.........Togashi didn’t have to go THIS hard, but he did.
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These panels highlight the difference between the subtle relationships I talked about above. Correct me if I’m wrong, but I don’t think Togashi represented Yusuke or Keiko having internal monologues about how they wanted to stay with the other forever or poetically comparing each other to light. It proves that while Togashi likes to play it subtle, he's also not afraid to put extremely cliché shoujo tropes and heartfelt moments in his narrative too. Maybe he’s aware that internalized homophobia might pose a problem to the narrative he’s trying to convey, and thus he might be enclined to overplay it. 
When you keep in mind that Togashi most likely wrote Killua and Gon with the intent of making their relationship a love story, you can see that he’s never really written with the intent of being ambiguous or even subtle, providing us with multiple intense scenes of mutual devotion. And that’s one thing that’s leading me to believe he wouldn’t shy away from delivering highly emotional scenes that would canonize their mutual love. Because their relationship has never truly been portrayed as subtle, or ambiguous, it’s just.... developing.
So yeah, it could go either way ! Either Togashi will decide to paint it subtly like every relationship he’s painted in the past, or he’ll either decide to go all out and maybe show us an extremely heartfelt confession under the stars, maybe even an on-screen kiss (the latter option being highly likely considering all the very emotional scenes between them we’ve already had) - (EDIT : i wrote a post on why i believe there’ll be an explicit confession if you want to read it !)
But one thing is certain : it will never stay ambiguous, because Togashi has never painted any of his queer characters or the relationships between his characters as ambiguous, Subtle, yes. Ambiguous, no. 
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ephemerlskies · 4 years ago
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constant craving | jjk
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⇢ pairing: jungkook x reader
⇢ genre: drabble series, angst, unrequited love, idiot!jungkook, idiot!oc, basically everyone's an idiot
⇢ word count: 1.7k
⇢ warnings: unreciprocated pining, explicit language, themes of hopeless romanticism (!!), (slightly) unedited
⇢ summary: your best friend decided to confide in his best friend on how to win his girlfriend back after a fight. you tell him exactly what to say to her, however he is unaware that what you were saying was a sincere delivery of your once undeclared love.
♪ playlist: constant craving - k.d. lang, bad religion - frank ocean, misunderstood - lucky daye, neu roses - daniel caesar ♪
╰ series index: 01 | 02 | 03 | 04 (final)
a/n: hello my little loves!! this was definitely ;) not ;) an impulse write and release ;) ;) sorry for being so inactive lately. i've been focusing on myself (i know how cliche that sounds but it's true). anyway, enjoy this incredibly angsts fic i wrote at 2 am for absolutely no reason at all other than i'm an emotional sadist and a masochist. love u!!!! <3
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part one: control
He was coming over for the third time this week. Third time. Three times is two more times than he'd gone over his girlfriend's house, but you did everything in your power to convince your inconvincible heart that it meant nothing. Friends see each other more than their girlfriends, right?
It was making a racket in your chest, that muscle that strained much harder for a man who had his pumping for the girl of his dreams.
But, he was coming over for the third time this week.
The first time he said this visit ranked, in his words, 'out of the question' on the degree of necessary that he come over and show you Star Wars. You played a good game of reluctance when asking if it was the entire series or just one movie, and in your head, you hoped to God it was the entire series. For him, you'd watch the series four times over if it meant you sat through this outrageously nerdy movie next to the even more outrageously nerdy love of your life.
The second time was particularly funny to you. He called while you were cooking dinner, almost as if he was in stride with you in a way that was an ounce too synchronized to be platonic, and asked if you were whipping up a delicious meal that he could mooch off of. Knowing he was a terrible cook, plus the fact that when he begged so politely you felt your posture unbind into to a puddle, you more than happily obliged.
This time, the circumstances made it harder to say yes, but not yet impossible. And it was a second or two before you heard that knock on the front door that had your once pounding heart come to a complete halt. It was still, waiting for you to make a decision.
Since it was Jungkook, of course, you'd say yes. And your heart would continue beating. Beating, as in sending sharp jabs that stained the inside of your chest with bruises. Beating, as in when the time came, the final blow of your constantly craving heart would devastate your entire being.
"Thank you so much, ___. God, I'm such an idiot." He walked in with all the confidence of someone who was a bit too familiar with your company. Jungkook's feet reintroducing themselves to your floors in the same manner as he would the night before, and the night before that, and the countless nights you kept secured in your collection of memories. As if he belonged there; as if he was coming home.
"An idiot with a great friend." That last word nearly withdrew the bile you had been ever so gracefully holding in.
"Yeah yeah." And he was comfortable with that same word, 'friend', that deepened your bruises into scars. He had absolutely no clue. Idiot. "I can't believe I broke up with her. I was so angry and acted on that instead of logic. Fuck, why would I do that to myself? I love her."
"Well, you never know. Maybe..." You hated yourself for not resisting the selfish temptation that was about to fall from your lips. The words you've been internally screaming to him to leave her and fall in love with you instead were diluted to something much more tame when your tongue formed them into sound.
"Maybe it was for the best. Maybe you guys are better off apart? To, um, grow or whatever."
"No." He said that with too much certainty and too little hesitance and just enough conviction to sink another wound in the organ exhausting itself in your chest. "She's the one. I know it"
"Jungkook."
He looked at you with all the earnestness of a man who carved his utmost and unchanging dedication to her. A look that any love-induced sap would kill for. A look he would never direct towards you.
Your eyes weren't under your control as of now. The glue that held them to his eyes, his lips, his hair, and every other part of him you dreamed of was more than a marathoned yearning. It was an adhesive twelve years in the making, not showing the slightest sign of wearing away.
"The way you love is something to die for..." And then he smiled at you, but still not for you.
You were utterly crushed.
"She'll take you back in a heartbeat. I mean, she has a brain, so of course, she will. Anyone would."
I would.
"I hope you're right." The couch was four feet wide at most, but there was an impressively vast space between you and the man who was sitting next to you. "Can you tell me what to say? You know I suck with words."
"Uh... Yeah. Of course. Anything."
If breaking hearts were a crime, then Jungkook would have much to atone for. You'd be convicted as a willing accomplice for holding on this long. Up until this point, you've let every small glance, every shy smile he sent your way, every eyebrow twitch conveying a meaning only you knew well enough to retrieve him from whatever awkward situation he needed rescuing from, every accidentally brush of his hand against yours, every purposeful embrace that lasted so long your tears stained his right shoulder string you into a knot of miserable, unrequited love.
And up until this point, you had hope he would choose you.
Each ring of his phone worked in tandem to reduce your undying devotion to Jungkook into a compressed seed of denial.
I don't love him. He's just my best friend.
Your pulse pronounced itself loudly in your ears, as a not-so-gentle reminder of how much you hated him for loving him. Somehow, your heart beat faster. Then again, anything was possible when it came to him. Anything except the miraculous event of him hanging up, declaring his love for you, and living in the land of happily ever after that only existed in your deluded imagination.
"Hey Irene! I'm so fucking glad you picked up."
He gave you that look. With the arched eyebrow, his widened doe eyes, and the slightly hung jaw, you read each feature better than words and nodded to signal you knew exactly what he needed.
"I'm sorry about what happened." You said, in a whisper, though the deflated volume of your words carried no implication of the unbridled sincerity sealed in them.
"I'm sorry about what happened." He repeated, laying down that same Irene-contrived smile on you that fostered a smile of your own, knowing fully it surfaced as a reflex from hearing her voice.
"It might be crazy to try this, because I don't know how you feel."
If the thing people say about your life flashing before your eyes during encounters with death, then you were sure your heart was about to consume its last pulse of blood. The scenes of you and Jungkook spending your Friday nights when you were a ripe city dweller in your shoebox apartment doing everything and nothing at all had convinced you that you were certainly about to go into cardiac arrest.
"It might be crazy to say this, because I don't know how you feel." Jungkook was so many things, however emotionally perceptive was not one of them.
"But I love you. I have loved you since the moment I met you." Those words tasted sweet despite fermenting in a chamber of your heart you kept preserved since, as you said, the very moment you met him.
"But I love you. I have loved you since the moment I met you."
"No matter what, I'd choose you. It doesn't matter how mad I am or how annoyed I am, I will choose you because if I know anything in this damn, cruel, punishing world, then I know that I'd rather be angry, annoyed, or anything else with you than without you."
He repeated your words, but dehydrated all of your sentiment from them. You were left with the remnants of the feelings, and none of the words from him you were so desperately starved of. He took them right from your throat, along with the very breath that seemed to keep returning because of Jungkook, molded them into his own, into a sequence of sounds that were meant for Irene. You were left hungry, breathless, and forever wanting.
"No matter what, I'd choose you. It doesn't matter how mad I am or how annoyed I am, I will choose you because if I know anything in this damn, cruel, punishing world, then I know that I'd rather be angry, annoyed, or anything else with you than without you."
Irene must have been smiling right about now. Who wouldn't smile hearing those things from someone like Jungkook?
"Because with you, I'm complete. My story can't end if I'm incomplete. Please, choose me back. Complete me. That's all I ask."
Then, you began to ask yourself another question.
If you make me complete, Jungkook, will my story ever end?
You knew the answer to that. You swore your heart beat in a morse code that told you everything you needed to know.
"Because with you, I'm complete. My story can't end if I'm incomplete. Please, choose me back. Complete me. That's all I ask."
Jungkook looked to you, before Irene could form the proper response, and smiled. It was the third time he smiled at you today because of course, you were keeping track. You knew it was his own physically linguistic version of a 'thank you' or a 'you're a life saver' but somehow, to you, it translated to something similar to a 'goodbye'.
Your legs miraculously rose and carried you to the back porch. The sun was just beginning to dip in the horizon, proliferating a warm orange that was about to subside to an indistinguishable and unpredictable dusk. Whatever color came after the sunset, you were ready to accept it, to memorize how it reflected against a world without the possibility of him. And even though the night will always embody undertones of orange, it was time to focus on the colors around it.
It was time to let go.
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a/n: i might make this into a drabble series!!! if anyone would be interested in that please let me know :)) thank you for readinggggg <3
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spideymarvelws · 4 years ago
Note
can i request Dad! tom being interviewed (on a press junket maybe)by kid(s) but what he didn't know was that he was being interviewed by his own child(ren) 😌 thanks in advance!
Decided to make this in theme with the holidays🥰
Also its cut a bit short cause i feel like any fluff i write is the cringiest shit lmaoo but i hope you enjoy!
Main Masterlist
Warnings : just fluff, a few curse words, tom being a confused father
Word Count : 922
Questions From The Little Guy
Dad!Tom Holland x Reader
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“I’m sorry, what was the question?” Tom asked, uncrossing his legs and leaning forward in his seat.
You watched closely as the interviewer tried his best to hold in his chuckles, smiling brightly as he repeated the question again.
“I asked if you could tell us where you hid the presents this Christmas?” He turned away, letting out a small breath before facing the actor once again, “Did you web them to the roof like last time? Or give them to the avengers to hide them for you?”
You giggled as your watched your husband’s confused face through the monitor. Your two-year old son, Harold sat snuggling in your arms, his chubby, small arms wrapped around your neck while his head laid agaisnt your shoulder, sleeping soundly. You five-year old son, Jonathan, however was listening closly through the bulky headset on his head, barely containing the brown curls that fell in front of his face.
You watched as he stared intently at the screen with Tom’s manager besides him, giggling along with the rest of employees who stood in the room. You were suppose to meet Tom when he came back from work next week, but when you got the call for the idea of an interview, you couldnt pass it up.
“Why would my fans want to know that?” he shook his head back, he let out a breathy laugh.
“Maybe they just want some tips and tricks from they’re very own Spider-Man?”
“To hide presents?” He said in disbelief, “In all honestly I’m pretty sure Peter Parker would be the worst at hiding presents, I mean, we all know what happened with his identity,”
“Answer the question!” Your son pouted, rubbing his palms together, “Mommy!”
“I’m sure he’ll get to it sweetie,” you reassured him, tickling his tummy, “Patience,”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” he mumbled, looking back intently at the screen.
“So sassy,” Tom’s manager whispered to you, giving you a knowing look.
“He grows more like his father every day,” you whispered back, rocking your baby boy in your arms, “I already had to deal with one sassy man child, I don’t know how I’m going to deal with two, let alone three,”
You moved your gaze back to the screen in front of your, watching on as the interviewer, flipped pages in his notepad, looking for another question your son hastily wrote down, “Fair enough, next question?”
You son let out a loud groan, huffing as he feel back agaisnt the cushions. You shook your head, leaning down to swipe a loose strand of hair behind his ear, “Don’t worry sweetie, you’ll get him afterwords,”
“Why-,” he coughed, trying to contain the laughter trying to erupt from his throat, “Why is it bad to say shit and fuck in the house,”
“I’m sorry, WHAT?!”
The next thirty minutes went by in the same fashion. Your husband confused with every question, the interviewer trying his best not to burst into laughter, to the piont where you swear you saw a tear slip from his eyes that he wiped away quickly. And your son sitting down with his chin in his hands, you’ve never seen his still so still or listening so intensively at a screen before, mainly when gifts or presents where metioned (which was often cause the little shit worded the same question differently about ten times)
He was a spiolt little boy that’s for sure.
Harold however was left unbothered in your arms, sleeping soundly with his pacifier in his mouth, being the soundless angel he was.
“Last question Tom,” The interviewer smiled, biting his lip as your husbands eyes blinked rapily, his head leaning in the palm of his hand as if trying to crack a code.
“Please not another one about the fucking presents,” his eyes widened, “Shit, sorry,” he groaned, tossing his head back.
“No, no, no nothing like that,” the interviewer reassured, placing down his notepad, “It’s quite sweet to be honest,”
“That’s what you said about the one with-,” he blushed, “You know what? We’re past that,”
“I’m sure we are,” he said, grinning as he took a breath to ask the last question, “Now, how much do you love your family,”
Tom’s eyes widened with yours, from that piont you knew the gig was up. You watched as the gears in his brain turned, puzzling all the pieces together.
Your son was a curious boy, he tended to ask a lot of things when he first learnt how to speak but the amount only grew his first day of school. But the most frequent one he asked what how much both you and tom loved him. Sure, it was mainly for the attention (since he could never get enough of it) but it warmed both your hearts, hugging him tightly every time he asked it.
“I-,” He said, his mouth hung open, “These weren’t fans were they?”
“Was it obvious?”
Tom sighed, burying his face in his hands as everyone in the room started to laugh, trying to stifle them as much as possible, feeling bad for the father who just spent the last hour dying of embarrassment.
“Where are they?” He grumbled, getting up from the chair.
“In the back room,” his manager came out, crossing her arms over her chest, “Your son is pretty angry with you might I add, the older one that is,”
“I’m gonna kill you,” he mumbled jokingly running towards the door.
“Thank me later for bring your family to you, you twat!”
...
Permanent TagList : @jadegill @sarcastic-sunset-7
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hacked-by-jake · 4 years ago
Text
Was that Jake there 2
Part 1
Pairing: JakexMc
Words: 4,2k
A/N: So, a few days ago I got an absolutely sweet comment from @captainwanderlust78❤️
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Really, you made my last week. And then unfortunately the news came from Everbyte that EP 7 will come later. And actually, there wasn’t a second part planned for this story, but since you wanted one so much, here we are. This is my second attempt, because I wrote a part that I didn’t like. I tried to keep the story a little more quiet this time. Anyway, I hope you like it and apologize for possible mistakes. Oh and Merry Christmas. 🌲❤️
--
"Ready little ones?" Dan asks you and pokes you with his elbow.
"Yes, I’m ready," you answer and look at the big clock in the motel lobby.
Point 12 at midday.
"I’ll be gone," you say goodbye to the others.
"Take care of yourself and call me if you need anything," Richy informs you.
"Yeah, or if he attacks you," hiss Dan.
"Dan" hisses Jessy and steps on his foot.
"Ouch" growls Dan and looks at her accusingly.
Jessy is just ignoring this and calls after you, "See you later".
Slowly but with firm steps you make your way to the elevator.
Immediately the doors open and you get in and press the button for floor three.
The place the place where you meet is going to be a motel room that can’t be used because of renovation.
This is the perfect place to meet Jake.
He will come over the fire escape behind the motel to the third floor and there you meet in the room.
Deciding how and when the meeting will take place was quite awkward.
Yesterday after you guys finished partying at the club, you and Jessy called a cab as planned to take you home to Jessy. Fortunately, everything worked out, until the taxi driver drove to the roadside in the middle of the drive and simply switched off the engine.
Immediately all the alarms were on in your head, and you were ready to get out of the car if necessary.
He turned to you in the back and silently held a note to you.
The paper was folded very small, you opened it and saw many ones and zeros.
0100100001100101011011000110110001101111 010011010110001100001010
Grinning, you rolled your eyes.
"What’s that supposed to mean?" Jessy wonders.
"This is a binary code," you explain to her and pull your phone out of your pocket.
"Ah now I know what that is, of course," she grumbles ironically.
"This is computer language"
You search the Internet for a code translator.
You took a picture of the notes, the translator took the numbers and translated them directly.
"Hello Mc" you read, "Is this serious?".
The driver silently held out a note to you.
You also open this note and moan desperately.
"Can’t he just write normal letters?" you mumble and take a deep breath.
"He’s a computer nerd, they’re all weird," answers the man who was supposed to be just a taxi driver.
01010100 01101111 01101101 01101111 01110010 01110010 01101111 01110111
00001010 01000100 01101111 01101111 01110010 01100010 01100101 01101100 01101100 00001010 01010000 01101100 01100001 01101110
01100110 01101111 01110010
01100111 01110101 01111001
00001010
"Tomorrow morning, doorbell, plan for guy" is the translation.
"Huh?" makes Jessy next to you.
"I’ve got another one," the guy calls again.
"One more? Why not write everything on a piece of paper?"
"Clay said it was too confusing"
"Clay?"
"Oh, Jake, excuse me" he grins and holds out the third note.
01001101 01100101 01100101 01110100 00001010 00110001 00110010
"Meet
12 o'clock
"Midday"
"Okay, so, there’s a man ringing in the morning and he wants me to tell him the plan but the meeting has to be at 12:00," you put it all together.
"Right" the man agrees with you and starts the car again.
"Wait, You knew what that meant?"
"Yes, but we should talk as little as possible, that’s why the notes" he explains to you.
"But I said it out loud"
"Yes, right"
After that, he didn’t speak, but at least you didn’t have to pay.
Well, and then 20 minutes later, you and Jessy took the next taxi back to Roger’s garage, and there you all met again to work out the plan.
Lilly told Mrs Walter she didn’t have to work today. Lilly would take her shift and the owner should have a nice day with Alfie.
After a little persuasion it worked and Lilly is the only one who has to work.
There are only 13 rooms occupied in the entire motel, and only two of them are on the third floor, so the room with the renovation fits best.
This morning at 7 o'clock, a flower messenger rang at Jessy’s house, and you stared at the roses and then at the man.
"Gohstbusters" he said and you understood what to do.
You gave him a note stating the plan for the meeting.
However, written in hieroglyphs.
But there is also a translator on the Internet.
The elevator doors open and you look around.
No one is to be seen so you make yourself on the way to the room which is at the very end of the corridor.
With the key card you got from Lilly, you can open the door, hold the card against the sensor and the door cracks quietly. You press the door inwards and notice that there’s light on.
However, of course you did not expect that a man sitting in the room on the desk chair.
"Oh, God," you jump back a step.
The man looks up and immediately looks worried.
"Oh my God," you murmur as you realizes it’s just Jake.
Completely out of breath, you lean with your hands on your knees and breathe deeply.
"Oh shit, MC, I didn’t mean to." He murmurs and comes up to you.
You laugh in agony and grin forced.
"Ha uhm already okay, all right, I was not scared".
A small but quiet laugh comes from Jake’s mouth.
He’s going to the side so you can come in. He locks the door behind you.
"How did you get in here?" You ask and try to calm your heart that feels like it’s jumping out of your chest.
"The doors are not safe for hackers," he explains, sitting back on the chair.
"You hacked a motel door?" you ask amused.
"Yes, you weren’t there yet, but I couldn’t stay in front of the door. That would have been more than conspicuous," he argues.
