#i really don’t talk about roxas and xion enough for being my favorites

[goldensunset]

You made me want to draw Xion. How dare

same here bestie

[phoenix-downer]

Spring Birthday

After Sora’s return, Naminé’s friends celebrate her birthday with her. While her early days were lonely, her life is very different now, and she treasures each new memory with the people dear to her heart.

~1650 words. Post-Kingdom Hearts III and Melody of Memory. Gen, Friendship, Fluff. Naminé POV. Written for @naminezine​, and the banner art is by the lovely @somniumars​.

“Naminé, when is your birthday?” Kairi asked over breakfast one day, scones with jam and clotted cream, served with a hot cup of tea for both of them. They liked to visit this cafe together at least once a month. It had outdoor seating, and the weather was finally warm enough again for them to sit outside with light jackets. 

Naminé stopped buttering her scone for a moment and frowned. It was a simple enough question, and yet she found herself unsure of what to say. 

“Well, I suppose it was the day Sora released his heart to save you,” she said at last. “But as glad as I am to be alive, it feels strange to celebrate that day, considering what happened.” 

“I understand,” Kairi said softly. “Are there any other days you can think of?”

Naminé paused once more and thought as Kairi sipped some more of her tea. The only other day she could really think of was… 

“The day of my rebirth. It was spring on Radiant Garden. The sun was shining, the flowers were blooming, and the weather was perfect.” She sighed happily at the memory. “I’ll never forget what it felt like to walk outside for the first time in a body of my own.”

“Then why don’t we make that your birthday? I know we technically missed it last year, when we were all searching for Sora, but it’s coming up here soon.” 

“Sure, that sounds nice.” Naminé put one more cube of sugar in her tea to get it to just the right sweetness, then added a little more cream and stirred. “I’ve never really thought about having a birthday of my own before.”

“Well, you deserve to have one,” Kairi said with a determined glint in her eye. “You’re your own person. Always have been, always will be.”

The two girls chatted some more as they finished their breakfast, and the subject soon slipped away from Naminé’s mind. It wasn’t until she and Xion were gathering shells together on Destiny Islands a few days later when the topic of birthdays came up again.

“See,” Xion said as she picked up a thalassa shell, “I like these ones the most, with the pink centers and yellow edges.” 

“I like them too. Yellow’s one of my favorite colors.”

Yellow was the color of the sun. A hopeful color for a girl that had begun her life in a cage, longing to see the outdoors for herself. For that reason alone it was precious to her. 

“You like blue too, right?” Xion said. She placed another thalassa shell in Naminé’s palm, this one with a blue center and yellow edges.

Naminé nodded. “Yes. Blue is the color of the sky… of the waves… all the things I longed to see when I was imprisoned in Castle Oblivion.” 

“It suits you, and so does yellow,” Xion said with a smile. “Born from the waves, and reborn during the spring.” 

“Xion, when is your birthday?” Naminé suddenly asked. She realized she hadn’t really gotten to celebrate it with her before. 

“Oh, my birthday? I figured it should be during the fall. I don’t know why, but I’ve always been drawn to falling leaves, the seasons changing, that kind of thing.” She smiled ruefully. “I suppose because I felt like my time was limited, just like those leaves. Kairi actually asked me about it recently, I think because she wants to—”  

Her eyes went wide, then she coughed and craned her neck. “Look, I see some more shells over there!”

Naminé found Xion’s startled reaction rather curious, but she didn’t press her friend. It was just nice to spend time together sharing a hobby they both enjoyed. For a girl who had started life with no friends of her own, Naminé was lucky to have so many now. 

The next time she met with her friends, it was for a picnic on Rapunzel’s world, in a clearing in the woods near a small pool. The weather was perfect, sunny with a breeze blowing dandelions and flower petals through the air, and she and Sora and Rapunzel were all cloud gazing after a delicious lunch of sandwiches and cookies and lemonade. 

“See that one right there?” Rapunzel said, pointing up at the sky. “It looks like Maximus.” 

“It sure does!” Sora put his hand behind his neck and grinned. “The sky’s full of all sorts of interesting clouds today.” 

“I wish I had my sketchbook with me,” Naminé said with a sigh. “I’d love to draw all of them.” 

“Take a picture with your Gummiphone then,” Sora suggested. “You can always draw it later based off of that.” 

“I’d like to, but I’ve run out of room in my sketchbook. I could really use some new pencils, too.”

Sora and Rapunzel exchanged glances, and Sora grinned.

“Naminé, you should come to the castle,” Rapunzel said. “I’d love to show you some of my art supplies. Have you ever tried painting before?”

Naminé shook her head. “No, I haven’t, but I’d love to. Thank you for the invitation.”

“What are we waiting for? Let’s go now!” Sora sat up and sprang to his feet. 

The three of them spent the rest of the afternoon trying out Rapunzel’s art supplies. Well, more like Rapunzel showed Naminé her things and let her try them out while Sora kept typing away at his Gummiphone. Naminé giggled at how he still typed with one finger, like a bird pecking at grains of rice. 

“There we go,” he said all of a sudden, then put his phone in his pocket. “What’d I miss?”

Naminé and Rapunzel both giggled and showed him what they’d made: a painting to hang on the walls of Naminé’s room in Twilight Town. It was of the beautiful woods where they’d had the picnic with dandelions flower petals floating through the air. As soon as she got home, she put it up and gave it a satisfied nod.

The days flew by until at last it was the anniversary of her rebirth. There was a knock on the door late in the afternoon, and when she went to get it, she was surprised to see Riku and Roxas waiting there for her.

“Hey Naminé,” Roxas greeted with a grin. His eyes were playful, like he had a big secret he couldn’t wait to share.

“Come with us, there’s something we’d like to show you,” Riku added, and she ducked back inside to grab a few things before following them through the woods and to the Old Mansion. 

“Why are we here?” she asked. 

“You’ll see,” was all Roxas and Riku said, and she followed them inside. She was shocked by how nice the entrance looked, like someone had been in here and cleaned things up—

“Surprise!”

She gasped as she entered the foyer. A huge banner hanging from the stairs read Happy Birthday Naminé, and all her friends were gathered around a large table in the center of the room. The evening light shone through the window behind them, pink and purple and blue, another gorgeous twilight on this world she called home now. 

“Happy Birthday Naminé!” her friends all cheered, and she couldn’t help the smile that spread across her face. So this was what they had been plotting and planning all this time. Roxas grinned and grabbed a camera to take a few shots, and Sora and Riku had some of those confetti poppers that they popped with loud crackling noises.  

The seashell decorations were yellow and the star candles were blue on the cake Xion held. Axel lit the candles, and they cast flickering lights and shadows over everyone’s faces.

Kairi leaned close and murmured, “Make a wish, but keep it secret.”

“A secret?” Naminé asked, tilting her head.

“It won’t come true if you tell us,” Ven explained, and Terra nodded. 

As Naminé looked at the faces of her friends, what she should wish for became clear. She knew, deep in her heart, what she wanted more than anything.

With that, she blew out the candles, and everyone cheered loudly. Aqua swept the cake out of Xion’s hands so she could cut it properly, and then everyone sat around the table. The cake was delicious, vanilla and lemon, and after everyone was done eating, it was time for Naminé to open her presents. 

“Here!” Sora said, his eyes shining as he handed her the first one. “It’s from all of us.”

Naminé’s hands shook as she removed the wrapping paper. She wasn’t used to getting gifts, and it took her some time to free the box. But once she did, she couldn’t have stopped the smile on her face even if she’d wanted to.

“They’re like the paints Rapunzel has! And in all the colors I like too.” She hugged the box to her chest. “Oh, thank you so much everyone, I can’t wait to use these.” 

When she was finished unwrapping the rest of her presents, more art supplies and nice jewelry and cute clothes, she thanked her friends for making this such a wonderful birthday night. But there was one last thing that would make it truly perfect.

“If you wouldn’t mind,” Naminé said, “let’s make a painting together. So we have something to help us remember tonight.”

Naminé loved drawing on her own, but drawing with her friends was truly wonderful. Everyone brought their own unique spark to the table. And when the painting was finished, it was one huge flowing mosaic of color and life and creativity. Sure, it wasn’t a masterpiece, but it was something truly unique that only they could have made. And that was why it was a work of art. Not because it was perfect or technically skilled, but because it had their hearts poured into it.

Naminé couldn’t have asked for a better way to commemorate her birthday.  

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A/N: Thank you so much to the mods for making this project possible and for being so caring and supportive! And thank you to the other contributors, this zine was such a joy and I enjoyed talking to you all. A big thank you too to Somnium for drawing the banner! I really enjoyed working with you!

And thank you for reading!

[themadauthorshatter]

So... I've been watching KH rewrites.

And while I'm not rewriting ALL of Kingdom Hearts, but I have a few ideas to change 358/2 days:

The organization has an agenda: find and kill Sora, Riku, and Kairi so they can stay out of the way, but with Sora sleeping, Kairi safe on Destiny Islands, and Riku running all over the place, their jobs just got harder.

The change the title to 358/3 days, because Axel's in on this too. This is the sea salt TRIO we're dealing with, not sea salt duo.

We see a majority of Roxas's beginner days, like before, but in between them, we see Xion with Axel, mainly because Xemnas trusts him enough to be able to incapacitate Xion, if she gets too fired up.

Oh yeah, Xion doesn't really look up and smile at Roxas when she first sees him. In game, her mouth just opens in a gasp and she clenches a fist. In her first days, she's strictly in 'attack anything that comes near me' mode because she's scared and confused. We see it happen when Demyx waves a hand in front of her face and she literally jiu jitsu throws him to the ground.

Xion stares at Roxas and Axel and follows them individually. Axel finds it creepy and warns her not to get any ideas while Roxas pretends not to notice.

Xemnas is more proactive, checking on and somewhat favoring Roxas and Xion, Roxas more than Xion at first before fully switching over to team Xion. Everyone notices, especially Larxene, and it's not a good thing. Except for Axel, who's okay to stay out of Xemnas's attention.

Larxene is a bitch. As in she not only tells Roxas to not use his keyblade, but also to hold still so she can kick him.

Lexeaus is a little kinder. He does still hit Roxas within an inch of his life, but he lets Roxas hit back, as hard as he can. Roxas does so, hitting him in the side, like by the abs, but not completely, and it only hurts Roxas more than Lexeaus, the big guy fights a pitied smile and tells him to try again. Roxas does so, hitting harder, and Lexeaus grunts and fakes it to look like Roxas really did hit him hard. Roxie boy apologizes, but Lexeaus brushes it off, complimenting that Roxas is a more than qorthy choice for the keyblade.

Zexion is not a fan of Roxas, because he looks too much like Ventus. He eventually has a silent kinshio with him and acts A LITTLE friendly towards him, but nothing serious.

Vexen has to be kept on a leesh so he doesn't lock Roxas in his lab and scientifically check him out. AT LEAST BEFORE HE GOES ON A MISSION WITH HIM. After that, he wants nothing to do with the kid.

Axel is a little weirded out by Roxas, at first, but warms up to him.

Marluxia is a little creepy in that while he trains with Roxas, like practice missions, he gets face caress-y and Roxas later asks Axel if he can not go on missions with Marluxia.

Xemans does not get like that with either of Roxas or Xion; all he does is ruffle/play with their hair and pat their back and shoulder.

AND XEMNAS ISN'T PORTRAYED AS A VILLAIN UP-FRONT. IN A PERFECT WORLD, THIS IS RELEASED BEFORE KH2!!!!!!

Saïx sees Axel's growing connections with Roxas and Xion, and he gets meaner because of it.

Roxas has his own version of anti-form or rage form, in the form of non-form, where he takes on a look very much like a mix of the samurai and dusk nobodies; he's bendy, fast, and hard as shot to lock onto, target-wise, but get hit and there's next to nothing that's going to save you. Roxas can only use non-form when he has no other optiin, and that's because he hates using it with a burning passion. Whenever he uses it, he has a hard time seeing things, so he relies on his hearing and any bright lights that catch his attention. Game wise, this is his limit break. When his health is low, non-form is activated with a cool looking transformation.

Non-form is the reason why Roxas is Xemnas's favorite, at first.

Xion doesn't talk to Roxas at all when they go on missions together, at least not until Roxas goes into non-form to save her, even though she doesn't really need saving.

Demyx was initially chosen to watch Roxas, but he saw the kid, newborn, scared, and confused, go into non-form and damn near attack him until Xemnas kicked him away. Saïx was the runner uo, but he gave the role to Axel, who successfully calmed Roxas down enough for the newbie to return to normal.

Xion warms up to Roxas, but is cold towards Axel, who returns the feeling, but also makes a deal with her; in front of Roxas, they have to play nice together or else Saïx is going to snitch to Xemans, who will have Xion ripped apart piece by piece until there's no putting her back together. Behind Roxas's back, however, they can fight all they want, as much as they want. Hell, they can even try to kill each other. BUT ONLY BEHIND ROXAS'S BACK SO HE DOESN'T SEE IT HAPPEN.

Roxas is given pretty lenient missions and it's not just because of his connection to Sora and Ven. It's also because of how unstable Non-form is.

Oh, yeah. Roxas hallucinates and hears both Sora AND Ventus, but it's only when things get too quiet. Xemnas has Axel keep an eye on him because he made friends with Ventus as Lea and had contact with Sora. If anything, the redhead can keep Roxas stable enough for them to bring him to Castle Oblivion and find Ven, when he's ready.

And he'll be ready when he dual wields keyblades, which Xemnas KNOWS wil happen because he's Xehanort and Xehanort apparently knows all.

He doesn't know enough because there's another person who can dual wield: Xion.

Xion is still a replica, but this time is made with fractures of Kairi's and Sora's hearts, Kairi being able to wield a keyblade because it got passed down from Aqua to her by accident and Sora because he's Sora.

When Axel is sent to Castle Oblivion and is reported as gone, Roxas's reaction is much more severe. First mission with Xigbar goes fine until the end, where Roxas not only gets hallucinations of Sora and all that, but also because he's experiencing a new emotion: GRIEF. He goes into Non-form and goes insane. Xigbar directs him to a dark corridor, where he's released right into the castle in The World That Never Was and starts destroying anything amd everything that moves before going all aroung the castle.

It soon becomes a really darkly comedic game of Catch The Kid Without Killing Him Or Letting Him Leave To Another World.

No one's fully successful, except for Saïx, who also goes berserk to stop and hold him so Xemnas can collect him. Roxas struggles in Saïx's arms and lets out scream after scream until Xemnas comes to get him and snap him out of it.

Roxas leaves Non-form and is led to his room by Xemnas, who compliments his ability to imitate emotions, despite not remembering how to.

Roxas, already trying to keep it together, breaks down again, and Xemnas holds him close, letting him get it all out, and explains that this is why they fight and need to fight warriors of the light, including Sora, Riku, and Kairi.

After that, Roxas is only allowed on recon missions until he's stable again.

It's fine though, because Axel makes it back a week later, saying he got knocked unconscious by Sora. He escaped and made it out a-okay, leavung out the part where he may have merced Vexen and Zexion.

Roxas is still glad.

Axel reports to Xemnas and Saïx and euns into Xion.

The threat still remains, but he's still playing nice for Roxas's sake.

Over time, Axel and Xion learn to get along and even become friendly enough to be sarcastic and jokey with each other.

It also helps that Xion also deals with hallucinations and her way of dealing with them is by running. Axel and Roxas followed her and came face to face with a GIANT heartless, maybe a more threatening version of the Dark Side.

All three fight it, but it knocks Xion and Axel away, the redhead gets up and is almost smashed into the ground before Xion lunges, going into her armored form. Roxas follows as well, in his Non-form.

The two make quick work of the heartless amd Roxas struggles to turn himself back, where Xion does it perfectly.

Axel compliments the work, but hugs onto Roxas before he can lash out at a frightened Xion, telling him to play nice or they're not having any more playdates and he'll be locked in his room 24/7.

Roxas turns back and he and a surprised Xion pass out, leaving Axel to groan at having all the icky jobs; he got the crap beaten out of him amd wants to pass out with the two children, but instead has to carry them back to the castle so neither die on his watch.

They all recuperate and pat themselves on the back for their victory.

Xemnas congratulates them as well, having let himself in the infirmary because he heard what happened.

Axel reports that they're all fine and the heartless is gone, and Xemnas is more than glad to hear it, at least before her turns to Roxas and asks if he was hurt, putting a hand on his shoulder.

He's fine, just a little dizzy, but fine.

Xemnas is more than glad to hear it, pushing back Roxas's bangs and playing with his hair a little before leaving them all to heal, ignoring Xion entirely.

She doesn't take it personally and instead remarks about how nice it was of Xemans to join them, for once.

Axel agrees with the sentiment and makes Roxas and Xion promise that they're won't be anymore surprise runaways like that again.

They agree, though Xion asks if surprise ice cream can be exempt.

Axel smiles and exempts surprise icecream.

They all become real friends after this point, and it includes them poking fun at each other("Er, I don't know my past so I'm gonna go Saïx berserk on anyone who asks, der, der, der"), sarcasm(Xion: "There really is no hiding from Saïx, is there?" Axel: "Well, there's always under Xigbar's bed, but no one's ever returned, so tell me how it goes."), and light name calling, like hot head, burning britches, and smoke and more smoke for Axel, hoodie and emo band for Roxas, and little miss pissed off for Xion, because she's funny to make annoyed and angry.

And they try more than sea salt icecream, like doughnuts, cakes, and eventually healthier foods that are still sweet.

Roxajs and Xion gonon missions together and eventually start more than a friendship.

Axel keeps an eye on them whenever he can and begins lying to Xemnas, saying neither are really progressing with their powers, but are maintaining, so there's that at least. Xemans is not convinced and asks an old question, considering how Axel has possibly the best memory out of everyone here: What happened to Sora? Axel feigns ignorance, because he TOTALLY helped Sora take out Marluxia.

Okay, but what about Naminé? More ignorance because she up and vanished. Maybe Sora stole her away or something, who knows? Teenagers do weird things.

Xemnas, more than a little fed up, notes that Axel's getting close to Rozas and Xion and admits that as much of a shame as it would be to waste resources, it'd be even more tragic to lose their own numbers, maybe even Saïx as well, despite how cold he's turned toward Axel. If it makes him feel better, he doesn't need to do the 'icky job,' Saïx can do it for him and he can simply watch.

Axel steps down and Xemnas twlls hom to tell the truth next time, if he doesn't want to lose anymore friends.

