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buffyversefanfiction · 5 years

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Felix Fierce (Buffy and Angel Fanfiction) Season 1

Episode 1 - Welcome to The 20s

Warnings: I do not own or claim to own the original content to “Buffy the Vampire Slayer”, “Angel”, the comics or any of the original characters from the “Buffyverse” all rights belong to Joss Whedon.

15 plus, displays of Violence, Gore, Torture and Sexual Innuendos, M/M, F/M, F/F.

Into every generation there was a chosen one until a powerful witch called Willow Rosenberg changed the rules forevermore.

No longer would Buffy Summers stand-alone against the vampires the demons and the forces of darkness.

She was the slayer that changed everything but now it’s his turn.

Felix Fierce found himself running through the woods late at night frantically looking behind him until he found himself crashing into Thorn in full vampire mode, his body hitting against the vampire before he himself fell to the ground.

“Thorn listen this isn’t you.” Felix pleaded as Thorn pulled him off the ground.

“Your right it isn’t that’s kind of the point.” Thorn replied before sinking his teeth into Felix’s neck before Felix suddenly woke up in his bed within his bedroom.

He slowly sat up in his bed before hearing a knock at his door as his father Forest walked into his room.

“I see someone’s finally up I know it’s the holidays and that means allowing my 18 year old son to be as lazy as possible before the new year of school starts but you did promise to chaperone your sister tonight at the New Year’s Eve party.” Forest Fierce reminded his son.

“Dad,” Felix replied as he leaned over to his bedside unit, picking up his phone to check the time. “It’s still morning last time I checked parties happen at night.”

“Yeah but Fyre’s decided she needs to go shopping for an outfit and that’s not exactly my area of expertise.” Forest told him.

“Is this because I’m gay dad?” Felix asked his father.

“No this is because I almost had to take out a second mortgage last time you went on a date with your boyfriend and you decided to buy yourself a whole new wardrobe only to wear something you already.” Forest replied.

“Okay,” Felix yawned. “I see your point but at this point letting me loose with your cards is at your own peril now I’m thinking a new chaperone style outfit is going to need to be bought.”

“Who needs two kidneys anyways?” Forest joked before walking out of Felix’s room and closing the door behind him.

“Great now I’m stuck with my kid sister all day and night.” Felix moaned to himself. “Worst New Year’s ever!”

“Remind me again how I was roped into driving you and Fyre to the shopping mall?” Bryce Kane asked his best friend as he and Felix stood within the store located within Scorchville shopping mall while Fyre was further down the store searching the rails for a New Year’s outfit.

“Because like my sister you both have parties and have left it to the last minute to get an outfit so like the amazing brother and friend I am I agreed to help you both out in this archaic shopping mall that only stays open because of people like you and my sister.” Felix replied.

“Good point,” Bryce agreed. “I do need something other than bland to impress Malerie at her party tonight so let’s just pretend I never moaned to you and I’ve been thankful since the minute we got here.

“Yeah okay Bryce,” Felix laughed at his best friend. “Mercy’s still pissed at you for ditching us tonight so your best keeping me on side at least.”

“Mercy’s still mad?” Bryce asked. “Any ideas on how I can make it up to her?”

“Oh, I’m so not getting involved in a fight between my two best friends.” Felix made himself clear as Fyre walked over to them both holding a somewhat revealing dress in her hands instantly catching her brother’s attention. “Hell, no dad would very much like you to go into the year 2020 with your virginity intact.”

“Felix you’re like an old man it’s almost a new bloody decade let’s not go into it assuming certain outfits make a girl a whore.” Fyre Fierce scolded her older brother. “I mean you dress like a librarian, but I know for a fact you’re not going into the year 2020 with your virginity intact.”

“Well played.” Bryce said with a smile to his best-friend’s younger sister.

“Fine if your going to get bitchy about it you can wear the bloody dress but at least get a cardigan to trick dad with before we leave for the party.” Felix replied, giving into an argument he knew he had no chance of winning.

Fyre quickly walked away from her brother and his best friend and on wards toward the store’s changing room to try on her dress with a victorious smile on her face.

“She is only a year younger than you Felix you need to stop treating her like she’s seven and start realizing she’s seventeen.” Bryce told his friend.

“Here I’m just doing father patrol because dad’s going to be super pissed at her for picking that dress then me for allowing that dress and then she’ll be pissed at dad for being such an old man and then I’ll have to get pissed at dad because he’s pissed at me and before you know it it’s Christmas Armageddon all over again.” Felix explained to Bryce.

“If you think holidays are bad with your family just wait until your dad starts the new year as headmaster at Scorchville High.” Bryce revealed before realizing he slipped up. “Which I wasn’t supposed to mention until after the New Year.”

“You’ve got to be joking me can’t he just stick to teaching at that pompous New York school I mean sure it’s a commute but that comes in handing for sneaking Thorn in and out the house now I’m not even going to be able to sneak about school with him.” Felix complained to his friend. “How the hell did you find out before me anyway?”

“Well I’m captain of the Scorchville Swimmers and Mercy’s is Scorchville High student body president so between the two of us we know everything that goes down in that place.” Bryce revealed. “We were going to tell you, but we couldn’t decide who had to deliver the news and then she stopped talking to me.”

“Well just you wait till I see Mercy because it may just be me blanking the both of you.” Felix warned him. “Now let’s hurry up and find you something because I’m craving coffee.”

Felix and Bryce walked up to the new coffee store/book shop called Scorching Scorchville with a quote underneath the sign saying come in for simply scorching reads and charismatic coffee having dropped Felix’s sister Fyre back off at home after finding her and Bryce outfits for their New Year’s Eve parties.

It was a relatively new store and Felix tended to stick to what he knew best when it came to his caffeinated hot drinks, but he knew his friend Mercy Cole had become obsessed with the place recently and was currently inside meaning it was time to fix things out between her and Bryce but before they even got a chance to step inside they found themselves confronted by Felix’s high school nemesis Rick Star appeared from down the street.

“Well if it isn’t Scorchville’s answer to Ross and Joey.” Rick greeted them with a mocking tone as always. “I bet you guys take naps with each other all the time.”

“Seriously Rick do you just pop up to insult me or do you actually have a life outside of being an archaic school bitch?” Felix snapped back at Rick.

“I’m so glad you can make Malerie’s party tonight I’m sure she’s going to be pleased to see you.” Rick said to Bryce before giving Felix a bitch stare. “Just remember your weird little sidekicks are not on the list.”

“Sidekicks really? Someone really needs to give your side a kick or several.” Felix replied.

“I can’t wait.” Bryce said to Rick, much to Felix’s disapproval as Rick quickly budged past them both and made his way out of sight after turning the street corner. “Why do I have a feeling your pissed with me too?”

“I’m just going to stay focused on the task at hand right now because if I don’t, I may wind up aligning myself with Mercy.” Felix answered Bryce making it clear he wasn’t impressed.

“Malerie has terrible taste in friends but great taste in boyfriends.” Bryce replied trying to justify attending a party with the number one enemy.

“Yeah the jury’s still out on that one.” Felix responded by rolling their eyes.

“Did you really have to bring the traitor with you?” Mercy moaned after Felix and Bryce walked into the coffee shop/bookstore and walked over to her table.

“Play nice Mercy he’s here to apologize.” Felix told her as he sat down opposite his friend.

“I am?” Bryce asked until Felix grabbed a hold of him and forced him to sit down next to him. “Okay I am I’m really sorry.”

“I get the whole rush you seem to be in losing your virginity and I can even somewhat understand why Malerie’s the girl for you, but you’ve not even got a girlfriend yet and your ditching us for her.” Mercy moaned at Bryce.

“Mercy that’s a little harsh don’t you think?” Felix butted in only to get a furious glare from Mercy. “Okay I’m back to being Switzerland over here.”

“Look if it means that much to you, I’ll ditch Malerie’s party and chaperone Fyre with you guys tonight.” Bryce submitted to Mercy’s mood.

“Thank you.” Mercy replied with a smile.

“Okay Switzerland just got switched off for a moment,” Felix couldn’t help but say. “Mercy do you remember our anti-valentines pact last year before I got with Thorn?”

“Not really no, why?” Mercy asked her friend.

“That’s because it only wound up being Bryce and me because you decided to be in a throuple for that long confusing week and we were all like yay go for it because hey it’s something to tick of the list.” Felix defended Bryce. “Bryce has been relentlessly trying to give his virginity to anyone offering and he finally gets a sliver of hope and you’re going to stand in his way?”

“Remind me to remind you never to defend me again.” Bryce told Felix, clearly embarrassed.

“Hey that throuple would’ve worked if they didn’t both fall in love with me the same time, I wound up falling in love with Julien at the same time.” Mercy defended herself before giving in. “But I see your point.”

“So, do I get to go or not?” Asked a confused Bryce.

“Yes, but only because of your dated need to lose your virginity before your 19 if you fall in love with moronic Malerie I may have to disown you.” Mercy warned him.

“Please Malerie’s not going to last a month.” Felix laughed. “Also isn’t it a bit stereotypical to judge someone purely based on their intelligence?”

“When exactly does Switzerland switch back on?” Mercy asked Felix.

“I think Malerie and I have serious potential.” Bryce said in defense of his choice of woman.

“Of course, you do,” Felix mocked his friend while tapping his hand on Bryce’s shoulder before noticing Trix Lance over by the bookstore part of Scorching Scorchville instantly grabbing his attention as he realize she was reading the infamous book with the title Vampyr book. “Here the owner here is very peculiar.”

“I know right? She’s part of the reason I love this place.” Mercy admitted with a smile on her face as she and Bryce joined Felix as they observed Trix reading away within the library like area of the store.

Suddenly Felix began to feel a piercing pain in his head before his eyesight went and all he could see is whiteness before being thrown of his chair much to Mercy and Bryce’s horror as they watched their friend collapse onto the floor.

Felix found himself awaking from the same nightmare he had earlier only this time when he woke up he found himself lying on the floor of Scorching Scorchville after a glass of water was thrown in his face awakening to see Trix, Bryce and Mercy standing over him with Trix holding an empty glass making it clear she was the water culprit.

“See I told you it’s just a perfectly normal teenage collapse you children these days are forever skipping breakfast.” Trix told them all as Bryce and Mercy helped Felix get back onto his feet.

“Are you okay?” Mercy asked her recently conscious friend.

“Yeah clearly just need more carbs or something.” Felix replied to her.

“Are you sure because we could always drop by the hospital and get you checked out?” Bryce suggested.

“Nonsense the boy is perfectly fine you teenagers don’t want to be wasting New Year’s Eve in hospital just because your friend forgot to have breakfast.” Trix said to the three of them.

“Okay lady you seem way too invested in this considering you’re a stranger.” Bryce replied to the blonde-haired store owner.

“Guys I’m fine besides Fyre would literally kill me if I cancelled being chaperone to the party she’s going to.” Felix told Mercy and Bryce, attempting to reassure them both he’s okay.

“What did you see?” Trix asked Felix. “Every time that happens the person always sees something either during it or in a dream the night before.”

“Every time what happens Mrs Lance?” Mercy wondered.

“Fainting of course.” Trix lied to her.

“Okay as interesting as you clearly are, we’ve got a party to chaperone and Bryce has a first date to prepare for.” Felix declared, clearly wanting to get as far away from Trix Lance as possible as something about her made him feel uneasy.

“Very well Felix Fierce enjoy what remains of 2019.” Trix said with a smile before starting to walk away over to the store counter. “I have a feeling 2020 is going to be your year.”

“Hold up how does she know your name?” Bryce asked Felix.

“Beats me.” Felix replied.

“I’m crushing super hard right now!” Mercy admitted as she looked over at Trix with admiration in her eyes.

“So, I’m guessing by the fact your sister was happy when she came home that I’m going to hate her outfit?” Forest asked his son Felix and his son’s friend Mercy as the three of them stood at the bottom of the stairs in the hallway of the Fierce family home waiting for Fyre to grace them with her presence.

“Not half as much as I’m hating you as my new headmaster but if you don’t go all old man on Fyre then I’ll postpone telling her till after the new year.” Felix replied.

“Deal,” Forest gave in reluctantly before telling both Felix and Mercy. “Just make sure she’s always with at least one of you and you all come back here.”

“What are you doing for the new year Mr Fierce?” Mercy asked Felix’s father.

“I’m heading to your parents’ New Year’s Eve party like I do every year it’s a shame none of use will be there this year.” Forest replied to his son’s best friend. “Speaking of which where’s Bryce tonight?”

“He’s at a party where Rick the…” Mercy began to say before quickly changing her words. “Where Rick Star is attending because his soon to be girlfriend Malerie has terrible taste in friends.”

“I still remember the days when you and Rick were inseparable.” Forest said to his son who looked unimpressed with him for reminding him.

“I was friends with Rick before he became a dick.” Felix replied to his father just before Fyre began walking down the stairs in a silky black dress demanding all the attention from the room as she continued to go down the stairs until she was stood next to her father, brother and her brother’s friend.

“Fyre you look as beautiful as ever.” Forest told his daughter before giving her a hug and kissing her on the forehead lovingly.

“When’s Thorn meeting us?” Mercy asked Felix.

“He’s only just finished work so he’s going to meet us at the party once he’s had the chance to get changed.” Felix answered her as Forest broke off his hug with his daughter looking irritated by Thorn’s mention.

“You didn’t tell me Thorn was going to be chaperoning too.” Forest said to Felix in a disapproving tone.

“He is my boyfriend dad and it’s our first new year whether we’re partying or chaperoning or sitting at home doing nothing we’re going to be spending it together.” Felix replied. “Which is probably a good time to mention I invited him over for dinner tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow’s family only.” Forest told his son.

“Does that mean my invite’s revoked because my parents are going to be way too hungover to cook and even if they weren’t, I much prefer your cooking Mr Fierce.” Mercy butted in making it clear she wasn’t going to be uninvited easily.

“Of course, not you and Bryce are extended family.” Forest said sincerely making Mercy smile.

“Dad, if you don’t let Felix have his boyfriend round tomorrow then I’m going to go out tonight find myself a new boyfriend or maybe a couple of boyfriends and get them to gate crash tomorrow’s dinner.” Fyre warned her father.

“Fine,” Forest once again found himself giving into his children’s demands. “I hate when you decide to gang up on me.”

“Why do you hate him so much anyways dad?” Felix asked his dad, clearly annoyed that his boyfriend and father didn’t get along.

“I don’t hate him Felix I’m just not a big fan either.” Forest admitted.

“I guess that just makes tomorrow the perfect timing for everyone to become fans of everyone.” Mercy once again butted in, this time trying to calm the room before Christmas Armageddon had a New Year’s special.

“I don’t know what’s taking him so bloody long it’s our first time seeing the new year in together and he’s running late.” Felix complained to Mercy as the two of them stood within the balcony part of the nightclub The Avenue while looking down at the dance-floor monitoring Fyre who was busy dancing with a group of friends.

“He’ll be here Felix I’m sure he’s got a great reason for showing up late.” Mercy replied, trying to reassure her friend.

