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mrs-kodzuken · 3 months ago

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hard to desire ⨟ kenma k.

chapter three

wutiwant saraunh0ly

❝More awake inside of my dreams, was that really you next to me?

Gimme what I want, who am I supposed to please?

Who am I supposed to please?❞

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You couldn't help but to get absolutely fucking frustrated with Kenma. After so long, the little petty act from him had gotten so deep under your skin. You weren't one to tolerate something so stupid and childish, especially when you were nothing but courteous.

Kenma had somehow caused you to stop refraining from your usual nice manner and instead seemed to have brought a hateful part of you out.

It had all started when you had changed your seat in a class, seemingly nothing right? Wrong.

Apparently, the universe hates you because as you roamed the seating options, choosing once further in the back before class started, you had dangerously realized that Kenma had this class too.

The burning hatred on his face was more than known when you also apparently took his exact same seat. He stood there with his books in hand, now a bored expression on his face as if he was waiting for you to automatically get up.

"There's no assigned seats, find another one." You side eyed him, a cold tone encasing your words. A scrunch of his face was duly noted when he walked across the room, avoiding a seat near you as much as possible.

Somehow, that filled you with excitement, giving the exact same energy back to him as he had been doing to you.

That's what his mean ass gets, you smirked to yourself. However, you couldn't help the hot and cold shiver of excitement that coursed through you. Suddenly, it was extremely hot in the light brown sweater you had picked out today.

Kenma on the other hand, knew that you had this class with him on the first day. From that day forward, he watched you like a hawk. Every movement, every sip from your pink water bottle, every single interaction you'd have with a classmate.

He'd be in the back watching you, unable to take his eyes off the way you were just... you.

He couldn't help but to act like this towards you. You messed his life up from the beginning, knowing who you were even before you guys had properly met. The crosswalk incident never seemed to have crossed your mind when you saw him. It had been in his mind ever since he saw how absolutely beautiful you looked, listening to a song he knew which made you even more attractive in his eyes.

Anyways, deep down you knew that this eventually would not solve anything between you two. You actually had to talk with Kuroo about this now, before it really got too far. That's not something you really wanted to do though.

Class had blown by in a breeze, you couldn't stop staring at the back of Kenma's head as he wrote down notes, doodled a bit in his notebook, and even stretched to avoid cramping.

You were so enthralled with him; you could sense it. You shoved that down to only wanting to be friends and not wanting to fight with your roommate.

"Kuroo, I just feel like Kenma doesn't really like me." You confessed, sitting on the couch at home, wrapped in a blanket.

"Nonsense, Kenma can be ... something, but I'm sure he just hasn't warmed up to you yet." He spoke so surely that maybe you just have imagined the past few interactions with Kenma.

Except... you haven't. Kenma truly was being a dickhead to you, you knew that much.

Kenma on the other hand, knew he was too. He couldn't stand that you actually live with them. Your presence –your scent– was everywhere even if you weren't there at all.

He couldn't bare it anymore. The lustrous thoughts of you filled his mind and he loathed it. He loathed you. But he couldn't help himself when you and Kuroo were out of the apartment, and he took a peek into your room.

He found it girlish and utterly weird to say the least, however, that didn't stop from taking an article of clothing from your dirty hamper. Kenma felt so dirty, so invasive, but he was getting unbelievably hard at the fact you might have worn these the night before.

Your pink and white dotted panties with a pretty bow on them taken by Kenma as a trophy. The dirty act of doing it sent an electrical shock down his spine, he hated you so much, to the point where he craved you so badly.

His hard cock had strained against his underwear and sweatpants he had so often worn. Seeing a dried wet stain on them was the straw that broke the camel's back for him. Kenma's eyes were lidded with lust, knowing that he didn't have nearly enough time to fully please himself with this article of clothing till you or Kuroo came back to the apartment.

You didn't have a clue of any of this, of course, only focused on telling Kuroo to talk to Kenma for you – not wanting him to hate you anymore.

And you definitely left out the bits where you've cussed back at Kenma or sarcastically responded back just because he decided to be an extra asshole like. A recurring memory strikes especially during the Saturday nights where you had made dinner for everyone on the weekends, but he insisted that he was sure it would kill him if he ate it.

"If you say so," You responded, picking at your nails, not having anything else to say or better to do.

"How about you come with me? I was going to go meet up with some friends from high school and I'm pretty sure you'd like to meet them." Kuroo says with a smile, if you hadn't known any better you would think that he was trying to cheer you up from the nonsense that Kenma was on.

"I guess." you sighed, deciding that you'd use this opportunity to make some friends outside of class and get your mind off of Kenma's antics towards you.

It was a brisk walk that you and Kuroo took, catching up on his classes and how he was doing lately since it felt like you both haven't really talked a lot lately.

He was going on about how he has been staying after lectures to help some of his classmates with work they were troubled on. In Kuroo's head, it just seemed like the perfect excuse to help you, and Kenma got along better when he wasn't around. Clearly, so far it has been backfiring.

No matter how many times Kuroo tried to talk some sense into Kenma, obviously knowing how you feel when he acts like such a dickhead to you, he just wouldn't budge. He'd claim that you're the one who is always provoking him.

"Oh, so that's why you've been wearing those so much? I thought you finally realized how well they suit your face but no, you got a compliment from a girl." You rolled your eyes, giggling at how silly Kuroo was sometimes.

"She was cute, okay?" He tried defending himself, knocking on the white apartment door you guys arrived at, blushing ever so slightly at this girl he had class with and occasionally helped her with her work.

Luckily his escape from this conversation was when a man opened the door. He was tall, broad shoulders, and had a funny spiky updo of white-gray hair that had black streaks in it – it didn't look half bad.

However, the most peculiar feature about him wasn't his build, or his hair, not even his clothes, it was eyes. Those eyes... were strange to say the least. Round, stark golden-colored eyes watched you like a hawk – no, like an owl. It was almost eerie how similar you could compare the two together.

He looked attractive and magnetic to be around, you understood why Kuroo was friends with him after all.

"Hey, hey, hey! Kubro!" The man interrupted your thoughts, embracing Kuroo into a man hug.

"Sup bro! How have you and Akaashi been?" Kuroo asked as they broke from the 'bro hug' and the man opened the door wider so you both could enter.

"We're great! Who's this little thing here?" He peered down at you, a wide smile on his face which suited him a lot.