There will be a part 2 of this

[ajdrawshq]

For the niche ask game: Terra, Repliku, and Namine

FUCK YEAH THANK U OK

I'm gonna skip the smell question bc I literally do not know what to say abt that for anyone

Terra my beloved

• Song that reminds me of them: the only song I've ever associated with him is.. apparently Apocalypse by Sleeperstar according to my spotify playlist for him

• An otp: tbh,, I dont actually ship Terra with anyone

• A notp: anything w the minors and also,,, lowkey Terraqua,,, just bc I dont see them like that but since there's So Much of it its just. Yknow. I'm v sorry Terraqua enjoyers u do u

• Favorite platonic/familial relationships: I enjoy his relationships w Aqua and Ven so much....... AND WITH RIKU their interactions are so good

• Popular headcanon I disagree with: HES NOT THAT DUMB. PLEASE I know its just a fandom joke but I could go on and on abt how the way he was raised and how the total lack of proper guidance fucked him over so so bad but also there was no fucking way for Terra to figure out the stuff happening behind the scenes. Not once does he actually assist the villains without rightfully believing hes doing the right thing, the closest exception I can think of being when he helps Hook bc yeah that dude is pretty shady but he was asked to protect the chest, and only attacked in defense of it - something that is a defining trait of Terra, and his whole job is to protect the light which is vague as fuck so can u really blame him for thinking some of it was in a chest for some reason, plus Peter Pan is kind of a bitch so u can't really fault him for that fight anyway. And don't talk to me abt the sleeping beauty incident bc that wasn't his fault (although I admit its kind of funny that he just,, left) AND the entire Xehanort arc. Dont even get me started if Eraqus just let Terra know that Xehanort is up to shit instead of telling Aqua to spy on him and TELLING TERRA TO FIND XEHANORT WITHOUT ANY CONTEXT WHATSOEVER ALLOWING XEHANORT TO MANIPULATE HIM WITHOUT ANY TRUE HINTS ABOUT HIS MOTIVES we could've avoided like at least half the shit that went down in this game I swear I would've killed this old man with my bare hands. Anyway what was the question

• The position they sleep in: he takes up like 3/4s of any bed without trying i just know it.. and he seems like he'd be very warm. Sleeping next to him is absolute hell in the summer

• A crossover I'd love to see them in: does kingdom hearts itself count as a crossover considering all the d*sney and ff characters.. I just wanna see more Terra

• My favorite outfit theyve worn: how DARE u make me choose between his glorious flowy pants that I desperately want for myself and one of the best armor sets in all of kh.. but I'm going with his keyblade armor purely bc of that one shot thats just like. Terrass. Yknow the one

Repliku

• Song that reminds me of them: oh god I feel so strongly about this. I have a whole (very self indulgent and incomprehensible) playlist for them but I'm gonna say specifically Last Of Me by CircusP

• An otp: ok I wanna say Replinami. But. I've grown so attached to the idea of Repliku n Roxas being together its ridiculous

• A notp: w any adults obviously, and Riku and Replitwo. They're Siblings

• Favorite platonic/familial relationships: on that note I'm very very soft for their sibling relationships w those two. Whenever I think abt the kh3 Riku n Repli scenes I cry. Also love the idea of them being friends w Xion and Vanitas. And Sora..

• Popular headcanon I disagree with: are there,,, really any popular headcanons abt Repliku? I can barely find any for them to begin with lmao but I CAN say they're not cishet. Bi transfem Repliku my beloved

• The position they sleep in: considering how their life has been plus how touch starved they are, they usually curl up into a ball and/or hold something close to them

• A crossover I'd love to see them in: does my idea of showing them Pokemon The First Movie: Mewtwo Strikes Back as a form of therapy and/or enlightenment count. Ok but i actually wanna see them interact with Mewtwo for better or worse i think it'd be fun

• My favorite outfit theyve worn: I've talked enough abt the darksuit for this one to be obvious I think

Naminé

• Song that reminds me of them: ooooh this is a hard one...... I'm gonna say Worlds Apart by Seven Lions

• An otp: Namixi and Replinami are both very very good

• A notp: any adults, n im not rly a fan of her being w any of the destiny trio or Roxas

• Favorite platonic/familial relationships: on that note again i Do enjoy her general relationships with the above four.. and I like her dynamic with Axel/Lea tbh. And the idea of her and Terra being friends is vv neat. And I think she'd have a funky friendship w Vani. She has so many friends!! good for her, good for her

• Popular headcanon I disagree with: I cant think of anything in particular I disagree with I just think she should be allowed to kill people (read: Ansem TW)

• The position they sleep in: similar to Repliku, but she prefers being surrounded by something (whether it be pillows, weighted blanket, etc)

• A crossover I'd love to see them in: I think Naminé, Lunafreya from ffxv and Lillie from pkmn should meet.. they're sisters now

• My favorite outfit theyve worn: theres uh. Not a lot of options here (but all the fan made outfits ppl make for her are so epic and cool i love em)

[kessielrg]

[Kingdom Hearts] Of Memes and Regrets

Summary: In which Lea has a guest star for his YouTube's next Let's Play, and she perfectly steals the show from him.... again. [oneshot][platonic LeaxOC (AxelxOC)]

Rating: K+

Word Count: 2,412 words

If you liked this story, please reblog!

---

Lea glanced at the timer placed by his monitors and nearly tisked at the time.

She was late.

With a rather tired sigh, Lea started to work on making sure his software was still working right. Maybe while he was fiddling around with stuff, Sabrina would join the video chat so they could get a session done. He knew he should have asked Roxas to join again. Xion would be great to bring in too, if she wasn’t too busy working on her next article for her school’s paper. But alas, his subscribers had spoken, and they wanted Miss Priss and her insatiable need to annoy everyone. Especially him, apparently.

Not that he could blame them, she was great on camera.

Lea hummed as he booted up the game they were going to play. It was a review copy he had gotten a few days back, and he was actually looking forward to bumping it. He would be the first to admit to not being a big fan of the original franchise, but the graphics were crisp and the controls were smoother than butter. He knew Sabrina would have an appreciation for it too; as far as he could tell, the female characters were dressed sensibly- not at all designed just for the male gaze. They could have some fun talks about it when she got here. If she got here.

With the game running as expected, Lea started screen recording. He got a few minutes down before turning on his webcam as well. His face appeared on the screen to his left, with the game and recording software on the right. It was a good time to adjust lights while he was at it. Once that was settled, he began recording from the webcam as well. Lea admired himself in the webcam feedback for a moment. It was always better to overshoot, even if you weren’t really doing anything more than vocal warmups and adjusting your lighting.

Lea cleared his throat a bit before going through with his intro. He kept his tone bright and energetic. It was bad form to go in this early at full blast, but if Sabrina wasn’t going to remember their agreement, then he’d have to make due.

“Hey everybody, welcome back to AxelotlGaming! I’m Axel, and we were going to have a guest. Turns out she’s not coming, because at this point, we are well past being fashionably late.” Lea moved a bit away from the mic before grumbling, “It would’ve been nice if she actually bothered to tell me when she wasn’t coming. Could’ve been halfway through a recording by now.” He grimaced before remembering that he was still recording, so he turned back to the camera with a wide grin. He realized he was going to cut out a lot of his annoyance in editing later if he kept this up. The show always goes on, and whatnot.

“With or without our guest,” he went on to say to the webcam, “We’ve been sponsored to play the new-”

He hated to admit that he jumped when the ping for someone joining the video chat chimed. Lea quickly ended his recording softwares and accepted the newcomer. A new face appeared on the same monitor he kept his webcam feedback on, and he grimaced at seeing them.

“You’re late.” he huffed. He swiveled his car a bit just to glare at her feedback directly. Lea then almost proceeded to get knocked out of his seat looking at her.

Sabrina was a natural beauty and knew it. She was always light on her makeup regimen unless she was going to be seen on video or photograph. Today she did not plan on disappointing; her lips were painted a deep red, her cheeks the faintest of pinks to give the illusion of being an absolute sweetheart, and even the color around her eyes make them look more expressive. It was rather impressive- she must have worked on that for a good hour just to make sure she didn’t look like a raccoon.

“And now you realize why I’m late.” Sabrina smoothly told him, folding her arms with a smirk on her face. Even through the webcam, she looked so in control of everything. Lea didn’t know if it infuriated him, or was genuinely impressed.

“Yeah, yeah,” he said with a wave of his hand. “But know this, princess; just because I have an arguably easy job on paper, it doesn’t mean I don’t keep a schedule too. Got it memorized?”

“Just hire an editor.” she told him in the least of caring tones.

“No way!” he argued back. “I’ve got a certain method to my madness, and I’m not going to have someone else get their fingerprints all over it.”

“What a funny way of saying that no one else is as deranged as you.”

“Enough talk,” Lea then said to her with a clap of his hands, “We should be halfway through a session by now. Start up the game and make it snappy.”

Sabrina gave him a little wave of her hand before doing as she was told. She must have known how late she was- usually when someone told her to do something, her instinct was to react with the opposite. As she did that, Lea also went over his recording equipment and made sure he was recording as well.

“I’m ready when you are,” he decided. “Are you recording everything on your end?”

“Looks like it.” she agreed. Her eyes looked elsewhere for a moment- likely to check if everything was running smooth enough. When her eyes went back to the webcam, she settled back a bit in preparation for the next hour or so of recording.

“Are you doing the intro today?” she asked, gently placing a hand under her chin.

“My show, isn’t it?” Lea smirked. Knowing that she was ready meant it was time to start recording again. About time, too.

“Alright princess, put on your video face.” he warned her. “We’re getting serious in three… two…”

Both of them shifted in their spots slightly to appear more presentable. Lea gave them a few more moments of getting comfortable before going through his intro.

“Hey everybody, welcome back to AxelotlGaming! I’m Axel, and today I’ve got a very special guest. Special guest, why don’t you introduce yourself. Not that you need it, of course.”

“Of course.” Sabrina smoothly agreed, even twisting a piece of her hair. She looked at the webcam before giving a double wave to it. Her voice carried a perkiness never seen before as she said, “Hey guys! You asked for me, so here I am! Your favorite Lady Sabi here to show up, ah, I mean, play with Axel today.”

“So humble.” Lea playfully retorted. Sabrina only gave a wide -rather smug- smile in return.

“What are we playing today, Axel?” she cheerfully chirped. For a moment, Lea wondered if he was friends with a bubbly airhead instead of a pessimistic downer.

“We’ve been sponsored to play the new Blue Bomber MMO called ‘Renegade Chaser.’” he said, gesturing his hands to the side. He’ll edit in the box art during post. “Designed with old and new fans alike, Renegade Chaser can be played online and off with both multiplayer and single player modes.”

“Sell out.” Sabrina coughed into her hand.

“Yeah, well,” Lea mused, “Not all of us get free stuff just by looking pretty on Instagram. Of course, with almost a million followers at PrincessSabiAes2012, you’ve almost got enough influence to carry this channel on your own.”

“Nice plug.”

“Why thank you.”

“Bad rep for you though.”

“Why thank you.”

Sabrina let out a genuine laugh at his misfortune. But this was the kind of repertoire his subscribers enjoyed between them. Just hearing her laugh gave him a vision of a future comment along the lines of ‘hearing Sabi laugh at Axel adds 9,999 years to my life.’ Too bad the actual object of Sabrina’s -disguised- affection wasn’t on YouTube much, let alone have an account. Which was all for the best- he didn’t want to admit it, but Ventus got jealous real easy. Embarrassingly easy, depending on who you asked.

“Now that you’ve harassed me and we’re not even a minute in, how about we pop into game and see what we’ve got?”

“Let’s.” Sabrina agreed with a sweet little nod. 

Lea stole a look at her as she adjusted some things on her end to make sure her game footage was being recorded. Lea chastised himself for being so focused on her. He needed to stop getting distracted by her Clark Kent-ing her onscreen persona. But the switch was just so… uncanny, to put it in the nicest terms possible. There’s no wonder that despite her near million followers, Sabrina had yet to be recognized by any of them in person.

Lea shivered before continuing with his show. Two minutes of recording down, another 58 to go.

. . .

You could tell Sabrina was having a hard time getting used to the game because for ten straight minutes she did nothing but harass Lea instead. Not that it wasn’t to be expected- she was a puzzle girl, not a shoot-em-up girl. That being said, once she figured out the controls, she was nigh unstoppable. She even managed to figure out the special weapons before Lea could. Of course he called her a cheater for it. As long as it was in good fun, who really cared- right?

Another disorienting thing about Sabrina; she kept going from her usual snark to bubbly sunshine in mere seconds. The true (or as true as she wanted to be) part of her came through when she was at her most frustrated. It was yet another thing that his regular viewers came to appreciate of her. A lot of viewers really hated her bubbly self, even though it was arguably when she dished the most one-liners. Lea knew she was actually having a good time when she let the side of her he usually saw come through. That little lady knew how to be a savage and thrived in it.

One such occasion happened during this session. While the two were playing around with the various modes the game had, Lea had found a one-on-one free-for-all that the two took to immediately. Sabrina got so into beating him that he had to talk directly to her or else all commentary would have gone flat. Every word that came out of Sabrina’s mouth was straight from her mind, with no conscious censoring in the slightest. Lea feared so much for her that he intentionally threw the match. He did put up a fight- but it was definitely one of their shorter matches. Sabrina didn’t seem to notice as the victory screen appeared for her.

“Yes!” Sabrina gleefully declared, slamming her hands into her desk before giving her chair a spin. As the chair slowly came to a halt, she threw one of her hands over her head and gave an absolutely satisfied expression.

Lea knew right away that the moment his viewers saw that reaction, there were going to be memes of it. He could practically see them now- a really poor screenshot of that slightly worrying pose she was making, Impact font saying stuff like 'when bae buys you tacos without asking' or 'when Lea's such a moron and makes winning easy.' He'd have to ask her for her footage. He could emphasize the moment to help make some of those insufferable jpegs look slightly better.

It wouldn't have been so bad, but Sabrina was already the source of one of his channel's memes. 'Scrub my feet, peasant' was a line uttered during one Monopoly match that did not go in Lea's favor. Sabrina had also made a rather memorable pose in her chair, coupled with a rather smug face. It became so popular that Lea had to get her permission to make it into a t-shirt. Both Sabrina and his viewers had yet to live it down; Sabrina wearing the shirt anytime she knew the two of them would be in the same room together, and his viewers still made comments that referenced the line.

Good thing she was more of an Instagram queen and not a YouTuber. Lea would probably lose half his subscribers the moment she actually posted videos of her own.

“Heh, I let you win, my lady.” Lea boasted. This realization came to Sabrina with a slow grimace.

“You did.” she said in disappointment. She then smirked at him (not at the camera, but him directly on the screen), before spitting, “There are other ways to flirt with me than making me look superior to you.”

“Oh yeah?” Lea snorted. “Like what?”

Sabrina then smirked like she was taking on a challenge.

“Oh Axel,” she purred into her microphone. Almost immediately, Lea could feel the hairs on the back of his neck stand up. “If you wanted a mistress to teach you how bad of a boy you are, you could have just asked. This doesn’t have to be hard.” She paused for a moment, just to make it dramatic. “Unless you want to be…”

Lea was dead certain that his soul left his body for a hot second. His face absolutely betrayed him, though. He looked away just to hide how red it was.

“Oh well, just look at the time.” Lea decided, already reaching for the keyboard key to finish the recording. “We’re all gamed out for the day. Thank you for watching!”

“But Axel, we still have ten-”

“Thanks for watching!” he loudly declared before smacking the keyboard key. Not long after, his head hit the desk in both relief and frustration.

“Are you alright?” Sabrina questioned, a teasing smirk still on her lips.

“God I hate you.”

“You gonna be alright with that nosebleed?”

“Shut up.” Lea whined.

Sabrina just laughed at him. To rub salt into the wound, she ended the video chat mid-laugh. It was far too effective in leaving a phantom image of her on his mind. Lea let out another groan as he thought about his viewers’ reaction. This was going to be an episode to remember, he had no doubt about it. It was likely going to fuel even more rumors that the two had the hots for each other- which was the last thing he wanted.

He really needed to stop inviting her back.

[jcmorrigan]

001 - Kingdom Hearts

Favorite character: On the villain side: VEXEN IS BEST ORGANIZATION XIII MEMBER. Shoulda stayed evil, though. I like it when he complains and screams about everything and hates everyone. He's one of my favorite villains, just, like...in general. So fun to write. Also attached to Demyx, but I actually liked him more in III than II because it reminded me of my rawr lolspeek weeb days when I f/o'd him without knowing what f/o'ing was and then transitioned this to shipping VexDem like heck. On the hero side: MY GIRL KAIRI! But honorable mentions go to Sora, Riku, Aqua, Ven, Terra, Xion, Roxas, Lea, Ienzo, any Disney character I loved beforehand (this is way too fuckin many to list), Merlin (OKAY I WILL SINGLE HIM OUT), Yen Sid (I'LL SINGLE HIM OUT TOO), you know what let's also single out the Mickey+Donald+Goofy power trio...just...any KH hero who isn't part of the Yozora stuff or the KHUX stuff. ...Except I also LOVE Strelitzia, and she is the only KHUX-exclusive kiddo I care about but I care about her MANY. (Oh, and there's a least fave I have who's a "hero" but that's a debatable label). I would go on about why I love all of them but...that's too many characters to elaborate on

Least Favorite character: See, I think the real answer is Yozora, but the thing is I just tend to forget about him or not care (unless I'm doing a weird AU where he's Noctis' bratty Nobody, don't ask). He kinda represents the Shark Jump and I don't like watching that scene where he literally petrifies Sora for not being strong enough. But again, I can just kinda forget about him if he's not fed to me through a social-media unit. The one I LOVE TO HATE is Master Eraqus. The man actually triggered me back in the day. He is purity culture. He is the overbearing parent who will not accept you unless you are perfect. He is by and large the reason VAT didn't communicate with each other properly. He was the one who taught Aqua to think in absolutes. He lied to Ventus for years and then insisted to kill him was the only option, and then, when Terra tried to defend his brother figure/friend without knowing WHY Eraqus was doing such a thing, Eraqus didn't offer an explanation and instead switched targets to Terra citing that the problem was Terra's lack of OBEDIENCE. Eraqus is just very "my way or the highway" and uses his moral high horse to justify doing things that utterly lack compassion in any regard, which is something that GETS to me on a deep level, and let me tell you, I hated him for so long until I realized he was actually a super fuckin fun guy to imagine as a Bigger Bad in AUs that either have the KH protags teaming up or have villain protags needing a "greater good lawful evil" figure. And I just have found too many good memes about him cheating at chess and killing children. I have to laugh. Making fun of him is fun. He's a ridiculous character. That said, this recent trend of "erase everything bad he ever did and paint him as the ultimate hero of the saga" makes me raise eyebrows for SEVERAL reasons

5 Favorite ships (canon or non-canon): VexDem, SoRiku, Kairi x Jaune Arc (RWBY), Aqua x Rosalina (Super Mario Galaxy) x Bayonetta, IsaLea, Ventus x Papyrus (Undertale), that was six but they all needed to be mentioned

Character I find most attractive: Ienzo. HOO BABY he is adorable. I saw someone make a Valentine's Day gifset of KH and FF characters shortly after III dropped and seeing his smiling face paired with a romance quote made my heart FLUTTER

Character I would marry: Probably Ienzo, see above. He's also a very kind guy. Favorite redemption in the modern era.

Character I would be best friends with: I hope the Destiny Trio would adopt me into their friend circle the way they've tended to do with every other inter-world denizen they've come across. I would love to have them as my positivity squad. Or, y'know, two positivities and one "it's okay to screw up" guy. Just. I would love to hang out with them. I often worry that I'm unlikable to my faves, but even though I would usually prefer to hang with the villains, I can pretty much guarantee these three would be open-minded about me. (Do I kiiiiinda wanna be friends with Vexen though? Of course I do. He'd hate me but maaaayyyyybe he would see me as one of his pet idiots who makes him look smarter, and we could bond over our fragile egos?)

a random thought: You ever think about that one NPC lady in Traverse Town who refused to tell you where she was from because it was none of her business? You ever wonder where she WAS from? What her world was like? How she ended up being the survivor of the Ansem Apocalypse when it hit her? All I know is that when I read her lines out loud (I used to read KH speech balloons out loud all the time), I gave her a Southern accent for no discernible reason and I stand by it. That woman has a twang.

