#i only rly communicate online and it's so surface level

[christianborle]

what do you do if you are starting to get frustrated with the friend group you are in but don’t have any other friends to turn to or hang out with besides this one friend group that you need a break from

[smalltragedy]

* ryan destiny, cis woman + she/her | you know kira blake, right? they’re twenty four, and they’ve lived in irving for, like, ever? well, their spotify wrapped says they listened to babooshka by kate bush like, a million times this year, which makes sense ‘cause they’ve got that whole lazily stretched out in a ray of light, daisy shaped irises and daisy chain braids, performing an intricate dance to move the ocean's waves thing going on. i just checked and their birthday is october 31st, so they’re a scorpio, which is unsurprising, all things considered. ( james, 22, est, they/them )

hllo ive hd kira in my head fr a bit bt i also know ntohing abt her! this is me winging it even though i hv no right to <3 this is my third character maybe whose birthday is in honor of ella n coincidentally 2/3 of them r in this rp. yea im messy smirks sexily.

DEATH, GRIEF, DRUGS TW

mini playlist.

wuthering heights ;; kate bush / babooskha ;; kate bush / dreams ;; fleetwood mac / california dreamin’ ;; the mamas & the papas / lavender moon ;; haroula rose / time of the season ;; the zombies / after the storm ;; kali uchis / left hand free ;; alt-j / always forever ;; cults / wait a minute! ;; willow / your dog ;; soccer mommy.

statistics.

full name: kira blake

nickname(s): keely.

birthday: october 31st, 1996.

zodiac: scorpio sun, cancer moon, aquarius ascending. 

mbti & temperament: esfp & catalyst / sanguine. 

label: the ebullient.

sexuality: bisexual.

pinterest.

biography.

born to two original hippies which hs pretty much set up who kira is fr the rest of her life <3 the type of ppl who didnt like the boundaries of marriage n held off frm it fr as long as possible until theyd hd a spur of the moment elopement involving a celebrity impersonator at fannie’s <3 yea theyre lesbians lets go <3

nvr rly took things srsly until kira ws like 5 yrs old n then they were like ah gee ah fuck we probably shld probably settle settle. n they job hopped n worked many odd jobs until they found their footing in careers they liked n one of them probably does like. blown glass art. n the other prob fixes old computers n other ~vintage~ mementos of the past fr ppl.

they make a decent living n they live in delpinius heights n they try a few times fr another kid bt it nvr rly works out (raises an eyebrow. adopted siblings anyone?) n fr the most part kira as a child spends her time running around town and tugging on the hem of other’s shirts to ask them small favors (mostly to play a game with her)

often left unsupervised as a kid, bt not in the way tht her parents dnt care (bc her parents love her a lot a lot a lot like she is their world) bt in the way tht they simply raised her the way they were raised. running amuck all day n coming home jst in time fr dinner, front porch light always on, cat always waiting faithfully on their stoop.

pretty evident frm a young age tht kira’s mind saw things differently, in a different light - the world an array of light n mystery n sound n taste n sometimes those collided n created new experiences. prob hs some form of synsthesia bt dnt ask me which one yet. she’s a painting prodigy with an excellent understanding of color theory.

always ws known as a kind of like. rambunctious kid. a well meaning class clown who cld nt keep her mouth shut fr the life of her. grew up constantly with a yellow card beneath her name in school bt ws always well liked by her teachers n classmates alike.

jst a very bright child who did well naturally bt always ws turned more towards art.

feel like her parents very noticeably turned a cheek when she started smoking weed w the cool older kids when she ws 13. the type of person who wnts 2 b liked so bad she’d jump over a hurdle fr it. hs jumped over many hurdles n many fences n many other obstacles to be liked bt does it without breaking a sweat.

