#i miss x1 and will miss them for the rest of my life ;-;

[jnwonwoos]

havana - seungyoun x hyeongjun

[da3dm]

IDK if this is a “good ask” per-say but, what about tell me about a character you don’t mention/talk about as often on here? Like their personality and maybe a lil bit of backstory? 👀

Excellent ask actually—

How about X1?

I don't talk about him but he's this ghoul that lost his memories (not yet tho), but he's half human and doesn't know it. He's spent most of his life locked up in a secure facility in the sky, not even remembering his childhood with his parents.

Ghouls are listed as threats to the world and they either kill or capture them. But he was so unusual that they kept him. His hair and eyes are white. The only way you know he had irises is because of the silvery outline on them and the dark pupil in the center.

This is basically a 'ghoul' based off 'tokyo ghoul', but to be honest I went very far away from it. I only wanted to use the eye change and the diet while the rest was me improvising.

Point is tho, he eventually got out when they came to put better chains and restraints on him bc he was becoming the strongest they've ever seen, and he got out. He killed everyone in his way and I think he was twelve?

When he jumped he took a hostage but left them unharmed and to be saved by letting go middair for the dragon guard to catch her. Problem is that the dragon tried to catch him too and missed, but launched him into a river.

He washed up at the camp of a human woman without his memories and she started taking care of him. This carries on further than just that, but that's the backstory for him.

He's actually quite kind, he just has what's essentially like a permanent blank face that doesn't change until way later. He doesn't like eating people and uses animals as substitutes.

Also, the name X1 came from his code name and was the only thing he could remember.

—

People, ask me more about my characters and stories!!!!!!!

[x1-imaginesreturns]

Cute Kisses with X1

Masterlist

Warnings: Cute shit None

Notes: I tried my best, I apologize if these suck and I’m sorry that some of them are so freaking long, it just kind of happened that way lol

Requested: Yes

Han Seungwoo

The “Goodnight Kiss”

This is the kiss that Seungwoo gives you when he’s too tired to really express how he feels, the kiss that he gives you to fuel your sweet dreams

You and Seungwoo lay down on your bed, sighing at the feel of the soft mattress beneath you. It had been a wearisome day, and both of you were exhausted. Seungwoo huffed as he slid underneath the blankets and you knew he truly was tired. As you also got underneath the blankets, you slid over to where Seungwoo lay, facing him. Seungwoo simply smiles at you fondly and leans down, pressing a swift kiss to your lips. “I love you too Seungwoo,” you say softly, understanding the message of his actions. His smile widens for a split second before he ultimately pulls you into his embrace, finally allowing you drift into a sweet, sound slumber.

Cho Seungyoun

The “Kiss Attack”

This is the kiss that Seungyoun gives you when he can’t hold back his love for you

It was finally Seungyoun’s birthday, and you had quietly woken up early to make him breakfast. You wouldn’t call it a spectacular breakfast of any kind, but you knew that Seungyoun would appreciate the gesture and wouldn’t say no to free food, especially on his birthday. As you were putting everything you made on the plate, you heard lazy footsteps coming from the direction of your bedroom. Seungyoun lazily stumbled out of the room, his eyes clearly showing exhaustion, but his smile and facial expression looked pleasant. As soon as he saw you holding a plate of breakfast food, he came running over, the tiredness underneath his eyes vanishing at the sight of you. “Happy Birthday Seungyoun!,” you say cheerfully as he stops in front of you, “I made this for you.” You extend the plate towards him, and Seungyoun takes it, simply placing it onto the counter next to him. “You really made that for me y/n?,” he asks, and you nod happily. Seungyoun tried to hold back a smile, but it only leads to his face changing into a cute shade of pink. He suddenly places his hands on your cheeks and squeezes them together before smothering your face with kisses. Of course, you start giggling and try to squirm away, but Seungyoun switches to holding you by your waist, and you don’t escape until Seungyoun pulls away and says, “I love you so much y/n.”

Kim Wooseok

The “Secretive Kiss”

This is the kiss that Wooseok gives you when he wants to tell you that he loves you, but isn’t quite ready to share that with the world yet

Wooseok had asked you out over three months ago... yet despite how outgoing and social he was with his friends, he seemed to always be shy around you. You had barely started holding hands a month ago, which certainly says everything you need to know about the rest of the physical aspect of your relationship. And so here you were, sitting at your best friend’s Christmas party, venting your frustrations to your friends as Wooseok sat across the room, chatting away with his friends. “Maybe you should just talk to him about it y/n,” one of your friends suggests, “You guys are a couple, you have to work out problems together.” You nod solemnly, your mouth secretly curving into a frown. The rest of the party passed by quickly after that, and you pretty much completely forgot about the conversation you had with your friends earlier. Until Wooseok was walking you out the door before you were going to walk home. Right after you had hugged him and turned around in the direction of your house, Wooseok says, “Y/n wait.” You turn around quickly and say, “Yes?” Wooseok steps forward, grabbing your wrist gently, before leaning down without warning you. He presses a tender kiss to your lips and somehow the neighborhood lights turned off at just that moment, leaving you in the dark. “S-Sorry,” Wooseok says hesitantly, “I overheard your conversation with your friends earlier and I felt like I had to make up for making you upset. I don’t want to offend you or upset you, y/n, that’s why I haven’t been taking much action.” He smiles awkwardly at you, a cute blush plastered on his face. “I’ll escort you home,” he continues, “Your parents are probably getting worried.”

Kim Yohan

The “Accidental Kiss”

This is the kiss Yohan didn’t mean give you, but didn’t know he needed

You and Yohan had just returned from a lovely date. He had taken you to a nice restaurant and you had even spent an hour stargazing. Yohan was currently driving you home, and the two of you were having an intense conversation about how harsh your boss was being lately. Soon enough though, Yohan was pulling up at your apartment building and walking you up the stairs towards your unit. As you walked down the hallway in which your unit was in, you couldn’t help but feel as if the date had gone by too fast. So as you said your goodbyes, and as you closed your door, you couldn’t help but feel a little bit disappointed. Even if the date was short, you couldn’t see Yohan much anymore because of your strict work schedule. You sighed, turning back to the door longingly. Your mind got the best of you, and you flung open the door, wanting to go after him. However, as soon as you stepped forward, you were met with another person’s lips. Your eyes closed before you saw who it was, and your eyes opened frantically at the feeling of your lips coming into contact with someone else’s. When your eyes finally opened, you were met with Yohan’s confused eyes also. But when both of you realized it was each other, his arms quickly wrapped around your waist and you truly melted into the kiss. As you finally pulled away, Yohan says, “I really wish I could free you from your boss... I just want to be with you for as long as I can.”

Lee Hangyul

The “Sweet Kiss”

This is the kiss Hangyul gives you when he wants to express his thanks and love for you with a simple action

After Hangyul had debuted with X1, you hardly had any personal time together. No face time calls, no dates, no nothing. But that didn’t prevent you from being your boyfriend’s number one fan! You went to every showcase, every fan meet that you could and sent him supportive texts every night about how well he was doing and of course, you stated how much you love him. One night, however, as you were about to send him another encouraging message, he sent a text first saying, ‘I’ll be over in a few.’ Your face warmed at the thought of seeing him again, and you couldn’t help but wait by your front entrance. After about ten minutes, a solid knock came from your door, ringing slightly throughout the front room. Naturally, since you were sitting right by the front door, you flung open the door, revealing a surprised Hangyul. He laughs slightly before saying, “I wasn’t expecting you to open the door so quickly y/n. I’m guessing you missed me?” he finishes with a smirk on his face, and you, overwhelmed by seeing him again, throw yourself into his arms, saying, “Of course I missed you dummy!” Your face buries itself in his chest, and you feel his chest rumble as he says, “I missed you too y/n,” he continues, leaning down so his forehead rests on the top of your head, “Hey look at me love,” he says softly, gently tilting your chin upwards. “Yes?” you ask confusedly. “Oh nothing,” he says teasingly, “Just this.” He leans down before you can respond and presses a light, but intense kiss to your lips, allowing you to feel every emotion that he finds himself unable to express openly. You pull away from him, relishing in the moment. “Y/n,” he starts, “I love you so much, don’t forget that. Now excuse me while I quickly run back to my group before the security guards realize that I’ve run away.”

Cha Junho

The “Hand Kiss”

This is the kiss Junho gives you when he feels nervous, but wants to show that he truly loves you

You couldn’t believe that only just a week ago, your longtime crush, Cha Junho, had asked you out. And now here you were, in the movie theater, your hand connected with Junho’s and your head neatly rested on his shoulder. When Junho had grabbed your hand, you swear your heart had never beat faster in your entire life. Even though one of your favorite movies, Aladdin, played on the movie screen, you were too focused on Junho’s hand around yours. You were so focused on it, that the movie kinda faded away, and you dozed off on Junho’s shoulder, your consciousness slipping away slightly. In your head, only a few minutes had passed since you slipped away, but suddenly Junho was swaying you awake, whispering in your ear that the movie had ended. You pulled your head off of his shoulder slowly, rubbing your eyes with your one free hand. As the two of you walked out of the theater, still hand in hand, you asked, “So how long was I out for?” You see Junho smile out of the corner of your eye before he answers, “About half of the movie.” Your eyes practically pop out of your socket, and you stop moving, now standing still outside in the cool autumn air. “Half of the movie?! Why didn’t you wake me up?” you ask, giggling a little bit at your own silliness. Junho blushes slightly, lifting your connected hands to his lips, before pressing a gentle and feather-like kiss to the bridge of your hand. “I-I didn’t want you to get upset y/n,” Junho says nervously, “I figured you were tired and needed some rest, so I was trying to be respectful. I hope you’re not mad...” You smile cherishfully before saying, “I could never be upset at you Junho.”

Son Dongpyo

The “Pouting Kiss”

This is the kiss that Dongpyo gives whenever you unconsciously pout, giving him another reason to tease you about your cuteness

As you tossed and turned on top of your bed, waiting for Dongpyo to come over, you knew he would be less than happy about the wrinkles in his sweatshirt and the few small food stains that had found their way onto his sweatshirt over the past week. You couldn’t help it though! His sweatshirt was just wayyy too comfy to not wear all of the time. After a few more minutes of tossing and turning, you finally heard a knock on your front door, followed by your phone dinging to let you know that Dongpyo had finally arrived. You quickly got up, sliding towards the door with your socks, almost falling and knocking over objects many times. You flung the door open, startling Dongpyo who was practically standing right in front of the door. “Woah y/n!” Dongpyo exclaims, “It’s just me silly.” You sigh while letting out a small laugh, and Dongpyo walks up to you, also beaming and gives you a very large, very, very Dongpyo like hug. He laughs and says, “Alright, let’s go watch some Totoro!” After the movie had finished, and Dongpyo was rushing out to make in time for his dance practice, you had pouted when Dongpyo had said he would be too busy to see you for the next 3 weeks or so. Naturally, you were confused when Dongpyo had just giggled and walked over to you, pressing a swift kiss to your still pouting lips. “You’re too cute to be angry y/n,” he says cutely, “Don’t think I’m going to forget about you, cause I could never do that to my precious baby!”

Kang Minhee

The “Neck Kiss”

This is the kiss that Minhee gives you when he just wants to hear you laugh and to see you smile

You and Minhee had decided to take a blast to the past and throw a picnic in the middle of your town park like the two of you did in the past when you were just neighbors. The two of you were currently laying face-up, looking at the clouds and trying to make shapes and figures out of them. “Look, that one looks like someone smiling!” you say, pointing to a cloud on your left. Minhee giggles at you and says, “Nah it looks more like a misshaped Santa Claus.” You both paused for a second before laughing for a few seconds. You calmed down first, allowing yourself a few seconds to breathe while Minhee was still hiccupping from laughing. “Awww come on y/n! I know you’re not done laughing!” Without any warning, Minhee reaches over to your stomach area and starts tickling you like crazy, causing you to shriek and start laughing again. Minhee started laughing at how cute you are before you sat up and lightly smacked him right on the shoulder. “Ya Kang Minhee! You can’t just do those kinds of things without a warning!” Minhee just continues giggling before he leans over again, pressing an intense and long kiss against your neck, tickling the skin underneath it. You roll over from laughter again, a beaming smile present on your glowing face. Minhee just smiles as he watches you roll around and glee, fulfilled knowing his job for making you happy today is complete.

Lee Eunsang

The “Ice Cream Kiss”

This is the kiss that Eunsang gives you when the two of you are enjoying each other’s presence more than the ice cream you’re eating

You and Eunsang’s walk around town had currently been on pause to stop and eat an ice cream come. Eunsang had gone with vanilla ice cream while you, of course, went for your f/f. As you walked to a nearby bench after paying for the dessert, you and Eunsang traded flavors, since he wanted to try your favorite flavor, and you never minded a bite of vanilla. The two of you sat down before exchanging your cones again. “You know y/n,” Eunsang starts, “That was actually pretty good, I get why you like it so much.” You smile back at him and say a quick thank you before taking another lick of your ice cream. Eunsang’s right, it is delicious. For a few minutes, the two of you sit in silence, just appreciating each other’s company with a delectable dessert. You were thinking about how lucky you were to have Eunsang in your life, and how different things would be in this moment if you didn’t have Eunsang by your side. Your face flushed right before Eunsang asked, “What are you thinking about y/n?” You jump slightly, your face heating up a little bit more before you answer, “I was thinking about how lucky I am to have you by my side,” you say nervously, turning your head so you can see him. He smiles at you fondly before saying, “I was thinking about the same! We must be connected or something,” he says cutely, inching closer to your face. You giggle nervously before saying, “Y-you really think so?” Eunsang nods, before he actually kisses your lips, and you taste the distinct flavor of vanilla coating them, even in the short second that the kiss lasted. Eunsang started giggling right after and you ask, “What’s so funny?” He just smiles at you crookedly before saying, “Your lips tasted like f/f!”

Song Hyeongjun

The “I Love You Kiss”

This is the kiss Hyeongjun gives you when he wants to exress his love through actions and words

You and Hyeongjun had been together for about six months now, and you couldn’t be any happier with the cute bub that is Sir Song Hyeongjun. He was always super cute, respectful, caring, sweet, sexy, anything-you name it, Hyeongjun was always there for you anywhere and anytime you needed him. However, you only had one thing you were dying to say to him. I love you. You knew in your heart that you truly loved Hyeongjun, and you really wanted to tell him, but he had never even mentioned that subject, so you figured he didn’t feel that way towards you yet. The other day, you had ranted to your best friend about how much you wanted to say the three words to him, not realizing he had been nearby and had heard the entire conversation. So, naturally, you were surprised when you heard things being thrown at your window at 10:00 at night. You had flung open your window, only to see Hyeongjun standing on the ground below, cutely waving his hands at you and sending you one of his classic cute smiles. He pointed at the tree that climbed up next to your window and you immediately knew he was about to climb up. Before you could silently yell no or shake your head at him, he was already scurrying up the tree, before stepping out onto the slight outcropping below your window. “Hi y/n,” he whispered cheerfully, and as he saw your intense face, he says, “It’ll be quick, I promise.” He gets up onto his tippy toes, so that why he’s right in front of your face before he says, “I love you so, so much y/n!” Of course, Hyeongjun does everything abruptly, so a tender kiss was promptly placed on your lips after he said the three words you had been waiting forever to say. Your face heats up intensely, and you back out of the kiss before you actually wanted to say, “I wanted to say it first! But... I suppose... I love you too Song Hyeongjun!”

