#i really want janus or patton to be aro

[a-small-batch-of-dragons]

Needy

A 5 + 1 fic where it’s 5 times the other sides suspect Roman is touch-starved, and 1 time they do something about it. – monkeythefander

Thomas is having a really bad executive dysfunction/burnout day, and it's affecting Logan & Roman the most as his executive function Sides. Everyone ends up in a giant cuddle pile to rest with each other as Thomas learns some self-care. Maybe some gentle bullying into said resting by Janus. Some Remus-classic hug attack & him comforting Roman bc brotherly love. They're all too tired and foggy to care about what they're supposed to be doing (sans Logan & Roman, bc. self-worth issues). Maybe a kinda loopy/tired Janus or Virgil gets possessive over Thomathy like a Mama Hen. No pressure to write this! (/gen) Remember to take care of yourself & rest when ya need to <3 – anon

Hey so if you're doing request and would like to, I was wondering if you'd be willing to write something with aro Roman who still wants a 'romantic' relationship? Maybe with him struggling with internalised arophobia about it and one of the other sides helping him overcome that maybe? Showing that he's still able to have relationships like he wants without feeling romantic attraction and stuff? This might be worded really badly and for that I apologize -w- Even if you don't do this (which is completely fine feel free to ignore me) you should know your writing is absolutely amazing - never fails to make me smile <3 - Princey

Read on Ao3

Warnings: touch starved, internalized arophobia

Pairings: none

Word Count: 5377

Logan will be honest: it is not something he has given extensive thought to, nor did he deem it something worth paying attention to in the grand scheme of things. Simply because, well, he didn't believe it was possible. Roman, touch starved? The prince was more likely to sweep any of them into a ballroom dance at a moment's notice than to deprive himself of something so simple as touch. The very idea was counterintuitive to Logan's fundamental understanding of Roman to begin with. But after this morning… Or, five times the Sides thought Roman could be touch-starved, and the one time they did something about it

 

Logan will be honest: it is not something he has given extensive thought to, nor did he deem it something worth paying attention to in the grand scheme of things. Simply because, well, he didn't believe it was possible. Roman, touch starved? The prince was more likely to sweep any of them into a ballroom dance at a moment's notice than to deprive himself of something so simple as touch. The very idea was counterintuitive to Logan's fundamental understanding of Roman to begin with.

But after this morning…

It had not been a good morning, admittedly. Thomas had little to no executive function, leaving both him and Roman metaphorically drowning in their own issues. He'd gone over every single notebook he could find, trying to locate some guide to dealing with this, surely this could not be the first time such a thing had occurred, and therefore he must have made some note about what was happening and how to fix it. But tearing his room apart—figuratively speaking—hadn't yielded anything more than a ball of frustration in his chest that refused to unwind and a torn notebook cover. Then, of course, Janus and Virgil happened upon him as he struggled to refill his water bottle and the rest, as they say, is history.

Never let it be said that the two of them aren't determined, he'd thought as he was unceremoniously sunk into the living room to be surrounded by pillows and blankets. A slightly loopy Patton had beamed at him, holding his arms out for cuddles and Janus had none-too-gently hinted that he'd be forced into relaxing whether he liked it or not. And yes, he could admit it felt nice to be held, especially when the others had so quickly joined them on the couch to watch mindless animal documentaries and game show episodes.

But then…well, then he'd noticed that Roman was missing.

Struggling upwards through the fog in his brain, he'd managed to mumble something along the lines of where's Creativity, for Remus was missing too, and Janus had quickly stood up to go look. Logan had tried to get up as well, only for Virgil and Patton to flop on top of him and render him quite motionless. Then Virgil had begun to card his hand through his hair and he lost all ability to focus on anything other than the gentle scratching sensation. He'd only managed to rouse himself from his daze when three more bodies appeared.

"Hey, it's okay, Roro, just come lie down."

"But I have to—we can't just stop, I can't—something's wrong with me—"

The genuine hurt and panic in Roman's voice had cut through the worst of Logan's brain fog and he'd sat up, looking over to see Remus barely restraining Roman with a sheet wrapped around him. Janus was on his other side, trying to reach out too, only for Roman to jerk and whimper every time his hands made contact with the sheet.

"Sweetie, it's okay," he murmurs instead, "one day off isn't going to make or break anything. You need to rest, pushing yourself more now won't help anything. No one's going to be angry at you for taking some time to rest."

Roman's gaze had darted around frantically, finally landing on Logan in the midst of being swaddled by Patton and Virgil. Something had undone itself then, his shoulders sagging as Remus finally coaxed him down to lean against the base of the couch. He'd bent close to mutter something, his hand reaching up to brush Roman's cheek, and Roman had flinched.

It hadn't been large enough for Janus to notice, nor did Remus seem to be surprised by it, but it was there. And for the life of him, Logan hadn't been able to figure out why. Not until he'd noticed that after that, Remus was careful to only touch him through the sheet, and that he never ventured close enough for anyone else to lay a hand on him.

That afternoon, when the worst of the fog began to lift, he'd thought about it again. He'd reached a conclusion that surprised him, so much so that he began to doubt it almost immediately.

Roman couldn't be touch starved, could he?

 

Virgil won't ever claim that he's the nicest to Roman, but he doesn't always go out of his way to be a jerk to him. Case in point: when he notices Roman starts getting scared every time one of them except for Remus gets close enough to accidentally bump into him, he doesn't start trying to get close to Princey on purpose.

He's concerned as hell, though, don't get him wrong. Roman's not exactly what you'd call a shy person, nor is he immune to the general theater kid-ism of getting swept up in dramatic monologues to the point where he's willing to drag people along with him. And most of the time if he's going to touch one of them, he's the one initiating it. Hugs, slaps on the back or the shoulder, high-fives, all of it. It's not like Princey's suddenly gone and declared a no-touchy zone around himself.

But Virgil knows what he's feeling.

He knows the stab of something icy cold in his gut when Patton runs at Roman to give him a hug. He knows the prickle of his skin when Janus leans close to whisper in Roman's ear. He knows the momentary lurch when Logan sits close enough that their arms brush. He knows the tensing of shoulders and the drop in his chest when he goes to ruffle Princey's hair. He knows the shudder when Remus knocks against him. Roman is scared, and what's worse is that Virgil has no idea what he's scared of.

Roman isn't the type of person to just take something lying down, not when it's actually, truly scaring him. Sure, he doesn't speak up all the time when one of them hurts his feelings, and he's long since stopped pretending he can tell when Roman's being honest about whether he wants to do something or Thomas wants to do something—honestly, he's not sure J can tell anymore either—but if something's really, honestly scaring him? Virgil's been sat down and told he can't hide in certain caves in the Imagination because it makes Roman freak out that he might've been gotten by something, or that he can't jump off the cliffs by the ocean anymore because the depth isn't always constant and it gives Roman a heart attack. Not in that way where it's like he's being scolded by a parent—no offense, Pop Star—but in that genuine way of hey, please don't do this, you're scaring me, and he'd said yes every single time.

Which is why this is so confusing. It's not like it's just one person, it's all of them. It's not like Roman's handling it well—well, he might be, if none of the others have noticed what's going on—and it's especially not like he's getting any better. The only thing he can think of is that Roman's suddenly developed this aversion to being touched, but that can't be it either.

Why would Roman have problems with being touched?

 

Patton's been feeling cold lately.

Not himself, not in the way where he needs to go put on his fluffiest sweater and huddle under the blankets with a cup of hot chocolate, but there's a part of his chest that's never really warm anymore. It's beginning to worry him, because that's the part that feels when one of his kiddos is upset.

But who would be cold? Janus is the obvious guess, but he's always wearing at least three layers, gloves, and spends most of his time alone under his heat lamp being a happy little snake puddle. He's also been seen scolding the others for not wearing enough outside or for letting themselves forget to do things like move and ask for help if they need it. So it's probably not Janus.

Logan, then, because for as much as he claims to be sensible, he has a terrible habit of believing himself impervious to some of the things in the Mindscape. Object impermanence, he says, when he's about to walk into a freezing Imagination without a coat. Roman helped scold him out of the worst of that, though, especially when Logan got hurt that one time he tried to look for Roman during a brutal rainstorm.

Virgil? Not likely either. He's never seen without that big hoodie and he's always scrunching himself into little corners and huddling under blankets and making a show of how warm he is. That could be a cover for how cold he actually is, but they've come such a long way from those days. He can still remember what it feels like when Virgil's not comfortable around them, and it's not the same.

Remus, then, but that doesn't feel right either. True, he doesn't have as good a handle on Remus's feelings as he does some of the others, but there's something achingly familiar about this cold. Something that makes it feel like he should know it, or at the very least, know what to do about it.

Which leaves Roman.

As soon as he puts name to it, the cold pulses. He puts a hand to his chest and closes his eyes, feeling the dull pain of swallowing an ice cube make itself at home in his ribs. He lies back on his bed, pulling the blankets over himself, trying to figure out why Roman feels so, so cold. Is he upset about something? Did a project not go the way he wanted it to? But Roman wasn't the type to be silent about things going wrong with his work, not like this. And it wasn't like him to be quietly cold either—he can still vividly picture the look on Janus's face when Roman came and flopped down next to him under the sun on the Imagination's rock plateau, or snuggling up under the blankets during the winter. Sure, he was a bit of a furnace himself, but that didn't mean he didn't get cold too. But this wasn't that type of cold, this one was deeper, in his bones, in his soul. As though he could be snuggled up under every kind of blanket, in the hottest desert in the world, and still, he might shiver. The kind where being inside a bonfire wouldn't help at all.

Why was Roman so cold?

 

Janus is concerned about Roman. That sentence has run the full circle of 'being concerned that Roman will mess up his plans' to 'something is wrong with the Mindscape's dear little prince and that's concerning.' Right now, however, he's a little too preoccupied to consider the irony.

Is he proud of the fact that he's snooped in on Roman while he's working on his own projects? No. Is he willing to admit that he's done so to someone like, say, Remus, who's already threatened him half a dozen times against doing that very thing? Not likely. Would he risk it anyway because what he's found out is making him worried?

Yes. Yes, he is.

He's not stupid enough to go intrude while Roman's actively in the Imagination, but he is willing to use the trick Remus taught him to investigate further. For the double doors leading into the Imagination, there's a little button on the underside of one of the handles that takes you to wherever the last person went. So, it's a simple matter of waiting for Roman to come back—through his own door, which is difficult enough to recognize—and then going to see where he went last.

He opens the door into a quiet forest. Fireflies twinkle in the dark green leaves, a deep blue sky opening up just above the treetops. A little ways down a dirt path, he sees a simple wooden cabin with a porch swing out front. He walks towards it slowly, footsteps crunching along the path. Just as he gets to the base of the steps, the door opens and a young man looks out.

"Evening," he says, "you're an awfully long way from the village, stranger."

"My apologies for intruding. I only saw a friend come this way and wondered where he'd gotten off to."

"Friend? Ah, you must be a friend of the prince's. Yes, you've just missed him, sorry to say, he's gone off that way."

"I see." Janus looks him up and down. A perfectly ordinary man, bearded chin turning up as he smiles. "I'm sure you can understand my unwillingness to just take your word for it."

"No, I understand. I can assure you I mean your friend no harm." He closes the door and comes down the steps, taking a seat and motioning for Janus to do the same. "He's been coming here for, oh, I'm not sure I can remember. Quite a while now."

"And what is it you do?"

"Talk, mostly. He helps me tend to the garden around the back—I told him it wasn't my place to accept the help of a prince and he told me not to think of him as the prince, then." He huffs a laugh. "He's a very thoughtful man, your friend."

"He is."

The man looks up at the stars for a moment, before he turns to Janus. "Forgive my questioning, but as his friend, I must confess, I am worried about him."

Janus sits up. "Oh?"

"I offered him payment, of course, or some form of compensation for helping me, but he refused all except for one thing." Here he shifts. "Tell me, if it's not too much, has the prince always been…cold?"

"Cold? How do you mean?"

"The only thing he would accept or request from me is touch. An embrace, or something so small as a hand on his shoulder. I have offered him a seat at my table for a warm meal and he treats it as though it is the finest of offerings from a neighboring kingdom." The man's expression grows more worried still. "In the winters, when I can hardly send him off into the night, he knows he has a place in my bed, but he—"

"Oh, he does, does he?"

The man gives him an almost scolding look. "Not like that. My dwelling is humble but the bed is warm and we are not creatures to deny the warmth of another. But he reacts as though I had given him riches when they are but simple touches."

Janus is quiet for a long moment. Roman sneaks in here to…what, to cuddle? To be touched? To enjoy companionship so simple and pure it belongs in some fairy tale? And then to have to be coaxed into it, reassured that it is freely offered, even if under the guise of huddling together for warmth.

"I didn't know it was like this," he says eventually, "and I thank you for being able to provide him some comfort. Stubborn man often refuses to take it."

"That I know. Would you permit me, if it is not too rude, to ask if you could see that his needs are better met?" He gestures around them. "There is only so much I can do."

"I will do my best."

"Thank you, stranger," the man says and rests his hand on Janus's shoulder.

And Janus wants to weep. Because this isn't touch. The man's hand feels scarcely more substantial than a piece of tissue paper resting atop his cloak. There's no warmth, no solidity, hardly anything more than a whisper of a promise that comes from seeing the hand there and knowing there must be some form of sensation to go with it.

If all Roman is subsisting on are touches like this, what must an actual touch feel like to him?

 

Remus knows his brother is touch starved. He's furious about it.

Because there's only so much he can do by himself, only so many times he can tackle his brother to the bed and smother him with cuddles, and Roman doesn't let him do it where anyone else could see. Why? Because Roman's terrified of being needy, that's why, and apparently letting himself be comforted in the way he needs to be comforted is a bad thing all of a sudden. Doesn't matter that Virgil needs to be squished back into his own body sometimes, doesn't matter that Logan keeps reminding them that they're social animals who need to spend time together, nope, none of that matters. What matters is that Roman is scared of letting them know he actually wants something and that means Remus has to bully his brother into letting him cuddle him because hey, guess what, he loves his brother and that means he's gonna take care of him.

He's not actually mad at Roman. No, it's not Roro's fault he's scared. It's not his fault that far too much of the meetings and Thomas working through things has come off as Roman not being allowed to want things just for the sake of wanting them. Ro's too good for that. He's too good at being quiet about stuff he actually needs, never mind the fact that if Roman actually told them what it was he really wanted, they'd never believe him. Because come on, a hug? A cuddle? Just the ability to say I need a hug and get one without any sort of teasing or mocking? Since when did Roman dream so small?

It wasn't small. That was the problem. To Roman, it's everything.

He didn't end up following through on his promise when Janus confessed what he'd done, only in part because he already looked so distraught that anything else wouldn't have done anything. No, Janus telling him about the cabin with the sweet man who just wanted to make sure Ro was okay made Remus cry out of sheer frustration. Because he's all too familiar with how insubstantial Imagination creations can be, especially when it's to supplement something like actual physical contact. And Roman, his sweet, stupid, sappy brother, was never going to be able to get by with Imagination touch alone.

Not to discount the man in the cabin. Remus has met him a few times, he's really a sweet guy. But that's partly because the Imagination knows Ro, the same way it knows Remus, and so it tries to give him the things he needs in between giving him all the things he wants too.

And apparently, what Roman needs is someone kind, patient, sweet, and caring enough to give him the physical affection he won't dare tell anyone else he's starved for.

So yeah. Remus is pissed.

+1.

It's the most humiliating thing in the world, to want to be special.

To want to have someone look at you out of everyone in the room and say that one, you, yes, I want you. To be the exception. To just be something a little bit different from everything else. To be the one for whom they have a soft spot.

