#i really liked her but that relationship was making me so anxious and it wasnt really her fault just a kind of emotional incompatibility

[theendofmybody]

i think its so unfair that good decisions can still feel really bad

[lemonyboy97]

Heyyy I like your writing, and I was wondering if you could do like fluff/comfort of like Val, vox, and/or alastor with a reader who gets really socially anxious and shuts down when they get overwhelmed?

Wasnt sure what gender reader was so i did neutral, thank you so much for the ask! I havent gotten one in forever and i was fresh out of inspo ❤️❤️🫂 love you anon! (Also i threw in different relationship dynamics to spice things up and also because i cant imagine alastor being ANYONES 'boyfriend', that man would go from 'close friend and confidant' to 'fiancé')

Pop in and leave me a request on my new blog!

Fiancé!Vox, Boyfriend!Val, Husband!Alastor (seperate) x gn!anxious!reader

Warnings: brief mentions of sadism, anxious reader (obviously), not quite my definition of a panic attack but close to it

(Im going to do some loose headcannons about each of the boiz, then include a oneshot for each of them)

Fiancé!Vox

Headcannons:

I feel like Vox would be the best out of the 3 in this scenario, as he's the least sadistic. Vox is a very protective lover, he's also compassionate and doting (behind closed doors). If Vox notices you (its really a matter of when not if because this man WILL notice) becoming overwhelmed or overstimulated he is gently guiding you away from the crowd to check on you, 'Are you okay?', 'do you want to leave?', 'is there something specific bothering you?' are FAQs (frequently asked questions) His way of dealing with the issue is removing you from the situation altogether- taking you back home, wether thats to your shared apartment or the Vee's headquarters depends on whichevers closest.

Scenario:

You and your fiance, Vox, are at a release event for the newest VoxTech drop. Vox is proudly harping about the newest Tech he’s developed, an even prouder arm around your waist; how could he not be proud with his pretty little love on his arm? (He calls you his ‘pretty little thing’, ‘little love’ no matter your gender or size) He’s so absorbed in his success that at first he doesn't notice the subtle tremble in your hands, or the way you curl into him as if trying to hide, or maybe the way you flinch at the bright camera flashes. But when you let out a barely audible whine Vox immediately turns to you, all ears.

Vox suddenly realizes how overstimulating this all must be; the flashing cameras, the loud and frantic crowd, the music in the background, the shouting, the rowdy demons who are protesting- oh god how could he have been so negligent?

Vox is immediately passing the reins over to Velvette (much to her dismay), and gingerly leading you through the crowd, towards the back door.

“It’s alright, lovely, just through here… There we go…”

His words are gentle, and the hands on your shoulders to guide you are 10x more so. He leads you out the back and to the limo, and once you’re sequestered away inside he just waits- He knows when you’re ready for touch you’ll initiate. He knows that for now, just the knowledge that someone is aware and looking after you is enough to help de-escalate the situation.

“There you go, doll, breathe yeah? In…. Out…. In…. Out… good job, love, doing so well for me”

Boyfriend!Valentino

Headcannons:

Val is definietly more of a 'what do you mean?' Kind of guy, or 'just breathe?', you know? We know from his workers (ahem angeldust ahem) that he isnt the most... understanding with weaknesses and the like. So- while I feel like Val's approach is a bit more 'deal with it by not dealing with it' than Vox's, it is still heartfelt for his wonderful gf/bf/partner. Even if he wont directly address it, Valentino is the type to try and reassure you through touch, wether thats what you need or not, thats what he's got because this man KNOWS he is brash and he doesnt want to make things worse.

Scenario:

You had walked to Valentino's studio to bring him homemade lunch after he was complaining about his imps being 'inconcievably incompetent'. You are now awkwardly standing backstage, out of sight, as he directs a particularily.... raunchy... scene. You are visibly uncomfortable with screams and various sounds of... mixed sensations.. echoing around the set, along with flashing lights and dizzying scents. Altogether they make an array of overstimulating inputs, and after setting down said lunch on a side bench, a pretty note tucked into the lip of the basket, you stumble back outside, trying to catch your breath. Val follows you shortly after, he caught sight of you from across the set.

Valentino carefully sits beside you, pulling you into his side.

"You alright there, babycakes?"

You shakily nod, but Val sees right through you. He sighs and kisses your temple as he absentmindedly rubs your shoulders.

"Thought I warned you 'bout my work hours, baby"

You slowly explain that you just wanted to surprise him with lunch and he smiles, kissing the inside of your wrist.

"Damn, sugar, shoulda started with that, hm? Why don't I pop in and grab it- then we can share it out here while you get your head back on."

Husband!Alastor

Headcanon:

This man. This. MAN. It can go one of two ways depending on where your relationship is with him- but in this you are married so- he would be so attentive- like. You would barely be feeling the 'oh hey, this is a lot' feeling and Al would pick up on it and knight in shining armor you away from it. Alastor just KNOWS. He has like a sixth sense when it comes to you. He is so finitly attuned to every fibre of your being that you cant even hide it from him. He just KNOWS. Like- you're in cannibal town (because be real y'all go on dates there all the time and Rosie adores you) and the children are being rowdy but 'its alright, i can manage-' oh and there's Susan- 'yes susan, we are married- no, no susan you cant see my ring im a bit worried you might try to eat my finger- No, really i insist-' oop and here comes Alastor, scooping you up with a charming grin, Rosie on his heels. 'Come along now darling, our dinner is waiting'

Scenario:

You and Alastor are in the hotels lobby, greeting guests for a party Charlie is throwing to 'encourage the inhabitants', Alastors hand is protectively on the small of your back like always. The arriving demons are a bit rowdy but nothing too bad- the real issue is the howling, rambunctious laughter coming from the bar, poor karoke all but screamed into the low quality microphone (much to Husk's annoyance), flashing strobe lights arouns the room turning the guests pink, green, blue, pink, green, blue, pink, green, blue-

"Dear?"

Careful fingers snap in front of your face- effectively lurching you out of your spiraling thoughts. You swallow thickly and look up at your husband, shaky smile plastered on your lips.

'Yes, Al?'

He frowns as he gaze flits from one eye to the other, then, his mind seemingly made up, he summons his shadow, scoops you up, and shadow travels back to you twos shared room.

"Oh lovely, this certianly wont do"

He dotes on you, rubbing your tense shoulders, kissing the crown of your head, murmuring sweet nothings to your skin as he lays you down in your shared, king bed. And later, once you're half asleep and content in his arms, he lovingly murmurs,

"No more of Charlie's so-called 'parties' for you, my sweet"

A/n: Reblogs are always encouraged and appreciated! And yes i did like my own post. I am very proud of this, i wrote it in one day WHILE (legally) high on loopy pain medicine

[whole-circus]

I was wondering if you'd put your depiction on the creepypastas if the reader was a Tomie Kawakami like entity. I don't know if you have ever read or seen this character by Junji Ito or not so only do this if you're comfy

PS: have good day, hydrate and rest °v°

Creepypastas with Tomie Kawakami like!

➥ with Jeff the Killer, Jane the Killer, Eyeless Jack, "Ticci" Toby, BEN Drowned, X-Virus

Hi! I just LOVE that idea!! I must say I enjoy reading Junji Ito's works (even if Tomie wasnt my fav)! Here you go hun, if you want some other characters feel free to say! >:3 Good day for you too, take care! Also you waited so long im sorry, I had to made small break and now I feel like my "work" is shitty!!!!

˚　　✦　　　. ˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚. 　　　✦　　˚

Jeff the Killer

Okay I feel like at first Jeff would pretend that he is not into you..who knows why? His own deep insecurities? Or he just doesnt like the idea of how flirty you are? You know, he usually is the one making first move and toying with others (making them obv uncomfy, he act like definition of "white straight good guy" lol). But no worries, he does find you absolutely cute, thinks you are prettiest person walking on earth (and you are all that actually). Listen, he wont magically turn into huge simp..but! you make him feel things. Congrats, you have high chance to broke Jeff and make him lovely-dovely on his weird way towards you! No matter if you are already in relationship with him or not, he gest pretty possesive and jealous over you! Come on, you cant be all pretty and cute AND have everyone all over you! People who adores you might end up dead before you will be able to kill them. Definitely would try threaten people to stop talking to you..its up to you if you find it cute or scary tho!

Jane the Killer

Jane gives me huge femme fatale vibes so i feel like you would really vibe together (no matter your gender)! And come on!! She understands the need of revenge like no one else!! Jane wants to beat Jeff ass! Adores you so much..not only you are absolutely gorgeous but also pretty smart too! Appearance matter in some way to her, but I think she would actually be into intelect and personality more than how you look like. And the fact that you are such a great manipulator!! You will make her fall in love with you even more. She is such a cutie im telling you! Jane is jealous but she puts that aside all that aside and she just worries about your yeah well technically you cant die, but what damage your brain will damage your brain and stay for long time! She doesnt want you to get hurt, even if you are doing the big scary job here!

Eyeless Jack

Demon partner with demonish partner? Isnt that perfect? Yeah yeah, you are diffrent from eachother but definitely have common ground, arent you? Dunno why but I feel like your charm wouldnt work on him just becasue of what he is. That doesnt mean that he doesnt find your ass cute tho! He just you know..its not really obsessive but more of actual feelings. Even if other pastas fell in love with your character too, then Jack would be a bit diffrent and at first fell for who you are and not what you look like! When it comes to possible of jealousity, he is not that much of envious about people who you flirt with/or they flirt with you! He clearly understands that you do it more for your..entertainment and to cause chaos (and maybe some sort of revenge). Also he is immortal, you are immortal - best couple to ever exist! You will spend eternity with eachother so he doesnt have anything to worry about!

"Ticci" Toby

Damn reader, you will break Toby! He gets so shy and so blushy around you.. Especially if you are flirting with him! Doesnt really like the idea of you and other people being a bit flirty. He gets jealous easly and it leads him to being insecure and doubtful of himself - he knows that he is not perfect, and all your actions make him even more anxious. Toby does care so much about your opinion so he just bottles it all up, not wanting to mess up even more! But I bet you are smart human being and feel that something is wrong. Just reassure him that you love him a lot and he is way diffrent than people you talk to (well, he is in fact atill alive, isnt he) and he is good to go!

BEN Drowned

Ben is Ben, not a simple thought in his head. Yeah kidding, but he just cant help but simp over you so so much! Like he is down on his knees at your service the second he sees you! Dont get me wrong, you are not only what you look like but its the first thing he notices about you! It would be almost too easy to manipulate him, but we dont do that here..(at least I hope so). Anyway, he literally worships you, you are the most good-looking person out here! And he is a ghost, he has seen a lot. About your habit of flirting around and then watchin somebodys downfall? I cant say he is not jealous, but he wont show it. Also finds your actions pretty funny. Who doest like to see someone dying becasue of their stupidy? Yeah, definitely not Ben, loves the chaos you cause.

