#i made sure to check in w/ you on several occasions just to make sure this wouldnt happen and it happens ANYWAYS

[queercatboyrights]

Me: Hey! if I give you a written schedule of my school days in advance, could you make sure not to schedule me these 3 specific days so I can actually go to my classes?

Scheduling Manager: Oh, yeah definitely! we can do that!

Scheduling Manager: *Ends up scheduling me several shifts on days I need to be in class anyways*

Me: >:/

[wolfiesmoon]

Chocolate-covered strawberries

riddle x gn!reader

have u ever wanted to have a (totally definitely platonic with no romantic feelings involved, wdym? *wink wink*) sleepover w riddle? bcs if so, you might wanna read this

thanks to @chillpanda36 's plant related encouragement i am once again riddleposting (hope u dont mind being tagged ＞︿＜)

I kinda got carried away and wrote waaaaay more than I thought i would

"Wow, your room is so... swanky." you commented upon entering his room for the first time. It was decorated in checkerboard patterns and heart motifs, which was very fitting for the dorm of Heartslabyul.

You never expected him to actually agree when you jokingly suggested a sleepover, but you're definitely not complaining.

"Thank you. It was modeled after the Queen of Hearts' castle and has mostly stayed the same throughout the dorm's history. I only made a few adjustments to have it be better suited to me." he explained. Clearly, he took good care of the place since it looked very clean and organised.

"By the way, you won't collar me if I happen to break any of your weird rules by accident, will you?" you were still somewhat worried you'd have to sleep with that uncomfy collar around your neck.

"I will excuse you from the rules, just this once. But do not call the rules 'weird', as it is quite disrespectful to do so." he crossed his arms.

Well, atleast you're glad about that.

You placed down the little bag of stuff you brought with you just for this occasion. You got so excited you ended up planning out several activities for you and Riddle to do.

But first, you have pyjamas to change into! Riddle graciously offered to let you change in his bathroom. Even in there, everything is super clean and organised, almost to a scary degree. Somehow, you get the feeling that Riddle doesn't really know how to "have fun". In a 'casually messing around with firends' kinda way.

After changing into your pyjamas, you call out to Riddle to make sure he's done changing as well. Once he confirms he has, you exit his bathroom to find Riddle in an oversized, frilly pair of white pjyamas, the kind you'd find people wearing in the medieval times. Oh. My. God.

"Pffft.... You-" you had to pause to hold back from laughing. "You look like a starving victorian child." you couldn't help but point out the silly resemblance. The pjyamas brought the whole look together.

"I haven't the slightest clue what a victorian child is, but I am certainly not starving. Why must you constantly insult me with such strange phrases?" Oh, it makes sense he wouldn't get the comparison. And even if he did, you feel like he wouldn't be very amused.

"They aren't insults. Just little comparisons." You smiled innocently at him. While they are just comparisons in a sense, they are usually meant to rile him up a little bit. You just can't help but banter with anyone and everyone sometimes.

Riddle felt a slight shiver run down his spine since you reminded him of a certain someone who likes comparing people to sea creatures at that moment. Though your lovely smile didn't resemble his creepy grin at all.

Lovely... smile? What is he even thinking about right now?

"Are you... good? You're making a weird face." your voice snapped him out of it and he assured you he was perfectly fine. No cause for concern.

"You might not be starving, but are you in the mood for a little snack?" you tried your best to sound enticing, like you're mass advertising the little surprise you brought along with you.

"The rules state that-"

"I double-checked the dorm rules, don't worry. And I also know you don't like junk food, so I made sure my snack is on the healthier side. Sorry for interrupting you, by the way." you laughed awkwardly at his offended pout. But you weren't going to lie, his angry face wasn't intimidating or scary at all (atleast not right now). It gives off more of an 'angry little kitten' vibe to you. But you already made one silly comparison tonight so you feel like Riddle might appreciate this one even less.

"Well then. I'd like to know what it is." he actually seemed pretty interested in what you came up with. You dug around your bag, pulling out a packet of chocolate-covered strawberries.

"Feast your eyes on these bad boys!" the specific choice of chocolate-covered strawberries was a calculated one on your end. You had asked Trey about Riddle's food preferences before, but it was unrelated to this sleepover. You can only thank your past self (and Trey) for arming you with the valuable knowledge that Riddle likes strawberry tarts (and consequently strawberries, you hope).

"Oh. I suppose these look quite tasty." he was actually really pleasantly surprised about your choice of snack. It's surprisingly fit to his tastes.

How thoughtful of you...

"Here, have one!" you actually made homemade chocolate just for these. Trey gave you a good baking lesson on how to do that. So of course, you want him to be the first one to try!

He hesitates for a moment. Although the food you're giving him doesn't break any of the Queen's rules, it still feels off to be eating so late at night. Scheduled meals are so ingrained into his mind that he feels the sudden urge to reject the offer and go brush his teeth immediately.

But something strange blooms in his heart when he sees the excitement in your gaze and he submits, telling himself he'll do it just this once. For you.

He grabs one of the strawberries from the packet, slowly and hesitantly raising it to his mouth as if it were forbidden to eat. It still felt forbidden, no matter how many times he told himself it was fine to let loose sometimes.

"It's... delicious." he comments upon eating the entire strawberry.

"Oh, goodie! I was worried I messed up the chocolate, somehow." his eyes went slightly wide upon hearing that you made part of them yourself. He felt his chest tighten up slighly. In a good way.

"In that case, I shall have some more. And you eat them too, since you prepared them for this occasion." the two of you sat down on the edge of his bed, placing the strawberries in between you so you could both easily reach for them while talking.

You still made sure you swallowed the food before you talked though. To avoid a scolding about proper manners from Riddle.

"So, for this sleepover I was thinking we could try summoning a demon, playing board games, doing karaoke, watching a movie, playing 'would you rather', making a pillow fort, and-"

"What was that first one?" Riddle had never experienced a sleepover before, so he had no clue what people actually did in them but he always just imagined sleepovers were purely sleeping at eachother's houses, not doing anything BUT that. He could barely keep up with all of the things you were listing off, but the first one ESPECIALLY stumped him.

"Summoning a demon? Everyone tries that in sleepovers. Usually doesn't work." you shrugged casually, reaching for another strawberry.

"How... horrific. And utterly nonsensical. What joy do you get from doing something so horrible? Especially if you know it won't work?" he seemed genuinely stumped by the concept, which made you want to laugh but you held back since you didn't want to choke on a chocolate-covered strawberry. It would certainly be a way to go.

"It's about the thrill, Riddle. What if it actually works this time? You never know...." you whisper teasingly, like a narrarator in a horror movie.

"In that case, we are absolutely not doing that." he hates to admit it, but he's actually kind of worried a silly ritual might workmand is taking precautions right now to not let it happen at all.

"Hahaha, that's fine! We can do all the other stuff, then." you decided to take mercy on him after seeing how hard he's trying not to let it show that he's scared of demon summoning games. He reminds you of your friends on your first sleepover when you tried summoning a demon. All of you were acting tough and unbothered back then, but were deathly afraid and unable to sleep after.

When you reached for another strawberry, you just happened to grab Riddle's hand instead. Seems you were both going for the same one. Actually, that one's the final one!

"Oops... you go ahead and take it. I feel like I've had enough." you smiled awkwardly at him. Gosh, is it suddenly slightly hotter in here or is it just you?

"Thank you." Riddle looked away, turning his head so you wouldn't see his reddening face as he ate the final strawberry. He's kinda mad at himself for getting so flustered over an accidental hand hold. Your hand felt so... nice to hold. It would be so nice if he could hold it more often. Gah, what on earth is he thinking?! None of this is rational...

An awkward silence fills the room.

And you get a cheeky little idea.

You picked up a pillow from his bed and threw it at the back of his head.

"Hey. What do you think you are doing-HHMMF!" you threw another pillow, this time directly at his face as he turned around to scold you.

"PILLOW FIGHT!" you yelled out excitedly, already grabbing another pillow to defend yourself with as you scurried on the other side of his bed. You giggled at the way his entire face flushed red with anger.

"That was no fair! I was not prepared at all!" you totally caught Riddle off guard, but now he was prepared to have his revenge. He never had a pillow fight before, but if little kids are capable of having one, so is he. And he is quite confident that his magical abilities will give him the upper hand against you.

"Even if you were, I'd still win! They called me the pillow fight champion back in my world!" you throw a pillow at him, which he stops with his magic.

"Oh, we'll see about that. You've had quite enough of landing hits on me, I believe." he smirked confidently at you, feeling a childlike excitement running through his veins.

Now that he thinks about it, it has been a long long time since he has felt this excited and relaxed. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad to do this over and over and over again.

In moderation.

[p-artsypants]

Paint it Black (6) Wondering

Robin disappeared three months ago. Now, Jump City's crime rate is mysteriously being taken care of by a normal, albeit strange, teenage boy who goes by the name Black. As the Titans befriend this lunatic, they begin to see a correlation between him and their missing leader. Will they be able to find Robin, or will Black turn them all insane as himself? [Actually, does not contain an OC]

Ao3 | FF.net

Starfire flew solemnly over the city. In her own selfish way, she wasn’t really patrolling, just going through the motions. She’d finish up with this, and then go home and—

What? Watch those videos again? Go through that torture, again? 

Maybe she’d check in on Black, make sure he was asleep and not causing any trouble. 

It was a horrible feeling living in her head. 

She had come to see Black as a friend. A friend with a great need for care. But the way he had spoken to her on top of the Wayne building the other night…maybe he was a murderer?

The very thought made her lose altitude quickly. 

She thought of Robin’s smile and that one time he said she was really cool and regained her place in the sky. 

“Star…fire?” A gravelly voice called out for her. 

“Hello?”

“Ov…over here, love.” 

Starfire turned about, before finding the source. An old man was duct taped to a scaffolding on a building under construction. 

“Mr. Mad Mod? Is that you?” 

“Correct, love!” Then he coughed. He had no youth to preserve him, and looked sick. Very sick. “I know we haven’t seen…eye to eye on many things…” 

“You have hypnotized my friends and I on numerous occasions.” 

“Yes…well, do you think you could help me?” 

“In what way?”

He coughed again, more severely. “I was doing something bad, yes. I had some revenge planned, and then…that boy…” He coughed. “A boy in all black ambushed me. Didn’t even have the chance to protect meself.”

“Black, you say?” 

“That’s the stuff! He tied me up ‘ere two days ago. I thought someone would have been ‘ere by now, but you’re the first to find me.” He gave her a pained smile. “Been without me medicine for a few hours. If you want to turn me into the bobbies if you can, but I might need to get to hospital.” 

“Oh!” Starfire immediately got to work freeing the man, and he collapsed into a coughing fit soon after. “Please hang on, Mr. Mod, I shall get you to the hospital as quickly as I can.” 

“Thank you, ducky.” 

— 

Robin. Black tossed and turned as that name reverberated in his head over and over. Robin. Who was he, anyway? He saw his picture, he knew his roles, and saw the respect his friends had for him. But still, who was this person? And why did his name make Black so angry?

Robin. A stranger. Robin. A phobia. Robin. An enemy.

Black saw no point in sleeping anymore that night. Sure, the bed was comfortable, and sure, the tower was warm and dry. To date, it was the most comfortable night he ever had (to his knowledge). But the more he slept, the more he dreamt. And the more he dreamt, the more memories came back.

As Black rose, he made the bed lent to him, he wondered why only bad memories came to him. People dying, crying, bleeding. Pain, sorrow...things you tend to try to forget first we're coming back first.

He also wondered how he knew how to make the bed. He hadn’t ever owned one, that he remembered. Getting undressed was a struggle, and he had done that at least twice before. 

It was the middle of the night, still dark in the tower. He snuck out of his room. His eyes were keen to the dark, but the light glow from the numbers on the appliances in the kitchen helped a bit.

Black's reasoning was, the Titans had taken him in out of the kindness of their hearts, the least he could do is keep from being a burden.

A rather sane thought, don't you think?

First though, since he was up and all alone, he decided to take care of himself. If he was staying here, he had to know what he was working with. His coat was still hanging up in the ops room, slightly damp. That was fine, as long as the contents were dry. He dug through the pockets, finding everything still there, and wrapped in the plastic he used to protect it. His knife, his gun, and his stash. 

He HAD to have his stash. 

He squirreled these things back into his new room, hiding them under the mattress. He allowed himself a tiny taste, just to take the edge off. 

Next, he allowed himself a tour of the tower. Some rooms he explored more than others; such as the medical room. He found the bathrooms, the garage, and the evidence room. He took a waltz through the basement. 

For each of the bedrooms, he took time to acknowledge whose was where. With Raven's, he poked his head in, saw the shadows and left. In Beast Boy's, he stepped in, got a whiff, and backtracked quickly. Cyborg's room was a bit more fun. Black tiptoed in, noticing the gauge on his computer. The tin man was charged up to 80% according to his screen.

Black tinkered with some of the tools sitting on the workbench, but when one dropped and made a loud clang, he bolted from the room.

Next was Starfire's. The boy peeped his head in the room, and when he saw no machines or demonic statues, and smelled no tofu armpit barf, he slid in. He liked Starfire for that; a comforting sort of normalcy in the tower. Ironically, the most normal room belonged to the alien. He acknowledged her lacey white curtains, and the random stuffed animals around the room. But he was most interested in her, moreover, how she slept. Her feet on her pillow and her hair draping over the end of the bed.

"I wonder if that's comfortable," He mused.

She stirred.

Black hushed himself. He stared at her a bit longer and then moved on.

Finally, his bedroom exploration ended with Robin's room. He stood in front of the door for a long time, trying to find the will to open the door. But he had nothing. He couldn’t do it. Nothing was stopping him. He didn’t even respect this stranger. 

In the end, he just went back to his room, and hummed some forgotten tunes until dawn broke. 

Morning rolled around with Raven first to wake up. She walked in the ops room, only to be utterly surprised. She expected the house guest to be still asleep, not cooking breakfast.

"Good morning, Blackbird!"

"Raven," she corrected.

"But ravens don't sing in the dead of night."

"And neither do I," She quipped.

"Fair. Coffee?"

"I'll stick to tea."

Next, in came Cyborg. "Dude, what's that smell?"

"Bacon, eggs, ham, fat, grease...what do you want?"

"You made all of this?"

"Well, it didn't poop out of thin air!"

"Just as a heads up, Beast Boy doesn't eat meat, remember?"

"That's why I made the tofu French toast from the fridge."

“I thought you didn’t eat processed meat either,” said Raven. “What is ham and bacon, then?"

“Well, if I prepared it, and it’s in its package…I wasn’t really going to eat it anyways. I found some yogurt.”

Beast Boy grunted and shuffled into the room. "'Mornin'"

"Yo BB! Black made breakfast, and it is awesome!"

"Off the hizzy," Black corrected.

Last to enter was Starfire, and she looked bedraggled. 

“Good morning, Princess Fiona! Would you like some breakfast?” 

Starfire leveled a glare at him. “You did something very horrible to Mr. Mad Mod.” 

The rest of the team stopped what they were doing and stared at the two. 

Black chuckled nervously, “I’m sure I have no clue what you’re talking about.” 

“The very old villain who is sometimes not very old and speaks with a strange accent.” 

“British,” Cyborg added. 

“Yes! Him! I patrolled last night and found him tied up within a construction site. He said he had been there for several days without access to his medication. I spent several hours in the hospital with him last night just to make sure he was healthy!” 

“Wow Star,” said Beast Boy, impressed. “That was nice of you.” 

“I didn’t know he’d be there for so long. I thought they would find him.”

“‘They’?” Raven pressed.

“The workers.” 

“But it is the week’s end! Would the builders not be off until Monday?” 

“Oh. Yeah…I didn’t think about that.” 

Cyborg scowled. “That’s your problem, man! You don’t think! Not when you fought against Mumbo, not when you took off your pants! What’s wrong with you?” 

Something is very wrong with you. We might have to operate.

“There’s…there’s nothing wrong with me,” Black insisted. “I’m fine. I’m the normal one!” 

“You know that’s not true,” said Raven, coming closer. “Starfire told us about your mood swings. You’ve been following us for a while. You seem all nice and friendly when you know we’re looking, but you’re up to something. That’s not normal.” 

He looked at Starfire, a grimace pulling on his lips. “You told them?”

“We do not have secrets,” Starfire argued. “Robin hid secrets from us, and that is how he disappeared. I chose to not withhold information.” 

Black frowned hard, his nostrils flaring. 

“Dude, we don’t have to be against each other. You can get in on the trust circle. Just don’t hide stuff from us. Let us help you.”

Now you’re all alone, and no one to save you. 

“I…” he backed away from them all. “I don’t know…there’s so much I don’t know.” 

“Then just tell us what you do know,” Raven insisted. 

Before they could pry any information out of him, the alarm sounded. 

“Looks like our little pow-wow is going to take a back seat,” Cyborg checked the report on his computer. “Ugh, Johnny Rancid.” 

“I can help!” Said Black, running to grab his coat.

“Oh, no you don’t.” Raven encased him in her magic and deposited on the couch. “You’re grounded.” 

“Grounded?! Why!?”

“One, we were just talking about trust. Two, you’re injured. And three, you don’t know how to fight in our dynamic. So sit.” 

“We shall return shortly, Black.” 

“Fine, whatever,” he pouted, arms crossed. 

“Titans Go!” Cyborg shouted as they ran out of the room. 

When they left, Black wandered over to the computer, where the report of this ‘Johnny Rancid’ came in. The location popped up and blinked at him.

There was a funny voice yelling in his head. Sitting around and doing nothing was the wrong thing to do. 

So he embraced it. 

Raven and Starfire raced through the air while Cyborg and Beast Boy chased in the car. Rancid had a motorcycle, and what looked like a long electric whip. On his back he had a large duffle, stuffed with money he’d just stolen from the bank. 

“Go ahead and try to stop me, losers! You were nothing with the little Birdy Boy, and now you’re even less!” 

Starfire threw bolts at him, and at the road, which he expertly dodged. Then, without looking at the road, snapped the whip at her, zapping her and making her collide with Raven. 

“Ah ha ha! Too easy!” 

“Not that easy!” Cyborg took aim with his canon from the driver’s seat. 

Rancid simply took a sharp turn down an alley, where the car couldn’t follow. 

Beast Boy escaped the passenger seat and turned into a cheetah, taking chase. He caught up to Rancid, running at full speed. 

Rancid cared little, and snapped the whip out again, several times, eventually striking Beast Boy. 

“Nothing! Nothing I say!” Rancid laughed.

The rev of a motorcycle caught Rancid’s ears, and he perked up in interest. “Bird Boy?” 

The R-Cycle came recklessly speeding around the corner, on a collision course with Rancid. But instead of a yellow and black cape billowing behind it, there was a tattered trench coat. 

“A new challenger? Rock on!” Johnny changed direction quickly, and the race began again. 

Starfire and Raven followed the revving engines to the source, only to look in dread. 

“He has taken Robin’s bike!” Starfire lamented. 

“And he’s not wearing a helmet!” Raven shouted. “Black! Go back home!” 

But Black couldn’t hear her over the roar of the engines, or the adrenaline pounding in his ears. 

Rancid drove straight into a construction site, where the path became treacherous and unpredictable. An expert biker would struggle. 

But Black seemed to be keeping up just fine. 

“You’re pretty good for a kid! Who’re you supposed to be? Bird Boy’s replacement?” 

“Nah, I’m your mom’s new boyfriend!” 

“What!” 

Black turned his bike to bump into Rancid, colliding their bikes together to try to shake him. 

“Watch it, punk! I just had this thing detailed!” 

“Could have fooled me! Looks like a rust bucket!” 

Rancid snarled as he returned the collison, and tried to shake Black off his bike. 

“Hey, what has webbed feet and quacks?” Black asked, with a meaty smile. 

“Uh, a duck?” 

“Good job!” And Black lifted off the bike to donkey kick Rancid in the face. 

Johnny lost control of his bike for a moment, swerving through the construction. 

Black brought his bike close and leapt onto Johnny’s, letting the R-Cycle crash behind him. 

“Get off!” 

“YEEEEE HAWWW!” Black reached over Johnny’s hands to engage the throttle, to speed up the bike even faster. Then he took out his knife and stabbed Rancid in the thigh, making it difficult for Johnny to brake.

Johnny cried out in pain, and Black bailed from the bike, rolling several painful feet. 

The crash that followed was startling. Johnny’s bike exploded as he collided with a wall. 

“Yes!” Black cheered, covered in road rash. 

Cyborg finally caught up to them. “Oh my god, oh my god!” He rushed to connect his cannon to a fire hydrant and put out the explosion. 

Raven arrived too, and yelled at Black, “stay put!” 

She and Cyborg worked to recover Johnny from the wreck while Starfire and Beast Boy caught up. 

“What did you do?” Beast Boy asked. 

“I won!” 

“It is not winning if the criminal is killed,” Starfire said woefully. 

“...killed?” 

Raven brought out Johnny’s bloodied, battered, and unconscious body. “He’s alive, but he needs to get to the hospital, ASAP.” Then she turned glowing eyes on Black. “What are you doing here? You were supposed to stay at the tower! That was an order!” 

“I said I wanted to help.” 

“You totaled Robin’s bike,” Cyborg said with venom. “We built it together. You had no right to take it.” 

“But—” 

“But nothing!” Cyborg shouted, getting right in his face. “This is what we were talking about! You don’t think! You don’t listen to us, you don’t consider risks! You’re lucky Rancid isn’t dead!” 

“You are lucky that you are not as well,” Starfire said, softly. 

Black blinked several times, finding it hard to swallow. Then, he started to cry. A few tears rolled down his face while his mouth quivered. 

The very action took the wind out of everyone’s sails. 

“Starfire, you take Black home and get him patched up. Cyborg, Beast Boy, you take care of Rancid, I’ll collect what’s left of Robin’s bike,” Raven stated, so coldly, it felt like ice formed at their feet. 

“Please Friend Black, do not resist. We will return to the tower.” 

Black nodded at her, still sobbing. 

She wrapped an arm around his waist, and they took off. 

—

In the med bay, Black sat in his underwear once again, while Starfire attempted to clean his road rash. He winced with each pass of the rag. 

“I am sorry if this pains you, but there is debris I must remove.” 

“I know, go ahead.” 

Starfire worked diligently, occasionally flicking out little pieces of asphalt from his wounds. “Why did you not obey Raven? Why did you fight?” 

Black was quiet for a while. “You asked me something similar in my hat. There was this…voice, screaming at me. I couldn’t sit around. I couldn’t ignore it.” 

“For everyone’s sake, I hope next time, you do.” 

His mouth scrunched up, and he blinked back tears. “I disappointed you.” 

“A little bit, yes. I had hoped that…since you asked us for the help, we would be on the same side. But it seems as if you are not. You are on your own side.” 

“I…I’m sorry.” 

Starfire looked up at him. His face wasn’t so deranged, his eyes held sadness instead of malice, and he seemed genuinely remorseful. “If you are, you should apologize to the others, and stop with these stunts of peril.”

He sighed. “For you, I will.”     

—

Raven couldn’t sleep. It had been an exhausting day, but her brain would just not turn off. Several nights since Robin’s disappearance, she would awaken with a start. She had a connection to Robin the others didn’t. She had been in his mind. She saw his memories. And she felt his presence. 

Cyborg seemed to be certain that he was dead, but determined to find a body to give a proper burial. Beast Boy seemed to fall more and more convinced that Black was the other boy in those videos, and that he had killed Robin before he lost his memories. Starfire? Well, she was always hoping for the best, but Raven wasn’t sure she actually believed. 

Like a pilot light in the basement of a house, the faintest whisper of a presence, even now, she felt it. Robin’s life. If he had died, she would have known. But it was there. Robin was alive, but only barely. Asleep? Magically sealed away? Hell, even banished to another dimension? She wasn’t sure. 

Which was why she was so troubled by the videos he had sent. As immoral as those conditions had been, they had been the work of men. Very evil men, but mere mortal men. Unless they were aligned with another being that hadn’t given a clue in the video, Robin’s presence should be stronger than it was. 

So not dead, but not alive. Somewhere in between. It made little sense. 

Giving up on rest, Raven got up and went to the ops room. 

The door opened quietly, so quietly, the other person in the room didn’t notice. 

“Beast Boy?” She asked. 

He morphed into a cat and leapt off the couch like a lightning bolt. Then he calmed and turned back. “Raven! You scared me!” 

“I have the tendency to do that. What are you doing up?” 

“Oh! I uh…I couldn’t sleep, so…I thought I’d watch some TV!” 

Raven peered up to the screen. He was watching the videos. 

“You won’t sleep better after watching those.” 

He shrank. “Yeah, I know…I just…” 

She came closer, watching again. Beast Boy had the volume low so as to not bother the rest of the tower. It was the third video, the longest.  

Beast Boy was quiet for a moment, then explained, more seriously than she’d ever heard, “I think Robin left this puzzle for me.” 

Raven met his eyes. “You do? Why?” It wasn’t dismissive, but genuine curiosity. 

“I know those songs. I just…don’t know what he’s trying to say.” 

“All of them? You recognize them all?” 

He shrugged. “Mostly. I don’t really listen to music for the words, more the…well, music. But they’re familiar.” 

“Explain.” 

He gave her his ipod. On the screen was a playlist called ‘Robin.’ “These are all the songs he gave me. He found out what music I liked and gave me a bunch of CDs to rip.” 

Raven scrolled through the list. “Beast Boy, all these songs are by the same band.” 

“Yeah, Radiohead. It’s his favorite.”

“One second!” She left to go to her room. When she returned, she had the list of lyrics she had copied down. “I don’t have all of them, but here’s what I got.” 