Nam Dohyon

The “Forehead Kiss”

This is the kiss that Dohyon gives you when he’s just a little too shy to express his love fully

You and your crush, Nam Dohyon, had been engaged in a long bet of “who would confess first” for pretty much as long as you could remember. Pretty much everyone in the school was in on the bet, and honestly, a lot of money was being put on the two of you. Now, going into the second year of high school, you seriously expected that once again, nothing was going to be confessed and the two of you would continue to deny the other actually liked them back, despite the little sparks of hope in your heart whenever the two of you had time alone, as whenever you two were with other people, someone would always say something along the lines of, “Would one of you just confess already?” So, of course, the pressure was always on the two of you to confess. But then, one day, your best friend was starting to finally have enough of this life-long bet, and she said, “If you don’t confess before today’s over, I’m going to tell Dohyon that you no longer like him.” And so, now you’re spending the rest of the day freaking out, because you don’t want Dohyon to feel like you don’t like him, if there even is a chance of him liking you back. Dohyon noticed the distressed look on your face as you were walking out of your last class, and he, of course, being concerned about you, stopped you and asked you what was wrong. You both felt all of the eyes that were upon you and Dohyon led you away from everyone before letting you talk. “Well, I know we haven’t really talked about it personally,” you start, “But I’m sure you’re aware of the whole bet thing between us.” Dohyon nods and you continue, “W-well... b/f/n threatened me to confess to you otherwise she was going to tell you that I didn’t like you.” A few seconds of cricket silence passed between the two of you before you said, “So basically I actually do like you!! And uh I have... for a long time.” Both of your faces go completely red and the slight eye contact that you had going was broken as the two of you focused on the ground. But suddenly, Dohyon stepped forward, lightly gripping the tips of your fingertips in his own. And as you looked up, he pressed a feathery kiss to the top of your forehead before he says, “I like you too y/n.”

[x1-drabbles]

“It Will Be Okay” [pt. 3]

⇾ 𝙥𝙖𝙞𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜: seungyoun/reader

⇾ 𝙥𝙧𝙤𝙢𝙥𝙩: you’re dating a member of the hyung line. the recent controversy has been difficult for them. you comfort them the best you can as they all deal in their own ways. (each pairing will be posted separately. hangyul/reader up next.)

⇾ 𝙬𝙖𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨: none.

⇾ 𝙖/𝙣: part 1 (seungwoo/reader HERE.) ; part 2 (wooseok/reader HERE.) thank you so much for all the love. ♡♡♡

A loud tapping sound wakes you suddenly from a deep sleep. You sit up in bed, squinting into the darkness, your heart racing with adrenaline. You stay perfectly still, listening, wondering if maybe it had just been a vivid part of the dream you were having, but then it comes again.

Tap. Tap. Tap.

Your head turns toward the direction of the sound, eyes moving to the window. Your stomach flips anxiously as your mind begins to assume the worst, immediately and unhelpfully conjuring images of serial killers and ghosts. The banging comes again, louder this time, and your terror mixes with curiosity. You slowly slip off the bed and creep over.

With a deep, shaky breath, you grip the edge of one curtain and pull it open, unsure of what to expect, your muscles tense with fear. As your eyes adjust to the darkness beyond the glass pane you see…

Seungyoun.

Seungyoun????

You yank the curtain fully open and unlatch the window before quickly pushing it up with a huff. He tilts his head and grins at your from behind the screen.

“Are you out of your freakin’ mind?” you whisper-yell, glancing over your shoulder at your alarm clock. The display reads 2:53am. Unbelievable.

“Probably,” he answers, matter of factly. He pouts at you behind the grate and you sigh, pushing your fingers into the latches that release the screen. You remove it and he instantly climbs in, rolling through the open window and colliding into you. You both tumble to the bedroom floor with a thud. You cringe at the loud rumble of sound that echoes through the silence, but his face is already buried in the crook of his arm, trying to muffle a burst of laughter.

“Hey, are you insane?! You’re going to wake my roommate!” you hiss, though you realize you can’t help yourself from starting to giggle as well. It’s all just so unexpected and ridiculous.

You both take a moment to collect yourselves, still sprawled out on your bedroom floor, your legs tangled together from the fall. Once you finally manage to quiet down, you sit up and smooth down the oversized t-shirt you’d worn as a pajama top, wishing you’d slept in something just a bit more flattering. Seungyoun doesn’t seem to care. He rolls over and twists around, moving so that he can rest his head on your lap.

“How did you even get here?” you ask, looking down at him, eyes wide in disbelief.

“I walked,” he answers evenly, as though it’s the most natural way he could’ve possibly traveled.

“It’s four miles!”

“I’m an idol!” he says, giving you a playful smirk. “I have strong legs and good stamina!”

You sigh because he’s not exactly wrong, but it’s also an extremely risky and unnecessary stunt. There’s almost a zero percent chance that he won’t get caught and reprimanded. But you also know that Seungyoun isn’t dumb. He knows the potential (and very probable) consequences. If he made the ridiculous trek here, in the middle of the night no less, it’s because he really needed to see you. 

You can’t pretend not to know why. It’s been difficult for him and his group mates since their debut. Recently, however, it seems that things are starting to come to a head and the investigation into MNet’s rigging scandal is gaining traction and attention. Seungyoun isn’t the type to bury his feelings and so you’ve already spoken at length on the phone and through video calls about the struggles X1 has been having with the backlash. You’re relieved to know he seems to be handling the negativity well, while keeping most of his focus on the positive, but you imagine it’s still an impossibly difficult situation and your heart hurts for him. You know all the things he’s endured just to get to this place. Seeing his happiness tarnished even slightly makes your blood run hot with frustration and anger.

You shake your head at him, but smile, running your fingers through his hair. Even if he’s breaking 25 different rules by being here, truthfully, you’re glad he is. You haven’t seen each other, physically and in person, since before he left for Thailand. You’ve missed him greatly and having him here in your bedroom given the current circumstances seems somewhat like a dream.

“So, how’s the crew holding up?” you ask, your voice soft and filled with genuine concern.

“Aish...” Seungyoun groans and rubs his hands over his face. “ Everyone’s just kind of dealing in their own way, I guess. Or, not dealing. They’re all on edge. Except Seungwoo-hyung who seems determined to keep everyone’s spirits up, even though we all know he’s hurting too.” Seungyoun pauses, resting his arm against his forehead and staring up at the ceiling. He sighs deeply.

“And you?”

He shrugs a little and blows a slow breath of air out from his lips.

“It’s annoying,” he admits. “But, honestly, I’m so busy and tired, it's hard to even find the time to really dwell on it. And when I’m on stage and the entire place is cheering for us and singing along to our songs and I look over and my bros are just putting all their passion and heart out there�� ahh, how can I be anything but happy and grateful, you know? It’s not like any of us thought this was going to be easy.”

He scrunches up his face into a grin and you can’t help but return it, though your throat feels constricted with emotion. You’re so proud of him and constantly taken aback by how brightly he shines. In this moment, you feel so incredibly lucky not only to know him, but to share him with the world. Seungyoun is a radiant force, not meant to be hidden or held down, and even though he’d never admit it, you’re sure that he’s the glue helping hold X1 together right now.

“Hey, hey! It’ll be okay,” he says suddenly, sitting up. You find your fingers going to your face and as you touch your cheeks, you’re surprised to feel they’re damp. You aren’t quite sure when you started crying, but the obvious tracks of tears are there. You quickly go to wipe away at them, but Seungyoun gets there first, gently running his thumbs across your skin.

“Ah, this is so dumb!” You sniffle and clear your throat. “I’m supposed to be the one comforting you.”

He laughs, shaking his head, and pulls you into a warm embrace. His arms feel strong and steady around your shoulders.

“No, I think I like this better,” he whispers, before pressing a kiss into your hair.

You understand. Seungyoun finds his strength in comforting others. He doesn’t use it as a way to deflect or bury his own emotions, but rather as a way to share them. He feels most secure when he’s feeling needed; when he’s helping. It gives him confidence and assurance. You admire that about him.

“Listen,” he says, pulling back to look you in the eyes. “Don’t worry, okay? Honestly. Not every day is easy. Not every day is good. But, I’m not here by accident. Everything happens for a reason, right? Whatever happens, I’ll face it. And, I’ll come out on top.” 

He smiles so wide and so genuinely that it almost makes you start crying again. But you swallow back your tears and nod, returning his grin with as much love and affection as you can possibly muster.

You spend a bit more time together, sitting on the bedroom floor laughing as he recounts all the most ridiculous stories from their practices and daily life at the dorms. It feels good to be like this - just two normal people doing something so simple and mundane. But eventually, his phone starts blowing up. His absence has been discovered. Hangyul’s voice is loud and angry echoing through the speaker as he arranges for a car to come and retrieve him before the managers discover he’s gone. You offer to let him out through the front door, but Seungyoun insists on climbing back through the window. As he sits straddling the sill, he leans over and kisses you.

“It’ll be okay,” he repeats before adding a peck against your forehead.

And then he’s gone, like a last ray of light slipping into darkness. You quietly replace the screen and close the window, already missing his presence. But as you slide back into bed, beneath the sheets, you feel at ease. It’s hard not to believe him when he’s filled with such conviction, and so you do. It will be okay.

[hwayoungscorpioshin]

Faceless | final

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Summary: Junho is hiding something and only you can uncover it.

Also known as Junho’s everyday life as a robot…or is he really?

“Good evening, gentlemen. This is your Captain, Lee Hangyul, speaking. Welcome onboard Flight X1 bound to YN.”

Few minutes ago, Junho has been dragged out of his dorm room and shoved into a black van parked outside the building where the others were already waiting inside.

Now, he’s seated between Hyeongjun and Seungwoo as Hangyul continues to recite his ridiculous pseudo-airplane captain announcement.

“Please turn off all personal electronic devices, including laptops and cell phones and fasten your seatbelt. Thank you for choosing Quantum Airlines. Enjoy your flight.”

Seungwoo slides the door closed and runs his hand across his face exhaustedly. “Just drive, Gyul.”

“What are you doing?” Junho asks when the van easily passes the South Gate, the guard of which probably has already been bribed by the other boys in advance.

Dongpyo, who’s seated at the very back with Minhee and Eunsang, makes an annoyed sound. “What does it look like we’re doing?”

“Kidnapping me?” Junho quips.

“No.” It‘s Wooseok, sitting behind their row, who answers. “We’re helping you.”

Junho feels trapped and cornered. So, he ponders, if his friends think they’re helping him with anything, they’re dead wrong, because it doesn’t feel like it at all.

The car jolts a little and Junho’s stomach makes an uncomfortable churn. “Where are we going, anyway?”

“Didn’t you listen to Hangyul earlier? We’re going to see YN at the airport,” Hyeongjun tells him.

Junho’s chest constricts at the mention of her name. She’s been sending him messages after that night at the bus stop but he hasn’t responded to any of them. That’s three days ago. This morning, just as he wakes up, she sends him another text, one that Junho is prepared to ignore again until he reads it.

She’s leaving.

He remembers himself thinking that he’s never going to see her again and that he’s fine with that. He needs to be fine with that, because if he can’t, he doesn’t know how much pain he can still handle.

“Hey, guys,” Eunsang yells from the far back, breaking Junho’s reverie.

When nobody answers, he continues, holding up his phone to his face. “Dohyon says they’re already at the airport but since his sister wants donuts, they’re going to buy some first before she goes into immigration.”

Seungyoun, who’s been silent all drive long, sits up in panic. “How long till we get there, Gyul?”

“I’m not sure but we’re really really near the airport now,” Hangyul replies.

And as if for emphasis, they hear the sound of a plane taking off. Underneath the noise, Hangyul’s phone rings. He tosses it over to Yohan who immediately answers without even looking at the caller ID.

Dohyon’s deep voice speaks in a whisper when the call connects. “Yo, Lee Hangyul, where ya at? My sister already has her donuts. You said you’d be here!”

Yohan brings the phone closer so Hangyul can speak over the phone. “We’ll be there in time! Just distract her a little. Like maybe cry or something.”

“Cry?” Dohyon whispers harshly. “You want me...to cry?”

Junho watches the cars outside. They’re almost at the drop off area now. But with the speed that they’re going, he’s not sure whether to believe they’ll be able to make it on time or not. He hears Dohyon on the phone tell Hangyul to hurry the fuck up or else they’ll miss her completely and Junho decides that he doesn’t believe they’ll make it. So, before Dohyon hangs up, he grabs the phone himself.

“Dohyon, where exactly are you?”

“Who the f—Lee Hangyul, is this the dumb boy who—“

Junho cuts him off instantly. “Please, just answer me. Where exactly are you?”

He hears Dohyon sigh on the other side and for a second Junho thinks he would not answer but then he suddenly gives him the instructions before ending the call with a ‘good luck’.

Junho doesn’t bother explaining. They probably have understood him anyway since Hangyul does a full stop and Seungwoo, who is sitting next to the door, quickly opens it.

“Thanks,” Junho breathes and then he leaps off the van.

His feet don’t land on the pavement as gracefully as he has imagined but he doesn’t care. Yohan yells at him to be careful and he sends him a thumbs up before immediately dashing away.

Dohyon’s mom gives the girl a tight hug before pulling away and brushing the hair from her face. She lovingly pats down the girl’s hair with a tight smile, like any moment now, she will suddenly burst to tears.

The girl doesn’t understand this woman’s affection towards her. After all, she’s not even her real mom. Still, she listens to what her father’s wife tells her and nods when she’s asked.

“I can’t believe you’re leaving us again. You haven’t even been here for a year, YN,” the woman says, almost teary-eyed.

She smiles at the lady and pats her on the shoulder. “Don’t worry, Auntie. I’ll be back before you know it.”

Dohyon moves closer to her when his mom finally lets go and he gives her a long hug, longer than she expects and for a while, she thinks he’s probably stalling her, which he most likely is, but she lets him, anyway. She doesn’t plan on waiting for too long, though, because the moment Dohyon lets her go, she grabs her bags and turns straight to the departure gates.

She sees the panic in Dohyon’s eyes when she walks away and she hesitates a little. Because she knows, even when she’s promised Dohyon’s mom that she will be back before she knows it, she will also take her time away healing and possibly forgetting all the pain that she’s leaving behind. This could be the last time she’ll see them in a long while.

“Noona,” Dohyon calls, but he says it so softly, like a plea.

The girl looks at her watch. She doesn’t need to be in the immigration for at least an hour and a half. She’s got time but somehow, she doesn’t want to stay. There’s a nervousness that surrounds her when Dohyon reaches for her hand and she gives in.

“Stay a little longer, please, noona,” her little-not-so-little brother says.

She smiles. Her brother has never been this affectionate towards her their entire lives. She knows what’s up. Yet, she stays a little bit more, if only to accede to his request.

—

Junho is dripping in sweat. He has already asked a couple of people to point him to the departure area and still, he cannot get the instructions right. Ha has been running for almost fifteen minutes now and he does not know how long he can last until he loses the strength and will to look for the girl.

The last person he has asked for directions is a security guard who has given very straightforward instructions how to get there. He takes a moment to catch his breath and read the overhead signs. Nothing says ‘Departure Area’ like the guard has told him. Feeling defeated, he almost cries as he slumps down the pavement.

It’s over.

He will never be able to see her again.

He will never be able to talk to her again.

He will never be able to hear her sing again.

He will never be able to tell her he loves her.

At the last thought, he almost breaks down. What they say is true after all, Junho realizes. People will never realize how important someone is until they are gone.

“Hey, are you okay?”

