#i miss you jonghyun

[jjongbaby]

오빠가 4월 8일에 34세가 된다는 게 믿겨지지 않아요! 보고싶다 종현아 🫶🏼

[hobaworld7]

Hey Jonghyun Oppa... (TW)

Oppa, I didn't even write the first sentence and I am already crying. You really did impact my life, for the better of course. It's the first time I wrote a letter for you. Sorry it took so much time to heal my little grieving heart.

I grow up in an unloving household. I was alone. I was lost and hurt because I never receive support. But then I saw you and all the members in that music video. You know you changed my life, Oppa? Can I even call you Oppa? I mean, after more than 11 years, almost 12 already. I feel like we both know each other pretty well.

You were my comfort when I needed it. When I needed someone to reassure me or tell me that I am worth it. When I was 14 years old, drowning under the depression, I wasn't alone, because you were there Oppa. SHINee saved me. SHINee always helped me go through every hards steps of my life. Because every time I felt sad, I would hugged that one album I had from you (Everybody) and watch funny video to cheer me up. When I was deep down in the loneliness, I would listen to your songs, and be so happy, so reassured.

But I am sorry Oppa. I left you. I left you when the intimidation became too much at school. I'm sorry Oppa. I felt ashamed at the time. I regret a lot, you know. I wish I could tell little Audrey, that everything will be alright, and she should embraces everything that makes her feel alive. And at the time it was SHINee.

And one morning, I woke up and all I could see on my cellphone was the news of your suicide attempt. We didn't know yet if you were committed. And for the first time in years I felt like my world was crashing. And I stayed in bed, crying, all day. The day after that too.

I tried to grieve. I tried to cope. I tried to get over it, like my family was telling me to do. It is just a singer. But Oppa, you are so much more than just a singer. And I did what i thought would be the best, avoid. I avoid the pain. After a week or two of crying an insane amount of tears, I started avoiding the pain. And then college started and adult life too. I wasn't able to listen to your songs every day, but they stayed my comfort option, all the time. Watching your show, SHINee solo comeback, becoming such amazing singers and adults. It made me proud. I know you must be so proud of them too, Oppa.

But I kept avoiding the pain. Until recently. My niece came to me, talking about that k-pop group she loved. And I was so proud of her. Because at her age I was already deeply in love with SHINee. I was and still am proud to share that passion with her. So we started listening and watching diverse show of BTS. And then, I told myself I should took time to see what my favorite group was into these days. Key has been going solo. Taeminie is in the military. Onew is working on a new album. Minho is all over my instagram feed. I felt proud of them Oppa. And I know you are too, because they are so strong and amazing right? Then I start listening to some videos on youtube, to get back into the SHINee world. But Oppa, tell me why they are all sad videos? I remember you as someone funny with the most beautiful voice and smile. All I could find was sad videos. And it hurts so much Oppa.

And here I am now Oppa. For the past month, I have been trying to grieve. It's hard grieving someone that impact your life that much. It is sad realizing that I will never have the chance to meet you. But I slowly start watching SHINee ot4 music videos. But, sorry Oppa, it hurts so much. But once at the time right? Gradually, I'll be okay. I swear I'll be strong enough for it.

I cried a lot lately, my grandma is really sick, my sister told me she wanted to die (she's getting help, don't worry, oppa.), i had problems at work and some old court complaint against a case of death threats and harassement that I suffered three years ago.

Every night I have so much anxiety Oppa. But your voice calms me. Always. But then I woke up, fall on some sad edit from you and cry again. It's so hard.

But I needed to write, it's my therapy. Maybe like you did when you were writing lyrics. I needed to write a letter to the one that saved my life. Because I know that without you I wouldn't be the girl I am right now. I am so thankful for you. You did well Oppa. You worked hard Oppa. You saved so many lives. You impacted so many lives, too.

I will heal Oppa. I swear I'll be okay. I just need your strength, your courage and I will be okay. I'll be okay for you Oppa. Because you saved me. Now I just want to make you proud Oppa. I hope I will.

I'll do well. I'll work hard. For you Jonghyun Oppa.

Saranghae Oppa.

Your smile is the greatest therapy.

I’ll go sleep now Jonghyun Oppa. I hope you’ll sleep well tonight too. The sunset was amazing and now the moon is shining through the night. Like you always had.

I’ll love you forever.🌹

You beloved fan, Audrey.💙

[shiningintoinfinity]

This blog has been dead for years. However, i’ve been thinking about SHINee a lot recently, and thought I might as well share my feelings here.

I’ve been a K-pop fan for 10 years and a lot has happened to me in the past decade. This isn’t unique. Everyone experiences ups and downs in life. I didn’t come here to talk about the hardships in life, but to sincerely thank SHINee for getting me through them.

The warmth and comfort I receive from listening to SHINee is unmatched and I am forever grateful. It seems silly to say about people you’ve never even met, but these 5 shining stars never fail to brighten my day.

Happy 15th Anniversary SHINee. Thank you for continuing to do what you do. 🩵🩵🩵

[atlantis-area]

SHINee - Everybody (2013) 11th anniversary

[herewegobebe]

·͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺Happy Birthday Beautiful Boy⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧ ♥ℒᵒᵛᵉᵧₒᵤ♥

[shineemoon]

0408 ✨ Happy Birthday to our precious Jjong 💖

[mushpotaeto]

Happy Birthday our beloved Jonghyun 🌿🪷

[ultrakdramamama]

241218 shinee 샤이니(SHINee) Official

“늘 당신을 사랑합니다”

[eng tran] “I will always love you”

[hotasfahrenheit]

[SHINee - View] May 18, 2015

[neliq]

Suho, 240526 SU:HOME (video from x here, song here)

[smtown-tourist]

Shawols everywhere feeling like toddlers in timeout as they sit and whine, “Can I have Jinki back yet?”

[possession1981-moving]

JONGHYUN Mcountdown Mini Fanmeeting / 161006

[all-of-the-good-ones-are-taken]

Jonghyun (종현) | Hallelujah (할렐루야) (2015)

[helloleed]

+7

[jongtaeshinee]

It's been 2303 days without you....

[herewegobebe]

JONGHYUN 🌙 Love You Always & Forever 💖💎💞