#i remember like two weeks ago i was happy about some volleyball result and they released the sad marco vid right after

[ugartecoco]

can bvb read the room

[realcube]

ONCE YOU’RE GONE

rq ♥ hello!! can i please request miya twins, sakusa, suna, akaashi x fem!reader an angst one. like they got into a heated argument each other. reader just had enough, maybe take a stroll and got into a deadly accident that cost her life/ memory loss or something. and the hq char regrets it

tw ♥ angst, hurt/comfort, breakups, disappearances, very vague implications of kidnapping, memory loss & injury 

a/n ♥ sorry i couldn’t think of anything for suna </3 

ATSUMU MIYA

♡ he’s never really been an overly religious guy

♡ yet everyday, he finds himself praying that you’ll come back 

♡ and before now, he considered himself a rather patient person, but every second you were gone was filled with anguish

♡ mostly because he knew it was all his fault

♡ nobody blamed it on him though, which only made him feel more guilty

♡ it was late, so he decided to walk you home from his house. hardly with your safety in mind though, just because he wanted to spend more time with you

♡ that was his first mistake

♡ his second was getting so defensive over his volleyball team

♡ he was talking about their recent loss to karasuno high, and how they were all devastated since they had been training for ages

♡ yet instead of comforting him, you simply replied, “maybe you should do things besides volleyball, if you’re getting so worked up about it.”

♡ but all he heard was you being condescending (though that genuinely wasn’t your intention) and telling him to give up something he is passionate about because of one little defeat

♡ you tried to explain that you honestly meant no harm by your statement but atsumu argued that the damage had already been done, hence your apology meant nothing to him

♡ realising that atsumu was just being pissy and taking his frustration at the game out on you, you distanced yourself; walking a few paces in front of him and plugging in your earbuds to tune him out

♡ after marching behind you for a few more yards, atsumu eventually decided that he was finished 

♡ in one swift motion, he turned on his heels and stomped back his house, leaving you to walk the rest of the distance yourself; that was his third mistake

♡ however, after walking for about half a mile, he got a newsfeed notification on his phone titled, ‘four people reported missing in hyōgo prefecture, in the last week.’

♡ it only took one headline for all atsumu’s previous emotions to be swept away and replaced with one that left him motionless; guilt

♡ he continued walking back to his home, reasoning that you clearing didn’t want him near you — anyone could tell by the way you walked in front of him and ignored him— so he must’ve made the right choice to leave you, since it’s what you wanted, after all

♡ and it’s not like y’all broke up or anything, he still loves you and hopes you are safe and to prove that, he apologised and texted you first 

♡ ‘hey, i’m so sorry i was i bit of a jerk earlier.’

♡ followed by ‘text me once you’re home.’  

♡ no response, simply read at 21:45 

♡ that was a week ago, yet he still wholehearted believed that you were going to come back

♡ though, deep down he knew he was just feeding himself the same line over and over again, just so that he wouldn’t feel guilty, and so that the sight of a volleyball stopped making him feel so sick and distressed

OSAMU MIYA

♡ he’s never felt such a sea of emotions at once before

♡ on one hand, he was just happy to see you alive and well; isn’t that all a lover should want?

♡ however, he didn’t have the honour of calling himself your lover anymore

♡ you didn’t remember anything from before the crash, which initially brought him a small tinge of relief, since you wouldn’t blame him for what happened

♡ however, you didn’t remember him at all

♡ so when he knelt by your bed and started apologising profusely, all you did which raise a brow and turn to the nurse, quietly — yet not discreetly — asking who the guy by your bed was

♡ he felt his hear tear apart at such a simple inquiry 

♡ however, instead of explaining himself, he got up and left, “nobody.”

♡ wanting to get it all off of his chest, he told atsumu about what happened, as if he didn’t know that his brother had the biggest crush on you during your whole relationship with osamu 

♡ and of course, upon hearing the news, atsumu ‘snuck out’ later to go visit you in hospital and presumably try to win your heart 

♡ though, there was nothing ‘sneaky’ about the way he loudly fumbled around with the car keys, or the way he tended to slam the door behind him — atsumu knew exactly what his brother was trying to do and although it pained him to even think of losing you, he let his brother pursue you anyway 

♡ he tried to protect you once and it resulted in you losing your memory, so god knows what would happen if he tried again

♡ plus, you were no longer his to protect, or at least that is what he tried to convince himself

♡ after months of daily visits from atsumu —and none from osamu — you were somewhat starting to gain your memory back 

♡ atsumu just seemed so.. familiar, and that was the single best feeling when you are so isolated 

♡ though, there was something off about him that you couldn’t exactly put your finger on, but he reassured you that it was because ‘seeing you hurt changed him as a man’ so of course he’s different from the way you ‘remember’ him

♡ years passed, and you continued dating atsumu in blissful ignorance of the events that happened before the accident

♡ you feel deeper in love with the atsumu you thought you knew and were forced away from osamu (who chose to remain single, he claimed it was to focus on his studies but he truly couldn’t find a second soulmate)

♡ it was only at your own wedding day were you finally able to see osamu once more, though you didn’t really interact with him much..

♡ until he objected during your vows, then, it was pretty hard to ignore him, especially since he appeared sober yet was claiming that you are his one true love, and he regrets ever leaving you 

♡ needless to say, the rest of the wedding definitely did not go as planned

KIYOOMI SAKUSA 

♡ he loved you; and he wished he had showed it more, now that it’s too late

♡ “sakusa,” you cooed, resting your head on his shoulder and offering him a plate of apple slices you cut yourself, while browsing the shows on TV, “what shall we watch tonight?” you inquired, but mostly to yourself since dating sakusa nowadays was similar to dating a literal rock 

♡ no response, as per usual

♡ well, on the bright-side, that just meant you’d get to watch whatever you wanted, unless sakusa spoke up, which he most likely would not 

♡ scanning through all your options, you decided to select some teen romance, coming-of-age movie that you knew sakusa would most definitely not enjoy, hence forcing him to say thing 

♡ however, instead of him reacting in accordance to your plan, he simply got up and left without another word

♡ something about the sight of him with his back turned to you, headed out of your house and back home with even a goodbye cleared your fogged mind and left one fact undoubtedly clear; you didn’t want to be with him anymore 

♡ and although you didn’t want to make assumptions, you surmised that he felt the same way; it was almost a certainty considering how distant he acted 

♡ so of course you cut it off that same night; yet when you proposed the idea of breaking up, sakusa became surprisingly defensive

♡ it was as if all of a sudden he realised how shitty he had been acting this whole time, and how his actions had effected you 

♡ you both yelled over the phone for hours, though it was hardly an ‘argument’, more like sakusa apologising profusely and making — what you believed to be — false promises, while you explained that you had just had enough 

♡ it ended with him almost screaming ‘i love you’, but you hung up on him too soon 

♡ he would never admit it, but he cried himself to sleep that night

♡ there was a part of him saying that he was just being overdramatic and you were nothing more than another lover that will enter and exit his life with the wind, but four years later, he still found himself getting butterflies upon catching a glimpse of you in the stands at one of games 

♡ despite the fact you were cheering for opposite team 

KEIJI AKAASHI 

♡ you two were the perfect couple

♡ study dates, sliding notes to each other during class, midnight strolls, endless support, dancing in the rain; it was like you were both living in your very own slice-of-life romance movie

♡ however, as they say, all good things must come to an end

♡ but for akaashi, that ending came too quickly

♡ “you can do it, i know you can!” that must’ve been the tenth time you’ve said that today, it was like your own inspirational mantra, yet akaashi didn’t seem to be endeared by it 

♡ “no, (y/n).” he repeated with a sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose as he began to guide you to the door, “it’s a silly dream. i probably shouldn’t have even mentioned it.”

♡ “it’s not silly!” you argued, throwing on your jacket as he made it increasingly clear that he didn’t want to continue this conversation, “it’s your dream! you can’t just keep complaining about school if you aren’t even going to try to pursue your passion.” 

♡ akaashi silently shook his head, “go.” it was harsh, but he could only deal with speaking about his work life for so long

♡ “you go.” you snapped, though knowing it wasn’t exactly the comeback of the century, but it summarised your feelings well enough, “i’ve honestly had enough of you. i hope--” 

♡ you cut yourself off at that; storming off before saying something you might regret 

♡ though furious, you really didn’t want things to end with him, you just hoped that maybe one day you’ll be able to have a civil conversation with him about what he wants to do in life 

♡ because he hides it well, but the more you got to know him, the more you noticed that he truly wasn’t happy in his studies, and you just wished he would do something about it or at the very least, let you help 

♡ and he knew this too; he knew it all too well yet still couldn’t bring himself to better his life, even once you were gone

♡ you were critically injured after the accident, and during your time in the hospital, you let akaashi see you once

♡ one visit was his chance to redeem himself, to apologise and help you both align your futures together 

♡ but all he could do was sit with you in radio silence

♡ thirty minutes passed and his mind was running on overdrive, yet he couldn’t think of anything to utter after ‘hello.’

♡ so he left 

♡ no apology, no redemption, to attempt, nothing.

♡ all he could say was that he left with a heavy heart, a heart filled with hope that one day he could return to you despite all the wrong he has done; though that seemed more unrealistic than his dream of playing profession volleyball

♡ he had truly lost his soulmate 

[ventura-starlight]

HAPPIER THAN EVER

remember when I said I was back? haha no. I hit like a major writers block and had some pretty heavy stuff mentally I have been trying to deal with. I am crazy thankful however that you all are still so supportive and kind to me :) I love you all so much. in other news I am so excited for Billie Eilish's new album and once she dropped the teaser for it I had the idea for this fic :) this is obviously not about what she went through and what many are speculating her album to be about but this is my personal interpretation of the line from the teaser video! I hope you all enjoy :))

warnings: angst [more bittersweet than sad imo], mutual break-up, hopeful/sweet ending,

"So is this it?" Tobio sniffled. This isn't how he wanted this to go. Graduation was a few days ago, soon the two lovers would be separated by land and sea. You were both so happy, things may not have been perfect lately but he didn't want to lose you. In the cold of the night, as stars twinkled across the seemingly endless galaxy, Tobio Kageyama realized not everything stays the same. Maybe him wanting everything to remain as it was, was selfish. The pair looked so lost, trapped in their minds as they looked up at the stars. Sitting on the park bench where they shared their first kiss. Now it seems this is where they would share their last.

"You know it's what's best" Y/N sighed shakily as they looked at their intertwined hands. They didn't hate Tobio at all, but Y/N knew this couldn't last. The universe was pulling them apart, their own ambitions and goals in life causing a rift in what some may have seen as true love.

"I know that Y/N but," his voice cracked as tears filled his eyes, "I really loved you. I c-can still love you I promise! I-" his words were starting to get choppy. The setter felt as though the air he was breathing was constantly being taken away, so desperate for things to be okay again. A soft hand reached for his face, drawing Tobio's eyes back to the one he knew he couldn't love anymore.

"You know that's not true," Y/N said softly, odd considering the tears that were falling down their face as well. "I loved you a lot too, but I think we just grew apart" Kageyama nodded at that as his sobs turned to soft sniffles and tears.

"I will always care about you Y/N," he said after a moment of basking in each other for the last time. They nodded softly, silently saying it back. A slightly hoarse laugh escaped Y/N's mouth as they turned away from Tobio's face.

"You have so much talent Kageyama," Y/N began, the feeling of saying his last name settling a weird taste in their mouth, "but we both know we can't stay together. We had a good run and I wouldn't trade any of that time for the world okay?" The tears came back to both of their eyes, flowing in waves, lovers being pulled apart, their hearts along with them.

"You are amazing too Y/N, I couldn't have asked for a better partner these past two years. Thank you for everything you taught me." Pulling each other into an embrace, their bodies shaking like leaves falling off a tree.

As they pulled away from their embrace the pair shared a knowing look. Desperately grabbing at each other's chest, the collar of their shirt, anything they could hold one last time. Smashing their lips together, teeth clashing slightly, the saltiness of the tears still pouring down their face making the kiss seem even more tragic. They pulled away after what seemed like hours. Two lips seemed red and puffy, skin glossy and luminescent due to the duo sitting under a street lamp.

Y/N stood up, grabbing their things, pulling Tobio's hand up to their lips, pressing a soft kiss to the knuckle. Finally, it was over, they walked away as their own people, missing the comfort the past years had given them. The sky was their stage and this was their final bow, a bittersweet ending to what could have been a perfect story.

***

Years pass seemingly in a blink of an eye. Fleeting thoughts weren't filled with regret but rather smiled upon like you would smile upon the memory of adolescence.

The first few weeks after their bow was some of the hardest times they had suffered. Slowly but surely they recovered, opening up again, driven towards their dreams.

Kageyama waits for a game to start, nervous butterflies float in his stomach. as he tries to calm the shaking of his hands his mind floats to them. a nearly silent 'thank you' slips from his lips, so quiet he could only hear it. he knew that this was the result of years of hard work, but he feels the need to thank you. thank you for letting him go.

Meanwhile, Y/N sits on their couch, anxiously awaiting the start of a volleyball match. There he was, their first love, glowing in all of his pride. Kageyama Tobio's hard work had paid off. Y/N never regretted their decision. Maybe in some other life things could work out, but for now, they were perfectly content.

when I'm away from you, I'm happier than ever.....

I wrote this in like an hour, forgive me 🧍 @risjime @sxft-kisses

[babytsum]

wanna be - m. atsumu

friends to lovers atsumu fluff because i said so.

warnings: none, just unedited so might be a lil sloppy lol, mention of konoha x reader (they go on like one date)

word count: 3.5k

wanna be by the internet (2018)

he remembers you from onigiri miya.

your baggy jeans, loose t shirt, eyebags. he remembers it all down to the way you stuffed your face with onigiris to the neon lights the shined outside. you were pretty, but he was indifferent. after all, he was miya atsumu, a player both on and off the court.

to you, he was miya atsumu, osamu's brother. and miya osamu was simply a friend who owned a restaurant and understood the crushing pressure of being a student with a part time job that struggled to pay rent. besides, one day you'd pay him back because you were one smart cookie, though he didn't know in what way. however, he did notice how atsumu made an effort to avoid eye contact while you introduced yourself. he didn't miss the color that made its way to his cheeks when you held your hand out for him to shake.

and he sees you again waiting outside his team's gym after practice.

that day, your hair was tied back. you wore a long coat that went down to your calves and loose black clothing under it. did you always wear loose clothes? you smiled and waved in his direction and his heart skipped a beat. he waved back excitedly until he turned around and saw hinata jumping up and down at the sight of your happy self. turns out, you were karasuno's manager in high school. atsumu, usually confident and cheerful, now sunk into his sweater while his teammate introduced you to the rest of the group.

"i know atsumu. i met him at onigiri miya a few weeks ago."

he nodded as you spoke. he barely knew you, but your presence had a significant effect on him, one that was beyond what he can describe.

so maybe he goes over to his brother's restaurant more, once or twice a week.

"so, how do you know hinata?" stupid question. hinata literally told everyone like a week ago.

"i went to karasuno and became the team manager for their volleyball team," you answered anyways, how sweet of you, "i actually got to see you and osamu play at nationals. that's where i first met him."

all of the sudden, atsumu wishes that he paid more attention to the pretty managers of the opposing teams. although, he does thank whatever higher power is out there that he got to meet you at some point and curses osamu for not telling him about you at all.

"i didn't know you knew (y/n) in high school."

"what do you mean?"

"i just didn't know that she was a team manager and all that, you know? i feel kind of bad for not knowing she existed."

"oh she definitely existed. who do you think i made extra bento boxes for when we went to tokyo?"

"those weren't mine?"

hinata invites you to watch him practice and he doesn't know if its a curse or a blessing.

on the one hand, you can see all of his talented sets and gameplay. on the other, he usually reached peak idiot during practices, at least that's what sakusa would tell him.

that's not going to stop you from sitting down and letting out a cheer for hinata's, and even bokuto's, spikes. you knew that shoyo and kotaro loved the support they got. it gave them motivation, made them perform better. of course, the team wouldn't mind that.

atsumu just wishes he got a few cheers or smiles from you.

the next time you see him, he's sucking face with some hot model with a drink in hand at a party that shoyo brought you to. you weren't surprised. you were close enough to osamu to hear him rant about his brothers antics, so you brush it off like usual when seeing two people getting a little busy. after all, you were here to take a break from studying

by the middle of the party, you're tipsy and cheering on bokuto who was shaking ass to hot girl summer. hinata is passed out on the couch in a fetal position while kageyama sits down and stuffs his face with rice. osamu joins him and witnesses the mess that is you and bokuto. atsumu looks disheveled and everyone already knows why, all of you just hope that the room he went to earlier was not the master bedroom.

"tsumuuuuu," you slurred as you spoke, a happy smile plastered on your face, "you're a manwhoreeeeee."

"what?"

"i'm joking, but also not," you kissed the tip of his nose, "you're a very nice boy."

he didn't know whether to be offended or flustered, especially with the combination of your little antics and the alcohol in his system, which only resulted in a strong of incoherent words that entertained osamu.

"man, i really wish you met her in high school. she was way worse." kageyama added, memories of you blatantly flirting with your close friends for fun.

