#i mean the chemistry was extreme in every little moment

[the-jam-to-the-unicorn]

The ass grab The back rub Meeting Nauseda and his wife

THE moment

[waitimcomingtoo]

A Film By Peter Parker

Pairing: Peter Parker x Reader

Synopsis: Peter gets back into making little videos once the two of you start hanging out

warning: extreme 2017 homecoming era nostalgia

Masterlist

Of course he went for Liz.

Liz was the ingénue. She was perfect in every possible way. Perfect grades, perfect face, and the perfect boy pining after her. You’d been crushing on Peter since the third grade but with Liz around, he never noticed you.

But Liz was gone now. She had moved to Oregon following her dad’s arrest and taken Peter’s feelings for her with her. Now that she was gone, you decided it was time to stop pining after Peter from afar and start pining from up close. And so, when you walked into the cafeteria that day, you didn’t sit at the end of the table like you usually did.

“Oh, hey.” Peter smiled in surprise when you sat down next to him. Smiling was good. Smiling meant he wasn’t creeped out by you sitting so close. You gulped before giving him best smile back.

“Hi.”

“What are you doing here?” Ned asked, making Peter give him a look. You immediately regretted your decision and wished you’d just stayed in your usual spot.

“What do you mean? She always sits with us.” Peter pointed out.

“No, she always sits down there. She’s never actually sat with us before.” Ned replied and gestured to the end of the lunch table.

“Yes, but I’m sitting here today because I needed Peters help with the chemistry homework.” You said and put your chemistry notebook on the table. You knew you couldn’t just randomly sit with them without a reason, so you came prepared.

“Oh, for Mr. Eddie’s class? It’s easy. I’ll show you my notes.” Peter’s offered with a smile. You returned the smile as he pulled out his own notebook. It was a win/win for you since you actually needed help with the homework and it would start a conversation with Peter. While he was explaining the problem to you, you never once looked down at the notebook. You were too focused on the curve of Peter’s suspiciously long eyelashes, the longest you’d ever seen on a boy. Ned noticed the way you were staring his his best friend and frowned a little.

“Does that make sense?” Peter’s asked when he was done explaining.

“Yeah, it does. Wow, thanks Peter. It sounds so easy the way you explain it. I wish this stuff came as naturally to me as it does for you. You’re so smart.” You said as if you had listened to a single word he had said.

“That’s nice of you to say but I’m really not that smart. I just like chemistry.” He replied as he blushed from the compliment.

“Oh, come on. You’re the smartest guy I know. You’re the only one that answers questions in that class. And you always get them right. When Mr. Eddie asks if anyone has any questions, I don’t raise my hand because I don’t even know what I’m confused about yet.”

“That’s I feel in English. I can barely make it through the first line in a poem and you’re already going back and forth with Ms. Teague about Pindaric odes or whatever they’re called.”

“You listen to when I talk in English?” You asked with a soft smile.

“Of course I do.” Peter shrugged. “I always find the reading boring until you raise your hand and talk about how you interpreted it. You make it interesting.”

“I liked that book we read when the kids ate the other kids.” Ned said and interrupted the moment. Your smile dropped as you and Peter looked at him with disgust.

“The one with the flies-“

“We know.” Peter cut him off.

“Anyways, thank you for helping me with the homework. I’ve been stuck on it all week.” You said to Peter.

“Ugh. That’s been me with my paper for Mrs. Teagues class. And it’s due tomorrow.” Peter groaned.

“Oh, the analysis essay? I could help you with that.” You offered.

“Really? You’d help me?” Peter smiled in surprise.

“Yeah. I already wrote mine. It would be no problem.”

Ned was watching this back and forth conversation for a while until it clicked it in head. He gasped and slapped the table, making you and Peter look at him.

“Oh my God.” Ned said. “That’s why you’re sitting here. You have a-“

“Can I talk to you for a second, Ned?” You quickly cut him off when you realized where that sentence was going. Before Ned could even answer, you grabbed his arm and pulled him outside the cafeteria to talk in private.

“You like Peter!” Ned whispered harshly. You clamped your hand over his mouth and pushed him up against the wall.

“You need to keep your mouth shut.” You hissed. “Yes, I like Peter, okay? I’ve had a crush on Peter since middle school. He never noticed me when Liz was around but now that she’s in Oregon, I might finally have my chance. I don’t want to scare him off so just keep your mouth shut and let me handle this.”

You took your hand off Ned’s mouth and he started to gasp for air.

“Oh, please. Your nose wasn’t covered. You could breathe just fine.” You said with a roll of your eyes. Ned stopped pretended and straightened up.

“So you actually like Peter? For his personality?”

“Yes. Is that so hard to believe?”

“Kinda, yeah.” Ned admitted.

“I like everything about him. And I’m gonna tell him that. Just please, don’t say anything before I do. I’ll tell him when I’m ready.”

“Are you going to cast a love spell on him using a lock of his hair?” Ned whispered to you.

“What? No. Why would you even ask me that?”

“Because you’re a witch.” Ned said like it was obvious.

“I’m not a witch.” You groaned. “I just accidentally cackled that one time but it was only because I had phlegm in my throat.”

“Then about that time on the bus?”

“We’ve been over this. It was just a coincidence that that biker fell off his bike after I gestured with my hand. I didn’t move him with my mind.”

“And that one time in physics?” Ned narrowed his eyes.

“I still don’t know how that guys shirt caught on fire.” You shrugged. “It’s a mystery to me.”

“It caught on fire after he made fun of you for being a witch.” Ned pointed out.

“Maybe he was just standing too close to the flame.” You shrugged.

“He was standing in the doorway. There was no flame.” Ned reminded you.

“The magic of science.” You shrugged again.

“But what about that time-“

“Don’t bring up the nosebleed.” You whined.

“I am gonna bring up the nosebleed.” Ned hissed. “In sixth grade, our Spanish teacher got a nosebleed right after he told you to stop staring out the window and made everyone laugh at you. How do you explain that?”

“You’ve made your point, okay? Now are you gonna tell Peter or not?”

“Look, I’m not gonna expose your gross secret feelings, as gross and secret as they may be.” Ned sighed. “But Peter is still my best friend so I have to look out for him. I don’t want any spells cast on him.”

“That’s fine. There will not be any spells.” You held your your hands in defense. Just then, Flash walked by and laughed when he saw the two of you talking.

“Woah. What is this, the friendless loser convention?” Flash snorted.

“Shut up.” You snapped. Flash immediately tripped over his feet and fell to the ground, making Ned look at you with wide eyes.

“Witch!” He whispered harshly as he pointed a finger at you.

“Shut up. Let’s go back inside.” You rolled your eyes and pulled Ned back into the cafeteria.

Later that day, you met up with Peter in the library to go over your assignments. You started with his English essay and finished that within an hour before moving on to your chemistry homework.

“You can plug the numbers into your formula now using the method I taught you. And then you just solve for x.” Peter explained as you worked out a problem together.

“Hm. You make it sound so simple.” You sighed and leaned on your hand. Peter saw the way you were staring at him in his peripheral vision and felt his face heat up.

“It’s, uh, it’s pretty easy once you get the hang of it. I never liked the way Mr. Eddie taught it. I figured this out myself and it’s worked much better for me.”

“Thanks for helping me. You’re a good teacher.” You said and put your hand on his arm. Peter laughed shyly at the contact and cleared his throat.

“Thanks. And so are you. That was the best essay I’ve ever produced. I honestly worry she won’t believe I wrote it.”

“Well if she says anything, I can vouch for you. You put in good work on this essay. You deserve the credit.” You assured him, making Peter blush all over again. It occurred to Peter that he never realized how pretty you were. You’d been classmates since 3rd grade so he always looked at you as just another girl in his class. Now that you had his full attention, he didn’t feel like looking away.

“Thanks. I appreciate you helping me write it. I know it can be frustrating to work with me because of my dyslexia.”

“It’s no problem. And it wasn’t frustrating at all.” You shrugged. Peter smiled at felt better about how long it took him to write the essay.

“Thanks.” He said. You had successfully gotten him to spend time with you one on one but now you needed to commence the next phase in your plan which was to hang out in a non school related setting.

“Would you ever want to hang out socially?” You blurted.

“Like, and not do homework?” He asked. You nodded your head and he smiled before nodding as well.

“Yeah. Sure. I’d love to.”

“Cool. Me too.” You smiled. You hadn’t meant to blurt it out like that but it worked nonetheless.

“Does this weekend work?” He asked you.

“Yeah. What do you want to do?”

Hard cut to that weekend. You were on the subway with Peter and he had his phone out to record himself.

“Firts social hang out with a girl. A film by Peter Parker.” He said in a low voice before flipping the camera to face you.

“Staring me.” You smiled and waved to the camera.

“Are you sure you’re cool with me filming this?” Peter asked as he flipped the camera back to himself.

“Yeah, of course. The other ones you showed me were so cute. But why did it seem like there were so many missing parts? You were always talking about something cool that I didn’t get to see.”

“Uhhh, no reason.” Peter said and looked to the side. He had skillfully edited out any incriminating superhero activity that you were not ready to see yet.

“Well I like it. I feel like I’m on Modern Family.” You said and posed for the camera.

“Which family member would you be?” Peter laughed and zoomed in on you. With his phone blocking his face, he could shamelessly admire your face on his screen.

“Duh. Lily.”

“I can so see that.” He chuckled. The subway lurched suddenly and you both grabbed onto the pole, coincidentally putting your hands in top of each others.

“Oh, sorry. Our hands touched.” You laughed shyly.

“Oh my God. So romantic.” Peter joked, making you blush and look into his camera.

“Stop it.” You laughed and covered his phone with your hand. He laughed as well and put his phone away.

After learn you had never been, Peter decided to the Lego Store. He’d been hyping it up to you all week over text and now that it was finally happening, he hoped it impressed you. You walked in together and Peter heard you gasp.

“Big Lego Aladdin.” You gasped and ran to stand under the giant magic carpet and Aladdin made of Legos.

“That’s the first time I’ve ever heard that string of words come out of someone’s mouth.” Peter laughed and went to stand under it with you. You looked over at him and were surprised to see he was already looking at you.

“This is even better than you described it. You need to show me everything.” You said and excitedly shook his arm.

“I can do that.” He blushed and nodded his head towards some of the sets.

Peter took out his phone to film you as you looked at everything in the store. The way you were looking around like a little kid brought a smile to Peter’s face. He zoomed in on you and caught himself staring at you fondly through the camera.

“Come on. I haven’t even showed you the coolest part yet.” Peter said and brought you over to the build your figure own station. He laughed when you gasped again and started to excitedly rummage through all the pieces. Peter didn’t bring his phone out again until you had built each other.

“Show me what you made.” He laughed from the other side of the phone.

“Looks! It’s a little Peter. He has a backpack and a beaker.” You said as you proudly showed the camera the little Peter figure you had made.

“This is Y/n. I can’t believe I found the shoes you always wear.” He said as he filmed the figure he had made of you.

“You notice my shoes?” You asked with a smile. Peter didn’t catch it because he was too busy fitting the hands of your Lego figures together.

“Look. They’re holding hands.” Peter gasped.

“Aw.” You laughed. “Us on the subway.”

“We should give them some privacy. They might not want us to hard launch their relationship.” Peter said and put his phone away.

“You’re so cute.” You laughed without thinking about it. Peter looked up at you with rosy cheeks and you gulped when you realized what you said.

“I mean-“

“Come on. I wanna take you somewhere else.” He cut you off before you could explain. He brought you to Delmar’s and ordered his usual for you to split. You sat together inside and you tried your best to remain calm. You always wondered what Peter got up to when he wasn’t at school and now you were in one of his favorite places and eating with him.

“Okay, this is Y/n’s first time eating at Delmars since he reopened. Let’s get her reaction.” Peter said as he filmed you unwrapping the sandwich.

“Wait, why is it so flat?” You laughed and held the sandwich up.

“Oh, sorry.” He chuckled. “I forgot to warn you that he always squishes it for me. But you’ll like it. Trust me. It’s much better when it’s squished down real flat.”

“Well I’m glad I now know you like your sandwiches to be squished. I would not have expected that about you.” You said and took a bite of your half before giving him a thumbs up.

“Yeah? You like it?” He asked hopefully.

“I do. Your squishy sandwich was surprisingly good.” You admitted.

“Well, I’m very pleased to hear that.” Peter smiled and phone away. “So to make it even, you have to show me one of your favorite places next time we hang out.”

“Oh.” You smiled coyly. “I didn’t realize there would be a next time.”

“There better be. I had a lot of fun with you today. How come we’ve never hung out before?”

“I don’t know. I always wanted to but you were busy running around with Ned or staring at…” You trailed off and chose not to mention Liz in case he was still hung up on her.

“It doesn’t matter. I’m just glad we’re friends now.” You said instead.

“Me too. I’ve never had a girl friend.”

“What was that?” You said and started choking on your saliva.

“All my friends in my life were guys. It’ll be nice to have a female influence in my life.”

“Oh. Girl friend.” You smiled tightly.

You hung out another hour before taking the subway back to your respective apartments. Peter walked to you the front doors of you building and you had an awkward moment where you didn’t know if you should hug or not.

“We uh, we should probably get an ending for your film.” You said with a timid smile.

“Oh, right. Thats a great idea.” Peter smiled and pulled out his phone. He pressed record and you waved to the camera with both hands.

“So, can you give our first time hanging out a rating?” He asked you.

“9/10.” You grinned and held up two thumbs.

“What? Why’d I only get a 9?” Peter scoffed and pretended to be offended.

“I had a 10/10 time but I have to deduct a point because we saw that guy cutting his hair on the subway and I was scared he was gonna throw the scissors at us.”

“Well I would’ve just protected you with my lightning fast reflexes.” Peter said simply. You smiled at him through the phone and he smiled back. He put the camera down and looked at you with a content smile on his face.

“Seriously, though. When’s the next time we’re hanging out?”

It ended up being just a few days later. And then again a few days after that.

“Peter’s first time!” You cheered as you filmed him during one of your hang outs.

“Trying boba.” He clarified. “I don’t understand this drink. Do I eat the balls?”

“Yes. Sip it slowly so they don’t all go down your throat.” You instructed. Peter took a big sip and immediately started choking.

“Peter! I said slowly!” You said as you slapped his back until he stopped choking. You quickly put the camera down to help him recover.

