#i mean my choice is ALWAYS gonna be a milkshake

[shu-of-the-wind]

ID: a tweet by @ErinChack which reads "once again it is 4pm, too early for a beer, too late for a coffee, and so i find myself roaming on the streets desperate to spend $8 on a mysterious third beverage"

[sanguineterrain]

Hey, I love your writing, your Jason fics are always so tender and authentic

I was wondering if you would write something where Reader is pulled aside by someone and asked whether they're in danger (since Jason is pretty big and intimidating) and later they laugh it off because they find it absurd but it gets to Jason and perhaps brings some insecurities to the surface

this is actually devastating!!! thank you for requesting 🤌

jason todd x gn!reader. tw: wrongly assumed abuse and jason being gutted at the idea, hurt/comfort, reassurance, estab relationship.

****

"Chocolate is obviously superior."

Jason sighs, flopping against the diner booth dramatically. "What a shame to be so wrong. Vanilla stays on top."

"Vanilla is boring as hell, Jay," you say, throwing your napkin at him. He catches it. Of course. "On the milkshake hierarchy, vanilla is barely a step above whatever monstrosity a peppermint bark shake is."

"Buddy, I happen to like drinking toothpaste." He points a finger at you. "And that's my God-given right."

"It's an abomination is what it is." You take a long, pointed sip of your shake. "Mm, the taste of good choices."

Jason traps both of your legs between his under the table. You gasp and try to wiggle free, but his strength is merciless.

"If it's an abomination, why is it on the menu?" he asks, grinning as you squirm.

"Well, what else are they meant to serve you freaks?"

Jason gently tugs you forward by your legs. He leans over the table. You meet him halfway.

"This freak appreciates the thought," he says and kisses you.

He tastes like vanilla shake. It's not what you'd order, but you really don't mind kissing it off of Jason's mouth. Funny how that works.

He pulls away and releases your legs, then scoots out of the booth.

"Gonna take care of business. Don't drink my incredibly irresistible shake."

"I'll certainly try," you say, looking up at him with what are undoubtedly giant heart eyes.

Jason disappears to the restrooms. You drink your shake and focus on trying to craft the straw wrapper into a snake.

You're close to shaping it when a woman comes up to your table. You've never seen her in your life.

"Uh, hi," you say. "Can I help you?"

She glances around the diner before leaning down.

"Hey. Look, if you're... in need of someplace safe, there's a great shelter downtown."

Your brows rise. "I'm sorry?"

"I was in your shoes once too," she says, eyes wide. "You don't have to rely on a guy to get you on your feet. Especially someone like him."

You shake your head slowly. "I... what? I don't understand. The man I'm with, he's my boyfriend."

She looks skeptical. You turn to face her fully, because now you're properly bewildered.

"Uh, I appreciate that you're looking out for people, and I know stuff you're referring to is everywhere in Gotham. But I promise I'm okay."

"I know physical intimidation is scary—"

"Whoa." You hold up a hand. "Just because he's a big guy doesn't mean he's throwing me around. He's the gentlest man you'll ever meet. I love him and he loves me. No one is in danger."

The woman's mouth pinches. You don't even have it in you to be upset. You've never once felt afraid of Jason. But you forget how he looks to others, how he's twice or triple most people's size and covered in scars.

"Here's the number to the shelter," she says, slipping the paper under the salt shaker. "In case you change your mind."

She hurries out the door before you can respond. You stare at the card, then shrug. You suppose, if anything, you're happy there are still good Samaritans in Gotham.

Presently, Jason returns. He purposely makes his footsteps heard because of the countless times you've lectured him about scaring the shit out of you due to his habit of going stealth mode without realizing.

"Hello, dearest," he says. "I've returned from war."

"My hero. Did you wash your hands in battle?"

Jason slides into the booth and sticks his hand in your face. "Smell 'em and rejoice, baby."

You take his hand and give it a deep sniff. It indeed smells like soap. Not that you ever doubted your boyfriend's handwashing capabilities.

"Smells like... wrong opinions about milkshakes," you say, then kiss his palm.

He rolls his eyes. "I can see my absence has taught you nothing. Unfortunate."

"I'm stubborn. I'm sure you of all people can understand that," you say, smiling.

"Mm. Y'lucky you're cute."

Your food arrives, the waitress cheerily informing you that she hopes you enjoy your meal.

"I think she's the happiest person in Gotham," Jason says, shaking the ketchup bottle.

You take a fry from his plate. "Probably a Metropolis native."

"Y'know my fries are the exact same as yours, right?"

"Nope," you say. "Yours have special boyfriend cooties on them. Adds flavor."

"You're gross," Jason says, quite lovingly.

You make a heart with your hands. He returns it, then takes a bite of his burger.

You don't even register it when Jason grabs the salt shaker. You're zeroed in on your lunch and don't look up until he speaks.

"What's this?"

Jason's holding the shelter hotline card.

"Oh! Some lady came over and gave that to me."

"Gave it to you?"

You should clock Jason's tone and the way he's stopped eating completely. But the experience was so odd that you can't fathom Jason thinking it as anything but a mistake.

"Yeah. For some reason, she thought I was here drinking a milkshake with you against my will. Probably 'cause it's Gotham, and you're my BBB: big beefcake boyfriend. Little does she know, I'm the heavyweight boxing champion of Park Row."

You swirl your fries in Jason's ketchup. He doesn't even blink. Usually, he'd give you a raised eyebrow and pretend he's cross.

Jason's still staring at the card. You catch his legs with yours. He doesn't look up.

"Jay?" you ask, smile fading. You drop your legs. "Hey. Y'good?"

"Hm? Oh. Sorry, baby." He puts the card aside and smiles at you, quick and strained.

"Everything okay?" you ask.

"Yeah. Uh, fine."

"Jason." You lean over and grab his hand. "What's wrong?"

He swallows. You wait, the noise of the diner fading. All that matters is whatever's causing his absolutely heartbreaking expression.

"How could she think I'm hurting you?" Jason whispers, finally looking at you. "How could—I would never hurt you."

"Oh, Jay. Honey, that's why I hardly entertained her. It was so silly to think about. I was so puzzled at first that I couldn't even decipher what she meant."

"But what if... y'know, maybe she sensed something about me. Sensed violence. I get it. I'd–I'd be scared of me if I were a regular person."

"Jason, sweetie, no. No, no, no. I think that woman experienced some hard things in her life, and that caused her to see something that wasn't there. She had good intentions, but she was absolutely wrong. I know you have a past, but I've never felt unsafe with you. Never. I could never be afraid of you."

Jason gnaws on the inside of his cheek. You get up and slide in next to him, crowding him against the wall. You curl against his arm.

"You love me so well, I forget that most people see a monster when I walk down the street," he says.

You squeeze your eyes closed. Pins in your heart.

"You're not a monster, Jay. You're good. I know it. Your family knows it. You're a protector."

He takes a deep breath. "If–if you ever felt afraid of me, ever, and you wanted me to stay away, then you tell me so, and I'd leave you alone. No questions asked."

"Jason," you whisper. You wrap your arm around his neck and pull him close. The vinyl squeaks as you shift. "Jay, I love you. I don't want you to leave me alone."

"But if—"

"No. Please listen to me. I know you'd never hurt or frighten me. Sometimes, people are wrong. She was wrong about you. She was kind but wrong."

You sit like that for a bit, feeling each other breathe. Jason's hand grazes yours. You grab it, lacing your fingers together.

"I love you too," he says quietly. "Never felt anything but love for you."

You smile and steal another fry off his plate. He snorts.

"I know." You lean against his shoulder. "Never doubted it."

[colourstreakgryffin]

asks are open!😘 How would L lawliet react with a shy I mean very shy girlfriend shes short about 5'2. And recently joined the task force to help her boyfriend

💕L💕

Omllll yeeessss! Another Death Note request! Let’s go, I like L too and I was waiting for him! Let’s do it!

Lawliet L

L was very against you trying to join the Task Force. This is definitely the most dangerous case in human history and you’re the last person he wants to risk to try solve it. He doesn’t care to risk his own life, but not yours

When L loves something or someone, it’s permanent and it’s strong, he was very against Watari joining, but he knows he needs Watari and the older man is not as included. L is a stubborn man and he won’t fold to your persistence

How did you manage to get onto the Task Force? L had no choice but to let you join, Light already seen you and his hands were tied by the members thinking a new Detective has joined. He couldn’t fly you out since it’d draw far too much suspicion. For the first time ever, the world’s best detective was stunned as he had to agree on terms he didn’t make

L supposes he doesn’t really mind having you around, it’s bad but not as bad. You’re intelligent, your skilled and you know how to handle yourself. Though, he isn’t a fan of you being apart of the Kira case for obvious reasons

Repeat it, L loves short girls so his significant other being shorter than him is like his actual dream. They are cuddle-sized and easy to keep track off. Even with how hunched he is, L is still packing quite the height and he towers you so suspect him to rest his chin on your head

“Aaah~ my favourite pillow has arrived. I am aware that I’m using your head as a headrest, you’re a suitable ‘small bean’ for the task. Why yes, I do remember what people your height are called and I’m called a ‘beanstalk’”

L is not a teaser about height, he’s a helper. You’re struggling to reach something high, he’ll get it for you. He will analyse the situation and suggest using a step next-time but at the end of the situation, he’ll help in anyway he can

L is a introvert so he understands your overall timidity. If you don’t want to be around the others, he will set up a private room for you that none of the members can access, including him if wanted. He has the money and power to do whatever the fuck he wants, and he is the spoiling type of boyfriend

Yes, I mean that L would send you money if you need it, he will rush around the headquarters to find your favourite blanket, he’s out the door the moment you mention a milkshake you’re carving. He will do stuff for you since you do so much for him, by merely being apart of his life and changing from him a glorified machine to a real human

The way you shyly approach him and Light to hand over the documentation files Watari gave to you whilst he was baking, is just so cute. Internal L is laying on the floor joyous at how adorable you behave, whilst external is politely thanking you

L isn’t built with any muscles(besides dem legs for real) but he isn’t above being protective over you, because he is. Light scared you with that one time he impersonated Kira to a horrifyingly good degree, L is gonna calmly argue with him then get into a fight

“Light. Could you please silence your strangely accurate impersonation of Kira. You’re frightening Dokusha— Hm? What reason do I have to ask of such a request? Well. She’s my partner in business and in life, she is important. Don’t do anything like that again”

L is slowly growing accustom to affection, please give him a break if he doesn’t respond or give it back. He does like it, he just isn’t trained nor knowledgeable enough in couple things. He puts research on those topics into his list so he can do better for you

Though, nobody else can do these things with L. Hold his hand, brush his hair, hug him. Nothing like that is allowed for anybody besides you and well to a degree, Watari but that’s different. You are always allowed in his private research room, most of the time, he wants you there besides him as he works

A cute weird thing L lets you do is latch onto his back. He does have a BAD back from the ten+ years of hunching but he loves feeling you clung onto him like a Koala. You are too shy to do it around the members but that won’t stop L from throwing you onto his back himself. He misses it

L keeps track of everything you like, do and more. He basically has a encyclopaedia of you and can recall every little detail. To him, knowing you like the process of scrubbing through hours worth of camera footage, is important as it shows how devoted he is to you

So tell him everything. He won’t forget any piece of info and he’ll write it down later as a needed backup, like he does for everything else non-Dokusha related. There’s two parts of his mind; Detective and Dokusha. He likes the Dokusha section a lot more

L is very loyal. Do you think he has anybody else waiting? Most women call him a freak for his looks and/or behaviour. You’re his one and only, he can’t throw you away, he just wants you sat besides him all the time. Where he can turn around and know you’re still with him

L shares his sweets with you more, as compared to somebody like Light, and you know he’ll get Watari to deliver whatever you want, whilst the other members get only what L requests for them. You are treated specially and he could care less that it makes him seem favouritistic, he is

L has a habit of mimicking you, kinda like a child. He follows you since your word is a lot more trustworthy. When you eat vegetables and meats with a smiley reaction, he is eating it too whilst waiting for your praise (Watari would struggle here, and he is a bit frustrated that his son listens to his gf, not his father

“Good morning— hm? I seem frustrated. Well… I am. Why is that? Don’t pretend like you don’t know the answer to that question, Dokusha. Yes, yes. I understand you fully. You don’t want me to die but this is my profession, and you shouldn’t be apart of this case. It’s too dangerous, you know how intense my feelings for you are”

[these-emo-thoughts]

Pit Babe Anniversary Rewatch! Episode 2!

Getting into the end of Week 1 of the Pit Babe 1st anniversary rewatch just in time by finishing off my day with Episode 2! Looking very forward to this one fajsdfahkhs thoughts as I watch will be down below!

Okay yes I'll be changing my phone ring tone to Speed of Love, I'm too far own this rabbit hole lol

Oh we start off with Tony and his interview lsjdfalsfsa

Tony has perfected the "smile that doesn't reach your eyes" trope, he looks like he just wants to murder that reporter asking him all these questions

That direct look into the camera when talking about "old racer" Babe 👀

Uncle Alan always so caring, worrying about Babe being okay instead of the race betting 🥹

First "Daddy" of the series

Nefarious plot and flashback, ugh yes, sign me the tf up (again)

I mean look, Kenta managing to hold back Alpha Babe is pretty solid of him LOL

I love Babe's confidence, like even though he's got those bad memories he's not afraid to face up against his adoptive father

THE SHOULDER TOUCH, WAY 😭😭 BABE LOOKS LIKE HE'S UNDER A SPELL HERE, GOD, THE SIGNS FROM THE BEGINNING ARE SO BRILLIANT

Far out I'm not going to shut up about this am I??

