#i love making playlists they r so fun
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Happy birthday!!!!! This is my fifth (5th) Time drawing Kyle and my first (1st) Time drawing Alex!!!!!! please know I miss her-
AAAAAAAAAKJSHFKJLASHGFIUWAHFIUAWHFUIASHFIUH AIUF HAWUIOF HIAPUWH FPUIAWH F UIAWH FUIWAGH FUIAWG FUIAW GHFUHJGAYUFGWAUYJHFGAJWHGF AHWUIGFILJAHDFJLKGSD HKJFGH AWLIUJGF IUWAY FIUASH FKJHDSKJFHKJDSLFH KJAHFKJLAH FKJG HF ILUAW HTHEKMM THEMMMMM THEMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OMGGGGGGKAJHWSFKJALSGKFJGAWLKJF
THEYRE ON THEIR LIKE 1ST DATE ITS PRE EVERYTHING IMM
ALEX HAS PRETTY MAKE UP ON & KYLE JUST "omg pretyt" OR AKJSFHLJAWK AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
OIFMADFIKJHAJKGHFKA FAWWWWWWWA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAFHASKJFH MADIIIII MADI I CANT FORM WORDS ITS THEM!!!!! U DREW THEM!!!!!!!!!!
#THIS IS GONNA B KYLES 1ST KSIS TRUST#HES GONNA MESS IT UP SM LIKE AN IDIOT#I LOVE ALEX I LOVE HER SM OMG 1st time drawing erh I WANNA SAY LIES BUT IK UR NOT#bc u wouldve sent me her.....u.....u wouldve#AAAAAAAAAAAAAKLSHFLKJAGFAUWJGFW#U DRAW THEM SO PERFECT IM KICKING MY FEET ALL OVER THE PLACE THIS THEM THEM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#ASGFDLJKASGFJHAGJFSKGHDASJLFGASLHJLFGASLJHFKJASHFKJASHFKJSHDJKGFHAKJFGJKASHDK:JAHS:KJFHAS:KJFHKJSDHFKJDSLGHFKJLHADKFJHDSKJFHKJADHFKJHADKLJF#HFJKLHGADKJFGHASKJGFHJASLGFHJGASJHFGJAHFJDSHGLJFKGDAHJFGJHDSGFHJDSGFJHGAJHFGJHASGDHJGASJHDKGASJHDGASJHFGJDAHGFJHDSGFJHAGKSDKFJHGDAKJHFGDKJS#I AM SO NORMAL ABOUT THEM ACTUALYL#ALEX ALEX I MISS U SM I MISS U SM#THREYERE PERFECT OMG#I#A:HFKJHWAUIFGWAIUFLGASIHFBKAJHFIULAGFUIAWHFUKASGHFIULAGFJULKAGWFKJAWHLKFUJHAWKUJFGHAWKJFGAKWFGAHJWGFKJLAWGFJHAWGFJHAWLGFJHLAWGFJHAGFJHLAWGF#HFASHFKJAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA#MY BRAIN IS JUST THINKING OF CUTE CHEESY 1ST DATES IKD#IDK IF THEY HAVE A CANON 1ST DATE OR ANYTHING BUT LIKE PLSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS#CANON IS MY BRAIN RN ITS MY BIRTHDAY TMR((2day if ur ahead bc u r but like))#AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAFILWHA:KJFYHWAUIKFHGUIWAGFIUYAWGFIUWGAFUGWAI:UFGAWIFGIAUFGIUAWGFIUWAGFIUWAGFUIAWGFIUAGWFIUAGFIUAWG#I NEED THEM 2 SHARE PLAYLISTS & MAKE FUN OF SILLY MUSIC 4 FUN THEN GO FEED DUCKS OR SMTH#KYLES GONNA GET CHASED BY 1 SERVES U RIGHT THEY WERE GEESE KYLE#THEYRE GONNA DRINK A LIL 4 FUN BUT U CAN FUN DRINK!!!! & LIKE THEYRE BOTH GONNA START HAVING A BIT OF THEIR VALLEYA CCENT SHOW I JUST#JSUT AAAAAAAAAA:FKHLWAKIHFOWHAOIHFOIWHAOIHFOIHWAHHHHFIHSAKJFHDJSHGFJSDHFGJKFDHGJKFDHGLKJHSKDHFKLJS#THEYRE GONNA FALL SO IN LOVE W/EACHOTHER IM GONNA GO INSANE#alex dewitt#kyle rayner#dc#reblog#tehe madi art#:3#AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWIOFHAWPIUFGUIWAGFUIAWGHFIUAHUIWFa
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*starts listening to the thg playlist*
augh -1 health
oof -1 health
ugh! -1 health
mmf -1 health
ugh! -1 health
augh -1 health
etc
GOOD that’s the effect i wanted >:)
#i wish so badly that i could annotate it. when will my husband (8tracks annotations) come back from the war#i made a rule that i was not allowed to take any songs from the soundtracks#until it was all finished and then i can pepper the best ones in sparingly#(abraham’s daughter & gale song & everybody wants to rule the world r going on there for sure)#i wanted to make myself get really creative without the crutch of the soundtracks although they r bangers#like we HAVE to start with the woods by daughter because it’s about sisters.#and if you forget that the hunger games is a story about a girl who loves her sister you have lost the plot#o children by nick cave is about children killing and being cleaned up and shipped off on a train. like ok#eat your young is self explanatory#so is kill our way to heaven (really digs into the mentality of a tribute imo)#glory and gore is on there because i genuinely thought lorde made that song for the movie#die first? well that’s katpee to a T (people who call them everlark u are boring and people who call them peeniss that’s too much for me)#(i think katpee is the funniest ship name ever so i’m using it)#who are you really is like who are you. really. but also i have nothing left to lose / see me bare my teeth for you !!!!!!!!#GOSSIP BY MÅNESKIN. FINNICK SONG. SIP THE GOSSIP DRINK TILL YOU CHOKE.#17 by ladytron :| also a finnick song perhaps :| but works for the other victors also :| they only want you when you’re 17 :|#AND THEN FEED THE MACHINE IS SO MUCH FUN RAAAAAAAAA WTF IS A LABOR UNION HEY (HEY) YOU (YOU) FEED THE MACHINE#if you only listen to one song on the playlist is should be that one because its just such a banger#wires by the neighborhood is like help me kill the president we’re gonna send him straight to hell (and it rules)#and then feel something by jaymes young is about a young person who is emotionally damaged beyond repair 🙃 had to end it on that one
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I think I'm done with them enough to post, so here's the playlists I made:
Mizuki's was harder to put together since I had to consider songs that match the way the present their self, and songs that match how they actually are and feel. (I fit songs that represent them, not things they'd really sing btw)
I kept adding and removing songs because I overthink a lot but the songs do fit them lyrically. Playlist is organized first with positive, energetic songs to match how they present their self. As it plays, the songs stay energetic but aren't as positive or optimistic and become aggressive lyrically, a lot of them somewhat being things Zuki would say to themself, Favorite Liar is a good example of this. Favorite Liar and Bitchboy are there mostly to fit with Akita as they grew up together, their tastes are pretty similar, except Mizuki changed a lot more which I'll explain eventually
The Flavor of a Cockroach is the song that I think really splits the playlist in half, the songs after that are more representative of Mizuki's true feelings and essentially them experiencing burnout, unable to keep up the act anymore. I don't wanna explain every song cause I think it'll be too much on one post but if you're curious, feel free to ask me I love answering questions.
Akita's playlist is also sorta messy but songs still all work for them. If I could use only The Oozes and Metric songs I probably would because they're perfect tone wise. Akita is very aggressive with their singing and has a hostile persona for their performances but as a person, they're blunt but very caring for others. They still occasionally pick fights like she and Mizuki did in their youth but she isn't as sadistic and see's brawls as pointless fun instead of a form of lashing out. (I gotta explain Akita for things to make sense cause I have never said a word about her despite thinking of her all the time)
Ugo is a song that's really about Akita's and Mizuki's relationship before Zuki split. The couple songs after that are things they'd sing but the lyrics are similar to the sorta story I have going on between Zuki and Akita. Akita was basically abandoned by Zuki when they were younger as they just disappeared one day and no one gave a shit about them gone except Akita. Mizuki left without saying a word and also avoided any form of contact from her as they convinced themself that she'd hate them for running. So Akita at some point joined a band and based some of the things they'd perform on actual feelings, and one day while traveling with the band to Japan, found Zuki (Mizuki actually found her and went to see her).
I'm skipping talking about Fahrradsattel and Wet for reasons. What You Waiting For? is where Akita and Mizuki meet again and Akita starts questioning why Zuki changed and seemingly became a nobody compared to the brutal fighter they once were, she doesn't understand why they became so different and hangout with people they'd both once considered weak and a waste of space (Akita is very harsh about things and immediately, she and the Matsus don't really like each other (and Totoko and Nyaachan very much despise her btw)).
Littlefang might be out of place there but it's a personal favorite of mind, I care about the song a lot and wanted to include it. It'd be a song Akita would perform (the actual character in this song is supposed to be a cat puppet but we're ignoring that for dog themed band reasons) the song as way of connecting with people ig, adding to the last songs, she doesn't wanna change herself to please others and wants others to believe it too (especially Mizuki). The song is very different from the bands usual thing but I like to think Mizuki's optimistic personality rubs off on her when she performs it and it ends up working out. (I just really like this song teehee <3)
I still don't wanna explain every song rn but if your curious about any choice, feel free to ask. I don't mind explaining story stuff and I like talking about these two dorks.
Ok rambling over, thank you if you read this or listened the playlists <3
#oc#i started using spotify just for this btw#yes i did think about this shit too much#it was fun#anyway uhh ill rb this when people r awake#sorry i always do stuff when no ones up#all the songs in these playlists are songs i listen to btw#i dont listen to one specific genre i go all over the place for whatever sounds good to me#thats why Mizuki's is sorta messy#also Barbie movie had good songs i added one because it's so fun#LOVE HOW I TALKED MORE ABOUT AKITA THAN ZUKI#/ semi sarcasm#had to make up for not saying a word about her#alright seeya#Spotify
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🧡 we gots to go to sleep but its so hard getting everyone to agree gotta like hold meetings and shit like damn if ur gna just argue the whole time i might as well b making ship playlists for us yk
#tcest#im lov making playlists they are so fun i have way too many! one for each of us and one for all of us and one for each pairing of us#no ot3 bc that makes me sad i dont want anybody left out#also me n raphie r close#so are lee and dee#but we're all together just. the twins gravitate to each other and raphie n i gravitate together#prly to avoid the twins jk i love you#nutjobs lmao stop fighting and maybe i'll stop talking shit :3
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i will ALWAYS be salty abt the ed-sheeranification of one ok rock (one of my fave personality-building anecdotes i explain at parties to ppl getting to know me) but the fact is that takas voice is soooo hot he could sing the words on the back of a milk carton to the tune of a t*ylor sw*ft song + id probably still listen to him. sorry
#well actually that isnt true bc i very rarely ever listen to oor anymore. theyve made so much terrible music its tainted their good shit#but like twice a year i go back thru their discography and reminisce over niche syndrome.....a guy can dream#whenever they release new stuff i always get my hopes up theyre gonna go back to their roots and they never do. saaad#but i have this weird grandmotherly love for taka whenever i see him in music videos for his new stuff im like aww how Nice :^)#wish he hadnt outgrown his emo phase but thats ok im glad hes enjoying himself and the band seems to be popular still#.diaries#i do have a big old soft spot for ambitions era even if its kinda mid. its associated w a lot of nice memories i have of my ex#if nothing else i appreciate how earnest their music was around then.... god listening now and i still know All The Lyrics lmfao#still mad they replaced the japanese vers with an english rerecord for release outside of japan tho. that was unnecessary 😐#maaann my ex had VERY different music taste to me but its sweet how many bands are rose tinted for me bc of them#like theres some stuff i would never have voluntarily listened to. but listening to them talk excitedly carved a niche in my ears#they made me a bunch of playlists for things they found that they thought id like.. i still have some of them saved/backed up#im surprised some of the ogs still exist tbh bc they unfollowed me on spotify + privated/deleted a ton of shit like a year ago#but a couple r still standing.. idk id like to think maybe they left them bc they had some nice memories too. i could never hate them man#SORRY FOR TALKING ABT MY EX AGAIN this music just takes me right back. im v glad we're not dating or in each others lives anymore#but also u cant be that close w someone for that long without them having a lifelong impact on u. or at least i cant anyway#and its nice to remember them fondly sometimes even if we were both cunts to each other. hope theyre doing alright wherever they are#god i need to start dating again its so fun i miss it so much. once im settled in the new place + i have a secure job....#i mean ik who id LIKE to date but im pretty sure that aint happening lmaooo. ill get over it i love meeting new ppl anyway#okay enough rambling im gonna go make lunch if ur reading this far ily hope ur having a nice day XOXO aaaaand post
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Hi! Would you write a smut fic about getting high with Mattheo?
R U High Mine⎥Mattheo Riddle
summary: you come back from the holiday's with some weed for you and the boys. When you and Mattheo smoke while showing him some songs, it get's a little heated between the two of you.
warnings: Filthy smut yasss, getting high, so drugs/weed, smoking, best friends to lovers, making out, vocal mattheo (ugh), dirty talk, fingering, unprotected p in v, aftercare, mattheo calling reader slut and whore
note: I saw this in the car and had an immediate idea how to write this, had much fun. Thank you for the request I hope you like it. 💚
song: I recommend listening to the song "R U Mine" or "Why'd you only call me when you're high" by Arctic Monkeys, trust me babes. Or hear the playlist "Are you high mine" from my Spotify.
The boys and Pansy already waited for me in the common room as I arrived at Hogwarts again. It was like Christmas for them, knowing I would always bring them their favorite treat after the holiday's.
I smiled at them, knowing they were thinking the same as me as they smiled back at me. "Y/n!" Pansy was the first to stand up and hug me. From all the people I called my friends, I was closest to her. " Hey Pansy, how are you?" I asked, letting my bags fall to hug her back.
"I'm great! We're waiting for you girl. Everyone's here already." she giggled as she let go of me so I could great the rest.
I gave everyone a hug, at last Mattheo, who kissed my cheek. " How are you princess?" he asked, scanning my face. " I'm good Matt, thanks." I smile at him and sit beside him on the armrest. " What about you?" " Fine now that you're here." I rolled my eyes playfully at his answer.
"You know we're all happy to see you y/n, but do you have it?" Draco asked, shifting impatient in his seat. I think from all of us, he was the one with the most need for it. He was constantly on the edge, maybe even worse If it wasn't for Pansy who comforted him the best she could. He had all the pressure of his father on his shoulders and It was clear to see what it did to him. So a little smoke from now and then did good for him.
"Of course I have it, how could I forget when all of you reminded me the whole 2 weeks of it in each letter you wrote?" I say sarcastic, with a little smirk on the edge of my lips.
I grabbed my purse and pulled out a big black bag with already little packed baggy's, also black so you couldn't see what's in it, for each of them.
"Oh my god it's more than usually, right?" Enzo said, gawking at the little bags in my hand. I chuckled as I gave each one of them their own little bag so they could divide it up for the next few weeks.
"Yeah it is indeed more than usual. Got a good prize for it." " Wait let me pay what we didn't give you." Draco said, grabbing into his pockets but I shook my head. " No it's good. I'm friends with him since we were kids." He nodded and opened his bag to smell it, saying "You know I never thought I would say that but I wouldn‘t have thought I would ever be this happy to have a friend who is part of the muggle world."
I laughed at his comment, before giving the last bag to Mattheo. "I've got something else for you." I grinned at him, knowing he'll love it.
Obviously things like wifi don't exist here so I buyed him an MP3 player with lots and lots of battery's so he could listen to music. This time I brought an CD player and made a few Playlists for him.
His smile got bigger as he saw me pulling it out of my bag. "What's that?" Blaise asked, watching us. " It's an CD Player so you can hear Music a little louder than with headset."
"You wanna hear it?" I ask, Mattheo nodding. " Yeah princess, let's go." He grabbed my bags and gave me my purse. "See you later guy's." I waved at the rest of them.
It became a ritual for us to listen to music every time I came back from holiday's, so the group already knew what's going on.
We walked towards mine and Pansy's dorm we shared which was no issue to her as Mattheo and Draco shared a dorm so she would always go over to Draco's.
"You roll the weed and I'm gonna put on the music mkay? Grinder is in the top drawer." I say while walking towards my desk and putting the CD player on it, putting the battery in it and the first CD I wanted to show him. In the meantime he sat down on my bed and grinned the weed smaller before rolling it into a J.
"Ready." He smiled at me and tapped the place beside him on the bed. "Okay, so this is a band I want to show you, they're called "Arctic Monkeys" and I think you'll love them." Confident I sat down next to him after starting the Music. He lit the J and handed it over to me. "Here, you go first." "Thanks." I took the first drag and inhaled it deeply into my lungs before grinning and exhaling the smoke. " Oh it's good. Marc didn't disappoint." "Marc huh?" he asked as he took his first drag. " So you two are close or anything?"
I shrugged with my shoulders before laying down on my back. " Kind of, but not as close as I'm with you guys. I know him since I'm a kid, he's also the only one who knows about Hogwarts beside my parents."
He scanned my face as I was talking, slowly dragging his gaze from my eyes to my lips. I saw it but didn't think about it as I slowly but surely felt the weed have an effect.
"Damn, you were right. The music is great. It's a bit..edgy." " Yeah I know but it's great for smoking." I giggle and turn my head back towards the ceiling as the song "Why'd you only call me when you're high" started to play. " That's my second favorite." I tell him, feeling the weed calming me down but also making my senses and nerves more sensitive and reactive.
"What's your favorite?" "It comes after a few songs, just wait, I will tell you."
We layed down a little longer, smoking the J until it was ready and we were high as fuck. "Shit, it feels so good to be like this again." he groans, sending shivers down my spine. I turned my head towards him, seeing him looking at the ceiling.
I always had a crush on Mattheo. I loved when he was all flirty with me, while with nobody other. We both had partners before but I always felt some kind of pull towards him. My eyes scanned him, looking at his sharp jawline at first. I also loved looking at it, made me feel some type of way. Especially when it moved while he smoked.
Suddenly his eyes hit mine and maybe it's the weed but I had a feeling as If there was more in his gaze. Again, he looks at my eyes and then at my lips, licking his own.
Then my favorite song started playing. " That's my favorite." I said, watching him looking to the CD player. I wait a litte before he reacts to it. He breathed out heavily before looking at me. "You know where I would love to hear it?" "No tell me." "When we fuck." he says bluntly.
My eyes widened in shock, not knowing If I imagined things now. Before I could say anything he rolled over on top of me, grabbed my neck and kissed me with passion I've never felt before in my life. I opened my mouth as his tongue licked over my bottom lip. He groaned against my lips and pressed his body even more against mine, letting one hand beside my head to support himself and the other which was at my neck, now wandering over my stomach.
My breathing got faster and heavier due the haze and the arousal I suddenly felt. "Fuck, you don't even know how long I've been wanting to do this." He lowers his head down to my throat in a rush, leaving my lips trembling.
Goosebumps erupted over my skin as I felt his tongue licking my skin and his teeth carefully biting it. " Mattheo.." I moaned and let my hands go trough his hair, pulling on some strands. "What princess? What do you need hm?" he mumbles against my neck.
I arched my back and pressed my hips against his, feeling he's already hard. I gasped at the friction and bit my lip right after. " Need to feel you." "Where, tell me where. I wanna hear you say it." he groans, pressing against my hips.
"Everywhere. Fuck me." I would have never said that so bluntly without the weed, but I'm so grateful that we did smoke.
He growled against my skin, leaving wet kisses all over it before sitting up between my legs and letting both his hands roam over my skin under the hoodie I wore. It didn't take him long before pulling it over my head together with my shirt under it, seeing I was wearing no bra.
His lips parted and a smile formed on them. " You're so beautiful y/n, shit why didn't we do this sooner." His hand wandered up to my chest, massaging them and playing with my nipples teasing them. I mewled at the feeling and arched my back again. " Mattheo please. I need more."
"Don't have to ask me twice, princess." He opened the button of my jeans and pulled them down. He got rid of his clothes too until we were both only in our underwear.
I looked down and saw how big he was, just trough his boxershorts, making me gulp a little. "Don't worry, I'll go slow. Or do you want it rough?" I nodded quickly. " Rough. Fuck me like - " " Like what?" I gulped again before answering in a whisper. " Like a slut." " Oh you mean like my slut? Because after this you'll go nowhere but to me If you need to be fucked. Understood?" Ahh imagine him saying this ugh
I nodded. "Good girl." he said smiling, his voice and words making me even wetter. His fingers slowly stroked over my slip, making him biting his lip and almost moan. "Feel how wet you are you fucking slut? Wet for your best friend?"
I moaned and closed my eyes as he slipped a finger under the fabric and right inside of me. "Fuck, you're so tight. Nobody fucked you good the last few months huh?" I shook my head as I couldn't form any words. " Yeah that's gonna change from now on." He pumped his fingers a few more times inside of me, putting pressure to my clit with his thumb before pulling down his boxer shorts and my slip.
He pressed his tip against my entrance, looking at me. " Ready?" "Yeah.." I breathed out. He slowly pushed inside me, scanning my face, his eyes a little hooded.
