#i love posting shit that's only half-written i think it's really funny and it will happen again

[gingerpeachtea]

🦀🧳✨

AIRPORT CRAB HIIIII AIRPORT CRAB!! six sentences :) once again from my 1am mikecharlie polyverse drabble

Charlie blew out a drifting string of smoke. It hung in the air, [something something words description], and she watched the wind carry it away, watched it dissipate. Met his eyes with a [adj] look over her shoulder. “We’ve just been through a lot of shit, y’know?” She sniffed, and flicked ash on the ground, her eyes following the fading embers down. Mike’s lips twisted.

(make me write!!)

[singukieee]

—my all time favourite bts fics (pt. 3) ᯓᡣ𐭩

consists of my personal favourite bts fics that I've read countless of times. including those from other platforms, such as Wattpad, AO3, and Patreon.

For some works that are cross-posted between tumblr and wp/ao3, I'd only link them to the latters bcs I find it easier to read and navigate the stories on those. but I also tagged all the authors I know are here and linked the rest so you can check their blogs out yourself!

I'll also separate this list into several parts simply because there's too many... So it'd be easier for you guys to navigate!

red means unfinished

blue means finished

🗯️ editor's note

(sorted by alphabetical order)

Merilia by saylilirose

"Mermaids are not real!" That's what you and Namjoon hear everywhere you go. It's funny that you're hidden in plain sight, although perhaps popping a tail in front of strangers wouldn't end well for you. That's what you've come to learn. You've also learned, to hide yourself very, very well. Until- "NO-DON'T JUMP-SHIT!" You and Namjoon are joined by others, not by choice.

🗯️ mermaids and insane drama oooh yes

Moonchild by @yoongiofmine (paid on patreon but so worth it)

Working at a coffee shop that only opened in the late hours of the night was the most exciting thing about your life, really. You never had that many friends, your love life was nonexistent, and you just couldn’t explain the feeling of not belonging that chased you no matter where you tried to find your place. It was when seven very handsome strangers came into your life that weird things started happening around you and within you. Could they be the ones to fill in what’s been missing? Or would getting involved with them and their world put you in danger?

🗯️ aaaah so good!!! so well-written, gahh plott so great, identity crisis (human or...?), werewolf drama.

My Muse by Zennnoe

I felt my lungs suddenly stop and a coldness brush onto my face, I gasped loudly clutching onto my chest. Dropping down onto my knees trying to grasp whatever air in-front of me. But I was at dance practice. So why did it feel like I was breathing underwater? I soon felt the hands of my close friends lift me up and lay me down as I try to takin in as much air as possible, for her. Soon the staff swamp me and I hear them talking about her, my other half. I soon clutched onto my stomach and I shouted loudly in so much pain, pink fluorescent patches bloom onto my skin. Yes they looked pretty. But the reason why they were there was not. As I try to reach out I grab one of my friends hands tightly and request for one thing. "My music. Pass me my music." I beg. This is the only way for me to reach her…to help her. My beloved soulmate.

My Soulmate are IDOLS by tinyeyecat

In a world where soulmates exist and people receive their soul bonds (a red string of fate, body exchange, timer tattoos…etc) when they turn 20… Wet dreams are not the norm for Amber. She should not be haunted by men she doesn't know, let alone by the world-famous boyband, Bangtan. But on the day of her birthday, Amber switches bodies with the idol on stage and finds out that the members of the boyband are her soulmates. All seven of them.

🗯️ this is one wild story... aren't all emi ree's stories so wild tho? but also well-written. (epilogue is on Patreon).

Not My Hybrids by Ghosstwriterss

When Y/n is pressured to volunteer at a hybrid rehabilitation/adoption Center, and asked to house 7 hybrids to help them become comfortable with humans and the idea of adoption, who is she to say no?

🗯️ the kind of story where mc's so freakin nice I don't think she's human. but yea it's all worth it.

One Kiss by DuraWrites

In a world where soulmate exist, where you can only know your soulmate through a dream. Confirm through a kiss and complete the bond through love-making. Han Bora just celebrated her 22nd birthday and not long she started having dreams of her soulmate. Correction. Soulmates. Already being a fan of this popular K-pop group, she immediately knew that her soul is tied to all seven of them. It was a dreadful yet thrilling thought as the realization of being the soulmate to her favourite artists hit her. But it isn't just as easy as it seems. Because she was the only one who had the dreams. So She has to prove to them she's their soulmate. And the only way to confirm that is through ONE KISS. How will an average girl find her way to that untouchable top to prove to the biggest boyband that she's their soulmate? Come along and let's dive into this crazy mess of a journey together.

🗯️ one kiss is all it takes... literally

Out of Time series by Alphathyx

🗯️ so freakin sad wtf but that is why there's an alternate ending. soo good and heart wrenching.

❶ Out of Time

A story about a girl named, Hana who has suffered a chronic condition all her life that would soon take her life one day. But with her final wish, she uses it to see BTS, but the boys decided to have more in store for her. Join Hana, and the members in a fluff filled adventure before time runs out.

❷ Out of Time: Young Forever

The alternate ending for 'Out of Time' and bonus chapters

Parfait by fullspectrumfangirl

Alpha bands are a popular entertainment schtick. Handsome, powerful, talented, they sell the fantasy of availability as much as they sell their music. After all, everyone knows a pack is incomplete if it only contains alphas. Omegas and betas dream of being a part of the balance. Unfortunately, this is more than just marketing. A band needs to function as a pack, but with only alpha members, bickering and infighting are almost unavoidable. Beta managers help, but there is another common tactic that helps the talent maintain equilibrium: house omegas, hired companions who stand in for the missing pieces. BTS is a wildly popular seven-member alpha band. They are known to be particularly kind and humble, but they are still struggling to keep house omegas for their pack. None of the prior candidates have wanted to leave, but one member has protested them all. What is the missing ingredient in their otherwise winning recipe?

🗯️ again, idk what to say but it's good! a really well-written story with great plot.

Peculiar Pack by @daydreamindollie

You’re a successful hybrid writer and psychologist, who takes in seven hybrids one stormy night after finding one of their pack stealing from your garden.

🗯️ cute T.T

Petrichor by @purpleyoonn

You had been working at Bangtan Corporation for almost two years now, and not once have you ever laid eyes on your bosses. That was, until you met them when out with some of your coworkers. Now, you almost wish you hadn’t. Almost.

🗯️ courting... yes please! and again, I love possessive mates.

Plump by koozip

Meeting Namjoon's close friends was something you've been anxious about since meeting him. You wanted them to like you. Starting off with a group chat seemed like the perfect way around your fears. You weren't sure how they'd feel about you in person. So when they fell in love with you and your lovely curves, you were taken by surprise. You soon realize that you're stuck with the seven handsome men for the long run. The chronicles of chubby y/n and her new smitten friends. Based around the group chat named 'chubbybear' that started it all.

🗯️ gosh this one's just warm and sweet, especially for fellow chubby girlies out there!

Rainy Days by Peanut_The_Sugar_Glider

Life had dealt you a rather crappy hand, but you kept on fighting, you kept on existing day by day. On a gloomy day however, you feel as if it all means nothing, as your beloved pet had past away and she always was there to cheer you up and enjoy the gloomy weather, making it less sad and depressing. Be it fate or otherwise, movement catches your attention outside. And your life is never the same after. You never will have to worry about being alone, and you find yourself enjoying the rainy weather.

🗯️ despite the title, this story feels like a warm hug.

Redamancy by strawberheecake

In which Yn met an unknown pack of hybrids living on a land she inherited. Feelings bloomed as the pack helped her weather the storm that is her greedy family.

🗯️ another neat and well-written story <3

Retribution by Babydoll_Blue

The Bangtan Boys were known around campus for being heart breakers, but when they made poor Seul-ki cry, Y/N and Mina decided it was time for retribution. Forming a plan to ruin their images, Y/N sets out to seduce them all.

🗯️ revenge gone wrong... or right? wtf am I typing, just read it guys.

Rose & Thorns by @minniepetals

A lone rose, a little broken, until Jungkook came along and the two of you saved each other, and in doing so, Jungkook showed you a world where he shared with his six other mates.

🗯️ a dramatic and warm story. I'm such a simp for soft but strong MCs like this one.

Safe House by SweetBreadFictions

In a dystopian universe where hybrids exist, the government had turned a blind eye to the mistreatment of hybrids. These persons were used, abused and treated in the most unfair ways. To escape the evil owners, hybrids make their way to the rumored district of freedom called Area 613. To help these refugee hybrids, an underground railroad had been developed by kind people. Being sympathetic to these persons, you run a safe house stop for the hybrids during their journey. As you help these hybrids, seven of them decide that your safe house might be better that any rumored district of freedom.

🗯️ I love when the relationships develop one by one so you got attached to allll of them.

Sanctuary by @softykooky

Some people are lucky enough to be born into a family that loves them. others meet their family in a coffee shop while on the run from the korean ambassador, while they’re holding a man at gunpoint and beating him to a pulp for treason against their syndicate.

🗯️ :")👍

Seven by Worldwidehandsomeyouknow

Life is boring. Same thing, day in and day out. Nothing new or exciting ever happens. I just want something, anything to happen! Well something happens alright. Seven somethings in fact

Sheltered by Gracie30102

What Namjoon thought was trouble turned out to be a blessing as he rescued a wounded kitten who would capture his packmates hearts little by little.

🗯️ s o f t.

Soulmate to You by OT7oramI

When a vaccine leads to unexplained symptoms, the world erupts into panic. What happens when one girl finds out she is soulmates to all seven members of the largest group in the world?

🗯️ another well-written soulmate story! this synopsis doesn't give justice to this freaking good story so just read it please.

Spring Day by @nunchiimagines

Becoming a part time english teacher wasn’t exactly the ideal startup you had hoped for yourself when you first moved to Seoul, South Korea. Luckily, you loved working with children and you were grateful to have found a well paying job with housing included so soon after university. Amongst your class, however, are 5 boys who seem to be constantly ostracized not only by the rest of the students but also by the other teachers and staff members. Becoming attached to you fairly quickly, you’re unintentionally tasked to be their permanent caretaker during their stay at school, even staying past the hours you were needed until they were picked up safely. However, what you didn’t expect was to catch the hearts of their seven older brothers, the leaders of a notorious and well known mafia family in Korea.

PART 1 | PART 2 | PART 4 | NAVI

[witchinatree]

i have posted a LOT about the issues i had with season 4 of TUA but i'm going to say everything i've been thinking right here right now. i cannot get this shit out of my head.

i think a lot of it ties back to the flaws i noticed in season 3, they tried to take on too much and abandoned the previous storylines that were waiting for them (viktor's traumatic relationship with leonard, five's trauma in general, lila's parents dying because of five, DAVE, etc etc) and we were all expecting them to tie it all together in season 4

instead they just.. added more..???? jennifer and abigail were thrown in late season 3 and were just suddenly supposed to be super important to us (they were not.) the subway that takes you to other timelines (objectively cool as fuck, why is this only introduced in the last season of The Timeline Show)

and i'm still really upset that reginald is an alien because it makes no fucking sense. i always assumed he created the mystery 43 babies (why else would he seek them out and already have a plan for them) but the alien route was.. ill-fitting. i think it would've worked better if he fell in love with abigail, who was an alien and created marigold, and then his hubris and curiosity was what unleashed it into the world and doomed the timeline. "sure this mystery chemical destroyed the planet my wife is from but i'm reginald hargreeves so that won't happen to me!" [happens to him] also i wish abigail was not just used as "see! abuser not so bad! abuser have wife! he love wife :]" because. what. and then her weird complaints about reginald in episode 6 that came out of nowhere confused me. they just should've written her entirely different if they were gonna have her at all

AAALSO i hated that they regressed all of the characters back to how they were in season 1 (or worse??). luther was living in the old umbrella academy building because apparently he will never leave it?? after everything?? diego's life was different but he was still doing this weird job shit (discount batman and mail carrier are the same thing) and he was miserable with his loving wife and kids (who ARE you.). allison's husband left her again (what the hell raymond) and she was still the neglectful single mother of claire?? after EVERYTHING I KNOW I ALREADY SAID THAT BUT GOD. klaus actually had something going for him, if only his recovery wasn't made into a joke, and then he relapsed and got kidnapped and was just very.. season 1 klaus.. but with no ghost ben anymore. five.. eugh. he was not season 1 five he was just NotFive. crazy how they had a magnus archives crossover and just brought in NotThem to take five am i right guys. ben's also different because it's not the same ben from season 1 but they just made him really fucking mean. like worse than season 3 because there wasn't that underlying "please i just want to be loved" thing. crypto bro ben was funny as fuck though. and VIKTOR just fucked off by himself after working so hard to be part of the family again. glad he got to transition and become canada's #1 manslut but jesus, just abandoned everything you did to be part of the family huh.