“Anything short of him being dead is going to be a hard sell at this point.” Felix told her before he was suddenly nudged accidentally by a man causing him to fall over the railing of the balcony.

Felix fell from the balcony instantly getting everyone’s attention as the entire club looked on in horror and the music stopped only for Felix to land from the long fall on both feet with ease causing everyone to instantly clap and cheer him on.

“How did you just do that?” Fyre asked her brother as she ran over to Felix. “Are you okay?”

“I have no idea,” Felix replied as Mercy began running down the stairs from the balcony to check on her best friend. “I guess I just got lucky.”

“Lucky’s definitely the right word there.” Fyre said before turning to the rest of the club and shouting. “Show’s over get the music going!”

“Despite my death defying stunts how’s your night going sis?” Felix asked his sister as the crowd went back to dancing as the music began playing once more.

“It’s alright except for most of the eye candy being brain farts the intriguing ones being stuck up and me just a girl looking for a new year’s kiss.” Fyre admitted to her older brother as Mercy walked over to them both.

“Are you okay? That was some fall have you been secretly taking in extra gymnastic lessons?” Mercy asked her friend.

“Yeah I’m fine.” Felix reassured Mercy before turning his attention back to his sister. “I’m sure you’ll find someone to kiss for the bells whereas my date seems to be…”

“Here,” Thorn butted in as he appeared from out of the crowd and starting walking towards Felix. “Your date seems to be here and he’s really sorry for being late.”

“Well at least you’re here now.” Felix said to his boyfriend before giving him a kiss on the lips only to feel a strange tingle when he kissed him making him pull a confused face.

“Are you okay?” His boyfriend asked him.

“Yeah it’s just been a long day.” Felix replied.

“You can say that again earlier he fell of a chair fainting and just now he falls off the bloody balcony and lands on both feet.” Mercy revealed to Thorn and Fyre.

“Wait when did you faint?” Fyre and Thorn asked Felix in unison.

“It was nothing,” Felix answered them while giving Mercy a glare. “Definitely not worth talking about.”

“Well I best give you extra attention tonight just in case.” Thorn to his boyfriend before hugging Felix and kissing him on the cheek unknowingly making Felix feel the same strange tingle, this time making Felix’s skin crawl.

“Happy New Year!” Thorn said to Felix as the two now stood at the balcony of the night club, before kissing his boyfriend on the lips after the entire club counted down to the year 2020.

“Happy New Year,” Felix replied after feeling something off with Thorn’s touch once again before kissing him again to see if things still felt off, which it did. “Is everything okay with you Thorn? You seem a little off.”

“I’m fine in fact I was about to say the same to you.” Thorn told him. “How about we go outside and bring in the New Year properly before anyone notices we’re gone?”

Suddenly Felix saw Thorn’s full vampire face appear before his face returned to normal within a blink leaving him even more confused as he was reminded of his earlier nightmare.

“Yeah sure.” Felix answered with uncertainty.

Felix and Thorn quickly made their way out of The Avenue kissing passionately as Felix decided to ignore the weirdness, he experienced leaving it in 2019 before Thorn suddenly threw Felix into the wall with force.

“Thorn what the hell?” Felix asked before being left horrified as Thorn’s face went into vampire mode. “I’m so hating my brain today!”

“Being with you is truly tedious you never stop talking and you and your friends are even worse I think I’ll kill them after killing you.” Thorn cruelly mocked Felix as he walked towards him.

“Thorn what’s wrong with you?” Felix wondered, clearly terrified by Thorn approaching him with a vampire face. “I had this dream before.”

Thorn plunged at Felix who quickly moved to the side before grabbing a hold of his vampire lover lifting his body upwards and slamming him into the brick wall before beginning to make a run for it down the alleyway only for Thorn to start chasing after him.

Felix didn’t get far before Thorn caught up to him as the vampire jumped on his prey making them both fall to the ground Thorn landing on top off Felix with Felix’s back to the ground.

“Don’t worry this will all soon be over.” Thorn promised him.

“Screw you!” Felix shouted before kneeing his lover in the crotch and throwing his body over his head making the vampire land harshly onto the ground as Felix quickly rose to his feet.

Thorn wasted no time in getting back on his feet and charging towards Felix again who quickly kick Thorn in the stomach before using his other foot to climb up his body kicking the vampire in the face before black flipping back into the same spot where he delivered a punch straight to Thorn’s stomach making Thorn crash to the ground once more.

“You’re a vampire.” Felix finally realized as Thorn once again stood back up.

“This isn’t over slayer.” Thorn promised before turning around and making a run for it as Felix suddenly heard a clapping sound only to turn around to see Trix Lance standing before him with a lit cigarette in hand.

“Preferably slayers stake the vampire, but I suppose that wasn’t a terrible first time I’ve heard of worst.” Trix said to him while taking a draw from her cigarette as Thorn was now out of sight. “But next time you go up against a vampire you should probably kill them.”

“He’s a vampire and I’m a slayer,” Felix began to understand. “I’ve heard stories I mean who hasn’t, but I didn’t think any of it was real.”

“Vampires, werewolves, trolls, ogres…the list goes on.” Trix revealed as she threw her cigarette to the ground and stubbed it out with her heels. “All of them are real.”

“I want to argue the reality of it all but I literally survived a fall without a scratch and I just fought with my vampire boyfriend who I guess now is my ex.” Felix replied to the blonde haired store owner as he walked towards her. “My only question is who are you?”

“Bellatrix Lance, your new watcher from the newly established Watchers Academy founded by Rupert Giles.” Trix admitted to her slayer. “We should probably start discussing your training.”

“Wow,” Felix said in shock. “Welcome to 2020 Felix Fierce.”

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kiruuuuu · 6 years

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Siege The Valentines 2019 Day 1

Blitz/Rook oneshot in which Rook would like to have sex and Blitz doesn’t. So they compromise and have sex. (Rating E, fluff/humour, explicit smut, some exhibitionism and semi-public sex, ~8.5k words)

Thank you so much to everyone at @dualrainbow for organising this event!! I’m thrilled to participate and look forward to everyone’s contributions :) Please follow @dualrainbow so you don’t miss a day and let writers know if you enjoyed their story! 💕

“You should’ve seen me, I drop kicked one of them down the stairs and actually made him do a flip, a bloody flip, I bet none of you have ever seen anyone do that, it was brilliant! Much cooler than the way I made five of them curse like all hell when I set off one of my babes, and that was already -”

“I think my favourite moment of yours was when you were currently telling me about how much you needed a piss, so much that you considered just dipping out for a second to do it in the middle of a mission and one of the blokes burst into the room. You shrieked like a child, my ears are still ringing.”

Smoke shoots Mute a glare when the younger Brit’s comment earns more laughs than his dramatic exaggeration of the events transpired earlier, but an arm casually slung around his waist placates him instantly. Blitz can only imagine how he feels in his lover’s half-embrace, pressed against a warm body and so obviously claimed in front of everyone – he’d bet it’s nice, has felt a similar sensation before, confidence and affection settling low in his stomach and weighing him down in a good way. A quick glance over to a certain Frenchman assures him that Rook is following a similar tale as well, eyes bright and mouth stretched into a rapt grin while he listens to Maestro. He’s almost cute like this, enthusiastically poses additional questions to allow the Italian to flesh out the story, and Blitz knows what it feels like to have all his attention.

Okay, he’s understating. Rook is adorable. If he could, he’d hug him right now and kiss the tip of his nose. Maybe tell him how happy his entire existence makes him.

“You’re the one babe I never have to set off, you do that all by yourself”, Smoke is grumbling now after Mute once more rained on his boisterous parade, prompting his boyfriend to laugh and his hold to tighten.

They’re loitering outside their hotel – since drinking alcohol in the lobby isn’t permitted, they’ve gathered here to share their post-mission hyperactivity. Their group must make for an intimidating picture, around twenty well-built men and women congregating, sharing cans of beer and raucous laughter, but as long as nobody chases them away, they’ll stay. There’s no alternative really: they’d go insane in their individual rooms, with some of them probably taking apart the furniture due to cabin fever, and going out isn’t preferred either. Because rarely anyone would understand the rush of having saved lives, and they want to ride the high for just a little longer. It won’t be long until exhaustion sets in.

Blitz can feel the tension slowly leaving his muscles but instead of rendering him immobile, it makes him giddy. He barely resisted the urge to join Finka in her spontaneously made up drinking game of having to take a sip whenever any of them curses in their mother tongue (and by now, she and various others are very tipsy) and it’s getting more and more difficult to not just run, tackle someone for a friendly wrestling match or try to scale a building – though the glass façade of their hotel would make this last one impossible without the proper equipment.

“Have I ever told you that you’re fucking awesome at your job?”, Ying addresses Hibana with a reverent expression which speaks not only of her admiration for the other woman but also of the fact that she’s by far the worst of them in holding her liquor.

“Only six times today”, the Japanese woman replies with a both flattered and amused grin. “You’re talking about me saving your life again earlier? It’s becoming a running joke at this point.”

Ying puffs herself up in front of her, almost like a small bird trying to seem more intimidating and stabs her in the collarbone with a finger to emphasise every word coming out of her mouth. “I. Love. Your. Controlled. Explosions.”

“Sounds like she’s setting off a controlled explosion in your panties”, Ash butts in drily and amid the chortles and chuckling, Blitz’ eyes meet Rook’s.

It’s a relatively mild night for the season but even the beers he had don’t really explain the sudden rush of heat overcoming him. Not for the first time does he realise just how gorgeous the other man really is with his dark curls and bright blue eyes, his physique oddly attractive even to someone who preferred softer curves all his life. It probably has to do with almost dying – death puts a lot of things into perspective. Cheeks hot, he offers a warm smile and nearly crushes the can in his hand when it’s reciprocated, so pleased is he, before averting his eyes again. He feels like an open book but would prefer for no one to read him right now.

Maybe he should drink some water to clear his mind a little, guide his restless state towards something more productive. He’s got some bottled water in his hotel room, so he excuses himself from no one in particular as everyone is currently cheering on either Ash or Hibana in their battle of wits while Ying seems a tad confused with the entirety of the universe.

The moon is mirrored in the spottily illuminated glass front of the building and Blitz is so mesmerised by it that he only notices he’s gained a companion when he enters the lobby and Rook slips in with him.

“What are you doing?”, the young man wants to know cheerfully and seems barely capable of containing his excess energy.

“Getting some water. I hate travelling with a hangover and we’re leaving tomorrow.”

“I’ll come with!” The announcement is followed by Rook dancing alongside him, basically running laps around him and bouncing in place as they wait for the elevator. More than ever he reminds Blitz of a puppy. “Did you hear what Maestro said? Apparently Lesion lost the bet with James and now he has to get an undercut, can you imagine how silly he’s going to look, probably almost as bad as the time Gus had to -”

His chatter lulls Blitz in who’s more than happy to let Rook do the talking and simply indulge him, but he was not at all prepared for the tongue which pries his lips open and shoves its way into his mouth as soon as the elevator doors close behind them. He makes a surprised noise and stumbles back yet Rook merely follows him, presses their bodies together and continues ravishing him. Having no other choice, Blitz succumbs and kisses back tentatively, smiling at the desperate sound he earns in return and putting his arms around his lover.

Rook is a needy disaster whenever he feels he’s been neglected for too long and so it’s no surprise when he mumbles: “I haven’t kissed you all day.” His pout is audible but at least he detaches when they arrive on Blitz’ floor, trailing after him with a whine.

“Well, we had a few situations to de-escalate”, Blitz reminds him gently while unlocking his door. “If you want, we can cuddle a bit before going to bed, but you’re sleeping in your own room.” Rook perks up at this and were he really a dog, he’d probably wag his tail at Mach 3 right now. As expected. “That’s not a euphemism. I’ll be too tired for anything else.”

And here comes the ear droop – also as expected. “But -”

He feels bad. He really does, he hates disappointing people and disappointing Rook even more and he’d be lying if he claimed the quick and dirty kiss in the elevator had no effect on him, but… there’s other issues. Unaddressed ones, entirely his own fault, he knows this, and yet he couldn’t bring himself to raise the topic yet. “Come on in and we can make out for now”, he suggests instead and Rook is immediately full of life again.

The room itself is remarkably pleasant even if cramped, the carpet fluffy, the bed just the right kind of hard and the floor to ceiling windows a nice touch. Blitz turns the light on, gives Rook a peck on the lips to appease him for the moment and draws the heavy curtains closed before rummaging around in his backpack for his sparkling water. Rustling behind him causes him to turn around curiously and he’s faced with -

“Julien!”

Rook pauses uncertainly, blinking at him like someone who got caught doing something forbidden yet not sure what exactly. He’s half way in taking off his shirt while his trousers are unbuttoned already, his shoes kicked off to the side and his toes trying to find purchase on the hem of his trouser leg so he can pull it off as well. If his intent hadn’t been crystal clear, he’d look comical. “Is this not what we’re doing?”, he wants to know, sheepish, and once more reminds Blitz of a dog – only this time a mindlessly horny one.

“Making out also wasn’t a euphemism”, he stresses firmly and he knows this look all too well, has received it several times after dates and in the morning and even at work but … he can’t. He can’t give in, no matter how much it pains him to turn down these wide, dejected eyes.

“It’s been so lonnng”, Rook whines and shuffles over to him, listlessly throwing his arms around Blitz and crowding him against the nearest wall. A quick look confirms that yes, there’s no gap in the curtains meaning none of their colleagues still outside can see them, so Blitz relaxes and pulls his boyfriend close to him, finally enjoying a hug that, while being slightly uncomfortable due to the arms digging into his back, feels utterly wonderful. “And you’re always so handsome, it’s not fair. Your helmet hair is cute and when you’re being modest it’s adorable and you know I love it when you drink out of a can wrong.”

The ticklish words grumbled against the exposed skin on the side of his neck make him laugh softly and card his hand through Rook’s silky hair. “You know there’s no wrong way to drink out of a can?”

“There is. And you’ve perfected it just to taunt me. Have I told you that these jeans make your ass look amazing?”

It’s good that Rook can’t see his reddening face – Blitz is weak to heartfelt compliments and he knows he can take Rook’s seriously. “You’re really pent up at this point, hm?” Another pleading whine is enough of an answer. “I can just… take care of you, how about that?”

To his genuine astonishment, Rook declines. “I want to make you feel good too, mon cœur, or else it’s no fun.” He does belatedly accept the offer of making out, however, simply presses their lips together and purrs against Blitz’ mouth. He gives in without hesitation, always does so when they’re alone, whether it’s early in the morning, amidst frantic preparations to go to work, during a film they’re watching or as a prolonged good night kiss. Rook thoroughly enjoys kissing in all circumstances and is slowly winning Blitz over as well, not only with his eagerness but also because he’s excellent at it.