My hands grabbed his hair again as he completely bottomed me out. "Oh yes.." I moaned, closing my eyes and parting my lips.
"You feel so good princess." he groaned and started to thrust inside me fast and rough, not thinking twice If someone outside in the common room could hear the bed hitting the wall. I wanted to say something but every word got stuck in my throat at his merciless fucking.
"What huh? Am I fucking you stupid you little whore? Fuck I love this, how fucked out you already look, not even able to speak." he growls into the air.
The only thing I felt was him inside me, thrusting faster and faster every minute that passed. I couldn't concentrate on anything else beside him. "M-mattheo I'm close.." " You wanna cum baby? Beg me like the little slut you wanted to be."
His thrusts became erratic and sloppy and I heard his breathing getting harder. "Fuck, please let me cum Mattheo. Please, I'm begging you." I moan loudly as my walls clench around his cock.
"Fuck fuck fuck.." he groaned, thrusting hard one last time before spilling inside me and circling his fingers on my sensitive clit. "Come around my cock baby." And I did. I did so hard that my vision went black for a moment and his name left my lips over and over again.
"Yeah, love how you almost look possessed. Possessed by my cock." he grins down at me, slowly pulling out of me.
I swallowed and looked at him, mind dizzy." "That was so good Mattheo." I said, trying to catch my breath.
"Oh believe me princess, that won't be the last time. You're mine now."
I hope you had fun reading, I had so much fun writing this. 😍
Let me know what ya'll think about this hehe. 👀
My Masterlist
xoxo Sarah <3
#mattheo riddle smut#mattheo riddle imagine#slytherin boys#slytherin imagine#slytherin smut#theodore nott oneshot#theodore nott smut#theodore nott x reader#harry potter masterlist#theodore nott imagine#theodore nott x y/n#mattheo riddle masterlist#sub mattheo riddle#mattheo riddle blurb#mattheo riddle x you#mattheo riddle headcanon#mattheo riddle fluff#mattheo riddle x reader#mattheo riddle
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Girls' Trip (Plus Tim)
Requested Here!
Pairing: Tim Bradford x shy!fem!reader
Summary: You and Lucy go on a road trip together, but Tim crashes your girls' weekend when the car breaks down.
Warning: just fluff, the car breaks down but Lucy + r are safe
Word Count: 1.3k+ words
Masterlist | Tim Bradford Masterlist | Request Info/Fandom List
Picture from Pinterest (this is Tim when Lucy doesn't invite him😂)
“I’ll see you tomorrow,” Tim says as he clips Kojo’s leash to his collar.
“No, you won’t,” you remind him softly. “Lucy and I are going out of town for the weekend, remember?”
“Right,” Tim agrees skeptically. “Because you and Lucy alone for a whole weekend sounds like something you’d do.”
“Yeah, she’s picking me up in the morning.”
“Call me if you need anything, okay?” You nod, and Tim gently lifts your chin to meet your eyes. “Anything at all.”
“I will.”
Kojo licks your hand in farewell and wags his tail as he follows Tim outside. You release a breath before you walk to your room to double-check that everything you need for the weekend is in your bag.
“Good morning!’ Lucy cheers when you step outside. “This is going to be so much fun! Our first girls’ trip!”
You smile at her enthusiasm and try to fight off your building shyness. Since you started dating Tim, Lucy has become one of your closest friends, but her outgoing attitude can bring out your shy side.
“Okay, get comfortable, but not too comfortable,” Lucy says as you walk toward the car. “We’re stopping before we get far to load up on snacks. We have to get essentials.”
“Sounds good,” you reply as you buckle your seatbelt.
As Lucy reverses out of the driveway, you text Tim to let him know that you’re leaving, you love him, and you will see him and Kojo when you get back.
“Hey, since you have your phone out, you can control the music for now. Partly because we need good music for a girls’ trip, but I also don’t want to accidentally wear you out by talking the whole drive.”
“Have you had coffee already?” you ask, though you think you already know the answer.
“You and Tim both do that,” she points out. “But, yes, I needed to make sure I had the energy to get us all the way there and then make our spa appointment.”
“Thanks for planning everything,” you say before turning on a playlist with songs you and Lucy both like.
“Of course, that’s what best friends and future maids of honor are for,” Lucy answers.
After a quick stop for snacks, you get on the interstate to begin the several-hour road trip to the resort Lucy reserved for you. The trip seemed last minute to you, but you found out after she invited you that Lucy wanted to get to know you more and ran everything by Tim as she planned the weekend. Having a friend like Lucy is a big step for you, but you already love her and think she is maid of honor material. If you and Tim get there, and you aren't too shy to say yes when he asks, of course.
“Okay, so I was thinking,” Lucy begins before she trails off and looks at the gauges on the dash.
“Is everything okay?” you ask.
“Something feels weird. We have gas and the temperature is okay, but it doesn’t usually feel like this. I’m going to get off at the next exit.”
You alert her to the upcoming exit and give her directions to a nearby truck stop. Tim taught you the importance of stopping somewhere safe no matter where you are or what you’re doing, and you unconsciously follow his advice today.
“It won’t go back in drive,” Lucy laments as she fiddles with the gear shift.
“Do you want me to call Tim? We’re still pretty close,” you offer.
“He’ll kill me for this,” Lucy whispers before she says, “Please.”
You pull your phone out as Lucy turns the ignition off. Tim answers immediately, and before you finish telling him what happened, he is in his car and asking for the address of the truck stop. He tells you to stay with Lucy and in the car, for the fifteen minutes it will take him to get there, and he ends the call.
“He said he’ll be here in fifteen,” you tell Lucy.
“That means he’s bringing a shop and acting like it’s a code 3 emergency,” she muses with a smile.
“He treats most things like they are, especially if I’m involved.”
“He loves you,” Lucy says. “A ton.”
Tim’s shop pulls up beside your door, and Tim surveys the area before he gestures for you to open the door.
“Nice job picking a safe location, Lucy,” he says as he hugs you.
“Oh, that wasn’t me.”
Tim winks at you before he rounds the car to pop the hood. You watch him as Lucy tells him what happened. He looks good, you think, though he almost always does. He’s still in civvies, so when he bends over the front of the car, you don’t worry about him messing up his uniform. Lucy chuckles beside you, and you look away from Tim quickly.
“What?” you ask her.
“Nothing, you’re just staring at him. It’s cute, like Sam in Transformers.”
“Wouldn’t that make me the girl?” Tim calls.
“How did he hear that?” you murmur to Lucy.
“I’ve been dating you, my hearing improved,” he jokes as he stands. “Try it now, Lucy.”
Lucy gets in the driver’s seat and turns over the ignition. It shifts smoothly into drive before she places it back in park and thanks Tim from her seat.
“Thank you for coming so quickly,” you say as he closes the hood.
“Of course. I want to follow you for a few minutes to make sure it keeps running okay. It looked like it was just the transmission fluid,” he explains.
“No!” Lucy calls, leaning over the console. “You can’t crash girls’ weekend! You get her all week; I want a turn.”
“I’m not crashing anything, Chen,” he explains, shifting into his grumpy TO voice. “I want to make sure you get to the county line, if that’s okay with you. Or do you want to break down somewhere there isn’t a well-lit truck stop?”
Lucy huffs but waves anyway. Tim kisses your head and opens the passenger door so you can join Lucy. As she pulls out, Tim follows her and stays close as you get farther from LA. Half an hour later, you get a text from Tim that he’s turning back, and you promise to call him if anything else happens. His responding text that he’ll miss your voice makes you look away from your phone like it’s him. Hopefully, he won’t manage to make you shy all weekend from several hundred miles away.
“And we’re free,” Lucy muses as she watches Tim exit in her rearview mirror. “Does he always make you that shy?”
“Usually,” you answer.
“Well, it’s a good thing you have me then. I can protect you from his vicious onslaughts of attention.”
You laugh at Lucy’s phrasing, and then you both yell together when you see a billboard for a homemade candy and ice cream store at the next exit. Despite your delay and Tim temporarily crashing your girls’ weekend, you and Lucy are already having a great time. By the end of your trip, you may have a maid of honor for a wedding you haven’t even thought about.
Bonus:
Tim walks into the bullpen and sighs. He misses you already, and the velvet box hidden in his nightstand has been on his mind more the past few days.
“You miss her,” Angela accuses when she sees him.
“Of course I do, she’s not as annoying as the rest of you,” Tim replies.
“That’s why you started dating a shy girl? So she wouldn’t talk as much as the rest of us? That’s messed up, Timothy.”
“Well, if that's how you feel,” Tim begins before pausing. “I guess I’ll ask someone else to help me plan the proposal.”
“I’m sorry,” Angela says while she reaches out to grab Tim’s sleeve. “Let me help, it will be perfect.”
“We have to one up girls’ weekend,” Tim points out.
“Trust me, we will.”
#tim bradford x reader#tim bradford x y/n#tim bradford x you#tim bradford x fem!reader#tim bradford fic#tim bradford the rookie#tim bradford imagine#tim bradford#tim bradford fluff#the rookie x reader#the rookie abc#fem!reader#requests#hanna writes✯
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streamer!ellie headcanons
warnings: yo no se
content : streamer!ellie headcanons 🔥🔥
authors note : the streets r calling and they’re telling me to write streamer ellie hcs….
- def started off as a faceless streamer. she wasn’t really comfortable on camera, and she just thought it would be way easier. you can only see her shoulders-down leaving her (deliciosu. scrumptious. yummy) arms in the cameras view.
- her twitch user is “creeperewman” cuz shes like…discreetly hiding her initials and referencing the best minecraft parody ever 😕!!!
- bought the most random shitty mic and webcam and started streaming 🔥🔥 she never got rid of either of them its part of her odd loser charm
“‘fartmaster69:it’s probably cuz your camera’ it’s probably bc of YOUR CAMERA!!! theres nothing wrong w my camera bro 😞”
“don’t listen to them…ur perfect 🤫 IM NOT TALKING TO U GUYS IM TALKING TO MY CAMERA”
- only had a few viewers the first couple times she streamed, and it was some random 10 yr old who kept spamming “yassss” in the chat and some dude who said she was shit at minecraft 😞 he was LYING
- started off doing minecraft speed runs (or trying to) and got like way good over time
- she randomly started getting more and more viewers, because people kept posting abt her and calling her fine on tiktok , making edits of her hands and her voice 😭😭 (real)
- as she got more and more viewers, she started branching out more with the games she’d play. def loves shooter games like cod and pubg, but she’d also play like indie horror games like faith (omg markiplier fans would know)
- she has a orange cat she named garfield (cuz…of course she does) and he’s always sitting on her lap during her streams or messing w her setup 💔💔
- def put stickers all over her headset and showed them off all proud on stream
- designed her own cute banners and stuff for streams 😞!!!
- def had a subreddit/disc server with her viewers where she’d let them give her game recs or make memes of her
- ppl saw her guitar in the back of her streams and BEGGED HER to play it and she had her own lil concert stream !!! she was so freaking nervous and messed up a bunch the first like minute or two but like after that she was in the ZONE
“‘ewswife: i wish i was that guitar’ oh!! you guys are so…kind!!!”
- when she INSANELY hit 1k, she did a face reveal and she hit 10k the same day 😦 the amount of edits that ppl made was actually insane. ESP ONES MAKING FUN OF DREAMS FACE REVEALLLL
- started doing much more random shit on stream after she got more famous. she LOVES cooking on stream, and she’d start reacting to random shit ppl sent her on the subreddit
- she cut her hair on stream once, and everyone in the chat kept spamming “yo bob…is fye” for like 5 minutes 😪
- “you’re at work watching me? i hope you get fired. i mean. i hope you don’t get fired 😞”
- she gets so many thirst comments and like…is terrible at responding to them
“‘ewleftbicep: you look so vulnerable today’ WHAT”
- she has her own apartment cuz of her awesome streaming money 🔥🔥🔥 soundproofed walls too cuz she’s. loud.
- one day, you were walking on campus to a class. you had your headphones on, listening to your main playlist on shuffle, when you got stopped by someone. you pulled your headphones off your ears and gave the man in front of you a confused look. you looked down to his hands, holding a tiny mic, and another dude holding a camera.
“what song are you listening to?” he held the microphone towards you, awaiting your response.
you quickly responded “uhm, last goodbye, by jeff buckley.” and stood there awkwardly, pushing a piece of hair out of your face.
the man quickly thanked you and you walked away, slightly suprised.
- after a couple hours, the video had blown up and the comments were filled with people complimenting you.
pickleluna: jeff buckley girl is so fine
minyonlala: 3rd girl is so bad
rilakkila: I NEED JEFF BUCKLEY GIRL
and unknown to you, someone else found you on their fyp.
creeperewman: guys what is the 3rd girls @. im literally BEGGING BRO PLEASEEE
- ewleftbicep: BEING DESPERATE ON MAIN IS CRAZY
- ewsgirlf: random tiktok girl stole my wife 💔
- elliewilliamsidechick: guys im literally the 3rd girl 😂😂😂
- it didn’t take long for your phone to be blown up with people sending you the video, tagging you in funny comments, and finding your instagram. you watched the video, and saw ellie was the top comment. you checked her profile, and saw how FINE she was, and immediately responded
- y/nmainn: guys 😳😳😳 what if i was the third girl 😳😳
- ellie checked her phone and saw thousands of people tagging your comment, and she wasted zero time following you on tiktok. and your instagram. its not stalking if its in your bio, right?
- you two immediately hit it off, and ellie loved the fact that you had absolutely no idea who she was. to you, she was just some hot girl. not some famous streamer you were obsessed with.
- she didn’t even realize you two went to the same school until she saw you in her astrophysics class one day, and she almost had a heart attack when you waved at her and walked over to sit next to her.
“what a coincidence.”
- she took you out on your first date to a planetarium, and not even a week after, asked you to be her girlfriend.
- she definitely teaches you how to play her favorite games. but she gets wayyyy defensive when you beat her.
“im just letting you win.”
“beginners luck.”
but shes SO COCKY when she beats you
“hey, don’t be so hard on yourself after this. not your fault im a professional!”
“aw, maybe one day you’ll be as good as me”
- definitely helps you build your own pc.
- loves watching you play things like animal crossing or stardew valley, always lays on your shoulder while you’re on the couch.
“why are you being so mean to gaston :((“
“because hes UGLY and he has an ugly house and he’s ruining my village.”
“wowww you’re bullying a little bunny man because he doesn’t fit your aesthetic 😒 so mean”
- if you like more aggressive games like cod, she loves listening to you talk shit while you play and always makes fun of people with you. (she thinks its hot when you’re mean to people)
- her chat absolutely loves you, and every time you stream together its a continuous stream of “me and who” and “when is it my turn 😪”
#ellie williams x reader#streamer!ellie#ellie williams x you#ellie x reader#ellie x y/n#ellie x you#ellie tlou#ellie the last of us#ellie williams tlou#ellie williams the last of us#ellie williams fluff#ellie williams fanfic#ellie williams headcanons#tlou#tlou part 2#the last of us#the last of us part 2#tlou fic#tlou fanfiction#tlou headcanons#tlou x reader
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going on a drive with them -- multi .ᐟ.ᐟ
pairing(s)��: bokuto kōtarō, kuroo tetsurō, suna rintarō, sakusa kiyoomi, and kiyoko shimizu x gn!reader (separate!!)
wc : ~200 each .ᐟ
notes//cw : happy 300 posts !! this is me brain dumping bc i haven't posted any writing lately,, food is mentioned in suna's and kuroo's,, they are the ones driving in this hc- let me know if u want a ver. w the reader driving!,, i think that's it tho!! lmk if i missed anything <3
𖥔 oh gosh... a car ride with kōtarō bokuto is never dull.
𖥔 he loves randomly taking you out for drives!!
𖥔 he's gonna keep a hand on you AT ALL TIMES!! like he'll either have it on your leg or you'll both be resting your arms on the compartment between the seats, holding hands.
𖥔 he will BEG you to take the aux cause he loves your music taste <3
𖥔 if he knows the song well enough he will sing along as you two drive!!
𖥔 not simply singing along though...
𖥔 he will lock in and shout out those lyrics, eventually getting you to sing along with him
𖥔 he probably took you out for the drive a bit before the sunset... yes he planned that!! but akaashi suggested the time LMAO
𖥔 when the sun starts to set, you guys drive into an empty area by the side of the road, and you guys get out of the car
𖥔 and he'll get you both up on the roof of the car!! he brought blankets and stuff too
𖥔 the two of you just sit on the roof of the car and watch the sunset together, all huddled up in the blankets he brought <33
𖥔 on the drive back home, you play softer music and yap about your days together :)
𖥔 it's not a drive with tetsurō kuroo unless it's a late night!!
𖥔 he would be trying to fall asleep but fail miserably, resorting to just waking you up 😭
𖥔 "wanna go drive thru somewhere?"
𖥔 you, in a half-awake state mutter an agreement, getting out of bed and into the car
𖥔 he'll hold your hand as you guys drive and you take the aux out of habit
𖥔 it's safe to say you guys end up having a full on karaoke session in the car once you wake up a bit more!!
𖥔 you guys drive through some random 24hr drive thru and pull into the (extremely empty, desolate even) parking lot to eat your food
𖥔 the two of you end up chilling in the car for the rest of the night!! you use your phone and pull up a show the two of you have been watching and you prop it up on the dash of the car LMAOO
𖥔 so the night turns into a binge watching of some tv series accompanied by a drive thru and some karaoke!!
𖥔 "oh my god we have morning classes tomorrow."
𖥔 yeah maybe it wasn't the best idea BUT AT LEAST IT WAS A LOT OF FUN!!
𖥔 you both end up speeding home and knocking out asap in an attempt to get some rest before pounding your head with information right when you wake up
𖥔 yeah... rintarō suna only takes you on late night drives too.
𖥔 he would randomly start spam texting you in the middle of the night saying "let's go to (some 24 hour drive thru)"
𖥔 and you were still awake so why not?
𖥔 he has a DEATHGRIP on having the aux... in the car, don't expect to get the aux unless he's converted you into a severe underground music glazer.
𖥔 he'll be playing the most unknown songs to mankind... but they're honestly pretty good!!
𖥔 it's a pretty chill car ride, honestly
𖥔 you'll be leaning over on his shoulder and just vibing out w the music
𖥔 he'd be telling you about the song and the artist too :))
𖥔 when you're done with that car ride you will have like... 5 new music artists that you like
𖥔 anyway you guys go through the drive thru pretty quick and you head straight home!!
𖥔 once ygs get home you go to his room and continue listening to his playlist and chat while you eat your food <3
𖥔 it ends up becoming a gossip session LMAO
𖥔 ALSO!! you guys pull an all nighter together
𖥔 kiyoomi sakusa took you out for a drive because you weren't able to sleep <3
𖥔 he thought that going for a drive would help to calm your nerves and make you sleepy
𖥔 honestly he was right because he's a really good driver... the ride wasn't bumpy at all!!
𖥔 he holds onto your hand as you guys drive and he lets you use the aux- you opt for calmer music so that he enjoys it too :)
𖥔 he also tells you about his day since he knows you like the sound of his voice
𖥔 just random yapping so that you get to listen to him talk... his voice is so soothing!!!
𖥔 did i mention when he's holding onto your hand he's running his thumb back and forth on the back of your hand
𖥔 he doesn't notice at first when you fall asleep but when he does? he shuts up and and finds himself smiling at how cute you look when you're asleep
𖥔 he drives back home and carries you into the house, putting you into bed before crawling in after you
𖥔 it was a super duper peaceful night <33
𖥔 kiyoko shimizu had a plan before taking you out for a drive!!
𖥔 she didn't tell you anything and was purposely vague about where you would both be going <3
𖥔 LITTLE DID YOU KNOW!!! THE AURORA BOREALIS WAS GOING TO BE VISIBLE THAT NIGHT!!!
𖥔 she took you out for the drive when the sun was setting, and you guys were aimlessly driving around for about an hour while listening to music on the radio <3
𖥔 you guys got to chat a lot during the drive, and for the entirety of that time, she had one of your hands pulled onto her lap as she drove!! <3
𖥔 when the lights were finally showing up in the sky you guys were in a very rural area, just so that you could see it better
𖥔 the two of you sat on the hood of the car and watch the lights until they went away <3
𖥔 and!!! you guys were cuddled up and sharing a blanket that she always keeps in the back seat of her car for you :)
𖥔 you took a bunch of pictures of the lights- mostly her, but also a couple of the lights-
𖥔 while you guys were watching the lights, you ended up talking about your plans for the future and how she was a part of them <3
𖥔 it was a very soft night for you guys!!
notes ::
okay i kept giggling while i wrote this
i love hcs because you dont have to expand on them its just what it is
happy 300 posts!! (im not even at 100 followers yet BYE IM A SPAM POSTER!! I CANT HELP IT!!)
if you enjoyed this, please consider checking out my masterlist!
and following maybe 😋
btw requests are always welcome!! id love to write stuff for you guys <3
have a lovely morning/afternoon/night!!
🏷️ :: @bokukos + @iiwaijime <3 (i just realized i messed up your user... sorry alina!! 😭)
#dividers by @/plutism#haikyuu#haikyuu x reader#hq x reader#haikyuu imagines#hq imagines#haikyuu bokuto#haikyuu kuroo#haikyuu suna#haikyuu sakusa#haikyuu kiyoko#bokuto x reader#kuroo tetsuro x reader#suna x reader#sakusa x reader#kiyoko x reader#bokuto koutarou#kuroo tetsurou#rintarou suna#sakusa kiyoomi#kiyoko shimizu#omori's sketchbook.
