#i really need to stop posting all my best material on discord
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#🐉#i really need to stop posting all my best material on discord#but they really named that shop torture tavern... fate worse than death food...#the silt verses
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would you mind elaborating a bit more on the c!phil and c!techno post? not saying you’re wrong in the least, it’s just an interesting opinion I haven’t seen before! I was curious about the reasons?
*waddles in* okay im finally back from class and have a real keyboard to use for this yeehaw
to keep my feelings brief cuz im aware im biased- inniter both proud and shameful ✊😔- there's a trend i've noticed about certain types of content recently that has some symmetry to what was going on at the beginning of the year. but unlike those few months ago, most people seem to be reacting positively to today's stuff
the bedrock bros arc in particular had a lot of discourse surrounding it, especially after the mutual betrayal. many c!tommy fans would rightfully point out how it was a lil eff'ed up that c!techno kind of sort of lied to c!tommy about his real intentions and was dodgy when c!tommy tried pointing out how that's not what he wanted to do ("we'll smooth out the finer details later" or w/e the quote was)
in response, it felt like a cacophony of people claimed how techno was his own character, that he didn't need to be some random kid's caretaker, to the point that the whole "characters shouldn't be judged by how they treat c!tommy" take was created
nowadays i'm seeing c!rivals duo material come out of the woodwork like a flood. a lot of people want c!dream to join the syndicate, have him heal out in the tundra with c!techno after the piglin breaks him out of pandora's vault and away from his torture
now, there are quite a few reasons why i and many others aren't a fan of this idea, but this post is about how c!techno shouldn't be reduced down to any character's therapist! he has his own plotlines with his own motivations, certainly, those same people will at least point out that c!dream fans want a similar story that c!tommy fans did back in december and january, right?
😐
then there's the man the myth the legend c!philza himself, coining the title schrodinger's father for a good few months. with the canonicity of the sbi family dynamic being somewhat wonky (not deconfirmed however), people split harshly into two categories: those who liked the idea of c!phil still being c!tommy's father, and those who very very very much did not
regardless of people's true opinions on the matter, c!tommy fans (fairly) pointed out that c!phil destroying the kid's home right in front of him was a little messed up. c!phil was canonically aware that c!dream was up to something funky, yet he still went through the idea of teaming up with him to raze l'manberg into the ground, which stung c!tommy enthusiasts a little. who wouldn't be just a smidge butthurt about something like that happening to their fave?
like clockwork, lots of people criticized and even outright bemoaned this train of thought. c!phil isn't even c!tommy's father who cares! he certainly doesn't need to, stop making everything about the kid! y'all just have daddy issues and are projecting tbh 🤪
now back to the prison arc, we yet again return to the potential plot of syndicate!dream, where he'll be best buddies with c!emerald duo and c!niki will spoonfeed him while he recovers (yes this is a /srs headcanon i saw) and c!ranboo will just have to "get over" his fear of c!dream to see they're actually best buds (another /srs comment someone made yes that is word-for-word what it said)
essentially, someone in discord shared a tweet that was basically talking about the idea of c!techno shoving c!dream into c!phil's lap saying "here, be a father whether you like it or not" and, well, i got somewhat peeved if that untagged post i made is anything to go by
it's starting to feel more and more like people didn't actually care that others were writing c!techno and c!phil in caretaker roles, they only cared that c!tommy was the one being taken care of. because c!tommy is apparently the literal spawn of satan and is the worst thing to happen to the dsmp and is super annoying and blah blah
but instead of, idk, admitting that c!tommy just wasn't their fave and moving on from content they didn't like, they needed to create these excuses about how it was actually super awful that these fans were doing things like this, that you should feel bad if you support this kind of content because you are ruining these characters and everything they stand for
nevermind that this kind of stuff has been a normal occurrence in fandoms since fandoms have been a definable thing, that while yes it gets annoying how certain characters are favored above all others literally all you're achieving by tearing down someone else's work is that same person either A.) making more of that stuff out of spite or B.) potentially quit making stuff for the fandom altogether
it's just... it sucks, that it feels like you can't want anything nice for c!tommy without it getting called "ooc" or being accused that you only watch his POV and make everything about him. maybe i'm sensitive, maybe im extrapolating, but i wouldn't be the only one who is, considering i've seen multiple others voice similar feelings regarding this situation
so there we have it i guess. my brief words that ended up not being brief at all (so sorry dear anon, i really did try to keep this down to one page at most :headinhands:) and i hope they make at least some partial sense, now i gotta go read even more random shit for my hw fsndkfjndf save me /lh
#dsmp critical#fandom critical#c!techno critical#c!phil critical#c!dream critical#negative#discourse#answered ask#anonymous
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Love For The Faceless
Corpse Husband x Youtuber!Reader(Female)
Warnings: Swearing
Genre: Fluff
Summary: Y/N is a YouTube gamer who has recently gained a much larger following thanks to the streams she does with her friends. Naturally, considering her faceless and bodiless nature, people are starting to get curious about her. When she finally follows her friend Corpse’s example, a lot more than her hands is revealed.
Requested by anon, you know who you are 😉 Thank you so much for placing a request and hope this fic fulfills the expectations you have for it.
“Hey!“ I greet the lobby as I finally hop into the Discord call after quickly saying ‘hi‘ to my audience.
I’ve been a YouTuber for four years now and I’ve only recently started streaming, encouraged to do so by my best friend Rae. She’s the one who got me in multiplayer games such as Among Us and Phasmophobia which led me to meet her amazing gaming squad that consists of some of the most famous names on the platform. They are all wonderful people and I will forever be in Rae’s debt for introducing me to them. However, becoming friends with Felix, Sean and the rest of the team brought not only a more fulfilled life, but also a small boost in following. Who am I kidding, it wasn’t small. It was overwhelming, terrifying even.
My YouTube channel had a little over a million subscribers at the start of quarantine and now....now it’s closer to three million. Speaking of three million, I’m about to reach it any day now and it’s really hard to believe. I’m a gaming youtuber and I’ve never considered changing my genre despite expecting to not get any attention whatsoever, with all the big names on the platform. I was convinced not even as many as a hundred people would stumble across my videos and now here we are.
My OG subscribers are very supportive of my sudden growth and are defending me when my newer fans ask for a face reveal or whatnot. While we’re on that topic I might have to mention that not even my YouTube friends, and that includes Rae have seen my face. I’ve been faceless and bodiless for the entirety of my time on social media. Some claim I do it to grab more attention or for dramatic effect, but the reason is beyond that. I’m not shallow. Actually, shallow people are the reason I don’t show my face. I’ve never been the prettiest, but my middle school bully thought that I wasn’t lacking self confidence enough. As a result, I ended up with a not so handsome scar on my right cheek that starts from the corner of my mouth and nearly misses my eye. Yeah, it’s a long and pretty noticeable scar that has thankfully become less and less obvious as the years have progressed. Still, it’s not something I’d like to show to my viewers.
Eight ‘hi’s greet me back, each making my smile grow wider. “Sorry I’m late guys. Technical difficulties.”
“Don’t worry.“ Rae’s voice dominates over the rest, “Corpse still isn’t here so we’re waiting for him.“
I mute myself on the Discord call and take a look at my comments. I’m most flattered by the comments about my voice. Seeing as how they don’t have much to compliment about me other than my content, they make the nicest comments about my voice, personality and humor. Those comments are the ones who warm my heart most. Even when people in my day to day life compliment my appearance I can’t find it in me to believe they are being genuine. I’d like to believe these amazing people are being one hundred percent honest when they tell me they like me for who I am and not for what I might look like.
“Sorry I’m late guys.“ A deep voice causes me to even physically jolt, switching my focus from the comments to the Among Us lobby where my eyes land on the newly materialized black avatar.
“Hi Corpse.“ Rae greets him.
“Hello mister who broke Twitter!“ Sean laughs, provoking the laughter of the rest of the players.
“Yeah, congratulations man. That’s a big deal.“ Felix chimes in.
“Thanks guys, but I think you’re forgetting we’re talking about a picture of my hand.“ Corpse chuckles timidly. I have noticed how shy he gets when someone gives him a compliment - like a snail slowly withdrawing in its shell. I find it adorable.
“That’s what makes it even better!“ I unmute my mic, sending my own congratulations.
“While we’re on that topic...“ Rae begins, waiting for the rest of us to shut our traps, suggesting she has something important to say. “Y/N, do you ever plan on doing a reveal like that? Not a face reveal. Just a body part reveal.“
I have no problem talking about the subject with friends but I get nervous when I’m supposed to discuss it with my fans. Seeing as how everyone, including myself, is streaming right now, I get a bit of a stutter in my speech. “Haven’t thought about it yet. But I guess a body part reveal is harmless.” I cringe immediately after letting the words leave my mouth, “That sounds so weird.”
Rae knows that I’m not too fond of my face, but I haven’t told her about my scar yet. I let almost all people I’ve met online think I’m using my lack of appearance for effect. For the mystery of it all. Mysteries attract people which equals attention. Attention equals views and the domino effect continues.
“Just a suggestion. No pressure.“ Rae adds quickly, knowing full well I get anxious when the subject is brought up in front of cameras. “Let’s get this game started, shall we.”
* * *
The idea dwells in my mind, sitting on the back burner even after I disconnect from the Discord call. I’m sitting in my gaming chair, which was a gift for my two million milestone, and weighing out the pros and cons of the action Rae suggested I take.
“It’s a picture of your fucking hand, dummy. How bad can it turn out?“ I say out loud, shaking my head at my indecisiveness. “You’ll be fine.”
In a blur, two pictures are already posted on my Instagram. The first one captioned ‘Took a leaf from my friend’s book. Did I do it right @ corpsehusband?’ and the second ‘Thanks, Rae. These are on you.’
Rae’s POV
As I’m watching a movie in my living room, I get a notification from Instagram, informing me that Y/N has posted for the first time in a while.
I scoff, “More like the first time in forever.”
The first thing that comes to my mind is the possibility of her reaching that three million milestone that’s been long time coming. I bring the glass of water that’s sitting on my coffee table to my lips, taking a sip as I tap the notification. The picture I see makes me hurry to put the glass back down so I don’t drop it. Y/N’s hand. Her fingers are covered with several thin rings each. And here I thought Corpse had too many rings, this girl has at least two on every finger!
Then my eyes land on the second picture she has posted only minutes after the first and my heart drops. I struggle to get the water that’s been sitting in my moth down my esophagus while my mind is struggling with the task to comprehend the picture I’m looking at.
Another hand is resting on top of Y/N’s. A hand also covered in rings but fewer and larger. The nails are painted black.
I think I know who it belongs to.
Before I can even finish the thought, I’m dialing Y/N. She picks up after the second ring, sound cheery as ever as she greets me. “Hey Rae!”
“Don’t you ‘Hey Rae’ me!” I practically scream. I hate being kept in the dark about anything ever so this is just driving me mad. On top of all, she’s my best friend, for fuck’s sake. “Is that Corpse in the photo with you?!”
“Ugh....“ the cheeriness to her voice is all but gone now.
I go on with my rant, not giving her the time to reply. Not that she would reply. I bet she doesn’t know what to say. “So he knows where you live?! Or was the picture taken at his place?! He knows what you look like?! You have seen him! He has seen you in real life but me, your best friend, haven’t!!! You are breaking Covid 19 protection laws to take pictures?! Are you fucking serious, Y/N?!”
There’s a long moment of silence which frustrates me even more but I literally have run out of things to yell and the power to be angry. I mean, I still am, I just can’t express it.
“Rae, sweetheart, please calm down. You’re scary when you’re mad.“ This girl has some fucking nerve! She’s on the verge of laughing!
“Listen here you...“
“Rae, please stop scaring my girlfriend.“ That oh so distinguishable, oh so familiar voice interrupts me.
I am flabbergasted, for a lack of a better term.
“Now that we’ve got you quiet, I can explain.“ Y/N pics up the conversation, “Corpse and I have been dating for six, almost seven months now. We started dating around Easter after talking for quite some time. We moved in together at the end of September. All thanks to you, Rae. You’re the best.” She pauses to breathe in real quick, “There, all caught up?“
I’m in no less shock than I was before she explained. Actually, I think I might be even more confused now. It all just feels like a fever dream. “Yes...no. I don’t fucking know! I need details, Y/N!”
“Details later.“ Corpse makes his presence known once again, “We’re watching Family Guy right now. Talk to you later.“
“Love you, Rae!“ Y/N calls out before the line goes dead.
My arm goes limp, dropping my phone on the couch next to me.
“Motherfuckers” I mumble under my breath.
Y/N’s POV
It’s been a week since Rae has stopped talking to both Corpse and me. I know she just needs some time to cool off. In the meantime, the rest of our friends were informed and, as oppose to Rae, were nothing but supportive and overjoyed. I bet Rae feels the same way though. Sean, Dave and the rest of the gang have confirmed that she’s incredibly happy for us and says she noticed a spark between me and him since day one, but she can’t help but be mad at us, and especially me, for not telling her sooner.
“Any regrets?“ I remember Corpse asking me when we hung up on her after dropping the bomb.
“Not being able to see her face when she saw the picture.“ I beam at him, feeling as content as ever.
He laughs, agreeing with me before leaning down to kiss me.
@susceptible-but-siriusexual @simonsbluee @save-the-sky @hacker-ghost @itsminniekat @bi-andready-tocry @imtiredaffff @jazzkaurtheglorious @hereforbeebo @fandomgirl17 @chrysanthykios
#corpse#corpse husband#corpsehusband#husband#corpse husband fanfic#corpse simp#corpse husband fanficiton#corpse fanfiction#corpse fanfic#corpse x reader#corpse husband x y/n#corpse husband x reader#x reader#reader#request#requests open
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Being Human - Chapter 24 (END)
<= Chapter 23
Summary : Snatcher meets familiar people again Also available on AO3 : https://archiveofourown.org/works/24826561/chapters/75085263
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(TW injury)
New chapter today, and it's actually the 24th and the 25th combined. It's 15 pages long, now.
I could only draw a picture for them both, so I supposed it was useless to keep you waiting for nothing. So, yeah, here's the ending of "Being Human". I hope you'll like it !
The “Oh The Humanity” AU belongs to @doodledrawsthings !
Uh if you’re interested, I post my progress on my chapters on Hatty Fan Time (the AHIT Discord server I’m moderating with two friends), so if you wanna join, go ahead !
Happy reading !
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Chapter 24 : “ Is… Is it over? ”
Snatcher was doing his best to walk down the hallways as quietly as he could. His ankle, while not broken anymore, was still giving him quite a lot of pain, so much that he was wincing at each new step. But he knew this was just temporary and that he needed to ignore the suffering for now: Vanessa was busy, sure, but for how long? She had said she would be baking cookies for him, and he knew very well that this wouldn’t last forever. This was his first and last chance of escaping: if she spotted him trying to leave, the child had no doubt she would lock him up again, perhaps in the cellar once more…- The young Prince shook his head and gulped down with difficulty. This definitely wasn’t something he wanted to think about.
Snatcher could feel and hear the floor creaking under his feet, forcing him to stop several times and listen closely. But thankfully, there was no sound indicating the Queen had heard him. Thank God. The child stopped in front of the door leading to the first floor- oh, he was not reassured, not in the slightest, he had the feeling this would not go well… As he was going to open the door, however, a light sound caught his attention, making him look at the window. A look of confusion crossed the young man’s features: there was nothing there, so what could have made such a nois- but then, his eyes spotted something: a little rock had been thrown onto the glass, making a small sound because of the impact. Detaching himself from the door, Snatcher made a few silent steps to the window… And his face lightened up with shock and surprise as he noticed a form floating above the window- no, two forms, actually.
Moonjumper and the hatted brat !
A feeling of hope grew inside of him, just as a wave of relief washed over him: they were alive! He had saved them! He really had managed to help them!
The child stepped closer to the window and reached for it, trying to open it- but in vain. The frame was deeply frozen, preventing anyone to open it, especially not a kid like him. He quickly stopped, as his attempts at opening it were quite… Noisy. It was getting really dangerous, and if he kept on trying, he was eventually going to alert Vanessa, which was definitely not what he wanted.
Moonjumper and the kid floated closer, a clear look of worry and confusion on their faces. The hatted girl gestured to the lock on the window, but Snatcher replied by shaking his head. It wasn’t locked, just… Frozen. He gave a concerned shrug, indicating he didn’t really know how to help them enter the manor. And, of course, they couldn’t really communicate vocally through the glass, as it was sure to be noticed by his ex. So that wasn’t a solution- until one hit him, making his eyes widen.
The attic.
Driven by a new motivation, the child pointed up, trying to make them understand his idea. The hatted brat seemed rather confused and frowned in reaction, trying to look up without understanding. However, the corpse seemed to get it and explained it to her- or so Snatcher believed. He couldn’t really hear them, so all he could do was to guess. In any case, his counterpart nodded to him, as a way to show him they had understood what he had meant to them. Not long after that, they started to float higher, indeed reaching the attic.
There was his escape plan !
Fueled by a new motivation, especially now that he knew his friends were alive, the former ghost turned away from the window, a new objective in mind. Still doing his best to remain discreet, Snatcher walked the other way, making his way to the attic rather than to the first floor. He was particularly on edge, especially when it came to his own footsteps on the floor, and to the creaking of the parquet floor under his weight. When he reached the door leading upstairs, he kept praying for it to be unlocked, oh, he prayed so much- and when the doorknob actually let itself be lowered, thus opening the door… A huge feeling of relief hit the young Prince one more time.
Oh, thank God…
Looking behind him, just to make sure the Queen hadn’t come upstairs to see if he was still in the nursery… He eventually climbed up the stairs, not forgetting to close the door slowly in his back. This was it, there was no turning back now.
Snatcher soon reached the attic door and opened it, his vision greeted by the sight of an old, forgotten room. But the former ghost didn’t lose any time in looking around- there was no time for that. All he needed to do now, was to find a way to let the other two-
Speaking of the devil, Snatcher spotted their floating silhouette right in front of the central window. However, it was safe to assume than opening any of the window here would be complicated. After all, none of them had locks to begin with, so even if they weren’t as frozen, they couldn’t be opened either way.
That… He hadn’t thought of that, exactly. All he had thought about was to get farther away from Vanessa, which worked in that case. But he still couldn’t leave like this… As for Moonjumper and the hatted brat, the two were inspecting each window, trying to find one that could be opened easily, in vain. Snatcher stepped closer to the central window, the gears in his mind turning to find a solution. This was… Not going the way he wanted to, he had to admit that much. His eyes met the others’, and they both came to the same conclusion.
Leaving the manor this way wouldn’t-
Snatcher’s thoughts were instantly interrupted as a tremor shook him and the room, making him stumble to the wooden floor. He cried in pain as it only hurt his already injured ankle, but before he was even able to realize what was going on, a loud, piercing scream echoed in the whole manor. Immediately, the young Prince’s expression fell, only to be replaced with panic.
