#i really do love seeing random media just flood my dash

[willowwtrees]

big fan of tumblr because sometimes I will open my dashboard to see a wall of posts of a specific media and I’m like oh epic the frieren reblogger is at it again

[vampirepuppygirl]

I'm not gonna tag this as anything related to it, but Bridget "discourse" makes me really uncomfortable

A fictional trans girl very blatantly coming out causing so much backlash and debate is just a constant reminder that there's a very large group of people that hate the fact that I exist

I love Bridget positivity posts! Bridget herself is a wonderful character and I love seeing the random pictures and fanart of her floating around on my dash.

But the day it was announced? There was no way I could've been fast enough to purge the almost constant stream of vitriol against Bridget being a girl that flooded almost every social media I bothered to be on.

It's been legitimately affecting my mood lately and I don't know how to get rid of the feeling.

If Bridget isn't allowed to just be a girl without half the internet furiously trying to deny her womanhood, what chance do I have?

[leeholtwrites]

Magical Girl Reunion Tour - C6

Sarah 

Sometimes there seemed to never be enough space in her bag. Sarah hiked her bag back up on her shoulder as she climbed the steps to her small apartment. She wished she lived in a building with an elevator, but it was one of the many prices she paid for chasing her academic aspirations. At least her studio was large, if a bit strangely shaped. It had been remodeled before she moved in, and she quite enjoyed having her own small washer and dryer stacked by the fridge in its own alcove.

She unlocked her door. Once inside, she heaved her bag onto her bed and sighed in relief. Sarah had some time before office hours, so she'd thought she'd come home and eat while going over some of her dissertation work which was code for hunkering over left over take out while watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer for the fifth time with a notebook and a scowl. Sarah was beginning to think that doing a deep dive into the representation of women in late nineties and early two thousands genre television wasn't so good. What hadn't been talked about already? She tried to convince herself that her own magical experiences hadn't influenced her decision, but all she as doing was lying to herself.

The glass top of her stove clicked when she set a skillet on one of the burners. She turned it on and added some oil before opening the fridge to retrieve the box of left over sweet potato fries from the day before. She placed the box on the small square of counter and stared off to the other side of the room as she waited for the pan to heat. Looking over her possessions on the shelves framing the window on the other side of the room allowed her brain some time to focus as she catalogued her collection of books, shows, movies, and things. Academic tomes on feminism and film, sometimes both. The occasional fiction book. Seasons and seasons of shows, because she was one of those hardcopy people, most of them bent in a fantasy or science fiction direction. The worn copies of Veronica Mars always stood out.  Movies were a different story. She only had so much space, so many of her films crowded hard drives instead of her precious shelf space, but she did have a few precious ones. Amongst her media - usually shoved in front of it - were a couple of photo frames and the occasional Funko Pop, gifts from friends. The photos were of her family, and one was of her high school friends in between the magic crime fighting.

Next to that photo lay her wand. She had long ago wondered if hiding it would have been smarter. The truth, she discovered, is that everyone thought it was some prop from some obscure genre show, maybe an anime. It's bright blue diamond textured handle, and pale blue orb patterned in little gold arrow heads could only be found in blurry twenty year old newspaper photos, but no one really questioned it. If they did, she said she made it up.

She crossed her arms and pursed her lips. Now that she had time to think, things had felt a little off lately. For one, her friend and down the hall neighbor Michelle hadn't sent her one cat gif in the last two days, and that was unlike her. Normally, her program coder friend would bounce down the hall at random or throw open her door to wave at Sarah as she headed off to class. Michelle was also a graduate student, albeit way more perky and put together that Sarah herself felt. Michelle was life and loved her work. And that is why she was worried.

She knew she was home, Sarah could hear Michelle's taste in obscure bands blaring through her door, no doubt upsetting the rest of her neighbors. She looked down at the sad box of sweet potato fries. No, today she would see if Michelle wanted something to eat. Maybe get her out of her apartment.

In the bathroom, she brushed out her wavy dark hair - resisting the temptation to tie it back up in a messy bun - and cleaned her glasses. She arranged her bag for her afternoon schedule. Now a lot lighter, tossed it over her shoulder. With her hand on her door knob, she paused and turned back to her shelves. Something was telling her to grab her wand. It was probably her intuition. It had always been pretty solid. Slipping her wand into her bag, she marched down the hall to Michelle's apartment.

"Michelle?" she called as she knocked. "It's Sarah. Want to go for lunch?"

No answer.

"Michelle?"

"Go away!"

Her hand hovered over the door. What? That was so unlike Michelle. Normally it was her  yelling at Michelle to go away when she was struggling with some particularly hairy bit of theory. She hesitated, then knocked again. "Come on Michelle. Come eat. Then you can get back to whatever your doing."

The door flew open. Sarah recoiled from what she saw. Michelle stood framed by the door frame, gaunt and grey with dark circles around feral eyes. Her red hair was dirty and unkempt, and she still wore the clothes Sarah had last seen her in. Behind her, her massive computer set up glowed with an eerie light. Sarah narrowed her eyes. She knew what Michelle's computer set up looked like when she was working, and that wasn't it.

"Fuck off, Sarah," Michelle snarled. "All you do is get between me and my work with your… friendship."

Michelle tried to slam the door in Sarah's face, but she caught it. From Michelle's appearance, Sarah imagined she would be much weaker, but there was something supernaturally strong about her. A thought began to itch at the back of Sarah's brain. A thought she didn't like.

With a all her body weight, she shoved Michelle's door open. Michelle stumbled back into her studio apartment. It was the same size as Sarah's, so she practically stumbled into her desk chair, catching herself at the last moment on the edge of her desk.

"You're going to regret that," Michelle sneered.

"Look, you're sick," Sarah said placating, her hands up. "Did you find some strange magical device, uh, thing. It can look like anything. Maybe it was something that gave you a bad feeling, but you touched it anyway. It told you it would make you great. It would give you the skills you needed to achieve your dream. It knew your insecurities. It knew just what to say."