You just shake your head and let yourself fall on the bed. For a moment it is quiet, only the ticking of the clock can be heard.
"Thank you for coming," you speak in silence.
"Hm yes" is the answer.
"You’re still against it, aren’t you?" you ask unsure.
"MC, please don’t think I wouldn’t want to see you too, but I won’t be reassured until you’re safe again," he explains.
"How are you?" you change the subject.
"I am fine, and you?"
You roll your eyes, "Don’t tell me everything at once," you say ironically.
A smile appears on his face.
"Honestly not so good" he admits.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
"No, it’s okay" he declines. You pull up an eyebrow and you look at him in a challenging way, "Okay, then in a different way. Tell me what’s going on," you challenge him and leave no room for a negative answer.
You point to the bed next to you and signal him to sit next to you.
He thinks briefly but then does what you want
"Well, it’s all pretty stressful right now," he starts.
"Okay good, and keep going" attentively you look at him.
He finally surrenders and begins to report.
"There were some problems that we didn’t expect, they almost caught us. We could only cross a border with a lot of luck and help, but that took us quite some time. And then I made a stupid mistake, the pursuers were able to intercept our signal. As a result, I had to burn my laptop and cell phone so that nothing could be found.
That took us some time too. The agents are much better than I thought, they are much too fast and much too good and that makes it really hard for me. And for the others, too. And what’s even harder is, that I can’t write to you anymore. I dont know how far along you are, or if you have new clues, new key results, how far along you are with Hannah, but even worse, I don’t know how you’re doing. How you feel or if you have problems, and that makes my head full all day with questions that revolve around you. Sometimes we manage to access the Internet for a short time through public computers in libraries or cafes. But contacting you would be too dangerous. I can delete a lot of data from the system but as I said, the agents are better than I thought and unfortunately we do not know exactly how well and how much they can get back. I would have to take every computer with me and burn it down, but that would be even worse if computers were suddenly missing everywhere. It’s shitty MC, I’m honest, I hate this situation, but it’s my own fault"
exhausted, he rubs his face.
Wow okay, that was very honest.
Worried you look at him.
You could say things like "everything’s gonna be okay" or "it’s not your fault." But let’s face it, it’s not helping anyone. So the only logical way is to just hug him tight, and that’s exactly what you’re doing.
You slide a little closer to him and wrap your arms around his upper body and lean your head against his shoulder. Unlike yesterday, he does not tense himself but also gently lays his arms around your body. Immediately, its smell rises in your nose and tingles through your body. You notice how relief spreads in your body. Relief that he’s doing reasonably well, that he’s still free, that he’s here with you, that he’s hugging you, too. But above all, relief because it feels like every pressure is dropping from you, all the pressure of the last few weeks. The pressure because of Hannah, the pressure because of the man without a face, and of course the pressure that something might have happened to Jake. At least for a brief moment, everything is fine, and that makes you happy. And if you think about he’s gonna have to leave soon, you’re gonna get sick. But you don’t want to think about the negative things now, you just want to enjoy the moment, just a brief moment of rest.
You have closed your eyes and hear Jake’s heart beat rhythmically, which also calms you down. You remove an arm from his body and place your hand on his left chest. You can feel his heart just coming out of rhythm and then beating a little faster than before. This also makes your heart beat a little faster.
"You Jake?" you whisper softly.
"Mhh?" he makes a questioning sound.
"Who are the others?"
"They’re familiar to me. The three were also involved in the government project and now they are also in danger," he says briefly.
"Okay?" your voice sounds questioning.
"We know each other from different chat portals for hackers"
Thus, all your questions were answered. For this moment.
Slowly you break away from each other, even if you don’t want to, but it’s no use.
"I still have to thank Lilly and you" he addresses your #IamJake action.
"You don’t have to thank either of us, Lilly owed it to both of us, and I do it because I want,"  you assure him.
"But still, it’s not understandable, I hope it will help us. The idea was really good. The others were quite fascinated when they saw this, "he praises you and his half-sister.
"You deserve it, too, Jake," you reaffirm your action even more.
Ironically he laughs, "with what?"
"In which you are, and also do everything to find Hannah, even if she doesn’t know you’re her half-brother. And Lilly also understood that we both just wanted to help."
"That might have been a little selfish of me. I just wanted you guys to make up because I don’t know where this is going with the two of us. And I wanted to take the opportunity early" he confesses.
"I can live with that" a little smile is on your face.
He doesn’t know where this is going with us, and he wanted you and his half-sister to make up.
"I’m sorry, MC but -" he starts.
You sigh, "but we still have something to discuss," you finish his sentence.
"I’m sorry, but we only charged three hours at the most, then I have to go "he looks at you apologetically.
"It’s okay, let’s not talk about it now".
You really don’t want to talk about it right now. The conversation will come soon enough. Jake gets his backpack on the desk and takes out his laptop.
Then he sits down next to you again and asks you to give him your phone.
Quickly, a connection is established and the screen of your phone is displayed on the laptop.
And so you begin to discuss everything that’s happened since he was gone.
-
By now you had arrived at Lilly’s and your chat.
"You really called her Duskwood’s worst legend?" Jake asks a little overwhelmed if he can laugh about it.
"Um, I was a little mad," you smile innocently at him.
"Remind me not to argue with you" he looks at you briefly from the side and grins crooked.
"I like to argue sometimes" challenging, you look at him.
"Yes, I noticed that, so we prefer not to"
Quietly, he continues to read the chat while you wait to see if he has any questions.
From the side you see his eyes suddenly get a little bigger and he swallows.
"Everything okay?" you ask him immediately.
"So we’re in love?" he asks teasingly.
It takes a short time to remember the message, immediately you get warm and your cheeks turn red.
Then you laugh a little hysterical.
"Um, haha that- that, uhm yes..." you stutter.
Jake raises an eyebrow.
"Um, yeah, I can explain that," nervously you start playing with your hands and scratching your neck in turns.
"Uhm, so - on that point I didn’t know, uhm, what relationship you and Lilly have. So this - I didn’t know you both were siblings, and then I kind of wanted to piss them off. Well, I- I thought it might upset Lilly or something".
You don’t even know if that’s true, you just said it without thinking. Maybe it’s true, but he doesn’t want anyone know it, or it‘s just going too fast for him.
You wish for nothing more than for the floor to swallow you.
"I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have written that. I hope I didn’t make you feel stupid or anything, that’s the last thing I want, can we just forget about it?" you murmur in shame.
You look at the tips of your shoes so you don’t have to look at Jake.
"Lilly was right," Jake murmurs into the unpleasant silence.
"I didn’t like that they voted against you in the vote. They treated you unfairly, I didn’t like that at all," he admits, "I felt the need to at least scare the others. Which was not quite okay, but I couldn’t watch them treat you like this".
You’re looking at him.
"It was for Hannah, because you will be the key, but I could have just written a message, but that was not enough for me".
You can’t hold back a slight grin.
"Thank you" is all you can say.
"Is it true?" he harks curiously.
"Huh? What?" you act like you didn’t understand his question
"Well, what you wrote to Lilly"
"You know I like you," you confirm.
In response, you get just another big smile from Jake as he just keeps looking at the screen.
However, he omits the end of the chat, at the point where you got the video.
He knows probably after that it’s about his family.
"I’m very proud of you MC" he starts to talk, "you two worked really well together and I’m amazed how well you were able to solve the puzzles".
A little shy about his praise, you just thanked him.
Exhausted, you fall back on the bed.
Jake closes his laptop, puts it back in his pocket and then slowly lies down next to you.
"I haven’t asked you how you are actually doing" he notes a little depressed.
"At least better than in the last few weeks. It’s all very exhausting, but I can do it" you mumble and turn your head to the left so you can look at him.
His page profile is really beautiful.
"We met at a very strange time," Jake mutters, and he also turns his head in your direction.
For a moment, you look at each other silently.
"You are so wonderful and especially MC, do you know that?" he breathes.
"I don’t know, is that me?" you ask quietly.
"So wonderful that I don’t understand why you’re lying here with me"
"Maybe because you’re special, too, Jake. And even more wonderful than all the people I’ve met so far" you reciprocate his sweet compliment and mean every word seriously.
"Are you sure about this?"
"To 100 percent"
"You deserve someone better than me," he sighs.
"Stop lying," you grinned.
Now you both look at each other silently again, only the second hand and the birds from outside can be heard.
Slowly Jake raises a  hand and wipes a strand of hair from your face.
You take his hand in yours and you cross your fingers with each other.
Jake looks thoughtfully at your hands.
"It’s dangerous what we’re doing here," he mutters.
"You can take that little break, Jake. That's okay," you calm him down.
"Maybe, but it’s dangerous to be here with you. You get such big problems if the persecutors find out you know me," he easily squeezes your hand.
"Jake, don’t worry about it. I know who I’m dealing with and I know it can end badly. But that’s why I don’t care, if we don’t risk it now, it may be too late. And then we’ll never know if it would’ve worked.
At the moment everything is going crazy, so why not at least do what you want for a short time?"
"You should become a motivational trainer" he suggests for fun.
"Do you think? Did my speech help?"
"I agree with your words, but I have so much more to lose. My freedom and looking for Hannah, but those are just the little things. The biggest problem is that I could never live with myself if you got problems just because I was selfish. Against these problems the man without face is nothing, MC. If you go to jail because of me, I could never forgive myself, you understand. And that’s my problem, I don’t know if I can risk it, I don’t want to ruin your whole life.
You made new friends here, when Hannah gets back, you’ll be completely happy, but then there’s me. The guy who runs from the government, that’s not what you deserve", he tries desperately to explain.
"That’s also why I don’t tell you what exactly I did, why I tell you as little as possible. You can’t say anything if you know nothing no matter what they do, you don’t know it. If the agents find you, they definitely do a lie-detector test with you, and hopefully, they won’t do any more than that. But if you don’t know anything, you’re not in danger either."
"I understand your point, I understand your worries and your fear, but, Jake, I’m aware of all of this. I know what happens if you and I can be connected, but I accept it for you and for Hannah."
"But that’s the thing, you shouldn’t put yourself in danger for this, not even for Hannah. And you being in Duskwood is dangerous enough, which is why I’m here with you, because it’s too dangerous."
You pull up an eyebrow and look skeptical.
"You don’t have to take care of me.What   should happen to me? I won’t be alone.One of the others will always be with me. The man without a face can’t do anything to me, "you calm him down.
"I know, I know, but I’m still worried about you"
"But there’s nothing you can do about it, Jake. And the rest of the time we have left, we shouldn’t discuss things we can’t influence. None of us can change the situation"
"I don’t like that you’re right again" he grumbles what makes you smile.
"Do you know I’m happy right now?" you tell him softly, "because of you."
"Why?"
"Because I know you’re doing reasonably well, and because you’re here with me.
And you’re risking your freedom right now because I wished for this meeting. Then how could I not trust you, Jake? You deserve me to be here with you. And that’s also one reason why I don’t care if they get me, you confided in me even though you’re in a difficult time. You trusted me and that’s why I trust you" to support your words, you put his hand on your lips and breathe a short kiss on the back of his hand.
Like he’s petrified, he’s watching you.
"I think I’m really in love," he whispers.
"And I think I’m in love with you too" you giggle softly.
Minimally you slide closer to him and lean slightly with your elbow on the bed to push you a bit upwards.
As if he were considering whether this is a good idea, he eventually slips closer to you, but a lot more than you.
He also leans on the bed to be back on your height, your hands remain united all the time.
His thumb gently caresses the back of your hand.
Not ten centimeters separates your faces from each other.
Jake takes the initiative and leans even further up so that your faces almost touches. You feel his breath on your skin and your body is flooded with excitement. It’s like they just touched by accident.
Slowly, your faces move towards each other until your lips gently touch. But it’s enough to light a fire in you and get Jake to press his lips on yours.
Immediately you close your eyes and return the kiss with as much feeling as he did. You can’t control yourself and grin into the kiss, which also makes Jake smile.
Jake pulls you up to you and pushes you slightly on the bed so you can use your hands more.
But just as quickly the kiss becomes passionate again. A thousand different feelings are buzzing in your head. Despair, fear, happiness, contentment. And that is reflected in your kiss.
Now your two hands separate from each other and Jake wraps both arms around your upper body. You feel a little dizzy and feel like everything is spinning even if you have your eyes closed. Your body tries to cope with all the feelings of happiness and seems to be overwhelmed. Actually, it’s no wonder. You’ve never longed so much for closeness but with Jake now, it’s very different. The kiss last night,
it was beautiful. But that was a very different situation than it is now.you were overwhelmed and a little drunk. First the warm air in the club, then Phil, then suddenly Jake, a kiss, a deal, and then a weird cab driver. All quite a lot at once, but now you can enjoy the kiss, and it’s a very different one from yesterday. This is a relief for both of you, and the beginning of something greater, but also the beginning of an even more stressful time than before. 'Cause how you’re supposed to let Jake go right now, you absolutely don’t know.
You feel like your eyes are filling with tears because of the emotional overload that is currently running through your body. And unfortunately, you two seem to be really starting to have trouble breathing, so you’re must breaking up with each other with a heavy heart. Absolutely out of breath, Jake leans his forehead against yours.
"If the persecutors find me, beat me, okay?" he breathes hard. "Okay, but why?" you giggle.
"Because then I screwed up to be able to kiss you all the time."
In response, you laugh and give him another kiss. You could lie there forever like right now, but Jake’s phone suddenly starts ringing. Annoyed, he rolls his eyes but then stands up from the bed.He gets his cell phone out of his pocket and accepts the call. Instantly you assume the worst. The others are calling to tell him they have to leave. You don’t know how to react and your hands start to shake. His answers leave no room to speculate about what it’s all about, and his facial expressions and posture remain neutral. Shortly after he finishes the phone call, he blows out air and turns to you. You’re already struggling with the tears in your eyes as Jake starts smiling." Well, I think we need to rent a room at the motel."
Confused you look at him, "W-what do you mean?"
"We’ll be safe for the next few days, someone pretending to be me tried to hack the CIA. They think they’ve arrested me"
------
extra material:
"That’s her," he says in a much too high tone. "It’s an honor to finally meet you, I feel like I know you better than Jake knows you. Can you actually scan my personality? Jake always tells me that you are really good at seeing through people and assess" he babbles.
"Oh, is he telling you this?" you ask and grin at Jake.
"Oh yes, if you knew, When he can’t sleep, he tells a lot about you. He doesn’t usually talk that much in a year," giggles Jake’s buddy.
"Max" hisses Jake and looks at him hard.
"And he’s always telling you how impressive you are, and that he’s amazed you don’t have a problem with him being a hacker. And how sweet you are."
"Okay, that’s enough" growls Jake and pushes him. The pushed one begins to laugh and raises his hands up defensively.
"Do you tell such things?" you look amused at him.  "Forget that, please," he grumbles.  "Oh, I’ll never be able to forget that, but to be fair, I’m thrilled with you, too. And you don’t look bad either." You grin cheekily at him.
--
Masterlist🌹🎭
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yellowocaballero · 4 years ago
Text
Human Relations Snippet: Tim teaches Jon the internet and odious goats are sacrificed to the cult of Bezos
There’s no reason for this to exist. I was rereading a bit of HR and I saw a throwaway joke about Jon wanting to buy Martin a Portal Gun. I started wondering about how that would even work. The answer is, obviously, a 200 year old man squinting at a computer screen wondering why there’s so many horny singles in his area. I get possessed by demons easily, so I took three hours out of writing my daemon au and wrote this instead. Bon Appetit. 
(Edit, quick clarification: I think that Jon would refuse to use the name for the Beholding that Smirke made up, and although all of this exists in my head and you guys don’t know this, there was a lot of tension between Jon and Jonah’s ‘circle’. So Jon hated Smirke and thought he was a hack. He uses Smirke’s terms to others sometimes for ease of understanding or in deference to Jonah (:/) but I think that mentally he mainly calls the Beholding his own name, The Witness. It rings of that personal and intimate connection Jon and the Beholding has. Anyway, onto the story.)
After one hour in anguished uncertainty, fifty popups that advised Jon of very many ‘hot singles in his area’, six separate sites that Jon’s God had to inform him were covers for thieves that stole money from you, and a very confusing retreat to Jon’s favorite internet page ‘Wikipedia’ as to what an Amazon was, Jon had given up.
Normally this was where he asked one of his personal assistants for help. Normally, he wouldn’t even be trying, and he would have just told one of them to do it. This was how Jon had cunningly mostly avoided using computers for the past twenty years. Some endeavors were unavoidable, and Jon was proud to say that he mastered email in 2010. Or was it 2008? He liked to think it was 2006, but it was possible...never mind. If it was important, the Witness would tell him. 
After one hour in anguished uncertainty, fifty popups that advised Jon of very many ‘hot singles in his area’, six separate sites that Jon’s God had to inform him were covers for thieves that stole money from you, and a very confusing retreat to Jon’s favorite internet page ‘Wikipedia’ as to what an Amazon was, Jon had given up.
Normally this was where he asked one of his personal assistants for help. Normally, he wouldn’t even be trying, and he would have just told one of them to do it. This was how Jon had cunningly mostly avoided using computers for the past twenty years. Some endeavors were unavoidable, and Jon was proud to say that he mastered email in 2010. Or was it 2008? He liked to think it was 2006, but it was possible...never mind. If it was important, the Witness would tell him.
Peter Lukas was right on almost nothing, Jon thought disgruntledly as he slammed his laptop shut - including in his taste of men, company, philosophies, men, patron deities, professions, and men - but he was right in his proclamation that the internet was the degradation of society. Not that he hadn’t sacrificed his morality and sold out, feeding his patron through something called “incel forums” and “Reddit”. Between him, Jonah’s “Excel spreadsheets” and “TurboTax”, and Annabelle Cane’s ridiculous “MMO guilds”, the Society was filling with computer geeks. Jon could always read the wind: he had to keep up, and quickly. 
Besides, Martin had kindly educated him on how it was almost unheard of for a young man like Jon to not understand how to work that Goggle thing. Giggle? Martin was very streetwise and was one of the most insightful people Jon had ever known, he was definitely right. 
Which is why he had to buy him this “Portal Gun” that he wanted. He had even shown Jon the website! And if Jon was in desperate times trying to navigate these confusing webpages entirely with URLs he memorized, then he would take desperate measures!
“I’m going down to the Archives,” Jon said, slithering off the couch and clutching his laptop to chest. Jonah had bought it for him. He appeared surprised that Jon was using it. “I may not be back for a while. I need...a book.”
Jonah didn’t look away from his own infernal machine. It seemed he was on that ‘Excel’ program again. Was it one of those ‘video games’ he kept hearing about? “Do I want to know what you were doing on that laptop.”
“Reading Wikipedia,” Jon said immediately, and somewhat defensively. Jon had discovered Wikipedia in 2001 before promptly funding it and throwing his weight behind its development. He had spent a solid five years convinced a computer was a kind of electronic screen that let you read digital Encyclopedia pages, like in Star Trek. He’d seen Star Trek. Georgie made him. “Did you know that -”
“Yes, yes, have fun. Haven’t you read that entire site already?”
“Not even,” Jon said defensively. “I can’t just sit and read through entire Encyclopedias anymore, Jonah. We know more things now.”
“What a way to describe the last two hundred years,” Jonah said, not even looking away from his computer. “We know more things. Never change, Jon.”
“You’re the one who never changes,” Jon grumbled. But it was a weak comeback, and considering his brand new delightfully short stature somewhat untrue, so Jon breezed out of Jonah’s office with full knowledge that he’d think of a better comeback halfway down the steps to the Archives.
In fact, it wasn’t until he was at the door, and by then he felt stupid for losing a point against Jonah anyway. He easily opened the door, stepping inside and quickly bee-lining for Sasha’s office. Her burgeoning powers were wonderfully flowing in the shape of access to and understanding of technology. He had never seen such gratuitous breeches of privacy as she casually committed. Every day Jon was validated in his decision to save her from the Stranger. A balance, an equal yet opposite Archivist from Jon, would be invaluable. Not that Jonah and Jon weren’t their own yin and yang, but Jonah’s powers were paltry and out-of-date. Mind reading and spying through iconography was so 1960. They needed fresh blood. 
