#i really need to reread tog so i can give better answers

[gwyns]

Bestie, don’t you think there is a bit of a parallel to Bryce hating the faes and still being their queen and whatever, to Azriel hating the Illyrians and likely being the one involved with their plot? Didn’t Aelin also have some bad feelings about her people? Or even how Feyre hated the faes and then good d*ck changed her mind?

honestly i'm so glad you brought this up!! i've been thinking about it ever since finishing hofas and seeing everyone hate on bryce lol

basically, yes, i do! i personally found it very annoying that people are this upset with bryce over her hatred, like obviously it's not good but she's clearly traumatized by her father and the fae nobility?? sathia rightfully called her out and by the end of hofas she's started to realize the error of her thinking??? also saying she doesn't deserve to use her powers or fae artifacts AS IF THEY'RE NOT LITERALLY HER BIRTHRIGHT.... omfg ok let me relax before i get too heated

anyway, i've never seen this level of discourse surrounding az's opinion of the illyrians. i have seen some discussion over the years yes but never ever to this extent. both bryce and azriel's way of thinking is problematic but when you take a look at their upbringing it makes sense. they were both treated like shit by their fathers and others within their fathers' circles. there is a level of self hatred there, i think both of them hate that more than anything. it's not about the people, not really, it's issues they have within themselves

bryce has started taking baby steps to get over this and i'm hoping we'll see more development regarding that in cc4 and as for az... well it's like 95% confirmed without being actually confirmed that he'll deal with the illyria plot so he'll have to start working through his own shit

as for aelin, it's been a hot minute since i've read tog but i think her issues weren't really tied to one race of people. it was more so that she just didn't want to lead her kingdom, she was scared more than anything and she just wanted a safe place to escape to and call home, but this also falls under the somewhat selfish thinking of bryce and azriel. like do i understand why aelin wants to disappear forever? of course. she, like the others, is deeply traumatized. sjm had her work through her problems surrounding it, step up, do what's right and take back what's hers and i really admire aelin for that

now that last comment about feyre... WHERE'S THE LIE LMFAO. i love my girl feyre and understand her, good dick can solve (almost) anything. i also just think it was easier for feyre since she had to live with them for months and tamlin and lucien were pretty tame compared to... well... *gestures to under the mountain* and by that point, she'd already realized that "hey! the fae are people too, they're kinda fucked up sometimes but there are some good eggs just like any other group" you know??

[ssardothien]

Casteel and Rowan. Why.

Kris, you asked, I answered.

Here’s my essay on why I love both Rowan Whitethorn and Casteel Da’Neer

For me Rowan was a refreshing character and love interest from the moment he was introduced in HoF. I was attached to him from the very beginning, he seemed more complex to me than Dorian or Chaol could ever be (don’t hate on me for saying this, we can have different opinions and still respect each other and the characters that aren’t our favorite. I still love both of them, though I had a hard time convincing myself to like Chaol and it took me a while, but I do now). Ok I’ll start with his appearance. Let’s just admit that he’s a hottie. Tall, tanned, broad-shouldered warrior, masculine, fae ears, pretty green eyes and long silver hair. And his tattoos that are not just some doodles, but a story written down on his body, if that’s not attractive (and I’m not only talking about appearance but the whole message behind this) then I don’t know what is. And he has an accent that apparently sounds like a purr, I’m a simp. I love his personality, I love the way he’s witty around the ones he feels comfortable with. Because he doesn’t really seem to have a brilliant sense of humor, but it’s there and it will show from time to time how waggish and sassy he is. And the teasing between him and Aelin, it’s just sexy. I love that despite being through so much, despite loosing his loved ones, he’s still capable of expressing emotions (even though it takes him a little bit to open up), feeling things so deeply and loving others so fiercely. That for me is the definition of strength. The fact that he didn’t want to block his feeling anymore, that he wasn’t afraid to love someone again and be devoted to them, even though he’s been hurt before and he’s already lost so much. His gentleness, protectiveness and how caring he is toward his loved ones just melts my heart. And how he would literally give up his own life if there was a ghost of a chance that he could save Aelin by doing so. How he took an arrow that was meant for her and didn’t even hesitate. And I love him because unlike the others “Rowan beheld all Aelin was and is, and he was not afraid.” When she had doubts and thought of herself as a monster he simply said “If you're a monster, I'm a monster.” and that’s just beautiful to me. And this quote: “I love you. There is no limit to what I can give to you, no time I need. Even when this world is forgotten whisper of dust between the stars, I will love you.” I’m sorry but if someone said such a thing to me I would simply die because my heart would not be able to take in this amount of love.