"Hi, I'm Kuroo's roommate. Y/n." You returned a smile back at him, his joyous grin becoming infectious.

"Ah, I remember now. I'm Bokuto, this is my apartment that I share with my boyfriend!" He announced to you, which you nodded to, not really sure what to respond with.

"Kaashi! Come meet Y/n," The man loudly called for, who you were guessing, his lover.

A man emerged from around the corner of the living room, you assumed that's what it was. He was wearing a sweater that suited him nicely matched with a pair of black slacks. He had glasses on, which flattered his angled face very well. If Bokuto was handsome and magnetic then Akaashi was pretty and elegant.

"Kou, you don't have to shout. I can hear. Hello, I'm Keiji Akaashi," He extended his hand to shake yours – something Bokuto hadn't done.

"Hi, nice to meet you." You shook it, being polite and offering a smile.

"Would you like some tea?" You answered yes to the offering, turning away from what Tetsu and Bokuto were talking about and followed Akaashi into the kitchen. It was very homey here, and even smelled great. He put a kettle on and let you choose which kind of tea bag you'd prefer.

You let out a gasp, seeing your favorite tea in the mix, which was cinnamon apple spice. "This one please, I love it so much!" You couldn't help but to gush.

That caught Akaashi's attention, and he immediately turned toward you, a newfound friend he could speak to about tea.

"Tell me about it, I love the after spice it gives." He smiled; it was alluring. It made your mind wander to Kenma and how he'd look when he smiled, not his usual grimace that covered his face when you were around.

After a few mindless minutes of comparing favorite teas and even going so far to discuss different brands the topic switched to something else – or someone else. And that twisted your stomach in knots, however, you weren't too sure if it was a good or bad thing.

"So, you're rooming with Kuroo and Kenma? How has that been?" He sat across from you at the glass table, both holding and sipping the teas.

"Well..." You trailed a bit, slightly chewing the membrane off the inside of your cheek. You didn't really know how to phrase how it was going.

Eventually, you went with your gut and began, "Honestly, living with Kuroo has been a breeze. I've known him since I was in primary school so there are no bumps in the road with him." Not even bringing up Kenma until he just had to ask.

"And Kenma?" He questioned, finding it weird that you had only mentioned Kuroo and not the other roommate you were also living with.

“Uh, it’s been fine, I guess.” You were going to leave it there but you just couldn’t help yourself.

“Honestly, he’s been really fucking mean. Ever since the day I moved in, it feels like he’s hated my presence and I don’t even know what I did to him.”

“He’s just so infuriating sometimes and can't even bear a simple ‘thank you’ when I try to include him in things or get him his favorite coffee.” You grumbled, letting out more and more of a rant to Akaashi who was just sitting there, looking at you so intently while you spoke. It was as if he was silently urging you to continue.

“Don’t even get me started on the sassy ass remarks he loves to give me on the off chance he’s not trying so hard to avoid me. I’ve tried everything to be his friend and he’s just not budging and I don’t know what to do.” You sighed, finally out with all of the mess that’s been troubling you for the past weeks.

You knew it had to be quite some time that you’ve held all that in since it was the end of September.

“Hm, would you like advice?” He peered down at his now half empty cup, the tea delicious.

You peered up to him, surprised.

“You’d give me advice on how to deal with him?” You asked, curiously.

“Well, yeah. I’ve known Kenma since high school so I ought to at least give you some advice on his antics.” Akaashi explained as if it was desperately obvious.

To you, though, it wasn’t. However, you still nodded him along to tell you what you should do.

“It’s simple, just keep being nice when you can. Kenma can get under peoples skin sometimes but I guess we all have known him so long that it doesn’t really affect us anymore.” He spoke with intent, getting up to put his cup in the sink.

Keep being nice? It sounded like a load of garbage to be completely honest, but Akaashi had known Kenma for a while, along with Bokuto and Kuroo. So, you guess you had no other choice but to follow it.

Soon, the hang out was over and you exchanged numbers with Bokuto and Akaashi. You enjoyed that you had a nice advocate for you if you needed it – meaning Akaashi, or Keiji as he asked for you to call him.

You felt better about your hardy relationship with Kenma and planned to fix it too. Plus, it was nice to rant about your troubles to someone who listens very well.

They make a great couple; you thought as you and Kuroo walked on the way back to the apartment. The evening chill, flickering lights of streetlamps, and tugging your sweater close to your skin was so dulcetly ephemeral to you.

Your eyes started to lid, yearning for your bed as you couldn't keep up with the conversation of Kuroo telling you about how he and Bokuto met.

"You know, I'm really grateful for you," You suddenly felt sentimental when that left your mouth. Memories of Kuroo and you since you were young fleeted through the front of your mind.

Kuroo turned towards you with a curious look, "I'm exceptionally grateful for you, Y/n."

There wasn't any more talking till you both arrived at the apartment. You wondered in another universe if you and Kuroo had ever been actual siblings instead of found family siblings.

synopsis: it's the summer before you go to university, and you decide to become roommates with your pen pal that you've known since you were in primary. big problem arises, he's got a roommate, and it just so happens that his roommate either has a sexual want for you or hates your guts – or probably both?

tag list: [let me know if you’d like to be in the tag list!]

@geektastic84 @lavanderdreamve @hhoneyhan @kirikeijii @marsoverthestars @nymphsdomain @justagirlnamedkai @kodzukein @74zix47 @kakuzone @jaeminaur @3lectraheart

a/n: i hope you enjoyed, and the idea for this entire multi-chapter fic came from @deftrow !! i made the banner

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yearningandstillnotlearning · 4 months ago

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A r t .

- B.E.

Blurb :p | no use of any names for the characters, just “she” and “you”

a/n: first fanfic posted ever im so nervous | this was my yearning from some months ago i decided to make it into something more | please comment on your opinion on this im nervy

Not fluffy nor sexual but a secret third thing (sensual)

︶⊹︶︶୨୧︶︶⊹︶｡ﾟ•┈୨♡୧┈• ｡ﾟ︶⊹︶︶୨୧︶︶⊹︶

Have you got colour in your cheeks?

Leftover snack packets and crumbs of cookies and sugar littering the couch of the living room, clock read 12:38AM, its past midnight, yet for two girls with a sleep schedule as theirs, the night is still young, too young.

