#i never figured out how to do a super boop. i saw some folks getting evil boops. yall had forbidden boop tech

[anonymouspuzzler]

i dont remember if i got to send you a super boop so take this instead

gotta send our boops the old fashioned way...

[kyberled]

SENTENCE STARTERS: LET’S PLAY CYBERPUNK RED, EPISODE 1 PART 1

A collection of prompts and starters taken from the first episode of Polygon’s Cyberpunk Red campaign series: [x] 

Content warnings for death, strong language, and mentions of violence and drug use. 

Feel free to change names and pronouns as needed!

“We’re recovering from several man-made disasters, and kites are popular again.”

“Oops, that’s too much armpit.” 

“I don’t know who you know.” 

“You will be remembered.” 

“You’re not allowed to say that word on here, my dude!” 

“Boop, banned!” 

“Headshot! ... Sorry.” 

“There is maybe a job down there for us, and I could use a lift.” 

“Do you want me to come up and meet you up there, or  do you wanna come down here?”

“Doc, these guys gonna be okay?” 

“He was sliced and diced and blown apart.” 

“Saw a really sad thing today.” 

“I’m not sure how we’re going to get paid for this, actually.”

“Sometimes, you get paid in other things, like trust or friendship.” 

“Exposure!!!” 

“Let’s mop up these two dipshits and figure out who did it, then hit their head several times.”

“I just realized I called these dead people dipshits.” 

“I know all of this because he was saying it in Alf roleplay.” 

“They’re very fast, but they’re faster the wealthier you are.” 

“And they’re all like, armed, right?”

“Yeah. They’re super armed.”

“Work up a gentle demeanor, if I can.”

“This one? This one? That one? This one?”

“I’ve got a lot of cool.” 

“I promise you... You will not die.” 

“I mean, everyone dies, [NAME]. You shouldn’t promise that to someone.”

“But what I’m saying is it won’t be my fault.”

“I am so sorry for this situation.” 

“Just gonna pretend that didn’t happen.” 

“I don’t think they were looking for [NAME].”

“I think they were looking for SOMEBODY.” 

“You guys are really fuckin’ bad at this.” 

“I’ll admit, I can be a little bit bad bad at comforting folks who need it. But I’ll tell ya’, I’m really good at pounding peoples’ skulls into concrete over and over again, until they tell me exactly what I would like to know.” 

“Did you mean to threaten this guy?” 

“All I wanna know is what happened here, so we don’t have another mess to mop up. And that mess I’m talking about is potentially... You.” 

“I mean, steal from the rich, no harm done!”

“And snort what you get.” 

“It is what you said, it’s what you implied. Are you going back on your word?” 

“If I knew, I’d have blackmail, and I wouldn’t be here.” 

“Reach out if you ever need anything.”

“Reach out if you ever need anything, and I was mostly kidding about the head bouncing stuff. But I will do it! But I was mostly kidding.” 

“Call me if you need to know anyone.” 

“We’re not best friends, but I just thought it would give that parasocial relationship to people.” 

“Guys, don’t say other things.” 

“You’re making it sound like there’s more than one person-- There’s only one person in the bathroom, and it’s me, [NAME]!”

“I just needed a little bit of help in here. It’s nothing to worry about.” 

“And we WILL wash our hands.” 

“Can you wait until we’re out of the bathroom to talk about this?”

“It wasn’t even weird!”

“It was very weird.”

“And wash your hands!”

“This one’s zooted.” 

“Leaving it a little open-ended, there, [NAME].”

“Soft touch.” 

“Your eyes are so gentle.” 

“... That’s a good argument.” 

“I got some papers, don’t worry how I got ‘em.” 

“I’m sorry, that was really defensive. I came at you with all that defensive energy.” 

“I can get one, if ya’ need!” 

“I’d like you to remember that I helped you, and someday, maybe, when I need you...” 

“That’s not what I’m gonna need you for, but, thank you.” 

“What’s up everyone, I just walked into a locked room.” 

“Wow, special treat for you guys today!”

“Wow, special treat for you guys today: It’s two locked doors.”

“I guess it’s a bust for today.” 

“Your... Co-dependent.... Thing, is very strange.” 

“Is this like a riddle?” 

“Do you like to pick your own lock?”

“I sometimes pick my own lock, like, to practice.”

“Your lock’s been picked.” 

“My door’s been picked?!”