“Okay,” he scanned the list. “Uh, I think I need to listen to him sing them again before I can point out what is what.” 

“Alright. So we’re going to do this again. Would you like some tea?” 

“Uh…yeah. I think that’ll help.” 

So they both got to work. Beast Boy started from the beginning, listening closely. 

“The first video doesn’t have any songs,” he noted. 

“Right, but he gives us two pieces of information. There were twenty young men at the start of this, and Robin feared someone was listening to his recording, so he created a code.” 

“Ooohh…yeah. That makes sense.” 

“So the second video is the first one where he sings.” Raven pressed play, listening very carefully. 

“This is my way of saying goodbye. 'Cause I can't do it face to face. So I'm talking to you after it’s too late.”

“It’s just one song,” said Beast Boy. “Oh! It’s ‘Videotape’! Duh!” 

“So he’s ––what? Stating the obvious?” 

“I think this one is more about the words. I think he’s telling us…this is the last we’ll hear from him.” 

Raven frowned, but didn’t want to dwell on it. “What about the next one?” 

“That’s the one I was working on,” he held up his own notes in his messy handwriting. “The first song is ‘Last Flowers’ and then ‘We Suck Young Blood.’”

“Hmm. Keep going.” 

They restarted the video, and Beast Boy pointed out the parts where one song started, and another began. 

“She looks like the real thing. She tastes like the real thing. My fake plastic love.”

“‘Fake Plastic Trees’,” Beast Boy snapped his fingers as he wrote it down. 

“I've been climbing up this ladder. I've been wasting my time.”

“And that one is ‘Up on the Ladder’.” 

Raven frowned, starting to fear the worst. Robin was never very good at sharing emotions. Maybe, just maybe, he was just…using music to convey emotions he couldn’t explain? 

“Just 'cause you feel it doesn't mean it's there.”

“‘There There’.” 

No. Why record this many unless there was a point? Why subject them to the horrors in the background if he was just trying to say goodbye?

“You've got a light, you can feel it on your back, a light, you can feel it on your back. Jigsaw falling into place.”

“And then, obviously, ‘Jigsaw Falling into Place’.” He wrote the title down and showed her the list. 

“Jigsaw…like, a puzzle piece?” 

“I’d assume that’s what they were going for.” 

“Wait a second… ‘Last Flowers, We Suck Young Blood, Fake Plastic Tree, Up on the Ladder, There There, Jigsaw Falling Into Place’…Beast Boy! These are directions!!” 

“To where?”

Raven stared at it longer, begging the answer to hit her. 

“Oh! Raven! I forgot! ‘Last Flowers’ is the short name! The full name is ‘Last Flowers for the Hospital!” 

“Hospital!” She nearly shouted. “Blood, tree…I bet there’s something for us at the bio labs at the hospital! Let’s go!” 

“What, now?” 

“What is with all the noise?” A sweet, sleepy voice asked from the door. Starfire had emerged, one of Robin’s capes on her shoulders. 

“There’s been a break in the case,” said Raven.

“What case?”

“Robin’s case.” 

Starfire was wide awake. “Tell me everything!” 

“We will on the way, let’s wake up Cyborg!”

[j-graysonlibrary]

The Xiang Chronicles: Book One Chapter 10

Title: The Xiang Chronicles: Book One

Author: Jay Grayson

Word Count: 83k

Genres: Fantasy, adventure, drama, LGBT+

Available on: my website

Synopsis: Every few centuries a hero is born—one chosen by the God Tiandi to carry out his will in the mortal realm. The Xiang. Whether it is to quell a war instigated by the forces of shadow—of Shakti herself—or whether it is the miasma that poisons the world, the Xiang is born to bring the world back into balance.

Shu Pangu Min knows what his purpose is and he does his best to fulfill it even if he doesn’t fully understand all of the details. He must travel from city to city—lord to lord—to clear out the miasma. Along the way, he is to enlist the aid of four disciples. Each is to be of a different country and each must have high resonance and deep faith.

The holy men who raised him have great confidence in his future successes and they leave him to begin his journey on his own. But, can Pangu live up to the expectations of those around him? Can he really save the land like all other Xiang before him or will his unconventional methods doom them all?

Full chapter 10 under the cut

Chapter X

Just a little after dawn, the Xiang and his disciples met outside of Castelle, by the stable. Din Raime Cast had already sent money to the horse master so that the group could traverse through Kyrie more quickly. Since they would be traveling a different path that would be longer and more mountainous, the horses would be a great boon to them.

There was just one, small issue.

“I…do not know how to ride a horse,” Pangu admitted as he looked at the dark brown steed that had been assigned to him.

“You were never taught?” Raine asked, already in the saddle.

“I grew up on a small island. There were no pastures or fields to practice on,” he stated. Even if his teachers had brought a horse to the ruins—for whatever reason—there would have been no place to keep the animal.

“You can ride with me, Pangu,” Kira offered as he mounted his horse with ease. He then reached out his hand out to the Xiang.

“Or me,” Raine also commented.

“You are both large men but, Raine, you are too big for another to join you,” Pangu said and laughed a little. He would barely fit with Kira but it would be impossible with his first disciple.

Pangu’s teachers had all been tall, lean old men but he was close to their height. Kira was taller than him almost by a head and Raine was much taller. Most men in towns were around Pangu’s height with a lot of them being even shorter.

He mentally noted how he needed to make sure his next disciple was short to try and even the scales.

The saddle sharing situation was only slightly uncomfortable but Pangu hoped he would get used to it rather than it becoming a problem as they rode on.

Rather than taking the straight route that would lead them back to Liun, the group traveled on the north side of the country, headed south west.  Some of the towns were tucked into mountains and a few were even seeing heavy snow fall for the time of year.

The change in weather meant several changes of clothes which would definitely be disregarded by the time they reached Terra. Only the very north of the earth country was cold but most of it was mild and the south was downright hot and humid.

Thinking of the warmer temperatures ahead made Pangu able to brace through the cold of northern Kyrie. That and, of course, focusing on the job at hand.

Miasma wasn’t abundant in the small mountain towns except for a few, random occasions. Regardless of the amount, each stay in the town or city inn ended in Pangu’s dancing and Kira’s absorbing.

Kira had yet to show any signs of fatigue or poisoning but Pangu made sure to check on him often. Not only did he keep an eye on his spiritual body while they rode between towns but, after every ceremony, he would check in with him at the inn they stayed at.

The door to Pangu’s room closed, locking Raine outside. He knew the two weren’t aware that he was out in the hallway when they shut him out but he also knew he was more than likely not welcome inside.

Raine had started to notice after the third town on their trip that the two were having meetings that excluded him. At first, he assumed they were just talking. Maybe they believed Raine was already asleep in his room or they thought he would not want to talk about whatever the subject of their conversation was.

Once or twice would have been fine but it happened after every ceremony.

He had the urge to press his ear against the door but he was afraid of what he’d hear. His imagination was bad enough on the matter.

Pangu and Kira were both outspoken against those who talked ill of love between the same sex—as if it were the greatest sin. Raine had seen both the Xiang and Kira’s approach to the matter first hand. Pangu would explain how there is no proof in the texts that the law came from Tiandi himself while Kira would usually take a more…aggressive approach. In one town, the man had even told a woman that he would hump the back of her child’s head and infect him with his deviancy.

Raine would then watch as the two praised each other for their very different responses. He already knew that Kira had been in bed with men before—he did not hide the fact. But he was starting to wonder if Pangu felt the same way that Kira did.

He wondered if they were starting an affair.

The series of events made perfect sense. Pangu denounced that specific rule of Tiandi, Kira confessed his attractions, and they had been meeting up almost nightly ever since.

Raine wondered if he would be outcast by reminding Pangu that he was duty bound to not have a relationship as Xiang. Very few Xiang in the past were recorded as having lovers and each of them met a tragic end, usually an avoidable one that they may have seen coming if they hadn’t been distracted.

He frowned as he paced around in the woods outside of the inn. He considered his options and continuously worried if he would hurt the feelings of his friend. Kira would probably never speak to him again as well if he ruined this. He’d probably also make fun of him for being such a stickler for the rules.

Raine ran his fingers through his hair and then rested his back against a tree. He swore to himself that he didn’t find these types of relationships disgusting. He felt no distaste for Ryu and Sampra who were now happily together thanks to Pangu. But when he thought of Pangu with Kira it made his stomach twist for some reason.

He sighed and looked up at the stars and the moon. The cool light was exceptionally bright because of the full moon and he took advantage of that and retrieved the slip of paper he had tucked away in his belt.

It would calm him down or, at least, make him think about something else for a moment.

He unfolded the letter and his eyes scanned over it for probably the hundredth time. The neat script was, occasionally, smudged by the ink fingerprints that were intentionally stamped across the page.

“Raine,

We heard you had become a disciple of the Xiang! We are all so proud of you, myself especially. I always knew you would grow up to do exceptional things and I had assumed that your status as a solider would be the end of that story. But you really proved me wrong and reached out to the heavens.

I know you’ll do well.

Go out and save the world, we are all rooting for you. Do not forget what I taught you either. With kindness, there is strength and true strength is meaningless without compassion.

Love always,

Song Ranmu Sei”

Beside each of the fingerprints was the name of the child who had marked it. Raine smiled as he did every time he re-read the letter. He didn’t get to spend much time back in his old orphanage to see the new group of kids who were being brought up there but, any time he was stationed at or near the capital he had made an effort to visit.

He worried about what would happen to the place once Ranmu was gone. Though, now that he had more influence with the King, he could—perhaps—convince him to put a little more money into the establishment. Maybe he could even personally see to Ranmu’s replacement when the day came.

Raine folded the letter and placed it away before returning to the inn. He walked up the stairs, prepared to retire for bed when he saw the door to Pangu’s room open. There was no time to rush into his own room or flee back downstairs. He was stuck in the hall—frozen in place.

Kira walked out and noticed him instantly. They both paused but Kira moved first after a second. “Can’t sleep?”

“No…I went for a walk,” Raine answered with surprising control. His heart had leapt up into his throat so he didn’t think he could pull off such an even tone in his voice.

“Oh…alright. Well…” Kira cleared his throat. “I am going to bed.”

Raine nodded and watched as the man walked to his room. Before he could turn the handle on the door, Raine stepped forward. “Wait.”

“…Yes?” He removed his hand and turned to face him.

“What have you been doing in Pangu’s room so often since we left Castelle?” Raine cursed internally at his bluntness but also felt relief in simply asking.

“…Talking. Sometimes I give him a massage since the purification is so stressful on his body.”

“A massage?” he repeated, “This is not anything…indecent is it?

Kira’s jaw dropped before he laughed. “You think Pangu and I…? Raine, he’s the Xiang. He’s not allowed.” He crossed his arms in front of his chest and continued, “Besides, I am not interested in him that way. He is very cute and all but he is not my type.”

“But why all the secrecy?” Raine asked, “Why shut me out of it?”

The man shook his head and sighed. “Fine. I’ll be honest.” When Raine leaned forward, he said, “I’ve been having problems with my spiritual body. There are still energy blocks happening that Pangu thinks are…odd. And I’m having trouble with the meditating portion of the training. He didn’t want to say anything and embarrass me. That’s it.”

“You’re having troubles still?” Raine frowned and suddenly felt terrible about all of his suspicions.

“I am. It’s getting better but I guess my resonance is high but not very consistent,” Kira responded with a chuckle, “I knew I wouldn’t make a great disciple but Pangu doesn’t want to give up on me.”

“I…you are very powerful, Kira. I would not have guessed that was what you were doing.” He looked down to the floorboards. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t worry about it,” the man said and waved his hand, “If it had been me on the outside I might have thought the same thing. I am sketchy so I get it.”

“No,” Raine insisted and shook his head, “I was wrong to think such a thing. I truly apologize.”

Kira walked closer and poked a finger against his chest plate. “You are too nice. It is just wisdom to be wary of me, you know.”

“We are on the same side, Kira. I need to learn to trust you.”

“Well it isn’t the smartest choice, still, but I appreciate it.” Kira smiled and moved to place his hand, flat against his chest. “Don’t let Pangu know I told you, alright? He wants to help me keep this ‘secret’.”

Raine met his eyes and held the contact for some time, barely nodding his head in agreement. “Right…I won’t say anything.”

“Great.” The other man grinned and finally backed away. “Goodnight, Raine.”

“…Goodnight.”

Raine watched him walk into his room before returning to his bed as well. He shut the door, locked the hatch, and let out a long sigh. He rested his hand over his chest plate, where Kira’s hand had just been. It was still warm…

Knowing the truth did make him feel better though and the tension in his heart had started to ease some.

He removed his armor after a moment and set it to the side of the cot before sitting down and resting his head in his hands. Of course now, only in retrospect, he realized how silly it was for him to think the Xiang would abandon one of the key principles of his position. He wondered why he was so wound up in the first place.

His concern about Kira was still too strong. Raine reminded himself that he and the man were allies. Both disciples. Not only that but, after what he learned, Kira was clearly working hard to do his best in his new role.

He was just glad that Kira wasn’t holding his suspicions against him. He wasn’t sure he would have afforded him the same forgiveness if their positions had been switched. Putting aside his past deeds, Kira was a good person at heart. Pangu had seen it from the start and, more and more, Raine was beginning to see it too. 

[blu-joons]

DATING SEVENTEEN A⇴Z HEADCANON ⇴ Kim Mingyu

A ⇴ AFFECTION 

Being affectionate is something that Mingyu is big on, he loves cuddling you and keeping you close. His tall frame definitely works to his advantage as he can wrap you up and keep you, even when you want him to let you go.

B ⇴ BEFORE DATING 

You were minding your own business on a walk one day when you felt a guy crash into you. As you looked around, your eyes met a tall guy who was quick to apologise, guiding you across to a nearby store so he could buy you a new shirt once he noticed that his coffee cup had ruined the one that he was wearing.

C ⇴ CONFESSION 

Mingyu wasn’t shy of confidence when it came to confessing to you. He waited until you began to drop a few obvious hints to him to start planning out a confession. A lot of heart and thought went into it, Mingyu arranged a romantic day, and night, confessing to you right at the end of your evening. The whole day was more than you could have ever imagined from him, and a very reassuring sign that he was the one too.

D ⇴ DATES 

Your dates with Mingyu are always very sentimental and meaningful, he loves to do things that you would remember and recognise the heart that he put into each one. The way of doing this for him is usually through food, he enjoys cooking for you and spending a lot of time to make sure that he perfects the recipe exactly to your liking. Selfishly, Mingyu is also a massive foodie too so he will never turn down the opportunity to cook for himself whenever he has the chance to cook for you as well.

E ⇴ EXPERIENCE 

If Mingyu was going to fall in love, it was to be for the long run. As soon as he started dating you, he made it clear to you that he only wanted something serious. He knew his work demanded a lot from him, but there was always a part of him that wanted to experience love too. Whilst he knew he had quite a lot of attention from the fans, he was determined to make sure that you trusted in him before letting things get too serious, and also make sure that he was open with the fans to not upset or hurt them too.

F ⇴ FIGHTING 

He very much wore his heart on his sleeve, and fights were definitely included within that. Mingyu hated fighting with you, he wasn’t someone that was big on conflict despite his stature, out of the two of you, you coped a lot better than him. Mingyu would never usually say much in an argument, he’d stick around until you’d finished talking, and then try and find a solution as quickly as possible. The wait for an argument to resolve was the hardest part of it all, he couldn’t deal with the silence that came from you so he’d always try and sort things out just as quickly, if not quicker, than they fell apart.

G ⇴ GETTING TO KNOW HIS FAMILY 

His family were very important to Mingyu and it was crucial for him that you got along with them and that they liked you too. For your first meeting he went all out, he wanted to make sure that he impressed both you and his family and gave you the best setting to get to know each other for the very first time.

H ⇴ HOME 

Mingyu didn’t necessarily want to move out of the dorm, but he was keen on spending a lot of time at yours. He didn’t want to disturb Wonwoo too much by being in their room together, so you’d usually be respectful of him and spend a lot of time at your place, where you could also spend better time alone.

I ⇴ “I LOVE YOU” 

Mingyu was the first to say, ‘I love you,’ one night when he was sure that you were sleeping. You also felt as if you were dreaming when you heard his voice whisper into your ear, but when you asked the following morning if you were really dreaming, and he said no, you couldn’t help but say it back to him, making sure that he knew he wasn’t dreaming too.

J ⇴ JEALOUSY 

Whilst he liked to consider himself as someone who was confident and loud, Mingyu certainly had his moments when he’d get jealous too. There were times when he just couldn’t help himself but have to bite his tongue. Behind the noise, he was sensitive, if he saw another guy around you then it would definitely put his back up and put him on high alert. He was protective of you, and if he felt like he needed to step in, he’d usually use his height to assert his dominance into a situation and send a very clear message to whoever was trying to get to you.

K ⇴ KIDS 

Having kids is definitely something Mingyu looks forward to. He can’t wait for the day when there’s little ones running around who can match his energy and smile just as much as him. You also know that he’s very much a family man, as much as he loves performing, Mingyu has had several discussions with you where he’s told you how he hopes to be able to settle down one day, especially since you entered his life too.

L ⇴ LAUGHTER 

With such a positive outlook on so much, it’s impossible for Mingyu not to be laughing. He can find the humour in just about everything, even if it is absolutely terrible. Having him around with a big grin permanently on his face definitely helps to make you smile more often too. When you’re feeling down, he’s the best person to have around to cheer you up because he has such an infectious personality. Even if you’re at your lowest, Mingyu will work tirelessly to make sure that the smile is back on your face, whatever is troubling you, he’ll find a way to flip it around so you can try and look at it with a more positive and happier mindset.

M ⇴ MISSING 

He’s quite good at keeping his emotions to one side, thankfully Mingyu is quite an optimistic person so rather than focus on how long he’s been away from you, he’ll think about how there’s fewer days to being back with you. Having a glass half full attitude certainly helps Mingyu cope when he’s away from you. He’ll be constantly trying to keep his mind positive and looking forwards, and use that to also help you feel better when you’re having a bad day or really missing him. No matter how he’s feeling, he makes sure to keep the smile on his face both for the boys but also for you too so you can remember to smile as well.

N ⇴ NICKNAMES 

Mingyu is used to being the tall one, and so will often call you something like ‘little one,’ to remind you that he is not just tall, but he is the tallest of all of the members too, making sure to show his height off to you, and them.

O ⇴ OBSESSION 

He’s obsessed with your hair, especially when he’s nervous or down, Mingyu will love to play with your hair to try and distract himself from whatever it is that’s going on.

P ⇴ PDA 

Being affectionate in public isn’t something that Mingyu’s afraid of, he doesn’t care if people know that the two of you are together, but with that, he won’t force your affection in front of people. He’ll do whatever comes naturally to him and what he knows will keep you safe when you’re out with him.

Q ⇴ QUESTIONS 

You’ll often get asked if you have a couple of minutes to help Mingyu when he’s broken something or made a mess. Sometimes you’re convinced his clumsy streak has a curse against you with how often he ends up causing chaos for you to sort out.

R ⇴ RANDOM FACTS 

Mingyu was keen on his action figures and collectibles, and so one day decided to surprise you with an action figure of your own. It ended up being something that he kept with him a lot, especially if he was on the road. It almost became a good luck charm for him to keep in his pocket, even if you weren’t able to be there in person, then the figure would be your spirit cheering him on with everything that he did.

S ⇴ SEX 

Mingyu is incredibly romantic when it comes to sex, he loves to make you feel very loved and very safe in his tall frame. He enjoys taking his time with you and making sure that every occasion is special, he never wants to rush anything when it comes down to showing you how much he loves you. At times, he can be a bit of a tease, but around you, more often than not he turns into a complete softie as you’re his ultimate weakness.

T ⇴ TEXTS 

Messages from Mingyu will crop up a lot during the day, especially if he didn’t get to see you that morning. He’ll often just check in with you to see if you’re doing alright or enquire what your days like and if there’s time for him there.

U ⇴ UNIVERSE 

Together the two of you are very similar, you’re a bit of a walking cliche at times, finishing each other’s sentences or knowing exactly what the other will order off the menu, but that’s exactly why you’re your own favourite couple too.

V ⇴ VACATION 

You knew that Mingyu was a huge fan of Latin America, and so when a gap in his schedule finally appeared, you managed to organise the perfect trip that included all the things that you knew were on his bucket list. Somehow, you managed to keep it a complete secret from Mingyu until you ended up at the terminal.

W ⇴ WHINING 

It was hit and miss whether Mingyu would whine around you, if he was in a needy mood, he’d let you know about it that was one thing for certain.

X ⇴ XXXXX 

Kisses are a huge deal for Mingyu, he’s affection at the best of times, but especially with kisses. His favourite spot to kiss is definitely the top of your head, he loves to be able to lean over you and kiss into your hairline, or crane his body around so that he could reach your cheek whilst wrapping his arms tightly around your waist. Whenever you’re happy or sad, he’ll always be there with a kiss and some words of encouragement.

Y ⇴ YOU 

You were his teammate, the two of you took on the world together.

Z ⇴ ZZZ 

The two of you would often fall asleep intertwined, with Mingyu’s hands usually running through your hair. It was an unconscious habit of Mingyu’s, there was something so comforting him to be able to play with your hair when he rested.

---

Masterlist

[gubler-me-up]

Easy Work

Request: Hi. Could do a fic where reader is the last person the team suspect to be badass? She's the baby of the team. They're on a case, and she takes down an un-sub 3 times her weight and size, and arrests him all by herself. Spencer, who fancies her, is the most shocked, after Morgan and they all agree never to mess with the baby of the team again.

A/N: Thanks for the request, anon! I hope this is badass enough for you! I tried my best to make the reader as fierce as possible. Hope you enjoy it and it sparks your inner fighter 🤼‍♀️

Couple: Spencer Reid/Fem!reader

Category: Angst? Fluff? Angsty fluff?

Content warning: Mentions of violence, bones popping out, aggression

Word count: 2k

-------------

“Remember Thomas Wilson is most likely armed, so be careful where you go. Do your checks before entering any space he can possibly be hiding out in,” Hotch told the team.

All seven of you made your way to the SUV’s to go to the location Garcia had sent to your phones. It had been a week of nonstop tracking this guy and his actions only kept escalating. He was known for his firearm skills as he was military trained. From the picture and information Garcia found on him, he was a 6’5, 280 pounds and in good shape.

You hopped in the car with Morgan and Reid as Hotch, JJ, Emily and Rossi took the other SUV. You sat in the back while Morgan drove and Spencer was in the passenger seat. You usually rode with Hotch, but Morgan insisted you ride with him. He saw you as his little sister, so he didn’t want you to get hurt on his watch. You told him he should keep an eye on Reid over you in the field.

To be fair, the whole team saw you as a child to be protected. Being the youngest of the group was annoying when it came to being out on the field. Everyone felt as if they had to put their lives at risk to protect you even though you had reassured them on several occasions you could protect yourself. Even Garcia said she would go out of her way to beat an unsub up for you if need be and she wouldn’t even hurt a fly.

“Do you think he’s at this location?” You asked out of the blue.

“Well, Garcia picked up his phone signal there. If he’s not there and it’s a trap, we already have bomb squad on the way to detect if anything’s off,” Morgan answered.

You looked out the window into the night sky as you thought about Thomas Wilson’s profile. He was dishonourably discharged from the military after he physically assaulted his commander. This led him to want to take revenge on any ex-military higher-ups and their families. He had broken into three homes where he physically beat his commanders before ending their lives by one bullet hole through their skull. If their wife was there, he would shoot them execution-style.

Everything he did was organized and deliberate. It was out of character for him to have his phone on him or even a detectable signal. It was even stranger he would be out in no man’s land of Tennessee rather in Memphis where his murders took place.

“I think he’s setting us up for something bad,” Reid said.

“You think so too, right? Do you think this is his end game? Taking us down with him?” You asked.

“Well, we’re about to find out,” Morgan said.

As everyone drove down the dimly lit back roads to the location Garcia gave you, you still felt as if something wasn’t right. You looked out into the farmland into an abyss of never-ending darkness. You sighed out of frustration as you knew Wilson was up to something foul. Morgan heard your sigh and glimpsed at you from the rearview mirror.

“Calm down, Y/N. No need to feel scared,” he said.

“Scared? You think I’m scared of this guy?” You scoffed.

“A little, yeah. Don’t worry, Reid and I have your back,” he assured you.

You rolled your eyes. “I have my own back, but thanks for the offer.”

“Y/N I can pick you up with my pinky finger and not crack a sweat,” he joked.

“Keep joking like that and I’ll take a needle and pop both of your inflated biceps,” you snapped back.

“I think Y/N might be right about something being off,” Reid interrupted.

Morgan pulled into a long driveway leading up to an abandoned farmhouse. The other half of the team were already there along with the police officers who had trailed behind them. The bomb squad was there as well checking for any possible bombs he had planted. The team was scouring the area for any sign of Wilson, but it didn’t appear as if they were having any luck.

Morgan, Reid and you hopped out of the SUV, guns in one hand and flashlights in another as you walked up to the rest of the team. You made sure to be on high alert. There weren’t any lights passed the driveway, so it was the perfect set up for something out of the blue to happen.

You looked out into the fields as you tried to see if there was any movement. You felt someone touch your shoulder. You quickly turned around with your gun pointed to whoever was touching you. It was Reid behind you with a concerned look. You sighed as you lowered your gun.

“Spence, you can’t be sneaking up on me in the dark like this,” you said.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you. Just checking to make sure you’re okay,” he said.

“I’ll be okay when we catch this-”

“Everyone stand back!”

You and Reid turned to look over to the farmhouse. The bomb squad had opened the door and from what you could see was a man strapped to a chair. You squinted your eyes a bit to see what was strapped around him. As from what you could tell it was a bomb.