Family and friends long gone, others went home others went on dates, and another stayed behind to cherish this very moment.

Are there some aces up your sleeve?

Have you no idea that you’re in deep?

Laughs had hit the walls hours ago when they were once gathered up to 7, and even now at 2 laughs are still bouncing back and forth. Sneaky giggles and stupid jokes, unexplainable videos that just seem so funny when its late and for once youre not alone.

Energy drinks on the floor next to the bed and an annoyingly bright light hitting at the side to make up for the lack of sun, yet thats the last thing to bother you right now. Theres nothing that could actually bother you right now, not when you finally have her in front of you.

Ive dreamt about you nearly every night this week

Sketchbook in your lap, pencil in your hand and coloured pencils scattered along your side on the bed, criss crossed bodies mirroring each other face to face.

Even if your face wasn’t able to stay in one place. Even if your face couldn’t handle the urge to heat and melt your makeup off in the process, even if you couldn’t handle looking at her, as much as you couldn’t handle her looking at you.

How many secrets can you keep?

Your heart thumping in your chest the same way it does when you’re at a club next to the speaker, body shook with the beat of the speakers and the bass, and you couldn’t tell if its from the amount of energy drinks you’ve consumed this evening or her presence.

But this is better, oh this is way better, theres no eardrum-breaking noise, or people squished up together, stomach-stirring drinks, uncomfortable heels. None of that.

This is simply adrenaline in itself, it was the excitement pumping in your veins.

Cause theres this tune i found that makes me think of you somehow and i play it on repeat..

Emotions thumping at your heart and in your veins causing your blood to rush to your face, cheeks burning red, but the colour showed at your ears, palms so sweaty you hold your sketchbook carefully to not wet and bend the paper. Neck and collarbone stained with red rash spots, just how into her are you?

Shes not stupid now, you tell that to yourself to sleep better at night. She has noticed everything, a simple blood rush is nothing. The way you look at her when everyone is talking laughing and you’re quiet? When your choice of “recharging” your social battery is looking at and through her? When you’re alone and suddenly your voice drops to just above a whisper, sweeter than any sugarcoated candy? When you doodle her and her only out of so many people, there are 5 other people with you two, yet who do you draw the most? You spend all your effort and time on her, enjoyably so.

Until i fall asleep,

A hand picking up your own has a wave of goosebumps sent across your body, a wave of heat while doing so. An amused laugh breaks your gaze, from the mixed hands, up to her own stare.

Shes staring at you, and you’re wishing she would stare nowhere near you. The fear in your brain banging like a migraine, wordlessly telling you she sees it all, and the very same fear in your body, giving her all the confirmation she needs. Her eyes softening as her one-sided laughter dies down, and you’ve yet to actually see her. So far you have been too caught up in your own thoughts to see in front of you until now.

A hand holding your burning one to her also heated cheek, and a twinkle in her eye right between that blown out pupil and icy blue cloud that dances like the stars do on the dark night sky right outside the window.

“I knew you felt it too, Im not crazy to like you”

spillin’ drinks on my settee.

#my writing #FIRST TIME IM SCARED #⚢#Xandra’s work⭑.ᐟ #billie eilish #forgot to mention #loser reader #lol #blurb #oneshot maybe #billie eilish x reader #billie eilish fanfiction #billie eilish blurb #wlw post #wlw yearning #fanfiction #billie eilish x fem!reader

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juustozzi · 23 days ago

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Whats your biggest tip for beginner artists?

the most important thing, all the way, of which I stand 100% behind: just keep drawing. draw anywhere you want, draw a lot. draw a shitton, even!

true, anatomy books and real-life drawing lessons and shading guides do help. but if you use all your energy and time trying to start by making a Perfect Piece, you'll get frustrated too fast. don't be afraid of making "bad" art, because even if you think it's bad at the time, it's practice. your hands get more confident with the motions only if you keep doing it.

you got a favorite character? a theme you enjoy? some other small thing that you think is fun to draw? draw that! and keep drawing that over and over until you feel like drawing something else! hyperfixations are the goldmine of developing your art, since what's a better way to Understand a thing if not repeating it a thousand and one times?

at some point it will be a good thing to look into anatomy and stuff, but if you're right in the beginning of your art journey, I'd say just have fun and create!

(I went off tangent on saving all of your art from your journey and some other brainvomit but my pc freaked out and I lost the ramble.. maybe that's for the best)

oof this turned into a text of wall, so here's a quick redraw of an old sketch I found while digging my old files. one way to counter drawings that don't work out: doodle stupid things on them and move on lol

#own art #tmblrs doing something with searching words instead of just tags so I guess /ing words doesn't work anymore #I'll tag series later then for own archiving

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jumalanpelko · 12 days ago

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Fanart

Previous Suncat is not having a good day

OMGGG HOW THE CHEST EXPLODES???

AND THE POSE IS SO GOOD THERE IS SO MUCH PAIN AND MOVEMENT IN IT!

THANK U!!!

(also this is kinda close to a panel i have doodled for future comic)

Not stupid at all!

Like Ive said I dont know 100% how She works (i like keeping it vague) but I think She uses the energy to grow. I dont think She was this strong when She first arrived. She eats the souls, She gets stronger, She gets to eat more souls.

Also yeah, She is "the beast" Sugarpaws' mom talks about in "When the forest goes quiet".

I am inspired by like. Creepy stories of people getting lost in the woods and forest getting weirdly quiet is a thing that creeps me out a lot lmao

Also no-one has asked this, but yes, if a human happened to run in Her they would also naturally be like

Something is off here

OMG YESSSSS THATS THEM

At some point yes! Not a lot, it wont be like the focus, but we will see her!

Omg yes I am ok with that! People did actually make past guards and suncats at some point (before i put the comic on tumblr). If anyone makes Jumalanpelko oc SHOW ME

Hey who knows. Maybe a miracle will happen

Oh dont worry! Sun meter might be going fast but we have still about half of the story left.

Yeah the little dude is not afraid to fight god

This is one of the things that wont have clear answer! Maybe it has something to do with Her. Maybe something else made humans leave. Or maybe it is just the most basic Finnish problem: people moving to cities.

And the colony were farm cats!

It seems i can only add 10 pics on phone (and computer is not having any of it) so you will get part 2 in a minute!