Rook does the thing which always makes his toes curl and he can feel himself melting into the devoted ministrations speaking of an affection he reciprocates wholeheartedly. He’s gotten worryingly attached to this man in a relatively short amount of time, willingly allowed him into his life and doesn’t even object to spending most of their nights together – but there are still some obstacles in the way, moments during which one of them is left staring blankly or unsure of what to say, awkward situations and slight hurt, often mutual. All in all it’s considerably less rocky than most of Blitz’ previous relationships or attempts thereof, and still he’s painfully aware it’s far from perfect. He doesn’t mind though, they’re both putting in the effort to make it work and it shows.

The beer he drank is only a very small part of the reason why Blitz enthusiastically toys with Rook’s tongue as soon as it becomes available: he’s missed this too. Letting himself go isn’t something he’s done often but Rook coaxes him out of his shell with loving touches, understanding reassurances and very uncharacteristic patience every time. The longer they kiss, the steamier it gets, and he really should’ve seen this coming. Rook has… a remarkable libido, as he’s come to realise, and it’s much too easy to allow him to take the lead, especially since he always ensures Blitz gets whatever his heart (or rather his crotch) desires, and why has Blitz been this reluctant again?

He’s drawing a blank now, the wet sounds of their sloppy making out just as distracting as the way Rook subtly grinds against him, full of hope and need. The Frenchman is groaning into Blitz’ mouth, running his tongue over his teeth and simultaneously massaging his ass, always moving, almost writhing against him while he systematically takes apart all of Blitz’ composure. It’s only a kiss, yes, but what a kiss it is – dizzying, with no opportunity to breathe freely, a merciless onslaught of sensation and Blitz feels like he’s seventeen again, snogging his crush for the very first time. His knees are getting weak, his eyelids heavy enough so he never wants to lift them again, and more and more of his focus wanders to his lower half, this one place where he’d like to feel all of Rook, preferably right now.

They’re not even undressed. Rook hasn’t even said anything, and Blitz already is as flustered as if he had three fingers inside and it really has been a while, hasn’t it? It’s not his lack of desire for his boyfriend which held him back, not at all, if anything he’s been exceedingly tense and trying not to keep glancing at Rook whenever he was working out or smiling or having unruly hair or really just there, and this definitely isn’t helping. He’s thinking about it now, Rook over, under, behind, inside him, and he loves it all.

Rook knows what he’s doing, knows how susceptible Blitz is to his kisses and so he’s made use of them as a distraction to sneak his hands under Blitz’ shirt, running them over heated skin as he slowly nibbles and sucks and licks Blitz’ inhibitions out of him. And then, suddenly, he rolls one of his nipples between gentle fingertips. The unexpected spike of pleasure is too much, entirely too much, and Blitz can’t help but moan, just allow this loud noise to escape his throat as if it had any justifiable reason to exist, and simultaneously panics.

“No”, he whispers and twists away from the offending hand, “stop, stop.”

Immediately, Rook pauses and withdraws a little, the troubled look on his face only increasing Blitz’ guilt. “I’m sorry. Is everything alright?”

“Yes, but give me a minute. Okay?” His words come slow, his mind still trying to catch up. Rook nods, visibly trying hard not to let his disappointment show, and rests his forehead on Blitz’ shoulder, pants softly against his collarbone and keeps holding him close. He’s given away by movement further down, his prominent erection straining against his underwear in the exposed triangle between the hem of his t-shirt and his open zip. It’s -

It looks really inviting. It looks like something Blitz needs to touch or even lick and holding back is surprisingly difficult. He pictures himself sinking to his knees and taking care of it, guiding Rook’s tentative thrusts and yes, he could do that, it’d be fine as long as he doesn’t touch himself which is getting harder by the second, pun fully intended.

“Do you want me to -” He kisses soft hair and brushes his knuckles over the rigid shaft, earning a gasp and another twitch. “I can just satisfy you. That’d be okay.”

The aqua blue eyes directed at him are full of defeat. “Why not more, mon cœur? We have the time, and we don’t need to do anything exhausting. Am I doing something wrong? Don’t you like having sex with me anymore?”

Blitz feels his face warming up once more. “It’s the opposite, rather. That’s the problem.” He would prefer not to talk about it at all until he’s found a solution by himself but he supposes he owes Rook at least this much.

Only it looks that all he’s doing for right now is thoroughly confusing him. “You like it too much? What do you mean?”

The words don’t really want to come out right, warped by insecurity and self-consciousness. “It’s… embarrassing.”

“What is?” Rook has momentarily forgotten about their state, tilting his head inquisitively and hell-bent on making Blitz spell it out for him, apparently.

“When we – you know, then I’m…” He makes a meaningful pause, hoping that Rook gets it on his own, but is merely met with more bewilderment. He must be crimson by now. “I’m too loud. Okay? I’m just – it’s awkward. I can’t hold back and I don’t like it.”

Astonishment morphs into complete and utter lack of understanding. “What?”

“It’s embarrassing”, he reiterates to really drive the point home but it seems that this isn’t where Rook’s mind is refusing to cooperate.

“It’s incredibly hot!”, his lover shoots back with passion. “No, really, you have no idea how much it turns me on, I love it. Please don’t even try to hold yourself back, it’s my favourite thing.”

Oh.

“But you’re much quieter.”

“Yeah, so I can hear you better.”

Oh. Blitz ponders this new revelation. He supposes that Rook does indeed let himself go if it’s only him being stimulated, yes, now that he thinks about it. “I just thought it wouldn’t -”

“Wait, is that the reason you didn’t want to have sex recently?” Oops. And there it is.

Sheepishly, he replies: “Maybe?”

“So I didn’t do anything wrong? You still want me to sleep with me? You were just embarrassed because you moaned during sex?”

“Well, when you put it like that, it sounds silly”, Blitz protests weakly but ultimately, he has no leg to stand on. Quite literally, too, because Rook wordlessly picks him up and carries him until the mattress digs into the back of his knees.

“You have no idea how relieved I am”, Rook murmurs into the side of his neck and Blitz belatedly realises that the questions he posed weren’t rhetorical but genuine, he did want to make sure there wasn’t another unaddressed issue between them holding Blitz back. “And how pissed off.”

That’s fair, Blitz thinks. He’s still not wholly comfortable with the idea of giving himself up like this, of allowing Rook to assume total control over his body but he trusts him nonetheless. Knowing that Rook doesn’t mind, quite the opposite, is a reassurance he apparently needed, and so he wraps himself around his boyfriend and mumbles an apology.

“It’s alright, mon cœur, but if you hold yourself back now, I’m gonna fuck you so slowly you’ll end up begging.” And before he can react to this announcement in any way, Rook has shoved him onto the bed already, crawling on top of him and once again claiming his mouth, only this time the goal doesn’t seem to be seducing Blitz but rather silencing him – now that Rook knows there’s technically nothing speaking against them having sex, he’ll be unrelenting.

His mouth is merciless and so are his hands, roaming Blitz’ torso freely, rubbing him into a pleasant daze and lulling him into a false sense of security because it doesn’t stop, none of it, neither the deep kisses nor the fingertips digging into his skin and when Rook rolls his hips against his, he’s surprised at how hard both of them are nonetheless. They move up on the bed, stretching out on it while Rook suckles on his lower lip contentedly, fumbling with Blitz’ buttons.

“Shouldn’t we go back?”, Blitz gasps. “The others -”

It’s a weak excuse and both of them know it, he’s actually amazed Rook even graces him with a reply. “- won’t care, if they even notice at all. Gilles and Dom disappeared a while ago too and no one wondered about them.”

They’re definitely not doing anything like this though, Blitz wants to object but groans instead when a hand dives into his briefs and wraps around his erection. He’s momentarily stunned by how fantastic it feels to have someone else’s hand on his dick, lazily stroking up and down and squeezing the head lightly, prompting another strangled noise from him. The fierce pleasure rushes through him and erodes his sanity in a very familiar way – if he’s going to stop this at all, he has to do it soon.

“I don’t have any lube here”, he pants, desperate and his self-control waning.

The fond, adoring look this earns him makes it brilliantly clear that there really is no escape. “Mon cœur, you can’t honestly think I’d ever be unprepared for spontaneous sex”, Rook tells him gently and pulls a small bottle out of his pocket triumphantly. “Take your clothes off, will you?”

And Blitz admits defeat. He does want this, painfully so, but cringes whenever he lets out a sound he deems too loud regardless. And for some reason he has the impression that Rook is going to enjoy teasing him immensely.

Following Rook’s order turns out more complicated than he thought because the Frenchman chases after every piece of clothing with his lips, peppers any newly exposed skin with ticklish kisses and makes Blitz giggle in the process. Unlike Rook’s previously almost frantic displays of affection, he’s much more playful now, bites at Blitz’ calves until he threatens to throw him off the bed and sucks dark red marks onto his thighs. It’s oddly calming, the uncomfortable tension between them has dissipated and given way to mutual desire and passion which is a relief to Blitz also – he hates nothing more than disappointing people, and repeatedly worming his way out of something he genuinely enjoys were it not for that Small Detail wasn’t easy. Rook really must’ve worried.

“Can I make it up to you somehow?”, he offers while helping his lover out of his clothes, feeling his muscles and strong legs while doing so. He can’t help but admire his body – he’s beautiful with and without clothes, only he doesn’t get to see him naked nearly enough. Their hard work and training indubitably pays off and Rook is the best example with the pronounced muscles adorning him.

“You can moan like a whore for me”, the younger man supplies cheerfully.

“Julien.”

“Have I ever told you that you sound like my old teacher when you do that?” He catches sight of Blitz’ horrified expression and hurries to amend: “No, don’t worry, I like it. You don’t need to stop doing it.”

“You know, somehow that doesn’t make it any better.” Rook chuckles in response while ridding himself of his socks and then takes his usual place between Blitz’ spread legs, beaming at him expectantly. “Isn’t there anything else you’d like to do?” The question is dangerous. He made the mistake of granting Rook a blank cheque before and ended up sobbing into a pillow as he came so hard he got some in his hair, but right now they’re coming down after a tense mission, they don’t have all evening and Rook is missing most of his ‘equipment’ anyway. What’s the worst that could happen?

Rook contemplates the offer for a moment while touching Blitz’ stiff member, massaging the tip gently, then his scrotum, then even further down. It’s distracting despite its absent-minded nature and he finds himself lifting one of his legs to grant better access already. Noticing the subconscious gesture, Rook shoots him a smile and presses against his perineum, repeating the gesture when Blitz bites his lip at the pleasant sensation. “I’d like a certain position and a certain location. Here in this room though, don’t worry.”

Sounds easy enough. If he’s honest, it sounds entirely too easy, but gift horses and so on. Maybe Rook is happy with a little bit of experimentation, and besides, even if he wants to do something like bending Blitz over the desk, it’ll be fine. More than fine. Maybe… maybe he should bring up this suggestion himself at a later point in time. “Alright. I’m okay with that.”

“You’re the best”, Rook announces, full of giddy anticipation, and leans down to engulf the head of Blitz’ cock with his lips.

The sudden gesture makes him jump first and inhale sharply second, not expecting to be encased in moist heat this abruptly, but adapting to it is made easy by a skilled tongue swiping over sensitive flesh. Reflexive protest turns into a content sigh as Rook demonstrates exactly why Blitz allowed him to do this very thing to him at work once – no one cared what they were doing anyway, they were both bored and Rook side-eyed him and the rest is pretty messy history. The Frenchman is not only ridiculously skilled at this though, no, it’s also made better by the mischievous twinkle in his eyes whenever he gazes up to Blitz as well as the brown mane he can hold on to.

He’s serious from the start, allowing the glans to glide over his lips a few times as he bobs his head shallowly, then swallows more, goes deeper with each motion, sucking hard on every upwards pull. Within seconds, Blitz is reduced to a panting mess over the unforgiving stimulation, digging his one heel into the mattress and flexing his toes on both feet, almost shying away from the intense feeling. His breathing turns ragged, irregular, as he alternates between squeezing his eyes shut to focus on the lips tight around him and raptly watching Rook slide up and down like a true professional.

It only gets worse once his lover has snapped the cap open and poured some of the lube he inexplicably carried around with him onto his fingers, because he very practically-oriented doesn’t waste any time before pushing one of them into Blitz and that’s the moment he has to slap a hand over his mouth. Because if he thought Rook couldn’t be any more ruthless, he’s sorely disappointed when a fingertip rubs directly over his sweet spot.

Rook is very versatile concerning a lot of things, not only at work – he adapts easily to those around him and seems to fit in anywhere, and even in bed he’s eager to switch things up now and then, go with the flow, read Blitz’ mood and act accordingly. They’ve had evenings filled with languid kisses, almost lazy orgasms and copious amounts of cuddling, just like they had moments where everything was over and done with in less than five minutes. Right now, Blitz is still vaguely weightless from their earlier collective success and, now that they’ve at least acknowledged his issue, ready for a slow and thorough session.

Unlike Rook. Very unlike Rook, if how he’s currently sucking the life out of Blitz while abusing his prostate in the most wonderful way is any indication. He feels even more vulnerable now, being invaded by a slippery digit and trying to relax into the sensation, yet need is pulling his body taut and hindering him. Having Rook inside him still hasn’t lost its magic, especially not when he’s paying close attention to Blitz’ reactions as he is now, crooking his finger over and over as if he’s beckoning him to come, motioning for him to come closer and closer – and that’s exactly what Blitz is doing, still not allowing himself to make a noise but quickly running out of oxygen.

Distractedly, he notices that he’s almost lifting off the mattress due to the need thrumming through him and, abruptly, it hits him that he really is about to climax. Panicked, he pushes Rook away, nearly tripping over the edge when his cock is released with a wet pop, and is instantly rewarded with a half-lidded gaze and lips shining with spit. Breathing heavily, he gasps: “No more. I’m – I’m almost there.”

There’s an almost malicious glint in Rook’s eyes now. “Try not to come then, I’ll be fucking you regardless”, he responds, quite obviously feeling vengeful and deservedly so. Blitz opens his mouth in protest but merely draws a deep breath when a second finger joins the first, stretching him in preparation. Sinking back into the sheets, he accepts his fate which, admittedly, is more than bearable. He enjoys this part anyway, not only because Rook does but also because his lover, as with many things in this domain, is exceedingly skilful. Despite expecting it to, being entered never hurt and Blitz knows better than to take any credit for it.

Impatiently, he pushes against the fingers, grinds into them and hums at every shock of want hitting him out of nowhere. Without the added stimulation to his dick, it’s manageable, his mind blissfully empty and a dreamy smile on his face as he drifts away on the ebb and flow and then – then Rook swallows him again. Just the head for now, but it doesn’t matter because it feels divine and fantastic and holy shit what is he even doing; Blitz forgets how to breathe for a second, catapulted right back to the edge with how hard Rook is sucking but doesn’t tip over, teeters and looms but doesn’t fall.

It takes him a few moments before he can identify this heavenly sensation: Rook is tonguing the underside of the head, directly over one of Blitz’ most sensitive spots – as he very well knows. Apart from that, he’s not moving, simply rubbing over it again and again, just like with his prostate and it’s obvious what he wants to achieve at this point. But Blitz isn’t giving in. No matter how fucking magnificent it feels, he refuses to let out more than minuscule whimpers, even if Rook keeps this up… which he can, without much effort really. And actually does.

