#i memtioned stuff about myself
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#a colleague#that has similar nonbinary vibes#also doesnt have great social communicaiton skills#(aka seems pretty nd)#(tho they wouldnt be the only one we have diagnosed adhd and others around too)#but my point is...#i memtioned stuff about myself#and usually people are like: huh thats weird#and i go: hahaha yup im special like that#but they basically went: you give off nd/autistic/adhd vibes#and people are used to be taping my fingernails bc i rip them up bc of my anxiety and all#but i was asked about it the other day again and they asked me fidget/stim toys help me#and i was like yeah sometimes depends on the toy#that was last week#today they handed me a gift#a little box of fidget toys!!#and look#i HATE gifts#loatje them like nothing else#i get this pit of dread in my stomach and i can barely control my reaction like i cant even asct excited#i have no idea how to react#im like ....uh why#but then when i saw the box i actually got excited#and rn im too tired for feelinggs again#no time for feelings#but ofc i had to try them all out#and its like#damn#who wouldve thought#ignore me
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