X-Virus

Cody enjoyes how flirty you are! Okay well, maybe he only enjoys that if you are flirty with him! For real, you get him all giggly and blushy to be honest. Its so easy to tease him and so fun to look at! Propably tries his best to do the same but fails miserably. Your relationship give me a bit of nerd x popular partner vibe lol! You know, he literally spends half of his time in lab or studying for fun + Cody propably stinks. Now here you are, having such a mesmerizing appearance!! (You are fun to be around to, lets not be so vain!) . At the same time he asks many question, its just in his nature to enjoy knowing things. He just cant help but wonder what or who are you..but who wouldnt want to know that?..And please try to get idea of testing you or making small experiments out of his small silly head!! He is weirdo like that! But at the end of a day he is your weirdo!

˚　　✦　　　. ˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚. 　　　✦　　˚

[a-random-weeb]

Hiii love ur account! Idk if I can request cause it says it’s closed, so sorry if I’m wrong!

Can I please request a yandere who looks very dominant; tall and buff with muscles. Literally everyone is scared of him because of how frightening he looks. Everyone other than Reader: Yandere is actually scared of reader and is very submissive around them. He actively seeks Reader’s approval and will do anything for her. Kind of like a guard dog? He’s really just a big puppy who craves Readers affection. Thank youuuu

Awww I love this idea!! Let's name him... Austyn, idk it just fits lol. I couldn't think of what age to make him, so I said screw it and put yall in high-school because that's the easiest

Also I know you requested this months ago, and everyone else requested their things months ago, guys I've been so tired recently, I'm so sorry I haven't been able to write what you've been wanting me to. I'm so sorry if you're still waiting on your request, and I'm hoping I'll get more chances to write soon. Thank you for your patience :)

Warnings: Yandere (obv), clingy and obsessive behavior, a little more than just mentions of murder, slight mentions of rape (not to reader or anything i just noticed it was brought up so I figured I'd put it in just incase), reader gets forcefully drugged, kidnapping

This fic is not meant to romanticize unhealthy and toxic relationships, it's hot af in fanfictions but is never ok irl

°•.♡▪︎*~°•.♡▪︎*~°•.♡▪︎*~°•.♡▪︎*~°•.♡▪︎*~°•.♡▪︎*~°•.♡▪︎*~

A huge man towers over you, his shadow engulfing your entire figure, his huge muscles and rough exterior making him appear as if he could kill. He stares down at your petite and fragile body in an intimidating manner as you jolt up in a sitting position. Clutching the desk beneath your upper body, you recognize him almost immediately.

"Where am I?! What do you want?!" You scream dramatically, almost tipping backwards in your chair.

"You fell asleep in class." His eyes narrow. "I had to poke you a bunch so you would wake up. The bell just rang, its lunch time." Your whole face burns a cherry color.

"Um- thanks..." Your eyes wander anywhere but his face. The corners of his mouth ever so slighty elevate as he leans on your desk.

"Would you like to eat lunch together?" He tilts his head slightly in an almost cute way. Your brows furrow in confusion, but nod regardless out of pure fear. He could probably kill you in one hit. No, simply him blowing on you would be enough to knock you 8 miles. You pack your school supplies and walk to your locker, Austyn almost breathing down your back as he watches you grab your stuff.

Entering the cafeteria, you both take a seat in one of the only spots left in the overcrowded area, its a bit shocking when kids start scooting away from you both, even the kids across from you want nothing to do with your new 'friend'. Or thats at least what you hope he wants with you...

Your prayers were answered, but in the worst way possible. It's almost physically painful watching Austyn attempt to make conversation with you. Stuttering over every second word, obviously embarrassed and anxious, fumbling with his hands. It was... cute. You'd never thought he would be like this while talking to him, you've seen him be rude and cold to everyone, maybe he's just shy and comes off as rude? Guess you'll find out. You, having not as many friends as you'd like to have, appreciate the attention from him regardless. But he desperately needed help with this whole social thing, so you give him a hand.

"If you're not busy, maybe you could help me with homework after we finish eating?" You smile, hoping he's not busy before you die of embarrassment. Thankfully, he nods, and the two of you finish your meal in silence.

You were hoping he'd be a little more outgoing and not as awkward in the library, but boy were you wrong. More stuttering, more avoidance of eye contact, more hand fidgeting. He wasnt even helping, just sitting there and watching you, almost too intently. You almost scream of joy when your best and only friend, Abby, joins you.

"Hi!" She beams excitedly, taking a seat next to you, "need help?"

"You're my savior!" You giggle, hugging her. Austyns aura immediately chances from a shy puppy to one that could kill. He glares daggers into Abby as she speaks a bit too friendly to you, gets a little too close to you, helps you instead of him. He knows he needs to up his game, but your stupid friend might ruin his chances.

Abby was your friend since elementary school, you've never been great at giving anyone a smile, but she always brings out your biggest one. She's helped you through so much, you owe her your life!

The rest of lunch Austyn stays silent and in the background, you assume he's shy... God, you hope that he was not hurt. You continued the rest of your classes like normal, overjoyed when the day comes to an end.

You and Abby walk home together, teasing and laughing with eachother. Austyn trails behind you both, not talking too much. Neither of you know where Austyn lives, and forget to ask. They drop you off at your house, and Abby lives just across the street so you guess Austyn walks her home. The long between your houses and the school is 30 minutes. You could take the bus, and you do in the mornings, but the walk is too beautiful to miss, so fun laughing with your best friend through the sunset in the city, too fun running through the long field of grass, racing down the streets, seeing who can reach your house the fastest, rubbing it in your face as you both either collapse on your porch or Abby goes home. Sometimes, you dance outside together, sharing secrets, giggling over whatever crush the other one has... Abbys friends with almost everyone, but the two of you are inseparable. Tonight though, you only talked with Abby, not wanting to make Austyn feel left out, and not wanting to seem awkward infront of your new friend. You run inside, jumping into your bed, thinking Austyn is just a little cute. Maybe a tiny crush? You don't think on it too much, as you pass out.

The next day, Austyn starts hanging out with you and Abby, which neither of you mind. He's a bit less shy and a bit more friendly. He's in your homeroom, science, and math class, so you sat next to him in all of those. You guys talked and exchanged answers from time to time, overall getting along very well. You guys hang out at lunch, and sure, you give a slight bit more attention to Abby, but thats it, and overall, the three of you get along like three peas in a pod. The next four days go similarly, your crush for him grows.

One lunch time the three of you meet up, eat, and head to the library. You weren't sure what was wrong, but Austyn didn't seem to be a huge fan of Abby, only hanging out and attempting to make conversation with you, almost cutting Abby out. You, of course, refuse to let that happen, and keep adding your friend the the conversation. You and Abby exchange a confused look, Austyn normally loves you and Abby.

After school the same day, you run over to Abbys locker, waiting for her to grab her stuff. You wait for 5 minutes... 10 minutes... 20 minutes... she doesn't show up. Thinking it's a bit strange, you still wait, assuming she was held back in class or something, as the teachers often like to praise her work or offer her opportunities for an upcoming math competition or something. She appears, after awhile, running towards you. The two of you begin to walk home together. When you ask her what she was doing, she awkwardly dodges the question. You leave her alone about it.

The next day when you arrive at school, Abby still didn't show up. How strange, you think to yourself. Abby hasn't missed a single day this year, not even when she was sick, you have no clue how she does it. Straight As, no days missed, friends with everyone she talks to, yet she's not here. You couldn't help but feel a pit in your stomach, not wanting to assume the worst. You would've thought she'd at least text you right? The more you thought about it the worse it got. What if she was raped by a creepy teacher?? What if she was kidnapped?! Maybe she got a deadly sickness and has three days to live! There's so many possibilities you weren't sure, what if-

"Hey!" Your new 'friend' from yesterday appears before you, looking like he's accomplished something great.

"Hi...?" You look up at him, calming yourself immediately. You knew you shouldn't overthink this, she probably just missed her bus or something. Austyn obviously picks up on your torn face as he asks,

"Hey, are you ok? You look offput..." he does his signature, puppy-like head tilt. you quickly nod your head, laughing to yourself silently of the stupidity of your overdramatic thoughts. You weren't normally so anxious, this over worried about your friend not being at school immediately, but for some reason, your gut was screaming at you that something bad happened. And then... The overwhelming feeling to run hits you. Looking at Austyns smile fills you with a strange sense of dread. White noise echos in your ears.

"Woah, woah, calm down!" He panics, "Hey what happened? You look like you've seen a ghost!" Hes acting way too friendly today... you shake your head.

"I-I don't know what's wrong with me today? I guess it's just a weird day....?" Austyn rushes to wipe some tears you didn't notice were were falling from your eyes.

"Hey, you don't have to talk about it...." he sighs "I don't know what happened, but stop worrying."

Abby was murdered.

You don't know how you know, last night was such a haze... what happened...? Pictures of her dead body flash in your mind, the killer standing there with a knife and sadistic smile. You swear it was a dream... you remember beginning your walk home, but can't remember anything passed the midway point, not even what you did last night, did you even eat dinner? You didn't wear pajamas last night, you assumed you were just tired when you woke up. But did you really see Abbys murder or is this just the most dramatic you've ever been on a Wensday morning?

You continued your day like normal, the sinking feeling never leaving you. Austyn was acting strange, outgoing and sweet to you. And yet his face was making you want to throw up for some reason... to go as far as to flee the country. Well, maybe not that far, but you certainly didn't want him near you for some reason.

The end of the days comes, and your dumbass told Austyn he could walk you home. It was probably fine, you'd go to sleep tonight and tomorrow everything would be normal, Abby would be at school and Austyn wouldn't be as creepy to you. You're sure of it.

You wait for him near the entrance of the school, and of course, when he comes out, he's almost stumbling over his own feet to run towards you.

"Hey!" He gives a huge innocent smile as he begins walking with you, clutching the arms of his backpack in a shy manner. You smile up at him, not sure if it's a real smile or not. No words are exchanged as you both watch little cracks of the sunset through all the large buildings of the city. It wasn't cold, but it definitely wasn't hot, the perfect night for a first kiss. Stars beginning to appear as you make your way out of downtown, you've only been walking for 15 minutes... almost the midway point... you have a much better view of the now gone sun, there's still a bit of red. There's no one around, it's a gorgeous night, you're walking home with a guy... everything should be perfect, it should be romantic. You recognize this, Deja vu, but different.... memories from what you think to be the dream, or a cruel reality you weren't sure yet start to appear. Abbys lifeless body in the long grass, the moonlight to the killers back, you know who it was, but you can't remember.... all these events took place just upahead and-

It wasn't a dream.

Blood stains lay in the grass and you point to Austyn, not in control of your body or the words that spill from your mouth, or the tears that spill from your mouth, or the puke that's about to spill from your mouth.