An unpopular opinion: I don't want KHUX to be canon because I feel it's smaller-scale and takes a lot of mystery out of the worldbuilding. I always assume that the KHverse just includes ALL worlds in fiction, and that includes their thousand-year histories, meaning the Age of Fairy Tales should've happened long long long LONG LONG LONG ago and not five generations. And whatever screwed up the world should've been more than just five people having a fight, and whatever saved it should've been more than just five people getting along, and Daybreak Town really suffers from having to stick to mobile-friendly graphics and therefore is the least aesthetically attractive KH town ever, and I don't like that Lauriam and Elrena used to be such selfless people. I do still love Strelitzia because she's shy and relatable and quirky (sitting on the roof) and she questions authority and if you go with shipping subtext she's probably bi (or pan?), but I don't like the "Lauriam's dead sister for his arc's drama" bit. I liked when Marluxia was angry because he wanted to run Organization XIII but it was in the hands of an idiot who wasn't him. And more than anything I just like imagining that the Age of Fairy Tales was something bigger, further in the past, and more mysterious than something designed for a mobile game. Scala ad Caelum, however, I like a lot better because there IS a lot of mystery there and also it's a very pretty town with an amazing design.

my canon OTP: I really only count the Disney couples as the "canon" ones, so this is a question of picking my favorite Disney couple that shows up onscreen. I hope I'm not forgetting an important one, but I think the title has to go to Aladdin/Jasmine, which is always perfect in everything. (This would be an ENTIRELY DIFFERENT STORY if KH had ever adapted Treasure Planet, and if it ever gets the mind to adapt Treasure Planet then even if I don't care about that game I will immediately declare that Amelia/Doppler takes the KH canon OTP crown. *taps watch* Get on it Squenix)

Non-canon OTP: SoRiku, which I counted as "basically canon" after DDD until III decided it wasn't sure. But I'm just a sucker for how DDD is the two of them all "HE'S GOT MY BACK AND I'VE GOT HIS AND I'D DO ANYTHING FOR HIM SO LONG AS HE'S HAPPY." It's just the best kind of Friends-to-Lovers, except when you take all canon into account it's Friends-to-Rivals-to-Enemies-to-Friends-to-Lovers and that's a very juicy dynamic. BUT ALSO: VexDem, which is a nostalgia ship SO STRONG I had to accept that it eclipsed my former Vexen ships by a mile and I wanted to go back to my roots. That one, I have a much longer essay about that I'll just have you refer to so I don't repeat myself for pages. To make a long story short, their scene in III was JUST DELICIOUS.

most badass character: OOF THEY'RE ALL BADASS but in the end it's between Sora and Aqua, because Sora gets the widest RANGE of abilities across the series that he masters while Aqua gets the most POWERFUL abilities due to her Mastery (Command Styles seem like they'd be the most OP things ever in-universe and I'm here for it because flashy battle moves make brain go brr).

pairing I am not a fan of: SOKAI, Xehaqus, RikuNami, Vanitas/anyone not evil

character I feel the writers screwed up (in one way or another): OH BOY. KAIRI THE MOST. YOU ALL KNOW WHY: lack of screen time, Fridging for drama, forced romance to invite death flags (they really wanted to milk that death to get people talking didn't they?), giving Alyson Stoner ZERO direction to actually follow up on Hayden Panettiere's performance. But then I remember that they made Vexen redeem and lose his entire personality and I just...uuugghhhh. I can't believe he died twice in this series. And then Demyx is FUN but also I know he's flipped sides as well, which means he won't be fun much longer! Xehanort seems to switch motivations to whatever makes him the biggest threat (and several of Eraqus' old flaws seem to be mysteriously glued onto him), Sora isn't a motormouth anymore, Riku just doesn't get anyone who cares about him anymore because everyone's distracted by Sora and Kairi, IS ANYBODY GOING TO ADDRESS THE ACTUAL ISSUES THAT DROVE THE WAYFINDER TRIO APART, oh God Marluxia and Larxene you're good guys now what have they done to you

favourite friendship: I really like each of the trios. But you know what's even BETTER than the trios? If you put...all of the trios together...meaning Sora, Riku, Kairi, Mickey, Donald, Goofy, Aqua, Terra, Ven, Roxas, Xion, Lea, Hayner, Pence, Olette...and then you added Isa back in there...and you gave them Ienzo...and you brought back Naminé...and you say that Subject X is Strelitzia and you have her turn back up so she can have justice done...AND YOU HAVE AN ULTRA KEYBLADE GROUP OF FRIENDS. As for Vexen, any purely platonic relationship I have for him is a crossover but trust me I have many crossover pals for he

character I want to adopt or be adopted by: See everyone I listed above in the friendship question. They can either mentor me or let me be their big sis/mom. But also, I will GLADLY be Merlin or Yen Sid's daughter. (But also would I kiiiiinda wanna be a VexDem daughter? This is the worst idea. Still wanna try)

[bigdrchief]

Comet’s Melody (Kingdom Hearts/Ducktales)

Idea popped up in my head, needed to write it down.

Roxas sighed as he tasted the ice cream, the salty flavor failing to uplift his feelings.

He was preparing for a new mission for Organization XIII, this time to Agrabah to plant some sort of device. However, he managed to get some time to himself by claiming that he was coming to Twilight Town to “train”.

In reality, he was contemplating on whether or not he should leave the organization.

The idea seemed far-fetched at first: they were the closest he had to a family, especially with his friends Axel and Xion. However, the lack of information being told, combined with the unclear motives behind Xion, was beginning to get to him.

Was there a point working for the organization anymore? It feels more like a prison than a place he could live in now…

Roxas sighed, feeling ‘discontent’ about not telling Axel or Xion about his “training”, but this was something he needed to think about for himself.

As he sat at the clock tower, contemplating his choices, he noticed a shooting star in the distance.

Huh, he thought to himself. Didn’t think stars would fall in the daytime… I think somebody once said that you could make wishes on them… If so, then I wish for a sign on what to do, something to show why I’m here, why I’m so special to the Organization...

He closed his eyes and prayed, and he opened them to find the star slowly heading to the forest. Eyes wide he quickly stands up and watches as the star lands near the old manor on the outskirts of Twilight Town…

...The same place that he had woken up before, at least he had the feeling that was where the Organization had found him.

“What the heck…?”

Questions surged through his mind as he tried to figure out what had just happened. WIth nothing better to do, he decided to go investigate the ‘star’.

At least he’ll be able to take his mind off the Organization for a while…

Getting there was easy, as having to run around all across various places helped with improving his stamina. Passing by various flyers and posters, he managed to reach the entrance of the woods and quickly entered it.

As he moved throughout the forest, there was the occasional Heartless grazing around, but he was able to quickly take care of any that attacked him with his Oathkeeper.

After a while, he finally managed to reach the old manor, gasping out of breath.

As he was catching his breath, the ‘star’ landed at the front of the gates of the wall, a bright glow quickly filling the area. Roxas quickly closed his eyes, averting himself from blindness, before opening as the light faded.

His eyes widened as he saw, laying down in front of the manor, was some sort of white-feathered avian humanoid.

The figure wore some sort of brown aviator’s clothing, with a brown pilot’s helmet and faded  blue scarf, alongside some beige shorts.

While aware of how ‘out there’ people’s appearances can be due to how different each world is, he couldn’t really recall encountering any bird-like people before. Wait…

As he attempted to remember if he had seen such individuals before, the duck person groaned, reminding Roxas that despite the lack of impact, somebody had just crashed onto the ground.

“Are you alright?” he asks as he quickly makes his way to person, helping her stand by.

As he did, however, he made eye contact with her, bright blue to cyan. What stared back at him was emptiness, an all too familiar emptiness, one that he needed to determine quickly.

“Uh, do you remember anything?”

The duck blinked, and as she dusted herself off slowly, crinkles spread across her forehead as she slowly blinked.

“I… don’t...” she said dully.

A Nobody. The duck was a new Nobody.

What else could explain the emptiness of her eyes, something that he often saw faintly in the other Organization members, a sign of their own literal emptiness.

Suddenly he was glad that he had chosen to be alone. He had no idea how Axel would have acted, regardless of his feelings on the matter, and he certainly didn’t trust any other Organization member to have been more gentle with the woman.

...Except for Xion.

“Uh, do you remember your name?” Roxas asked.

“My name…?” she said softly, rubbing her fingers across her shorts. “...It’s Della...I think...”

Della, right. He had no idea how to do this actually. Was he supposed to give her a new name, considering she was a Nobody? It was essentially how the Organization leader named him, and he certainly didn’t like how much his name was connected to Sora.

...On the other hand, he didn’t really know how you go about naming Nobodies. Naming yourself with an X seemed to be how Nobodies were expected to be named. Besides, he could at the very least have the petty claim of giving Nobody a name, like the Organization’s leader. Take that!

“Well, do you mind a new name?” Roxas asked, getting flustered when Della turned towards him in confusion. “N-Not that your old name is bad, but you’re a, uh, Nobody, and Nobodies who retained their selves tend to have names with Xs in them.”

Yeah, this was probably a bad idea.

Still, he was pleasantly surprised when she nodded, though that could also be a result of her still being dazed. Axel had claimed that he was like a zombie when he had first joined the Organization, so it was likely that she was in a similar state as well.

“Right, so I was thinking… Uh...”

He tapped his head as he attempted to figure out a cool name to give her, before finally having an eureka after sounding out the syllables in his head of one combination of letters.

“Oh, how about Xellda? Will that work for you?”

Yeah, it wasn’t all that original, but it sounded cool!

“...It sounds cool.” Xellda said, smiling at the name.

“Right!”

With that out of the way, Roxas knew that he had to confront the Emblem Heartless in the room: the fact that she was a Nobody who was aware of herself.

If the Organization ever found out about her, he was certain that they would kill her on the spot. They were obsessed with keeping to 13 members, and with how little they seem to view of Xion, it was possible that they might execute her too.

It was only speculation, of course, but the fact that the empty seats remained empty seemed to be proof of this in his eyes anyway.

“Okay, so─?” As Roxas was about to talk, he quickly stumbled over his words as he realized that he had no idea just how conscious Xellda was at the moment.

If she was a zombie like he was when he first appeared, then it was likely that she may stare at a wall for hours or something if not left with something to do! And staring at walls would do no good if the Organization ever found out about her.

“Hey, would you like to hear a joke?”

Xellda blinked, some uncertainty creeping in. “Uh… sure.”

It was probably pretty foolish, but he couldn’t really think of any other way to get her to express her feelings realistically.

“Okay, so uh, what is the favorite letter of the ocean? It’s B!─ wait no, that’s for flowers and pollen, I meant C!” Roxas quickly stammered out as he messed up a joke he had heard from the locals of Twilight Town. “I C─!, No, just C!”

As he messed up the quite easy joke, the corners of the duck’s bill slowly turned up, a feeling of Deja vu arising in her, slowly leaking out as a small chuckle. Soon the chuckle turned into small laughter at the ridiculousness of the event, stunning Roxas a bit. Soon, however, he also began laughing at the quite hilarious event.

It reminded him a lot of what things were like before everything that had happened, and it was nice to not have to worry about his and Xion’s existence so much.

Once the laughter died down, Xellda’s face settled in a more neutral and confused expression as Roxas finally settled on a plan.

“Okay, so I guess I should introduce myself. My name is Roxas, a Nobody like you.”

“A Nobody...?”

“People who have a strong enough will to survive their heart being lost. That’s the general explanation, anyway. I’m a part of an organization known as Organization XIII, which mainly consists of high-ranking Nobodies. They wear cloaks like these,” he says as he pulls at the fabric of his robes, “which helps to protect them from the darkness. I’m not sure what will happen if they find out about you, and I don’t want to know. So I need you to trust me, okay?”

“Trust you…?”

“Yeah, you probably don’t want to, considering I’m a stranger and all.” Roxas sighed as he thought back to Axel. “...Even if you don’t, I’ll still do my best to help you. Right now, you actually remind me of myself actually.”

“...Okay.”

Roxas blinked. “Wait, you’re saying you’ll trust me then?”

When the duck nodded, Roxas sighed, wondering why getting Axel to explain himself couldn’t be this easy. “Okay, the plan is simple. I have no choice but to go back to the Organization, so while I’m gone, you should hide out in Twilight Town outside of the woods. There’s a path you can take there.”

As he says this, he points towards the forest outside the manor. “I’ll be gone for a few days, so I’m thinking that after a week, we should meet up at the top of the clocktower of Twilight Town. Before then, you should try and blend into town, maybe help out the people there.”

He paused, recalling a certain flyer he had passed earlier. “If you come to the tower and I’m not there, then you’ll need a permanent place to stay at. There’s an open inn inside the town, so if you need a place to stay, you should stay there… Is this plan alright with you?”

Xellda nodded, clearly satisfied.

“Good! I, uh, need to go back now, but I can help take you to-”

“No thanks.”

“Huh?” Roxas exclaimed.

“No thanks. I don’t know… why, but I want to try and get to this town myself.”

“Oh… okay then! If you’re sure, then I guess I’ll be going then. See ya!” Roxas began to run off in the distance, taking the time to wave back as he entered the forest.

A minute after Roxas had run off into the forest, Xellda made her way forward, compelled by some feeling inside of her that she had difficulty understanding.

She didn’t know what was going on, only what the boy Roxas had told her, and the faint memory that lay in her head.

The feeling of needing to return home because of something important… Why? Why did she need to return home so desperately?

If possible, she needed to figure out who she was, who ‘Della’ was, or else this feeling becomes suffocating?

Still, why did it feel so lifeless? Why does her heart feel so…

...

...Empty…?

[actress4him]

So, this isn’t DoD related, but some of my readers ( @nevquariel and @coolmegan123 , specifically) were interested in hearing more about the other KH project I have in the works. As I mentioned in the comments of my last post, I started writing it while editing Sorrow’s Promise, and have dabbled with it off and on since then, though not for a while. I’m not sure when it will get finished and posted, I may take a break from KH for a little bit after I finish DoD, but we’ll see.

This story is multi-chap but stand alone, not a series. It’s really unlike anything else I’ve written. I generally stick with at least partially canon-verse in my fanfiction, but this one is definitely an AU, and not just by being canon-divergent or having an original character. Nope, this is set in a completely different world, in my own, made-up era, and only the characters (and a few fun parallels to canon here and there) stay the same. I’ve tried to keep everyone in character as much as possible, though Sora is the most changed just because of his circumstances. We see more of the real Sora in the flashbacks at the beginning of every chapter.

TL;DR, aka the tagline for the story - 

In which Sora is Roxas, Xemnas is a mobster, Kairi is an actual princess, Axel is everyone's slightly unstable big brother, and Riku just wants to fix his mistakes...but what's new about that?

Starring Sora and Riku, with Axel and Naminé in primary support roles, Xion, Kairi, and Saix in secondary support roles, and pretty much every other KH character you can think of as the ensemble.

And now, because I love to spoil you guys, a sneak peek at chapter 1, below the cut. Enjoy, and let me know what you think!

Chapter 1

Sora stumbled off of the train car and into Central Station, bumping right into Riku's back.  The older boy had halted in his path and was gazing around at the grand building, and Sora followed suite, eyes wide with wonder.  There were so many people everywhere.  They had never encountered a crowd quite like this one back at home.

As they began moving forward again, Sora reached out and clung to Riku's shirt, afraid that they might get separated.  Soon they found themselves being swept out the front door and into the sunshine of Twilight Town.  We made it.  We're actually here.

“Where do we go now?” 

Riku glanced back at Sora, scratching the back of his head.  “Uh...why don't we just walk around for a while, get a feel for the place?”  To anyone else, he would have sounded like he knew exactly what he was talking about. Only Sora had known him for long enough to detect the hint of nervousness in his voice.

“Yeah, okay.”  Sora swallowed, trying not to feel too nervous, himself.  This is what we wanted, remember?  A new town, new people...anything but what we had.   

Riku led the way through the unfamiliar streets, pointing out various shops that they passed along the way, obviously doing his best to make them both feel at ease. Sora tried his best to relax and enjoy the sights, but his rumbling stomach wasn't doing much to help in that area.   

“Can we get something to eat? I'm starving.”

Riku stopped walking and turned to face Sora, a frown on his face.  “Well, we don't have a lot of munny left.”  Digging the pouch out of his pocket, he tugged it open and peered inside.  “The train tickets cost more than I thought they would.  So, we can get food, but only a little, okay? We've still got to figure out where we're gonna sleep tonight, too.”

Sora nodded.  “Yeah, I'm really tired.”  He stretched his arms above his head and yawned as if to prove the point. Laughing, Riku knocked Sora on the head.  “I told you you should've slept on the train.”

They started to head into a nearby cafe, but were interrupted by someone calling out, “Hey, kids!”

Wrinkling his nose, Sora turned to see a couple of older teens, one with bright red hair and one with blue, walking towards them.  “Are you talking to us?” he asked, pointing to his chest.

“We're not kids.”  Riku crossed his arms and glared at the newcomers.

“Right, right.”  The redhead waved his hands apologetically.  “I'm sure you're much older and tougher than you look.”

“I'm Isa, and this is Lea,” the one with the long, blue hair and a strange scar between his eyes spoke up.   

“You can call me Axel,” the redhead countered.

Riku studied them for a moment longer before dropping his arms.  “Riku.  That's Sora.”

“Great.  Look, we couldn't help but overhear a little of your conversation,” Axel commented.  “You guys new to town?”

“Just got here,” Sora piped up.

“Where are you from?” Isa questioned.

Riku shook his head.  “Doesn't matter.  We're never going back there.”

Axel and Isa exchanged a look that Sora couldn't read before Axel spoke again.  “Listen, if you're looking for something to eat and somewhere to stay, we know a place. There's this guy we work for, along with a bunch of others just like you, and he lets us all sleep and eat at his place, too.  It's a pretty good deal...a bit of work for him, in exchange for a bed and free meals.”  He smiled earnestly and looked each of the boys in the eye.  “What do you think, sound good?”

Sora cut his eyes over to Riku.  It sounded great to him, but as the oldest, Riku was always the one to make the decisions.  He could tell his friend was mulling over the offer.  Finally he nodded to Sora, then smiled at the two older boys. “Sounds good.  Lead the way.”

.o.0.O.0.o.

“Hey.  Wake up, sleeping beauty.”   

A hand was pummeling Sora's head down into his pillow.  Instinctively, his fist shot out and made contact with something hard, prompting a stream of curses from the human alarm clock.  Much more awake now, Sora rolled over, shaking his hand and glaring at Axel, who had retreated to his own bunk across the narrow room to whimper and rub his jaw.

“Serves you right,” Sora growled. 

“Hey, I'm just trying to do you a favor and keep you out of trouble.”  Axel gestured towards the rest of the bunks with the hand that wasn't holding his face.  “You're the last one up.  Again.  They're not gonna be serving breakfast for much longer.”

Groaning, Sora pried himself up off the hard mattress and fumbled for his black boots underneath the bed.  A moment later, he was up and shuffling sleepily towards the door.   

“You know, a 'thank you' wouldn't kill you!” Axel called after him.

The thought of food was enough to prod Sora into a jog as he made his way down first one stark white hallway, then another.  When he finally reached the mess hall, the usual din of clanging plates and murmuring voices met his ears.  Axel had been right, everyone else was already here. Hurrying over to the kitchen window, Sora cleared his throat to catch the attention of the server.  The response was a side eye, a snarl, then thankfully, a piece of bread and a spoonful of mush slapped onto a plate and shoved across the counter towards him.  Sora breathed a sigh of relief.  Just in the nick of time.  I really should thank Axel later.   