my vision for the ending of TUA would go something like this

ending of season 3, pretty much the same but they all have their powers and reginald's head getting sliced in half did not reveal him to be some alien freak. also at some point abigail would have been introduced. i don't feel like rewriting season 3 too okay i'm cutting corners.

luther finds sloane when he goes back to where the umbrella academy building used to be, but it's now a very lovely apartment that the two of them live in together. they host all of the family gatherings for sentimental and space reasons. i think luther would explore the stripper idea but decide not to follow it because of sloane. sloane would be fine with it but luther would still get worried.

diego and lila live in the same house somewhat nearby. lila's family (they do get to be alive but lila does have to overcome the trauma of losing them while simultaneously getting them back) are their neighbors, it was the compromise they came to because diego wanted their house to be their space but lila wanted her family close. they have three kids who are each loved and names get to be in the fucking show. (looking at you mystery twin. grace and coco (?) didn't really get much attention either). they have a big backyard that the kids all play in together when they're visiting

allison and ray are still together and they have claire (maybe another kid...) they also live somewhat nearby the rest of the umbrella family because i refuse to let them separate. i don't have much to say about them other than RAY DID NOT WALK OUT ON HER.

klaus and dave live in allison and ray's neighborhood. maybe they adopted a kid? maybe they didn't? i think their family would be really cute either way. klaus is still overcoming his addiction and dave supports him through it. it's not made into a joke and actually gives klaus a lot of depth and emotional moments. also just in general dave meeting the rest of the family would be really really sweet

five gets to retire. he lives with viktor in my mind. full circle on viktor being the person who always waited for him and offered him a place to stay after he got home in season 1. five would not actually be getting a retirement pay because he has never had a real job so he's just vik's roommate now. he could have a romance plotline with a woman working at the department store down the street named delores. she looks familiar.

ben lives alone and works at a tech company? honestly i don't know what i would do with him in the pre-plot but it would not be put him in jail?? me personally. i think he would probably move further away than everyone else but stay close enough so he could visit sloane sometimes. he still feels like an outsider but doesn't know how to tell the umbrellas he wants to be their brother now

and viktor lives with sissy harlan and five (previously mentioned). his transition gets to actually be explored (PLEASE.), harlan is in therapy, and sissy is a strong working woman!! again i don't really know what to do with him pre-plot. just know he's the happiest he's ever been!!!

and just in general, a lot of this happiness from all of them comes from their powers and that they can finally be one big happy family together (whether ben likes it or not). setting up the inherent tragedy that comes with perfection

episode 1 opens by showing everything i just explained, the tragedy of getting everything you want or whatever the title was. their powers are still integral to their lives. they're either tied to their careers (luther would probably be like a wrestler or something again, diego could try police work again because i want that to be explored) or other aspects of their existence (allison still finds herself doubting how much of her life is real, klaus' relapses are always caused by his trauma surrounding ghosts, five sometimes space jumps when he wants to be alone [also i think he could feel some sort of shame/guilt because he lives with viktor and can't really contribute much without the commission. not really his fault though because of his insanely fucked timeline], ben uses the squid to carry things or grab things that are far away, and viktor plays the violin to help him remind himself that he is in control of his power now, and he won't end the world again)

the main conflict starts when ben meets a new woman named jennifer and shakes her hand when introducing himself (starting the marigold/durango reaction that builds very slowly throughout the season.) it could be romantic but i think it's just devestating. they're slowly realizing they're losing everything they worked so hard for because of something they can't control

yadda yadda yadda figuring shit out while also having conflicts in their life from the earlier seasons and it culminates in the old umbrella academy building, viktor is the only person who can remove the durango and marigold from ben and jennifer and save the world. he finally gets to be the hero, be the one to stop the end of the world instead of cause it, but he needs to take the marigold from each of the siblings in order to balance the amount of durango jennifer had (no idk why he would let the other like 30 something marigold kids keep theirs i really don't know how to fix that. why would they do this to me)

each of the siblings have to give up part of their lives, part of their identities, and it's hard for them!!! they struggle a lot to agree to do it!!! and it's also harder for them because they don't know if viktor will survive doing this. but he's the only one who can? is his life more important than the existence of everything and everyone? ultimately, they all give up their marigold, and viktor takes all of it and the durango to save everyone. it cancels itself out and stops the cleanse reaction, and i think it would kill viktor (but it doesn't have to). we see that same clip of the 'perfect world' but they get to be in it. they were never the problem. lila and diego play in the park with their kids. allison ray and claire are walking together. klaus and dave are talking on a bench. luther and sloane are carrying a large basket of food. ben and five are helping them set up the picnic. harlan is sitting in the grass with sissy next to him. each of the adults have a small violin tattoo on their wrists. their lives will never be as perfect as they were before, but they can finally just rest and move on. because it was never their fault.

also reginald dies. fuck that guy

[gffa]

Dearest gffa, you are the only person I know whose been reading Batfamily comics. (Though I do read some of the fanfic haha). The destiel meme informed me that Bad Things just happened in the latest comics. Is there a primer to the latest drama? (Everyone seems upset). Are you ok?

Best wishes, your fandom neighbor on Star Wars Street

I assume this is about the Batman #148 leaks? I haven't seen a ton of drama (other than a couple of posts, including the Destiel meme notification that got me to go see what was happening) but if that's it, it's kind of funny, because okay. As far as I've seen (the issue isn't even out yet, so I can't read it until tomorrow, I'm only going on the leaked panels I've seen) what happens in the issue is that Failsafe-- okay, let me back up. In the current Batman run (written by Chip Zdarsky), awhile back Bruce created a super powerful robot that was meant to be activated in the case of him going rogue so that it could take him down, and it's very coldly logical, based on his patterns, so it knows him extremely well and is hard to beat. It's powerful enough that it apparently took out the Justice League awhile back (I haven't read that arc yet, so take that with a grain of salt), which means now that Failsafe has gone rogue in the current Batman series that Zdarsky's writing, Bruce is having a hell of a time fighting it, especially with his "backup personality" Zur-En-Arrh (Bruce is a paranoid shit and I love him the most) is also running amok in his head and he's fighting back against that. Back up further--in late 2023, there was an event called "Gotham War" that was basically, "Bruce has been through a lot of shit lately, so he was out of commission for several months, in that time Selina stepped up in Gotham and started training crooks to be cat burglars instead of rogues' goons, Bruce woke up, thought this was bullshit, despite that crime was down, and they basically had a turf war while Bruce was losing his goddamned mind because of what he'd been through and because Zur-En-Arrh was literally ratting the bars of the cage of his mind, and part of the fallout being that Bruce dosed Jason with a gas that basically made his adrenaline go wild any time he would do anything dangerous, so that he could no longer be in this life of crime or vigilantism, because Jason had killed a lot of people, but Bruce couldn't bear to send him to jail, so this was the only way he could live with taking Jason out of the life they lived". Gotham War was extremely controversial--I had fun with it, because it was BONKERS and I fuckin' love bonkers stuff in the "punching people in the face solves crime" genre, but a lot of people were really angry about how Jason was treated in the arc. Zdarsky co-wrote Gotham War, so this is a continuation of a lot of people's frustration and anger towards how Jason has been treated by DC especially by this author.

There's also a lot of lingering frustration and resentment in fandom because Jason is not always written well or frequently. He doesn't have his own solo book these days, half of what's written about him is written by authors with VASTLY different takes from the other half of the writers out there, and there's a lot of fanon that goes around with Jason's sub-section of fandom where I think it furthers the divide because the fic that's written about Jason delves deep into his character in specific ways that the canon doesn't match and I think it can set expectations for some fans that are just not matched by DC themselves, either because they see Jason differently or because Jason just doesn't have a lot of fans at the company itself, I couldn't say for sure. So, now comes Batman #148 leaks (it's not actually out until tomorrow), where Failsafe kills Jason and Bruce has a dramatic reaction to it, and a lot of people are furious that DC would kill Jason at all, much less with such little fanfare, after how little focus he's gotten over the last several years. The thing is, though, that Jason doesn't stay dead, he's alive again by the end of the issue (I've seen panels from later in the issue) and I'm not sure how many people are reacting just to seeing the posts flying around fandom versus how many people have actually seen the whole context. Because context is slowly rolling out, but people generally aren't soothed by that, given the lead-up to this moment. Basically, years of Jason not getting much focus in the comics + the events of Gotham War have led to a powderkeg of a situation and the contextless leaks (ie, without the panel where Jason's alive again) took a match to the whole thing. And that's what's going on, as far as I know! I personally am having a great time because I was extremely skeptical that they would actually kill Jason without any fanfare and also I like Jason as a hot mess with crunchy relationships with people and that he's done bad things and had bad things done to him/been a victim as well, so all this messy drama in the story has me living for it. (This would have been a very different situation if I'd thought Jason was really dead, but I didn't, so I'm doing fine right now. Also, my Blorbo is Dick Grayson, so I've already been through this wringer and I'm still mad at DiDio for it, so it's Jason-Blorbo's time now.)

[historicallyaccuratecheese]

Well, I guess I’m continuing to make these now! Here’s the next part of my thoughts on every Magnus Archives episode! Now, last time I said that I was planning to write about episodes 21-40 in the next post, but as it turns out, the hyperfixation has set in and my thoughts are a LOT longer (so buckle up if you want to read this), and I also reached the tag limit. So, I’m only going to be covering episodes 21-30 here, and then I’ll write about episodes 31-40, and this 10 episode trend will probably continue for the rest of the posts, but that just means I’ll be able to put them out faster.

Also, unlike my first post, where I wrote all of my thoughts after finishing episode 20, all of these ones were written right after I finished the specific episode I talked about, so my thoughts are a lot more clearly documented. Finally, there’s a link to my masterpost, which will contain all the post’s detailing my thoughts on every episode before and after these ones.

Once again, no spoilers for future episodes please, and for anyone who hasn’t watched up to episode 30, spoilers are under the cut, so I recommend turning away until you’ve caught up. :)

- Episode 21, Freefall 🪂

Statement of Moira Kelly, regarding the disappearance of her son Robert.

WHAT THE FUCK??!! MARTIN??!! DAMN, I guess the horrors did get to him! Well, it’s nice to finally meet him, even if his first line was dropping shit on the ground. Either way, I get the vibe I’m in for a wild ride for this second half. ….What was I talking about? Oh yeah, the actual statement. Anyways this one upset me. Not only did it bring out my fear of heights pretty well, but the portrayal of a grieving mother who can’t comprehend what happened to her son was really heartbreaking. The line “The sky ate him” was kind of comedic at first, especially with Jon’s following reaction (love this guy btw, he’s such a loser), but then it became really horrific when I realized how it was just Moira desperately trying to make sense of the impossible horrors she just witnessed. The plot thread set up with Simon and Harriet Fairchild is also very interesting, and the whole sky thing kind of reminded me of Dominic’s visions in Ep. 4. Overall another one of many fantastic episodes, but HOLY SHIT I’M SCARED.

- Episode 22, Colony 🔦

Statement of Martin Blackwood, archival assistant at the Magnus Institute, London, regarding a close encounter with something he believes to have once been Jane Prentiss. Statement taken direct from subject.

….aaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!! Ok let’s start from the top. Firstly, I’m really happy we finally got to meet Martin in this episode, and he’s great! Honestly he comes off as more dorky than stupid, and just comes off as a real sweetheart, so Jon’s distaste for him (outside of very different personalities), gets more mysterious. Though all things considered, after what he experienced, I don’t think that the bullying is his biggest worry anymore… Alexander J. Newall does a fantastic delivery, as much as I love Jon’s readings, you can really feel how terrified Martin is here (also “Blackwood” is a sick as fuck last name, and I related to him trailing off about spiders…) Outside of Martin himself, we have Jane Prentiss (or what remains of her) and…well, let’s just say that I don’t find the sex worms nearly as funny anymore. Jane and the worms inside her are absolutely terrifying, and while I would say I’m excited to learn more about her, I wouldn’t be complaining if the institute staff never had to deal with her again. Also the text episode made me, if you’ll excuse my language…squirm. Honestly, this might just be my favorite episode so far. The way that the plot threads from previous episodes connected here was extremely satisfying, and needless to say, I’m very excited and horrified to see where the show goes from here.

- Episode 23, Schwartzwald 🇩🇪

Statement of Albrecht von Closen, regarding a discovered tomb near his estate in the Black Forest.

