#i love you guys im glad you stuck around through all of my cringeness back then

[hakusins]

{ Me, having followed you since day one on all your previous blogs: "Dean is such a cute little bean. 💕"

Me now, watching you talk about getting men pregnant and horny posting 24/7: "Dean is such a cute AND horny bean. 💕"

Nobody can say that I haven't watched you grow from the time you were young as hell into the little creature you are now. Also, on the blonde topic, can't say if it counts or not for you, but I know for a fact that Eri likes blondes since you shipped him with my Mika before. 🤔 }

EBHRFHBERFBHJ OMG SPEKA UWEEHHH !!!!!! oh god that really reminds me how some of my mutuals on here have known me since my cringe phase oh my god. IM SO SORRY

BUT THANK YOU UWEH, honestly its so funny how so many of my old mutuals don't even question how i went from lil shy dean bean to the hyperactive horny dean bean now. but i'm glad you guys are still around !!! jHBERJFEFHBJERF also I always wanted to make men pregnant, its just that all of my adult moots at the time would quickly distract me with angst and fluff -3- HBJREFHJERF

BUT YEAH I WONT COMPLAIN ABOUT THAT!!! Eri is 100% a blond fucker okay. Like his relationship with Mika chan is already proof enough that this man has a thing for blonds!!! There's no complaining no contest no nothing about that. BUT I AM PERSONALLY NOT A BLOND FUCKER !!! SPEKA YOU NEED TO BELIEVE ME !!!!!!!

[beautiful-is-boring]

Through the phone

Gojo satoru x Fem!Reader (she/her) | Fluff, very minimal angst if you squint, JJK MANGA SPOILERS

Summary: Gojo, your crush, rambles on and on about you, unaware that you're listening.

writing this was an impulsive decision so if this ends up being bad or cringe or if i make gojo ooc on accident im so sorry lol

"SHOKO IERI" Gojo's loud and booming voice startled his friend who was speaking to someone on the phone, causing her to yelp.

"hold on dear gimme a moment" she said to the person on the other side "satoru what the fuck?"

"I have so much to tell you about y/n!" he said to her with gleaming eyes that were covered by his blindfold, but shoko could easily tell he had heart eyes, since the topic was about you, his crush.

"not now! can't you see im talking to someone?"

"no. I will stay here and say whatever I want, and you will listen, and if that person wants they can listen too because y/n is just one of a kind okay? They also need to know about how cool she is!"

Shoko smirked to herself. Gojo would ramble on about you, and sometimes, he would sit quiet thinking of you; but he never made a move. You didn't either. Both of you were shy, stupid, dumbfucks who were afraid of rejection and attachment, even though you both wanted each other (her words, not mine)

She could have cut the call, but she didn't. She had a trick up her sleeve. It was you on the other end after all; and her long time friend didn't know that.

"go on ;)"

"so..." satoru began "i cannot stress this enough, and i know i said this loads of times before, but her smile is EVERYTHING. And her laugh? HEAVENLY. She could smile and giggle and boom! depression doesn't exist anymore! And everytime she smiles at me or I make her laugh I can feel myself BLUSHING and going RED but obviously she can't know that so I laugh it off saying its the heat, and I am so glad it is summer right now because that girl is really smart. Her brain is so hot. But she's dumb and oblivious a lot of times and its hilariously cute."

'Her smile is everything.' 'I can feel myself blushing.' 'Her brain is hot.' What the fuck? You could hear everything he was saying to shoko through your phone. Blushing profusely, your eyes widened automatically. This was Gojo, your crush, and an egoistical bastard. He would never admit any of the things he was unapologetically saying at the very moment. You knew your feelings were reciprocated yet you continued to listen to know what he actually thought of you.

"Like- she's so pretty its illegal." He continued gushing on about you while Shoko silently snickered to her self and you froze completely.

"Honestly? She's so badass and doesn't give a shit about anything else but she's so caring. I saw her help this small kid in the park whose balloon was stuck on a tree and she helped him get the balloon back, and I instantly fell in love. You already know sweet she is with the students, they love her! AND SHE MAKES SPECIAL CHOCOLATES FOR ME! How cool is that! She..." his voice quietened down a bit "she makes me feel special shoko. She makes me feel loved. She cares about me a lot. Its just a different kind of feeling. But im scared, I don't want to lose her. You-you know what happened to getou- i cant-"

He took in a heavy breath and paused for a second "I dont want to lose her in any way. What if they target her because of me? I know she's so damn strong, nothing can touch her. But that 1% still remains. Or what if she doesn't reciprocate my feelings? Her and I are close friends and i don't want to lose that too. And on top of that I am busy and I am a hard guy to be with."

"well, what do you want to do?" Shoko asked him with a softer smile.

"I..I think i'm gonna stop. She deserves better if im being honest. She needs someone who can pamper her and give her time. I am done-"

"Satoru?"

Your shaky voice could be heard from shoko's phone.

Gojo froze and everything around him went quiet. You. It was you, the one only y/n, on the phone. The one he was in love with. The one he just rambled on and on about to his friend, and you heard every single word. He could feel his mind go hay-wire. He wanted the earth to swallow him whole from the embarrassment. He wanted to go to some foreign country, dig a hole, crawl in it and die. He felt vulnerable, panicked and so much more.

"Satoru? Are you still there?" your voice broke the silence, drawing his attention to you.

He decided to get it over with.

"heyyyy y-y/n? hehe listen don-don't worry about it i-i was just joking- i mean i was n-not- but you don-t have to take me seriously like i-i respect your feelings and if you don't return them t-that is okay but please lets still be friends but i was hoping for-"

"Satoru...please, tell me the truth. Please tell me you're not joking."

With a heavy sigh, he spoke into shoko's phone. "Y/n, I like you. 'I am in love with you' would be a better choice of words, but I don't want to be awkward, it feels as if I'm going too fast. Look, its okay if you don't like me back, and I completely get it; but I have hidden my feelings for a really long time now, and I just wanna say that I will always be by your side, protecting you, supporting you, being the bestfriend that you need during hard times."

"Why do I need you as my bestfriend to support me when you can do the same while being my boyfriend?"

w h a t

Gojo satoru's eyes widened and his mouth hung open. What the hell did you just say to him? "...what? y-y/n what are you saying?"

"I..I wanted to confess my feelings for you for so damn long but I was scared to lose you. I think we both were." you giggled softly and gojo could feel his heart swell. "Satoru, I like you too. I like you so so so much."

"I can't believe it!" he whispered.

"I'm in my office room. Meet me now." That was all you said before you hung up. Gojo could hear the nervousness from your voice, while keeping in mind that he was very nervous too, and he probably gave it away because of his stuttering at the start. He felt butterflies in his stomach, partly from his nervousness and partly from the happiness he felt from receiving your confession.

He looked at shoko with shocked eyes.

"Don't be a wimp and just go to her." Shoko responded to his look, and smiled. "You'll be fine."

Gojo took a deep breath in, then out, and then teleported himself to your office.

His eyes fell on you the moment he stepped foot in that room. You were seated on a big couch that you owned, looking ethereal as ever in the golden rays of the sun that entered into the room through your open windows. Gojo couldn't help but blush at how beautiful you looked, even while being so nervous, and he could feel his heart do a backflip when you gave him a soft smile with a small "hi".

"hi." he replied back, not knowing what to say. His awkward stance was adorable.

"you look really cute when you're flustered." Your compliment made him smile as you both walked towards each other. It was not normal for THE Gojo satoru to be this soft, this flustered, the reason being a person.

"and you, my darling, you...look absolutely adorable when you smile." you both chuckled lightly as he booped your nose with his finger, drinking in the sight of you smiling. "...is it too early to call you darling-?"

"no no it isn't!...I like it." It was your turn to blush now. "What nickname do I use for you?" You tiptoed and wrapped your arms around his neck, feeling his arms go around your waist, gazing into his ocean like eyes twinkling behind the glasses.

"Anything. What do you want to call me?"

"'Toru'. How does that sound?"

"Don't ever call me anything other than that." was all he said before he leaned down and softly placed his lips over yours, feeling a different kind of happiness for the first time in forever.

------------------------------

Taglist: @narcwhore @bollywoodgrandma @vampire-rat-bastard @levis-hazelnut

[void-selfships-archive]

Ok I just FINALLY finished bojack horseman after taking a very long break from it cuz it was not good for my depression BUT!!! I was strong enough to finish it and I’ve followed this blog for years and I know you self ship with bojack but I don’t think I’ve ever seen a post explaining how you fit into that world?? Like, what’s your role, how did you and bojack meet, how does your story grow along with the others? AND!! Woooo, “the view from halfway down” episode was. Wow. How would you/your s/i (idk which one you use) react to all that? Are YOU maybe the one bojack calls instead of Diane? Do you/your s/i have their own “view from halfway down” episode? Sorry if this is a lot but I’m back into this show now and I’d love to know your role in the whole thing. :)

SOBBING CRYING SHAKING RN HOLY SHIT YOU DONT UNDERSTAND HOW EXCITED I GOT SEEING THIS FJEJCJEJXJS

Also i get having to take breaks with this show bc if you aren't doing well it will NOT be good for you fjekwjcje I'm on my 4th (5th?) Rewatch rn after like a year (it's a comfort show) [ALSO VIEW FROM HALFWAY DOWN POG??? <- (my top favorite episode)]

BUT ALSO IM. SO GLAD YOU ASKED BC I HAVE SO MUCH LORE FOR THIS MFCKER AND IM TOO NERVOUS TO TALK ABT IT WITHOUT BEING PROMTED !!!

I'm gonna put everything under the cut for SPOILER REASONS but also PLEASE read the tags just in case!!! We're talking abt the mfckin CANON timeline I have for my self insert shits depressing as hell (also I hope I generally explained everything fjejcjdh bad at doing that smtimes)

I'm almost glad I'm not talking abt the Childhood friends au bc its SO softcore like wheres the angst bestie? But also damn. Why all the angst in the canon tl? Chill OUT /lh

Generally the canon tl follows the show pretty accurately, aside from the fact that IM there and a few things r obviously different

I met him in a bar during the 90s! It was one of those "Oh we're both actors! Pog." And we basically drank together and trauma-bonded. They quickly become good friends (It was funny, considering the first thing we said to eachother was "oh you look familiar" and "YOU'RE THAT GUY FROM THAT SHOW I WATCH!" Truly the start of a wonderful friendship.)

And, I basically stayed around him. The Whole Time- through Herb getting fired and both of our shows ending and various depressive episodes (on both ends), parent funerals and hallowern parties and benders and awful horrible shows that definitely should never be mentioned nor have been put on air.

And weird one night stands with eachother that never get brought up the next day (or at all for that matter) just to keep things from being weird.

So I've known him for awhile, and I've stuck around for awhile, basically a ride or die friend (with a tiny little crush that I'm not acknowledging) that's my role, the Yearning Best Friend- so cringe but it works out in the end.

I think, major event wise, everything still happened the same. It's right until S4 when things are, a little different? (Not by much though)

When he heads to his old family summer home he invites me to come with (I also didn't think itd be smart to leave him alone) and through that entire trip he told me about Horsin Around and his family and at a point a drunken rant abt New Mexico that neither of us remembered in the morning. (It was a bonding trip, definitely the start of Feelings too) we start dating in the middle of that season (specifically when we all got trapped underground, you confess a lot when you think you're going to die)

So naturally, S5 is different too, he's not dating Gina in that season, but everything still happens the same otherwise. (Of course I knew something was off the whole time, you don't stay friends with someone for several years and NOT notice when something's off, motherfucker wouldnt *talk* to me though, and when he did it was to tell me someone was trying to sabotage the show and of course you cant have two paranoid mfers under the same roof, they just end up fueling eachother until it's too late and something horrible happens)

And something horrible happened, and Diane told me about what she thought happened in New Mexico, and I'm thinking "I feel like I've heard this story before." And then Bojack tells me what happened in New Mexico and then he choked his co-star and hes going to rehab and everything is obviously too much and I tell him I can't visit of course, because theres a lot of information i need to process, but I'll still write and I'll still text and watch over the house while he's gone since I practically live there at this point but I cant see him rn.