“I knew it,” you mumbled to yourself.

“What?” Reid asked.

“I knew this was a trap. He has to be somewhere close,” you said.

You looked off to your right side as you looked into the field again. You didn’t know why, but you started walking in that direction. You felt in your gut there was something or someone out there looking back at you.

“Y/N, where are you going?” Reid asked as he grabbed your arm.

You looked back at him. “He’s out there.”

He looked around to see where, but couldn’t see anything. He looked at you confused. You pulled your arm away from him as you continued your walk towards the darkness of the field.

“Don’t go out there by yourself,” he said.

You whipped your head around to look at him. “Well, are you gonna just stand there or follow me?”

“Let’s at least notify the team before w-”

“There’s a man with a bomb around him right now. We don’t have time to plan out a big manhunt. We just have to hunt.”

You turned back around and held your gun up with your flashlight below it. You picked up your pace as you went through the field. You could hear Reid’s footsteps behind you as he followed you closely.

“Hey, what are you guys doing?” You heard Hotch yell out.

You ignored him as you continued your journey through the fields. You knew you weren’t supposed to be doing this, but you felt useless just standing there waiting and hoping the bomb squad would deactivate the bomb. You soon heard someone running from behind you. You sighed out of frustration as you knew who it was.

You turned around to see Morgan sprinting towards you and Reid. He looked as if he was going to yell at you for straying from the group, but his concern over you overshadowed it. You rolled your eyes as you were getting tired of Morgan and everyone else on the team thinking you were incapable of anything.

“Y/N, you’re walking aimlessly into a field with no idea where this guy is? Is this what you learned during training?” He asked.

“I learned not to stand there and do nothing. He’s out there somewhere just watching us,” you said.

“Well, at least bring a couple of us along with you for extra precaution,” he said.

“I have Reid. Isn’t that enough?” You said.

“I just feel as if it’s best to have someone more physically capable with you two,” he said.

You scoffed. “Are you saying Reid and I aren’t physically capable to hold our own? That’s a bold statement to make.”

“Reid’s proved he can be physical when need be, but you? You’ve been in the field for a year and you’re a bit small, so it’s easy for you to be overpowered.”

“It’s easy for me to be overpowered? Derek, I can kick some serious a-”

Before your sentence could be completed there were shots fired from the direction you were going in. Reid immediately pushed you down as he and Morgan crouched down to the ground. You looked over to where the shots were coming from and you could see a dark figure running away. Your adrenaline raced through your body as you jumped up and started sprinting towards him.

“Y/N,” Morgan yelled.

His cry out for your name didn’t slow you down as you picked up the pace. He had stopped firing shots as soon as he knew you were chasing after him. It seemed as if he sucked at multitasking, so you had an advantage. His running and not looking back to shoot meant he was most likely not going to keep looking back.

You heard running coming from behind you and knew it was Morgan and Reid finally catching up to you. Men could be so slow sometimes. By the time you were close enough to Wilson, Morgan and Reid had finally caught up to your pace. They were just in time for your combative demonstration.

You jumped and kicked Wilson in the back of his right knee. He collapsed immediately, dropping his gun. You got on top of him, prepared for a struggle. He jerked his body to the right in an attempt to knock you off. You combated that by stringing your arm under his arm and your other arm stringing around his neck. You gripped your hands together to tighten your hold. You then planted your knee on his left elbow and jerked his body back.

He let out a screech in pain as you felt his elbow pop out from underneath your knee. You kept him in a tight chokehold. He made the mistake of trying to squirm out of it. You aggressively jerked your upper arm up and he let out a screen as you dislocated his shoulder. You then dug your knee in his lower back to make sure he stayed in place as you cuffed him. You reached into his pocket and took out his cellphone.

You shook your head. “This was your end game huh?”

“Y/N?”

You looked back to see Morgan standing there in shock. You don’t think you’ve ever seen him so speechless before. You looked over at Reid, who was never speechless, but he looked just as lost for words. They both walked over and helped you pick up Wilson, who yelled in anguish as they touched his arms.

You looked back to see Morgan standing there in shock. You don’t think you’ve ever seen him so speechless before. You looked over at Reid, who was never speechless, but he looked just as lost for words. They both walked over and helped you pick up Wilson, who yelled in anguish as they touched his arms.

“I think I got it from here. Y/N, I think you deserve a break from being a badass,” Morgan said.

“I told you I was capable,” you said.

“Sorry, for ever doubting you. I don’t think I’ll be messing with you for a long time after this,” he said.

You smiled as the three of you escorted Wilson back towards the farmhouse. As you reached, you found out the bomb had been deactivated. You handed over the cellphone to the bomb squad. You were going to go towards Hotch and the others as they talked to the man who was strapped in the chair. You couldn’t help feel as staring at you from behind. You turned around to see Reid looking at you with a different look than usual. He looked as if he was meeting you for the first time.

“You did great out there, Y/N,” he said.

“Hey, I may be little, but I do have the skills to get rough when need be,” you said.

“Remind me never to make you angry,” he said.

You smiled. “I could never hurt you. I’d only use my strength to protect you.”

“Even from Morgan?” He joked.

You walked up to him and gave him a pat on his forearm. “It would be my pleasure to protect you from Morgan.”

-----

Tagged: @shadyladyperfection​

MASTERLIST

[watchmegetobsessed]

And I always will - Tom Holland

❄️ FANFICmas 2020 ❄️

Read more about FANFICmas here!

week 3 babies! it’s been so long since i last wrote for Tom and this story just screamed for him when I made up the plot. so here is some cute friends to lovers christmas edition! updated the fanficmas post with next week’s fic and added another one for the 24th, check it out if you are interested!

word count: 4.2k

masterlist

It’s not a date, it’s not a date, it’s not a date!

That’s your mantra for the evening and the closer the time is coming when Tom is picking you up, the louder you’re shouting it in your mind. Well, while it was sure he was nowhere near your apartment you physically kept telling yourself, heart pounding in your chest with each passing moment, but when he texted you that he’d be there in five you shut yourself up.

Stepping to the mirror you take one last look at yourself in your simple black dress and red blazer, a simple but fitting look for the annual Christmas party of the company you’re working for. You tug your hair behind your ears to make your earrings more apparent, they are like little red Christmas ornaments, the perfect touch up for the occasion and you also happen to know Tom loves how you wear them around the holidays every year.

This whole thing started a week ago when he was over for a movie night, something you often did when he was in town and you whined about having to go to the company party alone again and listen to your boss comment on how she was already married at your age. She is a very old school woman with strong beliefs that a woman should be able to catch herself a man at an early age if she doesn’t want to end up alone for the rest of her life.

You were only twenty three, not at all in rush to settle down, but you hated the teasing and commenting every year. It happened all through the year, but it was the worst at the Christmas party, because then she had the time to talk to you without the distraction of work, so she was able to touch on more personal topics as well.

Tom listened to you patiently, letting you rage about the irritation even the thought brings to you every year before proposing his idea.

“I could go with you and pretend to be your boyfriend.”

The words rolled off his tongue so easily, like it was nothing at all, when in reality it put your stomach into a knot immediately. It might have not mean anything to him other than just a friendly request but it meant so much more to you, being in love with the man for years.

Cliché, right? Falling for your best friend and keeping your emotions bottled up because you’re too afraid to come clear and possibly ruin your friendship. It sounds like a horrible teen movie, but this is the truth. It’s not something you can just blurt out without having to overthink about all the possible outcomes that would send you into a rabbit hole of the worst case scenarios until you are scared to talk about your feelings for life.

You were hesitant about his idea, but like every time, he managed to talk your ears off and convince that it would be a great idea.

“Lots are already thinking we are a couple, it would be easy!” he assured you, and he gave you a sly, cocky smirk, one you can never resist. So naturally, you said yes at the end and that brings you to this evening, when you’re nervously waiting for him to arrive to pick you up so the two of you could go to that stupid party together, pretending to be a couple.

You keep pacing back and forth in the small hallway as you wait for him to arrive and when you hear the knock on the door you jump.

It’s not a date, Y/N! Just pretentious!

You keep telling yourself your little mantra as you stride over to the door and open it for him. And there he is, handsome as ever, wearing black dress pants and a nice, crispy looking white shirt under his wool coat, the top buttons of the shirt left undone to let your greedy eyes a little hint of his toned chest underneath the fabric. You need to stop yourself from sucking on your breath, he looks so great, not just now, but all the damn time, making you feel lightheaded with just a simple smile.

“You look beautiful, girlfriend,” he tells you, putting a teasing tone into the last word and though it was just a joke, it made your heart flutter for sure.

“Thank you, boyfriend,” you shyly smile, the word tastes so sweet on your tongue, but there’s some hidden pain behind it.

“Ready to go?” You nod and grab your coat and purse before shutting the door behind you and locking the door.

The ride is short, but feels like forever. You’re anxiously chewing on your bottom lip, heart pounding in your chest and you fear that Tom might hear it and question you about it. This is so nerve-wrecking, and so not how you imagined to be his girlfriend for the first time.

Though it’s the closest you’ll get to the title, probably, you tell yourself, stomach churning at the thought.

“Hey,” Tom’s soft voice grabs your attention when he stops at a red light. “Nervous?”

“Just a little,” you nod shortly. “I just… want to my boss to take me seriously for once,” you lie, because there’s absolutely no way you are telling him it’s him that makes you shit your panties.

“I’ll be right there with you and we’ll charm the shit out of that woman,” he smirks making you laugh at his words.

“Hope so,” you mumble with a sigh, turning back to stare out the window.

Tom parks down in an empty spot near the venue that holds the part and he helps you out of the car giving you a hand, but he doesn’t let go of it once you are standing on your feet, holding your hand and even lacing your fingers together. When he gives it a gentle squeeze you peek up at him and notice that he is looking down at your with a warm smile as if he is trying to tell you that it’s gonna be alright without words. You try to swallow your anxious thoughts and hope he doesn’t find your hand too sweaty as the two of you head inside.

You work for a huge marketing company, one of the biggest ones in London. You landed an assistant job two years ago, fresh out of college and worked yourself up to be a fulltime graphic designer, mostly working on visuals for smaller campaigns running in the company, but you were proud of your work and enjoyed it to the fullest. One of the lead designers is rumored to retire sometime next year and you were hoping to be considered for his spot, thought there are quite a lot who has been working there for a longer time, but you felt like you have proven yourself to be suitable for the job. Tonight you are praying to charm your boss so she would move your name forward in the process and earn you a few good points at the admission, but this meant that you have to make her believe you are the definition of couple goals so she would get off your back and finally see that you are trying your best to move forward in life.

The venue is one big ball room, several tables set on the sides with the department’s name on the table to let people know where to sit, the luxurious decoration making the whole place appear like Winter Wonderland straight out of a fairytale. There’s a stage at the very back with a DJ already playing and a dancefloor in the middle, some guests are busting their best dance moves there, while others are enjoying the open buffet that runs along the two sides, tables filled with the most delicious looking meals.

A waiter greets you both, offering you champagne and you gladly take a glass while Tom shakes his head with a soft “I’m driving, thank you”.

Looking around you see some familiar faces but there are a lot new ones. The company has a whole office building with five floors and one usually stays on their own floor throughout the working days, you don’t interact much, so it’s hard to tell who you are working with on a wider level.

“Do you know where we are sitting?” Tom asks leaning closer to your ear so you hear what he is saying over the music and as his hot breath hits your neck it sends a shiver down your spine.

He is so close and his hand feels so warm on mine, you think to yourself while your eyes scan the place, trying to find your colleagues. When you spot them you pull Tom in their direction, plastering a nervous smile on your lips.

“Hi everyone!” you greet them arriving to the big, circular table. You work with a team of ten designers, some of them are older, but there are two around your age. Sally is twenty-five, her desk is right across yours and you’ve become closer, eating lunch together almost every day, and then there’s Owen, who is basically the office’s gossip source, always knows what happened to who and he makes sure to give the word away to the right people. Your older colleagues find him nosy, but you think it’s funny how he can still get any information from anyone even though he is known to have a big mouth. There’s just something about a tall, gay dude who approaches you with a sly smile, it’s like he puts a spell on people and they magically start talking. He often joins you and Sally for lunch, the three of you forming a club of young, ambitious people, holding each other up so you don’t get crushed by the judgy thirties.

When Owen looks up from his cocktail he almost spits it out seeing Tom standing next to you, holding your hand firmly.

“Little miss Y/N?! What is this supposed to be?” he gasps dramatically and you just chuckle shaking your head at him.

“This, is my uhh—This is my boyfriend, Tom,” you nervously introduce him and he waves around politely.

“Hi, nice to meet you all,” he calls out and most just acknowledge him with a nod and a hello, but Owen is over the roof that you just appeared with Tom Holland by your side.

“Why haven’t you tell me you were fucking Spider-Man himself?” he continues to rage and you almost choke on your own saliva hearing his words. Your cheeks start to heat up, but seemingly Tom doesn’t feel as uncomfortable as you, he just chuckles lightly, before pulling out your seat to help you sit before he takes the seat next to you.

Sally, who is sitting between you and Owen just slaps his chest in a warning manner.

“Control yourself!” she scolds him, but it only earns her an eye-roll.

“I’m sorry, but I feel offended I didn’t know about this,” he explains pointing at you and Tom.

“I hope you understand that I like to keep my private life, well, private. So it’s my fault Y/N hasn’t been bragging about us.” Tom rescues you from making up some stupid lie and you’re happy you didn’t have to say a word, so you just chug down half of your champagne in hopes it would ease your nerves a little.

Surprisingly, Owen backs off immediately, giving you a knowing look, as if he understood so well the life of a well-known actor even though he was far from being one.

“Oh, totally. I get it, don’t worry about it, Tom. Though I’m sure she’s been dying to talk about you all along.”

“Has she?” Tom teasingly looks down at you and you just let out an awkward chuckle nodding.

“Yeah. Exactly,” you mumble finishing off your champagne and putting it to the table. Tom can easily tell how nervous you are, so he puts a hand to your knee under the table and gives it a gentle squeeze, leaving it there afterwards, but it just rises your anxiety level. You are highly aware of every touch and look, as if your senses became hypersensitive all of a sudden, but only to Tom.

“So how long you two have been together?” Sally asks with a warm smile, trying her best to steal the opportunity from Owen to talk so he doesn’t say anything inappropriate and you are endlessly thankful to her for that.

“Um, couple of months,” you say the first thing that comes to your mind and from the corner of your eye you see Tom just nod along your words.

“And how do you know each other if I might ask?”

“We’ve been friends for a long time, actually,” Tom speaks up this time. “Y/N’s dad used to work with my dad when we were younger and we sort of became friends. I was always in love with her, though it took me a long time to grow the balls to ask her out.” You are stunned at how easily he is talking about something that’s not real, as if he has been building up this story in his mind for a while, but that can’t be the case of it.

“Oh, this is so cute! And did you feel the same way?” Sally asks you. Licking your lips you glance over at Tom.

“Yeah. Loved him all along,” you softly say and it’s the truth, however he will probably never know about it.

“It’s like in the movies!” Sally gasps, holding her hand to her chest.

Tom’s eyes still hold yours and he gives your knee another squeeze that makes you take a deep breath before you tear your gaze away from him, feeling giddy and lightheaded.

You stay at the table a little longer before the two of you head to fill your plates before everything is fully gone. It’s kind of a relief to get away from Owen and Sally, you hated lying to them, but you had no choice.

“Everything alright?” Tom asks, brushing a hand against the small of your back as the two of you stand at the buffet, looking at the food.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” you nod with a weak smile. “Just a little nervous,” you admit.

“Don’t be, we are doing just fine,” he smirks and leaning down he kisses your forehead gently. It’s nothing new, he often does this and the gesture always manages to pull you out of your boiling thoughts and it has the same effect this time as well. You feel like you can breathe again after holding it in for a long time.

You carelessly glance over your shoulder as you wait for Tom to finish packing his plate up with veggies when you spot your boss talking to a guy who you recall works as an accountant on a higher level. Her eyes move just enough to meet yours and you suck on your breath when she spots Tom next to you, right when he reaches out mindlessly sliding a hand to your waist.

“Oh God, she saw us,” you mumble under your breath as you watch her excuse herself from the guy and head in your way.

“Hm? What?” Tom lifts his head and his eyes quickly find the tall, lean woman walking towards you with ambitious and confident steps. Mrs. Winston is the kind of woman that could easily intimidate any high power man in the industry, and she worked hard to be where she is now. However, you don’t necessarily always share her beliefs of the world and life, for instance her vision of a woman marrying a man as young as possible.

“Y/N? Who is this handsome man you brought tonight?” she asks right away, eyes landing on Tom who has put his plate to the table behind him and circled an arm around your waist. Before you could even get a word out, Tom extends his other hand out for her, with a charming smile.

“Tom Holland. It’s nice to meet you, Mrs. Winston. I’m Y/N’s boyfriend.”

Oh God, you’ll never get used to hearing him say that and you’re amazed he remembered her name even though you just mentioned it earlier.

“Nice to meet you too. Call me Carol,” she smiles, seemingly already loving Tom and honestly, you can’t blame her. “I saw that you were bringing a plus one, but I was expecting a relative,” she comments finally paying you a glance and you can feel the sharpness in it, how she partially meant it as an insult, but you just smile at her widely.

“Oh, no. Hope you don’t mind it.”

“Not at all. So tell me, why do you look so familiar, Tom?”

“I’m an actor, you might have seen me in movies.” It takes Mrs. Winston to put the picture together, but when she eventually does, she gives you a highly approving look.

“Well yes! Now I remember! I think my son in law is a big fan.”

“Give him my best wishes,” Tom nods with a warm smile.

“You know, I’m happy to see Y/N finally with a worthy man by her side. I always told her to grab herself a good one before she runs out of time,” Mrs. Winston starts her usual sermon.

“Oh, I think Y/N is perfect on her own, I think she is an amazing individual,” Tom replies and your and Mrs. Winston’s eyebrows rise at the same time. “I don’t think a woman needs a man by her side to make her complete and I admire her strength as a person on her own, not just in a relationship.”

“Don’t you think a woman needs the support of a man to succeed in this man dominated world we live in?”

“Not at all,” he shakes his head confidently and you feel him pull you closer to his side while you listen to his words curiously. “I think women deserve the recognition of them and their work and not to have it overshadowed by any men. I’m proud to be Y/N’s boyfriend and I’ll support her through everything, but I would never let anyone think of her as just a part of our relationship, or the person connected to me, because she is so much more than that and I want everyone to recognize that.”

You are at a loss of words, you knew Tom was a feminist, supporting women’s rights passionately, but you never heard him talk about it in a close relation with you. His words twisted your heart in the best possible way and though tonight is all about faking, something is telling you that these are his genuine thoughts, except the part about your relationship, but he could easily mean just your friendship under that.

Mrs. Winston seems stunned at the honest and forward answer, though you can tell it surprised her that someone went against her beliefs. However, it doesn’t seem like she is upset about it, more like she appreciates the balls that someone spoke up.

Her eyes fall back on you and there’s a small smile tugging at her red lips.

“He is a keeper, Y/N,” she simply tells you before walking away.

“Holy shit,” you breathe out when she is far away. Tom gives your waist another squeeze as he glances down at you with a smirk. “It’s like you put a spell on her!”

“I’m a charming bastard,” he shrugs smugly before grabbing his plate from the table and the two of you make your way back to the table.

Following the little talk with your boss you feel a lot more relaxed, knowing that Tom charmed the shit out of the woman. Now you are starting to enjoy the party, laughing with Sally and Owen and you’re happy to see that Tom is getting along with them pretty well too.

When the DJ starts playing All I Want For Christmas, the whole room cheers as one and most guests rush to the dance floor, that includes you and Tom as well.

He keeps you close, twirling you and moving around with you to the song, even singing it just like most people around you. Looking around you spot Mrs. Winston dancing as well, a lot more reserved than you, but she looks like she’s genuinely having a good time. She winks at you when your eyes meet and she sees Tom wrap an arm around your waist. You feel yourself blushing and you turn back to him, earning a sweet smile from him as he is enjoying the party.

When the song ends, the DJ slows it down a few knots playing Christmas Lights by Coldplay, people start to leave the dancefloor, only couple staying to slow dance to the song. Your eyes meet Tom and you thought he might want to go back to the table, but instead, his arms wrap around your waist and he pulls you to his chest, starting to sway to the rhythm.

You try to ignore the butterflies in your stomach as you feel his body pressed against yours, his hands holding your waist firmly, and you cheek is next to his, occasionally brushing in the motions. You run your hands up his broad shoulders and rest them behind his neck, a shiver running down your spine when you hear him sing the lines into your ear:

“Like some drunken Elvis singing, I go singing out of tune, saying how I always loved you darling and I always will.”

You lean back just enough to look into his eyes, feeling like the words he sang were a message addressed straight to you and you needed to see it in his look. When your gazes meet your heart skips a beat when they validate your thoughts. He sang those lines on purpose and he wanted you to hear them, but still, you can’t bring yourself to say or do something. You just stand there, wrapped in his arms, eyes lost in his, swaying gently to the song.

He brings a hand up to your face and tugs your hair behind your ears, his yes fall to your earring and he can’t help the smile that tugs on his lips.

“I don’t know if this is the right time, but I feel like it is,” he softly starts, seemingly having a hard time to find his words. “Y/N?”

“Yeah?” you breathe out faintly.

“I love you.”

The words almost push you out of your balance, and you feel like you are falling down in a deep, endless hole. He said the words you’ve been aching to hear from him for so long, he really said them and he is looking at you with eyes you’ve only seen in the mirror when you were thinking about telling him about your feelings. But this time the look belongs to him and he is breathlessly waiting for you to say something in return.

“I love you too,” you softly tell him, brushing your fingers gently along his jawline. He breaks a relieved smile, but then furrows his eyebrows in a serious expression.

“Just to make it sure, you are not talking about a friendly love, right?”

You can’t help but let out a chuckle, shaking your head at him.

“No. Not friendly,” you assure him and he sighs in relief again.

“Great, because it would have been really awkward.”

You bite into your bottom lip, shyly staring up at him, a little lost about what should be said or done next, when you hear Owen call out from behind you.

“You guys are standing under the mistletoe! Kiss!”

First you turn to look at him and then you follow the direction where he is pointing and you see that you are in fact standing under a little mistletoe, hanging from the ceiling. Turning to face Tom you shyly smile at him, while he looks way more confident in himself.

“We can’t break the rule,” he chuckles teasingly, making you laugh as well before leaning down he captures your lips in a sweet, breathtaking kiss.

You feel like a teenager again, the butterflies are going wild in your stomach and you’re pretty sure your hands are shaking, but you couldn’t care less. All you could think about is Tom and that you were finally kissing him. Teenage you would lose her mind knowing you finally got to kiss him, after all those years of secretly dreaming about it.

Tom kisses you again and again until you both are breathing heavily, so he pulls back a little, resting his forehead against yours, his hands keeping you close to him.

“Wanna get out of here?” he breathes out and you nod your head eagerly.

“Fuck yes,” you chuckle making him laugh as well before he grabs your hand and pulls you back to the table to grab your stuff and then head out.

You don’t bother to say goodbye, or tell anyone you’ve left, you were busy feeling Tom’s hands touching you wherever he could, his lips finding yours every other minute. You both are a hot mess in the car on the way home and when you finally reach your apartment, you turn on the Christmas lights in your room, before Tom pulls you down to the bed and makes love to you all through the night.

-

general/forever taglist for Tom Holland

i do separate taglists for different people, but not for different works of mine! if you ask to be on my Tom taglist, you’ll be tagged in all of my Tom fics!

@zaahidahhh @shawn-youth  @wildflower-cth @imaginashawnns @haute-shawn  @learning-howto-be-myselfx3 @cutepenguin1 @madatmendes @harrysleftchelseaboot  @sarcasticallywitty15 @dontworrysunflower​

if you’d like to be taken off or added to the list, please let me know!

[trulymadlysydney]

Somewhere In Time: Eleven

“...and when one of them meets the other half, the actual half of himself, whether he be a lover of youth or a lover of another sort, the pair are lost in an amazement of love and friendship and intimacy and one will not be out of the other's sight, as I may say, even for a moment...”

― Plato, The Symposium

tw: Death

Previous Chapters HERE

***Please Do Not Repost Without Permission***

April 25th, 2000, 12:06pm

It’s been a long, long few months for Roni.

Today is one of the first warm days New York has experienced in a while, and it’s one of the first times Roni has felt strong enough to actually leave her house without breaking down and sobbing.

Still, she’s aware she isn’t exactly at peak performance either.

Presently she finds herself at the supermarket, bare-faced and exhausted. She reaches up to rub at her eyes, which at this point burn permanently with how often she’s been crying over the past few months.  She’s sure she must look a mess as she walks through the building, searching numbly for the few items her grandmother had sent her for.

Her grandmother, sweet and more than mildly concerned for Roni’s well being, had thought it would be wise for Roni to get out of the house for a bit.  Over the past few months, Roni has gone on a few walks here and there, but each time she’d returned home looking more wilted and devastated than she had when she’d left.  It was disconcerting, to put it lightly, but of course the older woman had comforted Roni through every minute of it.

That being said, however, she’d wanted to push Roni to make the effort to get out of this funk (or at least up and over the hump that stood before her), and although it makes Roni feel strange and disgustingly vulnerable to be out here among other people like this, she can’t say she blames her grandmother for trying.

Besides, there’s something that’s been on her mind for ages now, and she thinks today is the perfect day for it.

She has to keep reminding herself to focus on the task at hand first and foremost-- although she can’t for the life of her remember if her grandmother needs 2 percent milk or skim--, because God knows she wants this grocery store trip to be over as soon as possible.