Worst episode ever because Jon didn’t do a German accent, smh. Ok but in all seriousness, I really liked this one! It wasn’t the strongest in terms of complex themes in my opinion, but it had a great vibe, and was still very interesting, entertaining, and decently creepy. Having a “statement” written before the archives was founded is a really cool idea that’s executed perfectly here, and while we didn’t learn that much about Jonah Magnus, I still found it cool to get a first glimpse of the archives’ history. (Also, given the eye imagery that appears both in here and in other episodes, I can’t help but feel like Albrecht’s wording of Jonah having “good eyes” or something like that is a little weird…) And…now that we have the instance of something that isn’t a statement, but is important being in the archives, I absolutely agree with the idea that Gertrude Robinson organized these poorly on purpose, so that Jon would get the knowledge he needed to have. Regardless, this whole episode had the vibes of a classic ghost story, which while not as weird and off-putting as some of the other horror here, was still a nice change of pace overall. The descriptions of The Schwartzwald were really well done and added to the atmosphere, and I just like the fact that we have another historical episode, that’s also set outside of The UK. Also, the way that they played with the time period at the end was amazing, I already had my suspicions due to the eye imagery, but the reveal of Mary Keay (and therefore Gerard Wa- I mean Keay) being a descendant of Albrecht was still really cool. I also do wonder if the Arabic book was eventually found by Jurgen Leitner in the future…eh, food for thought. Lastly, I loved Martin jumping in out of nowhere, it was both funny, and a grim reminder about how fucked the archives supposedly are, yippee!

Wow, these are a lot longer than my previous thoughts. This, my sweet children, is a phenomenon called “brain rot”.

- Episode 24, Strange Music 🪆

Statement of Leanne Denikin, regarding an antique calliope organ she possessed briefly in August 2004.

Jon, honey, are we not going to elaborate on the fact that one of ✨the horrors✨is literally inside the institute? Like, HELLO? That’s not terrifying at all! Anwyays, this episode continues the trend of making me scared of things I’m not initially scared of, yippee! It had great vibes as well, the weird shit in the attic was made to be as creepy as possible. Initially, I didn’t find this one to be too scary, and figured it was going to go in the direction of “music makes people feel kind of weird”. AND THEN JOSHUA GETS KILLED AND TURNED INTO A DOLL HELLO??!!! Like, I know he was kind of a toxic boyfriend, but DAMN, whatever was behind the calliope and the dolls did NOT have to go that far. (Also until the end I thought he might be Joshua Gillepsie, and like, I don’t care how toxic he is, but you do not dump a guy who bested an evil coffin with his freezer.) Outside of that, It was really cool to meet Sasha! I like her voice, and the introduction was quite funny. (Also, even as someone who has lived in England for over two years, and has a family that is 90% British, nothing hurt more that Jon’s “Americans”.) Lastly, I have a theory, which I like to call “Ringmaster? More like cult leader.” Because I’M SORRY, but you cannot convince me that a CIRCUS, called THE CIRCUS OF THE OTHER, which possessed a HAUNTED CALLIOPE ORGAN, is anything but a cult. (Watch me when I’m inevitably wrong lmao.)

I guess now is a better time than any to say that I’m kind of wondering if there’s an in-universe reason for the music in the background? I mean, considering that the whole framing device is Jon recording these statements, I have to wonder if there’s a reason for the noise we hear, especially with the worms in Ep. 22 and the music in Ep. 24.

- Episode 25, Growing Dark ⛪️

Statement of Mark Bilham, regarding events culminating in his visit to Hither Green Chapel.

HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! I LOVE BEING RIGHT!!! I saw the episode title and immediately assumed this would continue the lore of Episode 9, and I WAS SO RIGHT!!! (Also, I now just noticed that the PCOTDH’s symbol is a closed eye, while The Keay Family’s symbol is an open eye…my cult theory thickens…) Anyways, this was another very enjoyable episode! Firstly, even though it’s far from the first piece of media to do so, I though the way they portrayed a cult brainwashing someone when they’re most vulnerable was very well handled and pretty depressing. I also really enjoyed how the episode isn’t the most weird and paranormal on it’s own, but the knowledge of the connections to Ep. 9 makes us know that it DEFINITELY is, even when the characters in the story don’t. The episode was certainly very spooky, the description of the spinach and the dark church definitely got me. (Also my mom came into my room briefly and when she left she accidentally turned off the light and I nearly screamed.) There were also some really interesting plot threads set up here, like the chanting of the northern most human settlement in the world, the mention of “three hundred years waiting”, and I also wonder if “Mr. Pitch” is an alias for ��Detective Rayner.” then…the ending. Holy shit. You know, maybe I DON’T need to know what happened to Gertrude….

Episode 26, A Distortion ☕️

Statement of Sasha James, assistant archivist at the Magnus Institute, London, regarding a series of paranormal sightings. Statement taken direct from subject.

I…what…I don’t even…we are so fucked. Ok, there’s a LOT going on here, but I’ll try my best to formulate my thoughts as clearly as possible. Firstly, this episode easily scared me the most so far, I agree with Jon when he says that the horrors being somewhat friendly is scarier than them being antagonistic, like HOLY SHIT this one was unnerving. But with that out of the way…uh…let’s talk about Sasha! She’s really cool, I like how her character gives us a lot more insight into what working in the archives is like for a fairly regular person (i say this because Jon is weird as fuck and Martin is too nice to be normal, and I mean that as kindly as possible). But…while I don’t necessarily doubt her status as the most level-headed person in the archives, I don’t think that’s saying much. Like, she saw a creepy guy with weird-ass hands who spoke in riddles and knew too much about her and her coworkers, and followed him into a dilapidated building, also she works at the council of ghost stories despite not liking horror. Like, no offense, I’m sure she’s overall an intelligent person, as are most people in the archives, but none of them are beating Joshua Gillepsie anytime soon (yes I’m still thinking about him.) But mentioning the guy with fucked up hands, WHO OR WHAT EVEN WAS THAT??!! I have very little ideas as to how this “Micheal” even connects to the greater picture. I know some people connected him to the mentions of the man with bones in his hands in Episode 8, but that honestly reminds me more of the Leitner in Episode 17. Outside of that, his name is quite interesting, I initially thought that he might be Micheal Crew, but given that Sasha doubts it being his real name, I have my suspicions (although it would give us a connection between this, the words in Episode 8, and The Boneturner’s Tale….hm….) However, I could absolutely see him being Micheal Keay, as he gives off enough ghost vibes to pass as him (and I’m assuming that if Gerard’s dead, Micheal is as well.) Also he is not described as having a Lichtenburg figure on him so…yeah. Lastly, we have the return of THE SEX WORMS. And as happy(?) as I am to see that The Magnus Archives, a podcast developed by RustyQuill.com, that is also licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 4.0 International License, is continuing it’s message of staying abstinent, all things considered, that was absolutely terrifying. I just LOVE the knowledge that the worms are a hive-mind and that Jane might not be the source, I LOVE THAT SO MUCH. In conclusion, I am probably going to sleep with a fire extinguisher tonight, and I am very scared for what the next 14 episodes have in store for me.

Also I guess I’ll mention Tim (the archival assistant, not the dead guy) here because why not. So far I’m getting major bastard energy from people’s descriptions of him, which means I will either love or hate him. Also I found it very funny but also kind of sad that Jon said he only trusts Tim to not prank him in Episode 11, and then he pulled a prank shortly before this statement took place.

- Episode 27, A Sturdy Lock 🔑

Statement of Paul McKenzie, regarding repeated nocturnal intrusions into his home.

Ok, after everything that happened in the last episode, it was nice to get a short and sweet one here. Well, as sweet as an episode of a horror podcast can be. Overall, this one isn’t my favorite, I thought it was a little bit under the standards of creativity for the show as a whole, but that’s obviously not saying much, as it was still pretty damn good in its own right. I think it was definitely very effective with its storytelling, and credit where credit is due, it certainly brought out my fear of weird noises in the middle of the night. And even if I can’t personally resonate with this aspect of it, I do really appreciate how it tackled the idea of mental illness at old age, and while I’d be surprised if the statement wasn’t real, considering where the show seems to be going, it did a very good job at planting seeds of doubt in my mind. But still, it was genuinely pretty crushing how Paul had no proof throughout the entire thing, along with how the cops treated him. It really did make me thing about what would have happened if he hadn’t washed the blood off his hands. It still had a creepy atmosphere, and the reveals at the end were pretty interesting, I hope they show us Marcus’ statement soon enough. Also, the aspect of loneliness in this one did remind me a lot of what happened in Episode 13, so I wonder if there’s some connection there. (Also, I love how I’m 27 episodes in and Jon is STILL roasting Gertrude’s organizational skills.) So while this one isn’t the most interesting for me, I still enjoyed it, and it was nice to have a slightly lighter one after Episode 26. I hope Sasha had a good few days off, she deserves it.

- Episode 28, Skintight 📷

Statement of Melanie King, regarding events at the abandoned Cambridge Military Hospital during filming in January 2015. Statement taken direct from subject.

WHOA THAT WAS SO GOOD!!! Ok, I feel like I should start off with my thoughts on the basic premise, as while those episode is certainly…not the most humorous in its execution, the premise itself kind of is. I don’t know why, but I just thought the idea of there being an in-universe competitor was a really fun concept that was executed perfectly here. It kind of reminds me of something like Hatchetfield and Clivesdale (I don’t know how many people reading this will understand that, but there seems to be overlap between TMA fans and Hatchetfield fans, and also like, shut up, let me indulge in my hyperfixations.) The bickering between Melanie and Jon was great, as was Melanie herself, I’d love to see her again as I think she oddly brought a lot to the world of the series. Although I will say that, while it doesn’t make me like him any less, Jon’s reluctance to buy into statements is a lot more frustrating when there’s another person in the room. I also absolutely love the fact that there’s an in-universe spooky podcast mentioned by name, like, come one, that’s genuinely hilarious. But comedic value aside, this one was definitely pretty creepy. In a similar vain to what Episode 23 was doing, the whole “young people enter creepy abandoned building to film stuff and then get genuinely scared” concept felt evocative of other classic horror stories, and the way they spun it into the context of the show was great. The atmosphere was definitely very creepy as well, as I have mentioned, hospitals creep me the fuck out. And lastly…oh my god, THE CONNECTIONS. So, I’ll start off by saying that all of the skin shit reminded me of what happened in Episode 18 (which I hope is true because I think some connections to other things would make me like that episode more). But that pales in comparison to the fact that we have stuff on THE ANGLERFISH, HOLY FUCK THE ANGLERFISH. I’m SO glad that they didn’t throw it away just because it was in the pilot episode. In retrospect, I think that the story of Episode 1 isn’t quite my favorite. It doesn’t really have to be, as I think the main draw of the episode is getting a first look at the framing device and general vibe of the entire podcast, but the stories didn’t really grab me until Episode 2, which is still one of my favorites. But MAN, this episode really made me appreciate the setup at the beginning so much more, and the knowledge that the people who walked into the alley didn’t necessarily die, meaning that all of those names could potentially come back, is SO exciting to me. In fact, when you consider that Sarah was kind of going through what looked like a possession, I wonder if The Anglerfish is a figure of worship in a cult, if that theory is to be true. (Also I have relatives that live in the same area as Sarah so…maybe I should tell them to watch out for their neighbor lmao.) So yeah, this…this show is just really freaking good.

Note: I have discovered the Leitner rant, and therefore I have achieved true enlightenment.

- Episode 29, Cheating Death ♟️

Statement of Nathaniel Thorp, regarding his own mortality.

I should start off by saying that I love the episode title for this, like, it’s not even metaphorical, the guy literally cheated in a game against death. Well, anyways, the main thing that caught me about the episode was how it absolutely blindsided me. While I was right about the soldier being the same as the statement giver, which I think was supposed to be obvious, everything else in those last six or so minutes left me with a wide-open jaw. (Also, can I just say that I love how poetic this guy just…decided to be? Like, I just love it when the statements really show of personalities with the way they’re written, and it comes with a cool framing device.) Regardless, I initially assumed that it was going in a very traditional line. Nathaniel cheats death, becomes immortal, and regrets it in modern day because he’s lived longer that he really should have. That, combined with the fact that “Death” didn’t seem like the one of the more creative horror monsters in the show so far, had me so prepared to just write this one off as one of my least favorites (once again, not like that’s saying much.) And then the twist comes and HOLY SHIT I WAS WRONG. The idea of there basically being multiple grim reapers at the hands of some unknowable power, who have to gain successors to finally die themselves is absolutely terrifying and extremely clever. I tip my hat to you Rusty Quill, you did a great job at fooling me. Kind of funny considering how this is a story about being punished for your hubris (which seems to be a recurring theme???) I have a few other small thoughts as well. Firstly, I can’t help but shake the feeling that Nathaniel Thorp was an actual revolutionary war soldier, but I can’t find anything online other than the character from this episode. Also, the fact that his fate remains unknown makes me think he’ll show up again, as it seems weird to NOT end the story with confirmation of his death, given the themes. Secondly, a lot of the…less than pleasant imagery here definitely reminded me of Piecemeal and The Boneturner’s Tale. I don’t remember the story inside that Leitner very well, but I might check just in case there’s any parallels between it and this statement. (Update: Not really.) And finally, I was just a little bit intrigued by the fact that we learn no one who was working at the institute in 1972 works there anymore. It’s probably nothing, but given the mysteries surrounding Gertrude’s death, I’m just a little suspicious, both in general, and of Elias because he’s still around. Overall this episode went hard, I’m still kind of stunned by what it pulled off.

