#i really just wrote a 1000 word essay huh

[aceaceace144616]

Welcome, Caller

by M Dean Wright

my thoughts in a nutshell: "oh no hes just like me fr"

ok i dont really review books or anything, thats my friend's job (cheeky promo alana_the_bibliophile on instagram) nah yeah but this one was just so good.

firstly, as a neurodiverse bi trans dude i related so hard to Malcom (the main character) with the overloads and insecurities and just everything. i may or may not have to get this entire transcript tattooed upon my person cos it just hits so close to home in places i didnt even realise until the book brought them to my attention.

like the whole thing about Malcolm not going after things that will make him happy (Peter) just cause he feels like hes so fucked up ± messing something up on purpose before you can mess it up by accident vibes. i literally said (in a squidward impression cos that is important information) "oh no hes just like me for real" out loud on a bus (but it was a loud bus so no one heard) (hopefully). also another thing, Peter telling Malcolm about his auDHD and what he likes + dislikes about sensory stuff. and Malcolm believing and respecting him. i just. its such wish fulfilment. that along with the rest of the story, its all just wish fulfilment. having multiple queer and neurodiverse friends that help you when youre struggling and will beat up your unsupportive family members. (also having a dude think youre hot. wouldnt mind)

secondly, it was just a good read. like i really enjoyed reading it, which hasnt happened for a while. it made me smile and laugh in public (which i never do). fr i was having a giggle on the bus, in class, in doctors waiting rooms, everything. i actually looked forward to reading it as well and i had to trudge through other stuff just so i could get back to it.

lowkey gives love simon vibes (from what i remember of the book when i read it in like 2018), just chock full of natural and believable sounding dialogue and references to things im sure ill actually like. (in my notes app on my old phone i went through the book and wrote down all the references made in love simon and it was pretty extensive (and now i have to do this for this book. oh no guess ill have to read it again oh this is so sad whelp better start now see ya)).

and like the friendship between the characters, the dialogue never felt too forced and they talked like actual people id talk to. swearing at and bullying your friends is a love language and it was done pretty well in this, and also the sending of memes being like an important step in a friendship is too real. also the revival of interest in records, my cousins poor bank account is a testament to that being relatable.

thirdly, the story. we got enemies to friends to lovers, we got 'there was only one bed', we got a road trip, we got a sickfic, and so much more and you know that i ate it up every time.

that as well as the epic highs and lows of making friends in your 20s (lol).

the book follows Malcolm slowly becoming friends with this irl dude Peter while falling for this 'mysterious' radio host Rebo, with his friends supporting him the whole time.

like i dont really go for romantic style stories but this was just so good (but then again ive barely read anything since back when i used to inhale books at like age 12) + the chemistry between Malcolm and Peter was just chefs kiss so good man.

also, the name Goby (one of his friends) kinda got me tho ngl, gobby is australian slang for… something, and i got a jump scare whenever they showed up lol.

Edit: they Goby on my Gumby till I Cheese. I'm so fucking sorry I had to write that down I couldn't get to sleep.

the only bad thing about the book (not that its bad bad, just like if i had to pick something) would be that the ending was made out of like 3 epilogues with indeterminable time skips between them. unless i missed something idk. im just more about the 'the characters kept on living' kinda ending, less 'albus serverus potter' style stuff, not that it was even like that tho.

but also wanting to own and run an incredibly specific cafe+store with your partner is just so fucking gay. oh my god. fanfiction shit right there /pos.

lastly, i haven't read heaps of books in the last couple years, preferring movies and shows more than my childhood self who lived in books series, almost like i didnt like reality or something (unthinkable ik)(i literally had this printed out and hung on my wall)(and on me liking movies more, thats a whole nother fucking topic and a half so ill complain about it in another post)(but anyway).

like honestly, i think that i might get back into reading, even though i forgot how many hours just fly by when i read, cos this was just great. (dont tell my mum she'll throw a fucking party)(again, different topic).

also admittedly, i did sotra kinda maybe slightly pirated it and read it off a pdf BUT! cos i like it so much im probably going to buy a physical copy (for almost 40 fucking dollars including shipping Jesus fucking Christ)

ik not a single person but me will see this review but i dont care. this book was made for me about me

tldr:

[adultswim2021]

Ephemera Week (2002)

I really wonder how effectively I’ll be able to do this in 2003. In 2003, Adult Swim started doing the black and white text bumps, where they give max sass and NO EFFS (fucks), so every week had unique content. I definitely don’t have the resources to catalogue every bumper or even come up with a decent “best of”. Ephemera Corner 2003 may look very different. To quote my good friend Zorak, “Brak, do you ever think about the future?”. To this I say, yes. Yes, Zorak, I do.

BROADCAST ANOMALIES AND SPECIAL NIGHTS!

Adult Swim Action (and other stuff) | February 23, 2002

February 23rd was the first installment of Adult Swim Action. Up to this point, Adult Swim aired a block of mostly comedy capped off with Cowyboy Bebop. This was the first formal separation of Action and Comedy. I remember the bitter rivalry between the two fandoms on various message boards I posted on. It really did seem like a venn diagram with almost no overlap; action fans hated the comedy shows (maybe they liked one or two but hated the rest) and the same went for the comedy fans, except most of the comedy fans I knew were devout anime haters.

At the height of my anime animosity an internet ex-friend of mine started a message board called ANIME SUCKS. It was an experience I’ll always remember fondly. At it’s peak it had over 1000 members. All but about a dozen of those members were actually ANGRY anime fans who just stumbled on the board and were FURIOUS at us for being anti-anime, and we’d just act like obtuse dickheads about it. Like, we’d act stupider than they were and just wind them up.

