#i need my daily dose of serotonin

[dreamymcqueen]

Hi guys!! Happy new year!♡

So happy to hear that we're gonna have new cars content soon, what a way to start the year!!!

I hope I'll get to make new edits and gifs soon, but in the meantime, here some cuteness:

[wearily-confused]

kitty cat kitty cat where you at

it's been a while (a whole day) since I came across a cat pic on my dash gtg look for them now

[kxsagi]

Hiiii!! I like your account very much and the way you write is great. I thought something like, sae x fem reader, reader is cheerful, understanding, playful and talkative. She's always the one who initiates the conversation, the contact with Sae. But one day, she's worried that Sae is uncomfortable, so she doesn't talk to him or hug him, so what if Sae noticed?

“𝐯𝐢𝐭𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐧 𝐃 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐝𝐫𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐥 𝐬𝐲𝐦𝐩𝐭𝐨𝐦𝐬”

a/n: thank you so much!!! this was kinda easy to write bc i am definitely this type of person lol

also, guys i swear i see requests in my inbox, i write them down for future reference, and when i’m about to write them, they’re like gone??? 😭

like i was gonna write it, i just need a couple days because i have other things going on, and i will respond if i am not comfortable writing it lol

(art credits go to immmso_ko on X)

sae itoshi isn’t used to being the one who reaches out first. 

he doesn’t need to. 

not when you’re around. 

you, with your sunshine grin and warm hands. you, who waltz into his life every morning like you’re the human embodiment of a golden retriever with a caffeine addiction. 

you, who hum off-key to whatever song’s been rotting in your brain all week. who pops into the kitchen just to press a surprise kiss to his cheek and dramatically declare, “that was your daily serotonin dose. you’re welcome.” 

you, who casually slip your fingers under the hem of his shirt when you hug him just to be a little nuisance about it. “oh wow, your back is so warm. you’re like a human heater. lucky me.” 

sae rolls his eyes every time. pretends to be annoyed. but he never stops you. 

and maybe that’s the problem. 

because now, he’s starting to think he’s been too good at pretending. 

it takes him a while to figure out what feels off. 

at first, he thinks maybe he’s just in a fouler mood than usual. his teammates were particularly slow during training. his coach was nagging more than necessary. the post-practice traffic was a nightmare. 

but then he walks into the apartment. 

and it hits him. 

the space is… quiet. too quiet. 

no overenthusiastic “sae!! you’re home!!” followed by you practically launching yourself at him like a feral cat on catnip. no sudden, unsolicited dance breaks in the kitchen while you wait for the water to boil. not even a playful jab about how he never texts you when he’s on his way home. 

just… silence. 

he finds you on the couch, scrolling through your phone. when you glance up and smile, it’s small. polite. the kind you’d give to a coworker you barely tolerate. 

okay. weird. 

he figures maybe you’re just tired. long day or whatever. but no, even when he sits next to you, you don’t do… anything. 

you don’t tuck your legs over his lap. you don’t lean against him or comb your fingers through his hair like you usually do when he’s within a five-foot radius. 

you’re not touching him. 

the realization makes his eye twitch. 

he’s not even being subtle about his staring at this point. he’s glaring at you like you’ve personally wronged him. and you, being the self-aware ray of sunshine that you are, notice immediately. 

"what’s wrong?" you ask softly. 

he narrows his eyes. "you tell me." 

you blink. "huh?" 

"you’re acting weird," he says bluntly, and you blink again, caught off guard by the sharpness in his voice. 

"what? no, i’m not," you say with a too-quick shake of your head. 

he squints at you. unimpressed. he’s not letting this go. 

"you are," he deadpans, voice low and flat. 

and that’s when you start to sweat. 

you glance away, suddenly very interested in the coffee table. "i’m not," you mutter under your breath, fidgeting with the hem of your sleeve. 

but he’s not buying it. 

"yes, you are." 

"no, i’m not." 

"you are." 

"i’m not." 

he leans forward slightly, elbows resting on his knees. his eyes narrow further. "you are." 

"i’m not!!" 

a brief, heated staring contest ensues. 

… you lose. obviously. 

you sigh, slumping back against the couch. your shoulders sink slightly, and for the first time tonight, you look… sheepish. almost guilty. 