Your hangouts started getting more and more frequent and Peter soon considered you a best friend. Your weekends became each others and school days were often spent together in the library or at one of your apartments. You were quickly moving up the ranks in Peter’s life, just as you hoped. And the closer you got, the more Peter could not believe he had never noticed you before.

Little did you know, Peter often found himself watching the footage he had taken of you during your hang outs with a big smile on his face. He’d rewatch the videos he had taken and realize that they were slowly becoming less of a documentary and more of a highlight reel for you. He never imagined a girl as cool as you would for him so when he realized he was starting to fall for you, he quickly repressed his feelings. Little did he know, the feelings were mutual.

“Did you always make these little videos?” You asked Peter one day as he filmed you trying to balance on the curb of the sidewalk.

“I used too make them all the time but I hadn’t for awhile. I only started them again when we started hanging out.”

“Really? Why?” You wondered and stumbled off the curb.

“I don’t know. You remind me of the time before my life got crazy. It made me want to do these again.” He shrugged. You couldn’t help but smile at that information and turned around to look at him.

“So I could be the star?” You asked and posed for the camera.

“Exactly. You’re my muse.” He played along, making you laughed shyly. When he watched the video back later that night, he knew he had meant every word of that.

Peter sat in his bedroom one day and filmed himself wearing your glasses while you did homework at his desk. He looked over you every now and then just to admire the back of your head.

“Don’t break those.” You called without looking up. All you needed to hear was the sound of your glasses case opening to know what he was doing.

“I’m not even wearing your glasses.” He lied and admired himself in the camera.

“Yes you are.”

“No I’m not. But yes, I am.”

“Knew it.” You snorted.

“Hey, how come girls always smell so good?” Peter wondered. “Your hair hit me in the face when you turned too fast before it smelled like a baby in a damn meadow.”

“It’s just my womanly essence. Now can you stop looking at yourself long enough to help me with my chemistry homework?”

“It’ll be hard but I can try.” Peter dramatically sighed and set his phone down. You got yo from the desk and went over to the bed with a cheeky smile on your face.

“Incoming.” You announced and patted your elbow twice like a wrestler.

“No, don’t.” He pleaded. You ignored his pleas and jumped on top of him. He groaned and pushed you off, leaving you laying in the bed beside him.

“Ow. My ribs.”

“You’ll heal.” You rolled your eyes. “Now can you help me with number 7?”

“Oh, yeah. No problem. Can you check this email before I send it?” He asked and handed over his laptop. You handed him your worksheet before reading over his email draft.

“Oh, honey.” You grimaced just a few words into the email.

“Is it bad?”

“Good evening, Mrs. Howard. I hope this email finds you well. I’m so sorry for bothering you. I was just wondering if I could possibly have an extension on my midterm paper? No worries at all if an extension is not possible. I apologize for any inconvenience this email may have caused. Thank you for reading, Peter Parker.” You read out loud.

“What’s wrong with that?”

“After your name, you included the name of the class, the time you have it, and a description of yourself. She knows who you are!” You laughed and turned the laptop around to show him his mistakes.

“She may have forgotten.” He pointed out. “I can’t take any chances.”

“Peter, this email is way too submissive. You sound like such a bottom.”

“Well excuse me, genius.” He said sarcastically. “How would you write it?”

“Here.” You said and handed the laptop back after retyping his email.

“Oh, wow. That’s actually really good.” He said once he read your updated version.

“This is why we are such good friends. You have all the math and science knowledge in this little, beautiful head of yours-“

“Little?” He interrupted.

“You’re right. Sorry, I was just being nice. What I meant to say is that your head is huge.” You corrected. “Anyways, you have the math brain and I have the literary brain. It’s like you’re Einstein and I’m Victor Hugo.”

“Who the hell is that?” He laughed as he peaked at your mirror to see if his head was actually huge.

“The guy who wrote Les Mis.” You said like it was obvious.

“Never heard of it.”

“What? You’ve never seen Les Misérables?” You asked in a thick French accent.

“Huh?”

“We have to watch it. It’s so good.” You said and snatched his laptop back. You pulled up the movie and handed it back to him.

“Oh my God. It’s two hours and 38 minutes long? And a musical? Hell no.” Peter shook his head and pushed the laptop away.

“But it’s so good.” You urged. “We can just leave it on in the background while we work. It’s super light and easy to watch.”

“Really? What’s it about?”

“Oh, you know. Just war torn France.” You mumbled.

“No. Absolutely not.”

“But you’ll like it! There’s prostitution and con men and um…oh! And orphans! You can watch it and feel represented.” You said and shook his arm.

“I hate you.” He laughed but nearly gave in to your request just to see you happy.

“Fine.” You huffed. “I finished editing your midterm paper, by the way. You don’t actually have to send that email.”

“And here is your completed chemistry homework.” Peter smiled and handed your worksheet back.

“Aw.” You gushed. “Look at us. I love cheating with you.”

“So do I. We make a great pairing.” He chuckled as he looked over at you. You looked back at him and gulped. You hadn’t realized how close you were with your arms and legs pressed against each other as you sat together in your bed. Peter knew his sheets would smell like your perfume that night and smiled at the thought.

“Now that we’re all done with our work, you know what we should do?” He asked as he moved in closer.

“W-what should we do?” You stuttered now that he was right there.

“You know what I’ve been dying to do with you for a long, long time?” He asked.

“No. I mean, I don’t know. What?” You laughed nervously. Peter moved in even closer and right when you thought he was gonna kiss you, he reached over and grabbed his laptop back.

“I wanted to show you a real musical. Not this French miserable bull crap. Have you ever seen a little movie called Hair-“

“No. I’m not watching Hairspray with you again. You scream-sang every lyric last time and I couldn’t even hear it.” You cut him off and reached over home to take the laptop back. He pulled it away at the last second and you ended up on top of him. You looked into each others eyes and both froze in the positions you were in. Your faces were almost touching but neither of you tried to pull away. Your eyes were going back and forth between his lips and eyes and he was doing the same. Like magnets, you two started to lean towards each other but before your lips could connect, May opened the door.

“What did you guys want- oh! Sorry! I didn’t realize I would be interrupting something. My bad.” May smiled sheepishly and pretended to cover her eyes. Peter burned bright red as you quickly climbed off of him.

“May.” He said warningly.

“Sorry. But maybe lock the door next time. And use protection.”She whispered the last part before shutting the door.

“May!” He groaned and threw a pillow at the door. There was a long, awkward silence before you were even able to look at each other. When you finally did, you smiled awkwardly and kept your distance.

“That was so weird. What did she think we were doing?” You laughed nervously to break the silence.

“Psh. I know.” Peter scoffed. “She said she was interrupting but we weren’t even doing anything.”

“Yeah. What did she think? That we were gonna kiss or something?” You asked and laughed like it was the most ridiculous thing you could ever suggest.

“Us? Kissing? How silly. Imagine that.” Peter forced a laugh as well and looked to the side. The awkward silence returned and you struggled to look at each other.

“Do you think she made dinner?” Peter asked after a beat of silence.

“Let’s check.” You said and quickly got off the bed.

You didn’t discuss the almost kiss and went home shortly after. You couldn’t sleep that night because you couldn’t stop replaying the moment in your mind. No matter how much you wanted him to like you back, if Peter reciprocated your feelings, he would have kissed you.

Your pity party didn’t last long because on the subway the next day, you felt Peter put his earbud in your ear. You heard the Les Mis soundtrack playing in your ear and looked up in surprise. Peter was already filming you with a huge smile on his face.

“This guy 24601 should stop stealing bread and stick to singing. He has serious pipes.” Peter said.

“You listened to it?” You melted into a smile and held your hand over your heart.

“Yep. I stayed up all night watching lyric videos because I couldn’t understand what they were saying with their accents. It’s actually really good. I love Eponine. I just wish Marious wasn’t such an idiot. How does he not see that his best friend is clearly in love with him?” Peter asked with exasperation. You looked directly at the camera and hoped it picked up the irony before looking at Peter again.

“He’s not an idiot. He’s a romantic.” You sighed. “He doesn’t notice Eponine because he’s in love with Cosette. And course he is. She’s prettier and richer and has perfect hair. He doesn’t even see Eponine.”

“Good hair isn’t everything. Eponine is way better than Cosette.” Peter scoffed. “I’m team Eponine all the way.”

“Are you really?” You asked hopefully.

“Oh, for sure. I see why you like this stuff. These songs are awesome.” Peter said and put the other earbud in his ear. He then flipped the camera around to film the two of you sharing earbuds. As Heart Full Of Love played in your ears, you couldn’t help but longingly staring at Peter. The fact that he had stayed up late just to listen to something you suggested made you overcome with fondness for him. If he had done something like that, maybe he actually did feel the same.

“I forgot how good this album is. I haven’t listened in a while. I used to listen to it all the time back when you…” You stopped short when you realized you were about to say too much.

“When I what?” Peter wondered. You looked him in the eyes and decided that it was time to be honest. The song ended and a new, much louder one began to play in your ears.

“Back when you liked Liz. She was Cosette. I was Eponine. I was the one pining after a guy who never noticed me because he was in love with another girl. You were never mine to lose.” You admitted. Peter stared at you for a minute before pulling his earbud out.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t hear a word you just said. Master of the House is such a banger. What did you say?” He asked you.

“Never mind.” You smiled. “It wasn’t important.”

He smiled back before getting a text on his phone. You looked at his phone when you heard it buzz and realized he was still recording. In other words, he had just recorded you saying you liked him. Your eyes went wide but you only had a second to panic when you read the text he had gotten.

“Did Liz just text you?” You asked in a quiet voice. You felt like you were about to throw up. Years of crushing on a boy who liked another girl turned into months of pinning for your best friend and now turned into a rock in your stomach. Peter stopped recording the two of you to answer her text, which felt a little like a slap in the face.

“Oh, yeah. We’ve been talking lately.” He absentmindedly replied to you as he laughed at whatever she had written.

“You have?” You asked with a dry mouth.

“Yeah. She says Oregon is pretty cool. But she wants to come back and visit this summer to see everyone.” He told you.

“And see you?” You asked with a sad smile.

“I guess so.” He shrugged. “It would be nice to see her.”

“Yeah. Totally.” You said weakly. “So how long have you guys been talking?”

“I don’t know. A few weeks? She texted me a little while ago and we’ve been catching up.”

“That’s awesome.” You lied.

“I know. I didn’t think I’d ever hear from her again after she moved.”

“Neither did I.” You said through a forced smile. You needed to get off the subway and away from Peter before you started crying. So as soon as the subway doors opened, you bolted out.

“I gotta go. See you later.” You called to him before running through the subway station. You wiped tears as you went up the stairs and didn’t stop moving until you were in a bathroom stall at school. You gave yourself five minutes to be upset before drying your face and leaving the bathroom. It sucked, but it could have been worse. Now, Peter never had to know how you felt about it.

Peter was beyond confused by your exit on the subway but he wasn’t about to get any answers from you. You dodged his texts throughout the day and didn’t dare go into the lunchroom where you knew he and Ned would be.

“Y/n isn’t here yet?” Peter’s huffed as he sat down at your usual lunch table.

“Not yet. Actually, I haven’t seen your girlfriend all day.” Ned realized.

“She’s not my girlfriend.” Peter blushed. “And I’m pretty sure she’s avoiding me. She’s been so weird ever since this morning. Everything was fine on the subway until we got to school.”

“Well did anything happen on the subway that would weird her out? Oh no. Did you graze her boob with your hand again?”

“No. That was one time. And it was her boobs fault, not mine.” Peter whispered harshly. “We were just listening to music together and I was filming her like normal. But she could not get away from me faster once the doors opened. It was so weird.”

“Did you say anything weird to her? Girls don’t like it when you say weird things to them.”

“I know that. I didn’t say anything weird.” Peter replied as he pulled out his phone. He watched the video he had taken on the subway with no sound to see where he had gone wrong. All he saw was you looking at him with heart eyes which made his face heat up. But still, no evidence of where he messed up.

“I knew it. We were having a normal conversation about Les Mis and then I got a text from and then she ran. It makes no sense.”

“What was the text? Was it May saying something weird?”

“No. And stop saying weird. It doesn’t sound like a real word anymore.” Peter ordered. “And the text was just from Liz.”

“Oh shit.” Ned said when he heard this.

“What?” Peter wondered.

“Oh, Peter.” Ned sighed. “Peter, Peter, Peter.”

“What?” He asked again, annoyed now.

“Peter, Peter, Peter, Peter, Peter.”

“Are you gonna tell me what happened or just keep saying my name?”

“I can’t tell you. I’m sworn to secrecy. And I don’t want Y/n to put a hex on my family.” Ned said and held up his hands.

“Y/n swore you to secrecy? About what?”

“Can’t say.” Ned shrugged and zipped his lips.

“Does she not like Liz? And doesn’t want me to know?”

“Dude. Dude, dude, dude, dude. You are so close but so far.”

“So she does like Liz? Oh my God. Does she a crush on Liz? And she’s jealous that Liz texted me and not her?” Peter whispered with wide eyes.

“You’re getting colder.” Ned waved his hand. “I don’t even know how you got there.”

“That was all my guesses. Just tell me.” Peter whined.

“Hell no. I don’t want Y/n to curse my crops and make not grow for all of eternity.”

“You don’t have crops.” Peter pointed out.

“I could develop some.” Ned snapped.

“I just don’t understand what she would tell you something but not tell me. We’re best friends. She usually tells me everything.” Peter said right as his thumb accidentally hit the volume button on the video. Your confession to Peter on the subway was heard loud and clear by the two boys. Both of their jaws dropped as the video ended with you asked if Liz had just texted Peter.

“Well I wouldn’t have beaten around the bush like that if I knew you had video evidence of her saying she liked you right in your hands.” Ned sighed dramatically.

“I need to find her.” Peter said and ran out of the lunchroom. He looked around the school until he found you under the bleachers in the gym. You were sitting with your back against the wall and your knees drawn to your chest with your earbuds in your ears. When you saw Peter coming up to you, you quickly pulled them out.

“Hey.” He said and waved cautiously.

“Hey.” You smiled sadly as he sat beside you. You sat in silence for a minute as neither of you knew what to say.

“What’s going on with you? I haven’t seen you all day.” He started off. You looked at your hands to avoid making eye contact and sighed.

“Why didn’t you tell me you’ve been talking to Liz?” You asked quietly.

“I don’t know. I wasn’t hiding it. I just didn’t think it would interest you.”

“Well you have no idea how interesting I found it.” You laughed dryly. “What do you guys talk about anyway?”