We developed a few tricks to really set somebody off. For example: they’d write an impassioned defense of anime as an art form, and say something like “it’s not all like Pokemon or Dragonball Z”, to which we’d reply “actually those are the only two animes I like”. This really got them. There was a special thrill to just replying “miyazaki is an idiot” to a guy’s 6-paragraph essay about why anime was “good, actually”, prompting an even longer response. It was really fun! We didn’t have to harass people online, they’d just come to us to get abused. I’ve never seen bait get taken so effortlessly. One day that guy just closed the message board, locked everyone out, and disappeared forever.

That was some aside, huh? Anyway, the arrival of Adult Swim Action meant that Adult Swim stopped airing the Thursday night repeats of Adult Swim Comedy, which was a shame. It Also meant Adult Swim’s Sunday night had an extra hour to fill, which they did with Rocky & Bullwinkle and the Popeye Show. People complained. I didn’t. Vintage animation is just a different take on the “adult” label. Besides, I was used to tuning out by 12AM anyway, so even if I didn’t like those shows (I did!) I wasn’t missing anything, really. But yes, if it were a full hour of Space Ghost repeats I guess that would’ve been better.

The Lewis Lectures | May 19, 2002 - 12:45 AM

A repeat of Lewis Lectures? IT HAPPENED! But what was so different about this broadcast of Lewis Lectures? Well, they accidentally scrambled the SAP audio with the default English audio, causing the Spanish soundtrack to play in tandem with the English one. It was bloody well fucked mate. This is simply no longer England.

I remember becoming an Adult Swim completist and taping this, considering it some kind of void in my collection. Part of me wishes I saved the recording, so I could combine it with the inferior YouTube rip currently up and have a closer-to-pristine copy than the one that’s available. But also, JESUS FUCKING CHRIST THIS IS LEWIS LECTURES WE ARE TALKING ABOUT. How much pain can I inflict on myself?

Harvey Birdman: Attorney at Law Mini-Marathon | September 15, 2002 - 11:00 PM

On this night they aired a little Harvey Birdman marathon of the 4 episodes. This was kinda baffling, as Birdman had 6 episodes to its name and they’d been repeated into the ground by this point. I guess it goes to show that Adult Swim kinda considered Birdman to be their prestige program. I’m hard-pressed to call any one Adult Swim show “smart” in a way that’s apparent on a shallow level. Birdman is set in a courtroom, animated the most competently out of all their other shows, and involved cultural references in a showy way. Like, Space Ghost having Dave Willis absurdly shout “UP THE CHAIN” in the background of a Space Ghost episode is almost just a weird easter egg. But Birdman? Birdman was name-dropping Hanna Barbera characters the same way Frasier would talk about whatever gay shit Frasier talked about.

They aired The Dabba Don, Shaggy Busted, Shoyu Weenie, Very Personal Injury in that order. I would’ve swapped Shaggy and Shoyu and for Bannon Custody Battle and Death by Chocolate, but that’s just me, I guess.

Adult Swim New Years Bash hosted by Carl and Brak | December 31, 2002 - 11:00 PM

Adult Swim officially ended 2002 with this: a night hosted by Carl and Brak in Times Square, watching the ball drop (which was FREAKING MEATWAD!!!!). I remember this night fondly. Unfortunately I can’t find the whole thing, but here’s a single segment I found on vimeo to give you some idea. I think I had it up at one point and Turner very annoyingly had it taken down.

I used to have this massive physical media collection; stuff on VHS and DVD and DVD-R that was meticulously catalogued. I ditched a lot of it in favor of digitizing stuff like this, eternally keeping it on hard drives that I meant to back up but never did. It seems more convenient, but it isn’t. If this were 2003 and I needed to show you this, I would be able to retrieve it from one of my many shelves. I might still have this, but would have no idea where to look for it and it would probably involve me getting in my car and going out to my storage unit and pulling every single box out. I turned it into ones an zeros and stuck it on a nondescript black box that could very well be dead. And now it’s not even on YouTube. Sad? Sure, it’s sad.

PEAK EPHEMERA

(phrase stolen from Grifthorse podcast)

Hey, here are some videos I found on YouTube in case you wanna go down a wormhole of watching old Adult Swim commercial breaks. May the gods of posterity keep them online forever:

February 4, 2002

Spring 2002

June 16, 2002

June 30, 2002

July 27, 2002

August 2002

November 17, 2002

November/December 2002

MAIL BAG:

This ends EPHEMERA WEEK. We’ll do actual episodes soon!

What's the scariest thing you seen on adult swim?

I don’t know if I have a real answer for this. I don’t think I actually get scared by stuff in movies or TV shows. I can’t even come up with a funny answer. Remember the end of that Metalocalypse episode where the little sick girl is dead and her eyes turn into maggots and you hear that screechy voice was like I’M DEAD BECAUSE OF YOU!!! I’ll just go with that even though it made me laugh really hard

Ever watch Limmy's Show

I am content just being vaguely aware of Limmy (no, I never watched his show. Seems good).

Please don't do such a big mailbag. I couldn't believe how many r-words wrote inane bullshit to you. Let keep this blog about the real stars: Master Shake, Space Ghost, Brak, Zorak, Meatwad, Frylock, Debbie, Black Debbie, Carl, Sparks, Stormy, Hesh, Moltar, Harvery Birdman Captain Murphy, Dr. Quinn, Paula, Marco,  Brendon, Jason, Melissa, The Mooninites, the Plutonians, Peanut, Coach Mc Gurk, Mentok the Mindtaker, Virjay, Antoin, Colby, Trotter, Adair WE ARE THE UPRIGHT CITIZENS BRIGADE :)

I can’t believe this IDIOT doesn’t get that by typing such a long message he very IDIOTICALLY contributed to the length of the Maili Bag... LMFAO, what a IDIOT

This is maybe the funniest blog on tumblr. You really think these nasty little cartoons are special, huh?

Hey than-- oh :( Yeah, I guess so :(

would you like master shake if he did the whole thing

I’m sorry what

[marvelousheroes]

Don’t Tell Steve!

