#i love this bc its so stupid and dumb
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
in my head mind is more mentally/verbally violent towards heart and heart is more physically violent towards mind, since the "mind" is more an abstract concept than the "heart", who is named after a literal physical body part. not that heart doesn't attack mind verbally or mind doesn't ever get physical with heart, just that they prefer their respective methods because of their respective roles.
and it just makes more sense for their characters, too, in that mind would feel superior to heart, in that he only cleverly points out all that is inferior about him, and would never go down to his level by getting physical, (despite his insults clearly being an outlet for his anger/frustration at their dissonance) and in that heart, the manifestation of the best and worst of all emotions and all of their impulsive desires, would lash out physically(see:Juno Incident) in an attempt defend himself/to be seen as equal(following his own twisted logic/justification for his actions, and later trying to explain them)
tldr: my hc is that mind is mentally strong but not so much physically, heart is physically strong but not so much mentally, they prefer to attack each other in ways they know the other is weaker
#does this make sense? im running on two hours of sleep waiting on the bus and its very cold#chonny jash#cccc#chonnys charming chaos compendium#cccc analysis#also am i stupid for thinking of this. is this obvious to everyone am i just dumb or is this smart. i cant tell im so tired#jaggy posts#also i feel like inshould be explaining heart first bc its heart then mind then soul like thats their order. but i love mind so too bad#i explain mind first then heart sorry hesrt#fuck it. not drafting im straight up posting
67 notes
·
View notes
Text
"They were never really that close pre-death" "Dick was mean to Jason before warming up" etc etc are the worst Dick&Jason takes possible. Why would you even say that about them
#my dc posting#jason todd#dick grayson#robin#jaybin#discowing#<- bc its abt that time period#my favourite interpretation of them is well. they were the og batsiblings. the first ones to meet n develop that bond out of all of them#they went from strangers to friends to brothers in my mind. but dc is stupid and wont give me that#and fandom is dumb bc they keep pulling this shit of dick having misplaced his anger towards jason or being cold towards him and its like#why would you write that. like in my personal opinion its literally just not good??#like straight up its just a bad decision for their relationship#the point that makes jason's death so sad is that he was loved. he was happy. its what makes it a fucking tragedy#but noooo dick was horrible to jason. source? uhh trust me bro. are there any benefits or point to this being in the story? uhhhh well uh#(no no there arent)#it adds nothinggggg of value its such a bad take i hate ittt#give me jaybin & dick being brothers or give me death#n im not saying i want them to have been perfect or non complicated or anything but just. this slander wears at me ._.
124 notes
·
View notes
Text
kon sweetie im so fucking sorry that someone would even say something stupid like that oh my god.
#rimi talks#paraphrasing the beyonce gif bc i dont remember exactly how it goes but.#sometimes people follow me and i really genuinely don't know why at all because their blog header and desc make it extremely clear#that they are someone i want on my block list PRONTO. like. what are you doing. why are you coming into my house#have i not made it clear enough that i hate that shit. why are you trying to follow me. get OUT of my activity page block button SAVE MEEE#PEOPLE WHO ACTUALLY READ COMICS AND ARENT STUPID SAVEEE MEEEEEEEE#anyway i apparently have not been clear enough about my opinions so let me speak my truth.#i think jason todd is really fucking annoying. i don't like 99% of fan content about him and i don't like 99% of his fans.#i think that jay // tim is a dumb ship and i think that jay // kon is an even worse one and i think jay// tim// kon// sucks SHIT#i also think that you should simply read comics before you start posting about the characters from said comics.#like i recognize that i cant stop anyone from posting bad opinions but i would love to not see them <3#anyway im chasing people out with a broom. OUT OF MY HOUSE. OUT. OUT#IM A COMICS BLOGGER. NOT A ''BAD TELEPHONE GAME ABOUT SOMETHING SOMEONE HEARD ABOUT A COMIC ONCE'' BLOGGER#OUT OF MY HOUSE ! ! ! !! ! ! !!#merry shitscram. now scram your shit and go. is this anything#<- i have to make bad jokes or ill die. you understand.#and like tbc this was just case of ''blog desc header and top posts were all really fucking annoying''#and not ''something actively harmful or evil'' like its fine its just Extremely deeply not my cup of tea yk#but i do also have to be dramatic about reading words in an order that i really hated sometimes. or i will also die.#anyways. take my hand. read superman (1987) 155