By Michelle’s hand, her mouse unfurled. It grew legs, six from by Sarah's guess and skittered up Michelle's arm. Michelle cried out in shock. Sarah rushed forward to pull it off her before it could reach the back of Michelle's neck. She grabbed her friend by the left shoulder and began to reach over her. With her unnatural strength, Michelle shoved her away. She tripped over the edge of a rug, smashing into the door frame, and spun around to land face down in the hall. Her bag had fallen off in the tumble, spilling its contents next to her. In the hall's dim lights, her wand glowed softly.

Michelle screamed. Sarah looked over her shoulder. The place where she had hit the door frame protested. She grit her teeth, ignoring it. She had to see.

The mouse had latched onto the back of Michelle’s neck and grown. Chitinous growths sprung from her neck and along her shoulders, slowly expanding down her arms and over her chest. It was the shiny black of the tech it had impersonated. Worry and dread ran through Sarah. Hitting someone covered in the stuff was like punching steel, and trying to hang onto her would be nearly impossible. The device would turn Michelle almost superhuman. There was only one answer.

She reached her hand out towards her wand, scooting forward, her hand outstretched. It flared the moment her fingers brushed it. Warmth flooded through her and a strange wash of joy. Sarah had long suspected that the wands might have their own feelings, but now was not the time to dwell on it. With the wand now firmly in her hand, she jumped to her feet, her wand in the air, and shouted, “Dress me in patience!”

Time slowed. Her arms stretched, one before her and one behind, as glittery golden light ran along them. In its wake soft, shiny gloves covered her once chipped nail polish. The light spread to her torso. She spun on her toes. The light revealed a vibrant blue short sleeved tunic, an enormous voluminous bow of soft blue at her throat. She kicked a leg up, drawn by the golden light. Bright blue, knee high boots and soft white leggings. Her arms over her head, she spun again, her loose hair drawn into an elegant braid, a gold band across her forehead. With a flash, she struck a pose. “I will not stop till this fight is through!”

Sarah tried to ignore how silly she felt. At least she had pants this time.

Michelle roared, if Sarah could even call her Michelle anymore. Her eyes were pure black and her skin had grown even whiter. The black growths had spread, giving her a tech-like armored look, all shiny black plates. “A Defender. How predictable.” She said, her voice layered with whatever magi-tech parasite the mouse had been.

Sarah held her wand out in her left hand. “Reveal your true form!” Another flash of glittery gold and she held a bow, soft blue with gold filigree. She grabbed the string with her right hand and drew it back, a streak of iridescent light appearing in place of an arrow. “Let Michelle go.”

The creature laughed, a twisted smile on its lips. “Did you really think I would make it that easy?” It spun around and dove out the window.

A scream wanted jump from Sarah’s lips. She tamped it down, dropping her right hand and running for the broken window. Fighting the urge to stop, she threw herself out into the air, spinning to face the sky. She grabbed her string, pulled, and shouted “Rainbow braid!” She let go. A streak of rainbow light shot towards the top of her building, embedding in the brick. She grabbed the line as it solidified and slid along it to the ground, moving much faster than she wanted to. Swallowing another scream, she hit the ground in a roll. Sarah jumped to her feet just in time to see the black armor of the creature, now having entirely swallowed Michelle, charging down the street still laughing.

Sarah dashed after her, arms pumping, the pain in her back forgotten. With her magically enhanced abilities, she caught up to the creature quickly. The creature hadn’t just been running from her. It had been busy. A cloud of technical components surrounded her. Broken bits of cell phone screens, computer boards, SD cards, and other bits stolen from the screaming crowd orbited the creature as she whipped around to face Sarah.

The pieces began combine, turning into four orbiting satellites. There was the gleam of camera lenses, the glitter of metal, the shine of the black material that covered Michelle. The creature had used a piece of itself to create whatever circled it now. Sarah wasn’t going to find out. She raised her bow, the streak of light appearing when she drew the string, and fired. The magical arrow bounced off an invisible force before the creature, leaving a blue ripple in its wake. She fired a couple more times. Same effect.

The creature laughed in its strange voice. And then it multiplied. Four of the armor-plated creatures stood before her. Sarah struggled not to look dumb-struck. The parasites drew on their host’s passions, their work. What had Michelle been working on again? Some kind of encrypted security software that automatically made back-ups of whatever the user was working on. And protected it.

She swallowed a curse. Defenders didn’t curse, openly. That explained the copies, the armor, and the force field. It had been a long time since she longed to be surrounded by her team, but now the feeling threatened to swallow her. Sure, she kept in touch with them, still played virtual Dungeons and Dragons with Shonda, but as friends. The barely even talked about their magical girl soldier days, and actively avoided speaking about Maggie.

God-damned Maggie, who she would need to defeat this parasite properly.

Her hand brushed her hip, feeling for her phone. She could at least call Shonda or Chloe or Kelsey for backup. Unfortunately, it was still on the floor in her building’s hallway outside Michelle’s room.

“Well, of fucking course,” she muttered.

[heechulhamster]

The Truth You Can’t Hide II - Junmyeon

KIM JUNMYEON (SUHO) x Fem Reader

Chapter 2[The Truth You Can’t Hide MASTERLIST]

1 - 2 - 3 -  4 - 5 - 6 ongoing

You did it so well for six years. You’ve hid your son from the biggest threat of his life. But one mishap led to the biggest secret in your life being face to face with the man you’ve kept him away from all these years - his father.

Mafia!AU, Angst.

This goes a bit way way back, enjoy the back story. :)

The ache that grew on your overworked feet didn’t even stop you from scurrying down the building and get yourself a cab. Not even bothering to free yourself out of the restraining work clothes. You’re not even sure if Junmyeon still lives in his old penthouse unit in the busy center of Seoul. The address itself was vague in your memory, the streets surely did change a lot for recognition for the past seven years. The city was noisier than ever, full of blinding lights and buzzing people of various appearances. There are more skyscrapers that filled the skyline, and the luxurious condominium you knew very well towered over the others. You could only look at its uppermost floor amongst all the glimmering lights of the city, hoping that in there is your son.

