#i need her so bad you don't understand

[snugglesquiggle]

why dont more people talk about illurien

A dancing array of droplets swirls before you. In the midst of this storm stands a slender but extremely tall female clad in gray robes. She has no facial features other than her vivid blue eyes. With a graceful motion, she beckons to you. A strange creature composed of countless tears and raindrops, Illurien of the Myriad Glimpses is a collector of information and a keeper of secrets. She is fascinated by the contents of other minds, believing it is her right to obtain and preserve such knowledge for herself.

Strategies and Tactics: llurien engages those she meets in polite telepathic conversation, but this behavior is just an excuse to examine their minds. Once Illurien has selected the brightest intellect among her chosen targets, she moves in, subjecting her foes to her storm of visions. She uses her tempest lash to deal Intelligence damage to her preferred enemy, relying on her cloud of foresight to foil that opponent’s defenders. During combat, she sometimes uses her pointed knowledge to intimidate and threaten her opponents. If pressed, she uses plane shift to flee to the Athenaeum Nefarious (see Environment). Illurien travels the planes in search of knowledge and mysteries to steal and keep for herself. Sample Encounter: Illurien has come to steal information from one of the PCs’ sagacious allies. She talked with that NPC for a while, then attacked him, drained him of intelligence, and slew him. After the murder, Illurien methodically inspected the slain man’s organs and body parts to see his specific internal workings. The characters now have a grisly murder to solve, and the corpse, drained of much of its knowledge, utters only the name “Illurien” if questioned with a speak with dead spell.

Ecology: Illurien is a unique native of the Concordant Domain of the Outlands. Where she came from and who created her, if anyone did, is a mystery. Some suspect she is a minion of Vecna, but Illurien, Vecna’s clergy, and Vecna himself say nothing on this subject. She gains sustenance through collecting knowledge, but her consumption of other minds doesn’t destroy the information she gathers. Rather, that cognition becomes a part of Illurien and her storm of visions. Illurien doesn’t otherwise eat or drink, and unlike other outsiders, she doesn’t breathe. She has no physical needs or desires beyond her thirst for erudition.

Environment: Illurien resides in an extraplanar repository referred to as the Athenaeum Nefarious, a place so well hidden in the wilderness of the Outlands that few have found it—and fewer still return from it. The library contains stacks of dark and forgotten lore, baleful traps, vile guardians, and several one-way portals to other planes. A clue to the whereabouts of this sinister vault is the perpetual storm that enshrouds it. Only Illurien can use plane shift to arrive precisely within the Athenaeum Nefarious. The Shrouded Dispensary, a building 100 miles from the center spire of the Outlands, is where those who wish to speak with Illurien can call her. She comes if she’s willing, carrying a sword of the planes (DMG 228) and protected by the effect the Outlands has on magic, spell-like abilities, and supernatural abilities. Only Illurien can use the Dispensary’s planar gate, which leads to the Athenaeum Nefarious.

Physical Characteristics: Illurien is a graceful, human-like, female figure, roughly 8 feet tall, with shimmering silver-gray skin. She has no distinct facial features other than a pair of silver-tinted eyes with blue irises. Close examination shows that she is composed entirely of iridescent droplets, but this watery composition forms organs and even bonelike structures. So, despite her elemental nature, she does have vulnerable spots. Illurien touches the ground only when she must, otherwise floating or flying everywhere she travels.

Alignment: Illurien lets no emotions stand in the way of her calculated collecting. She can feign kindness when doing so suits her ends, but pleasantries can’t sway her. She enjoys plucking information from unwilling minds, and she doesn’t care if she causes suffering, but she isn’t gratuitously violent. Illurien is neutral evil. Society: Illurien considers herself a scholar, a collector, and a sage. The knowledge she possesses is in demand. Creatures from across the planes seek Illurien’s counsel, despite her fees, which are brutally personal and coldly constructed.

Typical Treasure: Illurien rarely carries treasure, but she might be caught ferrying a tome of disturbing teachings or a mystifying item to the Athenaeum Nefarious. If she is carrying valuables, those objects are worth as much as standard treasure for Illurien’s Challenge Rating (22,000 gp). The sword she carries to the Shrouded Dispensary is worth slightly more than this total. If it occurs anywhere other than the Shrouded Dispensary, Illurien’s death spawns hints to the location of the Athenaeum Nefarious in minds recently touched by the tempest lash. Creatures that survive her attacks might be left with the ability to find Illurien’s gloomy home.

(text is from Monster Manual V for D&D 3.5e)

special shoutout to this bit of homebrew that turns her into a playable class, i first encountered it many years ago; the writing's a bit scuffed, but it's where i first encountered her, what first captured my imagination and it's through managing to track it down that i remembered any of this beyond a vague idea of watery knowledge-hunter. and oh god.

when i was young, i just thought she was cool. now, though? i think i need to sit down

[raticalshoez]

i'm having hyperfixation drought so i did what i did best and created a crossover episode

[spicymambaae]

so about the analplay do you think jmj would be into it

Mmm honestly, I think Minjeong would be weirded out but I feel like Karina would enjoy a good tongue fucking

Aeri is an anal princess tho you can't convince me otherwise 🤤

[svtskneecaps]

see everyone worried and fretted and panicked and yet quesadilla island looked at pepito and went

[skullssy]

Save me sleep deprived overworked woman, save me

[brionysea]

if stranger things 5 comes out and they're like 'omg! the upside down has been a product of someone's dark and twisted mind this whole time! it's... WILL!' I'll immediately lose interest