Pairing: Peter Parker x Reader, The Avengers x Reader 

Request: Hey could ypu please write a peter parker imagine where he's dating the reader but in secret because her older brother is Steve? Like they try to hide it but bucky finds out and then everyone and they tease them? Later steve finds out and ... by @kameliasdream

Word count: 1000

A/N: Okay so, I wrote this a loooong time ago but because I had just posted ‘The One Where Everyone Finds out’ I thought that this was too similar to post right after it... And then I kind of forgot about this. So sorry about that. I tried to do this imagine as accurate to the request as possible without making it too similar to the previous which meant that I couldn’t really follow the request 100 %. Again, sorry about that! 

PS: You can send me asks, stupid questions, messages anything! And please do! I’m always in the market for new friends. send your asks here

Masterlist

”Ooh, what do we have here” you heard Bucky say playfully from the door. You froze. You had been dating Peter for a few months now in secret because of your overprotective brother. You slowly parted away from Peter and turned your head towards Bucky.

“Nothing” you said slowly, thinking hard how the hell you could explain this. “We are just hanging out here” you smiled nervously.

“Yeah… Hanging out. Just watching the TV” Peter pointed at the TV realizing that it wasn’t even on.

“Mhm, right” Bucky gave you two a sly smirk and left the room.

“Oh my God, he can’t tell Steve” you turned to Peter in panic.

“Oh, no no no no, Cap is going to hate me if he finds out! And I just got him to like me” Peter started panicking and held his head in his hands.

“Okay, we need to stop Bucky” You jumped up from the couch and took his hand. “Let’s go” you pulled him up and started running. You didn’t have to run that far when you found Bucky talking with Steve. You let go of Peter’s hand and told him to stay so Steve wouldn’t see him.

“Hey Bucky” you faked a cheerful voice when you walked to him and Steve. “Could you help me out with something?” you continued with a fake smile hoping that Steve wouldn’t get curious.

“Oh, what do you need help with” Bucky turned to you with a smirk.

“I have to write a history essay and could really need your help” you replied, the smile getting faker and faker every second.

“I can help you with that” Steve said with a smile.

”Yeah, why can’t Steve help you with it?” Bucky smirked at you.

“Well, Steve, remember the last time you helped me, and we just ended up fighting” you tried to explain.

“Okay, that’s fair” Steve laughed a bit. “I’ll just go hang out with Tony” Steve continued with an annoyed face and walked away.

“Okay Bucky, come on” you grabbed his arm and led him to Peter.

“Bucky please don’t tell Steve about me and Peter” you begged him.

“What? I thought that you two were just hanging out” Bucky said sarcastically.

“Yeah, yeah, just don’t tell him please!” you begged him once more.

“Fine. I won’t tell him, but I can’t promise anything for those guys” Bucky smirked and pointed behind you. You gave Bucky a confused look and looked what he was pointing at. Your eyes grew wide when you noticed Natasha and Clint standing behind you with amused smiles.

“Oh sh—” you muttered to yourself.  “Hey guys, what’s up. How long have you been standing there?” you laughed nervously while sweating like a pig.

“So, you and Spiderling huh” Natasha winked at you.

“You can’t tell Steve okay?” you begged again and wiped a drop of sweat from your forehead.

“Oh, I wasn’t supposed to tell?” Clint looked up from his phone.

“Oh no, what did you do?” you panicked while Peter stood behind you nervously pulling his sleeves. 

“Relax Y/N, I’m just kidding” Clint laughed and walked away.

“I promise I won’t tell Steve” Natasha winked and followed Clint.

At the end of the day it seemed like everyone on the team knew about you and Peter, except for Steve.

“You and Peter are perfect for each other” Wanda said.

“Congratulations for your relationship with Mr. Parker” Vision came up to you.

“Don’t you hurt my Spider-Boy” Tony gave you a stern look.

“Damn those guys” you slammed your door closed and sat next to Peter. “I mean, fair enough, they said that they weren’t going to tell Steve. I guess I should have been more specific,” you leaned your head against Peter’s shoulder. “It’s only a matter of time until Steve finds out” you continued with a sigh.

“W-well, maybe we should just tell him. I mean, it will be worse if he hears it from someone else, right?” Peter said while stroking your hair.

“Maybe you’re right” you lifted your head from his shoulder to face him. “What did I do to deserve you” you smiled at him.

“I’m the one who should be asking you that” Peter laughed making you blush. You smiled at him and grabbed his hand.

“I love you” you told him for the first time.

“I-I love you too Y/N” Peter smiled widely and stoked your cheek with his thumb. He pulled you closer to him and kissed you with so much love.

“Hey Y/N—” You heard Steve’s voice and you froze. You didn’t know what to do, you were so shocked that you didn’t even realize to let go of Peter.

“I—” Steve tried saying but he seemed just as shocked as you were.

“M-m-mr. R-r-ogers…” Peter finally pulled away from you.

“Um, I’m sorry for interrupting you. Just wanted to say that dinner is ready” Steve said still trying to process what he just saw. He didn’t know what to do or what to say so he just stood there quietly for a while.

“Y-yeah, we’ll be right there” you told him awkwardly.

“Okay, so, I’m going to go now” Steve pointed at the door and started walking away. As he was just about to close the door behind him he peeked his head out the door one more time. “Just, you know, be safe” he said awkwardly and closed the door.

“Well… That went better than I thought it would” Peter laughed.

“Yeah, that dinner is going to be the fun” you said sarcastically. You took a breath and stood up. “Are you ready?” you asked Peter and held your hand for him to take.

“Yeah” Peter sighed and grabbed your hand. 

You spent the whole dinner ignoring everyone’s teasing about your relationship and trying to change the subject. On the upside: all the teasing seemed to loosen up Steve a bit and make him more comfortable about your new relationship.

Tags: If you want to be tagged in my imagines, send me a message here and tell me what kind of posts you want to be tagged in (which characters).