Again tho, it has to be said - Alan in a singlet top 😔👌

And now Babe and Charlie in a singlet tops 😔👌

Of course Babe can't resist such a sunshine smile, man is already so smitten even while brooding and I totally get it haha

JEFF!! AHH! THERE'S OUR BABY BOY DRINKING HIS PINK MILKSHAKE!! 😭

Lol I can't, every time I see 'UAC' I think of University Admissions Centre 🤣

Damn Kenta is doing the work - and he looks so happy too he probably thinks this is gonna make Tony love him

This obsession with cars of any kind amuses me but like, I also wanna build a track and play too 🥲

BRUH the omegaverse, I know I watched this entire thing but I still get so 😮 when I see it manifest on my screen, what a time to be alive

Puppy Charlie 🐶 these two are so cat and dog coded

There he is, there's baby boy Jeff coming to save the day 🥹

Show 'em Jeff, show 'em how good you are and get that job!!! Haha I'm writing him so much more insecure in my current fic but I love seeing him so confident in himself here ahaha

The duck under Alan's arm kills me

LMAO Dean, North, Sonic please, laughing like that at poor Alan who can't even get a handshake 😭

LMAO I forgot Babe calls Jeff cute here, and Way too like almost winks at him, bb boy is just too adorable 😭

I'm like honed into whatever North and Sonic are doing in the background at any given moment, js

Look at North, such a gossip lol

But also the instigator, damn, Babe is not playing

He also says he's not jealous that Charlie is talking to Jeff but we all know that's a lie lol

He also says he's not angry but welp, LOL

Again with Babe's jealousy, look how happy Charlie looks about it AHAHA

I actually do like that Babe is teaching Charlie in between all the 'concetration' he does

KIMMMMMM WHAT'S UP BOY!! WELCOME

Winner, I can't believe by this point you've been on my screen longer than bb Jeff AHAHAH

Winner: *Trash talks Babe into fighting with him* Also Winner: *Sics Kim on Charlie*

The attraction that Babe has for Charlie in this moment is peak *chef's kiss*

This is a great fight scene actually goddamn

AYEE go go Charlie

Winner once again losing at life (I'm going to keep a tally, this is loss number 3 for him so far in the series since he copped it twice already in the first episode AHAHA)

Bad idea to be smacking Kim against the wall, Winner 👀

Told you, there goes your fkn wrist babes do I could this as a loss for the tally AHAHA

AYEEE CHARLIE IS GETTING HIS CAR! 🙌 and what a choice he makes, the car that made Babe King of the Hallows

Way is quaking

There's gotta be a work for the kink Charlie has for Babe's coaching because he's really enjoying himself but I'd be crying 🤣😭

Dean is so chill, but look at how his words are cutting Way deeply haha

UGH MY HEART HURTS AT THIS BEAUTIFUL FRIENDSHIP BETWEEN WAY AND BABE AHHHHH WHY 😭😭

PLEASE that kiss Babe planted on Way's cheek healed my soul 😭

"Alai-wa"

"You're my best friend but complain like my boyfriend" lmao Way WISHES 😭

Here are the terrible two ready to cause trouble! Now being asked to keep an eye on Charlie.

Charlie has been called a puppy 3 times this episode ahaha

North is drunk but can see clearly that Way loves Babe

NORTH SAYING IF HE AND SONIC WERE EVER CLOSER THEY'D BE LOVERS 👀👀👀

Poor Alan lmao everyone always laughing at him

Way switches from supportive friend to bitch real quick and I'm here for it - but goddamn, he's harsh to Charlie

WAY HATES CHARLIE SO MUCH HE LITERALLY TELEPORTED TO INTIMIDATE HIM 🤣

I swear to god I was not planning on thirsting over Alan while rewatching this but lo and behold here I am. Thirsting.

Kenta, baby, sorry but Alan is not going to give you his son Pit Babe, no matter how much you offer - though that is a great way to end the episode ahh 👀

PETE IN THE PREVIEW YESSSS the family's all here!!

ALAN GIVING JEFF A KISS ON THE HEAD JKSFHSKJADHFJSKA

The no-kissing rule gets broken next ep, YESHH

And my favourites, the behind the scenes 🥹

Ep 2 is done!! Right in time for Week 2 of the anniversary event, yay!

[apomaro-mellow]

Part 2

"Steve, that Byers boy is here for you.”

Steve was in the middle of clearing the dishes from breakfast when he heard. “Okay.”

“We’ll be back late tonight. Money for the landscapers is by the door.”

Jonathan came in just as the man walked out, brow furrowed. “Who the heck was that?”

“Uh, my dad?”

“Is you say so. Look, we gotta hash this thing out. No one else but Dustin was supposed to know.”

Steve leaned back against his sink. “Yeah but if we tell everyone we were lying, then we’re back to square one.”

“You’re back to square one. As I recall, this was a Steve problem.”

“Here’s the thing about problems, they can spread to other people. Like if Dustin continues to pester me about dating, maybe I stop being so generous with my car. Maybe those kids will have to hound someone else for rides.” Steve raised his eyebrows at Jonathan.

Jonathan rubbed at his face. “Everyone else is gonna know by now.”

“I know, I’m sorry. I’ll make it up to you.”

“Yeah you will.”

---------------------------------

Eddie was in the middle of walking down the street, ignoring the dirty looks when who should he see, sipping milkshakes but the new set of lovebirds. He knew most people thought of him as shady so he had no shame ducking behind a mailbox to watch them from across the street.

To most, it definitely looked like just a couple of guys being pals. And before, Eddie would have seen it like that too. But now that he knew the truth about their relationship, he couldn’t help but read more into Steve’s smile.

And Jonathan seemed relaxed in a way that he only got when he was high. Just what in the world did they talk about when they were alone?

“I wanna go. And I wanna study photography. But like, how do I explain that to my mom?”

“You think she’s gonna fight you or something?”, Steve asked.

“No, not really. If anything, she’ll be mostly supportive. But unless you’re a big name, you can’t make a lot of money. And I know that’s gonna be her first thought. ‘How are you gonna pay your bills? Or tuition?’ That kind of thing.”

“I mean, personally, I wasn’t always a fan of your work. But if you have a dream, you should go for it. Even if you failed, at least you tried. I don’t even have...” Steve trailed off and swirled his shake around.

“Have, what?”

“Even if I could get into college, what would I even do?”

“Sorry man, I’m not a career counselor”, Jonathan said.

“You’re supposed to offer solutions and ways to help solve my problems. Some boyfriend you are.”

“Bring it up with the Better Business Bureau.”

Eddie bit his fist as he watched them. And things just went downhill after that. Whenever Steve and Jonathan were around, and they were surrounded only by their closest friends, they were holding hands. Or they were standing really close together, or sitting really close. And Eddie couldn’t stand it. It sort of felt like Jonathan had stolen his spot. But could he really claim something that he’d never had?

Meanwhile, Steve was putting up an impressive front but only because he was avoiding alone time with Robin like the plague. Which she could tell he was doing so she had no choice but to corner him. Her plan involved going into his room, stealing some of his hair products, and waiting.

And like clockwork, he realized he was out, went to the store, and Robin trapped him in aisle 6.

“Spill the beans, Harrington.”

Steve looked down at his basket of products, then Robin, and realized he’d been played.

“Robin, seriously? You know better than to mess with my hair.”

“And you know better than to keep secrets from me. Especially secrets like this.”

“Please tell me you still have my stuff and didn’t just dump it.”

“Of course I do. I’m not an evil witch.”

“Good.” Steve began to put the products back on the shelf. She may have been conniving, but at least she didn’t make him spend extra money. It was only when they were back in his car that she started the conversation again.

“You and Jonathan....makes zero sense. Especially since you’re straight.”

“Who said I’m straight? I’m allowed to appreciate guys.”

“Why didn’t you tell me sooner then? Hm?”

“Because!”, Steve shouted with fake indignation as he tried to stall for an explanation. “Because, I called one of your crushes a Muppet and I didn’t want you to tease me about Jonathan, okay?”

“Steven, I’m not a child. I don’t hold grudges like that. And Jonathan’s fine. Isn’t it weird though? To date the ex of your ex?”

“We’ve seen our fair share of weird stuff. Me and Jonathan don’t even make the top ten.”

“Point taken. So like...what do you like about him, I guess?”

Steve smiled at her attempt. “Are you trying to do guy talk?”

“Yes! I thought it might be doable since you’re gay but it’s still talking about dudes and I feel like I’m horribly out of my depth. How can you do girl talk so easy?”

“Well, I like both, so...”

“Bullshit.”

“How is that bullshit? I’ve dated girls and guys. Do you only like one kind of sandwich?”

Robin was quiet for a moment. “Just when I think I’m done discovering you, you get a little bit deeper.”

“I’m a man of many talents.”  

Part 4

[thetomorrowshow]

fighting back

Empires Superpowers au masterlist

this takes place about 4 months after the end of ‘poisoned rats’.

cw: food, flashbacks/panic attacks in a public place

~

“Here’s your menus, can I get you both something to drink?”

“Diet Pepsi, please,” Scott says, raising an eyebrow at Jimmy, who manages a stuttered, “Water, thank you.”

Scott nudges him after the waiter leaves. “Boring.” “Caffeine used to really screw with my powers,” Jimmy admits. “I haven’t had any in a long while, but I used to drink a bunch of Mountain Dew, and coffee every morning. Stopped when I was around twenty-three, I think.”

Scott leaves it at that, instead asking, “So you’ve never been to a restaurant before?”

“When I was a kid my parents would take Lizzie and me to, like, buffet places,” Jimmy shrugs. “But then my mom got really sick at one, and going out as a family to someplace nice was too expensive. So we got fast food drive-throughs on road trips or for celebrations, but not much else.”

“Criminal. What do you want to order?”

Jimmy thumbs through the plastic menu, biting his lip. “Um. Not sure. Do I have to get from—”

“Here are your drinks,” the waiter interrupts, placing a tall glass of soda in front of Scott and a matching one in front of Jimmy. “I’ll be back in a few minutes for your order!”

“Thanks so much,” Scott says, Jimmy echoing him. He takes a sip of the water, ice clacking against his teeth.

It’s not a fancy restaurant, by any means. It’s a diner in a cheap part of town, a place that Scott had said has the best fries and milkshakes and had gotten very excited when Jimmy had said he’d never really been out to eat before. Jimmy’s fairly sure that Scott’s made a list of places to eat, to go along with all the sights Jimmy’s never seen and the foods Jimmy’s never tried.

There’s a decent crowd of people here, too, which is why Jimmy’s more put-out than anything else when he feels a hand run through his hair.

He jumps a little, glances around to make sure nobody is near him. Scott glances up at him, then back to the menu.

“I’m gonna get the roast beef sliders. Anything sound good to you?”

No flashbacks sounds good to him, but it doesn’t look like that’s going to happen, phantom fingers curling around his hair. He turns his eyes back to the menu, stares at it uncomprehendingly for a few moments. “Um, you pick,” he says, pushing the menu to Scott. “What’s good here?”

“Ooh, definitely the reuben if you like rye, but the turkey and swiss is always a safe choice. Good?”

“Mhm, sounds fine,” Jimmy mumbles. He tries to grab hold onto anything Scott had told him about the food here through the brain fog of flashbacks. “Uh, you said the fries are good?”

“Ooh yes, I’ll get us both fries and milkshakes. What flavor of milkshake?”

Jimmy can’t remember any ice cream flavor ever, suddenly. He checks the menu, picks the first thing he sees. “Vanilla?”

“Sure! I’ll match.”

As casually as he can manage, Jimmy slips an ice cube out of his glass, cradles it in the palm of his hand. It’s supposed to ground him, remind his body that he’s in the present. The hand in his hair stubbornly remains.

He holds onto the ice cube until it melts, dribbling water in a small pool on the table. It doesn’t do anything but make his hand burn with the cold.

He blinks rapidly, twitches his head several times to try and shake the hand away. His trained instincts are starting to settle in, his body going still. If he moves his head, he might get slapped.

“Everything okay?”

Jimmy smiles easily, brightly, in Scott’s direction. His boyfriend is giving him a concerned look, hand out for Jimmy to take. Jimmy takes it.

“I’m fine, babe. Just got a little lost in thought!”

The acting skills from that one role as Cod Number 3 in Empires South Middle School’s production of The Little Mermaid Jr are really paying off.

Scott’s face eases, just as he looks up to see the waiter approaching them. Jimmy orders with no issue, watches the very pretty way Scott’s eyes scrunch up as he pretends to examine the menu one last time before ordering.

That doesn’t get the hand out of his hair, though. Maybe he should buzz it. Shave his head. Nothing for phantom hands to touch.

The hand trails down to rub his shoulders and Jimmy knows that wouldn’t solve the problem.

The food arrives and Jimmy releases Scott’s hand to watch him for cues, not trusting his unstable mind to do things in the right order. Scott unwraps his silverware so Jimmy does so as well; Scott places his napkin on his lap and Jimmy follows suit.

Scott seems to enjoy his food, and Jimmy understands that his tastes good as well but it’s hard to process. Everything is hard to process. It’s too bright in here, too loud. A family with three shouting kids passes by and Jimmy can’t help but flinch away, a movement that he tries to suavely change into wrapping his arm around Scott’s shoulders.

Scott scoffs at him, wriggles out from under and gives him a quick peck on the lips. “How’s your food?”

“Good,” Jimmy responds automatically, taking another bite. The hand pulls hard enough on his hair that his head jerks back and he freezes, biting his lip. He’s not going to cry here. He just wants to enjoy a nice meal with his boyfriend. Why can’t he just have a good time?

“Scott, love?” Jimmy manages, the slightest tremble making its way into his voice. He gathers his courage before he’s too anxious to ask. “Could—could you touch my hair?”

Scott goes still. After a moment, he slowly turns to give him a concerned look. “Jimmy, your hair is off-limits. We set that boundary in place ages ago.”

Great, now Scott probably thinks something ridiculous, like he misses the feeling of horrible hands touching his hair. He doesn’t, he doesn’t at all—in fact, he’s so nervous about Scott touching him that he can feel himself begin to shake. He just needs a little push.

“I just—I—” he takes a calming breath, places his clenched hands on the table, “there’s—there’s a hand. In my hair. And I—I want a real one. So I can tell the difference.”

Scott’s eyes flick up, and Jimmy watches as his face morphs from confusion to understanding, then sorrow. “Oh, Jimmy. I’m sorry that’s happening.”

“Yeah, me too,” Jimmy grits out as the ghost hand yanks again. “The ice trick didn’t work, eating didn’t help, it started almost as soon as we got here and it just won’t go—”

“Shh, it’s okay, it’s okay,” Scott says, glancing around as Jimmy pulls at his face. He’s fine, he’s not freaking out. It’s just a flashback, just a stupid flashback, and he’s fine. He’s not—he’s not—

“We can get to-go boxes, eat later,” Scott offers, already looking to wave down a waiter. “Really, it’s fine—”

“No, I want—” he wants to have a good time with Scott, he wants to eat, he wants Xornoth to stop touching him— “I want to be here, can you—can we at least try?” he begs, peeking at Scott through his fingers. “Can you try touching my hair?”

Scott glances around again, frowning. “Jimmy, I—” he sighs, bites his lip— “Jimmy, we set up months ago that if you’re clearly distressed and want me to touch your hair, I’m supposed to say no. And baby, you’re crying.”

And now he’s crying. Great. He grinds the heels of his hands into his eyes, takes in a shuddering breath. “I didn’t want—I wanted it to be good—”

He can hear the panic in Scott’s voice when he speaks. “Jimmy, do you know where you are right now?”

“The diner, with you, and so many people watching—” he cuts himself off, buries his face in his arms. There’s so many people here, all staring at him as he has a breakdown over a stupid flashback that he knows isn’t actually happening but just can’t shake.

“I’ll get some to-go boxes, okay? We’ll go home—”

“But I want to stay,” Jimmy insists, and he just knows he sounds like a petulant child. “I want to eat out with you, I want you to not have to worry about me freaking out over nothing! I love you so much, I just wanted today to be normal. . . .”

Scott’s silent for a while as Jimmy sniffles into his sleeves. At some point a waiter approaches, asks Scott lowly if everything’s all right.

“We’re fine . . . no, he’s got PTSD . . . thank you for your service too. . . .”

Scott waits until the waiter leaves, lays his head down on the table beside Jimmy. “Hey,” he says quietly. Jimmy blinks at him through the tears.

