#i really don't get it like i have not read all the long post-catws fics but when i pick something from my bookmarks i never get one of those

[autumnrory]

i've been reading fic like nonstop and since i just finished a good one it feels like time to take a break but i'm like. it wasn't really a fic with plot and i just feel like that's what i've been missing lately or i do find them and i don't like them so it makes me wanna keep going and hope i can find something better

[bromcommie]

For the ask game ;)

🏜️,❄️,🥐,🌻 aaand 🥤

Hope you are having a good day!

Hiya, thanks for the retaliatory hit! (affectionate) hope you're having a lovely day too :) 🏜️ ⇢ what's your favourite type of comment to receive on your work? Ooh, can I just say any? Kidding, albeit I am very grateful for everyone who takes the time out to comment, even if it's just a string of emojis or something! But I am eternally grateful for long, detailed comments and especially love when people point the things that they related to in my work or things that clicked for them (particularly the ones I thought might be overlooked or alternatively, too heavy-handed to land) or even line up certain things or parallels that didn't fully register to me while I was writing except as a vague ~vibe~. I just appreciate it a whole lot, and it makes the whole exchange feel like a conversation. ❄️ ⇢ what's your dream theme/plot for a fic, and who would write it best?

Hm, I don't know - I don't think I have one specific dream theme/plot. That said I have been thinking a lot about Red Room/Department X plotlines recently. I really love the throughline of the struggle for identity + shifting ideologies/definitions of what it means to be a good person + autonomy & free will vs. wanting to belong dichotomy in those stories. Especially when it's grounded in interesting dynamics that aren't very black and white (i.e. Nat and the other widows, the handlers, the WS.) That era is also just very interesting to me in terms of real world circumstances and events, and the scifi potential to explore trauma and psychological fuckery in general is endless. So I guess I'd really love something that deals with Natasha's memories as a child + teen in the war and how that shaped her both before the Red Room even got their hands on her, as well as during and after; how she became this kind of mercurial person who is still (maybe surprisingly so) solid at her core. Something a la Name of the Rose, if you've read that run.

As for who I'd like to write it, I am in fact attempting to write something to that effect into my current post-CATWS wip, so I guess me? Not to say I wouldn't love to read something similar by someone else - there have been several fics out there that dealt with Natasha in a way that had me staring into empty space for an hour (in a good way) - just that I enjoy the process of developing ideas like that in my head differently than I do reading about them from another angle, if that makes sense!

🥐 ⇢ name one internet reference that will always make you laugh 

that vine with the two guys with heavy NY/NJ area accents screaming at a duck. wait no - any patrick william charlton vine where he suddenly acquires a german accent. wait no - the can I PLEASE get a waffle one.

oh man. any one vine really. I'm very nostalgic about vine. 🌻 ⇢ tag someone you appreciate but don't talk to on a regular basis

I feel like if I started doing that I'd end up spamming way too many people haha. I do wanna say I very much appreciate everyone I've gotten to interact with and follow during this CATWS10 event and over the past two months I’ve been on here more!

🥤 ⇢ recommend an author or fanfic you love Oh, god. GOD. This is so tough, I'm really blanking right now. I've been around for a loong while lol and there are so, so many insane, brilliant ones. It doesn't help that I really haven't read that many in the last few years as much as I've been writing them.

Off the top of my head though, I recently went back to Speranza's All the Angels and the Saints. One of the all-time old school Cap greats. All of their stuff is just wonderful, foundational Steve, Bucky & SteveAndBucky content. Also everything by magdaliny. I don't even know what to say there, except maybe goddamn.

I’ve also been reading a couple Red Room fics that I can’t find right now but that were great, so I’ll have to dig through my old laptop bookmarks and get back to you with a personalized list, hehe 🫡

[bikananjarrus]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

finally getting around to this, thank you @astromechs for the tag!!

::

1. How many works do you have on ao3?

29

2. What’s your total ao3 word count?

327,391

3. What fandoms do you write for?

mainly star wars and marvel! though i don't write marvel as much anymore (the mcu really burned me too many times lol and just took away a lot of my inspiration/motivation to write for it). so mostly star wars nowadays, but occasionally i will sprinkle in a fic for a different fandom!

