#i mean i’ve had worse and for longer but fuck me i HURT

[bending-sickle]

i hurt i hurt i hurt i hurt i hurtihurtihurt

[ethanthealien]

Things That Hurt When You Have Fibromyalgia That Should Not Hurt:

Blood pressure cuffs when doctors take your blood pressure.

A simple poke from someone else, especially on the tender points

Tripping over something - only mildly, not a bad trip. I trip over things and it hurts like a Bitch.

If I accidentally graze my arm or my body against a wall a bit or something, it also hurts like a Bitch. Again, I'm not talking about badly, I'm not being pushed into a wall or something.

Standing. Just for a few seconds. I actually don't know for sure if this is really a part of my fibromyalgia or actually normal for everyone. But it really fucking hurts to stand for even a few seconds.

Walking for even just an hour hurts. And the longer I walk, the worse it hurts.

The simple act of. Cooking. It hurts to hold the pots/pans, especially with one hand. I can't really lift pans/pots because I'm weak, but also it just Hurts. It hurts to mix things in the pots/pans.

(Others can feel free to add on).

Common Descriptions Of Pain When You Have Fibromyalgia:

Feeling like your whole body is bruised, or some parts of your body.

"Feels like I was in a car crash"

Stiffness, throbbing, aching, soreness, tenderness, fatigue. Your body feels exhausted, and not even necessarily that YOU feel tired, but your body feels tired.

"Feels like being stabbed with a knife"

"Like someone has taken a hammer and hammered all over my body"

"Like I'm hungover"

"Like I ran a marathon"

"Like perpetually having the flu", "Like you have a fever constantly"

“It feels like I’ve been carrying two huge buckets of water that I can’t put down.”

"Like I did a full body workout"

(Amongst many other descriptions)

Common Habits I've Developed Throughout My Life As A Result Of Having Fibromyalgia:

Constantly leaning against walls and frequently switching which foot I'm leaning on more.

Asking people if they wanted to sit down, or if they wanted a chair to sit down somewhere, because I thought they were in pain too. Them declining and me thinking "but doesn't it hurt to stand?? You've been standing for like 15 minutes, aren't you in pain??" They are not.

Constantly sitting down, and/or wanting to sit down, wishing I had a place to sit down.

Not really a habit, but I always end up freaking out a bit when I worry that I've hurt someone. I realized that I would constantly apologize to my girlfriend because I thought I hurt her accidentally (very mild things I mean, I'm not saying I fucking punch him or some shit lmfao), only for her to be confused and say that it didn't hurt. It takes conscious effort to remember that what hurts me does not hurt most other people without fibromyalgia or a different chronic pain condition.

I've had fibromyalgia for pretty much my entire life.

I believed that these things were normal for everyone.

I would look at people and watch how they'd do things like simply lifting up a box or the ways people talk about walking for hours just for fun and just not understand why they were doing it because that hurts?

Growing up, when my brother would ""lightly"" punch me, or my dad would poke me, etc., it always hurt really bad, and my brother shamed me (my brother was severely abusive in many ways, yes) and would go "oh my God, please, you're being dramatic, I didn't even punch you/poke you hard at all." I truly don't think he WAS punching me that hard, I just had fibromyalgia so it hurt like twenty times worse (I'm not excusing his behavior, by the way, I'm just explaining that things that would hurt somebody with fibromyalgia wouldn't hurt most other people without it).

I grew up constantly wishing that I could float so that I didn't have to walk or stand.

I was always aware that I had certain spots around my body that felt much more painful than other parts of my body, such as the sides of my arms, my hips, etc. I also just figured this was how it is for everyone.

If you relate to anything this post, I definitely suggest seeing a rheumatologist or a neurologist (I was diagnosed by a rheumatologist) and finding out the cause of your pain.

None of these things are "normal."

[occamstfs]

Chauffeur Swap

Another epistolary TF ! Cocky office worker to an equally cocky gym bro, trait swap + IQ Drain aplenty -Occam

Monday May 6th

Morning 

I’m beyond thrilled that I’m finally being looked at for a promotion. I’ve worked my ass off for this company ever since I graduated and I am not going to let this chance slip through my fingers. It’s such a good gig, in the week leading up to them filling the position they’re letting us use the company’s chauffeurs as just one little hint of the luxury this promotion will afford us.

At least, that’s what I thought before my driver arrived to pick me up and I saw what a slob of a man my driver was! I mean my word! I thought it was a prank or something else untoward! I’m sure he could tell too, I could not muster even a shy smile, nothing to do but grimace. God and that was before I got in! He must have just been an Uber hired or something because it smelled like a locker room in there! Truly vile!

God willing this is a one off occurrence, hate to get the oaf in trouble. Though judging by the state of his hygiene though he clearly needs to be taught a lesson somehow! I mean even with this job I couldn't afford to buy cologne enough to hide that stink- perhaps some dog-strength febreze- Ha!

Evening

Godddd fuck! The last thing I needed after such a stressful day was to be greeted by that animal’s face- worse yet, his SCENT! I underestimated just how grueling this interview charade would be. It is just one final hurdle to the big leagues though. I will leave petty contrivances like suffering through this unpleasant car ride behind.

Just to make the time pass with greater speed I put forth some small talk. Not like I could hold my breath near long enough to make a difference, and it couldn’t hurt to vent about what a hassle the day had been hm? After this though he started talking about himself and fwoh- could I not care less about whatever surely protein-fart based drivel or beer-brained diatribe he launched into. 

Perhaps this is unfair, I did not deign to listen to him. So perhaps he’s better than he seems. But who could blame me, sitting in that car was punishment enough to earn me tuning him out. And! And! For him to have the benefit of the doubt surely he could at least wear deodorant! Hm. Unless he is trying? God that would be depressing, to be so, ugh- I continue to hold out hope I never see him again

Tuesday May 7th

Morning

Mm, I simply must develop a better poker face if I am to continue to suffer in this odor for the week, god forbid even longer- I have prepared accordingly however, yesterday no one mentioned it at work but I swear I kept smelling it, him, all day? Same when I got home, just everytime I calmed down from work bam! I smelled this horrid car ride. I am bringing my cologne to work with me, I plan to put it at lest once more when I arrive at work.

It’s just, Why is this my problem right! I don’t know what his problem is, but I don’t see why I have to suffer because of it right? I should not have to deal with someone like this, he’s supposed to be working for me. I uh, it’s not like I think I’m better than him I just, well I am better than him. Hm, I lost my train of thought. 

Ugh, I keep spacing out today- I’m sure it has to do with my twice-daily rides with, hm. I don’t even know his name. It’s? You know I don’t care. I just need to take it easy, I’m not letting this fucking dude-bro pitstain of a man bother me this much! I’m getting my bag and he is not worth a second further of my, uh, attention.

Evening

I have a headache and I don’t know how it is his fault but it has to be. This whole thing is setting me on edge, I need to chill about Ben. That’s right Ben! I got his name, I actually told him about my headache and he told me that he usually meditates to clear his mind- which crazy that someone so, despite all appearances, mindful treats his body like a sty but- Well not a sty I suppose, or at the very least a well built one- 

Ah, that’s not quite appropriate is it. God he is hot though. Honestly sitting there just breathing in his, uh, scent, helped with the headache. Wait no, it was the meditation, God, why can I not stop thinking of his fucking B.o. My headache was gone but now I feel I’m beginning to run a fever, or at the very least I need to turn down the AC or something-

Better not affect my work tomorrow.

Wednesday May 8th

Morning 

Not gonna be a good one. I fucking woke up late which ive literally never done before! I barely got myself up and ready in time and didn’t realize until the car but I didn’t bring my cologne with me. It turned out to be the least of my problems however as when I got in his car I fully spilled my coffee all over the backseat. Hopefully this will mask his putridity because I now have to sit in the front with him for the ride.

He must know. He has to know it has to be some kinda sick, uh, fetish or something. Its untendable untenable. god get your shit together Jacob. Its so hard to focus on anything else now that Im sitting right by him. I need to talk to someone about this, fuck its like hes exposing his pits on purpose. He wants me to stare at him, i bet. Bet he gets some sort of sick rise out of me. Im sure him and all the other chauffeurs probably get together and jack off about how repulsive and, uh, strong they all are.

God Fuck! Get me out of this car im losing my mind! Need to, ill just get some work done on the commute, should help i think. God its getting hot in here again or something, so help me if this fucker starts actively sweating im gonna lose it

Evening

i just couldnt get anything done today i dont know what was fucking up dude? it was just so hot in there and i mustve forgotten to put deodorant on this morning, people kept complaining but i didnt even notice? i guess i was sweating more than usual, but like, it was so hot in that office and my clothes felt weird, tight almost. As if tho, lol im sure no one even really noticed that i was off.

OH speaking of, Ben really put himself together on the ride home today. He was wearing a button up and everything, must have seen how nice im living and got his shit together! Maybe ive been to hard on the douche? nah car still smelled like shit haha! Or i think it did? didnt really notice it until like halfway thru?

Fuck my clothes are so tight all of a sudden, godd its so hot actually. I look fucking huge in this tiny little monkey suit- almost like Benjamin ha- as if id stoop so low, even if i started getting massive not like id be dum enough to be on his level lol

Thursday May 9th

Morning

Fuckin couldnt find ANYTHING this morning dude! it was like someone came in and took or hid everything i need for work today. ended up having to just fuckin leave for the car without a suit jacket- pretty sure ive got an extra in my office tho so were chill there. mm probably shouldve shaved tho lol

Oh yeah the files! i had some reports that i needed to bring in but totally couldnt find them! Turns out benjamin had them the whole time it was weird, guess i left them last night. but he was like such an ass about it, like he knows anything though the uh, jock, jerk uh. hes actually dressed better than me rn isnt he. Finally threw on a dress shirt, surely inspired by me haha- pulling it off quite well too, his chest hair peaking up through mm-

Fuckkk dude my cocks kinda getting hard looking at him, starting to smell musty in the car too, wait oh shit i didnt even notice that it didnt reek when i got in! weird that its starting to stink now tho whats up with that, looks like hes finally noticing tho ha! its nice to see him finally react to how bad my uh, no how I GOD, how bad fuckin’ he stinks obviously. whatever, ive got more important stuff to think about.

Evening 

okay work was like, not fuckin chill today. idk what was up but like, every little thing i did today just wasnt good enough apparently like okay?? you know me, if something seems off clearly, fucking OBVIOUSLY it uh, i? god my head just keeps going blank i dont get it, im just. Huh, kinda smells like Ben all of a sudden, oh fuck lol my pits have completely sweat through my shirt-

None of this matters anyway though bro! Because i just had the BEST sesh with Ben after work!! honestly the work shit doesnt even bother me, shouldve seen me its like i am a natural at this shit i was getting a pump like ive done it a hundred times. im sure it smelled like a locker room on the ride home lol

OH! I didnt even say, it was all ben’s idea!!! he said the gym always helps him when uh, things get too hard to think about and fuckk bro hes so right. hes so, lol i almost said hes so smart- he definitely knows how to work out though, he kept helping me with my technique but im prety sure he just wanted an excuse to touch me- 

not that im complaining LMAO- every time he did it was like i felt myself getting stronger, and less worried about all those yes-man suit fuckers! hed adjust my arms and i would feel my biceps just suddenly pump larger, hed bump his hands into my pecs while spotting me and theyd just force the bar up even faster, wish hed just go ahead and grab my cock lol

theres time yet too- gonna crash at his place tonight! hopefully ill get to see him put his magic fingers and tight body to use cause fuck bro idk if it was the pump or what but i dont think my balls have ever been this blue, like any time i try to think about, oh ughh, work i just. mm everything in my body just begs me to fucking blow a load- 

Friday May 10th

Morning

fucker just went to bed early- got me all riled up and then i had to jack off alone. felt way better than usual tho, my cock seems bigger to lol, dk whats up with that. wanted to try again this morning but ben was just on my fucking ass trying to get me out the door 

i didnt have any of my clothes, duh, so i just threw on some of his, crazy how much they fit me? they even kinda already smell like me lol. he actually put a suit on which seems wild, funny that i look like a slob and he looks like some uh, fancy guy. Like i should right? uhh is my headache coming back? lol idk but looking at him in that fucking suit sure is making it hard to focus-

ben said i can just change n stuff when we got to the office, its why hes dressed up. ill go ahead and drive us and then hell just run up and get my clothes, idk if theyll fit tho? feel like im larger than i was for some reason- oh yeah my massive fucking pump lol- 

mh speaking of pump, maybe while hes up there ill have time to jack another one out, not like anyonell see or care ya? like its a problem im about to be the fuckin alpha of this company or uh, something. itll be done before hes back, only evidence will be cum stains on his clothes lol. ugh it smells so fucking dank in here i might just cum without touching it lol

Evening

shit man, dont know what i was doing? i feel like i was supposed to go into work today but ben says from now on im just his driver. which easy gig right lol? doesnt even care that i dont shower huhuh-

he got his big promotion today!!! he looked so smug and hot when he came down to tell me, and he promised wed have some fun about it when he got home tonight- just gotta drop him off at some stupid fancy dinner ill probably hit the gym while hes there. gotta keep it up or ill look like some fucking dweeb

plus that means ill get the car totaly filled with my bo- hell fuckin love that, after he gets a good whiff no way wil he not want to fuck then and there huhuh fuck, kinda needs to get that exercise in now that hes doing whatever bitchass shit they do all they day up there needs to give in and just fuck me finally its been so, ugh long and my balls feel so full, and im sweating so much god im fogging up the windows loli better be careful i need to keep it together until then urgh- 

god i just smell so fucken hot

[foreingersgod]

Literally my favorite wbb writer on here😭💕💕!! Could you maybe write kate Martin x reader angst?

UGGHHH, i love you all so much, your support means the world to me!! thank you sm :’)

Thick and Thin . KM

pairing: kate martin x reader

synopsis: you and kate go through a rough patch

A/N: NOT PROOF READ

༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶

to say you were a supportive girlfriend would be an understatement, you went to every game, every event, comforted kate after every loss and celebrated after every win. any athlete would be lucky to have you at their side. and at the beginning of your relationship, kate knew that. she was so grateful that she had you in her life. if you weren’t there on the side lines cheering her on or doting on her whenever she needed it, she wouldn’t be where she’s at now.

but as of recently, she’d become too entangled in the game. sure, an athlete like herself would obviously be committed and stressed when it came to their sport. but kate had always made sure you understood that you were her number one priority, basketball second. she wanted to make sure you knew how much she loved you, showing you the same amount of love and support that you always showed her. and for a while, it was working out fine. you split your girlfriend duties 50/50 and made sure each other were always satisfied and happy in the relationship.

now, though, it felt like kate has just stopped caring. you weren’t sure if it was graduation, or saying goodbye to the team, she wouldn’t talk to you at all. she was cold and more distant than normal. she didn’t help you out around the house, she didn’t bring you home flowers every friday night like she used to, she didn’t kiss you goodnight or pull you into her chest before bed, you felt suddenly neglected. kate was acting like a completely different person and it was really starting to take a toll on you.

you tried to let this phase run its course in hopes that she’d return to her normal self again, but things seemed to only be getting worse. she started coming home later than normal, stopped taking you to banquets and events. hell, she didn’t even care that you waited for her outside the locker room after each game to see her. instead, she would brush past you to talk to her friends and family. it’s like you were invisible.

no matter how much it hurt you, you still wanted to support your girlfriend and kept going to the games and cheering her on, even if she didn’t notice you were there.

but on this particular night, outside the locker room once more, something inside you told you to wait for her and figure out what was going on. you weren’t going to be brushed off any longer.

you felt like you were going to melt, sitting on the bench outside the doors. your heart was racing and your head was spinning hoping that she’d be the next one to walk out. and soon enough, your prayers were answered, kate came waltzing through the doors moments later. duffel bag in hand, hair pulled back into a messy ponytail. surprisingly, she saw you and walked over to see you.

“hey, i’m gonna go over to hannah’s place to hang out with the girls tonight” she looked down at her phone, typing out a text. figures, she couldn’t even look at you “i don’t know when i’ll be home so. ill probably see you in the morning”

you scoffed, now she wasn’t even coming home with you anymore? is the only time she’s going to talk to you is to tell you she’s leaving? your blood must’ve been boiling, your heart sank watching her completely blow you off.

“what’s that all about?” she asked, irritated.

“nothing, nothing” you sighed, beginning to walk away “do whatever you want i don’t fucking care”

she grabbed your wrist, forcing you to stop in your tracks and talk to her “what’s your fucking problem? i can’t go out with my team now? i thought you were supposed to be a supportive girlfriend, huh?”

“really? you’re going to pull that card?” now you were fuming, you were lucky no one was around to witness this “i’ve been nothing but supportive, kate. you know that! i do everything i possibly can to be supportive. and all i ask if that you do the same for me, but you’ve quite literally treated me like shit these past few weeks!”

“that’s such bullshit-”

“no it’s not kate! you’re not even home anymore! you don’t buy me flowers or take me out on dates like you used to! i don’t even remember the last time you kissed me because you’re too fucking busy with all this other shit! and when it’s late and i’m waiting out here for you, time and time again, you blow me off to go out with the team. again. it never ends, kate”

“i don’t know why you’re choosing to bring this up now” she yelled “lets just go home, fuck, i won’t go out tonight if you’re gonna make a scene!”

“you’re unbelievable, kate i hope you know that” you wanted to scream “go home, go with the team, i truly don’t care. but im not gonna keep doing this with you.” you pushed past kate, who was trying to drag you out to the car at this point, making your way to the door and storming down the street alone.

