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samwisethewitch · 4 years ago

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Earth-Friendly Witchcraft

Whatever religious or spiritual tradition they identify with, most witches agree that there is something sacred about the natural world. We draw our power from the earth beneath our feet, the sky over our heads, and the air in our lungs.

And yet, many of us live in societies that are actively contributing to the destruction of the natural world. Most developed nations have a linear economy, which means resources are extracted and then sent on a one-way trip to consumers who will use them and then throw them away. This leads to overflowing landfills, air and water pollution, and quickly disappearing resources. The World Economic Forum predicts that, if our habits don’t change, there will be more plastic than fish in the ocean by 2050. And I dearly hope that by now we’re all familiar with the reality of climate change and its devastating impact on global ecosystems.

I’m not trying to scare you, but I do want to point out the hypocrisy of drawing power from the Earth in our magic while simultaneously contributing to her destruction. If we truly want to consider ourselves spiritual allies of the planet, we need to make an effort to live our lives — and practice our magic — in ways that are less harmful to her.

You don’t have to become an environmentalist or switch to a zero waste lifestyle, but we can all make little changes for a more sustainable life. There’s lots of information out there about how to live a more Earth-friendly lifestyle, so in this post I’ll be focusing on how to apply that same philosophy to your witchcraft.

Steps to a more Earth-Friendly Practice:

Limiting your consumption will automatically lower your negative impact on the planet. Follow my previous guidelines for avoiding consumerism to start shrinking your carbon footprint.

Avoid plastic as much as possible. According to the WEF, 70% of our plastic ends up in a landfill or in the world’s waterways, and according to Julia Watkins, author of Simply Living Well, only 9% of household plastics get recycled. Plastic (unlike glass and metal) cannot be recycled indefinitely — it can only be recycled a handful of times before it becomes too degraded to be repurposed any further. There really is no way to make plastic safer for the planet, so it’s best to just avoid it altogether. Look for tools made of metal, wood, or glass instead of plastics, and try to order things shipped in paper and cardboard when possible.

Create spells that won’t leave leftovers. One of the big contributing factors to our current environmental crisis is that we just produce too much waste. You can avoid this in your magical practice by crafting spells that won’t leave you throwing away a big ball of candle wax, herbs, and paper. Kitchen magic is a no-brainer for this, since kitchen spells are meant to be eaten. If you want to do a candle spell, use small candles that will burn up completely — I find larger candles are more likely to leave leftover wax. Making magical bath salts is another great option for leftover-free spells — just make sure everything you include is safe to go down the drain and won’t contribute to water pollution!

Forage for your own spell materials. One of the best ways to avoid plastic packaging and cut down on emissions from shipping is to use materials from your backyard! Learn about the plants, animals, and minerals native to your area, and take regular nature walks where you can gather what you need. Remember to only take as much as you need and to be careful never to damage the plants you harvest from. Make sure to carefully disinfect any animals bits you pick up — you can do this by burying them in salt for a full moon cycle and/or setting them in the sun/under a UV light for several days. If you find a dead animal and want to strip and clean its bones for use in ritual, this is a much more involved process and will require special research, equipment, and lots of time. And, of course, never eat anything you have foraged unless you happen to have an advanced degree in botany.

Keep a magical garden. Another great way to connect with the planet and shrink your carbon footprint is to grow your own herbs, vegetables, and fruits. You can, of course, grow food for your kitchen if you have space, but even if you live in a tiny apartment you can grow a handful of magical herbs in pots. For a list of common houseplants and their magical associations, check out this post.

Shop for spell materials at a local farmer’s market. Buying local is a great way to avoid the environmental impact of shipping produce, and it allows you to support small farms. Farmer’s markets also typically carry seasonal produce, which can help you align your magical practice with the cycles of nature. Farmer’s markets are a great way to find seasonal fruits and vegetables for kitchen magic, but you can use the produce you find there for other types of spells as well.

Trade paraffin wax candles for beeswax or soy wax. Paraffin, the material used for most cheap candles, is a by-product of crude oil, which is not only highly unsustainable but contains carcinogens (chemicals that may cause cancer). Beeswax is a sustainable alternative, and beeswax candles produce a “clean” burn, meaning it does not negatively affect air quality. Soy wax is a slightly pricier, vegan-friendly sustainable option that also produces a clean burn.

Use undyed, unbleached paper for your written spells. The bleaches and dyes used in most commercially available paper have a toxic effect on the environment. Colored paper cannot be recycled or composted because it will contaminate everything it touches. Use plain, unbleached paper for your written spells, especially if you plan to bury them in the ground or dispose of them outside.

Make sure your essential oils are ethically harvested. Essential oils are tricky — although they are marketed as natural, many of them are produced through unsustainable methods. Because essential oils are concentrated, it may take thousands of pounds of plants to produce a single pound of oil. This can have a devastating impact, especially for endangered plants like white sage or palo santo. Look for ethically-sourced, wild-harvested essential oils — these are oils that are gathered from the wild in ways that don’t hurt the local ecosystem. Mountain Rose Herbs and Eden’s Garden are two brands that are committed to sustainable essential oil production.

Instead of burying a spell in a jar, bury it in a hollowed-out fruit or vegetable. Many traditions call for spells to be buried in the ground. Items like jar spells and witch bottles are traditionally buried on the witch’s property. The problem with this is that plastic and glass bottles do not biodegrade, and will remain in the ground for years. Instead of putting these materials in the ground, bury your spells in a hollowed-out fruit or vegetable. As a bonus, you can choose this item to support your intention. For example, you might use an apple for a love spell or a spicy pepper for protection. Just make sure everything inside the spell is also biodegradable!

Keep a compost pile as an offering to your local land spirits. Compost is an easy way to reduce food waste, and it gives your garden a boost! Even if you don’t have your own garden, you can give your compost to a fiend who does or look into donating it to a community garden. When composting, it’s important to maintain a balance between carbon-rich “brown” ingredients (leaves, undyed paper, cardboard, etc.) and nitrogen-rich “greens” (fruit and veggie scraps, coffee grounds, egg shells, etc.) — you want about four times as much brown as green in your compost. Start your compost with a layer of brown — preferably twigs or straw to allow good airflow. Alternate layers of green and brown materials as you add to the pile. Every time you add to your compost, verbally express your gratitude to the land spirits. Your compost should be moist, but not soggy — you’ll know it’s ready when it’s dark and crumbly and smells like soil.

Make your own tea blends with loose herbs and a reusable tea strainer instead of buying teabags. Witches and tea go together like peanut butter and chocolate, but the individual wrappers on teabags create a lot of waste. On top of that, since many of these wrappers are dyed, they may not even be recyclable. Keep your teas earth-friendly by buying dried herbs in bulk and blending your own teas. Making your own blends is not only better for the planet, but also allows you to choose each ingredient for a specific magical intention.

Find ways to use your trash in your craft. This one is pretty self-explanatory. Instead of throwing things away, find ways to use them in your magic! Use food scraps from cooking, like carrot greens and potato peels, in spells. Turn an old shoe box into a travel altar. Add your coffee grounds to spells to ground them and manifest results in the physical world. You get the idea. Be creative!

Research different models for Earth-friendly living, like the zero waste/low waste lifestyle, sustainability, and the solarpunk movement. This will give you more ideas for a sustainable lifestyle, as well as a sustainable magical practice.

The funny thing about Earth-friendly living is that, the more time you spend taking care of the planet, the more connected you feel to it. I encourage you to try some of the ideas on this list — you’ll be amazed by how quickly you develop a deeper relationship with the Earth and all her creatures.

Resources:

Of Blood and Bones by Kate Freuler

Simply Living Well by Julia Watkins

“By 2050, there will be more plastic than fish in the world’s oceans, study says” from The Washington Post

A Sustainable Mind podcast

Practical(ly) Zero Waste podcast

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princesscandijane · 4 years ago

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Males Reasons to Shave with some tips

A quick guide for those wanting to shave, but cannot seem to find the reasons to. As well as some tips on how to shave.

Groin

As a favor for someone going down on you. Think about how much you enjoy pulling pubes out of your teeth. I shave my groin every morning, as part of my morning routine. Takes me no less time to shave my face if you do it daily, and I could probably go every other day without notice.

Shaving Groin

From various blogs and articles

Trim—Bust out your trimmer and prep the area by trimming off a good chunk of the bush before you dive in with a razor. This helps ensure that you have total visibility and don’t miss any important areas. Take your time, trimming in small sections starting at the bottom and working your way up to the stomach.

Shave—Generously apply shave cream that you can see through, creating a layer of cream about a millimeter thick on top of the areas where you want to shave. Holding the skin taut with one hand and taking it extra-slow with the other, lightly shave IN THE DIRECTION that the hair grows. Avoid using too much pressure. Rinse the razor with every pass and, when completely done shaving, rinse the body with warm water.

Use a new/sharp razor– DON’T use a dull blade or disposable razor.

Shave Your Balls—The golden rule of ball-shaving is to always hold the skin taut so there are no wrinkles or curves that could catch skin or cause cuts.

Rinse with Cool Water—Make sure you give your junk a good rinse in cool water after you’re done shaving to soothe the skin and close the pores. This will also help prevent any ingrown hairs or irritation.

Asshole

Dingleberries. If you have ever had to wipe away a dingleberry, that should inspire you to at least trim around the asshole. Full shave can be difficult, but again, how attractive do you find a hairy ass? So consider trimming. I don’t shave completely because I’m worried about nicking something, so I wear a butt plug and shave around it.

Guide to Asshole shaving

https://www.reddit.com/r/NoStupidQuestions/comments/27dh1x/how_do_i_shave_my_asshole/

Use a moustache/nose hair trimmer to trim off all the excess hair until it's short enough to feel like 2 day old stubble, and then apply good hair conditioner or shaving gel and exfoliate using a loofah or washcloth. The idea is to get all the hair up and on end and stimulate the skin while opening the pores; this avoids ingrown hair and razor burn, which you do not want on your butthole.

Now wash your butthole. Intensely. You do not want to leave any stone unturned, so to speak. Shove your soapy finger up there and really get your sphincters squeaky clean. Don't hurt yourself, just make sure you don't have any icky fecal matter or tiny sharp hair nuggets trapped in the mysterious crevices of your anal caverns.

Use a BRAND NEW 4-blade disposable razor/razor blade cartridge. Don't use a dull blade or you will regret it. Shave with the grain, first, not against it. Rinse after each and every stroke of the blade against your skin. Re-apply conditioner/gel and shave again, this time against the grain and again be sure to rinse after every stroke. Rinse completely and then give it a quick wash with some plain antibacterial soap (kills bacteria on the open skin so should avoid irritation from fecal matter etc that you may have missed during your butthole cleansing).

Now comes the rough part - preventative care. Grab a bottle of witch hazel and spritz it on a washcloth, and pat the fuck out of your butthole with that shit. IT WILL BURN LIKE HELL FOR A SECOND IF YOU DO IT RIGHT. It is not the end of the world. Your butthole is not on fire and you will live to poo another day. After witch hazel-ing the hell out of your ass, lay tummy-down on your bed or on a towel on the floor and either:

When your butthole has been sufficiently aired out and dried, apply non-scented women's roll-on deodorant. This sounds stupid and weird but trust me, it helps. Dove no-scent is the best I've found. This will avoid chafing while walking, irritation as the hair grows back, general stink, and will provide you with some cushioning.

Chest, Back, Arms, Armpits

Do you think any of them are naturally smooth? Once a week I take a nice hot bath, relax with a bowl and shave everything below my neck. Takes me an hour at most.

I think we can acknowledge that a smooth body is sexy regardless of gender. How weird would it be for there to be hair

Vs. how is this for hair?

Once a week shaving. The more often you keep up with it the easier it is and the less time it takes.

Shaving Chest Tips

various blogs

Before beginning to shave, be sure to trim any long chest hairs to make the process easier.

Apply plenty of shaving gel over your chest and any other areas that you intend to shave.

Begin shaving, using short, gentle, and slow strokes for a clean shave without any nicks or cuts.

After each stroke, rinse the blade to avoid getting it clogged and causing a messy shave.

Once you’ve completed shaving and removed all unwanted hair, rinse your chest thoroughly and apply an aftershave product, such as the one that you use for your face.

Remember to also exfoliate the area twice a week with a quality body scrub to reduce the risk of ingrown hairs.

As the nipple is really sensitive and may not want to risk a nik, I recommend using a tweezer. Before you tweeze, take a hot shower—the heat will open up hair follicles, so it’s easier to grab the root—and pat the skin around your nipples dry. Pull each strand quickly and firmly in the direction your hair grows.

Shaving Armpit

from Men’s Health

Trim Your Armpit Hair First

If you’ve never shaved your underarms before, chances are you’ll need to trim those patches down for the easiest and most comfortable shave . It’ll make less of a mess in the shower as well (because nothing is worse than a clogged drain full of man-hair).

Exfoliate Your Under Arms Before Shaving

Sure, you don’t have to exfoliate, but you should to avoid pesky, painful ingrown hairs. A loofah or exfoliating body scrub will do the trick to remove dead skin cells and bacteria (along with any deodorant gunk) to help you achieve the smoothest shave without razor burn.

Shave Your Armpits Wet in the Shower

You can cut it dry, but Whitely recommends to do it in the shower. Hot water softens the hair and reduces the risk of pulled hair or nicks, he says. Shave towards the end of your time in the shower and use shaving gel for added moisture to prevent irritation.

Shave Slow and With a Good Razor

It's not a race, folks. To avoid razor burn and skin irritation, take it slow with your razor blade to make sure you get the closest shave. Unlike the hair on your face, underarm hair grows in all different directions, so make sure to shave sideways, as well top-to-bottom. Toss your old dull razor, and opt for one with a sharp blade and a pivoting head to move with the curves of your armpits for a more effective, easier shave.

Legs

First shaved legs feel amazing. Everyone deserves to know the feeling of freshly shaved legs. Second how are hairy legs, feet, and toes sexy?

Quick guide to shaving legs

Taken from Glamor and Cosmopolitan

1. Trim

If it's the first time you're removing your leg hair, you might want to carefully trim the area with an electric razor. This will stop your razor clogging up, causing you to miss patches of hair.

2. Soak your skin before shaving

“Hydrating the hairs makes them up to 60 per cent easier to cut”, says Dr Anita Sturnham, Venus Ambassador. “Soak your skin for two to three minutes before shaving.”

Use warm water when you're bent over the bathtub in the middle of winter with goose bumps on your legs, it's tempting to have the shower on boiling hot. But hot water is not your friend when it comes to shaving because it closes your pores. Warm water opens your pores, allowing your hairs to soften (making the whole shaving process a lot smoother).

3. Do not lather your legs with shampoo

Dr Sturnham says using shampoo or body wash as shave prep can, “increase your risk of redness and irritation, and blunt your razor blades.”

4. Don't go ham on the shaving cream

You really only need a thin layer of shaving cream to do the job. Too much will clog up your blades, slowing down your shaving time and making it impossible to see where you already shaved. Of course you don't really need to buy shaving cream in the first place, hair conditioner works just as well (if not better).

5. Always shave against the direction hair growth

To get your closest shave possible, shave against the direction of your hair growth. For the legs, start at the ankle and work your way up towards the knee.If you’re using a good blade, this won’t cause any irritation and will cut the hair right at the root for a longer-lasting shave.

6. Don't apply too much pressure to your razor

Your razor shouldn’t make a dent in your skin in order to work.“ The razor should glide across the skin, not drag”, says Adam Boulding, Venus Scientific Communications. “Remember to use a light touch, exerting as little pressure as possible.”If you need to press your razor firmly to work, it can be a sign your blades need changing.

7. Short strokes

If you're shaving from your ankle to your knee in one long stroke, you are guaranteed to have missed hairs. It's just impossible for your razor to keep contact with every single hair for that long. That's why you need to shave with short strokes. Short strokes = less missed hairs.

8. Change your razor blades regularly

A blunt blade not only increases friction against the skin, but also the likelihood of missed hairs. There are many factors that can impact blade life, including your hair type, how much of your body you’re shaving and how you store your razor. Roughly every ten shaves. If you shave daily then about every 1-2 weeks, if you shave 2-3 times a day then every 3-4 weeks. You should also change your blades whenever you start to feel tugging or pulling during your shave.

9. Don't use razors with less than four blades

The number of blades you use is actually super important. The less blades you have, the higher the chance of cuts and nicks.

“A razor with more blades means that the pressure is distributed across more evenly”, says Boulding. “Therefore less pressure is applied to any one spot of skin during the shave, reducing the probability of cuts.”

10. Use a manoeuvrable razor head

The second thing to look for in terms of razor quality is the manoeuvrability of the razor head. When it comes to the backs of knees and areas like ankles, where the bone is close to the skin surface, you need a razor that moves with the curves of your skin to glide over trickier areas. A stagnant blade will only increase the chance of missed hairs or cuts.

11. Always bend a knee

Knees are notoriously the most tricky spot to shave. The solution? Sarah says to slightly bend the knee.

“This will pull the skin tight before shaving, as folded skin is difficult to shave.”

Try propping your leg up on the side of the bath.

12. Don't forget your aftercare

If you suffer from red bumps after shaving, rinsing properly is a must post-shave. If you can bare cold water, this is even better to ensure the pores are closed.

Sarah also recommends leaving the skin to rest for at least 30 minutes before applying lotions or moisturisers, to avoid inflammation.

“If you must moisturise immediately following shaving, select a cream formula rather than a lotion, and avoid exfoliating moisturisers that may contain alpha hydroxy acids,” she adds. If not, it will sting!

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ohnobjyx · 4 years ago

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I've seen so many sol0 fans or just people that have watched cql and cares for the cast, talking about how they feel that bjyx is something one sided and unrequited. some comments about how xz (in the later fan meetings) is kinda just patiently indulging yb but clearly was not v happy about it. Sometimes I do think xz is more reserved and seems to try to "tame" yb to be more discreet about their, whatever it is, thing but i don't particularly think he is cold? What do you think?

I know it may sound odd but is there some analysis about Xiao feelings towards Yibo? I mean this guy is head over heels for him, no doubt about that but I don’t really feel the same from Xiao? I mean I could be wrong since I’m new there and didn’t read a lot of analysis so if you have some can you link them please? Thank you! And I don’t ask this in a « wrong » way like I genuinely feel like there’s something but I don’t see the same feelings towards each other. Again, I could be wrong!

Hi, anons. These asks has been sitting for the longest time in my inbox, so I decided to tackle them today (still writing two days later, I’ve desisted on creating a more organized post and I’m just dumping my thoughts here this time).

(It’s also that I’m frustrated about this, because these are two of the most polite ones, but I’ve also received others less well worded ones, that basically imply that there’s nothing from gg).

For the anon asking for some analysis, I’ll leave a link here to a post that basically sums up my own thoughts.

Disclaimer: as always, don’t take bjyx seriously. Pure speculation here.

Long post.

Before I start, I want to say that I shouldn’t be the one to convince you to anything. It’s never my intention to impart the “universal truth” or to be patronising. If any of you really feels that there’s nothing from gg, no matter what I say, you won’t be convinced by my post alone. And it’s alright to agree to disagree. Just keep it in mind.

I feel that what anons describe it’s something that often happens to new bxg. Dd’s so obvious, so painfully obvious that in comparison, gg is much more “discreet” (well, we had to learn to read Lan Wangji’s expressions, didn’t we? The same happens with gg’s gestures). I don’t agree with the idea of dismissing someone’s love just because they aren’t as obvious and as telling as their partner at first glance (gg’s songs and drawings aren’t as straightforward, but they are there for those who care to listen and see).

From my pov, I think it’s very very probable that they are together. So, that works both ways for me. I don’t think dd’s love unrequited. They take care of each other in ways that speak of a high level of trust, intimacy and chemistry (yes, I initially wrote that post for these asks). I’ve talked about subtle ways to display your love, because when you love someone it’s difficult to hide it, and gg has a hard time trying to hide for the cameras.

(I’m still thinking of Happy Camp, when dd hurt his neck with the necklace... gg’s reaction wasn’t controlled in the slightest, and the combination of worry and anger would be a interesting combo if gg indeed wasn’t anything to dd or if he hadn’t gifted him the necklace).

Gg often has a hard time controlling his reactions when dd is involved. He’s much more natural, a lot closer to how he really is instead of his very polite and soft public persona. He get a glimpse of him in the bts (I suppose they never expected CQL to be so popular, and didn’t thought that the bts would be so watched a year afterwards), and comparing how he is in the bts with dd to how he usually is in other interviews and events with other people is a very interesting exercise.

It’s true that gg in the interviews seemed to try to hold back dd, to the point that they both lied sometimes in the interviews... the effect they caused was contrary to what they wanted. Definitely. Because they tended to forget what they had lied about, and the “plot” had holes everywhere. Like gg reacting surprised to the possibility of dd starting a fashion brand. Twice. In the same day. Or the eggplant/carrots thing. Or the “I didn’t know you slept with the lights on, but I’m aware of your sleeping pattern” thing. Please note that these three plot holes were caused by gg (in the second case, I’m refering to carrots ofc).

About what the first anon says of “how xz (in the later fan meetings) is kinda just patiently indulging yb but clearly was not v happy about it”. It’s one thing that by then they’d have noticed that their cp had attracted a whole lot more attention that they had ever expected it to and a whole another thing to “indulge” someone (as if only dd wanted it and gg had nothing to say about it) and “not be very happy about it”. Gg might have tried, but even he couldn’t completely erase all of the little moments directed at dd (and you have to take into account that gg was actually sick in the last fan meeting in Nanjing, that’s bound to affect his mood too).

(There’s no one else when they look at each other. No wonder Wen Ning achieved such a third wheel look when they were filming the boat scene, I suppose it’s taken from real life).

How gg looks at dd and only smirks when dd looks up... well, gg still makes his best effort at being discreet...

And dd in this moment... well, what can one do when a man like gg looks at you like that? (dd.exe has stopped working. Please restart).

Source of the gifs: 仙娱

Last but not least, I’d like to talk a little about W/ibo Night, the main source of many people’s doubts. I’ve seen many analysis, from “poor puppy dd following gg around” (that’s... bs) to some better analysis that deserve to be taken into account.

W/ibo Night is an event organized by a state controlled social media platform. It’s one of the most observed events of the years, with potential future employers and coworkers, apart from the government, so it’s not just them, but everyone is very serious and controlled in their actions.

They obviously had agreed beforehand on how to behave in this one. While dd is very serious, he doesn’t seem angry or sad that gg isn’t looking his way. However, they both can’t help but look in each other’s direction (gg’s more discreet, but pay attention and you’ll see him side glancing at dd at least three times on stage) and the way dd turns just so he can have a look at gg is... 🤦

They tried so hard that it ended up getting the effect they wanted to avoid: when everybody else was greeting each other (friendly hadshakes, patting their backs, etc.) these two just stood there, a little awkwardly. It became obvious to most people that they were acting as if they were strangers.