[kiyomitakada]

[ID copied from alt: A manga panel from Death Note showing Kiyomi Takada saying, "You're the only man I've ever actually admired… and now to find out that you're Kira… It's too amazing for words…" Her eyes are wide in awe. Light (who isn't visible on-screen) answers, "Thank you. With your help… together we can create a world with only kind-hearted people, like we used to talk about back in college." End ID]

god. she makes me sad

this is like, unprecedentedly idealistic for kiyomi, is the thing. she is the Aloof Untouchable news anchor, she's supposed to be objective, she's very opinionated (to the point where mikami picks up on her change in mood re: kira during a debate that she was moderating lmao) but her politics are generally thought-out academic things like "i think kira should enter talks with armies" etc etc. but here it's like. once you were a teenager and thought the world was unjust and wanted to get rid of the rot somehow but felt powerless to do anything. once you had a college romance that never went anywhere but here he is right in front of you, telling you that the world could be beautiful. and it's stupid and oversimplified and imperfect but god, doesn't it make you feel 18 again?

[idon-twannabeperceived]

Me: *looks up x method/ tip for curly nd coily hair*

Results: 83 videos of women with the thinnest and straightest hair u've ever seen "here's why x method doesn't work and it RUINED MY HAIR😨🚫🚫"

Me: agarrame q la mato

[godisasimp]

So my canon is that Sparkle doesn't exist and actually vita is weirdly flirting with Leyah she's already doing that well i suppose Vita just Vitad her way through everything and everything happened relatively the same and also Kiana is still in a coma playing Elden Ring DLC she was not visited by a pink weirdo.

[earl-grey-crow]

I feel like alice might've wanted to kick the pond in the shins but how do you kick an eldritch pond in the shins

[tentacleplains]

more scenes that basically everyone sees but pointing out a specific detail i find interesting: "though i hope you don't cause a scene this time" does avery regularly cause scenes at parties?? lmao

[hauntingblue]

Jayce telling vi she won't make it on her own.... okay mr. projector...

[gwydionae]

SAY IT WITH ME:

FEMALE CHARACTERS CAN BE WARRIORS AND FEMININE

MALE CHARACTERS CAN BE SMART AND MASCULINE

BEING BOTH IS NOT A "FLAW" WHERE ONE NEEDS TO BE REMOVED

IT'S CALLED "COMPLEXITY"

[the-vibing-ghoul]

some people will be all about mental health awareness and leftist ideals of at least tolerating the mentally ill who show ''ugly'' symptoms until it's someone they know and ''care'' about having a bad day and acting like it in a way they don't find appealing

[edwardallenpoe]

Me: *having a good day*

My feed: here's a video of a black woman retwisting her wife's locs!

Me: *suddenly violently I'll with need* I gotta lay down

[basofy]

i hope when the lisa definitive edition releases old and new players start to see the party members as not only a fun mechanic to progress in the game but also as their second purpose (specified even in their gang page)

which is to tell how different the people of olathe are from eachother from good to neutral to bad.

all of the party members got their own personalities, points of view and goals, which i've always been appreciative of because it makes them all feel like they're their own person and it shows that they're not going to think exactly like you just because they're on your side.

so some of them can be assholes that despise brad for different reasons and are even creepy to buddy and others can just be neutral on the whole thing or don't care about brad but don't hate him and there are others who are nice people who just want someone to hang out and get attached to brad and it pains them to betray him at the end. some of them even got someone they care about too the same way brad cares for buddy.

and all of this is made just so you don't see them only as tools, they are written this way to show you what the people of olathe are like from a closer perspective. the only other way to do this would be using npcs which would go more overlooked, and it already IS overlooked by players

becuz over time i've seen toooo many fans who speak as if absolutely every man in olathe is an asshole and a pedo, which is why they congratulate tooley too much just for being decent to buddy. i like him but you give him too much credit for something other characters do as well.

and they talk like these are just 'olathe standards' and like it's okay for this game when No, this game condemns this type of behavior at all times and it makes it very clear. it's not normal, it's just common

i mean was terry a creep towards buddy??? bo?? carp?? shocklord? birdie? nern? olan? the warlords??? and more characters and there are even npcs who deeply question the stuff going on around buddy or are simply not interested in her

and then i see takes such as "maybe x character is gay becuz they don't seem interested in buddy". pal i can think of a million better reasons to consider a character gay (sometimes no reason at all, have fun). (also again, TOOLEY. i mean he was seen at the beehive, isn't that a better reason to think he's gay??)

you don't need to be a pedo and a rapist to be attracted to women, and it's crazy how little the concept of consent matters to some people, because this isn't the only time i've seen this type of thinking over a piece of media.

this is a way of thinking that comes from people who got into lisa for the fun battles and do not understand the story, and it's sorta okay, it's fine if the battles are your favorite thing or if you're not that fond of emotional stories, but you can't ignore this part of the game, to do that you better just play something else, because my problem is that when you try to explain the emotional matters of lisa's story they never want to listen; they preffer living in their little bubble of misinterpreting everything. (like the amount of times i've tried explaining to other fans why lisa isn't worst than her goddamn dad and it's like talking to a wall) like damn, i love the battles too but i can perfectly have both things yknow.

anyway just my silly little thoughs that have been going thru my mind these past weeks, i take this game too seriously but i also feel like it's dumb not to because that's what it wants you to do.

hope things go well when the definitive edition drops and that everyone enjoys it 8)