“where the hell are you going, YN” she chased after you “seriously, what the fuck, let’s just go home, i’m sorry!”

you ignored her and kept walking, if she was going to treat you like this, then you weren’t going to put up with her anymore. you’d stay at a friends place or a hotel if it meant you didn’t have to take this neglect anymore.

kate persisted, still chasing you down the side walk, dodging numerous couples and families just trying to enjoy their evening. you tried to pretend she wasn’t there, persistent on getting away from her as far as possible. but before you could turn around the next corner to try and get her off your back, she grabbed your foreman and pulled you back into her like she had done before.

“stop running, you’re acting like a child” she tried to keep her voice level “just come home so we can talk about this, please”

you didn’t even look at her, complying, as you let her lead you to the car and take you home.

when you arrived at your building, you both stood in complete silence as you entered the the apartment. you hung up your coat, took off your shoes, and sat on the couch waiting for her to start talking.

“so talk, kate. since that’s what you wanted to do.”

“YN, come on” she groaned, taking a seat on the opposite end of the couch “i don’t get why we need to have this conversation.”

“you don’t get it?” you were astonished, was she that fucking clueless “you don’t see what’s been going on?”

she just looked at you sadly, fingers massaging her temples in frustration.

“kate i know that things are difficult right now. i can’t even imagine what you’re feeling when you have to deal with all these things with basketball and try and handle everything else outside of that too. but you’ve changed, babe, and it feels like you’ve just stopped caring about me all together”

“you know that’s not true,” she said. “i love you so much, you know that”

“but do i, kate?” you shook your head “im sitting outside of that locker room, telling you all these things you’ve been doing that have seriously hurt my feelings…and you’re just not listening!”

“ok i’ll admit i’ve been distant! and im sorry for that, i really am, but i didn’t realize it was that big of a deal!” she defended “things have been so hectic and im struggling to keep everything together and-and then there’s stuff going on with my family and caitlin’s always asking me to-”

she began to ramble, telling you every possible thing that had been on her mind recently. you had no idea it was this bad.

“kate…” you leaned over, rubbing her shoulder to try and soothe her “i had no idea all of that was going on? why didn’t you just talk to me about it? you can always trust me with these things”

she leaned forward, letting her head fall into her hands, trying to keep her composure “because you’re always so good to me and i didn’t want to dump all of this on you and make you deal with it. i just don’t want my problems to become yours”

“and that’s very thoughtful, but i’m here to help. and even if i wasn’t…that doesn’t give you the right to just cut me off as a girlfriend completely, it’s so unlike you…and for you to get so upset with me when i just wanted to spend time with you after the game tonight? you’d never do that”

“i know, you’re right, i just..” she looked over to you, eyes bloodshot from holding in tears “i guess i thought that if i secluded myself and kept you out of it that it might be easier to deal with…but i was so fucking wrong. and i shouldn’t have pretended like this was normal, it’s not. i’m so sorry that i’ve been abandoning you and not even realizing”

“i’m…im not gonna sit here and say it’s ok, cause it’s not. but i know that this isn’t you. i know that you can fix yourself and trust me to help you sort out whatever’s bothering you. but i really need you to try. i miss the old you, i miss the good morning kisses and making me dinner and our movie nights, you know?”

she smiled, reminiscing “i miss it too, im gonna be better, i promise.”

“i know, and i love you ok?”

“i love you too, thank you for putting up with all my shit, i don’t deserve you”

you pulled her into you, reveling in her embrace for the first time in weeks, you could already feel things falling back into place.

it was going to take a long time for you to get back into your old dynamic with kate, but you understood that she was under a lot of pressure and she understood that you had struggles and needs just the same. so you promised to tackle it all, sticking together through thick and thin.

༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶

A/N: i’m very bad at writing angst so i apologize! if you guys request something and my outcome for it isn’t what you had wanted, feel free to message me and ill re write it for you, i want you guys to be completely satisfied with your requests!

on that same note, i’ve still got a few requests i’m finishing up and then i’ll open that back up again, thanks for understanding <3

have a lovely day!! :)

[oleanderscorner]

I offer you, the highest of my ideas

Yandere Twst X Overblot Yuu.

Vibes? IMMACULATE

Everyone’s like “oooh overblot twst so hooot” NO! I WANT THEM TO DO THAT. FOR ME. IN THE WORST WAYS POSSIBLE.

fuck the calculation n’ clever shit. I want them to run onto scene and go 👀👀

(Specifically if you wanna: Dorm leaders + Leech twins + Ace + Deuce.)

I think I can do this in more of a series—but I’ll do this in this more analysis-like format…let’s start with Vil because I think he would be the most fun.

Yandere!Vil x OB!Yuu

TW: manipulative behavior, obsessing, toxic and abusive themes, self harm—YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.

Vil Schoenheit

I think everyone can agree that Vil is often an incredibly misrepresented character—whether or not they know or believe their own interpretation to be completely correct. There’s a lot to his character that doesn’t get represented because it’s hard to represent all of him when he’s incredibly adaptable to his surroundings…

But before we get to him any more—let’s look at Yuu.

Yuu can’t OB in canon but without magic, but a personal theory I’ve had for a long time is that Yuu will gain magic somehow—because like everything else they’re now a part of this world, and while they don’t belong “currently” after saving so many people they’re bound to become part of the world they’re living in, and gain some level of magic or be someone part of the universe who has no magic—which is a little less likely considering where Yuu is placed within this universe.

Yuu’s UM is likely to be more similar to Ruggie’s in that they likely will have some level of control over people and surroundings, however, with the ghost theme of the dorm—it’s better to assume that Yuu’s UM may be to become invisible like a ghost to help in battle same way they always kind of had in game.

An OB would likely be quick as Yuu begins to miss home and just wants to disappear and have everyone forget them—have the world forget them—so that maybe they can go home as they no longer have any remnant of themselves in the universe. Homesickness is a real thing, and if we look at some of the manga Yuus we do know that there is families back home for Yuu to go to, and possibly friends too. It can hit hard after awhile, especially if we go by the year and we don’t know how time there works—which can host so many accidents where Yuu won’t see their family again and as much as Yuu would miss their friends here—home could hit a lot worse.

When not invisible, I’d imagine them covered in cloth similar to a sheet ghost and with ink between the folds and sheets, and nearly translucent—just for the fun of a design.

Now onto the actual OB!YuuxVil

(Might switch Yuu and you because Yuu is the reader, if I say they know that means reader/Yuu)

Vil is observant—he may send Rook or Epel to spy on you or make judgements of character—but he is observant of Yuu and their actions leading up to the overblot. He wanted to prepare for it himself—and hopefully actually stop it. In most instances he would—he knows how to take preventive measures—but…this time he didn’t.

As we know from chapter 5 and his vignettes, Vil is one to get back up again after every failed attempt—and is by far the most adaptable character when it comes to needing to work with a loss. He couldn’t prevent it? Fine—it’s not like anyone else was truly helping (they were), he’ll just have to take extreme measures instead.

He locks you up so you cannot be a danger to yourself and others—likely using something to get you to a secure location (his home if he could help it—it’s incredibly reinforced, his dad and he have crazy fans I’m sure) since Ramshackle would definitely be destroyed and Pomefiore has a ridiculous amount of glass to get you hurt. He normally isn’t the kidnapping type but this situation is incredibly dire, so he has to live up to that role.

Vil struggles with identity and selfishness—he is strict and wants to keep everyone in line, and knows how to battle each person who comes his way with tact and grace to keep people in line. However this is for the betterment of others more than for simple order. This is one of the things where he has to come off as the bad guy in order for people to be better versions of themselves and be better people. He is incredibly used to this role even if he hates it and loathes everything. It’s an identity he doesn’t want but it’s one he’s always going to be stuck with, making it hard to do truly selfish things unless it contributes to his image—something he cares way more about than himself.

All of this is to say that he is certain to try and manage your overblot—and to get you out of it—even if it means he has to be the bad guy and keep you away from things. Even if it means having to use magic spray you can’t hurt yourself and others. Even if it means afterwards you hate him.

Yet there will be times where he calls you beautiful, times where he tells you that you look lovely this way—times where he just praises you. Some of it he believes, but some of it is out of what little selfishness he can manage for himself to not completely be the villain in your eyes. It’s ever so slightly manipulative, but telling him that will only make things worse.

He tries to get you to eat so at least there’s things feeding this magical energy. Some of it is laced with potions to help do just that—because he is incredibly scared that stunting it will kill you or harm you. So he wants to just make sure you don’t completely use it all up.

Vil is determined—but if anything Yuu is the best at breaking his resolve.

Constant egging on about him keeping you here, about him using his magic against you—trying to hurt him for so long. Eventually it can get to be too much—but if Yuu mixes it in with any knowledge they knew of his previous obsession for them. How he wished so dearly to make them the best version of themselves and how he wishes to be a part of the life they had here. How he kept worried eyes on them and made sure more money was slipped into their account for food. Even the jealousy he had to hide constantly around those who also showed interest, and his own plans to outdo them that he constantly overthought and looked over. Or especially how Vil had failed to prevent this overblot? Well, that might just break it.

He’d use his own curses against him to make himself better. Give himself timeframes yo complete things or if there was a certain amount of insults or hits a day something would happen. Pain in his legs—turning old for a few days—a nasty illness—whatever worked to force him to get through to the real you.

Even if he overblot once—he can overblot again—and trust me, it’ll be far worse than it ever was before.

This is a quick take! I’d love to do a full in depth analysis of Vil and how I perceive him, and what I think so many people shove onto him that’s completely unfair of them to do—but I truly hope this does him justice. I’ll probably get to the other dorm leaders and maybe more soon depending on how I feel about an OB Yuu.

Thank you for reading!!

[sc0tters]

Over It | Jack Hughes

summary: just because you thought you were over Jack didn’t mean you were really telling the truth, right?

request: yes/no

warnings: swearing, mentions of drinking, allusions to sex but nothing explicit.

word count: 3.04k

authors note: low-key hated this, but we move on cause I’ve been waiting to write this request out (and Kei and Paige both said they didn’t hate this). Bit of a Barzal pairing in this too. Think the last time that I got into the 3k’s for words was with Crosby so haven’t gotten this far in a while.

You swore you were done.

All of the apologies that came in the form of expensive gifts, the fights when he would cancel on you last minute. How he would rather refer to you as a friend because anything else just simply didn’t fit into his vocabulary.

At last the way he had you writhing under his body all night long was no longer going to be enough to keep you in the shadows of his apartment when people who seemed to truly matter to him where around.

Tonight was the night you swore you were out of Jack Hughes’ life once and for all.

A little over twelve months ago was when it all started between you two. Dawson had convinced you to come and visit him during your fall break as you were finally not doing anything during the break.

You had wanted to transfer from the University of San Diego to NYU and he encouraged you to do finally make the jump.

Jack met you after a game as you were wrapping your hands around Dawson pulling the older boy into a hug as you wanted nothing more than to congratulate the boy for assisting the game winning goal.

He watched how your smile lit up the room and he knew he was down bad “Jack meet y/n!” Dawson called out to his teammate as he motioned to him to come over to them.

That started weeks of staying up till two in the morning on the phone where most nights you two more times than not fell asleep on those calls.

Once you finally made the move to the big apple it seemed that Hughes boy spent every other weekend that the boys played at home in your apartment.

Activities ranged from dinners at expensive restaurants to meeting your classmates and friends but the nights always ended with you two in your bed until the sun came up when he’d leave to head back to Jersey before anyone realised that he had been gone.

And that was fine, you were ready to accept that it was the life you two were meant to live. Sure it was going to be hard but you thought that you loved him, and for that you were ready to have him in whatever way that Jack desired to give himself to you in.

Or at least until he broke your biggest rule, when you were someone’s fuck buddy you didn’t share.

Jack had been seen at a party with this cute little blonde girl and you truly lost it.

The boy had his hand wrapped around her waist as her lips were against his neck “she’s just a friend y/n!” Jack groaned as he watched you shove the clothes you had brought with you into a bag.

Your eyes were wet with tears “friends my ass!” You scoffed shaking your head “you canceled on me that night because your brother was in town!” That’s honestly why you were hurt most about.

Being left in Jack’s apartment all alone as you waited on his arrival after his late cancellation.

Originally you thought you were being stupid for thinking that a flowery perfume invaded your nostrils last night as he crept into bed but when you opened up Twitter you knew that you were right.

And now to make it all worse he was attempting to lie to you about it “I didn’t want you to overreact!” The hockey player ran his fingers through his hair.

You rolled your eyes so hard that they probably could have rolled back into your head as all you saw was red “you think this is me overreacting?” You laughed as you shook your head.

His fingers reached out to yours but you moved away just too quick “next time you want to go get your dick wet go find her.” You spat sending him a glare.

Jack’s assumption that this was going to pass over was quickly waning “because I am officially done with whatever this is.” And with that you pulled your duffle bag off of his bed before you walked out of his room.

Leaving Jack alone with his thoughts and the mere admiration of your exit as he couldn’t find the way to make his feet move towards as his mouth remained shut.

So there the hockey player stood, mute and trapped.

Weeks had gone by of radio silence between you both as a result of it and after days of trying your friends had managed to drag you along to a bar where they hoped that your sorrows would wane.

Despite your protests you were still dragged into the club where the music blared over the loud speakers “I think we have found your new man y/n!” Sofia yelled as she hoped that her words would be heard.

Your eyes followed hers as you found the smile of a guy that was clearly a few years older than you both, and he was definitely looking at you.

Before either of your friends gave you the option to say no they pushed you in the direction of the boy “you want a drink?” He asked as he sent you a grin.

He was pretty as you nodded “rum and coke thanks!” You looked at the bar tender who nodded.

The two of you tried to grab your cards but the boy was quicker “I like to know the name of a guy who buys my drinks usually.” You pointed out watching him tap his card on the scan reader “I’m Mat.” He held his hand out to you as he shook your head “y/n.”

You spent the next few hours with him learning about how he lived in New York and was in the bar celebrating a big win before some break for the team.

He was a fucking hockey player.

It was an amusing sight, you knew his face was familiar and you would have never put it down to seeing him on the other side of the ice “I hope I’m not getting the wrong impression but are you seeing someone?” Mat had to admit that you were the prettiest girl he had seen in a while and he wasn’t going to let you go without a fight.

The man you had tried so hard to forget about and were successful in doing so quickly came back into your mind. Mat could see how your face dropped and he immediately took that as an answer deciding to move away from you “wait!” Your eyes screwed shut as you thought about it.

Mat scanned your face waiting to hear what you were going to say “there isn’t anyone important.” Now that wasn’t entirely false, Jack was important but you were trying to get to the point where he was no longer important to you.

It made the boy smile “good.” He nodded sipping his beer as he tried to mask the way his cheeks turned pink.

That was the ultimate turning point. You spent most weekends with the Canadian from that point on, you got to know him for who he was away from hockey and away from the fame.

The luxury was something you never experienced with Jack as it took a whole three months before Mat even tried to kiss you.

During his usual walk back to your apartment building the air was crisp as summer changed to autumn.

His hand ran against your back as Mat listened to you talk about the course you were doing “what?” You furrowed your eyebrows watching him smile at you.

Mat moved his hand into his pocket “you just look really fucking gorgeous tonight.” His confession had your eyes going wide “just tonight?” You cocked your eyebrows as you playfully crossed your arms.

The hockey player laughed as he pushed his fingers through his hair “you know I think you’re beautiful all the time.” Mat blurted out before his eyes went wide.

You let his nerves ease as you stepped closer to him “I think you should act on it then.” Your voice was soft as you pushed yourself onto your tippy toes “why don’t you do it yourself?” Mat shot back making you grin.

His lips pressed against yours making you weak at the knees. It filled your heart with so much warmth and joy feeling his love with every single touch.

Somehow even after that, with all the genuine gestures of love that showed you just how much you meant to him it wasn’t enough.

Mat had you sat wherever you wanted during games. The prime seat to watch his goals that were always dedicated to you.

Whilst it made you feel like the only girl in the world as he pointed up in the crowd you couldn’t help thinking about him.

Jack hadn’t spoken to you still as he didn’t think you were truly serious about what was going on with Mat. Dawson hadn’t ever told you about his teammates everlasting questions surrounding you.

At the beginning it was about your life and how you were but over the past month the topic changed to surround anything that had to do with you and Mat, how you were? If you were dating? Hell, how the hell did you know him?

Before you Jack didn’t think that being jealous was an emotion that he could ever feel. But here he was.

His fists clenched as they stepped onto the ice at the UBS arena. It didn’t take the Hughes boy long to lock eyes with Mat, he had been staring up at you as you grinned down at the boy.

The topic of you two was still not something that really had a title, everyone thought you two were sleeping together but they were waiting for you to admit it eventually.

That was the main contrast between how Mat and Jack were. The older boy was happy having you around, pulling you close when you were out but Jack always seemed to feel differently.

He never had you around him, preferring looking like you were there as friends.

For the duration of the game you avoided Jack’s gaze as much as you could only ever letting it lock when your mind wandered back to what life was like with him.

You longed for the way he made your body feel on fire, the oxygen in your lungs was no longer want you needed to survive when you were with him. Instead it was the feeling of Jack’s lips against your skin.

Sure you felt guilty as you thought about him between your legs instead of your vibrator.

The name that slipped from your lips as your body shook against the silk sheet that lay on your bed belonged to him.

But you truly couldn’t seem to escape it no matter how hard you tried.