Sasha had been a wonderful choice, and Jon didn’t regret choosing her to act as saviour. Most of the time. Some of the time she -
“She’s not in.”
Jon’s fist halted in front of the door, about to sharply rap on her office door. He turned around to actually look through the bullpen, only to see that Timothy was sitting in his chair chewing a sandwich. Somehow angrily. Definitely suspiciously. 
“Are you sure?” Jon asked dubiously. “Because you’ve lied about this before.”
“Because you should stop coming down here and bothering her.” Timothy balled the saran wrap in his hand and dunked it in the trash can, somehow undoubtedly giving the impression that he wished it was Jon’s head. “Just bugger off.”
Someone was in a snit. Normally Timothy wasn’t this hostile. Jon had thought that learning his name might make him less mean, but it did little to help. But when Jon looked around he didn’t see Martin, and a quick check assured him that both Sasha and Martin were having lunch at their favorite deli and engaging in that plotting hobby they both enjoyed. Timothy had elected to stay behind, stewing in his own angry and paranoid juices. 
He would have to do this with Martin out of the Archives...and he really wanted to take care of this now so Martin would get it before the weekend...and it wasn’t as if Jon was scared of this boy he was one hundred and seventy years older than…
“Uh,” Jon said intelligently, “can you help me with...something…”
Timothy’s face twisted in a novel combination of surprise and disgust. “What,” he sneered, “your evil fear god or whatever can’t figure it out for you?”
“I don’t need others to think for me,” Jon said stiffly. It was something he’d had to say far too many times. “The Witness is less helpful with...troubleshooting...look, do you know how to work a computer?”
Timothy stared at him blankly. “Like, at all?”
“I’m trying to buy Martin this toy he desires,” Jon said desperately. Fuck it all, he walked over and sat down in the chair next to Tim’s desk. He pulled a little bit closer, placing his laptop on Tim’s desk, and ignored the way the other man leaned away. “But whenever I try I keep on seeing alerts about hot singles. I’m not interested in young women, I just need to buy a ‘Portal Gun’. Do you know what a Portal Gun is?”
Timothy continued staring at him, eyebrows raised. Clearly involuntarily, so quick that he may not even have noticed, one corner of his lips was ticking upwards into a smile. 
“How many credit card scams have you fallen for?”
“Absolutely none,” Jon said, very quickly. He pulled out his credit card, placing it on the table. He knew a credit card was involved, although he didn’t know how. “What do I do? Do I swipe it? Is there a port?” He picked up the laptop and squinted at its sides, looking for a port. “I wanted to ask Sasha for help, since she’s the expert in hacking, but surely you know the basics?”
“I mean...I can’t, like, code, but yeah, I can work Amazon.” Timothy carefully opened the laptop, watching the display light up. He effortlessly navigated to an icon on the screen, clicking it open. 
“That’s not right,” Jon said urgently. “You’re supposed to press the E.”
“I do not want to know how many toolbars you have,” Timothy said bluntly. “We’re using Chrome. That’s another way to look at the Internet.” He rubbed his hands together. “Yeah, I got a grandmother, we can do this.”
Jon perked up. “So you’ll help?”
Went unsaid: even though you hate me?
“Whatever,” Timothy grumbled. Jon decided not to press his luck. 
Jon decided that he liked the Chrome better than the Internet Explorer, because it was simpler and Google was on the first page. Tim rapidly typed on ‘Amazon.com’ into the search bar and easily scrolled through the very busy and picture filled page that immediately popped up. Why was everything so fast? Maybe this was why the young people had no attention span: these pages just came up immediately. No flipping for indices for finding anything in phone books. 
“Right. What was it, a Portal Gun? Like from the game?”
“A board game?”
“Video game.”
“Like on a VHS…?”
“Right.” Tim pinched the bridge of his nose. “You know, Sasha said that you’re one of the most famous sociologists and anthropologists in British history.”
“I am extremely intelligent, Timothy, and I won’t abide any insinuation otherwise,” Jon said curtly. “I cannot be expected to keep constant track every time there’s another - iPhone or whatever. You have teenagers in your family, correct? Do you always know what they’re talking about? That’s, what, a twenty year age gap? Multiply that by ten.”
That shut him up. Timothy sighed again, much more aggressively, but he clicked the white bar and typed in ‘portal gun’ anyway. “Right. Not fucking apologizing, but right. I still don’t fucking know what ‘Twitch’ is.”
“It’s a brief spasmodic contraction of the muscle fibers,” Jon said helpfully. “Fascinatingly, this phenomenon was first observed in frog’s legs before I was even born in 1780, by Luigi Galvani. Erudite man, by the way, but he couldn’t hold his liquor. It was the birth of the study of bioelectricity, although the exact mechanism of muscle contraction eluded scientists for years.”
“Never mind.” Timothy sighed again, the perfect mix of aggravated and long-suffering. It seemed to be the man’s two favorite emotions. “My grandmother has a PhD and she still can’t figure out her cell, either. We had to get her a Jitterbug.”
Amazon, as Timothy explained, was a kind of shopping mall, except you could pick out what you wanted by its picture and have the shopping mall pack it up and send it to you. Jon didn’t quite understand why people preferred this to just going to a shop yourself, seeing as you could get it immediately instead of with a three or four day turnaround, but Tim explained that Amazon was cheaper, had a wider selection, and didn’t make you get off the couch.
“Oh,” Jon said, finally getting it, “this follows the economic model of large scale businesses underpricing their products to undercut smaller businesses in the area, driving them out of business until they hold monopoly over the market and can raise their prices without worrying about staying competitive.”
Timothy stared at him. 
“I mean,” he said, “I guess?”
“This explains why my Alexa project was successful so quickly,” Jon mused. “With a lack of competition or alternatives, consumers are more likely to accept the dramatic invasions of privacy as normal. Normalizing intrusions into privacy took ages, but my early efforts paid off very well. The Ring doorbell was even better, along with the line of security and home protection systems. We’re now working on live streamed 24/7 surveillance to social media platforms.”
Timothy stared at him further. 
Finally, he said, “Alexa was...you?”
“Of course,” Jon said, baffled. Who else would it be? “I gave Jeff the idea and convinced him it would be profitable. I didn’t understand the whole mechanics of it, but once I gave Jeff a vision from the Witness he was eager to implement the divinely inspired spyware.”
Timothy continued to stare. 
“The evil fear god controls Jeff Bezos.”
“He thinks I’m a prophet, actually,” Jon said helpfully. “I let him become Cardinal of the imaginary cult in exchange for funding some of my more esoteric programs. Had him sacrifice a goat and everything, it was great.” At Timothy’s alarmed look, Jon was quick to elaborate, “It was the most evil goat you’ve met in your life. Morally odious.”
“...for my sanity I’m going to pretend that you said none of that.”
In retrospect, although Timothy had worked at the Institute for a few years, it did take quite a bit of time to acclimate to the fact that the Avatars permanently shaped the shape of human existence in order to better feed their gods. Jon knew better than anyone: when humanity made gods, and gods made man, and man made gods...the feedback loop could self-perpetuate for years. Eternity, if needed. 
But they had no luck on ‘Amazon’. With Jon’s eidetic memory he was able to easily pick out the one that looked most similar to the one that Martin had showed him, but all of the little toy guns were for someone named ‘Rick’. Then Timothy took twenty laborious minutes explaining the entire plot of ‘Rick & Morty’ to him, which Jon patiently sat through. 
“I think young people today deeply enjoy explaining media,” Jon said, once Timothy finished telling him the funny jokes. “I’m very interested in your interests, Timothy.”
“You are so fucking condescending. And please call me Tim, you’re sounding even more like my grandmother.” When Jon brightened, Tim - Tim! - quickly said, “This does not mean we are friends.”
Granted, Jon had never once in his life gave a shit about making friends, but he felt as if he should be making more of an effort with Tim. He was a sort of supernatural brother in law, wasn’t he? Although Sasha perhaps Sasha was more of a favored niece. At least, he would be, if today’s generation found some morality and stopped living in sin. 
Good lord. Now he was sounding like Jonah. Georgie used to joke that he was born in the wrong generation - he should have been born a 17th century Puritan instead. Jon found it a very funny joke. Jonah did not. 
“Are there any other shopping websites?” Jon asked finally, after Amazon failed them. He’d have to call up Jeff later and complain. “Or is this the only one?”
Tim sighed. “Let’s check Google.”
Quickly and efficiently, yet with many lightning fast detours, Tim found another site called ‘eBay’ - pronounced ‘e-Bay’, not ‘ehbay’ - that listed off exactly what they needed. They weren’t under the toy section, instead listed as something called ‘cosplay’, but Tim seemed highly resistant to explaining that one, so he dropped it. 
They picked a likely looking white toy gun that looked the most similar to the one that Martin had liked and Tim talked Jon through punching in the numbers on his card into the website and sorting through the billing and shipping information. Tim helpfully took down the numbers on his card to file later. 
“And...done!” Tim said, pressing a button and leaning back. “That wasn’t so bad, was it?”
“It was ten times as complicated as I thought it would be,” Jon assured him, “but also much more fun. What else can you buy online?”
“Oh, god. What can’t you buy.”
Jon brightened. “Can you buy books?”
“Old Gertrude used to buy Leitners on eBay,” Tim said dully, “so yeah, sure, why not.”
Jon stared at his computer. He carefully navigated the mouse to the big red x and clicked out of the internet browser. “That’s enough of eBay, then, I think.”
Guess he would have to stick to buying Leitners in person. It was no good buying fucked up books from sketchy sources. Always stick to people you trusted, or at least trusted to be themselves. Mikaele was Jon’s favorite supplier since the kid Leitner disappeared, and they had a pleasant working relationship. Mikaele shared his grandfather’s stories about the history and culture of the Maori, and Jon told him which of his haunted artifacts would be the most helpful in the imminent apocalypse. 
“Well,” Tim said finally, gently pushing Jon’s laptop away, “that was...something, great bonding session with my local supervillain, please run back to Elias and bother him instead.”
“You were very helpful, Mr. Stoker,” Jon said, as professionally yet paternally as possible. Tim was six years older than his body, so he’s not sure how it came off, but the touch of grey at his temples helped with the dignified air. “And as soon as you start acting like a man and propose to my Archivist, you’ll make an excellent brother in law -”
“Uh, excuse me?”
Jon spun around in his chair to see Sasha and Martin standing at the door, holding doggy bags and looking somewhat flummoxed. Probably confused at the sight of him and Tim having a civil conversation, which admittedly had never happened before. Possibly also confused at how completely mortified Tim looked. 
“Who said anything about proposing?” Sasha asked incredulously. “Tim, are you -”
“No! No, god no!” Tim stood up quickly, holding his hands out as if he was placating a raging bull. “Nobody’s been saying anything - I would never do that to you -”
“Oh,” Sasha said frostily, crossing her arms and letting the bags swing, “would you.”
That was a domestic Jon should stay out of, even though he definitely caused it. He and Martin sidled away in tandem, huddling near the back of the Archives as Tim frantically pled for his life. 
Sneakily, Jon glanced at Martin out of the corner of his eye. He looked happy. Happy, and just as stressed as he always looked - Jon had never known Martin when he wasn’t constantly stressed out, and he was more than aware that it was his fault. 
He looked good, too. Really nice, broad jawline that gave his face a friendly round shape. Just friendly and round in general, it was really handsome. His hair was as nicely short and ruffles as ever. The big glasses were super stylish, and really framed his face well. Really big, broad hands. Jon, who had always been so poky and tall and thin and gaunt, like some kind of haunted scarecrow that lurked through the corners of time, was envious. He wanted some of that softness and gentleness. Really, he wanted some of Martin’s -
“So what were you and Tim doing?” Martin asked. “I didn’t know you knew he existed.”
“You told me his name,” Jon said anxiously. “I don’t forget the things you tell me, you know.”
Martin smiled shyly and him, and Jon found himself smiling back. “It’s pretty good for my ego to hear that I have something to teach the immortal genius.”
“I don’t know,” Jon said, as Sasha yelled in the background, “I’ve been learning a lot lately.”
“Really?” Martin teased. “Anything interesting?”
“Oh,” Jon said, watching the yellow fluorescent light cast Martin’s dim smile in soft relief, “I can think of a few things.”
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lobakmerahs · 4 years ago
Text
One: Painting and Its Secrets
Summary: This series is about Levi’s slow burn relationship with the reader who is not only a squad leader but a spy who works under Scouts Regiment.
Warning: mentions of death
A/n: I hope you, whoever you are that will read my series will enjoy it as much as I do when I wrote it. Thanks and have a pleasant reading! :)
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~ 🎨
3 weeks before...
A blond platinum wig in a pixie cut, button down shirt in beige, a dark brown suspenders, a pair of pants in olive green with a jacket in the same colour. Last but not least a black fedora on top of the head. You stared at your reflection in the mirror, making sure that you looked completely different from the real you at the same time not wanting the disguise you were wearing would catch unnecessary attention. After you were fully satisfied with your look, you took your steps outside your little home.
It was supposedly your off day and you were strolling at the Stohess District and went to buy a newspaper before taking your seat at an empty bench while facing the river. After a few moments had passed, you glanced at your watch and stood up to head to your destination. 
Hans Art Gallery. You were on time when you stood in front of the art shop as the business was just begun and you were the first one to enter. 
“Good morning and welcome to Hans Art Gallery. Is there anything that I can help you, Mrs?,” the gentleman asked. 
“A bouquet of tulips for the man with the black shoes.” You answered to the gentleman who was not wearing a pair of black shoes but upon hearing your sentence and clearly understood your code, he went to the back of the gallery before returned to you and handed the canvas piece that was neatly wrapped with an oil paper. 
You calmly walked to your home and naturally looked around you to make sure no one was tailing before you entered your house and produced a soft click sound as you locked the wooden door behind you. You didn’t go straight to your room, instead you climbed to the attic and yet again locked the door. Slowly you unwrapped the frame and brought out your forceps as well as your scalpels, no need to ask how did you get those. The canvas held a drawing of an evening sky which was rich with every shades of orange colour capturing the beauty of the sunset, it seemed like it could bring calmness to whoever that laid their eyes on it, but what people didn’t know, didn’t have to know as well as didn’t have the right to know was what lied beneath the drawing. Yes, the drawing was undeniably beautiful, it was made by none other than one of your assets in the Wall Sina that disguised as an art dealer among the nobles. The said asset had planted a few layers of documents under his drawing which was the main reason you were about to form a surgery on the work of art. Meticulously, you ran your scalpel on the border of the drawing, next you brushed your thumb along the already cut borders to make the edges curled upwards then you used your forceps to peal the drawing away, revealing layers of papers which were believed to be the documents that were hidden beneath it. 
“Hmmh.. hmmm~ yare yare, found ya’.” You whispered to yourself and smiled in relief, taking out the pieces of papers and gave it a read. 
The documents contained the Military Police reports of Nicholas Lovof’s crimes that included bribery, kidnapping, murders and any other atrocities that were enough to put someone under justified punishments. Not only that, the documents also included a detailed descriptions as well as names of the people that were in charge to kill Erwin Smith, a good colleague of yours, thanks to Nicholos’s manipulations. The said people were; a young red-haired girl styled in pigtails, another young man with a light-brown hair and persumably the oldest one of the pack,a sharp dull blue eyes man with a black hair styled in an uppercut. 
Then, you made a copy of the documents and kept them in a scroll so you could send them to Erwin, where the original copy of them were properly sealed in an envelope for you to send them to none other than Dhalis Zachary.
~🎨
You took a deep breath, inhaling the morning’s crisp while staring at the blue sky. It was always your favorite thing to do, starring at the sky, focusing on the colours that it held. From the wide ranges of blues, to the variety tones of the white from the clouds and sometimes the contrast colours of orange or pink that appears during dusk or dawn. 
After you had enough of your morning pill from the sky, you stepped out of your chamber and was greeted by your best friend, Hange with a raised of both your eyebrows. Both of you did not need much words to greet each other most of the times. You were best friends since your Training Corps years. Morning wasn’t the time for you guys to start acting real with each other. So, both of you walked by each other to the mess hall to get your breakfast then attended the assembly Scout Regiment’s concourse. 
During the morning assembly, you lined up beside Erwin as you were also a Section Commander and had your comrades under your unit to stand in a line behind you. As you were standing, you could see there were 3 people standing beside Commander Keith Sadis, and were introduced to the whole Scout Regiment as the new Scouts. One of them was a girl with red-brown hair tied into two pigtails, named Isabel Magnolia, the other was a man with dark blond hair named Furlan Church and the last one named Levi, a shorter man with black hair styled in an uppercut. All three of them were assigned into Flagon's unit much to his dismay. You glanced at Erwin by your side and he gave you a knowing look. While others found those new Scouts’ names foreign, both of you were exceptional and for a good reason. 
They were surprisingly good during their training, for some people who never had a formal training using the ODM gear, they performed fantastically well but they still needed some polishing for their Titans killing skills, except for Levi. You were always up to offer help to them but they often misunderstood since you usually looked cold and always a bit brutal during your trainings which were a famous fact among the Scout Regiment. Farlan and Isabel often thought that you hated them since they received resentments from severel other Scout cadets and thinking that you were also in the same boat as the other Scouts. Levi was always with his bored expression, you could barely read his expressions let alone his thoughts, unlike the other two. There was a time where Isabel blurted about why you insisted to help training them when you seemed to dislike them.
“It doesn’t matter if I like you guys or not, people train to kill the Titans and to survive. You guys seemed to rush things and hiding something, as if you wanted you to get done with killing Titans then move on to do something else that isn’t Titans related and I’m here trying to help you not to get killed by Titans”, you answered. There was a short silence followed after your answer. You could tell their breaths hitched for a moment but you remained stolid nevertheless.
“Well, we have to move on to do something else as in to focus on the formation right?”, Furlan replied with a hint of nervous. 
“Yeah, let’s hope so.” You answered. 
~🎨
In life, there were a lot of moments where the air would be tense and the night before expedition was one of them. The night was calm and quiet but you couldn’t ignore the heavy feeling in your heart. Tonight was just another night inside the wall but to some in the Scout Regiment, it would be their last. Tomorrow’s expedition would surely cost some of your comrades’ lives and might even yours, for the sake of humanity. 
You took a deep breath. But it still didn’t help to calm your nerves. You had been pacing in your room since dinner. You couldn’t stay still, palms were sweaty and heart was beating unsually fast tonight. Something bad was going to happen tomorrow. You could feel it in your guts. You recognized these telltale because whenever you felt like this, you’ll end up receiving death news be it your favorite neighbour from your hometown, your beloved pets or even the Scouts that you had helped in training. Deciding that sitting in your room wouldn’t help lessen the nerves, you grabbed your pencils and sketch papers then headed outside to gaze at the starry night sky to do some sketches in hope of easing your mind. 
As you arrived at you usual spot at tower of the Scout Regiment barracks, you slumped down and took a glance at the sky. The moon hadn’t shown itself yet, and there were thick clouds hanging everywhere. Then, you stared at your paper and pencil. Blank. No idea. No inspiration. Stuck. You sighed, and continued to stare at the night sky hoping to relax your mind for awhile. Then, you heard the sound of clicking boots which meant that there were people not far from you. It was Furlan and Isabel whom just arrived, they walked to a figure that you assumed to be Levi. You remained quiet and peeped them from your location. You could heard Isabel and Furlan trying to convince Levi about them joining tomorrow’s expedition. As you were eavesdropping not that you planned to in the first place, suddenly your hand started to sketch the paper, starting with the clouds and adding the diamonds in the sky, slowly without you realizing it, you were sketching the trio starring at the starry night sky under the moonlight that shone magnificiently. 
When you were done with the sketching, you returned to your room as quietly as possible and continued to add colours to your drawing before you got sleepy and finally free from your anxious feeling earlier. Before you headed to your bed, you jotted down the date behind your work which now known as painting, no longer just a sketch.
_
During the expedition, you and your squad were put around the right flank of the long range formation. There were few Titans appeared throughout the journey, none that your squad could handle. You were beyond grateful that all of your squad were still well and alive at the moment. Then, you received a signal to tighten the formation since the sky started to show sign that it would rain soon and a heavy one at that. You commanded your squad to pull on the hood of their capes and stayed as close as possible with you and each other so that no one would go unnoticed and it would be easier to assist if anything happen.