A single room. A bed or a chair or a rug on the floor. A window or no window at all. A fireplace, lit or unlit. A door in the back, open or closed. Quiet footsteps or loud footsteps crossing the room, a blanket or a coat draped over shoulders as another body lowers itself. There you are or you look cold or a soft hum or nothing at all. Arms wrapping gently about shoulders or waists or just brushing against each other. Gentle kisses to the crown of the head or the temple or the cheek, or no kisses at all. Murmurings or soft worried questions or knowing silences. Warmth, always warmth. Warmth and solidity and endless unspoken affection.

Cuddled in a too-big bed with gentle whispers and firm touches. Surprised by a hug from behind, a teasing kiss pressed to a shoulder. Spotted across the room and a smile, arms opening, the come here spoken or unspoken and no less clear in either.

Yes, a humiliating thing indeed.

How can you ask to want to be special? How can you look someone in the face and tell them you care not for the work it takes to grow so close? How can you ask them to give you a place in their hearts when you don't want to give them one in yours, not in the same way? How can you want something that you could never fully appreciate, because you could never see yourself giving the same to someone else?

Give me this, you say, I want it. I want to know what it feels like.

Will you give it back to me, they say, if I give it to you?

You can't. You don't know how. You aren't capable of it. That's for other people, people who do know how to do it. It's better for them to be that for each other, after all, and not for you. You don't get that. You won't ever get it. How could you ever hope to be that kind of special? How could you ever hope for someone to choose you? What do you have that they couldn't get, a thousand times over, in someone else?

You can be liked. You can even be loved. But you will never be chosen.

It is easier, then, a voice whispers in the back of your head, to not have at all. Why would you chase crumbs when you could eat by yourself? You needn't hide under their tables. You could eat on your own. You could have your own food.

And so you do. You make your own and you smell the aromas wafting from their tables and you bite down on your own bland creations. You like them, you do, but sometimes you get a glimpse of what sorts of things they eat and your mouth waters but your stomach never grows any hungrier. You fill your mind with the thought of how good it must taste, what you imagine it to taste like. You wrap your arms around yourself and imagine a full, content stomach. You imagine someone noticing when you get a little hungry and bringing you something they think you might like to eat. But you will never be someone's first choice of dinner companion.

You watch the hugs and touches and kisses and you imagine what it might be like to be a vessel for such affection. You do not position yourself close enough to catch the runoff from the fountain because that will only make it clear how empty you are. You sit bone dry on a nearby shelf and take comfort in the shade for it reminds you of how cool the water must feel. And when it is dark and the fountain has shut off for the night, you think of how it would feel to have someone pour in the cool, gentle water until it laps against the lip at the top. Perfectly filled, just for you. It won't be, it won't ever be, but in the cool of the dark you imagine it could.

You will only be special to the things that you make to treat you as special. They give you some relief, the flat words on pieces of paper describing how badly you wish to be cherished or nourished. The phantoms you conjure in your own imagination whose only purpose is to love you, absent of the realities of touch and only there to give you the idea of it. You tell yourself a thousand stories of being loved, being cared for, being chosen and that never makes it any more real.

You take the humiliation of wanting to be special and bundle it into a cloak, wrapping it about your fragile chest as though the shame of it would deign to warm you.

***

"Is this really how you feel, Ro?"

Roman doesn't look up, the choked voice coming out of Remus enough to let him know how his brother is feeling. He shrugs, wrapping his arms tighter around himself as Remus sniffles. "I just…yeah."

"You're allowed to want stuff, Ro, especially if it's how you want to be cared for."

"But it's not—it's not fair. I can't—I can't do that, so I can't—how can I ask someone to give me something when they're not gonna get anything out of it?"

"Because it's not like they wouldn't get anything out of it." Roman turns away, face burning with shame, humiliation, a cocktail of the two, and the paper rustles as Remus puts it down. "Okay, okay, think of it this way: I ask you to do stuff for me to help ground me and pull me out of spirals, right?"

"Yeah?"

"I don't do that for you."

"Yes, you do."

"Right, but I don't do the same thing. I love you and support you in the way that you need it."

"But I can't—how can I ask someone to get into a relationship with me when I'm never gonna feel like that for them? That's what most people talk about! They feel unloved and it makes them sad and they—and then they break up and I can't hurt someone like that, Re, I can't—"

"Shh, shh, hey, hey, Roro." Remus is up and out of the chair and Roman's shrinking back before he even touches him. "I'm not—okay, I won't touch you."

He relaxes a tiny bit.

"You care about people," Remus continues, "you care a lot about people. And you're really good at making them feel cared about. You know how many times one of the others comes up to me because they can't find you to tell you how much they appreciate you? 'Cause it's a lot, Ro-bro, it's a whole hell of a lot."

Roman peeks out at Remus. He's on his knees near Roman's chair. "Really?"

"Yeah, really. They care so much about you, Roro. They want to care about you. So badly. Do you have any idea how much we've—god, no, you don't. You don't know."

"Know what?"

Remus sighs heavily. "Janus followed you to the cabin a few weeks ago."

Roman freezes.

Then he panics and because he panics, Virgil shows up. And because he can't tell Virgil the truth, Janus shows up. And because the two of them just disappeared out of nowhere, Patton and Logan show up to see what's going on. And now all of them are here and his soul is scrawled out on a piece of paper right there and Remus is reaching up to try and touch him and—

Everything stutters to a stop when warm, solid, real hands cup his face.

"Ro," comes Remus's voice, past the muffled everything of the world, "it's okay. I'm telling you it's okay. We're all worried, Roro, that's all this is. See? Everyone's just worried."

He blinks through the panicked fog to see concern written plainly across each of their faces. But the warmth won't let him think and soon he's squeezing his eyes shut again, a mortifying noise leaving his throat.

"Come let us help you," Remus is saying, "come get cuddles and kisses and everything, okay? It's okay, Roro, it's okay."

And because Roman is weak and stupid and already humiliated, he nods.

"Thank fuck," he hears distantly before there are strong, solid arms around him, hefting him up out of the chair like he weighs nothing, "hey, Princey, shh-shh-shh, it's just me, it's just Virgil."

Virgil carries him over to something soft, something else warm opening its arms to meet them. He's lowered against something else warm and solid and smelling faintly of sunflowers and there's a real kiss against his cheek.

"Sweet prince," he hears, and his mind belatedly supplies Janus, "sweet, dear prince, oh, you poor thing…you're so cold, sweetie."

"Come here, come get him under the blankets." Patton, his fading brain gives him as the faint smell of fresh cookies surrounds him with warmth, "hey, baby, it's okay. We're gonna look after you now, okay?"

Everything is too much. Everything is too much and too warm and too real and too good and Roman can't have this, he can't have this, he's being selfish, he's being awful, he's going to end up hurting someone, especially himself, and then something cool and dark falls across his face and another kiss brushes the spot just behind his ear.

"Breathe," Logan's deep voice instructs, a hand running up and down his back, "breathe, Roman."

His breath comes in great, whooping gasps, but he's breathing. A hand slips down to rest over his stomach and he near sobs with the relief of it.

"Hush, it's alright, we won't go anywhere until you're feeling much better. Just focus on us, alright? Can you do that, my dear?"

Roman will do anything if Logan keeps speaking to him so tenderly. He does his best to block out the thoughts swirling around and around, instead trying to feel the puff of Logan's breath against his cheek, the warmth of his hand on his stomach, the weight of Patton adjusting the blanket, the way Virgil's hand cards through his hair, one of his hands held in several of Janus's. He takes one deep breath in, then another, then another, and the sobs leave him with a foreign softness.

"You're doing so well, sweetheart," Patton murmurs, "so well."

"It's bad," Virgil says, more to the others than to him, "he's really out of it. He's gonna need a lot of support going forward."

"Oh, no," Janus teases, "whatever shall we do? Cuddle our sweet prince until he feels better? Tell him how much we care for him? I couldn't imagine a worse fate."

"Shush," Logan scolds, far too fond to be a true indictment before he kisses Roman's forehead, "now's not the time for jokes. Roman needs our help still."

"He's overwhelmed." Remus shuffles up close to him, pressing his side against Roman's. "Let him go to sleep about it."

"Do you need to sleep, little one? That's alright, shh, yes, that's it, close your eyes, now…sleep, my dear, we'll be here when you wake up."

Deep in the Imagination, a bird carries a letter to a little wooden cabin. A man opens the door and takes the letter, smiling as he reads what's written upon it.

He will be taken care of. Thank you.

"It is my pleasure, as always," he says, and he knows somehow the prince will hear it, "and you are always welcome to come back."

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[i-am-bitterly-jittery]

Follow Your Aro

The aromantic follow up to Perfectly Normal

Word count: 871

Rating: gen

Pairings: platonic Dukeceit, platonic or pre-qpr Intrumoxiety, background Roloceit and Moxiety

Warnings: self discovery

In honor of Aro Week (next week, Feb 18-24) I’ve written a companion to my projecting ace on Remus 💚💚🤍🩶🖤 ♠️

~~~START~~~

“JANUS!” Remus yelled as he threw open the door to his and Janus’s shared dorm room. 

“Hello Remus,” Janus said without looking up from the assignment on his desk. “I’m sure the other people in our building are really appreciating your volume, thank you.”

“Any time, Snakey!” Remus grinned, throwing himself onto his roommate’s bed despite being three feet away. “Hey, I have a question.”

“I would love to help you at this exact moment, Rem, I definitely don’t have to finish this assignment before my date with Roman and Logan tonight.”

“Perfect! What are romantic feelings?”

Janus set his pencil down and turned to face Remus with an arched eyebrow. “They’re the feelings you have for a romantic partner? Are you okay?”

“Noooo,” Remus whined, sitting up and pouting. “I know what they are! I mean, like, how do you know you’re feeling them?”

“Oh…” Janus blushed. “It’s like, when you’re alone, and all you can think about is them. Or when you’re having a bad day, but when you see them, you think ‘oh, there they are’. They’re just… it’s so nice to be around them.”

“But that just sounds like friendship!” Remus huffed, flopping back onto Janus’s bed and glaring at the ceiling. “How do you know it’s different than friendship?”

“I don’t want to kiss my friends,” Janus deadpanned. “No offense.”

“Ew, none taken,” Remus stuck his tongue out at the thought of kissing Janus. “But I don’t want to kiss anyone.”

“I don’t know what to tell you, Rem.”

“Eh, I’ll probably figure it out when it becomes important,” Remus shrugged. 

“Sure,” Janus agreed distractedly, focusing once more on his assignment. 

~•~•~

It hits Remus like a wrecking ball two years later.

He placed his game controller down on his desk, shut his console off, and walked away. He didn’t save the game, but it was okay, he wasn’t ever going to play it again. 

Downstairs, he found Patton sitting on the couch in front of a DVD menu screen, so he threw himself onto the couch and buried his face in Patton’s lap. 

“Everything okay, kiddo?” Patton asked, only mildly shocked from the intrusion after having been friends with Remus for nine years. 

Remus just let out a long, loud groan. 

“That’s okay,” Patton said, rubbing his hand along Remus’s back comfortingly. 

“You’re in my spot,” Virgil complained, coming back from the kitchen with what smelled like a bowl of popcorn. Remus didn’t move. 

“That’s okay, honey,” Patton said. “There’s plenty of room over here.”

The couch dipped as Virgil sat down on Patton's other side. Virgil poked at Remus’s head with his fingers, but Remus didn’t react other than to groan again. 

After a moment, the movie began playing, and no one spoke further. Patton’s hand continued rubbing along Remus’s back, and eventually, Virgil’s hand found its way into Remus’s hair.

Remus fell asleep like that. 

He woke up some time later. Virgil’s hand was no longer in his hair, but Patton’s hand was still on his back — though it had now stilled — and the movie was still playing. 

Remus sat up groggily. 

“How ya feeling, kiddo?” Patton asked quietly. Virgil was sleeping with his head on Patton’s shoulder. 

“Fine,” Remus croaked. “Better.”

“That’s good,” Patton smiled. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“I was playing a video game, and it was making me feel icky, and I realized I’m aromantic.”

“You just realized you’re aromantic?” Virgil asked incredulously without opening his eyes. 

“Shh,” Patton shushed, petting Virgil’s head. “I’m sorry your game made you feel icky, Re, what happened?”

“It made me pick a character to date, and then it made me have an awkward conversation with a different character who liked me.”

“Gross.” Virgil agreed, hating any awkward NPC interaction video games forced on him. 

“Do you want to pick the next movie?” Patton offered, gesturing at the end credits scrolling across the screen. 

Remus perked up and jumped to his feet to pick out a movie from the house DVD before realizing something. “I’m crashing your Valentine's plans, aren’t I?”

“No,” Virgil answered immediately. 

“We like having you here, kiddo,” Patton smiled, patting the space Remus had just vacated on the couch. 

“Really?” Remus asked skeptically. Patton was way too nice to ever kick anyone out, even if he was trying to have a nice date with his boyfriend. 

“Really! We would have watched movies in our room if we weren’t okay with you joining us!”

That was a fair point, no matter how many lectures on the effects of watching TV at bedtime Logan gave, Patton and Virgil continued to have a TV in their room so they could watch movies alone when Virge was feeling too peopled-out. 

“Pick a movie and sit down.” Somehow, Virgil’s grumpiness was even more convincing than Patton’s cheeriness. 

Remus popped Coraline into the DVD player and happily joined Virgil and Patton back on the couch. 

“But seriously,” Virgil said after several minutes where Remus had thought he’d gone back to sleep. “How did you just figure out you’re aromantic? Should I have told you?”

“I’m not that obvious!” Remus sniffed indignantly. 

“Sure.” The eye roll was practically audible. “Whatever you say, Re.”

~~~END~~~

I spent several years trying to figure out if I was aromantic or not, but I couldn’t figure out what romantic feelings were (which honestly should have been a hint) so it took a video game forcing me to date an NPC to go “I still don’t really get what romantic feelings are, but they’re def gross”

Anyway I now avoid any video game that involves potential romance

General taglist:

@royalty-of-all-things-snuggly @pixelated-pineapple @arsonic-knight @misunderstood-shadowling

[pencilpat]

what are you’re headcanons for Virgil? 💜

Of course anon!

Virgil loves DIY! He made his own hoodie, he is a typical alt kid mending and patching things from the thrift store. I think that, while emo is his favourite fashion and music type, he also really loves goth music and style.

The dark side fallout happened right before Accepting Anxiety rather than after. Janus had plans about showing Thomas all the repressed aspects of himself even back then, and Virgil was the easiest to grapple with, so he was sent out on the front lines. He wasn't supposed to bond with everyone. He wasn't supposed to become friends, family, with someone else, with the others. And after tension built and built and Janus's abandonment fears consumed him, it just collapsed into a fight. Virgil decided that, really, no one wants him at all, and all he does is hurt and inconvenience every other side. So he ducked out. You know the story from there.

Virgil and Roman are only recently getting along better but they're trying. Virgil's love language is sharing his interests, and he tries to find crossovers between things they enjoy. Roman struggles with that because in his view there isn't much overlap at all. Most of their hangouts involve rewatching Nightmare Before Christmas over and over. But also! Makeup!! They do each other's makeup for fun alllll of the time. Also making clothing for each other!

THIS SIDE IS AROACEAPL!! Virgil is so aroaceapl coded to me, or at least demiromantic/demisexual and friendship neutral aplatonic. He never seems to enjoy the words 'I love you' or any implication of love being given to him. He doesn't seem to enjoy relationships in general, though he has let exceptions happen. Virgil seems very romance repulsed for himself but the second it's for Thomas's romantic life he is out to battle as Bravery for the sake of that anxious man's heart.

Speaking of, Logan is also VERY aroaceapl coded and in my mind they are in a queer romantic relationship, they love each other in a way that doesn't make sense as any currently known type of 'love'. They need each other and they make each other feel nice - Logan is someone that Virgil genuinely likes to be around, which is rare for him. They get each other's struggles and I think they could talk each other down from anything. And neither of them could ask for anything better than someone who understands.