And I didn't! Until he got out of rehab, of course and it was back to "Bojack and Jackson against the world!" And "Let's move! Go somewhere different get a change of scenery!" And we did. He got that job at the university and I! Stayed with him, ever the loyal boyfriend. (Until in getting calls from a reporter and suddenly we're trying to figure out what shitty thing he did before the reporter calls and Oh. It's about Sarah Lynn and Oh!! Thus is certainly new information I wasn't told about! Fuck.)

After the interview- the second one- it was...complicated. I didn't want to leave but i also recognized that i needed to. For now, to let him deal with the aftermath of his mistakes because if he came to me- and he did- he'd be looking for reassurances I couldn't give him. We got into a really bad argument, it was moreso implied that we weren't dating anymore, neither of us said it but we both walked away and that was the last time we spoke.

It's so funny that you asked abt The View From Halfway Down because I was literally just thinking about that episode the other day and if he would've called me and not Diane and honestly! Yea. He did! Tho he called me. Twice that day, once before, after he left Angela's house, and again before he got back in the pool- I picked up the first time but he was pretty much incomprehensible and I couldn't pick up the second time so when I called back and he didn't answer I was. Quick to panic. (I was right for being worried too, all things considered)

And then he went to jail. And we didn't see eachother again until PC's wedding (bonded a lot with her, during that break up period. It was hard y'know? But she got it. Also I was Helping Babysit with Todd, she was rlly making me rethink my opinion on adopting a kid)

We didn't start dating right away tho, but we did start hanging out again? So that was a bonus!

[trivia-bangtan]

after (jjk) - 005

pairing: patient!oc x patient!jungkook

genre: friends to lovers au, kinda a hazel and gus trope, | lots of angst, fluff and suggestive themes

warning: this chapter gets extremely dark 😭 (nothing new lol)

authors note: omfg im so sorry it’s taken me so long to post 😩 the schedule might change from now on bc my schedule changed 😅 but hope u guys enjoy it 😩😩

there's a phobia called agoraphobia. it’s basically the fear of places and situations that can cause panic, helplessness and/or embarrassment. usually, i can deal with it. but things like cringe worthy scenes and overly cheesy romance is unavoidable.

especially being friends with jeon jungkook.

i knew better than to hand out my phone number to just anyone, but i thought maybe jungkook would be so busy with his own life, he would leave me alone.

for his parents' sake, i hope he had unlimited talk and text for his plan. the boy texted me first thing in the morning and every hour or so. he would call me at night, sometimes even facetime me, just before he went to bed. and even when we would hang up, he would still text me goodnight.

the only other person i would talk to everyday, other than my parents, is hoseok. hoseok was my older cousin, but one of my closest friends as well. but even hoseok gave a break during the day to allow some “me time” for the both of us.

jungkook was relentless. he would always text me “good morning sunshine” and then text me “good night my moon”. what the hell even was that?

as much as it was annoying, it was endearing in a sense. i guess it was nice to have someone other than family constantly checking up on me. but some part of me couldn’t help but wonder if it was because of what namjoon had said and if he felt obligated to have to talk to me.

i knew jungkook wasn’t like that. but a small part of me couldn’t help but convince myself that it could be true.

“so the guy texts you all the time? it’s not a big deal,” hoseok said, sitting across the island in his kitchen. i stuck my fork into my bowl of fruit, impaling a small blueberry in the process.

“i mean, it’s not but it’s weird. hobi, i’ve never had someone crave to talk to me so often. and i swear it has to be because of what our counselor said,” i mumble.

the thing about hoseok is he has an aura that gets you to spill all emotions. much like jungkook. but the difference between the two of them in my life is that i’ve known hoseok a lot longer and can confirm he can keep his mouth shut.

“well contrary to your belief, you’re a decent person to have around,” he shrugs, giving a strawberry in his mouth. i snort at his comment and roll my eyes.

“wow, what a compliment. it’s a wonder you’re single,” i chuckle, shoveling the fork full of blueberries into my mouth.

“i’m single by choice. what about you?” hoseok smirks, wiggling his eyebrows at me.

“what’s that supposed to mean?” i asked, laughing at his expression.

“what?”

“the whole thing?” i respond, laying my fork down onto the counter, leaning onto it with my elbows, forearms flat as i folded my hands.

“i’m single because i choose to be. i prefer comforting solitude than forced company,” he shrugs, continuing to shovel fruit into his mouth.

“forced company?” i ask.

“yeah. like, just because we’re together, they feel obligated to HAVE to hang out with me or invite me everywhere when, in reality, i don’t give a damn. i mean, you know me. we both value our solitude and respect that. but it’s hard to find someone that understands that. and then i’m the bad guy for wanting alone time when really, it’s a mental health break,” hoseok explains, his eyes locked onto the bowl in front of him.

his statement surprised me. he was always such a people oriented person. as kids, he was the first to make friends between us and always such an extrovert. it kind of hurt to know eventually his whole personality switched. but maybe being so wrapped up in my world and in my own issues, i failed to acknowledge the people around me.

the atmosphere changed after that. almost as if there was a sad reminisce in the air.

“do you think you’re forced to keep me company?” i blurted. i couldn’t deny, the thought crossed my mind multiple times before. was everyone around me just babysitting to make sure i didn’t hurt myself?

i couldn’t tell. i knew asking would be dumb. hoseok would never tell me the truth. he’s usually a pretty blunt and up front guy, but he would never outright hurt my feelings. which saddened me even more. would he willingly lie to comfort me? knowing what i knew?

“do you think i am?”

“yeah,” i honestly admitted. we both sat in silence, taking in my answer.

it wasn’t a lie. like i said, the thought had crossed my mind. every time he placed his phone down on the table to force himself to give me his attention. the way he seemingly dropped everything immediately if i asked him to hang out with me or pick me up some place. how i never heard of him being with friends.

the more i sat there, the more i threw myself into overdrive, thinking until my head started to pound from overthinking.

“well, you’re wrong,” he sighed. my eyes flitted up to gaze at his face. he looked sullen, almost like my answer had upset him. i released a silent huff through my nose, smirking in the process.

“you don’t have to protect me,” i murmured quietly.

“my mom called me. she begged me to come home one day. i didn’t understand it at first, but she's my mom. i did as i was told. when i got home, she didn’t say anything, just told me to get in the car. i remember thinking to myself ‘what’s got her feeling this way? why is she being ominous with her actions?’ the whole drive, she said nothing,” hoseok said, a distant look in his eyes.

“she ended up pulling over at some park. it was late, so i didn’t recognize it at first. but then i realized what park it was. it was the park we went to as kids. and, again, i kept wondering to myself why she was being enigmatic with her actions. and then she spoke. she said six words and then didn’t speak the rest of the week,” he said, his voice shaken with sadness.

“what did she say?” i asked softly, my voice a mere whisper. hoseok looked up at me, his eyes glazed red.

“your cousin tried to kill herself.”

i felt like the air had come out of my lungs.

it’s funny, people like to talk about your attempts, but nobody ever tells you where they were and what they were doing when they heard the news. nobody tells you the pain they feel or the hurt. the anger or the betrayal. they pretend like what they felt didn’t happen to convince themselves it wasn’t real and they could move on. because it didn’t work and you’re alive.

but hearing hoseok tell me about his experience, it stirred something in my heart and i hadn’t felt in a long time.

regret.

“she didn’t even mention if you survived or if you were okay. that’s all she said. and because she was crying, i assumed the worst. i had assumed you died. and it felt like everything in me… stopped working. like, i forgot what it was like to not have you by my side. every… every memory, every laugh. every inside joke. it was like a corny ass film playing at 2x speed in front of me. my mind kept telling itself this can’t be real. she wouldn’t do that to me’. but the longer we sat there and the harder she cried, i couldn’t take it. i jumped out of the car and just started running. i didn’t know where i was going but i just had to run because the car was so suffocating, i thought i was gonna pass out. and i kept asking myself ‘why her? why couldn’t she just talk to me? why didn’t she tell me she was hurting? does she know how much i love her and that i would do anything to keep her here?’ and then i was pissed because i thought you had abandoned me. that you didn’t care about me or your parents or my mom. but then… once i stopped running… i felt bad for you. because i could never imagine the amount of loneliness you must’ve felt thinking the only way to solve this was to end it all,” he said through his compendious recount of that night. i could feel the hurt and regret make its rounds in my heart, forcing my body to follow. it physically ached to hear hobi recall every moment of that night. “i’m sorry,” i cried out, crying into my hands.

“that’s why i hang out with you. that’s why i talk to you. because i don’t want you to feel that kind of loneliness ever again,” he admitted, sniffling. the hurt and regret only further festered and made me cry over hard to the point where i felt like i couldn’t breathe. hoseok stood from his spot, making his way around the island. he stood in front of me, pulling me into his chest, my arms wrapping around his waist. i hadn’t hugged anyone in years, and the amount of care and love hoseok had emitted through his hug made me cry even more.

“and that’s why i’m so glad you have jungkook. because when i can’t be there, at least he is,” he explained, rubbing small circles in my back.

though my doubt was still heavy, and i felt as if he had an ulterior motive, hoseok’s words comforted me in a way.

jungkook had been nothing but kind, never intrusive or inquisitive about my history or my feelings. he spoke to me because he wanted me to know that he cared.

and for the first time in forever, i felt something else too.

hope.

[staycult]

highschool!jisung as your boyfriend

pairing — gender neutral reader x jisung

genre — fluff / bullet scenario / friends to lovers

word count — 1.6k

enjoy!

so

u and jisung had been friends for quite some time now

ever since highschool started probably

u guys were in the same friend group

you were always with him during lunch

and u guys go home together bcs ure practically neighbors

“[y/n]! smile!” he said as he pulled out his favored polaroid camera

as you were about to turn your head around you heard a loud click, coming from the camera

a flash of light blinded your eyes

so you tried to cover it

“hey! i wasnt ready!” you pouted, giving jisung a light slap in the arm

he stuck his tongue out to mock your reaction and pulled out the film from his camera

“you look ugly” jisung snorted, fanning the film

“shut up and start moving!” you rolled your eyes and grabbed his hand to make him walk faster

bcs guys were about to go home

“do you want to stop by at the park first?” jisung offered

ofc u cant resist him

his presence always make u feel at ease

“buy me ice cream then let’s go” you bargained, earning an eye roll from him

“Two ice cream cones please!” you requested, giving the money to the cashier. you tapped your finger on the cold surface while your other armed propped your chin. jisung on the other hand was shuffling through his notebook filled with polaroid pictures that he took with your friends.