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

a. we find ourselves when we lose everything else - 519 kudos

b. our time in the dark - 518 kudos

c. risk everything we have (and just let our walls cave in) - 426 kudos

d. if loves elastic (then were we born to test it’s reach) - 391 kudos

e. revelations (come to us in recovery) - 388 kudos

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

no 🙈. weirdly enough, i was a lot better about responding years ago on my ff. net account. but i don't really do it on ao3, honestly because i'm just a little lazy about it lol. but i promise i read every single one and know that if you've ever left a comment, i appreciate it so so much!!

6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

probably broken things. it's a romanogers soulmate last words au which ended in a major character death. but you know. last words au, death. it made sense haha.

i've also written a couple canon-compliant character study type fics, including one for natasha romanoff, one for cassian andor/rogue one crew, some for leia organa (post-tfa), and well, none of those end very happily sooooo.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

uhhhhhhh why was this so hard asdffglkhglj. i write a lot of agnst and hurt/comfort lol. but my fic, the weight of your love, is just pure kanera fluff. and these two kanera fics that i've posted on tumblr (but not on ao3 yet), are just silly and fun and fluffy.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

not really, thankfully. i mean, i've gotten some not-so-nice comments in the past (again, mainly on ff.net) but i've never gotten anything super aggressive or confrontational, so i'm grateful to be in nice corners of fandom!

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

occasionally yes. typically i insert my smut scenes into longer fics though. (i do have a bunch of unpublished half-written smut fics that i haven't gotten the courage to finish and post yet, bc i'm not always the most confident in my smut writing but maybe one day!)

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

not really. i'm not even the best at coming up with AUs, much less crossovers lol. i think the closest i've gotten to a crossover is an agents of shield/mcu crossover, which shouldn't even BE a crossover, but considering that the mcu never acknowledged AoS, it kinda feels like it is. anyway, wrote a fic where daisy johnson and bucky barnes are bffs, and i'm quite fond of it!

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

yeah :/ i had somebody take one of my fics and (related to next question) translate it and put it on wattpad. i couldn't message the author and my attempts to contact wattpad got me nowhere so i kinda just let it go.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

looking at last question, technically yes. but other than that, not yet! i would be very honored if someone wanted to translate one of my fics though, and would have absolutely no problem with it! (so long as they asked and didn't steal it asdkfsjd)

13. Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

only bits and pieces of shared aus with friends for fun, but haven’t published anything.

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

kanera and romanogers, hands down. kanan and hera are more recent, but i fell in love with both their characters and them as a couple so fast, and i absolutely love writing for them. they're going to stick with me forever. and steve and natasha.... my loves. fell in love with them when i saw catws the first time and haven't looked back. they've stuck with me the longest, i think. and even though i don't write marvel as much anymore, i still think about them a lot, and there's a lot of stevenat wips i have that i still hope to finish one day.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

whew ummmmm. there's a couple of romanogers fics (specifically finishing our time in the dark and the follow-up to revelations which is an endgame fix-it) that i have told myself i will finish. and i want to! but it will really take a major push to get me back into the headspace to write for marvel again. genuinely, endgame drained so much of the love and inspiration i had so 😔 i hope i can prove myself wrong one day!

i also have ambitions to do a star wars sequels rewrite, but it feels so big lol, so idk if i'll ever actually get around to finishing it. but the bits i have written for it i have so much love for.

16. What are your writing strengths?

digging deep into character emotions and their headspaces. that's something i really like exploring. also i think i'm pretty good about including small details, particularly with using the different senses and using those to help set the scene, and whatnot. in short, description and emotion are my strong suits!