Vanessa.
As on cue, the former ghost heard her muffling yelling in the floor below- oh God, she had heard him!
-“Where are you?!” shouted the Queen, her tone clearly showing how livid she was, and the sound of her voice making the house shake even more. Oh no, no, no, no, no! Behind the window, Moonjumper and the brat’s face paled up just like his did, and it was obvious they had heard her too. Oh, crap, no, he needed to be out of here!
Not thinking anymore, the child ran to the window, pounding on it as hard he could, feeling dread spreading inside of him as he could hear Vanessa’s furious steps coming closer and closer.
-“Get me out of here!” he yelled through the glass, to his friends on the other side, fear more and more audible in his voice than ever: “Help me!” Tears started to fill his eyes, and he couldn’t tell if it was because he was in a child’s body or if it was because he was genuinely terrified.
Behind the glass, Moonjumper seemed to be just as scared as him, and was scratching at the glass, even pounding on it all while still holding the hatted kid. The latter seemed to be more than nervous, looking for a solution too, until… Her face lit up, as if she just had had an epiphany. The young Prince saw her shouting something at the corpse, pointing at the window at the same time. What was she suggesting? But as he was asking himself that question, Snatcher saw the two of them floating away from the window- no, no, no! They weren’t leaving him here, weren’t they ?! They couldn’t do that, they couldn’t abandon him!
-“Come back!!” he yelled, and now tears were rolling down his cheeks, sobs cutting his breathing short: “Don’t leave me here!” He pounded on the glass harder, despair filling him whole. No, this couldn’t be happening, this couldn’t be happening!
His cries intensified as Vanessa’s steps could be heard just behind the door, and suddenly, he froze. The footsteps had stopped. He looked back at the door in utter terror and saw the door slowly opening, a claw being the first thing he saw coming out of it.
-“I told you…” her tone was low and threatening, and the child span around, horrified. Oh no, no, no- : “… That there would be consequences…” And little by little, the old Queen’s body appeared in the room, her dark aura even more visible than ever, her claws sharper, and her eyes murderous.
Oh no, he was going to die, he was so going to die, he-
-“Snatcher!” The former ghost’s terrified inner-rambling was put to an end as he heard his name being called out behind him, and he glanced back, recognizing the brat’s voice- didn’t they leave, though…? However, his eyes widened as he saw the hat-wearing child being carried by Moonjumper on his shoulders, both at a distance from the window, and what caught his attention was… That she was not wearing her usual hat.
She was wearing another one, one that was familiar because he had seen her wearing in his forest, when she was ransacking the tombs in Subcon For- and before his mind had the time to finish that sentence, a glowing potion materialized in the kid’s hand, and she shook it while urging him to move with the other.
The young Prince didn’t waste any more time and ran to the side, hiding behind a nearby crate not to feel the explosion, and he covered his ears. But just before he was able to, the Queen’s voice echoed in the room, giving him chills.
-“I saw you!” she yelled at him, as if she hadn’t noticed the two outside- but it was most likely the case, as her mind seemed to be only focused on him, and only him… Which was not reassuring in the slightest, obviously.
-“Come here this instan-” And then, her shout was cut short by an explosion, and Snatcher just curled up more, crying out in fear as the whole floor shook again and as he heard the loud and deafening sound of the detonation. Glass and wood flew everywhere, shattering and breaking at their impact to the floor. Panicked, the former ghost glanced back at the window that had just been exploded- and his eyes widened as he saw his two friends entering the room through the large hole caused by the explosion.
Another wave of relief hit him once more, contrasting greatly with the spike of fear he had felt earlier- Snatcher felt like his heart was riding a very, very intense roller-coaster. As soon as the hatted child spot him, hidden behind the crate, her expression instantly turned into worry, and she dashed to him, soon placing herself in a position to defend him should Vanessa decide to attack them first. She had taken out her umbrella, ready to fight with all of her might, determination visible on her face. As for Moonjumper, the corpse was summoning countless strings, preparing himself for an imminent fight. His face looked nothing like what Snatcher had seen before, it was full of anger, of bravery, of courage… But also full of fear. His hands were trembling, his eyes were fixed on the Queen, while many memories of Snatcher’s past life seemed to be blinding him, forcing him to relive past moments that weren’t even his in the first place.
And yet Moonjumper was still ready to fight despite this.
-“You…” The Queen’s voice was full of hatred as she recognized the duo she had frozen earlier. Her intonation definitely had an impact on them, as they both faltered for a few moments- and he couldn’t blame them for it.
He knew what it was like to be frozen to death.
-“You… You will not hurt anyone else,” Moonjumper trembling voice echoed in the room, and it was now clear that he was scared to no end, though he was still trying to appear brave. Whether it was bluff or not, Snatcher couldn’t tell… But he really hoped it wasn’t.
-“Yeah, back off!” added the brat, lifting her umbrella as a way to show she was not kidding. Then again, the former spirit couldn’t help but wonder if they really had a chance against someone who had already frozen them all at least once.
Vanessa glared at them, her eyes glancing to each other, as if she were trying to determine who, out of the trio, was the biggest threat to her. And, unsurprisingly… Her survival instincts told her to attack Moonjumper first. Screaming in absolute anger, she stomped her feet on the wooden floor, summoning ice all around her and, more precisely, a series of ice stalagmites which she quickly sent to her enemy’s direction.
-“Moonjumper!” yelled Snatcher, extending his hand to the corpse, only to be held back by the hatted brat, preventing him from getting himself hurt. Fortunately, the body-stealing spirit had been expecting her to target him first, and dodged her attack, though one of the stalagmites nearly touched him. Thank God it hadn’t. The corpse was quick to react though and counter-attacked, throwing all of the strings he had prepared to her. Taken aback by his sudden retaliation, the Queen was too slow to move before the strings actually caught her, Moonjumper quickly tightening the grip around them.
But this couldn’t be so simple.
Another scream left Vanessa’s mouth and soon enough, she turned the strings into ice, her magic rapidly going up the corpse’s strings and thus soon reaching him- until the hat-wearing brat intervened, hitting the strings with her umbrella, deflecting the spell to her umbrella instead, which she immediately let go of with a surprised cry.
Now that the trio was distracted with the current turn of event, the Queen broke free of the strings holding her, the ice having made them easy to break. No, this was not good, they had to find a solution… But Moonjumper’s strings were their best bet! Fighting hand-to-hand was not possible, all they could do was fighting her from afar, if they didn’t want to end up frozen to death. His eyes looked around, trying to find an idea, something they would be able to use to gain an advantage against that monster. The crates, no, the chandelier, no, too heavy to make it fall down and too large to be useful… And his eyes fell onto the huge gap in the floor and the wall, caused by the previous explosion. His eyes widened, an idea growing in his mind.
Maybe… Maybe they could be able to use that!
In the meantime, the fight had continued, and the corpse was still trying to immobilize her with his strings- but this wasn’t the right option, this wouldn’t work like this! The woman was always managing to break free. And so, as soon as Vanessa’s attention was at the lowest, the young Prince took this as an opportunity to call out to Moonjumper without putting him too much at risk:
-“The- the hole, lead her to the hole!” he shouted, using both of his hands as a way to make his voice louder. The corpse gave him a quick and confused glance, as if he were trying to understand what Snatcher had in mind- until his eyes widened, realization crossing his features. He had gotten the message.
Not wasting any more time, the corpse changed his tactic and instead of trying to keep her trapped and motionless… He tried to pull her closer to the window, floating back more and more. Of course, the Queen was always managing to get free with her powers, but she was still being slowly led to the huge gap in the floor. The corpse was immensely focused on the fight, doing everything he could to avoid her stalagmites- but his focus and his unbelievable calm was winning over Vanessa’s screaming and aggressive attitude- her attacks were having the same patterns, she was not thinking strategically when trying to hit Moonjumper… On the contrary, Snatcher had to admit she was being predictable, and while she couldn’t be kept trapped in the other’s strings for too long, Snatcher’s strategy was working little by little.
When she reached the gap, her eyes had widened, as if she was only understanding now what the trio had in mind. With another deafening scream, Vanessa created an ice path under her feet, like a bridge above everything, above… Nothing, above the void under her feet. No matter how hard Moonjumper was pulling on her, she was not loosing her balance and she kept on creating ice under her feet, although… Now she was looking to escape much more than actually attacking any of them. Her expression was not just livid anymore- no, there were some worry and fear in it too, now.
They had to take the matter in their own hand, now! Moonjumper had already done much more than Snatcher would have asked of him considering his same fear of her- and now it was his time to help.
Ignoring the pain in his ankle, the child dashed to the frozen umbrella the hatted brat had abandoned on the floor, and picked it up, not caring about the ice partially trapping it- no, this didn’t matter. What he was about to do, however… Mattered much, much more.
-“Snatcher!” he heard the little girl calling him out- but he didn’t stop.
No, this had to stop. Now.
Fueled by a new energy and by adrenaline, the former ghost ran onto the ice platform Vanessa had created… And he charged at his ex-lover, holding the umbrella before him and using him as a spear. He felt his borrowed weapon hit something, and he knew it was her- and almost instantly, a cry of fear and surprise left the Queen’s mouth… And the impact made her lose her balance, her body falling backward as she tried to turn back… But it was too late.
He had done it, he had managed to-
But things never, ever were that easy, were they?
-“Snatcher !!” His friends’ voice echoed behind him, panic clearly audible as the woman made a last movement as an attempt to save herself from her fall- she had grabbed Snatcher’s arm and was now taking him with her, bringing him with her for what was going to be her death… And the young Prince’s.
And now, they were both falling.
Snatcher had thought about dying again, multiple times, actually. Being stuck in his this human body definitely had him wonder a lot of things such as “if I die, would I become a ghost again? Would I just go to wherever souls go when no one eats them?” There had been no way to know, and still wasn’t. The doubt actually prevented him from trying to put an end to his human life and see what happened afterwards. However, now… It wasn’t doubt that was making Snatcher fear death. No…
That was the fear of actually dying, mixed with the fear of losing all the sensations he had become accustomed to, even though it took him so long. Sure, there were plenty of unwanted senses he disliked, but… Was it really worth losing all of it? Even the good ones? Like the feeling of a warm shower, the feeling of lying down on a pile of soft pillows, the feeling of tasting things, even bad things…
Did he really want to just not feel anything at all? It had felt so overwhelming when he had recovered all of his senses, but now, the thought of losing everything was… Just as crushing.
And so… That was why Snatcher was terrified, terrified as his body was falling to his demise, taken with Vanessa. Her claws were gripping at his arm tightly, freezing his clothes and skin, making him cry out in pain. His breath quickened while he felt the cold air outside scratching his cheeks from how fast they were falling.
He didn’t want to die…!
The young Prince started to kick her, trying everything he could to do get away from her- but what was the point if they were both going to die by crashing themselves to the ground?
-“Let me go!” he shouted, his voice hysterical and his expression both panicked and livid: “Let-let go of me!”
-“N-no!” retorted the Queen, and the child could see frozen tears leaving her eyes as well as a despaired expression on her face: “I don’t want to!!”
She tried to hold him tighter in her arms, bringing him for a hug- No, no, no, he didn’t want this, he didn’t want this! The kid kept trying to hit her, his fear growing more and more as they both got closer and closer to the ground- he didn’t want to die! Not like this, not anymore!
Snatcher shut his eyes hard, readying himself for the impact, for the death he had wanted so much and yet didn’t want anymore, for the confirmation of whether he’d come back as a ghost or not, this was not fair, this was not fair…!
The young Prince let out a startled scream when he felt something slipped under his arms, pulling him up and abruptly stopping his fall. Snatcher reopened his eyes instantly- Moonjumper! The corpse had hurled himself towards his small counterpart, barely saving him from his death and quickly trying to float back up again or, at the very least, slow down his dangerous fall.
Vanessa, on the other hand, was not being held by anyone and, thus, her claws severely scratching the child’s arms as she attempted to save herself, but her own weight dragged her down. A loud, painful scream left Snatcher lips as he felt his skin being torn open by her long, sharp claws… But soon enough, his eyes saw her falling down, falling to her death, while Moonjumper was now holding him still in the air, floating. And soon enough… A muffled sound echoed up to them, with the Queen crashed into the snow, creating a flurry of snow around her.
-“Are… Are you okay ?!” the corpse managed to say, panic clearly audible in his tone of voice, his eyes inspecting the young prince, and widening when he noticed the gaping wound on the other’s arm: “O-oh, Goodness, we better… Oh, my God…”
Snatcher only replied by a long hiss, feeling the snowflakes falling onto his injury- oh, that hurt so much…! Tears came back in his eyes, stinging the skin in the corners from how cold it was. Blood was leaking from his arm, falling down near where Vanessa’s body lied down. With a very concerned expression, Moonjumper quickly floated lower and lower, in order to bring them back to the ground. A movement in Snatcher’s vision caught the latter’s attention, and he glanced in that direction, his mind clearly in a state of shock, ready to react to the littlest threat- but what he saw was the hat-wearing brat, watching them from the attic. It was a bit hard to see her clearly because of the distance and the blizzard, but the former ghost was almost sure he saw her putting her hand where her heart was, seemingly sighing in relief.
Yeah… Yeah, he could definitely relate to that…
The young Prince jumped when he finally felt the ground under his feet, letting out a startled cry from how shocked he was. Slowly, ever so slowly, Moonjumper loosened his grip on him, only for Snatcher to fall to his knees, unable to stand up in his state. Around him, the snow was starting to get a reddish hue due to the blood falling and leaking on it, staining it.
-“H-hey…!” The corpse tried to help him get back to his feet, in vain. He had just experienced a near-death experience, how could he stand up again so easily?! His eyes looked around and… Noticed a dark spot in the snow.
Vanessa.
The child stared at her, afraid she’d get up again, ready to attack them again, ready to kill them all- But she wasn’t moving.
-“Is… Is it over?” he breathed out, unable to look away from the old Queen, his fear preventing from doing so.
-“I… I think so, yes,” Moonjumper floated lower, down to his level, his voice calmer and yet his nervousness was still very much there.
A loud noise suddenly caught the duo’s attention, making them lift their head to see what it was- and as much as Snatcher had expected quite a lot of things… Seeing the spaceship flying above their head was not one of these things. That… That was where the bow-wearing kid was! She hadn’t been there in the group’s rescue mission, and it made sense that at least someone had to stay in the ship in case things turned sour.
Not so long after that, the front door of the manor opened abruptly, revealing the hatted brat, soon dashing in their direction.
-“Snatcher!” she called out to him, stopping in front of him and almost slipping from how fast she was running. Her eyes noticed his injury and instant worry appeared on her features: “Oh, peck, are you okay?!”
The child took a moment to pull himself together- this was a lot to take in after all.
-“I… I don’t know,” he gasped, and now that the adrenaline was slowly dying down, the pain was getting much, much stronger. Wincing, Snatcher tried to move his arm, only to whine at the sensation. Yeah, that was not happening… And he was bleeding quite a lot too- oh, no, no, this was not good, was it…?
Another weird, high pitched sound caught their attention, this time behind them. The former ghost turned his head back, not knowing what it was- until he saw a beam of light coming from the spaceship to the ground, a silhouette quickly appearing where the light was touching the snow. The other kid! Even though he knew she had to be safe, considering Vanessa had forgotten about her when she brought the young Prince home, he was… Really happy to see her safe, now. However, something else caught his attention.
She was holding the Time Piece again.
Not wasting any more time, the other joined the trio, reacting the exact same way as the rest of the group did at the sight of Snatcher’s injury. Then again… He had no idea how bad it was, but from the look of everyone else, he could guess that it was… Not good.
-“Is… Is she…?” the bow-wearing child pointed to the Queen’s body, still not moving, except for her shadows, carried away by the wind.
-“I… I’m not sure,” Snatcher confessed, still very much afraid to see her getting up- but she wasn’t.
The group remained silent for a moment, staring at what now seemed to be a corpse- And Snatcher couldn’t help but stand up, his stance unstable and his legs trembling both from the blood loss and from how shaken he still was.
-“W-wait, what are you doing?” called out the hatted brat behind him. Moonjumper also tried to get his attention, his tone much more nervous than the little girl’s. The bow-wearing kid, however, remained silent, paralyzed by the fear of what he was trying to do.
Not listening to the group’s advice to sit back down, not to approach Vanessa, as they didn’t know if she was still alive yet- but he didn’t care. And so, silently if not for the sound of his boots in the snow, the young Prince stopped in front of his ex, looking at her with a deep expression of regret on his face. So this was the end of the story, then? The end of a tale that had lasted for many centuries, of a horrifying nightmare that had caused the death of so many people?
Was that it?
The young Prince jumped a bit when the Queen slowly opened her eyes, afraid she would be ready to fight again- but she didn’t move. Instead… She merely smiled at him, that same smile he had loved for years, that same smile from the person he wanted to marry so many years ago- and before he could realize it, his heart started to ache, his mind filled with bitterness.
-“Oh… Hello,” she greeted him, with a tone that was so familiar, much too familiar- and Snatcher’s face hardened, countless of memories blinding him as they came back to him, almost hitting him like a wave.
This was… Not a good ending for him- a good ending would have been to solve their problems before she caused the freezing, would have been to prevent the deaths of everyone- but this? This was a bittersweet ending.
This wasn’t the ending Snatcher wanted, but in the end… This was the only one he could get.
The light in Vanessa’s eyes became dimmer and dimmer as seconds passed and, soon, the former ghost just knew she had passed away, taking with her the threat she had always represented to Subcon Forest. Now… Now, the forest would be safe again.
-“Sna… Snatcher?” the bow wearing child called out to him again, and when he turned back to her… His cheeks started to sting- he was crying now. Tears, countless of them, were rolling down his cheeks and he couldn’t stop, the emotions flooding his mind, so much that it needed to get out somehow- Sobs started to leave his mouth… Before his legs gave up from the blood loss. Before anyone was able to react, the young Prince fell into the snow, mentally and physically exhausted. The group gathered around him, worry and fear visible on their features. Oh.
Was… Was this going to be it? Was this… The end? His end?
His thoughts were cut short when the bow-wearing kid lifted his hand, putting inside it a cold yet familiar object- the Time Piece.
-“Qu-quick!” she urged him, her face deadly pale: “I… I fixed it while you were fighting her! It’ll save you, but you need to break it and wish to become a ghost again!”
-“Hurry!” the hatted brat insisted, trying to hide her worry behind a mask of determination.
Was… Was it really what he wanted? To come back as a ghost, unable to feel a single thing, good or bad? To remain here for eternity and see the world change without him? To take care of a Forest that no longer needed protection? Was this really what he truly, truly wanted? To live in the past forever?
Snatcher winced at the thought.
He… Wasn’t so sure about becoming a ghost again. He had wanted this so much before, but now… Now, something didn’t feel right about this. Was Vanessa’s death the reason for that? Or had he thought this way for a while, just… Being in denial about all of this?