(edit: nw tht i think abt it hwevr i dnt think she does tht anymore i think while a bit of a mess atm she. likes herself. n doesnt rly want or need the approval of others anymore she jst does her own little thing. bt when she ws younger? she jst wnted 2 b friends w the entire world.)

nothing bad rly happened fr like. a good bit of her life. got into psychedelics at some point in high school n tht only heightened her artistic abilities. most of her high school art portfolio ws probably done while high bt <3 does it matter.

hd a high school sweetheart n they were pretty serious like. full on in love. a total believer of soulmates kira ws jst like. this is the one. there is nobody else i cn imagine my life with.

death tw

death tw

death tw.

death n grief tw // yea. sometime during their freshmen year of college. car incident. kira ws nvr the same though she’d like to pretend tht nothing’d ever happened. like theyd nvr existed. like she didnt plan out their entire lives together hiking thru hills n valleys n boating across various bodies of water n traveling together until they were old n wrinkly. end of death tw //

cld nt explain 2 u why kira hd bought a van n completely demolished it only to drain all of her savings remodeling it bt nw she lives in it by the beach. hd dreams of travelling the world bt cannot go long distances in a car without feeling sick. sees planes n feels envy. stopped painting fr a long time bt she’s started back up recently. took on surfing. told her parents tht it ws fine n tht she ws fine n theyre concerned bt shes always by the beach, her van rarely leaves. she’s trying her best bt its only been a few yrs n i think ppl cn sense tht shes jst nt the same cheerful girl as they once knew. end of grief tw //

anyways. tugs on my collar. tht’s kira! she lives on the beach n surfs everyday n is obsessed with daisies n is prob growing her own shrooms somewhere. 

personality & facts.

always been very emotional n a little dramatic. nt a drama queen bt is a little messy n does not hv like. many rational thoughts up in there. very cup full or cup empty.

regardless though she hs an. overall reputation fr jst being. enjoyable to be around. her her little moments bt shes also pretty like. laidback. in a way. KDSHFSDLKHGHFLKSD

prob bc she smokes a lot or is often <3 on a trip if u know wht i mean <3

god. got obsessed with the 60s n 70s aesthetic at some point n hs not gone back evr. big fan of psychedelic rock. is a prodigy painter bt her life dream outside of traveling ws always to own her own record label. hs nt happened yet, maybe will never happen? works at a record shop though n does hide the good vinyls tht she wants away frm the customers.

very cheerful n usually uplifting n she doesnt like to b negative around others bt smtms she cnt control it n smtms thinks tht ppl r out 2 get her jst out of. anxiety. hs long bouts where she’ll sit in a still sort of sadness n then shake out of it n hop back into conversation like nothing’s happened bt. its fine we’re fine kira is fine.

shes not gullible or naive bt wants to believe tht everybody hs a heart of gold even if its false. keeps giving ppl second chances bc she hs a savior complex n thinks she cn change ppl.

is very into zodiac n will judge u by ur chart. knows everybody in town’s natal chart. even newcomers. it’s a little scary hw quick she finds this information bt its very important to her.

kind of like. into spirituality bt i wont lie its very surface level n a little superficial. learning tarot cards bt cannot fr the life of her memorize the meanings so smtms she jst makes up things on the spot. hs so many crystals she will not stop buying them.

i think a part of her is desperately trying to cling onto tht like. think positive. self care. msg thts super prevalent online without addressing or actually helping any of her problems. it is her flaw </3

hates to admit when she needs help. wld rather do everything herself.

head is a little in the clouds n her parents r a little concerned fr her bc shes nt rly doing much rn bt like. she jst needs time i think. shes jst doing her little thing.

does not give up on ppl easily she absolutely hates dropping ppl frm her life even if she grows 2 resent them over time which is bad bc she is bad at hiding when she is upset at someone or when she doesnt like someone.

like shes jst passive aggressive abt it n does not properly communicate <3

bt this is rare i think ... negative feelings abt other ppl

self centered bt not selfish if tht makes sense. she will do things fr others without a problem n sometimes trips over herself 2 do it bt at the end of the day i think she cares abt herself the most.

hs only been in love once bt hs hd many infatuations n many like. admirations n very surface level feelings. her body is a temple n she loves 2 b worshipped.

prob does fkn. beach yoga. probably vegan bt also maybe breaks tht every once in a while. almost noncommittal its hard 2 distinguish between her being carefree, not taking care of herself, or jst hving commitment issues? flaky or not? who knows.

feels jst a bit too strongly bt tries to contain it. jst full of multitudes or smth. idk. icon <3

like. cares bt doesnt care. does thinks tht r purposely self destructive n then acts like shes like. cool girl monologue frm gone girl. bt does it while being like peace n luv on earth x

ok thts all i hv goodbye

wanted plots.