Despite the heavy downpour, your squad kept moving forward and you efficiently assisted your squad in killing any Titan that came in the way, it was always your promise to make sure everyone under you would return to the wall safe and alive. Then, suddenly you heard a weird noise coming from in front of you, not the usual strange noise that a Titan would make.A load, short but multiple groan as if a Titan was in pain. So, you rushed to the direction of the sound assuming that there might a cadet or a squad that needed your assistance. 
You arrived at the same time as Erwin’s and some other squad leaders, surrounded by an Abnormal Titan’s and plenty of your other comrades’ corpses. Then, you noticed Levi standing next to the Titan’s dead body with blood all over him and Isabel’s head in front of him with half of Furlan’s body not far from him as well. Levi seemed to be the only one survived from his squad. His head hanging slightly low, with his hair covering his eyes but the tears streaming down his cheeks didn’t go unnoticed by you. So, this explained the sweaty palm and racing heart you had another night- to see two cadets that you helped with training days ago, only now left with just just head and half of a body. You felt your shoulder fell and knees slightly shaking. You felt like your breath had been taken away.
As the rain started to stop slowly as the sunshine gently peeking from the clouds, you watched how Levi was about to kill Erwin which was stopped by Mike then Erwin explained about the Nicholos Lovof's situation causing Levi to stop his actions and stood silently, digesting the fact that he was caught up in Erwin’s plans. 
You did feel bad for Levi, Erwin wasn’t the only who knew about him and his friends’ true intention of joining the Scout Regiment. You knew about it too. It was your assignment to obtain the information about Nicholos Lofov’s crimes and sent it to Erwin as well as finding out the person who was assigned to supposedly kill Erwin. It was just a simple guess as to why those three didn’t refuse so much on joining he Scout Regiment when Erwin offered them to.
You were assigned with that task since you were not only a Section Commander but also a spy under the Scout Regiment as well as the cadets under your wings and some were also assets scattered across the town in disguise as an art dealer in Wall Sina, a commoner who opened a bakery shop or could be anyone in the town that simply invisible to the world but not to you. You needed to sniff around to obtain crucial informations that could contribute to the Scout Regiment strategies, formation and as well as humanity. 
~🎨
The barracks became quieter after the expedition ended which was normal due to the lost of lives. You were at your room that night, just checking your report before you could submit them to Erwin the next morning and decided to write some notes in your book. You opened your drawer and saw the painting that you made before the expedition took place. Levi, Isabel and Furlan staring at the sky. Two of the were smiling in admiration to the sky while Levi just being Levi, stoic as ever except his eyes where they were packed with ......hope. 
You suddenly felt drenched and decided to go for a glass of water at the kitchen before you headed to sleep. You inserted the sketching into your notebook and brought them with you to the kitchen, it just came across your mind to let Levi had it since you remembered how shattered he looked when he was kneeling in front of Isabel's head. The kitchen was empty when you arrived so you went to grab a cup and filled it with water.
As you took a sip of water from your glass, you saw Levi entering the same room as yours. Both of you were startled for a second yet no words left your mouths before he proceeded to make himself a tea and you with your drink. The room was filled with silence but not an uncomfortable one, at least for you. That was when it slipped your mind that you wanted to give the drawing to Levi. Only if he would accept your drawing. You thought he might wanted it since that drawing was an evidence of a sweet memory that his two friends left him during their short time in the Scout Regiment. Probably something for him to look at when he felt lonely. He was stirring his teaspoon with his back facing you when you called his name. Probably the first time having you calling his name. Probably the first time you would ever interact with him ever since he joined the regiment.
“.....um..Levi,” you called. That’s when your heart skipped a beat. And you felt a bit....just a bit nervous to see him reacting to you. Then, he turned around and faced you, intense dull blue eyes focusing on your eyes, expecting you to continue. You gulped. Man, was his gaze always this tense? You never noticed that before for sure.
“I was at the tower the night before the exhibition, with my sketching utensils because I needed to calm my nerves. Then suddenly you guys came and I made something. I didn’t plan doing it, I just went with the ideas flowing in my head,” you stopped and brought out your painting to his attention. He stayed focus listening to you and eyes never left your face before he took the drawing and examined it. You couldn’t say he was amused but his gaze did soften a little. 
“I’m sorry I draw the three of you without your permission.I know I should have asked your consent. And um, you could keep that...... If you want though,” you continued. You felt quite nervous not because you were scared of him, shy probably but not scared. You were nervous because one, you wished your drawing didn’t remind him of his late friends in a bad way and caused him more sadness, two, you didn’t want him to get mad at you for drawing him without his permission and three, um...what if your drawing looked like a toddler’s work? That would suck.
“It’s nice,” Levi finally spoke. His deep monotone voice comforted your ears. You breathed out a relief. 
“I want to keep it,” Levi said, hand still holding your drawing, eyes travelling back to yours with a softer gaze and as if asking for your permission. 
You nodded, “sure, make it yours, I do hope it’ll help you feel better, if that's even possible”, you replied with a soft chuckle as you slowly stood and got ready to head back to your room.
You saw Levi took a glance at the drawing then looked at you again before he replied you with, “thanks, I’ll treasure it.”
You flashed a small smile before yawning and took off to your room to get your sleep. Feeling light and at ease, knowing your drawing could help lift up someone’s mood.
Little did you know that, back in his chamber, Levi stared at your painting. He indulged himself into the painting that you made, every drop of colour as well as every line and traces left on the paper by you, realized how he missed watching his lost friends’ smiles and thanks to you, he could see his friends’ smiles once again eventhough it was just on a piece of a paper. Not to mention, he finally got to interact with you. You striked a mysterious aura when you first appeared before his eyes which intrigued him to get to know you, yet he never had a chance or a reason to talk to you but you were always there somewhere in the back of his mind. He was utterly grateful with the drawing you made, at least he could carve the smiles of his friends into his mind, their smiles might no longer exist in this world but it would always be in his heart and mind. 
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danihow · 4 years ago
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No answer
Soulmate AU
Bucky Barnes x Deaf!Reader
Marvel Cinematic Universe
Summary: In a world where everyone is born with their soulmates last words said to them before they die or leave is tattooed somewhere in your body, but your soulmate is unable to see them.
Warning: Angst, death, but fluff before all that.
Word count: 3k, yeah a bit long, sorry.
A/N: I felt like doing a deaf!reader in a soulmate au because why not. And this idea is not mine, i saw it somewhere and credit to them. And also, I kinda love having a deaf character.
Gif ain’t mine but THOSE EYES THO.
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Soulmates last words appear as a silver-inked mark on people’s bodies as a punishment from the angels to their actions, yet you didn’t care about them, you saw not actual point in having the last words of the love of your life tattooed, you didn’t understand what did humanity did to have such a bitter punishment as the words you’ll last hear from the person you will love the most just to know that they won’t be there anymore. People actually didn’t enjoy this soulmate thing a lot since they lived wondering if they are with their actual person and won’t find out until the day comes.
So, indeed you didn’t paid too much attention to these words on your collarbone who seemed pretty damn sad and made you want to not even meet them, you didn’t want them to hurt if the scenario of your or their departing was as tragic as the words wrote in silver were.
“Doll, you can’t leave me now, not now.”
You couldn't imagine a happy and calm scenario where those words can be said, no, they were sad, depressive and desperate words, yet you didn't knew if they were because you died too soon or you lived a long live with someone who wasn't ready to let you. Anyway, whoever says does words is hurting and you don't want them to hurt.
You lived your live worrying internally about it to the point that no one else knew about your words and you didn’t spoke about them if you were asked. Yet, your heart now belonged to a man who you deep inside prayed wasn’t the one your words came from, the man whose arm you repaired when you met and made what nobody else has done for you in order to make you happy, Bucky Barnes.
Bucky and you got to know each other in a special way, it happened when he entered the laboratory searching for the person that was going to change his arm after a rough mission. You were arranging the tools you were about to use to place someone’s metal arm as Tony indicated you to. The one-armed man greeted you with a “Good night” and felt a little bit disrespected when you didn’t even flinch to his words, he repeated in case he spoke too softly but yet received no answer.
He sat kind of mad in one of the stools of the lab, waiting for someone else to come and stayed in silence for a while at the same time you searched for something in a shelf, not being tall enough to reach it. “You need help?” He offered talking loud enough for you to be able to hear, but you didn’t. He pursed his lips while staying there, watching you trying to reach for whatever you needed, standing on a stool. 
He knew he did some things wrong in the past but you were disrespecting him quite a lot when you didn’t even greet back the simple good night he gave you. He stayed there again, waiting for someone to pay him attention.
Yet you kept there, in your world, not saying a word. After around ten minutes he stood there and you were still submerged in your own world. The impatience winning him over and in need of the repair he stood up the chair and walked to you.
“There’s actual no need to be rude to me, it’s kind of disrespectful.” He said firmly while approaching to where you stood, tapping your shoulder once and make you to flinch quite a lot.
You turned around scared and defensive, moving so quickly you tossed a couple of tools away the table. 
The petrified look on your eyes made him feel some kind of pressure in his chest, a guiltiness like no other for scaring the fuck out of you. “Oh shoot, sorry ma’am.” He said but you didn’t answered him again.
You did a sign with your hands, dragging your index finger from your ear to your mouth. By the confused look on his face you stretched to grab a notebook you always had near you and wrote something with a black pen.
“I’m sorry, I’m deaf.” He read in the note, feeling even guiltier if that was possible, he got so mad at you for ignoring him around five times and it wasn’t your fault, you weren’t able to hear him.
“You read lips?” He wrote back in the notebook once you handed it to him, receiving a nod from you. “I do.” You said in a soft almost inaudible voice.
“I’m here for the arm Stark talked about.” He says not as fast as he was used to so you didn’t struggle and then pointed at his arm.
You gave him a soft, warm smile and pointed to a chair so he could take a seat, grabbing the set of things you already had prepared. “I’m really sorry ma’am, I didn’t mean to scare you.” He said when you looked at him before starting, gaining a weak “Don’t worry” in response.
Your voice was really weak, yet soft and warm that his first instinct was to protect you, feeling crazy for thinking such a thing about a women he didn’t knew. You kind of explained to him through the notebook that you were going to replace his arm with a new one Shuri sent from Wakanda and if something hurt he must tell you immediately by rising his hand or something; while he read the message he couldn’t help but think about how beautiful your handwriting was and how much patience you had with him to write everything. He nodded in response and left the book aside.
You started by asking him to remove his shirt so you could remove the arm, yet you ended helping him when some strands of cloth got stuck in the open metal. You couldn’t help yourself by looking for a few seconds to the man’s shirtless torso before starting to remove his old broken arm. You let the arm aside, now starting to fix the wires and cutting open some others so you could connect the shoulder to the new sensorial adjustments Shuri created. You applied him some anesthesia on the shoulder skin and flesh that was still there so the adjustment to the neurons wouldn’t hurt him. 
The procedure went well until the readjustment part, he grabbed your hand with his flesh one when he felt a stung in his shoulder that hurt enough even with his really high pain tolerance. You stopped, looking worried at him as he closed his eyes shut, he hated being like this but shit, that hurt badly. After a while he nodded and let you continue with your worked.
He stared at you through the process, paying attention to the little details on your face so he could distract himself of you working and seeing his scars, he noticed the little wrinkles by your eyes when you smiled and noticed how calm you were and looked while working, without the terror he caused you a while ago.
You remember when you finished and connected the wire that made the arm functional, you remembered how he opened his eyes widely at the sensorial panels working, feeling your hands on his forearm. He looked at you in surprise and you chuckled a little under your breath.
You left the tools beside his old arm and watched his reaction, his metal arm moved, readjusting to the size of his shoulder and with his metal hand he reached to you but stopped, considering he could hurt you without knowing this arm’s strength so he instead reached for a tool near him, feeling the cold metal in his fingers and smiled. 
“When something hit you abruptly or penetrates the covering top of the panels they will shut down so you won’t feel the hurt.” You handed him the notebook.
“Thank you...” Then it hit him, he hadn’t presented himself to you or asked for you name, where did his manners went? Back in his times his mom would’ve smacked him in the face the second she knew. 
“Y/N” You said while doing the hand signs to it. Then he questioned himself about how to say to you his name, he reached out for the notebook again and wrote it so you could know it. 
“It’s a pleasure Bu... Bucky?” You said in a question, not knowing how to pronounce it. Then smiling widely at him when he nodded to you, you said it right.
“The pleasure’s mine.” He said and stood up after you did. “I’m still sorry for scaring you.” He said with shame on his voice. 
“No big deal, it happens usually.” You say in your soft weak voice and smile at him.
Now he had nothing to do there so you both walked to the entrance of the lab in slow pace in silence, when he got to the door he stood there. “How do you say goodnight?” He asks, wanting to properly greet you this time.
Your warm smile grows in your lips and you do slowly the hand sign, he copies you with concern and doubt in his expressions, smiling proudly when you say it back.
Then he was gone even if he wanted to stay longer, you light up a curious and interested side in him like no one else did before.
The days passed by with him coming periodically to see you for the reviewing of his new arm. Around the second Thursday of visiting you at your lab he greeted you in sign language, surprising you and making you feel extremely happy, he had seen you talk in ASL to your lab colleagues and felt bad for you having to write down everything for him or at least what you couldn’t speak.
He talked to Steve and Sam about you all the time to the point they knew more about you that they should. He talked about your facial expressions while talking in ASL, about how soft your voice was when you spoke, even about how now you knew he entered the lab with the new bracelet Tony made for you with its own AI named MAC (that stood for More Awesome Creations) which was connected to FRIDAY and buzzed in morse code when someone came in the lab.
After some more weeks the visits became biweekly yet he found a way to see you more often than that and you didn’t complain about it at all, you were really happy with having him around.
He got to know about you more and more every time he went, he learned your interests, your manners, your hobbies and even learnt about you past, he now knew that you became deaf twelve years ago at age of fifteen in an accident so you can still talk without hearing yourself. He started asking FRIDAY to show him some pages about learning ASL so you could talk freely with him and to surprise you.
In the matter of months, you two were like best friends, Tony hired you officially and permanently around four months before when you accomplished six months around here. Yet Bucky didn’t just felt things for you like he felt for Natasha or Wanda, his feelings were far away of what friends felt and each day they grew further to the point that Steve, Sam and even Tony and Nat were telling him to ask you out, but he was too afraid of rejection and to make your friendship go to waste that he kept his feelings for himself, befriending you.
On the other hand, you were like a part of the team by the year of being there and they all were pretty happy about your presence. They all had their very own way of friending you, Sam struggled a little bit with learning sign language so he uses quite a lot the little pocket notebook you gifted him so he can talk to you, Tony gifted you for your birthday an intelligent watch that writes in its screen what people are saying to you in case you don’t read the lips fast enough so you can use it in reunions.
Natasha and Clint didn’t struggle at all with learning the language and Steve was actually really agile at learning it too, surprising you a lot. Wanda struggled a bit more so she had another little notebook and pen in her pocket like Samuel, the Queens kid, Peter, was pretty fast at learning it to the point he easily became like your little brother since he spent most of the time at the lab upgrading his suit and his talkative-self forced himself to learn ASL so he can keep telling you about his day at school every day.
And so it went with everyone else, they adapting to you or you adapting to them, whatever came first.
Then, today was the day Fury finally decided to send you in a mission with the team since they were extracting some new tech and you were crucial to take care of it and evaluate it.
Obviously, you were left at the jet with Bruce, who even had some tea onboard to calm the nerves the mission gave him before his time to shine green came.
Bucky was actually really worried for you throughout the mission, thinking about finishing this as fast as possible so all of you can go back to the compound and to have you out of risk, save in his arms. 
When the objective was achieved the super soldier was heading back to the jet with Wanda by his side. He smiled at the thought of being back at the compound, laying in the sofa watching a movie while you were reading and playing with his hair, as always.
But that wasn’t in the plans of destiny.
You smiled at both of them warmly and welcomed them, you hugged Wanda, who was the first one on board but when you were about to hug the super soldier his enhanced hearing sensed something, a click and some branches moving and before he could turn around someone shoot you, letting you stand there as a big red stain formed on your chest, right were you heart is, and another two stains formed on your stomach. 
Both of them froze for a moment, looking at you as if it wasn’t real, then he finally turned around, spotting the sniper behind a bunch of trees, shooting at him with his weapon. 
Bucky raced to reach you before you fell, grabbing you between his arms and leaning you down to the floor slowly as his eyes started to water. 
“Doll, hey Y/N, look at me.” He said knowing you couldn’t hear him, his eyes terrified at the idea of losing you. “Doll, look at me, please.” He begged, his voice cracking as his hands were now stained with your blood. 
You looked at him, staring right into his blue watery eyes, giving him a little warm smile just as the one you gave him when you first met. “Hey, I’m here.” You whispered with your soft and even weaker voice, rising your hand to spoon his cheek, rubbing your thumb in there to comfort him.
Wanda was shocked, standing by his side, she got down to her knees, putting her hand on Bucky’s shoulder as he held you in his arms, watching a scene no one will ever want to watched.
Then Steve and Tony came over, their joyful expressions breaking at the sight that welcomed them at the jet.
“Don’t leave me Y/N.” Bucky said desperately, you read his lips and tried to smile. “You can’t.” Shit. No, no, no, no, you didn’t like where this was going, no, shit no, it can’t be him, you’d prayed each night and day for him to not be the one so he wouldn’t hurt add he was doing now.
“Bucky, I love you, okay?” You whispered even weaker against the growing pain in your heart, rubbing the tears away of your man’s face. “I love you, remember that.”
It felt like a knife was stabbed in Bucky’s heart when those words came to his mind, no, you said the words that were tattooed on his ribs since almost a century ago, he couldn’t lose you now. “Doll, you can’t leave me now, not now.” He said with the pain in his chest increasing, his tears falling down his cheeks as your eyes were fixed in his. 
You were his soulmate and you were just about to die, there was nothing to do, if there was the words wouldn’t be there.
Your chest hurt but not because of the bullet, not anymore, it hurt because of his words, you were soulmates but you were too afraid of ruining everything that didn’t even got to be together. The look in his eyes, his face, he knew it too but even if you tried to speak, no words came out. Both of you were crying, you wanted to kiss him to at least know how it would’ve felt but you couldn’t move too much anymore, you were giving your last breaths.
Bucky thought about it too, leaning until your nose touched his, giving you a delicate and sad first and last kiss. Then he couldn’t hear your heartbeat anymore, he separated a few inches to see you, lifeless with your eyes peacefully closed. “No, doll.” He muttered, not even caring about his colleagues seeing him. “Y/N...” He held your fragile and dead body against his, crying his heart out in your hair. After a little while Steve approached to his friend, putting his hand on his other shoulder. 
“Buck, we need to go, more are coming.” He whispered carefully, as if the simplest words could shatter his friend in pieces.
“She was her all along, Steve, and I lost her.” He cried without letting you go and those words were like a bucket of cold water for the rest, Tony and Wanda crying you silently as Steve stepped back to give him the time he needed.
Their friend had just lost the love of his life.
You.
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itskateak · 4 years ago
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Mint Ice Cream & Bubblegum Kisses - Chapter Three
(Bucky Barnes x Single Dad!Reader)
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Series Summary: Y/N L/N works as an intel specialist at the Avenger’s Compound. He scans chatter on the international - and intergalactic - level for any information that might be helpful to the Avengers and other agents. But he’s also a single father to a beautiful eight-year-old girl: Angelica L/N. It’s tough raising a little girl on his own and working a full-time job, but he’s managing. A promotion has him launched up in rank at the Compound, leading him to work directly with the Avengers team. The only problem is it’s a 24/7 job. Life around the compound gets a little strange when his daughter is added to the mix of enhanced humans and ex-assassins.
Chapter Summary: Angelica seems to be settling in nicely and Y/N is still getting used to having his kid around in his workplace. Especially when she's known to be a little mischievous.
Word Count: 2.6
Warnings: Fluff, pranks, like four swear words, discussion of PTSD but it's very brief. Like very brief.