It wasn’t that you’re thinking that Junmyeon would ever hurt Jaejin. There’s this knowledge deep in your heart, past all the anxiousness that his apparent secret life brings you, that Junmyeon is still this gentle and well meaning man that you used to love. And the fact that he now knows that Jaejin is of his own blood just assures you that he is safe. This fear in your mind is this possibility of not seeing him again. That he’ll see this opulent and lavish life as better than he experiences with you. To grow up in a life like his father’s - to have servants at your beck and call, all that you wish will be laid down on your hands with a snap of a finger. Or that maybe Junmyeon will have all this pent up anger and desire to retaliate hiding your son from you. And with all his power and wealth, you know that if wishes to keep Jaejin from you, he’ll do it very well.

But there’s this hope in your heart that Junmyeon is the same loving guy you met over a decade ago.

The scent of both sweaty bodies and alcohol flooded your senses, both of which you weren’t accustomed to. Your friends, Haein and Ara who took the same major with you, convinced you that joining a sorority is a must and vital to Legal Management students. As these “sisters” would eventually help you once you reach law school. So now here you are, clad in a white dress that flowed just above your knee with a white feathery headband on your head guised as a halo. Apparently, the theme was something Angels and Demons. With your refusal to wear any skimpy and tight red or black bodycon dress, the exact thing Ara and Haein went for, you just sticked with the Angel part of the theme.

You three are at your 2nd year of college. And after the gruelling rules of the recruitment the last semester, all neophytes are excited to be rewarded with this soro-frat mixer - and you’ll lose the term reward very loosely. Mixers like these seems to be intended to find the members’ next college boy toy or some random exciting hookup for the night. Both things you aren’t exactly into.

You wouldn’t exactly call yourself a prude, but you’re not really outgoing either. Growing up in a conservative and traditional family, you grew up preferring reading books and staying in over the common high schooler choice of partying outside. A trait that wouldn’t get you very far in college.

To add to your discomfort, the party rules would keep you out of Haein and Ara’s company the whole night. It was a shackles mixer, where you’d practically be chained to a fraternity member the whole night and forced to get to know them. So you sat at the sorority house kitchen, far from the booming lawn and pool area without any idea who your designated partner would be.

“Is your ticket number 63?” A rather good looking, lean man towered over you as he suddenly asked.

You looked at the red ticket you’ve drawn earlier that read the exact number as he asked. “Yeah?”

The lean man tugged a somehow smaller man, one you could say that also was as dashing as the previous one. “Here she is man, told you you’re in for a treat. Bye, hyung!” The taller man with dimples you could swim in walked away laughing, leaving you and the smaller man alone.

“So, 63?” He asked with a smile, his small iridescent teeth and puffy cheeks making a notable appearance. You shyly nodded, noting that he also took the Angel part of the theme and he’s sporting a white short sleeved button down and white shorts.

“We uhm.. Kinda have to use this?” He raised his left hand that held cuffs, an act which you just chuckled to and agreed. He fixed the cuffs on your wrists and sat beside you on the kitchen counter.

“I’m Junmyeon, by the way. You?” You smiled at his pleasantries, his manner of speaking really spoke of class and formality. Not that you’re surprised as the college you’ve been in was almost considered to be for the elite and the wealthy. So you tried and respond with the same manner.

A silence filled with awkwardness filled the air between you and Junmyeon as everyone else unleashed their wild side around. The restroom was just adjacent to the kitchen and you just pretended that you don’t hear the filth going on inside.

“Oh dear that was strong.” You scrunch your face on the strong burning taste of alcohol on the punch you just drank. The unassuming fruity color packed a whole lot of kick down your throat.

“This? It’s not that strong.” Junmyeon responded beside you, gulping down his own glass serving of the punch.

“I’m not that good of a drinker.”

“Yeah, I noticed that you’re not much of a party goer.” He chuckled lightly, and the way his eyes disappear as it gets pushed by his cheeks was just a wonderful sight.

“I only got forced to go by my friends. They said it’s like a quintessential part of college, so here I am.” And then you remembered Haein and Ara, two of which you haven’t seen in the past hour. You turned your head around, looking for any signs of them.

“If your friends are the ones paired with Kris and Luhan, you won’t probably see them anywhere here right now.” Junmyeon downed another glass, lifting your cuffed hand along. You looked at him, baffled by the vagueness of what he said. “They’re probably upstairs, or maybe or maybe not here at all. You know, devils doing some devil things.”

“Oh.. yeah. I forgot that things happen very fast here.” You answered, sipping your straw for another sting just to hide your embarrassment. It’s been more than half an hour and you’ve just sat on a kitchen counter with Junmyeon, you thought that you’re probably boring him out. “I’m sorry that tonight may be pretty slow for you.”

“What?” His hands gripped the edges of the marble countertop, face turned to the side to look at you. “No, it’s not a problem. Don’t be sorry. I’m not interested in that.”

You weren’t able to help your face turn into a frown, to be blatantly rejected even before you took consideration of liking the man beside you. Sure, his wonderful appearance makes you flustered and shy, and you were more than interested to get to know him more.

“No, ugh. I didn’t mean that I wasn’t interested with you. I mean… hookups aren’t my thing. Slow is more kinda how I like it.” He said joyously before ending it with a wink which made your cheeks glow a bright shade of pink.

Unlike common romantic novels or narratives of college love, you didn’t hit it off with Junmyeon quickly afterwards. After the night of the mixer, which ended abruptly after some fratboys hitting the power supply with their illegal firecrackers, you seldomly saw Junmyeon. You found out that he was already a Junior, and he and his friends were a couple of frat members with great connections so they were able to sneak in at the party.

He wasn’t in the campus very often either. Rumor had it that he’s from a very rich family that runs a shipping conglomerate and that he takes units overseas. The very few instances that you ran into each other was only marked with a smile or politely calling each other’s names. Ara and Haein, who had bigger social circles than you, shared things that they learned about Junmyeon. Apparently, he majored in Business Management and was the only heir to their multi million business. And that he’s often considered too busy to date despite the few random flings he had just to keep himself a healthy young man.

It took another term before you got to connect with each other on social media, and you’d use the term connect very scarcely as he posts so little. Only a few posts about his recent trip to Paris, or the time he toured Italy.

