#i never would have thought i'd have a partner who treats me the way he does

[caterkinnie]

Hi Caterkinnie! Your work is really amazing, thank you so much for all your work in the fandom! I think anyone who sees your headcanons days are brightened! May I request Rook, Jamil, Ruggie and Azul or Vil (up to you) with a friend they have been deeply in love with for a long time, who's just broken up from a long-term bad relationship. I'd find it really interesting to see the angst the boys struggled with while their friend was in such a bad relationship--a relationship that would somehow never end no matter how awful or neglectful their partner was (up to your imagination how their partner was)--and how they handled not letting their deepening love/crush show (if that's how they'd handle it. I honestly have no idea as to how Rook especially would handle this situation). And of course, now that there's been an unprecedented breakup, what now? I hope that wasn't too specific. I just thought it'd be interesting because I just broke up from a long-term relationship @__@ (5 years for me... In my case, I was dating a selfish man child. According to my friends, it was heartbreaking to watch because no matter what they said/did or what he said/did it would never end, so they just had to watch the rollercoaster play out while white knuckled). I haven't seen headcanons on this type of situation yet and how the boys would respond, so I'd love to see your headcanons. Not to mention, your writing is so top knotch, and I feel like you really get the complexity of so many of these characters, that I was pumped to ask when I saw your requests are open. If it's too specific or you're not feeling it, I get it! I hope you keep rocking on with this blog and whatever else you're up to! Thank you for the hardwork!

Supporting you through a bad break up...

❥ ⌗ characters: Rook hunt, Jamil Viper, Ruggie Bucchi, Azul Ashengrotto.

❥ ⌗ Summary: After a long long time with the person who you thought was the love of your life, ended the relationship suddenly with the pretext he was no longer in love. You decided to confide your feelings with your closest friend; a friend who happened to be deeply in love with you.

❥ ⌗ tags: tw for toxic relationship, though details aren't given, there are mentions of arguments and toxic behaviour. didn't proofread enough. sorry if ooc.

❥ ⌗ a/n: sorry anon!!!!!!! I've had this drafted since you requested this... and only now i finished it!!! i couldn't bring myself to delete it as I loved the idea so much. Hope if you see this that you're doing so much better now!!!!

Rook made it very clear from the beginning he had feelings for you, but would not attempt to show them.

He also could see the signs of what seemed to be an unhappy relationship that sooner or later was going to come to an end; signs you probably didn't notice.

He's a very caring man, ever since the moment he met you he always tried to help you in any way, and this was no exception; but he also knew, as much as it hurt him, you needed time to realize that the person you loved didn't treat you in the way you deserved to be treated. It hurt him so deeply to see the way he talked to you, but Rook wasn't a hero who would yell at your boyfriend to stop. He had to be subtle — trying to calm the waters when he was around, defending you in his own way. His heart ached, sometimes with jealousy, sometimes with rage — sometimes both, but he refused to let you know about any of these emotions. He was there for you, whether you needed help or advice.

He helped you because he loved you, he constantly told you how important you were to him and there was nothing he wished more than to take you away and treat you like a queen. But alas, his love was not only unrequited, you were in love with someone else.

Oh, how glad he'd be if only one day you woke up and chose him! The selfish part of him wanted to rush, but he knew he had to be patient... Someday it'd happen, or at the very least... you'd be with someone else who makes you happy, and that's something he would like as well.

But when you come to him to tell him everything that happened...

He's going to comfort you and walk you through the feelings the breakup left… In those cases, he's not as mischievous as he typically is. His voice is soft and soothing, as he tries to get your mind off things, as well as being of support when you need it the most…

He can't bring himself to court you while doing so, although deep down, he wishes someday you'll see his efforts, even if he's not exactly expecting you to fall for him…

However, your now ex-boyfriend will avoid you like the plague, and runs away when Rook is nearby, and you wonder if he had something to do with that….

Jamil warned you about your partner a few times, he didn't want to get TOO involved to avoid making you upset, but every time the subject was brought up…. he felt a deep heaviness in his heart that he hated.

The least thing he wanted was for you to notice his feelings. But maybe he was too insistent on the idea that it was best if you broke up…

But those were genuinely good feelings. He saw how bad you were being treated and constantly found himself thinking… “I could do better, so much better…” Yet he hated himself for it. What could he do, if you never saw anything in him?

He feels all of these things, yet it's like… he only wants you to Not Be with your boyfriend. Jamil believes you'd never love him back as well.

If you came to him for advice, he'd give it to you— but his voice was always restrained… and soon enough, he just tried his best to act as if his feelings weren't there, as if he was just a friend who gave advice and was exhausted by you not following it.

But then… it finally happened, but as happy as he felt, seeing how much it affected you.. it didn't feel like victory (even if it was!)

He wouldn't constantly seek you out. But if you need to vent he's always there. He's not good with comforting words… but his honesty can be soothing and grounding. As well as he might sometimes just try to aid you in general, after all… acts of service (unfortunately) are second nature for him.

Whether it's for food… studying… anything. You don't even have to ask… But he's not expecting you to like him back. And not in a cute “he'll wait for you!” kind of way… he thinks you'd never reciprocate his feelings. And he's not sad about that! Jamil just accepted that as a reality. Whether that changes or not is up to you…

Ruggie's pretty straightforward… Not with his feelings, but with his opinion on your boyfriend.

He takes every chance he gets to say something about him and as much as he tries to play it off as a joke, his voice is bitter… He hates him so much!

Ruggie wants to believe he only hates him because you're someone he could dare to call a friend! He denies any other underlying reason for his distaste for your boyfriend that isn't that he's unfair with you... But obviously, he's a bit prideful, a tiiny bit. He couldn't help but try to impress you every time he could. He wished that you'd see how you deserved to be treated… And maaaaybe how much better he is. And he tries for so long, it's kind of obvious if you know him well. If you're observant enough you might have caught on to his feelings.

However, that all changed when you went to him looking for the comfort of a friend, after your relationship ended…

Like Jamil, Ruggie wanted to feel happy, he wanted to celebrate! Finally you weren't tied to that man-child! You could finally focus on yourself and maaaybe on him….. But when he saw how heartbroken you looked, he couldn't bring himself to act on those emotions. You were hurt, and he hated seeing you like that. Though he's pretty awkward at it… He'll try his best to comfort you, but his words feel stiff and you can tell this is not his area of expertise…

He does so much better when it comes to acts of service. He'll try his best to distract you, make you laugh… which is something he'd love to hear again. He won't dare to mention his feelings however. It'd take a long time before he even considers that he could have a chance.

Unlike everyone before, Azul'd rather stay quiet.

He already hated the idea of having feelings for you, and just wanted to forget you existed to make the tightness in his heart disappear. He wasn't one to believe in love, let alone the fact that you were already committed to a relationship…

Yet because of that same reason he wasn't able to leave.

He had a special way of aiding you out of uncomfortable situations and stupid arguments, almost appearing randomly and requesting attention from one of you. The way he dissipated the tense air by just intruding (literally) was almost comical.

Azul's not sure of what to do, as he always regrets helping you, he says you're hopeless and it's up to you to change the situation… as if he doesn't care at all unless you're going to make a deal with him, but then he ALWAYS comes back, lends a listening ear, maybe greets you with some tea and a few snacks… Oh he pays for them, don't worry. It's a gift.

Then he goes back to feeling guilty for helping you, and frustrated for liking you.

….He's a complex guy.

One of those times, you came to talk to him at his office (which the twins knew you had special priority over his other tasks. Even if he never asked.) and told him what happened, you had an argument and it escalated, leading to the breakup… In which he seemed calm as always listening to you… asking you to sit on the couch as he paid attention to your woes.

He was at a loss for words.

Yes, he did believe this was for the best… but this ACTUALLY happening made him realize he never planned what to do beforehand. He repeated the typical routine, something sweet to drink… something soothing to eat… He's a good listener, and he will easily ignore his crush on you to help you better.

His feelings were always second place for him, and Azul seems like the kind of guy who low-key wishes you don't love him back, as he wouldn't know what to do if you did... (even as flattered as he'd feel, he still struggles with trusting people.)

However… if you're too uncomfortable with tour ex… He might ask the twins to aid you if you wish to not see him again! For free of course. You shoule accept his kindness… as he typically doesn't offer such services for free.

Reblogs are appreciated!!!

[sophielovesbooks]

Sometimes it hits me all over again that my husband is the best husband anybody could ask for and that he's amazing and I love him more than anything, and I tell him all of that. And he's super appreciative but a bit confused and goes "I'm not even doing anything!"

But, like, he does everything, you know? 🥹

[dontbesoweirdkira]

howdyyy, what do u think of plat yan! dick grayson (or platonic yan father bruce wayne up to u) with a batsis who is very disinterested with him primarily bc when she was younger she idolised him a lot but now not so much. there are comics where grayson has cheated on his partners before so imagine batsis coming to realise as she aged and matured that her doting brother is a bit of a playboy…. a lot like a playboy actually—

You know, this is actually extremely realistic. There's nothing like the rose color glasses falling off and realizing just how messed up your family truly is.

I'd like to think that there was plenty of jokes and mentions about Dick being a playboy but Batsis would just be absolutely clueless. You probably just thought it was a reference to his charming appearance or the way he gets hit on at least once whenever he goes out. Not really that he was an notorious heart breaker.

Like i don't think the other batkids had serious talks about it in front of you because of your (then) age or maybe it was a request by Dick so he could keep on his perfect mask with you?

Ironically, he wouldn't want any man to treat his little sister (or any of them) the way he does to other women but he has a problem. I will say though, it makes absolute sense that Dick or even the others would have issues keeping relationships or even have sex addictions. I mean it's a real issue that many people are struggling with right now. But can you imagine your father constantly bringing home women and cheating your entire childhood? Like Bruce introduces some of these women to them, they get attached to this potential mother then it's ripped away to be discarded for the new catch. I think that definitely warped Dick's view of women and romance stems from that. *intense mommy issues* But also i mentioned before that it's hard for him to maintain relationships while taking on the fatherly role in the family. His obsession with making sure all of his siblings are cared for and protected(mixed with being nightwing), makes it all the more difficult. Maybe that leads him to just hooking up with and being sloppy in his relationships. Maybe its just a means of stress relief and that causes him to almost dehumanize/objectify the women he "romances".

I'm not saying this is justifiable, cheating is disgusting and his behaviors are something that needs to be corrected regardless of mommy issues but for headcanon sake we are entertaining the concept

I'm not sure how you'd exactly find out about it. Maybe one of the kids let it slip and didn't bother to do damage control because you're old enough now? Maybe you spoke to one of his exes that is still friendly with the batfam? Or maybe your brain started to develop and you realized he wasn't hanging out with that new super model as just friends all night...it was something more and his girlfriend definitely didn't know about it.

Regardless, I think when you finally found out about everything, your world crushed. I don't think you'd hate him but you just feel yucky about the whole thing. Now when you look at him something in your stomach just sinks. You might even wonder if you can trust him. I mean if he's got that much of a problem to be dishonest with his lovers, then why would it be so left field to suggest he lied to you too when he said he loves you or that you were his favorite? The transition from you idolizing him to being standoff-ish would be extremely noticeable to him. I mean it's hard to ignore when you were his mini me. Even as you got older you followed him around and never skipped an opportunity to be near.

He wouldn't think that it was because of the playboy thing, maybe just you needing some space as a teen. Everyone has gone through that phase before but when he notices your shift is only directed towards him, he's a little upset about it. He doesn't understand what he did wrong? One day you guys are eating ice cream together while having a sleepover in his room to you treating him like a disease.

Eventually your big brother corners you and makes you to confess whats bothering you. He apologizes if something he said rubbed you the wrong way but you couldn't keep treating him this way.

"uhm..i dunno, dick? I found out how you've been treating you partners and i think it's kinda gross. I guess i just don't really wanna be around someone who treats women like that right now..."

I think Dick's reaction would be complete shock....who tf told you?! He has no defense but he tries to muster up one before realizing this is just making him look worse when EVERYBODY knows how much of a whore he is lol. He'd back off of you and maybe even mutter an apology before walking away to go collect himself.

He's furious as well...whoever told you will be getting an earful because they just ruined something precious to him. (yeah they did. totally not his OWN actions) If it was one of his brothers, he will be throwing hands.

Dick does very much care about others perception of him, i've said this before. He knew he had a problem and his other siblings have spoken to him about it and it affected him but never enough to change. It's just a far deeper issue than wanting a quick fuck in the expense of his partners...But seeing his baby sister look at him with just so much disgust and disappointment was enough to cause him to spiral. He's not proud of his actions and knows he's hurt and discarded of many, many women for his own satisfaction. It's deplorable. I can imagine him taking maybe a few days to himself, he's just in his head while being overtaken by heavy guilt.

I'm not sure if Dick would actually change for you though? I think he is even debating it. Yeah he's a yandere for his batsis but is his obsession with you enough to kick the other one to the curb? That's up to you. A hopeful person would say, yes he would. Anything for his babybat! He's going to do whatever it takes to prove himself again, anything to make you proud. This habit isn't worth it if hes loosing you.

My opinion? No, he won't change after his guilt wears off. He'll just pretend like he's reborn. Dick would try for like a week and then go right back to doing his habits. He's a manipulative piece of work and yeah, lying to you is bad but he wants his cake and to eat it too. He's not willing to give up anything that gives him a euphoric boost. Shh...what you don't know, won't kill you.

[yuri-is-online]

One Sided Love Triangles: Tokyo Debunker

Link to Twisted Wonderland Post

Because I hate when people have to lose. Though I'd be way more comfortable writing a normal love triangle for tdb than twst... there's a few of these bitches who could stand to be knocked down a peg or two.

Haru vs Peekaboo- betrayal never comes from your enemies does it. Haru wants to be happy you get along with his baby, and he's really grateful for your continued help in the anomalous animal sanctuary, really. He even originally found your interactions with Peekabo really cute! He's got a bunch of videos saved on his phone and everything but he can't help but feel just a wee bit bitter. He really wants to be the one with his head in your lap getting scritches and being told how cute he is. Something he'd never say to your face but whines about at the bar enough for Romeo to record and send to you. "For free?" Yeah for free he's had enough of this shit please come get your man MC.

Kaito vs Luca- this one is cannon to a degree I think... Kaito is deeply insecure about how much more confident Luca is around MC compared to him and how the girls on campus seem to like him more. The fact that he's so painfully oblivious doesn't help, meanwhile Luca is just overjoyed that his two best friends are in such a good relationship. You're genuinely perfect for each other, why all these secrecy and making him promise not to tell the other about the nice things you say? Isn't it natural to gush about your partner???

Towa vs Ren- Towa is such a pouty baby who doesn't fully understand his feelings and Ren is just happy to have a friend who understands the concept of a log in bonus. Neither of you fully realize that Towa is attempting to flirt, or would it be closer to say woo? All you know is one minute the two of you are casually chilling and talking about horror movies or something and then *BAM* Towa's thrown some flowers at Ren and pulled you into his lap. He's happy you wiggle to get comfy with him but very upset that you keep up your conversation with Ren. Stop being a good senpai and pay attention to hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiim.

Tohma vs Leo- just hear me out. I don't think Tohma really gets jealous? He seems super secure in himself and his abilities so he doesn't have much of a reason to get whiny and silly over MC, that's your role in the relationship. And he knows, logically that this little video Leo uploaded is bait to test the security on campus but it doesn't stop him from damn near cracking his phone in half when he sees it. That's how Leo wants to play this little game? Well fine, Tohma hopes he's ready to be thoroughly humiliated. No one can flirt with another man's partner quite as well as a bitch with a monocle. Leo is totally unaware any of this for the most part, he just assumes the extra irritation he's picking up on from Tohma is because he keeps spying on him and Alan. The fact he keeps teasing MC doesn't even cross his mind, he's just doing that to irritate you.

... as a side note can you imagine how confused everyone would get if Leo and MC kept picking fights about their upcoming "divorce" when no one even thought they were ever technically together. Except for Ritsu who sits you down to seriously try to talk you in to let him being your divorce attorney and still doesn't fully get that it's a joke by the time you're done. Actually while I'm at it:

Leo vs Ritsu- where that's exactly your dynamic but Leo starts catching some genuine feelings when he tries to crack a joke about you cheating on him with your divorce attorney only to realize that makes him unironically angry. How dare you, after everything you've been through. Wasn't he he enough? You know he can't treat you like he can. And you're just like "what can't treat me wrong?" And then you have a very toxic make out session Sho has to hear both of you scream about later while he seriously considers taking up a drinking problem.

Taiga vs Haru- this game has one character named Haru (ginger, baby) and one named Haku (green, evil?) Which confuses me an unreasonable amount. I already mentioned I wanted a serious Taiga vs Haku love triangle... but Taiga vs Haru would just be silly. You have MC who loves anomalous animals and hanging out in Jabberwock and Taiga who hates emotional intimacy and his feelings for MC just as much as he hates the idea of you being with anyone else. And of all people why Harry? He thought they were friends... or cool at least even if he won't let him eat that chinchilla thing. And now he's got MC playing defense for it too, it's irritating. He already has to fight himself to remember who you are every time he sees you again and go through the annoyance of recognizing he's a bit in love and now he can't even break into the animal sanctuary without tripping over himself and paying attention to you instead. It's annoying and it's all Haru's fault for having everything he wants. (If you ask he'll say that complaint is about Peekaboo but Haru and Romeo know it's not.) Haru is just trying to get some help from a trusted friend he's so stressed out ;-;

Sho vs Jin- Sho and his excuses... he doesn't want to just invite you to hang out and he doesn't want to ask you to come help him with the food truck because you've got so much else to do. You deserve a chance to rest, and he wants to be who you come to do that with. But Jin... he'd make that so much easier if it was him wouldn't he? He's rich and connected, and you're so sweet he's sure you could thaw that frozen heart enough for him to see you as human and not a gopher. Sho knows you, the moment he started paying attention to you he saw you as a person. But he still hurt you... and Jin didn't really do that did he? Jin doesn't like Sho because he's in Vagastrom and he doesn't trust him with your safety. Sho might see a rival and a better option, but what he's really dealing with is MC's disapproving dad who can't stand that their boyfriend has a leather jacket and a motorbike. He bets he's got tattoos and an arrest record too doesn't he MC, Jin is judging you so hard.

[magicians-abode]

(This is my first time writing NSFW, and a over 2k words, so I'm excited to see if you guys like this)

"Hungry Love. Let us Feast"

[Laios Touden x gn!reader]

Warnings: NSFW content below - long fic? - mentions of reader having AFAB genitalia - mentions of cannibalism (nothing gory don't worry)

Laios liked monsters. And he liked eating them. He had an... odd fascination with them, but who were you to judge, when you liked the idea of cannibalism as an analogy for love? Exactly, you were in no position to judge your partner.

You hadn't told him that, though. That you liked the idea of "consuming each other", or that you wanted him to bite each other as you were in bed, treating each other like a fine dish.

—Is everything okay, love?— Laios placed a gentle hand over (y/n)'s shoulder, stirring them away from their thoughts.

They nodded, smiling up at him softly.— Yeah, just thinking— he sat by their side, crossing his legs. He had taken off his armor, wearing the clothes from underneath. They couldn't help their eyes traveling down towards the v-neck of their shirt, the strings loose for comfort.

—Thinking of what?— he asked curiously.

—Just...— should they tell him? No...— about us— they kept their soft smile as they talked for a while about different topics, relating one with another, love, food, monsters. Ugh, monsters. Don't eat them, eat me (y/n) thought to themselves, unable to hide the expression of slight annoyance on their face as the topic was brought up.

He noticed this and mid-rant stopped— Are you alright? Are you tired? We've been walking a lot today, maybe you should rest— if there was something he liked more than talking about monsters in this world, that would be you. He cared about (y/n) more than anyone could imagine or describe.