"You did this... didn't you...?"

Austyns eyes darken, "and you remember. I knew the sedatives wouldn't work as well as I wanted them to..." he sighs "I did this for you, don't you see?! I killed her for you. I've loved you for so long and you've never even looked at me. So I stalked you, learned about you, you're so cute yknow! You never laughed the same way around me as you did with Abby, ramble to me as you did with her.... So now our problem is gone, and we can be the cutest couple!" He spits delusionally. You back away from him, the moon to his back, the same spot as last night. He grabs your wrist harshly, overpowering you easily.

"You can't run darling, now let's go to my house!" He beams, "I'll even bring you home the head of someone you don't like!" You thrash around, screaming for help, but Austyn just giggles and hugs you to him, holding one hand around your arms and torso and the other over your mouth. "Shhhhh, it'll be ok!" He puts a chloroform filled cloth to your mouth, and everything goes dark.

Maybe I'll write a part 2, maybe I'll do headcannons, maybe I'll leave you guys to imagine the rest, we'll see :3

[bassguitarinablackt-shirt]

hey do u have any hcs for leo, reyna, or rachel?? :)

I DO INDEED!!!! although for my leo and reyna hcs keep in mind im only on son of neptune so im coming from a place of limited knowledge

leo:

that boy is NOT cishet. hes pan as fuck and his gender is whatevers funniest to him in the moment

listens to beyonce and lady gaga religiously

had crushes on both jason and piper

has really fucked up teeth, personal hygiene who?

basically lives off of coca cola

keeps trying to jokingly flirt with percy, annabeth is not happy about this

I JUST KNOW THIS BOY WOULD BE A THEATER KID, not a performer though hed be backstage

really likes painting and drawing but hes not exactly good at it so he doesnt do it often because looking at his art makes him hate himself

almost always listening to music

has really bad seperation anxiety

hyperaware of the fact that he is not and will never be charles beckendorf, gets really insecure when the other hephaestus kids talk about beckendorf around him

reeses pieces are his favorite candy

this last one is kinda weird and specific but i like to think he has a stash of ring pops that he keeps with him at all time to either eat when hes anxious or use to jokingly propose to people he finds cute

(wow im projecting hard for some of these)

reyna: (not alot for her agh im sorry)

aroace. i take no criticism im right about this

i wouldnt exactly say shes not cis but she does have a bit of a weird relationship to gender

had a bad case of comphet (compallo???) and it took her a while to realise she was queer

really protective of nico, has basically decided hes her younger brother and she would both die and kill for him

has ptsd that she refuses to adknowledge

listens to a weird mix of classical and emo music (the emo is nicos influence. shed never admit she likes it though)

RACHEL ELIZABETH DARE MY BELOVED:

AROACE AROACE AROACE-

good friends with thalia

never actually had feelings for percy it was just a good ol case of comphet/compallo

going back to the thalia point, her favorite band is green day, thalia introduced her to them

the pjo character whos most likely to smoke weed i think

vibes with being a cis girl but she does enjoy engaging in gender fuckery on occasion

after she realised she wasnt in love with percy she thought she was a lesbian, she was not, she just found girls aesthetically attractive

in a qpr with percy (let me have this okay)

experiments with her style alot but generally refuses to wear an outfit if it doesnt have atleast five bright colors

dyes her hair alot, never the full head just streaks

[luckybitch1]

since ive been back home i try to get along with my mom but i cant. we just dont get along. when i go out with her i try not to speak or to show any emotion, it just happens naturally. i go out with her to make her happy and to do the right thing i guess knowing that she wont be around forever. i have this perspective that the past is the past i know why we cant have a relationship and i just dont hold it against her anymore because i dont know. i just stopped. i realized one day she is who she is and i really cant control that or that i was born to her and not someone else, somewhere else. it feels surreal sometimes because i tried so hard to run away and erase all of it. to be honest i wanted to erase myself and disappear. i wished i was someone else. i dont know what i wish now.

it will feel so good when i move away again and i hope this time around i truly will find home somewhere else with someone. but for now i dont have a choice. im trying to be responsible and not to hastily act out of fear again. i want to do things responsibly, do things above board and trust my gut even though its going to take longer than if i just got another service job, saved as much as i can, and left to get another service job. you could say im being pragmatic since this way i have options for a while longer and can pursue graduate school again, this time what i actually want to do with what i know now about making a living. again not just out of escapism like last time. my perspective was so different. i wanted to just burn out like a star out of loneliness and despair. now i want a life..

it makes me lonely to be here. ive been so lonely forever, i come from a hostile house full of lonely people, a lonely family, all i ever knew was hate and isolation. its root rot. i miss my little dog and i dont want to lose anything else

when i was going to sleep last night because i wasnt distracting myself on purpose my mind just wandered into my feelings and thats the key i found this month, my loneliness. i see how it weighs me down and makes me sick and crazy. i see how it tortures my father. i see my mothers guilt and denial and i want to turn away

its not supposed to be this serious all the time. the only reason it all feels so awful is because im surrounded by loneliness and have been for far too long. when you find light it touches every corner and the shadows are nothing but depth in the picture

i wish i didnt keep my head bowed. i wish i didnt feel anxious and sad around my mother, i wish i could be above it. but i just dont connect with her and when im around her, i feel so drained and tired, it shows even in my eyes. once it was so simple to just leave and never look back but now i cant ignore the guilt i feel because i pity them both, whether or not they deserve it. my soul is wasting away the longer im here. how do i preserve myself until i can go? and how do i go without feeling death closing in on my life like an unwatched pot boiling over

im trying but its not good enough. im not energetic, im not clever, im not focused. im dragging a burden im too weak to shoulder and all i can think is though i cant face this alone i cant reach out i just dont want to everyone in this whole world is a stranger to me and i dont want to be touched.

its a nice cool day. my dog is in the grass listening to the wind. theres no one in this house but me, him and in another room, my mother

[kuumara]

ok lets go

usually the original post is alright and its the comments that are weird, but not this time. bc i could say the exact same thing ab mcdonalds, that they would be disappointed crying pissing screaming etc when they see s5. i personally think more ronaldmcdonaldasses should be ok with a byler endgame, but if i said this they would all cry piss scream shit

--

yeah, he did say he's scared of losing her. but as the saying goes that you've prob seen from alot of other stuff, "if you love something you're not afraid to let it go". so idk ab u but mike saying that just confirms that the relationship is toxic and if it continues it might even turn into an emotionally abusive one, IMO (its a pattern- ur anxious the partner will leave, u start being more cautious around them; even turn into a whole another version of urself u think the partner will like more (mikes lenora drip), etc etc. very stressful for u (mike) and also ur partner (el)).

"he's clearly inlove with eleven" idk it wasnt really clear to me when she offensively side-eyed him at the cabin and then he rolled his eyes or wtvr that was, which was literally the last time they interacted. not really madly in love healthy relationship of them tbh. and its EL not goddamn eleven that alone speaks volumes ab how much they care ab her well-being or character arc or wtvr their other excuses are (they say mike leaving her would crush her, but so would if u called her eleven in her face)

"it would go against everything we've seen in the show" i agree with this one. except, byler not being canon would go against everything blablabla 🤓 like, we've seen this happen before with steve and robin, this would just be even more bombastic.

then, the show dunks on homophobes all the time so Macabre canon would go against that too; and yes, it would be homophobic to use a gay character's CONFESSION and FEELINGS THAT ARE ALREADY CAUSING HIM PAIN to uplift the straight couple, making them happy married with 17 kids while the gay character is in even more pain and like dies or smth

--

holy shit i thought yall were exaggerating when u said they actually think mleven is love at first sight.

1) the duffers wouldnt "suddenly scrap it", ppl have been finding subtext and set design clues since the beginning, since ep1. no its not delusions, its stuff for which there isnt any other actual explanation. it all makes sense, every subtext reference, every set design prop, every decoration on clothes- theres even an official st video on yt where the set design says she put triangles on robins clothes bc shes gay asf. Guess who else has triangles on his shirt (which he wears for majority of the show, might i add)? MIKE -but that just means he likes girls!! just like robin, to shut down any theories the fans made ab him liking guys!!! hes a lesbian😭😭😭

2) im assuming these are hard core fans, since theyre still in the subreddit and all that, and i dont doubt theyve seen the stranger things twitter account say they don't believe in love at first sight. so the writers=write the show. don't believe in love at first sight, it's just cheesy (infatuated) 12yr old shit. so, why would they include smth they think isn't real, unrealistic even? except if they're saying mike and els love isn't real-

--

alright final one. the classic "yall delusional" argument. Nothing else to say besides we are seeing patterns and we are recognizing them. not my fault ur not as observant and intelligent🙄

[noxiatoxia]

hi i wrote this like bulletpoints bc im not making this an essay. tldr youre kinda right but kinda wrong and this isnt new but kaorus issues DO get resolved we just dont really see him say "hey!! my issues are resolved :)) ". he lives through the things he was anxious about and survives so we can see it gets resolved. just in a shitty way.

ep 16/karuizawa arc> kaoru tries to help hikaru and himself to have their own individuality by experiencing different types of relationships and increasing their emotional maturity

ep 21> kaoru describes the cindrella metaphor. the dynamics in the club are the carriage. (haruhi/tamaki as daughter/father noted)

>tamaki is the one leading the carriage, aka the dynamics. hes the "leader" in a sense.

>once tamaki realizes he likes haruhi, they wont be platonic like a father/daughter anymore aka->

>the dynamic is gonna change

>hikaru also likes haruhi

>in this situation, hikaru might care a lot about haruhi and might not take this well especially after "replacing kaoru" (i assumed this is how kaoru feels bc hes later relieved when hikarus w haruhi and he still seeks out kaoru to make sure he's ok)

>this complete dynamic change is going to seperate the host club

>but hikaru seeks him out first after haruhi and hikaru are trapped

>he is sure that the dynamic issues and a group break will happen when the dynamic between haruhi and tamaki change and time passes by (whichever comes first) but so long as he's hikarus first choice he's fine with it

>kaoru assumes tamaki creates a family scenario so everything can be platonic as long as possible, but is shocked to see that tamaki wasnt willingly doing this he was just fucking stupid

>this creates a crack in kaorus way of thinking, his ~deep~ theory is just a conspiracy (that he made up due to anxiety but he doesnt realise it yet)

>hani say "kao and kyo are as oblivious as tamaki" implying that they trust the host club to stay together in face of struggle

ep 25

>the host club is facing the struggles kaoru was scared of and in a sudden, unprepared way. tamaki is leaving (might leave and then leaves), kyoya's family suddenly seems disappointed aka he might pull away from the club entirely, in the end theres a lot of changes in the club. they lose hani and mori first in the battle (graduated), then kyoya isnt coming (pulling out for future plans/family pressure), they are running after tamaki as a trio when hikaru gets hurt.