As Sora turned to look for a place to sit, he found himself face to, well, chest with one of his least favorite people in the world.  He lifted his chin to meet Marluxia's stare with a scowl.  “What do you want?” 

“Heard you had issues in Agrabah yesterday.”  The tall, muscular man shook his pink mane.   

“What's it to you if I did?”   

“Personally, I'm hoping that means you'll get kicked off that mission and I'll get it instead.”  This comment came from Larxene, who had walked up just out of range of Sora's peripheral vision.  He whirled around to glare at her instead.  “I'm getting really tired of Wonderland, after all,” she continued, chewing idly on a piece of bread.   

Sora's eyes narrowed.  Wait, that bread... It only took him a second to make the connection.  “Give it back, Larxene!”  He lunged forward to snatch it out of her mouth, not even caring that she had contaminated it.   

She ran a few steps back, smirking.  “Come and get it!”

He would have done exactly that, had he not felt a pull at the plate in his hand. Marluxia had a hold of it, and though Sora was pretty strong, he was no match for those muscles.  The older man wrenched it out of his grasp in a matter of seconds.  Gritting his teeth, Sora gave up the mush for lost and chose to go after Larxene instead, hoping to salvage whatever bread might be left.  He ran straight into her, tackling her to the floor.   

Before either of them could get in any punches, however, a loud voice rang out across the room.  “No fighting!”   

Eyes going wide, Sora scrambled off of the blonde and stumbled away as fast as he could.  No crust of bread was worth getting punished for fighting. His stomach wasn't exactly sure it agreed, however.  It protested its emptiness harshly enough to make him grimace as he sank down to the floor in an empty corner of the room, watching with clenched fists as Marluxia and Larxene sauntered away to find their next unsuspecting victim.

“Here.”  Sora had been so engrossed in his anger that he hadn't even noticed Axel enter the room and plop down next to him.  “Take this.  It's from last night.  I was saving it for later, but you need it more than I do.”

Sora stared down at the proffered food for a moment, then turned his head away.  “I don't need you to take care of me.”

Axel sighed loudly.  “No, I know you don't.  But you also don't need to go out in the field today not having eaten since yesterday morning.  I'm well aware that you didn't get dinner last night because of whatever went wrong in Agrabah.”

“It's not my fault that some towns actually have decent government in place.” Sora shook his head slightly.  “People see somebody like us skulking around, they tell the authorities.  I'm lucky I saw them coming and got out of there without being questioned or imprisoned.”

“Yeah, you are. I know it's unfair, Rox, you don't have to tell me that.”  Catching sight of the daggers that Sora was shooting from his eyes, Axel put up a hand in apology for the name blunder.  “I mean Sora, sorry. Now would you just take the food?  Neither of us really want to know what the penalty is for passing out and not making it back from a mission.”

Sora snatched the small bundle out of his hand with a grunt.  “Fine.”  The food wasn't much, but it would certainly be better than nothing.  Maybe, if he was lucky, he could pilfer an apple or something while on the job later.  “Thanks,” he mumbled with his mouth full.

“No problem.” Axel ran a hand over his wild red hair, the flattened spikes immediately popping back up into place.  “Try to play it cool with Saix when you see him.  Confident, like you know you're capable of doing the job, but not too cocky.  He'll probably dock you down to something more menial than territory expansion, but you'd better not show him one speck of attitude about it or...”

“Or I'll regret it, I know the drill.”  Sora finished off the food and licked a crumb from his finger.  “You ready?  Might as well get it over with.”

“Yeah.”  Axel pushed himself up to his feet, then held out a mass of black fabric. “Here, I brought these.  You forgot yours in your rush.”

Grunting his thanks, Sora took the cloak and fastened it around his neck.  On the other side of the room, most of the other soldiers, as they were unofficially called, were already lining up to receive their assignments.  When his turn came, Sora stepped in front of Saix, meeting his cold gaze but trying his best to keep his own expression neutral.   

“Roxas.” Saix's eyes flicked down to the clipboard in his hand, then back up to Sora's.  “Debt collection.  Twilight Town, east side.”

Sora blinked, the familiarity of that name sending a jolt through his brain, but forced himself to nod stiffly and pull his hood up over his face.   

“You don't need a portal for Twilight Town,” Saix sneered after a moment of silence.  Sora glanced back up at him, and he pointed to the door. “Go.”

Right. Nodding silently again, Sora stepped out of line and headed back across the room and out the door.  So, this really was more punishment.  Not only was he stuck with his least favorite task of debt collection, but he had also been relegated to the town that was so close by, you could walk to it rather than being sent by portal. A fabulous trek on a nearly empty stomach.

In another half hour, the walls of Twilight Town came into view, with the clock tower in the center of town poking out up above.  That jolt ran through him once again.  Several years ago, when they had first joined The Organization, he and Riku had often worked Twilight Town together.  But that had been a long time ago, back before they had gotten promoted to bigger and better locations.  On occasion after that, each of them would work a shift here, but Sora had not been back in a while.  Not since Riku...

Shaking his head violently, Sora stamped out those thoughts before they could fully materialize.  Stick with the present.  Dwelling on the past never gets you anywhere.  With a sigh, he walked through the gates of the city and surveyed the quiet streets.  Well, this munny isn't going to collect itself.

DO NOT REPOST OR REBLOG WITHOUT CREDIT!

[nobodies-png]

I see some poor anon lost their best friend and I lost my mother just recently. May I request some hc's of how the organization members would (at least try to) comfort someone who has lost someone dear? It's okay tho if you don't want to ^^ - M

 awe, sorry to hear that, nonnie ! and sorry for replying to this one so late too, hope 2020 brings you a lotta joy and happiness ! 

Xemnas : 

A part of him can relate to that feeling, even if he doesn’t understand exactly why or how. Nonetheless, Xemnas would simply listen to every word you had to get out of your chest - but if none come out, he’ll gladly stay by your side in absolute comforting silence. Sometimes, peace and quiet to calm the mind can do more than endless words of encouragement. And he’d be too awkward to just go and give you a hug, so the only thing he can do is offer you his company, along with time and a safe space to get your thoughts and feelings in order.

Xigbar :

One would expect Xigbar to take you to some whacky adventures so you can distract yourself from those negative thoughts and feelings - but he’s also dealt with his fair share of loss and he’s found that facing the facts and coming to terms with them helps more than idle and mindless fun. Of course, it takes time to gather the courage and stability to do so - but if you ever need a reality check and some down to earth advice for something this serious, Xigbar’s your guy. Honor the past and cherish the good memories, but dont dwell so much on them. Don’t let them hold you back !

Xaldin : 

Hands down, Xaldin s u c k s at comforting people, specially as a Nobody and his complex relationship with f e e l i n g s. What is he supposed to say in these situations ? Hell, even giving you a pat on the back is hard for him. Like, is it okay for him to do so ? What if you start crying ? ? Because of this, he can only say he’s a good listener, maybe give you some general words of advice here and there. However, he wouldn’t be against cooking something for you - a nice warm meal followed by a good rest is usually what he does whenever he has a bad day. You’re even welcome to steal from the cookie jar and brag about it to Demyx and Axel.

Vexen :

As a scientist, it’s very easy for Vexen to detach himself from emotional situations and come up with a straightforward and cold reply to your loss. It’s the way he deals with things that require a heart, after all. Brain = good. Heart = confusing. Easy peasy. Of course, when he realizes that this method clearly doesn’t work and that you’re about to smack him, Vexen would feel a b i t guilty and offer to help in a different way. It’s very easy to let yourself go after losing someone and accidentally adapt some unhealthy habits - this is where he comes in, helping you make a schedule so you don’t end up oversleeping, skipping meals or avoid being active.

Lexaeus : 

Lexaeus is also a silent listener, it’s just kinda how he rolls. But unlike Xaldin who struggles with it, Lexaeus is good at comforting others without the need of words. Definitely one of the very few people in the organization that would hug and hold you for as long as you need, not caring if you stain his coat with tears. His aura and willingness to protect others can make anyone feel safe with him, so you’re in good hands. Lexaeus would even give you one of his little puzzle toys, in case he can’t be around. They might be small, but they sure help a lot to distract you for a while and remember that he’s got your back. 

Zexion :

Zexion might be emotionally constipated due to his status as a Nobody, but he’s no stranger to the negative emotions of the human psyche. If you reach out to him, he’d be willing to help - but you gotta keep in mind that he’s still a kid at heart and hasn’t found the proper way to cope and deal with his own feelings. Still, Zexion makes up for his lack of knowledge when it comes to comforting with his extense collection of books ! He’d recommend you things to read, both literature you two could discuss as a past time and articles about dealing with loss and grief. He’d also make use of his powers to create illusions you might enjoy if you’ve had a particulary rough day.

Saix : 

Saix doesn’t comfort, at least not so openly like other members. His approach is pretty much the aftermath of Vexen’s idea to give you a schedule - so long story short, Saix is the one who’d enforce and make sure you follow it. Which means he’s gonna be on your ass most of the time and as annoying as that might sound (Demyx feels so bad for you because of this) if you squint really really hard, you’ll notice that he does care about your wellbeing. “You have to keep on moving” he’d say, while sending you into your 6th mission of the day, which simply consists on taking care of a few heartless and some general recon. You’ll also find that most of your reports have been already filled out, but hey, don’t ask him.

Axel : 

Another awkward guy - Axel has trouble comforting friends, but damn if he’s not going to try. The way he speaks is more than enough to cheer you up, or at the very least give you back that passion you had prior your loss, it’s like he sparks a fire in you ! You just gotta go all out, ride all of this out and. Cry, scream, feel everything you gotta feel and then kick back with people you can trust, eat some ice cream with them. Allow yourself to be vulnerable and held. Axel would totally invite you to join him, Xion and Roxas to their whacky adventures around Twilight Town.

Demyx : 

Very obvious, but Demyx would encourage you write a song about it. It’s what he does to sort his feelings out, figure out what feels right in the end. And besides, learning how to play an instrument is always fun - you also got the best (and only) music teacher in the organization ! If that’s not your cup of tea, then you can try any other artistic outlet. Dancing, writing, etc etc. Demyx is fully aware that fortnite dancing at 3 am is not going to fix his problems, but it sure helps him stay grounded and remember that life is not as serious as we make it out to be.

Luxord : 

Luxord is very polite, so he won’t pry into your business - but the second he notices little changes in you like that permanent tired expression or the way you sigh a little too much on a daily basis, he’d invite you over for tea, subtly give you an excuse to talk to him and vent should you need it without being too invasive or forward. If you still can’t or refuse to open up, Luxord would take you for a walk around Wonderland or another colorful and fun world, giving you some advice in the form of his cryptid ramblings. When a door closes, another opens - and if there aren’t any, then you just have to open a window, get some fresh air and a new perspective.

Marluxia :

Marluxia can also relate to that. Surprisingly, he’d be very gentle, asking if you’d like to share some happy memories you have with that someone. Maybe even set up a small makeshift “shrine” in their honour, of course covered with their favorite flowers. He’s just happy to help you, listening to you reminisce and remember them with a smile on your face. It’s very shocking to see this side of him, given how flamboyant and eccentric he can be - but those passing encouraging smiles Marluxia gives you whenever he sees you are a great comfort.

Larxene :

Larxene is… Not the best choice if you want to be comforted. Her method is an extreme version of Xigbar’s, she’ll simply offer a quick “deal with it” and a hard “grow up and accept it”. While she might be impulsive and very emotional Larxene is actually a very logical person with a good understanding of her own feelings. What you can learn from her is that everyone needs to ultimately find their own way of coping and dealing with grief, no one else can tell you how or when to feel a certain way no matter how good their intentions might be. Take the good advice, but don’t depend on others for everything. Your way might be unconventional, but as long as it’s not hamrful for yourself and you’re aware of your limits, it’s good enough.

Roxas :

Roxas doesn’t know what to do, at all. So he’d simply ask about what YOU want to do now. How would you like to deal with these feelings and such. He’ll be there right next to you, even if you just wanna cry and sleep it off or if you want to distract yourself and never speak about it. Roxas is there, holding your hand all the way and making sure you know you’re not alone. Like Marluxia, he might also ask about the person you lost, just out of curiosity. And then maybe internally facepalm because oh shit, what if you don’t want to talk about it. The way Roxas worries about you, stuttering apologies and awkwardly explaining that he simply wants to make you feel better is so endearing that you can’t help but feel safe and sound.

Xion :

Xion would simply take you to Destiny Islands, to watch the waves, feel the sand and the sun on your skin. She wouldn’t ask at all, instead explaining that this is the place she goes to whenever she’s feeling confused, lost or just a little under the weather - and now, she wants to share this with you. You don’t have to say a thing, Xion doesn’t need to know your pain to realize that you just need a friend and a shoulder to cry on. Someone to rely on. The two of you would just spend the afternoon picking up seashells, exploring the island and relaxing. She’ll gladly listen if you have anything to say, but it’s okay, you’ve done enough. Let her take care of you now.

[nadziejastar]

OMG, thank you so much for sending this! And thank you to the person who translated it! This story proves to me that Lea and Isa were just too gay for the mainstream Kingdom Hearts series. Seriously.

We thought we could save that girl. I don’t know why we felt that way.

The little story is very nice. It’s about as good as it can possibly be given the shitty source material that is KH3. I thought it was hilarious how Isa has pretty much nothing to say about Subject X. Oh yeah, she sounds so important to him here, doesn’t she? Isa sacrificed everything for her, lol. Maybe you just wanted to help her, Isa, because you had a good heart. Ever think of that? 

But for real, what a crock of shit that whole idea is. Skuld was just shoehorned into their story because Axel and Saïx were too gay otherwise. That’s all it its. Just blatant homophobia, and I’m disappointed in Square and Disney for it. It’s okay to shiptease popular same-sex couples, but as soon as there’s an actual same-sex couple, they go out of their way to fuck it up like this. Pathetic.

Yes, I thought that I didn’t need you with me anymore.

So, yeah, Isa doesn’t give a shit about Skuld. They can’t even force him to seem like he cares. On the other hand, Isa sure had TONS to say about Lea in this story. I’m not surprised that there’s all this subtext hinting that Isa really loved Lea. That’s my favorite part about this story. It’s just so gay. Isa said his life had no meaning if Lea didn’t need him. Lea was his purpose.

“Kairi…? Oh, I expect she’s catching up with her friend from the darkness,” he said as if it were nothing of much concern.

“What’s that mean?!” Sora demanded.

“She doesn’t need you anymore.” Saïx smiled, but the expression didn’t reach his eyes.

It just makes me even more pissed off over how badly KH3 ruined Isa. There was so much wasted potential with the LeaIsa relationship. IMO, it’s still the most complicated and interesting relationship in the series. At least before KH3, anyway.

Ultimately, what is a heart?

What are friends?

Is there any meaning to making connections with your heart?

I’m not blaming the writer of this story or anything. They did the best they could with the cruddy source material. But I gotta be honest, this story still sounds like it’s written from Saïx’s point of view, not Isa’s. He just sounds so…robotic? If that makes sense. Like, he still doesn’t sound fully human here, if you ask me.

It was just that if he went back and reported that he couldn’t find anything, he would have to deal with those attempts at “personality”—the sneers, the snide remarks, the only trappings of human emotion that Saïx ever showed. Not that Saïx was even capable of annoyance or disappointment, of course, what with the lack of a heart and all.

Saïx was very, very cold and unfeeling. He couldn’t understand friendship or what it meant to have a heart.

In a way, Saïx put more effort than any of them into pretending he had a heart, Axel thought. And yet, he was more lacking than any of them.

He was the most Nobody-like organization member. There was a distinct lack of humanity with his personality. He didn’t even want to be that way. He desperately wanted a heart so he could feel like a normal human again. He was a tragic character. A victim. But…there was clearly something very, very wrong with him. He was NOT normal. And this never gets addressed. It really bothers me.

“I know I won’t forget you. Believe me, I try all the time,” Isa replied with a bit of humor in his tone.

“See? I’m immortal!”

“You’re obnoxious.”

I gotta say, I don’t like how Isa is now being written like Saïx, as if that was just his natural personality. In BBS, Isa actually seemed VERY sensitive. He simply seemed reticent with his feelings. He seemed like he had very strong affection for Lea, but was too shy to express this outwardly. So he teased Lea all the time.

Lea seemed to understand that Isa’s teasing was simply his way of showing affection, so he enjoyed their banter. A lot. Although Isa was shy, he still gave me the impression that he was a totally normal kid, like Lea. He had a good sense of humor and acted playful. He didn’t seem to be so…stiff or unable to understand emotions like he does in this story.

Talking to Roxas and Xion always brings back memories of my human life, back when I was a kid. It’s a weird sensation. I ought to be able to share all this with Saïx, but I just don’t feel like it anymore. It’s strange, but I’m content with just missing what’s gone. I’m not the one who changed. You did.

Lea was a normal human kid. Axel was a normal Nobody. Isa was a normal kid. Saïx was NOT a normal Nobody. So why would Isa be so different from Lea? IMO, there’s no good explanation for why Isa changed from a normal shy kid in BBS to what he became as a Nobody. This…unfeeling blob of a man. At least a backstory as a human test subject would make his personality understandable.

“Say something. Have you even thought that maybe I can’t erase Roxas?” Axel said, in a playful tone, and Saix finally looked up.

“It’ll be all right. ‘Cause I’m tough.” Axel puffed out his chest.

“How stupid,” said Saix, and for a moment he smiled.

It feels like KH3 had to sugarcoat Saïx a lot, in order to portray him more sympathetically. Saïx had a few moments where he showed genuine emotion and love for Axel (feelings that I don’t even think were his). He acted shy in this scene, for instance. He acted more Like Isa here. But generally, it was very, VERY hard to get anything out of him, no matter how hard Axel tried to connect with him.

After a while I became selfish, and turned into a foolish person.

I cannot say enough how much I loathe how KH3 handled Saïx. He was deprived of all the complexity and sympathy he could have had if he had been an abuse victim and human test subject. And at the same time, they also had to try and whitewash his character in order to redeem him. KH3 writes Saïx as just this normal guy who is a bit bad with expressing his feelings and as a result, acted selfish when he lost his heart. His personality as a Nobody was just an extension of his personality as a human.

Saïx: He won nothing and is nothing. He couldn’t stand the emptiness of being without a heart, and that led to his demise. He was foolish and weak.

But that’s just not true. Saïx wasn’t just a bit brusque. He was a monster. His moniker was “Demoniac Dancing in the Moon”. He was demonic. There’s no need to downplay this. He was not just this tsundere guy who just needed to apologize for being a bit douchey. He was savage and acted downright evil much of the time. Being bad with emotions doesn’t even begin to describe him. Nor does it explain why he acted the way he did, especially with Axel.

Saïx: All I did was find a place to send everyone who was getting in the way.

Axel: Well, it’s nice to know where I stand! Sheesh…

Saïx: Did you come back in one piece or didn’t you?

For instance, it’s never explained WHY Saïx pushed Axel away in the first place. In KH3, they’d have you believe that all the problems started when he became jealous of Axel’s closeness with Roxas and Xion. But that’s obviously not true. Saïx was messed up long before Axel got close to them. And the only reason Axel spent all his time with them was because Saïx had already changed and pushed him away constantly. There’s no explanation given for why Saïx acted so cold with Axel all the time. None.