Blitz ends up trembling, trapped between an insistent tongue and deft fingers, both of which have his own hands twitching and overwhelming want taking priority over all. He’s extremely close to just getting rid of the brunet between his legs and jerking himself off but this, too, would be admitting defeat – so he endures, eyes watering, teeth clenched, abs tensing. And Rook seems to be having the time of his life. Even more so when he reaches up, his free hand slowly gliding over Blitz’ hips, his ribs, towards -

All he can do is watch in horror as fingers slowly close on his nipple but something for which he was even less prepared is Rook swallowing him whole as soon as he pinches, and the throaty moan that follows couldn’t have been held back no matter what. “My love”, Blitz whines and hears another strangled noise leave his lips while Rook makes sure he hits the back of his throat on every bob, “please, don’t – Julien – I’m so close. Oh God.” It’s too much, Rook is scissoring his fingers now, pinching harder, moving faster, and he really is just about to orgasm, he can taste it, the tingling starting in his crotch and working its way outwards to his limbs…

And Rook stops again. This time, he ceases all stimulation, withdraws both hands, sits up and licks his lips with a satisfied grin. The air is cool on wet skin and Blitz feels himself throb, feels his hole pulse and has to make an effort to see straight. If, in certain moments, his lover feels a fraction of the ferocious desire currently tugging at Blitz’ limbs, he can’t blame him for being perpetually aroused. Rook is a God and Blitz wants to worship him the only way his brain is allowing him to consider right now.

“Come on”, he pleads quietly, reaching for his boyfriend, “come on, Julien, don’t make me wait.”

The impish smirk transforms into a devoted smile and Rook leans down for a tender but quick kiss. He’s not unaffected, as his rock hard erection betrays him, but he’s certainly more composed than Blitz. “I love you”, he murmurs against his lips before climbing off the mattress, holding out a hand. “Get up. We’re doing it while standing.”

Easier said than done, his legs probably don’t feel like rubber. Blitz crawls to the edge of the mattress and lets Rook help him up, then sways unsteadily in place, much to his boyfriend’s amusement. His lower half is still throbbing viciously, demanding release or at the very least more stimulation, and coherent thought is nigh impossible in this state. Uncomprehending, he watches as Rook turns off the light and then fumbles his way to the large windows, drawing the curtains back and letting pale moonlight in.

“Come here”, he says with a grin and Blitz understands.

“Julien.”

“They can’t see you like this.”

“Julien, no.”

“You promised.”

He did promise. Not explicitly, but he agreed to Rook’s terms and this is apparently what they are: fucking him against a full length window. He should’ve noticed this loophole and is grateful that he at least killed the lights or else all their colleagues outside would’ve gotten mooned by Rook’s really quite marvellous ass. He thinks about it. The façade is dark enough, he certainly couldn’t look into any of the darkened rooms.

As he approaches, face burning, Rook’s outstretched arm curls around his midsection and creates a protective barrier between Blitz’ body and the cool glass in front of him. He’s manoeuvred between Rook and the window, facing the outside, and forces himself not to look down at all the people he knows, instead focuses on Rook pressing himself against his back and kissing his shoulder, heavy erection slipping between his cheeks and rubbing over his quivering ring of muscle which is more than ready to receive it.

“I’ve always wanted to do this”, Rook divulges with a chuckle. “It’s going to be so hot when you shoot against the window, mon cœur.”

None of what he’s saying helps to put Blitz at ease but since his body is still in horny mode, he’s incapable of refusing Rook anything. “This is terrible”, he states and flinches when the tip of his dick touches the cold surface, shoves his hips against Rook’s.

“Just relax. And remember that no one can see you.” In the second it takes Rook to lube up his own cock, Blitz contemplates his life choices but gets rudely interrupted when Rook pushes his legs apart a little further. Knowing what’s about to happen, Blitz shuts his eyes so all his attention is concentrated on the glorious sensation of Rook entering him from behind – the first stretch is mind-numbing and feels endless, but once the head has slipped in, it’s just a matter of filling up his insides; every centimetre pushes more air out of his lungs until Rook bottoms out with a blissful moan. They stay mostly still for a few elating seconds during which Blitz can’t help but reach between his legs, fondle Rook’s balls and make him twitch deep inside repeatedly, something that always sends waves of pleasure rolling through him.

Rook fills him out so perfectly as if they were made for each other but he’s still in a pitiless mood: once Blitz has nodded and thus given him the signal to move, he withdraws almost all the way before slamming back in, repeating the process when it yields another broken sound from Blitz. He loves when Rook does this, when his hard thrusts reach deep but don’t come so fast as to numb his insides with overstimulation – like this, he feels every centimetre sliding in and out keenly, almost stumbles and staggers each time Rook hits his prostate. The angle is unfair, the fact that he has to endure this while standing merciless and Rook’s lustful moans directly into his ear lacking any compassion. He’s going to be ruined.

First, he needs recover his balance, he’s dizzy and only getting worse with every burst of pleasure exploding behind his eyelids, every hard impact, so he steadies himself against the windowpane. The smooth glass is icy to the touch and only reminds him of how scorchingly hot Rook is, how the hands holding on to Blitz’ hips set him ablaze, Rook’s breath on the back of his neck as hot as his body, radiating heat and making Blitz sweat. A particularly vicious thrust hitting all the right spots forces another moan out of him but so far he’s been good, suppressed a lot more… but why is he holding back?

Rook is living out a fantasy of his right now, and he’s making no effort to hide it – already his movements are becoming irregular and the endless stream of noises falling from his lips is unselfconscious. He’s utterly lost in the moment and has no qualms about letting Blitz know, allowing him to hear just how good he feels, how much he’s enjoying himself. He’s so… honest and open.

The moment Blitz moans his lover’s name, Rook almost loses his rhythm. He stumbles a little, obviously surprised, but when Blitz does it again, Rook echoes it with a similar groan of his own. He curses heartily and increases the speed at which he drives into Blitz, simultaneously hugging him tightly so he can’t go as deep but neither of them care. If he could see his reflection, Blitz bets that the other man would be smiling.

It’s astonishingly easy. Once Blitz has gotten accustomed to channelling the intense pleasure into mewls and whines and gasps, it happens all by itself, genuine reactions to Rook’s thorough fucking – and it’s liberating, strangely enough, heightens his lust where before he robbed himself of this, diminished it through his misplaced embarrassment. He feels more naked than before, probably also due to the fake sense of exposure the glass before him gives off, but it’s fine because Rook holds him, a reliable strong body keeping him upright and causing more and more pulsing need. He’s ecstatic.

Wanting more, needing to feel Rook even more sharply, Blitz pushes his hips back once again, changing their stance slightly to break the embrace but allow Rook deeper penetration which turns out to be one of the best ideas he’s ever had. His hands scrabble for purchase against the cool window but find none, so he squishes the side of his face against it instead, every hard thrust dragging his skin against the glass and every breath of his fogging it up yet it’s perfect like this. Rook’s motions are almost frantic now, getting worse whenever Blitz moans a yes or oh fuck and he can’t blame him, he does sound increasingly lewd.

His thighs are shaking by now from the exertion, his body covered in a sheen of sweat and his brain long bidden farewell. All he can do is idly wonder why he ever leaves the Frenchman out of his sight, why he would ever say no to any of his suggestions when he ends up feelings this fucking amazing each time. A hand wraps around his shaft, making him groan and instinctively clench around Rook’s cock, heightening the gratifying sensations with which it graces him.

“Imagine they could actually see you like this”, Rook whispers into his ear and increases the tempo, ramps up the intensity even more, the thought quite obviously exciting him. And Blitz does, he does imagine it, pictures what he looks like right now – rosy cheeks, face flattened and palms uselessly pressed against the window, lower half pushed towards Rook to allow for deep thrusts, swollen cock happily dripping clear liquid as it bobs along to the rhythm at which he’s being entered. He’s fine with showing his boyfriend this side of his since it goes both ways, he’s seen Rook squirming in ecstasy below him before. But he’d rather not share either of these displays with anyone else.

By now, his legs are threatening to give in despite the iron hold around his hips. His pleasure never really declined as he didn’t recover from Rook’s spectacular blow job earlier, and so he’s been high-strung this entire time, the relentless stimulation of his prostate in this position only contributing to the roaring lust. Feeling a fist around his dick now leaves him reeling and he pushes into it mindlessly, moves back and forth between Rook’s hot flesh and his merciful hand promising sweet release, his desire building and building, working towards the crescendo -

Rook plunges deep into him a few times more and he’s gone. He barely stops himself from folding in half at the sudden, concentrated pleasure hitting him and moans with abandon, moans to accompany every motion fucking his orgasm out of him, moans for the way Rook massages his dick, moans at each violent spurt of come shooting out of him and splashing the smooth glass, the only barrier between him and outside. The relief is overwhelming to a point where his vision goes dark for a second and his entire universe consists of pure delight for an impressively long time. He feels like he handed himself over wholly and this is his reward for trusting the man behind him – and it was more than worth it. Panting in disbelief, he rides it out until the pleasure has subsided and given way to thorough contentment, a deep-seated warmth relaxing his muscles.

He opens his eyes to Mute staring up at him from the street.

His heart skips a beat and the unexpected adrenalin rush makes him perk up despite the physical exhaustion. No, he’s not imagining it, Mute is indeed looking up to where he is squished against the window, and so is Smoke. Both of them are grinning like people who just got away with murder – but that’s not even all. Hibana, a few metres away, also gapes up at him, pointing and apparently making the others aware because most of them turn and look and Jesus fucking Christ.

“Julien”, he murmurs urgently, pushing against the glass to move them back, further into the room, away from the freaking window which has betrayed him so. “Julien, please -”

“I’m so close”, his lover mews, his grip tightening. He’s not letting go and he’s not letting Blitz move, holy hell, soon everyone will have seen them, and this is when Mute takes out his phone.

No. Fucking. Way.

“Move, Julien, we have to -” He’s flailing, struggling against his lover who reacts by merely shoving Blitz’ upper half against the cold surface, the shock of it causing him to tense once more and this is apparently what does it for Rook.

Helplessly, Blitz stares down at his smiling colleagues while Rook unloads inside him, their hips flush and his hot breath in Blitz’ hair. It’s not made any better by the fact that he can feel literally every throb with which his lover pumps his sperm into him, he feels it all while shuddering in residual want and keeping up eye contact with people he’s going to have to face again very soon.

He wishes for a swift death. Or maybe immediate exile.

This is the worst.

“Julien, they’re looking at us”, he hisses quietly once Rook has started relaxing against him.

“What?” A short pause. “Oh shit. Oh fuck. I didn’t think -” Finally, fucking finally he allows Blitz to move, withdraws gingerly and takes a step back into the safety of darkness. “I’m so sorry, mon cœur, I didn’t know -”

Blitz is both too much in shock and overcome with mortification to reply, so he mutely watches as Rook hurries to wipe the window clean, draw the curtains shut again and switch the light back on. To his credit, he has the decency to look apologetic as he basically wrings his hands in worry.

“At least they had a nice view?”, the Frenchman offers tentatively and that is it. Blitz is going to have to look for a new job. There’s absolutely no way he’ll ever live this down, let alone be able to look any of them in the eyes again. Ever.

“Are you insane?!”, he shoots back, audibly upset. “They watched me – I can’t believe it. None of them even knew -”

“Well, they know now.” Rook takes his hand and drags him into the bathroom and into the spacious shower, quite obviously to take his mind off of this… horror. “It’s okay, mon cœur.”

“Literally none of this is okay!” He got carried away, agreed to Rook’s terms out of guilt; he should’ve refused instead but at that point it wasn’t his upper brain doing the thinking anymore. He wonders whether anyone is going to put ‘excessive embarrassment’ as his cause of death on his tombstone.

While Rook’s gentle caresses under the warm stream of water help soothe him a little, the growing shit-eating grin does exactly the opposite. “Come on, don’t be so grumpy. You’re going to laugh about it one day. And I know you wanted to tell people yourself, but now we don’t need to hide anymore. Really, it’s a win-win situation.”

Blitz doesn’t think he’ll have any success in trying to make Rook understand that if he was embarrassed about being too loud during sex already, being watched by people whom he personally knows is infinitely worse. Not even affectionate kisses can calm the shame raging inside him and so he at first vehemently protests when Rook suggests they go back outside. “There is no way in hell I can show my face right now, neither my pride nor I would survive that.”

“Look, you fell off the horse, you have to get back on it. Better get it over with now, right?”

He has a point. Blitz doesn’t like admitting it, but his cheery boyfriend is possibly right in this, even if his bright smile is incredibly irritating. Eventually he relents after realising that Rook won’t allow for any peace otherwise, splashes his face with some cold water to hopefully reduce the flaming colour a little and fidgets restlessly in the elevator. He’s so far refrained from telling even his closest friends about Rook, so this must come as a shock to some of them. And he definitely would’ve preferred they hear about it any other way.

Everyone’s attention shifts to them as soon as they step out in front of the hotel and Blitz very nearly turns on his heel to storm back in. Rook has placed a supportive hand on his back, nudging him forwards towards their beaming colleagues.

“There you are!”, Mute greets them excitedly. “Did you two -”

“Yes, we are together!”, Blitz snaps at him, interrupting him with the brusque announcement. “And no, I don’t wanna talk about it.”

Deafening silence.

Buck pauses mid-sip, Ying looks up from where she was dramatically dipping a giggling Hibana, and Maestro seems speechless. Even Maestro doesn’t seem to know what to say.

“Riiight”, Mute replies awkwardly the way someone would react to an entirely uncalled-for slur by a racist grandparent, and Smoke murmurs a quiet and yet perfectly audible: “Weird flex but okay.”

Blitz has no idea what’s going on. Mutely, they all stare each other until Rook tugs at his sleeve and wordlessly points up at the hotel.

There’s an illuminated window, by Blitz’ estimate directly above his own room, and two silhouettes are illuminated in a tight embrace. They are the only thing visible and even then it’s a little difficult to make them out as the windows are tinted.

The windows are fucking tinted.

Not only that, their light was switched off and it seems that everyone was amazed at whatever transpired in the actually lit room, not theirs.

“Well”, Blitz says more to himself than anyone else, because.

Because well.

And then he finally gets why everyone is so thrilled, why people were laughing and smiling, why Mute felt the need to record whatever was happening above their room, in plain sight, very unlike what Rook and he were doing at the time.

“It’s Dom and Gilles, isn’t it?”, Rook wants to know, mirroring everyone else’s exhilaration and earns a few nods.

“They were adorable”, Ying fills him in and nearly drops Hibana, “so awkward around each other but so cute, they kept looking at each other and not knowing what to do with their hands, and a few minutes ago they finally kissed. Took them long enough, but they got there. Now what was that about you and Elias?”

“Nothing”, Blitz hurries to answer. He feels Rook’s gaze on him, remembers how well he reacted to the prospect of their friends knowing about them. “I mean – it’s true. We are together.”