40 notes
·
View notes
Text
thinkign about how alone and unloved morty was for all his life and rick was the first time anyobdy ever put such an amount of intense attention and dependency onto him . and rick had a whole new family and losing them made him stop seeing the value in other people as a whole and morty was the one and first thing that woke him up
#really long Tag rant down there#one of the most Things Ever about them to me is how morty barely even understands just how much rick loves him. more than anything#and its something ricks done on purpose hes made sure of it#because hes so weak he cant handle it#them being together is agony in avsolutely every way and sense but also theyre the best part of eachothers lives#morty because nobodys payed attention to him quite like rick has and all the exciting space adventures and rick just cause. he literally#just likes him thats it. and he never knew it#also i was thinking of this earlier. one of the reasons season 1 is soooo good to me is cuz you get to see morty grow on rick in real time#stuff like that moment where morty walks through the door and rick is instantly at the sight of him SUPER excited and he goes hey!!! but#then he clears his throat and goes Hey trying to pretend like this dumb scaredy kid isnt becoming his favourite thing hes ever known day af#er day#and goddamn night shaym aliens. in that moment where he realised morty had been fake the whole time i rlly wonder what he was thinking and#how he felt. like. oh man this is messing with me way too much this is Bad#and then he got drunk over it and yknow. that . is it post credits. i think. that scene#n literally At the Very beginning he was tired n drunk n stupid thinking like man fuck this im gonna blow this place up and do what prime#did to me. But he brought morty with him Even just at that point it flashed in his mind and he absolutely could not bear to let morty die#Breathes in#im rewatching in October bc anniversary month. i literally can’t wait im so actually impatient i considered just doing it today So hard#odiespeak
36 notes
·
View notes
Text
my hot take of the day is that clearly the people who swallow the in universe targ & valyrian exceptionalism are being completely taken in by the exact system that george is trying to critique but also i think the people who over correct into this idea that not a single targaryen is worthy of like, our empathy or sorrow or are rightfully chafing against the structures put in place by valyrians, first men, and andals alike are also being incredibly 2d in their analysis. i feel like this happens most often when people try to make the case that andals are somehow oppressed in westerosi society on a cultural level simply bc valyrian supremacy trumps andal culture. i think this is incredibly silly to say or posit as the truth in universe because there is in fact some oppression of culture in westeros but it’s not the andals lol!!! it’s the first men, the dornish, the rhoynar/greenblood orphans, and the ironborn. there Is some level of,,,, idk bigotry/xenophobia towards valyrians but only valyrians who don’t worship the faith - people like larra rogare, who still follow valyrian gods, do face this bigotry because they’re Too Foreign, the same way someone like thoros, melisandre, taena, etc who are essosi but not from a still heavy valyrian-based society like volantis and lys, and that’s definitely important to the conversation, because it shows the Dominant Culture is in fact the Andal culture when it comes to westeros and that’s like,,, fine, and even more interesting to me to see how andals, who have been the dominant force on westeros for thousands of years, interact with valyrians, who clearly want to keep ideas of valyrian supremacy alive somehow and essentially try to get the other dominant force in westeros to buy in (which they do!). like, are these two at odds sometimes? yes! but i don’t think it’s correct to say that the andals face ~prejudice for being andals or followers of the faith either!