Junho sniffles and waves off the stranger who is kind enough to ask. “I’m fine. Thank you.”

“Are you sure, Junho? You don’t look fine to me.”

He whips around so fast, he almost blacks out. And there she stands, in thick black hoodie and jeans, giving him a small smile as he takes in her features. Besides the tiny smile on her lips, the rest of her expression is unreadable. Junho thinks he is hallucinating the girl and the world is playing tricks on him for all the terrible things he has put her through.

He probably deserves this, too, he surmises.

So, instead of actually speaking, he stares at his hallucination of her as he stands up. She looks too real to be actually there. Soft, wispy hair and red lipstick. Junho smirks a little since this hallucination of her is just as good as the real deal.

“Hey, are you sure you’re okay?”

And just like that, the spell is broken. Junho realizes the girl is actually in front of him. She’s not a hallucination after all.

"YN..."

“What are you doing here, Junho?”

He scrambles for something to say. His legs are so tired they’re almost giving in again, but he feels like he needs to get it all out. Otherwise, it will consume him or the both of them. He does not know which is worse, not being able to tell her he loves her, or being able to but get rejected. Right now, though, he no longer cares.

He wants her to know.

“Junho,” she starts, “I need to go in a few minutes.”

“I know, I know,” he says, wiping his hand over his face. “I just need you to hear this, YN. Please, just this one time.”

Her eyebrows shoot up a little but she does not say a thing. Junho does not waste time, too. His desperation has overcome him and he is afraid if he does not say it now, he is not going to be able to say it ever.

“That night when I went to your room to apologize about the song, you asked me why can’t I be just me. To be honest, I’m still unsure how to answer that even now. But, YN, if there’s anything that I’m sure of at this moment, that is every time that I was with you, I was real.”

Junho meets the girl’s eyes and goes over to her. In the background, an announcer calls for the passengers of a certain flight. Feeling the urgency, he reaches out for her hand and holds it in both of his own. Her placid expression wavers a little, but she still does not speak.

“I can atone for all the things I’ve put you through and it would still not be enough. I just wanted to tell you I’m so sorry...for everything.”

The girl takes a sharp breath and squeezes his hand back. “I already forgave you, Junho. Stop beating yourself up.”

He tears up a little at her words. He thinks he does not deserve this girl. For all he knows, she probably does not even feel the same thing for him anymore. At least, not after the past few weeks. A small part of Junho tells himself not to tell her anymore. After all, she is going away soon and she does not need to bring with her anything that will trouble her more.

Still, the bigger, more insistent part of him tells him that it is now or never. If he does not say it now, he will never get the chance to say it at all.

So, Junho resolves, as he steps closer to her, to finish what he has come to do and if all hell breaks lose after that, then so be it.

“YN, there’s something else I need to tell you,” he starts, “I’m sorry I took so long to realize this but I want to let you know that I love you.”

The girl breaks into a smile. Then, everything starts to happen all at once. His friends are suddenly yelling and running towards him in a festive mood. Dohyon, who is standing somewhere nearby, yells ‘finally’. And the people surrounding them erupts to an applause.

“We thought your dumbass would never be able to do it,” Eunsang tells him as he ruffles Junho’s hair.

Hangyul and Yohan crashes him into a hug before shaking him crazily and passing him off to the other guys. Wooseok gives him a pat on the back while Dongpyo, Hyeongjun and Minhee all congratulate him in various degrees of teasing. At the back, Seungwoo and Seungyoun are standing behind all the chaos and Junho tips his head to the both of them which Seungyoun returns with a small salute. Seungwoo meets his gaze and nods back.

Junho looks back at the girl. She’s smiling and laughing at them. He untangles himself from his friends and makes his way back to her.

“Sorry about that,” he tells her.

The girl wipes something under her eye and flashes his friends another smile. “It’s okay. I kinda knew they’d do that. They’re so funny.”

“Hey,” Junho calls her attention. “I hope you know I’m serious about you.”

She turns to him and gives him a knowing look. “I know. I just needed you to say it.”

Then, she pulls him to her and whispers in his ear, “I still like you, if you’re wondering, but you need to win me over again if you want to be together.”

Junho can only stare at the girl as she pulls away and winks at him. She smiles over his friends again and bids them her goodbye. When she turns to him last, she places a hand on his face.

“I’ve got to go. Don’t forget to call me,” she says and pinches his cheek before turning around and walking over to her family who has been waiting the entire time.

He is suddenly dumbstruck and the fact that she is acting so coyly now confuses him a lot more. Still, one thing he definitely knows right now is that the girl still feels the same way.

And it is only a matter of time before he wins her over.

A/N: I was so excited to post this. So, here it is 😊🎉 I hope you guys enjoyed Faceless as much as I did. See you all in the next series 💓

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[sweetdejun]

coterie: the poker chip (1/2)

gang!x1 x fem!reader

synopsis: you’re an ordinary girl, with an ordinary life. but what happens when you catch the gang that is famous for keeping their deeds under the table, in action?

coterie’s masterlist can be found here

pairing: cha junho and y/n

a/n: mentions of violence and cursing, so proceed with caution.

you held the poker chip out in front of everyone, making sure each of them could see it. before anyone says anything, you’re determined to figure out whose this is; there’s a guy who shows a defeated reaction, muttering something to the guy next to him. that guy’s face remains unchanged. you rule him out too, there’s no way this is his. there are a few of the guys who show relieved looks on their faces, and you rule them out too. who is it? seungwoo clears his throat, “it seems like you’ve picked junho, y/n. junho, go ahead and brief her. the rest of you, come with me, I’ve your assignments. junho, I’ll contact you later for yours.” and all but one of the boys follow seungwoo out of the room. the one you ruled out early on turned out to be the owner of the poker chip. he approached you, with the same blank look on his face and reached out his hand to introduce himself. you shook his hand with a confused look in your eyes. he seemed to notice, and he started, “you must be thinking why I didn’t react when you chose my object. come with me, I’ll explain it to you.” and he turned on his heel, before heading towards one of the many corners of the mansion. you followed him step after step, and he began to speak. his voice was low so in order to hear him clearer, you caught up to him, now walking side by side with junho. “first and foremost, I’m cha junho. I’m twenty years old, I have been a part of x1 for roughly three years now, but I’ve been in the business since I could walk.” you go down a hallway that gradually gets darker; are the lights dimming, or is there an overall absence of light from this area? it sure as shit can’t be that they can’t afford electricity. junho continues walking, and your pace starts to slow until finally, he comes to a stop. “what business, you’re probably thinking, right?” he says, and digs in his pocket, fishing out a key and sticks it in what you can assume is a keyhole (not that you could see much). “was it hand-reading, or were you a psychic?” you sarcastically answer him, and he stays silent before answering, “I’m not sure what you meant.” inhaling sharply, you tell him that it was a joke, and you explained that the joke was that he was saying all the things you were thinking aloud like he knew what was going on in your head. now that you had to explain yourself, the joke lost some of its humor which made you furrow your eyebrows. “ah, I understand now. please know that I don’t really get sarcasm, so if you use it with me, I’ll probably have no idea what you’re talking about. I’m very straightforward.” wow, this is the guy you were stuck with? a breathing machine? your luck is fantastic. “I should be a bit clear about what I do,” he started and opened a door, before getting to the side. “after you.” you step into the dark room before a light flicks on. this reveals a myriad of different weapons along a huge wall, and in front of it is a table that holds multiple weapons as well. “holy shit. what- what is all this?” you breathe out, your eyes wide with surprise. “this is the business.”

you turn back around, and leaning against the doorframe is junho, with a revolver spinning on his finger. once he notices your gaze, it comes to a halt perfectly, and he lifts the gun in front of his face, before finally flitting his gaze over to you. “I chose the poker chip because like the card game poker if you bluff enough, you can win. in other words, if you keep your face blank enough, you can win.” you carefully lean against the table, making sure none of the numbers of blades are near you before you shift your focus back on junho. “I don’t understand.” junho puts the revolver back on its place, then he starts, “my job in this team is to kill. I’ve killed many people, and almost every time, I’ve gone unnoticed. I’ll do the job and disappear. that’s how I’ll get away with it and the reason why I get away with it is because I keep a poker face. even if I miss one little thing, I’m off the hook because they say, ‘he doesn’t look like he did it.’” your gaze freezes in fear because you wouldn’t put two and two together; even if he didn’t tell you any of this, you would have never guessed he was a killer. “do you remember the death of that one big business guy a few months back? the one who owned that building in the city? well, he asked us to borrow some of our weapons, and he ended up trying to sell them to a third party who just so happened to contact us.” junho starts, and the image is blurry in your head but you remember it. it was huge and all over the news that they never found the killer, and then your eyebrows rise in realization. “was that you?” and he nods. you let out a noise of astonishment. that just means one thing: he is great at his job. so you tell him that. “wow, you’re really good at it, then. I wouldn’t have even dreamed that you, uh... do what you do, let alone being the face of the nation’s most memorable assassinations.” and you see the first instant of emotion on junho’s face when he gives you a weak smile at that. “thank you for the compliment. it seems very bad, but I promise, I only kill the bad guys. and that too, after I get the background check and face details from dongpyo and wooseok.” your attention goes to the weapons neatly lined up on the wall, and you’ve watched movies and tv, but you’ve never seen weapons like these before. retractable blades and god knows what, your eyes wandered in wonder and you breathed out, “wow, how do you get access to these weapons?” junho shrugged, moving to stand next to you and mumbles, “well, we have our...source, who’s in charge of making the weapons for us, and by ‘us’, I mean eunsang and me, since we deal more with the violent stuff. of course, you could easily read emotions across his face, which is why seungwoo hyung assigned this position to me.” and as your eyes scan the intricate details on said weapons, and the small x1 emblem twinkles under the lights on the ceiling.

“y/n, I have an important question for you,” and you turn towards junho and urge him to continue. “well, you’ve chosen me to work with. and now you’re also aware of what I do. what do you think you’ll be able to assist me with?” you completely forgot about it for a minute. you couldn’t possibly come up with what exactly you’d do if you worked for junho, besides... helping him with the killings. “I’m not entirely sure what there is for me to do, besides, uh, killing. but I don’t think I’m comfortable with that yet.” junho sighed understandingly, then started, “I won’t do that to you yet. hmm, let me think.” just then, junho received a notification from his phone, diverting his attention from you momentarily. “it’s from seungwoo hyung, he’s calling me to his office. you stay here, it shouldn’t take longer than ten minutes. feel free to look around, just don’t touch anything, as you may injure yourself. I will leave you to it, then.” and he stepped out, leaving you in this...chamber of weapons. what would you do, exactly? you’re sure there is more to this job than killing. the research, the disguise, but that stuff’s taken care of by wooseok and dongpyo, but maybe you could help them with that. or maybe you could be like a... secretary. no, that doesn’t fit with his job. “what the fuck am I gonna do here...” you mumble aloud, and you huff and sit on the ground, which seems to be the only safe space where you could trust yourself to sit. just then, junho opened the door and found you on the floor, your eyes focused on a corner, in thought. then it hits you; who is there to make sure things are going well, and junho goes unnoticed? junho makes sure of it to some extent, you’re sure, but what if you helped him out with that. “junho, I think I have an idea. what if I’m like your guide, or something? like I’ll tell you about your surroundings and I’ll help you run through things smoothly, overall. I don’t trust myself with a weapon yet, as you may have noticed.” and junho stands still, eyes blinking at a constant speed. the air in the room remains quiet and awkward, before he breaths out, “that sounds like a good idea. I guess it makes things a bit easier for me, too. I’ll be able to focus on the job at hand instead of having to worry about what’s going on around me.” you stand up, and your eyebrows go up and junho blinks back at you robotically. “so, does that sound good?” junho nods and says, “we start prepping for our next mission tomorrow, so please be awake by 7 in the morning. I will see you soon, y/n.” and you leave the weapon room and head to yours, excited for what awaits you the next morning.

a/n: ahhhhh there we have it! sorry it took so long, everyone! a LOT has happened over the past few weeks; I was out of town, then x1 disbanded, then I had some personal problems going on and then classes started back up so there was really no way for me to send this out sooner, so thanks for being patient with me! nevertheless, I hope everyone enjoys it, and it’s good to be back on the writing scene!

[strawbwrry]

six ❥ under the rose

five

word count : 5.1k

warnings : a murder, a backstory, a brokenheart, and the feeling of missing someone

hello! consider this a lil treat to start the new year! this chapter is the longest of the ones ive released, and i’d like to thank all my readers for sticking with me and my series! you’re all amazing and i’d like to say, let’s hope for an amazing 2020! x1 world domination! (and iz*one i love my girls too) hehe! enjoy my loves! 💚

song rec : the unknown guest ❥ dean

❥❥❥❥

chapter six

❥❥❥❥

Sitting with them in the house was frightening. The more I looked at each of them, trying desperately to figure what they wanted to say, the more I got scared. I tried making eye contact with them, wanting nothing more than to try and see how they felt, but I couldn’t. Yunseo was straight faced. I hadn’t seen her that serious, ever. It was till her and Dongpyo looked at me simultaneously that I knew, something was up.

“Where do I start?”

I kept my eyes straight on her figure, watching as her eyes guiltily moved between looking at me and Dongpyo. As she moved to open her mouth Dongpyo spoke first, “It’s weird isn’t it?” I looked at him in confusion as he spoke, an almost reminiscent smile placing itself on his lips as he turned to look at me slowly. His eyes seemed affectionate as he stared back at me, I watched interested as he relaxed when his eyes met my gaze, “Isn’t it weird how oddly similar 1969 feels to now? Many of the same people, the same problems, the same mystery.” I was confused, and it clearly showed, Yunseo glared at Dongpyo. He acknowledged it, only to turn back to me and laugh at her expression, “I was born in 1952. I knew Eunsang, Minhee, Hyeongjun, both your grandparents, even your great grandparents. I died in 1999. Then I was born again in 2002.” He paused before glaring back at Yunseo, “So did Yunseo. We were killed, we knew too much about her and her plans, so she killed us. We weren’t supposed to remember. But we do, we remember everything.” Yunseo looked at him then back at me and nodded. She wanted to say something, but she was holding it back. Her eyes shifted, and she anxiously played with her hands,“Yunseo just say it.”

She seemed taken aback by my sudden comment, she let out a slight giggle and nodded. In stark contrast to her laugh, I was scared. Her whole demeanor seemed fake, a large shift from how she normally presented herself. “She hated me. She absolutely hated me. I was the reason her marriage failed. I was the reason she went crazy. I’m the reason this is happening. I’m so sorry.”

“Who are you talking about Yunseo?”

“Myungja.” She shouted, her eyes filling with tears. She brought her knees up to her chest, then rested her chin against her knees as she gazed almost soullessly at us. Her arms gripped tightly at her legs as she let tears fall, “Y/N it’s been killing me to tell you this, she’s out to kill you. She killed me, she’s killing everyone in your family Y/N.”

“You’re next. I don’t want you to die Y/N. I don’t want you to join the rest of them Y/N. Do you want me to be honest? I’m fucking scared I’ll lose you too. I lost everyone else I’ve cared about.” She stopped talking, her silence was haunting. She had slowly become a shell of the person she used to be. “Y/N do you remember how I used to hate you?”

“Mhm.”

“Do you know why?”