Patton is also someone Virgil has felt love for. At first both of them mainly thought it was a familial bond, but given both of theirs' issues with comprehending romantic feelings, it was soon found to be more. Attraction gets very complicated when you're aro, ace, and aplatonic. It can be so confusing when you do like someone, and you'll often try to categorize them as something different like family or community. Virgil being demiromantic and Patton being aro confused and muddled things. But they really just care about each other either way, and they just let themselves... be. To just care for each other in whatever way they can in the moment and leave their feelings undisclosed.

Vee-man's favourite bands are MCR, All-Time Low, and A Day To Remember, but he's not as pure of an emo as you'd expect. That modern day tiktok emo music? He is a sucker for that stuff. And I want to kick his ass for it.

When they were a kid, Virgil was only known as Fear and he was a little shadow person. Like a tiny boogeyman! Really, the personification of what a kid finds scary rather than his current being made of all those adult worries. He age regresses for stress reasons and reverts to that form when doing so.

That's what I can think of right now, like with the Roman post I'll edit if I think of any more later.

[brandstifter-sys]

Hiding Eyes

For @dukexietyweek Day 7: Soulmate            (Ao3) (login required)

Word Count:2797

Rating: T

Characters: Remus, fem Patton, fem Janus, Virgil

Warnings: mtf Virgil, genderbend, background moceit, sex mention, alcohol

In a world where you have one of your soulmate's eyes and can see what they're seeing if you cover your borrowed eye, it should be easy to find your soulmate. Unless you can't see anything when you try and get a look. Remus, a movie star, is unfortunate that he can't see anything. He's ready to give up hope until a chance meeting at his oldest friend's drag show.

---

Sometimes it was hard to look for a soulmate even though they had one of your eyes. If they covered the borrowed eye they could see what you were looking at. For Remus, it was a lot harder to tell. 

He was happy to be finished with his latest movie and wanted to either sleep or get smashed. At least this one wasn't some trashy romcom where he'd have to play straight. It was a trashy macabre romcom where he had to play bi, Cthulhu in Love , and he was the lead! He was just glad that he didn't have to sit in makeup for hours to get his face tentacles done that day and instead just put on a fake beard to match his mustache. And he had the next day off!

Remus carefully removed the color contact from his right eye and closed his eyes. All he could see was darkness but it was nice, sometimes the light was too much. He sighed, not bothering to just cover his right eye to catch a glimpse of his soulmate's world. He never saw anything. Sometimes he wondered if he even had a soulmate. 

He wouldn't be surprised if he didn't, he was aro and he didn't really want to enter some one-sided romance if he could help it. But it would be nice to at least see who got stuck with him. He knew he was a lot to handle. 

"Hey, Remus?" someone called to him from the other side of the door. Remus got up with a grunt and opened it to reveal his costar, Pat, and she looked worn out. 

"What's up Patty-cake?" he asked and leaned against the door frame. 

"Sorry if I'm bothering you, I just thought you might want to get some dinner and see Janice's performance tonight," Pat said and played with her hoodie strings. Remus couldn't really say no, he wanted to see his childhood bestie's drag performance even if she spent the rest of the night with her soulmate. 

"Give me five minutes to get dressed and then we can party!" he grinned, "If you want to watch me strip you can come in!" Pat shook her head and smiled sweetly. 

"I'm spoken for. I'll be here when you're ready!" 

"One of us has to be," Remus shrugged. 

"You have a soulmate, little mister, and I will fight you if you say you don't!" 

"You can't win on an empty stomach!" Remus jeered, "And Jan would get off seeing you beat me up!" 

"Remus," she scowled and adjusted her glasses. 

"I'll be right out!"

.

Remus was incognito, hiding his skunky bangs with a beanie and his body in a hoodie and baggy pants. Pat wasn't as hidden as they entered the bar, reeking of McDonald's. It wasn't terribly crowded, but still full and dimly lit. Remus could see the low stage and the lights. It would be a good show. 

"If you save me a seat, I'll get the drinks," Remus suggested. 

"Okay, can you get me a Hemingway Champagne, please?" she said brightly. Remus ruffled her hair and laughed before sauntering to the bar. 

Remus moved like he was the hottest thing in the world and leaned against the bar with a winning smile. The bartender got one look at him in his bum attire and sighed. She was pretty, with long purple hair that covered her right eye and half of her glasses. She had deathly pale skin that looked more pallid paired with her black hoodie. 

"Hey there gorgeous!" Remus cooed and motioned her over. She moved towards him reluctantly and crossed her arms. 

"I thought I told you I'm not doing it. I'm not falling for it." 

"Falling for what?" 

"Don't play dumb, Roman. A fake mustache and a pale blue color contact are not going to convince me that you're Remus." 

"So you know the boring theater twin!" Remus laughed, "I'm sorry for you, girl!" The bartender's visible eye went wide and she shook her head. 

"I'm not going to kill him, I'm not going to kill him," she sighed as her cheeks turned pink.

"That's my job! And here I thought Roman didn't have hot friends!" 

"Are you gonna order or waste my time?" she huffed. 

"Can I get a Death in the Afternoon and Alligator Sperm? And if you have to spit in one, aim for the gator! Pattycake doesn't deserve my hate," Remus said brightly before he noticed her eye. It was the same brown-green hazel as his. 

"Anything else or do you need to stay sober for your next shoot?" 

"That's all for now. How did you know I'm shooting a new movie?" 

"Jan. She always gushes about her soulmate being a movie star and working with you all the time. I haven't told anyone if you're trying to keep an industry secret or something," she shrugged, not exactly telling the whole truth, but Remus couldn't be sure.

"It's not really a secret, just not well known. I'm sure it's all over my fan pages! I can't hide from them, not that I want to—they're why I have what I do." 

"It's not because you have talent or anything," she scoffed and rolled her eyes. Remus snickered and bobbed his head back and forth.

"Talent? Half the time I don't even speak in my fun movies! It's my hot bod and creepy mannerisms that sell those! I mean it was the fans that petitioned for me to play the creature in Frankenstein. I wasn't considered since I'm not a tall brooding goth prince, but it's my best performance, and I have the fans to thank for that."

"You were better in Cuttle as a tentacle monster. Even if the fanart got weird. I needed to bleach my eyes." 

"Is that why you cover your soul eye?" 

"I keep one eye covered because it's light sensitive, because of genetics," she said flatly and got to work on the drinks, avoiding eye contact.

"Do you put eyeshadow and liner on both sides?" Remus asked. She moved her bangs to reveal that she had an eye patch on her glasses. 

"There's no point. Anything else or are you going to give your friend her drink?" 

"Oh Pat! Right! We're both here for Janice, or should I say, Dante Infernal! You got me there! Can I get your name before I go? Hot bartender isn't a good name." 

"Violetta, but you can call me Vi," she said shyly and slid him both drinks. Remus beamed and took them. 

"Thanks! I like that name! Maybe I'll see you around!" he said and trotted off to find Pat. 

Of course, when he found her, she was with Janice in a more secluded booth, giggling and flirting with the drag king. It was so easy for Dante Infernal to charm anyone with his wry smirk and gentlemanly wiles. It was cute but Remus was not interested in third wheeling just yet. He was too sober to deal with any romance. 

"Should I get you a second straw to share?" he teased and set her drink on the table. Pat giggled and beamed at him. 

"Thank you so much Ree!" 

"Hello Remus, I'm surprised you haven't snapped anyone up yet," Janice teased. Remus shrugged and took a swig of his curdling drink. 

"I just got here, give me some time!" he laughed, "And maybe I want to be a good friend first!" Janice chuckled as he downed the rest of his drink. 

"So you're going to give me a few dollars and sulk at the bar this time?" she hummed knowingly as Pat sipped her drink. 

"Maybe," he pouted, "As long as the hot bartender doesn't get tired of me!" 

"Violetta? Oh, darling, if she figures out you're you, you might get tired of her . She's a huge fan of your horror movies, and your butt." 

"Really? I mean my ass is perfect but she didn't seem interested in it! She's got the big tiddy goth girlfriend vibe so it checks out that she'd like those movies!" 

"She certainly does, even before her top surgery she was gifted," Janice said bitterly. 

"Your tiny titties are cute!" Pat cooed and hugged her. Jan nuzzled her hair and kissed her cheek. Remus blinked and stared at them both. He was still too sober for this.

"I'm gonna go back and get another drink." 

"Remus, don't drink too much, okay?" Pat pouted. Remus flicked his wrist at her and pulled a few bills from his pocket. 

"Don't have too much rockin sex, okay?" he retorted and handed the money to Jan. She knew that meant he wouldn't be close by when she performed. She also knew that Pat was flustered, so she waved Remus off to do whatever he was planning. 

Remus waved impishly and went back to the bar, this time hopping on a stool and setting his empty glass down. Vi glanced at him and sighed. 

"Finished already?" 

"Yeah, can I get another one?" he asked and wiggled his eyebrows as she took the glass. 

"Not for a while. I'm not letting you get drunk, pretty boy. Your romcom fans will eat you alive." 

"I'd rather my horror fans did. Literally!" he jeered, "You know you want to!" 

"Do I?" she asked and set the glass on a tray to go through the wash.

"Well you've got Jennifer's body, so why not enjoy a snack?" 

"What?" she snorted and turned around.

"Is your name Megan because damn you're foxy!" Remus purred with a goofy grin. 

"Shouldn't you save that for your soulmate?" she said with a snicker. Remus wanted to hear her laugh more. 

"I don't think I have one, I'm aro and I don't see anything when I do the eye thing," he said with a shrug, "I don't mind. If I had one, they'd have to deal with the paparazzi, my schedule, and me!" 

"Being aro doesn't mean you don't have a soulmate, I can tell you that much. Blind people exist. And maybe don't treat yourself like a problem. It doesn't help anyone," Vi replied and leaned on the bar across from him. 

"I'm a lot to handle, but I'm a lot of sexy fun too," Remus giggled, "So you're aro spec, huh? And you have a soulmate?" 

"Yeah, but the universe hates me so I don't look anymore. They're only interested in men. But you're not here to listen to my problems." 

"I don't mind, I'm curious—what idiot wouldn't want a babe like you?" he said and held his chin in his hands. 

"Some idiot I knew of in school who's in the film industry now. Roman thinks you might know them, I'm pretty sure you do." 

"Can I see your other eye? It could help me figure out who they could be. And I kinda just want to see both eyes." 

"I'm gonna regret this," Vi sighed and moved her bangs. She lowered her glasses and bit her lip, trying not to squeeze her eyes shut in the dim light. 

Remus gasped when he saw that familiar pale blue iris staring at him. He slapped his hand over his right eye and saw a blurry version of himself gawking and covering his eye. His hand fell to his side and he shook with so much excitement he had no idea how to release it.

"Remus?" Vi asked hesitantly and readjusted her glasses. She was regretting that choice. 

She yelped when he grabbed her face and kissed her like he would die without her lips. 

"Holy shit!" Vi gasped and lurched back. Her lips were tingling and she was staring at Remus in shock. 

"I know I should've asked first," he said softly, "I wasn't thinking." 

"But you—" 

"Love is love, no matter how romantic or platonic or alterous. And I could see myself falling headfirst in a vat of battery acid for you, no romance required." 

"You don't have to do that," she said with a shy laugh. Remus beamed, proud that he could bring that sound out of her. 

"So we went to school together, and you were too shy to say anything to me, huh?" 

"You were—are so confident and bold, and you had friends, it was intimidating, and I was really just a nobody with self esteem issues and I avoided you as much as I could. The easiest way to do that was spending time with Roman." 

"Hmm, well it would be really funny if you were the hot emo who always had headphones and a spiderweb backpack! I had such a mesh it was embarrassing!" 

"Oh god," Vi groaned and went bright red, "I still have that backpack." 

"Okay now I definitely need your number and I need to take you on a date!" Remus laughed, "I can be covert if you like!" 

"Please? I don't need the paparazzi tearing into me because I'm an edgy trans woman." 

"The only one tearing into you is gonna be me!" Remus jeered. Vi shook her head and readjusted herself. 

"Go watch the show, my shift is over in five so I'll find you, before Jan can rub it in," Vi said, "And don't think you're gonna be the one tearing into anyone." 

"I'm looking forward to proving Pat right! And getting to know you!" Remus grinned and waved impishly before trotting off to join his co-star. 

Unfortunately for Remus, he missed Janice's performance, but he was able to take his seat by the lovers without drawing attention to himself. 

"There you are, Remus," Jan hummed and ran her fingers through Pat's hair, "finally tired of your biggest fan?" 

"Nope! I just wanted to check in on you and tell you that I owe Pattycake a puppy!" 

"You found your soulmate!" Pat gasped and sat up. Remus nodded excitedly with a bright grin. Pat squeaked and hugged him, far too excited to contain herself. 

"Did you meet them or did you finally see something?" Pat squealed, "Do you know what they look like? Are they handsome?" 

"Darling, let him breathe," Janus hummed, "One question at a time." 

"I finally got to see and I met my soulmate," Remus giggled and shimmied excitedly. Pat was so happy, hanging off his every word. Jan was more interested in the figure looming towards them. 

"And she is the most beautiful woman with the most sultry voice and she could burn me alive with her stare!" Remus gushed, and swooned, leaning into the seat, "And I want her to step on me."

"That's no way to describe someone to your witnesses," Vi said and sat next to Remus. Remus leaned against her and beamed. 

"Well, this is an unexpected twist," Jan hummed with a smirk. Vi flipped her off and flipped her hair over her shoulder. 

"Sounds like you expected it," Remus giggled and wrapped his arm around Vi. She leaned against him and placed her hand on his thigh.

"I did, but I didn't expect you to be so, adoring," Jan hummed. Remus shrugged. 

"It's not romantic adoration, it's all about power, beauty, the macabre, personal connection, and lust!" 

"Lust?" Pat squeaked and inched closer to Jan.

"I'm a horny little bastard!" Remus giggled, "And it takes a lot to tame me!" 

"I doubt it," Vi jeered.

"You would be the first to say that!" Remus jeered. 

"Wait until your brother hears!" Pat gasped, looking for any reason to change the topic. 

"He's known since high school. He'll be insufferable," Vi sighed, "More insufferable than Remus' rabid fans who hate his soulmate because he's not theirs and he won't ever see them like that." 

"They what?" Remus gasped. 

"They're usually kids. They get over it. Online I actually like to claim that yes, your soulmate is a raging bitch who would whip you and make you beg for the tiniest scrap of love," Vi said with a tiny smirk. 

"You shouldn't be so mean to yourself, and you shouldn't lie just to belittle yourself either," Pat pouted. Vi shrugged and glanced at Remus. He was fighting back a fit of giggles.

"I'm not lying," she said softly. Remus' jaw dropped before a gleeful giggle escaped him. 

"You really are my soulmate! Please tell me you have more than just whips and begging in mind!" he squealed and kissed her cheek, pulling her closer. 

"I'll tell you more about it when we go on a real date." 

"There's a nice diner that Jan and I go to, it's quaint and it doesn't have a pretty face, and it's open 24/7," Pat suggested. 

"Are you free tonight?" Remus asked.

"No. I'm supposed to be going to a diner with my soulmate," Vi teased. Remus laughed brightly. Yeah, he was more than happy with his soulmate.

[staledirt87]

These are my designs for the sides in the other human!au I mentioned in the tags of my last post:

Info under the cut:

Janus does have a hat I just forgot to draw it I'm sorry I realized after I had digitalized it.

