#i love how noodley he is in the film

[chellustrates]

i adore this iteration of sun wukong 🍑

[zukos-tiny-burnt-ear]

Inside out 2 thoughts

ok, so like i said i got to see inside out 2 yesterday and i really enjoyed it! ive been rotating it in my head all day and collecting my thoughts on it and i want to share them (long post ahead and naturally contains spoilers so if you care maybe consider avoiding)

so if you've seen any ads about this movie you probably know the general premise which is that the movie follows riley as a 13-year-old, and the new changes she is going through as a result of being an adolescent. additionally, four new emotions move into riley's mind - envy, embarrassment, ennui, and anxiety. it's a fun concept, and i think it's a very good expansion from the first movie! and after watching this one i actually kind of hope they make one last movie, perhaps set when riley is a senior in high school and getting ready for adulthood (and in the scene where joy/sadness/disgust/fear/anger are trapped in the vault they meet riley's "dark secret" who is kept very vague and not explored and says he isn't ready to come out yet so i could see them exploring it in the future. plus many popular kids films like to become a little trilogy, rule of threes and all)

anyway id like to first of all talk about the designs of the new characters. i don't have a whole whole lot to say about envy, but i do really like how little she is, it think it makes her come off as like a little dog, which adds to her being the embodiment of envy (you know how little dogs always want to act like they're bigger than they actually are). and i adore the way she likes to sit on the console, i think its very cute. i do wish she was green, as that is the color most closely associated with envy, but i can also acknowledge that they may not have originally planned for a sequel when designing the first five emotions. the first five are a nice almost-rainbow, and envy/jealousy is simply not as common an emotion for younger kids as it is for adolescents/teenagers, so it makes sense that disgust is green instead. envy also reminds me of a different character from somewhere else but i just cannot for the life of me think of who

embarrassment is one who i think was very cleverly designed actually. i love that he is very large, which means that it's nearly impossible for him to avoid attention which just makes his own feelings of embarrassment worse. i just think its a lovely irony of character design, and appreciate the thought that was put into it. i also enjoy the fact that he's pink, like the color of blushing (such as from embarrassment). also, despite the fact he doesn't really speak throughout the movie, his role in helping conceal sadness when she sneaks back into headquarters was very sweet and i think he's a lovely little guy

im not 100% sure how i feel about ennui's overall design. at first i wasn't so big on how human he looked, but as im thinking more on it (and double checking his appearance) i realize he's shaped more noodley than i had initially thought, and he moves like a slinky which i think is fun. also the way he just kinda hangs out in his socks is a nice detail (whereas the other characters have some semblance of shoes or just little feets). i also like that he was given a french accent, as the word comes from the french language, and i just think its a good touch. i did remember him having a beret, but apparently he does not ¯\_(ツ)_/¯. im a big fan of the indigo color though, but thats also just cause i love a good dark blue

and lastly there's anxiety, who i have found i absolutely adore. she completes the rainbow with her orange color,* which is just perfect to encapsulate the feeling of anxiety (think like orange traffic cones and such that are meant to serve as caution signals). someone else on tumblr made a post talking about how they were glad that she was very creature-esque, as pretty much all the other "girl" emotions were much more human shaped, which i whole-heartedly agree with. she reminds me of a muppet, or perhaps a strange bird. most importantly though i love how she portrays the feeling of anxiety which im gonna get into in the next paragraph

so when i went to see the movie, i went into it expecting anxiety to be characterized as your typical nervous-wreck type character, as it is a disney filmed aimed at kids, and it seemed a simple enough portrayal. instead, she is characterized as intelligent and friendly, though she is most certainly a fawn and an over-thinker. she toes the line between logical and illogical in the same way that anxious thoughts do in real life. the way she rationalizes all the poor decisions she makes for riley almost seems to make sense, despite the fact that its clear riley's life and personality are crumbling and then being held together with duct tape. for example why on earth would riley leave her friends to hang out with the high schoolers? well her friends are going to be leaving her anyway so we better get a start on making new friends. it almost makes perfect sense except it doesnt. and as anxiety continues on at the helm of riley's mind her decisions get worse and more frantic, more worried about how riley will be perceived and what her future will be like, until she literally begins to spiral out of control

those are all my big thoughts on it, but there's honestly probably more i could say. however this post is long enough so im going to stop here for now lolol

the climax of the movie is when riley is playing in the scrimmage at her hockey camp, and anxiety is doing everything she can to get her onto the high school team. however after being too focused on scoring, anxiety accidentally causes riley to harm one of her old friends and gets her sent to the penalty box, where anxiety begins to panic because in her eyes, if she can't get riley to score she can't secure a good future for her. she begins to move rapidly around to console, giving riley an anxiety attack. in my personal opinion, it is such a perfect visualization of how it feels to spiral, where your mind is moving a million miles a minute but you're completely stuck, terrified about this one little thing that you've put so much unnecessary weight on. visually it was beautiful and it was an amazing analogy

