#i really really tried to be normal and tk be chill and not annoying

[czterysta]

made edibles with friends a few weeks ago, i have good tolerance so i was just super slow all.of the time

first timer friend had a BAD reaction - like eating a spoonful of the batter and puking all night bad, so i felt like being the most normal person i was like. directing her high af bf to get her a pot and water, and working on getting me and the third friend who was also comically high home

at some point my face started crying, and i tried to ignore it and hold my friends hair as she threw up, but like. if you're crying outta nowhere it makes people kinda notice even if they're high, so I got embarrassed ans started hyperventilating and had to.excuse myself for 4 minutes to calm down

literally this was just my face doing something weird

anwyay then the other cosmically high friend started throwing up, so i got him cleaned up (and the fucking toilet too) and steady on his feet so we could go home, and we went home, and i thought "wow that was an exciting night, but im really glad i was useful and took care of my friends :)"

and today my friend told me i was overbearing, my warning her about possible trip effects beforehand made everything worse, my hovering around and telling people what to do made everyone stressed and that my mental breakdown was also stressful to others

like. god

[lonestarbabe]

I know this was a quick scene but what did you think of the scene where Carlos was upset about forgetting the limes when his parents came over? I saw it as genuine ‘you’ve got to be kidding me- I expected this night to go smoothly and for us to have everything we need’ but also a bit of anxiety in his voice, too. As someone who has anxiety I think Carlos displays anxiety symptoms sometimes. He has nervous fidgets in his hands and body and also his tone changes. I feel like he was frustrated but also maybe nervous/anxious because he wanted the night to just go smoothly. And TK’s response being so chill was simply him (TK) trying to tell Carlos that it’s ok I’m here for you and there’s no need to worry I got your back and then called his dad , who felt that instead of showing up for his son at this important event, he decided to chase something that he has no business chasing 🥲👿 it’s a damn shame how he’s literally never able to show up for TK metaphorically/emotionally and physically/literally unless TK is hurt. But anyway yeah that’s how I interpreted that scene. His parents don’t seem annoyed that there’s no limes I’m sure they would have been fine with another drink or no drinks at all and they know Carlos, so they didn’t say much else that would cause him to be more frustrated or anxious. I know when I get rly anxious sometimes I have a similar tone to how Carlos was - to where it sounds tight and annoyed but it’s just because I’m so anxious and I don’t know how to express and deal with my emotions. Maybe I’m reaching idk but I feel like that scene with Carlos was a mix of genuine annoyance/frustration at not being prepared with everything his parents could want when they came over but also anxiety that the night wouldn’t go as smoothly as he (and TK) wanted . I also think TK can be anxious at times and maybe have anxiety himself too so maybe that’s why he was also super chill about it and sweet in reassuring Carlos. Because I see some anxiety in him too. But yeah just my opinion

Yeah, I didn’t take it as an overwhelmingly anxious scene, as in that was the overarching feeling I got watching it, but there were definite moments that caused me to sense anxiety and the lingering tension between the characters.  I do think there is some anxiety there beneath the surface and part of that nervousness is normal but I think there’s definitely some fueled by Carlos’ complex relationship with his parents. That anxiety increases as the scene goes on, and honestly, it’s a good build up to the drama that follows (even though I didn’t particularly like the drama with Owen). Carlos does get anxious from what we’ve seen (and to some extent everyone does, but you do see him getting fidgety, and his parents, his dad especially brings that out of him more, which says A LOT and it shows that his anxiety sometimes goes beyond the normal anxiety that comes from being human). But yeah, I agree with the tight tone saying a lot, and I think you’re right to say that the tone suggests both annoyance and frustration as well as that underlying anxiety that the night won’t go well! Because, ultimately, it is not the limes that Carlos is upset about. It is what those limes represent that bothers Carlos.

We’ve certainly seen Carlos’ relationship with his parents become easier, but I would guess that there is some degree of anxiety there. Years of that “silence” after he came out aren’t just going to go away, so I liked how they showed him being really vibrant with his parents and they seem really close, but there’s still a little bit of tension there in some of Carlos’ more discreet gestures. I do think Carlos was genuinely frustrated about the limes because it’s hard to make a margarita without limes! The limes are impeding on the perfect evening that Carlos has planned (and we can see several times as in the date with TK gone wrong how Carlos really fixates on the details and wants to make special occasions perfect. Also, just as TK got kidnapped, he had that perfect dinner go cold as well, so no wonder he has a little anxiety dkjsklsdj. The man works so hard to make meals and they keep going terribly! And Owen is gonna mess up this one too!) Carlos wants things to go well, and that pressure would naturally cause anxiety, and then, when the first move he makes is to get his guests drinks, and that goes wrong, it’s no wonder he feels upset!

And I think this frustration may be amplified by nerves about his parents. His dad was the one who initially suggested the margarita, while his mom went along with it. Thus, it makes me feel that maybe the real anxiety is that Carlos is afraid of disappointing his father. Not being able to give a margarita to his father in some ways could equal being a disappointment in Carlos’ anxious mind. The scene also makes it clear that what Carlos is anxious about is only in his head, as anxiety often is. His parents laugh off the forgotten limes, while TK makes that comment to express that they can deal with it and his tone is also very lighthearted.

TK surely has his own anxiety related to his dad, but I think Carlos is more generally anxious of the pair, while TK is more easy going (though, sometimes he used that easy going nature to cover up how he is really feeling, which perhaps he inherited from Owen). And I think having anxiety at least someone caused by their dads is something both TK and Carlos share, even though the way they handle that anxiety and the way it influences them is so different. And Owen is once again going to let TK (and Carlos) down with the dinner. Owen’s gotten himself into trouble, and that’s going to interfere with Tarlos’ dinner plan in the episode to come. Poor Carlos. Just let him have one peaceful dinner that doesn’t have to be anxiety filled!

So what all this is to say is that I think you make a lot of good points here, and it’s interesting to see the anxious tendencies in Carlos and see how he deals with them and what times they most show up (and I’d argue they most show up with his father, but that’s debatable). I do think he has anxiety, and I think much of that stems from a feeling of inferiority and never being able to live up to what his father wants (that line about his father thinking he was too soft to be a cop is one that highlights these insecurities well). He wants to prove himself, so he tries to make everything perfect, but when things don’t go to plan, while forgotten limes may not seem cosmically important, they sure can sour a perfect plan and trigger an anxiety spiral!