“Well, she originally texted me to ask me to confirm I had an internship at Stark Industries because her boyfriend didn’t believe her when she told him she knew a guy who worked there. Apparently he’s been trying to get an internship there for years and he wanted to know how I landed mine. Then we just started catching up. I only talk to her here and there, though. And it’s only ever about school or work.”

“Oh. I thought you guys were talking talking.” You couldn’t help but smile a little when you heard the word “boyfriend.”

“No.” He shook his head. “Just regular talking. When you saw her text on my phone, she was telling me about her cat getting spaded. And I didn’t know what that meant so she had to tell me. I should’ve just googled it.”

You laughed softly at that and he did too. The tension was let out of the conversation and you could finally breathe again. When you stopped laughing, you finally looked in his eyes.

“Do you still have feelings for her?” You asked quietly.

“For her? No.” He laughed. “Those are long gone. I have feelings for someone else now.”

“Oh God. Don’t even tell me. I don’t want to know.” You groaned and buried your face in your hands. Peter looked at you for a minute until an idea came to him.

“Actually, uh, I came looking for you because I was just making another video. Wanna be in it?” Peter asked and took out his phone. You looked at him like he was crazy and could not believe he had just asked that during that moment.

“I’m not really in the mood right now, P.”

“Come on. I can’t make it without my muse.” He said and nudged you slightly. You couldn’t help but to smile at that and reluctantly nodded. He propped up his phone against the bleachers and pressed record.

“In a world where two best friends have no idea how to communicate despite spending way too much time together.” Peter said in a fake deep, gravely voice.

“Okay. Shade. That’s fine.”

“What will it take for them to admit they have feelings for each other?” He kept the voice as he looked at you.

“Wait, what?” You asked and looked at him with furrowed eyebrows. Peter smiled softly at you and shrugged a little.

“What’s it gonna take?” He asked again in his normal voice.

“I don’t understand.” You laughed nervously.

“I watched the video from before. From the subway. I heard what you said.” He admitted.

“Oh shit. You watched it?” You grimaced.

“Uh huh. So if you’re Eponine, I guess that makes me the idiot who didn’t realize his best friend was in love with him?”

“I guess so.” You said with a tight smile and still didn’t understand why he wanted to film this incredibly awkward conversation.

“You know, if I didn’t have a video of it, I never would have believed that you liked me.” Peter told you.

“You wouldn’t? Why not?”

“Because it doesn’t seem possible that the coolest girl I’ve ever met liked me.” He replied.

“You think I’m cool?” You asked skeptically.

“I think you’re the coolest. And you know, I watch the videos I take of you all the time. And half of them are just clips of you existing. So I do notice you. It just took me a second to catch up.” He told you. A smile tugged at your lips as you stared into his big brown eyes.

“You’re my best friend.” You told him. “I’m sorry I want more.”

“I’m not sorry.” He shrugged.

“You’re not?”

“I’m just sorry it took me so long to wake up and find that what I’ve been looking for has been here the whole time.” He said as he hooked his pinky under your chin and brought your face close to his.

“Wait, why does that sound so familiar?” You wondered.

“Don’t think about it too hard.” Peter whispered right before your lips touched. You kissed for the first time under the bleachers but it could have been in a palace for all you knew. The world disappeared around you as Peter slipped a hand behind your head to deepen the kiss. When you pulled away, you rested your foreheads together and laughed nervously together. It was a good nervous, a happy feeling of anticipation.

“Was that Taylor Swift?” You realized when you finally placed where you knew that like from.

“Shh. No.” He shook his head. “But yes, it was. You’re not the only one with good music taste.”

Tag List 🏷️

@thebookwormlife @imanativeofswlondondahling

@tom-hollands-wifey

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@imyourliquor-youremypoison @andreasworlsboring101

@peterparkoure

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@ciarahollands

@nellabellaa @pinklxmonade @boogywoogywoogy

[miguelsslvt]

punk! miguel x innocent! reader

word count: 879

TW: nsfw, smoking, hair-pulling, corruption, swearing, creampie.

request: @sukioyakio ★

A/N: this isn't edited and is poorly made so i'm so sorry. also can i just say thank you so much for over 600 notes on my first drabble?? oh my gosh?? anyways, enjoy and welcome to the club! ^^

imagine punk! miguel being the 'bad rep' of the school. in the 3rd year of college, he took physics, chemistry and spanish language. he would smoke behind the science classrooms, refuse to wear clothes that he calls 'society norms' like a blazer or a button up, and instead wear a black leather jacket with pins like 'pink floyd', or 'anarchist' all around it. he would yell, slander and mock almost every teacher whenever he's in class (which is very rare).

most of the girls honestly adored him, apart from the odd popular girl or two finding him too 'annoying' or too 'muscly' for their liking. he didn't give two shits, he already knew his body count was probably higher then their grades.

but then there's you. sweet, innocent little y/n. where most college students spent their weekends partying, you spent it in your dorm room re-reading 'moby dick' for the 6th time. you took phsycology, english literature and spanish language. and if you were completely honest, the only reason you chose spanish language is because your boyfriend at the time (now ex) was spanish. god, did you regret picking it for him.

you noticed miguel, like every other person in the school would. but your first time was different. you were running late, extremely late for your first class of the day. damn you, alarm. that's when you noticed miguel, outside science block, groaning.

despite being late, you took a curious peek at what the man was groaning about.

'stupid fucking lighter..' he mumbled, trying to light his cigarette, but failing. you knew better then to interfere, to even speak to the most intimidating man in college. but, for some reason, you ended up giving him your lighter.

'thanks, you smoke? i can give you one for a trade.' miguel said, as you smiled so sweetly. you explained how you didn't smoke, or did anything like that, and that you only carried a lighter 'just in case of emergencies'.

that's when miguel's interest in you piqued. you were such a sweet, innocent girl, and that drove something in him. something that he didn't realise he wanted. he usually only went for girls with his taste and style, girls he'd meet at festivals or clubs and were either high as heck or sexy goths. but you, you were different.

soon enough, he realised you were only in his spanish language classes, and that you weren't the best at it. perfect. your weakness was miguel's strength.

that's how you ended up in this situation. bent over miguell's desk in his dorm, mumbling his name as hee proceeded to sbuse his way into your sweet cunt.

'you want to tutor me..? that would be so nice miguel!' you had said so excitedly, there was a spanish exam coming up and miguel so kindly offered to tutor you the friday night. and being so naive and quite desperate for the help, you happily accepted.

his room was filled with different posters and signs like his favourite bands, anarchistic posters, stickers saying things like 'fuck the government!'. his leather jacket was discarded somewhere on the messy floor, as his hands grasped your hips to push you even deeper onto his cock.

'm-miguel.. m-miguel please!' you whined, your mascara running down your face.

he just chuckled, as he pulled your hair lightly, moving you onto the bed as he laid you down on your back, as he started bullying into your pussy once again. he was so mean.

your light blue dress was somewhere on the floor, ripped to shreds. it was your favourite dress, but you had other things to think about at the moment.

'yeah.. you like that, cariño? you like being fucked like a slut? not used to being so used, are you?' miguel teased, as you just moaned in response. he hadn't realised that fucking a cute little angel could be this enticing. fuck, he could get used to this.

'i.. miguel! i-i've never-' 'shh.. i know, i know, a sweet girl like you hasn't ever been treated this way.. i'm sorry for being so rough, but i dunno.. the way you're tightening around me suggests you like the harshness..' he said, his hand wiping your mascara-smudged cheeks. your body was submitting to him in every way possible, and he felt like a starved predator being fed for the first time in years.

'i-is it normal to feel l-like this..?' you whimpered, eyes shut from the pleasure. 'yes.. yes my sweet girl it's very normal to feel like this.. let me give you all the pleasure you've missed out on.' miguel whispered in your ear, as he started thrusting faster and faster, pushing you over to the edge.

you let out a loud moan, your back arching as you came. the way you clenched onto him drove miguel over the edge too. his thrusts became erratic and sloppy, as he let out one more groan as he came deep inside you.

you were panting, your eyes still shut. he pulled out slowly, placing a sweet kiss on your temple. 'god you're so cute..' miguel whispered to you, as you just whimpered in response. he chuckled deeply.

god, he might just get addicted to such a good innocent little thing like you.

♡︎♥︎♡︎♥︎♡︎♥︎♡︎♥︎♡︎♥︎♡︎♥︎♡︎♥︎♡︎♥︎♡︎♥︎♡︎♥︎♡︎♥︎♡︎♥︎♡︎

[absolutebl]

Best & Worst BLs of 2023

My Top 15 BLs of 2023 are (in order)

1 Our Dating Sim

Korea Viki

Nerds in love, deadlines, gaming, teasing, pining tiny idiots, casual affection, linguistic oops, ADORABLE. If you haven't watched this, it's a must. A perfect short form KBL, an office set reunion romance featuring geeks that really suits 8 eps with no fluff and no chaff. Just comforting and yummy.

I adored every aspect from the casting to the pristinely simple premise to the quietly smooth execution. Sure it’s low stakes, but that makes it high domesticity and extremely warm and gentle. This is a fuzzy blanket of a story - a cozy BL. It lives in my rewatch pile and you know what’s best about it? Every single episode is in that pile. There’s no skipping with this one, it might be good natured and calmly sweet but it’s tight and the pacing is excellent.

Also recieves my 2023 award for best giggle.

2 I Cannot Reach You

AKA I Can't Reach You AKA Kimi ni wa Todokanai

Japan Netflix

This classic friends-to-lovers BL is everything Japan does best. Angsty. Emo. Aching. Driven by real thirst. Yamato is deeply in love with his childhood bestie, Kakeru, and has been for ages, unable to hide his ungainly damaging high school need. He wants Kakeru in every way possible and it oozes off of the screen.

Kakeru is silly and a little simple, but not frenetic or overly camp about it. He is earnest, and genuinely wants to keep Yamato in his life which means giving a romance (and gayness) a fair chance. We watch him realize his affection and what form it can take in a truly authentic way.

This show was impossibly kind to both of its lead characters and I felt almost honored that I got to watch something so lovely and rare play out on my screen.

Also wins the best thirst award.

These were the 2 BLs that got 10/10 from me in 2023. The rest of these got 9/10 from me.

3 My School President

Thailand YouTube

GMMTV gave us a classic high school set Thai BL with tropes like messy boys singing their feelings that made this one Love Sick for the modern age with all the gentle sweetness and pining ache, but none of the dated damaging tropes or issues. Who let my BL be this wholesome and funny? My favourite GMMTV BL offering to date. And yes, I've watched them ALL.

Received the Namgoong award for best wingman 2023.

4 I Feel You Linger in the Air

Thailand grey

IFYLITA is an exquisite BL, from filming techniques to narrative framework. Steeped in history and family drama this is an elegant and classy BL. The main couple (both as a pair and individuals) were excellent, particularly Bright (Yai) whose eye-work acting style is a personal favorite of mine. It's a marker of how great it was that it's so high on my list despite the ending which was very much not what I wanted.

Additional accolade, sexiest moment of 2023 - (the oil scene).

You could try to fight me, but you'll have no grip.

5 Kiseki: Dear to Me

Taiwan Gaga & Viki

The plot is totally ridiculous and slightly unhinged. There’s a gum-ball machine of cameos, elder gay rep, great chemistry from all pairs (everyone is queer), and a KILLER side couple. It involves all the tropes under a very offhand framework of gay mafia gangs + food = love. As a result Kiseki is a poster child for Taiwanese BL, and I happen to love Taiwanese BL. Bonus? They also managed to END IT WELL, which we cannot expect from Taiwan.

Best side couple 2023!

(thank goodness Taiwan made this list!)

6 Jun and Jun

Korea Viki

A delightful office romance about an ex-idol who joins cubical life only to find his new boss is his first love. With a snappy (sometimes even raunchy) script, enjoyable sides, a pretty as peaches cast, and descent chemistry this show made up for in style what it lacked in substance. I like fluff. I loved this. I smiled every moment I was watching.

Best flirting 2023.

AKA "the tongue knows" award

7 The Eighth Sense

Korea Viki

This one is a bit chewy and sticky and less perfect than most KBLs. It’s got a bit of an age gap, country boy/city boy, stellar acting, complex characters, and leads with great chemistry and tension. This isn’t in the KBL bubble, there’s sharp edges and lots of triggers. For a BL the darkness of the content left me feeling unsettled (which is the only reason it didn't get a perfect score) but it has a glorious ending and that counts for a lot.

2023's most likely to appeal to non-BL watchers.

8 Unintentional Love Story

Korea iQIYI

The lead, Gongchan (maknae of B1A4) is a fucking GIFT, who carried this show. He was luminous with extraordinarily expressive eyes, which he used to carry a killer plot and challenging role. Forced into a totally understandable betrayal, falling in love despite himself, put into a corner he can't get out of, the AGONY, the eyes EMOTING at us in PAIN. Driven by external conflict, social tension and pressure this story seems simple but it's actually refined and quite complex. I loved this show.

Best story structure 2023.

9 My Personal Weatherman

AKA Taikan Yoho

Japan Gaga

This is classic yaoi of the kind that really only works from Japan. Basically: boys who fell in love in college end up living together but both are so repressed they actually don't realize they're in love. It's high heat is well done, but it leaned into the "why don't they just talk for fuck's sake?" which is exacerbated by the fact that they're already fucking. Sure is sexy tho.

Best use of props 2023 for the shower of sheets.

10 Our Dining Table

AKA Bokura no Shokutaku

Japan Gaga

Lonely salaryman and talented cook gets accidentally adopted by a college kid and his little brother. It’s a quiet & cozy little parable of found family alleviating loneliness. It's lovely & sweet with the romance beats used to build a family relationship, not just couple intimacy. Special.

First prize for domesticity.

11 Laws of Attraction

Thailand iQIYI

This is a great gay suspense thriller with several solid couples, fun plot, killer characters, queer rep, and a happy ending. It’s tons of fun and I had an absolute blast watching it.

Charn wins my favorite character of 2023.

12 La Pluie

Thailand Viki

This BL takes to task the fated mates trope and what it means to have love chained intimately to predestination. It’s about how faith in destiny before choice diminishes the authenticity of emotion, relationships, and connection. This is a high concept to examine through the lens of a BL. With good chemistry and decent acting all around, plus some excellent high heat and representation of consent and a few other rare tropes, this one has to (like it’s sibling show My Ride) earn high marks.

Most interesting concept 2023.