“I won’t be upset if we have to leave. I just want you to be safe and happy. You’re not a burden to me—I want to spend time with you, and it doesn’t matter where.”

Jimmy closes his eyes briefly as the phantom hand falls again to his back, rubbing lightly. “Can—can you rub my back?” he asks, voice small.

Scott immediately complies, and the feeling of something real—someone real—touching him where the hand was makes the phantom sensation drift away, off into the air like it had never happened. He relaxes into Scott’s arm as his breathing begins to even out, tension seeping out of him.

“Told you,” he grumbles, pressing his head into Scott’s chest. Scott being there, his head up against Scott’s firm and real body, makes all the difference. “‘S gone now. Just needed you.”

Scott’s hand, still rubbing his back, pauses. “I—oh,” he says softly, resuming the backrub. “I’m really . . . I’m really happy you trust me in that way. I’m really happy I can help you.”

“Sorry for making a scene.”

“You don’t need to apologize for a thing, love. Flashbacks are nothing to be embarrassed about.”

Jimmy’s embarrassed anyway, certain that there are still eyes on him. He sighs, rubs his eyes before reaching for his plate. “Can we still stay? I want to.”

Scott gives him a once over, frowns. “Okay, but on one condition: if another flashback starts at any time, we’re leaving. All right?”

It’s the right choice to make, and Jimmy nods his agreement.

He’s still not used to luck being in his favor, but he doesn’t have another flashback, and he finds he can push through the exhaustion and enjoy dinner with his boyfriend.

There may be flashbacks, and panic attacks, but really? Everything . . . everything’s okay. For the moment, he’s happy, and he knows that a flashback is a minor setback.

He leans against Scott’s shoulder, sucking on his milkshake, and lets out a contented sigh. Everything’s okay.

[violivs]

NMTDaily: Summer Tips

- “I probably look awful” *is the world’s cutest human* Hero, please.

- Goddamn though, when I first watched this, summer still meant something. Summer still meant several months of no school and nothing much to do (*snort*) instead of just being that time of year when I still spend all my time working, it’s just hot outside. What is the passage of time?!

- Hero is sweet and nice but she is also loyal. She would only be that harsh with someone if she was doing it for Bea or Leo or Ursula, I think. I think her snapping at Ben to stop watching their videos and mentioning them in his is the meanest she’s ever been, and she still manages to deliver it almost like she’s letting him down easy! Incredible.

- Beatrice: *bitching about how awful Benedick’s vlog was*

Me: *kicking my feet and squealing* You’re gonna love that stupid face!

- “I hate that hill!” Creating another parallel between Bea’s videos and Ben’s. Now they’ve both complained about the hill. Just makes me think of Ben seeing Bea walking the hill and offering her a ride all faux-chivalrously and her furiously turning him down and keeping on walking. Wouldn’t be surprised if that just happened right before this video and that’s why she’s in a Mood to rant about him.

- She is so focused on hating Ben that she willingly called Hero riff-raff! That’s dedication lol

- I do get annoyed by any Shakespeare modern AU movie/book/series that changes the character names completely to sound more modern. So SO glad NMTD stuck with the canon names and leant into the Bene-dick jokes. Even if that euphemism wasn’t in use in his time, I still think it’s what Shakespeare would’ve wanted. 😆

- Benvolio! Hamlet reference!

- In a world where Much Ado doesn’t exist, I want to know where in the world the Hobbes parents found the name Benedick. I know they’re professors, so that’s how, but you know what I mean.

- “He’s not all bad!” See, Hero can only be so mean at a time before she goes back into nice mode. I love her.

- Obsessed with Bea and Ben having classes together and having to try to keep a lid on it and not just bother each other all the time. And them both not understanding why they just can’t help but react to each other, why they care so much about everything the other person does and says.

- Ben editing Bea’s homework annoyingly (lol, I desperately want to know exactly what “postmodern bullshit” he wrote too) and being “a walking textbook” is sooooo… he just loves to learn! About everything! And share what he learns with others! All I can think about is him biting off more than he can chew at school next year in Lolilo because he’s so enthusiastic about everything. And Bea is going to go from not wanting to hear a word he says to finding his passion for it all so endearing that she can’t bring herself to burst his bubble and just communicate about not wanting an LDR. 🥺 They already wreck me!

- “Do you think you always think before you speak?” Hero with the necessary call-out!

- “Mine’s vodka!” Lol

- Bea immediately correcting Hero and acting like a know-it-all about summer right after complaining what a know-it-all Ben is. Classic.

- *googles togs* oh, swimsuits, interesting

- “Scarves that shade your face” just really reminds me of a certain reason Hero from the play has to hide her face in the future… a reference?

- “you have a lovely face! Show the world your pretty face!” An iconic line!

- Another Bea/Ben parallel! Bea says she likes banana milkshakes, and in Vox Pops, Ben said his favorite food was bananas. Can’t believe I’ve never had them go for milkshakes on a date in a fic before, note to self.

- Bea’s tip IS legit. I also think of summer as the hell months, as she put it, and staying in the air conditioning is usually my coping mechanism of choice. Girl after my own heart.

- The cute little cursive note at the end! The Hero touch.

- I love this episode, and I love how Hero and Bea both enable each other and keep each other honest, and how they get along.

💖🦩🥭

[xxx-wounded-angel-xxx]

Thank you so much for answering my "Poly!Lost Boys x Male!Reader with anger issues." Request, I appreciate it! I like the headcannons so I was wondering if you were okay in writing a fic about it? It doesn't have to be super long, or anything and I don't want to stress, or force you into writing something you're not wanting to do. I was just wondering if you were okay with it! I really like your posts btw.<3 🍃anon

Thanks! I wrote quite quickly your Hcs this morning in the hospital waiting room as my doctor was late, so I wasn't entierly satisfied with it. I hope you enjoy this longer fic I based on it! It was nice to take a break from the Eddie in Santa Carla fic I'm currently working and kinda stuck on. I hope you enjoy this 🍃anon

Looking through the thrift store, you were on a hunt for a leather jacket. Your old one was too used, and to be honest with yourself it was also gifted to you by someone in your family you did not likes and it was getting hard to stand this jacket because of it.  You saw a nice brown one, but after trying it, it happened to be too big. You looked at a dark one just to notice how it was ripped on a sleeve. Putting it down, you were getting ready to give up, and wanted to leave the choice of your future beloved jacket to your dear boyfriends. With the good sense of style they had, you were sure your boys would choose something really cool for you, and it would be a nice memory tied to the piece of clothing.

The boys were the greatest thing that happened to you in a while. You met them, one night on the boardwalk. You had already heard of them, of course, the four bikers terrorizing the boardwalk, always touching each other, exchanging sloppy kisses between milkshakes and cigs. You were admiring them. They were hot, and so confident in their sexuality… you wished you were like them. And one night, they noticed you. They came to you, and flirted, and somehow at the end of the night you had four very hot boyfriends. You were proud to call them yours, and were even more to be theirs.  “Yeah, you thought, I’m gonna let them chose my jacket.”

But as you were turning to leave the shop, a surf nazi bumped archly in your shoulder, and started to talk to you as if it was your fault. You saw red, and in a burst of anger your fist collided with his face. It was over, your self-control had left the picture. You saw yourself launching punch after punch at him, and dodging the surfer’s attack the best you could. But as one of his friends joined the fight, you saw from the corner of your eyes blond curly hair joining on your side. You could always count on Marko to have your back when it came to fight.  The fight turned into general fight, Lost Boys against Surf Nazis, until you were separated and kicked out of the boardwalk by security guards.

Now calmed down, you knew that you could say goodbye to the boardwalk, at least for the night. You silently followed your boyfriends where they were heading to, feeling bad to have completely ruined the night with your impulsive behavior.

As you sat on the sand close to your boyfriends, by the bonfire they had gotten by making its precedent owner scram, you saw your Paulie turn to you. “You okay Sugar? You’ve been quite silent. They didn’t hurt you too bad, did they?” Worried, Paul started to look you up and down, looking for an injury.

“No babe, I’m okay. It’s just… I’m sorry for ruining the night” you blurted. It was now Dwayne’s turn to be worried. “What do you mean, love? I don’t get it”

“If I didn’t start this stupid fight with this scumbag, you guys would not have to join in and we would not have been kicked out of the boardwalk for the night. If it wasn’t for me and my fucking anger issues, we would be having a fun shopping date…”

You did not get to finish your sentence as David interrupted you. “We’re not mad, you know? And we would certainly not love you less for what you did. So, what, you have anger issues? Have you seen Marko? The babe starting so many fights despite his height…” This time, it was Marko who cut David, by an outraged loud “HEY!”, hitting the platinium blond in the shoulder. “See?” David said with one of his usual smirks. “Marko has a short temper yet we still love him. Don’t worry about that kitten. But we sure would be less worried if you were like us…” “Not yet, David. But one day…”

Feeling better about yourself, you let yourself go in Paul’s embrace, and fully relax as he sloppily kissed you. Your boys knew about your anger issues, and yet they still loved you no matter what. Finally, it wasn’t that bad of an evening.

Read on AO3

[midnightstar-90]

2-in-1

Masterlist | Taglist | Request

Dave Lizewski x Reader | Todd Haynes x Sister!Reader

Summary: You’re Todd’s popular little sister, and you like one of his not-so-popular friends. What happens when a couple of words leaves the two on non-speaking terms?

Warnings: Language! (“Is anyone gonna deal with the fact that Cap just said “language”?”) Get it? A superhero joke for a story based on a superhero.

A/N: It’s the Evan Peters version of Todd. I just love Evan, so that's how I imagined it. If you want to picture Augustus, you can. There are no rules here. Make it your own.

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Todd and Marty were both standing around Dave as he grabbed his books for his next class. When he finished grabbing his Chemistry textbook, he slammed his locker door shut. They start walking to class, but not without a little chit-chat.

“So, you guys down for Atomic Comics this weekend?” Dave asked his two best friends. Ever since the boys met each other, they’ve always loved comics. They would be able to tell you the exact comic from one line if you asked.

“Yeah, I’m down,” Marty said with a shrug of his shoulders. Dave nodded at his response before both of them turned their head to Todd.

“My sister is grounded, so I have to make sure my sister doesn't invite anyone over this weekend. My parents are going out of town. If I went she would have to go,” Todd contemplated his options. You don’t like superheroes as much as Todd, so you’d probably complain. And if they go to Todd’s house, he’d be spending his time making sure you aren’t doing things you’re not supposed to.

“We-“ Dave couldn’t even finish his sentence before a herd of people crowded around the hallway. “What’s going on over there?” Marty asked in confusion. Todd and Dave looked towards the mob. Every day, since Y/N started school, kids would crowd around her like she was a celebrity. She could get things done at the speed of light. She once threw a party at the last minute, and it ended up in a magazine.

They stood, watching as the mob of people started to disperse. They moved a little closer to see Katie and her friend, but also Y/N. Y/N looked to be handing out a flyer. Todd quickly walked over and took the flyer from his sister’s hand.

“Y/N, you’re grounded. You know you can’t do anything when you're grounded,” Todd yelled at his little sister. Y/N rolled her eyes before they landed on Dave. She stared at Dave with admiration in her eyes.

She continued to look at Dave as she spoke, “Mom and Dad said no one in the house, but they said nothing about going out. Here, take a flyer. If you want to hang with the cool kids, you’ll go.”

She tried to walk off before Todd grabbed her arm, snatching all the flyers from her hands. “Call it off, Y/N. What happens when pictures end up online? If mom and dad see them, we’re both going down. So, how about you go to Atomic Comics with me and the boys, and I won’t tell mom about her favorite dress that mysteriously ripped,” Todd said with a smirk.

Y/N looked at her brother furiously. “Fine, but only if you let me sit by Dave,” she whispered to her brother, so her brother’s best friend doesn’t hear. Todd knew about his sister’s crush on Dave. He also knew that Dave has a crush on Katie, so he allowed it.

He nodded his head, making Y/N smile. She started walking to class, but as she passed Dave she gave him a wink. Dave looked at his best friend’s sister with a nervous chuckle and watched as she walked away.

“I guess I’m going to Atomic Comics with you guys,” Todd told his friends as he side hugged his friends around the shoulders. They all understood that his going would also include Y/N, so they nodded their heads and started walking.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Y/N and Todd walked into Atomic Comics. Y/N was not happy. She could be throwing the party of the century, but she was now hanging out with nerds and her crush. They sat down at the table with Todd’s friends. Todd sat with Marty and Y/N, as promised, sat next to Dave. Y/N was welcomed to a Y/F/F/M (your favorite flavor milkshake) milkshake.

“I ordered you guys a milkshake. Uh, I didn’t know what flavor you like, Y/N, so I got you Y/F/F/M,” Dave said nervously. Y/N blushed, turning her head, so the others wouldn’t see her. He knew my favorite milkshake flavor. Eeeep!

Y/N took the gesture as a sign that Dave liked her. She silently put her hand on Dave’s thigh. Dave’s body tensed up at the feeling of the girl's hand on his thigh. No one had ever touched him there before. He looked at the girl to see her on her phone playing candy crush. He slowly moved her hand off of his leg, only for it to once again place itself back on his leg, only higher. This went on for a couple of minutes before Dave had enough.

“Y/N, can I talk to you real quick?” he said through his teeth. He wasn’t upset. No, he was uncomfortable. They got up and walked towards the comic section.

“What was that?” Dave asked the girl he considered his sister.

“What? My hand on your thigh?” He nodded at her question. “I thought you liked me. Wait, do you not like me?” Dave didn’t speak for a couple of seconds. Y/N’s eyes started to tear up, knowing she just embarrassed herself.

Dave didn’t know how to handle the situation. How do you tell your friend’s kid sister that you don’t like her the same way she does? The next thing Dave said really set Y/N off. “Everyone knows I like Katie,” Dave said nervously.

Y/N was furious. “Are you for real? That Bitch?! You know she thinks you’re gay? That’s why you guys have been hanging out together so much. Not because she likes you, but because she thinks your gay! I didn’t tell her that you lied, but now...” Y/N yelled, not finishing her sentence out of anger. She grabbed the attention of her brother and Marty.

Dave must have forgotten who he was talking to because he just kept saying the wrong stuff. “I know. Please don’t tell her. I’m trying to find a way to tell her that I’m not,” Dave begged.

“You’re a loser and a dick. You probably have a loser dick also,” Y/N said. She didn’t mean it, but she was angry. She walked over to the table and grabbed her milkshake. She walked back over to Dave. She looked him in the eye as she poured her milkshake all over his head. Some of it slid off his head and down his face and body. With that, she ran out of the Comic shop in tears.

A cold and sticky Dave walked back over to his friends after watching Y/N run out. “You really hurt her feelings. You know, she told me while we were having a spa day that she rejected all the boys that asked her at school because she would rather be with either you or Kickass. You were the more predictable choice, but I also knew you didn’t like her like that. This is my fault. I should have been the big brother and told her the truth,” Todd looked down.

“Wait, you have spa days with your sister?” Marty laughed.