@every-heart-has-scars,  @valerinaalove, @germolig02, @eponine-xx, @pillow223, @sadlittlestick, @lifelillysandmagicwands, @superwholockian5ever, @disteenager, @bonza-bear, @chelykat451-blog, @deanwinchesterisnotonfire, @tomholllaand, @kampfzwergwiesel, @mychemicaltessa, @wizardinthewrongplace,  @thejemersoninferno, @multi-parker,  @aplus-trash, @superwholockianowl, @kocktober

[nastytrashblog]

Stigma (Wings Fanfic)

A/N: I wrote this for 7 hours straight, I wanted to finish this before the weekend, but I woke up late and corrected it just now. This is the longest fanfic out of all so far. It’s 6,254 words, I struggle with a 1000 word essay, but I can make this? Anyways, I hope you enjoy!

Fluff, bit of angst, suggestions of smut, high school au, V x Reader

Tae, are you okay?” You saw him in the corner of his room and walked towards him.

“No, I’m a monster.” He cries and shoves his face in between his knees.

3 years ago

“Class this is (y/n).” You just moved schools. You were in grade 11 and moving was harder now than it was before in grade 2, or 6, or grades 7 and 8. Your mom basically moved around the whole country for work. Okay that may be an exaggeration, but anywhere she had to move, you went with her. Your dad was a housewife, or a househusband if that’s even a word. He did work at home fixing computers and taking out the viruses. It wasn’t really an “under the table” job. Okay maybe it was, but he does get good pay. He receives a lot from his customers, and it helps keep the family going. You were an only child, but if you had a sibling, it would make the situation a lot harder. You didn’t keep any close friends because you moved around a lot. You were kind of lonely. However, your mom said for sure, that you are not moving anymore.

Everyone had their eyes on you. You felt nervous, but at the same time excited.

“(Y/n) you can go sit at the back seat there in the corner.” You nodded and went to the back. Your seat was right by the window. You looked out at the sky like it was some kind of scene in a movie or those shoujo animes. “It would be so weird if a guy came up to me just-” you were in the middle of your thoughts when you felt a tap on your shoulder. You turn around to a brown haired boy in a grey hoody and black pants.

“Do you have a pencil?” “Is this dude serious? He came to school without a pencil.” You looked on his desk, there was nothing but a textbook. You sigh and look in your bag for your pencil case.

“Need paper too?” You ask. You might as well offer it now before he bothers you later. He nodded and you took out 4 pieces of lined paper and a pencil. You handed it to him and didn’t even thank you. “What’s the deal with him?” In a blink of an eye, your class was done. You took out your timetable to see what class you had next. “Ugh, I have math.” Just then, someone picked up your timetable in a swift motion before you could even react.

“Hey! That’s mi-” You look beside you to see the same guy that took your pencil and didn’t even say thanks.

“You have every class with me, weird. Except for… law? You take law?” He looked up at you confused and raised up his eyebrow. You immediately take the paper out of his hand and shove that and the rest of your stuff in your bag.

“Yeah, is there something wrong with that?” You say without making any eye contact.

“Nope, nothing at all.” You get up swinging your bag across your shoulder and he does as well. You walk out the door and he trailed behind. You turned around and looked at him. You didn’t realize it until now, but he was exceptionally tall.

“Why are you following me?” He laughed and looked at you.

“I’m not following you. We have the same classes, but it seems that you need my help because math, it’s that way.” He pointed his thumb behind him. You stomp down the hall in the direction he said to go as he walked behind you. You finally reached math class and looked for an empty spot. You sat down at the back of the class and the guy sat in the desk beside you. You took out your sketchbook and pencil and drew. You try to ignore him, but 3 boys sat around him and started to talk.

“Sup man? Did you do the homework?” One asked.

“Nah, but I know Namjoon would’ve. I planned to copy off of him.” He laughs. One dude hit him in the arm, you guessed he was Namjoon.

“You have to do your own work, I won’t be saving you ass all the time.” Namjoon opened his bag and gave him a copy of the homework. He took it and thanked him. “Huh, I guess he knows how to say thank you, but he didn’t bother to say thanks to me.” He took out your pencil and started to copy it down.

“I didn’t know you preferred pink pencils.” The one in front of him said.

“It’s not mine, it’s hers.” He pointed at you with his pencil. You turn to them and all their eyes looked at you while he was busy writing.

“Oh, new friend Tae?” Namjoon said. “Tae? That’s his name?”

“I’m Jimin. That’s Jungkook, and that nerd is Namjoon.” The one in front of Tae pointed out. You didn’t know how to react. You feel frustrated for some reason. “Why is this Tae guy getting me in these situations? I’m awkward af, how do I respond to this? Just act cool. No be yourself, always be yourself.”

“Umm, hi-i.” Your voice cracks. “I cannot believe that just happened!” You clear your throat and try again.

“I’m (y/n).” You give them a faint smile and look back down on your sketchbook and continued to sketch.

“Whatcha sketchin there?” Jungkook gets up from his desk and stands behind you.

“Just doodling.” “Why am I being nice to him? Well, I guess he didn’t do anything, yet at least.” Jimin and Namjoon get up as well and crowd around your desk. Tae stayed seated trying to finish copying before the class starts.

“That’s pretty cool! What is it?” Jimin asked.

“It looks like a man with snakes as legs holding a whip in one hand and a ball in another with branches around it.” Namjoon explained. (A/N: this is the symbol that was on the garage door that Taehyung was vandalizing in his teaser. In Jin’s awake teaser, it is the wallpaper in the hallway so that’s how I know. Okay back to the story.)

“I don’t know. Wherever my hand moves, that what I draw. I don’t really think about it, I just get carried away.” You respond still looking down and shading in the figure.

“Here you go Namjoon, I’m done.” Tae said hitting his hand on his arm while holding the papers. Namjoon’s attention went from you to him and took the papers back. The teacher walked in telling everyone to get to their seats. You put away your sketchbook and took out grid paper. He then did attendance. “Jungkook.” “Here.” “Namjoon.” “Here.” “Taehyung.” “Here.” “Taehyung? I guess Tae is his nickname.” “Jimin.” “Here.” he went down the list and asked if he missed anyone. You raised up your hand and asked for your timetable.