I think (speculation here) that while they had agreed to act as if they didn’t know each other, gg was... off that night. His eyes were very bright (as if teary, so not in a good way) and his smiles were tense, so I’d say in a bad mood or maybe he was feeling under the weather. I think dd was worried, so that’s why he kept glancing at him (I’ve read about the rumours of why gg was like that, but I tend to dismiss them if there’s no proof).

For someone as polite as gg, to walk so obviously in front of dd when they were getting on stage (c-culture here: the one who walks in front has more seniority/authority, so gg always lets the other people walk in front of him as a sign of politeness and respect), speaks of a familiarity that exceeds that of coworkers. Dd’s actions need no more words: waiting for gg and letting him walk in front comes naturally to him.

Choosing fans (though at first, dd just looks at gg choose his). I don’t know if you remember, but gg chose “I can do it” and dd chose “I have it difficult” (as a way of saying “I can’t”). I think it was entirely a coincidence, because dd was looking at his gg choosing his fan, the one he had wanted at first was taken by another person, so he chose this one as “I couldn’t take the fan I wanted” and “it’s difficult for me to choose”.

However, look at the happy and surprised smile from gg when he notices that his fan and dd’s make a pair (similar to “yes” and “no”, gg had filmed an ad for the event in which he linked this two exact phrases as opposites). A sad spoiler: this is the only time he truly, spontaneously smiles at the event (and notice how dd’s face inmediately mirrors gg’s and how he tries to rein it in a second later).

I couldn’t find a video, but just before leaving the stage, dd looks at gg again and shakes his fan. Without a single word, gg understands that dd is asking from where to leave the stage, and makes the slightest movement with his fan to point the way. I assure you, this level of 默契 (mo qi) is difficult to find even in established long time relationships.

Once they are seated, gg leaves for a second and tells dd “I’m leaving” and dd answers “okay”. There’d be no need for this interaction unless they’re still friends/couple.

This one broke my heart a little: dd had been sitting on a plastic bottle the whole time. Usually gg clears his seat when dd comes (Nanjing fan meeting, Tencent awards night), probably because he has noticed that dd doesn’t care that he’s sitting on things. Dd left earlier the event because of his schedule, and once gg came back from getting his w/ibo king award, he sits on dd’s seat. And notices the water bottle under him. Even his poker face can’t hide the sad fondness “aiyo this boy...”

Some say he sat in the seat next to dd’s, but there’s a video I can’t seem to find (the despair is real) of gg sitting on the water bottle, so it’s indeed dd’s seat.

Also, you may try to think this from your own perspective: when and why would you sit in another person’s seat in an event as important as this one? If I try to answer this from my pov, I’d say that first I’d need to know that that person wouldn’t mind me sitting there and/or knowing that this person isn’t going to come back to the event. In both cases, it requires communication and trust between these two people. Gg had to know that dd was leaving first (and why would dd tell gg if not because they chat about their work schedules?) and that dd wouldn’t mind once the fancams made it to social media. This is what I think, at least.

Okay, so here ends my post. I just exposed some of my thoughts on why I think yizhan is NOT one sided or unrequited. But of course, you’re allowed to disagree with me, anons, since we are all in the speculation ground here. Nonetheless, note that this is a yizhan/bjyx blog, which implies (at least for me) that there are feelings from both sides, so I may not interact further with one-sided yizhan/bjyx asks.

(BTW, I found a very complete post of moments where yizhan isn’t one sided here, so I decided not to elaborate on those moments in this post).

#yizhan #bjyx #not one sided #but I think people need to see that for themselves #I don't want to be a preacher here #so this is still my opinion

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wantaichi · 5 years ago

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haikyuu + skincare hcs

ever think abt how they treat their skin? probably not. but like. do they wash their face like a normal person? have a 32 step skincare routine maybe??

msg me for any character who’s not here and i’ll drop their routine for u

masterlist.

karasuno

sugawara. lives up to his title as mr. refreshing. cleanses, tones, and moisturizes. !chefs kiss! keeps a jar of aloe vera face gel in his fridge, his mom had a spare. carries around a 100-sheet pack of oil film, more out of habit than of need. good skincare just makes him feel in control of his life, ok

ennoshita. fuckin’ spotless. part of the 0.0001% who don’t sweat easily. doesn’t have a complete regimen but never skips out on cleansing and toning before bed. actually reads the product ingredients and googles the benefits before buying. neutrogena type of guy.

asahi. facial scrubs are his holy grail. like. dead skin? stubborn hair follicles? haha not on his watch ヾ( ･`⌓´･)ﾉﾞ trims his goatee every 3-4 week bc a well-groomed beard goes hand in hand with proper skincare. a sucker for aromatic products. lavender? shea butter? SOLD.

daichi. “healthy lifestyle is key to healthy skin“ typa dude. rly just thinks natural is the way to go. drinks 8 glasses of water, eats his veggies, exercises regularly, gets 8 hours of sleep. sounds like smth off wikihow if u ask me. probably is.

tsukishima. cetaphil hoe. brand loyalty embodied. on it for 5++ years, and never once considered switching. BUT. his routine ends at step 1. cleanse. and that’s it. the fuck he need a 32 step skincare routine for? long as he gets a day’s worth of grime and dirt off his face, he gucci

yamaguchi. sensitive skin’s got him constantly changing/exploring different products. rode on tsukki’s cetaphil agenda for the first few years of puberty (rly just out of curiousity) but dropped out when his skin got used to it. thinks pimple patches are a blessing to mankind.

tanaka. fuck. chaotic greasy. asks for oil film from suga just to stick it on his forehead, lets it stay there. uses whatever’s in the bathroom to wash off, aka majority of saeko’s products. got yelled at once to “get his greasy ass over here” and got slabbed with aztec healing clay mask. converted to clay mask hoe after 20 minutes. “mm this shit’s dope!”

nishinoya. fuck. chaotic greasy part ii. but make it baby face. only does skincare when chillin at the tanakas. homie got him to try the clay mask bc chick’s dig that. “bro, u mean the mask or boys who do the mask?” “both bro” “awshit bro gimme that” thinks splashing some water twice a week is enough

kageyama. ? this yalls mans? oblivious to the whole concept of skincare, only acknowledges general hygiene. uses whatever’s on the soap holder to wash his face. probably dove. doesnt really have much skin problems to begin with, only breaks out once a year. living proof that god has favorites.

hinata. only started taking skincare seriously that time a huge ass zit grew on his chin. yachi offered him her unfinished bottle of cosrx (she’s a hoarder and u kno it), and has since been giving him all her leftover bottles. basically gets to use good quality products for free smh

nekoma

kuroo. not very big on the idea of skincare per se, but supports any brand on that cruelty-free and vegan agenda. reads the product ingredients like a children’s book. “mm phenoxyethanol and retinyl palmitate.. i’ll take it.” always leaves the saleslady stunned.

kenma. too lazy to adopt a routine. but regularly uses his mom’s facial wash. you know. those mom brands. has a stash of facemasks from lev’s trip to korea —> only form of skincare he actually appreciates bc he can simultaneously play his games and be all bout dat self care

lev. abuses his perks of having a sister. casually uses all alisa’s imported, high end stuff. la prairie. estee lauder. la mer. and she doesn’t mind bc her “levochka deserves all the finest things”. boujee ass russians

yaku. baby face. when god made it rain collagen, he was freestylin in a pool full of it while we was all sleepin. doesn’t exert much effort, just cleanses and tones bc it’s part of proper hygiene. girls envy him. parents in their 40s wanna be him.

seijoh

oikawa. SKINCARE HOE KING. fuckin high maintenance. goes to the derma for his monthly laser facial treatment. on broke days, he settles for a diamond peel. skin so smooth it puts the entire female population to shame. spends his savings on those clinique eye creams. probably modeled for the face shop once

iwaizumi. homie reeks of male cleanser. might either dove men or nivea men. there’s no in between. oikawa internally screams everytime he witnesses his bff wash his face. two words. aggressive. rubbing. bordering on hostile he might actually skin his face off

mattsun and makki. fuck. drugstore cleansers. the ones that come in sachets. agreed to take turns in buying bundles for sharing. sometimes sneaks a pinch from oikawa’s clinique products when he’s not looking. haha dumb hoe. may have an addiction to charcoal nose pore strips just so they can compare blackheads

fukurodani

bokuto. buys whatever’s on sale idfk. genuinely wants to get on kuroo’s go green agenda but too lazy to look around the store. normally just uses the bubbles from his soap or shampoo. his belief: if it cleans his hands and his ass, then it can fuckin clean his face too

akaashi. healthy lifestyle + decent regimen = pretty skin. cleanses and tones. tried his mom’s aloe vera face gel once and got hooked. shit’s relaxing as hell. owns a bunch of facemasks, sometimes uses but keeps forgetting to take them off before falling asleep. uwu af

dateko

futakuchi. doesn’t have a routine cause “who tf needs that” and “obviously not me.” or so he says. secretly the biggest spender on skincare in all of dateko. owns a bunch of anti wrinkle products and probably one of those jade rollers. but no one needs to know that. just wants everyone to think he’s naturally pretty

aone. told by futakuchi that “knitting your brows too much causes premature wrinkles, but not like i’m an expert on that hhhahaha dont get me wrong.” can’t rly do anything bout it. he was born with that face. also buys whatever’s on sale

shiratorizawa

ushijima. surprisingly blemish free? but not entirely smooth? just spotless? basically a rock? never went past step 1: cleanse. never realized he’s been skipping out the 31 next steps. cetaphil hoe.

tendou. dry. crusty. compensates by sweating a lot through practice. might be effective if he’d stop leaving the foam on longer than recommended, thus leaving his skin dryer than his love life. yeah, i went there.

shirabu. flawless at first glance. until you lift those uneven ass bangs. tbh its nothing serious except “are we gonna ignore the fact that his whiteheads follow the shape of his bangs” as pointed out by tendou. uses whatever cleanser his mom buys for him

semi. decent skin care routine. a big boy who’s fairly knowledgeable on other brands outside cetaphil and dove/garnier/nivea men. takes him less than 5 minutes to pick a product bc he’s tried them all, knows what works, knows his skin type in and out. stan semi for clear skin.

see inarizaki + sakusa here

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readyplayerhobi · 5 years ago

Text

Flower | 29

; Hoseok x Reader

;Genre: Fluff, slight angst

; Warnings: Discussions of periods and contraception

; Word Count: 4.6k

; Synopsis: You finally decide to take a dip into the world of online dating and find the Flower dating app. One of the top matches for you proves to be a guy who looks to be your complete opposite; tattooed, pierced, a metalhead and oh…incredibly handsome. What happens when you throw caution to the wind and reach out to him?

; A/N: I know it’s taking a long time for me to update this but I hope you enjoy it :D Please reblog if you do and let me know what you think my commenting on this or sending me an ask!

; Flower Masterpost

“Hey, meeps,” You hear Hoseok’s voice calling to you from the end of the aisle, his new nickname for you now gaining its own nickname as well. “If sunflower oil is made from sunflowers, and coconut oil is made from coconuts...then baby oil…”

He trails off, raising his eyebrows and giving you a scandalous look as he holds up a bottle of baby oil. For a moment, you just stare at him blankly before sighing and rolling your eyes in amusement. Taking the bottle from him, you place it back down onto the shelf before linking your arm through his.

Thankfully, he lets you direct him back to the little section they have in this makeup and skincare store that’s fully dedicated to Korean beauty. This is one of those strange stores where they have tons of products that are basically on sale yet also have branded stuff alongside it. Not that you cared though; it had the Korean brands you swore by for your skin and you were more than tempted to try out the Japanese beauty stand next to it.

For someone who isn’t particularly bothered about the whole concept of skincare, though you had managed to convince him to at least improve his routine, Hoseok was being a pretty good boyfriend right now. He hadn’t complained about the half an hour you’d spent perusing the makeup to find new stuff to put into your collection and he still wasn’t complaining as you filled your basket with face masks.

If anything, he’d managed to entertain himself quite well.

But you think he was being good purely because you’d gone with him to a concert last night. It had been for one of his favourite bands, Metallica, and he’d ended up with a spare ticket as Jungkook had ended up ill with food poisoning. He had been about to go on his own, but you hadn’t liked the thought of him being lonely so you’d gone with him.

You’d recognised some of the songs they’d played from whenever Hoseok played them in the car or the house but it hadn’t been your scene. Still, it had been fun enough and you’d more than enjoyed seeing Hoseok happy as he’d rocked out to his beloved band.

It did mean that you were exceptionally tired today though as the two of you hadn’t gotten home from the stadium they’d performed in until after 2 am. That had been the closest performance apparently and you’d been shattered, sleeping until well after 11 am. Hoseok had promised you a day of relaxation, which you’d jumped on by asking him to do a full Korean skincare routine with you tonight.

He’d agreed, and you’d eagerly dragged him out to this store to replenish your supplies. The makeup was just because it was there and you couldn’t resist it. Already you were coming up with ideas for looks in your head that you could create and then put onto your Instagram. Moving places had meant that you hadn’t done many looks lately and you were eager to change that.

Especially now that you had a yard to take nice photos in. Hoseok and you had both been working hard on the weekends and evenings to transform the yard from the overgrown mess it had been into something nice. Nothing too amazing or expensive as it wasn’t your own house but nice enough that it made from some pretty aesthetic photos.

Placing a final bottle of moisturiser in your basket, you smile at Hoseok and hold it up proudly. He just looks at you in amusement for a second before smiling back.

“All done! We can go to pay now.” While you pay for all your new stuff, he goes and waits outside for you. Which you discover means he intently window shops at the video game store, getting that look on his face when he wants to do something.

Feeling that your bladder is a little too full right now, you glance over to where the public restrooms are and move over to Hoseok. “You can go in if you want, I’m going to the restroom so I’ll be back in a few minutes.”

He takes your bag for you like the gentleman he is before disappearing inside, immediately making a beeline for the Playstation 4 section. You have a feeling he might be about to drop some money given how interested he’d been in some of the new games that have been released in the last few months.

Any thoughts of games are wiped from your mind very quickly though when you’re on the toilet. The sight of red staining your underwear has your eyes widening in horror as you realise that your period has decided to make an early appearance. For a moment you simply stare, brow creasing before you reach for your bag and grab your phone.

The period app you use says that you shouldn’t have started for another four days and you curse your body for doing whatever it likes. Scowling at the stain, you attempt to clean it before sighing in defeat, acknowledging that at least you were wearing black jeans today.

Another rummage in your bag causes you to find another problem, this one sending ice water running through your veins. Grabbing it and placing it onto your knees, you visually scan through every space and almost pull out the entire contents before letting out a small sound of despair.

You had no tampons.

Cursing to yourself quietly, you finish up and make do with an almost ridiculously large amount of toilet paper. Rushing out, you wash your hands before moving over to the machine that always had condoms, sanitary pads and tampons.

Only to see the ‘sold out’ sign on both the buttons you need. Groaning quietly, you do a little dance of frustration as you realise there are not even any other women in the restroom for you to ask. Not that you would. As if your social anxiety would allow for that!

So instead you have to slink outside and into the game shop, lip jutting out in a slight pout as you become hyper-aware of yourself. Can other people smell the blood? What if you leak through all the toilet paper and it does somehow show through your jeans?! What if you leak through onto a chair!

Hoseok wanted to get something to eat after this and you were dreading having to sit there for ages. Playing with your fingers nervously, you move over to where he’s crouched in front of the PS4 stand. He already has two game cases in his hand and is reading the back of another one, your bag of goodies on the floor between his feet.

Glancing up at you, he grins brightly before showing the cover of one of the cases he’s got.

“Look! The Spider-Man game is on sale! You want to play this, right?” Absentmindedly, you nod. The back of your mind takes in the fact that he’s also got Divinity: Original Sin 2 in his ‘buy’ hand and the other case he’s considering is the Doom remake. You wish that you could let him browse more but the drug store wasn’t close by and you didn’t want to just abandon him suddenly.

Still, the thought of what was going on down below was overwhelming and you found yourself shaking his shoulder slightly.

“Hey, are you done? Can we go?” Reaching down, you take your bag back and stand back as he rises, the crease between his brows letting you know he’s a little confused as to why you’re suddenly rushing him. He knows full well that there’s nothing important you need to do.

Still, though, he doesn’t question it and instead nods slowly. While he goes and pays for the games he’s buying, you go to wait by the entrance. Wrapping your arms around your waist, you realise that the low ache in your back that you’d had for a day or so was one of those early symptoms you got of your period.

Only you hadn’t thought anything about it. Not when you’d spent a few hours last night stood up. You’d just thought it was because you’d done a lot of work in the yard combined with the concert. Apparently not.

You’re pretty much already walking in the direction of the drug store by the time Hoseok comes out, causing him to have to jog to catch up with you. All you can think about is whether or not walking faster or slower would make things worse.

“Woah, hey, where are we going?” Hoseok asks, matching his speed to yours. You’re just thankful that there are not too many people out shopping today because it would only increase your stress levels if there was a big queue that you had to wait in or something.

“Just, to this store.” Admittedly, you’re not being very open and honest right now. But you’re embarrassed. Hoseok is fully aware of your periods and that they’re very much a thing that happens. They’d become a little more irregular recently as you’d had a copper IUD put in around a month before moving in with him.

Nothing drastic or anything, but then again they were also sometimes longer and a little heavier than you were used to when you were on the pill. It wasn’t exactly something you enjoyed talking about with anyone though; Soyeon and Chungha were pretty open about this kind of stuff but you had always mostly stayed quiet whenever they talked about it.

Which was silly. They were women who fully understood what you were going through and Hoseok understood that it was a monthly event. So it wasn’t like he’d be shocked to find out or anything. If anything, you’d probably done a bit of a bad job in explaining some things to him as you’d always got too shy whenever he’d asked things.

That was bad, you were well aware. But you’d only really got comfortable talking about sexual things with him. You knew that there were guys who thought it was gross that women bled for a week or so. Hoseok had never made those kinds of comments, but still. You were a work in progress.

“We’ve already been in here, why are you dragging me like Jason Voorhees is running after us with a knife?” He whines when you enter the store. You’re not surprised he’s confused because he’s right, you had come in here earlier and picked up what you needed. Still, though, he follows close by.

“I thought we didn’t need anything else.” Comes from him next, his lip pouting and you get the sense that he wanted to spend more time in the game store. A rush of guilt and shame washes over you, causing you to grip his hand even tighter as you shuffle awkwardly in place for a moment.

Finally in the store though, you realise just how silly you’re being with him. It’s not like he’s going to get outraged or upset. And you’re sure he’d have been much more willing to come along if he hadn’t been dragged along half the street with no idea what was happening.

Leaning into him, you cough slightly before swallowing as you feel yourself go hot with anxiety.

“My period started.” You whisper, keeping the words quiet enough so that he can hear them without having anyone else overhear. Though the rational part of your mind knew that you shouldn’t give a flying fuck what anyone else thought. It was a natural, bodily function and all that.

Your mind has never quite done things rationally though.

Hoseok has heard you though, you can tell by the way his head tilts to the side ever so slightly. But his expression is blank for a moment before his brow creases in obvious confusion, lips pursing as he contemplates what you’ve just told him.

“Okay...so why are we here?” Annnnd there it is. That famed male obliviousness to female problems. You couldn’t get annoyed at him though, not when he was good with you on everything else. He was cute.

“It’s early? And I have nothing to use. So I need to buy some.” His face changes immediately when he understands finally, mouth curving into an ‘o’ shape as he lets out a noise of recognition. It then contorts into worry for you, his eyes glancing down to your crotch area with wide eyes.

“Wait, so that means you’re...just…” He creates a rushing gesture with his hands, imitating a waterfall as he makes a ‘whoosh’ noise with his mouth. It’s a little too loud for your liking and you hiss at him, poking at his stomach before quickly pulling him over to the menstrual health aisle.

“I’ve used some toilet paper but it probably won’t last. It’s come on pretty hard and fast today. Please don’t laugh.” You beg him and his face sobers immediately, eyes darting over your own as he takes in your distressed appearance. Licking at his lips, he inhales deeply before nodding.

“Okay, you use tampons, right? So like...which ones? You never keep the box.” Automatically he starts to look over all the boxes of tampons; staring at the brands, types and absorption levels like he’s reading signs in Mandarin or something. It makes you want to laugh, despite the situation.

You appreciate his eagerness to help though, even when he points at random boxes with absolutely zero knowledge of what it was.

“What’s the difference in the brands? Is there a difference? Or is it like...when you buy those store brand biscuits and realise they taste the same as the branded biscuits only to find out that they’re made in the same factory and just relabelled?” That makes you snort with amusement, particularly as he’s now holding up a box of Tampax and a store brand to try and see the difference.

He’s not finished yet though, and even though you still feel the urgency to just grab some and run, you can’t help but let him entertain you. Because that’s what he’s doing. You’re not oblivious, you’ve realised over time that if you’re feeling anxious or uncomfortable or shy, Hoseok will often use humour to distract you away from your negativity.

It’s nice, which is why you let him carry on for a minute or so more.

“What are the drops for? And what’s the difference between regular and super? I mean, I think you’re pretty super but is this like...super big or something? Wait, is this plastic?! How does it absorb blood if it’s plastic?” Rolling your eyes at him, you bite your lip to stop the laughter that wants to escape before reaching past him to grab the box you usually buy.

Lifting it, you decide for a quick crash course in tampons. As your boyfriend, you never know when you might need him to run out to the store for some and the last thing you need is him bringing the entirely wrong type back.

“I use Tampax, purely cos it’s just the brand I’ve always used and I’m familiar with it. Super and regular are like the absorption so you’d use a super for the first few days when a period is heaviest. Hence why I’m getting these. The drops are the absorption rating too basically and it’s not plastic, that’s just the applicator that makes it easier to insert.” You say it all pretty quickly, but quietly enough that only he hears.

Not that there’s any need, the store is loud enough that your conversation can’t be overheard and on top of that, there’s no one in this aisle anyway. But Hoseok nods thoughtfully, scanning the front of the box carefully.

“When we get home, I think I need a crash course in periods because I’m feeling pretty useless and dumb right now.” Laughing, you lean up to kiss his cheek quickly before heading in the direction of the cashiers.

“We can do that for you. It’s better to be educated after all. This is where I find out that you have this bizarre knowledge that is unbelievably wrong and I cringe.” Hoseok doesn’t answer back to that, causing you to look back and chuckle at his meek shrug and wince.

“What can I say? I’ve never had a girlfriend long enough to learn and education in high school was terrible. I’m not even gonna try to defend myself.” Humming lightly, you grin at him as you pay before heading out of the store. Looking in the direction of the toilets, you twist your lips as you consider your options.

“You want to eat at that place, right?” You ask, nodding your head towards the Japanese place that was down the opposite end of the street. Hoseok looks that way and nods, confirming his desire to you. Already you can feel your stomach rumble as you imagine the delicious food.

“Okay, we’ll just go there and I’ll go straight to the restroom in there. Come on.” Reaching you, you take his hand and smile up at him, your walk not so hurried now compared to before. Not that you aren’t completely aware of the fact that you’re free bleeding from your vagina right now, but walking faster might just aggravate it more.