—Ah, yes... well— they hesitated, looking at their hands, then at his face, and then back at their hands as they fidgeted with their fingers in an attempt to calm their nerves.

They wanted to say how much they wanted to be... consumed, devoured. But would it be weird? Maybe for Laios not too much?

—I've. .. wanted to tell you something for a long time— they mumble— I– It's nothing bad... I think— they waved their hands as they tried to not scare him with their seriousness. Laios looked at (y/n), silently waiting for them to speak.— Have you ever heard of cannibalism as a metaphor or analogy for... love? Or sex even?— they closed their eyes as they said that, bracing for something bad that never came.

Laios put a finger to his chin in thought— Well if I'm being honest, I think I heard of it once or twice, when I was younger and studying literature, but I never delved in much deeper than the fact that it's a thing— he answered with their usual tone.— Why do you ask?— Laios looked at them for an explanation, curiosity clearly sparked in his honey eyes.

(y/n) gulped, trying to ignore how their cheeks started to burn with an incoming blush. Were they really gonna talk about this? They had already told Laios and piqued his curiosity, and he probably would try to pick up the subject sooner than later if they decided to just leave it at this. So gathering courage, they spoke.— I would like for us to– uh– how do I put it?— (y/n) searched for the right words to voice their ideas— to treat each other like a meal when we have intimacy— they blurted, trying to finish the sentence as soon as possible.

—Treat each other... like a meal...— he echoed, raising an eyebrow— so you mean you want me to eat you?— he concluded.

—Ah– well, yes and no, I mean it not in the literal sense, but in a figurative one obviously— they explained— you see, I'd love it if you spoke to me more...no– I...— they sighed again. Gods above was this difficult.— I want you to describe or treat me like a meal. I want us to enjoy ourselves as if we were... "feasting on each other"—.

Soon enough their explanations worked their way into Laios's brain, and he understood exactly what (y/n) was asking for. He smiled, already coming up in his brain with a few ideas. He'd have to think more about the subject though, after all, he always wanted the best for you.

That night, when everyone had gone to sleep in the rooms of the abandoned house they had chosen to pass the night in, Laios approached (y/n) from behind as they were getting into bed.

—Sleepy?— he whispered in their ear, their strong arms hugging them by the waist. They froze at the sudden interaction and slowly relaxed.

—Not really, but we need the rest, don't we?— they smiled, trying to turn around to hug them back, but Laios didn't budge in their hold. —Uh, dear?— they mumbled, this time trying to look behind them.

That's when they felt his lips softly spread kisses on their shoulders, going to the back of their neck and ending their path under their ear. His breath was warm as he spoke— I'm hungry...— he mumbled against their skin. His voice didn't sound like it usually did. This time it sounded... dominant almost.

(y/n)'s breath hitched at this, suddenly feeling themselves grow hot in the cold of the night.

—Should I see if Senshi has any leftovers?— they asked despite their nerves.

—What for? I've got a whole meal right in my hands already...— he let his hands wander, one going down to grip and squeeze at their thigh. The other one traced its way over their neck and up to touch their lower lip.— It would be a waste if I didn't eat you, don't you think? ...so much to delight myself with—.

He let go of them and guided (y/n) to lie down on the bed. They obliged, excitement and pleasure already cursing through their veins as Laios crawled and watched from on top of them how they looked at him with a shy expression, their hair all messy over the soft pillow, a few strands on their face.— Oh how beautiful you are...— Laios whispers, licking his lips and moving the strands of hair away from their pretty face. His lips softly collided with (y/n)'s, who returned the kiss as they tangled their fingers at the back of his honey haired head.

Licking at their bottom lip, silently asking for permission, (y/n) parts their lips, allowing their tongues to dance lovingly. One of his hands stays by the side of their head to keep himself up, while the other moves the spread their legs a bit further, allowing him to come closer, his chest now pressing against theirs.

A string of saliva connects their lips when they break the kiss, and they're both left already panting, thinking about what's next. Laios stutters for a moment as his fingertips touch slightly under (y/n)'s shirt— May I?— he looks up at them through lidded, yet soft eyes.— I'm dying to discover what my meal is for tonight— he let's his hand further under their shirt once (y/n) gives them the okay to go ahead.

His big and somewhat calloused hands cup one of their breasts, massaging it for a moment, his index finger reaching for their nipple and flicking lightly at it. —Mhh... you're so perfectly soft, my love— he uttered, peppering kisses all over their collarbone.

(y/n) sighed, a hand coming up to their lips to contain the moan that wanted to escape from their lips, caused by all the attention they were suddenly receiving.

—Don't...— Laios said firmly, looking up at them from their collarbone.— I want to feast your flesh, and I want to listen to the way you feel when I'm devouring you. So don't— his hand traveled slowly down from their chest to the hem of their pants, feeling the goosebumps on their skin.

Laios felt his erection twitch in the captivity of his own pants, but he bit his lip, focusing once again on the task at hand. Eating.

He slid their pants off easily, underwear gone along with them, taking the opportunity to get rid of his own shirt as well. His breath already agitated, he gulped down the sudden urge to just dive in between their legs and taste them without a word. He continued to gently massage one of their breasts and kissing their neck. Lips starting to trail downwards, he pinched softly at one of their nipples, kissing his way down towards the other breast and sticking his tongue out to play with the nipple of the other.

When their legs twitched, threatening to close in the slightest around him, he moved his hand to hold their thighs open with a strong grip. It wasn't enough to hurt, no. But it was strong enough to let them know, without a word, that it was not happening under his watch.— Can't have a feast without the main course, can we?— he chuckled, trailing kisses down their body and finally positioning his face in between their legs. (y/n) looked away, but quickly looked right back down at him, embarrassment and excitement mixing in their stomach.

He slid a finger over the slick of the entrance, watching mesmerized at their juices as he heard a soft gasp of surprise come from their lips.

Kissing both of their thighs for a few moments first, he looked up to them and whispered— Thank you for the meal, my love— and closing his eyes, his tongue stuck out to lick in an upward motion, testing the waters. Once he heard another gasp, accompanied of a soft whimper, he pressed his face right into their cunt, tongue lapping at the juices as his nose pressed against the soft bundle of nerves slightly above.— Gods, I've been starving— he mumbled against their clit, his warm breath making them shiver.

Sticking his tongue inside of them, then swirling it around their clit, their flavor stuck to Laios's tongue and lips, smearing itself around part of his cheeks and nose as he hummed eagerly against their pussy.

It went on for a while, a long while. And he seemed thrilled at their reactions. What if he licked like this? What if he bit their thighs? What if he raised their legs and pressed his face as much as he could into the sweet liquor of their pussy? What if he held your hips in place with enough strength to make you unable to stop yourself from being completely devoured by him?

He shifted his gaze up towards their face— Gods you sound divine. You're so perfect— lidded eyes looked at them, as one of his hands moved towards the entrance his tongue was just exploring.— Can I?— always so polite, he asks for permission to keep exploring more.

— You shouldn't play with your food— (y/n) says in a breathless whisper. Looking back down at him— but... I'll allow it— Laios smiled softly at their words.

His finger teased the clit first, procuring they were even more wet than before as he slowly pressed kisses all the way back up their abdomen and across their chest until they reached their lips.

Gently teasing the entrance and then pushing his middle finger in, he was met with the warmth and the tightness of their insides as they moaned into his mouth.

—Relax sweetheart...— he whispered near (y/n)'s ear, moving to press a kiss on the space between their ear and their jawline— We're going to be here a while. I like taking my time to enjoy a good banquet— his finger pumped in and out of their pussy beautifully, their slick only providing them with lewd sounds everytime he dipped his finger back in or out. Laios bit down onto their neck, procuring to leave a hickey that everyone was most probably going to be able to see in the morning, and (y/n)'s hips stuttered upwards against his fingers.— You sound so delicious sweetheart— he praised, moving a second finger up to their entrance and penetrating them with both now, eliciting a rather loud moan to escape from them.—Take your time, I'm not stopping until I get to taste your sweet release— Laios mumbled against their jaw.

Gods was that night going to be a beautifully long one.

[abbysimsfun]

Sims In Bloom: Generation 2 Pt. 118 (The Calm Before)

Life continued for Heather and Conrad after their eventful trip to the city. Conrad couldn't be the one to canvas his old apartment building in San Myshuno, but he made arrangements with his partner, Detective Spangler, before he, Heather, and Ash had even returned to Brindleton Bay.

He believed they would find Ximena there, but they had to be discreet, and his team worked with San Myshuno PD to watch the Arts Quarter and confirm their suspicions.

They felt life at home might soon return to normal, so Heather started to think about that wedding and kept up her workouts. Spring would come soon enough, and she'd be able to go for jogs with Gord once the weather warmed, too. Gord couldn't wait for that, either.

Conrad would be able to turn his focus to Rafa and George Brindleton without the threat of Ximena breathing down their necks. While officers worked behind the scenes, the Nesbitt-Gordon household buzzed with contentment.

With the family always happy to see him, River paid a visit to talk with Hazel about her break up. Heather wanted to help, but she had to admit to herself that she was disappointed in Hazel for cheating.

Only 'Old Man River' could find the right words to express disappointment without a hint of judgment, and when he walked into the bedroom, Heather got up to make herself scarce.

River glanced at his younger sister with concern. He could see she was beating herself up and wanted to hear her side of things.

"Why didn't you leave your wife before you called Suri again?"

"I think a part of me wanted to hurt Nicola for how she treated me," admitted Hazel. "I know how terrible that is, but she made me dread coming home some nights, and we kept talking about trying to make it work, but we never did. She was too high maintenance and trying to meet her needs was costing my sanity. I think, more than anything, I was just mad at her, but I feel sick about how much I hurt her. I left town, but she's stuck there trying not to hear everyone whispering about her."

"I wouldn't worry about Nic," River said. "I ran into her mother at the Crumpleclones' flower stall yesterday. She took a sabbatical from the school and Mike's class will have a substitute teacher until she's back. If she comes back. I guess she's going on a show called Dating Deanna that starts filming in Tartosa soon."

Hazel reeled. "Nicola?! On a dating show? Does she know they usually put contestants through their paces and people...people cheat?"

"Maybe she thought her usual ways weren't really working for her anymore."

Hazel considered this with a nod. It was suddenly all too clear why he'd come to see her. "I hope Nic finds someone who makes her happy."

"And is Suri a rebound? Or are you really interested in her?"

"I don't know. I really like her and we have more in common than Nic and I did." Hazel shrugged. "I hope it's real, but we're giving each other space right now, after everything fell apart so publicly."

"That might not be the worst idea, but don't punish yourself and miss out on something that might be really good. You made a mistake and you have to learn from it; it's really that simple, but you're not a horrible person." River offered his little sister a hug, and Hazel accepted it willingly. "Maybe one day you and Nic can get closure for the way everything broke down, but you're on different journeys now, and you both have a chance to find happiness and really discover who you are. That's what really matters."

"Thanks, big bro. I know I'd deserve it if you were all mad at me."

He shook his head with a warm smile. "No you wouldn't. You didn't do anything to us. Just Nic. Maybe Suri, if you dragged her into this for nothing."

He stayed for dinner before heading home, leaving Heather dancing to the aerobics channel on his way out.

Lavender loved to be outside, and if her mom focused too long on her exercising, she'd usually sneak outside with her coat on to play around in the snow. One evening, she found a snowman Ash had built and promptly destroyed it - much to Ash's chagrin.

"I worked hard on that snowman!" he cried, pulling a frightening face to try to scare his little sister. Lavender peeled back in surprise.

"I sowwy, Ashy."

Ash scowled, but he couldn't stay mad at her, and immediately pulled her in for an autonomous hug. "It's okay, Lava. Just try not to do it anymore."

"I'll twy."

The next day, Ash invited his friend Arron Kalani over after school, excited to show off his brilliant new invention. "It's a remote control that will melt the snow!"

He pressed a button. Arron glanced outside the sliding patio doors in the living room and frowned at the white powder that had coated the town since the start of winter. "I don't think it works."

"It's solar powered. When the sun returns in the spring it should power up easier."

Arron turned up his nose in confusion. "What's the point of it working in the spring when the snow will be melted already?"

Lavender sat on the couch and giggled happily. "Ashy took ice-chippy!" she tattled.

Arron chuckled as Ash laughed at his oversight. "It's still pretty cool," Arron insisted. "I bet your next model will work better."

Life was always good, but the Nesbitt-Gordons couldn't help but feel as though things had never been better. For once, they weren't afraid to be hopeful. Heather kept working hard at Buttercup Pet Clinic, and Conrad focused on some other cases at work.

He had just finished looking over Officer Adler's notes on the recent Mercury Gratz assault case when the text they'd all been waiting for came in from Detective Spangler.

"We got her, Lieutenant. She was booked at San Myshuno PD first thing this morning." ->

<- Previous Chapter | Gen 2 Start | Gen 2.1 Summary

Gen 1 Start | Gen 1 Summary

NOTE: Arron is the son of Zoe Patel and Mitchell Kalani, and he has younger twin siblings Isabelle and Xavier.

Thought I'd end the year on a high note with Ximena behind bars! The second batch of year-end favourite screenies comes tomorrow before the story continues on New Year's Day, but the last one could rival any of the last 25, in my opinion.

[twst-rose-prisms]

Twst boys preferences for their partners

First of all, sorry for taking so long my rosies 😭😭 schools have been getting to me and I'm trying to catch up with the twst stuff again such as reading the story to understand the characters better! My bestie @twst-megane has been helping me a lot with this once again so tysm 🙏🙏🙏

Characters: All NRC students (except Ortho) x Reader Genre: Fluff Reminder: This is just a headcanon post, so even if you aren't your loved one's preference, do not worry! Remember, love might have preference, but it's never the final thing that decides one's partner, so rest assured~ Your lovely twst boys love you no matter what 🌹❤️ Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 (coming soon)

🐙 Azul 🐙

- If you manage to date a charismatic, handsome guy like him then I'd say his s/o is the world's luckiest person ever~ He isn't a person who would easily give his heart to someone else considering what happened to him in the past, so it takes time for him to genuinely fall for someone, and you just so happen to be very special to gain his affection! - He would need a s/o who is emotionally intelligent enough, someone that be able to pick up his feelings even though the signs are so subtle, he might brush it off mostly to keep up the professionalism but I'm sure you're the only one that he can trust showing his real side to you with the way you genuinely care and love him despite not being super touchy or show it obviously. - Because of the past he had, his insecurities are also something that needs a warm helping hand. A s/o with a caring, loving tendency would do so he won't think lowly of himself whenever he's around them. Perhaps at one point, despite his initial charismatic, calm appearance, he would think that he doesn't deserve someone as amazing as you. How can you care so much for him like that even after knowing his past or all the terrible things he did? Yet you just wipe those thoughts away from his mind with a gentle, soft reassurance as your hands caress his, feeling each other's warmth... and you caught his ears turning red~ - He pays attention to his appearance a lot especially after he comes on land, since he can nicely dress himself up and also even change his scent with different kinds of colognes. So I think he would have preferences for appearance too for a partner, maybe a s/o that knows how to dress themselves nicely enough, no need for fancy make-up or flashy clothing, but would be a nice touch if they like to use perfume like him too. He is pretty keen with his senses, and maybe he took a liking to you due to your scent... but he wouldn't openly admit that it smells really nice (or he gonna end up blushing and getting teased by the tweels). - Bonus: Azul would be the type to fumble at first when he got into a relationship, so being patient and teaching him would get him to fall even more for his s/o. He might study and research beforehand, but nothing comes as close as a real experience after all, he would get really flustered during your first kiss or when you embrace him... like a shy octopus, so just take it slow and intimate with him💖

-----------------------------------

🐬Jade 🐬

- Being someone who loves to serve someone as his nature, it's no surprise when his s/o usually being the one receiving instead of giving. He wouldn't have a specific preference when it comes to finding a partner, but he would like it if his s/o let him serve them, it's something he likes to do and he wants you to enjoy it too. Being dependent on him, asking for his help with something when you can't do it by yourself, and he would immediately be there to lend a helping hand. Don't hold back or feel bad because like I said, it's something he likes doing after all. - Though I think he would like it if his s/o treated him equally too, like they're both on the same ground and not just a serving/receiving relationship only. He would find it fascinating that someone like you thought of him that way despite how he keeps offering his service to you, it's just... interesting to him, he probably gave you one of those smiles of his and brushed it off to you but little did you know... you have become the most intriguing person in his eyes and he would like to study you more. (Think of it as a good thing! Probably...) - If his s/o happens to show interest in him, he would be curious and start bringing up topics such as his hobby if they're curious about it, like for example: terrariums or mushrooms. Even better if his s/o actually shows genuine attention to them, he would feel delighted as you both talk about the said topic for hours until it's time to bid goodbye and get back. He felt like he seemingly just found a great partner, someone he is interested in as you're also interested in him... I'd say it's a special mutual feeling~ - He probably has researched a lot about the fashion on the land, hence why you see him dress up really well in a lot of times, so I think he would like it if his s/o knew how to dress nicely on the right occasion. Like Azul, he doesn't need you to wear fancy or flashy clothing, but just taking care of your look properly is enough, maybe some light perfume would catch his attention too as he would be able to tell that you were here or you're around this area easier with your scent (It's less work for him in a sense too) - Bonus: I think surprises would get him the most. Maybe something like knowledge about mushrooms or attempting to build a mini terrarium and show it to him, he would be delighted that you actually spent time on something like this just to impress him, and you sure did but that's not the only thing that will happen (his heart will be impressed too) 💖

-----------------------------------

🦈Floyd 🦈

- The most unpredictable out of all characters, he can have such constant mood swings that make it hard for others to keep up with him, so I think his s/o should be someone that at least be able to handle them and doesn't get impatient with it. The moment he gets bored with someone he'll move on quickly, as such, patience is something that you would need when you date Floyd. If you can't keep up with his eccentric, constantly changing personality or easily get irritated then it'll be hard to put the relationship together. - He is pretty open when it comes to dating or preference because he won't be the one the reciprocate easily, his s/o should be someone who at least show constant interest in him or know how to get loose and have fun occasionally of when the right time come, maybe even know to play pranks too. He would be surprised in a way that makes him all chuckling and laughing in an... interesting way, don't worry, it's just how he usually is so don't get too startled, it just means he's having fun and you'd probably prefer it whenever he does. Also, it means he's having fun because of you, which is a great thing since you're that intriguing to him! - Though, it doesn't have to be someone that know how to have fun all the time, it could be a s/o who is pretty attentive, they can read his body language or treat him with genuine emotions, especially to not treat him like he's stupid or a fool. He might act like that but he needs respect too! I think he would be pretty impressed if you're able to guess what is he thinking right now from his behaviors (considering only Jade would be able to do that) and would squeeze you like a happy eel guy he is. - Unlike Azul and Jade, I don't think he would have a preference for appearance too much since he's pretty open to anything. He also doesn't pay attention to his looks most of the time too since well... You see how he dresses up most of the time. But since he's pretty interested in shoes, maybe if you happen to have a bit of knowledge about them then it'll impress him since he's quite fixated on the said topic. I think he would be pretty keen with his nose too so he can tell what kinda scent you got like Jade, he probably doesn't have a favorite scent but as long as it's nothing too heavy or so then he'll be absolutely whipped~ - Bonus: Squeezing hours is the most effective way for someone like Floyd! He will give you a silly sea creature nickname as a way to show his affection but also hug- I mean, squeeze you often too whenever he caught a glimpse of you around the school. If you treat him well he'll really enjoy being around you, so I hope you're ready for the most random squeezing ever from the silly guy himself 💖