>in the pumpkin patch when doubt is highest and they are thinking about how this is surely the end, we see haruhis flashback to her dad about not hesitating when the time is right. even though she doesnt have the need to continue, she still does because she /wants/ to. AND she succeeds. this would show kaoru that there is no "spell" or some uncontrollable event that would lead to the end of their friendship, and that he can keep it alive just by working on it

>the fact that the show ended the way it did (with tamaharu happening TO keep the dynamics alive + all members working their hardest just to keep it all going) wouldve been enough to curb kaorus worries because it was physical proof that even when the things that he feared happened the group didnt fall apart and even got stronger

>so he lives through his fears becoming true and it gets resolved symbolically. obv i would want there to be a 40 min episode where kaoru goes to theraphy and resolves his issues including the incest kink but the last few episodes were rushed as fuck

Hi! Never disagree with me about the carriage ever again I'm going to fucking kill you. (<- this is a joke i am joking im not mad at u u are my friend)

I've talked about this before -- about what the last episode symbolizes in terms of the carriage allegory. But it was an old post so many people probably haven't seen it.

To showcase why I disagree we need to first realize what the carriage allegory actually stands for.

In short, the carriage is the anime's way of implementing Kaoru's depression arc from the manga. If you're unaware of that, the tl;dr is very similar to episode 21 just without Cinderella metaphors. Scared Hikaru will leave him, scared he'll lose his friends, etc. Except in the manga, Hikaru and Kaoru actually talk about this, culminating in Hikaru dyeing his hair but reassuring Kaoru they'll always be together.

In my mind, the carriage is obviously a stand-in for this. But... It's also trying to serve to be a plot device to set up the end of the show.

My guess is the creators probably thought Ouran would get a 2nd season but it didn't get greenlit, so they had to wrap things up very suddenly, which is why the ending feels as rushed as it does. This is just a theory though.

The carriage, as it is presented in episode 21, clearly is setting up a major plot point: the dissolve of the host club. And since we as an audience are lead to believe Kaoru's word is to be believed, we're also like "oh, shit, is the host club gonna fall apart?"

cuz keep in mind, through this episode and episode 16, the show presents Kaoru in such a way that makes him seem "smart" and "wise" and that his ideas hold some sort of weight to them.

So, to recap, the carriage allegory in the anime is two things: 1, a character-driven arc about Kaoru's fears and 2, a plot device to set up the ending of the show.

This is where the "resolved" thing gets tricky.

The carriage is resolved on a plot-level. By the carriage hikaru, kaoru, and haruhi were one falling into the pumpkin patch, yet still saving tamaki in the end, shows that even though the "spell" ended, they still managed to get their happy ending. The club did not fall apart.

But, keep in mind, Kaoru's side of this equation -- about the fears of growing up, drifting apart, being different from his brother -- are not touched on.

To say it was resolved because of the pumpkin patch thing I think is just...wrong. At best it's incredibly lazy writing.

Tamaki & Kyoya had character-driven arcs, too. Ones that were presented throughout the whole show. And those actually got resolved in the final episodes. Yes, they were still open-ended endings, but they were acknowledged. That's what I'm pissed off about when it comes to the carriage. It doesn't get fucking acknowledged ever again. Not even a little bit. The best we get is symbolism that only, as I said, solves one half of the puzzle at best.

for further reading here's this post and this post.

[in-my-feels-probably]

Hi! It’s no worries I’ve been around this app long enough to know it’s kinda buggy lol. Anyways, I actually remembered just now I wrote out my request in a random google doc before I sent it and never deleted it so I have able to just copy/paste!

Congrats on 1.7k!! May I have a romantic hunger games (it can be either the original films or the newer one) option 2 match up please? I go by she/her and am bi with no preference, so any gender is fine.

I’m about 5’5, dark blue eyes, medium length hair thats kinda too dark to be dirty blonde but not so dark that its light brown with slightly lighter blonde highlights throughout. Ive been told I typically wear what would be considered 90s type of style but leaning away from more feminine things tho I’m not opposed to dresses and all.

I do get pretty anxious when thrown in certain situations rather that be talking to a group of people or just one person. But on occasion and definitely when I get to know someone I never stop talking. I am a ranter and rambler which means I could be ranting about something that happened and then start talking about something else that may or may not be related to the original subject. Basically I will always find something to talk about though I do enjoy listening to other people talk. I am considered the mom friend because I tend to be the most logical. Im also a very determined, stubborn person who usually is kinda pessimistic but still has a huge imagination. And despite all the anxiety I am usually a relatively confident person and am not afraid to take up for anyone I care about. Also I am pretty good in school despite having a kinda bad memory. Also an INTJ, Sagittarius, and Ravenclaw.

I absolutely love writing and have for the longest time rather that be random original stories I make up or the various fanfics I have(lol). I also love drawing and painting and recently realized I’m actually pretty good at making art related to animals and the occasional landscape. I’ve also been a big music fan since I was a kid, I honestly dont know what I would do without it. I also really enjoy reading when I get the chance, like I could spend hours getting consumed by whatever I’m reading. Which also travels into me when I’m watching things. As in I spend a good bit of time just binge watching new or old shows. I also really like walking around and enjoying nature. Theres a few nature trails I love going on and would go to the zoo every weekend if I had the chance. Which also goes along to my love for animals. Also I do like going to random places with my friends.

And thats about all I can think of to say, hope it wasnt too much lol. But anyways, thanks in advance :)

hi!

thanks for participating :)

since you have no gender preference, i’ll tell you who i ship you with out of both the boys and the girls, and then do the full thing for who i think you’re better suited for.

i ship you with katniss and peeta! i’m gonna go with katniss for this, hope that’s ok :)

katniss is absolutely not a people person. small talk makes her uncomfortable, and putting on a mask and playing a part doesn’t come easy to her. there’s a handful of people she’s comfortable talking to, and the rest don’t matter to her. she’d understand your apprehension getting to know people. but she’d feel pretty special when you opened up to her and started feeling comfortable venting and rambling. she may not be one for talking, but she does like listening. and you could listen to you talk for hours about whatever you wanted, happy to listen. you’re very alike as people. your values, your view on life, your temperament and your personality. you both being headstrong and stubborn could get in the way of your relationship sometimes, but you’d always manage to make her go soft around you. you’d be one of the few people that make her happy and help her feel relatively calm and safe, so she wouldn’t want to ruin that with petty arguments and bickering. you’d learn to work past it together quickly so you could get back to the simple things.

katniss doesn’t have much time for hobbies. plus, i don’t think she really allows herself the time to be idle. you’d have to constantly remind her to take a break and relax for a little while. she’d be too impatient for reading or art, but she’d enjoy hearing what you were reading about or working on. it would give her a sense of domesticity that she craved. and later on after the rebellion, she’d slowly start feeling more comfortable joining you with your hobbies and finding some of her own. i don’t think she considers herself to be a very talented person, but she would get a small sense of accomplishment and pride when she found a hobby she both enjoyed and was good at.

—

the place she’d most feel at peace would probably be the forest. walking along the streams, hunting for deer, just breathing in the fresh air. it would be a place she enjoyed going alone, but eventually, she’d start asking you to go with her. she’d show you all the best places she’d come to catch something or just clear her mind for a little while. it would be peaceful and quiet, which she’d love. one day, she’d ask you if you wanted to bring along something to draw with. she’d take you up to a ridge she liked to sit at, letting you sit down and draw the landscape while she hunted for a few minutes. eventually, she’d make her way back to you, sitting down next to you.

“no luck?” you’d ask when you noticed her coming back with a full quiver and no kill.

she’d shrug, setting down her bow. “found a few wild turkeys down by the river. some of the hens were nesting. i didn’t want to bother them yet.”

you’d nod, going back to your drawing. she hadn’t been gone that long, but you’d already made significant progress drawing the ridge and hillside that led down into the valley where the meadow was. you could feel her eyes on you as you worked, and you’d eventually feel her chin rest on your shoulder as you started drawing one of the trees, making you smile. you liked when she was soft like this.

“that’s pretty,” she’d murmur, fascinated by the way you worked. “peeta could’ve used you down at the bakery if he knew you could draw like this.”

“i wouldn’t want to upstage him,” you’d joke, knowing what peeta used to do took a lot of time and skill that only he could make look easy.

she’d chuckle, and you could feel her smile as she looked over your shoulder. “i don’t think he’d mind.”

you’d sit in silence another moment before deciding to take a break, setting your things down. you’d watch the ridge together, peering down through the valley where the spring flowers were just beginning to grow.

“you never told me we had flowers like this in the district.”

“they only grow in the spring,” she’d explain, resting her head against your shoulder. “my father told me the soot from the mines stifles them before they have a chance to grow. but out here in the meadow, they’re untouched. they can grow a few feet tall if they’re not harvested right away. you can use the roots for medicine…i used to bring prim some.”

you could hear the hurt in her voice at the mention of prim’s name. she’d grow quiet again, her eyes locked on the ridge. she was afraid if she looked over at you, she wouldn’t be able to keep it together. you figured it was best not to pry about it—not now, at least. instead, you’d pick up your drawing, handing her a few pencils.

“pick a few colors. i want to draw the flowers in too.”

she’d give you a small smile and nod, immediately reaching for the green pencil. you’d grin, setting the rest of the pencils down as you began working again.

“i should’ve known.”

—

thanks again for participating! i hope you liked this :)

[entei]

diary april 2023

happy day after 4/20!!!! things have been very hard for me... learning to be an adult is very scary. lots of new obligations here and there.

im making good progress on my diagnosis although i havent even begun the arduous process of finding medication, but at least i have something to look forward to.

my cat has been having a lot of health issues and im extremely stressed out about it. every time she seems better i notice something else. shes seen the vet multiple times and they have no answers for us. she is the most important thing in the world to me and i feel so sick worrying about her. she really needs to be okay... i dont know what else to do :(

ive been hardcore avoiding the internet in hopes that i wouldnt add to my existing stress, but my break has definitely turned into procrastination. now im quite anxious about getting back to work. ive been really struggling with creativity right now and i cant make anything it feels like. my savings are on their last legs though, i really need to get back to it before im totally broke.

in good news ive continued to enjoy my current meds. My doctor wasnt that surprised when i brought up adhd and wondered if getting it figured out would help with my depression and anxiety. i really hope so... i feel so helpless to my scatterbrain right now. i have a lot of hope for feeling proactive again soon.

my personal relationships have been going quite well. i dont feel lonely anymore! i have a lot of people really important to me in my life. spending a lot of time with someone. mending some burned bridges. i really love my friends.

staying motivated has been really tough. thank you so so much to everyone whos been incredibly patient with me adjusting to all of this. i really shouldve anticipated this sort of time in my life to be chaotic, i did NOT plan far enough ahead.