#like certainly people in fandom get insane about the andals bc they’re projecting their hate of catholicism onto them.#but george himself is not writing about how all catholics are inherently evil he’s writing about the STRUCTURE being evil. i think the#series in fact finds something useful in one person’s individual faith & the way they may internalize it. that’s why we get the quiet isle!#getting on my soap box#yes i did see a post about the [redacted] being oppressed by the mean evil valyrians and rolled my eyes.#anyways like this idea that the valyrians are being forcibly assimilated? false! they are doing it very willingly as a matter of fact! aegon#and jaehaerys and viserys all in fact are clearly trying to mesh themselves with andals not bc they are forcing the family to assimilate#but bc they believe the only way to keep valyrian supremacy going is to team up with the culture in westeros that Does frequently impose#itself on its neighbors! i’m not saying the andals are like the ultimate big bad evil here either that’s just as stupid as the knee jerk#‘every targ is evil and anyone who fights them is morally corrupt’ thing that happens in this dumb ass fandom but i AM saying the andals cut#down every weirwood in the south & attempted to do like glorified missionary work in the iron islands instead of actually engaging w what it#is that makes the ironborn so fucking deranged.#anyways the only leaders who are unproblematic are mors and nymeria for managing to mesh two cultures in a way that wasn’t insane aksjdj#dorne has its problems re: deeply entrenched class structures & the use of marriage as punishment but at least people aren’t whipping#ellaria naked through the streets like the andals love to do to essosi women 😭😭#‘oh didn’t dorne oppress the rhoynar’ i said they were better not perfect thank you!!!!! aksjd
26 notes
·
View notes
Text
THE ORDER OF PALMS An order of holy folk that serve The Helm, working to create powerful Aasimar Paladins for the purpose of protecting any who hire their help. [BACKSTORY UNDER CUT]
One day, Gjör and her peers were lead by their mentor Opheria, to a mission far from their home. On the peak of that mountain village, they saw upon the horizon, the castle of their home go up in flames. Horrified and scared, the apprentices sought to follow their mentors guidance, and followed her lead into a small barn. It was there, that Opheria proceeded to slaughter each and everyone of the apprentices. It seemed she somehow had a hand in this sudden attack on the Order of Palms. Gjör D'annevual survived a sword through the 'heart', on account of a rare condition, that places her heart on the other side of her chest. When she finally managed to bring herself back home, the Order was insulted by her survival. She had so many better peers, why couldn't any of them have survived? This runt was seriously the only thing that survived Opherias wrath? It was better to just wash their hands clean of this. Thus the Order decided to banish Gjör from their ranks. She now travels the land in search of a purpose.
#luckys original content#dungeons and dragons#MY OCSSSS MY WONDERFUL OCSSS ITS BEEN SO LONGGGG!!this is a fairly old character that i made foreeeever ago#i was trying to go full on into DND LORE ONLY instead of makin up my own stuff. so when i was lookin around i learned abt THE HELM#the god of protection or watever it was. i also like playing paladin bc i love to hit things w my sword. i also like aasimars bc theyrprett#im sure i ahd other Min Maxy reasons for her but i dont have her sheet n ive forgotten everything. never got a chance to play her but yknow#maybe someday. I LIKE HER ALOT TOO. big and strong and well meaning but a lil dumb. justa lil dense n stupid. but she tries!!#I LIKE CHARACTERS THAT HAVE JUST SMALL THINGS DIFERENT ABT THEM. i knew some1 who had that condition. where everythings just flipped#aint that fucked up? that ur organs can just be flipped? and inever see it in fiction. its so neat. imagine finding out like THIS too#she had blacked out from the sword through the heart. the last thing she heard from her mentor was;#'you were a great student. that is why you above all else must die. i hope you understand' spoken through a gentle voice and a gentle smile#the very same that had guided Gjör so far through her journey.A BETRAYAL LIKE NO OTHER! she awoke utop a pile of comrades#each bloodied and dead and cold. she used her own magic to heal herself. to catch herself from the precipice of bleeding out#when she stepped out of the barn she had found that the village was burned to the ground#she was shellshocked!! it took her weeks to limp all the way back down that mountain. all the way back to the place she called home#only to be spit on and kicked back out. being a Paladin of the Palms was her entire life. what was she to do now?#OH SO THE ART. I RLY LIKE HER DESIGN.heavily based off of THE BABY SITTER from HALO LEGENDS. i fuckin love halo so much guys.....#i just love that trope of Big Strong Person in Armor that we all thought wasa fullgrown MAN takes off the helmet to revel shesa PRETTY GIRL#my favorite in the WORLD!! i also like the silly frilly pretty dress sorta motif in gjors armor. it hides all the stuff i dont wanna draw#thats all the ramble i got in me for now. PLEASE ENJOY. and ask me abt my ocs
32 notes
·
View notes
Text
always think abt being able to commission ppl regularly one day like its my Big Dream. i occasionally commission ppl when i have th money . i have a Massive list of plush makers saved tht i dream of commissioning one day
#bc i CAN'T sew. i mean i can kinda sew but not well. ppl that can take fabric and make it into 3 dimensional art r so cool#one day i WILL have heat miser plush that i can add warm water bottle to so he can be comfy and warm 2 hold:)#and i WILL have a weighted uncle fester plush tht is like 1 million pounds .#dunno when#but i am Manifesting(tm) it. LOL#frank.txt#also squidward plush that doesnt look fuckig stupid. i love my bootleg squidward plush(called Disney Squidward on account of his disney tag#but he unfortunately looks rlly dumb. so#a squidward plush tht looks cute would b nice. but idk how thats feasible bc his face is kinda fucked up#doesnt translate well to like. not just stuffies but like figurines as well like he always looks so fucked up#curse of squidward.... curse of most.of my favs tbh#official duck guy dhmis plush isn't too bad but i saw it in person and its rlly rlly cheaply made for a $30 plush...