Maybe you would have felt some comfort if you knew that Jack felt the same way, he called the last girl he slept with by your name rather than her own.

And that was what drove the American to play like he did. The idea of focusing on attacking Mat than defending the puck seemed all to preferred to by him.

You were left at the edge of your seat awaiting every moment of calmness as you couldn’t stand the idea of watching them against each other, not when there was a small part of you that wanted Jack to win.

So that was the driving factor that pushed you to leave the game early as you avoided the locker room.

Still enjoying the comfort of Mats jersey with a pair of shorts that you had changed into when the doorbell rang.

Truly you didn’t think anything of it when you walked to your door, Mat was the man you assumed would be there, it was where he always came after a game.

But this time someone else was there “Jack?” Your jaw went slack as your eyes went wide.

The boy smirked running his hand over his jaw “hey princess.” His words still had the same effect on you as you swallowed your pride opening the door just that bit further as you worried that someone would see him “hate seeing you in that colour.” Jack confessed shaking his head as he sat on your couch.

His legs spread giving you the perfect view of the package that his suit bottoms held.

Air was sucked from your lungs as you tugged at the sleeves of the jersey “w-what are you doing here?” You asked trying to focus on your words as your feet brought you to his side.

Jack felt his ego grow as your eyes took in his new hair cut, a feature of his you would once would have killed him for messing with.

You had finished class early so you were enjoying your time in Jack’s apartment that you let yourself into whilst you waited for him to finish the training session “hi princess.” Jack smiled locking eyes with the boy as he saw the hoodie you were wearing.

It was one of his from his time with the national team “hey Jacky.” You spun around on his barstool to see the sweaty boy “was someone excited to see me?” You teased smiling as he placed his hands on the counter behind you on either side locking you into your seat “always baby.” The hockey player let his tongue run over his lip as he watched you scrunch your nose up.

As hot as he was all sweaty he also stank like an athlete “you smell.” You giggled as he pouted “come take a shower with me then?” Jack proposed hovering his lips over yours.

Your thighs tensed as he drove his hands over the shorts you wore “I don’t wanna get all wet.” You complained barely getting your words out “think if I checked the pretty little panties that you’re wearing they’d be soaked.” His voice sent shivers down your spine.

In an instant your fingers locked onto his hair as his lips nipped at your neck “so you coming baby?” Jack rephrased his question pulling away to take in the blush on your face that had formed “yep.”

In all honesty you wondered how it would he having his short hair as he pleasured you “came to see what you and Barzy were doing.” His nickname for Mat made you want to throw up “think you should go,” you mumbled looking at the ground as you heard the cushion shift beneath the boy.

Jack took a few small steps to you before he hooked his fingers under your jaw “give me one good reason why I should leave and I will.” His words made you chew at your lip “he should be here any second.” You confessed looking to the door when you heard a loud noise.

It made the boy laugh “trust me he isn’t coming.” Jack shook his head as he had taken the courtesy to tell Mat about you and him during the game.

That was why Mat threw a punch, but of course you didn’t know that yet.

You stood there in silence for a bit “I like him Jack.” In that moment you truly could have cried, your heart pounded nearly out of your chest wanting to make you sick.

In a way you could have been high in altitude with the way your head felt light “but does he make you feel like I do?” Jack wasn’t an idiot, you had something missing.

As much as you wanted Mat to be the missing puzzle piece of your life, you knew he wasn’t even from your box.

A disappointed cry left your lips as you nodded “no Jack!” Your eyes watered ad you knew it was the truth.

Those nights you spent so fucked out that a coherent thought couldn’t form in your head, where Jack had to change his sheets because you two had gotten so sweaty after so many rounds that his sheets were wet. The ones where your throat would grow raw from screaming his name as you cried out your pleads to have him let you come.

Only one man could make you feel like that, and he was stood right in front of you.

Jack wrapped his arms around you as he gave your body a squeeze before he brought his hands up to cup your cheeks “let me make you feel good tonight baby.” He mumbled driving your body back to hit a wall behind you.

It pushed the air out of your lips “j-jack,” you whimpered feeling his hands press against your sides pushing up your jersey “wanna hear you say it.” Jack watched your eyes stare up at his with curiosity and hope.

As your brain told you to push him away and run your heart seemed to control your words in that moment “I want you Jack.” You blurted out making his smirk grow larger.

His tongue clicked “well let’s get you out of this then baby.” The hockey player didn’t like the idea of you in another man’s jersey as it was clear that it was a reminder of whose presence graced the walls of your apartment for so long.

When the white jersey hit the floor it seemed to take your worries with it.

Maybe you shouldn’t have felt so bad about wanting Jack. Maybe you should have let him stay, let this stay.

When his lips pressed against your stomach driving closer to where you wanted him it felt like the gates to heaven opened.

His eyes looked at you with so much intention and desire, the way you had been waiting for him to see you.

So whilst Mat sat in his car waiting to hear what you wanted from Dairy Queen totally oblivious to the activities going on in your apartment as your phone vibrated on the coffee table. You never noticed it.

But even if you did you were a little bit busy focusing on the man who dropped to his knees hooking his fingers in the waistband of your shorts.

“Please Jack.”

So maybe you weren’t over him just yet.

[rjalker]

>:(

if anyone tell you pap smears don't hurt they're a gods damned liar

next time I'm going to ask them to just give me fucking laughing gas or something.

Edit two days later:

For the fucking record to ward off jackass, this post is being made by a nonbinary trans person. My pronouns are it/its. Any TERFs or other transmisics who touch this post will be fucking vaporized.

For a damn preface, for those unaware, a pap smear is a procedure done on people with vaginas to test for cervical cancer or other health problems. It involves sticking a medical device into the vagina and using it to widen the walls of the vagina so the doctor can stick a tiny brush into the cervix to collect cells for testing.

And if you try to look up whether or not this procedure can hurt, every where you look will tell you it doesn’t.

And I'm still fucking infuriated by this. Because it’s a fucking lie. Everywhere I looked beforehand said it wouldn't hurt, I might just feel some pressure. Every single fucking website and blog post and video said "It won't hurt! It doesn't hurt!"

Even now when I am specifically trying to find other people talking about how it hurts, 99% of the results are saying it doesn't hurt, and if it does, it's just because you're nervous and anxious and causing yourself problems.

Except every where I fucking looked told me it wouldn't hurt. The doctor said it wouldn't hurt. My fucking mom said it wouldn't hurt.

I was not tense. I was not anxious. I was told it wouldn't hurt and I believed all the people who'd said so.

And then it felt like having a knife shoved inside my body.

And I was told to just do some fucking breathing exorcises and relax.

Even though I'd been fucking relaxed until it started hurting, because everyone fucking old me it was painless, just mildly uncomfortable.

And I am not talking about pain like "a little pinch", I mean fucking pain like being stabbed with a needle or having a knife twisted inside you. And it just got worse the longer it went on. They had to fucking stop early and might not have even been able to collect the fucking cells they were supposed to be testing.

And when this was finally over the doctor told me that the only reason it hurt was because my hymen was intact (So what about all the fucking shit going around for years about how that breaks for everyone in fucking gym class???? More fucking lies!!), as though that had anything to do with the pain inside.

And now every fucking thing I try to look up for reasons why it can hurt is literally just fucking repeating the same shit about how it doesn’t hurt, and if it does, it’s only because you were nervous and anxious and embarassed and all the fucking things I WASN’T. BECAUSE I WAS TOLD IT WOULDN’T HURT.

Every where I fucking look, I’m told that these things don’t hurt, and it’s just anxiety, and blah fuckity blah.

For fuck’s sake, this is real fucking medical gaslighting going on on a fucking absurd level.

These fucking websites and videos and blog posts and articles may as well just fucking call my hysterical at this point for all they fucking give a shit about people who are hurt by this procedure.

Everyone’s too fucking busy insisting that it doesn’t hurt and you have to get one and if you avoid getting one then you’re a bad person and you’re going to get cancer and die.

I’ve literally found exactly one (1) article talking about how it does hurt for some people, but that this gets constantly brushed under the rug and shouted down, and how this is a fucking problem. One fucking short article out of almost a hundred that I checked.

If you are so hellbent on getting people to get pap smears that you will literally fucking lie about the fact that not only can it hurt, it can hurt extremely, then you are not fucking helping anyone! If no one’s allowed to fucking talk about how painful this procedure is, no one can actually fucking give informed consent, because all of society is apparently too damn busy lying and saying it doesn’t hurt!!!!!!

This is blatant fucking medical misogyny and medical gaslighting everywhere you look and I’d have to be fucking knocked unconcious or given fucking laughing gas before I ever agree to do that again.

There’s even a fucking tiktok someone put on youtube where the original person was talking about offering anesthesia for pap smears, and then a fucking gynecologist comes in to say that’s stupid and useless and absurd and pretends that the only reason it can hurt is because people aren’t relaxed enough.

This is literal fucking society-wide misogynistic lying and gaslighting and it is pure fucking evil.

So pro fucking tip, for people who need to get pap smears: It can in fact hurt. Do not fucking let anyone tell you that you’re imagining it or you’re immature or you’re causing it yourself by being anxious. Do not fucking let them gaslight you and victim blame.

Pap smears can hurt, a lot, and anyone who tells you they don’t or can’t is just straight up fucking lying to your face.

So does this fucking mean I have endometriosis? Vaginismus? Some other fucking horrible thing I haven't heard of yet??? I don't fucking know! And it's gonna take three weeks to fucking find out the test results, assuming they even got to collect any of the gods damned cells in the first place!

Either fucking way, the fact that no one is allowed to talk about how this procedure can be excruciatingly painful because everyone else is just shouting at the top of their lungs that it doesn't hurt and you need to be a Big Girl™ and stop being embarrassed and go get one is fucking evil and I am fucking enraged.

(Edit again for the anon: Yes, you can reblog this, I am not embarrassed, more people need to talk about this so people can at least have some fucking warning. Feel free to copy and paste to other sites too.)

[iovetecchou]

Oblivious.

Part 3.

Oblivious Masterlist!

Pairings… Tecchou Suehiro x Reader

Contains… smut. shy!tecchou, pervert!reader, grinding, dry(?)humping, mutual masturbation, making out, mutual feelings, fluff towards the end. tecchou is a gentleman.

AFAB Reader, she/they pronouns used.

3,645 words.

whew this one is super long, but i didn’t want to cut it into two parts, i feel like this needed to be one full chapter! so here it is! i hope you all enjoy! (:

You were so nervous the whole car ride to your place. Tecchou was in his own little world, looking outside your passenger side window, making a mental note of every red car you had passed. Fuck this was finally happening. You were finally going to have Tecchou all to yourself and in the privacy of your apartment. You were on cloud nine. All these months of pining over him felt worth it at this moment. "We're here!”

You announced, getting out of your car and meeting Tecchou on the other side. “Come on, follow me! I'll show you up to my place.” Tecchou only nodded, stepping out of your car and following you up to your apartment, completely oblivious to the way you kept glancing back at him, gaze lingering from time to time. Once you both entered your apartment, your nerves seemed to ease up a bit. “Come here Tecchou, I'll get you set up with the shower, and once you get out we can have some coffee and soy sauce, sound good?” You smiled up at him, hands clasped behind your back as you swiftly turned, and walked him over to the bathroom. Turning the faucet on and setting a towel out on the countertop for him.

Before you were able to exit the bathroom, Tecchou stopped you. Grabbing your forearm with his big, strong hand. He had a firm grasp on you, it didn’t hurt but it felt comforting. Safe. “Wait, y/n, I just wanted to thank you. You’re always so kind to me and I’m grateful. Especially now, letting me bathe here, going out of your way to get me a change of clothes and a nice cup of coffee. Truly, thank you y/n.” His eyes are gleaming as he gives you the cutest smile, god your heart is exploding in your chest, he’s too cute for his own good. You flush instantly stammering out “O-of course Tecchou! You always help me at work and make sure I don’t die and all that so, I guess were even!” You laugh nervously and he nods his head once more. “I should get going, I'll leave you to your shower Tecchou! Meet me in the living room when you’re done, okay?” You offer him one last smile before the grip he had on your forearm loosens and he grins back at you in return, gently closing the door to handle his business. You're a blushing mess, walking over to your kitchen as though you’re floating. How is this happening, you still don't know. As you make the coffee for Tecchou, you begin to ponder about how you’ll even confess to him. "Hey, I’ve loved you since the first time I saw you go out with me!” No, that sounded creepy, maybe more like “Tecchou I’ve been meaning to tell you this but I love you. Marry me.” NO, no. That’s even worse. You thought about it a bit longer until you finally came up with something that didn’t make you sound completely crazy, maybe it was too soon for love, so let's dial it back.

As Tecchou let the water run down his back and through his hair, he reflected on all the times you offered him to come over. Or to get drinks. You always had this sad look on your face when he declined, or invited the others. Why was that? Tecchou thought. Did you not like the others? Were you mad he couldn’t come over? No, that wasn’t like you. You’re very understanding. And you, Tachihara, and Teruko are always laughing with one another, and Jouno is well… Jouno. So you hating them can’t be the case either. Then, it clicked for him. Like a fucking wave crashing over the two brain cells in his head. Oh, oh. You liked him, didn’t you? This is what Jouno was saying when he muttered under his breath about how “Oblivious” he was. Y/n has feelings for me. That's why their face always gets red when they’re around me. And that's always why they ask to be partnered up with me on missions. And that's also why they look me up and down during muscle training with that unreadable look in their eyes while biting their lip- oh. You really liked him. And now he was suddenly fully aware. He kept repaying your interactions over and over in his head. Cheeks starting to warm up and not just because of the hot water. Maybe… he felt the same way. I mean, you would bring him his favorite food combinations some morning saying you “Had leftovers!” and “Didn’t want them to go to waste!” He sees now that was a lie. An excuse for you to bring him lunch without making things weird between the two of you. Or how you would grab onto his arm when you got scared on missions always looking up at him with so much trust in your eyes. God, you’re so cute why is he just noticing this now? In your shower of all places. He also recalls this one instance when you were muscle training together, sparring. He ended up sweeping your legs with his own, you landed on your back with a thud and he dropped down in front of you with his knee placed between your thighs, pressing his forearm to your neck before saying “And just like that, you would be dead. You have to be more careful, y/n.”

You blushed instantly but it was hard to tell if it was from the training or the way Tecchou’s shirtless, sweaty body was pressed up against yours. With his knee inching ever so closely to your core with each passing breath. He just stared at you, waiting for a response, as if that would even be possible with his forearm pressed to your neck. Shifting upwards a bit, his knee came in contact with your clothed cunt and you couldn’t help the needy whine that slipped past your lips. Tecchou tilted his head like a confused puppy before asking “Uh, y/n? You okay? Are you hurt…?” You quickly wiggled your way free from his grasp, he loosened up his hold on you tremendously after assuming you had been injured so it made it easier for you to escape. You scurried across the room, shifting awkwardly before excusing yourself with, “O-oh! No i-i'm perfectly okay! J-just need to use the restroom! I-i’ll be right back!” And just like that you were gone. At this time, he thought nothing of it. Just assumed you really need to pee, or something, that's why you were all squirmy. But now, now. He realizes what exactly happened that made you react like that. Just a simple movement of his had you making such lewd sounds? The memory of your sultry whine played over and over in his mind. Tecchou flushed deeper, starting to grow hard. Oh no, this isn’t good. He quickly turned the shower cold, hoping it would alleviate some of the heat he was feeling. He needs to calm down... He’s in your home, your shower, oh my god. The reality of the situation is fully dawning on him now. You’re both alone. In your apartment. And he’s already naked. Okay, calm down Tecchou. Calm down. You don’t want to make y/n uncomfortable? Do you? No. Didn’t think so. Just act normal. He reasoned with himself, trying to get a grip on himself. As he started to relax seemingly half-hard now, Tecchou turned the water off and stepped out of the shower. Only to be hit with the next obstacle immediately. You forgot to bring him a change of clothes. Leaving him with only a towel. Shit.

As you were pouring both you and Tecchou a cup, you heard the bathroom door click open. You smiled to yourself expectantly. You were so excited and quite nervous to finally get these feelings off of your chest. “Tecchou? Perfect timing! I was just pouring you a cup of coffee! Come over here!” Your voice echoed throughout your apartment. Tecchou stood behind the door nervously, he pondered calling you over or shouting from the bathroom door about how you forgot to bring him a change of clothes. But in the end, for lack of better judgment, he stepped out of the bathroom and took quick shaky strides over to your living room. You were just about to sit down on the couch when your eyes locked with Tecchou's, scanning him over and- oh fuck. He’s naked. Like still dripping wet from his shower naked, and he only has a towel loosely wrapped around his waist. Oh, you were not expecting things to escalate this quickly. “Um, y/n. You forgot to bring me over a change of clothing… That's why I’m… naked.” Tecchou averts his gaze from you. Well, this is unusual, you think to yourself. Tecchou is always bold, and confident and never acts this… Shy? He’s always half naked around HQ when he’s muscle training in places he shouldn't be, so why now, why is he acting so timid? Your face is ablaze by now, and you can’t stop your wandering eyes, the soft pitter patter of the water dripping down from Tecchou's hair and onto your hardwood floors is all that echos throughout your mind as you trail your gaze further down. The towel is practically hanging on by a miracle, his v line, and gorgeous toned torso glistening from just exiting the shower and- holy fuck. He’s hard. Like, really hard. You can sort of make out the shape of his dick through the thin white towel and you’re losing your fucking mind. You’ve thought about this for so long imagining how it would look, what it would feel like insid- “Uh, y/n? Did you hear what I said...?” His gaze is back on you now and he finally understands what that unreadable look you would give him all those times during muscle training… lunch.. and at meetings were and what it was right now… lust.