“stop staring at my pictures, ji” you laughed while grabbing your cone from the man in front of you and giving the other cone to jisung. “keep staring and you’ll fall for me” you added as you licked your ice cream. he clicked his teeth, “ew, you wish”

both you and jisung walked around the park, still in your school uniforms. the park is the place where you and your friends hang around when you guys have time. the slide and the swing are your most favorite part.

you sat down in the swing and tapped the other seat to motion jisung to sit down as well. “look, the sun is setting!” you pointed as you finished your cone. you looked over to jisung who was his camera pointed at you for the nth time. but this time, you managed to strike a pose in front of his polaroid camera. his cheeks can be seen from behind, obviously smiling at the sight.

days went by

you and jisung had been hanging out in the park swing almost every day

just the both of you

watching the sunsets and taking pictures

you noticed that he only takes random pictures of you but when youre with friends, they need to ask first before jisung would take a picture

he claims that your face is funnier with stolen shots

ofc u believed him

he is your best friend after all

the school year is about to end

and your music and arts teacher is talking about your final project

which was to write a song or poem, draw a portrait or make a poster

with a special meaning behind it

you almost ripped your hair out of frustration when you tried to compose a song or draw

so u went for a simple poster

you and your friends were comparing your final outputs in the cafeteria

“come on, show us yours!” your friends encouraged you

“ahh, it’s really ugly im not even good at these kinds of shit!” you cursed, showing it to them anyway

“seriously? it’s good! youre like jisung. god, both of you say you did bad but it’s not!” you friend said while eyeing your poster

“really? jisung i want to see yours!” you said while grabbing some of your friend’s food

“no” he said, sticking a tongue out to mock you

“why not?” you replied while pouting

both of you bickered for atleast 3 minutes

saying lots of ‘no’s’ and ‘why not’s’

he had enough of your shit

and pulled you out of the cafeteria

holding his notebook, backpack and a ukelele

jisung was grabbing you by your wrist until you arrived at the school’s rooftop. you didn't have the time to respond at his sudden action.

“ouch! what was that about?” you said once he lets go of your wrist. “you want me to show you my output right? well here it is. listen.”

you were taken aback by his words, did he really get annoyed by your previous bickering? and why are we on a roof top anyway????

jisung grabbed his ukelele and opened his notebook, which was filled with polaroid pictures of you that was taken over the school year and years before that.

“it’s called hello stranger,” he spoke and started strumming on his ukelele

“The moment I felt like our eyes met

my body moved all on its own

Movin’, movin’, movin’, movin’, movin’

The closer we get the more I think

about what it is I’m feeling

My mind is filled with question marks

I can’t see anyone

around us anymore, you’re just growing more clear

Everything on this road

is blurred and faded out except for you

I’m filled with nothing but curiosity about who you may be

It’s like I’m approaching you drawn by something I can’t even know

I won’t beat around the bush, my subconscious is pushing straight forward

having me walk as it pleases without a single thought

Ah, a new wind is blowing

Where could it have come from?

It’s strange, but it’s not cold

Before I know it my feet are moving, following the wind

I take my hands out of my pockets

Hello Stranger, I keep being drawn to you

Growing closer

to you without a single thought

I’m curious, more and more and more as time passes,

why am I like this? Who are you to do this to me?

Stranger

Nana nanana nana

Nana nanana nana

Closer

Hello Stranger, who are you to do this to me?

I can see in you the things that I myself am lacking

I try yelling out to you the things I had just yelled into empty space

The things I didn’t have, that I was missing before I met you,

all of these feelings, every moment

my mind is filled with exclamation points

I can’t see anyone

around us anymore, you’re just growing more clear

Everything on this road

is blurred and faded out except for you

Something’s different about you, but I’m not sure what

I think the light approaching me now must be you

Even if I look away I can still see your afterimage,

you never leave my sight, who are you to do this to me?

Ah, my feet are moving, following this new wind

I take my hands out of my pockets

Hello Stranger, I keep being drawn to you

Growing closer

to you without a single thought

I’m curious, more and more and more as time passes,

why am I like this? Who are you to do this to me?

i love you”

it’s been weeks since you and jisung last spoke and since his sudden confession

you were about to tell him how you felt, too

how he makes you happy these past few days

to the point where you were falling for him too

but he ignored you

was it because he felt awkward?

or scared?

confusion was taking over you

and you know damn well youre gonna have to take measures into your own hands

so you came up with a plan to atleast get him to talk to you

“come on! just say i wont be there” you begged your friend. “fine. so roof top it is?” you squealed and gave your friend a hug. plan was to make your friends invite jisung at the same place he confessed on only to see youre the only one there

you grabbed your backpack since you had a vacant class and went to the rooftop to prepare. you knew jisung had a vacant class too, so you were hopeful he’s going to drop by.

“hi, i like you too” you practiced “no, too awkward” you ran your hands through your hair in frustration. “hey jisung! will you vincent van gogh out with me?” you repeated with hand motions this time. “god no” you mentally slapped yourself because of the cringe

“jisung, i like yo-” you repeated. you felt someone hug you from behind, “you do?” his husky voice sent shivers down to your spine as he hugged you even tighter.

“i-i do” you admitted, removing his arms so you can face him properly. “i really really do, i cant stand you not talking to me.” you burried your head to the crook of his neck.

“im sorry, baby. i didnt know how to handle rejection yet” he let out a low laugh, earning a laugh from you too. he snaked his arms around you and swayed you back and forth. humming the tune of the song he composed.

“youre mine now, are you?” he spoke, kissing your forehead as you gave him a nod.

bf jisung would mean

A VERY PLAYFUL RELATIONSHIP

SERIOUSLY

the confession may be soft and cuddly

but after like 2 days

yall are like best friends again

but with a mixture of sweetness

things never really changed

but you were still glad

love letters and songs !!!!!

lots and lots of kisses

cheek, forehead, chin, shoulder kisses

you name it

he would gently cup your face while doing so

he likes teasing you

but u tease him back

ends up with him being all pouty

will help u out with homework

ice cream and park swing dates

would literally take polaroid pictures of both of you

the ones he took before yall got together is displayed in his room

on the back of his phone

and the rest, he keeps it in his notebook

which was filled with songs about you

will sing you to sleep

will hold your hand literally every where

“baby, im the luckiest to have you”

author's note —

just imagine it's the slow version of hello stranger ok ALSO i want jisung to be my bf like ??

[brelione]

Trying To Help (The Best Boys)

Series Masterlist

Warnings:Mentions of death, not super sad kind of just conflicting I think (figured id give you guys an emotional break), mentions of blood.Not proof read because im a lazy bitch.

“Hey pretty boy.”You whispered, trying not to cry.Topper frowned, not understanding where he was or why everything felt so weird. “Im sorry I drove off a bridge.”He replied, his voice sounding funny as if he had been talking with food in his mouth.

 “Dont be bubs, you didnt mean to….”You replied, hoping your voice wasnt hurting his head.His eyes closed again, too lazy to keep them open. “Rafe should be here soon.”You bit the inside of your cheek anxiously.

His nose scrunched up, a look of disapproval on his face. “Why does everything always gotta be about Rafe?”He asked, his eyes opening wide when he realised there was a cast on his arm.He moved the fingers on his right hand, making sure that one wasnt broken too.Needles and IVs had been stabbed into his arm and hand, an air tube across his face and at his nostrils.

He noticed your hand on the bed, reaching for it with his good hand.You let him hold it, glad he wasnt mad at you.The room was quiet and dark but not so much that it was awkward, the two of you just trying to keep eachother calm. “Hey,guys.”The door opened to reveal Rafe.

He was wearing a backwards hat, a light blue polo shirt and black pants.He looked just as much of a mess as you, a guilty expression on his face.His eyes flicked over to you and Toppers hands as he sat in the chair next to you.

 “Is that Rafe?”Topper asked, too tired to open his eyes again. “Yeah, dude.You really fucked up this time.”Rafe smiled but his face quickly fell into a frown when you didnt do the same.You began to drag your fingertips along Toppers arm, feeling a bit better when he grinned at the feeling.

“So how was the movie?”He asked, feeling his eyes water up. “Um...yeah, we didnt end up finishing it.Guess it wasnt the same without you there.”You muttered, your fingers trailing back down to his palm.

He hummed, taking in a deep breath when he realised you could hear his heartbeat increasing from the monitor. “I knew you wouldnt finish it.Between you and Kelce screaming and….and Rafe being an impatient slut.”Topper smiled, opening his eyes ever so slightly to catch a glimpse of Rafe’s reaction.

 “Hmm...you’re lucky your arms already broken, pussy.”Rafe smiled, becoming less tense when you rolled your eyes. “DOnt be fucking rude.”You whispered with a small smile. “You know what...its the quoting the Kardashians daily for me.”Topper bit his lip as he waited for you to respond. “Its...the breaking my flower pot for me.”You replied, tapping your fingers against his palm.You grinned,recalling the memory.

You and Kelce had spent the morning together after a sleepover.You had scrolled through your pinterest feed as usual, coming across a ton of diy plant pots and decided to just go for it.You told Kelce about your idea as you two sat down for breakfast, both of you half asleep as you drank coffee. “Yeah, okay.”he agreed, putting on his shoes once he had finished his eggs.

 “So how many pots should we get?”He asked as you buckled your seatbelt.You shrugged, not really having a proper answer as he began to drive to Walmart, cursing when he couldnt find a parking spot.Once he did he waited for you to go back to your pinterest boards and figure out exactly what type of paint you would need for the project.

It was far too early for the store to be busy, holding on to Kelce’s back as he grabbed a cart. “What isle?”He asked, stopping to grab a bag of cheetos. “Uhhh….I dont know.Hold on.”You pulled out your phone, holding onto him with one arm and resting the phone on top of his head.

 “Thirteen.”You replied, squealing and holding on for dear life as he began running through the store, coming to a halt when he reached the isle.You hopped off of his back, grabbing some small pots and some medium pots and putting them into the cart carefully. 

“Can I paint spongebob on mine?”He asked, his eyes glancing through the paint colors on the hunt for a bright yellow. “I dont care, paint whatever you want.”You replied, grabbing the primary colors and tossing them into the cart.Kelce being Kelce had freaked when he saw the variety of stickers, buying at least thirty dollars worth of puppy stickers, marvel stickers, car stickers and shiny spikes. 

“No weeds are gonna mess with this plant when im done with it.”He said proudly as he grabbed every single strip of spike stickers.You had rolled your eyes, picking out some pearl like stickers and tossing them in the cart.Kelce smiled, getting an idea.

He moved all of the items to the opposite side of the cart to leave an empty space, picking you up quickly and putting you inside. “Kelce-seriously?”You sighed, holding on to the side as he pushed the cart quickly, swerving it against the tile on his way to the plant isle. 

“Yep, its easier this way.”He replied, stopping the cart once you guys got to the other side of the store. “Ooh….can we grow sunflowers?”He asked, tossing the bag of seeds into the cart before you could answer. “Get lavender too.”You replied, taking out your phone to play subway surfers.

Kelce huffed, arms wrapping around your shoulders and placing a kiss on the top of your head as he watched you play. “Whats your high score?”He asked, playing with the baby hairs that had fallen out of your braids. 

“I dunno, higher than yours.”You grinned, hearing him gasp. “Fucking rude.”He muttered, flicking your temple. “Fuck you.”You replied, avoiding a train. “Fuck you!”He exclaimed driving the cart to check out.He grabbed a few packs of gum as well, scanning the items at the self checkout.

You two then spent the whole afternoon painting pots and covering them in an obnoxious amount of stickers.The small one that Kelce had done all by himself was covered with spike stickers that kept falling off. “It wont stay stuck!”He exclaimed, becoming frustrated.

 “Kelce, babe, its cause you’ve got paint on the sticky part.”You sighed, grabbing a paper towel and putting it under the water to wipe off the yellow paint from the pot.He was a pouting mess for the rest of the afternoon but was happy with the outcome of the pot, taking a photo of it to post on his snapchat story. “How did you do that?”He asked, pointing to the pastel rainbow pot you had painted.You shrugged, just going off of what you saw in the video.You two had decided to just go sit on the couch and watch some cartoons while you waited for Rafe and Topper, leaving the pots to dry on the table.