“That’s all you got from that? You know what? My sister is crying her eyes out on the streets, which makes her vulnerable to bad guys, so I’m gonna catch up with her,” he said, getting up and leaving the comic shop. Dave felt sorry, but there is only one thing he can do.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Later that day, Todd tried to cheer Y/N up with a spa day. It helped a little but she was still heartbroken. He sat next to her on her bed and rubbed her back.

“Hey, you know that not everyone is going to like you back. You're gonna have crushes who reject you, just like today. But I want you to know that Dave does love you, just not the way you want him to,” Todd told his sister before leaving the room.

Y/N cried a little more before a knock was heard at her window. She walked over and moved her curtain to see Kickass at her window. She quickly opened it.

“Kickass? What are you doing here?” Y/N asked, confused.

“Well, your friend Dave messaged me saying that you needed some cheering up. He wanted me to tell you that he’s sorry. He didn’t mean to hurt your feelings,” Dave told Y/N.

“If Dave’s so sorry, why can’t he tell me himself. He totally hurt my feelings, and no offense, Kickass, but this meeting means nothing to me without Dave,” Y/N told the masked superhero.

Dave opened his mouth to say something but quickly closed it. He thought about what he was gonna do next for at least two minutes. He walked towards the girl sitting on her bed.

“I think this will cheer you up,” Dave said, checking to make sure no one could see or hear anything. He reached for his mask, and slowly started to lift it up. Y/N looked up at the superhero, and she saw her brother’s best friend.

Her eyes widened in shock. “Dave, you’re Kick-“ Y/N got out before her mouth was covered. Dave had covered her mouth with his gloved hands to keep her from yelling his secret out to the world.

“I would really like it if your brother and the rest of the world didn’t know about this. But, I really am sorry. You mean a lot to me, and seeing you sad really hurt me. You're like a little sister to me. I’m sorry I can’t be what you want me to be, but I really do love you,” Dave told Y/N confidently.

Y/N nodded her head, still releasing the tears from her eyes. Dave took off his glove and started to wipe her tears away. When Dave finished, he pulled Y/N into a side hug and laid a kiss on top of her head.

They stayed like that for about a minute before Y/N spoke, “Dave, I know you don’t wanna be with me, but would you like to stay and hang out?”

Y/N looked at the boy with hopeful eyes. The ones that make you feel bad if you say no. The ones a lost dog gives you when you find it shaking, cold, and wet from the rain. Dave tried not to look, but it was impossible not to give in. He agreed to Y/N’s proposal. The girl's face lit up like Christmas.

She grabbed her headphones and started to make her way towards her brother’s room. One time, she went to borrow something from Todd but was met with the sight of her brother jerking off to porn.

Y/N opened the door to Todd’s room, to see Todd jamming out to music on his laptop. Y/N snuck in, quietly. She made sure not to bring attention to herself as she grabbed clothes from his drawer. She successfully completed her mission and made her way back to her room.

Meanwhile, in Y/N’s room, Dave walked around looking at Y/N’s things. He looked towards her desk to see a photo. He walked towards it to see a photo from 4 years ago held in a grey frame. It was a photo of Y/N, Todd, and Dave at Y/N’s 10th birthday party. Y/N had cake all over her face.

Dave remembered that day. Y/N and Todd’s dad bought two cakes. He was always one to pull pranks. They put the candles on the decoy cake, and they sang ‘Happy Birthday’. When the time was right, Todd and Dave snuck behind Y/N, picked up the cake, and pushed it into her face. Everyone laughed, even Y/N.

Y/N quietly walked back into the room with her brother’s clothes. She saw Dave looking at her 10th birthday picture. He seemed to be lost in thought, so when she cleared her throat to let him know she was there, he jumped like a cat next to a horn.

He stuttered trying to explain what was going on, but Y/N just threw the clothes at him and left the room. She sat outside the door as he got dressed. She heard a couple of clattering sounds but knew it was Dave being clumsy.

When he opened the door, she almost fell back. She picked herself off the floor and made her way into her room. She picked up her laptop, and relaxed on the bed, watching random movies on Netflix. And that’s how they fell asleep.

Around 4 am Dave woke up to see a snoring Y/N laying on his chest. Careful not to wake her up, he lifted her up and moved from his spot. He made sure he had all of the items he came in with and left, but not without a quick glance at Y/N. He smiled at the girl, and quietly closed her window.

I don't deserve her. She deserves better.

[princessamericachavez]

Play-pretend monsters (this time)

“Welcome!! Welcome to dark realms where only a few brave souls dare enter!” Eddie yells, making his voice echo across the Hellfire Club’s meeting room. 

He puts a bit more theatrics to his voice than usual, because he’s nervous. Acting loud and dramatic is the best way he knows to convey confidence —fake it ‘till you make it, right?— and right now he needs all the courage he can muster to act cool around his three new friends. 

There’s certainly a rush of excitement when he realizes that Nancy, Robin and Steve look far more scared right now, as they look at him behind the DM screen, than they were while exploring that cursed Upside Down land. There, Eddie had felt like a child, stepping into shoes way too big for his terrified little feet, but here? Here he is in his turf, and for once these brave monster-killing trio are the ones out of their depth. 

“Please, do sit down,” he gestures with a hand to the table, while mentally going through his pre-game notes again. 

They did the character building separately, sitting together at cafes or at the mall. He wasn’t sure which part had been more surprising: that they were okay being seen with Eddie ‘The Freak’ Munson, that they each seemed to know exactly what they wanted to play as, or that two out of three of the meetings felt akin to a date. 

“I’ve seen you shoot, you’re definitely a ranger,” he’d told Nancy Wheeler, as they sipped on too-sugary milkshakes at the recently re-built mall. “Though you could get the same effect with a spellcaster. A bookish wizard, maybe?”

But Nancy Wheeler, of course, had already done her research... judging by the heavy binder she slammed on the table between them. 

“Actually, I asked Mike over the phone and he was telling me about the different classes he’s played before. We were talking about party build and how to best max my statistics, you know? Give us a better chance. Now, he says survival has been an issue when they play smaller parties, and I can see why. We need someone to soak damage in while also delivering it... I think I wanna, uh,” she’d checked her notes, “I wanna ‘tank’. I want to play a barbarian.”

Eddie’s eyebrows had shot up. He was about to ask something, but then Nancy’s expression had changed, from all-business to an unexpectedly giddy smile. 

“I wanna hit stuff. Very hard.”

“You- you want to hit stuff,” he echoed. 

“Yes!” She grinned. “I’m always shooting and staying back, and it’s so fucking frustrating... I want to get up close and hit the monster, just once.”

To anyone listening, it would be hard to understand that Wheeler wasn’t speaking of past games or fantasy... she spoke from real experiences. And she was so eager, that Eddie felt himself grinning back at her. “Then let’s get you raging.”

Nancy hadn’t been the only one pulling from real experience to create their new character. 

Dustin and Eddie had long theorized about what class would fit Steve ‘the King’ Harrington best and had both landed on Paladin. They’d both seen the guy dive head first into fights time and time again to protect the party (a recurring thing, according to Dustin). He had a mean swing that only seemed to be missing a smite to be the stuff of legends. And the dude was a Lawful Good if Eddie’d ever seen one. So he was shocked when, after exposing all the choices before him, Steve had ceremoniously put a finger over the Cleric class.

“Cleric? You sure?”

“That’s the healer, right?” 

Eddie had nodded, confused. 

“Dude, don’t look at me like that! You know how fucked up you get when you’re fighting monsters or other people? That shit hurts. Believe me, as someone who has gotten the hell beaten out of him way too many times, and- and who’s definitely seen way too many people almost die around him... we’re gonna need a fucking healer.”

Hard to argue against that. 

And then, there’d been Robin, who after much deliberation —loudly babbling about all the pros and cons of each class and race— had latched on to the Warlock with loud glee. 

“I get to make a deal with something creepy!” 

“Yeah!” Eddie’d laughed. “I mean, it can get dark and complicated, but that’s a sweet class.”

“Dude, it’s so perfect! I mean, have you seen all that crazy shit? Imagine if you could like- like harness it. Like Eleven! If I could do something powerful and crazy and amazing like that, I feel like I would be fucking unstoppable, you know? I mean, sure, I’ll sell my soul. It’s not like I’m going to heaven anyway-”

“What?” He’d tilted his head, before he even realized the word’d left his mouth. He wasn’t used to anyone other than him talking like that. 

“Well- it’s just- you know, whatever religious bullshit,” Robin’d waved a hand, dismissively, though he’d recognized enough tension on her shoulders to let the subject drop. Whatever this was, it’s scared her nearly as much as Vecna, and he decided it was none of his business to push for it. 

“So, you want to be a Warlock,” he said instead, giving her his best manic grin. 

“Yes!” She’d jumped, a little too loudly for the comfort of the rest of the people at their coffeeshop. “Gimme those sweet sweet powers!”

And so, here they stand: probably the most unlikely group of people he’d ever Dungeon Mastered for. 

He considers them quietly, as Nancy pulls out a huge bag of dice from her backpack (and he is, again, shocked by the weight she can so easily carry around in that thing). 

“What? Where’d you get so many?” Robin gaps. 

“Mike’s room,” Nancy smirks, in a way that makes it clear that she did not have her brothers permission to grab his stuff. Turns out this one is the rebellious Wheeler after all. 

“Are you kidding me?” Steve pouts. “Why do you get to have so many? Henderson would barely let me borrow one set!” He produces a small fake-leather pouch, looking like a guy who definitely thinks size matters. 

“I- I- I didn’t know we had to bring our own,” Robin shoots the other two a panicked look before her eyes meet Eddie’s, like a child about to get kicked out of the classroom for not doing the homework. 

“It’s okay, you can have some of mine,” Nancy is prompt to intervene, ‘rescuing’ her friend with a handful of colorful die. 

The light might be weird in here because Eddie could almost swear that Robin’s face looks as red as Nancy’s lipstick. 

“How come she gets more than me?!” Steve whines, despondent. 

He gets a flat look in return, but then Nancy smiles while dropping a bunch of dice in front of him, like a tiny skinny Santa Claus giving away presents in the middle of July. This time, Eddie is entirely sure the he did not imagine the boy’s burning-red blush. 

Looking at the three of them, nervous and excited, like they haven’t all killed real monsters together and survived the most unimaginable horrors, acting just like a group of baby-geeks, Eddie feels a strong rush of affection wash over him, so strong it nearly makes his ears ring. Luckily, the low lights in here might hide it and save what’s left of his reputation. He takes a quick, private, deep breath to shake the nerves away before stepping in, chin raised and teeth bared with a feral smile: 

“Shall we begin?”

[fakescenarios-tohelpyousleep]

crazy golf| evan ‘buck’ buckley

summary| when you blackout on a mini golf course the 118 gets called to the scene

“Your dad?! You have a dad?” You couldn’t help but chuckle at the shock that spills from the speakers of your phone. While you had the day off from the firehouse, your boyfriend Buck, wasn’t so lucky. In fact today was when he worked one of the dreaded 24 hour shifts. “Everyone has a dad, Buck.” You laugh at him sarcastically and you can hear your boyfriend scoff over the other end of the call. “I know that, it’s just that... I don’t know, you never really talked about your dad before.” Now you scoff. “Yeah there isn’t much to tell, he left when I was still really young and our communication was little to none throughout the years.” “So explain to me why you’re meeting with him exactly.” You could hear the voice of Chimney make it’s way into the conversation and you could bet that he and Hen had now gathered around Buck to hear the conversation.. if you’re lucky Bobby and Eddie probably joined as well. 

“I don’t know, he and his new family is in town for vacation so I figured why not meet up with them.” As you make your way through your and buck’s shared house to the living room, where you sit yourself on the couch. “If you guys don’t talk, how does he even know you live in LA?” Hen now spoke, proving you correct. “My mom’s Facebook most likely-” Eddie scoffs at the comment. “Oh cause you and your mom talk so much more Ms. I didn’t tell my mom I moved across country.” “You didn’t tell your own mother you moved across the country?” Now Bobby’s voice comes over the speaker... the gangs all here. “Okay shut up both of you!” “Is it really a good idea, Y/N? I mean, you haven’t seen him in years. Are you sure you want to go alone?” Buck’s voice is finally heard again. You could picture the exact face he was making in that moment. The concerned Buck face. “It’s not like he’s a psychopath, Buckley.” “Y/N’s a big girl, she can handle it.” Bobby joked in the background of the call. “Is it just you and him or are there more people that will be there?” “Most likely him and I, his wife, and her 2 kids.” At that the loud ring of the fire bell ignites. “Y/N, we have to go. I’ll talk to you later, be careful, I love you.” “I love you too and shut up about me being careful, take your own advice.” 

_

“Pants, are you crazy girl? It’s 90 degrees out!” The hounded of your father begins the second you approach the group of them at the entree of the mini golf course. “90 degrees is nothing if she goes into burning buildings with practically a winter jacket on.” The countering voice of the eldest step brother replied to his comment before I could. The eldest, named James, was my favorite of the three kids. Not that I saw much of them, but from what I did, he was always the nicest. Kayla, younger than James but older than myself, was always more bitchy, however we knew each other back when she was a teenager. “You’d be surprised for being a firefighter, putting out fires is only like 2 percent of what I do on a day to day.” 

“Hey-” “Stop worrying she’ll be okay.” Buck practically jumped from his skin when Eddie snatched his phone from his hands. Buck frantically looks around to the other as they unpack the truck from the recent call. Chimney and Hen laugh at him for the way he’s acting. “I’m just checking to be safe!” Buck defends snatching his phone back, checking the screen for any miss calls before sighing and sliding his phone back into his pocket. “You’re worrying about an ex-detective turned firefighter meeting up with her dad... how does Y/N deal with you.” Chimney questioned earning another eye roll from Buck. “You just never know. I know what it’s like to not have a good relationship with your parents. I’d be dying right now if I were in her position.” Buck explains and Hen shows a bit of empathy for the boy. “Y/N isn’t you Buck, she’s not any of us, she’s her. If you hadn’t noticed she doesn’t really hold grudges, she gonna go see him, pretend like nothing happened and then when he disappears again she’ll forget that he even came back into her life.”

“Vending Machine, you want anything?” James questioned as you reach the midway point of the course. “My god, yes please.” You huff, wiping the sweat from your forehead. You join James and Kayla near the machine, taking a seat besides Kayla on her bench. “Water please.” “There is only soda.” James calls back and both girls groan, rolling there eyes. “It’s too hot of soda.” Kayla groaned, you nod in agreement. “Sprite, I guess.” “Coke for me.” You lean your head back to hang in exhaustion. “So.. how has LA been? Any boyfriend?” Kayla starts up conversation, different from how she use to be. “Better than back home and yeah, yeah a boyfriend.” “Boyfriend? What’s his name?” James over hears, turning and handing us our respected can of soda. You open it and down half of it, placing the cold can on your neck before replying, “Buck, well Evan Buckley but we call him Buck. We work together.” They nod, as dad and his wife join us ready to continue the game. You go to stand and suddenly stumble back at the blackness that suddenly clouds your vision. “Whoa, Y/N you okay?” Your dad reaches out to stop you from falling. “Yeah, yeah, just stood up to fast. I’m fine.” You remember, you haven’t eaten since you’ve left work the night prior and water.. well water isn’t exactly your drink of choice. “Are you sure?” James double checks. “Yes I’m fine.”You shrug your dad’s arm from your shoulder and start the small uphill hike to the next hole, however before you can get your bearings you’re suddenly on the ground slumped again the rocks of the golf course, the world around you coming in and out. 