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

humor. i think i can be funny sometimes in my writing, but i definitely don't think i'm as good at humor as other people. and especially funny dialogue and banter, that's something i feel like i have to think about more. so still working on that!

i also don't know if this is a true weakness, but i literally don't know when to stop writing asdfljgldkj. i feel like lately it's so hard for me to write short fics (unless i do it in a mad burst in one sitting). but if i'm thinking a lot about a fic, chances are it's going to be 5k MINIMUM.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

i'm not real comfortable with it, especially if i don't speak the language. if it's a very short phrase or a singular word, i will try to use a translator and other online investigating (and then nicely ask people to correct me in the comments if i'm wrong lol). but if i want to have the character speaking full sentences i will usually type it out in english and then use "they said in [insert language here]" as the tagline.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

if we're going wayyy back, technically the first fic i wrote was a bones fic when i was in middleschool lmao. i wrote it in a notebook, never published it online. but i first posted fics online in high school (as a freshman i think), and i think the first fics i published were for percy jackson and supernatural lol.

20. Favorite fic you’ve ever written?

probably revelations. looking at it now, there are certainly things i would change about this one, but i wrote it on and off for 3 years, so i was just really proud when i finally finished it. and there are still a lot of character moments i wrote into this one that i still love.

also you are my solid ground. plot does not really exist in this fic, but i had the best time writing the steve/nat/sam dynamic. literally dream trio.

(real talk, some of my fave fics are ones that i haven't finished yet/haven't published yet. i think my newest favorite fic is the kanan character study one i'm working on now. i still have a little bit to go, but i'm really close to finishing it, and i'm just so proud of it. there's so much about it that i love and i can't wait to share it (hopefully by the end of the year!)).

::

no pressure tagging: @effie-trinket and anyone else who would like to participate!

[wolfeyedwitch]

My favorite chapter in my favorite fic of yours

Oh. Hmm. Copy and paste hasn't kept the numbers of the questions. Oh well.

I want to say it's Breakfast in Bed part 2 in WBOH, but it could be 3. Or 1, potentially. I refuse to look it up bc I'll start rereading and it's 1am AND I still have things to do. Anyway, it's just after Zera brings breakfast up and Bailey catches them with his powers and has a panic attack. I just... my heart. Bailey thinking he should be punished for using his powers. Can I kill Slipknot yet?

While writing this out though I realised that I should give special mention to the reluctant caretaker and auction of evil parts in the aus. Bc I love them so much too.

A fic I didn’t expect to like so much

The Heart and The Hunger (Hunter? Oh, idk. I read it yesterday and I've forgotten already. You know which one I mean). I love it! I wasn't sure I'd like it that much so it took me ages to get round to reading it, and then I loved it! Actually that reminds me: since I'm here, can I be added to the taglist for it (with @pigeonwhumps)?

A character/ship I didn’t enjoy/think about as much before you wrote about them

A person being used as a weapon in the way Weapon is in Weapons Don't Weep. I mean, I've thought about people being forced to fight but never in the way of like being surgically altered and talking about themself as if they're a piece of machinery and stuff.

You should know that this concept has entered my brain in the way that 'thinking about it more' means 'writing a fic about a living weapon bc I can't not now it's taken over my mind'. It's a long way off being finished and it's definitely very different from your story (I'm not copying anything, dw) but... thanks for the inspiration, I guess? Anyway, I love Weapons Don't Weep.

(ok that's more a character type than a character. But it'll do)

Thank you so much for reading, and for taking the time to comment like this!

Bailey freaking out and Zera comforting them has a special place in my heart, as does working to decondition Bailey out of all the things Slipknot trained into them. And no, you can't kill Slipknot. I have too many plot plans in place that require them being alive, unfortunately.

You are added to the taglist for The Heart and the Hunger! (You got it right the first time lol) I'm glad you enjoyed it, and that you took the time to read it even if you weren't expecting to enjoy it!

I love the idea of someone conditioned into thinking of themself as nothing more than a weapon, a piece of equipment. I think my first time reading that trope was in a Captain America fic focused on Bucky post-CATWS, called "This, You Protect". I believe it's by owlet? It's on Ao3 and it's really good. He starts off using "it" as a pronoun and internally referring to himself as "The Asset", but over the course of the fic gains insight into how to be a person again.