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Omg omg omg i have an idea
r is the team baby and mapi is like a big sister to her
it’s gameday and mapi always braids readers hair before a match, but with mapis injury, she can’t do it. So Aitana takes the role of being your big sister and helps you with everything,
Changes
Barcelona Femení x reader request
-> With Mapi injured, your usual plan gets changed
-> Very short! I hope you like it - was very fun to throw something quick and small together
-> Little pt.2 - On the Road
➳ Masterlist
•─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────•
It was weird.
Ever since joining the team last season, Mapi had been a constant in your everyday life, and one day to the next, she was gone. She didn’t die, duh, but she was injured. And while a lot of people on the team injured themselves or sometimes just had to sit out – never Mapi.
She had taken you under her wing as soon as she saw you, but her plan of making you her accomplice didn’t work, as you were much too introverted to embarrass yourself in public like she intended to do.
Ingrid had always just scoffed at her girlfriend whenever she had sent you on a wild goose chase for something completely made up, while Maria would laugh at you. The Norwegian was always quick to solve the mysteries, pressing soft kisses on your forehead whenever you got annoyed, ignoring her girlfriend until she stopped.
While everyone on the team was great friends, even a family, the relationship between you and Mapi was just different and everybody knew that – which is also why everybody could see just how much it affected you that your favorite defender wasn’t there. Especially when you were in the starting eleven.
Ingrid had religiously been updating her girlfriend, reassuring her that you were in fact totally fine and not freaking out. But you weren’t fine.
The girls tried to help where they could – Lucy and Keira had picked you up from home, Pina sat next to you on the bus (Patri and Ona behind you, making for a very funny ride), Jana and Bruna had made you a new playlist that you were all listening to and Alexia did what she did best – she observed and helped when needed.
In the changing room, most things took their natural course as every girl had their slightly different routine and needs before a game.
You were so incredibly nervous. Making the starting eleven was big, especially for a club like Barcelona, but the team for the day was quite experienced, calming you down just a little. Esme looked just as nervous as you, she was a striker alongside you, making for a very young frontline.
Aitana saw you brushing your hair again and again and again, just to do absolutely nothing with it, just patting your own head in a calming manner. After three minutes she took pity – remembering that your older sister figure wasn’t there.
“No need to rip out hair Cari. Let me do it.”
The entire team had affectionally started to call you Cari in your first season – it was short for cariño, and you loved it.
As still as humanly possible you sat in your cubby, letting the ballon d'or winner do her thing, sometimes handing her a brush, a ponytail holder, or a bobby pin.
“I can’t do it like Maria, so I did something else. Do you like it, Cari?” She indeed had done a different hairstyle, but it was still braided out of your face and it looked cute.
“It’s perfect Tana, thank you!” The brunette couldn’t help but smile, seeing you come to life just a little more after such a simple action from her. In thanks you kissed her cheek, squeaking when Sandra poked you into your side, making all three of you laugh.
“Let me help you with your shirt.” The goalkeeper didn’t even wait for an answer, helping you tuck your shirt inside of the shorts – just like Mapi would do for you. “Thank you!”
Now you felt much more prepared and ready to take on FC Rosengård.
Walking in, instead of a mascot's hands you were holding Lucy’s who smiled at you so brightly that you couldn’t be sad anymore. “You’ll do her proud kid – don’t worry.”
The Brit had indeed been right. Mapi had been close to tears sitting next to Frido in the stands, as you scored an amazing goal in the second half, dedicating it to her, as you sprinted over to where they sat, pressing a kiss to your palm, and practically throwing it at her.
“Look at my sister!”
#woso x reader#woso imagine#woso#woso imagines#barca femeni#barca femeni x reader#barcelona femeni x reader#aitana bonmati#aitana bonmati x reader
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Loosen Your Grip. | R & D
logline; even when it seems counter-intuitive.
[!!!] series history; so many parts, so many words.
Spotify Playlist, if you like to listen while you read. I listen to it when I write :) Constantly gettin’ added to. 8 hour mark officially! Lets go!
portion; 15k knowing the next chapters, this trend isn't going to change. they have started to line up with the chapter number, to my chagrin.
possible allergies; i think this one is relatively harmless? Stress though. Everyone's stressed. Idk what to tell you man, it's the bear. oh but more things were yoinked from Season 3!! Think that's just gonna be ongoing tbh. also if this is bad don't tell me. tell me it's really good, actually. i've never doubted a chapter more than I do this one.
pairing; Carmen ‘Carmy’ Berzatto & Fem Reader it's so fem. it's so she/her'd it's so girl'd i'm so sorry
kofi; if you’ve enjoyed the series, perhaps you wanna tip!
i'm so sorry for the delays beloveds, can you say 'most high stress but high reward month and a half of my life'? i can!!!
The Monday morning after New York— The first morning waking up in your own bed in a day or two— Comes rudely. Well, not immediately. First you have to roll over and grab aimlessly at your nightstand, searching for your phone to turn off your alarm. Through blurred vision you slide it to snooze, and as you debate going back to bed, your eyes glaze over some texts you’ve received in your sleep, from numbers you never bothered to put in your contacts. It takes a minute to absorb the information and register it as real, but once you do—
“...Are you fucking kidding me?!”
—You’re definitely not gonna be heading back to bed anymore. You’re wide-eyed and wired— You can probably skip coffee this morning. Maybe every morning forever.
“Oh— I fucking hate this fucking city, I fucking hate Chicago— Fuck this!”
In lieu of coming to terms with your world shattering news, perhaps this is an important moment to express gratitude, for the things that have gone well in the past few days.
The rest of the weekend in New York was as lovely as a last-minute trip in a cramped car full of kitchen equipment and four neurotics can be.
Gratitude. Highlight reel?
There’s a bag M and Ms monogrammed with Syd’s, Richie’s, Carmy’s, and your faces in your pantry now. Eva shouldn’t be the only one allowed to have fun. Though snacking on all your cute little faces does make you feel like a slight monster.
Managed to get a good gift for Richie. Thank you Tiffanys. It was certainly an interesting moment when everyone tried to come up with lame excuses as to why they had to split up from the group to definitely totally not go get Christmas presents.
Carmen’s knife guy wasn’t able to do engravings on such short notice, and you’re not the type to settle for less, especially not with Syd, so that’ll be a next year gift, it seems. You came up with a serviceable back-up while strolling through the MET— Which was a mostly fun field trip, it was very inspiring. You all could've done without Richie's pretentious prattling about postmodern absurdist dadaism. Mostly because you're pretty sure half of it was wrong; but still a good trip, all told.
Still lost on what to get Carmen… You’ve got a week, it’s fine. You’ve done more with less before. How do you subtly ask a guy, ‘hey, what the hell else do you like besides your job?’ You’ll figure it out. Figure it out like you figure out everything else, like you always do. Hopefully.
It's Monday. You've got a week. It's fine. Stop looking at your phone. This is such bad timing. This is awful fucking timing. You’ll figure it out. Stop looking at your phone, stop looking at the texts. Do the Connections, send it to Carmy, he already sent his, be normal… Just such bad timing—
At the very least if you can't bear to look away from the life ruining texts, just shut your phone off. You’ve got to stop ruminating or you’ll rot in bed forever. And you really have to get out on time, today.
“God wants me to kill myself—” Gratitude. Express gratitude.
The drive back went ‘well’. Everyone had their licenses so the squad took shifts either driving or sitting on the uncomfortable console. Or, in your case specifically, sitting half on Carmen’s lap in shotgun on occasion despite the many complaints from Syd and Richie. You had a good excuse! Neither of you slept for the entire trip just to work on the cocktail and coffee menu. It was practically a sacrifice! It was just easier to sit up front together, okay!? You had to be close, you were scribbling ratios and drawings of glasses into a stolen notepad from the Holiday Inn with pencil crayons bought from FAO Schwarz—
Oh, hey, put that on the gratitude scoreboard, that was another thing that went well. Pretty cool to go to the oldest toy store in America. Might not have gotten the chef in your life anything yet, but the kids in your life are covered— You’re winning best Aunt for sure.
Oh, huge highlight— Didn’t say love you, like some idiot. Got away with that by the skin of your teeth, honestly. Hard to stare up at the Rockefeller Christmas Tree next to the guy and not blurt out something fucking stupid. Thank God for Syd, who stomped on your foot when you seemed a little too doe eyed.
With great pain and bemoaning, you finish expressing gratitude, which hasn’t helped much. You slam your phone screen down on your nightstand and roll out of bed.
Today’s Monday. Today’s your first day at The Bear. Today that is the priority and there is nothing else to worry about.
You signed your contract last night. Talked to Syd for hours about it, planning next steps and goals and classes and budgets and a million other things. You’re both a little easily excitable, when it comes to lists and plans. Watching you sign yours gave her the ‘confidence’ to sign hers, if you can call it that. Not like you knew she needed the help, though.
“I love my life, I love my life, I love my life…” If you keep saying it while washing your face in the bathroom, it’ll become true, right? …Where’s Sara’s card again?
The Bear doesn’t run service on Mondays, so it’s a good day to do onboarding— Good day to do R and D. …What does one wear to R and D? Don’t need the serving uniform. Don’t need to dress up. Don’t need the jumpsuit… This is the first time you don’t need a uniform and that is bizarre.
You’ll wear your dad’s flannel, at least. Feels illegal to not wear the patch worked flannel. But besides that, you’re just a normal… restaurateur… part of the team…
Your hand hovers over where your necklace sits, in the small jewellery box on your vanity. “Mikey, if you want me to keep wearing it, make my ceiling cave in or some shit.”
You give it ten seconds and nothing falls. With a curt nod to no one, you pick up your book bag filled with loose tools and the menu filled notepad. Leave your bedroom, put your shoes on, grab your keys out of your clay dish tray on the way out.
It’s snowing.
That’s a lot of stuff falling, so to speak.
That’s basically a sign. That’s basically what you asked for.
You head back in, grab the necklace, hook it over your neck, and tuck it under your shirt. Baby steps. You head back out.
…And then soon after, head back in— Forgetting one of the most important things you need today. “The fucking glass, goddamn it!”
There’s a chance that today might be a little bit of an off day for you. No one’s gonna notice that, though.
“Mikey, why didn’t you tell me? You want me to look stupid on my start day, don't you? Fucker.”
You’re good. You’re you. You figure shit out. You’re compartmentalising perfectly and no one’s gonna be able to tell that you’re internally scrambling to figure out where you're gonna live once your lease gets terminated.
“ ‘Sup with you?” Okay, so Tina did immediately notice upon opening the back door for you. She tries to help you with the huge sheet of plexiglass you’re carrying, but you wave her off, stumbling further inside The Bear. Thankfully it’s a slow start to the morning, so the walk way is clear for your fumbled steps.
“I got it, T, just spot me—”
“Woahwoahwoah—” But alas, immediately Carmen is rushing over, making a big deal over nothing, “Fuck are you doin?” And grabs the thick sheet of glass from you. “Wait by your car next time, why do I gotta keep tellin’ you?”
“I am very capable—” You grunt, but you’re relieved when he takes the weight off you. You nod to the table in front of expo. “Put it on the island.”
“What’s it for?” Carmy asks but he follows direction without hesitation.
“Syd’s idea.” You walk with him, sidling up to Syd who’s already stationed up on the island with what looks like way too much paperwork for Chefs. You bump her shoulder as a greeting, she bumps you back. She lifts up the stack of papers and you pick up her deli container of Coke and ice, letting Carmen slide the glass onto the table.
“Unless it’s bad—” You correct, putting the cup down and digging through the tool bag on your shoulder for the right parts. “If you hate it, then it’s my idea.”
Syd snorts next to you, putting the papers back down on top of the glass. “Nice save.”
“What’s your idea, Chef?” Carmen taps his fingers against the glass, bemused.
You finally fish out two lock hinges from your bag, gesturing to them with a little flair like you’re Vanna White as Sydney explains. “For R and D. Thought since we’re like— Constantly changing shit and needing to review, it’d be like, useful to have a whiteboard— But those are huge and inconvenient for a restaurant— Duh— So—”
“Glass!” You come in with the assist as she rambles on. “On hinges— These one’s lock so you can have the glass sort of tilted up like an easel, or on the station— And then when you start service you can just flip it down off the counter for the night. Easy!”
“And—And—” Like a TV ad, Syd points out, “We can put paper under it and still be able to see— So it’ll make editing clearer— I-I think.”
Carmen always takes a nerve-wracking amount of time to think through other’s ideas, but once he nods, you both breathe easy. “Smart idea. Thank you, Chefs.”
You just smile, and this seems to bother Carm. Or at the very least, something is bothering him, as he frowns. “You got a second?”
Your brows furrow, for a moment, worried. You nod, putting your tools down. Glass can wait. “Always.”
Carmen comes around the counter, before he pulls you aside, Syd whispers over your shoulder, “Trouble in paradise.” Making you snort. When has it ever been paradise?
The two of you lean across from each other in the doorway of Carmen’s office, not quite in, not quite out. He looks worried, and his worrying is making you worry. He’s first to say something, concerned hand on your shoulder.
“Are you good?”
Fuck, he caught you too? “Hmm? Yeah, I’m good, do I not—”
You’re halfway through your response when he interrupts, he seems even more panicked by your words. His hand abandons your shoulder. “Right— Stupid, stupid fucking question— I just— Sorry—”
“Woah—” You grip both his shoulders, rubbing down his sleeves lightly. “Are you good, Carmy? You’re right, sweets. You caught me. I’m a lil’ off today. What gave me away?”
“Right, yes— You’re nice.” He’s saying it more to himself than you, like he needs to remind himself. Even so, it still hitches your heartbeat. “I— I’m good, I was just—You didn’t text me back this morning.”
“Oh.” You say it so breathlessly, with relief. It’s cute that that’s what’s got him freaking. “Sorry, yeah, I’ve been trying to not look at my phone, I just got some…” You shake your hand in the air for effect. “Bleh news. Put a wrench in some things for me, that’s all.”
“Yeah? What’s up?”
“Ah—” You shake your head, waving it off, “Too much to get into. Later, though?”
“Yeah, yeah. Whenever you want.” He nods. “Ah, I wanna get into uhm—” Carmen snaps his fingers a few times, finding the words. “Get into drinks, today. I made all the concentrates and syrups ahead of time—But Uncles gonna come in first with The Computer to go over some numbers shit— Should be here in thirty?”
You nod, squinting. “Is it like… A special computer or something?”
“Computer is a guy.” Carmen says, while Syd yells the same in tandem with him, “Why wouldn’t he be!?” Walking past you both as she carries produce out of the walk-in.
“Why wouldn’t he be?” You grin, reiterating. Your smile soon sobers though, as you finally notice a giant silver blob of machinery behind Carmen. “Baby, what the fuck is that?”
You’re already walking past him, quickly winding up all over again. It’s a gorgeous espresso machine— “It’s an Ascaso.” Explains Carmen. “It’s the best.” And it’s sitting exactly where your beautiful beat up mistake of a heavily-stained coffee machine used to be.
“Baby, baby, baby—” you’re looking above and below the station for your rusted companion, hushed and panicked. “Don’t tell me you threw away the old one—”
“You want the old one?”
Richie’s timing is perfect, as he walks in from front of house, and even from just hearing the last sentence, “Fuckin’ told you, Carm.” He knows the context. He keeps walking— On a mission, seemingly.
“I’m grateful— I- I am.” You kneel down and shove some mixing bowls aside to see if it was tucked in the back of some shelf— It’s not here. She’s not here. “New is good— New is nice— I’ll learn how to use the new one— I will— But— I— I need the old one— You didn’t throw it away, did you?”
When he stays silent, you turn and look up to Carmen from where you’re crouched on the ground, pleading. “Tell me you didn’t.”
“I— I—” The Chef is nearly sweating from this line of questioning alone. “It— It barely worked—”
“I know it didn’t! That’s the point!”
He blinks. You just seem to be saying all his trigger phrases, today, huh? “That’s the point?”
“I knew how she worked.” You push yourself back up onto your feet. “It’s got an espresso function that doesn’t work, if you tamp the basket the basket literally breaks off so you have to hold it and burn your hand a little— You have to hold the hot water button at the same time as the grind button for some reason or it won’t dispense— It’s literally a fucking nightmare— I covered it in like ten sticky notes of instructions at one point and they became pointless because no one but me was willing to use it. And— And I’ve got it memorized.”
“...And you want that?”
“No one’s gonna know how to take care of her, she’s my baby!” You gesture, albeit a bit too dramatically, speaking with your hands. “If you throw her away or donate her, no one’s gonna take the time to figure it out— They’re just gonna think she’s broken but she’s not, she works! She just needs the right hand!”
A dull silence falls between you, as Carmen purses his lips, squinting. There’s an ever slight chance your ‘I’m totally fine’ facade is cracking. “...Are you sure you don’t want to talk about your thing right—”
“I’m good!” “...Okay.” “Did you get rid of her?”
“Relax, Handy!” Carmen does not say this.
You grimace, looking behind Carmen to see Chi-Chi yelling from around the bend, in The Beef’s corner territory. Looking over him with the blue apron calling you your least favourite nickname by far— Well, second least favourite, only to— “She’s over here, Jack-Off. More our speed than rich boy’s ack - queso bullshit…” It’s nostalgic. Bad nostalgic but nostalgic.
He slaps the top of the machine, you and Carmen both wince as a random spigot falls off it. Chi-Chi clicks his tongue, staring at it in silence. “...Refresher would be good, though.”
You’re already walking back to your damaged darling, patting Carmen on the shoulder as a form of goodbye, he pats your hand back. You don’t get to see him smile, as he watches you get to work. “Don’t fuckin’ call me Jack-Off and don’t touch her, I’ll show you, I’ll break your hand Cheech, I swear—”
The man in question shrugs, a devilish and terrible smirk on his stupid face. “Ey, love a woman in charge. Show me the ways.”
Even on your most off days, working with The Beef will always be second nature for you. Even when the space is significantly more cramped than it used to be.
You rewrite directions on how to use the coffee machine while showing them to Ebra and Chi-Chi. Ebra tends not to learn new tricks, so he stops listening by the time you get to syrups. That’s fine. No one ordered syrups in their coffee at The Beef back in the day all that often either.
Mikey really shouldn’t have invested in all those syrups back then. He really only did it for you and the staff. To be fair, when he did convince regulars to try your coffee they always changed their tune. The people don’t know what they like yet. They will like this. You were his proof that that idea was true.
“You gotta toss these, Boss. Slows you down.” You overhear Cheech saying behind you. You turn to see his arm on Ebra’s shoulder, holding the small blue baskets for sandwiches in his other hand. “Just the wrapping is fine. These people are gonna throw this shit out anyways, waste of plastic.”
Cheech turns his head to you, “Right, Handy?”
“...Don’t call me Handy.” Don’t freak out about throwing the old stuff away. Don’t freak out about throwing his old stuff away. You shrug, looking at Ebra over your shoulder. “Maybe just offer them, if they ask for one?”
“Y’know what the people are asking for, babe?” Cheech sucks his teeth, pulling Ebra closer, who looks nonplussed. “They’re asking where the nearest brick is to throw through our window. This rich people shit is getting on their nerves.”
You sigh, eyes flitting to Ebra for confirmation. “Yeah?”
He shrugs, nodding. “Ninety-eight percent, Jack-Off.” Cheech and the gang have been a terrible influence. How are you going to undo this?
“C’mon, E…” You scoff, but nod as you turn around, arms crossed. Gesturing with the frother as you do. “Well, I’ll make note of that. Now back to the fuckin’ hand frother, Cheech?”
“I know how to crank it, Handy—” “I swear to fucking God—”
“Ey!” Tina comes up to your corner, smacking the back of Chi-Chi’s head with a hand towel when she does. “Don’t talk to the baby like that, clean your mouth.”
He puts one hand on the back of his head, hissing, and another up in front of him, in defense. “Ey, T, it’s all love, aright? Playing!”
“Yeah well, you’re not gonna wanna play wit’ this one. ‘Specially not now—” She nudges you, smiling that coy ‘I’m about to blow up your spot’ smile.
You grimace, attempting to interrupt her. “T, don’t—” “That she’s Jeff’s.” “—Goddamnit.”
“Oh! Oh shit!” Cheech laughs, delightfully shocked. “You finally closed on Charmin’? Congrats—” It’s a blessing and a curse that Carmen, the guy you only ever saw in photos and heard in stories that you had a very minor and not vocal crush on, is now your… boyfriend? Undetermined.
You wave a hand in his face, “Shut the fuck up—”
“So where should I send flowers?”
You hate this family. “For the record, I have not closed shit.”
“What’s closing?” Tina takes a half step back, surveying your face, it doesn’t reveal anything. “What’s that? Gramps?” She turns her question on Ebra, who shrugs, equally as old and unknowing.
“Well Jack-Off’s a little Mother Mary for my taste—”
You scoff, “So not true, for the record—” but Chi-Chi continues his tirade. “So I suspect she just means they haven't had the ‘are we datey-wating carmy baby?’ talk.”
You all but growl, crossing your arms as you wait for the second tutorial coffee to finish dispensing from the beloved whirring machine behind you. You can get the fuck out of here as soon as it’s done, and you’re praying that’s soon, because this interrogation is about to turn terrible. “We are currently unlabelled, if that’s what you’re trying to say.”