She runs a hand through her hair, realizing dismissively that it’s a bit greasy and overdue for a wash.  When was the last  time she took a shower?

Ultimately, Roni decides on skim milk (she figures her grandmother will forgive her if she’s wrong) and plops it unenthusiastically into the shopping basket that hangs heavy on her arm.  She scans the basket, mentally checking off everything she sees and searching her foggy brain to determine if she’s missed anything.

When she’s absolutely certain she’s gotten everything on her grandmother’s list, she takes in a deep breath, turning on her heel and walking--almost robotically-- to the next area of the store she needs to go to.

The little section of less-than-fresh flowers is located directly next to the produce section, right where it’s always been, and it’s a place that Roni has visited multiple times in her life since her mother’s passing.  The task of picking out the prettiest flowers is one that Roni has never taken lightly, of course, and this time is no exception.

Because this time, she isn’t going to visit the grave of her mother.  She’s going to find Harry’s.

There’s a pressure on her back mixed with a tinge of anxiety as she scans the colorful flowers in their colorful wrapping.  It would be doing Harry a disservice to pick some that are anything less than perfect, but then none of these seem suitable at all.

Roses? No, too dark. Violets? Ironic, but still no.

Roni is startled out of her thoughts when she hears someone behind her clear their throat.  Expecting to be asked to kindly move out of the way, she shifts quickly to the right,  preparing to offer whoever this person is an apologetic smile.

But then she hears her name.

When she turns she is met by none other than Oliver and his sweet, smiling face. Her heart sinks impossibly deeper into her stomach at the sight.

“Hey!” he greets, as pleasantly as he can manage.  “I thought that was you but I wasn’t sure!”

Oliver looks good, save perhaps for the dark circles under his eyes that mirror Roni’s own.  He seems far more well put together than Roni for sure, and she’s almost embarrassed by her own appearance. His dark hair hangs limp on his head, and the scent of his aftershave tells Roni that he’s probably just taken a shower before heading over here.  She wants to hug him, purely for selfish reasons, but she thinks maybe that isn’t the best idea right now given the circumstances.

He seems to feel the same way, because he holds his hands awkwardly at his side— as if wanting to go to her, but unsure of how to go about it.

So Roni simply smiles.  “Oliver,” she greets. “It’s so good to see you!”

And she does mean that. His face is an oddly comforting sight at a time like this.

“It’s good to see you, too, Ron! How have you been?” He asks this question quietly, as if he already knows the answer, but there isn’t a single trace of judgement on his face. That was something Roni had always loved about him, in fact.  He never judged.  He was always a much better person than she felt she could ever hope to be.

Still, it feels like a loaded question. One that she doesn’t quite feel prepared to answer in the slightest.  How does one explain to their ex boyfriend of several years that they’re doing absolutely terrible?

So she shrugs, offering him a half-hearted laugh.  “I mean, I’m here.”

Oliver laughs, a sympathetic smile on his face that tells her he feels the exact same way. A wordless sentiment is shared between the two in their smiles, and he nods when she giggles. “Same,” he says. “I’ve been better but… ya know.”

And god, Roni does know.

She gestures at him. “You look great.”

“Thank you! Been working out a lot. Changed my diet a bit. Just trying to be like, you know, healthier and stuff.”

Roni nods. “That’s amazing, Oliver.”

She really does mean it. He does look great, especially compared to the last time she’d seen him. Fresh out of their breakup, running on a maximum of three hours of sleep per night, wordlessly helping Roni pack up her things into boxes and moving them, along with her grandfather, back into her grandparents house.

The first few days of the new year had been awful, to say the least.  Roni had hardly spoken, hardly eaten, hardly done much at all except for cry; overwhelmed with sadness and a tinge of guilt— not only for leaving Harry, but for her sudden lack of feelings towards Oliver. And Oliver, the angel that he is, stood by her. Constantly worrying, making sure she was at least drinking enough water, and trying to coax her into telling him what was wrong.

The breakup had not gone at all the way Roni had expected. But then, when do breakups ever?

It was on the 6th day of January, when Roni found herself so completely buried in her grief that she couldn’t stop crying, even for five minutes, or bring herself to step foot out of her bed.  Oliver had tried everything, and was obviously growing impatient himself. When he threw his hands up and exasperatedly told Roni he was taking her to the hospital, that’s when she’d done it. She’d blurted out that she couldn’t be with him anymore.

The look on his face was enough to shatter what little bit of her heart remained intact in her chest.  He’d asked for clarification, then asked again, then again. When his tears started falling, that’s when the cycle of grief started for him. Denial, bargaining, anger.

Roni, of course, couldn’t tell him everything.  She couldn’t tell him about the time travel, and about Harry.  She couldn’t tell him anything, really.  All she could do was cry.

And cry she did.  She cried so hard she got sick, and poor Oliver, through his own tears, called Roni’s grandparents because he didn’t know what else to do. Even in the days that followed, where Roni stayed in the care of her grandparents, she couldn’t give him a straight  answer.  She wasn’t sure where she would even start, she only begged him to understand that this was the right answer for both of them.

And all the while, her heart had ached.  It had ached for her mother, and for Harry.  It flooded with overwhelming grief and guilt as Roni constantly wondered if she’d done the right thing leaving 1925.

It had taken a while, but it did get a bit easier after that.  Two weeks later, Roni and Oliver ended things-- officially-- both with clearer minds and hearts.  Oliver helped Roni’s grandfather move the rest of her things from her and Oliver’s shared apartment back into her grandparents’ home, and she and Oliver talked things through-- as best as they could.

The official reason Roni had given Oliver for their breakup was that she didn’t know who she was on her own and she needed to figure it out; which wasn’t a lie.  She had told him, in more or less words, that she was feeling misunderstood and needed to really find out who Veronica Elliot was.  After all, they’d been together for nearly ten years.  Ten years of her adult life in which she’d done so much growing up, but with him.  She needed to grow up on her own.

And Oliver had understood that as best he could.   It didn’t make the breakup hurt less by any means, but it made enough sense. All he wanted was for her to be happy, which she appreciated more than she could express.   So once she’d gotten settled in with her grandparents, she and Oliver hadn’t spoken again.

Until now.

Oliver nods his head in Roni’s general direction, bringing her from her thoughts.  “What’s the occasion?”  he asks.

“Hm?”

“You’re shopping for flowers,” Oliver explains with a laugh.  “For something good I hope!”

“Oh.”  It dawns on Roni that Oliver may actually be able to help her, or at least somewhat understand her current situation.  “Yeah.  Kind of.”  She shifts her weight to her other foot.  “Actually… Oliver, do you remember Mr. Styles?”

Oliver furrows his eyebrows.  “Who?”

“Mr. Styles.  You were assigned to spend time with him in high school.  Right before you graduated.”  None of this seems to ring a bell to Oliver, so Roni sighs.  “You knoooow,” she tries again.  “He gave you the advice?  About asking me out?  You brought me to meet him?”

Oliver’s confusion only seems to deepen.  He shakes his head.  “No, I don’t think--”

“He died like, shortly after I met him,” Roni says, growing a bit more impatient.  “You went to his funeral!”

“Roni,” Oliver says slowly,  “I think you’re confused.  I was assigned to Mrs. Brown. Mildred Brown. You met her, but there was no one named Mr. Styles.”  

Roni shakes her head. “No,” she says.  “No, that’s not true.”

“Yes it is,” Oliver insists, then chuckles.  “I would’ve remembered someone with a name that cool.”

“But Harry-- Mr. Styles… he--”

“I knew pretty much every resident in that place,” Oliver says.  “There was no one named Mr. Styles. At all.”

Roni lets out a breath, blinking as she tries to process exactly what Oliver is telling her. Of course there was a Mr. Styles. She remembers him vividly, both in his youth and in old age.  “No…” she says slowly.  “No, there definitely was.”

Oliver shakes his head.  “Roni, I’m not lying to you.  I knew everybody there.  There was nobody with that name.”  

Roni is only halfway listening to him as her thoughts run a million miles a minute.  “He… no, because...” She trails off, finally blinking confusedly up at Oliver.  “Are you sure?”

“Positive.”  Oliver watches her for a moment, eyebrows furrowed in confusion.  After a beat, he speaks again.  “You okay?”

“Yeah it’s just… I could’ve sworn--”

“Is that who you were planning on getting the flowers for?”  Oliver’s confusion continues to show on his face. “Why?”

“I just--”  Roni isn’t even sure where to begin.  She sighs.  “I just thought… he really meant a lot to you.  I wasn’t at the funeral.”

“You’re thinking of Mrs. Brown,” Oliver insists.  “I loved that woman.  But I haven’t thought of her in years.  I’m shocked you even remember her.”

“Apparently I don’t,” Roni jokes half-heartedly. Oliver laughs.

“Where did you come up with that name anyway? It doesn’t even sound remotely familiar.”

Roni, still confused, shakes her head. “I don’t know. I must have heard it in passing or… something.”

“Yeah probably.” Oliver nods towards the flowers. “Anyways. If you’re wanting to get some flowers for Mrs. Brown, she loved lilies.”

Roni glances back towards the cheap bouquets. Lilies. Those might be good.

Her confusion only fogs up her brain more than it already is, and try as she might to hide it, it projects very easily onto her face.  Oliver eyes her, as if wanting to touch her but unsure of whether or not he should.

“Are you sure you’re okay, Ron?”

“Yeah,” Roni says quickly, realizing she must look strange. “No, yeah, I’m good. Sorry. Just… brain fart I guess.”

Oliver chuckles. “I know how that goes. Had a ton of those the past couple months.  Things have just been like, weird? I guess? That’s the only way I can describe it.”

“I know,” Roni agrees, a tinge of guilt striking her chest. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be!” Oliver says quickly. “Seriously. I didn’t say that to like, make you feel bad or anything.  I’m just saying.”

The air is thick with tension all of a sudden, and Roni clears her throat, trying desperately to will it away. Oliver laughs awkwardly.

“Well I don’t want to keep you or anything. I’ll let you get back to your shopping.  But it was really good to see you.”

The way he’s smiling at her makes Roni instantly relax, and any awkward vibes in the air fizzle away. She smiles. “It was good to see you, too. Seriously.”

There’s a brief moment of charged energy between the two, before Oliver decides to just bite the bullet and move.  He reaches forward before Roni can really even process it and he wraps her up in a hug.

It feels ridiculously comforting in a way that Roni would have never expected, and she surprises herself when she feels her eyes grow misty.  She hadn’t realized how badly she’d needed a hug  just in general, and she definitely hadn’t thought the most comforting one would come from Oliver himself.   She relaxes into him, wrapping her arms around his torso and giving him a gentle squeeze in return.

They stay like this for a while, and Roni realizes that Oliver probably needs this just as badly as she does.  She feels him take a deep breath in through his nose, burying it in her hairline and sighing quietly under his breath.  He’s missed her.  And Roni can’t lie and she hasn’t missed him, it’s just different.

She can’t go back to him.  She absolutely cannot.

“Please take care of yourself,” Oliver mumbles, before finally pulling out of the hug.

“Hm?”

“Take care of yourself, Ron.  Go easy on yourself.  Please.”

His words touch Roni’s heart, and she smiles.  “Oh.  You too.”

He smiles right back at her, and there’s a long moment where she feels like he might say something else.  Ultimately he decides against it, and he nods in finality.  “Right,” he says.  “See ya.”

He’s gone before Roni has even finished saying her goodbye, and she’s left feeling empty and somewhat melancholy.  How is it possible to feel so simultaneously relieved, as if some unexpected closure has occurred between the two, and yet so hollow, as if far too many words were left unspoken?

Roni’s stomach churns and she clears her throat, trying to re-center herself.  

Flowers.  Harry’s grave.  Right.

She knows what Oliver just said, and it confuses her to no end, but she isn’t going to give up that easily.  She’s certainly not just going to take his word for it; she has to see for herself.  She believes the finality of seeing Harry’s grave-- if there even is one-- will grant her the strength to push forward.  To know in her heart that what she had with him is long gone.  Otherwise, she fears she’ll never be able to shake the feeling that there is lingering unfinished business between them, and it will continue to haunt her until she knows for certain.

Even if Oliver insists Mr. Styles never existed.  She has to try.

So Roni sighs, reaching for a bouquet of white lilies that seem to be the least wilted out of all of their counterparts, before making her way to the checkout line.

———————-

The cemetery is somber, but it brings a peaceful sense of calm over Roni as she steps through the gates.  It’s colder and cloudier than it was this morning, and Roni finds herself wishing she’d brought a jacket.  She takes a deep breath, feeling overwhelmed as she scans the many headstones before her.  Finding Mr. Styles’ grave is going to be far more difficult than she’d anticipated.

She takes a step forward along the gravel road that winds through the expansive cemetery.  She hadn’t realized it was going to be such a large place, with headstones covering the hills everywhere she turns.  It’s only the slightest bit disheartening, but Roni is no quitter.  If she can’t find his headstone today, she’ll return tomorrow; and if necessary, every day after that until she finds it.

Oliver’s words echo in Roni’s mind as she walks, scanning each headstone for the name she wants so desperately to see.  Why didn’t he remember Harry?  Surely she hadn’t dreamt that entire day in which she met the elderly gentleman; she has vivid memories of Oliver calling her cousin’s house where she was staying the day of the funeral and telling her how upset he was. That was real.  The books on his nightstand were real.

Harry was real.

In the distance, someone sits on the balcony of their apartment and plays guitar.  It’s a melancholy song, and although Roni knows they’re just practicing and this has nothing to do with her, it feels strangely fitting.  Roni smiles to herself, enjoying the music, as she continues her way down the path.

It feels silly in a way, to be here without any knowledge of the location of Harry’s gravesite or if it’s even in this cemetery at all.  In hindsight, she feels, she could have done just a bit more research.  She could have called around, done some inquiring about Harry.  To be fair, though, she had called his old retirement home only to find that it was no longer a retirement home, but a preschool; a fact that she found quite odd.  The circle of life, so to speak.

As she scans the headstones, she reads each name quietly to herself. She figures it may be best to take the cemetery in sections; a section or two today, another tomorrow. It makes the task feel far less daunting and besides, she could use some more peaceful walks like this in her daily life.

She runs her fingertips along the rough top of a headstone, soberly realizing that there are caskets beneath her very feet at this exact moment.  Realizing that everyone ends up here in their lives, and that one day she too will end up here.  The thought of Harry being somewhere beneath this grass, however, makes her stomach churn.  She hates that she’s here, and she knows it’s too late, but she’s hoping it will give her some type of the closure that she’s aching for.

Roni sighs, muttering a gentle “where are you?” under her breath as she scans the headstones.

She continues along the dirt path, shyly chuckling to herself at some of the names (and immediately feeling guilty for it).  She switches the bouquet of flowers from her right hand to her left and wipes her sweaty palm along the thigh of her jeans.

As Roni continues her walk, she grows a bit colder than before. She wraps her free hand around her stomach, as if it’s going to help, and sniffles when the wind tickles her hair across her nose.  Today had started out so misleading with such beautiful weather, and now she’s shivering against the chilly wind.

It’s about thirty minutes later when Roni happens upon a headstone bearing a name that draws her attention.  The name isn’t exactly the one she’s been searching so desperately for, but it does interest her.  She goes to it. turning off the gravel path and walking along the moist grass.  As she approaches, she reads aloud from it.

“Mrs. Mildred Brown. Beloved wife and mother. Born October 12th, 1899.  Died June 6th, 1990.”  Roni sighs as she continues, reading the passage from the Bible written in script along the bottom.  “‘Well done thou good and faithful servant.’  Matthew 25:21.”  

She shakes her head.  “I don’t understand,” she mumbles, squatting down beside the headstone to get a better look.

It all checks out, as far as Oliver’s story goes.  She regrets not asking him for more information while she had the chance, however.  How did Mrs. Brown die?  What was it like the day Roni supposedly met her?  Had Mrs. Brown been interested in time travel?  Why is none of this making sense in Roni’s brain?

As Roni processes all of this, she suddenly gets the unmistakable feeling that she’s being watched.  It isn’t a threatening feeling by any means, but she can practically feel a pair of eyes on her out of nowhere, and it is somewhat unsettling.

Of course, her logical brain thinks, she is at a cemetery. There are other people here, no doubt, visiting loved ones.  She tries to brush off the feeling, running her thumb over the carved indentations spelling out  Mrs. Brown’s name.

Roni notices a rock atop the headstone, indicating that someone has been here to visit Mrs Brown’s grave recently. She feels it would be disrespectful to touch the stone, so she refrains.  Instead, she just looks at it, wondering who could’ve left it-- someone in Mrs. Brown’s family?-- and why she can’t, for the life of her, remember this woman.

She can’t shake the feeling that she’s being watched, however, and she glances over her shoulder subtly to see if she can see anyone.  She waits a moment, and just as she turns back to observe the headstone once more, she swears she hears her own name.

“Roni.”

The voice is feminine and foreign yet so familiar all at once, and Roni isn’t even sure she’s

actually heard it when she stands up.  She turns to her right slowly on her heel, expecting to see someone and feeling slightly disturbed when she doesn’t.  She licks her lips, feeling her heart rate increase.

“Who--”

She hears it again, closer now and coming from the other direction, and she turns to her left.  Instantly, she is relieved when she realizes who the voice belongs to.

There, standing against a tree with that beautiful, all-knowing smile, stands Violet.  Dressed as if she’s just walked straight out of the 1920s.  

Perhaps she has.

A million thoughts run through Roni’s head; how did Violet get here?  How did Violet know she’d be here?  Violet nods, as if reading Roni’s mind.  

“Hello, dear.”

Realizing she hasn’t said a word, Roni laughs lightly.  “Violet!”  She walks over to the mysterious girl, smiling wide.  “God, it’s so good to see you.”

As she approaches, she wonders if it would be polite to give Violet a hug. Are they at that level of friendship? Do they know each other that well? Is it weird?

Violet doesn’t allow any more time for Roni to overthink, instead taking charge and pulling her into her arms for a warm embrace.

It’s so ridiculously comforting,  and Roni hadn’t even realized just how badly she needed this.  When Violet pulls away, she continues to hold Roni at arm’s length, scanning her face.  “How have you been?”

“Well…”  Roni trails off, then shrugs.  “I mean.  Not great.”  She laughs.  “And you?”

“I’ve been well,” Violet replies, voice calming and warm.  “My, but it’s good to see you.”

“It’s so good to see you too, Violet.  What are you doing here?”

Violet smiles, something subconsciously shifting in her tone, though not in a bad way.  “I had a feeling I would find you here,” she explains.

“But how?”  Roni asks.  “Why today?  Why right now?”  She leans in.  “Why me?”

Violet doesn’t directly answer Roni’s question.  “I’ve come to bring you something,” she says, reaching into a satchel that rests on her hip.   “Something that might be of great value to you.”

Roni doesn’t want to get her hopes up that this gift has anything to do with Harry, but it’s too late.  “Something of great value?”

“Sentimental, if anything.”

Roni can’t help but to deflate.  “Oh.”

Violet finds whatever it is that she was looking for and retrieves it from the satchel.  It seems to be a folded piece of paper, and she holds it out for Roni to take. Roni hesitates, eyeing the paper cautiously, before taking it from Violet’s hands.

“Read it,” Violet prompts.  “It might make you smile.”

Slowly, carefully, Roni unfolds the paper.  Her heart starts pounding as her mind runs through all the possibilities of what this could be.  Before the note is even fully opened, she stops when she recognizes her own handwriting.

“I know what this is,” she says, looking up at Violet slowly.

“You do,” Violet says, nodding. “Read it.”

Roni swallows down the lump in her throat, casting her eyes back to the paper and reading silently to herself.

Harry-

If you’re reading this, it means that I left.  I am safely back where I came from, proving you wrong-- just like I knew I would.  However, it seemed rude to leave without a proper goodbye.  So here it is.  I know I only stayed one night with you, but you’ve been really great. I hope your new year is “swell” or whatever it is you’d say, and that all your hopes and dreams come true. Thanks for letting me stay with you. Sorry about the black eye. Take care.

-Roni

Roni looks back up at Violet, swallowing down the lump in her throat.  “I wrote this the day after I got there,” she says, as if Violet didn’t know.

Violet nods again.  “You did.”

Roni shakes her head, feeling tears prickle at her eyes.  “I don’t understand,” she admits, shrugging in submission, as if Violet is about to play some trick on her.

“Harry’s kept it,” Violet explains, and the way she speaks of Harry in the present tense makes Roni’s heart pound.

“He’s…?”

“Kept it,” Violet repeats.  “Yes.  He found it under his bed a few days after you left.”

“Is he…” Roni doesn’t want to get her hopes up, so she hesitates to ask. “I mean, are you... have you—“

“I have seen him since you left,” Violet answers, smiling knowingly. “Yes.”

Roni swallows the lump rising her throat as the wind whips her hair lightly against her cheeks. “Is he alright?” The question comes out in a whisper.

“He is alright.” Violet nods. “He misses you.”

For some reason, Violet’s words completely overwhelm Roni. She can’t stop her eyes from welling over with tears immediately , and she lets out a little choking laugh. “God,” she says, reaching up to wipe at her eyes. “Does he?”

“Yes, darling.”

“I miss him so much,” Roni says, only half-heartedly attempting to stop her crying. “Can you tell him that?”

“I can.”

Roni laughs again through her tears and steps closer to Violet. “God, I’m sorry. I probably look like a mess. I just can’t believe you’re here, and I…” She trails off, looking down at the paper in her trembling hands. “It’s real,” she says, almost as if reassuring herself. “He was real. This is real.”

“It is real,” Violet says. “You didn’t imagine him.”

“I’ve felt so…”  Roni gestures vaguely as she searches for her words.  “So stupid, I guess.  I don’t know.  I haven’t been able to tell anyone the truth.  I’ve started doubting myself. I-- I mean it all just seems so crazy, doesn’t it?”

“It doesn’t.”  Violet shakes her head.  “Not to me.  Though I can understand the hesitation to share your experience with others.”

“And I broke up with Oliver, you know,” Roni continues.  “Oliver, my boyfriend. We were together for so long and I… I didn’t love him.  I mean I did, but not the way I love Harry. Or… loved Harry.  I guess. But I--” she laughs.  “God, I’ve never felt more alone in my life than I have in the past like, four months, and I-- I can’t even begin to tell you how good it is to see you.  To see… this.”  She gestures at the letter, then speaks again; quieter this time, as if to herself.  “Fuck, I miss him.”  

“Your feelings are completely understandable, Veronica.  And justified.  You have been through so much.  It’s only natural to feel confused.  And the connection you have with Harry transcends time itself.  But these are odd circumstances, and certainly not a situation that anyone should be expected to know how to navigate.  You are not stupid for feeling this way.”  

“No,” Roni laughs, almost bitterly.  “No, I am.  I know I am.  It’s just… god, you’re helping me so much just by being here but I--” she sniffs, wiping her nose on the sleeve of her shirt, “I don’t know.  I know I need to move on.  I know I can’t go back to him but I want to.  More than anything else in the world.”

“What would you tell him if you could?”  Violet asks, cocking her head to the side.  

“Oh god,” Roni says, dabbing at her teary eyes.  “I would say…” she trails off, really considering  what it is exactly that she would say to Harry if given the chance.  She sighs shakily.  “I would tell him he’s the love of my life.  I would tell him he is the greatest thing that has ever and will ever happen to me in this lifetime.  In any lifetime. That I regret leaving him more than anything I’ve ever done. That I miss him.  That I love him.”

Roni doesn’t notice the way Violet’s eyes flicker behind her, because she’s still going.  “And it’s silly,” she continues, “but I have never stopped hoping he’ll come.  I cant…” she sniffs again,  “Can’t bring myself to stop. Even though I know he isn’t coming, I’ve never stopped looking for him.  I don’t know if I ever will, you know?”  

Violet smiles like she knows something that Roni doesn’t, but before Roni can even question it, a voice comes from behind her.

“Well,” it says, slow and deep. “The funny thing about that is, he’s never stopped looking for you either.”

It takes Roni a full ten seconds to even process what she’s hearing, and Violet’s all knowing smile only deepens.  Roni whirls around on her heels slowly, her feet still feel frozen into the muddy, damp ground.

And there’s Harry, as young and as handsome as ever, if not a little bit older than the last time she’s seen him.

He smiles, tears welling in his own eyes as he takes a step towards her. “In every timeline,” he says, and takes another step, “in every lifetime. He’s never stopped looking.”  He stands only a few mere feet away now, and Roni notes the single tear rolling down his cheek, contrasting his unwavering smile.

“I’ve kept my promise, bunny.”

In a whirlwind, Roni is rushing to him. She trips and stumbles a bit on the mud, falling directly into his arms. She doesn’t even bother standing upright, melting instead into his embrace and wrapping her own arms around him. He does his best to straighten her on her own feet, his arms wrapping tightly around her back, but he loses his own footing and falls ungracefully onto his back.

Neither seem to care about their tumble, and Roni crawls up his body— kissing every possible inch of visible skin she can get her lips onto.  Her tears blend into Harry’s own, and he laughs joyfully against her lips as he wraps a supportive arm around her back.

“My god,” Roni sobs into his neck. “My god, my god, what are you doing here?”

“I told you,” Harry says, not even worried about the way his voice cracks. “I never stopped looking. And I found you.”

Roni giggles a wet, teary giggle, squishing his face in her hands and fastening their lips together in a clumsy kiss. He willingly kisses her back, stabilizing her with his hands and squeezing her as if he can’t hold her tight enough.

“Harry,” she sobs, “I missed you so much.”

“Me too, sweetheart.” He kisses her teary cheek. “So fucking much.”