a pseudonym 2 fool ‘em... ;; jst hd this idea pop up bt i like the idea of kira going undercover 2 expose cheaters. whether she does this on her own accord or is personally requested by smbdy is up in the air. a plottable point. she h8s cheaters n is chaotic good she prob thinks shes the relationship vigilante testing the strengths of other’s relationships. once again she cld b. specifically going undercover fr smbdy 2 help them out. im sure she wldnt go 2 very. extensive srs measures like actually. sleeping w the assumed-cheaters bt once again. world is our oyster n i lov drama?

crystal visions ... ;; once again. shes super into crystals n astrology n she will base sm of her opinions of others on it. this is nt just abt her being judgmental of others bt also jst. catching her running around in the rain trying sooo hard 2 fkn. charge her crystals in the rainwater bc she forgot 2 charge them under the full moon the night b4. this is her giving wrong tarot readings. she hs no idea wht shes doing at any given time bt acts like she does know. acts like she knows the entire world. she gives crystals as gifts n will do ur natal chart for u bt will also pack her things n leave if ur a capricorn.

time of the season... ;; i dnt knw admittedly. this song’s abt being horny so perhaps? perhaps. kira isnt rly able to keep a grasp on long term relationships rn due to. factors in her life so she hops frm person 2 person often. smtms jst flings smtms its jst a relationship accidentally led on. shes noncommittal n a little flaky atm when she’s usually ride or die fr others. perhaps this is all in the name of some good fun! world? oyster. 

literally anything .dsfskhdkgs ;; god. shes so new i jst dnt know. childhood friends. current friends. friends shes hd frever. enemies n ex lovers n ppl shes constantly pushing away or scorned lovers or both or anything?? she pushed them out of the roller rink to make more room fr herself or maybe they did tht to her. perhaps theyre both constantly pursuing some sort of fkn. meaning in their lives tht they cnt quite grasp. mayb they go on an acid trip together. who knows. 

[anyhao-archived]

1OFAKIND

9 member boy group

debut song: DUNK IT!

debut album: welcome to 1nderland

members:

mattie (16)

dancer, vocal, maknae, ‘02 line

energetic & hyper; cute & charismatic

still in school + incredibly short but still growing

drama queen & loves bothering RBF a lot

doesn’t speak any english despite his english (stage) name

the main advocate to get a cat. when they go to the shelter he doesn’t even bother going in the dog section. he goes straight to the cats and is literally the epitome of the “pls mom can we get him :(((” cliche while showing a cat to the CEO

he likes to joke that his only skill is cooking pizza rolls to absolute perfection. everyone knows that is a LIE but its funny so.

nathaniel (16)

dancer, rapper, speaks basic spanish, ‘02 line

mischief twin with mattie (though nathaniel’s a little eviler, and less hyper) the other members can’t leave them alone for a minute (like that 1 scene in community where the guy goes to get the pizza and a minute later the apartment is on fire) -- yeah.

calls the CEO “mom” jokingly until he slips up and means it

dropped out of school but getting his GED slowly. takes online classes and jack +suhyun help him

the first to volunteer for brightly colored hair (he gets the bright blue that vav’s ace had in dance with me)

suhyun (18)

vocal, composer, can play piano and guitar, born in 2000

soft, sweet and polite boy. well liked by everyone

he gives off the impression of being shy and quiet but he’s really not. he just waits for the right moment to roast someone. its not that he’s shy he just. really doesnt have much to say. when he does, though, everyone listens to him. more often than not its a quip at another member

speaks english pretty well, almost fluent

literal aegyo king. he looks so soft and sweet he’s already cute, but when he does puppy eyes and asks jaeyong/the CEO for something they immediately give in to him. he uses it for bad & selfish reasons, and refuses to do it on command (like on shows)

self proclaimed fashionista, gets irritated with the members when they purposely dress bad

the second to volunteer for colored hair (gets a dark red/burgundy)

haeyoung (19)

power vocal, dancer, 2nd leader, born in 1999

helps jack with choreographing

drama queen (part 2) always tries to one up mattie

even despite the rivalry to be dramatic, he LOVES mattie. he loves all the younger members, which is why he’s elected as 2nd leader -- to be an advocate for the younger members who sometimes perhaps don’t have the courage to complain to the hyungs

he loves dogs but animals don’t seem to like him. 

