#i love charlotte for this line delivery
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Western NC Is Not Okay
Cell service, phone lines, roads, and other infrastructure have all been damaged or destroyed, especially way up in the highest elevations.
Loved ones who live here may or may not be able to send or receive messages.
Many places out here are unrecognizable from what they looked like just a few days ago.
Most families are without power, and panic buying of food and fuel have already started.
Many restaurants and grocery stores are either running out of food, are without power themselves, or have been damaged too much to function.
Many are fleeing east to Gastonia, Charlotte, and further toward the coast, where power is more stable and food is at least a bit more reachable.
Out where I am, about an hour west of Gastonia, I was lucky to find a friend with power so I can use my CPAP and charge my phone. Lots of people like me are relying on cell phones as their sole source of communication, but with cell towers messed up and hilly terrain, even that is spotty at best.
I am doing better than most. My house is undamaged as of now, our cars work, and I am in a safe shelter with power, but even so, I am still worried about being able to access food and gas once our small supplies are gone. We're currently limiting driving to emergency measures only, but here in the south, public transit is simply not a thing...the closest train station, for instance, is an hour away in Gastonia. Biking is also not safe with all the downed trees and power lines, plus just the sheer distance between places and the lack of bike lanes and sidewalks in general.
As car and gas dependent as we all are, not being able to buy gas anywhere reasonably close is a huge problem. I sure hope deliveries of gas can be made to this area soon, because that makes finding food much easier. I don't have any problem driving the 50-60 miles to Charlotte to find food, but it will become an issue if I sit in heavy traffic and lose my little supply of fuel that way.
Honestly I know I personally underprepared for this storm, but I also had no idea how bad our infrastructure is without power and gas. Everything's electronic and now stores have had to go back to cash only...which meant we drove 2 hours around yesterday trying to find a working ATM and/or a store that took cards. At least people are being fairly gracious in stores so far, but desperation can quickly change that.
So, yeah...WNC is not okay, and because of the conditions, a lot of people can't even get the word out. I'm one of the lucky ones with a working cell signal and relative peace to be able to communicate, and I have the hope of being able to go home to an undamaged home within days. (I don't know yet how vain that hope is....both weather flood warnings and power outage advisories keep being pushed back.)
In any case, travel to or through WNC in the next few days/weeks/months is basically a no-go, especially for places like Asheville and Boone. Down the mountain where we are, things are a bit better here, but it's still a developing situation. Hoping for the best. 💞💔💞
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I couldn't agree more with you. I'm not entirely hating their fight, I was so excited to see it, but in the end, it dragged on, and it was filled with cumbersome elements (pointless shapeshifting and swinging swords with no damage inflicted), and there was no emotional payoff.
I was waiting to see their "cosmic connection" being acknowledged by both characters, but it's like the writers categorically refused to make Galadriel admit for one second that what they had was real, which would make their bond even more horrifying knowing who Sauron is and what he has done and will do.
Sauron torturing and killing Celebrimbor was devastating, it was beyond traumatizing, and yet Celebrimbor pierced Sauron so thoroughly he made him lose control, and they both cried. It was a gut punch, but it was emotionally satisfying.
I didn't feel that with Sauron and Galadriel, and I don't care that Charlotte Brandström said that Galadriel and Sauron 'love' each other, and I say that as someone who enjoys haladriel (doomed lady of light/dark lord dynamic). Show, don't tell.
I understand my take is very unpopular, but the "heal yourself" line really sounded like a "go fuck yourself", and I don't think it was earned at that point, not truly. It's cliché, but I think even the "over my dead body you shall have my ring" would have worked better than that line. :/
Hello there, Nonnie! Thanks for sharing your thoughts, I love this kind of insightful exchange. If you're the same Anon from the previous ask then thanks for coming back!
"No emotional payoff" yeah, I couldn't have said it better, my friend. But that's not exclusive to the Saurondriel reunion: most character arcs and storylines were concluded the same way (notable exception being Celebrimbor and Annatar). After rewatching the last two episodes and picking scenes apart I'm mostly certain that:
There were reshoots;
They filmed a LOT more content than what was aired, and that missing content left clear gaps in the narrative;
Many scenes that made it to the finale were done in a hurry, including most of Galadriel x Sauron fight and, I believe, the Stranger confrontation with the Dark Wizard;
The good points of the Saurondriel reunion are drowning in a sea of uninspired action gimmicks and stale dialogue;
Either they genuinely didn't know what to do with the Saurondriel confrontation (hence the uninspired and recycled dialogue) or they decided (or were pressured) to tone down from what they originally intended to do, leave things as ambiguous as possible and not commit to a clear path (hence all the narrative mixed signals and tentative hints of elrondriel);
The Galadriel we got in the finale was, for the most part, Young Adult Action Franchise Protagonist Galadriel. She stood out from the emotional backdrop like an incredibly 2D sore thumb made from witty remarks and don't f*ck with me attitude;
All of the above leads me to believe that the showrunners and writers are having real trouble with all the different storylines. They might know what story they want to tell, but they surely are struggling with pacing, development and execution within the screentime they have available. Some external factors might be weighing down on the narrative decisions as well.
P.S.: I hate the 'heal yourself' as well. It's not about the idea in itself, it's all about setting and delivery. There are better ways to convey the message than with that 'Pwned! Galadriel out! *mic drop*' cringe approach they went for.
#the rings of power#the rings of power season 2#trop season 2#trop analysis#galadriel#sauron#saurondriel#celebrimbor#the stranger aka gandalf#the dark wizard#anon ask
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The Phantom of the Opera | Seoul, South Korea | 조팬텀 x 손크리 Review 4/6
October 13, 2023 - Matinée
The Phantom of the Opera | 조승우 Jo Seung-woo
Christine Daaé | 손지수 Sohn Ji-soo
Raoul, Vicomte de Chagny | 송원근 Song Won-geun
Carlotta Giudicelli | 이지영 Lee Ji-young
Final boss of ticketing, Jo Seung-woo! The last one I snatched out of the four in one single ticketing after an hour of suffering. He's a pretty big actor who sells out shows quickly and has also been in dramas and movies. By the time you make it into one of his schedules' seating charts, the seats are all grayed out. So I had to keep refreshing and playing fucking whack-a-mole with the single color specks for any released seats that would pop up. One time I even even made it all the way to confirming payment and it said someone else took it. I actually thought I was about to turn into the Joker. But I am stronger! I won! And after seeing his performance in person? It was worth the fight.
I'll start this off with this tweet:
Shoutout to the guy next to me that was in shambles crying through his binoculars I hope he lived. Admittedly I did get teary-eyed myself! Which is quite an accomplishment even if it wasn't full blown tears like when seeing Ju-taek because I thought I was immune to this show after so long! But this is like uber sad pathetic wet cat man. My seat was actually a great unobstructed view with lots of space in the aisle. The Charlotte is so small that absolutely any view here is a good one especially if you have a pair of opera glasses/binoculars. Also I was safe from the piercing screams of the ballet girls! Hurray!
Hannibal Rehearsal
I really thought "I'll only use my binoculars for the major scenes with the trio because it's too tiring to hold them up", but that was a lie because I loved observing the supporting cast and ensemble too much. This time I watched for the smaller details like Christine quietly singing along to herself on the side while Carlotta was singing 'Think of Me'. Both Christines do it, but I remembered to look for it this show :') Kim Ah-seon had been clearly still recovering from being sick the previous performances, but I think she finally had her strength again this show. I love how elegant and dignified she is and her strong line delivery
The Mirror
Hearing Raoul's voice made the Phantom shoot a dark glare towards the dressing room door. Then, with the slightest smirk, he invited Christine into the mirror. Is somebody proud they managed to swipe the girl from the pretty young rich boy tonight? Ha
First Lair | POTO / MOTN / STYDI
Even if he's like...the most sad sewer creature-y of the Phantoms he's still got his charm okay! His voice isn't very strong, but I think he was able to handle it well enough during my show. He sounds older than he is actually is to me. How do I elaborate without making it sound backhanded? Even though he struggles in some areas with his singing, I think his vocal color is still suited for the energy his Phantom has. I'm just going to have to hope you understand me 😭 Whatever he lacks in that department, he certainly makes up for it in acting. It seems like he never stops onstage, like he's always making so many little choices at every moment. So it was a bit hard to keep track of everything he did because he was constantly doing something and was really immersed. I liked the sort of dreamy delivery of the beginning lines like the whispered way he sings "어둠...속에 - in the darkness". Halfway through the song he seems to build a little more enthusiasm seeing how open she is to him. He used more soft hand movements to act out certain parts of the lyrics like both his ear and then his body when he sang 들어, 느껴 - hear it, feel it". It's like really wanted to paint a clear picture of his mysterious beautiful dark world of music for Christine. I liked when he did a gesture with his hands like energy bursting free when he sang his big note in “네 영혼 다시 태어날 순간 / The moment your soul will be reborn” (let your soul take you where you long to be). This version of the line is unique to his Phantom. He smiled a lot and although he had a bit of a slight odd nervous energy, he still managed to maintain eye contact with her most of the time. Once he finally held her, he rested his head on her shoulder and whispered his words into her ear. 👀 He looked really worried and tried to catch her when she fell. After putting the cloak on her, I think he went to touch her, but stopped himself feeling a bit nervous. He put his hand on his chest instead to finish his final note
"Fake it til you make it" was working so well until it wasn't. Whatever confidence he built up during MOTN...bye. He's a little scary at the end when he shrieks out the 'Curse you!' and an extra 'No!' But most of all he's just really sad. When he asked her "what did you hope to see?" while chasing her, his voice sounded hurt and there was fear in his eyes. Like why, why did you have to be curious when I actually had it under control somehow? He slid slowly to the ground in defeat halfway through the song when he began the crawl. He eventually stopped making an effort to cover his face on his way toward her. Maybe he was so destroyed he didn't have the energy to. I liked how natural his acting felt here. It was tragic without being over the top. But I felt this about a lot of his choices in general
All I Ask of You (Reprise)
What a sad little man, completely a wreck. He covered his ears pleading "그만 제발 그만 크리스틴 다에 ! - Stop, please stop, Christine Daaé!" There should be a Christine Daaé name drop counter for Jo Phantom. He loves to say her name!!
