#i rly wanted to see more of the angels Being Brothers in canon
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the fic is going
#midam got done so dirty in canon#should have faced off against alt michael#fanfiction#if i start posting about this fic it needs a tag#->#exodus my behated#dont have a title yet so#supernatural#gabriel supernatural#i rly wanted to see more of the angels Being Brothers in canon#imagine michael and raphael learning their baby brother who went missing is alive
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October 2022 Art (OC-tober)
All my drawings for OC-tober 2022! I did miss out Day 9 + Day 22, I think coz the prompts weren't specific to any of my OCs, but I was happy to get a unique OC drawn for 29 whole days! I'll list the prompts below too
vvv dates + info under the cut vvv
1, 2, 3 - 01-02-03/10/2022 : (The Care Taker ; The Crazy One ; The Guide)
Raven, Calypso, and Sean - Raven being something of a caretaker, caring for her little brothers, and even taking on her infant half siblings, she's very busy all of the time... Calypso, yeah hes just crazie. Sean I figured is a maths teacher, he probably teaches Noah, and is a mentor to him
4, 5, 6 - 04-05-06/10/2022 : (The Grump ; The Beauty ; The Evil One)
Ruben, Antonia, and Russula - Ruben is definitely grumpy, I think the only thing that could make him smile is if you present him with some nice cheeses, or do something really stupid :p Toni, ofc is beautiful, she takes a lot of pride in her appearance, oh the style!! i wanna be her!! Russula.. isnt "evil", not really, but shes a demon lady so thats as close as you'll get x
7, 8, 9 - 07-08-10/10/2022 : (The Pet Owner ; The Mechanic ; The Quiet One)
Wren, Delilah, and Jay - I like thinking Wren would, at some point, have a guide dog, though it's not really canon unfortunately. Delilah is one of my Ace Attorney OCs! The daughter of Ron & Desiree, she definitely has a knack for mechanics, even at such a young age. Jay is like the "fly on the wall" of the Maedas, so is Robin tbf, I think both of them sit in a corner and stare, but yeah totally quiet, unless he feels like being snarky, he just sits and is judgemental
10, 11, 12 - 11-12-13/10/2022 : (The Handsome One ; The Thief ; The Best Friends)
Copper, Angel, Blaire + Ginger - Copper is handsome!!! thats all really. Angel is another of my AA OCs, Delilah's grandma, actually, like Ron she's a thief, though it's more serious stuff, Angel might not even be her real name, who knows! Blaire and Ginger are beloved to me, best friends who found each other thru drag!
13, 14 - 14-15/10/2022 : (The Gun Lover ; The Cutie pie)
Richie and Robin - Richie isn't a "gun lover" exactly, only that he has a gun for an arm, sometimes, which he loves, but yea he might be a bit "and then i started blastin"... and Robin is a cutie pie! I've updated his design since this, but he's still cute <3
15, 16, 17 - 16-17-18/10/2022 : (Someone Else's OC (Mitzi from @creaturedrawz) ; The Helper ; The Nature Lover)
Mitzi, Susie, and Buttercup - i hadn't drawn Mitzi yet and i rly wanted to bc i love her... i need to draw for others more x ,, Susie, ofc is very helpful, super friendly and outgoing, and Buttercup is a farm boy, despite living in the city he still ofc has a huge love of nature
18, 19, 20 - 19-20-21/10/2022 : (The Father ; The Siblings ; The Girl Next Door)
Felix, Una + Zin, and Penny - Felix... ugh.. da dad evar... i love his swag ass gay boy style... Una n Zin, some of my IZ OCs, they're siblings, but, it's complicated, they consider each other siblings anyway thats all that matters, Una worries abt him a lot. PENNY, ms americas sweetheart that penny. she is battling demons in hell, with her boobs (gay)... she used to be human, but since fucking. dying. shes having a gradual transformation x
21, 22, 23 - 23-24-25/10/2022 : (The Gang Leader ; The Sad One ; The Gamer)
Caspian, Rushada, and Pumpkin - Caspian isn't a gang leader, but he would get wrapped up in gangs, but dont worry he turns it around <3 Rushada my beloved sadgirl.. again its funny to see her before i gave her a slight redesign, i liked her hands in this one tho. Pumpkin is a gamer, in his gamer zelda shirt and gamer cargo shorts, thats about it
24, 25, 26 - 26-27-28/10/2022 : (The Mother ; The Power Within ; The Lovers)
Alice, Lafayette, Gizmo + Jasmine - Alice <3 my scouse ma.. she kinda just is The mother of my ocs ig ,, Lafayette, i still haven't figured out anything too concrete about his lore, but the hidden power thing is something i feel fits him. Jasmine n Gizmo have been my standout married couple ocs for years now, i just never draw Gizmo LOL, so this is still the most recent thing of him... oops
27, 28, 29 - 29-30-31/10/2022 : (The Scientist ; The Marked One ; The Goddess)
Daffy, Luna, and Rosaline - Last stretch..... im getting tired of typing....... Daffy likes to picture himself as a mad scientist but hes just a dorky autistic dude accidentally making nuclear bombs in his bedroom lmfao. Luna i thought was obvious for the prompt, she's a zombie catgirl so shes just, parts. bits n pieces. Rosaline, again like Lafayette, i dont have much concrete about her, but being my 1 goddess oc it was pretty obvious she'd be the one i drew for the last day lol
#iko's shit#Oct2022#2022art#don't tag as kin/id/me#OC-tober#fine art#original art#gift art#original character#ocs#ocs:raven#ocs:calypso#ocs:sean#ocs:ruben#ocs:toni#ocs:russula#ocs:wren#ocs:delilah#ocs:jay#ocs:copper#ocs:angel delite#ocs:blaire nightingale#ocs:ginger cake#ocs:richie#ocs:robin#ocs:susie#ocs:buttercup#ocs:felix#WCBF#YM&V
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Can you rec some media with canon queer characters 😌
ofc!! thisll by no means be an exhaustive list but idk what youre looking for specifically so ill break it into categories
my current favs!! if u follow me u know these already lol
the umbrella academy: netflix show abt dysfunctional superpowered siblings reuniting to stop the apocalypse. canon mlm character (pansexual according to his actor) w mlm romance, canon wlw character (lesbian according to someone on the show dont rmr who) w het romance in s1, wlw romance in s2 - this is one of my absolute fav shows at the minute in general its brilliant
the magnus archives: horror podcast abt the head archivist of an institute researching experiences w the supernatural. protagonist is canonically biromantic asexual, in a mlm relationship in s5, and there is another canon bisexual character, as well as (iirc) a canon wlw couple - yall know ive been so into tma lately its so so good, obviously if you dont like horror its not for you but if you do.. 👀
sanders sides: youtube series abt a gay dude working out his emotional problems via personified aspects of his personality. all the characters are gay cuz thas what thomas is baby! - i was hesitant abt putting this cuz thomas is a person not a character lol but if u haven't seen sasi i recommend it its like free therapy but theres songs sometimes
shows!
julie and the phantoms (netflix remake): musical show abt a teen girl rediscovering music after her mothers death w the help of three ghosts who were in a 90s band. canon gay character w a slow burn romance (not yet canon bfs but s2 lets go) - its very cheesy and the musical segments can drag on a bit but its p good overall
lucifer: detective show abt lucifer abandoning his rule of hell to buy a nightclub and beginning to solve murders w the lapd. lucifer is canonically bi/pan, as is his demon pal mazikeen, but queerness rly isnt a focus of the show its more casual rep - that being said its a good show overall, if a little predictable now n then (s1-3 on amazon prime, 4+5 on netflix)
kipo and the age of wonderbeasts: fantasy cartoon set in a future filled w mutant intelligent animals, kipo finds herself lost and has to get home w the help of her friends. canon gay character as one of the mains, canon nb side character - its a rly good cartoon! lots of fun, excellent soundtrack, and the main characters are all poc which is rly nice to see
the dragon prince: cartoon abt two princes and an elf assassin returning a dragon egg to its mother. canon mlm couple, several canon wlw characters, canon nb character - i havent seen the show myself but ive heard very good things abt it!
i am not okay with this: netflix show abt a teen girl discovering she has superpowers and hating it. protag is canon wlw (i THINK shes a lesbian but i havent watched it in a hot sec), developing wlw relationship - ianowt slaps! sad that s2 got cancelled but s1 is real good its a touch spooky and theres a bit of gore/blood so watch out lol
schitt's creek: sitcom abt a rich family who lose all their money and have to move into the motel of a town they bought as a joke. canon pansexual character and canon gay character w one of the sweetest mlm relationships - a rly good witty show w excellent character development for every character!
good omens: show abt a demon and an angel trying to stop the end of the world. every celestial character in it is nonbinary, + crowley and aziraphale have a nonexplicit (ie no on screen pda lol) romance - good omens is such a good queer show none of the characters care abt gender in the slightest lmao, plus the show in general is fantastic (the book is also very good)
movies!
the old guard: a group of immortals fight an organisation that wants to capitalise off their immortality. canon mlm couple - another one i havent seen yet (i will!) but apparently very good
it chapter 2: horror sequel to It, w the main characters returning to derry to defeat pennywise for good. canon gay character in unrequited love - i only say chapter 2 because his queerness isnt referenced at all in the first film, again its big horror and theres no gay romance just gay tragedy but its a good film
love, simon: romcom about a closeted gay teen falling in love w someone over emails. do i even need to state the rep? - honestly if u haven't seen love simon yet what are you even DOING its so good proper fluffy queer romcom, the book (simon vs the homosapiens agenda) is also really good!! so is the sequel (leah on the offbeat) where the protag is a bi girl + it focuses on a wlw romance
the way he looks: brazilian coming of age film abt a blind teen boy falling for the new kid at his school. canon mlm relationship - this doesnt seem to be on (british) netflix anymore so idk where youd find it with subtitles but i rmr liking it a lot!
games!
night in the woods: 2d platformer abt a young woman (well. cat) dropping out of college and coming home to live w her parents + discovering spooky happenings in her hometown. canon mlm couple and i believe the protag is canonically bi? - i will recommend nitw to literally anyone who will listen its one of my all time favourite games, deals w a lot of mental health issues and its absolutely gorgeous w a brilliant soundtrack and rly good dialogue thats witty and serious and realistic (its on steam + switch for sure dk abt other platforms, abt 15 quid i think?)
tell me why: adventure game abt twins returning to their childhood home + findin Secrets. canon trans male character - i havent got around to buying + playing this yet but it looks really good! (its in three chapters + on steam, not sure on price)
other media!
the art of being normal: slice of life novel abt a young trans girl discovering herself. main characters are a trans man and a trans woman. - a good novel! trigger warning for transphobic actions including descriptions of a transphobic attack on the guy, and its certainly not without its faults otherwise, but i thought it was pretty good
the adventure zone: dungeons and dragons podcast by the mcelroy brothers. idk specifics but theres a lot of canon queer characters in it! - i havent listened to taz yet but i know a lot abt it, inc that its good and funny and has plenty of queer rep
theres several more i like that arent listed here but to keep this from getting just ridiculously long ill leave it there :] tried to get a range of genres and medias, hopefully theres something for you in there!