How could he know? What should he do?
-“Wh-what are you waiting for!” urged Moonjumper, and soon, the kids started to shake him lightly, fearing he would lose consciousness from his injuries, if not worse.
All he wanted… All he wanted was…
Slowly, much too slowly for the taste of the group… The former shade lifted the hand holding the Time Piece, ready to smash it to the ground.
-“I wish to be happy,” he murmured, before finally smashing the hourglass down.
-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-______________________________-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-
-“And then, add a bit of salt- yes, just like that!”
The voice of Cooking Cat could be heard in the kitchen of the spaceship, alongside sounds of something cooking in the background, sizzling on a frying pan. Next to her, a young man was standing up, his right hand holding the tool and the left one putting down a cup of salt. Once done, he grabbed the spatula on the nearby counter and started to move the ingredients around inside of the pan, intensifying all the crackling caused by their cooking.
-“Am… Am I doing fine?” he asked, wincing as he was receiving a few splashes, to the point he was tempted to step back- but he knew better than to do that. Cooking Cat seemed to notice his discomfort and came to her friend’s rescue, covering the frying pan with its lid and then lowering the temperature of the gas stove.
The young man couldn’t help but give an awkward and frustrated smile- well, at least, the food wasn’t burnt -yet-, so there was that!
-“You’re improving day after day,” assured the bipedal cat with a warm expression: “You’ll see, someday you won’t even need me anymore to cook for the girls!” she gave him a friendly tap on the back, though perhaps a bit too strong for the thin man, who stumbled a bit.
-“I doubt that,” he answered, before using an familiar sarcastic tone: “I mean, unless you all want me to burn the ship down, of course. That, I can do!”
The Cat snorted and shook her head, though not out of disapproval.
-“You’re underestimating yourself, you know?” she retorted, a bit amused by his previous words: “It’s only been a few months and you’ve made quite a lot of progress. You might not be the best cook in the world right now, but credit where it’s due, now you can make things that are edible!”
-“Oh man, what an improvement! ‘Poisonous’ to ‘barely digestible’! When do I open a restaurant?” he mocked her, but there wasn’t any real animosity, just friendly teasing… To which he received a light punch on the arm:
-“Oh, hush, you,” she snickered: “You know what I mean!”
The two laughed for a bit, and eventually washed their hands, waiting for the food to finish cooking. They kept doing some small talk as they tidied the kitchen a little bit, cleaning and putting back in cupboards all the tools they had needed to prepare the next meal, which smell was slowly invading the room.
Yeah, he had to admit that at least… Well, the smell was good enough to make him hungry, something that hadn’t been possible a few months back.
The duo’s attention was caught by the door opening, revealing the hatted brat, the bow-wearing kid, and Moonjumper, who had started to wear new clothes, clothes that fitted him and his personality much better.
-“Hey, the food’s not ready yet,” the young man taunted them, giving them a shooing gesture: “Come on, away with you!”
-“Can’t we have at a least a bit?” tried to bargain the bow-wearing girl, putting her hands on her stomach as if she hadn’t eaten anything for the past two weeks- and of course, she was imitated by her older friend: “We’re starving!”
-“Yeah, Snatcher, don’t be such a peck-ne-”
-“Language!” the word came from both Cooking Cat and Moonjumper, who floated closer to Snatcher- although it was clear that from the two of them, the bipedal Cat was the one having the more authority. Perhaps she was kind of like a mother-figure, or at least, that’s what the young man couldn’t help but think of her and what her aura seemed like.
-“Fiiine,” grunted the hatted brat, sighing with exaggeration, before giving the cook the look of a nice and innocent kid in dire need of something: “We’re super hungry though,” she repeated and, as on cue, a gurgling sound echoed in the room, causing everyone to stop talking. Eventually, the bow-wearing child giggled with embarrassment and looked away.
-“Y-yeah, we are,” she confirmed, and Cooking Cat just snorted in response. She moved to one of the cupboards and grabbed three plates and silverware, soon handing them to the little, impatient girls.
-“Listen, let’s set the table, and then we’ll eat, alright?” she told them, and it barely took the kids a couple of seconds to grab all of it and running away with it to the living room.
-“Hey, no running with the knifes!” Snatcher called them out, but all he heard were carefree giggles. Ugh. Kids. And yet, he was smiling.
Cooking Cat snorted again, shaking her head with a warm grin, before glancing at the other two :
-“I better go and help them,” she told Snatcher and Moonjumper: “I mean, not that they’re unable to set the table, but. You know.”
-“Yeah, we don’t want any injury, I got it. I’ll take care of the food in the meantime,” he assured, returning her smile with his own, and leaning against one of the kitchen counters. The Cat thanked him and left the room, leaving the young man and the corpse alone. Snatcher soon got back to work and prepared a few crudités for the first course. Somehow, there was some kind of tension in the room, and that was probably due to the fact that Moonjumper hadn’t followed their friend to help the kids. The silence went on for a few more seconds, and… Yeah, there was definitely something.
-“Anything on your mind?” asked the young man casually, glancing at him briefly while he was cutting the vegetables, doing his best to remain focused on the task at hand- not wanting any injury also applied to him. There were quite a few scars on the former Prince’s fingers, due to him not being careful enough while cutting food. After all, not only had he never cooked for a few centuries as a ghost, but he had never really cooked anything while being alive either… Being part of a royal family had its pros and cons after all.
The corpse seemed to be lost in thought, only to jump slightly at Snatcher’s voice, coming back to reality. Moonjumper looked away, scratching his arm in embarrassment:
-“Am I that obvious?” he asked, an awkward smile on his face.
-“Frankly?” the man raised his eyebrow, before giving the other a smug grin: “You have no idea.”
The two snorted, and it did indeed make the tension go away, if only a little. Snatcher knew something was up, and he waited for his friend to make the first step, not wanting to rush anything. If there was anything being human taught him again, it was being patient. Well… Among a lot of other things, of course. And soon enough… This proved to be the right choice, as Moonjumper spoke once more, giving the former Prince a more serious look:
-“Are you… Are you okay?” was his question, and Snatcher was quite taken aback by it, not really expecting something like this. To be fair, he had thought this would be about Subcon, who was now primarily handled by the corpse, though Snatcher did visit quite a lot. This could have also been about the girls or anything like that, really… But him?
Now that was something he hadn’t seen coming.
The young man’s face showed his surprise and confusion, and he quickly put his attention back on his cutting work. No need to cut a finger because he wasn’t attentive enough… Still:
-“Wh- Yeah, I am?” he replied, puzzled by this sudden question: “Why?”
Moonjumper remained silent for a moment, to the point Snatcher thought this conversation would end here- but the other proved him wrong:
-“It’s just that… You wanted to become a ghost again so much, a few months back,” admitted his counterpart with a wince: “And yet, while you had the opportunity to make this happen, you… Didn’t.”
He paused for a few seconds, as if he were looking for the right words, as if he were walking on eggshells- well, it was a figure of speech, given his lack of legs. In any case…
-“I guess, I just… I just wanted to know if you were fine with it.”
Snatcher stopped his cutting work, his stare lost into space. Yeah, he could see where that was coming from… To be fair, his old self would have probably screamed at him, not understanding why he was still a human despite getting the opportunity to change that, despite getting the chance he had waited for since the moment he woke up in that body.
In that body which reminded him of so many things, some good and some… Bad, very bad. And so, he wasn’t really surprised to see this question coming, especially from Moonjumper, who, well… Shared quite a lot of memories with him, even if they still weren’t the same person. If there was anyone in the world knowing him the best, it was the corpse, no doubt about that.
… Which meant quite a lot, being asked this question by his counterpart.
-“You know… If I had gotten the possibility to turn back into what I used to be when it happened…” started Snatcher, referring to the moment he had been turned into a human, months ago: “… Then I’m pretty sure I’d have taken that opportunity without hesitation.”
-“… So what changed?” retorted the other, though there was no judgment in his tone of voice- just pure curiosity and a lot of concerns.
-“I guess…” the man stopped to think, sighing again, before continuing, his face full of regret: “You know, back there, when I… When I almost died,” he managed to say, his body starting to shake from the emotion and from the memories. Snatcher was… Still trying to ignore them, but despite this, he remained haunted by them, haunted by what had happened, by what could have happened to him and to his friends.
The corpse nodded, silently and gently nudging him into talking once more.
-“I… I realized that I… Didn’t really want to die?” he wondered to himself, having done his best not to think about that whole thing until now, and he shrugged, though it was visible that this was clearly upsetting him: “I just… Understood that if I were to die again, even if I came back as a ghost I would just… Not be able to feel anything at all, you know?”
He glanced back to Moonjumper, and he mindlessly started to rub the counter with his hands, as if he were enjoying the sense of touch for the last time, contemplating what could have been if he had indeed died again that day.
-“That kinda scared me,” he admitted, this time with a frown, because being afraid was still something he didn’t like saying: “And after Vanessa’s death, I guess that I felt… Guilty, but also better? As if, there wasn’t that weight on my shoulder anymore, right? And so… So when Bow gave me the Time Piece, I… Hesitated.”
He couldn’t help but scoff at the idea, now.
-“That’s stupid, right?”
Moonjumper seemed surprised by his words, and he titled his head to the side, confused and a little worried:
-“What do you mean?” asked the other, frowning too.
-“That… That I basically let that hourglass decide.”
-“Oh.”
Realization crossed the corpse’s features and he looked away, maybe feeling foolish for that dumb question. But to Snatcher, it wasn’t one, really. A few minutes passed in pure silence, and Snatcher got back to his cutting work. It took a little while before Moonjumper gathered the courage to speak again, visibly concerned for his friend:
-“And so… Are you happy?” he asked, making a reference to the wish Snatcher had made back then, when he was dying. The memory made the young man wince, and he couldn’t help but clench his fists, doing his best not to let his mind getting overwhelmed at the traumatizing recollection.
But this was a good question. Was he happy? Was he, really? It was quite hard to answer… How could he know? His old lives, as a Prince and as a soul-stealing ghost, were so different than this one that it was barely comparable. However… However, he couldn’t deny how miserable he had felt sometimes, as a spirit guarding Subcon Forest. But now…? While he still had nightmares, and while sensations were still a bit strong… Vanessa wasn’t a threat to Subcon and its inhabitants anymore, he felt free for the first time in centuries, not shackled to a place in order to protect it, no- he was really, truly free. Furthermore…
Snatcher had two people to care about now.
-“You know, it’s not so bad,” he eventually replied, a smile starting to appear on the corner of his lips.
-“What is?”
The young man turned his head to his friend, his smile widening, even though his expression still showed some regrets:
-“Being Human.”
The corpse fell silent, but eventually returned his smile, visibly satisfied with the answer. The duo’s attention were brought back to reality as a smell of something burning started to float in the room-
-“Oh fu- peck!” the former prince cursed as he turned off the gas stove, quickly removing the frying pan and putting it on the kitchen counter. His face fell when he noticed the meal had burnt- again. Next to him, Moonjumper was trying his best not to laugh, leading the young man to glare at him. Instantly, the corpse looked away innocently, whistling- ugh, that guy.
Snatcher looked at the burnt meal with frustration, and he rubbed his eyes- Yeah, he was getting tired of himself quite a lot, when it came to cooking. Nonetheless, he took a deep breath, and picked the frying pan again, while Moonjumper, still giggling, grabbed the plates of crudités. Both left the kitchen, and Snatcher lifted the pan for everyone to see, announcing loudly and comically:
-“Soooo, who wants some burnt food?”
A loud series of boo welcomes him, as well as some “again??”s, making him snicker in reaction… But yeah.
Being Human wasn’t so bad.
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Thank you for following me this far, I hope you liked this story ! My next fanfiction, still on AHIT, is a WIP for now. I hope you'll like it too. See you soon !
#A Hat In Time#ahit#a hat in time fanfiction#ahit fanfiction#ahit fanart#my art#snatcher#The snatcher#ahit snatcher#ahit the snatcher#queen vanessa#vanessa#a hat in time vanessa#ahit vanessa#BH#erekio bh#Being Human#ahit being human#Oh The Humanity AU#oth#oth au#doodledrawsthings#erekio
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Found//Quackity
Pairing: Quackity x reader
Genre: angst to fluff
Challenge by @svgarbees : A Confession in the Middle Of An Argument
Warnings: yelling, agruments
PART TWO TO FORGOTTEN
It had been two months since you had gotten over Eret, and one month after they broke up with their partner.
You were kind of hopeful, as finally you were going to reconnect, maybe rekindle an old flame. Nervous, you waited for that message, that discord ping, that phone call, but it never came.
Huffing, you stopped looking for his name, you stopped excitedly grabbing your phone to check if he called. You started talking to your best friends, Karl and Quackity.
They were with you when you first saw the message, and even helped you through it. You were glad that they were in your life, knowing you wouldn’t have survived if you didn’t have them.
Now your streams were filled with them, but what chat noticed, was you were with Quackity more, always on his streams or him in yours. Not thinking much of it, you kept on streaming with him.
When you finally noticed, your twitter was filled with it. Ship names and fan art was plastered on your timeline, and you secretly liked it. It made you notice how cute he was, and how much of a dork he could be also.
Smirking, you retweeted an animatic, tagging Quackity in it.
He almost responded instantly, his post only a winking face and nothing else. Smiling, you closed the app heading to stream with him.
Once you turned your computer on, you heard a ping on discord, and thinking it was Quackity, you opened it.
What shocked you was it was the man you never not wanted to hear from. The message only said, “are you busy, we need to talk."
You sighed and called him, fidgeting in your seat.
"Hello?” You heard his calm, deep voice call through your headphones.
“Hi.” You whispered.
“Aren’t you supposed to be streaming?” He asked softly.
“Yep, but I called you first."
"Well, how about I join your stream?” You could hear him smile.
“Uh, i don’t know, Quackity is streaming with me.” You smiled a bit, remembering your interaction a few minutes ago.
“You stream with him all the time, come on, like old times!”
“How about you join me and Quackity?” You tried to reason.
“Fine, what are we doing?” Eret sighed, opening Minecraft.
You told him you didn’t have anything, it was just a chill stream. He nodded and joined VC 1, where Quackity was waiting.
“Hey, Quackity! Eret will be joining today!” You said, the stream already starting.
“Blind Boy, really?” Quackity scoffed, trying to hide his anger.
“Duck Boy.” Eret said monotonously.
You tried to relieve the tension, saying that you needed help, getting netherite.
“Don’t you already have netherite?” Eret asked.
“No, it was destroyed when I was with Quackity once.” You recounted the story, the story itself a dumb one.
“You could just take mine.” Eret moved his character to give you the armor set.
“NO- they want to get it themselves!” Quackity interjected, punching his character.
You just smiled and walked away, not wanting in this argument, but they were arguing the whole time you tried gathering materials. They wanted you to depend on them, but once you found what they were doing, you scoffed and walked away.
After about an hour of this, you were done, ending the stream, saying you had plans. Once you had ended, all three of you sat there.
“Anyways, I think I did well.” Quackity boasted.
“Uh huh, sure.” Eret poked at him, trying to get a reaction.
“Eret..can i talk to you later?” You finally talked, getting a nod from him.
Once he had left, you locked the voice chat.
“Finally! That pinche puta can suck my ass.” Quackity smirked.
“What is wrong with you?” You huffed.
“W-what do you mean?”
“You were..different! Why were you being rude to Eret?”
“Don’t you remember? That’s the bitch that broke your heart!” He said angrily, he didn’t want you to get hurt.
“I know-” You were cut off to Quackity groaning.
“IF YOU KNEW, YOU WOULDN’T HAVE INVITED HIM!” Quackity yelled, making you furious.
“He ASKED, how could i say no?”
“By fucking saying NO, But you’re kissing his ass again, and where is that going to get you?” You were speechless, how could he say that? Of course, he is kind of right, but it still hurt.
“And why does that bother you so much?”
“BBECAUSE I FUCKING LOVE YOU.” Once he said those words, you froze.
Once you mustered the courage, you responded, “What?”
“I love you, [Name], but you were too busy with Eret to notice..am i just a rebound to you?” He whispered.
“No, no, you aren’t. I just..didn’t think anyone else could love me.” You laughed bitterly.
“But i do, like i told you..I don’t want to make you feel forgotten.” Quackity fidgeting nervously.
“I love you too…” You smiled, finally realizing that you were right, you were in love with him. You tried hiding it by going back to Eret, but it was time to find these feelings again.
“You do?” You could hear him smile as he laughed a bit.
“I do..you found me.”
#quackity x reader#quackity x you#quackity imagines#mcyt x reader#mcyt imagine#mcyt x you#mcyt x y/n
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https://celestial-ringleader.tumblr.com/post/658246663116341248/mushroom-cookie-bears-send-me-a-character-and
Remy & Pietro??
@lucifers-favorite-child Buckle in y’all because this is gonna be a long one
Remy LeBeau:
favorite thing about them: So. Many. Things. I can’t decide on one so I’m just gonna list off my top three:
- His entire aesthetic is just so cool to me?? I love the idea of his character, just him being a thief (and an heir to an entire Guild on top of it) but I also like how he’s often seen as siren-like with how he can pull people in and smooth-talk his way out of almost anything. Also his eyes are so fucking cool idc what anyone else says. The black with red sclera is just so awesome.
- His powerset, omg people seriously underestimate what he’s capable of. Some think his power is just throwing explosive cards when it’s so much more than that. Like do you have any idea how useful it could be to manipulate energy?? He could literally make a moving object stop because he can just sap out the kinetic energy within it. On top of that he made a missile explode in Excalibur which I think was an interesting way of using his powers. Also his goddamn reflexes are broken as all fuck, like he can sense a bullet coming even before anyone else notices it and dodge it perfectly. And if he’s quick enough he can hit it back at the person who shot at him. It’s fucking insane. And let’s not forget that in an alternate universe he was able to kill the Dark Phoenix and destroy his whole planet in a fit of his powers overloading. So.
- This is gonna be cheesy, but I love the way he talks. I like how no matter how much time has passed, he hasn’t changed how he speaks and is proud of it. Besides, his accent is just,,,so good.
least favorite thing about them: Aside from the moments where he’s characterized and portrayed poorly, I can’t think of anything.
favorite line: “I ain’t a thief, or an assassin. I’m an X-Man and I’m never comin’ back.” He said that to Belladonna in X-Men: The Animated Series and it stuck with me so much.
But also the line “You need ta get a life. Seriously.” is so good too. Just ANXF in general had a lot of good lines.
brOTP: Oh boy I have so many so I’m listing them off:
-Remy & Ororo Monroe
-Remy & Laura Kinney
-Remy & Anna-Marie (and before I get people asking, I personally don’t ship them romantically. Not saying no one else should, it’s just a personal preference.)
