#i love you agent washington…….

[xerith-42]

Every fucking day I think about how Tucker killed the Meta.

He killed him. It was the holes in his suit from Tucker stabbing him that ended Agent Maine's life.

Obviously it was a group effort. And Tucker would never take the full credit for the kill. Maybe throw in a snarky "I couldn't take him on my own then, but I totally could now." But he knows that they only beat the Meta because of their team effort.

But he dealt the killing blow.

I don't know how Tucker would react to hearing that's what happened. To read the official autopsy and see that Maine was killed by asphyxiation.

Especially after the stories he's heard from Wash and Carolina about their friend. Fond memories they occasionally indulge to remember the great man they once cared for, instead of the monster that took his place.

Tucker probably would feel... Bad. Even if neither one of them feel that way or blame him, there's still that guilt that he caused Washington even more pain than he's already been through. That one of the dead friends that haunts Carolina died by his hands.

They couldn't be more grateful to him. Agent Maine died a long time ago, and neither one can agree on when it happened. But it was before the Reds and Blues ever met him. Tucker didn't kill their friend, he freed them of the burden that was the Meta.

The monster they unwittingly helped to create.

Tucker helped them move on from the guilt of knowing there was something they could do but didn't.

It's only because the Meta is dead that Carolina can mourn Maine.

It's only because the Meta is dead that Wash can let himself have a friend like Maine again.

[koipalm]

i like the idea that locus is touchy

[slyvester101]

The real reason Wash is never seen without his armor is because he literally can’t handle any kind of temperature change.

Whether sweltering hot or freezing cold, Wash is in agony the whole time. You’d think after years of traversing extreme environments he’d get used to it, but no.

On the other hand, Tucker takes extreme temperatures like a champ. Cold temps? He’s basically a human heater anyways so why not? More of an excuse to cuddle with his partner. Hot temps? Just another excuse to get naked if you ask him.

Wash is glaring at Tucker through is AC controlled helmet as he lounges about in nothing but a tight pair of shorts in sun. Tucker is taunting Wash to step out of his armor and join him knowing full well that he’ll all but burst into flames if his pail white ass steps out into the heat.

[tvckerwash]

I feel like a massive missed opportunity when it comes to characterizing wash is that no one takes advantage of the fact that he's not a liar—in fact, he's extremely open and earnest—but despite that he is still able to hide the truth from everyone around him.

wash knows people, he intimately understands people, and he has mastered the ability to read between the lines to weaponize people's perceptions against them. when people think that you're just some silly little guy they let things slip that they would never say around anyone else, and while any other person might forget what you said—wash won't. wash will remember.

wash skillfully sweet talks his way straight into your heart with his sociable nature and genuine care and earnesty, and it's only when he's got a pistol pressed against your head or your face smashed into a mirror that you realize just how much you fucked up. you shouldn't have underestimated him and what he's capable of, you shouldn't have written him off.

in that moment you realize never understood wash—in fact you never knew anything about him at all, all you know is what he let you see. how much of what you know is real? how much of it is fake?

you don't know, you can't answer. but wash? he can answer those questions when it comes to you, because he was always there in the background, silently watching and listening, expertly redirecting and deflecting focus away from himself by acting like a harmless goofy dork or well meaning but gullible dumb ass.

[harbingersecho]

you only have to run the numbers to know sooner or later everybody's gotta go

[smilysstuff]

Sleepy Blues

[hipstersoulgushers]

the implication being the institution of Iowa State University and football both survive into the far future.

Anyway, Donut sharing the state culture is what I'm all about.

[i-need-lavernius-tucker]

Rvb tumblr PLEASE tell me you know about Crash i need to scream about it

[nelliebachesneg]

Guys.

Guys I'm going insane.

In the memory unit, right before he lets Tex go, Epsilon says this to Caboose, Tucker, and Tex who he thinks is about to leave:

"And if you see Agent Washington, tell him I said memory is the key. He'll know what that means. Oh and also, tell him I said thanks."

The world is ending as far as Epsilon knows, so why would Epsilon make a point of getting the message "memory is the key" to a memory construct of Wash? It can't be to let Wash know that Epsilon was still alive ("Delta was telling me Epsilon was still alive" S6, the iconic reveal speech). If the world really is ending, like Epsilon thinks it is, Wash would have no hope of bringing Epsilon back for another iteration.

So again, why would Epsilon tell him "memory is the key" and add that Wash will "know what it means"?

Answer:

Because Epsilon says to Tex in his big S9 goodbye speech:

"Don't you get it? You were the memory. You were the key."

If Wash - even just Epsilon's memory construct of Wash - heard Tex deliver the message "memory is the key", and presumably then figured out that the message was from Church aka Alpha (or so he thinks because timelines are weird in the memory unit), what would he think that meant?

Wash would know that Church figured it out. Wash would know that Church was letting the memory of Tex go.

Not convinced?

Epsilon makes a point to thank Wash, implying that Wash is part of the reason he figured it out at all. No, actually, that's an understatement; Wash is a huge part of the reason Epsilon figured this out, because Wash is the one who gets it. Epsilon was inside his fucking head imploding from the memory of loosing Allison, but Wash could see through the grief and understand the pain it was causing all the agents of the program. That's why he wanted revenge against PFL, why he went after Epsilon in the first place, why Delta told him memory was the key. Wash understood that one man's grief could and did make life hell for everyone else:

Alpha: "What do we do with it [Epsilon]?"

Wash: "We take it. And we get it into the hands of someone who can use all its information. Then they can bring down the person responsible for what was done to Alpha, and to me, and to my friends. They can take down the Director."