Tina kisses her teeth, poking at your shoulder. “Richie told me you spent the whole wedding together and you come back with no label?”
You sigh, composure falling apart. You are not ready for a mother’s disappointment. “We talked out a lot of important stuff—” “Mija, that is important stuff!”
“I just— We’ll talk eventually—”
Chi-Chi conveniently interrupts you when it looks like Tina’s about to go off into a full rant on the downfall of romance in modern relationships. “So you’re still on the market, Handy?”
“For you?” You smile, then drop it. Pushing your hand against his forehead. “Never. Now froth the fucking milk.”
He mumbles an endless series of expletives, but gets to work. You give him a quick tutorial on the hand frother— You fought hard for the old machine, but you are overjoyed to see an automated steamer and frother on that Ascaso. That part is gonna be a dream. You can make so many new drinks for Carm— The menu.
When you finish, you take the latte from Cheech to hand to Tina; and when you do, you catch her looking… off. She’s staring at the piled up diner baskets, next to the unused napkin dispensers.
You put your hand on her shoulder, massaging it lightly. “You good, T?”
Your hand shocks her back into reality, “Yeah, yeah, I’m good, baby.” It takes her a second to remember where she is. She takes the latte, nodding. “I’m good. You good?”
“I’ve got my complaints.” You shrug. “But nothing I won’t survive.” Probably.
Tina takes a sip of her coffee, continuing to nod. She wants to dig deeper into your thing, you want to dig deeper into hers, but the painful groaning from the front of the kitchen, “And when did I fuckin’ greenlight this?” interrupts both your trains of thought. Uncle Jimmy tends to have that effect.
With a knowing nod, you walk together to the front, leaving Ebra and Cheech to continue experimenting with the coffee machine before they open their side of the restaurant.
You watch from the sidelines as Carmen defends his choices, “The old one was shit, she was burning her hands on it. She’ll need the three groups to keep up.” and you’re able to quickly glean they’re talking about the new espresso machine.
“Okay, I hear that,” Jimmy nods, “but why the fuck did it need to be ten grand?”
“Ten?!” You can’t help but shout, you slap your hand over your mouth. Budget is none of your business. But fucking ten? You part your fingers to mumble through your hand, “Sorry, continue.”
Carmen cares too much about your drink menu. Berzattos tend to invest too much into your special interests. Though this time, instead of syrups, and in addition to a 10k coffee machine, you see on the stainless steel table your shared sketches laid out alongside all the ingredients needed– Including the concentrates, whips, and other compounds Carmen made ahead of time for you. He’s so sweet. God, you love him. God, that’s disgusting. They have all, of course, been haphazardly shoved aside though, to make room for The Computer’s— Computer. Carmy’s nonplussed by that fact, it seems.
Jimmy gestures to you, deadpanning to Carm. “See, Chip understands the power of the dollar.”
“I’m not involved.” You add, waving your hand, it’s a terrible moment for your favouritism to shine through. Though you do enter the radius of this trainwreck of a quarterly review, kneeling down by the kitchen island to finish what you started with the plexiglass and hinges. “Ignore me, continue.”
The men stand on either side of you, as you bolt down the hinges. Carmen brushes off the dollar comment with a simple, “It’s the best.”
Why do you need the best? You think; Jimmy concurs with your brain, speaking for both of you. “Why do you need the best?”
The question seems to make no sense to Carmen. He freezes, blue-screening. “Cause—”
You duck your head under the counter at just the right moment— Or just the wrong moment? Because you don’t get to see Carmen looking down at you, then back up at his uncle. “Because.”
You don’t see Uncle Jimmy practically roll not just his eyes but his entire body back into himself, witnessing the puppy love that is going to ruin his credit score. “Chip…”
When you slide yourself out from under the counter, Carmen puts his hand on the edge of the counter to make sure you don’t hit your head— Because you have an awful tendency to do so. You’re too focused on the way Uncle Jimmy says your name like you’re in trouble to notice though. “What’d I do?”
“You’re you.” Jimmy grimaces, shaking his head. It’s not your fault. Not completely. “F-Y-I– Your boss just cut your bar budget by ten grand.”
“Hm.” You squint, lips in a line. “And what do I do if the budget I was planning was just ten grand?”
“Well respect yourself more than that.” Cicero scoffs, arms crossed. “Take twenty, now you’re back to ten. You’re welcome.”
“Generosity knows no bounds.” You shake your head, laughing him off as you duck your head back under the counter. “Thank you, Unc.”
“Sorry, who exactly are we giving twenty thousand?”
“Oh fuck—” Despite Carmen’s best efforts, you still manage to bump your head on the roof of the counter, alarmed by the new voice— The Computer, you assume. “Fuckin—Ow— Sorry! Y’know what, hol’ on, let me just finish up here—”
“It’s the drink budget. Tony’s the new mixologist.” Natalie answers for you. “And sommelier.”
“Ah,” hums The Computer. “She’s the one we’re paying Quarter-Master for?”
“Nah, that’s me.” Gary strolls by, calling out to wherever his manager has gone, “Richie, you find that book yet?!”
“I’m taking them too!” You finally pop your head out from underneath the counter, finished bolting in the hinges. “Apparently I need actual W-S-E-T certification and a bunch of memorized google searches, youtube videos, and wine review blogs do not legally make you a sommelier.”
“I think it’s impressive you made it this far on basically nothing.” Syd taps the top of your head, she’s the one who made the call on schooling. She looks to her co-owner. “Classes are coming out of the advanced.”
“So is this.” You tap the plexiglass, nodding up to Carmen as well. “You’re workin’ with like… A thousand left for pre-paid work?”
“Hm.” Carmen nods, looking at The Computer, and you turn your head to him too. “Did you account for that?”
“Did I account for a thousand dollars?”
Carmen shakes his head like a white flag immediately, hearing the sarcastic tone, “Alright, you don’t—”
“A thousand dollars does not take you out of the hole, man.” He’s right, but you don’t love the tone. He tilts his head, reading something off his screen. “Payroll is a little high, for a somme.”
“I don’t disagree—” You try to say, because yeah, your contract does have a weirdly high salary.
But Jimmy, Nat, and Carm all speak over you. “It’s not.”
“That’s not pay for a somme, that’s a pay for Chip, you don’t need to enhance on that.” Jimmy deads the topic then and there. “You’ll see. Just trust me. You were sayin’ somethin about tiny plants?”
“Microgreens.” Says Syd.
“Yes. Do less of that.”
And you just watch, from the sidelines, as this crew flows into a bit of a repetitive we’re doing this, which gains the response, well stop. Do less, charge more, figure it out, duh, don’t duh– What’s that you’re hearing about a daily changing menu? Carmen seems to be the only one campaigning for it. At a point he just starts pacing, pointing at numbers on The Computer’s screen that he doesn’t understand but pretends he does.
You’ve got a million ideas, but it’s none of your business. It very literally isn’t your business, until Jimmy turns his head just so, grimacing at the non stop debate, to see you standing aside, arms crossed.
He sighs, beckoning you to the table, like it’s a witness stand. “What’s that fuckin’ face on your face, kid?” Oh, for the love of God, why are you so easy to read?
You pfft, shrugging. “I’m not makin’ a face—!” But you come forward nonetheless as he boldly speaks over you.
“You’re makin’ a face,” — “This is just what I look like,” — “Y’know how I know you’re makin’ a face?” — “Enlighten me.” — “Cause it’s the same fuckin’ face—”
He takes this moment to point at the face on your face. “That your dad makes.” A man that gambles as well as Cicero is a man that knows your dad’s tells. And a man that knows your dad’s tells is a man that knows your tells.
You bite down on your inner cheek, poorly pretending to be confused, shrugging again, “I dunno what you’re talking about.”
“Come off it.” “I’m not on anything, Unc—” “You’ve got a problem, say it.”
“I don’t have a problem!” You have a lot of problems, but they can’t know that. That makes you judgy and pushy— You don’t know enough about the business to have an opinion. “I’m just observing, that’s all.”
Uncle looks up, to Heaven, to Mikey, and sighs the world’s heaviest sigh. It sounds painful. When he finally tilts his head back down to you, it’s to say, “C-K.”
“Cicero.”
“Y’know why I’m able to pour mas queso into this fuckin’ kid?” He loosely gestures in the direction of Carmen, who in response seems to bite down a lot of venom. It’s bad to think he’s pretty when he’s annoyed, isn’t it?
You tilt your head, “Honestly, I always assumed some sort of mob association.”
Jimmy holds back his laughter, it comes out as a disgruntled cough. He shrugs. “It’s because when I saw your dad at the table, makin’” —He gestures to you— “That fuckin’ face, I knew to pull back.”
“You don’t need to pull back.” Your reply is a touch too panicked and instant for anyone’s liking, makes it a little less believable. But Cicero smirks, and you know that face as well as he knows yours. Check. He’s got you.
“Then speak on it.” And he pushes you forward, just slightly, like a slap of support on your back. You grimace, looking to Carm and Syd for permission to have opinions, and they both nod, like it’s obvious. With great hesitation, lips pressed together, you finally allow yourself to come off as judgy, opinionated, a fixer.
“I think the chargers are kinda stupid.”
A plate no one eats off of, that they still have to clean, that’s on top of another plate? Definitely super necessary. Definitely not some rich people NOMA bullshit.
You look to Syd, apologetic. She shrugs, open mouthed, head tilted, “I– I mean, I didn’t invent them.”
“It’s presentation.” Carmen nods, to himself. He doesn’t like to budge. “That first look at the table affects everything.”
“Yes.” You nod, directly across the counter from him. “I agree, I just think the plates are stupid.”
“You got somethin’ better?”
“Think so.” You hum, tilting your body back to yell to the back of the restaurant. “Ay, Cheech! Pass me a fuckin’ basket!”
It’s without hesitation that you hear, “Hut!” before even seeing the man. You see the blue basket being hurled towards you before you see the man. You catch it, albeit a bit clumsy, but you catch it.
You toss the basket on the table. Everyone stares. You defend yourself before anyone even criticizes it, “Easier to clean than plates, because you just need to rinse the plastic. Ties together a colour scheme, costs nothing, they’re gonna be tossed anyways.”
“It looks cheap.” Carmen tuts, but he really does seem to be trying to hear out the idea, despite his reservations.
“It looks purposeful.” You double down, leaning on the counter just so, “It carries a story, that we didn’t forget where we started.”
“Ooh.” Marcus, clocking in just in time, hums behind you. “Kind of a bar, Chef.”
“Thank you, Chef. Morning, Chef.” You fist bump him over your shoulder, not looking. Too focused on convincing the man before you, you let him think in silence for some time before asking. “Think on it?”
“No.” Carmen shakes his head, and you’re a little crestfallen, for a second. “It’s good. Let’s do the baskets, yeah—” He then remembers to ask for permission, he turns his head to Syd, “Yeah?”
“Yeah? Oh, uh. Yeah. Yeah. Baskets are good.” Syd nods to Nat. “Can you look into, uh—”
“Returning the expensive as fuck earthenware shit? Happily.” Nat is far too cheery upon receiving a paperwork rabbit hole of a mission. She brushes past you, excitedly whispering, “Please keep going.”
“Oh, uh—” Are you some sort of thought leader now? “Well, uhm, I think I heard you sayin’” —You snap your fingers at The Computer, “That R and D cost is a little high?”
“A lot high.” He corrects.
“Kid with crayons.” Jimmy tuts, “Need to pull back a little.”
Carmen’s screwing and unscrewing the cap of a mason jar— Marmalade, it’s for Syd’s drink. He made it this morning, it’s labelled down to the minute. Just let him work on his fucking drinks menu, please God. He’s been dying for this moment and it’s being thrown off by this bullshit.
He can’t keep biting his tongue, “Hey, uh, why don’t you just tell us to do everything a little bit less so we can skip this and get back to work, huh?”
You hear Uncle Jimmy inhale as preparation to verbally beat Carmen’s ass. You put one hand up in front of the old man’s face, the other hand grabs a dry-erase marker. “He didn’t mean it like that and he apologizes, Unc.”
“Does he now?”
“He does.” You drop your hand, focusing on lifting the glass panel, clicking the locks in place to keep it up. You nod to Carmen through the pane. “Right, Carmy?”
Poor Carmen nearly deflates, “...I’m tryna be the guy.”
“Not what the guy does, baby boy.” You hum, uncapping the marker with your teeth. You turn your head to Cicero. “Guy had a lapse, he forgot you were his boss and just thought of you as family, so he spoke to you like family, cause he loves you, Unc.”
Cicero nods, tilting his head just so at Carmen. “S’that right?”
Carm manages to shake his head and nod all at the same time, “S’a facet.”
“....Well, just don’t do it again.” A crisis is averted and an uncle is softened.
“I love to see a family come together.” You hum, nonchalant, writing on the glass, ‘R & D - Cost: Bad’
“Bring it from bad to good.” The Computer notes very helpfully. “You can cut—”
“Hol’ on.” You put your index finger up, effectively shushing him, “Just think about it first. We don’t have to go straight to cutting. Let’s look at our options.”
“Your options are fucked.”
“Just—” You tut, rubbing the bridge of your nose, man, you really are becoming your dad right now. Loosen your grip, Jack. “Widen the scope. We cut costs through returning those chargers— How else can we ‘return’ shit? Carmy?”
Thank God you’re the guy, because Carm can’t hack it. “Heard? Yes?” And frankly, he doesn’t want to.
“What’s the main cost on R and D?”
“Supplies. Food— Y’know, lot of trial and error.” He nods to a bus tub filled with failed attempts over this morning’s session. But you like that, right? “Trying new things, y’know?”
“...Carmen.” He doesn’t answer, because he can hear he’s in trouble. He is staring at you stare at the tub in what seems like a sort of contemplative, serene, searing anger. “Sweetheart, are those four wagyu filets in a fuckin’ bus tub?”
“Yes, it’s got a blood orange reduction, but– But Syd suggested mint—”
You don’t let him finish, “Is it poison?”
“It’s not.” “It’s edible?” “It is.” “Okay, so then, babydoll, why is it not being eaten?”
Syd winces from the sidelines, hissing under her breath, fist over her mouth. Carmen cannot help but notice. You’re perhaps… a dash upset.
“We can’t eat everything.” “Did you offer it to the crew?” “Yeah—” “You offered it to Nat, Unc, Cheech— All the servers? Or did you just offer it to the cooks?” “...Heard.” “Did you take a bite of all of these?” “Not all.”
You start writing on the glass again, explaining as you do, “Okay. So then uneaten food from R and D should be sold on one of those fuckin’ food waste apps— Too Good to Go, or somethin’. We advertise it to The Beef regulars, try to get the other side of our city to understand the finer things, prevent any brick through window incidents, how we feel ‘bout that?”
You remember small things far too well. You did make note of the rich people shit getting on The Beef customers' nerves. You make note of the people who live on your block, who cannot afford to eat here. You make note of the fact that Carmen resents subtracting with a passion now, so you find another way. He can still try new things, just needs to handle the results better.
“...You keep a binder or somethin?” Is all Carmen can think to ask.
“Steel trap memory.” You tap the cap of the marker to your head, “Good though?”
He nods, “Good.”
“Good.” You take a breath, dragging a hand down your face, practically coming out of a fugue state. Carmen knows your need to have something to do, just as much as him, so he slides the jar of fig marmalade to you from across the table. You take it happily, unscrewing the lid. You’ve also been dying to get to this menu.
But Richie comes up from behind, scratch and sniff wine book in hand— Didn’t Mikey get you that? It was meant to be a gag gift but it’s actually quite useful. “Chip, can you also tell Chef Carmen the daily menu fuckin’ sucks?”
“Re-lax.” You sigh, pulling over all the ingredients and tools you need for Syd’s drink. “Syd told me ‘bout this though, daily pre fixe, or whatever it’s called?”
“It’s—” Carmen crosses his arms over himself, immediately defensive but trying his best not to be. “It’s an idea I’m floating, for now— It’s what the best restaurants do, and— And even if we don’t have full intent on getting a star, right now, it’s still important.”
“I just think…” You hum, trying to figure out the most delicate way to say it. “It doesn’t exactly give you the most room to collaborate or create—”
“The whole point of it is to collaborate and create—”
“Oh yes,” —As if waiting in the wings for this, Richie pops out behind you again, “What wasssit? ‘Vibrant Collaboration’ and ‘Constantly Evolve Through Eating My Own Head like a fucking ouroboros’.”
“Relax.” You hiss this time, putting a hand up in front of Richie. You can speak for yourself. “You don’t have time to be creative or collaborate when you’ve gotta make decisions in less than twelve hours.”
Carmen tries to defend, he gestures to the one good plate of wagyu with mint that came out of this morning, “But the—”
You nod and hum, knowingly. The sweet sound stops him. You already know the answer, but you ask anyway, as you scoop fig marmalade into your cocktail shaker. “Did you get to try the pop rocks thing yet?”
“Well, no, it’s not viable to perfect that in such—”
“A short amount of time, angel?”
“Oooh…” Richie mimics Syd’s movements, air whistling between his teeth as he takes a sharp breath. He gestures, standing behind you, staring at Carmen as he slides his thumb across his neck. He mouths, ‘Mad mad.’
Carmen’s two closest friends are freaking him the fuck out and one of them wasn’t even doing it on purpose. How do they know that? How can they tell that? Are you gonna break up with him? Are you even dating? This work together thing was a terrible idea—
“You don’t have time to be thoughtful about things, if you do an entire menu every day, you’re gonna have to cut corners on what you’re willing to experiment with.” You reword, more productive, better for his brain. “Plus, prix fixe is a fuckin— In—In my opinion, is sort of a lacking idea, maybe, for a new restaurant.”
Carmen’s willing to give up the daily rotation, he’s not so willing to give up the pre fixe. “It’s what the best restaurants do.” Carmen loves the word best, huh?
“Have those restaurants—” You bite your tongue from what was going to be an immediate catty response.
You try again, measuring out orange liqueur and lemon juice as you do so. “You’re thinking like a Chef and you need to think like a customer— A- A guest, for a second.”
Carmen gives you the floor, mostly because he cannot compute the command. You continue, “Let’s do a little roleplay, alright? Let’s say we’re just average people, not workin’ at The Bear, and we’re goin’ on a date.”
“When?” “...When?” “When is the date?” “No, I’m— It’s— This is hypothetical.” “Yeah but in the hypothetical.”
You shrug, clicking tongs together as you grab large chunks of ice for your shaker. “I dunno, Friday nights? We have like a Friday night date night.”
“Oh, so you’re doing good.” Richie hums, proud of this hypothetical you, “Weekly date night is a cornerstone.”
“Moving on.” You elbow Rich behind you, shaker sloshing in hand, “I’m not a foodie, you are— In this hypothetical. You’re looking around at restaurants in the area for the date, you find The Bear— You find through their website with an improper hyperlink that the menu is,” —You list off on your free hand— “prix fixe, unavailable online, and changes daily so you can’t go off of reviews either. Also, it’s a new place, so you can’t really ask around for opinions.”
“Right.” Carmen nods, as does Syd. Uncle Jimmy’s got that stupid smirk he gets when he sees his kids fall in line. You pour the ouzo over the ice, focus on the drink, not Carm’s mopey expression.
“So, we probably wouldn’t go, right?”
Carmen keeps nodding, eyes downcast— Not upset, just can’t take feedback without keeping his head down. “Prob’ly not, yeah.”
You pound the shaker shut, shaking it lightly in one hand as you try as hard as you can to sweetly explain. “People are open to like, two surprises on an outing. New place, new food— But they will need a set menu and they will need to have it available beforehand— And they’ll need to be able to choose.”
He looks like a cat in the rain, so you add, “But. Maybe we can do a daily special? Or weekly, depending on burnout, but like, y’know, a semi-frequent one new thing. And maybe on like, Valentines or some holidays we do a fresh prix fixe. That’s how some of the best places do it.”
Carmen’s eyes upturn, smiling with them, at that last part. “You do keep a binder.”
“Syd does. I just pay attention.” You shake your head. “She mumbled about it all night when we got back.”
Adamu is immediately aghast, she should’ve realized ages ago, you were practically quoting her. “You said you couldn’t hear me!”
“No, I said you weren’t bothering me, and you weren’t.” You can’t hide your smile as you break the seal on the shaker. Syd sucks at sharing her ideas, but you’re happy to act as a good mouth for her good brain. “Hand me a lowball.”
With a grumble, Syd walks off in search of the lowball; while everyone does seem to agree this is best practice, Carmen does still seem a little sore about it.
“It’d probably also serve us well to do a seasonally rotating menu, right?” And so you throw him a bone. “Like Winter, Spring, Summer, Fall? Base it on what’s in season with local vendors?”
“What grows together goes together.” Tina says, nearly sing-songy. “Farmer’s market is rough though, Jeff.”
“Fuck a farmer’s market— With love, fuck a farmer’s market.” Back to writing on plexiglass you go. “We gotta do vendors, maybe f’ like, eggs and dairy we can do farmer’s market, but it’s just not feasible. Maybe for holiday pre fixe or daily specials? But full stock, it’s just not— It’s not it. And I say that while having farm fresh eggs and local honey in my pantry, alright?”
Carmen agrees, like a bobble-head this guy. He nods to Tina. “That cool with you, T?”