In canon, Saïx’s personality just makes NO SENSE. Why did he abuse Axel if he felt like Axel gave his life meaning? It wasn’t just because he had no heart, because Axel didn’t have one, other. And if they both loved each other, they should have been able to grow hearts rather easily, anyways. So why did Saïx have such a black hole for a heart? In KH3, they’d have you believe that that’s just how he was. It was just his flawed personality and possibly him being upset that Axel wasn’t as obsessed with finding Subject X as he was. Not because his heart was swallowed by Xehanort’s after he was a human test subject.

Yes, I thought you didn’t need me anymore. If you didn’t need me, then I no longer held meaning. That’s why I sacrificed myself to that man.

He said he sacrificed himself to Xehanort because Axel didn’t need him anymore. But what I wanna know is, why he thought that! Axel never pushed Saïx away. Ever! He tried and tried and tried to get close to him. But Saïx always pushed Axel away. I hate how KH3 almost makes it seem like Saïx was justified to feel abandoned by Axel and hate him. I think that’s totally unfair to Axel. He did everything he could for Saïx. Axel almost killed Roxas and Xion for Saïx’s sake. And Saïx was never grateful to him or anything.

You’re ultimately still a crybaby, but you don’t need the marks anymore.

Saïx’s personality in KH3 just feels so random to me. In canon, there’s just no depth or substance to him as a character. He’s just this weird guy who is really bad with his emotions. I swear, there was so much more going on with him that was left on the cutting room floor. Like, why does he call Lea a crybaby? What is that all about? I have my theories, but still. Nothing about Axel and Saïx’s canon backstory made any sense. It pisses me off so much.

[lisatelramor]

Just a Blind Date

I wrote this in December and keep forgetting to post it =__=;;; So here, KH fic. I’m not usually a Xion/Roxas shipper but I do find it cute. So yeah. Fic. Have it.

*****

“I’m still not comfortable with this,” Roxas said as Lea held up different shirts in front of him. “You should just call your friend and cancel this.”

“Oh relax a little, Rox,” Lea said. He tossed the shirts away. “You said you wanted to have fun and do something new. So live a little.”

“When I said that I meant, I dunno, picking up a new hobby, not you arranging a blind date,” he grumbled. “You’re not even telling me if it’s with a girl or a boy.”

“Does it matter?”

“Not really, but you know what I mean. What if we have nothing to talk about? I don’t even know what to try and brace myself for.”

“All the better. You get way too defensive when you overthink things.” Lea threw up his hands. “Do you own any shirts that aren’t gray, black or white?”

“What’s wrong with black and white?”

“It makes you look colorblind and boring,” Lea said, hands on his hips.

“We can’t all pull of yellow and red and orange,” Roxas said tugging on Lea’s favorite scarf. It was kind of awful. He wondered why he was letting Lea help him with fashion. Sora arguably had better taste. “Besides, you wear almost as much black as I do.”

“I know the value of color accents.” He plucked up one of the black shirts with a gray pattern that went silvery at points. “Well, this is gonna have to do. Next time you have a date, I’m taking you shopping.”

“Well I’m not letting you set up another date for me ever,” Roxas said with a roll of his eyes. He slid the shirt on and supposed it did look okay with the jeans Lea had shoved at him because ‘he should wear something form flattering’ for once. Lea needed to have less issue with baggy clothing because baggy clothing was comfortable.

“Hair and makeup next,” Lea insisted.

“Woah, hey, I never agreed to makeup.”

Lea held up eyeliner and mascara. “You’re blond. This’ll make your eyes stand out. Trust me.”

Said Lea, the guy that wore winged eyeliner and dyed his hair fire-truck red because it made him stand out. Ugh.

“Make it quick. I just want to get this whole thing over with.”

Lea snorted and held him still. “You’re so over dramatic.”

“I’m the dramatic one?”

“Uh, yeah. Who had an epic month of tantrums when Sora started spending more time with his friends than with you?”

“I was twelve!”

Lea stuck out his tongue. “Still stands.” He sprayed a bit of hair mousse on his hand and ran it through Roxas’s hair, before tilting his face from side to side. “Hm. You clean up well enough I guess.”

“Wow, thanks,” Roxas said, snorting. He turned to the mirror, grudgingly acknowledging that Lea did have some idea about what he was doing. He didn’t look bad, and the makeup wasn’t as noticeable as Leah’s was.

“Brown pencil,” Lea said when he noted Roxas examining his eyes. “Black would be too dark for you.”

“But not for you?”

“My whole image is built on bold, high contrast,” he said. “I want it to stand out.”

Roxas snorted again. “I’d thank you but like, I’m still not happy you put me in this position in the first place.”

“It’ll be fine.” Lea slapped his back. “So your date’s going to be waiting in the station plaza just outside the clock tower.”

“All the way over there?”

“They like sea salt ice cream and nice views,” Lea continued. “There, now you know something.”

“So what, you decided to pair us up because we have the same taste in ice cream?”

“Just go have fun,” Lea said. “There’s supposed to be a movie going on in town sponsored by the ice cream place.”

“If that’s where you pictured us having the date, why the heck are we meeting at the clock tower?”

“It’s a nice view,” Lea said. He pushed Roxas toward the door. “See ya, don’t want to see you back here until at least eight o’clock. If I find out you stood your date up, we’re having words.”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever. See ya Lea.”

Lea shut the door in his face.

Roxas rolled his eyes and headed for the clock tower.

o*O*o

There were a few people milling around, coming and going from the train station, but none of them were the date Lea set him up on. Lea did have a point about the view though. It was a lot nicer when you could manage to sneak to the top of the clock tower, but Central Station was up on a hill above most of the town meaning you could see most of Twilight Town from here even without climbing the tower. It showed off the golden colors of the sunset really well, granted that the sun never went up or down it meant less than it might in other places he supposed.

There wasn’t anyone standing near the station doors, but there was someone leaning against the railing in the plaza, looking out into the distance. Roxas was willing to bet that was the right person. Well, unless whoever it was decided it was more trouble than it was worth and had backed out.

Roxas wouldn’t blame them if they did.

The person by the railing was a girl, and Lea had no right complaining about Roxas’s color preferences because she had a black shirt and gray skirt on. Her hair was short, almost boyish, and when he walked closer, he supposed she was kind of pretty. Roxas was more into people than looks. (Although sometimes he questioned what he liked in people because that few years with a crush on Lea were kind of questionable. Even more questionable than the kind-of-sort-of hate-crush on Riku he’d had at thirteen. At least Riku was pretty instead of spiky and bony like Lea. And a bit closer in age. Roxas’s brain was a bit weird in what it latched onto sometimes.)

He walked over to the girl and leaned on the railing a bit away, just far enough to hopefully not seem creepy.

“So, uh, nice view?” he said, trying to think of a way to subtly ask if she was the person he was meeting with.

“Isn’t it?” the girl said. “It’s so warm here. The colors and the temperature. It’s so much nicer than home.”

“Oh?”

“Gray. All the time.” She turned a bit and gave Roxas a smile, and oh, she was pretty. Not that she wasn’t before, but the smile met her eyes and that genuine enthusiasm for a view he saw all the time made his heart beat a little bit faster.

Roxas bit his lip. “Um, so, possibly strange question. You know a guy called Lea?”

The girl blinked and smiled a bit wider. “Yeah. I know a Lea. Six foot something, red hair, jokes a lot?”

“That’s the guy.”

She laughed. “So you must be my date.” She held out a hand. “My name’s Xion.”

“Roxas.” He was weirdly nervous shaking her hand. It was silly; this was a blind date that neither of them had to make mean something at all. Just another weird whim from Lea after hearing Roxas complain one too many times about being bored.

“Well, Roxas, it’s nice to meet you.”

o*O*o

Roxas wasn’t really sure what to make of her at first, but after a few minutes exchanging stories about how they ended up friends with Lea—Roxas meeting him when he left the Islands, and Xion during one of Lea’s spontaneous travel phases—it turned out that they actually knew a lot of the same people and were even going to the same university. They just frequented different parts of campus and town so far as Roxas could tell.

They were going to go to the movie, really, but somehow talking about friends lead to Roxas remembering Pence dragging him and the rest of Hayner’s group around the other side of Twilight Town to check out the so-called Seven Wonders for a mythology report, and the next thing Roxas knew they were on a train to go see them now. He was having a lot better time than he thought he would.

“I wonder how many places have local legends like this,” Xion said as they counted up and down the stairs multiple times—counting the same every time, of course.

“I dunno. Probably a lot though.”

“Did your Islands have any legends?”

“Hmm, probably.” Roxas skipped down the stairs toward the next spot, considering. “I think there were a few stories my mom told us growing up, and my brother’s friend Riku’s grandma always had the best stories about faraway places. Probably why he wanted to leave so much growing up honestly. There was a story about a kid that opened a door to another world, but that one was kind of sad since he never came back. There were stories like that, the kind that are probably cautionary tales or something. Like the kid that built a raft to sail to the stars and instead got swallowed by the ocean.”

“Wow,” Xion said. “Grim stuff.”

“Right? You’d think there’d be more sunshine and flowers for a tropical island.” Roxas grinned, peeking into the alley. No balls got thrown his way, but then no one had been practicing here lately since it was months until the next Struggle competition. “This one’s supposed to be a ‘Friend From Beyond the Wall,’ but it turned out that this is a place people practice with Struggle balls, so that was another Wonder crossed off the list.”

Xion peered into the alley. “And people missed that there was someone in there?”

“I never said they were good Wonders. I think Pence had to be chasing any rumor he could or something.”

“Well, most rumors have a grain of truth,” Xion reasoned.

“Yeah, yeah, but it was still really random. Like. How is mysteriously number changing stairs a Wonder?”

“It would certainly be strange if it was true.”

They walked away, Roxas leading toward the waterfall. “I guess,” he said after a moment, “there was one neat story. Or, well, maybe it was more of a superstition than a story.” Xion looked at him and he felt self-conscious bringing it up because, well, it was one that actually meant something to him and Sora growing up. “There’s this fruit, ok, shaped like a star. The legend goes that if you share it with someone you care about, your lives and destinies will be entwined. So you’ll always find your way back to each other.” He scrubbed his hair, messing up Lea’s careful styling. “It’s a little cheesy, but…”

“I think it’s pretty cute,” Xion said. “Do you believe it?”

“I dunno.” He shrugged. “I never shared one with anyone. My brother though, Sora, he shared one with his friends Riku and Kairi, and they all ended up going to study in Radiant Garden together, so maybe there’s some sort of truth to it. Or maybe it’s just taking it seriously and working harder to keep up bonds, I don’t know.”

“Maybe it’s both,” Xion suggested. “Belief can go a long way.”

“How about your home? Were there any legends there?”

“Mm.” Xion shrugged. “Not any happy ones.”

Roxas got the feeling she didn’t like her home much. Any question that glanced by the topic was met with a non-answer and a distant look. He could take a hint though, so he just tugged her over to the waterfall.

“Well, this Wonder is a doppelganger. But…” He took a step to the right where the sun hit just right to make the water show their reflections. “I’m pretty sure a mirror effect isn’t an actual doppelganger.”

“Still pretty cool. I didn’t know a waterfall could work as a mirror.” Xion made faces at herself and Roxas snorted. “What? Like you’ve never done it.”

“Actually my brother and I get into face contests all the time.” Roxas grinned before pulling the ridiculous face that Sora always complained was not nearly as silly as his signature silly face. Roxas totally had the better expression.

Xion burst out laughing. “You look like you don’t have a chin!”

“Right?” She made a face and he made one back until they were leaning against each other and gasping for breath.

“Owwww,” Xion giggled. “I can’t breathe!”

“Do I win or do you?”

“We both win because neither of us can stand upright,” she said, rubbing at the stitch in her side. “Okay, no more faces. I don’t think I can take more laughing.”

“Next Wonder?”

“Please.”

Roxas didn’t even think twice about taking her hand and leading her up the hill. “Okay,” he said once he had his breath mostly back. “This one’s a bit weird. So the Wonder is a bag that moves on its own.”

“A bag. Like…a trash bag?”

“Kinda?”

Xion snorted. “A living trash bag is a wonder.”

“I know, right?” They crested the hill and Xion grabbed his hand tight.

“Ohmygosh, is that it?”

In the middle of the hill was a moving bag all right.

Roxas groaned. “Really? Again? C’mon help me catch it.”

“Catch it?”

Rather than explain, Roxas moved to cut the randomly moving bag off. Xion, confused but willing to help, blocked the other direction. Between the two of them, they caught the bag in less than a minute, Roxas half tacking it to pin it down. And out came a dog with a bit of tugging along with a mess of garbage.

“This dumb mutt keeps getting stuck in bags. I have no idea how it ends up here half the time, but it’s not very bright.”

The dog whined and wiggled and tried to crawl right back into the garbage. Roxas held the bag out of reach.

“Oh no you don’t. What is even wrong with you?”

“He’s really cute,” Xion said. “But kind of…smelly.”

“Yeah, not the brightest dog at all. C’mon, go home. Your owner’s gonna blow a gasket when they find you covered in garbage again.”

As if realizing that Roxas was in no way, shape, or form going to give it the garbage back, the dog gave a huff of breath and slunk off, casting disgruntled looks over its shoulder.

“I can’t believe we pulled a dog from a bag of garbage,” Xion said. “You know, this wasn’t where I pictured this date going.”

Oh. Right. They were on a date. Roxas blushed. It was kind of weird but it felt like they’d been friends for a while, not two people that just met a little over an hour ago. He took the trash to a garbage can, trying not to get flustered again. “Well, it’s a unique date then. Can’t say anyone else would take you to a hill and have you chase a garbage dog.”

Xion snickered. “Yeah, somehow I don’t think most people would find that romantic.”

“Do you?” Roxas blurted before he could think twice about words coming out of his mouth.

She gave him a slow, considering look. “It’s kind of out there, but this is one of the better dates I’ve been on honestly.”

“Oh.” He blushed again. “Well. I’m, uh, glad then.” Wow, so smooth. Lea would be laughing his ass of if he was here. “So, one more Wonder, since we’re here?”

Xion nodded obligingly.

Roxas pointed at the rail that went off in the distance. “They say that there’s a ghost train that you can sometimes see. No one knows where it goes, but it doesn’t belong to any of the train lines in Twilight Town.”

“Is it real?” Xion asked.

“It’s said to only be seen at sunset.”

It took a moment but then Xion frowned. “Wait, isn’t Twilight Town…”

“Constantly in twilight?” Roxas said with a grin. “Kinda. It’s… I don’t know if you noticed, but the sun moves a little. There’s like ‘edges of dawn and edges of dusk’ twilight and then there’s the golden sunrise-set state most of the time. Pretty sure it’s the edges of dusk kind of twilight that the myth means, but who knows? Maybe the train just shows up at random.”

“Huh. Seems like a cheap way to leave it to chance.”

“Right?” He smiled, looking out at the golden glow. It was edging toward redder, more evening technically now. He was never going to get used to how Twilight Town’s sky worked. “I saw it once though.”

“Yeah?”

“Yep. Standing right here. It was all weird, like someone who only read fantasy novels tried to design a train. My bet? That train’s someone’s private rail line and they come to town every now and then, but it’s so infrequent it’s just become a legend.”

“Huh.” Xion tilted her head. “You know it would be cooler if it was actually owned by a wizard.”

“Might as well be. Not like we’re ever going to know.”

Xion hummed and leaned against the rail. The view was nice here too.

“You ever thought of photography?” he asked after a while of watching clouds turn red and gold and light cast dappled shadows down below. “To make the image last.”

“Thought about it,” Xion said, “but it wouldn’t feel right. I could take pictures and catch a tiny fragment of what it was, but it’d only just be that fragment. I’d rather have the memory of something real and in the moment than create something that can never catch the whole of it, you know?”

It seemed a bit of a waste, because the picture could prompt the memory, but at the same time he kind of got it. There was something even more beautiful about a sight knowing that it was the only time you’d get to see it. “I guess.”

They stood shoulder to shoulder for a long while until the golds in the sky were almost all reds and oranges.

“Is that all the Wonders of Twilight Town?” Xion asked, finally, completely relaxed beside him.

“There’s two more, some sounds from the tunnels and an abandoned mansion that people say they’ve seen a ghost girl in, but we don’t have to go see them if you don’t want to.”

Xion nudged him with her elbow. “I think we’ve done pretty well so far. Might as well see the rest.”

Roxas rubs the back of his head. “If you’re up to it. The tunnels…don’t exactly smell the greatest.”

“I’m not afraid of dark places and some garbage,” Xion said. “Besides, I think I’m getting a lot better tour of obscure places of Twilight Town than most people get.”

“I don’t think most people would want to stumble around the tunnel system or weird alleys.”

“Their loss.” Xion tossed him a wink and walked confidently toward the tunnels

Roxas laughed.

“Welcome,” he said as they stepped into the tunnels, “to the Underground Concourse, a lovely system of tunnels allowing you to get almost anywhere in Twilight Town without the hassle of dealing with busy streets.” He gave a pretentious little bow. “As you can see, it houses garbage, litter, used cigarette butts and various vermin.” As if on cue, a startled mouse skittered past.

“How charming,” Xion said.

“It’s really not that bad, just no one’s been through to clean lately. It happens a couple times a year and people are kinda slobs.” A soda can rattled away as he accidentally kicked it. “I wasn’t kidding about avoiding people though. Sometimes I cut through the tunnels if I need to get somewhere faster.”

“So what’s the legend here?”

“People say that if you walk the tunnels, you can hear the groans of some poor soul that got lost down here and never made it back out.” His grin glinted in the low light and Roxas led her to the ideal spot. “If you listen closely, you might hear them today.”

They stopped and there was a soft moaning sound. Xion raised an eyebrow. Roxas remembered Lea looking unnerved by the noise the first time he’d been down there, but Xion didn’t even look fazed. “So what is it really?”

“What, no belief in poor wayward souls?”

“I can’t imagine a ghost haunting someplace like this. It’s just not spooky enough.”

“Fair enough.” Roxas pointed up where there was an air vent. “As far as Pence could figure out, the sound’s caused by the vents. When it gets windy they make noise. Not very scary once you learn that.”

“It’s not that scary in the first place. A little dirty, but I’ve seen worse.” She smiled. “So, leave the not-so-haunted tunnels for the possibly-haunted mansion?”

“Right this way.” There used to be a hole in a wall kids climbed through on dares to creep close to the old mansion, but these days the only way to reach it was through the tunnels. One led outside the town walls into a forest, and so they climbed out into bushes and trees a few minutes later.

“Oh, hey, nature.”

“Yep. As nice as the town is, it’s good to get out of it and around trees sometimes. The mansion’s on the other end of the forest. If you can call it a forest. It’s not big enough to get lost in.”

“Close enough.” Xion touched a green leaf. “I’m finding the best places today.”

“I do know the best places.” He pushed through the undergrowth, the path a bit more overgrown than the last time he’d been through here. “Okay, I have friends who are from here and know all the best places. Still.”

“Well thank goodness for those friends.”

“I’ll have to introduce you. You’d probably get along with them. Actually you might have even seen them around; Hayner and Olette work for that new fancy restaurant down town.”

“You’ll have to point them out.”