Tecchou felt like he was on fire. Flushed now from the tips of his ears down to his chest. You were far gone. You couldn’t focus on his words. Not like this. All of your fantasies were playing out right in front of you. There is no way you’re about to let this opportunity pass you up like this. So, you do what any reasonable person would do. You take quick steps towards Tecchou and hook your arms around his neck. Placing your hands on both his cheeks and pulling him down closer to your face because he’s just too damn tall. Tecchou's eyes widened, surprised by your bold actions, “Y/n what are you—“. But before he can even get his sentence out, you kiss him. Pulling his face further into your own with the grip you had on his face, Tecchou is frozen for a few seconds, taking in your features from this distance before his eyelids flutter shut and he begins to push back against you. Oh my god. He’s kissing you back. He didn’t pull away or get angry. He’s actually into this! This gives you a little bit more confidence to continue. Moving your hands from his face up to his hair, grazing his scalp lightly with your fingernails before giving his strands a slight tug. Tecchou gasps at this, giving you an opening to slip your tongue through his parted lips. Exploring his mouth with your own. Tecchou lets out this deep groan and you have to squeeze your legs together to relieve the ache his groans are causing. Fuck, his sounds are so hot. You have to hear more. Tecchou finally brings his hands up to your waist, gently gripping your sides while your tongue explores his mouth further. Shit, He can’t control himself, he’s getting stiffer with each passing second, and the rising of his cock is starting to make the towel slip. Oh no, this isn’t good. Tecchou thinks to himself. You are too lost in making out with Tecchou to realize but you pull him in impossibly closer, your chests flush against one another. And that's when you feel it poking against your tummy. You pull away, letting Tecchou catch his breath, as you look down, and oh my fucking god. The towel has now found comfort on your living room floor. Leaving Tecchou completely bare in front of you. Fuck, his cock is so pretty. He’s decently thick but holy shit his length is making you drool. He has a pretty pink tip adorning his pale cock, and it curves slightly upwards, resting against his torso now. Fuck he’s so perfect. Everything about him is so beautiful. Better than what you had imagined. You think to yourself. Tecchou is so fucking embarrassed at this point. He’s once again averting his gaze and is shifting uncomfortably where he stands. It's so unusual seeing him like this but you fucking love it. It's driving you mad. You want to ruin him.

You quickly snap out of your thoughts as you grab ahold of Tecchou's shoulders and turn him around so his back is now facing your sofa. You give him a gentle nudge and he goes tumbling back onto your couch with a soft thud. You waste no time climbing into his lap. Straddling his gorgeous, thick thighs and continuing your assault on his mouth. Fuck you can feel yourself dripping down your thighs at this point. Once again mentally scolding yourself for wearing your skirt uniform, because it makes it so difficult to hide your arousal. You experimentally roll your hips forward, making contact with the underside of his cock that's pressed up against his midsection. He pulls away from your mouth with a breathy whine. Oh. You like that sound. You want more. Continuing to rock your hips forward lifting them up a bit so you can rub the head of his aching dick against your clothed pussy. He can feel your wetness through your panties and this causes him to let out a deep moan. He’s panting now, the slight friction is making his thighs shake and he’s gripping your hips hard to stabilize himself. You begin kissing up the length of his neck, softly nibbling in-between kisses. God, he makes you lose control. You can’t help yourself when it comes to Tecchou. He's yours. And only yours. You need to feel more of him you need t- ‘’W-wait y/n, wait. Stop.” Tecchou holds your hips firmly down against the tops of his thighs, pulling you away from his length in the process. Your heart sinks. Oh no, you’ve made him uncomfortable. Pushed it too far. God, you’re so stupid! He probably hates you now. There's that look again. Tecchou thinks to himself. Your small pout and sad eyes pull at his heartstrings. “Y/n… I like you. I don’t want to rush into... This so soon. As much as I’m enjoying this, and believe me, I am. I want to take things slow with you if that's okay…” He trails off, your brain short-circuiting the second he said “I like you.” This was definitely some twisted wet dream, right? Tecchou's words snapped you back into reality, “Y/n did you hear me?” Your eyes meet his and you can see the warmth swimming in his irises, this wasn’t a dream. It's really happening.

“Y-yes I heard you Tecchou, and I completely understand. I don’t want to make you uncomfortable in any way…” You trail off finding one of his hands that was still placed on your hip, taking it in your own and holding it tenderly before you continue. “Tecchou, I’ve wanted to tell you this ever since we first met but, I have feelings for you. I’ve always liked you, I was just too scared to be forward with you… until now.” You offer him a small smile before dropping your gaze down to your interlocked hands, bringing your empty hand over to your intertwined ones, toying with each of his digits to distract yourself from how much you were shaking. It felt... weird to finally get all of this off your chest. You felt incredibly vulnerable. Tecchou just smiled at you. Finding you in his lap toying with his fingers to be endearing in this very moment. He takes his free hand up to your chin and tilts it upward. Forcing you to look at him directly. Your eyes catch sight of his soft smile, one you’ve never seen adorn his features until now. It makes you feel less uneasy. And you smile right back at him. Trying to radiate that same warmth you felt from his own smile. ��How about we watch a movie, for now, y/n?” He looks down at his lap, still, incredibly hard, he flushes deeply once more. “But first, I-if you would just excuse me for a few minutes. I have some… business to take care of in the bathroom.” You feel your cunt pulse, reading between the lines of what he just said. Fuck he’s going to jerk off in your bathroom. Isn’t he? You bite your lip before climbing off his lap carefully. Taking one last look at his pretty cock, making a mental note for future purposes. “R-right of course! I'll grab you that change of clothes now.” You awkwardly laugh before making quick strides to your bedroom, fetching him an oversized shirt that you’re sure will fit perfectly on his frame and a pair of boxers you often would wear yourself to sleep. You couldn’t stop thinking about what just played out on your living room couch. Still pinching yourself to make sure this was in fact real life.

Tecchou quickly shoots up from your couch, making his way to the bathroom before shutting the door softly once more. His ears are ringing and his heart pounding. He looks down at his own cock and takes hold of the base, letting out a deep groan rumbling from within his chest. Fuck. You do like him, and you just confessed to him. And he confessed to you, even if he was a little late to catch up to his own feelings. He made quick strokes over his throbbing cock, leaking so much pre as he replayed the events of what just happened on your couch. Moaning out to himself as he continued to pump his dick. Lost in the way you felt pressed against him, the feeling of your wet panties dragging along the head of his cock. Fuck. He brings his free hand up to his mouth, biting it to suppress his breathless moans. Hoping you can’t hear him right now. But you heard, everything. You only intended to place the change of clothes right outside the bathroom door for him to retrieve once he was done, “taking care of business” and leave. But your feet felt like they were stuck in cement. You couldn’t move. The sounds coming from the bathroom were too fucking good. You could hear his muffled moans and the faint pat pat pat of his slicked up hand against his cock. Fuck you were so far gone. You didn’t even notice your hand slipping down under your skirt and into your panties, leaning against the wall next to your bathroom door. You began moving your free hand up to your mouth. Not daring to let anything slip past. There's no way you could forgive yourself if Tecchou heard you touching yourself to his moans. You’re so fucking filthy. But you can’t help yourself. You never can, when it comes to Tecchou.

Gathering the slick that was pooling in between your legs from as early as this afternoon, you begin moving your hand upwards. Rubbing your clit at the same pace you assume Tecchou is going at, based on the sounds echoing throughout your bathroom walls. Fuck, this is so dirty but you're too far gone. Tecchou is so lost in his own pleasure, his moans are picking up a few octaves and you can tell he's going to cum soon. You weren’t too far behind, being so worked up all day and having your fantasies become reality right in front of your very eyes had you nearly toppling over the edge the second you granted yourself the slightest bit of friction. You're biting your hand now. Rubbing quick circles over your bud, shit you’re gonna cum, but not until Tecchou tips over the edge first. You needed to hear him fall apart. His strokes are becoming sloppy from the other side of your bathroom door, and he’s whimpering now, chest rising and falling with each passing stroke. All he can see is your cute face in his mind as you confessed to him, your eyes that always held so much trust for him. Fuck that's all it took for him to lose it, cumming with one final flick of his wrist, “S-shit y/n-!” His moans slip past his hand before he can stop it, and you're cumming, hard from the other side of the door. The sound of him moaning your name had you reeling, biting your hand so hard to stay quiet, you’re sure you’ve left teeth marks behind.

You don’t give yourself a second to recover from your orgasm, quickly scurrying back to your room to change out of your soaked panties and work uniform finally. Tecchou is catching his breath, walking over to the sink to wash away his filth coating his hands, god you’re beginning to corrupt his mind. But he doesn’t seem to care, embracing all of it. Tecchou opens the bathroom door and notes the clothes left outside the door. He glances left and then right to see if you’re nearby, hoping you only just left these here and didn’t catch the obscenities that were leaving his mouth only moments ago. He changes quickly before exiting the bathroom for the final time that night. You’re now on the couch adorning the cutest matching pj set with a blanket draped comfortably over your lap. You look up at him, patting the open spot next to you. “So... wanna watch A Bugs Life?” You ask, giving him a coy smile.

God, you are out for his own heart. He might just fall in love with you and fast.

okay i know what you guys are probably thinking- no i didn’t forget about jouno! don’t worry, i have a few ideas of where i want this story to go! but feel free to leave any comments or suggestions!

Taglist: @coco-goat-milk @madelynwolff @tecchoufr @saharei

[evilyn-is-gay]

“Evelyn Eclipse is getting a redemption arc! Why do you still hate him??”

BECAUSE HES A BITCH???? HUH???

Ok ok im overexaggerating. I don’t hate this version of Eclipse (he’s actually a lot like me from what I’ve heard) but I DO hate Eclipse in general! Him now is alright since he’s not really the same guy but OHHOHOHOHO I HATEEEE HIM.

“He had trauma tho” YES. THAT IS COMPLETELY VALID. BUT JUST BECAUSE YIU HAVE PROBLEMS DOESNT MEAN YOU HAVE A FREE CARD TO TREAT PEOPLE LIKE TRASH.

New Eclipse is a lot better, don’t get me wrong! I’m happy he’s getting better and healing since the other versions never got to!

BUT. I HATE HOW PEOPLE JUST IGNORE HOW BAD OG ECLIPSE WAS???? Like,,, just because they have a cause as to how they act doesn’t mean that the individual has all of the terrible stuff they did forgiven??? Hello??

This also goes to Nexus! Yes, people aren’t treating him fairly and he is/was mentally ill but that doesn’t give him the right to harm others?? He’s even aware of this fact and digs himself deeper??? I’ve been through severe grief and depression and have seen others go through similar experiences. Personally, I have never seen nor experienced someone/myself become as much of a terrible person as Nexus just because of trauma. Did I become a lot worse and was terrible to others? Yes! That was uncontrollable due to stress and mental instability! And I thought I was completely normal and fine! NEXUS KNOWS WHAT HES DOING IS BAD. HE DOESNT CARE. HE WANTS TO HURT OTHERS.

And oh do NOT make me go on a rant about Old Moon cuz I FUCKING HATED HIM BEFORE HE CAME BACK.

If you’d like to argue please keep it civil.

Also I’ve been here for longer than the majority of you,,,, I know what I’m talking about. So don’t say “well it’s not like you were there” because I was actually!!!!

Sorry Chat I am weirdly riled up I needed to yap.

[crusty-chronicles]

Hey I loved your kite smut posts, it’s doing things to me mentally, I’ve been reading it everyday for a week now I’m really down bad for this 2d man.

Btw can you please make part 3 (pretty please)

An: Y'all don't realize how down bad I am for this man already. I've got a threesome with him and Ging on the way, another future Chimera Ant Kite (like an Au, just not his canonical little girl form) and now this one. 😭😭😭 I've become a whore.

Okay here we go

Love Me Like I'm Your Last (Part 3)

SCREAMING BC HE'S SO FUCKING PRETTY

SMUT So Minors DNI

Warnings: Fem bodied reader, Sexting, hair pulling, creampie, scratching, biting, unprotected sex, mentions of pregnancy(might be breeding kink), long distance relationship, fluff at the end because I'm soft for this man.

Synopsis: You miss your partner and after finally being able to meet with each other for the first time in months, you two decide to indugle in yourselves for a little while. Part 1, Part 2

-------------------------

You knew this relationship would be difficult. Especially now that the both of you had split up to travel with your respective parties. Yes you had each other's numbers, but it wasn't face to face.

You couldn't touch him, couldn't bask in his presence. And time had been cut too short last time. You had barely gotten properly dressed by the time the door swung open and in came everyone.

It was only a few days after that when you were once again dragged off to start a new adventure with your boys.

Kite called you as often as he could, which wasn't much considering the continent he was surveying had terrible service.

You'd tried your best to answer each and every one of them, but it was so damn hard to do much when you were being chased down by whatever creature Gon and Killua decided to piss off.

Not to mention fending off that creepy clown.

You were exhausted, and missing his call only made you feel even worse. You hoped Kite didn't think you were ignoring him.

You didn't exactly have the best track record with relationships. Or any serious ones.

But this was one you truly wanted. Kite was sweet. He had a presence that was both calming and intimidating, depending on the person. You found a comfort in his strength along with his unwavering resolve.

Then there was that last factor that had sealed the deal.

The boys both adored him. They respected him. They trusted him.

And in your eyes it was perfect. A partner who didn't mind that you had two children practically hanging off of you. Somebody who made the effort to teach them something.

This was a relationship you were willing to fight for.

But damnit four months was too long.

You were getting restless by the second. Hearing his voice just wasn't enough to satiate the need to have him with you. It wasn't enough to dispel the desire that only grew stronger in his absence. Normally you'd be able to take care of yourself, but your fingers just couldn't compare to his cock. Not since that first time together.

So being the little shit that you were, you figured you'd just give him an incentive to finish up his work sooner.

Making sure your door was locked, you snapped a picture.

--------------------

There was a small buzz in Kite's pocket, alerting him to a new message. It was a miracle this building had some semblance of service. He figured it wouldn't hurt to check since it might be important. He was caught off guard to see it was from you.

Meaning that yes, it was very important.

He clicked open the notification and froze.

Now this was different. Did you know you were starting a very dangerous game? Because why, why had you sent this right when he was in a meeting with his team?!?!

He couldn't stop the red that slowly consumed his face the longer he stared. It had been so long. So very long since he last touched you. And now seeing this, your nipples peaking out from the flimsy shirt you were wearing...

He really had to finish this project up as soon as he could.

"You holding up okay there, Kite?" Spin's voice had snapped him out of his thoughts.

He figured he must've looked like a mess from the concerned stares of his team.

"Fine. We'll finish up here by the end of the week, then send everyone home."

He tried his best to sound professional, but his mind kept circling back to that damn picture. Even in spirit you were such a tease.

-----------------------

You were surprised to say the least. Delighted, but surprised. A message from Kite. There finally must've been some good service, and you briefly wondered if he'd seen your little gift. If he had that sweet flustered expression when he realized what it was.

You clicked open the message and immediately panicked.

You were in public. You were currently having lunch with the boys. And the message you just got was a picture.

A picture of your boyfriend holding his very red and leaky member.

You supposed you deserved it though, you did do it first. And it's not like you were complaining about the image itself, just the setting you were currently viewing it in.

You could make out the small vein that ran along his shaft along with the slight curve upwards. The dribble of pre that had slipped onto his oh so deliciously long fingers. You could feel warmth spread across your face and a desire spark in your gut.

You quickly shut your phone off to avoid the embarrassment that would surely follow if someone saw it.

God you really needed a break to track his ass down.

-----------

Kite was grateful to be back in the comfort of his hotel room again. Just a few more days until he would see you. A few more days until he could touch you.

The thought that he might've went a little too far with the picture he sent crossed his mind. But he knew you. He knew you were direct and preferred it when others were the same.

That didn't mean he wasn't a smidge embarrassed for sending it anyway. He wasn't used to being this forward.

To his surprise there was another buzz coming from his phone. It was from you.

And it was a voice message.

He had a feeling he knew what it was. You were gonna be the death of him. With a slight eagerness, he clicked it.

"Do you, mmm, know how hard it's been for me to cum." He heard you let out a soft whine along with the familiar sound of slick. He had never been so relieved to be alone.

"You've ruined me, you know. I can't satisfy myself without you. And it's not like I have the means to keep any toys around."

Those words had made him harden instantly. To know that you needed him for your pleasure. That your body craved him, and only him.

No toys was just a nice bonus to add onto how tight you'd be when he finally got his hands on you again.

The message ended with a soft moan and the sound of what he could only assume was your fingers moving a steady pace inside you.

He was straining uncomfortably in his pants. Then an idea struck him. He already one-upped you once, what was the harm in going a little further.

You deserved a taste of your own medicine, especially with how painfully hard you just made him.

------------------

You weren't expecting another notification so soon. It was just a few minutes after you tried (and failed) to get rid of your growing sexual frustration.

You had never been so grateful to have the hindsight to book two separate rooms. If things went as planned, Leorio would take the boys off your back for a few days. Plenty of time for you to find your partner and satisfy both your needs.

But for now.....

Oh wow

It was a video this time. How cute, it was like he was competing with you. Maybe next time you'd call him to up the ante once more.