“I’m old school, what can I say.”

“If they just wanted to destroy it, why wouldn’t they just destroy it?”

“You’re blowing my mind, here.”

“We can stop it.”

“You don’t need to hate [NAME], you just need to love money.”

“I was already in the van-- I wasn’t in the van, but I got in the van because I wanted to come see you.” 

“I think you got, maybe one of those three is right.” 

“I ain’t never heard of him, no.” 

“Shit. I could’ve done this my fuckin’ self.” 

“I’ll look it up for you, you’ll owe me a favor.” 

“[NAME], this guy’s dead.”

“[NAME]’s dead, he died six years ago.” 

“You’re asking the important questions, [NAME].”

“Privacy is nonexistent.” 

“I don’t wanna meet a ghost.” 

“Forsooth! We’re here.” 

“I don’t see any problems with the plan.” 

“It is striking me as very strange, now that I’m thinking about it.” 

“We both drive. ... I also drive. It’s a-- Two-person... Driving... Car.” 

“I have trouble with the break and the gas at the same time.” 

“He just sits on my lap.” 

“And you shouldn’t! And you don’t.” 

“It was like on the news.”

“It’s really hot out in the van, can I get a CapriSun?”

“I already peed.” 

“Put your smart thoughts in my dumb head.” 

“It’s a very strange slogan.” 

“I’m so glad we’re sitting down for this drink.” 

“This was, like, a decade ago, which is like 100 years ago.” 

“You guys aren’t cops, right?” 

“We’re not cops.” 

“We split a paycheque.” 

“The ol’ waitin’ game.” 

“Let’s use our two braincells.” 

“If honesty if cool, let’s be honest.”

“Fuck yeah, come on! Shoot it into my fuckin’ veins, baby!”

“Thanks a lot, buddy. Thanks a fucking lot.”

“Welcome to this most righteous cafe.” 

“Garcon! First, I would like you to tell me what an egg cream is, and then, I would like an egg cream.” 

“I brought a juice box from the car.” 

“This fuckin’ rules!” 

“Is he super hot?”

“We did it! We heisted! We killed some people! Could we be any cooler?”

“I hope it’s the fucking cast of Friends!” 

“I’m not gonna stop you from doing that.” 

“Who the fuck is this jabroni?” 

“Name’s [NAME]. Just passing through, looking for a bit of information.” 

“I don’t wanna be too forward here, but unless you’re willing to talk with me on this particular topic, your love life ain’t gonna be the only thing that’s D.O.A.”

“That’s really good shit talk.”

“You’re gonna badmouth me and my besties?”

“You gonna come in here and sass us?”

“Well, you can bully [NAME]. He’ll just fuckin’ sit there and take it.”

“I will toss your salad and scramble your eggs.”

“You’re gonna talk right now, or you’re cancelled.” 

“This is our town!” 

“How you doin’?”

“Fuck you! Thank you.” 

“No, not that - why did you shoot people?” 

“Sorry, didn’t mean to escalate.” 

“I don’t live on the streets, I have a perfectly adequate apartment.”

“I’m sorry, that’s on me.” 

“You guys know the person you’re trying to blackmail is dead?”

“I guess it isn’t your day, your month, or your year? ... Or your week?” 

“Hey, okay! I mean, where the fuck did you come from, but yeah, this guy gets us!” 

“I did just say that your blackmail’s useless.” 

“And that’s where you should stop that sentence!” 

“In the shipping business, that’s what we call... I don’t know what we call it.”

“It’s a goof-’em-up.” 

“The problem with trucks, is, uh... Have you ever seen a bird?”

“Have you ever seen a bird that just really scared you?” 

“I’ve seen a video of a bird.” 

“If you have to steal, I don’t give a shit. Steal from somewhere else.” 

“So fuck you, I guess, fuck you.”

“I’m so sweaty, it’s so hot in here.”

“I’ll delete your accounts!” 

“You think you’re a big man.” 

“You mother fucker! I can’t believe you’d do this, to ME!”

“You just killed a man! In cold blood!” 

“I wish somebody had told you it was gonna be this way.” 

“Well, I hate to see people leave the forum.”

“I’m a moderator, this is just physical moderating.” 

“I did do that.” 

“And now we’re fighting back to back!”

“Aw, we’re the real besties.” 

“I’m very proud of all of you.”

“I’m very proud of all of you, and I’m certain that will last this whole time.” 