Why So Silent? / Notes II
Taking focus away from the main roles for a moment, André is sooo extra stressed by this point. He fumbled the score when the Phantom tossed it to him. He does this every show, but this time I only just noticed him quickly doing sign of the cross during Notes II when they were opening up letters. He got super jumpy Also, Firmin and André start laughing to each other and making silly gestures making fun of Piangi when the Phantom starts attacking him in his note, but as soon as he addresses them, oh it suddenly really wasn't funny anymore!
The Point of No Return
Somebody help this man he already got jumpy simply just hearing her start to sing. 🤭 JSW Phantom seemed like the weakest one here across from Christine. He’s writhing terribly and gripping himself He was startled the most when she was close behind and he began to tremble. But when Christine finally touches him he moaned a little. It wasn't very loud, but it definitely was there and he threw his head back. His hands reached up to his face as he looked up before he finally held hers. This proposal was a mess. He got down on one knee at one point, but then he got too freaked out and shot right back up again as if he realized it was too vulnerable of a position to be in. When he was unmasked, he didn't scream and it was actually really heartbreaking to me. Like I do love a good scream, but ouch. His face dropped and he froze in complete shock looking like he'd been stabbed in the heart. His eyes darted around for a moment seeing everyone watching him like a trapped animal. It took him a moment to snap out of his daze and run off with her.
Down Once More / Final Lair
After throwing Christine, he almost looked regretful like he realized he was too hard, but then tried to push forward. Because he was fueled by anger, he didn't hide his face away as much like usual. It was still clear he was very actively disgusted by it. He touched his face for a moment after he let go of her and then immediately wiped his hand on his thigh. This performance he was actually able to look into her eyes when giving her the bouquet instead of looking down in shame. When he picked up the mirror bride to toss her he sang his lines into her ear in a whisper and actually very gently just plopped her on the ground instead of throwing her. I love this weird little detail I won't lie...it was kinda cute and silly that he had to hop a little to reach Won-geun's neck with the lasso haha. It's not supposed to be cute but I find it cute okay. He covered his ears while crying when she was coming over to him before the kiss :( After the first kiss it looked like he put his face in her shoulder for a moment, but still didn't have his hands on her. He seemed to give in a little for a second, but then took her hand off his head, looked at it for a moment, and gently wiped it with his sleeve like he couldn't let her have his filth taint her... When he approached Raoul with the candle, he could almost barely be heard whispering "Raoul de Chagny..." slowly in a chilling way before releasing him and turning away. I think he harbors the most bitterness towards Raoul out of the Phantoms. He's the most insecure one, and Raoul is everything he'll never be. He fell and pressed his head into the ground roughly while shaking when he screamed for them to leave him. And his scream was so painful and raw I don't know how he lets that out. He stayed like this for a while before he crawled clumsily and quickly towards the monkey in desperate need of any kind of comfort. He put his forehead head against it, closed his eyes tightly and held it so closely while he sang Masquerade. Christine came back and he tried to fix his hair and clothes before going to her I think SJS Christine was a good match for his interpretation of the Phantom because of how unconditionally compassionate she is. He was very fragile and she's very caring and gentle. I think she really did view JSW Phantom as her guardian and guide and had a very pure deep kind of love for him. Maybe not romantic love, but it was very strong either way. She watched him closely in the boat as she left, but he was facing the other way gripping her veil, repeating her name over and over. He turned at the last moment and called out "Christine Daaé!" one more time to her running over to take in the sight of her one last time. His final lines are actually different from the other Phantoms. It only just hit me the other day that they're the same as the lines from the original production in 2001-2. No idea why it took me that long to make the connection, but I found it interesting enough to note!
I really want to do musical promo time, but I really don't think what's on youtube does him justice. So let me just say his 2019 Jekyll/Hyde + Sweeney Todd and his Hedwig? Incredible. There's a reason for that ticket selling power he has and I say that completely unbiased!
Also lol at the person in front of me on the plane to Seoul that was watching his movie 'The Classic' because I was like "oh hey it's you I'm seeing you in a few days"
#i love u pathetic little wet cat man#the phantom of the opera#오페라의 유령#조승우#손지수#송원근#cho seung woo#jo seung woo#sohn ji soo#song won geun#poto korea#poto#poto review
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okay fir starkid
whats ur favorite song and why?
who’s ur favorite character? and whats ur favorite moment from them
were you sad or happy with the ending, and what do you think it contributes?
(assuming u mean hatchetfield since thats my obsession atm)
omg okay so. i have so many favorite songs its ridiculous . . . . so i'll color code them. if the words r in color it means im still on this question 😭
from tgwdlm i LOVE join us and die, cup of roasted/poisoned coffee + not your seed
join us and die because it just feels so. CREEPY !!!!!!! and the scene itself is so great i love that charlotte's guts r spillin outta her eww
cup of roasted/poisoned coffee because again VERY CREEPY. and the choreo is so nice to watch. not to mention their VOCALS when they sing the last "hey mr. business how do ya, how do ya, how do ya doooooo ?" like omgggg
not your seed because i relate to it a bit AND the scene is so important 2 me. when alice says its "all your fault" while addressing bill . . . . she wasnt thinking abt bill when she thought that originally she was most likely saying that to herself and UGH my baby 😭
from black friday i <3 caliform.i.a + do you wanna play
caliform.i.a is js such a sweet song to me idk. you can tell how much lex and ethan care abt each other and hannah and and and. UGHHHH. in my mind they made it to california idc idc
do you wanna play because. EVIL. WOMEN !!!!!!! becky is so hot i mean what who wrote that. seriously tho i just love her voice sm UGGHHHH
from npmd my faves r hatchet town, nerdy prudes must die (omg they said the thing !!) + just for once
hatchet town because. good lord. THE VOCALSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS. send tweet
nerdy prudes must die bc the scene ?? the line delivery ?? the peak villainy radiating off of man jagerman ?? hello ?? omg ?? im in love ??
just for once because its from the pov of a character in an in universe play but it also shows us how ruth really feels. she just wants to be seen. me n her r twinning frfr
i have a lot of faves (becky, linda, ruth, richie, paul, zoey, bill, etc etc) but background characters always capture my heart so im gonna go with ziggy. they r sooooo important 2 me and they barely even talk omg. when they said "so is that a crime?" to being called out for being a drug dealer . . . . oh ziggy they could never make me hate u
i was happy with every ending !! i feel like theyre all so perfect especially black friday's. they always leave you wanting more
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Female Reader x Rooster
Time: Post-Top gun: Maverick
Y/n Blackwood - L/n, daughter of Charlotte "Charlie" Blackwood. Y/n took a strong interest in planes from a young age. Knowing her father was an esteemed pilot drew her even further into the navy. Quickly, she became one of the best solo pilots and graduating at the top of her class at Top Gun.
Her next mission? Return to Top Gun, Face certain death, romantic interests, and finally, her thought-to-be-dead, father.
This book contains strong language and sexual content that may be sensitive readers under the age of 18
This story was originally posted on Wattpad, follow me on there for faster updates. I have published a non-binary version of this story published there for those who do not identify as female or use she/her pronouns. It will follow the exact same story line. Link to Wattpad Account Link to the Non-Binary version
Master list
In Love
Sleeping in felt weird. I woke up with a heavy sleep feeling in my eyes that caused me to rub them fairly roughly. I sat up in my bed and stretched my arms up wide.
I had went to bed in my undergarments (being a white tank top and long pants) with my hair in a tight bun that caused me to wake up with a small headache. I immediately took my hair out of my bun and shook it out.
I heard my phone buzz next to my bed. I got up to look at it and read the text from my step-father.
I smiled at the nickname. If anybody else called me that, it would be a bad day for them. But my step father and i bonded over watching game of thrones together which is where the nickname originated from. I sent him a quick reply back saying I missed him and that I'd call later tonight.
I sat down at the chair at my desk and decided to go through my phone a little. I noticed a twitter notification that Hangman had tagged me in a post. I reluctantly opened the notification, but ended up smiling at his thoughtfulness.