And when Hibana finally hits the ground with an exaggerated shriek, it’s almost like a signal for everyone to go back to whatever it is they were doing previously. It’s as if nothing happened, only now Blitz has one secret less to weigh him down. And Rook is smiling at him as if he hung the stars.

“That didn’t go so badly, did it?”, the Frenchman purrs and snakes his arms around Blitz’ waist, pulling them flush. The urge to fight the casual display of affection is still present but Blitz squashes it without much effort, thinking back to Mute and Smoke leaning into each other as if it was the most natural thing on this world. And… it really is, isn’t it?

“Could’ve been a lot worse”, he agrees and kisses him. A few ‘awww’s erupt behind them and he doesn’t know whether they’re directed at them or maybe Bandit and Montagne who have gone back to kissing as well, but it doesn’t matter. They all know now and it’s certainly the better option compared to knowing everyone watched him get -

“Does this mean I can spend the night in your room?”

Rook is being cheeky and both of them are aware, he often jokingly suggests things despite knowing Blitz will say no, only this time he gets a nod without hesitation. “Yeah. I’d like that.” Rook’s instant joy makes it more than worth it, though it also prompts Blitz to clarify one thing extremely carefully: “But we’re never doing anything like this again.”

#rainbow six siege #blitz #rook #blitz/rook #fanfic #oneshot #I apparently wasn't aware of how fond I actually am of these two #but it was a lot of fun to write #bet you all saw this going a little differently

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enemyoftrust · 6 years

Note

1-100 ily :-)

Is a kiss considered cheating?

mmm depends

Have you ever faked orgasm?

nah

If you could have one superpower, what would it be?

super strength for sure

Do you think you are going to be rich in 7-8-9 years?

Tell us some funny drunk story.

no being drunk isnt funny shit

Why are you no longer together with your ex?

cos she dumped me???

If you had to choose one way to die, what would it be?

death by women

What are your current goals?

feel like im alive LOL

Do you like someone?

Who was the last person to disappoint you?

Do you like your body?

haha no

Can you keep a diet?

If the whole world listened to you right now, what would you say?

if u dont eat pussy ur a coward

Do you work?

no but i want to

If you could choose only one food to eat to the rest of your life, what would it be?

tacos

Would you get a tattoo?

maybe

Something you don’t mind spending all your money on?

you

Can you drive?

yeah but not well according to you

When was the last time someone told you you were beautiful?

i dont know to be honest

What was the last thing you cried for?

my lack of feelings

Do you keep a journal?

Is life fun?

idk

Is farting in front of people irrelevant?

its whatever my dude u gotta be quiet about it

What’s your dream car?

green mazda miata

Are grades in school important?

sure

Describe your crush.

tall, green eyes, looks like an angel, smile that lights up a room, beautiful voice

What was the last book/movie that really impressed you?

i dont know

What was your last lie?

i lie constantly im not sure

Dumbest lie you ever told?

i told like 4 people in the eighth grade that i had internal bleeding in my lungs

Is crying in front of people embarrassing?

it can be i cried every day in school for like a week my senior year

Something you did and you are proud of?

my gpa rn

What’s your favourite cocktail?

idfk

Something you are good at?

making you feel better

Do you like small kids?

sometimes

How are you feeling right now?

nonexistant

What would you name your daughter/son?

florence

What do you need to be happy?

i don’t know i’ve never been happy

Is there some you want to punch in the face right now?

myself?

What was the last gift you received?

the stuff u gave me for our 1 year anniversary.

What was the last gift you gave?

a speaker for mom for m day

What was the last concert you went to?

julien baker

Favourite place to shop at?

i dont know

Who inspires you?

you, lynn gunn

How old were you when you first got drunk?

like 18

How old were you when you first got high?

n/a

How old were you when you first had sex?

define sex :))) first orgasm by someone else probably 16, first like full gay sex 19

When was your first kiss?

7th grade

Something you want to do until the end of this year?

love u

Is there something in the past you wish you hadn’t done?

i regret so many things

Post a selfie.

maybe

Who are you most comfortable around?

you

Name one thing that terrifies you.

getting old

What kind of books do you read?

i don’t

What would you tell your 12 year old self?

stop dating boys Now

What is your favourite flower?

carnations

Any bad habits you have?

nail biting

What kind of people are you attracted to?

u hello

What was the last thing you cried for?

i answered this fuck off

Is there something you don’t eat? Some food that truly disgust you?

celery is dumb

Are you in love?

yeah

Something you find romantic?

when you call me pretty :|

How long was your longest relationship?

a year and a half

What are 3 things that irritate you about the same sex?

theyre all tryna fight each other constantly like why cant we just love each other

What are 3 things that irritate you about the opposite sex?

toxic masculinity

What are you saving money for?

idk

How would you describe your bad side?

short tempered, violent, snappy, introverted, passive aggressive

Are you actually a good person? Why?

i think. i try to love everyone.

What are you living for?

i’m not sure.

Have you ever done anything illegal?

yep

Do you like your body?

noo

Have you ever made someone feel bad about themselves intentionally?

yeah i’m really spiteful

Ever sent nudes?

not like Real nudes

Have you ever cheated on someone?

mmmmm define cheating

Favourite candy?

100 grands

Is there a blog you visit every day, or almost every day? Tag it!

@butterccupp

Do you play any computer games? What is your favourite game?

i dont play computer games but if i did it’d be overwatch

Favourite TV series?

rwby

Are you religious? Does God exist?

yes yes

What was the last book you read? Did it impress you and why?

i don’t really remember.

What do you think about vegetarianism/veganism?

its rad but i cant do it !

How long have you been on Tumblr?

too long

Do you like Chineese food?

yes

McDonalds or Subway?

mcdonalds

Vodka or whiskey?

either

Alcohol or drugs?

alcohol

Ever been out of your province/state/country?

yes

Meaning behind your blog name?

its a name u called me a couple times

What are you scared of?

i answered this

Last time you were insulted?

i dont know i dont talk to anybody

Most traumatic experience ?

my high school girlfriend stringing me along n cheating on me n then dumping me

Perfect date idea?

me and u havin a picnic in the fall

Favourite app on your phone?

discord because i scream at @snilloverwatch about nothing all day

What colour are the walls in your room?

baby blue

Do you watch Youtube? Who is your favourite youtuber?

Share your favourite quote.

skate fast eat ass

What is the meaning of life?

idk just be kind

Do you like horror movies?

Have you ever made your mum cry? What happened?

yeah i told her i was gay like 5 times

Do you feel lucky or special in a way?

lucky, not special

Can you keep a secret?

sure

#butterccupp

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slothrusts · 7 years

Link

Hey @taylorswift ! Since you made a playlist for us, I thought I’d make one for you. Music is my life, I even study it at school, and my favorite thing about music is songwriting (which is probably why I love you so much). Lyrics are the most important part of a song to me, but soundscapes are also really rad. So here’s 19 songs that I adore, both lyrically and sonically, and hope that you will also like! @taylornation and fellow swifties feel free to listen in as well :)

Also, Taylor, look beneath the Read More for the track listing and me talking about each song like I know what I’m talking about lol

1.) Lit Me Up- Brand New

This is the best opening song of all opening songs. Brand New has created such an interesting soundscape and feel with the whole Science Fiction Album. It’s creepy, but great. Taylor I feel like you’d really enjoy some of the binaural action going on.

2.) Turn Out the Lights- Julien Baker @julienbaker

Julien Baker is one of THE BEST lyricists I have ever found (besides you of course Tay). Everything she writes is heart-wrenching and beautiful and I love it. I mean, come on “When I turn out the lights/there’s no one left/between myself and me” (lyk if u cri evrytim). This is a single from her forthcoming album by the same name and I highly recommend you listen to her debut Sprained Ankle cause damn is it good.

3.) Horseshoe Crab- Slothrust

This song is a trip man. Slothrust (its Sloth-rust not Slo-thrust fyi) is this cool little rock/jazz/blues band from Brooklyn that I ADORE. Leah writes some outlandish but still poignant af lyrics. Notably: “Sometimes I feel like I’m a sea horse/Sometimes I think that I’m a horseshoe crab/I don’t have anything in common with myself/Except that I came from the sea just like everyone else did”

4.) Ready to Go- Hurts @adam-hurts

Suggested activity while listening to this song is dancing because damn it’s a certifiable BOP.

5.) Queen- Flint Eastwood @flinteastwooddetroit

You’ve probably never seen these guys play live but Jax Anderson is a hype beast like no other and can get a crowd full of people who have never heard her music to sing and jump along like they’re the headliners. The chorus gets u going and I think that reputation era Taylor would appreciate “I’m a queen not a soldier”

6.) I Forgive No One- Citizen

While I’m not sure if this genre/sound is your thing Taylor, it does remind me a lot of the whole reputation era mindset. “I forgive no one for anything/I forgive no one for what can change”

7.) Moonshine- Lights @lightsalot

Another great bop about staying up late and partying. Also Lights wrote and drew an entire comic book series to go along with this concept album?? How fucking cool is that?? It reminds a bit of New Romantics in the attitude of “who gives a shit lets go party anyway!!”

8.) Sunshine Type- Turnover @turnoverva

Turnover is my go-to feel good band. This song actually sounds like the way sunshine feels. “I was thinking that you could love a song that I hate/I’d still play it for you”.

9.) Separate- Pvris @thisispvris

I’d imagine that swimming underneath an iceberg sounds like this song. Pvris (pronounced like Paris not p-virus or puh-vris) makes some super spooky but beautiful things. And can we talk about “There’s always been a disconnect/Running from my heart to my head/And no it’s never made much sense” as well as “Pull away the world from me I don’t mind/As long as they don’t separate you from me I’ll be fine”. It’s almost the opposite of Clean, but in a good way. This entire album has got some killer outros btw.

10.) Burn it Down- Daughter

Elena Tonra from Daughter is SUCH a GREAT lyricist. You, her, and Julien are probably the best lyricists that I know of honestly. Plus, her, Remi, and Igor as a band make some DOPE soundscapes that you can get actually physically lost in. “Always said I was a good kid/Always said I had a way with words/Never knew I could be speechless/Don’t know how I’ll ever break this curse”. They wrote this album for a video game soundtrack, but the one before this one Not to Disappear is lyrically so powerful I cry every time I see them live lol.

11.) Trainwreck- Banks

Banks is a bad ass bitch and I think you and her would get along swimmingly. Also perhaps invite her to sing this with you on the rep tour?? (hint hint wink wink) “Born to take care of you, or I thought so/Maybe it was just a phase” It’s like an updated more sonically banging Dear John imo

12.) Helicopter- Deerhunter

Back on the soundscape train Deerhunter just sounds cool as shit. The lyrics to this one are story-based and talk about some guy who was a victim of human trafficking. BUT Bradford Cox makes it sound cerebral and plucky.

13.) Deadcrush- alt-J

I love this song cause it has the coolest premise. It’s about the Dead Crushes of the band members. So like, dead people that the band members admire. The crushes are Anne Boleyn and Lee Miller. I particularly enjoy the music video for this song which is weird as all hell. The pulsing beat that drives this song is something that I think you would appreciate, Taylor. This is one of the songs where it feels more like the words are meant to be a part of a music rather than their own separate piece if that makes sense.

14.) SGL- Now, Now @nownowband

SGL stands for “Shot Gun Lover” and holy heck does this lyrically resemble some of your stuff! Sign me the fuck up for “Starry-eyed/I was young and undone/But I could’ve died/With you there in the sun”. I’ve been listening to this band for almost as long as I’ve listened to you but they recently got a more pop sound and I am LIVING for it

15.) Lose Myself- From Indian Lakes @fromindianlakes

I saw on your playlist that you like Cigarettes After Sex and so I thought you might also enjoy the recent stuff by From Indian Lakes. This is the kind of song you listen to when driving home from a date. Ponder closely, “Am I the worm on a lover’s hook/And now I’m right where I’m supposed to be/But something still feels wrong with me”

16.) You and I (stripped version)- Pvris

Pvris gets to be on here twice cause they are that good sorry but I don’t make the rules (wait yes I do). The lyrics here also remind me of you and how we all just have way too many feelings and our best shot at figuring things out is through writing about them. You and I is about a love that’s not working but that is still desperately wanted, “I know it’s cold when we’re apart/And I hate to feel this die/But you can’t give me what I want/Just give it time”. Listen to this stripped version to hear how beautiful and lilting Lynn’s voice is and listen to the full band version to hear how much of a powerhouse her voice can be.

17.) Jesus Christ- Brand New

Yes another Brand New song. You know why? Cause they are also fucking amazing. Taylor, I recommend you listen to this song while lying in your bed staring up at the ceiling and thinking “How the hell did I get here, and how the hell am I gonna leave?” (here can be anywhere, your hotel room, you home, this universe). The next time you read a shitty headline about you in a tabloid think about the lyrics, “We all got wood and nails/And we turn out hate in factories/We all got wood and nails/And we sleep inside of this machine”

18.) Townie- Mitski @whoismitski

“I want a love that falls as fast as a body from the balcony/And I want a kiss like my heart is hitting the ground/I’m holding my breath with a baseball bat though I don’t know what I’m waiting for/I’m not gonna be who my daddy wants me to be”…… do I need to say anything else? Hopefully you’ve already heard some of Mitski’s stuff cause she’s gonna be on tour with your homegirl @lordemusic this next spring!

19.) Pigpen- Slothrust

Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night with the post-chorus riff from this song in my head. Taylor, the lyrics I’d want you to hear the most from this one are; “I would spread my wings/If they weren’t so god damn heavy/Yeah I would spread my wings/If they weren’t coated in honey”

And that’s everyone!! I hope you liked at least one of these songs @taylorswift . Love you eternally and catch you on the flipside!!!

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fematchups · 7 years

Note

Hi! could I get a romantic matchup for all 3? please and thank you! I'm kind of shy but I love to talk about books and my friends and family are everything to me. I'm the oldest of my siblings and the peacekeeper between the two younger ones. However I do get mad pretty easily, and sometimes struggle to remain calm and not be mean or petty. I also love music and art, and watching people dance - I only dance when I'm alone bc I'm not as graceful as I think lol - and I have a huuuge sweet tooth

Nohr: Laslow

Once you were away from everyone else, you decided to dance around for a bit just to release some energy. You thought nobody would find you, but Laslow happened to see you. He suavely joined in, whisking you away into a waltz before quickly apologizing for interrupting you and saying goodbye with a kiss on your hand. After this fateful encounter, the two of you grow closer as you increasingly spend more time together. You often go on dates to visit art galleries and to concerts. If you ever feel like dancing to the music at a concert, Laslow will find a secret spot where you two can dance without the crowds. You two also enjoy having picnics together on sunny days of course, where Laslow can make flower crowns for you or decorate your hair (and sometimes outfit) with the petals.