"she really was. i believe the first thing she ever said to suna was 'holy fuck, how do you look so fucking hot while shoving those jelly sticks in your mouth?'" osamu laughed, the image of his teammate's red face playing in his mind, "the (y/n) you know is more tame, a stressed college student with a low alcohol tolerance."

you gave bokuto's ass another smack as you giggled at the way his ass jiggled. having athletic friends is fun, especially when the stress from your graduate studies needs to be relieved and their pro player money literally prevents you from paying for your own food. you were lucky.

the day after, you drive to the gym you knew they would be practicing at. of course, sakusa had the common sense to not drink the night before practice. his other three teammates did not.

atsumu is the first one to spot you, a big bag in hand, your hair tied back, another pair of loose jeans and a plain t shirt. it's more different from the flattering plants and small top you wore last night, but he wonders how you can look like this after a night of drunken fun. it was almost like you were glowing.

hinata greeted you first, taking your bag and thanking you for the food.

"are your heads okay?"

"i think i died last night."

"you die every time there's alcohol at a party, shoyo."

"hey!"

sakusa snickered while the rest tried their best to hide their laughs. you weren't wrong, though. shoyo does end up passing out on someone's couch after some energetic dancing.

"what about you, tsumu?"

"i don't remember anything that happened except for bo's ass."

"not even the hot blonde girl?"

"the what?" again, everyone failed to contain their laughs.

"you manwhore!" you chuckled, handing him his bento box.

"you should have seen how red he got when you kissed his nose!" bokuto chimed in.

"i did that?" your smile faded, "sorry, if i made you uncomfortable, tsumu."

"it's okay, i don't remember it." he lied.

the memory replayed in his mind again and a foreign feeling came over him. it was warm.

the next time he sees you, you're at osamu's house to taste test his new food. it's osamu's classic duo, his dear brother that loves to freeload off of him and his stressed grad student friend who also likes free food.

when atsumu walks in, you motion for him to sit next to you while stuffing your face. you're wearing baggy clothes again and he's pretty sure that you slept with your makeup still on from the night before.

"osamu, if you keep cooking like this, i think i might marry you."

"gross."

"what's gross about marrying the hotter twin?" you turned to atsumu, a smirk on your face.

"we look exactly alike."

"yeah, but he cooks."

atsumu couldn't argue with that. you were funny. you were always funny and warm even when talking down to him like this. and it made his heart beat faster, his face a little redder, his smile a little brighter.

fuck.

"i can cook."

"yeah, a pack of cup noodles." osamu responded while you chuckled in agreement.

"they're some fire ass cup noodles."

"yeah okay, playboy."

"playboy?"

"do you prefer manwhore?"

"no."

you throw your head back, laughing again at atsumu's expression. for someone who fucks around, he was easy to fluster. and you enjoyed it every time. the way he would look down in an attempt to hide his crimson cheeks, the slight smile that would rest in his face. he was pretty.

it all confirmed osamu's suspicions.

"you guys want to make every sunday a taste test day?"

"yes!" you responded excitedly. more free food? you're there.

"sure."

after osamu packed up some food for the two of you, both of you walked out. the early afternoon sun was scorching and your baggy jeans and oversized hoodie were not helping.

"you wanna get some coffee? i'll pay."

"what are you doing? trying to woo me or something, manwhore?"

"you look like shit and i think it's because you're tired."

"fair. but you have to drive me home first. i need to change and i do not want to walk to the bus stop."

"you didn't drive here?"

"i wanted to take a nap on public transport, sue me."

after a ten minute drive filled with food critiques, you finally made it to your house, quickly changing into some shorts and a t shirt that was actually your size. your raccoon eyes were fixed and you were back in atsumu's car in no time.

"i had no idea you existed up until a few weeks ago."

"nice way to start a conversation, tsumu."

"sorry-"

"you know, when i was karasuno's manager, i thought you were terrifying."

"how?"

"it was after one of your serves, you had this scary look on your face, but i forgot what you were looking at. you scored an ace, though."

"the fangirls."

"huh?"

"it was those squealin pigs that almost messed it up. i remember."

"you call your fangirls pigs?" you scoffed, "you're a whole manwhore." "yeah whatever, (y/n)."

you both went on to reminisce about high school memories, him mostly talking volleyball while you talked about shoyo and tobio being absolute dumbasses. he was interesting, really. his voice was smooth and his tone was always lively, always showing some emotion.

the cafe was mostly empty, a few people scattered around. the bitter taste of coffee met your lips as you hummed with delight.

"what are you looking at?"

"how are you drinking that shit? didn't you order extra espresso shots?"

"yeah, and? i see a ridiculous amount of condensed milk in yours, but i'm not saying anything."

"whatever." he chuckled.

everything was natural, both easing into friendly teasing comfortably. there was always some sort of glint in his eyes, a sly smile whenever he wasn't talking, reddened cheeks whenever you caught him staring.

being friends with miya atsumu was easy.

every sunday was easy. talking to him was easy. thinking about him was easy. a little too easy. and summer becomes fall. and fall becomes winter. and every sunday, there's a new source of energy you find despite your sleep deprived state.

"bo's sending me on a blind date." you tell the twins excitedly.

it's been awhile since you've gone on a proper date. you really haven't had the time for anything except for fooling around at a party once in a while. even if it went nowhere, at least you had something to distract you from the blonde manwhore who's constantly on your mind.

"oh, really?" osamu grinned, "i would have gone a date with you."

"liar. we both remember what happened while you were in school."

"yuck."

atsumu looked between the two of you, the gears turning in his head until it finally clicked.

"you guys went on a date?"

"sadly, yes," you chuckled, "we became closer friends, but that was not the move."

"agreed."

atsumu had already accepted that he had feelings for you. which he suppressed out of embarrassment. he had already accepted that you would have rejected him anyways. you called him a manwhore after all.

"when is it?" he finally asked, jaw clenching. his harsh tone wasn't intentional, but it was there nonetheless.

"next saturday. i'll tell you two about it when we taste test, again."

"you wanna get some milk tea after?"

"no. i have to buy a dress."

"oh."

atsumu watched you walk out the door, a cheerful smile on your face. he felt sick.

and when next sunday comes, you're an hour late.

you looked like you were up all night studying for exams. he recognizes the smudged mascara, the eyebags, the messy hair. except instead of your usual baggy clothes, it's a dress that loosely hugs your figure. he doesn't miss the way your nipples peaked through or the marks on your neck. nasty.

"samu, i'm gonna need more food than usual."

"you got it boss."

the sounds of the kitchen fill the room as you lay your head down. you turn to atsumu, eyes droopy and exhausted.

"you look like you had fun. who did bo hook you up with?"

"his name's konoha. he played for fukurodani back in high school. bo's such a sneaky lil shit."

"how?"

"i may have had a small crush on him in high school when i saw him at a training camp. i told bo and he probably remembered it and thought it was funny."

"nice," he replied, running his fingers through your hair, "are you guys going on another date?"

you closed your eyes, relishing in the feeling of his touch, "i don't think so. it was fun, but i don't think i like him that much anymore."

"ah."

he internally celebrated while osamu rolled his eyes.

and winter turns to spring in atsumu's apartment.

soft white walls, light brown cabinets, a fridge filled with his brother's food. a few photo frames hung around, the most notable once being a photo of osamu stuffing his face when they were kids. the best part was that osamu hated that photo, yet it was also the centerpiece of his table.

you set down the vase of flowers that you were asked to bring. something about making the party feel more "springy" or whatever atsumu said. you were expecting a nice apartment, atsumu was a pro volleyball player of course. but you weren't expecting it to be this nice.

it almost makes you sad. the fact you were constantly exhausted, studying, and stressed while atsumu was the same age having fun and being a playboy. god, this kind of sucks. why the hell was this man friends with you anyways?

"your dress looks so cute!" always count on shoyo to immediately make you feel better.

"you look good even in your big jeans, but you look even cooler?" bo added on, making your cheeks heat up.

while you and sakusa exchanged a small wave, atsumu came out of his room. an unbuttoned short sleeve, white shirt underneath, jeans. wow. god. fuck. and seeing you in the pink dress that flowed around your body, the sleeves being a little puffed, the same train of thoughts ran through his head.

"you needed help setting up?"

"uhm, yeah. can you guys get the plates out and shit?"

"you want us to shit on the plates?"

"shoyo-" you cackled at the confused tangerine headed boy.

it's a good thing you figured it all out before the guests arrived.

seeing kuroo and kenma after so long was refreshing. and the fact akaashi also had a caffeine addiction was comforting. and yachi? she was so grown now. your conversation with the two was interrupted by a tap on your shoulder.

"hey, stranger."

"konoha?"

you gave him a short hug. both of you caught up on the last few months, the situation being less awkward than you expected. it's not like he was trying to get in your pants again, what was the harm in talking? there's nothing wrong with two tired college students having a conversation, right?

suna's voice became distant to atsumu as he observed the blonde across the room. should he go there and save you? his question was quickly answered when you greeted the man with a hug.

"dude? can you hear me?" suna waved his hand in front of his face.

"don't mind he's just being a simp." osamu responded, a smirk on his face.

"am not!"

"for who?"

"(y/n) (y/l/n)."

"that cute manager from karasuno?"

"yep."

"you go, dude!" suna patted him on the back.

"i don't like her like that, we're just friends."

"why is your face red?"

"it's not red!"

"ooo! is atsumu afraid of (y/n)'s cooties?"

"suna, we're twenty three."

"and you act like you're sixteen with this lil crush, atsumu."

atsumu sighed in response. it was too late. you were going to go home with konoha, or maybe you two would go to his many spare rooms. and you would go on another date. fall in love with him. marry him. have his kids.

"she calls me a manwhore a lot."

"she's not wrong."

"aren't you two supposed to be supportive?"

"no." they both said in unison.

"look just offer to give her a house tour or something," suna advised nonchalantly, "works every time."

"good idea."

feeling a presence behind you, you turned around only to be met with a scary looking blonde towering over you. konoha kissed your cheek and bid you a farewell once he realized another figure grabbing your attention.

"house tour?"

"thought you'd never ask, manwhore."

after a tour of a guest room, a bathroom, and a washing machine, the two of you finally made it to his master bedroom. of course, the pillows on his bed were thrown around and there were a few shirts thrown on the floor.

"i may have forgotten to, uh, put those away."

"how are you gonna give me a house tour and forget to clean your house."

"i remembered to fold my blanket!"

"you don't fold your blanket when you wake up? do you even make your bed in the morning?"

"shut up."

you chuckled as he looked away, a poor attempt to hide his face. judging by the mess of clothing, the setter probably had no idea what to wear for his party. the one that was being hosted by him, in his own apartment, right now.

"i see you had a little fashion show this morning."

"i didn't know what to wear!"

"you're the host!"

"what if i looked bad?"

"who cares?"

he looked at you, a confused expression on his face. his eyebrows were furrowed, mouth slightly parted open. your eyes landed on his lips before you immediately turned away. you couldn't get distracted, but he looked so pretty. instead, you sat down on the bed, finding a pillow to rest your head against.

"if it makes you feel better, you look really nice today, tsumu."

"i did it! you finally didn't call me a manwhore!"

"you're still a manwhore."

he pouted while you threw your head back in laughter once again. atsumu took this as an opportunity to sit next to you on his bed, readjusting your head onto his lap. you looked up at his face, eyes boring deep into yours.

"what are you thinking about?"

"you."

"do i have something on my face?"

"no."

his fingers made its way onto your scalp, slowly massaging your head. a moan left your lips at the satisfying feeling. the past few weeks have only stressed you out, but atsumu's presence cushioned you when necessary.

"how's konoha?"

"he's okay, i'd honestly become friends with him if he wanted to."

"didn't he give you a kiss?"

"it was just a cheek kiss."

"you wouldn't mind if i gave you one, right?"

"who cares? i think everyone should give their homies a kiss."

and with that, his lips met yours. his were soft and warm, and though you were caught by surprised, you kissed back. you two melded together until you sat back up.

"i meant a cheek kiss, but whatever."

"you kissed back!"

"no, i didn't."

"did to."

"i don't want your cooties."

"are you five?"

you rolled your eyes, laying back down on the bed. he ended up giving you a kiss on the cheek, then slowly traveled to your ear, then your neck, then dangerously close to your chest. he laid down next to you, arms around your waist, head resting on the crook of your neck. you acted as if you were indifferent, but of course your cheeks still heated up and your heart was beating faster than usual.

"do you wanna be my girl?"

"no."

"rude."

he chuckled into your neck while you grinned, turning your head to look at the pretty setter. it only resulted in more kisses on your face which you happily received.

"is osamu still single?"

"don't even joke about that."

[kurinoot]

[day 4] four priceless treasures | sawamura daichi

-> the pandemic sure has limited us from meeting our loved ones physically, but even the pandemic can’t stop you from showing your love to your boyfriend this valentines’ day.

pairing: daichi x reader

themes: fluff, post-timeskip, pandemic au, flashbacks and all that stuff

word count: 2268 words

note: struggled a bit on this one bc I had to change a bit on specific parts of this fic after proofreading :) + my proofreader friend by the name of @msmeowski​ (who is a HARD daichi stan) didn’t allow me to post this one until it’s p-e-r-f-e-c-t lol but anyways, tell me what you think about this! and lastly, don’t forget to stay at home and be safe! also, I included a spotify playlist as a hyperlink somewhere in the story to add to the experience while you’re reading :)

You stared at your phone, texting your dad about your quarantine situation about giving him an update on your status before he replies with a ‘take care, I’ll see you soon.’ as you toss your phone on the bed and strode to the hotel balcony, taking in the solace of the wind blowing through. Luckily, it was your last day in quarantine and no symptoms have been detected so far. All you were waiting for were the results of your lab testing, and if affirmed negative, then you’re free to go back home.

You were then disrupted when your phone rang an oh-so-familiar tune that was meant only for him. With haste, you lay on the bed as you answered the call.

“Da~i~chi~!”, you teased with a short giggle “Did you receive my gift?”

“About that...can we have a video call?” Daichi asks as he clutches the parcel closer to his body. You hum in response, signaling a yes to at least see his face and see him open your gift. Giddiness fills your inner being before switching to a video call.

A few seconds later, your boyfriend graced your screen, still wearing his police uniform. Noticing you appearing, he flashes you a warm smile, happy to at least see you again albeit virtually. You gave him a warm smile, grateful for this opportunity that you got to see him again, and oh how you want to see and feel him ripped in his police uniform in the flesh.

“It’s a box.” Daichi replies as he closely inspects your gift for him for the day. You gave off a laugh as you rolled on your belly, kicking your feet on the air by his response.

“You sound rather disappointed,” your lips smirked with a mischievous thought in mind for him, starting with the box. “Were you expecting something more?”

Daichi flushed red as he looked away from the screen. “Not that I’m selfish, but I was expecting you. I really miss you, you know?” You could not help but get flustered at his honest response, since you’ve been away from Japan for a couple of years now.

Daichi clears his throat. “Are you doing okay? I know it’s been stressful for the past months.” while he lethargically removes his police vest. You can tell by the way he removes the vest and his dark circles under his eyes.

“I'm fine where I am, Daichi. No need to worry.” You calmly reassure him as you walk to sit down on the balcony chaise, looking at the sky while listening to Daichi's sexy voice. He chuckles as he weakly throws his police vest somewhere in his room, feeling the exhaustion taking over.

You look at him with concern, “The pandemic’s definitely taking a toll on you. Are you even getting enough sleep?”

He slouched as he ran his hand over his face, fatigue from the workload and the strict measures from the pandemic, answering your question.

“Look, as much as I miss you and really want to talk with you today, I want you to sleep. My surprise, I would say, require some walking.”, You say as your boyfriend who now wears a mask of doubt in his face.

“Anyways,” you continue. “Don’t open the gift yet! At least for today. I have a surprise for you tomorrow, that’s why you better sleep well tonight!”

You can see the slight scrunch in Daichi’s face as he replies “Aren’t you still overseas? And considering the situation, you won’t be back home easily.”

‘Ah of course, he doesn’t know that I’m already here in Japan, yet.’ You smile internally, feeling the anticipation and the adrenaline more as you already lay out your Valentines’ surprise for him in mind.

“Well, I had some help actually!”, you bounced back in reply. Remembering that you had your sibling’s help while you were still in transit from overseas.

“Look”, you say with a stern tone. “As much as I really want to talk to you tonight, I also want you to get some quality sleep. I can tell from here how tired you are, my dear Daichi.” You can hear Daichi let out a deep sigh, stuck between wanting to continue talking to you and wanting to take a good night's sleep.

You continue further with concern and underlying excitement, “I don’t want you to be so tired by the time you get to see my surprise tomorrow. You deserve it so much.” Daichi could only feel giddy as he became flustered at your concerned gesture, before agreeing and deciding to sleep.

Daichi wakes up the next day, feeling rejuvenated from the short conversation you both had last night. He’s fortunate that he has the day off work, as being an officer in these trying times can be proven stressful, and the distance between the both of you is definitely not helping the mental strain. He stares at the ceiling for a moment before he feels the familiar buzz of his phone. He opens his phone to the view of your text message.

You can open the box now!

Without any second thoughts, Daichi picks up the unopened parcel beside his bed. He grabs a cutter from his table and immediately cuts the package open. He slowly unfolds the flaps of the box to find a piece of paper and a used red radio he knows too well.