[hffnjue4y]

my mood is unstable these days.

some days i feel like im on cloud 9. everything is perfect. we have hardships ahead, but theyre all manageable and worth it. they feel far away, and unclear. on those days, i cant even grasp what it is about her im so stressed about.

and then, like a switch, it can change. i feel unsure, stressed. it usually happens when we dont talk (she’s asleep right now) things feel hopeless, everything feels pointless. it’s like im exposed to a side of the world i never had to consider before- through her eyes. how much she was hurt, how much shes still hurting. how much she has to deal with. and it hurts me. i wanna live in oblivion again sometimes. i didnt know how much of this world i wasnt seeing before.

i tried talking to other people, they often make things worse- i dont wanna feel like i have to defend this relationship. i want people to be happy for us, not worry about me. and i know typing that makes it all sound incredibly abusive, which it isnt. i dont know what to do anymore.

i love her so much. i think i need to address that attachment we have. this often overwhelms me just how much she occupies my mind, her, our relationship. i think im starting to understand what she told me back then- about how loving fictional characters means theres no expectations back. they cant disappoint you. real people are way harder. and i think i didnt know it so far cause i never let myself truly attach to anyone.

now there are stakes. we’re both emotionally involved, to a point where we can hurt each other a lot. and thats scary.

i worry about her being “unregulated” but then again, am i regulated? my mood swings so dramatically. i overthink. i talk too much about this relationship but no one seem to understand. im confused. im not sure what i want in life anymore. i want to be away from here, i want her close with all my family and friends. i want her, im scared of her (our relationship and attachment). i get really nervous and anxious around fights, aggression, loud noises, and sometimes she triggers it.

i dont want to stress her out anymore. she’s doing good these days, and i think this stress will pass shortly. i dont feel like bringing her down with my uncertainty and doubts all the time- im afraid she might think im gonna leave her. we need to fix our trust, but i think only time will tell here.

talking with mom today freaked me out. she doesnt seem to trust this relationship will last. mom’s view of my girlfriend means the world to me. i wish they could meet. im afraid that when they meet mom wont like her, or worst, shed think she isnt good for me. im afraid shes seeing things that i dont. but she also doesnt have the full picture.

i dont know how much of things right now come from the fact that im unemployed, but at my grandparents place, feeling directionless. i think i might be depressed. and someone i love is so far away, its almost impossible to cross that distance without committing in a way. so of course its scary.

today i woke up from a nap feeling pretty bad. i missed her texts and the part of me that still hangs to her desperately wants to spend every moment together.

HOW. DO. I. MAKE. THIS. HEALTHY?

was this doomed from the start?

whos to say whats healthy and whats not?

are these fears common, because im new to relationships of this level?

if i have the thought, does it mean its true?

things to do:

- do. not. put. your. emotional. well. being. after. anyone. elses.

- trust you gut??? i have no idea anymore, this changes every day.

- mental illness isnt the end of the world. it makes things hard for her, yes, but its not unlivable. trust her to do her best and support her.

[space-cops]

my latest weird little fucked up dream because I had to post it somewhere with more than a paltry 200-something character limit

i wasnt the person in the dream but it was first person pov. I HAVE TO SET THE SCENE BECAUSE IT'S RATHER EXTENSIVE??? there were five of us living in the same house. it was a great big, very old victorian style-ish home with many, many floors. i don't remember how many but we didn't use the higher floors. everyone in the house was vaguely together in some sort of relationship? i think?? the bonds were definitely more than friends in some cases but it was really vague idk. on the bottom floor (b), two people lived there and they had lived there the longest. the two people who lived in the bottom floor mostly kept to themselves and we all were okay with this. they weren't mean or anything they were just sort of anxious and liked their space. i was closer to one of them than the other, but they were still very standoffish despite this and i was chill w it. they had lots of books and decorated the area in very soft, pale colours. there was a piano and i remember being told it was never played. it was very open and had lots of natural light. i knew in the dream i spent many evenings there reading with them and having dinner. the next floor up (1) lived a young man who used a wheelchair. he had the entire floor to himself but spent most of the time in his room, which was a typical sort of gamer-y room. several screens, dark but clean, lots of different forms of media. he was quiet and sweet, and i noticed he would watch me more often than the others. i knew in the dream setting we spent lots of weekends playing games together. the next floor (2) was where i lived. it just. was a house. i don't remember how it was decroated specifically but there was a particular hallway with a window at the end. it had a radiator beneath it. the bathroom was located on the left, and my room was on the right. the walls were sage green and the floors were a dark natural wood. i cooked a lot for everyone in the house and was always bringing food to everyone. i did not spend a lot of time on my floor. i seemed to be everywhere but my floor and I do not know why. the 2 floor ups (4) lived a woman who played the piano and sang and it was the softest purest sound i'd ever heard. i remember waiting at the open window at the end of my hall to hear her play in the morning. i used to bring her fresh fruit from the farmer's market in town, but the dream never left the house? if that makes sense. I do not know what was on the third floor. I did not go to the third floor. Nobody went to the third floor.

The house was beginning to fall apart. I knew it was starting to fall apart. We were having problems with the water periodically, and i was keeping up with fixing it myself but it would always act up again in a week or so. I noticed a slightly raised part of the floor by my radiator, just a small corner by the pipe leading into it. the problem was duly noted and would be fixed later. I went down to the bottom floor to visit the two people there. One of them had died. They died in the night. Their body was laid down on the floor and the other person was curled up next to them, and i remember begging for them to get up, to let me call the police, to let me do something. They were not speaking, they just stayed next to their housemate, staring at them. I remember thinking that they were dying too, and there was nothing i could do. I was told to leave, and hesitantly did. On my way out, I noticed part of their floor was buckling near the plumbing. "Oh, this is worse than it was last week." I went upstairs to the next floor. He was packing everything up. "There's water, somehow. I'm making sure everything is packed in case something goes wrong. Can you help me?" I helped him, packing everything up neatly except for a handful of things he wanted to risk for his own ease and entertainment in the meantime. I remember sitting on the edge of his bed, facing a window, which was open for the first time and he said "You never sit there. Are you okay?" and I shrugged and told him I was okay. He said "You look so different in the light." I laughed it off. As I was leaving I noticed some of his pipes were actively leaking and thought, I have to go downstairs to turn the water off right now, but for some reason I did not. I went to my floor to start making everyone dinner, and that's when my pipes started leaking. I noticed it by the window first. Water was coming out from under the bathroom door but I couldn't open it to see how or why. I couldn't open my bedroom door to start moving anything Important up onto the bed. The water had to be going down into the floors beneath mine and instead of worrying about my stuff, I started worrying about everyone else. I went down to f1 and started bringing his stuff up to the third floor, knowing that the problem was the worst on f2. it took hours, but I got it done. The wood flooring was buckling so badly I had to carry him and his wheelchair out and i brought him up to the third floor. He was worried about staying there, but I assured him it was okay. "You care so much." I went down to the bottom floor. It was full of water but it was so clear and it was so bright down there that I couldn't see anything. I kept calling out to the person down there and I wasn't getting an answer. I tried walking through the water but I could barely move in it. I remember begging for them to come out, to come find me, to let me help them, and they still wouldn't answer. I managed to get to the water supply and turned it off, but I had to go back upstairs. It was very cold, and I remember the combination of how bright it was versus the bitter cold made me uncomfortable in like. a non physical way. the vibe was really scary. The woman on f4 did not answer me, and she wouldn't open the door. She kept singing and playing but wouldn't come out to help. None of the lights were on on her floor, but I never noticed any damage either. The problem only reached my floor. I got f1 set up on f3 and once everything was set up, we started talking about our housemates on the bottom floor. "We have to leave them there. They are gone. Please don't go back." but I knew I had to go back. I kept seeing them laying on the floor together and I had to help. "You cannot go back down there until there is no water. You can die." And I did not go back. I called someone to help with the water and they came out a day later. As it usually goes with dream logic this was fixed in like a week. Everything completely back to normal. At the end of the week, I stopped listening to my housemate and went down to the bottom floor. The repair people didn't say anything about the people living there but at this point I knew that where they lived was separated from the utilities, so to speak, so they probably never ran into any of them. They never asked what was in the other rooms down there. I opened the door and I don't? Remember what exactly I saw at first? But there was almost nothing in there. It was empty, and cold, but so bright. The piano was gone. The furniture was covered in this white? stuff? I remember thinking it was a fungus or something? And eventually I entered the part of their floor where I had found them last and the two of them were still there, on the floor, with their blanket. I rushed over and the housemate that refused to let me help was staring, open eyed at the ceiling. I thought they were dead. Half their face was covered with the blanket. Suddenly they blinked, looked back at me, and started sobbing. I fell on my knees and pulled them from the blanket into my arms and they were soaking wet. "You came back for me. You came back even though he told you not to. You still love me? Are you mad at me? I couldn't leave, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I love you." And the way my heart hurt, the way my entire person was in this horrible physical pain from the amount of emotions I felt holding my housemate was what exactly how i woke up feeling and I literally never ever ever want to feel that way ever again :)

[justineps]

ok this hit home like no other.

“And by the time you realized it..” - i was too traumatized to even notice my own subtle actions at the time and had to be asked what was i doing at that exact moment, sitting alone in the corner of a place i rented to myself, which i had previously been doing continuously for nights in my own “home” so nothing blew out of proportion.. almost every night. I remember i started to breathe really hard after i heard her ask, thinking if i should just go sit outside to make things better for “her” like always, got too anxious to talk, embarrassed to move, because those feelings started to seep through my body, ridding the essential desire to survive which pushed me up until this day. I’m not in any way racist, but filipinas always end up feeling like theyre somehow my cousin from sone long lost jungle. sorry, that’s just how ive thought about that since i was a kid, and it’s nothing bad. It’s just i think in the end I really cannot find myself anything more than attracted to just someone of the same race, knowing how marriages in this ethnicity end up. She felt like my younger female cousin. She would actually always try to talk to me when i was younger and before we got all separated. Those two weekends I spent in vegas because I was homeless was the best financial thing for me to do, and I guess spiritually as well. It was like therapy for each other as to why things werent working in her relationship, and why mine had ended, or even worse, I had made her turn into someone i would have never even been interested in speaking to, especially the way she was towards me on the last day. We spilled everything, she didnt have friends, i didnt either. I even took some time of the day to read parts of the Bible with her to help her find her meaning of what got them together. But, at the same time, I desperately was doing the same even if I didnt know who I even was with last anymore. The second week, i was a mess. A lot had happened to me when i got back, got in fights, robbed, left outside to just look at the night sky.. *everything.. is still so clear in my head as i type this* I remember I only had less than $100 left. Thats.. not enough for much here in California. So I went back since the owner of the AirBNB liked me and let me stay for two days, but had to find a third and fourth place. That part wasnt hard as long as youre just nice to the drivers and follow their recommendations. That girl got a bit mad I didnt tell her I was there alone since she saw how I was in the corner last time, but told her I’m fine and just here because of what I can afford and be safer with. I took up her offer in driving me to the station the next morning and talked for a bit. Thanked each other and i had hoped she found her grounding and happiness the day they wed. And as for me that day, i guess just my grounding and will to keep going, even after finding out what I had already expected and crushed me. Although this time, my life really was endangered if I hadnt put full focus as to what moves I should be doing next, so there was no time to mope and feel like wet broom.

