#i need to make sheets for them or something

[cosmos-kitty]

Do you have any tips for painting with gouache? like how do you get it to stay a nice solid color over a large swath of paper? and how do you blend it so seamlessly?

Of course, here's a few pointers off the top of my head:

1. I've used gouache for this in the past so it's possible, but the flat backdrop on my latest WIP is actually acrylic! A nifty thing I've found about putting a layer of acrylic down, is that it creates a barrier once dried and essentially makes the paper waterproof. This means you can work in gouache on top without it mixing with the background, and you can wet a section and completely wipe it clean with a cloth/tissue and it won't disturb the acrylic layer underneath. It also makes the paper more resilient, and you don't get as much pilling/tearing from the moisture

To get an even wash it's mostly getting the right consistency, I add just a little water - enough that the paint is less "tacky" as you drag your brush along paper, but not so much that it's runny or translucent. It takes a couple of attempts sometimes!

2. Also for the current WIP that I posted earlier, like the vast majority of my traditional pieces, keep in mind that it's mixed media. So I assume you're referring to the blue-green gradient on the bird and wondering how I got the gouache to blend like that - it's actually colouring pencils! I'll often switch between dry and wet media, even layer them back and forth, whatever makes the most sense to get the effect I want 😁

3. On that note, when you're working with paint, or any medium really, I can't recommend enough having a "test" sheet that you do both before and during a traditional piece. It allows you try out different medium combos, see what shade your gouache will dry into, and catch any issues before it ends up on your artwork. I often see artists being encouraged to just Bob Ross their way through a piece, the idea being that you'll just have happy little accidents that you'll naturally work into the piece - maybe, but you'll also possibly irreversibly wreck your hard work and have to start again. I don't know, I'm just a methodical person I guess, but seeing someone just directly apply something to the page when they're not sure what it's going to do makes me wince - no two art supplies are the same! All of those paints and pens have different chemical makeups, there's an unlimited number of ways what you're using could interact, good or bad.

Since it's already there, I usually reuse one of the leftover failsons from the process of making the wash background, then test everything on top of that. That way you can see exactly what shade the paint will dry on top of whatever colour the background is:

Doesn't need to look good, nobody sees it (usually) and you can also test the thickness of your brushstrokes while you're at it.

Anyway, I hope this helps!

[cybrasigilism]

Could I request a nsfw fic of soft dom thanos x reader reassuring them because they feel shy during intimacy? (I’m such a sucker for soft doms☹️) btw I love love your work ur one of my favorite writers :3

aww i’m so honoured! thank you so much for the love 😘

Judge Judy (Thanos/Player 230 X Reader)

warning: smut (omg someone sound the alarm bells) | not proofread | lowercase intended | ooc thanos? (writing him a lot softer than i think he would be) | protection not specified (don’t rely on the pullout method pulease) | praise | soft dom!thanos | reader has female genitalia | PiV

character: thanos/choi su-bong (player 230)

A/N: it lowkey felt strange to write thanos super soft n’ sweet? i can get behind a gentler version of him, don’t get me wrong! and thank you so much again for your kind words :) hoping i did your request justice! (+ the title of the fic is taken from a Tyler, the Creator song title, please check it out Judge Judy is really good)

MDNI! 18+ content under the cut, reader’s discretion is advised

─────⁺‧₊˚ ཐི⋆♱⋆ཋྀ ˚₊‧⁺ ─────

you were beyond ashamed of yourself.

here was your boyfriend, putting down his all for you, and you still couldn’t escape your mousey state, still hiding away as much as possible in that shell of yours. even as he had his hand between your thighs, working absolute magic, you couldn’t muster up a moan. you were absolutely horrified of making any noise. sure there was the occasional gasp for air and slight moan but you held back as much as possible; gripping the sheets, biting your lip, anything to stop that voice of yours coming out. you almost slipped up when he started kissing your neck, leaving hickeys anywhere he spent a particularly long time on.

it got to a point where enough was enough for thanos.

he was desperate to hear you, he wanted so badly to draw moans and whines from your lips, but you were positively petrified. before he moved forward to the actual sex part of the ordeal, he pulled away, now looming over you as you laid there, wide eyed and just so quiet.

“what’s the matter, baby?” he asked, looking you up and down. you exhaled sharply, looking away in shame. “i’m sorry, i’m just..nervous, that’s all.” he cocked his head to the side, eyebrows crinkling upwards in a look of concern. “nervous? for what? we’ve done this before..” he had every right to be confused, you knew that. if you could get naked in front of him, why was your voice where you drew the line? “was it something i did?” he wondered, and you felt your heart break into a million pieces.

“no! god no, i just..” you started, feeling your shoulders tense as you found yourself scavenging for words that should have come all too easily to you. “i don’t want to be obnoxious..?” the look of concern on thanos’s face slowly let a smile creep through and he chuckled a bit, you felt your cheeks grow hot with embarrassment. “don’t laugh!” you cry out, covering your face. “i’m sorry! i’m sorry, i just wasn’t expecting that, that’s all.” he explained, calming down. he grabbed your hands, moving them down from your face, able to make eye contact once more.

“be obnoxious all you like,” he started, his gaze had become softer than you’d seen it before, “you don’t understand how badly i need to hear you.” you gulped, grasping his hands in return. “i don’t…i don’t think i know how…” you felt your eyes shift again, you didn’t know how? he took your chin to redirect your line of sight once again. “if that’s all it is, i can help you.” he assured, you felt the tension in your shoulders ease. “just follow my lead, okay sweetheart?” you nodded, leaning forward to initiate a kiss, to which thanos happily accepted.

this time, you weren’t gonna hold back. you were terrified, sure. but you were not gonna hold back.

⁺‧₊˚ ཐི⋆♱⋆ཋྀ ˚₊‧⁺

and hold back you did not. fuck, you didn’t even know you were capable of such sounds. from the moment he thrusted into you, you were more vocal than either of you knew possible. thanos was certainly not disappointed, he had gotten more vocal in response too. you know he had told you to follow his lead, but now it seemed you had taken the role of leader.

“there ya’ go, that’s my girl.” he praised as he bottomed out once again in your tight cunt, maintaining a steady pace as he pumped in and out of you. you couldn’t imagine forming words at this point, he consumed all your thoughts, ridding you of the ability to form intelligible dialogue. “god, you have such pretty moans, fuck.”

his relentless praise caused you to clench around his cock, which made him make sluttier sounds than you, which was currently saying a lot. with your newfound voice, an endless cycle of pure ecstasy laid ahead, and it was better than any drug in that cross that thanos wore.

─────⁺‧₊˚ ཐི⋆♱⋆ཋྀ ˚₊‧⁺ ─────

apologies that this one is shorter than the others, but i felt it was best short and sweet! thanks for reading and for the recommendation! as always, any advice/constructive criticism on how to improve my writing is appreciated and requested!

have a good rest of your day/night lovelies!💋

Tags: @gongyoosgf @kvstjwonnie @pink-apples001 @fiicalapsiholoaga

[uncle-fruity]

I love the new year! It's my favorite holiday, and people who say that nothing changes or resolutions don't work or that everything is bad so there's no point in celebrating miss the point, imo. It's about getting through another year! It's about progressing and surviving and setting intentions for the new year. But too many people think of resolutions and new beginnings as things that have to be Big and Challenging for them to be meaningful, but that's really not how change works.

For the last several years, I've done what I call Resolution Bingo. I think of 24 things that range from Easily Doable to A Challenge and write them out on a bingo sheet. (Free space is always just Stay Alive.) The idea isn't to do all 24, but rather to try to get one or more bingos throughout the year.

I have never actually gotten a bingo (though I've come very close) but it doesn't matter. The point of Resolution Bingo is to put intention out there for the new year. I think of things I want to do or learn or get back into and I put them on my bingo sheet. Because of Resolution Bingo, I've gone to see more live shows than I used to. I've done more art projects & followed through with them. I've visited new places & had new adventures. I've learned new skills in cooking, needlework, and many other areas of interest. I have made both big and small positive steps for my life because of the resolutions I set at the beginning of the year.

So my advice is to think of resolutions as less of a major life change that you want to dive into -- take the stress off. You can make smaller resolutions that help with your bigger goals. I always tell people who decide they also want to do Resolution Bingo that they shouldn't put anything like, "Run daily/weekly," because as soon as you miss a day, it can demotivate you into stopping all together. Or, if you keep it going, you might feel guilty about marking it off on your bingo sheet at the end of the year, even if you still did a lot of work towards the goal. So, usually, I recommend setting realistic goals that get you going. Stuff like "run a 5k" or "run 3 different running trails" or you know... whatever is reasonable for you and has a tangible beginning & end. If you start working towards something fun or rewarding, you will still be doing the running you set out to do. Going for a daily run is good and all, but it's a slog if you don't know what you're working towards or if you don't allow yourself to rest on days that you really need rest.

My resolutions this year include things like getting a piercing, reading 50 academic papers, visiting all the libraries in my city, learning to place all the countries on a world map from memory, learning 3 new recipes, go somewhere new, complete 1 sewing project... Stuff that will take time and energy, but which will improve my life in ways I want to see it improve. If I don't set some goals -- even fun ones like going to a new museum -- I will just forget to do anything exciting or new & get lost in the depressing Grind of Life. And if you're lost in the depressing Grind of Life, remember to get outside and so anything at all that sounds appealing or productive or fun. It really helps to connect with the good things in life; makes you stronger and more stable in the long run.

I'm coming out as a new year's enjoyer. "Oh you will never stick to these goals" "nothing is really different between one day and the next" "why celebrate the bad years" because I want to!!! Because I love endings and beginnings and making lists!! I love the concept of starting the year by partying I love the drama of kissing someone at midnight I love the one time of the year when it is cold I love starting a new calendar and I love cheering for no reason

[gerlionrise]

A Game Within the Game P3

Hwang In-ho (player 001) x reader Synopsis: In-ho heals your wound, tells the truth, and tries to make you completely his own. This is part 3. Part 2 is here.

You woke up in a bed. It was soft, far too soft, and for a moment, you thought you were still dreaming. The room was dimly lit, a warm glow from a single bedside lamp casting long shadows across the luxurious furniture. The sheets were crisp and expensive, the kind you’d only ever seen in catalogues or movies. Your body ached—sharp pain lancing through your side as you tried to sit up. You froze, memories flooding back. The games. The chaos. The sound of the gunshot.

Your breath quickened as panic clawed at your throat. This wasn’t the dorm, wasn’t the arena, and certainly wasn’t anywhere you recognized. Where were you? Were you dead? 

The door creaked open. 

You turned sharply, your muscles protesting the sudden movement. There he was—001. But he looked different. This man stood tall, composed, and sharp, dressed in simple black sweatpants and a fitted T-shirt that highlighted a lean strength you hadn’t noticed before. His face was calm, but his eyes… they were heavier now, like they carried the weight of a thousand secrets. 

“You’re awake,” he said, his voice gentle but unsettlingly firm. He stepped inside, closing the door softly behind him.

“What is this? Where am I?” Your voice came out shaky, trembling with a mixture of fear and confusion. 

“You won,” he replied, walking closer.

His words landed like a punch to the gut. You blinked, your mind scrambling to piece everything together. “What do you mean I won? What happened? Where—where is everyone else?”

“They’re gone,” he said simply, standing at the foot of the bed now. “It’s over. The games are finished.”

Your stomach twisted. “The last thing I remember—there was a mistake. I made a mistake. I should be dead.”

He tilted his head slightly, studying you. “No,” he said quietly. “You shouldn’t.”

“What does that mean?” You sat up fully now, ignoring the sharp protest of your body. “You’re not making any sense.”

He sighed, his calm demeanor slipping for just a moment. He looked almost… tired. “I need you to know something,” he said, more to himself than to you. 

“I need to know what?” Your voice rose, cracking with desperation. 

He hesitated, just for a moment, before meeting your gaze head-on. “My name is Hwang In-ho,” he said, his tone steady. “I’m not just Player 001. I’m the Frontman, the Host of these games, of all of this,” he said pointing his finger around, hinting that we were still in the territory where the games take place.

The words didn’t register at first. They hung in the air, heavy and incomprehensible. “What?” you whispered, shaking your head. “What are you talking about? Are you joking with me?”

“I’m not,” he said, his gaze unwavering. “I’ve been the host of these games for years. I was there before you ever signed up.” 

Your blood ran cold. “This is mad,” you said, your voice trembling. “No, that’s not possible. You were with us. You were in the games. You—”

“I joined the games for you after the first game,” he interrupted, his tone sharp now, cutting through your denial. “You were the reason I entered.”

The room spun around you. “You’re lying,” you said again, but the conviction in your voice was gone. 

“I’m not,” he repeated. “I made sure you survived. Every step of the way, I was there. Guiding you. Protecting you.”

“Protecting me?” you repeated, your voice rising in disbelief. “You killed people! You let them die!”

“It’s my job.” His voice was cold now, his eyes narrowing. “Just like yours was to play the games.” The anger burned through your veins, hot and undeniable. You forced yourself to your feet, ignoring the stabbing pain in your side. Before he could react, you raised your hand and slapped him, hard. The sharp sound echoed through the room, and for a brief moment, his head tilted slightly to the side, his cheek reddening. 

Hwang In-ho didn’t retaliate. He didn’t flinch. He only sighed, meeting your gaze with calm, unshaken patience. 

“You’re a murderer, a fucking psychopath” you spat, your voice trembling with rage. “You lied to me. You used me.”

“I didn’t use you,” he replied evenly, his tone quiet but firm. “You chose this.”

“Chose this?” You laughed bitterly, gesturing wildly at the room, at him. “I didn’t choose to trust a monster! I trusted you. I cried into your shoulder, told you how scared I was, and you—” Your voice cracked as the tears you’d been holding back threatened to spill. “You were the reason for it all.”