College sinked in your skin too fast. You’ve dated around, you considered it to be an act of dipping your feet in the vast oceans. You had to be out of your comfort zone and you’re afraid of all the things you’ll regret trying.

It wasn’t even until your Junior year that you properly got to converse properly again with Junmyeon. You volunteered for an outreach in this student organization that required a lot of help to pack goods for the victims of a recent devastating storm. The long test week was over and you had a lot of free time, so you went and signed yourself up.

It’s still vivid in your memory how you only opted to wear a loose pullover and shorts. Not even bothering how you looked as comfort mattered most in working long hours of boxing food. You sat in the basketball gymnasium filled with busied people and stacks of instant ramen and canned goods. You sat down in front of a small box and started filling it with all the necessities, neatly stacking three cans of sardines and six packs of ramen inside with a bag of two kilos of rice. Silently, you finished box after box when you were suddenly interrupted by someone who sat beside you.

“Hey angel.”

“My name’s not ang-” You said as you turned your head to the perpetrator. Stopped immediately by the warm chocolate brown eyes that had contact with yours. “Oh, Junmyeon. Long time no see.”

“Yeah, senior year is really that busy.” He laughed as he sat down beside you and started packing his own boxes too.

“Why are you here then? Ah, you probably heard that I’ll be here so you went and signed up too eh?” You said in a teasing manner.

“Woah, where’s the slow and shy girl that I knew back at the mixer? College sure did change you.” Junmyeon said, which made the two of you laugh. “No, actually my father is one of the sponsors so, you know. It would just make sense for me to be here.”

“Okay, whatever Mr. Rich guy. Let’s just pack here so we can finish earlier, I have a lot of essays to write.”

The long hours flew by easily as you chatted with Junmyeon. It seemed like putting canned goods into boxes just went automatic on your hands as you lost yourself on the galaxy of his thoughts. He told you stories how he was mistaken as a celebrity in Italy, and the day he almost tripped off an ancient sculpture at Rome. Junmyeon had inserted a lot of jokes along the way, ones that you don’t think you’d laugh at if not for the budding interest you had for him. In return for his enthusiasm in sharing his stories, you told the narrative of you running into your roommates getting it on. Not understanding what it meant to have a sock on the door. And you sure do hope that the survivors of the recent floods would feel the extra love and happiness that filled along the boxes that you packed.

You thought that day would be very much like the mixer, nothing but an episode of sweet nothings. A wisp of memory that you’d look by after a few months or years and wonder why all he was is a fleeting fancy. No, this one was different for he asked your phone number after packing almost a hundred boxes. It was different because he called you that very night, asking if he could interest you to go out for dinner. It was different because Junmyeon was far different from all the flings you’ve encountered before him.

Junmyeon wasn’t the kind to be nervous for a date because it seemed as if he had everything planned down to the last detail. A fine silk void of creases and he left no room for mistakes. He picked you up at your dorm on the dot. He cleaned up very well with his exquisite dress shirt, obviously branded - probably even haute couture. He rolled up with his Benz, looking all shiny and polished. Junmyeon exuded so much calmness during the ride that you felt as if all the nerves were passed down to you. A perfect fit for a modern day prince, and you weren’t sure if you’re up to the task to be his modern day princess.

You should’ve expected the dinner to be far from normal, as he was far from an average person either. But not even in your hindsight did you expect for a rented vintage restaurant that mimicked Greek ruins, rose petals set the mood and candlelights illuminated the place. The grandiose of everything made you feel very little.

“I reckon that I’m way too overdressed for the occasion.” You noted with a light chuckle, trying to mask the pent up nervousness deep within you. The black vintage dress that you kept in your closet for very special events suddenly felt lacking.

“No, you look perfect. Everything else is just over the top, fault on my part.” And there was his endearing smile. “I just thought this was fitting for the daughter of a former politician.”

Your jaw dropped in shock, “How did you know?” It wasn’t very much of a secret but you tried and keep this fact on the down low.

“It wasn’t that hard to find out.”

Time seems to speed up whenever you’re with Junmyeon. You tried to cherish and savor each passing moment, you wish it were trinkets that you could pocket and save in a jar. The dinner was followed by subsequent ones, each more relaxed than before. The luxurious restaurant was traded for a movie night in his penthouse, still far from the ordinary but let’s be honest - is there even anything ordinary when it comes to someone as impeccable as Junmyeon?

The relationship itself, being committed to each other and official only came as a realization. It wasn’t marked by a wonderful proposal nor a question but rather an agreement. As if you just both come into terms that you’re comfortable with each other’s feelings enough to present the other as their partner.

It felt like Junmyeon has been a vital part of your life, his constant presence was almost a necessity. It wasn’t a toxic relationship but a rather very serene one, his friends almost consider you married. It wasn’t even far from thought, he asked for you to work in their company to be around you more often. An offer you couldn’t refuse for sure - you have your boyfriend beside you and a high paying job was a combination to die for.

Yet taking the job meant a compromise in your side. It was never part of your plans to work and settle down right after college, it was never in your sight. Harvard was the plan, you and your parents have known this ever since you were twelve. Take up Legal Management in one of the most prestigious universities in the campus, and then fly to the States to study in the most premier Law School one would consider. But that was far off from Junmyeon’s mind.

He wanted you to stay, here with him, be with him. He always would reason out that he’ll be able to provide what you need and more, to which you had no doubt. The Kim family probably had enough money to support up to five more generations, even with a lavish life. But to be a lawyer, a good and reputable one, has always been your dream.

But Junmyeon was your serendipity - a wonderful sudden discovery that made all else a blur. A sudden diamond on the way that made the hike for the pot of gold futile. So with him you stayed. As you couldn’t bear to break his heart and his own dreams, one that consisted of settling down with you he said. The thing about Junmyeon is he’s too idealistic and a hopeless romantic on the inside. He was very vocal on what he wanted on your wedding, about your children and how many. All of these fragile little gems that he cherished so much were on your hands, and you loved him so much at that time to crush it.