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
might sound weird to say as a person with a couple ocs who have Big Horrible Event(s) in their backstories or as a person who has like 3 ocs total bc he sucks at writing and as a person who hopes their ocs arent too Boring with [the thing im about to mention] but the thing about writing [characters] and [people] is that like.
any little thing a person experiences can take up their whole existence... its actually something "fun" to experience as i meet new ppl and do more things. My friend had something happen that she'll be talking about forever. I had several things happen last year that ill never stop talking about, some of which other ppl think werent that bad actually. In the same way I'll forever remember about the way my sister accidentally insulted me almost 10 years ago, it's really interesting and Fun to find and assign smaller things like that to characters...its really Real. some people's dealbreakers are other people's solvable problems etc etc
#(as well as the opposite: Big Event that maybe shocks everyone around em but they genuinely werent shaken by)#though this one is more common and leads to those ''ohh i didnt know that was normal oops'' moments#talkys#inspired by recent me and friend events#and also recent events where i told sum ppl more stuff about Thing and they responded as if it wasnt a big deal. but it was to me.#and also how i thought a part of al's childhood backstory was kind of maybe dumb and not realistically as impactful as id expect#but i saw someone on reddit almost word for word write that as their experience and how its shaped em as a person#and thats it like... the small things are boring and hard to keep track of sometimes#its not like you'll include every single little event your oc was shaped by in their bio#but idk. its like Fun to piece together for fun. to mold a human being#ykwim? wld be silly to tell everyone ''oh my oc struggles with self image due to many instances like... when their sister called em ugly''#or write it anywhere but it is fun to Know and have in your head. and its real !#just like if a friend told you about something that happened to em#long post#delete later#sorry i keep saying stupid obvious shit lately ive always been bad at oc making AND socializing so im learning everything late#but anyway yes. idk even as i keep making ocs that are ''similar'' its like. every person so different#people can react to anything in any way for any reason. i love people#this is why i struggle a bit with keeping ocs to archetypes i guess bc like. what is ooc for an oc. people contain contradictions all the#time. you can change yourself at any time.#ok nobody will read this far so ill go to the real insane rambling#part of this has been a part of my chats with talon while trying to get him to share more info#like. yeah ok you're 400+ years old the things that happened to you were such a comparatively small part of your life#but humans dont live as long and think about small things until they die. i dont think time would heal all wounds actually. not all of em#some thoughts just always come to gnaw at your brain. its ok to not be over things. i feel ill never be over some things#and also complainerism can be fun but thats something else entirely wee hee ^_^
65 notes
·
View notes
Text
its been so long since human content/new content with no book relevancy even the youtubers and theorists like dawko and john are getting restless😭
#dawko going its not gonna happen steel wool right over glamfred and rhe humans not coming back#and john going 'im... totally okay with that happening 😐' about mimics story being spoiled in the books 2 years before sotm#like dude even theyre feeling it#dawko would love a fnaf game about absolutely nothing so his excitment about sotm makes sense#but its refreshing seeing john actually criticize it bc it deserves to be even if it was really tame and not really explicitly said#we understand and its just. so nice seeing someone like john actually aware of how stupid it id#instead of everyone being okay with it and not criticizing it for some reason#even tho it kind of sucks#like john is one of the last surviving theorists and a big figure in the community#seeing him actually not shy away from at least implying he thinks its bad and dumb in a video is just.