“I feel like I shouldn’t have a shotgun.” 

“Ba-bum bum ba-da-ba-da--” (gunshot)

“I can’t fucking follow that up!” 

“So I don’t fuckin’ care.” 

“What now?! WHAT NOW?!” 

“You guys need to leave!” 

“Way ahead of ya’, mac!”

“Way ahead of ya’, mac!” (smashes through the window)

“You did a great job of just destroying this woman.” 

“I hope these people never see me again, I don’t want to come back here.” 

“Make sure to like and subscribe!” 

“We haven’t killed anybody, have we?” 

“Let’s wrap this up right now, or I’ve got a feeling there won’t be a reunion show.” 

“Okay, okay, you guys are not cool.”

“We being chill about this?”

“I don’t know what we’re gonna do with this thing, it’s useless.”

“You keep saying that, and I keep not believing you.”

“Find somebody else to rob.”

“Find somebody else to rob. Rob somebody with money.”

“Did any of you see the thing that I did where I put the guy’s head on the counter and I hit him with a stool two or three times?” 

“[NAME], if you can promise to fight that well, I can get a lot more jobs for you.” 

“I’d also love to just hang out, if that’s a thing you would be interested in.” 

“You guys had to be there.”

“[NAME] jumped through a window.” 

“Avast! Above, I see... [NAME]!”

“Let’s just say we had to wine and dine ‘em.”

“I hit a guy in the head with a stool.”

“Let’s just say we had to wine and dine ‘em. ... I hit a guy in the head with a stool.” 

“That sounds about right, yeah.” 

“The only reason you’ve been surviving this long is because of the philanthropy of others.”

“I’m too smart for this.” 

“I think we took care of them.”

“If I were them, I wouldn’t come back around here.”

“But they are still alive.”

“If you decide that you do want them dead, you know who to call.” 

“And thanks again for everything you do. ... Oh, by the way, [NAME] died.” 

[gotyourtongue]

c a t    g o t    y o u r    t o n g u e  ?

                  the question prompts several stunned blinks.

                                           “ why the fuck would i want your tongue ? ”

( brigette lundy-paine, witch, they/them + she/her & gender neutral ) is that ( stray cat strut ) by ( stray cats ) playing? ( marjorie codere “nyx” ) must be nearby! heard folks say the ( fifty nine ) year old ( full-time meower & part-time interpersonally challenged bowling alley clerk ) was not at the letum falls thanksgiving fair because ( they were too busy flossin’ their teeth with the laces of nova’s favorite kicks ). as a result, they weren’t present during the glitch but ( aurora and nova were caught in the mayhem, so now nyx needs to figure out some way to annihilate an enemy they can’t even see. )

b a c k g r o u n d .

born in 1927 to the codere’s, a witch ‘n warlock duo who fucked with dark magic and accidentally fucked up their whole no children plan... marjorie got her name because her parents asked the first person they say in the herb aisle at letum falls’ local grocer... after she was born. sounded like margarine, which made ‘em laugh, and voila. marjorie codere was named two weeks after her birth.

the codere family was cold. townsfolk would squint at the two mysterious individuals with their quiet lil girl in tow, and their common comment was: “ those codere’s, y’know. they’d be better off as cat people. ”

just before marjorie’s third birthday, their parents got wrapped up in some messed up magical schemes, and needed to skip town. to kill two birds with one stone, they saw it as their opportunity to rid themselves of their three-year-old daughter.

the dynamic duo disappeared. but not before hexing their own child into a cat. the idea was to give her a normal cat lifespan, maybe a generous 8-10 years or so, but nope. because these two never stuck ‘round long enough, they failed to realize marjorie had inherited their gifts, and their own powers interacted with the spell, rendering them a cat with infinite lives.

this orange fluff roamed the town, before finally winning the hearts of the local thrift shop owners. they lingered in the store for years, long enough that locals would grow up, move away, visit, and still find them there. the shop owners named the cat binks.

nova caligo accidentally siphoned away the spell when she picked binks up one day, and managed to convince her grandmother to keep the cat as their own. nova and aurora renamed binks nyx and kept their secret –– now able to shift between cat and human on command, the witch lived comfortably with the caligo family.