"i just…" you exhale softly, voice quieter than before. "i didn’t want to be… too much." 

his eyes flicker. "what?" he mutters. 

your fingers pick at a loose thread in your sleeve, suddenly avoiding his gaze again. 

"i wasn’t sure if you liked it when i… y’know, talk so much. or cling to you all the time. you never… complain or anything, but you never really initiate either, so…" you trail off, your voice growing smaller. "i thought maybe you were just putting up with it. so i didn’t want to, like… overwhelm you or make you uncomfortable." 

sae stares at you. 

and suddenly, he feels like a massive fucking idiot. 

because here you are, walking on eggshells around him – him – when all you’ve ever done is make his life warmer. brighter. easier. 

and what did he do? 

he let you think he didn’t want it. 

he presses his lips into a thin line. swallows down the brief twinge of self-loathing and quietly reaches for your hand. 

the moment his fingers brush against yours, you freeze slightly. but when he intertwines them with deliberate slowness, you blink, clearly caught off guard. 

"don’t do that again," he mutters, voice low but steady. "don’t pull away." 

your brows furrow slightly, confused. "but i thought –" 

"don’t," he cuts you off, and you immediately fall silent. he squeezes your hand slightly, his thumb brushing over your knuckles, gaze unwavering. 

"i like it," he mutters, voice a little strained, almost like the words are foreign to him. "when you talk. when you touch me. i…" he inhales sharply, eyes narrowing slightly, almost annoyed at himself for being so bad at this. "i like it. alright?" 

you blink at him, wide-eyed. 

he waits for you to say something. anything. 

but then you just… burst into laughter. 

his eyes narrow slightly, but before he can ask what the hell is so funny, you’re suddenly climbing into his lap. 

and for once, he doesn’t flinch. 

he exhales sharply when your arms wrap around his neck, pressing yourself against him like you’re trying to fuse your body with his. your fingers immediately find their way under his shirt, cool palms pressing against his bare skin like they belong there. 

"you’re such a grump," you mumble into his shoulder, voice muffled but clearly teasing. "but you’re my grump." 

he rolls his eyes, exasperated. but his arms tighten around you anyway. 

"don’t push your luck," he mutters. 

but he makes no effort to let you go. 

© 𝐤𝐱𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐢

[separatist-apologist]

I'm in a really bad mood from this fandomand their bullshits. I need you to wake up cause at this point you, LB and only a few are the sane people in this fandom and I need my daily dose of serotonin from you guys</3

I started to ask what was happening and then decided I didn't want to know. Tell me nothing

[darl-ingfics]

🪲🐝🎨

🪲 ⇢ add 50 words to your current wip and share the paragraph here

Oooo, forcing me to actually write, I see you... lol. This is from a piece I've said nothing about yet, but the inspiration has been striking:

Namjoon needed three things: sleep, a gallon of water, several doses of Tylenol, and sleep. Okay, that was four, but technically only three because sleep was on there twice. But Namjoon really, really just wanted to go to bed. 

They’d been in the US for nearly two weeks. Two weeks in which Namjoon had had to keep track of his members, while also keeping track of all of his own belongings, which was a feat on its own. Two weeks of running through airports and catching flights and playing the never-ending game of ‘smile at that camera, run from this one.’ Two weeks of talk shows, interviews, performances, concerts, photo shoots, content filming, sightseeing, and so much more. 

And, most importantly, two weeks of non-stop translating for his six very talkative yet very much not-fluent-in-English-speaking members.

🐝 ⇢ tag your biggest supporter(s) and say one nice thing about them

OOOOOOOO!!! So fun but so stressful, cause I don't want to leave anyone out!

@fairyniceyeah is such a sweet soul, and a joy to chat with, about fics and otherwise. I really appreciate fairy's presence in this community, and the compassion that comes so naturally to them 🩷

@17snifflesandsnzes always leaves me the most wonderful comments, and I get excited whenever I see their name in my notes. I also definitely don't stalk their blog daily... just in case... cause I don't want to miss their writing.

@sickonthedancefloor reblogs all of my fics and it makes me heart just soar! I love reading Whit's writing too, and feel such positive energy from them.