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Trying to semi-organize my thoughts on what exactly I am wanting out of spn fic and hm let's see. If I remember this post in the future, I may update it as I think of/on things and use this for reference so I, also, don't forget lol
Okay so, wants/likes:
Cas prominent. He is my, as I believe the kpop kids say, bias, so he is kind of non-negotiable. Sorry I am just not interested in fics where he is not prominent
Destiel not required but a good plus. Slight preference for intricate courtship rituals over ones where they figure things out ridiculously easy, unless it is established relationship. If the revelation comes too quick and easy then I get taken out of the moment :')
Optional: Angels treating Cas like their baby brother :3 Cas can be somewhat put out by it or not. Actually maybe bonus if he IS, bc they are all angels of the lord and relative by rank and experience, And Yet [whoever] just cannot help but be *points* Baby
canonverse is plus. canon divergence is okay but idk how close to canon I'm looking for, if it's too close to an episode rewrite I may not be into that either
casefics are cool. If it's got that canon-typical vaguely racist sht then pls warn me going in 😔
Found family. Family don't end in blood!!! Spn may forget this but I never will!!!
Any exploration of the whole fucky destiel thematic dichotomies, the whole free will vs destiny shit, stuff like words of prophets are written on subway walls, like.. idk, something that is intricate-rituals-gay and also makes me think of the philosophy of thehuman condition
corollary: slow burns ig?? or like mutual pining? canon typical thinking they are not worthy or that it is something they cannot have? canon typical did not realize until later but even then they have their individual canon-typical reasons for not acting on it, until they do bc it's fic so they can get together for realsies?
trope: Cas and/or Destiel being parents. I read one recently where it was like single dad Cas (to Claire and Jack) and then Dean came (back) into his life recently and I rly liked it
AUs are fine but highly subject to mood so we'll see. I did read a Star Trek-y AU I liked
I'm down for a lot of various other kinds of plot tropes and stuff, tho I want stuff that's more character and plot and less, like, pwp or fuck or die or that kinda thing
trope: curses maybe? I've found a couple curse-focused fics which were interesting
trope: Hurt/Comfort of the Cas whump kind but not necessarily have to be just Cas. But like.. u know when Uriel is beating him up and he looks all bloody and beautiful, or when he flexes his sexy angel powers and transports the Winchesters to the past but then collapses bc he overtaxed himself, or when he had that blanket on when he was suffering from the attack dog spell.... yeah,,,
trope: Anything with like the Winchesters caring about and caring for Cas. I just rly like Cas being taken care of :') pls wrap him in a blanket and pat his shoulder brusque-softly in ur emotionally repressed way Dean
bottom line my emphasis tends to be more on character and plot. I can't do plot without character, the relationships - whether ship or gen - are important to my enjoyment of a fic. I can sit thru a lot if the characters/character dynamics are good and chewy lmao like u can rly sink ur teeth into it
Bonus features:
eldritch horror angels are a bonus. Give me unfathomable trueform angels, I feel like I don't see that enough
wings* but.... caveat I like my spn wings more metaphysical than literal unless they're literal for a point, but this isn't set in stone either. I'm just... slightly tired of the physicality of the wings I guess. Like it's not the physicality that's the issue, ig, but when it's not treated as metaphysical (as well)
wouldn't mind some good endverse fics to chew on altho that might also make me sad
Cas being cute, a la crazy!Cas (who is.... so soft.... his innocence.. *clutches chest*) or like when Cas and Dean went to talk to that police guy and Cas was like you tell them it's angels and demons warring and he will tell you what he knows, or when Cas was like I'm gonna become a hunter :3, or interrogating the cat, or this is his serious face, yes
Powerful af Cas?? I miss season 4/5 Cas, when he was powerful and self-assured and wasn't "mentally deficient puppy" as Metatron meanly put it Cas. I feel like we get less of that as the seasons go on... I miss Cas being powerful and exuding energy that I'm sure is what had ppl assigning him as top energy. Like yes flex ur sexy sexy angel powers pls. There's one ep where my notes just say "ANGEL SMITE ANGEL SMITE / HEAAALING." Season 6 Cas where he is more out of touch with humanity and more brusque was also intriguing even tho he was like that bc of extenuating circumstances. But him flexing his sexy angel powers sure was sexy
Do not wants :(
Endgame human!Cas. Sorry I like short-lived Cassidy am more into feathered Cas than human!Cas. endgame human!Cas just isn't a good solution/happy ending to me, I don't think Cas needs to change to be able to live happily, and also I like to chew on the like philosophical underpinnings of an immortal/mortal pairing if that does get called into question lol
Human AU* but like asterisk bc I will take human AU if the plot is compelling and/or the characterization still manages to capture that je nais se quoi of canonverse. If they are, like, middle age dads being domestic, as an example, tho, then I can probs do that, I just like.. have limited capacity for career-based AUs for the sake of it, if that makes sense... But character/character dynamics trumps all, like I said lmao.. I've sat thru scenarios/setups that lowkey dealt me psychic damage bc of the nature of the set dressing, bc I checked it out out of morbid curiosity but the way they did the characterization ended up working for me
A/B/O - I am not seeking A/B/O at the moment
Hurt no Comfort - it would make me too sad :(
fics that treat angels like literal physical feathered beings. Idk I just like... want the whole angel thing to be treated more metaphysically. They are multidimensional wavelengths of celestial intent in holy corporate/business attire visages but they are still very much multidimensional wavelengths of celestial intent the ballpark size of our Chrysler building. If the wings are treated too literally I find I start getting bored, ironically. This is ironic bc I'm a slut for wingfic. But with spn I find that a conventional kind of wingfic/angel conception where the wings are just limbs with maybe some slight handwaved dimension-shifting stowing is.. slightly passe for my tastes. Unless it's like a forced manifestation or sth. Just like.. get the metaphysics involved, tie it to angelic grace. Something. Make is racy. But not too racy, the whole wings-as-erogenous-zones thing I'm a bit over too, xenobiology to humans would just be biology to these beings, it doesn't make sense to me to be like "oh they have a tail and it's EXTRA sensitive," like are you suggesting your arm/armpit is an extra special species-typical erogenous zone too?
deaging unless it ties to some other kinda plotty deal somehow ig? Like... I got invested in this fandom for them as they are now I'm not too interesting in unseasoned nibling vers
this maybe goes with the human aus tho that's a slight asterisk but hard line no high school aus. pls I cannot take the psychic damage that would deal to me personal
I have no conclusion even tho I feel like I need one. here's wonderwall? ig I can stumble around looking for reclists and see if anything sticks out, trawling thru tags so far has been a mixed bag
Anyway haha lol, stand-up-style-tone I mean I'm not asking for a lot amirite. Just a nebulously specific set of intricate rituals wrapped around a plot and also found family or something, like you know, just a trifling
#supernatural cw#I had a tag for things like this before maybe#idk what#personal reference#hope I remember that in the future lmao...#long post
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No Through Road
Title: No Through Road (part eight of the ‘Buried Secrets’ series) Summary: When a new hunt crops up, you and the boys decide to put your feelings aside and prioritise the case. If only it were that simple... Pairing: Dean x Reader, Sam x Reader Warnings: pining, angst, light swearing, canon-typical violence Word Count: 6,000ish (whoops)
note; merry christmas/happy holidays!!! i’m so sorry!! for the lack of updates !!!!! it’s been killing me too i swear!!!
while writing this i got rly deep into threads debating whether the impala is an automatic or a manual (it’s an automatic btw), just a fun fact. enjoy!
Buried Secrets Masterlist | Main Masterlist
“Y/N - I wasn’t aware that you were home.”
Castiel’s voice dragged your attention away from the book in your lap, and you glanced up in surprise to see the angel in the doorway, throwing you a surprised smile that you hadn’t realised you’d missed during your time away.
“Hey, Cas. Yeah, I’m back,” you replied, offering a weak smile in return.
“I take it Dean has apologised?” Cas said sternly, his boots thudding on the timber floor as he stepped into your room. Sighing, you closed the book, tossing it to the side as you nodded glumly.
“Yeah, he has,” you informed him. “Things are… hopefully on their way back to normal.”
Cas beamed. “That’s wonderful,” he said sincerely, but his smile faltered as he recognised the despair etched into your features. He glanced to your bed, eyes darting to yours questioningly, and you nodded. He took a seat next to you. “You don’t seem pleased,” he observed, and you offered a weak smile.
“Things are complicated,” you mumbled, and Castiel’s wide eyes found yours, imploring you to continue. You leaned back against the bedrest, eyes dancing around the room as though, if you looked hard enough, you’d find the answers you so desperately sought hiding under the desk, or in the closet. But alas, the words you needed were nowhere to be found, and so you let your lips spill what they may.
“Before I left… Dean and I had a thing,” you began. “Like… romantically.” Cas nodded.
“Yes, he mentioned that while you were gone,” he affirmed, and you raised an eyebrow in interest.
“He talked to you about me?”
“Yes, of course,” Cas said, as though it were the most obvious thing in the world. “On several occasions, in fact. He was very upset - mostly about hurting you, I believe.”