13 The New Employee

Korea Viki

So good, SO QUEER, so soft, a near pitch perfect office BL with conflict derived from that setting. Also found family and a lesbian bestie. This is what I wanted from this new crop of office set KBLs ALL ALONG. Rainbow rice cakes forever!

Best overall queer rep from Korea.

14 Step By Step

Thailand Gaga & YouTube & Viki

This was Thailand’s answer to The New Employee, and everything I loved about that show I loved about this one. This was an office romance between stern boss and sweet subordinate that felt more authentic to an office environment than previous Thai BLs of this ilk which added tension to the narrative and character development.

Chot wins best queer character 2023.

15 Love Tractor

Korea iQIYI

Most of this country-set BL had me feral for the beautiful broken city boy and his hot young farmer. Hyung romance, puppy/cat pairing, open frankness meets jaded reserve, language play, water hose frolicking, only one bed = all my favorite silly tropes.

Biggest "he so pretty" gasp of the year award.

10 Worst BLs of 2023 (that I watched)

My Blessing

My Universe: Casanova Begins

Boyband the series

Cafe In Love

Chains of Heart

Hit Bite Love

Only Friends

Senior Love Me

The Luminous Solution

The Promise

Yes, you read that right. I know I'm against the flow but I really did not like Only Friends. Everyone's taste is different.

However I DNFed faster and more BL's this year than ever before, so that means my 10 worst probably aren't quite reflective...

10 Probably Actually Worst BLs (I dropped 'em)

My Story

The Day I Loved You

Beyond the Star

Crazy Handsome Rich

Dinosaur Love

House of Stars

Mr Cinderella 2

Love Bill

Stormy Honeymoon

The Star Always Follow You

Codicils in General

I only carefully track/watch Thailand, Taiwan, Korea, and Japan. Other countries are not fully represented.

My Numbers

So my spreadsheet chronicled 138 BLs that finish airing in 2023.

101 = watched & reviewed

2 = still in the docket (WDYEY2 & Love Syndrome III)

15 = CNF (could not find)

20 = DNF (which also accounts for how few very low scores I handed out in 2023 as opposed to previous years, I just stopped watching). Speaking of which...

Ratings spread

(# of stars. #of BLs given that rating)

0 (see the DNFs instead)

2 - IT'S DEPRESSING they killed the gay, save yourself

7 - I DON'T KNOW WHAT I AM WATCHING AND NEITHER DOES IT

7 - FATALLY FLAWED but still basically BL, however… do we want to support this kind of behavior?

9 - WATCH IF YOU HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO but don’t expect much, it’s a total hot mess

17 - WORTH WATCHING BUT FLAWED probably around the ending or in narrative structure/cohesion or censorship

14 - RECOMMENDED WITH RESERVATIONS i.e. isn’t quite BL, convoluted, not strictly HEA, too short/long, or chemistry issues

30 - RECOMMENDED some concerns around tropes (like dub con) or story structure but still satisfies as BL

13 - ABSOLUTELY RECOMMENDED probably a few pacing issues or one flaw

2 - HIGHLY RECOMMENDED faithful to tropes, happy ending, good chemistry, few flaws, high rewatch potential

(source)

[wandasreallover]

The Assistant|elizabeth Olsen

Warnings:none, kinda mean lizzie tho

Elizabeth has had a lot of things on her plate lately but still refuses her need for an assistant. She was running herself into the ground between projects and overall management of her career. Eventually, Her sisters, tired of watching lizzie destroy herself take it upon themselves to hire her an Assistant despite her protests. It took them a while but they wanted only the best, which is how they found you. you are one of the best celebrity assistants out there. Anyone that you have worked for has had nothing bad to say regarding your work ethic.

At first lizzie treats you like shit riddiculing every little thing from the way you dress to the way you do your job in general. She was too proud to admit she needed help so she had to find a way to make you quit but it wasn't working, it only seemed to make you work harder.

Eventually, she learns to co exist with you and slowly comes to realisation of how much you actually do for her with little to no breaks. As time went by she found herself how staring at you throughout the day. She also took note of the way your cheeks would flush everytime she gave you even the slightest of praise or compliment. She found herself growing more fond of you as the days past which eventually lead her to make the decision to break the tension in your relationship.

It had been a particularly hectic day, Elizabeth called you into her office to go over some important documents. As you were sitting across from her, the tension in the room was palpable. She couldn't keep her eyes off of you and you couldn't help but get flustered under her gaze. She leaned forward and placed her hand on top of yours,noticing you squirm as she did so, causing you to look up at her in surprise. Her eyes softened as she spoke an almost guilty look on her face.

'I just wanted to thank you for everything you do for me. I know I haven't been the easiest to work with, but you've stuck by me through it all. I don't know what I would do without you,' she said sincerely.

You couldn't help but feel touched by her words. Despite her initial coldness towards you, you had grown to admire and respect Elizabeth for her hard work and talent.while also developing a small crush on her.

'It's my pleasure, Elizabeth. I'm just happy to be a part of your team,' you replied with a smile.

She smiled back at you, her hand still resting on yours. You couldn't deny the chemistry between the two of you, but you knew it was inappropriate to act on it and professionalism is something you pride yourself on. Something that stemmed from the extreme academic validation you craved throughout your highschool school experience.

the days went by and Elizabeth became more and more open with you, confiding in you about her personal life and even inviting you out for drinks after work. You found yourself falling for her even more, but you were hesitant to make a move too scared to taint your reputation of perfection.

One evening, after a few too many drinks, Elizabeth leaned in and whispered in your ear, 'I have a confession to make. I've had feelings for you for a while now.'

Your heart skipped a beat as you looked into her eyes, seeing the sincerity and vulnerability in them. She slowly began to lean in and despite your voice of reason telling you not to you followed her lead and kissed her back, the sexual tension and longing between you finally released.

From that moment on, your relationship with Elizabeth changed. You were no longer just her assistant, but her partner in both work and life. And as her career continued to skyrocket, you were right there by her side, supporting her every step of the way.

Working for Elizabeth had its challenges, but you wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. You had found love in the most unexpected place, and you were grateful for every moment you got to spend with her.

[marksmelodies]

for better, for worse

idol chenle x fem reader

genre: angst, smut, fluff

warnings: cussing, mentions of sex, unprotected sex,

—————————————————————————

you and chenle have been fighting a lot lately, everything you say to eachother ends up in a argument. it’s a never ending saga of screaming, fighting, threatening to break up, making up, having sex, then fighting again and so on.you currently were staring at the clock on the wall as chenle was thrusting in and out of you, wishing was that it would be over soon.you love chenle and you love your sex life with him but recently it seemed like a sympathy card and nothing more.the two of you used to have so much chemistry, your sex was amazing, you two were so passionately in love, but now you both seemed burnt out.

chenle was chasing his orgasm, thrusts were becoming rushed and messy, headboard smashing against the wall, it seemed as if he was just eager to blow off steam rather than actually wanting to have sex with you.the two of you fought earlier due to chenle blowing you off again for work, you tried your best to be understanding of his job, you knew how much it consumes his life, but when he’s blowing you off every single day it’s really hard to justify it, selfishly you wanted him to focus on you more than work.when you brought it up to him he got defensive and started yelling, which caused you to get angry and the whole situation escalated very quick leading to screaming, cussing and slamming doors.

you looked at him and wondered if you two would ever go back to how you used to.once he finished he laid down back facing you not saying a word, the next thing you know you hear soft snores coming from him.you walked to the bathroom and turned the shower on, feeling a little sore from chenle taking out his anger on you.

as the water hit your back, you begin to sob, knowing the love of your life is slipping away was the worst feeling in the entire world. you wouldn’t blame him though, your relationship had become extremely toxic.a few moments of you crying you hear the bathroom door open.

“ i’m coming in i have to piss” you hear chenle say softly

you quickly get ahold of yourself “ go ahead ” you respond your voice shaking a little.silence fell between you two for a few moments until he speaks up.

“ it’s because of me right”

“ what”

“ your crying that hard over me… over us” you go silent again not knowing what to say, that’s when chenle steps in the shower fully clothed saying nothing, just grabbing you pulling you into a hug.you take a minute to process what’s happening you feel the man in your arms start to shake before hearing him wail, in all of the years you’ve been together you have never once seen him cry so hard.you both stand in the shower with the water running embracing eachother as you two sob.he finally looks up at you with red eyes and quivering lips

“ please don’t leave me” he cried into your shoulder

“ shhh baby everything’s going to be okay”

“ but it’s not, it’s not y/n and i don’t know how to fix it”

you both soak in this very vulnerable moment and decide to sit down and have a conversation when you were done.

“ first of all chenle i’m not leaving you, i don’t know where you got that from but when i promised you forever i meant it”

“ second of all, i think we need to go to couples therapy” you say to him. he just stared at you

“ i think it’ll help, really, a friend of mine recommended me a good therapist. i’m going to fight for us chenle and i’ll do whatever it takes”

“ me too, i’ll go if that’s what you think will help”

“ i really do babe, i think it’ll help a lot” that night you two were making some sort of progress even though it doesn’t mean much because you knew at some point you two would regress and go back to square one but you had a glimpse of hope this time.instead of spending the night at your friends place avoiding chenle which would usually happen around this time of night.you lay cuddled on the couch watching a movie, you can feel chenle shifting as if he was uncomfortable.you got up to get him some water, when you came back chenle was standing up looking a little frantic.you were confused until you saw the tent in his pants.

“ really lele” you roll your eyes

“ you can never keep it in your pants” you laugh to yourself.

“ i’m sorry babe it just happens, i’ll go take care of it in the bathroom i’ll be right back” he says at you frown at him.

“ i mean you could do that or i don’t know you have your turned on girlfriend standing right in front of you” you smirk,he walks over to you picking you up making his way to the bedroom.throwing you down on the bed, immediately smashing his lips onto yours, grinding his clothed dick onto you as you moan into his lips, driving him crazy.

“ fuck i cant take it anymore” he rips your shirt and shorts off, taking your under garments with it too, leaving you completely naked.kissing a trail down your body he lifts your hips up a little to make you comfortable as he licks a stripe down your pussy

“ oh my god chenle” you moan, he smiles at you before diving completely into your heat, sucking at your clit you arch your back, lacing your fingers into his hair he pulls you forward flicking his tongue back and forth.you feel your orgasm building up, “ babe i’m coming” you scream as you release all over his face.you lay there catching your breath, for the first time in a very long time you felt content in the bedroom, for the first time in months he actually made you finish.chenle takes one if your legs lifting it onto his shoulder as he places his other hand on your waist, thrusting into you “ oh my god babe you’re so wet for me” he says as your hands grip the bedsheets, he flips you around arching your back for him he slams into you again with no warning, earning screams from you.continuously hitting your g spot you feel yourself about to cum again

“ chenle im gonna cum” you cry

“ wait for a little longer babe i want to come together”chenle has you a squirming mess under him, he has to keep one hand on your lower back keeping you arched as the other one is on your waist.

“ lele i cant hold it anymore please” is you beg

“ be a good girl y/n, i’m almost there” squeezing your eyes shut he turns you around again

“ look at me baby i wanna see you when we cum” chenle takes both of your legs bending them into your chest as he thrusts as hard as he can,his trusts become sloppy as he lets low groans out of his mouth.

“ fuck baby you ready” he asks

“ yes yes please”

“ cum for me babygirl” he demands as you both finish at the same time.chenle collapses onto you, not taking himself out of you yet.

“ fuck baby that was so good” he whispers kissing your neck

“ that’s the best sex we’ve had in so long” you smile

“ i know love, we definitely needed that”taking himself out of you he cleans you up and joins you back in bed.

“ i love you so much sweet girl, i promise we will make it through this rough patch” he kisses your forehead.

“ i know we will lele, i love you too”

** a year later**

you and chenle did end up going to couples therapy and it has changed your relationship for the better.you two haven’t gotten into fights since, you are in the honeymoon stage all over again, and let’s just say you two can’t stay off of eachother, you feel like teenagers again.the romance has sparked in your relationship again and it has never felt better.

you were currently joining him on his europe leg of his tour. waking up next to your man every morning in a new place had been a dream come true.today you were in paris , chenle had soundcheck and dance practice but other than that you had the night to yourselves since his show wasn’t until tomorrow.you stayed in bed most of the day catching up on rest until you receive a text from your boyfriend telling you he made dinner reservations tonight and to dress fancy.

you quickly got up and started getting ready.a few hours later you were finally ready as chenle made his way to pick you up.he was dressed in a nice white button down shirt and black slack pants, it took everything in you not to jump his bones right then are there.

the night was beautiful, he rented out the rooftop of a very fancy restaurant looking out onto the Eiffel Tower which shimmered every so often and had music playing soft instrumentals.you were left speechless.chenle however seemed a little nervous and quieter than usual.

finishing up your dinner you looked to your boyfriend.

“ chenle this is amazing really, thank you so much”

“ you deserve everything and more my love” he kisses your hand. you smile at him as he falls quiet again.he clears his throat.

“ let’s go look at the view huh” he suggests. he walks with you hand in hand as he leads you over to the edge of the rooftop.standing under a beautiful arch with vines and fairy lights you look at the Eiffel Tower in awe.

“ it’s so beautiful chenle, i’m never going to forget this moment” you turn to him and notice he’s not beside you anymore.confused you turn around to find him kneeling down on one knee holding out a small box with a beautiful diamond ring in it.

you gasp covering your mouth with your hands as tears stream down your cheeks.

“ y/n i have loved you from the moment i met you, never in my lifetime have i experienced a love greater than yours, we’ve been through so much together, i know that we can face whatever the world throws at us as long as we are together, i love you more than words can describe you have my whole heart, you have changed my life and i will forever be so grateful, through good seasons and bad i will always be by your side, i can not wait for our future together. (your full name) will you marry me?”

“ yes a million times yes” you say without hesitation as he slides the ring onto your finger pulling you into a kiss. you wrap your arms around his neck embracing him tightly.

“ i know we already promised forever a long time ago but i thought a big shiny ring would be a nice touch” chenle jokes as he kisses you again.

“ i cant wait to spend the rest of my life with you zhong chenle.”

—————————————————————————thank you for reading, i hope you enjoy!!!

[livingfandomly]

Currently about to finish S9 in SPN. Now, the thing is, I’ve always been very much concerned about why people shipped Dean and Cas together (not even gonna talk about shipping Sam and Dean coz just NO) and right now I’m having a very hard time denying that y’all may be right….