“I see, you just moved here. And your name is?” He asked.

“(Y/f/n and l/n).” He wrote down your name at the bottom of his list and smiled at you.

“Well (y/n), welcome to my class. I’m Mr. Kim if you don’t already know. I guess we should start now, you may go back to your seat.” You went back and opened to page 10 as instructed and listened to the teacher. However, you saw in the corner of your eye Tae looking at you. You turned your head to him and he turned his away. You stared at him until he looked back. You pointed to the front of the board and he gave you a mocking face. You gave him one back and he sneered, and faced the board. You let out a smile and pay attention for the rest of the class.

Lunch eventually came and Tae invited you to sit with him and his friends. You agreed because it was either that, or sitting in the washroom stall. Both of you got your lunches and he guided you to a table filled with boys, some that you already recognized.

“Hey guys, this is (y/n). You already know Namjoon, Jimin and Jungkook. That’s Hoseok, Yoongi, Jin and Mark.” He sat down beside Jimin and you sat across from him beside Mark.

“So how do you know Tae?” Hoseok asked.

“He’s in every single one of my classes.” You respond.

“Except law.” Tae added with his mouth full of his sandwich.

“Aww, I’m sorry. That must suck.” Yoongi said. They all laugh and you let out a little smile.

“You have a really nice smile (y/n).” Mark said looking at you.

“Ouuu! Does Mark like the new girl?” Jin teased.

“Wha- no!” He turned towards you “Not that there’s anything wrong with you.” he then turned towards Jin, “Why can’t a guy compliment a girl without having the assumption that they like her?”

“Because she’s ugly. Nothing to compliment unless you’re interested.” Tae said while taking another bite. You kicked him from under the table and yelled “ow” with his cheeks still full. You and the whole table laughed. You turned to Mark who was looking at you. “He’s not that bad looking. He has a nice smile, nice eyes, and ouu, those piercings, nice! Wait, what am I doing? I just met him, snap out of it!” You had fun meeting all of Tae’s friends. You exchanged numbers and became friends almost instantaneously. The next thing you knew, lunch was over and it was back to class. You were throwing out your garbage and Mark walked beside you.

“You have science next right?” You turned and faced the almost 6 ft man.

“Yeah, you have it too?” He smiled at you and simply nodded.

“Shall we walk together?” He asked.

“Yeah, I just need to get something from my locker.” He was okay with it and both of you walked together. You reached your locker and switched out your books. You took your science notebook out and put your math and English notebook inside. You look at your mirror and saw Mark staring and smiling at you. You closed your locker and looked at him.

“You seem to be happy.” You said. He scoffed and both of you started to walk to the science department.

“Yeah? Maybe it’s because I was introduced to you.” You felt your cheeks turning red. “Oh no, what’s happening to me? This actually can’t be happening. Do I like Mark?” You slap your cheek and surprised him.

“Are you okay? You slapped yourself pretty hard.” He stopped in front of you and leaned down to look at your face. You stood in shock and covered your face with your hands. He chuckled and moved your hands away from your face.

“Don’t cover that beautiful face of yours.” He smiles. “WHY IS HE COMPLIMENTING ME SO MUCH?! I CAN’T HANDLE IT!” Someone then bumped in between both of you removing his hands away from yours. You looked to your left and saw Taehyung.

“Flirting with her already? Hurry up and get to class, don’t block the halls.” Tae walked into class. You and Mark followed. All three of you sat at the same bench with you beside Tae and Mark in front of you. Class started right away, but you were distracted the whole time. Mark was staring at you and you told him to pay attention many times, it didn’t work. Class was over and all of you went to art. You entered the room saw a table with all of Tae’s friends. “I guess I have class with all of them, should be fun.” Tae rushed to the table and sat. He started to hug Jin.

“Jin, I was third wheeling all of period three!” He said in a baby voice. They all looked at you and Mark.

“You weren’t third wheeling.” You said.

“Yes I was!” He said once more in a baby voice and pretended to cry. Jin shook him off of his arm and you sat down next to Jimin with Mark following you.

“I thought you said you didn’t like her Mark.” Yoongi said looking from you to him.

“I don’t.” He said bluntly. It somehow felt like a spear going through your heart hearing him say that. The lights were turned off and the curtains were closed. A single flashlight in the front turned on and you jumped in your chair.

“Shadows, they’re everywhere!” The next hour and 15 minutes were all fun and games, literally. You had competitions figuring out what the figure is with just its shadow. You got closer to the guys, but most importantly, Mark. You talked the whole time and at one point he put his arm around you.

The day went by fast, but luckily it didn’t stop there for you. You got closer to Taehyung and talked about a lot. He asked about your past and both of you exchanged information, basically playing 21 questions. However, you got closer to Mark as well. It was awkward at first, it seemed so easy to talk to Tae, but you didn’t know how to start a conversation with Mark. You asked Tae for help. He felt weird at first, but then helped you anyways because of your constant pestering. This was usually how your day went. You talked and got closer with Tae during class, got closer to the other during lunch, talked to Tae after school and asked for help for Mark.

One night, you decided to ask Tae to help set both of you up.

“Hey Tae, can you help me again.”

“Ugh, every single day you ask, shouldn’t you know what to do by now?”

“No, not how to talk to him, but kind of, to help me date him?????”

“What? No! I’m not setting you up with my friend.”

“Why not? You’re already helping me to talk to him!”

“As a friend, but not as a girlfriend.”

“Pleaaaaaaaaase!”

“No!”

“PLEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSS!”

“NO! NO MEANS NO!”

You started to call him in the middle of the night and he gave in. You thanked him a billion times and he made it happen. It was obvious to everyone, except you, that Mark liked you, so it was easy for Tae.

“Yo Mark!” Tae yelled across the halls and ran to him.

“What’s up?” He turned around and faced Tae.