Roni presses a few more haphazard kisses to his lips, as if terrified that she’ll lose him the second she stops. She pulls away after a moment, scanning his face through her own blurry eyes.

“I don’t understand,” she says, “how did you get here?”

Harry beams. “Some people have the gift. Some do not.”

“And you have it?!” Roni asks. “You had it this whole time?!”

Harry laughs at the urgency in Roni’s voice, reaching up to wipe the tears out of his eyes. “I don’t know. I guess so. Violet helped me.”

“Violet!” Roni says, suddenly remembering the witchy girl’s presence. She turns to where Violet had just been standing minutes before, and is surprised to see that she is no longer there.  Harry and Roni both scan the graveyard, but Violet is in fact nowhere to be found.  Roni furrows her brows. “Where did she go?”

Harry doesn’t reply, instead he tilts Roni’s face towards him for another smiley kiss. Roni needs absolutely no persuasion, melting right into him and sighing contentedly.

“I’m so happy,” she cries against his mouth. “So fucking happy.”

“Yeah?” Harry pulls away, tears still streaming freely down his smiling cheeks. “Me too.”

“This feels like a dream,” Roni giggles. “Genuinely. And if it is, I hope I never wake up.”

Harry giggles. “It’s not a dream, sweet girl. I’m here. And I’m staying.”

Roni scans his face for any sign of sarcasm, taken aback by his words. “You’re… staying?” She asks. She doesn’t want to get her hopes up, but God the thought of Harry being hers forever makes her heart pound in her own ears. “Are you serious?”

Harry beams brilliantly at her, letting go of her back to shrug. “Better be prepared to teach me a thing or two about the future, angel. I’m not letting you out of my sight ever again.”

“Oh my god.”  Roni slams her lips into Harry’s, so much so that their teeth clank together, and he chuckles lightly into her mouth.

“I love you,” he says, lips hardly moving from hers.  “I love you so fucking much.”

“I don’t understand,” Roni says, pulling back but still holding Harry in her arms.  “How did you figure it out?  I mean like, the fact that you can time travel.  How did you--”

“Trial and error,” Harry explains.  “Violet wanted me to wait a while.  She said that it would be difficult to learn if I tried right after you left.  The broken heart would make it more devastating if we failed.”  Harry smiles.  “Smart girl, Violet is.  But I couldn’t wait very long.  About a week later, we started working together to get this all sorted out.  We worked on exercises.  We worked on visualization.  We did everything.”

“And then?”

“It took some time.  Obviously.  Went to a few different places.”  He grins. “The 18th century was a lot of fun.”’

“You went that far back?”

“Sure did. Almost didn’t want to leave.”  A playful twinkle glistens in Harry’s eye. “Some old Victorian broad showed me her ankle and I was ready to propose marriage.”

Roni slaps his arm lightly.  “Shut up.”

Harry laughs, finding himself so hilarious. “M’joking,” he says.  “Of course that didn’t happen.”

“Where else did you go?” Roni asks, then softens.  “What took you so long to find me?”

“Wanted to make sure I had the technique perfected,” Harry explains.  “Wanted to be sure I knew how to control where I was going.  The first time I traveled was only to 1899, and it was quite unintentional.  The second time, I was experimenting a bit.  That’s how I ended up in 1778.  But there was a catch.”

“Which was?”

“It was a different 1778.  Not one that you’ve heard of.”

Roni looks confused.  “But… how--”

Harry grins like he knows something Roni doesn’t.  “Ever heard of parallel universes?”

Roni can’t help the laugh that escapes her lips. “Well holy shit.”

“I take it you’re familiar with the concept?”

“I am,” Roni says. “You were the one who told me about it.”

Harry raises his eyebrows, then immediately furrows them in confusion. “I did? I don’t remember—“

“As an old man,” Roni explains. “I met you when you were like… 90 something.”

“Oh.” Harry’s confusion softens. “No kidding. That’s neat.”

“No but… that would mean...” Roni trails off, confusion etched into her features, as she processes everything that’s going on.  “I saw you… you were old…. you died. And Oliver said you… you always talked about this girl from your past... That would have been me, wouldn’t it?”

“I tapped into something even you couldn’t tap into.”  Harry seems proud of himself, and he flashes Roni that smug grin she’s missed so much.  

“What do you mean?”

“Alternate realities,” Harry explains.  “Shifting into another dimension.”

“But how does that--”

“In another universe, yes. Somewhere in time, your memories are true.  I was old.  I was unsuccessful in finding you. In that universe--” he gestures vaguely around the graveyard, “--I’m six feet under somewhere around here.”

Even he seems to be hit with the somberness of his words.  He takes a moment to let that sink in, and then he’s right back to his normal, cheery self.  “But!” he says.  “I shifted.  Into this reality.  With the help of Violet, I created a separate timeline.”

“At the cost of--?”

Harry sighs.  “I mean.  At the cost of some of the people I loved most back home.”  He shrugs.  “But that’s what alternate universes are for, I suppose.”

“Why couldn’t I have just… created my own alternate universe then?  In which I could have kept my mom alive AND stayed with you?  Why didn’t Violet give me that option?”

“You could have,” Harry explains.  “But there wasn’t a guarantee you could have both.  Plus, once you leave one, it is extremely difficult, if not entirely impossible, to get back. You weren’t willing or ready to make that sacrifice.  I was.”

“So we’re in a parallel universe?”

“I am.  You’re not.  You’re in your regular timeline.”

“And you--”

“Shifted into it.  Changed the fate’s design, so to speak. It did shift your timeline a bit, as far as my own existence goes. You remember me being old.  You remember Oliver attending my funeral.  But Oliver doesn’t.  No one has any memory of me, in fact.”

“So who are you to everyone then?”

“That’s the beauty of it.”  Harry grins.  “I’m whoever I want to be.  For all they know, I’m a famous singer from the UK who moved here for work.”

“Oh my god,” Roni giggles, leaning in to kiss all over his sweet, teary face once again.  

Harry smiles that dimpled smile, obviously over the moon and basking in the way she’s loving on him.

“My sweet boy,” Roni says, lips smushed just below his ear.  “My sweet, sweet boy.”

“Missed you,” Harry says quietly. “Couldn’t go on in a world without you.”

Roni bumps her nose tenderly along Harry’s. “I missed you so much.”

Harry laughs quietly to himself.  “Can’t even begin to tell you how excited I was when I ended up here.  Cried with happiness.”

“How long have you been here?”

Harry’s eyes dart up to the sky as he thinks, doing a bit of mental math in his head.  “Two days.  Give or take.”

Roni feigns offense. “And you didn’t come find me right away?!”

“Tried.  Couldn’t.  Didn’t know where you’d be.”

“But how did Violet know?”

Harry smirks.  “I don’t know.  I don’t know how she knows anything. But it seems she knows everything.”

Roni chuckles.  “Apparently so.  God.”

Harry hums, brushing Roni’s hair behind her ear and leaning in to kiss her nose.  “God, I love you,” he says.  

“I love you, too, Harry.  Thank you for finding me.”

“Promised you I would,” he says, punctuating his sentence with a kiss to the corner of her mouth.  “Was so hoping more than anything that you’d be waiting for me.”

Now Roni frowns.  “You had doubts?”

Harry shrugs.  “No.  I mean…” he trails off, eyes scanning the sweeping hills of the cemetery as he considers his words. “No.  I don’t know.  I was hopeful.”

“But…?” Roni presses, leaning into him.

“But you lived in the future.  You had--” he trails off, eyeing Roni carefully.  “--have…. A boyfriend?”  His statement turns into a question, and the look on his face makes Roni giggle.

“Had,” she answers.  “We broke up.  Very shortly after I came back.”

Harry frowns.  “M’sorry to hear that.  Was it… you know...?”

Roni shrugs.  “I was hopeful, too,” is the only answer she offers him.

“Hopeful for me?”

“Yeah.”

“You knew I’d find you.”

Roni kisses Harry’s cheek. “I hoped you would.”

“Poor bloke though. I know how hard it is to live in a world without you.”

“Somehow I think he’ll manage.” Roni giggles. “No, actually, I saw him this morning. When I was—“ She trails off, suddenly remembering the bouquet of flowers she’d bought that now lays forgotten a few feet away. Harry seems to notice them at the same time she does, and he turns back to her. He doesn’t push for her to finish her thought, he instead strokes her hair and admires the way it looks in the wind.

“I was going to put flowers on your grave,” Roni explains, sheepishly.  “I don’t know what I was thinking was going to happen.  Maybe… like, closure or something.  I don’t know.”

“Closure,” Harry repeats, smiling. “Wanted rid of the haunting memories of me then?”

Roni rolls her eyes but she giggles that giggle that Harry has dreamt about every night since she’d left.  “No, god, of course not,” she laughs.  “It’s just that living with the weight of how much I missed you…”  She trails off again, and Harry can see the gears turning in her head as she immediately processes another thought.  “I still don’t understand,” she says.  “I never believed you when you told me.  You as an old man, I mean.  I’d brushed it off.  I hadn’t thought it was realistic.”

Now it’s Harry’s turn to feign offense.  “As realistic as time travel.”

“I know,” Roni giggles again.  “It’s just that you were old when you told me.  I didn’t know you.”

Harry grins now.  “Was I a handsome old bastard?”

Roni’s giggles turn into full belly laughs.  “I mean, I was like, sixteen.  So I didn’t think so, no.”

“Bollocks,” Harry curses, and Roni snorts.

“This is insane,” she says, shaking her head.  “I’m talking to you about… well, you… but as an old man. Memories I have of you, that you didn’t even exist for.  But you did.  I don’t know.”

Harry nods.  “It’s an odd thing,” he agrees.  “An odd situation we find ourselves in for sure.”

Roni hums in agreement, and a moment of comfortable silence falls between the two. She giggles after a moment, squishing Harry’s cheeks between her fingers and kissing his lips again, slow and smiley.

“God,” she says, when she finally pulls away. “I still feel like I’m dreaming.”

Harry pulls that cheeky look of his that Roni’s missed so much, wiggling his eyebrows.  “You want me to pinch you, honey?”  He squeezes lightly at her sides and she squeals, wiggling out of his grasp.  He beams at the sound, wrapping an arm around her quickly and pulling her right back into him before smooching all over her cheeks and her nose.  “C’mere,” he growls playfully.  “Not getting away from me that easily.  Never again.”

She continues to giggle, submitting completely  to him as he tilts her head and kisses her.  They laugh into one another’s mouths, their giggles dying down as their kisses increase in intensity.   His tongue trails along her bottom lip, and it’s almost embarrassing how quickly Roni grants him access to her own tongue.  She’s missed his taste more than she’d ever thought it possible, and she can’t help but to moan when her tongue slides along his.

“Fuck,” she whispers, completely unaware of the fact that she’s crying again.

“Hey,” Harry coos, pulling away and cupping her face with his hands.  “Stop that.  No more of that.  No more crying.”  He swipes at the tears under her eyes, stroking her cheek bones as lovingly as he can. There is no way to convey exactly how he’s feeling right now; he’s just so in love with her and so relieved to be holding her again. Seeing her cry, indicative that she feels the exact same way, makes his heart both sink and soar, and his eyes well up with tears all over again.

They both realize he’s crying too at the exact same time, and they laugh at how silly they’re both being. Harry, still holding Roni’s face in his hands, continues to wipe at her tears while she reaches up to wipe at his.  They continue to laugh and cry and kiss, holding one another as close as they possibly can and forgetting about the entire world around them.

After a little while, Harry pushes himself to his feet with a little grunt. Roni immediately misses his warmth, which is pathetic, she knows.  She can’t help the little whine that escapes past her lips as she reaches for him, and he chuckles as he takes her hand in his. “I’ll be right back, honey, I promise.”  He gives her hand a quick squeeze before turning on his heel to go retrieve her discarded bouquet of flowers.

Roni watches him, so completely enamored and in love with him as he walks.  He’s dressed sort of funky, not quite in his 1920s style but definitely outdated by today’s standards.  He isn’t wearing his cap that she’s missed so much, but his curls are styled messily-- which isn’t helped at all by the wind.  He looks so handsome. So soft.  So him.

Her Harry.

She still feels like she’s dreaming in all honesty, and as she keeps her eyes glued to him she revels in the fact that he’s here. This person that she’s quite literally ached for for months now, the person she didn’t think she could possibly live without, the person she never thought she’d see again— he’s here. He found his way back to her because he loves her. It simply doesn’t feel real.

Harry picks up the bouquet and buries his nose in them, taking a big inhale and smiling to himself with the cutest dimpled smile.  He looks back to see Roni— his sweet Veronica sitting there on the grass, wind whipping her hair and a silly, sweet smile on her face.  He’s overwhelmed, really, and he walks quickly to close the space between him and his girl.  

When Harry arrives by Roni’s side he plops right back down beside her, kissing both cheeks and the tip of her nose. When he pulls away, he’s smiling softly, and he nods down to the bouquet in his hands. “These were for me?”

“Yeah,” Roni says, somewhat bashfully. “I mean… for your grave. So. Yeah, for you but like… not? I don’t know.”

Harry chuckles, humming as he nods. “Mm.”  He reaches into the cheap paper that holds the bouquet together and fingers lightly at a petal. “These are lilies.”

Roni, impressed by his knowledge of botany, smiles. “They are, yeah! How’d you know?”

Harry laughs. “Wasn’t born yesterday, Veronica, for heaven’s sake,” he teases.  “In fact, I was born….” Harry scrunches his face, doing a bit of mental math in his head. “About a hundred and one years ago I think!”

“Holy shit,” Roni says, doing the math in her own head. “So you’re… old.”

“Technically, I suppose,” Harry chuckles. “But also, not actually.”  He kisses her temple,  then reaches into the paper bouquet.  Roni wonders briefly what he’s doing, until she sees him snap a lily off of its stem.  It looks so delicate between his fingers it makes her shiver, and she hardly has time to register what he’s doing before he’s tucking it gently behind her ear. He moves slowly, his thick fingers brushing lovingly against her skin.  

Harry’s eyes scan her face, and in this moment Roni has never felt more loved. He cups her jaw and runs his thumb along her cheek, his green eyes still wet with tears. He hums, his mouth looking so irresistibly delicious, and Roni holds his eye contact with bated breath, waiting for him to do something.

“You are so beautiful,” he says softly, almost more to himself than to her. “My beautiful girl.”

“Your beautiful girl,” Roni repeats, leaning into his touch. “Thank you for finding me.”

“I’ll always find you, Veronica.”  Harry drops his hand from her jaw and wraps it around her smaller hand that’s placed in her lap. “In every timeline,” he leans in and kisses her forehead, “in every lifetime,” he kisses her nose, “I will find you,” her lips, “and I will love you with everything I have to give until my heart stops beating.”  He kisses her lips again, slower this time, before resting his forehead to hers and allowing his eyes to close.

They sit like this, silently drinking in one another’s presence, and when a tear slips down Roni’s cheek neither of them mention it.  Harry presses velvety kisses to Roni’s lips every few seconds or so, and even he’s crying after a bit.  

No words are spoken, but no words are necessary.  In fact, it doesn’t feel like there would be any words to even begin to describe the happiness in both of their hearts presently. Roni swallows down a lump in her throat and giggles, sniffling a bit.

“God,” she says, “I think I’ve cried more in the past few months than I have in my entire life.”

“Well we’re fixing that,” Harry says, pulling away and wiping at her tears. “Effective immediately. No more tears. From here on out.”

“You promise?”

“Only happy ones. I promise.”

Roni licks her lips, then leans back in to kiss him again. “I like the sound of that.”

They stay like this for a while, disregarding the way it’s getting colder by the minute and the way that the tiny bit of sun that’s peeking through the clouds is beginning to dip behind the treetops. Roni catches him up one everything that’s happened in her life since she’d left him, and Harry tells her all about all the adventures he’s had while trying to find her. They laugh, and they continue to cry on and off (which makes them laugh harder) until Harry finally notices Roni shiver subconsciously at a gust of wind.

“Getting colder,” he observes, then adds “perhaps we should get out of here.”

Roni hums in agreement. “We should.  You’ve got to meet my grandparents.”

Harry’s face changes into somewhat amused confusion. “Already?”

“What?” Roni says, rising to her feet and brushing the dirt off of her jeans. “If you’re going to be staying with us you’re going to have to meet them eventually.”

“Yes, but….” Harry rises to his feet as well. “Don’t you think we ought to do this right? I mean, they don’t know me, you’ve just broken up with your long term boyfriend, they’re going to think I’m a creep.”

Roni giggles. “They won’t. I promise. I’ll say you’re a friend from college who’s recently moved to town. We caught up today and you needed a place to stay for a bit. They won’t care.”

“They won’t think it’s… I don’t know, improper?”

“You’ve never met my grandparents,” Roni says.  “They’re like the chillest people ever.”

When she’s met with only a look of pure confusion on Harry’s face, she laughs again. “You’re in the twenty-first century now, Harry. It’s your turn to adapt.” She lightly pinches his side, causing him to laugh.

“Suppose so,” Harry giggles, taking her hand in his and interlacing their fingers.  “Lots to learn.  I have a feeling you’re an excellent teacher, though.”

Roni smiles, swinging their hands as they fall into step, walking along the gravel road winding through the cemetery.  “Well, I’ll do my best,” she says.  “It’s the least I can do for you after you bent the laws of time itself to come and find me and all that.”

“Exactly,” Harry says, nodding.  “Although I won’t lie to you, Veronica, I’m a bit nervous to get it all sorted out.”

Roni gives Harry’s hand a reassuring squeeze.  “Don’t be,” she replies.  “We don’t have to have it all sorted out. When have we ever had anything sorted out?”  She laughs quietly to herself.  “I’ve come to find that life is much better unplanned.”

“Yeah?”  Harry squints, eyes scanning the vast hills as the wind whips his curls messily.  “Well, I’ve come to find that you’re right about most things.”

The silence that follows is comforting and soft, but both are thinking the exact same thing.  Sure, it is a bit terrifying to start a life together--properly--like this.  Harry is here to stay, and as wonderful and exciting as that is, they both know it’s going to be hard work.  He’s going to have to adapt, and it isn’t going to be easy.  He’s starting from scratch.  No job, no house, nothing.

But he does have his honey by his side.  And somehow that’s enough.

They exit the cemetery, hand in hand, and Harry tries his best not to look so clueless as he observes the world around him.  Roni is patient and gentle with him, answering any questions he has and giggling when he makes jokes.  They’ve fallen into their comfortable swing of things that they’ve both missed so deeply, and Harry reckons that with his Veronica holding his hand, he can conquer anything.

As they approach Roni’s grandparents’ house, however, the butterflies in Harry’s stomach begin to act up.  His hands grow sweaty and he hopes Roni doesn’t notice.  (She does.)  He wipes his free hand on the thigh of his trousers and swallows, slowing the pace of  his walking until he stops altogether.

He looks up at the big house, daunting but quaint and surrounded by a completely innocent looking white picket fence, and he can feel Roni watching him.  She’s nervous, too, he knows it.  She gives his hand a squeeze before letting go, and his hand falls dully to his side.

“You sure you’re ready for this?” Roni asks quietly.  “I mean, are you sure this is what you want?  To be here, in a different time, re-learning the world and the people in it?”

Harry turns to her now.  “Of course this is what I want,” he insists, almost defensively. “I just… it’s a bit more scary close up, isn’t it?”

Roni knows he isn’t talking about the house.

“It is,” she says slowly, after a beat.  “But, if I know anything for sure, it’s that you and I make an excellent team.  Whatever the circumstance, we can navigate it together, even if we haven’t got a clue what the right answer is. Somehow I know we’re always going to figure it out.”  She lowers her voice, stepping in closer to Harry.  “You’re the bravest, most wonderful man I know, Harry.  You’re going to be fine.”

He turns to her, smiling as he swallows down the nauseous feeling in his throat.   She beams.  “You’re going to be just fine,” she repeats.

Harry reaches forward, taking her hand in his and bringing it up to his lips, pressing a tender kiss to each of her knuckles.  “Alright,” he says quietly.  “I’m ready.”

Roni smiles, squeezing his hand again and taking a deep breath in through her nose.  “To our new life,” she says.

“To our future,” Harry adds.  “To… forever.”

Roni nods.  “Forever.  Yeah.”

With deep breaths and trembling fingers, Harry and Roni step though the little gate surrounding the yard of the house and make their way onward.  Into their future.  Into the intimidating uncertainty of navigating a life brought on by such unique and odd circumstances.  Two souls, interwoven and transcending time and space itself for the chance to be together, taking on the new set of challenges that await them because they have each other.

No matter where they end up in any lifetime, together or apart, they will always find one another somewhere in time.

[mymelancholiesblues]

No, Mia isn’t  "low-tier" compared to Ada (morally speaking, or w/e) – a measured answer?/essay

So, a couple of Ada haters tried to put up a false symmetry between both of these characters there on twitter, and it inspired me to put my own thoughts down in a more articulate essay as to why that's (Ada's somehow being morally worse than Mia) not sustained by canon in Resident Evil.

standing there, killing time

can't commit to anything but a crime

all the good girls go to hell

'cause even God herself has enemies

and once the water starts to rise

and heaven's out of sight

she'll want the Devil on her team. ⁕

First things first: let us debunk the false symmetry that they tried to establish between these two characters with extremely distinct archetypes – and worse, the following replies to this false symmetry and its poor arguments trying to validate it, pointing out that, in fact, no, character B (that would be Ada, btw) – which is so evidently and ridiculously different from character A (and that would be Mia) – is, in fact, WAY WORSE than character A, and then proceeding to assert some unsupported propositions about misogyny in Resident Evil (which, tbh, definitely IS a recurring problem in the franchise, but that in this case particularly, little or does not apply AT ALL) and how Ada contributes to "the perpetration of a biological cold war".

Starting with what differentiates Mia from Ada grotesquely: we know NOTHING of Ada's true alliances in RE's world. Mia, however, canonically worked for a group that participated in the importation and exportation as well as the manufacturing, testing and marketing of biological weapons: "The Connections", a CRIMINAL SYNDICATE which, amongst other things, was also involved in money laundering, assassinations as well as weapons and drug trafficking. I don't care at all about Mia, so I don't intend to waste much of my time going on about her role in the plot, but people should've already realized by just that much how infinitely dishonest is to try to put these two characters as "similar" ones, or argue that Ada is somehow worse.

Another detail that shouldn't escape anyone's attention too, are the origins and nationalities of both – and yes, I intend to briefly bring up racism against eastern-Asian looking characters (a silent plague that takes form by each passing day in all fiction fandoms) and anti-China xenophobia, but for now, hold this tea there just before I drop it: Mia is canonically American, and previously a Texas-state resident; meanwhile, we have no confirmation of Ada's nationality except for her pretty evident Chinese ancestry. But, as I said, hold it there for a while.

i) espionage — the job

red so silent

wait a minute

or just a little while.

what are you looking for? ⁕

At all times that Ada's "job" was brought up in this franchise, in ALL of her cameos, she has NEVER been called a mercenary in the original Japanese. She's always referred to as a SPY. Even in RE2R, the most recent title in which she's featured in, the original text of the game makes a point of labelling her as a SPY (and not a mercenary) in the dialogue that transpires between Annette and Leon.

It's the North-American translation and correspondent localization that now and then falls for the equivocal use of this other term. This distinction is important since espionage NECESSARILY implies operating in an organized service for, perhaps a country, or a political cause, or a class/group, or a corporation, or whatever. While a mercenary is someone who's acting per their self financial interests, indiscriminately selling their specialized "labour" and skills to anyone who'll offer more.

Ada's not a mercenary, she's a spy. But Mia, in addition to being hired to a canonically criminal company, was also the handler personally assigned to Eveline. I don't care how exactly Mia got in that predicament but the fact is: Mia was canonically employed by a company that profited over illicit activities and directly watched as a family was destroyed and toyed with by this new killing machine (Eve). Yet, we can't state for sure that we know to whom or to what Ada is truly affiliated with.

ii) sources — check them

who's a heretic now?

am I making sense?

how can you make it stick?

and I'm on a trial

waiting 'til the beat comes out. ⁕

This fandom should put a little more thought into which translation and localization of the game texts, dialogues and files they are using to support their arguments. I know that in some cases the United States people have a bit of an inclination to think of themselves as the owners of the planet and deem English as the only language that matters in this world, but let's not forget that RE is a Japanese franchise (wow, insane, right?!). Therefore, the most valid script, with the greatest amount of details, and highest credibility, is the Japanese original. Throughout these years, there have been several errors in translation and localization of the Japanese original to North-American English. And, believe me, curiously enough, plenty of those concern Ada, since she's often mentioned or referred to in a very vague way – without the use of pronouns or adjectives or adverbs that could help in indicating gender. This ended up causing those details and mentions to her to get overlooked, even though in the Japanese text it was a clear reference to her character (per observation of context).

iii) the good guys — one of

head in the dust

feet in the fire

labour on that midnight wire

listening for that angel choir

you got nowhere to run

careful son, you got dreamers plans

but it gets hard to stand. ⁕

Yes, as much as haters try to minimize it, it is SIGNIFICANT that Ada saved so many important characters and stood for unquestionably heroic actions in so many moments - like stopping everything she was doing so she could help completely random Chinese civilians with the helicopter she managed to pilot in that chaos in China (yeah, I know you haters love to forget about this, but it happened, it's there in canon, and no, it wasn't her direct OR indirect responsibility what was going on in China: REPLAY RE6 and for the love of GOD, never again argue that what she did was somehow "the equivalent of evacuating a city after selling a WMD to destroy that same city". It's a case of pure intellectual dishonesty to say such a thing. It's canon that Carla was the one who caused what happens in China, PLEASE, PLAY RE6).