It started and you were once again met with the sight of your boyfriend's cock, his hand wrapped firmly around the base. You could feel the pressure in your core grow.

"Look what you've done, love. You've got me so wound up, I had to end the expedition early just to see you." You watched his hand give firm strokes, stopping every once in a while to thumb the slit of his head. They became faster as he voiced out his frustrations.

"You've been naughty, sending me your tits while I'm working." He let out a groan that made you impossibly wet.

"So desperate for me to be inside you." Then a murmur of 'Just a few more days,' before the screen started shaking in his grip. You didn't think you could take it if he came. The feeling of wanting him inside, all of him, would be too great.

But damnit if you didn't want to see him make a mess all over himself. Your pretty boy come undone from just the thought of you.

"You know, you've ruined me too. I don't think I'll ever truly be satisfied unless I'm so snug inside you, I can't pull out." His breathing got heavier and just before that warm spurt of cum could shoot out, the video ended.

Three days, you'd wait three days before you left to find him.

-------------

You had called him this time, just a few days later. And if he knew you, it was probably a good thing he just checked into another hotel. His last stop before coming back to you.

But things had gone a little differently than expected when he answered. Not in a bad way, god not in a bad way.

He hadn't gotten a word in before you started speaking.

"Open up, loser. I'm here to ride you."

He almost choked from the suddenness. He was not expecting this sudden turn of events. It had slipped his mind that you could find him yourself. And god was he grateful you did. Anymore of your teasing would drive him mad.

"You're at the door?" There was a light tapping that followed.

"Yeah that's me. Unless you've got someone else you're waiting on? But I gotta say, I'm not too fond about sharing."

A jolt of arousal ran through him.

"You're snippier than usual. Are you really that needy, love?" He had unlocked his door and opened it.

He was met with the sight of you and a very playful glint in your eye. The two of you stared at each other for a few seconds. Taking in the appearances you both desperately missed.

"Hi, baby."

Kite's face went a light shade of red at your greeting. For a brief second, the playfulness of your expression melted away into something softer.

"Hi." A few more seconds of peace, and then you had slammed into his chest for a very much needed embrace.

His arms wrapped tightly around your waist and kept you there to plant a kiss on your forehead. You looked up and pulled him back down for a proper one.

It was soft, despite the vulgar circumstances that had brought the two of you together. You parted reluctantly, with Kite chasing after your lips.

"We've got a week all to ourselves," you started.

A week was plenty of time for just yourselves. There would be more intruded on time, but a week was more than enough to feel you scraping your nails down Kite's back as he fucked into you.

You placed a hand on his chest as you took a step into his hotel room.

"Let's have some fun today and spend the rest of the week catching up. Maybe go on a decent date, hmm? What do you say my pretty boy?"

The lust in the air had returned.

"Sounds perfect."

The door shut closed behind you and like a rubber band, the two of you snapped.

Your kisses hungry as Kite pushed you against the wall. Mouth opening quickly to let his tongue dance with yours in a perfect symphony. You let out a whine at the feeling of his hand guiding your leg up around his waist.

His cock pressed deliciously into your moistening core. The friction from the light roll of his hips made your head dizzy.

You'd barley started and already it was becoming too much.

The kiss ended with a string of saliva connecting you two. It broke as you quickly lifted off your shirt and tossed it into an unknown corner.

You squeaked at a harsh grab to your ass.

"Jump." You didn't hesitate to follow his instructions, too focused on the pressure steadily pressing into your cunt to be mean.

You lifted yourself up as Kite's hands went under your ass to secure you. Your legs wrapped around his waist, hands gripping his shoulders for life as his movements became more intense.

Lips attached themselves to your collarbone. The sucking sensation making you push his head down further into your breasts.

The very same that had distracted Kite from his work. The ones he'd be sure to mark up in dark bruises so you knew he only wanted you. The same way you only wanted him.

Your bra was quickly discarded to give him better access. Your chest heaving so hard up and down, it was practically inviting him to take one of your soft buds into his mouth.

"H-hey!" You whimpered out at the feeling of teeth scraping down your nipple. The added stimulation had you clenching around nothing. You reached up and tugged on his silver locks to ground yourself.

You were met with a groan and another squeeze to your ass.

At this rate you'd make a mess in your pants. And judging by the now erratic roll of his hips, so was Kite.

You tugged harder on his scalp as he switched breasts. A well aimed thrust to you clit had you whining.

"Wait, wait, wait! You're gonna make me cum!" You didn't want to climax so early. Not when he hadn't even had a chance to be inside you. That and it would be embarrassing.

Your own fingers had failed you, but just grinding on each other was the thing that would do you in?

Kite detached from your now reddening nipple. His gaze was heated and his face had that flustered expression you loved so much.

"Then cum, since it's what you wanted so badly a few days ago. But we won't be finished until I say so." With another well aimed thrust, you felt white hot pleasure course through your body.

Your legs tensed up tight around him as you felt your pussy clamp down around nothing. A wanton moan slipping past your lips with a new surge of wetness leaking out of you. The coil in your belly at last snapping.

You'd get him back for that. For believing he was the one in control. You wouldn't be done here until you milked his cock for everything he's worth. Until you'd taken every last drop from him.

You came down from your high to see a smug expression on your boyfriend's face. Very pleased with the affect he had on you.

Okay so maybe you'd let him keep topping you. Just for tonight. A shame though, you really wanted to ride his pretty cock.

Your hands released their grip on his hair, instead moving to cup his face.

"You feel that?" You ground your hips down on his hardness, a noticeable wet spot in the middle on your pants.

"You did that to me. You make me so needy that just the thought of you filling me up is enough. You're mine, and I'm never gonna let you go."

Kite couldn't believe that was all it took to have him cumming in his pants. That he was yours, and despite the temporary long distance, your mind hadn't changed.

Your words of affirmation brought him to his peak in a way that had him bitting into your neck to cope with the pleasure.

He was gonna ruin you when he recovered.

You hissed at the sting but cradled his head tucked into your neck. Letting him continue to hump into your clothed cunt until he was satisfied.

You swiped his hat off to get a better look at his expression when he finally separated from your neck.

Lidded eyes and a flush that went from the base of his neck to the tips of his ears.

You weren't so kept together yourself. Chest and neck covered with splotchy bruises, eyes darkened with a certain hunger that was about to be fulfilled.

A soft kiss was pressed to your lips. You returned it, fingers once again threading through silver locks. A murmur of 'I love you,' before you were carried towards the bed.

Your hands went under his shirt, lightly tracing over lean muscle.

"Love you too, now let me see you." Your hands wandered down his torso, stopping at the edge of his turtleneck. With a nod of confirmation, it was lifted up and discarded.

In your desperation to fuck out your frustrations last time, you'd missed the faint scarring that littered his skin. Now that things were going a little slower, you could clearly make them out.

Those damn ants had done a number on him.

But you didn't really mind them. Because to you, Kite was beautiful no matter what. And as he made quick work of your pants, you could tell he really didn't mind either.

"Do you want me to touch you?" His voice sounded a little shy. He could very clearly see the damp spot from when you'd cum earlier. He was more than ready to split your pussy open with his cock, but if wanted to indulge in a little foreplay, he would wait.

"I've waited four months for you. Don't make me wait longer." Your hands tugged at his pants. Seems the both of you couldn't hold back anymore.

So your underwear was pulled down and out of the way along with the rest of Kite's clothes.

Like last time, he made sure to keep one hand intertwined with yours while the other was on your hip.

You almost cried with relief as he sunk in. The stretch felt euphoric. Immediately your legs had wrapped around his waist, trying to push him in deeper. The both of you moaned at the sensation. At the closeness that you'd both been denied.

Kite pulled out slightly, hand gripping yours tightly as he thrusted back in. You were so tight. So perfect and warm. Your walls clinging to him like they'd never let him go.

His own cock making a home for itself inside you. The size reminding you of why you'd officially been ruined for any other man. Filling you so nicely it bumped into your cervix.

Speaking of filling you up...

"We really outta stop doing this without condoms," you whimpered out as he gave another shallow thrust. It's not like you didn't like the idea of kids because you did. You really did. But as of right now, it wasn't ideal. At least not with the current circumstances.

To your surprise, the snap of Kite's hips increased. His pace speeding up, earning a gasp of pleasure from you.

"Don't worry, I'll take care of you. The both of you if it takes." The hand holding yours disappeared for a second to adjust your position, legs being folded up to your chest. The new angle making you see stars.

Your mind becoming hazy as your boyfriend pounded into you with new fervor. Your now free hands reaching behind his back with your nails sinking in. It felt so good.

So deep he was bullying your cervix.

Your body trying its best to meet his thrusts. There was a hot pressure bubbling up once again. The stickiness between your bodies growing as you took in his words.

You'd have left it at that, but some part of you wanted to push a little further.

"Gonna, hah, leave for twelve years after?"

There was a harsh nip to your neck followed by a soft lap of the tongue. His bruising pace consistent.

"Gonna give you another one if you compare me to him again. I'm practically raising his son with you." You clenched down hard on his cock, nails scraping down his back.

That was not an answer you were expecting.

Kite tried to stifle his moan against your neck. He pressed harder against you, no longer pulling out. Instead rutting fast inside your tightening pussy.

You could feel yourself get impossibly close. If the thought of filling you up made him this feral....

An evil idea struck you then. You did love to tease, consequences be damned.

"Yeah?" You couldn't stop the high pitched whimper that left you as your clit brushed against him. You wouldn't last much longer.

"Wanna get me pregnant to show off? Wanna be a daddy for me?" You felt his movements stutter.

You knew what you were doing to him, but he couldn't help taking the bait. Not when your own words had caused you to gush around him.

And god hearing it from you made him want to stuff you with cum until there was no more room. Fill you up so good your stomach would be bulging.

So that's exactly what he did.

With his cock twitching inside you and the pressure in his stomach snapping, he filled your creamy cunt to the brim. Your own orgasm triggering from the warmth spreading inside you.

You'd tensed around Kite, keeping him firmly in place as you came. The spasms from your cunt milking him dry.

Your expression was fucked out when you finally released him. The snark wiped off and replaced. There were a few new bruises to your collection. A very large one on your waist and some small ones on the backs of your legs.

Maybe he was a little rough with you, but to be fair four months was a long time to wait. Unbearable with the sexting you initiated.

He moved to pull out and was stopped by your voice.

"Don't... We'll clean up in the morning. I want cuddles and you feel nice inside." You'd make him hard again if you kept running your mouth.

But he supposed you had a point. There was no need to rush this time. You had the opportunity to spend the night(a few nights actually), why not enjoy it?

He rolled you over so you were face to face, and pulled your body snug against his.

"I love you, Y/n." There was a kiss to your forehead. He didn't think he'd ever get tired of finally being able to tell you.

"I love you too, my pretty boy." And you'd never get tired of reminding him you felt the same.

-----------

[thebibutterflyao3]

Day Twelve - Prompt: Iced @rosekiller-microfic

March Daily Series - 674 words

<<<Previous Part OR Start Here

When he stepped out of the shower, Barty was relieved to smell ramen. He’d fully expected Frank to opt for something absurdly spicy that he’d regret eating later. There was no point in pretending that he would have eaten it anyway. Barty couldn’t be bothered to cook.

“Crouch, are you decent?” Frank called.

“Morally? No. Physically? Also, no.”

Frank’s chuckle echoed down the hall. “Well, put your pants on and join me in the garden.”

By the time he reached the back door, Frank had a substantial meal spread out on the metal table set up on the patio facing their small, private garden. The small patch of fenced in grass was a little depressing in the winter, but it was better than nothing.

“Picked up an iced drink for you too,” Frank said, pushing the cup toward him. “Bit late for coffee, but you look like you could use it.”

Barty dropped into a chair and reached for the bright pink drink gratefully. “Thanks. I don’t remember the last time I ate a fruit, to be honest.”

“That tracks.”

Halfway through the meal, Barty realised that Frank was watching him eat. He ignored it. Frank didn’t understand him, not really. He knew Barty, but he couldn’t begin to fathom why he did the things he did. Not like Evan did.

Fuck, I miss him.

“Alright, mate?”

Barty shrugged as he scooped another bite of ramen into his mouth. The longer he could put off this conversation, the better. He knew that Frank would give him a world of shite about the ulcer. Living with a “health conscious” bloke was a nightmare sometimes.

Frank cocked his head to the side and studied him as he bit into a sushi roll. Of the dozen or so rolls that he’d bought, Barty managed to keep down three. This was probably the healthiest meal that he’d eaten since he left the flat a week ago.

“Why are you wincing?”

Barty glanced up at him. “Wincing?”

“Every few bites, you’re wincing like it hurts. Bad tooth?” Frank guessed.

“No. Ulcer, I think.”

“Ulcer? Did you see a doctor?”

Barty levelled an unimpressed look at his flatmate, then shovelled more rice into his mouth. The rice was filling and his stomach seemed to tolerate it a bit better than anything else. He’d avoided the eggs altogether though. That felt like tempting fate.

“Of course not,” Frank said, shaking his head. “Did the drive help at all?”

“What do you think?”

Frank considered him for a beat, then sighed. “You made it worse, didn’t you?”

“Of course I fucking did.”

He should know better by now. I am a class A fuck-up. There is no “helping” myself anymore, just trying to mitigate the damage.

“Barty, when are you going to admit that you need therapy?”

“That’s rather obvious, I’d think,” Barty snarked, taking a long sip of his drink. It was very good and soothed his belly nicely. “There’s no point whinging over it to some overpaid twat. It won’t change anything.”

“It could change things.”

Barty waved his chopsticks dismissively. He didn’t need therapy, he needed Evan.

“Mate, you can’t just ignore your trauma.”

“Sure I can. How do you think I’ve made it this far?”

Frank frowned, his forehead creased with deep furrows. “What does that mean? You’ve survived? That’s the bare fucking minimum.”

Barty shrugged it off and focused on his ramen. Considering how close he’d come to throwing himself into the Bristol Channel earlier today, surviving was good enough. Some days it was an actual accomplishment to continue existing in this hellscape that he called a life.

Evan made this shite life worth it.

The thought landed like a punch to the gut and Barty had to steady himself to stay upright. He set the chopsticks down and folded his arms on the table as his mind whirled. Without Evan, he had nothing to look forward to for the foreseeable future.

I need to fix this. How the actual fuck am I going to fix this?

Next Part>>>

[justagalwhowrites]

Hey babes!!! I’ve been on vacay so im trying to get caught up on your post 😂 but i saw your prompt lists and i think 3 5 18 or 19 with LOTS of angst and a happy ending would be AMAZINGGGGG🫠🤍

OMG Hi Bestie!

Remember when I put this prompt list out there? I barely do! It was like 6 weeks ago, that's why! I've been AWFUL and finishing the 500 follower celebration. I got so hung up on finishing Lavender and Beskar Doll and starting Yearling and going on vacation that I still have requests from this sitting in my inbox... and I'm now at 946 followers 🫠🫠🫠

BUT THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS REQUEST! @encephalitiskat also requested prompt number 3 and I came up with this little non-canon angsty trip outside the QZ for Doc and Joel. I hope you like it!

Lost and Found

You and Joel run into trouble on a run outside the QZ. Based on prompt 3: “I almost lost you.”

Pairing: Joel Miller x Female Reader (Lavender pairing)

CW: Canon-typical violence. Threat of SA. Minors DNI, 18+ Only.

Length: 2.4k

You tried to avoid winter runs as much as you could. For starters, it was cold. Even after years in Boston, part of you still longed for the warm weather of your college years in Texas. At least your apartment had heat, you could curl up under your quilt with a cup of tea. Sometimes, Tommy would come over and you’d keep each other warm and the cold was suddenly inviting. 

But you weren’t at home. No, you were on a run, one that Tess and Tommy had both stayed back from. Tommy had some Firefly thing to take care of, Tess had broken her arm on the last job. That left you and Joel. 

Out in the cold. 

Outside Boston. 

And you were miserable. 

“Keep up,” Joel looked over his shoulder at you, scowling, as usual. He was always fucking scowling. 

“You have longer legs than me,” you were panting for breath, hot below your heavy coat in spite of the frigid air. “I don’t like being stuck out here with you any more than you like being stuck out here with me but I’d rather not get so exhausted racing through snow that we don’t make it back to Boston.” 

“If we’re makin’ it back to fuckin’ Boston alive we need to move faster than you’re movin’ so keep. Up.” 

You ground your teeth but tried to listen. Even though you knew you’d get your way before too long. It was going to be dark soon, the sun already low in the sky, and you were at least four hours from the QZ. 

Even though that was going to mean another night on the road with Joel. 

Joel, who hated you. Fucking hated you. Hated you so much that the last two nights you’d been outside the QZ he glared at you or ignored you entirely. You could feel it pouring off him, the loathing. 

You’d thought you’d have gotten used to it by now. But it hurt. It hurt every single time. You’d loved him what felt like your whole life, with your whole being. Even after you found out about what he’d done before he’d come to the QZ, you loved him so damn much that you’d set it aside within yourself. It didn’t matter, none of it mattered, all that mattered was that he had made it this far alive and you could forgive almost anything if it led to that. 

The hate you could take. Most of the time, anyway. The indifference, though. The total lack of anything in his eyes and on his face, like he was looking right through you, like you didn’t exist. That was worse. That alone, you thought, could kill you. 

You tried not to think about it, not to linger on it. It turned your stomach to knots and sent your mind down paths you knew you should avoid, especially when you were outside the QZ and facing the threat of infected and raiders. 