@lovesnzs-blog @leedoesnotkn0w @whats-k-popping @suraandsugar @nastanperfekt among others, I see yours names pop up in my notes frequently, and it instantly boosts my serotonin, and I can't thank you enough for your love <3 <3 <3

🎨 ⇢ link your favourite piece of fanart and explain why you like it

This is a hard one, cause I've actually been out of the fanart sphere for a while. I was much more into it back in my anime days, and I feel weird tagging those artists on this blog cause it's a separate thing. Sorry that's such a lame answer!

Writer's Truth or Dare Asks

[k1ra0nloose]

This is infact not fine

First of all glitch WHY I've been observing you guys since 2017 why just why and 2nd of all I'm still watching smg4 vids I need my daily dose of serotonin and 3rd of all I obviously do not support what glitch is doing and Im not gonna buy any merch not like I had any money AHEM

[minister-of-joy]

I need my daily dose of serotonin, say something pookie wookie

Smile always! Ha ha

[whatever-letmebe]

KinnPorsche fic recs

I read some amazing KP fics in the last few days and I need to scream about them for a while.

First up is to be my end. (3867 words) by evaniigouki Chapters: 1/1 Rating: Explicit Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Pete Phongsakorn Saengtham/Vegas Kornwit Theerapanyakun Characters: Pete Phongsakorn Saengtham, Vegas Kornwit Theerapanyakun Additional Tags: Post-Canon, BDSM, Undernegotiated Kink, Smoking, Subdrop, Domdrop, Temperature Play, Painplay, Self-Harm, Kinda, Rimming, Anal Fingering, Wet & Messy, Anal Sex, Aftercare Summary: “Why did you— fuck, Pete. Why did you do that?” He’s shaking worse than Pete is, trembling fingers ghosting over the unnatural twist of bone pushing up against muscle not meant to hold it. His eyes are wild. Pete leans forward and kisses his cheek. “I didn’t want to be there any more. You’re going to have to help me with this.” Vegas does something Pete doesn’t like. Pete takes the situation into his own hands.

*** This one, y'all, this one unlocked something inside me. It is extremely good. It's all about sensations and want and need. It's Vegas/Pete in its rawest form. (If you're somebody who seeks out physical pain to cope with emotions, this might be triggering / put you in a dangerous headspace.) I love how evaniigouki describes what Pete is feeling and I also love how even though this is entirely from Pete's POV, Vegas is still very much there as well.

***

Okay, next up, something very different but equally good: At the end of your fingertips, us (13267 words) by nubeazul Chapters: 4/4 Rating: Mature Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Big/Chan (KinnPorsche: The Series) Characters: Big (KinnPorsche: The Series), Chan (KinnPorsche: The Series) Additional Tags: a sprinkle of angst and lots of comfort, Idiots in Love, big is hurt and he’s being stubborn about it, chan doesn't like that, so he takes matters into his owns hands, LITERALLY, no beta we die like elizabeth and sebastian, Slow Burn, there's now ART!!!, link in notes on chapter 2 Summary: “Why didn’t you say anything?” Chan asks, and it’s suddenly very obvious that it was not disappointment what he thought he saw in his expression. It was worry. Concern. There's a lump in Big's throat. He can't get any air in. “I didn't think it was important,” he says truthfully, his voice coming out in a whisper. Something flickers in Chan's expression, quick as lighting. It's gone before Big can pinpoint what it was. Or: Chan helps Big get dressed in the mornings. Big tries to pretend he feels normal about that.