#soo refreshing#like so many times i felt like i was insane for disliking all the mimic theories before ruin came out#i thought it was boring. mimic is a book villain#its so sad seeing john try to actually theorize about mimic in an interesting way with a satisfuing narrative that isnt just c&p#but it just turns out that actually yeah. its game is a rerun of its book lore that came out years ago#and we spent three entire years foreshadowing and teasing 'carnival' in games to hype this game up and its just c&p book lore nothing new#except the new shit being like. stuff about OG freddys and og characters which. are not explaining the mimics backstory#its just like whyy did they do it like this. and they shafted basically every single thing else to do it for years#no wonder dawko is starting to actually joke about them never bringing them back and john is implying his distaste#pandas.txt#discourse#sorryyyyy#its just like i think about sotm and im like i dont need to be that hard on it. theres nothing inherently wrong with a game explaining#mimics backstory#and then i remember how it was spoiled 2 years earlier in the books and everybody already knows its story and theres nothing#new about the mimic in this game save for a random new form#and im like yeah nevermind its okay to be critical about it they somehow handled the mimics story in the worst way possible#up to this point#like if youre a fan of literally anything else in the story youll resent mimic at least a little bit for how much it hijacked everything#even all mimic fans are getting are reruns of shit they already know
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
girl help i'm infodumping about the hq!! connect theme in the comments of a sarah pavan video lmaoooo
#like. theyll get it i know they will#but also. i feel kinda silly stupid becauseeee guess what its bc i care about it#and whenever i care about stuff i feel all dumb and just wanna say nothing#which is LAME#i WILL infodump and i WILL hit post#😤😤#x#why does talking about the connect theme especially make me feel like the always sunny meme with the connecting strings etc#i feel like it SOUNDS insane#but also. its all literally right there in the text lmao#ive got so many posts about it. so many. and with sources aakhjsaks#its volleyball. its friendship. its love. its life#babeeyy
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
Every times he talks he lets his sentences linger, I hate him sm lol
Beside the fact he's the first to talk and bring up the 'enemy'-bit about Terasu (which I assume he 'heard' from Kongo altho why phrase it like that Goshiki istg-)(he makes me think as if he heard it from someone else. The fact a Yakuza boss died and left a 10 years old son behind (perhaps heir?) should cause a stir tho, so maybe the information comes from outside.. About whether the others knew about it too or Goshiki was the one to tell them right here tho, hm...) his words are also the most neutral? Kou, Satsuki and Torazo straight-up denigrate him, in different ways sure but still. Goshiki though, he's just like 'oh so it's you/him'. He's not letting how he feels about it shows? if he even feels something about it. His expression is the same as always, albeit toned down (his smile is smaller).
Shio is the first to talk to Terasu, then Satsuki and Torazo follow. Kou talked out loud as if Terasu wasn't here, and Goshiki really just talked to himself
Compared to the three others (Shio not counted), he doesn't outright attack Terasu. The use of the word 'enemy' is the only thing that makes it seem hurtful, but to as whether it truly was... uh. Plus, factually that's what Terasu's father was, and what Terasu is. Terasu's mom also called the Yotsurugi 'enemies' and so does Terasu at that time. That's just how it is.
Not talking about how every kids seem to be here but the rest outright just ignore Terasu at this moment.
And in parallel to that, his first second line in the chapter 1 as him talking about 'allies'. Why does he focus so much on allies and enemies. He's always the one bringing it up.
He (possibly) keeps an ear on the enemies, and keeps an eye on the allies. He's the one who sees how important connections are, if not being the one who uses them the most because he knows their potential.
Also, yeah, okay, he doesn't end every single one of his sentences with '...' but let me have this one
First, wtf was that reaction to Shio at the funeral? Him <- the face of a man who's absolutely serious about it but also absolutely not impacted by it. Sure Shio brings a chill because he's imposing and all, but Goshiki really couldn't care less look at him. Where does he feel threatened about Shio. He's so unfazed. Clown/Jester behavior honestly
And then Hibaru announces Shio isn't the family successor??? And Goshiki is the most expressive about it (we ignore Terasu rn bc that ain't about him, plus, different context)??? Sure, Shio's expression is quite something, that man is angry, but all the other siblings we see are taking Hibaru's speech lightly, they even seem to see through his lie(Shikaba) or to not care about it (/who would be named the next boss) (Taira) at all. And then there's Goshiki. Why would he be so surprised I don't know, but damn if it isn't hilarious