It took a few moments for this new information to settle, but once it did, you put it aside to dwell on later. “Oh,” you said. “Well, when I left, Sam and I kind of… developed a thing as well,” you said slowly. “But I hadn’t sorted things out with Dean yet, and now… now I honestly don’t know what the hell I’m meant to do. I feel like I’ve hit a dead end - like I’m trapped. I could never be with Sam if I don’t get closure with Dean, but if I get closure with Dean, I don’t know where that would leave Sam and I. I just- I’ve hit a wall,” you grumbled. Cas frowned, observing you thoughtfully as he mulled over your words.
“Who do you want to be with?” he asked, and you sighed loudly.
“I don’t know, Cas, that’s the thing. A part of me thinks I should choose Sam, because he was there for me, y’know? He was so sweet, and- and I felt safe with him,” you said. “He’s practically the perfect guy.”
“Then there’s your answer,” Cas said, and you sighed, shaking your head.
“But Dean… Look, he has some shit to make up for, that’s for sure, but… I feel so drawn to him. Being with Dean, it just feels… right. Like… almost like we’re two sides of the same coin, y’know?”
Cas frowned.
“Oh. Well, that is a bit more complex,” he allowed. “But it seems to me, you already know what you want,” he added, and you bolted upright.
“And what’s that?” you asked. Cas hesitated, and you cast him a pleading expression. “C’mon, man, I’ll take any advice I can get.”
“Well-”
But before he could finish his sentence, Dean was at your door, laptop in hand as he rapped his knuckles against the doorframe. Castiel fell silent, whatever answers he might have bestowed fading out of your reach - at least for the moment.
“Hey, Y/N, we’ve got a case- oh, hi, Cas,” he greeted in surprise. You sighed.
“Raincheck?” you murmured to Cas, who nodded warmly. You walked to Dean, peering over his shoulder and frowning at the computer screen. “What are we looking at?” you asked. You were stood close enough to him that your chin was all but resting on his shoulder, and the warmth of his body next to yours sent a pleasant tingle of electricity down your spine that you forced yourself to ignore. Dean tensed at the slight brush of your body over his, taking half a step forward as he cleared his throat.
“Uh, three victims in the past month - corpses looked like they’d been ‘ravaged by an animal’, all missing hearts,” he said. You mulled over the information.
“Okay, what, we’re thinking a werewolf?” you checked, and Dean nodded.
“Seems like.”
“How far?”
“‘Bout three hours.”
“Great, I’ll be ready in ten minutes,” you said decisively. Dean’s eyes met yours and held your gaze a moment longer than necessary before he nodded, ducking his head and leaving the room. When you turned back to start packing, Cas shot you a pointed look that you couldn’t quite deconstruct with the scent of Dean still in your nostrils, the phantom warmth of his body still grazing over your own - you couldn’t get your own thoughts straight, let alone try to decipher someone else’s.
“What?” you challenged, and he shook his head, a small smile on his face.
“Nothing,” he said softly. “Be safe,” he told you, resting his hand on your shoulder for a moment as you nodded.
“Thanks,” you replied, and you finally managed to untangle your thoughts enough to recall the conversation the two of you had shared.
“Hey, wait, what were you gonna say befo-” you began, but when you span around, the angel was already gone.
---
“So the next victim will either be Sara Aplin or Barry Smith, if we’re right about the co-workers thing,” you mused, exchanging glances with Sam and Dean. The motel room was cramped with the three of you, each bed littered with papers and research whilst the walls were adorned with a myriad of pins and criss-crossing red string. Your gut had been right about the werewolf - you’d narrowed it down to a twenty-seven year old male, Marshall Cooper, who’d had several public disagreements with his co-workers who all turned up dead only a few days later, minus their hearts. He’d had two such rows in the past few days - one with a girl, Sara, who was barely pushing twenty-five, and another with twenty-nine year old Barry.
“Looks like it,” Sam remarked, licking his finger as he leafed through a pile of pages in his hand.
“Great, well at least it’s fifty-fifty,” you muttered, pinning both locations on the map you had stuck to the wall - they were on opposite ends of town. “It’d be handy if they were neighbours - three of us could stake ‘em out together. Why are things never easy?” you moaned, and Sam chuckled.
“Tell me about it,” he replied. You stared at the map a moment longer, smirking as you trailed your finger over the glossy paper.
“Hey, I might’ve found a shortcut between the houses,” you mused, and Dean raised an eyebrow as Sam snorted.
“No offense, Y/N, I’m not taking your directional advice. Remember what happened last time you thought you found a ‘shortcut’?” Sam teased, and you giggled at the memory.
“Yeah, pretty sure a branch hit you in the face - you shoulda seen yourself, you looked so shocked,” you laughed, exchanging knowing grins with the youngest Winchester as you elbowed him fondly. He shook his head, smile lingering on his lips as your skin brushed over his. He pressed closer to you, holding contact a moment longer than he should have.
“Yeah, I’ll bet,” he chuckled, shaking his head to himself as he watched you fondly, a sweet smile tilting the corners of his lips.
Dean stood, unable to tear his eyes from you as Sam brushed up against you, both of you so casually comfortable in one another’s presence as you rattled off inside jokes he could never hope to be a part of. Just how much had you and his brother shared during your time away? How could he ever compete with the easy conversation and affectionate gestures the two of you so readily exchanged? Maybe he should just give up - maybe he’d forced any hope of a relationship between you towards a dead end the moment he’d sent you packing. Maybe there was no coming back from this one.
Dean grimaced, forcing the thoughts away as his green eyes wandered over the faded newspaper clippings pinned to the walls.
“And if we’ve got the pattern right, he’ll strike tonight,” he interrupted. You and Sam mellowed, stepping apart and falling back into business mode as Dean took on the authoritative role. “Alright, Y/N and I will stake out Sara’s house, you handle Barry’s. We good?” Dean checked. Sam glanced to you, eyes questioning, and you cast him a reassuring smile.
“Yeah. Sounds good,” you replied firmly, and you saw Dean throw you a tentative half smile as his eyes met yours. He held your gaze for a moment before it quickly flickered away. The moment, however brief, held a level of intimacy that half-frightened you, but simultaneously sent a warm kaleidoscope of butterflies dancing in your stomach. Though intense, the feeling was familiar - and for a moment, things were almost back to normal.
You were jolted back to reality when Sam cleared his throat, the magic of the moment dissipating as the gravity of your situation crashed back down on you, an anvil weighing heavily on your shoulders. When you looked at the tall Winchester, his eyes betrayed a hint of jealousy that he quickly hid behind a smile.
“Alright. You’re sure you wanna go with Dean, Y/N?” he checked. “I mean, we’ll probably be waiting awhile.” You nodded.
“Yeah - Dean and I probably have some catching up to do, anyways,” you conceded, casting Dean a half smile that brought a grin to his face.
“Besides, we’re practically the hunting dream team - no offense, Sammy,” he said with a chuckle, and you shook your head in amused exasperation.
“It’s Sam,” the younger Winchester corrected with a roll of his eyes. You ignored their bickering, glancing out the cramped motel window to see dusk rapidly descending over the small farming town.
“We should get going,” you interjected, snatching Baby’s keys from where they sat on the bed. You jingled them tauntingly. “I’m driving,” you added with a wink. Dean’s cocky grin dropped quicker than a bag of stones into water.
“Oh, hell no,” he objected, but you shot him a smirk, tucking your gun into your waistband as you left the motel, tossing an amused Sam a wave over your shoulder. Dean hastily followed, lunging for the keys that you quickly protected in your closed fist.
“Sorry, Dean!” you teased in a sing-song tone, and the eldest Winchester pouted.
“C’mon, Y/N! You always ride the curb!” he all but whined, and you grinned.
“Shoulda thought of that earlier, slowpoke,” you shot back, and though he rolled his eyes, there was no malice in his act.
“I’m so sorry, Baby,” he whispered, patting the roof once before slipping into the passenger seat. You cranked the engine the moment the door clicked shut, pulling out from the motel parking lot and merging onto the main road as the passing scenery faded into a vague green blur.
“Hunting dream team, huh?” you remarked, and Dean shrugged, smiling wolfishly.
“Yeah, you know we work well together. Remember that wendigo case a couple years back?” he prompted, and you laughed.
“The one in Minnesota? When Sam had the flu, and we went in totally unprepared?”
“Yeah,” he said, face falling a little at the mention of Sam’s name. He brightened as he continued. “We mighta been unprepared, but we found that damn thing’s hideout in record time. Ganked that son of a bitch before it knew what hit it,” he reminded you, and you raised an inquisitive eyebrow.
“Really? I seem to remember you ‘finding the hideout’ by literally falling over into the cave, being attacked, and then I had to come save your ass,” you responded, and Dean shrugged.
“Potato, potahto… got it done, didn’t we?”
You smiled. “Yeah, we did. I guess you’re right… we are pretty awesome,” you said, winking at him and feeling a knot of butterflies rise in your stomach at his resounding chuckle.
“Yeah, we are,” he said, his eyes lingering on the smile curving your lips when you glanced back to the road. A comfortable silence settled over the car, and you felt your neck prickled as his gaze didn’t leave you. When you glanced over at him, of course, he jostled himself away from you, eyes glued a little too intently on his phone.
“Whatcha doing?” you asked, and his eyes darted over to you in surprise.
“Uh- looking at directions,” he stammered. You glanced at his phone screen - blank.
“Right. Well, google maps is for losers who can’t read street signs,” you said firmly, and Dean rolled his eyes good naturedly.
“Ha, ha,” he said dryly, tucking his phone into the pocket of his jeans. The Winchester settled back into the passenger seat, folding his arms behind his head. “Fine then, I won’t tell you the street,” he said stubbornly. “I’ll bet ya five bucks that you’ll miss it.”
You snickered. “You’re on,” you replied. A few minutes later a smug grin was etched over Dean’s face, and you shot him a hard look.
“What?” you demanded, and he chuckled, holding up his hands in mock surrender.
“Nothing, nothing…”
“This is the right way!” you insisted, nodding to the road before you. Sure, it looked a little unfamiliar, but that was just because it wasn’t broad daylight, unlike your last visit to the house… right? Dean forced a straight face.