The mansion gates loomed out of the clearing beyond the woods with its slightly-rusty blackened metal and worn brick walls. Stone pillars that might have been a part of a trellis system at one point were crumbling in the lawn and the mansion itself looked sad, like it was drooping, though that might just possibly be a roof problem. On one side was a big picture window on the second story, with curtains still visibly hanging.

“Well, there it is.” Roxas looked up at the building, feeling the same uneasy feeling he’d had back when he visited here with Pence. Pence swore he’d been in it once, and that it was a bunch of trashed rooms and a slightly-less-trashed library. He’d never felt brave enough to enter himself. “They say that sometimes there’s a girl that stands in the window and watches the world outside. No one’s lived here in over a decade though, so unless there’s been a squatter in the meantime, it’s not very likely there’s a girl there.

“It looks lonely,” Xion said. “Do you know what happened to the people that lived here?”

“No. Pence never mentioned, though he might know. He was the one doing the research report on it…”

They looked up at the mansion a few more minutes before Xion said, “Can you go in it?”

“Technically I think the lock is either broken or apparently really easy to pick, but I’ve never wanted to go in.”

“Really?” Xion asked, surprise clear on her face. “Not even once?”

“I don’t really believe in ghosts, but there’s something about this place that just… Gives me the heebie jeebies.” Roxas shrugged. “Pence says the first floor is really dusty and some of the rooms are trashed. There’s a library somewhere though and it’s really dusty but mostly in one piece I guess. Unless rats are nesting in it since the last time he broke in.”

“Well clearly I have to meet your friend so we can break in together.”

“Why would you want to go in?”

“Adventure,” Xion said. “Duh.” She grinned to make it clear she was teasing. “That’s kind of why I wanted to see all the Wonders in the first place, you know?”

“I guess I can see that.”

They looked at the mansion a bit longer and Roxas could almost swear the curtain moved. But for all he knew there was a mouse or a crack in the window that caused a draft. He shook himself. It was getting late. “So… I hear you like sea salt ice cream?”

Xion’s eyes lit up. “I love sea salt ice cream.”

“My treat?” he offered.

“This time,” she said. “Next time, I’ll treat you.”

“So there’s going to be a next time?”

Xion nudged him with her elbow. “I’ve been having fun. And if you’re not into me romantically, I’d love to be friends.”

Roxas blushed. “Yeah, I’d like. Um, I’d like that too. And. You’re pretty cool all around.” Pretty cool? What was coming out of his mouth?

Xion didn’t seem to care that it was awkward though since she just smiled again.

o*O*o

The rest of the date was spent talking over melting bars of sea salt ice cream back at Station Plaza until they really had to go because it was getting pretty late to be out. Roxas walked Xion to her district in Twilight Town, and even screwed up the courage to kiss her cheek. Xion one-upped him and gave him a return kiss that had Roxas grinning the whole way home to his and Lea’s apartment.

Lea took one look and grinned right back, smug. “See?” he said. “I told you it’d work out. Am I the best or am I the best.”

“Shut up, you’re maybe second best.” But Roxas couldn’t even manage a scowl.

“Date was that good then?” Lea wiggled his eyebrows.

“We didn’t even go to the movie or get dinner,” Roxas said. “We did get ice cream. But it was a lot of fun.”

“You going to go out again?”

“Well, she promised to buy me ice cream next time so I’ll take that as a yes.” Roxas also had Xion’s phone number in his phone now.

Lea smiled, looking like a proud older brother for a second. “You managed a date successfully. You’re growing up so fast.”

“Ha ha, very funny.”

Roxas flopped back on his bed, already thinking of what texts he could send Xion’s way. He glanced at Lea’s smile. “Thanks though,” he said. “Really. Even if nothing else works out, I think Xion could be a good friend someday.”

“Don’t mention it.” Lea waved a hand. “Really. Now, will you buy me a bar of ice cream next time in thanks or…?”

Roxas rolled his eyes. “Sure, Lea. I’ll buy you ice cream sometime.”

“Score.”

Roxas snapped a photo of Lea’s smug face and sent it to Xion with the caption ‘guess who’s getting a swelled ego’.

He got back a laugh emoji and a ‘tell him thanks’.

Roxas did eventually pass along her message. But not until he’d spent another half hour exchanging messages. Couldn’t have Lea thinking he was that good of a matchmaker. Even if, in this case at least, Roxas thought he really might be right.

[marshmallowgoop]

Doing yearly writing reviews isn’t really a thing. But once you start doing ‘em, it doesn’t feel right to stop, you know?

Seeing progress in other arts is of course a lot easier than seeing progress in writing, but I think there is some forward movement for me, especially when I also consider my compilations from 2017 and 2018.

In regards to 2019, I’ve selected various kinds of writing for this post: analytical essays, opinion pieces, news articles, creative fiction, and maybe some works that can’t be categorized so easily, too. It was a very difficult year on many fronts; I dealt with job struggles, financial insecurity, destroyed relationships, medical hardships, seemingly endless cyberstalking and online harassment. 

But there were good things, too. New friendships. New passions. New outlooks. I feel like I’ve learned and grown a lot more in these past couple of months than I have in a long, long time.

The end of 2019 is more than just the end of one year. It’s also the end of a decade. But I think the best advice I’ve received all decade comes from this year:

✄ Sometimes, you have to say yes to saying no.

✄ If you can’t do something well, do something poorly!

✄ The best option may be to simply not engage.

✄ You don’t have to apologize for disappointing others.

✄ Your worth isn’t measured by how much you “accomplish.”

✄ You have rights: the right to have your needs and wants respected, the right to make mistakes, the right to determine your own priorities, the right to not be responsible for the actions or problems of others, the right to express yourself, the right to be human. It’s not selfish or narcissistic to stand up for your rights.

And, since it is the end of the decade and all, here’s also a comparison between one nerdy fandom essay from August 2010 and another from August 2019:

2010 (with added spaces because yes, this really was just a huge block of text originally):

Also, in my own opinion, nobody really gave a damn for Xion all that much save for Roxas. I mean, yeah, Axel cared a little, but in the end, he got totally mad at her, got mad any time she was mentioned, got mad whenever Roxas worried about her, got mad when she showed up at the clock tower. She was his friend, yeah, and he didn’t want her to go, but in the end, he would have chosen Roxas above her anytime.

The other “mean villains” didn’t really care. Luxord didn’t care, Demyx didn’t care, Xaldin got exasperated once at her, but overall didn’t care, Xigbar didn’t care, Xemnas outright said he didn’t care, Saix was rather cruel to her, but really, in the end, he didn’t give a damn for her. The others weren’t around long enough to have an impression on her. I think even Riku didn’t really care all that much for her, in all honesty. He just wanted his best friend back.  

Also, you have to keep in mind that we played the game through Roxas’ perspective, and it’s in my personal belief that he fell in love with Xion. And if you’re in love with someone, when she gets into a coma, or goes missing, or ignores you, you’re gonna be upset, and talk about it. So Roxas did. 

But you know, he doesn’t actually do a lot of it until the end of the game. Before that, it’s all about the THREE of them. He loves his friends (even if he doesn’t know it), and he wants them to be together forever, but when Xion goes missing or whatnot and they can’t ALL have ice cream together, he gets upset.

2019: 

I’ve written more on the subject here, but to keep it short, Ryuko only tries to take Nui’s life when she’s convinced herself that she’s a monster, and her development is less about her becoming less okay with killing people and more about how she won’t let her anger and rage control her. What makes Ryuko’s attitude so different in the end isn’t that she’s reconsidered her thoughts on murder but that she’s composed. Come episode 22, Ryuko ain’t saying that she’s gonna kill anyone to sound tough or to intimidate. She keeps her cool even against her worst enemies.

But that’s just what I think! Maybe I’ve interpreted the character all wrong. But Ryuko’s freak-out after she goes berserk and hurts others in episode 12, her devotion to defending even people she’s just met… I just struggle to see her as someone who’s actually a-okay with killing. The fact that Ryuko’s perfect fantasy in episode 20 depicts her as a sweet girl without any of the violent tendencies that she has in reality also points this way; not to mention, Ryuko outright admits that her picking fights and causing trouble are bad things when remarking on her childhood in episode 8.

And Ryuko? She doesn’t want to be bad. All the poor girl’s ever wanted is love, and I can’t imagine she’d ever think that getting angry and killing people would get her a lot of that.

Progress may be slow, but it does happen.

At least, I think so.

Image Texts

January 2019

And personally? I find that sweetness just absolutely, utterly charming. When I understood what the rap was trying to communicate, I couldn’t imagine listening to the song without it. Heck, even before I understood, I found the “without rap” edits empty and barren. No matter how “silly” the lyrics might come off, the unabashed cheese is fantastic. The rap section that I was once “meh” about legitimately became my favorite part of the song.

Plus, I really can’t stress enough how sad the song is when it’s purely Ryuko. The official [nZk] remix replaces Senketsu’s rap with a reprise of Ryuko’s first verse, which recounts how she and Senketsu met. And it’s tragic! She says, “But I’m all alone,” and she is. Senketsu isn’t singing with her, no matter her claim that she can hear his voice. Considering what happens to Senketsu in the end, his absence in the song hits even harder.

Full post: https://marshmallowgoop.tumblr.com/post/182361051017/oomoj-marshmallowgoop-the-rap-is-good

February 2019

The focus then shifts away from Ragyo, but Kill la Kill ain’t at all done with building the audience up yet. As the scene moves to the following day, viewers are met with quick, close-up shots of Uzu’s note to Ryuko, timed right to the beat of “Blumenkranz.” Uzu wants to duel, and we soon get to see his full request in an engaging low-angle shot where Ryuko looks up to this sign looming over her. The weight and gravity of the situation is effectively conveyed: the smooth transition from Ragyo to here, as well as the music and shot composition, let us know in no indirect terms that this fight isn’t something to be brushed off. Uzu’s duel is a big deal, and it’s very much connected to Ragyo’s expansive empire.

And the tension just keeps growing. Ryuko’s reaction to Uzu’s note is presented with a dramatic canted, high-angle shot. The camera—which is just slightly tilted—peers down at both Ryuko and the sign, communicating a sense of danger and unease. Viewers already know that the upcoming battle is important, but here, we also understand that it’s not going to be easy.

Full post: https://marshmallowgoop.tumblr.com/post/182841724817/all-the-discussion-around-episode-6-of-kill-la

March 2019

Kill la Kill the Game: IF is currently being featured at the 2019 Game Developers Conference that runs until March 22nd in San Francisco, and a flurry of new gameplay videos are now available for viewing. Notably, these videos feature full English subtitles for the character dialogue for the first time since EVO 2018 last year and never-before-seen stages, such as what seems to be the Fiber Castle in the Kiryuin Manor.

Full post: https://marshmallowgoop.tumblr.com/post/183766224117/kill-la-kill-the-game-if-gameplay-footage-from

April 2019

I mean, Kill la Kill ended over five years ago now. There’s been fairly minimal new content ever since—an OVA in September of 2014, a few pieces of merchandise here and there, a small crossover with Grand Summoners last year. And then, not even 11 months ago, out of seemingly nowhere, there was confirmation for a full-blown Kill la Kill video game. That we now know will be released in just 14 weeks!

Lots of jokes were made about the announcement for a game so many years after the series finale, but, like, seriously, as a longtime Kill la Kill fan, it’s hard to wrap my head around. Ever since the show ended, I’ve dedicated over half a million words to writing about it, spent tens of thousands of yen on books and Blu-rays and CDs, devoted nearly 60 GB to my own GIFs and edits. I’ve loved this thing to death. I’ve always found more and more that I want to write and create from this series, but I never really imagined nor expected that we’d ever get much more official content from the original creators themselves. And now we are getting so much more, and???

Full post: https://marshmallowgoop.tumblr.com/post/184228103137/kill-la-kill-the-game-if-releases-on-july-25th-in

May 2019

Kiznaiver: Oh, I was so excited to love this show! I was lucky enough to see an advanced screening of the first two episodes, and I was totally hooked. It was drop-dead gorgeous—and probably the prettiest series Trigger has ever put out—and I was very intrigued by the plot and characters. I remember just coming back to my hotel room at like 3:00 am after the premiere, utterly filled with excitement. I mean, Kiznaiver  was directed by Hiroshi Kobayashi, the episode director behind the two episodes that got me hooked on Kill la Kill (episodes 5 and 18)!

But… my excitement quickly died. The story tried to develop way too many characters in way too little time, and I never enjoyed the romantic pairing of Katsuhira and Noriko, finding it shallow, undeveloped, and nonsensical (in a bad way), which… kind of ruins a lot of the series when that’s arguably the heart of the whole thing.

Kiznaiver is still super, super pretty, though. That last episode’s animation got me shook.

Full post: https://marshmallowgoop.tumblr.com/post/184700944732/so-have-you-watched-the-other-stuff-studio-trigger

June 2019

I do recognize that many, many matters do not warrant conversation. I do recognize that the phrase “I’m just trying to have a conversation” can be—and has been—utilized as a means of directing criticism away from inflammatory, unacceptable, inhumane remarks. I in no way feel that hateful, discriminatory comments should be promoted.

Simultaneously, however, “conversation” should not automatically be a dirty word in the field of analyzing and seriously engaging with fiction, and thoughtful reactions should be supported and striven for. Nothing in fiction is ever black and white. There are so many nuances and complexities to the storybook realities of our media. I want commentators and critics of fiction to be passionate about listening, considering, and rethinking those nuances and complexities. Isn’t that why we do this work at all? To share our own point of view and open ourselves up to others?

Full post: https://marshmallowgoop.tumblr.com/post/185289615202/we-need-to-change-the-way-we-seriously-discuss

July 2019

Initially, I was really bummed by this lack of development. But as I thought about things more, I… didn’t mind so much. If this dream or universe or whatever is something that Satsuki “experiences” before the events of the anime, of course she won’t grow as a character here. Maybe this game is kind of the Kill la Kill prequel I’ve been begging for for over half a decade.

And as much as I didn’t get anything, I thought the ending bits between Ryuko and Satsuki were so good.

Like, I suppose Ryuko’s absorbing the Life Fibers or something?? But wow, pretty.

And the part where they talk before Satsuki disappears? That’s my kinda anime bullshit. It’s the kinda anime bullshit I wanted from the OVA between Ryuko and Senketsu.

Full post: https://marshmallowgoop.tumblr.com/post/186648065467/goop-plays-kill-la-kill-the-game-if-satsuki

August 2019

That book, Log. 2, is a fan doujin from Kotaro Nakamori, who worked as an animator and animation director in Kill la Kill. There’s a bunch of assorted fanart in there, and I wouldn’t be at all surprised if Nakamori is a fan of Urusei Yatsura and wanted to make a little crossover between that series and Kill la Kill.

Personally, though, as someone not too familiar with Urusei Yatsura, I kinda just saw the image as oni-Satsuki (with oni being demon/ogre-like creatures in Japanese folklore). Oni are traditionally depicted wearing tiger skin loincloths, and Lum herself is definitely basically a space oni. So, I saw the cover and got super excited about oni-Satsuki because I love oni a lot, haha.

Fun fact: character designer Sushio has also drawn Kill la Kill characters as oni for setsubun, a celebration that’s held on the last day of winter (February 3rd). During setsubun, you might see folks dressed up like oni—who get beans thrown at them in an effort to bring in good luck and chase naughty demons away.

Full post: https://marshmallowgoop.tumblr.com/post/187228888187/do-i-see-satsuki-wearing-lums-outfit-in-your-last

September 2019

Though I don’t see it much anymore, I remember lots of comparisons between Ragyo and the villains of Saturday morning cartoons back in the day. She was described as a generic, two-dimensional “evilz for the sake of evilz” baddie and criticized for her simplicity.

And though I did admittedly agree to an extent—I craved a lot more depth and insight, particularly in regards to her haunting line about “still having something of a human heart” whilst brutally attacking her own daughter in the final episode—I also found Ragyo to be a remarkably compelling, powerful, and horrifying villain even without tons of backstory and explanation. Perhaps my write-up on her first scene in episode 6 best details why; this woman has such a presence, and the visual language of the series amplifies that presence spectacularly. Ragyo’s intimidating and scary without the audience even needing to know anything about her.

And… I’d say that’s a good villain. That’s exactly what a villain should do.

Full post: https://marshmallowgoop.tumblr.com/post/187987858537/on-ragyo-kiryuin

October 2019

And, though there are no visuals, so I can’t be sure if it’s an “Ocean of Light” or not, the fourth Drama CD also has the same kinda deal happening. In the CD—which takes place immediately after Ryuko learns the truth of her origins—Ryuko’s pain manifests as an explosion of light that knocks both her and Senketsu unconscious and pushes Senketsu away from her. The sound effect here is familiar, and I’m personally convinced that this is another “Ocean of Light” moment.

Which brings me to the “light” part of the terminology. Light is often associated with good, yes, but light is also associated with heat, and heat is associated with pain. In the Drama CD, Ryuko’s light is so hot that Nui even remarks that Senketsu “almost burned” from it, and when Mako embraces Ryuko after swimming through her “Ocean of Light” in episode 12, Ryuko’s touch scorches Mako’s skin.

I’ve already written an essay on the symbolic and narrative use of fire, warmth, and heat in Kill la Kill (that you should totally read because it’s actually maybe Kinda Good, Maybe), and relating to that, I see the “Ocean of Light” as a physical representation of Ryuko’s fiery spirit. That fire can be used for good, and that fire can also be painful, but no matter what, that fire is a part of Ryuko.

Full post: https://marshmallowgoop.tumblr.com/post/188247077227/i-always-wanted-some-explanation-you-are-smart

November 2019

She looks around her cottage. Her eyes find the walls and the furnishings. Her eyes find the scratched floors and stained wood. She does not voice it to the once-emperor, but she had never been able to remove the stains from the attack. Her son's blood has painted the brown wood red. It is a reminder of what she cannot remember. It is a reminder of the past she has forgotten.  

“This home feels so desperately lonely,” she admits. “I do not know who is missing. But it is not complete.”  

The man is quiet. He did not expect to find himself feeling sympathy for the woman's plight. Perhaps she is a fool, to have given her heart to a demon. But kindness ought not be punished, he thinks. Or has he grown so cold that he believes it should be?  

December 2019

🏀 Michiru and Shirou’s relationship may be the focus, but Nakashima emphasizes that Michiru’s relationship with Nazuna is also involved in the story in a big way.

🏀 Nakashima stresses the importance of depicting teen girls realistically. Two women screenwriters are on board: Kimiko Ueno and Nanami Higuchi. Both wrote for Little Witch Academia. Ueno also wrote for Space Patrol Luluco, and Higuchi was behind the production reports in Trigger Magazine (and, interestingly, wrote the script for the anime adaptation of BEASTARS).

🏀In regards to Michiru and Nazuna’s relationship, producer Naoko Tsutsumi (also an animation producer for Kiznaiver and Little Witch Academia) provides input as well. Nakashima says that they greatly value and take to heart the opinions of the women creators.

Full post: https://marshmallowgoop.tumblr.com/post/189928986922/otomedia-winter-2020-bna-brand-new-animal

[yo-namine]

Okay, time to talk to myself about Re:Mind and Limit Cut Episode. 

Spoilers galore under the cut!