.. If I kiss a turtle or something, would that count as the last thing I kissed? Since.. princesses and frogs… lol ok im jk, ive gotten much older and everything is in the past for me. When Ive said that, someone had asked what if the past just ends up uncontrollably coming back? Well… i mean logically, it’d just be a renewed present, or at the very least would hope to be renewed? Just go with it … nothings forever, nothings too short

٩( 'ω' )و

[pouringmyheartoutforpaper]

i can’t stop thinking abt like semi vanilla sex with soft boyfriend steve… but he’s obviously daddy because casual dominance mixed into bedroom dominance 😚🤌

and he’s such a dirty talker “i know honey, you’re okay. i know, feels so good doesn’t it? daddy’s here. not going anywhere”

just so sweet and loving🥺

i have a very anxious attachment style and i just want him to hold me and fuck me and when i grab on to him he just shh’s me.

HERE IT IS. 'TIS DONE

Euphoria (s.h.)

i am so sorry i got SO carried away when i saw this ask. i had to turn it into a longer fic. thank you so much and i will def be using this again <3

first time fic, smut, fluff, shy!reader, reader is referred to as angel, bc y/n makes me cringe :< I based this off of the stancy sex scene bc steve in that makes me swoon.

steve is a gentleman, first and foremost. so when his angel starts to get desperate, he knows its time to come up with a plan. she doesnt even notice that shes showing it, but of course, steve analyzes her every move. hes worked out what she likes and how she likes it before they even talk about sex. poor angel is shy about all of it. she wants him, really bad. but hes taking things slowly for her own good. shes had one relationship in the past that shes still unlearning, hence why shes so shy around him. learning to look at sex as something enjoyable as opposed to a chore. angel wanted sex with steve, she didn’t dread it like other times.

steve made her feel safe, and genuinely beautiful. he makes her feel like a princess. angel was surprised when he kissed her and it felt good. it was passionate and felt like home. it didnt feel like she was being used, it felt like mutual adoration and love in a physical form. god, it felt amazing. she wanted more.

five months of comfort and bliss later, steve hasn’t made one sexual move on her. he appreciates what she gives him, but he knows they have all the time in the world. he knows shes "it" for him. shes his best friend. his angel will make it onto his lap, but when things pick up she gets shy. why wasnt he making a move? does he not want her?

which brings them to where they are now. steves hands wandering over her body, her propped up on his lap. her pretty sundress that started all this was riding up her thighs. her chest pressed into his. it was getting harder and harder to be a gentleman. he could see her lace bralette through her dress and he was ravenous. every bone in his body was aching to rip it off and kiss her all over. but he wouldnt. he would take her out first. make sure it's perfect. make sure its magical. make sure it's not on his living room couch at three in the afternoon.

“steve” it came out like a whimper “want more”

his breath hitched. and all he could think of was making angel his little wife.

“yeah baby?” he grips her hair a little, and rubs his thumb up and down the little area of skin right below her temple and next to her ear. “i want you too angel… how about ill take you out tomorrow night? and we’ll go from there ,yea? want you to think it through m’kay? ill give you whatever you want, you just have to ask.”

steve picked her up at five. of course, because it's steve, a candlelit picnic was in order. he had everything set up in the back of his BMW. opened the trunk, making sure a blanket was placed down before everything else. he didn't want her to get her dress dirty.

he was obscenely obsessed with the pretty white dress that went just above the knee. it had pretty little frills on the bottom, and a straight across neckline a few inches above her nipples. a shiny gold and pearl necklace, strappy gold two-inch heels angel fished out of the bottom of her closet. he was practically drooling. feeding her chocolate strawberries he bought at the farmers market down the street. she made flower crowns out of the little dandelions around the blanket. his heart full of love for her.

back at steves house, angel changed into her pajamas. some pink silk pants and one of steves sweaters. he made some tea and put out her favorite snacks on the coffee table for when she came back down. snuggling up to him and thanking him immensely for her day, and allowing her to stay over. to which of course he told her that he should be thanking her.

hours and hours of hugs and kisses that lasted a little bit longer than intended later, it was around eight at night.

"honey, do you wanna get ready for bed? i can put on a movie for us in my room if you want?" steve whispered as gently as he could into angels ear, lips brushing over the shiny earrings she was wearing.

"yes, please. thank you" it came out small, she was nervous. he can tell. he took her face into his hands, rubbing at her cheek lightly.

"listen to me doll, if you just want to watch a movie or cuddle or- just- whatever you want to do, I wont be upset. at all. i promise. i don't want you to feel nervous."

she smiled. " 'm not nervous,-" a little quieter, looking down at her socks, "im excited. just scared that I wont do a good job."

"hey, thats not what it's about babe, there's literally-" he scoffed, "- no way you could do anything wrong. promise." his hands wrapped around her waist, lifting her up and spinning her like she was a princess, making her laugh again. "if you want something just let me know l'right? if you're even like a little tiny bit hesitant you don't even have to say anything okay? no big deal" he held his hands up, emphasizing his last statement.

she gave him the biggest sweetest kiss in the whole wide world, the kind that made his brain go fuzzy and gave him a high that nothing else in the world could.

"c'mon babygirl" he broke the kiss, "gonna lock up the house, kay? go ahead and go upstairs 'nd lay down. ill put a movie on."

as he made his way around the house, steve went over everything he knew she loved in his head. images of her heat rushing to her cheeks, eyes blown wide, pretty thighs pressing together. steve knows what he's doing in bed, and he knows that. so he's not too nervous about his performance. he knows he can satisfy his angel, and he's anticipating every second of it. but the thought of undressing her, seeing her exposed and beautiful, had his breath hitching and his jeans getting tighter as he climbs the stairs to his bedroom.

a soft knock on the door, "honey, can I come in?"

"yes steve"

"hey baby-" and that was all he could get out before his jaw dropped and his pupils blew to two times their original size.

there she was, standing in his bedroom, with that same heat in her cheeks, same blown-out eyes. but this time, his angel was draped in a sheer lace robe that was hanging open, revealing her bare skin donned in sheer, floral lingerie. her nipples peaking through the fabric, skin glowing in the warm light from his bedside. a real-life angel.

"i-" she looked down at her feet, one arm swinging over her stomach in an attempt to cover herself, suddenly feeling very vulnerable, "-i thought it was pretty-"

"you're so gorgeous baby," closing the gap between them immediately, wrapping his arm around her hips, pulling her closer. placing his hand on the side of her freshly clean face. "I love you so much." capturing her lips in a fairytale kiss, trying to express as much love as he can with the gesture.

his arms wrapped around her waist, lifting her up into his arms. steve swears he's in a dream. angel's legs wrapping around his waist, grinding her cunt onto his stomach and devouring him.

"do you want me, love? tell me."

"yes please steve, 'm ready"

he lowers her onto the neatly made bed. he prepared his room the best he could when he woke up this morning. fluffing all his pillows, and washing his comforter. a bouquet of roses with her name on the tag laid on his bedside table.

"i love you, so so much sweetheart." his voice is soft and sweet, gentle and loving.

"i love you too."

slow, passionate, and messy kisses. slotting himself between her legs before pulling his shirt off. leaning down to kiss all over her face, smiling into each one. he moves down to her neck, licking and kissing all over. he finally lays his lips onto her jaw and sucks the soft skin into his mouth. a strangled moan leaves her lips. arching her back and running her hands all over his chest. steve pushes off his jeans and places a firm hand on her waist.

poor angel’s eyes widen at the outline of steves cock through his boxers. her face heating up and her hips moving on their own. it was huge. she knew steve was big. lingering stares at his bulge in his jeans (or sweatpants, or god forbid those little shorts) but seeing it so close was amazing.

steves hands traveled up her hips, right below her breasts. he stopped to look up at her. “is this okay lovey?”

“yes steve”

his hands palmed her tits over the veil of fabric. kneading the skin in his hands. placing kisses over both of them and humming into her chest. poor, poor angel. shes moaning at this point. making steves cock painfully hard.

“more please?”

he grinned. cocky as ever. “‘course baby.” before moving down her stomach, kissing a trail all the way down to her thighs. opening her legs and sucking the skin inside. working his way up till he got to her pretty, pretty cunt.

his soft breath on her. her scent flooding his senses and making him swoon. all he could think about was the beautiful angel in front of him, and how bad he wanted to eat her pretty pussy.

“can i kiss you here?”

her face flushed and mouth open above him made him melt. “please” she sighed, desperate.

his lips came down to place a kiss right on the front of her panties, before moving upwards to her pretty nipples. his jaw clenched from fighting the urge to devour her. kissing each of them before reaching to unhook her bra, asking her sweetly if he could take it off.

“yes steve, i love you”

shes just so adorable and desperate he just adores her. unhooking the floral fabric and sliding it off her arms. he gazes at her pretty tits, red around the nipple from how sensitive she is, and a small gasp falls from his lips.

“so beautiful baby. my good girl.” and angel is bucking her hips up towards him at his praise. unbelievably horny and already a little cockdrunk. “yeah, you wanna be my good girl? let me make love to you sweetheart.”

“i love you stevie,”

“i love you angel, always” and hes so content. adoring her, touching her, loving her. he moves down to her panties again, warm breath on her swollen clit. “is it okay if these come off angel? you look so beautiful in them, but I just wanna see you hon.” smiling fondly when she lets out a little “yes please.”

he hooks his thumbs onto the waistband, pressing kisses all over it before sliding them off. angel moaned when her cunt was hit by the cool air. steves eyes on her like he was going to ravish her. she was soaking wet, clit red and swollen, clenching by itself every few seconds. “so pretty,,,can i touch you here? ,,please baby.” briefly sitting up to admire his angel completely bare. cock throbbing and heart pounding.

“please d-stevie” and of course he knows what she was going to say. angel has called him daddy before, mostly jokingly, but hes an observant lover. so obviously he notices how much angel loves it when he takes care of her. he expected her praise kink, and he expected her to let “daddy” slip out once or twice. everyone called steve daddy sometimes, as a joke. but he liked it a little too much when she did it.

he kisses her sweetly, lips tangled with angel’s. before moving down to her pretty pussy. licking his lips before gently touching her folds, opening up her pretty flower. she whined and moaned. pretty little head filled with only thoughts of him.