then gramma found nyx in human form hangin’ with the twins, and their human name was born –– nicole. they absolutely hate it, but it’s close enough to nyx that they’ve been able to uphold that as a nickname instead

works as a bowling alley clerk / cashier, renting out shoes, serving soda, etc. and they struggle to be, well... interactive? they roll into shifts randomly. late. sometimes they hiss at customers. but her supervisors / coworkers ( wanted connections ) get a kick out of it.

grappling with gender identity at the moment. i mean, they spent so long as just a cat? just binks? so expressing themselves is... difficult. they kinda know they’re not 100% a girl, but... they don’t really have a comprehensive knowledge of what else they could be. haven’t opened up to many people, if at all, about it. so they’ll respond to she/her pronouns no problem. they just feel... kinda icky.

currently also discovering what crushes are? and liking girls? the heck! emotions are stupid. ew. help.

loves singing. as a cat, binks was always vocal, and that carried through to nyx, too. they’ll meow a lot in cat form and will hum / sing in human form, when they think no one’s listening.

loves shiny things. ooh, sparkly.

she is a witch but. never had proper training or anything? so sometimes she sneezes and shit appears. one time, she turned a bird she was playing with into a brick. oops.

t h e    f a i r .

wasn’t at the fair because they were super busy flossin’ their teeth with the laces of nova’s favorite shoes. but they can tell whatever happened really affected the twins and therefore... it must be killed. as soon as she can, like. y’know. find it.

side note: i would love for her to be more affected by the glitch. friends who died? friends who changed? like. huh. why do you smell different –– oh wait you’re not human. hit me the heck up.

c u r r e n t    c o n n e c t i o n s .

caretakers / best friends / intermittent crushes – aurora and nova caligo.  living with the caligos is the first dose of compassion nyx has ever got. these three are thick as thieves and nyx would tear anyone to bits who so much as looks at ‘em funny. and... maybe they’ve got a little crush on nova. maybe.

harmless crush from afar – julia .  julia comes to the bowling alley to people watch and nyx... watches... her. and julia knows something’s up with this whole nyx figure showin’ up out of the blue. no surname. no origin. no school record. sus.

shiny jewelry plug / innocent lil crush – duffy freely.  it all started with a pendant sparkling in the sun, and that’s all nyx needed to get hooked. duffy’s kinda sparkly like the jewelry she makes, too. they’ve got a cute little friendship going. and nyx always forgets how to, like. function.

w a n t e d    c o n n e c t i o n s .

coworkers at the bowling alley.  they see nyx struggle to be a human being and maybe they know the depths of why. or maybe they just find it hilarious.

perceived threats.  if you encroach on their bond with nova and aurora, watch out. this cat bites.

adventure pals.  give me unlikely peeps who introduce nyx to new wonders all the time. sour patch kids. coke ‘n mentos. they missed out on an entire life, folks, so let’s... teach them some bullshit they’ll never need to actually know.

unrequited crushes.  i would. love. for someone to be into nyx and nyx just be... totally oblivious. like. 100% casual, so chill, doesn’t know anything’s up. because if you’re not nose booping or forehead touching, you don’t like them. right? because that’s how it all works. ( in cat form, this doofus. )

idiot life coach.  nyx needs guidance and advice, and... who better to get it from than this person? the one who clearly doesn’t have jack shit together?

someone who they met and bonded with wandering in cat form, who doesn’t know their human face.  they’ve got a connection. they gave nyx snuggles and food and a warm place to stay when they wandered too far from home. their visits likely tapered off after the caligo’s took nyx in, but they still managed to sneak away now ‘n then. i’d love for this person to think nyx looks familiar but... be unable to put their finger on it.

[seenashwrite]

Something's been stated that's just not sitting right with me: "even as a demon, dean treated women with respect. period." I don't know if it's the way it's said as an absolute or that I have an issue with the use of 'respect'.The example gif used of Dean and Lester, to me, it's more about judging Lester for hypocrisy than not wanting to murder the wife, and the way he treated Anne Marie: he disregarded her feelings and her job which I wouldn't call respect, not by Dean standards. Thoughts?

[I kinda empathize with Lester here, as I understand am living on borrowed time with regard to having such a statement cast upon my person at some future interval, though I’m not hiring demon assassins, so points to Nash I s’pose]

Okay. So. Let’s unpack this, and I don’t think it’s gonna be the giant-ass suitcase on wheels it may seem to be at first blush. Maybe somewhere between a backpack and a carry-on.