-----------------------------------

🕌Kalim🕌

- This big ball of sunshine definitely needs someone who knows how to take care of others or be attentive, knowing how clumsy he can be, he needs a s/o who loves to take care of him or pay a lot of attention just in case he accidentally injures himself again (might as well call you Jamil's sibling-), but when he sees how worried you look whenever you look out for him, he will try his best to be careful with himself too! The last thing he wanna see is your sad face after all so he'll remember your advice as best as he can! - He needs someone who has stability and balance to themselves so they won't feel tired out when they're with him, knowing how energetic he can be. Taking care of himself and making sure he's okay is one thing, but he also wants you to look out for your health too and not just all about him! You both would look out for each other (even though it's mostly your side), it's a relationship of caring and giving mutually and constantly~ - I feel like other than stability, he would like a s/o who knows how to have fun too when the time comes. Who wouldn't like some fun once in a while! He probably drags his s/o around to have fun with him, whether it be having a banquet or a ride with the magic carpet, he wants to see that pretty smile of yours every day, especially when you stay by his side, it just makes things more special to him you know? It's like he's the only one that can make you all bright and cheered up or show you a whole new world! - I think when he gets into a relationship, he can be a bit of a big puppy or touchy, I mean, who doesn't enjoy a warm, loving hug from your loved one? So he might need a s/o that doesn't mind too much skinship at the time or maybe even enjoys sudden hugs out of nowhere. Of course, he still knows how to respect boundaries at times or read the mood, but when he gets too happy he just couldn't help but embrace you! You bring him immense joy, so treasure those moments as much as you can, because there isn't anybody else that's like him after all. - Bonus: It's a bit hard to get him to like someone in a specific way, since in a sense anything could get him to like you, he is pretty easy to gain affection with how soft and kind he is compared to other characters, but if you're being forward and direct with your feelings then he'll surely return those feelings even stronger or brighter like the sunshine he is💖

-----------------------------------

🐍Jamil 🐍

- Being the vice leader of Scarabia with tons of work every day, I'm sure he can get very tired sometimes even though he doesn't show it on his face; that's why I think he needs a s/o that would be there to take care and reminds him to get loose or to take breaks in between. He's the one giving most of the time so it would be nice if it's the opposite once in a while. It doesn't need to be anything too grand, just a gentle reminder from you or maybe you can be sweeter and put a small note in between his school books with tiny scribbles here in there that reads "Daily reminder: Take a break in between! ;)". He definitely would not show it to anyone else in case he gets embarrassed, but he really appreciates that someone cares for him this much and wants the best for him despite the way he keeps burdening himself with work and chores and doesn't have too much free time. - Like Kalim, he probably needs someone who is also stable and has balance in their life so they can manage themselves better without needing other's help, he would be impressed his s/o knows how to organize things so well without his help (since he usually ended up being the helping hand most of the time) and wonder if you grow up being by yourself or perhaps used to be the same situation as him... Either way, he would compliment you for your independence and admit it out loud, he isn't a person who saves the praising for nothing. Speaking of that, maybe you could give some compliments to him too in return for his hard work. He is used to praises, but if it comes from you then it just hits differently. It feels like he actually got appreciated genuinely with kindness! - He's a member of the basketball club and is very good at the said sport, so I think he would like a s/o that also has decently good stamina to keep up with him. As in whenever he's busy, you can be there to help him out including all the heavy work too. And don't let his "It's okay, I'm used to it" get to you! Or maybe whenever the chances come, be the one that serves him. No, not as in the literal sense of serving like a servant, but just let him sit down, take a breather, and make sure he got enough rest (and no but for him!) - He won't have a preference much for appearance in my opinion, he is pretty open to any type of look, but perhaps he would like someone who is more expressive or cheerful looking than him. He isn't a very emotional person, so if he sees his partner being lively and happy then he'll unconsciously smile before he realizes it, even though he sighs at first after that realization (He does sigh a lot, but it's more like in a "guess it can't be helped then" kinda way y'know). - Bonus: Acts of gratitude and kindness will get him to fall for someone the most. If his s/o is willing to lend a helping hand or make the work lighter for him, he'll be thankful though he might insist that you don't need to help him (since he is used to it), but don't give up! It always takes time for a person to fall in love, and that includes Jamil so just be patient, your kindness will surely get to his heart 💖

-----------------------------------

👑 Vil 👑

- In my opinion, he would have the highest standard when it comes to appearance out of all the characters in here. I mean, he's the housewarden of Pomefiore we're talking about here, his standard is if not, someone that looks like they take care of themselves well at the very least. He will not stand people that don't do self-care or at least pay attention to their appearance! As the sentence goes "How you look is how you treat yourself", he is definitely taking that motto seriously (and no but!). - However, despite his strict nature, he's still a person with a soft side deep down. If his s/o is someone who isn't confident about their appearance or feels like they look "bad", he's here to erase those thoughts away! He'll make sure his s/o is the most shining diamond in the crowd, that they'll look as pretty as him to show how powerful you two are as a couple, and nobody will get to slander you or your look, not when the dorm leader of Pomefiore is here. Those who bully you will never get to see the sunlight again the moment he find out, he can be very terrifying if he's angry after all, and he isn't someone weak either, only fools would dare to pick a fight with him or you - his precious, beautiful partner. - Do try to not get sad if he acts strict around you, since he's always acting like that in pursuit of beauty, and he also wants the best for you. He will remind you to properly take care of yourself both physically and mentally, and make sure you get the best of the best treatment, even if it comes off as a bit harsh. He wants to see one's hard efforts they put into themselves, how much they went through to appear as they want today, it's just like him too, and that's why he'll feel really proud once his words really come through and see how confident you're in your current look and will praise you for it, like serious, genuine praising, and Vil is definitely not someone that give cheap compliments easily! - When it doesn't come to beauty-related topics, he can actually give you useful advice to improve your health or study. Surprises or not, he is very strong despite his elegant, poised look. Of course, you aren't the only one that gets shocked at this. (As you can see what happened to Ace and Deuce) Even better if you take his advice seriously and start taking care of your health, he'll be really proud that you actually listen to him instead of some other stubborn potatoes out there. - Bonus: He is pretty hard to come through, but I believe acts of genuine emotions will get to his heart the most. Instead of praising and admiring his beauty, you could admire the efforts that he put in instead. Tell him that he has gone through a lot, or that he is very hardworking, very attentive or always wants the best for himself. He'll be delighted to hear that's what you like... no, love about him instead of his usual beautiful look. He'll admit it, for a little potato, you sure know how to really appreciate someone else genuinely that even he can feel it 💖

-----------------------------------

🍎Epel 🍎

- I think for Epel, he would need someone who wouldn't judge others based on their look and look at their real strength instead. As someone appearing ephemeral and dainty, he would often get called pretty in a way that makes him sound weak, and it's not something he likes at all. So, as his s/o, the first thing you should do is not judging him and treat him equally! He'll like compliments but not those that make him sound too cutesy or fragile. - Maybe his s/o could be someone that has the same situation as him: appearing weak but having a strong and somewhat even rumble personality. You two would get along due to the mutual feelings of understanding each other's struggles. He would find relief knowing someone having the same troubles as him as you guys both talking and laughing to each other, gradually getting relaxed the more you two hung out. Epel rarely ever shows his real self to someone else due to how difficult to make out what he's saying with his accent, but with you, he feels like it's a normal thing as you also show your real side to him as well more than just one time, it's like a mutual thing. It's okay if you didn't get what he meant at first but I think you'll... get it eventually. - I think he would like a s/o that is also physically strong, as he always admires and looks up to Savanaclaw students for that reason, so the moment he found out how easily you can lift up those chairs or have good stamina, our apple boy would be impressed! Even better if you rarely ever show your strength, he will ask you such things like how can you be that strong?? Or teach him your training methods! And maybe he would end up idolizing you even, for how amazing you're to him! - I think he'll like a s/o that is also pretty creative in their work. Since he has a great apple-cutting skill and can turn a normal apple into beautiful pieces of art so they'll attract others better, that's why he'll be impressed seeing someone artistic or creative with turning normal, ordinary things into arts like him. It feels like you're someone who can see the beautiful potential from the plainest thing ever without any judgment beforehand, like how you see the real, hidden strength in him despite his appearance. - Bonus: For someone who is actually very competitive and rumbles on the inside, maybe he'll fall for someone who is on the same level of competitiveness as him. Just you two going around having fun activities, like flying around the school with the broom, playing magishift together, etc. Or even having competitions of the most random thing ever, Epel feels like he doesn't need to restrict himself in any way whatsoever when he's with you, and that would get him to fall for you so much 💖

-----------------------------------

🏹Rook🏹

- A true fan of beauty, he would praise anyone with pretty words or being a bit... overwhelming with it. So I think he doesn't really have a big preference since in a sense he would literally call others pretty, but if his s/o is someone who also loves beauty or somehow gets what he means then he'll be so impressed he starts praising you a whole lot instead. (It's his way of showing affection, so I hope you can keep up with it). He tends to find other people interesting in one way or another, and thus he would feel the same about you, so try to not be too startled if he suddenly appears out of nowhere and greets you in French or asks you the most random question ever (whether you expect it or not). He's pretty affectionate in his own way after all. - Although he may look and act like it, I think he can tell when someone has a beautiful heart or not. If his s/o is someone with an admirable, pretty heart then you're about to catch him painting a portrait of you soon enough with tears in his eyes (he means it genuinely though, looking like it or not). People often find him weird due to his eccentric personality so trust me, you aren't the first one that feels like that... but once you get used to it and start talking to him more often, you'll find out that he's actually a really kind, supportive person. He loves encouraging others and seeing their strength, such a sparkly, beautiful thing to see one's willpower! (according to him) - He is also a pretty sociable person, so maybe his s/o could be someone who can be sociable enough or have enough energy to keep up with random conversations, it would be tiring to be in a relationship with someone like him when you don't like socializing now wouldn't it? Of course, as a (surprisingly) attentive person, he'll know how to set the boundary between you two, but he always hopes you're up for a conversation with him since you're so interesting! He's amazed every time he watches over you and your behavior (it's just one of his habits... as a hunter, or so he said). - Since he has a very specific sense of beauty and art, maybe his s/o could also be a fellow appreciator of art and poetry. Not many people are seriously into arts as they would find it rather "old-timed", so the moment he knows, he'll be super whipped with you and the way you view art in your eyes! It doesn't even have to be historical, renascence type of art, if your sense of beauty is unique, he'll be attracted to them as well and to you, that just means you're so special in his eyes~ - Bonus: He is definitely into surprises no doubt! A small bouquet, a random doodle or sketch or even just a compliment will do, he loves it when he receives such beautiful things from you that he might end up shedding tears (again, but it's a good thing y'know) 💖

-----------------------------------

To be continued! Stay tuned for part 3~

[murkycran]

Radiostatic/Voxal Fic Rec List

Welcome to my Radiostatic/Voxal Fic Rec List! ^_^ This will include romantic, platonic, and/or queerplatonic Radiostatic fics (and admittedly probably a couple of Radiosilence fics, too).

I will keep updating this periodically as I read more fics, so feel free to check back every once and a while! I'll reblog it when I update it, plus make a note with the date at the top. Trust me, this is by no means a complete list; there's fics I still want to add to this that I just haven't gotten to yet. I just decided to go ahead and post it anyways, because if I kept waiting until I ran out of fics to rec I'd probably be working on this forever.

These are not in any particular order; I'm going by both my Bookmarks list on AO3 and my memory of fics I forgot to bookmark. I also tried to make notes on what fics were written before season 1 released, but I might have missed some, so keep that in mind.

Please let me know if any links don't work or are wrong!

✨Before you proceed:✨ read the tags on these fics if you decide to read them. Many of them have heavy material - no surprise given the fandom, but still, felt like this needed said. On that note, there's also fics with explicit material and some fics are straight up PWP. Again, read at your own risk/heed the tags.

Fic Rec List Masterpost

Staticmoth Fic Rec List

Misc. Vox Fic Rec List

------

Radio Healed the Video Star by Aspiring_Forest_Witch

Summary: Alastor comes across an unconscious and battered Vox while out on one of his strolls. He feels compelled to bring him back to the hotel.

Notes: 98% of this fic was written before season 1 was released, so keep that in mind, because there's obviously going to be inconsistencies with canon. It's nearly finished (at least according to the author's notes in the latest chapters, I think). I suggest pacing yourself with this one - it's nearly 700k words long. I ruined a good sleep schedule staying up to get through it. (So worth it though.) There are quite a few OCs in later chapters, but they're such good OCs. You fall in love with them just as much as the canon characters, I swear. I would die for Verity and the Trio.

Let's Misbehave by joosymango

Summary: Alastor wins a bet against Vox, now his rival must stop pestering him for two weeks. It should be a pleasant break! So why does he miss the idiot?

Notes: Vaguely inspired by Aspiring_Forest_Witch's Radio Healed the Video Star. Also largely written before season 1 release. First fic I read for the HH fandom. ^_^

Safe with Me Series by rillo (rillyrillo)

Summary: Having only ever set his sights on men who treat women with odious disrespect, Alastor never thought he'd take interest in Vox's turbulent relationship with his fiancé and business partner, Valentino. He decides to lend a helping hand in the hopes of getting Vox out of his sticky situation. After all, what are childhood enemies for?

Unfortunately, neither Alastor nor Vox could've predicted the rollercoaster of unsaid emotions and future horrors that are thrown their way. Will they be able to rely on each other and get by unscathed? Or will destiny have other plans for these two?

[HUMAN AU] [There's art included for the human designs]

Notes: It's so, so good. ;-; Heed the tags. There's a prequel consisting of oneshots, plus a sequel (listed below, bc I can't not put it here)! And there's ART! So much art!

You, My Everything by rillo (rillyrillo)

Summary: Some say that love can conquer all, even in Hell.

Vox begged to differ, and he was damn well sure Alastor did too – or at least he would be, if Alastor hadn’t become one big question mark.

Sequel to Safe with Me.

Notes: Only read if you've read Safe With Me!!! Still pretty early in the story but so good. ;-; The angst, I swear...

You're on the Air by rillo (rillyrillo)

Summary: A series of short, daily conversations between a radio host and his avid listener, as the two learn more about each other’s lives over the air. Set in the late 90s/early 2000s.

Notes: Same author as Safe with Me, but not set in the same universe! This one is set up in a literal radio show format; almost entirely dialogue-centric.

Of Candied Pine and Cherried Smoke by rillo (rillyrillo)

Summary: Inspired by x_Arcticfox_x’s fanfiction: Blue Raspberries And Cherry Cola

After overdosing on them one too many times to curb the steadily weakening suppressants, Vox's body rejects them outright. Now with his scent getting stronger, he finds himself struggling to hide his true status as an Omega. In his desperation, he seeks help from the one person that knows his secret: Alastor.

Notes: Omegaverse. Same author as Safe with Me series and You're on the Air!

Blue Raspberries And Cherry Cola by x_Arcticfox_x

Summary: Vox is an omega, that's his biggest secret.

During his life time he hid this fact using suppressants, and counited to in death. One day he runs out of pills and his supplier is out of stock for the time being so Vox is forced to submit to the torture of going through heat for the first time in decades.

Too bad his business partner only see's omega's as mere object's...

But hey, at least Angel found him just in time, right?

Notes: Omegaverse. Currently on hold, but has 14 chapters currently available for reading. :)

Once Bitten, Twice Shy by The_Penny_Tails

Summary: Alastor decides that it's time to claim what is rightfully his, consequences be damned.

Notes: It's not porn but it might as well have been for how fucking intense this scene was. 😳

Dripping Pink by The_Penny_Tails

Summary: Just before an Overlord meeting, Alastor gets infected by an off-market, highly potent, and incredibly dangerous love potion. Nobody realises until it's too late.

Notes: Simultaneously funny as fuck and erotic as all hell. I suffered from so much secondhand embarrassment on Vox's behalf. It's wonderful. :D

Lucidity's Fog by The_Penny_Tails

Summary: Ever since he met Alastor, Vox has been having raunchy dreams about the deer. Those dreams suddenly stop when Alastor disappears. For seven years, he's free of the guilt, of the shame brought on by his unconscious desire.

Until Alastor comes back, and Vox is plagued by a new dream the same day he finds out about the news. This time, however, something is distinctively different about how the deer is acting.

Notes: Author tagged for light angst, but ngl the ending did not feel like 'light' angst to me lol. Hurt in a good way.

Finger Tips and Dotted Lips by The_Penny_Tails

Summary: Alastor has sensitive hands; he finds this out at the most inconvenient time possible. Unfortunately, Vox is the one who ends up paying the price for it.

Having to help a seemingly broken Overlord whilst navigating this new discovery proves to be a little more taxing than the Radio Demon could ever have imagined.

Notes: Alastor is such a troll in this omg.

Thawing Out by Seaside_Dreaming

Summary: Seeing a small crack in Vox's screen nags at Alastor more than he likes to admit.

Vox wishes things were better. Sooner or later, Alastor has to come to terms with the fact he has feelings, in general.

Notes: Written before season 1 release. HIGHLY suggest reading the prequel one-shot. It's not necessary to understand the plot here, but you should read it anyway.

Static by passthevoxcord

Summary: Vox creates a new and improved version of himself to please Val, only to be replaced by it. He is left beaten and broken with no one to turn to . . . except maybe his oldest enemy, Alastor.

Notes: Written before season 1 release.

Hating you feels so good by TwoBitJester

Summary: Vox obsesses over his returned enemy and finds himself a little too wound up

Notes: Very good PWP.

Laced Over Dinner by hazbinhearts

Summary: Vox is persuaded to dress a little differently over dinner for Alastor, but finds it remarkably uncomfortable as the night goes on. Written for VoxWeek21 Day 3: dressing up [appearance, formal, dance].

Notes: Written before season 1 release. Corsets. 😳

Observer by DeviousPossum

Summary: He moved the cursor to click off, when he suddenly heard a very recognizable static laced tone.

Alastor.

Alastor.

What the fuck. Alastor is singing.

Vox unintentionally ran claw marks across his desk, an increasingly common habit for him as of late. He grimaced at his now ruined table and unsuccessfully tried to reel in an inexplicable feeling that could only be described as jealousy.

Notes: Porn with a tiny bit of plot in the first chapter. :3

RadioTV Week 2021 Series by Heliosolar

Summary: Pretty much the title; various prompts.

Notes: Written before season 1 release. All worth reading, though they aren't connected.

Sharkblocking by Anonymous

Summary: Alastor is Vox’s number one rival. Incidentally, though nobody involved is aware of it, Alastor’s number one rival is actually Vox’s pet shark.

In which Alastor is actually a little obsessed back and Vark is the biggest obstacle to Radiostatic short of canon itself.

Notes: VARK!

Control + V by TooManyPsuedonyms

Summary: Vox and Alastor have a... thing. Not quite a relationship, but something. Vox is too scared to define it properly, and Alastor is dead set that Vox will eventually get bored of his lack of reciprocity and move on.

So, Valentino tries to show Vox what he is missing.

... too bad Vox didn't want him like that. ... too bad Alastor didn't know want is a vague word.

Notes: Heed the tags!!! There's currently a sequel; I haven't read it yet, but I definitely plan to. 👀

gift of the magi by vol_ctrl

Summary: "... Although husband and wife are now left with gifts that neither one can use, they realize how far they are willing to go to show their love for each other, and how priceless their love really is ..."

Alastor/Vox established relationship fluff.

Notes: Written before season 1 release. Very sweet. ^_^

the lost tape by vol_ctrl

Summary: There's a NEW ambitious media demon in Pentagram City. You never get a second chance to make a first impression, right?

Notes: Written before season 1 release.

12 Days of Yuletide by vol_ctrl

Summary: A parody of the 12 Days of Christmas traditional tune, as can only be done by Vox gifting to his beloved adversary.

Or, a series of letters from the desk of Alastor upon receiving a series of increasingly elaborate gifts from his insufferably modern foil during the holiday season.

Notes: Written before season 1 release.