Furthermore, Ada shows compassion on some occasions even for characters who are directly putting her in harms ways, like Annette (in RE2 OG, right after - in order to defend herself - she slaps Annette leading her to lose balance and collapse over the sewers fences, Ada makes an effort in trying to pull Annette back and prevent her from falling) and Carla.

Replay RE4 and pay attention to it, pay attention to her solo campaign: getting involved with Leon's journey in Spain hasn't brought any real benefit to her mission or herself: Ada deviates from her main path several times due to worrying about him and trying to help him and almost ends up dead in several of these occasions over her insistence in doing so: by saving him from Bitores Mendez, by helping him and Ashley against Sadler, by confronting Krauser and stopping him.

It's so lazy to only read/listen to a file in which she says in English that "Leon might be useful to her plans" (this is way more nuanced in the Japanese original of Ada's Report), and ignore everything that was SHOWN in the game: every effort she made to ensure that Leon could rescue Ashley, remove the parasite from his and her bodies, and escape from that hell-island.

The jet-ski she left for their escape was ALREADY there before she was captured by Sadler (or you think she arranged it while she was caught?). Leon having to intervene and save her from Sadler WASN'T her plan. It WASN'T her plan to take the sample from Leon's hands. She wanted to help him get out of there with Ashley and she guaranteed he could do so, she wanted to get the sample by herself and escape too while sending that hell to kingdom's come. But, because she chose to help Leon rescue Ashley right in front of Sadler, she ends up captured.

On her end, Mia never did anything minimally compared to that, and all of her "selflessness" or self-sacrificing actions involved a much, MUCH smaller scope than Ada's: wanting to help her husband and HERSELF is not at all comparable to saving a few dozens of unknown Chinese civilians. So no, they aren't "cut from the same cloth". They don't come from the same place, nor do they share the same intentions or goals, and their contributions to the RE storyline are quite different.

iv) unknown true purpose (shades of grey)

lining up in the background

waiting for the crowd shot to be seen

in the shadow of the big screen

everybody begs to be redeemed. ⁕

In databooks, Ada is recurrently described as "a Chinese spy with extraordinary physical abilities, vigorous health and composed mind and spirit, capable of coping with grim situations and handling even the most difficult requests without losing composure". If we are paying attention to the storytelling ingame, however, we know that this isn't always the case: Ada did let her mask of unswerving emotional and physical strength fall and showed a very fragile side under strenuous circumstances a couple of times already.

Also, in these databooks, they often point out that "she has her own 'true purpose' and has FREQUENTLY betrayed organizations and clients to achieve it". Huh, we can AGAIN, by this only, see how completely different she's from Mia, who personally watched an entire family being driven to insanity by Eveline's hand.

Furthermore, in these databooks, it's often said that "this true purpose is still obscure and whether she truly cared for anyone or simply used her charms to manipulate people that crossed paths with her isn't ever clear". If people are willing to be open-minded and exercise their text comprehension skills, though, they'll see that in multiple occasions of emotional confrontation it has been established time and time again that yes, Ada DOES care. She wasn't capable of shooting Leon and there has been a couple of other times that failing to choose a cool, sociopathic calculation and pragmatical demeanour over empathy and humanity towards others has put her in harms ways: nonetheless she still chose it.

v) positive impact

I'm gonna break the cycle

I'm gonna shake up the system

I'm gonna destroy my ego. ⁕

To this point, RE's plot systematically leads us to believe that Ada has been covertly acting behind the scenes of multiple biological incidents COLLECTING INFORMATION (the job of a spy, who would've thought! lmao), that is valuable to numerous organizations, companies, groups and different contexts, but at the same time of allegedly offering to handle this knowledge for the right price to the big players involved with bioterrorism and clandestine trading of bioweapons, she's also working to sabotage said players.

This is evident throughout the franchise: she intended to hurt Umbrella's business. She outwitted and deceived Wesker multiple times. She even undermined Simmons, someone who was in a position of power in the US government and actively using that position to lead bioterrorist ventures on the parallel side.

There's no concrete evidence or hint as to what she does with the information she collects, and for all purposes and effects, I can presume that she's gathering this knowledge to assist in the discovery of countermeasures and vaccination studies. I might as well argue that she is a Chinese spy who is working against European and North-American capitalism and the imperialism that creates such monsters like the biochemical and bioweapons industry and that her real objective is to dismantle the market for bioweapons and bioterror supported mainly by the USA (see: Simmons and The Family).

That is, as long as it is unclear what her true purpose is, I have the freedom to surmise whatever the heck I want and that all of what she's been doing was for the sake of the greater "good" - and I'll even have canon moments to support this reasoning as it's clear that she regularly sabotages her customers (customers that are unquestionably established as playing for the "evil" side, with perverse intentions) - throughout the franchise. She did this on RE2, RE4, RE6 and Damnation. It's there, transparent in canon, people just choose to ignore it.

She laughs in the face of whoever she's talking to by the end of Damnation, saying she doesn't intend to deliver the Plaga; she scoffs at Simmons; she betrays Wesker and kills Krauser. She had been sabotaging Wesker for so long, that he sent Krauser to be the main agent in the mission in Spain, and Ada was just a "side effect" that he didn't have in control and had to keep an eye on, so he ordered Krauser to keep tabs on her. It's not a mutually beneficial dynamic. Ada doesn't want Wesker to succeed, she despises him; this is clear in the games in which they interact. There are even files that indicate that she was trying to double-cross and get in the way of his plans for at least 2 years before Spain, and he was constantly catching up with her. See here and here.

On her end, Mia was employed by and consciously working for a criminal syndicate.

vi) a (secretly) helping hand

oh, I'm a master pretender

just felt more alone

the further I'd go

but I'll stick around

I'll be your master defender

yeah, I'll stick around. ⁕

Ada approached characters such as John Clemens and Luis Sera, and both had a canonical intention to, in addition to putting an end to their connections with the criminal companies and organizations they've been working for, also expose and denounce them for their crimes. It's in this context that Ada comes into contact with them. And why is that?

Check John's background: he had made up his mind about disclosing Umbrella's crimes to the public. Check Luis' background: Ada went to Spain to assist in his extradition since he feared for his own life if he resolved to turn his back on the cult of Los Illuminados, and also dreaded the consequences of the liberation of Las Plagas on an international scale.

Keep in mind that Ada handed over to Wesker a USELESS Plaga sample. Wesker only got the sample currently circulating in the underground market because he went after Krauser's body. We don't know what Ada did with the master Plaga sample she obtained. We only know from Ada's Report and the Plaga Recovery file that she didn't deliver it to Wesker, and he needed to go out for a plan B to get it.

Even the G-Virus sample that fell into the hands of the clandestine business, it's possible to argue that Ada's involvement in it was flimsy, since Simmons CANONICALLY made over a thousand laboratory tests in Sherry, and, as we know, he was a leading figure in bioterrorism and bioweapons trading with the aid of his position in the US government.

But, guess what, Ada clearly is a non-white character with obvious Chinese heritage and Mia is white, so of course, OF COURSE, someone can so nonchalantly affirm that Ada, this "vile bitch", is somehow WORSE than Mia. The same Mia who watched the Bakers being destroyed. Right.

Also: trying to validate one's point by claiming anything related to the misogyny present in RE franchise, while IN THE SAME BREATH AND TWEET reducing Ada's entire character arc to that of "a sociopathic bitch cured by the magic dick of her love interest" is supposed to be a joke, right? No, really. Joke.

conclusion and a word against misogyny

we are waiting on a telegram to

give us news of the fall

I am sorry to report

dear Paris is burning after all

we have taken to the streets

in open rejoice, revolting

we are dancing a black waltz

fair Paris is burning after all. ⁕

To any Ada fan that has been reading this so far: PLEASE, I ask to consider refraining to use the "oh yes, Ada did some bad shit, bUT" take to defend the character because that isn't sustained by canon in RE, lmao. She didn't do anything evil that had an indisputable bad impact on the plot and other characters arcs. For one, I myself do love some villains, but that isn't the case with Ada.

She did do some unconventional shit yes, since she's a morally GRAY character and an anti-heroine, but by the end of the day, each and every action of hers had a positive impact on the journey of other characters and main plot. Just pay attention to it.

Like idk man, Black Widow, Elektra Natchios, Scarlet Witch and Black Cat from Marvel, Catwoman from DC, Yennefer from The Witcher (some pop culture examples that come to mind).

Saying that this is an "extremely selfish prototypal bad bitch except when it comes to the magical redeeming dick of her love interest" it's a grotesque reduction of a complex female character, and, in its attempt to critique the misogyny present in RE's franchise an expression of misogyny in itself.

Remember: Ada has actions and impact on the franchise ASIDE and IN ADDITION to her romantic involvement with Leon.

[join-the-joywrite]

So before I say goodbye, would you do one last thing for me?

And take, take her to the moon for me

Reggie thinks about crossing over . . . and then he does

read on ao3 here

you can all thank @thedeathdeelers for it because of this post. and also you should all go listen to the song based off bing bong's take her to the moon line

They were going to cross over. Soon. It wasn't going to be some great big show of sparks or jolts of pain. Reggie could tell it was going to be a quiet affair that took them away unexpectedly.

Reggie sat alone most nights, wondering what his unfinished business had been. The Orpheum, though only half a year ago, felt like several years. Stealing Willie's soul back from right under Caleb's nose was just a few weeks ago but it felt like months. On these lonely nights, Reggie mentally relived his afterlife, trying to pinpoint some milestone moment that could've been it. Other nights, he distracted himself playing softly with Alex and Luke, or tweaking songs with Luke, or pathetically failing to learn skating with Willie. Or sometimes he would wander around the house and just do small things here and there.

Once, he did Carlos' forgotten math homework for him. Julie had scolded him about cheating with Carlos, but that had only been for a second before she relayed how grateful Carlos was and how much he wished he could see Reggie and say it himself.

Part of Reggie wanted to voice his thoughts about crossing over. Another part of him hoped that if he didn't talk about it, it wouldn't be real.

And then, one day, Willie vanished. As expected and understandably so, Alex was inconsolable. Reggie made the mistake of offhandedly commenting that it wasn't so bad. Maybe they'd meet up again after they crossed over. It wasn't much longer, now.

Alex was furious first. How could Reggie say that it wasn't so bad? Alex was confused after that. What did Reggie mean with all that? Alex was concerned in the end. Did Reggie really think they were going to cross over?

It was a nice thought, Alex would later tell Reggie. That they could be together when they crossed over and that he would see Willie again. But that wasn't going to happen for a long time. Luke agreed. They were going to take Julie to stardom before they ever considered leaving.

Reggie thought about Julie almost every minute of the day. He figured they would be okay with whatever happened after they crossed over. What would happen to Julie? Would it take her long to figure out what happened? Would their absence turn her away from music again?

That thought alone had bothered Reggie so much that even Carlos noticed. Things were messy around the house. His computer was open on Spotify and the music was blasting into his headphones. No one was beating his messy room for him anymore. Luke decided to talk to Reggie. It all came out in a rush, how he was so afraid that when they crossed over, it would tear Julie apart. After he'd sat with Reggie and listened to everything bottled up, Luke promised to talk to Julie seriously -- and that serious talk happened to be today.

Reggie, who had been laying on the floor while all these thoughts bounced around in his head, sat up suddenly.

The studio was silent.

"Alex?"

Denial set in very quickly. Not now. He wasn't ready yet. He'd known it was coming for at least one month but he was far from prepared.

Alex had to be around somewhere, right? Reggie suddenly realised he was just hoping for a sign of where Alex was moments before he accidentally stepped onto Alex's drumsticks and landed on his back.

The drumsticks rolled across the floor, coming to a slow stop at the wheel of Willie's skateboard.

Sometimes my mom sends me signs, Julie had said once, and sometimes I don't get it until much later but sometimes it's just so clear what she's trying to tell me.

Reggie stared at the drumsticks and the skateboard. Couldn't get much clearer than that.

Suddenly, Reggie was struck with the horrifying thought that Luke had vanished mid-conversation with Julie.

Not thinking before he leapt, Reggie poofed into Julie's room.

"You're not allowed to do that," Julie said casually. "You know that."

"Sorry. Uh, do you know where Luke is?"

Julie shook her head. "He just left a few minutes ago. Said something about wanting to get some lyrics out of his head. Isn't he in the studio?"

Reggie lied very easily and believably. "Oh, I was just downstairs. I haven't checked the studio yet 'cause I thought I heard you talking to someone up here."

Reggie didn't know why he was lying to Julie. He didn't know what was worse. Telling her the truth or wishing he had later.

"Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," he said with a chipper smile.

"Do you want a hug?"

Okay, so maybe he couldn't always lie well about everything. Reggie's nod was hesitant before it was quick.

Julie hopped off her bed and hung her arms loosely around Reggie. She let out a surprised yelp when Reggie wrapped his arms tightly around Julie.

"Someone's competing with Alex for best hug-giver."

Normally, Reggie would've laughed at that. But Alex was gone. Luke probably was too. Reggie would be gone soon too. He had to leave Julie's room. It would break her if she had to see it happen.

"Thanks, Julie."

Julie smiled brightly when Reggie pulled away. "Anytime. My hugs are free for all."

"You should get some sleep. W-we'll see you in the morning."

Why was he lying to her? He knew he'd be gone before she even fell asleep.

Maybe, if she thought they crossed over in the peace and quiet of the still night, she would feel better. Maybe, if she thought they crossed over while she slept, she would blame them for not waking her, not herself for not noticing.

"Fine. But not because you said to." Julie slid under her duvet and grinned at Reggie. She was mid-yawn before she realised. "I'll see you guys in the morning. Tell Alex and Luke I said good night."

"I will," Reggie said. And if he did happen to meet Alex and Luke, he would without a doubt deliver Julie's message. "I love you. We love you."

"Aww. I love you too, Reg."

Reggie left before he did or said something that would make Julie worry.

He meant to land in the studio. Instead, he found himself in the kitchen, his legs numb and a hollow emptiness in his chest.

"Reggie?"

Reggie looked up to see Carlos, backlit by the open fridge. "You should be in bed."

"You should be invisible."

"Uh . . . that's true."

Carlos kicked the fridge closed as he walked over to Reggie, quietly setting his glass on the island counter. "Are you okay? You look a bit sick. Can ghosts get sick? Is that a thing? Are there ghost doctors? Are they, like, special ghost doctors or just doctors that died?"

"That's too many questions at once, little man."

Carlos frowned. Reggie always answered every single question on the odd occasion that he could see and hear Reggie -- or even if Reggie was just chatting to him with Julie's phone. "Are you okay?" Carlos asked again, this time more serious and somehow even quieter than before.

"I will be." Another lie. He didn't know. But that didn't matter. What mattered was that Julie and Carlos didn't worry.

"What's wrong?"

Reggie wished he could hug Carlos like he had hugged Julie just a few minutes ago. "I, uh . . . I gotta go."

"Oh. Where are you going? You're gonna be back, though, right?"

"I don't know." The first truth Reggie had spoken all night. "But I won't come back."

"Wh-- . . . oh." Carlos glanced down at the floor.

"Hey," Reggie said, crouching down. Carlos was looking down at him now. "You're gonna be okay."

"But what about you? Are you gonna be okay?"

Reggie shrugged. "I hope so. Maybe I'll see you again when you're all old and wrinkly."

"Ha ha." Carlos' tone was sarcastic, but his smile was genuine. His eyes widened and a gasp caught in his throat when Reggie wiped away the tears he didn't even notice. Without stopping to question it, Carlos threw his arms around Reggie's shoulders and held tight. "Do you have to go?"

The fragility of Carlos' croaked question set alight a small but agonizing flame in Reggie's chest. "I have to," he murmured, holding Carlos gently. "Alex and Luke are probably waiting for me."

"I don't want you to go."

"I know."

Reggie's entire body, save for the burning yet soothing sparks in his chest, felt numb. He had to glance over Carlos' shoulder to make sure he still had his arms. He moved to pull back so he could leave -- Carlos didn't have to see whatever crossing over looked like -- but Carlos wouldn't let go.

Reggie figured he would've been able to break out of Carlos' hold on a normal day. But today wasn't normal, was it?

"I have to go," Reggie said.

Carlos pretended he didn't hear it. "You're the best brother in the world."

Finally, Carlos let Reggie move back, but Reggie didn't stand or poof out. Instead, he gave Carlos a smile and wiped Carlos' wet cheeks. "Nah. You are. You're gonna look after Julie for us, aren't you?"

Carlos nodded. He refused to acknowledge the fact that he could see through Reggie. He was just tired and needed to go to bed, right?

"Julie belongs with the stars," Reggie said. "Take her to the moon for me, okay?"

"I'll try," Carlos told the empty kitchen. "I promise."

And then he wrapped his arms around himself and sat down on the floor as his small shoulders shook silently.

[milkacchan]

Request for anon: Omg could you please make a part two of an S/O who's stupid good with kids but with Shinsou, tamaki, deku, and aizawa??

This is a lil long bc it was 4 characters! And I kinda changed Aizawa up a little bit so I hope you still like it.

Deku-

• Shit happens

• Shit happens all the time

• This specific incident involved a quirk manifestation and a child.

• You and two had just been walking

• Just chilling out after a rigorous training day

• Then there was screaming and panicking. Your head snapped in its direction, he hadn't fully processed it before you'd taken off

• Some kids quirk had manifested. It seemed pretty severe.

• It looked like some kind of energy quirk, like a force field or something.

• The kid was scared, she was panicking and thrashing from her place in the air

• He stood behind you, surveying the environment to find a solution

• And he almost missed you jumping in until her heard your voice.

"Okay baby, look at me, just look at me and breathe. You'll be okay, Just breathe."

• You were walking towards her, trying to get her to slow her breaths. The more she panicked the worse it would get.

• He stood where he was, he didn't want to overwhelm her, he decided he'd let you take care of it.

• He watched quietly as you breathed with her, again reassuring that'd she'd be just fine.

• And he watched as the field flickered away and the girl fell. His body lurched foward on instinct and he was beyond relieved when he saw that you had caught her.

• He let out a breath as the girl gripped your shirt and sobbed into your shoulder.

• A hand reached up to hold the back of her head

• "it's okay," you murmured and he smiled

• It seemed to come easy to you, nurturing people. It seemed to come easy calming this girl down.

• He turned his attention to reassuring the bystanders that the two of you were okay and that you'd be taking the girl home. They dispersed slowly after his urging for them to leave.

• You were standing now, the girl still in your arms, holding on for dear life.

• Poor thing was still shaking

• "Look," you hummed. "This is my friend, he's going to walk with us to get you home. That okay?"

• Your hand was rubbing her back now and your cheek was pressed against her temple

• Dekus heart fluttered

• God you were beautiful

• And strong

• And just everything he ever wanted

• The small girl nodded, keeping her face hidden, whispering a soft sorry

• "Don't be sorry princess, you didn't do anything wrong." You pressed a kiss to the top of her head and Deku sees the girls grip tighten.

• He has a hand on your lower back during the walk to the girls house, you'd somehow managed to find where it was even with all the crying the girl did

• He watched as you hand the girl over to her mother who profusely thanks you

• Information is traded as she says she wants to make it up to you even after your assurance that it was no trouble at all

• And he's holding your hand again when the two of you leave, going on and on about how well you did in the situation

• He's so proud

Shinsou:

• He realizes just how good with kids you are when he she's you interact with Eri

• I mean everytime the two of you are together its wholesome

• He takes note when Aizawa tries to apologize for her always being with you and you brush it off

• You enjoyed her company and found no problem in it

• Shinsou tucked that piece away for later

• The girl adored you, genuinely

• And you stopped at nothing to make sure she was okay

• She'd spend a lot of time in the 1-A dorms with you, just as he would.

• If she said she was hungry, you'd be up to make her food in no time

• If she cried, you'd have her on your lap, wiping the tears from her cheeks as you assured her it was okay

• and he'd watch, soft smile gracing his lips

• She'd spent the night with you on more than one occasion

• Nightmares were prominent with Eri

• Staying with you seemed to help that

• He'd sit beside you as you braided her hair

• He'd listen to her ramble to you and he'd watch you nod and hum in response

• He'll lay on one side of you and Eri will lay on the other side, curled into your side as she watches whatever disney movie she picked

• and his heart will swell when the two of you sing along to the songs

• When Eries feeling down, she comes to you for comfort

• You'll tell her how beautiful she is

• He'll watch you hold her to your chest and rub her back

• He watches you play with her hair, kiss her cheeks, telling her how amazing she is

• How you're lucky to have her with you

• He'll watch as she falls asleep in your arms, content

• And it always makes him realizes just how lucky he is to be with you

• How lucky he is to have /you/

• How lucky Eri is to have you

• I mean this man fr fr in love w you

• This one time, you and shinsou had fallen asleep watching a movie, it was about 3am when there was a small knock on the door

• You get up to answer it and Shinsou wakes up to you getting up

• Sure enough its Eri, she's sniffling and holding her stuffed animal

• And immediately your kneeling in front of her wiping her cheeks

• "Baby what's wrong?"

"I had a nightmare...I didn't want to wake mr. Aizawa up. I didn't want to make him mad..."

"Oh honey," you kiss her nose and pick her up, rubbing her back in response to her small whine. "You want some tea? Then you can stay with me for the night? We can tell Mr. Aizawa in the morning, he won't get mad."

She nods, laying her head on your shoulder. "Hi Shinsou," she waves weakly. "I'm sorry for waking you up too."

"Hi Eri," and he gets up too, walking over and running a hand through her hair. "It's okay, you're safe here. We won't let anything happen to you."

She nods again

He follows the two of you down the hallway and to the kitchen

Mina, Kaminari, and Sero are still up on the couch. He snickers as you glare at them.

"You guys should be asleep. Get out."

Mina groans and Sero grins knowingly, pulling the other two out.

• I mean shinous heart is melting rn

• you're like totally momming out

• You've got Eri in one arm, humming by her ear as you turned the stove on to get a kettle boiling

• You're swaying gently, readjusting her so she's in the center of your chest

• you run a hand through her hair and she smiles

• And Shinsou swears he could die right there

• Just looking at you interacting with the kid he considers a little sister is enough to kill him fr fr

• His poor heart can't take much more

• Eri lifts her little hands up to cup your cheeks. "You're not going to leave right?"

"Never ever," you smiled, touching your nose to hers.

Then she looked at Shinsou and this man about passed out. "Never." He puts a hand on her head. "We'll always be here,"

• The tea is made, the three of you drink it at the table, bent on getting Eris mind off her nightmare

• And then you carry her upstairs again and down the hall into your bedroom.

• the three of you settle down and you out on a movie (volume low of course) that she can fall asleep too and it's not long before she's out, pressed into your side.

• Shinsou smiles and kisses your temple. "I love you, you know,"

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

"I love you too. Now stop being a sap, its gross." You stick your tongue out and he let's out a low chuckle.

"You're good with her."

"I want her to be happy," you mumble. "She deserves that at least. And if the world doesnt have anyone else doing it, then I'll do it."

He kisses your temple again. "I know."

• Ever since Eri came to live in the dorms, you've gotten up earlier, mostly to make the girl breakfast

• The whole class realizes it, sometimes they'll try to steal some but you'll obliterate them for trying

• You've always got Eri in some proximity to you when you're cooking. Usually she'll watch

• Shinsou finds himself sneaking into the 1A dorms in the mornings (much to his classes distaste) but how could he not?

Aizawa-

• He realizes that you talk a lot of shit about how much you 'hate kids' but when it comes to them, you're always doing your best to make sure they're comfortable and happy

• Its another pro hero moment

• His class is attacked and you happen to be there and this man watches you go FERAL protecting these fucking teenagers and his heart swells and he'd filled with so much fucking pride

• The dumbass villain who fuckin tried is now on the ground in front of you completely beat to a pulp

• Poor guy had no chance

• As soon as you knew he was out your attention had turned to the kids behind you

• You checked for injuries, concussions, made sure they felt okay

• Mina looks like she's on the verge of tears, deadass hits you with 'can you be my mom?????'

• Kaminari and Sero are nodding in agreement. 'Pls'

• He tried to tease you about it

• "Shouta I'll knock your ass out too, shut your fucking mouth,"

• 'Reluctantly' becomes class mom

• Deadass

• You find yourself bringing snacks or making them something and Shouta brings it in 🤢

• Ur like oh god ew

• 'Shouta take this shit in for ur fuckin kids'

'You mean OUR kids'

• That was instance one

• Happens again but this time in the city during a robbery with smaller kids, much smaller

• And you don't waste a second, you're by their side

• Checking to make sure none if them are physically hurt

• So then you work on calming them down, telling them to breathe and just look at you

• Gently rubbing they're cheeks and keeping them close to you

• Shoutas 🥺

• Midnights 🥺

• Hizashis 🥺

• "M scared-"

"I know baby, but its gonna be okay. We won't let anything happen, okay?"

• And you carry these little fuckers out

• Ones on your back

• You've got one on each hip

• And another sitting on your shoulders

• Aizawa see's right through you

• "So...you say you don't like kids??"

"Hizashi I will LITERALLY hang you by your underwear, get away from me."