“I won’t apologize,” he said, his voice unwavering. 

“You’re unbelievable,” you hissed, stepping back as though the distance could somehow dull the betrayal you felt. 

“I understand why you’re angry,” he said, his posture as calm as always, “And I expected this. I knew you wouldn’t take the truth easily, but I didn’t want to hurt you. That was never my intention.”

“Then what was your intention, In-ho?” you demanded. “Why let me go through all of this? I saw good people, people I liked, get killed!”

“To keep you alive,” he said simply. “To make sure you won.”

You shook your head, disbelief twisting in your chest. “And what now? What happens now? I'm sure I'm here for a reason right now, am I?”

He took a step closer, his voice softening. “I want you to do more than just take your winnings. I want you to stay here.”

You blinked, stunned into silence for a moment. “What?” 

“I want you to become a co-host of these games” he said, his tone steady. “To work with me. To help run the games.”

Your stomach churned. “You want me to help you kill people?”

He didn’t answer immediately. Instead, he stepped even closer, his expression unreadable. “You’ve seen it for yourself,” he said cupping your cheek with his hand. “How people turn on each other. How they’re willing to destroy one another for money. You’ve seen how disgusting humanity can be. You’ve felt it.”

You opened your mouth to argue but faltered. His words hit a nerve. The memories of what you’d witnessed—of the desperation, the betrayal, the violence—flashed in your mind, unbidden. 

“I’m not like you,” you said quietly, moving away from him.

 “No,” his gaze steady. “No, you’re not,” he left something unsaid.

“I didn’t ask for this,” you whispered. 

“But you stayed. You fought. And now, you’ve won.”

You stared at him, your anger faltering as his words sank in. 

“You don’t have to decide now,” he said after a moment, his tone softening again. “You’re hurt. You need time to recover. And while you’re here, you’ll have plenty of time to think. You’ll see for yourself that there’s nothing for you out there.”

“There’s no point in going back?” you said bitterly, repeating his words.

“You know it’s true,” he replied. “You told me that yourself one night — you had nothing. No one. That’s why you joined the games in the first place. Out of boredom, out of hopelessness.” 

You flinched, the truth of his words hitting harder than you wanted to admit. 

“Stay,” he said softly, stepping closer yet again. “Stay, and I’ll show you that you don’t need to go back. You have everything you need here.”

Tears stung your eyes as the weight of his words crushed down on you. “Why?” you choked out. “Why would you do this? Why would you let me go through all of that? Why did you let me live?”

His expression softening. “You remind me of someone,” he said quietly.

You swallowed hard, unsure of what to say. "You’re delusional if you think I’m that person." 

He didn’t say anything to this. 

Finally, you mustered the strength to ask the question that had been burning in your mind. “Why did the guard shоot me? You said you were protecting me. Then why did it happen?”

His expression hardened for a brief moment, but then he sighed. “It doesn’t matter now,” he said. “It’s been handled. Now rest,” he turned around to leave the room

You stared at him leaving, a storm of emotions swirling inside you. The room was silent, heavy with everything left unsaid.

—

For the next two days, you didn’t see Hwang In-ho at all. The only people you encountered were the silent guards in their oppressive pink uniforms, coming in at scheduled intervals to check on your recovery or patch you up when necessary. Each time they entered the room, you felt a wave of panic, memories of the last game rushing back—how one of them had pointed a gun at you and shot. 

You tried asking them questions, trying to understand what their purpose was, why they were here, and how they could participate in something so monstrous. But their silence was infuriating. They didn’t answer, didn’t even acknowledge your words. It was as though you were speaking to statues. 

In the meantime, you explored the space where you were being kept. It looked like an apartment, sprawling yet suffocating, with no windows. The walls were sleek and minimalist, the furnishings modern and expensive. It felt more like a gilded cage than a refuge.

Every day, fresh clothes were brought to you. You could tell they were expensive, tailored to your size and style, but you didn’t care for most of them. You stuck to a simple outfit: black shorts that hugged your legs comfortably and a matching black V-neck top. It was practical and unassuming, the only semblance of normalcy in this surreal situation.

You asked the guards repeatedly where In-ho was. “Where is your host? Where is he hiding?” you’d say. The only response you got was the vague assurance that he had “things to do.”  

“Things to do? For days?” you muttered angrily, frustrated by their cryptic responses and his absence. You couldn’t understand why he would leave you alone here.

---

On the third day after you had been shot, you found yourself in the kitchen. It was like the rest of the apartment—sleek black counters, matte surfaces, and every kind of appliance imaginable. You busied yourself by rummaging through the cabinets, not because you were hungry, but because it gave you something to do. 

Then, the door opened, and In-ho walked in. 

He was dressed casually, in black slacks and a fitted black shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. His presence filled the room instantly, his calm yet commanding energy unsettling you. He glanced at you briefly before walking to the counter. 

“Where have you been?” you asked, your voice sharper than intended. 

“I was finishing up the games,” he replied without emotion, opening the refrigerator to pull out a bottle.

“Getting rid of the bodies?” you shot back, narrowing your eyes.

He didn’t answer. Instead, he busied himself preparing a drink, the soft clink of ice breaking the tension in the air. You could feel his quiet disapproval of your tone, but it only fueled your frustration. 

You hopped onto the countertop, as you watched him. If he wanted to act nonchalant, you would make it harder for him. 

“How did you become the host?” you asked, tilting your head. “Do you enjoy this? Watching people die for your amusement?” 

His answers were dry, measured. “I have my reasons,” he said simply. “It’s necessary.”

“So, what do you do when you're not running murder games? Read? Knit? Take long walks around your crime scenes?" 

"I manage... everything. It’s not all death and drama, you know."

"Oh, sure. Just a side hustle of ruining lives." 

He smiled a little and glanced at you, “You’re quite good at sarcasm." 

You didn't answer him and continued your interrogation. "Why black? Is it just your vibe, or are you secretly colorblind?"

"Black is practical. It hides blood,” he replied by taking the ice out of the mold.

"Romantic. You ever think of wearing pink? Really lean into the theme here."

Now he chuckled, “I think I’ll leave pink to the guards."

Finally you asked, “When can I go home?” 

He glanced up at you briefly before returning to his drink. “When you’re ready.”

"What do you even want from me? Besides… whatever this ‘partner’ thing is."

His gaze flickered to you again, lingering this time. You noticed the way his eyes traveled down, taking in your posture, the curve of your body in the simple outfit you had chosen. There was something unreadable in his expression—calculated, yet almost… appreciative. 

"I want you to see what I see. To understand why I did this."

Then, he moved toward you, closing the space between you both in a few deliberate steps. 

You blinked in confusion as he stopped directly in front of you, standing between your legs. Even like this, with you perched on the counter, he was taller. His presence was overwhelming, his proximity setting your nerves on edge. 

“What are you doing?” you asked, your voice faltering slightly.

He reached past you, his hand brushing lightly against your arm as he opened the cupboard behind you. “I need a glass,” he said smoothly, his voice low.

You leaned forward instinctively so he could open the cabinet behind you. For a brief moment, you were pressed closer to him, your breath catching as you realized how little distance was left between you. 

He stepped back after retrieving the glass, returning to his drink as if nothing had happened. You watched him carefully, your heart still racing. There was something about the way he moved, so deliberate and composed, that both irritated and intrigued you. 

When he finally finished, he turned back to you. “Have you decided?” he asked.

“Decided what?”

“Whether you’ll stay with me. Whether you’ll join me.”

Your laugh was bitter, humorless. “You already know my answer. I’ll not join you. And as soon as I can, I’m going home.”

Something flickered across his face—disappointment, perhaps, but it was gone too quickly to read. He nodded once, setting his drink down on the counter. 

Then, before you could react, he came up to you again and placed his hands on your waist, lifting you off the counter with surprising ease. You tensed, ready to protest, but his grip was steady, grounding. 

“I want to show you something,” he said softly, his voice almost gentle and his dark eyes catching yours. You tried not to stare, tried not to acknowledge how ridiculously good he looked in his perfectly tailored black shirt, sleeves rolled up just enough to reveal his forearms.  

You hesitated. There was no reason to trust him, no reason to believe this wasn’t another one of his manipulations. But there was something in his tone, something that made you curious despite yourself. 

“Fine,” you said finally, your voice laced with defiance. “But this better not be another one of your twisted games.”

He smirked faintly, a shadow of amusement crossing his face. “I think you’ll want to see this.” But before leaving he asked, “How’s your wound?” voice low, steady, but there was an edge of genuine curiosity.  

“It’s fine,” you said quickly, a little too quickly. “Why do you care?”  

“I didn’t want you to get hurt,” he replied simply, his words cutting through the air. 

You shrugged, trying to seem unaffected, but your body betrayed you. The memory of that gunshot, the panic, the pain—it all came rushing back in flashes. “I said it’s fine.”  

He didn’t believe you. His gaze dropped to your side, where the faint outline of the bandage peeked out from beneath your fitted black top. Without asking, he reached out, his fingers brushing just above the wound, careful but deliberate.  

You flinched, not from pain but from the sheer heat of his touch. It wasn’t fair—how could someone so infuriating have hands that felt this warm, this careful?  

“You’re a terrible liar,” he murmured, his lips quirking into the faintest hint of a smirk.  

“Yeah, well, you’re a terrible human being,” you shot back.

With that, he guided you toward the door, his hand resting lightly on your back as you walked. For better or worse, you were about to find out what he had planned.

PART 4 is gonna be loooong and very good. Buckle up and be ready!

tag list: @carrotjuicepdf @wwastro @lucinda-reads @mysteriouslydeafeningwerewolf @kripr2 @raideyo @kushnovice @ft-winnow @grliealibi @r3va-dwme @fantasylovestoryme Want to get tagged in the next part? Drop a comment.

[beloveds-embrace]

I kind of need to see their reaction to the duchess mother insulting her-

I got this ask the same day I posted this, so I’m pretty it’s related to that 🙂‍↕️

The air in the hall outside your bedroom is heavy, suffocating. The door is cracked open just enough for voices to slip through, sharp and cutting, each word a dagger that buries itself deeper into your heart.

You’re curled in bed, the sheets twisted around you, your body frail and trembling under their weight. The room is dim, the curtains drawn to keep out the light, but it does nothing to hide the wreckage of your state- the unkempt hair, the tear-stained pillows, the hollow look in your eyes that even you can feel without needing to see.

And your mother doesn’t care.

“Look at you,” she snaps, her heels clicking against the hardwood floor as she paces. “Lying there like some pathetic, sniveling child. Is this what you’ve let yourself become? No wonder your husband doesn’t want you. Who in their right mind would?”

John freezes just outside the door. His breath catches, his hands curling into tight fists at his sides. Behind him, Simon, Johnny, and Kyle stop, their footsteps abruptly halting as they catch the sound of her voice.

Inside, you don’t answer. You can’t. Your throat feels raw from crying earlier, and the effort of defending yourself seems insurmountable.

“Do you know how humiliating this is for me?” Your mother’s voice rises, sharp and unforgiving, a screeching banshee. “To have my daughter- a duchess, no less- reduced to this? Half-dead and wallowing in her own misery? I didn’t raise you to be this weak.”

Simon’s jaw tightens, the muscle in his cheek twitching as he stares at the sliver of light of the moon spilling from your door. His breathing is slow, measured, but his fingers twitch at his sides, itching to do something, anything to stop this.

Johnny’s expression twists, his lips parting as though he’s about to say something- to barge in, to end it- but Kyle’s hand on his shoulder stops him. Kyle doesn’t look at him, though. He can’t tear his eyes away from the shadow of your mother pacing inside the room, his knuckles tight where they grip the edge of his coat.

Your mother keeps going, undeterred by your silence.

“It’s no wonder no one comes to you,” she spits. “Why would they? Look at yourself. Wasting away like this. No dignity. No pride. How do you expect anyone to love you if you can’t even bother to act like someone worth loving?”

The words hit harder than any slap, and the quiet, broken sound you make in response has Johnny stepping forward before he can stop himself. Kyle yanks him back, his grip iron-tight, but Johnny’s trembling, his whole body thrumming with the need to move- to pull her out of there, to make her stop.

John says nothing, but his silence is louder than any outburst. He stands rigid, shoulders squared, eyes dark and unreadable as he stares through the crack in the door.

Inside, you flinch as your mother’s heels come to a stop beside the bed.

“Pathetic,” she says again, quieter this time but no less digging. “You should be grateful he hasn’t thrown you out yet. Maybe he should have. Maybe then you’d finally pull yourself together.”

Kyle’s grip falters, and Johnny’s nails dig into his palms.

Simon exhales slowly, the sound sharp and dangerous.

And John- John turns and walks away, his footsteps heavy against the marble floors. He doesn’t say a word, doesn’t look at the others as he passes. But the set of his shoulders, the tension in his spine, says enough.

He’s going to fix this. He needs to fix this.

Even if it’s far too late to undo what’s already been done.

The others linger for only a moment longer, torn between the urge to barge in and the weight of their own guilt keeping them rooted to the spot. Eventually, though, they follow John, leaving you alone with your mother’s words echoing in the suffocating silence.

And you?

You curl deeper into the bed, pulling the blankets over your head as if that might be enough to drown it all out.

It’s not.

[witherby]

What would happen if any if the batfamilys enemies kidnapped baby y/n and ended up hurting them badly?

I'm happy to tell you, but not in any fantastic detail. When you say "baby" I think "infant, no teeth, still in diapers, etc."