“Sure, this is the right way…” he allowed, before sniggering. “If you’re looking for a dead end,” he tacked on, nodding to the ‘No Through Road’ sign glinting in the fading light. You released a guttural noise of irritation - yet another dead end. You seemed to be hitting a lot of those lately. Dean released the laugh he’d been biting back.
“Good try, sweetheart. Street was two blocks back,” he said, and you scrunched your nose up at him.
“Thanks, Alexa,” you snapped back, though you couldn’t restrain the grin that split your face when you threw the car into a three-point-turn, “accidentally” reversing straight into the gutter. Dean’s mouth fell open in horror, and you feigned innocence.
“Oops!” you cried dramatically, tone ringing with exaggeration. “Sorry, Baby… this never would’ve happened if someone had told me when the turnoff was…” you continued, stroking the steering wheel and shooting Dean a sweet smile.
“Very funny,” he replied, his annoyed expression quickly melting into one of bemusement as his lips spread into a nostalgic smile. “Hey, remember that case with-”
“-the haunted maserati?” you finished easily, and he nodded, whistling.
“We really totalled it, didn’t we? Damn shame, too, did you hear her engine? Never heard a thing run smoother,” he remarked wistfully, and you bit back a laugh.
“Careful, Dean, Baby will hear you,” you taunted, swinging into the side street that Dean pointed out. “Shame that Sam missed that one, too. Where was he again?” you asked, brow furrowing as you thought back to the long-forgotten hunt. You saw Dean swallow at the mention of his name, and his wistful smile collapsed into a solemn expression as he tensed his jaw.
“Still dealing with that fractured ankle, wasn’t he?” he asked gruffly, and you nodded as the penny dropped.
“Oh, yeah, poor guy,” you tutted, and Dean grunted in agreement, busying himself with scanning the houses dotted evenly along the street.
“This one, right here,” he said suddenly, pointing to a nondescript white house with a garden that needed a little more love than it was receiving. Large bushes obscured much of the lawn, the shrubbery casting shadows that swiftly lengthened as the sun continued to dip below the horizon. You pulled in close to the curb, throwing the car into park and flipping off the engine.
“Well, now we wait, huh?” you remarked, glancing over at Dean. He sighed, nodding as his eyes fell to meet yours. He held your gaze for a moment longer than he ought to, and you couldn’t help but notice the flecks of amber embedded amongst the green of his irises, smouldering like tiny embers in the fading light. The orange sunset glowed on his skin, though dappled shadows danced over his face as the leafy trees overhanging the house swayed in the light breeze. Dean tried a small, crooked smile - just a curve of his full lips, there one moment and gone the next. You released a shaky breath as you flashed a smile in return. Dean tore away his stare, turning stiffly to observe the house once more. He cleared his throat.
“Yeah. Now we wait.”
---
Dean was bored.
The moment the Impala’s engine had cut out, the two of you fell into a semi-comfortable silence broken only by the rustle of leaves in the wind and the steady beat of rain on the roof. The occasional stutter of a motor and the splashing of wheels across puddles pierced the quiet as cars rolled down the street, headlights beaming over the slick black tarmac. He’d busied himself at first by studying the leafy garden plants, before turning his gaze to the peeling white paint of the crumbling fence, counting each stripe of brown wood flickering between streaks of yellowing pigment. But as darkness descended the scenery fell into an indistinguishable grey blur, and Dean could no longer pick a distraction from the outside world.
He shifted in his seat, wincing at the stiffness of his legs. You glanced over at the sound of movement, raising an eyebrow at his evident discomfort. He flashed a sheepish smile, swallowing the lump in his throat spurred on by the glint of your eyes in the dim lighting, the warmth of your body so close to his in the cramped confines of his car.
“You got the time?” he asked weakly. You glanced at your phone.
“Nearly midnight,” you informed him, and he nodded slowly.
“Right. Great. Maybe this thing’ll end up on Sam’s end,” he mused, and you shrugged.
“Yeah, maybe - he hasn’t had anything on his end yet, either, though,” you replied offhandedly, turning back to your phone.
“Oh? You’ve- you’ve been talking to him, then?”
“Just a text here and there,” you said, smiling tightly as you nodded to the phone in your hand. Dean nodded slowly.
“Right. Of course. Good,” he said. Silence once again fell over the vehicle, and having come to a dead end as to alleviating his boredom, Dean spared another glance your way. His breath fell into an uneven patter as he admired the slanting of the low light over your cheek, illuminating the gentle flush of your skin, the gentle parting of your lips as you read something on the screen before you. When a small smile stretched over your lips as you read something amusing, Dean couldn’t help but mirror it as he found himself imagining being bestowed the honour of putting that smile on your face himsel-
You looked over at him, and Dean hastily flicked his eyes back to the house, shaking away the languishing thoughts that tormented his mind and ignoring the pit of yearning that burned in his stomach. You deserved far more than what he could give you. Although he would always be the first to admit such, it didn’t stop the pang of pain that hit his chest at the thought. He busied his mind with other ponderings.
“Hey, I… I don’t think I ever thanked you,” he said eventually, voice stammering and breathy with nerves. He pulled apart his twiddling thumbs, moving to grip the steering wheel with white knuckles. That seemed to surprise you - your eyebrows darted upwards as you shot him a questioning expression.
“For what?”
Dean shifted uncomfortably. “For- for trying to help me. With the hex bag, I mean. It… you didn’t have to do that.”
“Yeah, you made that pretty clear,” you chuckled dryly, and Dean swallowed thickly as his yearning was overridden by guilt.
“I just mean… I appreciate the thought, is all,” he mumbled. “I shouldn’t have blown up at you about it, I just… I’m used to dealing with that stuff on my own. It’s… easier that way.” He refused to meet your eyes, his jaw tight as he fixed his gaze on the empty road before him. You half smiled.
“I’ve noticed. Y’know, it’s okay to reach out when you need to. You’d be amazed how much easier it is to deal with things when you have someone to vent to,” you prodded, giving him a playful nudge with your elbow. He chuckled.
“I’ll keep that in mind for next time,” he replied. You lifted an inquiring eyebrow, and his smile melted into a somber line. He swallowed, biting back a smirk, a joke, anything to deflect his inner turmoil, and instead allowed his eyes to find your own. “I will. Promise.”
You nodded, seemingly satisfied with his answer as you patted his knee once. The thoughtful action stoked the slow burning longing in his chest, but the comfort and safety your touch brought was gone as quickly as it came as you folded your arms into your chest and adjusted in your seat. Dean felt the cold air creep over the empty space you had occupied, the chill sinking into the hollowness in his heart, squeezing it in an icy grasp. He took a shaky breath, his clenched fist falling over the place your hand had occupied. Neither of you spoke.
“Hey, what day is it?” you asked suddenly, and Dean shot you a perplexed look.
“Uh, Monday, I think,” he said. “What, you got an appointment or something?”
You smirked. “No, just thought it’s fitting that we’re hunting a werewolf today.”
Dean furrowed his brow. “Why?”
You shot him a wolfish grin. “It’s Moon-day, Dean.”
The eldest Winchester closed his eyes, tongue in cheek as he fought back a laugh. “Y/N, that was pathetic.”
“Don’t you mean pack-hetic?” you challenged cheekily, and Dean snorted.
“C’mon, though, really? Moon-day? You could’ve at least somehow slipped Howl-a-ween in there, instead,” he shot back, and you smirked.
“Oh, I know, I just wanted to see you in pain at my terrible puns,” you said. Dean rolled his eyes fondly.
“At least you’re a-were that they’re bad,” he replied offhandedly, and you groaned, though you seemed unable to keep the grin off your face.
“Okay, truce,” you said. “I’m out of puns.”
“That’s okay, sweetheart, we can just hit paws on it for now.” He threw you a wink, and you chortled. Dean grinned at your laughter - carefree and genuine, woven with snorts that you futilely tried to disguise with a cough. The so-called ‘ugly’ laughter was music to his ears, a score perfectly composed by the delightful ringing of your voice. He couldn’t name a single melody he favoured over that which was your joy, a noise so pure it had him giddy on the idea that he was the lucky man who had invoked it.
Dean’s own laughter died as he recalled your similar exchange with Sam only hours prior, and he was crushed with the reminder that he wasn’t the only one with whom you had shared such buoyant moments. The cold heaviness crushed him again, and it was all he could do to force a tight half-smile in response to your wide grin. You didn’t seem to notice his dejection, however, as your eyes focussed on something over his shoulder.
“Well, I think our werewolf just turned into a there-wolf,” you remarked softly, cocking your gun and nodding towards the subtle movement in the darkness outside, followed by the rustling of the bushes. Dean snapped into solemnity, twisting around to squint into the darkness. Sure enough, you were right.
“Alright, follow my lead,” he whispered, loading his pistol with a round of silver bullets as he slowly creaked open the door of the Impala and let his boots crunch onto the footpath. You slipped out behind him, letting the door hang silently open as you readied your gun and crept into the overgrown garden. Ankle height grass brushed over Dean’s jeans, leaving tiny seeds clinging to the stiff fabric. He paid them no heed, every last drop of his attention focussed solely on the hunt as he kept downwind of the crouched wolf. He watched as you took position by it’s flank, exchanging nods as he carefully aimed - if all went well, one shot would end this hunt.
But then, when did things ever go well for Dean Winchester?
He cursed as he stepped on a twig, of all things, the thin brown stick hidden in the grass that couldn’t muffle the snap as it splintered under his heavy boot. The wolf shot around, snarling, it’s yellow eyes reflecting thin shards of light as it leapt towards him.
Dean shot - once, twice, three times, before the heavy body landed atop him, screeching and howling, it’s writhing claws digging into his arms before it finally slackened, weighing heavily on his chest. The gun flew from his hand, settling in the grass a few feet away, and he groaned as he shoved the body away.
“Shit, are you okay?” you demanded, eyes branded with concern as you rushed over to help him to his feet. Dean nodded, wincing at his wounds but forcing a steely mask over his face - he’d had worse.