It’s my old radio... Daichi thought as he pressed the switch, and to his joy, it played a familiar song, albeit slightly static. The music then conjures a special memory of him riding his bicycle as you perched on his back when you were both still in high school. Furthermore, he could see the all-too familiar red radio dangling on his bicycle, playing the songs you both like.

You watch as the view of the Miyagi prefecture passes by, watching the sun set in the distance as Daichi pedals the bicycle on the way home with his old radio dangling on the right handle, playing Bread and Butter’s Summer Blue. Your arms tightened around his waist as your eyes closed, relishing the warmth of his broad back as your head lay on him, inhaling his mixed scent of salonpas and sweat after volleyball practice with hints of cologne. A smile plays on Daichi’s lips as he feels your warmth surging through him.

‘Summer blue, summer blue…

Sora dake ga aoi...’

The music started to fade in the background as it continued on to the next song.

He can’t help but clutch his chest in happiness and love, as he feels a surge of contentment in his veins. He closes and smiles as he immediately thinks of the precious memory. A tear then slips through his eye, missing your physical presence. He then wipes the tear that has threatened to pour more before starting to prepare for the day ahead. Relieved from the catharsis, he pulls out the piece of paper from the box earlier and reads a “Here’s your clue for the next surprise!” along with a haiku:

‘The smell of warm broth

Shared by the ramen couple

In the cold autumn’

If his memories were correct, he knew exactly where it was. You were regular customers ever since high school, there’s no doubt that it was the ramen shop that you and he used to go to almost every week, and your shared love for shoyu ramen somehow gave you both the reputation of the ‘shoyu ramen couple’ by the owner, as he calls it.

He saw the same shop from years ago as it exactly was as the smell of the broth enticing him to enter the old place.

The old man who owned the shop recognizes Daichi as he enters before greeting him behind the clear protective cover of the counter, as per safety measures as he went to the kitchen to prepare a special meal, ushering Daichi to an empty seat where they usually sit.

His eyes wandered around the empty place, looking for the possible next clue of the next gift. The owner then comes out with a bowl that has a recognizable smell and serves it to Daichi.

“Here’s your shoyu ramen,” The owner winked at Daichi, hinting at something before continuing, “Specially made, requested by your girlfriend.” Daichi, albeit somehow surprised, folded his hands together with an “Itadakimasu!” before quickly slurping the ramen he loved so much in contentment.

“That girl...her sibling came by saying that your girlfriend has a ramen request.” He chuckled before Daichi stopped to listen to his story. “She thought that you might be too busy to come by so she went ahead and paid for it as your gift.” The owner laughs as he resumes cooking, leaving Daichi in disbelief at the owner before looking at his bowl of shoyu ramen, reminiscing a memory.

As the leaves fall while you are walking down the street in a cold autumn afternoon, you pull Daichi’s hand, leading him to the familiar street right after he had volleyball practice.

“Let’s go to the usual!”, You smiled at him as he followed suit.

The place has seen its years with a smoke coming out from the ventilation shaft with a thick warm smell that led you and Daichi come in further, the owner greeting the both of you as usual with a smile before you two sit at your usual spot near the window of the shop. The owner was familiar with the both of you, eating at his place almost every week, and knows what both of you would order.

“Two bowls of shoyu ramen for the couple!” He teases that left you and Daichi flustered at his statement.

“A-anyways, the ramen w-will get cold if we don’t start eating now.” Daichi says, seeing his cheeks redden as he looks away before he digs in to avoid the awkwardness. You gave off a laugh, making his eyes gaze to you that somehow made him flushed even redder as you perched your chin on your hand, looking at him tenderly.

“Somehow...it makes me happy that we’re a couple.”

The owner tells him as he wipes the counter clean, “Keep her. You don’t find women like her nowadays.” He chuckles as he slips a piece of paper in front of the eating policeman, “She also requested to give you this.”

After a few minutes, Daichi had already finished the bowl cleanly with no traces, quickly grabbing a handkerchief to wipe his mouth afterwards.

“Thank you so much for the food!”, he thanks and waves at the owner before he leaves the establishment to go to his next destination.

‘New Year approaches

As the bell tolls from afar

We pray for good luck’

He chuckles as he reads the paper. “She never fails to impress me with her surprises...”, he breathes optimistically as he wears his mask and wraps a scarf around his neck before going outside.

As he arrived, he noticed the familiar shrine wearing down from the years, but was still being taken care of. A few women, mostly high school girls, prayed for the special day while holding each of their own stashes of chocolates. Daichi went up to the shrine, paying his respects before wandering around, looking for the next clue.

“It really brings back memories.” He whispers to himself as he looks around the place, a smile forming on his lips.

You both stepped in front of the shrine after you both celebrated and lent your wishes for the New Year, with hands and eyes closed in prayer. He could only look and stare at you still, hands and eyes closed in prayer. He smiles at the sight of you earnestly praying.

‘I pray that we would always be together.’

Daichi saw a paper dangling on the tree along with the other wishes, taking what seemed to be your final clue.

‘As the storm passes

Spring has finally come home

Awaiting blossom’

His eyes widen in realization as he rushes back to his house, only to find it unlocked. He catches his breath as he opens the door, without any second thoughts, he removes his mask as he enters to look for the final gift. He finds a couple of luggages sitting in the middle as well as a paper he knows too well. He inspects it further, shocked to see your name along with the words negative written in the results.

Daichi then scrambles as he hears the sound of the nearby bathroom door open, only to see you wet in your towel. You immediately went red in embarrassment before Daichi, overfilled with longing and excitement, rushed to ensnare you into a tight embrace despite your towel-clad body. You hold your breath further as he places a deep kiss on your lips, immediately tasting the shoyu ramen you know too well. You could only drown yourself in his kiss as you slowly close your eyes, wrapping your arms around his neck.

You both break the kiss afterwards, panting as Daichi pulls your head over his chest, longingly hugging you.

“I was expecting that you would be home a little bit later. I even haven’t dressed for you yet!”, you pouted as you rested in the comfort of Daichi’s arms.

Your boyfriend could laugh, flustered with the state of your undressed state, “I missed you, Y/N. I missed you very much.” You could only hug him tighter as you both smiled.

“I’m home.”

He smiled before kissing you again, but this time passionately as he embraced you once more.

“Welcome home.”

back to valentines masterlist

[caxsthetic]

With Time

Kageyama Tobio x F!Reader

Summary: Ever since the two of you know each other in high school, both of you always on each other’s throat. But when some circumstances make you stuck with him in Italy, can you settle things down?

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *. STUCK WITH YOU MASTERLIST .* :☆ﾟ. ───

When he lived in Italy to maintain his dream, never once crossed his mind that someone from the past would slide into his life all of a sudden. No, it's not like he was happy over this whole situation, it was the exact opposite of it actually.

To say that Hinata Shouyou was bearable in his eyes—yes, maybe. At least when compared to you, he would choose the orange-haired man any goddamn time. Yet you really had to show up in his apartment, uninvited (well your brother has told him about it, but it was five minutes before your arrival so that doesn't count).

"I am so sorry, Kageyama!" The second he picked up the phone, your brother's voice attacked his hearing. He didn't want to jinx it, but somehow he had bad feelings about it.

"What is it now?" He leaned himself on the kitchen counter as he listened to the phone call. Did he just cook? No, of course not. He just brewed some coffee that fortunately ended up in success.

"Do you remember (Y/n)?" Your brother asked timidly, knowing the fact that you and the setter never seen eye to eye, "She's my sister, my lovely little sister that become our manager when—"

"Tch, I know. I remember." Dread, it was there on your brother's mind the second Kageyama clicked his tongue, "What is it? Just tell me." He sipped the coffee that he made before, and almost burst it out because of the bitter taste. How the fuck people could drink this?

"Well, so, she was in Italy right now. The same city as yours…" Kageyama hummed a little, telling the man on the other line to continue, "Her flight was delayed and her company could only find the flight next week…" The setter grabbed some sugar and milk as he listened, "So I told her to stay with you…"

The black-haired man was currently pouring some milk on his coffee when your brother finished the sentence, resulting in him accidentally spilling his milk to the kitchen islands.

"MY MILK!" He groaned, searching for a napkin as he sobbed at the sight. It was not because his kitchen became a mess now. It was the fact he just wasted a lot of fresh milk that his club teammates bought him, "You, boke! You just made me spilt my milk!"

"I AM SORRY, KAGEYAMA!" Your brother shrieked, feeling like the second they faced each other, the setter would toss a ball right on his face (that's actually a lot better than him picking a jump serve though).

"Hinata, you know (Y/n) and I always want to strangle each other." He let out a sigh, didn't know what his nationals teammates were thinking over this.

"But Kageyama! She was just a little girl! What if something happened to her?" Something that both of them knew was how independent you are, so he understood that the reason your brother asked him to let you stay in his house— the worry of a big brother, "I know she could take care of herself. But she was all alone… I couldn't bear the thought of her—"

"Just shut up," Kageyama recognized what the orange-haired man was trying to do. Guilt-tripping him until he said okay, "I will let her stay, you don't have to mope around like this." He could imagine the stars inside your brother's eyes at this moment, "Tell me when she would be here."

Then it was silence. There was no sound at all from the other line. This made him nervous. He wanted to ask the orange-haired man about the sudden hush. But before he could part his lips to speak, the intercom of his apartment beeps.

And now he knew why Hinata Shouyou, your brother, didn't dare to say a word.

"I am going to do a service ace on your face."

"NO! I AM SORRY, I AM SO SORRY!"

»»————-　♔　————-««

He woke up that day due to an unfamiliar noise. His ears caught the sound of the sizzling fare on top of the pan—just because he didn't know how to cook well doesn't mean he wouldn't recognize the sound of food being cooked.

It was strange, to know that someone was there with him in the usually quiet apartment. Since you came uninvited two days ago, your presence was a little bit illogical for him. When he saw you in front of the door, he expected you to be feral and gave some snarky comments to him.

But no, you actually bowed a little like you have some real manners, unlike when he first met you. Maybe adulthood taught you the right thing after all. You look way more mature since the last time he saw you. Your hair trimmed neatly, and your face adorned with light makeup.

However, he felt odd. When your brother told him you would stay in his place for maybe a week, he expected some ruckus, unnecessary banter, and non-stop bickering. But the way you acted right now was a total contrast of it, and it just didn't sit right on his mind.

"What are you cooking there?" He sat up from the couch where he slept since you arrived. Yes, he gave up his bed for you (because from what he found on the internet, man needs to have consent), "Toast?"

You hummed as you still focused on the task in front of you, making sure that the sliced bread didn't get overcooked. You were actually surprised that he knew what's inside the pan right now, making a little smile emerge on your face.

Once done, you put the french toast on the plates, right beside a pile of cookies. The silence really started to get him as it was always like this for the past two days. You never once meet his gaze and only talk to him to ask for some permission around the apartment.

He sat down on the breakfast stool, deep blue orbs scanning the kitchen islands in front of him. A smile tugged on his lips as he saw a glass of fresh milk. He didn't notice that a pair of eyes glanced towards him, trying to hold back a laugh as his eyes sparkled with excitement.

Though, your physique really had to betray you as the chuckle slipped from your lips.

He whipped his head towards you, didn't realise as his smile became so much wider than before. At the moment he felt so uneasy. You used to be so annoying in his eyes at the level where he just wanted to toss a volleyball to your head. Maybe if he didn't respect your brother, he might have done that beforehand.

But right now when you were right in front of him, chuckling at his kitchen, it sounded like music to his ear. There's nothing beautiful with your laugh, that's for sure. Yet it brought him back to the moment that he missed the most; high school time—when becoming a king on the court didn't sound that wrong.

You stopped yourself from laughing and hid your mouth with the back of your hand, trying to avert his gaze— that from your eyes, was a little bit intimidating. He pursed his lips, noticing how you seem so uptight now.

"Did something happen to you?" Kageyama was at his limit already, curiosity and frustration crept at the back of his mind, "You are awfully quiet."

His words make you pout. You didn't answer him and just played around with the french toast, popping it inside your mouth after a while. His gaze never left your face, and you could feel it burn.

It wasn't like you hate him or something. But for real when your brother told you to stay at his friend's place, you didn't believe that you would see him. Kageyama Tobio, the best setter in Japan at the moment. Kageyama Tobio, your high school crush (that apparently was more than that).

At first, you thought that you didn't have any feelings toward the setter. Believing that he was just a meanie to your brother. But it was all changed when you always saw him on every volleyball video that you saw—even long after you graduated.

"I thought after all this time you knew that you have a crush on him." You remember every word that your senpai said, "But I guess if you still couldn't get him off from your head… maybe it was more than that."

"I just have a lot in mind right now." You finally speak up, trying to calm down your heart that currently beats like you just ran on a marathon without a rest, "I am sorry, Kageya-"

"Tobio," He swallowed a huge lump as his gaze never once faltered, "I want you to call me Tobio from now on."

You swore you almost gasped when he allowed you to call him by his first name. Is it a sign? If you were still in high school right now, maybe you would squeal, or maybe you even become a stuttering mess. But you were all grown up now, that wouldn't happen. Or so you thought,

"Alright, T-Tobio."

While you want to curse yourself by stuttering out his name like that. Him on the other hand, he wondered about the foreign feelings that suddenly appeared in his heart. No, that wouldn't be possible. Kageyama Tobio didn't have any feelings towards his teammate's sister. At least that's what he wanted to believe.

»»————-　♔　————-««

He was sure that he didn't feel anything towards you. You were just like a little sister to him, someone that he needed to protect. Denial, denial, denial. You were Hinata (Y/n), someone that he can't stand at all when the two of you in high school. Someone that four days ago, he was sure he didn't want to stand on his way.

But he could feel his blood boiled when he saw the uncomfortable look in your eyes as his teammate wrapped his arm around your neck,

"Come on, don't be shy~" The reeking of alcohol could be scented even from where he stood, "How about you stay with me instead? Promise I could be a better mate, if you catch my drift."

Kageyama watched as the scene unfolded in front of him, disgust was written all over his face. He didn't move at all, knowing that you could handle things on your own. He recalled how you even whacked Miya Atsumu's nose when they were in second year, all because the Inarizaki setter said that some supporters from Karasuno were annoying.

But then in the split moment passed, there was something new in your eyes as you gazed towards him. Fear.

It was like his whole body driven by a demonic entity when he suddenly appeared right in front of you. He swatted the hand away from your shoulder, and before you could move an inch, he pulled you towards him, flushing you on his embrace.

"If I know you are here only to disrespect my partner, I wouldn't let you come inside at all." Your mind was gray as you tried to proceed with whatever was happening right now. The fear from before, how your figure touched his warm body, the masculine scent of his cologne, or the words that he said.

It was all too much to wrap your head around that you didn't even realise how his teammate was now out of his apartment. Once the door closed, you immediately looked upon him, and right now as you scrutinized the details on his face, you were sure that the feelings you had towards him were more than just a crush.

"T-Thank—"

"Are you stupid?!"

He pulled himself away from you, eyes blazing with fire as his gaze scanned your face. He didn't know himself why he acted like this. Maybe because he felt so stupid for not acting faster, or that something could happen to you. He should have known to not let his drunk teammate shelter in his apartment, knowing that you were there.

"Why didn't you push him away?! Why are you just standing there waiting for me to rescue you?!" If this was how you acted around people that harassed you, it would drive him crazy. Because he knew that he couldn't always be there for you.

You were no one before you stood in front of his apartment, so why would he care for you now?

"I could handle that by myself, thank you!" No, you can't. If only it was just a total stranger you would push them away and maybe crack some of their bones. But that man was not a stranger, at least not for him.

"So why did you just stand there and do nothing?! You are seriously letting him touch you like—"

"Because I am afraid that I hurt him or something!" You snapped, didn't want to be criticized like this, "You are going to have a match next week! What if I ended up injuring him?! What if he was the star player?! It would affect your whole team and I never—never want to be a burden for you!"

Then once again the room filled with silence. But it's not like the soothing one that you two shared at breakfast, it was not the peaceful silence like the two of you had every time you watch some movies together. No, this moment suffocated you.

This was the exact scenario that usually happened in high school. Both of you raised your voices until the upperclassmen intervened in the never-ending bicker. He would always end up scoffing, and you would turn your back on him. You thought that maybe the two of you could settle things down under these weird circumstances. But maybe it's just you trying to get your hopes up.

"Sometimes boke is more suitable for you than for your brother, you know that?" He snickered a little. Kageyama Tobio just snicker in front of you, and you couldn't help but gape there like a fish.

How could he refrain his feelings now? Knowing that you are so caring for him to the extent that you even think about his well-being when you were in danger. From all the reasons behind your fear, it had to be something that involves him.

He could feel his heart skipped faster when he heard the reasoning behind your dumb action. It was the exact feeling that he got when your brother told him it was alright to be a king. It was the feeling of assurance, the unfamiliar suspicions of being cared for. Maybe, maybe it was the awareness of being loved. Though he doubted it was a romantic one—at least that what he knew now.

He couldn't help himself to walk towards you, extending his hand to touch yours. His eyes flickered for a second into your face, searching for a sign that made you feel apprehensive. But there was nothing unpleasant inside your eyes, and that only was enough for him to keep going.

There was some kind of electricity when his finger made contact with your hand. All these years, he had pushed a lot of people from his life. Some stay, some not, and right now he really wanted you to be the one who stayed. He was careful, afraid that if he was too straightforward about it, you will pull away.