Janus and Virgil are in high school in this au, they're not dating yet but they do get together eventually. They met Remus in the park while skipping class (Virgil was on the verge of an attack and the teacher was putting him on the spot) and Remus becomes a sort of guardian father figure to the both of them. Whenever any of the teens are having a bad day they go to the park and Remus always cheers them up, sometimes in questionably legal ways (trespassing, graffiti, shoplifting from chain businesses).

One day when they're all having a particularly bad day Remus offers to have a "spa day" which entails going to Remus' place and DIYing their hair. The hair ends up fine but Remus' bathroom does not.

Virgil meets the light sides when he's skipping school (didn't feel like talking to Remus and Janus was taking a test that period) and goes to a random cafe. Logan sees him and notes the time, realizing that hey, you should be in school. Logan points this out, and Virgil just flips him the bird. Patton comes over and diffuses the situation, asking why Virgil was skipping school. He shrugs and deflects the question, asking why they're so invested in a random teen. That's when Roman comes over with the drinks they ordered and sits confidently across from Virgil, handing him a black coffee.

Virgil's says he's not gonna pay him back and Roman replies that the reason he's here is payment enough. Patton protests but Virgil just sighs and concedes (English was too rowdy and loud). Having Logan as a friend they all understand. After that every time Virgil got overwhelmed and just wanted to chill he went to the cafe.

One day Janus comes with Virgil to the cafe and it turns out him and Logan had already met. Apparently Janus sometimes goes to the college the light sides go to and participates in the debate club. Logan heads that club and hates every time Janus shows up because he purposely chooses the losing side and wins by tripping up his opponent. Janus is the also the head of the Speech and Debate club in the high school and gets bored with the other teenagers and terrorizes college students instead. At the cafe Logan points at Janus just like "YOU" and Janus feigns ignorance.

After that hiccup it becomes a 50/50 chance for the teens to go either to the park or the cafe, to the point Remus is like "bro where are you guys half the time." Janus invites him to the cafe and this time it's Roman that has the "YOU" moment when Remus walks in and surpise! They're twins. It's a bit awkward because apparently Remus hasn't contacted Roman in like two years but they get over it.

Time for some random scenes I had in mind:

Logan is experiencing some heavy sensory overload so Virgil gives him his noise cancelling headphones.

At a pride parade Janus and Logan tag-team homophobes harassing people as Remus dirty dances next to them.

Remus and Roman become the wingmen from hell for the teens when it's evident they're both far too dense to realize their mutual pining.

Somehow the dark sides convince everyone else to do a horror movie marathon on Remus' shitty laptop and Roman and Patton have nightmares for weeks.

Roman gets into a musical and the other five are toeing the line between obnoxious and supportive the entire time.

They play mindtrap and Logan almost loses it with the ridiculous answers. Janus, who has all the answers memorized and is acting as if he's getting them logically is reveling in everyone's frustration. Virgil knows Janus has them memorized but doesn't care to tell anyone.

Not really a scene but info I think is important: Virgil is gay and ace, Janus is NB and gay, Remus is aro bisexual, Logan is bi and ace, Patton is FtM and gay, Roman is pansexual, and Logan, Patton, and Roman are all in a poly.

Random Facts:

Janus does have heterochromia, he just also puts a colored contact lense in the blue eye.

Janus has a pet snake named Alex so he can say stupid shit like "I forgot to close the lid to his cage properly so Alex got out and hid under the couch."

Patton and Roman work at the cafe they hang out at, Logan comes over to study and to spend time with them. Patton makes the pastries and Roman makes the coffees.

Logan is majoring in Astronomy with a focus on galaxy formation, Roman is majoring in Theater and Acting, and Patton isn't in college.

Remus gave keys to Janus and Virgil so now whenever he comes home from his job (probably a sex worker or stripper) he has to watch out for Virgil sleeping on the floor.

The best prank Remus ever did was sneak Virgil and Janus into the poly's shared apartment before knocking on their door. Roman's shriek and Logan's string of curses in several different languages when they saw Virgil sitting ominously on the counter will forever be worth it. Nothing will ever be better though than when Patton walked out to see what the commotion was and Janus grabbed his ankle from under the table he was hiding under. The first and only time they ever heard Patton threaten someone with violence.

[anxiouslyfred]

No Longer Playing House

I told myself when I wrote these prompts that I would complete this week and by Remus I'm going to manage it, brain constantly exhausted or not, everything a short as hell bullet fic or not

This is for @aro-sides-week prompt of found family

Patton getting cleared to adopt after a long fight for it and trying to fit all his friends into family roles

Logan immediately questions this, and why he's somehow implied to be Patton's partner despite them not being together and him being alloaro while Patton's aroace

Needless to say the kid,( because lets face it, although Patton would probably love to raise a baby, he'd get attached to some precocious child in a foster home if ever advised to visit one.) gets very amused by them arguing and after a comment by Logan about being more suited to a teacher than any familial role in a child's life starts calling him Mr Logan.

Virgil also argues twice over, because Patton decides he should be the kids older brother. He is not Patton's son and refuses to let the man make him so at all, and ignoring that, they're already found family. That does not to any extent mean they have to fit these roles Patton has in his head, it just means they're people important to each other, who want to look after each other in their ways.

Roman... goes along with it. He loves the idea, especially when he's chosen as an uncle to the child, claiming he'll be the coolest. He only starts questioning it when Patton declares Remus to be the cousin they do everything to avoid influencing the child.

This was a group brought together because for various identities the normal relationship wouldn't work, and they were happy with it.

Janus at least gets Patton to drop the entire thing with a very snide "Wow, thanks Patton, I would just adore being an aunt to your child, encouraging the very suffocating amatonormative family structure we all wanted to escape. Is this your way of convincing two alloace's they should date, because I really believe Roman and I know our relationship to each other better than you."

That gets Patton stopped in his tracks. He looks from Janus to whichever of their friends are said at this time and stutters out an attempt to deny that,

"You're right, I might have a kid now. but we're family and there's no need for a structure of that. Sorry guys. Guess I just caught up in the idea of making a home like I always played house as a kid."

"Fuck social structures! That's what Remus told me!" The kid cheers at that, getting groans or laughter from everyone, even as Patton scolds them for language and listening to Remus.

[t4tprinzzy]

*ahem*

roman: this prince is sooooo hard to define <3 is he transfem? transmasc? idk but he really likes he/him either way. also it/its. they/them pronouns are the bane of its existence tho. also regardless of whether he’s transfem or transmasc he is a lesbian. lesboy roman my beloved <3 OH and loveless aromantic. obviously. but it’s not asexual

remus: honestly i dont have any set headcanons for him, but i loove the idea of remus being the opposite of roman because the idea of them trading genders warms my heart lmao (so if roman is transmasc, remus is transfem. and vice versa). i also love the idea of agender remus. and gender hoarder remus. and she’s ace you can’t change my mind (but not aro, they’re definitely gay ace and calls himself a “sexless faggot” kajddkfk) (obligatory disclaimer: i know aces can have sex, remus just doesn’t. she prefers to watch :))

janus: agender, maybe demiboy? he calls himself “10% boy 90% snake” lmao. he doesn’t mind they/them but doesn’t exactly use those pronouns? if that makes sense? same with she/her, but when he’s feeling dysphoric he doesn’t wanna be she/her’d so it’s best to ask first. as far as sexuality he calls himself gay but isn’t really sure and doesn’t really care to figure it out. he’s also loveless, but not necessarily aromantic (but who knows really. janus def doesn’t ksjdkfkfkf)

patton: bigenderrrr holy shit. that is a girlboy momdad right there i believe this with my whole chest tiddies and all. he views his two genders as his two kids in a way and nurtures both of them <3 idk if that makes sense but it makes sense to me. he’s also bisexual aromantic, or maybe bi oriented aroace? i just know his attraction isn’t limited to men ok hear me out

virgil: agender. they fear gender. and pronouns. genderphobic agender jajdjdkfkf they don’t want anything to do with it trust me. they’re also aroace because they fear intimacyKAJDJDJFFK

logan: honestly it’s so hard to come up with genders for this guy. it’s reached the point where i dont think he worries about labels, even though i guarantee he’s obsessed with finding the right labels and drives himself insane (same girl). maybe he tried finding a gender label that fits only to realize it doesn’t matter too much and just settled on the word queer. or maybe he’s catgender idk. even sexuality labels are difficult like who is this guy attracted to other than virgil KAJDJDJFKFKF like????? oh, well,,,,, he definitely wants janus to **** *** ****… or he wants to **** janus’s ***** i can’t tell. what was the point of this post again

sorry to post this after pride month but i do not control the ,,,,,, gay

[darth-does-stuff]

its ramble time. also yeah this is gonna be p long (hence the word - rambles) and prob talking a lot about patton and janus because i havent talked about them much and i have IDEAS

(also i know i want remy to be involved somehow but i havent figured out how yet. suggestions welcome ghjghjgs)

so thomas and logan are elves, roman remus and virgil are magic users (witches warlocks wizards whatever the word is lmao), remus specializes in wind magic, roman in fire, and virgil in weather. 

the magic virgil uses is often called chaos magic and in order for something to be generally classified as chaos magic, it needs to be unusual/rare, chaotic (duh) or unpredictable, and destructive. (these classifications might change as i think on them more). wind magic is largely argued upon whether it is chaos magic or not, seeing as how it is largely unpredictable and can be seen as destructive, but it doesnt fit the bill with the first one, leading to the arguments. same with fire magic, but they said it was too common for it to be chaos magic. virgil having weather magic means that he can create storms, sandstorms, generate lightning, windstorms, and also able to control (or rather ‘bend’) rain. of course, there are drawbacks and limitations, adding to the fact that virgil has a very hard time controlling his magic and harnessing it, he is not op dw. magic is also very much tied to emotions btw

also ro re and vee have two moms and they are a lesbian couple sorry i dont make the rules

elven lore and shit time - while gold is rare in many places in the fantasy land (i still have yet to decide on a name), in the elven land (i have not decided names for each section either lmao) iron and steel are actually harder to find than gold. gold still holds its own worth, but iron and steel are generally regarded as superior in worth than gold, which is why many nobles possess the material. and ive already explained the left eye crest thing with the elves, their left eye has a shape or crest to it along with a color that glows slightly. the glow can be dimmer or brighter depending on their emotions at the time. logan has a diamond shape to his left eye and a leaf green glow to it, which also happens to be his eye color as well. thomas’ is a heart and rainbow color and glow, while his actual eye color is an almond brown. ill discuss appearances in another post btw. anyways, the elven lifestyle is the most similar to humans, having a battleschool, its system nd shit, etc. although it does differ in terms of ‘rulers’. the humans have a monarchy while the elves rule through a council of 9. (an odd number so there arent any ties) logan uses both a sword and a bow as his weapons of choice. thomas was forced to go to battleschool so he basically just dips as soon as he can after teaching logan what he knows and becomes a healer because HEALER THOMAS 

PATTON AND JANUS TIME PATTON AND JANUS TIME PATTON AND JA

 patton is one of the merfolk, who (in this au) are a species that have two forms. their mer form, where the lower half of them is the mer tail fish tail what the fuck is it called. anyways the color of pattons tail (wtf is it dude) is a desaturated light blue. he has these like ??? spikes?? is that the word? jutting out from his forearms. (at the very least pointy things) and he will not hesitate to use them as weapons. yeah he’s a feral boy. he has some spots of scales on his upper body but they are pretty scarce. in his human form, he just looks like a human i dunno what you expected lmao. in the water his eyes are a really potent blue while on land they are much duller. he can also breathe underwater regardless of the form. patton also cant really will himself to either form, if he wants to be human form he has to be on land and vice versa for the mer form.

janus is a fucking uh,, dude idk the word for it. i guess the general word for it would be dragon but he’s more humanoid than dragon. a cross between the two ig. anyways he has scales on one side of his face, scaly wings because fuck yeah, horns jutting out from his forehead, and more shit that i have forgotten but i know he has it. the scales are a golden color, with warm yellows and light oranges mixed in. left eye has a dragon pupil type thing, like a slitted pupil. fuck i hate describing things ghdgakhgask. im playing around with the idea that dragons can shapeshift but nothing is set in stone with that tbh. most dragon folk are like janus, a mix between dragon and human, and only the really powerful ones are the ones that can actually turn into dragons so thats pretty rare. but fuck descriptions its time for fucking FRIENDSHIP and FAMILY

janus has a little brother whose name is emile and they are 6 and actually pretty shy. it took them a while to warm up to patton but now he literally loves pat and everytime he sees them he bolts over and just gives him a huge hug. patton tries to act all tough but he is so soft for emile there is no denying it and they all know it. jan and emile have an agender parent and a genderfluid parent. agender parent uses xe/xem btw. 

patton has a mother and never knew his father. he and his mother have a rather,,, distant relationship i suppose. his mother is in the royal guard so she is called away often (though it does not excuse the neglect in the slightest) her and pat just mutually acknowledge that they both exist and go about their day. one day pat confessed to jan that he never really felt that they were his mom, more just a person who birthed him. one time in a particular bout of drowsiness, patton confessed that janus and his family were the ones that he truly considered family. janus got choked up and was like ‘shut up you bastard im supposed to be tough /pos’ 

the first time janus showed him how he could get rid of the dragon aspects of himself for a limited time, patton literally took one look at his human form and shouted ‘what the FUCK’ and janus was like ‘IVE SEEN YOU CHANGE FORM BEFORE WHATS YOUR DEAL’ and patton just screams ‘THIS IS FUCKIN WEIRD’ (all /lh) janus and patton get up to so many shenanigans its a wonder they havent gotten caught yet lmao

patton, once again in sleep deprivation cause thats the only fuckin time he’ll confess anything about his emotions, told janus that he was his first friend and that he was so scared to mess it up when they first became friends. he’d spent most of his life alone and always in this state of just,,, perpetual anger, bubbling right underneath the surface with no way to escape. it led to him getting in a lot of fights and just lashing out, especially at people who tried to become his friend, scaring them away. when janus came along and stayed, he said it was the best thing that ever happened to him. he finally had a friend. even when he lashed out and retreated back into himself, putting up those walls again, janus still stayed. he helped break those walls down bit by bit, helped patton with his anger issues, helped patton realize that janus was here to stay, and that he wasnt leaving.

if you cant tell, i love them sm ghdgaskgjs

[lily-janus]

Feelings Never Make Sense

Summary: Remus' story... with a bit of Patton.

Pairing: queerplatonic intruality

Warnings: self depreciation, thinking you're wrong and broken, crying, kinda meeting cute but not quite. I think that's it.

Word count: 2,681

So I'm dumb and it's day 2 already apperantly lol. This one is one of my fave that I wrote so far, hope you like it too!

@aro-sides-week day 2 queerplatonic

......

"Thank you, Janus for sharing and providing an amazing start to our meeting." Patton smiled at him, he doesn't know him very well but he can't help but feel deep sympathy for people like him who had such a hard time figuring themselves out, god knows he was there himself…

He turned his smile for the rest of the circle. "Who wants to go next? Remember this is a safe place but you don't have to share anything if you don't want to-"

"Ooh! Me! Mememe!" Remus shot his hand into the air, grinning eagerly and jumping in his seat.

Patton giggled fondly at him. "Alright Remus, I already know your story of course but you're more than welcome to share it to the rest of us."

"Yes!" Remus whooped in triumph and stood up to face the rest of the circle, walking over to stand next to Patton and lay his weight on his shoulder. "Just like me, my life was pretty much a mess before I met sweet cheeks over here." He started.

Patton giggled again. "Remus, be serious please." He chided him, still giggling.

Remus sighed exaggeratedly. "Fiiine." He cleared his throat and started his story.

-------------------------------------------------------

"I don't love you anymore." Remus blurted as he took a sip from his drink and staffed another pastry in his mouth.

Jaxon squinted their eyes. "What?!" They said in shock. "What the hell, asshole?! You can't just say things like that! I love your weird and random humor and all but this is not a joke, it's not funny!" They slammed their hands on the table, attracting some of the other costumor's attention.