Once Topper had gotten there he had given you a quick greeting and went into the kitchen to get something to drink, accidentally elbowing one of the pots in the process and sending it to the floor, the clay colliding with your tile floor. “TOPPER!WHAT THE FUCK?!”You exclaimed, rushing into the kitchen.

“Its the stealing my hoodies from me and then pretending you didnt for me.”He replied.Your heart dropped as you realized you were wearing his hoodie right now, beginning to freak out when you realised you werent even wearing pants.

 “Shut up.”You replied, squeezing his hand lightly.Kelce came through the door a few seconds later, sighing loudly. “These people are ridiculous-I had to convince them that I was Top’s adopted brother.Did you have to do that?”He asked Rafe, going to stand at the end of the bed.

 “Nope.”Rafe replied.Kelce bit the inside of his cheek, staring at Topper. “Concussion?”He asked, noticing the bandage that was peaking out from Topper’s forehead.You nodded, looking between the two boys. “How you feeling?”Kelce asked.Topper grinned, peaking one eye open. 

“Like shit.”Topper replied, a small smile on his face. “How long am I gonna be stuck here?”Topper asked, finally acknowledging the fact that he was in a hospital.Rafe shook his head, looking over to Kelce as if he knew anything about the situation that you and Rafe didnt.

Kelce shrugged, not knowing either. “I mean, with that kind of injury one could only assume a good two weeks or so.You wont be able to drive- (Y/N)- how did you get here?”Kelce asked, realising.You had texted them from the hospital which meant that Rafe hadnt driven you.

You went quiet, feeling their eyes on you. “Uhhh….I drove.”You replied, hoping they wouldnt push further.Topper opened both of his eyes this time, wanting to make sure he had understood properly. “What?”Topper asked, cringing at the lisp he now had.

He shouldve known his voice would sound different.He had literally bit off part of his tongue. “I drove.”You repeated, feeling a bit insecure.Rafe just looked confused, Kelce was shocked and Topper just couldnt believe it.

 “How’d it go?”Topper asked, wanting to sit up when he realised that he couldnt really move that much.You shrugged, trying to figure out why the attention was on you when Topper had literally almost died.

 “I dont really know, kinda just did it.I dont really remember it either.”You replied, feeling Rafe’s hand drift onto your knee, tapping your knee cap.He had been doing it for years.He was awkward most of the time and didnt know what to do if his hand was empty, usually going to hold yours or just touch you in some way to feel more grounded.

 “Why dont you remember it?”Topper asked, unable to grasp the whole situation.Thank god he didnt know that the nurse had told you about his ‘last words’.He wouldve had a heart attack on spot. “I was in shock, dum dum.I was just-just trying to make breakfast and then the fucking hospital calls me and tells me that you drove into a river.”You laughed, a few tears rolling down your face.

Toppers heart beat quickened,squeezing your hand tight. “I said I was sorry...did you at least drink water this morning?”He asked, wishing he could hug you.You laughed, wiping your face. “No, no I didnt cause I thought you were gonna die!”You replied, sniffling.

 “For the love of life, Topper.Keep up.”You let out a shaky breath. “Im trying my best, sunshine.”He answered, not paying attention to Rafe or Kelce.It felt like you were the only one who was actually in the room with him.

 “I mean, I guess its just karma.Have any of us ever left during a movie night?All im saying is I think its like a curse or something.”Topper answered, trying his best to get you to stop crying.Kelce couldnt even think of something to say, the situation was overpowering him.

You just sighed,leaning your forehead against the mattress, staring down at the floor. “Why’d you leave?”You asked, still not understanding the full situation that lead to Topper leaving your house.Rafe shifted in his seat, squeezing your knee, almost trying to tell you not to bring it up again.

 “Just...wanted to go home.”He mumbled, knowing better than to bring up the argument that he no longer cared about.He couldve laughed at it.As jealous as he was as Rafe even he could admit that the son of a bitch cared about you more than anyone and to accuse him of not caring about you was the stupidest thing he had ever said.And that was saying a lot.

SOmetimes he was close to positive that Rafe didnt care about him or Kelce but there was never a single doubt in his mind that Rafe didnt love you.Now he kind of wish that he had died since it would leave you with Rafe and Kelce.

They were both better friends than he could ever be no matter how hard he tried.It wouldve been better for the whole friend group if he had stayed dead. “You have a concussion, bubs.Nothing you say is relevant for the next two weeks.”You joked, feeling the tears roll down your face and onto your collarbones, not even bothering to wipe them away anymore.

 “You have a single brain cell, (Y/N).Nothing you say is relevant.”He replied, laughing a bit.It didnt do much but hurt his head and make his tongue sting. “See?That’s not relevant.”You replied, lifting your head up from the mattress and kissing the back of his hand lightly.

Rafe smiled slightly, glad to see that you were a bit better and that Topper hadnt yelled at him to get out. “You know what?I just think I should say something really important.”Topper announced, thinking that he sounded louder than he actually did.Rafe squeezed your knee tightly, worried that Topper would tell you what he knew and that Kelce would freak out about it.

 “I dont think im allowed to watch tv with a concussion-fuck.”Topper grumbled, hearing Rafe let out a sigh of relief.He noticed Kelce still standing, getting up and asking you quietly if you two could share your seat.

You huffed, standing up and allowing him to sit in your chair, sitting on his lap, feeling self conscious when Toppers hoodie lifted to reveal half your thigh. “I mean, you could always do other things to pass the time.”Kelce replied, sitting down in the chair.

 “Hmm...like what?”Topper asked.Thank god Kelce was an optimist, the rest of you would be absolutely fucked without him. “Like….coloring, reading or….I dont know, thinking.”Kelce suggested, going quiet soon after. “Read what?”Topper asked.

He had never liked reading.Back when you guys were still in school he would refuse to read anything, tossing his homework down as you and Kelce tried to do yours.You usually had to harass Rafe for hours to do his work when all he could focus on was you.He would purposely annoy you just so you’d talk more and get all mad.

Between him and Topper you never got your work done, having to read to Topper so he would get some of his work done. “I could read you the Harry Potter books, ive got them downloaded to my phone.”You replied, a small grin on your face.

Toppers face became red, wanting to protest but deciding that he’d rather have you read to him than continue with the upsetting conversations. “Yeah, okay.”He answered, closing his eyes as you began to read.Kelce was smiling as you read, making comments every once in a while. 

“Wow, what a bitch.”He muttered about Vernon.Rafe squeezed your waist, resting his head against your back.It was some time in the afternoon when the nurse came in to check Toppers IV and give him some more medication. “Theres food available in the cafeteria, a warm soup or something soft would be best for your friend here.”She gestured towards Topper before leaving.

She had given you all a weird look, trying to figure out why a patient’s girlfriend was sitting on the lap of his assumed brother.Kelce bit the inside of his cheek, hearing his stomach rumbling. “Alright, well im going to the cafeteria. (Y/N), can you come with me please?”He asked.

You sighed, shaking your head. “Im not wearing pants.”You answered. “Can you stand up for a minute?”Rafe asked.You huffed, getting off of his lap, eyes widening when he pulled off his shorts and handed them right over to you.

Kelce wasnt even surprised, just hungry.You awkwardly pulled up the shorts, tying them tight around your waist and following Kelce into the elevator.Everything was going smoothly until it came to a stop. “What the hell?”Kelce asked, hitting a ton of buttons at once. “Kelce!Stop that!”You smacked his wrist, screaming when the elevator moved slightly, coming to a stop again. 

“What should I do?Im pressing the red button!”He exclaimed as he pressed it again. “I dont know!Press it again!”You exclaimed, clinging onto his arm. “Oh my fuck-shit dammit!Now we’re gonna die!”You exclaimed. 

“We’re already in a hospital, we’ll be fine.”He answered, pressing the button again. “Kelce!It’s gonna fall!”You exclaimed, holding onto him so tight you were starting to shake. “No its not, its fine.Just wait for someone to come fix it.”He spoke, pulling you onto the floor so you were sitting against him. “It’ll be fine, just wait.”He repeated.

“Im sorry, man.”Topper sighed, looking over to Rafe.THe brunette simply shrugged, not really bothered by it anymore. “Apology accepted.”Rafe replied.Topper let out a sigh of relief, glad that the tension wasnt as strong.

 “But like, can you be honest real quick?”Topper asked, waiting for Rafe to answer. “Yeah, yeah okay.”Rafe replied, dreading what Topper would ask. “Did you guys do anything?”He asked.Rafe frowned, not knowing what to say.

He didnt want to tell Topper something that you werent okay with him knowing but at the same time didnt want to lie. “Yeah, yeah we did.”Rafe replied, holding his breath.Topper simply hummed, letting out a breath through his nose. 

“Were you careful?You know she doesnt….hasnt done those types of things.You didnt hurt her though, right?”Topper asked.Rafe was a bit confused, thinking that Topper would get all jealous and grumpy. “Yeah, yeah I was….she was fine, like she said she was fine and I told her she could….ya know, stop me.She didnt though, I was careful.”Rafe’s cheeks were red, trying not to go into too much depth.

Topper nodded a bit, sighing. “Thats good...so like, are you guys dating now or whatever?”Topper asked, trying to ignore the pit in his stomach.Rafe gulped, not really knowing the answer himself. “I dont know….its all complicated I guess.”He replied, feeling guilty now that he was actually talking about it.

 “Okay...hey, do you think she knows?”Topper asked, hoping you wouldnt walk in at the wrong time.Rafe laughed at the comment. “Damn, man.I dont even know.Like, she obviously knows I do.Ive made it pretty obvious but like...you’ve made it pretty obvious too at this point I think.I feel like she doesnt think anyone would like her like that no matter how obvious we make it.I dont know, I feel like right now wouldnt be a good time to talk to her about this though, lets just not say anything to her.”Rafe muttered, realising he had promised you that he wouldnt tell anyone what you two had done last night

. “Hmm...you know whats fucked?”Topper asked, blinking slowly.Rafe hummed, waiting for him to continue. “I lost my two year streak with her.And you.”The blonde smiled, wiggling his toes carefully.Rafe laughed, pinching his nostrils. “Yeah, thats fucked.”He agreed.

“Nobody’s coming.”You huffed, holding on to Kelce’s hand as you leaned against the elevator wall. “You dont know that.”He replied, not sounding genuine at all. “I dont know….do you wanna talk about something?”You asked, thinking of ways to pass time while you guys were trapped.

He sighed, nodding. “What do you wanna talk about?”He asked, flicking at your fingertips. “I dont know...how are your cousins?”You asked, realising that that’s where he had come from.He chuckled, shaking his head.

 “Alec would not stop complaining about sushi, I guess her favorite restaurant closed and now shes all pissy about it.Shes really fucking tall now.”He sighed, kind of glad that he was able to leave the house.You nodded, trying to think of something else to say.

Alec was his 17 year old cousin, she was nice sometimes but she could also be a lot to handle from what you had heard.She was pretty cool though, always commenting on your instagram posts and hyping you up.It kind of gave Rafe a little competition since she always commented before him.

 “What about Jax?Is he still an ass?”You asked.You had met Jax a total of two times, both times he had called you hot and stared at you.He was 17 so it was kind of weird of him but you hadnt had to deal with him in a good six months.

Kelce shrugged, not having much to say. “Yeah, I dont think hes ever gonna change.He tried to download porn to my phone.”Kelce replied, biting the inside of his cheek. “Hey, is it true that Rafe kissed you?I mean, he told me but I figured he probably just dreamt it.”fuck.