• God one time he see's you singing to this kid who's panicking and he deadass thinks he's gonna cry bc you're so precious

• And then Eri comes into the picture and you dont even pretend to hate kids anymore

• This child becomes your daughter

• And he's v happy about it because he wasn't one to really think about having kids

• But he's not gonna let Eri go, she's been through to much

• Not to mention practically adopting shinsou

• He's glad you're doing well with them

• They've seen your soft sides, much to your distaste, but they dont know that

• speaking of shinsou

• You do lowkey mom him

• Not to a super extent

• You're more like the cool aunt w mom tendencies

• But they're both happy to have some consistencies

• Shinsou knows that he's always welcome to come talk to you (and Aizawa but you know sometimes shit pops up that he's not particularly comfy w and you seem to be good at that)

• And he does

• Aizawa has accidently overheard his fair share of conversations between you two

• It always makes him happy that you all connect on that level

• I mean he wouldn't mind having a biological child

• But he's content with the family dynamic they have rn

• as much as you deny it you'd be a great mother

Tamaki:

• Tamaki isn't /bad/ w kids but he's not super great with them either

• Anxiety do be a bitch

• You always seem to ease up around kids

• He likes to watch

• Kids just seem to gravitate towards you, regardless of where you are, genuinely

• At the park? Oh boy he's ready to watch you interact with the kiddos

• Restaurant? Oh yeah, he's ready for some 5 year old to waddle up and talk.

• But in particularly rough situations, he's always super impressed. You seem to do WONDERS to calm kids down.

• The other pro heros could never.

• Endeavor? No.

• All might? Who she?

• No baby, it's all you.

• Anyway, one time, yall were out on a date.

• Y'all were f i s h i n g

• Aka you had been itching to go outside and decide to teach Amijiki to fish and he agreed bc why not

• So there you are, outside in the hot sun, in a crop top and shorts on a dock

• He's about 6 feet away, still talking distance, but far enough so your lines wouldn't get tangled

• He's not having a bad time at all, he's trying to ignore anyone else that might be there

• bc he wants to be w you and is tired of his anxiety getting in the way

• anyway, he almost misses the little girl that walks up.

• He looks over and she looks like she's gonna cry.

• She prolly has anxiety too tbh

• "Um...can-can you help me?"

• you look down and smile, "yes ma'am, what can I do for you?"

She held up her own small rod. "I uh...I lost my hook and I forgot how my dad tied everything on.."

"Want me to show you?"

"Yes please," her gaze flickered down.

"Okay first things first, do you have sun screen and water?"

She shook her head.

• So before you do anything, he watches you spray sunscreen on the little girl and give her a water bottle, which she only takes after you reassure that it's okay for her to have

• Then you call him over

"Amajiki, baby come here so I can show you how to do it too."

And he listens, reeling his line in and sitting next to you

"This is Amajiki, he's my friend okay? I'm teaching him how to fish too."

• The girl seems to relax at that and you get to work

• But he's not paying attention to what you're actually doing

• He's watching you

• You've got a bright smile on, your voice is soft as you show her the steps

• And once you get done tying the swivel on and putting a hook on, you hand her a worm

"Go on, bait it,"

• The girl does so with a small comfortable smile

• His heart melts

• You're just so damn good with them like you're literally a goddess already

• And this just makes it better

• You show her how to cast right and then she's all set

• She ends up sitting with you two for a little over an hour

• Then she waves goodbye and bounds off

• Amajiki kisses your nose gently. "You're so cool, bunny."

"You big sap, she told me you were her favorite hero. Did you zone out or something."

"Yeah," his face flushed. "I did."

[katelyn--renee]

Out of the Fire (Part two)

Title: Out Of The Fire (Part two)

Fandom: Supernatural AU

Main Characters series: Reader, Lieutenant Firefighter!Dean Winchester, Lawyer!Sam Winchester, Jessica Winchester (Moore), Nurse!Lisa Braeden (Formerly Winchester), Ben Braeden-Winchester, Harper Winchester (OFC), Charlie Bradbury, Firefighter!Benny Lafitte, Firefighter!Jo Harvelle, Firefighter!Castiel Novak, Claire Novak, Mechanic!John Winchester, Firefighter Captain!Ellen Harvelle, Mechanic!Bobby Singer, Doctor!Arthur Ketch, Nick Vaught and many more!

Pairings: Dean x Reader (eventual), Dean x Lisa (past), Reader x Nick (past), Lisa x Ketch (current), Sam x Jessica (current)

Word count: ±2200 words

Series summary: A slow burn romance. Reader is trying to get away from her troubled past and start fresh; a new name, new town, new friends, and a new job. A clean slate. After years of planning and saving, she is able to open her own business. With the help of her best friend and business partner, Charlie Bradbury, and her new flirty firefighter friend, she is hopeful, even when disaster strikes and her past threatens to catch up with her years later. 

Part two summary: Flashback to when you first met your green eyed hero and their budding romance. 

Warnings series: NSFW, 18+ only! Fire or mentions of fire, fluff (so much fluff), angst, eventual smut, mutual pining, alcohol abuse, alcohol intoxication, mentions of domestic abuse (physical, verbal), mentions of miscarriage, mentions of adultery/cheating, mentions of death, dangerous or life threatening situations, stress, descriptions of injuries, blood, hospital scenes, character death. 

Author’s note: Here is part two! I hope you enjoy this chapter and all it’s fluffy goodness! :)

A special thank you to @that-one-gay-girl and @deanwanddamons for being the wonderful beta’s that you are! Your feedback is always appreciated! Check out their awesome work and spread some love!

All graphics and dividers done by me! :)​

If you like this story, please don’t hesitate to leave a like, comment and if you’re feeling extra generous, share! Your feedback gives me live and motivation! If you would like to be tagged in the series, please don’t hesitate to ask!

Thank you and let’s enjoy this ride together!

<<-- Read part one, here!

Out of the Fire Masterlist!

Interested in more of my work, check out the link below.

Masterlist

About five weeks ago.

The shop was busier than usual, but being the final days of summer, it was expected. It wasn't anything you or Charlie  couldn't handle, of course, but it sure did make for long days and even longer nights of cleanup. 

"Charlie, table two needs refills, table six never got their vanilla lattes, and table four is ready to pay." You announced as you joined your partner behind the counter with a handful of dirty mugs and plates, having just made one of many rounds through the seating area.

The two of you danced around each other gracefully, moving in harmony as you switched from one task to another. “On it.” She acknowledged, already preparing the missing drinks and throwing in a complimentary pastry for the mistake.

You set the pile of dishes down into the sink before turning to the next customer in line, flashing him a friendly smile. “Yes, hi, how can I help you?” You greeted urgently, looking up to meet a set of stunning green eyes. You faltered slightly, taken by surprise by his strikingly good looks.

He smiled, almost bashfully, as he began to place his order, seeming not to notice your hesitation. “A round of coffees, black, for me and my buddies ,” He motioned toward the booth near the large bay window which was occupied by three other bodies; two men and one woman, all of whom adorned matching uniforms. “Cream and sugar on the side. Oh, uh, larges… or eh, talls?” He added with a sheepish chuckle, clearly unfamiliar with the coffee house lingo.

You couldn’t help but giggle at that, pulling your bottom lip between your teeth to prevent yourself from smiling more and potentially embarrassing him. “Venti.” You corrected him playfully. You saw the confused look on his face, his head cocking like a confused puppy, before adding, “For our ‘large,’” 

You used air quotes to emphasize your point, rolling your eyes at the technical terminology. “It’s venti.” You saw it the moment he understood what you were telling him, and he chuckled again, not missing the way he ducked his head to hide the slight flush to his freckled cheeks.

 “Never too old to learn something new.” He chuckled again and winked at you, the gesture setting butterflies loose inside of your stomach. It was your turn to look away this time, your face hot with a blush. He fished his wallet from his dark blue cargo pants, looking at the assortment of baked goods.

“Throw in a few of those bagels and croissants, too, please.” He added, casting his gaze down at the display case once again. “Oh, and a piece of that cherry pie.” He added almost dreamily, pulling out a couple of twenties. 

Upon further inspection, you took notice of the soot and ash that dirtied his face and darkened his hair in certain places. He had dark circles under his gorgeous eyes, too, clearly exhausted after a long shift. You glanced in the direction of his crew members, finding much of the same. “Long night?” You asked, trying to be friendly as much as you were curious.

“I look that rough, huh?” He teased, a look of mock offense accompanying his handsome features.

 You shook your head, a smile still curving your lips at the corners, “Oh no, I didn’t mean it like that.” You clarified hastily as you calculated his order  into the register, making a point to leave off the coffees; it was the least you could do for him… eh, them, right?  

He winked again and laughed, the sound deep in his chest, assuring you that he was only teasing. “I know you didn’t,” The corner of his mouth turned up into a smile, his tongue darting out to wet his lips, watching your face and the way you tried to suppress your smile. “How much do I owe you, sweetheart?” He asked, glancing down at the display screen. 

The term of endearment made your heart flutter slightly, and you couldn’t keep the smile from creeping onto your face again. You swallowed the feeling down, pressing the enter key before you read aloud his total. 

“That’ll be $19.94, Mr. Firefighter.” He rose a questioning brow at the total, glancing up at the menu prices. “Coffee’s on the house.” You added quickly with a closed-lip smile, your eyes sincere. “It’s the least I can do for your services.” 

Several emotions seemed to make their way across his face, contorting it briefly before settling on gratitude. “Thank you.” He said, his voice genuine. He held out one of the twenty-dollar bills, paying for his order. “That was really kind of you, truly.” He smiled softly, glancing down at the name tag attached to your apron. “(Y/N).”

A smile formed on your lips before you could stop it, and your cheeks flushed at the way he said your name, your eyes finding the name embroidered onto the left side of his dark blue button-up shirt, opposite of a silver badge over his heart. Red patches were on either sleeve, proudly showing off the station they serve. “It’s no trouble, Lieutenant Winchester...” You promised with a sly smile. 

He laughed, appreciating your observation. “Dean.” He insisted as you accepted the bill. Your fingers touched, brushing against each other softly. The touch, however slight, was like an electric shock, igniting every part of your body. 

There was an annoyed grunt behind the firefighter, but the two of you paid little attention to it. You put the money into the till and collected his change, but Dean insisted that he didn’t need it. He walked backwards to his table, his bottom lip drawn up between his teeth. The two of you couldn’t seem to stop watching each other, nor did you want to, silently flirting with your eyes. 

You giggled when he bumped into an unoccupied table, watching as he almost knocked over its contents and awkwardly fumbled with the accompanying chair that nearly fell over. He rubbed the back of his neck and chuckled self-consciously, trying to conceal his embarrassment. He ducked his head when he got back to his table, his friends giving him a hard time. 

He hid his face in his palms as a dark-haired man with scruff and blue eyes clapped a hand against Dean’s shoulder, booming with laughter. “Smooth,” You heard the blonde female tease, snickering at her partner. You watched them as you gathered up their order, blushing when you caught him stealing a few glances your way. When finished, you brought their order out to them personally, earning you another wink from the fireman.

The rest of the shift went by in a blur, unable to get those emerald eyes out of your head. Charlie had seemed to notice your distraction and, in perfect Charlie fashion, commented on it as you were closing up shop. “That fireman sure left his mark on you, huh?” She teased, a knowing smile drawing her lips up. 

You scoffed at her and tried to play it off like you didn’t know what she was talking about… and failing. “W-What? No - No, I - Who? I don’t know what you’re talking about, Charlie.” You muttered, locking the doors and placing the keys into your pocket.

She looked skeptical and cocked her hip, propping a hand there. “Uh-huh, sure.” She stated, waving her hands. “And I’m not the Queen of Mordor.” She said sarcastically, “Oh wait, I am.” She said exaggeratedly with her hands thrown in the air, referencing her extracurricular activity of LARPing. 

You rolled your eyes fondly at your best friend; she’d dragged you along to her LARPing weekends on more than one occasion, and you’d humored her, going along with it because it made Charlie happy. “You can’t fool me, sista, now spill the beans.” She insisted, following behind you with the broom as the pair of you cleaned up.

You sighed, wiping down one of the tables and the chairs that joined it, already knowing that you wouldn't win this battle against the feisty redhead. “I don’t know…” You hesitated, chewing on your bottom lip as you thought about the encounter. “I can't explain it, I don’t know how to explain it… but there was just something about him… y'know?" You recalled, picking up one of the chairs and putting it on the table. "I just… I can’t quite put my finger on it…"

Charlie giggled, "Bet you wish you could." She teased, clearly hinting at more than she said. You gasped and feigned innocence, throwing the towel at her. Charlie laughed more, catching the soiled cleaning cloth before it collided with her face. "Oh, come on (Y/N)! I know that look in a woman's eye. I’ve seen it dozens of times! You want him. Bad!"

She threw the cloth back, and you caught it with ease. "Jeez, you make me sound so desperate." You grumbled, not denying Charlie's observation, despite the dramatics. 

Charlie hadn't missed a beat, and she grinned, a cocky sparkle in her eyes. "So you do like him." She chimed accusingly, clearly happy to be right.

You rolled your eyes again, moving onto the next table as Charlie continued sweeping under the one you'd just cleared. "Okay. Yeah, fine." You admitted, "I thought he was cute and charming and sexy in that uniform," 

Charlie made an ‘I-knew-it’ face, but you continued before she could make a sly remark, "But it doesn't matter. It's not like I'm ever gonna see him again." You stated with a reluctant sigh, spraying down the next table with the cleaning agent, trying to hide the disappointment lingering in your voice. You began to scrub at a stubborn spot on the table, trying to distract yourself.

Charlie frowned sadly, reading into your mood, and leaned the broom down against the table before closing the space between you. "I'm sorry for being pushy. It's just that you work all the time. When was the last time you did anything for yourself?" You were about to answer when she held up a finger, "Other than this café. This doesn't count, this is work." 

She had a point. You couldn't remember the last time you'd done anything that didn't involve this little shop. "Exactly. I just wanna see you have some fun and that," She thumbed over her shoulder toward the door, referring to Dean, "was fun." You chuckled softly, your cheeks getting warm at the thought. 

"You deserve to live a little,” She put her arms on your shoulders and squeezed affectionately, “Especially after what that snake put you through." You frowned at the reminder, dread coiling inside of your stomach and a frown pulled at your lips at the mention of your ex, Nick. 

Like always, Charlie didn’t let you get too lost in your thoughts, "And who knows, maybe he has an equally attractive sister for me." She added with a playful shrug and a giggle, effectively distracting you. "Fate works in mysterious ways, sista; you never know what she might throw your way." She added mysteriously, wiggling her eyebrows for added effect. 

As it turns out, Charlie was right. Fate did work in mysterious ways because, in the weeks that followed, Dean continued to show up, sometimes with his crew, but mostly by himself. The times he showed up varied, depending on his work scheduled, which you soon noticed was quite busy. Regardless of the hour, he always showed. 

It wasn't long before you memorized his order by heart; a venti coffee, black, and a slice of pie; whichever flavor was baked for the day's special. The flavor never seemed to be an issue for the firefighter, but it didn’t take you long to realize that cherry was clearly his favorite, with pecan  a close second. 

The pair of you flirted and subtly got to know each other as time went on, teetering somewhere between acquaintances and friends. He’d flirt. You’d flirt. But it never went any further than that.

Charlie teased you about it the whole time, of course. She wouldn’t be your best friend if she hadn’t. You’d just roll your eyes or shake your head every time she’d urge you to "grow a pair and ask him out already." 

You wanted to. Of course, you wanted to; you’d be an idiot not to want that.

But you didn't, of course, because you were too embarrassed and too afraid to act on your feelings. You'd done that once before already, and you paid one hell of a price for it. Hell, in a way, you still were. Nick left such a nasty scar on your heart; you weren't sure if you could ever love again. You were in a constant state of fear, afraid of being hurt again.

Charlie, being the wonderful best friend that she is, always tried to remind you that love… true love… would never hurt you. That real love was the stuff of magic and fairy tales. That what you had with Nick wasn’t love. It helped, a little, but that fear never truly went away, you just sort of learned to live with it.

Maybe someday you’ll feel differently.

And there you have it. Part two is complete. I hope you enjoyed that chapter as much as I did. Awkward/adorable Dean is one of my favs. Haha. 

As always, thanks for reading! 

Read part three, here! -->>

Taglist!

Supernatural

@akshi8278​

Out of the Fire (series)

@vicmc624 // @anotherspnfanfic // @krazykelly // @compresshischest09 // @thefamilybusiness  

[arhvste]

hc for kenma and fem reader, that’s been friends w hinata since middle school and goes to karasuno, like how would they meet, how would they confess, first date etc. can the reader also be a first year. but doesn’t play volleyball she just watched hinata sorry if that doesn’t make sense

we’re all soft for kenma hours 🙈

also there's a lot to consider and include here so this is going to be a little longer than my usual hcs posts 

-

KENMA WITH A FIRST YEAR S/O HE MEETS THROUGH HINATA

you’ve been friends with hinata since your first day of middle school when you got sat next to the excitable volleyballer 

you both ended up attending karasuno high much to his delight

when he’s not with his volleyball team he’s with you telling you everything about it since you don’t play the sport yourself 

you know all the rules and basics by now by attending enough of his practices and games

so hinata has just come back from the training camp that he attended in tokyo

he is telling you all about the new techniques and he’s worked on and all the new people he’s met

“there was this biiiggg third year! he’s captain of fukurodani and one of the top 4 aces in japan!!”

“uh huh”

“and his friend was captain of the rival team we want to play in nationals, another big third year with weird bed hair!”

“sounds like you met a lot of new friends”

“yup! but one of my new favourite friends is the setter of the team we want to play in nationals, his name is kenma, he’s a second year and he’s super quiet but he’s a real good player!”

hinata shows you a picture he took with this kenma 

there next to one of your closest friends stood a boy with long blonde hair, his dark roots showing but somehow it made his whole look all the more attractive, golden feline eyes and a gentle shy smile as he looked up at the camera.

now, while you’re thinking about how cute kenma is, hinata is actually watching you

you see, unbeknownst to you, the little middle blocker had mentioned you on several occasions to his new friend

something about kenma made hinata think of you while he was in tokyo

so he felt the need to talk all about you to him to which kenma listened to intently 

so there’s a practice match against nekoma coming up

obviously you go because you want to support your friend

you literally forget all about kenma and how he plays for nekoma

honestly hinata tells you all about every single new friend he meets wherever he goes

so it’s hard to keep track of who is who and where everyone comes from

but the picture of kenma comes flashing back when you see him out on the court

hinata wasn’t lying

he was a good player

he seems like he isn’t that into it but you can tell he’s calculating his moves to be precise 

very much a contrasting character compared to the rest of his outgoing team

nekoma end up winning by one set but it’s only a friendly practice match so all is well

you go down to congratulate hinata and the rest of the team

and hinata is there with kenma chatting happily while the shy setter is smiling and nodding slightly 

you make your way over to hinata and he notices you and his smile beams even brighter

“kenma look! this is y/n the friend i told you all about! isn’t she pretty?!”

you’re blushing and so is kenma 

brief introductions are done between the two of you and before you know it hinata is off to go and annoy kageyama 

you’re left there standing with the rivalling team’s setter

at first the atmosphere is awkward but kenma actually speaks up first

“so... you’re friends with shoyo he's told me a lot about you”

“all good things i hope”

kenma lets out a small smile and your heart flutters slightly

“all good things”

you and kenma actually have a pretty good conversation from there and end up exchanging social handles

from there your friendship begins properly 

tagging each other in memes

late night texting 

kenma even convinces you to indulge in a few games he himself plays

kuroo notices kenma has been smiling at his phone more lately

“new game?”

“no”

“ohoho? no game? is it a girl?~”

“y/n from karasuno”

kenma is so blunt dhfshdfgsdugsdfu

kuroo is sitting there like 👁💧👄💧👁

“you didn't tell me you had a girlfriend i thought we were best friends”

“she isn’t my girlfriend”

“do you want her to be though?”

kenma is silent 

you are the first girl he has actually felt comfortable with 

you guys have been friends for a good 3 months now 

maybe he did want you to be his girlfriend but he isn’t sure how to go about confessing 

one night the two of you are up playing animal crossing together 

it’s 2am and neither of you feel like sleeping 

you’re ready to go catch some fish but you check your mail box first and see a letter from kenma 

it says ‘come over to my island i have something to show you’

you notice kenma is online

when is he not online?

his gates are usually open around these hours for people selling turnips or whatever 

so you make your way over to kenma’s island and his little character is waiting fro you outside the airport

then he calls you over the phone to which you answer

the two of you are just casually talking and gently laughing with each other until kenma speaks up

“follow me”

he says quietly through the phone 

so your little animal crossing characters and running around the screen until kenma leads you to a patch of gold roses

gOLD ROSES hufgugfegbfgu rich boy tings 

“KENMA YOU DIDN’T TELL ME YOU GOT GOLD ROSES WTF??”

and in the middle of the patches of roses you see a personalised sign 

you guys know the ones im talking about right? the little boards you can make and decorate around your island 

n e ways 

‘y/n, will you be the cyrus to my reese’

that’s so fuckin cute ily kenma fhjdfd

so after you read it you have the biggest smile on your face

“of course i will kenma!”

he is smiling so hard rn 

ugh you’re official now yes bitches

hinata is e c s t a t i c when he find out 

kuroo is so mf smug but he’s so proud of kenma 

the first chance you get you go to visit tokyo to see your new boyfriend 

the two of you go to a cat cafe 

and then you guys are strolling through a park and feed the ducks 

and then you guys go back to kenma’s house for take out 

you’re both playing animal crossing, smash bros, mario kart etc 

at the start of the day kenma is so nervous  

but you make him feel so comfortable the nerves wash away

but anyways y’all are thriving playing your games 

kenma isn't huge on pda but he does acknowledge the fact you don’t get to see each other too often so he will be open to cuddling 

you’re resting your head on his shoulder while you play though

nothing to crazy you guys are taking it slow after all

your aunt lives in tokyo so you’ll be staying with her for the night

so neither of you have to worry about weirdos on the train at night 

so it gets to about 10:45 and you and kenma decide to call it a night 

this shy baby gives u a soft kiss before you go

he is so soft fjahfk

after that date there are many more to come 

as well as hinata’s matches you also some to watch kenma play whenever you can

the nekoma team love you

they’re so happy their precious kenma has finally found someone outside of volleyball who makes him happy 

you’re basically shared between both teams now 

nationals who are you gonna cheer for tho lmao 

i honestly think when kenma finds the right one he’ll stay with her 

like he doesn’t open up easily so when he knows he’s found the one he will absolutely feel more comfortable in opening up and being more vulnerable 

kenma wasn’t really bothered about love and relationships before 

but thanks to you he’s glad he stepped out his comfort zone

because besides the family he’s got in volleyball 

he also has you know 

and you’ve taught him a new form of love 

-

requests are open!!

[honeypwark]

[ Missing ]

  ↳ Roller Coaster era (late Jan-early Mar 2019)

       ↳ Lily goes missing. All hell brakes loose. Every idol ever tries to find Lily.

m.list

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

There’s a kind of contentment that comes with being absolutely exhausted. When you’re that tired, you know you’ve done your best and pushed yourself yet you’ve withstood the tiredness and given it your all. That’s usually how Lily feels after a long day of practicing. She’d be extremely tired, ready to drag herself home and flop into bed and start over the next day. But not today.

The exhaustion is there, wearing well into her bones but instead of feeling content, she just feels tired. She’s not even supposed to finish practicing for another hour and yet she is just so tired. Usually she pushes on through, telling herself the pain now is worth it in the end. But this doesn’t feel like the tired she’s used to. It’s so much concentrated, seeping into mind and making her just want to sleep.

She stumbles over her own feet again as she tries to work through the dance break at the end of her solo comeback song for the nth time. She takes a breath and bends over, coughing as she braces herself on her knees. She just feels completely wiped out; maybe she’s been pushing herself too hard? She wobbles over to the couch on the side of the room and sits down with a sigh.

“Okay, Lily. Take ten then we’re back,” she says to herself.

She coughs again, clearing her throat before settling further back into the couch and leaning her head back. All it takes is a few deep breaths with her eyes closed and she’s out like a light.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

“Lily Lee~ Unnie made you breakfast,” Nayeon sings gently as she enters the maknae line’s room.

The eldest member carries a plate of blueberry pancakes, Lily’s favorite. All of the members are well aware of how hard Lily is pushing herself to make her solo comeback go nothing less than perfect. They know she feels guilty for being given so many individual opportunities over her members despite all nine of their reassurances that they’re nothing but proud of her. Nayeon decided to surprise Lily with her favorite breakfast in bed.

“Li...ly?”

Nayeon doesn’t think she’s heard Lily get up this morning. Tzuyu and Dahyun are still asleep in their bunks and Chaeyoung is out to brunch with a friend. Lily’s bunk, however, is empty, save for Blue curled up in his usual spot at the foot of the bed. Nayeon leaves the room and her eyebrows only knit together further when she checks and finds the bathroom empty.

“Jihyo, do you know where Lily is?” Nayeon asks.

Jihyo, Sana, and Momo sit in the living room eating the extra pancakes Nayeon had made. (The best ones, of course, had been puts on Lily’s plate.) All three of them look up at Nayeon’s question.

“Is she not in her room?” Jihyo asks.

“No.”

“Bathroom?”

“Just checked.”

“She didn’t stay at Jisung’s dorm last night, did she?”

“No, she was practicing until late,” Momo reminds the leader.

“Did anyone hear her come in?”

“We all went to bed before her but maybe?” Sana says.

Jihyo glances around at the growing worry on her members’ faces.

“Okay, um, Sana. Go ask the others if they know where Lily is and whether or not they know she came home. Nayeon, put Lily’s plate in the microwave and finish cleaning up the kitchen. Momo, call Lily’s cell and see if she’ll pick up. I’ll call Jisung and see if she’s with him.”

The other three girls set off to do as they were told and Jihyo pulls out her phone. She quickly finds the right contact and calls Jisung. NCT Dream’s dorm is practically Lily’s second home. She is constantly spending the night there, the other group’s maknae never complaining to give up his bed to Lily for the night if it means getting to joke around while eating cereal together the next morning. If not for their endlessly busy idol lives, they would be attached at the hip.