Remus gulped, he didn't think much before he said that, huh? "It's not a joke, Jax, I'm serious."

That did not help with Jaxon's mood. "What do you mean? You just swore to me that you're in love with me like, yesterday!" They yelled, a deep hurt evident in their voice. "Did you just lie to me and now suddenly decided I'm not worth the effort? Do I mean nothing to you?"

"No! I really was in love with you! I… I guess it's just… Changed. It can happen sometimes, right? It happened to me before I… I was just sure it was going to last this time…" Remus sighed before plastering a grin on his face. "But we can still be friends right?"

Jaxon was just gaping at him, their eyes filled with shock, hurt and anger. "Changed?! Are you serious?! That's not how this works, jerk!" He stood up and Remus caught a sight of tears in their eyes before they ran out of the cafe'.

Remus sighed, burying his head in his hands and pulling on his hair in frustration. Jaxon's words echo in his mind, that's… this isn't how this works? But… It always worked that way for him… was there, was there something wrong with him?

That's it, he needs a drink asap. He quickly paid for their order and went to find the nearest bar.

The noise was so loud it drowned out all of Remus' thoughts, perfect. He went to sit on one of the stools and waved for the bartender to take his order, when he approached he just asked for their strongest drink but he choked on his first sip when his eyes landed on, probably, the most gorgeous man alive.

He had short, blond hair, blue eyes that sparkled in the dim lighting, tiny freckles that dotted his cheeks and the most endearing smile Remus has ever seen plastered on his face as he drank by himself.

Remus was half way into jumping towards him and tasting his full, soft lips, before stopping himself. The events of this morning and countless other similar things that happened to him playing again in his mind.

Was this another fleeting crush? Was he going to wake up tomorrow in this man's bed and realize those strong emotions he could have sworn he felt now were gone? Is he going to break his heart and hurt another person?

Remus swallowed hard and walked back to his seat, putting his hands on the counter and staring at his drink, trying to shove away the image of the perfect man sitting just a few stools away from him. But he utterly failed, and while he was somewhat able to contain himself from physically going over to him, he couldn't help staring. He was honestly breathtaking, unfairly so.

Eventually though, the man noticed and started to walk towards Remus on his own accord. Fuck, he was so scerewed… not even in the fun way, just utterly fucked and screwed-

"Hey there"

Remus jumped a few good feet in the air and turned around towards the man. Oh fuck! That endearing smile was now on Remus. He swallowed hard again.

"H-hi." He managed somehow.

"Did you want anything? I saw you shoot glances at me um… may I sit here?" The man fumbled awkwardly.

Holy shit, he acted cute too, Remus was in big trouble, huge trouble. "Y-yeah! Of course!"

The man sat down and offered his hand. "Name's Patton." He smiled brightly at him.

"R-Remus." He shook the man's hand, palm sweaty.

The ma- Patton cocked his head a little, brow furrowing with worry, blue eyes scanning him intently behind his square glasses. "What's on your mind, buddy?" He finally asked gently.

Remus giggled nervously, ignoring his question and tearing his eyes away from him to finally gulp down his drink.

Then Patton hesitantly laid his hand on his shoulder and Remus jumped a little. "Shoot, sorry. It's just… Well, obviously I don't know anything about you… yet at least… but, I know a thing or two about um… avoiding? Less than pleasant emotions." Patton laughed a little. "I'm oversharing again huh? But I'm all ears if you wanna talk about whatever's troubling you, can't promise I'll have the best advice but sometimes just having someone listen can help." He shrugged with a small smile.

Oh shit, Patton made him feel like falling into his chest sobbing and spilling all his life's problems to him. And they were just talking for… what? 5 minutes? Maybe less? This guy is too good.

"You should leave."

The words were out of his mouth before he can think better of it, which isn't new to him, he rarely thinks before he speaks or acts.

The sparkle in Patton's eyes dimmed a little and he looked down. "Oh… right, I get it, you don't know me and I was being too invasive again…" he sighed as he started to get up.

Remus' heart clenched. "No! You did nothing wrong! I'm wrong." He clarified. "I just don't want to hurt you… you know, like I do to everyone I meet." He stared at his empty glass, refusing to meet Patton's eyes.

"What do you mean 'I'm wrong'?" Patton questioned gently. Fuck, why does he has to be so gentle and sympathetic and… Fucking amazing?

Remus just shrugged. "You know what I mean." He said quietly.

Patton's smile turned sad, Remus didn't like that one bit. "Well… I think I do, but I don't want to make assumptions, I'd much prefer it if you tell me yourself. But you don't have to if you don't feel comfortable sharing, we just met after all." He giggled slightly at that. "And my mom always said not to trust strangers… but you seem pretty trustworthy." He grinned at him.

Remus looked down. "I'm not… can't even trust my own godam feelings." He spit bitterly.

"Remus. Look at me." Patton's tone was suddenly demanding, gone was his gentleness, though sympathy was still clear in his voice.

Remus swallowed but did as he told, meeting the man's gorgeous, deep blue eyes. "Listen to me very carefully okay? This is important. Feelings are and always have been confusing as heck, trust me I know. But that doesn't mean you shouldn't trust them, they're such an important part of you. You can't allow yourself to not trust them or ignore them, understand?"

Remus didn't say anything for a long moment, Patton's gaze holding his all the while.

"You don't know me… it's different for me…" he finally said quietly. "Today I realized…" he trailed off. "I think I feel wrong, you know? Sure people can fall out of love, I'm not 8, I know true love and soulmates are bullshit… but is it normal to just wake up one day with those intense feelings… gone? Like they weren't even there to begin with even though you definitely remember feeling them?" He asked genuinely, searching Patton's eyes for answers.

"Normal? Oh I wouldn't know, never felt romantic love in my life." Patton chuckled lightly, seeming amused.

Remus frowned. "What?"

Patton just smiled. "Yeah, I was shocked too when I realized, it's funny how we take romantic love for granted that we're so surprised  someone else doesn't feel it…" he looked pointedly at Remus. "Or feels it differently."

Remus raised his eyebrows. "Different how?"

Patton shrugged. "Well, that depends, it's a huge spectrum with so many different experiences and possibilities. Like I said, I don't like making assumptions. But whatever it is you're feeling, it's valid. There's no such thing as 'feeling wrong', everyone's different."

"But… not feeling it at all? Man! You got lucky! Romance is so fucking messy and confusing. Like, I wanted to kiss you since I laid eyes on yo-" Remus cut himself off when he realized what he just said, his cheeks beginning to warm. Idiot! He just said he doesn't fall in love! You just made him uncomfortable now!

Patton let out a nervous giggle. "Um… what did you just say? Cause it sounded like- hey! Wait!"

Remus was running before he even realized it, pushing the bathroom door open and locking himself in one of the stalls, breathing heavily.

He heard someone come in moments later. "Remus?"

"Just go away! Before I make things worse!" Remus sat down on the toilet, head in his hands and tears streaming down his cheeks.

"Remus it's okay-"

"It's not! Stop being so fucking sweet and tell me truth! Tell me how terrible I am!" Remus sobbed.

"...can I come in?" Patton asked softly.

Remus didn't say anything, but he unlocked the door with an obvious click.

Suddenly there were warm arms wrapping around him and holding him tight against Patton's chest and Remus sobbed louder. "You're not terrible, Remus." He whispered softly in his ear.

"How do you know that? We just met, I… I hurt so many people! Just this morning I broke Jaxon's heart! They didn't deserve how I treated them… I'm fucking awful and no one should be around me! Especially not you… Just go, please." Remus yelled into Patton's shoulder.

Patton waited as he held Remus tightly until his sobs subsided.

"I'm a mess, Patton." He finally said, breaking their embrace and wiping his tears with the palms of his hands.

Patton just shook his head. "You're not."

Remus sighed. "You're a stubborn bastard, you know that? We've just met fucking 10 minutes ago!" Remus repeated for the millionth time. "If you really knew me, you would have agreed with me." He insisted.

Patton smiled slightly at that. "See, I think I do know you. Remus… I was just like you." Remus could have almost swore he heard a tiny break in his voice. Then he laughed slightly. "Guess you can say we're both a mess huh?"

"You… you're like me?" Remus sniffed loudly.

Patton nodded. "I ah… had a very hard time, figuring myself out. Lots of people I hurt along the way, people I mislead and… broke their hearts cause I was so desperate to be exactly like everyone else that I was willing to force myself into situations I… didn't really understand their gravity… I'm still trying to make up for all of that but I can't really blame the ones that don't want anything to do with me anymore…"

Patton cleared his throat. "So yeah, I can easily understand you, Remus. Yes, we both hurt a lot of people, but we regret it, right? And we're trying to be better… so we can't be all that bad." He smiled at him again.

"Maybe…" Remus reluctantly agreed and Patton smiled wider.

"That's the spirit! C'mon, let's get out of here." He said cheerfully, tugging on his wrists until he followed him out of the small stall and then out of the bathroom.

As the wave of noise from the bar hit them in full force Patton grimaced. "How about we go somewhere more quiet?" He asked Remus.

Quiet… private… with Patton…

Remus felt his damn cheeks get warm again at the thought but he nodded. "Do you have somewhere in mind?"

Patton thought for a moment as they stepped outside. "Does my apartment work? Only if you're comfortable of course! We can also just go sit at a park or something!" He added quickly.

Remus' eyes widen and his blush deepened. Oh god, he needs to get it together! "Y-yeah! That works!"

Patton beamed. "Great! We'll take my car!"

They were silent the first few moments of the drive. Then Remus spoke. "About… what I said earlier… if we can just forget-"

"It's fine, Remus, really. It might sound weird but… despite the fact that I don't feel romantic feelings… I still want a romantic relationship." Patton said, stopping at a red light and sneaking a glance at Remus, smiling.

"Though if I do end up being in one it'll probably be more like a QPR than a conventional relationship. My point is, you didn't make me uncomfortable, Remus." Patton said, turning his eyes back on the road when the light changed.

"QPR?" Remus asked, confused.

"Yeah! Stands for 'Queerplatonic Relationship'!" Patton chirped happily, clearly enjoying talking on the subject. "It's basically a relationship that's not inherently romantic and not platonic either, something in between you could say. It varies a lot between different people, some might cuddle and kiss, some may not. Some people will just like the emotional intimacy but not the physical one, and some would maybe prefer a mixture of both. It can be whatever you and your partner or partners want it to be!" He explained excitedly, finally parking the car.

Remus thought this over as they got out of the car and walked up the stairs to Patton's apartment. Does that mean… maybe there's still a chance?

"So…" Remus fumbled as they walked inside the small flat. "Does that mean… would like to um… you know… with me?"

Patton turned around to him sharply. "What?" He stared at him.

Remus took a deep breath. That was new, usually he jumped straight into relationships without a second thought, acting on impulse. But… this felt different… deeper and more meaningful. "I don't know, maybe it's stupid and I'm just rushing into another relationship that will end up hurting both of us and I'll add you to the list of people I did them wrong but… there's something about you, Patton. I can't explain it, but I sure as hell want to know more about it, I wanna keep you close to me." 

Remus looked away from Patton's intense gaze. "I'm still scared I'll blink and my feelings will change again. But you said I should still trust them, and right now, I really really like you, Patton. You don't have to agree of course, it'll just be super cool if you did…"

"Gosh Remus I… I don't know what to say… I'm flattered… I'm just me…" Remus turned to look at him again and saw that he was smiling, wider than he had ever seen him smile in their short time of knowing each other, and his eyes were shining. "You really want to be in a QPR with me?"

Remus nodded vigorously. "So much." He emphasised.

Patton giggled at his enthusiasm. "Alright, Remus, let's figure it out together." He took Remus' hand and Remus leaned closer until their foreheads met.

He grinned. "Yeah… together."  

[spicycreativity]

I saw you were taking requests and i wanted to send one in!

Can i request Remus angst, where his intrusive thoughts are getting really bad and he thinks that everyone is going to abandon him like roman (the split) and virgil, and then Janus comforts him and it ends with janus holding remus and comforting him?

Please and thank you!

You're awesome!!

This kinds turned into fluff, oops. Like angst-fluff. Also thank you for the request! This was a fun one b/c it's not something that ever would have occurred to me to try to write, and it was interesting to take a character like Remus, who feels very sure of himself (imo) and explore what kind of self-doubts he might have

I ended up leaning on my own experiences w intrusive thoughts and also that like Aro Fear that all your friends are gonna pair off and forget about you because That's What Happens

Anyway! I hope you like it!

Remus and Janus are QPPs, your honor

Unhealthy behaviors were hard to gauge with Remus. His being quiet was not always a red flag, nor was his tendency toward sudden bursts of energy. Even his self-soothing behaviors were a constant, and did not necessarily mean anything was amiss.

He was quiet this morning, chewing on his knuckles and staring at Janus, who was drinking his coffee and pretending to enjoy the silence.

Remus was agitated. He bit down on his bent index finger and tried not to think. Unfortunately for him, being Intrusive Thoughts meant experiencing intrusive thoughts, and no amount of coping mechanisms could make them go away. Much like himself, they simply demanded attention, repeating like propaganda, over and over and over until they became the truth. It wasn't self doubt and it wasn't fear. It simply was.

Today, the manifest truth that drove his front teeth together against the barrier of his finger was this: Janus was going to leave him. Roman left, after all, and Virgil left, and Patton and Logan wanted nothing to do with him. Not that Remus wanted anything to do with them, but if he ever did…

So it stood to reason that Janus was next.

The inevitability of it lodged in his chest like so many knives, until he was certain he could see them sticking out of his chest and-- Ah, they were there. Big, ugly butcher knives. Janus hadn't noticed yet, too busy with his newspaper (an imperfect facsimile of one Thomas had seen a few days ago in a coffee shop).

What would mornings be like without Janus? What would Remus do without anyone? Preemptive loneliness washed over him; the knives faded out and he started to go with them, gradually turning transparent in his armchair. Loneliness. That great certainty, that big, ugly fact.

What the fuck was he going to do without Janus? With no one to listen? How much time did he have left? How long before it all went away?

Now it was fear, now it was despair, now it was an utter lack of any sort of hope for the future, because it was going to happen, it was going to happen and there was nothing he could do about it, and it didn't matter if it was now or a year from now because there was no happy ending--

A few cold tears snaked down his cheeks. Stupid. Not shameful, but completely fucking stupid. He sniffled.

Janus put his newspaper down. Remus watched with blurred vision as his expression turned from curious to concerned and then stayed there, instead of reaching its usual sardonic terminus. "Um, Remus?"

It was hard to talk. Remus swallowed and made an effort. "What?"

"I don't know if you noticed, but you're crying."

"So?"

Janus cocked his head. "What do you mean 'so'?"

"So what?"

"Goodness, it's not like we're friends or anything. If you're upset, please keep it to--" Janus took a deep breath. "Look, if you're upset, you can talk to me about it. I want you to talk to me about it."

Remus accepted this with a nod, knowing full well it wasn't that simple. How could he make Janus understand? "I was just thinking about what it's going to be like when you leave, and… Well, I'm gonna miss you, that's all."

"When I leave?" Janus leaned forward, pressing his elbows on his knees so he could study Remus better. "Who said I was leaving?"

"Everyone else did," Remus said, trying for bravado. He got a few more tears instead, which he really should have seen coming. Remus was many things, but he was not a liar. "R-Roman went away, Virgil…" His voice broke. "I just…"

"Oh, come here." Janus got up. It was a difficult thing to jam two grown men into an armchair, but Janus was clever and arranged it somehow, so that Remus could rest his head on Janus' chest and get snot and tears all over his nice gray shirt. That was nice of him. "Remus, why are you mourning something that hasn't even happened?"