It was all smooth and tranquil until he started getting busier at work. It wasn’t even work that you understood as he kept on saying it was his father’s favor, who in turn started to grow weaker in health. He’s been flying from one country to another and back, sometimes even for weeks. What he was very busy about was kept unrecorded in the company. And you’ve started to question.

All it needed was an unassuming folder that lied on his work table for you to find out. Junmyeon was knocked out on the bed, too tired and wasted from proving how much he missed you due to his recent long trip. Curiosity got the best of you and you decided to put silence in all the questions that kept you awake at night.

But you would have rathered not look on the contents now that you read it.

Far from your anticipation of recent transactions of a new ship, probably an acquisition of new plane models to fasten shipping - it was the worst case scenario that you didn’t even knew was possible for a man like Junmyeon. To be fair, it was still shipping transcripts. But the contents were of the horrendous kinds, far from what you handled in his company that included family packages, beauty products or overall goods. These “products” were made for the worst members of human society, illegal weapons - those who could erase an entire locality with a press of a button. Guns of all sorts, those handheld and ones you thought was only issued for military use. Cocaine, LSD, methamphetamine, compounds that wouldn't have made much of a big deal in college but it sure does when it’s shipped in hundreds and thousands of kilograms.

And it was all undersigned by a certain SUHO.

Your mind quickly connected the dots. Whoever Junmyeon was doing this work for wasn’t necessarily the makers nor producers of the said equipment, they were simply shipping them. Making the impossible dirty work more than possible. And the shipping behemoth that the Kim’s family had was a sure fit for the job.

It all made sense. These certain container vans that were over the initial count that Junmyeon blatantly told you to disregard, saying that you were the one that made the wrong tally and count. The sudden emergency shippings that had to be made at midnight.

And you don’t know how to react.

This life was far from what you dreamt of, the righteous and abiding. Actually, this was the exact opposite of such. The defectors, rebellious, and one treacherous to mankind and life itself. You loved Junmyeon, but you definitely cannot accept this aspect of his life.

But you chose to not say a thing.

You were smarter than that, far more logical that just blurting out that you spied on his belongings while he was fast asleep after making you orgasm one after another. You knew that this would only lead to complications, probably even lose your life or your sanity if he knows that you’re aware.

So you planned your escape.

A handful of acceptable reasons was already jotted on your list. That he was too busy for you, that you wanted to go and pursue your dreams in Harvard, that you’ve been wanting to try something new in your life that doesn’t revolve around him because your life was with him and for him for the past two years. Even you tried so hard to make yourself believe that this was the reason that you’re leaving him. That it wasn’t because he’s living a dangerous and a life so wronged that you didn’t have it in your guts to be part of it.

That you wouldn’t ever want the growing life in your belly to take part of. No, the life that you’d give birth to wouldn’t only be another spawn to continue such a vicious act.

It took all your might and tears to leave. To watch him break down, and cry, and beg, and kneel in front of you only for you to turn your back on him on the very end. All his pleads and promises to spend more time and stay with you was all but a shout into the void as you still hopped on a plane fast to California to leave everything behind.

To break your own heart to stick to your morals, and to care for your coming bundle of joy.

And you wouldn’t let that all go to waste now, not now that you’ve worked so hard to be the best mother to Jaejin for the past 6 years. Not now that you beared everything alone, to depend on yourself starting at the age of 22 while raising another in your arms.

You arrive at the luxurious condominium, almost limping on the pain at the balls of your feet. You quickly dashed to the information desks and painlessly smiled at the attendants that looked so pleasant and formal towards you.

“Can I have a dial to room 52A, please.” You said as you plastered a forced smile on your face. Yet a sense of hurry was in your heart.

“I’m sorry, Ma’am. I’m not sure if you had the right room information, perhaps you’re trying to reach another unit please?” The attendant with caramel blonde hair and blue scarf responded to you with her pearly whites all displayed as a part of her job.

“No, It’s really for room 52A for Mr. Kim Junmyeon.” You reiterated yourself.

“Hold on for a second as I contact Mr. Kim if he’s expecting any visitors right now.” She politely responded once more as she grabbed the phone and talked in a shushed manner. “We’ve been informed that Mr. Kim is not in his room as of the moment, Ma’am.”

“Are you sure? I just.. I just really need to talk to him right now.” You tried to keep your composure.

“I’m pretty sure that Mr. Kim hasn’t been around the vicinity for the past few weeks. He’s probably residing in some of his other properties. Good day Ma’am.” She greeted you again with a smile before she entertained other guests.

Of course, Junmyeon would never be dumb. He’s too calculating of a person to sit with Jaejin here if he’ll hide your son from you. You lived here with him for a year, of course you’ll go here first. You scanned your memories for where else could he be, he probably had a thousand more houses or condominiums now but you’re left with no choice to stick with what you know.

So with hope in your hands, you headed off his old family home on the outskirts of the city.

The drive almost lasted half an hour, the village was meant only for the wealthiest of the wealthy. Just below the wondrous sight of the mountains yet still bearably close enough to the city center where their businesses would be. You remember it here, the lavish and aristocratic house that his parents owned. The one with marbled walls and doric columns and topped off with an exquisite fountain on the dead center. If they weren’t here, you might as well count the number of stars in the sky and sands on the beach as that’s how hard it would take to find them.

Guards clad in black scanned you, they phoned inside to ask if a visitor was expected. If they were this intricate on searching you, Junmyeon was probably inside. And Jaejin would hopefully be, too.

Surprisingly to you, the condescending gates were opened and you were let inside the Kim Estate. Guards ushered you inside, not bothering to speak as small talk wasn’t the reason you rushed here for. You just wanted to see your son, happy, and alive, to alleviate all the worries in your mind.

The living area was nothing short of exquisite, large antiquette sofa sets lined with white leather ornate the room. The grand staircase almost looked like something off fantasy movies. The whole mansion just reeked of immense power and wealth just like what Junmyeon exudes. All this glitter and glamour and all you’re searching for was the jolly laughter and toothless smile of your son.

“Mama!” You hurriedly looked on your left, where Jaejin emerged from the kitchen wearing a smile. With open arms, you almost ran into his embrace. The thud of your heart was almost as loud and booming of that of a thunderstorm. Almost squishing your son at the tightness of your embrace. “Uncle Jun brought me here, he said that we’ll make cupcakes and have more pistachio ice cream!”