❥❥❥❥

There she was, holding onto her dad’s hand staring right back at me. A wide smile bloomed onto her face as her sister took her hand and they walked down the sidewalk adorned in matching Halloween costumes. They happily walked ahead of me, Y/N sent me a smile then looked away. As her eyes parted from mine I couldn’t help but feel frustrated. I could feel her looking right through me, it was a feeling I couldn’t identify. She read me easily. She offered a trade in candies when I was displeased with mine, gave me a jacket when I forgot mine, and gave my a hug when she knew I needed it. She always knew.

In contrast to that, I never knew. Her eyes always seemed cloudy when I looked at them. She rarely ever expressed any sort of emotion, till she couldn’t hold it back. Tears came almost abruptly, smiles seemed random, and fears were hidden behind a brick wall no one could pass. Nobody ever knew.

As years passed by in the blink of an eye, I couldn’t help but find myself with her always. She was the only person who knew what to do with me, who knew what to say and do. I felt guilty. As school years ended, and new ones began, we found ourself someone else to join our little adventures. Son Dongpyo, he was a short boy, who had a magnetic smile and a boisterous personality. As we got older I watched as his eyes got more affectionate when looking at her, and watched as she grew distant from us.

Maybe it was selfish of me to think this, but I couldn’t help it, I wish they hadn’t met. Kang Minhee. He was the only one who knew, who knew what to do, what to say, and what hid behind that wall. Was I jealous? I’d never admit it out loud but I was. It was instantaneous! She was my best friend, and she might as well have been my sister, and in the blink of an eye I watched the brick wall she hid behind break. Much to my displeasure, it broke for him. All I wanted was to be there for her as much as she was for me, deep down I knew it’d never happen. I just knew.

I knew he loved her, that I’m sure of. He’d do anything for her. It was wrong of me to hate him. He was perfect for her, an absolute catch, but I found myself hating all the things that weren’t wrong. I didn’t hate her anymore, if anything much the opposite. She could always read me. She always knew what was wrong. I hated her for it. Sure maybe it’s an odd reason to hate somebody, but it was mine.

❥❥❥❥

“Yunseo where is this coming from?”

“Do you remember when I made you promise me something?” I nodded, just audibly humming in response, “I knew you wouldn’t lie but I did.”

❥❥❥❥

“Yunseo?”

“Mhm?”

“Are you and Dongpyo dating?”

She sat up, adjusting her self before fiddling with her fingers, “Not exactly.”

I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion, my eyes gazed at her figure. What in the world did ‘not exactly’ mean? She let out a heavy sigh and rubbed her face with her hands, pulling the the skin, then letting it rest naturally.

“Y/N, I feel like I don’t even know you anymore.”

She lifted her head up and I came face to face with her, I stared into her eyes and felt a certain sense of emptiness, she looked tired, but seemed uncertain. Her body language screamed anxious, but her eyes told me something else.

The disappearing gleam in her eyes, and her tired disposition left me wondering, what in the world is she going through?

“Yunseo there’s no way for me to even tell you what’s happening. I don’t understand it myself, but tell me Yunseo, what’s going on with you?”

“Y/N, I’ve just felt so alone. You’ve been so stressed trying to figure out what’s going on with Minhee, and Dongpyo has been visiting new places and having the time of his life, I’m not sure what to do with myself.”

She let out a heavy sigh, “Promise me something?”

“Depends on what it is Yun.”

“Promise me that you’ll tell me honestly, who you love? I know it may seem like a stupid thing but it’s really important to me.”

“I promise.” She paused, her pouted lips turning up into a daunting smile. Her cheeks flushed red, her hand reached out to mine and pulled me into a hug, and she stayed there for a moment, “You’re not even going to ask why?” I smiled softly at the girl, I pinched her cheeks, “I know you’ll tell mer sooner or later, plus I trust you. You already know who, so does it matter?”

“It does Y/N, it really does.”

❥❥❥❥

“I know you love Minhee. But when I told you I loved Dongpyo I lied. I really lied to you.” Her tear stained face stared back at mine, “Y/N I loved him back in 1999. I got curious, and I got us both killed. He’s like a brother to me Y/N, we faked it for you. I faked it for him.”

“Yunseo I already knew you lied.” She gave me a slight smile, I looked at Dongpyo to see the sense of panic written across his features, “Yunseo don’t say it.”

“Y/N he loves you.” My heart started beating out of my chest, my head felt dizzy at the sudden feeling of both their gazes on me, “I wasn’t sure if you loved him too, cause at times it sure felt like it.” I tried my hardest to swallow the closing feeling at the back of my throat as I looked back at his face, his face read betrayal. A shy dusting of red across his cheeks as he refused to look at me, “Y/N I never told you because I knew you didn’t feel the same and I never wanted anything to change. Now while I may know a secret Yunseo’s keeping from you I won’t tell you it to respect her wishes.” His hand reached out to hold mine, it felt clammy and cold, he smiled softly, “I’m okay with being one of your best friends, I really don’t care. I just don’t want anything to change.” I squeezed his hand softly and sent him a reassuring smile,

“I promise nothing will change Pyo.” He smiled softly at me squeezing my hand back before pulling it away to wipe it anxiously against the fabric of his jeans. “Yunseo what does this have to do with Myungja?” Her straight face stared right back at mine, “She doesn’t like it. She doesn’t like that everybody loves you, and that everybody hated her. She doesn’t like the he found out.”

“Who’s he?”

“Eunsang.”

I stood frustrated, I turned from them both and walked out from the house and sat on the steps leading up to the door. I stared out at the sights of the forest that rested before my vision. Dead trees, red roses to my side, and as I turned my head back to look at the house I fell forward onto my knees, simply resting as I saw the well taken care of house. “Fuck.” I stood up and ran up to the door, as I looked through the slats of glass placed on the door I saw Yunseo and Dongpyo still talking, their eyes landed on mine and they ran up to the door and began to bang against it. I pulled frantically at the door knob, trying to twist the knob to no avail. As I let go of the doorknob I fell down against the steps and simply let my body go limp.

I had absolutely no idea what in the world was happening, whatever it was, I just wanted it to end. I felt frustrated, I felt tears brim at my eyes and felt laughs come from my throat out into the world. I sounded pathetic, at least to myself I did. I laughed quietly to myself till I saw feet approaching me, the woman plopped down besides me and brought my head to rest against her shoulder. “What’s so funny honeybee?” I turned my head up to look at Sujin, my grandma, sat next to me. The same gorgeous smile painted on her face as it always had been. “I don’t know what’s happening anymore. One second I’m in 2019, the next I’m in 1969, now I’m in god knows what year and I just can’t figure out what in the hell is happening to me and my friends.”

Her smile fell, and her hands rose to my cheeks gently pinching them, wiping my tears, and pulling my head to hers. She placed a delicate kiss to my forehead and stayed there, here lips brushed against my forehead as she spoke, “I guess it’s time for me to tell you.” She giggled a little as she pulled away and adjusted herself once again, she then moved my head to rest on her shoulder once again and cleared her throat, “It all starts with Myungja, or my mom. She had many soulmates, one being my dad. All though she seemed happy, she had a husband who loved her, Eunsang, Yunseo, and I, a great job, a great house, the dream life!” She paused moving her hand to stroke my head, “As you may know, we had a family picture taken, Eunsang fell in love with the girl who helped take the picture, and that’s when it happened, Dad told all three of us truth and we turned on her.”

“What happened?” He face fell softly, her hand moved down to hold mine comfortingly. I had never known her for very long, but in a moment it took me back to every memory I had with her, all in which she gently cared for me, comforting me when no one else could. It made ya both smile.

“Well honeybee, in 1962, my dad began to work a lot more to compensate for my mom getting laid off, and when she was left alone when Eunsang and I were at school, she was having an affair with her other soulmate. She got pregnant with her other soulmate and he ditched her and left my mom to carry the baby and pretend it’s Seungwoo’s. Well he obviously knew it wasn’t his, they barely spent time together and the time they spent, they never talked. But Seungwoo, is Seungwoo, he grew to hate my mom, but he loved Yunseo so much. He cared for her even though she wasn’t his, what fault did she have?” She paused letting out a long thoughtful sigh, “My mother on the other hand hated Yunseo with every fiber of her being. In her mind she was the reason her marriage had failed. She was the reason both of her soulmates hated her.”

“That’s so stupid!” She chuckled, “Very. My dad being the family man he was refused to even let on to Eunsang and I that something was wrong. For our sake he pretended that everything was fine, that they had conceived one day when we were at school. We bought it! Eunsang was what? 10? I was 13, we didn’t notice it. We were excited to be older siblings, Eunsang was happy that he wouldn’t be the baby anymore. And it went as normal, well until he told us this.”

“How did you guys react to that?”

“I to begin with had a sour relationship with my mom, so learning that certainly didn’t help. Eunsang and my mom had an amazing relationship, but when he found out that quickly went down the drain. Yunseo hated her to begin with, and after he told us, in all honesty she not only started hating her more, but began to hate herself. Dad tried to make sure she knew it was okay and that he loved her regardless, but we knew she never felt okay about it.”

“The summer of 1969!” She stopped talking and smiled softly, “The worst summer of my life.” I pouted softly at her and she gently laughed, “Oh dear...when he died he took a part of me along with him. His girlfriend was heartbroken. Dad was a wreck, Yunseo seemed so lonely and withdrawn, my mom’s mental state deteriorated further, things were never the same without him.” She turned around in her seat to face me, my head moved from her shoulder to stare straight at her, “What was he like?”

“He was the best little brother you could ask for! He was kind and caring, definitely protective of both Yunseo and I, but playful and fun. He’d always make you laugh, if you felt sad he’d be right by your side hearing you talk till you could smile again. He teased us all a lot, but always made sure we knew it was a joke. Even when he started to hate my mom, he could never not love Yunseo, she was his baby sister and no matter what he loved her so much. Y/N, how devastated were you when your sister ran away from home and never came back?” I bit back at my lip and sighed, “I’ve never been the same since. She never calls, she started a new life, and left me with whatever she didn’t take. What does one do, when the only person you could trust leaves, and never says a word?”

She smiled sadly, “It affected us all a lot, but my mom could never let it go. At every inconvenience or issue she’d pull out the, ‘grieving mother’ card. Yes I understood it must’ve hurt, but she went too far. It was after his death that my dad decided to file for divorce. He wanted to get better and try and live better for Eunsang. He had found himself a woman who I knew also had multiple soulmates, but she herself was an amazing person. In stark contrast to my mother, she was a delight. When I met her I knew she was the right person for my dad, my mom though...was enraged. One night she woke up at 2:39 am. I remember it vividly as I couldn’t sleep that night, she stomped down the halls and slammed open the door to our room.“

Her grip around my hands tightened, “She yelled at Yunseo to lay on my bed, so I scooted over and let her join me in the small twin framed bed. I remember I could feel Yunseo shake as she tried not to cry, my mother would yell at her when she cried, and she rummaged through the items in a trunk filled to the brim with toys, only to pull out a large knife. When she saw me staring she only gave me a dirty smile and said, ‘I’ll deal with you when I come back.’ I remember as soon as she left Yunseo began to sob uncontrollably. I took Yunseo out of the house and ran to Eunsang’s ex girlfriend’s house, and she let us stay even though we never said why.”

“What happened next?” I looked down from her face, letting my eyes stray to her delicate hands. I watched in shock as her young hands changed to more aged hands, when I looked up I saw the woman I vaguely remember meeting as a young child. Fine lines, wrinkles, spots of discoloration, and all, there she was. Grandma. I teared up almost instantly when I saw her wise eyes looking back at me, it felt like we were the only people alive, it was an odd feeling being there holding her hands, it brought back memories I didn’t even know I had. Tears welled up in her eyes and she let one fall, “She killed them. She killed my dad and his girlfriend. In the car ride back to our house, to I suppose kill Yunseo and I, a car hit her from the side and smashed her car into a tree. She died there. Alone, angry, and irrational.”

“I thought that’d be the end of her, but she refused to die. Shortly after a female ghost was seen haunting Cerisecreek, she’d always be on the sides of roads, by trees near roads, and she’d stand in the middle of desolate roads scaring people, making them swerve off the road. She died in winter of 1969, and haunted the streets until she got Yunseo. Yunseo found love with a wonderful boy, I think his name was Dongpyo? December of 1999, they were on the way to a holiday party I was hosting at my house, and on the way there they got into a really bad car crash. Dongpyo was killed instantly, Yunseo wasn’t. I rushed to the hospital with my husband, and as she was getting treated she knew she was going to die, and the last thing she told me was, ‘I always knew mom would kill me. One way or another she was going to kill me. I love you, but be careful Sujinnie. She said you’re next.’ I didn’t believe her, but she was right. She got me ten years later, 2009, you were so young my love, I’m shocked you remember me.”

“Myungja wants nothing but to end our family, more specifically all the women in the family, if you don’t know, all the women in this family have multiple soulmates just like her. The exception is, unlike Myungja, everybody’s soulmates love them. Like you for example. You have three soulmates. All of them adore you, she hates that.”

“I have a soulmate?” She chuckled, a wide smile adorned her face, “We all do love. Usually people only have one, but I’ve learned that some families have an odd assignment process and it runs in the family that they’ll all have multiple. It’s similar to how some people have a larger chance to have twins, but others don’t, it’s essentially the same. It’s in your genetics. Our soulmates also have a tendency to have multiple soulmates. You have three soulmates. Dongpyo, Minhee, and another one.”

“Who’s the other one?” She smiled ever so softly and shrugged, “They’ll tell you when they’re ready my love. But it’s unfortunately time for me to head back.” Her grip on my hands loosened and I felt my lips tremble softly. “Head back where?” The sad smile resting upon her lips was heartbreaking, her eyes were teary, but she sighed, “To where my soul rests my love. My soul rests on that cloud. Do you see the cloud just barely hiding the sun?” I nodded softly, feeling my eyes become teary as I continued to look, “Yunseo, Dongpyo, my dad, Eunsang, your dad, and your mom’s souls are there as well. We’re always watching over you my love.” She stood up, gently dusting off her dress and taking off her jacket to place it over my shoulders, “Please wear more layers honeybee, whenever we meet you’re always cold. Y/N, please be careful, and please please please, stay with Yunseo. If you do anything please do it with her.”

“Grandma won’t you be cold?” I said worriedly as I shifted beneath the sweater placed above my shoulders, “I won’t need it where I’m going. Y/N your mom loves you so much. Try going back through the door now my love, you shouldn’t have any problems. This may be bye for now, but not forever.” She walked down the small pathway in front of the house, as she got to the end of the path she faded, she was gone. I looked up to the cloud just barely covering the sun, I felt warm staring up at the cloud. I stood up, letting a tear fall down my face and only sighed, “Will I ever see you guys again? If I see you guys again, will it be up there?” The cloud shifted slight and I turned my back to it. I slowly walked up the stairs and put my hand on the doorknob, I twisted it slowly then pulled on it, the door opened and there Yunseo and Dongpyo were.

They sat on the floor, Yunseo simply stared at the floor, while Dongpyo fiddled with his fingers. Still holding onto the jacket covering my shoulders, I plopped down in between them, right back in the space I had been previously and simply sighed, “She told you?” I nodded my head at his question, he grabbed my hand in his comfortingly, Yunseo then grabbed my other one, they connected their hands as well and we sat there. It was silent, but on that moment of silence I let everything sink in, it was sure a lot, wasn’t it?