I'm just gonna start off by talking about how the DLC handled my biggest gripe with base KH3, which was obviously how Kairi was written in the last few hours of the game. Like I said in my other post, Re:Mind doesn't totally fix those problems, but... Well, here's what we get:

Kairi's "murder" is reframed a bit in the DLC. Base KH3 presents it as Xehanort killing her just to provoke Sora et al. into "clashing" with him to make the final key. In Re:Mind, we learn that Xehanort was actually stowing Kairi away (by "crystallizing" her, which... means she wasn't dead? But Sora still takes all the steps Chirithy gives him that are specifically for restoring a heart from death, and it works, so...?) as a fail-safe of sorts in case he needed another Light. Xemnas foreshadows this a bit when he says that Kingdom Hearts needs the Princesses of Heart in case the whole 13 Clashes of Light and Darkness thing doesn't work out. And for what it's worth, I do think this is a little better for Kairi as a character just because it shows that she was "killed" due to something unique and special about her, rather than what she was to Sora. She's still being used, and she's still sapped of her agency, but presumably no other character could have worked in that role against Xehanort, so... that's something, I suppose.

During the Xemnas/Saix/Xion fight, there's an added scene where all the Lights get to take a shot at Xemnas, and Kairi actually broke that motherfucker's guard and made him stumble when no one else could... And then she got captured, bloop, but at least this time it was because she was actually fighting and simply got bested. I can appreciate that. I liked seeing her shield Axel from Xion's attack, too.

And of course, she does get the chance to take on Xehanort later. She has a nice battle set-up (a sort of warp dash ability similar to Riku's and Roxas's, shotlock, reflect, and a GORGEOUS link attack with Sora), and it's a little cathartic to play as her taking Xehanort down. However, I don't think she ever learns that Xehanort took her as a safety measure for his plan or why she was the one chosen for this in the first place. She doesn't speak to Xehanort at all, which makes her big battle with him at the end feel rather... impersonal? And never mind him "killing" her in KH3; Xehanort's ultimately responsible for her losing her family when she was four years old, as well as the destruction of her home world. I'm not saying Kairi and Xehanort needed to have some long overwrought conversation or anything, but there definitely should've been some dialogue between them.

Kairi's actually involved in Naminé's restoration after all!!!!!!!! I remember the Ultimania's explanation of Naminé's return leaving a bad taste in my mouth because it seemed like they framed Kairi's death as ultimately a good thing, because hey, at least her murder freed Naminé from her heart. But that's not what actually happened; instead, Kairi and Sora go to Radiant Garden at the end of the game, and she lets him use the keyblade to release Naminé's heart from hers. And honestly, that scene right there? That was probably my favorite part of this entire DLC. The fact that Kairi really did play a part in restoring her Nobody is a much better payoff to her earlier lines in the game about wanting Naminé to have her own experiences. She wanted to give Naminé her life back, and rather than that being something wrenched from Kairi against her will, it was something she did for Naminé of her own volition.  I just. 😭

/tl;dr thoughts on kairi

As for everything else in Re:Mind:

I loved the background moments with Sora and Kairi in the ending cinematic. Each one is framed so that you can't see their faces, so they all feel like you're looking in on something secret. The "Behind the Curtain" trophy name is pretty fitting (and just downright cute, lol). And like I said above, I loved the scene where Kairi and Sora restore Naminé's heart. You just see him pull the keyblade away from her chest, and then she cradles Naminé's heart in her hands and fjsldfjskd. I teared up at that. It was just such a sweet and gentle little moment. Sora and Kairi taking Chirithy to Ven (and Sora even giving them a little push, lol) was really sweet, too. I loved their body language while they watched Ven run off, how you see them turn toward each other just slightly.

I also like how Sora and Kairi's relationship evolved from "Even if we're apart, our hearts are always connected" to "Heart connections are nice and all, but I'd much rather actually be with you."

Demyx and Riku interacting was something I never knew I needed. Riku's like "PLEASE be careful with that vessel, it's very important--" and Demyx is just "Bro, I got this," and hoists it over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes.

Sora and Roxas actually talk to each other! I liked the scene where Sora's Station of Awakening starts to peel away to reveal Roxas's, and you get little glimpses of Roxas's memories. And it turns out that Sora actually did release Roxas's heart from his, and it wasn't just Xemnas kicking Xion into his chest that did the trick, lmao. I like that change.

Xemnas mentions that the original Organization doesn't remember Xion, but they do have records of her. That's a nice little tidbit to have for my Day 4 AU. 👀

Saix says the Guardians must be desperate if they're getting a Princess of Heart involved in the war, and Axel's like "Nah, she's our trump card." Aw. I also thought it was interesting how Saix purposefully uses Axel and Roxas's names to try to trigger Xion's memory of them.

I had to watch the recusant's sigil bit like four times before I understood what the hell was happening, lmao. The sigil represents the Sea Salt Trio's actual connection to one another that they had to "reclaim" from Xemnas, which... okay, but why was that needed? The thing I always liked about this trio is that they're the only one that we see develop fully from the beginning to the end of their relationship. They were always the most believable (canon) trio to me because of that, so throwing in this whole "The sigil binds us together!" thing just seems kind of stupid and unnecessary. They're friendship is good enough as-is. You don't have to add in this nonsense to represent their bond; their relationship development itself already did that. But whatever, they still had a really cool combo attack.

Scala ad Caelum is expanded on! I really enjoyed exploring it and solving the little puzzles to put Kairi's heart back together.

I LOVED THE GUARDIANS VS. NORT REPLICAS BATTLE SO MUCH I HAVE TO YELL ABOUT IT. I ACTUALLY DIED THE FIRST TIME BUT I DIDN'T CARE THAT I HAD TO REPLAY IT BECAUSE I WAS HAVING SO MUCH FUN. THE TAG TEAM ATTACKS!!!!! AQUA, XION, AND MICKEY'S COUNTER-ATTACK!!!!!! EVERYONE ACTUALLY WORKING TOGETHER!!!!!!!! IT’S ALL I EVER WANTED!!!!!!!! 

There are so many cute dialogue exchanges during the Guardians vs. replicas sequence, too! Ven and Roxas compliment each other, Aqua scolds Axel for talking too much (twice, I think? Axel fusses at her the second time, lmao), Terra says something to Riku that I couldn't quite catch, and Riku's like "All thanks to you!" It's just so cute and charming, and it really made the Guardians finally feel like a team.

Mickey Mouse straight-up Boromir-ing his way through the Nort replicas was... I think I loved that? Yeah, no, I loved that. I was laughing through half of it because I kept getting knocked back, but it was a great sequence (visually and gameplay-wise).

Connecting all the keyholes was very satisfying, and was just a beautiful visual altogether.

Sora and Kairi's reunion was adorable. And then Sora sees Goatanort enter the scene, and he just looks at Kairi and is like, "You ready, B?" and Kairi's like, "FUCK yeah, I'm taking his trachea through his kneecaps!!!!!" Okay, not really, lmao. Actually, Kairi's surprised when Sora asks her that, like she didn't expect him to let her help, or maybe she felt like she wouldn't even be able to, but she says she's ready anyway. Kairi’s under-confidence in her fighting skills is a little more apparent in the DLC. Like she says "I can do this" right before the final battle, but it comes off as her trying to reassure herself. She even has a counterattack where her battle quote is "Please work!" and I don't remember hearing her say that in the base game. Girl knows how outclassed she is compared to most of the other Guardians (and Xehanort), but she fights like hell anyway. Attagirl. 🎉

And as for Limit Cut:

Aww, I love that Terra calls Riku "a great leader."

Cheers to David Gallagher for saying "Are you sure about this?" with the exact same inflection as the John Cena meme.

Riku's a master now, right? When will he get some spiffy keyblade armor???????

Okay. Riku is having dreams about looking for Sora. Sora is dead (?), and "the edges of sleep and death touch." Kairi has been asleep for the past year so that the Radiant Garden team can study her heart in effort to find Sora. Nomura? Nomura? Nomura. You cannot fuck this up, man. You can do this. You can write the Destiny Trio working together again. You can write a full story in which Kairi has an active role. You can write her and Riku interacting. You can do it. I believe in you.

The data battles are so hardddddd. I wound up just watching all the LC cutscenes on youtube, lmfao. But I do want to try to beat at least some of these bosses. Tragically, Riku is TRAPPED IN MERLIN'S HOUSE, so you can't leave to grind or anything. Boo.

I don't really care about Yozora. I think we got a confirmation from Sora that Nameless Star is Stella (?), and that's cute for her I guess, but I genuinely don't care, lmao. But I definitely understand the compulsion to include beloved characters from old cancelled projects in your newer ones, so I hope Nomura has fun with that. ...That sounded sarcastic, lol, but I meant it. I hope he gets to do something cool and creative with this recycled cast. It just might not be a story I'll end up following, is all.

Data greeting is SO much fun. I sank a couple of hours into that the other night just creating scenes and playing with effects. The controls are really easy to use, and it's even fun to just explore environments like Radiant Garden and Scala ad Caelum without messing with photos at all. I hope we can unlock more character outfits and poses in the future, but I can definitely enjoy it as is for now.

Overall, I'm pretty happy with this DLC. True, about half of Re:Mind is a rehash of the Keyblade Graveyard scenes with some extra content here and there, but it's sort of justified story-wise since we're in a timeloop. I enjoyed the extra Kairi scenes and the interactions between the Guardians the most. Limit Cut is mainly just bonus bosses, but like I said, I do want to actually beat those once I can figure out a strategy for them. And I'm obviously having way too much fun with Data Greeting, lmao, so yeah. Not a bad update.

[imagine-organization-xiii]

How would the guys react if the reader whispered ”I want to ride you” into their ear in public?

Sam and the others on Discord are pretty much the ones who do all the nsfw stuff for me now LOL

Xemnas

Would not pay the words any attention while out in public. And you BEST hope that no one else heard you say it. Because as soon as you get back to your quarters, or abandoned hallway, or really once anywhere you two are alone, expect your words to come back to haunt you. Lord Xemnas does not excuse misbehavior in his castle, from anyone. Yourself included. So… prepare for some serious torture.

“You wanted to… what was it again, my pet? I can’t seem to hear you. Beg for me and maybe you’ll get your wish.”

Xigbar

Probably will laugh as soon as the words leave your lips. And I’m not talking a light chuckle. I mean a good hearty laugh. One that anyone nearby will hear, along with some kind of comment about how you were  insatiable. But Xigbar wasn’t one to hold out on a good time. Within a second, the two of you are warped out of the public eye and to the nearest place that the two of you could be alone.  Of course this could be anywhere.

“Ahahaha! Aw babe! You’re an animal, huh? You little wild thing! Welp, Let’s get outta here, shall we?”

Xaldin

You whisper into the towering mans ear as you sat in his lap in the Grey Area. Normally, Xaldin wasn’t one for public affection, but today felt fairly special. But as soon as you finish your request, the dreadlocked man’s eyes go momentarily wide before choking on the air he was breathing and erupting in a giant coughing fit. He did not expect that. At all. BUT– he is not mad. Knowing that the one he loves wants him is like a little swell of pride. And after the coughing fades, the burly man chuckles softly to himself before taking your hand and carrying you bridal style to your chambers.

*cough* *cough* *cough* Oh dear… You really don’t like to pull punches, do you?“

Vexen

No one else was at the lab that day other than you, Vexen, and Zexion; the usual crew. You thought it was okay to be a little flirtatious with your dear partner. Well, you thought very wrong. You whispered naughty words in his ear and the blonde scientist gasped out in audible horror. You could swear his cheeks were also a shade of light pink.

To make matters worse, you then received a lengthy riot act on what was and was not appropriate for the workplace and how you were lucky that he, Vexen, would not be filing a report with upper management. You knew it was only because everyone knew you were an item and no one cared anymore. The real bummer here is that Zexion saw the whole berating and gave you a really grossed out look that teenagers give their parents when they flirt with each other.

”*Gaaaaaasp* Y/N!!!! That is hardly appropriate given our being in the laboratory! This is not something I should expect from someone of your rank and maturity, but i shouldn’t be surprised!“ And you kind of tune out because he rants for a long time.

Lexaeus

Doesn’t matter where you are. You could be alone at home with no one around. Doesn’t matter. You whisper that shit into Lexaeus’ ear and "The Silent Hero” turns into “The Silent Tomato”. But this of course, isn’t at home. It’s in the middle of the grey area with a ton of people around. So it’s worse.

The man is SO red. Redder than you had ever seen him! And you suddenly felt a pang of guilt for even thinking of saying it aloud and embarrassing him so much. Luckily, the only one who noticed was Xigbar, but that also meant that everyone else was going to find out soon too. Later that night, you apologize to the soft man, and you make up and make some soft lovin’s to make up.

“…It’s alright…  Knowing you want me… in that way Is reward enough…”

Zexion

This boy is so damn sweet. He is in the lab with Vexen and Lexaeus nearby when you decide to try and give him a little thrill. And not only does this kid turn a BEET red, oh no, his expression turns into one of pure momentary terror and quickly turns to face you, making small but frantic waves and urging you to be quiet. He then checks to see if anyone heard what you had said, and when things look all clear he turns back to you, far more relaxed. It was kind of like a child in fear of getting caught by his parents, or maybe he was just afraid for his coworkers to find out about his personal life? Either way, it was very, very cute!

"Ah! ShhHS ShhhS HHhh ShHhhshhh! ….. Ah.. alright… that was.. a close one.. Maybe.. we should talk about this later.. when no one is around…”

Saix

As you could expect, Saix is one to give a very hot and cold response to just about anything you do. You are in his favorite place by the window when you decide to whisper something spontaneous in his ear. At first, the man says nothing, simply staring at his clipboard as if nothing happened. You assume he didn’t hear you. And no one else for that matter. Oh well. But boy did he hear you.

As soon as whoever was in the room exits, the air changes. In one swift motion, the Luna Diviner has his hands on your shoulders and  has slammed your body up against the window. Hard. Honestly you’re surprised it didn’t shatter from the force.  The man looks deep into your eyes with his golden orbs, and snarls into your ear. And later that night, you are in a heap of trouble.

“Don’t you ever jeopardize our work like that again. Don’t you worry, I know when you want me. I can sense it. I know when your body aches and yearns and desires. But I am the one that will make the calls on where and when we take care of these things. And this place is Not it. You will know soon enough.”

Axel

You and the Sea Salt Trio sat on the clocktower, enjoying some Sea Salt Ice Cream, as you always did after a hard day of work was done. It was nice to be invited on outings like this sometimes, but as you sat on the towers edge, eating your ice cream and Roxas and Xion engrossed in a conversation about something, your mind went to places dark and steamy. Feeling a little adventurous, you lean over and whisper some sultry words into Axel’s ear.

It takes him a second to process what your saying, mindlessly nodding and ‘uh huh’-ing until he puts the sentence together in his mind. And as soon as it does, his expression changes and his cheeks turn a flushed pink as he covers his nose and mouth with his hand and looks away sheepishly. “Ah– Ah.. Oh.. come on.. you don’t mean that.. Don’t be messing with me like that..”

The kids suddenly have stopped with whatever conversation they were having and look over to see what has Axel in such a state. “Axel? What’s wrong? What did Y/N say?”

“Nothing! Nothing! She didn’t say anything! Come on, you two, its time to head back.” The two younger members groaned as they slowly stood to portal back home. And when they weren’t looking, you caught the redhead staring at you with an expression you couldn’t quite put your finger on. Later that night, you remind Axel of just how cute he looked, dumbstruck and embarrassed.“Alright.. Alright… You got me.. But next time, I’m not gonna be as startled. Got it Memorized?”

Demyx

Today, Demyx is doing what he usually likes to do when he isn’t trying to avoid work or hiding from superiors - was loudly practicing his sitar in the most inconvenient places in the castle. Today that inconvenient place was in the Cafeteria that Never Was. While most times, no one wanted to hear the Melodious Nocturne play, the Cafeteria was one of the places where people didn’t mind as much to hear music. People liked the atmosphere to listen to music as they ate their food and enjoyed small conversation.

You often liked to watch the boy play his music. It was one of the few times that he was truly at peace. But sometimes you got bored and wanted to throw Demyx off his rhythm. So, as he played on and on, you sneak behind the musician and get super close his ear, and whisper something sneaky into his ear. And under the guise of music, no one else could hear. Well, until the boys playing stops completely as the last word leaves your lips.He was still the only one who heard you, you were pretty sure. But with the sudden lack of music, all conversation and excess noise, stopped, turning all the attention to the little musician that is currently turning the deepest pink.

The silence permeated through the cafeteria. And as all eyes fell on him, the small boy let our a panicked squeak and the color on his cheeks started to phase from a pink color to a deep red. It was clear your words had an effect, but now it was a little much. You quickly took the musicians hand and led him out of the dining area and into one of the castles many abandoned hallways. You turn to face Demyx when you finally stop walking. It looks like he may cry. He’s embarrassed. Guilt-ridden, you give the boy a soft hug.

“You alright?” You ask.“Yeah.. I’m okay.. Did.. you really mean that? What you said in there?” You nod and suddenly, the weepy boy in front of turns back into the mischievous boy you adored. “Okay.. good. Because we’re going back to my room. It’s Demyx Time.”

Luxord

The Organization is, for the most part, a very serious organization with serious goals and aspirations. But when the work is over for the day, many of the members of the Organization like to relax and do things they enjoyed in their life. For some of the older members, that was meeting up on Friday nights in secret, and playing a few rounds of poker. This was Luxord’s idea, obviously, but win or lose, many of these members liked to play and forget work for even just the night.

The usual crew was there; Luxord, Xigbar, Xaldin, Lexaeus, and then there was you. Since it was Luxord’s event, you were graciously allowed to come to watch the games when you found out about them. This was unlike Demyx who found out and was immediately ignored when he asked to come along. But you enjoyed these games, and sometimes you even played a round or two.

Tonight, you watched as Luxord’s calloused hands dealt out the cards. Watching his fingers shuffle the cards with such precision and grace was something of beauty, but tonight it brought you to think of your own desires. As the Gambler of Fate watched upon his peers with a confident sneer, you crept over to stand behind him. You leaned down as he waited for his players to fold, and whispered the honey-laced words into his pierced ears.

There was a moment of silent as the sentence the gambler had started hung in the air to hear what his beloved had to say. There was another moment of silence in the room, the others only hearing nothing but your hushed and muffled whisper. And then the room erupted with Luxord’s hearty laugh. The others never did find out what the gambler was going to say before you interrupted him, as Luxord immediately called the poker night to an early end and left with to you to, they assumed, fuck the ever living shit out of you.

“Oh come on now, men! This is Poker!! You shouldn’t afraid to— …… ha HA Ha Ha! Is that so, Love? Alright, Gentlemen.  This has been a sheer delight, as always. But I suddenly have much better plans for the evening. So with that, I bid you goodnight. Come now, Love. We have business to attend to.”

Marluxia

While most of his free time is spent in the privacy of his personal garden, what many people outside of the org didn’t know was that Marluxia also frequently liked to read in the silence of the castles expansive library. And sometimes you liked to tag along!

Today, the two of you were not alone in the library however. Zexion, Xaldin, and Saix were all looking through the library, lost in their own books. Everyone, that is, except for you. You were bored. Reading was great but your mind was on… other things, so as Marluxia stood and walked to an aisle to take a new book, you decided to follow. As the slender man faced the shelf, you leaned up from behind him and whispered into the assassins ear.

At first, he doesn’t react, as if he didn’t hear you, but in a swift motion, Marluxia turned a full 180, grabbed you by the shoulders and pushed you back that you’re pinned against the adjacent bookcase. All of this with the most grace and silence. Blue eyes met yours with a look of passion that sent a pang of desire straight to your loins. A long fingers made their way up, gently caressed your face and made their way, tangling into locks of your hair.  Then, the assassin leaned down, his sapphire eyes looking into your souls and making you feel as if  your body was on fire.