*** I read this while waiting for my train which was delayed for 40 minutes, I couldn't stop smiling and I almost exploded from having to keep my reactions and my excited stimming to a minimum. It's one of the best slow-burns I've ever read. It's extremely frustrating but in the most delicious way possible and the pay-off in the end it great. Don't worry if you never particularly thought or cared about Big or Chan before this, it doesn't matter, it's still worth a read, I promise. *** Alright, now that you've had your daily dose of serotonin, how about something depressing and painful? A Stomach For It (9533 words) by 99_9 Chapters: 1/1 Rating: Mature Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Khun Tankhun Theerapanyakun & Kim Khimhant Theerapanyakun & Kinn Anakinn Theerapanyakun, Pete Phongsakorn Saengtham & Khun Tankhun Theerapanyakun Characters: Korn Theerapanyakun's Wife, Korn Theerapanyakun, Arm (KinnPorsche: The Series), Pol (KinnPorsche: The Series), Chan (KinnPorsche: The Series) Additional Tags: background canon relationships, Implied/Referenced Torture, Kidnapping, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Mother-Son Relationship, Kim Khimhant Theerapanyakun Needs a Hug, Wakes & Funerals, Protective Khun Tankhun Theerapanyakun, Tankhun: mafia HR manager, Tankhun: master of disguises, Tankhun: good at chess, sex-repulsed Tankhun, Literacy, Suicidal Thoughts, Underage Drinking Series: Part 9 of A Wholeness Summary: When Khun wakes up from his multi-day nightmare, Mama is sitting next to his bed.  She is wearing her white floral Thakoon day dress, but her manicure doesn't match the little roses and her hair is still plaited back, like she wears it to sleep and to sleep only.  In Tankhun’s dehydrated hallucinations, she was always perfectly coiffed and wearing her vintage burgundy silk midi dress, Khun’s favourite because of the way the silk is shot through with gold thread, and it never occurred to him she’d skip a manicure. Mama’s here, and she’s real this time.  Tankhun is safe now.  He pushes himself up on his elbow, still shaky and achy, and reaches for her. - Tankhun, before and after canon, decides what his limits are.

This fic takes us back to the Theerapanyakul brothers' childhoods, more specifically Tankhun's childhood. I love fics from Tankhun's POV and this is one of the best I've read so far. It made me cry a lot. It's part of a series but can be read as a standalone work. (But if your are anything like me, you might end up spending an entire weekend reading every fic of that series 🙈) *** And now as a Bonus: flowers on your head (1227 words) by unprettybarbie Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: รักโคตรร้ายสุดท้ายโคตรรัก | KinnPorsche: The Series (TV) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Porsche Pachara Kittisawat/Vegas Kornwit Theerapanyakun Characters: Porsche Pachara Kittisawat, Vegas Kornwit Theerapanyakun, Macau Theerapanyakun Additional Tags: Mutual Attraction, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Porsche Puts A Flower Crown On Vegas, Macau Is A Little Shit But Vegas Loves Him Anyway, no beta we die like daddy chan Series: Part 2 of VegasPorsche™️ Summary: Porsche is merely teasing but Vegas can feel the heat slowly crawl up his back. *** This is a short and sweet fic about Porsche and Macau making flower crowns. Vegas joins them. I love it a lot!

[ideas-4-stories]

I seriously can't tell you (or anyone) how much I love your blog bc you mention many of my interest, that you use as an example or something and everytime it happens I am close to bursting with serotonin. Where have you been all my life. I needed someone who writes/posts about cross guild polycule correctly and you are that someone. I love your posts sm, it had become my daily dose of serotonin. *explodes*

*Goes and explodes with you*

Thank you so, I try my best to make sure their personalities are much like their canon counterparts, because I don't really like when the characters aren't like themselves. Thank you again for this

It all happened because of a silly clown, I like clowns while the cartoon/anime ones. I just want to give Buggy a hug and kisses

[phantomskeep]

Some rough draft character designs for a Bloodclan AU I've been brainstorming. Yes, Rusty/Firestar joins Bloodclan. No, Bloodclan isn't 100% evil. Tigerstar still is, though.

This entire AU was heavily inspired by a very wonderful band called Ghost, so you might be able to peep a couple of secrets hidden in some designs ;) Ghost lore is a rabbithole that gives me my daily dose of serotonin.

Basis of the AU is:

Normal thing happens with Tiny vs Tigerpaw, but Tiny ends up meeting Barley's mother in the city instead of a bunch of salty alley cats. Tiny shares his food with the mom (who I started calling Jinx cause poor lady doesn't have a canon name) and she kind of adopts him to be her kitten's older brother. A dog attacks Jinx and her babies, and Tiny puts all his PTSD rage to good use and kills the dog (which is small, like a jack russell or something). Jinx thanks him, and then rumors go around about a dog-killing cat. Tiny changes his name, as he takes what his mother (Quince) said and changes it to be a "Scourge for the name of all good cats" because the city is overrun with angry dogs.