Content warning for bruises on an infant

--

The contexts in which you would not be with a family member as an infant are very few and far between. I'm thinking a couple of your brothers have you on an outing, like a soiree or a networking lunch for Wayne Enterprises, where they have to put the masks away and act like civilians. There's lots of people around, their attention spans are divided, and they're also counting down the minutes until it's socially acceptable to leave.

When that time finally hits, Dick politely excuses himself and goes to collect you and Tim so they can head home. But he only finds Tim.

And Tim turns and only sees Dick.

"I thought you were watching them," Tim says, immediately turning sheet white. Dick's complexion is the same.

"I thought you were watching them."

Cue the immediate panic. Tim has his phone out and is trying to pinpoint your location via the tracker they put in all your pacifiers. Dick's eyes are sweeping the area for any signs of you having either crawled away or gotten scooped up by some confused and well-meaning socialite.

You are far away, and getting farther. Someone definitely took you on purpose. They don't hesitate before leaving the gathering and radioing backup. They'll handle all the screaming and scolding from everyone else as long as you get back home safe.

Whoever did take you, be it someone from the usual rogues gallery or a rando that likes kidnapping kids, it doesn't take long for them to catch up to him. It also doesn't take long to do any damage, either, so when they do find you, it's unfortunately with some significant bruising. Your chubby cheeks are red from tears and your arms and waist have handprint bruising from being dragged around, but nothing is broken or bleeding.

Your brothers can't say the same for the one that had the balls kidnap you. He should be thankful Jason was already on another mission.

(Jason comes back and pays him a visit anyway. Nobody gets to lay a fucking finger on you.)

In the aftermath, you're almost overwhelmed by the attention. You don't sleep in your nursery alone again for months; either someone is in there with you, or you're simply relocated to one of their bedrooms for the night. You're handled so, so delicately, like you're made of porcelain. It's all very soft play and quiet voices for a couple days. If you flinch at contact, either due to the trauma of the kidnapping or because someone brushed against a bruise that's still healing, there will be tears shed from that person.

Bruce notices you flinch when he burps you after a feeding and he has to sit on the floor with you in his lap because his hands are shaking so badly.

Damian will not touch you directly at all. If you need to be picked up, he's fashioning a hammock to slowly and gently roll you into and then carry you off.

Alfred maintains the calmest facade when he carries you around, but if you make any kind of whine or pained face, he has to take a moment alone to recollect himself.

Dick and Tim can barely stand to look at you. They're overwhelmed with guilt for assuming the other person was watching you and not simply double-checking themselves.

Jason asks Tim if he can do some tummy time with you, and he just straight up shakes his head.

Dick fucks up his sleep schedule keeping an eye on you in the night, because even though Dr. Thompkins cleared you, what if she missed something and you develop a complication and need help? He doesn't patrol Blüdhaven properly for weeks, instead coming over to Gotham to keep vigil at your window.

Needless to say, the general public does not see you again for months, and when they do, you are with the entire family. They will not let that happen again.

[peppermintprism]

Hello fellow ADHDer, may I interest you in some management tools?

Option 1: goblin.tools the AI tool that breaks down tasks for you. (Note: if you don’t want to use AI, you can skip to Option 2)

You can delete sub-tasks that don’t apply to you, or click the 🪄 icon to break down sub-tasks further. I often find that I’m not overwhelmed by the number of steps, but instead by trying to hold all those tiny steps in my glitchy working memory.

Option 2: Domestic Labor & Dragons. This strategy originated on TikTok, and most citations trails lead back to @this.isjules but I was unable to find the original video. Here’s my version of it:

1. On a day when you have a brain cell, make a list of the chores in your house by room or section. Number each item, try to make your list lengths correspond to standard dice numbers so that you can roll on them as tables later. Your options are: 2, 4, 6, 8, 10, 12, and 20. 🎲

3. Assign point values to each chore. The number of points doesn’t matter, but I like using 5pts for easier tasks, 10pts and 15pts for medium tasks, and 20pts for especially hard tasks. I made two lists for some unintelligible reason. You can just put the points on the same page, just like write them in another pen color or something.

4. Make your monster. Draw it badly. Use a randomizer website or pull from the monster manual if you want, just don’t get too precious with it, the monster’s purpose is to be defeated and we’re gonna scribble on it. If you want to do a big cleaning day, tally up your total possible points for doing every chore in your house, then divide that by two. (For me, all chores add up to 400pts so I make most of my Big Monsters 200pts)

5. FIGHT! Most of the time I really only end up needing to use the Roll for Chores sheet and the dice, but it’s really fun to scribble on the monster as they take damage and your house gets cleaner. You can optionally assign some reward for defeating the monster, but I just like the dopamine hit of defeating my Blorbo. Mine reset to baby mode upon defeat as seen with Bitey above. Final note: if you refill the same chore twice, take a break!! Get food!! The people who tell you to never stop moving are on their way to burnout!!! You can get momentum again by rolling the dice “just to see” what the next chore would be.

More options: Body Double with a friend, Roleplay that you’re Cinderella or your favorite character, put on a dance music album and only clean until the music stops, invite a friend over to have a reason to make your space clean when they arrive, put on videos of professional cleaners helping people get their space in order, hide shelf-stable snacks at the bottom of piles of clutter and only eat them once you’ve reached the bottom of that pile. Do whatever works! Throw shame out the window! If it works for you it’s not dumb!

(Note: this acronym is also sometimes called INCUP or FOCUS. I just like PINCH best.)

Good luck out there, friends! Now I have to go do the cleaning that I procrastinated by making this post. 😅

Sincerely,

A fellow ADHDer ♾️🦋

Clean home checklist:

"Do the laundry" as if doing laundry doesn't have 27 individual steps that each require other tasks to get done. Each task runs the risk of starting additional secret tasks.

"Organize kitchen" my brain has malware and it's overheating. CPU at 100%. There are no executives at my function

[macgyvermedical]

Okay, this is not about writing. I want to learn basic first aid and how to assemble a first aid kit. I plan to search for some courses too, but I’d like a clear idea before diving in. I’d love to hear your advice on it. Always grateful for your blog— it’s such a valuable resource.

Hi!

First aid kits contain things that would be handy to have for an illness or injury you didn't forsee happening.

Store-bought first aid kits have gotten a little better than they were when I bought my first one in 2015, but they're still a complete crapshoot. Most of them contain the least adhesive bandages known to man, a pair of plastic tweezers, a single packet of gauze, two each of acetaminophen and ibuprofen, and if you're extra lucky, some plastic medical tape.

Which is great for: papercuts in fingers that don't sweat ever, cleaning tiny scrapes that don't need bandages, the perfect size of partially embedded splinters, and one (1) single headache. Maybe.

My advice: make your own.

The following are 2 options for lists of supplies:

The Basic Kit:

3-4 pairs of nitrile gloves that will fit over your sweaty, hand-sanitizer-covered hands (mediums if your hands are really tiny, otherwise larges)

1-2 disposable masks for if you get sick unexpectedly

Your favorite adhesive bandages (at least 20, in different sizes including extra large)

A breathing barrier for CPR

A zipper plastic bag

A small container of hand sanitizer

A small container of petroleum jelly

A small tube of hydrocortisone cream

Metal tweezers (and a few alcohol wipes to clean them)

Like 4 of whatever hard candy you hate the most (or 4-8 glucose tablets)

One of those fold-up pill containers containing at least 10 each of: acetaminophen, ibuprofen, 81mg aspirin, diphenhydramine, your favorite non-drowsy antihistamine, and loperamide (Label these. You're not gonna remember which is which. Promise.)

A few each of all the medications you take, just in case you forget them (especially emergency medications)

The Adventure Kit:

Everything in the Basic Kit, plus:

Like as many packets as you can fit of 4x4 sterile gauze

A way to clean water (purification tablets take up the least space)

More of your own medications

More zipper bags

Silk medical tape

Scissors

A bandanna or other medium-large square of fabric

3-4 of your least favorite high-calorie food bars

A waterproof sheet ("space blankets" are small and great at being waterproof, if nothing else (Though I do have a personal vendetta against space blankets. Ask me why sometime))

An elastic bandage

A fold-up splint if you're gonna be in an area that doesn't have sticks laying all over the ground

As for how to use this stuff- get a few friends together and get in touch with me. We can set something up via zoom.

[loveandleases]

Happy New Year, Lea!🎉

A bit late for the Chris Suffering™️ hours request, but I hope Chris had the New Year's they deserve 😇😈

Like feeling alone in a sea of people at the Clarke family party thinking about all the plans for the next year they ruined. Or making excuses to stay late at the office, looking at their old photos & videos of MC or lurking MC's socials envious of the fun time they're having 😘💩

Happy New Year, Erin!!!! ✨✨✨ Oh it's never too late for that. Down below ~

Chris huffs, their thumb dragging lazily across the screen of their phone. Another hour wasted listening to some overly ambitious sycophant drone on and on about a business proposal.

Useless, of course. Just another person wasting time on kissing their ass in hopes of rubbing elbows with their father. If their father wasn't in the room, Chris wouldn't bother pretending to care.

This was the first New Year's Eve in years that Chris had shown up alone. You weren't on their arm, no easy banter to distract from the myriad of questions they couldn't avoid. Jade could've come, but even the thought of her at their side felt... wrong. Besides, Chris' parents wouldn't have allowed it.

"They're under the weather." Chris lied smoothly whenever someone asked about you. "I'll pass along your regards." A well-practiced excuse, easier than admitting the truth—you were gone.

It had only been a week since the breakup, and already Chris could imagine the incessant questions their parents would ask. The truth lingered like an uncomfortable itch: Jade had filled a space, but not the one that mattered. Not the one you had left behind.

They could go home, drink that expensive champagne stashed away for the wedding, pop the cork, and down their day. However, what awaited them were rumpled sheets and a pair of chewed-up penny loafers, courtesy of the sulking fluffball in the corner.

Their phone buzzes in their hand, pulling them from their thoughts. A notification flashes across the screen: Your Year in Review.

They hesitated. It wasn't like they were paying attention to the person prattling on. With a flick of their finger, they opened the notification, and the slideshow began.

A strange sensation coursed through Chris, one they couldn't quite place. Surely, it was their mother's punch earlier that had left them off-balance.

Photo after photo stared back at them—smiling faces, laughter frozen in time. You leaning against them, your head thrown back, eyes lit with joy they hadn't seen in... how long? An engagement photo, the ring catching the light just right.

Chris swallowed hard, their throat tight. Their thumb twitched, but they couldn't swipe away, couldn't stop the memories from washing over them.

The smiles then weren't as practiced, weren't as forced. Not like the one they shoot their mother as she presses a hand to their shoulder.

"Chris, what are you doing? You know now is not the time to be taking a break. You need to mingle. Now is the best time to rub elbows when they're half drunk and loose with their wallets."

"In a minute," Chris replies, brushing her hand away without even looking up. The words come out smooth, detached, practiced—just like the smile they forced onto their face whenever anyone approached.

Their mother’s presence lingered for a moment longer before she clicked her tongue and moved on. Chris exhaled shakily, their eyes flicking back to the phone.

The slideshow was relentless, each photo more damning than the last. Your laugh. The way you'd looked at Chris, trust and love shining in your eyes. That warmth twisted something deep in Chris' chest, a sensation they couldn't shake.

Jade had tried. She’d promised “a night to remember,” but as far as Chris was concerned, she had already given them one that they're still paying for. The thought of her there, that insincere smile and hollow charm, made Chris feel cold.

They were supposed to have it all. The success. The prestige. The partner. But the truth, raw and undeniable, was that none of it mattered without...

Chris tightened their grip on the phone as the slideshow ended. The screen went dark, leaving them staring at their reflection in the glossy black. They barely recognized the person staring back.

The party swirled around them, laughter and music blending into a cacophony of reminders of what they’d lost. Chris straightened their tie, fixing a mask of confidence onto their face.

Let them believe everything was fine. Let them think Chris Clarke still had it all.

But no matter how much they drank, no matter how many smiles they faked, no matter how many nights Jade clung to them in bed, whispering promises against their skin—promises that this fucked-up relationship was worth it, that it would all be worth it—none of it could fill the void.

When the kisses faded, when the night grew still, and the weight of it all settled in, that emptiness wouldn’t go away.

The void left behind, that emptiness—it looked too much like you.

[luvvzinspo]

(I HOPE YOU FEEL BETTER ❤️❤️)

I have a terrible idea, and I need to tell someone... imagine cuddling with Daisuke for the first time. Everything is fine, you lie on him, hugging him gently. when you suddenly feel his erection in his pants( idk how to explain it more, so iykyk) . He is so embrassed about it, But both of you don't comment on it (if you want you can change it). (You dont need to make NSFW, its your choice) You dont need to write this or anything, if you are uncomfortable, just leave it here

KISSES and have a nice day/ night 😘❤️

ans: okay, I'm not sure how exactly to write this, but hell yeah! ��� (Btw yeah, I kinda got straight to the point aha)

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

(read anon's question for summary)

(NSFW)

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

•❀• You and daisuke were cuddling after a long day, your leg over his, his face pressed against your chest.

•❀• You hear him mumble something incoherent, and he shifts uncomfortably.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

"You okay?"

"Uhm.. hah, yeah. I'm fine."

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

•❀• He tries to cross his legs slightly, but it just seems to make whatever he's hiding even worse.

•❀• He looks up at you, so you tilt your head, obviously confused.

•❀• He shifts a bit more, and you feel something against your thigh, You look down. He's crazy, isn't he?

•❀• He knows you know, but he doesn't want to say anything just yet. He squeezes his eyes, hoping you won't say anything either.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

"Daisuke? Are you..? Um, I'm guessing you know what I'm talking about."

"W-Well, yeah!.. It's all your fault though, and it's a natural reaction so..!"

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

•❀• His face gets completely red with blush, and he looks incredibly embarrassed and nervous.