Now everything was coming unraveled and you’d have to figure out how you wouldnt hurt anyone. “Uh...yeah, he did.”You answered, biting your bottom lip.He was silent.That was scary if something was so shocking that Kelce had nothing to say.

 “Alright...so how do you feel about it?”He asked, keeping his voice calm and steady.He was tired of not knowing what was going on, not understanding the new tension between you and Rafe.There had always been something there but recently it seemed to get a lot more serious.

But then again he had noticed the way you held Topper, how you’d sigh whenever the blonde kissed your forehead or when he’d hug you.He didnt really want to say anything, figuring that when you wanted to date one of them you would.

Now he sounded exactly like Topper, you were pretty sure those were the exact words that he had said to you. “Um….yeah, I dont really know.I guess that like im not mad about it but I just...I dont know how to feel.”You answered, knowing that it sounded stupid.

Kelce nodded, understanding. “So do you like Rafe?LIke, you know.”He asked, pulling at the sleeve of the hoodie out of boredom.You shrugged, not knowing the answer. “(Y/N), come on now.I see the way you look at him...its a little bit of something.”He pushed.

You knew he was right but you’d rather die than admit it. “I dont know, Kelce.Its just weird, I guess.Like we’ve been friends for like...eight years and now all this shit is happening.”You answered.

He nodded, trying to think of the best advice to give you. “Alright, well life is too short for shit.If you like Rafe then I think you should go for it.All that matters is that you’re happy and if he makes you happy then you should be with him.”Kelce squeezed your hand, waiting for you to speak.

Of course Kelce would say that.That was the most Kelce thing you had ever heard him say. “Yeah, but I dont think I want to be with him.”You muttered, not knowing how to explain what you were feeling.Kelce was confused, trying his best not to show it.

 “Okay….but why?Do you like someone else at the same time?”He asked, trying to piece everything together.The elevator began to move again, scaring you both. “Shit.”You sighed, holding on to his arm as he helped you up. 

“We’ll talk about this later.”It sounded like more of a question.He had never been great at being assertive.A few staff members apologized, explaining that a patient had went roaming around and they had to stop the elevators to prevent them from leaving the hospital.

Kelce held onto your hand tight as you made your way to the cafeteria.None of the food looked particularly appetizing, eventually deciding on a small container of mac and cheese for yourself, a turkey sandwich for Rafe and finding a sealed bowl of potato soup for Topper.

Kelce had grabbed a few sodas and a gatorade for Topper, reuniting with you as you both went to the line, paying for the food.You two had decided on just taking the elevator again, figuring it would be difficult to walk up the stairs with so much to carry.

Luckily it didnt come to a stop this time, the two of you completing the trip successfully and walking back into the hospital room.Rafe and Topper were laughing about something, Rafe sitting in his boxers.It was quite funny.You all ate in a pretty much silence, having to help Topper elevate the upper half of his bed so he could eat properly. 

“I hate hospital food.”Rafe sighed, biting into his sandwich while keeping you balanced on his left thigh.He tried to ignore all of the thoughts he was getting, figuring that the lack of caffeine in his system was making him horny.

That first night in the hospital had been the hardest.You were the only one who was allowed to stay while Kelce and Rafe had to go home.You had given Rafe his sweatpants back.

He decided that he needed to talk to you, taking your hand and getting far away from the room where the trauma patients were seperated from the elderly. “How are you?”He asked.You kind of wanted to punch him.What the hell kind of question was that?

 “I just...im fine.”You forced yourself to grin, not wanting to be rude.He licked his lips, looking around. “Thats...not what I meant.”His face flushed a bit, his ears pink. “oh-oh....um, yeah im fine.”You repeated.He hummed, hands ending up in the pockets of your hoodie.

 “Thats good....im sorry that I went so fast, I know you wanted me to be gentle.”He apologized, kissing your forehead. “Its fine, Rafe.”You answered, hugging him.He huffed, accepting the hug. 

“I’ll see you tomorrow, I can stop by your house and grab you some clothes.”He offered, staring down at you.You nodded, accepting the offer.He leaned down, kissing you gently, feeling himself get weak.

You pulled away after a moment, kissing the tip of his nose before standing on your tiptoes to kiss his forehead. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”You grinned, kissing him gently. “Alright, text me the clothes that you want...do you want one of my shirts?”he asked, smiling when you nodded. “Alright....okay, tomorrow.”He repeated, finally letting go of you.

You ended up staying up for a majority of the night, holding Topper’s hand as you read to him, switching from Harry Potter to short stories.He had moved over in his bed ever so slightly, groaning in pain, staring at the small empty space he had made.

You took the message, hesitantly laying next to him, becoming stiff when he wrapped his good arm around you and let you rest your head on his shoulder. “You’re cold.”He mumbled, holding you tighter.

The nurse came in to wake him up every hour and a half since sleep was bad for concussions.You barely got any sleep, more focused on listening to make sure his heartbeat was steady.

Rafe and Kelce came at seven in the morning with coffee and donuts, a container of chocolate flavored yogurt for Topper.Rafe had stuffed one of your backpacks full of clothes, grabbing whatever he thought would bring you comfort.

He had grabbed you a new shirt from his closet, a mint blue and purple striped polo that was pretty long on him which meant it would fit you like a baggy dress, spraying it with his cologne.

He grabbed your facewash for you, a hairbrush, some hair ties, some socks, soft pants and some loose fitting shirts.He felt a little guilty for looking through your bras and underwear but he knew he couldnt just not bring you some, grabbing a few random ones and stuffing them in the bag.

He grabbed your polaroid camera and a few of your photos, thinking that you might show them to Topper.You were glad to be able to change into some pants, thanking him quietly and slipping in the bathroom to change, sighing when you noticed how wattery and irritated your eyes looked, changing into the shirt that you had seen Rafe wear a couple of times, sniffing it and feeling a calm sensation run through your body.

You sat at the foot of the bed, pulling your knees to your chest as you drank your coffee, taking long, slow blinks.That had been your first day without sleep.It wasnt until the third day that Kelce and Rafe were becoming really concerned.

It had began to rain outside, Kelce and Rafe were trying to convince you to leave and go home. “No.”You answered, sitting in one of the chairs.Topper was asleep.“No-no, you.We’re going home- dont give me that look.You can come back tomorrow but tonight you’re going to sleep in your bed, okay?”Kelce asked, not really giving you any options, picking up your bag.

 “No.”You repeated, wanting to scream when he grabbed your arm, bringing you outside the room. “(Y/N), you havent slept in days.Just come home.”Rafe tried to convince you, going on to explain that you could ride with him or Kelce and then tomorrow the three of you would go into Rafe’s truck and Kelce could drive your car back to your house so you didnt have to worry about it.

You agreed eventually, going back into the room to say bye to Topper, kissing his cheek. “Hey, dont worry about me.Got it?If I find out you were worrying about me im gonna break all your flower pots.”He threatened, a small grin on his face.

You had decided to drive with Kelce, holding his hand as he drove on the wet roads.He was careful to drive slowly so he wouldnt freak you out, informing you that Rafe was going to go stop at a Papa Ginos to grab you guys dinner.

Your house felt foreign to you, the couch not comfy anymore.Kelce frowned, noticing your discomfort. The anxiety felt like it was eating away at your brain.Kelce tried to think of a way to help, the thoughts not coming so easy to him anymore.

The stress was building up inside of him, the stress from dealing with everyone elses problems combining with his own. “Come on.”He grabbed your hand, bringing you upstairs.

Your legs were tired from being held to your chest or bent at uncomfortable angles so you could lay in the hospital bed.He opened the door to your bedroom. “Lay down.”He told you, hoping his voice hadnt come across as creepy.

You raised your eyebrows, not understanding why he was telling you to do this but going along with it anyways.He got onto the bed next to you, wrapping an arm around your toso, one of his legs resting across your thighs with his head directly under your chin.

 “What are you doing?”You asked.You couldnt deny it, it was quite a comfortable position. “Im trying to help.I saw this thing on Tik Tok the other day that if you lay on someone its like a weighted blanket and helps with stress.”He explained, pulling your comforter up over your bodies.

It only took you a matter of seconds to fall asleep, Kelce grinning.The feeling of cuddling someone helped him too, a small sigh escaping his lips as he closed his eyes as well, falling asleep before Rafe pulled into your driveway with a pizza in the backseat.

@sweetlittlegingy    @nicolefarley603 @ilikealotofpeople-younotsomuch @newsies-yeet @butgilinsky @jjjmaybank @gracelovesbroadway  @one-stella @outerbongs  @copper-boom  @httpstarkey @teenwaywardasgardian @drewswannabegirl  @simonsbluee   @jiaraendgame  @khiaraaa-in-spacee  @on-socks-off @spn-marvel-nerd @lovelyelinor @chinamolina602  @sexytholland @28cnn  @popcrone818 @fttayla @cherryobx @n1ghtsh4d3-67 @drewstarkeyobx @wldflwrskyee @judayyyw @jjtheangel @jj-iz-bae@sunwardsss @meaganjm  @sarcasticsagittarius1998 @natalie-kate-98 @nxsmss @broken-jj @joshy-obx @classygirlything @abbiesthings @kindahavefeelingskindaheartless @teenagekook​  @multifandombabies @i-love-scott-mccall​

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[allhallowsreid]

just lots and lots of very long-winded, random thoughts about last night’s finale and the show itself...

so obvs no one has to agree with me on any of this, i just feel like there likely ARE ppl who feel like this and it’s easy to get shut down on tumblr for having different opinions, and i mostly just need to gather my feelings and thoughts in one place.

-ive seen a handful of ppl upset that the last ep centered around reid, but if you were to take 10 fans of this show, it’s a pretty good chance that 8 or 9 of them would say reid is their fave character. that isn’t me trying to insult any of the other characters, that’s just the way it is. whether it’s bc of his looks (and my lord was he gorgeous in this finale ep), or that he’s your typical cute white boi, or more organic reasons like he’s been there since day 1 and we were able to watch him change and grow, and he’s the opposite of the typical male characters we often see, especially on cop shows.. whatever the reason, he is a VERY popular tv character. and if it weren’t for that character, for better or worse, this show would have ended a long time ago.

-the ending itself.. i just feel like i don’t know what ppl were expecting?? this is not a show like supernatural or dexter or a show that has had a fluent overarching story to tell from start to finish. the story continues without us watching it. it’s another day at the office for them. was it a great ending? no, but it was fine. we see where all of them are headed. endings are so difficult, i’m just glad they didn’t kill anyone off or some garbage like that.

-so damn happy they hooked up luke and garcia. i have had such issues with garcia’s character since morgan left, i feel like she became a caricature, where she just overacts and i recently read an article with kirsten where she actually admitted that when shemar left she really didn’t know what to do with her character anymore. honestly? it showed. the obnoxiousness to luke was cute at first bc she obviously had a crush on him, but then it just became mean and out of character. this season i was happy to see her get a little bit more back to herself. all this being said, they were very clearly headed towards getting luke and garcia together this season with the overt flirting and one on one convo’s, i’m so glad they went through with it instead of leaving it open ended. and i will admit that of all the characters, i didn’t think garcia would be the one to leave, but it made sense. garcia is tough as hell, much tougher than she gives herself credit for, but like luke said, she can do this other job without the gore that she cringes over in literally every single episode of the show. also loved jj saying garcia was the glue of the team. so true, so well said. and side note, kirsten does a hell of a job writing these characters that she knows all too well, the other writers should’ve just let her take over in later seasons.