And some bonus crack brOTPs:
-Remy & Neena Thurman
-Remy & Felicia Hardy
OTP: There’s a lot here too,,,
-Remy/Pietro Maximoff (obviously)
-Remy/Fantomex
-Remy/Johnny Storm (this is more of a crack pairing, but I blame rping on discord for this)
-Remy/Kurt Wagner
-Remy/Warren Worthington III
nOTP: Honestly Remy is so shippable with a lot of people so I don’t really care all that much. Like,,sometimes I like people exploring him in toxic relationships (like with Sabertooth or Mister Sinister) so I really don’t care skjvbdkj
random headcanon: I like to headcanon that Remy has ADHD, which mostly shows itself through him having special interests, stimming, and having a bad case of RSD (Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria) because of past trauma associated with him being abandoned by those close to him. Also I like to imagine he uses playing cards to stim and his special interest is science fiction and space operas. Let him be a nerd.
Also he’s an Omega Level mutant. There I said it.
unpopular opinion: Okay, nobody get out the pitchforks and torches, but I don’t like this common headcanon that he’s a himbo and a narcissist. Usually a himbo is described as a character who is dumb while also being kind and beefy, but Remy just doesn’t tick all those boxes in my opinion. He’s incredibly clever and learns quickly, but he also doesn’t waste his time with knowledge that won’t help him. Like maybe he can’t do basic calculus but he understands how to get a lock to break based on it’s materials. Also because he was a physics teacher and I’d buy that he understands physics very well, especially since energy is such a big part of physics. So to me, he isn’t a himbo, he’s just a decent man. And as for the narcissism thing, he just doesn’t fit into the personality of someone with NPD. In fact, most of the time he talks down about himself and thinks himself less worthy....the exact opposite of a narcissist. Sometimes he’s just full of himself because he loves himself for once and that’s perfectly okay to me. ��
song i associate with them: “Blood on my Name” by The Brother’s Bright, it has a southern gothic feel and it fits well into his backstory. Also “Poker Face” because why not. And also “Addict” by SilviaHound (yes it’s a Hazbin Hotel song but the vibes fit him so well)
favorite picture of them: I have,,,way too many I like. But these ones are just so good.
Also this one because it genuinely made me laugh
okay and now onto pietro
Pietro Maximoff:
favorite thing about them: There’s so much I love about Pietro so I’ll just list it off again ajkdbvkj
- His powers are actually really fucking cool. Like people think he can just run fast but forget that running fast is just one thing he can do. He can literally vibrate himself fast enough to go through walls, he has been shown to have some control over metal like Erik, he ran faster than the speed of sound (and possibly light), and he can leg press over 2,000 pounds. Also his superhero name is just so good, not even being ironic, the name Quicksilver is so badass.
- I love his relationship with Wanda, like sometimes it’s written really bad but other times it’s the cutest thing ever. Like he feels so protective over Wanda because of the environment they were raised in, but at the same time he learns when to let go of his own insecurities and let Wanda be her own person. Like,,their sibling dynamic is one of my favorites.
- His entire backstory is so tragic and I love it. He always feels like he isn’t good enough and tries to be as good as he can despite it all, but he’s also unabashedly pissed off about the circumstance he’s in. Like Pietro has every right to be bitter and I love seeing him call people out on their bullshit (especially in Quicksilver: No Surrender when he calls out people for marketing and appropriating Romani culture)
least favorite thing about them: ...I literally can’t think of anything akjdbvkj
favorite line: Oops it’s all gamquick
Remy: Are you being difficult on purpose?
Pietro: What other reason is there to be difficult?
And also-
Pietro: Well, that’s a step up from a blow-up doll, isn’t it?
Remy: Did anyone ask you?
(Yes these are both from ANXF)
brOTP:
-Pietro & Wanda
-Pietro & Lorna Dane
-Pietro & Clint Barton (not MCU)
OTP: Okay I really only have two but I’m gonna gush about gamquick for a minute-
-Pietro/Remy LeBeau: I don’t even know where to begin with these two, I guess to start out with they both just look so good next to one another. They also bounce off one another banter-wise very well and while neither of them take bullshit from anyone, they still don’t mind messing with one another because it’s strictly playful. Also both their backstories are similar and lends itself to them finding solace in one another, they both recognize each other’s pain and will try their best to alleviate it as best as they can. They both understand what it feels like to be abandoned and abused and would never inflict that on each other, they both came from poverty and find it hard to fit into the “normal world”, but also Pietro usually never shows his softer side to anyone, but with Remy he’d make the exception because Remy wouldn’t hurt him like that. It’s also cute to explore them being able to settle down and get away from the superhero life for a while, but also them being a battle couple is A++
There’s just so much to say about them ajbdvkj
-Pietro/Namor Mckenzie: This became one of my favorite Pietro ships mostly because of @imperiuswrecked but also because apparently they were gonna be a couple in House of M?? Like that sounds so good to read about! Like Pietro is more carefree than Namor in some instances and it would be nice to see Namor relax a little bit more around Pietro. But also because I love imagining them being That royal couple and it’s so good.
nOTP: Pietro/Crystal. Just no. That ship is a garbage fire and it should’ve burned out ages ago.
random headcanon: Pietro has darker roots because his hair used to be the same color as Wanda’s before his powers manifested themselves. Also I like to headcanon/draw Pietro with darker skin.
unpopular opinion: Sometimes Pietro is seen as being misogynistic towards Wanda and I hate that interpretation of him. He’s protective over her, but he still allows her to make decisions on her own. Also people need to stop blaming Pietro for the events of House of M. For the love of god stop that shit.
song i associate with them: “Dollhouse” by Melanie Martinez
favorite picture of them: Need I say more? Pietro carrying his Cajun bf goes without saying
This was a lot of fun to write out and there’s so much more I can say but for now I’ll leave it here ajdbvkj
Ask Meme
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Uh may i request YangYang and thigh riding n pet play?
Kitten - Yangyang (Smut)
Yangyang x fem!reader
Includes: thigh riding, pet play, oral on both male and female, typical smut things y'know. Nothing scary.
Please don't read if you're under 18! 🚫 I'm not tryna get sued.
I hope this is alright for you, anon. I tried my best & it's my first smut I've ever posted! Please enjoy.
Yangyang had invited you over for some time together. What you had expected and what you were currently doing were two totally different things.
Sitting and watching your boyfriend game with the other NCT members was not something you really wanted to do on a Friday night. Yet here you were, scrolling through Tumblr and reading smuts about the man in front of you, in hopes that it’d soothe your feeling of neglect. Of course, it only added to the want to have your lover between your legs. The dull ache was proving to be quite the annoyance.
“Yangyang, did you really invite me over just to have me watch you play Overwatch? I thought we were going to cuddle and watch Netflix or something.” His eyes continued to be glued to the screen. You could hear the muffled voices of his group members from the headphones over his ears. “Yangyang..?” You kicked the arm rest of his computer chair. He glanced at you momentarily before muting his mic and removing one of the cups over his ear.
“You alright, y/n?”
“I’d be more alright if you’d pay attention to me. I’ve been here for two hours and you’ve had your eyes focused on your monitor for the whole time. I even brought a gift for you, baby~”
“Just let me do a few more games, y/n. I need to get to Master rank. I’m so close, please.” He turned back to the game and put his headphone cup back over his ear again before clicking the back of it, unmuting the microphone. A sigh fell from your lips as you got off his bed, nearly fuming.
You were going to get the attention you craved, and you’d use your gift to him to do it, too.
Shuffling through the backpack you had placed next to his bed hours before, you pulled out the gift you had mentioned to Yangyang moments before.
-
After changing and admiring yourself in the dorm’s bathroom mirror, you snuck back into Yangyang’s room carefully to not have any of the other sets of eyeballs lay on you that may be around the dorm.
When you find yourself back in your boyfriend’s room, you make your way to his bed. The springs squeak as you get on all four. You make your way to the middle of the bed and sit on your heels, pressing your breasts together as you call Yangyang’s name. His eyes go from his monitor, to you. His eyes explore your body. From the white fluffy cat ears sat upon your head, down to the lace collar tied around your neck with a golden bell, and finally down to the pastel purple lace lingerie. He gulps and turns his attention back to the monitor, covering his mic before he speaks,
“You know if you just give me half an hour I’ll be finished here, right? Just half an hour...”
“You know that I can’t wait that long, Master. I need you now. Right now.” You mewled.
A moment of silence passes in the room, the only sound being the clicking of Yangyang’s mechanical keyboard as he manoeuvres his character to complete the objective.
“Alright, Kitten. If you’re this needy, then come ride my thigh as I finish this round. After this, I’ll be all yours. I promise” he says as he pushes himself away from his desk, holding his arms open. You nod and find your way to his lap, positioning yourself upon his thigh. You begin your gentle motions, rocking your hips. Soft sighs of contempt fall past your lips, the feeling of some type of stimulation lighting up your senses.
“Yangyang hyung, what’s that jingling noise?” Jisung’s voice echoes out of his headset and he halts. You smirk to him as you continue your movements against his thigh.
“It’s just.. The cats! Yeah, we got the cats new collars the other day and they have a bell on them! Louis is all over me right now. He’s so fucking needy for attention..”
The chat goes silent before Lucas speaks up.
“We never got the cats new collars. What are you even talking about, Yang?”
“Yes we did, you moron. We got them off Amazon. You just haven’t seen them yet” Ten’s voice booms through the headphones.
Ah, so someone did catch on.
As soon as the winning banner flashes across the screen, Yangyang exits the game and the Discord call. He takes off his headphones, setting them on his desk before grabbing your ass and guiding your hips at a better pace.
“Look at you, Kitten... You’re so desperate for Master aren’t you? You couldn’t even wait a bit for him to finish his game properly.” He growled, landing a firm smack to your ass. You let out a soft moan.
“I couldn’t wait.. I was reading naughty stories about Master and it got me excited for him..” You rested your head against his shoulder, face flush from embarrassment. “I was fantasizing about him and I feeling good together...”
“Hm, tell me what you read, Kitten. Tell me what you thought about” You sat upright, looking into his chocolate brown eyes. He reached up and played with the golden bell that hung off your collar, scanning your facial features. “Well, go on. Tell Master.”
“I read something about having sex with you while the members were home... they could hear how good you made me feel.” He hummed and gently grabbed your chin with his thumb and forefinger, guiding his lips to yours in a sweet kiss. He forced his tongue into your mouth, licking along your tongue. He tasted like mint. His spit was sweet, his tongue warm. Coupled with the movements of your hips against his thigh, you felt the dull burning feeling blossom in your lower stomach. Your mind grew to only focus on that feeling getting stronger and stronger. The kiss grew hungrier, sounds of wet kisses echoing throughout the room. Eventually, your orgasm snapped and you moaned into Yangyang’s lips as you came undone, clenching around nothing. He helped ride you through your orgasm, rocking your hips against his thigh gently.
He pulled back and lifted you by your thighs, plopping you down onto his bed. The springs groaned as he placed himself between your legs, supporting himself by placing his hands on either side of your head. Locking his lips yours again, he softly ground his hips down against your core. A moan erupted from your lips, but it was muffled as his tongue found its way around your mouth. Slipping his right hand down to your thigh, he gives it a squeeze before looping his index finger around the waistband of your panties. You lift your ass off the bed as he pulls them down your legs, leaving your core exposed to him.
“We’re leaving that on.. It looks beautiful.” He points to the bra that accentuated your breasts before leaning down and kissing along the ridge of one of the cups. He carefully moves the padded material aside and takes your nipple into his mouth, sweeping his velvety tongue over the erect nub, sending shivers down your spine. He nibbled your nipple softly before pulling back with a lewd ‘pop’. The way his eyes seemed to explore your hot and bothered form reduced you to jelly.
Yangyang lifted his hoodie over his head, exposing his lean but nicely built body. A small grin made its way to his mouth as he rubbed the outline of his dick through his skinny jeans.
“Don’t you think you should pay Master back for distracting him from his game? You made him disrespect his members, Kitten..” He unbuckled his belt and pushed his jeans, along with his boxers, down his legs. He took his length into his hands, pumping it a few times.
“Take Master’s dick down your throat, Kitten.” You positioned yourself, your head dangling off the edge of the bed as he aligned the tip of his dick with your mouth. “Tap my thigh three times if it’s too much. I’ll stop immediately, alright?” You nodded, mumbling a soft ‘yes’.
He pushed his dick into your mouth, slowly. You gagged as he pushed himself in to the hilt, before pulling back and repeating the movement. He started to pick up speed, your attempts at moans only urging him to fuck your mouth faster. Thick spit from the back of your throat coated his length and made its way to your lips, some dripping down your cheeks. Your hand snaked down your body and made its way to your clit, rubbing gentle circles into it. Every thrust that he did into your mouth and every gag you produced just aroused you further, the lewd sounds filled the room.
Yangyang’s thrusts became faster, more inconsistent. You knew he was getting close, and you were preparing yourself to take everything that his dick offered you until he pulled out of your mouth. Chest heaving, you looked up at him with hooded eyes.
“I don’t want to finish yet. Get on the bed properly and spread your legs for me, Kitten” You did as you were told as he positioned himself between your legs, face centimetres away from your heat. He moved his hips, grinding into the bed as he spread you open for him. He licked a stripe up your heat before returning his tongue to your entrance and tracing a circle around it, he let out of a soft groan. It wasn’t new to you that your taste sent Yangyang’s taste buds to heaven. He busied himself with his face buried into your pussy, switching between quick licks at your clit with his fingers stimulating your g-spot and tongue fucking you as his fingers swiped over your clit. Loud and desperate moans left your mouth as you knotted your fingers into his hair. He knew your body like the back of his hand, and it was painfully obvious. Looking down at the erotic sight of him pleasuring you, you felt that familiar dull feeling building in your lower stomach and tightened your grip on his midnight locks.
“Master, I’m gonna cum.. Please make me cum.” You whispered, his eyes flicked to meet yours as his tongue slipped out of your heat.
“Cum for me, pretty Kitty” he purred before slipping his long digits into you again, massaging your sensitive walls. His mouth pressed itself around your clit, tongue licking painfully pleasurable circles around your bundle of nerves. Throwing your head back, you let out a nearly painfully loud moan, your contractions squeezing his fingers in a pattern that Yangyang adored feeling. He helped you through your orgasm, manoeuvring his fingers in and out of your heat.
“What a good girl... Cumming hard on Master’s fingers. You’re absolutely precious.” He removed the fingers that were coated in your juices and brought them up to his lips, licking the fluids off of them. Colour found its way to your cheeks. As much as you’ve seen this sight, it still renders you a blushing mess. “Now, it’s time to breed my Kitten, isn’t it? She wants me to cum in her tight pussy, doesn’t she?” You nodded, too embarrassed to say anything.
He lined himself up with your soaking entrance, pressing a kiss onto your lips as he pushed himself into you. A pathetic moan fell from your lips, only to be eaten up by his mouth A few moments passed as he slid his tongue into your mouth, tasting yours in a kiss that made both your bodies yearn for more. He began to rock his hips against yours, biting onto your lip. You both groan into each other’s mouths as the pleasure sparks through your bodies. The pace of Yangyang’s movements start out slow. His speed picks up as you let out soft meows in place of moans. His hips begin to snap against yours at a rough, erratic pace. Yangyang pulls back from your lips and grabs your legs, placing them over his shoulders to reach places inside you that has your vision hazy. His name flies out of your mouth repeatedly, in a near scream.
His eyes seem to devour your form in front of him. The way your bra pushes your breasts together, the way your face twists in pleasure with every thrust, how your plush lips move whenever you moan his name, all the way down to how nice your beautiful pussy takes his dick. You were truly beautiful. As his thrusts continued, he felt his orgasm building up.
He moulded his lips against yours before mumbling against them, “Master’s going to cum, Kitten. He’s going to fill you up so nicely..”
“P-Please, cum inside me, Master. I need it...” You whisper, reaching for Yangyang’s hand. He threaded his fingers with yours, giving your palm a soft squeeze. His thrusts become messy and uneven as he moans your name, hips thrusting shallowly against yours as he empties himself into you. You close your eyes, enjoying the feeling of his muscles tensing and releasing. Gentle ���I love you’s are exchanged as he pulls himself out of you. You gasp as you feel his seed run out of you and onto his bedsheets. It’s pleasurably warm and sends goosebumps all over your body. He reaches for his discarded t-shirt and cleans you up, before handing you an oversized sweater and a pair of basketball shorts from his wardrobe. You unclip your bra and remove the cat ears, placing them in your bag before slipping into the clothing that Yangyang had handed you. He slips on his jeans again, buckling his belt. “You thirsty?” He ask as he grabs a shirt from his wardrobe, pulling it on.
“Yeah, just a little..” You reach for his hand as he guides you out of his room and into the shared kitchen of the dorm. Eyes from the living room and some sitting around the dining table all look at you two, before someone speaks up.
“I didn’t know we had three cats” Ten chuckles, taking a sip of his Americano. Both Yangyang and your faces light a deep shade of red. “You may want to take that off, by the way, y/n..” he motions to something around his neck, It finally clicks to you and your hands fly up around your neck to feel the lace collar still decorating it. You quickly untie it before shoving it into the kangaroo pouch of your hoodie.
“We have three cats? Since when?” Asks Lucas, oblivious to what the sentence really meant.
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Just Out Of Reach
Posting on tumblr due to Discord's character limit, this one's a lot longer than my other ones. A prompt from @marlinspirkhall about how food on the holodeck doesn't exist once you step off it got me thinking. TW for violence, injury, blood, food, eating disorders I think (?? rather safe than sorry) and long-term distress. Thank you for the Federation gothic prompt!
It's fuzzy, you remember the ship leaving spacedock after repairs, and some of the anticipatory silence as the odd lack of Dominion ships greeted your rush toward the Bajoran sector to help recapture Deep Space Nine and the Bajoran wormhole. You had never been this far away from home, but you'd tried to steel yourself. The red alert had blared in your ears, and you don't remember much else. You look down. You're bleeding. You curse, and look around for medical supplies.
You're in a dark building, with debris strewn around. A force field makes it's presence known as a hurtling piece of Dominion ship tailwing is stopped in it's tracks from perhaps it's original destiny of destroying wherever you were. If there was a forcefield up, there must be an energy source. You find you had crash-landed here, as there's an escape pod near the fallen bulkheads. You saddle up with the materials from the escape pod, and hunt around for any available resources on whatever man-made, oxygenated building you'd been lucky enough to land in. You put your bag down, and take off your Starfleet outer shirt. You're still wearing the gray undershirt, and over it you tie the main shirt over the wound. You wish it had been an easier area to tie, like your lower leg, and press on. After a trek over fallen metal, everything from large carts, a whole shuttle, bulkheads and PADDs, you find the opposite wall, marked with a plaque designating it the Miyamoto, a mini-space station hardly the size of a neighborhood street. Some place, you scoff. It feels like a shadowy castle fallen into disrepair, with the flickering lights looking like the occasional sunbeam brightening it. Atmospheric, at least, if it wasn't going to comfortable. It feels as if you could almost hear sad music, accentuating just quite how dark the station was, cold and alone. The Miyamoto station echoes sadly, the destruction and carnage of Dominion and Federation ships making their final stand above the station feeling long off, although you could place it as happening mere hours ago. Continuing onward, you clear a path the best you can of the debris on the ground, in case you round this area again.