Fear makes the heart grow fonder by Graysongirl

Summary: After a bit of inspiration from an unlikely source Vox comes up with the plan that scaring Alastor is the best route to gaining his affections. The haunted house at LuLu World seems like the perfect (safe) environment for a bit of pre-planned scaring...

[Stand-alone staticradio]

Notes: Written before season 1 release. Funny af. "Red! Red!" XD

Cordyceps, King of Ants by spappest

Summary: Vox is tired. Of Valentino. Of Velvette. Of Alastor, and Hell, and everything in between. He can't escape, but he can cut himself off, piece by piece, until he feels nothing at all. Alastor takes exception to this approach and commissions a certain princess of Hell to fix his foe. Now Vox has a hotel of misfits on one side of him, overlords on the other, and Alastor crushing his cage ever smaller.

Clearly, the only way Vox will get any peace and quiet is to just kill God.

Valentino did always tell him that he had no chill.

Notes: Started before season 1 was released. Technically features Staticmoth but it's not the focus as much as Radiostatic (which honestly has a relationship status of ??? not romantic but also not friendship or even strictly enemies...just...Alastor and Vox). O_O I think about this fic on a daily basis.

Russian Roulette by spappest

Summary: Vox and Alastor play a game that Vox is way too excited to lose.

Notes: Started before season 1 release. Take note!!! I'm putting this on the Radiostatic list because it's almost entirely centered on Alastor and Vox's dynamic, but the romantic relationship is Staticmoth. The Staticmoth is just not featured very much.

Vox and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Afterlife by spappest

Summary: Alastor goes into rut.

Vox has a bad time. Then a good time. Then a very bad time. Then a brief vacation. Then a confusing time.

Notes: Background Staticmoth, but Radiostatic is most prominent. Funny af. Alastor and Vox have...a very special relationship. Lol.

Killer Ex by FanGirl48

Summary: Alastor was a serial killer who valued his privacy. So when someone who claims to know what he is tries to barge into his life he can't let them live, his secret must be protected at all cost.

A normally easy task easy task becomes complicated when Alastor's ex-boyfriend is dragged into the whole thing forcing the serial killer to go visit them for the first time in seven years.

Notes: Human AU. Love me some possessive Alastor. <3

Negotiations by FanGirl48

Summary: Vox had no interest in attending a meeting between Heaven and Hell following the failed attack by the Adam and his Exterminators. Alastor's little gremlin caused the mess, so he can go clean it up. Vox had nothing wanted nothing to do with the radio demon, king of hell or heaven.

But that was before Lucifer made the media overlord aware of Valentino's little job offer to his daughter.

Damnit Valentino!

Notes: "And they were roommates!" "Oh my god they were roommates"

Down, Up, and Back Down by CowboyEnthusiast

Summary: Vox dies. Surprisingly no one takes this well.

Or, Vox dies and Alastor tries to drag his soul back from Purgatory.

Notes: Another fic I think about daily... Heavy themes. Heed the tags.

Hold Me Like a Grudge by Rachello344

Summary: Alastor has spent a long time running from Vox. Vox has chased after him almost as long. When suppressants fail throughout the city, they finally collide.

Notes: Omegaverse. Fun fact about this author: all their Radiostatic fic titles are from Fall Out Boy lyrics lol. (I fucking love FOB sue me.) I haven't yet read all of Rachello344's Radiostatic fics, BUT I have them all on my To Read list because I've loved everything I've read of theirs so far lol.

What Makes You So Special? by Rachello344

Summary: With Lucifer’s return to the Pride Ring, the other Deadly Sins were bound to take notice. When Asmodeus stops by the Pride Ring to visit the Morningstars, the Vees are able to make a deal to host a pop-up shop of the incredibly popular Lust Ring establishment, Ozzie’s, bringing it to the Pride Ring for the first time.

When Vox and Alastor both attend the restaurant’s opening night, long repressed sparks fly, forever changing their relationship.

Notes: Because of the pacing of this (sex first romance later), I feel like this is the Radiostatic equivalent of Femalefonzie's Freak-A-Zoid (a really good Staticmoth fic). This is hands down one of the most romantic Radiostatic fics I've read. ^_^

Hold Me Tight (or Don't) by Rachello344

Summary: Alastor and Vox finally come to an understanding, both of each other and of what they each mean to the other. Their relationship evolves accordingly, one concession at a time, until they both get everything they could possibly want: power, companionship, and even love.

Notes: So, so good.

Keep You Like an Oath by Rachello344

Summary: Alastor normally wouldn’t bother with the chore—breaking into V Tower was quite a lot of work, even for him—but he found himself curious about what Vox and his little friends might be working on. Especially since whatever it was had Angel concerned enough to report back to the rest of the hotel about it.

Of course, before he can learn anything, he’ll need to sneak past Vox’s watchful eye…

Notes: God it's just...so good. Read it. Radiostatic reconciliation. One thing I love about Rachello344 writing Radiostatic is Alastor's terms of endearment for Vox. ^_^

To Be Yours by pinegreenapples

Summary: Alastor hears something he hasn't heard in years. He decides to investigate why now, of all times, this frequency has turned back on. Vox is not amused.

Notes: Hurt no comfort. Hurts so good, though. ;-;

oleanders in june by spoondrifts

Summary: It seems like while Alastor was off preying on the self-destructive addictions of desperate sinners, Vox was off getting himself beaten half to death, probably from spouting belligerent nonsense at someone with violent tendencies and a far lower threshold for disrespect than Alastor. Not everyone finds poor Vox’s chatter as charming as he does.

If Vox is unconscious, then Vox is not being entertaining, and Alastor came here to have fun, not play nursemaid.

Or: Drunk on power and itching to cause some mayhem, Alastor hunts down the only person in the city who's always up for anything. Unfortunately, he finds Vox... not exactly in tip-top shape. No matter; he can work with that too.

Notes: ^_^ Very sweet.

equilibrium by curtailed

Summary: Post-Finale. The Hotel finds Alastor right on the front lawn, unconscious and bleeding, still injured from Adam's blade. While he recovers, all of Hell scrambles to find out who his mysterious rescuer is.

Meanwhile, Vox tries not to freak out that he might have accidentally made a soul bond to save that deer asshole's life. All he had wanted to do was to scope out the ruins of Alastor's radio tower. Fuck him for being curious, he supposed.

Notes: This fic has me in a CHOKEHOLD. I love the characterizations so, so much. Manages to fit in humor alongside the angst. One of the best fight scenes I've ever seen put into words. Curtailed really took Vox and Alastor as characters and planned out a cool fucking fight scene using their unique abilities. I automatically love anything tagged with "one fell first but the other fell harder" lol.

candlelight by curtailed

Summary: Despite the #SirRepentious success, Heaven remains skeptical of a sinner's ability to change. Logic gets lost somewhere, and really, what's a better way to show sinners can be marginally less horrible than to stick two Overlords who hate each other in the same living space?

OR

Alastor and Vox play house.

Notes: The comedy of Alastor and Vox being forced to be civil with each other and then unintentionally becoming very domestic together. Lol

wallow by curtailed

Summary: A 2+1 fic. Two times when Alastor and Vox were in a love triangle (hard quote on love, hard quote on triangle), and the one time Alastor had Vox to himself.

Notes: Only 1 (very good) chapter so far, but safe to say pretty heavy already. Heed the tags.

Addicted by Dancingdog

Summary: After the latest argument with Valentino, Vox finds himself at the Hazbin Hotel. An injured Alastor is less-than-pleased to see him, which is understandable considering they are enemies.

But as more and more of Valentino's venom leaves his system, Vox begins to remember his days before V-Tower and he learns exactly why Alastor rejected his offer all those decades ago.

His memories return in fits and spurts - not all of them good. His past with Alastor isn't something he expected and it turns out that he isn't the only one suffering.

Notes: Dude. This fic hurt me. Such good angst.

Radio Made the Video Star Series by songofhell

Summary: Snippets of Vox and Alastor's afterlife, and their journey from strangers to friends to enemies to... something more.

Notes: Pretty much what the series summary says - a series of installments that chronicle the beginning and subsequent evolution of Alastor and Vox's relationship. Very good, has tons of possessive!Alastor, which I die for.

Uneasy by Saezs

Summary: “Something’s wrong with Voxy.”

Velvette’s eyes snapped to the tall moth pimp. “And?” she prompted with a raised eyebrow. As if she needed to deal with two piss babies this close to a show. Valentino shrugged, tapping away on his phone, and walked away to stand threateningly close to her new models. Before she could snap at him, she saw it; his wings were twitching. Barely noticeable to strangers, just under the hum of the building’s lights, he was squeaking with each tap of his fingers. She felt unease and a healthy dose of aggravation swirl in her stomach.

Or: Vox was roofied and sexually assaulted. Velvette tries to be better than her mother. Unexpected connections are formed.

Notes: Heed the tags! Features genderfluid Vox. :)

Five Times Vox and Alastor Danced and One Time They Didn't by Drowsy_Salamander

Summary: “I say, good fellow, what are you doing on the ground like that?”

The voice was perky, cheerful, and bright. It had a crisp mid-Atlantic accent, the kind Vox remembered being all the rage for stage and film performers back when he first entered the broadcast industry. The diction was crystal clear with every sound enunciated separately to maximise clarity, the consonants clicked and the vowels were broad. It was a performer’s voice.

A voice for radio.

Oh shit.

... Five times Vox and Alastor danced and one time Vox and Alastor didn't.

From their first meeting through their friendship, to their enmity and fighting. From infatuation to yearning to animosity. Dancing is a partnership, is it not?

Notes: Each chapter so far has been a different type of dance, which is really neat. Especially chapter 2. ^_^ That said, there's a feeling of impending doom, knowing what happens to their relationship eventually... Not saying that as a deterrent but just a comment on how I felt while reading it lol. It's very sweet, which is why it hurts to think of future chapters. 🙃

Days Long Past by Momo52

Summary: All sinners of hell bore some physical marks of how they lived and died. Some physical manifestations were more obvious while others were subtle. Vox was not an exception to this rule.

While his television head was an obvious indication of his life while on Earth, the mark he bore from his death was far more subdued. Luckily enough, his shame was easily concealed behind a high collar. Unfortunately, he is just as well known in his afterlife as he was in his life. As such, trying to make everyone believe that he is so much stronger than what his death implies is a constant battle. He only wished that he wasn’t the hardest one to convince.

Notes: I think platonic Radiostatic is the endgame here. Still pretty early in the story, but I'm really liking this author's depiction of Vox and Alastor's pasts. Heed the tags. There are heavy subjects such as suicide (very big theme for Vox's pov) and period-typical racism (in Alastor's past) present in the story.

Remote Access by x-UsoTsuki-x (its_not_reael)

Summary: In the aftermath of Alastor and Vox's electrifying on-air showdown, Vox finds himself unusually rattled. His usual suave demeanor is slipping, much to his cohorts' amusement – and concern. Velvet can do little more than roll her eyes at his antics. Valentino, on the other hand, is convinced that all Vox needs to do is get fucked and relax.

or, alternatively...

The tech-savvy overlord manages to snag a virus from a porn site and finds himself in the arms of his worst enemy.

Notes: Fairly certain this is firmly Radiosilence based on the tags (and the direction of the story so far). Very funny, very hot. Vox is pathetic in this one. Lol

Nun-thing Like You've Ever Seen Series by A_Cypress_Coffin

Summary: Alastor, the feared radio demon with more blood on his hands than most of hell combined, wasn't always as we imagine him. There was a time where instead of a dapper suit and smile he donned a simple vow and habit. That didn't last of course, but the journey is quite something.

Notes: This author has a great sense of humor, lmao. I enjoyed the unique headcanons for Alastor's backstory. The tag that hooked me: "Accidentally becoming a better person through bad domming and found family".

Empathia by The_Oblivious_Swallow

Summary: Creating new technology is boring, sex is physically unappealing, the other Vee’s are so annoying, annoying, annoying! Even Vark, his baby, his pride and joy, doesn’t stir the same joy in his heart like he should.

So, Vox had concluded that it had to go. For his sake.

Notes: Contains Staticmoth, but Radiostatic seems like the endgame (I write this as there is one chapter still left). Really interesting idea. I love Vox.exe so much. ;-;

Every Madman Has His Vice by phantasm_png (chibellero)

Summary: “What the fuck do you want, Alastor? Was it not enough to kill me all those years ago? Now, you had to go for the people I loved and the only things I had left in this fucking Hellhole?”

“It was my fault,” Alastor whispers as he approaches Vox slowly, as if he was some sort of wounded animal he didn’t want to scare off. His prey. “Vox, I’m sorry. If I had a chance to redo that night, I would never have hurt you to this extent. I’ll never harm you again.”

“That’s seven years too fucking late, Alastor.”

OR: Seven years ago, instead of Alastor disappearing, it was Vox who left instead.

Notes: I’m so fucking here for this AU. Possessive Alastor, Vox helping with the hotel, Husk is still an Overlord, yessss

Metathesiophobia (Fear of Change) by phantasm_png (chibellero)

Summary: There's a lot that can change in seven years.

But never once had Alastor expected for something like this from his old rival and older friend.

Or, Alastor and Vox start to rekindle their old friendship again after a shocking discovery strikes the deer demon.

Notes: QPR Radiostatic with MtF Vox! Contains a smidge of Staticmoth, but it's in the background and not the focus. Very well written.

surimi and venison by phantasm_png (chibellero)

Summary: A series of short drabbles (500+ words) in an interconnected universe (peep the tags, they're still in hell), centering around Alastor and his new pet fish... shark... television thing. Will (hopefully) update 1-2 times a week. Written as my attempt at a Mermay series.

Notes: Like the summary says, Mermay prompts featuring SharkHybrid!Vox, along with Alastor, who literally saw Vox and decided to make him his pet. Lol.

an arm and a leg, my dear, les yeux d'la tête by phantasm_png (chibellero)

Summary: “I mean, usually when Val gets mad he gets like, super pissy too an’ starts destroyin’ shit ‘round the set and in his clubs, but like, usually Vox can calm him down. Problem is, where the Hell is that guy? I haven’t seen ‘im round the Tower for like, a month or two now. That ain’t normal.”

“What, so you mean he just up and left?”

“No, but like… he hasn’t been seen ‘in public’ for like, two months now. It’s startin’ to get suspicious. Like, I ‘unno if I’m just paranoid or something, but… Vox is like, the fuckin’ face of Hell’s Entertainment District. When he’s not round for a bit, that’s nothing to worry about on its own… but when he’s not round for a bit an’ Val and Velvette are creeping around, looking for his rival…? I mean… the dots are connecting. If Al did something…”

“If Vox was dead, we would know.” OR: Two months ago, Vox went missing. Right now, it seems as if Alastor has something to hide.

Notes: Vox gets attic-wifed and wears a virgin killer sweater. ^_^

we'll go down together in the ashes of our love by phantasm_png (chibellero)

Summary: Glimpses into the Radio Demon's life as he reluctantly navigates parenthood with his co-parenting partner and the demon princess hoisted onto him by the King and Queen of Hell.

Loosely inspired by Spy X Family.

Notes: CUTE! I love domestic Radiostatic.

What Has Been by Tianren

Summary: Vox has never known peace. From being the son of a egocentric cult leader, to being the boyfriend of a self absorbed abuser. Vox has managed to build a pretty sad life for himself. The only spot of sunshine that had ever blessed his existence was when he met an amateur true crime investigative journalist, with a podcast named, Alastor. The man was his only source of unfiltered news and contact to the world outside his father’s compound. But after Vox finally escaped the cult he waited for Alastor. Waited weeks in their assigned meeting spot just to be forgotten. Vox was convinced he’d stopped waiting for Alastor years ago until he meets the man again seven years later at a hotel. What will reconnecting with his past lead to and will it help him escape the hell he’s built for himself?

Takes place in the late 2000s early 2010s

Trigger warning for religious trauma and abuse as major themes of this story. Will add more warnings if they arise as I go on.

Notes: Really interesting human AU concept!

(Fic rec list to be continued)

[yandere-wishes]

I'm considering the idea of a yandere cheater in spiderverse. All after reading your Miles G, I confess. Miguel was the first wave, but Hobie and Miles G, hit like a tsunami behind.

I don't ask you to write it. Just babbling about my favs... although there's also Aaron, Peter B, Noir,... I love everyone.

But, but in your yandere expert opinion, who would have the toughest nerve to become a cheater and on top of that, being a yandere about reader? From all the charas into and across the spiderverse.

ALSO, WHO IS YOUR FAVORITE, KINDA FUCK, MARRY, KILL???, Tell me, tell me *googly eyes*

In my "expert" Yandere knowledge (jk 🤣jk🤣) I'd say that 90% of the Spiderverse cast could be "cheater" if they couldn't physically be with the reader. Or if they thought that they don't deserve the reader.

1610-Miles: would never cheat, he'd just sit around mopping and dreaming about the reader. He'd also never really think about not "deserving" the reader. He's a really lonely boy and would latch onto his crush no matter what. He'd also fully believe that he was a better match for them than anyone else. He's also confident enough that he's sure he could protect them against anything.

Pavitr Prabhakar: Would also never cheat. When he's in love he becomes devoted to said person and would do anything for them. Cares for them too much to ever be with anyone else. Also if that person is in love with someone else then he would respect their choice and bottle up his emotions. Laching onto the hope that one day the reader would realize they love him more than their current partner. He's practically the walking embodiment of "You Belong With Me" by Taylor Swift.

Gwen Stacy: Gwen might cheat on the reader if she's trying to distance herself from them. Make them hate her so they leave. But really it's just to protect them, she's fully convinced that she's cursed. Anyone who get's too close to her ends up hurt. So she'll make them leave. Also if her lover is in another dimension then she might go for a relationship in her own dimension just to distract herself from them.

Hobie Brown: Wouldn't mean to cheat. But he might get tempted into having an affair. Nothing serious just something casual. But he tries to keep it a secret from his one true love. Also if Hobie did end up kidnapping the reader and locking them up somewhere then he may have another relationship with someone else. But that person is like a substitute for the reader. He pretends that they are her and that He and the reader are a real couple, but it's actually the other person. Until he can trust the reader enough to take them outside. Does this make sense? I feel like it doesn't make sense.

42- Miles: Will have some causal flings here and there to get their mind off the reader. But also watches them through their window each night. Like he's obsessed but too prideful to fully admit it. If he does kidnap the reader and sees that she's being incompliant. He'll try to make her jealous by going out on cute dates with some other girl. Then showing her pictures. Show her how easily replaceable she is. He'll obviously break her mind until she's begging him not to go out, not to leave her alone. Why is it that every time I write anything for this guy it gets real dark, real quick?

Miguel O'Hara: YES!! THIS MAN IS NOT EMOTIONALLY STABLE. Like he might just make an AI of his lover, talk to her, program her to love him, and convince himself that this is his real lover. If his lover is in another dimension then maybe he'll date someone with certain similar characteristics to her but then kinda get distracted by his duties. He'll just go back lovingly looking at them through a screen.

Peter B: He might get drunk and cheat by accident. But I think that's more something he would have done in the first movie. If the reader is MayDay's mother then no way he's cheating.

Spider Noir: He's too old-fashioned to cheat. He'll treat his lover like a princess. I can't really see him doing anything like that.

Aaron: He might cheat on the reader if he loves her enough. Like his life as the Prowler is dangerous, he knows this. So he'll distract himself with other people as apposed to getting mixed up with the reader and risking their life.

As for me: (I'll do kiss, marry, kill)

MARRY: MIGUEL O'HARA. I AM IN LOVE WITH THIS MAN. He means everything to me😍😍. I just want to be his cute little housewife. Someone he can look forward to coming home to. Plus I'd also try to help him out with his whole Spiderman thing.

KISS: MILES G MORALES (prowler miles) I LOVE HIM SO MUCH!! He also gives me lowkey season 4 Eren vibes from AOT lol.