You had what you needed, so now you could relax a little more.

“Why are there so many steps in this? Don’t you get bored?” Hoseok mumbles, his words a little slurred due to the fact you’re rubbing serum into his cheeks. He’s already been here for ages in the bathroom as you’d used a cleanser to clean his face before exfoliating and then using toner on some cotton pads.

You could tell that he was amused by the whole situation, even though he’d seen you do this many times before. But it was different experiencing it for himself you supposed. Still, he looked so adorable and you cooed to him, squishing his cheeks even more in amusement.

“No. It’s relaxing. You’re supposed to relax.” That makes him scowl, the expression not nearly as intense as he was going for given you’ve got his lips in the cutest pout. Still, you’re finished with that part so you let him go, laughing as he runs his fingers over his skin.

“I’m not relaxed. More...manhandled.” Scoffing, you roll your eyes as you get to work rubbing the serum you need into your skin, focusing on your eyes. The dark circles beneath them were far too...well dark for your liking.

“Okay, how’s your skin lately? Dry? Oily?” Frowning at you, he twists his lips as he considers your question. He’s been taking better care of his skin than he had been before dating you, but you knew that he still didn’t care that much. Surprisingly though, he has an answer for you.

“Dry?” Nodding to yourself, you reach through your box of face masks and pull out a moisturising one. Handing it over to him, you take your own and rip it open, pulling out the mask and carefully putting it on. Hoseok watches you intently before opening up his mask, his face immediately twisting into a cringe.

“Ewwww, oh my god. Why is it so slimy?!” He whines, holding it over the sink like it’s some monster that might kill him. With the mask on your face, you can’t laugh properly like you want to.

“Stop being a baby and put it on.” With a little more whining, he does so, lining it up and putting it onto his face. What follows is then complaints that it’s also cold and feels weird, causing you to roll your eyes at him once more as you help to smooth out any creases in it.

“Right, we’ve got to keep this on for twenty minutes so let’s go watch some Netflix,” Looking over him, you take in how he still manages to look handsome even with a white sheet mask on. “It’s not fair that you always look so good. Honestly.”

Hoseok just shrugs before licking his lips, his reaction immediate as he registers the foul taste. “Oh fuck me, what the fuck. This tastes fucking vile!”

“...you’re not meant to eat it, babe, they don’t make it for the taste.” He washes his hands in the sink to get rid of the remaining residue before following you out to the couch in the living room, Netflix still paused on the large television screen. Kasumi is curled up on her cat tree, fluffy body small as she sleeps quietly.

For around ten minutes, neither of you speak as you continue to watch Warrior Nun. It’s surprisingly got both your attention hooked, so you’re a little surprised when Hoseok suddenly speaks up and distracts you.

“Hey...I know this is a weird time to talk about this but after your whole period thing today it reminded me. So, I’ve been thinking lately. You definitely don’t want kids...right?” He looks at you and you get the impression he would raise his brow if he could. When you nod in response, he blows out a breath slowly.

“Okay...how would you feel if I said I wanted to get a vasectomy? I mean, I know you’ve said you don’t want kids but there’s always a chance that you might and a vasectomy is pretty final. Despite what people say.” Now it’s your for your expression to be mostly hidden by your face mask, your eyes widening until your eyelashes are uncomfortably touching the edges of the holes.

“You want that? I thought guys normally got all weirded out at that prospect. And I don’t want kids, ever. Full stop. Are you sure?” Of all the things you were going to be discussing tonight, you did not expect it to be this. It’s almost amusing that Hoseok has decided right now is the time for something so serious, when you both look so silly.

“I do. I just...I don’t want to risk a pregnancy and I know you’re scared of that too. Also, it’d put less stress on you, I know most birth control is usually aimed at women except for condoms and it’s a lot easier for me to get a vasectomy than for you to get anything done.” That makes you snort in acknowledgement, shifting on the couch until you pull your leg up and wrap your arms around it.

“Yeah, because god forbid a woman not want to fulfil her natural duty and pop out a kid, right?”

“I’ve been looking into it, I’m pretty sure I could get one. If not, I’ll just talk the doctor’s ear off until they let me. Because it’s gonna happen. It’s way easier and less stressful than anything you have to do.” His dual concern for not wanting to cause an accidental pregnancy that neither of you wanted along with not wanting the burden to fall too heavily on you warms you, causing you to reach out and grasp his hand tightly as you squeeze at it.

“Is it easy? Or quick?”

“Apparently. Some guys say it doesn’t hurt at all, others said it hurts. But...I’m pretty sure I want it. I just wanted to check with you that you’d be okay with the idea too. As I said, it’s final.” Hoseok smiles at you as best he can, causing you to shuffle a little closer to him. You’d like to rest your head against his shoulder but you’d just get it covered in face mask gunk.

“I mean, it’s your body. It doesn’t have anything to do with me.” Pointing this out to him, you look up and tilt your head, your statement almost a question.

It makes him sigh and focus on your hands, shifting them until he could interlink his fingers with your own. You let him do so, figuring he should probably be taking the lead in this conversation. It is about him after all.

“We’re in a relationship. A serious relationship and this decision would affect both of us. It’s cutting off the chance for biological kids, despite people saying you might be able to reverse it. I feel you should have a say too.” Nodding slowly, you hum lightly as you consider his words carefully.

“Well, if you want it then I’ll support you completely. I never want children so you don’t have to worry about that. It’s your decision, but I just want to make sure you think it over properly and do research, okay? Don’t go rushing into it.” That makes him snort in amusement.

“Meeps, if there’s one thing you should know by now; it’s that men do not take decisions regarding their dick and balls lightly. You can be damn sure I’m going to be 100% in my decision if I’m going to let someone come near my balls with a scalpel or somet.” The way he says this is so matter of fact that you can’t help but laugh, the sound not as big or bright as you’d like it to be given you still had your mask on.

“Man, I can’t believe I’m talking about someone knifing my balls while I’m sitting here looking like a dollar store Michael Myers.” Hoseok points at himself, his bemusement clearly obvious despite his poor Halloween costume and you giggle softly.

Reaching out, you run your fingers through his hair that’s currently being held back by a bandana and smile at him softly. “Come on, let’s go get these off and start looking human again.”

Hoseok follows you immediately, already peeling the face mask off and making casual comments about how the mask isn’t as slimy as it had once been. You take off your own and drop it into the small bin in the bathroom, making sure that he does the same.

“Okay, rub it in and pat it dry. Make sure you get the excess to go on your throat and stuff, it’s good for your skin there too.” Hoseok looks in the mirror, his face shining obscenely from the residue leftover and grimaces.

“Ew, this feels...gross,” One hand presses to his skin, rubbing it in and cringing. “Is this what it feels like when I cum on your face?”

The comment is so random that you pause for a moment, all thoughts disappearing as you comprehend what he’s just said. A glance at him makes you realise he’s being completely serious, his expression focused on rubbing his face as you’d told him. It’s moments like this that make you love him even more, the blasé comments he makes that are so funny and yet also x-rated.

“No...not really. That’s more...well it’s not all over, you know? And it’s thicker than this. And I don’t know why I’m explaining this to you. You know what your cum feels like.” A snort from him gives away his bemusement.

“Yeah, but I’ve never smeared it all over my face before.”

“Maybe you should. Experience it for yourself for once. It’s not all that good for you by the way, despite what people say. It has protein but it’s not enough to make it worthwhile or anything, so don’t think I’m going to be asking you for your special facials anytime soon.” Looking away from him, you grab the next item on your routine before looking at him with a smirk.

“Damn, there goes my plan to be self-sufficient. Could’ve made a whole organic spa thing out of it.”

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heuristicallyinclined · 4 years ago

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SPF Five Million or Whatever

Summary: Mspa Reader figures they need some sunlight and recruits a few friends to help them get it.

Rating: T for language

Notes: I haven't written any of the jades before and I really love them and tried my best to capture their dynamic. I really love imagining Mspa Reader's adventures between Friendsim and Pesterquest. I feel like the games were really just scratching the surface of their shenanigans.

(AO3)

You are pretty sure that people need about twenty minutes of sunlight a day to stay healthy.

Or at least that is what you think it is. You never really thought about it too much to be honest. Having spent a decent amount of time outside walking, you figured you were getting your daily dose in without much effort, and maybe you just didn’t realize how good you had it, not living on a planet that even passively was trying to kill you. Because right now, you know for a fact you’re getting the ideal amount of sunlight on Alternia, which in your personal experience is fucking ziltch.

You tried it once and learned pretty fast that what might leave you with a healthy glow on Earth, would leave you well done on Alternia, a disgusting state for any piece of meat to be in, let alone your body. So that was clearly an Earth exclusive recommendation.

Still, you think some sunlight would do you good.

Especially since you were starting to feel this constant exhaustion after a few months on Alternia. After ruling out your questionable diet and semi existent sleep schedule, you were left with the fact that you were likely getting a vitamin D deficiency.

Frankly, you have not survived your various trials and many tribulations here on Alternia to let rickets be what finally kills you. Absolutely not. No. You’re too proud to die in the lamest way possible on a planet with significantly more respectable and less preventable ways of dying.

This does mean you’ll have to face off with the Alternian sun, which really isn’t that much better on the lame death scale. Last time you got caught out during daylight, you got really lucky. You aren’t counting on a second time where a gorgeous cowgirl, alien Lassie, and a lot of dumb luck would happen to rescue you from your own poor life choices.

So this time, you were going to try to be smart about doing something this monumentally stupid. You were going to get water, a floppy hat, and some ice packs. Now you just had to not do this alone, especially when you knew someone who touted the merits of the buddy system.

Luckily, you also know a few people who could withstand the sun’s rays.

Finding out that jadeblood sun resistance was in fact a real thing and not just the latest in fucking with the local alien made this a whole lot easier and left you with a few options to consider. You figured Wanshi was too young to be kept up that late and that you’d rather not traumatize her if this went sideways. Bronya mentioned being busy with a new brood hatching and managing the herd of lusii they attracted to the caverns so that was a no go. Lanque would likely be otherwise occupied or at least claim to be and you’d rather him not see you like this if you could help it. That left you with Daraya, who you knew would be up and likely be down for some alien shenanigans. But most importantly, Lynera.

One massive check in her favor is she already had experience inconspicuously carrying your injured body through the caverns unnoticed by literally anyone else to a secondary location So discretion was clearly already a strong suit of hers. The context for how she even got that much experience in the first place is none of your business, especially now that you’re friends. And you’d say you two were actually pretty close after all the time you’ve spent hanging out with her in the caverns and going out on little cafe trips.

Really, she was the ideal candidate for this by every observable metric. Well, almost.

While she is loyal enough that you knew that she would help you hide a body if asked, she has also threatened enough people for perceived slights against you that she would very likely be the reason there was a corpse hanging around in the first place. So having Daraya be there too was probably a safe move.

Oh it’s all coming together now.

You were feeling really good about this. Your confidence in yourself, your friends, and your planning abilities carried you through two difficult conversations. One with a veneer of apathy trying to conceal some very real concern, the other incredibly loud and extremely worried, but you got through them and that’s what matters.

So here you are at the brooding caverns, tucked away inside the turn just before the mouth, clad in some cool guy shades from Cirava, a sun hat from Charun, some shorts from Remele, and a Xoloto brand tank top complete with strategic ripping that makes it basically impossible to wear anywhere in public without a layer underneath.

Your friends are right here with you. Lynera is alternating between pacing and fretting over the placement of your sun hat for the seventh time to really make sure your hair doesn’t ignite. You know it won’t and you told her it won’t, but you let her fuss. She just needs to do something with her hands to stay calm. You can at least let her have that with what you’re about to do. Daraya checks her palm husk again for the time as dawn steadily approaches. You take a deep breath in, psyching yourself up.

So you never actually figured out what the Alternian sun equivalent to twenty minutes of Earth sun is. But you think a minute should be enough to do it and not pass out. It feels about right. You have based this off of no math whatsoever, but you’ve done worse with less prep, so you’re not going to let some nerd shit stop you. Especially not now, when you hear Daraya sigh. You know that it’s show time.

You look at her to confirm as she pockets her device and you see some light begin to stretch into the cavern’s entrance. She looks at it too, frowning as it approaches.

“▲▲ try not to fry your pan ▼▼"

You give her a reassuring smile and run up through the mouth of the cave, and stop just past the entrance, arms up wide and outstretched, like you were doing the YMCA dance and lost rhythm just past the first letter, ready to receive that sunlight you so desperately craved. The sun hits your skin and there is a comfort in feeling’s its warmth after living in eternal night.

You really missed this.

...

Actually, you know what? No you don’t. Fuck this.

That “gentle warmth” quickly became a scorching blaze and to your credit, you made it a solid ten seconds under the full wrath of that relentless bitch they called a sun before you decided to quit while you were ahead and conscious. You dash back towards the entrance, uncomfortably aware of every step you take. Lynera stops nervously pacing and stiffens when you reenter the shade and runs towards you. Daraya is ready and quickly hands you a water bottle. You struggle to open the cap because of the condensation making the bottle slick and it exacerbates the painful tingle you’re feeling all over your hands. And your face. And your everything actually.

You continue struggling until you finally succeed in twisting the cap off, but your victory immediately proves to be a hollow one, as your tight grip on the bottle has water going everywhere.

God. Damn. It.

You’re vaguely cognisant of a screeching sound somewhere behind you, but you have more important concerns right now. By some absolute miracle, a decent amount of the water seems to have gotten on you and saturated your top, soothing the skin under it. You feel less like you’re on fire and more like you had marinated your entire body in icy-hot for a few hours before getting deep fried.

You’d like to believe that that is a much more manageable situation. Your skin can’t tell much of a difference though so you waste no time and pour the rest out all over your face like you were a champ who just scored the winning goal instead of a dipshit speedrunning skin cancer.

Daraya mercifully cracks a cold one with the boys and pours the contents of another water bottle on you like you were a plant she forgot to water. The cool sensation on your skin causes you to sigh in a relief that doesn’t last long, before you lose contact with the ground. Lynera has you thrown over her shoulder and starts quickly making her way back into the caverns to her respiteblock. The physical contact takes that previous painful tingle and absolutely fucking floors it, bringing you to a familiar world of pain that your ass was very content not revisiting. Daraya keeps pace behind the two of you with her arms crossed the face of someone who is totally not panicked.

You try to calm them, telling them you feel better already. Really, you mean it.

This just causes Lynera to speed up and Daraya to grimace down at you instead of giving you an actual response.

While, yes, you resent having flesh, you actually feel really awake right now.

Daraya narrows her eyes. “▲▲ you mean from the pain? ▼▼”

No. No. That's different. And way more familiar.

God. Despite looking like a freshly hatched octogenarian, Lynera can really book it.

She carries your limp, increasingly dizzy body with ease. You knew she was deceptively strong and fast first hand, based off of her being able to immediately able to knock you the fuck out and lug you back to her combination study block murder dungeon. Honestly, being able to do anything with an alien discreetly deserves commendation. Commendation up and out the wazoo.

You’re about to attempt to try to verbalize that thought, but just before the turn to get to Lynera's study block, she suddenly stops. She nervously glances between this hallway and another adjacent one one. Daraya almost bumps into her but stops herself just in time.

"▲▲▲ what are you doing? We said we were just going to put them in a spare recuperacoon ▼▼▼" Daraya whisper yells.

"They're a new color Daraya !!!" Lynera whisper yells to the point of negating the whisper part of the whisper yell and more just using a normal speaking volume with a hiss. “-they need !!! A medicull kit !!!”

Oh. You glance down at one of your dangling arms. That happened fast. In retrospect, you should have mentioned that was a thing that would potentially happen. How did you forget that?

“▲▲▲ and do what? A medicull kit could make them worse. We don’t know shit about aliens ▼▼▼”

“-!!! well how would you know all of their injuries were taken care of! that we didnt miss anything!”

“▲ they’re fine. We just, I don't fucking know? Rotate them in the slime? ▼”

“-like some sort of !!! rotisserie cluckbeast !!!” Lynera indignantly whisper shrieks.

"▲▲ No!▼▼" Daraya quickly defends. The way her eyes quickly glance to the side seems to imply that's kind of exactly what it's like.

Just like them rotisserie chickens.

The longer their arguing went on, the more uncomfortably aware you were getting about the fact that you had a body and Lynera's clothes felt like steel wool grating against your poor skin. That and describing what they were doing as “whisper arguing” was becoming more and more of a stretch as it went on and started to get louder. You were worried you were going to attract unwanted attention.

It is as soon as you have that thought, that a door opens, and you see an irritated Lanque groggily peek his head through to find the source of the commotion.

His face remains still at first, blinking tiredly as he takes in the fuckery and only opens the door wider when the other two turn at the sound of his door opening and he registers you slumped over Lynera’s shoulder with a single raised brow.

You smile and wave at him, despite how lightheaded her turn had you feeling, and Daraya quickly pulls your hand down and stands in front of you like there was nothing to see here. You let out a weak, “ow,” as she did, your flesh protesting at the touch. She glances back at you quickly, before exasperatedly turning to look back at Lanque with her arms crossed.

“▲▲ what? ▼▼”

He measuredly looks at the scene before him. Really taking in all of the bullshit before side eyeing Lynera.

“You threW the alien into broad daylight? EVen for you, that's crazy.” He almost sounds surprised, before smiling sweetly, “NoW Who’s going to tolerate you?”

Lynera sputters something, clearly offended, but Daraya cuts her off with a groan,

“▲ they literally need sunlight to live Lanque ▼”

His face twists. “Are they a fucking plant?”

“-no!!!" Lynera considers for a moment before yelling again just as loud. “-most likely not!!!”

He looks from your trio, to the small puddle of water forming under you, and glances back to the trail of water you apparently had dripping from you this whole time.

You know, you’re really starting to see the plant angle here.

“▲▲ look they just needed some stupid sunlight and we hung around to make sure they didn’t just get too cooked or whatever. What, are you going to tell Bronya on us? ▼▼" Daraya half mocks, half asks.

“No, of course not.” Lanque almost seems offended. “I don’t see any reason to inVolVe myself With you tWo Watching the alien give themselVes sun sickness.”

You ask no one in particular what sun sickness is.

“-can aliens get sun sickness???” Lynera asks with a newfound panic.

Lanque irritatedly replies, “HoW Would I knoW?”

You feel briefly dejected that no one answered. Until another thought crosses your mind. It wasn’t related to anything occurring at the moment, but it was weird enough that you don’t know how this was the first time you had ever really thought about it. Maybe the events of this morning were what it took for you to even be able consider this quandary.

Why do they say troll before a name? Like troll Will Smith? Doesn’t that imply there is another kind of WIll Smith? Like if they’re all trolls, why say troll? Oh shit, is that why they do it? Did you tell them about human Will Smith or would that be like human Whillh Smithh? Human Willhh Smyyth?

You rack your mind for other ways of making Will Smith a valid troll name, concentration evident on your face.

Lanque looks at you like you’re an idiot. “What the fuck are you talking about? You're just repeating the same name.”

The spelling? You narrow your eyes as you consider the spelling. It is the clearest thing in the world right now to you. It’s spelled different Lanque.

“I can’t hear how it’s spelled.”

Daraya’s eyes widen. "▲▲ They fried their fucking pan ▼▼ "

You still don’t know what sun sickness is, but you strongly suspect you may have it, especially since most of what happened afterwards was kind of a blur.

What you think you can remember is the sound of someone coming. Quick, determined footsteps that you couldn’t recognize, but Lynera clearly could as she stiffened first. She maybe said something about Bronya doing a curfew round? You think? Either way, it had everyone else on immediate edge and was enough for Lanque to decide this wasn’t worth staying awake for. He made a final comment and you heard a door shut, leaving your trio behind.

Daraya and Lynera exchanged words, finally remembering the “whisper” part of whisper yelling. They came to an agreement of some sort with Lynera nodding and heading to her studyblock and Daraya going off in the direction of what was probably Bronya.

Mentally, you are pressing F to pay your respects. Physically though, you register your orientation rapidly shifting. While you weren’t crazy about your position over Lynera's shoulder, what with her sweater vest grating against your torso and all, it turns out you enjoyed being moved out of it even less. The blood running away from your head had you feeling woozy in a whole new way.

To her credit, Lynera did not just immediately dunk you into the recuperacoon a la Space Jam like you’re sure she wanted to. She instead carefully lets you sink into it with a gentleness that starkly contrasted her worry. Normally, you would say that being put into a vat of slime is not an experience you would be looking forward to. Right now though, you’re loving it. It is an absolute godsend as it acts a cool balm against your skin.

Lynera continues and gingerly removes your shades and places them on an end table next to your sunhat. You were about to thank her and let her know she was in fact “a real one,” but you got cut off by her grabbing a handful of slime and smearing it on your face.

You sputter and instinctively try to move away, but you’re no match for her. She’s dealt with fussy grubs with sharp teeth for way too long to actually be deterred by your feeble efforts to resist. You don’t know how you’d rate the experience between, “children haphazardly covering you in slick grease paint” to “alien clay mask ensuring you don’t have enough skin to even entertain having clogged pores,” but you aren’t in a position to be opposed to it. It actually feels kinda nice when it’s in a smooth, even layer and not a huge fucking dollop on your face.

When she’s done, she wipes her hands while saying something to you. You don’t really register it, so you just kinda smile and nod. It’s your usual go to when you aren’t quite sure what is happening around you and it hasn’t led you too astray in the very many times you’ve done it. You’ll just ask her what she said in the evening.

Lynera seems pleased and starts moving to turn off the lights. Before she does, you thank her. She smiles at you, the corners of her eyes crinkling, and glances back at you as she goes, leaving you feeling warm inside and out for two extremely different reasons.

You settle down, trying to get cozy. You're not going to pretend you know much about sopor slime. You assumed it comes from a plant and haven't tried to confirm that little theory of yours because you need to believe that for your own sake. It's plant goo. From some kind of alien aloe vera or something. An extremely fleshy plant just ripe with goo for the taking. If you ever learn otherwise, no you didn't.

After you wake up and wipe off the slime, you find that you’ve healed surprisingly quickly. You’re still very tender to the touch, you find that out real fast, but your skin looks a lot less irritated than when you last saw it. This bit of good news and vitamin d that you assume you now have coursing through your veins that hopefully was not mostly used up on healing your skin, puts a little pep in your step as you get ready for the night. Before you exit the caverns, you feel a pang of hunger.

You can practically hear Bronya reminding you how breakfast is the most important meal of the day, so you walk into the meal block, figuring that no one would mind too much if you grabbed a breakfast bar or two before you left. Maybe you’ll even get lucky and find the ones that kind of taste like peanut butter and are crunchy for reasons you’d rather not identify. You aren’t alone when you enter. Lanque is there, sitting at a table. He looks up from his palm husk and eyes you.

“Did you change color?”