Jane Prentiss statement…save me…save me Jane Prentiss statement…

- Episode 30, Killing Floor 🍖

Statement of David Laylow, regarding his time working at an industrial abattoir near Dalton.

You know what, Jon is right, there’s a lot of meat in this show. Not that I’m complaining, I mean, it does fuel my obsession with connecting the dots between statements. Regardless, while this isn’t among my favorite episodes so far, I still had a good time with it. The reason it’s not one of my favorites is purely personal, as I don’t do too well with animal violence. Like, as much as I do really appreciate how viscerally Jonny Sims can describe the statements, I will admit that the opening minutes describing the slaughter house made me more uneasy than the actual horror, and not in a particularly fun way, but it was overall fine. Speaking of the actual horror, that was actually pretty good. The endless hallways lined with doors that lead to precarious situations also kind of tapped into a personal fear of mine, but in a more fun and digestible way. And while the idea of “imagine humans being slaughtered like animals” is something I’ve seen many a time before, it was still much more well executed than many other interpretations of the idea (*cough cough*, peta) and there were also plenty of other interesting themes and ideas, like how the episode touched on the inherent horror of working in a job as gruesome as the killing floor, being enslaved to said job, and the idea that maybe we’re all just walking sacks of meat in the end, and nothing more. As for some other thoughts, I was definitely creeped out by Tom Han, I’m not sure whether or not he’s someone who spreads ✨the horrors✨or someone affected by ✨the horrors✨, and his sudden disappearance was certainly…odd. On top of that, it’s admittedly haunting to know that there’s still creepy stuff going on at the slaughter house, and that this isn’t something that happened to David, and only David. Overall, a pretty good episode, I don’t have much to say about it, but it was a fun time overall.

Tim…save me…save me Tim…

Well, if you’ve made it this far, thank you so much for reading! Genuinely means the world to me when there are people willing to listen to me ramble about my horrible (affectionate) interests lmao. I should have my thoughts on the final episodes of Season 1 out in due time, and while I’m sure it’s obvious, I’m absolutely hooked on this podcast. It absolutely has the potential to become one of my favorite things ever if the overarching plot becomes more involved and this is coming from someone who up until now, wasn’t all that gripped by podcasts. While I’m a little sad that I’m as late to the party as I am, then I remembered “oh yeah, I was in elementary school when this horrifying series came out”, and I’m also hopeful that I’ll be able to be around for The Magnus Protocol while it’s airing (I know it premieres in like a week but still.) Anyways, thanks for reading and hopefully you’ll be around for my thoughts on the next batch :)

[benjineedssleep]

(fanfic) silly things in my 100k+ word wip that i really fucking love

i talk about this fic out of context a lot to avoid spoilers since it's not posted anywhere yet but... i really wanted to share a couple of things that might be a little too in context. anyways! lol-- the list is under the cut. proceed with caution if you plan on reading it when it's done :3

p.s. it's a sambastian fic but has a ton of other fun stuff. there's somethin' for everyone in there. (if you care at all, here's an intro to it.)

as annoying as it is to write, reoccurring items/motifs are so fun. like yes, i can and will be referencing a joke from ten chapters ago. and yes, that character sebastian knew? yeah, well, haley knew her too because they all grew up together and went to the same high school. it's just fun and a way i world build in a space that's already pretty developed.

speaking of the motifs, my favorite has to do with touch; the boundary between something explicitly platonic and romantic. pretty much every character toes the line but there are certain things, like hand holding, that just really take the cake for me. see it's not just hand holding. it's guiding. to go from holding a wrist to a few fingers to a palm and to then intertwine. it's fuckin' fantastic. even more so because it's such a small detail you can miss.

haley and vincent are two of my favorite characters to write. they have very specific voices and mannerisms and trying to keep it consistent and in character is such a fun challenge.

on that note, haley and sebastian are my favorite dynamic to write (other than sambastian obviously lol, the fic is theirs after all). they're both catty and their love-hate relationship is my favorite thing ever. i recently wrote a part where haley comes to him for advice and half the conversation they're arguing/dragging each other for absolutely no reason. and what makes it even funnier is they continue the conversation all the while this is occurring.

sam is full of shitty jokes and even though i only throw them in there a handful of times, i adore how cheesy he is. he just thinks he's so funny and, despite everyone's grumbling, they can't help but agree.

robin and sebastian's relationship is also fantastic. a lot of what i wrote with them is early on and needs to be heavily revised, but generally speaking, they're both flawed characters who fucked up their relationship with each other and being able to explore that in a healthy way makes me cry. it's just so good. everyone needs a robin.

abby is the most omniscient character in the whole story because she's not only friends with sam and sebastian (getting both sides of their stories) but also with haley (the town gossiper). the way the two girls kinda orbit everyone else while having their own shit going on is just a blast to write. they don't exist just to fuel the plot, they're their own characters. but also, watching them lose patience and start forcing their friends together like barbies while playing house is REALLY fucking amusing SDFUIHSDFH

internal battles are just SO juicy. most of sebastian's issues are internal and self inflicted. he's just in his head too much and does dumbass shit to try and cope with whatever he's feeling (that he doesn't want to, even if it isn't inherently bad) at any given moment. the main plot and catalyst for the story's problems is literally him not wanting to accept that having feelings for people is okay!!! he's so stupid!!! i love him!!! (he's also me sometimes... i fear...)

i'm not typically a massive fan of ocs in written fan fiction (i for some reason eat art/comics up though???) but i cannot help myself by throwing in random and irrelevant characters. there are two market-esque things in winter year 1 and all the vendors the characters talk to have names and personalities. all of them were made up on the spot and will (likely) never reappear, but i don't care. they add depth to something otherwise limited to a handful of canon characters. i haven't tried out any expansion mods for sdv but i totally get why people like them so much and write those new npcs into fics. the options increase like... sevenfold XD

speaking of ocs, i basically make irrelevant canon npcs into ocs in this fic. welwick the fortune teller? i made them non-binary and they genuinely have thousands of words dedicated to them and are referenced multiple times throughout the entire fic.

SPEAKING OF QUEER FOLKS-- anyone i add is some flavor of queer. i don't give a single fuck. there's an nblm relationship and there's a trans masc character and there will be many more random inclusions because i said so.

super minor detail that i technically haven't had the opportunity to add yet but background ships? characters who literally don't have audible interaction? i'll be writing that in. haven't decided who's getting blasted with the miku-beam-of-homosexual-pairing yet but i'm leaning toward harvey and elliot. and both of them have their own lines in the fic already. so they're real... (and i love them...)

sebastian opening up as the fic progresses, letting people into his life, letting people love him unconditionally... A U G H-- it's fucking fanTASTIC bro. i already have an idea of the exact way i'm going to end the fic and it has to do with this exact concept and the way it's physically represented in his collection of 'cherished items'. more than just abby and your mama care about you now my love =((( /pos

okay. i think i'm good. i can seriously go on forever just like with my headcanons. i just love writing so much. i LOVE IT SO MUCH-- also, before i go, take a shot every time i said something was fun to do. you'll be drunk as hell by the time you get back down here, trust XDD

[bnnuy-wabbit]

Cunospig -> bnnuywabbit

Name's Lago. I'm 22.

My art tag is #feral art tag

I'm prone to note spamming mutuals! I personally love being note spammed. It's a love language. To me.

If you happened to stumble upon this blog, you Must Know that I'm obsessed with many things like my own OCs as of writing this post!

I'm Brazilian. As in from Brazil. As in Born There and Living There till my eventual demise, possibly. If you also happen to be one of those or adjacent, feel free to hit me up. É nois 🤙

I treat my blog as an open diary sometimes. There'll be cool things about my life and things in excited abou t and things that make me upset and general life shit. I also talk a lot about my little brothers endeavors because i love him and he's my little creature. If this bothers you, i recommend not following. Also this blog contains adult stuff because im an adult, so follow at your own risk and/or pleasure! I think you should be in control of what you use your eyes to look at 👍

More info under readmore!! But only if you feel like it.

Other than the aforementioned, i have Many other interests that Can and WILL show up here, like:

My OCs and worldbuilding

Portal

Half life and hlvrai

Disco Elysium

Stranger Things

Homestuck

Whump stuff

FNAF

Literally whatever show and game im currently watching or playing.

I'm also VERY into music. My favorite genres are 00s pop, industrial metal, heavy metal, classic rock, folk and mpb. I love learning more about music and getting to know new music genres. Feel free to pop some in my inbox!

Random info: I use emojis abd smileys unironically. I just love to pepper my texts with some emotion here and there. I promise there's no sarcasm associated to my emojis and smileys. If i send i smiling smiley i Mean It. I also add !!!! To them if I'm particularly excited. Tone tags are confusing to me, I don't use them.

Regarding The Me: I'm queer and weird about it! My gender is completely not my business, it's up to you to gender me. Also I'm an Artist and creator at heart, so i draw a lot, i like sculpting things with clay and foam, i love doing collages, i like playing my guitar and sometimes i write fucked up things for fun because it's Fun, tho i wouldn't call myself a writer. I'm diagnosed audhd. I'm weird and not in a cutesy way sometimes, but at least I'm funny about it i think!

I'm uhhhh a med student with a background in AG/rural sciences (vetmed + fishing) which ig is kinda funny. The funniest thing about me is I'm an honest to god fishing technician. I have a fucking diploma in fishing. I have no idea how or why, it still baffles me!! I have plenty thoughts on the ag/fishing field as a whole and a bit of experience with Some Things. I've worked in a few labs and written and published a few papers and I've wanted to be a Real Scientist when i grew up since i was a kid :)

I think that's about it.

I'm a bit shy, reverb though nobody believes me when i day it! But please feel free to send an ask asking for my discord if you'd like to chat. My messages are off for nonmutuals because I'm tired of getting spambots. One thing i MUST state upfront if you'd like to talk to me and be friends: i likely have a personality disorder (avpd, extreme anxiety regarding Connecting to People) but I'm working on it! I'm trying to get better at talking about myself and my interests and socializing, so don't blame yourself if our conversations fall flat. Talking and initiating conversations with people is Hard, but I'm alright at keeping conversations going if you tell me about your likes and dislikes or if you wanna do small talk! My cheat sheet is: Talk to me about your favorite weather, your timezone, what you like learning more about, about your country and culture or your favorite types of music and your favorite bands! Tell me about yourself, please!!! I'm told i can be really cool to talk to if we get to know each other, I'm told I'm a very trusting, agreeable and judgementless individual. I like to believe that is true. To be fair, I'm eager to make new friends and learn more about people and we'll bond over something, I'm absolutely sure 🥰.

I have a lot of blogs. Like a LOT. I'm not going to link them all here, but they ARE linked to my main somewhere. Probably. Have fun collecting them all or something. It's way too many.

Updated: 8.nov.24

[icannotreadcursive]

Was tagged by @grownupchangeling, whose image ID text I also borrowed from. Thanks!

Anyway, fandoms I write for: Hazbin Hotel, Brokeback Mountain, The Old Guard, Sailor Moon, Marvel, The Witcher, and a smattering of others.

Now! Talking about my answers on this XD.

I still have an FFN account, I'm ChinamiMorimoto, but I don't really use it anyomre. Whenever I actually write more on my long-on-hiatus Winter Soldier fic, I will be posting that there, cuz that fic predated my Ao3 account and I was cross-posting it once I got that account, I'll continue to cross post it once it comes off hiatus.

I'm Eiiri on Ao3.

Yeah, I write smut now. Cannot fuckin' believe the first smut I posted was not cowboy smut, but the demons ate my brain. (There will be cowboy smut eventually. There will also be Trigun smut; that one's half written.)

I marked the roleplay one with a question mark cuz, like, kinda? Spontaneously, casually (and usually briefly) with buds, sure, but not in any kind of roleplay account way. And I do have one friend I sometimes do pretty extensive rp-writing with but I don't really count that as "online".

So much beta'ing for friends. So much.

Honestly more of my fics go up unbetaed than actually get betaed.

Ho, all my fic is self-indulgent, that's why I'm writing it.

I HAVE left kudos more than once on the same thing! Can only do it once while logged in, but if you log out and use more than one device..........

I clearly write a lot of M/M, but I've written a bit of F/F too.

My brain starts weaving stories about every fandom I get my grubby little racoon hands on, it's just a matter of if I write them down.

I am a research fiend.

People have been drawing things for my Hellish Encounters series of Hazbin fics and I am so incredibly honored 🥺 You can find some of it here and here!

So many unpublished, and let's just not talk about the half-finished ones partially posted and on hiatus.....