Kill:... Honestly no one. I love everyone so much. Like maybe Miguel so no one can have him but me. But like also Miles G, so you know, no one can have him but me. 😂😂 sorry about that went full yandere for a moment.

[milliemuus]

I'm hopefully not late, but today I figured I'd post day one of @arianimates toxicchaintober! The prompt being Peach!

Wait, but that isn't all! I wish to write an excerpt from this interaction, as I feel it would kick off day one! So with that....

READ UNDER THE CUT

"Sentret's down for the count! That means Millie made you eat dirt, Kiki!"

Carmine's voice rung in the air, her doing a little victorious hop. Kieran reluctantly withdrew his pokémon, a blush of embarrassment on his face.

"Aw man...and I really wanted to show off..." He muttered to himself. No doubt in his mind he was going to lose to Millie, the outstanding Champion of Paldea.

"Why did I even think a battle was a good idea...?" As his ungloved hand pressed against one of his heated cheeks, Millie was headed his way, a smile plastered on her face.

"That was amazing, Kieran!" She lifted out her hand, going to touch him on the shoulder. Kieran hesitated, before letting her do so. She carefully placed a hand on his shoulder, a shudder running down his spine.

'Wow...to think I'm getting a compliment from her...I feel so much motivation...' He thought.

"...Kieran?" Millie called his name again. Had he not responded?! He shook his head, looking up at her.

"S-Sorry, ma'am-!"

As he looked deeply apologetic, Millie chuckled. "Hey, you don't have to treat me so formally. I'm here on a vacation, and Wanna get to know about you and your sister's culture from a personal perspective." Her voice came out in an odd twang that sounded vaguely similar to his. As she spoke, his eyes widened.

She wanted to get to know more about me?

Millie continued, taking her hand off of his shoulder.

"That being said, just treat me like I'm your next-door neighbor!" She waved her hand as she explained her ideal way of wanting to be viewed, Kieran simply blinking.

"O-Okay...!"

They really had a long way to go...

As the two of them stood there, Carmine raced up to them. "Kiki! Stop looking goo-goo eyed at our new guest and get to work! Your battling probably just took up a good bit of the research time you and her both have!"

As her words snapped into his mind, he felt a flicker of irritation that stung in his chest. Even still, it felt like the words stuck in his throat, making it hard for him to voice his discomfort with his sister.

Millie waved her hands in dismissing "Hey, he's fine. I really didn't mind the battle. Plus, I plan on stopping by that shop over there, so I'm probably really adding onto our limited-time."

Millie's words of dismissal made Kieran's heart palpitate.

She was defending me...?

A sense of understanding and comfort ran over him, something he never really felt before. Already, he felt like he could share anything and everything with the Paldean Champion. She was so kind...so considerate; nothing like his annoying sister who liked to humiliate him all the time.

As he stared deep into her, he just kind've stood there awkwardly, not really knowing his mannerisms were very abnormal. He looked over every detail...her hair, her eyes, her clothes...as if trying to retain every single detail.

"Wowzers...." He murmured in adoration for his new "friend". "I wanna be just like her someday..."

Carmine had noticed his awkward silence once again, groaning.

"Geez, Kiki! You're utterly hopeless. Pairing you up with Millie feels like a bad idea now-"

Before she could finish the sentence, he suddenly blurted out "No!"

This surprised both Millie and Carmine, the two girls staring at him in surprise. He realized what he had done, his whole body now feeling hot as he rubbed his neck.

"I m-mean...please don't." He replied to his outburst. Stupid, stupid! How could you make yourself look like an idiot like that in front of Millie-?!

Millie shook her head, laughing softly. "Again, I'm sure little dude'll be fine with me. How about this: you go ahead and go find your partner, and I and Kieran will do our own thing." She suggests, Carmine looking reluctant at first but shrugging.

"Okayyyy, but don't do anything stupid! I have my eyes on both of you, by the way." Her voice was very accusatory, mostly directed at Kieran.

"Don't make me regret this decision, toodalooo!" As she gave one last glare to Kieran, whom seemed to quietly return it, she turned, jogging off. Kieran let out a hefty sigh, Millie picking up on it.

"Hey...she's only actin' this way because she cares for you, don't beat yourself up about it." Her voice was very soft, very reassuring. Kieran's irritation faded quickly, turning into a small smile."You really think so? She's always so...so annoyin'. It's like anything I do and she's breathin' down my neck or nagging at me!"

He chews on his lip, remembering all the insults or complaints his sister had about him. Millie seemed to laugh it off, not in a disrespectful manner, as she looked down at him.

"I'm sure she has her own ways of dealing with it. I mean, especially at your age, there's a lot of things she's bound to worry about. It's going to be annoying, but it's not the end of the world." As she explains this to him, it's like it opened his eyes. Maybe Carmine wasn't trying to actually be annoying, but maybe she really was just trying to help, even if it was an irritating way to go about it...

He didn't know how to respond at first, being immediately opened up to a viewpoint that was obvious. "Thank you, Millie. I never really saw it like that..." He felt sheepish—how was he so ignorant compared to Millie? She seemed so wise...Wait, of course she was, she was a Champion, for goodness sake! This made him curious and, before he could stop himself, he let the words tumble out.

"Millie...you just met me and my sis, but it seems like you've known us for moons. How are you able to know what Carmine is feeling?" He asked, Millie furrowing her brows at the question.

"I wouldn't say I 'know' what your sister feels. I'm simply putting it in my shoes and what I've observed. I mean, she's still a girl who lives in the country, and as far as I know, she's probably the most responsible out of the both of you." She looked in the direction Carmine ran off to, seeing her just vaguely converse with her teammate. Carmine looked up from the conversation, her eyes landing on Millie's with a glare. Millie inhaled sharply, looking back down at Kieran.

"I mean...I could be responsible!" Kieran replied "She just never lets me! She's always hovering over me an' making sure I don't do anything stupid..." He felt bad, airing out his dirty laundry about his sister so early, but at the same time, it felt good to get this frustration off his chest. Because of their reputation of being "troublemakers" in Mossui Town, he never really talked to the other kids, who were even younger than him. Millie crossed her arms, grimacing.

"Well, Kieran," she starts "It's not that you're not responsible. I would say that, her duty as an older sister, is to protect you. I'll also point out that with your current party, you wouldn't stand a chance." She was a bit blunt, causing an ache in Kieran's chest. Millie noticed his look of disappointment right away, her eyes widening slightly.

"That doesn't mean you're a failure or you're inherently weak, okay?"

As she stood there, looking apologetic, his feeling of rejection suddenly turned into one of desperation. Without thinking, he grabbed onto her jacket, tugging at it.

"M-Millie..." He shakily spoke "You're really good at battlin' right?" He asked, Millie feeling his hand tremble through thr fabric of her jacket. She wasn't at all surprised by the touch.

"I wouldn't say I'm the greatest in the world..." She responds. Kieran tightens his grip on the fabric. That was nonsense! She went and beat both he AND Carmine, who was the strongest person he'd known before her. Millie tilts her head.

"Why, what's up?"

Without missing a beat, the words stumble out of his mouth

"D'you...d'you think you could teach me to battle???" His eyes looked up at her pleadingly. His heart was pounding so fast— he had never been so forward with someone that wasn't his family! Millie stared at him for a few moments, the question half-surprising her. For such an anxious kid, he sure did have guts. Millie smiled.

"Maybe...I'll have to think about it. In the meantime, why don't we head over to that store?" She thumbed over to the store near Mossui's riverbank, his eyes following in that direction.

"Peachy's?" He questions. "I mean, I guess. The lady there has always run it since I was real little, sometimes even through the night. I dunno why, but that place always gave me the heebie-jeebies."

Millie frowned "Well, we don't have to go there, then-"

Kieran immediately stopped her, waving his hands like crazy. "Nono, you're a guest, right? We can go if you want to!" He smiled nervously, mentally kicking himself for showing any vulnerability. Millie, confused, just nodded.

"Alrighty."

They both headed over to the shop, the old woman running the stand greeting them.

"Welcome, welcome! Please, feel free to look or buy, if you please! For half the price, I also will sell my hand-made trainer gloves!" Her voice croaked gently, Millie dipping her head in a greeting. As Kieran made his way up to the shop, the old lady beamed.

"Ahh, if it isn't the youngest of the Kitakami siblings!" She continued. "I see you have already made a friend with one of the transfers?" This made Kieran's face go hot again. He didn't know how to respond at first, friendship kinda being a big deal to him.

"Well u-uh..m...I mean, if y-you put it that way I-"

The lady simply laughed,

"Oh ho ho! No need to be so shy, dearie. I didn't ask if she was your girlfriend."

Millie visibly tensed at this "No, I wouldn't even dream of it, ma'am." Millie wasn't used to comments like that, even if they were harmless in nature. She looked pver at Kieran, who looked like he was a few seconds away from fainting. She shook him, causing him to look away from her.

The old lady noticed this and tisked "My, I didn't mean to cause you both a fright there. I do apologize if it came off the wrong way." She genuinely looked sincere, realizing she probably got carried away at her age. Millie shook her head "No ma'am, it's okay! You were just making conversation."

That made Millie come to a realization that yeah, times were really different, and she already had someone. Even still, Kieran was way too young, and emotionally immature. She would never admit that to the kid, though.

The old woman nodded, ending the awkward conversation. Millie turned to Kieran again, who was still looking away from her. Internally, the little dude was freaking out. How was he supposed to reply or react???

As he was stiff as a board, Millie spoke to him.

"Hey, lil' squirt," She tried to get his attention, using a more emdearing nickname. He came to, looking up at her with moony eyes.

"Is there anything you want from here, like a snack?" She asked. Kieran blinked twice, still trying to process the situation.

She wanted to buy a snack for him?

"Uhh-" His mind was racing, eyes flickering between the products on the shelves. He came here sometimes, but never really brought from the place since his grandparents always made snacks at home. Now he was put to the test of choosing something he wanted.

Millie waited for a few moments, slightly amused by how much he was having to grow up without his sister. A few moments passed and he slightly poked at the weird purple peach-thing that was sitting on a pillow.

"What about that?" He asked shakily. The old lady laughed once again.

"That's not to eat, silly boy! That's an antique from my store! That's an old antique that was passed down to me!" As she explained, he looked confused.

"If it isn't for buying, why display it?"

"It's to add onto the rustic atmosphere of my shop, I suppose. Besides, I wouldn't want such a precious antique collecting dust. It could mean something one day."

The old lady's words struck Kieran's curiosity.

"Mean somethin...?" He asked to himself softly. As he kept observing and prodding at the antique, Millie wasn't paying much attention to the conversation, already looking for something for herself. She finally finds something she wants, pointing at it.

"May I have a pecha berry or two, ma'am?" She asks. The old lady smiled

"Why, certainly! That will be 15 PoKé!"

Millie was surprised. That was very cheap compared to the prices she had to pay back at home. As she was exchanging items, Millie looked back over at Kieran, who was still poking and prodding the antique.

"You sure you don't want anything, Kieran?" She asks, catching his attention for just a moment. He looks up at her, his mind elsewhere.

"Huh? Oh yeah no, I'll be fine, ma'am." His words were more direct and polite, his mind shifting back to the weird, purple thing that sat upon the Peachy's outdoot kiosk. As Millie shrugged, she made the payment, putting the berries and other merchandise away, thanking the old lady.

"Alright, lil' squirt! I think that's everything!" She tugged on her bag until it was in the front, putting away the berries.

"And that will be for me, because I need to eat healthier." She mainly meamt that comment to herself, Kieran overhearing it but not processing it. She looks back over at Kieran, snorting.

"C'mon, lil man. We should probably get going before the other teams beat us. I don't want your sister to have my head."

Kieran's attention snapped back to Millie, straightening up before nodding.

"Okay! I'll...follow you from a distance, if that's okay?" He asks, Milloe nodding.

"Sure! As long as we can keep up with one another!"

With that, the two departed from the store, the old woman waving at them.

"Have a good trip, and feel free to stop by at any time!"

As the lady turned away from the outer kiosk, the purple "thing" that lay upon the mattress trembled. It did not utter a word, but as a breeze blew past, a faint whisper could be heard.

"Yes...he is the one...I can feel it..."

"He will be my new vessel. I just need to promise him great power...and beckon him to me...then I can regain my strength..."

"I have finally crossed paths with the child...he will be foolish enough to accept me. My time of power is now..."

[911whatsyourgratitude]

I'd like to give thanks for episode 8x05. Oliver said it was his favorite and I can see why. It checks almost all the boxes of what I expect from the show. There are funny moments but also heartwrenching drama, not to mention exceptional costumes, make ups, and decorations. All in a single episode. Moreover, an episode usually highlights the abilities of one or two actors, but 8x05 showcased the skills of Aisha Hinds, Tracie Thoms, Oliver Stark, Lou Ferrigno Jr., and Ryan Guzman, all at once. This is quite a rare treat.

Aisha showed-off her acting skills in two back-to-back episodes. I was amazed by her monologue in 8x04, and once again by her acting while saving Denny's life in 8x05. I'd been sure there was no way Denny would be killed in 8x05, but the Hen and Karen's panic expressions, and Hen's trembling voice, made me worried for a good while. I think it doesn't matter if viewers have already known how the story will end. The way it's delivered is what matters the most. That's why we watch our favorite shows/episodes repeatedly.

The trio of Oliver, Lou, and Ryan worked wonderfully in sync. The timing of their banter is impeccable. I love the way Ryan delivered his lines when Eddie was treating Buck's boils. His intonation and punctuation was impeccable, including when he emphasized that the boils might be caused by stress. And his facial expression when Eddie couldn't see Buck in the face on the next day is a comedy gold.

All eyes have been on Lou since Tommy kissed Buck back in 7x04. And because this episode cemented Tommy's position as Buck's boyfriend (and hopefully, as end game romantic partner), his performance was dissected more than ever. We wanted to know whether he deserved the coveted place in Buck's life or not. There are clips, gifs, slow-motioned gifs, zoomed gifs, pictures, and zoomed pictures of Tommy taken from episode 8x05 circulated on Tumblr. Probably, even microbes are not scrutinized under microscopes as much as he was. And boy, how he delivered! His facial expressions and gestures showed a lot of what his lines didn't. Fans love the fond look he threw at Buck, the amused and disbelief look at Eddie, how he touched Buck's leg a little in the hospital, how he rolled his eyes when Buck told him he knew how to break the curse, his sleepy voice while he was waiting for Buck to close his laptop, and so on. If this was a test to be Buck's other half, Tommy has passed with flying colors.

Oliver is always a bit of enigma to me. Like Angela Bassett, I've never yet watched a scene where I thought he needed improvements. And 8x05 is no exception. It's delightful to watch him telling the lore of Billy Boils with such concerns. And the way he portrayed Buck's stubborness about the curse, makes viewers fond of Buck instead of being annoyed by him. It is also fun to notice little details in Oliver's acting. Fans have watched with delight in previous episodes how Buck's shoulders slumped after he took care of the bees, and how Buck waved to the phone when Chimney was taking Maddie's call about Athena's plane emergency. In this episode, we caught the detail of how Buck winced in pain while he was trying to sit when Tommy visited him in the hospital. I always wonder, which ones of those details were directional, which ones were planned ahead by Oliver, and which ones were improvised on the spot. Oliver always acts which such ease, as if every scene is natural. Sometimes I just realized that his acting must be not that easy, when I watched other actors stumbled while acted on similar scenes or deliver similar lines. It is clear that Oliver Stark is extremely talented. I often wonder where's the talent ends and the hard work begins.

I also want to thank the people who have worked on the decorations, backgrounds, wardrobes, and make-ups on 8x05. Details on the Firehouse Haunt Fest decorations are amazing, so are the costumes of the casts. I bet the team had a blast while working on this episode. Also, hats off to whoever made Billy Boils. That prop reminded me once again why I didn't choose medical program at the university.

We notice that the festivities were not only shown in the Halloween costumes. The outfits of the casts also reflected the autumn vibes. Special shout out to the team who dressed Maddie, Buck, Eddie, and Tommy, and who decorated Buck's loft. Those beautiful outfits and decorations are really pleasing in the eyes. Especially in the cemetery scenes, where Buck and Tommy looked very sharp in their suits. Some fans have used a screen shot of Tommy in the scene, with green leafs and bright sky in the background, as their wallpaper.

A special thank to Taylor Wong, the writer of 8x05. She briliantly wrote the different treatments Buck received from his boyfriend (Tommy) vs. his bestfriend (Eddie), without painting Eddie as the bad guy. Making Tommy and Eddie ganged up to roast Buck is also a smart move to show that Tommy and Eddie are best friends, and not secretly compete for Buck's love like some people imagine. And

Lastly, a bunch of thanks to Christine Khalafian and Tim Minear, who have made this brilliant episode come to live. I cannot wait to watch the next one.

[rorywritesjunk]

Oh, go to sleep, Little Skylark. Fly up past the stars

After breaking your heart, Buggy is cursed to be a kid again. The last thing you want to do is be involved with this.

Rating: PG-13ish. Warning: Arguing adults, hurt feelings, apologies. A/N: Last chapter! Thank you all who have been reading it! It was fun to write something different for Buggy as a kid. <3

Title comes from “Little Skylark (safe at home)” by S.J. Tucker.

Chapter 1 + Chapter 2 + Chapter 3 + Chapter 4 + Chapter 5 + Chapter 6 + Chapter 7 + Chapter 8 TAGLIST: @lostfirefly @fluffybunnyu @plethora-of-fickleness @ane5e @valen-yamyam16 @lavanderdreamve  @jollycandyruins

Chapter 8

“What?!” He looked shocked by that statement. “I… I never cheated on you!”

“Then who ever the flowers for?!” You demanded.

“I was getting them for you! To apologize!” He told you. He took a few slow, deep breaths again before taking a seat beside you on the bed. You scooted away from him, giving the two of you space. “I… I felt bad. I didn't think you would leave.”

“You… you thought I'd stick around after how you talked to me?! Buggy, you called me a useless cook and ridiculous!” You reminded him. “You thought stealing flowers from a witch was the way to go?!”

“I didn't know she was a witch at the time! And… and you like flowers and they were your favorite colors so I thought that would be a start!” He said. “I'm not good at this sort of thing, okay?! Having a relationship is still new and… weird. I don't know what to do “

“Fucking talking to your partner is a start.” You grumbled as you rubbed your nose. “Insulting them isn't really the best thing.”

“Well now I know.” Buggy shot back. “But I'm… sorry.”

You paused, making him wait a minute in silence before you turned to look at him. “Do you remember any of the conversation from this morning? Or… or what has taken place the last few days?”

“Yea.” He hesitated. “Thank you.”

“For?” You asked. You needed to hear him say it.

“Taking care of me. I probably would have ended up dead or kidnapped if you weren't around.” Buggy said as rested his hand on the bed beside you. “And… I'm sorry for how I spoke to you. And treated you. And everything else.”

You nodded and reached over, patting his hand gently. “Thank you for apologizing.”

“Just everything was stressful and crazy for a while and I took it out on you.” He mumbled. “I was a dick.”

“You really were. You hurt my feelings.” You told him. “And maybe I was a bit petty in how I left, but I felt justified. Richie deserved that steak.” You rubbed your nose and sniffed. “My things are still at the inn.”

“I'll send someone to grab it.” Buggy said. “We need a cook on the ship.”

“I don't know, Buggy. I spent the last few days planning to leave, but I don't know where I'd go.”

“Can you stay? You… you're the best cook. I wouldn't be able to find anyone else.”

“I want a pay increase.” You told him. He nodded. “And… that pantry in the kitchen? It's huge. We aren't even using it. That's going to be my bedroom.”

“Oh.” He frowned. He apologized, you two talked about it, but you wanted your own bedroom? “Yea, okay.”

“Buggy, we aren't a couple anymore. I'm not sharing a bed with you.” You said firmly. “At least… not now. I need space from you.”