I closed my phone, deciding to thank him in person today since I was actually able to. I quickly got dressed and grabbed my hairbrush and toothbrush to make my way to the bathroom.
Once I had finished getting ready I made my way to the cafeteria. As I entered I smiled and waved at everyone who greeted me with a good morning. Unbeknownst to me, Hangman was lurking in the shadows because moments later I was picked up and spun around in the air.
"Happy birthday!" He shouted while holding an exaggerated note to extend the word 'day'. I couldn't help but let out a laugh and turn around to face him as he put me down. I punched him in the shoulder playfully.
"Thank you for posting that embarrassing photo." I teased.
"Isn't that what you're supposed to do on birthdays?"
"What? It's your birthday?" Phoenix stood up from the table and walked over to give me a hug. I wrapped my arms around her and smiled.
"Why didn't you tell us?" Fanboy asked while taking his turn in giving me a hug.
"I don't like making a big deal out of it."
Rooster stood up from his place at the bench. He walked over to me and gave me a hug, ducking his head down by my ear. "You could have told me that your birthday was soon."
"You never asked."
Rooster chuckled as he pulled his head back. He gave me a quick kiss on top of the head. "Happy birthday."
I felt the heat rise to my face as I smiled at him. He had a wide, toothless grin on his face while looking down at me.
"We've gotta do something tonight." Fanboy exclaimed with excitement.
"I agree. But what? We're stuck here." Payback stated.
Everybody remained silent, trying to think about what to do.
"Food delivery?" Bob suggested. We all turned to look at him. He seemed to get flustered as he was now expected to explain himself.
"Um, last week I got some food DoorDashed to the front gates. They're not allowed to come on base but we can meet them there?"
The group looked around at each other, smiles slowly spreading on their faces. "Bob you're a genius." Rooster clasped him on the shoulder and they exchanged a smile.
"A genius?" Maverick's voice alerted us at the door way. He smiled and looked around his crew. "Why's that?"
"It's Wolf's birthday. We're gonna have some things delivered tonight to celebrate." Hangman explained.
Mavericks face fell into shock as he looked over at me. "It's your birthday?"
All I could manage was to nod with a smile. I felt guilty not telling him that my birthday was soon. He was my father after all. Birthdays just weren't my thing. I ended up either crying because of other people or spending them alone. I don't think I've had a good birthday since I was 10.
Maverick walked over to me and extended his arms. I smiled and accepted his invitation to a hug. His hug was quick, but tight and loving. He drew himself back while keeping his hands on my shoulders. "Happy birthday." He said sincerely.
"Thank you." I replied with a smile.
"Well, besides that, we're ready to start training. Hangman and Phoenix and Bob, you guys will be in the air first. The rest of the teams can utilize the screening room to go over your partners flight patterns and study the mission pattern together."
I listened to Maverick's instructions, but I couldn't help notice Phoenix and rooster off to the side whispering to each other and smiling. It was too soon for jealousy, I shouldn't be jealous. She was his friend long before I came around. I still felt an ache in my heart watching them be so close and laughing and smiling with each other.
Once Maverick was done talking the two split. Rooster immediately came over to me with a soft smile on his face. "We should use the screening room and look at flight logs. We can also review the mission plan."
I pushed my feelings of jealousy aside and smiled. "Yes, sure let's go." We started our walk to the screening room and he held the door open for me when we entered.
"You know," he started, shutting the door behind us. "I'm kind of mad you didn't tell me your birthday was in two days. I feel like an asshole, I would have gotten you in a present."
"No, Rooster seriously. It's not a big deal." I reassured him. "I don't even like to celebrate my birthday, so don't-" Rooster had walked over to me while I talked with a smug smirk on his face until we were inches apart. He put his hands on either side of my face and ducked down to kiss me. The kiss was simple and sweet, the soft touch of his lips and the rough, scratching feeling of his mustache. He pulled back and looked down at me face.
I grabbed his wrists, stroking them with my thumbs and leaning into the feeling of his course hands on my face. My heart beat faster and I felt a flutter in my stomach. I don't remember the last time that I had felt a feeling like this. "Happy birthday, sweetheart."
"Don't call me that." The truth was it made a warmth spread across my body. The nickname made me smile like an idiot, and I loved it.
"What? Why?" Rooster protested. I pushed him away playfully while I walked over to one of the computer desks to load up the program.
"I'm not sweet."
"What? Come on, you're the sweetest person I know." He followed me over to the computer, a sarcastic tone in his voice.
"Shut up." I growled at him, typing in my password to the system.
Rooster plopped down next to me in the chair, kicking his feet up onto the table. "See, honey couldn't be sweeter."
"Are you always this insufferably romantic?"
"You'll learn to love it." Rooster swiveled his chair so his upper body was closer to mine. He reached his head over to give me a quick kiss on the cheek before swiveling back to his original position.
•••
Many many hours had come and gone. Rooster kept me locked in the screening room practically all day. After studying each others flight patterns we hopped into the flight simulator and messed around. We played many games of 'try to crash your planes together while flying with your eyes closed'.
Now, we were landing our real planes after our seemingly unproductive 30 minutes of flying. Maverick had us do a series of drill formations and synchronized flying just to get comfortable with each others reaction time. I don't want to brag, but Rooster and I were flawless.
I took my helmet off my head, thankful to get out of the sweaty bowl. I thanked the landing pad coordinators that would be taking our aircrafts onto the standby carrier and met up with Rooster and Maverick on the deck.
"You two did great." Maverick complimented us. "I'm not worried about you two in the slightest. From here on just work on the formations."
"Thanks Mav. Hey what's Amelia doing later? I want to give her a call." Rooster asked.
"Penny told me she's doing homework." Maverick replied.
"Well," I interrupted their conversation. "I'm going to go in and change."
"No wait!" Rooster grabbed my wrist to prevent me from walking away. "We have a surprise for you."
"A surprise?" I questioned.
"Yes." Rooster replied. "Go get changed but Meet me outside the cafeteria immediately after."
I smiled, immediately excited about the surprise. I rushed off to my room and got changed into more comfortable clothes. I still had to dress for on call measures so I was in a white tank top and a pair of loose fitting shorts but it was better than the thick, scratchy uniform.
I walked with a pep in my step down the hallways and rounded the corner towards the cafeteria. Rooster was there, leaning against the wall. He smiled when he saw me and pushed himself up.
"So, what's the surprise?" I asked. He smiled and stepped behind me. He placed his hands over my eyes to cover them.
"Open the door!" Rooster raised his voice. I heard the latch open and the push of a door. Rooster walked me blind into the cafeteria. My heart raced with anticipation.
"Ready?"
"I think so." I replied.
Rooster removed his hands from my eyes. I opened them to see all the pilots wearing party hats. "Surprise!" Everybody shouted. The lunchroom tables had a large variety of soda and snack foods on them along with a tray of cupcakes. Fanboy walked over to me and put a party hat on top of my head, the kind with the elastic string that goes under your chin.
"You did all this for me?" I asked, feeling the emotions well up inside of me.
"Why do you think we had Rooster trap you in the screening room all day?" Phoenix asked, bringing me over a drink of my favorite soda. I took the cup gratefully.
"I don't know what to say."
"Don't say anything, stuff your face with cupcakes and chips and let's watch a movie." Rooster grabbed my shoulders and shook them a little while he talked. I agreed, filing my plate with the different snacks that were provided.
Bob had chosen the movie Step Brothers from the selection of movies that the closest Walmart would ship to us. It was a ridiculous pick, but I couldn't remember the last time I had sat down and watched a movie.
About halfway through the movie I felt my phone buzz. I was getting a call from my step dad. I had stepped away to answer the phone.
"Hey Harry. I'm sorry I didn't call earlier."
'That's okay. I understand you're busy. How was your birthday?'
"It was great. Everybody pulled together a little surprise for me. We're watching a movie now."
'That's fantastic. Do you have an update on the mission?'
I felt my heart sink and I swallowed hard. I covered the phone with my hand to try and prevent the others from hearing.
"Yeah, We're on call. We're supposed to get the call sometime this week." There was silence on the other end of the phone. I heard him take a deep breath.
'Well, I hope everything goes well. You'll be careful, right?'
"I'm always careful. I'll talk to you after it's done."
'Alright. Well I'll let you get back to it. I Love you.'
"Love you too dad. Bye."
'Bye, little wolf."
I hung up the phone and sighed.
"Dad?"
I turned around to see Rooster had joined me in the back of the room. "My step father. Calling to say happy birthday."
"That's sweet. I was about to call Amelia, do you want to join me?" Rooster asked, taking out his phone. I smiled and nodded enthusiastically.
Rooster dialed Amelia's number. It only rang twice before she picked up the phone.
'Hey Brad!' Amelia chirped from the other side of the phone.
"Hey Amelia. I'm here with y/n."
'Hi y/n!'
"Hey Amelia." I responded with a laugh to my tone. She sounded so excited to talk to us.
"Guess what? Today is y/n's birthday." Rooster looked over at me with a smirk on his face, to which I rolled my eyes.
'No way! Happy birthday!'
"Thank you." I responded. I looked over at Rooster. His face had fallen slightly as he cleared his throat to continue.