A/N: this is in light of me recently being able to play Black Widow for work. as I said in the last chapter, things will be moving a lot quicker
Masterlist
Taglist is open! PM me, send an ask, or @ me on a chapter to let me know you’d like to be tagged! Strikethrough means I couldn’t tag you, but I will send you a message to let you know :)
✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ ... ✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ ... ✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ 
Angelica snuck down the hall toward the common room, trying to keep her steps light or as close to silent as she could get them. She resisted the urge to look up at the ceiling, knowing Peter was just above her. This was a new system they were trying out where Angelica went first as a decoy and Peter would follow for the proper scare.
They had a shared love of harmless pranks and therefore had started a small prank war on the other inhabitants of the compound. At first, it had only been against each other, but they figured out that they could do way more if they teamed up. 
Y/N had warned them not to do anything too bad, knowing how some of the people in the compound were affected by sudden surprises. He'd sat Angelica down and explained what Post Traumatic Stress Disorder was and how what she might perceive as a harmless trick might trigger something or cause a breakdown. 
She had understood and in her very solemn way promised to run her more "fear factor" ideas by him first just to be safe. When he did shut down her ideas, she never argued and dropped the plan. Confuse not abuse was their motto.
Y/N, meanwhile,  was working in his office, watching text scroll across his screen. There was a lot less than when he worked general intel, but that didn't mean he could focus any less. Any small detail could make or break whether the information was crucial or not. Everything that came across his screen was very important, but some things had to be taken note of.
He had mastered reading and writing at the same time, his shorthand notes making no sense to anyone but him. He'd learned that the week before when he passed the intel off to Tony and he just stared blankly at the paper. Now, he translated his notes so others could understand. Sometimes, he couldn't tell what he was meaning to say.
A transmission from The Benatar came through and he pulled his seat closer. It was just a simple message about their whereabouts and where they were headed. Gamora had signed it off, saying that it was nice to meet him and that whenever they stopped by next, they had to properly meet. He wrote down their message before typing a message in response.
Received. Glad to know you all are safe and having fun up there. Stop by anytime you want. My daughter would be overjoyed to meet all of you. 
 - Y/N 
Y/N leaned back in his chair, taking up a pen to make notes as information on underground movements possibly related to Hydra agents flooded in. More bases had been popping up recently, despite Steve's attempts to drag them all down in the past. Instead of being against the Winter Soldier, though, he was with them. Which gave them the upper hand since he knew their inner workings.
A knock on his office door made him glance up. Bruce stood in the doorframe, his knuckles still against the wood of the door. He gave a shy smile. "Am I interrupting?"
"Not at all. Come on in, Bruce." Y/N set his pen down and rolled his chair to the end of his desk. "What can I do you for?"
"I just came by to see how you were settling in. We haven't talked much since you were offered the promotion." Bruce sat tentatively on the couch, looking very unsure of himself. 
"Things have been going well. It's nice of you to stop by, though." Y/N swiveled back and forth casually. "I like having my own office."
"It's great, huh? I have a whole lab to myself most of the time. Tony invades my space once in a blue moon but he has his own lab somewhere else." Bruce relaxed a little, laughing gently. 
"Angelica breaks the peace at least twice a day, but she's my kid so it's not as annoying. Except when I really have to focus. Then I kick her out for a bit." He said with a lopsided grin.
"She wanders into my lab every so often to say hello or ask for help with her science homework. She's lovely." Bruce smiled. "Very bright."
"Yeah, she is...I can't keep up with her at this point. She's going to surpass my skills soon." He chuckled, shaking his head. "Good thing she's got you guys to check her science. I barely passed it in high school."
"Really? I wouldn't have expected that from you." Bruce said.
"I was okay up through my sophomore year but once I hit physics, I lost all understanding. Algebra was never my strong suit, either." Y/N rolled his eyes. Bruce was going to respond when shouting down the hall caught their attention. 
Peter sprinted by the office, yelling over his shoulder: "Every man for himself!"
Angelica was a few seconds behind him and she slid into her father's office. "Hide me! Quick!" She slipped around his desk and curled up underneath it.
"Kiddo, what are you doing?" Y/N asked, giving her an amused look.
"Shhhh!" She shushed him and pressed herself into the corner, covering her mouth to hide her giggles. 
"Peter Benjamin Parker! Angelica Ellaine L/N! Get your butts back here!" Natasha seemed to be the source of the yelling as she stormed down the hall. She paused at the door to the office, leaning casually in the doorframe. "Hey, boys. You seen a tall spider or a little monster recently?"
Angelica shook her head vigorously in her father's peripheral vision. He pretended not to see her, making sure not to look anywhere close to her location. "Snitches don't get cookies." She whispered as quietly as possible.
"What'd she do now?" Y/N asked. He had to uphold the Code. Snitches don't get cookies, and he'd never betray his daughter.
"She tried to jumpscare me and then Peter swung down from the ceiling and scared the hell out of me." Nat folded her arms over her chest. "So, I'm trying to grab both of them to dump them in the pool."
Y/N laughed and shook his head. "I haven't seen her, except for a few seconds ago. She ran by on Pete's heels."
"Bruce, have you seen them?" Nat turned her gaze to the scientist, who suddenly grew visibly nervous. 
"Uh," He glanced at Y/N. "They ran by just a minute ago."
"Uh-huh...Well, I guess I'll just keep looking." Nat pushed off the doorway and started to leave before poking her head back in. "You're still a terrible liar, Bruce." She winked and disappeared.
"Is it safe?" Angelica whispered.
"Yep. Come on out." Y/N rolled back a little bit to give her space to move out. "Good luck out there, kiddo. Watch your back."
"Thank you, Mr. Banner! You deserve a cookie." Angelica smiled at Bruce, the full personification of the smiley-face emoticon. She snuck to the doorway and glanced down the hall before turning the same way Peter had run.
"How long do you think it'll be?" Y/N asked, returning his chair to its proper place.
"Until what?" 
His question was answered by a scream from down the hall that devolved into squealing laughter. There was some indiscernible shouting from three different people.
"Until Nat caught her at the corner." Y/N watched as Nat went running by, laughing, with Angelica thrown over her shoulder.
"Peter! Help! She got me!" Angelica yelled through giggles, hand extended out behind Nat's back.
"Angelica! No!" Peter followed, reaching for her. "Nat, give her back!"
Y/N shook his head fondly as the chaos grew quieter the farther they got. "We're settling in well, as you can see. She's making friends and creating chaos. I'd be worried if she wasn't."
"Did she always play pranks on you?" Bruce asked, smiling uncontrollably.
"On more than one occasion, I found shaving cream in my shoes." Y/N wrinkled his nose up at the memories. He had hated that feeling of shaving cream squeezing between his toes in his socks.
"Gross. She and Peter were bound to get along well, then." Bruce glanced at the clock and got to his feet. "I should let you get back to work. If Angelica has a science or math question, you can totally send her to me."
"Thanks, Bruce. You're a genius." Y/N rolled back over to his work station, shaking his mouse to wake his computer up. 
"I wouldn't say that," Bruce said as he walked backward out of the room, pausing in the doorway.
"Don't sell yourself short, Bruce! You're totally a genius." Y/N pointed with his pen, smiling as he spoke.
Bruce ducked his head sheepishly and nodded before he left the office.
Y/N returned to his screen, pulling his notes back into reach, and scanned the text again. Another couple of hours before lunch.
✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ ... ✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ ... ✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ 
"Your kid." Tony suddenly popped in, holding his phone out to show Y/N what was on it. "Your kid keeps changing my phone background."
Y/N looked up and glanced at the screen before bursting into laughter. It was a photo of a sloth dressed as an astronaut. In the past year, she'd managed to change her father's phone background and laptop wallpaper to that stupid sloth photo without his knowledge at least sixteen times. 
"Why?" Tony asked, defeated. "Why is she doing this?"
"She read about someone online who did the same thing to their parents and she took inspiration. I'm happy to see she's moved on to other targets." Y/N shook his head in amusement. "Shouldn't your phone be super secure or something?"
"It is! I don't understand how she keeps doing it. I've changed my password eight times and even had Friday monitor any attempts to hack in." Tony sank down onto the couch, tossing his phone beside him. 
"Well, she definitely can't hack things. She's smart, but not that smart. Usually, a password change will keep her from trying again." Y/N swiveled to the side, head cocked.
"This is the second time today," Tony grumbled, brows furrowed. "I don't get it."
"Well, you're the genius here." Y/N snorted, glancing at his screen again. "If my kid's not the one hacking your phone, who is?"
"Oh, my god," Tony said, standing quickly. He rushed to leave but paused in the door. "You're the genius, Y/N."
Y/N arched a brow in mild intrigue. "Uh-huh. You're welcome?"
Tony flashed a smile before turning. "Peter Benjamin Parker, how many times have I told you not to hack into my stuff!" He shouted as he walked down the hall.
"Kid, you're sowing chaos." Y/N glanced at his daughter curled up under his desk. 
"Huh?" Angelica looked up from her book, confused. "What's going on?"
"Peter hacked Tony's phone and changed his phone background to that astronaut sloth." He responded, returning to his work.
"Oh, Pete didn't do that." She said, turning her page. "Mr. Banner did after seeing us do it. Somethin' about getting back at him for leaving crumbs all over his lab."
Distant yelling floated down the hall to the office. High-pitched 'Mr. Stark, it wasn't me!'s were the only things that could be properly made out. Angelica made eye-contact with her father.
"Should I?" She asked.
"Nah." Y/N said and they both started to snicker. "He's a big boy. He can take care of himself."
Angelica giggled and returned her attention to her book. 
✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ ... ✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ ... ✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ 
Y/N pulled himself out of the pool, shaking his head to fling water off his face. He hadn't gotten to use the facilities yet since they moved in. The pool was really nice - way better than any of the public pools he'd been to. He used to swim once a week but work got in the way. Now that it was Sunday, he could enjoy the free access for as long as he wanted.
He grabbed a towel, dried his hair and face, and walked to the locker room. His shirt was folded up on a bench with his shoes sitting beside it. He dried the rest of his body off and pulled his shirt on. He slipped his feet into his shoes and froze.
"Dammit, Angelica!" Y/N shouted as shaving cream seeped between his toes and spilled over the top of his feet. He grimaced and kicked his shoes off, quickly wiping the shaving cream off. He picked up his shoes and went storming off to find his daughter.
✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ ... ✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ ... ✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ 
"Hey, Y/N. Sorry to intrude after hours." Sam knocked on the doorframe to his bedroom. 
"Hey, Sam. No worries." Y/N looked up from his book and set it aside. "What's up?"
"Bucky and Steve are coming back really early tomorrow morning. Like, three in the morning early." He wrinkled his nose up. "They might have sensitive intel from their raid so Tony's asked you to be in office by the time they get back."
"I won't yell at you since you're just the messenger, but really?!" Y/N groaned, running a hand over his face. If he wasn't a morning person before, he surely wouldn't be a happy camper at such an early hour. "Guess my plans to stay up reading have been shot."
"Sorry, man. It's what the boss wants. But really, blame Barnes because he wanted to get back as soon as possible." Sam crossed his arms and shrugged. "Always his fault if somethin' goes wrong. Man brings bad luck wherever he goes."
"I think that's a little harsh and biased. I haven't even met the guy, yet." Y/N leaned over to set his book on the nightstand. He snagged his phone and started to set an alarm or two for the morning. 
"I'm sure you've heard all the rumors. Some of them are true - about him being grouchy and an anti-social person - but a good majority of the rumors is just scuttlebutt. Er, gossip. He's got a good heart, but man he can be annoying as hell," Sam smiled fondly, though he tried not to look it. 
"Sounds about right," Y/N chuckled, sliding his charging phone underneath his pillow. 
"He's really slow to trust and open up, so if he's a little closed off and rough around the edges, it's not you. It's all him, so don't worry." Sam explained. "Might want to ease him into meeting the little rascal, though. He's skittish on his bad days and after missions."
"I took the liberty of reading over all of the team's files so I get why. Thanks for letting me know. I should get some sleep so I'm not as grumpy in the morning when I greet them." Y/N yawned on accident, covering his mouth with his hand. 
"No problem. I'll let you get some rest." Sam reached forward and closed the door as he left.
Y/N turned out the light and sank down in bed, drawing the covers up. He had at least four extra blankets just for the weight. He liked having the excess weight since it made him feel secure and grounded. 
"Hey, Friday?"
"Yes, Mr. L/N?"
"If I don't wake up from my alarms, please wake me." 
"Of course." 
Y/N fell asleep shortly afterward, not fully aware of how tired he had been. Moving and getting used to the new environment had really taken it out of him and his body was begging to catch up. A shame he'd only get five hours before being dragged from bed. That was going to be one of the very few downsides of this new job.
✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ ... ✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ ... ✿°•∘ɷ∘•°✿ 
Taglist- @supernaturalwintersoldier​ @shadowolf993​ @myybebe
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vortahoney · 4 years ago
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There’s a Lot of Math in Engineering
A piece I wrote for my art trade with @bensiskos
Hope you enjoy!
The last thing that the engineer of the U.S.S. Barry had expected was for a Ferengi child to become attached to him. When the ship stopped at a trading outpost, the little guy— he said his name was Breba— had snuck himself onto it, completely bypassing security. He only managed to go undetected for a while. He was later discovered holed up behind some equipment in Engineering. 
And then was promptly put into Dave’s care.
It was no secret that Dave liked children, he got baby fever every now and then, and he did hope to be a father someday, but he wasn’t exactly enthused about the impromptu adoption. He didn’t even know this child! How is he meant to care for them?
Though, he couldn’t say he was insulted that he was his coworkers’ first choice for “immediate parent”. And he couldn’t say that keeping Breba safe didn’t warm something in him.
Breba was always ready to learn, even if he was obviously nervous. For instance, he seemed to be scared of people, but he listened so well in the U.S.S. Barry’s small, three-person school. He and Dave even got into a little routine, now that he was his roommate. 
Usually, Dave would replicate breakfast and then take Breba to the little schoolroom on the lower deck, except on weekends, when he’d cook breakfast and watch old holo-movies with him. In the afternoons, once Breba was done with school and they’d eaten dinner, Dave would read him a story and put him into bed. Every day he felt more and more like the Ferengi’s father.
“Dave?” Breba looked at him from his small bed, nest-like bed in the corner.
“Hm?”
“I think I want to do engineering.”
Dave looked up from his PADD and crooked an eyebrow. “Well, that’s good, that you’re taking an interest in something! What makes you want to engineer?”
“Mr. Dean says I’m good at math.” He paused. “And I like all the machines on the ship.”
“The ones you named?”
Breba nodded and paused a moment. “And you do it.”
“Yeah, I do.” Dave smiled, biting the inside of his cheek. “I could show you around engineering, if you want.”
Eyes brightening, Breba perked up and nodded.
“But in the morning. You need to go to bed first.”
“But—” 
“No buts! Sleep.”
Breba grumbled, but he did turn over and fall asleep. Dave couldn’t help but look for a while, smiling, before he turned his PADD off and went to bed himself.
***
Dave was woken up at 0500 by a smiling, wide-eyed Ferengi. 
“Mornin’, buddy…” His voice was rough and groggy. “What are you doing up?”
“We were gonna go to engineering today!”
Yawning, Dave propped himself up. “Work doesn’t start for four hours.”
“Can’t we go early?”
“Alright, alright.” He stretched and pushed his hair out of his face. “I’ll clock in early and show you around. If I had known you were so interested, I would have brought you to work with me earlier.”
“Yes!” Breba leaped off of Dave’s bed and scurried to get dressed.
Smirking and shaking his head, Dave punched a few codes into the replicator: a bowl of toasted tubeworms for Breba and a bowl of oatmeal for him. Breba was practically buzzing with excitement, wolfing down his food and unable to sit fully still in his chair.
“Hey, hey. Slow down, buddy, or you’ll choke. Engineering isn’t going anywhere.”
“Sorry!” Breba finally took a pause and wiped his mouth with his napkin. 
“So what do you want to see first?”
“The warp core!” He answered almost immediately.
“Alright, the warp core it is.”
As soon as everything was ready, Breba dragged Dave by his wrist down to engineering. Dave didn’t hesitate to show him where everything was (in case he got lost), but Breba was too excited by all the machines, stopping to point out every beep or blinking light, to pay full attention.
“And this is the warp core.” Dave stopped right in front of it, watching Breba’s excitement grow when his eyes caught the soft blue glow. “Do you know what it does?”
“It’s like the engine. It makes the ship go into warp speed.”
Dave nodded. “That’s true, but it also powers the whole ship. Life support, lights, everything.”
“How does it do that?”
“Well,” He paused, trying to find the simplest explanation. “It takes matter, and antimatter, and puts it through a fusion reaction. That reaction makes the power that the ship needs, but it could also destroy the ship. The dilithium crystals inside the core are what makes sure the fusion reaction doesn’t get too big.”
Breba nodded, eyes still fixated on the core and its blue light. 
Dave cleared his throat. “My job is to fix anything that goes wrong here, or really anywhere else. If you want, you could go to Starfleet Academy and be an engineer too.”
“When can I go to Starfleet Academy?” His wide eyes finally broke from the warp core and turned to Dave. 
“After you’re done with high school. Then you have to take a test, and if you pass, you can study in the engineering department for four to six years and get your degree.”
“That’s a lot of school…”
“Well, I think it was worth it. And you like school, don’t you?”
Breba nodded, perking up. “I do! I like math!”
“Good news,” Dave crouched down to his level. “There’s a lot of math in engineering.”
Breba laughed and nodded. “I know.”
“Now let’s go take a look at my tools, you’ll need to know what they do.”
*** 
Rumblings coming from the warp core weren’t exactly something that one could ignore, especially when they were growing more intense and frequent by the hour. Dave had been working for hours trying to find the source of the problem, but it was to no avail. Until, of course, it dawned on him that one of the dilithium crystals had broken.
Unfortunately, this realization came to him at the worst possible movement. One rumble, particularly intense, had caused the entrance to the warp core to collapse in on itself, leaving only one miniscule opening that no regular-sized person could crawl through.
Red lights were the only illumination in engineering, and the speakers blasted a countdown to complete loss of life support. Ten minutes. Dave’s stomach turned with anxiety as he pored over the ship’s blueprints. The inside of his cheek was chewed raw, and he was starting to taste blood. There wasn’t any solution that he could see, at least, none that wouldn’t involve setting off explosives in the middle of the ship and risking a warp core explosion. A nervous growl rose in his throat as it became more and more likely they were all going to die.
Just as he lost all hope, he felt a tug at his sleeve. 
Breba was looking up at him with wide, shaming eyes. “Dave?” 
“What are you doing here??” Dave squeaked.
“I… well, I… I got scared.”
Biting his lip and taking a deep, calming breath, Dave looked down. “It’s really, really dangerous here right now. How did you even get out here? I thought you were in school!”
“The door caved in but there was a hole.”
“And you… got through…” A lightbulb went off in Dave’s brain. “Breba, do you remember anything about the warp core?”
“I- I…” he thought for a second and nodded.
Dave crouched down and handed him a beeping instrument. “I think I might have a job for you. I need you to fix the dilithium crystals. You think you can do that, buddy?” 
“But I don’t know how!” Panic flooded Breba’s face.
“I’ll walk you through it.” Dave pinned a communicator to his shirt. “Don’t worry, you’ll do great.”
Walking Breba through the process of re-aligning the dilithium crystals wasn’t as difficult as either of them expected. He crawled through the opening easily and, with Dave’s instruction, the process was done in under five minutes. The real hard part was getting his poor hands to stop shaking. 
“Hey, hey…” Dave’s voice was soft. “You did great! You saved the ship!”
Breba nodded, the trembling refusing to subside, and spoke up in a voice that was barely a whisper. “I was worried that I’d mess up and that everyone would…”
“You didn’t, okay? You didn’t mess up. You did so great, but I’ll make sure that you never have to do that kind of thing again.”
Breba nodded and bit the inside of his cheek. Just as he did, he whimpered and started crying. Dave’s eyes widened, and he pulled Breba into a hug.
“Are you okay?” He said after a while. 
“Yeah…”
Dave smiled and stood just in time to greet the Captain as she entered engineering. “Captain!”