“Oh he did?” You tried to laugh along his happiness, how innocent he was on just how you almost died of worry and anxiety over the past two hours. The tears that fell down your eyes cannot be held back, the wave of emotions that you felt just won’t subside.

“Why are you crying mama? Do you want a cupcake too?” He willingly offered to you the chocolate pastry on his hand, you just shook your head no.

“Nothing, Mama was just very tired at work today, Jaejin. I’m just very happy to see you.”

“Aw, I don’t like seeing my Mama sad. Is your new boss bad? Should I make him face the wall, mama? I don’t like seeing you cry.” Jaejin tried to wipe the tears that fell down your eyes, even blowing it a little in attempt to make it dry.

You just wanted to hold your son for a little longer, just memorize how warm he feels to your touch. How his giggles sound and how he cares for you like no one else would ever do. Because the past two hours just made you realize that Jaejin has been and is now your life, and it would kill you to lose him on your sight.

You saw a silhouette walk towards the both of you from the kitchen, donning a white work shirt and slacks. And you stood up from your seat and cleared your throat as you shot him your most threatening look. Lowering your head once more, you talked to Jaejin “Go ahead and have more cupcakes, bunny. Me and Uncle Jun have something to talk about.” Jaejin gave you a sweet peck on the cheek before joyfully prancing to the kitchen again.

You shared a look with Junmyeon and you knew just what will transpire between the both of you.

He started walking towards the study to which you followed suit. The environment was closed enough and you could lash out all your frustrations toward this man without worrying that Jaejin will hear you. You entered first and you quickly turned back to him once he closed the door.

“What the fuck, Junmyeon!?” Your hand smashed against the hard oak wood of the table, creating a loud thud that resonated within the space. “You’d really kidnap Jaejin from me? I thought we agreed on how we’ll do this?”

“I never officially agreed on anything, Y/N. And kidnapping? How will I kidnap my own child? If there’s someone who hid Jaejin away it was you!” He was still relatively calm besides the fact that his voice raised a few volumes up.

“That’s out of the damn topic, Junmyeon! You just took him without me knowing and you even emptied all his things in our apartment. Who the fuck in the right mind pulls stunts like those?”

“I was just trying to protect him! You’re the one here risking him, always leaving him alone anywhere. First he was lost in a large mall, now he’s left alone in a daycare for hours. Tell me, are you even competent enough to be a mother if you put your son in all these kinds of danger?” You gasped at his accusation.

“I, alone, raised Jaejin for six fucking years, Junmyeon. Just because you have all this money and wealth doesn’t mean you’re so much of a better person than me.” You pointed at him, “Besides he’s only ever in danger because of you, Junmyeon. So don’t go and put the blame on me.”

“What? Now suddenly I’m the bad guy. I barely knew Jaejin for a week and I’m the one putting him in danger?” His tone finally changed.

“Jaejin is always in danger because he’s your son, Junmyeon.”

“If you’re talking about being in danger because I’m rich, that fails to make any sense as I can afford all the protection he deserves.” Junmyeon reasoned out, walking to the other side of the table.

“No, he’s in danger because of what you do. He’s in danger because of all these people that surrounds you and your job, Junmyeon. Stop playing innocent because I know that you aren’t, Suho.” You dropped the bomb you’ve been carrying for years, Junmyeon’s mouth was now wide and agape on the sudden revelation.

“What? What are you talking about?” He stuttered

“Come on, Junmyeon. Stop playing fucking games. You say Jaejin is in danger? That's because your whole life revolves on playing with fire and walking on thin ice. Dealing and transferring all this bad shit known to mankind all over the globe.Having an army protect all the kinds of the worst people, protecting these killers. What parent in the world would not be frantic over their child’s safety if they’re running an illegal business guised as a shipping company.” Trembling was present in your hands, you don’t know how long the strength you feigned would put up with all the fear that’s deep inside your heart.

“What… How? When?” Was all the barely audible musings that fell out of Junmyeon’s lips. You turned away, in attempt to leave. But you’ve barely even reached the study’s doors when he spoke again.

“You can’t leave. Not anymore.”

“Why? Because I know how pungent your life is, Junmyeon? Would you kill me because I know what breed of asshole you are?” You felt your eyes as they started to water, tears slowly trickling down your face for the umpteenth time for today.

“No. Because Jaejin’s not leaving here. If you want to see your son, you stay here with him. If you want to leave, I’ll make sure this is the last time you’ll ever land your eyes on him.”

[theros]

i often blacklist things that i am so, so tired of seeing on my dash, usually memes or just media i’m not really interested in (but don’t want to unfollow the person over because they also post a lot of stuff i do enjoy).

all the memes treating the crewmates as like. a pet creature and calling their species “amogus” or “amongus”, or looking at any random image and seeing a crewmate outline somewhere, are why i specifically blacklisted that one lmao, my dash was flooded. i actually love the game and fan content for it! i just got tired of the memes lmao

i haven’t seen many memes that actually use the phrase “among us”, so i never had to blacklist that, but the short version was everywhere.

i am haunted by that spamton though

was wondering why i wasn't seeing any other art posted by you today and finally went to your blog in a different window and realized it's because everything but the Jen piece has a word i've blacklisted with tumblr savior (in this specific case, amogus and deltarune) 😭 i'm sorry Psii

wait why do you have amogus specifically blacklisted. as just a variant of among us or specifically amogus the permutation of the phrase among us

also ngl I wouldn't recommend seeing that spabton drawing anyway it's! it's sure something I don't actually know Why I drew it

[likeawildthing]

putting all the anons in one post because they are all cool, but i can’t flood my dash with forty asks!!! these are all so amazing omg. 

this is weird but my low-key superpower is making random insignificant predictions that come true? like 'leave home early there'll be a traffic jam' and 'you're going to get experiment 9 for your exam' but the predictions are never for me? and only happen when I'm not thinking. 