•❀• He avoids your gaze, not wanting to continue the conversation. But you decided to speak up.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

"Do you wanna.. take care of it?"

"Wha—... Huh?!"

"I mean, we were about to go to bed, but I can like.. stroke you off, y'know?"

"...Yeah, okay.. I'd like that.."

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

•❀• He tries to hide his excitement, but he's basically shaking. He sits up in the bed, and so do you.

•❀• You tug on his pants, he gasps slightly but lifts his hips, allowing you to pull them down, leaving him in only his boxers.

•❀• He looks at you, pleading, as you take his boxers off too, the fabric simply brushing against him is a little bit too much to handle.

•❀• Once they're all the way off, his erection springs free. He gently bites his lip, fighting the urge to just do it himself.

•❀• You wrap your hand around his hardened member, before slowly beginning to stroke him.

•❀• He lets out a shaky breath as your hand envelopes him, the feeling of your touch sending a jolt of pleasure through his body. He lets his head fall back against the pillows, his eyes fluttering shut as you start to move your hand.

•❀• His hips buck up involuntarily as you continue, your touch driving him insane. His breathing becoming heavier, his chest rising and falling with each pant as he moans softly.

•❀• He grips the sheets tightly, his knuckles turning white as he tries to hold back his release. His eyes snap open and he looks up at you, a pleading look in his eyes.

•❀• He can barely form words right now, but the desperation in his expression is clear. He’s so close to finishing already, but he wants to hold out a little longer.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

"You're almost finished, already?"

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

•❀• He nods eagerly, unable to speak as he struggles to keep himself from coming. His body is trembling with the effort, his breaths coming in short gasps. He can feel the heat pooling in his stomach, the tension building with every stroke of your hand. You decide to speed it up.

•❀• A strangled moan escapes his lips as you quicken your pace, his hips bucking up into your hand. He’s completely lost in the sensation, his mind clouded with pleasure. He can feel his climax approaching rapidly now, and he knows he won’t be able to hold it back much longer.

•❀• With a final gasp, he reaches his limit, his whole body tensing as he spills into your hand. He lets out a loud, drawn-out moan, his back arching off the bed as he rides out his orgasm. His chest heaves as he tries to catch his breath, his eyes still squeezed shut.

•❀• You smirk slightly, proud of yourself, as he grabs onto your hand, exhausted.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

"Mmph.. thank you.."

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

•❀• He mumbles against your chest, clearly tired from everything that just happened.

•❀• You rest your leg over his, and gently massage and scratch his scalp as you both return to cuddling.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

I might do a Q&A, idk, I'm so bored for some reason. But this was really fun to write, thanks anon!! 🎀

[the-grimm-writer]

Love Bites

I love how it's been unanimously decided Shoko is for the girls.

MDNI

Tw: Dubcon, biting, blood, dacryphilia, oral, fem reader

.

There was something wrong with Shoko. As a doctor, she was too aware that the pain coursing through her body wasn't the normal kind. Her head was pounding, and her teeth ached, making her want to bit down on something to relieve it.

She was lying alone in her bed, a trickle of sweat trickling down her forehead, and she's sickly pale. She panted softly, gripping onto the dark grey sheets. Her mind was spinning to the point that she couldn't remember how she got home last night.

At the thought of last night, memories flashed through her, but she couldn't remember all of them. But she did remember you, begging her to go with you to the club. Shoko recalled doing a few shots with you before you rushed to the dance floor. She chatted with a few people. Gojo and Geto, she believed. But she didn't really care about that.

She remembered focusing on you, the way you happily spun around. The flashing lazer lights made it look like you were moving in slow motion. She preferred to watch you instead of joining in, leaning back on the chair she was sitting in as she smoked a cigarette. It was easy to keep an eye on you since she had a much higher alcohol tolerance than you did.

But then someone grabbed her and dragged her away with ease while you weren't looking. She felt their arm press against the lower half of her face so she couldn't yell, and a warm, metallic substance filled her mouth. They kept her mouth covered until she swallowed.

That was all she remembered before her memory went blank. She didn't know how she woke up back in her home, writhing in her bed in pain, not wearing any clothes.

She clenched her fists, and she could feel her nails were longer and sharper than they were before as they dug into the palms of her hand. But it was something she hardly noticed.

A wave of agitation spiked through her as her phone went off. Her sensitive ears picking up on the ringing made her want to throw the device across the wall. Yet she managed to push that urge down,

"Hello, Ieiri?" Somehow, the sound of your sweet voice soothed the pain. "Are you okay? You just disappeared from the club. I'm so sorry. Did something happen?"

She felt a pang go through her as she heard your sad tone. She could tell that you blamed yourself for her disappearing all of the sudden.

It gave her motivation to slowly get up. Her mouth felt dry as she finally spoke.

"I'm fine, (Y/n). I just wasn't feeling well. I'm sorry I didn't let you know."

You immediately responded. "I understand. I was just so worried, it's been three days and I've heard nothing from you. Are you okay? Is it okay if I come by? Do you need anything?"

You didn't know what to call your relationship with Shoko. You couldn't say friends. Friends didn't know how you tasted. Friends didn't know your body the way Shoko does. But you weren't officially a couple. And neither of you had made a move yet.

A small smile crept its way to her face. "I don't need anything." She gently reassured you.

You immediately responded back to her. "Okay. But I'm still coming over."

She sighed, knowing there was no stopping your stubborn self. She stayed where she was, not moving from her spot on the bed until she heard a knock on her door twenty minutes later.

You'd rushed over as fast as you could. Shoko groaned softly as she forced herself up, a wave of lightheadedness hit her as she did. But she pushed through it, grabbing ahold of her robe she had and threw it on.

When she opened the door, you gasped as you took in her ghastly appearance.

A chill ran down your spine as you looked at Shoko. Your heart started racing, feeling the hair on the back of your neck stood up. You stepped back, like your body was sensing danger and was telling you to run.

But that was impossible. Shoko isn't dangerous.

You ignored it and stepped inside, shutting the door behind you.

"Are you sick? You look pale as a ghost." You said sadly and brought your hand up to her forehead.

You gasped and pulled away, shocked. She was cold. Unnaturally so.

Her hand latched out and grabbed your wrist, pulling you back towards her. Your eyes widened as your face hit her shoulder as you stumbled into her. Her arms snaked around you, causing you to instinctively hug her back.

"I'm sorry." Shoko said softly. In a strange way, even her voice sounded different. Three days had felt like three years to her. Her desire for you as she felt your body heat growing stronger.

You were so, so warm. She pulled your closer to her, making you gasp softly. It was comforting, the opposite of her.

Her hand snaked into your hair, making you gasp as she suddenly gripped it hard. She brought her face towards your neck and inhaled.

Your sweet, signature perfume filled her senses. But she could sense more than that now. Your natural scent mixed in with it, making you smell addicting to her.

From where she stood, she could hear your heart thumping in her chest, the blood coursing through your veins. It sent a sharp pain through her empty stomach like it was telling her to feed it.

Your protests fell on deaf ears as you tried to pull away, sensing something was wrong.

Shoko was starving. But not in the typical human way. She was hungry for you. Like a starving wolf that just stumbled upon an injured rabbit.

A low growl left her as she pressed her lips against your neck, feeling your pulse against it. It made what little self-control she had left snap in half.

Her pain immediately went away as her fangs sunk into your neck. Driven by a carnal desire, she couldn't stop herself. Her hand was still gripping your hair, her other arm wrapping around her waist as she pulled you so your body was completely pressed against her own.

You could only look up at the ceiling as she forced your head back. A shocked, pained whimper escaping your lips. It was a pitiful sound, and Shoko loved it.

Her brown eyes turned a dark red as your thick, warm blood filled her mouth. The metallic taste was more addicting than she ever thought that it would ever be.

After a minute that felt like an eternity, Shoko slowly pulled away, lapping away the blood that trickled down your neck, causing you to cry out. She looked down at you for an unreadable expression for a moment.

Your eyes were wide with horror, tears bubbling up in your eyes as you looked into her crimson ones. You didn't know whether to cry or scream when her bloody lips curled into a smile, revealing her red stained teeth. Fangs, sharped and curved where her canine teeth used to be.

Her slender hand reached out and cupped your cheek, gently hushing you as more tears began to stream down your face. You flinched as her thumb

"I'm sorry, (Y/n)," she said softly again, genuinely apologetic even though this was the most beautiful she's ever seen you, vulnerable in her arms. "But I need you. I don't know what's going on. You're the only one I could think about. I can't survive without you."

Your heart panted in your chest. Your neck throbbed in pain, and tears were streaming down your cheeks. Your instincts were screaming to get away from her. That the woman you loved was dead, replaced by a monster with a thirst for your blood.

Yet your heart yearned for her no matter how dangerous she was. She'd always be the one you went running towards, even when it meant that you'd be hurt. Besides, you'd never forgive yourself if you ran away when she's reaching out for you to help.

These feelings were terrifying.

When you didn't run, she slowly leaned in and pressed her forehead against yours. Neither of you said a word, staying in that position for a few tense seconds.

You closed your eyes as she moved in for a kiss. Her lips were as cold as the rest of her body, but her kisses were just as addicting as they always were. She took things slow just as she used to, making sure you were comfortable.

Pressing you against the wall, she gently pushed her tongue in your mouth. You ignored the way you could taste your blood as you accepted, letting her take control.

"I'll make this up to you, my love."

You always melted when she called you her love. You almost let her bite you again.

Her hand snaked around yours, and you followed her into her room.

She pushed you onto the dark grey bed that she'd just been screaming in pain in less than an hour ago.

"Wait!" You said breathlessly as she got on top of you, working on pulling off your shirt.

You hesitantly let her, feeling how eager she was. Nearly desperate as she got you undressed.

She threw your clothes to the floor, and you arched your back, letting her unclip your bra and throw it to the side before she worked on your pants.

You never felt insecure around Shoko. She always looked at your curves adoringly like you were a piece of art.

Laying there in the bed, Shoko slowly got up so she could undo her robe and let it drop to the floor as well.

She stood there for a moment, letting you look at her. The roundess of her breasts, soft pink nipples hard. She was rubbing her thighs together, soaked just as she thought about what she was going to do.

Licking her lips, she moved forward, spreading your legs apart.

You leaned back on her bed, head resting on her pillow and closed your eyes. A smile crept its way to her face as she pressed her lips against your leg.

Her teeth grazed against your inner thigh, causing you to shiver as she teased you. She trailed kisses up until she got towards your cunt.

She paused for a moment, building up the tension as she looked at you. A smirk crept its way to her face.

There were many things that she could do. She had a strap on, lots of toys she had that would make you scream with pleasure. And kinkier things like whips and restraints.

But for Shoko, there was nothing more intimate than this.

She clamped her hands on your thighs so you couldn't get away from her. She smiled, fangs still peaking out as she opened her mouth and ran her tongue across your slit.

You gasped, just as she expected. Shoko let out a groan, enjoying how sweet you tasted.

"Ieiri." You let out a sigh as she took her time, knowing exactly how to get you worked up as she teased your clit with the tip of her tongue.

As she felt you twitch, growing more aroused, she started to pick up her pace, eating you out like it was her last meal.

The side of your neck still throbbed in pain, yet it seemed to only add to the intensity of the pleasure.

She started spelling her name into your tight pussy. You cried out, gripping onto the sheets tight.

You became more restless, grinding and pushing your hips up against her as her fingers dug into your thighs. She left no inch of your cunt untouched.

Shoko groaned against you as she kept licking and kissing you, not bothering to come up for air for even a second. She kissed your wet pussy before she started to suck on your clit.

You cried out, hand slowly reaching out and pulling on her long brown hair hard as she started to fuck you with her tongue pushing against your tight entrance.

She knew her body like the back of her hand. She knew every spot that would get you closer to cum. Digging her nails into your thighs, she made sure not to break skin. Only doing it to keep you squirming around her mouth like a woman possessed.

"Iri!" You could barely speak, stammering as you gripped onto her hair tight. "I'm gonna - fuck! Yes!"

You screamed as you pulled her against you more, bucking your hips up. Your toes curled, and your eyes rolled back as you came.

She didn't know which she loved the taste of more, your blood or your pussy. Not a single drop went to waste, lapping up every drop before she gave you one last lick and pulled away.

Shoko smiled, finally letting you close your legs and allowing you to shift around the bed to get comfortable. You were still trembling like a leaf, dazed from your intense orgasm.

Her heart wasn't beating, yet this was the most alive that she'd ever felt. Watching your body shaking from the pleasure and unable to form a coherent sentence as you stared up at the ceiling in shock.

Even though she wanted to keep going, she didn't want to push you farther than she already had. So she climbed up and rolled onto the bed beside you, pulling your exhausted form close to her.

You nuzzled into her, and she kissed the top of your head as you closed your eyes. She kept her arm around your waist as she leaned back and got comfortable herself.

Poor thing, she thought to herself. You fell asleep so fast before she could even speak. Not that she minded, she had all the time in the world to speak with you now.

Shoko sighed as she grabbed and lit a cigarette, her free hand holding it and flicked it into the ashtray she kept on the nightstand by her bed. Her other hand gently rubbed your waist as you slept nuzzled against her side, head resting on her shoulder.

It was hard to adjust at first, with the constant pain. It was only soothed when she finally got some blood into her system, but it turned out to be worth it. She felt better than she ever has in her life. Like everything that had been holding her back was just a distant memory now.

And more importantly, she had you by her side. You were all hers, just like she's wanted since the day that she met you.

Now, all she wanted was to know who'd turned her. She didn't know whether or not she wanted to slap them or thank them.

Like it was sensing her thoughts, her phone started going off again. She brought it up to her ear, cigarette dangling between her lips and her other arm wrapped around your waist as she spoke.