There are so many stories I've started on my phone at 3 am cuz that's when the ideas hit lol

Very much depends on what you think counts as "drunk." I effectively never drink to the point of significant intoxication, but writing tipsy? Oh yeah that's happened.

The Measure of a Tit. It's a short, cute, funny little Sailor Moon ficlet and I really think it deserves more love. It was bouncing around in my head for years before I finally sat down and wrote it, and I love how it turned out.

Swear to god I am gonna make money off of writing shit, I just need to get something actually produced or published.

Tagging: @hotcocoaandstripedsweaters @nerdsandthelike @when-did-this-become-difficult @mediumorange @greentealycheejelly @non-un-topo and anybody else!

Blank bingo under the cut

[headcanon-territory]

☆ ~ Part 6 review and rambles - by a person who has part 6 as their first TV series watch -> reasons why because of that one edit in instragram that made it look cool

☆ CHAPTER 1 - Herlock Shomes arc aka Lupin III snooze fest ☆

>Ok to simply start, Part 6 has one of my favorite character designs in the series, I really love work of the Art Director of this Part and 2 of the specials they worked in

-But Part 6 Lupin is too attractive for me that I'm not normal when he comes up sometimes

-On a scale of attractiveness Teal Jacket is up there with Koike Lupin and CGI Lupin

~☆

>Art direction good, Animation was rough on them though

> especially the car scenes girl those are part of this series' core that it's kinda funny - they could have cheesed their way in making it cool by yknow by cutting the fps and do some squashing magic but I dont think budget and time can make up anything for it

>I should watch Part 5 for more Albert and Yata especially Albert because Yata, in comparison to what I said in the movie review post is actually... ok just not as exceptional as Prison of the Past Yata

>Ok to the biggest flaw this part have done - The Sherlock Holmes arc that took half the season

-ive been 2x speeding that whole thing because to simply put: It's almost all talk, the characters are cramped into one scene standing so awkwardly, NERFED ZENIGATA

-they should have some time to flex out the thing with Lily and Lupin because it feels so off that she immediatly knew that Lupin didn't kill her father with ease. Girl let the mystery be a mystery like how did she easily move on when that girl is trauamatized by his mere presence the first time she saw him

>And Sherlock and Lupin immediatly resolved their conflict with eachother when Sherlock disguised himself as Zenigata despite how they advertised part 6 as Lupin vs Sherlock

>SERIOUSLY ONE EPISODE WITH THEM INSIDE A LITTLE RESTAURANT WITH CRIMINALS?? THE TALKING TOOK HALF THE EPISODE IN ONE SETTING

>The Angel Fossil episode was written by Mamoru Oshii right?? Man nice to know he got a chance to show off a piece of his cancelled idea back then

-but instead of The little girl actually being an angel from the original pitch it's that blonde dude from the beginning actually being The Archangel, Michael.

-its an interesting plot but sadly was boring

-Do like that Heaven is canon to Lupin

>The time period episodes are the ones I only enjoyed along with the episode with a treasure hunter Grandma - Sad that they were kinda fillers and could have been used for more stuff with Sherlock

>GOT YURI BAITED FUCK

>God I don't think the production crew was enjoying the first half the moment theyre done with that and immediatly up with some Lupgang shenanigans felt like they can stretch their legs again

>I'm not a Sherlock Holmes fan but the closest thing that I watched related to this series is The Great Mouse Detective and I'm telling you TMS, you guys fumbled such a concept about Lupin III against Sherlock Holmes

>the story was almost all talk, they explained that shit to you with no proper buildup I was 2x speeding this shit in one day before school starts

>"Pops is not a badass" TMS count your days

~ CHAPTER 2: The Tomoe Arc ~ Mommy issues fuckfest ~

>Now Tomoe arc is the good shit and I'm so mad that the Lupin vs Sherlock thing was the thing that advertised Part 6 primarily

>infact all of my screenshots from Part 6 is from this half of the series

>Ok we have the Lupin fangirl episode, a Fanfiction episode, the episode with the fashion designer and Goemon -- THOSE ARE MY FAVORITES - AND THEY ARE ALL CONNECTED TO THE ARC THEY WERENT FILLERS??

>Me rn

>She got most of them from Pinterest boards

>I would have those photos as my pfp btw

>I like sweet man Lupin alot that's why I refuse to watch the more harsher lupin media because sweet lupin is such a comfort character

>I'm sorry Part 6, that whole monologue of Lupin in the trailer going "I'm a villain, I do bad stuff" goes nowhere in this series because Teal Jacket Lupin acts specifically like Cagliostro Lupin especially when he's with Mattea

>also Mattea kinda deconstructs the trope of the innocent girl character that we always have in the movies especially how Lupin treats her

-man she is fucked up but sad they didn't show her story more clearly

>Actually all the "Dangerous Women" that appeared each episode also deconstucts the whole thing with the NPC girls from the movies existing there for Lupin to solve their problems with how all of them are containing pieces of a puzzle that Lupin has to solve for his own problems - only for that problem to escalate

>The episodes that distances itself from the plot were fun that I didn't mind

>I'm gonna peg you Lupin

>I'm so horny for Teal Jacket Lupin save my soul

>Stupid snork minimi outfits

>Also the fact they even explained why the Lupgang are shown cooking dinner and have turns is because of Poker

-isnt that the most (unconvetional) marriage thing ever

>Even the 2nd half dosent Yuri Bait you this immediatly is superior than whatever the first half tried to offer

>Ok now the Tomoe arc has some unavoidable flaws, of course the ending and the reveal was lackluster and turns out that Tomoe was just chilling somewhere but hey what else can they do

>But the 2 episodes before the ending was wow..

>slowly and surely we are trying to figure out the nature of Tomoe through all the perspective of the girls and only in Episode 22, we finally got a peak of what Tomoe is capable of

>and how fucked up she is - Tomoe is doing all of that just to get Lupin back??

[TW:S/A AND SUICIDE MENTION]

-She has to fuck up lives of girls especially with Mattea and Mariel like girl?? You are manipulating a girl that she loves the guy that raped her???? And even got another girl in the scene to shoot the men Mariel interacted with and shoot herself after

>Wow how everything is set up and all comes together is great. sad that they all end up standing there in the last confrontation

>Also the surreal parts and fucked up lupin is what I came for holy shit look at that

>Tomoe's plan can't work dawg has his gang on the back of his mind

-Also the cage symbolism

-i really fuck with these scenes

>tomoe those cards aren't meant for you and Lupin that's meant to represent The Lupgang and their poker nights in order to see who's cooking dinner

>Fujiko's symbol item was a lipstick?? but what else can represent Fujiko

>Should have some Zenigata in there because of them being in eachother's subconcious

>Also fucked up Lupin shots goes so hard

>I should watch Mamo I need to dissect the lupins

>I absolutely love Tony Oliver's performance I was interested on how hes gonna work this past episodes out especially that this cast started with this series on crack

>The ending was saved by the conclusion being Polycule love wins

>and the lupgang being important to Lupin kinda shows too during the episodes with the ladies and how they are also connected to some of them

>seriously hold up

-You woke up from a hypnotist's trance because of your "companions"

- Your 'partner' shoves a cigarette into your mouth that was from his MOUTH

-said that they have dinner duties when one of them lose to poker

>Yea Fujiko you simply said that one episode regarding the lupgang, "I wouldn't call them exactly friends"