The blaring of the alarm puts everyone in the 118 into motion as the team climbs into the firetruck and ambulance and as the truck pulls into drive, Buck’s phone goes off in his pocket. His sister Maddie. “Maddie what is it? We’re on a call-” “Yeah yeah I know, it’s about the call... it’s Y/N.” 

“LAFD please clear the way.” Bobby, followed by the team arrives onto the scene where James is waiting at the beginning of the course to lead them to the still incoherent Y/N. “What exactly happened?” Bobby questioned, Buck and Eddie standing to each side of him as Chimney and Hen make there way onto the course to evaluate her. “We stopped to get a drink from the vending machine and then when we went to continue she went to walk up the hill and just boom, dropped.” “Her vitals are all good, she’s coming in and out, she’s extremely dehydrated!” Hen calls from their position, Hen and Chimney kneels on the ground besides you. “Y/N!” Buck yells going to take off to join them, however, stopped by both Eddie and Bobby. “Buck stop! Go get water from the stand, Eddie from the ambulance get a gerny, I’ll go get Y/N, Eddie set up under the sprinklers here.” “Bobby, let me go get her-” “Buck follow the order.” With a red face, Buck stomps away from his captain in the direction of the convent stand to get water. Bobby treks his way through the course joining half of his team as well as her father and step mother. Hen has already inserted an IV with water into Y/N arm and slowly was she regaining her consensuses. “Y/N, it’s Bobby we’re going to move you, okay?” “Bobby?” You mumbled as he counted to three, lifting you effortlessly, Hen holding the IV bag as Chimney follows with the medical bag in hand. Bobby knows you’re with them as he can feel you holding onto his neck as he carries you but as your head drops forward, he begins talking. “Y/N talk to me.” “I’m okay.” Your voice trails off, head dropping completely backwards as your arms go slightly limb as they arrive to the beginning of the course again, where Eddie had a gerny, Buck had water and sprinklers were raining water lightly down. “Y/N come on, wake up!” Bobby’s voice gets louder as he sits you down completely out cold. “Y/N!” Buck’s voice calls louder as he shoved the bottle of water into Eddie’s hands. “Y/N!” Buck shakes you, both hands on either side of your face and with the shakening and the sprinkling of water as well as the IV coursing water into your body, you’re eyes flutter open. “Buck, I’m fine.” Buck smiles, sighing in relief, his head dropping forward grateful for you’re eyes opening. “Y/N when was the last time you ate?” Hen’s judgmental voice speaks up as her arms cross. “Um-” You shut your eyes tightly, the exhaustion not leaving your body. “Cap, what did you make for dinner late night?” Scoffs from your team fill the air. “You are an idiot.” Buck mumbles besides you and you lightly push him off. “Eddie, go get get a milkshake or something please.” Bobby orders and Eddie nods rushing off to get it. “Chocolate! She doesn’t like Vanilla!” Buck calls after his teammate, his eyes falling to her family, standing just off to the side watching in silence as she mingles with the team that just saved her. “So... I’m assuming that’s Buck?”

[sarcasmandships]

honey and glass ~ spencer reid

i am in love with spencer reid but he only has eyes for jennifer jareau

spencer reid x reader angst + hurt/comfort (sorta, it’s all in first person but with no names/no specific descrptions)

song fic inspired by ‘honey and glass’ by peyton cardoza

word count: 4.8k

disclaimer: i do not ship jeid or think they had any chemistry but it’s a good opportunity for angst x

you know those kinds of girls who look like they're made of honey and glass like sticky sweet ash

it’s a summers night in california and i’m on the beach at sunset.

the sand is rough under my toes and a warm, gentle breeze blows a strand of my hair across my face; he lifts his hand to brush it away. tucking it behind my ear he stares down at me and the sun hits his face at a perfect angle, illuminating his hazel eyes like pools of honey. he leans in and i-

“ow!” i yelp, as morgan launches the volleyball at my head, “what was that for?”  

“come and play,” he laughs, waving me over to where he stands with emily and hotch.

i shake my head, “no, i don’t feel like it,” i mumble, massaging my left temple where the ball bounced off my skull.

morgan rolls his eyes and jogs past where i’m sitting to collect the ball, “what’s up with you then?” he teases.

i shrug, “nothing. I’m just tired,” i say feigning an unconvincing yawn, “ask one of them to play.”  

i motion with my head towards spencer and jj, they’re down by the edge of the waves and she throws her head back and laughs at something he says. her sheets of blonde hair ripple through the wind and he looks at her in pure awe and amazement as she giggles at something he said.

“nah, don’t wanna interrupt the kid when he’s trying to make a move,” morgan shrugs, “come play with us, we need an extra person.”

an extra person.

right.

because what else am i but another body to fill the space?

“i don’t want to,” i say, forcing myself to tear my eyes away from jj and spencer as i stand up, “hotch said the jet is leaving first thing tomorrow, i’m gonna head back to the hotel and get some sleep.”

morgan says something, but i don’t register it as i allow myself one last glance at spencer and jj. she is trying to convince him to paddle in the waves with her, he shakes his head but when she takes his hand in hers i can tell he’s melting inside as he follows her into the water.

and i just know that he’d follow her so far out to sea that his head was underwater as long as she kept their hands intertwined.

i turn away from morgan so he doesn’t see the tears burning in my eyes.

and you can't get the taste off your tongue burnt sugar and a little bit of rum

we’re in a dimly lit bar somewhere.

hotch left hours ago, he wanted to take advantage of one of the rare nights he would be there to read jack a bedtime story.

rossi is at a table in the corner, sitting with a woman who has not-so-subtly draped her leg over him.

derek is out of my line of sight and i’m thankful for that.

emily, garcia, and jj are dancing.

i sit at the table with spencer, he’s drunk.

more tipsy than drunk i think, but he so rarely drinks anything that the sight of him swaying along to the music was an anomaly. i can’t ignore the fact that his eyes are firmly fixed on jj as she dances, and i grip my wine glass so tightly i half expect it to shatter in my hand.

he leans across to me and my heart skips a beat as i inhale the alcohol on his breath, “i’m in love with her, y’know,” he slurs.

“i know, spencer,” i smile sadly and down the rest of my wine.

he doesn’t even notice when i grab my coat from behind him and shuffle towards the door.

and she dances in the rain with her clothes on drenched to the bone never knows when she's all gone, she's the life of the party

spencer and i are watching the big bang theory.

neither of us particularly like it, but there aren’t many channels on our hotel room tv and spencer enjoys the physics references at least. i watch his face light up as a character mentions something about quantum theory that i cant understand, and spencer launches into a rant about the universe and the stars.

i don’t have the knowledge to keep up with him or the heart to tell him to stop so i sit and listen, admiring the way his eyes sparkle and his hands gesticulate when no one interrupts him with a deprecating comment.

we sit there like that for the rest of the night, in our respective twin beds with him telling me the secrets of the universe and me wondering how on earth i will ever get over him.

and deep down I know that nobody flinches when she takes off her clothes

“anything you like?” emily asks me through the dressing room curtain.

“i’m not sure…” i mumble in response, biting down on my lip as i stare at myself in the mirror, “i-i don’t think this is my colour.”

the dress looked so beautiful on the hanger, but now that it’s on my body the fabric bunches up in all the wrong places and i can’t recall a time that i’ve looked worse.

the lights are just washing you out, i tell myself.

you’re having a bad hair day, it would look better with your hair down, i tell myself.

you just need some lipstick, i tell myself.

but when jj announces she has found the perfect dress and i stick my head out of the curtain to see her, i am slapped in the face with the realisation that it isn’t the lighting or my lack of makeup it’s just me.

because jj looks beautiful as always, her dress hugs her waist and the skirt fans out around her as emily demands she gives us a spin. she isn’t wearing makeup, her hair is in a ponytail too, the lights don’t wash her out because she is radiant and flawless, and the lights aren’t the problem.

i am.

i cry in my car as i drive home from the mall, and when i get home i tear everything out of my fridge and fling it into the trashcan. i vow to go to the store and stock up on salad and chicken.

i go to the store but i don’t buy salad.

and I wonder what it's like to be one of those girls to sit in the sun and look at the world and never think, "wow, am i enough?" ‘cause life is easy when you know that you're the main character

i’m in hotch’s office as he grills me about a stupid mistake i made in the field. i can hardly focus on his words as i shrink back in the chair, counting all the reasons that i don’t deserve to be in this job.

i’m not as smart or fast or strong as the others. i don’t have an eidetic memory or hacker skills and i can’t even maintain myself as a solid average agent because i keep fucking up.

“i’m not going to write you up,” he says, and my heart soars a little in my chest, “but i need you to understand that if you do something like that again i won’t have any choice, you were lucky no one got hurt today.”

i nod silently and blink back the tears that threaten to spill over.

“go home, get some rest,” he says and i don’t hang around for a second longer, darting out of his office i crash headfirst into a tall frame.

“wow, slow down,” he chuckles, resting a hand on my shoulder to steady me.

“spencer,” i gasp, looking up at his sympathetic smile, “what are you still doing here? we landed hours ago….”

he shrugs, “i waited for you.”

my heart skips a beat.

“you didn’t have to do that.”

he shakes his head, “you’re my best friend, i wanted to. plus i thought you might need someone after being in there with hotch.”

i swallow and offer him a slightly forced smile.

best friend.

“thanks, spence, that means a lot.”

he looks at me quizzically.

“what’s wrong?”

“nothing, just only jj calls me spence…anyways” he holds out his arm for me, “shall we go?”

i have to restrain myself from seizing his arm, and settle for tentatively wrapping my own around it, “thanks spencer…you’re such a good friend.”

he smiles down at me and its almost enough to melt away the icy feeling in my heart as i call him a friend. the coldness in my chest in my chest is a feeling i’ve grown accustomed to but when i’m with him everything is warm and bright again.

he feels like yellow.

and i feel like maybe i am enough.

and I'm sitting here thinking this is not fair

i feel like blue.

i’m alone in my apartment flicking through tv channels, trying to find something that isn’t a medical or crime drama. because after my day at work i can’t look at any more blood or dead bodies, even if its as fake as the pep in my voice when jj calls to ask if i’m okay.

“hotch grilled you pretty bad, huh? you sure you’re okay?”

“yeah, spence – spencer – waited for me and we went to get milkshakes after.”

“aww that’s so nice, you know i think he has a soft spot for you,” she teases.

something acidic bubbles in my throat, but i can’t tell her that i know she’s wrong because he spent half the night telling me how much he loves her. i have to gather the strength to respond without the venom in my heart poisoning my voice.

“oh, i don’t think so,” i laugh, “anyways, i should go – my movie is about to start.”

jj tells me to have a good night before she hangs up, and i switch off the tv. at this time there’s noting but romcoms and i don’t want to sit through hours of pining when its on replay every day at the office.

i watch my own reflection in the blank tv screen as sobs wrack my body.

but her smile makes it hard to be mad it's not her fault that I'm so fucking sad

jj holds me in her arms as i cry into her chest, “it’s okay, you’re gonna be okay,” she coos, rubbing soft circles on my back.

i sniffle against her and i just know that my eyes are puffy and red but i can’t switch off the floods of tears that fall from them.

“do you want to tell me what’s wrong?” she asks.

i shake my head against her because how could i tell her?

how could I tell her that the man i love is in love with her?

and that i want to resent her for it but i can’t because she’s such a good fucking friend that she’s sitting here with me, unknowingly wiping the tears that i can’t stop shedding because i can’t be her.

she gives me one of those heart warming smiles that could bring peace to a dying man, and in that moment i am reminded again of why he loves her. there are worse people to love, i suppose. if spencer is going to cut out his heart and give it to someone it might as well be someone like her.

but that doesn’t make it hurt any less.

and i hate myself for the part of me that hates her. she’s done nothing wrong. it’s not her fault that that spencer loves her, and its not her fault that she doesn’t realise.

so I'll sit here and look at these girls in the sun dancing in the rain and just having their fun

i hate alaska.

my teeth chatter as we trudge through the snow filled field, and i pull the cuffs of my coat over my glove cladded hands. i hate the cold. i hate alaska. i hate the serial killer who dragged us all out here. i hate the impending snowstorm that was keeping the jet grounded for another night.

“should we even be out here?” i groan, “i mean if it’s not safe for the plane, then surely its not safe for us.”

“we aren’t 50,000 feet up in the sky though,” morgan says and i roll my eyes at him.

“it’s cold enough to make me feel like we are,” i huff.

spencer nods sympathetically at me, “i don’t like the cold either, not much snow in vegas.”

“i think we should have two behavioural analysis units,” i begin, “one to catch serial killers in cold climates, and the other in hot ones.”

he laughs, “i’d like that, but i think it’d just be us and garcia on the hot team.”

“we’d get by.”

he’s grinning at me, his messy brown curls are squashed down under his bobble hat but a few of them still manage to peak out. he’s wearing a multicoloured striped scarf and mismatched gloves.

a snowflake lands on his eyelash and i reach out to brush it off.

“thanks.”

“anytime.”

morgan launches a snowball at us, and it hits me in the back of the head, “hey! what is it with you and throwing things?” i snap.

morgan roars with laughter.

“not funny derek!”

he resumes his snowball fight with emily and jj and i draw my arms across my chest. i watch as they prance about in the snow, falling to avoid the snowballs launched by the others and laughing when they get hit. the sun is just starting to set, and it’s rays catch jj’s hair at the perfect angle, bouncing off the golden blonde strands as she dances around morgan. her and emily have joined forces to pelt him with snowballs.

i look up at spencer to see him starting at her in awe. his nose and cheeks are flushed from the cold, and the sun reflects against his own face, illuminating his eyes. they’re beautiful. like honey and glass.

“guys! come join us!” jj calls.

i shake my head, “there’s not enough money in the world.”

she pouts at me, “spence, please,” she says sweetly and before i know it he’s by her side and scooping up snow.

i watch from the side-lines.

spencer roars with laughter when emily hits morgan square in the face with a snowball, he wraps an arm around jj as she nearly collapses from laughter, something twinges in my stomach.

but he looks so happy, and that melts my glacier heart slightly.

maybe alaska wasn’t so bad after all.

and maybe one day, i can forget the past and be one of those girls of honey and glass

“nice to meet you, agent,” agent fitz says, holding out his hand, “we’ve heard good things about you up in the new york office.”

“really?” i say, shaking his hand and i can’t fight the smile that creeps across my face.

“really. give me a call if you ever fancy a change of scenery.”