“Yeah, fine,” he grunted, hissing as you slipped off your jacket and held it against his wounded shoulder. He had half a mind to push you away, insist that he was fine, but something about the tenderness of your touch and the gentleness in your eyes had him putty in your hands. For once, Dean let himself relax into your warmth, the tension seeping from his muscles as you rested a hand on his chest and began to guide him back from the car. Your phone buzzed in your pocket, but neither of you had mind to mention it - you let it ring out.
The two of you had almost made it through the gate when the other werewolf attacked.
It sprung up from behind, it’s body concealed amongst the large bushes so conveniently dotted around the yard. You felt it’s hot, reeking breath on the back of your neck as it slammed into you, dislodging Dean from your grip and sending him stumbling, dooming him only to watch with wide, helpless eyes as its claws dug into your side.
Dean’s hand shot for his gun only to grasp at empty air, and he felt his chest constrict in panic as you struggled against the wolf, unable to free your arms to defend yourself as it’s snapping jaws inched closer to your face. There was only one thing he could do.
“Hey, Fido!” he bellowed. The wolf hesitated, glancing up with a growl as it’s eyes locked on Dean. “Yeah, you fugly bitch! Come on - want a piece of this?” he roared, throwing open his arms despite the screaming in his shoulder. The wolf leapt at him, and Dean barked a curse as he threw himself to the side, a bush breaking his fall, the sharp twigs digging through his clothes as he rolled to the ground. He scrambled through the grass, catching sight of the glint of his gun a few feet away. The wolf was hot on his tail - he wasn’t going to make it, he realised. Shit - this was it…
That was when he heard a heavy thud and whimper as the wolf was slammed against a tree. Dean risked a glance, pausing with wide eyes and mouth half open as he saw you kneeling with your arms outstretched, pinning the wolf against the trunk with your magic. Your face was glistening with blood and sweat, hair matted and strewn with leaves after your tussle, but he’d be damned if it wasn’t the beautiful sight he’d ever had the pleasure of witnessing.
“Get the gun, idiot!” you snapped, visibly straining as you struggled to keep the wolf contained. Dean nodded, snapping back to the task at hand and quickly retrieving the gun, emptying the round of silver bullets into the wolf’s chest. It yowled and twitched, but finally stilled. You released a sharp breath as you let your arms fall, the wolf mirroring them as it thumped to the floor.
Dean sprinted to you, collapsing to his knees beside you as he frantically scanned your weary body for wounds. “Dammit, Y/N, are you okay?” he demanded, and you chuckled dryly as you nodded.
“Yeah, just some scrapes and bruises, same as you,” you muttered, wincing and pressing your hand against your blood-slickened side. Dean didn’t relax until he had examined your injuries firsthand, but once he realised you really were fine, he found himself frozen with his hands on your hips and your heaving chest only centimetres from his own. Your eyes met his, wide and sparkling and breathless from the fight, and maybe it was the adrenaline or the fact that you had both almost died, but Dean couldn’t stop himself from crushing his mouth to yours.
He could taste the salt of your sweat tinged with the metal of your blood as your lips met in a bruising kiss, his hands instinctively pulling you closer as you melted against him. Your hands were in his hair, scraping delectably against the nape of his neck as he poured every drop of passionate relief into the rough motion of his chapped lips over your own. His tongue found yours, hot and desperate as his arms caged around you, clutching you to his chest as though you’d never be safe anyplace else…
...and then he was pulling away with a start, detangling his limbs from your own as he guiltily ducked his head and cleared his throat. He didn’t meet your eyes, only allowed himself a sharp exhale as he pushed to his feet, eyes scanning his surroundings for any other threat as he silently berated himself for losing control in the way that he had.
You didn’t speak either, only huffed as the sound of your ringtone pierced the air once more. His gaze finally found yours as you tugged out your phone, and you offered him a tight smile as you held it to your ear.
“Sam?”
The single syllable sent Dean’s stomach plummeting. What was he thinking, kissing you like that? What the hell was he doing? He’d seen the way you’d looked at Sam - the jokes, the coy smiles and flirty banter. He didn’t stand a chance - and yet there he’d gone, kissing you like there was no tomorrow, like none of the past week had ever happened.
God, what kind of a hole had he dug himself into now?
---
Your mind was still reeling from Dean’s kiss - it had been all too easy to lean into it, to lose yourself in the pressure of his lips, the heat of his skin as he held you like he’d never again have the honour. Your skin still burned from his touch, your lips still buzzed from the taste of him - he’d consumed all your senses, his presence wrapping itself around you even though the only thing against your skin now was the cold night air.
Your phone rang, and you snapped from your trance as you pulled it out with shaking hands and accepted the call, eyes skimming blindly over the ID as your thoughts were drenched with the press of Dean’s body over yours, so passionate and warm, but so right.
Dean’s eyes finally met yours, and the guilt so deeply set into his expression had your brow creasing in confusion as you sent him a tentative smile that he didn’t return. Did he… regret it?
“Y/N!” a breathless exclamation sounded on the other line. You blinked, flipping back to reality as you registered the owner of the voice.
“Sam?” you gasped.
“Yeah! Listen, I think there are two wolves - I can’t believe I didn’t see it before! I’ve been reading over the case, and Marshall had a roommate who seemed a little too closely involved in-”
“Yeah, we know,” you replied dryly, shaking your head once to clear yourself from the lingering traces of Dean’s affection. “We-uh- we got it. Them. Both of the- look, both werewolves are dead,” you stammered eventually, and you heard a sigh of relief on Sam’s end.
“Great - are you okay?” he asked, voice heavy with worry.
“Fine,” you managed. “We’re both fine. Bit worse for wear, but fine.”
“Okay - okay, well, good. Let’s meet back at the motel, then.”
“Yeah - get the first aid kit ready if you beat us there,” you replied tiredly.
“Yeah, of course. See you soon,” Sam bid, and you sighed, tucking away your phone as he hung up. You glanced up at Dean, who was stubbornly avoiding your stare.
“It was Sam,” you told him, trying to coax his eyes back to you. They flashed to yours for a brief moment but left just as quickly. Dean grunted.
“Yeah? What’d he say?”
“Just that there were two wolves.”
Dean snorted. “Better late than never, I guess,” he muttered, and you allowed a short laugh as you both limped back to the Impala, sliding into the seats and nursing your tender wounds as the adrenaline faded from your systems.
“Yep. Turns out Marshall had a roommate. Two man pack. Guess you could say he was a werewolf in sheep’s clothing,” you said cheekily. That pried a smile from the eldest Winchester, finally brought a hint of a gleam back to his green eyes.
“Good one,” he chuckled, cranking the engine and pulling away from the curb. You half-opened your mouth, ready to approach the subject of the adrenaline induced act you had shared, but the look in Dean’s eyes had you second-guessing yourself. His jaw was tense, his fists tenser as he gripped the steering wheel with white knuckles.
He regrets it, you realised, feeling your heart sink as you released a sharp breath.
“Right,” you said eventually. “Let’s get patched up and get the hell outta this town, huh? I bet the cops’ll be here any second, after those gunshots,” you mused. Dean squeezed the wheel tighter.
“Right,” he said tersely, relaxing slightly as you leaned back into the seat and rested your head against the glass of the window. The car was stiff with tension that slowly dissolved as the scenery shifted and blurred outside, and you winced at the throbbing headache that had flared up behind your eyes. Of course your short reprieve from it had been too good to last - how fitting that it should spring up alongside the aching in your chest as you recalled the heat of Dean’s mouth on yours, and the downcast guilt etched into his expression afterwards.
You couldn’t erase the kiss from your mind - couldn’t forget his touch, his scent, his… everything. And it was then that you realised;
You hadn’t reached a dead end, not at all - just the opposite. You’d found a fork in the road, a crossroads, and now you were faced with a glaring choice.
Two paths, each just as tempting as the other - and now you had to do the impossible. For their sakes, for your own sake…
You had to decide.
__________
Part 9 coming soon !!!!!
Buried Secrets tags: @clarinette07 @demonsofhunting @carryon-doctor-lock @coupleofgoons @colie87 @non-exclusive-trash @txnii-hxrdyy @spaghettiwoes @supersouthy @bee-happy-buzz-on @lolmkaythen @defenderrosetyler @sammykb1994 @cocklesbelli @the-fictionwriters-hairdo @witch-of-letters @lilasundari @aquaastrid @deathofmissjackson @officialmarvelwhore @imdoingathingmom @thebookisbtr @sideblogsmutting @keepcalm-and-beyou @stormnightsong @spopovich
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Dean tags: @polina-93 @justagirlinafandomworld @justanotherwinchester @shadowkat-83 @teenwaywardasgardian
Sam tags: @sammys-dimpless
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#supernatural#supernatural imagine#supernatural fanfiction#dean winchester#sam winchester#dean winchester x reader#sam winchester x reader#supernatural x reader#spn#dean winchester fanfiction#sam winchester fanfiction#dean winchester imagine#sam winchester imagine#spn imagine#spn fanfiction#buried secrets series
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HI HOW DO YOU WRITE CHARACTERS
hewwo! i can answer this! im literally gonna do a quick list of both deh and bmc characters for u under this readmore! :D
im gonna start with deh because smaller cast!
evan:
isn’t so much stuttery as he tends to repeat things and uh stammer a bit here and there. stutters over his words sometimes but it’s more l-like this and uh, like… like this
evan hansen has anxiety. he is not anxiety. evan hansen fucks up and makes mistakes and probably internalizes a lot of things. very polite when in public but he can be a bit snappy (as seen w evans comment abt how zoe’s parents have never been poor i believe? it was something he said to zoe)
soft spoken, most of the time. probably not the kind of guy to vocally ask for things until he’s at a comfortable enough point that he feels like he’s not bothering you (same buddy)
i see evan as someone who gets frustrated with himself easily. not as a sense of “god i wish i were normal” but more of a “i should be able to do this, why cant i do this, i want to do this but i cant” because sometimes it’s just a matter of i literally cant do this and i dont know why? and god its so frustrating sometimes
jared:
jared kleinman is a fucking asshole and he knows it. very sarcastic and uses it to cover up his own insecurities, probably the kind of dude who laughs in your face when you tell him off when internally he’s just OH FUCK OH SHIT FUCK FUCK FUCK
a lot of ppl write jared as being insecure abt his weight and tbh i don’t see that being a problem for him? i see jared as being insecure abt the fact he comes off very snarky and assholeish but he turns it around and tries to own it even though… that’s not something you want to be proud of? and he knows that
not the kind of dude who stops to assess his feelings. he powers through shit and insists he’s okay until he’s out of steam. i think it was psy who said he’s a “needs therapy boi” and tbh she’s right?