“Yeah, yeah, that’s cool with me.” Tina is a millisecond off to pipe in, which is really not noticeable– To anyone but you, that is.
“Why’s— Why would T not be good with that?”
“She’s in charge of farmer’s market.”
“Hm.” You bite the end of the dry-erase marker. “T, would you be cool with rotating that, now and again?”
“Ooh?” She tilts her head, shrugging, “Yeah, yeah, kid. If you wanna take the reins.”
“Not me.” You return to scribbling on the glass board. You point at Carmen and Syd through the glass. “Them.”
“I’ve paid my sous chef dues.” Says Syd, returning to the table with your glass. You tut, shaking your head. You refocus your vision from your writing to beyond the plexiglass, at them.
“You need it for inspiration! You fuckers keep forgetting you like cooking, I need you to visit the farmer’s market once in a while to remind you.” You take the lowball glass and tong a few ice cubes in. “Non-negotiable. Heard?”
A soft, simultaneous, “Heard, Chef.” from your cats.
“Good.” You strain the mixed concoction out of the shaker, into the lowball glass. It’s a very pretty peachy pink. You tweezer a slice of dried fig and place it on top. You grab a toothpick, stick it down the glass, pull it out, and taste the toothpick. Balanced, solid flavour, should be good.
You slide the drink over to Syd. “I can’t drink everything obviously, so first dibs goes to whoever the drink is based on— I don’t care who drinks it, just let me know if it goes down smooth.”
You also in turn hand Syd the recipe card and sketch, and you’re quick to move on as she reviews and sips away.
Ouzo. Dry anise tasting spirit. It’s got a licorice aftertaste, but oddly sweeter for it. It’s strong. Resilient. It’s made from remnants of unfermented wine grapes and a mix of other distilled and unused spirits. Better than the sum of its parts. It goes well with figs. Muddle it together with fig marmalade— Sweet yet earthy, spring-like. Orange liqueur to marry the flavours, lemon juice to brighten. Shaken, pour over ice into a lowball, serve with a dried fig on top.
Syd manages to reserve her reaction to a slow but repetitive nod, like entering deep space. She only comes back to reality when Richie reaches for the drink, wanting to try. She’s quick to pull it away from him, coveting the glass.
“Ah… what else? Rapid fire.” You knock your head around, remembering what The Computer talked about, and in quick succession, you line up every problem and talk through them, possibly solve them— As best as a newbie can. At the very least, you open the floor to actual discussions as you make drinks all the while.
“Opening a full sixth day I think will shoot us in the long run, especially if we ever get a kitchen plague going. Maybe we just open for half the day on Mondays going forward, try out breakfast? Stop booing me, I’m right.”
Richie’s. Also served over ice in a lowball. It’s similar to a whiskey smash. Nixing the mint. Whiskey bourbon— A good one, but not too good that it’s a sin to mix. Something with a cinnamon spice, that's warm all the way down, but never burns. Water it down a bit by stirring peach juice over the whiskey with ice for a brief moment. Float blueberry syrup on top. Add a toothpick, spearing two blueberries and one peach halve, balance it over the glass, for stirring. So the drinker can mix the blueberry syrup in and have a cute colour changing experience.
“Wine pours, me and Gary got that. We can also just start charging by the bottle by default— Whatever works.”
Marcus’. Simple but effective. A rum and coke ice cream float. Made complex by the fact that the ice cream is on a rotating schedule, based on whatever Chef Brooks is feeling that night and what’s in stock. Right now? Pistachio. So tonight it’s actually rum and seltzer, and it will probably continue to be rum and seltzer, based on the way Marcus’ eyes light up by the opportunity to get weird. More often than not, you’re going to need that neutral base. Served in a milkshake glass, because what else?
“I don’t understand why I couldn’t just grow these microgreens myself in house. They’re just plants you murder early, are they not? Am I missing something?”
Tina’s. Varied take on a spiked agua fresca. Fresh blended mango agua fresca— With ginger, of course. A healthy kick is a necessity for a mom drink. Sweetened with simple syrup, spiked with white rum, dash of agave bitters, top with coconut water. Served in a tall glass, because why would you skimp on portions?
“Why are we shipping flowers from New York? No, fuck that, go to Violet’s Violets— I fixed her cooler once, she falls in love and gives a discount to literally anyone who’s nice to her. Just send Marcus with some dessert and you’ll be set for life.”
And of course, Carmen’s aperol spritz. You go with the cherry syrup rim for now because it’s important to try. You’re almost certain it’s too much though.
“Napkins…” You rub your icy cold hands— From shaking up so many goddamn drinks— Over your eyes. “Why are we renting?”
“Buying is insanely overpriced.” Answers Computer.
You nod, shrug, but nod, fingers tapping the glass, “Well, it’s like renting over owning right? It might be better to own because, y’know, you might suddenly get told by your napkin vendor, like, like years down the line, after basically paying for these napkins in full through rent, ‘hey, actually, we’re gonna jack up prices or just take those napkins back’ even though you’ve —again— Literally had them for years—”
“Chippy, are you good?” Richie tries to massage your shoulder, tries to break you out of the doom spiral, but admittedly, it was never his forte. Still isn’t.
“We—!” Your voice hangs and is grating in a way it usually isn’t, ignoring the question. “We can produce our own napkins if we buy linens by the yard and hem ‘em ourselves. We—” You snap your fingers a couple times at Carmen, praying he backs you up. “We can even get The Bear monogrammed on them.”
“That sounds nice…” It’s Carmen’s turn to ease you off the ledge of insanity, gently. “It also sounds expensive, were you gonna do that?”
“Fuck no.” You’re quick to shake your head. “I fucking suck at sewing, my own jumpsuit is covered in my blood— No, my—” Oh. “Hold on.”
Your hand immediately goes for your back pocket, quickly pulling your cell-phone out, and dial one of your first starred contacts. Richie, over your shoulder still, sipping his blueberry and bourbon cocktail, excitedly mumbles. “Oh, put it on speaker.”
You’re annoyed before he’s even answered, knowing the headache you’re about to get. “Trust me, the first thirty seconds minimum will not need—”
“Hey!” It’s impossible to convey how earth shatteringly loud and drawn out his voice is, immediately upon answering. There may be eight seconds of the sustained vowel? Maybe more. Almost everyone flinches, par for Syd, Carm, and Rich. Though for all different reasons.
A touch grating, in the same way your voice just was. Like father, like occasional daughter, you suppose. “Hey kiddo baby darling sweetheart angel princess—” Oh, he’s mad. The whole ‘slew of nicknames when you’re pissed off’ thing? Yeah, that didn’t start with you. “Did someone die? Because that’s the only reason my darling baby only daughter calls anymore!”
You sigh, immediately exhausted, putting your weight on one leg. “Y’know, once a month is honestly a lot of times a year for a fully grown woman to call their dad, on average. I absolutely call you more than my friends call their dads.”
Richie almost chokes and whispers over your shoulder, hesitant, internally preparing for a dreadful future. “Please tell me that’s not true.”
“Oh, and you should be so lucky that you have a dad to call! Cause I bet those friends are calling funeral homes, aren’t they?!”
“Dad—”
“I should have never taught you independence. Worst mistake of my life to teach you how to be your own person. Richard, never teach your kid how to use a screwdriver, it will be the last day you are a father.”
“Noted, Big C-K.” Richie goes for your dry erase to actually write it down, you pull it away from him. That’s gonna require a long talk down later.
Carmen mouths to you, across the table, he meant to ask earlier when Cicero said it but there wasn’t time. ‘C-K?’
You mouth back, gesturing to the logo on your very own flannel ‘Chicago’s Kindest.’ He’s not the best with acronyms.
“Oh— And thank you for bringing that up! And what’s this I hear about you cutting your hours with C-K? I hear this from Tony of all people ‘fore I hear it from you?”
“I got a long-term bartender gig that’s actually gonna keep my bills paid, alright? And I like it. Putting that mixology double trade major to good use. Cicero’s got stock in the place, actually.”
“How you doin’ C-K?” Cicero pipes in next to you, waiting for his moment.
“Ah… I’ve got my complaints. For one, my Jack keeps you more company than me!”
There’s a series of hums and haws, that weird uncle secret language of heavy exhales that manage to say more than any actual words they could say.
You let the heaving run its course for ten seconds before cutting it short with, “Anyways, I’m still gonna keep the business running, just only in the mornings. It’s not like I brought in that much business anyway, I’m not pulling a foundation.”
“Everytime a small business dies, a rich man laughs, Jack!”
“It’s not dying! It’s alive! It’s present and alive!” Don’t get flashbacks. “Anyways, speaking of small businesses, I need a favour—”
“Ooh, the truth comes out, princess calls cause she needs bail—”
“For the love of God, let me get through a sentence, Pops!” You grumble, continuing. “Remember that overpriced monogram machine you bought for no reason?”
“It was not for no reason, it was invaluable because it saved my mitts from hand embroidering all those logos— And and— you have to remember—” You mouth the words along with him, mimicking him, because you know exactly what he’s going to say, “that it all starts in your community— And now you have like eight beautiful outfits, cause of me… And also it’s fun.”
“Well… If it’s fun, would you consider making some linen napkins?”
And it flows like ping pong, because your dad is a repairman— Well, former, but still. He’s simple. He handles negotiations simple. So do you.
“For who?” “Restaurant. The Bear.” “Why?” “Cause they need linen napkins.” “How many?”
You look over your shoulder to Richie, he does the math in his head pretty quickly, “Bout seventy to a hundred covers a night.”
“Six hundred.” “Pay?” “We’ll pay supplies, and I’ll give you like—” You look to Syd, expectantly. She has no answer, so you put your advanced on the line. “A thousand?”
“A thousand!? Less than a dollar a napkin! Is this pre-housing crisis?!” “I work here, okay?! Discount me!” “My God, princess, are you in love with the owner or something?”
That world feels like it's choking, but that's probably just you. You blow hot air out of your mouth, looking anywhere but Carmen. Refusing to see him even in your periphery. Refusing to see his blue screened but ever so slightly expectant expression. Well? Are you? …Or something?
After a long moment, you find a way to avoid the question. “Ah–Uh, Syd co-owns the place.”
“Oh, Adamu?!”
Syd pipes in, leaning over the table. You hold the phone out for her. “H–Hey, Mr. CK.” She waves, despite the fact that it’s a phone call.
“Hey kiddo. Aw, what a sweetheart. Lead with her next time!”
“Alright!” You bring the phone back to your face— It’s remained off speakerphone this entire time, but he continues to yell loud enough for the table. “I didn’t realize you were best friends.”
“Of course we are. Y’know she brought me this uh– this salmon mushroom risotto the other night? Unbelievable.”
You squint at Adamu curiously, whispering. “You bring my dad food?”
She whispers in return, defensive. “He lives on my block, don’t be weird.”
“For her, I’ll do it for eight-hundred, okay kiddo? I know how tough it is to start up a business, can’t imagine trying to move on top of that.”
Your turn to blue screen. Moving? You’re immediately over the love thing. “...Pardon?”
“...I’ll do it for eight—”
“No– Yes, sorry, yes dad that’s great—” You arch the phone away from your face, focusing your attention on Syd. “Syd, you’re moving out?”
She sighs, “Trying to.”
“Pops.” You straighten up, not looking away from her. “I’ll call you back to sort details later, okay?”
“Sure. You also need to let me know holiday plans, are we going up to Oak Park or—”
Somewhat disrespectfully, you speak hurriedly, “Yeah, we’ll figure it out, love you, bye!” and hang up. Still locked on Syd, you ask. “When you tryna move?”
“Like, soon as possible.” She stretches out her shoulders. “My own dad is sort of… Encroaching on my space.”
“Right.” Your eyes flicker with too many ideas, and you’re trying to temper expectations. “You wanna live by yourself?”
“I mean, I don’t really know anyone on the same timeline as me, with the same ‘low budget’ as me.”
The Computer attempts to interrupt the interruption of his review, holding a finger up, “And why are we talking about—”
But you hold the palm of your hand up, continuing on, “I need to move out asap and have a ‘low budget’.”
That’s Carmen’s queue to chime in, he loves your place. “What happened?”
Also Richie’s, “What? Chip, your spot’s like a historical site, ya can’t move.” and this is generally agreed upon by a sea of dismayed voices.
“To make an extremely long story short, I don’t have a choice.” You wave your hand in the air, silencing murmurs. “My sweet old lady landlord— The only landlord I’ve ever respected, got bought out by a fuckin’ big business gentrification ass company— I’m not in a rent controlled zone so they’re gonna keep jacking the rent until I move out so they can tear it down and build a new spot— They also may or may not have found out that me and Loretta— My landlord— Haven’t exactly been keeping up to date on my lease.”
“Meaning?” Carmen knows the answer will be bad.
But it’s somehow worse. “Meaning I pay my rent on time in cash and she texts me once a year saying ‘do you want to keep living here?’ and I say ‘yes’, and we continue on.”
“Well, hold up—” Richie holds a hand up, like he’s a genius. “Squatter’s rights?”
“I thought about going that avenue, but—” You gesture to Syd. “If you’re already moving, and looking for a roommate?”
She looks up and around, thinking about it. You decide to join her in the brainstorm, scooching yourself just an inch to the right, writing on free space on the plexiglass screen, ‘pros and cons’
“Pro.” You murmur as you write. “I have a better credit score than you.”
Syd sputters, half sarcastic. “Well, that’s just uncalled for.”
“It’ll give you more options for places! Better ones! Ones with in-unit laundry!” You defend.
“In-unit laundry…” “Your eyes just lit up in such a sad way.” “Con. You are an ass.”
“That’s a pro. A real con would be that I have a lot of plants and if I ever go on vacation I’m gonna need you to take care of them, and I’m not gonna have a binder for you, because I water them based on vibes, and if I come back and they’re dying I’m gonna be pissed off and very passive aggressive about it.”
“Violently honest.” “Pro. Mostly direct. Aside from when I’m not.” “Con. I’m not direct.”
“Con. That’s fine but if I get the idea that you’re mad at me I’m gonna act really weird about it until you reassure me that everything is okay and you don’t want to throw me out the window.”
“Yeah. Con. Same.”
“Pro. I’ve lived by myself for a while, which is good to have when you’re moving out of your parents for the first time. Con. I’ve lived by myself for a while, and I’m very used to the lifestyle of big t-shirt no pants, I’m not giving that up.”
Now that one takes Syd a second to unpack, “But, but like, underwear though, right—?”
“No shit I wear underwear!”
“Okay! It’s important to note!”
“Don’t be weird.” Richie grumbles behind you, solidly directed at Carmen.
Who’s whole face really just scrunches up in confusion. “‘Don’t be weird’? You don’t be weird.”
“I’m not bein’ fuckin’ weird—” “Then why are you up in my shit—” “Up in your shit? Oh wow—” “Fully not what I was referencing—” “Don’t be weird, cousin!” “I literally— I did not even move— Not a single cell in my body—” “And— And you only know that ‘cause you had to lock it down, you dog—”
“I don’t remember having kids, why the fuck am I in a Kindergarden?” Uncle Jimmy interrupts.
“I’m just takin’ care of my boy, Unc.” Richie raises a hand in defense, feigning innocence. “Can’t be too careful.”
“You super can, and you super are.” You grimace, elbowing him again. “And also, not important–!”
“Actually, no, very important.” Syd of all people interrupts. “Non-negotiable, like you can’t— …Like you— …When I’m home it’s like— Don’t—” Ah.
You roll your eyes and save her before she just about breaks out in a feverish sweat. “Syd, I wasn’t planning on it. That’s like roommate rule one.”
“Syd.” Richie points to his own eyes, then to hers, ‘watching you’. “Don’t be weird.”
“What the fuck—”
“Everyone shut up, pros and cons—!” You shout, gaining the attention back. “Pros. I have a car, we work at the same place, I have all the furniture for a living room already, you'd never have to wait for a landlord to fix something ever again, and I could probably do a bunch of D-I-Y renter friendly projects, if you wanted.”
“...Oh my god, a French-door pantry.” “I think I could swing that.” “Pros. You’ll never have to cook again. I guess that’s my only pro, actually.”
“Con. I have been feeding the cat on my fire escape for like a year and if I’m moving I am going to have to adopt her, so we’re gonna have a cat. She’s cute, she has five toes on each paw. Something dactyl, it’s called.”
“What’s her name?” Squid’s not excited per se, but she’s not saying no.
You shrug. “I never named her, let’s name her together.”
“No, that’s too much pressure—” “No, you’ll do great—” “What do you mean I’ll do great—?” “Three–” “Oh like together together? No! What—?!” “Shut up, just do it, head empty, two—” “No! I’m just not gonna say any—” “Yes you will, Squid. One!”
And together, perfectly in sync, like it was planned all along, you both say on queue, “Calamari!”
“There we go.” You write ‘Calamari’ on the plexiglass. “That’s my girl— That’s our girl, actually. I’m still not sure if she’s a girl.”
You click your tongue against your teeth, knocking your head back and forth in thought as you look at the scribblings on the glass. “Non-negotiables?”
Syd leans forward on the table, chin propped up in her hands. “I need forty-five minutes of bathroom time at the beginning of the day.”
“...Do you have a fuckin’ lactose intolerance?” “It’s my me time!” “Alright! Fuckin’ fifty minutes of toilet time for Syd. Ah, I need east facing windows… and uhm…”
Syd stares at you, and alas, she can tell, “You have a big non-negotiable…”
“It’s not that big… It’s more a group thing than a roommate thing, really…” “What is it?” “I think… It would be fun… If we all started playing Dungeons and Drag—”
There’s an immediate, staggeringly loud array of groans, you’re still writing it down nonetheless, all the while defending, “I honestly think a little roleplay and math would fix you assholes! I really think it would! I’ll D-M, I’ll make it so easy— Please?”
Syd grimaces, but inevitably nods. “Y’know what, you’re never gonna get a concrete schedule for that down, and no one else is gonna agree so yes, sure from me.” Still a win.
“Okay.” You hum, capping the marker. “So… Aim to move first of February? You down?”
It takes some time, and you realize as Syd’s brain frozen, that you might be overstepping. “Sorry, that’s going too fast, you think on it—”
“...I’m down.” You make it very easy for her to say yes, by giving her the option to say no. “Yeah, let’s do it. February. I’m down.”
“I’m so happy for you two, but I’m still fuckin’ reeling— Chippy, it’s– it’s— So many memories—” Richie’s being overly dramatic on purpose, hand on your shoulder, really laying on the vocal fry in his voice; but it is true. “I mean, come on, first time I’d ever been stabbed was on your block.”
“Sorry, what?” Carmen was having fun watching his two favourite employees figure out they’d be perfect roommates. He loves to be a fly on walls around you more than he’d like to admit. Richie managed to ruin it with one line. “Stabbed on your block?”
“Yeah,” You suck the air between your teeth, trying to think of some sort of white lie, but slowly shake your head, “I— Yeah, there’s no real way for me to down play it, I was so fuckin’ scared.”
“You were tweaking!” Richie laughs, clapping his hand against your shoulder, to him it’s a charming story— You’d probably be laughing too, if Carmen didn’t seem so… unpleased, let’s say. “You fuckin’ thought I was gonna die!”
“You fucking were!” You slap Rich’s hand away. “It was so close to a cerebral artery— First and last time I’ll administer stitches in my fucking kitchen, hand to God—”
“What’s the story?” Oh, new face from Carmen you haven’t seen before, bewildered annoyance, you’d describe it as, it’s going in your bottom five. “You live in a bad neighbourhood?”
“It’s rustic—” You try, but Richie opts to speak on your behalf. “Oh, Chip lives in a terrible neighbourhood, Cousin. You’ve been there, haven’t you?”
“Yeah but it didn’t seem that bad— No— Hold on, go back, stabbed why?”
“So I heroically defended a boy from crooked—” Richie tries, but you opt to speak on his behalf. “Richie was helping me bring up groceries, we saw some highschoolers shaking a kid down, Richie tried to break it up, one of ‘em stabbed him with one of those shitty switchblade comb things.”
“You got stabbed by a kid?” Syd snorts, but immediately regrets it because she has perfectly set him up for—
“Yeah, and wouldn’t be the last time, would it?”
“Richie, c’mon…” You reach up, patting the guy’s shoulder. “It was an accident and she apologized—”
Richie just raises his eyebrows, interrupting with a simple, “Mm-mm.”
And so yours raise in tow, “...Fuck you mean ‘mm-mm’?” And your head turns to Syd, alarmed. “Syd, you apologized, right?”
Her mouth just sort of hangs, sputtering noises do come out of it, but nothing that strings a sentence together. You grow more agog, repeating again, astonished, nearly laughing from the shock, “Syd?! You apologized, right?! And told him it was an accident, right?”
Syd takes a beat, but she gets there. “I— I. Am. Sorry I stabbed you by accident, Richie.”
“Hm.” Richie crosses his arms, considering, mostly sarcastically. “Yeah, I’ll take it, I guess. Would’ve liked a card.”
“I am not getting you a card.” “I’m jus’ sayin’ I’d’ve liked one.”
Carmen’s still five steps behind, “Are you gonna be fine living there? In January?”
You choke back a laugh, because this is how men try to show they care, one must imagine. “I’ve been fine for the past handful of years living there, I think I’ll be fine for another month, sweetheart.”
“Crime is bad in January.”