Captain T’Athy took a breath and looked him in the eye. “I trust you got the issue with the warp core resolved?”
He nodded, placing a hand on Breba’s shoulder. “The crystals were unaligned. This little guy was the only one who was able to get through the rubble and fix them.”
Blushing, Breba lifted his hand and gave a small wave.
“Good work, Ferengi.” The captain offered her hand.
Breba took it, blushing even deeper. The captain gave a swift nod and left to go man the bridge.
“Good work? Wow, I think she’s warming up to you.” Dave gave him a pat on the back.
“Dave?”
“Hm?”
“Do you think I’d be a good engineer?”
“Of course I do, buddy!” Dave smiled gently. “You fixed the warp core, didn’t you? Now, let’s go get you some ice cream, you’ve had quite the day.”
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densi-mber · 4 years ago
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Crush
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A/N: This takes places in the semi-near future. For today’s prompt: Kensi or Deeks as a teacher. This fic represents what happens when my mind runs wild with an idea.
***
“Hey, can I call you back in about an hour and a half?” Deeks asked as he jogged down a flight of stairs to the third floor. “I have office hours starting in a few minutes.”
“Sure. Good luck with the gremlins,” Kensi answered. He rolled his eyes, nodding to a passing professor.
“Kens, they’re in they’re 20’s. You have to stop calling my students things like gremlins and children.”
He walked into the small office where he spent his time when he wasn’t teaching Contract Law to thirty or so L1 students. He dropped his bag by the desk, and slipped his jacket off, rolling his sleeves up a few times so he wouldn’t end up getting ink or chalk on the fabric. His dry cleaning bills had definitely increased since he started wearing dress shirts and ties again.
A little less than a year before, when he’d be aimlessly looking for a job, one of his former classmates had suggested teaching until he found something more permanent. Deeks had balked at the idea initially, but eventually given when it became clear that he needed to work and his other options were unavailable.
He’d never anticipated how much he would enjoy it. Now he taught three classes throughout the week at Loyola Law school as an adjunct professor. It was strangely satisfying to have a hand in teaching the next batch of lawyers.
“All I’m saying is that they look a lot younger that I did at that age.” Deeks snorted at Kensi’s completely inaccurate observation as he wrote a few notes on the blackboard that took up most of the back wall.
“You were just a baby when I met you,” he teased.
“Yet you still married me,” Kensi pointed out.
“Ooh, touché.” He heard a noise behind him and glanced over his shoulder. “Oops, gotta go. See you at dinner.” Deeks hung up, turning around completely to face one of his students, Mallory Baten.
She was lingering in the doorway and if Deeks didn’t know better, he would have thought she was hesitating. But that didn’t align with the young woman he knew. Mallory was one of the most outspoken and confident students in the class. She also had a biting sense of humor that Deeks found hilarious.
“Hey Mallory, what can I do for you?” he asked, gesturing for her to take a seat. Again she hesitated a little before pulling up one of the metal chairs situated opposite his desk.
“I had a few questions about Monday’s lecture, Mr. Deeks,” she said, pulling out a thick, color coded binder. The sight of it always reminded him of his own college experience and made him slightly nauseous. He did not miss the stress of studying and exams.
Deeks dragged his chair over with his foot and sat down with his forearms braced against the back, waiting for her to continue.
Brushing her light blond hair back from her neck, Mallory flipped to a page from the last class notes. Deeks instantly recognized her small, neat handwriting covering the majority of the paper.
“So, I was rereading the section on unjust enrichment and I wondered if you could clarify the concept. The text book had some examples, but I thought it was a little lacking,” she said, pointing to her notes.
Deeks tilted his head, quickly scanned her notes and nodded. It was a fairly simple concept, but Mallory tended to be exceedingly thorough. She was one of five or six students who regularly attended his office hours.
“Ok, so unjust enrichment essentially says that if I provide you with a service or product, I deserve compensation. Even if you end a contract early or have an issue with how I provided the service, you still need to provide compensation for those services or produces you received,” he explained.
“Even if the services or products weren’t satisfactory?” she asked, writing something in the corner of the page.
“Well, that would fall under a different part of contract law and would be considered a breach of contract. Assuming there was a legitimate contract to begin with. Does that answer your question?”
“Yes, it does, Mr. Deeks.”
“Awesome, I’ll see you on Wednesday,” Deeks said, grabbing a stack of homework assignments that needed grading from the end of his desk while Mallory packed up her binder.
“Actually, I have one more question,” Mallory said. He glanced up, mildly surprised to find her standing over her desk. “Do you want to have dinner with me tonight?”
Deeks froze, sure he’d heard her wrong.
“Do I-what are you asking me?”
“I’m asking you to go out to dinner. On a date.” Her cheeks were a little flushed, but her gaze didn’t waver.
“You know, I’m married, right?” he asked a little desperately. He saw Mallory’s eyes flick to his ring and then back to his face, and she nodded.
“I know.”
“And I’m your teacher.”
“You’re also really hot,” she said bluntly and he felt his cheeks fill with heat. “Plus you’re funny, caring, and my god, your muscles are incredible. Sometimes I come to office hours just to watch the you move.”
Mallory seemed past the point of embarrassment, but he wished a hole would open up in the floor. Or he could throw himself out a window. Unfortunately, his office didn’t have one so he’d have to actually face this. It didn’t help that Mallory was now openly checking him out.
Suppressing a groan, he turned in a half circle, pinching the bridge of his nose as tried to figure out what to say. The continuing ed classes he’d taken hadn’t prepared him for this possibility at all.
“Mart-Mr. Deeks, are you ok?” He almost laughed at the question.
He turned back around to face Mallory again, balancing a on hand on his hip. She looked a little more uncertain again and was watching him avidly.
“Well, this is, uh, wow.” He cleared his throat noisily and tried again. “While this is incredibly, um, flattering, I think we both know that nothing is going to happen between us. For a multitude of reasons,” he said as gently as he could.
“We could still just go out for dinner,” she suggested hopefully. “As friends.”
“No, we can’t,” Deeks said firmly. “Now we should go talk to the dean about getting you transferred to another class section for the remainder of the semester.”
***
“Hey baby,” Kensi greeted him at home later that day, punctuating it with a kiss. “How was work?”
“An unmitigated disaster,” he sighed. He dropped his bag by the door, and flopped onto the couch. Kensi sat next to him and grabbed his hand with a look of concern.
“What happened? Everything seemed fine when I talked to you earlier today.” Deeks groaned, silently reliving the last few hours.
“One of my students hit on me today.” If he’d expected Kensi to react with outrage, he was about to be disappointed. She visibly relaxed beside him, smacking his arm with the back of her hand.
“Why didn’t you lead with that? You had me really worried,” she said, shaking her head at his apparent lack of consideration.
“The fact that a 23 year old asked me out to dinner doesn’t bother you at all?” Deeks asked. Kensi shrugged.
“I figured it was only a matter of time.” Deeks gave her a look and she rolled her eyes at him. “For someone who claims to be a reformed lady’s man, you are ridiculously oblivious when someone is flirting with you. Half the women in your class have a crush on you.”
���No they don’t.” Kensi actually laughed at his protest, patting his arm with false sympathy.
“Uh, yeah they do, babe. Every time I’ve visited you at work, there are no less than three students staring at you at any time. Sometimes even a couple teachers,” she said, clearly enjoying this more than she had any right to.
“Ugh, now I’m going to be thinking about these kids checking me out during class,” he groaned. “This sucks.”
“You’re not even a little bit flattered?” she asked with mild surprised. He shrugged. Maybe he would have been at one time, but now it just seemed weird and a little creepy.
“I might be if I wasn’t old enough to be their father.” Kensi squinted at him and he clarified, “If I had them really young.”
“I’m sure they don’t think of you in a fatherly way.” Deeks made a face at that and gave a full-body shudder.
“Well, thanks for that horrible thought,” he said dryly. “And here I just thought they all loved my teaching.”
“Well, I’m sure they appreciate that too.” Kensi smirked at him as he pouted, running her fingers through his hair. “It’s all your own fault, you know.”
“How is this my fault? I didn’t ask for any of this.”
“You can’t walk around all day in tight shirts and pants with your sleeves rolled up and not expect to get noticed,” she said, leaning in and gliding her nose across his jaw. She inhaled deeply. “You look good enough to eat.” As she spoke, her hand drifted up his bare forearm to cup his bicep. It was a fairly innocent touch, but he still felt a shiver work its way up his spine.
“Is that an offer?” he asked, thoughts of Mallory quickly leaving his mind. Kensi walked her fingers up his arm and across his chest, pausing at his collar. She fiddled with the button on his collar and then slowly tugged his tie free.
“It’s a promise,” she said, the husky note in her voice incredibly sexy. Deeks settled his hands on her hips as she rose up on her knees and straddled his thighs. Smiling down at him, she brushed her hair back, the glossy strands dancing around her shoulder, and slipped the top button free on his shirt. Then she looked up, her expression playful, and added, “For later.”
“That’s cruel,” he complained. “Especially when I’ve had such a terrible day. It was mortifying.”
“So how much did you freak out when she asked you out?” she asked slyly.
“I handled it with all the finesse and professionalism that you would expect from a former criminal defendant, detective, and federal liaison,” Deeks said with mock solemnity and Kensi raised an eyebrow at him.
“Really?” Her voice was filled with disbelief.
“Yeah, no, I kept hoping a freak tornado or earthquake would come along and put me out of my misery.”
“So, I don’t have to worry about you running off with any promising young law students?” Deeks rolled his eyes at Kensi’s question. He thought she was mostly joking, but just in case, he cupped her jaw between his palms, cradling the back of her head and firmly kissed her. She made a noise of surprise in the back of her throat that quickly turned to satisfaction.
“Never. They’ll just have to find another incredibly attractive, middle aged teacher to chase after.” He kissed her again. When they pulled back, Kensi was smirking at him as she fiddled with his collar.
“You’re an idiot, but I love you anyway,” she said, pulling him back down to her.
***
A/N: I know nothing about law, other than what I googled.
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downwiththeficness · 3 years ago
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In the Bond-Chapter 23 (Final Chapter)
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Summary: Lilah often wished she’d never said yes to working with the Gecko brothers—usually while dodging gunfire. At no time was she regretting that decision more than when she’s hanging upside down from the ceiling, staring down a group of hungry culebras and one (1) extremely powerful sun god.
Word Count: ~7,950
Warnings: Violence, blood, the use of explosives, a bad movie reference, death (kind of)
A/N: This is an AU of my Story In the Blood, which can be read here. Basically, this fic explores what would have happened if Lilah had met up with Geckos before she met Brasa.
Taglist: @symbiont13  
Start from the beginning   Previous Chapter 
Read on AO3   Masterlist
They were once again sitting around the conference table looking at a map. In this instance, the squabbling had, thankfully, been kept at a minimum. With a common enemy between them, all the anger and mistrust of each other had been redirected outwardly. There was no sense in fighting with one another when a greater peril threatened them all.
Lilah had marked several points all along an open space in the desert—possible hideouts Benny had used in the past. Javier was currently working with a small, trusted crew to root out where he might be through other means. While waiting for new information, they developed about five plans, all centered around obliterating the ever loving hell out of him.
She’d given up on steering the plan into less violent territory, settling for making things as quick and as efficient as possible. Lilah wanted no more incidents of near-death for the people in this room, herself included. If that meant others had to die, then so be it.
Seth leaned back in his chair, “We won’t be able to get any further on this until we know where he’s holed up. I say we get some food.”
They’d been at it for hours, and though Lilah wasn’t particularly hungry, she was glad for the prospect of a break.
“Pizza?” Seth asked, turning to the only other person in the room not on a liquid diet.
Lilah shrugged, “Long as its not from that place across from the grocery.”
“Oh, come on,” Seth groused, “Its not that bad.”
“The health inspection code is a ‘C’,” she countered, “They found rats.”
“Not in the pizza.”
She leveled a stern look at him, “They found them in the fryers.”
Seth rolled his eyes, but relented, “Alright. I’ll pick another place.”
Lilah leaned on her elbows with an indulgent expression as Seth took out a phone and pulled up the website to order. The phone wavering in her vision, the reminder of how she’d been captured, made her flinch. She covered it by running her hand over the map, but not before Brasa felt it.
Sitting to her right, he had been texting frequently with Javier, relaying the updates as he got them. Sensing her unease, his thumbs paused over the screen as he mentally reached out to her.
Lilah rolled her shoulders, taking the comfort he offered. She had a mission to accomplish. She could cry about being kidnapped later. Belatedly, Lilah realized that the ‘deal with later’ pile was pretty damn big and she would definitely have to take some time to actually deal with it.
Richie, who had been checking in on Kate, tossed his phone onto the table, “Much as I hate to ask, I haven’t eaten since yesterday.”
Brasa gave a curt nod, “I’ll have something brought to us.”
“Its appreciated,” Richie replied in a rare instance of sincere, professional gratitude.
She took in Richie’s appearance. He looked...tired. As a man of nearly unbounded energy, to see the glint in his eye diminished was unsettling.
“I’m sorry about Jackknife’s,” she said, catching his attention.
He lifted a shoulder in affected nonchalance, “Its good. We’ll rebuild.”
That boded well. Lilah half expected to hear that he was moving on to another high risk, high yield project. That he was sticking with the place hinted at Kate’s grounding presence.
“Did the bar top survive?”
Richie smiled, “Yeah. Its a bit singed.”
“That’ll just give it character.”
“Fair point,” he conceded, pushing his glasses further up his nose, “We got interviews with contractors in a few weeks.”
She made a soft sound of praise, “Look at you, doing interviews, being official.”
His eyes dropped, demure, “We figured we should actually follow the policies you wrote.”
“That’s probably a good idea.”
Richie’s attention was momentarily taken by a staff asking him about his blood type preferences, and Lilah found herself staring at the map. The ground cover was too wide, she didn’t have enough supplies. There were too many unknowns for her to be comfortable with moving forward. It frustrated her to no end that she couldn’t just make a decision and be done with it—execute.
The door to the conference room opened and Javier strolled in. Dressed in all white, a gleaming silver cane tapping along beside him, he was smiling wide. Cat and canary.
“I have brought some guests.”
Two staff were each dragging along a single, fighting person. Lilah didn’t recognize them, but she caught their fangs flashing as they grunted in pain. Clothing bloodstained and ripped, they looked like they’d been in a serious fight—which she guessed they had.
Brasa stood, gloved hand sliding along the wood of the table as he circled it, “Do they have the information we need.”
Javier’s smile held, “I believe they do.”
“Good. Bring them to my office.”
“As you wish.”
Brasa watched them go, then turned to the group, “I will need to question them. You may remain here for the time being. Rest. Eat. I will return when I have Benny’s location.”
Lilah cut in, “I’m going with you.”
He fixed her with a hard look, “This is not an easy thing to do. I will very likely need to hurt them.”
She blinked, “I’m sorry, who in this room just got kidnapped? I think I’m owed a little time to take out some aggression.”
From his perch on the tabletop, Richie drawled, “She’s got a point.”
Brasa glared at Richie, earning himself an amused laugh. Then, he gave a single, curt nod, and reached out for her. Lilah took his hand and followed him out of the conference room and to his public office. The two chairs that normally sat in front of his desk had been pulled out so that they faced the walkway dissecting the room. In each sat a battered culebra—one with his head hanging down, the other glaring defiantly at no one in particular.
Lilah let Brasa lead her to them. His step slowed several paces away and he squeezed her hand before letting go. Lilah stopped where he left her, folding her hands in front of her body as she took in the scene.
Javier was standing off to the side, the staff having left prior to their arrival. His expression was relaxed, but she sensed a hardness underneath it. They’d done this before. Possibly hundreds of times over their unimaginably long lives. She drew in a breath to steady herself.
Brasa pushed his hands into his pockets as he regarded them, “What are your names?”
“Up yours,” came from the glaring one.
Without hesitation, and seemingly without thought, Brasa kicked out. His foot landed on the knee of ‘up yours’, the bone crunching audibly. Lilah felt her hands clench at the sound, but she managed to keep the wince from her face. ‘Up yours’ screamed in pain, his chin tilted up to the ceiling. He let out another, softer sound, then visibly calmed himself. He’d been prepped for this.
Stepping forward, Lilah edged around Brasa, one hand brushing his arm. She leaned down and caught the eye of ‘up yours’, “This will go much easier for you if you answer our questions.”
His glare returned, more fierce than before, “We’re prepared to die for this.”
Lilah nodded, two fingers touching his temple, “We’ll grant you that. Death is much better than what he,” she jerked her head towards Brasa, “is going to do to you if you refuse to cooperate.”
“Luis,” came a small voice to her right.
Lilah glanced over at him, “Luis. Is that you?”
He nodded.
“And this one?”
A hesitation, then, “Rafe.”
“Rafe,” Lilah echoed, turning her attention forward once again. “Where is Benny?”
Rafe pulled away from her touch, “Nowhere. Everywhere.”
She very nearly rolled her eyes. They knew that Benny had created a kind of weird mystique around himself and his mission. They also knew that he had cast them as the villains in the story. The technique made a lot of sense—it was still annoying as fuck.
A scoff from Brasa, followed by, “Spare us your delusions.”
Lilah straightened to standing, “Benny failed you over and over. Why continue to protect him?”
Luis cast her a look that was edging on pathetic, “He saved us.”
“From what?”
“From you,” Rafe answered, something more than derision in his voice. Hatred, perhaps.
Brasa moved. Slow. Relaxed. “Why would you need to be saved from us?”
Another answer from Rafe, “You are Xibalban. We know what you do to our kind.”
There it was. They’d been told enough to keep them scared—little truths that were coated in a thin, thin lie. Easy to swallow. Easy to accept. Easy to break.
“It is true that my people once committed inconceivable atrocities against yours,” Brasa allowed with a congenial dip of his head, “But that is not what I intend, nor is it what I will allow. Not any longer.”
Rafe sneered, “Liar.”
“Sometimes,” Brasa admitted, “When the moment calls for it. But, this is not that moment. I am not lying.”
Luis spoke, his lips trembling, “We don’t know that. You’ve been hunting us down. Killing us.”
Again, Brasa acknowledged the truth for what it was, “Only those who put us all at risk.”
Lilah could see how this was going to play out, could already hear the back and forth that would take time that they just didn’t have. Benny could strike again at any time, possibly with more firepower. Every second they spent debating right and wrong, good and bad, was a second that could cost the life of someone she cared about. Lilah made a decision.
Reaching into the pocket of Brasa’s slacks, she pulled out his knife, flipping the blade open. With deliberate slowness, she showed each of them the weapon. Then, she started talking.
“I’m going to give you an opportunity. The offer is time limited, and it will be given to only one of you.  Tell us where Benny is, and you live. First come, first serve.”
The room was quiet, save for the near constant snarls coming from Rafe. Lilah waited. Knife in hand, she simply let the quiet hold, let the uncomfortable stillness of silence make them squirm. If they knew Benny’s whereabouts, they’d tell her, and soon.
Luis broke first, “He’s in the tunnels, about ten miles north of where he...found you.”
The last two words were halting, as if he knew he shouldn’t say it, but couldn’t quite help himself. Next to her, Brasa growled low and long. She could feel the heat of his anger build both physically and within the confines of the bond.
“We have a winner,” she rasped, affected by how viscerally Brasa was emoting. Knowing that the longer they sat there, the risk of blood spilling would rise exponentially, Lilah turned from Brasa, “Javier, if you would, take Luis to be questioned further.”
“As you wish, Lady Lilah.”
Brasa held up a hand, “I want details, Javier. I want to know what Benny is planning.”
With a flourish, Javier hauled Luis up, tossing him towards the door, “I will take care of this.”
Luis landed hard on his knees, grunting in pain. But, he got up and let Javier lead him, limping, out of the room. The door closed with a kind of hard finality that eased Lilah’s anxiety. She felt Brasa’s confidence in Javier’s ability to get more of what they needed from Luis.
That left Rafe.
Lilah’s fingers gripped the knife, her jaw set, “Were you there when Benny took me?”
She didn’t recognize him, but she’d been hit pretty hard and had been too preoccupied with playing possum to memorize the faces of the people hauling her away. Beside her, Brasa removed his gloves.