I’ve always seen Dean as an extremely hetero character, I mean that man has needed sex more than oxygen for a lot of the seasons HOWEVER.. one, that sex has simmered down. And two, his relationship with Cas is obviously different from Sam’s relationship with Cas. Sam and Cas feel like brothers/friends who care about each other to the point that they’d die for one another. Cas and Dean????? They do NOT feel like brothers. Best friends, maybe. But there’s just an underlying current that makes their relation so much… more??

There’s also these little niblets of moments where the interactions between them move so far beyond simple friendship and into love. I mean, the fact that when Naomi was training/brainwashing Cas she made him kill ONLY Dean. Literally hundreds of times. And yet, when it came down to it he couldn’t do it. And Dean was literally just like “I’m not fighting you. Kill me if that’s what it’s gotta be”. Very normal behaviour.

Plus, right now Cas called Sam and Dean to talk about angels getting the choice to join Metatron or die and called them to help track Gadreel. Fully normal conversation going on between Cas and Sam until Dean said something and Cas’s whole face relaxes, he forgets his conversation with Sam and literally just sighs out “hi Dean” AND AND Dean looks at Sam and Sam gives Dean a whole side eye and Dean goes “hi Cas” right in the middle of a fucking conversation both these sighing idiots just felt like they HAD TO acknowledge each other????????

Plus. When Cas found out about Dean’s mark he was so fucking concerned. Boy looked like he wanted to cry??

Anyway…. I don’t know if the writers started playing into this just because the fandom clubbed the two together or because it was always there and I was blind. But I do find myself wishing that if the writers were playing into the whole Destiel thing, that they actually went for it. Because Misha and Jensen’s chemistry is insane.

(Side note: I really shouldn’t but I love Crowley too now. Love how Dean just adopts every misfit/outsider irrespective of age or gender.)

[kali-chaotic-neutral]

Advice

Pick a cat and get some much needed advice

This will include:

~Advice you might need ~Something you have to hear ~Insight on something

Disclaimer: this is just for entertainment purposes, and as a pick-a-card reading it may not resonate for everyone. Take what you resonate with, leave what you don't.

Please do not hesitate to suggest a few PAC reading topics as I am struggling with these type of posts.

Cat 1:

I feel as though you may be in a sort of identity crisis. Maybe you're going through a time of major change, and it is causing some crisis of sorts. You're worldview has been shaken and you're brain chemistry has been altered dramatically. Additionally, this could be some drastic change in your spirituality or maybe you're leaving a religion for another or just leaving religion entirely and being hounded by your community for doing so. I know it's stressful, I know you're probably extremely critical of yourself, picking and panicking over every little mistake you make. I want you to take a deep breath and know that this isn't the end of the world. Take the energy you use to criticise yourself to maybe journal, do some shadow work or gratitude journalling. You don't have to write paragraphs after paragraphs. Even one bullet point can make a difference. Let out your thoughts on paper so you don't end up blowing up on someone. and regretting it. Let it out, clear your head and do some damage control before evaluating what steps you have to take to get yourself out of this pit.

Try to reconnect with your inner child, let that child within you have their moment. Do something simple and childish, colour a book, draw. Do something you've always wanted to do, surround yourself with people you love and your friends, let them help you. Trust that those who care about you have your back. Do not let this temporary setback make you lose sight of what you want. This stressful and dark time you are going through is coming to an end. The only reason this moment seems endless to you, is because it is YOU that is unintentionally dragging this moment. Maybe you're stretching on an argument, or clinging onto a grudge, or just simply holding onto bad habits. You are hurting yourself at this point, and there is no one else to blame but yourself. Accept this pain, let go of this grudge or actually try to stop repeating bad habits. And it's not easy. I have a smoking habit myself, but I am taking steps. I haven't smoked for a month now and it has taken too many failed attempts for me to get here. Do not prolong this situation, because when you fall it will hurt even more. Try stepping out of your comfort zone, baby steps is perfectly fine. For me, getting out of my comfort zone meant wearing more form fitting outfits. I started with crop tops and a jacket over, then moved onto just crop tops and jeans. Then only recently have I gotten the confidence to get out of the house in flared leggings. Very simple, yet so effective in telling you: "Hey, it's okay. See, You're fine. You look so beautiful when you're confidently wearing what you want.". Everyone's journey is different, take your time, but taking the steps is what matters.

Cat 2:

There is someone (or was someone) in your life that absolutely changed your life for the best, someone that was there for you in your hardest time. You might be feeling a bit guilty in the sense that they are always there for you, that whatever you give them (or want to give them) seems inadequate, or maybe this person is not in your life anymore and you feel guilt for not expressing your gratitude while they were there. The guilt is weighing you down, and might be leading to insecurities as well. Just know that even a simple acknowledgement and thanks is a gift, while not the most extravagant, it does hold meaning. Open your heart, let them know how grateful you are. And if you struggle with this, a small simple, meaningful gift will always send the message. A gift is a gift, it's the thought that matters. Let this person know, that you appreciate them for more than the comfort they bring you. And if they aren't in your life anymore and it feels like it's too late, it can be as simple as a journal entry addressed to this person. Pour out your heart and write the letter as though you would send it to them if they were present. Or maybe you went through a rocky split up (romantic, platonic) and you want to reach out but you're unsure whether or not you should. Give it a shot. If the other person doesn't respond or responds very harshly, let it go. At least you tried. Or maybe things just fell apart. Me and a few of my high school friends went to different colleges and just stopped chatting with each other. And even now, it's so awkward to try and chat with them, but also so awkward to unfollow them.

Take some time off if you can, maybe during a special occasion. If you're celebrating something with this person, let it be more intimate. Maybe with close friends/family or even just you and this person. Make time for this person, like they do for you. Or maybe it's a day that reminds you of them, honour them by doing something they enjoyed. One thing my grandmother enjoyed doing when she was alive was travelling to sacred, religious places where I live. Every year, my family and I go to these places, pray for her and have fun because she would have wanted that for us. If you've had a split up with this person with so many unsaid things, reach out. Get your closure, clear the air of misunderstandings if there are. If it's with someone you've gradually lost touch with and the awkwardness has stopped you from reaching out. Don't. Reply to their story, send them messages or posts online. let them know that you want to rekindle the friendship. Let them know, that you are also wanting to have this relationship (platonic, romantic). I've said to try and rekindle the relationships/reach out so many times and here I am saying it again: MEND THE RELATIONSHIP!!! BUILD BACK THE FUCKING BRIDGE! Forgive them, but also most importantly, forgive YOURSELF!! It's normal being hard on yourself. This however, what you're saying/doing to yourself is not it bbg. You need love right now, sweet summer child, not criticism. Put your inner critic on the back seat, let your inner healer take control. Do some self care. Face masks, spa, massage, manicure/pedicure. Take care of yourself.

Cat 3:

You're in a crisis. You have conflicting emotions that are fluctuating so fast it's giving you whiplash. Maybe you're facing a choice where you have to leave what you have known. Maybe you're home for further studies or maybe you're planning on moving homes or cutting off contact with family or friends you've known for a long time. It's difficult, because you are potentially leaving what you've always known, what your comfortable with/or people who you've known for a long time. There will always be people who will not support your decision, especially if you're cutting off contact with close family members or friends who you used to always be with. This crisis/conflicting emotions are more so due to you not wanting to deal with criticism from people you've grown up with and less to do with whether you want to do it or not. Because you do. You know it is what you want, but the potential of people's reaction is what's stopping you. If you always walk on eggshells when making decisions, to appease the people around you, you won't make it far. Stop caring about the opinion of people who don't have your best interests at heart.

Maybe what you are pursuing (If it is further studies/a job) is something that you've always wanted to pursue but have been discouraged to do so because it: "Won't put a roof over your hear head and feed you". A creative job/study. Art, music, dance, literally anything that requires creativity. Don't let these people have you give up on your dreams and instead have you slave away at a stressful office job/"prestigious" job. Don't be afraid to splurge on yourself once in a while. Treat yourself to a nice dinner in a fancy restaurant, or buy yourself something you've always wanted. Or even simpler, take a self care day. Take your time bathing, put on a face mask, dress yourself up (even if it is just to go get groceries) If you want to see change, you must initiate it. Don't be a sheep that follows people around mindlessly, take control/the reins if you have to. Assert yourself. Let your opinions stand out, true and strong.

Cat 4:

You're stretching out something tense, maybe an argument, maybe something that really angered you. And i'm not saying that you're anger is not justified. It is, what's not justified is how you're dragging this out. Blowing this situation out of proportion, making a mountain out a molehill. You are getting on the defensive, feeling the strong urge to prove that you are correct or that you didn't do something (or perhaps did) But at this point you're arguing at the wall honey. Know when to stop your battles, get yourself in check before the universe slaps you in the face. The other party has already dropped out, not wanting to spend their time arguing an age old issue. Come to terms with what happened, and try to calmly speak your mind. If you can't, journal it. let it go.

This conflict has you shaken and feeling unsure. What I'm getting is to make sure you're not biased, make sure to listen to the other person's side as well. Just listen and make your decision then. Because if you make a decision right now, it will only be more chaotic. Don't make a decision yet, wait, give yourself some space to clear your head because you're mind is not in the right space to make important decisions right now. Maybe this conflict is between you and a friend or a sibling/family member. I'm feeling that this conflict could be solved if you were to communicate, but there is such a clear lack of it that I am quite speechless. Talk things out, calmly and clearly, let them know how they hurt you and let them apologize/talk as well. Forgive if you can. Enforce boundaries with this person, maybe they overstepped despite your warnings and it was what caused this conflict. Remember, forgiving is good but it's not necessary to heal. If this person has been constantly overstepping your boundaries, firmly set them and cut off contact if you must. Or just be very firm and strict with your boundaries, you might have a habit of caving in to this person walking all over you. Not anymore.

[dreamwreaver]

Thank you for putting that anti-charlastor troll in their place.

Reading that whole debate was just amazing. Everything you said I agreed with and was just so I don't' know, like professional. I really wished Chaggie was a better ship. I want to love it so bad.

Can I be honest? I didn't know they were a couple until episode 5 where Charlie introduced Vaggie to her dad as being "her girlfriend" which was a cute moment. Like I went in blind without knowing anything, no pilot, no anything. The fan content for Chaggie is peak though. The show just did the ship dirty.

Looking back it was pretty obvious. Maybe? If you knew beforehand they were girlfriends. I just thought they were best friends. My mind was blown and I had to pause it for a minute. Like I was short circuiting. I'm pretty clueless though so maybe it was just me.

I thought they had been setting up for Charlastor but guess not! Heh.

I really hope the writers for season 2 give some more Chaggie. I want a couple not just one kiss in an entire season.

But on to my main point: I am a Charlastor shipper through and through. I want to like Chaggie but its hard to ignore the amazing chemistry Alastor and Charlie have.

They both love the stage. Both are extremely extroverted. Yet they are foils of each other. They push and pull. Charlie will hopefully teach him to be more kind and Al teaches her to be more assertive. Also they are such a black and red couple. They just look so damn good together.

I could yap about Charlastor forever. I'm gonna stop.

Anyways, the fact that troller put that nasty ass post into the charlastor tag actually made my blood boil. Thank you. Just thank you so much.

-Joney

Hi there nonny,

Thank you for your kind words. To be quite honest part of me does feel a little bad for the troll, but all indications seem to point to them being old enough to know better. I don't hold any ill will towards them since they just wanted a fight and picked who they thought would be easiest to get one from.

Unfortunately, there seems to be a stereotype that because we're not actively combatting every single anti post that were easy targets who'll take rage bait and run with it. It's not true, but part of the reason I can keep so calm is that all of my petty fandom bullshit is saved for a private discord where my friends and I can laugh at it or discuss issues we have with any other ships without being accused of being homophobic, acephobic, whatever.

Beyond all of that, unfortunately I'm used to this behavior. Most of my ships are problematic in one way or another and even if they're heavily implied canon or outright get married people will find any reason to deny it and take a moral high ground that doesn't really exist. It's fandom, in this case it's a fandom about hell, where bad people are. It's like when people got mad Katie killjoy was an actual homophobe and my response was, "so where do you want the homophobe to go? Heaven? Doesn't that send a worse message?"

I just want to enjoy my ship in my little dumpster. By all means hate the ship, I'm not telling people to like charlastor, just don't leave your hatred in the tag. Be decent is all.

As for chaggie, I really hope that season 2 does them better, for the sake of those nice shippers who just wants enjoy their couple and got so shafted last season. Thanks again nonny!

[lxndonorris]

seized moments - Felipe Drugovich

Y/N x Felipe Drugovich Theme: smutish (teasing, touching, not too explicit) having a touchy moment with Felipe during the race x word count: 1330+

The sun already set on this beautiful, exciting day in Bahrain. It's the first race day of the new Formula 1 season, and you're in the paddock, supporting your boyfriend Felipe. You're standing right next to him near the Aston Martin garage, watching the race together. As a reserve driver, he is meant to replace another in case they're unable to race. This time, he's on standby, so you can spend more time with him. It's a struggle, on the one hand, you love seeing him race, seeing him compete, being so damn passionate, but on the other hand, you're now with him, and you can enjoy the sight of him wearing his new, green racing suit from Aston Martin.

He's all geared up in case of an emergency, but everything is going very smoothly today. Both, Fernando and Lance, are performing extremely well, and it seems to be a promising season for the entire team, including Felipe. Now, you're standing right next to him, the two of you watching the race on a giant screen, with him occasionally wandering closer to the pit wall every time one of the cars crosses the finish line. You're taking advantage of this since this suit flatters his strong frame perfectly. Especially his shoulders, his chest, and his butt are looking so fine, and he is fully aware of that. Mostly, he has his arms crossed in front of his chest, causing the fabric to be tight around his muscles.

Felipe stops, lifting his chin slightly thinking deeply. He's wearing headphones too, so he can get acquainted with the processes and the chemistry inside the team. Though, obviously, his is muted most of the time, so he won't interrupt anything by accident. Slowly, you approach him from behind, intertwining your arm with his, pulling him a little closer toward you. This pulls him out of this state, he turns his head and smiles shyly. Carefully, you lift one part of his headphones, to whisper into his ear. "Penny for your thoughts?" You breathe into his ear, and he giggles.

Felipe removes the headset completely and holds it tight in one of his hands. "I'm… I am just happy to be here." He says quietly, his eyes back on track as another car, the Red Bull, crosses the line again. "Being here is my dream come true." You pout for a short second, even if this sounds a bit cheesy, you know he means it. Since the day he announced his partnership with Aston Martin, he's never been happier. Gently pulling at his arm again, you smile. "We should celebrate that." You say, unable to hide the playful grin forming on your lips.