one day he gets fed up with being ignored by daisy and dramatically falls to the ground in the practice room floor and whines about daisy hating him. one of the members kick him to get up but he refuses. daisy slowly comes over, as if sensing his distress, and licks him on his face.

to this DAY he maintains that he did not cry, the members are all slandering him! from then on, though, daisy sleeps on haeyoung’s bottom bunk bed with him

he’s recently got his driver’s license but no one likes to be in the car with him. he’s literally a mess and no ones sure how he got the license

he followed the hair color trend: a light, cotton candy pink color

he LOVES SPARKLES!!!! always asks for sparkles in his makeup. his aegyo skill is second only to suhyun. haeyoung always just. GOES for it. he’s less pleading and more cutesy high voice pitch. half the members cringe, and half of them love it. the one who seems to enjoy it the most though is jaeyong, surprisingly.

minchan (20)

vocal, dancer, and visual, ‘98 line

dumb and dumber with wooyoung. (minchan is the dumber) literally never knows what’s going on. tends to get lost, and if wooyoung is there, wooyoung’s lost too. jaeyong finds them and drags them back by their collars

though he’s mainly a vocal, he’s a wonderful dancer, too. he’s got (some) background in ballet, which makes his dancing perfect for this group

an amazing artist and incredibly creative. he designs their album designs and helps with photography. he’s also incredible at makeup and loves to do members’ makeup. sometimes he teams up with suhyun to give a full makeover to one of the members -- makeup, hair, outfit, etc. their victim is usually haeyoung or jack.

a dog person, came up with daisy’s name

he’s got light brown hair, and he makes sure to make it fluffy every day

he prides himself on learning certain niche skills. he’s first aid and cpr certified. he can also knit! he’s also the best cook in the dorm (not the only one, but certainly the best)

wooyoung (20)

dancer, rapper, knows basic english, ‘98 line

loves dogs & is best friends with minchan. he’s the dumb portion of the dumb & dumber duo, even though both of them really aren’t idiots

HIMBO!!! like he is kind of dumb (in a good way at least) and he’s the one who posts the most selfies. he enjoys stripping and ripping off his shirt

he likes to edit videos, and learns how to compose from suhyun. he’s the one members go to if they’re having tech issues.

somehow, he is a technology nerd but also a gym rat?? he’s THAT GUY who takes gym selfies and meanwhile jaeyong’s in the background with his shirt off lmao

he’s the actor of the group. if there’s an offer to be in a drama or whatever he’d be the first to be picked

also has background in dance! more street style though, like pop/locking or bboying. when he and minchan work together their dancing is beautiful. almost like art in its own form

BJ -- aka: RBF (21)

stable vocal, dancer, face of the group, ‘97 line

doesn’t like to be touched

dramatic, but not drama queen type. more like draping himself over pieces of furniture in silk outfits while there’s candles barely lighting the old room

has black hair that needs a trim, always wearing black clothes, bracelets, etc. (like the cliche emo in middle school in 2009)

what a fucking MESS! he’s always cheating during games and refusing to move/work out more than strictly necessary. 

his stage name is literally BJ (their CEO thought it was funny, and he was always like ??? until jack told him what that means in English LOL and he’s SO SCANDALZIED! he’s that member who does a solo interview while the rest are off fuckin’ around. he does an entire vlive for this one rant. hes like, hey guys. now i know why you all laughed when i was introduced. jack told me what bj means in english! so im gonna change my stage name. i like the idea of letters. what do you guys think of rbf?’

‘you know what that stands for, too, right?’

of course! resting bitch face! don’t you think that suits me? nd thats how he goes from bj to rbf. their ceo thinks rbf is hilarious, too

he seems aloof but he actually has a lot of emotions. he tends to rant about anything, and jack’s the only one who rly listens to him.

he’s closest with suhyun, bc hes the only member who seems to understand him more than at a surface level. basically they’re a yin/yang type of friends

is very happy with his appearance. he likes being that dancer with swaying hips and lifting his shirt up. sexy dance! 

jack (21)

rapper, fluent in english, choreographer, ‘97 line

closest with jaeyong (they were together at a different company before)

quiet, responsible, and well liked

makes sure all members are heard and understood. he also teaches them english (especially mattie)

basically: hes the long suffering mother type and lives in the bedroom with mattie and nathaniel to watch over the mischief twins

probably the most intelligent but doesnt act like it. kind of a nerd and wears glasses, but he’s ... well built. looks good. hes basically the “hot nerd” with flannel and beanies cliche

his only downfall is he’s extremely unlucky. everything he touches breaks or falls apart lmao. like, he’s the tallest member and gives off ‘rough’ vibes but. he’s constantly tripping, or falling down stairs. however the members know better than to laugh at him lol they’ve seen him angry.