can be very passive aggressive imo it’s something he really needs to work on.
arrogant, sarcastic, and just a big fucking dick who needs to learn how to watch his mouth.
zoe:
not an pure baby angel, by any means. we’re at a disadvantage because we only see zoe when she’s sort of grieving (because grief can and will come in different ways, and while i see her as not missing connor, i do think that her pushing away her feelings is a form of her grieving imo? it’s a weird thing to explain but there’s a part of zoe that does miss (the old) connor’s presence as w the fake emails evan “gave her her brother back” (albeit a very fake version of connor) and sort of standoffish when it comes to the subject of connor
a bit of an ambivert. extremely outgoing when she’s around her friends or when it comes to music and other things she loves.
very individualistic! her style tends to have doodles on her clothes, she dyes her hair a lot, she probably would be the kind of person to make her own jewelry!
very sweet. the castng call for zoe describes her as being the kind of person who learns the names of the kids who sit alone at lunch and thats she goes out of her way to be nice to people since. connor. yeah.
thats all ive got for zoe but u can always send questions in and i can say yes or no after i ask my pals too
alana:
smart gal! valedictorian! president! i love her! tends to overshare a bit. anxiety + depression gal.
probably into gardening tbh? i can see alana having succulents in her room and maybe a dog that just chills with her.
dont be afraid to make alana mouthy. alana is someone whos extremely headstrong in her actions imo and does what she believes is right, even if others dont believe that. like… think about the fact that she literally published what was believed to be connor’s suicide note because she thought it’d get them the last bit of help they needed for the orchard. it literally fucked the murphys over - but she never considered that?
very much an extrovert. just really wants to belong, man. very optimistic on the surface but i can see her being a little less so underneath. she looks on the bright side because if she doesnt, she doesnt know who will and idk i dont think alana’s the kind of person who just... lets that risk be there.
connor:
we dont kno much abt connor in canon but uhhh…. i can see connor as being a loner, sort of aggressive by accident (tbh this dude’s probably used to people being a dick to him so he’s just sorta standoffish in response) but like… whenever i write connor i usually write him as getting better? he’s gotten the help he needs and he’s doin better
artsy depressed dude. poetry, painting, ect - whatever u want tbh. i just see connor, with help, finding himself in art or something creative (theatre and music included! u do u!)
very much a reader. this dude both has a lot of books on his bookshelf and a lot more books he hasnt fucking read because hes terrible at reading new books. (i personally hc he loves all of poe’s work)
to sorta sum connor up: bold, but not outgoing. caring, but not obvious with it (once he gets help btw). easily angered but sometimes he just doesn’t fucking know why and that frustrates him further. troubled.
honestly if u want to see one of my fave connors - check out @ask-sincerely-memes! i rly love how they portray all three of the boys, but connor is by far my favorite! (mod con and/or mod ev if u read this i love u)
OK ONTO THE BMC FUCKERS if you want to kno abt the adults for either show then feel free to ask
jeremy:
anxiety boy, but not evan hansen level of anxiety. more just… self deprecating, not super confident in himself, probably underestimates himself a lot.
jeremys hard to explain sometimes because a lot of his actions and dialogue comes naturally since i can actually relate to jeremy a lot, personality-wise? a really good fact to throw out there is i don’t think jeremy’s the kind of guy who just goes for stuff sometimes. he has to sorta be hyped up by others imo. michael motivated him to sign up for the play, rich and michael both played parts in getting him squipped (michael in the aspect of “lets check this out and see if its legit” bc i doubt jeremy would have genuinely done that on his own).
which really means jeremy isnt the kind of guy to just… confess things, unless it’s built up enough (i.e. jeremys confrontation w reader in unlonely since it was a conversation he’d been thinking about for a bit). in canon, he didnt really… confess to christine without the help of alcohol (at the halloween party) or without other people building him up (voices in my head).
im literally rereading jeremy fics rn because im trying to come up with a good way of describing him
extremely horny teenage boy. hormones suck. for anyone who writes nsfw: i dont see jeremy being incredibly kinky and sexual and dominant (god forbid) his first fucking time having sex. especially if its both him and the readers first time. sex can be clumsy. you can laugh during sex. but also sex smells. like… once you’ve smelled it, you fucking know it - its just a weird combo of sweat and bodily fluids.
that last part was just a PSA for ppl.
lightweight boy. a lot bolder when drunk. thank you.
honestly if u have any questions abt jeremy, i can try to answer them more specifically but this is as general as i can get.
michael
not an uwu anxious depressed innocent baby boy uwu. remember that michael literally withheld the mtn dew red from jeremy because he wanted an apology. remember that michael wouldnt have been squipped because michael had been completely comfortable with who he is. michael likes his place. he doesn’t want to be cool and popular - he likes who he is. michael in the bathroom was a peak moment of michael finally letting go of emotions he’d been withholding - jeremy calling him a “loser” was the final straw that broke him. thank u this has been a psa.
a goofy boy. probably snorts when he laughs and im not projecting there what are you talking about-
okay, canonically: likes video games, likes retro shit (probably the kind of nerd who LIVES for arcades and record stores and vintage clothing stores even if he doesnt mix that into his personal style), very into music. there’s a lot you can do with this!
imo he’s very caring? like. okay, yes he did withhold mtn dew red from jeremy - but michael still went through the trouble of finding and obtaining that in order to deactivate the squip. i think michael’s a fairly understanding dude, even if he has moments of anger.
just a very warm person. probably the kind of person who stops and makes sure people are okay when he notices they’re upset.
sometimes impulsive. sometimes very restless, imo. bouncy boy.
like w jeremy - you can absolutely send me questions abt michael (or anyone tbh!) and i’ll answer them the best i can! im by no means an expert but ive got pals i can bother in order to help get a solid answer :3
christine
chriiistiiiiiiiiine, the love of my life. a gal w ADD! please don’t forget that! i personally hc that she got into a theatre as a way of like… sort of getting energy out since she’s fairly restless??? track girl christine….. also good
loves herself a lot tbh! like. in the show, its canon that she has stuff to figure out but i personally think christine loves herself and her body and is proud of who she is?
very friendly, very open, very passionate abt theatre! these are basic facts lmao
very sweet! very smart! she’s like... The Girl in all the movies that everyones like “oh no i love her” bc shes just a bubbly gal
writing christine is really hard to describe sometimes. like with all the characters, i write what feels right and sounds right to me and to others.
but like... to be honest, as long as you stay a bit happy and supportive and loving with christine - you’re on the right track.
jake
god - one of my favorite boys to write sometimes because there’s a lot to do with jake’s character
he’s the ultimate cool dude in high school. probably the kind of dude who would join a frat in college. handsome, popular, flirtatious - you fucking name it man.
sorta effortlessly popular and cool. there’s problems underneath - considering his family - but it’s hard to see that he has flaws when everything just comes so easily to him.
a very caring and sweet dude tbh. his friends mean a lot to him and he’s the kind of boy who carries your books and asks where you’re going and how you’re doing
he makes mistakes. he gets aggressive and protective and just angry physically - he did try to attack jeremy, albeit drunk, based purely on the idea that jeremy was having sex w chloe - so like... that’s a good thing to acknowledge
i said hes flirtatious and he is - without realizing it. someone probably has called him out on it and he’s like “sorry what?” bc he was caught up in talking to someone and not realizing that the dillinger charm never went off. because it never goes off. rip.
rich
GOD, my FAVORITE BOY, the LOVE OF MY LIFE, i love him.
squipped: aggressive. a bully. stinky. 0/10.
post-squipcident: getting better. sorta numb at first before happy, outgoing rich resurfaces because He’s Fine! Do Not Worry! but y’know like... he definitely has a lot of problems with what he did and who he was while he had the squip
a bit sensitive imo. easily upset on certain topics, easily angered on others. really misses his mom (i hc she died and his dad took up drinking as a coping mechanism and its mainly rich and his older brother relying on each other but thats just me tbh.)
rich is tricky to write when it comes to his home life. while i see rich’s dad as being a loud drunk, others see him as being physically abusive and so forth and - okay, that’s your decision, but please make sure you’re being respectful and you post trigger warnings because some people are in abusive homes and it’s not a fun thing to read.
great sense of humor imo. flirtatious but in the more obvious “haha hey lets bone ;)” way. alternatively: flirtatious with squip, floundering a bit without it because all he knows is “haha hey wanna fuck”
would probably fight a dick for his pals. rly just loves his friends even if he doesn’t show it.
chloe
chloe is a bit hard to write without saying “shes kind of a bitch” but like... she is and she knows it and she fucking owns it.
casting call: “ confident, crass, sexy, manipulative, and downright mean at times”
so like. she’s nowhere near bein a sweet angel baby uwu
has problems. explore them. she literally was down to fuck brooke’s boyfriend since jeremy was dating brooke yknow. part of it could be alcohol but like... dont ignore that fact. like. she probs needs to talk to both brooke and jeremy.
i think of chloe as someone who can see the potential in others tbh. gets slightly annoyed when people arent achieving what they could - but i like to imagine she gets it after a while since some ppl dont have confidence and such.
yknow the kind of people that take charge when the situation calls for it? that’s chloe. she’s very much a leader. cunning, ambitious - she’s fucking ready.
brooke
more of an angel i guess? sweet, a bit insecure, and a little more caring. not very dominant in situations - tends to be more of a follower (as shown w her and chloe’s friendship)
very caring actually. she literally followed jeremy out and said “uhhh he was kind of a dick to women but i know u like eminem” upon his death in the show??? like??? she literally went to check on this boy.
imo she sorta needs to learn to be bolder. to not take shit. shes probably the kind of person who says yes to a lot of things even if they’re conflicting bc she doesn’t want to like... bother someone and make things worse
emotional, imo. fairly feminine.
its hard to keep describing sdfkjhds sorry
jenna
not popular. remember that she wanted people to be interested in her, which is why she gossips a lot
probably tends to overhear half of the gossip. other than that, i can see her easily finding shit out bc she has eyes Everywhere
bold, fairly extroverted, probably really fucking smart tbh. give her love. she deserves it.
thats both at me and everyone else. jenna rolan ily...
very much a big sister figure, post-squipcident. theres this kdrama i was watching where the main protag lives w a couple other girls and one of the oldest one of the bunch is very much a big sister figure that will call other people out on their bullshit because she knows protag isnt the kind of person to do that? thats jenna. and chloe, but mostly jenna.
probably the kind of person who wants to be helpful imo. she likes feeling useful.