And Casteel is just another version of Rowan to me, just in a different universe. And honestly there is no way for me to say which of these two is the better one, they are equals to me, not the same but similar in so many aspects, that I put them on the same place on the podium (first ofc). I cannot choose between these two. Rowan was the first fictional character to make me feel the way I feel about him and that is a deep admiration. I’ve read HoF back in 2015 and was simping for him ever since. But when I was introduced to Casteel recently I discovered that he awakened something in me, that part of me that got so attached to Rowan. He was pulling the same strings. He’s got it all. The caring and protective part, the teasing, the devotion, the wit and sense of humor, the handsomeness, the strength, the gentleness and softness, and he’s sexy okay?

I created a table, so you can visualise what I'm trying to say, here ya go:

This whole situation gave me one more reason to reread both tog and fbaa, so I will probably post some more about this in the future.

See this post if you want to know why Kris loves Rowan Whitethorn.

See this post if you want to know why Kris will always choose Casteel Da'Neer.

[little-bookshelf-dragon]

February Wrap Up (Finally)

Okay! So I’m finally getting to this...five days late. Oops. Just to clear that up, I started a reading journal towards the end of February and wanted to do entries for the month of February before making this post. I’m hoping that this will help me organize my thoughts for my reviews. So I can actually... post reviews. 

Anyway. Here we go! I’m going to begin with my overall thoughts and then go into my stats and put reviews under the cut so if you haven’t read these books and want to avoid spoilers you can! 

Overall thoughts on this month’s reading: 

I DNF’d one-third of my TBR this month (two of six. I say one third like it’s so many more than that). It’s a little funny that I had so much more success with the books I hadn’t actually planned to read than my TBR. I’m also kind of surprised that I made it through some of the books that I did, when I DNF’d other books for similar reasons. I did go into this month knowing that this was going to be a difficult bunch of books to get through, 

I think I’m going to have to adjust my Goodreads reading challenge. I’ve already more than halfway through it and its only February. I'm honestly surprised. I didn’t think I was going to make it through the 52 I had planned.  

Stats for this month: 

Total Books Read (Finished): 18 

DNF’d Books: 2

Books I need to Finish: 4

All-Out: The No-Longer-Secret Stories of Queer Teens Throughout the Ages by Saundra Mitchell, et al. 

City of Lost Souls by Cassandra Clare

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows by JK Rowling

We Are the Ants by Shaun David Hutchinson 

Academic Books: 3

A Midsummer Night’s Dream by  Willaim Shakespeare 

Young Goodman Brown by Nathaniel Hawthorne

Pride & Prejudice by Jane Austen

Ratings: 

Five Stars: 5

Four Stars: 7

Three Stars: 4

Two Stars: 2

One Star:  0

Spoilery Reviews Under the Cut! 

DNF’d Books: 

Frozen by Melissa De LaCruz and Micheal Johnston

It was a weird book. In general. And then the Scene that implied sexual assault happened, and I had to stop reading. I just couldn’t bring myself to finish it. 

Ender’s Game By Orson Scott Card

I was having trouble getting into the book in the first place, and then I realized that these were six year old kids. Being trained for war. Against aliens. As I have a sister who’s six, this didn’t sit well with me. 

Two Star Books:

Echo by Alyson Noel 

I was really dissappointed in this book. I really enjoyed the first book in the Soul Seekers book, Fated. I liked the worldbuilding, the relationship between Daire and Dace, the concept of the Echo. But I had too many complaints about this book. Mainly with Cade. I feel like I could have liked him more if he had some actual development and clearer motivations. Though, I think the attempted rape scene was a little much (that’s an understatement.) I think it would be nice if there were a YA book where the female MC wasn’t assaulted, or at least that addresses it properly afterward. 

A Court of Thorns and Roses by Sarah J. Maas

I’m honestly surprised that I finished this one, after I DNF’d another book for similar things happening. I didn't like Feyre much. She didn't seem to have much moe to her character other than painting and hunting. For someone who was meant to be so strong willed, she seemed to change her mind too easily. Rhysand...I don’t know where it start with him. He’s not much of one here, but it’s pretty obvious that they’re setting him up as a love interst in the later books. Can we stop having abusive boyfriends in YA lit? Tamlin was a little pathetic. Maybe don’t alienate the one person that’s your shot at freedom? Maybe? Feyre and Tamilin’s relationship was cute, but it wasn't really all that convincing. 

Three Star Books:

The Maze Runner by James Dashner

The Maze runner was good. I’m not sure if it was good enough to deserve the hype it received. I did not like that there was so much that was left unanswered in the beginning. It’s one thing to withhold information to create interest. It’s another to taunt your readers by having a character ask the questions, and the others refusing to give an answer. I did think the ending was an interesting twist, to stage a ‘rescue’ and then have it turn out to be apart of the trials. 

Love Drugged by James Klise 

There’s...a lot to unpack with this one. At first, the general premise made me feel a little sick. I almost stopped reading it several times thoughtout the book, especially when the chaacters described being gay as a disease. But by the time I finished, I think I understood better. Jamie was being mainipulated, not just by the doctor, but by society to think that way. His journey to discover and understand himself leads to his desperate actions in an effort to escape that manipulation. It’s heartbreaking to know that Jamie's thoughts were based off of off the author’s when he was around the same age.   