“i’ll keep that in mind, agent fitz,” i give him a nod and a smile as he walks away.

new york was cold in the winter, but it didn’t seem like the worst place in the world.

but I think that it's hard for people to see that I love all these girls, and honestly it doesn't matter what you look like or how much you weigh

i wondered once how i’d ever get over my love for spencer reid, and now as he sits and sobs on my couch i realise that i don’t want to. it hurts me to love him, and something stabs my heart every time i catch him staring at her, but he deserves someone to love him like he loves her.

“i guess i’m just starting to realise that she’ll never love me back, and i don’t know why or what’s wrong with me,” he says and looks up at me, his eyes filled with tears and his face blotchy and red.

“there’s nothing wrong with you,” i say, wrapping an arm around him and wiping his tears, “sometimes the people you love just don’t love you back, but that’s not a reflection of you or your self-worth,” i reiterate to him the mantra i say in my mirror every morning.

he whimpers and my heart breaks for him.

“it doesn’t feel that way, it feels like i’m dying inside every time she talks about him or tells me about their dates, and i try to be a good friend but-”

his voice cracks and another sob escapes his chest and i tighten my grip around him; heartbreak doesn’t seem to get easier with age, because here we are, two fbi agents in our late twenties crying over our crushes like we are in junior high.

because before i know it the tears are flowing down my face faster than his and when he breaks away from our embrace to ask me why i’m crying, i can’t tell him it’s because i am feeling everything he is.

“i just don’t like seeing you like this,” is all i can muster up.

it's just that these girls know they're okay there's a beauty in knowing your place in the world in loving yourself and knowing your worth

“hey!” spencer greets me as he steps into the elevator with me.

“hi,” i mumble back, taking another sip of coffee from my travel cup.

we’ve been called in on a case, but i’ve barely had any sleep and i’m struggling to keep my eyes open.

“you look tired, are you okay?”

you look tired.

so the bags under my eyes were obvious then.

“yeah,” i say, swallowing the lump in my throat, “just a late night, y’know.”

“oh…oh! is that your way of saying your date went well?” he says with a coy grin.

“what?”

oh! something clicks in my brain and i understand what he means.

“no! not like that no…actually it didn’t go well at all, he turned out to be a total misogynistic creep,” i say with a bitter laugh.

“oh, i’m sorry….”

i shrug and take another swig of coffee, “it’s okay, you didn’t know. to be honest i’ll probably end up calling him again anyways.”

spencer stares at me, confused, “why would you do that?”

“well, i don’t exactly have guys falling over themselves for me, do i?”

spencer frowns and i can see his brain working overtime behind his eyes, “so you’re just going to settle for less than you deserve?”

“i don’t have many other options do i?”

he reaches out an arm to place a comforting hand on my shoulder, “don’t worry, you’ll find the right guy for you soon. it’s only a matter of time, you’re worth more than a misogynistic creep,” he squeezes my shoulder and before i know it we’ve already reached our floor and he’s gone.

you’ll meet the right guy for you soon.

what if i already have?

you don't have to be perfect or never get sad that's not what it means to be honey and glass

it’s late and i sit at my desk, sorting through piles of paperwork.

my eyes blur as i enter the gruesome details of our latest case, from fatigue or tears i can’t tell. i think emily and hotch are still hanging around the office somewhere, but the others had gone to dinner as soon as we landed, promising that they would do their paperwork tomorrow.

i knew i would have no appetite sitting across a table from spencer and jj so i had sat silently in the back of the suv as hotch drove us back to the office.

a singular tear rolls down my cheek and splatters on my page, smudging the not-quite-dry-yet ink. i let out a shaky breath and wipe my eyes, i don’t know why i’m crying really.

no one had necessarily done anything wrong. only when we were in the field and the unsub had detonated the bomb, spencer chose to push jj out of the way instead of me. i was lucky that one of the s.w.a.t agents had grabbed my arm in time and pulled me back to safety.

it had been hours and my ears were still ringing from the explosion.

maybe spencer thought he was closer to jj, that he had a better chance of saving her, we are trained to make difficult choices based on survival odds, i told myself.

only spencer hadn’t been closer to jj, and she was surrounded by three s.w.a.t agents whilst i only had one next to me. but no one had really done anything wrong, no one died, no one even broke a bone. and it pains me to admit to myself but had i been in spencer’s position and had to chose between saving him or morgan, i know that would pull spencer out of the way every single time.

i jump as emily creeps up behind me, “hey, you okay?”

i don’t even try and disguise my puffy, red eyes or tear tracks as i look up at her, “no. but i think that’s okay.”

and everyone has their highs and their lows the nights you spend crying, believe me, I know

it’s roslyn’s birthday.

i don’t think anyone else in the team knows because they keep exchanging looks whenever jj snaps at one of them and i can see the annoyance in their eyes.

when jj barks at spencer and snaps her pencil within the space of five minutes i drag her into a storage closet and wrap my arms around her.

“shhh,” i say soothingly, “it’s okay, you’re gonna be okay.”

jj shakes her head, “i don’t think so, i thought this day would get easier with time but it’s just getting worse,” she sniffles.

i stroke her hair, “i know, i know its horrible and you deserve to cry as much as you want to. but you are so strong, and i know you can get through this-”

“i’m not,” jj shakes her head, “i’m not strong or brave or anything that you all think i am, i’m not like you I-”

“like me?” i question.

“you always hold yourself together, whenever there’s a case with a kid i’m falling to pieces but you keep it together. i mean i’m the one crying in a storage closet….”

i stare at her in disbelief, because jj is the strongest woman i know and i don’t understand how she can’t see that.

“i don’t have a sister who killed herself jj,” i say slowly, “you have survived 100% of the bad things that have happened to you because you’re a fighter, that makes you strong.”

she shakes her head and clings to me, “but i’ve lost pieces of myself, i’m not the same person i could’ve been if life had been kinder to me and that makes me sad. my sister is dead and that makes me sad, everyone thinks i’m this strong and perfect person and that makes me feel guilty because i can’t be that person.”

in a turn of events, she is crying into my chest, her hair is greasy, and her mascara runs and i realise that my best friend was never truly on the pedestal i placed her on. and i realise i am part of the problem, treating jj like she is the be all and all of perfection and unattainablity when i should just be treating her like a friend.

spencer loves her and that kills me but it’s not what’s important right now. i’ve spent too long inside my own head, struggling to view her as my best friend or the other woman but now i see that she is someone that needs my help.

i know what it’s like to cry myself to sleep so i don’t want jj to go through something like that alone. so i vow there and then, to push my own feelings aside and be whatever she needs me to be.

i don't want to be these girls for beauty or fame but for the confidence they have in their own damn name

“smile!” garcia says as she appears with a camera.

emily, jj, and morgan turn to face her and pose but i duck out of the frame. garcia pouts and morgan grabs onto my forearm to pull me back into shot. i wish that i had the self-confidence to let him, to fall in next to him and make a silly pose at the camera and not worry if my hair was sitting nicely or if i was breathing in enough.

“come on! i need pictures for my scrapbook and you’ve been dodging me all night!” she whines.

i stare down at my feet, “garcia i’m not photoshoot ready like these guys,” i say, trying to make my voice light and floaty but it just sounds like im choking back tears.

“come on, just one picture,” jj says kindly, waving for me to come and stand next to her.

i shake my head again and wring my hands. the last thing i need is another photograph of jj and i to compare myself to every time i’m feeling extra low and self-destructive.

i try and remember the vow i made, to be there for my friend despite my own feelings. but she isn’t sad anymore, she’s happy and smiling and drinking wine, me squeezing in between her and emily for a stupid photograph isn’t going to make or break her.

it’s just a stupid photograph.

“no thanks,” i choke, “i’m going to get another drink,” i scurry away to the kitchen before anyone can object.

i shut the door quickly behind me and press my back up against it, taking a deep breath. i can’t quite believe i was successful in escaping garcia again.

“are you avoid garcia and her camera too?”

“spencer!” i laugh shrilly, “i didn’t even see you there.”

“yeah, i’ve been hiding in here for a half hour,” he smiles sadly, “i hate having my picture taken, especially next to morgan. he makes me look even lankier if possible.”

i frown, spencer had no reason to feel insecure.

“why don’t we get garcia to take a picture of just us two?” i suggest nervously, “you won’t have any reason to feel insecure next to me….”

he looks at me quizzically, “what do you mean?”

i wring my hands again, “just that you’ll automatically look even better if i’m next to you…cos’ i’m…well y’know,” i say awkwardly motioning to my face and body.

he cocks his head to the side, “are you trying to tell me you think you’re ugly, so i’ll look better by comparison?”

i shrug.

“well, i think you look beautiful.”

so I'll sit here and look at these girls in the sun dancing in the rain and just having their fun

we’re on the plane journey home.

spencer and jj sit next to each other, their arms pressed together as they share the arm rest. spencer is reading a book; his eyes scan down the pages at lightening speed and i know he’ll be finished soon.

i am on the opposite side of the plane, i sit by myself, i like the space.

i keep my eye on them throughout the flight; just as i predicted, it doesn’t take long for spencer to finish his book and he places it down on the table in front of him. jj picks it up and teases him for the long-winded title, i don’t catch what she says, something about astrophysics.

he starts to ramble, and she interrupts him with another teasing remark, he flushes when she gently nudges his chest. i turn my head to stare out of the window, biting my lip.

they aren’t even doing anything, jj is just being friendly. and i still can’t handle it. i lie my head back against the headrest as i gaze out of the window, admiring the new york skyline as it fades into the distance.

a nervous chuckle from spencer snaps me out of my trance, and i look back over to see him and jj giggling secretively as she whispers something into his ear.

 “where are you going?” emily grumbles, she’s half asleep with her legs splayed out across two chairs when i accidently bump her foot.

 “bathroom,” i say quietly with a forced smile as i shuffle past jj and spencer, my heart seizing in my chest as she teases him about how long his hair is getting, brushing her hand through the curls.

i’m already silently sobbing in the bathroom so i miss the pitiful look that emily and morgan exchange.

and I know it doesn't make sense to forget the past but I promise, one day, you'll be honey and glass

“agent fitz?” i say, clutching my phone tight in my hand.

“ahh, i’ve been wondering when i’d be hearing from you.”

i laugh quietly, “yes, well i’ve been thinking about what you said, and i think i could do with that change of scenery now.”

i wrote this in a couple hours and didnt proof read so apologies for an errors :))

part 2

[yourlocalfictionalenthusiast]

IN LIFE, IN DEATH...

PART THREE

Part One, Part Two

Warnings: just some swearing

May 1995

“We’re totally gonna get a record deal!”

Luke said for the tenth time in the past hour as he bounced in his seat.

It was Friday night and normally, you would all be messing around at the park, the beach, or just watching a movie in the studio. But when your phone rang and it was the booking manager for the Orpheum telling you that Sunset Curve is officially the new opener next month, the boys insisted on being there the second your shift at the diner was over.

So instead of arguing about having another Star Wars marathon or playing at the pier, you were all packed in your regular booth at Cece’s for celebratory milkshakes. You sat on the very edge of the booth, practically falling asleep on Alex. Ever since you got the call that morning, every cell in your body felt supercharged with excitement.

But now that the day was coming to an end, you could hardly stay awake enough to pay attention to the conversation.

Bobby, who was in your usual spot, pinched Luke’s arm. “Don’t jinx it, dude.”

“It’s not jinxing if you know for sure.” Luke said. “I mean, we’re awesome! And we’ve worked so hard to get to this point. It’s all gonna pay off.”

As much as you wanted to believe him, you were still nervous. There was nothing you were prouder of than your music, and you knew that a crowd that big would be good for gaining a lot of new fans. But the idea of that many people seeing you perform and hearing your lyrics was nerve-wracking.

You could tell the others felt the same way. Bobby was biting his nails, Alex was bouncing his leg so hard it almost hit the table and Reggie was slumped against the wall. Luke just stared at all of you, his bright smile never fading.

He snapped his fingers so loud that you jumped at the noise, then he started digging in his pockets. “I know what’ll cheer you guys up.”

Luke pulled out a safety pin, then brought its point down into the table, his tongue poking out of the side of his mouth in concentration. After a few minutes, he brushed off the table and presented his design proudly. It was four words in huge slanted letters.

‘SUNSET CURVE WAS HERE’

“Seriously, Luke?” Alex said, his eyes wide. “Cece’s gonna kill you!”

Luke just smirked and handed him the pin, gesturing to the space under the words. “‘C’mon, man. You’re up first.”

It took a lot of convincing, but Alex eventually gave in, and one by one, you all signed your names.

‘Alex,

Bobby

Reggie

Luke

(Y/N)’

You heard the sound of Cece’s heels hitting the floor as she exited the kitchen. Panicking, you shoved the pin in your pocket just in time as she came up to the table. 

Before she could even see that anything was different, Reggie pointed at Luke.

“He did it!”

Cece frowned before inspecting the table, letting out a deep sigh and putting her hands on her hips.

“Are you vandalizing my diner, Patterson?”

Luke paled. “It was a group effort.”

“But it was your idea,” Alex said with a smirk, no doubt trying to pin the blame on Luke to keep his spot as Cece’s favorite. You had to bury your head into his shoulder to contain your laughter.

You could tell from the way that she was struggling to keep a straight face that Cece wasn’t actually mad but you weren’t gonna tell Luke that. He tried to kick Alex’s leg under the table but he hit yours instead. You hissed in pain and Luke paled even further.

“Shit, sorry, (Y/n).”

“And abusing my staff?” Cece joked, shaking her head.

Luke flashed her a charming smile as he rubbed the back of his neck. “Sorry, Cece. Just got a little excited.”

“I can see that.” She laughed then turned to you. “Hey. Get up. I got you something.”

You looked up at her in confusion but she didn’t offer you any answer as you dragged yourself up. Cece pulled a small blue box out from behind her back and handed it to you. “What’s the occasion?”

Cece rolled her eyes. “Just open it.” 

The first thing you saw was a folded piece of paper with your name on it, under it was a silver key. You picked it up and held it in between your fingers as you carefully unfolded the paper to see three words in Cece’s careful handwriting.

just in case

You looked up at her, eyebrows knitted together. “Cece?”

She just winked as she put her hand on your cheek. “Honey, you know that I couldn’t have more faith in you and your rockstar dreams. But just in case things don’t work out...well, I couldn’t imagine giving this place to anyone else.”

You flew into her arms and hugged her so tight it was a little painful. Of course, all you wanted was for Sunset Curve to get signed to a label and take over the world. But this place was like home to you and the idea of owning it some day made your heart swell. “Thank you!”

The booth erupted in cheers and Cece playfully glared at them as she tucked you under her arm. “But you have to promise you’ll keep these boys of yours from doing any more damage to the property.”

Bobby scoffed. “Hey, we’re not-”

You slapped your hand over his mouth before nodding at Cece. “I’ll try my best.”

The bell on the door jingled to announce the arrival of another customer, and Cece left to greet them. You twirled the key around in your hand and looked at the boys' smiling faces, unable to hide your own.

As you settled back in the booth and took a sip of your milkshake, you couldn’t help but feel like everything was coming together.