Scourge then creates Bloodclan to help protect cats from dogs, teaching them how to fight. Eventually he finds Rusty wandering the streets and finds out the poor kiddo was beaten up by the now-named Tigerclaw. Scourge takes Rusty under his wing and they make Bloodclan great again.

I'm planning on making this AU into a 12 part animatic series. Most of the scripts are written, all the songs are chosen, I just need to actually sit down and draw them out.

Anyways, keep going down to see a few of the designs. Any feedback is welcome <3

Rusty:

Tigerpaw:

Bone:

And finally, Scourge:

Feedback is very appreciated :D

[patchbadger]

Hello it's been 7 years on this website and I come with raccoon paws scratching at your window pane.

TLDR: I'm supporting 3- 6 humans, a mortgage, inflated electric bills, student loans, basic needs, and working as the sole provider and now I cannot afford my medicine that prevents my migraines. If you want cheap art I am here hi just remember I'm colorblind so colors won't be perfect.

I take many medications for my migraine condition. I take a daily preventative, an abortive when I have a migraine, and then I have a monthly preventative that is an injectable. I need all of these to get me down to 6 or 8 migraines a month. If it rains I have more but this is with medication. If I do not have one of these medications I have migraines daily and if I encounter a trigger like not getting enough sleep, the weather changing, smoking, etc I'll get knocked out.

Unfortunately I have brainstem migraines which impacts my speech and ability to move in my environment. I continue to work through my migraines because I have literally no choice. I basically look and sound drunk it's horribly embarrassing.

This impacts my ability to drive too. If it strikes at work I need to uber home because my coworkers won't drive me home and no one else has a license.

If I miss one dose of any of my medications it sets off a migraine conga line qs I like to call it and I begin having migraines every 2- 3days and the longer I am off it the more migraines I steadily have.

It's hell.

My migraine medication is 208$. I am currently the only working adult for a household of three and there will soon be three children here for the summer.

Unfortunately I had serotonin syndrome a few weeks ago as some of you know and that had me out of work for a week and a half. Meaning I lost a week and a half pay check. Which may not seem like much but we live in constant poverty and are food insecure.

Literally every dollar counts in our precarious position.

The electricity company in western New York is super charging its customers so a regular electric bill for a house using less electric than average is 300- 500$ a month. Which is just a little less than our mortgage

We currently owe over a 1,000 in back pay, there isn't any relief for individuals who cannot pay the inflated rates. It's totally crazy but I need my medication. I can call the electric company and beg but I can't beg for my medicine.

My field also experiences a drop in attendence in the summer and due to my health my boss I'd trying to reduce my hours to help my body recover. That's great and all but it doesn't help me get the money I need for my injection.

My student loans are 875$ a month and I'm on the lowest payment plan and the government just sold my loans to a private company so I will be paying additional loans soon.

As you can see I have a lot on my plate but I just need that migraine medicine so I can work through it. I do a lot of passive income through survey junkies but I can't do those activities when I'm migraining.

All the images below are works in progress

Basic pencil and ink illustration

Comic book pages 15- 30 depending on content and number of pages.

if you want a comic badly and feel OK with my abilities we can work on a manageable and low price to make multiple pages happen. So bulk pages will be cheaper.

Comic book featured custom outlets??? Just resin customized outlet covers???

Can do

Painting I mean I'm trying it but if you'd like one hmu man

I tinker around with a lot of stuff

I also like to find old toys/statues and remake them so if youre interested in my raccoon art that stuff is up for new homes that will appreciate their unique beauty and love them for who they are.

Thanks for your attention and happy scrolling!!

[distopea]

𝐆𝐄𝐓 𝐓𝐎 𝐊𝐍𝐎𝐖 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐌𝐔𝐍

NAME : Miho

PRONOUNS : I never cared! I mostly go she/her, or she/they, I don't take offense if you call me differently

PREFERENCE OF COMMUNICATION : I prefer discord all the way down! I don't think tumblr is really convenient for chatting and it's easier for me to understand that someone is actually messaging me there. Plus imagine if I ever get fucking shadow banned again gfsydugf

MOST ACTIVE MUSE : The roster ✨Honestly, I can't lie that my mafia muses are often the most active, it comes and goes depending on the motivation of the day! A living nightmare sometimes fdsyg

EXPERIENCE / HOW MANY YEARS : I started RPing in different platforms when I was 12 years old and today I'm 27. Basically that's my most regular hobby so I'm quite used to how it works and I love it profoundly!