"I assume Penny told you about us going on the mission soon?" There was a pause on the other side of the line, I could hear the smallest huff of air come through the speaker.
'Yeah, she did. I'm really nervous. Will you guys be okay?'
Rooster and I exchanged looks. It was impossible to know that for sure. I felt prepared, but there was still the underlying nervousness of knowing that death might be lurking around the corner. Rooster looked down at the phone, his eyes looked lost. I decided to jump in and answer for him.
"Luckily, Roos- Bradley and I were put on a team together. We make a good team, we'll be fine." I looked over at rooster who mouthed thank you to me.
'You guys were put on a team together? Does Pete know about the date? How was the date? Did he take you somewhere nice? Oh my gosh did you kiss?'
"Amelia keep your voice down!" Rooster whisper shouted into the phone. I covered my mouth to prevent myself from breaking down laughing.
'I'm sorry! I have to know!'
"Pete does not know and it needs to stay that way." Rooster said sternly.
"The date was great. I already agreed to go on a second one. And..." I exchanged a glance with Rooster, both of us knowing more than just a kiss happened. "Yes. He kissed me."
'Damn Bradshaw, who knew you had game.'
"Amelia!" Rooster scolded her. This time I couldn't hold it back. I laughed at their sibling-like banter. "Well we should get back to it. I just wanted to check in."
'Okay. Promise me you guys will be careful?'
"We promise." Rooster and I said in unison.
We said our goodbyes and then hung up the phone. We turned around to see that the movie had just ended and everyone was getting up from their spots. We all cleaned up the mess and did our best to put everything back where it was.
I said my goodbyes and thank you's to all of my friends that helped my birthday be something special. As I made my way back to my room, I checked my phone. I saw the notifications of posts from the pilots. I smiled, feeling the love and appreciation from my fellow peers. For the first time in a long time, I went to sleep happy on my birthday.
Today has been a fantastic day.
Next Chapter
#top gun smut#top gun movie#top gun fic#top gun fanfiction#bradley bradshaw smut#bradley bradshaw#rooster bradshaw fic#rooster bradshaw#rooster x y/n#rooster x reader#rooster fanfic#pete mitchell#fanboy top gun#hangman top gun#jake seresin#bradley rooster bradshaw#bradley bradshaw fluff#bradley bradshaw fic#bradley bradshaw fanfiction#bradley bradshaw angst#bradley bradshaw x y/n#bradley bradshaw x oc#bradley bradshaw x reader#bradley bradshaw x female reader#bradley bradhsaw x you#bradley bradshaw fanfic#top gun rooster#rooster top gun#bradley bradshaw imagine#bradley bradshaw drabble
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For the past two years, I've been introducing a friend to Wizard School Mysteries by live reading the first two books over Discord, and she's loved everything about them so far (especially certain characters; I can confirm that Fafgander, Dhenregirr, Demonbone and Professor Spidergrin officially have the monsterfucker seal of approval). However, one line from Book 2 stuck out during one of these readings that made me wonder whether the impression we got was due to my own delivery or intentional on your part.
I reading the Needlessly Gendered Night Out chapter, and I ended up delivering Polybeus asking James to be his wingman as if it were a marriage proposal. On one hand, I just thought it was the funniest way to read that line at the time (which my friend's reaction confirmed), but on the other, it ties in so well with Margot's suspicions of Polybeus having a crush on James back in the first book that I can't help but wonder if that was the connotation you had in mind in the first place...
Well, firstly, thank you for that! I can't overstate how much I appreciate it when people spread the word about my books, and the idea of someone doing a dramatic reading of them in particular just makes the novelist AND theater kid in me very happy.
I've definitely written Polybeus and James's interactions to be very flirty, particularly on Polybeus's end. Polybeus is the Rival archetype, after all, and if your Leader of the Group and the Rival don't have some shipping sparks going on, you're probably not writing them right. So even as the nature of that rivalry evolves into something more friendly/healthy in book 2, it remains very flirty because Polybeus is, on some level, kind of obsessed with James.
Now, at the moment the exact nature of that relationship is intentionally vague. Perhaps not from James's end - we kinda know where he's leaning romantically by this point, right? - but for Polybeus it, like many things in his life, is in flux. A huge part of Polybeus's arc, especially in book 2, is figuring out exactly who he is and what he really wants.
Polybeus comes from Mediterra, specifically the part of Mediterra that's based on the Greek version of Greco-Roman mythology rather than the Roman version, which means homosexuality/bisexuality is pretty normalized where he comes from. His favorite hero, Achilles, is explicitly a gay man in Midgaheim canon. So Polybeus isn't unaware of homosexual attraction, nor does he have any reason to think he can't feel it. So him not knowing exactly why he's obsessed with James isn't a sort of "guy who's been raised to think he's straight doesn't realize he's gay" situation. He's been raised in a culture where people are kinda assumed to be bisexual by default.
But he's also raised in a culture with a strong emphasis on platonic homosocial relationships as well - warrior bonds and the like. Your closest buddy on the battlefield is just as important a relationship to a Mediterran like Polybeus as your romantic partner - and yeah, for some people those two are one and the same, but for others they aren't.
And then there's also just the fact that James is, in many ways, exactly who Polybeus wishes he was. James is clever like Odysseus, marked for greatness by a higher power, and capable of attracting friends and followers with what appears to be relative ease. He's confident (or so Polybeus assumes) and strong and brave, all traits Polybeus fully believes he himself lacks.
So what is the source of the obsession? Romantic desire? A warrior's bond? Envy? Polybeus himself doesn't know, just as he doesn't know what most of his other desires are or why he has them. But it's something for him to unravel as our story goes along.
And you know, we also have to take into account the fact that James isn't the only person Polybeus flirts with. He's infatuated with Gretchen too, even if he expresses it clumsily, and he's got a strange friendship budding with Charlotte, not to mention the somewhat Helga Patacki-ish treatment he gives Ivan. Polybeus contains multitudes, really.
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Aftersun
Movies watched in 2023
Aftersun (2022, UK/USA)
Director & Writer: Charlotte Wells
Mini-review:
What a lovely movie. I went in only knowing that it starred Paul Mescal and it was about a little girl and his father on vacation, and I was very pleasantly surprised. It took me back to when I was the same age as the main character, to that time when things start getting confusing for you and when summers always felt so special and sort of magical. And yet, at the same time, the whole movie feels so melancholic and there's this low-key sadness that flows through it from beginning to end.
But, the thing that truly makes this movie one of a kind is the acting. Frankie Corio is simply phenomenal. I can't think of many peformances by child actors that show such incredible naturalness. There wasn't one fake expression or line delivery. This girl will go far, no doubt. And then there's Paul Mescal. We all know how good he is and Aftersun just confirms he's one of the biggest talents of his generation. Their chemistry is also incredible, I would absolutely belive if you told me they were father and daughter in real life. Also, the movie was shot in very interesting and refreshing ways, which makes me curious about Charlotte Wells' future work, cause this one doesn't feel like her first movie at all (in a good way).
#aftersun#charlotte wells#paul mescal#frankie corio#celia rowlson hall#drama#family#award winning#awards#oscars#academy awards#movie#film#movies watched in 2023#summer
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DUDE YOURE SO RIGHT!!
Joshua Kilimnik killed it as Mendel!! And youre right he was the perfect amount of insufferable as any Mendel should be. He sincerely became my favorite version of the character.
I personally didn't like Taylor Long as Marvin at all tho!! I dont know why, but he didnt feel like a Marvin to me. Hes acting felt cheaper than other Marvins and the tension of his and whizzer relationship on Act 1 was completely lost on me (Thrill Of First Love and The Chess Game suffered from this so much)
He made me feel close to nothing the entire show, which is an extremely jarring change from other actors (My favorites being Michael Rupert, 2004 Northwestern University Marvin and Christian Borle). I agree that one of the reasons for that is that his voice was a bit much too, but i believe his acting was also lacking.
I loved this Trina tho!! Olivia Daniels had such great chemistry with Taylor Long and Joshua Kilimnik and her acting was on point most of the time. I totally agree she didnt feel as manic as she should have during Act 1 but i didnt mind it too much.
I didnt hate Randy Lei Chang as Whizzer but I didnt loved him either. He hits the notes and all but i feel like he was a somewhat flat version of the character. I have a problem with his lack of subtle acting, opting for really exaggerated body movements, facial expressions and line delivery, which didnt fit the character more often than not.
Mostly i disliked Luca Mcphee, its was a very different interpretation of the character and even if the acting was good, i just couldn't warm up to the drastic change, it felt out of character and out of place in the story. Tho i predict this opinion will change the more i watch this production or the more i think about it. (For some reason i have a very bad issue with her line delivery of "If im a bitch, well, i am what i am", cant explain it, wont explain it)
I really enjoyed Mona Hillis as Cordelia, only problem is that i felt she didnt have a lot of chemistry with Charlotte and such, but shes overall an amazing singer and plays the character really well.
Jason is a hit or miss in any production, but k believe Max Goodman was a hit. He wasnt as good (or as sassy) as my favorite Jasons (Anthony Rosenthal and Thomas Creatore) but he definitely stands out in a good way. Hes also the cutest Jason so theres that!