“Uhhh... Jihyo sunbaenim? Hello.”

The boy who answers the phone is not Jisung.

“Hello, who is this?”

“I’m Jaemin, one of Jisung’s members.”

“Where is Jisung?”

“He’s showering but he should be out soon- oh, he’s right here.”

Muffled, Jihyo hears, “Hyung, why are using my phone?”

Louder and closer to the phone, Jaemin answers, “It’s Lily’s leader.”

“Jihyo?”

“Yeah.”

Jaemin presumably hands the phone to Jisung.

“Noona?”

“Jisung. Is Lily with you?”

“With me? No.”

“Oh, okay.”

“W-Why? Is she okay? Did something happen?”

Jaemin says something Jihyo can’t understand. The sound that follows sounds suspiciously like Jisung hitting his older member.

“We’re not sure where she is right now,” Jihyo answers.

She looks up as Sana, Nayeon, and Momo return to the living room, several of the other girls coming with them, all looking worried.

“Do you need help finding her? I can call her,” Jisung offers.

“No, it’s alright, Jisung. Thank you, though. Bye-”

“Wait! Will you let me know when you find her?” Jisung says quickly before she can hang up. “Or ask her to text me when she’s home?”

Jihyo blinks, “Uh, yeah. I’ll tell her to text you. Bye, Jisung.”

“Goodbye...”

Jihyo hangs up.

“She’s not with Jisung,” Jihyo announces to the others.

“My call went straight to voicemail,” Momo says, “Her phone’s either off or dead.”

“I don’t like this,” Mina says. “Lily always tells us when she’s staying with someone.”

“Yeah,” Tzuyu agrees quietly.

“What if something happened to her?”

“She might just be at ITZY’s dorm. They live a little closer to the company.”

“But what if something did happen to her?”

“She was walking home late at night; someone should have gone to get her.”

“She’s so little.”

“If someone tried to grab her in an empty street she wouldn’t be able to do much.”

“What if someone recognized her?”

“What if she got kidnapped?!”

“What if she got followed by a sasaeng!?”

“Guys... GUYS!” Jihyo calls to get everyone’s attention. “Worrying like this isn’t going to help anyone. I’ll stay here with Sana in case she comes back. You all split up and start trying to find her.“

While the others hurry to pull on coats and shoes and throw their hair up into ponytails, Sana walks over to Jihyo.

“What are we going to do?” Sana asks.

“We’re going to start calling people,” Jihyo answers. “Anyone Lily knows and we don’t, we’re going to figure out their phone number and call them.”

“How are we going to do that? Like, I don’t have any of Blackpink’s phone numbers.”

“Well... okay. But you know Nayeon. And Nayeon knows Jisoo. Find connections like that.”

A few minutes later, Jihyo has gotten Blackpink’s eldest’s phone number and been told she’s not with them. Nonetheless, Jihyo tries to remember another one of Lily’s countless idol friends to try and call.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

What had gone from a ten minute break to a nearly nine hour night of sleep leaves Lily still fast asleep on the couch of a practice room that morning. She’s shifted onto her side, curled up and sleeping soundly. She wakes slowly, blinking and groaning at the bright overhead lights still shining from the night before. She eventually sits up and rubs the final remnants of sleep from her eyes. Her phone is dead, she realizes, getting the time from the clock on the wall instead.

10:13AM? Really? She was asleep that long? She’s almost surprised her body let her sleep for so long; she usually can’t make it past seven hours of consecutive sleep. She knows her members must be worried sick about her not being home after being alone the night before. She should head home right away to let them know she’s okay. As she pulls her coat on, she hopes her members aren’t worrying too bad.

Unbeknownst to her, the members of Day6 and Stray Kids are scouring the entire company building for her. Nearly the entire kpop idol community has become aware of Twice’s missing maknae as Jihyo and Sana have continued calling more and more people. If there was ever a day to run into an idol somewhere in Seoul, today would be that day as anyone who is able to is out looking for Lily.

“Come on, idiot, don’t actually be missing,” Jae mutters to himself as he starts checking in and out of practice rooms.

Despite Jae’s mean older brother act, it’s obvious and impossible to deny that he cares about the younger American. He’s always teasing her about her height but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t know how easily someone bigger than her could grab her and force her into a car or down an alleyway or-

“Lily!”

Jae spots Lily leaving a practice room further down the hall. The girl turns toward him.

“Oh, hey-“

Jae crashes into Lily in a hug, squeezing her tightly.

“Okay. Hi, there.” She pats his back as she hugs him back, confused as he usually only briefly hugs her in parting, “Is today a special occasion or...?”

“You are an absolute dumbass, Lilliana Lee!” Jae yells at her, smacking the side of her head.

“OW! What was that for?!” she whines.

“Your members have no idea where you are!” Jae exclaims. “They think you’ve been kidnapped or killed or something and have everyone you’ve ever even looked at for more than five seconds looking for you.”

“W-What?“

“They woke up and you weren’t at the dorm and you weren’t answering their calls so they started calling people to see if you were with them and now every idol ever is searching the entirety of Seoul for you but you’ve just been in a practice room?!!”

“I fell asleep! I didn’t mean to!”

“You can’t just disappear like that!” Jae continues to scold her. “You’ve got so many people worried over nothing and- shit.”

Jae turns away from Lily and covers his eyes.

“Are you-,” Lily steps around him to look at his face, “Are you crying?”

“No,” he says firmly.

“I think you are.”

He glares at her, “I’m still mad at you.”

She steps back with her hands raised, “My bad.”

He sighs, “Alright. Let’s get you home.”

“Okay,” Lily agrees softly.

She lets Jae lead her down the hall, coughing into her elbow before entering the elevator. Jae already has his phone out, texting his members to stop their search because he’s found her.

“Are you sick?” he asks.

“I just think I need some water,” she says.

“You should take some medicine when you get home, just in case.”

“Aw, you do care about me. The only tsundere I know is Jae Park.”

Jae shoves his phone into her hands, “Shut up and call Jeongyeon. You get to deal with her wrath.”

Lily looks at Jeongyeon’s contact that has been pulled up on Jae’s phone and gulps.

[blu-joons]

DATING ATEEZ A⇴Z HEADCANON ⇴  Kim Hongjoong

A⇴ AFFECTION 

Whenever Hongjoong is around you, his priority is always to make sure that you’re protected in his affection. Even if no one else is around, he’ll still like to make sure that you always feel safe underneath his touch and in his presence.

B ⇴ BEFORE DATING 

Several of the other members had caught onto him staring across at you as you worked at the company, eventually he was pushed into introducing himself to you. When a figure stumbled into your path, anger boiled inside of you, but as soon as you saw how apologetic the guy was, all was quickly forgiven.

C ⇴ CONFESSION 

You knew on a date at the fair, as soon as you saw a stall with minion toys on it, Hongjoong would want to win. However, when he did, and made sure he won the biggest toy that they did, gifting the toy to you, you knew he was up to something. He wasn’t the best when it came to using words and love, so he just hoped that the toy would be enough to tell you how he felt about you, and thankfully for him, it was.

D ⇴ DATES 

With so much of his time spent working and at the studio, you’ll often set up dates at the studio to work around his busy schedule. You’ll try and squeeze as much time out of him as possible, and even though sometimes these dates can barely last an hour, you always make sure to treasure the fact that you have time to spend with Hongjoong, however long or short it is. Whilst he gives his music a break, the two of you will sit on the floor, usually with food between the two of you, and catch up on your days and weeks.

E ⇴ EXPERIENCE 

Before dating you, Hongjoong had no real expectation of what being a relationship would be like, however there was one thing that he was certain of, the fact he wanted to still be a good leader and set a good example to the other members about what being in a relationship entailed. The work and personal life balance was key for Hongjoong, especially with so much of his time spent working on music and composing, so once the two of you figured that out and understood each other, the biggest problem was already solved.

F ⇴ FIGHTING 

At times Hongjoong can be very serious, which you know comes from his role as a leader and his dedication to get things done. However, sometimes that strictness that he finds himself using at work, can translate at home, often crossing a few of the boundaries between you both. You often have to remind Hongjoong of who he’s speaking too, reminding him that he’s not at work and capable of bossing people about, and that you’ll get things done when you’re ready. As soon as he realises the way in which he’s spoken to you though, he’ll always make sure to apologise and make up for the things he said.

G ⇴ GETTING TO KNOW HIS FAMILY 

It was an accident the first time you met his family, dropping by at the studio, you didn’t expect to see his elder brother there. However, it ended up working in your favour, seeing that you were caring for Hongjoong and making sure that he ate was a big tick on his brother’s list, and his family’s as well.

H ⇴ HOME 

A lot of the time, Hongjoong will be at yours when he’s not busy with work. Whilst he loves being at the dorm, he loves the escape that your apartment brings too, to be able to enjoy some peace and quiet and be well looked after in your company is normally all that he wants, not too much for him to ask for at all.

I ⇴ “I LOVE YOU” 

He’d been working incredibly hard for a couple of weeks, so much so that you barely saw him at all. So, when you visited the studio late at night in the hope that you’d be able to check in on him, Hongjoong couldn’t hide how relieved he was to see you when you knocked on the door, hugging you tightly whilst uttering those special words.

J ⇴ JEALOUSY 

Whilst Hongjoong isn’t someone who can get jealous too often, if someone begins to make him feel on edge, his face will definitely give him away. His responses will get a lot shorter, and his reactions will be incredibly basic, making sure it’s subtly clear to the room that he’s not enjoying himself. Whilst everyone else can usually brush it off just as Hongjoong being Hongjoong, you know a bit more as to what’s going on, typically having to bring him to one side to remind him that there’s no need for him to worry.

K ⇴ KIDS 

Hongjoong hasn’t spent years as the dad of the group for no reason, confident he’d have enough experience even if the two of you became parents tomorrow. Whilst he doesn’t want to rush for the real thing, he loves to tease you and remind you that he’s already a dad of several members who rely on him for most things. Although as you tease him too, the members are nothing like how the real thing will be.

L ⇴ LAUGHTER 

When Hongjoong allows himself to relax and have a laugh, he very much becomes an unstoppable force. You love knowing when he’s comfortable, and when the dorkier side of him comes out, the side that doesn’t really know what he’s saying and will often do stupid things too. Hongjoong knows you love this side of him too, because you know work isn’t giving him any stress, and that you can laugh with him and know he’ll be able to laugh at your side too. Whilst for the most part he’s serious about his work, around you, Hongjoong feels a lot more confident to let those barriers down and relax a little too.

M ⇴ MISSING 

He’ll always try and be the strong leader that the others need when they’re on the road, because he knows that the others get homesick too. However, the other members are also aware of the close bond the two of you have and how much that Hongjoong relies on you. They can tell that he’s trying to smile through it all, but after a couple of weeks, they’ll reassure him that it’s alright for him to feel too, and that they’d think he was crazy if he wasn’t missing you. Secretly, they all miss you too, whilst their dad is on the road with them, not having their mum to care for them too is no fun for them either.

N ⇴ NICKNAMES 

Hongjoong loves to give you musical names, he’ll often come up behind you and whisper, ‘my little melody,’ or something similar into your ear, reminding you that alongside music, you’re one of his favourite things in the world.

O ⇴ OBSESSION 

He’s obsessed with your hands, even though he has small hands of his own, to feel how small your hands are in his hold always brings a smile to Hongjoong’s face.

P ⇴ PDA 

Whenever the two of you are out in public, Hongjoong’s priority is to always keep you protected and out of any harm. He knows what fans and the media can be like, and whilst you often try to reassure him that you can handle yourself, Hongjoong would never forgive himself if something happened whilst at his side.

Q ⇴ QUESTIONS 

He loves to get your opinion on his creations, even though most of the time you don’t really have a clue what all of the technical stuff means. Secretly as well, Hongjoong loves being able to show off to you just how talented he is.

R ⇴ RANDOM FACTS 

It was only when you visited Hongjoong’s room for the first time, did you realise just how minion obsessed he actually was. It became a bit of a habit for yours after that, that any time the two of you celebrated an occasion or a milestone, you’d always buy him at least one gift that was minion related in order to add to his collection, and make sure he knew just how sweet of an obsession you thought it was too.

S ⇴ SEX 

Above all else, Hongjoong always makes sure to care for you whenever the two of you are intimate with each other. Your needs are always put before his at the best of times, but especially so when the two of you are in the bedroom. Hongjoong never likes to rush, he loves to take his time and pay attention to all of the little details, as you’d expect from a man as talented and dedicated as Hongjoong was.

T ⇴ TEXTS 

You’ll often be disturbed at work by texts from Hongjoong to let you know he’s organised plans for you both that evening, whether it’s a date night, or catching up with friends, he loves to be as social as possible with you.

U ⇴ UNIVERSE 

Whilst every person went through hard times, especially as the leader too, knowing that he always had you there to support him through those hard times was an indescribable comfort for Hongjoong that he’d always be grateful for.

V ⇴ VACATION 

He always told you how keen he was to travel with his members, and not have to worry about work. So, when you found out they’d arranged a trip, you were more than pleased for them. But that wasn’t enough for Hongjoong, surprising you on the morning of the trip, with a suitcase packed, and no hints as to what would happen next.

W ⇴ WHINING 

As the father of the group, Hongjoong’s used to listening to the others moan, and so he’ll never annoy you with the habits that all of his members tend to do.

X ⇴ XXXXX 

Every kiss that comes from Hongjoong is always incredibly soft against your skin, and very sweet too. If he gets a reaction out of you when he kisses you, it’ll always make him turn incredibly shy and nervous. He loves to come up behind you and take you by surprise, or if he can tell you’re anxious, he’ll be there with a kiss against your blushed cheeks to remind you not to worry and that he’s there for you too.

Y ⇴ YOU 

You were his biggest support, always at his side whenever he needed to call on you.

Z ⇴ ZZZ 

It’s quite often that Hongjoong will end up having to sleep at the studio, and so you made sure to create a bag filled with things that he’d need to make sure he was as comfortable as possible when you weren’t able to be with him.

---

Masterlist

[partnersatfazbear]

Fazbear Frights: What We Found Analysis

Here’s my analysis for What We Found, the third story in Gumdrop Angel. I wrote this as I read so it may be a little different than my previous analysis where I read the story first and went back.

If you’re a Michael Afton fan I highly recommend this. Also, there’s possibly some insight into William Afton, Mrs. Afton, and Henry too, so it’s worth a skim.

Pg 144 '...a place thirty-some years forgotten' Just reconfirming FNAF 3 is 30 years past *one* of the FNAF closings, presumably FNAF 2 location.

Pg 145 "The whole building was giving him [Hudson] a headache." FIX THE VENTILATION BRUH

Pg 148 '...they were able to use salvaged derelict equiptment original to the old pizzerias.' Another confirmation of something we heard from Phone Guy.

Pg 147 "How old are you?" "Twenty-three, same as you." I think this gives us Michael's age during FNAF 3.

EDIT: This kept me awake last night. Obviously this is impossible because he has to be alive for at least 10 years before 1983, BUT maybe its just reconfirming FNAF 3′s year? 2023?

Pg 149 "Hudsan's dad died and his mom married Lewis, a ridiculous balding man who wore plaid vests and smoked a pipe" Did... Did this book just seriously imply Mrs. Afton left William for Henry? Really? (Yes, there's differences; the husband is dead and the man wears plaid 'vests' but it seems very odd to include that detail. This could just have been the writer's own imagination, though.) I have seen this as a fan theory and 100% explains the jealousy aspect of William, but I can't help but kinda hate it. I think this is very important, though, and probably Scott's intention. "This horrible little man [Lewis]... would make Hudson's next ten years a living Hell" This REALLY intrigues me given the context I just went over. The text implies Lewis was fairly neglectful to our main character / Michael stand-in Hudson. Maybe I'm wrong and for some reason Mrs. Emily left and went to William? XD Haha, I'm reading too much into this page. Maybe I'll come back to this later. I figure it's more of Scott possibly including double-details (contradicting stuff with the same character that really applies to two, which has been something I heavily pointed out in previous anaylsis on this blog) Having said that, I'm going w/the former because I can't imagine Henry being abusive (neglectful yes, abusive no) and he's never been portrayed that way in official works like William has in the novels.

Pg 150 "Hudson began to screw up in class...a product of spending the night in fear that his stepfather [Lewis]... [would] beat him just for the fun of it." Ooof. Big confirm on William actually being abusive. Unless we stick with the Henry theory for Lewis (combined with Midnight Motorist Henry theory / alcoholic). "...near-daily beatings..." "his mom started taking pills to get through the day..." So, whoever Mrs. Afton is, she was definetly not paying attention. But then, most people married to serial killers either don't notice because of denial (like this) or because the killer is so manipulative / careful they can't notice.

"Barry, who had red hair and freckles..." Yo?! Is that a description of Fritz?! These friends in the story could be the other kids Michael knew's stand-in's, aka the two gravestones with names he used (Fritz and Jeremy), as shown in the checks for the games and FNAF 6. I've long figured Michael was probably friends with the victims--it makes them easier, although riskier, targets [for William]. The two friends are male, too, like Fritz and Jeremy. If you're curious about Duane's description (our stand in for Jeremy), it's "tight black shirt... muscles... black hair long enough for a glossy ponytail..." I'm not sure if this matches anything found in the novels or contradicts them, though. (The novels = TSE trilogy)

"And so it went... until the night of the fire." For context, this is before FF burns down. We're learning of Hudson's life from his close friends in childhood, his father's death, his mother remarrying, to his abusive stepfather, to his grades slipping to this line. This would be a new fire not seen/mentioned in the games...

Pg 151 "...go to Charlie's for a sundae..." Really. Really Scott. Just gonna use this name again. OK. I'm not even gonna discuss this because it's probably irrelevant. *This is confirmed on pg 158 to be an ice cream shop. No lore relevance aside the annoying name coincidences Scott loves to troll with.

"This is not... an advance into enemy territory, a fight with demons, or a descent into Hell..." Uh, what? What is Hudson talking about? XD I'm only noting it because it seems so out of place. He's probably talking about video games or something.

Another note, although I don't have a specific reference since it is mentioned off-hand many times, is that Hudson keeps referring to his "history" which is implied to have kept him from getting a well-paying job and a girl he's crushing on doesn't know this "history" which is good for him. Seems good old "Michael Stand-In" has done some jail time or something. Edit: On pg 154/155 the girl asks Hudson, "Did you do it?" Seems he may have killed his stepfather or been involved with something else just as bad. Edit 2: No, I was thinking too deep into it. This probably refers to Evan's death at Fredbear's. DUH.

Pg 156 describes an actual "prize corner" in FF! What am I even reading? IIRC this is in FNAF 3, too. So they just hand out these scary gift boxes to people that complete the attraction? (Hudson says he *would* have fun handing out the scary toys to kids when this location opens--kind of a bully thing to do, eh?)

"[Hudson] avoid[ed] glancing in any of the mirrors..." I'm only pointing this out because it could be reference to one of two things. 1) We know because of one of UCN's music tracks, William has a fear of his reflection. Michael probably shares this trait, especially since 2) after Ennard and all... and later on pg 157 it also says, "he never wanted to face: himself" Sounds like guilt, my guy.

Pg 157 "blonde hair... blue eyes..." Hudson shares an eye color with Michael. It's possible Michael had blonde hair as a child and it changed to brown (it's common, something I personally went through being technically blonde/ blue eyed myself)

"He [Hudson] knew from personal experience that toys could turn from fun...to torture ina heart-beat" Fairly self explanatory. Either Hudson's worked at a creepy location before or he doesn't like remembering Fredbear's.

*checks how much is left.* There's still 35 pages (not counting back/front) left of this... This is gonna be a lot of notes.

Pg 158 Hudson doesn't have a car. Poor Mike, probably having to walk everywhere. Especially as a corpse.

Pg 160 This page describes many physical issues Hudson has that prevents him from entering the Navy, all from the abuse of Lewis. Obvious paralell to Michael becoming an undead [because his father sent him to CBPR indirectly causing his condition]

Pg 161 "How's your granny, Hud?... ...Is she still alive?" "I don't think she can die." Does anyone in the Afton family really 'die'? XD

Pg 162 These few pages discuss Hudson's grandmother. She's described as "a seer who claimed to know the future... ...wore big men's plaid flannel shirts with baggy jeans" Um, more plaid / flannel? AGH. STAHP. Lowkey, I would totally headcanon my Aunt Jen like this, though.

Pg 163 "Hudson's mom... the way she was before Hudson's dad had died... never... particularly warm and fuzzy... but... effiencient and responsible..." More about Mrs. Afton, so that's kinda neat.

"Hudson's dad was fun and attentive." There's a good Dad in this series?

"Unfortunetly, he also struggled with mental illness." "invisible low points" (Pg 164) Kinda reminds me of how Henry is described after Charlotte's death in the books.

Pg 164 "When Steven got himself into a bad deal that cost him his small business... he'd taken his life." Oh, it is Henry! SMH. Way to use confusing paralells. So, from our understanding thus far, Hudson's real father, Steven, is our Henry stand-in. His step-father despite being described similar to Henry, is actually our William stand-in. Fair game, Scott.

Pg 164 "...he [Hudson] was locked into a supply closet..." Oh shit, you guys. So, let me go on a tangent here, because this IS important! I just watched a retrospective on Sister Location and FNAF 6 earlier and one theory for Midnight Motorist was the person in the chair was the mother and the kid was Michael. I think this little line may confirm that. In fact, the story may be the key to figuring things out. Obviously, the line is a paralell to FNAF 4's scene in which Crying Child was locked in the supply closet of Fredbear's. I know some people, including Matpat, believe[d] CC was Michael, and in this book's context, it sort of works. This does contradict Step Closer and 1000 other things that make Michael the older brother, but maybe it's hinting at MM? Abusive stepdad (possibly Henry... maybe William is gone at this point), checked out Mom (hey, grey couch lady with Foxybro's font). IDK, but its definetly something to think about.

Pg 165 Lewis is mentioned as calling Hudson "nothing" and saying "you're nothing" on several occasions on this page. Just more abuse, for those accurate fanfic writers like me. Also I kinda wanna watch Morel Orel again. Yall know my fav character is Clay. Yall know.

"You're smoke." <-- Lewis / The text later reads, "...there was some irony, given what eventually happened." BRUH. Why did your stepdad die in a fire? :V TELL ME.

"When his family's house burned down at the end of his senior year..." Huh. Is there a fire we don't know about in the game-verse? Could this explain what happened to the FNAF 4 house before MM house?!

"...it purged Hudson of Lewis and his mother." MRS. AFTON BURNED ALIVE, TOO? Bruh. I can't with this story.

The text later describes the fire is concluded to be man-made and Hudson was blamed for it. Can't say if this ties to Michael, but it IS interesting... TBF, there is a small paralell to draw between Henry in FNAF 6 and his history of suicide in the books, too.

Pg 166 "...this place's [FF] busted thermostat.." I just find this line funny.

Pg 167 "...after three weeks of keeping an eye on the place" Some more timeline context for FNAF 3. We know that Michael worked there a little while before we start playing the game thanks to one of the phone calls, IIRC, so this makes sense. If Michael was accused of [something] and also wanting to hunt down his father, then it makes perfect sense why he's working a dead end job at Freddy's over and over and over. Fun fun fun.

Pg 169 "He hated to think about a functional character [Foxy]" This line is in regards to Hudson not liking the set up of Pirate's Cove and Foxy's hook to scare people. Sounds familiar, don't it? (For Michael anyway.)

Pg 173 "Some big find is arriving tomorrow." SPRINGY BOI! COME ON BOOK, get on with the show?

Pg 176 "Granny was wearing a red-and-green plaid shirt and her baggy jeans." Nothing special, but it was specifically brought up twice. I'm kind of racking my brain trying to understand what the point of this character is outside of "woooo everything is haunted don't you know that" kind of character.

Pg 180 "...dropped the crate on the linoleum with a resounding thud." HEY. Poor Springtrap, just gettin' tossed around like the trash he is.

Pg 186 "If you weren't so stupid, I'd tell you more about it." Springtrap bringing the burn. =:)

"A voice with a burr-like rasp...hint of a Southern accent" I'm going to assume this is because it's Lewis probably in the suit in this story and not our old British lad.

"It's was Mr. Atkin's voice." THE MATH TEACHER? *goes back to check* 'The algebra teacher'. Okay...

Pg 190 Okay, so Hudson hear's Lewis' voice this time. Okay, I get it now. Springtrap in this kind of imbodies all of Hudson's old bullies, including the teacher. He also has PTSD, just FYI. IDK if anyone finds that important, but it's fairly obvious by the line "He wasn't in his bedroom. Lewis didn't just slam his head into a desk; his head had been slammed into the [arcade] game."

"Why did he hallucinate a scene from his childhood?" Oh, it's not PTSD, then. It's just the VENTILATION ERROR. lol Okay.

Just a note, as I'm reading through the more action-based stuff, I kind of feel bad for Michael if he had flashbacks like this guy. They're intense.

So, Lewis' voice finally comes out of Springtrap on Pg 213. There's that.

Pg 220 "You can just stay there [in his room]" Kind of a paralell to Midnight Motorist. Lewis is saying it to Hudson. I really feel like the kid in the MM game is Michael because of this story...

Pg 223 "Heat purges. Fire heals." I'm sure that's Henry's life motto.

The ending was stupid, but most in these stories are. Hudson is hallucinating and is implied to have burned himself alive in FF's oven. Meh? The first half of this one is A TRIP and a little insight into what I 100% believe is Michael's childhood. I think the saddest part of it all is that we never got Springtrap speaking to Michael in FNAF 3--and if it's ever remade I hope we get more of them interacting.