Instantly, he turns to you again, one eyebrow raised curiously. "Celebrate?" He says, his eyes shifting between your eyes and your lips. "Yeah, I mean." You say, playing the innocent one before you place a hand on his chest. "is there a place, to be, alone?" He licks his lips at the sound of your voice, and raises his head, checking his surroundings, if anyone is overhearing you. "Oh, I know a place," Felipe says in a hushed tone. "Give me a second." He smiles, places a single kiss on your cheek, and heads towards some team members. You watch him blush, before he smiles, and nods.

He returns, still blushing, as he runs a hand through his beautifully curled hair. "We've got 15 minutes." Felipe leans in, his voice down to a whisper. "'Kay." You say while he takes your hand, leading you through the garage into a labyrinth of passageways. "Just around here." He says, his voice a little higher pitched than usual. You walk around the corner and find a more secluded area. Just a few stacks of tires, put-up walls, and containers stand around, the perfect place to not be filmed every second. "Awesome." You say as you turn to him, and he immediately raises his hands. "If they call me, I need to go. I had to promise that." He says, trying his best to hide an excited smile behind a more serious expression.

"Fine." You say, playfully rolling your eyes. Of course, as soon as his team needs him, he has to go, that's how life goes. Licking his lips again in anticipation, he takes a step forward, his hands immediately looking for your waist, pulling you into a sweet, but longing kiss. "Mhmm." You breathe deeply, as his tongue slowly, but surely explores your mouth, leaving a few drops of his delicious taste everywhere he goes. At the same time, you take in the familiar, alluring scent of his cologne, which gets intensified by your longing desire for more.

"Feels good." He growls as you steady yourself against his broad frame, stroking his chest firmly through the fabric of his racing suit. Both of you enjoy this, a lot. Felipe loves to be fondled in that way, with you feeling his pecs firmly, while you feel his hands gently stroking your butt. After a few more strokes, you unbutton the collar of his racing suit, causing him to flinch for a second, surprised. "Oh, really?" He smirks, leaning his head back just enough for you to still feel his lips lingering on yours. "Yeah." You breathe, placing a hand on the zipper, teasingly pulling it down. At the same time, his eyes shift between your hand and your eyes, with them shimmering slightly in the pale, artificial light.

With his top now slightly unzipped, you slip one hand inside, touching him, teasing him, by stroking his nipples with your thumb. "Fuck." He purrs deeply, and the two of you move a little closer to a wall, with him leaning against it. "Feels good, huh?" You smirk, satisfied with your work. Felipe nods and exhales, just as your hand wanders all over his chest, his pecs, nipples, and even further down to trace the visible, tangible outlines of his abs with the tip of your fingers.

Simultaneously, his hands wander to your waist, before he starts to stroke the small of your back gently. For a while, you stand there, both of you purring, growling, and muttering how much you enjoy this. Then, your hand follows his treasure trail, a little further down, just beneath his navel. "Y/N." He moans quietly, closing his eyes for just a second before regaining his composure. "Babè. You know I love that." Felipe says, his eyes now stuck on yours. "I do." You whisper, leaning into him once more, to kiss him lovingly.

To tease him a little further, you make sure to run a hand even further down, noticing a bulge forming in his pants. You know all of his most sensitive spots, and you make sure to let him know every time you're making out. He's like an open book, a beautiful, stunning book to be sure. "Oh?" You say, acting shocked, while he just nods defeated. "Shut up." He groans breathlessly, grabbing your chin gently before playfully pushing you away. "You love it." You giggle, removing your hand from his crotch, to grab his chin now. "Say it:" Firmly, you hold his face in front of yours, and with your other hand, you stroke his chest again. "I love you." He says, catching you off-guard. "I love you too." You say, blushing heavily, and you kiss him once again.

The time is nearly over, but before you head back, you make sure to wait a little bit, because the forming tent inside his suit is giving everything away. Felipe runs a hand across his own chest, touching himself through his fireproofs, once, then twice, before closing it in one swift movement. You pat his chest gently and close his collar. "That felt good." He purrs happily and takes your hand. At the same time, he touches himself with his empty hand. "I am glad." You say and hug him. Felipe embraces your body against his, placing a kiss on your forehead.

[girl4music]

WayHaught’s intimacy/off-screen sex/make out/representation/whatever you want to call it scene.

Some WEARP fans that have watched and reviewed the special have said that the scene feels forced or a little too convenient. I know exactly what they mean by that. First of all - the direction of it is literally in your face. There’s no artistic nuance as far as the direction and framing of it goes. The soundstage is purposefully erotic. It’s meant to be what it’s meant to be. Sex. And the portrayal… well, it’s typical DomKat chemistry, for sure, but it doesn’t feel like it’s their choreography. It feels like this time - it was all the showrunner’s choice. Which isn’t necessarily a bad thing. It’s just not what we’re used to as veterans in engaging with WEARP when it comes to the way DomKat themselves portray WayHaught’s physical intimacy. It usually looks and feels a lot more natural and improvised. This wasn’t so it didn’t feel as organic as I’m used to seeing it being.

It was still a realistic and authentic portrayal of WLW intimacy. It just didn’t look or feel like WayHaught’s specifically because it didn’t look or feel like DomKat. I mean I could be entirely wrong about that. Maybe this is just how both actors being settled into and fully embracing and comfortable with their queerness are. I’m just saying that it didn’t look or feel that way to me. However, what I did pick up to counteract that about the intimacy scene which was absolutely a return to form for WayHaught - that I always really love - was what caused it to happen in the scene itself. It was emotional intimacy and a useful and effective way to convey and develop on their narrative. It was, to me, a beautifully written acknowledgement and communication of both Waverly and Nicole’s feelings, desires, intentions, ambitions in that Waverly has just received acceptance and validation from Nicole that they could part ways for awhile in order for her to do what she wants to do in Egypt with Jeremy and in how Nicole confesses to her her tendency to delay or stifle Waverly’s potential because she doesn’t want to be without her and because her own personal desires and ambitions include and require Waverly to be around - to be home, with her as partners. I actually really like that this was how their physical intimacy came about. That it wasn’t just made into a scene for the sake of it even though Emily likely did think about that part first because she always makes representation a priority.

Also - as I mentioned in a previous post - I also really like how Waverly’s top came off but Nicole’s didn’t because I genuinely felt that was in respect to Kat being pregnant. Just as I feel it was also in respect to Kat being pregnant that that intimacy scene didn’t go on any longer than was necessary to convey the intention of the scene and so they wouldn’t be left in the awkward position of representing a full-on WLW sex scene because I have no idea how they could without making Kat feel extremely uncomfortable as much as the fans probably wanted and wished for it to happen in and at that moment. Emily thought of Kat.

And forgive me for being blatantly gay and a pervert, but I could not fucking take my eyes off Dom there so obviously, that was also a factor why I love the scene. But I mean, I was pretty much staring at Dom every time they were on screen throughout the entire thing. I cannot believe how much more visually attractive I find the character Waverly with a butch presentation. So yeah, that contributed a whole lot too. I won’t lie. I’m a red blooded queer woman. Fucking sue me 💁‍♀️

All in all though, I was satisfied with what we got for that scene given the 90-minute timeframe restriction and the fact that they had to hide or cover Kat’s belly. I do feel the choreography could have looked and felt more natural to DomKat’s chemistry but it’s no big deal. I’m happy I got a well-written scene regardless.

There’s certainly been much worse WLW representation of physical intimacy in TV art/entertainment. I think what we got was pretty good.

It’s just not what we’re used to getting. That’s all.

[purble-turble]

Mk learning about love potions pre season 4 because red son tried using one on him. It didnt work because hes head over heels already, and its really a funny getting together story after the screaming and fighting is over with.

The idea of Red Son using a love potion is extremely funny to me because he clearly has such a huge problem with his own self-worth. So to him, using a love potion to get the person he has feelings for to love him back might seem like the only way he'll ever really get what he wants... however, that doesn't mean it's a good idea or that it'll work out like he thinks.

In this scenario, let's say Red Son doses MK with a love potion, then waits expectantly for MK to come to him... but it seems like nothing has changed. (It hasn't, MK was already super in love with him and the potion didn't affect him.) So, Red Son wonders if perhaps he has to make the first move, so he just goes up to MK and asks if he'll go on a date with him. The excitement with with MK screams YES!!! kind of confirms to Red Son that, ah yes, his love potion did work.

They date for a little while and Red can't believe how deliriously happy MK makes him. They spend every possible moment together and it's everything Red Son could possibly have wanted in a relationship... except there's this nagging feeling in the back of his mind telling him that this isn't real.

MK doesn't actually love him. He's only behaving this way because Red Son gave him a magic potion... if he wasn't influenced by that spell then surely he would have rejected Red Son's advances outright. The thought that the love of his life doesn't really love him is eating him up inside and making him miserable. The more he grows to love MK the more guilty he feels about manipulating him in this way. MK deserves better, he's the warm sunshine that lights up Red's world and he doesn't deserve to be tied to such a wicked villain like Red Son who apparently cares so little for him that he'd change the very chemistry of his brain.

The inner turmoil is too much for Red Son to bear, and it's definitely noticeable because one night when MK asks him what's wrong because he's clearly upset, he confesses everything.

At first MK is stunned and believes Red Son that his feelings were actually just the influence of magic. He's having a hard time coming to grips with the fact that all the positive feelings he has about Red Son are apparently fake, and yeah it definitely makes him really angry. As they argue, something comes to light that throws this whole love potion starting their relationship thing into a bit of a questionable territory... MK reveals that he's had budding feelings for Red Son all the way back during their team up to defeat Spider Queen. He assumes that Red Son means that that is when he first gave him the love potion (I mean he did create a potion back during that adventure so it's not totally implausible) but when Red hears this it kind of shocks him and he insists that he only gave MK the potion like a day or two before he asked him out. MK insists back that his feelings for Red definitely did not change suddenly around that time and he already had a crush on Red by that time. There's a bit of confusion here where MK and Red are not entirely sure what that means.. MK thinks maybe Red is lying and Red thinks maybe the love potion has affected MK's memory of his own emotions going as far back as New Years.

They don't find a solution to this right away, they are both way too stupid and too emotional to realize in that moment what has really occurred. Red Son leaves and goes back to sulk in his parents' palace (miserably) believing he's ruined his relationship to the only person who's ever made him feel happy and loved, and MK decides to do his own research with his friends' help to figure out this love potion stuff. It's when they do a bit of digging on how the potion actually works that the possibility that the love potion did nothing to MK comes up. Turns out that if he loved Red Son already then the potion can't make him love Red Son because he already does! This is a huge relief to MK because he really didn't want his feelings to be fake, he really enjoyed being with Red! He goes to find the fire demon and share the good news.

For his own part, Red Son has just been moping in his room for a week, suffering in his own misery and fear that he'll never be as happy as he was during that short time he was with MK because he is not worthy of real love.. and one evening MK comes bursting through his window shouting that he figured out that he really DOES love Red Son and what they had wasn't actually fake and they can be together again! ...it takes some convincing for Red Son to believe him, and he probably also whips up an antidote that he forces MK to drink to assuage his doubts that this isn't just the love potion still talking.

In the end they do manage to stay together, despite the rocky start. It isn't without consequences, though. Sometimes Red's self-worth rears its ugly head and makes him question whether MK actually loves him and this isn't all just him deluding himself into thinking the potion didn't work... when that happens MK just kisses him a whole bunch all over his face and then tells him to stop being so fucking stupid :P

[absolutebl]

Do you have any recent recommendations for JBL TaiwanBL and KBL? Been rewatching only bls from 2021 2022 and I feel like I'm out of the loop for the more recent ones.

Maybe something from this year or late last year?

Great JBL, TaBL, and KBL from 2023 & first half 2024

asker added:

Genre = mostly anything. But pls avoid homophobic trauma (like Jazz for Two).

Fair. Okay here we go!

2023 Recs!

I picked mostly 9s and 10s for you with a few 8s I felt specifically might suit your taste.

I Cannot Reach You AKA Kimi ni wa Todokanai

Japan Netflix

This classic friends-to-lovers BL is everything Japan does best. Angsty. Emo. Aching. Driven by real thirst. Yamato is deeply in love with his childhood bestie, Kakeru, and has been for ages, unable to hide his ungainly damaging high school need. He wants Kakeru in every way possible and it oozes off of the screen. Kakeru is silly and a little simple, but not frenetic or overly camp about it. He is earnest, and genuinely wants to keep Yamato in his life which means giving a romance (and gayness) a fair chance. We watch him realize his affection and what form it can take in a truly authentic way. This show was impossibly kind to both of its lead characters and I felt almost honored that I got to watch something so lovely and rare play out on my screen.

Our Dating Sim

Korea Viki

This is a perfect short form KBL, an office set reunion romance featuring geeks that really suits 8 eps with no fluff and no chaff. Just comforting and yummy. I adored every aspect from the casting to the pristinely simple premise to the quietly smooth execution. Sure it’s low stakes, but that makes it high domesticity and extremely warm and gentle. This is a fuzzy blanket of a story - a cozy BL. It lives in my rewatch pile and you know what’s best about it? Every single episode is in that pile. There’s no skipping with this one, it might be good natured and calmly sweet but it’s tight and the pacing is excellent.

I don't hand out 10/10 often (over 700 BLs watched, stil don't hvae 10 10/10s yet), these both got that from me in 2023. I consider both of them perfect BLs.

My Personal Weatherman AKA Taikan Yoho

Japan Gaga

This style of live action yaoi really only works from Japan. Basically: boys who fell in love in college end up living together but both are so repressed they actually don't realize they're in love. It's higher heat than we usually get from Japan's HEA stuff, and that part is also very well done, but it leaned into the "why don't they just talk for fuck's sake?" trope which is only exacerbated into undiluted frustration by the fact that they're already fucking. It's great, but watching requires more patience than usual, even for Japan.

Our Dining Table AKA Bokura no Shokutaku

Japan Gaga

A lonely salaryman (+ talented cook) gets accidentally adopted by a college kid and his little brother. I was always gonna love this show if they stuck to the original yaoi (which is very dear to my heart). And they did! Paralleling it almost exactly. It’s a quiet & cozy little parable of found family alleviating loneliness. Possibly too slow for some but definitely high up there for me as the best of what Japan can do with softness (like Restart After Come Back Home). It’s only flaw (if I dare say such a thing) is that it is not really “romantic.” Lovely & sweet but the romance beats are being used to build a family relationship, not just couple intimacy, but that's OK with me. This is a very safe show for anyone to watch.