“Well, how long do you need space from me?” Buggy asked with a frown. “A few months? Weeks?”

“Just give me my space.” You sighed. “This has been a hard week for me.”

“You?! What about me?!” He demanded. “I was a child and almost kidnapped!”

“And? I was dragged back into this by Mohji because he didn't know what else to do!” You snapped. “I took care of you while trying to make myself hate you, Buggy! I didn't want to do it!”

“Then why did you even bother?! You're obviously terrible with kids!”

“Because there's some part of me that still loves you, you idiot! I didn't want something bad to happen to you!” You stood up from the bed, seething as you started to pace back and forth. Your arm was throbbing, you were angry, and you wanted to lie down. You were feeling just a bit lightheaded. This wasn't how you wanted the conversation to go but it wasn't too surprising. This wasn't the best time to have this talk. “This is dumb.”

“You need to sit back down.” Buggy’s hands went to your shoulders, steering you back over to the bed. “Take it easy.”

“Don't tell me what to do.” You hissed as you sat back down. He grumbled something about being stubborn as he pushed you to lay down and lifted your legs onto the bed. You curled away from him while he tucked a few pillows under your injured arm to elevate it. You didn't want him taking care of you, you weren't even asking him to, but he wasn't saying anything as he checked your stitches again before pulling a blanket over you. 

“I'm going to check on the crew.” He said as he went to grab a shirt. “Just stay here.”

You didn’t want to listen, you wanted to get out of the comfortable bed and leave, but you were also just feeling drained. The last week was exhausting, the conversation had been exhausting, and just… you wanted to close your eyes just for a bit and maybe wake up in a few days. Maybe the last few months were just some nightmare you had to live through, and you’d wake up tomorrow and everything would be fine. 

~

Someone was touching your arm, poking at the stitches gently, which was disrupting your sleep. You lifted your head from the pillows, groggy and confused as you tried to figure out where you were. Buggy was sitting on the edge of the bed beside you, holding your arm carefully as he made sure your injury was healing okay. When he saw you waking up he lowered it back onto the pillows.

“I brought you something to eat.” 

“Who cooked it?” You mumbled as you buried your face back into the pillows. “I don’t want it.”

“It’s just soup.” He grumbled. “I made it.”

You lifted your head just a bit to look at him before sighing loudly. You gave yourself a moment before you started to sit up. He was trying. You had to give that to him. And he apologized, that was a start. You weren’t sure of your feelings on the matter still, but he was trying. Once you situated yourself against the headboard, he picked the bowl up and dipped the spoon in before holding it out to you. 

You could feed yourself but you were too tired to fight him. He gave you the first spoonful, waiting for a reaction, and it… was okay. It was just broth with some veggies, and at least the veggies were cooked. The broth was warm, making it easy to swallow without the risk of burning your mouth. You nodded at him, cradling your arm to your chest as he continued feeding you.

“It’s good, thanks.” You told him, trying not to react as a smug expression crossed his face. 

“Well, I was sleeping with the cook, so I learned a few things.” He teased as you rolled your eyes. “What? She was pretty handy with a knife.”

“I’ll show you how handy I am with a knife.” You shot back, though with no malice. “I’m glad you remembered how much salt to use, and you chopped the carrots evenly. I’m glad you were listening that day.”

“I listened.” Buggy muttered as he stirred the soup a bit before offering another spoonful for you. “Just not all the time. I’m trying, y’know.”

You didn’t want to get into another fight, you were too tired. You just nodded, reaching over to pat his arm gently as you let him feed you. 

“Thank you for the soup.” You said. 

“Are you going to stay for sure?” He asked. “We… can turn the pantry into your bedroom. I just want you to stay.”

“I mean, I don’t have a job lined up yet.” 

“I had Mohji get your things. They’re here in my room until we can get your room ready.” Buggy told you. “I just don’t want you to leave.”

“Well, if I’m not fired for feeding the lion a steak or being mean to you when you’re a kid… guess I can stay a bit longer.” You told him with a shrug. “And you owe me flowers that aren’t stolen from a witch.”

He looked just a bit hopeful and nodded. “I’ll steal them from someone else.”

“But we’re not together, Buggy.”

“Not yet, anyways.” He smirked. “But you’ll get some apology flowers. I’ll keep apologizing until you’re happy.”

That wasn’t really what you wanted, but you just nodded. You figured in a week he’d forget about getting you flowers, forget about all of this, and would go back to trying to get back together with you, or give up entirely, you weren’t sure. And you weren’t sure what you would want from him either, but you knew you needed space. For your own sanity you needed boundaries with him, to make sure there wouldn’t be any repeated arguments, fights, anything. 

~

Your room was ready a week later with a bed and some shelves put up. You didn’t specify what you actually wanted, but it worked. The first time you went into it when it was finished, you were surprised to see flowers everywhere in there. The smell was a little overpowering, but Buggy looked so proud of himself that you didn’t say anything.

You had taken to cooking for the crew again, but simple meals due to your arm, and no one complained, which was probably because Buggy would glare at them as you served the food. They wouldn’t make any comments in front of him, even if you served the same meal three days in a row while the ship was out at sea. And Buggy was back to saying your food was amazing, that it was the best meal ever, and you were okay with it. You knew he was wanting you to be happy, and you kind of were.

Until your room had been ready, Buggy was having you sleep in his bed, even allowing you to put a wall of pillows between them. You ignored the hurt expression on his face when you suggested it, but it was what you wanted and he begrudgingly allowed it. It wasn’t like he was going to cuddle, but you knew how much he could move in his sleep.

Your first night in the room was… different. It reminded you of being back at the inn when you were a miserable wreck. Cold, alone, empty. You tried for a few hours to sleep in there but to your own surprise and Buggy’s, you were knocking on his door after midnight.  He let you in without a word and went to grab pillows to create a barrier, but you hesitated.

“Don’t, it’s fine.” You muttered as you headed over to what was your side of the bed once more. 

“You don’t like your room?” He frowned. 

“It’s not that, just… didn’t want to be alone yet.” You told him. “I’ll sleep there tomorrow night, if that’s okay.”

“Whatever.” Buggy shrugged as he went to his side of the bed. You crawled under the covers and rolled onto your side with your back to him. This was fine, just one more night and then you would be able to sleep in your own room. It was what you wanted. You didn’t want to be doing this but you wanted to sleep, to feel comfortable, but you didn’t want the loneliness that came with having your own room. 

And you fell asleep without any problem shortly after, sleeping through the night and into morning. When you finally woke up, Buggy was behind you, fast asleep as he clung to you. Maybe you would ease into having space from him, considering ever since you said that, you two spent more time together. He was taking care of you, checking your injury, even helping you in the kitchen. If all it took was a witch’s curse to help your relationship, you wondered if you could enlist her help if there were problems again.

[pleasantlyinsincere]

John and Julian (and Cyn) through the '70s

Last edited on 8 October 2023. All edits listed at the end. Text in between [ ] are my thoughts.

Since John and Yoko had moved into Tittenhurst in August '69 Julian often spend weekends with them there.

"And then I'd live for the weekends I spent with my dad and his new love Yoko at Ascot. My feeling toward their relationship was helped by the way I was treated. I was given incredibly expansive toys to play with and there was always something happening." Julian, 1982

Cynthia describes that she was relieved that Julian got on reasonably well with Yoko, but she was concerned by some of the more bizarre stories of what was going on at Tittenhurst park.

"One of the hardest aspects of letting Julian visit John was accepting that Yoko would presumably look after him when he was there. I didn't know what he would make of her cool manner. But in fact he seemed fine with it, and perhaps it was better for him to have a rather distant step-mother than one who was all over him. He never told me that she was unkind in any way, which was a relief. After that first weekend Peter rang regularly to arrange visits for Julian. Much to my amusement Julian had started to call Yoko Hokey-Cokey." Cynthia Lennon: John, p.314

Photos of Julian at Tittenhurst in 31 January 1970. [John and Yoko only returned from Denmark January 27th, so Julian came to see them the first weekend back.]

Rest of the timeline including pics, quotes and audio behind the cut because it got ridiculously long.

23 February 1970

An article is published in the Evening Post talking about Julian and Kyoko. It mentions that in 1969 there were four months that father and son didn't get to see each other and also spent Christmas apart.

Some quotes from John:

"Julian, last time I saw him, was a bit too protected, like all kids are. It took him two weeks to unwind, when he was last with us." "I'm not a daddy with a set of bricks to play with. When I'm with the kids, they just come along with me and be with me, whatever I'm doing." Link to article

March 1970

Over the New Year John and Yoko had spent some weeks in Denmark with Tony Cox, his new partner and Kyoko. That arrangement had worked quite well and it seems it motivated John and Yoko to try to get closer with Cynthia and Roberto also. It seems in the end not much came of these good intentions.

Up until now, when Julian came to spend the weekend at Tittenhurst Park, it was Les Anthony who shuttled him back and forth between his parents. However, shortly after their return from Denmark, John and Yoko made a conscious effort to spend time with Julian, Cynthia and her fiancé Roberto Bassanini. John later remarked: "All five of us ate together and we saw to it that the children see us all together. Maybe six of us will go on vacation with Kyoko. Julian, Cyn and Roberto, so that everyone feels secure. That's very important. In order to have peace, it's necessary to start inside the family." Lennonology, source L'Express [3/23/70]

Instead John and Yoko left for LA 23 April 1970 to undergo Primal Scream therapy with Janov. They stayed for almost five months in the US and returned to England 15 September 1970.

June 7th, 1970

While John and Yoko are in LA doing their therapy with Janov. One of the topics discussed was John's troubled relationship with his son.

The meeting, which Vivian Janov describes as 'a very strong emotional day for him,' had taken place in April, and John was making an effort to maintain communication with his son. From Los Angeles, John posted a card to Julian today: 'I'm sorry I haven't called or written much. I've been a little sick. We miss you a lot, and send you our love... won't be long till I see you'. Lennonology

After the return from the US in September Julian continued to regularly visit Tittenhurst. During those visits he usually played a lot with Les Anthonys four stepchildren, who at the time were also living on the estate.

"Once Dad had a little white shed built on an island in the middle of a lake on the grounds of the house. He had bought these little white amphi-cars that sped across the lake. The three of us all dressed in white to spend the day there. Crazy, but wonderful."Julian, 1982

In this interview Julian describes going over to Tittenhurst just to be an idiot with his dad but also how scary the big house and his bedroom situation could be to him at night.

[The floorplan of Tittenhurst (LINK) actually shows Julian's room just across the hallway from John and Yoko's room but half a stairway down. There's not really a closer bedroom and he may have been put there, so that he has his own bathroom. It being so far away, small (somewhere he or Cynthia call the room a closet) and scary are after all the memories from a child's point of view.]

For the most part the visitation arrangements seemed to have continued in 1971. In the summer, when John and Yoko were filming for the imagine documentary, Julian can be seen roaming the property with his friends.

Saturday, July 17th, 1971 With the cameras rolling, John and Yoko roamed the Tittenhurst Park grounds in a golf cart with Jill Johnston. As promised, Blue Pools delivered the new lake house, and the Lennons spotted location. More footage was taken of the house under construction, the Lennons and Johnston rowing on the lake, and Julian and the neighbor children reading excerpts from Grapefruit on camera and running amok in the fields. Lennonology

Lennonology

Julian Lennon: Tittenhurst was this enormous palace-like place with 99 acres, golf-cart buggies, a lake, a little island in the middle of the lake. It was like a house of fun. It was wonderful. I loved the place.

LINK to a longer version of the quote but in German. Not adding much just both John and Julian sharing a mutual love for Dr. Pepper at the time, playing the mellotron and the children daring each other to enter a 'haunted' building on the property.

It's also at Tittenhurst that Julian meets May Pang, who had started working for John and Yoko as an assistant through ABKCO in NY and had come to England as a messenger to bring film rolls.

"There were a lot of great moments at Tittenhurst that I do fondly remember, you know, giggling and laughing with Dad. And, as they say, shooting the shit. But it was difficult to know, you think, 'OK, well, is this going to stay? Is this what it's going to be, now? Can I count on this? Can I be here next weekend or the weekend after? Is that going to happen?' That was one of the, obviously, the hardest pill to swallow, was the constant change. You know, you thought things were going to settle down, but they just never quite did." Julian, 2018

"I lived an ideal life between then [Cyn and Roberto] and John and Yoko, but it all ended when Cynthia's marriage broke up and Dad and Yoko moved to the States." Julian, 1982

The big cut happens when on August 12th 1971 John and Yoko leave for NY and take up residence in the St. Regis Hotel.

At first their plan was to search for Kyoko, so that she too could come for visits at Tittenhurst like Julian. In September John and Yoko appeared on the Dick Cavett show and briefly talked about their wish that both their children could be with them.

Maybe a Christmas present:

Christie's auction

[In her Lost Weekend doc, May talks about Julian calling and Yoko not allowing her to put the call through to John. She says at that point they hadn't spoken for a couple of years. Then a few weeks later she is in the audience for George Harrison's appearance on Dick Cavett. The show is aired in November '71, so if there is anything to her anecdote she may mean they hadn't seen each other for two months instead of two years.]

26 May '72

"Lennon admits that he is scared to say too much publicly about the case, because it was the initial publicity that had spurred Cox to vanish. He talks about how hard it is for Ono to see pictures of her daughter: I have to hide them. Asked about his own son, Julian, he says: I don't have that 'where the hell is he?' bit. But he reveals that when they were in England, and Julian visited them every weekend, it was difficult for Ono to be with him when her own daughter wasn't there: It was killing her." source

28 May '72

Cynthia quoted in a Sunday paper: "John hasn't seen Julian since he went to America. It is rather a long time. He seems to be occupied with Yoko's daughter now. He does write to Julian, just normal letters, asking how he is getting on at school and things like that. And he sends him presents. He sent him a toy truck at Christmas. I don't keep in touch with John anymore. It's purely through Julian that we keep in contact. Julian loves his father. He follows his career in the newspapers. He goes to a private boys' school where people don't bother who he is. He went to a state school but he had problems there."

14 June '72

Cyn's complaints are repeated in the LA times, where it said that John hadn't seen Julian in eight months. "He seems to be occupied with Yoko's daughter now."

On 22 September '73 John and May leave for LA and only a few days later on 2 October '73 it is reported in the newspaper that Cyn separated from Roberto Bassanini.

Cynthia gave some interviews on her recent separation and the fact that she and Julian moved back to Hoylake, where Julian goes to private school.

"Unhappily Julian misses his father, which is only natural. We only hear from John at Christmas and when the birthdays come around." 7 October '73, Sunday Mirror

"Julian is always asking after him but of course John is in America now. It's been hard for him not seeing John for several years. This sort of thing is naturally upsetting for a child." 7 October '73, Sunday People

According to May's book, while John had broken up with her, she went to the Dakota to be with Yoko. Yoko there told her that she had decided it was time for Julian to come for a visit and May should at least reunite with John for that period to help him with it. May agreed to go back to John for two weeks, but it ends up being more like a year.

Christmas gift '73

To Julian from Daddy Christmas 1973

[Julian has sold an NFT of the black guitar. LINK ]

Shortly after Christmas '73 Julian and Cyn travel to LA to spend his school holidays with his father. They stay at least until the Happy Days taping they visit together on 5 February '74.

During the over a month long visit May writes, that they went to Disneyland three times and had brunch together the first morning. Meanwhile John is still having some wild times. Since Julian is staying with Cynthia, he goes out with May. The Kotex incident and nearly killing Jesse Ed Davis happen at the same time of this visit. May also places Cynthia asking John to have another child together during this trip.

As the visit ends May makes John promise to call Julian regularly.

"It is the right thing to do. I promise you, Fung Yee." He was silent for a while, then John said suddenly, "I really would like to keep in touch with me son." May Pang, Loving John p.168

Julian too, took a lot of positive out of the meetings around this time.

"Mum and I flew out to the States and stayed at the Beverly Hills Hotel. At least Mum did, I spend every minute of every day with my Dad and Yoko. " Julian, 1982

In later recollections Julian correctly puts the first visit in the time-frame that John was with May.

“Dad and I got on a great deal better than,” recalls Julian. “We had a lot of fun, laughed a lot and had a great time in general when he was with May Pang.” Julian in The Times, June 13 2009

May Pang: Loving John. About this visit and how it was set up.

In April 74 Julian sends a Thank you tape to John and Yoko for his birthday gift. Even though John is with May at this time, the present it seems was sent from the married couple.

The present in question according to Julian was a guitar, decorated with a mirror, writing and other stuff:

John writes to Cyn 22 June '74 a typed letter asking about Julian's holiday plans. Interestingly as the return address he gives the Dakota. He wants to send May to bring Julian.

19/20-25 July 1974 Instead of being collected by May, Julian sails with Elton John, Tony King, and Cyn per boat from Southampton to New York.

[In her book Cynthia wrongly remembers this as her first visit with John in the US. She also claims this visit was completely her initiative, which as proven by the letter wasn't the case. The whole anecdote is interesting however because she says that it was never the plan to stay with Julian, John and May but stay in NY with Jenny Boyd. Jenny apparently wasn't told about that plan, because in the end she wasn't there to home Cynthia. (May on the other hand remembers that Cynthia was staying with friends but they left without her and she was lonely, so she ended up coming with them.) In the end (and to John probably rightly or wrongly suspiciously) what was planned as just a trip for Julian with his dad turned into Cynthia coming along most of the time.]

Cynthia'a account about how this meeting was set-up and why she was with them during the trip.

Tony King in The Tastemaker simply writes: “John Lennon wanted to see his son, so I took Julian and John’s ex-wife Cynthia along with me.”

August 6th '74

John, May, Cyn and Julian return to LA for John to record Goodnight Vienna with Ringo.

In the summer while working on Walls and Bridges Julian visits the studio. He records Ya Ya with his dad.

Little interview bit with Julian about being in the studio.

August 19th, 1974

John and May take a trip to Denver. Instead of coming with them Julian stays with Cyn in LA.

When the whole vacation is coming to a close, it is decided that Julian should come for another visit for Christmas. John is clear that he wants him to come alone.

Both May Pang and Cynthia wrote about this visit in their memoirs. [Cynthia is clearly mixing up and merging the first and second trip together in her recollection of it.]

Cynthia's account.

May's account.

December 19th, 1974

Julian, accompanied by Apple staffer Steve Brendell, arrived in NY on this day for Christmas with John and May. Mimi was also invited but declined to come.

While they were in NY Yoko also came by because she wanted to greet Julian.

John, May and Julian flew to Florida on December 22. Lennon said he accepted Levy's Florida invitation "because I was so worn out anyway" from back-to-back studio projects "that I didn't know what to do with my son Julian." John figured that at Disney World, "I could sort of sit in a room or something and Julian could play with Morris's kid." John's quotes are from his trial testimony Big Seven Music Corp, 75Civ, 1116; In Stan Soocher Baby You're a Rich Man, Suing the Beatles for Fun and Money

Until 29 December they spent time in Palm Beach and later returned to Orlando (Disney World).

During this visit, Julian was helpful in influencing John and George making up and the thus the dissolution agreement of the Beatles coming along.

Julian remembers his Christmas visit with John and May fondly: “My memories of that time with Dad and May are very clear - they were the happiest time I can remember with them.” Julian in The Times, June 13 2009

May Pang in Loving John on this visit.

Cynthia writes about this visit in her book.

Video from May Pang's Lost Weekend documentary. [She says Long Island but I guess it's Palm Beach.]

In early February 1975 John moves back into the Dakota and resumes his marriage with Yoko.