And ill mourn the loss of the chess set still the day i die. Even if its creative in its use of the staging and all, The Chess Game didnt feel right without it (i especially love the 2004 Northwestern University version, i think everyone should see it... just saying)
But anyhow i hope you enjoy the rest of the show if you havent finished it yet!! Its a pretty good show as it is, im just a fellow nitpicker!!
Gonna be a hater for a bit, enjoy the negativity about the new falsettos production from bow tie productions, no hate to the peeps but I want to rant and my falsettos irl friend is busy.
Here’s what I liked:
Jason was actually played by a kid!!
Randy Lei Chang really embodied Whizzer well, though I think his performance was lacking at times.
Joshua Kilmnik played a great Mendel, just the right amount of insufferable (again great job)
Marvin and Whizzer had great chemistry
Taylor Long is an amazing singer (more on this later)
Choreo was well done
The set was cool
Costumes were well done, not very 80s but embodied the characters very well
Jason actually did a great job, especially for being a kid
Mendels little crowd interaction at the start of act 2
I liked March of the falsettos a lot, especially Mendel and Whizzer (will also touch on later)
Nice detail to have Mendel put a menorah in “the home” during making a home
The SCREAMs for the lesbians were amazing
Trina and Marvin had great chemistry together (as in great chemistry for hating each other)
Now for my hating <3
I’m pretty sure Olivia daniels was the only actual Jewish actor (maybe Marvin?) in a musical about Jewish people in the 80s so that’s something, that’s not a negative per say but its just a little disappointing Y’know? But I’m also not Jewish so I can’t really say anything
On that same note Trina’s actual voice was not great at times, she fell flat and offkey at times, but everyone’s only human. Also she didn’t feel manic enough during the first act, especially breaking down.
It was a very cool idea to pull people in from the audience during March of the falsettos but it undermines the point of the song. Same with them being in baseball uniforms, cool idea but defeats the purpose of song.
I think Marvin was had to much going on at times but Taylor Long has a history in opera so it makes sense he was a bit much at times
Lack of a chess prop throughout the musical was disappointing. Especially during chess game (obvi) and Jason bits of being a shut in who *plays chess* in his room all day (in act one)
Marvin’s mic was too quiet in about time
I stopped watching at year of the child so I can’t say crap about the rest of it. This was my two bits, over all everyone did a great job though!! This is mostly being nitpicky. I am one of the 52 likes so go show this production the love it deserves!!
Here’s the show!! Go watch and make your own opinions please!!
youtube
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Hey, Melissa! Read through thoughts bc I'm super behind on the stream but there's no way I was gonna just catch up and start watching were the stream is now, absolutely had to watch this first
"hey nick! Hey nick? Before we get started can I ask a character question?"
Ted pt 2
Omg Jeff-
Fanart my beloved everyone's incredible <3
Charlotte :( hnggg
Also yes Melissa likes cats!
Paul!!
Oh yeah Melissa likes Paul doesn't she
Bill!
Yeah Bill! Call Paul out!
Yeah Paul! Call Bill out!
You see your daughter in her hey?
TED!
Okay Jesus Ted
It's... Kinda.. Sweet? In a way? That Ted doesn't want step on Paul's game and chances with Melissa. I mean considering heoves fucking other Men's wives, and as someone who's obsessed with the fact Ted sees Paul as his best friend, there's something nice about Ted saying this... Even if it's followed by him being a horny bastard and saying he can't keep it up for long
"you're a fucking idiot Paul!"
He doesn't like her bc she's a cat person? I agree with Ted, "come on Matthews!"
Paul's childhood pets were named Spot and Whiskers my god he's so fucking Normal™
"well your lost fuckhead!" "yeah, ya fuckhead"
Ted doesn't see women as something you can, it's a win!!
Oh no Freddy is going to fucking run Ted over isn't he? If he dies this soon istg-
Omg no his office is empty omg noooo
But they didn't actually say he's dead... Maybe... Maybe there's a chance-
Melissa how do you not know Paul despises musicals?
Working Boys?!
"do you like film?" "not particularly" this single handly destroyed everyone's hc that's Paul's has a special interest in movies wtf Langs I'm gonna pretend that he does like film and only said this to get out of going out with Melissa
Beanies delivers?
Emma!!
Paulkins :))
Oh poor Melissa :(
Yeah Melissa stand up for yourself!! I love you!
Oh boy I wonder what he wants to tell his wife...
He'll never be able tell his wife huh?
"don't work to hard" "I don't :)"
Oh no...
I wonder if it's Freddy or is it Melissa?
Yeah!! Melissa! Badass!
Oh god Mr Davidson why would you keep that in your office...
Paul is a good man :) I love him :)
Wow Paul really loved that dog
LANGS STOP KILLING THE DOGS :( FFS
I mean it was when he was 10 so Spot would dead by now anyway ig but COME ON
Okay wow jeez Melissa he didn't mean for the dog to die, he didn't kill the dog it was accident
Teddy Bear? I.. Don't like that...
Holy fuck wtf Melissa omg
But at least Ted's alive!!
She cut off his fingers? Melissa is the human pet guy-
Can I just say Jon's scream in response to the taser was great
The way Melissa is saying absolutely terrifying things while also saying "soft little puppy beans!"
Something about Jon "Catteson" playing Paul pretending to be a cat
Also Melissa has lost her mind like she fully thinks Paul is a cat just bc he meowed
Ignoring the irony she is right about declawing being inhumane
Melissa should know that cats don't listen well
She's leaving RUN PAUL RUN TED
"WHAT THE FUCK TED!? WHAT THE SERIOUS FUCK!?" this line has me dead and Jon's delivery is grest I will be quoting this forever
Honestly yeah piss on her couch, she deserves it
The way Ted's totally accepted that he's stuck here
Joey omfg
Why would she record it??
Emma! Omg yes Emma that's right! Emma please! Go to Melissa's house! Save them!
Okay so Melissa... Is both aware that Paul is her "cat" but also full believes he's a cat?
Yes Bill!
No Bill-!
Melissa I have a feeling your friends are gonna be freaked out by your human pets
"w e n e e d h e l p"
Yeah ofc they don't care
There's a community of ppl in hatchetfield that all have human pets
Ted you fucking horny bastard-
TED THIS IS YOUR CHANCE YOU CAN FUCK OTHER WOMEN LATER WHEN YOU ESCAPE THE TREAT PROBABLY ISN'T GONNA BE SEX ANYWAY YOU DUMBASS
"if you go near that door I will bark at you! I swear to god I will bark at you Paul!" this is another line I'll be quoting a lot
Please the Scooby Doo impression
Ya know... I don't actually think this is considered a treat for dogs...
Goddammit Ted's alive again
"you don't want to get another dog killed do you?" is so. So bad. Like Paul already feels terrible for accidentally getting a dog killed when he was young and now I can't imagine how he feels partially being the reason Ted's dead... And then Melissa saying this, like obviously everything she's done up to this point is worse but like goddamn the psychological hurt
BILL!!!
Bill.... Daddy.. No..
PLZ NO GIRLS DONT NOT BILL NOT BILL PLEASE
PAUL!!!
Bill you dumbass-
NO OFC A CAR WOULD HIT PAUL
A gun?
FREDDY?? I CAN'T BELIEVE HE'S THE FUCKING HERO!? Also good job Melissa you forgot to kill him
HE'S APART OF THE FBI???
The Kitty Cat Club?
Okay come on you didn't have to saw paw
13?
Paul let it go she deserves to feel bad for this if nothing else
SHE'S GONE? HOW?
Paul- Paul- PAUL WHAT DID YOU DO
PAUL YES SHE IS A MONSTER SHE KILLED 13 PEOPLE YOU LITERALLY SAW HER KILL TED SHE WAS GOING TO KILL YOU TOO
PAUL WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
"love comes in all forms"
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VelvetCardiganBucky’s Recommendations 2021: Week 16 | April 11th – April 17th
Welcome to week 16 of my recommendations, if you would like to be featured on a future list, I follow the hashtag #VelvetCardiganBucky, message me, tag me in your future works, or reblog this post and link to your story, one-shot, Masterlist, writing challenge, etc.
Be aware some if not most stories and writers on this list are meant to be consumed by an audience of those 18+. My blog is also an 18+ blog.
✨Page breaks are made @firefly-graphics✨
«Last Week
Week 17»
My Masterlist
My Fic Rec List of Mafia/Mob Bucky/Sebastian & Steve/Chris/Andy
Stuff I Posted This Week:
Lee Bodecker
One-Shots:
Rough Love by @ladyfallonavenger » Lee Bodecker x Reader — Lee wakes to his wife getting ready for the day. This work is inspired by the song Poker Face by Lady Gaga. | So very hot. 🥵
I Can’t Wait To Meet You by @not-a-great-writer » Lee Bodecker x Pregnant!Reader — Request: Lee doesn’t want to leave his pregnant wife’s side. | I summarized the requested one-shot up. It’s very fluffy and domestic and sweet. I say we petition for the user name to be changed not a great writer to a fantastic writer!