#jumalanpelko #jumalanpelko fanart #jumalanpelkolore #jumalanpelkoasks #guard #suncat #the god

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spryzzi-writes · 25 days ago

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quick bakudeku drabble I did as a practice for a fic I'm going to be writing, figured I'd share! I've never written either of these characters before, so if anyone has any advice for making them more in-character, feel free to share, I'd appreciate it <3 this is also my first time writing a character with any sort of chronic issue, so comments about that are welcome also

“Hey, nerd, food’s done!”

Katsuki pulls two bowls down from the cupboard, dumping a healthy helping of tofu katsu curry into both. He sets both of them on the counter, waiting for Izuku to bounce down the hallway with all of his usual energy, waiting to hear his voice rambling on about whatever he’d been reading from his nerd book. His knee bounces, fingers drumming along his arm, waiting, waiting.

The clock ticks another minute. Then another. Katsuki huffs, leaving the food to march to their bedroom. Izuku’s probably too engrossed in his studying, maybe doodling the diagrams into his personal notebook, maybe reading far past the required pages. Because he’s a nerd like that. Katsuki’s chest tightens the more he thinks about it, and he scowls to himself, pushing into the doorway of their bedroom.

Izuku isn’t curled over his books like he’d assumed. He’s leaning against the side of the bed, arms braced against it, forehead pressed to his arms. His face is hidden, but his body is tight, tense, muscles twitching through his arms and legs.

Ah. Katsuki knows what’s happening.

“Deku.”

Izuku flinches, head jerking up. “Kacchan,” he sighs, relaxing into the floor. “I—sorry, I can’t—I’m trying to—”

“Shut up,” Katsuki says, moving to crouch next to him and wrapping his arms under Izuku’s shoulders. “I told you to tell me when it’s bad, dumbass.”

They stand up together, most of Izuku’s weight on Katsuki, but once he’s upright he finds his feet, pushing Katsuki’s hands away. “I know, I know, but you shouldn’t have to help me, I can do it myself, it’s just—”

He takes a couple steps and stumbles, Katsuki’s hands waiting expectantly to steady him. “You can’t do it yourself,” Katsuki growls, looping Izuku’s arm around his neck and wrapping his own around his waist. “That’s what I’m here for, nerd.”

“But I—” “If you say one more stupid thing I’m going to eat all of the curry.”

“Your food’s so good though,” Izuku whines, finally settling his weight onto Katsuki and allowing him to lead them to the kitchen.

“I fucking know, that’s why you’re going to stop being a dumbass and ask when you need help.” He makes sure Izuku is settled on his stool before sitting next to him, shovelling a bite of the curry into his mouth. Beside him, Izuku inhales like he’s going to say something, and Katsuki glares. Izuku deflates, taking his own bite of the food instead.

They eat in silence, Katsuki finishing first and standing back up. “Where’s your cane? And don’t fucking say you don’t need it.”

“By the couch, somewhere.” Izuku’s voice is worn, lacking his normal cheer. Katsuki’s heart clenches, but he says nothing, instead finding Izuku’s cane and bringing it back to him. He lets Izuku get himself off of the stool, walk himself back to the bedroom, has to prevent himself from hovering. That only makes Izuku feel worse, he knows. He rinses their bowls out and leaves them in the sink for later, trailing after his boyfriend.

Izuku is standing, looking at the books and papers scattered on the floor. Katsuki scoffs, scooping them up and dumping them on the bed. “You can keep studying, nerd. I have’ta do it too.”

He finds his own materials and climbs onto the bed, settling with his back against the headboard. Izuku hasn’t moved, is red-faced and watery-eyed, and Katsuki clenches his jaw, waiting for Izuku to make his own choice.

Eventually, he drags himself onto the bed, sitting next to Katsuki, His muscles are still twitching. Katsuki doesn’t even think when he reaches out and starts to rub his hand along Izuku’s bicep, kneading at the skin with his fingers. Izuku sighs, crumbling into his side.

“Does it hurt?” “A little.”

Katsuki keeps the ministrations going, pulling his textbook towards himself and opening it with his other hand. Something wet presses into his shoulder, and Katsuki turns to see Izuku with tears slipping down his cheeks. Crybaby, he thinks, a blossom of warmth opening in his chest. “What are you crying about, nerd?”

“You’re—you’re so nice to me,” he blubbers, squeezing his eyes shut. “You help me to—to walk and stand and you—you help with the pain without me even asking and you’re just so nice.”

Katsuki taps at Izuku’s chin until he looks up. “I’ve told you, Deku, it’s not a problem,” he mumbles, the words feeling awkward in his mouth, but he speaks them anyway. “You’re my boyfriend, so I help you. Because I want to, or whatever.”

“You really don’t care? Even though you need to be with me so often and sometimes you stay home instead of going out because I’m having a bad day and even—”

“Yes, dumbass. I’ve told you how many times?”

“A lot,” Izuku mutters, hiding his face back into Katsuki’s shoulder.

“Right, so believe it. I’m not a fucking liar.”

“I know. You’re really nice, Kacchan.”

Katsuki can feel his face heating up. “Shut up, no I’m not.”

“You are,” Izuku giggles. It’s a nice sound.

“Just read more of your nerd books,” Katsuki says, dumping one into Izuku’s lap.

He smiles, still teary, yet it’s genuine, brighter. “Okay, Kacchan.”

#spryzzi writes #fanfiction #fanfic #bnha #mha #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #bakudeku #dekubaku #midoriya izuku #izuku midoriya #bakugo katsuki #katsuki bakugo

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herbertpocketsfidgettoys · 7 months ago

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Think I only have enough energy to make stupid doodles now

#South Park #pip pirrup #How to fill up empty space when o don’t wanna draw somthing else ugh

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justmossyall · 2 years ago

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depression hacks masterpost

these are things that will help with mental illness that aren't 'go outside, drink water, and everything will be fine!!!1!!!11!1!11!' those are good fs but they don't work on their own. these will actually help in one way or another :)

hell yeah let's go

open your windows. the fresh air and sunlight will do you good and it takes like 5 seconds.

go buy some plants, there are like a gazillion that are next to impossible to kill. and don't come at me with 'ohhh I'll probably find a way hahaha" NO. the plants will be so helpful! they produce oxygen, bring nature indoors which psychologically improves your mental state, and they're just nice to look at! you can name them! sculpt and/or paint little pots for them!