Rafe shook his head.
“You’re sure?”
Another shake.
“I believe you.”
He visibly relaxed.
“But,” she continued, “I did say the offer would only be given to one of you.”
Rafe, knowing that she wasn’t going to relent, let out a sound of rage, rising unsteadily from the chair, hands outstretched towards her. He was stopped by Brasa’s hand around his throat. There was an almost too soft to hear pop as his larynx was crushed, the sound of his anger cut off with a wheeze.
Lilah closed the knife and slipped it back into Brasa’s pocket. Then, deliberately, she took a step back and crossed her arms. She’d said that she wanted vengeance, but exacting it with her own hands felt somehow unnecessary. All the fire that had been there five minutes before dissipated, leaving her feeling deflated.
Brasa had no such issues. His fingers curled deeper into Rafe’s throat, pushing beneath his skin. Blood welled up, dripping down the back of his hand to the floor. Lilah didn’t have to look at his eyes to know that they were red with rage, the glow of his power burning ever brighter beneath his skin. Flame burst from Rafe’s eyes, smoke wafting from his pores. He seared from the inside out, his body cracking into dust from the top down.
Brasa’s arm dropped, and he wiped the dust from his hands, his attention on the pile at his feet, “I should get a broom.”
Lilah looked at the spread of particles, trying hard not to think about the fact that it had once been a person, “We might have more important things to do right now.”
His brows quirked, “You might be right.”
***
Lilah stood at her station, well away from where the action would go down. The night was deep and dark, the new moon casting no light to guide their way. She looked over her equipment, one hand brushing over the black metal box sitting innocently to her right. Her laptop was gently whirring, all comms connected. At her thigh, her pistol rested in its holster, her knife strapped to her arm. Lilah hoped she wouldn’t have to use them.
According to Javier, Luis had talked freely, answered question after question. All of this was relayed to Lilah in detail until she felt like she had a good grasp on Benny’s plan. Brasa had sent Javier to set up the final blow, refusing to allow Lilah to do it, herself, as was her preference. She was too tired to argue, never having fully rested since the bomb had gone off two days before.
It was hard to think about it, the breakneck pace she’d been going at over that time. Lilah couldn’t even nail down if she’d slept properly, couldn’t remember eating or showering. And so, when Brasa had firmly pulled her into their room, she hadn’t resisted.
Assured that her friends were being taken care of, she’d let Brasa strip her down and run her a bath, let him wash her with soothing motions, until the water cooled And then, they’d tumbled naked into bed, the full darkness of the room letting her fall into a deep sleep.
She wished that she could say that she felt fully rested. While Lilah had slept for a long time, she had awoken groggy. Her body ached with something that wasn’t quite injury. She sleep walked through getting ready for the day, reluctantly eating a meal next to Seth, who sat drinking coffee while he cleaned his gun.
It wasn’t until she began to set up for the job that Lilah’s brain kicked in. This was it. They could be done with this awful mess today. If they succeeded, Lilah vowed to herself that she was going to do something fun—maybe rob a museum.
As she was contemplating this, heat built at her back. She looked up to find Brasa and Javier standing not far away. Brasa was wearing the familiar uniform of leather, sunglasses perched on his nose. Next to him, Javier was very much out of uniform. Instead of a sharply tailored suit, her wore thick canvas pants and a long sleeved shirt. He’d forgone his usual cane, a literal sword strapped to his hip.
“Are we set up?” She asked Javier.
With a deferential nod, he answered, “We are.”
“And you made sure to ground the connection—its just that it could go early if you—.”
Brasa laid a gentle hand on her shoulder, “He was very thorough. This will work.”
Lilah’s jaw shut with an audible click. She pursed her lips, the effort to hold back further questions not inconsequential. She busied her hands and her mind with activating the comms.
“McNamara online,” she said evenly.
It took a few seconds to get a response, but eventually she heard the click of the mic turning on.
“Richie Gecko online.”
“Oh, shut up,” Seth groused, “We’re in place.”
“You’re the one who said we should take this seriously.”
“Yeah, but this isn’t the fucking movies.”
Lilah rolled her eyes, “Alright. Hang tight while we get a lock on him.”
Tapping her mouse pad, Lilah opened the tracking app, “You think he’ll go for it?”
Javier shifted on his feet, “I believe he will. He’s already proven that he’ll sacrifice anyone and anything to protect his own skin.”
She stared at the little dots on the screen, “And Luis?”
“Running back to daddy,” he intoned, derision tainting his voice.
“You’re sure.”
He sighed, “I’ve done this a thousand times over. I know fear. I made him very, very scared before I let him go.”
The intensity with which he spoke, the unsaid threat in his tone, was enough to make Lilah drop the subject. She turned her attention to the screen, taking note of her location and the pair of dots indicating Seth and Richie. At the bottom left corner was a renegade dot that was steadily moving towards them. She watched it shift across the screen, pixels lighting up along the path.
It stopped at a fair distance from where the other two were congregated. Lilah held her breath as she waited for it to either stay where it was or start moving again. It stayed.
“He’s back,” Lilah murmured.
A flash of headlights appeared, lighting her station. She turned around in her seat, squinting at the car coming towards them.
“Is that one of ours?”
Brasa touched her shoulder, “It is. I should have warned you. Richie insisted.”
The car pulled up, dust swirling around the tires as it came to a stop. The engine and lights cut off, the driver’s side door opened. A dark head popped up, hair pulled into a high pony tail. Kate was dressed for practicality—jeans, t shirt, jacket, boots, gun. She closed the door, and walked confidently towards them.
Lilah waved at her, “Welcome to the party.”
She smiled wryly, “Richie said I couldn’t go with him, so I thought I would go with you.”
To be honest, Lilah was grateful for the extra support. It was often the case that she was alone, running the logistics, while others were executing her plan. Today, when the stakes were high, she found that she didn’t like the thought of being by herself.
Brasa took her hand, saying lowly, “Keep the bond open.”
She nodded, “Absolutely.”
“Good,” he leaned down and kissed her temple.
With a nod to Kate, Brasa turned from them. Javier stood a moment longer, his eyes absorbing Kate in detail. Then, he stepped back and followed his lord into the darkness.
Kate sighed with an odd kind of relief, “Well, what’s the plan?”
Lilah lifted a brow, “Richie didn’t tell you?”
“He said that he would be, quote, ‘fucking shit up’, but that’s as far as I got.”
That made sense. As if he’d gotten a power up in a video game, Richie had gotten some of his energy back as they neared the start of the job. As he’d loaded up the car, he’d been fairly vibrating with energy, a wide smile wrapped around a cigarette. Seth, on the other hand, had been stone cold sober—both literally and figuratively. The seriousness of his expression, the cant of his shoulders, told her that he was determined to get this done.
“Okay,” Lilah said, sliding into her chair, “This is Seth and Richie. And this,” she pointed to the errant dot, “is Luis. We’re fairly certain that he is heading back to Benny to tell him that we know his plan.”
Kate peered at the screen, “What was his plan?”
“To nuke the entire cave system, causing a sinkhole that spans across our entire territory.”
Eyes narrowing, Kate said, “That doesn’t make sense.”
Lilah cut her a glance, “What about it doesn’t make sense?”
“Benny’s schtick is all about how Brasa is destroying their way of life, right? What does taking down the cave system do.”
Lilah hesitated, her mind running through it, “I...think its because Brasa said they built it.”
“They did what?”
Hand waving to the land in front of them, “They built it—the Xibalbans. Its this huge maze of tunnels that are carved deep into the rock. I’ve only seen some of it, but its huge and complex and had to have taken forever to accomplish.” She paused, eyes scanning the middle distance, “I think that he made the caves a physical representation of their rule.  I mean, right?”
Kate cocked her head to the side, “That could be right. Benny could also be batshit crazy.”
“Fair point.”
“Well, we can pretty much guarantee that he’s going to change his plan, knowing that we know.”
Lilah shook her head, “If you’re right and he is batshit, then we don’t know that. Crazy isn’t always predictable.”
“That is a fair point.”
“Which,” Lilah added, tapping out a few commands, “means that we need to get a little more inside information.”
She cued up the sound, activating the comm Javier had placed carefully into Luis’ pocket on the way out. For a few minutes, she had to screw around with the settings, trying to get the best sound quality.
We should keep to the plan—Benny. Make their land unlivable, give them no place to retreat. Then, we pick them off like the parasites they are.
What about the Xibalban? Came a voice she didn’t recognize.
They’ll protect their bondmate first. When they realize the danger, they’ll come running.
Lilah reflexively looked around, trying to discern if they were going to be attacked from the deep black of the landscape around them.
“Could they know where we are?”
“No,” Lilah answered, feeling her shoulders drop, “No, they couldn’t.”
“Then…?” Kate prompted, her head shaking from side to side in confusion. “Oh no… get your phone.’
“What? Why?”
“They’re gonna finish off the bars,” Kate’s voice cracked, “We have to get the staff out of there.”
With a long line of curses falling from her lips, Lilah sent off a barrage of texts to the floor manager, telling them to get themselves and everyone else out of the building. As she did that, the conversation coming from the ear piece continued.
We should cut and run—Naya.
We run now, and we’ll keep running. We have to hit them where it will hurt.
Didn’t we already do that? Benny, you burned down his lair, you bombed both their bars—every time you try to hit them, they just keep...coming for us.
That was not untrue, and Lilah hated that she agreed with Naya. Her mouth turned down as she listened, half her attention on the phone in her hands as she waited for confirmation that the staff had been taken to safety.
They aren’t invincible, Naya.
Neither are you. A sigh. Maybe we should leave. Maybe we should just leave them here and go find a place for ourselves.
And let them win? There was that voice she didn’t recognize.
If we don’t fight now, we’re gonna end up like Luis, over there.
A heavy silence landed in the middle of the conversation, and Lilah could only guess that Luis had been killed after he’d told Benny that he’d talked.
We just found each other, Benny. I don’t want to lose you so soon.
You won’t. We’ll handle this, and then we can start our lives together.
The sincerity of his tone, the way Lilah could hear every emotion steeping into his words...It helped her to understand how so many people could believe him when he told them that they could succeed.
Brasa’s voice sounded from over the bond, We’re in the caves. Where should we go?
Lilah relayed Benny’s location, telling him to be careful. She avoided details about the secondary plan, about how Benny had wanted to distract him. It wasn’t necessary. She’d taken care of it, and would fill him in later.
“They’re headed for Benny. If he wiggles out of it again, Seth and Richie will herd him to the back up plan.”
“What is the back up plan?”
“We got incoming!”
Lilah tapped the keyboard, “Seth, what’s going on?”
“Got a group of ‘em heading towards us. Richie and I will take care of it.”
“Yeah, nothing we can’t handle.”
Lilah nodded, even though they couldn’t see her, “Be safe. Don’t do anything stupid. If it gets too hairy, cut and run.”
There was a pause, then, from Seth, “Duly noted, boss.”
Unable to listen to the gunfire she knew was coming, Lilah cut the line. Next to her, Kate checked her phone, tapping on the screen a few times.
“What’s left of Jackknife’s is empty. The staff have gone to ground.”
“Good, good.”
Lilah’s phone had been silent, no response from the manager. She hoped that meant they were taking care of business and hadn’t been killed in the second wave. Her stomach rolled with regret that she hadn’t thought he’d attack there again, that she may have inadvertently put both her staff and the remaining injured culebras in danger.
We knew you’d be here—Benny.
Apparently, Brasa and Javier had arrived. She found herself leaning into the computer as she listened.
This needs to stop, Brasa’s voice was deceptively soft. She could feel how he was going to stop things, how much it took to say what came next, The two of you can go. We just want him.
Not a chance.
I can’t leave him.
This was said simultaneously, but Lilah could pick apart the variation in tone. The unknown man spitting the words out, Naya’s voice soft and weak and desperate. She resisted feeling sorry for either of them.
We will take him by force, Javier pronounced, and she could hear some rustling, then, We don’t want you, but we will go through you.
More rustling, I’m not afraid to die. And, if I get to take you out with me, that’s a bonus.
And then there was a bang that preceded the comm cutting off entirely. Lilah stared at the screen, one finger tapping on the keyboard to try to bring the sound back. No use. It was fried. Closing her eyes, Lilah reached across the bond to find that Brasa far away, further than he’d been since the beginning of all this.
She couldn’t tell if he was hurt, or if he was putting distance between them so that he could concentrate on doing what needed to be done, so that he could shield her from it.
“How fast is your car?”
Kate smiled, “Pretty damn.”
“Let’s go.”
It wasn’t until they were speeding away that Kate actually asked where they were going, “I’m literally hauling ass through the dark, here.”
Lilah pulled up her phone, opening the tracking app for the comms. She had the last location of Brasa, the little dot shining from somewhere below the ground. And then there were the two dots signifying the brothers. They were a little further South than they had been, but they were moving.
She opened the line, “Guys, you there?”
A click, “Yeah, we’re here. Kind of busy, though.”
Then, Seth cut in, “These fuckers just keep coming.”
Lilah swallowed down her rising nerves, “We’ve lost contact with Brasa and Javier. We’re gonna check it out.”
A few shots fired, the sound of it making Lilah wince. Seth’s voice followed, rough with exertion, “That’s a bad idea. He can handle himself.”
“I think,” Lilah croaked, “I think they had the same idea we did.”
There were more shots, intermittently cut through with unintelligible yelling. Lilah tried not to think about what was going on, knowing that her mind was far more creative than was typical of reality. Instead, she focused on directing Kate while she waited for a response that she might not get.
“Ah, fuck!”
“What happened?”
“Got clipped in the side,” Seth ground out, “Its not deep. I’m good.”
He wasn’t talking to her. She could tell. He was reassuring his brother.
“Quit getting hit,” Richie demanded, “We got people to kill.”
“Yes, Richie, that’s so helpful.”
Knowing that she wasn’t going to get them to focus, and the attempt might result in another injury, Lilah turned down the volume and pointed to the left of the car, “That’s about where they were.”
Kate pulled to a stop, shutting the car off, “What do you want to do?”
“I want to find him, and I want to ring his neck for leaving me in the dark.”
“Alright.”
Pull her gun from its holster, Lilah exited the car, using the headlights to peer around, “I don’t see anything.”
Kate had followed her example, a nine millimeter pointed towards the ground in front of her, “I don’t either.”
“They must still be in the caves, or—,” Lilah cut herself off as she spotted a plume of dust settling not too far away.
Kate followed her gaze, her mouth thin as she concentrated, “You think…?”
“Yeah,” Lilah breathed, “We need to be careful. The ground looks unstable.”
And indeed it did. Fissures cut through the rock below, the surface shattered in some places. Lilah eased forward, stepping back quickly when her foot sunk deep.
“Okay, what do we do?” Kate asked, taking a few steps back her eyes flicking back and forth.
“I don’t know.”
In the distance, something blew up. Another. And another. The sound came from all around them. Lilah could feel vibrations in her feet, in her chest, her hair standing on end.
“The fuck?”
Kate grabbed her arm, “The plan—they planned to blow the caves.”
Lilah stared at her, her mind slowly working to put the pieces together.
“He wasn’t going to hit the bars,” Kate said, her eyes shining with intensity, “He was going to bring us here. He knew you’d feel the hit to Brasa, knew you’d come here.”
Lilah looked down. Another bomb went off. There was no telling how many more there were, or when the ground beneath them would crumble. Angry and afraid, she reached out, slamming through the bond as it stretched thin.
I’m here. I’m fine. Javier is fine. We are near your post.
As relieved as she was to hear it, she cut through his reassurances, I already came to you. I followed the comm. Kate and I are standing on the caves.
She sensed his fear, sensed that he’d turned and was running back towards her, I’m coming.
No, no, that’s what he wants. You need to head towards Seth and Richie. They’re the next stop. Kate and I will get out of this.
Kate was already moving to the car, ushering Lilah along. Inside, she slammed the transmission into drive and they hauled ass away.
“We need to get to Seth and Richie,” Lilah said, pulling out her phone.
As she expected, their dots were moving towards the rendezvous points. Unexpectedly, the comm they’d planted on Luis was also moving. It had reconnected to the tracking system, and was flying in a twisting pattern towards the Geckos.
Lilah glared at it, flinching as a bomb went off a little too close for comfort. Kate was driving fast, the car eating up road as the engine roared. If it had been anyone else at the wheel, Lilah might have worried for her safety. As it was, Kate was a notoriously skilled getaway driver, having honed the talent over many jobs.  
She hesitated, her finger hovering over the connection button on the app. Her hunch could be wrong.
Mouth curling, Lilah connected to the comm, “You still alive?”
There was rustling along the line, a bit of feedback, then, “I am alive and well.”
“Wish I could say that I’m glad to hear it, Benny.”
He chuckled, the sound coming out forced, “Good thing I don’t give a fuck about your happiness.”
“I’ve noticed.”
“I’m guessing that you can see where I’m heading.”
“I can.”
“Good,” he bit out, “Then you’ll know when I’ve taken care of your friends.”
“You’re not going to make it that far, Benny.”
“We’ll see.”
The comm disconnected from his side. Lilah sighed and shut down the app. She pushed her phone into the pocket of her sweatshirt and fiddled with the edge of one of her sleeves.
“We almost there?”
Lilah nodded. Whatever she might have answered was cut off as a bomb went off too close to the car, the ground exploding outwards. Rocks shattered the windows on the driver’s side, the car swerving as Kate tried to keep control. A second bomb went off a moment later, the back side of the car lifting about ten feet. As it slammed back down, Lilah could hear the axle crack, knew instinctively that they had to get out, and fast.
“Out! Out!” Lilah cried as she threw off her seat belt.
Disoriented, Lilah stumbled as she got out of the car, looking over the body to see Kate slamming the door closed and rounding the hood.
“You alright?”
Lilah nodded, “I’m good. The car’s fucked, though.”
As if on cue, a bomb went off maybe a hundred yards away, and the ground shifted. Lilah felt it in a way that she couldn’t describe, an intangible feeling that scared her more than she’d ever been scared before. In between one second and the next, the ground sunk down, caving in on itself. The hole grew bigger, yawning ever wider as it worked to swallow them whole.
“Run!”
Lilah had never, never made her feet move so fast. The air whipped at her as each step slammed into the ground. The roaring in her ears was only tempered by the sound of her own breathing. A glance over her shoulder saw the car rear up before falling down into the depths, cutting off the light. Gritting her teeth, she dug into her pocket, her stride slowing as she keyed up the flashlight on her phone.
The path before them was illuminated, much good that it did them. On either side of them, the ground trembled. They weren’t going fast enough. They were going to fall.
Brasa…
He heard her, but his answer was overpowered by the way the ground fell out from under her. Lilah’s arm was caught by Kate, who dragged her to the side.
“Over there, the rock formation. That’s the safest bet.”
Not in a place to argue, Lilah followed Kate’s lead, pushing through the burn and strain of her muscles. As they neared, a tiny flicker of hope swelled, urging her to just keep moving. Lilah obeyed the feeling, arms pumping, breath punching in and out.
Another huge chunk of ground swelled up and dropped, the rumbling sound of crunching rock following. She veered, moving with Kate towards the only goal in sight.
Scrambling up, Lilah climbed as quickly as she could, digging her feet into the stone and scraping her palms. Behind her, in front of her, to her left and right, the earth roiled. She could hear more of the cave system crumble in on itself, taking whoever might be inside with it.
Near the top, with Kate huffing at her side, Lilah turned and watched the disaster unfold. It was a sight she would never forget. The whole world, as far as she could see it, rocked up and down, sinking and rising, turning over almost completely.
“He meant for us to be in that,” Kate said, the barest tremble in her voice.
“He did.”
“Fuck this guy.”
“Yeah,” Lilah said, when she could find her voice again. “Fuck this guy.”
Kate closed her eyes, and Lilah didn’t even have to guess at what she was doing. She drew in a breath to follow suit.
I’m okay. We got out.
Let me through.
Have you found Seth and Richie?
Let me through.
Tell me. Did you find them.
I...did.
And?
Seth’s hurt. We can’t stop the bleeding.
Horrified, Lilah opened her eyes, catching a similar expression on Kate’s face. She made a decision.