"so pretty baby, so fucking beautiful. love you so much" reaching one of his hands to hold hers firmly, grounding her in reality. kissing up her thighs before coming back up to kiss her. "is everything okay?"

she smiled, both of their hearts warm and content. "yeah stevie. i want you."

passionate, loving, mind-blowing, earth-shattering kisses that stopped time for the next twenty minutes. his hands roamed all over her, her fingers twirling in his hair, making him moan into her mouth

steves fingers started to drag down her stomach, goosebumps decorating her skin as his palm rests on her clit. taking her bottom lip into his teeth before kissing her deeper. steve wants to get her ready for him, but shes so ready for him to let go and fill her up. angel's fingertips trailing down his happy trail, dipping under the waistband. pouting at him.

"what'd i tell you love? ill do anything for you, you just have to ask me." and he was right. he didn't do anything unless she specifically asked for it, which was why he was still straining against his boxers.

"want it off." pushing the fabric down unsuccessfully. pout still very prominent.

"thank you babe," and hes picking her up off the bed and switching their position swiftly. "you want to do it or me angel?"

"me! me." she said a little too quickly, making them both giggle a little. she leans up to kiss him, still grinning. pulling the waistband down his hips, slowly exposing more of him. just seeing the first few inches of skin showing had her head spinning and her face heating up. steve places his hand on her face as he lifts his hips a little allowing him to get rid of the extra fabric. moaning as his cock hits the air. springing straight up and lifting a weight off his shoulders. so delighted he almost didn't notice his angel's face. her eyes glassed over, mouth opening subconsciously. gazing up at him and letting out a small whimper. admiring him completely, the prettiest cock in the world.

"steve..."

"i know beautiful, y' look so pretty. cmon lovey, give me a kiss." maneuvering her face back to his. a soft grip on her hips, kneading the skin and rubbing up and down her back. heat pooling between their legs and flushing their skin. angel's fingertips trailing up the soft skin on his chest, gripping and kissing him everywhere the position would let her. his fingers find her cunt again, fucking her open on his hand slowly. her mouth open and moaning into his mouth.

"steve, steve, steve" she pulls away from his lips, staring at his flushed expression. "I wanna help you."

"fuck- alright sweetheart. go easy on me babe, want to stay like this forever." shifting his weight to make her as comfortable as he could. her lips trailing down his stomach, kissing and trailing her nails down his sides, making his hips jerk.

"can I touch you stevie?"

"i-" a deep breath racking through his body, "i'd love that baby."

the feeling of her lips kissing the neatly trimmed hair around his cock has him gripping the bedsheets. throwing his head back and groaning before immediately forcing himself to look back so he won't miss anything. gasping when her hand wraps around him, thumb and index finger lightly brushing the tip of his cock. "jesus christ babe. yeah,,, good job baby; keep going."

and she does just that, stroking him from the base of his cock all the way up to the tip. he's moaning filthily, almost embarrassingly. her lips meeting his tip in a soft kiss, making him shake a little, smiling down at her.

he has to pull her off of him when it gets a little too much for him. he still wants to last another hour or two, and with the way her mouth is moving on him makes him think otherwise. rubbing her shoulders as he pulls her back up to him, kissing her sweetly. flipping their position to where he's hovered over her. pressing their foreheads together.

"you want me to keep going hone-"

"yeahh-" it's a long and drawn out whimper. a soft smile and a chuckle leaving his lips in response, leaving them both giggling a little bit. giggles that quickly turned into moans when his hands went back down to her cunt, kissing her as softly as he could once again. his lips pressed against hers, making them both feel hazy and soft.

"okay baby, you gonna relax for me, yeah?" his hands coming back up to her torso, stroking slowly and sensually. moving down to her hips, lifting them up and placing a pillow underneath her. his angel's cunt exposed on display for him. his wandering hands back onto her body, leaning down to kiss her. pressing their bodies together, her soft tits against his chest, bare skin pressed together, making his breath hitch. his cock starting to press against her clit, creating friction as he started to rock against her sex. his angel whimpering and quivering from how sensitive she is.

"shhh, ive got you baby. ive got you. that feels good yeah? i know honey. god- you feel so good baby. good girl. my good girl." her pussy pulsating and contracting at his praise.

"want more steve, more please, i want you inside of me, please."

his eyes roll back into his head a little bit, feathering kisses onto her collarbones before leaning back up just enough to look at her. savoring the way her face turned red, a soft flush over her chest and neck. all the way down to her vulva, flushed and swollen with arousal.

"yeah baby? yeah? you want me inside you honey? want me to make love to my pretty girl?" voice breathy and adoring.

a whisper. soft enough that he could only hear because he was so in tune with her. "please daddy, love you stevie, please."

"oh baby, -fuck" stroking his cock before lining himself up with her lips, spreading her arousal around with his tip. "deep breath for me sweet girl, deep breath. ive got you okay? gonna take care of you. make love to my pretty baby. tell me if you want me to stop babygirl, ill be gentle with you, 'kay? ive got you."

finally, steve grabs onto her propped-up hips, kneading them soothingly. rubbing up and down her torso while he spreads her cunt open. legs open wide for him as he slides his thick cock inside her. the head of his cock inside her as she lets out a moan thats almost a scream. the stretch is euphoric. slightly painful, but it just fit so good inside her. making her throw her head back, giving steve a good view of her neck and tits.

his jaw slack and head thrown back in pure bliss. loud moans leaving his lips to match hers before leaning back down to her face.

"shh, shh, i've got you baby, good girl. i love you so much. you okay?" his cock halfway inside, massaging her clit with his thumb. working her open around him.

"'m okay stevie, want more please- steve!" his angel begged him. her voice desperate, making him shudder. he moves his hands up to hers, intertwining their fingers and rocking his hips into hers. leaning down to kiss her while he bottoms out inside her. her pretty cunt fluttering around him as he buries himself inside her. his lips moving down to her neck, sucking and biting the soft skin into his mouth. reveling in the way shes reacting, back arching and chanting his name.

"love you so much. god youre beautiful. you feel so good baby. so good." he groaned into her neck. steve imagines this is what heaven feels like. he's so in love with her, an all-consuming, comfortable love that makes him feel completely whole. a passionate love that makes him feel red hot and desperate.

"i love you so much steve, so much. feels s' good." her hand caressing his face, pulling him in for a lazy sensual kiss that makes time stop. his arms pulling her legs to rest on his hips. pulling away slightly to whisper into her lips.

"you want me to move, sweet girl? you feeling okay?"

"im okay steve, are you okay?", he smiles softly, providing a sincere affirmation. "please steve, i want you. all of you. forever."

he has to fight to not tear up at how much her words really affect him. the emotion and passion in the room being shared between the both of them. intoxicating and euphoric.

"i'm so in love with you," his hips pulling back and rolling into her again. moans filling the room, the sound of him making love to her messy cunt flooding his system. a deep, sensual rhythm developing. the trail of hair on his pelvis and stomach becoming increasingly slick. holding each other as close as possible, love flooding them with every intake of breath.

rutting and grinding into her. her hands running down his back and trailing kisses up his chest. gasping when his fingers pick up an unrelenting pace on her clit. working together to bring each other to the edge, enjoying every second of it.

"oh- steve" he could feel his angel's cunt clamping down on him. his cock twitching, so close to finishing. he's been close for the past hour, holding himself at the edge to make sure she finishes first.

"yeah baby? fuck- my good girl. what do you need from me sweet girl?" his thrusts becoming faster and more desperate, groaning and moaning into each others mouths.

"'m close stevie, 'm close"

"i know, i know baby. i love you, i want you to cum for me, sweetheart." the pace of his fingers on her clit remaining constant as she follows his orders. letting her climax build to its peak, babbling and desperate as he continues to work her through it.

"im gonna cum with you lovey, cum for me." and that's all it takes to have the knot in her stomach unravel. white hot pleasure racking through her body, vision blurring, and shes almost certain shes seeing stars.

"steve!" her moans mimicking screams, body writhing and jerking with her orgasm. enough for steve to let himself cum. his own orgasm flooding her cunt. muscles tensing and relaxing, a long, guttural moan falling from his slack jaw, eyelids fluttering shut and back open again to look at the angel in front of him.

euphoria

bodies relaxing and falling into the sheets below them. steve kissing up her neck and pulling her into another time-stopping kiss. still inside of her, holding her close to him and treating her like the most precious thing in the world. rubbing soothing circles into her cheek as he pulls out. comforting her when she whimpers.

"youre the best thing that's ever happened to me. that was so amazing. i love you so much." steve rasped, absolutely beaming at her.

"i love you so much steve, i think i just ascended." sending them both into a fit of giggles and kisses.

"i think I did too babydoll. lets get you cleaned up."

[oh-for-fic-sake]

The Deal Part Three

Summary: august doesn't know how to lose.

Warnings: Adult Situations +18, Slight Smut, Mentioned Threesomes, M/M, M/F/M, poly relationship, Toys, Seduction, Dom Sub, BDSM, Praise Kink, Swearing.

August hummed running a finger back and forth on the rim of his glass as he watched the screen,you were on the bed rocking onto your new toy like crazy.

"She really does this everyday?" Clark asked from beside him with a frown, but august could see the kid was turned on, licking and biting his lip as you fucked yourself desperately with your new vibrator.

"Everyday, for a week now..." august hummed twisting his chair to and fro flicking his gaze from the subby on screen to the soon to be sub sat beside him.

"... am i? Am i not enough?" Clark asked tentatively blinking at agaust in a way that made the agent smile smugly.

"Its not that kid, shes gone without playing our game for soo long she forgot how addictive it is, how much she needs it" he explained.

"Needs? Have... i mean shes missed it?" Clark uttered feeling less confident in his ability to satisfy you by the second.

"Probably not, well not untill our little experiment"

"Why?" Clark asked still not understanding

"Being a sub is... more then just sex, subs need to submit its therapeutic for them... when in a scene they just let themselves go, all worry and stress disappear. All they need to do is live in the moment and obey" august began slowly as he stopped swaying his chair and faced clark head on pinning him with a look.

It was there, the curiosity. Good. Its what he hoped for, it was why he'd called clark there to 'catch up'

It was time to make his move, top the man of steel whilst having you making your own little porno in the background to help things along.

"So she cant truly relax without it?" Clark muttered still unaware of the agents motives.

"In a sense yes. She craves being dominated, its as natural to her as being a goody two shoes is for you" august purred placing his drink on the glass computer table fendingnoff a smirk as clark took the bait.

"Hey! Im not a goody two shoes-" the kryptonian grunted offended.

But august was prepared, he'd planned this meeting meticulously and his anwser rolled off his tongue with a laugh.

"Your thirty five years old and have absolutly no run ins with the law, no parking fines no speeding tickets hell you never even had a single detention in your entire shcool life! Or have you handed in an assignment or book report in late"

"But i killed a man- i took a life" clark tried to argue but was waed off with another laugh.