John gives an interview to SPIN magazine in early spring 1975. In it he is asked about his private life, his recent return to Yoko, what his relationship with May is like now, and also about Julian:

How about you as a father? How old is your son [Julian] now? He is 11 now. All I know is that you took him to Disneyworld … right? Yeah, that was hell. Disneyland was better, the first time, in L.A., I took him there. Because I went with a gang, and there were a few of us who were flying a little. But Disneyworld — I was there on the most crowded day of the year, around Christmas or something. Seeing him is good. What we do is irrelevant. I went through a period of, “What are we gonna do?” and all that crap. It doesn’t really matter. As long as he’s around. Cause I don’t see him that often. How is it for an 11-year-old boy to have John Lennon as a father? It must be hell. Does he talk about that to you? No, because he is a Beatle fan. I mean, what do you expect?? I think he likes Paul better than me … I have the funny feeling he wishes Paul was his dad. But unfortunately he got me … It must be hard to be son of anybody. He is a bright kid and he’s into music. I didn’t encourage him, but he’s already got a band in school. But they sing rock’n’roll songs, ’cause their teacher is my age. So he teaches them “Long Tall Sally” and a couple of Beatles numbers. He likes Barry White and he likes Gilbert O’ Sullivan. He likes Queen, though I haven’t heard them yet. He turns me on to music. I call him and he says, “Have you heard Queen?” and I say “No, what is it?” I’ve heard of them. I’ve seen the guy … the one who looks like Hitler playing a piano … Sparks? I’ve seen Sparks on American TV. So I call him and say, “Have you seen Sparks? Hitler on the piano?” and he says, “No. They are alright. But have you seen Queen?” and I say “What’s Queen?” and then he tells me. His age group is hipper to music … at 11 I was aware of music, but not too much.

Link to the SPIN interview

March 11th 1975

John is interviewed by Bob Harris on The Old Grey Whistle Test. He sends greetings to Julian, Mimi and the rest of his family in England.

30 July 1975

About Julian ... I'm lucky if I see/hear from him myself. She allowed him over here twice last year ... but insisted on coming herself! You can imagine how thrilling that was ... she thought she could walk back in coz I wasn't with yoko!! Now we're back together again she stops him phoning me ... which he did a lot last year ... once a week. He's a bright little boy ... a bit 'sneaky' like his dad ... but he's gonna need that to survive his mother! Our relationship is pretty good --- he knows where I am and what my life is like ... he thinks of me a litlle too much in terms of 'money' etc ... which is what cyn and her mother (so called) have taught him (by example). He will run right to me when he's older ... we all run somewhere ... so I can wait. I got him well hooked on America ... which isan extraordinary place to say the least ... more on that in other letters perhaps. Oh yes the baby is due in November! Conceived feb 6. I tried to send Julia to see julian ... she was given the cold shoulder. When I get to England I'll show you them both. I would love to see yours. Letter to Leila, John Lennon Letters edited by Hunter Davies

After only five months being back with Yoko, communication with Julian has become more sporadic again. To his cousin Leila John complains that it's Cynthia keeping Julian from calling and about her tagging along the previous year. He also claims that he sent Julia to check in on Julian.

Julia Baird in a '83 interview confirms John's claim to Leila, that he hadn't heard from Julian and sent his little sister to check up on him.

"He kept asking in letters and on the phone, 'Please will you go and see Julian? Will you go and see Julian? Will you go see and see Julian? I haven't heard from Julian. His mother's got a cob on. Can you please go and see what's going on?' [...] Anyway eventually Aaron persuaded me that I should go. He was the one that when we got another letter asking, 'Have you been to see Julian yet?', he said, 'Look, he's never asked you to do anything. I think you should go.' [...] We went and John had given us the address, I didn't know where it was. And she seemed very embarrassed to see me. In fact so much so, that I backed off. I just said, 'Is Julian there, please? I'd like to see him.' And she said, 'No, he's gone out.' And I just said, 'Well goodbye, then.' It was very odd, very bizarre."

In her memoir Cyn doesn't mention John sending family to check on them but has an opposing recollection of who was unreachable:

"Initially he did: he phoned Julian as before, every few weeks. But the calls became less frequent, and all too often when Julian tried to phone John he couldn't get through. Yoko, or one of their employees, would tell him that John was sleeping or busy. Discouraged, Julian would wait weeks before trying again. " Cynthia Lennon, John p. 346

1 May '76

Cyn marries John Twist. John and Yoko send a telegram: "Congratulations, good luck, God bless the three of you, John and Yoko.”

According to Cynthia a few weeks later John calls her to invite Julian over for a visit during the school holidays to meet his brother. Yoko and John take the children for a holiday to Long Island. Cynthia also writes that Julian was mugged during his stay in NY, when John told him to go out by himself to buy a harmonica he wanted.

Photos of Julian with John and Yoko in summer 1976.

The only other person I have read mention the '76 visit is John Green in Dakota Days.

As the apartment at the Dakota grew more crowded, John retreated to the quieter and more spacious southern shore of Long Island. He took Sean with him and brought Julian over from Britain. Yoko kept him posted with a barrage of phone calls. "How goes the war, Charles?" he chimed into the receiver. "No casualties so far. How goes the peace?" "Great. It's absolutely beautiful. I've got a bit of sea and a bit of green and my sons, and even once in a while I even have my wife. You should come out here and get some of this. It's delightful." Dakota Days, p.97

[Aside from Cynthia's and Green's brief mentions of the trip, there is very little information on this NY visit. Even Robert Rosen, who supposedly read John's diaries multiple times, has nothing to say about this or the '77 visits. He even claims repeatedly that Julian and John first reunited in 1979 and hadn't seen each other for four years at that point.]

One of Julian's memories that most likely fits this visit:

Julian first played piano when he was thirteen, visiting his father and Yoko in Montauk, Long Island, after Sean, his half brother, was born. Their next-door neighbor had a piano, and Julian and his father went there one day. Lennon played a couple of tunes, then Julian asked, "Can I have a go?" Julian to Rolling Stone, 1985

Another one that Julian doesn't connect to a date but he remembers the new situation after his little brother was born:

[Yoko] was very loving towards me, even after their son Sean was born. Right at the beginning I felt a few pangs. They were there with their own son. Where did I fit in? But every time I went over Dad would lay on amazing treats, and Yoko was always loving towards me." Julian, 1982

In the same interview Julian also tells the story of his dad offering him a joint when he was about 12, so that might have also been the '76 visit, or the '74/'75 Christmas visit.

Cynthia claims she had trouble getting the money she was supposed to use for Julian's school. She asked John to split the trust fund, so that she can withdraw money from it easier. John agreed.

Cynthia publishes the letter in her book John and calls it "cautious, polite and to the point":

"I explained that, as he and Yoko were out of the country, it was impossibly difficult for me to get at Julian's money: 'Nothing can proceed without your signature - it means I'm forever overdrawn at the bank and have to wait on the convenience of your lawyers ... I want the best for Julian, and his standard of life shouldn't suffer because of lack of good management on your part, which has been happening since the fund was set up ... The money, instead of having doubled through good investment, is dwindling through lack of interest on your part ... It's just so important that this whole arrangement is sorted out without animosity or aggravation ... The way things are going Julian's financial prospects when he is 25 will be virtually nil and he is going to want to know why... It is one thing fighting for your rights but totally ridiculous fighting against your own son's interests, which is what seems to be happening.' "

[She says she ends the letter with thanking them for arranging the Concorde flight for Julian last summer. However according to wiki Concorde didn't fly to NYC until November 1977. (That years Christmas John and Yoko do indeed book a Concorde flight for Julian.) So I suspect that her supposed letter is specifically written for her book and not an actual document as the presentation suggests.]

In mid-October Cynthia gives an interview to Woman magazine that also got picked up in multiple newspapers. In it she talks about their relationship splitting after their first LSD trip, John getting upset with Julian when he couldn't eat with a knife, alleges that she was being followed by a private detective in Italy,...

A report on the article in the Burton Daily Mail from 19 October '76 also quotes Cynthia as saying:

"Since then their relationship has been beautiful," she says. "They talk a lot on the phone, there've been other visits and he's going again this year. I believe now that John is completely off all drugs, has been off them for years, otherwise I'd never let Julian go."

[He's going again this year indicates that there was another visit planned in 1976. If that happened or fell through, I haven't found anything about that.]

October 25th, 76

John sends Julian a postcard from Singapore. “What happened to ya?”

Even though the previous few months there was a visit and positive communication about the finances, Cynthia's decision to publicly complain in the papers angered John. He responded on November 26th 1976 with an open letter in the Daily Mail.

"Lennon tells first wife: Stop blaming Yoko," it read: "As you and I well know, our marriage was over long before the advent of LSD or Yoko Ono. Your memory is impaired to say the least. Your version of our first LSD trips is rather vague. You seem to have forgotten subsequent trips altogether. You also seem to have forgotten that only two years ago, while I was separated from Yoko Ono, you suddenly brought Julian to see me in Los Angeles after three years of silence. During that visit you didn't allow me to be alone with him for one moment. You even asked me to remarry you and give you another child 'for Julian's sake.' I politely told you no and that anyway I was still in love with Yoko. Finally, I don't blame you for wanting to get away from your Beatle past, but if you are serious about it you should try to avoid talking to and posing for magazines and newspapers. We did have some good years so dwell on them for a change."

Cynthia answers to the press after this, saying she doesn't want them to throw mud at each other and repeated "All I want to do is forget the Beatles and enjoy my present life". Still, only a few months later in 1977 she starts to write A Twist of Lennon (allegedly gleefully on a typewriter Yoko had gifted Julian). In her later memoir John she writes she was persuaded to do it by her husband John Twist who believed it would make their fortune.

Julian is sent to boarding school for that time. [In her book John Cynthia explicitly remembers that she moved to Ireland to write. However newspaper reports from the time suggest that the move happened later. So, probably Julian wasn't boarding at this time but those months in '78.]

At the same time communication between John and Julian was happening regularly and according to his diaries he got excited by the idea of buying Julian a keyboard.

July 14th, 1977

December 25th 1977

Julian comes by Concorde to stay at the Dakota during his school holidays.

[At the time of Julian's visit John and Yoko were still helped by the FBI to deal with the kidnapping threat and extortion attempt that had been going on for weeks and scared them badly. Also, Tony Cox had made contact by phone and agreed that Kyoko could visit for these holidays but then disappeared again and John would never hear again from Kyoko. I don't know if Julian was told any of this but I assume it probably was one of the more tense christmases.]

Going by Giuliano because neither Cynthia nor Robert Rosen mention this trip by Julian at all, John was very excited about Julian coming getting up early and baking bread for him. Julian gets close to Nishi and thereby brings forth John's competitive streak. John tries out the parental philosophy of wanting to spend time with Julian instead of giving him material goods, Julian goes 'oh, really' and John caves in. When he leaves John draws a portrait of Julian. Source

[Since Robert Rosen, who also read the diaries, doesn't even know about the '76 or '77 visits (and Giuliano too thinks they saw each other last at Disney World), they may not be the source for the above. I thought it might have been from Dakota Days but it's not. John Green mentions the '77 Christmas visit but says the family were going to Florida to meet Julian there because of the security threats. I think Green is confusing this and a later visit, so I will insert his account of what John told him on returning there.]

Julian stays most of January. Goes to see the musical The Magic Show with Yoko and the band Riff-Raff with John. 

In February of 1978 Cynthia and her husband sell their house and move away from Ruthin to Eire to avoid a 'wealth tax'. They leave Julian to be a boarder at his school. Cynthia and John Twist return in December, probably because they missed Julian.

April 1978

[It's not actually dated aside from being from 1978, I just assume the guitar was Julian's birthday gift.]

GIBSON Les Paul 25/50 guitar

"Dad gave me this special order rare model - it was always exciting to receive something like this from my dad. When I visited Dad we would sit down together and he would teach me a few chords and help me improve my technique." Julian in Beatles Memorabilia. The Julian Lennon Collection.

May 19th 1978

A conversation with Cyn and excerpts from her memoir A Twist of Lennon are published in News of the World.

John, Yoko and Sean are in Japan for their summer vacation. Through his London lawyers John tries to stop the publication of Cynthia's book as a serial in the News Of The World.

Tuesday, June 13th, 1978 Having been telephoned in Japan with the details of Cynthia's memoir excerpt in News Of The World, John instructed his solicitors to issue a High Court injunction in an effort to prevent the publication of a planned second installment. Frere Cholmeley & Co., Lennon's attorney in London, described the piece as 'a salacious and gribby little article,' although it was qualified with the statement: 'He does not deny that he held parties or took drugs, but he deplores the publication of intimate details of his married life.' Friday, June 16th, 1978 In the case of Lennon v. News Group Newspapers Ltd and Twist, Lord Denning rejected John's application for an injunction in London's High Court today, permitting the publication of more excerpts from A Twist Of Lennon. For his par, Denning was not impresses with John's argument that the article's publication was a breach of confidence of the marriage: 'I cannot see that either of these two parties have had much regard for the sanctity of marriage ... It seems to me as plain as can be that the relationship of these parties has ceases to be their own private affair. They themselves have put it into the public domain.' Sunday, June 18th, 1978 Having successfully defended the right to publish excerpts from A Twist Of Lennon, today's edition of News Of The World featured part two of their series: 'How Yoko stole my husband.' " Lennonology

When the book actually was released feelings turned out to be much softer than expected. Cyn ends her first memoir with the words :

I still feel very proud of the Beatles and their accomplishments. My life during that period was an education, an education I wouldn't have missed. It has left me feeling enriched, not embittered, enlightened not blinded. All I can think to conclude my story is to say, 'Thanks for the memories, and in the words of the I CHING, no blame.'"

After finishing reading his ex-wife's book, according to Robert Rosen, John was relieved and enjoyed the nostalgia. He said a prayer for Cyn: "Dear God, please show her The Way. Thank You. Thank You."

Postcard to Julian:

[I can't make out the date on the card. Julian's Beatles memorabilia book says it's from '71 but that's obviously wrong with Sean being included and Julian's Ruthin address on it. John makes the reference to being a farmer. They bought their farm in February 1978, so I put it that year. May be wrong though.]

March 21st 1979

Julian is supposed to join John, Sean and Yoko's visiting nieces in Palm Beach.

[John taking a photo of Julian in '79]

There are multiple, very different accounts for this visit, that includes Julian's 16th birthday celebration.

John bought Julian a motorcycle for his birthday.

At one point they went to Disney World, (which none of the accounts of the trip even mention), where this photo of Julian and Yoko's nieces was taken:

Accounts from:

Robert Rosen [Rosen writes that Dan Richter's children came for a visit. Correction: I said before that that because Dan wrote in his book that he never saw John again after 1974, it seemes unlikely to me that his kids would be sent out to John and Yoko five years later. However Dan Richter does confirm that in his interview on the Podcast Glass Onion: On John Lennon episode 16:

"My kids would go down, they had a place down in Palm Beach or whatever it was down in Florida. And they were there at Christmas and bring Julian and they would fly my kids down to play with Julian. And everybody, the sense we got was they were happy!"

This visit doesn't happen over Christmas but it sounds like he is talking about more than one occasion that happened and probably Christmas is one example. Could also mean that Rosen is mixing up the occasion for that anecdote.]

Cynthia Lennon

Fred Seaman

Geoffrey Giuliano

John Green [Green puts this actually to the '77 holiday visit, where he wrongly writes they went to Florida. I think (if his stories are to be believed at all) he confuses John's anger and disappointment upon return with this visit of Julian's. It also fits with being in Florida.]

[I recommend to read all of them. Lots of drama. I may one day make a comparison post between all the account because they are fascinatingly different.]

April 9th 1979

John writes to Mimi saying Julian would be welcome to live with them if he so chose but there had been no arrangements made.

Q: Did you ever plan to go and live with him [John] in New York? Julian: "When I was in my early teens we'd spoken on the phone about the possibility of me going to college over there. I think it was wishful thinking on both our parts because I felt uncomfortable about the situation and I believe he did, too." Hello! Magazine, 1995

April 25th 1979, Postcard to Julian from NY:

Julian declines to join his dad, Yoko and Sean for their family's yearly vacation in Japan.

[July 1979 In the context of getting one of his guitars Julian said that John bought him a Sony Walkman as a gift when they were brand-new. He puts around '73-'74. However according to wikipedia the Sony Walkman was first sold in July '79, so that present would have been sent to Julian around this time, maybe directly from Japan.]

December 1979

On 3rd-4th December there is a two part feature in the Daily Mail called "The Sons of the Beatles" on Julian and Zak.

"When I'm in New York, we go out quite a lot together round some of the art galleries, or to his house at Long Island. When we stay in we have musical jam sessions together singing out latest songs to each other. I still listen to Beatles music. Although I quite like some of my father's solo albums, I much prefer what he did with the Beatles." (quoted from Lennonology p. 508)

Also that month:

"More disturbing to John were the ongoing trials with Julian. The sullen teen continued to vex his father with his on-again, off-again plans to visit over Christmas. At first Julian said maybe, as long as they didn't go to Florida. Then it was a flat no, using school exams and a new girlfriend as an excuse. At the last minute he called saying he would come to New York only if he could bring a friend, but Yoko turned him down. As usual John didn't challenge her. Julian retaliated by sending his father a tabloid article about rock stars' sons, which focused on both him and Ringo's son Zak Starkey, and went into detail about the trials of being the offspring of a Beatle." Lennon in America by Giuliano p. 218

On the other hand John Green does write that Julian spent Christmas '79 with John, Yoko and Sean. He even says that Julian stayed until February. ("John stayed in the Palm Beach house until February, luxuriating in the sun and sea, forging new ties with Julian and delighting in rediscoveries of himself." p.229) [This can't be true however because John was definitely in NY for Christmas and New Years. John and Yoko did buy a house in Palm Beach late January however and were spotted there a few times in February. I can't find a mention of Julian being spotted with them, so it may or may not have happened. I do think between the two of them Giuliano's account is probably more accurate. The Daily Mail article he mentions of Zak and Julian had come out on 3 or 4 December, so that is also believable that it had come up in pre-christmas discussions. But of course it's possible that a visit happened anyway.]

1980

Julian called in February 1980 to set up another meeting with his dad. This time John denied him, surprisingly because he was worried about Julian's schooling. Through Cynthia he had learned that Julian was failing his O-levels, had started smoking, staying out at night drinking, had gotten in trouble with the police for setting up fires and racing through town on a dirt bike. "John just prayed that Julian didn't hurt himself." There is also continued conflict over money. John felt that Julian every time they spoke asked him for more money. "And though John continued to feel guilty about having abandoned Julian and Cynthia, he'd be damned if he was going to be like every other rich asshole father who'd abandoned his family and then used money as a poor substitute for love and companionship." source

In March 'A Twist of Lennon' gets its paperback release and new reviews are printed in the press.

Summer 1980

When John sat for a portrait painting with Sean for the artist Nancy Gosnell, he wondered if she could also do one of him and Julian from a photograph. He wanted to give him a father and son portrait for his birthday, according to Fred Seaman.

September 1980

PLAYBOY: "Your son, Julian, from your first marriage must be in his teens. Have you seen him over the years?" LENNON: "Well, Cyn got possession, or whatever you call it. I got rights to see him on his holidays and all that business, and at least there's an open line still going. It's not the best relationship between father and son, but it is there. He's 17 now. Julian and I will have a relationship in the future. Over the years, he's been able to see through the Beatle image and to see through the image that his mother will have given him, subconsciously or consciously. He's interested in girls and autobikes now. I'm just sort of a figure in the sky, but he's obliged to communicate with me, even when he probably doesn't want to." PLAYBOY: "You're being very honest about your feelings toward him to the point of saying that Sean is your first child. Are you concerned about hurting him?" LENNON: "I'm not going to lie to Julian. Ninety percent of the people on this planet, especially in the West, were born out of a bottle of whiskey on a Saturday night, and there was no intent to have children. So 90 percent of us... that includes everybody... were accidents. I don't know anybody who was a planned child. All of us were Saturday-night specials. Julian is in the majority, along with me and everybody else. Sean is a planned child, and therein lies the difference. I don't love Julian any less as a child. He's still my son, whether he came from a bottle of whiskey or because they didn't have pills in those days. He's here, he belongs to me and he always will."