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[ jesus castro, he/him, 29 ] pietro maximoff has been spotted in gotham city! the hero is publicly known as quicksilver, and have often been described as determined, but also arrogant. they have also been affiliated with the avengers, and said to mainly operate in new york city. will they help find answers, or add to the chaos? [ han, she/her, 23, mst ]
triggers: childhood trauma , kidnapping , experimentation , HYDRA mentions , minor violence , auschwitz mentioned , mental illness , death.
hey fam !! here’s my fast boi , pietro maximoff. i love him bunches.
so first things first: he is comics based with mcu tie-ins. and comics before marvel ruined his backstory by making him not actually erik and magda’s son and not a mutant. can u tell i love my son and hate what marvel has done to him ? keep on reading to find out.
pietro was born in the wundagore mountains to magda eisenhardt , a romani woman that magneto met and fell in love with. ( she survived auschwitz because of him i stan ). although pietro and wanda didn’t know it at the time and wouldn’t for many years , erik lehnsherr / magneto / max eisenhardt was their father. magda didn’t stay around for very long , though. not long after , magda fled into the woods with the fear that her husband would find her. pietro and his twin sister would soon enough be given to the maximoff’s , a romani couple who lived down the mountain and had always wanted children. ( note: while pietro was both raised romani and is romani in heritage , a lot of it was lost to him after his adopted parents died which was when he was quite young. he does want to make sure his daughter knows about it and where she comes from but he’s not an expert since everyone from the romani side of his family is dead. )
he was literally that obnoxious older brother but he’s also hella protective and loyal ? he’s a bit of an ass . scratch that , he is 100% an asshole :’)
pietro and his twin , wanda , were raised in transia / sokovia by the maximoff’s , who were an amazing couple and even better parents. eventually , their “ adoptive “ father , django , began to steal food so that he could feed his family. enraged villagers attacked the ( romani ) camp they were living in. pietro was able to get him and wanda out , thankfully , but the trauma from that event was so severe that they wouldn’t be able to recall anything from their childhood for years and not even small details. they had nothing. they’d then travel across europe , fending for themselves and only relying on each other. the streets were really hard. they were hungry and tired on most days and pietro would steal food and warm clothes with his powers but wanda would always say he would get caught one day. ( he didn’t ).
one day , wanda accidentally caused a house to burst into flame through her hex powers , which she could not yet control. superstitious townspeople began chasing her. pietro would try his best to protect and defend her but they were outnumbered and overpowered. thankfully , magneto ( dad !!! ) came to their rescue. they would then join the brotherhood of evil mutants , feeling like they had to serve him since he saved them from what would have been horrible mob violence.
when magneto was defeated in a battle against some powerful guy who took him away from earth , pietro and wanda took it as their chance to leave and went back to transia / sokovia / whatever it’s being called now.
( mcu tie ins ) pietro and wanda were kidnapped by HYDRA ( aka not willingly joining HYDRA ) and experimented on with one of the infinity stones , which only augmented their powers. the second HYDRA fell , they left it and joined ultron ( pietro blaming tony stark for the reason why sokovia / transia was in such turmoil due to seeing stark industries on a shell that hit their home that trapped pietro and wanda for nearly two days ). at some point the twins allied themselves with the avengers and also joined them and fought against ultron , who they had previously sided with.
pietro was injured in the battle against ultron and almost died and so he stayed with the inhumans for awhile. he formed a relationship with crystalia amaquelin , princess of the inhumans. the whole thing was somewhat forbidden since he’s not an inhuman but they soon enough got married. it was p rushed, which is super on brand for pietro. they eventually had their daughter , luna and ? not only did he find out that magneto is his dad during this time but pietro’s a dick and almost killed her by putting her in the terrigensis ( this was much later on , not right after she was born omg ) but hey , she got powers so ! he’s never been the best dad , honestly ? he’s run away from a lot of responsibility , even stuff that wasn’t luna related lol. but he’s trying ? ( with pietro’s age , luna is about ? 5-6 years old. his lil princess. )
the relationship that pietro had with crystal would become rocky due to pietro’s mind being elsewhere and not paying all that much attention to his wife. crystal would then cheat on pietro ,,,, ( note: crystal left some other guy for pietro sksksk ) pietro wouldn’t forgive her and “ vowed vengeance on her and all those he perceived as having wronged him “ but !! crystal’s cousin , maximus , was manipulating his mind and augmenting pietro’s anger towards crystal which was prob meant more for the avengers. he did a lot of dumb shit during this time basically. moreso than usual. but he wasn’t in control of himself or what he was doing so really ? it wasn’t his fault.
pietro and crystal had a messy relationship after that. they’d reconcile , get back together , breakup , fight , get back together , fight together , etc. it was a messy relationship for awhile.
pietro lost his powers for a bit and ,,, it was hard fam he was actually depowered due to m day but i’m just saying he lost his powers w/o m day since it’s a big part of him
honestly !! pietro was in a pretty horrible state at this time. he was taken to attila which is basically inhumans hq , where his medical injuries were taken care of. pietro couldn’t stand being human so much that he underwent terrigensis even though king black bolt said no since it can kill u ! wtf u doing pietro !! he then started to plan a way to steal and bring the terrigensis crystals to earth. pietro ,,, no. angel boi. slow down u gonna kill everyone.
then he made his daughter undergo terrigen ,,,, which could’ve killed her since nobody knew if her inhumans genes would just cancel out her mutant ones.
lots of shit happened ,,,, its just 2 much
pietro was then put in jail and while there he had a serious of hallucinations. o boi
but ig it was also the end of his episode , u could call it ?? his powers were restored and he rediscovered his desire to be a hero !!
pietro recovered the remaining terrigenesis crystals returning them to the inhumans and clearing his name of criminal charges through a lie that a skrull committed all of his felonies.
he joined all new x-factor which was his half-sister’s x-men team !
he actually just claimed to have a falling out with the avengers ,,, which wasn’t rly tru ,,, lorna’s ex bf , alex summers , just wanted pietro to spy on her sksksk
but like ? pietro in x-factor with lorna was one of the best things marvel could’ve done. just siblings working together and on a team together who usually never interact. goals. ( might lowkey have a thing for a certain cajun mutant )
he taught at avengers academy for a hot second !
he’s paid a ton of money for luna to go to a fancy school in england which she eventually just ,,, ran away from lmfao
he’s a hero. but he also doesn’t pay much attention to authority and if he thinks someone is wrong and he’s right then he’ll follow his own path and ignore everyone else. he’s tried to repower mutants with the inhuman crystals and continued to do so after mutants got sick and some even died. while that’s not really canon it does give a good insight to who pietro is. he’s not bad and most of his bad ideas do have good intentions.
he’s been off and on with the avengers for awhile and never stays with them for extended periods of time but they all mean a great deal to him. he loves many of the founding / returning members and cares more for them than he’d ever care to admit.
pietro once ran 300+ miles so he could punch erik in the face lol [ x ]
pietro is in gotham to see what’s going on ? he also has luna while crystal is away doing stuff. so single dad pietro ! he’s never been alone with luna for more than a few days before ! it’ll be fun !
tldr; pietro is messy, an asshole and a drama queen but he’s trying HIS BEST.
stats - tba / pinterest / wiki page.
#gchq:intro#<3#hes just trYING HIS BEST#╰ ° ɪ ᴅᴏɴ’ᴛ ᴇᴠᴇɴ ʀᴇᴍᴇᴍʙᴇʀ ʜᴏᴡ ɪᴛ ғᴇᴇʟs ᴛᴏ ʙᴇ ᴄᴀʟᴍ. 「 about. 」
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yo i'd love some sa headcanon spewing
thank u,,??? sm?? i lov
ohh my g osh which ones to do,,, i’m jus gonna do a couple for each of my Kids so hang in there lol (also thanks to @wordofyourbodyreprise aka em for helping me out with a go o d dea l of these)
melchior:
he vapes,, like all the time
he hates children but loves babies for some reason??
he has te r r ibl e facial recognition
his full name is melchior alwin gabor
is a miracle baby bc his mom had a l o t of complications during the pregnancy
wendla:
a few of her bad habits include chewing the skin off of her lip and biting her nails
she is Killer at makeup and will give eve r yon e makeovers at sleepovers
she smells like the japanese cherry blossom lotion from bath and body works???
full name is wendla rose aurelia bergmann, with aurelia being her confirmation name
she’s got a liiil bit of bpd
angel bb who’s too good for the cruel world
she and max von trenk are actually p good friends bc he works at a bookstore by her house
moritz:
ASEXUAL BB
he’s v depressed and is schizophrenic
he has a hearing brother named alex (lol original rite) who acts as a translator for him
he & martha dated for like a wh i le back in like middle/early hs but they broke up but he still lovs her (n now they’re in a happy poly relationship w otto)
full name is moritz daniel stiefel (ag ain w the originality lmaooo)
ilse:
she’s the friend who straight up buys sex toys for her friends as Gifts
raging lesbian
she collects the most insane prom dresses you could ever imagine
full name: ilse felicity neumann
calls melchior daddy to make him uncomfortable
used to have a fwb relationship w my girl martha
martha:
she steals her boyfriends’ food all th e ti me
she hasn’t been to her parents’ house in like three years bc of Canon Reasons
full name is martha amara bessell
smokes w moritz n has a Special tattoo otto designed
despite having marks on her body that she’s p ashamed of, she’s still not afraid to show some skin bc she’s fl aw l e s s
Fashionista
hanschen:
BI!!!!!! AS!!!!!! HECK!!!!!!!!!