Hoshido: Ryoma

You’re both the eldest siblings in your families, which gives you a lot to talk about every time you interact. Ryoma loves to hear stories about your family, and you love listening to him talk about his own as well. Every time you see one another in passing, your small talk quickly evolves into a long conversation. One of you always says that you need to attend to something, but neither one of you can stop talking so you continue gabbing until someone comes to retrieve you and remind you of your duties. Over time, the two of you realize how compatible you truly are and a romance blossoms between you two. It all works out well, since you both love spending time with one another’s families. You both tend to get mad easily, and so you make it a point to continuously work at your tempers in your relationships; you never go to sleep while still angry with one another. Ryoma knows you have quite the sweet tooth, and often tries to surprise you by baking you some sweet treats by himself. He often ends up asking Sakura for advice (since she too has a sweet tooth), but won’t actually let her help bake because he wants to be able to tell you he’s done it all on his own. Ryoma happens to see you dancing alone one time, and can’t help but bring it up later, letting you know he thought it was absolutely adorable to see you dance like no one’s watching. He’s not much of a dancer, but he’ll gladly offer to dance with you and only you.

Awakening: Miriel

A lot of your early conversations revolve around your favorite novels, since you share a lot of favorites. You form somewhat of a book club with just the two of you in it, where you two hold meetings to discuss the latest readings. At first book club is all about bonding over books, but eventually the two of you open up to one another and start talking freely about your personal lives. One meeting, Miriel supplies you two with some freshly brewed tea, while you bring some warm crumpets. Neither one of you expected the other to bring refreshments, but you surprised each other—this was the moment the two of you fell hard for one another. Well into your relationship, you both still continue to hold your book club meetings, with plenty of sweets and tea in tow. When you’re not discussing literature, the two of you can be found browsing art galleries and getting so lost in each other’s company and the company of the art to care that the gallery might be closing soon. Miriel is the type of person to leave little love notes here and there for you to find. Your heart always skips a beat when you happen upon one of Miriel’s love notes, and you race to find her and give her a kiss on the cheek to show your appreciation. You love seeing her blush scarlet red when you do this, as she tries to stifle the grin about to cross her face.Songs listened to:

Demi Moore // Phoebe BridgersLos Federales // Signal HillGolden Hill // TristezaI’ll See You When We’re Both Not So Emotional // American FootballGo Home // Julien BakerPin // Yeah Yeah YeahsHaiti // Arcade FireUsed to Love You (feat. Jhené Aiko) // Yuna

#matchup #fefates #nohr #hoshido #fe awakening #laslow #ryoma #miriel #anon #mini song list

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lexiemoso · 4 years

Text

For APPRENTICE APRIL these are my answers 😄😄

The Basics. What is your character’s name? How old are they? How tall are they? Skin color? Eye color? Hair color? Gender identification?

My MC’s name is Morrigan. It makes allusion to a warrior queen.

She is 23 years old, and they’re are 5,5”

She has a fair skin tone , not very pale . She has a lot of blue tattoo-like marks all over her body in spiral forms,she has them since birth just like her mother did. The marks reach up to her face only on the right side.

She has some deep green eyes.

She is a red head , yet her hair is darker than Portia’s and julian’s, almost a wine color.

She is a female .

Extra: She has a very strong Nordic accent due to her Natal tribe.

 2. Love Interest. Who does your character love? What attracted them to that particular LI?

My character love’s Muriel. Since the moment she saw him she felt some type of way , and she simply stayed by his side form then on. She was attracted by Muriel’s green eyes and sweet soul. They are total opposites though, but they don’t really argue. She is a very intense woman who takes manners on her own hands, specially if someone messes with her dear Muriel, yet he always knows how to cool her down.

 3. Familiar. Does your character have a familiar? How did they meet? Her familiar is a raccoon called Igor . They met when Igor was a baby, and she was fairly young as well. She was wondering around the woods when a small fur ball fall on her head . She picked him up and the rest is history.

 4. Hobbies. What kinds of things does your character like to do for fun? She likes sewing tapestries in her free time , as well as reading any kind of books. She often hangs out with Julien to learn a bit about medicine since she find it very interesting.

 5. Hidden talents. Is there something neat that your character can do? Tie a cherry stem into a knot with their tongue? Say any word backwards perfectly?

She is a very good singer , the people of her tribe are known for possessing beautiful almost ethereal voices, and she is not the exception. Muro calls her “Little hummingbird “ every now and then since she is usually humming or singing in a low tone while making any type of activity. She’d often sing ancient lullabies to help Muriel sleep when he has nightmares.

 6. Magical talents. Is there a specific type of magic that your character excels at? Any magic they aren’t so great at? Or do they actually shy away from magic altogether?

She knows a bit of elemental magic , yet her stronger ability is the capacity of using the magic to enhance her battleground abilities (kind of creating a berserker effect) , she might be better in magic altogether if she practiced more often , but for now it just focuses on predicting and arcana reading .

 7. Interaction. How does your character typically interact with people? Despite of her background as a fierce warrior, she’s actually a very sweet person. She can be very sarcastic , yes, but in general she is very open and kind and she is always chatting with the people that surrounds her. She never misses the chance to gossip with the market merchants.

She is always willing to help and support anyone.

 8. Romance. What is something that your character and their LI love to do together? How do they show affection?Morrigan and Muri enjoy nature very much, they love to spend time in the woods, or simply exploring new places and enjoying the view. As you may know ,Muriel is a very shy person , total opposite of Morrigan. Yet that makes the perfect match since she often knows what does Muriel needs with just a gaze. They can spend hours and hours just conversating about any topic , Muriel may often make fun of Morrington . Indoors they are two lovebirds. Morrigan is very affectionate and is in constant seek for attention, Muriel doesn’t really mind . She is very adventurous and he is very protective, so they often take care of each other.

 9. Travel. Does your character like to travel outside of Vesuvia? How often? For how long? What kinds of things do they do away from home?

Morrington absolutely loves to travel. She travels every time she has the chance and as long as she needs to learn from the place she is visiting , yet she usually is back by a month or so. When she is away she just learns from everyone and everything, always bringing back presents for their friends, and lots of stories about the people of the place she is visiting.

 10. WTF. Has anything just…weird ever happened to your character? Something that made them stop and go “What just happened?!”

There are three WTF moments that come to mind.

The first one is the first time she was able to summon magic. She had no idea she could do that since she grew away from her tribe so she never really had the notion of magic in her blood. She was very pissed at a bunch of kids that were messing with two other kids , and out of nowhere a loud THUD was heard , the floor cracking underneath her feet towards they children. They ran away . When she realized what happened she threw up.

The second time was when she encountered her familiar, cause like , a raccoon simply falling onto her head ? Really?

The third one was her first interaction with Muriel, the way her world shook in the moment she saw him (not really trying to be romantic here , she seriously felt like something was very wrong inside her , it was terrifying) it messed up quite hard with her mind for a few days, she even started to avoid him but it didn’t last long, he is a sweetheart and she gave in pretty soon.

 11. Crime. Has your character ever been arrested? If so, what did they do? Have they ever helped stop a crime?

She has been arrested a couple times for bad behavior , specially after a few drinks . But it’s always a night in the dungeons and that’s mostly it since Nadia always comes to the rescue.

She has helped stop a crime before , yes. She hates watching people taking advantage of others. She had stopped some thief’s that tried to mug her or someone when she was around. There was a time in her teenage years she would actually get paid for handing in wanted minor criminals. She quit after a year or two .

 12. Secrets. What is a secret that your character has? Are they in line for the throne in a far off land? Was there this one time at band camp…? Are they secretly involved in an assassin’s guild?

She is actually filled with secrets involving her past and her roots , only Muriel knows them since she can spend hours and hours talking about her tribe (or at least what she knows about it). She also worked as a mercenary for a while when she was young , but after a fatidic night she quit.

 13. Overcompensation. Is there something that your character just HAS to do better than anyone else? Or are they just that dang good without trying? If they see someone else showing off, what is their kneejerk reaction?

She has to be the best in everything she can. She is always pushing herself to the limit and further, it’s in her nature. She is simply to stubborn to conform. Yet she loves to support others when they show off in something they are very good at.

 14. Fight Club. Is your character a good fighter? What kind of skills do they have?

She is a good fighter , it was very obvious since she was a kid. When she was about 6 (she is “orphan “ since she was taken away form her tribe when she was very young and spent around two years in a kind of “kid-market” dungeon. She was not an agressive kid, yet she always stood up for herself and for other kids when someone tried to take advantage of them. That didn’t pass unnoticed . On a winter night when she was 6, a man came and after paying a few gold coins , she took her away . This man trained her very well and she grew up to be a very good warrior. This man wasn’t exactly a good man, yet after a few years he showed her his blue marks , similar to hers, and then she understood why he always gave her a special care. Everything she knows about her tribe is thanks to that man.

She is very fast and agile. She may not be the strongest warrior of all yet she compensates it with technique and strategy. Plus , using her magic in battle is a great plus since it puts her in a kind of hipnotized state that helps her fight hours in end . She ends up pretty drained though, so she usually sleeps for days after a battle.

 15. The Arts. Is your character a creative type? What kinds of things can they create? Can they act? Street perform?

She is kind of creative , she creates tapestries of anything her eyes can see or her mind can imagine. Other than that she’s not a very good dancer , nor a good actor either unless she uses it for her “job”.

 16. Goofy. Is your character a clown? Do they like to make people laugh?

She is a total clown. She is very hyper and very goofy in her daily basis. She is often making faces or voices just to make people laugh. Muriel looses it over her Julian impression. She really likes to make people laugh, and she is always laughing at something.

 17. Language. Is your character multilingual? How many languages do they speak? Do they have an accent? Is it sexy? Is it silly? Do they have a multilingual lisp?

She is. She knows how to speak in Nordic and she speaks Vesuvia’s lenguage. She has a very heavy accent actually. I think it is more on the silly side due to the things she is often saying. She doesn’t have a lisp.

(I picture it something like this mixed with the “potbelly” Chic from pulpfiction lol)

youtube

 18. Embarrassment. What is something really embarrassing that your character has done/said?

She’s not easily embarrassed honestly. She usually thinks everything before saying it out loud. Which makes you wonder why she says so much dumb stuff.

She gets embarrassed when she is proven wrong though.

 19. Memory. Has your character gotten any of their memory back? If so, what? Did it change them? She has gotten back just small bits of her memory, but it’s okay since she is very good at letting go.

 20. Family. Talk about your character’s family. Who were they?

She was born in a Nordic tribe of good warriors , but their existence didn’t revolve around “fighting” like lucio’s. They were very nature centered people, everything they did was from and for their connection with the energy of the elements .

(The picture isn’t mine but I’m using it as a reference)

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shuttaapp · 7 years

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Skate to create: Neal Boyd

Neal Boyd, a.k.a Grimcity, has spent more than 30 years surfing on the concrete. Although he does it mainly for fun, he has accidentally compiled an enormous experience in this field.

In this interview, we talk with Neal Boyd about skateboarding, how we got his start, his Youtube channel, the pro skaters who influenced him most, and his thoughts about the skateboarding scene.

1. Where are you originally from?

I was born in Jackson, Mississippi, raised in Jackson, Louisiana, and have lived in Hamond, Louisiana since 1995. I claim Hammond as my home. We're between New Orleans and Baton Rouge, so it's a perfect spot to be in.

2. What's your favorite quality in a person?

Honesty, ethics, and a really good sense of humor.

3. How and when did you discover skateboarding?

When I was 10 years old, I lived in a really small, rural neighborhood. One of my my neighbors had bought a skateboard for his kid, but it never got used. We lived on top of a hill, and as I played with it I eventually was given permission to use it whenever I wanted to. It was basically given to me. The year was 1985.

4. Where does your online name “grimcity” come from?

When I was in college, I self-published a comic book for a little over a year… It was violent, but also very, very comedic. The name of the city where all the action took place in was “Grim City.” I'd also created a comic strip character that I'd used for comic strips (and the comic book) named “Grim,” so in the relatively early days of the internet I just used “grimcity” as my online persona.

Some of my friends call me Grim in real life, though I'm completely the opposite of a grim person… I'm actually very geeky and goofy and I have a lot of love for everything. My nature is very positive, so the nickname “Grim” and “grimcity” is kind've a joke in and of itself.

5. What was your first board and your first memory of skateboarding?

The first board I can claim was the one my neighbor (Mr. Tom) basically gave to me… It was a Variflex he'd bought for his own kid, but he let me ride it as much as I wanted to. I feel in love with it more than his little one did, so I really owe him a lot... He literally exposed me to skateboarding.

After that I had a Nash from a a department store (due to not having any money), but my first pro board was a Jeff Grosso from Santa Cruz. He's a living legend, and I've been fortunate enough to hang out with him. Really love that guy.

My first memory of skating was really just being a little 10 year old kid going really fast down the hills surrounding where I lived. We were a small town, and this was pre-internet, so I didn't even know how big skating was back then.

6. You created a Youtube channel which already has more than 4.000 subscribers and a 100 videos. Tell us a little bit about it. What is the main purpose of the channel?

The channel has actually been around for a while now… A little over 10 years I think? When I first started it it was simply to store videos because my hard drives were running out of space. After that, I got into doing really in-depth skate product reviews, and though I've slacked on that a bit, my focus lately has been making self-filmed skate videos with a focus on composition, color, and framing. If you look at my later videos with the eyes of a photographer, rather than a videographer or even a skateboarder for that matter, it makes more sense.

7. Who has been your biggest influence on your skateboarding?

When I was a kid, everyone was an influence… I wanted to ollie as high as Natas Kaupas, become an all terrain guy like The Gonz, skate fast like Tommy Guerro, float in the air like Hosoi, be as funny as Grosso, and skate as raw as all of the Sick Boys, who were a group of guys from San Francisco (some already mentioned) that included Jim Thiebaud, Julien Stranger, Ron Allen, Mickey Reyes, Archimedes, and a huge list of other people.

These days I'm a lot older, but I'm still influenced by a lot of people. Jim Thiebaud and I wound up becoming really good friends several years back, as well as my man Mickey Reyes. They run my favorite skateboard company (Deluxe) and even if I'd never met them, I'd be riding everything they make, including Real Skateboards, Thunder trucks, and Spitfire wheels. They have a huge influence on me because the company uses skateboarding to help people in need, from helping hurricane victims to providing money to facilities that help kids beat cancer.

I'm also heavily influence by the younger skaters that I roll with here in my city. I've seen them develop from wobbly-legged beginners to absolute skate machines over the years. I thrive on that. Many of these kids have tricks that I will never, ever be able to land, but that's part of passing the torch. I love my Hammond locals, and they push me as hard as I push them to progress in our own respective ways.

8. What's your favorite trick and who do you think does a perfect version of that trick?

I have two: the first one is the Ollie Impossible, and the perfect ones were done by Dylan Rieder who sadly passed away in 2016. Secondly, I love doing simple little kickflips, and to see them done perfectly, I stare in awe whenever Dennis Busenitz does them (or any variation of them).

9. Are Pro skaters role models?

Pro skaters are just like everybody else. If they are role models, I don't think they mean to be. Having said, they're definitely influential. I think kids try to emulate the tricks and styles they see from pros, but as with everyone, we have our good and bad sides. If I were to direct a kid towards someone who might be a role model both in the act of skateboarding as well as just being a good person, I'd list them as follows:

1. Daewon Song: He's the embodiment of progression, and he's a genuinely good person. He's about as old as I am, and like me, he's still a kid at heart that just wants to skate.