‘im not angry. im just disappointed’ the rest of the group: WE ALL KNOW THATS WORSE!

maknae line (mattie, nathaniel, and suhyun) are constantly following him around like little ducklings. it comes natural to mattie and nathaniel, and suhyun just enjoys being there lol

jaeyong (23)

leader, eldest, main rapper, born in 1995

he’s got experience in the industry and leads the rest of the group with that knowledge. he debuted briefly at the previous company but disbanded early. he left the company with jack and now they’re in the new one.

main driver!! he drives all the members everywhere and its an ongoing joke that hes a chauffeur. however he’s got... a little bit of road rage lmao

GYM RAT! he’s jacked!!! he rarely shows his abs though, preferring to tease fans lmao however wooyoung keeps taking pics of him when he’s shirtless in the gym (both on purpose and on accident)

he’s also a bit cliche. if jack was long suffering mom(TM) then he’s the slightly detached but well meaning father(TM) ! not afraid to call out his members, but listens with an open mind. he’s a great mediator if there’s any issues within the group

though jaeyong is the leader, jack tends to be the one herding all the kids and making sure they eat. jaeyong is more about pep talks and being strong, giving great speeches, etc. 

even though he seems like he’d be rough around the edges, he’s incredibly loving. in multiple ways. he teases, he rough houses, LOVES hugging the members until they cant breathe. he’s... also very susceptible to aegyo. like he cant help but be swayed. he will never admit it but haeyoung and suhyun’s aeygo make his heart race

[unproduciblesmackdown]

throwing out some random numbers: 2, 23, 27, 39, 53, 58, 64, 76, 89

that’s the spirit tyvm.....you don’t know what these numbers will give me, idk what i’ll get from them, we’re just gonna see where it goes together

2. chocolate bars or lollipops?

this time i’ll cape for lollipops. they can be fun colors! you can hold the stick in your mouth as something to fidget with.....Fruit Flavor....

23. strange habits?

hmm i mean [autistic behavior] which would seem ~strange~ but only from that certain perspective.......i think One Weird Trick i do is from this nightmare time when like, one semester in college i guess uhhh that was wow a decade ago lmao i had 8 am classes every day for 2 semesters and my roommate and i were night owls so i’d (generally) go to bed earlier and i got in the habit of like, covering my head (or the top half anyways) with like a robe or towel or whatever to block out the light. makeshift sleep mask basically. except i’ve slept like that ever since and it feels weird to Not do so. and i doubt an Actual sleep mask would cut it cuz it’s partially the weight thing. i can only imagine how fun a weighted blanket is lol

27. favorite activity to do in cold weather?

going tf inside!!!!!!! cold weather is garbage. although once i did go ice skating and reasonably enjoyed it. i like skating

39. lemon cake or lemon meringue pie?

i don’t like pie very much lmao i think the Crust is generally disappointing and i’m not big on the fillings. that said, lemon meringue is a Superior Pie and i’ve made it probably at least a dozen times, it’s pretty fun i think. but still the answer is lemon cake. lemon cake is amazing. cake is amazing. no contest between like, do i want some Amazing fancy pie? or do i want this $1.50 cake mix? i would probably want the cake. or i’d at least have to take a moment to think about it even if going with the pie cuz yeah some pie Is good and u can’t quite get the same flavors in a cake, like rhubarb. i don’t know that rhubarb cake exists. but lemon cake is great. lemon Pound cake hell fucking yes Please

53. what is the current state of your hands?