Yea because THEIR YOUR BOYFRINEDS!!!! YOUR STUPISF BOYFRIENDS!!!1!‼️‼️

>also the series after this was Lupin: Zero and weirdly never shows Lupin's mom but what they show is that Grandpa Lup and Dad Lup are also terrible parents so therefore: Lupin is the result of unproper care when he was a kid, genetics by horrible people and his only loving figure was a creepy woman that manipulated him

~~~~ END - What could've been & Zenigata ~~~~

How everything was set up in the tomoe arc and how that part of of the season was enjoyable enough I do wish They executed it better because alot of ideas had so much potential

Especially some scenes in the middle of the sherlock Holmes part

Like Zeni telling Yata to leave because the case is not safe for him since he knows the lengths Lupin can go and plus Sherlock Holmes but Yata refuses as he won't leave his teacher. Cool right?? And then got fucked over with the lack of Zenigata just for Sherlock to shine.

The overwhelming lack of Zenigata was the biggest flaw this part done even for the 2nd half. The writers don't wanna handle him that they put him in fucking jail for some Yata screentime. I love Yata but Yata content in exchange for Zenigata's??

And Zenigata was the guy that found out Tomoe's hiding spot for the audience to know but he came there last minute

And even they put the usual lupgang shenanigans in the last second

But in the end: Part 6 was saved in the second half but was still overshadowed by the very very undercooked first half that would have worked If the production team even tried

and The cast being so enjoyable kept me going but it really shows that without them I wouldn't have watched anything from the part at all..

~ ~ ~ ~

Sivhghgh,; you can even watch the 2nd half without the need of watching the 1st - It's fun and fun angst

[thousand-sunnies]

i think i would go insane for literally any of the fics u mentioned in the tags of that post??? SEQUEL TO THE BENEFITS OF DRINKING WITH STRANGERS???????? (i read that fic twice in a row the first time) i would love to see the interplay between sanji's ideals/hangups and shimotsuki "i take no bullshit" kuina. sanji offering himself up in the most literal sense to feed someone else. listen the cannabalism as an act of service. help im losing my mind. also i can only imagine the degree of "????????" going through ace's mind every step of the way through a lesson in changing the world. dude im going to be thinking about this Forever. that's not even half of what you've got going through my brain

OH DUDE THIS IS SO NICE OF YOU DHEJDKEKJD I WILL BE USING THIS AS MOTIVATION

benefits is def one of my favourite things i’ve ever written (i LOVE cora SO MUCH) so i really want to write that one! i’m at the very end of the dressrosa arc in the anime by now so im just looking forward to the sengoku scene, because i want to like get the vibes before i write his and rosi’s reunion yknow

the sanji and kuina thing oh my god i have that fic half written, but then i went insane about marineford and temporarily lost the drive, but i still maintain that the concept of it would be SO FUN to explore. kuina and sanji just fundamentally Can’t Get Along with how sanji is in canon, and zoro is in the middle of that particular clash…

CANNIBALISM AS AN ACT OF SERVICE OH MY GOD……. you know. vampire stuff is so normalised in our storytelling that i do not instinctively consider it cannibalism. but holy shit you’re right it fucking is and oh my god hold on there’s something about zeff here- AHEM point is cannibalism as an act of service is always a beloved trope i need to think about this more.

and yes it’s SO funny to imagine how confused ace is throughout a lesson in changing the world, i am Really excited to write that one. there’s a lot of stuff from his pov that the marines wouldn’t know about, like the whole luffy and the prisoners on a warship thing, but especially the thought process he’s going through in the time leading up to his execution and up on the platform is SOOO interesting to think about, so im excited :D

ANYWAY OH MY GOD THANK YOU SO MUCH AND IF YOU THINK OF ANYTHING ELSE PLEASE LET ME KNOW because i always want to yell about my ideas or other people’s ideas!!!!

[grishaverse-chaos]

The Darkling

why I like them: could have been SO GOOD in theory okay? I will never shut up about this because "character who everyone thinks is evil is actually just the victim of a smear campaign and some really bigoted propaganda" is SUCH a good character concept and I wish darkling fans were right about him because it would be so fucking cool and aesthetic

why I don't: he uh. he isn't that. he could have been so fucking iconic and instead he was just a vicious murderer. who grooms teenage girls.

favourite episode/scene: LOVE the bit where alina stabs his hand in s1e8. tbf that's more of a fav alina moment than anything else lmao, let me think... okay fr I love the "fine. make me your villain" scene bc it just really showcases who he is as a character and how he sees himself (hint: those two things are not the same)

favourite season/movie: imo he's better written in s1 of the show than in s2, idk though. and I do love his story in the kos duology lmao

favourite line: that one bit in rule of wolves where he says "everything I have done has been for ravka" because it's so clearly Not True and yet.... he clearly thinks it is.... so where does intent stop and impact begin...... it's deep okay

favourite outfit: purely for shits and giggles I'm going to say his black kefta in s2 where there's bits of gold bc I loveeee people being haunted by those they've wronged and I think alina haunting him really fits into that theme

otp: no thank you! in all honesty he prob could have been Fixed™ if he'd had a genuine relationship at an earlier age but he didn't so I refuse to inflict him on any other character. darkolai is interesting to consider though bc I feel like the ways they see themselves clash so heavily.... it's about self image and it's about villainy and law and justice and power and and and. they would Not be a good relationship but I think they should interact more for the Narrative

brotp: his sister ulla! they'd have such a fun sibling dynamic lmao I think it'd be sweet

headcanon: tbh I don't tend to think about him much beyond the big narrative stuff so I'm struggling to think of something that fits the genre of "headcanon".... but let's humanise him a little! I bet he reads really literary fiction and gets ever-so-slightly pretentious about it lmao

unpopular opinion: is it unpopular to say that despite his original good intentions he's a bit of a dickhead and not as smart as he thinks he is? in some corners of the fandom it totally is but idk

a wish: at this point there's not much more that could be done with his character beyond what's already been set up (him being mercy killed so he's not suffering in the thorn wood for all eternity) so I'm going to say that I hope his stans get better reading comprehension bc dear GOD some of the takes I see (posted in the alina tag btw I'm not deliberately seeking them out) are absolutely horrendous. is that too salty? perhaps. idc though it's my blog and darkling stans are free to block me if they don't like my takes

an oh-god-please-don't-ever-happen: I swear if he goes NEAR alina genya or zoya again I will reach through the fourth wall to kill him myself. only half joking btw I'd be so pissed. imo they've all had the closure they need narratively and for him to seek them out again would be a dick move of the highest degree

5 words to best describe them: used to have good intentions. that might be cheating but idk if I can pick 5 random adjectives lmao

my nickname for them: I call him darkles sometimes (bc it's funny and also I think it'd piss him off if people called him that in-universe) also a lot of less positive nicknames ("that prick", "shithead" etc) but idk if that counts

[marybeatriceofmodena]

What was that crazy music video type thing you included on that post about ALW being an ass to Patti Lupone? I have never seen that before and I am both intrigued and horrified. I only recently got into Phantom, and all this craziness is just delighting me. 😂

For context, this is the video referred to in this ask:

This was a promo video done in 1985 (I think), to promote Phantom. Those are the original lyrics by Richard Stilgoe, which he wrote before Charles Hart was involved. You'll recognize a few here and there, but a lot of them are... weird, to say the least (weird enough for Cameron "Satan" Mackintosh to tell ALW to either find someone to help out Stilgoe, either outright fire him, or else he wouldn't produce Phantom anymore. And given it was proving to be a VERY costly show to make, even ALW knew losing CamMack was a no-no).

The staging is also different, because Trevor Nunn was the director at this point. And that's another funny (HA) story: ALW and Cameron Mackintosh had initially got Hal Prince to direct. And for those of you who don't know, Hal Prince is basically to musicals what Steven Spielberg is to cinema. He directed some of the most successful musicals of the latter half of the 20th century: Evita, Sweeney Todd, Fiddler on the Roof, West Side Story, Cabaret, Company... and that's the list of musicals I know even the uninitiated will recognize. So one day, on a whim, ALW decided to fire Hal Prince, which went about as well as you might expect: ALW chickened out of the dinner where he and CamMack were supposed to break the news to him, which led to CamMack having to sheepishly break the news to Hal Prince, who stormed out furious (AS HE SHOULD). Again, imagine yourself firing Steven Spielberg from making Saving Private Ryan and replacing him with, I dunno, the Russo brothers because The Avengers made a shit ton of money.

Why? My guess is that Hal Prince had the balls to tell ALW to stick it whenever he'd bring bad ideas on the table, so ALW basically decided to replace Hal Prince with the director for one of his previous musicals, Trevor Nunn (who is a decent director, mind you, making the comparison to the Russo brothers a little harsh).

Which musical was it, mind you? CATS.

IT ALWAYS COMES BACK TO CATS.

And Steve Harley? He was a rock singer who got picked up along the way because they urgently needed someone to play the Phantom in the music video, and full offense but he's a worse singer than Gerald Butler in my opinion, and at least the latter could actually act. ALW realized that they needed someone else, and he basically smuggled the score to a comedic actor called Michael Crawford, who had some prior experience singing in musicals (he's in the film adaptations of A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum and Hello Dolly, if you're interested), but he wasn't exactly the guy you'd think of for the Phantom? Thankfully, he proved everyone who might have doubted him wrong, and amazingly at that, but he was a gamble at the time nonetheless.

And as you may guess, the music video was kind of poorly received, and Trevor Nunn worked on a little musical called Les Misérables, which got piss poor reviews and ALW was at the head of them (CLASS ACT, THAT FELLOW). But the uneducated, unwashed plebs loved it so I guess that's the reason why it's still playing today, and not because it's one of the most beautiful scores ever written for musical theatre, summing up a 1,000 book perfectly and conveying emotions that could make angels cry, nah. /s Anyway, that led to ALW firing Trevor Nunn, and begging Hal Prince to come back, and he agreed - which really goes to show how gracious he is because I would have laughed in ALW's face.

And what happened to Steve Harley, you may ask? He found out with a call from CamMack that he was fired, with no explanation whatsoever, and it was only later that he found out Michael Crawford had replaced him. I mean, was it for the best? Yeah. Do I still feel kind of bad for Steve Harley? Yeah.

So yeah, thank your lucky stars Hal Prince, Charles Hart and Michael Crawford agreed to be in this. I'd also add Maria Bjornson, but I really wonder now how she got involved in the first place because if that came from ALW, that might be the single best decision he ever made in his entire life. But I don't have any trust in him whatsoever to pull that off lmao

[bromcommie]

🤡 ✅ for the writer asks!

Hi hii, thanks for the ask! :) ✅ What's something that appears in your fics over and over and over again, even if you don't mean to?

Hm. I feel like I haven't posted enough writing for this to be nearly as relevant as it should lol, but: dream sequences, for sure. Humor, sometimes, even if I’m writing something heavy. And I feel like I tend to come back to mythology a lot. Or maybe not mythology specifically so much as storytelling done within the confines of the story in general? Like as thinly veiled parallels for the characters and what they're going through, sure, but also maybe even more so I find interesting just how different characters might tell, or interpret, different stories. Or what the stories they choose to tell or pay attention to are and why - about their own life or those that stick with them. The stories they tell themselves vs. others. It's also kind of an exposition crutch sometimes, so I've been trying to tone it down or reshape it in certain instances, but yeah.

🤡 What's a line, scene, or exchange you've written that made you laugh?

This is an unfinished scene that really doesn’t contain any kind of serious characterization nor historical accuracy. But consider: it's funny to me personally. So who cares. Absolute crack below the cut if you’re interested:

“I am going,” Barnes is hollering from somewhere when Gabe jolts back into consciousness with his face a mere foot from the crackling fire, sweaty and confused, “to kick the shit out of you, Rogers! I’m gonna—“ the rest of the threat gets abruptly cut off when he hits the ground with a heavy thud, all the air knocked out of him. Gabe blinks.

There's gotta be a nicer word for the way Rogers grins with his knees locked around Barnes’ torso, he thinks, other than feral.

“Yeah? Lemme see you follow it through, motherfucker. Lemme see you try.”

Gabe scans their little circle: all of them still battered or bored or battling a variety of illness, and all of them distinctly disinterested in the chaos happening not fifteen feet away.

Whatever the ruckus is, an emergency it ain’t. He stretches with a soul-deep yawn, cocking his head in the direction of the noise. “What’s all that for?”

“Maman et papa se disputent,” Dernier points out flatly from his place across from him, frowning down at the stack of cards precariously towering by Morita’s knee. With a flick of a wrist he throws a card out from his noticeably smaller deck and tuts when Morita immediately trumps it and swipes both cards off the damp log-turned-table. “Ah, putain.”

“Yeah no shit, I can see that. What about?”

Dernier shrugs. “Who se fuck knows. Se mistress?”

Morita lets out an undignified giggle. Gabe squints at the sweaty back of his neck, then down at the conspicuously unlabeled, conspicuously empty bottle by his feet.

“Are y’all drunk?” He glances at the blurry mess of limbs tumbling in the dark. “Are they drunk?”

“Who can tell at this point.”

Gabe watches the two indiscernible shapes in the flickering light that reaches further into the grassy field. There also has to be a better phrase for the mud-covered state they’re both in other than pigs in a pen, but it’s escaping him at the moment.

“What happened to them?”

“Sarge went out to check that house we saw on the way and get firewood. Steve went after him,” Dugan elaborates with a resigned expression, his words running together a little. “Came back looking like two prissy cats the flood just spat out. Something about a mudslide and whose fault it was.” He reaches behind him to pull out a miraculously still only half-empty bottle and tip it his way. “Rogers found us some French brandy, though. It’s shit, of course, but that was awfully nice of him.”

Gabe sits up to accept the bottle, plucking a stray twig out of his hair with a grimace along the way. “Where’d he get that?”

Dugan shrugs. “From a Frenchman, I imagine.”

“All very lovely, except then I believe there was a, uh—” Falsworth jumps in from where he’s propped up on what's left of a nearby fence, nursing his half-empty pipe and an even emptier expression. “Disagreement, if you will, over—“

“Gorizia," Dugan and Morita chorus in unison. Dugan trails off into a mumbled sing-song that Gabe’s pretty sure doesn’t contain any actual words, nor much mention of Gorizia itself.

"Gorizia, yes, and the bullshit with the—“

Gabe groans. "The goddamn barn? Still?"

"Yep. Cap's not letting that one go anytime soon.”

“Oh, and Rogers being a wiseass to Philips when he wanted to bench him last week, don’t forget that," Morita croaks, voice rusted over with the cold but otherwise relaxed. Dernier curses under his breath when his last card lands and digs into his pocket with an expression of a man at his utmost limit. "Or getting his fool ass shot in the first place. One of those."