(Mini) Series:
*Give In 🎡 Pt.21 🎡 Pt.22 by @not-a-great-writer » Soft!Dark!Lee Bodecker x Shy!Reader — She didn’t think she was anything special. So when the intimidating Sheriff takes an interest in her, she can’t help but feel a little unsettled. Her boring life is about to get a little interesting. | Can I just say this story is just *chefs kiss*? Lee Bodecker? *chefs kiss* Reader? *chefs kiss* It’s just all so perfect and so is the smut.
Bucky Barnes
One-Shots:
I’m In The Water by @nsfwsebbie » Dark!Winter Soldier x Reader — He’s in the wind, and you’re in the water. Nobody’s son, nobody’s daughter. | Read the tags, this is extremely dirty as well as dark, but I honestly enjoyed it. Sabrina really blew my mind with this one.
Show A Little Gratitude by @thicccsimp » Bucky Barnes x Reader — You discover a new kink with Bucky after making a bad call during a mission. | Hot, Hot, Hot 🥵
Just Wondering by @infernal-fire » soft!dark!Buck Barnes x Reader — Reader is pregnant and has some mixed feelings. | This is sort of adorable, and pregnancy hormones really come out in this.
Sunday Kinda’ Love by @msmarvelwrites » Bucky Barnes x Reader — You weren’t sure when it happened, falling in love with Bucky Barnes. | Brontë is such an amazing writer who wrote something that made my heart squeal while the rest of me just thought it was really hot.
Don’t You by @pagesoflauren » Bucky Barnes x Reader — Bucky sees you for the first time after breaking up with you. | Taylor Swift and Bucky Barnes what more could you ask for in life?
(Mini) Series:
Just Like Dad 💋 Pt.2 by @ladyfallonavenger » Bucky Barnes x Reader — The Reader loses Bucky in the snap and life presents a whole new challenge. | It’s got your angst and your fluff, everything you need for a perfect one-shot.
Sweet Dreams Pt.3 ✨ Pt.1 ✨ Pt.2 by @jedimastermelkor » Bucky Barnes x Reader; Mystery Avenger x Reader — Your daily routine involves waking up in the morning, going to work and sulking at night. But then you meet the man you’ve fantasized about for your entire life, Bucky Barnes. At the same time, you’ve caught someone else’s eye and his first step in winning you over is to cook you breakfast. But will you be welcoming of that person’s affections? | You can tell Bucky really likes the reader in this and the reader has a crush on Bucky. Now you add Peter who you know has a crush on the reader. It's sort of adorable. I highly recommend it. It will keep you at the edge of your seat and your jaw hitting the floor a couple of times along the way.
Stucky
(Mini) Series:
The Miracle Pt.3 ✨ Pt.1 ✨Pt.2 by @heavenhatesme » Soft!Dark!Stucky x Reader — When infertility threatens mankind with extinction and there hasn’t been a baby for almost 18 years, what happens when two certain super soldiers fall for the same woman and accidentally impregnate her? | Heed the tags folks. I want to call them soft!dark, but they are pretty dark, but it’s up to you the reader to decide. The smut in this is great, and the storyline just as good, it also pulls on your heartstrings.
Vampires Will Never Hurt You by @missgraceomalley » Steve Rogers x Darcy Lewis; Bucky Barnes x Darcy Lewis; Steve Rogers x Darcy Lewis x Bucky Barnes — Darcy's been hiding something and Steve can't pin what it is. Can the serum help him? Or will he be compelled away? (AO3)| I love stories that take you on twist and turns, I also love vampires, add in Damon Salvatore plus the two Super Soldiers? You make me very happy!
*Brooklyn Wars by @world-of-aus » Mob!Steve x Reader, Mob!Bucky x Reader / Eventual Mob!Stucky x Reader — Childhood friends pulled apart by a move and a rivalry between families, will a shared promise of ‘till the end of the line’ be enough to keep them together. Or will a deal struck up gone wrong, and an indecisiveness to choose who your heart loves be the ‘end of the line.’ | I spent my Saturday morning re-reading this and loving every part and wishing for more. @world-of-aus is such a fantastic writer that doesn’t get enough recognition in my list.
Steve Rogers
(Mini) Series:
*His Koala Bear by @kinanabinks » Dark!Steve Rogers x Innocent!Reader — You and steve have been best friends since you were 5. for the longest time, he has wanted so much more from you. and it’s getting harder for him to stop himself from taking it. | Prepare for the emotional roller coaster this story is going to take you on and to change your underwear or perhaps to take a cold shower, maybe both.
*Lipstick and Crayons 🖍 Pt.5 by @oneoftheprettynerds » Dark!Mob!Steve Rogers x Single Mom!Reader — Steve can’t ever repay you for what you did. After meeting you, Steve believes his broken family is the missing piece in the puzzle of your own wrecked one. Indebting the crime lord to you has been the biggest mistake of your life, cause now you can’t get rid of him, no matter what. Loyalty and favours go a long way in the mob. | This story makes you feel like you are watching a Dark!Mob Romantic movie staring Steve Rogers. It’s just that good and I love it.
Ransom Drysdale
One-Shots:
Sugar by @chrissquares » Ransom Drysdale x Reader — Reader sees Ransom in his glasses for the first time. | Let’s be honest, I wouldn’t mind seeing Ransom in his glasses more often, especially if he looked like that.
(Mini) Series:
Stolen What’s Mine Pt.1 by @wanderinglunarnights » Ransom Drysdale x OFC!Charlotte Callahan — Charlotte and Ransom are up for the same promotion at the publishing house. She hates his handsome ass, especially when he steals the job as editor in chief out from under her nose. | Charlotte is sassy and she isn’t going to take any of Ransom’s nonsense, I love it! You can tell it’s going to be a good one!
Andy Barber
One-Shots:
I’ll Be Here by @candlefics » Andy Barber x Reader — Jacob grew up with you around. What happens when he’s convicted of murder, and his family falls apart? What will your relationship with Andy turn into? | I like this take on a show I have still yet to watch. It was sweet and emotional, a must read in my book.
(Mini) Series:
*Moment’s Silence Pt.3 🥞 Pt.1 🥞 Pt.2 by @syntheticavenger » Frank Adler x Reader; Andy Barber x Reader — The tumultuous relationship between twin brothers Frank and Andy takes a turn for the worse when Andy offers to wipe out Frank’s debt by asking for the one thing Andy wants that Frank has. | This story has me wanting to bite my nails in anticipation even though I can’t. So freaking good!
Misc.
Drabbles:
Good Behavior by @syntheticavenger » Dark!Andy Barber x Reader; Soft Dark!Steve Rogers x Reader — Andy’s special delivery arrives with a familiar face. | This is hot in a way you wouldn’t expect it to be, and I’m sort of wishing for a part 2.
One-Shots:
*Distractions by @rebelwrites » Jax Teller x Reader — I requested “Can you please put a shirt on?” | Let me just say this prompt was just so well written and it put a smile on my face. I would welcome Jax as a distraction any day, as long as he threw one of his signature panty dropping smiles my way.
Seal Team
One-Shot:
I’m Not Good Enough by @rebelwrites » Sonny Quinn x Reader — “So, we’re just going to ignore the fact that you drunk-dialed me to tell me you love me?” | This broke my heart than it fixed it. 💗
No Damsel In Distress by @rebelwrites » Clay Spenser x Reader — #3 and #13 for Clay Spenser. “Even when we were kids, i always kicked your ass!” And “How is my wife more badass than me?” | So hilarious and badass.
You Aren’t Allowed To Be Sick by @rebelwrites » Clay Spenser x Reader — “What do you mean you’re sick?! You’re my partner in crime!” | Clay can buy me flowers and take care of me any day.
#fanfiction recommendations#ktk rec#VelvetCardiganBucky#bucky barnes#bucky barnes x rogers#steve rogers#steve rogers x reader#reader insert#seal team#andy barber#mob!rec#sonny quinn x reader#lee bodecker#clay spenser x reader#jax teller#lee bodecker x reader#sons of anarchy#jax teller x reader#ransom drysdale#ransom drysdale x ofc#frank adler#andy barber x reader#frank adler x reader
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I have too many thoughts:
Of course Ray is on TikTok (Swellview alternative name).
The whole 10 seconds without internet bit. Living.
Ray is never allowed to wear tank tops (wifebeaters, cough* cough*) in an episode again. He simply wore too many in a single episode and has maxed out his limit.
The villain prison is so much more sophisticated in the Man’s Nest. Except for the facts that the villains are awake/mobile and crammed in one pen as opposed to having separate pens (why don’t they conspire and escape? Oh wait, they probably are in the 4 part special).
Monkey. Also, Cooper (the actor, not the character) picking up the monkey in the end scene. So adorable!
The use of ‘sus’ had me howling. Yes, it’s a video game reference (because Mika was playing a video game). BUTTTTT, Ray was also using TikTok and sus carries a queer connotation on the platform (and no I don’t ship Ray/Henry), but come on(!) invoking a man’s name like that? The kids just confirmed they know Ray is Bisexual. Don’t @ me, I will not be accepting criticism on this front.
HOW HAVE I GONE THIS LONG TYPING WITHOUT HYPING UP CHOPA’S HAIR? That tears it, I’m dying mine after graduation.