But then you interlaced your hand with his, like a magnet that has been calling for her to be bound. His breath hitched, not sure about the next step that he should take. He knew nothing about these unknown feelings, and he wasn't sure if your hand interlaced with him was just your generous gesture to reassure him, or was it something more.

"Tobio,"

Shouldn't you be the one who was confused? After all, he was just shouting at you before acting all sentimental all of a sudden. Yet you were not. Instead, you called out his name, his first name that he never thought he would allow you to use.

He was afraid, once again he was afraid. He was supposed to take care of you as you waited for the flight to come home. It was not his intention to catch feelings, but here he was anyway.

The two of you just stood there with one hand laced to each other. No words being spoken as two minds were thinking about the same thing. Both afraid, both didn't know what to do as the realisation came into mind.

But then when his eyes found yours at the same time, one thing he knew for sure was that he wanted to explore these feelings with you. Something that he had confidence in when you gaze at him with that beautiful glim in your eyes, was that maybe, you too, wanted to do the same.

Even the two of you just the same, oblivious people who realised their feelings a little bit too late. But maybe with time, both of you could see that too late would be better than almost.

"Want to cook dinner together?"

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*     ༶• ┈┈ ⛧ ┈ ♛ ♛ ┈ ⛧ ┈┈ •༶     *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

“Stuck With You” Enthusiast:

@sakusakiyo​ @kunimwuah​ @ayachii​ @meepeo​ @gyubit17​ @blacckdiamondposts​ @muffins-puffins​ @evermorehaikyuu​ @rintarhoe​ @chunkchowder​ @kkyeoptae​ @oikawhas​ @greenleaf-fantasy​ @sugawsites​ @mochi-poof​ @baby-boy-taichi​

Reply on the masterlist if you want to get tagged on this project! Have a good day!

[memxntomxri]

𝒫𝑜𝓅𝓅𝒾𝑒𝓈 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝒫𝑒𝑜𝓃𝒾𝑒𝓈

ᴍᴀꜱᴛᴇʀʟɪꜱᴛ | ʜᴏᴍᴇ

𝘱𝘢𝘪𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 - past!sawamura daichi x sugawara koushi, sawamura daichi x kuroo tetsurou

𝘨𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘦 - angst

𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘤 - and now, in the aftermath, all koushi can smell is poppies and peonies, drowning him in their scent

𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘥 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘵 - 2.1k

𝘵𝘸 - major character de@th, implied h0mophobia, hanahaki disease, no happy ending, break-up, sam misusing taylor swift songs, so much angst

𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘦𝘴 - this is the result of a lot of inspiration screaming in a Discord server. thanks emmy (Noisy_Emmy on ao3), lou (LouEve_094 on ao3) and lena 🤍 also like alskejfljlvkjlkwejkj taylor and daisuga angst together???

also daichi is horrible here but he isn't actually like that istg. i just needed him to be asshole-ish for maximum angst purposes. the timeline's also weird af but i gave up halfway through trying to make it logical lol.

song lyrics credit to august by our queen taylor swift!

⋆┈┈｡ﾟ❃ུ۪ ❀ུ۪ ❁ུ۪ ❃ུ۪ ❀ུ۪ ﾟ｡┈┈⋆

salt air and the rust on your door

I never needed anything more

*＊✿❀　❀✿＊*

Looking back, Koushi should have seen the signs.

*＊✿❀　❀✿＊*

When they met in first year, the first thing that Koushi had noticed had been Daichi's warm smile. It was reassuring and steadfast, like someone reaching out and telling Koushi "I'm here." And when they stood together on court, Koushi felt invincible, because Daichi was there, a silent pillar that pushed him up, up, upwards.

It was all too easy to fall. Daichi was reassuring, always there, attractive, kind, and before Koushi knew it, he was in love.

He kept it to himself at first, of course. Koushi didn't even know if Daichi swung his way. And, well, he was just... scared. Scared to lose the friendship they had built. Scared to lose their dynamic on the court. Scared to, ultimately, lose Daichi.

whispers of "are you sure?"

"never have i ever before"

*＊✿❀　❀✿＊*

Looking back, Koushi should have never dived off that cliff.

*＊✿❀　❀✿＊*

During summer break in their third year, after they had beat Shiratorizawa and were preparing to go to Nationals, Koushi dropped by Daichi's house often. It was natural, of course. They were "best friends", after all, even though one was hopelessly in love with the other.

Longing stares became lingering touches became staying over became-

"I really like you, Daichi."

"Mmhm."

A soft, tentative kiss.

"Are you sure about this, Suga?"

"Yes, Daichi. Stop being such a worrywart."

Foreheads pressed together.

"I'm sure about you."

Soft, soft enough that Koushi's ears don't pick up on it, "But I'm not sure about you."

but I can see us lost in the memory

august slipped away into a moment in time

'cause it was never mine

*＊✿❀　❀✿＊*

Looking back, Koushi should have let go.

*＊✿❀　❀✿＊*

They were happy together. It was like being best friends, but with kisses and cuddles and more. Koushi didn't know when he had ever been this happy. The memories were like gilded gold to him, things he never wanted to let go of. He was giddy every time he remembered that Daichi's soft smiles, fond in their demeanor, were for him.

Even if his eyes were a little distant at times.

and I can see us twisted in bedsheets

august sipped away like a bottle of wine

'cause you were never mine

*＊✿❀　❀✿＊*

Looking back, Koushi should have known better.

*＊✿❀　❀✿＊*

One night, when they were curled up together in Daichi's bedroom, AC whirring and a few cans of cheap beer left forgotten and discarded by Daichi's bed, sated and content, Koushi's tongue slipped.

"I love you, Daichi."

A sleepy murmur.

He didn't feel the man against his back stiffening.

"O-Oh, okay, Suga."

Even after all that they had done, he was still Suga, never Koushi.

Daichi was probably just shy.

If he had known that this would be the beginning of the end, Koushi would have never let himself be so careless.

your back, beneath the sun

wishing I could write my name on it

will you call when you’re back at school?

I remember thinking I had you

*＊✿❀　❀✿＊*

Looking back, Koushi should have been more careful.

*＊✿❀　❀✿＊*

When they returned to school, Daichi acted like everything was like it had been before summer break. Koushi was confused, but it was surely only Daichi trying to protect them. They still lived in the Japanese countryside, after all.

And it wasn’t as if Daichi stopped seeing him or anything! It was just… less time together. But they were third years trying to win Nationals, it was natural for this to happen.

but I can see us lost in the memory

august slipped away into a moment in time

‘cause it was never mine

and I can see us twisted in bedsheets

august sipped away like a bottle of wine

‘cause you were never mine

*＊✿❀　❀✿＊*

Looking back, Koushi should have stood up for himself.

*＊✿❀　❀✿＊*

Quick makeout sessions in the clubroom, some heavy petting, a brush of pinkies against each other in the hallway - that was all that Koushi had left of the Daichi he had known in the summer.

A soft smile.

Undivided attention.

A warm embrace.

Oh, how he longed for them now.

back when we were still changing for the better

wanting was enough

for me it was enough

to live for the hope of it all

*＊✿❀　❀✿＊*

Looking back, Koushi should have run.

*＊✿❀　❀✿＊*

Daichi was pulling away, but Koushi convinced himself that he wasn't. Sure, in the deepest, darkest parts of him, he knew that he was losing the dark-haired man, but Koushi forced himself to stay in the moment. Daichi was probably just stressed out from studying and the responsibility of being a captain, right?

After all, Koushi loved Daichi, and Daichi… well, even if Daichi didn’t exactly love him yet, he still cared for him. Deeply.

Right?

cancel plans just in case you’d call

and say “meet me behind the mall”

so much for summer love and saying “us”

‘cause you weren’t mine to lose

you weren’t mine to lose

*＊✿❀　❀✿＊*

Looking back, Koushi should have seen the warning signs.

*＊✿❀　❀✿＊*

Koushi sat on the bench, fingers anxiously drumming on his thigh. He was in the park behind the mall they went to every Saturday together to get food and window shop. (Well, Koushi shopped, Daichi gave opinions.) Where was Daichi? Koushi had flaked on a family outing with his cousins who were visiting from Kanto so that they could spend time together, but Daichi was nowhere to be found.

Koushi checked his phone again. It was already 1PM, and his last sent text, left on read at 11:30AM, glared back at him.

Slowly, Koushi picked himself up from his seat. It was fine, something had probably just come up.

Three hours later, his phone pinged. Koushi lunged for the device, nearly knocking his desk lamp over.

Daichi 💗: hey suga, sorry for not making it.

No explanation, just a halfhearted apology.

Koushi set his phone back down.

but I can see us lost in the memory

august slipped away into a moment in time

‘cause it was never mine

*＊✿❀　❀✿＊*

Looking back, Koushi should have never left his house that day.

*＊✿❀　❀✿＊*

Koushi skipped up Daichi’s driveway, intent on spending some time with him that afternoon. He knocked twice, face lighting up when Daichi opened the door, looking adorable in his casual clothes.

“O-oh, uh, Suga - what do you need?” He seemed nervous.

Koushi frowned. “Daichi, I sent you a text half an hour ago saying I was coming over. Did you not get it?”

“Oh, yeah - I-” Daichi mumbled.

Someone came up behind him, slinging an arm over his shoulders. It was the rooster-headed captain from Nekoma. Koushi’s frown deepened. Why was he here and why was he touching Daichi like that?

“Oh! Vice captain-san! Daichi didn’t mention you would be coming over!” he greeted.

Koushi’s heart stuttered. Of course. It all made sense. The stares that went on for a little too long, the lingering handshakes, the too-friendly competition. The only thing he was still confused about was where he fit into the entire thing. He bowed stiffly. “Kuroo-san. Um, Daichi…” he turned to him. “Can I talk with you for a bit?”

Daichi nodded, and he turned to Kuroo. “Just keep playing the movie, I’ll be back soon.”

He followed Koushi down the road, silence falling between the two who had always had something to laugh about together.

Koushi licked his lips nervously. “D-Did we ever mean anything?” he asked softly.

Daichi sighed. “We never were something, Suga.”

“W-what?” Koushi couldn’t find it himself to say anything else.

Daichi exhaled, long and low. “Suga, we were a fun distraction,” hairline fractures in his heart, “for a bit, but it was never something serious.”

Chips began flaking off.

“B-but I love you!” Emphatic and frantic, trying to make Daichi understand.

Another sigh, this one a little frustrated. “I don’t know what this is, but it isn’t love, Suga. You need to open your eyes.”

Koushi stopped in the middle of the road.

“So this is it, huh?” he said, his heart finally breaking into shattered fragments.

“Yeah. Now, if you’ll excuse me…” and with that, Daichi walked away.

The flowers came that night, red and pink, like the blood that stained them.

and I can see us twisted in bedsheets

august sipped away like a bottle of wine

‘cause you were never mine

*＊✿❀　❀✿＊*

Looking back, Koushi should have guarded his heart better.

*＊✿❀　❀✿＊*

Koushi deteriorated fast.

Within a week, he could no longer play volleyball.

Within two, his mother had found out.

Within two and a half, he had refused the surgery, a legal adult now.

Koushi would not lose his ability to love, even if it killed him.

Within a month, he was in the hospital.

but do you remember?

remember when I pulled up and said "get in the car"

and then canceled my plans just in case you'd call?

back when I was living for the hope of it all, for the hope of it all

"meet me behind the mall"

*＊✿❀　❀✿＊*

Looking back, Koushi’s last days were placid.

*＊✿❀　❀✿＊*

The memories were painful to look back on, of course. But at the same time, Koushi recalled their moments together fondly. Even if it had ended in an inferno with his heart as collateral damage, his time with Daichi had also been the warmest sunlight.

He knew he was going to die. Everyone around him was confused as to why he didn’t just let them cut out the roots in his lungs, and along with them his ability to love, but they didn’t know what it felt like to be in love, rushing down the path, breathless, overjoyed, free.

Koushi would die before he let that feeling slip away from him, bittersweet as it was.

His flowers were poppies and peonies. Death, love and honor, he mused. Fitting, for his and Daichi’s story. Death was imminent, love was unrequited, and Daichi had turned out to be a man of dishonor, abandoning him.

Koushi supposed that Daichi would get what he “deserved” one day, too, even though his heart hurt for the man, still caring about the brunette even though he had stomped on his heart. He’d noticed how Kuroo looked at Nekoma’s setter, and he knew that like him, Daichi would only ever be a replacement.

It was heartbreakingly intriguing how fate came around back to itself.

remember when I pulled up and said "get in the car"

and then canceled my plans just in case you'd call?

back when I was living for the hope of it all

for the hope of it all

*＊✿❀　❀✿＊*

Looking back, Koushi still had something to say.

*＊✿❀　❀✿＊*

The steady beeping of the heart monitor was interrupted as the sound of the opening of his hospital door filled the room.

Daichi stepped through, and the fragments of Koushi’s heart skipped a little.

“Suga.” he greeted, seemingly uncomfortable. After all, what were you supposed to say to your ex-nothing who you were currently killing slowly, even if it was involuntary?

“Daichi.”

“U-um… How have you been?” he asked.

“As well as can be expected, I suppose.” Koushi replied wearily. Breathing had become a labor in and of itself, and he was having oxygen pumped into his failing lungs. “Why are you here?” he deadpanned.

Daichi at least had the wherewithal to look ashamed. “I came to apologize. I did you wrong, Suga. Please just get the surgery. You’re still my best friend-”

“Stop.” Koushi held a hand up weakly. “You broke my heart, Daichi. These are the consequences, and I’m not going to forgive you just to assuage your guilt. You can’t expect sorry to fix everything.” Daichi’s face revealed a storm of emotions.

Koushi sighed. “Please just go…” he mumbled quietly.

Daichi nodded, and as fast as he had arrived, he was gone.

Those were the last words Koushi ever spoke to anyone.

for the hope of it all,

for the hope of it all

*＊✿❀　❀✿＊*

Looking back, Koushi was at peace.

*＊✿❀　❀✿＊*

“Sugawara Koushi, age 18, died of suffocation from roots in his lungs on August 13th, 2012 at 22:08. The cause of death was Hanahaki disease, and it seems like his affliction was sped along by a visitation by its subject, and Sugawara-san was struck with a violent attack. Resuscitation efforts were unsuccessful.”

- Excerpt from the notes of Dr. Hayato Ayame

Finally, in death, Koushi was letting go.

⋆┈┈｡ﾟ❃ུ۪ ❀ུ۪ ❁ུ۪ ❃ུ۪ ❀ུ۪ ﾟ｡┈┈⋆

© ʙᴇᴛʜᴇʏᴅᴏᴄʀɪᴍᴇᴡʀɪᴛᴇꜱ 2021 - ᴘʟᴇᴀꜱᴇ ᴅᴏ ɴᴏᴛ ᴄᴏᴘʏ ᴏʀ ʀᴇᴘᴏꜱᴛ ᴡɪᴛʜᴏᴜᴛ ᴄʀᴇᴅɪᴛ

[huearmy]

Clumsy

This is Soulmate Series. I’ll be doing one for each member.

________________________________________________________

Summary: Of all the possible ways in which your connection with your soulmate could’ve manifests, such as birthmarks or dreams, you and your person share physical pain. It would be enough for the two of you to want to get to know each other soon, the problem is that you are the most clumsy person Hoseok doesn't know yet, and all he wants is to find you and protect you from the world.

Pairing: Soulmate!au Hoseok x Reader.

Genre: Fluff, ANGST

Words:  5781

Rating: PG-13

Warnings: I dont really know if this is a warning or not but the is description of pain and injury, some of them are kind of... bad. Sorry.

Hoseok have a really clumsy soulmate. It had been two years since he started feeling your pain as if it is his.

He didn't found you yet, and the suffering of feeling under his skin your auto destructive nature increase his frustration.

You cut your fingers a lot, sometimes with paper others with knives while cooking, or with scissors doing some manual work - he can say the difference by now. You sprained your right ankle twice in eight months, and definitely have a cat that scratch you once in awhile. It's amazing how you get to know a person just because of the way they get hurt on a daily basis Hoseok can handle with your constant banging on furniture and doors, new bruises on hips, knees, elbows, and ankles almost every day. What he can't handle is when you do waxing. Like, don't you know that he will feel it too? Or don't you care? Can't you just shave for his sake? That fucking pain in his legs, under his arms and groin hurts to death. He never know when it is about do come, because apparently you are a person with a flexible routine and do these things when you have free time, he assumes, so sometimes he is having a normal conversation and suddenly he screams - and not the type of Hoeeok's screams that everyone is used to. Are screams of terrible pain and despair, that fill his eyes with painful tears.

Not to mention his horrible period cramps - Hoseok prefers not to think about it.

But he knows that you might suffer because of him sometimes too. For example when anxiety takes over him and his stomach aches and he can't breathe and his chest burns... besides the pain you must feel sad too. Or when he's tired from dancing,  arms and legs too sore to move, you wouldn't be able to walk neither.

Even if sometimes it looks horrible not knowing you, feeling pain instead, he would always picture your face in bed time. He would stare the ceiling and fantasy with the color of your eyes and the sound of your voice, each time building a different face that can't satisfied him. Just you in reality will be enough.