❥❥❥❥

Sitting at home didn’t feel the same anymore. Yunseo and her parents quietly watched TV, and I sat at the dining table lost in another world almost, as I simply stared at the the box filled to the brim with small items of my mother’s. Jewelry, love notes between her and my dad, pictures of my sister and I, and finally a full family picture. It was daunting staring at the box of objects, to my mom they were just little things she’d collected over the years, to me it was what I had left of them, more specifically her. I couldn’t help but open an envelope that simply laid at the bottom, oddly enough without any label. Everything else had labels, but this didn’t. I’m sure it must be something of significance to be in this box, but it it was significant to her, why did it have no label? I let my hands gently fold up the reflective thin dainty wire, then pulled the orange colored tab. As I opened the orange folder I saw a singular photo, surround by keys. I poured out the keys onto the table, surprised by the weight of the keys as they hit the table. Keys of all shapes and sizes layed across from me. The one catching my attention most being the smallest one.

It was maybe 3 centimeters, absolutely miniature. As I stared at the key something within me struck, had I seen this key before? It looked like the charm that hung on a necklace, except the corresponding necklaces having a charm being a lock. I rummaged through the box once again to find an abandoned chain, and the necklace with the small lock charm. I curiously stuck the small key inside the lock, twisted the key to the right, then before I knew it the picture inside the picture fluttered out of the envelope, lying face up I watched the scene that played on the piece of paper. It was odd watching a video on a piece of paper for sure, even odder was the fact that it was something that had happened recently. The keys splayed our across the counter began to glimmer, I ignored it looking back at the moving picture.

❥❥❥❥

"I have a secret to tell you, but you have to promise you'll keep it." He said, his voice ringing loudly in my head. My hands covered my face as a burning, almost throbbing pain came to my head, prompting tears to spill from my eyes.

"I promise I'll keep your secret!" I screamed out as the pain consumed me, my body dropping to the floor unable to to withstand the pain anymore.

"By the roses. There's something by the roses. In front of the-" His voice was cut off, and I was left crying, the pain suddenly gone, but the feeling of uncertainty killing me.

"What do I do?" I let my body fall softly back against the floor in frustration, I was back where this had all started. The voices. I decided to stand up once again, hell if I was going to let this voice get the better of me. I gathered up what was left of my strength, and my dignity and walked to the door. I placed my shoes on, and let my feet carry me to wherever they felt like I should go. My eyes searched carefully through the town looking for rose bushes, finding nothing. It was an incredibly small town, not much to look through. I walked in laps around the town for maybe 15 minutes. Just looking, not realizing that I had missed it. I felt defeated. I made my way back to my house, took my shoes off, ran up the stairs and collapsed against my bed. It was only 1 pm, and I had already given up. I turned to my phone for entertainment, I let my phone distract me for an hour, then decided maybe I should do something productive today. So I decided to clean my desk. As I let the time tick away, slowly cleaning my desk I came across the picture pushing me over the edge.

"Where are these damn roses!" I yelled in frustration before landing roughly onto the seat of my desk. My head fell into my hands before I quickly pulled them away. My jaw dropped and I quickly stood up letting my chair fall to the ground. I picked up my phone, shoving it into my back pocket, and ran to the front door. I shoved my feet into my shoes, pulling them up at the heels, before running out of the house, closing the door with a loud slam. I ran quickly through the sidewalks trying my hardest to dodge people, I arrived at my destination. The school.

I stood in front of the school, the cool wind blew by sending goosebumps up my arms. Ignoring that, I walked towards the planters instantly veering to the right. This planter was special, we planted the roses that grew here together. I began to examine the mess of stems occasionally pricking myself with a thorn. There was nothing there. There had to be something there. There had too. I had been all around town today, looking and searching by wherever there were roses. The flower shop, the park, by restaurants, outside the ice cream shop, but to no avail. A sudden rush of emotions came over me, I felt defeated. But before I could officially give up on looking a bright light shined, blinding me momentarily.

There laid a delicate silver necklace across the dirt, a small petal from a wilting red rose falling near it. The necklace was instantly familiar, it’s Minhee’s. I picked it up and my hands began to tremble, I stood there in total confusion, that had just shown up.

We now you know when this started and what led to this, now you find out what’ll happen next. I held onto the necklace tightly, and as I walked through the town back to the house I was currently staying at, I noticed one thing that one thing being the shape of the small necklace seemed to match the same of a small indent on the side of the box belonging to Lee Myungja. I walked slow, rethinking everything that had happened within the last couple of days.

As I arrived at at my house I walked towards the box with her name engraved in it. My hands gently touched the box, what could be in here? I gingerly laid the pendant of the necklace against the box, and watched as the small stone joined the box, it melded into one. I grabbed the most suspicious looking key amongst the bunch, and placed it in, then turned it. It clicked. I opened up the box and gasped.

I certainly wasn’t expecting that to be inside the box.

[opinionated810]

Blog & Life Update

Hi everyone!  Thank you so much for sticking around while I’ve been away!  I just wanted to come on and share some updates with you - so be prepared for a fairly lengthy post!  

I’m still living in South Korea and loving it!  But I’m super busy 5 (and sometimes 6) days a week chasing after a bunch of loud, tiny 4 and 5 year olds!  At the end of the day all I want is my pj’s, a yummy peach flavored beer, and my bed!  On weekends, I like to relax or explore Seoul and the rest of Korea.  However, I’m going to make more effort to post things on here - I’ve missed you all!  Here are some updates and things I have planned.

1.  I’ve been pretty happy here. My family is healing from my Grandma’s passing and are beginning to move on.  I’m healthy in Korea. I had bronchitis for a few weeks but am recovered. I got a COVID test done just to be safe and it came back negative.  So all’s good on that front!

2.  I wanted to briefly (or not so briefly) address the 97 line “scandal” about going to a club in Itaewon.  I’m saying this so you’ll hopefully understand the context of why I’m traveling and exploring in the midst of the pandemic.  I happened to be in Itaewon the same weekend the guys were - a week BEFORE the confirmed COVID case. A few things to keep in mind about Korea at that time (all of which still holds true today) - there were no regulations or restrictions about going shopping, going to cafes or restaurants, etc.  Everyone here wears masks - EVERYONE!  If you don’t, people will give you one and practically put it on for you.  There is hand santizer in every elevator, building entrance, shop, cafe - everywhere - and you are required to use it when you enter!  Your temperature is also taken at a lot of places before you’re allowed to enter.  We monitor our temperature daily at work.  Every bar and restaurant is required to get your name and contact info when you enter.  That way they can contact you if there is a confirmed case there or in the area.  Test results are back in 24 hours or less.  During that time you are required to self-quarantine.  So at the time, life was fairly normal here.  Friends met up, businesses were open, and things were more or less open.  So, in my opinion, what Jaehyun and the others did was not problematic.  However, I do understand if you have a different opinion of the situation - your opinion is still valid even though it may be different from mine!  I just wanted to share my thoughts and personal experiences dealing with the situation, especially given that I’ve been traveling and exploring.  Now - moving on to happier things!  

3.  The last weekend of June a friend and I were exploring a neighborhood in Seoul. We would turn randomly down streets and alleys based on what looked fun. After hours on our feet, we found the nearest cafe and settled in for a bit. After about 30 minutes at the cafe my friend (who is NOT into k-pop at all) turned to me and said, “isn’t that your k-pop boy?” (I’m trying to push my NCT agenda on her and it’s slowly working - she loves Johnny and Jaehyun) and pointed to a small podium near the register. Sure enough, there was a picture of Taeyong on it - as well as a bunch of Korean that I couldn’t read.  I looked around the cafe and noticed there were a lot of people with roses drinking a neon green drink.  As I watched, one woman unfurled a HUGE Taeyong poster.  That’s when it hit me - we had accidentally stumbled upon a Taeyong Birthday cup sleeve/cafe event! I was so shocked because we chose that cafe totally at random.  Even my friend was shook!  So of course I had to buy the “kit” for his birthday!  After leaving the cafe, we explored another neighborhood and we stumbled upon a HUGE billboard for Taeyong’s birthday!  It felt so surreal to see and experience these things in person!  But it was so much fun since he’s my ultimate bias!

4.  In the free time I do have, I’ve been busy exploring my neighborhood, Seoul, and the rest of Korea. I’ve been to beaches, temples, green tea fields, and have wandered aimlessly in Seoul.  Here are some highlights:

5. Since I’ve been living here I’ve discovered so many new (to me) k-pop groups and musicians!  I’ve fallen totally in love with Woodz (Cho Seungyoun). His album “Equal” is superb!!!  I had no idea who he was until I randomly clicked on his “Love Me Harder” MV - I had no idea he was on Produce X 101 or in X1!  If you haven’t already, you should check his stuff out!!!  I’ve also gotten really into The Boyz. I knew of them (and loved “No Air”) before Road to Kingdom, but am trying to get more into them.  No bias yet, but Hyunjae, Eric, Young Hoon, and Ju Yeon have caught my eye first!  Their performance of “Danger” on the show was so fucking amazing!  Do you remember how I said I didn’t really collect things?  Well ... I now collect k-pop albums. 🤣 I have at least 2 copies of all 127 and WayV albums.  I also have a full set of all SuperM Korean version albums.  I’m working on Dream next!  Once they’re organized I’ll share pics of all my photo and circle cards.

6.  I’ve felt so guilty for not being active on this blog, but it’s quite time consuming.  However, I’m hoping to get back into it.  Please be patient with me as I try to figure it all out and find a good balance with my “real” life.  Please feel free to send in any requests - maybe those will get me motivated to post more!  I do have some really old asks and requests in my inbox that I will hopefully get to soon.  I’m still planning on posting the Fluffy and NSFW A-Z’s for each member, but those do take a LOT of time.

Thanks again for sticking with me!  I really do appreciate and love each and every one of you so much!  I hope you’re doing well and are staying healthy!  ❤️❤️❤️

[hows-it-holed-up]

Perfunctory Photo Recap: The O.C. 2x14

Up until now I’ve only been doing these recaps for pilots, but getting stuck watching only pilots – which are usually the absolute worst episodes – of series I love sounds pretty grim. So as of now, any iconic episodes of any show are fair game. ERGO, despite the fact that The O.C. has what I’m fairly sure is a phenomenal pilot, I’m skipping ahead to the February sweeps episode of the show’s second season: “The Rainy Day Women.” If I remember correctly, it’s extremely emotionally satisfying and I will probably spend the last 15 minutes just pressing my hand to my own sternum and sighing. 

My Disclaimer: None of these posts will be in any way comprehensive, because I’m lazy. All of them are probably going to have spoilers of some sort for the entire series…or at least what I remember of it from when I last watched it an eon ago. Exactly what you want in a recap!

California, Here We Come: Kirsten and Sandy (aka Mom and Dad) have been fighting because the former love of his life needed some PRETTY INTENSE legal help, and he jumped at the chance. Kirsten understandably doesn’t love this! Meanwhile, Summer is about to jet off to Italy for her BF Zach’s sister’s wedding, because somehow we’re still pretending like this is a thing. Plus some other stuff is going on with some other characters blah blah who cares. Welcome to The O.C., bitch!

I read somewhere that Josh Schwartz always hated this title sequence – that he could never find something he was super satisfied with and just kind of acquiesced to this. Meanwhile the rest of us are screaming the words to “California” while we head bang and strum our air guitars, every episode.

In the first big scene, we catch up with Mom and Dad, who have been struggling for a few episodes because an old flame came back into his life asking for help, and he dove in head first. 

Kirsten is not pleased. This Rebecca situation was so heartbreaking. Sandy Cohen’s whole thing is that he always does what’s right. This was one of the only times in the series it felt like he had other viable options and he was obviously misstepping. I’m with Kiki here. 

Oh hello Olivia Wilde! I forgot you were in this show! She’s insanely beautiful, obviously, but those mid-aughts pencil-thin eyebrows didn’t do anyone any favors. Not that I would know anything about this personally, of course.   

And not doing the show itself any favors 15 years out: this “Marissa is a lesbian but it’s definitely just a phase” storyline. I remember thinking it was a little gratuitous and questionable even back in ‘05. 

Speaking of questionable plots: We’ve been strung along for half a season watching Seth trying to win Summer back and her rebuffing him. And Summer’s right – it WAS pretty annoying! Seth’s still at it, heading over to her place as she’s packing for Zach’s sister’s wedding in Italy, but...not really having anything to say! (i.e. still not there to advance the plot.) 

We get a brief interlude to watch Julie Cooper think about how she could snip the tip off her husband’s penis. 

And then we’re back to the real story. Although I’d honestly rather stick with Julie because:

SANDY. NO. THIS IS NOT APPROPRIATE! You cannot spend the night in a hotel room with your ex. You also cannot drink wine on the floor of said hotel room with said ex! Stop it! 

Seriously. You know what could happen. 

Anyway, Seth thinks he’s figured out how he might actually be able to move the needle with Summer. He’s bought his boat back and is going to take her...sailing in the pool? Sure! Foolproof!

I had a literature professor in college who would bring this show up in class every week, linking it to whatever we were reading at the time. He didn’t do this because he thought he was bridging some kind of gap between us and the material – only about 1/4 of the class even watched this show. He just did it because it made him happy. This “objective correlative” reference really made me think about him and chuckle.  

At the airport on her way to Italy, Summer sees a little boy playing with a horse on top of some comic books. I guess she’s like, “Even though I’m only supposed to be 17 my biological clock is already ticking,” and she ditches Zach and heads to Seth’s. 

Checking in with our other couple, Sandy has finally (sort of) come to his senses and headed home – after Rebecca straight up ran away from him because she was about to get caught by the cops. Helps when the universe just makes decisions for you, I guess!

Ehhhhh I mean it started a little! 

Anyway, they kiss, and it’s very sweet. And we’re all breathing a sigh of relief.  And we won’t sic Julie on him just yet.

Meanwhile, their son is on the roof attempting to adjust the satellite. He’s put on a Spiderman mask because it’s all he’s got to protect his head from the rain, somehow, and he’s decided the only safety precaution he needs is A ROPE TIED AROUND HIS MIDSECTION. Things, predictably, go awry. 

HOW did Seth not get literally sliced in half by this? He must have slid like 30-40 feet from the top of the roof to where he’s dangling. I have no interest in doing the calculations to verify this statement, but I’m pretty sure we’re at least looking at some internal bleeding here.  

Anyway, Summer arrives, finds Seth dangling in the back, and:

The emotional payoff for this arc, now that it’s FINALLY concluded, is excellent. And what a delightful way to anchor it for this character. 

It’s hard not to love this scene – it’s heartwarming. But with the benefit of 15 years and a rewatch, it also seems like this must have been VERY uncomfortable to film. Like apart from having to hang upside down for who knows how long, how was there not water dripping down Adam Brody’s (or more likely, this stunt person’s) nose the entire time?? Somebody call OSHA!

Musings from the Poolhouse:

- This show is disguised as a teen soap, but it’s so much more than that. Between its overarching commentary on privilege and the status quo and its own self-awareness (exemplified by winks at the audience like show-within-a-show-cum-commentary-on-itself-AND-reality-television, The Valley), The O.C. is one of the cleverest series ever to grace network television. Despite a few things not aging particularly well, it’s still a really fun experience to watch it. Except for season 3. Skip season 3. 

- Julie. Cooper. JUST. YES. YES YES YES.  

- Marissa’s face when Alex is talking to her about having to do things like take out garbage and pay rent made me LOL. 

- I may have been projecting a little bit about the kid with the horse at the airport. He was very cute. And I think my own ovaries have kicked into high gear.   

- There was an entire (C? D? E?) plot in this episode about Lindsay’s paternity and moving to Chicago and some other stuff I can’t bring myself to care about. Ben McKenzie and Shannon Lucio had like negative chemistry, so despite the show’s best efforts to make us invested in that relationship, it just wasn’t landing. I remember caring way more about her storyline with her mom, Caleb, Kirsten, even Seth. So, shrug, she’s moving to Chicago I guess! 