"Hello?"

She rolled her eyes as an obnoxiously familiar voice filled her ear.

"I knew you'd transition well," the male said playfully when another one cut in as well.

"For a moment, we almost thought you were dead," the calmer one of the two added bluntly.

"Well, that's nice of you to come check." She said dryly, not surprised those two idiots didn't.

He snickered. "And ruin the surprise? We figured you'd want some alone time with your little doll first. You're welcome."

They were a pain in her ass, yet she wasn't surprised it was them that picked up on her true feelings for you. She'd been on dates before and had a few failed relationships. But they all paled in comparison to you.

Shoko was a selfish woman. She was aware of that. Hell, she wasn't a doctor because she wanted to help people. It was simply because she was good at the job.

It didn't help having two friends that fueled her bad habits. Keeping cigarettes and lighters on them for her nicotine addiction. They bought her as many drinks as her heart desires since she's always had the highest alcohol tolerance and drank often.

And now they've provided her with her most recent addiction.

[mattsfavouritewhore]

Just Go Part 3 - Chris sturniolo

a/n: oh hey pooks!! enjoy this little plot twist of a story

just go part 2 part 4

The morning after their confessions, you couldn’t shake the feeling that something was… off. You woke to an empty bed, the cool sheets where Chris had been, and the space beside you felt wider than it ever had before.

You tried not to panic, but the absence of his warmth was a jolt to your system. Last night had been perfect, filled with kisses that seemed to echo long after they’d stopped, confessions that had revealed more than just the depth of your attraction—but also the tenderness neither of you had dared admit. And now, Chris was gone. Not even a note. No trace.

You sat up, your pulse quickening. Did I do something wrong?

But then you saw it: a text from Chris.

Chris: Good morning, I’m sorry, I needed to clear my head. I’ll be back in a little while. Let’s talk then, okay?

Your fingers tightened around the phone. You weren’t sure if it was the coolness of the message, the sudden distance, or the lingering doubt that gnawed at your insides, but you felt an unsettling sensation creep up your spine.

Clear his head?

A million questions raced through your mind, none of them satisfying. And so, you did what you often did when your thoughts spiraled—you poured yourself a cup of coffee, letting the warmth fill your hands as you tried to regain your composure.

You hadn’t expected the vulnerability of last night to be so easily eclipsed by confusion. You had been so… raw. So real. What was he afraid of?

Just as you were starting to tell yourself to relax, to breathe, there was a knock on the door. Your heart leapt in your chest.

You rushed to answer it.

Standing in the doorway, your eyes briefly flickering with recognition before you masked it, was… not Chris.

It was Harper. Your best friend.

Harper stood there, looking a little out of breath, her dark hair slightly askew, her eyes wide with something between curiosity and concern.

“Hey, can I come in?” Harper’s tone was too casual, but her gaze kept darting behind you, as if searching for someone.

“Uh… sure,” you said, stepping aside. Your mind was still racing. “What’s going on? Is something wrong?”

Harper stepped inside, shutting the door behind her. She held something in her hand, a small, folded piece of paper. Your stomach tightened, and a sudden unease crept in.

Harper cleared her throat, glancing down at the paper before holding it out. “I, uh… I think you need to read this.”

You frowned, your heart pounding as you took the paper from Harper’s hand. You unfolded it slowly, your eyes scanning the words that felt like a punch to your gut:

y/n,

I never meant to hurt you, but you deserve the truth. What happened last night—what you think happened with me—wasn't real.

The attraction I felt wasn’t to you. It was to someone else. Someone you know. I didn’t want to lie to you, but I was trying to figure out how to navigate the mess of feelings I have for both of you. I can't keep pretending. I hope you understand why I left so suddenly.

I’ll always care for you. But not in the way you think. Please don’t hate me.

—Chris.

The world tilted.

Your knees buckled, and you sank into the nearest chair, holding the letter as if it might slip from your fingers at any moment. Your chest was tight, the breath caught in your throat. Not in the way you think.

What was this? You looked up at Harper, but your best friend’s face was unreadable.

“Harper, what is this?” you whispered, your voice shaking. “Is this some kind of joke? Because this… this doesn’t make sense. Chris and I… we were…” You trailed off, feeling your heartbeat hammer against your ribs.

Harper didn’t answer right away, her eyes flickering as if she was weighing something heavy on her mind. After a long moment, she took a deep breath.

“Look, I don’t want to hurt you, but I think you need to hear this. Chris… Chris was never supposed to be with you.” Harper’s voice was soft, almost hesitant, but firm in the way she spoke the truth. “He came to me. Confessed everything. The attraction, the feelings he thought he had for you… but they were never really there.”

You blinked, trying to piece it together. “What are you talking about? Are you saying—”

Harper cut you off, her eyes filled with regret. “Look, I’m the one he’s in love with. Not you. It was always me.”

Your world collapsed. The ground beneath your feet felt like it was crumbling, but it wasn’t just your heartbreak you were feeling—it was the betrayal. Chris. And Harper. Your best friend and the man you had fallen for—how had they kept this from you?

Harper stepped forward, her eyes soft but laced with a sadness you had never seen before. "I’m sorry, I never meant for this to happen. But after last night… I couldn’t let him keep lying to you."

You stood up, your voice shaking with a mix of disbelief and hurt. “So you and Chris? All of this was just some twisted game to you both? Did you think I wouldn’t find out?”

Harper flinched but didn’t back down. “No, it wasn’t like that. I care about you. But I couldn’t watch him struggle like this, pretending he wanted something he didn’t.” She hesitated. “He tried to walk away from me. He even tried to convince himself it was you. But he couldn’t. He couldn’t lie anymore.”

Your mind was racing, every word, every memory of Chris replaying in your head—every kiss, every touch, all of it a lie.

But then, just as you were about to scream, to demand answers from both of them, there was a sudden knock at the door. A familiar knock.

Your heart stopped. You didn’t have to look to know who it was.

Chris.

Harper stiffened, her eyes darting toward the door, and for a moment, you were frozen, caught between rage and heartbreak.

This was a betrayal that ran deeper than you could’ve ever imagined. But Chris was standing there now, and somehow, this wasn’t over.

Not yet.

“Hey,” Chris’s voice called from the other side of the door. “I need to explain everything. Please, just let me—”

Before he could finish, you stormed toward the door, wrenching it open with every ounce of fury and heartbreak you could summon. You faced him, your chest rising and falling with the weight of everything you had just learned.

“No,” you said, your voice shaking but resolute. “No more lies. No more pretending.”

Chris’s face fell. But just as you were about to speak again, he took a step closer. “I didn’t mean for this to happen. You have to understand—”

But you stepped back. “I don’t need you to explain anything to me anymore. I need you to leave. And I need to find out who I really am without either of you.”

Chris opened his mouth to say something, but you turned away, slamming the door shut behind you, kicking both of them out.

You stood there for a long moment, breathing deeply, your hands trembling, and your heart shattering.

The love you thought was yours—was never yours to begin with.

And now, you had to figure out what came next.

a/n: oof the tensions hot.. i wonder what happens next, thats IF something happens next.

tag: @riggysworld

[witchygagirlwrites]

Consider Me Gone-Part 2

Greg "Mouse" Gerwitz x Reader x Jay Halstead/Gerstead x Reader

A trauma rolls into med that nearly brings you to your limit. You need Jay and Mouse yet for the first time when you reach your hand out there's not even one there to grasp it.

Warnings: SCENE OF AN O.D.

“Please no” Cassandra begged, falling into your arms. You requested to come along on this notification and now you were regretting it but knew you had to face it “I’m so sorry Cassie” you whispered and felt her knees go out from under her. The two men with you moved to support her but you glared at them as you sank to the floor with her, wrapping your arms protectively around the other woman “He wasn’t alone. I promise you, I was there. I held his hand. I made sure he wasn’t hurting in those last moments. That’s all I could do” 

You shot up out of the bed, a fine sheet of sweat covering your body. Mouse and Jay both were on high alert, shooting up on either side of you. “Sweetheart, what is it?” Mouse asked and you shook your head “Nothing, doesn’t matter” the sting of their words the previous night was still a little too fresh to admit that while finding Mark plagued their memories, his wife’s reaction and pain plagued yours. Jay’s face fell as if he knew just exactly why you’d said nothing “Baby, talk to us”

You shook your head “I said I’m fine” you glanced at the time and saw it was only about an hour before your alarm would’ve gone off anyways. “I’m gonna grab a shower and start coffee” “I’ll start coffee” Jay offered so you nodded and slid out of the bed at the foot of it so you didn’t have to go over either one of them. 

Jay climbed out of bed after you and walked past you while you were picking through your dresser for a pair of scrubs. He placed one hand on your lower back and it took everything in you to not tense under his touch. “I love you” he spoke before kissing the side of your head. “I love you Jay” you whispered, keeping your eyes on the contents of the drawer in front of you.

You didn’t have to look to know he shot Mouse a look before leaving the room. Divide and conquer was always their route when it came to thinking one of them had done something to hurt your feelings in some way and since Jay was the one who’d actually voiced the thought, apparently Mouse was the one tasked with damage control.

You didn’t hear the bed move before you felt Mouse at your back. “Can I please put my arms around you?” he asked and you nodded. He slipped his arms around your waist, pulling you back against his chest “I’m sorry for what was said, Jay is too. It came out wrong” you nodded simply because you didn’t trust your voice to not waver at the moment.

He stood there for a moment just holding you and you wanted so bad just to forget the hurt. How humiliating it felt when they both had acted as if your time spent overseas was nothing because you weren’t an active combatant. You had the same base training as them, you weren’t exactly Desmond Doss. You believed in kill or be killed and had done whatever it took to keep your unit safe. On top of that to know that they couldn’t even turn to a man that served, it was another woman. Yeah she’d been in your unit but how could they not realize how that would make you feel?

“Greg, I’ve got to get a shower” you whispered and he pressed a kiss to your shoulder where the tank you’d worn to bed left it bare “Ok. You want some breakfast?” you shook your head “I’ll just get some coffee” he left his arms drop and you had to remind yourself to not run from the room. What the hell were you doing to yourself? You had to get in a better mindset before work.

When you got out of the shower and were dressed you headed to the kitchen and could hear the two of them talking. “You know that was a nightmare right?” “Well damn Greg I never would’ve guessed” “Since when does she not tell us about them?”

You stepped around the corner and cleared your throat. Both of their heads whipped around at the sound and they looked like kids with their hands caught in the cookie jar “Is the coffee ready?” Mouse held up your mug and you knew it was made to your taste. You walked over and took it from his hand with a small smile “Thank you”

You leaned back against the counter and took a sip before asking “How’s the case going anyways?” They exchanged a look before Jay said “Voight think’s he has a lead. Him and Al were gonna go talk to a few people they knew this morning” “Good” you replied and left it at that. Normally mornings in your house were spent talking over coffee, planning for the week ahead. Today felt like there was a space between you and them that was strangling you with every breath you took.

______________

You dumped the rest of your coffee “I’m gonna get going” “Can we talk after work?” Jay asked and you cut your eyes at him “Sure you want to talk to me?” his shoulders sagged slightly “Princess there’s no one else on earth we’d rather talk to” you laughed humorlessly “Really?”

He ran a hand down his face “Baby, it was a freaking beer!” “A beer with another woman Jay!” you argued and he waved a hand “A woman who was in our freaking unit! Who was in the field with us! Who saw the same shit we did!” you shook your head “I was there Jay! I saw the same shit! Who the hell do you think they drug Mark back to? Who do you think had to try their fucking hardest to save him only to have to tell his wife that they couldn’t?”

Mouse stepped between you and Jay “Take a breath, both of you” you glared at him “You aren’t fucking innocent either Greg. You did the same thing! Jay is just verbal about his bullshit! Why don’t you tell me how fucking useless I am too? About how my trauma isn’t valid because I wasn’t in the field? How I WASN’T THERE TOO?”

They both flinched when you screamed but you didn’t care, hot tears were spilling down your face by that point “Ever stop to think that when Erin called to give me that heads up that it took me right back to that day too?” you looked between them and they both dropped their gaze. You nodded slowly “Of course not. You two found him, yeah and that was fucking horrific. I care enough about you two to never take away from anything you’ve endured but I am the one that he was laid on a stretcher in front of and tasked with trying to save! I am the one who had to lie and tell him he was going to be ok! I am the one who watched life leave his eyes and I am the one who held his wife when she was told her husband, the father of her twins, was not coming home. I don’t give a fuck what Athena saw. You two were drowning, ok. You come to me! ME! No one else! We’re supposed to have each other’s backs! We’ve always had each other’s backs but because she’s in town all of a sudden I’m not good enough?”

“We never once said that!” Mouse argued but a phone chiming interrupted all of you. You glanced towards the counter to see Jay’s phone lit up. You knew both of their passwords like they knew yours so you walked over to pick it up and saw it had Athena’s name on it. You didn’t even look at the text. You picked it up and threw it at Jay’s chest. 

“You two don’t even care that I’m here in front of you do you? Just because she was in the field. Did she put you two back together? Did she let herself jump so far down into that darkness just to help you two dig yourselves back up? I did! I needed you two to talk to me last night because then that meant you trusted me with the hell in your head. You didn’t. You talked to her. You chose her. Sometimes what you don’t say comes through so much clearer than what you do” 

You spun on your heel to walk out the room but both of them caught you, trying to put their arms around you. You shoved them off “No! Fuck you! You don’t get to touch me!” They both put their hands up defensively. You hadn’t realized your hands were shaking until you raised them to point one at each of them “I love both of you with my entire fucking heart but you need to decide what it is you want”

You stormed out of the room, stopping just long enough to grab your keys and phone before slamming the door behind yourself.