Yeah. Humans being exposed to sunlight makes them create a protective pigment so they're more able to be exposed to the sun.

“I’m fascinated.” he says, anything but. “So you're going to turn jade?”

No, more of a slightly darker version of what you are now.

He hums, now totally disinterested and looking back down at his chittr feed. Guess the limits of your rainbowdrinker like attributes have worn off on him.

Anyways, this just means that this will be easier next time you go out during the day.

That statement gives him pause. Lanque looks up from his palm husk, looking out before glancing at you dubiously.

"Next time?"

#hiveswap #hiveswap friendsim #Lynera Skalbi #Daraya Jonjet #Lanque Bombyx #Mspa Reader #This is just me having fun and getting real stupid enjoy #Can you tell I love Lynera?

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lesbiancarat · 4 years ago

Note

PREACH IT!! SAY IT LOUDER FOR TH3 PEOPLE IN THE BACK!! *stands up and claps*

Just your comment, please I want to tattoo that entire response on my forehead so people could understand some stuff fjshdhsh. I very much agree with everything you have said, like I do think the bighit deal was more so with the help of say with western connections (which again does NOT mean pledis could have done this without bighit. They clearly could but I saw a theory on a YouTube comment where someone said they focused on the core fanbase aka in Korea which is their main market and it paid off imo) from helping with buisness side of things like we do have merch to buy directly (which I have my opinion on some merch ideas like why the fudge is bighit selling us water!? Bro you thought that worked with bts doesn't mean it will with seventeen) which wasn't common in the past or being able to film concerts with ease during the pandemic. Bighit clearly acknowledges that seventeen is a monster group in their own right I mean as you said, they break records and are 2nd behind bighits own group. They are EXTEMELY big in Japan. They are their own song makers, bang pd confirmed this when pleids was first announced in a press video so the fact people brush all of their achievements and statements because why, their streaming numbers are low?

And oohh such an interesting point as well! Very much i think the current mindset of kpop fans (or at least some) is that streaming is what equals success which to some degree, yes but as you said, many ignore the casual side of listening. People that find the song due to it being viral for whatever reason, a fancam getting popular like in the cass of hani from exid or whatever reason. Dwc is a great example and I saw those comments under their recent performance of that song and it makes me proud that the boys have a song like that. That it has its own "fanbase" quote on quote with how well loved that song simply is and well known. You don't have to have fans doing crazy streaming to be considered "popular", I mean I could give more examples but I don't wanna make this too long nor cause unwanted fandrama lol. Those casual listeners are extremely important and powerful I mean brave girls is a great recent example of that I think! It very much does seem like that when looking at the views, its mainly the core fanbase which isn't bad nor should we feel bad for not having crazy numbers. They seem more organic if that makes sense? Plus I agree, we can stream and can explain how it works, clearing up confusion about it like no emojis don't take down views and yes youtube does take away views but that is due to it making sure it isn't bots only viewing the video. Explaining that streaming should be done with a chill mindset and its ok if you don't stream. But hey, maybe we're too weird of fans to think like this fjajdjajs.

But some few updates! Seventeen is back on Instagram, fully everyone is posting away. Makes me happy hehe m, a bit funny it took so long for them to comeback but am happy nonetheless. The interactions that seungkwan does makes me super soft. Seventeen are also back with doing proper promotions so yay (also pledis is S Wording people over the mingyu issue finally so bless). As for me on the personal side of things. I have OFFICIALLY finished that video game ^_^ it took me a while but I have finished it, my last goodbye was completed and am at ease so to speak? Lowkey am planning on beating all the trophies in the game cx also may I ask about your thoughts on the album? Favorite songs, have you bought the physical cd?

ok finally getting around to this lol!!

and yeah that's absolutely true, pledis focused on kr promotions/fanbase first and foremost (and then expanded to Japan and is now looking toward the US/western promos in general). which i agree was a good thing. i think some companies get too greedy with wanting a group to be ~internationally famous~ that they ignore their Korean fanbase a bit too much and I've seen groups that have failed bc of it, so I'm glad that didn't happen w SVT

and yeah in terms of merch I'm genuinely grateful as an american that for this cb at least there was a US distributor which made things super convenient but wtf is going on w hybes merch those water bottles are not it TT it just sucks to see bc it's clear that at least as far as merch goes hybe doesn't have an interest in like. doing market research to figure out what carats want. which is funny bc they don't even have to start from scratch they could literally just ask pledis?? and tbh what's sad is i don't think hybe is like. purposefully trying to sabotage SVTs merch from my limited perspective i get the feeling they treat all their groups merch like that :( but since us carats have seen in the past what kind of merch we're capable of getting it's disappointing to see such a downgrade. and like tbf pledis's merch decisions were never perfect like that time they tried to sell replicas of the SVT rings and carats were rightfully pissed bc those are something the members earned, not something to be bought. and i also don't think hybe never has or never will make good merch, I'm sure they're fully capable of it. but it just seems obvious that they've put WAY less if any effort into understanding both the market (ie carats) and seventeens brand compared to pledis so like of course most carats aren't gonna like it :/ i really hope they step up their game and do better research or bring ppl onto the team who better understand svt's brand

and yeah i very much agree with everything u said about streaming! tbh i think this mindset isn't as uncommon as you might think, I've actually met a fair number of kpop fans who are critical of streaming culture but as u know there also are a lot of ppl who are really into it and those ppl tend to have the loudest voices. and unfortunately part of streaming culture is that if you question the methods or don't participate you must be a bad fan or secretly an anti or something ridiculous like that. so ppl who aren't into streaming culture end up learning to not be too vocal about it bc of how bad the backlash can be

yes! I'm glad to see insta line (+ now dk!!) active again. i still wonder why pledis made them stop using their ind instas, like I know all the theories people have as to why but honestly none that I've seen seem to fully make sense. it will probably be one of those things where we'll just never know the full story. but i digress!! regardless of the reason I'm just glad to have them back after all this time ^^

congrats on finishing the game! I'm glad it was able to help you work through your grief a bit and that you feel more at ease now ;-; and good luck with the rest of the trophies if you end up trying to get them!

as always I'm answering this a bit late so you may have seen already but i did get the physical album! it was a birthday gift so i only got it the other day, but according to my mom it arrived almost immediately after the album was released so as i said before, I'm very grateful for the US shop this time around ;-; as for the songs usually it's easy for me to pick one or two favorites but this time around it's genuinely a 4-way tie between heavens cloud and all the unit songs TT (i also love anyone and RTL, they're just slightly lower on the list in terms of preference if u get what i mean). i really hope some time in the future we get some kind of performance or special video or something for heavens cloud, since so many carats and the members themselves seem to really love it. i also think it's a song that brings up such beautiful imagery that it would be a shame if it never got any type of visual representation, you know? I'm also really curious to see a performance of wave, since iirc the members said the choreo is a lot more laid back/different from other perf unit choreos?? + that song also evokes such great imagery for me that like... makes feel like it needs some kind of movement so I'm just itching to see a performance. kind of like... even if i didn't know it was a perf unit song i would think it would be great to choreograph to if that makes any sense dhfkf. but yeah overall i think it's just a really solid album, as expected from summerteen ^^

#melia.ask #📖 anon #long post

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handeaux · 4 years ago

Text

Green Beer Came Later: Cincinnati’s Original, Old-Time, Irish Saloons

So ubiquitous are the photographs of mustachioed men, feet up on the brass rail, plug hats screwed firmly upon their noggins, that you might be forgiven if you concluded that all Queen City saloons were identical. This is not the case.

For evidence, let us turn to a meeting of the General Protective Association of Saloon-Keepers convened on Tuesday, 24 April 1883, to discuss a new state law taxing dispensaries of alcoholic potations. Although the meeting convened at a German hall, the president, J.J. Abbihl, introduced the agenda in English. According to the next day’s Commercial Tribune:

“As Mr. Abbihl spoke in the English language, Mr. Albert Springer made a motion that the German language be used in the discussion, but it was agreed to make the explanations in English on account of the importance of the meeting.”

Although the German beer garden holds a sacred place in the gilded memories of Cincinnati, a fair number of local pubs were helmed by Irish and American barkeeps. Any discussion of group meetings involving saloon keepers is clear to distinguish between “German saloon keepers” and “American and Irish saloon keepers.” (Of course, in their segregated neighborhoods, there were also Black saloon-keepers, but they were not allowed to join the protective associations.)

In general, the Irish saloons hewed closer to the river, and you can see this among the watering holes listed in the city directories. You find O’Brien’s at Third & Ludlow, O’Herron’s at Plum & Ann, McCoy’s on Front Street, McSweeney’s at the southern end of John and Connor’s way down on Central.

While the Germans colonized Over-the-Rhine, that was not always the case. The WPA Guide to Cincinnati relates that O’Bryonville, with its Irish namesake but early nickname as “Dutchtown,” accommodated Germans and Irish in (not always happy) comity:

“Thenceforth the name Dutchtown also was applied to the community, and many arguments were started over the bars between Irish and German customers who were constantly striving for social supremacy in the little community.”

This distinction was underlined in 1877 when saloon-keepers throughout the city gathered to pressure Cincinnati’s brewers into maintaining standard prices. Throughout Cincinnati, you paid 5 cents for a tall glass of beer, except in a few disreputable dives where suds were dispensed at two glasses for a nickel. The saloon-keepers realized that there was only one way the dives could afford two beers at that price – some brewery was selling stock at a discount. In those confrontations, the German saloonists met at one location and the Irish and American barkeeps met at another. Although they endorsed the viewpoint of the German proprietors, the Irish and Americans elected their own delegation to confront the brewers.

It is clear, from newspaper coverage that the menus differed between German saloons and American and Irish saloons. William C. Smith, in his wonderful little book, “Queen City Yesterdays: Sketches of Cincinnati In The Eighties,” makes a distinction between the beer-centered German establishments and the Irish and America saloons that purveyed mostly the harder stuff. Smith avers there ought to be a strict differentiation between beer saloons and what he calls “boozing kens.” His description offers a physiological excuse for Irish and American drinking patterns:

“On a shelf next to the wall various brands of liquor were in evidence, some labeled and others in plain bottles, the quality of the latter known only to God and the proprietor. These emporiums were patronized by the Irish and American inhabitants who believed their stomachs to be lined with a substance that beer might corrode, whereas whiskey apparently acted only as a preservative and polishing agent.”

That distinction is fortified by a joke that, according to the Cincinnati Enquirer [23 September 1917], was so old it caused Cain to slay Abel:

“An Irish saloon keeper hired a new bartender. A man came in and got a drink of whisky and then said: ‘I’ll pay for this Saturday. My name is Murphy. The boss knows me.’

“’Wait and I’ll ask the boss,’ said the bartender. ‘Oh. boss,’ yelled the bartender up the stairs. ‘Is Murphy good for a drink?’

“’Has he had it?’ asked the boss.

“’He has,’ replied the bartender.

“’He is,’ replied the boss.”

It is not the case that all Irish and American saloons sold whiskey exclusively. Perhaps the premier Irish saloon in Cincinnati was Andy Gilligan’s Café on Vine Street directly opposite the Enquirer building between Sixth and Seventh streets. For nearly thirty years, Gilligan was famous for his luxurious beard, extending from his chin to his belt buckle. On warm days he was a living Vine Street landmark, basking in the afternoon sun as he stood outside his café enjoying a good 15-cent cigar. Gilligan ran book on local prizefights, but the cops usually looked the other way. He was known as an easy touch for actors down on their luck and a frequent host to heavy-weight champ (and prodigious drinker) John L. Sullivan. Despite his largesse, Gilligan left an estate worth a respectable $75,000 in 1905 dollars. Decades after his death, the Cincinnati Post printed a remembrance:

“Do you remember when no St. Patrick’s Day was complete without a peek at Colonel Andy Gilligan and his long whiskers resting on a great green sash in the Hibernians’ annual March 17 parade?”

During World War I, as Prohibition loomed, evidence accumulated that all of Cincinnati’s saloon-keepers were in the same, sinking, boat. As anti-German hysteria swept the city, nationalist firebrands were quick to point out Irish saloons catering to a German clientele. According to the Cincinnati Post [14 September 1917]:

“James J. Dolan runs a saloon at Richmond-st. and Central-av., which he calls ‘Zum Guten Happen.’ Now that German has nearly been put out of the schools, somebody, no doubt, will start a movement to put it out of Irish saloons.”

A similar situation obtained at an Oakley saloon managed by Patrick J. McHugh, called “Auf Wiedersehen.”

No discussion of Irish saloons can conclude without a mention of green beer. Now, before 1917, “green beer” meant improperly aged suds. A 1908 Wiedemann advertisement advised against drinking green beer because “it has practically no flavor and will cause biliousness.”

As for the annual emerald-hued St. Patrick’s Day quaff, blame the Elks. In 1917, in honor of the patron saint of Ireland, Cincinnati’s Elks lodges consumed green beer in abundant quantities. According to the Cincinnati Post, the verdant libation was concocted by a German brewer.

#cincinnati irish #irish saloons #andy gilligan #cincinnati saloons

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rosethornewrites · 3 years ago

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Wednesday’s T and G reading

I’ve reached page 1 of my to-read list on AO3. Once I’m done with this page, I’ll be going back to page 58 to repeat the backward-reading process, this time with all fics under 5k words. So future lists may be smaller.

Finished:

Tumblr:

LQR redemption for the creepy!JFM prompt, by @angstymdzsthoughts

Teen:

bunnies, by wearing_tearing

“Lan Zhan, Lan Zhan, the papers will still be here in a few hours,” Wei Ying says and brushes a soft kiss to the hinge of Lan Wangji’s jaw. “Come spend time with your husband, Lan Er-gege. I miss you.”

Lan Wangji rarely finds within himself the strength to deny Wei Ying.

recovery, by wearing_tearing (third in a series)

The brand on Lan Wangji’s chest does not hurt anymore.

wherever the chaos is, by wearing_tearing (fourth in a series)

“But, Teacher Wei—”

“I believe in you! If you really need my help, I’ll come down from the tree, I promise.”

Lan Wangji does not regret his decision to let Wei Ying teach classes in the Cloud Recesses.

emperor’s smile, by wearing_tearing (fifth in a series)

“What are the conditions?” he asks, going back to the point. If he does not know the conditions, he will miss Wei Ying’s kisses.

That’s unacceptable.

Lan Wangji knows he does not have to, but he does not stop himself from grabbing a cup, filling it to the brim with Emperor’s Smile, and gulping it all down.

My Brother's Keeper - Vinegar, by ArchiveWriter (second in a series)

Jiang Cheng is angry and not quite sure what to do with it, so he as usual directs it at Wei Ying (for being stupid and crazy) and Lan Wangji (for being a stuck-up arrogant self-important snooty... well, the list is long, but mainly for being possessive of Wei Ying. Watching them from afar allows for silent fuming. Not to be taken too seriously - some Jiang Cheng soul-searching bound to result in self-conflict. Image a fly in a glass with no lid and still banging against all the glass walls... This is set post-canon, post 'Love Song', pre 'My Brother's Keeper - Most Treasured' and elaborates on what went on in Jiang Cheng's head when watching WWX and LWJ in the markets with them being oblivious. I had fun cramming as many adjectives as I could think of into this, so it's probably 'purple prose' :-) This might be a bit more light-hearted but I still can't see WWX and Jiang Cheng reconcile.

Though the Good and the Bad, by TheKrystalSakura

Wei Wuxian can’t sleep because intrusive thoughts keep plaguing his mind after all these years. Lan Wangji is there to listen to everything his husband has kept bottled up.

Right of First Approval, by AerinD

You know how "based on a true story"...isn't really? Five hundred years later, Jiang Cheng hates that phrase.

under the starlit sky, by b_ofdale

There have always been people who wanted to hurt him, learn from him, steal from him. . . but Lan Wangji?

Lan Wangji has only ever wanted to love him.

Practical Lessons in the Backhills, by Eliza (third in a series)

The Jiang motto is “Attempt the Impossible” but Wei Wuxian’s personal one is closer to “You don’t know until you try.”

Love Me Over Sunrise Tea, by Eliza (fourth in a series)

On the days they aren't on morning watch, Sizhui makes tea. Jingyi doesn't really like tea.

But for the World to See, by Eliza (fifth in a series)

Lan Wangji can't keep his hands off of Wei Ying.

Every Good Boy’s Dream, by Eliza (sixth in a series)

Temptation has never been a problem for Lan Xichen; he’s been giving in to it for years.

We Blossom in the Water, by Eliza (seventh in a series)

Jiang Yanli basks in the Yunmeng sun, her husband’s love, and a moment of freedom.

A Good Idea at the Time, by Eliza (eighth in a series)

Not every bad decision can be blamed on blood loss, but that doesn’t stop Wei Wuxian from trying.

Grief and Blame, Interwoven, by donutsweeper

Wangji's punishment was supposed to be severe, not fatal.

But since it was, Xichen needed to find a way to change that.

things that go honk in the night, by worldoshaking

Jin Ling and Lan Jingyi investigate a fearsome beast that has been terrorising the villages nearby. No one is quite sure what it looks like, but people live in fear of the sound of its honk and the patter of its webbed feet.

greens, by silverclaw

Wei Ying’s plants have been flourishing ever since Lan Zhan moved into the apartment next door. This causes more misunderstandings than one might expect.

The one I like…is you., by Liebing

The one I like has long dark hair, and a perfect smile, he is truly the handsomest Lan!” Wei Ying announced with his usual levels of endless enthusiasm.

Lan Zhan's shoulders dropped. That description had to be his brother. So Wei Ying liked his brother. He tried to ignore the heavy disappointed feeling as it washed over him. As much as he tried to ignore Wei Ying, he had to admit that the boy was irreversibly etched into his heart but it seemed the feeling wasn’t mutual.

someone i could save, by yuer (vintageblueskies)

Lan Wangji has nightmares of Wei Wuxian falling. It gets worse before it gets better.

Encounter - The Broad River, by ArchiveWriter (second in a series)

A meandering study of Lan Zhan's and Wen Yuan’s bond as Elder / Younger Brother during the years of LWJ’s grieving for WWX.

General:

family, by wearing_tearing (sixth in a series)

The warm bubble of happiness inside of Lan Wangji’s chest expands. The people he loves most in the world—his family—are here, around him, and even the day’s exhaustion could not dampen the joy he feels.

After an exhausting day, Lan Wangji has dinner with his family.

A Letter, Addressed to Sect Leader Jiang of Lotus Pier, by darth_meg

Jiang Cheng,

Please don't throw this away when you see who it’s from. There are many things I want to say, but I know I talk too much, so I think it’s best to write as few words as I can. I’ve rewritten this letter many times, crossing out what isn’t completely necessary. I hope you believe me.

Or, Wei Wuxian writes one letter to his brother.

Remedy, by abbymyg

Lan Wangji has been vomiting and with a fever all night, and Wei Wuxian hadn't slept at all.

Lan Qiren calls the doctor to treat his nephew and enters the Jingshi for the first time in years.

Where you ought to be, by Lucky_Moonly (second in a series)

Lans were Ravenclaws.

Which was why Lan Wangji wasn’t as stressed as the other first years as he awaited his sorting in one corner of the Great Hall.

Talk to Me, by MillenarianHappinessTheorem

Lan Huan hasn't spoken to his brother in three weeks. Maybe Jiang Cheng can give him some much-needed relationship advice.

dog days, by silversshadow (second in a series)

Yu ZiYuan will not allow weakness to hold back the Yunmeng Jiang sect.

Jiang Chengs dogs do not leave the Lotus Pier.

i need someone, by aurora_chiroptera

Jiang Cheng is worried about his brother. He thinks if Wei Wuxian marries someone respected from another sect, that he will be safer.

Wei Wuxian is not so sure.

From the prompt: “No one’s going to hurt you.”

Music Jams..., by Ladycroft4evr (third in a series)

It's a musical day at Cloud Recesses... we open with a WangXian music jam, followed by some family bonding over music for Wei WuXian and Sizhui... let's join Lan WangJi and enjoy a leisurely evening with their little family ❤

blinding, by acoostic

Lan Wangji grew up around snow. His hometown of Gusu was up north in the mountains.

The same can not be said of Wei Wuxian, who grew up in Lotus Pier, where the lakes and rivers kept the climate humid and relatively warm year round.

And you'll still be by my side, by hamlets_ghost (fourth in a series)

Nie Mingjue meets the young Lan Clan heir.

He also gets stuck in a tree.

Where His Heart Resides, by Preludian_Staves

He realizes belatedly two months after his marriage that his heart has finally found itself a new home.

Unfinished:

Rated T:

Another Letter, Addressed to Sect Leader Jiang of Lotus Pier, by darth_meg (second in a series)

Sect Leader Jiang,

I write to inform you of my intention to take Wei Ying as my husband and cultivation partner.

Or, Lan Wangji invites Jiang Cheng to discuss something.

The Red Ribbon, by NoMore_17

What if Mo XuanYu sacrifices his soul out of love instead of revenge?

#the untamed #untamed fanfiction #chen qing ling #mo dao zu shi #mdzs #cql

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ubernoxa · 4 years ago

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The Dare: A Guns N’ Roses Fanficiton

Chapter 36: An Important Minor Detail

Masterlist

Pairing: Duff Mckagan/OC

Story Summary: A stupid harmless dare, that’s all it was supposed to be. It was supposed to be something they would do, and never revisit. For Delilah, little did she know that visiting the strip wasn’t going to be a one time thing when she made the choice to accept the dare. Life is full of choices. Some choices can mean absolutely nothing, while others can change your entire world. Delilah had heard many rumors about the Sunset Strip or Devil’s Strip. Teenagers would whisper stories about how the Devil walks the streets of the strips without a care in the world. It was known as a place untouched by God. After years of hearing rumors about the Devil’s Strip, Delilah wants to see it for herself. Thus a Dare was born.

Chapter Summary: One of the many downsides of going to a large people is that you might know the ones there. Even if you wished you didn’t know them

Taglist: @gingerspicetalks @str4nge-haze @dustnbones @queen-crue

The moment that Duff had finished his show, and he had his arm wrapped around Del’s waist. It might sound corny, but he could take his eyes off of her the entire show. Granted she looked amazing in skin tight pants paired with a shirt that he assumed she borrowed from one of her roommates, but it was her dancing or more of teasing she was doing while he performed.

“Nice headscarf,” Duff whispered in Del’s ear as they followed the rest of the band to the bar.

“Thanks, this Duff guy had it on the floor of his room, so I decided to do the poor thing justice and wear it,” Del giggled at her own comment, and Duff smiled at the giggling girl.She wore it just like he had countless times around her.

When Del first started drinking, he wondered what kind of drunk she would be. Would she be the type to become mute? Would she become a mean drunk? A sad drunk? Quickly to his relief, Del was a giggly drunk who was a heavy flirt. Granted the flirting she did wasn’t the stereotypical flirting seen on the strip because at the end of the day Del is still Del, but Duff liked her weird sense of flirting.