Lips locked. Hands wandered. It was exhilarating. There wasn’t much reading after that. Though getting caught kissing in the bookcases was not your plan of that day. Plus Zexion was kinda pissed to see you kissing on top of his books.“Aw guys… not again… can you.. can you not do that..? Ugh…”

“Don’t be jealous, kid. It’s alright.. there’s plenty of other places we could go…” And with a flurry of rose petals, you were gone, whisked away to somewhere you two could definitely be alone.

[darkzeruda1214]

I’m not going deny, I was heavily inspired by just a Pancake’s video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MoIpdFLz-Ls&t=4s

The Fandom does a much better job at writing and developing these gals than game has ever done or shown. I do love these three but stuff like this still bugs the shit out of me.

I love these gals. But I’m not going to deny that Just a Pancake really makes a valid point. And to be fair after some thinking I see the argument he was trying to make.

Now I know we all have own opinions and that’s fine. I stay firm with mine as you do yourselves. And that’s what makes a fandom, we all have a right to dislike and disagree if we want to. In fact I do encourage because it allows debates and second thinking if needed.

Anyways… back on topic, I’m going to be blunt. But Kingdom Hearts just dosen’t make good female characters. (This is not including Disney girls of FF, just KH original characters)

And it’s kinda sad considering how few main original KH female characters there are. You think they’d be able to bulk up personalities, but that seems to go to all the male characters.

As amazing and fun this game is, it needs some tweaking on making their female characters, feel alive.

Now I’m not talking about the fandom perspectives of these gals, because I’m going to be real. The fans do an INSANELY better job at portraying these girls. (TAKE NOTES NOMURA DAMN IT!)  

Now there are a few exceptions a couple being Larxene and Olette. To me (and feel to disagree with me) they were the only ones that felt like had something to offer.

Larxene has more character than all the other gals. Being sarcastic, sadistic and snide (at times insufferable bitch) and to me that breaths a lot of personality and I love her for it. Even her voice actor has put a great amount of effort in bringing Larxene to life. Out of all the KH girls she is the one who brings in most of the attention. And even in the few scenes she gets the spotlight without even trying.

The second being Olette. Now I know some of you are already typing as to how she has anything to offer. She’s not even a main character! Yes, and that the thing, I think because she has no major role in it allows the writers to give her a character that comes off as simple and sweet. She’s the only one to demonstrated that she’s as normal and ordinary as a person can be in this series. Something we don’t exactly see happening in the KH franchise since every named character has a role to fulfill, and for her to be a small breath of fresh air is a nice change of pace. It shows: yes there are normal people, with normal lives. They have no scripted important task ahead of them, and it’s nothing to be ashamed of it.

And not only that, we did get to know bits and parts of her personality. And her interests thanks to small details sprinkled in KH2 and 3. Such as showing she has her priorities straight and 'actually' doing her homework/jobs before the due date. She loves going to the beach and loves spending time with her friends. Also she like to go shopping. A simple character, with a simple purpose. And to me she feels alive and just in general, a simple but easy character to relate to. She’s a perfect example of a beauty in simplicity.  

Now… as for the main girls.

Aqua is literally my favorite KH girl. However, the thing about her, is that she shared too many similar features with Sora. Now I don’t mean personality wise because Aqua is much more mature and level headed than Sora could ever be 

However, as much as I really hate to admit it. Aqua doesn’t have anything to offer other than a serious role model and as a plot device...

I think what made Aqua popular is the fact that she’s a strong independent female character who doesn’t need no man to save her. (Also, she has a really well thought out design). And for that I praise and respect her for it. Yet… throughout the game, she relatively keeps the same straight face. Her expression has shown to be sad, angry or just stoic. Nothing too bad, but as far as that, we don’t see Aqua have any interests beyond wanting to save her friends. And to me that’s all she did in the series, I’m not going to lie the first time I played Birth by Sleep, I saw absolutely no reason for her to be in the game. I mean Xehanort (he can go suck a dick) focused all of his attention on Terra to take over his body. And on Ventus to play a role in forging the X-blade.

But as for Aqua, to me it seemed like she was just walked in there to simply fill a space and create another trio. Now I’m not saying under circumstance that she is useless. After all, her role in the game is a huge catalyst for the events of KH1. It gives her a purpose and is one of the most important characters. But to me that felt more like a large plot device and changer other than being a person. Aqua suffered a lot in the series, no doubt. But being a catalyst isn’t enough to be a good character. She’s not bad by any means, as I still hold her a place in my heart. But I feel like she was put on plot pedestal in the series instead of being given a full fledged personality that makes her relatable. There are only two instances that allowed Aqua to not be a emotionless character:

One being with Zack asking her on a date and the second is when she tried to help Cinderella and Jaq in Castle of Dreams world. To see an awkward/embarrassed expression instead of the dull zombie-like one was a nice sense of relief to give her something.      

Another character that suffers from this treatment is Xion. She is one of my favorite characters from 358/2 days, but beyond the fact that she got the short end of the stick of being forgotten by her own friends (and everyone else for that matter). Her story is a tragic one, one that always gives me the feels and her theme is both beautiful and sad. But I wouldn’t say she had a character that made me connect with her as much as it could have.

She definitely has more expression and personality compared to Aqua that’s for sure. But not by much, however hers is within good reason. After all she was a puppet created by Vexen and Organization XIII don’t get me wrong. I understand that, and I would say it’s unfair for me to be saying this to her. And you’re right, it is unfair, but Xion eventually learned how to have emotions. How to cry and what happiness and laughter is and feels like.

The one thing I did get from her is that she loves sea salt ice cream and is one of the cutest and sweetest character in the game. But as far as her interests goes, there’s not much to go by. Now I know you can argue that both Roxas and Axel don’t exactly express their interest beyond their time in the clock tower. And it’s true, but Xion doesn’t add much more either… again I feel like she was only added in the game last minute. And that’s why in the story she’s forgotten so they have an explanation as to what happened to her and why she’s not recalled in KH2. Xion also gets the “plot device” treatment rather than as a character. And to me it feels like a disrespect to her character! (Her manga incarnation is MILES better).

However, I also don’t say much on her either only because she is still learning how to be her own individual. But my point still stands, though it’s prone to change, mostly because she now has the opportunity to be a character after KH3 since everyone remembers her and has her own body. And she might finally get an personality expansion in the next set of installments in the future.

Now as for Kairi…

Well this topic has been talked and reviewed over to death. In fact I even spoke about her character in this post here: https://princesszelda-heroine.tumblr.com/post/187815960646/kairi-deserved-better

But to sum it up, Kairi hasn’t been given a chance to shine as an individual compared to her friends and the others. And after what happened in KH3 I’m just more frustrated with the writers and developers that they won’t allow her to grow with sustenance! Whatever she had in KH1 and 2 was totally stripped in KH3.

My point being. Being a plot device in game or a catalyst for another one. Or having amazing/original design, does. Not. Make. A. Good. Fleshed. Out. Character.

I’m sorry to say this. But it’s true.

This is why I hate the treatment these gals go through in game. I stick solely to fan works because they give these girls the justice they deserve and makes me love them more as a whole.

I know there is a lot of things I didn’t cover, and maybe I missed a couple of points. But this is how I see this, and how I think the franchise is really missing a lot of good opportunities developing them.  

They really don't have much to offer as far as personality growth. Thank You KH Manga series.

[kessielrg]

[Kingdom Hearts] I Won’t (Let Her) Be Forgotten

Summary: In which Xion, in fear of being forgotten again, becomes a writer. [Post KH3][oneshot]

Rating: K+

Word Count: 2,562 words

If you like the story, please buy me a coffee or reblog!

-

'A little talent is a good thing to have if you want to be a writer. But the real requirement is the ability to remember every scar.' -Stephen King

. . .

Xion was bored. Axel (Lea? She wasn't sure which name he wanted to keep yet) sat next to her on the couch, mindlessly flipping through some trashy gossip magazine without a hint of interest. Roxas had gone out with Hayner to a new Grandstander game. She wasn't sure, but she believed Olette had dragged Pence to the mall for some shopping. And no one but Axel knew what Siax (Isa?) did when no one was keeping track of him.

“Something on your mind, Xion?” Axel asked, surprising Xion for a moment.

Embarrassed for some reason, Xion looked down at the ground. “There's nothing to do.” she admitted. “I'm bored.”

Axel gave a small snort as he put down his magazine. “Sounds like you need a hobby.” he gently admonished, shaking a finger at her.

Xion looked up at him, tilting her head in curiosity as she repeated, “A… what?”

“Oh boy.” Axel then sheepishly mumbled. “Forgot you're still kinda new at this whole 'free will' thing.” Shaking his head, Axel tried to explain, “Hobbies are something you do when you've got the free time to do 'em. It's usually something you like doing, like painting or sewing. You used to collect seashells back in the Organization- that could be considered a hobby. Collecting stuff, that is.”

She hadn't considered that before. And while it was true that Twilight Town had its own beach, she still needed to money to go. She admitted as much to him not long after. Axel gave a small shrug.

“Then find something else to do.” he said. “Go ask Naminé for drawing lessons, or maybe write a novel or something, I don't know. We all need our hobbies, you know?”

Xion only continued to look at Axel. He hated it when she and Roxas would just look at him with big doe eyes, barely blinking as they waited for him to spit more of his made up wisdom. It made him incredibly uncomfortable (possibly even more so, now that he had his heart back) and there was no stopping them either.

“How about you go for a walk?” he asked, trying hard to not sound too hasty. “Clear your head a bit.”

Another unnerving blink, and Xion gave a small nod as she started to get up. Axel sighed in relief the moment she shut the door behind her.

. . .

Xion wandered the streets of Twilight Town with a faint hint of scrutiny. She didn't mean it maliciously- she was only trying to wrap her mind around the idea of a hobby. Absently, Xion tracked her way up to Sunset Hill; she noticed for the first time just how many painters were set up here. She sat down on one of the hill's benches, and watched as the painters did their best to recreate the sunset.

“Hey Xion!”

Xion turned her head to see Olette coming up to her. The girl put on a wide smile as stood up again, while waving back.

“Hello Olette!” she greeted.

“What'cha doing all the way up here?” Olette questioned, still smiling. “I happened to see you walk by while I was putting my new clothes away.”

“I was bored.” Xion admitted. She frowned for a moment before adding, “Axel says I need a hobby.”

“You could start a diary!” her friend happily suggested. “It's a book where you right down all your ideas and memories so they won't be forgotten. I have one- I like adding photos and small mementos like pressed flowers in it!”

“A diary...” Xion absently repeated. But it wasn't the idea of the diary that sent her into a quiet, contemplative state. It was that word -forgotten- that made Xion's mind reel. Isa had once admitted that the reason why she remembered her was because of Even's research notes. Everyone's memory of her faded when her heart returned to Sora, but the written words about her existence had remained.

A sudden, fearful thought crossed Xion's mind then; what if she was forgotten again?

“I don't have anything to write with.” she admitted, speaking more to herself than to Olette.

“I have a few spare composition books from school.” Olette offered. “I can give you one if you want it.”

Xion's heart leaped into her throat. How did she get so lucky to know so many generous people? In a small, almost needy voice, she asked, “Would you?”

“Sure!” came the happy affirmation. “Wait here, I'll be back in a sec.”

Before Xion could stop her, Olette was already running back to her house. It took more than a second for Olette to come back- more like three minutes, really. But she did good on her promise, presenting Xion with a black composition notebook in a small florish.

“T-thank you.” Xion humbly thanked as she took the notebook from her friend.

“No problem!” Olette grinned. “Just remember, you don't have to share your diary with anyone. It's just about you, your thoughts, and all your favorite memories!”

Xion gave Olette a curious tilt of her head before looking down at the notebook. In a small, thoughtful voice, she murmured to herself, “All my favorite memories...”

. . .

Olette failed to mention that starting to write would be the hardest part. Xion had been staring at the first page for the past five minutes. How did you start a book all about yourself? How do you start a book of all your favorite memories when so many were actually quite sad? The pencil in Xion's hand hovered over the page in anticipation. Slowly, unsure of herself, Xion let the pencil tip touch the paper as she wrote the first sentence.

Hello, I am Xion.

Xion looked at that first sentence and immediately grimaced. She quickly scratched out the sentence- it sounded like she was writing a letter Isa style. How boring. She wasn't like that. Tilting her head to the side -while making a rather disgusted face- Xion tried to start over.

My name is

Nope, that opening was dumb too. It was dumb the moment it was written. Again, Xion scratched out the sentence and started to rack her brain for ideas.

Why was this so hard? They were just words, not some high level Heartless that was terrorizing the town. Jiminy didn't have any trouble writing in his journal. Of course, it was always about Sora and not Jiminy himself, but…

A small jolt shot through Xion in realization. She looked back down at her notebook and bit her lip in thought. With a certain curiosity coming over her now, Xion allowed her heart to write the words for her. Her hand followed without any conscious effort otherwise.

Ebba's mind was blank. If you had seen her, you would have mistaken her for a doll, or a puppet. It is hard to describe Ebba in full- her appearance tended to change. To a stranger, she was a nobody. To her friends? Well, she didn't have any friends at that point. Her mind was still blank. She needed to see the world.

Xion blinked at the words for a moment- slowly realizing that her hand was now faintly in pain from writing so quickly. But something inside of her filled with glee. Not five minutes before, this 'Ebba' girl didn't exist. And now? Now she did. Smiling, Xion continued to write, her hand guided by the words placed in her heart.

Ebba's first memories are filled with a cold, bright light. She was guided, shuffled, around like a mannequin in a department store. She could nod when spoken to and even focus on certain people in an uncanny gaze. It scared her first friend, when they first locked eyes in a circular throne room, but she would not have known that until years after. For now, she was still blank, like a page ready to be written onto.

. . .

Admittedly, Roxas had not seen Xion for a good part of the day. When Axel told him that Xion had found a hobby, a part of the teen could understand. He was the same way when he first discovered skateboarding- although he was really bad at it then. But still, Roxas missed talking to Xion when he came home, so he started his way up to her room.

“Hey Xion,” he called as he knocked on her door. “You in there?”

“Yeah.” came the immediate answer.

“Can I come in?”

There was a small pause before Xion said, “Sure.”

Roxas grinned, opening Xion's door enough so he could slink in. He found her sitting on her bed- nose buried in a composition notebook with her hand writing on its pages in a blind fury.

“I brought you some hot chocolate.” Roxas offered. He held up said drink a bit so she could see it. Too bad Xion didn't even bother to look up.

“That's nice.” she absently told him. She made a vague motion to her nightstand before adding, “You can put in on my nightstand.”

A bit taken aback by her attitude, Roxas did as he was told. He turned to see what she was doing when he heard the sound of a page turn. Curiosity had always been his strongest suit.

“What'cha writin' there, Xion?” Roxas innocently asked, trying to peek over her shoulder. Jumping a few inches in surprise, Xion immediately closed her notebook and gave Roxas a rather ugly glare.

“You can't read it!” she demanded, now hugging the notebook close to her chest.

The teen blinked in surprise. “Huh? Why not?”

“Because...” Xion started but found she couldn't finish. She tried to rack her brain for any answer that could make up for her sudden outburst. “Because it's my private diary that I don't want to share with you. Or anyone. That's just how diaries work.”

“Oh… okay.” he replied. Xion refused to look at his small pout.

“Please Roxas,” she then softly told him, “I just want to be left alone for awhile. Thank you for the hot chocolate.”

Still disappointed, Roxas nodded his head in agreement before heading back out of her room. Xion felt bad, but she couldn't stop her writing groove. The iron was hot and she wasn't going to miss it.

. . .

“Lucas, that's a stick.” Ebba told her friend. Her voice was flat and low. It was still flattering that he was willing to lose his own blade so they could finish the mission, but she didn't imagine he'd do it like this.

Xion snickered to herself. She had been serious when she told Roxas that. In hindsight, it had been pretty funny too, especially with the way she remembered saying it. With a smile, Xion reached for the hot chocolate mug and took a long, peaceful sip.  Once she had let her heart do the writing, every word Xion wrote came out easily and with a purpose. To think that Hayner once complained about how hard it was to write an essay for one of his classes. Writing was super easy once you got the hang of it.

The hot chocolate had gone cold now, but Xion didn't exactly like it piping hot anyway. She absently swirled the cup as she read over her last written words. Her handwriting was either getting neater or sloppier- she couldn't decide which right now.

But then a sudden train horn made Xion jump- she immediately lost her grip on the cup, leading it to spill all over her notebook. For a moment, Xion didn't quite register what had happened until she looked at the now ruined pages.

“No!” she immediately screamed before letting out even more frenzied, “No, no, no, no, no, no-no-no-NO!”

Logic would dictate that she should have gotten a towel. But, in her horrified mind, she only thought to try to rub the cooled drink on the notebook. It only made things worse. Xion had been sent into such a panic that she didn't even notice when Axel poked his head into her room.

“Hey Xion, are you o-” he started to say before seeing the mess. As Xion started to dissolve into angered tears, the young man cautiously entered her room a bit more as he sheepishly scratched the back of his head. Feeling a bit awkward now, he wondered out loud, “So… Would you like to talk about it now, or do you need some time to cool off?”

But Xion only shook her head. “I can't let her be forgotten!” she told him as she worked to shake the hot chocolate off the book.

Stepping a bit further to help Xion out a bit, Axel ventured to question, “Who?”

“Ebba!” Xion immediately shouted. “I mean, me. I mean… I… I…!” and with that, the girl buried her face in her hands and started to weep. Axl let out a soft groan.

Why did he always get stuck with the icky jobs?

“Xion,” he sighed, taking a spot on her bed that wasn't ruined from the hot chocolate. “You're not going to be forgotten again. We won't let it happen.” He then put a hand to his heart, and the other up in the air. “Scout's honor.”

“That's what you said last time.”

Axel's blood turned to ice. Without saying more than five sentences to him, he already knew why the notebook's loss was making Xion so upset. Even though he knew it wasn't going to help, Axel tried to assure her with a small, “You can write another.”

“It won't be the same.”

Axel absently rubbed his temples in thought. He was starting to get a headache now. Geez, how was he going to phrase this?

“Xion…” he sighed, “Look… No story is told the same way twice. It's impossible. You can write another story about this… Ebba girl- you might not want to hear it, but I think you'll have to. Some times life is just like that; we get started on something great, something bad happens, and then we chose to either redo it or give up. I don't know this Ebba girl very well, but I do know you. Are you really going to let one hang up stop you from writing Ebba's story? Your story?”

Xion did not look Axel in the eye. As much as she didn't want Axel to be right, she knew he had a point.

“No.” she quietly mumbled. “It won't.”

“Good.” Axel nodded. “Now, let me get you some towels so we can clean up this mess.”

Xion only gave a small nod as she turned her attention back to her ruined notebook. Upon closer inspection, a lot of the words were still legible, if only hidden behind a light brown stain. She'd have to separate several pages and use something to make sure they didn't stick together as the paper dried. In all luck, maybe she could rewrite the story almost by verbatim. Besides, there were some parts that she wanted to reword or make clearer to begin with.

Now in a clearer state of mind, Xion smiled as she let out a comforted sigh. Ebba's story would live on, and so would she.