#he pisses me off so bad i need to punch him (pos)#PLS HIM AT THE FUNERAL WAS SO FUNNY. WHATS THAT. AT FIRST HES NOT SERIOUS AND THEN HES THE MOST DUMB-LOOKING(bc of his reaction)???#the fact its the same character makes it even more funny#hes the yotsurugi comic relief srry i dont make the rules#ahlàlà... i love imagining thing when we have so little of them#18 chapters and 4 lines from him. and my brain comes with this amount of nonsense. crazy.#so far the goshiki i made up in my mind is the definition of 'being smart has never stopped me from being stupid'#he plays his cards well methinks. but hes still surprised by obvious things#i need to stop#nna goshiki#goshiki yotsurugi#goshiki negai no astro#goshiki astro royale#nna#negai no astro#astro royale
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
guy trapped in a hell of his own creation: haha ive never done anything wrong in my entire life. and im always right:] anyway. why did my little brother move out:(
its so funny to me that at first glance tashi seems like hed be the most 'normal' out of all the clones but at least all the others are slowly healing n shit while hes just getting more and more insane each day and one day hell snap and explode and maim someone
#my art#my funky guys#HES SO FUCKING STUPID.#tashi im sorry ily but youre literally the dumbes fucking motherfucker ive ever seen. and a cringe loser. never change king<3#like. this guy realised he was a clone when he was a month old and decided to base his new personality entirely#on the idealised version of the original he made up in his head.#like he did this to himself!!! he chose to revolve his entire personality around being a 'perfect flawless mom friend'!!!!!!!#in his head hes like the most selfless & altruistic person to ever walk the earth but in reality hes a sad selfish mess who just wants to#be loved.#he started out as a pretty nice and level headed guy who wanted to help ppl but then it just spiraled when he made that his entire#personality bc of his inability to move on from a lie he really wanted to be true.#he percieves shiro as this perfect flawless leader figure and he wants DESPERATELY to imitate that. deep down its not enough for him to#simply coparent and share responsibility w the others. no no no he has to be The Leader and do everything himself!#this mindset results in him later on starting to dismiss and undervalue his familys work and commitment to keeping them all alive-#esp soup. like sHE WAS THERE W HIM FROM THE VERY BEGINNING THEY ARE EQUALS THEY ARE BOTH EQUALLY IMPORTRANT#AND HES SO FAR UP HIS ASS HE FORGOT. somewhere along the line he forgot. he missed the point. he spiraled too deep.#and he knows. he knows but hes so terrified of change and growth and admitting he CANT do this alone.#he wants to be a cool epic capable solo leader AND he craves family and connection soooo badly he cant live w/o his loved ones.#so yeah. hes an angry little pathetic freak<3 i love him#despite all that hes not a bad person. just a flawed guy thrown into a situation so stressful and traumatising that he clinged to the only#coping mechanism he had at the time and just sorta. ran with it.#dw he gets better tho! it takes a lot and his and sticks relationship is strained for a LONG time but he slowly gets better. good for him
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
i remember thinking in the shower one day “it sucks remembering a funny onision joke. bc like you cant tell anyone. bc its onision. fortunately i forgot. so win?
#i loooved onision as a kid. oh fun fact when i first used cai i think i had seen a post about him or something? bc i picked onision as the#first thing i messed with. maybe one day ill share but it ended with me calling him dad and him like tearing up and going i love you son#so dumb my fav thing to do when i first played with it was pretend to be like 6. and mess with william afton bots and try to get them to#kill me. tjis was before i knew you could swipe and regenerate messages so they were. absolutely awful sooo long.#i remember one i was telling will to get a divorce and i was like ‘you can not be married its called the vorce’ and he sort of ignored it#until he snapped and was like ‘ITS NOT CALLED THE VORCE YOU STUPID KID I SHOULD KILL YOU’#then i started using max. then i started playing seriously. life over#ummm. should i tag this with cai bc thats. all of the tags#well. theyre part of the post. so yes#simons spouting#characterai
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
I am 20 years too late (legitimately) but for the hospital/ amnesia arc in the Boys Over Flowers manga is wild.
I just got to Umi saying it’s a chance at a fresh start and the violence and the speed I would recreate the rooftop scene of the ending of ERASED without the safety trampoline for that girl specifically is crazy.
And Rui coming in CLUTCH to lay the law and defend his bestie. HE DID NOT GO THROUGH ALL THAT JUST TO HAVE THIS GIRL POP UP AND INVALIDATE THEIR EMOTIONS AND SHES NOT MAIN CAST.
If there’s one man I can count on it’s Rui. He’s my #1. MY MAN!!! If he has a million fans I’m one of them, if he has only one it’s me. I’m lighting a candle for him every day.