Del quickly positioned herself on Duff’s lap once they were in the overcrowded truck that she had grown rather familiar with. She smiled even wider at the familiar scent of beer mixed with cigarette smoke, it smiled like home.

After a quick stop at the hell house to unload their equipment they were once again on the road.

“Where to?” Izzy asked, causing a small bicker fest between axl and Steven. Del passed a small piece of paper and leaned forward to talk to Izzy who was in the driver’s seat.

“Mags said there would be a party at this address, something about a good way to meet new people and network. Good way to meet new fans,” Del sent Izzy and Axl a warm smile as she talked, trying to mimic what Mags had done countless times to get her way.

“I don’t know Del,” Izzy slowly spoke, eyeing up Axl. Truth be told, Izzy didn't care if they went to the party or not. He recognized the address, and knew it was on the nicer side of town. Nicer side of town meant nicer booze. As Izzy looked at Axl, he expected to see some sort of annoyance in his scowl. It was no secret that Axl hated Mags, it was even less of a secret that Axl had requested for Mags to be kept as far away from the band as possible. Confusion filled Izzy, as he stared at the smile that was planted on Axl’s lips. If any other girl had asked to go to the party, Axl would have immediately said no, but this was Del who was batting her eyelashes and wearing the sweetest little smile. This was Del who had Axl wrapped around her little finger without even knowing.

“You want to go there? Do you want to get drunk Delly?” The brunette nodded earning a small laugh from Axl. Izzy couldn't help but roll his eyes at Axl using the nickname Duff called Del.

“Well, that side of town has the best booze,” Axl shrugged before handing the address back to Izzy.

“How do you guys feel about going on the North side? Apparently, there will be live music and free booze,”’ The cheers that erupted in the car quickly answered Axl’s question, and Izzy headed for the party.

Once Izzy got the truck back on the road, Duff pulled Del back, so she was no longer leaning forward and talking to axl.

“What was that about?” Del giggled as Duff began to pepper kisses into the crook of her neck.

“Hmm, nothing much. I just missed you,” Del giggled at his comment, unknowing of the glare the Duff was sending Axl. For a couple of seconds, Axl stopped smirking at the bassist and turned his attention elsewhere before talking with Izzy about their next gig.

Immaculate. That was the only word that came to mind when they pulled up the address.

“Holy shit, who is this guy?” Steven asked, trying to take in the mansion.

Their rusted truck was horribly out of place as they pulled up to the gate which automatically opened. He couldn't take his eyes off of the large fountain that was in the center of the front lawn. A naken women who was carved out of some sort of stone was holding a water jug. The fountain water was pouring out of the jug and cascaded around the woman’s body. The fountain must have cost more money than he has ever made, or stolen, in his entire life.

“Hey, Steven, there are probably nonrock naked women at the party, but you’re welcome to creepily stare at the rock woman all night. Personally, I would prefer to look at your girlfriend nake than that statue, but to each’s own,” Slash joked, earning a small chuckle from the drummer.

Earlier that evening, Stef had skipped the gig and gone to the party. Of course she was helping by keeping Mags away from the band like they had asked her too, but Stef also wanted some time away from Steven. She wanted some time to think things out.

“Well I am going to go find my girl,”Steven said as he bolted to the backyard like a lost puppy looking for its mom. Del couldn't help, but giggle at the notion. It was sweet of him, and she hoped that Duff would do the same if they were ever seperated.

Del felt Duff heartbeat quicken as they walked into the mansion where the party was in full swing. The place was huge and packed to the brim. She felt like a sardine in one of the tins you would buy at the store.

“Del, have you ever had fireball?” Slash asked, as they all stayed together and headed towards what they only assumed to be the kitchen. Del held onto Duff’s vest the entire way there, too afraid that she would lose him. She would have grabbed his shirt; however, he hadn't worn one which she had absolutely to problem with.

“No, why is it called fireball? Is that the shot you light on fire before taking?” By now they had made their way to the kitchen where they could all once again hear each other.

“No, it's cinnamon flavored,” Axl replied looking through the bottles that were on display. Holy shit, he couldn't remember the last time he had seen this many bottles at a party. He hated to admit it, but Mags always had good connections. To say he was more than curious to see Del’s reaction to the cinnamon liquor was an understatement, no doubt it would be adorable. Before the gig began, him and Slash were talking about which liquors Del had had before. Upon spotting Duff’s favorite brand of vodka, he pulled it from the selection and handed it to the blonde who gratefully accepted it. Axl smiled as he finally found the cinnamon liquor and grabbed some plastic cups that were on the table.

He couldn’t help, but laugh at Del who was currently giving Duff shit for drinking straight from the bottle. Apparently it wasn’t ‘classy’. Axl just shook his head and passed the girl a cup filled with about a shot worth of fireball.

“To getting trashed the classy way,” Axl clinked his plastic cup with Del’s earning a small giggle from the girl because there was clearly nothing classier than doing shots out of a red solo cup.

Del was able to drink about a fourth of the shot before the burn was too much making her cough. Axl once again rolled his eyes as Duff leaped to her side and rubbed her back making sure to not forget to send him a quick glare. As if he was the one who burned her throat. Del began to push Duff off of her, feeling the embarrassment of everyone looking at her.

“I'm fine Duffles,” Del sent the blonde a quick peck on the lips, instantly calming him down.

“Enough of this, I am going to grab a beer. Duff, can you help me find Mags and Stef?” Del added placing the cup down and grabbing one of the cans of beer that were under the table. She wasn’t picky. She was looking for anything that wouldn’t burn her throat.

Axl then swung his arm around Slash’s shoulder and the pair went off to socialize.

It didn't take long for Duff and Del to find Stef who was currently sitting on Steven’s lap. Del smiled at the pair as she walked closer to them.

“Hey! I was wondering if I was going to see you!” Stef cheered, running up and practically tackling Del to the ground. Duff managed to keep Del steady, keeping her from falling on her ass.

“Popcorn, why the hell are you wet?,” Steven only laughed at Duff’s question and pointed at Stef who was grinning from ear to ear.

“Hey..have you seen Mags?” Del asked, trying to get back on topic. To say that Del was a little concerned with Mags being at this party alone while pregnant was an understatement.

“Last I saw her, she went to go upstairs and powder her nose or some shit like that. Probably just needed to breathe. Come join us! You two have perfect timing because we were just talking about the band. Steven was telling me that you watched from the audience. How crazy was it?” Stef asked motioning towards Del to join them. The partygoers they were talking to turned towards Del, curiosity spread across their faces.

“It was insane!” Del smiled and looked up at Duff remembering how amazing the show was, how amazing Duff was.

Duff had begun to walk forward, taking Del’s comment as a cue that they would not be joining them; however, she began to take a few steps back.

“ I want to make sure that Mags is doing ok. Plus she was the one who invited me, and I don't wanna be rude,” Duff guided Del through the crowd of people. Duff made sure his arm was tightly wrapped around her waist. He had no intention of losing her, not now not ever.

Del let breath escape her once they walked up the marble steps. When they reached the top, Del was able to take in the scenery for the first time. A large chandeleur hung high above them, giving the illusion that it was floating in the air. The glass shimmered and reflections of the coral marble could be seen if you looked close enough.

“It looks like it is floating,” Duff pointed out to Del as they stood at the top of the stairs.

She just nodded at his response.

“Would you like me to buy you one?”

Del sent him a confused look before speaking, “No, we can barely afford food.”

“I meant when Guns N’ Roses makes it big,” Del melted as he spoke. She felt his arms lightly wrap around her, pulling her close.

“I would love one when you make it big,” Duff smiled at his words. He was glad that she knew they were going to make it big too. Del stood on her tiptoes and Duff bent over in realization that she wanted to kiss his forehead.

She lightly tugged his hand and wandered around the second floor. It was in the fourth room that Del heard a quiet sob from behind the door. She shot a quick look at Duff who nodded in understanding, knowing that if that was Mags she most likely wouldn't want him seeing her in her current state.

It was a soft knock on the door that pulled Mags from her sobbing.

Fuck, someone found her.

She took a couple deep breaths before talking, “Sorry occupied.”

Mags was almost impressed on how quickly she could put a mask on and pretend everything is okay.

“Can I occupy it with you?”

Mags couldn't have gotten off of the ground faster to open the door to the familiar face.

“Thank god you’re here,” Mags pulled Del into a tight hug. To say this party had been complete shit was an understatement. Del just smiled and hugged her even tighter back.

“This bathroom is too big, like what do you do with all this space?” Del asked, trying to bring up anything beside the fact that Mags had been crying in the bathroom for the past hour.

Mags could put on her mask all she wanted, but Del could see through it. Del could see her pain.

“The marble is a little gaudy for my taste,” Del nodded in agreeance with Mags before joining her on the floor.

They sat in silence, Del waiting for Mags to bring up the real reason that she was alone crying in the bathroom.

“He used to sing to me every night. He said he wrote the song about me, I had fallen in love with falling asleep to his angelic voice,” Mags whispered, fighting back the tears that were fighting to escape.

Del remained silent as the pair sat on the bathroom floor far away from the world that was on the other side of the locked bathroom door. She didn’t truly know Drew. All she knew him as the bastard who broke Mags heart, and she hated every ounce of him for that.

“But now, now he sings to someone else.” Once the first tear escaped, there was no hope holding back the rest. The tears flowed down her face like a river escaping a dam. The moment Mags saw Drew with his girlfriend or wife or whoever the hell the woman he brought to the party was, she was done. She was tired of the cruel world and how it kept kicking her repeatedly even though she was never able to get up. Mags was tired of putting on a tough face. She was tired of pretending everything was fine when the world around her was shattering. She was tired of being Mags.

Del wrapped her arms around Mags, who quickly cried into her shoulder. Del thought she knew what pain was. When her fiance hit her, she thought she knew pain. While that hurt, this was a different type of pain. This was the pain of a young soon to be mother who was thrown to the curb by an adulterous man who could care less what happened to not only the woman he impregnated, but his child as well. He didn’t give a damn about his own flesh and blood.

“Do you wanna go home?” Del asked, earning a small head nod from Mags.

“Can you get me something to drink? He is down there flaunting some chick and I do not think I will be able to handle it sober,” Del nodded her head and placed a small kiss upon her cheek. From the corner of her eye, Mags saw Del talking to Duff probably instructing him to get her her drink. She was relieved to know that Del wasn't walking around alone. Mags didn't get a good look at them, but she swore that she saw Mark and Matt, her ex-fiance, downstairs.

It was only for a second, but Duff and Mags shared a quick moment of eye contact across the room. Mags sent him a small smile which she knew that Duff, just like Del, saw through. Luckily he seemed to not press further and followed Del out of the bathroom.

Time was always a funny thing. For some people a minute could flash before their face while for others that minute could feel like years. For Mags there was one month, one single night a little over a month ago that she kept playing in her head over and over again.

It was the night before Mags had met Del. The night Mags woke up naked in Duff’s room with no condom wrapper around. They were both trashed and it meant nothing. She not only hoped, but prayed that Duff wasn’t the father of her unborn child. She knew it was selfish because Duff would probably make an amazing father, but he was going to make an amazing father to Del’s children whenever they chose to have them. Mags sleeping with Duff was anything, but an important minor detail.

Duff didn’t like the idea of separating from Del, but she assured him that it would only be for a couple of minutes. Once again time was being a funny thing. When Duff returned back to the bathroom where Mags was, his heart stopped. Alone in the room was Mags who was freaking out that Del was alone downstairs. Duff tried reassuring Mags that Del would be okay, but when she told him who was also at the party he ran to go find Del.

Del had found her way to a back room downstairs where there was a closet filled with several pillows and blankets. Del smiled at her find, hoping that a beer and a quick nap would give Mags enough to recover and leave the party with her head held high.

“Long time no see,” Del’s heart stopped at the familiar voice. What was Matt doing in a place like this, and where there was Matt there was also Mark not too far behind.

“Yes, what a month or two? I am sorry, but I have to deliver these to someone so I cannot stay and chat,” Del said trying to stand her ground.

“I think it can wait, this is about Beth. You remember her don’t you? Or do I have to remind you who your best friend was,” Mark’s voice was spitting poison as he handed Del a letter. He couldn't forgive her for the pain she caused.

Del opened the letter, and it was a small invitation to celebrate Beth and Mark’s engagement.

“Congratulations, but I am busy that evening,” Del spat without even looking at the date.

“Oh, will you be posing for another magazine?” Del froze as her ex-fiance stood blocking her only exit out of the room.

“No! If you are referring to the magazine article, most of it wasn’t true. I do not know how they got the scandalous photo of Duff and I, but that wasn’t what the photo was supposed to be used for. It was supposed to be a private photo,” Del shot back.

“Ohh a private photo for Duff”

“Don’t say his name Matt,” Del barked back. She hoped that her shouting would make Matt back down, but her ex-fiance’s smirk only grew.

“Whoah whoah whoah, lets all just calm down. Matt go and stand outside, so I can finish talking to Del,” Matt was about to protest at his words, but one look from Mark and he left the room.

“Touch me and I will scream. I know people here who wouldn’t think twice about beating you up,” Del said once Matt left the room.

“Ohh let me guess you scream, and Duff will come running in here like a knight in shining armour?” Mark laughed at his own words.

“Yes, he loves me.”

“Delilah, stop being such a child. He doesn’t love you. He only wants you for your body, and once he gets bored with you, which he will, he will toss you aside and move onto the next girl” The way Mark said the words made her flinch.

No, she told herself. No, Mark was wrong.

“Beth and I are getting married and I want you to be at the celebration party. I do not care if you come or not for my sake, but I know Beth wants you there.”

“She called me dead,” Del shot back.

“Well Delilah, her best friend left without saying goodbye. If someone who I grew up with and imagined growing old together with just got up and left for some guy, I would be pretty mad too,” Mark shrugged off Delilah’s comment, not really caring if Beth hurt Delilah’s feelings.

“I left her a letter,” Delilah’s voice was barely louder than a mouse. Regret filled her bones as she thought about how badly she hurt Beth, but that wasn’t enough to make her want to go.

“It would be a shame if Duff found out you were cheating on him with that other guy in that article. Ohh what was his name Axl?” Mark didn’t want to take it this far by threatening her, but Delilah needed to come home.

“That is not true. I am faithful and you know that,” Delilah shot back.

“Well here is the thing Del, it is my word against yours. Who is Duff going to believe, you or me? Honestly..even the media thinks you are sleeping around. Plus, even if he does believe you, there will always be that seed of doubt that will eat him alive. He will spend nights getting so drunk that he lies awake trying to figure out if he was ever good enough for a whore like you,” Del interrupted him before he could continue.

“Shut the fuck up, you fucking piece of shit. I am finally happy. I wake up in the morning smiling. I love him. I want to spend the rest of my life with him. I want to have a family with him, and you aren’t going to fuck that up.”

#guns n’ roses fanfic #guns n’ roses imagine #guns n’ roses fanfiction #duff mckagan fanfic #duff mckagan imagine #gnr fanfiction #gnr fanfic #gnr imagine #guns and roses imagine #guns and roses fanfic #guns and roses fanfiction #guns n roses fanfiction #guns n roses imagine #guns n roses fanfic #the dare #ubernoxa

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thotsforvillainrights · 4 years ago

Note

Maybe... maybe... some Setsuno with a s/o who can't figure out how get their baby (adopted or birthed) to drink some milk? And then he helps them... I'm sorry if it's a lot... be sure to drink water! 🌹💜💖💕🖤💚💚💜💚💜💗💝💞💟

(I just wanna say 1st of all, thanks for paying attention to my content and requesting something that everyone can easily insert themselves into IE: adopted OR birthed. 2nd of all, I am drinking some cold water right now, so thank you for worrying!)

~Setsuno’s baby won’t drink Milk~

headcanon|scenario|imagine|match-up

-Parenthood so far wasn’t that bad...if you don’t count the getting up at all hours of the night to check on the crying from the other room. But aside from that, being a parent was truly something you were happy about. A large part of that had to do with Setsuno being right by your side through it all. Ever since (and even long before) you brought the baby home, he’s been on full daddy mode. This man has made google, books, and youtube his best friend. He is fully prepared and pretty much adamant on making sure things are okay with the baby. His only flaw might be that he’s a bit overprotective and is prone to worry too much, but that’s another story.

-Anyhow, things seem to be going well with your baby so far. The house you’ve recently moved into has been offering an amazing amount of space (which was the reason you moved in the first place) and it’s been expertly baby-proofed waaaay ahead of time. The nursery was worked on by Toya himself. The decor was your job. Meanwhile he stayed up all night back then to make sure he would build a sturdy enough crib for the baby. Ya’ll were overstocked with medical stuff you needed, and Overhaul was certainly gracious enough to give Setsuno his approval to leave. He knew Toya would want to be in a safer place You guys pretty much had everything in the bag. Everything except for the fact that babies are unpredictable sometimes.

-The biggest difficulty that just arose was the fact that your kid didn’t want to drink milf for some odd reason. Sure there were alternatives, but milk was important to you and Toya. It had gotten to the point where you were losing sleep thinking about where you might’ve went wrong. Why wasn’t your baby drinking milk? Was there something wrong with them? Was the milk old? Was it too cold, too hot? Maybe the bottle had a bad nipple on it? There were a multitude of factors. Now of course with Toya being the serious daddy that he was, he got right on it in no time!

-One day you came home and he had several different brands of milk in the fridge ranging from almond, to rice milk, to 2%, to regular, and so on. He had also went out and gotten different bottle and different nipples to try. According to him, you two were about to try every combination that you could try! This included warm, cold, a mix of different milk brands, etc. Toya was dedicated to the cause! He also took his internet searches into consideration, opting to offer milk at every turn. He even had a back up plan at getting calcium into the baby’s diet one way or another. Lucky for you guys, you found the solution and the baby greedily suckled down the milk in the bottle!

-After burping your kiddo, and laying them down to sleep, you and Toya gave each other a silent high five before going to revel in the triumph with some good sleep...until of course the baby began to cry again

»—————————–———————————————————–✄

TIp Jar: https://cash.app/$YuTakeyama

#toya setsuno #setsuno toya #Eight Precepts of Death #eight expendables #eightfold cleansers #eight bullets #yakuza #shie hassaikai #bnha #mha #boku no hero academia #my hero academia

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crutchie-with-a-y · 5 years ago

Text

Good Day

(Warning: Drinking, Drunkedness)

“Oh, good mooooooooorning ugly!” Race pulled open his dark red curtains and looked out over the rainy Manhattan streets. He didn’t necessarily dislike ugly weather, he was just telling it like it was. The clouds were a smudged pencil gray and had opened up on the pedestrians scurrying to their office or subway station to start the week. Race decided he wasn’t dreading this morning, at least, not as much as everyone else. Even though the Monday after a long holiday weekend always seemed to be particularly grueling, Race wasn’t having it. He pulled on his shirt and buttoned it up, looking in the mirror as he fixed his collar. A good day, that’s what this was. He rolled his wrists around in his crisp cuffs as he shook out his golden curls. Medda from human resources had once told him that every day was a good day if you just decided it was. He cracked his neck and slid his hands into the deep pockets of his dark dress pants, and, deciding he looked respectable enough, slid across the floor in his black dress socks, skidding through the doorway of his bedroom as he grabbed his shoes off the ground.

A good day, he repeated to himself as he hopped into his kitchen, popping the shoe on one foot and then the other as he leaned against the counter. Let’s think about it, he thought, opening a cabinet to grab a tumbler for his coffee, a great job, great friends, the holidays just around the corner, and he had just gotten HBO go, and what a great investment that was proving to be. He popped the lid off the tumbler and walked over to the coffee machine. Now, some may call him old fashioned, but Keurigs were wasteful, and it was just a lot easier to make one pot of coffee and just always have it there, in case he needed a pick-me-up when he got home. The first thing he did in the morning was to hop out of bed and start the coffee, then shower and get dressed. Another thing to be grateful for, Rave thought as he poured, routine. A healthy one at that. How many people could say they had that, he asked himself, opening his fridge and grabbing his hazelnut creamer. Not a lot of people. He flipped off the lid and was disappointed by the few dribbles of white that splashed into his coffee.

“Grrrrr,” Race growled to himself, tossing the empty bottle in the sink. “Hey Ale-no, excuse me, HEY GOOGLE,” He corrected himself as he dumped an unidentified but still horrifying amount of sugar into his coffee. He’d recently parted ways with his Alexa, and since Jeff Bezos was as an asshole, he’d decided not to get a new one.

“How may I help you, Ra-aCecRACK?” The automated voice responded, causing Race to bend over in silent laughter. He’d somehow gave the machine his name wrong, but it was just soooooooo fucking funny to hear that clunky robot voice say Racecrack that he’d just left it that way.

“Yeah, oh my god, uh, please add creamer to my list, and uhhh,” He opened the freezer and frowned, “ ice cream, breakfast sandwiches and grapes I guess, to balance it all out.”

“Creamer, ice cream, breakfast sandwiches, and grapes have all been added to your list.” We're rollin', Race thought as he grabbed his coffee and snatched up his keys, wallet, and Juul from a clay olive dish on the counter that he’d gotten in the office white elephant last year.

“Thank you so very much, Google, I will order you around more when I get home, servant speaker” He opened his apartment door, patting his left pocket to make sure his phone was there.

“You are very welcome. Have a good day!” The voice called as he opened the door.

“Already decided I would, Bitch,”

“...okay then, Ra-aCecRACK.”

Race clambered up the steps of the subway station, glancing down at his phone as he did. 8:34. Perfect, he thought, dashing across the crosswalk as the orange hand began to flash. He speed-walked down the sidewalk and up to a Jack in the Box. Plenty of time, plenty of ti-

Race’s thoughts on timing were immediately cut short when a man walked past him through the door of the fast-food place. His breath hitched. He blinked and walked into the building, taking a sharp right to the restrooms and ripping open the door to the single-stall, locking it behind him. He slammed his back against the door and slid down it to the floor, his hands attempting to rub the small tears back into his eyes.

The man he’d walked past hadn’t done anything wrong, Race didn’t even know him. The only offense this man had committed was wearing the same cologne as a certain man named Austin.

Who just happened to be Race’s ex. As of quite recently.

The two-year relationship had ended with lots of fights and lies, and then finally an evening where Race had come home to a practically empty apartment.

“God, Race you’re so so so so so stupid.” Race said to himself, smashing his eyes into his fists. He sat there for a moment, eventually giving up and letting the angry, heartbroken tears come. This was why he had to remind himself to have a good day. This is why he had gotten that stupid Google Home to replace the Alexa that had been taken. Because he couldn’t stand a lonely, empty apartment, where it was always silent, a constant reminder he was alone. The only were sounds were the ones he made, him going to the fridge for a beer, him sobbing into a pillow, his sarcastic commentary to no one but the walls. This is why he’d gotten that stupid thing, to just make it seem like he wasn’t entirely alone, give the illusion that there was someone to talk to, even if it was just to tell them to turn on music or to remind him to buy something. And this is what led to him laughing alone, at 7 am, in a kitchen with only a microwave and the fridge that came with the apartment and some plastic silverware because he wasn’t ready to face the fact he needed to go furniture and appliance shopping by himself, to his fake robot roommate calling him Racecrack.