‘Cause, see, we don’t have a ton to work with - we really only have scant amounts of observational information on Demon!Dean. They’re poignant, though, to be sure. The way I figure, neither you nor I -  nor the originators/supporters of the stance you relate in your Q - should pluck out a singular moment and presume it paints an entire picture of a person’s character, fictional or no, current state of mind or no.

Demons on this show have demonstrated they do have standards and work/professional ethic(s) [see Crowley’s thoughts on honoring deals, contracts, whatnots], but let us not confuse this with holding on to their personal morality from when they were human. 

Remember - Dean is a free agent. He is not a minion of the King of Hell, he’s just kinda hanging out with Crowley, no loyalty/obligation there [see above, RE: Lester situation, Dean couldn’t care less about any deal parameters, which Crowley scolds him about later]. Sure, Crowley’s funneling kills Dean’s way, but are any of us under the impression Dean couldn’t get those for himself, as needed? [Spoiler: He can go get what he wants/needs, and he’s *said so*]

My hot take: This Lester kill is primarily about convenience, versus taking a stand against hypocrisy, and especially not misogyny, the latter of which smacks of “looking for something in ___ because it is meaningful to you”.

Let’s get this outta the way super fast, so nobody has to go a-diggin’, just sticking it in for easy-peasy purposes - here’s the definition of “ethics”:

So this can splinter off into subgroups, like religion [”Christian ethics”] and professions [”medical ethics”], etc, etc, etc. Things like what you hear called “rules of engagement” can fall under this umbrella, too. You know, how great care should be taken not to level hospitals and kindergartens, how opposing sides in a conflict should treat POWs humanely, those things. There are sometimes legal overlaps [read: consequences for violations] with ethics but not always.

And just like in the show, we’ve all heard about people who were the best, kindest, talented, most enjoyable folks in the world, only to learn they engaged in what we may perceive as wholly immoral, despicable, gasp-worthy behavior in their personal life. An example from recent past might be the Joss Whedon situation. ::sigh::: So very much disappoint here.

I say all that to say: in real life, the presumption that a person’s ethics transfer to all areas of their life is naive at best, dangerous at worst.

On to your point with Anne Marie - agreed. We’ll get to the entire context of the Lester scene in a sec. And here we go again, with that hill I’m gonna die on, The Sweetheart Situation, which includes both Dean and Demon!Dean. For this, let us stick to Demon!Deanbehavior, as that’s our topic, specifically as related to women. 

But on a brief, though related, aside - Anne Marie could work for NashHole, Inc.:

ANNE-MARIE - Love you, Crowley.CROWLEY - Love you more… sweetheart.ANNE-MARIE - Anne-Marie… jackass.

She gets it.

———————————-

10 x 1 scenes/dialogue [all bold are mine]: 

Convo not long after finding them in his bed……

CROWLEY - Girl seemed nice. Slightly damaged. I could see the old you falling for that.DEAN - Yeah, well, not to worry. She means nothing.

———————————-

Dean sees dude - who she’s apparently mentioned to him - messing with her…

Convo later……

DEAN - Let’s go somewhere, you and me.ANNE-MARIE - We are somewhere.DEAN - No. Somewhere else.ANNE-MARIE - Sweetie… We barely know each other. And you’re drunk.DEAN - Yeah, but, uh… I- I protected your honor, didn’t I?ANNE-MARIE - Yeah. I thought so, too. Seeing you take on Matt, I was like, wow, no one’s ever done that for me before. But then you kept going and going, and I realized whatever is going on with you has nothing to do with my “honor” at all.DEAN - Hm. You got all that from a bar fight? Wow. You’re good.ANNE-MARIE - I wait tables at a roadhouse. I meet the bad guys. I meet the good guys. And maybe for a second there, I thought you were a good guy playing bad. I don’t know. It doesn’t matter. Maybe you’re just—

I have to add here a comment - in its entirety - that I saw about this scene. I’m not attributing because (a) I didn’t note it, so don’t remember, and (b) I legit don’t want to hurt feelings when I say this is such the piss-poor assessment:

“i love this moment. i mean, we’re supposed to hate this moment, because dean is being an insensitive dick, but i think it tells us a lot, not just about demon!dean, but also dean himself. dean’s always slept around and been something of a lady’s man, but we’ve never seen him like this. he’s always been respectful, loving even, in many cases. but you strip away dean’s humanity and he doesn’t see it that way. he can’t see the good in his own actions. dean’s always been one for self hatred, but who knew making him a demon would actually make that worse?”