“You should ask (y/n) out.” He said out of the blue.

“What? We discussed about this. What if she doesn’t like me?” Tae took a deep breath in and out.

“Trust me on this. Oh and when you ask her out, don’t make it big. Buy her flowers, white tulips are her favorite, she thinks roses are overrated, and… Oh! Buy her a teddy bear. Kay thanks bud, see you at lunch.” Tae then ran off to math leaving Mark with what he told him.

When 2nd period ended, you went to your locker before going to the cafeteria. You opened it and saw a note fall.

Come meet me at the garden at lunch, I need to tell you something. ~ Mark

You didn’t know what to do. “Did Tae tell him already? This is too soon!” You looked in the mirror and fixed your hair. You powdered your nose and closed your locker. You went outside and met him there.

“Mark?” You approached him. He turned around holding a bouquet of white tulips. He walked up to you and gave them to you.

“Umm, (y/n), I wanted to tell you something, well I’ve been wanting to ask this for a while actually, but umm…” He stuttered. You found it funny yet cute and let out a giggle. He smiled and took a deep breath.

“(Y/n), will you be my girlfriend?” He got the words out of his mouth. You walked up to him and hugged him. You heard his heart beating faster and faster.

You looked up at him, “I thought you would never ask.” He picked you up and spun you around. You suddenly heard clapping and he put you down. Both of you looked and saw the guys cheering.

“And you said you didn’t like her.” Jungkook laughed.

You dated for the rest of your high school years, and went to prom together.

3 years later

All was good, until university came along. He wanted more, he wanted all of you. You weren’t ready. He was understanding at first, but then he started to get aggravated. He thought that you loved someone else and would hurt you in so many ways. He would make fun of you, call you names, and when he was drunk, he would hit you. You wanted to leave him, but you didn’t know if you still loved him or not. You wanted to make sure before you left him, otherwise, you would regret it. You were still in contact with the others, but didn’t as much. They were busy with their own girlfriends, and some, fiancees, except for Tae. He was there for you, but you never told him what was happening. You had a free week by yourself as Mark had a vacation to Cuba with his family. He couldn’t contact you because a) He didn’t have a worldwide plan so he couldn’t text you, and b) The internet was slow in the lobby. You asked Tae if he was available that week, but you already knew the answer.

“Yo Tae, you awake?”

“Yeah (y/n), what’s up?”

“You down to go out tomorrow?”

“What for?”

“Nothing, I’m just going to be bored for the next 7 days.”

“So I’m just a backup?”

“No, don’t be so dramatic.”

“Yeah yeah, okay. Where are we going?”

“Is there anywhere you want to go?”

“Anywhere but my house.”

“Wow, very helpful.”

“Okay fine. Amusement park? I wanted to try that new ride.”

“Amusement park it is. I’ll be at your house at 8:00 am.”

“WHY THAT EARLY?! IT’S LIKE 2:00 AM RN! I CAN’T FUNCTION WITH LESS THAN 6 HOURS OF SLEEP!”

“Then you better get off your phone now, good night tae.”

“GRRRRRR U FRUSTRATE ME!”

“Ha, you love me.”

“NO! BYE I NEED SLEEP!”

You didn’t sleep much that night, you were excited for some reason. “Maybe its because I haven’t seen my best friend in forever. Yeah, that’s it.” You stared at the ceiling all night, planning what to do, and which rides to go on first. “It’s going to be a fun day.”

You opened your eyes and hear you alarm blaring in your ears. You got up and got ready. You put on a white shirt, black pants and brought a flannel just in case it gets cold. You wrapped it around your waist and looked in the mirror. “Wow, I look so basic.” You thought. You didn’t really care at this point. You went downstairs and drank milk and ate a cookie. You figured that you’re probably going to wake up Tae when you get there, so you’re going to treat him to a big breakfast. You grab your keys and run out the door excitedly. You jump into your car and call Tae. Of course, he doesn’t answer, so you drive to his house. Once you arrived, you skipped to his front door and rang the doorbell, no answer. You rang again, no answer. You opened his mailbox and looked for the secret compartment that he installed. You opened it and got the spare key. You opened the door quietly and got a glass full of cold water. You crept up the stairs and opened his door. You walked slowly to his bed and poured the water on him.

“GOOD MORNING SLEEPY HEAD!” You yelled at the top of your lungs. He got up and shook his head like a wet dog. He opened his eyes and looked at you with anger. You take that as a sign to run and you did. You ran down the stairs and you heard Tae chasing after you. You luckily got out the door before he could catch you. He always sleeps shirtless wearing nothing but his boxers, so you know he won’t be coming out.

“Get ready, if you’re not out in 5 minutes, I’m not buying you breakfast!” You yelled out. You opened your phone and started your stopwatch. You sat on the bench on his front porch. You heard running down the stairs and him panicking trying to get his shoes on. He got out at exactly 4:58:97.

“Wow, you almost didn’t make it!” You got up and laughed. He had a towel on his head and wore almost the same thing you did. A white t-shirt, a green jacket, black slacks, and timberlands. He looked at himself, then looked up and down at you.

“Oh come on!” He yelled still drying his hair. He tried to go back in, but you pull him out.

“Oh no, you’re going like this if you want to or not.” You grabbed his hand dragged him into your car as he whined. You got into the driver’s seat and turned to him.

“Okay, maybe lose the flannel, I don’t want people to think we’re a couple.” You put the keys in and started to reverse,

“Why? I thought you loved me.” He teased.

“As if!” You scoff. He laughed and was still drying his hair.

“Speaking of love, how are you and Mark?” You didn’t want to talk about it right now. Although he is your best friend, you didn’t want to tell him, not yet anyways.

“It’s fine. So where do you want to eat?” You changed the topic.

“Ouu, I really want to go to caffe Demetre.” He said happily.

“You crazy? You know how expensive that is?” It was at a red light and you looked at him. He did his pouty face which always disgusted you.

“Pwease?” The light turned green and you started to drive again.