“Racecrack.” Race whispered. He giggled sadly. “RaaACEcraCk.” He let his hands drop to his side and he sigh-laughed, his shoulders slumping with emotional exhaustion as the misspoken name echoed against the tiles of the bathroom.

“rAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaacccccccceeccccRrRrRaccccccck.” He took a deep breath and shook his head. He pulled himself up with the corner of the sink and looked at his red eyes in the mirror. “Ew.” He splashed water on his face, figuring that if it worked in the movies he might as well try it. He dried his face and rolled his shoulders back, looking himself in the eye one last time before leaving the bathroom to go and order.

“Good Day.”

“Morning, Race!” Hannah looked up from her receptionist’s desk as Race walked in. “What kept ya so long?”

“There was a line for breakfast.” He leaned against her desk, waving his breakfast sandwich around before taking a huge bite of the greasy sausage and cheese mess which he held together between two paper napkins. Hannah chuckled.

“Don’t worry I covered for you.” She reassured him, and then, before he could react, leaned forward and snatched a chunk of his breakfast. Race’s jaw dropped dramatically. “Lying-for-you-tax,” Hannah said, covering her full mouth as she talked.

“RACE!! Race, have you filed your report yet, dumbass?” Jack’s head suddenly poked up out of one of the many cubicles in the office. Davey’s head popped up next to his, his hair a little rumpled, causing both Hannah and Race to look at each other.

“Yeah, because all of that hard work you’re doing with Davey in there?” Race raised an eyebrow at them.

“Oh it’s hard alright,” Hannah added, followed by many OOOOOOOOOOOHs erupting from the cubicles of people who were eavesdropping. Race high-fived Hannah as Jack elbowed Davey out of his cubicle. The chuckles died down while Jack hopped up on top of his desk so he could stare down at everyone in their cubicle like he usually did when he needed to tell everyone something important, or at least something he thought was important. People leaned back in their chairs or stood up and leaned their arms over the tops of their cubicles, chewing on pens or making stupid faces at one of their coworkers while their boss talked.

“Oh yeah, haha, very funny everyone. But seriously though, we need need to actually get some work done today-”

“But that’s not my job!” Henry shouted over the complaining noises that followed. Jack looked at him like he was a spot of mold on a brand new loaf of bread.

“Yes actually, it is.” Crutchie reminded him, rolling his eyes.

“DAMN IT.” Henry slammed his hand on his desk.

“Aright, seriously though,” Jack said as chuckles shook the cubicle walls. “The new Company Event Planner’s first day is today, and they’re gonna be working in our space so Joe will be bringing them down.”

“What’s their name, Jack?” Mike called, tapping his cheek with a pen. Jack rubbed the back of his neck.

“I don’t know..I didn’t actually open the email so,” The office sigh-laughed collectively at their always-behind boss. “BUT Joe will be in here, so we do have to have something to show for our day.” A collective groan washed over the office.

“Also,” Medda snapped for everyone’s attention from her corner of the room. “We’re having a welcome party for them at 3:30, so if you didn’t remember to bring a dish to share I suggest running to Trader Joe’s on your lunch break.”

“And I already brought chips and salsa so you will have to be creative,” Finch added.

“You going to visit the Trader, Race?” Buttons poked his head in Race’s cubicle while a large group of their coworkers gathered by the door. Race looked up from his computer and then to the form he was filling out.

“Uhhh, I’ll catch up with you guys, I want to finish this before lunch.”

“Okay, see ya!” Buttons darted off to crowd into the elevator with everyone else. Race sighed. He had a lot of work he needed to get done. With a new event planner, his job would technically be easier, but would also require a lot of teamwork between the two of them. Race’s official title was “Community Outreach Supervisor” and, like everyone else in the office, his job was actually meant for like five. I don’t mind though, he thought to himself, and he didn’t. He liked getting to work with prominent community members, he’d met some incredible people since he’d gotten this job, and he liked being busy, it kept his mind off other things he’d rather not think about. And lately, that was a lot of things.

Currently, Race was working on organizing job shadowing and internships by local high school students. He’d been emailing back and forth with a counselor who was plenty nice, but kinda sucked at providing him with all the information he needed. He hoped it would work out though. After going to several job fairs in gymnasiums crowded with confused students, he realized how important it was. The kids he met with were wonderful, they were polite and eager to learn, and he wanted to make sure they all got jobs they liked, were good at, and could make a living doing. This goddamn counselor, however, was not exactly putting a lot of effort into helping him do that.

“Whatever.” Race closed a few tabs and put his computer to sleep as he stood up and slid his jacket off the back of his chair. He walked out of the office and down the hallway, jogged down a few flights of stairs, and took a deep breath of city air. Before he could exhale, however, an aggressive rain whipped across his face.

“For fuck's sake.” Race flipped up his hood and rammed his hands into his pocket, as he ran as fast as he dared down the block with his head down. He dashed across the Trader Joe’s parking lot and headed toward the sliding doors, unsuccessfully trying to dodge the several shoppers who were losing control of their carts on the wet concrete.

“Oh, I’m sorry,” A voice said half-heartedly as the sharp metal corner of a shopping cart jammed itself into Race’s ribs, temporarily knocking the breath out of him.

“Good...day,” Race wheezed as he dragged himself into the store, clutching his side. He staggered through the isles, trying to think of something nobody else would have thought to grab, which did not exist. He looked longingly at the shelves lined with liquor but knew that today was not the day to break office policy. Wondering if there was some sort of pizza bagel-esc thing he could grab, Race turned abruptly into a freezer aisle. Only to be hit in the face with the edge of a freezer door.

“Oh. my god.” His hand slammed over his right eye and he steadied himself against a closed door, one arm still wrapped around his torso. A young woman holding a pint of ice cream gasped and rushed over to him.

“I’m s-s-o sorry, sir!” she stuttered, unsure of what to do. “Are you alright?” Nope, Race thought, feeling a bruise forming, but a glance at his watch changed his answer.

“Yep, no worries!” He straightened up immediately and darted down the aisle, ignoring the water that flooded his eye when he looked into the light. Joe was set to bring in the new event planner in ten minutes, and Joseph Pulitzer was always right on time. He squinted across the entire store, finally giving up and returning to the freezer section and grabbing the first thing his eyes landed on.

“Gluten-free cheesy quinoa bites. Perfect.” Race declared aloud, stacking his arms withs several boxes, and then heading toward the express lane.

“RACE FINALLY!!!” Jack threw his arms out toward the wet-haired blonde that stepped through the office doors holding a ripped paper bag.

“Calm the hell down, Jack.” Race snapped, carrying his bag into the kitchen where the table was piled high with jugs of apple cider, plates of cookies, and vegetable platters. He chucked the hipster cheddar snacks or whatever the fuck they were on into the freezer and jammed the bag into the recycling. He stomped back to his cubicle and shrugged his coat off as he plopped into his chair. He leaned forward and rested his elbows on his desk, rubbing his eyes with his fingers.

“Hey, Race! Want some more coffee?” Davey stepped up to his desk and shook the coffee pot he held in one hand and winced when he splashed some on his hand.

“Yes, God Please.” Race grabbed his mug that had been sitting on his desk for who knows how long and held it up to be filled.

“Joe’s gonna be down in a few minutes so make sure you look like you’re working,” Davey advised as he poured. He looked at Race’s face for the first time and gasped. “What happened to your face!”

“What?”

“Oh, I mean not like, it’s just....your eye.” Davey sputtered. Race whipped around to look at himself in his computer monitor.

“What’re you talking ab-oh, my god.” A black eye had formed where Race had been hit in the face had Trader Joe’s.

“It’s not that bad.”

“Davey, you are a terrible liar.” Race snapped, opening a desk drawer and shoving boxes and papers aside.

“Can someone get Race some ice?” Davey yelled towards the kitchen.

“On it.” Someone yelled back. Davey looked back down to see Race unscrewing the cap of a flask and pouring its contents into his coffee.

“What is that!?” Davey pointed with a dropped jaw.

“Creamer.” Race said knocking the contents of his mug back and then slamming it onto his desk.

“Race! You can’t be tipsy during Joe’s visit!” Davey whisper shouted as Finch spun into the cubicle with an ice pack wrapped in paper towels.

“Oooh, Race is tipsy?” Finch grinned mischievously.

“I won’t be able to survive Joe’s visit if I’m not tipsy.” Race retorted, taking the ice pack from Finch and pressing it against his eye. Finch chuckled and leaned against the empty desk on the other side of the cubicle from Race’s, crossing his arms.

“So you get in a fight or-”

“wHYYYYY HELLLOOOOOOO THERE! IF IT ISN’T JOSEPH PULITZER HIMSELF!” Jack shouted his greeting to alert the rest of the office of their boss’s presence.

“Ah, shit.” Finch leaped up onto the empty desk and hurled himself over the wall into his cubicle. Davey shot out of Race’s space and dashed across the office, the entire office hearing him jump into his chair and then spin into his desk with a thud. A sweaty Jack escorted his boss and a new hire into an office full of stifled laughter. Joseph Pulitzer raised a critical eyebrow but decided to let it slide, and walked up to the front of the office so that he could introduce his newest employee.

“Hello, everyone. As I’m sure you all know, I’m here to introduce our new event planner. Our company has long been on the search for a...” Race paid absolutely zero attention. As Joe droned on, he attempted to balance a pencil on the tip of his nose, wobbling it back and forth until Sniper reached over the wall and snapped it off his face.

“You bitch!” Race’s exclamation was met with a round of disapproving hushes. He just scoffed and pulled out another pencil continuing to wobble, his chair creaking underneath him. When that pencil fell, he looked at it on the ground, decided it was too much work to reach down and pick it up, and grabbed another one from the broken mug by his keyboard filled with pens with mismatched caps, bent paperclips, and an assortment of chewed pencils. As he tilted his head up to place the pencil on his nose, he noticed the middle-aged man still talking at the front of the room. God, he’s still here? Race thought. He shook his head lightly and gently pressed the eraser against his nose.

“So please join me in welcoming Spot Conlon!” A round of applause shook the office, knocking the pencil off Race’s nose.

“Oh, we’re clapping.” Race banged his palms together obnoxiously before realizing there was an unopened email from the school counselor he’d been working with sitting in his inbox. He clicked on it and read it speedily, his eyes scanning for any ounce of the information he’d actually asked for.

“Now, I’ll show you to your desk,” Pulitzer said, Race barely noticing as he scrolled through the counselor's useless paragraphs. “Good afternoon, Mr. Higgins.”

“Look, lady, I don’t care about how many years you’ve been doing this, I just need to know how many kids are applying!” Race yelled at his monitor, completely oblivious to the two men standing behind him. A snort that Race didn’t recognize caused him to look up, and he met eyes with his annoyed boss.

“Wha-Oh, hello, Joseph.” Race grinned widely. “How are you doing on this lovely winter day?”

“Mr. Higgins, I’d like you to meet our, new event planner, Spot Conlon.” Pulitzer gestured to the short but broad man standing next to him with an amused look on his face, the same one who’d snorted at Race’s email rage. Race turned in his chair.

And looked into the most beautiful eyes he’d ever seen.

They were dark brown and deep, eyes that had seen everything, smart eyes. Eyes that told a story. Eyes that looked at something and figured it out. Eyes that saw people for what they were. Eyes that were smart and hardworking. Eyes that lit up when the rest of the face barely moved. Eyes that Race could get lost in forever.

Eyes that were looking down at him with a confused look.

“Oh my GOD, I’m an idiot, as you’ve probably already guessed.” Race lept up and over-enthusiastically shook the hand that had been outstretched for way too long without meeting a second one.

“No shit,” Spot said with a smirk. Race wanted to crawl into his desk.

“Ah yes, well. I’m sure you will enjoy working here with Mr. Higgins. I will have IT bring up your computer.”

“Sounds good,” Spot nodded. “Thanks.”

“No problem.” Pulitzer stretched a hand out to shake, but Spot had already turned around and flopped into his chair. He, unsuccessfully, tried to turn it into a wave and then turned around to leave, Jack jogging up to him to walk him out.

“So tell me,” Spot said, spinning around in his chair to look at Race. “Is he always such a pompous asshole?” Race laughed nervously, still having trouble looking him in the eyes.

“He can be a bit much.” Spot snorted.

“Don’t sugar coat it. I came in a bit late because my bus got in an accident, and he goes ‘oh so you don’t have a car.’ This is New York. Who the fuck has a car?” Race laughed and shook his head. I love this guy, he thought. It’s been five minutes and he’s already my favorite person on earth.

“Alright, fine. He is such a goddamn snob that he puts a minimum price for how much out outfits for the yearly gala cost, and,” Spot banged his hand on his desk in laughter, the sound of his chuckles and the smile on his face making Race’s heart flutter. “and we can’t wear the same thing as we did the year before.”

“Oh god. I wear the same thing every day, he’s sure in for a shock.” Spot looked at the ceiling, right as their coworkers came up to their cubicle, some of them launching themselves over the walls and landing next to them. Spot’s eyes widened. “Is....is this normal for you all to come at each other like the stampede that killed Mufasa?” He leaned toward Race as he said this, and Race felt like his face was on fire as the rest of the office laughed.

“Only when old Scar comes sauntering in and throws someone new into our gorge.” Specs responded, jabbing a thumb towards the door their boss just went through. Everyone laughed, and Race couldn’t help but stare at Spot as he rubbed his chin as he chuckled. You could cut ice with that jawline, he thought.

“Yeah...Alright, so I’m the head of this floor, Jack,” Jack stepped forward and motioned for the others to follow. “This is Hannah, she does most of the talking with prospective new clients, and she will greet you by the door every morning-”

“I’m not like a talking welcome mat or anything, that’s just where my desk is.” Hannah butted in, her comment greeted by a smirk from the coworkers.

“Right, and this is Davey, he does budgeting and money stuff, and this is Albert, head of marketing....” Jack continued to introduce everyone, each person stepping forward as he said their name. “And, saving the best for last, this is the lovely Ms. Medda, head of HR.”

“Alright.” Spot nodded with a pleasant look on his face. “I’ve already forgotten everything you just said, but I’m sure by Christmas I will have stopped calling you the names you’ve all been assigned in my head.”

“No worries,” Medda smiled as everyone chuckled. “We are having a little welcome party for you, so if you wanna follow us to the break room.” Everyone turned out of the cubicle and headed towards the break room, but Spot waited until Race had stood up to start moving.

“Lead the way,” he said, making Race’s ears turn bright red. Once they got there, people were pouring drinks and stacking paper plates high with cookies and tortilla chips and chatting about the events of the day. Medda waved Race and Spot towards the table.

“Help yourself! It’s your party.” She smiled and gestured to the array of food in front of them. Spot bit his lip and inhaled loudly, causing Medda’s face to drop. “What is it?”

“Oh, I’m sorry.” Spot shook his head, “It’s just that....I’m gluten-free.” Race looked up quickly.

“Oh, dear. Well...I’m sorry about that, we’ll have to keep that in mind next time.” Medda shook her head.

“No, no wait!” Race ran over to the freezer and held up his Trader Joe’s purchase. “I got this gluten-free ch-”

“CHEESY QUINOA BITES!” Spot interrupted and grabbed the box out of Race’s hand giddily. Race chuckled and rubbed the back of his neck.

“Yeah...”

“I’m sorry, I LOVE these things, bro,” Spot apologized as he opened the box.

“Wait, really?” Race’s heart leaped.

“Yeah,” Spot looked up at the microwave and squinted at the buttons. “How do you work this thing?” Race laughed at walked over to help him, his smile practically busting his face with the joy that his desperate purchase and been a good one.

An hour or so later, the cheesy bites were gobbled down and everyone was seated at the table, telling Spot office stories and asking him questions. Race sat on his left, sipping root beer and watching closely. Spot was absolutely fascinating. Race just couldn’t tear his eyes away from him. The way his chocolate brown eyes dance when he talked, how he leaned forward on one elbow when he told a story. And his stories! They were incredible! He told stories of growing up in Brooklyn, which was mere miles away, that kept everyone on the edges of their seats and made the walls shake with laughter.

“Speaking of drunks, I’m new to this area, any bars you all would recommend?” Spot asked the group, pulling Race out of his daze.

“Oh well, THAT, my friend is a question for no other than Racetrack Higgins.” Finch walked around the table and gripped Race’s shoulder. “He holds the shot record of the office, and has the best drunk stories this side of the Hudson.” Race felt his ears go red. What a great way to start things off with the cute new guy, he thought, ‘Hello, I’m the office drunk!’ He wanted to just laugh it off, but then he looked up at Spot.

“Is that so?” Spot turned to face Race and placed his elbows on the table, leaning forward, challenging him with his eyes. “Then, please, Enlighten me.” Race looked directly into those eyes and rose to the challenge, straightening up to meet his gaze because he knew, no matter how attractive Spot was, nobody told a story like Racetrack Higgins.

“I’d love to,” Race responded confidently, recognizing his comfort zone. “But I think some tequila would make it a little better.” He looked up at the clock as the group snickered, and back at Spot who wore a smirk that recognized exactly what Race was doing. “It’s about five, what say we all pack up and go down to Maria’s for some shots and tacos?”

“But, Race...it’s Monday,” Crutchie said, looking around for someone else to agree with him.

“Yes, and if I remember correctly happy hour at Maria’s starts an hour earlier on Mondays, so let’s get going.” Race slapped the table and stood up, heading out of the room and all but declaring that they were going. Spot was close behind him and the others shrugged and followed suit as Crutchie silently shook his head.

“So how’s the bartender at Maria’s?” Spot asked Race as he walked into their cubicle, pulling his laptop back off the floor and setting it on his desk.

“Oh, Aaron? Fantastic, heavy pour and great mustache.” Race responded as he slid his jacket over his shoulders.

“Ah, I see you know him quite well.” A look of...something flashed in Spot’s eyes. Was it...jealousy? He wasn’t sure, but whatever it was, Race grabbed hold of it and dragged it back.

“Oh yeah, we go way back.” He said, chuckling as if remembering an embarrassing story. “I’ve spent many a bad breakup with his shaker and that mustache giving me advice.” The same look stayed in Spot’s eyes, but he laughed as they headed out of the office and into the elevator.

“TINA!” Race shouted as he walked through the doors of Maria’s Mexican Bar and Grill, throwing his arms toward the hostess leaning on her elbow at the front desk while his coworkers piled in behind him, shaking off droplets of rain and stomping their feet on the mat in the doorway. She looked up at the group, her long dreadlocks framing her well-highlighted cheekbones and jawline that she drummed against with her long, glittery maroon nails.

“Oh well if it isn’t Shitface Race!” Tina grinned mischievously, gathering a stack of menus in her arms for what was going to be a large table. The group laughed and Spot looked at Race with a dramatic jaw drop.

“Ah, Tina.” Race ran his tongue along the inside of his cheek and leaned over the desk on one elbow. “Try not to expose me to much in front of my guests.”

“Oh I won’t,” She assured him, throwing her dreads over her shoulder and beckoned for the group to follow her through the crowded restaurant to the largest booth. “Now will you be requiring any tissues on this visit and will you be ordering your usual three margaritas?” She joked as she winked at Race and gestured for the coworkers to sit.

“Actually, my dear,” Race clarified over the chuckles, folding his hands on the table and swallowing hard when he noticed Spot sliding into the booth next to him. “We are here for shots!”

“And food!” Elmer added, greedily opening the menu and licking his lips.

“Then I’ll start y’all with some chips and salsa?” Tina clasped her hands together in front of her.

“And guac!” Race hit Tina with finger guns and dancing eyebrows.

“It’s extra!” She shot right back at him with her manicured nails.

“We can stretch it,” Jack said and slung his arm over Spot’s shoulders. “This is a cause for celebration, after all, Spot here is new.” Spot waved awkwardly at Tina and leaned away from Jack, causing Race to inhale sharply when he felt his shoulder brush against him.

“That’s code for ‘Jacks buying.’“ He said, jutting a thumb towards his manager.

“Good to know I won’t have to split the bill!” Tina smiled, and spun on her heel and walked towards the kitchen, ignoring Jack's protests and the group's laughter.

“Hey!” The group looked up to see two women holding hands, one redheaded and one dirty blonde, waving at them as they weaved in between tables to get to their booth.

“Oh my god, Kath and Sarah!” Henry waved back and scooted as far in as he could, attempting to make room for the couple.

“What are y’all doing here?” Sarah asked as Katherine squished up against Henry and pulled her down to sit on her lap.

“We’re celebrating a new member of our team on floor six,” Mush gestured towards Spot.

“With shots!” Race said gleefully. Spot leaned towards him and whispered in his ear. He was barely able to hear what he said over the pounding of his heart.

“Who are they?” Race opened his mouth but was unable to form words, wishing he had asked Tina to break a round of waters. He swallowed and looked straight ahead at the women, knowing that if he looked Spot in the eyes this close he would explode.

“The lively ginger is the one and only Katherine Pulitizer, yes, the daughter of our boss. Interestingly enough, she works for our biggest competitor.” Race explained, stretching his hand toward his superior’s offspring.

“A fact that he does not know and shall never know,” Katherine added, her eyes wide. Race could see Spot’s smirk out of the corner of his eye and he melted a little bit just at the sight of it.

“And that lovely gal on her lap is Sarah Jacobs, she works upstairs in design and is Davey and Les’s sister.” Medda continued the introduction. Sarah grinned, fanning her dimples with awkward jazz hands.

“And this, ladies, is Spot, our new event planner.” Race looked back at Spot and caught his eye, and immediately whipped back around when he felt his face on fire. Katherine noticed and waggled her eyebrows at him before cupping her hands over her mouth to whisper into her girlfriend’s ear, whatever she said resulting in Sarah dramatically dropping her jaw at him. Thankfully, before either of them could say anything, Tina came up to the table, her arms lined with baskets of chips and ramequins of salsa and guacamole. Followed close behind her, to Race’s excitement, was another waiter, holding a tray of shots.

“Holy shit,” Romeo laughed as the group clapped and whistled, excitedly rubbing their hands together for the next events of the night. As Tina took down orders, Race tried to get someone’s attention to slide the shots his way. Eventually, Spot noticed and he smiled, making Race want the liquor even more so it could calm the butterflies in his stomach.

“I’ve got an idea,” Spot grabbed his napkin and slid the fork out of it and, reaching across the table, dragged the tray towards them. Race quickly followed suit, sliding the salt shaker with them as they pulled it across the table.

“Good thinking,” He winked at him, and Race immediately reached for a shot while Spot licked the back of his hand and poured salt on to the moistened area. By now, Tina had taken everyone’s order and the group was munching on chips and watching the pair like popcorn and a movie. “Now, if you please, Race, entertain me with some of your infamous drunkard’s tales.” Their friends banged on the table in excitement, egging Race on.