You see places that look like shops- the *Miyamoto*, as per it's informational plaque, was a station commissioned and controlled by Starfleet, but it had housed many Federation-aligned planets, that is to say, planets that hadn't joined the Federation for one reason or another, but remained in contact with it, politically or economically. Your journey around the station ends as you look back down at your outer shirt, wrapped around your torso wound, and it's too red with blood for comfort. You take an unfortunate, seething inhale, processing what this might mean. You have no other than the most basic medical supplies on your bag, and you're alone on a mini-space station with debris that was ripe to fall over and crush you at any time. Nobody else seems to have crashed near you. You're alone, on an at least semi-functioning, mini-space station. And you were determined to survive. The bleeding cut on your torso should be dealt with first. Can't look for food or set up a distress call if you're bleeding to death. You take a tricorder from the bag, and scan around for anything useful. It picks up gauze a few meters ahead of you. Better than your shirt, certainly. You navigate toward it with the tricorder's map, and it navigates you to a holodeck, you recognize from the doors. Gauze in the holodeck? You thought the violin music had been a symptom of a bleeding body and the brain processing your day, but no, the violin was louder. Getting closer to the holodeck, that made more sense. It was extremely lucky the program was still running. You walk inside. The inside is a gothic, turn-of-the-century sort of laboratory. Indeed, a holodeck character playing a violin spots you, and huffs.
"You're bleeding. Are you looking for my partner, Dr. Watson?"
You take a moment- oh, this was a Sherlock Holmes program. You doubt Dr. Watson could help you, but then you take a moment to think. Emergency Medical Holograms are just as holographic as Dr. Watson here, and they have helped millions of people. You're too tired to act, so you ask him, "Yes, I need a doctor. Can you get him?" Too much also eating at your mind to enjoy the program, Dr. Watson fixes you up in the flat. You wince at the old medical technology, and wish the two of them lived in a period of time with more current medicinal knowledge. - Wait. "Computer?" you say. "Change the time period to, uh, 22nd century. No, I mean, to today. 24th century. Keep Sherlock and Watson with me." The computer responds to your request, and you see the program change around you. You laugh at the mystery-solving duo's updated outfits for the 24th century, then look back at Dr. Watson. It's a little jarring how seamlessly they continue from the jump in time, but better that than their program stop working. Watson asks a replicator- a holographic replicator, which makes you laugh a little bit, for a dermal regenerator, and you get patched up. "Stick around for a cup of tea?" Watson asks. "Sherlock really wants to know why you broke into our flat." You consider it. You've heard jokes from non-Federation species when trying out holodecks for the first time, "Calories don't count on the holodeck!" Anything you eat here wouldn't sustain you, the minute you left the holodeck. You could activate this program so long as there was energy to the station, but food was a priority. Assuming the *Miyamoto* had been in a tussle just a few hours ago during your fly-over to Deep Space Nine, now was a crucial time to find genuine replicators before they went offline. You leave the holodeck. You see the gauze over your injury (kept for good measure) disappear as you exit the holodeck, but not the skin you'd grown back from the dermal regenerator. The gauze was holographic, but the stimulated skin cells and tissues were not. You follow the path set by rounding around the small, circular station, and tracing your steps back through the cleared path you made. Your injury healed, you could now look around and find something to eat. You follow around a downloaded map of the *Miyamoto* from the plaque's infochip, and hunt down all the replicators marked on the station. One by one, they're all broken, in pieces, or missing. Maybe the station was in poor shape to begin with. You take another trip around- at least you're getting plenty of exercise in, you halfheartedly cheer- and visit all the food shops. You raid the fridges, cabinets and cupboards, and still find nothing. Intending to not be disheartened, you sit down for a moment. Your hunger is suddenly made aware to you, your vision swirling. Not good, you decide. Your stomach hurts, and you try to remember the last time you ate. Breakfast on- on the *USS Halay*. Maybe tea with Dr. Watson wouldn't be so bad, you assure yourself. You have some food with the two of them, think of a new plan, then go back out there and find some food. Some water, while you're at it, too. You walk back, and almost trip over debris you swore you moved out of your path. You enter back to the holodeck, and smell the fresh air. You find Watson and Sherlock again, and you're offered a pastry you can't remember the name of. You eat, and have some tea, and you feel at peace. You're still directly aware of the stakes, you're stuck on a space station in the middle of nowhere, but you're at least still alive. And going from desperately hungry out there to the sweet scent of buttered pastries in here in a still-peaceful London before the Dominion invaded was a sense of home you'd missed. You sat down, and considered your optics. If you left now, you'd probably be just as hungry as before, but here, you could come up with a plan, and make the time before it worth it. You clued in the holographic Sherlock and Watson into it, without exposing to them they were holograms. Quite tricky, it was, but you were glad they got over
their suspicions and were just willing to help. You and the two problem-solvers looked over the schematics of the *Miyamoto*, and found from your walkaround of the station, the replicator at the Bolarian food shop was the least broken- it had gotten halfway to forming bread before it puttered out. Although not quite a chief engineer, this seemed to be your only option. You picked back up your supplies from the escape pod that you'd kept with you, and journey off to the replicator. You feel the distinct hunger pangs as soon as you leave, and almost regret leaving. Little matter. You'd already gone and done it, you might as well make it worthwhile. You get to the replicator, and try to recall your engineering training. Basic engineering design over necessary machines like replicators and transporters were required classes at the Academy, and you couldn't remember a thing from it. You open a hatch at the back and fiddle with some of the wires and steel EPS hubcaps, and put everything back into place. Not ever quite sure what to do, you feel a fog in your brain, you know you're putting a square peg in a round hole as you try to fix this. You screw things on and off, scan it, flip a switch. Closing the hatch, you hit it for good measure, and try replicating food again. It produces a gray slop of what could only technically be edible, organic material. You take your tricorder out and get a holo-scan of it. A moment of darkness in your vision, you fall to the ground. You're really feeling it. You hold a hand to your stomach, and close your eyes tight. It hurts, it does. You could make the feeling go away, if you just went back.
A deep breath, and you turned around. Just back for a second.
Desperate to get back to the holodeck, you're assured you can figure out the replicator's problem with the holo-imager scans. You get back inside, and feel the pleasant, clean air, and walk back inside. Ravenously, you scarf down the food given to you, and you can feel your mind finding clarity again. If you could find a way to fix the replicator while inside the holodeck, you'd be set. You could fix it there, and only be hungry from the minute you walked over to the replicator, no brain fog as you tried to fix it. Maybe engineers had "Don't fix things on an empty stomach" as a rule. If not, they should. You spend a few more hours there, going over the specs of the replicator, sitting in the nice flat. It's an amalgamation of every depiction of 221B ever put to screen, and all the books are real, wholly scripted ones. You chuckle, certainly sure only a man of fiction could read so many books, bookshelves stacked wall to wall. Many of them had frantically scribbled notes and writings in them. After some time, you fall asleep. You're woken up by Watson, telling you again that you need to wake up. You rub your eyes, and consider everything from the day previous. Hungry, stuck on a space station with no food, and surviving in the holodeck. This would be a lovely nightmare to wake up from, eh? Lovely, for the fact you're waking up, you joke. "-get out there and find something to eat or your body will starve. Please. The program-" You burst out from under the blanket on the couch. Dr. Watson looks at you. "Sherlock and I put together that you're on a holodeck. Incredible inventions, truthfully, but what is more important now is your life. You haven't eaten in how long? A human would starve after not eating for-"
"About a week. But without water is a different story. Three days, at most." Sherlock filled in. You swallowed. Wonderful. You look back at Watson. "Please, we're trying to help you. You need to head back out there." That's the last thing you want to do.
Neither of them were being helpful. "Look, we can't leave the holodeck. All we can do is-" "I don't care!" you yell. "I'll just-stay in here until I figure it out." The two exchanged looks with each other. Watson got closer to you. You feel small. Threatened. "You're Starfleet, right? You haven't even given us your name. How about you-" You lash out. "Computer, delete characters Sherlock and Watson." "Not possible." "Fine! Delete whatever you need to get rid of them." "Confirmed." the computer says. The two of them phase out of existence. You breathe heavily. You hope they won't be mad at you. "Computer, change scenery. Somewhere on Earth. As far away from Sherlock as possible." "Changing location to Dunedin, New Zealand." the computer replied. You stop, and catch your breath. You'd just- stay in here. For a while. Yeah.
The systems of the Miyamoto station degrade. The holodeck, over time, begins to lose critical imaging projectors. One corner of the holodeck shows the depressingly bare and black wall, the whole program not covering the entire room. You try not to mind. You sleep. If you could just- just learn how to fix the replicator....no. You have everything you need right in here. Everything....you need. You take an arduous breath. The holodeck doors have sealed shut. The imagers have stopped working. You're trapped inside. A lone Starfleet officer starves to death on a holodeck, over an agonizing three days, just as Sherlock predicted. The Miyamoto station is destroyed by the Breen a year later, unimportant and completely alone. If one listened closely, passing an unimportant, tiny little station, they may have heard faint music of a violin.
#star trek#my writing#federation gothic#uss lilac#blood#dominion war#ds9#wasn't planning to add sherlock holmes to the mix but when I had the injury and the violin i couldn't resist
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Grand announcement ❗❗❗
Yep you read that right and no this is not a joke, unfortunately.
Honestly is it that much of a surprise?
Um I don't know when I'm actually going to post this or if I will post this considering I've been debating on whether i should actually take time off of not. But depending on the date I post this, its either going to be one of two reasons or both.
LETS GO WITH THE POSITIVE ONE FIRST SHALL WE?
First of all, Happy Ramadan! My maids going back to her old village for the holidays so I'm going to have to assist my parents in babysitting more til she gets back. Therefore I will be too busy to post or update. Or maybe my parents plan an unexpected vacation or something and I'll be too busy to communicate with anyone on my phone.
Edit: I take it back my mom fired her when she caught some cigarette ashes in her room today (my maid went back to her village yesterday btw) and now we gonna get a temporary one that comes and goes everyday at the end of Ramadan LMFAOOO more chores for me then
Also, im posting this to just inform everyone I'll be okay and I'll return somewhere in the end of May or the beginning of June considering I promised a few moots to voice call then. Man, it feels weird speaking all serious like this. It feels even weirder that I'm not even using capslock lmfao.
Okay the other reason. Im not really thrilled to think that it's finally drove me up so far i have to take a break from everything.
If you can't tell from how I've been on and off lately uh like my mental health is getting bad. Like really really bad?
I won't go into much details but for safety stuff here's your trigger warning for ED, SH, Depression, Nightmares, etc. If you don't want to read this part you can scroll down until you see some random red statement I'll write later so you can see what I have to say before i leave.
Uh okay where do I start. To sum it all up basically, my mental health is in absolute ruins? At the moment?? Uh... It's been the worst it has been in the past three to four years? I don't know anymore. I can't sleep properly because I keep having nightmares of past su1c1d3 attempts and the outcome of actually succeeding. I can't eat properly anymore. My SH habits and my anxiety is coming back (every beginning of every month though so it wasn't as bad as way way when this started) and I trying my best to stop it again. I'm almost a month clean but I doubt that I can last more than that again because everything seems to get worse and worse. I cry myself to sleep because of my thoughts being so fucked up. I tried coming forward with this so many times to my parents and my teachers but they won't believe me, i can't do anything anymore except try to get better by myself. I can't bring myself to communicate with anyone anymore knowing full well that the only thing that's keeping me alive at this moment is socializing. I keep having flashbacks of when older men stalked me everywhere I went in the past. I lie awake knowing that nothing can bring me comfort except seeing that one idol who you all probably know by now. Im literally depending on him to keep me together during the day it's not even funny anymore lmfao.
I have to do endless chores, deal with all of this at once, catch up on two semesters worth of materials for my new school, deal with my graduation ceremony which is coming around this month or next month? Somehow I developed some type of anger issues the past year so haha that's great yuh no.
To stop you from worrying, no, I don't have suicidal tendencies anymore but I don't exactly have something to be thrilled living for. I'm just vibin in life at this point lmao
I'm just tired. I'm really really tired. Id lie awake crying my eyes out while listening to renjun voice audios. I'm tired of crying all the time and I'm tired of everything. Im tired of laying in bed overthinking and stressing bout things that wouldnt normally bother as much. I promise I won't do anything stupid
I won't be gone long. I'm not okay at the moment but I will be. Because at the end i need to be okay again. I'm giving myself time to heal again before something gets bad. I promise I'll come back from time to time. I promise I'll be okay again and I'll come back as that happy hyper renjun simp who swears and uses capslock, spamming memes or whatever.
I'm not comfortable opening up about anything that goes beyond too sad in my life so I'm just going to leave it at that
You can stop scrolling now. The triggering part is over.
Thank you for all the moots who decided to cheer me up unknowingly whenever I was having a mental breakdown. Thank you for reading up to here lmfao uh I don't know what to say? God Im a mess.
Dms on both tumblr and discord will be pretty slow. I'm sorry but I'll reply to my asks like a day or two after they're sent. I won't be posting much until June and I'm truly sorry for those who were waiting for the last chapter of idni, im taking this chance to also rethink the ending so I can somehow make it better than I originally planned it literally a year ago.
Damn broken English 101.
As I said before, I'll be okay when I get back. I'll be the happy hyper angie I always was and always will be when I return. I don't know when I'll post this but hopefully I don't haha. You don't have to be worried about me, this happened before and I always come back okay again. I'll be okay, I promise. I'll be back in a month.
Do what yall do and don't forget to tag me whenever you post any renjun fics haha. I'll miss you all, don't forget about me okay? Haha.
I'll be looking forward to writing again and hopefully I'll be mentally and physically healthy then. Hopefully I'll have my motivation in writing back again by then. I'll try my best to commit into getting better and being happy. Plus I wanna start an sm au but rn it doesn't seem very likely haha
I'll be contacting my networks bout this as soon as I post this.
Thank you and see you all later
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LEX’S 2020 APPRECIATION POST PT. II !
— to the lovely moots & followers who i talk to quite often (or pretty much everyday), this one’s for you.
thank u for being in my life, you made my 2020 so so much better. i’m so grateful october lex decided to make a tumblr acc 🥲
i’ll try my best to keep it kinda short 🥲👍
in alphabetical order:
@4fterh0urs — my omega phoebe 😩‼️ ily so much bc you’re both extremely stupid n extremely smart at the same time. u mean so much to me and i love talking to u even if u call me such weird as nicknames every damn day 😃 you’re so sexy n hella intimidating smfh idk how i was able to make u my bitch (JK PLS DONT KILL MEE) anyways, thanks for being a real one bae + you’re the person i block the most, so you’re special ig 😹👍 ily you’re actually such a sap but u pretend to be all tough heh <33
@archivednikes — my solar system, my wh*re (lovingly) hi bae 😣 ok yk how much i love u but. im gonna tell u again: ILYSM!! OKAY??? please know that you’re such an amazing human being and you’re SO incredibly talented. god i love u so much please take care of yourself baby, you’re always so kind to other people and i hope you can do the same to yourself. once again, i am so fucking glad you decided to slide into my inbox that day, because now i look forward to talking to you every single morning. insert grabby hands ilysm <33
@boosyboo9206 — onyx hi babes! i’m so so grateful for you omg u dont even know it. you always manage to cheer me up with your antics and you’re always here to support me 🥺 whenever i’m down you somehow aways manage to make me feel a lil better. i love talking to u whether it’s about sth as mundane as the weather or even your obsession with the word peepers. thank you for being you, please take care of yourself and stop sleeping so damn late. ilysm <33
@ch4jime — chloe bae!! 😁 hi omg ilysm you’re so cute and cool and nice urghh thanks for always checking up on me! i love love seeing you in my asks, you’re such a lovely person to be around. i seriously need to be better at dropping in other people’s inbox, so just know that i’ll work on hanging out on your blog more often this year bc ily! i wish u all the best and please never stop being you baby mwah <33
@fairyoomi — hi bae 😣😣 how are u?? i know we don’t talk much anymore, and that’s okie, but i still wanna write u this lil note because i’m so thankful i met you here on tumblr. you’re an amazing writer and u were so sweet to me even when i was a teeny blog who didn’t know anyone. i admire u a lot, yknow? thanks for being such a friendly and welcoming person, ily <33
@gu3to — mochi bestieo 🙀 idk if you’ll even see this smh so i’m just gonna text u after this (if i don’t forget to rip) okay so. hello?! you’re so mf cool and you’re a trendsetter 🤩 yes yes im fueling your god complex it’s bc ily smh. you’re so dumb i wanna choke u sometimes but i won’t bc i’m also just as dumb 😁 pls stop disappearing from the face of the Earth okay ilysm you always keep it real and i know i can always count on u to listen to uh... my shit. okay so when are we gonna make out? 🤨 oki bye <33
@hoekageyama — wifey!! maddie baby urghh yk how much i love you, you’re one of my earliest moots im pretty sure? and aaaaa i’m so so glad i decided to be weird as hell and slide into your asks that day (pancreas. sighs. iconic.) you’re my numero uno whenever i wanna bark about hot 2d boys and what i’d let em do to me coughs err yea hehe. please take care of yourself baby you’re such a sweet and kind and loving person and i’m so glad to have you in my life. smh we text each other lovey dovey texts anyway but i still wanna do this for u 😋 ilysm!!! <33
@honeyskawa — lani baby hi! i know you haven’t been super active lately, but i just wanna tell u that i appreciate u so so much!! you honestly made my goddamn week when u sent me that ask about how i inspired you bc what the heck?? never in my life have i expected to have such an impact on someone. you’re a wonderful writer honestly. i love u so much and i hope everything’s going well baby, i’m excited talk to u more whenever you decide to be active on tumblr again <33
@jougogo — kaybae hi!!! you haven’t been on tumblr much lately but hi sexc it’s me lex lol i’ve moved accs hehe 😎 i hope u see this whenever u get your phone back cries. you’re such an amazing person to be around, always so cheerful and friendly, you exude so much positive vibes and ilysm. you always manage to lift up the mood with your sexc self and i admire u for that. you’re so incredibly chaotic and fun to be around ahrgehxhh i appreciate u sm and i hope you’re taking care of yourself bby ily <33
@kemochie — my waluigi, my favorite f*rry, hi 😝 urghhh god we just started talking everyday pretty recently but god. you’re so funny??? and i love bullying u bc u give me so much material to bully u with (ok jkjk i love u that’s why i bully u smh) also, you’re so incredibly supportive and u were actually the one who pushed me to finally post that atsumu fic, even tho stupid me accidentally deleted it LMAOBSBD anw, u bring sm joy in my life, so thank u for that. we’re a small lil filf and you’re the milf to my dilf LMAO ilysm mwah!! <33
@kenmaki — gabbae! virgo bestie!! hi hi !! you’re such a talented person and you’re an amazing writer, and i hope one day u can get past your insecurities and see yourself as the wonderful person u truly are. i love how we were able to relate to each from how similar virgos think + our initial conversation of dick measurements and such will forever be seared into my memory. and congrats on getting a daily railing on the dash HSBDH i don’t look at em i promise lol 🤩🤩 jdbdhdh ilysm bby <33
@miyams — ren sweet babie hi! you’re so incredibly talented please don’t listen to stupid hate anons. i’ll stab them with a serrated knife if i have to 😠🔪 you’re so flippin cute and sweet i love talking to you, and i love love love whenever u come by my inbox to say hi. i hope we can talk even more in 2021, my dms and asks are always open for u bby (even though i suck at replying right away, sorry abt that huhu) i love u sm baby please take care of yourself <33
@miyasangel — ardie bae 😜 hi sexc!! i still cant believe we talk like everyday now lmaoo i used to think you’re so freaking cool (i still do) and now i’m friends w u whattaheck 🥲 you’re such an amazing writer wtf. i hate that we had to start our friendship on such a sour note (ehem discord ehem) but i’m really glad it brought us closer together. ily cockarden i’ll be sure to bully u even more HAHAGS IM JK makes out w u so hard bc you’re so damn hot ily 😣‼️ <33
@owlywrites — owly baby hello! ily so so much and you’re so talented, you deserve so much recognition. i hope i can read more of your fics soon bc they’re so well written ugh 😣 thanks for always checking up on me and always being so incredibly sweet. i love u so so muchhh huhu i wanna give u the biggest hug in the world :( please take care of yourself and never stop being your genuine self kith kith <33
@rilacry — milfy gorlillola 😜😜‼️ hi sexc. omfg i was so intimidated by u wtf (and i still kinda am smh) bc you’re so cool?? and your writing n carrd making skills are amazing as hell wtf. u just exude BDE bc you’re hella hot AND bc u wanna peg everyone. anyways,, i’m glad we got closer recently, even if it was out of really wack circumstances. ily bae pls stop sticking your memojis everywhere mwah <33
@rintaroll — my kue tete ☹️☹️ ilysm smh bye i can’t believe we’re close now wtf you’ve always been so cool and sexc 😩‼️ oh god i rmb when u were still on your old acc and u seemed so out of reach and i was a lil intimidated ANDBDJD SHHH but yea now ik you’re just a big h word dork and i love u for that 😣 i wish u all the best for your singing career bby you’re such a talented writer AND singer wtf. also you’re so pretty???? wtf how rude 😠 JKJK HAHHSBD ilysm kithes u so hard <33
@tetsoleil — geegee!! hi baby 😣 thanks for being such a sweet human being ily! it’s been a while since we actually talked yeah? but i still want u to know that i love u a lot and i appreciate u so much. i’m so so grateful you’re in my life because you’re such a joy to be around. you’re an amazing writer bby and i hope you get the recognition u deserve. i’m always here for u if u need anything. ilysm bby <33
@velvetfireworks — rachie bae 🤩 my bakso goreng, my golden kiwi!!! ily!! hehe im so glad i decided to slide in your dms when u asked me if i was indo. but ahhhh you’re ao sweet and cute and supportive ilysm. an amaaazing writer and i admire your work so much, but i think you’ve heard me say that multiple times before. i’m so glad we became closer recently through our love for greasy food and wonky lil faces 👁💋👁 kith kith ilysm <33
@yato-o — yato baby hi!! urgh honestly i appreciate u so so much?? i feel so lucky to be able to get to know you. i don’t even remember how we met but ahhh thank u for always stopping by and have a chat with me even though i know you’re a busy person. please take care of yourself and get some rest whenever u need to! don’t feel pressured to come on here if you’re tired baby, im so grateful to have u in my life, i luv youu <33
HAPPY NEW YEAR YOU SEXY BAES!