Playboy: I was under the impression that you still weren't seeing Julian much. Lennon: Well, no, he's comin' here over shortly now. I see him whenever he get's off school. Playboy: Has it been hard for him to be John Lennon's kid? Lennon: Yeah, he has his own... Everybody has a cross to bear, and Julian has that cross, and he'll deal with it. He's a clever boy, and as he gets older we can communicate and he'll understand.

[I wasn't sure what upcoming visit John is referring to since I couldn't find one mentioned anywhere. However there is an article in the Daily Mirror from 8 October 1980 including interview passages with Cynthia that mentions Julian currently being in New York. So without any photographic evidence, he isn't in any of the birthday photos, or anecdotes about it, there still might be the possibility that there was a (pre-)birthday visit from Julian to John and Sean in 1980. Julian himself hasn't been completely consistent on when he last saw his Dad. He has said that his '79 birthday visit was their last meeting (which I think is most likely correct), but he also claimed that he was flying out regularly.]

"According to Cynthia, Julian, now 18, plays guitar better than his father. He has left school and is off to New York to stay with his famous dad." Link to the article

In an interview with Jonathan Cott on 5 December John reflects more on the troubles of being a Beatle's son and on how mistakes in his decision for Julian's schooling changed his outlook on his plans for Sean. [Julian had been going to private school since at least 1973.]

"[...] because he can't possibly be an average child, being the son of famous parents. I tried that game with my son Julian, sending him to a comprehensive working-class school, mixing with the people, but the people spat and shit on him, because he was famous, as people are wont to do. So his mother had to finally turn around and tell me to piss off: 'I'm sending him to a private school, the kid is suffering here.' "

Cynthia writes that by the end of 1980 Julian felt a breakthrough in his and his father's relationship. John played Julian songs from his new album over the phone, asking his opinions. source

Julian himself reflects on his and his dad's relationship by the time of his death like this:

"I know that dad's presence will be around for a long time. He was always joking, always sounded happy, which made me think more of him as a friend than a dad. My earliest memory of my father was when I was about three and he sang happy birthday to me. We were living at Weybridge, Surrey, and dad threw a birthday party for me and brought in a long cake shaped like a train and festooned with candles." Sunday Mirror, 5 April 1981

As early as 1982 negative feelings would influence Julian's memory, saying he didn't get to see his father for five years, that he only heard on Birthdays and Christmas from him or that after the first US visit it was again years before he got to go another time, when it was merely months.

"The Beatles sang 'All You Need Is Love' - and that is all I wanted from Dad. It is difficult to explain why I should feel so strongly, when we shared so little. Never once in all the years he lived in America did he even think about coming to see me. Apart from rare visits, I lived from birthdays to Christmas just to hear from him." Julian, 1982

[Those false memories/presentations may have been the result of his beginning break from Yoko around that time and the conflicts about money, or maybe his memories just adapted to the way it was talked about in his family.]

"It was more of one man to another than the usual father and son relationship, because he had been away from me a lot, and he said he realized that. I was just getting through to him and growing up myself and growing out of the silly giggling I did as a young teenager that really annoyed him, when Dad was killed." Julian quoted in Ray Coleman's John bio, pp.620

"Dad was such an influence in my life, it must have been hard on Mum. She'd do her best with presents at birthdays and Christmas, but I always waited for that special present that was bigger than anything else - from him. Yet he never sent anything spontaneously. He'd phone up and ask what I wanted, and it would arrive. I don't think he was trying to buy me in any way. It was just a chance for him to do something for me. He knew I wanted to be a musician and kept telling me to take a long time to get it right. He removed a lot of the stress I suppose other kids might feel. I didn't do very well at school. I don't think I'm dense, but I suppose I'm a bit lazy. There's only one thing I want - to know for sure that Dad loved me as much as I loved him. Or maybe to have him back." Julian, 1982

Edits: 29 April - December 1974 John trial quote added; September 1980 Playboy interview quote added 6 May - added Julian quote about relationship to his father by the time of his death 7 May - added Old Grey Whistle Test clip March 11th 1975 18 May - added info about 3-4 December '79 Daily Mail feature on Julian and Zak, added all the info I could find on any visits in John Green's Dakota Days and multiple notes on to those mentions. 20 May - added Cyn's quote for 28 May 1972. 23 June - added the Tittenhurst floorplan and the link to an extended quote from Julian about being there in German 8 July - added quote from 5 Dec 1980 to Jonathan Cott 20 July - added Julia Baird audio on trying to see Julian for John 1975 22 July - added info on a possible 1980 visit, 1973 interviews, 1976 info, 1980's quote 30 July - Spin interview '75 added, Cynthia quote from Burton Daily Mail '76 added 1 August - added bits from Julian's 1982 article throughout, transcribed some of the jpg quotes, so that I may add more photos, some photos added 4 August - correction in my comments about the likelihood of Dan Richter's children being with them in 1979 19 August - Box of Smile 8 October - Added some postcards, the guitars, reset some photographs because of the picture limit 12 November - Added the video clip from May Pang's doc

[necrotic-nephilim]

is this random?? maybe probably but the brain worms said Bart/Dick because maybe Wally didn't reciprocate and a lot of the younger heroes look up to Nightwing so like actually Dark Dick/Any of the younger heroes but for me especially Bart/Dick. Is Dick taking advantage of a crush? Yes. Is he doing it because he wants Wally but a younger more malleable speedster will have to do? ABSOLUTELY. anyway Dark Dick taking advantage of young people yadayada 🩷🩷

RANDOM YES BUT ALSO DELIGHTFUL??

first of all, i firmly believe Bart should be shipped with older men. i can't even articulate *why*, i just think he's a delightful lil guy who should be in more dead dove shit. it's fun to explore that weird balance he has going on of naivety fueled by growing up overnight, versus being very *very* knowledgable bc of the sheer amount of information he holds as well as how quickly he processes the world. he's treated like the silly, almost dumb one a lot. and certainly the comics will put him in that light, especially in how he approaches social situations and his lack of understandings on how social rules work. but he's *smart* in other ways, and it makes him delightfully fun to stick him in a position of being groomed. all it takes is for *someone* to finally compliment him on how quickly he thought through a problem, or how well he handled a fight and he's fucking putty. the manipulation goes straight over his head.

and i just. i adore a darker Dick. sunshine Dick is out. angry but still righteous Dick is also out. i need a Dick Grayson who is tired of having to be the good one. who is tired of serving others with no return. Bruce, the Titans, Bludhaven, all of it. i think a lot of times, people gloss over Dick being a cop (and the copaganda of it) bc it doesn't feel like it fits him and goes against a lot of the themes of the Batfam and how they stand against corruption and all. but i think it's fun to lean into cop!Dick. someone who's authoritative and "fixes the system from inside" and thinks "you can still do good with a badge". bc it adds that greyness to him. there is no *good* way to be a cop in Bludhaven, with the system he works for. so it creates some level of "the ends justify the means" mentality in Dick and what he'll overlook to get something done. back to the point of him and Bart: i think using that mindset for a darker Dick can easily make him willing to groom someone. especially someone like Bart. kill two birds with one stone kind of situation. the personal, selfish reason that he had a thing for Wally that never worked out and now he just for *once* wants something that's his, and who better than a little speedster who looks like Wally and already has a clear crush on Dick. and the more pragmatic reason: Bart has potential, but he lacks direction. no one is guiding him in the right way. you used the word malleable, which is so fun. Dick can mold the partner he wants, *and* the hero he wants out of Bart. there won't be any more complaining from Tim about how Bart screwed up a mission, or listening to Wally or Max Mercury go on about how hard it is to keep Bart on task.

i think Dick would be *so* methodical about it. he has the time, Bart is still young and if Dick starts things *too* early, it's going to cause an absolute scene in the hero world. so he starts with compliments. he's the one squeezing Bart's shoulder and saying "you did a good job out there, kid. that was smart thinking." and then just leaving it like that. the simpler the better, because it leaves Bart wanting *more*. craving scraps of attention and always being on his best behavior when Dick is around. or even when Tim is around, bc maybe that means Tim will tell Dick about the good thing Bart just did. i love a slow burn and i'd love if this took place over *years*. building up more and more, but staying within the realm of casual hero colleagues. it makes sense for Bart and Dick to run into each other a lot, with Tim and Wally, and even more so when Bart becomes a Titan.

i love if this intentionally drives Wally up a *wall* too. Bart would never shut up about Dick. he asks Wally about Dick at least once a week and Dick just shrugs bc *hey*, all kids have a favorite hero, Wally should see the way Tim talks about Ted Kord. he doesn't make a big deal about it.

once Bart is old enough, Dick really leans into it. he finds more reasons to "run into" Bart, starts inviting Bart over to have a place to crash while his wounds heal bc hey, even with the superspeed Bart needs somewhere to sit and let his body do it's thing while he inhales a lot of calories. Dick listens when Bart complains about Wally being too hard on him. Dick gives "sagely advice" and casually walking around without a shirt. (or: in his police uniform the first time he notices the full body blush Bart gets seeing him in it)

i think it's extra fun if Dick orchestrates a pretense like sex pollen for them to get together officially. which is tricky, bc how do you dose a speedster's metabolism. but he'd find a way. bc then, not a single person can blame Dick for it. Bart Allen of all people, in a "fuck or die" situation? just about anyone would end up so annoyed they'd cave to the sex. and it puts Bart as the one who "initiates" and feels the guilt of coming onto Dick. which is so easy for Dick to manipulate and mold into what he wants. he's got Bart in his hands and soothes him after the sex, saying that it wasn't Bart's fault and Dick doesn't blame him. after that, it's easy for it to become a repeat thing. Bart gets too wired or stressed or full of energy, and sex is a very easy distraction to mellow him out. then, before Bart knows it, he's pretty sure they're *dating* bc Dick is giving him flowers and gifts and taking him out to dinner. and Bart is still convinced he somehow caused this, so he's got that fun dash of guilt that Dick can use to get what he wants out of Bart. any time Bart acts out, Dick just has to give him a Look. just full-tilt manipulation and grooming. i think it's also fun if they publically date as civilians, bc once again, Dick being a cop, other Bludhaven cops are the last ppl to question the morality ambiguity of the age gap. they just laugh and clap Dick on the back for finding "such an easy twink". the news would filter into the hero world, but by then Bart's a (barely legal) adult and everyone knows about the sex pollen. there's not much anyone can do, and really, Dick doesn't hold blame bc he was in such an awkward situation. he has his cake and eats it too, especially everytime he sees that sour look on Wally's face, when Wally knows damn well he can't say anything.

[azrielbrainrot]

Sfw Alphabet with Lucien Vanserra

note: I think the lucien running around my brain might be a little ooc but hopefully not too much! I love him a lot, I hope you enjoy.

(since i did azzie i thought i'd do luci too)

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

He's very affectionate no matter who's watching. Well unless it's Beron because he knows it could actually get you killed. But if that's out of the way then he'll always be touching you in someway. He's the type to always kiss and hug you as a greeting even if you've seen him that day already. He's also constantly holding your hand.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

He's easy to befriend but I think it might take a bit to get to bestfriend. He probably still has some trauma after Tamlin so you'd have to show that you're trustworthy first but then it's smooth sailing from there.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

Of course, it might be the best part of his day. I think he likes being the big spoon. He also likes laying you on top of him or have you sit in his lap while he's reading or working. He'd use any excuse to cuddle you.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

Yes, I think he wants a place to call home more than anything. I can't see him being bad at anything honestly.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

He'd be sweet about it. He would talk you through it and remind you that it wasn't your fault. He might even pull the "it's not you, it's me" card but also actually mean it. After what happened with Jesminda, I wonder if he'd try to break up with you to protect you if he knew being together could bring you any harm. I don't think he could make it last honestly, especially if he saw how heartbroken you were.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

I'm not sure marriage is that important to him. Like as long as you're together it wouldn't make much of a difference if you got married or just lived together.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

He's so gentle. Lucien would never intentionally do anything that could cause you harm in any way. He'd be so gentle with you feelings and emotions and your every thought. He'd treat you with so much love and adoration.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

He's a great hugger. He's the type to lift you up and spin you around a little if he's in a really good mood too. He'll nuzzle into the crook of your neck, breathing you in, and laugh into it when you ask him what he's doing. God I need happy Lucien so bad.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

Every day. He has learned the hard way that he needs to cherish every moment while he can and he'd want to make sure you always knew how he feels about you.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

I'm not sure he'd get all that jealous but he'd still fuck you if something happened just for the fun of it. Like he wouldn't truly be upset or even think you wanted someone else but he would still fuck you in front of the mirror so you could watch him while he whispers the dirtiest things into your ear. "Tell me who's making you feel this good". "Keep screaming my name so they can hear how good i can fuck you". "Do you think that male could make you burn with pleasure like I can?". (that wasn't all that sfw apologies)

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

Soul consuming. He's probably so sensual and passionate with his kisses. He'd kiss you over your entire body to make sure he learned how every inch of your skin felt against his lips. He'd welcome your kisses anywhere but he's probably such a slut for cheek kisses.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

He's very sweet with children. He'd probably do cute fire tricks to entertain them too.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

Mornings with Lucien are spent with soft kisses and even softer touches. He'd wake you up with sweet words pressed into your ear and kisses all over your face. Then he'd give you the most beautiful smile and a soft "good morning beautiful". You'd either spend some time cuddling and smiling at each other like idiots or he'd roll on top of you and wake your body up with pleasure. You'd definitely wake up to him with his head between your legs from time to time too. He'd just look up when he saw you awake and give you a "there you are" and go right back to it until you saw stars.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

I go back and forth. He'd definitely enjoy nights in, just the two of you. Having dinner, reading together and just staying up talking about everything for hours. Lucien is definitely the type of person you could have the most emotional and serious conversations with and he'd still manage to throw some lightheartedness in there. You could go from the meaning of life to your worst fears to the latest pastries at your local shop and he would give you the same amount of interest for all of these and never make you feel silly for anything you ever said. But then he'd also love to go out and experience life with you. You would dance for hours, laughing your hearts out. As much as I want to keep this sfw, I can't just move past the fact that he'd fuck you for hours on end, whether you stayed in or went out that night. This man would never pass the opportunity to show you how much he wants you.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

I think it wouldn't take that long for him to open up but there are some things he'd keep for longer. This boy has a lot of trauma so he would just go at his own pace and wait for the right timing to tell you everything. I don't think he'd try to hide anything or feel ashamed about any of it though, he'd just have to make sure you were together for a bit before being too vulnerable.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

He has the patience of a saint. I mean we can see that with how much control he has over himself with this whole Elain thing, even managing to push down all those overbearing instincts. So he'd definitely be patient with you beyond measure.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

He remembers everything. He makes sure of never forgetting anything of importance.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

He definitely cherishes all your first moments together. I can see him lean into your forehead and let out the fattest sigh when you kiss him for the first time. Definitely replayed the first time you told him you loved him a million times in his head.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

Of course he'd protect you but he would love it so much when you protected him. That was something he didn't get too much of so it would make his heart beat at a million miles an hour every time you stood up for him. If it's a more physical thing, like an attack or battle, he'd probably be beyond freaked out if you tried getting in front of him to protect him because of what happened with Jesminda. He couldn't watch another lover die or even get hurt because of him.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

He'd put all his effort into everything when it comes to you. But I also think he likes keeping things casual. He'd definitely prefer a candle lit dinner at home than going to a fancy restaurant. And I think he'd buy you beautiful gifts but the flowers he picks up on his way home would be even more meaningful.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

He pushes his feelings aside to prioritize yours. And then it comes to a point where he can't ignore them anymore and he'd be absolutely wrecked, way more than if he had talked things through with you beforehand.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

He knows he's pretty and he likes keeping it that way, like who can blame him? But he's not that worried about looking too put together either. He's just effortlessly pretty.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

Yeah. Especially since he doesn't really have a place where he belongs, you'd be that place for him.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

He does his daily affirmations every day in front of the mirror while he brushes his hair.

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

Uptight and judgy people. Prejudiced people. Cruel people. People like his family really.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

He probably talks in his sleep. I don't know why this came to mind but I can see him murmuring random things when he's dead asleep.

[moonyasnow]

All the characters I'd considered shipping my OCs with before I decided

Quick thing bc I'm bored

Not gonna include Lisle bc AroAce and also not Tomoe, since she existed before I decided to put all the others into TWST so shipping for her was just...kinda vibes-based, and not in the good way. Like I'd barely even figured out her character yet

And for Irina, Junia and Artemisia, the reason none of the others were chosen were literally just because their current partner was SO perfect for them I couldn't have gone with anyone else

Irina

Kalim (I think this is one of the more unhealthy relationships she could end up on. Not because he'd treat her badly, of course not; Kalim's just the sort who represses all his trauma (he straight up doesn't remember all the times he's been kidnapped) and I just feel like, paired with Irina, she'd just keep holding all the bad stuff in forever and pretending like everything's ok)

Ruggie (I think this would've been pretty cute. They're still good friends now though...and I honestly think they work better as just friends)

Floyd (Irina still literally had a crush on him before she fell for Malleus, so this one didn't even 100% go away. But yeah the reasons I considered it was because I think they match each other's freak in an interesting way. And Irina also knows exactly what it's like to always go through moodswings, so they can understand each other in that way. ...Irina would've loved the biting and squeezing so much tho-)

Leona (THE BAD TIMELINE. I'm not kidding. These two would in the best case scenario keep each other from improving and in the worst case actively make each other and their issues worse.)

Spike

Silver (literally the only NRC guy I could think of who'd be nice enough to be Spike's type)

Junia

Jade (Giving 'the straight-laced science girl' vibes but genderbent. Clueless autistic and clueful autistic)

Azul (I think it would've been cute bc Junia is the type who is just, so smitten with whoever she likes, and it's VERY obvious. And she'd think he was really really pretty and would love like, sitting in his lap when he scams people)

Veronica

@babyghoul138 :)

Ace (For a while I was actually even gonna go with this one long-term! Even made a meme including the ship and everything. Even started planning out a fankid! But then I realized I'd miscalculated and they just wouldn't work as well together as I thought. And I think Ace is just a bit too rough around the edges personality-wise for Veronica)

Sebek (This could actually have been a reaaaaaally interesting one. The thing that kept me from going with it was just that- Veronica wants to leave Briar Valley after she graduates. And Sebek would never leave Briar Valley. And as much as angst CAN be nice, I prefer it when couples are driven apart by stuff like war or disapproving families rather than just mundane stuff like that. Makes it too real, and just kinda depressing)

Victor

Jamil (Jamitor would be toxic yaoi central. Victor would be SUCH an enabler like 'yes, let's kick that smiling idiot (Kalim) to the curb and put you on the throne! Oh villainy looks so good on you~'. Then with their powers combined they would go on to rule the world.)

Azul (They've got suuuuuuuch similar trauma. And I imagine it'd start out with them 'dating' as like a business arrangement-- being married to each other would be good strategically for both of them and their goals; Azul gets access to a whole noble house's worth of funds and private lands, and Victor gets easy access to some of the best people in business. And then it'd turn into a thing of them both catching feelings realizing just how similar they are and can both relate to each other's trauma. They would also go on to rule the world.)

His ships with someone similar to him just made him too powerful

Artemisia

Idia (I decided not to go with this one 1) because as soon as Artemisia met Jamil I just know he'd be IT for her and 2) Artemidia would just kinda feel like them giving up and deciding to become hermits who don't leave their rooms TOGETHER and that to me was just way too sad)

Leona (They were already kinda friends in the background, and I couldn't stop thinking of the reference potential to Kimba the white lion. And just like with Idia, the biggest reason why not is Jamil.)