What, and I mean this deeply, the hell? This is plain as can be. 

He’s just stating the truth. There is nothing in his mannerisms or tone that indicates that he doesn’t see himself in exactly this light, and he’s not being weepy about it. Sure, “real” Dean might, could make a case for that with various show moments/dialogue of self-loathing. But this dude ain’t looking for “the good in his own actions”, c’mon, now.  

This isn’t some shmoopy, deep-seated, introspective scene. I have it somewhere in my files, can’t hit you with a source right this second, but when I was collecting things for the “gold star” list of characteristics I couldn’t ignore for the Dean in my story was a quote from Jensen, speaking of Demon!Dean [and I’m paraphrasing], saying that the scariest thing about him isn’t that he cares about being evil/being a demon/whatever, it’s that he cares about nothing. He is free of any remorse Dean possesses [at *this* point, but that’s another post].

So one more time: Demon!Dean embraces it and gives zero fucks. 

Dean is wanting to leave because Crowley had informed him prior that he was more than ready to move on, and oh - PS - he’s led Sam right to them.

Dean wanted Anne Marie to come with him, essentially running away from Crowley [and the likely forthcoming shit-storm dealing with Sam], because they’ve had, and I quote, “good sex”. Why would he want to bother to find anyone else to put up with his impressive array of fuckery when he’s got a primo bang right in front of him? Sorry, sorry - primo skank?

Again: convenience.

———————————-

Let’s wind things down with 10 x 2…..

DANCER - No touching. House rules.

DEAN - You sure about that? [pulls a $20 bill out of his wallet, lays it on the stage] Go ahead…..

……Pick it up.DANCER - And we’re done.DEAN - Hey, hey, hey. Song’s not over, sweetheart. [grabs her]SECURITY - Time to go, jerkwad.

[DEAN beats the SECURITY guard unconscious, kicks him for good measure, finishes his drink, and picks his $20 bill up from the stage]

 King of respecting women, ladies and gents.

———————————-

And last but not least, backing up, how’s about we get some Lester context, eh?

DEAN - Les… I’m gonna say something to you. I need you to really listen to me. You’re a loser. Your lady in there – she’s a North Dakota 8. You’re a 4 ½, max. Now, I don’t blame her for stepping out – especially if she found you were messing around first.LESTER - No. Oh, no. I-I wasn’t…Uh – How do you know?DEAN - Well, you just got that, uh, pervy, “I’d do anything to nail my secretary” look.LESTER - Oh. No. T-that – it’s different when guys do it.DEAN - Really?LESTER - Yeah. It’s called “science”.DEAN - Oh.LESTER - Men aren’t built for monogamy…because of evolution. We’re – we’re – we’re programmed, you know, to –to spread our seed.[DEAN punches him]LESTER - Ohh! Ow!DEAN - Like I said – loser, with a capital “L,” rhymes with “you suck.”LESTER - Yeah, well, you’re a punk-ass demon! And you work for me now. So get in there and do your job, you freak!DEAN - [glares] And what are you gonna do? You gonna watch, huh? Is that what you like to do, Lester? Watch? Well, watch this. [boop]

The boop was mine. He knifes him. Because Lester was an insulting dick…..…..to Dean. He punched Lester out of annoyance, because he’d showed up for the murder, which Dean found idiotic, as well as just being a loser in general.

If he’d wanted him dead because woo!feminism, he’d have done it after that “Oh” or in place of the punch. 

Any way we slice Dean’s various incarnations - demon, purgatory, MoC - and who he’s dealt with - Steins, angels, Dick Roman, Cole, pick a given situation/topic - he doesn’t suffer douchebags kindly. Sometimes they get a LOOK, sometimes they get a beat-down, sometimes they get snark, sometimes they get insulted, and moments of douchebaggery from friends/family ain’t exempted.

And folks, that’s okay. That’s fine. I dunno about you, but I like my characters layered and screwed up and awesome and tough and vulnerable - I’m a selfish gal. We can still adore the package while taking issue with the parts. It’s how we get redemptive moments, can’t have one without the other. 

Oh, and a not-demon-Dean for the road, believe I mentioned it above - from the episode about Horseman Famine, 5x14:

CASTIEL - […] What I don’t understand is…where is your hunger, Dean?DEAN - Huh?CASTIEL - Well, slowly but surely, everyone in this town is falling prey to Famine, but so far, you seem unaffected.DEAN - Hey, when I want to drink, I drink…..