STOP LISTENING TO SAD MUSIC. I cannot stress this enough. it just makes things worse. please stop. make a playlist of all your favorite stupid, happy, pump-up songs and listen to them all the time until they get annoying. then repeat!

acquire a gazillion stuffed animals. so much serotonin for such a small price

get a water bottle and put fun stickers on it, and designate that water bottle to be only for water. nothing else goes in it. that way you can drink out of it for kind of a long time before needing to wash it. keep it filled with water and actually drink out of it. drink as much water as you can, all the time.

chew gum! idk why but it works bro. especially watermelon.

hug people and ask people to hug you. hugs are so amazing it's like pure happiness but with the added perk of Deep Pressure. it can be from your friends, family, s/o, whoever.

make sure there's a lot of light in your room. not good to wallow in darkness. put up fairy lights, get fun lamps, light candles, keep your blinds open, etc.

dress like how you want to feel. be colorful, fun, and comfortable. don't wear hoodies, sweatpants and ratty old shoes, I know it's appealing but it's just going to keep you in that depressed state. I like to wear dresses, colorful jeans, graphic tees from 5-Below, combat boots, and lots of funky earrings. (seriously 5-Below is a lifesaver for literally anything!!!) you can get a lot of these things for super cheap - I got a 20 pack of fun earrings like duckies, mushrooms, mini water bottles, etc. for like $11, and a lot of my colorful jeans are like 6 bucks at the thrift store. whatever your style is or whatever you want it to be, work to make that happen. because getting dressed is one of the simplest things you'll do in a day, so why not make the most of it?

doodle. it's fun and simple, and it'll give your hands something to do other than pick at your skin if you do that kind of stuff (see below).

on a similar note, make art!!!!! it doesn't have to be good!!!!!! just make art all the time, as often as you can. write crappy fanfiction. make friendship bracelets. sculpt a funky lil cat. draw your comfort characters. art is so healing and it will do wonders for you. even just like run your hands through a giant bag of beads like I do :P

get fidgets and bring them everywhere with you. this is more of an anxiety/stimming thing for me but I pick at my fingers, lips, pimples, eyebrows, etc., and it hurts a lot and will probably leave scars. fidgets are just amazing. I'm partial to tangles and infinity cubes :) gum and chewelry are good for this as well (for when I bite my fingers/clothes or chew the skin off my lips)

if you find yourself with a whole day with nothing to do and you don't have the energy to get up and do anything, go to the park. bring a blanket, some snacks, and headphones, and just lay there and listen to music. sleep. watch youtube. literally anything you would normally do when you don't have energy, except it's outside in the sun and grass and nature around other people who are doing the same thing! 10/10

get a pet if you can. even just fish, but really a fluffy, snuggly animal is probably best such as a dog or cat. OH MY GOD THEY HELP SO MUCH. ANIMALS ARE MAGIC. I don't think I've ever been sad while holding or petting my grandma's dog. (our family doesn't have one right now lol)

spray perfume/body spray on you. faster and easier than deodorant and it usually smells better

if you're gonna scroll, scroll pinterest. honestly, it's probably best to get rid of things like tiktok and snapchat, but that's kinda unrealistic for most people so I get it <3 pinterest is probably gonna be better than other social media cause it's more creative?? if you know what I mean?? and usually it's reading things and not mindlessly watching videos

if you don't have the energy to do stuff with your hair, put it up in a bun! fast simple and easy. takes like 5 seconds, even for someone with super thick curly hair like me. (or cut it short! but most of us aren't brave enough to do that lol)

eat fruit. sweet and comforting, but healthy!! so much better for you than junk food, and honestly it tastes better most of the time too. I recommend strawberries, raspberries, blackberries, watermelon, and cantaloupe. easy to take with you on the go and sooooo good <333

play calming video games such as animal crossing, minecraft, stardew valley, cats with soup (if you're into mobile games), etc. puzzle games are good too! if you want something more combat-y, I would recommend the zelda games or forager. still chill and mellow but has more combat and story/lore

garden if you can. I know this kind of ties in with having plants in your room, but if you're able and you have the energy, keep a flower and/or vegetable garden. there's something so beautiful in putting your hands in the warm dirt, smelling your freshly-planted flowers, eating sun-infused vegetables that taste infinitely better than store-bought. it's so nice, but I know it's not for everyone so don't worry about it if you don't get around to it <3

sleep in the bus/car on the way to school if you're tired. not a perfect solution but better than falling asleep in class

inhale through your nose, not your mouth. it's better for your lungs and you'll get better air quality that way. it also helps calm you better than mouth breathing, and you can't exactly smell the fresh air through your mouth :P

read. sit down and read a book. carry one with you wherever you go. spend a weekend day in the library with a huge stack of books just reading. it's so calming and helps stimulate your brain. doesn't matter what you read as long as it's making you happy :)

surround yourself with color, not dark drab colors. hang up art and posters on your walls, get bright blankets and pillows, lay out a tiny lil carpet, make bead curtains and string them up on your curtain rod, set out little figurines/sculptures around your room. put color and life everywhere around you, and that will start to seep into your soul.

tea is always good. or if you don't like tea, hot water with lemon juice and honey. basically the same :)

if you ever just don't want to do something, like you just absolutely don't want to get up and do _ thing, think about future you. would they be like "bro thanks so much you really helped me out there" if you did the thing? if yes, then do it, no matter how impossible it seems. you'll thank yourself later.

a statement that is near and dear to my heart: if you feel like everyone hates you, sleep. if you feel like you hate everyone, eat. if you feel like you hate yourself, shower.

NO MORE SU!C!DE JOKES. ever. the end! replace "i'm literally gonna kms" jokes or anything along those lines with "i'm literally gonna flop to the floor" or "i'm literally gonna go ham bananas on this place" or whatever wild bullshit pops into your brain.

watch studio ghibli movies. the most amazing things to ever exist. I have never felt sad while watching a ghibli movie. they are basically the definition of peace.

take a bubble bath!!!!! :D

making your bed helps for some reason??? why, I have no idea. but it does bro

get excited about things. smile when you hear your favorite song. hug your amazon package when it comes in. count down the days until a holiday. laugh with joy when you have an amazing day. it makes things so much better.

an important addition: bring snacks everywhere

that's all for now, lmk if you have anything else to add!!! love you guys, I promise it gets better <3

#depression hacks #i love you #so many people love you

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loregoddess · 10 months ago

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okay one of my all-time favorite fanarts for the first Octopath game were these doodles of the travelers sleeping, and it made me want to make art of the Octo2 travelers sleeping but I don't have a lot of energy for art lately so I don't think that'll happen, however I was still inspired to come up with a whole bunch of headcanons about the sleeping habits of the Octo2 travelers, sooo...I wrote them instead. Cheers. (some story spoilers)

Ochette Ochette has official art showing her sleeping, so we know she sleeps curled in a tight little ball (although she probably repositions herself in her sleep), but I also think she nests. Like, all the time. Staying at an inn? Ochette turns those blankets into a nest and curls up in them. Camping? no need for a sleeping bag (unless it's cold) she'll just tamp down some grass and make a nest. Will also nest in trees by rearranging the branches and leaves. Nests in Osvald's hair on occasion.