Sure enough, Janus didn't understand. "It's going to happen," Remus said. "I just know. It's-- I know it."

"Oh, come on, Remus." Janus pressed a kiss to the top of his head. "Where would I go? I don't like any of the others half as much as I like you."

"But--"

"But?"

Remus smiled through his tears and nuzzled into Janus' chest, leaving wet spots on his shirt. "I just made you say 'butt.'"

"There you are," said Janus, and the fondness in his voice was so undisguised, so genuine, that Remus found he had no choice but to believe in it. "I take it your brain is being mean to you today?"

"I guess," Remus said, because it was easier than arguing. He'd never been able to make Janus understand that the thoughts didn't always feel mean even if they were upsetting.

"How can I help?"

"Can we just stay like this?" Remus asked.

Janus ruffled his hair. "Of course. But you're not using my shirt as a tissue."

Remus wiped his eyes on Janus' shirt just to be contrary, and laughed when Janus jammed a whole fistful of tissues in his face. "Thank you," he said, shoving one of the tissues into his mouth and swallowing it for the joy in the shock value.

"I'm not going anywhere," Janus promised. "I'd like to see you try to get rid of me."

[ts-janus-rp-blog]

"What?!" Remus said with Patton in unison. "No, Janus... The reason why I made a duel with the wolf is cause I wanted to be alpha. I wanted to be leader. I figured it would make things easier if...you'd want to be my mate too? I talked with Patton and he is willing to have two mates. I'll be happy having you as my mate too along with Patton. I wanted to try something out about myself, I wanted to see if I'm Aro or demi. And I... I'm not stealing Patton from you. I promise I'm not. If you want you can continue being mates with Patton by yourself and I'll be the alpha. Or just...whatever you want." Remus explained with a smile.

Janus gasped when he was hugged, then he looked up to Patton in shock. "You... You really still want me as your mate?" He just couldn't believe what he was hearing. Then he looked up to Remus and listened to him. "You...made a duel with the wolf to become alpha? Is that why the wolf is very quiet right now?" He wondered, he noticed that he hasn't heard the wolf at all since he's woken up. And yet, the last time he woke up he couldn't get the wolf to shut up. "Aro...? Demi..? I... I don't know what that means but I... I don't know who you are... I just know that you are Romans brother... I um... I'll like to get to know you? So your not a stranger? At least? Is that okay? I'm not opposed to two mates. I never thought about having two mates before... But I'd like to try!" Janus glanced over to Patton, "Would you be upset with me if it doesn't work out?"

[@moralpuppylover2]

Patton snuck inside, trying not to wake his roommates. It was long past midnight, which would have been unusual before he started dating Percy. But ever since his twin brother Logan had started dating, then his boyfriend moved in, Patton had been so lonely. Percy wasnt always kind, but Patton was just happy to have someone who wanted him. In trying to keep quiet, Patton forgot to lock the door. He stumbled over to the couch and fell asleep.

That night was the full moon, but of course, Patton won't have paid much attention to it... Except he may come to regret that decision...

As a beast was stalking him, following his car as Patton drove the entire way home. The beast then emerged from the bushes once Patton walked into his home. Slowly the beast stalked right outside the door, until he didn't hear a single thing coming from inside the home. Perfect. He turned the doorknob slowly with his mighty paw and claws. And then he stepped inside. There he was. There his mate was. Sleeping on the couch... So perfectly...

The beast came forward, hovering over Patton. He leaned down and sniffed pattons neck. He'll do perfectly as his new mate... Yes... Yes he would.

He let out a deep snarl, his jaw opening slowly to reveal his massive fangs. Before he forcefully grabbed Patton and held him down onto the couch. His brilliant shining golden eyes stared down at Patton with hunger. He used one of his claws to tear into pattons clothes until he was naked. Yes. Perfect.

Then he grinned, before he slammed his massive cock into pattons hole without any warning. It was massive too, at least twice the size of a normal human member. The beast growled before he opened his jaw and clamped down onto pattons neck.

Wait... This is a werewolf! And it was the full moon which means...he won't have any memory of this happening in the morning. And he can't contain himself! Wait, this werewolf is injured too! His fluffy side was bleeding by the looks of it! It would appear that there was a bullet inside of his fur and skin, he must've gotten shot...

[a-small-batch-of-dragons]

Faded

Averykedavra prompt: okay, first of all, can I be added to your taglist? I love your fics! secondly, if you're open to prompts (apologies if you're not) could you write some logan-centric hurt/comfort? with roman and maybe Virgil comforting him? no pressure, but thanks!! and again your fics are absolutely incredible

Thanks for the prompt babe you’re an icon ^_^

Read on Ao3

Warnings: Logan’s not feeling so great, so self-doubt, self-esteem issues, all that jazz

Pairings: depending on how you want to read it, logince, analogical, possible prinxiety, analogince, or just hella platonic. My aro ass doesn’t know anymore you choose

Word Count: 4237

When a Side's role is disregarded, their door fades from the hallway.

Logan...do the others really need Logan?

Or just Logic?

 “Neato! So you're making your little factoids optional this time around.”

 Thank Archimedes the little pixelated boxes didn’t allow for much dynamic character interaction.

 Logan swallows and tries to keep going, growing more concerned that the lump in his throat would make it impossible to speak. But he can do this. For Thomas, he can do this. He has to.

 “Oh, I’ve got this one, guys!”

 ‘IGNORANT’ flashes up in front of him in big, red letters. Almost immediately he can hear the scoldings of Thomas and Patton followed by Roman’s mumbled apology but it’s too late. The word sears itself into his brain and he can’t see anything other than the choice that they’ve made.

 He swallows again. Alright. He’ll speak directly to the audience. Thomas has to listen to them eventually, doesn’t he?

 …well, maybe, but that doesn’t stop it from hurting every time he pops up with something and it’s completely ignored. He tries to appeal to Patton’s sense of humor. He tries to give Roman something when he can’t find the right words. He tries to give Thomas something, anything.

 Then he gets overexcited and pushes Patton into the blinds.

 The second Roman’s sword flashes out and slices him neatly in two a searing bolt of pain spreads to his arms, to his chest, to his throat. He knows logically—he knows everything logically—he can’t be hurt by that. It isn’t him. He is not connected in any way physically to these lowdowns.

 So why are his hands shaking?

 This is so ridiculous. He is Logic. He should not be working like this, he should not be reacting like this. This is logically the next step, he must simply not be out of the adjustment process yet. Which is ridiculous in and of itself, has he not mentioned several times over that the presence of the others imbeds Thomas’s ability to think rationally and calmly about the issues they have to face? Has he not himself wondered that if he were not so…undone by being in the same room that he finds it difficult to keep going when he needs to? Shouldn’t this be better?

 “You know I'm- I'm not doing a really great job explaining this philosophy. Um, Logan?”

 Patton? Logan pops up.

 Patton smiles—smiles?—at him as the box appears at the bottom of the screen. From this angle, he can’t see Roman or Thomas. What’s happening? Why hasn’t he been paying better attention?

 Why can’t he focus?

 “What would a real philosopher think about what I'm saying here?”

 Oh. Oh, no. This isn’t going to be good, is it?

 “Well, Frederich Nietzsche really wouldn't have been thrilled with anything you've had to say, primarily because pity seems to be at the center of your idea of ‘putting good into the world.’”

 “Th-that's not what—“

 “Nietzsche famously rejected the notion that pity was a virtue.”

 “Okay,” comes the quiet mumble that, really, should’ve told him to stop talking now, he wasn’t being useful anymore.

 But no. Logan was never very good at being quiet, now was he?

 “He once claimed that pity ‘runs counter to the instincts that preserve and enhance the value of life…’”

 Last chance, Logan, something in his head whispers as something else flashes in the corner of his vision.

  ‘Skip all.’

 But they would never do that, right? They knew, somewhere, because Thomas knew, that you had to listen to Logic. You had to listen, at some point, because if you didn’t, what did you have? They would shake their heads or grumble in annoyance, or cut him off when he’d been talking for too long or ask him to be quiet, but they’d never skip him entirely, cut him out of the conversation, would they?

 Patton’s finger presses the button and something of unyielding cold wraps around Logan’s neck.

 He flails as it yanks, jerking back awake with his eyes open, out of the boxes, out of the video, at his desk, staring at the screen as his lowdown program blocks him out.

 No.

 No!

 What happened? Why did they—is he—can he—

 Why didn’t they want to listen?

 Logan’s fingers fly over the keyboard in front of him, searching desperately for an answer. Maybe he programmed this wrong. Admittedly he’s a little new at programming so he could’ve messed something up that disconnected him. Maybe Patton clicked it by mistake. Why was there even a ‘skip all’ button to begin with? He doesn’t remember programming that. And what was it that wrapped around his throat?

 His hand goes to his neck at the mere memory of the horrible thing that yanked him out. He winces when his fingers slide of patches of warm, inflamed skin. It…it actually hurt. It left a mark.

 What—

 The instant his lowdown pops up with his face, he knows.

 It shouldn’t hurt. Really. This shouldn’t hurt.

 Now perhaps Deceit could see what it was like to be Logic. Or at least to try and be Logic.

 Now perhaps…perhaps he may have someone to talk to.

 No.

 Deceit was, in fact, far better at being Logic. Within an instant, he’d gotten the conversation to his side, gotten the others to listen, to think about what they were saying instead of just following on blind faith.

 Of course.

 Because it wasn’t Logic they didn’t want to listen to, was it?

 It was Logan.

 Logan closes his eyes. Alright. He can adapt to this. He can…he can work with this. He just has to figure out how.

 He turns away from the computer, stands, and carefully makes his way across his room to the nightstand, where the emergency first-aid kit sits tucked in the drawer. He will patch himself up, best he can, and then figure out what to do.

 He’s too distracted to hear Roman’s terrified shout.

  “What have you done with Logan?”

———————————————————

A few hours after filming stops, there’s a very soft knock on Logan’s door. He doesn’t move from his desk, nor does he pause in his typing. False sympathies and empty comforts have never been very appealing.

 …and he is just the slightest bit worried that he won’t be able to resist the urge to slam the door in Patton’s face.

 Footsteps moving away sound from outside. Good. It’s better this way, isn’t it?

 The lowdowns didn’t work. Well, they did…but they worked a little too well, didn’t they? Instead of being less invasive, they just…cut Logan’s contributions out entirely. They let Logan be taken. They were good for Logic, not Logan.

 Logan’s head turns to the wall where he has two lists tacked up. Standing, the desk chair scraping behind him, he picks up the marker.

 His job is to be Logic. Therefore, if he is failing at that job, he must find a way to be better.

 The list on the left has ‘LOGIC’ written in large, block letters. On the right, ‘LOGAN.’ Isolating the key characteristics of each concept will help to shift himself properly into the role he must play. Logan’s eyes scan down the ‘LOGIC’ list.

 LOGIC:

Emotionless

Useful

Rational

Necessary

Welcome

 The end of the word ‘welcome’ is smeared. Logan looks down at the marker. His hands had shaken so much as he added that last word…why? It was true; logic should be welcome in any conversation, that’s why is it so useful, that’s why it has so many of the other characteristics that it has. Logic should be wanted, regardless of the subject matter, because of what it could do. It had felt so small of Logan to add the word, even when it was the correct course of action. Was it not implied by the others that it should be wanted?

 That…that he should be wanted?

 Unconsciously, Logan twists the cap of the marker back and forth as his eyes dart over to the ‘LOGAN’ list.

 LOGAN:

Irritating

Invasive

Emotional

Easily dismissed

Unwanted

 If he had any doubts about whether or not these qualifications were inaccurate, each had cemented their place on this list after today.

 Logan’s hand flies to his neck again, grazing over the bandages he’d wrapped around himself, only to stutter to a halt when his fingers met the fabric of his tie.

 His tie.

 Hadn’t—he’d—he’d been so sure he’d been doing this right. He dressed well, he spoke carefully, he did his research, why—why was it so easy for them to say he was—to think of him as—

 …why didn’t they want to listen to him?

 He tried. He tried so hard to be what they wanted, what they would listen to, to appeal to each and every one of them to make sure he was still fitting in enough to be heard. Logic had to be heard, that’s one of its most important qualifications.

 As his fingers fumble and catch around the knot, it pulls taut and for a moment he’s thrown back into the feeling of Deceit’s crook around his neck.

 Oh.

 Oh, that’s right…he…Deceit—or, well, Janus, now—didn’t he...he was…Logic isn’t the problem.

 Janus’s Logic made them listen. Janus’s logic made them pay attention. Janus’s Logic was wanted.

 Logan’s fingers slide off his tie in a numb haze.

 His hand falls limply to his side.

 He stares at the lists.

  Irritating.

  Invasive.

  Emotional.

  Easily dismissed.

 There is a reason none of these qualifications have come up when he considers pure Logic.

 A wave of cold rushes over Logan. His knees wobble. His hand staggers out for something, anything to grab onto, to hold, to stop himself from collapsing under the weight of what he just realized, to stop it, to stop it, to stop—

 He hits the ground with a thud.

 The words beat into his head over and over as he lies there, frozen, cold, so cold, curled up by his bed with something wrapped tightly around his throat and his glasses staying stubbornly on his face so the words remain in perfect focus.

 It is not Logic that is the problem.

 The others can use Logic.

 The others can listen to Logic.

 The others can want Logic.

 They just don’t want Logan.

 Logan curls closer around himself as it starts to become very, very cold. That…this can’t be right, he must be missing something. He’s emotionally compromised right now, he’s not any good at being Logic, maybe—maybe that means he’s doing it wrong, he has to be doing this wrong, there’s no way they could—they need him, don’t they? They need Logan, they have to listen to him, they—they—

 Unbidden, a whine escapes Logan’s throat. It burns as it rings around his empty, cold room. He covers his face with his hands.

 Even his cheeks feel icy cold.

 Someone will notice, he tries frantically, someone will notice if I never show up again, someone will notice if I—if—if—

 But they didn’t notice. Not today.

 Not until it was too late.

 Outside, in the corridor, a dark blue door begins to fade into the wall.

———————————————————

“Logan? Logan!”

  Bam, bam, bam.

  “Logan!”

 Frantic hammering against the door jolts him awake. Immediately he winces as something in his neck catches. How—how long has he been like this?

 “Logan, please, open the door, we—we can’t open it!”

 Oh…the others have noticed…should go open the door.

 Wincing again, Logan rights himself, sitting up with his back leaning against the bed, blinking through his fuzzy glasses. Why are they so filthy?

 …oh, he must’ve been crying.

 How emotional.

 “Logan? Logan can you at least say something?”

 “I’m gonna break this door down.”

 “No!”

 Well, yes, Logan does not want his door broken down. Groaning, he stands, making his way over to the door that—wait.

 Why…why is his door so…pale?

 The knob looks almost translucent as he reaches for it, his pulse hammering as his fingers close gently around where it should be. He takes a deep breath and carefully, carefully, turns it.

 “Logan, thank god, I—“ Virgil cuts himself off with a choked gasp as he stares at Logan. “…L? What…what happened to you?”

 “What do you mean?” The instant it comes out of his mouth he knows what Virgil means. He sounds like his throat is actively attempting to cut itself off with every breath.

 A choked whine comes from behind Virgil. Logan’s eyes dart over to see Roman a sickly pale, staring at Logan, horrified.

 “…S-specs? Specs, I—Logan, oh, no, can I—can we—“ Roman reaches for him, only to freeze and quickly pull back his hand.

 Another wave of cold settles over Logan and his hand falls through the doorknob.

 “Logan,” Virgil murmurs, “can we come in, please? I, uh, we wanna talk to you for a moment.”

  Why would you want to talk to me?

 “…of course.” Logan steps aside and lets them pass, looking down at his hand.

 It’s still a hand, but it looks…thinner. He can tell where it isn’t, if that makes sense.