Hoseok has always been a romantic person, who likes to be in a relationship, to walk hand in hand in cute dates, and have someone to call his own. Since the first time he felt you hitting a little toe on the corner of a piece of furniture, though, he was never able to take an interest in anyone again. No girl, however incredible and beautiful, was enough to fill the void in him. Feeling you being stupidly clumsy started to be more exciting than flirting with someone he was actually seeing in front of him. He missed you so much without even knowing you.

_____________________________________________

"Hyung, you want go eat with us?" Jimin's head apers in the door ajar, bringing Hoseok from his wondering.

"Sure" Hoseok smiled back, dead hungry, already standing from his desk. "Let's eat! Let's eat!" He sang with sound effects. "Oh" Before he could reach his friend he stumbled on nothing, a sharp pain in his big toe making presence.

"What was that, hyung?" Jimin laughed.

Looking confused to the floor, Hoseok giggled.

"She must be in a hurry." He stated, feeling that he is right.

"Oh." Jimin said surprised, although he's already used to Hoseok talking about you like that.. "You already know her this well?"

Hoseok laughed.

"Kind of. She is always tripping around..."

Hoseok let out a sigh. He needs to find you and protect you from the world, because apparently you can't to do it by yourself, and even if he doesn't know your face yet, or your voice... He loves you. And you are so damn clumsy! Every time you trip, beats your head into something or get sick he have a heart attack. Hobi just want to take care of you... He loves you.

____________________________________________________

You are a really clumsy girl. Sometimes you just don't know how you still alive, or with all limbs in place. Like, when you were six you got the prowess of knocking over a bookshelf on top of yourself, and luckily only lost a milk tooth. When you were nine you fell three flights of stairs because you was looking at a plane trough the window, resulting in a whole week in hospital, during holidays. Seventeen was your age when you give up of collective sports, after breaking a girl's nose in a volleyball match by accident - and she was your team mate. You never learned how to drive for the world's sake and most of the time you order take out instead cooking.

You hate yourself for being so clumsy. You always did. Because is awkward and tiresome... And you are so ashamed sometimes, like when you dropped ice cream on your high school crush. But now you are also guilty. Two years ago when you first felt your soulmate pain - a slap in the butt, and for some reason it always happens - you knew he would suffer because of you. You swear that you try to be careful, but it's not enough. So you feel guilty. You feel you don't deserve your soulmate.

You need to find him. Find him to protect him from yourself. Ironically.

The day you both finally met the pain will go away.

"Y/N honey, can you help me here?" Your coworker, called you from the other room. You put the wedding rings in place to the great moment and calmly walked to her, confident in yours, not so high, high heels.

"Yes?"

Next to the window, the bride was having her make up and hair done in her white robe, and you couldn't help but get jealous. It happens in all your jobs with weddings, because all that beautiful brides found their soulmates...

Your coworker pull you to the corner, clearly annoyed.

"We have a problem." She said. This sentence can mean anything, so an alert light out in your mind.

"And it is?" You asked in concern.

"The groom's mother is allergic to roses."

Your eyes widened.

"The whole decoration is made of roses. We need to change for another flower. Right?" You said, already reaching for you phone.

"Wrong. The bride want roses. Even though her mother-in-law is having an anaphylactic attack at the moment for snooping around the church decoration she doesn't want to change. The luck is that it didn't happen during the ceremony and there is still time to fix it."

Your brain worked hard during a second - aside from the questionable selfish stance of the bride who probably already knew about such an allergy - working so many years with organizing events you already got a little used to it.

Remembering something promising you opened your instagram, looking for a florist you’ve worked with a few times.

"I know where to get really realistic artificial roses, and I can bargain a really good price if I go in person."

Your coworker smiled in adoration.

"Go get then, honey."

You demanded someone to continue your previous task over the radio, while texting the said florist with one hand. You are a clumsy girl who choose a job in which it is necessary to divide your attention between several tasks at the same time and still make everything perfect, without breaking anything and still having the chance of the client to change his mind at the last moment for you to have to solve it. And actually you are pretty good at it. Just to be sure you passed as far as possible from the ice sculpture being made in the lobby, asking for an uber and walking at the same time could be dangerous when around fragile things.

Your plan was to get enough money to open your own event company, and you're almost there, maybe in a year you could be putting the plan into action. You would love to find your soulmate already being successful like that, maybe it will help him or her not to find you so clumsy. Still, you would like more than anything to meet your soulmate soon, not in a year or more.

Every day when you left your house to work you daydream with you bumpim with a beautiful person on the busy sidewalk, or at the door of a café, probably spilling hot coffee on them, or finding them at one of the weddings you organize, being the cousin of the groom or something like that. Your relationship would begin with appologies, but it would be funny, and the future you both will have together would be bright, cute, with lots of hand in hand cute dates, and unexpected trips to the emergency room. Every time you see a bride's happy and fulfilled smile you think about it, not that you want to get married specifically, but finding your person is almost a necessity after two years of knowing that they are somewhere in the world waiting for you too.

You sat carefully in the back seat of the uber, so as not to hit your head, already counting in your budget from what you could get the money to pay the extra cost of fake flowers and programming your bargain in your head for a good value. But as much as your professional mode was turned on, you were having trouble focusing, a strange feeling in your stomach bringing you anxiety.

________________________________________________

At the restaurant  with the boys, filling his belly with delicious food and well-deserved doses of alcohol -  on a day off is ok to drinking early, and Taehyung is driving, not him - he still too thoughtful to fully have fun. He still thinking hard about you.

You didn't hurt yourself during the last two hours to remember him of your existence, but he just didn't forget not for a second. He even started to overthink about thinking about you so much, which isn't exactly normal, anxiety making him tense. The laughter of friends around him and the good food failing to take away from him the feeling that something was wrong. He wished he could pick his phone and call you to be sure you are ok. On the other hand, if something bad was happening to you, he would know in his own skin, so why stress so much?

All he wanted was to go home and sleep - after it took so long to arrive at the restaurant, stopping at several places before to shop and pay bills, it took most of the afternoon.

"Ah! It wasn't so! You are being mean to me, hyung..."  Jimin was whining about something Yoongi had said, making all of them laugh.

But Hoseok was still not having it. He got up from the table murmuring a 'I'm going to the bathroom', without waiting for an answer, or that they would notice at all. In the rest roo, he washed his face and made some funny faces to te mirror to relax himself.

"OK!" He excitedly said to himself, ready to get out of the bathroom and bright the world.  Hoseok almost had a heart attack as soon as he closed the bathroom door behind him, with a loud noise of a metal tray falling on the floor and glass breaking. A few meters from him, in the middle of the mess, was one of the waitresses, on her knees. Without hesitating, he stepped forward to help her. He helped her to get on her feet, searching everywhere visible if she got hurt. "Are you ok?"

"Yes sir, thanks. I'm just a little clumsy." The waitrees awkwardly smiled.

From the table, his friends watched the scene with interest, wich one of them knowing what bond of pain you two have and how awkward you seem to be, imagining that suddenly Hoseok could have finally found you, hoping that was you. But Hoseok already knew it wasn't you, the cuts on the waitress's knees didn't hurt him, he was just being polite to help, hoping that when you get hurt, you'll have someone to help you too.

Another waiter came to help, and he can go back to the table, going straight to the plate of food he had left unfinished, now feeling like eating. His six friends were staring at him in expectation. Hoseok swallowed his food and laughed flatly.

"It wasn't her." He said.

___________________________________________________

You got that damn fake flowers in time to redecorate the whole wedding hall in time, and with a fair price. That kind of thing certainly raises your self-esteem, because damn, you are an incredible talented professional. On the way back from the florist, you had to go to the office to resolve some more bureaucratic issues, which delayed you to return to the wedding as a staff. But you can put on some makeup and perfume while you run to your uber, rigth? Yeah, just take of your shoes, and run barefoot to avoid twisting your ankle, and try not to run over anyone on the way. You almost entered the wrong car in your rush. Almost.

You texted your coworker telling her you would be there in twenty and made eye contact with the driver.

"I'll pay double if you go really fast." You said, putting on the seat belt.

The driver raised an eyebrow to you.

"Are you this late?"

"I need to attend a wedding on time." You smiled with you best puppy eyes.

He started the engine.

"Yes ma'am".

________________________________________________________________

They were already arriving home, Hoseok's mood a lot better, a little bit tipsy too. He was messing up with Jungkook and Yoongi while waiting for the elevator, the other boys stayed behind in the parking lot picking up the useless shopping bags of the day.  He was ok in changing his plan of get to bed early to more soju and beer on a karaoke night - nothing better than drunkly scream songs at the top of your lungs to a machine that gives you points for it to liven up a day that was strange.

Their dorm was a mess in less than ten minutes, smell of cheese snacks and fried chicken in the air, loud and exaggerated laughter, play order defined with rock paper and scissors. The youngers were struggling to set up the karaoke, Jin and Namjoon were giggling in they spot in the couch choosing the song for one another - expect loud screaming notes.. Hoseok went to the kitchen to put the beer on ice, but I couldn't find the cooler anywere.

He was looking in the pantry when Yoongi came after him.

"Need help?"

"I'm just not finding the cooler."

"Hmm." Yoongi leaned against the doorframe " Are you feeling better?"

"What?" Hoseok let a embarrassed laugh out.

"Stop. We all notice when you are not ok." Yoongi were serious "What happened?

Hoseok sighed.

"I felt weird the whole day. And the thing with the waintress got to me... I was anxious, but I'm ok now." He smiled "I know theres a rigth time to find my person, and I can't do much to speed this up."

Yoongi got silent for a moment.

"Aren't you afraid to find them? Not even a bit?" He asked without looking Hoseok in the eyes.

"No" Hoseok said without hesitation.

He knows Yoongi personal crisis about finding his own soulmate, how it scares and get to the insecurities of his hyung. But he don't feel this way. He already loves you too much to be afraid. Hoseok assurance didn't surprised Yoongi one bit, it actually made him smile.

"So I think a shortcut for you is to look in emergency rooms out there, at some point you’ll find them." He said.

"Oh hyung... I already thought about it, but it’s nothing romantic." Hoseok whinned reaching the cooler on the bottom shelf.

At the end Jimin chose a song for Jin and namjoon to sing together, a children's song that the two sang as if they were vocalists in a punk rock band. Teahyung slipped and fell on his butt dancing with them. Then Yoongi sang a party song like it was the most emocional and heart touching thing ever. Jungkook performed a really emocional song in a really emocional way, making most of them drunk crying. The beer was gone. Jimin and Taehyung practically serenade each other and got the lowest note of the night. When Hoseok's turn came Jin skipped the line and did a duet with him too, damn they’re lucky that the apartment is soundproofed, because the neighbors wouldn’t stand the screams.  About an hour singing the soju and the chicken were also running out, the maknae was sleeping in a corner of the sofa as if the noise did not exist, and some were already too dizzy to be jumping and dancing in the middle of the room. Hoseok was not one of those, even when it was not his turn, it was as if he suddenly had a lot of energy accumulated in his body - which can be considered strange as he is usualy a quiet drunk.

They were debating out loud what song to choose next, Hoseok with one of the microphones in his hand and a wide smile on his face when

it happened

.

For the boys who saw it from the outside, they couldn't understand what was happening. Hoseok's face contorted in pain and he fell to the floor abruptly. And there he stayed.

Inside he was in agony. In an instant he was fine and having fun, in the next everything hurt and it was impossible to breathe. His head was throbbing, as if he had been hit hard on the left side, making the world go round. His left shoulder also hurt so much that he couldn't even move his fingers - almost the same if it was broken. The skin, especially on the face, stinged like dozens of small cuts. But the worst was the burning chest, as if his lungs did not have the strength to draw air, the feeling was that he was drowning. It was like he was dying.

Jin and Yoongi were by his side in one moment, putting putting him on his back, not knowing what to do besides. They were panicked seeing their friend crying in pain on the floor when there was apparently nothing wrong with him.

"Hoseok-ah whats happening? Can you talk?" Yoongi tried with no response.

"We need to take him to the hospital." Namjoon stated.

"I'll take the car." Jin decided. "Can you guys pick him up?"

"Hyung, you are too drunk to drive." Jungkook, who woke up with the commotion, said with scared and worried eyes.

"What do you think we can do then?" Jin did not intend to shout, but he had no control over the situation.

Taehyung putted a hand on Jin shoulder. "Jimin is calling the emergency."

Infact Jimin was on his phone at the corridor, his choked voice asking for medical help.

The discussion of what to do or not, the boys obeying the emergency attendant's recommendations over the phone, the despair of the other members, the karaoke song selection menu still playing in the background ... Hoseok was not processing any of this. He just had a terrible thought. A realization that made him cry more than the physical pain he was feeling.

That was your pain. You were the one dying. He was losing you.

_____________________________________________________________

Taehyung was the most sober of the group, so when the paramedics arrived, he was the one accompaning Hoseok in the ambulance -  the others called their manangers and waited to go to the hospital in aother way. He answered questions about what they drank and ate and about his hyung's medical history while the paramedic examined him in the tight space. Although he was unable to breathe or move properly, there were no physical signs of the pain he was feeling, and the information given by the youngest boy also did not help, because in fact there was nothing wrong with Hoseok's body, he he was unharmed and healthy.  

With the only sight being the ambulance's monochromatic roof and unable to breathe enough to speak, Hoseok just cried. He wanted to get up and run to find you, to save you ... even if he has no idea where you are, even without destiny he wanted to move, do something. The panic and anxiety playing with his head, making him think of a thousand possibilities of what could've happened to you. So much pain he has felt in the last two years connected to you, but nothing has been so scary. What if someone hurt you? If he had already found you, would he have been able to protect you? ... What if he never found you? Hoseok found himself hoping the pain would not go away, afraid that if the pain disappeared he would know that you are gone.

Hoseok were too devastated to hear Tae explaining about the soulmate bond of pain between you, nor the paramedic saying that then all he could do to help was a dose of morphine. He panicked even more when the medicine, injected into his bloodstream, started to take effect and his body started to go numb until he fell asleep.

Upon arrival at the hospital, a manager was already there to assist Teahyung and not leave him alone. Hoseok was referred for observation, as a 'soulmate case'. There wasn't much to do with him, so knowing the reason why he was admitted to the hospital, the nurses in the ward where Hoseok stayed decided to keep an eye on any patient with symptoms that matched his, just in case.

__________________________________________________________________

It wasn't even high-speed fault or anything. In fact, when you asked the uber driver to help you get to the wedding faster, he decided to take less busy routes, without breaking any traffic laws, just taking shortcuts. And everything was going well, you would get there in time ... Until you came across a drunk driver who advanced the signal and hit the side of your car, rigth in your door. While the uber driver only had a wrist dislocation and the drunk guy had no more than a few scratches, it was a different story with you. Of course it was, otherwise it wouldn't be you.

A broken collarbone and left arm, a concussion with possible complications, and what was more frightening and you thought it was going to kill you, a broken rib piercing your left lung that filled it with fluid preventing you from breathing. You were sure you were going to die and everything you could think as you watched the firefighters taking you out of the hardware with a blurry view was '

damn my person must be freaking out now.'.

You didn't see it when you arrived at the hospital, since you were convulsing, but if you were awake you might have seen Hoseok passing by you to the oposite direction on another stretcher while you were being taken to the operating room. You spent about six hours in surgery and when they sent you to the intensive care unit, your condition was more stable, but the doctors still haven't considered you to beout oft risk. You were breathing with the help of devices and being medicated so that the clot in your head would dissolve. Visits were not allowed at first.

________________________________________________________________________

Hoseok was feeling restless in his hospital room, the intravenous access to his arm, injecting serum and pain medication, was bothering him. He was numb and it was scary. The clock in the wall was showing eight in the morning. At this hour everyday, regardless of whether he is  awake and already working or sleeping until a little later, he would know you were getting out of bed to start your day, today he has no idea how you are... Or if... No. He doesn't want to think about that possibility.

A nurse came into the private room with a breakfast tray, making the mananger sleeping in the side couch to wake.

"Good morning" She said with a smile, putting th tray on Hoseok's lap. "Sir, the hospital café is open." She smiled to the mananger too, who got up and left still sleepy.

Hoseok satared to the food in front of him with a pout, not wanting to eat. The nurse took his medical record from the edge of the bed and made some notes, observing the dosage of the serum.

"How are you feeling mr.Jung? Any pain?"

"No. I'm... ok."

The nurse just nodded and writed some more in the record.

"Theres not much more we can do to help you, so untill twelve the doctor will come to discharg you."

Hoseok wasn't feeling talktive, so he nodded in silence. The nurse gave the door a suspicious look  and when she talked againg in was almost a whisper.

"We tecnically shouldn't have done that, but the other nurses and I think we found your girl."

It took him a second to understand what she meant by those words, and then he practically jumped on the bed, suddenly feeling energized. A lot of things running on Hoseok's mind. Noticing his agitation she went on talking, now with a careful look.

"This girl checked into the hospital last night, at about the same time as you, and suffered trauma that matches the pain you described you were feeling. I can't guarantee it's her ..."

"If I see her I'll know." Hoseok said with conviction, picking the tray and putting it on the side, ready to get up and go to you.

"Oh oh oh... calm down. You can't see her now, she is on ICU, no visits."

Hoseok thought he might cry in frustration.

"Please... I need to see her."

He looked so fragile and he pouted so cutely that the nurse couldn't do much besides melt and say yes to him.

"I'll talk to the head nurse and see what to do. But you have to eat everything huh." She said going to the door.