-prentiss... i love my emily so dang much, but man they give her the absolute worst dialogue. she gets stuck with all these long sentences that just.. they just don’t flow?? and it takes me out of the show so often. this has been since s12 when she became unit chief. there has been a handful of times since she became the boss that we have had flashes of old school smartass goth girl emily, and i cherished each moment, but it wasn’t enough. somewhere along the way they forgot how to write into the show that their characters had PERSONALITY. just as an example of the stupid dialogue she gets.. the end of the ep where it’s intended to look like rossi’s retirement party. then, idk who it was, emilys boyfriend maybe(?) says some dumb comment about oh gee i thought this was dave’s retirement! and then emily starts some awkwardly long line that could’ve been summed up in “dave decided not to retire afterall” and it was just soooo... weird?!!? if we are agreeing that A MONTH has gone by.. you are to tell me that it never once came up that dave said he was gonna retire and then changed his mind!??! that night, one month later, is the first that this discussion occurred!!?!?! and all of these dumb lines come out sounding so robotic, and i can’t blame paget, bc the lines are boring as hell. also unless i missed something i can’t rule emily out of being the next director, especially since their profile ended up being correct, lynch and the mom didn’t kill themselves, so i’m sure when that all came out, the next hurdle emily would have to clear is how they just blew up their very expensive jet right after having a budget meeting 2 episodes ago!!

- i’m gonna lump the newer characters together.. and just say that it was all too little, too late. they tried to give matt and luke more this season, and the ep’s centered on them were great, but it all felt forced to me. all this character development should’ve started as soon as they came onto the show. the relationships between the new and original characters also feels forced a lot of times, barring relationships like rossi and his boys, luke and garcia, tara and emily.. i mean that’s kind of all, right? we never saw much off-the-job, personal interactions between them and the rest of the characters, did we? and the way tara was treated on this show is inexcusable. aisha’s talents were so underused on this show it was criminal (pun intended). and actually, the above stuff i said about emily getting nonsense dialogue, you can throw matt in there too. his dialogue was friggin god awful at times on this show. in the words of early seasons reid, maybe try to be more conversational, writers!!

-man oh man was jj a badass and a half in this finale. tbh i always enjoyed liaison jj more than ssa jj, but when badass jj comes out i get all excited. i do feel like she would be the best fit to take over if emily left, she’d stepped into that role before and excelled. but she is another character that at times i think the writers just forgot how to write her personality somewhere along the way. i understand that the reality is that people change over time, but there were times that she was written like a typical high school mean girl, and that was just an insult to the character they created. the whole jeid thing was severely overblown and unnecessary. i don’t hate the idea of them being together, but why wait til s14-15 to deal with this? in the end i thought it was handled okay, i personally didn’t feel like it ruined their friendship or stayed awkward, which i appreciated, it was just a storyline that wasn’t needed and wasted time. also, ppl griping about “oh but she clearly loves will, if she loves spencer then she can’t love will!” i mean, actually, ppl are capable of loving more than one person at a time, hate to burst that bubble for ya.

-this seems like a good moment though to pause and just get this out about will lamon-fuckin-tagne jr... this guy is too good for jj lol, i am sorry but he is such a great guy. and can we review some things about will and his wife’s bestest friend, godfather to his children, spencer reid?? when will and spencer first met, it was during an unbelievably personal case to will, i mean his father died sending him a message about this case that the fbi was called in on. and his first intro with reid?? let’s see, reid spent that ep strung out on drugs, and full on abandoning the case to go hang out with his friend at a club/bar/lounge/whatever. ok, so that’s will’s first impression of jj’s bestie, and will STILL okay’d him being the godfather of his kids. not to mention, can you imagine your wife has been gone in the damn middle east for who even knows how long, then when she finally gets back and you think you’re gonna have her to yourself, but oh no, here comes jj’s friggin bestie again to come cry on the couch every night for several weeks!!!! and he gives zero indication of not liking spencer, in fact he seems rather fond of him. will is the most patient man ever, i swear.

-ok that was an unexpected side track. moving onto rossi. not sure why they were all like oh pfft this guy will never retire. the dude literally retired before the show started lol. if he retired once, when he was fairly young, why is the idea of it happening again so impossible? again, dumb dialogue. i loved the stuff with him and young gideon (i may be biased tho bc i’m just so damn proud of ben savage), i loved that rossi knew more about the jet than the others, however that was an inconsistency bc when rossi came back from retirement, he couldn’t believe the bau had its own jet. unless i just misunderstood what emily meant when she said it all started with rossi and gideon. i felt like lynch was a very underwhelming villain. super forgettable. there was no charisma like foyet or cat adams, there was no creep factor like mr scratch, there was no mystery like the replicator or the fisher king. his whole story just fell flat, and if there were anything interesting about him whatsoever, it’s bc of what rossi brought to the table, not the “chameleon”.

-my boy reid. he has several lifetimes of baggage to unpack, and i think of all the characters on this show, no one hates unpacking their trauma more than reid. i feel like it was so relatable that he could barely speak in this ep without sounding on the verge of tears, like every sentence was painful to even get out bc of how much hurt is stored up inside him. his trauma has defined him for years now, and if they had ended the show without addressing even some of it, the show would’ve been incomplete. i understand that actors schedules just don’t work out sometimes, but idk what the point was of having strauss and foyet be his devil and angel. and foyet’s long explanation of how bc he changed hotch, he changed the team was so convoluted that he may as well have just said “they couldn’t get james van der beek or the dude who played mr scratch, so im here instead”. i liked what they did with reid and maeve, and i actually don’t mind that there was no mention of max. they’re still very early in their relationship, and i feel like him coming out with some “wait i think i love max!” revelation would just be too fast and ooc. we already know that the relationship between them is growing, it doesn’t need to be said. and can i get an amen that maeve and reid didn’t kiss bc god that would’ve been weird as hell.

- i hate that we couldn’t have hotch or morgan or blake or elle or any of the main characters that helped make this show what it was, but i’m still grateful for the crumbs they gave us if the actors just couldn’t be booked for whatever reason. i’ve seen many shows at their end just try to pretend their previous characters never existed, so that we got some flashbacks with them was appreciated.

- RIP bau jet. i wiiiill reMEMber youuuuuuu.

-the song choice of david bowie’s Heroes was perfection. strangely, when i was driving home from work yesterday that song came on my playlist and i blasted it on repeat and performed a car concert for my fellow drivers on the road, and thought to myself that this song would be great for cm to end on. never thought they would actually do it since they had previously used the song in penelope’s ep. but what a great scene of all them dancing and singing and laughing like the bunch of nerdy idiots they are.

-i came late into the game with this show. ppl have been telling me for years to watch it and i only picked up watching in s13, after i read a spn/cm crossover fic and became super curious about who all these awesome characters were. with that said, i’m aware that since i haven’t invested years of my life in this show, that my feelings and thoughts about the ending will be different than those who have been hooked on this show for over a decade. i’m still just so thankful for the family portrayed by this show, and these characters i fell in love with, and episodes i’ll never forget.

[colonel-insomniac]

I’ve Got a Crush on You

read on ao3

Bobby was at a family reunion and he was so bored. This time, the reunion was at his grandmother’s house, and it isn’t that Bobby was without WiFi, it was merely that he had no one to really talk to. He could talk to his relatives, but they all talk to him like he doesn’t even have a brain just because he decided he’d rather continue working as a fry cook in a “grease generator” as they like to call the Krustie Krabbe. 

But he loved being there, at the Krustie Krabbe it was like he was finally who he was meant to be. Well, mostly. Maybe when Mr Krabbes sees him as the adult—albeit young adult—that he is, maybe he’ll finally get the recognition that he deserves. His friends were the only ones who talked to him like he was an equal, even Sandy, even though he couldn’t understand half of her science jargon. 

And he craved one of those weird conversations with his best friend. But though his parents considered Patrick Starr family, Bobby’s family was insistent that only real Porous family members were allowed to join. So, he’d said his farewell to Patrick, who still wanted to get in the car with Bobby, and drove the hour and forty-five minute journey to his grandmother’s house.

He could faintly hear the soft jazz music drifting from the living room. He was alone at the moment, sitting on a bar stool in the kitchen, tapping his fingers on the kitchen as he laid on his other arm. Patrick said he had to go run some errands an hour ago, and Bobby’s been waiting for Pat to get back. 

Bobby had already scrolled through his Instagram feed, his Snapchat, his Tumblr, heck, even his Twitter, which he barely ever uses. So now he's just kind of doing nothing, watching the black phone screen, willing Patrick to finally come back. 

But Bobby's been thinking in the time that he's had to do nothing. He's liked Patrick for a while now, and since there's nothing to entertain himself, he'll have to get creative. 

He's gonna song-lyric-prank Pat. Which is so 2018 in his opinion but maybe it'll be fun. He's gonna use something that Patrick should recognize, a Frank Sinatra song, specifically, I've Got A Crush on You.  

Now sitting up, Bobby grabs his phone and taps on Pat's message thread. 

<Sunshine ☀️: How glad the many millions of Annabelle's and Lillian's would be to capture me, Pat.>

Patrick takes a couple minutes to respond, and Bobby can almost see Pat try to understand what's going on, if the little "read" text underneath Bobby's message is anything to go on. 

Then the three dots pop up— 

<PraisePink: uh im confused, grls r going after u???>

Bobby smiles, tapping out the next chunk of lyrics. 

<Sunshine ☀️: but you had such persistence, you wore down my resistance…>

Bobby knows he has Pat's attention now, if the immediate typing is proof. Bobby decides now he isn't so bored anymore. 

<PraisePink: im still not gettin it bud>

<Sunshine ☀️: I fell, and it was swell…>

He knows that that message makes it sound as though maybe Bobby's hit his head a little too hard. Bobby glances around the room, just to check that no one's watching as he smiles at his phone. 

<PraisePink: r u ok>

<PraisePink: u rn't concussed?>

Bobby sends a quick 'nope' before moving along with the next lyric. This time, Bobby can't help blushing even though it isn't anything bad. 

<Sunshine ☀️: I'm your big and brave and handsome Romeo, and how I won you over I shall never, never know>

And yeah, so Bobby's adding a couple words into the lyrics, but it's only 'cause he wants it to last long enough for it to be fun. 

As the three dots appear again, Bobby leans in unintentionally, waiting excitedly to see what Pat's response will be. When he's sure Pat's almost done typing, his phone is suddenly gone, snatched out of his hands. 

Bobby looks up, bewildered. Then he spots his cousin Jack, or as they sometimes call him, Cousin BlackJack, an allusion to the numerous black eyes Jack has had through his adolescent years. Jack and Bobby are pretty similar in height, but whereas Jack is buff and muscular, Bobby isn't. 

"Jack," Bobby pleads, "give me back my phone. That isn't funny." He reaches for the device but Jack pulls it behind his back. 

"Uh-uh," Jack smirks, "let's see what you're up to that's keeping you from spending actual time with the family." Bobby blanches. "Jack, no. That's not fair. You know family is everything, I'm just talking to Patrick."

"Well, let's take a look, then." Bobby knows nothing he says will stop Jack, so he shuts his mouth and prays Jack won't tray and make an issue out of the situation. 

The evil glint in his cousins eye grew as he scrolled through the messages. "Oh this is pure gold." Jack chuckles, glancing at Bobby. "I wonder what'll happen if the family finds out." 

"No Jack, stop. I'm not messing around with you. Don't do this." 

Jack shrugs. "Nothin' I can do, cuz'." Jack glances at the phone again. "Jeez, this guy must be smitten with you Bobby, he's blowin' up your phone now." 

Bobby blushes and inwardly curses himself with words he'd never say out loud. This darned joke and his stupid boredom. He should've just waited until after the reunion to do this. 