Also I think Ochette's a huge cuddler. She's usually cuddled with Akala or Mahina, but once she gets to know the other travelers better and figures out their personal boundaries, she'll cuddle anyone who's okay with it (probably usually Agnea and Castti. Throne wants to cuddle Ochette so badly but refuses to ask...Ochette eventually figures it out though. Osvald swears he doesn't know anything about Ochette making nests of his hair or snuggling into his coat during cold nights, but everyone knows he has the soul of a loving father. One time Ochette fell asleep leaning against Hikari and he was afraid to move at all for the rest of the night).

Follows something of a crepuscular sleeping schedule, so Ochette's most active at dawn and dusk, naps in the middle of the day, and sleeps through most of the night (although she's skilled at night hunting and can stay up most of the night if need be). Ochette can technically stay awake for a couple of days at a time if she's taking breaks and short rests, since it's useful for tracking and stalking prey over longer distances, but doesn't prefer this type of a hunt. Can also technically follow a "typical diurnal human" sleeping schedule, but Ochette thinks it's stupid. Would love siestas if they existed in Solistia.

Overall quick to fall asleep, quick to wake up. Only feels groggy if it's cold or the weather's bad, as she'd prefer to continue sleeping snuggled up in her warm nest.

Castti Castti can sleep anywhere, anytime, in any position, but mostly because she does not have any sort of healthy sleeping habits or regular sleeping schedule. Terrible, terrible habit of just staying awake to help patients and then passing out as soon as she gets a brief break in her work (her sleeping at a table in her ending card artwork attests to this). She was better about getting proper sleep when she was with Eir's Apothecaries and could share the work, and the other travelers are good at nagging her to get to sleep, but Castti doesn't really hold her own sleep health to the same standards she'll expect of her patients (she is, canonically, a bit reckless about her own health, re: Osvald telling to her to take better care of herself in that one travel banter). Snores if she's gone too long without sleeping, and won't stop until she's gotten at least two hours of sleep.

Not a really deep sleeper, but not a light sleeper either. Castti has the ability to sort of sense when someone around her needs medical help, and wakes up accordingly to help them. If no one's in trouble though she could sleep through a hailstorm on a tin roof. Because she doesn't follow any fixed sleeping schedule, her body's innate sleeping cycles are a bit wonky, but if Castti allowed herself to return to a "normal" sleeping schedule she'd be the sort of person who was up before the sun rose, and be in bed as soon as the sun set.

Throne Throne is the lightest sleeper in the group. A mouse scampering across the inn floor could wake her. Always sleeps on her side with a dagger in hand. If she's at an inn, she chooses whichever bed is against a wall or in a corner with no windows, so that nothing can sneak up behind her as she sleeps, and sleeps facing out towards the rest of the room. If she's camping then she either chooses a location where she can't easily be ambushed (under an overhanging boulder/cliff, against a large tree), or begrudgingly sleeps on her back so she can survey the area around her. Once she's more comfortable with the other travelers, she's willing to treat them as "walls" that she can safely have her back to, but overall being raised by a syndicate of assassins made her an extremely cautious sleeper.

Given the nature of her work, Throne's mostly nocturnal, opting to sleep through the day, and be awake all night long. However, some jobs required more flexibility, so Throne also learned to just sort of be up whenever she needed to be up, and sleep whenever she could. If left to her own devices though she prefers to sleep through the day. Very quick to wake up, but also doesn't have too much trouble getting to sleep either.

Osvald Before prison Osvald was probably the sort of person to stay up late into the night as he pursued his research, and sleep in late during the morning. A very deep sleeper as well, although he did acquire the parental "oh shit, my kid needs me time to be fully awake" instinct when Elena was a baby that never really went away as she got older (Castti recruited Osvald to help her nurse the others when they get sick because he started having the parental "oh shit" reaction to the other travelers as well). If he needed to be up early for some sort of scholarly conference or to teach classes or something, then Rita was the one to get him up in a timely manner (she was more of a morning person), which was good because Osvald would take 1-2 hours just to fully wake up (very serious coffee person).

Osvald's time in prison changed him however, and between the cold and needing to survey everyone and everything in the prison, he stopped sleeping through the night and would sleep in short bursts instead. Like Throne, he became a very cautious sleeper, making sure his back was to a wall while he remained hyper-vigilant of his surroundings. Whatever his sleep schedule might have been didn't matter since he had to abide by the prison's work schedules. Being passed out as he washed up on the shores of Cape Cold was the first long "sleep" Osvald had in five years.

After escaping, he's sort of in a weird in-between state where part of his mind still thinks he's in constant danger and wants to continue being stressed and vigilant, and another part that realizes he's safe now and wants to finally get some rest. As a result Osvald's sleeping habits are...haphazard during his travels. Sometimes he manages to sleep just fine, sometimes he's restless, sometimes he'll be up for two days straight claiming he can't sleep. One time Castti offered him some sleeping medicine and he slept for almost an entire day. He doesn't stop being vigilant, although he's not quite as cautious as Throne (no weapons on hand), but this mostly just results in him knowing everyone else's sleeping habits and troubles. Partway through the travels, Osvald does ease up a bit as he's able to accept he's not in constant danger, and as he comes to trust the others more he begins to relax enough to start recovering his old sleeping habits.

Eventually, he is able to recover most of his sleeping habits, staying up late researching, and sleeping in late (unfortunately Clarissa and Elena have the same sleep schedule, so if they all need to be somewhere early chances are they're going to be collectively late). Osvald never does quite shake some of the habits picked up from prison though, and doesn't sleep as deeply as he once did.