kisses, lex
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Happy new year everyone 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉
I know 2020 has been hard for everyone.
And I want everyone to know, suffering isn't a contest and we all suffer in different ways. But I feel I should give my year in Review. Just some things that happened to me personally.
This was an intense, and long and spiritual and emotional journey for me...
I really discovered what it meant to have community, family and what my life means to me.
But I feel I need to get this in writing cause I can remember the year with vivid detail and I will probably forget if I don't get it down.
Do I have to share this publically online to my tumblr account for a bunch of strangers to see? not really.
Do I want to?
Yes. I think so. Just from how so many people on tumblr and real life have touched me.
This is kinda long and no one needs to read this.
(idk how to do a readmore on mobile. But this is where I would add it later. No one needs to read if they don't want to.)
January/February: (and some background on the last five years of my life cause.....well. it's important.)
As people knew, I got way into Invader Zim last summer. I spent most of my waking life working a dead end job at a grocery store. I lived a sad lonely life, going straight home to a single dark studio apartment. With not many material possessions outside of games, my laptop and my tablet to my name. Half of my material loves, such as home furnishings and books were still in boxes from when I moved in. In case I ever had to move again, or get some "big screenshot or copywriter" job in the city.
....
I lived in that city in the same dead end job and apartment for five years.
No friends. No social life. I often refused to make doctor appointments or attempt to establish myself in that city. I didn't even talk to anyone in my workplace.
Work. Go online. Go to sleep.
I lived like that for five years.
I thought it was good.
Even my therapist thought I was doing well.
When I really wasn't. My main character flaw I struggle with is motivation.
I can talk to someone about very detailed plans I have to fix a problem... But I tend to never follow through.
Just because I can describe in detail how to fix my personal problems, it doesn't mean I will do it.
(I have gotten better at this but it's a major struggle)
I might have been a Zombie during the day...
But by night I was pouring my soul into my AU and my analysis.
After being so thoughly ignored or overlooked by the Naruto fandom and the Undertale fandom, I felt like I had finally found my home and was settling into a community there.
I just loved that people loved what I had to say.
Especially my AU.
It's no secret that a lot of themes in my au revolve around found family, grief, and loss.......
Fatherhood, in particular.
What it means to be a father, how much do you need to try when you mess up, how willing should a child forgive their parent, especially those that have wronged you and how much of it is factually accurate and simply a self projection of what children want their parents to be and visa versa... What amount of forgiveness and change is nessasary...is it needed?
....
It's no secret that a lot of my AU is a giant coping mechanism for my Dad's death. Espessially the falling out and growing closer with a lot of my family members throughout the years following his death. (Most of the time I keep it ambiguous to how it relates to my personal life unless I include a readmore that states so outright. I feel my au can be enjoyed by a variety of people in the fandom who don't need to know me as a person or my life story.)
My Dad passed away in 2016 in February and my family still feels the aftershocks to this day.
It's part of the reason I moved to the city, alienated myself from my family and people that loved me and refused to experience life for five years.
My entire world was Zim, and I was okay.
March: When America finally realized and started to feel the effects of the pandemic....
A lot of people got scared.
Me included.
I didn't have any streaming services or access to the news. So I only heard accounts from my mom.
I didn't understand why the store was so dead quiet and empty for a few days, then it went into mass chaos and panic in the span of two days.
It felt like Retail black friday in the worst way. Everyone was packed like sardines. Everyone was yelling. The lines at the registers bled into the clothing department.
I was witness to customers shoving others for toilet paper, being rude to cashier's and just overall unpleasantness.
At the time, I didn't even fully grasp what the pandemic was, and I feel a lot of people at the time didn't either.
I ended up absentmindedly scratching my eyebrow in front of a customer and she screamed and villanised me for it. That they didn't want groceries touched by my "unclean hands"
I ended up breaking down into tears.
The customer behind me gave me a hug and told me I was doing a great job.
But the damage was done. It was the final straw, I couldn't stop crying and I was breaking apart.
Thankfully my Boss (the one who likes me) pulled me aside and asked what's wrong.
It was then that I quit. No notice. Same day. I had to get out of there.
I was planning to move to an apartment with my sister in the summer, but my Mom offered for me to move back in with her temperarily just so I can get out of the city and away from the pandemic.
So I did.
I got scared, broke my lease a month early and quit my job of five years that gave me nothing back.
He told me, "take care of yourself and your family, I won't keep you here, do what you need to do."
So I did.
April-June:
A very eventful few months.
My mom offered for me to live at her place, but for some reason she was acting like I would live there forever. That this wasn't a temporary arrangement, and that I didn't have an apartment set up already.
This was in large part to my sister, who had lived with my mom taking advantage of her for years.
Even though my sister and I were going to move in together, I was just never sure about it cause of how she never packed her stuff or made any effort to find a job.
My mom often acted like I was lazy and not searching and was treating me like... Well, an unruly teenager instead of a woman of 29 years. She acted like I was a failure for returning home when it was her idea in the first place.
I would have just been petrified in the city.
Like usual, I retreated to my au again.... And in the spring, something eventful happened.
In may, 8th 2020:
I was invited by @rissynicole to join an invader zim discord.
Now, I've never really used discord before. I always thought it's interface is too confusing.. and I'm a member of a few other iz discords and I usually don't follow them that closely.
Rissy assured me it was different cause some friends of thiers made it and it was smaller.
Before I knew it, I was sharing memes and getting to know everyone there.
It wasn't long after I invited my partner in IZ crimes, @paketdimensioncomic who was genuinely wary of iz servers due to a bad experience with the last one they were a part of.
But soon they were sharing memes and laughing with everyone else.
My eyes were starting to open and I was able to connect to fans of my work in an interpersonal way. And I was able to discover new artists and aus I never knew about.
I was also able to meet so many others of the community and invite them to the server myself.
The moo-ping 10 server kept me sane while I was living with my judgmental mother.
Not only that, the summer was very productive for my au.
Drawing was all I did, and it was a huge break from the job as a cashier I had.
Not only that, June came, and with it, me and Ceph's first collab fic:
A result of us just going back and forth in our DMs constantly about Professor Membrane and how he changed in ETF for the better and how much we adamantly stan "trying-to-be-a-good-dad-brane" and how much of his ETF development has to be implied off screen in order for the emotional resolution in the movie to matter.
The only reason I never professed my love for Membrane as a character in the fandom before the fic dropped was.... Well....
Membrane can be a decisive character in the fandom and I was so worried people would hate me if I did an analysis on him, simply because he's not the best parent in the world. (As an understatement)
Ceph and I really encouraged each other to scream our love for the science himbo loud and proud more frequently and so often.... I actually start to see less Membrane hate posts and breakdowns then their used to be.... I like to think it's a combination of Me and Ceph's influence, along with ETF and the Quarterly's painting Membrane in a slightly more nuanced light then he was previously.
I never wrote a collab fic before and it's such a rewarding and fun and unique experience that I don't think I'll ever have again. And I love working with Ceph on our fics so much.
So much so we did it again...
July-August:
I never thought I would be one of those people who writes NSFW IZ fic... But here I am.
The Brainbrane au started.... An au of my au where Membrane and the Computer fall in love and Membrane makes him a body.
This ship was based around the idea where we joked that Membrane and Zim's Computer would have funny interactions if they ever met, under the pretense Membrane thinks Computer is Zim's parent.
Our headcanons morphed and shifted until we just full blown started shipping them.
Just because Membrane and Zim's Computer have overall REALLY entertaining chemistry.
It's a character dynamic never seen in the show or comics (yet) and I imagine thier interactions to be nothing but entertaining banter.
The fic was also born from spite... Making fun of the troupes and cliches that we found personally destestible in some questionable zadr fics.
So an angry ace and a demi-bisexual collab on a porn and end up blessing the fandom with
Compapa headcanons,
Computer being recognized as a more common used fanon character,
The ship of Brainbrane.
The fandom having a crisis of "oh God, not only are we xenophiles we're technophiles too!!!" Or "why you gotta give Zim's Computer an ass"
More android Computer designs
It was an eventful summer.
In the midst of all this, I moved into my new place, got a new job, and I was able to see my friend (who is def my platonic straight soul mate) who lives in Indiana.
She came to visit, showed me how to decorate and how to take care of my body better! Things were looking up! It was great.
September-November:
My job was at a boat store. If was approaching the fall and my hours were being severely cut.
I was getting into a rut of depression again.
I thought things were changing but the same routine I was trying to escape from was the same thing coming back.
But instead of letting it take hold, I decided I was going to do something about it... I was gonna visit a museum and go with my sister. Just... variety stimulation.
Well that didn't happen.
I talked about this shortly in my au itself...but..
My sister had a complete mental breakdown.
She stopped taking her meds, went off the deep end and was in the hospital a total of five times throughout November.
A lot of it was acting out and the perfect storm of environmental factors that made her scream and act out so she would keep going back to the hospital.
It was traumatizing for me.
I just can't explain what it's like. For her and for me to be in that position.
I'm not telling the full story and a lot of bullshit things happened I won't share here.
She got diagnosed with bipolar one and my mom expected me to be a caretaker for her.
I threatened to disown my family and move away out of state.
It was just too much for me to handle.
So much I was a nervous wreck.
I tried to pick up a second job... Cause my sister was in the mental ward so frequently and couldn't pay the bills.
But I was fired within a week cause I was so stressed I couldn't retain the basic information they were training me for.
It was an office job.
My dream.
It could have been.
I was fired from something I really wanted.
I was only there for three days.
I could not retain any information.
I was a mess.
My sister was a trigger, my mom wanted me to live with her. I couldn't live like this.... I had to get out.
I had to get out.
December:
Remember my Indiana friend?
Well the first week of December is my birthday.
My 30th to be exact.
While I did pick up a seasonal position at Target (not my first pick)
I took the first week of December off so I could spend time with her. Cause she agreed, I needed a break from this crap.
Surviving 30 years is cause to celebrate and if I had to celebrate with my sister I would have cried.
I know there was a risk traveling out of state during a pandemic...
But I needed out, I needed a friend..
And I kinda wanted to look at the place since I was considering moving there.
My friend's mom was sick so she avoided me and her daughter and got us a hotel room.
It was fun! I got to swim in a salt water pool, we talked about Naruto, I showed her the iz and su art books I brought, also Computer and Membrane tea.
I also got to meet her other friends and get crunk. And her bf who is super nice and funny!
I had a super fun birthday....
Until her mom told my friend that her grandparents had covid and that was what she had. And my friend got sick within that same day.... As did I.
I owe so much to her family.
I was an entire state away...about a ten hour drive from home.... She let me stay at her house. "The covid house" we called it.
Cause everyone (except the father. He avoided everyone and booked a hotel immediately cus he was an ER doctor) had covid within a day.
I called in, the test results were positive and I had to stay with her family for ten days quarantine before I could work again.
Which would have been fine....
If my tumblr didn't log me out perminately of my old account. @dana-chan325 .... Which really sucked cause I had a constant headache and was too sick to engage with tumblr or much of the fandom. I didn't want to make a new account when my head was in a bad fog and I could barely breathe or smell.
It's not like I saw much of my friend either.... We all slept at different hours and she had more symptoms then I did.
It was just netflix, danganronpa v3 and cry.
I was miserable, but at the same time.... Not?
I really feel like God himself was the one who pulled me off from tumblr, and my living situation.
Maybe a whole extra week feeling like a bobblehead was what I needed.
It gave me some much needed clarity on my relationships with my mom and sis and friend.
Running away to Indiana was not the solution here.
Once I was better within ten days and no longer had a leave of absence, I drove home.
I am glad I fully recovered (but from how I understand it, my dear friend is still ill. I'm praying for her)
I might have gone to work a bit too soon, cause I had an asthma attack after trying to unload a single cart in the span of six hours.
My boss lectured that my speed was unacceptable, and even though I explained the covid situation and breathing problems many times, she threatened that I'd be fired if I'm that slow again.
Que the next few days of work where they put me on register.
Instantly I was sent into a panic remembering the last time I was on the register and how that panic attack caused me to quit.
I even asked if I could go back to stocking, since my breathing had improved. My boss assured me that I was put on the register cause they needed help and nothing to do with my covid thing.
Then as December concluded and the new year began, my boss said that this was the last shift for me cause my position was seasonal and they were letting a lot of people go.
I then asked why I was on the schedule for Sunday, and he told me to ignore it and I'm free to reapply for full-time.
I mean.... They can act smart about it...
But putting your general merchandise stocker onto register after she had an asthma attack and missed working the first two weeks of December due to covid.....
Not a good look.
So once again, I'm jobless once more.
Will probably continue to live with my sister for awhile.
But I do not feel as if it's a bad thing....
I met so many good people this year....
My friend's family even gave me 500 usd to cover my rent since I couldn't work for a majority of December.
I've seen evil and good from humanity this year. I've seen acts of god, good friends and what my real family means to me as well as friends I consider family.
This year really made me look back at the person in the mirror and say,
"I deserve better."
And actually worked for it this time.
Oh and after Christmas I got a horrible yeast infection that burns over most of my body currently.
Very accurate doodle to the pain I'm in right now.
(seriously my body is a fungus.)
But hey, good news, I respected myself enough to go to the doctor about it!!
So that's progress.
I really hope 2021 holds good things for me.
Thank you to the mooping 10 server for always being there and keeping me sane,
Thank you tumblr for liking my au and everything.
AND A SUPER SPECIAL THANK YOU TO @evartandadam and her family for housing me and my dumb diseased ass. Everyone, she is an angel and I can't express how much she means to me. Please check out her art and buy her stuff on redbubble.
Anyways... Byebye 2020.
I look forward to what I can accomplish for myself this year.
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all these people think love’s for show
This was written for the 2020 Incognito Elf exchange on the Harry and Ginny Discord for the amazing @katie-with-the-tea. Katie, I hope you have a fantastic holiday! ❤️💚 Special thanks to @thedistantdusk for organizing the event, which is no small feat!
Title taken from "peace" by Taylor Swift, because I am forever basic and proud of it.
ao3
Harry’s not unaccustomed to seeing his face splashed over the front page of the Daily Prophet. It’s a weekly, if not near-daily occurrence, and it has been since the end of the war. They are obsessed with him. They snap photos when he’s out for a pint with Ron or visiting Madam Malkin’s for a new set of robes (because as it turns out, it’s possible to go on the run for nine months at the age of seventeen, live off mushrooms, and still go through a grow spurt). They print speculative editorials every time he has to go to the Ministry - which is frequent, since he works there, though they prefer to disregard that. They run interviews with people he only tangentially knows - the Eyelops employee who once sold him Owl Treats, perhaps, or the Hufflepuff who was Head Boy when Harry was in his first year - who share embellished tales of their interactions with The Chosen One.
At this point, it’s almost weird when they aren’t talking about him.