my hands are fine. they’re here and the same as ever. my nails are already a little too long but not to the point i Gotta cut them cuz it’s annoying tf out of me.....they’re not very dry, which is good, cuz yknow sometimes in the winter it’s like oh no i need lotion to live or smthing.....one time it was winter and i had dryass hands and we went to this Concert and i was just clapping enthusiastically and it made the back of one hand bleed lmao like yikes. the back of my right hand has a freckle although maybe that’s a mole, i haven’t been paying enough attention to know for sure lol.....i used to have a freckle in the middle of my palm on my left hand but that faded a while back. speaking of my palms the other day i was like, hmm is there some weird subtle like crepeiness in the surface of my Palm Skin??? it seemed like there was weird like, lattice-forming creasiness going along the Length of my fingers / across my palm. it might’ve been a vitamin d thing so i ate 3 eggs. today my hands seem more normal but the whole thing might’ve just been me making it up + placebo yolks. but either way. very normal hand day i’m having rn

58. four talents you’re proud of having?

man idk lol. i can get shy cats to like me sometimes. you just Be Chill with them and let them get used to you, idk it’s not hard @ anyone who thinks befriending cats is difficult like, probably that’s just you doing it way wrong........i can cook decently well, that’s handy i think and it can be fun even though it’s also this whole involved hassle......i like to Draw Emotively (in that the drawings are emotionally evocative / expressive, not that the way that i draw is particularly emotive) and i like when people like it / read it as Expressively as intended, i guess i’m proud? like, mission accomplished.......oh wait yeah and damn when i practiced ballet for like a whole decade i was proud of being good at that i guess cuz yknow, Effort, same as with drawing lol i’ve been doing it for a hot minute, i can be proud of those results.

64. favorite website from your childhood?

i wasn’t very Online as a kid b/c we had the one computer w/ a dialup connection & just like, whenever i was using the computer lots it was Pc Games......didn’t rly be on the Net much until Late ‘08.......

76. what’s your favorite potato food (i.e. tater tots, baked potatoes, fries, chips, etc.)?

i’ve said latkes but you know who really supports me recently is a Whole potato i just scrub off and microwave and cut up and throw some salt n peppy and Shedd’s Spread uponst. like thank you so much for these nutrients and easy preparation, Staple Food

89. who would you put before everyone else?

hmph i don’t like, like, this Pyramid Tiering of everyone in your life with these higher and lower Levels of mattering-to-youness. i mean yeah sure i think we agree that it’s generally the case that we have More casual acquaintances vs friends vs Close friends and so on, but like. why are we gonna accept this Concept where like “okay but What If you need to only pick One Person.” like we’re driverless cars who need to program ourselves about whose life we prioritize, are we gonna run over This pedestrian or That one, who’s Winningest in the “being important to us” game. like we’re not a parent and the house is on fire and which of our three children do we love the most? well like, whose bedroom is closest. which of them hasn’t already bailed out a window. what if our Favorite isn’t the one we’d help first cuz maybe someone needs our help more at some particular time. like what does this question even mean!!!! what is the purpose of asking it??? i don’t like the premise or accept it. and it smacks of [those Concepts surrounding ~romance~ which i also do not like or vibe with]. no b.a.e........i’d go all out for Friends or for People I’ve Never Met But Respect or for Strangers.......some ppl would not get my all-out effort lmao or will get my nah-i-won’t-lift-a-finger lol but that’s if they’re like reeeal shitty. but like why should we whittle down ppl’s Importance to us to like “okay but who’s the 1 the ONE person who you care MOST about” like goddamn why are we adopting this framework. like ideally we have a Community of ppl in our lives who have different relationships / roles / connections to us, and this is pretty complex and why even Think about like, well there *has* to be the One who you prioritize Most Every Time, and you need to Know who that is......like what does that mean. and you know like. maybe the people who are in your life most intimately aren’t always the ones who have the strongest Help/Support ties to you here......like relationships are complicated and varied and having a network of people is better than like the idea that we should be fine and thriving with [The ~Soulmate~] [the friends who are kinda important but pale in comparison to The Soulmate] [family?] [acquaintances] like well if you Would Die For This Person and They’d Die For You you guys are obviously set!! 

anyways i went off about it but i get mad about this stuff like. the stuff that feels like it’s even within 2 degrees of talking about those Soulmates and romantique notions like being incomplete or inherently unfulfilled without That One Special Someone. and even throwing the Romance out the window, why like, have your network of relationships put into a Tournament Bracket where you whittle down who matters most until the Champion emerges????? goddamn