I’m a sucker for nicknames and I just love that Bose is the only one with a nickname (I feel like everyone should use it, but I’m ok with just his mentor using it for now). I think it really drives home his childlike innocence that the rest of the team doesn’t have.
Which, side note, the fact I view Bose as so childlike and ‘simple’ (not dumb because he is extremely smart; the language example I always go to), had me thrown for a loop that he’s going on 1000 dates for charity. And into it? Mainly to make Ray jealous, but still. Trying to grow the kids up because the actors are already so much older?
Wait to go Dana (not Mika) for owning that power suit and totally taking on the new character/persona for the dual role this episode.
Calling out Ray (Cooper) for being 40, I cackled. 😻😻😻
Have I mentioned I missed Schwoz and just enjoy having him on my screen?
The jars! Cute, but isn’t Ray really the only one who dabs?
The towels for the exorcist matched the teams’ colors, except Ray’s was white (for the wifebeater) and Schwoz’s was purple (a fem color since he’s usually paired with pink; but also it has religious connotations/those shoal things; praise the costume department).
Wait a minute, RT isn’t a ghost and that’s not how possession works.
The Exorcist is so outdated by today’s standards, but as a horror buff I appreciate the reference.
I love Michael (and Schwoz) so much!!!! He was so happy with that line delivery, I could see it on his face!!!
Also, also: Ray had the same joke/horror reference in Charlotte Gets Ghosted (HD).
I love the cardio joke. Because I always point out when there’s a running scene, Ray is doubled over and panting (albeit, he usually plays it off as due to his yelling at the same time, but not always) by the end of it like he doesn’t do cardio and he’s just all strength/muscle. Great call/meta joke.
Mika playing the video game inadvertently reminded me of the Flabber Gassed episode & Ray’s ripped muscle in the legs reminded me of the Massage Chair episode (HD).
Mika has so much control over her power now as seen through the precision of blowing the tiny item out of Chopa’s hand. Whereas RT had no control over the power despite possessing her body. She is probably the strongest DF member (despite Chopa claiming to be able to control the range of her power; something yet to be seen, but I’d like to).
I’m so excited for the next 3 episodes (in particular), but I’m super excited about the new season coming out!!!
#henry danger#danger force#new episode#cooper barnes#Michael d Cohan#ray manchester#df spoilers#references#meta jokes#call back#danger force spoilers#new season#don’t erase Ray’s bisexuality
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My wife made the EXACT Johnny Walker joke about his walking towards Lizzie and the Gardiners at Pemberly lmao
And yeah I think the 1980 actually does the best job I've seen of capturing the book comprehensively, not only in terms of "are all the lines there" but also a lot of the details. It definitely has my favorite take on most of the secondary characters. I didn't talk about Mr. Collins but this one felt the most Mr. Collinsish to me, officious and overbearing but fundamentally just in love with his own voice. His relationship with Charlotte also hit a lot closer to the mark in my opinion - I felt her less as "desperate enough to put up with anything" and more in line with her book incarnation of "recognizes a fixer upper and is willing to commit to making her marriage something she can live with."
Speaking of other people's marriages, I think the 1980 grasped perfectly the role of the Gardiners', the Collinses', and the Bennets' marriages in contrasting against one another to triangulate an idea of a good marriage. Especially the way it was willing to actually confront the dysfunction of the Bennets, and point out that Mr. Bennet belittles and disrespects his wife constantly for things that he could've helped her improve, and Mrs. Bennet needles and nags without listening to anyone including her husband, and it's clear how years and years of that have entrenched it beyond repair. Compared against the Gardiners, who enjoy each other's company and engage in conversation and an exchange of ideas, or even the Collinses, where it's clear Charlotte doesn't think precisely the world of her husband but is willing to bear the irritations because she knows that she chose this and chose it for a reason. I honestly think the habit many adaptations have of whitewashing of the ugliness of the Bennet marriage (and Lizzie's acute awareness of her parents' failures therein) detracts a lot from the nuance of the Lizzie-Charlotte-Collins situation, but the 1980 nails it. Charlotte, who's smart and resourceful and socially aware and above all practical, looks at Collins and sees a situation she can handle or at least live with, whereas Lizzie, because of her family, sees a miserable repeat of her parents' own miserable marriage. Foregrounding familial disharmony highlights why it's so important to Lizzie that she respect her husband, in a very human and vulnerable way.
I'm pretty forgiving of awkward letter scenes specifically, because it's truly a lose-lose-lose situation in terms of putting them onscreen but you can't cut the letters either! Personally 1980 actually gets a lot of points from me because I loved that they had Caroline reading her letter aloud to Louisa to see how it sounded, and I thought that was innovative.
I really wish David Rintoul had worked for me in this series. It's frustrating because I think he's pretty much a picture perfect Darcy in terms of looks, bearing, and affectation, but while I could definitely see places here and there where he was doing a micro expression or emoting a little (the Lydia and Wickham revelation comes to mind, he did a great job with the thousand yard stare there) for the most part he just read too flat to me, and his delivery was too fast. I can tell that he's a good actor, I can practically smell the Royal Shakespeare Company on him, but I don't know whether it was bad direction or just a bad acting choice, it doesn't quite make it for me, especially when he's in scenes alone with Elizabeth and not only is she so lively and expressive by comparison, but I as an Austen person expect him to relax and brighten and change demeanor around her, compared to, say, the Netherfield party (where Rintoul does shine as the straight man among the Bingleys cheerfulness). I think the fact that he's almost really good makes him a little worse to me. But maybe I'll acquire the taste on rewatch!
Anyway I can't remember if I already said it but the 1980 has hands down the best screenwriting of any pride and prejudice I've seen, even if the direction and acting can sometimes be hit or miss. Either way, to me the 1980 will always be famous for the Aquatic Life Hat.
Found out the 1980 bbc pride and prejudice is on one of the free channels on my tv so since I'm still sick I'll be watching that for the next few days. Exciting!
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Return to Hatchetfield-Town - TGWDLM Part 2
Oh my god, we’re back again. Brothers, sisters, everybody sing – wait no
It’s TGWDLM part 2! Today we talk about coffee, those police siren sounds and we begin looking into Hidgens… god help us. It also features a new theory I haven’t actually posted on the blog yet.
Also, please let me know if you’re enjoying these. They do take a lot of time, but they are a lot of fun to put together.
Part 1 | Part 3
Reality is falling apart as I stand here today… I guess it’s time for a coffee break
This is how I have entered every Starbucks I have ever been to.
Hey Starkid, when can we get a full version of the Black Coffee song?
Has it been established yet whether Nora and Zoey had already been infected when they were teaching Emma the new tip song. If yes, why did they just teach Emma the tip song and not infect her? Just to embarrass her mid-song when she didn’t know the rest of the dance? Or…
Thomas Sanders Voice – Theory Time
So at the end of Part 1, I established that the Hive had picked Paul to be their Hero, their star, way, way, early on at the start of their apotheosis. Once we move into Let It Out/ Inevitable I’ll talk about this more, but basically – there is a reason they want Paul to survive the start of the show. There is a reason the infected (and later McNamara) keep pressing him on what he wants. They need him to want something, so that they can get what they want, because that’s how the Worrisome Wombles (LiB) work. They want him to want to destroy them, so he can be with Emma – that’s his drive. They’re very aware that without a want, they may not be able to manipulate him to do what they need.
Therefore it’s very possible that if Nora and Zoey had been infected early on, yet hadn’t infected Emma, it was because they were sure Emma would be the “thing” that Paul wants – they want their star of the show and they think they know who they can use to get it. /End of theory
Promise me you’ll think about the implications.
@abiimaryy can I just post your one post that perfectly encapsulates that Starkid definitely did not think about the implications of that line when they wrote it? We’ve all long gone past the point of no return.
“Cup of Roasted Coffee” is track 4 on Now That’s What I Call Coffee. “Poisoned Coffee” is the album hidden track that you must play 20 minutes of silence to find. Is this an old person reference now?
I also fully believe the coffee shop patrons were already beginning to be infected when the song began. Sure they were poisoned and their coffee contained the blue goo but the “in-time coffee cup dancing” and exaggerated synchronous sips is just too on the nose. Their infections begun, they just needed that dose of poisoned coffee to kill them off to fully take them over.
At this point the Hive are still not particularly violent – ignoring the fact they kill three men with poisoned coffee in broad daylight.
The cat is clearly not a secret Eldritch being
There’s nothing I love more than a fourth wall break, and Starkid have regularly establish fourth walls do not exist in their universes. I can’t decide which is more telling of some kind of Hatchetfield link with the audience, Jon and Lauren wandering through the alley, or Joey giving the audience member an apple. There is a wonderful theory that the audience is part of the B&W which @wolvesandvoices put into words here: x
“I didn’t think about the implications!” – me thinking back to that time 12 years ago when I discovered something called Harry Potter the musical by someone called Starkid. They were a funny group of people – wonder what they’re all doing now.
Paul’s work friends one by one popping out of the trash cans is hilarious, but its notable again that Mr Davidson was infecting people in his office – Bill notes that people kept coming out singing. On my first watch I didn’t really take note of this, and just assumed Paul got out of the office before Mr Davidson could infect him, but taking into account the theories mentioned above and previously, this line just reaffirms that the Hive do not yet want Paul infected.