It made your guard low. Even when you knew you should pay close attention to Joel’s deaf side - the ear you couldn’t whisper in during the year he could tolerate your presence in the QZ - you didn’t. 

Not until it was too late. 

You sensed the raider a split second before you felt him, heard him, smelled him. His hand closed around your wrist and pulled you sharply to the ground, his body all but materializing out of the trees beside you, their shadows so long and dark you hadn’t seen him. You hadn’t been paying attention. 

“Joel!” You shrieked as you fell. “Run!” 

You had a moment where you relieved about his indifference. He’d leave you there if he didn’t care, he’d get out if he didn’t care. You weren’t stupid, you knew you were a vulnerability in situations like this. It’s why he didn’t want to take you to begin with. You dragged him, Tess and Tommy down. Tommy was stupid enough to put himself on the line to keep you safe but Joel, you were certain, would get the fuck out before he was overrun or hurt. 

You were wrong. 

He spun toward you, his gun raised as three other men came out from the trees. One went right for Joel from the side - when he was too busy focusing on you - and slammed into him, sending him to the ground. 

The man who had you pawed at you, pulling at your pack and fumbling for your weapon in your waistband before you had a chance to go for it. He yanked your pack off and you tried to crawl away but he grabbed your ankle and yanked you back, making you shriek again. 

“Such a pretty thing,” the man all but fell on top of you, knocking the air out of you. He grabbed your braid and pulled your head back, his teeth against the soft skin of your cheek. “Can think of all kinds of uses for you…” 

You slammed your elbow back into him as best you could and he grunted in what sounded like a combination of shock and pain. You were able to shove him off of you and clamber to your feet to see the other three men trying to contain Joel. 

You didn’t even think about it, didn’t think about the fact that it was stupid as hell, that you didn’t know how to fight worth a damn, that you’d never killed anything but infected. You just saw Joel, on the ground, overwhelmed, being hit again and again and you acted in the only way you could think to act. You launched yourself at the nearest man, your arms going around his neck until you heard him cough and gag, digging his fingers into your forearms as you clung to him for dear life. You sank your teeth into his neck and he let out a strangled yelp as he tried to dislodge you. 

He stumbled back from Joel, you still wrapped around his back, when he gave up on pulling your arms free from his neck. Instead, he reached back and grabbed your shirt at the nape of your neck by the fistful with one hand, your braid with the other, ripping you up and over his shoulder and throwing you like a rag doll into a tree. 

“Fucking bitch!” He was panting and you couldn’t seem to get your body to cooperate quite yet. Your head was spinning and you were trying to sit up but everything hurt, everything. You were seeing double and both versions of the man were stalking toward you, freeing the knife at his belt. “Not even worth fuckin’ but I bet your man would hate to hear you scream…” 

“Don’t fucking touch her!” Joel shrieked, something unhinged in his voice. You couldn’t get your eyes to focus, everything beyond the man prowling for you jagged and unclear. “I’ll fuckin’ kill you, touch her and I’ll fuckin’ kill you!” 

The man ignored him, going down on one knee next to your place on the ground like some kind of perverse proposal. He smiled and you could see the rot on his teeth. 

“Maybe you are worth fuckin’,” he held the knife up. “Just to piss off your boyfriend…” 

“He won’t care,” you shook your head, doing your best to scramble back from him, your body still not ready to listen after being thrown and hitting your head. “He’s not my… he won’t care, I’m not worth it, remember?” 

He grabbed your hair fiercely, forcing a small yelp from you as he yanked your head back. There was blood on the snow, you realized. Your blood, from where you’d hit your head. 

“Startin’ to think you are worth it,” he slid the knife over your coat, cutting it open at the zipper. “Might just need to keep you…” 

You kicked and caught him on the side, making him groan and you rushed to pull yourself away as he grabbed your ankle. You could hear the struggle of Joel with the other men and your heart was pounding, the terror thrumming through you. 

This was it. You’d been so busy longing for Joel you’d gotten him killed. He was going to die and you were going to end up enslaved by raiders, the exact thing he’d said would happen if you left the QZ. Joel was going to die and it was your fault. 

He pulled you back toward him and he forced you onto your back before straddling your hips, his heavy weight pressing you down into the earth and you wanted it to swallow you, wanted to do anything that would make this ending different. 

You barely noticed that the struggle with Joel and the other men had gone quiet when the man on you was ripped away from you. He cried out, shocked, and Joel threw him on the ground. 

“Told you I’d fuckin’ kill you,” Joel panted, blood dripping from his mouth. He shot the man before he had a chance to respond. 

He put the gun in his waistband before he went for you, eyes running up and down your body again and again in the seconds it took to reach you. 

You were desperately trying not to panic, trying to not devolve into something that couldn’t handle itself and would just get left in the woods outside the city. You wouldn’t make it back on your own, you didn’t have the skills and you weren’t sure how badly you were hurt. 

He dropped to his knees beside you, one hand going to your ribs, the other going to your face, his gloved thumb brushing your bleeding temple. 

“Joel,” you couldn’t seem to keep your voice steady. You closed your eyes and forced yourself to swallow. “Joel, if you’re leaving me out here, please give me a gun at least I can’t…” 

“Not leavin’ you,” he said. “Need you to tell me how to check for a concussion.” 

You opened your eyes again at that, brows knitting together as you looked at him. 

“What…” 

“Concussion,” he repeated. “C’mon, Baby, walk me through how to check for one…”

“Um,” you had to close your eyes to focus. He was so close, he looked so afraid. “Blurred or double vision, eye strain, light sensitivity, pupils that aren’t dilating properly, eye movement, confusion and inability to focus, loss of consciousness.” 

“Right, OK,” he said. He sounded afraid, too, why was he so afraid? It was Joel, it didn’t make sense for him to be this afraid. “Gotta open your eyes for me, Baby, alright? Tell me how many fingers you see, OK?” 

You opened your eyes and he was holding up three fingers. You answered and he nodded, looking relieved. He used his flashlight as dusk started to fade to check your pupils. He seemed satisfied with those, too. 

“Know who you are?” He asked. “Where you are? Who you’re with?” You nodded. He looked insistent. You sighed and said your name before going down the rest of the list in order.  

“I’m outside the Boston QZ,” you said. “With Joel Miller… please don’t just leave me out here, Joel, I know you hate me but…” 

“Don’t hate you,” he cut you off. You frowned. He ignored it. “Think you can walk? Not far from a suburb, we can find a place for the night there…” 

“Yeah,” you nodded. “Yeah, I can walk.” 

He pulled you to your feet and you had to lean on him for a moment to catch your balance. But when you tried to pull away, his grip on you remained. He held onto you with one hand, his gun clutched in the other, waiting for someone else to come out of the woods. 

“Are you OK?” You asked, looking up at him. “There were so many of them on you and…”

“M’Fine.” 

He was still holding onto you. 

The suburbs Joel mentioned were close and it didn’t take long to find a house that met whatever standard Joel was looking for. You weren’t arguing. Your head was starting to swim and you were pretty sure it was because you were losing blood. 

“On the counter,” Joel ordered once you were both safely inside and he’d locked everything down and closed all the curtains. He put his hands on your waist and helped you up before stepping between your legs to look at your injured head. You tried not to think about it. 

“You’re gonna be OK Baby,” he said. He still sounded so worried. You frowned. Why? “Gonna get you cleaned up, patch this up…” 

“Joel,” you began, but he cut you off. 

“I almost lost you,” he took your head in his hand, his fingers curling around the base of your skull and around your neck as he brought his forehead to your own. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “Can’t lose you, Baby, I can’t. You gotta stay with me, OK? Please, I’ll beg if I have to but you can’t leave me, not like this, OK? Don’t make me lose you, please. Can’t lose you…” 

“Not going anywhere,” you said gently, chest tight. “I promise.” 

He pulled back from you with a nod and went about the business of patching you up to get the bleeding at your head under control. 

“Joel,” you said as he finished and he dropped his forehead to your own again, his body so close to your own. “I don’t understand…” 

“I’ve been a fuckin’ idiot,” he said softly. “I’ve been so goddamn stupid. But I’m so scared, I’m so scared all the fucking time with you. Thought if I pushed you away hard enough and far enough that I could live with it but I can’t… I can’t lose you and I almost lost you and I’m done being a fuckin’ idiot with you. I know I don’t deserve it, I know you’ve got no reason to trust me at all, but… if you can find a way to let me back into your life. I don’t care how, I’ll be whatever you want me to be to you but please, don’t let me lose you. Please, Baby.” 

You reached up, running your fingers through his curls, and gently pulled his lips to yours. He kissed you soft and slow and gentle and he still felt like home against your body. 

“Can’t lose me, Joel,” you whispered. He nodded against you before kissing you again for a moment before you could continue. “I’m yours. Always have been, always will be.”  

[theshotsheardacrossworlds]

Hope

Beatrice tells Zevlor she needs to go to the House of Hope. SFW.

I’m sorry, Zev.

“There’s something I need to tell you.”

Zevlor stiffened, his chest tightening. “Oh?”

Be brave. You’re doing the right thing.

Then why does it feel like I’m betraying him?

Hurting him?

Beatrice snuggled against him as they lay in his bed at the temple. Another hard day. Tomorrow will be harder. “Do you remember when I said that the Emperor is keeping the githyanki prince imprisoned to prevent us from turning? Well, there’s a way to free him.”

“I’m sensing a but, dear.” he said, quirking an eyebrow.

She sighed. “The means to free him is in the House of Hope…which is in Avernus.”

His hold on her tightened. “Is there no other way?”

He’s scared. Scared I won’t come back. He gave me hints of how awful it was, but I have a feeling it’s so much worse.

“I’m afraid not, love. The hammer is in the House of Hope. That’s where we’re going tomorrow.”

“Promise me that you’ll return. Promise me.” Though she could not see it, she could hear it in his voice. He’s crying. Oh Zev, no.

She shifted to look at him. “Of course I am. How could I not?” Believe me. Please. “We have a lovely future ahead of us, Zev. I’m fighting for that. Well, and for the Moonmaiden and everyone obviously, but quite a bit of it is fighting for our future. For us. That gives me the strength to carry on, because fuck me, there’ve been points where I’ve cried and screamed and hoped that all this has been a weird, awful nightmare…but then I think about you. About us. And that makes me happy.” And now I’m crying. “When I’m with you, I’m the happiest I’ve ever been. I love you, and I swear in My Lady’s name, I will always come back to you.”

Zevlor pulled her back against his chest, a choked sob escaping him. He rocked them slowly and whispered to her, “I-I had no idea the depth of your feelings. Truly? I bring you that much joy?”

She began to laugh. “Zev, really?! After I said all that, that’s what you think?” Beatrice placed a few kisses on his chest and continued to giggle. “Gods, yes. Yes, you make me that happy.”

And I am coming back.

With Her strength and grace, I shall prevail.

***

As soon as Beatrice, Halsin, Gale, and Astarion returned to the Devil’s Fee, the three gentlemen badgered me into returning to the Elfsong Tavern to clean up and spend the night with Zevlor at the temple.

“Alright, alright---I’m leaving! Have a great everyone!” She laughed, waving to her companions. Once her steps were no longer heard on the stairs, Lae’zel spoke.

“If Bea doesn’t ride that teeth-ling like a knight rides her steed, then she is a fool.”

***

Zevlor was reading a book of poetry when his lover burst into his room.

There she stood triumphantly in my new favorite dress (the white one from Master Figaro), hands on her wide, soft hips. “Told you I’d be back.”

He tossed his book on the table and raced to her open arms. “By the waking gods, you did it! You did it! My love!” Hugging her, she could feel his relief. “Oh my darling, you did it!”

You bet your red ass I did, love.

“Zev, I killed a devil in his own house. The Orphic Hammer is ours. I freed a prisoner. And…and…I got some kickass armor! And now,” she kissed his nose. “I get to be with you tonight, as ordered by the group.”

He shook his head with a half-smile tugging on his lips. “Then I’ll be sure to thank them a later date for allowing me the privilege of your company tonight…I…” Why does he look so nervous all of a sudden? “I…”

Wait.

Letting go of her, he reached into one of his pockets and got on one knee.

Oh.

My.

Gods.

It’s happening.

Clearing his throat, Zevlor opened a small jewelry box with a—

WAIT A SECOND!

I KNOW THAT RING!

THAT’S MUM’S!!!!!

“Zev—”

He shook his head again, staring up at her with shining eyes. “Please, pulchra. I need…I wanted to wait for a suitable moment, but after today, I must…I must…I’ve thought much about what you said last night---about how happy I make you.” He bit back a sob. “You must know that I feel the same way. With you, I feel as if all the suffering and hardship I endured is worth it if you are the reward. I realize that out of your many suitors,” I had approximately two but alright, love. “I am at a disadvantage in nearly every way---I am an old tiefling Hellrider, I plan to retire once this whole Absolute business is done with, and I yearn for peace and quiet. However, I cannot deny how I feel…how you make me feel…I wish to spend whatever years I have left with you. I am yours, my darling girl, if you will have me. Will you marry me?”

A breathy laugh escaped her as she smiled and nodded. “First of all, yes, I will marry you…but more importantly, Zev---that’s Mum’s engagement ring. How did—”

Slipping the ring onto her left ring finger, he rose to his feet. “Your mother came here some weeks ago, asking to speak to me. I, of course, said yes. She said it was your late father’s wish and hers that if I was serious about you that I should use her ring.” He exhaled sharply, absentmindedly rubbing his thumb over the ring. “Your mother is a formidable woman, pulchra. I see where you get it from.” He winked, smirking at her.

WHAT?!

“Zev! Moonmaiden take me, I am not like my mum.”

AM I?!?!?

He laughed, bringing her hand to his mouth, gently kissing her knuckles. “Hmph, in battle and throughout this journey, you most assuredly are, my dear. But enough of that. We should celebrate, no?” Oh, that’s his tail going around my leg. “Have you eaten?”

She shook her head. “No, and I am hungry…and tired.” Really tired. But tomorrow is finding the way to Duke Ravengard to rescue him.

Stay in the moment, Bea.

Zevlor snorted. “I don’t doubt it. Sit down, darling. I’ll run to the kitchen and make a tray for you.”

After he pulled out a chair for her and helped her sit down (he’s such a gentleman, my Zev), she watched him leave and sighed happily.

You were right, Da. “Never stop hoping.”

I never did.

And now I’m going to marry the most wonderful man in the world after saving…the world.

It’s a bit complicated, if I’m being honest…

But as long as I have Zevlor, then I’m content.

No, more than content.

Happy.

[couchpotatoaniki]

One Year ❣︎ Eleven: Friends Are There Through Thick And Thin

Chapter summary: You hear San out, which leads to an unexpectedly difficult talk for the both of you. Things are shifting, and neither of you don’t know what to do.

Pairing: Mafia!San x Fem!Reader Series Genre: Mafia AU, fluff, angst, eventual smut, lotta crack and stupid shit ngl Chapter warnings: swearing, mentions of abuse, mentions of ptsd, anxiety, hints to sleep paralysis, Word count: 5.1k+ A 365 Days parody

A/N: I’m back from my hiatus and my god I missed this so much 😭😭 this chapter’s a bit angsty but the next one will make up for it, I promise.

Previous: Chapter Ten

For the rest of the series, click here

Speech and bracketed speech in bold means they’re talking in Korean

Speech and bracketed speech in italics is whatever the reader wants their native langue to be that’s not Korean or English

Speech without either means they’re talking in English

“The first time I met the Jeong family was shortly after Ma died,” San began, in a low relaxed tone as if he was talking about what he had for lunch yesterday. “I was quite young, but my father was grief-stricken and I stepped up to support him. He didn’t want me to but he wasn’t as strong as he used to be in arguments with me after her passing, so he just let me learn the trades of our business.”

He chuckled darkly, rubbing the tip of his thumb along the soft plush of his lower lip. “Should’ve listened to him,” he admitted with a hint of regret in his voice and a darkness in his eye you recognised from your own reflection. “Should’ve stayed a kid a little bit longer like Ma wanted me to and not want to be the hero that could fix everything like she seemed to do.”

His deep gaze bore into you for a few beats until he spoke once more. “The first time I met the Jeong family, the patriarch was beating the ever living shit out of his own son.”

You tried your best not to freeze, and although you knew of the treatment Yunho had endured there, it certainly felt a whole lot different hearing it from someone else. Hearing it from San.

He noticed your shift and gently grasped your hand over the table, running his thumb soothingly against your knuckles to try and ease the horror he could feel building inside you.

“My dad,” he resumed in that detached tone again, “had grown up with a horrible mother and an even worse father. When he met Ma, he was still a bit of a...’fixer upper’. But he changed. Said he wanted to give himself a reason for her to be proud of loving him, a reason she would want to call him her husband when the time came for him to propose--and most importantly, he was just so tired of hating his own soul. Wanted to love it as much as she did.”

A soft, intimate smile played against his lips for a brief moment. “Once, she told me that loving him came as easy as breathing.” His eyes flickered to yours, so much weight behind them, and his hand that held yours seared with a heat you couldn’t find yourself to pull away from.

“By the time they had me, they were very clear on what morals I was to have. And neither of them stopped drilling it into me until their dying breath.” San chuckled humourlessly. “Sometimes I still hear their ghosts whisper it into my ears, in the gentle way they spoke.”

His eyes closed as he recounted one of the last things he ever heard his father say all the way back in Santorini five years ago. “(We too have morals. There are some lines we must never cross.) One of them was that family and friends were sacred. You can’t hurt them. Can’t fix them through pain.” 