“I was a first responder, and I know that’s not true.” You shake your head, shirking off laughter. “It’s actually in the summer that you see shit go down. Again, I will be fine. But you are free to visit.”
“Point of order.” The Computer finally pipes up again— Might’ve forgot he was here, if you’re honest. “What are we talking about anymore?”
“Point of order— I feel like numbers— Talking numbers is great but it’s all just like— Paper, y’know?” You unlatch the plexiglass, gently settling it back down on the table. “We should be talking more.”
Tina nearly whistles in agreement, nodding by your side. “Heavy that, Jeff.”
“That’s what I’m sayin’, like—” You snap your fingers to the rest of the crew, hand moving to and fro to point at everyone, “Did y’all know until right now that Syd was moving? …No, right? Let’s like— Fuckin’ remember to check in, like y’know, family, Chefs.”
And without calling her out, you can feel Tina’s demeanor next to you change, relaxed.
“Heard, Chef.” Is the agreement from the crew, however, The Computer nor Cicero seem convinced, so with a sigh, you put on your most authoritative voice.
“Y’know. Three Cs! Caring cuts costs!” A phrase no one has ever said, but it sounds legitimate when you put it like that. That gets them to acquiesce.
Thank God, Marcus helps you move the conversation along, “...What’s everyone doing for the holidays?” Alas for both of you, the silence is deafening. “...Or not.”
You volley back for him, “If no one has hard plans I was thinking of having a lil’ Holiday party? Nothing big. Sort of a ‘goodbye old apartment’ party? Come by after you hang out with your families or whatever?”
“Not gonna go up to Oak Park?” Rich leans one arm on your shoulder, nursing his whiskey cocktail in the other.
“Meh.” You shrug, attempting to push him off you, but he doubles down. “We’re not so intense about holidays since everyone’s aged. I’ll visit my nephew on New Years.”
“I’m doin’ Eve with Eva, but I’ll be free on the day. I’ll come by. We doin’ gifts?”
“I mean I got you something, so,” You tap the bottom of his glass as Rich takes another sip, making him flinch. “Catch the fuck up.”
Syd pipes in, sniffing. “Me and my dad only celebrate on Christmas Eve now, so I’ll come.”
“Incredible. Two down.” You gesture to Marcus and Tina across the table. “You guys? Tina I assume you’ve got a loving family and shit?”
Tina smiles and nods, rightfully proud. “I do have a loving family and shit, but maybe I’ll come by late with them too?”
And Marcus tacks on with her, “I’m gonna be with my mom most of the night, but I’ll come through for a couple hours.”
“Perfect, perfect. Invites open to any plus ones as long as you text me first!” You hum, writing names down on the glass board. It’s kind of a nightmare of different lists at this point. “Richie, can you make sure Fak and Sweeps get the invite?”
“Yessir.”
“And us!?” Shrieks Cheech in the back, who really shouldn’t be able to hear you, he should be in the zone, slinging sandwiches.
You yell back without turning to him. “Yes, fucker, you and E can come, if you want! No fuckin’ plus one for you though!”
“Oh come the fuck on, Jack-Off!”
“Oh, make me a fuckin’ sandwich, big man!”
“Oh, I’ll make you a fuckin’ sandwich!”
“Oh, my dick!” A response that makes no sense, consistently the perfect bookend. You sigh, and finally, your eyes flit to the most terrified two in the room. “Berzattos… Holiday plans?”
“I think we’re gonna do dinner on Christmas Eve, and then the morning together? Well, I am.” Sug hesitates, she’s looking between Uncle Jimmy and Carmen. “I was gonna ask what Carm’s plan is…”
“I’ll go. I’ll go.” Carmen has to stop himself from biting the skin off the tips of his fingers. “I’ll go. And I’ll come to the party, after.”
“I’ll probably just go home with Pete after. Baby’s first Christmas, y’know.” Natalie hums and nods awkwardly. There’s a question both of them want to ask. Neither of them are brave enough to ask it. And while you can sense there’s something dancing in the air, you’re not going to overstep on this front.
“Mazel. I can buy silly decor with reason now. …Now let’s talk about the important grievances.” You hum, happy to end that chapter.
You turn just slightly to gently slap Richie’s cheek as he stands next to you. “Rich, you need to line your beard up, this neckbeard shit is pissing me off—”
“What’s with the fuckin’ drive by?!” “It’s been on my mind forever— You can’t be wearin’ suits and then be rockin’ that unkempt shit, clean up—” “I’m clean! I’m fucking clean!” “Who said? Who fuckin’ said? Cause I sure didn’t!” “How’m I s’posed to be linin’ my shit up every mornin’—” “You do not grow a beard that fast—” “Oh fuck you, I’m not fuckin’ Carmen, I grow a fuckin’ beard.”
Carmen’s just surprised to hear his name out of any name come up. “What– Now that’s a fucking drive by, what the fuck?”
“If we’re voicing grievances, I’d like to voice my fuckin’ complaint with Captain Crash-Out over here—” “Who the fuck is sublimating now?” “You’re not usin’ that term correctly, cause you’re not integrated—” “I thought you two worked this out on the road trip!” “We did!”
You only half regret starting this feud with the beard comment— To be fair, you’re right. “This is it working?”
“This is, in fact, it working.” Syd confirms plainly, her disappointment more than apparent. Rubbing the tips of her fingers to her temples. The fight is out of her, at this point.
“Alright.” You slap your hands together. “Richie, what is your complaint?” Are you just union rep now? You might be a union rep now.
“Carmen is fucking killing me.” The cocktail swishes and nearly spills as Richie points at the Chef, emphatic. “He won’t change shit for guests!”
“No substitutions!” It’s almost cultish, the way Sydney and Carmen yell it out together.
Richie scoffs, head reeling back. “What happened to it bein’ about hospitality?”
“I mean…” You suck air through your teeth, squinting. “If we’re sayin’ no substitutions, it’s no substitutions— Unless it’s like an allergy or sensory thing— But even then, it shouldn’t be like a major component getting replaced.”
“See? See?” It’s almost maniacal, rabid, how delighted Carmen is that you’re on his side. “Fuckin’ thank you. This is why I lo—”
Before Carmen can finish his sentence, Richie flails about to suddenly throw the peach and blueberry skewer from his drink at Carmen— Not the pointed side, he doesn’t want to stab the guy. Just wants to save him from running his mouth. The peach slice hits Carm’s chest as Richie stutters out, “F-Fuck you, fuck you, fine. No substitutions— What the fuck am I supposed to say then?” speaking over whatever syllables fell out of Carmen’s mouth, muddling them.
You cock your brow, but Carmen seems to quickly let the childish toss go, more than eager to move on. So you do too. “...Say some bullshit like, like, The Bear encourages —uhm— explorative culinary experiences where you let your taste buds go beyond your limitations and comforts— So eat a fuckin’ mushroom, you’re not gonna die.”
“If they don’t like mushrooms—” “Then they shouldn’t order it!” “How hard is it to just fuckin’ switch it out!?” “So hard! So hard! I think! I could guess!”
“I could do it.”
“Could you?” You cross your arms, leaning your weight onto one leg, pivoting to Richie. “Okay, roleplay, you’re Carmen, I’m you—” Just as Richie opens his mouth, you hold your index finger to his lips. “I know you wanna be a bitch, I’m askin’ you to just skip that part for me.”
His shit eating grin is only a little endearing. “How am I supposed to be in character if I’m not allowed to be a bitch?”
You clench and unclench your hands in the air, but let it go, opting to move on to your little thought experiment. “Chef, patient—” Instincts never give out, huh? “Christ, patron doesn’t want mushrooms in their anolini, I need you to sub it.”
“Ah, well I’m happy to do that for you, Host Richie, I—” He’s going to go into some scathing spiel, and you love the guy, but you have to rub dirt in the wound for the lesson to stick.
You speak over him, voice stern, “Chef. In order to keep pace, I need you to make this call in fifteen seconds, what are you subbing it for?”
Richie’s head shakes back and forth as he scrambles to get his brain to work.“Fuckin— Fucking– Eggplant.”
“Eggplant?” You ask politely, tone unsure. Carmen asks it with you, tone ridiculing.
“It’s a sauce isn’t it?” You squint, turning your head to the actual Carmen. “It’s like a really thick mushroom sauce stuffed pasta?”
He tilts his head from side to side, but nods. In gist, yes. “It’s a ragout. Low and slow cooked stew—” Carmy’s ready to rave about it and teach you every facet of the dish, but perhaps that’s too romantic for a public setting. God, he’s weird about love. “We keep it going on our back burners all day— It takes an hour minimum to make from scratch, you can’t just sub it.”
“Yeah, well…” Richie stops himself short of getting snarky for no reason all over again, taking a second to think about it. “Well, I didn’t know that. You didn’t explain that shit to me.”
“I don’t have time to hold your fuckin’ hand—” Carmen stops short of getting catty when you give him a very soft and yet gutting disappointed look. He pinches the bridge of his nose, sniffing. “I can’t explain why I do everythin’ I do when I’m— When we’re in a middle of a rush, I just need you to trust when kitchen says we can’t do it. Trust that I thought it through.”
Richie has to control himself, has to make sure the corners of his mouth don’t upturn just slightly, has to make sure it’s not clear that he is overjoyed that there’s finally middle ground, can’t get his hopes up. He nods. “I just wanna make everyone happy, y’know?”
“I know. You’re—” Carmen’s nose scrunches up for a second, God, he’s never had to say that he think’s Richie’s good to his face. And he’s not gonna start now, “Eggplant would be a good sub, if we had time.”
Richie prods his tongue along the side of his cheek, thinking. “Maybe I could look into knowin’ restrictions faster and estimatin’ their orders, so you can have ‘em on deck?”
And Carmen does think that’d be a waste of time, but he’s learning. He hears it out. “Could give it a shot, yeah.”
“Same team.” Richie reaches across the counter, and Carmen actually takes his hand, a quick dap. Civil.
“Same team.” First time you’ve heard Carmen adopt your idiom; you can’t help but smile, though you’re trying to hide it. You’re too focused on arguably the two most important men in your life to notice the silent conversation Uncle Jimmy is having with The Computer, speaking solely through nods and exchanged glances.
Pay is for Chip. Cicero nods, and The Computer nods back. He gets it now. Pay is for Chip. Not just the mixologist, not just the sommelier, not just the repairman, not just the not-quite girlfriend, Chip. You’re Chip. You’re the cog, the piece. The grease between everyone.
You’re the guy. Always have been, always will be.
The silent conversation and the warm feeling in the room is cut short though, by The Computer. “Can she deal with the butter thing?”
“What the fuck is the butter thing?” You immediately jump onto the case, when Carmen looks down and away from you, you frown, leaning in. “What’s the butter thing?”
Jimmy snaps his fingers at The Computer, he hands him an invoice, which is then handed off to you. Old Major Farms, Orwellian Butter, salted and unsalted. $11,268. You just. Stare. The math comes all too easy to your head. Worth a week?
“It’s the best.” Carmen repeats as your eyes remain worryingly unblinking. “It’s—”
“Carm.” Syd all but hisses, shaking her head in tight swivels, waving her hand around her neck for him to cut it. “Making it worse.”
“Angel is like, the worst it can get.” Hums Richie. Recalling your barometer of anger. Recalling the times when Mikey would say ‘what’s the point of paying bills?’ And you’d have to pull him aside. “Can’t get much lower than that besides—”
“Light of my life.” You look up from the paper in your hand, and both Richie and Sydney wince. Your voice is terrifyingly delicate as you nod over to the room behind you. “Apple of my eye. Can I speak to you in your office, please?”
Carmy’d like to say no. “...Yeah.” But you already started walking before he even answered, so there’s not much of a choice here. You head in by yourself, and thankfully, the door closes behind you, so Carmen’s got a second before he gets devoured.
He walks around the counter, and as he nears the door, Richie grabs his arm. He whispers as he hands Carmen what’s left of his cocktail. “You need to lock the fuck in.”
“I know.” Carm returns, shooting down all that’s left of the lowball. Why’s Richie’s the sweet one? Why’d Carmen get the cough syrup drink? That’s not fair. Do you not think he’s sweet? “Thank you for the— Intercept.”
Richie nods, he’s been unwillingly playing quarterback for Carmen since going to Rockefeller and seeing that goddamn giant tree and Carmen couldn’t stop opening his big fucking mouth after seeing you under the star. “Just think with your brain, not your—”
“Don’t.” “Was gonna say heart.” “Sure.” “Don’t be weird.”
“I know it’s expensive.” Carmen gets it out before even fully closing the door behind him, “But it’s normal prices, for high-end restaurants. I know it’s different—” He stops short when he finally turns around from the closed door, to see you, holding your painting.
It’s facing you, you’re reviewing it in your hands where you sit in the office chair; the brown wrapping paper freshly ripped and on the floor. Carmen still doesn’t know what’s on the piece.
“Carm.” You twist the piece around in your hand, turning it to him. He can see the nine squares. The Beef to The Bear. Mikey. “This is not another restaurant.”
Carmen continues to stare, silently, though he takes a step closer, reaching a hand out to graze over the canvas. You keep going, clarifying. “We’re not just another high-end restaurant. We’re us. And so we should be doing things like us. We’re the best, we don’t need the stuff to be.”
He was with you until that last part. His pursed lips say as much.
“It’s—” You smack your lips together, haphazardly handing him the canvas, he’s very quick to grab it with both hands, not wanting it unstable for a second. “Hold on, let me show you somethin’ — I think I left one in here.”
You roll the office chair back a bit, sinking down in the seat to reach far behind a tall cabinet; you have to pad your hand around in the dark nook for quite some time before you pull out— A screwdriver. An oddly shaped one, at that.
“...Has that been here the whole time?”
You nod. “Like threeish years at least, I think I threw it back there while telling it’s origin story. It’s part of the first set I ever got.” You grip the flat wooden handle. “It’s the worst screwdriver on earth, like, by far.”
That gets a little chuckle out of Carmen. “Yeah?”
“Yeah.” You look up from it to him. “It’s a handmade set. Dad’s dad made it.” You awkwardly roll closer to him, he leans over, head next to your head as you both look down at it. “It’s got a flat wooden handle, made of poplar— So not only is it fucking impossible to get a good grip on, it’s also so fucking slippery. It’s part of a whole set, passed down from my grandpa to my dad to me.”
“Sounds fucked.”
“It is.” You laugh, and so does he. “It’s purposefully meant to piss you off.” You rub your thumb over the dent marks in the wood— All from the times you threw it at something— Including the very cabinet that it hid behind. “You ever wonder why I took over the handyman gig, bein’ the youngest and all?”
Carmy shrugs, glancing from the screwdriver to you. “Just assumed you were the best.”
That gets another laugh out of you, and Carmen’s overjoyed by the sound. “Yeah, I’m probably the best. But that’s only cause I kept up with it.”
You turn your head up to face Carmen again as you explain, “When our dad started bringing us to jobs as kids, he would make us exclusively use this set of screwdrivers— Sort of as a secret test. My brothers would get pissed off, as planned, and they’d quit and cry. And I dunno, I guess I’d cry and keep going? And I learned a couple tricks, eventually.”
“Tricks?”
“Like.” You pull back in the chair and run your hand across the office desk. The corners of it are screwed into the metal cabinet below it. “It’s really good if you’re screwing from the top down.” Using it as an example, you start to unscrew it. “It’s balanced. And it’s really all in the grip— Always loosen your grip with this one. Even if that seems counterintuitive.”
You get it to unscrew just fine with your loosened grip. “But if that doesn’t work, and you just can’t get it to work—” You lift the screwdriver in front of his face, showing off the sides of the handle. He smirks at the— “Just make your own grooves, it’ll be easier to hold.” Tiny teeth marks.
“Carm.” You tap the handle to his nose as he zones in too much on it. “I’m the best repairman because I can work with anything. You’re the best Chef because you can work with anything. You don’t need the best when you’re the best.”
He’s the best?
He’s the best.
He’s the best.
“I truly think you could make just as good a plate with Becel as this fucking Animal Farm butter.”
Carmen’s the best. You think he’s the best.
He’s gotta think with his head and not with his heart and not with anything else, either. Lock the fuck in, Carmen.
“I dunno bout all that.” He shrugs, bashful and attempting to hide it, trying to shake the praise off his back.
“Well I know ‘bout that.” You shrug back, “I’m actually kind of a genius, when it comes to knowing who’s good and who’s not.”
“I don’t doubt that.” Carmy hums, and the sound is sweet without reservations. “...Painting is very good.” He nods to himself, on repeat, like a bobblehead. “Or I guess it’s less a painting and more a buncha photo transfers?”
“Yeah.” You set the screwdriver aside on the desk. “Most of them I took.”
“They’re good. It’s—” He pauses, tongue against his teeth. “It’s nice to see evidence he kept up, or somethin’.”
You nod, seeing Carmen’s brain struggle to keep pace in real time. “We took that one I think the day we talked to Uncle Jimmy about The Bear? Had to print out articles as proof we could make it work— Or, that you could make it work, rather.”
Carmen sniffs, crossing his arms, hands in tight fists— Probably too tight— where they hide. “Yeah, kinda fuckin’ up my end of the bargain, hm?” The light laugh that follows is hollow.
“Eh. You both did.” You smile, though it’s hesitant. “ But at least you’re still here fixing it.”
Still here. Still fixing it. That is in essence, the piece. Carmen gets lost staring at the squares, so you speak as he does. “I was trying to like. I dunno, replicate your brain.” He can see it. The messy yet coherent, controlled yet chaos. The love. The grief. The progress. The home. You see him. He can see that you see him.
“11k for butter,” Carm’s head doesn’t move but his eyes raise to you. “Is a week. More than a week.”
Ah. Carmen can see you too, see your thought process. The Ascaso, worth one of the worst weeks of Mikey’s life. The fucking butter. Worth more than a week of Mikey’s sobriety.
All you can do is nod solemnly. “It is, yeah.”
He nods back, tongue prodding his cheek. “That’s too much.”
“I’d agree.”
“I’ll switch to local.” You make it easy for him to fix his mistakes, by giving him the space to realize them.
“I think that’s the right call.” You nod, smiling. After a moment, you reach for Carmen to uncross his arms, and when he does, you take his fist and uncurl it— Your hand is a very soothing balm to the spots where he dug his nails into his own hand.
“Loosen your grip, Carmy.”
And so, he does. With a laugh and a look to high heaven, he loosens his grip. Really loosens his grip. Well— Not completely, he’s not going to say that, but he will say something that is just nearly as difficult but not quite. He'll bite down a little. He’ll make the grooves, for now, until his grip is good enough.
“Come to dinner with us?”
would you believe me if i said I had to rewrite a bit of this last scene because intially it went so rom-com and I was so disgusted when I reread it in the morning I had to stare at it in the subway ride to work like "what the fuck am I gonna do"
was this chapter good? God I hope so. I felt like with where we're going, it was kinda necessary to do Chip's onboard, set the stage for what work is like for her. I had to loosen my own grip with this one lmao. just allow myself to be a LITTLE messy. if it's bad, lie to me. tell me sweet little lies peach
DAD REVEAL THOUGH EH? MR CK!!! So much did happen this chapter. Chips on board! Squid Ink moving in together era commences! Christmas party!! Also. Would you believe me if I told you no shit syd was gonna move, she was planning it in S2, but I was planning this whole time for Ink to get evicted!! I want those fuckers to be roommates STAT!!!
anyways, i really hope i remembered to write down everyone that asked to be added to the taglist, i might've not. i'm very sorry if i didnt
oh also if you wanna be added!! send in your thoughts!! words for words baby, essay for essay cmonnn gimme ur character analysis!! (oh and also ask to be added, ofc)
@hoetel-manager , @fridavacado @sharkluver , @spectacular-skywalker , @silas-aeiou , @deadofnight0 , @sunbreathingstuff , @anytim3youwant @navs-bhat @whoknowswhoiamtoday @gills-lounge @blueaproncarmy @itsallacotar @catsrdabestsocks101 @popcornpoppin @renaissance-painting @lostinwonderland314 @v0ctin @ashtonweon @mrs-perfectly-fine @thefreakingbear @anytim3youwant
#carmen berzatto#the bear fanfiction#the bear x reader#the bear hulu#the bear fx#the bear#the bear x you#carmen x reader#carmy x reader#carmen berzatto x reader#carmen x oc#carmy berzatto
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You asked for Spencer-centric thoughts, and i shall deliver!
You cannot tell me that that during quarantine, reader and husband spencer didn’t do a wordle and the nyt mini crossword first thing in the morning. I just imagine r just doing it one day and technophobe spence absolutely clueless, yet intrigued and immediately getting hooked on them.
Anyways, thanks for helping all the hot people stay delusional xoxo
𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐬 𝐎𝐟 𝐀𝐟𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 ♡
Spencer Reid x reader || Masterlist || Spencer playlist
Omg, anon, your mind!!! this is just simply *chefs kiss 😙👌 and totally something husband!Spencer would do! (Ugh, I need him so bad!) and I'm always down to keep the hotties delusional 💕 thank you so much for sending this in, lovie!
word count: 1.3k
The sun peeks through the curtains, casting a warm golden glow across the bedroom where you lie in bed, still under the covers. It is another day of quarantine, another day of uncertainty and isolation. But thankfully, you are not alone.