Mostly, though, he’s managed to shield Ginny from taking the full brunt of it. She’s a hero in her own right, and he knows that a sighting of the two of them together is guaranteed to sell more papers than the Prophet can print in a day. He spent the summer hiding out with her at the Burrow or at Grimmauld Place, which proved effective, and so far, they haven’t missed out on too much. Of course it would be nice to take her out for dinner or even just walk through London holding her hand, but the reality of his life means that isn’t exactly an option. After everything, he’s just happy to be with her at all.
But today, it’s different. Today, when the post owl flies in through the fireplace and drops a fat bundle of newsprint directly onto Harry’s mug of tea, it’s not just his bespectacled face blinking back at him. In fact, the sight before him makes his stomach sink into his shoes.
“Nice,” mutters Ron from across the kitchen table as he uses his wand to siphon up the mess. “All they do is deliver papers all day, you’d think they’d have better aim.” He pauses and narrows his eyes at Harry. “You all right?”
Harry wants to respond, really he does - he knows Ron is prone to assuming the worst when he goes all quiet like this - but maybe Ron should assume the worst, because that’s how it feels. Words are failing him.
The photo, which moves in a terrible, taunting loop upon the page, is from yesterday, when he had been foolish enough to think that he could sneak up to Hogsmeade to see Ginny without being spotted. He followed all of his own unwritten rules, too. They didn’t go to the Three Broomsticks or to Honeydukes, but instead stole away to a secluded grassy knoll just behind the Shrieking Shack, where he believed that its macabre reputation would shield them from prying eyes.
And it had, but he made the mistake of kissing her hello in the middle of High Street (having not seen her in weeks, he hadn’t really been able to help it), and now, taking up the entire front page of the Sunday Prophet, is a long-lens closeup photo of their lips locking together. Over and over and over again.
Harry tosses the paper down onto the table and leans back in his chair. At this very moment, that same paper is surely arriving in the Great Hall, landing on the long wooden tables and making a spectacle of the most precious relationship in his life.
“Fuck’s sake,” laughs Ron, blinking in surprise at the photo. “Not exactly subtle, are they?”
“I should have used the cloak,” Harry mutters, mostly to himself, as Ron picks up the empty mug and carries it over to the stove. “And I should have met up with her somewhere different, I don’t know why I thought I could Apparate to the middle of town on a Saturday afternoon and not get caught - or I should have just stayed home. I should have known better.”
“They’d have got you some other way,” reasons Ron as he refills the mug with boiling-hot tea. “It’s unavoidable at this point, really, innit?”
The fact Ron’s right doesn’t make the truth sting any less. Where Harry goes, photographers follow, and if it was only his life it affected, he could live with it. But Ginny deserves better. Most of the horror Ginny has been through has been his fault, and now that it’s over, she deserves calm and happiness and peace.
If only he could offer that to her.
“How come this never happens to you and Hermione?” Harry asks irritably as Ron plunks the mug down in front of him. “Oh, cheers.”
Ron shrugs and picks up a slice of toast. “It does, occasionally,” he replies around a bite, “if it’s a slow news day. But the difference is that they’re not usually looking for us. They’re always looking for you.”
“And now they’ll be looking for Ginny too.”
Ron nods, morose. “Yeah.”
“Fuck.”
Like he always does, Harry writes to Ginny that afternoon, but today the parchment is filled with apologies, promises to do better, ideas on how they can meet up without being seen. He doesn’t try to reassure her, because there’s nothing to reassure her about: this is his life. There is no sense sugarcoating it; she needs to know what she’s got herself into by being with him.
By the time he’s finished his letter, the sky has gone dark, and he ambles down to the basement kitchen with the intention of sending his letter off with Pigwidgeon. But just as he reaches the staircase, he pauses. He might just be imagining things - it wouldn’t be the first time - but he’s almost positive he’s heard his name just now, coming from the general direction of the fireplace.
“Harry?”
There it is again, louder, more insistent, and alarmingly familiar. His stomach just about leaps into his throat as he thunders down the stairs and darts across the kitchen to the fireplace.
“Ginny!” Indeed, her bright, beautiful face is hovering there above the grate, and the sight of her squeezes his heart with fear. “What’s going on? Are you okay?”
“Well, hello to you too,” she quips, good-naturedly shaking her head.
“How are you doing this?”
“I’m in McGonagall’s office,” she says as though this is something she does every day. “I just wanted to talk to you.”
His stomach turns over. She’s here to chuck him, he’s sure of it. She’s seen the paper and she’s decided that the hassle isn’t worth whatever benefit there is to dating him (if one even exists).
“Oh,” replies Harry, resigned as he drops down to the floor in front of the fireplace. “All right.”
Ginny tilts her head curiously to the side. “You look like someone’s just died,” she observes. “Is everything okay?”
“Well - I - erm - you go first,” he stammers out. “What’d you want to talk about?”
She squints at him, perplexed, then says, “Apparition lessons are starting tomorrow. The thing is, there’s so many people signed up this year - y’know, since we didn’t have them last year at all, it’s sixth and seventh years - that there isn’t room in the Great Hall so we’re doing them in Hogsmeade instead.”
Harry nods, unsure how to respond. If she’s chucking him, this is an odd way to begin the conversation. And if she’s not, then he’s not entirely why it’s so urgent to inform him about her Apparition lessons.
“So since the lessons are in the morning, McGonagall said we could stay in the village for lunch if we wanted to, so you can visit again.” The excitement on her face is painful to behold. “I just didn’t think a letter would make it to you in time, and I really want you there.”
Relief rushes through him - she is definitely not breaking up with him - but it is quickly replaced by guilt, because she looks so happy and so hopeful, and he loves her so much, and he doesn’t want to have to say what he’s about to say.
First, though, he leans forward and kisses her softly on her soot-tinged lips. “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
Ginny blinks. “Oh.”
“Just, with what was in the paper today-”
“Oh, that,” interjects Ginny. “Yeah, I thought it was ridiculous too-”
Guilt grips tighter at Harry’s chest. “I know, I’m so sorry. I had no idea they were even there, but I should have known to expect it by now-”
“But I still want to really see you tomorrow,” she says, looking earnestly up at him.
“I do too, but…” He lets out a long, slow breath. “It just isn’t a good idea.”
Ginny looks up at him again, an intensity in her eyes this time, and then nods decisively. “Right. I’m coming in there, can you pull me through?”
“Gin - you can’t just leave school-”
“What’re they going to do, expel me? Come on, pull me through.”
Her hand rises up from the grate. Harry grasps it and tugs until she materializes fully in front of him. As she steps out of the fireplace, she brushes off her robes and then drops down onto the cold tile floor beside him. Her right hand slips over his left and pulls it onto her lap, and their fingers entwine together automatically.
“I’ll be honest,” says Ginny, the tip of her thumb rubbing along the back of his. “I didn’t love the picture in the paper.”
“I’m so sorry-”
“Stop apologizing.” Her quiet voice carries immense patience; affection for her bubbles up inside of him. “I didn’t love the picture, and the article was…” She casts her eyes up to the ceiling in search of the right words. “Creative at best. But I also wasn’t surprised by any of it. I’m mostly amazed it hasn’t already happened.”
“That’s because we never used to go anywhere together,” Harry points out, and she nods her agreement. “But Ginny, it’s only going to get worse. There’s always going to be pictures and articles that make things up, it’s just part of my life. I just, I never wanted it to be part of yours.”
“Don’t take this the wrong way,” says Ginny, “but that’s completely stupid.”
Harry lets out a sputter of startled laughter. “Oh, is it?”
“Of course it’s going to be part of my life,” she tells him, eyes fixed on his, “because I chose to make you a part of my life. I didn’t have to get back together with you, you know.”
Despite himself, Harry laughs again. Somehow Ginny manages to make everything better, easier, lighter. He expected an awful, painful conversation, and instead they’re holding hands and laughing.
“I’ve always known what I was getting myself into,” she goes on. “People talked when we were together last year, too.”
“A little gossip from Romilda Vane is completely different from the Prophet printing things every day - which they’ll do, by the way, now they’ve got pictures of us together.”
Ginny shrugs. “So let them. I mean, if they’re going to do it regardless, then we shouldn’t stop living our lives.”
This is difficult to argue with, but there is still one nagging fear at the back of Harry’s mind, because now he has further proof that Ginny really is in this for the long haul with him. The wizarding world has been watching him since he was eleven, and he doesn’t expect that all of this public attention isn’t going away anytime soon.
“So, what about…” He looks down at their interlocked fingers, studying the way they fit together as though designed that way. “I mean, what if we - erm - got married, and - and had kids?”
Harry forces himself to meet her eyes and finds that same intensity burning there, the thing that kept him going on long, cold, hopeless nights in the tent, the very last thing he saw as he faced his own death.
That, and maybe just the slightest hint of a smile.
“If we have kids?” she repeats softly.
“Yeah, well - you can’t pick who your parents are, can you?”
“Maybe everyone’ll be bored of you by then,” Ginny offers up, inching closer to him and resting her head on his shoulder. “And if not, we’ll deal with it.”
“All right.” Harry angles his face towards hers so that their lips brush. “Just know that I wouldn’t blame you if you decided you’d like a quiet life.”
Ginny’s nose crinkles. “Sounds boring,” she says. “I’d rather have you.”
Their lips meet again, lingering together in soft, gentle kisses, and when Ginny pulls back to catch her breath, Harry realizes he has one last question.
“What’d the article say, anyway? I never even read it.”
Ginny sits up straight. “You haven’t read it?!”
“I was too angry!”
“It was rather brilliant, actually,” she says with relish. “It spoke a lot about what a scarlet woman I am, having had three whole boyfriends in my life-“
“Naturally-“
“But apparently now I’m even worse, because now…” She paused for dramatic effect. “I’m the one you’re cheating on Hermione with.”
Harry laughs and rolls his eyes. “As if Hermione and Ron weren’t just down the road from us?”
“Yeah, well.” Ginny planted a cheerful kiss on his cheek. “Let them say what they want.”
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My Complicated Feelings on Waking Witcblr
I've been posting less on Tumblr as I try to figure out what direction I want to take my work. It became pretty clear to me at the end of last year that I wasn't putting out as much work that I was proud of and didn't really know where to go next. It seems like a lot of folks were going through a similar reevaluation as I saw less and less of blogs I really loved.
I've been seeing more Waking Wichblr content rolling across my dash and I've been having some really conflicted feelings on it. On the one hand, I understand the impulse and I love that folks are organizing around it. On the other, I think it fails to grapple with some deep issues the community has and a fallow period could be really fruitful. Let me explain.
Witchblr Hinges on Consumption, Not Conversation
As it currently stands, much of Witchblr hinges on consumption. People reblog things like they're collecting things. I feel like a lot of my pieces wind up being put on a shelf and not much happens with them. There's often not a lot of interaction when I post.
The conversations around pieces tend to happen on other platforms like Discord and y'all I cannot stand most Witchblr discords so I'm not privy to those conversations. I've noticed a marked drop in comments on my work over the last year. One of the reasons I started posting my work on Tumblr was to get feedback and as that's dropped off, I've turned my attention to longer form works. And the strange things is, I kind of get the same level of interaction. It's incentivized me to put more of my energy into creating workbooks, zines, and a support group.
I'm not mad about that at all. I feel very neutral about it. But it is a factor. If the conversation is going to take place away from where authors can benefit from hearing about it, the platform becomes less engaging and less valuable to those producing content.
Witchblr Often Wants to Consume With Paying
After watching several communities connected to Tumblr collapse because leadership got worn thin or didn't have enough money to keep it going on their own, I'm pretty jaded about how much a lot of folks actually want to keep the communities going.
Folks who genuinely don't have money - I'm not talking to you. You're great, you're doing what you can, you can skip this. But I am talking to folks who will drop $50-$100 on "witchcraft supplies" per month but balk at spending $5 to keep a server going on Mastadon or support a writer they love on Patreon.
It says a lot about what those folks value. Content, education, resources - those are expected to be free. Which means those of us who are trying to do it have to take time away from creating content to productize our work in hopes of making any money from it at all.
If there's one thing I wish Witchblr would take from Christianity, it's the concept of the tithe. Of setting aside a percentage of income each month to support the community. It doesn't have to be 10%, it can be 1% for all I care, but just that sense that its our duty as members of a spiritual community to monetarily support those who are following their calling of teaching.
Witchblr Needs to Stop Consuming and Start Documenting to Survive
I'm seeing calls to revive Witchblr by encouraging folks to make more posts which I think is an extremely bad idea. I've said this in other places but the big issue Witchblr has is that so many folks are new. And new people are trying to teach new people how to do things neither of them has much experience with. It's made Witchblr an echo chamber of people spouting the same lines with very little sourcing or evaluation. A lot of what gets passed around winds up being not very high quality.
So are new folks just supposed to lurk? Not at all. New folks can serve two super important roles that benefit everyone, experienced and new, can benefit from - documentation and curation.
For folks who are truly just starting out, documentation is hands down the most important and valuable thing you can offer the community. Do not instruct folks to do what you've done. Instead document what you tried, what sources you used, and whether it was successful or not successful and why. There's so much value in being an artful observer at any stage of development.
For folks who are a little more experienced but still new - hands down one of the best things you can do is the painstaking work of curation. People who make master posts of resources that helped them are gods I tell you. Shout people out. Boost the work that's helping you. It's invaluable.
Tumblr's Policies Have Driven Folks Away and They Will Again
I think it's important to remember that the one of the first mass exoduses of Witchblr blogs happened with the anti-sex media policies Tumblr instituted in 2018. Many people migrated onto their own platforms after the announcement was made in solidarity with people who would be put out of business or needlessly flagged because of the policies. Many of those independent blogs unfortunately petered out and I can't find many of those writers anywhere anymore. I'm still mourning that loss and miss them greatly.
For those who have the time and the spoons to do so, what I would love to see is a network that connects independent blogs with Tumblr blogs (if this is already happening, let me know). A roundup style blog that curates posts both on tumblr and off would be amazing. Without something that, we're likely to fall prey to more exits as Tumblr makes changes. There's always the chance that Tumblr could go away entirely! Having hubs that can connect folks with blogs that isn't entirely based on one platform would go a long way to keeping folks engaged in the long term.
If Witchblr Can't Figure These Things Out, A Fallow Period Could Be Great Actually
For folks who've not been through a community fallow period, this may seem like dire straights. I remember when I was seeing some of my favorite communities dwindle in 2010, I felt scared I was going to lose people I cared about and resources I depended on. But what wound up happening is that many of those communities survived. The people who were the most devoted kept coming back and contributing. Or they'd come back when they could and leave when they couldn't.
People need time to process and practice all the information that's been given to them. If Witchblr does wind up winding down (again, because I've been on the platform since 2008, it's done this at least 3 or more times now) it will likely come with the added benefit of more people synthesizing the material they're reading, practicing it, and having genuinely valuable notes of their own to add. I think it could go a long way toward enriching the community.
I think of it a little like compost. Sometimes the community has to break down a little before it can be fertile ground again. It needs an off season. Even in parts of the world where the weather could technically support year round agriculture, there's a deep understanding that the ground needs to rest. So if Witchblr does slow down, don't fret. Keep practicing, keep processing. And then, when you're ready, tell us about it.
Conclusion
These are just some thoughts I've had knocking around and wanted to get out in words. They're a bit messy but I wanted to see if they resonated with anyone else. Communities are cyclical. Low periods are needed and helpful. They tend to kick back in pretty organically if the foundation is laid properly (and even when it's not). I hope folks are well out there!
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The whole zvkka stans calling zutarians and people with non-gay sexuality headcanons for either character homophobic reminds me rather disturbingly strongly of when the portal fandom tore itself apart over accusing chelley of being lesbian erasure... I'd genuinely rather not see that kind of shit happening again. It resulted in a multitude of discord fanservers to get deleted due to continued bullying and pointless drama as well as tons of fans quitting the fandom here on tumblr too. It's what nearly made me quit tumblr for good 5 years ago, I was part of the group of people who were harassed.
Guys it is seriously not that hard to stick to basic human decency and in extension, basic internet fandom etiquette.
Tag your posts properly and don't stir drama.
I originally had nothing against zvkka as a ship other than the fact that I simply disagree and only see them platonically, but I could absolutely respect if people like it because their preferences are none of my business and usually don't harm anyone - plus I saw the potential as a not too serious and lighthearted comfort ship for sure.
But now I'm immensely uncomfortable with it for the sole reason of some of the stans being rude, crass and outright threatening towards anyone that isn't a supporter of the ship.
I've seen people get called homophobic, racist and get bashed for simply disagreeing with a ship preference, using arguments that support biased and contradictory interpretations at best.
This has to stop.
Fanon is not gay or mlm rep and headcanons are just that. Headcanons. Unless something is openly confirmed it will remain as such, but knowing how canon went (comics and LOK) we know that such was not really the case.
Using your headcanon being disagreed with unironically as an argument to put someone else down is clownage of the highest caliber and all you're accomplishing with it is making an ass of yourself.
Everyone should be allowed to make up whatever headcanons they like, they're merely ideas to build upon the material that's already there or to replace what parts you don't like about it and overall enhance your personal fandom experience.
However, it is just that. Ideas and concepts, not rule.
Shipping mlm ships and bashing those who don't is not activism.
People disagreeing with your headcanons is not phobia.
Telling people they're terrible people or homophobic for headcanoning a character - who in canon has only been seen dating the opposite gender - as anything other than gay is performative activism at best and harassment at worst.
I'm by the way perfectly aware that it's likely only a small portion of the fandom that behaves this way, but the fact that it is still happening regardless and that the rest of their fandom seems to just let them have their way uncontrolled is starting to get on my nerves and makes me dread posting anything Sokka related on my artblog out of fear that I'll find hateful anons in my askbox once one of the bad zvkka stans comes across it and figures out I post zutara content too.
It shouldn't need to be said that in the end this is just fiction we're talking about. It really should not be nearly important enough to get so damn aggressive about it and harm others.
Get your priorities sorted and rethink your approach please.
Nobody needs people like that, they form a graceless stain on the reputation of talented fandoms and suck any joy out of them.
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Meet the Creator!
Introducing: Squido!
Commission: I haven't and don't really intend to. I don't want to take anyone's hard-earned money. Just ask me to draw things and there's a good chance I will.
Social Media: Tumblr: @sky-squido AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sky_squido/pseuds/sky_squido
Tell us a little bit about yourself!
Call me Squido! I love to draw and write but I'm also super extraverted and I love interacting with humans so always feel free to chat with me! Aside from drawing and writing, I just love being outside and have a tumblr sideblog dedicated exclusively to nature photos I take. I love mountains, the ocean, the sky, and just about everything else in this beautiful world of ours! If you ever feel like having an internet stranger give you a thousand word rant, ask me why my favorite color is blue and you will not be disappointed!
What got you into creating? what inspires you to keep creating?