amazing

Regarding the secret super powers!! My brother's godmother can always find a parking space no matter how busy it is. even if people have had to leave the car park and they couldn't find a space, as soon as she pulls into the car park someone will be leaving and pulling out a space so she can park. 

car parking space wizard is a legit skill to have

im really really good at fucking things up at one go. flawlessly, incorrigibly fucking things up. 

you and me both buddy

Mundane superpowers: I have an uncanny ability to guess the next song on the radio and win trivial luck-based games 

i love this

One of my proudest tiny superpowers is , 9 times out of 10, I can guess the time within a 5 minute window. Even waking up from a nap or just waking up, no alarm, I can do it. I will admit, the time changes and the changing day light can trip me up a bit for a week or two, but then I adjust and it’s just as accurate as ever. 

i also have this skill and it’s my fave

If you’re still doing tiny super powers, I’ve always been really good at singing along to songs I don’t know very well. My mom asked me about it once and all I could say was “I just sing what rhymes and makes the most sense.” Also, while entirely useless, on almost multiple daily occurrences the song that is about to come on, 1 or sometimes 2 songs down the line, pops right into my head. Even on the radio, I’ll have a song in my head and turn on the car to find it just starting. 

the best ones are generally useless though? so many to do with music!

Little super powers- I can get any baby to fall asleep within 10 minutes no matter how cranky/ over tired/ sick that child is. I think I must have a very soothing rocking/ bouncy walk. Also, I'm weirdly good at standardized test. I can usually just tell which answers are wrong. This was great in high school and significantly less useful in grad school.

i do not have the skill to soothe babies and i envy yours

I’m convinced I have some sort of timing superpower. I get into/become aware of media things just in time. Decide to watch a cult classic 80s movie and get into it a week before the announcement that it’s getting a broadway adaptation. Decide to check twitter again after forever just in time to load the page and literally watch Ed Sheeran come back from his isolation to announce the new album. Check out and get into an old band I’ve vaguely heard of...days before the reunion tour announcement.

lmao that’s cool

You know the voice in that back of your head that goes “haha what if this mildly bad thing happened”? Mine just seems to be right too often + in the weirdest situations. Example- I was going to a game at school and had a fleeting thought “maybe i should change. Wouldn’t it be funny if I wore the outfit I happened to be wearing all day and that ended up being the color of the other team. Lol that would be funny.” And then of course that is in fact what happens. Coincidence? Ya probably but idk 

it sounds like you have great intuition tbh

    My lttle superpower is somehow having just enough obscure knowledge for whatever ridiculous situation my friends and I get in. 

you are the Most Valuable Friend

    oh, also, i am really good at drawing straight lines. like i never use a ruler to draw straight lines because they always turn out super straight. i'm weirdly good at drawing perfect circles and triangles, too, which really came in handy once i started taking geometry! :D 

GEOMETRY WIZARD

if i hear any piece of music/melody, i'll never forget it. when i watch tv with my family and i recognize a piece of obscure soundtrack/background music, i'll immediately recognize it, hum along, and identify where it's from. family members won't believe me until i find the original music on youtube and play it to them. i never forget.

i love that so many of these are musically minded!!

my superpower is, i can hold my breath underwater up to like four mins on average, five is my record. :D 

holy shit

my superpower is getting those around me to smile and feel happy. i am the person that is called and texted when things are sad because i am, as one friend put it, "sunshine funneled into a person"

My lowkey superpower is oven timing. A solid 90% of the time, if I am cooking something in the oven, I will get the urge to walk to the kitchen and see if it's done, and it's usually within 15 seconds of being correct, sometimes around 45. However, I feel it's pretty useless because that's the exact function of the oven timer itself :c

PLEASE COME BAKE COOKIES @ MY HOUSE

My lowkey super power: Stealth. I have unintentionally scared a lot of people, some of them multiple times because I just don’t make much noise when I walk and then I’ll just be in the same vicinity as them and I’ll say something and they just jump out of their skin. I’ve taken to knocking on walls as if they’re doors when I enter a room. Or sometimes I’ll intentionally stomp as I approach so I don’t have to deal with shrieks of surprise.

i love that you have to KNOCK ON WALLS to announce that you’re there

dk if it counts but I'm really good at reading and listening to music at the same time and then hearing a unique word as I'm reading it (instead of just like "a" or "the")

i’m not sure i follow? like a unique word from the book is in the song?

My superpowers are that I have a horrible memory generally but have an uncanny memory for fun facts I always have one handy for pretty much any situation, and I dream about places I've never been to before then forget the dream soon after I wake up and then go to the place years later and have a flashback to the whole dream

i have had dreams about places so specific and familiar that i 100% feel like i’ve either been to before or i will eventually visit

[meanderfall]

Don't worry about taking some time to respond, the fact that you reply at all (and always with so much!) always makes my day! I didn't mean to imply that Caboose was an adult because he's dangerous, sorry about that! Ask boxes are just so small and I try not to flood you with too many, but it makes me lose some nuance. By pointing out that he was dangerous I was also trying to say he was competent, and was referring back to how the BCG tend to treat Caboose like he's harmless and helpless. [1/5]

[2/5] I'm a little sensitive to infantilization because a lot of people do it to me when they find out I'm autistic, so I'll admit it might just be me reading too deep into the little things, like how all the motivational speeches leave Caboose out ("And Caboose... er, it's good to see you?"). And how in Chorus he's given a toy gun because they think he has no impulse control, and no one ever expects him to have good ideas or be competent at anything despite doing/being both on a regular basis.

[3/5] But mostly what I meant when I said they don't treat him like an adult is that they treat him like he's an 'emotional timebomb' when he's not. It definitely comes from a place of caring, but they don't trust him to be able to handle hard truths. It's fine that they try to spare him some grief, but they don't give anyone else the same courtesy which implies that they think he - the one commonly described by fans and writers as innocent and childlike or as a "manchild" - needs to be coddled.

[4/5] And for sure a lot of Temple/Alpha treating Caboose like they do everyone comes from being assholes! Temple absolutely said it because Grif tried to defend Caboose when the implications of the recording failed to hurt him like it did the rest of them. But he's also not wrong that people tend to treat Caboose like he's fragile when he's probably the most emotionally resilient of the BGC. Which wouldn't be a problem narratively if Caboose wasn't also the only one with obvious brain trauma...   