  When has Logan ever made sense?

 Virgil sits down on the floor, next to his bed. Roman hovers near the door, wringing his hands together as Logan carefully pushes the door closed.

 “I’m sorry, Logan.”

 Logan’s eyes widen as his head jerks around to face Roman. Roman gives him what may be the smallest smile he’s ever seen before taking a deep breath.

 “I’m sorry,” he says again, the sincerity making the cold burn in Logan’s chest, “I didn’t mean to hurt you. It—it was stupid of me to press the ‘ignorant’ button and it was not my intention to hurt you. And I...slashing your box was wrong too. I just saw Patton get hurt and I—”

 He cuts himself off and takes a deep breath. 

 "I'm sorry, Logan," he repeats, softer this time, "for all that I have done to hurt you. I want to be better about it."

 Oh. “…thank you, Roman,” Logan says carefully, “I appreciate your apology.”

 Roman gives him a nod. Logan looks at Virgil, whose head still rests against the bed, staring at the two of them.

 “Is this what you wanted to discuss?”

 “Sort of, but…uh, Logan, you…you’re not looking so great, bud.” Virgil shifts, looking to Roman, who nods and takes a seat on the floor too, leaving a space between them. “Will you come sit with us?”

 “…of course.”

 Logan sits gingerly between the two of them, his gaze fixed on the outlet in the wall opposite them. He hears the rustling of fabric as Virgil shifts, and sees a little white in the corner of his eye as Roman scoots a tad closer.

 “So,” Virgil murmurs after a second, “I guess this video was…hard.”

 Roman huffs quietly. Logan nods. “Yes.”

 “Can you tell me what happened?”

 “Have the others not already told you?”

 “I’d like to hear it from you too.”

 Logan takes a deep breath, ignoring the way the cold burns the inside of his lungs. “I attempted to implement a new strategy for how I interact with you and the viewers. Instead of appearing in person, I chose to use a series of lowdowns so the information would appear in a non-invasive way.”

 There’s a moment of silence.

 “…keep going, L.”

 “They were…not as well-received as I had anticipated.”

 A flash of movement and a stifled noise make him look over. Roman fiddles with the hem of his sleeve right in front of his mouth, obviously having cut himself off. He glances over.

 “I’m sorry,” he says quietly, “I didn’t want to interrupt. Please, continue.”

 “I, er…” Logan swallows, something about the movement of Roman’s fingers holding his focus captive. “I hurt Patton.”

 From his other side comes a sharp intake of breath. Logan looks away.

 “I hurt Patton. I could not do my job properly. I had compromised the conversation. A ‘skip all’ button appeared and…”

 “Patton pressed it,” Virgil finishes when Logan doesn’t speak, “he told me.”

 Logan doesn’t say anything. The crook manifests around his throat again and he shudders.

 “…Logan,” Roman’s worried voice says, even as it sounds like it’s coming from underwater, “Logan, did…what did that do to you?”

 “Janus,” Logan croaks, “he—his staff, it—I—“

 “Hey, hey,” Virgil croons, reaching for the hands that tug persistently at his collar, at his bandages, when did they get there?— “don’t do that, L, you’re gonna hurt yourself, stop that…”

 “Logan, can I hold your hand, please?”

 Logan lets Virgil tug his hands away from his neck. It—why—what’s happening?

 Why are Virgil’s hands so warm?

 Judging by Virgil’s expression, he’s as concerned about the stark difference in temperature as Logan is. Several emotions flit across his face before Logan can name them until they both register Roman’s question. Roman holds his hand out, all but pleading for Logan to let him.

 “Please,” he whispers, his hand starting to tremble, “please, Logan, may I…can I just hold your hand?”

 “Why are you so worried,” Logan wants to ask, “what is it that makes you so insistent about holding my hand?”

 Instead, when his voice is barely about a strangled whisper and his first attempt makes his hand phase completely through Roman’s, the question emerges as a stifled scream.

 “Shh, shh,” Roman whispers, moving in as close as he can, trying to curl his hands around where Logan’s should be, “it’s okay, it’s okay, we’ll—we’ll figure it out, Logan, we’ve got you, it’s okay—“

 Roman burns.

 “R-ro—“

 “Easy, Roman,” Virgil mutters from behind him, “take it easy, you’re gonna freak us all out.”

 “I know, I know.” Roman clutches the air of Logan’s hand tightly. “Okay…okay, Specs, we gotta…we’re gonna take some deep breaths, okay?”

 No, no, it hurts when Logan does that, what’s…

 He does as bid. The air whines in protest as he slowly breathes in and out, in and out, focusing on Roman’s thumb rubbing small circles into his hand. Roman seems to calm a little as he watches, bringing Logan’s hand close enough to cradle it in his lap as they breathe.

 “Good,” Virgil manages, still clutching Logan’s other hand tightly, his own voice shaking slightly, “okay, now we’re all just gonna calm down, yeah? Just…nice and calm…”

 Logan has no idea how long they sit there, on the floor, only that after a few more deep breaths, it no longer hurts. Roman’s hand no longer burns, it’s just warm. Virgil no longer trembles, he’s just there.

 “My apologies,” he manages, “I did not mean to be so…inconvenient.”

 Roman’s cry of protest is quickly accompanied by: “hey, no, none of that, Logan, you’re not being inconvenient. It’s been a hard day for all of us.”

 “But was I not—“

 “No,” Roman interrupts gently, “I’m sorry for interrupting, but…no, Logan. Nothing that happened today was your fault. Absolutely nothing.”

 “…I’m the one who hurt Patton.”

 “That was an accident and you didn’t know it was going to do that,” Roman says firmly, “and it was our fault we didn’t listen to you. So much that you felt that was your only option.”

 Logan swallows. “…what about Janus?”

 “What about him,” Virgil prompts, “the fact that he…came into the video?”

 “It was my lowdowns that enabled him to do so.”

 “And we pressed the ‘skip all’ button,” Roman says. “And I’m the one who gave him tips on how to impersonate the rest of us better.”

 Roman is right, even as Logan begins to feel cold again. Still, he opens his mouth.

 “I…I’m not…I can’t…it…”

 “Logan,” Roman says quietly when Logan can’t seem to find the words, “none of us are angry with you. I’m certainly not angry with you, and I’m…I’m sorry about everything that I may have done and have done to give you the impression that I do not hold you in the highest esteem possible.”

 Logan’s mouth drops open in shock.

 “I think you overdid it a little there, Princey,” Virgil chuckles.

 “But it’s true,” Roman insists, still cradling Logan’s hand in his lap, “Logan, you’re…you’re so important. And if I have done anything that makes you think I don’t care so much about you, then I…I will do everything I can to fix this.”

 What?

  What?

 “You…but we..we fight,” Logan manages weakly, “all the time, you…you disagree with me every chance you get, how—“

 “I told you on movie night,” Roman says, the corner of his mouth tugging up, “I poke fun at the things I love.”

  Love.

 Logan’s brain stutters to a pause.

 “You’re my family, Logan,” Roman continues, oblivious to the fact that Logan.exe has stopped functioning, please try again later, “and I…you are so clever, so sharp, so good that of course I want to talk to you about things. I respect your opinion so much and I want to hear everything.”

 “Yeah, if you ever stop teaching us stuff I might actually start crying and never stop.”

 “Virgil!”

 “What, like you’re any better?”

 “Of course not! I would be devastated!”

 “Wait, wait,” Logan mumbles, “you—you what?”

 “L,” Virgil calls softly, still chuckling a little as Logan turns to look at him, “L, we care about you so much. We wanted to give you space, especially after today, but…dude, you know we need you, don’t you?”

 “You need Logic,” Logan mumbles, “you…of course you need Logic.”

 “We do,” Roman confirms as the cold threatens to open up in Logan’s chest again, “but we also love Logan.”

 “You have got to stop throwing that word around,” Virgil murmurs, “you’re gonna send him into a full-blown freak-out.”

 “But we do, Virgil. We do love him, so much, and if he doesn’t know that…”

 Roman squeezes a surprisingly solid hand in his lap.

 “…then we have to remind him.”

 Virgil huffs, scooting closer. “Yeah, well, that’s easy enough.”

 No, no, it very much is not.

 Logan’s brain is still struggling to come to grips with the first thing Roman said, about poking fun at the things he loves. He hasn’t come close to tackling the fact that Roman just said they loved him.

 And Virgil agreed.

 “This…this doesn’t make sense,” Logan says weakly, “this doesn’t make sense.”

 “What doesn’t make sense?” Virgil’s hand is a warm weight against his side. “That we love you?”

 “…y-yes?”

 “Oh, sweetheart,” Virgil murmurs, “what makes you so convinced that you’re unlovable?”

 “I…I can’t…I am emotionally compromised. I cannot do my job properly. I will not be as useful as you—“

 “Do you need to be useful to be lovable?”

 “Don’t you?”

 “No,” he says firmly, pressing Logan between the two of them, “no, you don’t, Logan. We love you for you, not for what you can do.”

 “Don’t leave us, Logan.” The sheer amount of pain in Roman’s voice aches. “Not because you think we won’t want you.”

 A horrible laugh bubbles up in his throat. “And here I thought you were going to leave me.”

 “Never,” Roman promises, “never.”

 “We did threaten to break down your door because it was starting to fade from the hallway.”

 “…I don’t know what’s happening to me.”

 “You don’t need to know right now, we’ll help you.”

 “I don’t know how good I’m going to be at this.”

 “We’re all working on things, it’s okay.”

 “But I—“ Logan swallows heavily— “I don’t know if I can stop believing that I…that it is just Logic you want and not Logan.”

 “If it makes you feel any better,” Roman calls, squeezing his hand, “I still struggle with that too.”

 Logan’s eyes widen. “You what?”

 “Believe that you only keep me around as long as I make things that you think are useful?” Roman smiles sadly. “Yeah.”

 “But you’re—you—Thomas would not be able to exist without you!”

 “Wouldn’t he?”

 “No! It’s not just—Roman, you’re so much more than Creativity, if you weren’t here, we…” Logan takes a deep breath and swallows. “Something would truly be lost if you weren’t here.”

 He stops.

 “…oh.”

 “Yeah, Specs,” Roman whispers, “‘oh.’”

 “…oh.”

 “Come here, sweetheart,” he murmurs, opening his arms and letting Logan fall into his embrace, “don’t you leave us, okay?”

 Virgil drapes himself over them, wrapping his arms tightly around Logan’s waist. “We’ll figure it out, L, but you gotta stick around, okay? Don’t—well, try not to worry about whether or not you’re being the perfect Logic. We want you.”

 “…promise?”

 “I promise.”

 “I promise too,” Roman murmurs, letting Logan rest against his chest, “now why don’t we all get into something more comfortable and we can have another look at your neck?”

 “Yes. That sounds…good.”

 “And Logan?” Logan cranes his head up to look. “If you ever stop teaching us things and telling me about stuff I will start crying.”

 Despite everything, Logan smiles.

 “Don’t worry,” he says quietly, the chill finally beginning to thaw, “I’m not going anywhere.”

General Taglist: @frxgprince @potereregina @reddstardust @gattonero17 @iamhereforthegayshit @thefingergunsgirl @awkwardandanxiousfander @creative-lampd-liberties @djpurple3 @winterswrandomness @sanders-sides-uncorrect-quotes @iminyourfandom @bullet-tothefeels @full-of-roman-angst-trash @ask-elsalvador @ramdomthingsfrommymind @demoniccheese83 @pattonsandershugs @el-does-photography @princeanxious  @firefinch-ember @fandomssaremysoul @im-an-anxious-wreck @crazy-multifandomfangirl @punk-academian-witch @enby-ralsei @unicornssunflowersandstuff @wildhorsewolf @thetruthaboutthesun @stubbornness-and-spite @princedarkandstormv @your-local-fookin-deadmeme @angels-and-dreams @averykedavra @a-ghostlight-for-roman  @such-a-dumbass

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[iclaimedtobethebetterbard]

Janus 4 the character thing !

hehe ty for the ask!!

[ask me abt my thoughts on tss characters]

First impression: i. don’t remember exactly what i thought of him, tbh. i think i vaguely disliked him, maybe? or else felt confused by him, like i couldn’t understand what his motivations were for his actions. i do remember i used to enjoy u!janus fics a lot more than i do now. (now i avoid u!sides in general unless i find a really compelling reason to make an exception.) and i remember i thought there was a case to be made for interpreting canon janus as being unsympathetic, although it was not my personal interpretation of him. (i do not personally think that there is a case to be made for canon u!janus anymore.)

Impression now: pof was the turning point for me in terms of what i thought of his character, bc i understood much more about his character and motivations and wants after that episode. he ZOOMED up in my favorites ranking from “near the bottom” to “tied with virgil for 2nd place,” which is where he’s still at for me. obviously he is nowhere near being in the right about some things, and he can be manipulative and sometimes does things that hurt people when that could easily have been avoided, which. is bad. but he’s not evil. he wants the best for thomas.

and i think a lot of the way he treats the light sides is bc he doesn’t trust them. i think we have never yet seen him in an environment/around people that he feels comfortable and safe with, and i think he would be significantly different in such an environment. (the closest we’ve gotten was when patton left him alone with c!thomas in pof, but even then i don’t think he felt fully comfortable and safe to just be himself without all his shields up.)

this line of thought is actually what leads to a lot of my characterization for janus in one chance to change your fate—they genuinely trust the characters they’re around most of the time, and so their behavior in the fic can at times be quite different from canon!janus, but is i think at least somewhat similar to how he’d be around people he trusts and feels safe with. and for the same reasons, octcyf!janus’s behavior gets much closer to what we’ve seen of canon!janus when they’re around people they distrust, like when they visited franz and lady genevive in chapter 6.

but yeah!! basically i love janus a lot i think he is so fun and i love thinking about him and thinking about angst for him (especially when it’s at least partly his own fault and is the consequences for his own actions hehehe). i also think he is so so SO pretty and should kiss remus a whole lot about it, bc i am way too aro for that but he is definitely very attractive and kissing should definitely happen about it. <3

Favorite moment: ohhh there are a lot. he has so many good lines. “i’ll take care of him <3” and “didn’t it seem KIND OF ridiculous [...] ....NO!!!!!!!!! i am TRYING to tEACH YOU a LESSON, but it’s LITERALLY IMPOSSIBLE!!” are probably some of my very top ones though.

Idea for a story: gfjkgds okay. i have a really mean angsty oneshot i want to write for janus. in canonverse, after pof. where janus makes virgil mad at him over some petty little thing. so they're arguing about it. and the argument escalates. and ultimately virgil lashes out with “well, at least thomas likes me!” and then kind of. stops. bc he realizes hes gone Too Far and crossed a line. but he can’t unsay it.

and like. the thing is. theyre In Janus’s Room while this is happening. so he would 100% for sure know if it was a lie. and,,,, it was Not a lie.

and it hurts janus SO much bc his entire existence is for thomas and he loves and cares about and wants to protect thomas so much. and it Hurts that the person who is the most important to janus actually dislikes him, and it Hurts that virgil gets the love and forgiveness and attention from thomas that janus wants so badly, and it Hurts that virgil is not his friend anymore, and it Hurts that virgil would use all of that against him. but also he Cannot let virgil see him break down no matter how much he wants to bc they do Not have that kind of trust between them anymore.

and just. hhhh. i want to hurt him so badly. and make virgil feel SO guilty for accidentally going a LOT farther than he meant to, but also he absolutely is not willing to admit he was in the wrong to janus or apologize to him, again bc they no longer have that kind of trust and neither of them feel at all okay with displaying any vulnerability at all to each other. so it’s just really really bad for both of them and they’re both hurting at the end of the story. hgjkdfhjskdg.