“No, you’re getting Mcdonalds.”

“YA! YOU WOKE ME UP THIS EARLY, MADE MY HAIR AND BED WET, AND RUSHED ME TO GET READY! I DESERVE ME SOME DEMETRES!” He yells in your car.

“Okay fine! You have a point.” he smiled and you turned left on your way to demetres. He ordered a lot and the total came out to $80. You barely ate anything except for a part of his waffle.

“Let’s go Tae.” he was standing at the ordering area for take out. He got a plastic bag and walked towards you. “Oh come on, you just ate a billion crepes, and now you’re getting another?!” You say annoyed.

“This isn’t for me, it’s for you. Eat it in the car.” He walked out the door. “Well, that was sweet of him.” You trailed behind and entered the car.

“So, how am I supposed to eat this while driving?” You asked.

“I’ll feed you.” He suggested.

“Oh no, I don’t trust you. I’ll eat it now!” You try to take the crepe, but he moved it away from your reach.

“Wow, the years that we have been friends and you don’t trust me to feed you? I’m hurt.” He said sarcastically. “Just drive us there, you can trust me.” You accepted it and started to drive. You regret doing that because he teased you. Whenever the fork was under your mouth and you opened it, he would pull it away. Luckily, you finished it before you arrived at the amusement park.

You arrived at the ticket booth at 10:00 am and get your ticket to enter. When you stepped onto the park grounds, you took Tae’s hand and started to run to the rollercoaster. The line was already long and both of you waited there for an hour. You had a good talk and caught up with each other’s lives. Throughout the whole day, you would have competitions on who could keep a straight face, or who could eat the most hot dogs in a minute. When you were taking a break, you decided to verse each other at the carnival games. The ring toss was up first. You missed all except for one.

“I swear this is rigged!” You say throwing your hands up.

“Watch me get this, first try.” He threw every single ring and got 3 out of the 5, which meant he won a prize. He chose the giant teddy bear and a little red bow on it. He hugged it like a little child.

“Lucky! I wanted that one.” You said mad crossing your arms. He was extending the bear out to you, tell you to take it.

“No, it’s okay, I was kidding.” He shoved it in your arms and you held it.

“I got it for you, you think I want this?” You took it with a big smile on your face.

“You’re such a cute couple.” The man working at the game said.

“Oh no, we’re not dating.” You explained.

“Sorry, it just seemed like it. You look good together.” He walked away and assisted the next customer. The day went by faster than you thought. After all the competitions, it was a tie, but both of you still had a blast. It was nearing 11:00 pm, the closing time, and you walked through the gates.

“So what do you want to do tomorrow?” Tae asked.

“Maybe the movies. It will be cheaper.” You suggested. He agreed with it. Once you reached the car, you shoved the giant teddy bear in the back seat and put a seat belt on it. You sat in the driver’s seat and put on yours.

“Is that really necessary?” He looked from the back seat to you.

“Yes, Bubsy needs to be safe during this drive.” You say like a child.

“Bubsy? You already gave it a name?” He questioned.

“Yeah, got a problem?” You said. He shook his head and you drove Tae home. You arrive at his house and he turned to you.

“Don’t tell me you’re going to wake me up tomorrow like you did today.” He sighed.

“No, I didn’t get sleep last night. So whoever wakes up first will come over and wake the other one up. Deal?” Both of you shook on it.

“Wait, why did you not get-” You interrupt him by pushing out in the car.

“Byeeeeeee.” and you drive off. You arrived home and took Bubsy out of the car. You ran upstairs and placed Bubsy on your bed and took a bath. “Ahh, today was fun. This is going to be a really fun week.”

The next few days with Tae were just as fun as the first. You shared laughs, memories, it was like the old times in high school, before you started dating Mark. Eventually, Saturday came, the last free day that you know you’re going to have with Tae. You decided to stay at your house and order pizza. You had a lot of deep conversations about your futures. Eventually, Mark was brought up.

“So, you haven’t been talking about Mark lately. Anything the matter?” he asked and took another bite of his pizza. “Should I tell him? Maybe I should. It’s been going on for a few months now. He is my best friends.”

“I-um- I actually have something to tell you.” He sat up and put his pizza down. “So lately, Mark has been, frustrated, sexually frustrated. I told him I didn’t want to yet, but he keeps pushing.” His face scrunched up and thinking that that’s complete BS. “And that’s not all. Now, when I tell you this, please don’t freak out.” He nods and crossed his heart. “Well, he would kind of yell at me and hurt me emotionally… and physically.” He got up due to his anger.

“WHAT?!” His face turned red with anger.

“But that’s only when he’s drunk!” Taehyung paced back and forth.

“You have to break up with him!” You get up and face him.

“What?! No!”

“Why not?”

“It’s because- you said you wouldn’t freak out.”

“But knowing that you, someone I love, is getting hurt by a douchebag like him, of course I’ll freak out!” Tae was getting really angry you didn’t know what to do.

“I know you love me Tae but reall-” he stopped you by grabbing the side of your arms.

“No you don’t. I don’t love you the way you love me. You love me as a friend, I love you more than that. Ever since I saw you, I thought you were so pretty. You made my heart beat faster than anyone! Even just by looking at you, you make me crazy, and I can’t take it! I tried to get over you, but the past few days made me love you even more.” You were surprised at what he just said. You never thought that he felt that way.

“I didn’t mean for that to happen Tae, I’m so sorry.”

“Why did you do that to me then? Why did you become friends with me?”

“I’m sorry!” You yell. Tears are welling up in your eyes. You never had a fight with Tae before.

“Forget it, what right do I have to tell you what to do.” He grabbed his jacket and walked towards the door.

“Kiss me!” You yell out to him.

“What?” He turns around.