"Ok." Hoseok happily satarted to eat, and the nurse couldn't belive in the sunshine smile she was seeing in his face.

________________________________________________

Is not the first time you see yourself in a hospital room, everything is quite familiar to you like the antiseptic smell, white light, and some characteristic sounds like those of machines helping you to breathe. And no, it's not just because you are always hurting yourseol in dumb ways, you had to remove your appendix when you were thirteen, for example. What matters is that when you opened your eyes you already knew where you were and why, and all you could do at the moment was to press the red button on the side of the bed to call the nurse and cry with happiness for being alive.

The confusing part of it all was "Why am I in a private room?" You asked the nurse.

It was a clearly expensive private room, that you couldn't pay, if you used your savings to start your business you would have to work two years to recover the money. And why in heaven there were so many flowers in the room??? A lot of them of various diferent times of flowers. There must have a error and you were mistaken for another patient, because you don't know anyone who would give you so many flowers, much less pay a room like this to you. And even if there are balloons tied to the edge of the bed and one of them has your name written on it, nothing could convince you that you were not exchanged with somebody.

"I don,t know miss. You were transferred here yesterday morning with the bills already paid." He said without looking away from the screen beside you.

"Paid by whom?"

The nurse didn't know how to awnser you and left right after, letting you with just the tv control and still a lot of doubts and paranoia. You cell phone was destroyed in the accident, but you wanted it so badly. With it you could try to resolve this situation. The thing was wait till visiting time, it is probably your mother who comes to see you and she will know what to do.

Well, no one told you what time it would be, but waiting would do no harm. So at lunch, as other nurse were helping you to eat - since one of your hands is full of intravenous accesses and your other arm is in a sling because of the broken cravicle - a light knock on the door drew your attention to a silhouette visible through the frosted glass. The nurse besides you looked at his wristwatch and excused hermself to her feet.

Why did she look excited?

It confused you for a second, but maybe her shift was ending and the someone at the door was there to replace her, that's what you concluded. She went out and closed the door, leaving you alone.

The door opened again and a man - without nurse's uniform - entered. The nurse pratically pushed him inside. You were sure he was there to talk about the misunderstanding of the rooms, and you already had the arguments ready to apologize and try to make the situation less strange ... when you two made contact and you were speechless. And you knew.

Hoseok was so anxious to met you, the doctor didn't let him see you up close, and even if you were all intubated and swollen, through the window of the ICU, he knew you were his person. He got you a better room, and bought you flowers - all his members did too, thats why theres were so many of them, the baloons were Teahyung's idea -, and now he thinks everything was a little overhelming, making him afraid of your potential reaction.

But you just looked at him in silence, wide and watery eyes. The truth was that you were feeling so many things and your heart was so full that you couldn't form sentenses, couldn't chose what tell him first, you onl sure that your future were standing right in front of you, ans tha you already had a crush on him.

He hesitated for a moment.

"Hi." He said.

Your lips quiver lightly, and than you started crying.

"Im sorry. I didn't mean to worry you."

Hoseok didn't know if you were talking about the acident or everything else, but he didn't want you to cry for any reason. He walked at you and got a sit in the chair besides yor bed.

"Hey don't cry. I'm happy! Happy to see you!" He made a cute silly voice and smiled and you heart melted completly. "No need to cry or feel sorry, ok?"

He wiped your tears away with the back of your hand, and you both felt like electricity pass through your bodies from where they touched. You tried to lean towards him to not lose his touch, but the new angle brought a sharp pain in your shoulder, making you hiss. He went on a lot of apologies, asking if he did something wrong and if he should call the nurse. And all you could think was that you were doing it again.

"Did it hurt you??"

The voice that left your mouth was fragile and insecure. Hoseok understood and his face softened. He intertwined his little finger with yours, as he couldn't properly hold your hand.

"The moment I saw you all the pain was gone." He said, voice deep and chaming smile.

Your pale face got a new shade of red.

"God that was so cheesy!" You whined, all embarassed, if you could you would be hidding you face in your hands.

"It's true though! Do you want me to stop with cheesy things? I didn't mean it to be cheesy..." Oh my god you made him insecure, he was so nervous to talk to you, just like a teenager.

"No. Don't stop, please... I can be really lovey dovey, and I love cheesy dates and pda, and cliche displays of affection too. I live for those stuff. I literally work with it.." You tried to fix and his wild smiled made you relax.

"Good, because I draw hearts in everything." He said.

Hoseok exchanged his place in the chair for a piece of the bed beside you. He just wanted to be as close to you as he can, even if you weren't ok yet to get all the hugs he was holding back.

"But seriously. After I saw you for the first time yesterday, I didn't feel any of your pains anymore. I think it proves that you are mine."

You really startet to cry this time, it fisically hurted because of your wonds, but it was mentally and emotionally relieving. You were so happy that you didn't die and now was with Hoseok - your person, your soulmate. For so long you wondered what kind of person he would be, you imagined yourself being scold for your clumsyness, being called selfish or inconsequential for not thinking of someone else suffering with you. Of couse it was your insecurities talking. Now seeing that Hoseok is nothing but a sweetheart, you couldn't help yourself but feel even more guilt.

"Thank god... I'm so sorry for everything I put you through. "You said between light sobs.

"Hey... don't cry that I cry too." Hoseok took your face in his hands with all the care in the world, as if you were going to break if he got it wrong. "It's not your fault. And even if it is, I don't care ok? All waxing is forgiven."

Your eyes got wild and you pout.

"Sorry. I have horrible allergies to shaving, so I thought a momentary pain would be better than one that lasted for days."

Hoseok laughed.

"See, you were caring for me. And now I will care for you."

Hoseok was biting his tongue to not say that he already loves you - because he thinks it's too soon and theres no need to be hurry. Inside your head you are exactly the same. Instead of saing anything, Hoseok juts got closer and lightly kissed your forehead. You closed your eyes and sighed deeply. None of you said 'I love you' out loud, but you both understood.

Now I will care for you.

___________________________________________________

I’ll be working on other members parts with no rigth date to post. Let me know if you liked it, so I can prioritize that.

Thankyou ~

[jaredandlee]

Dream and the story behind

26/6/2019 Wed, 1525

Yeesshhh, what’s with these dreams I keep having and somehow remember?

First things first, there’s this friend I have in secondary school, when we met he was the fat/adorable/extrovert/happy-go-lucky kind of person, during Junior years we never really talked much nor did we got into the same class, but during those times, I’ve known him as a “Friend who has a high proficiency in Malay but not much else in others especially math” guy.

But things changed when we entered Senior years, as he and I were chosen to be in the hostel’s students club with a bunch of others. And I’ll admit, I was not a happy camper when a note was handed to me saying “please come down to the end of the cafeteria at 8 pm sharp”, but I went there anyway.

When the president of the club explained how she chose us and why I got hesitant with leaving the club as the people I was with were mostly students seen everyday, but then I realized, I didn’t know any of them, and they’ll never know the true me if I leave, so there I stayed, expecting some friendships to be made and awkwardness to be subsided.

And after the meeting, I got to know the real him, he was a planner, he was a host, he was someone a lot of people admire, free of stress and full of happiness. At year 2 of senior year, he was the president of his volleyball team, he was an honorary member of the school, the discipline of leadership camp,

But I'm getting pretty off track of the dream.

But one last thing, about two weeks ago I went back to Malacca for the school anniversary, and the first thing I asked there is which booth did he worked around the school.

When I saw him, being a PE teacher, his years of training got him slimming down to an admirable size, either he was wearing sport shoes, or he got taller since the last time I saw him, (which was about 18 months ago.) When he saw me, the first thing he said was, “They said you were looking for me?”

And I was surprised he looked happy to see me, but I was wrapped up in the anxiety of not getting back to Kampar on time that I stammered something he did not expect. Somehow, instead of replying an actual answer, I sighed to him and said something like, “I'm never getting back on time,” And after I said it, I immediately regretted it, cuz he got confused and turned to focus on the friend/teacher beside me.

We never talk that much, he wasn’t like a brother to me or anything, he was a like a...nevermind...

Anyways, the dream took place in a dark room, where I remember comforting him on something, I tried to go for a hug, but he was surprised to my gesture he gasped and hugged me tight, it was like I felt his sadness and misery with just that hug, his chin on my shoulder, tears streaming down, and just…hugged me.

The position was off I think, we were both sitting on a mattress or something as we sat across from each other, and it was something I didn’t know I could do. I felt his struggles of being called cute and round, his boring life working for his dad in a store, his relationships with girls that were dear to him, his responsibilities and how it lead him to be tired all the time, but during this whole dream, I think I wanted to hug him for a very long time. He came a long way to where he is now, and in the next month or so, he’ll be off to China and study… something physical I guess?

But what does the dream implies?

I think, at times I was there for him, like when we were responsible for the transactions on nightly supper/takeaway for the students who ordered from a specific restaurant. When he was supposed to be there for the transaction, he would either forgot about it, by literally bailing and goof off with his gang or simply because he was busy with others.

I never hold grudges, but for almost a whole year, he would be absent for at least 50% of the time, even though I was capable of handling the situation by myself, I would still be pissed off with him finally realizing his duties, rushes to see any bad outcome, but sighs in relief when nothing bad happened, it would be like,

“Oh man! Dude, I'm so sorry about that, I must have got carried away with *insert random excuse* and lost track of time, I promise you I’ll handle it next time.”

And sometimes he did, but most times he relapsed back to his old routine and tries apologizing over and over, and I would be blunt to his actions and multiple excuses.

Now that I think about it, he was just trying to make the best of his time as an exam free student and wants to live out his life as one, while I was narrow-minded not trying to have fun and finish my duties without negative results.

As for the dream and it’s meaning, I think I’ve covered enough literature to assume that, even when he’s at his most vulnerable, when he’s at his most collapsed state, I would still be there for him, lend him a shoulder to cry on, let him know I’ll be there for him, even when he’s not there for me.

[brucebaxter]

Can We Increase Height After 40 Surprising Useful Tips

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Taller Bigger Faster Stronger

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[s3venpounds]

1-50

damn seriously whos doin this fam. like im enjoying myself but im not sure yall even care at this point lmaooooo 

1. have you ever been in love?

i’d like to think yes. if im wrong ive got a HUGE storm coming. pretty sure im in love atm who knows tbh.

2. what are your favourite colours and why?

a sort of lilac shade of purple. idk. 2 reasons i guess. i remember in a video i saw purple is the best color to stand out in terms of cartoons and clothing so thats how they get some villains to stand out so im like heck yeah attention ! lololol that and the color itself just seems “soft” idk

3. who was the last person you held hands with?

UHHHHHHH CK.

4. what is your zodiac sign?

Taurus stubbornly proud.

5. how many times have you read your favourite book?

6 times.

6. what are your favourite films?

how to train your dragon. treasure planet. high school musical series. hercules. pacific rim.big hero 6

7. what kind of weather do you like?

rain. lots of it. or just sunny or slightly cloudy with  ALOT of wind. i love wind. it makes me sleepy.

8. do you prefer sunrises or sunsets?

sun sets. crazy mindsets and shenanigans happen once the sun sets. but sunrises are good for waking up to while cuddling.

9. what kind of weather represents who you are as a person?

a flood. literal flood warnings. overbearing, extra, clings to the area long after its done. damages everything a little bit. everything is dirty afterwards and everyone is highly annoyed. some idiot decided to swim

10. what’s your favourite animal?

avians. most birds really. i just REALLY want to fly without the aid of a huge plane or something. like squirrel suits or jetpacks

11. what is your favourite song right now?

Lie to me George Nozuka

12. what is your favourite song of all time?

uhm no. I actually don’t show everyone this song because its special to me so i only show it to people who are either close friends or lovers.

13. do you like sunny days or rainy days better?

rainy days. most def.

14. have you ever been heartbroken?

yeah. 

15. what does the perfect kiss feel like?

it feels like every other kiss from every other person doesn’t compare. the lips feel like theyre in the right place. times seems to stop. nothing around seems to matter. past present and future intertwine and creates a phenomenon around you two and suddenly you aren’t aware of anything but the feel of their lips, how warm they are and how fast your heart is beating.

16. what is your favourite poem?

i don’t have a specific poem in mind but i loved a bunch of poems from lang leav’s love and misadventure

17. who are you most inspired by?

a multitude of people. depends on what youre asking about. say if its volleyball im most inspired by the manga characters from haikyuu most notably hinata shoyo because he loves to fly. if its in terms of how physically fit i am it would most likely be chris pratt. its different things and people depending on what youre asking

18. are you spiritual?

pfft i’d like to think no. but its a pretty general term so i could be who knows.

19. what is your favourite plant?

anything that eats spiders, mosquitos and any other venomous creepy crawlies or just any bugs.

20. what is your favourite feeling?

freedom. rushes of adrenaline. or just love. passion burning in the form of love.

21. what is your favourite word?

juxtaposition

22. are you an artist?

nope. i would like to be but i lack the discipline and patience for it.

23. what is your favourite flower?

lavender or lilac? idk

24. are you happy?

im not SAD. but im not happy either. im not neither im more of a constant sad and happy. at the same time

25. what are you thinking about right now?

should i confront this person or not on the day of birthday and assuming i get a negative result shall i drink my memories away? most likely.

26. what emotion do you feel most often?

annoyance and frustration

27. what is your favourite season?

winter.

28. are you in a relationship?

nope.

29. are you an introvert or extrovert?

ive been told im extroverted so ill go with that

30. do you prefer the moon or the stars?

stars.

31. what is your favourite scent?

her. she smells like happiness, the adventures shes been on, the smell of comfort. i just REALLY like it when someone im interested also smells delightful. it like amplifies everything. 

32. where do you feel most at home?

st clements park i ‘spose. maybe my computer chair. in the rays of sun in an open field?

33. what scares you the most?

death.

34. do you believe in soulmates?

yes. 

35. what is your favourite thing about yourself?

my singing? i guess? i use it the most and i enjoy it when i get to sing. or say dumb things with impressions of famous characters or actors/accents

36. what is the nicest compliment you’ve received?

“nice outfit” 

37. who is your favourite music artist?

ahhhhhhhh its a 3 way between Hedley, Goo Goo Dolls, and Aj rafael

38. what was your first kiss like?

awkward, literally not a full kiss just a peck.

39. are you a sensitive person?

apparently so. i’ve been described as emotional and passionate so i suppose.

40. when was the last time you cried?

couple of weeks ago?

41. do you believe that love can last forever?

not forever. forever seems like a label or chain if i die i don’t want to tie down my partner. if they fall even harder for someone in the next life i think i would be wise to let them be happy. 

42. what do you think happens to us when we die?

this is a bit morbid but i personally think we becomes ghosts but we can’t leave our body. when we pass we’re still conscious and see everything that happens to our body but we can’t move. so we get buried, burned etc. screaming at the top of our lungs but unable to do a thing.

43. have you ever broken someone’s heart?

sadly. yes.

44. what do you think about when you can’t fall asleep at night?

how many rounds of masturbating can i go before i pass out involuntarily. lmao jk . i set up my dream like “ okay i’ll be in… a zompie apocalypse living in a somewhat safe city having a sort of drama with other survivors and trying to live day by day off the little rations everyone gets.”

45. do you believe in aliens?

it’d be a lonely ass existence for earth to be the only life for a couple billions lightyears

46. what is the nicest thing anyone’s ever done for you?

deal with my shit. honestly im a handful.

47. do you find it hard to trust?

no. i sort of trust everyone until proven theyre not to be trusted. 

48. are you secretive?

to an extent yeah. anyone is usually.

49. what colour are your eyes?

brown? idk i really dont care ahahaha i’ll let my future spouse deal with that.

50. do you have a nickname?

Ag(silver on the periodic table since yknow. my names silver. >.>), tinman, silver yo yo, silverado, silver city.

okay seriously, whoever is doing this, are you doing this out of curiosity or because i asked for it? lmaooo

[saikostories]

HAIKYUU - The Dark Spots on the Sun pt1

It was just another boring school day for Shoyo Hinata. He didn’t learn much in class, and rarely just paid attention in general. He knew it was bad and would backfire, but he was excited to go to practice. So instead, he watched absent mindedly at the sky through the classroom window... silently counting the minutes until the final bell rang, signalling the end of class. He wondered what they would do... perhaps a practice match? Perhaps receives? Maybe serves? Anything was good. Feeling the rush of hitting the ball over the net and across court.... he couldn’t wait. Volleyball was one of the only things that brought joy into Shoyo’s life. It would be one of the only moments when he didn’t have to put a fake smile on for the others. It’s the moment when he smiles for real.

Shoyo’s life hadn’t been the best. His father died a long time ago, right before his little sister, Natsu, was born. Shoyo and his mother both took the death in a bad way. He stopped talking to his school friends, quit any sports he was involved in, and rarely did his school work for almost a year. His teachers understood why and they didn’t force the young Shoyo to do much during the year of his grief. His mother, Amaya Hinata, took it badly as well. She started to drink almost every night and would wake up so hungover that she could barely get Shoyo to school and herself to work on time. It only got worse when Natsu was born. Amaya, who would take her anger and sadness out see how many beer bottles she could finish or how hard she could throw them against the walls and the floor, would also take it out on whichever Hinata sibling was closeby. It was rarely Natsu since she was still so small therefore it was usually Shoyou. He would always protect Natsu from any harm that would try and come her way. Shoyo never hated his younger at all, not even when his injuries were really bad. He always found great joy in taking care of her and having someone to keep him company. In some ways he felt bad for her. Even though she didn’t get the brunt of the force physically... she was almost always regarded as the child who Amaya had been planted with. Most nights, when Natsu cried a little louder than usual... Amaya would scream that she shut up.