“—Rogers’ fool arse, yes yes, that too,” Falsworth continues, “which, as you can imagine, didn’t take too kindly to the, uh, constructive criticism. Then Barnes called him an unreasonable fuck so he,” he points with the pipe at where Rogers has Barnes in a headlock, “naturally, brought up something from oh, ten years ago? Ten years ago. That’s about when Barnes tried to tackle him, by the way. And then they started shouting about someone called John — Jimmy—“ He turns to Morita with a series of sluggish finger snaps.

"Jackie Van Wijk," Morita provides helpfully, plucking the stubby cigarette out of Dernier's grudging hand with little sympathy and sticking it behind his ear. "How are you so bad at this? You ran a gambling hall."

"Yes, for poker." Dernier downs the bottom of his cup and grimaces with distaste. "Chemin de fer. Not — children games."

"Jackie Van Wijk, that's right," Falsworth finishes. "And somebody else’s sister who might or might not have been a prostitute, that part’s unclear. I think that about brings us up to now.”

"Are you—" Gabe tries, and fails. "I can't tell if you're fucking with me. How long was I asleep?"

“Oh, about 45 minutes. And you forgot the thing with the coppers,” Dugan mutters over his cup, checking his watch like he's bored out of his skull and has somewhere, anywhere else to be. “And the three dollars.”

“Ah, yes. Sarge owes Rogers three dollars.” Falsworth observes them quizzically for a moment, chewing on the pipe. “Or the other way around, I can’t be too sure.”

“She was a hooker, idiot!” Bucky’s voice carries over again as he uselessly tries to pry Rogers’ hand away from where it’s digging into the side of his face. Gabe can’t tell if he’s laughing or if he’s choked on enough mud by now that it’s permanently affected his speech. “What were you gonna —“

“So what, huh? It was Sands Street, so fucking what, everyone’s a hooker on Sands — I had two more drinks, I coulda been a hooker myself —“

“Are you hearing yourself? Do you ever — stay still, you fuckin’ — do you ever hear the words that come out of your mouth?”

"Y'know," Dugan muses, "if I'd wanted to hear alley cats going at each other all hours of the night, I woulda just stayed in Boston."

"Shut the fuck up, like we don't all know you got the draft."

“Gossip," Dugan protests. “Downright slander.” He whacks Morita's shoulder with probably more force than is strictly necessary. "Hey. Gimme a puff."

"Blow me, Aloysius." It comes out in four parts, vowels dragged out kicking and screaming: Ay-low-see-yus.

Absently, Gabe wonders how much of it is the actual brandy and how much might be a concussion from this morning.

"Sure I will, if you gimme a puff."

Somewhere in the distance, Rogers swears loudly. Barnes cackles.

Gabe stares at them. It really is like being back home, in a way: two of his younger brothers making an awful ruckus first thing in the morning and waking the whole house up over the grand total of jack shit, seemingly hellbent on inflicting as much damage to each other and the surrounding landscape without anyone actually ending up in the hospital. Usually, Gabe’d be the designated first responder in breaking it up, more often than not because he was the only one actually willing to risk getting between them physically. It’d earned him a bump on the head and the grousing nickname “St. Gabriel” more than once.

Jesus, he’s homesick.

He looks back to Falsworth. “So, what, it got so bad they fighting over a girl now?”

“No,” Morita sighs with all the gravity of the long-suffering, voice raising in volume and cracking a little as he turns to look at them over his shoulder. “They’re fighting because they’re two five-year-old fucking morons who are gonna land us in so much shit we’ll be wishing for goddamn latrine duty. Hey,” he shouts over the noise when they both completely ignore him, “Hey! Abbott and Costello — with all due respect, sirs, shut the fuck up.”

“Should we…do something?”

“Hey, you hear that? War’s over! We all take turns pissing on Hitler’s ball-less corpse and then they ship us back!” It falls on deaf ears. Morita throws his hands up. “See? Be my fucking guest.”

“How long before they tire themselves out, d’you think?” Falsworth muses.

“I dunno,” Dugan says with resignation. “Cap is still pretty keyed up from today and I think Barnes runs on pure spite alone at this point, so. An hour? Two?”

They watch the graceless grappling slow for a hopeful moment before Rogers mutters something unflattering about Barnes’ mother and Barnes snorts like an enraged bull, throwing him off.

Morita laughs, the sound quickly derailing into a rattling cough. “That man got a congressional medal last month. Stroke of tactical genius, they said.”

“Yes well apparently out of the two of them, Barnes used to be the voice of reason. See how much that tells you,” Falsworth comments. Dugan’s eyes bug a little.

“Reasonable? Barnes? Sergeant I’m gonna mouth off to the guy with the big stick until he decides to crack a rib or two Barnes? That one?”

“I never said it was a good assessment,” Falsworth replies sedately as the man in question finally gets the upper hand and sends Rogers toppling headfirst into the muck. “It is quite possible, of course, that they have both just lost their damn minds.”

A sage nod ripples through the rest of them. In all honesty, it has been that kind of week. Gabe would be buzzing hard himself if he weren’t so goddamn tired he could feel every single one of his bones rattling around in his body like dice in a tin cup.

“That’s great,” Morita drawls around his smoke. “That’s just dandy. I die dropping into Holland next week, I want my affairs dealt with well, you hear me? I want my tombstone to read: I died for my fellow man, and because my fellow man and CO lost their — Dugan, I swear to Christ, you try to take it one more time I’m putting it out in your ear — lost their marbles at the worst possible time. Over Jackie Van fucking Whoever, no less.” He nods grimly at the clearing. “And then I want those two assholes to pay for the arrangements.”

“We will do our best, mon ami,” Dernier says, passing him the reshuffled deck with a sympathetic hand like an olive branch. “But we will probably also be dead.”

[spopsalt]

https://www.tumblr.com/zhanael/737323861598748672

This person missed the point of the criticisms SPOP has been receiving completely. I haven’t seen one person complain that the world was saved with the power of friendship bc it WASN’T. It was saved by a poorly written rushed abusive romance. In fact, the critics actually wanted to see Adora’s friendships save the day instead of her awful romance with Catra since the show is called She-Ra and the Princesses of Power, despite the princesses barely getting a role. And if there HAD to be a romance, it could’ve been with Glimmer, which would’ve made more narrative sense and sent a better message to kids.

Next, I’m not sure why OP described SPOP as a show with a “pastel color palette about friendship and love and unity” as if these things detract from the bad writing, plus these themes weren’t even handled well. I have no issue with Catra being redeemed and I liked her in seasons 3 and 4. That’s not why the show is being accused of abuse apologism and this isn’t comparable to when Sugar was accused of being a nazi apologist over the SU finale. SPOP was rushed as well (I’m not sure if it got canceled like SU) but Catra’s redemption either should’ve started sooner or the romance should’ve been ditched. SU at least had a much better writing, representation, and messages for kids. It’s funny since imo SU and SPOP are not two sides of the same coin as OP claims. If OP wants shows that are ACTUALLY comparable to SU with “pastel colors, nuanced yet positive and relatable messages about love, fun for kids,” then they should watch MLP and Amphibia instead. Also I haven’t seen one SPOP critic who’s “appalled by anything that is remotely challenging to toxic masculinity” so that’s a load of BS. As for the remaining claims, those may pertain to the SU critics for all I know, but I have yet to see any SPOP critics express such sentiments or behave in such a way. The “hate blogs” for SPOP are really just critical blogs like yours that make valid points rather than “a shit ton of bad faith misinterpretations” and aren’t “tearing [the show] to shreds,” plus the only harassment I’ve seen towards teens over a kid’s show has been from SPOP fans themselves.

This post also included a bunch of nonsense in the tags which I can no longer see since OP recently deactivated their account (in fact the only reason I’m able to share a link to the post is bc someone reblogged it), but they contained more misinterpretations of the criticisms along with slander towards the critics. I’m so sick of SPOP fans continuing to have no critical thinking skills while blindly defending the show and demonizing anyone who dares criticize it. It’s pathetic.

Thanks for the ask! Yeah, the show was saved because of a rushed abusive relationship. The thing is, I wouldn't be half as mad if it wasn't directed towards kids. I don't believe it's intentional, but kids are getting the thought that the way Catra treated Adora is ok because she loved her. Basically the "He bullies you because he likes you!" thing. Instead of actually considering if they have a valid point, they just assume that the critical blogs are just angry homophobic white straight men when a lot of the blogs are queer women like me. Also, yes a pastel color palette makes up for us having to watch a rushed toxic relationship in season 5. It's like spop stans don't realize that their perfect little show can have flaws and anyone who calls them out are homophobic racist. Also from my experience, nobody said the creator romantizes abuse, they are complaining that the show itself does whether it realizes it or not. This show is being marketed to kids and kids will believe that this is ok. That's probably my biggest gripe with the show.

[maleficore]

I don’t even go here but your replies to deepdragons were so needlessly hostile.

“If you found it so disrespectful then why didn’t you block me?” This is childish and hypocritical. If you found their take so bad, why did you go out of your way to go to their blog, find the post, and then argue with them? Why didn’t YOU block them first so you wouldn’t have to see their takes? Why do people need to block you, to actively prevent you from interacting with them entirely, for you to not be rude to them?

People will have shitty takes and you will not agree with every post you see — that’s the nature of fandom. You can’t control how other people post or think and that’s annoying, I get it, but YOU can control how you interact with others. The way you were speaking to that person was so needlessly rude and hostile. Is that how you speak to people in real life? I’m so curious as to what your goal was in talking to them like that. Surely it wasn’t to convince any one of anything. Who would want to agree with someone being so dickish and annoying about something as inconsequential as the politics of elven aging? So, what was all of that for? Did that make you happy or have you just riled yourself up? Do you feel like you accomplished something by speaking to someone like that?

I really hate when people tear others apart for being wrong about fandom things. If you were wrong about something, do you think you would appreciate someone talking to you in the way you spoke to deepdragons? Or would you rather they approach you with respect and understanding? Golden rule and all that, yeah?

You did not have to seek them out and you did not have to engage with them. Next time, either speak to others with respect or just make your own goddamn post. Not everything needs to be a debate.

I also find it funny how you were coming at them for not being faithful for the lore or whatever and then, when someone with more textual evidence than you rebutted your statements and called for you to back up your claims, you were like “I can’t be expected to cite all of my claims like an academic paper!!” Fucking lol. The onus of proof lies only with the people you disagree with, huh?

Have you seen the original post? I'm guessing not because then you'd know that my reply pretty much mirrored the exact condescending tone used by the OP. I also didn't "go out of my way" to do anything. I've said so before and I'll repeat it again: I got an error while reblogging the OG post, went to check the person's blog for what's up with that and the first thing I saw was them calling people stupid for pointing out that They're Not Correct. I already had the post written at that point and I simply copied it from one tab to another. This is the internet, you post something publicly people can and will interact with it unless you stop them. I didn't block the OP because at the time I did not give a shit if they interacted with me or not, I was just setting straight misinfo I see regurgitated over and over again to the point I'm sick of it. Because of the attitude they displayed I was actually fully expecting to get blocked straight away myself.

I'm not actually a dick unless someone annoys me into it. Because sometimes people get annoyed and they're rude, that's just how people work. But I guess you know that? Since you're annoyed at me and wrote a whole essay trying to make me feel bad?

And just to finish this off.. none of my statements were rebutted. I got lore dumped on and half of it wasn't even interpreted correctly from the linked books. Yes, I don't need to cite like it's an academic paper because all the goddamn info needed was already in my first post. Astarion was not a child because he was a grown ass man with a government job. There's no basis for "Ascended Vampires can't love" because Larian homebrews their vampires so the written lore doesn't apply. That's literally it. People on this site just can't fucking read.

[olde-scratch]

mm momsger high au. i didn't mean to misspell that. inspired by this post from @tobisiksi . sorry this took so long i had everything written out and then tumblr Deleted Everything even tho i had like two backup posts.

i tried to include everyone i could and give all of them unique monster types but there are some repeats :( ib sowwee i tried to make them unique when i could tho. lmk if u have any suggestions for characters or different monster types.

ALSO HAPPY HALLOWEEN!! i have to work but im going dressed as saiki so i still have the spirit

Saiki Kusuo - Lovecraftian Eldritch Horror

i mean. duh.

he poses as his own (human) worshipper to avoid being indoctrinated elsewhere

"i can't attend, i have worship tonight." "oh that's cool who do you worship?" "they don't like being talked about." "ohh so it's an... invite-only system. right......"

deciding now that closed worship systems like saiki purports are generally a total Scam and people avoid them like a plague. it fits with saikis foray into the internet lol

hes still sooo silly dw

to the people with the eldritch kusuo headcanons, i see u..... i hope u like monster high........ :)

Saiki Kuusuke - Cult Worshipper (Human)

bet you thought i was gonna say mad scientist. WRONG that's his day job.

kuusuke operates as a mad scientist since humans aren't allowed into the monster world (afaik humans arent even seen outside of jackson, who is half monster). idk what he makes tho. maybe he pulls a doctor finklestein and makes bone animals to roam the monster world?

kuusuke is the one who got his family into the monster world btw. i mean he definitely found it p quickly after kusuo started morphing and speaking in tongues and shit

kuusuke would LOVE the monster world, at least at first. he might get bored really quickly, but he'd love being able to be more of a crazy bastard than he already is

kuusuke functions as a head cultist for kusuo, but instead of strengthening him with sacrifices and praying for protection, he weakens him with sacrifices (the limiters) and prays for himself to be smote (kusuo to play games with him) (kusuo ignores him a lot)

maybe he made amp/anpu like he did warp. idk.

Saiki Kurumi / Saiki Kuniharu - Cult Worshipper (Human)

they were 100% human before being dragged into the monster world due to their sons

they basically live the same as they do in canon tbh i dont think a lot would change in the monster world

during the new years chapter maybe instead of saying kusuo has powers, they say something about his eldritchness or how glad they are to "worship" such a chill god. god i wanna write this now.

Kaidou Shun - Vampire

okay so not ACTUALLY a vampire but i think it was nopsi who had like an au where kaidou was like a weaker version of a vampire?? GOD i dont remember the name (hampir?? i cant find it on wikipedia, did it start with an f????). for all intents and purposes, im just gonna consider him a weak vampire

i cant remember if he'd be made thru a human/vampire relationship but if he was then i think we should play into the manga hair colors of his siblings and say that whole toki and sora and his mother are all full vampires, he was half vampire (perhaps he's from the father's side of the family from a previous relationship, since his mother has purple hair in her manga cover i think??)