(why is it that all my ideas for canonverse fics are just Incredibly Painful Angst With No Comfort?? i do not know. normally i do happy endings, idk what it is about canonverse that prevents me from that fjdfgk)

Unpopular opinion: ooooo. hm. idk if i have any particularly noteworthy unpopular opinions about janus. .....i don’t particularly ship roceit? does that count? i feel like they’re pretty popular nowadays, idk. and like, i don’t particularly dislike the ship, i just feel. extremely neutral about it. the dynamic fails to appeal to me. idk.

Favorite relationship: oh definitely DEFINITELY dukeceit all the way. i love them sm i have so many emotions about them they are my favorite ship after analogical they are in love they are soulmates they are the gay gomez and morticia addams they are best friends they are partners in crime they know each other better than anyone and they work so perfectly together they would do anything for each other they would go to the ends of the earth together they call each other home they trust each other completely when they never trust anyone else they tHEY THEY THEY—

(although. i will say i am also a Sucker for anxceit content, whether that’s familial or romantic, and whether it’s fluffy or angsty.)

Favorite headcanon: i think coldblooded janus is actually canon or very close to it from stuff real life thomas has said, so i can’t say that lol. hmmm. janus having a huge sweet tooth is one that i love.

-

in case ppl don’t want to scroll back up: [ask me abt my thoughts on tss characters]

[seething-fire]

It Might Just Be Okay

Roman and Patton in a highschool AU

Patton Gray discovers that he’s aromantic and comes out to his best friend, Roman Maxwell

Word count: 1.7k

Warnings: Use of a swear word, Patton feeling like he’ll be alone forever, self-denial of one’s identity, Remus being Remus (only for a small amount of time)

Angsty fluff with a happy ending

Disclaimer: I know that not all aromantic people are alone forever, but this is just something I felt when I discovered that I was aromantic, so I projected onto Patton.. Roman does kind of correct him, though. *Also Patton feels weird when someone has a crush on him, but I know that not all aro people feel this way. There are 3 main kinds of aros: Romance positive, romance neutral (indifferent) or romance repulsed, and I think Patton in this fic may be indifferent, so I know that this is not everyone’s experience. If you have any questions, please feel free to ask! :)

*Also, this is one of my first fics, so this is most definitely not perfect

Patton knew he had to get to sleep, but something was on his mind. At school yesterday, he found out that one of his classmates, Janus, has a crush on him. He couldn’t figure out why he felt so weird. Isn’t this supposed to be a good thing? Crushes are good, right? He had had a crush on a boy when they were in 7th grade. Logan was always kind to him, and Patton enjoyed his company. That had to be a crush.

Patton desperately wanted to talk to his best friend, Roman about it, but he was terrified that the romance obsessed theatre kid wouldn’t understand. The thing was, he liked the idea of being in a relationship, but the thought of Janus acting on his feelings made him uncomfortable. Since he didn’t know if he could talk to Roman or not, he consulted the internet.

He opened Google and typed in: what does a crush feel like?

Upon finding the answer, he realized the feelings he’d had towards Logan were not romantic. The signs were butterflies, happiness when that person is around, wanting to see them everywhere, and increased heart rate. Has he ever had an actual crush? He saw guys all the time that he thought were cute, but he didn’t want to date them, he just thought they were good looking.

After a few minutes of reading, he saw the word “aromantic”. He kept scrolling, and got the definition.

Aromantic: Someone who experiences little to no romantic attraction

He sat in stunned silence. This couldn’t be him. He liked the idea of being in a relationship. He wanted someone that he could spend the rest of his life with! He wasn’t aromantic, no way.

He opened Google again and searched: am I aromantic?

After reading through reddit pages, articles, and a website dedicated to a-spec people, he was utterly confused. He didn’t really want to fall in love, he just liked the idea of it. But come to think of it, his idea of a relationship actually seemed like a friendship.

When he got bored in class and daydreamed about his future, he always saw a boy that he lived with. However, they never kissed, they didn’t hold hands, they cuddled, but not romantically, and they didn’t share a room. That’s basically a best friend!

Closing his computer, he looked at the clock. 2:48 am. He had to get up at 6:15 for school. Sighing and rolling over in bed, he closed his eyes.

6:15 came really early that morning, but his annoying alarm wasn’t the first thought on his mind.

“I might be aromantic.” He whispered to himself. After a few seconds, he shook his head. Maybe he was just experiencing something normal. His head was spinning trying to figure it out. This has to be how everyone feels, right? Maybe I’m just a late bloomer. Yeah, that’s it, I’m a late bloomer. I think I should tell Roman about this. He may not understand, but he’s my best friend, maybe he could at least give me some advice.

This is fine. Everything is fine. Nothing to worry about.

With the schedule he had today, he wouldn’t see Roman until lunch, which felt like it was forever away.

—

When he sat down next to Roman at their usual table, he noticed that his friend was looking at him weird. “What’s wrong, Ro? Did something happen?” Roman took a bite of his sandwich and continued to stare at Patton. “Nope. You just seem kinda weird today, Puffball. Are you okay? Do I need to fight someone for you?” Patton placed a reassuring hand on Roman’s shoulder. “No, no fighting Roman. I’m just kind of struggling with something… Can I ask you a question about love?” Roman gasped. “Love?! Oh my gosh, are you in love? Who is he? What’s his name? Wh-” Patton quickly shook his head. “No, I’m not in love. It’s kind of the opposite of that… I don’t think I’ve ever had a crush on someone, and finding out that Janus has a crush on me sparked some negative feelings. I googled some stuff last night, and I found the term aromantic. Have you ever heard of it?” Taking a second to chew his sandwich, Roman pondered. “When someone feels little to no romantic attraction?” Patton nodded. “Is that what you think you are, Pat?” He stared silently at his food while he thought about his response.

“Hey,” Patton looked up. “If you don’t know, that’s perfectly fine. If you don’t want to share that with me, that’s fine too. I just want you to know that whatever you say, if you choose to say anything at all, is one hundred percent safe with me.” The sweater clad boy smiled. “I know, Princey, thank you.” The bell rang, signaling that it was time to go to their next class. “Shit! lunch is always so short!” Roman quickly gathered his things, and helped Patton with his, then they said their goodbyes.

Still confused and walking to class, he couldn’t help but feel a bit let down. He thought that he would have more time to talk with Roman, but he’d just have to figure out another way to communicate his complicated feelings.

—--

When school got out, the two met at their usual spot, the giant oak tree near the bus loop.

“Do you want to sleep over at my house since it's Friday? My brother won’t be home, so don’t worry. I know he kind of scares you.” Patton smiled. “I’d love to! I just need to call my mom first.” Roman nodded, and the pair started their walk home together.

When they got to Roman’s house, they were greeted with silence. Patton wasn’t surprised, he knew the drill. Roman and Remus’ parents were split up, and they lived with their mom. She worked crazy hours as an ER nurse, so they didn’t see a whole lot of her.

The Maxwell house was pretty small, and it was one story, which Patton appreciated, because midnight snacks were very accessible.

When they got to Roman’s room, they threw their stuff down on the floor, and Patton looked around. He’d been there hundreds of times, but every single time, Patton had to take a minute and enjoy all the theater posters, movie scripts, and awards that Roman had accumulated over the years. Patton wasn’t exactly a theater kid, so that world was magical and foregin to him.

“Do you want to talk about what happened at lunch?” Suddenly feeling nervous, he tucked his hair behind his ears, an anxious fidget he had developed. “You mean the whole aromantic thing?” Nodding, Roman ripped open a pack of Pocky and held some out towards Patton. Taking some of the strawberry covered sticks, he sat down next to his bag. “I fit the definition perfectly, but I don’t know- I don’t think I want that to be me, you know?” Shoving some of the candy in his mouth, Roman shook his head. “I want to be normal. I may not want to fall in love, but I like the idea of it! That has to count for something, right? It’s just- out of all the identities out there, why do I have to be the one where I end up alone forever?” Patton’s eyes were beginning to fill with tears. “I may not want to kiss someone, or get married, but I’m- I’m still deserving of some kind of love, right?” Roman immediately stood up and embraced his friend. “Of course you are! I love you so, so much, Pat. You mean the world to me.” Sniffing, the crying boy wiped his eyes. “We’ve only been friends since freshman year, but I’d spend the rest of my life with you, padre. You’re my best friend, and I just want you to know that no matter how you identify, you are perfect just the way you are. You will always be deserving of love, no matter what.” Patton buried his head in his friend’s shoulder.

—

After taking a break from their heavy conversation, an idea popped into Roman’s head. “Have you ever heard of queer platonic partners?” Looking up from the comic book he was reading, the glasses wearing softie shook his head. “Queer platonic partners are when a-spec people have a partner, often on the aromantic or asexual spectrum as well, but they’re platonic. It’s more than just a best friend, it’s a person with whom you share a deep connection. Sometimes queer platonic partners get married, so you don’t need to worry about spending the rest of your life alone, Pat! You can just find one of those!” He closed the comic he was reading and adjusted his glasses. “But wouldn’t that be kind of hard? One percent of the population is aromantic, Ro.” The other boy shook his head excitedly. “One percent of the population is 70 million people! And you have a perfectly good a-spec person right here!” Confused, Patton looked around the room. “Wait, are- are you a-spec too?” A huge smile spread across Roman’s face. “Yep! I’m demi-romantic and akoisexual!” Patton was smiling, but still slightly confused. “What’s ako- whatever you just said?” Roman stifled a laugh. “Akoisexual. Also known as lithsexual. It means that I experience some sexual attraction, but it fades if it’s reciprocated.” Tackling his best friend in a hug, Patton could not stop smiling. “Ro, this is great! I’m so happy for you! And for me, because I have the best queer platonic partner in the world!”

—-

It was 3 am when they heard the door slam. Patton looked at Roman in a panic. “Is that-” A voice interrupted him. “Oh brother, dear! I’m home!” A maniacal laugh followed. He tried to hide, but Roman’s door flew open. “Oooo! The cutie is here! What’s up, Pattie Cakes?” He couldn’t respond. His face was beet red, and the only sounds that came out of his mouth were stutters. “Aw, I love it when you get flustered! Anyway, you missed a crazy party, Roman. The cops had to break it up!” Disinterested, his brother nodded. “Well, nighty night you two. You know where I’ll be, Patton. Don’t be shy.” He winked and left.

Groaning, Patton laid down on the floor. “I’m sorry about him, I didn’t know he’d be home so soon.”

“If we’re queer platonic partners for life, does that mean that he’ll be around forever?”

“Most likely.”

[poisonedapples]

👀👀 logince au you say

!!! Hell yeah my dood

Logan is nonbinary and gay (attracted to men, they just call themself queer or gay), and Roman is pan and a trans man. Patton is Roman’s best friend, who is aro and gay. Virgil might also be around there somewhere but I haven’t thought much about him. Remus is Roman’s twin (obviously), and him and Janus have been dating since eighth grade

Roman used to be the popular soccer girl. You know the ones who are the leaders of their posse with rich parents and think they own the world because they date every man to exist? Yeah that was Roman. He also used to be a huge bully to the one openly queer person in the whole school; Logan Sanders.

Logan has been out as gay for a while now, and even before then, people were assume they were gay. They also are transfeminine and dressed more “weird” when they were closeted and dysphoric. Roman grew up to pick on kids like them, so they did.

Eventually one day, after a lot of bullying from Roman and his gang, Logan punches Roman in the face, keeps attacking him, and gets suspended. Except when their suspension is over, Logan doesn’t come back. That made Roman think a lot about what he was saying.

That same weekend, Remus came out to their parents as gay. He was kicked out of the house on the spot and moved in with Janus. The things Remus told Roman before he left stuck with him, and Roman had a lot of long thinking sessions about the LGBT community and accepting people despite what he’s been taught his whole life

That’s when Roman meets Patton. Roman goes up to Patton to talk to him because Patton is openly gay at school as well, except no one really messes with him because he’s always been kind of a popular boy. Patton helped Roman push aside all he was taught until Roman was able to message Remus saying he accepted him, and also come to terms with the fact that he was ALSO not straight, but also not cis either

Roman moved out of his parent’s house at 18 and moved in with Patton. He never came out to his parents. He transitioned, started testosterone, and went to college as a linguistics major (though I might change his major honestly). Then, Patton drags him to a pride club where he meets Logan again. Logan is now a lot more proud and dresses the way they want, looks more confident, but most of all, doesn’t recognize Roman at all after his transition. But Roman never forgot

So a lot of their friendship at first is Roman trying to make Logan’s life easier after all the damage he caused, while also realizing that Logan is an amazing and smart person. And both of them catching feeling for each other gets…pretty damn messy honestly

I would explain more about their actual relationship but this is already super long, so just let me know if you wanna know more

[little-kat07]

here we go. another hour at this. sigh.

bullet, i hate the gaps but need it to look right.

okay so. Logan's an ymbryne. he's trans and started his own home as soon as he could, he wanted to make a loop for kids with behavioral issues. i haven't decided which bird he would be, but he would be known as "Mister [type of bird]" - ymbrynes can change into their respective bird, for example Miss Peregrine being able to turn into a peregrine

the twins and Remy were the first to arrive. the twins were causing problems with their abilities, while Remy was just a huge bitch

okay so now to go into their abilities. - Remy has omnilingualism (ability to understand any language) - he really doesn't think much of his ability, he was never interested in talking to animals - of course that is until Emile and Patton come, who are crazy interested in talking to animals and Remy likes friends - next are the twins, who are actually born two months apart (Roman is older) - Remus is the product of an affair, which Roman uses against him when he's angry - Roman has pyrokinesis (ability to manipulate fire) and Remus has cryokinesis (ability to manipulate ice) - the twins are physically 16, while Remy is 17

after those three, Janus comes. he's 18, the oldest of all of the wards. he's part snake, with patches of scales and a forked tongue. he and Remus are fast friends and don't cause any trouble at all (sarcasm) - he's also kinda friends with Remy, they kinda have a rivalry, Its A Thing

after Janus, Virgil comes. Virgil is physically 5, Roman and Remus take an immediate liking to him and about a month after he comes, they "adopt" him as their brother - obviously Virgil has a very fun time being played with constantly, that's actually the twins' main chore - Virgil has unlocking abilities, he can unlock anything. this was a problem because, being so mentally young, he didn't understand privacy and didn't exactly listen to anyone

after Virgil, Patton and Emile come. (they're siblings and Emile refused to leave Patton's side) - Emile has no behavioral issues, just Will Not leave Patton - Emile has telepathy, so he can basically read thoughts, which was a little - Patton is a heart reader, basically meaning he's an empath, but for romance - he can tell when people have feelings for e/o - he HATES his peculiarity because he finds it really useless. he's only ever been interested in love, but he doesn't like knowing something so private - he's sent to Logan because he's severely depressed, he was going around like popcorn and felt like he didn't belong anywhere, plus past trauma with his parents - Patton is physically 16, while Emile is 14

i don't actually really have any decided relationships yet, but I'm thinking Roman and Patton will have a thing, and Remy and Janus might have a thing

i also haven't decided any gender, pronoun, or sexuality things so if you could help w that it would be very appreciated :)

Lumi

So Logan is ftm trans, he/him i'm guessing? maybe biromantic and ace would be cool for him. I think he and emile should have a thing, Emile can be homoromantic and ace. Maybe pangender! (You didn't say what logan's age was so i'm guessing he's around emile's age but idk idk let me know if this is pedophilia that would be bad)

Remy and Janus are both they/them enbies and they're in love i've decided this now. Lots of sexual tension, yes yes

Roman and Patton could both be aro and have a qpr!! I think that would be cute, also patton is a he/they enby and roman is a he/she. Bigender.

Remus is a demiboy and uses he/its. He is romance repulsed aro. Virgil is only five so maybe he's he/him for now but as he gets older and he can understand pronouns better, he would probably be a he/they, and maybe use some neopronouns idk he's tiny tho