2020

L.A was somehow so different, yet exactly the way you remembered.

The way the bright lights flooded the streets, to the way that every surface you see was decorated with a piece of art, made you anxious to re-explore the city you loved so much. 

You couldn’t help but stare through your swinging legs at the crowds walking around below, listening to the soft buzzing of the Orpheum’s sign above your head.

An hour ago when Luke had suggested walking around the city, you figured you would end up here eventually. But now that you were actually here, you couldn’t help the hollow feeling that settled in your stomach.

It must’ve shown on your face because Luke launched into one of his motivational speeches. “C’mon, guys. I know being dead wasn’t our first choice. But you gotta admit, it is easier to get around.”

Reggie pouted. “Easy for you maybe. I lost my shirt on that one.”

You hadn’t even noticed that he was shirtless until it reappeared in a flash and he sighed in relief.

“So, why did you bring us here?” Alex asked Luke. “Just another painful reminder of where we never got to play?”

You smiled sarcastically. “Yeah, thanks, Luke.”

Luke rolled his eyes. “Because, we’re not done yet!”

He slung his arm around Alex’s shoulder, and gripped yours as he poofed you all down to the sidewalk, pulling away from you as fast as possible once your feet were back on the ground.

“I’m telling you.” Luke said. “We’ve been given a second chance. Let’s go see how many clubs we can hit before sunrise!”

He started walking down the street and Reggie was quick to follow, leaving you and Alex behind. As you watched them skip down the sidewalk, Alex let out a sharp ‘hey!’ and you whipped around to see him rubbing his shoulder.

A man in a long black suit stared straight into your eyes before tipping his hat to Alex and disappearing down the street. Every hair on your body stood on end as you stared at the spot where he was just standing.

“That was weird.” You said, turning to Alex. “You okay?”

He ran a hand through his hair. “Yeah, I’m good.”

You could hear Luke and Reggie’s excited shouting as they ran down the street, but you and Alex kept your distance. He reached his arm out to you and you took it automatically.

Over the last six months, Alex had become your best friend. You had always been close but last summer when things got bad with his parents, he turned to you.

And when things started to get weird between you and Luke or you had a fight with your mom, Alex was the only one you wanted to talk to. 

“Alright.” Alex sighed. “Out with it.”

“Out with what?”

“I know you’re dying to talk about Luke.”

“I am not!”

Alex raised his eyebrows, clearly not convinced.

“Besides, there’s nothing to talk about.”

“Nothing-” He took in a sharp breath. “(Y/n), for someone so smart, you’re acting like a dumbass.”

You put a hand on your chest, dramatically gasping. “Alexander Mercer! I had no idea you were capable of using that kind of language.”

He flashed you his middle finger before unlocking his arm from yours and pulling you into his side. “Seriously though. What’s rolling around up there?”

You were quiet for a few minutes as you rested your head on his shoulder. “I just want to know what I did, you know?” 

Alex nodded, but didn’t say anything, as he knew that you were just getting started.

“I mean, he’s always been there. He's always been my person. The one who I could count on for anything. Then that night in the studio, I thought…” 

You trailed off and Alex held you a little tighter. Even though he wasn’t there, he could probably describe that night in exact detail from the amount of times you had told him about it. “I just miss him."

“Yeah, I know.” Alex said, his eyes glued to Luke’s back. “But, hey, you know that he loves you, and that didn’t change because of one night.”

He started to say something else but cut himself off as he saw Reggie and Luke approaching, both with big, goofy smiles. Reggie took your arm that wasn’t around Alex’s back and locked it in his.

“What are you guys talking about?” He asked.

“Nothing!” You said way too fast, cringing to yourself as you dragged Reggie down the sidewalk. “Come on, Reg. Let’s go see if that old comic book shop is still around.”

As the night wore on, you became more and more thankful that you weren’t able to get tired.

You spent the whole night sneaking into concert venues, clubs, and pretty much any place you wanted now that there was no chance of getting caught. It wasn’t until you passed a small street-side café that you let yourself think about the one place you hadn’t been yet.

Cece’s Diner.

When Julie told you it had been 25 years, you assumed that it had closed down. That Cece had moved away. Maybe even reconnected with her son and lived out her life. It seemed like such a perfect thought that you didn’t want to ruin it with reality. 

But now that you had seen the way things had changed in the time you had been gone, you were now filled with a sense of urgency. You launched up the sidewalk until you were in front of the boys.

“Hey, guys?” You asked. They all stared at you curiously as a smile slowly spread across your face. “Anyone up for milkshakes?”

-

When you walked up to the diner - for only an instant - it was as if no time had passed. You felt the urge to run inside, throw your hair up in a ponytail, and make a beeline for the kitchen before you got in trouble for being late for your shift. 

Only as you got closer, you realized how much had changed. The building, which had always been a little ordinary and worn like a well-loved home, now felt about twenty stories tall. You dragged yourself forward toward the door, unable to look away.

The boys lingered behind you, but no one said a word. 

Your hand reached for the doorknob before you remembered that you wouldn’t actually be able to touch it.

I really gotta get used to that, you mumbled to yourself as you walked through the door.

It looked so different that you almost didn’t recognize it.

The bright blue paint had been replaced with brown on every wall, bookshelves lined the corners of the room, and long leather couches had replaced the booths and tables. The old jukebox had disappeared, and some old jazz song was playing over speakers over your head.

“Can I help you?” 

A voice asked from behind the counter. It was a boy that looked a little older than you, messy black hair and an uninterested smile. He dragged a blue pen across the margins of a book as he waited for your answer.

“You can see us?” Alex asked, to which the boy rolled his eyes.

“I’m talking to you, aren’t I?” He said, raising his eyebrows when you all failed to answer either of his questions.

“My, my. Aren’t we chatty.”

“Who are you, exactly?” You said, trying to mask your annoyance with a smile.

“Teddy.” He said, pushing himself off the counter and making his way around until he stopped just a few feet ahead of you. “And you’re (Y/n).”

A shiver ran down your spine. “How do you know that?”

“You were a friend of my grandma’s.”

Before you could ask what the hell he meant by that, a man came walking out of the kitchen. He looked so much like Cece that it made your stomach flip. It was her son.

And as you looked back at Teddy, your mind slowly connected the dots. “You’re Cece’s grandson?”

He nodded.

“Okay, this is just too weird.” You said as you rubbed your temples. There was no way that this was actually happening, right? Maybe you somehow fell asleep and are having some weird ghost dream. 

“Okay, well I definitely feel old.” Alex sighed.

Your head was spinning. “What is even happening right now.”

Teddy smiled. “Well, it’s too bad we’re dead or else I would buy you coffee and explain it to you.”

You internally cringed at his pick-up line but you couldn’t help but laugh a little. Normally, random guys flirting with you made you uncomfortable but behind his cocky attitude, he seemed like a genuine guy.

Maybe it was the way that he twirled his pen between his fingers the way that Cece used to, but something told you that there was more to him than meets the eye.

Before you could answer, Luke spoke up. “Well, it was nice meeting you. But we really should be getting back home.”

You could see that he was right as the pale light came in through the windows as the sky started to lighten.

But you couldn’t help but notice that this was the first time he had interjected in the conversation since you got there, and a small part of you wondered if that had anything to do with the way that Teddy was staring at you.

You shook those thoughts from your head, giving Teddy a soft smile.

“Maybe next time.”

Though you weren’t capable of getting cold, you still shivered a little as you walked through the door and back out onto the street. You could feel Luke’s eyes on the side of your face, flickering down to the sidewalk when he saw you looking.

You gave him a light nudge on the shoulder, and he gave you a soft smile that you couldn’t quite decipher the meaning behind.

That was pretty much all you got from Luke these days.

“So,” Luke said, his enthusiasm returning in full force as he threw his arms over Alex and Reggie’s shoulders. “I think it’s safe to say we’re officially back in business.”

-

The second that you landed in the studio, your jaw dropped.

Julie was sitting at the piano, her voice shaky but full of passion as she belted out the most beautiful song you’ve ever heard. Her fingers hit the keys expertly and you smiled.

You closed your eyes, listening to her voice echo through the room and getting lost in the warm feeling the lyrics filled you with. It wasn’t until she stopped singing and sniffled quietly that your heart dropped.

Both you and Alex surged forward to comfort her but Luke shook his head and swirled his finger, signaling to meet up outside. You wanted to protest. To stay and comfort your new friend.

But Julie sniffled again and you thought that maybe it would be a good idea to give her space. You made a mental note to talk to her later and poofed out of the garage.

-

In Life, In Death Taglist:

@ifilwtmfc @instabull @wanniiieeee @tenaciousperfectionunknown

JATP Taglist:

@caitsymichelle13

Let me know if you want to be added!

[fangaminghell]

I had a cute thought about Ren and Arrow. Arrow, aside from Melia, is the only other person that can probably fix and tinker with Ren's cyborg body ( they....know more about this than they'd like to admit). So I'm imagining either during the month of training or after v13, Arrow sat Ren down for a check up so to speak. And Ren's awfully nervous cause 1) he's part of team Xen and 2) he's pretty sure they caught on about Ren's crush on Imani and probably ain't the happiest about it.

I'm just imagining Ren sitting there super nervous as Arrow tinkers away. He tries to think of other things to keep him distracted, one of which is Imani and Aelita( probably about the milkshake date). The minute Ren starts thinking this Arrow goes " Ren, you're heating up," and Ren is honestly lucky it's just the two of them right now, cause his face turns red from embarrassment.

Ren calms down and mumbles an apology. Arrow simply hums in response and goes back to work. The silence....is starting to get to Ren. His nervousness around Arrow is starting to get to him, too. He gotta break the ice....somehow.

" So....uh," Ren starts, hoping that his nervousness isn't leaking in his voice, " You....seem close to Imani,"

' Why would you start with that?!' he immediately chastises himself, ' Now they'll think you're jealous or something!'

" I....I like to think we are," Arrow replies carefully, and Ren's almost surprised by how soft Arrow's voice has gotten, their voice almost always being pretty monotone.....sans that one time.

' Okay, good, they don't seem to think of me as a jealous ass-'

" Is that a problem?"

' Dammit'

" N-no! Not at all I just..." Ren wracks his brain for a good excuse, only to let his mouth run before his brain could keep up.

" You just seem protective of her, that's all,"

Shit. Fuck.

Arrow stops their work and Ren can feel their eyes big holes into the back of this head.

Fuck.

" And if I am? Are you sure you don't have a problem here,Ren."

' Why is this suddenly an interrogation?!'

" No, really, I don't. You just-"

" I just...."

" .....You kinda treat her like how Erin treats Melia and the twins. Like an older sibling, I guess,"

Arrow doesn't speak for a while, and for a second Ren thinks he messed up again. But the feeling of holes digging through his skull is no longer gone. They feel....more appreciative?

" I haven't thought of it like that but...I guess I do treat her like a little sister, huh?"

Ren nods, his nerves finally calming down.

" Her and Flynn. You kinda just took them under your wing,". And they seemed to latch onto Arrow as well. Ren remembers Imani and Flynn dragging Arrow along the base like two little kids wanting to show their big sibs something,their excitement rubbing off on the tired Arrow.

" Hehe," Arrow chuckles, going back to work on Ren's cyborg body, " Yeah, I really did,did I?"

" I never really was an older sibling. The closest I got to that was with Alex, all those years ago. I guess I always wanted to be one?" Arrow shakes their head, " Though it's proven to be a handful. Especially when said siblings can be a handful,"

" Tell me about it" Ren dryly agrees, remembering all the times Reina did something just when Ren told her not to do so. How many dangerous situations she's been in now? He knows he can handle herself perfectly fine, but it's still slightly worrying-

" I guess it's nice. To have someone to protect, I mean," Arrow interrupts Ren's thoughts yet again, " Unlike how-"

Arrow pauses, both in their words and work. It takes a second for them to get back to work.

" I'm not gonna finish that." Ren nods solemnly.

" Yeah,"

Silence once more. Much more comfortable than the beginning of this whole thing.

" Also," Arrow speaks up this time, " You really don't need my permission to date Imani. That's her choice, not mine,"

Ren face flares red.

" W-wait- how did you-"

" Figured it out when you called me an older sibling- you're done by the way," Arrow pats Ren's back, fully finished with the repairs.

" I-"

" But if you really want my permission, I'll give you it," Arrow stands up, stretching. They look down at Ren, and their neutral expression turns into a cold glare.

" But if you harm her in any way, I will personally dismantle you and burn your body parts with you watching. Understand?"

Ren is too stunned to speak, only being able to nod. Arrow's cold glare turns back into their normal neutral expression.

" Good. Don't heat up too much, you'll ruin your circuits,"

And with that Arrow walks off, leaving a stunned Ren in their wake.

[legaciezzz]

Boy Problems

Hope x Male Reader

Genre: Chapter Fic

Request: Hi, uh so I'm new to the legacies fandom so if this request sucks.. Sorry. Could you do one where the readers a human and mystic falls high. Hopes upset that landon moving on and is lonely, the readers also sad becuase he just got dumped, so they become fuck buddies but fall for each other. When everyone remembers hope, landon tries to win hope back but she's already fallen in love with the reader and picks him over landon. Uh if you Could write smut please.. If you're comfortable that is

A/N: Welcome to the fandom! Don't worry the request is just fine!

Song: Imported by Jesse Reyez ft. 6lack

You sighed before stepping out of your car. It had been two weeks since your ex dumped, just as things seemed to be getting serious, so now you've been spending nights like these alone lately. You got out and started to walk across town square, as you made you way to the grill you noticed a girl on one of the benches, but the closer you got you could hear some crying.

"Hey."

Hope glanced up at you then quickly looked away to wipe her tears. "Hey."

"You okay?" you said.

"Yeah. Just boy problems."

"I feel that-- I mean girl problems, not boy problems." You stammered as you tried to correct yourself, which made her huff a laugh. "I'm Y/N, by the way."

"Hope."

"Hey, you know what helps with boy problems? Stuffing your face with food. I'm actually heading to the grill if you want, must be pretty chilly out here."

She looked up at you and flashed a soft smile. "I'm fine."

You nodded before heading off inside but later came back with a to go bag and a milkshake.

"Mind if I sit here?" you asked.

Hope didn't expect to see you as she looked up over her shoulder again.

"I know what you said, but misery loves company, right?"

"Thanks." she said, sliding over.

You sat down, laying the food out between you two. "I don't know what you like, so I just got you a burger and fries."

"That's alright."

“You want to talk about it? The boy problems?”

“You know, I’ve kind of spilled my guts to a stranger already.”

“Well I bet that stranger didn’t get you any comfort food.” you said,  popping a french fry  in you mouth.

“Actually, he did give me a peanut butter blast.”

“Peanut butter blast, really? I’ve always kind of thought was overrated.”

Hope raised her eyebrows with a light smile. “Oh really? And what’s your shake of choice?”

“Strawberry. And you know what’s even better than that?”  You took the lid off your milkshake and dipped another one of your fries in it. 

“What are you doing?” she laughed.