“How could he leave me with this? A silly little girl and a good-for-nothing son...? How am I supposed to cope? Bloody mess...” Amaya would mutter before reaching into the fridge to down another bottle of beer. It was a never ending cycle of torment. But at least if Natsu wasn’t touched... Shoyo could deal with the rest of Amaya’s harsh and drunken habits. He managed to find out when his mom had a somewhat decent day and when she had an awful day by just the way she opened the front door to the house. Shoyo would always have warm food made for his mother when she returned to try and make the day better. He knew he was safe if his mother ever thanked him for the food... which didn’t happen often; and If she ate the food at a quick pace, he knew the day had been alright... But he still needed to keep his guard up. If she ate the food at a slow and scowling pace, Shoyo would just start preparing for any pain to come his way.

His mom would hit him at night most of the time. He would urge Natsu to hide in her special corner of her bedroom as he would just sit on his bed in his room and await his punishment. Amaya would always yell at Shoyo that it was his fault his father had passed away. his father had been driving home from work one night when he got a call from Shoyo... Since it had snowed the night before, ice paved the roads. One wrong move and any vehicle would go sliding. However, ignoring all that, his father had answered the call from his son whilst he was driving. It only took one patch of black ice for the car to skid right off the edge of the mountain cliff that led up to the house. Shoyo had remembered the sound so clearly... All he could do was stand frozen with the phone pressed to his ear. Before he knew it, police officers were at the door, and Shoyo’s mom was rushed to hospital in labour just a week later after having a mental breakdown . Amaya’s words never fully sunk in with Shoyo when he was being beaten. She usually repeated the same words over and over again that he would just know what she was exactly saying, even if he wasn’t hearing it anymore. It was like his brain was on autopilot. All he could think was

It’s all my fault it’s all my fault it’s all my fault it’s all my fault.

‘You worthless brat! You are the reason your father died! You can’t even do simple jobs! So many boys at your age can help run shops and all you can do is cook and clean! What are you, a housewife?! If I wanted a house worker that bad I should have just had a female!’

She would also say how Shoyo has it easy, that people his age get beaten all the time for no reason. He should be grateful that he’s being hurt as a result of his own actions. He grew to believe that every bad thing that happened in his life was his fault. That he deserved the dozens of bruises and gashes. They rarely hurt anymore unless he accidentally put too much pressure on certain wounds. He never told a single soul about the abuse or the wounds he had to bear on his own skin. The only person that knew was Natsu, who would do her best to patch up all of the wounds, apologizing that Shoyo had to protect her. It pained him that she felt guilty. It hurt when she cried.

“Listen Natsu... I will protect you forever and ever, it’s just what older siblings do. I promise I will never let mom lay a hand on you, okay? So dry your tears... and go hide for me okay? Don’t come out until I say it’s okay.” He would say this every time to her. Making her promise to not make a sound... To stay hidden in the safety of her bedroom... To put her hands over her ears so she wouldn’t have to hear. At first, she’d refuse... but after a while, she’d nod and run away. Shoyo would always breathe a sigh of relief when he heard the door close behind her.

Once Amaya had finished tolling his punishment, he’d limp to his sister’s room and knock three times, then two, then two again. It was like some sort of code to let her know it was him. When the door opened, Natsu would always give her big brother the best hugs she could at the time. They all weren’t tight because she would fear that she would just hurt Shoyo more. She would still do her best to help her brother along the way... Whether that was sneaking into the kitchen to get ice for a particularly nasty bruise or helping him tie a bandage around a wound that had been opened... Shoyo was always extremely grateful for this and marvelled at how much Natsu had learnt at the small age of 6. Nevertheless he could rest a bit more before the night progressed.

Shoyo was spacing out again in class and was brought back to reality when the bell rang loudly. It was lunchtime, and he had promised Nishioya and Tanaka that he would accompany them. The downside was that he only made lunch for Natsu as they didn’t have much food in the house. He would rather have Natsu be happy than to be hungry. He would be able to get more food on the weekends, but for now, he would have to survive two more days with what little he had at home. Of course, he could ask his senpais for some, but he didn’t want them to waste food on someone like him.

“Shoyo!” Noya called from across the 2nd year’s classroom and basically came in to drag the other to the spot where the three would be sitting together. Tanaka was already there as Noya pointed to where Shoyo would go to sit. “You excited for practice today?” Nota beamed excitedly as he started to open his bento Box. Shoyo nodded and started rummaging in his bag. If he could find anything... a stray energy bar... an apple... anything. He winced internally when his fans fell short inside his bag. Books and a Volleyball kit. Other than that... nothing. Both upperclassmen quickly noticed the missing lunch from Shoyo “where’s your lunch?”

“Oh... I didn’t bring one today. I guess I must have forgotten it at home!” Shoyo said with a large smile plastered across his face. Tanaka dove into his own bag and pulled out an extra pair of chopsticks.

“Here. You can have some of my rice if you want and some tofu...” Hinayana shook his head.

“No no it’s fine guys, I’m also not that hungry today because I ate a lot for dinner last night! Plus I had a big breakfast this morning so...” He said with a fake smile. He couldn’t worry his friends, and he also didn’t want them to give food to him because he just didn’t deserve it. He didn’t deserve any of the kindness that anybody showed him. He was a curse. That’s what his mom had never failed to remind him.

“Whatever you say Hinata, but don’t come crying to us when you can’t practice due to how tired you are.” Tanaka laughed and crossed his arms in a confident way. Shoyo just laughed with his faked bubbly attitude and smiled.

“You bet I won’t do that! I’ll never miss out on practicing, not even for a few minutes!”

Both Noya and Tanaka smiled at the other but also gave their warnings.

“Love that attitude! But remember Shoyo,” Noya started, “if you do need a break for your health, we all will make sure that you get one. Even if we have to do it by force.”

Those words made Shoyo anxious. One wrong move and he could be off the court. He would have to make sure he doesn’t slip up. He rarely does, and even if he did he could make up so many stories on the fly. Everyone believed them, which made him think that if he just faked it all, no one would notice. He didn’t want people to know that he was suffering at all. He just wanted his peers to be happy and rely on him. He didn’t need to burden them all.

Lunch ended pretty swiftly. Perhaps it was the excitement of only having one more class left on his schedule. Either way, the sooner he got onto the court the better he would feel. He was already changed and ready to go before most of the team got there.

“Very enthusiastic Hinata, you seem to be really excited,” Daichi entered the gym with his normal smile followed by Suga and Asahi, who both just smiled warmly.

“Yes! I’m excited for practice today! It’s going to be so much fun!” He cheered.

“It’s just practice, I don’t understand why you would be so excited for something that happens every day,” Tsukishima entered the gym with Yamaguchi trailing behind.

Shoyo didn’t respond verbally, and opted to just rolling his eyes as he saw Kageyama enter the gym and raced up to him, fire in his eyes.

“I bet you 10 meat buns that we are going to hit over 75% of our quick attack!” Kageyama just gave a weird look before having a smug look on his face with his response.

“Fine idiot, I bet we will hit 90% of them!”

“Deal!”

Everyone soon was in the gym, Yachi and Kyoko entered last. While Kyoko was being fawned over by Tanaka and Nishioya, Yachi greeted everyone and prepared for the practice.

“Hey Hinata, Kageyama! There’s a big test coming up right?” Yachi said warmly as she walked over to the duo. Both had forgotten about the test. It was in their English class and it was supposed to cover all of the words and grammar they had learned that month. Both Shoyo and Tobio just stood there and even tried to look away while Yachi panicked. “You guys! You need to pass this test or Takeda would not let you go to Tokyo next week!”

Right, if the two had failed the test they would be put on probation. Shoyo had been looking forward to going to Tokyo so he could see all of his friends and get even stronger. They couldn’t miss it, not at all. He had managed to convince his mom to go on that two-week business trip so he could make it. He had planned it all out so Natsu would be alright as well.

“Yachi you have to help meeee,” he pleaded and gripped Yachi’s hands in a pleading way. Yachi was panicking but tried to explain her situation.

“I can’t help you study this weekend, since I’m visiting my grandparents,! I’m so sorry, but I can hook you up with my other friend Hoshi instead.. She’s super smart so you’ll have no problem in cramming for the test!”

Shoyo had only heard of this friend a couple of times. Her name was Hoshi Nanami. She had fair skin and very long and gorgeous black hair. Not only was she very smart, almost top of her class... but she also very kind. As a first-year, she hadn’t gone unnoticed by a lot of the boys (and even some girls), earning her the title of ‘popular’. Shoyo had crossed her in the halls but that was about it. However, if she could guarantee a good grade, Shoyo was more than happy to have her as a tutor.

“Really!? Yay! You are the best Yachi!” Shoyo cheered.

“No-no, it’s not that big of a deal!” Yachi said flustered, “I’ll give you her number after practice and inform her that you two need help!”

“Thank you so much!”

“It’s not a problem Hinata!”

---

Practice was really fun to Shoyo. He rarely missed any spikes and only messed up on a couple of receives. The best part was, he didn’t get hit in the face once! With kakgeyama serving... it was always best to cover the back of the head. He trusted that he had a good serve that would go over the net and eventually earn them points but right now was practice. Shoyo’s trust in him was thin. First in practice was a drill led by Nishinoya on receiving. Then, everyone practiced serves. After that was the spikes in which both kageyama and sugawara were setters. This really made Shoyo happy since not only could he practice his legendary quick attacks, but he could see whether or not he would win the bet against Karasunos number 9. Practice eventually ended with a series of 3 on 3 matches... in which Shoyo had tried to apply every technique he had learnt in order to beat Tsukishima, Kinnoshita and Daichi. The duo walked over to Yachi and Kiyoko, who were keeping track of all the progress.

“So Kiyoko? How were our attacks?” Shoyo bounced at the taller manager, who looked at her notebook and started doing the math before turning her head up.

“85% accuracy, it’s gotten really better.”

Shoyo cheered loudly and nagged at Kageyama, who just yelled back angrily. “Alright Kageyama, that’s 10 meat buns you need to give me! You can give them to me next week when we get on the bus!”

“Yeah, Yeah... whatever... That’s if you pass your English test you idiot...” The other only grumbled in reply and walked away.

“HEY! You’re failing too you know! And I want those meat buns!” Shoyo called out, before running to catch up with the angry setter. After the gym was all cleaned up and everyone was dismissed, Shoyo ran out quickly. His smiling face instantly turned to panic and seriousness. Practice had gone on for too long and that would mean that Natsu could be in danger. What if mom came home early? Dinner hasn’t even been done yet... Plus Natsu would be home alone with mom... He couldn’t have his sister injured at all. If his mom had managed to get to Natsu, he would feel like an awful older brother.

The ride home was speedy and quick, the adrenaline had kicked in and he had made it home in no time, quickly opening the door and stepped in quickly. He yelled ‘I’m home!’ as loud as he could to try and see what kind of mood his mom was in.

“Shut up Shoyo!” Amaya angrily yelled from the living room. Her tone was filled with venom as she walked over to him. She was obviously drunk, and that meant a lot of pain was to come to him, and hopefully only him. “Why are you home so late? I missed dinner because of your slowness," Amaya grunted as she grabbed Shoyo by the collar.

“I-’m sorry m-mom practice went on fo-for longer than n-normal,” he choked out the words before Amaya threw him to the ground as hard as she could. Shoyo fell heavily and let out a small wince.

“You should have just not gotten into that stupid sport. It only weakens you and makes it so much difficult for us. You should just quit” She yelled angrily as she threw a punch at Shoyo’s face, causing him to bring his arms up in defence. She hit him again and again; even going as far as to throw a few kicks to his ribs too. He winced even more at the pain and felt himself curl in on himself. This was a tactic he had picked up over the years. It made everything hurt less. It still hurt but by curling into a ball, it made it harder for Amaya to hit him. Eventually she got bored though and stopped, huffing and puffing at the loss of energy.

“I need another drink,” Amaya grumbled and walked away as Shoyo got up, not being acknowledged anymore. He made his way upstairs, one hand to his waist, and knocked the familiar code on Natu’s door. The door swung open and revealed the small, orange/haired girl with tears in her eyes. Thankfully, she looked unscathed. Shaky... but still unscathed.

“Did she hurt you Natsu?” Shoyo quickly asked, getting a shake of the other head in response and a wave of relief to wash over the other.

“It souwned wike it hwrt, are you ok Showo?” Her tiredness made her words slur as she has a slight look of fear in her eyes.

“I’m fine Natsu, mom didn’t hurt me,” Shoyo gave the best smile.

“You pwomise?” Natsu asked hesitantly as she walked forward slowly to burrow her head in his stomach. Shoyo smiled tiredly and rested a hand on the back of her head. After a moment, he kneeled down and wiped the tears that threatened to fall down her face.

“I promise it didn’t hurt. See? I’m right as rain.” Natsu nodded before rubbing her eye and going back into her room, wishing the other good night. Shoyo headed in to the washroom to clean up the bruise on his eye. It was starting to swell a little, which wasn’t good. It meant that the others could notice so he would have to make up a story. Maybe I fell off my bike? Yeah that would work... they know I’m pretty clumsy... He thought about it for a moment before wetting a small cloth with cold water and holding it to his cheekbone. He sighed. It was going to be a long week. All he had to do was make sure that he studied hard, passed this test and make sure that Natsu was taken care of. After that it was a long trip to Tokyo and then a whole week of nothing but volleyball. He walked into his room and later down on his bed. Now that he was relaxing, he could feel the ache of his muscles after his beating with Amaya. Usually, he could take it... but lately it had gotten harsher, stronger and more frequent. His fear that Natsu would finally get the same treatment was something that kept him up all night. That’s not going to happen. Everything will be fine. He didn’t even register anything else as his eyes slowly closed, and Shoyo drifted off to sleep.

-

The next morning was like Shoyo had received a punch to the face. Thankfully, Shoyo had remembered to put the arnica cream one of his friends had gotten him from a geography trip to france in middle school. Knowing that he was reckless and serious about volleyball, they had gotten it as a joke... as a playful reminder that he had to be more careful... now Hinata couldn’t have been more grateful for this miracle of a solution that made muscle pain go away overnight. It had even reduce some of the swelling on his cheek.

He knocked quietly on Natsu’s door, which opened almost immediately. She was already dressed. It was a condition that Amaya had insisted. Natsu had to be ready so that when she was leaving for work, she didn’t have to worry about children running around and making a fuss. Shoyo smiled proudly. Natsu had managed to tie her own hair into braids and her uniform looked fairly neat and tidy.

“You ready?” Shoyo asked as she nodded quietly and took his hand in hers. As quietly as they could, they crept downstairs. Amaya was in the bathroom, which meant they had about 15 minutes until she came out and started complaining that she was going to be late. Shoyo reached into the fridge and grabbed the brown lunch bag that was sitting on the top shelf, handing it to Natsu. “Here. I made you a bento box... just how you like it.” Natsu’s eyes widened.

“With egg and rice!? And porc strips!?” Natsu said semi-loudly, to which Shoyo put his finger to his lips quietly. He could see how happy she looked. Lunches usually consisted of stale sandwiches and perhaps a fruit or packet of crisps to go with it. Basic items that were cheap and that Shoyo could make quickly before Amaya came raging downstairs asking for Shoyo to get the hell out of the kitchen. Natsu frowned and looked around her for a second. “Wait... where’s yours?” Shoyo shook his head calmly.

“Don’t worry... I have awesome senpais who are going to treat me to lunch as reward for doing an awesome serve yesterday. I promise you I’m going to eat today.” Shoyo didn’t know if Natsu would buy his blatant lie. Even though she was only six, she was smarter than most of the people in her class. It wouldn’t be hard for her to see through his cracked smile. However, she smiled back and nodded. “Good. Now come on. Let’s get your coat on. Mom will be down in a minute.”

-

The walk to Karasuno high was much more pleasant than Shoyo had thought it would be. His mom seemed to be in a good mood this morning so dropping off Natsu was going to be a piece of cake... Plus it hadn’t rained that night so the roads weren’t slippery at all, meaning less of a hassle riding up and down the mountain. He parked his bike in his usual spot and looked up to the sky. It had a gorgeous orange tint to it... making it look like the sky was on fire. In the brisk air it felt nice. Shoyo looked around and grinned.

“Looks like Kageyama isn’t here yet”. Shoyo slung his bag over his shoulder and began running. Sure, kageyama hadn’t exactly arrived but Shoyo would be damned if he just took it easy. Each foot pounding on the floor felt nice. It was exercise for his achy bones. Sure enough, he heard the familiar sound of his name being called.

“YOU WONT BEAT ME THIS TIME HINATAAAAAA!” Kageyama cried as he matched his pace evenly with the ginger volleyball player.

“What like I did last time? Just try and catch up to me!” He cried back as he upped his pace. Finally, both boys reached the gym, heaving at the lack of oxygen. Shoyo having a mechanical grin plastered onto his face. “Told you I’d win. What is that 56/55?” Kageyama nodded his head bitterly.

“Whatever I’ll get you tomorrow.” He stood up straight and threw a small plastic bag at Shoyo’s feet. “Here. Meat bun. Now I owe you nine.”