"Tell you what, Robert," Jack smirks at Bobby, "tell me the next line, I wanna see what happens." 

Bobby sighs, tapping the counter. He knows he has to go along with this, maybe Jack will get bored and give up. 

"It's 'it's not that you're attractive, but oh, my heart grew active, when you came into view." Jack laughs, a mean one note 'ha'. "This is absolutely priceless, Bobby." Bobby’s eyes stung with tears, and he slid off his chair, garnering the attention of his cousin, who sighed heavily. 

“Bobby, you never let me have fun with these things. I’m not even being mean! Our relatives are all wondering where you are and why you’re all alone. This is just payback for me sticking my neck out for you.” Bobby thinks somehow this doesn’t make sense, Jack makes sure never to jeopardize himself, opting to throw others under the bus. Somehow, Bobby knows what he’s saying isn’t true.

But Bobby also knows himself, and he knows there’s a small chance that Jack isn’t lying, so he walks over to Jack’s side so he can at least see what’s going on. 

<PraisePink: sponge, ur kinda small, not big ;p>

<Sunshine ☀️: It’s not that you’re attractive, but oh my heart grew active, when you came into view>

<PraisePink: ok that 1st part kinda hurt :,C >

<PraisePink: whats going on tho>

Bobby bit back a grin at his friends statements, trying to put on his best poker face. “Bobby this guy’s smitten with you.” Jack exclaims incredulously. 

“No he isn’t, Jack, there isn’t even anything to suggest that. You’re just going crazy.” Bobby stammers his response, a little nervous that Jack could be right.

“Kid, are you insane? This Patrick guy is literally flirting with you, and come on he’s concerned about you falling and hitting your head??” Jack does the sticking-finger-in-mouth bit to suggest his disgust at the two, and Bobby smiles. 

“Well, Jack, you could always give me back my phone.” Bobby suggest, and rolls his eyes when Jack shakes his head. “Nope, I’m gonna help you.”

“Jack,” Bobby begins, “your ‘helping’ isn’t always so helpful, you know?” 

“I know.” In that instant, Bobby swears Jack looks like a villain, all dark shadows cast on his face from he doesn’t even know where, and an evil grin plastered on his face. 

Bobby knows he isn’t a bad cousin to Jack, so he doesn’t understand why Jack always has to pick on him, and Bobby knows that one of these days, he’s going to finally snap and finally get everyone to stop walking all over him. “C’mon, give me the next line.”

Bobby cringes “I’ve got a crush on you, sweetie pie, all the day and night-time hear me sigh.” He looks away in embarrassment when Jack laughs, “You chose the best song for this Bobby. Genius.” 

“Wow, he’s really waiting for you to respond, as soon as it sent it showed that he’d seen it. He’s already typing a response.” Bobby lifts up his head at that, intirgued as to what Patrick’ll say. 

<PraisePink: w8, what?>

<PraisePink: srsly????? u’ve got a crush on me???> 

Bobby never expected he’d let out a sound as strangled as the one currently exiting his mouth, a mix of a groan and a scream. Perhaps a little dramatic, Bobby would drape himself on a couch if he could do so, or if he were back home, he would pack his stuff and skip town for a couple days. But now he’s stuck with facing the consequences. “And now, Bobby,” Jack pulls Bobby’s phone behind his back, raising the pointer finger on his free hand, “I must bid you adieu.” 

Caught off guard, Bobby puzzles over what jack might mean by that when Jack takes off running. Ever alert, Bobby chases after him a second after. 

He’s too late. In the time it took for Bobby to chase after his cousin, Jack has managed to reach the bathroom and lock it behind him. Nevertheless, Bobby thrusts his shoulder against the door, hoping the old door will just give in. No luck. Of course, what else should Bobby expect?

It’s almost as though his world is shattering around him, because he knows whatever is happening between Jack and Patrick behind that door isn’t good at all. Right as he’s about to go run looking for a Bobby pin to pick the lock, the door swings open and Jack walks out. “Give it, Jack. Now I have to fix whatever mess you’ve stirred up. Again.” 

“Sure thing,” Jack replies and places the phone in Bobby’s open palm, much to his surprise. Jack just keeps walking, covering his mouth as he yawns. ‘At least his parents taught him that.’ Bobby thinks, spiteful as he aims the coldest glare he can manage at the back of Jack’s head. 

Now it’s time to lock himself in the bathroom and fix the damage. His message thread with Patrick has grown a lot despite Jack not being in the bathroom long. 

<PraisePink: sponge?? U still there???? r u being srs rn???> 

Then, a reply from “Bobby.”

<Sunshine ☀️: still here. Nah it was just a joke. I don’t like you.> 

Bobby face palms. That’s doesn’t even look like his text-speak. 

<PraisePink: u don’t like me like that?>

<Sunshine ☀️: I don’t like you at all Patrick.> 

Bobby can physically feel his stomach dropping. This is it, isn’t it? This is when his whole life simply ends. 

<PraisePink: oh this is a joke? Cos ur at a reunion, right>

<Sunshine ☀️: No I’m serious. You don’t deserve to be my friend.>

<Sunshine ☀️: and I know you like me, I have you pretty much wrapped around my finger. It’s pathetic, really> 

<PraisePink: and that’s what you really think, huh?>

<Sunshine ☀️: Yeah, i don’t need you>

<PraisePink: well I don’t need you>

Bobby falls to the ground, and surprisingly, with no loud thuds. <Sunshine ☀️: Pat?>

Two minutes pass. No response. Four. No response. Bobby waits ten minutes, hopelessly, as he waits for a response. Nothing. 

<Sunshine ☀️: Pat?>

<Sunshine ☀️: Look, you don’t have to answer, but please just read these.>

<Sunshine ☀️: You remember my cousin Jack? BlackJack?>

The little ‘read’ text pops up, so Bobby waits for an answer. Nothing happens, so he continues, desperately trying to get Pat to understand what’s happening. 

<Sunshine ☀️: I was in the kitchen doing the song lyric prank, that was me. But Jack took my phone out of my hands. I wasn’t paying attention around me because i was trying to mess around with you.>

Still no response. 

<Sunshine ☀️: I swear, i didn’t think he was going to say those things. He just said he just wanted to participate.>

<Sunshine ☀️: I don’t know why I didn’t think he was lying, Jack never changes. And then he ran to the bathroom and locked himself in and I couldn’t do anything but wait>

The three gray dots pop on his screen, and it doesn’t take Patrick long to type out his response, mostly because it’s short. 

<PraisePink: idk if i believe that.>

Bobby’s heart cracks as his desperation grows. 

<Sunshine ☀️: pat you have to believe me. You mean so much to me, so much that I don’t even know how to put it in words.>

<PraisePink: idk, can u maybe give me time>

<PraisePink: i know things usually dont affect me, but im actually rlly hurt rn>

Bobby lets go of his phone, and it clatters on the floor, as he draws his knees to his chest and full on cries. Sobs—maybe that’s a better word for it. “Alright, Bobby ol’ boy, you gotta pull yourself together.” He wipes his eyes as he stands back up, a plan already forming in his head. 

“I gotta leave this place, I need to get to Pat.” He pushes the door open, hurrying down the hall. Bobby’s about to make it through the front door, too, the door opens, one foot on the porch, one step closer to Patrick.

“Robert Porous!” At the sound of his first and last name, Bobby turns, stopping abruptly enough that he almost falls forward. His mom is walking towards him, and lays a hand on her son’s arm. 

“Just where on Earth are you going?” She asks, “And why were you crying?” 

Bobby bites his lip as he looks at his mom, “I messed up, with Pat, and I need to go make things right. Please, let me go fix this.” His mom studies his briming eyes for a moment, the wind blowing wisps of hair across her face, and ruffling the sleeves of her baby blue dress. She glances inside the house quickly, as her hand slides down, setting Bobby free. 

She nods once, quickly, and steps back. “Alright. Go, go to him, but I didn’t see you leave, alright? I’ll try and keep them from saying anything.” The pair hug and Bobby’s mom steps inside again, quietly closing the door, maintaining eye contact with her son. 

He hops into his car, and drives off. He finally got his license, but because he’s failed it a couple of times, he isn’t technically supposed to drive without an experienced driver for another month. But that doesn’t matter, all that matters is that he gets to Pat.  

He drives back to his beach town in silence. There’s no need for music when his brain provides enough chatter to drown out everything else. He keeps his eyes trained on the road in front of him, occasionally glancing at the speedometer and side mirrors, just like he should. 

He makes a couple stops on the way home. The first is to the nearest Target. Bobby carefully parks, and pretty much literally runs into the store, propelling himself forward with a cart. He scans the flower display and contemplates which one Pat might like before the lightbulb in his mind goes off. He races towards the Valentines Day aisle. The event is still a week away, and hopefully they’ll have exactly what he needs. 

Bobby nearly dances when he finds what he’d been looking for: chocolate roses. The delicate chocolate was wrapped daintily in red and green tinfoil. Bobby doesn’t even bother looking at the price tags, he grabs 20 chocolate flowers, and goes in hunt for his next item: ribbon. Once he gets to the crafts aisle, Bobby only knows he wants it to be something lacy. He’d thought maybe red, but now that he’d seen it up close, the red on red is too muted. 

He needs something that isn’t simple, something that’ll stand out. Scanning the rolls of lace on the shelves, his eyes keep going back to a dainty white lace. He decides it’s probably his best option, and heads over to the checkout, anxious to get to Pat right as the sun’s sets. Bobby’s in such a hurry that he nearly forgets his bag, this time literally running back to his car, gently setting down the bag on the passenger seat, and pulling out of the parking spot. 

<PraisePink: hey, can we talk?>

The message comes through while Bobby’s on the highway, his tongue poking out of his mouth only slightly as he pushes away his nerves. He’s never driven on the interstate highway before, so naturally he’s terrified. He doesn’t even glance at his phone, he’s on a mission, and it’s the most important thing to him right now. 

When he pulls the car off the interstate, it’s too stop at a chinese restaurant. He knows Patrick Starr better than he knows himself, and he knows Pat probably is craving chinese right now. Bobby decides even though he isn’t hungry, and can’t even stomach the thought of eating, he’d probably be hungry later, and gets himself some too. 

He’s now five minutes away, and each minute spent in the car feels like another hour passing by. The sky is bathed with those glorius golden rays of sun. Once he manages to safely park in front of the apartment complex, he takes a moment to wrap the roses together with the white ribbon. He carefully secures his own takeout box with some ribbon too, and slides it in his bag. Sometimes, you have to find solutions that aren’t necessarily optimal. 

He quietly makes his way up the stairs, pausing to read and answer Patrick’s text:

<Sunshine ☀️: Sorry, got a little busy. Back now though.>

He reaches Pat’s front door right as Patrick starts typing, and places down the bag of chinese takeout, laying the bouqet of chocolate roses on top of them. Bobby rings the doorbell and crouches behind a fake tree, right as the door swings open, heart hammering. 

He can just barely make out Patrick’s features as his face contorts in confusion and he bends down to pick them up. “Shoot!” Bobby yelps, realizing he forgot to write a note. As soon as he realizes he said it out loud, he clamps his hands over his mouth, peeking around the plant to check whether Patrick heard it. 

His phones buzzes in his pocket, but he ignores it. He knows it was Pat, he just barely managed to glimpse Patrick’s thumb hit the phone in his hand. “Bobby?” Pat calls out. “I know you’re there, you’re the only guy I know dorky enough to do something like this. Unless it was Edward. Hey Edward?!” 

“Whatever it is, the answer is no.” The muffled response makes Pat laugh, and nearly makes Bobby giggle. 