Partitio Partitio doesn't sleep in any really odd positions, although he does rotisserie chicken through the night, turning from one side to his back to his other side to his stomach and back to his side, all without really waking up. Snores like a motor if he's on his back, but if one of the other travelers kicks him or tosses something at him, he'll turn over and stop snoring (won't remember this in the morning). Sleeps extremely deeply as well, and can sleep through almost anything. Coughing wakes Partitio up immediately though, because of the time he spent nursing his father's poor health--this in turn makes him a great nurse if any of the other travelers fall sick, and Castti was pretty quick to recruit him to being her aide as well.

Growing up working in mines meant Partitio was pretty tired come night, and would just pass out. He's a natural morning person, and typically follows a very regular "wake up with the rising sun, go to sleep with the starlight" schedule. Only oversleeps if he partied too hard late into the night, or else had to stay up all night for some reason.

Agnea Tosses and turns the most through the night. Not out of discomfort, Agnea just, doesn't really stay still when she sleeps, and sleeps in the strangest positions as well when she isn't moving around. At an inn the bed's covers will be an absolute mess when she gets up, and her sleeping bag ends up cocooned around her in ways the other travelers didn't think possible. Worst bedhead as well, it takes her a good half hour to get her hair brushed out sometimes. Which is fine because it usually takes her a bit to fully wake up in the morning (although if she's excited about something, Agnea can get up and be ready to go in ten minutes flat).

Also a bit of a sleep-talker, but the sort of "nonsense" sleep talk that almost seems to make sense but doesn't. The other travelers have held entire nonsense conversations with Agnea as she sleeps. She of course, does not have any memory of these conversations when she wakes up, nor do any of her dreams match the content of the conversations recounted to her. Agnea was a bit embarrassed by this at first, until she realized the others weren't teasing her to be mean, but because her nightly chatter was truly amusing in an endearing sort of way.

Prefers to sleep late into the morning/early afternoon and stay up into the night, since it fits her schedule as a dancer better. However, Angea also has one of those internal alarm clocks, so if she needs to get up early in the morning, she just tells herself at what time to wake up and then she does. Absolute envy of Pala, who does not have an internal alarm clock. Very useful when she's travelling though, since she can make sure all the other travelers are up on time if she needs too. Also, given the size of Solistia I'm assuming there's like, major time zone differences, but I feel like Agnea would be one of those people who almost never suffers from jetlag (partly bc the means to travel across the time zones quickly enough doesn't yet exist, but also because she just has a naturally good internal sense of time and adjusts to the times the sun rises and sets pretty quickly).

Temenos Temenos looks like he sleeps peacefully. On his back, hands folded over his chest, perfectly still, no matter if he's in a bed at an inn, or a sleeping bag while camping. The truth is it takes him 1-3 hours to actually fall asleep, and he's just pretending to sleep while he tries to get thoughts about whatever case (or general stress thoughts) out of his mind. Ochette, Throne, and Osvald have figured this out, since Temenos's breathing isn't actually steady until he's fallen asleep (Ochette has good ears, Throne's used to keeping a close eye on those around here, and Osvald also got good at monitoring his cellmates and the prison guards, which carried over to his traveling companions). Once he is asleep though, Temenos sleeps fairly deeply.

He's also had these issues getting to sleep since forever. When Temenos was really young, Jorg would read him stories from the scriptures, and once Temenos learned to read he'd stay up late reading and rereading these stories in hopes that the tedious language would bore him to sleep. This is at least part of the reason why he's memorized almost all the stories in the scriptures, even if he can't remember the details exactly. Sometimes if he knows he's not going to get to sleep easily, he'll still read, although he's expanded his reading list to just about every genre, and usually always has some sort of book on hand as a result.

Because he remains in the same position all night, Temenos wakes up stiff and needs to stretch to loosen his muscles. However, when he has nightmares he tends to toss and turn a bit, and then just wakes up achy from having slept in an odd position. Night owl by nature, feels most awake in the evening and early night, and would sleep half the day except his duties as inquisitor and cleric require Temenos to get up early (which he uses an alarm clock for, maybe? I mean, mechanical clocks do exist in Solistia, so...). Wakes up fairly quickly, but is always a little tired throughout the day.

Hikari Hikari tends to sleep mostly on his side, and also keeps a weapon nearby (he did grow up participating in a concerning number of wars and battles). He prefers to get up early and go to bed early, but given the need for flexibility on a battlefield, can and has stayed up through the night and slept part of the day with little consequence. Hikari's also an incredibly quiet and still sleeper, rarely repositioning except to sometimes roll onto his back.

He is also a deceptively peaceful-looking sleeper. Hikari's issue is less that he can't get to sleep easily, and more that he's afraid of the Shadow overtaking him somehow while he sleeps, a fear that was especially prevalent when he was in active warzones. Without anyone he could really discuss this with, Hikari had to figure out how to get to sleep on his own, and eventually settled for meditating before he planned to sleep. During his meditation he focuses on suppressing the Shadow the same way he's able to suppress it when he's awake, and specifically visualizes locking the Shadow away for the duration of his sleep. This meditation tactic, once Hikari refined it, did help him sleep with lessened fear of the Shadow overtaking him. It didn't stop him from occasionally having nightmares about the Shadow though, which eventually led to Hikari figuring out how to lucid dream so he could get the Shadow out of his dreams as well.

All this means that, so long as Hikari has adequate time to set up, he's able to meditate and then simply lay down and go to sleep. Unfortunately, it also means that he will refuse to sleep if he does not have adequate time to properly mediate, and has on occasion just...stayed awake for a concerning amount of time. Hikari's so earnest and polite about insisting he simply can't sleep though that the other travelers have a hard time arguing with him in these rare instances where he refuses to sleep. When, on occasion, he ends up knocked out from a battle (or getting zapped off a bridge), and doesn't have control over passing out, Hikari actually does fine, since his subconscious kicks in to keep him safe from the Shadow, but this doesn't stop him from practicing his disciplined sleep ritual.

Hikari doesn't ever truly stop his meditation before sleeping after the events of his story, but he stops forcing himself to stay awake out of fear if he can't meditate, much to the relief of his friends and retainers. It's less that Hikari no longer fears the Shadow, and more that he believes in his own strength to keep it out of his mind entirely. At that point, Hikari actually sleeps just as peacefully as he looks while sleeping.