You do your best not to think of Isaac but his face flashes for the briefest of moments in your mind and you hate yourself all the more for it.

His eyes shut more tightly as if trying to stop seeing the memory once more, a shuddering breath released from his lungs. “I’ve seen and done some horrible shit, Y/N, but what I saw that day? Fucking hell. No child should ever have to suffer that much, never mind at the hands of one of the few people in this cruel world that was supposed to protect him.”

Tears threatened to spill from your eyes as memories resurfaced for you too--of Yunho and his breakdowns, of the scars that littered every inch of his torso, of the slight limp in his left leg and occasional shoulder pain from broken bones that never managed to set quite right. Memories of that sweet, sweet boy made of sunshine and smiles consumed in nightmarish slumber, still trying to fight off the ghosts of his past that felt all too real to him. Frozen. Unable to move. Unable to protect himself.

San may have seen part of the actual abuse Yunho had to endure, but Y/N had to witness for the past five years how he tried so damn hard to not slip back down, even if it sometimes oozed out of the cracks in the walls he built. And Seonghwa? Jesus, Seonghwa was the one who who truly saw it all--how it almost broke Yunho, how he almost broke himself to try to get away from his own mind.

Guilt resurfaced as a heavy knot in your throat, imagining Yunho starting to slip back again. There were triggers but he’d worked well to cope in a healthy way, they all supported him in managing his responses, in helping him re-associate some of those triggers with better, nicer things. But being this close again? God, you should really go back home, end all of this.

But you need to do this. Yunho needs you to do this much at least.

“Y/N,” San coaxes you away from your thoughts, and if he noticed that you disappeared for a few moment, he did not mention it. “I care for you. More than any person on this earth. Would travel through the nine circles of hell and back to protect you. You know that right?”

Strangely, you did. From the reverent way he looks at you, holds your hand, speaks to you. Faking something like that must have needed intervention from some higher being. Without another thought, you nod.

“Good. So you know that I want to keep you far away from things that may harm you. I’m already a dangerous person with many enemies but the Jeong family have a darkness I couldn’t bare to have you near.”

“I don’t need you to protect me, San,” you whisper, voice feeling fragile in such a raw moment. “Got plenty of darkness in me already.”

He looks at you with this sad sort of smile. “I know. Wanna kiss you for being so strong and scorch the world for not stopping itself from hurting you.” He brings the hand still in his own up to his lips, letting it brush along the slightly rough skin in the barest of kisses as if content with feeling the warmth of your soul through your very fingertips. “I’ve been around enough sorrow to know when there is still goodness in something and you have so much goodness in you despite what you’ve been through.”

He pauses.

“Maybe one day you’ll find enough comfort with me to confide in it all. But until then, let me shield you from the unnecessary pain.”

You don’t remember how much time passes as the words seep into your very heart and bones and soul. While the very concept of being cared for and shouldering the burden you carry has always been an unspoken rule between your family and even more so the boys, you’ve never had someone say that to you and it feels almost overwhelming to hear it. As if your brain is having a hard time processing the fact that here is someone on this godforsaken earth who cares for you as deeply as San does and would want to stay by you side in spite of all of that.

In spite of the damage to your soul and pieces missing from your heart.

Even while you were with Dominic, there was a side of you that you felt was unworthy of being seen--shameful even--though it wasn’t you fault. You still had to keep guards up sometimes even with Mingi, and in this very room where the outside world with every messy thing that came with it was just noise far down below, you started to feel the toll it took on you. The energy is sucked out of you, the weight of keeping it up all the time.

Suddenly, confiding in Choi San didn’t seem like a bad idea at all.

But then you remembered that some of the bricks that made up that wall you held up against him weren’t yours to share with him.

“There’s...” Tongue flickering out to lick your lips, you’re unsure of how to phrase this in a way that won’t divulge in too much information, “I just...” You take a deep breath to calm your nerves. God, why was your heart racing that fast?

San could tell the conundrum you were going through. Went through the same after all, with how much he could divulge you with for he too had walls built up and for good reason.

He took the initiative. “You asked about Jeong Yunho specifically... why?”

“I wanted to know what you knew about him.” But neither of you mentioned how from the crumbs San gave you, both of you knew that Yunho was the boy he was talking about. Stiffening the air like dust in an abandoned house.

“Why?” he repeated.

Your mouth opened. Closed. Opened again. Damn it, you were good at this. Good at coming up with shit on the spot--why isn’t your brain working right now? Why do you want to tell him the truth? That truce between you two is starting to shrivel up, walls pushing back up again--

“Remember, Y/N, I can’t give you an answer if you don’t give me a good enough reason in return.” San’s last plea to get you to open up so he could do the same.

You pull your hands from his grasp to run through your hair, and the walls start to go up even higher the both of you can feel it.

Blowing a frustrated breath out you get up from your seat, turn your back to him as you make your way to your nightstand.

The man lets his face crumble as his heart drops in his stomach all the while he watches you walk away from him both physically and mentally. He leans back into the chair, feeling--for the first time in a long time--defeated.

He sees you grab the glass of water on your nightstand and finish the whole thing in a few big gulps. He wants to tell you to be careful, that you’ll choke, but his voice is caught in his tight throat unable to come out.

Setting the glass back down, you take a moment before you turn back to him. There’s something in your eyes that tells him, maybe your wall isn’t fully up yet. There’s some cracks. And then you ask him, in a soft voice, “stay with me the night?” You try to regain some playfulness by narrowing your eyes in a mock glare. “No funny business.”

He musters up as much of a smile as he can at the moment--it’s weak and tired, but there’s the remnants of that brief truce there. He doesn’t speak and neither do you as he walks to the opposite side of the bed and crawls in with you.

You both lie on your backs, you looking up at the ceiling while he looks at you. Making no move to touch you, not even move closer to you.

You close your eyes, letting him gaze at you with those curiously sad eyes of his. So attuned to his breathing, you can tell even when a lot of time--or a little, you can’t tell as the concept doesn’t seem to exist in this room right now, but it feels like a lot--he still hasn’t fallen asleep yet. His thoughts are loud but not loud enough for you to hear them.

He feels the same way about you. Knows that you’re awake, mind running with thoughts that escape him and damn it fucking hurts to be this shut out from you.

You want to speak the words--any words to him or at least intertwine one of your fingers with his. To show some semblance that things have changed, that you have not shut him out completely like he might think.

But at one point, you lose the mental battle and fall into a dreamless sleep.

When you wake, San is nowhere to be found. You’re curled up facing where he would be and feel around to notice that the spot is cold and that side of the bed is made. He’s been gone for a while, you confirm once you notice the time on your phone, because it is almost one in the afternoon and he must have had business to attend to.

That didn’t stop the faint pang inside you at his sudden absence after last night.

Groaning, you roll you body up, trying to rub the sleep from your eyes while you think how could things change so much for you in such a short space of time since you met San.

His crazy seems to be rubbing off on you, since you feel some kind of attachment to him? Or at least, you feel a little more empty when he is not there. Jesus, at this rate, you might actually want to stay with him by the end of the year.

You find that thought terrifying, though not as all-consuming as you expected it to feel. Like the kind of terror that came with standing at the edge of a cliff that you can just as easily back away from into the safety of land rather than stare at the rough dark waters crashing on jagged rocks below.

You have been through enough shit to know when you really need to talk to someone about how you’re feeling. And right now you need to talk to someone.

Run through the talking points in your head as you freshen up in the bathroom, already knowing that today feels like a pyjama day. You feel sick just thinking about the idea of talking about your feelings, that familiar sense of dread curdling in your stomach. So you don’t leave the confines of your bedroom for a late breakfast--you can barely think of stomaching the smell of breakfast.

Cold sweats lace your palms as you click on Mingi’s contact on your phone, practice some level breathing as ringing presses against your ear. It doesn’t take long for you to hear his voice.

“Hey, wassup?”

“Hey,” you try to say confidently but it comes out as a strangled whisper from the funny feeling in your throat.

A pause, and then, “What happened?”

The instinctive answer comes out despite all the mental preparation. “Nothing.”

“Y/N, what happened?”

“Nothing...”

He sighs, “The last time you answered the phone like this and I played along, you were in a horrible situation. I’m not making that mistake again. Now tell me, what happened?”

You don’t know why but hot fat tears spill from your eyes in quick succession against your will. Silent as they come, you know he can tell. He was always able to. “Mingi, I don’t know what to do,” you whisper as it all comes crashing down on you.

“It’s been weeks since everything’s happened and I don’t know why but it’s all come crashing down and I just don’t know what to do.”

“Okay, that okay,” he coaches, “Just grab onto the closest threat. Start from there. Bit by bit.”

“I just,” you try to take deep breaths and make a clumsy attempt to explain the pent up emotions, “it’s so stupid but it only really just hit me how much Dominic hurt, you know? I didn’t love him but I did like him and just... being treated like that, like I’m nothing of worth fucking hurt. It was the first time I was with someone since...him and it ended up hurting me again and I swore I would never let my heart get hurt again and...and--”

You pause. Breathe.

“And then there’s what I’m putting Yunho through simply by being here with San, all because I wanted to escape my problems and feelings again. I can barely even do my job right because I can’t get a straight answer out of him--or any of the others because they’re tight-knit and won’t betray San like that even if it is to shit-talk his ex.”

Not even Wooyoung, who you seemed to have the most rapport with out of the three boys. You tried getting information out of them over the few days San was avoiding you (and admittedly you, him) from the initial bathroom confrontation, but each of them were tight-lipped and you knew without them having to say that San told them to remain that way about the subject.

More waves of fatigue wash over you, and you lift your legs up and rest your forehead on your knees. “And the worst part is, is that San cares about me in a way no one has. At least, not in the same sense you guys do. And it feels different but my brain is telling me it’s the same honey trap all over again. I’m holding myself back from opening up to him, which is the smart move all things considering, but some part of me wants to open up to him and that scares me so damn much.”

Mingi doesn’t interrupt even as you pause again, knowing you well enough to be able to tell when you’ve finished talking and when you’re taking a moment to find the truest words to string together even if it sometimes doesn’t make sense when it is translated from your mind.

“Last night, he came to me and told me that if I wanted answers out of him, I would have to hear why he didn’t want to tell me then tell him why he should tell me.” You sigh. “Mingi, he knows about what they did to Yunho--or at least snippets of what his dad did to him. I’m sure he knows that I know that too because I made the stupid fucking decision to ask about Yunho specifically. He said he didn’t want me near people like that...”

Isaac’s presence filled the silence but neither of you mentioned it.

“He asked me to tell him why I needed to know...and I just...couldn’t. It wasn’t my place and we both kind of shut down on each other and for some fucking reason, it hurt a bit. I just...” You let out another heavy breath. “I don’t know. It feels so messy.”

A beat or two passes before he exhales. “Okay. Yeah, that is pretty fuckin’ heavy.” You smile, breathing out a little amused laugh. “But that’s okay, Y/N. None of this shit ever comes easily.

“First and foremost, before we touch any of that other shit you just said, you need to get it through to your head that you are in absolutely no way, shape, or form, the reason why all this is being dredged up again. You of all people know how the past has a nasty way of catching up to us, and Yunho was going to have to face it sooner or later. Yes, the fact that you’re with San means that it did come sooner, but that doesn’t make it bad whatsoever.

“Yunho has his own demons and we can’t protect him forever, no matter how much we want to. If anything, this couldn’t have come at a better time. Our future isn’t exactly secure in the field we work in so at least it’s coming now when we are all here to support him through his problems and help him grow. But remember, we’re not powerless kids anymore. Yunho knows that too, he’s just trying to get his brain up to speed with it in his own way.”

You want to protest that you can do more, but the words die on your tongue as you tell our brain that Mingi is right. Yunho has to work through his own demons, and you being there to baby him through the process would be more counter-productive than anything.

Mingi clears his throat. “You’re stubborn and a major empath, so I dunno if any of that stuck.”

You smile faintly. “I’m trying to make it.”

“Good. Now, onto the whole spaghetti of emotions you’re having about San and relationships.” He sighs, “you weren’t wrong when you said it was messy. But don’t think for a second that it’s not supposed to be. Your hearts been stomped on to high heaven so I don’t blame you one bit for not wanting to give San a chance.” You open your mouth to protest but he already hears the fight coming and cuts it out of the roots, “I know we joked about you falling for San at the beginning and you have this whole aversion to the concept of ‘love’ so for arguments sake, we’ll just say you like him and chalk this situation as Fate being the bitch that it is.”

He hesitates for a moment. “I was actually planning on telling you this later, when you had finally come to terms with your own feelings about the whole Dominic thing but it seems like you did that already--which, by the way, I am very proud of you. Even if it did come out as a part of an emotional explosion since you have a horrible habit of bottling everything in until you’re bursting at the seems.”

“Thanks,” your tone is deadpan with an underlying tone of amusement to it.

“No problem. Anyway, Seonghwa made Yeosang and I do some more research into San--he was doing all this fancy computer wizard shit again and I did some incognito spy shit--and he really doesn’t seem that bad of a person. I mean, yeah, he’s got as much blood on his hands as the next mobster but he just seems to be a nice person? Again, relative to him being part of the mafia world. So if you wanted to open up to him... I mean, I don’t see why not.”

“He could have that side to him, the one he doesn’t show to everyone. He could hurt me.”

“Y/N, don’t take this the wrong way... but that will always be a possibility with anyone you meet--be it a potential friend or partner or whatever. You learn from the pain and mistakes, and recognise the signs more easily if you see them again so you don’t get hurt as badly as the last time. You left Dominic when he cheated on you, recognising that as one of the signs that he didn’t care for you as you wanted him to. You learned from the last time. And what did you learn from Dominic that you’ll keep an eye out for?”

You don’t realise that the tears had stopped until they started again at his gentle tone and careful words. This time, slower. “I wasn’t as important to him as his ego and reputation was. He was very different to how he was in public and how he was in private,” you sniffled, recalling all the times he would try to seem Big and Masculine in from of his friends often at your expense.

It happened on your way to Jeju, when you were struggling with the luggage and he was chatting to his friends about how he was going on a casual holiday, forgetting that it was supposed to be a birthday trip for you and Mingi. Even at the birthday dinner, he tried to make a speech that fed his ego as the Good Boyfriend at the expense of one of the most important people in your life.

“The point is, you can’t be so afraid of being hurt again that you shut everyone out. That’s a painfully slow death you’ll be experiencing. You live, you hurt, you learn, you move on. What did Auntie L/N always say when we were being angsty kids?”

You mouth quirked at the memory of your mother. “Let the negative emotions come, let them teach you, but never let them overstay.” God, you missed her.

“Yeah. You’ve got that wise woman gene from her. Maybe rather than only using it for others, use it for yourself too.”

Sniffles filled in the silence as you let that sink in, silently promising yourself that you would try to do that. That you would try to be kinder to yourself.

“As for the Yunho shit in relation to San...trust your gut. You know what to say and what not to.”

“Okay,” you mumble, feeling another tsunami of fatigue wash over you again now that this is all off your chest. “You said you did some spy shit? Are you Seoul right now?”

“Damn, I was planning on surprising you. Just a few towns over, actually, but still in Choi territory.”

“What if I speak to San? About letting you come here to visit me? I don’t think he’d say no.”

He thinks for a second. “Hm, well I’m gonna see you anyway so you might as well see if you can get a less fun way too I suppose.”

This time your chuckle comes out stronger and once Mingi feels like you’re in a decent mental state, he lets you end the call.

Any second-in-command worth their salt would be attuned to their leader and able to take over the heavy lifting when it was beginning to get too much for them. And Hongjoong was priceless so it didn’t take much for him to sense San’s off mood. He was not as sharp today, was not as focused as he usually was and that was strange in and of itself.

San was always great at compartmentalising and separating his work and personal affairs so they did not bleed into one another--which was a fucking feat considering most of the men in these circles lived and breathed their work life (not a very healthy thing to do) and also the fact that San used to date Jeong Dae who came from a very powerful family in their own right.

There was only one being who could frazzle this impenetrable man.

Wooyoung and Jongho had spent the most time with you and so had begun to take a liking to you--then again, the what they considered to be a nice partner was a line down all the way in the ninth circle of hell after their experience with Dae.

More than anything, he was frustrated because you do seem like a nice person--stuffed full of secrets that you hold tightly to your chest more so than the average person--but he cared more for San’s heath and right now, he looked fucking terrible.

He knew that if the other man got a whiff of how Hongjoong was trying to take care of him, he would get annoyed from being treated like a child. Would try that much harder to take on more of the work. Years of having to deal with him taught him the fine art of how to manipulate the stubborn ass into looking after his own wellbeing but being willing to share some of the workload.

But even masters of craft come along a new situation they are unsure of how to handle once in a while.

“San?”

“Yeah,” he mumbles absentmindedly, staring at sheets of paper the blue-haired man knows for a fact is reading two-three times over just to get the words to make sense to him through the foggy lethargic haze clouding his brain. Could see it in his eyes.

“Did you get any sleep last night?”

He takes in a deep breathe. “Uh... not much. Couldn’t sleep.”

“How come?”

“Just...couldn’t.”

He hums in response, not taking his eyes of the sheets in from of him. “I think we both know that’s a lie.”

San slaps his own documents onto his desk, rubbing his eyes in frustration. “Then what do you want me to say? Do you want me to open up and talk about my feelings?”

Hongjoong presses his lips in to a thin line. “That’d be a start...” When he feels San’s growing agitation, he finally looks up at him. “You don’t have to go into detail about anything if you don’t wanna, but dude, you can’t just pretend whatever is on your mind isn’t, ya know?”