Spencer, your husband of three years, is fast asleep next to you, his messy hair spread out on the pillow and his lips slightly parted. You can’t help but smile at the sight of him, so peaceful and serene in his slumber.
With a sleepy smile, you grab your phone, there is still over half an hour till your alarm goes off. That is one of the nicer things that has come out of this whole ordeal, the extra time in the morning now that you have to work from home, and all the extra time you get to spend with Spencer is so precious to you.
You can’t help but snap a quick picture of him as he lays there, he looks so peaceful and relaxed, and it is moments like these that you want to capture and keep forever, smiling to yourself as you make it your new home screen.
You quickly scroll through your notifications, checking in on the latest news and messages before opening up the Wordle app. As you begin to fill in the letters, Spencer begins to slowly stir beside you. “Morning,” he murmurs before letting out a little yawn.
You look over at him, his eyes still half closed. “Good morning, sleepyhead,” you say with a chuckle, leaning over to plan a soft kiss on his cheek. Spencer grumbles in response, still half-asleep but clearly enjoying the affection.
He stretches languidly, his arm brushing against yours, sending a spark of warmth through you. “What time is it?” he asks, rubbing his eyes.
“It’s still early,” you reply, showing him the screen of your phone. “We have some time before we need to get up.”
“Oh, that’s nice,” Spencer mumbles, leaning into your touch as you run your fingers through his tousled hair with your nondominant hand while you continue to play the game, occasionally glancing over at Spencer as he slowly wakes up. The sunlight fills the room more and more, illuminating the warmth of the moment between the two of you.
“What are you up to?” he asks, as he finally opens his eyes fully, looking at the phone screen curiously.
You chuckle softly as he squints his eyes to better see the colorful grid of letters on your phone.“It’s just this word game I'm playing. I have to guess a five-letter word in six tries, and it gives me feedback on each guess. It’s pretty fun, actually. You wanna try?”
Spencer nods, still somewhat confused but willing to give it a try. You hand him the phone, and he furrows his brow in concentration as he studies the letters on the screen. After a few moments of contemplation, he tentatively enters his first guess. You watch with amusement as he receives the feedback and starts to strategize his next move, sitting himself up to rest his back against the headboard, reaching for his glasses on the bedside table.
You can’t help but smile at his focus, his dedication to this simple word game making you love him even more. As he continues to guess and receive feedback, you snuggle closer to him, resting your head on his shoulder.
“Wow, you’re good at this,” you comment, it never never ceases to amaze you how his brilliant mind can adapt to new challenges with such ease.
“I guess all those hours of reading dictionaries finally paid off,” he jokes, chuckling at his own nerdiness.
He quickly finishes the game and looks at you triumphantly, a proud smile on his face, clearly pleased with himself. You laugh, giving him a congratulatory kiss on the cheek. “Good job, smarty pants,” you tease, feeling grateful for these simple moments of joy and connection with your husband.
“Can I do another one?” he asks eagerly, his eyes bright with excitement.
“Sorry, babe, there is only one a day, you’ll have to wait till tomorrow”you say, ruffling his hair playfully. “But we can play together again tomorrow morning if you want.”
Spencer pouts exaggeratedly, but then shrugs with a smile. “Alright, I’ll hold you to that.”
“But the New York Times has a crossword puzzle we can do together if you want,” you suggest, knowing how much Spencer loves a good challenge. His eyes light up at the mention of the crossword puzzle, and he eagerly agrees.
“You think I can get that Wordle thing on my phone too?” Spencer asks, reaching for his own phone, which he usually only uses for phone calls and texting, despite him being a walking oracle of knowledge not very tech-savvy and not very fond of technology.
You laugh at his eagerness, nodding in approval. “Of course, I’ll help you get it set up,” you say, enjoying his enthusiasm. You can’t help but smile as the device lights up, the lock screen displaying a picture of the two of you on your last vacation, arms around each other, smiling brightly into the camera.
As you show Spencer how to download the app and set it up on his phone, you feel a surge of gratitude for the life you have built together. Despite the challenges of quarantine and the uncertainty of the future, you find solace in the warmth of your relationship and the simple joy of spending time with each other.
With the app up and running on Spencer’s phone, you both settle back against the pillows, ready to tackle the crossword puzzle together. As you work through the clues and fill in the boxes, you can’t help but feel a sense of contentment wash over you. The worries and stresses of the outside world fade away, replaced by the simple pleasure of being with the person you love.
The room fills with the sound of your laughter and playful banter as you work together to solve the puzzle. Spencer’s intelligence and wit never fail to impress you, and you feel fortunate to have him by your side, especially during these trying times.
After successfully completing the crossword puzzle, you both set aside your phone and cuddle up together, enjoying the comfort of each other’s presence before you eventually have to get up and join your zoom meetings.
As you snuggle closer to Spencer, feeling the warmth of his body next to yours, you can’t help but appreciate the love and companionship you share. “I’m so grateful that it is you that I’m stuck with,” you say softly, pressing a gentle kiss to his cheek.
Spencer turns to look at you, his eyes soft with affection. “I feel the same way, my love,” he replies, reaching out to intertwine his fingers with yours, leaning in to press a sweet kiss to your lips. You lean into the kiss, feeling a rush of love and gratitude wash over you. “But we better get up and start our day,” Spencer says, reluctantly pulling away from you. You nod in agreement, not wanting to leave the comfort of the bed but knowing that the he is right.
With a shared sigh, you both get out of bed and start your morning routines, enjoying the simple moments of togetherness as you go about your day. The sun continues to shine through the windows, casting a warm glow over your home as you and Spencer get through the day.
And as the day comes to a close, you both settle back in bed, falling asleep in each other’s arms, the warmth of your love and companionship surrounding you like a protective shield. And as you drift off to sleep, you know that as long as you have each other, you can face whatever life throws your way.
#springtyme writes#spencer reid#spencer reid x reader#dr spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x you#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid oneshot#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid fanfiction#dr spencer reid#doctor spencer reid#spencer reid fluff#spencer reid x y/n#doctor spencer reid x reader#criminal minds fanfiction#criminal minds x reader#criminal minds fluff#criminal minds fanfic#criminal minds fic#spencer reid x fem!reader#criminal minds#spencer reid x f!readder#spencer reid x gn reader
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hiii if ur still looking for emily prentiss requests… could u possibly do like i dunno something about a playlist? sorta where you & emily make a playlist for your relationship and each sonh correlates with a different memory… perhaps….
p.s. thank u so much for writing my first request, it couldnt have been better ❤️❤️
- 🐞
hi again, bug!! (hope its ok i call u that 💗) i’m so glad you liked the other one 🫶🏻
this was so fun to write, ur ideas are just superior 💌
𝒎𝒖𝒔𝒊𝒄 𝒉𝒐𝒍𝒅𝒔 𝒎𝒆𝒎𝒐𝒓𝒚, emily prentiss
emily prentiss x sunshine!wife!reader
you and emily remember your relationship by making a playlist <3
warnings: mentions of pregnancy (no pregnancy tho), emily's fake death, bit of angst, r likes the smiths and stevie nicks?
note!: i used laufey and taylor for this cause they're what i've been listening to, i'm not implying em would listen to them!
·˚ ༘₊·꒰➳: ̗̀➛
Emily pads towards the balcony as soon as she finishes the laundry, eager to get her late night cuddles with you.
You lay on the hammock, city lights illuminating the balcony and making your face glow nicely. She takes a moment to take in your appearance. Fuzzy pink socks, an old yale hoodie of hers and pyjama pants that don't match even the slightest bit. Yet you look better than ever.
Your gaze is focused on your phone, thumb scrolling slowly and brows furrowed in concentration.
"You'll get wrinkles if you keep frowning." She chuckles and your face immediately softens when you look at her.
"I'd stop frowning if my wife was laying with me and not doing boring chores." You joke back, hand reaching out and signalling for her to join you.
Emily complies without a question, clumsily laying behind you so that you're now between her legs. Her hands rest on your stomach as she peeks over your shoulder to get a look at your phone screen.
"What are you so focused on?" She asks in confusion as she looks at the list of songs on the screen.
"Well, since we are planning on having a plus one on the family soon, at some point i'll be way to pregnant to get on the jet. And i know i'll miss you too much so i thought that maybe i could make a playlist of songs that remind me of us. Just so i can have a bit of you while you're away." She finds herself at a loss of words. It's not that she doesn't know you're quite loud about your love for her, but it never ceases to make her speechless. It always has and always will be that way.
"Can i have that after you're finished?" She asks. The idea of finally starting a family with you might be thrilling, but you are right on one part. It will definitely suck to be away on a case for days while you're here all by yourself.
"Mhm, but only if you help me make it." You fingers toy with her ring, head turning to kiss her jaw before returning to look at your phone.
"Deal." She smiles in return.
·˚ ༘₊·꒰➳: ̗̀➛
from the start, laufey
"me and you and awkward silence, don't you dare look at me that way"
"when i talk to you a cupid walks right through and shoots an arrow through my heart"
Emily takes one last glance around the living room, searching frantically for anything out of place. It's probably the fifth time she's doing it in the spawn of minutes. But to be fair, it's your first time coming over and she feels the need to have everything perfect for you.
Her apartment is usually very tidy, she tends to do things more easily if the space around her is organized. But it has to be specifically perfect today. The floors are shining, no dust can be found on the shelves and she has a vanilla scented candle on just to make a nice ambiance.
It's probably weird that she's doing all of this just for a sleepover with a friend, but you're not really just that. Unless friends kiss on parties and just whenever they feel like it. She tries to think of it as something 'casual', it just feels quite impossible to do so when she's pretty sure she's had feelings for you from the start.
A knock on the door has her taking a deep breath, rubbing her already sweaty hands on her jeans. Opening the door, she's met with your excited smile.
"Hi, Em!" You're practically bouncing off your feet with happiness.
"Hey, come in." She returns the smile just as excitedly, taking the bag slung over around your shoulder and setting it on the nearby sofa.
"Your place is so nice. Is that vanilla?" Her smile brightens up so much her cheeks hurt, she's so glad you noticed.
"Yeah, i found this candle somewhere in a drawer and remembered it's your favorite smell." She actually went to the store earlier to buy it just for you, but that would be too weird to admit.
"That's nice." You note, a slightly awkward silence following.
It's almost inevitable, you've never been here and the fear of saying something wrong is definitely present. You look around the living room, desperate to find something to say so you can hear her voice again. Your eyes land on the record player on the corner of the room, a collection of vinyl's on it's side.
"You collect?" You ask pointing to them.
"Oh, they're mostly from when i was a younger. But yeah, i buy one or two occasionally." She chuckles nervously before adding, "Do you wanna take a look?"
"Yeah, yeah of course!" You answer a bit too enthusiastically, cursing yourself internally from embarrassment.
"I should warn you, they might not really be your taste." She comments as you start looking through the generous collection of vinyls.
"S'okay, i wanna know what you like." You smile warmly, looking at her with those damn eyes that make her melt into a puddle.
You chuckle as you come across one of them, "Siouxsie and the Banshees? The cool punk kids at my school used to listen to them."
"I guess you can call it that." She grimaces slightly at the image of it. "You know, i actually went to their concert. Pretty sure i have a shirt somewhere."
"Cute." You mumble before going back to your search, not noticing the way her cheeks grow red at the simple compliment.
"Oh my god- Fleetwood Mac?!" You gasp, delighted to finally find one that you both might like.
"Yeah- do you like them?" She smiles surprised. Her fingers hitch to tuck the strand that falls on your face but you beat her to it.
"Are you kidding? Die hard Stevie Nicks fan." You pull out the vinyl and she encourages you to play it.
"Hm, guess you did find something your taste after all." She says, making note to remember that you like them.
A few months later when your birthday arrives, she gifts you a vinyl signed by Stevie Nicks herself. She knew you'd tell her not to spend that much for a gift, but it was worth for your smile.
·˚ ༘₊·꒰➳: ̗̀➛
paper rings, taylor swift
"now i've read all of the books beside your bed"
You enter the bullpen with a small smile on your face, bag of italian food in your hands. You're sure that if Hotch sees you here on your day off, he'll probably drag you outside himself so you quickly look around for your raven haired girlfriend. Because your day off doesn't always mean Emily's day off - unfortunately.
"Hey Spencer, have you seen Ems?" You ask the boy who seems awfully concentrated in the magic cube in his hands, occasionally taking bites off a sandwich.
"Pretty sure i saw her entering the break room a few minutes ago." He answers, not really looking up from whatever he was doing.
You frown at that, you know she didn't bring her lunch today. It was in the counter this morning, so you assumed she just forgot it,
"Thanks." You ruffle his hair as walk by, heading to the break room before you can hear him grumbling.
As silently as possible, you open the door. Emily sits by a desk in the corner and doesn't seem to notice your presence at all. She has a book in her hands and you assume she's listening to music by the mp3 laying on the table.
Once you're close enough to see better, you recognize the book cover immediately. It's one of your favorite romances, it's so dear to you that it has it's special place on your nightstand - along with a few others. And now that you think about it, you don't remember it being on it's place this morning. A surprised smile makes way to your face, amusement all over your expression.
You tiptoe to stand right beside her before settling the bag on the table. She jumps, visibly frightened, before she sees you and her cheeks flush in embarrassment. Her hands reach to take off the earphones.
"Are you reading my romance book? I didn't quite take you for a romance girl." You tease.
"Well- i'm full of surprises." She answers, trying to hide her flustered expression but failing at lying - as always. You don't show any signs of being convinced at all, arms crossing and eyebrows raising.
"Fine, you win." She grumbles, closing the book and turning slightly to get a good look at you. "I thought it would be nice to read the books you always talk about." You think your heart might just explode at that.
"Em, that's so sweet-" Your eyes flicker to her mp3, a small gasp leaving your lips. "Emily Prentiss, are you listening to the smiths?" You laugh. This definitely comes as an even bigger surprise to you, she's never been a big fan of them.
"Yeah? You like them, right?" She looks confused and you can't help but think she looks more adorable than ever. She's probably doing the romantic thing someone has ever done to you and doesn't even realize it.
"You're perfect." You confirm with nothing but sincerity.
Emily groans in annoyance when her cheeks grow flushed again, dropping her head against your stomach and smiling against it. You chuckle quietly, fingers running through her hair while the food starts getting cold in the table.
"I brought you some food. Your favorite." You sit in the chair next to hers, bringing it closer to her.
"You're perfect." She remarks while reaching out for the bag.
·˚ ༘₊·꒰➳: ̗̀➛
fresh out the slammer, taylor swift
"fresh out the slammer i know who my first call with be to"
"now that i know better i will never lose my baby again"
You feel overwhelmed with emotions, just as many as when you were sitting on a hospital chair while a doctor was telling you your girlfriend didn't make it. You don't exactly remember how long ago that was, too long. Months of denial and grief that feel like a blur now.
It doesn't really matter now. Not after finding out Emily was actually very alive.
You don't know how you're supposed to react. What does someone do when they find out their girlfriend had to fake her death because of a serial killer?
You feel betrayed, how could she not tell you? You feel anguished, because you might have been mourning her for all this time but now it feels like you're mourning for what you had before. It's never going to be the same again.
And you want to feel angry at her, you really do. But it always drifts off to thinking about all of the things she's probably went through since the last time you saw her. You think about what he could have done to her, how bad it must have been for her to have to run away to Paris.
You want to hate her for ruining it, but you love her because she's her.
She's dead. Emily's dead. The untouched clothes on your shared closet and dusty record player are proof. You don't dare to touch her things, you can't.
The knock on your door isn't unexpected at all. You knew she'd come, you just couldn't pretend you knew how it was possible.
The sight of her face makes your breath get stuck in your throat, knot returning and making it impossible for words to come out. Tears bream in your eyes and all you can get yourself to do is let her in and rest against the door once it's closed. After all it's her house too, her home. Or at least you thought so.
Emily only looks at you for a moment, not getting any luck at locking eyes with you as you look at anything but her.
"I-" Her voice cracks before she gets a chance to speak, taking a deep breath before trying again, "I'm sorry- god, i'm more than sorry. I had to, i promise you. There was no other option. I couldn't- he would've-" She cuts herself off when you finally look at her. She expected anger, she wants you to be angry her. It's what she feels like she deserves. But if anything, you look sorrowful.
"I need you to know why i did it. I needed to protect you. I know i hurt you, you have no idea how much it cost. But it would've ended way worse if i hadn't done it. I did what i did because i love you, as much as it doesn't seem like it." She forces herself to keep a steady voice, it won't help her at all to breakdown right here.
"You could've told me." Your voice is small and strained. But she's never felt more glad to hear your voice before.
"You would've come after me." She whispers with a shake of her head.
"I would've." There's no room to lie, not right now. You know why she did it, you understand. But that doesn't make it hurt any less. What now? Are you supposed to pretend that nothing happened?
"Please- i know i'm asking so much of you already. But don't give up on me, i know i won't give up on you. Let me try to fix it, i want to try." She sounds almost desperate, tears freely running down her face. "Please."
"I want to. But i can't just pretend nothing happened all of the sudden. Not yet." You answer. It pains you to almost reject her, never in your wildest dreams you would have thought this would happen. But it's not a 'no', just a 'not yet'.
"You don't have to, i'll wait for you. I'll wait for my whole life if i have to. It's worth it, i know it is. There's no one i could ever love as much as i love you." She's sure of what she's saying and you don't have to try hard to know it.
You nod, your own tears leaving your eyes. It would never be the same, not after all you've been through. But there's always the option of starting over and forming something even better.
˚ ༘₊·꒰➳: ̗̀➛
bewitched, laufey
"wrapped me in your arms, leaned in and whispered 'keep me in your heart'"
"you bewitched me, from the first time that you kissed me"
You rub your tired eyes, quickly adjusting to the dim light illuminating your room. You feel groggy and messy, but that nap was definitely a good idea. This case had been particularly draining and right after you landed all you needed was a nap. Going to sleep at daylight to wake at night feels weird, but that means Emily is probably already home. She insisted on staying at the bau to get her report done.
Getting up and quickly fixing your clothes, you walk down the hall. The delicious smell of lasagne (Emily's speciality) reaches your nose and you smile contently.
When you approach the living room you come across your lovely girlfriend settling a fresh out the oven tray of lasagne in the table. The table is set in a weirdly fancy way, two scented candles adding up to the romantic mood and there's jazz humming softly from the vinyl player.
"Hi, love. Well rested?" She asks softly, walking up to you and kissing your forehead lightly.
"Mhm...what's the special occasion?" You wrap her in a hug and nuzzle against her neck. Still feeling slightly drowsy from the nap as you place lazy kisses there.
"Can't i just want to do something nice for my amazing girlfriend?" She teases. You believe that she would do something nice for you, she does that even way too much. You don't believe that's the case though, it feels strangely planed. You know her enough to realize that quickly.
"You can, m'love." You decide to play along, not wanting to ruin whatever it is that she's planning. Besides, it does look really nice. Mainly the lasagne that's starting right at you, your stomach growling in anticipation.
"C'mon let's eat, don't want you to get grumpy." She laughs as you scoff, it is true that you tend to get grumpy when hungry.
Emily pulls the chair for you and you're even more sure now that she's got something up her sleeve. Either that or the glimmer in her eyes that she has specifically when she's excited about something.
Dinner goes by peacefully, you mostly just eat silently as she talks about what you should both do tomorrow since it's your day off. You settle on visiting the new bookstore that's just around the corner and have a nice walk at the park after. Even after almost a decade of being her girlfriend it still amazes you that even when she should be resting at home, she prefers to spend the precious time she has in her days off with you.
Emily is your company for life, your coworker, your bestfriend, your family, your girlfriend. It almost feels silly to simply call her your girlfriend, she's the one you want to spend the rest of your life with, that's one of the only things you're absolutely sure in your life.
You're doing the dishes when you hear the volume of the music playing in the living room turn up. Seconds later, two familiar arms are wrapping themselves around you from behind. You feel her kiss the spot right behind ear before nuzzling against your neck.
"Dance with me." It's more of an affirmation rather than a question. You raise your eyebrows but comply anyway, drying your hands quickly on a towel before she's dragging you to the living room.
The music is more clear now, the soft melody promoting a small smile to your lips. Emily's hands find your waist once more, this time in front of your. You immediately wrap your arms around her, face almost involuntarily resting against her shoulder as you both start gently swaying with the music.
Your heart beats almost wildly in your chest, and yet you feel more at peace that ever. It's not often you get to just enjoy her company like this. You feel incredible lucky to get to work with her everyday but it feels good to have Emily all to yourself even if just for a few moments.
She hums softly with the song, head resting against yours and occasionally leaving a kiss or two on your hair. Her hands are against the small of your back, warm enough for you to feel it through your sweater.
"Marry me." She says it so casually, as if it's a sentence just like any other. Your feet come to a halt, moving your head so you can look her in the eye. You search for any kind of hesitation or regret, yet you only find tenderness and the same glimmer from before.
"I know this is not a lot," Emily reaches into her pocket, pulling out a velvet box. Inside there's a beautiful golden ring, a small gem adorning the middle. "but i don't think i can wait anymore. I know you're the one i want to spend my life with, i know you're the only one who would ever go through all of that for me and you have no idea how much i love you. Everyday i wake up next to you i feel incredibly lucky and i find myself dreaming about having a family with you. And most of all i dream about being your wife. Will you marry me?" She asks and you can feel the happy tears threatening the spill from your eyes.