Jun and Jun

Korea Viki

A delightful office romance about an ex-idol who joins cubical life only to find his new boss is his first love. Others boys are sniffing around too. Operative word being "sniffing" as much of this romance involves smell. With a snappy (sometimes even raunchy) script, enjoyable sides, a pretty as peaches cast, and descent chemistry this show made up for in style what it lacked in substance. I like fluff. I loved this. I smiled every moment I was watching. With tons of rewatch potential (especially the last few eps), my only caution is this is for fans of the BL genre only, I don’t think it’ll work for anyone else.

Love Tractor

Korea iQIYI

Most of this country-set BL had me feral for the beautiful broken city boy and his hot young farmer. Hyung romance, puppy/cat pairing, open frankness meets jaded reserve, language play, water hose frolicking, only one bed, just all my favorite tropes. This show was basically a light-weight Restart After Come Back Home and I’m not even slightly mad about that. But (and you knew there was a “but” comg) something about the cringe of the final 2 eps and the impermanence of the ending (both of which highlight the fact that ultimately these 2 are I’ll-suited: too different and too far apart) left me with the feeling that they probably won’t last as a couple. However, in this case, rare for me, I forgive it this finale for my love of the rest.

The New Employee

Korea Viki

So good, SO QUEER, so soft, a near pitch perfect office BL with conflict derived from that setting. Also found family and a lesbian bestie. Sweet & innocent (and out) Seung Hyun scores the office internship of his dreams. On his first day at work he gets into it with his cool reserved (and also v gay) boss. As you do. Frankly? This is what I wanted from this new crop of office set KBLs ALL ALONG. Rainbow rice cakes forever! Directed by queer activist Kim Jho Gwang Soo (Just Friends?) partly set in the same neighbourhood as the To My Star house. Gotta love WATCHA (Semantic Error, Light on Me).

Unintentional Love Story

Korea iQIYI

OMG the plot, forced into a totally understandable betrayal, falling in love despite himself, put into a corner he can't get out of, the AGONY, the eyes EMOTING at us in PAIN A boy who just lost his job due to faked corruption charges accidentally discovers his ex-boss's favorite artist, now a recluse. Evil manager offers him his job back if he can convince the artist to rejoin society. Instead, they fall in love. I found the artist a bit stiff and reserved but Gongchan (maknae of B1A4) is a fucking GIFT - he carried this show (which I do not expect from the idol element). He was lumous with extraordinarily expressive eyes, just drown in the emoting abyss. The external conflict, social tension and pressure is complex and beautifully executed, plus Korea gave us legit side dishes (NOT a love triangle, hally-fucking-luya). I’m not sure on rewatchability, and it didn’t whip me into a verbal frenzy the way some KBLs do, but it still gets a solid 9/10 for those damn eyes alone.

A Breeze of Love

Korea iQIYI

Tsundere insomniac grump reunited with his sunshine jock ex (human sleeping pill) who now hates him. Basketball is also involved. While the simplicity of a reunion plot makes this more cohesive than most KBLs, it is a tad stiff and slow, never managing to lift itself out of "pretty and pretty enjoyable" - I liked it but I don’t think I’m going to remember much about it. 

Bon Appetit

Korea iQIYI

Romance between an office worker the man from his past next door who cooks well. It was very sweet and cute tale of food as love in the All the Liquors family of KBL. I’m not wild about it, I did enjoy it, I was happy to have it show up on my dash, but ultimately it will simply become one of the KBL crowd.

Why R U?

(Korean adaptation of Thai original) iQIYI

Korea decided to remake, of all possible Thai BLs, Why RU? And that is exactly what we got: a short form, clean & pretty, slightly confusing, uneven chemistry, all the same tropes KBL that kind of cliff-noted the original but with none of the heat or complex relationship dynamics. I just … what world is this? Because it is BOTH bizarro land, and EXACTLY what I expected. How do I rate it? In the end I have to go back to simple questions: did I like it, would I rewatch it, and would I recommend it? Yes. Probably. And probably not. What the actual hell?

It did, however win my best kiss of 2023 which is why it's on this list.

Stay By My Side

Taiwan Viki

I wanted to pick SOMETHING from Taiwan but my other two options both had lots of trauma in them. So I'm going with this one.

This show was an interesting take on the "ghost boyfriend" trope. About a boy who is tormented by hearing the dead, except when he is around one other boy - desperation+proximity = love. Unfortunately, the story was erratic and waffled about. While the leads turned in solid performances and the sappy domesticity was off the charts, it never really had the strength of the narrative convictions such a strong concept should have supplied. Highly rewatchable and enjoyable for that sappy domesticity but not a whole lot more. Still I always give extra credit for the diabetes-inducing sugar content and rewatch capacity.

And some suggestions from 2024

I'm only suggesting stuff that has finished it's run and isn't currently airing.

Although I Love You and You AKA Sukiyanen Kedo Do Yaro ka

Japan Gaga

The promise of this show, younger cook courts older divorced office worker, should have been my catnip. I mean if someone pitched this to me in an elevator I would have downloaded it by the second storey. Unfortunately, it did not exactly fulfill that promise, not in the way I'd hoped. Did I still enjoy the ride, yes, but I feel just a little let down.

Living With Him AKA Kare no Iru Seikatsu

Japan Gaga

Kindly Ryota goes to uni and ends up rooming with his former childhood bestie, Kazuhito. Kazuhito doesn’t have a girlfriend for, as it turns out, cute roommate reasons. Same director as Old Fashion Cupcake, the framing is gorgeous and it is a stylish piece. As a friends to lovers cohabitation narrative this was a classic 2000s sweet yaoi. I enjoy that kind of tradition out of Japan even if it (and the characters) come off as a little slow as a result. Still, it's nice to get a traditional BL out of Japan that is satisfying, not slapstick, AND did not hurt us.

[cherrylng]

Muse HAARP Interview - Matthew Bellamy & Dominic Howard [ROCKIN'ON (May 2008)]

"I think people want an experience where they can feel connected to a lot of people and themselves. I think a lot of people feel isolated and irrelevant to each other in today's culture. We're in an age where we feel like we have extremely little or nothing in common with the people around us."

Release of the live DVD 'HAARP', a non-standard live DVD by a non-standard band! A thorough examination of the chemistry of Muse, the stadium band of the new era!

Interview by Shino Kogawa / Interpreter: Momoko Iwata

Muse's massive concert held at London's Wembley Stadium on June 16th and 17th, 2007, which attracted 80,000 people (of course it was sold out) in one day, was an incredible stage that exposed the band Muse's unconventional structure and extraordinary performance, and has already been talked about many times as one of the major music topics of last year. However, when I watched the DVD "HAARP", which is a package of the two days at Wembley, I still felt like I was going to be blown away, even though I was fully aware of the characteristics of Muse. It is not simply the sheer volume of 80,000 people that is amazing, it is the surprise at the 'volume' of Muse's music that makes you think it is natural to swallow 80,000 people, and the excitement at the scale of Muse's music that makes you think stadium rock is neither nostalgia nor a commercial necessity, but purely an 'absolute requirement' in this day and age. We spoke to Matthew and Dom.

MATTHEW BELLAMY INTERVIEW

Watching the DVD again, it's a truly extraordinary show. With the monumental stage packaged, for the first time you could objectively question the meaning of 160,000 people for two days at Wembley, what is the most intense moment of feedback? 「There were a few, but during 'Blackout' two professional acrobats dangled from helium-filled balloons and danced on top of the crowd, which was a magical moment. It was a magical moment, especially for us, because the audience's attention shifted from the band to the two of them, and we could relax a bit and enjoy the dancing. We weren't just performers from the beginning to the end, but we were able to experience it from the audience's point of view, so in that sense it was my favourite moment at the show, and I'll never forget it. Also, I think we will always remember how nervous we were in the first ten minutes before we went on stage on the first day. It was the most nervous I've ever felt, my mind went blank and I felt like I was completely empty. It was almost like an astral projection experience, as if I was looking at myself from the outside in that state, and finally, about five or ten minutes into the show, I started to feel normal again. There was so much pressure and tension that my spirit just slipped out of my body, or something like that.」

Can you tell us about anything that you didn't realise from the stage that day, for example, that you only realised after watching this video? 「When you're playing in a big venue, you rarely get to see each and every face in the audience. So for us, it was great to see the faces and expressions of the audience up close in this way. When we were editing the DVD, we made a conscious effort to include these images. Also, the acrobatics during 'Blackout,' which we talked about earlier, we actually wanted those two to be the main characters, not the band, as we felt they were…………… We wanted to create that weird feeling of the two of them flying above everybody, like Mary Poppins. That's why it took a lot of work to edit the film so that you don't see the wire that's holding them up. We wanted it to look like they were really floating above the audience.」

Can you tell us about the origin of the name HAARP? 「HAARP stands for the "High-frequency Active Auroral Research Program", a device invented by a man called Nikola Tesla and installed in Alaska by the US government. Some say it's a weapon, some say it's a communications device, some say it's a mystery, but it's a device that can send radio frequencies into the ionosphere (※the layer in the upper stratosphere where radio waves are reflected), and according to Nikola Tesla's research and hypothesis, which the US government purchased, it can manipulate the weather by doing so. Well, this is another conspiracy theory with a quirk. I used a photo of the device in the sleeve of Black Holes and Revelations, and the antenna of the device was actually the original idea for the stage design of the show. There were a lot of metal sets and antenna-like things in this show, and we were going for a design that all looked like HAARP antennas. You could say it was inspired by conspiracy theories, you could say it mimicked a giant communications device, or several communication devices, in short, it's a bit of a strange design like that, and the little light in the triangle symbolises an all-seeing eye.」

Wembley Stadium was not built as a live hall in the first place, so what were the areas you paid the most attention to in terms of acoustics, and what was the most difficult part of recreating Muse's dynamic and detailed music? 「Outdoor shows are always difficult in terms of sound production, both because the place is so big and the echoes are so strong. But we didn't want to compromise on either, so we decided to start with a surround system and put speakers around the whole stadium. That way, the people in the back could hear the sound in real time, as the speakers were very close to them. We rehearsed a lot before the show, but the reverberation was so strong that it was quite difficult to play. The rhythms were all messed up, so we rehearsed more and got used to the echoes and got ourselves to the point where we didn't get dragged down by them. The hardest part was when we were playing away from each other, then you could hear the other two players both in the monitors and in the echoes. But this was more difficult in rehearsals, because when the audience actually comes in, the sound is absorbed by them and the echoes are much less. But now the audience's shouting echoes (laughs)… Well, it was still more fun to listen to.」

The euphoria of 80,000 people in unison during "Starlight", the chorus of the intro to "Knights of Cydonia", the spectacular soundscape and unquenchable afterglow of "Take a Bow". There's no shortage of great moments in this collection, but which song was the most satisfying in terms of the quality of the performance? 「I think it was Knights of Cydonia, because we were so nervous that we weren't sure if we were going to be able to play that opening number well. It was a difficult song to begin with, so it took a lot of courage to open with it. But looking back on it now, it's the most memorable song because it symbolises the change from starting out feeling very nervous to becoming more and more relaxed and enjoying the performance and the show. By the end of that song, we and the audience were really excited, and that led directly to the atmosphere of the whole show.」

On the other hand, there is a negative image of stadium rock as a product of 'old-fashioned rock'. What can you say Muse proved with this Wembley 2-Day show? 「I think we proved that the fans of today also want to enjoy large-scale concerts like this, and want to have fun with many people. I think the fans' desire to do so may be even stronger than it was ten or fifteen years ago. Especially in the last three or four years, big festivals and concerts have become popular, and it might have been the fashion in the 80s, but it's been a long time since then. I think people want this kind of experience where they can feel connected to a lot of people. I think a lot of people in the culture these days feel that way, like they're isolated and irrelevant to each other. We're in an era where you feel like you have extremely little or nothing in common with the people around you. For example, if 60,000 people gather at a show or festival, everyone there likes a certain band or a certain style of music, so something that is common to 60,000 people seems very pure in this day and age. I think those two nights of shows that we did showed to the outside world that everyone's desire to have something in common with other people, to have a common experience, is stronger than ever.」

The overwhelming dramaturgy of Muse's sound was strongly felt again on this DVD. I think this is Muse's unique character, which goes to the opposite extreme of UK indie rock that plays a life story on a scale that suits its stature. Is it partly because of the extreme size of the stadium that you were able to realise 100% of your individuality? 「I think you're right. There are a few of our numbers that are better in a big space like that. "Take A Bow", parts of "Knights of Cydonia", and "Blackout", for example. I think songs with such overwhelming emotion make more sense when there's a bigger audience. I don't really know why that's the case. I think the dramatic elements of the songs are made even more profound by the unique tension and energy that a space as big as a stadium and a big audience can create.」

Do you think the Wembley Stadium show was some kind of milestone for Muse? 「I think we've always had the opportunity to try something new towards the end of a tour, not just this time. Arenas, theatres, and stadiums are all very different experiences, and on the 'Origin of Symmetry' tour we only played one arena show at the end, which was very exciting. On the next tour, the 'Absolution' tour, we started to play at various festivals towards the end… Glastonbury and Reading, we were even surprised that we were there before we knew it. This time, we've been playing festivals from the beginning, and now we've got a stadium show waiting for us at the end. We've learnt new ways of playing live, new ways of presenting the stage, new ways of making people listen, so I hope we'll have more opportunities to play stadiums around the world. At the moment it's only in France and the UK, and in other countries it's still festivals or arenas. After doing it this time, we want fans in other countries to be able to see a show of this scale. I think there have been milestone shows with this band that have represented that. For example, we played our first arena show in France, and the first time we headlined a festival was Glastonbury.」

Incidentally, when we spoke to you last summer, you said: "We have a lot of good rock songs, but not many really great soft songs. I'd like to explore that area in the future." Has the vision for the new album become clearer since then? 「Right now, we have a lot of ideas, but we haven't decided which area we're going to go into yet. It's only when all three of us are together and we start rehearsing that we'll be able to see what's going on. We're on holiday at the moment and haven't played together for about a month. So I have no idea what the next album will sound like, but if I had to say, I think it will be an extension of Black Holes and Revelations. There are a couple of areas that I'd like to explore more with what I tried on that album, and other than that, I'd like to explore a more classically-infused rock sound. Another thing I'm thinking about at the moment is trying some of the new songs out live before we record them. We didn't do that with any of the songs on the last album, but this time we want to try them out live before we record them.」