2. John Cardiel: His energy, positivity, and drive are the embodiment of what skateboarding is. He's a legend, and if you were to ask most pro skaters who their favorite pro was, they'd say Cardiel. He suffered a catastrophic injury which was supposed to make him unable to walk again, but he defeated it. When you watch any of his old footage, it compels you to get up, grab your board, and go for it.

3. Rodney Mullen: He invented most of the street tricks we do today, but more importantly to me, he's always continuing his education in other areas, including higher maths and architecture. It's one thing to simply become a better skateboarder, but it's also important to expand your knowledge base with other subjects, from the arts to astrophysics. Knowledge is easy to access today, and if you're not skating, I recommend reading a good non-fiction book or at least listening to an academic lecture on any given topic on You Tube. Lots of universities post lectures online, so there's no reason not to get a better understanding of the world. I watch or listen to at least one lecture a day, and on weekends I try to get at least two.

10. What's your go-to spot?

I live right around the corner from the concrete park I shoot video at in my YouTube and Instagram videos, but one of my favorite places (which I've documented a lot online, including Shutta) is a yellow parking curb next to a fountain. It's simply a curb in a secluded location where I can go and clear my head.

11. Who do you usually skate with?

Our local park is a family… The Dreamland squad. We have a couple of crews inside that family, namely the Therapy crew and the False Teeth crew. I also skate with a ton of friends from New Orleans, Baton Rouge, and Lafayette.

12. Have you ever joined a competition?

I have, but I'm not really a competitive skater. Most of the contests I've entered have been here in Louisiana, so for us it's not so much about winning as it is an opportunity to see everyone you know and have a really good time. Our contests are more like family reunions.

13. As one of the best skaters in the app and winner of one #ShuttaMission, explain to us how has your experience been when taking photos with Shutta.

I'd hate being known as one of the best skaters using the app! I prefer thinking I'm the best at having fun at skating, which is hopefully a sentiment shared by every skater!

I sincerely love the app, and am working on a video about it to get some more skaters involved with it. I started using Shutta before the user interface was redesigned, and still use it when I'm out recording. It's better at getting precise screen captures from videos than taking stills directly from the iPhone, the wheel tool that allows you to scrub through the timeline is brilliant. A lot of skateboard tricks are less than a second long (like jumping over something), and the “peak” part of that trick is probably down into the milliseconds… So being able to easily get to the exact moment you want to capture is just the best. I also like that I get an image saved to my camera's library, and simultaneously get to share it with an international community of people that get hyped when they see something new.

I'm also very appreciative that Shutta picked me as a winner for the “Freeze” contest. I'm a geek by nature, and the Tomtom Bandit camera is really well made. I've been using it a ton! I still can't believe I believe I won something like this by just going out in my town and skating like I always do. There are aspects of it that I prefer over my GoPro and my iPhone, so it's with me everywhere I go, even if I'm not skateboarding.

14. Any views on the skateboarding scene?

On a local level, I'm extremely happy that skaters today have it easier than my generation did. Skateboarding in the states wasn't looked at positively by a large swath of society for a long time, it was all underground, and growing up, I got into a ton of fights with people who would literally walk up to aggressively and instigate violence. We were punk rock/hip hop street kids that skated and ate concrete for fun, so we always had to handle confrontations as best we could. These days, there's been a mainstreaming of skateboarding that has allowed it to progress in ways I never thought it would, but I'm a bit conflicted, if not hypocritical of it. On one hand, I love that there are skateparks popping up everywhere, but on the other I hate seeing the media portray skateboarding as a sport, and I don't like the idea of it being in the Olympics. I'm glad that there's a boost of revenue for the pro skaters and skate companies that benefit from all of this exposure, but the old sentimental side of me still kind've misses the anti-establishment nature that skating had when I got into it.

15. What do you have planned for the near future?

My plans today are the same as they always have been… I want to push myself in whatever direction skateboarding takes me, and I want to do what I can at being a better person in general. I just want to be a good global neighbor, be the best at what I do professionally (computer geekery), and hopefully help the up and coming skaters in my area know more about the roots of skateboarding. The main goal is to ensure that the kids I skate with now become really old skaters like me.

Go follow Neal Boyd on Shutta and subscribe to his Youtube channel to see more!

All pics by Neal Boyd.

#skateboarding #skate #skatelife #skateboard #girls skateboarding #urban #sports #skatepark #street skating #skating #skater #longboarding #ollie #interview #shutta #shutta app #photography #skate photography

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imagineclaireandjamie · 7 years

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Our Story

Read the other chapters here.

Life goes on—quickly, greedily, and with a hunger that brings them to their knees. How to satiate it? How to stop it? They start journals (Claire), write more books (Jamie), do everything they can snag the veil with immortalized moments. If a memory is made concrete, they think—in writing or in a photograph—then perhaps time will have to move around it? Be forced to decelerate? (Time doesn’t care. About them, about anyone. The universal enemy.)

Claire is promoted to Chief of Staff, improves at Scrabble, develops a lump in her breast they believe to be cancer (it isn’t). Jamie learns how to sail without puking, gets a teaching job at Chapel Hill. He is less motivated by the idea of tenure—stability, money—than by the opportunity to stoke creative sparks in others just like him. In the fourth row sits a girl whose essays are colored by the loss of her mother, the grief of it found even in the gray eraser clouds. The boy behind her writes poems of spun sugar, overly romantic but endearing in their sincerity, and Jamie remembers this boy whenever he looks in the mirror.

Jamie grows a beard specifically to impress them. All of his professors concealed their weakening chins in thickets of hair, so why not him? The new aesthetic receives a positive response: Claire loves its tickle between her legs, his classes seem to find him wiser and mind less when his memory suddenly fails. (A common occurrence as of late, damn it all.) But when Jamie shaves for the summer, he feels strangely guilty—Bree’s expression, a scowl of disappointment in the reclaimed smoothness of his face. (The source of her sadness is revealed a few days later: she’d believed her father was Santa Claus.)

Jamie and Claire watch their bodies sag, widen. They watch their cholesterol, their caloric intake. There is the month-long agony of a shared paleo diet, an experiment which, come July, they decide is the dumbest thing they’ve ever done.

“No carbs!” Jamie crows in disbelief.

“No alcohol!” Claire hoots.

“Did I tell ye I cheated one day?”

“Jamie, you didn’t!”

“Aye, I ate Bree’s leftover macaroni,” he says. “Gobbled it right up, didna even use a fork.”

“Bloody traitor,” Claire says, and they laugh and laugh. Clink hearty glasses of wine as a toast to the old-age blessing of letting go and getting fat. (Jamie will repay Claire under the full moon, to redeem himself.)

For a while, it seems everyone they know gets divorced: a beloved colleague, a woman in Claire’s book club. When they hear the news, they praise their own luck, secretively locking hands before offering their sympathies. Such announcements inspire extra enthusiasm for the “Married” boxes on government forms. And saying things like, “My wife, Claire” or, “Have you met Jamie, my husband?” gives them a heart-swelling high. (Belatedly, they realize this shouldn’t be considered luck at all—but a given. This, their lasting marriage.)

It’s only after the Abernathy’s separation that worry niggles its way between them. They watch each other carefully, sousing out possible itches: a desire to flee to a foreign country, a lust for someone whose faults are more expertly hidden. (No marriage, even Jamie and Claire’s, is without its itches. The difference here is that they never want to scratch them.) Jamie is careful about putting the toilet seat down, and he allots himself just an hour of self-pity for every negative book review. Claire does not organize his messy office, respects the calculated disorganization of his shelves, even though the clutter makes her skin crawl. She keeps the AC off every night that summer, just so she can feel Jamie’s heat next to hers. A way of ensuring that he is still there, sweating himself into their sheets, which will remain unwashed for several days.

Their biggest fight is in September of 2014. One of Jamie’s students begins to show more interest in her professor than in her studies. There are bold advances, firm rejections, a vengeful letter that describes their trysts in explicit detail (strangely, Claire finds the Dear Mrs. Fraser and Xoxo Malva to be the cruelest things of all). All lies, of course, but still Jamie and Claire fight. Feelings of betrayal stew overnight, and Jamie is exiled from their bed like a misbehaving dog, Claire watching from the doorway as Jamie whimpers to the couch. Two days of silence pass—the dean notified, apologies made, and tears shed—before he finally barges into the bathroom, uninvited.

“Are ye going to leave me?” he asks Claire, very quiet for someone who nearly ripped the door from its hinges.

“Jamie, now is not a good time.”

“Why?”

“Because I’m peeing.”

“So ye canna pee in front of me now?”

“Oh, for fuck’s sake.”

But Jamie stays there, waiting, fetches toilet paper when Claire’s hand lights on the used-up cardboard roll. She flushes and stands. A child is born and dies a man in the minute it takes his wife to wash up.

“So?” he asks. “Are ye?”

“Don’t be an idiot,” she says.

They throw themselves into parenthood. Bree learns her ABCs, then her multiplication tables, then how to weep so that the dinosaur coloring book secures a spot in their shopping cart. Some innocence is lost after a public mounting: two petting zoo goats, vigorous thrusts, shameless bleats of ovine ecstasy. On the way home, “Where do babies come from?” is asked loudly from the backseat, though Jamie and Claire’s discomfort speaks louder from the front.

“From…from love,” Jamie stutters. “It’s something very special,” Claire adds—though a child is neither the guaranteed result, nor always the aim. They glance at each other, wondering if their daughter’s newfound awareness will require more discretion in the night. (There’s an element of danger to sex now, and the sneaky, moan-suppressing game of it reminds them of being young again.)

When they revisit the subject a few years later, they add such parental wisdom as: Trust is key; you must trust the person you consider doing It with. (Boy or girl, it doesn’t matter, they will love her anyways, does she know that?)

Actually, there needs to be trust and there needs to be protection. A rubber. A condom? Has Bree ever heard of a condom? (Yes.) What? How? Why is she aware of condoms if she is only eleven years old?

She is twelve years old, she is fourteen, she is sixteen going on thirty. Jamie and Claire spend hours looking for an elusive Pause button, the world moving at the same rapid-fire pace. 2015 becomes 2019, then 2022 in the blink of an eye.

They watch Bree join the volleyball team, break her wrist, break her heart. They watch her pinch whiteheads, lust after jocks and platinum hair dye, suck in her stomach before full-length mirrors (sometimes, this makes them want to cry; sometimes they do). They watch her as she descends the staircase in a pair of towering heels, a vision of silk and emerald and such astounding loveliness that they cannot fathom how their bodies made her.

This is the night of Bree’s senior prom, the winds of change in the air. It is ten hours before she will lose her virginity—a three-minute fumble inside a Toyota—to the boy now standing on the porch. (There will be trust and a condom and the first delirious onslaught of love.) The boy, named Roger, looks utterly stunned as Bree pins his boutonniere to his lapel, as if she has driven the needle straight through his tux, directly into his heart.

The couple is herded to stand beneath the sycamore, and to say, “Cheese!” (“Or gouda,” Jamie jokes, having settled quite comfortably into the routine of bad Dad humor.) Jamie cannot get a picture that isn’t blurry, and so it is Claire, with her steady surgeon’s hands, who manages the perfect shot. This is the photo that will hang on the fridge door, while the other—the one taken mid-parental transition—will make the family album. Roger laughing, Bree rolling her eyes at her father’s incompetence. It is a photo that will make Claire misty whenever she sees it. Even ten years later, when she glues their wedding photo beside it.

Still—life goes on. Birthdays, high school graduation, anniversaries. Bree gets into Harvard, Claire becomes addicted to RuPaul’s Drag Race, Jamie chops off his finger while julienning vegetables. Their Cocker Spaniel, Adso, lunges at the pinkish nub, mistaking it for a discarded bit of hot dog. (Thankfully, Claire rescues the finger, and it is transported in a baggy of ice—along with its owner—to the ER.)

Bree spends freshman winter term in Spain and calls home speaking the language, which only Jamie understands. They make it a joke to mislead Claire with outlandish stories, until she eventually catches on:

“Brianna got a tattoo of Roger’s face in Barcelona,” Jamie translates. “Full color, and at a verra reasonable price.”

“I know for a fact that the word ‘tattoo’ has not been used in this conversation,” Claire replies. “I’ve been watching Rosetta Stone, just FYI.”

“Weel, you’ll just have to see the proof of it, then.”

Doubt flickers across Claire’s face.

“You’re not serious, are you?”

“Maybe.”

“You’re lying.”

“Yes, he’s lying, Mama,” Bree chimes over the speakerphone, and they both start laughing.

“You two are the worst.”

“But you’re the best, Sassenach,”

“Damn right,” she mutters.

November 2028. The year, somehow, is almost over. In one week Bree will come home for Thanksgiving, wearing a Harvard sweatshirt and a promise ring from Roger. Roger himself will tag along, and in the manner of all nervous boyfriends, he will stutter through Jamie’s questions, be all-too-grateful for the distraction of clearing plates. (“Don’t worry about that, I’ll get it!”)

Claire, away on a 3-week conference, will be back as well. She will serve the turkey with a glint in her eye, daring someone to note how the side dishes seem suspiciously store-bought. The table will only offer their effusive praise, lubricating the dry turkey with the chemical-laden gravy, feeding Adso the scraps they couldn’t get down themselves.

Until then, Jamie has the house to himself. He has not been alone like this since the early 2000′s, and his mind becomes unsettlingly untethered by the solitude. He goes hunting, fishing, hiking. He leaves the front door wide open, pours Adso too much food. He forgets his tackle box in the woods and doesn’t realize it’s missing until the sun has sunk. Tomorrow, he thinks.

He attempts to write his story for The New Yorker, but he can’t seem to parse his thoughts into sentences. They buzz around his head like aimless bees, and he almost wishes for a sting, a pricking back to his eloquent senses. (Where is that damn outline he made a month ago?)

Like a teenager, he goes to his bedroom at 3PM, intending to jack off his loneliness. He tries to summon an image of Claire from the last time they fucked (18 days ago!), but there’s nothing clear enough to get him hard. Just a pale throat, the vaguest suggestion of a flower. He resits his phone—he’s called three times in the past six hours—and watches a football game instead.

The days go on. Adso watches him, alert, as if he’s waiting for the final unraveling, the arrival of a ghost. Jamie starts five books, returns them to shelves before he finishes. He prepares extravagant meals, stores the bulk of them in tupperware. He eats, he drinks, he sleeps.

Then, in the middle of the night—a smell. It sits on him, pressing down like an angry fist. He sits up. A searing pain that keeps his eyes closed. A sudden constriction of his lungs. An alarm going off and a dog’s yip, the roar of them traveling through a fog, a—smoke?

There is smoke. Jamie falls out of bed and runs, blindly, but there is only heat where the door should be. He feels heavy; he feels light. He feels as if he is rising high above the house and that he is falling down, far down, beneath it. He plans an escape, but there is no synergy between his mind and his movements. He pauses.