*i also really like how all put together the characters complete the rainbow, with red (anger), orange (anxiety), yellow (joy), green (disgust), turquoise (envy), blue (sadness), indigo (ennui), purple (fear), and pink (embarrassment), which circles right back to red

[eurusholmesakabestsisterever]

“How to Train Your Dragon”  Series

How to Train Your Dragon. I’ll be perfectly honest, I could probably write at least five pages on the subject because there is so much to talk about. But I’ll try to keep this relatively short and sweet. So, we’re all familiar with the movies; two of them have been released and the conclusion to the trilogy is set to release February 22, 2019 (at least in America). But the books, though lesser-known, are crafted brilliantly as well. Not to mention all the short films (technically five, but also technically four, I’ll explain) and spin-off series ( Riders of Berk, Defenders of Berk, and Race to the Edge). But for now, I’ll stick with the books and spin-offs.

There are 12 books in the How to Train your Dragon series. The first book, of course named How to Train Your Dragon, begins the adventures of Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III, the Hope and Heir of Stoick the Vast, Chief of the Hairy Hooligans, Oh Hear His Name and Tremble, Ugh, Ugh (yes, that is the Chief’s whole title), a small, noodley boy of eleven (technically 2.75 years of age, because he was born on February 29. But what do I know?) and he has to complete his First Task of becoming a viking: Get your Dragon. He ends up with this tiny Common or Garden-sized dragon which he appropriately names “Toothless”, because the dragon had no teeth (but very sharp gums, which come in handy in saving the day and getting in trouble throughout the series). The first six books (How to Train Your Dragon, How to Be a Pirate, How to Speak Dragonese, How to Cheat a Dragon’s Curse, How to Twist a Dragon’s Tale, and A Hero’s Guide to Deadly Dragons) are light-hearted and interesting enough, the seventh book (How to Ride a Dragon’s Storm) acts as a bridge between the first six and last five, but then the last five books (How to Break a Dragon’s Heart, How to Steal a Dragon’s Sword, How to Seize a Dragon’s Jewel, How to Betray a Dragon’s Hero, and How to Fight A Dragon’s Fury) is where the plot gets darker, more serious, and a whole lot more interesting. Little tidbits from the first six books, begin playing important role from book eight onward. I think the best of these books is that they are written as memoirs by Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III, with prologues and epilogues at the beginning and end of each book, although the actual story is written in third person point of view.

Where to begin with the cinematic series. As aforementioned, there are technically five and technically four short films. I guess it’s your preference, but I’m saying that there are four. These shorts (The Book of Dragons, The Gift of the Night Fury, The Legend of the Boneknapper Dragon, The Dawn of the Dragon Racers, and, technically, Racing for the Gold) are just little glimpses of everyday life on the Isle of Berk, one-shots, if you will. So The Book of Dragons is Hiccup, Astrid, Gobber, and Fishlegs making corrections to the Book of Dragons and then they go into how the Book came to be, explaining the different classes of dragons and their abilities. 

The Gift of the Night Fury is the set at the first Snoggletog (the winter holiday that the Vikings celebrate) with dragons. Everything’s all fine and dandy until all the dragons, with the exception of Toothless (since he can’t fly on his own anymore), suddenly fly off in a mass migration and it’s a mystery where the all go until Hiccup finds out why they all up and leave. 

In The Legend of the Boneknapper Dragon, Gobber tries to track down and finish off the dragon that’s been chasing him down pretty much his whole life. Unfortunately for Gobber, the entire village believes that the dragon is just a myth. Gobber manages to rope Hiccup and the gang into finding the Boneknapper and end it. 

Dawn of the Dragon Racers explains how Dragon Racing (as featured in the beginning and end of How to Train Your Dragon 2) became such a popular sport on Berk. At first, Berk had a Regatta, an annual boat race as traditional as Snoggletog. Hiccup is left as Acting Chief while his father goes off for supplies in preparation for the Regatta. The teens are asked to round up the sheep that have scattered all over the island and it turns into a game which the village loves more than the Regatta and demand that Dragon Racing replace Boat Racing. 

Now comes the explanation for Racing for the Gold’s technicality. This could be more classified as a one-shot, or rather, a series of one-shots, than an actual short story. It’s just a little run-down of what Viking Olympics would be. Events included are the Bobsled, the Ski Jump, the Snowboard, the Speed Skating, and the Medal Ceremony. Each segment is about thirty seconds long, so put together, total run-time is about two minutes and thirty seconds. So Racing for the Gold is officially classified as a short film, but it’s really more of a series of one-shots.