“Tell Richie to let you through.”
Not waiting for an answer, Lilah reached out to the bond, got a good grip, and pulled. The world tipped over, and Lilah landed hard on her knee, dry heaving.
“You could have just asked,” Brasa griped from not far away. Then, “Are you alright?”
She nodded, swallowing.  As she looked up, Lilah caught Kate landing next to Richie, who was already bending down to help her up. Next to Richie was an ashen Seth. He was leaning against their car, blood soaking clean through almost the entirely of the front of his button down. His suit jacket was crumbled a few feet away, along with his gun holsters. He looked like he was going to try to stand, took a single step, and crumpled down in a heap.
“You look like shit.”
Seth started to laugh, the sound cut off by a groan of pain, “Fuck you, too.”
Ambling over to him, Lilah sat on her heels, “We need to get you to a hospital.”
He shook his head, “I’m good here. Could use a drink, though.”
“Don’t need to thin your blood any more than it already is,” Lilah shot back, “You’re hurt. This isn’t just a flesh wound.”
“Benny got in a good shot, I’ll give him that.”
Lips sneering, Lilah said, “We’ll get him back for this. We still have an ace up our sleeve.”
Seth sucked his teeth, blood coating the enamel, “You need to be getting to that ace.”
“Not until I know you’re going to make it.”
He was already shaking his head, “This isn’t something you come back from.”
Seth lifted the hand that had been staunching the blood, a spurt shooting out with every beat of his heart until he covered it again.
Lilah to a moment to think, “You can. You can come back from this. Richie can help you.”
She knew the moment that he understood what she was saying. She also knew that he was going to refuse.
“I’m not having this asshole,” he pointed to his brother, “Hold it over me for eternity, thank you very much. I’ve had enough of that already.”
“Are you seriously arguing about this while you’re dying?”
Seth glared at her, though the effect was somewhat diminished by the fact that he was struggling to focus.
Lilah laid a hand over his, worried by the cool skin beneath her fingers, “Then, let me do it.” Surprised by her own words, she glanced up at Brasa, “I can do it, right?”
His mouth parted, closed, parted again, and then he nodded, “Yes. Your blood is my blood, and blood is the conduit.”
Turning her attention back to Seth, Lilah lifted her brows in question, “It’ll be better if its me, right?”
He was quiet for a long time, so long that Lilah began to feel the hope that had sparked while the earth trembled beneath her feet begin to fade. And then he nodded.
Hand digging into her sweatshirt, Lilah pulled out her knife. She rolled it into her other hand. And then, before she could question it, she dug the blade in. Carefully, Lilah dripped the steady stream into Seth’s mouth.
He took a deep gulp, then tried to pull away. Lilah cradled the back of his head, holding him to the wound, her eyes lifting once more to her bondmate.
“How much?”
Brasa’s eyes were fixed where Seth’s mouth met her skin, “A bit more.”
Lilah held her position for a minute or two more, focused enough on her task that she didn’t hear the conversation going on around her. Then, when she thought it might be enough, she pulled away. Seth, already weak, couldn’t keep his head up. His eyes were rolled back, forehead clammy.
“How long does it take?”
This time, Richie answered, “It depends, but not long. I’ll stay with him. You guys go after Benny.”
Kate moved to stand next to Richie, “I’ll stay with him, too. He’ll need someone here who won’t rib him for ‘coming to the dark side’.”
The last little bit of that sentence was said with heavy sarcasm and a pair of finger quotes.
Lilah sheathed her knife and stood, “You’ll let me know that he’s okay.”
With half a smile, Richie tapped the ear piece, “I’ll give you live updates.”
“Thanks.”
Brasa moved to her side, holding up the little metal box from her station, “I thought you might need this.”
Lilah took it gratefully, “I do. Thank you.” She rose up on her tip toes and kissed him lightly, “Let’s go kill this shithead.”
After settling Seth as comfortably as possible, Lilah took the keys to the car from Seth’s coat and hopped into the driver’s side. Brasa’s body dropped into the passenger’s side, Javier nimbly climbing into the back.
She rolled down the window, pointing at Richie, “Real time updates.”
He gave her a little salute and shooed her away, his focus turning to his brother.
It surprised Lilah how quickly they arrived at the rendezvous point, though it was nowhere near where they’d found Seth and Richie. Over the horizon, the sky was beginning to grow pink with the rising of the sun. She pulled to a stop a good distance away from where she knew Benny would be.
If all had gone to plan, they would have all been sitting here, watching this. Lilah comforted herself with the knowledge that they were at least unhurt, mostly. Seth would get better, would be healed before she got back.
Opening the door, Lilah got out, closing it behind her, the black box tucked beneath her arm. She didn’t bother looking for Brasa and Javier to follow, already moving around the huge boulder she’d parked behind. Pulling out her phone, she checked the dot representing Benny. He was right where she wanted him to be.
Below, the rock face sheered off, giving her the best view of the helipad just across a flowing river. Lilah breathed in the cool morning air, wind blowing gently.
Brasa leaned against the rock to her right, glasses reflecting the world below, “I can do it, if you want.”
Lilah looked at him.
“You don’t have to do it, if you don’t want to.”
She caught the glimmer of Javier as he stood at a respectable distance, felt the subtle change in light as the sun continued to rise. The night seemed far away already. The anxiety. The fear. The relief. It all felt as if it were a dream. And yet, here she stood, at the precipice of committing the final act in their plan. She felt no hesitation. She felt no fear. Lilah wasn’t quite sure she could feel much of anything.
“I got it,” she said finally.
And she did—have it.
Looking down, Lilah opened the box, her thumb flicking each of the toggles upwards until red turned green. In the distance, she heard the blades of the helicopter begin the turn. She looked down. Two figures ran for the craft.
“Is that him?” She asked Brasa, knowing that his eyes were infinitely better than hers.
He craned his neck, looking down his nose, “Yes.”
Without thinking, she tapped the comm, “You still alive?”
From across the distance, Benny laughed, “I am. Tell me, is Seth?”
She sneered, “He is.”
“Shame,” Benny replied, unrepentant. Then, with a light, conversational tone, “Hey, McNamara, looks like we’ll be seeing each other again sometimes.”
They wouldn’t.
“Hey, Benny,” she shot back, “looks like you’re on the wrong side of the river.”
Lilah waited a moment more, watching as the two figures climbed inside.
She pressed the button.
The explosion was small—or, perhaps it was only small because she’d seen so many up close not an hour before. From around the helipad, the explosives went off. In a succession of fifteen or so, they obliterated the ground beneath, until it began to crumble in on itself. And then, just for good measure, the helicopter, itself, detonated. Lilah watched until the whole thing fell into the hole the first blast had created, then closed the box and looked to Brasa.
“I want to go home.”
And that’s what they did. They found Seth, Richie, and Kate where they’d left them. Stuffing everyone into the car, they went back to the bar. Lilah was not ashamed to be relieved that the place was still standing. In their absence, the elevator had been fixed. It opened to workers still making repairs, a fine smattering of dust on every surface.
Tired, and half awake, the group filed into the conference room. Seth was laid out on the tabletop. As was his way, Javier was already arranging for food, liquor, and blood to be brought to them. As Lilah moved to sit, Brasa pulled her away from the chair she’d pulled out. With quiet care, he gathered her into his lap, holding her around the waist.
She wasn’t surprised to see Richie doing the same with Kate, though he was watching his brother very closely.
“When will he wake up?” she asked.
“Any minute,” Richie answered, his voice even and sure.
“How do you know?”
“Because Javier is bringing a bottle of shitty bourbon and you know he can’t resist.”
She laughed, some of the feeling coming back to her. Resting against Brasa, she watched as Seth laid on the table, unmoving.  He’d been asleep for so long that she was doubting her decision. Sensing her unease, Brasa ran a hand up her back. Up and down. Calming.
Her shoulders didn’t move from where she’d had them bunched up by her ears until Seth drew that first, ragged breath. The relief coursed through her, tears dotting her cheeks. Sniffing, she wiped them away, resting an elbow on the table as leaned forward.
Richie eased Kate to the side, rising. He took a few steps around the table, lifting a hip and sitting not far from Seth’s head.
“Welcome back, brother.”
“Fuck. You.”
Richie laughed, “Glad to see you’re going to still be cranky when you wake up.”
“I died, you asshole.”
“I know. I was there.”
Seth tried to sit up, dropping heavily back down, “Fuck.”
The door to the conference room swung open, Javier pulling a cart in behind him.
Richie smiled, “Breakfast is here.” Then, softer, “You need to feed, Seth.”
Lilah though he would fight, thought he would grumble and pout until the hunger took over. And yet, when Richie held the bag out to him, Seth took it. With ease that could only come from watching someone do it over and over, he tore into the plastic, and drank it down.
Standing hesitantly, Lilah crossed into his field of vision. He drew back from the bag, breathing hard, game face on.
“Hey.”
He swallowed hard, “Hey.”
“You feel ok?”
One shoulder lifted, “For having nearly died, I feel pretty good.”
“Cool.” Then, “You want to steal a Renoir with me later?”
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cami-chats · 3 years ago
Text
Cats Get Dates
Fandom: Marvel, The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Pairing: Five Hargreeves/Tony Stark
Warnings: None
On AO3 or below
Tony didn't think about it too much before putting up the sign in his window. He felt kind of stupid as he did it-- and also like he was in that one Taylor Swift music video-- but also, that cat was super cute and he wanted to know its name. Calling it 'the stupidly cute, fluffy cat' when he was telling Jim about it was getting a little lengthy; not to mention Jim had thought he was talking about more than one cat for about six months.
Your cat's really cute. So white and fluffy, I love them was what the sign said, but it was enough. With the way windows and floors worked in these weirdass apartment buildings, he wasn't risking much by admitting the cutest cat in the world was, in fact, the cutest cat in the world to a bunch of strangers other than the one stranger he had in mind.
The next day, there was a sign in the window with an arrow pointing down to the cat's favorite lounging spot: Mr. Pennycrumb (yes, really).
Tony wasn't the best artist, but he did a pretty good rendition of Mr. Pennycrumb in a suit, with a monocle and a walking stick. I love him. He didn't hesitate to put that one up either, and he thought that would be the end of it.
He should've known that the universe would decide to throw him a nice little curveball. The next time he peeked across the street to see if Mr. Pennycrumb was taking a nap or licking his paw, he instead saw a handsome man with a criminal jawline sitting in the window, writing in a notebook.
Tony was just tired enough to sit at his own desk and stare an unreasonable amount.
Mr. Pennycrumb's owner looked up after a while and saw him. He raised an eyebrow.
Tony reached for the poster that had his drawing of Mr. Pennycrumb in a suit-- which he kept by the window simply because he wanted to keep the drawing but didn't have any other place to put it-- and held it up. Then he set it down and put his hands together in a pleading fashion.
The cat owner smirked in a very self-satisfied manner, then disappeared for a moment. When he came back, he had Mr. Pennycrumb in his arms. He plopped him in front of the window, where the cat was happy to stretch out and roll onto his back.
Tony blew him a kiss, and he was glad when the other man chuckled before turning back to his writing. Cause otherwise that would've been really awkward. Mr. Pennycrumb was unfairly adorable, and definitely worth a little embarrassment for, if the situation ever called for it. Plus, if the cat's owner had figured out that Tony was checking him out, he might've decided to close his shades, and that would've been a real tragedy.
*
Their first real, face-to-face contact came sometime after three in the morning when the two of them were the only people with both their lights on and their shades open.
Mr. Pennycrumb's owner was the one to initiate it with a note in his window that read, Do you have coffee?
Tony wrote back. Yes.
Can I have some? Everywhere's closed. And it was true. Everywhere was closed, but fuck only knew why. There was a college in this city; surely there was at least one cafe that could turn a profit from running twenty-four hours. There were grocery stores that were still open, but the closest one was two blocks away-- considerably further than across the street, and a lot more of a pain.
In response, Tony wrote down his apartment number. Someone with a cat that cute wouldn't murder him after asking for coffee. If there were two good qualities a person could have, it would be liking coffee and loving their cat. Or maybe it was loving coffee and liking their cat. Either way, it was good combination to have. Not to mention that Tony was infinitely more likely to be kidnapped, not murdered flat out. And the kidnapping type had the same look about them, which Mr. Pennycrumb's owner did not have.
When he saw the man's light go off, he got up to make a new pot of coffee. He still had some in there for himself, so he dumped the rest of it in a spare mug and started a new one. He had a huge ass thermos around here somewhere-- a gift from Jim, and he'd made sure it was big enough for a pot of coffee plus all the cream that Tony liked to add, because Jim was the best gift-giver in the entire world.
As Tony crawled in a cupboard to find it, he wondered why he didn't use it more often. Usually, it was to avoid questions. If people asked him one question, they took it as an invitation for more conversation, which was pretty much the opposite of what Tony wanted when he was carrying around a pot of coffee.
It was only after he unearthed it that he remembered Jim had sort of taken it away for a week when Tony had decided to brew his coffee with an energy drink instead of water. It had tasted like shit, but it had kept him awake enough to keep up with his coursework while also finishing off the designs for the upcoming expo and giving his notes to Howard about the latest prototype. Now that that horrible time had passed though, he should be able to start using it again.
Someone knocked on the door as he was halfway through pouring the coffee into the giant thermos, so he put it down to answer the door. As expected, it was the neighbor-- if neighbor could be used to describe someone that lived in a separate building on the opposite side of the road. He was even more handsome up close, which was a dangerous thing to be noticing in the middle of the night when his self-control was wearing thin. He didn't have much of a filter to begin with, and it only became thinner when he was tired.
"Hey," the possibly-a-neighbor but definitely-the-cute-cat-owner said. "Thanks for this."
"Yeah, no problem. I can't make it a day without coffee." Tony sort of forgot to invite him in, but he turned to go finish pouring the coffee and figured that his sort-of-neighbor would either follow him in or stay in the doorway. Tony would be very tempted to ask him to stay forever if he had remembered to ask him inside in the first place. As he started to pour the remainder of the pot, he heard the door close, and a second later, the guy walked into the kitchen. "I'm Tony, by the way."
"Five. Yes, like the number."
"Your parents weren't very imaginative."
"Actually, I only have one sibling."
"That's even worse."
"I've always thought so," Five said mildly.
"Is there a story there or are they just weird as shit?"
Five snorted. "If they had reasons, they never bothered to share them with me." Then he tilted his head curiously. "Does that thermos fit an entire pot of coffee?"
"Yep."
"That's amazing. Where did you get it?"
"It was a gift, so I don't know."
"Hm, shame."
Tony screwed the lid on and held it out to him.
"Thanks."
"No problem."
"I'll try to have it back in a couple days."
"Sure. And if you forget, I can always add it to a sign when I'm asking about Mr. Pennycrumb. How is he anyways?"
"A pain in the ass," Five said, rolling his eyes as they walked to the door. "He was playing with a plastic bag, got his head caught, flipped out, and ended up shredding it over half the apartment."
"And that's why I admire other people's cats from afar instead of getting my own."
"A wise decision," Five said flatly, but with a hint of a smile across his mouth. Tony had the strong urge to kiss him, but he was too far away for Tony to do it as an impulse decision. "See you around."
"Yep, see you."
Having a crush from a distance had been weird and a little creepy of him, but he didn't think the one minute of conversation with Five really justified it. If anything, it made it worse. Jim would probably tell him to be a normal neighbor and not make contact unless they were passing each other on the street-- but then, Jim was also convinced that Tony was going to be murdered horribly in the middle of the night because he hadn't been looking where he was going, so Tony took everything he said with a grain of salt.
*
Tony got back to his apartment one day to find a bag hanging on the door. He peeked inside and saw that it was the thermos he'd loaned Five, so he picked it up and brought it in with him.
He forgot to put it away for a while, so it was almost a week later when he grabbed the thermos to use it and a picture fell out. Curious, Tony reached for it, then he laughed. It was a polaroid of Mr. Pennycrumb. He was sitting up straight, fluffy tail curled around the front of his little feet and looking intensely at the camera-- or, rather, the person holding the camera, but it was the same effect. On the white bottom, Five had written 'Thanks' in sharpie, in all caps like he was an old man.
Tony hung it on the fridge, then went back to putting his bag together for the day.
*
The next contact came when Tony was settling in for the evening, ready to stay up all night writing code, only to realize that he didn't have enough sugar for his coffee to last all night. Fuck. Fuck, fuck, and fuck some more, he was not going to make it through the night unless he had caffeine and sugar. He glanced out the window automatically and saw that Five's light was on, and he was sitting at his desk.
There was no guarantee that he'd look up, but Tony had to try.
Do you have sugar?
Five looked up when he held the sign in front of his window. He reached to the side and wrote, and a moment later, Tony was reading what he'd written. Only if you'll come over here to get it.
Tony nodded vigorously. He could definitely walk over there. No way in hell was he going to ask Five for a favor and then expect for him to walk over to Tony's place.
Five flipped over his paper and wrote his apartment number.
Tony got up, shoved on some shoes, and hurried over. It was a good thing that it was a short walk, because it was kind of cold out, and he hadn't grabbed a jacket.
It was barely five seconds after he knocked that the door opened. "How much sugar do you need?"
"I don't know, maybe a cup?" Tony said. "It's for my coffee."
"You put sugar in your coffee?" Five asked, raising an eyebrow judgmentally.
"You don't?" Tony asked, mirroring his expression. "I guess that's fine, if you want to be miserable."
Five rolled his eyes and walked to the kitchen, pouring sugar from a large bucket to a smaller container. "Is that enough?"
"Yeah, thanks."
Five put the lid on and handed it over. Then, scarcely after Tony had his hands on it, Five put a scrap of paper on top. "That's my number. You can use it the next time you need sugar instead of hoping I look up at the right time."
Tony's heart decided to be a traitorous little bastard and started beating faster, but he hoped it didn't show in his voice when he said, "Cool; I'll do that. Thanks again," he said.
He made it back over to his apartment, saved Five's number in his phone, then sent him a text.
This is Tony, so you have my number too.
He tossed his phone onto the desk and went to pour some sugar in his coffee. On the desk, his phone buzzed with a new message.
Good to know, was all Five said. A minute later, he sent a photo of Mr. Pennycrumb. It was obvious that he'd just taken it, and the cat was glaring at him as it sat atop his laptop keyboard. The King of the universe says hello.
Tell him I love him.
And have it go to his head? But your message has been passed on.
*
Things continued in that vein for a while. Five would send him pictures of Mr. Pennycrumb in various poses-- Tony's favorite was the one where the cat had climbed into the filled bathtub and then squalled about it like it was Five's fault-- and in return, Tony would gush about how cute Mr. Pennycrumb was.
After a couple weeks of that, they started complaining about their class work, which rapidly turned into helping each other. It's not that either of them was stupid or refused to do their own work, but Five's grasp of physics was much better than Tony's (to say nothing of his understanding of chaos theory), and in return, Tony helped him with the finer points of chemistry.
And since they were helping each other with work, they might as well meet in person rather than halting texts back and forth whenever they remembered to check their phone. Tony didn't think anything of it until it was leading up to the end of the semester and he went to Five's favorite coffee shop to buy him a cup before he headed over-- instead of just letting him brew coffee like normal. Since when did Tony go out of his way to do something nice? The answer used to be: hardly ever. Now, it looked like the answer was: for about three weeks. Because he'd been doing things to try and be nice to Five for a while, even if it inconvenienced him.
With his usual tact, Tony knocked on the door and as soon as Five answered, he asked, "Are we dating?"
"We won't be if you don't hand over the coffee," Five said, his eyes going straight to the cup with laser focus.
Tony handed it over.
Five took a sip, savored it, then brushed a kiss over Tony's cheek. "Come on, I ordered your shitty pizza, and it's useless if it goes cold."
Tony walked in, closing the door behind him. Well, the kiss answered that question. Or maybe it was the way that Five had answered his question. Either way, Tony now had a boyfriend, and that was wonderful. "It makes a wonderful snack four hours into studying," Tony argued. He knew this for a fact after a dozen times of doing it. "You can shove it in your mouth without tasting it, and you don't have to wait for something to be delivered."
"Congratulations," Five said flatly. "I'm not trying it."
"Fine, suffer then." 
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