You sat in your car with your head leaned back against the seat, trying your best to stop the damn tears. Your phone hadn’t stopped ringing since you left home. Jay and Mouse were taking turns calling and texting. When they got to work they would probably resort to either using landlines or stealing the unit’s phones.

You took a deep breath and clicked on the group text thread. M:Sweetheart please answer your phone   J:Baby just talk to us  M:You know we would never want anyone but you  J:No one would ever compare to you   M:We love you more than anything   J:Please just answer your phone

You texted back I have to go into the hospital now. I can’t have my head on this when people are hurt or sick in front of me. You both know what you mean to me. I don’t know what that text said and I don’t want to know. I do need to know where I stand by the time my shift ends

With that you locked your phone and slid it into your pocket, checked to see just how horrible you looked then climbed out of your car. 

Two car wrecks, a delivery done in the ed, a GSW and three people with the flu covered your first five hours of your shift. You still weren’t in the best mind set but you were doing what you did best, pushing it to the side to help the people in front of you. That was how you maintained your balance, how you didn’t lose yourself. That was something you’d found long ago.

You were in the breakroom when Will came in and you dropped your gaze, pulling out your phone and hoping he hadn’t noticed you weren’t quite aces. “There’s my favorite sister in law” you cut your eyes up with a small smile “Hey Will” he sat down across from you “Are you ok?”

You nodded slowly “Yup, can not think of a single reason why I wouldn’t be” he stared at you for a moment before raising an eyebrow “I’m not the brother you’re in a relationship with but I have known you for quite a while. I love you, you’re like a sister to me.If something is wrong, even if it's something my brother or Mouse did you can talk to me” You nodded “I know. I promise, I’m ok Will. I had a bad night, dreams of delivering bad news kept haunting me” 

“Why did you do that? It wasn’t your job” he asked and you shrugged “I had letters, messages or just to let them know I held the person they loved so they wouldn’t be alone. I would want to know Jay or Mouse wasn’t alone” he smiled “You’re an extraordinary woman. Don’t know how the hell my brother and Mouse of all people got you”

You gave him a small smile “They looked cute in their ACUs” he shook his head with a laugh “There she is” then tapped on the table “I’ll be around if you need me. Just holler and I’ll come running sis” “Thanks Will”

__________________

You stepped out of the break room and heard Ethan call your name “We got an OD in trauma one Y/N! I need you”  you feel in step with him, running around the main desk and into the trauma room. You heard April calling out stats and saw Will administering another round of Narcan but when you glanced at the body on the bed, it felt like their voices were underwater. You could hear them but they were muffled. Your hands felt like they were tingling and your head felt like it may very well slip off your body. That jacket, that black jacket.

You hadn’t been back in Chicago but maybe a month. You just managed to rent a new place. It was a little one bedroom but it was in an ok neighboor and the rent didn’t kill you. You’d just gotten off back to back shifts and was curled up under three blankets from the harsh winter night. The sound of your phone blaring woke you up.You scrambled for it and squinted against the harsh glare before bringing it to your ear “Halstead I swear to christ..”

Before you could finish the threat he cut you off “I had a missed call from Mouse about an hour ago. He left a voicemail, he was slurring Y/N and now he isn’t answering” you were out of the bed before he finished talking “Come pick me up”

You followed Jay to the apartment he said was Mouse’s. He hadn’t let you out of his sight and honestly in this neighborhood? You were grateful. “How the hell are we gonna get in?” you asked and he cut his eyes up at a window. You shrugged and slung your med bag across your chest before pulling his knife out of his pocket “Give me a boost?”

He put his hands around your hips and hoisted you up. It didn’t take you long to pop the flimsy lock on the window and shimmy inside. “Y/N!” he called and you looked back out. He handed you a flashlight and his gun. “What do I need that for?” he shrugged “We don’t know what you’re going into. If it’s bad yell and I’ll kick the door in”

You turned the light on and readied the gun before stepping away from the window. Your heart shattered the moment you saw the interior of the apartment. There was no furniture,at all. A single mattress was on the floor and it felt colder inside than it did outside.

You cleared room by room and was starting to think maybe Greg had just drunk dialed Jay when you pushed open the bathroom door. “JAY!” you screamed. 

Mouse lay in the middle of the bathroom floor, a couple pill bottles lay in the sink and it didn’t look like he was breathing. You slid to your knees,throwing your med bag off onto the floor.  You rolled him over onto his side, the black jacket he wore was icy to the touch, when you noticed how grey his lips looked tears sprung to your eyes “No no no” you heard the front door bounce off the wall from the force of Jay kicking it in.

You reached for Mouse’s pulse and felt a weak, thready one. “CALL AN AMBULANCE JAY! HE’S OVERDOSED!” you screamed. You dug into your bag, shaking fingers wrapping around the narcan “Greg please don’t fucking do this to me” you whispered before bringing the medicine up to his nose and administering it. You turned him for rescue breaths, praying you hadn’t been too late. Jay ran into the room, still on the phone with the dispatcher “My-my friend is a trained medic”

You didn’t try to listen, your goal was getting to see those sky blue eyes you loved looking up at you again. “Please Greg” you whispered, administering the second dose after the time passed and was rewarded by a harsh gasp of air being forced into his lungs. “Tell them he’s breathing” you sobbed, turning him on his side again in case he puked. His eyes cracked open “Y/N?” you nodded, tears flowing down your face “Hey” “Don’t cry baby” he whispered weakly and you shook your head “Then stay awake till the ambulance gets here ok?”

“Y/N! Y/N!” you hadn’t realized you froze or that everyone in the room had realized it. Ethan, Will and April had gotten the patient stabilized but were now staring at you like they were worried you may be next “I’m sorry” you whispered and ran out of the room. 

Ethan found you in the break room, sitting on the floor with your head between your knees shaking. He crouched in front of you, close but not touching “Hey, can I touch you or no?” you shook your head and he smiled slightly “Ok. Can I get April or Maggie?” you nodded and he smiled “Stay here soldier. I’m gonna get you help. I won’t leave your side for long, I promise”

He came back a few moments later with April in tow. She climbed down next to you and slowly put her arm around you “Match my breathing honey”. You listened to her breaths and were able to slow yours after a few minutes while she kept two fingers on your pulse to check it. 

Once you were able to actually focus your eyes on them Ethan sat cross legged in front of you “Talk to me” you swallowed hard “That jacket the kid had” he nodded and you met his eyes “Greg had one just like it the night he overdosed and I thought we lost him” He shared a look with April and she nodded “I’m gonna go back to the floor sweetie. If you need me just send Ethan” you nodded “Thank you”

Once she left he looked back at you “When did it happen?” you swallowed hard “When we got back we all kind of went our own ways for a while. Jay, he sought comfort in bodies. Any bed he could warm he did. I visited families of the men I lost, delivering messages then I went to stay with my sister for a while, I barely slept or ate during that time. If it wasn’t eighty proof I didn’t want it and Greg well he found his own way to numb the pain” 

“How’d you get out of it?” he asked and you smiled slightly “Greg pulled Jay out of a hole. He was in bad shape. He’d started drinking bad, doing stuff that well he shouldn’t have been involved with. Greg got him home to Chicago. Those two being back here was like a magnet to pull my ass back” “What happened when Greg overdosed?” he asked so you recounted that night “He was so thin Ethan. I mean Greg has always had a slimmer frame but he’s always been lean muscle. We’re talking about a man that could toss me over his shoulder and laugh about it. That night, I could move him by myself with no issue. His lips were grey…it took two rounds of Narcan”

“I didn’t know” he offered and you nodded “I don’t think it would’ve hit that bad had intelligence not had just caught a case that trudged up memories of how we lost a man too. I was the medic that couldn’t save him..they don’t get that pain” he smiled slightly and nudged your knee “Lucky for you someone you know does. Any time anything like that hits you, call me. April won’t care. She loves you and wouldn’t want you to have to face it alone”

“You don’t know how much that means” you whispered and he nodded. “Feel like facing the outside world or wanna sit in here a while longer?” you shook your head “We’ve faced worse right?” he smiled “There’s that medic who sends em running” 

__________________

The moment you and Ethan stepped out of the break room you spotted Will. “Are you ok?” he asked and you nodded “Yeah, a little embarrassed” Ethan cut his eyes at you “That? We’re not doing that, ok?” you nodded “Ok” he smiled “Get to work medic” you grinned “Yes sir”

Will looked at you “Do I need to call Jay?” you shook your head “I’m ok” he gave you a look so you sighed “I’ll text them!” that seemed to appease him enough. “If you need me holler, ok?” “Ok”

How do you text your boyfriends that you screamed at that morning that you had a flashback and panic attack at work? Before Will says anything, I’m fine. Just a case threw me off. No big deal

M: What do you mean you’re fine, no big deal???  J: Do we need to come to you??  M: Are you ok??  

I’m fine, just had a bad time with a case that came in

M: What case? You stared at the text because no matter how mad you were you didn’t want to put guilt on him. He’d gone through hell. He’d fought to get and stay sober. You didn’t want to throw it in his face. Doesn’t matter and I don’t mean that like this morning. I’m ok now

M:If you need us, call. I love you  J: Even if I can’t come, Mouse will. I love you

Love you both, always

You slid your phone back into your pocket and jumped back into work.

By the time you got off you were dead on your feet but you considered stopping by the precinct to see everyone before going home. You didn’t want to text Jay or Mouse so you texted Erin Hey babe, want some coffee? It didn’t take long for her to text back Omg yes! I’ll steal you from dumb and dumber I will love you so much you laughed and sent back Text me orders

___________

You pulled into the front lot with the two carriers of coffee. You’d texted Erin to send help down and smiled when you saw Al coming out the front door “Oh she sent my favorite detective” he smiled “Hey kid” you passed him one carrier then grabbed the other and the extra coffee that was Trudy’s. 

“How was work?” he asked and when you grimaced he laughed “That good huh?” you shrugged “Put it this way? There’s days I kinda miss the simplicity of being a trauma medic compared to an ed nurse”

You followed him in and stopped at the front desk to offer Trudy her cup. She smiled “I have no clue how Mouse and Detective chuckles got a woman like you” you winked at her “Neither do they” 

You followed Al up the stairs after he scanned his palm. You could hear everyone’s voice drifting downstairs and smiled when you heard Erin and Kim laughing. You’d gotten close with the unit over time. They were your friends, hell your family. 

You made it to the bullpen and started passing out cups. Voight smiled “You’re an angel sweetheart” you shook your head “No one likes a liar now Hank” and everyone cracked up. You were about to ask where Jay and Mouse were when you heard their voices coming from the back hallway. You turned towards the door with a smile that quickly fell when you realized they weren’t alone. Athena was with them. “What the fuck” you and Erin both spoke in tandem.

All three heads turned towards your voice and Athena had the nerve to smile “Fireball” you grabbed the cups of coffee and threw them at Jay and Mouse “I’m done” you didn’t try to stop yourself from running that time. You ran down the stairs, hearing Erin’s raised voice along with Jay and Mouse’s followed by Voight yelling for everyone to shut up.

When you got to the lobby you slowed to a fast walk and nodded to Trudy but the moment you hit the door you ran for your car, collapsing into the driver’s seat.

____________________

You moved through the house with your duffle bag shoving everything you came across that belonged to you in it. Thank god the United States made sure to supply you with a bag big enough to pack your life in.

You snatched your old dogtags off the corner of the mirror where they hung with Mouse and Jay’s. They didn’t need them. You would burn your photos if you had enough time. Your goal was to get gone before they could get home. They knew how you felt, they knew your insecurities. You’d laid everything on the line for them and they hadn’t cared. She’d smiled in your face! SMILED.

You’d kill her if you ever got within arm’s reach again. She didn’t know them like you did. She didn’t know a damn thing about them compared to you. Every demon, every dark corner YOU faced. More tears broke free but that didn’t stop you. If you weren’t worth fighting for in their opinion why would you fight for them? 

You did a final look around then took your key off and laid it on the counter. You didn’t need it anymore. You locked the door behind yourself and threw your duffle into your trunk. Maggie would let you sleep on her couch until you could figure things out. Your life just fell down around you, the men you love just turned their backs on you. You’d never felt more alone but knew she wouldn’t turn you away. You did have some people that truly did love you even if Jay and Mouse weren’t on that list after all.

@desimarie12

@alterna123

@allisonargent144

[leaawrites]

I can’t tell you the way I feel

Liam Gallagher x fem!reader

Summary: when Liam takes on a dare from his friends, he doesn't believe of finding himself making the biggest mistake in his life.

Warnings: suggestive content, allusions to sex, angst, Liam being a dumb cunt

Wordcount: 1.6k

Masterlist

Waking before Liam did meant she had all of his peace to herself. No thought in his mind disturbing them, nobody around that could harm them. It was just their two bodies, tangled in love and sheets.

Reluctantly she began tracing the outline of his face. Her finger moving over his jaw, his lips, down his adam’s apple and over his collarbone. Softly tracing the bone that was stretching his skin towards her, calling for her.

Focused on her finger and how it found it’s way so effortlessly over his body, she didn’t notice Liam’s eyes opening. Confused at first, though softening when seeing her by his side. His arm tightening around her waist, pulling her closer. The sheet covering her chest falling down, exposing her cold skin to his warm one.

“Morning, love,” he greeted her, leaving a soft kiss on her lips. His voice raspy and still lower than she’d ever heard it before.

“Morning,” she answered back, a slight heat rising up her neck and rushing to her cheeks the longer he looked at her. His eyes never wavering from her own gaze, fixated on him.

Drawing small circles on her hips, he smiled as she took his other hand in hers, intertwining their fingers. Slowly leaving a trail of kisses up his arm, over his chest and on his neck, he let out a soft groan in reaction. His nose pressed against her shoulder, inhaling the scent of her bare skin.