"Yes!" You answer excitedly, grabbing her face to place multiple clumsy pecks on her lips. She pulls apart momentarily to encourage you to slip on the ring, beaming once it contrasts perfectly with your skin - even more than she had imagined.
"Ugh, i love you." You smile brightly, lips find hers once more, but this time with a shiny ring adorning your finger.
˚ ༘₊·꒰➳: ̗̀➛
a/n: had so much fun with this <33
love you,
cat 🤍
#criminal minds#emily prentiss#criminal minds x reader#emily prentiss x reader#emily prentiss x female reader#emily prentiss x you#fluff#emily prentiss x y/n#wlw
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d a t i n g m a t h e o r i d d l e
fandom- Harry Potter
pairing(s)- matheo riddle
a/n: i had fun with this cause my boy is'nt even cannon and i've derived this from the show deadly class (its absolutley lovley) and im so sorry i deleted the request baby with love, tiya
requested- yes
warnings- unexperienced writer, not thoroughly edited
i think it would be a slowburn
i think it would take time for both of you to personally acknowledge what you both have
because Matheo Riddle is too high and mighty to have something as low and embarrassing as a highschool crush
my man will be in utter confusion why he wants to stare but looks away to act cool
like you both keep glancing at each other, for what?
y'all just ignoring each other just to avoid a zoo in your stomach
but like you know you're in love, you know he's in love, at this point everyone knows but y'all just don't admit it
because if you do, everything suddenly becomes to real
I have always had such an obsession with him
him, his face, his everything
his eyes are so pretty, they're just gorgeous and that freakin smile would just get me on my knees
I think even though he seems as the cold hearted bitch he's just so sweet to you
I've always had a thing for people who has a soft spot for me ugh
everyone hated him, loved him or wanted to be him
he was the it girl
I don't think he'd be much into playing quidditch as such
but he's pretty darn fit if i must say so myself
he'd be good in combat fighting
hence all the fights, but he'd be winnin my luv
he'd teach you how to play video games
he'd make you playlists and everything
once you both have reached that bond he'd be so obnoxious
he'd be loving, caring and everything
10/10 fr
he loves that everyone knows you're dating
this would be important as he gets jealous so easily
he's just yours and I love that
#mattheo riddle#harry potter fanfiction#matheo riddle headcannon#marcus lopez arguello#marcus lopez x reader#marcus lopez imagine#marcus lopez smut#deadly class#george weasley x reader#harry potter headcanon#harry potter imagine#harry potter incorrect quotes#harry potter preferences#harry potter fluff#fred and george#harrypotterimagines#george weasley#harrypotterimagine#matheo riddle imagine#mattheo x y/n#mattheo x you#mattheo x reader#mattheo riddle smut#mattheo riddle x reader#mattheo riddle fanfic#mattheo riddle fluff#mattheo riddle x you#theodore nott#cedric diggory#theodore nott x reader
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i was listening to after midnight by chappel roan and i just! imagined! tsubaki!
like imagine being out with a shitty boyfriend whose ignoring you at a bar and just
“i kinda wanna kiss your girlfriend if you don’t mind- i love a little drama- let’s start a bar fight” and just!
i’m so down bad for tsubaki it’s a problem 😭😭😭
-🥟
🥟 !!! this ask was such a vibe tbh i loved it this sm. you gave me a fun lil song (that’s now in my playlist btw) and a scenario anddd an awesome character ?? i had to write something :> thank u for dropping by !!!! tsubaki is such a lovely character <3 (u r even lovelier)
tasuku tsubakino (tsubaki) x f!reader. sfw. cw cheating (but ur technically not in an official relationship so…!?)
“he’s not with you?”
you’re perking up at the familiar sound of tsubaki’s voice, doe eyes locked on his figure as he slides into the seat beside you before letting out a heavy sigh.
“this again?” he gestures towards your boyfriend, the one who was currently on the other side of the room— over there with another girl.
you’re as quick as always to start shaking your head in denial, hands balling up into frustrated little fists as you press them further into your lap— because hearing things like this never got any less embarrassing no matter how many times you had heard them.
and now that you think about it, it seems like tsubaki was always the one who was catching you at the worst times possible. it was always him being there with you as soon as your boyfriend was leaving you all by yourself again.
and actually… could you even call him your boyfriend? he never officially asked you out.
you can still remember it as clear as day— the very first time tsubaki had asked you if you were seeing anyone. the pause in your voice before you were sputtering out the most confusing response he’s ever heard in his life was all he needed to understand your situation.
you hear tsubaki let out a knowing hum from beside you as soon as your lips are tugging into that pouty frown that he’s grown all too familiar with. that boyfriend of yours— he thinks to himself, what a fucking waste. a pretty face like yours should never be given a reason to frown like that.
it would never happen with him.
“want me to keep you company instead?” he’s giggling when your lips fall open in surprise, deciding to push that bubbling feeling of frustration away for a second and really take in that adorable look you’re giving him.
“i’m more fun, anyways.”
“…h-huh?” you stammer, and the sweet smile tsubaki gives you in response does nothing to rid of your clear confusion. “isn’t that… you know?” you’re quickly looking around before you lean in, as if whispering a dark secret to your best friend, “..cheating? that’s bad.”
oh. you’ve always been exactly like that from the very first day he met you. almost painfully sweet and so, so very oblivious.. because this alleged boyfriend of yours clearly had a much different idea of what you two were.
tsubaki knows this because he’s always kept an eye out for you. you might be too oblivious to notice the men who’ve been ogling at you this entire time, but he’s not.
if your loser of a boyfriend wasn’t gonna protect you, someone else needed to.
“hm?” tsubaki’s fingertip presses into his bottom lip, head tilting to the side, “well, you two aren’t official, no?”
your pout deepens at the implication.
“it’ll be me,” he points to himself, “and you,” he flicks his manicured finger your direction, and you’re suddenly much more aware of how pretty his lipstick looks on him when his lips are moving like that.
“and i’ll give you a little kiss.”
“hm..” your voice comes out quiet and murmured when his hand comes to cup the side of your cheek, thumb stroking the skin as he leans in a little closer, eyes softening as he patiently waits for your decision.
“o-okay,” you finally nod, and he’s letting out an small exhale he didn’t know he was holding to begin with, “…and this is gonna make him jealous?”
tsubaki gives you an eager nod.
“he’s missing out big time,” he smiles at you, eyes flickering towards your boyfriend for a moment— making sure he gets a clear look at this before he’s delicately tilting your head up, closing the distance between the two of you with a kiss.
your eyes are quick to flutter shut as the familiar heat rises in your cheeks, and you wrap your fingers around tsubaki’s wrist to keep him exactly where he’s at. he’s gentle with you, but the soft whimper that slips out of you from the way he’s moving his lips against yours has his heart skipping a couple beats, his free hand now wrapping around your waist to bring you even closer against him.
“good,” tsubaki whispers against your lips between kisses, sneaking a glance at your boyfriend— who was now staring at you with wide eyes, “let’s show him just what exactly he’s missing out on.”
#wind breaker (satoru nii)#wind breaker x reader#wind breaker fluff#windbreaker x reader#windbreaker fluff#tsubaki x reader#tasuku tsubakino#tsubakino x reader#🦢— mail !#🤍 from: 🥟 !#🗯️ — queued !
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leveling the playing field // epilogue
summary: seven years later.
pairing: coriolanus snow x fem!reader
wc: 2.7k
masterlists / nav / requests
tags/warnings: capitol brat!reader, maybe slightly ooc coryo, idk i tried my best. this part is quite tame! idk, discussion of the games as a concept is pretty messed up? obviously r & coryo are both delusional but whats new??
a/n: this is it :') thank you all so so so much for all the love on this fic! it means so much to me that you guys enjoyed it! but don't get too sad (like me) bc i am not ready to let them go so i'll probably do like blurbs and stuff ab this series so stick around for those!
series masterlist // playlist
~ seven years later ~
"You've got this, Darling. It's going to be perfect." Coryo insists, kissing your temple as you relentlessly adjust your hair, trying to tame any imaginary flyaways in your flawlessly straightened hair.
"As long as it's not a disaster..." You mumble, giving up on your hair and refocusing on making sure you have all your papers.
Arena map? Check. Tribute and mentors list? Check. Schedule?
"With you in charge, I do not doubt that it will be anything short of flawless. I know you. You wouldn't have it any other way." Your husband assures you, taking your spot in front of the large mirror to adjust his red coat, matching to yours.
You sigh, tucking the large stack of meticulously organized papers into your bag. "I mean, does anyone honestly expect it to be perfect? It's my first games... There's a small margin for error, right?"
"No." Coryo replies sternly, turning to face you. He grabs your chin as you groan, forcing your eyes to meet his. "There's no room for error, but it will be perfect. So don't worry." He plants a gentle kiss on your lips. "And if you need anything, just call."
"Okay..." You hum, smiling as you look up at him. "I'm going to miss you, though." Your smile shifts into a pout, and he kisses your forehead.
"I know. I'll miss having my assistant around, too." He mumbles against the softness of your skin.
Your time working together under Dr. Gaul had been a dream. Why did everything have to change all at once? You've been together every day for years, and you had the most fun helping plan the games and pitching all your ideas to Dr. Gaul, staying up late over ideas due the next morning and too many cups of coffee, giggling over how funny it would be to see a games where the people of the Districts got to vote over who to send in.
"Do you think it's because that's kind of what happened to Lucy Gray?" You giggled in the dark, feeling Coryo's form shift under the blankets next to you before you felt his breath hit the side of your face.
"Now that you mention it..." He laughed quietly. "Yeah, it totally was."
You had always come up with Dr. Gaul's favourite ideas together. But now, she was gone. And it was just you. You honestly thought that woman was some kind of immortal beast, but clearly, no one is fully bulletproof.
She had offered the position of Head Gamemaker to both of you in her will. You and Coriolanus had worked well together, she had always said that about you. That the two of you were her favourite experiment.
"No, Darling. You take it."
"What? No, we've always done everything together." You protest, furrowing your brow. "She's offered it to both of us, we can do whatever we want, no more waiting for her approval. We can run with it! Come on, it'll be so fun, Coryo."
"That's your dream. Not mine." He smiled at you, brushing his thumb over your cheek.
You frowned, focussing yourself on pulling the buttons of his shirt so they were perfectly aligned. "Are... Are you sure? I don't know if I can do it without you."
"You'll never do anything without me, you know that." He hummed, pushing your hair out of your eyes. "If you need help, just ask. I'm right here. Always."
"I'm not an assistant anymore." You laugh. "Technically, you're kind of my assistant now." You shrug, leaning down to pull on your shoes, white with bottoms red to match your coat.
"Okay, well, I wouldn't put it like that..." He laughs, shaking his head at you and holding out a hand to steady you while you adjust yourself to accommodate your heels.
You take it gratefully, standing up and brushing off your coat once more with your free hand. "Be honest, Coryo, do you think the bear is too much? I feel a little like it's cheating, they don't even really have a chance. Do you get what I mean?"
"Darling," He cups your cheeks in his hands. "No one will be able to look away. That's the most important part."
"I just... I want it to be something different. Something people will still want to watch."
"Everyone will be watching." He assures you. "Now, let's get going. You have a big day ahead."
"Yes sir, Mister President."
"My name is Lucretius "Lucky" Flickerman, your favourite and only host of the annual Hunger Games on Capitol TV, and I have a very special treat for you all this morning before the beginning of the games." You gently remove your coat as you sit down across from Lucky, holding it out for someone to take before the cameras flit your way, though the live audience can already see you.
"For anyone who lives under a rock, this beautiful woman here with me is our lovely First Lady of Panem, and now, Head Gamemaker, Dr. Y/N Snow." He continues as your coat is taken away, and you smile across at him. "Thank you so much for squeezing us into your very busy schedule. Now, how are you feeling about today, Miss Snow?"
"Doctor is fine." You correct him politely, to which he utters a quick apology. "And I am feeling very good about my first games. Dr. Gaul left some big shoes to fill, but I've been working with her for years so I have some really exciting ideas that I just can't wait for the world to see."
"Yes! I'm certain you do." Lucky grins. "Now, I don't know how much of our audience will remember this, but the first time we met was during the tenth games, I was hosting for the first time and you and your husband were both mentors! Just young academy students with some big dreams, isn't that right?"
You laugh, nodding as he speaks and letting the cheers die down. "Yes, I remember that. All of us were kind of getting a feel for how things would work, and my husband was actually the one who came up with the ideas of betting and sponsorships. He has truly always been such a leader, and so smart. He was the one who asked Dr. Gaul if I could help him with his mentorship, and she agreed, and then she just really loved how well we worked together so she kept us around to study under her all these years. It has been such a fun and kind of... fulfilling journey for us both."
"And now, here you are." He nods at you.
"Here I am." You echo it back to him, waiting for another question.
"Now, we have to address what can only be described as the elephant in the room..." He starts, and you try and hide your confused look as you straighten your posture. If there was some kind of problem you should have been made aware before you set foot on stage. "That summer, after your mentorship. Tell us. What happened? Both of you disappeared off the face of the earth right after your success in the games, then came back with these shiny new internships under Dr. Gaul, how did you swing that?"
"Oh!" You laugh, partially relieved it wasn't about these games, but hesitant because everyone knows better than to bring up the tenth games in any sort of detail. "Well, that was the beginning of our internship with Dr. Gaul, and she wanted us to gain some life experience, so we did some touring of the Districts on our own to get to know the people of Panem better. Neither of us had ever left home before, so it was definitely a unique experience that I think was really good for both of us. It was a super secret thing, for some reason. We weren't even to tell our families."
"I see! Well, I hope you learned everything you sought out to?"
"We did." You nod. "And more."
"Okay, well, with that cleared up, tell us more about the games you have planned for us this year. Is there anything new we should be expecting?"
"Oh, definitely." You nod, smiling wide now that you can once again talk about your games. "But I wouldn't want to spoil anything, so everyone will just have to watch." You shrug.
"I don't know if you are aware of this, Dr. Snow," He leans in a little closer, smile on his face. "But one new thing that we know for sure is changing this year, is that the president, your husband, has made it mandatory to watch the games. Not just here in the Capitol, but everywhere in the Districts as well. He made an announcement just this morning, he wants everyone to see what you've worked so hard for."
"Aw." You blush, pressing your hands to your chest. "That's so sweet! No, I didn't know that." The audience eats up your reaction, and you try to keep your eyes on him instead of acknowledging all the clapping and shouts from below you.
"Well, that's just about the cutest surprise! He has a lot of confidence in you." He laughs, reaching over and patting your leg. "You've all heard it here, he's just as good a husband as he is a president!"
"It's true." You agree, hardly audible over the crowds enthusiasm.
"Speaking of your husband..." He says, turning back to look into the wing of the stage and nodding at someone. "He set us up with a little surprise for you, if you don't mind."
"Oh, please." You laugh, covering your face as your cheeks heat up. "Of course he did." You shake your head, whistles from the audience not helping your blush.
"Okay, you can look now. Don't hide!" Lucky laughs, and you lower your hands from in front of your face to be presented with a bouquet of white and red roses. It wasn't an extravagant gift from him, the amount of roses he has gifted to you since your return from Twelve together is astronomical by now, but it's a gesture you cherish nonetheless. You smile as you take them.
"Beautiful, as always." You grin, making a point of smelling them before handing them back to the assistant who's waiting with a vase for them.
"And we have one more thing here, I believe..." He hums, looking back again while you're distracted passing off the wrapped flowers.
When you turn back to look at him you gasp, hands flying up to cover your mouth, fearless of whether or not you would smudge your lipstick. "Is that for me?" You ask, voice higher in octave from the excitement as one of the stagehands walks out with a small dog, fur dyed a soft shade of red with a matching bow around its neck.
"Indeed it is!" Lucky laughs as you're handed the puppy.
"Oh my god..." You smile, tears brimming in your eyes. "Hi there..."
"I think there's a note for you there too..." Lucky urges you and you grab the tag tied onto the bow. "Mind reading it for us?" He says, holding his handkerchief out to you.
"Thank you," You laugh, dabbing under your eyes with your free hand. "A new assistant to match your shoes." You read, laughing at the inside joke.
Everyone laughs, and you get from Lucky's confused expression that you should explain. "Uh, working under Dr. Gaul we would always joke that he was my assistant and vice versa." You laugh, wiping your eyes again before you continue. "I am so proud of you. Finally, the world will see you as I do. Intelligent, strong, and beautiful. Unstoppable. That's why I love you, you're as pure as the driven Snow."
The audience awe's, but you know none of them get it the way you do. "Another inside joke." You nod at Lucky, trying to hold back from crying so much you turn into a mess.
"I stand corrected. That is the cutest surprise." He points to the dog in your lap. "Both literally and figuratively."
"I don't know what I'll do with it." You laugh, shaking your head as the puppy jumps up against your chest, trying to lick your face.
"How about a name, to start?" Lucky prompts you.
"Oh, gosh. Well..." You giggle, lifting it and setting it back down so it will sit in your lap. It's so small, hardly bigger than your hands. It'll likely never grow larger than your lap. It's perfect. "What about Lucky?" You tease.
"Oh, you flatter me, Y/N. Come on, something better."
"I don't know!" You laugh. "I'm not good at naming... things."
Lucky laughs. "Our Head Gamemaker with no ideas? That seems unlikely."
"Okay, okay. You're just putting me on the spot here, I'm a little nervous." You laugh, stroking over the dog's head. "I tell you what, before the games begin this morning I'll come up with twelve names, assign them randomly to the districts, then whoever shall win the games will determine the name of my dog. Does that sound fair?"
"Ah! That's brilliant!" Lucky laughs, clapping his hands together. "And that's a good incentive for anyone who hasn't yet placed their bets or sent in donations for the tributes! Your donation may just be what gives the First Lady's dog its name. How fun!"
"It'll be interesting." You giggle, looking down at the puppy in your lap. It must have been white before the dye, it took so well. Maybe it will fade into a pink before it grows out its natural white fur- you wouldn't want it to stay red forever, but for show, it was perfect.
"Now, we really shouldn't be taking up any more of your time. You have a busy day ahead!" Lucky says and you nod in agreement, standing up and carefully tucking the small dog under your arm. "Thank you for making time for us, I know I'm looking forward to seeing what you have in store for us."
"Thank you. I really hope you all enjoy the games!" You smile, holding out a hand for him to shake which he takes quickly, then allowing you to walk off the stage.
As predicted by a certain Mister President; Coriolanus Snow, your first games as Head Gamemaker went without a hitch. They were perfect in every way. Capitol citizens were buzzing- not just about the games, the mutts you incorporated into the newly decorated arena, or the most shocking kills, but also about your dog. The people loved her, and so did you. She hardly ever left your lap or your side for the duration of the games, which only lasted a matter of days.
The party your husband threw for you at the presidential palace, your home, at the end of the games was extravagant. Coryo couldn't help but broadcast his pride to all of the Capitol. He loved you; you were his, and he needed everyone to know. Not a soul in all the world was anywhere close to being on your level, and shaping you into the perfect wife and First Lady was what Coriolanus Snow considered his greatest achievement. As you stood next to him, his palm tucked neatly against your lower back, you were perfect. More perfect than you were the day you fought for a spot in the mentorships that he granted you, more perfect than the he first time he kissed you, and more perfect than both of the days he had killed someone for you. Without question, he would do it all again if it meant he would get to hold you even just one more time.
"I'm so proud of you, Love." He gently rubs your back, looking down at you while you overlook your garden from the patio off of your bedroom.
You smile, standing up on your toes to plant a kiss on his cheek. "Snow lands on top." You whisper, biting your lip when you see a shift behind his eyes.
"You bet we do." He hums with a smug smile, lifting you up and carrying you back inside.
And somewhere, thousands of miles away in the Northern shambles of a still recovering District Thirteen, while you and your husband are celebrating, Sejanus Plinth and Lucy Gray Baird share knowing, sorrowful glances when it's announced on the crackling radio that the winner of the Seventeenth Annual Hunger Games was a boy from District Two, and because of this, the First Lady of Panem's dog shall be called Sage.
taglist: @totallynotkaibiased , @stelleduarte , @klplynn , @secretsicanthideanymore , @bejeweledreverie , @gloryekaterina , @andrewgarfieldsbitch , @queenofspades6 , @pepperonipastas , @ladybug0095 , @lunamothwrites , @sbrewer21 , @mus-tbe-a-weasley , @splxtscreen , @unclecrunkle , @karmaswitch , @coconut-dreamz , @nekee-lilac02 , @ooooglymoooogly , @riddlerloveb0t , @lovedbalances , @notyourwildestdream , @snowlandson-top , @too-lit-for-fanfic , @utopiakys , @deafeningballoonnacho , @roosterschanelslut , @chmpgneprblem , @cosmoetik , , @urvampgfsworld , @carolanns-world@nan-nie , @shakespearseclipse , @iovemoonyy , @notyoursweetheart-honey , @xyzstar , @eatpizzasass, @slytherinholland , @queenofshinigamis , @elodiebeau , @soulessjourney
taglist is closed for coryo unfortunately, but my requests for him are open!! so send me all your suggestions!! requests here!!
#tbosas#coriolanus snow#hunger games#tbosas x reader#tbosas fic#the ballad of songbirds and snakes#coriolanus snow x reader#coriolanus x reader#coriolanus x you#coriolanus fanfiction#coryo x reader#coryo snow
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