“I said kiss me. Please, kiss me. I want you!” You say walking towards him. He drops his jacket and pushes you to the wall. He places his lips on yours gently and then deepened the kiss. You flung your arms around him and a tear rolled down your cheek. He snaked his arms around your waist and pulled you closer. You melted in his arms. You jumped up and put your legs around his waist. He walked up the stairs and placed you with care on the bed. He was on top of you and you played with his hair. “What am I doing? I’m making out with my best friend, but it feels so right.” You started to take control and pushed him onto the bed without breaking the kiss. You started to unbutton his shirt, but he pushed you away. You got off of him and he stood up from the bed.

“You should sleep now, I’ll clean up downstairs.” He walked out, cleaned up the empty box of pizza. He put on his jacket and shoes, and closed the door behind him. The whole time you were sitting in bed, contemplating on what just happened. You made out with your best friend, he took you to bed and you didn’t think twice about the possibility of you having sex with him. With Mark, if you even got close to what you and Tae were doing right now, you would push him off. When Tae did it, you didn’t mind. “Do I still love Mark? Or am I with him just as a habit?” You laid in bed cuddling Bubsy, replaying the moments of today. “But knowing that you, someone I love, is getting hurt…” “You love me as a friend, I love you more than that.” “Kiss me.” You hugged Bubsy tighter getting a whiff of his cologne.

You woke up the next morning to the door opening.

“I’m home baby.” You hear a familiar voice yell. You run to the bathroom to clean yourself up from the aftermath of you crying all night. Luckily, you wore your pajamas, which was just technically short shorts and a white tee, when Tae came over. You walk out of the bathroom and ran downstairs and jumped into Mark’s arms.

“Hi baby!” You kissed him.

“Ahh, I miss your smile.” he kissed you again and put you down.

“I’ll make you breakfast babe.”

“Now that will be great.” he smiles and kisses you again, but on the forehead. He sat on the couch and turned on the TV. You took out the eggs and bacon. You started to cook the rice first and made a cup of coffee for Mark.

“Thanks hun.” He sipped and went back to watching TV. You continued to cook and finished making everything.

“I’m done, let’s eat.” You set the plates on the table. He looked over your shoulder and looked at the food.

“Ouu yum, I can’t wait. Let me use the bathroom first.” He went upstairs and you go back to the kitchen to clean. After a few minutes, you heard him walk down the stairs. You turn around and see him mad stomping towards you. He slapped you across the cheek and clenched his teeth.

“You were fooling around with someone here weren’t you? I can smell his cologne in the house, in the bedroom, on that teddy bear, and… on you.” He said silently, but deadly. He placed his hand around your neck. “No no no, not again!” Then you heard the house door slam open. It was Tae.

“Get your hands off of her!” Tae yelled. He was carrying something in his hand, but was hiding it.

“Tae? What are you doing he-” Tae grabbed him by the collar and shoved something in his stomach. You looked down and saw it was a broken glass bottle. He stabbed him many times. You couldn’t move, you couldn’t speak. You’re watching someone you love, or you think you love, get murdered in front of you by someone else that you might have feelings for. You got the courage to move and run to Tae.

“Tae stop!” Mark fell once Tae let go of him. His hand was covered in his blood. He immediately had a face of instant regret. Tae ran out the door with the glass bottle still in his clutch and drove off before you could say anything. You called 911 to try to get Mark to the hospital. When the ambulance came, he was announced dead. They took his body away and you had to leave. You drove to Tae’s house and entered, it was unlocked. You walked to his bedroom and saw him in the corner.

“Tae, are you okay?” You walked towards him.

“No, I’m a monster.” He cries and shoves his face in between his knees.

“No you’re not!” You said putting your hand on his shoulder. He shook it off.

“Yes I am. Look!” He showed his hands that had blood on them. “This is how a monster looks like. I killed Mark, one of my best friends.” You heard two people calling for Tae’s name. They ran up the stairs and saw him. It was his brother and sister.

“Tae, are you okay? Once I got your text I drove here with your brother.” She said drying his eyes. “It’s going to be okay.”

“Okay? Sis, he just murdered someone.” her brother pointed out.

“Thank you captain obvious, but right now we need him to calm down, we need him to talk. (Y/n) can you get me a wet towel please?” You got up and got a hand towel from the cabinet and wet it. You also got a glass of water to bring to him. You head back to Tae and his sister. You wipe Tae’s hand to get the blood off. Her sister gave him the water and he stopped crying.

“Okay, now that he’s better, I think we need to discuss on what to do. I think Tae needs to turn himself in. It’ll get worse if we keep him in hiding.” Tae’s sister turns towards him looking at him like he’s crazy.

“I AM NOT PUTTING MY BROTHER IN JAIL!” She yells. “There has to be another way to fix this! What kind of a brother are you?” She looked at him with a disgusted look.

“Why am I the bad one? Are you calling me a sinner? Compared to what he did, I did nothing.” Tae’s sister started to cry knowing that there’s no other way. Tae brought his hand to her face and wiped the falling tear. He looked at her, then her brother. He got up and hugged you.

“I’ll do it, I’ll say I did it.” You pushed him off.

“No! I’m not letting you go to jail! Tae please! I finally realize what I’ve been missing, and that’s you! Please, I don’t want you to go.” Tae puts his hands on your face.

“Don’t worry, I’ll be back.” He kissed you on the forehead and then walked out that door. You tried to run after him, but his sister kept you back. It was like he disappeared into the darkness. It felt like you would never see him again.

4 years later

You heard unlocking of the door. Once it opened, you jumped up from the couch and ran to Tae. He closed the door and held you in a tight embrace.

“Good to see you too (y/n)-” you smash your lips onto his. He was surprised at first, but then kissed you back.

You look up into his eyes, “I had to wait 4 years for that, you know how much pain I was in waiting for you?” You chuckle. You were crying tears of joy from the sight of him.

“I’m sorry. Maybe we can start this whole thing over? This whole friendship?” He asked. You jumped up and wrapped your legs around his waist.

“I think it’s a little too late for that.” You giggle and kiss him again.

“I guess so.” He kisses you back and walked you up the stairs.