Are there more shows planned for this summer? 「Yes, a few shows, really. Dubai, South America, and the V Festival in England. And a charity concert at the Albert Hall. So I'm hoping to try out some of the new songs live over the summer or so, to help me decide on the direction for the next album before I record it.」

Apart from that, do you intend to concentrate on the new album this year? 「Yes, we're building our own studio at the moment, so for the first time we'll be able to work in our own studio. So we don't have to worry about time as much as we used to, and we're going to be able to try out more things than usual, which I'm really looking forward to. In fact, I'm looking forward to trying things out and seeing what new things emerge, so I want to be open to that possibility, and in that sense I don't want to go in too detailed a direction at this point. We're going to try all sorts of things this time, and if the result is a completely unexpected style or sound, then I'll be very happy about that.」

DOMINIC HOWARD INTERVIEW

What is the most powerful feedback moment in the memory of 160,000 people over two days at Wembley? 「I'll never forget being extremely nervous before the show. When I got in front of everyone at the stadium, I thought my heart was going to burst out of my chest (laughs). But at the same time I was really excited, and when the show started and I saw how the audience got really excited, all the nerves I had been feeling blew away. I realised that if I didn't have time to be nervous, I should just enjoy it as much as possible, and in fact, the performance went well and the audience got really excited, so it was great. I was just full of emotion from the beginning to the end. Also, the acrobats hung from balloons and danced on top of the crowd, which was great. It was a nice moment for us to take a breather and watch them dance while we played. Those two nights were amazing, all three of us were on a high for weeks afterwards (laughs).」

At the same time, is there anything you couldn't see from the stage that day that you didn't realise until you saw this video? 「Over the months after the show, I watched the footage of those two nights closely……. I also watched a lot of the footage that people had uploaded on YouTube themselves. Most of them were taken by phone and they were all great, but at the same time shocking. It was intense, emotional and…… Because the footage itself is terrible, but it's all from the perspective of someone who was there as an audience member, and some of them were crowd surfing, some of them were jumping up and down the whole time, and some of them were singing much louder than the band the whole time, and it was quite a sight for me to see them like that. I was like, "Who the hell are these guys?" (laughs). Watching some of those videos and seeing so many people enjoying our shows, of course you can see that from the stage, but seeing our gigs again from the audience's own perspective, I was overwhelmed. To think that we were able to connect with that many people was really inspiring.」

Was the decision to release Wembley 2 Days on DVD made before the show? 「It wasn't clear at first, but we did get the recording right. But that's something we do all the time, so it's not like this time was special. So, a little after the show, we watched the recorded footage again and there were a lot of really good moments…… I'm not talking about our own performance, but there was a lot of footage that really captured the atmosphere of the stadium that night. You could feel the energy of the people who were there, that kind of realistic footage. At the time, all three of us were on a high from the aftermath of that gig, so we were like, "We have to release this!" (laughs) But playing a show of that scale in that stadium was an important milestone for the band, and we wanted to share it with the audience, even if they were the only ones there to see it.」

What was the most difficult part of the stage design? 「The width of the stage was quite wide, so I wasn't sure if HAARP would be able to fill the space. I was also worried about the fact that there was no roof on the stage (laughs). It was a completely open stage and there was no roof, so we had to light the stage from the side or from below, and the thing that worried me the most was the rain. But luckily it didn't rain, so that was good. Still, simply getting everything to run smoothly was a lot of work in itself, and we also had to create new visuals for the screen, introduce new camera technology, and in any case introduce a lot of different things that we hadn't done before and make them our own in a short period of time, so it was quite a challenge.」

Which songs have you been most satisfied with in terms of the quality of your live performances? 「First of all, "Stockholm Syndrome". That song always sounds good no matter what venue we play it in (laughs). It was perfect this time, it was a lot of fun to play and I also really liked the way it was captured on film. The visuals on the screen, which looked like an old video game from the 80s, suited the song. The number itself is full of energy and chaos like that. Also, "Knights of Cydonia" was pretty good. The crowd was so excited, partly because it was the opening number, and when the riff came in towards the end of the song, everyone was going crazy, and I almost stopped playing because it was so loud (laughs). I also like "Blackout". It was a different atmosphere because of the acrobats, and it was nice to have the crowd's attention shifted away from us and relax a bit.」

At the beginning of the show, the three of you walk from the centre of the arena to the stage through the flower aisle, right in the middle of the audience, just like Moses splitting the sea. If you had to describe in one word the emotions that were swirling around inside you as you walked over there, what would it be? 「I remember very well that everyone was screaming like crazy, it was all so surreal. I don't know if it was happening in real life or not. At the same time, I remember I was really excited and getting really pumped up. As I walked around looking at everyone's faces at close range, I was getting more and more excited. But it's a really bizarre experience to have someone shout at you that close up (laughs).」

(laughs). From your vantage point on the drum set, how well could you see the audience? 「I could see pretty well. In the first half the sun was still bright. I try to look further away from the audience, not at the front row. That way I check the whole scene, rather than just looking at certain people. But you might think it's surprising, but at that show I could see quite well from here. Right down to the last row of the stadium. At a normal gig, you can hardly see anything because of both the darkness and the glare from the lights, so in that sense, it was good this time. Also, some of the songs were pre-decided so that the audience would be illuminated. Well, we always do that, but this time we wanted to see how the crowd was getting into it, so we did that more often than usual. That's why I was a bit scared when I saw them (laughs). When the stadium gets dark, you can't see anything, but then suddenly the lights come on and the whole place comes to life. That was an unforgettable sight.」

On the other hand, there is a negative image of stadium rock as a product of 'old-fashioned rock'. What did Muse prove with this Wembley 2-Day show? 「I think that stadium rock may have been popular in the 80s, but nowadays there are more and more people who want to see good live acts. In the same vein, I think stadium rock is becoming cool again. We'll make it cool again (laughs). But it's true that a lot of bands are actually playing big concerts, like Coldplay, Radiohead, and Arctic Monkeys. So I think the trend of the times, or what people want to see, is moving in that direction. We were the first band to play at the stadium, so I guess that's pretty good (laughs).」

Is the overwhelming dramaturgy of the Muse sound in part 100% possible because of the extreme size of the stadium? 「Yes. Especially with some of the songs, the huge space made it possible to showcase them even more than usual…… The songs that were originally large in scale filled the space well, and the ones that weren't, at least they didn't get overshadowed by the venue. At the same time, how we played those songs was also important. In fact, we play a bit differently than usual, for example, our gestures are naturally larger to fill a larger space. In that way, it's all up to you. How to show and make people listen in that much space. On the other hand, in a smaller space, I can play like I'm being wrapped up. So in short, it doesn't matter how big the venue is, it's important to adapt ourselves to the place.」

Would you say the Wembley Stadium show was a milestone for the band Muse? What are your next goals? 「For now, I guess it's just finishing the next album (laughs). I'm going to concentrate on that this year. We've done two stadium nights here at Wembley and one in Paris, but it feels like we're not done yet (laughs). The production was good, the stage design was pretty cool, and I think it's a shame that it only ended with those three shows, and I'd like to do more in the future if the opportunity arises.」

Translator's Note: A short interview, but a good one.

[miyakuli]

Pocket Mirror ~ GoldenerTraum

Mirror, Mirror on the wall

Pocket Mirror is a horrific game in which we follow a young girl with amnesia who is lost in a gloomy, absurd world and tries to escape through a series of puzzles. While the aesthetics and atmosphere of the universe won me over completely, I have more reservations about the writing and the emotions it seeks to convey.

❤ Let's start with the game's biggest strength: the atmosphere is insane (literally). The pixel art is highly detailed, the lighting effects are magnificent, the scenery can go from cute and neat to chaotic and sinister, and the light animations are dynamic and often bloodcurdling effective. I also loved the contrast between the horrific aspect of the scenes and the cute chara-design of the characters, a bit like Puella Magica for those in the know. There are also quite a few visual ideas that play on this contrast of tone to make you feel extremely uncomfortable, without resorting to easy jump scares or excess hemoglobin. ❤ The sound atmosphere is not to be outdone either. The music is memorable, adding a touch of mystery and disquiet to the exploration of the rooms. But the game also relies on scary sound elements (footsteps, evil laughter etc…) as well as moments of oppressive silence, which worked extremely well on me x) ❤ The gameplay is fairly varied overall, with exploration, puzzles, chases (I hated every second of it), mini-games, etc. I never felt redundant during my game.

+/- The game's puzzles take two forms: on the one hand, there's the rpg aspect, with objects to find to interact with elements of the setting; on the other, there are text-based riddles in the style of Sphynx. The difficulty can alternate between easy and a little more intermediate, which provides a bit of a challenge, but I found some of the titles very confusing and their solutions sometimes convoluted. +/- The story is captivating from the start. We face all these horrific events without understanding anything, totally perplexed like our MC who has lost her memory. But this confusion lasts right up to the end, in fact, because the scenario remains far too ambiguous, and even though the game hints at some answers here and there, it ends with a feeling of incompleteness. I did understand the underlying plot, but the way the game skims over the truth left me rather indifferent in the end. +/- The characters are excellent in their creepiness, but we don't get attached to them at all. And yet the game seems to want us to feel something, given certain scenes where the heroine sincerely tries to create a bond with them....but it just doesn't work. First of all, the main girl is just too bland and interacts with everyone in the same way (all sweet and naive) which, in my opinion, doesn't create any real chemistry with the other girls. But on top of that, these ones have very short "arcs" where we're more often dealing with their demonic character than their more human side, and as a result, I find myself rather indifferent to their fate. +/- There's a good amount of replayability given the various endings, but there's no quick skip for the dialogue and some of the cut scenes…and some of the endings are hard to reach without reading a guide, which is a shame.

✖ The game has a lot of game-overs, which isn't a bad thing in itself, but some of them occur after actions based on chance (for example, you take the wrong direction in a corridor and you die, or you make the wrong choice in a dialogue that didn't indicate any fatal fate). It wouldn't have bothered me so much if the save points weren't so far away from these events, as it often means having to take again a long path or even a cut scene that you can't always get past. It got very tiresome at times. ✖ I've got nothing against dubbing in onomatopoeia, but the little laughs and giggles from the damsels are far too frequent and almost annoying. ✖ I find the object interface a bit messy and not quickly accessible.

I was totally drawn into the world of this game, and it succeeds perfectly in its aim of making its audience both nervous and enchanted by this hellish wonderland. But it left me on the side of the road when it came to its story and its characters, who were a little too elusive for my taste.

➡ My Steam page

[destinyc1020]

My Movie Review: "A Quiet Place: Day One" 🤫

**Caution...May Contain Some Spoilers**

Hey everyone! I'm back with another movie review! 😁

Soo.... I had the chance to catch "A Quiet Place: Day One" in theaters this weekend, and here are my thoughts! First of all, this is one summer blockbuster that I was definitely looking forward to on my list! My friends and I had all seen Parts 1 and 2, so we were definitely excited to see how it all began. 😊

PROS

First of all, can I just say?? I LOVE Lupita Nyong'o. 😊 Anytime I see her onscreen, I'm reminded of just how great of an actress she is! She always shines bright in every role she's given, and she's extremely believable. You could literally feel her fear, shock, terror, and sadness throughout this film! This woman definitely earned her Oscar win years ago (just sorry that it was for that slave movie 😒), and I'm always excited to see what new projects she does next.

Djimon Hounsou is another one.... Anytime he's in a movie, I KNOW his acting is not going to disappoint lol. 😅 It was cool finally getting to see both Lupita and Djimon in a film together. It's just such a shame that they shared such little screen time together. 🥴

The acting was great in this. Everyone did a great job and pulled their own weight.

The music was beautiful in this film. I listen to musical scores in films (I'm a geek, I know lol 😜) and it was very moving.

I loved the chemistry between Lupita's character and Joseph Quinn's character. I had never seen any of his films before (at least, I don't think so? 🤔), so it was nice seeing him onscreen and witnessing his interactions with Lupita. Their chemistry wasn't even anything romantic or sexual onscreen, but they had really great platonic chemistry together! 😊

CONS

I must say.... I think I was expecting this film to be a little more scary than it actually was lol? 😅 I was bracing myself to be pretty scared like I was for the first two films, but all in all, the film wasn't really all that scary?? There were some great jump scares throughout, but nothing that really had me getting creeped out, or reaching for my friend's sleeve lol. 😅

This movie was actually a lot sadder than I thought it would be? Idk if that was a pro or a con lol, but I guess I was expecting it to be more action, but in reality, it was quite slow-moving....and sad. The end especially was kind of sad. 😢 Don't get me wrong, it was a very beautifully-shot film, and it really was touching, but a film that you're thinking is mainly going to be about aliens invading turns out to be more about grief, death, and moving on from the past. 😢

I was definitely entertained with this film, but I feel like I didn't really learn much about the aliens? I thought in this film (since it's a prequel) we were going to learn a little more about WHY they invaded, what they were after, and maybe a little more backstory? I guess my assumption was all wrong lol. 😅

OVERALL

Overall, this is a fun movie if you just want to go out and have some fun with your friends. Although I didn't find it all that "scary" (and I'm usually a scaredy cat lol 😅), there are quite a few jump scares and "gotcha!" moments in the film to keep you thrilled and entertained. I would say that this film was more suspenseful than it was "scary". The film was really enjoyable though! That's all I ask from a movie honestly lol.

I wish I had been warned that this film was more sad than it was scary lol. It was beautifully shot, and the way it handles death, grief, and the loss of a loved one is great. Lupita, Joseph, and Djimon all do some superb acting in this one, so if you're a fan of either of them, then by all means, go check this one out! 😁 Lupita especially is so good of an actress. I love the fact that she ventures out of the usual norm and isn't afraid to do horror films, thriller films, suspense films, etc....all genres that historically, black women have usually been missing in. So, I like that she takes risks and isn't afraid to do those types of films, even though she's already an Oscar Winner. 😁

This film waws NOT directed by Jon Krasinski, and I think I could tell lol. I know he was busy filming something else, so he couldn't direct this one (which is fine). I kind of think that the small-town aspect made the other two films way more scary than the NYC setting. I know it makes sense since the city is way louder than the country lol, but you know what I mean lol....

OVERALL SCORE: 7.5/10