and he’s in Lov with ernst ofc
he’s an emotional and verbal abuse victim (from his biological dad) and that’s why he overcompensates w his ego and attitude
his bio dad left him n his mom early on but then his mom got remarried & had thea n melitta so they’re only hans’ half sisters
he’s the “we get it, you vape” friend to melchior
naturally amBIdextrous
full name: hans peter rilow
if he ever has an office job, he def saves porn to his computer
gave max von trenk a bj in the middle of class once
Short
he’s the clingy drunk
ernst:
he’s gay, karen
he has like,, seven siblings
fluent in german
wendla’s bff
he totally lost his virginity at one of melchior’s sleepovers (thnx hanschen)
he has severe dissociation as well as ptsd, and ocd. he’s one outcome of what can happen with cherrypicking in the churches poor bb :(((
bOI HAS LIKE THREE MIDDLE NAMES
ernst zachary raphael jonathan robel; jonathan being his confirmation name
total bottom ex ce p t fo r so me tim e s
he rly likes flowers/botany and biology
georg:
he plays like,, mcfuckin nine instruments,,,
likes dogs
he’s the kid that everyone thinks is gay but turns out to be unfortunately straight
he’s dating melitta???
lactose intolerant
full name: georg milo zirschnitz
is prbly going to julliard
everyone thinks he n otto r Gay
otto:
he’s an art hoe and the stoner friend
knows how to drive boats
wants to do smth artsy for a job but actually ends up as a pediatric nurse my boy
full name: otto henry lammermeier
in the poly relationship it’s rly him and moritz dating martha but honestly?? they’re p much all dating each other???
likes to Yell
thea:
she & melitta r twins
she n moritz came up with everyone’s sign names
likes to roast her brother
know s e v er y thin g
full name: thea marie rilow
uses text talk Too Much
melitta:
vegan & ace
she’s the broadway bb of the family
triple threat whom??? more like infi n it y thr ea t
she’s classically trained in ballet, swing, ballroom, and tap
musical theatre h oe
full name: melitta barbara rilow
anna:
ik a lot of ppl are like “o yeah she’s marianna wheelan” and i see that now lol,, i didn’t realize this when i first got into the fandom so i went to em and was like ”yo. anna’s bobby’s sister” and thus anna marie mahler was born
she Hates being known as bobby’s sister so she tells everyone that her last name is pronounced like mah-ler instead of may-ler
does wheelchair roller derby
scares ernst
oka y that’s it (for now) lol i hope y’all enjoy it
send me more musicals to do headcanons for!!
#spring awakening#spring awakening headcanons#rainboboy#asks#headcanons#.txt#personal#melchior gabor#wendla bergmann#moritz stiefel#ilse neumann#martha bessell#hanschen rilow#ernst robel#georg zirschnitz#otto lammermeier#thea rilow#melitta#melitta rilow#anna mahler#marianna wheelan#max von trenk#bobby mahler#bobby maler
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questions i felt like answering
answering for both my long-standing deity kintype, and my relatively new one
1. What are you (prophet, God, angel, etc)? two deities
2. What or Who do you represent? stargod: travel, travelers, maps, direction, balance, polaris, ursa minor, and i am the prince of and main representative for every star and constellation feargod: fear, worry, insomnia, anxiety, nightmares, illness, and very minor control over fire and blood (when either is involved with ill will)
3. What do you look like? stargod: i had two forms - a literal star core, and my humanoid form had short wavy silver hair, glowing light blue/white eyes, near-alabaster skin, and raven-black wings with a blue sheen and silver accents. while humanoid, i wore a shimmering silver laurel wreath with a light-as-feathers light blue himation over a chiton feargod: im legit not sure about this one but i think i was a shadow monster a lot
4. Colors/animals/objects associated with you? stargod: silver, sky blue, dark blue, ravens, maps, scales feargod: black, red, white, wolves, claws, bones, teeth, blood, darkness
5. What are you trying to achieve? i dont fully understand this?? cause those kintypes are past lives, i dont really have control over those things anymore...but i guess im trying to be as kind as stargod, and as fearless as feargod
6. What band/artist gives you divine feelings? its moreso songs, not simply the people behind them
7. (for Prophets) How do you interpret messages?
8. Do you have any other limbs that your human self doesn’t? (Horns, wings, etc)? stargod had feather wings on his back, while feargod had sharper teeth and claws, maybe bat-like wings
9. (for Gods) What do you like as offerings? stargod: parts of meals thrown into the fire usually, stuff like moonwater or sunwater, pieces of valuables if you’re a devotee, uhh...idk much else for them but i think a prayer you could do was like, burn a piece of a map with your destination in mind, and it’d give me the hint to help out. feargod: blood (obviously), animal sacrifice (prey only), sometimes human sacrifice (those who have done a considerable amount of wrong) if you wanted my help during war, stolen things i think, bones/teeth, and red or black things (roses, fabric, stained paper, etc). burning a valuable/cherished item was also a direct prayer to me for personal protection in things like love or family matters (yea i was a dick in my rites but my moms the love goddess for petes sake, i govern worries and if you’re desperate and innocent enough i got your back) 10. Why are you here on Earth right now? Andy (my tarot deck) says this; “to follow my intuition and dreams, to face my fears, and change.” 11. Do you have powers? In those lives? yea. I don’t have the power I used to as a human with limited intuitive direction. 12. What element relates to you? stargod - water and fire (thanks to mom and dad) feargod - fire i guess? 13. Is there something (a book, movie, myth) that is similar to you? or reminds you of yourself? i actually cant think of anything for stargod! but feargod is literally Phobos, i just call him feargod to match stargod, whose name i dont remember. 14. How old are you? i dont have definite ages for either of them stargod was born after human’s creation by Helios and Selene in order to look after them and guide them, after the whole Prometheus thing feargod was born somewhere after the time Ares and Aphrodite got together, but where that is in relation to human history in that universe is unknown as of right now 15. Do you have dominion over anything? this was technically answered with #2 16. Do you know any of your mythology? ahhh i take most of the Official Greek God History (TM) with a grain of salt cause i dont believe most of it is canon for me,,,which rly sucks for this life cause i still worship Greek Gods and they had different history here but it’s hard to wrap my head around,, (Helios and Selene being siblings??? what??????) 17. Do you write poetry, paint, to express your divinity? if not, do you do something else? !!! i dont usually! I want to but I dont have materials to paint or the right words for poetry but i really wanna! I’ve drawn a few memories tho! usually I just reblog kin pics, or vent about memories to anyone who will listen. 18. (for Prophets, angels) do you know who your God is? 19. When and how did you know you were divine? hooooooooo shit.....i dont remember when i realized i was the stargod?? being my first divine kintype...i think i was just joking like “lmao if i was divinekin i’d probs be a god of stars or some shit smh” but then i couldnt get it outta my mind...next thing i know i’m waist-deep in memories and sobbing. 20. Any advice for those unsure/new to their divinity? honestly, if you’re questioning being divine in a previous life, specifically a god, more often than not it’s something you either think about from time to time or something you’re super passionate about...it doesn’t even really have to be something you know a lot about or do a lot or are really good at. 21. What are your views on humans? stargod: oh man...this is actually very conflicting...when he was born he saw humans like a mother sees their newborn child. as time wore on they were like my kids, but in a more casual sense. when shit went down leading up to my death though? horrid creatures. deserving of the worst pains. rot. burn. die. ....i was not ok... feargod: pretty much how dying-stargod felt. vermin, disgusting vile things, all of them are dead to me anyways....but the thing is, unlike my twin brother, i had a very soft spot for innocence like young kids, babies, kind-hearted people...yea. if someone killed an innocent person i got pissed and probably considered cursing their bloodline. 22. What would your place of worship look like? stargod was mostly privately worshiped, so i only had portable altars, maybe some good-luck-charm for more traveller-oriented places.....feargod tho? entire temples. granted, they’re small, and meant mostly for warriors, but they’re there. 23. Do you know the rules of your afterlife (if there are any)? stargod was directly involved with the human afterlife...or rather, my assistants were, while i oversaw their actions and guided lost souls. my assistants were responsible for judging and placing souls passing through the afterlife. i dont know what its like being a ghost from that world, but to me everyone just looked like a human, though ghosts were a bit greyed out?
24. What’s your most and least favorite thing about being divine? from both lives, being a god is super rewarding, but it’s pretty tedious. on one hand, you have people devoted to you, willing to push on in your name, and you can see the hope in everyone’s hearts and intention. on the other, it’s pretty demanding work - you have to make sure you give the right commands or direction, help around in the right places, and kill as little humans as possible. you’re born with considerable amount of power, and sometimes it can get to a god’s head, and we’re all also about as emotional as humans, so it can get pretty sticky... 25. What does your Home look like? as stargod, my home was a giant star castle. my room was in the center and each spike led to different rooms. there was no up or down but the walls were beautiful, like that aerogel stuff, if it could glow. feargod didn’t have a home, i dont think? he could take residence with Aphrodite or Ares, but gods dont really need sleep, so he rarely did so. 26. Other than yourself, who do you think is a really cool divine being? personally, stargod was on good terms with almost everyone. i think sometimes he held disdain towards Zeus or other weather gods, but it wasn’t often or really strong. Mostly he just kept to himself. feargod has special feelings in his heart for his parents and his twin, Deimos. Siblings? not so much. Most of his siblings were love gods, so he didn’t very much enjoy their presence. nowadays i totally do tho! 27. Does your divinity affect your day to day life? How? not really...it just kinda gives me things to look back on. i mean, in this life im not good at direction or self-control, and i’m not that scary. i’m not terribly upset over those things though. 28. (for Angels) if you have wings, what do they look like, how big are they, how many, and do they serve any other purpose besides flying? 29. Is there a place on earth that reminds you of Home? being very far away from big or moderate cities at night helps for stargod...id rather not think about feargod though :/ 30. What is your favorite post on the actuallydivine tag? i havent looked at that tag in a long time so i cant remember >_<
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