Her soft lips gently sucked against the flesh under his ear. Giggling against his skin when she felt his arms around her waist tighten. His hands squeezing her hips.

Two bare chests pressed against each other, falling and rising in sync. Breathing as one.

“Wait, love. Stop.” His voice sounded desperate, like she hurt him. Soft, gentle kisses pierced a dagger through his heart, every single one a mark now on his skin. A reminder of his sin.

Bagging away slightly, she draped the sheet over her chest again. Looking at him with wide eyes, fear soothing through her that she’d done something wrong. Was it too much? Was it not good enough?

Seeing the look in her eyes, thoughts clearly spiraling through her head, he couldn’t form a good excuse. What seemed so easy with everyone else felt like a burden with her. Normally he’d say something like, ‘I promised my mum to be home already’ or ‘I should go, not that your parents find out’. But now, lying seemed to be too harmful.

“I need to -” he started talking, his finger pointing outside the window.

“You need to go?” Finishing his sentence for him, he nodded his head, shameful looking down, not catching the eye roll and sarcastic grin on her face before it disappeared again just as quickly as the realization came. Of course it was all just for a quick laugh with his friends. It was Liam Gallagher, for fucks sake. “I hope I’m not keeping you from going.”

Picking up her shirt and underwear from the floor, she quickly put them on, before walking over to the other side of the room and taking his clothes as well, throwing it his way before walking out the door.

A, “Wouldn’t dare to,” falling from her lips as she slammed the door shut behind her.

Still leaning on his elbows, Liam stayed like this as if he was frozen. The shower went off in the other room and that was when it hit him. He fucked it up completely. Throwing his head into the soft pillow he let out a groan. How could he not even find a good excuse to make it less shameful to walk out of her house?

He deserved it though, he decided ultimately as he found himself back out on the street, walking with his head low. He totally deserved it.

Unlike her.

Head leant against the door of the bathroom, she waited until she could hear the front door close before turning off the shower and letting the water from her eyes flow down her face. Of course he didn’t mean anything he said. Why did she even let him invite her to the gig anyway? Why did she have to go too?

When his body rushed towards her the night before, eyes lighting up as he found her and excitement being written all over his face, she believed that - maybe, somehow - Liam Gallagher wasn’t as much of a twat as she always assumed he was.

Though female intuition is barely ever wrong and that’s what she should’ve been listening to. Not the hammering of her heart or the lovesick thoughts in her brain for finally being seen by someone as more than just another face. It was her own fault.

Noel sat in the living room, feet propped up on the coffee table, eyes fixated on the telly, though he noticed when Liam walked in, the heavy stomp of his feet being too familiar.

Falling down in the seat next to him, a beer now in his hand, he popped open the can and starred at the people talking too. Neither acknowledging each other more than with their mind.

Until Noel spoke, “You weren’t too shite.”

“Thanks.” Taking another large sip, he tried ignoring his brother as much as he could.

“Though the songs sound like they’re written by a toddler. Did you write them then?” Noel was sure Liam would throw the telly at him as he said that with his sour mood, though he only chuffed, sinking further into the cushion. Trying to escape from this conversation. He knew where it would lead to.

“Not everything that’s shite in your mind is from me, alright? Cunt.”

Noel’s brows furrowed, why wasn’t he trying to strangle him yet?

“I’m not too opposed to the idea of joining anymore,” he tried it differently, trying to make his mood lighten.

“Cheers, mate. Gonna tell the others then.” His voice staying monotone and unwavering. Nothing could be a worse conversation topic at the moment in his opinion.

“Your bird’s fit.”

Jinx.

“She’s not my bird,” Liam tried, his voice growing defensive. Molding in the same tone that he had when talking to ehr the first time.

“So, she’s free?” Noel asked back, quite enjoying how deep in denial his brother was. Finally, Liam’s eyes snapped over to him, filled with horror and disgust.

“If you even try something, I swear-” before he could talk further, Peggy came in, a grocery bag in each hand.

“Would you boys stop fighting for once and help your mum carrying in the groceries?” she said, to which Noel immediately jumped up and went outside. Liam following him shortly after. The thoughts still running through his mind. He didn’t actually think she was fit, did he? Well, she was, but who was he to think that?

Later that night, when Liam was already laying in bed, cigarette in between his lips, Noel came walking in. He noticed how off his brother was for the whole day, of course he did. There was barely any talking done at the table, when normally Liam couldn’t shut up even if you’d sew his mouth shut. That night he was simply staring down at his food, not even eating it all. The worrying glance which Peggy sent Noel’s way after seeing her son this abnormal wasn’t easing his nerves.

“What’s got you so twisted?” He asked, sitting down on his own bed.

Liam leaned over, blowing the smoke from his mouth out of the window. “Nothing.”

“It’s about that girl, right? You fancy her and she didn’t want to hear any of it, because she knows you’re a cunt and rejected you, or what?” He asked further, remembering how defensive he got the first time Noel asked about her.

“I don’t fancy her,” was all he got as an answer.

“Sure.” Noel rolled his eyes, laying down himself. “She seemed nice though.”

“She is,” Liam agreed, making his brother’s head turn at the soft tone of his voice. “She’s too nice.”

“How so?”

Closing his eyes for a second, he knew he’d regret telling him what happened, nonetheless he did it. “I took her out because of a dare, and when she realized in the morning she didn’t even try to slap me or summat. She just-” his mind went back to her face, how she looked so distant yet like reality came back to her in the moment she realized. “She just walked out as if she should be ashamed.”

“You dumb cunt,” Noel groaned when Liam finished the story. He talked to her once, but from how she talked about Liam and defended him when Noel said that he had no trust in his brother’s abilities and interest in music, it made him feel proud in a way. Proud that Liam actually got somethin together for once in his life, he should’ve seen the downfall coming. And he did, just not that soon.

“You don’t just disrespect girls like tha’, especially no girls like her, alrigh’?” Noel threw his pillow across the room in Liam’s face, who only threw it back after complaining. “You make her feel seen and then you just push her off, that’s shite.”

“As if I’d listen to your advise,” Liam scoffed, taking another drag of his cigarette. Looking out of their window and down the street to where her house stood, he knew that Noel was right. Of course he was. You don’t just treat girls like that, especially not girls like her.

“Then don’t,” Noel shrugged. “But at least remember what Mum taught us.”

[nightlyrequiem]

Hehe I just saw some of you post about reader cheating on Val, but what about Val cheating on reader?.

A thought came to my head about how reader came from shopping, excited to show Valeria all the new expensive clothes she bought ready to model for her. As she searched for her, only to find her in their room with someone else. I know reader heart shattered into pieces, but not only that I think adrenaline rush through her veins thinking, if she’s replaceable, all the things she knew about Valeria aka el sin nombre, is her life now in danger?. So she makes a run for it to avoid talking and also for her safety. Maybe at the end they make up their mistakes or something

-🦋🦂

Hello Hello :) I wanted to write Val cheating on Reader for months now. Perfect for angst and I love angst. Left the ending a little open ended so you can decide if they make up or not. Personally, I think Reader and Val part ways because cheaters don't deserve redemption

Tags/Warnings: WLW, Cheating, Angst, Emotional Hurt, Physical Hurt (Not Abuse), Attempts at Emotional Comfort

Loves Me Not

Valeria was busy today. Too busy to spend time with you so she gave you her card and sent you off to buy yourself things you don't need.

'Get yourself something pretty to show off for me.'

You went to all your favourite stores and splurged and tops, skirts, dresses, pants, bags. You took your time looking over all kinds of glittery, shiny accessories. Picking ones that you think will catch her attention the most.

You tried on the clothes and admired yourself in the changeroom mirror. then finally made the journey back home. When you got out of the car you paused, seeing Valeria's car in the driveway. You thought she'd be away for the day. That's what she told you. You smile, happy that you get to spend more time with her then you originally thought.

You quietly enter the house and sneak off to the ground floor bathroom. Changing into one of the short flashy dresses you bought. Pulling on the hem and looking at yourself. You pull out one of the new necklaces you bought and clasp it around your neck, admiring the way the small gems glitter above your cleavage. You imagine the face she'll make when she sees you, and the events it will lead to. The shimmery little dress won't be on you for very long.

You walk out of the bathroom, leaving your bags to be collected later and creep up the stairs. The door to your bedroom is half-closed. You break out into a grin but stop when you hear giggling. You frown, confused and apprehensive of the noise. You step forward and push open the door.

The sight before you fills you with pain and repulsion. The woman on top of Valeria swivels around at the noise of you entering, eyes widened with surprise. Valeria sits up swiftly, almost knocking the woman off the bed. The woman quickly gathers up the sheets to cover her bare chest from view.

"I thought you'd be gone for longer." Valeria says harshly.

"Who the hell is this?" You ask, staring at the woman with dismay and anger. Her hands are clenched around the sheets - your sheets, tightly. 

Valeria runs a hand through her hair, face pinched into a stressed expression.

"She's... why are you back so early?" She snaps, sounding angry at you for walking in on her. A spike of fear shoots through you. What if she thinks you'll rat on her to the feds in revenge for cheating? You stare at them. Feeling your world crashing down around you. Valeria gets off the bed and it sets you on edge. She looks angry. Valeria doesn't deserve to be angry but that's not stopping her. You've never felt afraid of her before but when she takes a step towards you, you turn and flee. Hearing her running behind you.

"Stop!" She calls out. "Stop running, we can talk about this."

The only thought you have is that she's going to kill you in a fit of rage. She'll kill you to stop you from talking. She'll kill you for trying to leave. You miss a step running down the stairs and trip. Your ankle gives and pain shoots up your calf. You end up sprawling at the bottom of the staircase, afraid and in tears.

"Christ!" Valeria exclaims, looking down at you from the top.

"Did you push her?" The woman asks.

"Get out." Valeria snaps.

"Is she okay? You didn't push-"

"Get the hell out!" 

You drag yourself away from the stairs, sweating from the pain. Hurried steps go past you and you watch the woman leave. Slamming the door behind her. Your ankle throbs with your heartbeat. Valeria walks down the stairs and crouches over you.

"What's wrong with you?" She growls. "Why the hell did you run like that? Are you a child?"

"Let me leave." You say. "Please let me leave."

Valeria sighs and kneels down. "We need to talk."

"No we don't." You say shakily, trying not to cry. You're not sure what hurts more, your ankle or your heart.

Valeria rubs a hand over her face.

"I'm sorry." She says tiredly.

You go limp. Too hurt and tired to try getting up. "Why did you do this?" You ask.

Valeria's eyes bore into you. "Because I needed something different." She murmurs. "You're so high energy and always wanting to be around me, I needed a break from you."

Each word is a shot right into your heart. 

Valeria gently grabs ahold of you from under your arms and helps you to your feet. Your lean on her while she walks you to the ground floor bathroom. You press close to her. Though it brings you about as much comfort as hugging a cactus. She gently kicks aside your forgotten shopping bags and walks you inside. Making you sit on the lid of the toilet.

She avoids your gaze as she trails her hands down your calf, carefully removing your heel. You hiss in pain and look down. Your ankle is swollen and red. Valeria frowns and stands.

"I'm going to go get some ice." She murmurs. Leaving you alone. You replay the image of that woman on top of Valeria, feeling sick. I needed a break from you. Were you really that bad? You thought the two of you were happy.  I needed a break from you. Your throat tightens and your eyes sting. You try to fight back the hurt, not wanting her to walk in on you crying but you can't help it.

Valeria comes back, a small clear bag filled with ice chips in her hands. Your head is lowered, shoulders twitching slightly as you silently cry. Lips pulled back into a devastated grimace. Valeria hovers awkwardly, torn between pretending not to notice and wanting to offer comfort. She settles for the former. Bending down she fishes around under the sink and pulls out bandages to wrap your ankle. She works silently. The only sound being an occasional sniff from you.

Your ankle is lightly throbbing, but it hurts less.

"Come on," Valeria says. "Come lay down." She helps you to your feet again. The walk up the stairs is slow and painful. She turns to lead you to your bedroom but you stop.

"I don't want to rest in there." You whisper. Staring at the floor. "Put me in the spare room."

"... Don't be like that." She says. Rubbing your shoulder.

"I don't want to lay in the same bed that some other girl has been in." You reply tartly. 

Valeria's mouth opens and closes. "Fine." She says. Leading you down the hall to the spare room.

She helps you into bed and sets a pillow down for you to elevate your foot. Then you're left alone with your thoughts. You don't eat dinner that night. Valeria leaves it to grow cold outside the door. You fall in and out of sleep. Sometime during the night you take off the dress and throw it somewhere. It gets uncomfortable after prolonged wear. You watch the days pass through the window. More and more of your belongings make it into the spare room until it feels more like your actual bedroom.

Valeria gives you space during this time. Or perhaps takes this space for herself. I needed a break from you. You didn't think a single sentence would cut so deep. How long had she been feeling this way? How long had she been seeing that woman? Is she still seeing that woman? All your questions without answers are driving you mad.

One night, Valeria gently knocks on your door. You long to call out to her, but you just can't. She enters anyway, the door slowly creaking open.

"I brought you dinner." She says quietly. Steamed vegetables and some kind of meat. The smell makes your stomach clench with hunger. The bed dips as Valeria sits down on the side. "... I'm sorry." She says.

"Okay." You reply.

Valeria shifts and sets down the plate. "I've realized how important you are to me, being apart like this." You scowl and burrow under the covers. It took her hurting you deeply to realize this. You didn't have to test out other women to know how you feel. "I don't want to lose you, I love you so much. What I did was a mistake and I will never make it again."