“What? It’s good, it’s the perfect combination of sweet and salty. Come on, don’t hate on it until you’ve tried it.”

She shook her head. “No way.”

“Fine, but you’re missing out.” you said, eating it.

The two sat on the bench and talked while you ate. You asked her if she was new in town so you gave a run down  of the workings of Mystic Falls and Hope nodded along to all the things she already knew and then you both got into your relationship problems. Then eventually it got late and was time to go home.

“You need a ride home?”

“No, it’s fine. You’ve already done enough, it’s all good.”

“You sure? It’s really not a problem.”

“I’m sure. I, uh,  live close to to here actually.”

“Alright then. “ you said getting up, and patting your pockets for that pencil you forgot to put in your binder. “Well I’m just going to leave my number here on this napkin and if you need a friend or anything, feel free to hit me up.”

. . .

You got home after the big fight with the stallions and was patching yourself up when Hope sent you a text asking if you were free to hang out.

"Hey. Come in."

"Hey. Your parents home?" she asked as she stepped inside, making sure she wasn't interrupting anything.

"No. My mom's working late and my dad's out with some friends, we're good." you assured her before closing the door behind her.

You made your way back to the couch to make another attempt at bandaging your hand and that's when Hope saw it along with the shiner on your temple.

"What happened?" she asked, sparked with concern.

"You did hear? There was this huge brawl between the Timberwolves and the Stallions after the game. Again apparently."

"Are you okay?"

"Oh yeah, don't worry it could've been worse. Like this one guy, Aaron: broken nose."

You continued to wrap your hand until Hope intervened, taking a seat next to you. "Here. Let me help you with that." she said, seeing as you were doing it wrong.

You watched her, she was gentle and you noticed how soft her hands were. You then looked up at her and just stared for a moment.

"What?" Hope asked, catching you after she was done.

"Nothing." you said, but still somehow you couldn't take your eyes off her. She was just so pretty. You just kept staring into those blue eyes of hers, then you noticed your gaze slipping down to her lips.

To your surprise, she leaned in first for the kiss. You kissed once before pulling back, then you both dove back in. She grabbed your neck and pulled you closer while your went up her thigh. Eventually, you found yourself on top of her, your hand gliding up to her breast.

You could feel yourself growing hard as things progressed, and so could she. She broke away from you. "You have any--"

"In my room."

You two got up from the couch and went to your room where you started to strip each other of your clothes, kicking the door shut behind you.

As soon as your underwear fell to the floor she immediately pushed you onto bed, crawling in your lap. You could feel your cock getting even stiffer from her hips rocking back and forth.

You reached over into your desk drawer beside your bed and took out a condom. Hope lifted her hips up so you could slip the rubber on. She lowered herself onto you. Moans fell from both of your lips as she adjusted to your size.

She wrapped her arms around you as she began to ride you, her pace starting slow. she let out a moan which was muffled by your lips. She held on tight as you rocked your body. You felt your lips move along her jaw as your hands grabbed her ass.

"Fuck.." she groaned as you nipped at her ear.

You moved down, biting gently down on her collarbone and leaving a mark. Hope bit her lip as she started to ride harder.  You felt your lips move along her bare chest as you moved downward. You used your bandaged hand to knead her breast . As you did so Hope arched her back, moaning as you teased her. 

"Ah..yeah..." You moved your lips to her nipple, sucking on it and making her gasp.

You stopped her  a second then flipped her over onto the bed, as you did so you lost your balance and fell on top of her. You both laughed as you propped yourself back up.

“Sorry, that usually goes better.” you said.

Hope giggled as she kissed you. She pressed your body up against hers as you slid back into her. You started to thrust your hips and eventually you found your way back to the pace you guys were once at before as you felt her legs wrap around your waist.

"Mmmm.." you moaned.

"Oh fuck.." Hope whined.

You quickened your pace and a few moments later you could feel yourself coming closer to your climax.  You could also tell she was coming as her body convulsed and she dug her nails into your back. You gently ran your fingertips over her clit.

"I'm gonna..." she said in a long-winded whine as you felt her tighten around you.

You guys came and rode out your highs together. You collapsed besides her. “Wow..”

“Yeah...” Once you guys caught your breath, she got up and slipped on your shirt. “I should get cleaned up.” 

“For sure,” you said, sitting up. “It’s the second door on the right.”

She left and you took of your condom and threw it away, using a tissue to clean off the excess on you. You then crashed back on to the bed and when Hope got back, you were already passed out. 

The next morning, the both of you tangled amongst the sheets, you were woken up by a loud knock at your door. "Y/N, get up. You're gonna be late for school." you heard your father say.

You swore under your breath as you glanced over to Hope who looked just as startled as you. "I'm up." you called out.

"I'm off to work. And your mom's asleep so don't wake her up."

"Alright, see ya."

You waited for your father to leave before you and Hope started to scramble for your clothes and slip them on.

As you guys made you way to the door, you paused when you caught a glance of the kitchen. "Shit. Hey, I'll buy you breakfast on our way to school."

"it's fine, you don'––"

"You serious? Breakfast is the most important meal of the day. Don't worry about it." you smiled, holding the door for her.

You pulled up to the school after making a pitstop for some coffee and whatnot. You sat awkwardly quiet for a second before Hope opened the door.

"Thanks." Hope said.

"Yeah, no problem.. I had a good time last night."

"Me too... Anyways I should probably get going." She opened the door and step, grabbing her coffee, then Maya ran into her.

"Y/N, I didn't know you knew Hope." Maya greeted.

"Just giving the her a ride, that's all." you replied, flashing a friendly smile.

"And a coffee? I should let you drive me around too." she joked.

"Alright, I better find a place to park. See you guys around."

While you drove off, Maya teased Hope about you as they walked together, but Hope wasn't really one to kiss and tell.

You guys still saw each other around school, but the next time you hooked up was at a house party Maya convinced Hope to going to. You had caught her sitting on a couch as everyone else mingled. You managed to get her to loosen up and dance with you then when one thing led to another, you two ended up hook up in the bathroom.

After that you and Hope found yourselves hooking up even more, mostly when you were feeling lonely. Then because it felt good and you had grown really fond of each other. As your 'relationship' progressed, you started hooking up not just outside of school, like texting each other during class to make out under the bleachers. Soon people started notice how much you two hung out, the hickeys on your neck and how Hope sometimes wore your letterman's jacket.

There was a fine line between whether you and Hope were dating or just something casual. You agreed on labelling yourselves as friends, even though at this point you knew there was a real connection forming, but you were okay with that or at least you thought you were. There would be days where she would run off with no explanation and when she returned she suddenly started act strange around you.

"I don't know, Man, she just seems weird all the time lately. You think it's her ex?" you said to Ethan as you helped set up for the Commonwealth Day festival.

"Have you thought of talking to her, maybe?" He replied.

"Come on, no one wants to be that guy."

"Do you like her?"

"I don't know. Things are just better when she's around and I don't want anything screw it up."

"Then I think you know what you should do. Anyways, we should get to practice."

As you guys left for practice, you looked around for Hope only to find that she disappeared somewhere. This was becoming very like her now.

You kept thinking about Hope throughout the day and what you might say. You tried texting her a couple times here and there, but she didn't answer.

After you when done with you were done with your plans for the day, you went to the festival where saw Hope at one of the tables.

"Hope?" you said, taking a seat by her.

"Y/N. Hey." she said a bit solemnly.

"Where have you been all day? I tried texting you."

"Sorry. Something came up with some old friends."

"Yeah, that seems to be happening a lot lately." You sighed. "Hey, I need to ask you something."

She looked at you and just at you were about to open your mouth, you were interrupted.

"Hope?"

You both turned your heads to see a curly haired boy.

"Landon."

[angelfics]

Eternal

couple : optional bias

genre : Romantic, Angst

words: 1746

summary : everyone leaves but you need someone to walk the path with you

The beaming sunlight shined through the window, passing the white curtain and reaching the old dusty carpet. The dim room was lightened up with the flames of a lighter.You brought the lighter close to the cigarette between your lips.

When you lowered the lighter, your gaze fell on the boy next to you, you could only see his bare shoulders going up and down slowly under the blanket.

Memories from a few hours ago came to your mind, your naked bodies against each other, the kisses, and the sound of moans that filled the room. now you were lying on the bed next to him and playing with the lighter in your hand.

Was it the right decision? Kissing him back when he kissed you, was that right?

"I love you"

His voice echoed in your mind like the first alarm in the morning, it didn't let you sleep. You still remembered his face when he said these words, his determined eyes, his lips pressing together, his hands locked on the table in front of you.

"I love you"

It kept repeating over and over like a tape, bringing a vibration to your body.

Your best friend had said these words to you, he had kissed you, he had touched you.

You looked at the boy next to you whom you trusted more than anyone, was he the same guy as before? Now naked under the blanket, he bore no resemblance to your best friend.

His menly hands had touched your body, his body had become one with you, he had made you his own.

So what was this strange feeling you had inside? Cold from head to toe, a slight tremor, heaviness in your soul.

"I love you”

damn it! You heard his voice again. you closed your eyes and puffed the cigarette, the fading smoke rose up in the semi-dark room.

You have never felt this way before, he has always been a close friend to you, nothing more. But when he kissed your lips, you felt that you needed those lips as if they were oxygen, and that was your first mistake.

The second mistake was coming to this king sized bed, in his small suite with tainted walls and paintings covering every corner, from trees and animals to tangled and rough shapes of faces. They all kind of reminded you of your best friend.

Best friend? What exactly were you now? What would you do if he woke up and wanted you to leave his house and never come back? What if he didn't want you in his life anymore?

You could’nt stand it.

You got up from the bed to find a cigarette butt, walking in the cluttered room, you laid your eyes upon the sheets and paintings around you, an empty cup of coffee on his desk caught your eye, you walked over to it, shaking the ashes of the cigarette inside the half empty cup. You stood by the desk, the light shining in through the window and illuminating the table surface, the multitude of black pen drawings and sketches caught your attentio

He was always messy.

You smiled and put your hand on the surface of the paintings, picked them up to clean up the table, being careful not to wake him up. When the table was finally set, your eyes became acquainted with the small design sketch notebook, which you had bought for his birthday three years ago, he still had it?

You put the cigarette between your lips and picked up the sketch notebook to turn the pages.

You paused when you saw the familiar face in it, there was a sketch of your face on the first page, from the hairstyle and your clothes, you knew this was on his birthday, the day you bought him this present. you were looking at your phone aware of him drawing you.

You flipped through the rest of the pages, each of them was a sketch of you, picturing you while you were eating, driving, reading a book, smoking, all this time he had been painting you and you hadn’t noticed? Seeing these sketches was like seeing yourself through the eyes of someone else.

You looked at the last sketch, it was from two days ago. You went to karaoke together, it was only a silhouette, but could you sort out the smile on your face and your hands which held the microphone tightly. A faint smile appeared on your face, recalling the memories of that day.

You looked at the last page, it was blank, but yesterday’s date was written on it, the night he confessed to you, he wanted to draw you again? When ? while you were enjoying your favorite banana milkshake? Or when you were lying next to him completely naked?

"Oops, looks like I'm busted."

you jumped at the sound of his voice, you were so engrossed in the notebook that you didn't notice he had woken up.

You moved the cigarette from your lips and said, "What is this?"

He came forward and clung to you from behind, put his hands on both sides of the edge of the table, locking your body in his body.

"This is my idea of ​​the world."

"These are all sketches from me"

"Exactly .. my world is you" you frowned confusedly and put the notebook on the table, then dropped the half-burnt cigarette in the coffee cup so that it would go out on its own.

You turned to him with a serious look on your face.

"What’s wrong?" he asked as his eyebrows furrowed

"What's gonna happen now? What are we going to do?"

He took a deep breath before answering, "It's up to you. I told you my feelings and I was honest with you. Now it's your turn to be honest with me."

"I was not prepared for this "

"Last night you seemed pretty prepared," he said. You pushed him away and threw your hands in frustration.

“I..I’m confused”

"You mean you don't want us to be together?"

"It's not that easy .. You're the only boy I trust if -"

"If What?" He took a step forward

"What if you leave me? Then who else do I have?"

"Why should I leave you?" He said softly and stepped closer.

"Because this is what people do .. they say they will be by your side until the end, but then they leave you" You looked away and stared at one of the paintings.

"I promise to try to stay with you forever, how is that?" You stared into his brown eyes, you knew he was right, but you couldn’t believe him.

People always leave, this life has proved it to you, your friends, your ex lovers, your mother ... they all leave one day and you are left alone.

You sighed and stepped back to sit on the bed, covering your face with both hands.

"I don’t want to lose you"

He knelt beside you, took your hands and brought them down.

"You are not going to lose me"

"You want me to be your girlfriend"

"Well we can be best friends who love each other"

You bit your lip and remained silent for a few moments.

"Why did you draw me?"

"Because I wanted to look at you when you're not around"

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"I wanted to draw the real you, the person you are when no one’s looking, you should fall in love with people in these moments, when they think no one's looking at them."

"Did you fall in love with me in those moments?" you asked, he nodded slowly.

You grabbed his hands, which were still around your wrists and squeezed them.

"Did you want to draw me yesterday too?"

"Yeah, I was waiting for you to fall asleep... I had never seen you like this before .. but man you wouldn’t sleep." You both laughed.

"Well .. do you still want to draw me?" You shrugged.

"draw you?" He raised his eyebrows

"Yeah, it’s the last page of the notebook? Don't you want me to pay attention to the painter in at least one of them?"

He smiled and nodded, stood up and went to the desk to pick up his notebook, while he was looking for his pencil and eraser. You quickly jumped to the other side of the bed and put on his T-shirt. He looked at you in surprise.

"If you are going to stare at me, I do not want to be naked." You just shrugged. He laughed and nodded.

He sat down on a desk chair and spread the notebook to begin with.

"What should I do?"

"I want to draw your face, so just smile" You nodded, took a deep breath and gave him the most beautiful smile you had. He started immediately, drawing lines on the blank page, raising his head from time to time to look at you. Each time your eyes met, your heart beat faster.

You looked at his calm face, his hand moving up and down quickly on the paper, his perfect body with the sun shining on his back, he was the greatest man you had ever seen. you thought about what had happened last night, you enjoyed it too, you wanted this too, now that you were sitting in front of him, there was not the slightest bit of regret in you.

People always leave, but only those who accompany you along the way matter, and he, as a close friend, has walked and accompanied you for a long time. If you were to trust someone, he was sitting right in front of you.

Finally he finished his work, straightened up and turned the notebook. Your eyes shined with excitement, seeing your face looking at you with a smile on the paper.

"this is great" you said excitedly. He laughed and stared at the painting "yes ..."

You had made your decision, you had to make a choice, you got up, went to him, took the notebook in your hand and put it on the desk.

Your arms wrapped around his neck and you sat in his lap, he looked at you in surprise, you pressed your foreheads together

"I love you too,"you said.

His voice was still repeating in your head, but this time it was a pleasant lullaby telling you that the impossible is possible and that some people will stay with you forever.