[5/5] Also, the Director says in that flashback that they're the only team who's remained at a stalemate and that everything should be recorded so that they can recreate it (I can't tell if he wanted that composition for all future sim teams or just on an as needed basis though). I took this to mean that when he later decided to place Alpha somewhere safe he specifically chose people similar to the BvRs so that there would be another stalemate and therefore little chance of him being harmed.

You’re back!!! ^v^ Sorry, I immediately put all the asks under a readmore because I feel bad about clogging up dashes, but I also feel like they should be here in case anyone else wants to read these and understand what’s going on.

And omg don’t ever feel bad about sending me entire essays!!! I absolutely adore it!!! It makes me so happy, honestly, send in as many asks as you want, send in so many that you need several days to get it all in because you hit ask limit, it seriously makes my day

And, yeah, ask boxes are way too small, nuances get lost so easily when you’re trying to shove in all the necessary information in them :/ I sort of figured that you might have meant it in the sense that Caboose is actually competent in a fight and doesn’t need coddling, but the phrasing just immediately sent up red flags, so I wanted to address that point just in case. I’m sorry if that made you feel bad! I meant no offense.

I think you have some serious good points (to the point I’m not even sure I can add anything??? I’m mostly sitting here, like “yup, that’s true, they do do that don’t they”) and tbh I don’t think you’re being oversensitive to it or reading too much into it. And even if you were, it’s not a bad thing. Lord knows we all have something, a sore spot, a behaviour or cliche or situation that when it happens in media it hits something seriously personal or traumatic and just affects how you see things and feel when you watch it. (Tbh, I’ve recently encountered that sort of thing while playing a video game (which isnt fun bc i now dislike a character that everyone adores) and then again in the season 2 finale of Camp Camp.) So, like. I get you. 

(I don’t remember the specific circumstance with the toy gun in Chorus and then the eventual implantation of Freckles in the gun, but I kind of read it as them doing it to prevent team kills??? Or is that part of the problem, that it’s running gag that he kills people when trying to help them?)

You know, I laughed during the emotional time bomb scene, specifically Wash’s ‘jesus christ’ afterwards, but taking a step back to think about it, you’re right. Caboose is probably the farthest one from being an emotional time bomb. Pretty sure Wash in s6-s8, Carolina in s9-10, and Tucker in s15 have the dubious honour of being titled with such a moniker. 

Caboose is easily the healthiest one when it comes to emotions, because he actually lets himself feel them and express them properly. And he tries sharing what he’s feeling. Tbh, imo, he’s probably one of the strongest person emotionally, and I admire him so much for it?? Like his guide to making friends, when he finishes it with ‘but you can always make more. And that’s pretty neat’, I’m personally blown away that he’s able to keep such a positive outlook, like lmao im sitting here getting absolutely run-down and exhausted from making and losing friends all the time and not wanting to bother anymore, and Caboose is there like “my heart got broken, but that’s okay! Spending time with you helps me fix it up again, I’m really happy we’re friends.” How even??? Caboose, can I be you???

They coddle him. And he doesn’t need to be. He’s pretty smart and competent, and he’s handled so many emotional ups and downs like a champ. Maybe not always in the healthiest ways, but he eventually got better.

(Random thought, but do you remember that scene where Wash picks him up in s6 for his team, and the Captain like takes Caboose aside to tell him to never come back and Caboose is like “Never walk backwards”? Wouldn’t it be hilarious if Caboose actually did understand completely what he said, and all the other times in other explanations like that, but said something completely off the wall just to fuck with them? Or maybe not. Idk)

Isn’t it common fanon that Caboose’s brain trauma occurred when Omega, Tex and Alpha, three AIs, went inside his head and fucked around in there? It’s always kind of interesting to look back to s1 and see how much they’ve changed. Pretty sure Caboose and Donut suffered the most from flanderization...

This discussion is really great tbh, because now I’m honestly getting upset at how people treat Caboose in universe. I love it when my point of view and opinions of characters get changed.

Oh, really that happened with the Director? I must’ve missed it. I always assumed that the Director didn’t have much if any input with what happened with Alpha, mainly because he was either being put on tribunal and needed plausible deniability or, way more likely, he was on the run already. Admittedly, the timeline is confusing?? Is the Director and the Counselor still active throughout s1-s6? They are right? Is the Director actually keeping an eye on Alpha then?? But then how come he let the other AI fragments and Tex, all of which were on the run from PFL, go into Blood Gulch and interact with Alpha? The RvB timeline is awful and filled with so many questions and I hate that so much, but I also love it because that means we can have fun with headcanons and stuff.

I have no idea about if he recreated it on purpose then. Because, with the episodes on s14, I thought Florida was just purposely finding the laziest and most incompetent people he could to prevent Alpha from being harmed, I thought that’s all there was to it. Do you think Florida could’ve been made aware of the Blues and Reds?? Or maybe the Counselor told him. Also, I kind of assumed that the sim bases were supposed to have all kinds of different situations and circumstances so that the Freelancers could be challenged with different scenarios.

(An aside, isn’t the whole sim thing kind of fucked up for the Freelancers though? Because, I’m like 99% sure that being sent into such scenarios where everyone else around them is considered incompetent by the average soldier, never mind Freelancers, probably 1) encourages them to think of themselves as better, upping their arrogance 2) makes them think that they really might be the best if not the only ones who can win the war, adding a shit-ton of pressure and 3) makes them think more fondly of their team, the Freelancers, tightening their bonds, and then the Director purposefully broke those bonds, and instead of it just being a team not meshing well, it becomes betrayal, and heartbreak, and trauma. and that’s not even going into how the sim troopers feel, a bunch of people who either volunteered to help, or signed up to try and better themselves, or who were drafted, all being used in the sick games of a man with a sick mind, and being essentially useless for the war effort. Nice going, Director) (lmao talking about him makes me want to finally make that gifset idea i have for him)

(also???? you like hearing me ramble about things??? what is this, is this reality, what is going??? thank you, that really makes me so happy you have no idea