In short, the entire How to Train Your Dragon franchise is a mind-blowing masterpiece and it’s not just the films. It’s everything that came before and everything that comes after. I’ll be sad once the cinematic trilogy is ended, but it’s the message of friendship and adventure that really matter throughout the books, the movies, and the series that really matter.

[firespirited]

Blade 2 notes

(this would make the worst live blog)

First 15 minutes are corny af and all in service of a retcon OTL what a waste of good will.

Whistler is back, now the film can begin

okay youngster norman reedus Skud420 blaze errryday lol ok edgelord

Whistler takes one look, calls him a shitbird, right on.

Kris is Karrying-this-film-offerson

Donnie Yen's martial arts choreo is the real star of this thing, I’d recognize those little precision steps anywhere.

Oh yee-ikes the CGI stunt doubles came out CLAMP noodley

How very Vampire extraTM to have a DNA lock pierce your hands instead of doing a finger prick

What kind of character actors does Del Toro want and how many? well every-body’s hired and will die on screen in short order.

It’s Roooon Perlman! And his character starts with a racist joke, was it to rattle Blade or to establish him as a puppy kicking bad guy? or can a white vamp legit go through life not getting their ass kicked by black vamps for that human race nonsense? either way from here on out it’s all about the Blade/perlman banter, their flirtation is the only life in this braindead flick.

This movie has so much rap rock and most of it terrible

Y2K Vampires love black leather, it’s such blatant “we’re not like those Anne Rice vampires that dress like flamboyant pirates”. So they doubled down and dress like leather gays instead. Everybody’s weilding guns all the time, wily nily no trigger discipline, pointing wherever. This is such macho posturing it looks silly.

so one of the vamp mercenary squad’s signature weapon is a big ol battle hammer... with a knife on the end. That is a crap weapon, and the dude is called Lighthammer. This is such a comic book movie, that so halfassed. If that was my character I’d insist on a proper morgenstern or literally any other weapon. Believe it or not we have improved on the hammer since medieval times. Go to a hardware store mate, you’ll find something lightweight that’ll serve you better than your anvil on a stick with a knife in it. I have lost braincells over this stupid weapon.

Donnie Yen is called snowman and is mute, neither is ever explained. he’s like second or third to die too. This is blasphemy.

Czech building soundproofing is next level. we just moved from a nightclub to the next floor and not so much as an oon tiss oon tiss. I’m am very relieved they didn’t turn the czech republic and it’s people/vampires into a russia!lite stereotype. Eastern europe isn’t a a mthyical place that got absorbed either into “real europe” or russia just so ya know it’s a rather big place with lots of different cultures who will kick you if you get them mixed up.

This entire long drag of a sequence established that the crew are total idiots who do not listen to eachother. Towards the start someone yells “don’t waste bullets it’s useless”, ten minutes of bullets later, they have one down, one bitten and a dead reaper to autopsy. The autopsy is somehow cooler than the alive creatures. Only blade, whistler and the ladyboss vamp actually learn anything from this as everyone else will continue to try and kill the vamps with anything but UV rays for the entirety of the rest of this stupid film.

Did i mention that the science of humans vs vamps vs reapers has a less sound explanation than Stephanie Meyer’s vampirism. I am not rewatching the dialogue to point out the absurd use of real science words but all *wrong* as I’d prefer to not grind my teeth to dust.

The blue led light reaper death effects are so *off*. It’s such an inorganic choice to have your supervamps sizzle neon blue. This movie is full of stupid cgi choices btw. The gravity for bodies is way off, the uv light bombs are modelled on fire explosions instead of light. This is so dumb. Wuxia films from the late 90s had special effects lightyears ahead of this junk on smaller budgets so there’s no explanation other than hiring a naf studio.

So Ron Perlman drops the gun he’s been firing all film long to take on Blade... with a sword. Neuronal connections are dying for me to type this. Movie making people watched this scene multiple times and still greenlit it.

death by sunlight is very different for vampire ladyboss and udo kier’s blade 1 character. he explodes, she elegantly turns into dust. ah another unrealistic beauty standard for women. Elder vamp looked nothing like the other elder vamps from blade1 either. consistency is for nerds i guess. i am said angry nerd. This film took a dump on it’s established canon and that’s not counting 15 whole minutes on the unnecessary retcon which could have been fixed with two lines of dialogue.

Gotta say it ends on a high note, The final scene is magnificent, you know what’s coming from the moment the dude walks into a peepshow but it’s still *chefs kiss*.

is this movie worth watching to see Kris Kristoffersen call Ron Perlman a nipple head? only if youtube dies.