#octopath traveler #octopath traveler 2 #octopath ii #octopath ii spoilers #actually if I'm being honest I think I like these headcanons better in writing than I would've in my artstyle #I had a lot of fun writing them although I'm sure there's all sorts of weird typos #like all my silly stuff don't take this too seriously it's just me having fun and making it everyone else's problem #I dunno why I have a ton of headcanons for Octopath characters specifically but I'm not complaining #oracle of lore

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mrs-luigi-vargas · 9 months ago

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Hello! A few days ago I read @stripetkattelalala54-gf's headcanon about Mario in Bowser's lap and then some dialogue popped into my head. So here's my attempt to give context to that dialogue! I think I ended up straying away from the original headcanon in the end but this was still fun to write! ^o^

~~~ [AO3 Link] ~~~

“He was hardly sleeping the last I saw him, you know.”

Peach’s words stayed Bowser’s hand. “Is that supposed to mean something to me?” he asked, eyebrow raised.

Peach didn't answer, only waving her arm in a ‘go on, then’ motion. Bowser narrowed his eyes at the sarcasm in the gesture. Still, he didn't move to jostle Mario’s shoulder just yet. Even though he didn't see a reason why he shouldn't wake Mario up; he’d been a pain in Bowser’s neck ever since he’d spotted him a few days ago. At the market in the town nearest his castle, no less, the Princess still safe at home. With a damn backpack on his shoulders.

Bowser had watched him closely from afar, sure he was going to cause trouble, but all he’d been doing was looking at wares and buying trinkets and being disgustingly nice to the vendors he’d talked to. He hadn’t even been haggling; how he hadn't been snubbed for that rudeness was beyond him.

Regardless, Bowser had meant to walk away and let Mario burn under the late summer sun, but the tank top Mario had been wearing and the freckles on his shoulders it had exposed had stalled him long enough for Mario to notice him. Which was a mistake, because from the second Mario had seen Bowser he’d stuck to him like gum on his sole and it had been distracting. Distracting for his troops, when Mario’d swept himself up in their training exercises — which Bowser had meant to watch for insight into Mario’s fighting moveset but ended up watching for the way his sweat-soaked muscles tensed before he threw a punch — distracting for his kitchen staff, when Mario’d decided to visit their workspace — managing to wrangle a recipe for Hot Drumsticks out of them that he then made and had the idea to deliver to him in his office personally, which considering how poorly the dish came out should have been terrible, but it somehow wasn't — distracting even when Bowser tried to bore him with paperwork to get him to leave — parking himself on the couch and doodling who-knew what on a spare page, humming a tune that should have been annoying and looking up whenever Bowser moved something to the ‘done’ pile and shooting him that damn cheery grin that lit up his whole face —

“I hate having feelings.”

“You didn't seem to mind the ones you’d had for me.”

Bowser glared at Peach. Peach smiled placidly. Bowser glared harder, because the entire reason he’d sent his lieutenants to kidnap her in the first place was because after that first day of Mario making a nuisance of himself, it had become glaringly obvious that he was running himself into the ground for some stupid reason or another. And with Greenie apparently out of town, somebody had to knock some sense into the idiot, and it wasn't like Mario had listened to him so far.

But instead of doing that, Peach had sat herself in his chair behind his desk and watched Mario fiddle with literally everything in the room until he finally ran out of energy, at which point he'd draped himself over Bower’s lap and passed out. Half an hour ago.

Bowser lowered his hand onto Mario’s shoulder. Mario sighed in his sleep, expression relaxing. Bowser scowled against the blood rushing to his cheeks. “I hate it,” he repeated.

“You’ll deal.”

“I wouldn't have to if you’d just take him home.”

Peach shrugged. “Give him a break; he’s lonely.”

“What, and you weren't good enough company?”

“Not when I’m in so many meetings.”

Bowser scoffed. “As if I don't have work to do, either.”

“You foist it all onto your advisors, though!”

“So? That’s what they’re there for! I have better things to do than reading.”

Peach rolled her eyes. In doing so, she caught sight of Bowser’s ‘done’ pile by his desk. “I don't suppose all those papers magically signed themselves, then,” she teased.

“I —! It was him!” Bowser sputtered, pointing at Mario. Peach stifled laughter.

Mario stirred, the volume of Bowser’s outburst interrupting his nap. Bowser clacked his jaw shut. “Don't you dare,” he hissed.

For once, Mario listened to him and didn't dare, sinking back into sleep. The relieved slump of Bowser’s shoulders was minute, but Peach giggled at it anyway. Bowser ignored her, because she sucked and he hated her, actually, until that giggling moved and Bowser looked up from staring at Mario’s face to find her partway out the door.

Peach waved at him. “I’ll bring back snacks,” she stage-whispered with a grin, and then disappeared. With the weight of Mario on Bowser’s legs preventing him from stopping her from wandering around his castle unsupervised.

“I should wake you up,” Bowser muttered to Mario, who only snored in response. Bowser sighed, and reached his other hand to carefully move him, because the way Mario’s neck was bent was shooting phantom aches into his own. Not because he actually cared about the state of Mario’s neck, or anything. But regardless of the true reason, almost as soon as Bowser settled Mario into a better position Mario stretched and rolled over to smush his face into Bowser’s stomach. Bowser’s scowl did nothing to stem the blush forming on his cheeks, this time, despite how hard he tried. Feelings. Hated them.

Bowser sighed, leaning back against the couch. No, he thought, with the weight of Mario curled around his waist, who was he kidding? He couldn't say he hated this. And wasn't that the problem he’d been trying to ignore for a while now?

Mario shifted, a sleepy smile growing at something playing out beneath his eyelids. Bowser wondered what he was dreaming about. Something stupid, probably, like a mountain of pasta. Or maybe someone. Like his brother. Or Peach. Or —

...or.

Bowser frowned, shaking his head to dispel that train of thought before it could travel any further, a train of thought that’d had Bowser’s hand finding its way back to Mario’s shoulder without him even realizing. He huffed. What a ridiculous mess, this was. Maybe he did hate his feelings, after all.

Well, whatever. He’ll deal.

#fics that make me create headcanons for when the mushroom and bowser's kingdom's hypothetical fiscal years end #(mid winter and late fall btw. maybe.)#mlv.fic #smb #bowsario

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