And even if you ignore all of that, if nothing else, Wash was the one who made sure Epsilon lived long enough to figure things out. Wash led the Reds and Blues to get him out of the PFL archives in season 6, saving him from the emp blast. Wash helped save Epsilon from the Meta at the end of season 8, even if it was for selfish reasons.

Wash saved Epsilon, in every sense of the word, both despite and because of what Epsilon did to him.

Fuck, man.

[fischiee]

casual violence as affection with the carwash sibs... carolina throwing a knife at wash when he is being annoying and him just casually batting it away or grabbing it out of the air and smirking at her knowing he got to her...... sinking a fork into the table millimeters away from their hand if they try to steal something off the others plate... hitting each other just too hard when they're teasing.. chasing each other down with they say something mean and no one knowing if its going to end in them giggling and wrestling or another broken arm

[venln]

They got bitches in rvb0? Gay bitches?

[justtkatt]

Totally not thinking of how Wash is already a hardened soldier by the time he gets into pfl but the reason why he seems alot dorkier during it is because he became comfortable with the other agents and trusted them

[the-poppy-outie-effect]

RED VS BLUE FANS!

I was thinking about trans hcs in the rvb fandom, tiering the levels of average to bonkers and the popularity of each character being trans in my brain, but i don't know if my opinions are universal

Rb for sample size and, if you feel like it, drop everyone you hc as trans in the tags!

[slyvester101]

I know this is another ask so soon lol but how do you think Wash's and Tucker's relationship would go if Tucker was in season 6? Tbh I already have my own interpretation that they are instant enemies, Wash's worst nightmare and it took the personification of a aqua sim trooper. Their stubbornness knows no bounds and it's worst when they met before having their character development. Someone has to hold Tucker back before he gets murdered by a trigger happy freelancer for not shutting tfu.

Ask away my fine fellow

I think if Tucker was with the reds and blues during season 6, there’d be a lot more roasting of Agent Washington. Church and Tucker bounce off of each other, sending rib after rib to anyone in the area, including the other. Which means that Wash has to deal with twice the amount of insults and bickering. It is easier to manage Caboose since Tucker was the one to keep an eye on him when Church left Blood Gulch first (because Church always leaves first) and he is much better at keeping Caboose on track than Church. 

While I do think Agent Washington dislikes Tucker when they meet, he also recognizes how smart and resourceful the guy is and sees the potential he has and how much he's holding back in order to be underestimated. It makes him wary. Additionally, I think Tucker’s flirting and care-free attitude reminds him a lot of York, so he has to deal with that while also trying to command a guy who reminds him of his dead friend. He tries to stay away from Tucker as much as possible. (It does not work, they fight all the damn time)

(They both consider murder many times)

Tucker is definitely more wary of Agent Washington as well and questions everything he commands and undermines his authority all the time. So basically Tucker being Tucker. Tucker would also be more grumpy about being on this mission since it took him away from his son (if Tucker was to join without completely breaking the timeline, I think it would make more sense for him to go to the desert temple after the whole epsilon and Meta showdown). He would also hold a personal vendetta against Wash since he would be there when Church dies and make that link to his best friend dying to Agent Washington, which means when they meet again, Tucker is down and ready to rip this guy apart.

All this would make Wash’s eventual addition to the team a bit more strained and awkward. Tucker is even more petty and even downright mean to Wash because of everything that happened and takes much longer to warm up to him. Wash takes it with the same amount of grace as always, trying to be diplomatic about it and be a good teammate (I don’t think Tucker would be as willing to call Wash “team leader” after everything that happened, so they decide to be something like co-leaders since Tucker is the highest-ranking soldier and a pretty good fighter in his own right and Wash has the most experience). 

They’re basically begrudging parents to Caboose by the time Carolina shows up. They bicker like an old married couple worthy of competing against Grimmons. (Tucker shows he’s finally warming up to him when he stops calling Wash various names like “agent fuckface” “agent friend killer” “agent team wiper” and starts calling him “Wash”)

While they go planet hopping with Carolina, Tucker learns about Wash and his time with freelancer and he realizes how absolutely fucked up he is (he knew he had issues, but holy shit). He’s a bit more willing to work with Wash, and to some extent Carolina, near the end and after their mission to kill the director. (That whole scene where Wash choses to protect Tucker from Carolina, choses blue team over freelancer, is the day Tucker finally accepts Wash as his friend.)

By the time they crash on Chorus, I think Tucker and Wash have really mellowed their relationship and have learned to rely on each other. They’re the dynamic duo, the one-two punch that leaves you reeling, a scary ass pair for anyone they face. Even after Church leaves again, Tucker and Wash don’t have that power dynamic of “anxious ex-specops authority figure” and “angsty asshole who hates following orders” since they’ve spent a lot of time learning how to work together as blue team leaders. Tucker is still angsty and Wash is still paranoid, but it’s more of a partnership than the mentorship we see Wash having with Tucker in the og show.

I think it makes their separation on Chorus even more heartbreaking for the both of them since they’ve gotten so close. They haven’t trusted someone like this in a long time, someone who’s so good at reading them and knowing when to give encouragement but also not afraid to call out your bullshit. It also makes their reunion so fucking awesome because they can finally let down their guard a little and trust someone else to pick up some of the load. 

I don’t know how it would change the course of the rest of the show since I’ve only watched up to season 12, but I think at that point it’s basically the same as it would be in the show.

[ramble-writes]

I love how in the Agent Washington tag I'm seeing a sudden rise of Carwash siblings and I'm going to cry thank you I love them very muCH YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW MUCH I LOVE THESE TWO AND JUST HAVING THIS DYNAMIC AND ALL THE HCS POPPING UP

[ehhgg-art]

there is a broken record player in my brain that repeats the words “agent washington” all day long and the moment it breaks i might just kill myself