- Josh Schwartz is so good at music! Apart from Phantom Planet (obviously), I clocked Blind Melon, Louis XIV, Boyz II Men, Bell X1 and Matt Pond PA (covering Oasis) in this episode. A real auditory journey down memory lane. Did I miss any?

[courage-a-word-of-justice]

Iruma-kun 13 - 14 | Somali 1 | Magia Record 1 | BnHA 75 | Eizouken 1 | Idolish7 s2 1

New season...incoming!

Iruma-kun 13

How did Iruma even notice that collar? Geesh, that kid is perceptive…

This “spitting blood” joke is getting old already…

*Kiriwo starts his machine* - Why do I get the feeling something bad’s about to happen…?

Could you possibly call this “rank is the most important thing” a study of class consciousness, to throw some of Anime Feminist’s words? Or maybe this is a fantasy version of technology and it’s extolling the virtues of technology advancement?! *eyes sparkle*

Can Iruma join Kiriwo already? Please?!

Aw, dear darling! (<- I’m not sure if I’ve said that a lot in these notes, but I say that when I get the warm fuzzies and wanna protect a character…basically, platonic love, I guess…? Oh, “moe instinct” - that’s the words I’m looking for.) Iruma, go and live your best life, okay?

Thank you, story! Even though I knew it was being foreshadowed so heavily by being the focus of basically 24 minutes of this show’s runtime (= about 1 ep), I thank you from the bottom of my heart that Iruma went to the right Battler.

Wait, so Ameri is actually Iruma’s senpai by one year?! Hmm? I never realised that and I read some spoilers!

I like this new chibi animation style! Yay!

I never noticed this until now, but Kiriwo has one big horn and one little one.

I think the title, aside from the pronunciation of “Thirteen Dinner”, is meant to mean “The Thirteen Counts’ Gathering” (or some other high rank) or something of the sort. Update: So I checked and the character used, kanmuri/kan, is used to mean “crown” or someone who wears a crown, i.e. a peerless person, so it would be appropriate to translate that using the term for a high rank which is presumably going to be stated in the segment itself.

Turns out Babel…is just makaitou (the demon world tower). I don’t think it’s really Babylonian in any strict sense.

Depending on where you live, the 665th floor could count as the 666th or…well, the 665th. I know in Japanese, the word for the floor on the ground is ikkai (first floor)…I’m not going to tell you what I know it as though…that would reveal my location outside cyberspace, no?

According to the katakana, the guy’s name is Beruzebyuto (hence the translation as “Beelzebuth”). Beelzebub is the Lord of the Flies and a quick google tells me Beelzebul (close enough) was apparently an alternate spelling for him (or something like that…?). Patron demon of gluttony.

Astaroth, also a demon (king of rot, I think it was from Blue Exorcist)…interestingly, Beelzebub, Lucifer and Astaroth make up an unholy trio and all of them were referred to by a dude called...Solomon (which does kinda sound like “Sullivan”, if you think about it). There’s the connection between these guys…I like his top, too.

Asmodeus, patron demon of lust. We already knew that demon was represented through Azz-Azz, but now you see a spoiler I’ve been hiding for a while – Azz’s mother.

Amaimon…uh, I don’t remember what kind of demon he is in the demonic canon but I know him from Blue Exorcist.

Behemoth…?

Ooh, Ameri’s father is smokin’ hot! (Dangit, I do not want DILFs…) Azazel, a fallen angel and apparently personification of uncleanliness(…?)

Belial and (Lady) Leviathan, which we already knew existed from initial namedrops.

Who’s Baal? Even I have no idea…Update: Apparently he’s a Middle Eastern equivalent to Zeus, which explains his thunder allegiance.

Paimon kinda looks like Chaika, LOL.

LOL, “lifehack” is certainly the right word for it, Sullivan.

LOL, Belial is so short!

Although it’s kind of awkward to not see Lady Levi take a position of power for herself, it’s nice to see she has spirit!

Aw, this is cute. In much the same way I wanted Iruma to join the magical apparatus Battler, I want Sullivan to be Demon King.

Is Opera perhaps related to Ameri somehow…?

Somali 1

I was hoping to get to Plunderer, but got carried away writing another post and then lost the ability to watch both episode 1 and 2 ahead of schedule. So Somali is the new start of the season, but the last relic of the fact Plunderer was meant to start my season (outside ID: Invaded’s advance premiere) is the visual I have for this season. (Oh yeah, one of the reasons I’m supporting this – aside from it being a mid-ranker on my hype list – is that I heard a French animator, a friend of Thomas Romain, is getting his big start here.)  

“Dad.” – Oh, f***. I have myself an Usagi Drop. I knew I was going to get something of the sort going into this show, but…Usagi Drop’s experiences (or rather, watching the anime knowing the manga has that ending) have left their mark. Not to mention Somali (as this girl will come to be known) has Latina eyes, which annoys me even more since I dropped that on the basis of being scarred by Usagi Drop.

I’m wondering what Crunchyroll was thinking when they decided to coproduce this – sure, it’s probably quite cute and wholesome, but I’m far from the target audience. Did they think, “Is this what Western audiences will like?” Sure, it would hit a niche that likes this surrogate father/daughter stuff, but I don’t think it’s for me (and I’ve been thinking that all through the OP). I’ll give it a bit more to wow me, but it’s doing pretty terrible so far (because note all other anime of this particular reputation I’m more on the “neutral” side than the “like” one). Somali’s voice is probably the biggest factor – it sounds like an adult woman’s voice got pitch-shifted to attempt to be a child, rather than an actual child.

How can this golem talk about sight when he doesn’t even have eyes??? (Kinda like Juzo from NGL.)

Alright, that’s it. I can see when you’re trying to bait me with supposedly “cute” children, show. You’re gone.

Okay, since I have time and the reviews say otherwise, I’m trying again. I don’t expect to be sold to this though…

Was it just me or was there a reduced frame rate when Somali’s cape was the only thing in the frame…?

For some reason the subbers put “Why?” when the word was actually “What?”, which is a bit silly to be honest with you. (Nande?/Doushite? vs. Nani?...it’s kind of similar-sounding, but the sound is distinctly different.)

Still dropping this show. I just have another episode to add to my list now.

Magia Record 1

I heard there’s no Urobutcher this time around, but the first time I encountered the Urobutcher (in ConRevo) he made a particularly weird-feeling (in the context of the show) episode, so…uh…let’s say the Urobutcher is only as good as the material he writes, and leave it at that. Anyways, this topped my list – even before ID: Invaded came to hunt down that top position – so this better be good.

Um, am I just imagining it, or is that Sayaka and Hitomi discussing magical girls (or Madoka?) over the top of Iroha (I know that’s her name already from the synopses floating around the ‘net) and her fellow magical girls fighting?

Letterboxing? Now there’s something I thought I’d never see in Madoka Magica, ever.

One of the books was on organic recipes.

The teacher talks a tad too fast – I can understand what she’s saying, but it’s like she operates on x1.5 speed compared to the x1 speed of everything else…

“Nakama – because we can do it” – I wonder if that will mean something later…? In Madoka Magica, strange details always mean something.

“The only good witch is a dead one!” “Speech is silver, silence is golden.”– The tiny English isn’t particularly subtle, is it?

Uwasa = rumour.

Takarazaki, huh? I’ll make a note of that.

Who’s Ui?

According to the credits, I assume the blue spear girl is Nanami Yachiyo.

This is a respectable re-entry into a universe which I left not too long ago (in 2017). I’m definitely going to be able to stick with it for a season or however long it lasts.

BnHA 75

All this talk about a database…reminds me of the Quirk I designed for the wiki (also called “Database”). I conceived it in 2015, but I don’t remember who was meant to use it before I retrofitted it to fit the BnHA universe. Update: Welp, I found the document. The superpower Database (which was retrofitted to be a Quirk) is for one Itsuki Hatano.

“One blow to the top of the head!”

Iruma-kun 14

(Note: Some notes may be missing because I was busy multitasking while watching this episode.)

Go, Iruma! Live your best life!

Note “speak of the devil” isn’t how it’s said in Japanese. It sounds something like “whisper a rumour and it will come back to you” based on what I heard Kiriwo say (since I heard the word uwasa in there). Update: Apparently the phrase is uwasa wo sureba… (if you spead a rumour…) and then you cut the saying off to finish the rest of the sentence, just like you would in English.

You can’t even see a substantial part of Iruma’s hair when that demon on the phone (<-I know who it is, because I read spoilers, but I’ll keep quiet on that front!) yells for the first time.  

Makura (demon pillow) has that demon pun going on.

Ooh, Kiriwo-senpai is actully kinda sexy with his hair up like that…not that I know the first thing about sex appeal…

So is the ED about the Battler Party, in a sense?

Eizouken 1

I picked this show up because of the rave reviews it was getting.

Very Future Boy Conan, that.

…what? That OP was trippy. Then again, I didn’t mind ConRevo and that was trippy…this negative feeling is probably because I don’t know much about Masaki Yuasa’s quirks, I guess.

Why do people not translate “Eizouken”???? It means “video research club”.

The back is a good spot to sit in a theatre for anime. Why do I know this? I sit in the back of my anime club all the time, that’s why!

“Are those MiBs?” – I laughed pretty hard at that one sentence.

Why does this strawberry milk seem to be a parallel to the milk Asakusa promised Kanamori? (P.S. Asakusa is in Tokyo, IIRC.) Update: Mizusaki means “on top of water” if I understood the kanji right and Kanamori, with the right combo of characters, can mean “forest of gold”...which makes a lot of sense, considering how gold is equated with wealth and currency. Also, here’s proof Asakusa is in Tokyo...not to mention it’s the place from Sarazanmai! Meanwhile, I was thinking there was some sort of anime-related significance to the name, but I was thinking of Asagaya.  Update 2: Mizusaki actually means “water peninsula”. Sorry, wrong saki.

I know there’s a chase scene at the end of this ep, thanks to reading reviews. I want to be wowed by it, which is why I’m (metaphorically) holding my breath.

I like how Asakusa and Mizusaki are bouncing around ideas. That really brings the process to life.

Long skirts and wind but no sexualisation. That’s a good sign!

Whoa, that scene with the comets was AWESOME! I want more!

Idolish7 s2 1

Back with some good boys one season too early…let’s have some fun while these simulcasters can get this stuff fast!

Oh no! (<- self-censored) Nagi’s stupid accent is back! *yells incoherently for a second*

I like the little sound effects that happened whe Nagi’s finger moved around (to suggest “magic”).

I think the joke was something to do with the word gera (?). I don’t quite get it myself.

Misuta- Shimooka, LOL. I love how this s2 isn’t doing any hand-holding, though! I half-expect a flashback to appear and it never does.

Yamato, how are you so-*crying and Yatta! can be heard in the background*Okay, nevvvvvvvvvver mind…

I remember mistakenly saying that Nishiyama was part of Idolish7 (since I looked through some of my old notes lately). Nishiyama is part of ZOOL, so now…I’m not wrong anymore…(That’s not quite relevant to the random announcement of Re:Vale showing up, but it’s on my mind now.)

Hmm…Yamato’s thoughts on Re:Vale…I’ll keep an eye on him.

I think people like Tamaki because he treats them like he would his little sister…a true gentleman. Or maybe that’s all in my head? I haven’t been in the fandom properly, y’know.

This switch to occasional chibi antics…I’m not sure I like it…

Ohmyglob! Another boy to add to my growing list of husbandos! *points at Yuki* I knew he existed, but I haven’t had a proper chance to have a reaction to him ever since I started really “having a thing” for long-haired guys.

Re:Vale are like a comic act (manzai).

Momo has pink nail polish…I just noticed. Update: It’s probably more red than pink.

“Chan-momo” appears to be a variety of modern slang similar to Pig Latin. Apparently Gen from Dr Stone uses it as well.

Yuki has these cute little diamond earrings and Momo has studs. I’ve also never noticed this until now. (I, myself, can’t wear anything past clip-ons because I have a genetic quirk that makes it annoying to get my ears pierced, called beta thalassemia, so I can only fangirl about other people’s earrings.)

What’s the FSC again…?

Kyu-to aidoru!

I think Momo and Yuki are going to reach out to Mitsuki and Tamaki (respectively) most this season…just a feeling, based on their dispositions. Tamaki and Yuki have similar faces, on top of that, so thank goodness we can tell them apart by hairstyle.

Yuki wears this steel blue shade of nail polish…ooh, also cute.

*Riku goes stiff-faced* - *audibly facepalms at Riku’s reaction*

Momo has a black and green earring set on one ear…huh.

Ooh, very nice. It’s a keeper.

Update: Apparently, you pronounce their name “Re:ba-re”, which is a bit different to what I was expecting (essentially “Re: veil”).

[seungyovn]

Idk if this is a conversation you’re ready to have but... to me it seems like BTS was the reason of your unhappiness in the last blog. Or if you moved on etc. I understand because I’ve been in that feeling. I stanned a 2nd gen group for the longest time since they debuted back in 2009 but it wasn’t healthy for me anymore. To me I see you’re somewhat in a similar stage. Correct me if I’m wrong.

alright, i am finally back home at my apartment so i can get on my laptop and answer this question fully. because this has been something that has come up a lot since people from my old blogs have been finding me again on this space.

i am gonna put it under a read more because its probably going to be overly dramatic and long winded

bts came into my life at a time where i was in a very co-dependent relationship. it was the middle of 2016 and kpop opened up a whole new world to me. and when i fell head first into bts, they were my safe space. they were the first thing that was only mine in a very long time. and i just like went full steam ahead. i started writing. i started buying everything i could get my hands on. they filled a part of my life that i didn’t realize i was missing, my sense of identity.

but if you were following me back in late 2016/early 2017 then you’ll know i started to branch out and fall for more groups. and since i was also a fic writer, i wanted my writing to reflect my interests. and my interests weren’t just bts. 

and that’s when the first wave of hate hit me. people were upset about the possibility of my content shifting from just bts to other groups. they didnt like it. they didnt want to see it. they didnt support me. but then somehow that hate shifted and became personal. i was getting attacked for the personal stuff i was sharing. i was getting attacked for being vocal about things i didnt agree with. i was getting hate for being open about my really terrible break up. i was even getting attacked for sharing my step-brother’s death for “attention and sympathy”. 

and it wasn’t all armys who were treating me this way. i still had a shit ton of supportive readers and friends and followers. but things had just like been spiralling out of control for months that i decided to jump ship (to a produce group lol ironic right since my blog is now produce focused again). and i lost like 2k followers because of it. 

but i was happy. i was able to enjoy kpop again in a different fandom. but then after a while i felt the same pull to bts. i changed my url back and tried to get my blog back on track but nothing ever really felt the same. so i decided to delete. 

i remade in secret and started writing again in hopes that i would find that spark. but it was like going back to an ex you know you shouldnt go back to. when i revealed myself and re-posted content i just put myself right back where i was before. i wasn’t happy. i was losing interest in bts. i was just....stuck. which sounds so strange but when you are a content creator that is the only word that seems to fit. 

so i made the decision to close war-of-hormoan. i finally felt like my time on that space had ended. and that it was time for me to move on to bigger and better things. and in order to prevent myself from going back and repeating the same mistakes i made when i first remade, i posted the endings to all my fics. i gave conclusions and tied up loose strings so that i wouldn’t be tempted. 

and it was definitely the right decision. i am proud of the work i created in those almost 3 years. i read through my google docs and feel so much joy in the memories in that time of my life. and it will always be really special to me as it was through the friendships i made and the support of my followers that i made it through one of the hardest periods in my life.

and i decided to remake a few weeks after because i still wanted to enjoy gifs and content but without the pressure of being a “content creator”. i just wanted to be a fan. and to be able to relax. and cry in the tags over my biases.

 and i also decided to officially leave bts behind. 

it wasn’t because of anything that happened with the anons and the drama. it was because to be honest, i just haven’t been interested in them in a very long time. they just feel so overexposed and have turned into a machine that is constantly pumping out products that don’t really feel like them (not their music because i really loved the last mini but all the shit like dolls and uno cards and who knows what else). 

they’ve just lost that spark for me. 

and i felt oddly guilty about it? because people in kpop fandoms make you feel like you have to be SO INVESTED AND SO LIKE EMOTIONALLY CONNECTED to call yourself a fan....and that’s not always the case. like i couldnt give a shit about streaming numbers or fan theories. or any of that. i just want to enjoy my favorites without that intense pressure. and i feel like the bts fandom has become all about numbers. 

a part of me feels like they entered my life for a reason. they were my rock that got me through that horrible fucking breakup. they allowed me to make friendships that i know are probably going to last the rest of my life. and there are so many things i could say about what that time in my life meant to me. and will always mean to me, but i will keep that to myself because i will probably start to cry and sound even more dramatic than i already am rn.

but i still casually listen to them. i still check out run episodes if i think one is funny. but i definitely don’t feel the same way about them as i used to. and who knows, maybe after their hiatus (which they fucking deserve) and put out a new album i’ll get sucked back into them. but for now i am enjoying the break. 

i am enjoying giving attention to other groups. esp since x1 is about to debut and askldfjasdfalksdfj i am so whipped for them i can’t even deal with it sometimes. 