“Once,” Race quickly dabbed on and licked off his salt and then downed a shot, slamming the glass back onto the table when it was empty, “upon a hangover....” Spot’s eyes caught his, the way they dance intensifying the warm fuzzy feeling the tequila had gifted Race as their group erupted into wall-shaking laughter, carefree and ready to get plastered.

“Are you FUCKING serious!?” Spot jokingly shoved Race as they exited the bar for the night, a little harder than he probably meant to as the liquor coursing through him had lessened his awareness of his strength. “Rhiana was really there?” Race’s heart still jumped at his touch, but it was less overwhelming with the buzzing of his head.

“Yes, and let me tell you, Rhi-Rhi loves her RUM RUM RUM RUM RUM,” Race stumbled into cool Manhattan air, imitating the hip-hop star.

“That’s amAZING!” Spot’s eyes went wide at him as their drunk friends staggered out behind them, each laughing harder than the next.

“HOLY! FUCK!” Sarah shouted as she stomped onto the icy cement. “IT IS! COLD! AS FUCK!”

“YES! We should build a lil’ fire.” Davey squatted down to warm his hands on an imaginary bonfire, tripping, and landing on his ass in a puddle of giggles.

“We cannot do that, SILLY.” Jack bent over to help him up, almost falling himself. “There is no wood!” He waved around at the absence of trees as his friends nodded in agreement.

“Well, then maybe we can heat things up ourselves,” Davey retorted, slamming his lips on Jack’s and aggressively pushing his fingers through his hair. The friends gasped and whooped at them, until Jack pulled away, scratching the back of his head with rosy cheeks.

“Ah, AHEM, there’s our Uber!” He pointed, grabbing Davey’s hand and dragging him towards the black sedan that had just pulled up in front of the group. Jack waved goodbye as he opened the door until Davey kissed him again and shoved him inside the vehicle. The coworkers laughed as they pulled away, all drunkenly mumbling about the cold or about work tomorrow, as one by one their Lyfts and Ubers came to take them home.

“Oh my god, I’m going to be hungover for my second day,” Spot whispered to Race as they watched Sarah and Katherine hop into a red Toyota. It was only when he said that did Race realize how close they were standing together. He immediately sobered up as he felt Spot’s shoulders rub against his as his coworker huddled toward him, trying to escape the brisk winds.

“It’-” His voice cracked and Spot laughed obnoxiously, adding to the pink the weather had spread on Race’s ears. “It’ll be fine. I’ve been popping aspirin and vomiting in between meetings on multiple occasions. And this time everyone will be just as gone, so you won’t stick out as much.” Spot chuckled again.

“I guess.” They stood in silence for a while, watching their friends leave, and soon they were the only two left. Race wondered if he should say something, or if he had made him uncomfortable, but Spot spoke before he could. “I had a really fun time here,” He said and turned to look at Race. “I’m going to like working here. I can feel it.” Race laughed dryly, looking directly forward and watching his breath curl into the evening air.

“Don’t be too sure, you’re going to have to sit next to me every day.” Spot turned to him again, and Race felt compelled to meet his gaze and realized his eyes had gone soft.

“That’s the best part,” Spot smiled, and even though he was freezing and he could barely feel his legs and his fingers were burning from the cold, Race felt a rush of warmth shoot through him, racing through his veins and into his joints, his heart almost bursting. “Now, you wouldn’t happen to know what the fuck a gray Corolla looks like do you?” Spot looked back down at his phone as if he hadn’t just set Race’s heart on fire. It took him a minute to form a response.

“I-uh-I think you have your answer right there.” Race pointed to a car pulling up to the sidewalk. Spot looked up and nodded, waved to the driver, and then turned back to Race.

“I guess I’ll see you tomorrow then.”

“Yeah,” Race shuffled his feet. Spot looked at his own feet as if searching for something to say between his shoe buckles.

“By the way,” He looked back up, having found the right words. “Where is a good place for coffee by the office? You know your bars so well you must know the best place for recovery from them in the morning.” Race chuckled.

“The Chadwick Sister’s Coffee makes a mean latte.” He responded. He debated saying more, and then finally took the risk. “I could...meet you at the office early, walk you to it, say 8:30?” He licked his lips and waited for what seemed like thirty hours for Spot’s answer.

“Sounds good.” Spot smiled. This seemed like the end of the conversation, but he didn't turn to leave. “Thanks for showing me the bar, it was fantastic, even though I still think you inflated your shot numbers a little.”

“You’ll beat me next time.” Race smirked. Spot cocked his head as if studying his features with intense curiosity.

“Today was a good day, Race." He said, slowly turning away. "Good night,"

“Good night,” Race said, quieter than he meant to, so quiet he wondered if Spot even heard him. He watched as his new coworker climbed into the Carolla and pulled away. He stood there until he could no longer see the brake lights of the car, contrasted by the exhaust shooting out from underneath the trunk.

“I need to go home.” He said out loud to himself once the street was dark and the only light was coming from the bar behind him. He hadn’t called a cab, and he pulled out his phone to do so but then realized a stop for his bus was just a block away. He jogged towards it, his fists firmly pressed against the bottom of his pocket, wondering if he missed the bus. He wasn’t concerned. Nothing in the world could upset him right now, not even the aggressive sleet that came ripping through the air as his bus stopped at the light just before his stop.

“Sorry about the wait,” The bus driver, a nervous red-headed woman with a septum piercing, apologized, anxiously squeezing the steering wheel as Race climbed through the bus’s open door and up the steps.

“No worries,” He assured her, scanning his bus pass through the back of his phone case. “No worries at all.” He walked to the very back of the bus, passing an old woman who squinted to read her beauty magazine in the dim light and a short man in his early thirties, who sat clutching several paper grocery bags close to his chest. Race slid into a seat just as the bus pulled away from the curb. He leaned his head against the window, watching the raindrops speed down the window, illuminated by the bright traffic lights of the city, Spot’s words echoing in his mind.

He’s right, Race thought to himself.

Today was a good day.

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abandoned-ficlets · 4 years ago

Text

Iwaizumi, the Cat Whisperer

Summary:

Tooru slams the cat carrier down on the checkout counter followed by his cracked volleyball trophy. Ming meows loudly, annoyed, and sticks one paw out of the bars to swipe at him. The cashier, the same spiky-haired guy that helped him pick out cat food on Thursday, eyes Tooru like he’s gone insane.

“How can I help y-“ “I think my cat is defective.”

(In which Oikawa recruits Iwaizumi, a Petsmart worker, to help him with his problems.)

Aoba Johsai’s volleyball team is barely ten minutes into their evening practice when the usual whispers start.

Outside of the gym, a group of girls are huddled around in a circle, sneaking looks and cooing loudly at each other. The thudding of volleyballs hitting the floor serves as a backdrop to their excited voices.

“Oh my gosh, he’s so cute!” One girl squeals, her voice happy.

“What I wouldn’t give to have him come home with me,” Another girl says with a wink at her friends.

“Tell me about it! I don’t want to think what my dad would say about him though.”

“Adorable~ So adorable!”

The words are familiar to Tooru. He’s long since gotten used to his fan club’s praises - happy smiles and blushes that adorn their faces when he acknowledges them during practice. The girls have made it their priority to attend Seijoh’s volleyball practices, the most loyal of his fans sitting in the stands during every single one, cheering loudly whenever Tooru scores against a teammate in a practice game.

Tooru is used to their excitement as they watch him play, yes.

But what he’s not used to is their attention being directed at something other than him: namely, a grungy-looking stray cat that has been interrupting his volleyball practices for a straight week now. Currently, the thing is sitting outside the gym's main door, causing a commotion as the girls lavish it with attention.

The ugly little monster is purring loudly, loud enough that Tooru can hear it on the sidelines as he takes a swig from his water bottle. He huffs at the display, knowing he probably looks ridiculous but also aware that he can’t push away his thoughts of jealousy and betrayal.

A girl coos as the cat scratches at her leg, meowing loudly like it wants to be held. She giggles and picks the thing up, much to the other girls’ envy. They all crowd around her, holding out arms so they can hold him next. Over their shoulders, Tooru can see the cat staring straight at him. He narrows his eyes, trying to send a telepathic message of back off. This is my turf. The cat just blinks lazily at him, completely unconcerned with the warning.

“What’s got you so worked up?” Makki asks as he plops down next to Tooru, spreading himself out on the bench.

Tooru doesn’t respond, continuing to narrow his eyes at the rival cat who still hasn’t broken eye contact. If he didn’t know any better (and he doesn’t), he’d say the stray looks smug.

“Earth to Oikawa? Anyone there?” His friend waves a hand in front of Tooru’s face and finally Tooru looks away from the cat, eyes focusing in on Makki’s trademark smirk.

“I hate cats,” Tooru says, taking one last swig of water and making his way back to the court. He can practically feel the eye roll behind him.

But it’s true; Tooru has never really understood the appeal of cats. They’re rude, stink up the house with their litter boxes, and spend most of the day sitting like useless bricks, napping by the window.

Once, when he was about six, he had tried to pet his friend’s siamese cat. He had reached out with a tentative finger, merely wanting to scratch it behind the ear but the demon had lunged toward him, claws and teeth bared. The cat had only been able to reach for Tooru once before being pulled away, but Tooru had been left with a light pink scar on his cheek that didn’t fade until weeks later.

Since then, he’s sworn up and down that he’d never approach a cat again.

But the girls must not share that sentiment, because day-after-day, without fail, they go the the stray, bringing him food and blankets and water bottles to pour into fancy cat bowls. And day-after-day that cat keeps purring and offering love and affection along with those infuriating stares at Tooru.

The girls love that damn cat so much that’s it’s becoming a serious problem for Tooru. His fans have even started ignoring his volleyball practices to go hang out with the abomination, deciding that a cat is more important than him. More important than Oikawa Tooru. It’s impossible for him to wrap his mind around.

At his coach’s shout, Tooru gets back to practice but anyone can tell he isn’t fully present. His mind is busy, occupied by cats.

---

An hour later, as he bumps up a particularly perfect set to Kindaichi, Tooru realizes something. There is only one way to beat this cat, only one way to come out on top.

He has to adopt it. There is no other way.

Because if he doesn’t - if he leaves the stray to its own devices - the girls will begin to forget him. They’ll start skipping out on practices, stop giving him the attention he so rightly deserves for his volleyball skills. He’ll fade into obscurity, unable to land a volleyball scholarship because no one will be interested anymore, no one will care. He’ll end up with a boring office job and a wife he hates in a house that’s too small. Tooru will become inconsequential.

That’s not going to happen, not if Tooru has any say in it.

And thus, Tooru does what must be done - he sprints out of the gym the moment that their coach dismiss the team, waving off Makki and Mattsun’s curious glances. Less than ten minutes later, he’s walking into a brightly-lit Petsmart, grabbing a cart and passing through the automatic doors.

He looks around the store, not quite sure where to begin shopping for cat supplies. The place is completely foreign territory.

Scanning the brightly lit aisles, he sees colorful fish swimming around in crowded tanks and birds squawking at each other, arguing in loud voices. There is a dog section filled with food and toys.

Finally he lands in a section labeled, Cats, written in block letters on a huge sign. Next to the word hangs a picture of a striped yellow cat playing happily with a red ball of yarn.

“Okay,” Tooru hums, scanning the aisles. “Where to start?”

---

Ten minutes later, Tooru’s cart is filled to the brim. He hadn’t been sure what to get exactly, so he figured the safest bet would be to get one of everything.

He found a large litter-box, enclosed like a small cave (because he sure-as-hell is not going to put up with the stray stinking up his bedroom), a heavy carton of litter that had taken Tooru an embarrassingly long amount of time to pick up, as well as some other things. The food bowls are his favorite find: two turquoise metal dishes with white fish bones imprinted along the side.

The toys are nice too. He was surprised to see the sheer variety - he’d always assumed cats were too lazy to play or do anything but sleep. A long wooden stick with a feather pokes out from amongst all the others. There is only one thing stumping him: cat food.

Dozens of brands, each with their own specific “flavors” and “specialties” line up and down the food section. Tooru isn’t sure if he should go with the one for indoor cats, or the real-meat based one, or even the natural-organic branded one. Does it even matter which one he gets? It’s just cat food. The stray should be lucky it's getting any food at all.

But then again, he doesn’t want to make it sick.

In one arm he picks up a light blue bag. It has a sweet-looking striped gray cat on the front and is labeled “Indoor formula” so it seems like a safe bet. But then again, the organic one looks nice.

He’s about to just throw both into his cart and be done with it when a deep voice rings out on his left side.

“Do you need any help?”

Tooru jumps a little, surprised, before turning to look at the owner of the voice.

It is a worker - probably about Tooru’s age - wearing an employee vest in the most hideous blue color that Tooru has ever seen. Despite that, he’s nice-looking, with spiky black hair and a mouth turned down in a slight grimace.

“Yes actually,” Tooru says after a pause that is only a second too long. He puts on his sweetest voice, the one that Makki likes to roll his eyes at. “I need a second opinion.”

The guy grunts. Tooru takes it as an ‘okay.’

“Let’s say I’m adopting a scrawny stray. Would this” he holds up the blue bag in his right arm, “or that one,” he points towards the organic bag, “be better for it?”

The guy’s eyes flicker between the two before meeting Tooru’s gaze again.

“How old is the cat?”

Tooru shrugs, not entirely sure. He puts the indoor bag back on a random open spot on a shelf. The guy frowns but doesn’t say anything.

“Probably about this big,” Tooru holds his hands about a foot apart.

The guy nods, lips pursed thoughtfully. “You can probably just get the normal-“

“Wait!” Tooru says loudly, noticing but not caring about the annoyed expression that fall on the worker’s face at Tooru’s interruption. “I actually think it might be a few months old.”

He vaguely remembers seeing the cat hanging around before, back at the beginning of the school year. He never paid the creature any mind, but he is at least fifty percent sure about that at least.

“It sounds like your cat might actually be a kitten. You’ll want some of this food,” he says as he leans slightly in front of Tooru so that he can grab one to his right. Tooru takes an automatic step back to make room.

“Thank you,” Tooru says, genuinely, as the guy pulls back, setting the bag in Tooru’s cart. He takes a second glance at the guy. Raking his eyes over his toned form, appraising. Not bad.

"I'm Tooru by the way," Tooru says, injecting his voice with the syrupy sweet quality that draws people to him like flies. He expects the guy to react positively, maybe swoon or blush a little. That’s the normal response to Tooru’s flirting, and Tooru has come to expect it.

Instead the guy doesn’t react at all. He just begins walking toward the checkout counter. "I can check you out over here."

Tooru blinks, surprised. Odd. Tooru tries again, assuming the guy is just shy and needs extra attention.

"Oh, can you now?" He adds extra sweetness to his voice and even winks at the worker, just to make sure his point hits home.

"Yes. But if you keep hitting on me, I'll get my manager to help you instead."

Tooru blinks again, three times before the words finally sink in. Then he's blushing, mortified, and just nods and follows the guy to the checkout corner.

Wordlessly, the guy rings up his items. Five minutes later...

“One hundred and fifty dollars?” Tooru squeaks, voice unbelieving. “For cat supplies?”

The guy shrugs lazily, face bored and gaze directed behind Tooru’s head. “You bought a lot of stuff.”

Tooru swears under his breath, cursing the ugly cat, as he takes out his wallet and rifles through for his allowance - all of it.

The cat had better appreciate his great sacrifice.

---

The next day, Tooru springs the news on his fanclub just as they’re gathering to watch this evening’s volleyball practice.

"Hello girls~" he trills happily, “how are all of you doing today?”

There is a flurry of movement, the girls are taken off guard. Tooru usually doesn’t talk to them before practice, preferring to keep his focus on volleyball for as long as he can. They are happy for his presence though, their smiles make that clear.

The girls all start answering at once, and Tooru can only pick out a few of the responses.

“We’re good, Tooru!” “Thanks for asking!” “I’ve had a great day!”

Tooru smiles back at them and a few giggle.

“I’m glad you all are doing well. I’m feeling quite the same and I have some big news~ Can anyone guess what it is?”

The fanclub titters, none wanting to be the first to speak out.

“Have you,” one of the bolder girls, Asui, starts, “finally agreed to start modeling, Oikawa-san? We all know you got that offer a while back!”

Tooru laughs, shaking his head. “No that’s not it, dear Asui-chan.” The girl’s face lights up at her name and she steps back, nodding with a smile.

“Anyone else have an idea?”

“No, Oikawa-San,” a chorus rings out. “Please tell us!”

“I,” Tooru claps, pausing for dramatic effect. “I am going to adopt the stray that lives outside of the gym!”

There is a brief pause in which the girls absorb this new information, then chaos practically erupts. The gym fills with loud shrieks of joy, and Tooru catches his coach looking on, annoyed.

“That is so great, Oikawa-San!”

“You are the most generous person, Oikawa!”

“The cat will be so happy to live with you!”

Tooru smiles, his voice carrying over the crowd. “Thank you girls, I am excited too. There is one problem though, I don’t have a name for him.”

“Anyone have any suggestions?”

The girls fall over themselves, trying to shout out cute names for the cat. “How about Noraneko?” One asks. Tooru purses his lips, contemplating. It literally translates to “stray cat”. A little on the nose, but it’s not terrible. He writes it down on a paper list, planning to pick one of the names that his fanclub offers.

A few other names are tossed around but none seem right to Tooru. None stick.

---

Later, when Tooru, Makki and Mattsun are all scarfing down their lunch under a cherry blossom tree, Mattsun remembers the list. He leans over Makki to ask his question. Makki makes a sound of protest deep in his throat, but his mouth is so full of food that it can’t form words. His protesting just comes out as a grumble.

“Did you pick a name yet?” Matssun asks.

Tooru shakes his head, eyes focusing on the last rice grain in his bento box. It falls from his chopsticks. “No. Maybe Noraneko but,” he shrugs, looks up at Mattsun. “It’s so uninspired.”

Makki nudges Tooru with his elbow, cheeks still filled with food. “Ma Mrmhp ma nmeme,�� he says, voice unintelligible and flecks of rice falling from his mouth.

Tooru jabs an elbow into Makki’s side. “Eww,” he whines, face twisting into a pout. “Don’t talk with your mouth full, or I’ll make you sit on the other side of Mattsun.”

Makki rolls his eyes and swallows a bit of the rice. His voice is only slightly more intelligible when he says, “why don’t you name him Minikui?”

Minikui? Tooru rolls the name around in his head a coupe times. It literally means ‘ugly,’ and Tooru couldn’t think of a better fit, himself. That cat is one ugly monstrosity. It’s perfect.

“You might just be a genius, Makki. Even if your grades are much lower than mine, there is hope for you yet.”

Tooru is so excited about naming the stray that he graces to ignore the flecks of rice Makki throws at his face.

---

Minikui and Tooru begin their relationship in less-than-ideal circumstances, and Tooru will take most of the blame for that, though the cat isn’t completely innocent either.

Tooru had gone after practice to collect the cat, and his fan club had followed close by his heels. After he had finally wrestled the thing into the carrier (it took about thirty minutes and what seemed like a hundred tries), Tooru had waved goodbye to his friends and fan club, optimism ringing bright in his veins. He was happy this had gone over so well, and though there may have been hiccups (who knew cats could hiss that loudly), he was sure that things would go back to normal. The monster would be locked in Tooru’s room, and the fan club would go back to adoring and supporting him no matter what. And the cat itself was the least of his worries. How hard could it be to take care of one small animal?

It was hard, as it turned out. Very, very hard and frustrating.

It had taken quite some convincing on Tooru’s part to convince his mother to let him keep Minikui. She was surprisingly against the idea, thought he had thought she would like it, but eventually she had caved, only after Tooru promised a million times over that he would take care of the cat all on his own. He would clean the litter box, buy food, and most importantly, pay for all medical bills without any help from his parents.

After all was said and done, she had smiled, patted the purring cat’s head - it was currently exploring Tooru’s room and trying to fit into every small space it could find - and left the two to their own devices.

Tooru had bounced on the bed excitedly the moment the door closed and whipped out his phone.

“Smile Minikui~” he trilled as he snapped a few pictures of the cat, adding them to his instagram with a soft pink filter.

In one, she is peeking out from behind his desk, her tail curled up around the leg and her collar a nice pop of blue against the otherwise neutral background. Another find her looking out the window - very artsy and thoughtful. He adds a few sparkles to that one. And in the last, she is on his bed, Tooru holding the camera near his face to take a selfie with the cat in the background. Under that picture, he titles the post: *Found a new best friend. Sorry, not sorry Makki!*

Within minutes, the likes and comments come flooding in. His fans are obviously overjoyed, and the comments are filled to the brim with hearts and cat emojis and a lot of exclamation points. Somewhere hidden amongst the flood of positive comments is Makki’s own: I hope the cat disfigures you in your sleep. But Tooru pays it no mind, spending the next fifteen minutes liking his fans thoughtful messages.

But after the high from positive attention wears off, Tooru isn’t quite sure what to do next.

He stares at the cat, who is curled up a few feet away, its eyes closed and seemingly sleeping peacefully. It doesn’t look that scary all curled up like that. With a tentative hand, he pats the cat on its head, lightly, just once.

Minikui does nothing, just continues sleeping as though Tooru hadn’t touched her at all. Emboldened by her lack of reaction, Tooru decides to push his luck a little farther. He puts his hand under the cat’s belly, lifts it up and sets it lightly down in his lap. The cat does nothing more than open one eye, checking Tooru out before going back to sleep.

Hmm, he thinks. Maybe this isn't such a bad deal. The cat doesn’t hate him, at least not as much as they though. Maybe this can work, Maybe—

In a flash, Mininkui’s eyes pop open and she chomps down on Tooru’s hand as he yelps. He doesn’t even have the time to blink, let alone snatch his hand away in time.

“Fine, leave,” Tooru holds his hands up above the cat’s head so the thing can get up and walk away. “No one is keeping you hostage.”

In response, Minikui jumps upward, hooking his claws into Tooru’s hand, pulling it down so he can bite into it once again. Tooru pushes the cat off his lap and he falls with a hard thud on the ground, complaining loudly. Tooru looks at his hand; it’s marked with tiny grooves from Minikui’s teeth, curved over his hand in a small arc. He holds the hand in front of its face, shakes it at the cat's uninterested stare.

“Look what you did! Now I’ll have to set with imperfect hands!”

In response, Minikui just eyes Tooru’s hands - looking as though he would like nothing more than to sink his teeth in one more time.

You have no idea what you’ve started, Minikui, Tooru thinks as he snatches his hand away, nursing the injured body part against his chest. This means war.

---

Meow ~ meow ~ meow. The string of cat noises wakes Tooru up like an alarm clock. He lifts his head from the pillow to stare at Minikui. The cat is on his chest, sitting on its haunches and staring intently down at Tooru.

“Hi, ugly,” he says, voice thick with sleep. “Are you hungry?"

Minikui dips his head in what Tooru supposes is a nod, meowing once more.

"Okay, okay," Tooru yawns, "Give me five more minutes and I’ll get your food.” He closes his eyes again, wanting just a few more minutes of sleep.