"... Do you think that's all it's going to take to make this better?" You murmur tiredly. You don't have the energy for this. It's on you for getting attached in the first place. You should know better than to believe anything will last forever.

Valeria pauses.

"No," she says. "I don't, but I won't give up on us. I'll right my wrongs, I'll fix this and more." She promises. She brushes her hand over your forehead. "I'll earn your trust and love back, mi vida."

You don't respond. You're not sure you'll ever trust her again. No matter how many apologies she gives you. But you don't think you can leave. Despite what she did your traitorous heart longs for her.

[earthlybeam]

May I request a Glorfindel or Feren with a modern human stuck in middle earth who can’t sleep with it dark. Like back home they have fairy lights and the tv on low? 😅 sorry if requests are closed arent open or you don’t take them I’m new to your blog 😅

Hey there! No worries, I’m totally happy to take requests, and I’m excited to write this for you! 😊 I love the idea of a modern human stuck in Middle-earth, especially with something as relatable as not being able to sleep in the dark. I’ll make sure to incorporate that longing for the little comforts of home, like the fairy lights and low TV. I’ll also give Glorfindel or Feren some cute moments of confusion with these modern items—they’re bound to be curious about those!

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Glrofindel, Feren Version below

☀️𝓖𝓵𝓸𝓻𝓯𝓲𝓷𝓭𝓮𝓵

Glorfindel x Modern Human (You)

The nights in Rivendell were beautiful, almost unbearably so. The stars shone like scattered diamonds across an inky sky, the air was crisp and cool, and the ever-present sound of waterfalls in the distance gave the valley an ethereal quality. For most, it was a paradise—a place of unparalleled serenity. For you, it was anything but. The stillness pressed against you like a weight. Back home, there was always something—a hum of electricity, the faint murmur of the city outside your window, the comforting glow of your fairy lights strung above your bed. Even the soft murmur of a TV playing low in the background was enough to make the night feel less lonely. Here, in Middle-earth, there was only darkness and silence. And though Rivendell’s tranquility was breathtaking during the day, at night it became overwhelming.

You tossed and turned on the plush elven bedding, the softest sheets you’d ever felt, but it didn’t matter. Sleep refused to come. The room was too quiet, too shadowy, too… unfamiliar. You tried closing your eyes, pulling the blanket tighter around you, but the ache of homesickness gnawed at you. You didn’t belong here. The softest knock pulled you from your spiraling thoughts. It was so gentle you thought you might have imagined it. Sitting up, you called out, “Come in.” The door creaked open to reveal Glorfindel. His golden hair shimmered faintly in the moonlight, and the warm concern in his blue eyes was enough to make your chest ache. He stepped into the room with his characteristic grace, carrying a small lantern in one hand and a bundle of books in the other.

“I thought you might need some company,” he said, his voice low but warm. His eyes swept over you, taking in your rumpled blankets and tired expression. “I sensed your unease.” You managed a weak smile, running a hand through your hair. “Yeah, I guess I’m not really used to this.” You gestured vaguely at the room, at the stillness. “It’s… so different here. Back home, I’d have fairy lights, maybe the TV on… something to make it feel less… lonely. It’s stupid, I know.” Glorfindel’s brows furrowed slightly, his confusion evident. He tilted his head slightly, looking as though he had not quite understood. “Fairy lights?” His voice was tinged with curiosity. “What are these?”

You blinked, suddenly realizing that the things you took for granted in your world didn’t exist in his. “Uh, they’re little lights, like tiny bulbs, that glow softly and are usually hung up to make a room feel cozy. Like… decorative lights. You know, for mood lighting?” He looked puzzled, a frown tugging at his lips. “Lights… for mood?” You sighed, trying to explain. “Yeah, kind of. They’re not like regular lights, they’re just to make things look nice. To make it feel… comforting.” Glorfindel’s expression softened slightly, but he still seemed unsure. “I see,” he said slowly, nodding. Then, his gaze shifted, as though he had remembered something. “And this… television? What is that?”

You blinked in surprise. “Oh, right, of course, you wouldn’t know. Um, it’s a screen, like a big box, where people can watch moving pictures and hear voices. It’s like… entertainment. To make the silence less oppressive.” The look on his face was almost childlike in its confusion. “A box… that shows moving pictures?” You chuckled softly, realizing how odd your world must sound to him. “Yeah, I know it sounds weird, but it’s a huge part of how we pass the time, you know? The TV’s always on in the background, and it helps with the quiet. Kind of like… having company.”

Glorfindel looked down at his hands, processing the information. “I think I understand, though it is a strange concept. Moving pictures… in a box?” His lips quirked into a small smile. “I cannot imagine how something so… small, could hold so much.” You laughed softly. “Yeah, well, it’s a lot more complex than it sounds.” He nodded, clearly intrigued by the idea. “But what if… one does not wish to watch such things? What then?” You shrugged, offering him a small, tired smile. “That’s when I’d just leave it on low—kinda like background noise, if that makes sense. Helps me sleep when I feel weird about the dark.” Glorfindel’s gaze softened, as if he truly understood the undercurrent of your words. He moved closer, setting the lantern on the bedside table, its warm glow casting flickering shadows on the walls. “I may not have these ‘fairy lights’ or this ‘television,’ but I can try to ease your unease, mellon nín.”

Before you could say anything, he reached into his tunic and produced a small, crystalline object. It was beautifully cut, gleaming faintly in the lantern’s glow, and you tilted your head in curiosity. “What’s that?” you asked, wondering what he might be planning next. Glorfindel smiled softly, as though pleased by your curiosity. “A crystal of light,” he explained. “We use them in Rivendell for our festivals, and they help to light our way when the moon is hidden. I thought perhaps it might remind you of your… fairy lights.”

He placed the crystal beside the lantern and then murmured a soft phrase in Sindarin. The crystal began to glow faintly, casting a warm, golden light across the room. It wasn’t bright, but the flickering glow was comforting, like the tiny bulbs of your fairy lights. You stared at it, your heart feeling unexpectedly lighter. “How did you…?” He tilted his head slightly, a glimmer of amusement in his eyes. “I may not understand your world completely, but I can try to bring some semblance of it here.” Tears pricked at your eyes, and you quickly wiped them away, embarrassed by how touched you were. “Thank you,” you whispered, your voice thick with emotion.

“There is more,” Glorfindel said, lifting the bundle of books he had brought with him. “You mentioned this ‘television.’ While I cannot provide such a thing, perhaps a story will suffice? A voice, even a humble one, can fill the silence.” You stared at him, incredulous. “You’d really do that?” He chuckled softly, his deep, rich laughter filling the quiet room. “I would. I am in no hurry to sleep, and I find joy in aiding my friends.” Your heart fluttered at his words, and you gave a small, grateful nod. “Alright, then. I’m listening.”

Glorfindel settled into the chair beside your bed, opening the first book—a collection of ancient elven tales, written in both Sindarin and Westron. As he began to read, his voice filled the room—a soothing, melodic tone that wrapped around you like a blanket. The golden glow of the crystal and lantern cast faint shadows on the walls, the light dancing in time with his words. The familiar ache of homesickness began to ebb, replaced by the calm reassurance of his presence. You found yourself focusing less on the strangeness of this world and more on the warmth of Glorfindel’s voice, the subtle inflections and rhythms as he recited the tale of Beren and Lúthien. He read with such care, pausing now and then to glance at you, ensuring you were still comfortable.

The gentle glow of the crystal and the lantern bathed the room in warmth, the shadows no longer pressing in around you. With each word, the familiar ache of homesickness slowly faded away. The sound of his voice, so steady and calming, eased the quiet panic in your chest. As your eyes grew heavier, you caught him murmuring, “Rest well, mellon nín. You are not alone, not while I am here.” For the first time in what felt like forever, you believed him. The faint light, the soothing sound of his voice, and the steady presence of the golden-haired elf beside you were enough to finally ease you into sleep. And as you drifted off, you thought, maybe Middle-earth wasn’t so bad after all.

🤎𝓕𝓮𝓻𝓮𝓷

Feren x Modern Human (You)

You lay in your small room within the heart of Mirkwood, staring up at the dark wooden beams of the ceiling. The air was thick with stillness, broken only by the occasional rustle of leaves from the forest outside. The forest, majestic and ancient, seemed to wrap around you, yet the silence it offered pressed heavily upon your chest. There was no hum of the city streets, no distant buzz of electronics, no gentle noise from people milling about that you could hear back home. Here, in Middle-earth, the quiet was all-encompassing, and you found it suffocating.

Back in your world, you would have had the soft glow of fairy lights lining the windows, twinkling like stars in the night. Their gentle shimmer always made you feel safe. Along with the lights, there would be the calming background noise of a TV on low, a comforting hum as you drifted into sleep. But here, there were no lights to chase away the shadows or the comforting sounds of a familiar world. The dark felt oppressive, as though it had weight, and it seemed to stretch endlessly around you.

A soft sigh escaped your lips as you turned over in bed, trying to get comfortable. The night seemed impossibly long, the darkness creeping into the corners of the room. Even the soft rustling of the leaves outside, which might have been soothing to someone else, only made you feel more alone. You could almost hear the sound of your own heartbeat as you fidgeted beneath the blanket, tossing and turning in frustration. You couldn’t help but feel out of place, like a small speck lost in the vastness of the world.

As if on cue, a gentle knock sounded on your door, and you froze. The door creaked open slowly, and a tall figure stepped inside, blocking the faint light from the hallway. It was Feren, his silhouette tall and graceful against the dim backdrop of the night. “Y/n?” His voice was soft and steady, though there was a note of concern woven in. “I heard you moving about. Is everything well?” You turned toward him, suddenly feeling embarrassed. The last thing you wanted was for him to worry about you. But here, in this strange place, where everything was so different from what you knew, you couldn’t hold it in any longer.

“I… I can’t sleep,” you admitted, sitting up slightly in the bed. “I’m not used to the dark like this. Back home, I always had… lights. You know, like fairy lights? And a bit of noise, like the TV. It’s just too quiet here. I don’t know how to explain it, but I miss that. I miss the little bit of comfort.” Feren raised an elegant brow, his expression puzzled. “Fairy lights?” His voice was tinged with confusion, as if the concept were something from another world entirely. “And… television?”

You chuckled softly, realizing how strange it must sound to him. “Fairy lights are just little glowing lights, like tiny stars you can hang up. They don’t do anything except shine softly to make things feel cozy, to keep the darkness from swallowing everything. And television is… well, it’s like a box that shows moving pictures and makes sounds. It plays stories, music, or sometimes shows that make you feel like you’re not alone.” Feren’s brows furrowed slightly, and you could tell he was trying to piece together what you were saying. “Moving pictures? That sounds wondrous,” he mused, his voice rich with curiosity, “but… strange. And the lights, I think I understand. They chase away the dark, yes?”

You nodded. “Exactly. The lights make the room feel a little more alive. It’s hard to sleep when everything feels so… empty.” Feren looked at you thoughtfully, his gaze softening. “I see. Here, the darkness is not so much a thing to fear as it is a companion to our silence. The night moves with us, like a gentle embrace. The trees sing in the wind, and the creatures of the forest wander beneath the stars. But… I understand now. It is not the same for you. The quiet seems unnatural.” You looked at him, feeling a mixture of relief and gratitude. His willingness to try to understand your discomfort meant more than you could express. “I don’t know how you do it. I just… don’t know how to sleep like this. Without something familiar, without something to hold onto.”

Feren’s eyes softened even further, and he stepped closer to you, his movements graceful and quiet, like the night itself. “Then perhaps I can offer you something from my world,” he said gently. “I do not know of these fairy lights or this ‘television,’ but I know the comfort of the moonlit woods. If you walk with me, in the quiet of the garden, perhaps you will find a peace there. The night may be silent, but it is not without its beauty.”

You hesitated for only a moment, before nodding. “Okay,” you whispered, your voice fragile but willing. “That sounds nice. Just… no sudden noises, okay?” Feren smiled softly, his eyes sparkling in the dim light. “I will be as quiet as the stars themselves.” He led you out into the night, through the grand, winding halls of the Elven palace, until you reached the garden. The air was cool and crisp, but not uncomfortably so. The ground beneath your feet was soft and damp from the evening dew, the earth rich with the scent of pine and earth. The sky was vast, the moon hanging like a pearl in the heavens, casting long shadows on the ground below. The stars were scattered across the sky, bright and steady.

As the two of you walked, Feren’s presence was a soothing balm against the unsettling silence of the forest. There was no need for the hum of artificial lights, no background noise to fill the space. The soft rustle of leaves in the trees, the occasional croon of distant night birds, the subtle movements of creatures hidden in the underbrush—these were the sounds that filled the air, but they were gentle, almost like whispers. Feren’s steps were as quiet as the breeze, and his calm presence beside you was enough to settle the restlessness gnawing at your mind. Occasionally, his gaze would drift toward you, his face illuminated by the soft glow of the moon, his expression warm and understanding.

As you walked beneath the canopy of trees, you felt a surprising sense of comfort, the darkness no longer oppressive but rather a peaceful, enveloping thing. You didn’t need fairy lights or television in this moment; the stillness of the world around you, the quiet company of Feren, were enough. And as you finally returned to your room, you felt a new sense of peace. Maybe, just maybe, the silence wasn’t so bad after all. Feren lingered by the door, looking at you with a soft smile. “Sleep well, Y/n,” he said quietly, his voice like a promise.

You nodded, feeling your body begin to relax. “Thank you, Feren.” And finally, with the comfort of his presence and the quiet beauty of Middle-earth surrounding you, sleep came—sweet, uninterrupted sleep. I’ve tried to enhance the sensory details while preserving the core emotional beats of the original! I hope this version is just what you were hoping for. Would you like me to adjust anything?