[lykaonimagines]

I’m Not Even Sure What To Say

The loss of a legend, innovator, and geneiunely good person. Marvel has been a large part of my life since I was a kid, playing with my dad’s action figures and becoming utterly obsessed with X1 come out. Grew up wanting to be a superhero instead of a princess like a lot of the little girls around me and I loved it.

That then turned into Marvel giving me the start to my career. The company he built so much of and put so much into, saw something in me to give me a chance to work for them and grow. I learned so much from my time there, and grew tremendously as a person and an artist.

Then the absolute joy and heartbreak the movies brought on their own, and the acceptance and friendship I’ve found through the fandom.

So I want to thank my hero for all he put into Marvel, that became a source of joy, sadness, companionship, and growth in my life like no other. He left behind a legacy. He’ll be missed like crazy, Rest In Peace Stan.

[sf9]

*lies in a puddle of tears* IS SO ACCURATE, LOVELY MISS and what fine men they are 😌 but their personalities are the best!!!! (Where can I find a boyfriend like them 😔); I personally really liked the F and 9ver. (I just really like such concepts, like darker, mysterious??); and this is random but imagine them with a rock concept *manifesting this* 👄👄👄😂

I haven't read anything by Holly Black and "Cinderella is dead" sounds really intriguing 👀👀👀 I've read letters to the lost (I think that was the title of the book) by Kemmerer and I really liked it back then. I'll definitely check all your recommendations when I have more time for reading!!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Ooo alternative/punk rock you say 👄👄👄 which were/are your favourite bands? I personally like them as well, also indie rock, hard rock, classical rock, just any type of rock, I guess 😂 and I'm a sucker for grunge💗. I have way too many fav.bands but some of them are Evanescence, Muse, Linkin ParkGreen Day, The Doors, Led Zeppelin, Bon Jovi, Guns n Roses, The Smiths, Joy Division, Nirvana, Alice in Chains, Foo Fighters, and maaany more. Also who are your favourite Korean artists? The Korean music scene is huge and there are soo many hidden gems, there's always something to be discovered!

I want to catch up with SF9 content but I don't know where to start from. Can you give me advice? And I want to officially complain, my friend, I hate summer, it's too hot here and I sweat a lot and I just want chilly weather and to wear hoodies and pullovers and scarves, and drink tea and hot chocolate 😭😭😭 BUT I almost finished the drama I'm watching *the spies who loved me* and will start watching another one (uni is almost over and I just want to hibernate, watching dramas 😔), and I'll cook myself pasta tonight! pasta is love, pasta is life 😌🥰🥰❤️❤️❤️ what about you? do you like watching dramas, what are your favourite ones? Aand hope you'll eat something delicious too!!! I also love chatting with you so much, hope you don't feel bored with me 🥺💗💗💗 have a nice rest of the day and also have a nice week!! stay hydrated and stay safe, my beloved 🥰🥰🥰💗💗💗💞💞💕💕💜💜💜💜💜😘😘😘🌹🌷(these flowers are for you 😘)- your fantasy friend

P.S: everyday and everytime, as I log into tumblr, I'm anxious to see anything from the kings because they totally wreck me and their talent and charms and energy and everything, aah 🥴

HELLO MY LOVELY FANTASY FRIEND!!!!

Where can we find an SF9 boyfriend please XD😭😭 ahhhh the darker sf9 concepts are really so stunning aND OH MY GOD???? SEPGU ROCK CONCEPT?????? WHERE CAN I SIGN UP FOR THIS ;o; I would absolutely LOVE to see this, they would be so perfect for a rock version 👀👀👀

Holly Black is a really good author, I like more of her recent stuff though! Cinderella is Dead was SO good, it had a lot of brutal stuff so trigger warning for that ;___; ooh I haven't read Letters to the Lost but I think I just might, it sounds good :") yay I hope you like them 🥺💖💖

I used to really like All Time Low and PATD ((I haven't listened to their stuff in years but it still goes so hard ;;)) and also Nirvana, Sleeping with Sirens and Pierce the Veil 🥺 AHHHHHHH OH MY GOD all your favourites!! SO iconic!!!!!!! You have such great taste I really am in awe ;o; as for Korean artists, my two ults are exo and sf9 🥺🥺but some of my other faves are Dreamcatcher, Oneus, Victon ((all the X1 members groups *cries)), Ateez, TBZ, iKON, Infinite, VIXX, Astro, Cherry Bullet, Red Velvet ,,,, a lot more tbh XD as for soloists, I LOVE all the exo soloists, as well as Woodz, Jeong Sewoon, Kim Jaehwan, IU, Chungha and ,,,, a lot more 😂 what about you?? I agree, the music scene is so big and there's always something new to blow your mind away :'D🎉🎉 ((ooh speaking of Rock, this just came on shuffle so if you have time, check it out :") it's Valkyrie rock version by Oneus!!))

Ahhhhh YES 🥺🥺 you can check out this ask for links on sf9 variety shows and content, this is a good list to start on :'D I hope you enjoy it!!!!!! I HATE SUMMER TOO 💀💀💀 it's winter here and I'm literally doing everything you mentioned XD I hope the heat stops soon and that the weather gets more bearable, summer's heat is literally the worst :((((( keep cool and hydrated!!!! I just googled the drama and it looks so good!!! I also just finished a drama ((Mine)) and it was AMAZING 😳 I'm cheering for you!!! Uni will be over soon and you can eat nice pasta and binge watch a lot of dramas!!!!! You got this Fantasy Friend 🥺🥺💖💖💖 *yells PASTA* I really like watching dramas, some of my favourites are Strong Woman Do Bong Soon, Goblin, Scarlet Heart, Sky Castle, Extraordinary You, While you were Sleeping, Her Private Life, Crash Landing on You, Hospital Playlist, okay I'm gonna stop here before this goes on 🤣🤣 what about you??

I ate delicious food today, I hope you did too!!!! I never feel bored with you, I always get so excited 🥺!!!! THE FLOWERS PLEASE YOU'RE SO SO SWEET 🥺🥺🥺I'm sending you lots of love and hearts and I hope you rest lots and that uni is kind!!! 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖

((also SAME every day I get so nervous to see what's next for us Fantasies, SF9 are really doing the most for us XD I can't wait for tomorrow's teaser ;o;))

[megamanxfanfics]

Did the Risk pay off?

Did you enjoy my little April Fool’s Joke? Did anyone even notice it??

Sorry about that. It’s not usually like me to joke like that, but the reason I did so was because its probably the last time I’d have the opportunity to ever pull an April Fool’s Prank about this project again.  That is to say, I am very confident that by next April Fool’s Day - 2022, I’ll be long done with Season VI.

It’s a little sad to say that, but mostly triumphant on my end. There was a little truth in that 4/1 post. I Did go on a Marvel bend and rewatch the entire MCU for funzies, and I was taking a long ass time on getting out Ep. 13, but believe me. I wasn’t over or burnt out from X at all.  I just needed a little time to figure out how to execute what I wanted to do properly.  I’m mostly satisfied with the turnout. =D

For those of you who haven’t read S. VI - Ep. 13 yet, I highly suggest you do so, because there will be Massive Spoilers ahead.  Since the tail end of Ep. 11, I set X up for a risky fanficky side-adventure.  And now that I’ve committed to it and it’s officially out there, the only question that’s left to ask is... Did the risk pay off??

First, I guess I should admit that my planning for the 2nd Arc was always hazy, even after finishing up Ep. 7, when X defeated the Nightmare Zero.

I knew in Ep. 8, we were going to have a lot of Zero getting reacquainted with the gang and that I was going to have to resolve the plot hole of X5′s Bad Ending, lining up with the way he acts in X6 - as a Zero fanboy.  So the returning Memory thing factored in big time.

Ep. 9 was Zero’s first mission out while X recovered.  My plan was to always have X get in that portal and face Dynamo.  But what would come after was a giant mystery to me.  

I didn’t want X to keep bumping into to Dynamo every time he got in a portal.  And I also didn’t want him to keep bumping into High Max either.  All of High Max’s dialogue and interactions thus far indicated that he wants X dead, and based off of the rules I set up for the Portal Dimensions, X couldn’t just leave in the middle of a fight.  That’s also not his style.

So in a way, I kind of wrote myself into a hole.  I’d either have to end High Max early, (which I didn’t want to do), or I’d have to get creative.

Then something clicked out of nowhere.  Something that could be very Nostalgic and Special, but would it work??  When X gets to the Fire Portal, he could face a Nightmare Vile from X1.  Then in the next portals, he could face Nightmare versions of his other bullies from the rest of the games. X2 - Violen & Agile, X3 - Bit & Byte, X4 - Double...  It could be great!  But what purpose would it serve other than Fan Service?

It’s a great question that I’m still asking, but ultimately - my alternative was to have X face High Max prematurely and lose [where it would be very hard to have High Max spare him.] Or to have X prematurely defeat High Max, which again I really didn’t want to do.  And Dynamo was way too injured to just keep taking beatings from X.  That’d get very boring and annoying very fast.

So I went for it.  It took 2 episodes to get there, but in Ep. 11 X took on Nightmare Vile...  And honestly, I thought it was great!  While he was doing that, Zero was facing Blaze Phoenix, which was equally exciting to me.

Honestly, in Ep. 12, I wanted to get right to it and call that one Nightmare Lane, but X & Zero needed to recover and I already had planned on them talking everything out, which I was putting off again and again.  That episode named itself once their conversation about X5′s encounter in Antarctica really got going.  I also really kinda loved that ending with X’s failure in the Inami Temple portal.

This set us up for Ep. 13, which I wanted to be an Action-Packed showstopper. So that was the plan all along for this episode, once I committed to the Nostalgic Nightmare idea.  My goal was for X to get to Double, and I made it there. It worked out.  But this is admittedly a very dense chapter.

Part of the point of these Nostalgic Nightmares is to show X’s growth after all this time.  He’s been whining and complaining this whole time about how the Nightmare is too tough, but guess what? He’s already so much stronger than he ever was to previous threats like Vile, the X-Hunters, the Nightmare Police & Double.  I felt like this could be a much-needed confidence booster for him, but also serve as a dual purpose for the bad guys to wear him down, psychologically.  Any excuse I can have to make the villains banter, I’ll also take.  I really like how this is all build up to Metal Shark, but will it pay off is the question?  Will I be able to stick that landing?  Time will tell.

I'm looking forward to writing Ep. 14. Honestly, I wanted to have a whole fight with Double and then some aftermath planned as the true closer to Ep. 13, but upon rereading, it was already dense enough.  [Frankly, it probably could’ve ended when Zero was about to set off to the North Pole Area, but that’s fine.]

Also, I really surprised myself with how good X’s meet up with Phantom was. [His Rescue Reploid name in the game was the ONLY reason for these MMZ Easter eggs.] But now I’m so happy that I’ve been including them, because I’m feeling a bigger picture coming about for when I end this Season.

Levy was just this flirty inclusion to spice up the Alia & X dialogue at first. Anything else with her would be a bonus. Fef became a very necessary device to keep Hal & Kassy safe, while they’ve been stranded in the Magma Area for so long.  Making him a junkie derelict was an interesting choice too. And of course, Phantom was in the Portal at the Central Museum revisit.  I always had this vague sense in my mind that X was going to have a very harrowing rescue mission that kept failing at every revisit, but then he’d bump into Phantom who was holding his own and he’d get this giant sense of hope. Boom. Grainy Effect. Episode ending right there on Phantom.

But of course, in execution that couldn’t happen with the rest that I had planned and that’s fine.  Still, I was surprised at their dialogue with each other. Phantom was really impressive and cool.  Just the premise of this exhausted warrior, whose resigned himself to protecting himself for days, only to bump into X and consider him a fool for getting stuck here with him.

But no. Now, Double has entered the Portal.  And X knows there’s a way out.

[I also never thought about the fact that Phantom would be stuck in the room with him during the fight, so now I’ve got some thinking to do.] lol

Harpy’s save will be next and I don’t mind spoiling that he’ll be in the Recycle Area.  [I did my best to keep to their elements, but the X6 stages didn’t really lend for that.]

Phantom was always gonna be in the Central Museum, because that is game-dictated. Levy could’ve been in the North Pole, I suppose, but the Inami Temple is ridden with females, so it made the most sense to me to make that her domain. Fef being in the Magma Area was spot on. I love that it was his old hangout spot - Dark Haven.  So teen-angsty/broody.

Harpy being in the Recycle Lab is kind of just a circumstance thing, but we’ll talk about it when we get there.

I wanted to go over the writing process to this one, but this is already getting quite lengthy.  I guess I can say that it was straight forward, writing through X’s battle against Violen & Agile. I always wanted Isoc to come in right after, to give us the hint that he’s Serges 2.0. But then, that revisit to the Amazon Area got draggy...  I did my best, but I had to make cuts.  I liked what I did once he got in the portal. His refight with Bit & Byte was pretty cool.  Bringing Marty into it was a fun choice. I did like, how X got his moment of catharsis after all.  [I know there’s a real lost-opportunity with not including iX, but honestly that’d be too much.  If I ever write iX again, I think it’s best if I save him for the Mega Missions series.]

This thing fell apart when I got to the Central Museum revisit. I didn’t want to write that at all... In my script, I had marks at the bottom of the doc for what he’d say in the other totems IF he revisited.  And here we weeeeere.   Yet again, I was in the same position as last year at this time, when I wrote out Ep. 3.  I handled it better, then!  Playing over and over again to find right parts of the stage I wanted to write was annoying.  I bet I missed out on Rescue Reploids too, or Zombie Reploids at this point, but it’s fine.  It’s been so long, they probably just died.  I could always edit that in post, that X passes a bunch of dead bodies.  That’d make for some spooky atmosphere.