BEST EXPERIENCE : Here! It's been three years I'm active on this blog and I truly found my purpose in the RP world. I can have multiple muses and different plots, I have awesome interactions and I'm no more fandom dependent. It's truly the best! (even more when you find your writing soulmates, and you can even develop a live friendship and such, only a wonderful bonus 🙏)

RP PET PEEVE : I have several, but I will voice those I have mostly written in my rules. I really don't like drama in any form, so basically when I see a "drama" tag and names or screenshots dropped, I just block and move on, I don't need that toxicity so it's a forever bye bye on my side. The second main RP pet peeve would be spamming thirst posts and NSFW icons all day long until it clogs the dash, and basically there's nothing left for actual plotting except a perpetual "thirst" for one fictional blorbo. The finale one is constant threads drops with no notification ever. I do drop threads, but I noticed that a few blogs looking for a daily dose of serotonine are just constantly dropping whatever you start with them and it's frustrating on my hand because I tend to be slow so...

PLOTS OR MEMES : Plot is very VERY important for me. I can get the satisfaction of starting something quick and all, but my interest and focus will vanish when there's no plot at all and no story to follow. It's a part of my guilty pleasure, to gush with someone in DM and imagine scenario regarding the next steps! Plots all the way down, my longer and oldest threads are all plotted and I LOVE them.

LONG OR SHORT REPLIES : I'm adaptable, but truly, I know I don't really enjoy short threads. I need material to voice my muses and they have quite a lot to say, a bit of details and context... Otherwise it's getting complicated to push the story forward (for plotted threads at least). I would say medium-long is the perfect length for me!

ARE YOU LIKE YOUR MUSES : Nope, that's for sure, but I have always used a bit of my own persona to build things, like an inch of myself to know how a muse would react to something and all. But basically, I'm a potato compared to my whole roster and I'm glad I have nothing alike with them. Imagine being like a Vex or a Kaizen gsdygf

[bluering8]

dear diary (tumblr) today i experienced the horrifying realisation that i'm the meme of dads standing around watching construction sites irl. you don't understaaand it's on my way home from wooork every day it is the most interesting thing which has happened to me in over eight hours!! admittedly sometimes during my commute i get to see a cool bug but this is unpredictable and i cannot rely on it for my daily serotonin dose i need to little a admire the Construction Site, as a treat

[the-ineffable-bookworm]

My poor humble bookworm soul just left my body and just in time before work, soon.

❤🤩🤯😭😱

Excuse me and please standby while I'm going to retrieve it, because it's floating off at the speed of light to the very end of the universe.

....I'm legit crying over here but it are tears of joy, excitement and utter shock and trying my hardest to hold back my squealing screams because of my throat/cold. I think I'll have to give it a rewatch a couple of times because it's a LOT to unpack-

Four years of waiting have come to an end and the Ineffable fandom has finally been fed the very few glimpses we needed to sate our eager and burning excitement with the official trailer.

Finally

Thank you Neil Gaiman (& the late sir Terry Pratchett), thank you thank you thank you thank you. Also thank you Amazon Prime and literally everyone who worked on Good Omens (this goes for both the original book and its unfinished/discontinued sequel & the TV series adaptation) from the bottom of my heart. 🙏❤Yes I'm giving all of you a massive Ineffable hug- 🤗

My day can't get any better than this and I'm certainly going to struggle concentrating when heading back into work again because my Good Omens brainrot has once again been activated. A strong brainrot which my colleagues, my parents, siblings and everyone else will have to deal with as that's going to be their problem up until July 28th 2023 and beyond.

Bless today, honestly. What would've been another simple (boring) Wednesday for me just became an Ineffable one, with a massive cherry on top.

Again, thank you for my daily dose of serotonin.