"Zod was no man, he was a fucking alien... no offence, you took a life to save billions... so its not really making you a badass"

"Lazer vision is pretty badass..." clark huffed slumping back in his seat now looking like a classic putig brat.

"Oh? Is my litttle clark sulking?" August cooed gravely voice making clark pause at the sultry tone... he must be hearing things.

"Im not sulking! And im not your anything!" Clark growled snapping at the agent.

"Behave yourself!" August growled leveling him with a look, and couldnt help smirk again as clark shut himself up and flushed.

Your desperate cries called out over the moniter as you rutting onto the toy the wet sounds adding to the scene.

Clark flushed finalky turning away from august making the agent preen. Oh he had him in the palm of his hand already~

"Good boy. You are arent you? A very good boy clark- the best" august purred leaning forward gazing at the younger man with a cheshire grin, that only grew wider as clark flushed brighter and shuddered.

"I.. err well yes" clark panted shiftingnin his seat tryingmto keep his eyes on the screen as you wailed and yelped trying to draw out a climax.

"Oh whats this? Your going all shy on me? Tell me is it because i called you a good boy~ do you like praise clark?" Augusut grinned leaning closer still to the now frozen younger male

"N-no its err... i should go-" clark started shuffljng backwards needing to get out of here, because it was true. He loved praise especially in the bedroom, he loved being told how good he was.

August purringnat him whilst he eyes were fixed on you rollingnaroundnin bed toying yourslef into a sexual frenzie was... making him think of thingsnhe probably shouldnt.

"No. Sit, stay... thats it, theres nothing to be embarrassed about, many powerful men enjoy being praised" August growled latching onto clarks arms holding them to the arms of the seat.

"Being taken care of, told what to do~" august purred standing befor the mighty man of steel leaning close to his face.

Clark gulped but didnt move back, he didnt pull away like he should have.

Instead he eyed augusts lips, clark had the overwhelming urge to.aste them.

It confused him, he'd never ever dabbled in same sex relationships, never experimented. Never shared a woman with another before that fatefull night.

But for some reason august was apealing, drawing clark in. August was apble to overpower him, not physically but he commanded obedience.

August held a dangerous cocksure demeanor that clark rarely saw.

"Is that what you want? Clark~ do you want to be controlled and praised just once? More then once?" August hummed dippjng closer and closer, clark couldnt help tipp his head up.

"Y/n is always such a brat. Just look at her, desperately trying to fuck herself into a coma, despite knowing we hadnt allowed her to touch her pussy" august pulled the pffice chair clark was sat in to closer to him, making the kryptonian drown in his scent, the cologne and sweet arousal that was alreading sworling arohnd him.

Clark swallowed dryly, unsure what was happeningnto him, the sounds of yu moaning a crying ot so sweetly, the praise and authority radiating off august in waves.

It was the same dominant aura and comanding deep voice that had made crks cock twitch in both threesomes they had indulged.

Clark had tried denying it at the time, convincing himslef he was cuaght up in the erotic forbidden act. It was just a thrill of the moment thing. It didnt bmean he wanted the older dominating alpha male and all his bravado.

August grinned shifting forward again filling clarks vision, for a human auguast was large, almost as large as he was.

"Sure she'll listen when she feels like it but... I can't help thinking she needs a role model..." clark hummed absentmidely nodding agreeing falling further into his own haze.

"Someone else to show her how she should behave... someone who will get rewarded for being soo good... maybe a good boy?" August purred finally taking the plunge and weaving jis way around the man. His words coiling around the younger male ensnareing him in his carefully constructed web of teasing words.

Clakr gasped as his chin was captured by the agent forcing him to look him in the eye.

"Would you like that clark? Do you want to be not just a good boy, but my good boy-our good boy?" The words hung in the air, winding the man of steel.

"W-what?" He stuttered tryingnto fathom what the older man meant. But couldnt deny the excitment in his gut.

Did he mean it? Would he really include clark in this kink? Make it official and let these forbidden threesomes continue?

"Oh dont play coy, i know what your thinking~ its natural to be curious, just think we could all be one~" august whispered movjng his thumb over clarks bottom lip.

"We could all play together and all get what we need." He purred smirking as clark gave all the right signs, eyes wide, pupils blown wide shifting in his seat as he cock rose, curtesy of both his praise and the loud wanton moans from you bringing yourslef to the edge of rapture yet again.

"You get the praise and love of a little brat, and a strict dom, y/n gets a role model, a dom and keeps her life partner" august listed shifting on his feet again reeling clark in with low coos full of promise.

The agent curled his hand, cupping clarks cheek coaxing him closer luring his face closer.

"A-And you?" Clark dared to utter, feeling both excited, anxious and overwhelmed, he wanted nothing but to jump at the chance, but was frightened at the same time.

He would admit he'd been a little jealous of all the praise you'd got from august in both encounters.

Closingnhis eyes imagining it was him! That the older influential man had been calljng him a good boy, had been teling him how impressed he was, how proud he was!

Clark was embarrassed and had quickly shook away the desperate thoughts. He wasnt gay, why would he have such thoughts?

He summarised he was just too needy and had gone without. You told him how brilliant and big he was, how sexy and strong and fantastic he is in the bedroom but... with august it was different.

The older male praised down at him! Cooing and fussing at him in a different way. Treated him like a sub and clark liked it. Probably too mucn.

"I get the little brat i've been missing and a very very good boy"

"So what do you say, do you want to let go? Be free and experience things you'd only dreamt of?" August preened keeping clarks attention fixed on him asmhe manipulated him, august had noticed clark had a praise kink.

A weakness. A need who was august to pass up useing the little kink to get the subby he wanted~

"I...I'm..." clark hesitated looking passed august to you on the screen who was digging around beside your bed looking for something.

"All you have to do is say the words clark, just say yes sir and you can have all the pleasure and praise you could ever hope for~ both you and y/n we could make this permanent"

"See look? Just watch, y/n needs her dom, needs to be tamed again we could do it clark... you can show her how to be good again~" august breathed over clarks cheek side steppjng him to reveal the screen.

And clark did look, groaning as he saw that you had rolled over and was straddling a different suction cup dildo stuck to a little hand mirror face up on the bed slapping your own ass as you bounced frantically.

"Just say those words and we can help her together" august hummed into his ear like the devil on his shoulder, tempting him

Clark gasped feeling augusts breath on his neck, his wisters ghosting the delicat skin.

Then in a bold move the older man pressed a soft feather light kiss to the kryptonian's neck.

And it worked

"I... y-yes, can we? Please sir" clark breathed out stuttering and jumbling his words unable to hold back his pleading.

"Good boy clark~ such a good seet boy you are~ i knew it, knew youd be brave enough, you've made me soo proud" august showered him with praise biting off a victorious grin.

Clark mewled closingnhis eyes for a second beaming a smile feeling this strange relaxation take over, suddenly he felt free, and small.

It was a feeling he craved, being the strongest all the time was a heavy burden to bare, now he could feel powerless for once.

August chuckled and pressed another kiss to clark this time on his cheek making the younger male's cheeks glow.

August couldnt get enough, the power trip of having the man of steel under his command was far to intoxicating.

"Now why dont you go get our little brat and we can tie her up and show her that good subby's get rewards" august prompted him stepping around clark completely letti g himstand up.

Clark nodded and shot off out onto the balcony and leapt into the sky eagwr to please his new dom and do as he was told.

August took his seat agin wrappjng his fingers around his glass of scotch and raised the glass to the screen that now had both his subs onscreen, as clark wrangled you into his arms wrapping the bedsheet arohnd you.

"Mission accomplished" he hummed smirking as clark wrapped you in your soiled bedsheet before you both disappeared off screen.

He stood and knocked back the last of his drink and padded across the pent house heading to the play room just as he heard both of hos little subs land and enter his home.

[localvoidcat]

putting them under cut :3 a lot of these have been mentioned before im just putting them all here

any pronouns + tech neos, arospec gay transmasc. he's whatever he wants to be

he's pre-t/no-op. mustache is fake he loves it. maybe he uses a voice changer hes silly like that

in college he used to wear a lot of fun glasses he'd have silly colored shaped ones

speaking of college! i think he thatcher and ruth all went to the same school and i think they were drastically different back then. so many pictures of them as completely different people

her glasses are both prescription and for light i think tech has sensitive eyes. mix of staring at computers constantly and also just because they're just like that

has chronic pain but doesn't acknowledge it and if they do they just. dont care enough to fix it

this is from an offhanded thing said on a stream once but wire has ten cats :] the cat names are the ones ant headcanoned

im an uncle dave truther (mark and sarah's mom is his sister) but i dont actually think he was able to be too present in mark or sarahs lives due to. the next thing im gonna list

dont think his relationship with his family was too good, got disowned later in life (fuck the heathcliff family me and my homies hate the heathcliff family). he stays in touch with sarah when she gets older but he wasnt able to be there for mark during that time. sad!

uhhh i think she gets to be gnc . cause i love her. i drew dave lee in a dress once and it extended my life span

snatching this from moonlightmasquerade but i think they should have sectoral heterochromia. as a treat. he gets to be silly

likes sci-fi movies a lot. i think he'd also like those really shitty movies they love those

wont stop eating wires. bbygirl whats wrong with you

isnt as close to thatcher as ruth was to him but i think tech really tried to be after vol 333. went out of clacks way to try and help thatcher out but theres only so much you can do for someone that wants to shut people out. before all of that though i think they were pretty good friends they did dumb stuff together. probably got arrested together once

i think he and ruth were close too!! ruth canonically called him "poor thing" and i think thats just how she treats click IUHYGTF that's her babygirl #2. dial looks up to her on some level

has a lot of colorful shirts. probably wears the worst hawaiian shirt + khakis combination ever

mullet dave truther. sorry

i think they have a very funny dynamic with evelin where he's just like. the worst possible boss ever but in a whimsical way. shes so tired of putting up with him but they also hang out on the weekends. strangest non-related uncle/niece duo ever

missing a tooth and claims its from a fight he got into years back. in truth he slipped and ate shit on a sidewalk as a kid

had a lot of cats as a kid! kind of ties into the having a bunch of them currently one, i think shes just used to being around them

canonically says he's not a man of god. points at that guy religious trauma be upon ye. questions it when he gets really anxious

has so so many issues that he just doesnt get checked out. dave voice everybody has horrific breakdowns that they bottle up for decades on end i dont know what you're talking about

tries to be very positive, ESPECIALLY after vol 333. i made this a key point in my lovely city but i think that he equates his worth to how much he's able to help people, and sees being able to make people happier as part of that. imagine how crushing it must have been to realize that the thing he was doing to help people all those years was the thing that brought about the downfall of his home and potentially the world. Oh Well!

i need to just make a list of my dave hcs. do you guys just want a list of my dave hcs