Pat picks up the bouqet and the takeout and walks inside, glancing around one last time. His eyes briefly stop where Bobby’s hiding, but he closes the door. Bobby knows he’s waiting. After a minute, Bobby quietly gets up and starts heading back down the stairs dejectedly. He can feel his bottom lip tremble, and he bites down on it. He may very well have lost his best friend. He lets the tears stream freely. 

He makes it to the threshold outside the building, glancing back briefly before sitting inside his car and pulling out his phone. 

<PraisePink: i know im not the brightest but i just cant tell if ur telling the truth, maybe we need to just take some space>

He places his phone on the console between the front seat and the passenger seat, and places his head on the steering wheel. Bobby’s so wrapped in his thoughts, and emotions he doesn’t hear the door open, or close for that matter. “Sponge.” comes the quiet whisper. Bobby still doesn’t hear it, so Pat places a hand on Bobby’s hunched shoulder. 

Bobby jumps, and an ungodly nasally gasp emits itself from his throat. His face burns in embarrassment. “Bobby, listen to me.” Pat states. “I know you’re the one who left the food and the roses.” Bobby opens his mouth, about to tell Pat to just forget about it, when Patrick shakes his head. “Listen. I thought maybe you were being honest with me before, and maybe you were just trying to get me to believe you. But then you left those chocolate flowers and the takeout—which is scary, how’d you know I’d been wanting chinese?”

“Pat—”

“Anyways, my point is, in that moment, I realized you’d always been there for me, you do sweet things like this. It just wouldn’t make sense for you to be mean to me and then do something like that.” Pat grabs Bobby’s small hands in his, but Bobby doesn’t meet his eyes. 

His curly burnt orange casts shade over his eyes as he keeps his head downcast. “Pat, I need you to know that I’ve got—”

“I know. I figured it out after that last lyric that was sent to me. I had to go search the song to make sure, but I know music, and I knew that it was Frank Sinatra. To be honest, it’s a clever way to confess.” Patrick lets go of one of Bobby’s hands, and tilts the shorter man’s head up to face him. He gently sweeps the hair off Bobby’s forehead before reconnecting their hands. 

“And your cousin Jack was right. I am in love with you too. He’s also right in saying that you have my complete devotion, anything you ask, I’d do for you, because it’s you. Bobby, you’re my best friend, but you’re also the only person I’ve truly loved completely.” Bobby smiles, feeling like hell iced over, but Pat gets out of the car and Bobby willingly follows suit, locking the car behind him. 

Pat tugs Bobby close to him and Bobby laughs against Pat’s chest as the taller of the two wraps his arms around the other. They stay like that, their bodies as physically close as they can be, for a minute and a half. They each regard the other for a moment, before Bobby stands on tiptoe, and kisses Patrick. 

He whispers the words “I’ve got a crush on you.” 

Pat snorts, “Dork.”

[midnightuglystepsister]

(/ω＼)ﾟ.+(〃ﾉωﾉ)ﾟ.+°50 More Interesting Questions

Rules: fill this out and tag at least one person you’d like to know more about! Or just fill it out! Or don’t! Answer only some of them! Make up your own questions! “What kind of requirement is that”, you ask? A reasonable one! Who am I to tell you what to do? Anything goes!

tagged! by @kakihoden Thanks so much :D

1. What kind of food can’t you stand?: Really spicy food. I can’t do it bruh I cannnnn’t

2. If you could choose one minor inconvenience to never have to deal with again, what would you pick?: minor...inconvenience, hmmm...I guess to have a longer battery life on my phone, like....i can heavily use it for more than a day and still be good lol. 

3. Have you got any useless talents?: I uh, acting? It’s useless because I have stage fright now so I only use it for evil. Like, pranking someone. 

4. If you could be really really good at one thing, what would it be?: being proactive

5. Name a few people you think are extremely good-looking: there are a lot but I will list the /obvious/

Matsumoto Jun:

all of Arashi actually

GD

TOP

CL

ok i should stop but there’s a long list of these hahaha

6. What was your favorite way to pass the time as a kid?: watch TV, play video games, write stories, make comics

7. What is something you’re proud of?:  I’m proud of Arashi bc they’re a bunch of good guys that went through so much and now they’re successful and still humble and i have a lot of feelings im a proud arashian

8. What’s one character flaw in people that you just can’t tolerate?: Entitlement. Seriously, cut it out. esp amerikkka, and then there’s my older bro

9. Do you consider yourself to be more of a leader or a follower?: Both. At first, I let people lead, but if they can’t lead properly, or that no one is stepping up, I will take over.

10. What kind of student are/were you?: Pretty average I think. In the Philippines, I was average af, but I was outgoing and had a lot of friends. Then I moved to the US, and the education was much....uh lower? I was suddenly the smartest in class, and teachers favored me, and people hated me, but I just did my work. Then, I got older, I wasn’t as outgoing anymore and I just stuck to my group of friends and stayed quiet in class. Went back to being an average student also.

11. Butterfly effect question! Has there ever been a seemingly minor decision you’ve made (at the time) that ended up having a profound influence on your life?: Idk? I guess when I first started drawing? I didn’t think I was going to take art as my career at first.

12. Name your most irrational fear/aversion: People/Socializing? I stay at home to avoid socializing with people lol. I mean, I have social anxiety, so yeah

13. Are there any fictional characters you find especially relatable?: yes~ There’s always going to be relatable characters.

14. If you drink, what kind of drunk are you? Alternatively, what sort of person are you at parties?: I don’t drink alcohol. I hate the taste of it. At a party where I don’t know people? I find a nice corner and stay hidden. Probably on my phone at all times. At a party where I am friends with everyone? I speak to whomever is beside me. At a party with people I know and don’t know? I desperately stick to the people I know and only talk to them.

15. Do you fall in love easily? Or does it usually take a long time for you to trust someone?: I don’t think I have fallen in love. I’ve had crushes ofc. I have trust issues, I don’t trust anyone 100%.

16. Would you rather have one close friend or 100 casual friends?: one close friend

17. Do you consider yourself to be more of a slob or a neat-freak?: Man...in the middle? I can be a slob in my room, but I can’t stand messiness anywhere else? And at one point, I do clean and organize my room, so idk.

18. Describe a place (imaginary or real) that you would find incredibly cozy: a quiet area around nature. Like greens, or beachy, or just blue skies. Basically a Ghibli setting.

19. Do you have kids? If not, do you want them someday?: I don’t have kids and don’t want kids. I grew up caring for lots of kids, and I’m actually pretty good with them. I just don’t want one of my own.

20. What was your favorite book as a child?: I had a lot. I would seriously go to the library often, and borrow a giant stack of books. And the librarians knew me and never question me about being able to read all of them by the due date. They even had a limit of books you can borrow at a time, but they made me an exception hahaha. But I guess my first real obsession was Harry Potter...and then A Series of Unfortunate Events.

21. Name one thing you just don’t get what all the hype is about: lol yes despacito, fidget spinners, bottle flipping, and jake paul hahahaha

22. Name one thing that you think is tragically underrated: artists. Yes, I know there are many successful artists, but even now I hear stories of these successful artist getting ripped off, or getting low offers.

23. If you had to be glued to a person for a month, real or fictional (who you have never met), who would you choose?:  Real: Ninomiya Kazunari from Arashi. Because we both like to play video games and are very indoors-y lol. Fictional: Nico Meier from MidCin. Just think he would be really fun to hang out with, and his cheeriness will be contagious.

24. What’s something you’d like the chance to do someday?: Have my own art exhibit? And to also travel.

25. Do you typically speak your mind when you have a controversial opinion? Or do generally prefer to not rock the boat?: I’m straightforward, and will speak my mind on things I feel strongly about.

26. What’s the dumbest fad you’ve been caught up in?: I don’t think I’ve ever got caught up in a dumb fad.

27. What’s something you thought was cool as a kid/adolescent, but now cringe at yourself for?: I used to RP in real life with friends when I was a kid hahahahahaha hahbshasahahah ahaah

28. What’s a trait you consider to be very admirable?: Confidence. I admire confident people so much, and I wish to be confident and not this hot mess of self-hate.

29. Is there a particular kind of item people always tend to give you as gifts? (For instance, people always get you things with ducks on them because you like ducks, etc.): It varies on what these people know about me. For instance, I have one friend that gives me things from animes I like, another would give me art supplies, another would give me skincare products/makeup, my bro and his gf would give me shoes/handbags. It honestly varies on which of my side I show to each person.

30. Do you speak multiple languages? Which ones?: I speak Tagalog, English, I’ve taken classes on Japanese, American Sign Language, and trying to learn Korean and Mandarin.

31. Would you rather live in the big city or the countryside?: Can it be somewhere in the middle? ^-^; Like suburbs? lol. But if not, then big city.

32. Has there ever been something you were certain you’d hate, but ended up loving?: hmmm....I used to hate sushi when I was a kid. Now I eat it like 3x a week.

33. Do you mind being the center of attention, or do you prefer the spotlight to be on someone else?: It depends. In a big place with lots of strangers, I prefer the spotlight on someone else. In a group of people I know, then I want to be the center of attention. Ijustwannafeellovedlol

34. Favorite holiday?: Christmas.

35. Are you a more go-with-the-flow type of person, or do you need to have things planned meticulously?: I go-with-the-flow, but I’ve had instances where the flow was super messy and I got irritated and planned out the thing.

36. Is there something you loved so much you wish you could forget it and experience it all over again? (A tv show, book, series–anything.): Going to Hawaii to go to an Arashi concert lol

37. What hobbies do you have?: Drawing, playing video games, watching videos, listening to music, singing, playing with the dogs, writing, eating, traveling

38. If you could have a superpower, but it was only mildly useful, what ability would you want to have?: mildly useful...like it doesn’t work fully? Or it has some kinda flaw? I guess....teleporting? Like, my ideal teleporting kind of superpower is teleport anywhere in the world, but I guess if this is only mildly useful, then I can only teleport within a mile radius or something lol.

39. Something people are always surprised to learn about you: My age. Like, legit, every. single. time I say how old I am, everyone gets a shock. People think I’m waaaaay younger than I am lmaaaao.

40. Something that took you way too long to figure out: Not to have high expectations.

41. Worst injury you’ve had?: I don’t get injuries bc I avoid them lmao.

42. Any morbid fascinations?: uh i dont think so

43. Describe your sense of humor: self-deprecating humor, dark, sarcasm, and perverted humor.

44. If you had to be born in another era/place, which would you choose? I wouldn’t change my birthplace or year, bc every year or place has it’s shittiness. But if I /HAD/ to...I guess Japan? I have always liked their culture, aside from a few negative things from it. 

45. Something you are irredeemably bad at: sleeping, having motivation

46. Something that sucked but you’re glad you went through: Losing a few friends/my fam getting scammed, because I’ve learned something about people from it

47. Would you rather have a really godawful ugly tattoo in a place that is only slightly inconvenient to conceal with clothing (upper arm, thigh, etc.), or the coolest, most beautiful tattoo ever in the middle of your face? (Neither tattoo can be removed or concealed with makeup, and the ugly tattoo will deeply offend anyone who sees it.): Ugly tat, bc I can conceal with clothing.

48. Are you more of an optimist or a pessimist?: Realist, but borderline pessimistic

49. What would be the most flattering compliment someone could give you?: when people say I’m funny and witty. I was also strangely happy when someone said that I would have made a really handsome guy lmao. 

50. Something you feel people often misunderstand about you: Sometimes people find me scary, though sometimes I can be--when provoked, usually it’s just my face and my silence

Tagging: I want to know more about all of u, so if you do it, please @me!