Claire. Where is Claire? If he could just open his eyes, if could just breathe properly, then he would call for her, and—

He is on the floor now. When did he get here? How did he get here? The carpet is soft under his cheek, a pillow to go with the blanket that suffocates him. Perhaps he’ll simply sleep and wait for the nightmare—for that is surely what this is—to end. A dream, only a dream.

But he can’t just lie still! There was someone else, right? That name from a few minutes (hours?) ago is on the very tip of his tongue. He wants to yell it into the screen of smoke, but a surge of memory tells him to conserve his breath. Whoever it is, isn’t here. Whoever it is, wouldn’t hear. (How frustrating it is to feel such desperation for an unknown.)

It’s so hot now, unbearably hot. It reminds him of something. Stories. A boy who sucked the spirit right out of his mother, entered the world in a stolen blaze of fire. Another woman whose hands licked him up and down, the most exquisite burning.

There are sirens. There are shouts. Bright beams flash through the black cloud around him. He raises an arm to admire their light on his skin, deceptively playful in their colorful dance and silent song. Pretty, Jamie thinks, and because the familiarity is a comfort, he lets it take him under.

And just like that, in a wash of red and blue—life stops.

#our story au #;mod liv #only 2-3 more to go eeeeep!

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dantediscoversfic · 7 years

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Chapter 7: Icarus

After our fourth swimming lesson, I invited Ari over to my house for lunch. My parents were curious to meet him (and they claimed I hadn’t stopped talking about him since Monday). My mom was still at work but I knew my dad would be home. He’s an English professor and was spending the summer researching and writing his latest book, which to me looked a lot like hanging around his office all day reading and drinking tea. Not a bad gig, right?

“My dad’s in his office. Let’s say hi then we can make some lunch. I could make peanut butter and jelly, tomato soup or heat up some frozen pizza bites. We could eat those with leftover black beans and rice?”

“Pizza bites with rice and beans? Well there’s a first time for everything, I guess.”

We went into my dad’s office. I could tell Ari was nervous. He didn’t move too far past the doorway and he kept his eyes locked on his shoes.

I sat down on the arm of Dad’s big brown leather chair and gave him a kiss on the cheek. His chin was scratchy (again). “You didn’t shave this morning, Dad.”

“It’s summer.”

“That means you don’t have to work.”

“That means I have to finish writing my book.”

“Writing a book isn’t work.”

Dad laughed his big belly laugh (my favorite of all his laughs). “You have a lot to learn about work.”

“It’s summer, Dad. I don’t want to hear about work.”

“You never want to hear about work.”

I didn’t like where this conversation was headed so I tried a diversionary tactic. I pinched at his chin scruff and asked, “Are you going to grow a beard?”

“No, it’s too hot. And besides, your mother won’t kiss me if I go more than a day without shaving.”

“Wow, she’s strict.” I never minded the ticklish way my dad’s chin felt when it was stubbly, but I guess Mom could lay down the law where her own lips were concerned.

“Yup.”

“And what would you do without her kisses?”

I knew I was getting close to the amount of teasing he’d tolerate. He smiled and turned his attention to Ari, who was still hovering in the doorway. “How do you put up with this guy? You must be Ari.”

“Yes, sir,” Ari said. Sir! Who knew Ari had such good manners?

My dad got up and shook Ari’s hand. Ari’s eyes got all wide. “I’m Sam,” my dad said. “Sam Quintana.”

“Nice to meet you, Mr. Quintana.” Wow Ari was really gunning for polite friend of the year award!

“You can call me Sam,” Dad said.

“I can’t,” Ari said, so quiet I almost couldn’t hear him.

Dad nodded and said, “That’s sweet. And respectful.” Dad turned his eyes to me and said in his trying-to-be-authoritarian voice, “The young man has some respect. Maybe you can learn something from him, Dante.”

“You mean you want me to call you Mr. Quintana?” I sassed. Dad was trying hard to keep a straight face in front of Ari but I was onto him. Dad gave me a look before turning back to Ari. “How’s the swimming?”

“Dante’s a good teacher,” Ari said. I was proud he said that and I liked how my name sounded coming from his lips. He snuck a quick look at me through the curtain of dark hair that half-covered his eyes, almost like we were sharing a secret. He had this way of shaking his head forward every now and then so his hair stayed in a swoop over his eyes. I hadn’t noticed this cute tic of his in the pool when his hair was wet before. I had the sudden urge to tussle up his hair but knew that would not go over well.

“Dante’s good at a lot of things. But he’s not very good at cleaning his room. Cleaning a room is too closely related to the word work.”

I knew where Dad was headed with this and I didn’t like it. “Is that a hint?”

“You’re quick, Dante. You must get that from your mother.”

“Don’t be a wiseass, Dad.” If Mom were here she would have scolded me for using a curse word, but I was taking a chance that Dad wouldn’t mind it. Turns out I was wrong.

“What was that word you just used?”

“Does that word offend you?”

“It’s not the word. Maybe it’s the attitude.”

I rolled my eyes. Ok, maybe I was showing off in front of Ari a little bit. Bravado and all that. I sat down to take off my sneakers.

“Don’t get too comfortable,” Dad said. “There’s a pig sty up there that has your name on it.”

Drat. I’d rolled the dice on the sass-o-meter and lost big time. I was hoping I’d be able to spend all day doing nothing with Ari but it looked like Dad was choosing today of all days to play dictator.

I kicked off my sneakers and wiggled my toes. Ari looked at me a little funny and reached down to take off his shoes, too.

“Oh, you can leave your shoes on if you like,” I said. “I just like having mine off. ‘Free the feet’ is basically my life’s motto.”

“Ok, good. Because my socks both have holes in the toes,” Ari dead-panned and my dad and I both laughed.

“Ari and I need to eat lunch, Dad. You can’t expect me to starve our guest just because you are hell bent on enforcing dictatorial rule about the state of my room.”

“Lunch first. Then clean.”

“Ok, ok.”

For lunch Ari decided pizza bites and black beans was an abomination so he decided to make his “special secret recipe” of fish-stick tacos instead. I was his sous chef and responsible for the chopping. He was a real stickler for chopping, let me tell you. He showed me the best way to hold a knife and the difference between mincing and julienning. I may have known all the technique when it came to swimming but he sure had me beat in knife skills. When it came time for me to chop an onion he got a big grin on his face.

“What?” I asked. “Are you going to laugh when the tears start streaming down my face?”

“Ok, I read this thing about onions in a magazine once but have never got to try it.”

“Try what?”

“Apparently if you wear goggles it will stop you from crying.”

So we put our goggles on and it actually worked! We liked wearing them so much we spent the rest of the time preparing the meal pretending like we were underwater. I don’t normally like cooking but I didn’t mind it with Ari.

After we’d eaten and cleaned up we went up to my room.

My dad was right (darn him), it truly was a mess.

I had of burst of nervous jitters in my tummy now that Ari was on the threshold of my room. I did a quick scan to make sure there wasn’t anything super embarrassing like dirty underwear in plain sight. Nothing too bad, just the normal hodgepodge. I hadn’t felt nervous at all when we were downstairs, but being alone in my room felt different somehow.

I started picking up the dirty clothes and putting them in my hamper. I didn’t want Ari to smell anything foul and think I was a heathen. He was doing the same hover-in-the-doorway thing he’d done in my dad’s office so I decided to put on some music, hoping to set a more relaxing mood.

I chose Abbey Road, basically the most perfect record ever made.

“I can’t believe you have an actual record player,” he said.

“It was my mom’s. She was going to throw it away. Can you believe that? Vinyl. Real vinyl. None of this cassette crap.”

“What’s wrong with cassettes?”

“I don’t trust them.”

He laughed at that. But I sort of knew he would before I said it. “Records scratch easily,” he said.

“Not if you take care of them.”

He gave my room a thorough once over. “I can see that you really like to take care of things.”

He had me there. I laughed and handed him a book of poems that was sitting on my nightstand. William Carlos Williams. I had been reading it last night before I went to bed and had a dream I was stringing up a mountainous stack of white sheets, shirts and dresses on a clothesline in the middle of a prairie field while a big storm was brewing overhead. The white sheets flapped in the wind like a whip. I liked the dream though it was unsettling, too. Good poetry will do that to you.

There was a particular poem called “Icarus” that when I read it last night it reminded me of Ari. I wanted to tell him that, but I thought he might think that was a little strange, telling him I was thinking about him while I was reading poetry. So I handed him the book, instead. Maybe he’d read the same poem and think of me and we’d both be none the wiser. “Here, you can read this while I clean my room.”

“Maybe I should just, you know, leave you—” he said and flicked his hair forward. I could still see his eyes looking all around my room. “It’s a little scary in here.”

Scary, ouch. I mean, my room was a little chaotic maybe, but I wouldn’t go so far as to call it scary. Ari and my dad seemed to be on the same page about the optimal cleanliness of rooms, I guess.

“Don’t,” I said. “Don’t leave.” (I really didn’t want him to leave). “I hate cleaning my room.”

“Maybe if you didn’t have so many things.”

I looked around. To someone else’s eyes I could see how it could leave the impression that a tornado had just breezed through: clothes, shoes, books, records, notepads, polaroids, sheet music, old homework assignments and tests, and all the pictures I’d torn out of magazines for my inspiration board were scattered everywhere and covered nearly every available surface. Yeah, I guess there was a lot of stuff, but who doesn’t have a lot of stuff?

“It’s just stuff. If you stay, it won’t be so bad.”

“Ok, should I help?”

“No. It’s my job.” I knew my mom would really tear into me if she found out I’d roped my new friend into cleaning my room for me. I’d never hear the end of it. And knowing me, I wouldn’t be able to not tell her. That’s the funny part.

We chatted a bit about our moms and dads. Ari hadn’t told me much about his parents and I was curious what they were like, how Ari got along with them. It seemed like Ari had magically entered my life like Athena emerging fully grown out of Zeus’ skull and I was having trouble picturing him as a baby or with his family. I told him that I understood my dad—heck, I’d had his number since I was a little kid. My mom, not so much. She’s a psychiatrist and helps teenagers for her job and so she knows how to keep her cards close. My dad and I are more alike. Both big open books. Ari, he was more like my mom, I realized: inscrutable in certain ways, clear as day in others.

“Read that book while I clean.”

He opened it up and thumbed through a few pages. He looked up at me and I could read it on his face that poetry was not his thing.

“Poetry,” I said. “It won’t kill you.”

“What if it does? Boy Dies of Boredom While Reading Poetry.”

I tried to keep a straight face—after all poetry is an important art form and has a bad rap!—but that worked just as well as it always works when Ari is looking at me with the corner of his lips upturned in a half-smirk and a sparkling gleam in his dark brown eyes. I shook my head in mock offense and started attacking the monster task of getting my room in order.

My comfy reading chair had become a catch-all receptacle for all the random things I hadn’t bothered putting away over the last few weeks so I told him to clear it off so he could sit there and read.

“What’s this?” he asked, picking up one of my sketch pads.

I froze momentarily.

“A sketch pad.”

“Can I see?”

I shook my head no. “I don’t like to show it to anyone.”

It wasn’t that I was embarrassed about my drawing skills or that I thought Ari wouldn’t appreciate some of the drawings I’d done—in fact I bet he’d especially dig the comic book characters I liked to do sometimes for fun. But there were a few drawings in there of a boy sitting on the edge of a pool that I didn’t want him to see.

I picked up the pad and put it away on my desk and changed the subject back to the book of poetry. “Really, it won’t kill you.”

Ari sighed dramatically but then settled in to reading with little complaint after that. While I cleaned up I snuck quick peaks at him to see how he was enjoying it. His eyebrows were knitted together the whole time he read and he had a habit of biting his lower lip when he was really concentrating (I had noticed this at the pool as well when I was giving him detailed instructions) but he kept at it until he’d read the whole book.

Late afternoon in my room is my favorite time of day. I have westward facing windows and when the golden light spills in you can see little dust particles floating in the air in an almost sparkly and magical way sometimes. The light hit the white pages of Ari’s book and it reflected back up onto his face, making him glow almost.

After Abbey Road was done I switched on Pink Moon. I’d found the record at a junk shop and liked the surreal picture on the cover so I bought it even though I’d never heard of Nick Drake before. It quickly became one of my favorite records.

Believe it or not, I do have a system once I get going organizing my room. Books especially. My shelf is alphabetical by author’s last name (the library way) and my ‘to-read’ pile on my desk goes in ascending order of excitement about reading. Once all the dirty clothes are in my hamper it’s pretty easy to sort the rest of my clothes out, too. I like folding everything in neat stacks by type of clothes (undershirts, tshirts, button down shirts, shorts, pants) and by color. I find it soothing to see them all stacked up in rainbow order in my drawer. My painting and drawing area also needed some attention. I organized my drawing pencils, charcoals, pens and paints in my plastic storage bins. I soaped up all my paintbrushes that had gotten stiff. I organized my records, alphabetical by artist.

Every now and then Ari would make a “hmm” noise or a soft grunt. I was dying to ask him what he thought about the poems he was reading but I kept focused on my room. The sooner I finished, the more time we’d have to talk and hang out.

I finished up my room and looked around, satisfied with my work. I took the book of poems from Ari. I found one I particularly liked called “Death” (uplifting title, right?), which is about a dead dog. Whenever I read this poem I thought of Ringo, my old dog. There’s a picture of us on my bulletin board. He was old when he died. He had cancer. Reading the poem aloud felt almost like giving him a eulogy again (I had insisted my parents and I all give speeches when we buried him). It still hurt thinking about him, but I liked how reading the poem aloud made my memories of him feel alive inside me. Like I was marking an important moment by remembering him aloud, even if the remembering was only for myself. I didn’t tell Ari about Ringo just then because I was afraid I might tear up. I knew I’d tell him one day, though.

He’s dead the dog won’t have to sleep on the potatoes anymore to keep them from freezing

he’s dead the old bastard—

I smiled at that last word, thinking of Ringo and also because here, alone in my room with Ari, I had free reign to say curse words like ‘bastard’ without the cluck of my mom’s tongue or my dad’s raised eyebrow. We had our own rules up here, ones that we could make up on our own, together.

While I was reading aloud, Ari had shut his eyes. Not because he was sleeping or bored, but because I think he was really trying to listen to the words. His face was peaceful then. The crease between his eyebrows smoothed over. I felt bold enough to continue reading more poems to him. I wanted to keep that peaceful look on his face for as long as I could.

When I got to “Icarus”, my heart started beating fast, I don’t know why. It’s not like he would know that when I read the beautiful words I imagined Ari falling from the sky like a shooting star and landing in a sparkling, clear blue sea with barely a splash.

According to Brueghel when Icarus fell it was spring

a farmer was ploughing his field the whole pageantry

of the year was awake tingling near

the edge of the sea concerned with itself

sweating in the sun that melted the wings’ wax

unsignificantly off the coast there was

a splash quite unnoticed this was Icarus drowning

My voice quivered a little when I read the last line. If Ari asked about it I could just claim it was allergies.

#ari and dante fic #aaddtsotu

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