At this point, I re-analyzed the entire chapter and decided it was high-time for Zero to wake up and go about his original directives.  Time to add to the layers. It brought parts to life, for sure.  It even cemented other transitions, which was really cool.  I liked that I gave Douglas something else to do other than just, be there...

Once I was actually writing Zero’s stage, it did start to feel like a different episode, but I had a goal to reach and damn it, I was gonna get there! lol What’s good about this is that it moves Zero along in the stage without it being a real pain in the ass.

And that basically takes us to where the episode left off.

For the broken Central Museum part, I wrote X’s interactions with Phantom first. Then, with every Totem, I caught up to it as I could.  Once the Zero layering came about, things pieced together.  Same goes for any extra Villain narrations. The episode definitely started a certain way, and I wanted to keep that up as much as possible.  While also having Alia commentary, when appropriate and necessary.

I like this one. There’s a decent balance amidst all the nonsense I set up for myself.  And I definitely think that all these Portal Revisits are more interesting for X’s Nostalgic Nightmare encounters.  It spins the premise around that they didn’t just create a Nightmare Zero, but also a Nightmare Vile, a Nightmare Violen, a Nightmare Bit, a Nightmare Byte and now a Nightmare Double.  The possibilities are endless.

Yes, X’s mission is a complete side-quest, but guess what?  It makes you think that if he didn’t do this, the Nightmare would be that much worse for everyone later, down the road.  It’s Preventative Action.  It’s pretty neat.

Also, again - every Investigator thus far has been relatively good, but mislead in thinking that X was the enemy.  So once he’d explain it to them, they'd be at a standstill, and pretty much at a loss for motivation.  Go figure that Zero actually battles the evil ones with Infinity Flea and Blaze Phoenix.  But he’ll get a real taste for the good/mislead dilemma soon enough with Blizzard Wolfang.

Then we’ll see how I handle Metal Shark when I get there.  I’m looking forward to it.  I can’t believe I’m almost up to the 3rd Arc already!

But that’s exactly what I was getting at at the beginning of this rant.  This is definitely gonna be my last Season.  [Unless we get an X9 that suddenly ends all cliffhangers.] So with that said, I think the Nostalgic throwback was the right thing to do.  Show us that growth and remind us of where he’s been in a short time span, before we end things proper in MMX’s final season.

I’m getting misty eyed thinking about it already. =P

I’ll see you next time for Episode 14.

[justharuthings]

2019.

2019 was a year of firsts and lasts.

Looking back, I realized it is one of those years wherein I got to experience A LOT of things.

During the first few months of 2019, I was on my last stretch of my thesis. I was taking up Design 10 at that time. I swear, taking individual thesis is HARD. Maybe some of you prefer to work on their thesis alone to prevent conflicts between members, or to avoid having to argue with a member regarding ideas, or if ever some are not helping in the group. Well actually, I prefer that too, sometimes. But as an Architecture student, individual thesis is draining ㅡ physically, emotionally and financially (lol, ngl).

I cannot forget the day of our final defense. It was the most nerve-wracking experience for me because I have been always worrying about it because I am scared of speaking in front of others, but things happen …. and thesis, defended!

To be very honest, there were times wherein I want to give up, but I’m thankful for my friends. We kept on cheering and motivating each other that WE CAN finish this. I cannot forget those times wherein we were staying in our house, doing our thesis (which was actually during holy week) and suddenly, one of us were crying! Like, out of nowhere, she was crying, and we saw it and of course, we knew why, and we all started breaking down too, as well. How I miss those times...

We had our final defense on April 27 which was a Saturday and on the following day, April 28, I planned to meet my Inspirit friends to celebrate my defense and also to watch Avengers: Endgame. Luckily, a Sunggyu cup sleeve event is being held in Zoo Café at SM Megamall which is actually organized by one of our friends. So, we went there before and after watching Avengers. It was my first time attending a cup sleeve event here in the Philippines. I was actually wishing for more cup sleeve events, but little did I know that, that was the start… hahahahaha!

Then, months after, came our graduation day! I can say, it is the highlight of everyone’s college life. You walk up the stage, shake hands with your institute dean, and then receive your diploma. It was 5-years’ worth of tears, laughter ㅡ it was a roller-coaster of emotions.

Those past 5 years spent in college made me who I am today. I have learned how to be independent. I was staying in a dormitory since my first year of college until my last year. I learned how to budget my allowance well. Also, balancing my time between acads and fangirling. Hahaha!

5 years is indeed a long time, but I am happy to have met such amazing people throughout my entire stay. I will surely miss each and everyone of them, but I know, and I believe, that we will all be successful in our chosen field.

Moving on, I started looking for job weeks after graduation while, some of my friends went back to their provinces to have a vacation first. In my case, I only had around 2-3 weeks of rest? And I used that time to catch up with One Piece and all the other series I had to postpone watching because of my thesis. 

I swear, the waiting period after sending a resume to a company can make you go nuts. I mean, that is where your patience will be tested. I went to few interviews before I got in and started working around third week of August.

Before the end of the third quarter, I went to #UPALLNIGHTinManila. It was my first concert for this year, 2019. We were upgraded to Floor from Balcony Center. That night ended with a hi-touch event! We got to high five all the members and it was indeed a memorable night for me.

My second cup sleeve event for the year but, my first cup sleeve event for Day6! I actually thought I wouldn’t be able to attend this event because, Jae and my brother actually have the same birthday. So, I thought I’m spending the 15th of September at home but guess what? I made it to the event.

I literally spent that weekend celebrating birthdays. My brother’s birthday is actually on a Sunday, but we celebrated it the night before and after that, I went straight to my friend’s house to also celebrate hers. Good thing my friend’s house is actually just around Quezon City, so I was actually close to the venue.

Indeed, I had fun celebrating Jae’s birthday with my co-mydays! I wasn’t even expecting to be called in the raffle, but I went home with a Remember Us album! Hahaha! There were lots of freebies given on that day. We even met a new friend (finally, a sungjin stan haha), it was nice meeting new mutuals!

On to the last quarter of the year!

My first X1 cup sleeve event, but my third one for this year! I went to this event with Siege and my cousin, Ate Anne. The venue was actually crowded! Well, it was a small one, but there were lots of Oneits gathering inside so, it was jampacked. But it was a fun day! I met and made new friends in that event. But to our surprise, most of the attendees were still in senior high and college hahaha! I feel so old (lol).

Moving on, our squad planned a staycation on the last weekend of October. We rented out an Airbnb near SM North. We were lucky enough to find a beautiful one! It was like a hotel to be honest! Everything we can find inside is free! Even the coffee is from Starbucks and there is a French press available in the room. But the best part here was the large smart TV! We were playing MVs, reality shows non-stop!  

It was a tiring, but fun weekend spent with these people!

We were sleep deprived because of the intense round of Jenga! We actually stayed up till morning because of the game hahaha! The game itself was so intense but we were more focused because our biases are on the line.

Actually, we have planned this staycation way before an as far as I can remember, the only cup sleeve event we were supposed to attend was Yunseong’s, but I don’t know, this happened....

I thought I wouldn't be able to attend Seunghyub’s cup sleeve event because I have prior schedule at that time and I thought it already ended but as we were walking in the mall, we came across a café and I saw the TV was playing N.Flying music videos so I wondered why then I realized that the event is being held there!

On our last day of stay, we went out to attend Yunseong’s cup sleeve event happening on Flamingo Bloom at SM North. It was our first Woollimz cup sleeve event! Actually, this was the only event we were supposed to attend during our staycation, but we met a friend in the event and told us that there’s also an event happening at Lost Bread, still in SM North. It was an event for Eunsang and Wooseok. So, we went there after lunch then went back to Yunseong’s event.

An addition to my list of firsts this year, I attended a christening for the first time! It was Lyle’s christening. I actually went as a proxy to my cousin, Ate Anne, which was not around the country at the time. Ate JL was the first one in our circle of friends to have a baby and we were happy that we were invited. It was also our first time that our group meet in Cavite hahaha!

The four of us, together with Ate Dee, booked a place to stay for 3 days and 2 nights because we are actually going to have a reunion with our friend from Australia, Ate Nica! We spent the Friday night catching up while strolling around Araneta. On the following day, was DAY6’s concert.

#DAY6GRAVITYinMNL

I can say, this is one of the highlights of my 2019? My second concert for this year, and my second time seeing DAY6! I don’t know, but what I felt from that night seems surreal. It felt like I have become more closer to DAY6 ㅡ a step closer than before. It’s like my relationship with DAY6 grows deeper and deeper each year.

As expected in a Day6 concert, it always exceeds your expectation! It became an unforgettable night especially to PH MyDays because JAE CRIED.

“I don’t know about you, but I’m feeling 22!”

To conclude, this year was indeed a year of firsts and lasts. 2019 taught me lot of things. I am thankful to everyone I have met throughout the year. I will surely cherish all those moments spent with the people close to me. I can't wait to see were 2020 takes me!

Thank you, next!

[sweetdejun]

coterie: the mini rubik’s cube (1/2)

gang!x1 x fem!reader

synopsis: you’re an ordinary girl, with an ordinary life. but what happens when you catch the gang that is famous for keeping their deeds under the table, in action?

coterie’s masterlist can be found here

pairing: kim wooseok and y/n

a/n: some cursing, so proceed with caution.

“who’s is this?” you hold the small, colorful shape between your thumb and index finger, showing into the people in the room. there’s a silence in the air, and then you see the lilac haired boy lean over to “whisper” in the boy next to him’s ear, “hyung, what’s gonna happen now? do you think he’s even going to let her near him? he’s going to lose his shit.” “shh, dohyun. she chose this, after all,” he flicks the younger boy’s arm, who lets out a small yelp and rubs the inflicted area. your stomach churns as you playback the conversation in your head, and you shift your fear-filled gaze to seungwoo. he senses your discomfort and starts, “uh, y/n, you’re going to be working with,” and he gets cuts off by a slightly hoarse voice, “me.” you turn to the owner of the voice and find feline eyes glaring at you with an icy sternness. “i’m wooseok, although I did introduce myself a few seconds ago, you probably forgot my name already.” you scoff, taken aback and the rest of the boys watch the exchange between you two. “well, are you all just going to stand here and watch me?” they look back at wooseok, and one by one, left to different directions, followed by wooseok himself. you stand there in the center of the room, confused as to what just happened. “what now?” you pout, but nevertheless leave towards your room, too. the rubik’s cube is still in your hand, and you forgot it was in your hand until you saw that your hand was tightly clutching onto it. you’re sure that it left some form of indents into your hand, but that doesn’t matter. you only feel shudders when you remember the way wooseok was looking at you, with a fierce glower, while his demeanor seemed quite laid back. his hands were shoved in both pockets and he stood tall, yet slouched slightly; you wonder how that juxtaposition wouldn’t make sense normally, but he made it make sense. your thoughts are interrupted when the phone begins ringing. “hello?” you pick up, and it’s soonja, “miss l/n, mr. kim has called you into his room, and asks that you bring the rubik’s cube with you.” you assumed she was talking about wooseok, and confirmed this assumption when she mentioned the rubik’s cube. “right now?” “if possible, ma’am. he wanted you to come as soon as I called you. his room is on the ground floor, so you will need to return to the living room and it will be a room right in the corner of it.” and she hung up the phone. taking a moment to make sure your hair looks alright, you straighten out your clothes slightly, and proceed to wooseok’s room. 

there is this twinge of anxiety that bubbles within you as you begin getting closer to your destination. why did the other guys insinuate that wooseok was a wrong choice? you try not to think about all the things that could possibly go wrong, and subconsciously wrap your knuckles on the door. “come in,” you hear from the other side, and you twist the doorknob and push your way inside wooseok’s room. once you’re in, you’re left staring. in his room are about six screens, with different images on each screen. it seemed to just be a lot of information, and from what you understand you see IDs, passports, and things that look like official records. “oh, it’s you,” a voice breaks into your thoughts and you see wooseok sitting on a swivel chair, circle glasses resting on the bridge of his nose. if you didn’t know him at all, you probably would’ve gushed over how dorky he looked, but then the way he acted mere hours ago pops into your head. “uh, you wanted to see me?” wooseok’s gaze shifts from your face to your hand, which has the rubik’s cube. he outstretches his own and says, “give me the rubik’s cube.” eyebrows furrowed, you push it into his overeager hand, and he holds it in front of you, twisting the shape between his fingers. “what do you see here?” you’re confused, and it’s obvious in the way you answer, “a rubik’s cube?” he moves it to see your reaction, as he shakes his head ‘no’. “it’s a rubik’s cube to you, but I see an algorithm. I see tons of solutions but only one correct answer.” he puts the rubik’s cube down before turning back to you and folding his arms behind his back. “the screens you see in this room are just that, too. they help me crack these algorithms. and believe it or not, algorithms are more common than you think.” you scratch your arm, “so, what, are you like a hacker or something?” “close. I seek out information. if the team members need to know something about anything or anyone, they come to me. all they have to do is give me an hour or so, and I give them all the information they need.” once you hear this, it takes you a second or two before your eyes shoot up at him, “so when seungwoo told me that he knew all about me,” wooseok cuts you off, adjusting his glasses that slowly slid down. “yep, I gave him all that information.” and as freaked out as you should be, you let out a sound of awe, which takes wooseok aback. 

after he walks you through his entire database, your attention goes back to wooseok. you had preconceptions of the guy before walking into his room; the other members made it seem like he was going to murder you or something. but he’s not as bad as they made him out to be. but, you shouldn’t arrive at this conclusion too quickly, because when you look back up at wooseok, you see he’s stopped explaining and is now standing there, arms crossed and pursed lips. you raise the question, “so, what am I going to do?” wooseok answers this with a heartbeat, “like I’ve said, I know what you’re capable of, which is why I’m going to have you do some digging. as far as codes and stuff go, if you can’t get into something, I’ll take care of that. I’ve hacked into way too many things, so it’s child’s play for me. seungwoo’s already debriefed you, so I’ll tell you what our roles are: the other members need information on their people, what you’ll do is once I’ve hacked into certain systems, make files for each person, get down all the information that is required and then I’ll go through it and send it to the members.” you look back at him and the screens. “yeah, I guess I can do it.” you move your hand towards some of the stuff on the table and are about to examine it, when wooseok yanks your hand back, “what are you doing?!” he startles you with the loud voice he uses, and you free your hand from his grasp, “I was looking around, jeez. don’t have to bite my head off, dude.” you mumble the last part, and wooseok sighs, closing his eyes and resting his thumb and index fingers against his nose bridge. “I apologize for that, I don’t like it when people touch my stuff.” you fold your arms, “well then, how do you expect me to do stuff here?” wooseok blinks back at you emotionlessly, “I’ll get a computer installed in here, don’t worry about that. you’re going to need to make another commitment, in addition to helping me out here, though.” your eyebrow cocks up and he continued, “you’re gonna be my assistant. do whatever I ask you to do.” your eyes widen at this. just what did he want you to agree to? “don’t think wrong, I’ll just need you to run errands for me and occasionally bring me stuff, like food and shit. got it?” you consider the benefits and drawbacks of the job: sure, you’d be safe and sound and aren’t necessarily dealing with people one-on-one, so that’s great, but what if this illegal activity makes it on your record somehow? what would you do then? but then you look up and notice some hint of emotion in wooseok’s face and this was the first time he’s expressed emotion of any form during your conversation. when are you ever going to get an opportunity like this again, you think and you exhale before responding, “alright, I can do it.”