draculara has her red drinks and her spf and her cute little parasol so OF COURSE kaidou has all of those as well. i think it would be very funny if kaidou had his umbrella customized to look like a hidden anime weapon, but it wasn't waterproof so he has to use a different one when it rains

i have a gen 1 og draculara from when i was a kid and i love her she's so cute :] someone draw kaidou in her outfit he'd slay. actually, just draw all of them in her outfit(s). gloom beach teruhashi. sweet screams mera. freak du chic saiki. sweet 1600 saiko. fearleader hairo. you cannot make her look bad idc.

Nendou Riki - Zombie (Frankenstein's Monster type zombie)

okay so this might be controversial but imagine:

everyone's chatting like normal, nendous head falls off, everyone goes deathly silent, nendou puts it back on and goes back to talking, cue kaidou screeching

bc im rewriting this im not gonna go thru my thought process so my idea was that takeuchi was a mad scientist who created midori after himself bc he only had access to a mirror (neither realized they looked the same). takeuchi died and chouno, who was smitten with midori, remade takeuchi who midori named riki and chose to raise as her own. chouno intended it as a poetic final goodbye but cut to 16 years later and hes still not over her lol

nendou being undead could also play into his appreciation for life.... protecting the obviously smaller and weaker saiki and kaidou.... his care for his dad that he never met (altho he might have two dads in this au?).... THE HAMSTER SCENE. NENDOU :((((

Teruhashi Kokomi - Tomie

im SORRY for bringing up junji ito but come ON

for those who dont know tomie, she's basically So Beautiful that men are supernaturally attracted to her until she drives them mad with her beauty. they cut her up and scatter her remains and they turn into more tomies

however. teruhashi isnt just a pretty girl. she's The Perfect Pretty Girl. so we can just ignore all the bloodshed and murder and deathmatches :D

i debated making her a siren but that just doesn't fit her for some reason. she doesn't have to try.

in op's post they made her aphrodite reincarnated but i don't think that there are gods walking amonst the student disembody unfortunately

Teruhashi Makoto - Intersection Bishounen

IM SORRY THE TERHASHI SIBLINGS JUST FIT JUNJI ITO SO WELL

the intersection bishounen is a vengeful spirit that roams the streets and gives fortunes to young girls that drive them to suicide, after which they come back as ghosts and beg for his affection.

makoto is more of a teenage/ya heartthrob than a vengeful spirit tho so we can get rid of all the cool stuff like fortune telling and driving to suicide

the intersection bishounen also didnt want to fuck his cousin so points to him

Hairo Kineshi - Fire Elemental

i KNOW he's BORING

think of heath. i think heath is like the son of hades or something idfk i say fuck that ive never heard that before until i started getting back into monster high that's not canon to me

theres... a surprisingly low amount of sports name puns :( there's casketball, ofc ofc, because mh is american. there's monster soccer from toralei's ghoul spirit notebook, but baseball and tennis from clawdeen and spectra dont get named so they dont have names. thats BULLSHIT btw someone who's good w puns help me im freezing up

gilda goldstag was also a fire elemental right? i dont actually know anything about her other than that she was in the student council bc she was in the doll pack

theres a wind elemental mentioned in spectras ghoul spirit notebook. figured that id mention it idk

i have nothing else to say this should be obvious

Mera Chisato - Shouku-jinki

okay i need to preface this with something that is very important to me about this, the Japanese creature the jikininki/shoku-jinki originated in the story of musou the preist. as far as ive been able to see, there is a second story featured on wikipedia about a pregnant woman that is legitimately someone's fucking oc insert. im not making this up, it appeared one goddamn day and i dont want to make an acc just to get rid of it but i dont want to have my ip address just There and i dont know how to like draw attention to it. so please know that the story of musou is the only legitimate source of the jikininki and the "jijinki" are just someones fucking oc inserts. i dont know why they did this, i dont know how it's still there bc its been YEARS how has no one removed it??

anyways im calm now.

jikininki (or, iirc the more modern version is shoku-jinki) are demons that were greedy or impious in life and were cursed to wander the earth forever starving and thirsty. at night, they eat dead bodies.

sooo remember how mera acted when she got her money back for a day.

her death was the cause of their bankruptcy, maybe they put all their money towards avenging her?

i think that mera would come from a half human, half monster family so she could already be in the monster world, but i dont have to worry about what powers she'd have due to being a monster.

her mother would be a demon and her father a human who doesn't quite know how to navigate the monster would, so he still has to go away to earn money. also imagine four kids following mera around, three have devil horns and taiks and one is just some guy. (idk if she has 4 siblings but you get the idea)

so yeah, mera is immortal, unable to feel satisfied by any amount of food or drink, working herself to the bone to provide for her siblings. the mera lore is Strong w this one.

u could totally also go for some real body horror with her if u wanted

Yumehara Chiyo - Ghost

ill go into the difference between ghosts and souls in toritsuka's part since you cant take away toritsukas thing but you cant just remove ghosts from mh

i initially thought of making her a cherub/cupid but girlie would be getting No One Together. also there's only one cupid in mh and uhhhh there would be no hope if that was chiyo. yk what chiyo loves tho? gossip. u know what spectra loves? gossip.

i think the ghosts in mh all have a chain motif iirc? ik spectra does but sirena von boo also does (the siren/ghost hybrid) and i dont know any other ghosts off the top of my head

anyways yumehara is totally just a regular people ghost. maybe she cries blood or somethin fun like that? maybe have a bit where she keeps getting told off for having makeup and its her eyes leaking or its her having anti blood leaking drops or wipes

Saiko Metori - Mummy

i was gonna make him a vampire but HELLO??? CLEO IS RIGHT THERE????

rich, bratty, self-centered?? DE NILE IS CLEOS LAST NAME.

idk if him being a mummy would change him like cosmetically, like skin tone or hair texture or whatever but i cant draw so that doesn't quite matter to me. altho ig hed probably just look like a pale, dehydrated, brittle pile of bandages if you wanna be historicallty accurate

his father glows because he's ra next question

he definitely decks himself out in a looott more gold than just his earring as a mummy. bangles, cuffs rings, anklets, hair accessories.

the bodyguards are just the tomb protectors that cleo gets as slaves

he gets a custom made desk of pure gold at pk and he never uses it

i think in ancient egypt married couples would be buried together regardless of if at least the wife was dead or alive, so he definitely propositions teruhashi to take a sand nap with him

he gets a pet crocodile. he has a tiger in canon i think and cleo gets a snake so like. nile crocodile obviously.

i cant tell if he lives in a pyramid just randomly in the middle of hidari wakibara, or if theres a bit about nendou asking him where his pyramid is and saikos just like "bro i Dont Live In A Pyramid."

Kuboyasu Aren - Werewolf

hello?? violent, tragic past that comes back to haunt them regularly and interfere with their daily lives?????

i dont think werewolves can turn into wolves in mh but like if you want doggy kuboyasu who's as big as kaidou, go for it

KUBOYASU WITH DOGGY EARS AND A TAIL.... i dont think that werewolves in mh have tails but thats. a crime.

kuboyasu can smell the rest of the cast. god i wanna know what they smell like in the non weirdest way possible.

i dont have a lot to say about this. doguyasu

Toritsuka Reita - Cult Worshipper (Human)

okay so there's a difference between ghosts and souls in this version. ghosts are a form of undead that are sort of just humans that can float and go thru walls and stuff. souls are the base forms of dead people that remain chained to existence with no knowledge of who they were. normal people can see ghosts, but not souls. toritsuka can see both

toritsuka was also raised in a temple in this au, pretty standard stuff. nothing interesting there.

:)

so yk how toritsuka found out abt saiki thru the souls

and yk how saikis an eldritch monster that melts mind and twists reality to his will in this au

toritsuka does not know the meaning of the term eldritch btw

if ur a torisai or toritsuka angst fan then u can always imagine toritsuka thinking himself inferior to the rest of the pk psychickers bc he's a human and didnt even find saiki by himself, but with the help of his ghosts. sorry i gotta push the torisai agenda.

i personally also hc him to be hypersexualized by the adults in his life due to his touchyness from a young age which lead to him being ostracized by his peers when he began repeating the behavior, thus encouraging the development of touch starvation that he misinterpreted as horniness. in other words, "damn bitch u live like this?". sooo do with that what u will in this au.

(could saiki like..... taste his desperation??)

Aiura Mikoto - Cult Worshipper (Devil)

basically aiura but with cute devil horns and a tail that reacts with her mood. she 100% bedazzles and paints her horns like she paints her nails.

shes still a prophet and stuff but like shes just a lil demonic now. as she deserves.

"yeah i can totes check ur future!!" (rips open a portal to the underworld, chants in a forgotten language, focuses in on one damned soul that writhes and screams for mercy as it withers out of existence where it will wait to be reborn into hell after being offered the temporary reprieve of total nothingness) "babe ur bf is cheating on u like one hundo percent. but ur gonna be a bomb ass doctor one day!!"

i want her to trip toritsuka with her tail

she's not human and she lords it over toritsuka's head when they fight for saiki's attention

Akechi Touma - Cult Worshipper (Human)

initially i wanted to make him a bugboy bc yea but consider

saiki knew him in elementary school so he pulled a real I Tracked Down My Childhood Friend Who Is Actually An Eldritch Monster Masquerading as a Pretty Boy with Pink Hair in a High School?!

yeah soo like what if their dynamic was "what if we were friends in our childhood years before you had to leave to stop the uncontrollable desire you had to break down my reality and drive me into irreversible madness, yet despite knowing the danger i faced i still hunted you down, my prayers meant solely to get a response from you devolving into genuine reverence, solidifying myself as your most loyal devotee...... haha jk. unless?"

we all know that akechi likely faced no difficulty finding the monster world dont even ask

you can insert ur own hcs with his mom all ill say is that shes probably masquerading as some sort of cult worshipper or jekyll/hyde situation to live in the monster world. or maybe he just moved schools and lives sort of nearby but not in the monster world idk

akechi would fucking Love the monster world. he'd never get bored of it. you know the sweet potato scene? oh, honey, he's got access to information about the average size of different monsters, along with the influence of proportions and size, magical interference, etc etc. hed fucking LOVE the monster world.

Satou Hiroshi - Ghost

ive already got three ghosts (see suzumiya and makino) but i couldnt think of the Most Generic monster but hear me out

he's a sheet

hes got two black or cut out circles for eyes and a little 'o' for a mouth. just fuckin 0 。0 .

HES SO. USELESS.

SO PLAIN.

SO BORING.

SO GENERIC.

SO. PERFECT.

and saiki is IN LOVE WITH HIM.

toritsuka is honestly so offended that he is not the ghost-themed object of saiki's affections

satous friends and baseball team are either the core basic monsters (werewolf, vampire, zombie, etc) or theyre basic japanese spirits. im. not doing tons of research on if there are generic japanese demons or if theres just sort of one kind of demon that has a lot of forms,,,, im so sorry i can only do so much research please correct me if you know better

Rifuta Imu - Catgirl

i dont know what the name of the actual catgirls are in mh (werecats?) like purrsephone and toralei and meowlody but fuck it catgirl

she would have THE cutest collar. OR she'd have a ribbon around her neck w a matching one on her tail like catrine de mew. she could maybe even have some sort of shredded piece of clothing like catty noir's skirt or a habit of shredding things

im sorry i dont know a lot about cat breeds so i dont have a lot to say about her species

cat themed accessories.......

btw she's a cat bc of japans obsession w cats. i considered making HER a siren since i scrapped that idea for teruhashi but i feel like it just. doesn't suit her.

Bonuses (people i couldnt find that much to talk about)

Suzumiya Hii - Cursed Soul

i mean what else would she be.

okay so shes not a SOUL shes a GHOST i just think it sounds better like that

Makino Arisu - Ghost

ring-style ghost. i think it's called a yuurei? i did my research for her but i forgot it and the og post got deleted so. im upset.

Matsuzaki - Headless Horseman

idk what is his horse would be i just wanted bloodgood to have Presence in this and the principal is only seen like. three times.

i considered giving kuboyasu the status as headless horseman bc of his motorcycle but g1 bloodgood did not serve that much cunt for her type to be given to a 16 year old im sorry

(i also recently got a bloodgood as my first doll when i got back into mh and i love her :] she came w a cool coat that isnt her og coat but its nice anyways)

Chouno Urkyoku - Mad Jester

okay so ik i said he was a mad scientist but he retired that in order to go into entertainment. it's not going too well.

you could also go for a ringmaster/clown route but we all lived thru 2016 (or was it 2017?) and the ensuing cliche-ifying treatment the media gave scary clowns put me off them personally lol they kind of bore me

(if u don't live in the us or don't know what im talking about that happened in 2016, then god i envy you. just look up "2016 clowns usa" im sure you'll figure it out)

Michael (Ikemi something I think?) - Zombie

idk it just fits him

zombies in g1 can only communicate thru moans which makes them nonverbal in some way but g3 STOLE that from us. fuck them.

Nendou Midori / Nendou Takeuchi - Frankenstein & His Monster

i explained this in nendous thing im not repeating myself sorry

PK Principal - Gorgon

yes its bc of the glasses

also i think theres something fun about being able to say he can rule the school with an iron fist (or ig rock fist) without needing to use his eyes

Kongou - Minotaur

big strong and VIOLENT. you can also play into manny's more delicate side with kongous change of heart after saiki helps him realize what matsuzaki does for him

Takahashi - Goblin

idk i think it just suits him

Shima - Changeling

her whole bit is being a forgettable face so what if she was always just a Little Bit Different every time you saw her

Iridatsu family - Mummy

okay ik ive already done mummy but HEAR ME OUT.

idk abt the mom but i think it would be funny if yuuta was just covered in bandages and his whole thing is tripping over/hitting people with them

The pervy teacher who wasn't actually pervy at all he just had an unfortunate face - Human

he's not even disguised as anything

the monsters saw him and said "nah im p sure he's one of us" and then took him

teacher doesnt quite care cause the monster world has better health plans /j

The "your manga artist is gnc af" guy - Kitsune

kitsune are typically seen as elusive tricksters which doesnt suit his character BUT

theres a whole joke about japanese mangakas being worked to the bone to provide chapters every week or so for serialization even going so far as to hide or make excuses as to why they did not complete the chapter

i feel so bad for them bro i could not (used to do weekly updates for fics for 5 years before i started needing money bc i turned 18)

also. someone give that man fox ears and a tail.

The Alphonse guy - Invisi Billy

idk what invisi billy is but he can be here helping alphonse hide from the shame of his chunnibyou :D

Makoto's rival guy - Banshee

it just. Suits Him.

idk if there are male banshees bc we only know sarah screams and her mom but we can have a trans icon if we need