He feels Minikui move on his chest, walking closer to his head. The cat swipes a couple times at Tooru's hair. Claws get tangled in his bedhead.

“/Minikui/,” Tooru whines, batting at him halfheartedly with one hand. The cat meows again and bats back at him in response. “Five more minutes.”

Tooru turns on his side, bringing the blanket up to his chin and snuggling down further into the bed. Minikui jumps off him and lands with a dull thud on his wood floor. He can hear the cat rummaging around in his room but pays him no mind. Just five more minutes, he thinks somewhat deliriously.

Then, he hears Minikui’s voice from a few feet above him, to the right. “Meow,” and the sound holds the taunting edge that he’s come to fear.

Immediately, Tooru's eyes shoot open an he sits up straight in bed, looking for the reason for that dangerous meow. Sure enough, the demon is on his bookcase, one paw held up behind a volleyball trophy (the participation award he received at the end of elementary school.) Minikui looks disinterestedly at him, grooming a paw while still holding the other up behind the trophy.

“Minikui,” he warns, but it’s too late.

The trophy comes crashing to the floor, and Tooru can hear it splinter. From downstairs comes his mother’s muffled, “Are you okay, Tooru?”

“I’m fine, mom!”

But he's not fine, not at all.

He narrows his eyes at the cat. That’s it. This needs to end. Now.

---

Making a beeline towards the Petsmart checkout counter, Tooru is a man on a mission. Minikui tries every few moments to break free from his restraint, knocking his head against the bars of his carrier but Tooru ignores the cat's struggle.

He slams the cat carrier down on the checkout counter followed by his cracked volleyball trophy. Ming meows loudly, annoyed, and sticks one paw out of the bars to swipe at him. The cashier - the same spiky-haired guy that helped him pick out cat food on Thursday - eyes Tooru like he’s gone insane.

“Can I help y-“

“I think my cat is defective.”

---

Tooru picks the cat up, straining to do so. The stray has almost doubled in size since he first brought him home.

“Look at it.”

“Oi,” Iwaizumi starts, frowning at the cat. “How much are you feeding him?”

“How.. much?”

“Yeah, like a cup a day, a cup and a half? How much does the side of the bag say to give?”

Tooru picks up the cat food bag and sure enough, there is a chart on the side, outlining how much to feed according to their weight.

“You’re,” Tooru pauses, eyes the chart. “You’re not just supposed to feed it whenever it meows?”

Iwaizumi groans and places a finger at his temple, like he’s warding off an impending headache. “We have a lot of work to do, don’t we?”

Tooru shrugs. “Probably,” he says, setting the fat cat down onto the wood paneling.

The cat meows in protest and swats at Tooru’s leg like he’s done something wrong before disappearing under the bed. Tooru looks to Iwaizumi, gesturing toward the cat and back at himself, eyes clearly saying, ‘do you see what I have to deal with here?

Iwaizumi ignores him and takes a few steps forward until he’s in front of the bed. Slowly, he gets down on his knees and lowers his head so that he can see into the shadows.

Tooru probably should warn him about Minikui’s tendency to scratch at anyone’s face if they get too close, but Iwaizumi has been a bit awful to him. Maybe it’s best for him to learn the hard way: through experience, aka getting swiped at by feral claws.

“Minikui,” Iwaizumi calls out in a low voice.

As Iwaizumi busies himself trying to get the cat out from under the bed, Tooru bounces on top it, rolling his eyes. Turning onto his stomach, he lays half off the bed, dangling only inches away from Iwaizumi’s annoyed expression. “It won’t come out, it doesn’t matter how much you call for it. Believe me, I’d know.”

Iwaizumi lifts his head to glare at Tooru but the intimidating effect that he is going for is somewhat ruined by the way his hair is all in his eyes.

“Maybe if you’d talk to him like a living thing, you prick, and not constantly call him ‘it’, Minikui would listen to you,” Iwaizumi pops his head back under the bed so that Tooru’s view is blocked. The man starts making weird clucking noises and calling out Minikui’s name in that same low voice.

The words bubble out of Tooru’s chest as his lips curl up in amusement. “Are you a chicken, Iwa-chan? What is that noise even supposed to do?”

Tooru thinks he hears a growl from under the bed but it’s impossible to know if it comes from Iwaizumi or the cat.

Eventually, Iwaizumi reemerges with the cat in his arms. The monster is purring loudly and cuddling into Iwaizumi’s toned chest like it’s the most comfortable place in the world. Tooru tries not to feel disappointed that there’s not a single scratch marring up Iwaizumi’s handsome face.

“How’d you do that?” Tooru asks accusingly.

Iwaizumi smiles down at the cat. “You just have to be patient,” he scratches behind Minikui’s ears and the purring seems to get even louder. “Cats don’t like being told what to do. You can’t force anything with them.”

“Hmm,” Tooru hums as he watches Iwaizumi sit down beside him on the bed, still scratching behind the cat’s ears. The two look so content, and the way that the sun is shining through Tooru’s bedroom window frames the scene like it’s some sort of painting. He blames the weird flutters in his chest at the strangeness of it all.

“Stop hogging the cat, Iwa-chan. Let me try.”

With a nod, Iwaizumi holds out his arms slowly towards Tooru. The cat stays purring, eyes still closed as it is undisturbed by the movement. But the second Tooru lays a hand on top of its fur, Minikui’s eyes pop open and the cat is jumping out of Iwaizumi’s arms and meowing angrily. ‘Don’t you dare touch me,’ the cat’s eyes seem to say and its tail is puffed up angrily like it’s expecting a fight.

“Right,” Iwaizumi says after a brief pause in which both boys just stare down at the angry cat. It isn’t hissing, but the look in its eyes says that one wrong move and there will be nothing but that ugly sound. “I guess we’ll work on the trust issues first.”

---

“No, you’re petting him all wrong. Do it like this,” Iwaizumi demonstrates. He strokes his hand down the cat’s back, and Minikui purrs happily. But when Tooru tries the same thing, all he gets is an angry lunge towards his hand. Luckily, the claws don’t draw blood.

“No, idiot,” Iwaizumi sighs and shakes his head. “Still wrong.”

Tooru can’t help the way he’s growing frustrated. It’s been almost an hour and there has been little to no progress; the cat still hates Tooru and he hates the thing right back.

“Well then, Iwa-chan,“ Tooru says through clenched teeth. “Why don’t you actually tell me what I’m doing wrong instead of parroting the same word over and over again.”

Iwaizumi ignores his tone and takes Tooru hand with a roll of his eyes, placing it gently on Minikui’s soft fur. “Here,” he says, “I’ll show you.”

Tooru’s eyes widen at the skin contact and the strange feeling of Iwaizumi’s rough skin against his own is enough to melt the agitation away.

With careful movements, Iwaizumi guides Tooru’s hands so that he is petting the cat. At first, Minikui stiffens up and growls threateningly but as Tooru continues petting her, she relaxes ever so slightly.

“There,” Iwaizumi says. “Don’t rub her so roughly and you’re fine.” Then he takes his hand away and by some miracle, the cat stays relaxed. After a minute, he even starts purring. It’s surprisingly adorable.

The three sit in silence until Minikui curls in Tooru’s lap - actually, willingly gets into his lap- and falls asleep. Once that happens, Iwaizumi stands up, brushing off some of the cat hair that had settled on his jeans.

“You two look comfortable. I’ll head out.”

“Wait!” Tooru says loudly and Minikui pops an eye open, growling at him before falling back asleep. “Wait,” he says again in a hushed voice. “Can I get your help again?”

Iwaizumi pauses halfway through slipping on his coat. “I guess,” he says but he doesn’t seem very committed.

“I can bring you something in return. What would you want?”

“Money,” Iwaizumi says rather bluntly, but his face cracks into a small smile at whatever expression Tooru makes at that. The expression disappears as soon as it comes. “It’s fine, you don’t need to pay me.”

Tooru makes a pained face. “Yes I do or I’ll feel guilty.” He taps at his cheek in thought. “How about food or something.”

“Seriously, it’s fine.”

“You’re being purposefully difficult.”

Iwaizumi shrugs, completely unconcerned. “That’s me,” he taps at his phone for a second and then looks back up to Tooru to wave goodbye. “Come by Petsmart next time you need help. I work Tuesdays and Thursdays.”

Then Iwaizumi walks out and Tooru is left with an odd sense of loneliness.

---

The two end up spending much more time than Tooru had thought Iwaizumi would tolerate.

Every day Iwaizumi works, Tooru makes it a priority to keep him company, even on the days where Iwaizumi can’t help him with Minikui. He meets the manager of the Petsmart, an older woman who takes a liking to Tooru immediately. She lets him hang around whenever and even baked him cookies once for his ‘wonderful company’. “Crappy, ass-kissing personality,” Iwaizumi had taken to mumbling under his breath, but Tooru pays it no mind.

Tooru learns that Iwaizumi has endless patience for animals but next to nothing when it comes to Tooru. He sees it when Minikui hisses at Iwaizumi and the boy does nothing but smile patiently and back off to give the cat some space. Or that one time that Tooru was a couple minutes early to Petstmart and he saw Iwaizumi in his natural habitat - on one knee next to a happy dog, laughing as it smeared its nasty drool all over his face.

But the moment Tooru says something a little too flirty or makes an innocent joke at Iwa-chan’s expense, the boy is all anger issues.

“Shut up, Assikawa!” Or, “do you want me to whip this volleyball at your face, Trashykawa?” Or that one special time that Tooru had called him attractive and Iwaizumi’s face changed colors to match the red of a traffic light and he’d pushed a giggling Tooru off his own couch.

Tooru thinks that Iwaizumi is a lot like an animal himself - namely, a hedgehog: prickly on the outside but ultimately harmless.

To be truthful, he doesn’t know much about Iwaizumi, but he wants to know more. That feeling is alien to Tooru and it surprises him. Because, sure, Iwaizumi is hot, but Tooru finds himself wanting to see past that handsome face and learn what’s underneath.

“Hey, Iwa-chan,” he asks one day as he sits on a stack of huge dogs food bags, ones that Iwaizumi needs to stack on the shelves. Tooru may or may not have spent the last fifteen minutes ogling Iwaizumi’s arms as he lifts each one on a shoulder. Who can blame him though, those arms are gorgeous.

“Mhmmpf,” Iwaizumi grunts. It’s his primitive way of saying ‘yes.’ Sort of like a caveman or a gorilla.

“Do you have any pets?”

Iwaizumi doesn’t say anything for a few moments and Tooru is about to retract when he finally answers. “I had a dog but she passed a few months back.”

“Oh,” Tooru blinks. “I’m sorry.”

“Not your fault,” Iwaizumi shrugs off Tooru’s apology. He moves to lift another bag. “She died this summer but it feels like ages ago now.”

“Hmm,” Tooru hums, staring at Iwaizumi as he heaves the bag over his shoulder. The other boy doesn’t /seem/ like he was affected by Tooru’s question, but there is this small crinkle between his brows and he hasn’t looked Tooru in the eyes yet.

“What was her name?”

“Molly.”

“That’s a pretty name,” Tooru comments.

“Yes. My younger sister named her.”

“What kind of dog was she?”

“Golden retriever.”

“What-“ Tooru pauses, worries his lip between his teeth. He doesn’t know if it’s okay to ask but the words come out anyway. “What happened to her?”

Iwaizumi doesn’t pause in his movements. He tosses the bag onto the shelf. The metal shelves vibrate under the additional weight, and then still. Iwaizumi’s back is turned when he answers.

“Hit by a car,” he says matter-of-factly. “It sucks but that’s just what happens sometimes.”

If Tooru didn’t know any better, he’d think that Iwaizumi was unaffected. But because he has been watching the other boy so closely these last few weeks, he can spot the difference from his normal demeanor. Iwaizumi’s shoulders are just the slightest bit higher, muscles pulled taught with tension. His head is slightly down turned, his expression is likely taut, though Tooru can only guess that much because Iwaizumi still has not turned to face him. He’s /sad/, Tooru realizes. Immediately, a rush of guilt washes over him. He shouldn’t have asked the other boy so many questions.

“I’m sorry,” Tooru says, his words soft and gentle. They float between the two, and Tooru hopes that Iwaizumi takes them instead of brushing them off.

For a long moment, Iwaizumi’s shoulders inch minutely higher. The tension builds, and Tooru hopes fervently that he hasn’t made Iwaizumi so upset that he will cry. The seconds pass. Above them, the speakers is playing some sort of happy pop song. Tooru wishes a few things - that the stupid music would stop playing first of all, but he mostly just wishes Iwaizumi would turn around so Tooru would see his face.

Then, with a loud sigh, all the tension rushes out Iwaizumi’s body. His shoulders lower and he turns around to meet Tooru’s eyes. Though Tooru thought he expected it, he is still a bit surprised to see the sadness there.

“Move over,” Iwaizumi commands as he moves to sit next to Tooru on the bags of dog food. Tooru complies readily, scooting over a few inches. The plastic crinkles underneath them, the sound emphasizing their movements.

The new position is close, but not uncomfortably so. Tooru can feel the heat of Iwaizumi’s body, only a few inches away, and he feels a strong urge to move his leg out just enough that he can feel that warmth up close.

“Do you want to see a picture of her?” Iwaizumi asks, pulling out his phone from his back pocket.

Tooru nods. He waits patiently for Iwaizumi to search through his photos until he finds a suitable one of Molly.

He catches brief glimpses of Iwaizumi’s life through the scrolling photos. He sees one of Iwaizumi with his sister, their faces close and happy - a setting sun behind them. There is one of Iwaizumi’s...

#i am overly attached to this one and its so embarrasing #lol its not great #but whatever #haikyuu!!#maybe continuing #but probably abandoned

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beautystroke · 4 years ago

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Top 22 Best Sunscreens for Tanning Reviews & Buying Guide 2020

In this article, let’s take a look at the best sunscreens for tanning and some more amazing facts about sunscreen and safe tanning. Now, to save your time, here we will talk about the sunscreen. The first fact is that you should know how much sunscreen you are going through. Let’s go over some quick tips on how to remove tanning. The first thing is that to remember you see the effects of ultraviolet rays until much later. If you do not believe us, speak to a dermatologist. You only need a teaspoon of sunscreen on your face. If you are not going outdoor too. SPF15 or 20 is probably enough to last you all day. Many facial moisturizers and foundations offer at least this much broad-spectrum protection and you would not need to apply as much. But at any rate. Be sure to put on sunblock at least 15 minutes before you go outside. Rays that make it through to your skin.

Sunscreen works as a chemical and mineral sunscreen by filtering the sun’s rays, whereas, sunblock works as a physical sunscreen, reflecting the sun’s rays. Though sunblocks may be undesirable cosmetically as most of these are opaque. Sunscreen for tanning will help you based on the sun now that you have a brief overview let’s get started with the reviews so you can find what you need. Tanning has been a favored pastime of women everywhere since at least the 1950s.but with so many opinions and ideas out there – it’s not the 50s anymore and we know that tanning can be dangerous if no precautions are taken. So we have done our homework and we are dispelling the top sunscreen tanning.so can make the most out of your time in the sun.

You had been surprised what a fantastic tan you can achieve by preparing your skin with a tan accelerator, then layering on an SPF before heading out. It’s why we created our new mineral sunscreen tan smart, the first sunscreen of its kind to include s tan accelerator which we call our tan boost technology, to make the most of the select protection factors, which is the indication of the efficiency of a given sunscreen. Its blocks he sun rays send will possibilities you to stay longer and more safely under the sun. When sun rays are the strongest. Pull put these sunglasses and wear them, too. That’s because ultraviolet rays can still damage your eyes. Just ask anyone who’s had cataract surgery.

Why sunscreen is important:

Sunscreen will be your best friend on protecting your skin from ultraviolet rays. They are the UV and UVB rays, and as, we discussed before, the UVB radiation will tan and possibly burn your skin on the outer layers and shades. Uvb will penetrate your skin and dermis your skin. Which can cause premature aging? The uva rays can penetrate specifies of the sun. It can pass through glasses and the shades that mean that even when you are not directly exposed to the sun. you still need sunscreen protection, preferable UVB while you may think that’s blocking 93% So, while you may think that blocking 93% of the suns ray is completely blocking your chance at a tan-don’t forget that your sunscreen is being constantly worn down by sweat by sweat and clothing-some rays are absolutely still getting through. You had been surprised what a fantastic tan you can achieve by preparing your skin with a tan accelerator, then layering on an SPF before heading out. It’s why we created our new mineral sunscreen tan smart, the first sunscreen of its kind to include s tan accelerator which we call our tan boost technology, to make the most of the select protection factors, which is the indication of the efficiency of a given sunscreen. Its blocks he sun rays send will possibilities you to stay longer and more safely under the sun. When sun rays are the strongest. Pull put these sunglasses and wear them, too. That’s because ultraviolet rays can still damage your eyes. Just ask anyone who’s had cataract surgery. This is one of the reasons that you should invest in sunscreen that has both uva and UVB protection. In addition, sunscreen can help sensitive skin to stay well, protect against sunburn and sun-damaged dark spots, and wrinkles.

How to Use a Sunscreen for Tanning:

In order to tan without burning, you need to apply enough sunscreen daily.

Imagine the typical eight-ounce bottle of suntan lotion. It will remove your tanning better.

That’s why purchasing more than one bottle at a time is smart.

Put about a teaspoon on each arm and leg, at least two on your torso (front and back), and one on your face and neck will pack your tanning.

Next, remember to reapply every two hours, or when you get out of the water and towel off will dry and rinse your skin. This is where you need to experiment.

Do you know how long it takes you to burn?

For example, light-skinned people might develop sunburn within fifteen to thirty minutes in the sun it is the main reason for tanning.

If you put on a tanning oil with spf4, you will have four times that long to enjoy the sunshine before burning.

A small number of rays will still penetrate your skin to cause melanin production and give you a tan.

This is more likely if it’s not a broad-spectrum sunscreen that only blocks UVB, not UVA.

Keep in mind, that sunscreen doesn’t block a hundred percent of the ultraviolet radiation.

That’s why tanning with sunscreen works a lot.

Therefore, put on the sunscreen and layout for fifteen minutes if you have fair-skinned.

Flip over and wait for another fifteen. Then go inside and check your skin and analyses the difference.

Even with a sunscreen, don’t stay out longer than an hour total that very first time.

You might not notice any redness or difference until the evening suits you.

Which SPF Is Best for Tanning?

I also mentioned a moment ago that sunscreen without uva and UVB protection are more likely to help you tan. UVB radiations are what causes burns and skin cancer. Meanwhile, uva leads to more pigment productions but is linked to age-related skin damaged like wrinkles. Basically, for tanning purpose, use the lowest SPF you can, but limits your time outdoors accordingly. If you are concerned about the unpredictable results of tanning outside, build up a base tan by tanning indoors. Get one the best tanning lotions for fair skin to help you begin? Don’t forget your scalp can get burn. Wear a hat, or spend some time in the shade. There are easier ways to get highlights in your hairs. If you are pale, to begin with, don’t try tanning with spf4. Once, you have got a little color, you can drop the sun protection factors to a lower number. If you go on vacation o someplace closer to the equator then where you live. Choose a strong sunscreen. What kept you from burning in the high latitude might be enough where the sun us the more intense. The same is true if you go up into the mountain. Even, skiers wear sunscreen because snow a swatter reflects rays. Simply put, the best sunscreen is the one you and your kids will actually use! We recommend finding one you love and sticking with it. Aside from the brands or SPF level, there are two types of sunscreens. One with chemical and other is minerals active ingredients.

Chemical Sunscreen:

Chemical sunscreen is also like a type of you are familiar with already. They absorb the harmful ultraviolet rays before they reach your skin. While these lotions and sprays are easier to apply with into the white residue, you will need a reapply more often than you would with a physical option.

Mineral Sunscreen:

Is also called the chemical formulas. Leave with a white cast, but usually last longer than Mineral sunscreen chemical formulas. Is also called the physical sunscreen. Form a barrier on your skin that reflects or filters ultraviolet rays. He dispersed zinc oxide and titanium dioxide formulas can be more difficult to spread on your skin.

Must Read: Top 24 Best Salicylic Acid Face Washes & Gentle Cleansers 2020

Must Read: Top 22 Best BB Cream For Oily Skin In 2020

Use sunscreen with an SPF of 30:

Always wear a sunscreen with broad-spectrum UV protection of at least 30 SPF. Never use a tanning oil that does not contain sun protection. Be sure to apply sunscreen within 20 minutes of being outside. An SPF 30 is enough to block uva and UVB rays, but not so strong that you won’t get tan. Cover your body in at least a full ounce of sunscreen. Change the position of frequently. This will help you avoid the burning part of your body. Eat foods that contain beta carotene. Foods like’s carrots, sweet, potatoes, and take can help you tan without burning. More research is needed. But, some studies show that beta carotene can help reduce sun sensitivity in people with photosensitive diseases. Don’t stay outside for longer than your skin can create melanin. Melanin is the pigment responsible for tanning. Everyone has melanin cut-off points, which is usually 2 to 3hours. After this amount of time, your skin will not get darker on a certain day. If you tan past that point, you will be putting your skin in harm’s way. Eat lycopene-rich food, examples include tomatoes, guava, and watermelon. A small 2011 study trusted source found that lycopene helps protects the skin naturally against UV rays. Choose you’re tanning time wisely. If your goal is to tan quickly, the sun is the typically strongest between noon and 3 pm. keep in mind, however, that while the sun is at its strongest during this time, it will do the most damage due to this exposure. If you have extremely fair skin, its best to tan in the morning after 3 pm to avoid the burning. Is likely to increase the risk of skin cancer due to this expose. If you have extremely fair skin colors. Consider wearing a strapless top. Seek shades: Taking breaks will make it less likely for you to burn, and it will give your skin break from the intense heat. Prep, before you tan preparing your skin before heading outdoors, can help your tan last longer. Try exfoliating your skin before tanning. Skin that has not been exfoliating is more likely to flake off. Using an aloe Vera after tanning may also help your tan last longer.

Risk of tanning:

Tanning and scrub thing may feel good, and even boost mood trusted source because of the exposure to vitamin D. However, tanning still has risk, especially if you forgot sunscreen risk associated with tanning includes:

Melanoma and other skin cancers

Dehydration

Sunburn

Heat rash

Premature skin aging

Eye damage

Immune system suppression

Tanning precautions:

Tanning can be made slightly safer if you do it a very short period of time, drink water, wear sunscreen, with an SPF of a least 30 on your skin and lips, and protect your eyes and avoid the sun.

Falling asleep in the sun

Wearing an SPF of less than 30

Drinking alcohol, which can be dehydrating

Don’t forget to:

Apply SPF to your scalp, the top of your feet, ears, and other places you can easily miss. Roll over the frequently so you tan evenly without burning. Drink the plenty, water, wear a hat, and protect your eyes by wearing sunglasses.

#sunglasses #spfcream #sunscreen

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