#LIKE ITS OVER#boys over flowers#LIKE DAMN DOES MAKINO MEAN NOTHING#RUI and her friends are such real ones#I don’t even know if I could handle an amnesia plot line in my love life#no like ever since NY like I cannot look at our leading love man the same it is just so….#like you were really stupid truly and I can’t hate him bc you know what she was dumb too but it took her 3 seconds to turn back not months#I have been reading this for the past 24 hours legitimately I AM ADDICTED I NEED HELP
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
fuck
#like idk i never realized just how bad she hurt me. i didnt even rly realize she hurt me at all#bc there are so so so many ways she sldve reacted so much worse. but like i never thought someone cld just straight up ignore it.#like i get the way i told her was dumb and confusing. ok. i can understand that. whatever#but idk. she said she wished my sister had told her years earlier so that she cldve helped her back then#but then suddenly it's different when it's me. suddenly it's 'but youve always been my little girl' and 'oh i dont know that sounds dangerou#s' and 'are you sure?' and 'how long have you felt like this'#well it's been almost 5 fucking years now and it hasnt changed. i havent changed. fuck#i trusted her. i trusted her to be there for me and to support me and to accept me and she threw it back in my face and never even blinked#i can never ever trust her again and she doesnt care. she doesnt even know bc shes so wrapped up in all the fucking lies she tells herself#fuck. she did everything wrong. fuck. i can never fully trust anyone with this part of me again bc of her#and it's awful bc it's such an important part of me. it brings me so much joy and i think on it often and i love myself for it#but it's just simmering in my chest and every time i think of letting it hit air again i freeze bc i thought it was safe once and it WASNT.#i wanted to get my name changed before high school. i wanted to start the medical process. i wanted all the thing i thought shed do for me.#my wants and my understanding of my identity has changed now but it still hurts.#it hurts so bad to see other ppl my age get all of that and to have the support of their family and to not be afraid to put a name to it all#im happy for them. but it's so awful hearing her point those ppl out w no self awareness like oh thats so good for them isnt that sweet#I AM RIGHT HERE! YOU COULD BE DOING ALL OF THAT! I NEEDED YOU TO BE THAT FOR ME!#and every time she does acknowledge it she gets it completely wrong or it's just to bemoan how little she understands#'oh everyones changing their name now its so confusing' 'im really trying i dont know what else you want from me' NO YOURE NOT! YOURE NOT!#YOUVE NEVER BEEN WILLING TO TRY. NOT FOR ME.#you never fucking loved me you loved the idea of what you thought i would be and you cant fucking let it go even when the truth is staring#you dead in the face. fuck. you complain about how i 'hate you' or 'think youre stupid' well maybw treat me with an ounce of respect and act#like you understand the things youve EXPLICITLY BEEN TOLD. even a little.#but honestly it's too late. if she were to suddenly have a change of heart now i wouldnt give a damn.#the damage is done you dont get to have this part of me and act like youre such a good and supportive mother.#i cant even say i hate her. i love her but shes hurt me more than anyone else ever has and i can never trust her to actually love me or even#fucking see me or support anything about me that actually matters to me#i dont know. i dont know. thinking about it again.#ive thought abt telling my dad. not bc it wld do any good but bc ik he values honesty and maybe hed throw me a 'damn that sucks'#my sister said this is something i have to fight on but she doesnt get it. i have no ground to stand on as far as shes concerned
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
omg my momma got me my very own car yippee!!
#personal#my face#kind of#YES im nearly 30 and i still learning to drive listen i had shit to do!!!#this is MY car.... my baby... 🥹#it has a hand clutch instead of the stupid foot clutch.. and and i can see over the steering wheel!! im so short ive always had to reach aa#my mom and step-dad got it for me bc they noticed how depressed i have been lately and how much i isolate myself#so this was motivation to have more independance and not feel ball and chain to the house#which is soooo nice listen i cried over this car it was a surprise and i criiieeed they said they want me to feel loved and important waaah#my bio-father would never do shit like this its so wild to have a dad that cares about me and looks out for me 🥺🥺#THE TRAUMA HEALING IS A LONG TEDIOUS AND HARD ROAD BUT IT IS REAL BABY#im so happppyyy~~~ i feel so dorky looking at it i keep going outaide to sit in it like thats MINE thats MY BABY#sorry this is dumb im just emotional and i feel so loved and its hard but im learning to trust again and ugh its just really nice yknow 🥺#the car is a metaphor for GROWTH AND LOVE !!!!!!#also never thought i would have a diahatsu ive always been a toyota girlie but i can make an exceptions#also yes there are stickers all over it it was my cool bipolar aunts car prior to me#also also yeah feet i dont care look at em all u like free dog show for the freaks in the back
6 notes
·
View notes