…..Same goes for a sandwich or a fight.CASTIEL - So… you’re saying you’re just well-adjusted?DEAN - God, no. I’m just well-fed.

.

So sayeth the Nash…. so sayeth the Dean…. so say we all.

[mwolf0epsilon]

League of Legends - Rakan’s Big Day

Summary: Vastaya magic and Fae magic do not mix well, as Xayah and Rakan soon find out when the charmer is hit by one of Lulu’s most powerful spells during a match.

[Inspired by @tinypancakes super amazing and cute Giant Rakan fanart! I’ve always had a thing for making my favourite characters BIG so having one of the best champs of all time turn into a giant lovebird? That’s right up my alley!]

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      Xayah had trouble understanding Yordles. A simple enough concept right? She didn't get gist of then,  their overly friendly and sociable nature, their quirky personalities, their overall nauseating cuteness.

It made no sense to her how this species had not died out while the Vastaya were under threat.

Human favoritism was just...Beyond reasonable comprehension.

Regardless of all this, they still beat faeries. Nothing was more annoying than the Fair Folk.

    As it turned out, the world had a very very bad sense of humor when it came down to it, so Xayah was met with her worst nightmare in terms of complete and utter annoyance.

A Yordle that associated herself with faeries.

    Lulu was perhaps the biggest pest Xayah had ever met.

Her bubbly happy-go-lucky personality.

Her love of small furry creatures and cupcakes.

Her love for turning people into small furry creatures and cupcakes...It was endless, how sickeningly cheery she was! But nothing was worse than how Rakan saw the little misfit…

For, unlike Xayah, Rakan had no problem with Yordles. Found them entertaining even! And Lulu? He was actually friends with Lulu!

Which meant Xayah was forced to deal with her on a regular basis!

It was torture!

Of course Rakan didn't get that.

    Yordles, faeries...Gods above! Xayah hated them all! Especially their brand of magic!

Yordles were far too simplistic, incapable of seeing true potential like human mages, while faeries were too wild, too unpredictable. Unstable.

She wouldn't trust them as far as she could throw them…

So when she and Rakan were assigned to go on a match with Lulu and two other bland misfits, Xayah didn't think much other than about how glad she was that the Yordle wouldn't be in her peripherals for more than ten minutes.

And then, just as things usually tended to go sour, during a team fight to push the Middle Lane, Lulu had cast her Ultimate, intent on boosting their Top Laner, when Rakan got in the way unexpectedly…

    Xayah was currently standing under the shade that her now gigantic mate cast upon her and the Elder Summoner that had come to figure out a way to reverse the damage done. Even with the hood covering most of his face he seemed stumped.

 “I’m sorry you two, but there really isn’t anything I can do here.” he said, one hand resting idly at his hip while the other rubbed under his fuzzy chin. “Fae magic is a tricky type of sorcery.”

 “That would be because fae are malevolent tricksters.” the female Vastayan retorted sourly. Humans were so clueless sometimes...Of course fae magic would be hard for them to comprehend!

 “Well, I’m not really complaining. I’m really digging the view!” Xayah had to crane her neck upwards to look at Rakan’s face. His expression was one of complete glee, not at all bothered by his current predicament. “Not to mention how cute you’re looking babe.”

    The rebel glared up at her counterpart, ears lowering as a sign of great displeasure at the choice of words.

Cute?

Her?

Never!

If anything she was a badass, badasses were not cute!

 “Aaaand there’s that pout I like. Looks waaaay more adorable now that you’re so tiny~” Rakan was enjoying this far too much, she did not like it at all.

 “I’m not the one who’s small Rakan.” she reminded bitterly as the male vastayan leaned in to get a better look at her. She could feel her feathers standing slightly when his face got close enough that his breathing was actually noticeable.

Hard not to take something of the sort into account when you were being blasted by warmth. “Urgh! Your breath smells horrible!”

    Her partner raised an eyebrow at her, before backing off a bit to check. He apologized when he realized he smelled faintly of Honeyfruits.

They tasted amazingly but they smelled fairly bad to be honest.

 “Well, I see you have this under control miss Xayah.” the Elder Summoner said as he turned to leave “I’ll leave you in charge of keeping Rakan under your care until this issue resolves itself.”