His words don’t seem to persuade him to talk, at least he thinks they don’t when the other man picks up the closest sheet of paper next to him...and then throws it back down and sits in a huff back in his chair. “She just... she just won’t open up to me. Like, I’m trying so hard here and there’s that barrier between us. Last night,” his tone softens a little as the memory washed over him, “it seemed like things were shifting. Like she was starting to let me in.”

He take a few seconds to calm the growing irritation he felt. “I extended an olive branch and when it was her turn, she just...shut me out again. I mean, I suppose she tried to offer an alternative by letting me stay with her--” he ignored the other’s raised brows “--but it wasn’t the same.”

Even with the holes and lack of your side of the story, Hongjoong had an idea of the whole situation. “Right, I can’t believe what I’m about to say but...are you sure she’s not totally at fault for that?” He notices the look he sends him. “Okay, hear me out. Imagine you’re in her shoes and some rando just up and kidnapped you. No matter how nicely you treat her, she isn’t going to bare the deepest parts of her soul to you after a few weeks. She’s not trusting, like she’s a... like a...”

He tried to find the right analogy, right at the tip of his tongue, but San beat him to it with a quiet answer. “Like a wounded animal.”

“Uh... Yeah. I think. She’s got that vibe about her, that she’s been hurt before and so keeps herself closed off. And maybe you need to think about yourself too. With what we do, you’re going to have to keep secrets from her--you are keeping secrets from her by being cryptic and not willing to answer her questions. I mean, you’re not entirely wrong for not wanting to tell her about the Jeongs, but do you really think she would want to give up any of those pieces of herself she holds so close to her chest to someone who won’t fully do the same for her?”

Hongjoong has a strong sense you’re a lot more intelligent than what you make yourself seem, but he doesn’t say that. “I don’t know what to do or how to fix your situation--only you and Y/N can do that--but you should at least see her side of things too. And maybe just take it a bit easy when you’re this annoyed because you’re not getting much done and that’s pissing you off even more.”

“...Geez, dude. Okay.” San rubs his hands over his face and sighs. “Okay. Yeah. I’ll, uh... are you good with handling this?”

“It’s literally my job.”

“Alright,” he huffs in amusement, then stands up to gather his coat and phone, ready to call his driver to take him back to the apartment. “Oh, and--”

Hongjoong cuts him off without looking back at him. “Yeah, everything’s ready at home. I’ll let the house staff know that we’re coming back this weekend and to make sure it’s all perfect.”

San smiles at him in gratitude. “What would I do without you?”

“Not a damn thing, that’s for sure.”

Yeah, Hongjoong doesn’t need to be told if he’s a good Second. He damn well knows it from the grateful look in his best friend’s eye. That’s enough for him

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[sillytaetime]

J.JK~ Back in time

Desc:// Since graduating high school, you started a part-time job at a cafe. One day during your shift, your high school bully comes in but he’s HOT.

Warnings:// Slight angst, enemies to lovers, fluff

Pairings:// Bully!Jk x Nerdy!reader

WC:// 892

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I’ve never had any boyfriends. In high school, I was kind of seen as the ugly duckling. I was called names, pushed around, and told I wasn’t good enough. It can’t get any worse than that, right? Wrong. Jeon Jungkook made it worse. He was the school’s bully. He turned into a really big jerk after his crush turned him down for being too ugly. In a sense, I felt bad for him. 

I don’t know why i was the one he chose to target, but I was the chosen one, I guess. 

Jungkook gave me many nicknames from freshman year to senior year. His favorite ones were cow, fuckface, and oxygen thief. Over time I grew immune to his insults. Did I believe every word he said? Yeah, but it no longer hurt the way it did freshman year.

I guess it became a kind of feud between us. I started fighting back junior year. 

“Hey fuckface.” “Hey puddle shit.” “Damn, a new nickname? It’s like you never stop thinking about me.” He had a point, I dwell trying to come up with new things to say to him in my free time. “Anyways, too bad we only have 1 month left with each other till we graduate.” You were very aware of this. You’ve been counting down the days till graduation, when you’d no longer have to look this shit stain in the face. 

~ 1 year after graduation ~

Since my high school graduation, i started working at a cafe that’s about a block away from my apartment and 2 blocks away from my college. It pays decent. I’m saving up to be able to get a car. My parents don’t have the money to lend me anything so I’m working to support myself all on my own and I have been since the day I turned 18. 

Maybe the reason I was bullied so much was because my parents never made much. I often had to wear clothes more than once in a week without washing it, my socks had holes in them, and my shoes were practically falling apart but at least I had 2 loving parents who did their best.

Today, I work a really long shift. I have to open the cafe and close up. About 10 hours into my shift, a very hot but familiar man walks through the door and up to my register. “Hey, I’ll get a caramel macchiato, please” “Coming right up, that’ll be $6.25″ The man pays and goes and sits by the window with his drink. 

Everyone had left, except for this guy. I was getting ready to close up, so I walked over to where he had sat these last 2 hours. “Hey, we’re getting ready to close up for the night...” “Oh, right. Sorry, I must have lost track of time.” He looks at me and his jaw drops. “Y/N?” He knows my name?? “Do I know you?” He seems kind of surprised that you don’t remember him. He was so hot I definitely would’ve remembered him. “It’s Jeon Jungkook from high school.” 

Oh, holy fuck. Since when was the Jeon Jungkook this hot? “It’s been a while, how have you been?” “I’ve been well. Mostly studying for my classes.” “Well, look at who’s the nerd now.” I laugh. He laughs too. “Would you maybe want to go for a walk in the park and catch up?” I nod and start making my way towards the door.

Why would i turn him down? I don’t really hold grudges against people, high school is high school. Sure, he was a jerk, but I wasn’t nice to him either.

For about half an hour, we just walked in silence, enjoying the sunset until he spoke up. “Listen, I feel really bad about how I treated you in high school.” “It’s ok, i didn’t treat you well either.” “No, it’s not ok. I deserved every name you called me. You never deserved that. I got my feelings hurt and I just immediately started treated you badly because I was embarrassed you didn’t like me back.” 

Wait... Was I the girl? “What do you mean I didn’t like you back?” “I left those flowers and note in your locker, and you threw them away. Remember?” Oh shit. I thought that was a practical joke and that no one actually liked me. “Oh my god, i feel so bad now.” “Don’t, it taught me a lot.” “Really?” “Yeah, it taught me that if i really want something I need to go up and do it myself instead of just leaving a stupid note.” “I guess that’s a pretty valuable lesson.” “Yeah, I’m really glad i ran into you actually, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you.” 

He stops walking and turns to me. “I can’t live my life regretting the way I told you in high school, so I want to ask you out properly.” This is not happening... I can’t believe I’m about to be asked out by my high school bully. “Would you like to go on a date with me, Y/N?” “Yes.”

I could see his eyes light up. I guess everyone has the thing they truly want, this is his. Who knows what could come from this, but I’m willing to give it a try.

[hollywoodxwhore]

Ours | Chapter Twelve

Colson x Presley (Original Female Character)

Synopsis: Presley and Colson fell in love accidentally, but they were meant to be. Now that all the obstacles have been removed, they're moving in together in LA. Now, they have all the time in the world for Colson to teach Presley all of the things he knows. This fic is the sequel to Mine, which can be found in my masterlist!

Warnings/Content: ANGST (it's going to get worse after this chapter so please check content warnings), swearing, depression, col over reacting, col & presley arguing, mentions of domestic abuse, MF being a dumb asshole

Colson

I’ve been walking around like a zombie for the past three weeks.

I feel terrible about it. I should be celebrating our album, celebrating the fact that I’m married, celebrating my birthday that passed by weeks ago, but I can’t. April turned into May and as the weather warms and the days get longer, I just can’t pull myself out of this hole. 

I barely talk to anyone, even Presley. She’s understanding and kind and patient but I know how much it hurts her. We fall asleep together most nights but we haven’t had sex since before Megan’s post came out. I miss her, of course I do. 

I find her in the kitchen, finishing up dinner, and before she notices me, I take a second to watch her. She looks like she’s lost some weight from her already thin frame. Her hair is in a messy claw clip and she wears sweats and a giant t-shirt. Come to think of it, she’s been acting depressed, too. Probably because her husband has turned into a depressed lump whom half the world hates. Maybe half the world is dramatic, but it feels like it.

I haven’t been on social media and I’ve only been replying to those closest to me. Even then, my replies are few and far between. I can only imagine what’s being said about me. My lawyer told me Megan was forced to delete her post, but it’s not like it matters. Everyone already saw it. Everyone already drew their own conclusions. 

As Presley turns around to place our bowls on the island, she spots me. She straightens up a little and her face, a mask of misery and exhaustion, transforms into a weak smile. She’s trying so hard for me but I can tell she’s also feeling broken. I imagine I’d feel the same way if she was going through something painful. I sigh and walk over to her. She turns to look up at me and I slide my arms around her waist, pulling her in.

“Col,” she murmurs, nuzzling her face against my neck. I say nothing. I stand there and hold my wife, trying my best to draw strength from her. But nothing is better and everything is fucked up and I’m so scared. I just need Presley. I need to be close to her, to forget the rest of the world. 

I bend to scoop her up and her legs go easily around my waist. I settle her on the island and press my forehead to hers, my hands sliding over her thighs. “Pres,” I say roughly. Her hand delicately rests on my cheek. “I’m sorry I haven’t been myself.”

“Colson,” Presley tries, shaking her head, but I continue.

“It’s not fair for me to shut you out. I just don’t have anything productive to say,” I mutter.

“Talking about your feelings isn’t unproductive, Col,” Presley gently points out. “I just want you to tell me what you’re feeling. What you’re thinking.”

“I’m…I’m fucking scared,” I say haltingly, like the words don’t want to come out. “I don’t know what this is going to mean for my career. It could kill me, Pres.”

Presley chews her lip. “Quite honestly, there are a ton of abusive men in Hollywood and they’re pretty much all forgiven.”

My brow furrows. “But I’m not an abuser,” I say tightly.

“No, Col, I know that,” Presley says, shaking her head. “I didn’t mean–”

I push away from her, shaking my head. “Don’t even compare me to those assholes,” I say, anger and fear rising in my chest. 

Presley’s eyes widen as she hops down from the counter. “Colson, I’m not–”

“You fucking believe her, don’t you?” I scoff, frowning deeply at my wife. 

“Colson, you’re–”

“Nah, that’s fucking cute, Presley,” I say shortly, tearing a hand through my hair. “Thought you of all people had my back.”

“Colson, stop!” Presley pleads, crossing her arms protectively across her chest.

“Let me guess, you’re going to ask for a divorce soon,” I scoff. I know I’m being unreasonable, but I don’t want to be blindsided again. If she’s going to leave, I need to be prepared for it.

“Stop. You just want to hurt your own feelings,” Presley shoots back, her eyes narrowing. “You know I don’t feel that way.”

“Maybe you fucking do, though,” I mutter, and Presley explodes.

“Oh, fuck off!” she snaps, her eyes wide and fierce with anger. “I’ve been nothing but supportive and patient and sweet to you. I don’t force you to talk. I don’t tell you what to do. And now you want to put shit on me?”

“Presley,” I say, heart sinking. 

She shakes her head, holding a hand up. “You can wallow in your own fucking misery by yourself tonight,” she says. “I’m going to Cash’s.” With that, she abandons the kitchen and takes the stairs two at a time up to our room. 

Panic rises within me and I want to follow her but I feel frozen in place. She comes downstairs a few minutes later. I open my mouth to speak but nothing comes out. Presley slips into a pair of slides, shoulders her bag, and slams out of the house. 

And now, I’m completely alone. 

Presley

I wake up at Cash’s place the next morning with my eyes so swollen I can barely open them.

I don’t let Colson see how much this all impacts me because he’s the one really dealing with it. I’m just the wife. But I’m also the one who sees what’s being said on social media. I’m the one that interacts most with Jason, Colson’s lawyer. I’m the one who responds to texts from friends and emails about interviews. I don’t think Colson has any idea how much I’ve been doing since this all happened.

I’m completely exhausted. I miss my husband. I miss how things were just a month ago, before Megan ruined everything. She can’t stand seeing Colson happy with someone else. I see it for exactly what it is, but too many people still see Megan as this sexy, perfect woman and how dare MGK even breathe the same air as her! 

I hate her, and I don’t hate people. Usually, I’m pretty indifferent to anyone I don’t know. I’m protective of those I love, but I’m pretty good at just brushing people off. But I actually hate Megan. The fact that she’s making allegations like this for attention, for revenge on Colson for not taking her back when she was the one who hurt him in the first place. Colson is right – he’ll probably never come back from allegations like this. 

Jason is at a standstill with things; Megan’s lawyer isn’t very communicative, but I wake up with a strong feeling that I have to do something about this and very fucking soon. I stare at the ceiling for a long time, fingers twitching. “Fuck it,” I mutter, snatching my phone off the nightstand. Do not disturb is still on, so I ignore any notifications and scroll down, finding her original text to me. I type up the message and stare at it for three minutes before I finally hit send. 

There. Can’t take it back now.

It’s raining as I navigate LA traffic, hoodie pulled over my head. I must look wild right now, no makeup, messy hair, sweats and a hoodie. Slides on my feet. But I don’t give a fuck. This ends today. 

I send a text to announce my arrival and the gate slowly creeps open. It gives me some satisfaction that her house is smaller than ours and nowhere near as nice or unique. I park in front of the garage and walk up to the front door. I should be nervous but I’m not. I’m angry. I’m motivated. She doesn’t get to do this.

Before I even walk up the steps, the door is open. Megan stands there, one hand curled around the door, her long nails like talons. It’s funny – I used to have such a crush on Megan Fox. She was that girl-next-door kind of sexy, a little daring in the things she’d say but still coy enough. But up close, it’s clear just how much surgery she’s gotten done, and it doesn’t suit her. She can do whatever she wants; anyone can. But that doesn’t mean it looks good.

We nod at each other and I step inside as she moves out of my way. “Shoes off, please,” she says, and I leave my slides by the door. I follow her into a stark white dining room area. It’s the exact opposite of comfortable here. How does anyone live like this? 

“Have a seat,” Megan says, gesturing to one of the stiff chairs. I need to play this the right way, so I do as I’m told. She goes to the other side of the table and has a seat, slowly pushing her long hair off her shoulder. Her eyes find mine and she regards me for a second. Then, she smirks. “Colson has a type.”

“I don’t think he does,” I say, unable to help myself. “Where you’re a cold, vindictive bitch, I’m actually nice and I care about him.”

Megan snickers, quirking a brow. “Good to know you have some bite to you, Presley,” she says. “Why did you want to come here?”

“I thought we could have tea and girl talk,” I say, cocking my head to the side. “Why do you think I’m here, Megan?” I’m trying to keep it together, but now that I’m across the table from her, my anger is an entity in the room with us. 

She smirks but then it fades. She’s an actress but not a very good one. She’s trying so hard to look broken and sad but I see right fucking through it. “Has he hit you yet?” she asks.

“Cut the bullshit,” I say, tone clipped. “You and I both know Colson never laid a hand on you.”

“Oh, he laid hands on me several times, if you catch what I’m saying,” she says, that smirk reappearing. “Does he tell you you’re the most stunning woman he’s ever seen while he fucks you?” She leans forward, pressing her huge, fake breasts up. “He once told me I have the nicest body of any woman he’s been with. Has he said that to you?”

She’s trying to hurt me. She’s trying to get me to snap. This is what she does. I absolutely refuse to give into her games.

“So you’re saying any time he touched you, it was consensual,” I say.

Megan rolls her eyes. “Of course. You guys are all idiots,” she says. “Colson can posture all he wants but you know he’d never hurt a fly. But it’s so easy to get people to believe it. He has a reputation, after all. Aren’t you quite a bit younger than he is?”

“And aren’t you ten-plus years older than me and trying to scare me?” I shoot back. There it is – a tiny crack in the persona. A flicker of insecurity. It empowers me. “Why can’t you just let us be happy? You didn’t even want him. You left him, remember?”

Megan leans back, crossing her arms. “And now I want him back,” she says, eyes burning into mine.

“Do you think this is the way to get him back?” I ask, incredulous. “Holy shit. That’s so sad.”

“Don’t do that,” she says, a sour look taking over her features. “Don’t try to make me feel pathetic. It won’t work.”

“You need to admit that Colson never hurt you. Or his lawyer is going to sue you for everything you fucking have,” I say coldly.

“So what?” Megan snorts. “He can go right ahead. What’s done is done. No one will ever forget that I put that post out there.” She shrugs.

“But he never hit you. He never physically assaulted you,” I say.

“Of course he didn’t,” Megan scoffs. “Like I said, he was a pussy.”

My nostrils flare in anger but I’m almost done. “I want you to admit it,” I mutter. “To me.”

“Really?” Megan says, a grin broadening on her face. “You want me to admit that Colson never hurt me? He didn’t. In fact, I hit him. Several times. He deserved it.” Another crack in the exterior. A cold, desolate anger that I’ve never seen in anyone else before. This woman is fucking scary. 

“You’re sick,” I say, getting to my feet. “Leave us the fuck alone.”

“We’ll see about that,” Megan says from where she sits. I slip into my shoes and leave. 

As soon as I get in the car, I stop the audio recording, a smile growing slowly on my face. I toggle to the end of the recording, stopping it right before her confession. I got it. I fucking got it.

This ends now.

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