The other main source of inspiration was @secretwhumplair's "Royal Arms" fic, which has a similar setup with a living weapon but is set in a vaguely medieval timeframe. As such, I am 100% not worried or bothered by you getting inspired by my writing. In fact, please tag me in it when you post it! I'd love to see what you come up with!

[hidesquidling]

Answer 30 23 Questions and Tag 20 Some Blogs In Spirit

Name: squidling

Sign: taurus

Height: 5'5'' ish

Birthday: i see u identity thieves… not today!

Time: almost 2pm, i can almost turn my work phone off... i get two hours a day off phones and i feel like a dog waiting for a walk

Favorite band/artists: florence + the machine, fallout boy, uhhhh and mystery skulls, god that was hard, i'm not really a music person

Last movie: Nope; it was excellent, great acting, great animal acting, great stuff to say about animal handling which I did not expect to ever see in any movie let alone a horror, do recommend

Last show: supernatural. It's going to be supernatural for a while tbh cause I'm on s11 and already longing for s1-5 so hard that I'm probably going to start all over again when I'm done

When I created this blog: uhhhh not sure, may? Whenever I started to go too insane over wincest to keep quiet about it

What I post: it's reblog city my friends; mostly gifs and samdean meta, also blood/gore whenever it crosses my dash, and lord knows what it's going to be tomorrow--this thing is NOT curated it's all id all the time.

Last thing I googled: incarcerated uterus. i work in the back office of an obgyn clinic and oh boy do i run across some wild stuff. this one's less horrifying than most of them but still. know yourself before careless googling.

Other blogs: my main runsquidling for things i'm not trying to hide from irl people, and readsquidling for things i need to go back and… you know, read. If I put your rec list or your fic there it's because I'm methodically going through each and every one and appreciating them all.

Do I get asks: no :'( but i'm a serial reblogger i'm not really expecting any

Following: 388 blogs but I'm pretty sure most of them aren't active anymore. I don't really unfollow for anything but you know, not having the same taste anymore (or being were--ralph who i have to periodically unfollow and refollow because sir i love your taste but i am a compulsive tumblr user and cannot stop myself from tumbling in places where i really can't have werewolf dick front and center on my phone)

Average hours of sleep: 5 on weekdays, 12 on weekends. do not recommend. try to not have your circadian rythm set to 3:30am if you can help it, it sucks

Instruments: i sing enthusiastically enough for my local karaoke bar seems to enjoy it!

What I’m wearing: a t-shirt and some pjs i made in a fit of sewing passion that ended in seven pairs of flannel pajama pants and no tops.

Dream job: oh trophy widow for sure, but that involves a whole lot of skills I don't have and a whoooooole lot of luck so it's out of reach T_T

Dream trip: I don't like trips! routine disruption bite bite kill kill. I do like to walk to the library though if that counts.

Nationality: american

Favorite songs: i'm so sorry my looping song right now is e-girls are ruining my life (CORPSE, Savage Ga$p)… it's so… aggressively horny… the uwu… i'm a sucker

Last book I read: oh god it was Acorna's Quest by Anne MacCaffrey after YEARS of casually thinking about wanting to read it again… it was very different from what i remember but you know what? still good. acorna my love <3 unicorn girls and space orphans <3<3 heros with an overactive and foolish sense of justice who also win in the end <3<3<3

3 fiction universes I’d live in: i'm such a baby i couldn't handle any of the fictional universes i like XD So uh… Catwings, Tea Dragon Society, and The Ship Who Sang--the last of which is just The Future And Sometimes Spaceships Are People.

Tagged by @zxroh and now i'm paralyzed trying to interpret tagging etiquette rules. Who am I allowed to tag. I've been thinking about this for seven minutes. Enough. If you're thinking "gosh i wish she'd tagged me" consider yourself tagged.

[autumnrory]

ugh i just caught up with fic in email and read an update and the author just posted another one like obvs it’s nice bc it’s a good story but i need a break i haven’t read anything out of my bookmarks in forever