Take Two by Julia Devillers & Jennifer Roy 

I was kind of disappointed in this book. I loved the first one when I was younger, so the fact that I didn’t feel the same about the sequel is a let down. Though I guess that might have to do with the difference in age between the times I read them   

Young Goodman Brown by Nathaniel Hawthorne 

Four Star books: 

Mockingjay by Suzzane Collins 

I cried so much reading this book. Katniss yelling at Buttercup at the end broke me. Her “for Prim” before the execution was beautiful (I’ll admit it took me some time to realize she was hinting at what she was planning to do.) Cinna having a part in the rebellion even after his death. The amount that Haymitch cares about Peeta and Katniss. UGH the feels. I did have a problem with the pacing. I felt like all the action was squeezed in at teh end. And Peeta and Katniss’s relationship seemed to seesaw between them in it’s one-sidedness throughout the series. 

Duel Of Fire by Jordan Rivet 

I did not expect to enjoy this book as much as I did. Especially at he beginning, I thought the characters were annoying. But that GROWTH. By the end, I loved the characters. I had a hunch about who the rebels were, but I wasn’t sure until they were revealed. I loved the magic system and world building, and I can’t wait to see how the story will be developed in the next book and the rest of the series. 

Steelheart by Brandon Sanderson

This was my first Brandon Sanderson book and I was not disappointed. The concept was interesting, the Epics having a specific weakness kept them from being overpowered, and I loved the fact that  the “Normal people” weere the heroes (For the most part.) I KNEW there was somehing up wiht Megan. But Steelheart’s weakness completely threw me off. I had so many theories, but I was wrong on all of them. That was a plot twist done well. 

City of Fallen Angels by Cassandra Clare

(I’m actually not going to include my notes here because they turned into more of a rant at the characters than an actual reveiw) 

Galatea by Madaline Miller

I want more of this. Any additional content, I want it. It says something that she felt the only way to escape was to die (And take her husband with her). I REALLY want to know what happened with their daughter.  

The Skin I’m In by Sharon G. Flake 

This is a reread for me. I read tthis book when I, I believe,  was the same age as Maleeka. And at the time, while I had never been in the same situations she’s in, I could still relate to her. Now, as an adult working with students Maleeka’s age, I see my students. It gives me a better insight to what might be going on in their homes, thoughts, and attitudes. This is a book that so many of them should read, just like so many of them could use a Ms. Saunderson. 

A Midsummer Night’s Dream by Willaim Shakespeare

Five Star books:

Clockwork Prince by Cassandra Clare 

This book. This book. I audiobooked most of it, which meant that I was listening to it in class while working. Which means I cried. During class. This is one of the few love triangles I think I’ve ever really liked and am actually emotionally invested in. I fully understand the hype around this series. I can't wait to pick up the next one.   

The Poet X by Elizabeth Acevedo

After finishing the audiobook, I'm sitting here trying to find the words to describe how much this means to me. How many of Xiomara's thoughts and feelings I relate to. And I just can't find the words. I can't remember the last time a book meant this much to me. Wanting to find my own voice. Beginning to question the religion that has been such a big part of my life for a long time. Feeling like I have to hide parts of myself, my thoughts, my feelings, everything I wish I could say but can't, from people I care about. Wanting my own writing to mean something to others. I wish I could put what I'm feeling into words, but I'm struggling. I cried. I need a copy of this book. I loved it so much.

Saint Anything by Sarah Dessen

I feel like Dessen’s books follow a pattern. I’ve only read three so far, but I’m able to see the similarities. However, that dosn't stop them from being unique. Sydney’s problems are different from Macy’s, whose are different from Collie’s. So while the books are similar enought to notice a pattern,  they’re unique enough to keep the reader’s interest. I wouldn’t say that Saint Anything has impacted me as much as some books have, but I did still enjoy it. Also, a moment of appreciation for instances of sexual assault handled correctly? It's rare to see the subject addressed in a book after it happens. Though I would have loved to see Ames prosecuted. We need to tell girls it's okay to speak up about these things.

Tell Me Again How a Crush Should Feel by Sara Farizan

I loved this. I’m not even sue how to put it all inot words. First of all, Saskia getting expelled? Excellent. That girl made me so mad. Messing with Lila’s feelings was bad enough, but hen going stalker, assualting her, and then outing her to the entire school? I think I would have liked to see even more of a punishment, honestly. Maybe someting from her parents. LISA. I loved Lisa. I’m so happy she and Leila ended up together. They both deserved to be happy and I’m so happy they got to be happy together. I was so emotional after finishing this book.  

Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen 

I’m not going to go too in depth because then this would be way too long but this is my favorite book that I’ve had to read for a calss. Ever.