I've been drawing for as long as I can remember and can't seem to stop, though I take long breaks sometimes I always seem to come back to it again. I try not to have anything in mind when I draw, but to start sketching and let the drawing happen. Sometimes I find that what I'm trying to draw is not what my drawing wants to be (if that makes any sense) and change what I'm making halfway through. It makes drawing a really relaxing and carefree therapeutic experience! Writing is different. I've always enjoyed writing, but I didn't write much and never shared my writing with anyone because I thought it was super pretentious. It wasn't until entering High School and joining the literature club and making a deal with a friend that we'd share our writing with each other that I actually gained any sort of confidence in my ability and sought to improve it. Being in that club and sharing my pieces at the open mics was a really encouraging experience! I invite everyone to share their writing, even if it's with some random internet stranger (I'm open anytime!) if they're unsure of their abilities. A little encouragement goes a long way! Now that I'm on Discord, ao3, and tumblr, I receive so much more feedback than I ever have before! It's been super encouraging! What inspires me most is definitely nature. Even if my ideas aren't directly related to the outdoors, I get my best ideas there. Fandoms are also a great idea generator. The sheer volume of headcanons and prompts is enough to make me dizzy with ideas!
What's your creative process like?
I love sketching. My favorite thing about drawing digitally is that I can sketch as much as I like and never worry about wasting materials! Often times my sketches turn themselves into drawings without permission and other times they stubbornly remain sketches for all eternity. I always dive right in because I have no patience and the idea I started out with generally isn't that great but in the process of pursuing it, it spirals out of control and sometimes the idea gets better and sometimes it gets worse but I just kinda roll with it. Creating is a really chill process for me and while I regularly scream stuff like "I'M DRAWING ON THE WRONG LAYER NONONONONONO" or "NO HECK FRICK SHOOT IT SMUDGED HECK HECK GET THE ERASER QUICK," the creative process is a great way for me to unwind. I'm the same way about writing. I never plan or outline and just kind of roll with things. I mean I generally have the basic jist in mind, but I try to not have a plan so I can keep the story driven by the characters and not force them into acting the way I wanted them to in the outline I made hours or even days ago. Creating is my opportunity to break free so I don't really see what good a plan or outline does me. I'm a pretty spontaneous person!
What kind of mediums do you like to use?
I like to take pictures, but it's not really my main focus. I've been mostly digitally drawing—I use my iPad Pro and Procreate—but lately I've been pencil sketching with just your average everyday mechanical pencil (I'd forgotten how nice the texture of paper was! Clearly I spent too much time drawing on my iPad!). I have these Stabilio chalk pastels I love to pieces, but have also spent a great deal of time with watercolors. Digital is my primary medium currently, though.
Is there a specific scene wrote that you are particularly proud of?
"Sky’s golden scales are glowing with reflected light from the sun while beneath them, the same pulsing blue in her mane runs like a river as her very skin is alive with electricity. The sun’s beginning to dip, fading through the color wheel from yellow to deep orange to scarlet and the world is bathed in watercolor and hue shifted through the rainbow until all that was blue becomes red. This new alien world begins to darken as red fades to deep purple-pink, the clouds catching last vestiges of gold in their pillowy folds, yet Sky continues rippling with lighting, the bright blue flowing like blood through her veins and the gold shimmering in the eerie azure glow. We weave through the winds and zephyrs and I close my eyes and let the breeze caress my hair and when I reopen them, I’m standing back on the ground again in a world long since darkened by night. I place my hand over my beating heart where Sky is still laughing with joy and smile because once you’ve awakened your dragon, you don’t need wings to fly anymore."
Is there someone who inspires you and your writing or art?
Every fanartist and fanfic writer that posts their stuff online is an inspiration to me. Even if their stuff isn't very good—especially if it isn't very good—it's a huge testament to the courage of the creator and their bravery in expressing themself! I sat on fanfic and fanart for years and never shared it and here were kids half my age putting out art that was their first experiment in a new medium and a little shaky but it was still out there and they were still being supported by the community and that really inspired me to reach out and stop lurking in fandom and actually get involved!
is there something that you struggled with that made you grow as a creator?
I feel like everyone has these periods where they were just gaining confidence in their artistic ability but suddenly everything they make is trash and they're not happy with any of it and they feel so down and worthless and "where did all of my hard-earned ability go? Will I ever get it back?" I think this is a pretty common experience and when I find myself there, I find it most helpful to share what I make anyway, even if I hate it, with someone who I know will give it to me straight because they'll point out the deeper problems—the root of the issue—that I hadn't even noticed and I can use that information to grow as an artist. Bad pieces are just as valuable as good ones. There was also a time where I had a lot of trouble developing a style. I did a lot of experimenting and never found anything I liked. What happened is I just kept drawing and whatever popped out eventually evolved into my style. I used to get frustrated that I couldn't draw anything without a reference, but after years and years of using references and drawing some of the same things over and over again, you won't need the references anymore. I mean, they're great and you should always feel free to use them, but over time, you won't need to look up a picture of every little thing you try to doodle.
What got you into writing or art?
My silly twitchy fingers can't ever seem to stop drawing! Same with writing. Words and ideas follow me around, little plot bunnies pestering me until they get written down somewhere. I was greatly inspired by the works of C.S. Lewis in my writing, especially his Cosmic Trilogy. My art style was aided by Hiromu Arakawa's Fullmetal Alchemist, which was a valuable stepping stone in developing my own style. Other than that, it was my own insatiable desire to MAKE THINGS that spurred me onwards. I don't think I could stop if I tried!
What's your favorite part of the creative process?
After you've got that first paragraph and you've found a flow and you've got a topic and you just GO. I get into the zone and the story starts happening on its own and I'm not an author anymore, I'm just a channel between the world of the piece and the page. That's my favorite. I love watching things take shape. I love shading a sketch for these same reasons. The whole drawing comes together and becomes A Thing and it's the most exciting time to be a creator. Something else inside you has taken over and you're just along for the ride. I have no idea if my experiences are common at all but this is what it's like for me!
What's your least favorite part of the creative process?
EDITING. I HAVE ZERO PATIENCE. THE THING IS DONE. WHY DO I HAVE TO KEEP LOOKING AT IT. CAN I POST IT YET. This leaves me with a lot of holes in what I make and I can't do a very clean, super detailed drawing unless it's for an art class and I'm forced to keep working on it. I have a terrible habit of never proofreading my things!
What's your favorite type of scene to write?
AAH hard question! I love writing description and places where I can really let my inner 19th century romantic be unleashed but I also love a good emotional moment between two characters. Something tense. I like fight scenes, but I try to keep them brief and interesting. Sometimes I find scenes where I have no idea what's going on and I try to avoid that, but it's really hard sometimes.
What's the hardest for you to create?
I have so much trouble with endings. I can generally figure something out, but there's always a moment of panic before the end like "heck I wrote everything I wanted how do I wrap this up????" That's probably a byproduct of me planning nothing XD I sometimes have trouble with characterization and making sure everyone acts the way they actually would. The hardest part is continuing after you have an "oh heck what do I do now" moment that breaks you out of your zone and all of your ideas and plot threads turn invisible or evaporate or go wherever it is they go when you're looking for them.
What's your favorite genre to write?
ANGST ANGST ANGST ANGST. Wellll... scratch that. I love something adventure-y and plot driven with a lot of really meaningful character interactions. I've always had trouble putting my writing into genres, but I guess that kind of speaks for itself in a way.
What fandoms do you enjoy creating for?
Linked Universe is the fandom I have created and posted the most for by a LONG SHOT. I found LU shortly after making my tumblr and I joined the Discord shortly thereafter. Since then, it has been nonstop inspiration and creativity for me! I tend to get sucked into one fandom and it consumes me for a few months before I silently drift out of it and never think about it again. LU is the fandom I've been the most active in EVER though—and it's still going—so there's a good chance I'm never getting off this ride.
What's the work you are most proud of?
AAAAAAAAAAH MY BABIES. okay um here's the first and only fanfic I've ever posted anywhere but I'm really happy with: https://sky-squido.tumblr.com/post/618964544219463680/turn-back-time-a-linked-universe-fanfic I have a lot of other pieces kicking about, but they're not fandom so I haven't shared them yet. I probably will after I touch them up a bit.
Do you have any fics inspired by real life stories?
Not really? I don't really know where my ideas come from to be honest!
Where do you post your finished works?
my tumblr. I tag stuff #squido writes and #squido draws so you can find them easily. I also put them on the discord but they get lost in the stream of other works pretty quickly so stick to my tumblr. I also have an ao3 now! https://archiveofourown.org/users/sky_squido
If you have any fun stories about the pieces you made, please do share!
Turn Back Time was actually live written in the Discord, but entirely unplanned and in the #angst channel! It was just a headcanon but then I started describing it and like 2 hours and 5k words later I'm sitting in the Discord like "what just happened??"
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My Current Thoughts on Writing Fanfics
I’m so glad I’ve had this bloggity since 2012, because I can see how much my approach to writing has changed! I wanted to touch base on where I am now, plus answer the most common questions I receive about writing fanfics beneath the cut.
Obligatory disclaimer: I’m a hobbyist writer, this is meant to be taken as opinion/reflection, not advice, different approaches work for different people, annnnd also check out my digimon fanfics (FFN and AO3).
How do I develop a regular writing habit?
I’d start by setting aside 15 minutes a day to write. Don’t focus on word count- writing x number of words can be intimidating, but most people can sit for 15 minutes and get something down. If you’re writing on a computer, turn off the internet and place your phone out of reach
Gradually increase the session length.
Never worry about the quality of your writing while you’re drafting. That’s what editing and subsequent drafts are for. I have a post on utilizing successive drafts to combat writing paralysis here, but the tl;dr is that the pressure to write a perfect story in the first draft often turns writing into an agonizing trial instead of creative play.
Your first draft is bad, period, at least compared to what it will be. In the kindest way possible, get over it. Your value as a writer- or as a human!- isn’t tied into your questionable first draft. Please explore your story in the earliest stages with enthusiasm, not criticism! You’re going to make it so much better by the time you’re finished!
How do you write so much?
See, here’s one of the biggest changes in my mindset compared to my early days as ahiddenpath. I used to think that doing all of this writing was like... extra credit, like a stretch goal I pushed myself to achieve.
I learned in therapy starting in 2018 that the reason I keep writing is because I have to. I have general anxiety disorder, and my brain... Have you seen an old-timey cartoon with a boiler? They are drawn swollen, metal distorting with steam pressure, rivets groaning and popping free. That’s how I feel if I don’t write. Don’t ask me why or how, but writing is like turning a valve to release the pressure.
(Quick PSA- my therapist calls creative outlets “coping skills.” If you feel like you have boiler brain, make time for your hobbies, no matter how tired you are.)
For me, writing is challenging play. Although I’m often conveying messages that matter to me or exploring ideas I want to work through, and I try to make the best product I can... I don’t take it seriously, and I don’t sweat over it. I’m here to wander, play, and take care of myself.
So basically, I think the recipe for producing lots of writing is: regularity/habit (do it every day, even for just a little while), minimizing distractions, separating the processes of drafting and editing, turning off criticism in the early stages of drafting, and writing for yourself and your own needs.
Do you feel embarrassed about writing fanfic?
Nope. I write for my mental health/because it’s fun, period. However, I also don’t tell people IRL that I write fanfic! But I’m a private person (I don’t tell people IRL that I’m asexual, for example, and I only tell them I have anxiety if I freeze up in front of them).
Do you feel embarrassed about writing OCs/fakemon?
Hahahaha! Look, I know there are lots of people who won’t read OCs and fakemon. I know there are probably people who wish I would stick to more canon stuff (both in terms of OCs and my strong preference for AUs).
But I’m here to write what I want, and while it makes me happy when people read and enjoy my work... It’s no skin off my back if they don’t. I already fulfilled my goal of taking care of myself.
Don’t you want to get published and make money for your writing?
No, not at this time. For everyone who has said that I have the writing skill to be published, thank you so very much. That’s so kind, and I truly appreciate it!
But... The United States has the enormous capitalistic attitude problem that endeavors are only worthwhile if they generate capital. I can’t even begin to tell you how damaging this concept is- literally, I’m not equipped with the sociopolitical educational background.
Sometimes I think I’d like to become a published novelist? But sometimes I recall that I have a dope research gig, and I wanna play around with writing in my free time.
To be clear, I’m not saying that you shouldn’t pursue your creative career dreams!!! And, who knows, maybe some day I’ll get tired of research and want to try swapping to the hobby/skill I’ve spent so much time refining. Just... Never stop doing something fun and harmless you enjoy because “it doesn’t make money.”
I’m not gonna sit here acting like I know what the purpose of life is, but I think having fun and meeting your needs is pivotal.
Okay, so how can I support my favorite fandom content creators?
Bless you, f’real. The easiest way is to comment on their stuff. For meta writers, leave comments, engage, ask questions. For fanfiction writers, leave reviews. I have so many lovely folks who chat with me over Tumblr or discord after reading my stuff, which is so great. But it’s hard to find those sweet messages later. I can always click on reviews any time I need a little positive reinforcement/boost. So, even if you’re going to talk to the writer later... Leave that review!
If the content producer uses social media, reblog their stuff to give them more exposure. Likes are for you, so you can find a post later. Reblogs are for the creators, so other people can see their work.
Things like fanart, fanfic of fanfic, cosplays, and other... fan content of fan content make our year, I promise! We love that so stinkin’ much!
Some fan content producers have a ko-fi and/or a patreon, so sometimes there are monetary ways to show appreciation.
If you’re intimated by a content producer, please remember that we are all massive dorkasauruses. I absolutely guarantee it.
How do you have so many ideas?!
Ah, I have a Future Projects page on my blog- I don’t think pages work on mobile.
But here’s the secret: ideas are the easy part. They are literally a dime a dozen. Heck, there are AU generators! Just pick characters out of a hat and use an AU generator and bam, you’re off! And even then, you don’t need a real idea to start writing! I launched Four Years on the thought of, “hahaha, wouldn’t it be a mess if the Chosen went to college together?!”
We’re writing fanfic; we’re here to play. There’s no need to crush yourself with the expectation that you must write the next hit thriller plot.
In my opinion, the much better question is: how do you manage your projects such that you complete them?
So, uh, how do you manage your projects?
I’ve established that I write fanfic to play and to take care of myself, but I do want to grow as a writer along the way. And the best way to learn how to craft narratives is to practice completing them. If you launch stories over and over and only write roughly 1/4 to 1/3 of the way through the story... All you’re practicing is how to start a story.
When I first started writing as ahiddenpath, I did exactly zero planning (see the Four Years reference above). I ended up with longfics stretching as long as 400K+ words- that’s over six novels (based on the average adult fiction novel length)!!!!! It is so daunting to work on longfics, because you feel like the ending is nowhere to be seen.
SO most of my pointers circle around always writing towards your ending, even before you start!
-Decide what you want to say with your story before you start writing.
First, “what you want to say” doesn’t have to be a big, grand theme. It can be as big as “how the trauma of their adventures impacted them after” or as small as “I think these dorks would have a good time at laser tag.”
I’m not talking about a detailed outline (in fact, I personally hate outlines). Just know what your story is about and make sure what you write points to it. If you can make the structure of your story mimic your theme, even better! But no worries if that doesn’t work out, it’s not always possible.
-Write linearly
The best way to keep moving along in your story is just to... keep writing it in order. This helps achieve regular updates, and prevents you from potentially “losing” material if you change your mind about the plot before reaching the bit you wrote already. This happened to me so frequently that I stopped writing ahead of myself. If I have an idea, I write it down, but I don’t draft future scenes. In my experience, they often never see the light of day.
I’m told people often write the bit of the story they most want to write first? If you have a single scene that you’re really longing to write, but you don’t know how to get there/don’t want to write the rest... May I suggest that you... don’t write the rest? If your scene works as a oneshot, write that oneshot! Don’t torture yourself with a lot of writing you don’t want to do. Most often, people end up forcing their way through 1-4 chapters, then stalling before ever reaching the Good Bit.
A moment of silence for all of the unwritten Good Bits out there. Now, some Enya.
If you can’t reduce Good Bit setup to a oneshot, reduce as much as possible. I think that sometimes, people underestimate the incredible advantages of writing fanfiction? Everyone knows your characters already, and maybe even the setting, if you keep it canon. You can cut out the setup and dive right into what you want to do with the characters!
-Think about the structure of your story before you start
Considering the structure of your story is a fantastic way to estimate how long it will be/ensure that there is an ending in sight from the start. For example, in Voices, I covered a single school year in Japan, writing a diary entry for a different Chosen every day, so I knew that I would write the story for roughly a year. After August had one chapter per Chosen, so each child could help Taichi deal with his post Adventure trauma in their own way, plus an opening and closing chapter. My Tri story, Tri: Integrity Lens, is written and posted in installments covering each Tri movie.
It’s fine if no particular structure strikes you. I could see forced structure turning into a gimmick, you know? But if it naturally works out, it’s a great way to have a solid idea of how much story is ahead of you before you start, and where the story will end. And being cognizant of how and when a story ends from chapter one yields a tighter, shorter fic, one that you’re more likely to complete.
-Consider writing in batches/sections before posting
So lately, I’ve been experimenting with how I deliver fanfic updates. I mentioned that my Tri fic follows the Tri movies. Each movie is covered with a few 3,000-6,000 word updates that I post every other week. I cover an entire movie before posting any of it, and then I plan to take a break in between movies to work on either the next movie or a different fic.
AND THIS IS SO GREAT! Having large chunks of my story written is such a fantastic way to do things! I keep thinking of little details I can add/things I should mention and noticing inconsistencies I can fix before posting. Giving myself a larger picture and time to mull over it by spreading out updates is making a huge difference for me.
Plus, giving yourself little breaks between installments can help keep you fresh and motivated, while leaving your audience waiting at a nice, natural stopping point. Plus, this way they know that you haven’t just... up an vanished or dropped a story. You’re just taking an announced break.
How do you plan stories?
I believe I mentioned hating outlines. I personally respond best to “structured freedom.” I focus on things like: what are my themes/what do I want to say, how will the characters grow or regress, how is this story structured or formatted, what is the overall tone and mood. Other than that, I keep things fluid... Which is why it’s so important for me to enforce some kind of ending point before I begin.
Basically, for me, too much planning = a boring slog where I can’t inject the moods and ideas of the day into my work without derailing meticulous plans. Too little planning = longfic hell. I’m guessing that everyone has to decide for themselves where they land on this continuum! Exploration is vital.
Okay, I am out of steam for today. If you have any other writing/fanfic questions you’d like answered, please let me know! Here are some other resources I’ve made.
-Combating writing paralysis with successive drafts
-Dishing with an artist
-Tips for Fanfic Authors
-More Tips for Fanfic Authors
-Tips for Winning Nanowrimo
-Resources/Advice for Digimon Adventure Fanfic Writers
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