“I thought you’d give them to me on the bus...” Shoyo said picking up the meat bun. The smell was delicious. It gave Shoyo half a mind to eat it right now. However, since he hadn’t had any lunch it was probably not the best idea.

“I will. But I was stopping at Coach Ukai’s shop to pick up a jacket I apparently left at the gym yesterday and I was hungry. So I got you one too. Eat it now or later I don’t care.” Kageyama shrugged and opened his up, taking a large bite and chewing it slowly. It surprised him when Shoyo wrapped it up carefully and put it in his bag. With one brow raised, Kageyama did the same to his half eaten meat bun. “So ugh... what happened to your face?”

Shoyo froze and put his hand to his left cheek. He had forgotten about the bruise. All the racing with kageyama had distracted him from the pain he felt in his ribs from yesterday. “Oh uh this? Nothing I just fell off my bike. My tire exploded yesterday on the way back from school. It’s fixed though.” Kageyama nodded.

“Stupid idiot. Can’t you be anymore careful...”

“Hey! I can’t control whether I get a puncture or not!”

“You probably over pumped your tires like an idiot that’s why the exploded!”

“Shut up I did not!”

“Did too!”

“Did not!”

“Did too!”

“Woah... I come to school expecting volleyball players and I get to babies...” kageyama and Shoyo spun around to see sugawara twirling the keys in his hand with a smile on his face. “Seriously where you get the energy from...”

“Morning Suga.” Shoyo said as he picked up his bag and scowled at Kageyama. “Bakeyama lost again today.”

“Hey at least I don’t look like a purple pansy. Next time don’t overpump your tires.” Kageyama followed him in and three his bag towards his locker. It was somehow colder in the changing rooms so neither boy could wait until they got to playing.

“I heard Yachi is setting you up with a tutor Hinata” suga called as the smaller boy got changed. He nodded in response. “Don’t forget to study hard so you both can come to tokyo! You’ve only got two days till the test!” Suga winked and held up his thumb, making both boys smile eagerly.

“Yeah! We’re totally going to ace this test!”

-

“Hinata!”

It wasn’t unusual for Shoyo to space out when in class. Once again he stared out of the window, only to be jolted awake by the sound of his name. His head turned to where the smile came from and smiled eagerly as he saw Nanami Hoshi skip up to his desk. He bowed with his head a small hello.

“Hey Hoshi... how are you?”

“I’m good! I’m good... listen, I heard fro, Yachi-san that you wanted some help in English?” Hinata nodded eagerly. Since he hadn’t eaten this morning, practicing at fully energy had gotten pretty tiring. Instead he stayed quiet and only responded when he needed to. “Great, well I’m free after school until around seven if that’s okay with you?”

“Um, I actually have practice after school so could we study during our free periods? Yachi texted me and said that yours lined up with mine so...” Hoshi blinked a couple of times in surprise before nodding in agreement.

“No that’s practical actually, since you have English just before then so we can go through parts of your homework that you get together so you don’t forget anything.” She picked up Shoyo’s phone of the table. “This is yours right? I’ll give you my number... so if you have any questions you can ask me... or if you know... you want to hang out...”

Shoyo spluttered a little in surprise as he caught the last part of Hoshi’s sentence. “Ugh... are you sure? I mean I don’t want to bother you or anything, Hoshi-”

“Honestly don’t worry about it! I’ve been meaning to do some volunteer work anyway so this is perfect. Oh and call me Nanami! Plus... I’ve always thought you were pretty cute Shoyo-kun...” Shoyo could feel his face go beet-red as she leaned over and put her head on her hands. He could also sense every single student in the classroom staring. “See you later Shoyo!”

“B-bye! Nananami...” Shoyo muttered in embarrassment. Urgh... today is going to be such a long daaaay.... I can’t wait for Tokyo...

[mymusicaljourneyuniverse]

My guest for today is a very dear friend of mine and one of the MVP’s of the Women’s Volleyball Champions League Final Four tournament that took place a month ago in Bucharest. She won the Romanian championship with Metal Galati and with Volei Alba Blaj for several times, she won the championship in Germany and Switzerland. She is an important player for the Romanian national team and she played in the Champions League final. But most of all she is a true friend, a very positive person and great player. I am proud to present to you, my friend and one of my favourite volleyball players in the world, Nneka Onyejekwe.

Nneka, welcome on www.vladpop.com and thank you for accepting to answer my questions. We know each other for many, many year, you know you are one of my favorite players and so, today’s interview is very easy for me as I am talking with a very dear friend. I won’t drag this anymore and I’ll get to it: what does volleyball means for you?

Besides being my job, volleyball is my first true love, it is passion and happiness. Volleyball is what helped me in becoming who I am today: a strong and independent woman.

As most of the great athletes, at one moment during your career you had the chance that one or many trainers focused especially on your developement, seeing you as a very promising and talented player. Who are these coaches and what would you like to say tot hem now?

Ufff, I worked with many coaches so far. The first volleyball lessons I took were with Honorina Borojni (helped by Doina Muresan) and then I was “given” to Zoran Terzic (assisted by Bogdan Paul at that time) that took me to a brand new level. I had Darko as a coach in national team when I was 19-20 years old, if I am not mistaken, and several years later I started to work with him again, in Volei Alba Blaj. One thing is certain though: each and every single coach I had helped me develop into the player and person I am today. I learned a lot from everyone and I tried to take all the positives from them.I would like to thank them for the trust they invested in me. For me, this is all what counts.

People who are not involved in professional sports tend to belive that the life of a professional athlete is extremely cool: good money, road trips, a lot of benefits, fame. How is it seen from the inside?

Being a professional athlete is not easy and unfortunately a very few know what world-class professional sports really mean, besides the good money, fame, the “perfect” life and various countries where you play and you get to see only the airport, the gym and the hotel. I believe that only the family and the close friends know what this professional athlete business means. Sometimes perfect beautiful but sometimes so very hard. Being an athlete means, first of all, making sacrifices. You miss so many important steps in your life but also in the lives of your dear ones because you are sometimes hundreds of kilometres far from home, you have two training sessions each day, one or two matches each week and hotel rooms. Oh, and there is also the national team and so, there goes the holiday you’ve imagined and dreamt of for an entire season. Sports also mean pain. I’ve heard it so many times: “you are extremely healthy as you are an athlete”. Not many know that there are nights when you can barely sleep because your knee hurts, or your shoulder hurts or is it your back? And let’s pretend you can fall asleep somehow, the problem is that you eventually have to get out of bed (at least for me this is a problem) J. As a professional athlete you have to grow into an adult faster than all the other kids/teenagers of your age. Sports mean responsibility but it also means satisfaction. Playing volleyball I met a lot of great persons from whom I learned a lot and I have also made a lot of great friends.

So, when you draw the line, professional sport brings tears to your eyes, most of them tears of joy, at least in my case.

I was lucky enough to see you play a national championship final even since you were at a junior level, in Galati, together with your good friend Sabina Miclea. I have noticed that your friendship with her is still strong. How can you keep such a connection between the two of you, seeing that in the past years the paths of your careers separated you quite much?

I know Sabina since my first volleyball day and we became friends later, I was already in Galati and she was still playing in Cluj. As in any other relationship, friendships have ups and downs but it is important to communicate and we managed that and so, seventeen years later we talk on the phone for hours during the season or hanging out for a coffee when we have holiday and we’re both at home. We do that in order to catch up with every story and not to miss a single fact. Hopefully my kids and hers will get along as great as we do :)))

You are a true globe-trotter. Your career took you so far across Europe to Germany, France, Switzerland. Which are the differences between a club like, let’s say Volero Zurich and Volei Alba Blaj?

I don’t think you can compare the two clubs. And we start talking about budgets again. A very good thing is that the level of Romanian sport is on a rise and that is expressed by the European results Romanian teams had lately. In many sports, not just volleyball. Baby steps but strong steps. There is progress but there is room for more. In professional sports money is very important and I am not talking about players’ contracts or staff’s contracts, I am talking about all the other facilities, the medical facilities to recover after each training session or each match… There is also a sports hall to play in and to train in, a sports hall where you can play important European competitions. In Blaj they are building a sports centre that many teams in Romania only dream of. It is a very important project and I am glad that the people of Blaj will be able to support their team in European matches in Blaj and not in Sibiu anymore.

How was you life being the only Romanian player at a club in western Europe? How did you manage to settle?

The first year was tough on me. New beginnings are always difficult but I got used to it and made a lot of friends in all the countries and places I played in.

You know this blog also has a musical component. So, a couple of musical questions will follow. What songs never miss from you phone’s playlist?

Oooooo, I have many, many songs saved in my phone and many songs that I love. Some of them are:

Queen Bohemian Rhapsody / Metallica- Nothing else matters / Guns n Roses- Don’t cry / Bon Jovi- Always / Beyonce- Halo / Alicia Keys- Empire state of mind / Pink- Family portrait / Sia Unstoppable / Robbie Williams- Angels and the list goes on but I will stop here for the moment.

Is there a favorite song for the pre-matches warm-up moments? Something to boost your energy up?

I have a lot of favourite songs and it highly depends on the mood I am in before a match. I listen to almost everything, from rock to Romanian rap.

What do you listen after the victories? I know that the previous season, your locker room vibrated with Sia’s „Cheap thrills”.

It depends who gets to the speaker first. Usually the one that connects first to the speaker asks the other if they have any special requests.

I know this is a delicate subject and I am ok if you decline to answer the question: where will you play next season? Will you stay in Blaj or we’ll be seeing you playing somewhere else?

I haven’t decided yet where I will play next season. I have a few offers and I want to think it over very well before taking a decision. It is always difficult to make this sort of decisions and I am the kind of person who analyses and chew on a decision for a long time in order to be sure that it is the right decision but an important component is my feeling. There is no bad decision for me and nothing is random. When I will have a decision I will let you know.

I know that for you, family always comes first and I also know that inside your family you have a very strong and special connection between you. How does such a strong and united family cope with the distances between you?

We’ve got used with the distance after all these years. The phones help us keep in touch and we’re very aware of everything that happens in all our lives. It is kind of hard for us to be all together in the same time and we see each other in turns. It is not easy to do family reunions when you have two professional athletes in the family but we’ve managed so far and I know we’ll manage from now on too.

Even though we’ve come a long way, Romania still has some issues when it comes to racial tolerance. I suspect that because of your skin colour and because of your „vintage” Romanian name, you had some problems through the years. Did all the rubbish from people who were not able to see beyond the name and skin colour made you stronger?

When you are a child it feels painful but once you grow up you’re not letting them get to you anymore. I am born in Romania and I am proud that I am part of an interracial family. Only the opinion of those who know me matters to me, they know what kind of person I am and I love them. The only person to whom I must prove every day who I am and what I can be it’s me!

I must admit that every time I watch a match in which you are involved, I am eagerly looking forward to the event’s announcer moment when he has to pronounce your name. Which is the funniest pronunciation you ever heard?

I don’t quite remember but there, in the heat of the moment I amuse my self every time when they get it wrong. Usually, the announcer asks me before the match how should he pronounce it. I heard: “Oneche, Oneueche”. :))))))

Your favourite volleyball player?

Maja Ognjenovic

Your favourite volleyball drill?

Surprisingly for a middle blocker: defence… But I also like to pass the ball and I would have liked to be a setter.

The volleyball drill you need to work on?

I have to work in every aspect of my play. There is always room for improvement.

Your favourite coach?

Hard question. I’ll tell you when we’ll meet next time for a cup of coffee :))

The team you would like to play for one day?

Hmmmm, I haven’t thought of one in particular. I would love to play for one of the top three teams in Italy or Turkey. The level of the championship and the team spirit counts more than the name of the team.

How can you picture yourself when you’re done playing volleyball?

This is the kind of question I’ve been asking myself for quite some time now. I still haven’t found an answer. When I will find it I will let you know. For now I still picture myself on the court playing volleyball.

Favourite free time activities?

I like to listen to music, to read, sometimes to watch a movie but most of the times it is difficult to choose one :)). In my spare time I talk to my family and friends.

A message for your fans?

Kisses and a big THANK YOU!

THE STRONG 18! My guest for today is a very dear friend of mine and one of the MVP's of the Women's Volleyball Champions League Final Four tournament that took place a month ago in Bucharest.

[kellyinboston]

Copenhagen!

Hi everyone. Happy Friday.

Before we get into today’s post – wanted to share two photos:

I made cupcakes for work birthdays.

Snoop’s new corner…we took down her crate and now the place looks so bare!  

Wanted to share some pics from the trip to Sweden and Denmark. I could do a full recap but that would require a lot of time on my end and I don’t feel like wasting my precious time on this blog…just kidding. But, seriously, I don’t have time. So I thought I would show you a ton of pics and caption each picture…how does that sound!

First a little background. I work for a Danish company which requires me to visit our head office in Copenhagen. This was my 3rd trip in six months to Denmark and this was by far the best time I have yet. A couple months ago I was invited to attend the annual P&D Forum at the Denmark office (P&D is People & Development) on June 20th so I was going to head to Denmark the Sunday before but then our entire office was invited to attend an “away day” in Sweden with our Denmark colleagues on Thursday June 15th and Friday, June 16th – resulting in me staying for the weekend to attend the Forum the following Tuesday. Did that make sense – no? Good. Still following? Okay good. Since I was going to be staying in Denmark for the weekend Neil decided to piggyback off my trip and come to visit me and explore the local architecture (spoiler alert – he loved it). So…that is the unnecessary back story.

Our office flew out on Tuesday night and arrived in Copenhagen on Wednesday morning around 6am. We all rested up at the hotel (some went into the office – crazy people) and then a group of us went to do some shopping and explore the city.

It was fun because one my colleagues is from Denmark so she was a great tour guide. After hours of walking/shopping/eating we went back to the hotel for a staff meeting (we were on a business trip after all), after the staff meeting the office went out to eat! I had mac and cheese spring rolls, BBQ ribs and Oreo cheesecake (all very heathy options). After dinner a group us went a bar/pub for another drink then headed home for the night.

On Thursday morning we all loaded into a bus to drive to Sweden.

(I never know where to look with these pics)

When we got to Sweden we attended some work seminars (for lack of a better word) and then cocktail hour started. Let me tell you cocktails, dinner and the dancing was a blast! I stayed out until 3am. Yes, 3am (granted I was probably still on Boston time so 9pm…yeah that sounds about right). My other colleagues stayed out until 4/5am. It was SO fun to get to know other people from our business unit (a few hundred people were in attendance) and I love to dance so A+ night!

On Friday morning we had “team building” activities which consisted of beach volleyball, ultimate Frisbee, paddle boarding, and other outdoor activities that a bunch of hungover people were partaking in. To be honest I felt okay, I pretty much stopped drinking and just danced for the last 2 hours before I went to bed so I was more tired than anything, but getting outside and doing physical activity actually made me feel better! I was a on a team with 6 other guys, they were very nice. Our last activity was paddle boarding and we needed 4 group members to do it and only 3 volunteered. I did not want to do it but I did it and failed miserably, but the other members were super nice about it! It was a fun morning!

We headed back to Copenhagen around 2pm and got back to our hotel at 4 and then a group of us headed to this outdoor food market and Freetown Christiania (is a self-proclaimed autonomous neighborhood of about 850 residents). This food market was so cool, I got a brisket sandwich with French fries and it was tasty.

(the view to the bathrooms at this food market, super interesting, shared bathroom space - both men and women)  

The whole vibe was fun. Freetown Christiania – how do I describe this place. It was a bit odd but very cool…definitely glad I went and explored (Neil and I went back a couple days later). I kept calling it the “lawless city” – interesting place to visit with coworkers.

On Saturday most of my colleagues flew home, Neil got in around noon, took a nap and then we promptly went out to explore.

(super frizzy hair!!!)

I cannot remember where we went…definitely to look at buildings, a lot of buildings. We went to this outdoor water space/urban water park (not sure how to describe it) but it was super cool.

This is the first time I have been to Copenhagen when it was nice and warm out and the city comes alive. It is really cool. After walking for like 4 hours we met some of my colleagues who stayed (for various work reasons) for dinner.

On Sunday we slept in big time and then went out exploring some more.

A lot of walking this weekend. We explore some more buildings, I took Neil to the lawless city, we walked up a big hill to look at a cool power plant (I think that is what is was), relaxed by the water, grabbed some dinner at the outdoor food market and settled in for the night. We were exhausted!

On Monday and Tuesday I had to go in to the office, so Neil used my work phone (b/c I have international service on that phone) and went all over Copenhagen. I swear there are 250+ pictures on my phone of buildings. He was very impressed with the city and the architecture and thoroughly enjoyed himself. I was sad to miss it (no, that is a joke, I can appreciate buildings but not spend hours looking at them…sorry Neil!).

On Wednesday we flew back (separate flights because we are super important and cannot fly together just in case the plane goes down). I got in town a few hours before Neil (direct flight v. layover), we went to Costco and then got ready for the rest of the week.

It was such a fun trip. It was fun to hang out with the people I work with (who I actually like) and to have Neil come was icing on the cake. I know sometimes I complain about traveling all the time – I do know I am fortunate to be able to travel to cool places (for both work and pleasure), but I am happy to be home the next few weekends!

Thanks for reading!

(remember how I said I was just going to do captions for each photo…obviously didn’t do that)