 “What? No! You can’t just leave! You’re supposed to know how to fix this!” the rebel exclaimed, trying to follow the man only to pause when he raised a hand to stop her.

 “I really am sorry Xayah, but Fae magic is just...unpredictable. Wild Growth isn’t a permanent spell, I do assure you...But as you know, the Vastaya produce their own natural magic. Rakan’s body is simply boosting the spell on its own. Eventually the effects will just fade.” and with that said the summoner walked away without another word.

Xayah was alone in dealing with this mess.

How she despised Lulu and her rotten trickery!

 “Is this...Really bothering you that much?”

    Xayah turned around at the sound of Rakan’s uncertainty. She was met with a furrowed brow and lowered ears.

Rakan looked to be a bit less relaxed now, his eyes full of worry and a little sadness.

It occurred to the female vastayan that perhaps she’d given her mate the wrong impression.

 “Oh honey...No it’s not. It’s not that it’s...Yes.” she sighed, looking down at her feet before scratching the back of her neck. “But it’s not because of you.”

 “Then...What is it about?” Rakan asked, once again leaning closer so as to make proper eye contact. It looked a bit weird when he had to practically lay down to do it.

Without hesitation, Xayah walked closer so as to touch his cheek, feeling a little bit of surprise at how warm he felt. She chalked it up as a side effect of being a giant.

 “I just don’t trust fae magic. I don’t want you to get hurt because that little yordle witch wasn’t careful with her stupid stick.” she confessed.

 “Awww you worry about me! That’s so sweet!” It was odd how she could feel his muscles move as he spoke, as well as the reverberating of his voice against her hand, but it didn’t feel too bad.

She shook her head at her mate and suppressed a smile.

 “Of course I care. You always get yourself into trouble.” Most of which she helps getting him into, which to be honest Rakan never really seems to mind. Some of his acts of mischief however, she has nothing to do with. Like when he tried to steal chocolate on that ridiculous human festival, the one with the cards full of poems and heart shapes.

Needless to say that day had not gone well for him. Yordles could apparently be vicious if you tried to steal sweets from them.

 “I live on the wild side. Keeping out of harm's way is just so dull!” He was grinning, she could count each individual slightly sharp tooth from her position.

Anyone else would have found that intimidating.

Xayah did not. She trusted Rakan to not go too overboard with his current condition.

 “Very true.” she agreed, sitting down besides his face. “However I wouldn’t really recommend dancing or running around in your current size. You’d probably cause a bit of trouble.”

 “Ah...But that means I have to sit around all day until I’m normal sized again!” Rakan looked absolutely horrified at the thought of this.

 “I’m sorry baby, but I don’t want you getting kicked out for destroying the Institute of War. I’d miss you if that happened.” She patted him on the nose which, in hindsight, she should have realised was a mistake.

    Rakan seemed to have a reply ready but he paused, eyes widening and ears falling flat against his skull before he scrunched up his face. The female rebel looked up in alarm, worried for a second that something was wrong before realising what was coming.

She backed up quickly but failed to give herself and Rakan space before he loudly sneezed, the burst of air sending her flying through the garden towards the path that lead back towards the main buildings.

Xayah let out an undignifying screech as she felt her body flip about in the air, before she collided with a much softer surface than the cobbled steps she’d been headed for.

After taking a few breaths and sitting up, she found herself sitting on the palm of her mate’s hand.

In the charmer’s defense, he looked adorably sheepish.

 “Sorry! Sorry!” Xayah realized he must have thrown himself abruptly to catch her “Sensitive nose.”

She blinked owlishly at him, feathers all standing on edge as she recovered from the rush of adrenaline. That could have ended poorly had Rakan not reacted immediately.

 “Note to self, no booping your nose…”

 The abnormally larger male smiled before laughing, raising her up so that he could hold her close to his face.

He seemed to be inspecting her before slowly nuzzling his face against her body in a display of affection.

The relief in Rakan’s eyes was evident, she imagined the sight of her ragdolling through the air might have been quite a bit of a fright for him.

 “Lets not go for any more improvised flying lessons.” she leaned into the warmness of his face. His feathers felt very fluffy, more so than usual.

 “Yeah...Unless I’m there to catch you.” The charmer agreed, content with nuzzling his mate. He definitely enjoyed being able to hold her it seemed.

 “You’d catch me every time I fell wouldn’t you?”

 “Always.”