Seriously though, Good Omens is such a big Ineffable comfort for me and makes the sometimes gloomy or boring days just a little bit brighter which is all I need. That and a mug of hot chocolate with whipped cream and a good book, even in during the Summer months. Jeez I sound like Aziraphale.

...Now we just have to gnaw away at the time that's left still and wait for the remaining days to pass until July 28th 2023.

To July 28th 2023 and my approaching Summervacation in a couple of weeks!!

Going to lock myself inside of my house and livingroom July 28th (not really just kidding, don't think I can but I'll try-).

THE TRAILER FOR GOOD OMENS 2 IS HERE! 🥳❤❤❤

[lunarsilkscreen]

Anti-Anxiety Medication

So I've been considering what [hearing voices] means in context as it *is* something that has happened to me during periods of [chronic exhaustion] at work. More on that later.

And also; what do Anti-Anxiety meds and Anti-Psychotics actually do and *feel* like? And why does either assist with [hearing and/or seeing things] {one might relate to a dream}.

But more on those *exact* things in a future post.

At 50 milligrams effectiveness. (0.5 for stronger medications) Something about [increments of five] seem to be consistent in my personal calculations. Not sure exactly why *except* big-pharma having standards of some kind.

At about that *total* effectiveness of various anti-whatevers is about all my body can handle on a daily basis. (More in depth about ssris and or whatever later)

After that the medication builds up in my system, and starts increasing the symptoms that were attempting to be medicated.

Personally; it *feels* like my body being shunted to match its *natural* [circadian rhythm] this is important because my natural CR is [night owl].

It is painfully difficult for me to stick to a [day shift schedule] waking up "early" [earlier than noon] is akin to torture.

Extends periods of *that* is when I start *hearing* [things from Dreamland]. Which seems to coincide with my consistent complaints about [day people] forcing me to stick to *their* schedules going unheard.

At higher doses I get angry and very close to how we envision [psychosis] as a people {not the actual definition.

The one where the psychotic is extremely angry and prone to violence in [some direction]. Seemingly arbitrary and *random*.

I mean. They literally turn off a person's ability to *feel* dopamine and serotonin. Locking a person into an FoF{fight or flight} state.

AND *may* have contributed towards freezing my muscles in place and making my [arthritic back] solidify faster than would have been otherwise.

It *is* a first-hand account in need of peer review, after-all.

What's actually happening then, is the medication creates a bit of anxious stress and then allows the body to relax. IN small enough doses! And remembering half-life builds up in a body during durations of daily intake.

Meaning dosage increases during titration *may* be wholly unnecessary as the full-effect of a dosage won't be felt until weeks later.

During extend FoF-states; days at a time of complaining about constant anxiety especially during increased dosages of a medication that are actively making the symptoms worse...

I have a lot of pent-up aggression towards certain staff that may or may not've [neglectfully attempted to end my life] it's *really* coloring my biases right now.

But if you experienced the panic attack I felt in an environment meant to prevent exactly that... It would feel intentional to you too.

Especially if it had happened more than once, and your complaints seem to have been filed in some [trash can] instead of documented...

That extended duration in FoF, as I've stated, forces the body to operate in a kind of sleep-wake state. Creating a situation where [waking dreams] [hallucinations] [seeing/hearing things] is inevitable

Because the body isn't entering the [repair cycle] that it is supposed to get from [proper sleep hygiene] which can't happen [because of stated FoF Lock]

That is a precarious observation that *shouldn't* be ignored, considering the ramifications it may have on certain mental health practitioners [as a whole].

Like I said, there's still a whole theory and chart to draw about Circadian Rhythm, anti-whatevers, and the whole experience of what *I believe* to be the case about how these medications actually work {that do not seem to be [in the documentation]}.

A lot of extremely valuable information it seems.

[the-invisible-queer]

https://www.tumblr.com/the-invisible-queer/760112199401455616/i-have-absolutely-no-recollection-of-taking-my

This is literally me but I don’t have a differerent box for each day, I know I should

I need my pillbox because I am forgetful IF I took my pill and I'm not about to take a double dose and get serotonin syndrome

I usually take my morning meds with my tea

I only take 2 meds daily but I got a grandpa pill box

After I take my morning med I flip it so bed is closest to the opening so I can take ny sleep med and then I flip it back to remind myself I took my meds