Who is the latte hottay? Answers on a postcard.
These aren’t spirit fingers... THESE are spirit fingers
Ted really doesn’t fully grasp the severity of what is happening around him. The police are singing at you Ted, I don’t think they’re too fussed about your ID.
I don’t really have much to say about Show Me Your Hands – it doesn’t really add much to theory fodder until the end. That’s not to say I don’t love it, its one of my top songs in the show (tho I think all of the songs are in my top songs… I’m very indecisive). Shout out to Mariah’s dry delivery of “the cat is dead” and Robert’s siren noises. My sincere hope is that in a future Hatchetfield production there is a need for a siren sound effect, and it is just a recording of Robert.
Charlotte touched the brain. The blue brain. The brain covered in goo. Pokey’s blue goo. I’m sure that’s fine and has no ramifications later in the show.
It is at this moment on my first watch that I realised how much Charlotte’s voice in this show sounds like Judy Garland.
Oh Hidgens. He’s finally arrived. Does he need an introduction? From what I have seen from a lot of posts as people discover TGWDLM, a lot of people know about Hidgens before they even know what the show is about. Which you know what, fair. I’m sure Hidgens would be thrilled to discover his legacy. I feel like it’s obvious, but I am assuming Robert intended Hidgens to sound like Doc from Back to the Future? Hmmm, a kooky “academic” who has an accident and ends up with a vision of something that could change the world. Great Scott!
Hidgens, my dear, please don’t gesture to yourself while holding a gun.
Ok, so Hidgens theorised this exact scenario thirty years ago. I believe it has been established this happened when he was struck by lightning. Now, lightning is used a LOT in Hatchetfield shows, and I did mention briefly here, that it could possibly be a play on the trope that in books and movies, the “creature comes alive” from a bolt of lightning. Certainly the meteor is accompanied by a storm, which does make me believe that Hidgens was granted the vision by someone from the Black and White. Theories:
Pokey sent him the vision because he knew that it would entice Hidgens eventually due to his love of musical theatre.
Webby sent him the vision in the misplaced hope that he would work on finding a solution
I also found a tweet by Nick which states that initially Hidgens was supposed to talk about the 1518 Dancing Plague which honestly – what does this mean. Was this plague originally intended to be an early attempt by Pokey to infect the world?
Hidgens touched the brain. The blue brain. The brain covered in goo. Pokey’s blue goo. I’m sure that’s fine and has no ramifications later in the show.
I posted a while back about the concept that Hidgens actually got infected early in the show, which has further implications for the likes of Charlotte also, but for now I’ll just post this really succinct theory by @westcoastbroadway: x
Hatchetfield High Homework:
What other songs would feature on Now That’s What I Call Coffee?
Consider an AU where Prof Hidgens and Doc Brown are swapped. How different would TGWDLM and Back to the Future be?
Once again, follow the wonderful people mentioned in the post.
See you in part 3 for Charlotte Theories and sad Bill time.
#the guy who didn't like musicals#tgwdlm#hatchetfield#hatchetfield theory#hatchetfield theories#starkid would totally do this#team starkid#return to hatchetfield town
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"this story needs a ending" does it though, mendel? aka here are my underrated trina moments in act ii
all of whizzer and trina's looks to each other in falsettoland ALSO they're both dressed in pink shirts and looking similar again how have i never noticed that before
trina doing the robot and whizzer hitting nancy and startling her they're both precious okay
every piece of trina's choreo in year of the child is perfect and perfectly delivered by stephanie j "that's me" block
"you have eight more innings, my love" so get your shit together
i love the little chastising turn and glare she and mendel do when marvin insults jason's playing
the entire baseball scene is just everyone being judgmental and then turning around and chastising and judging everyone else for the same behavior
incredible amazing award-winning
RUN
this isn't trina but i love betsy wolfe as caroline so much
*finger point* "you always do this"
the beginning of act ii more like time to drag mendel in subtle and not so subtle ways to remind us all of these characters are human and flawed
jazzercize + belting that's all
shoutout to trina finally getting her back massage
whatdoyoumeanyoudon'twantabarmitzvah this line gives me hives the passive aggressive parent energy is Too Strong
"how do you think we feel about that" with the little taps on jason's chest and the switch into some sort of mix or chest voice zone
the way she bops on jason on the nose and face with "go ahead and kill your mother"
when whizzer collapses and goes to see dr. charlotte "everything will be alright" is sung over that from offstage including what must be stephanie lingering with clearest most gorgeous delivery of that phrase
holding to the ground in its entirety but what absolutely sends me is the way this is sung over the set change from block world to the very real hospital
IN PARTICULAR the moment she stands up from sitting on the block into the full belt on that is LIIIIFE
and that block is immediately taken off by brandon almost out from under her (as if the ground keeps shifting)
and then we continue to get her absolutely raw vocals as the skyline is flown up and the entire scene is dominated by that backlit sterile curtain and whizzer is helped in
and then we don't even get to finish the final phrase back down in that lower register where stephanie is so rich and steady it's just
everything will be--
lapine and block i have some CHOICE words
also this is usually the point i stop watching if i'm not prepared to be emotionally wrecked
first thing jason says is "gee you look awful" and always composed and polite trina goes oh my god i can't believe my child just said that
cancelling the bar mitzvah but specifically after jason leaves and it's just mendel being brutally honest
her reactions break my heart and then the holding to the ground reprise breaks my heart
and then nothing sad happens between this song and the actual bar mitzvah nothing at all
okay now that i'm crying
"flowers make things lovely" into that whole lovely section sounds so so so lovely which makes the change into "i feel more helpless than i've felt in years" that much more ouch
cordelia and charlotte and trina with the food and the kiss and the reaction and the setting up and that harmony just UGH LADIES
and i'll include this because i like talking about blocking and it's a group effort so it counts as trina content
but the way whizzer and the hospital just....disappear
whizzer goes behind the curtain and exits with it and the rest of the set is taken away with such ruthless efficiency that within a few bars marvin is left on the empty stage alone
and then finally this is neither here nor there but i'm glad they all get to end in that final group hug because it seems like it could provide a well needed hit of serotonin after the weight of the show
#yes the joke is that musicals are lighter than air in act i#and then plunge you to the emotional depths of hell in act ii#but i rarely watch/listen to act ii of falsettos#because it just takes so much emotional bandwith#falsettos#stephanie j block
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Eccentricity [Chapter 14: Love Keeps The Monsters From Our Door] [Series Finale]
A/N: Thank you for your encouragement, enthusiasm, laughter, rants, screeches of anguish, and unapologetic thirsting for “sexy undead Italian man” Joseph Francis Mazzello. I hope you love this conclusion more than Baby Swan loves pineapple pizza. 💜
Series Summary: Potentially a better love story than Twilight?
Chapter Title Is A Lyric From: “Til I Die” by Parsonsfield. (The #1 song I associate with this fic!)
Chapter Warnings: Language.
Word Count: 7.7k.
Other Chapters (And All My Writing) Available: HERE
Taglist: @queen-turtle-boiii @bramblesforbreakfast @maggieroseevans @culturefiendtrashqueen @imnotvibingveryguccimrstark @escabell @im-an-adult-ish @queenlover05 @someforeigntragedy @imtheinvisiblequeen @seven-seas-of-ham-on-rhyee @deacyblues @tensecondvacation @brianssixpence @some-major-ishues @haileymorelikestupid @youngpastafanmug @simonedk @rhapsodyrecs
Mercy
We have to stay in the Vladivostok palace until her transformation is complete, and I hate it.
The floors are cold and sterile and every clang of noise ricochets off them like a bullet. The earth outside is stripped bare and hibernal. There is no green to interrupt the bleakness of the sky, the cruel absence of color: no spruces or hemlocks or bigleaf maples, no evergreen forests, no verdant fields, only a grey that bleeds from the sky in sheets of hail and driving rain. This land is a stranger. So many of the faces, too, are strangers, although they try. Honora sits with me—her large dark eyes, like mirrors of mine, polished and wet with aching pity—and braids my hair. Morana invites me to bake homemade bread with her. Austin tries to make me smile. Cato visits me as much as he can, because he feels responsible; or maybe he would do it anyway, maybe lessening suffering is as instinctual to him as bloodshed is to so many of our kind. And when Cato is with me, I do feel a little better, like my story might belong to somebody else, like it’s a name I can’t quite remember, like it’s a transitory moment of déjà vu I can catch glimpses of but never touch. And yet, still, I send him away.
I don’t want to be with Cato. It’s painful for him to be around me, I can see that. It’s painful for Rami, and for Ben, and for Joe, and for Lucy and Scarlett. It’s even painful for the Irish Wolfhounds that Cato found locked up for safekeeping in Larkin’s study; they skulk around the palace vigilantly but leave great swaths of uninterrupted space around me like open water. So I conjure up a mask of brave, hopeful acceptance and wear it everywhere I go.
Joe says very little, never leaves the girl he calls Baby Swan’s side, dabs her scorching skin with washcloths soaked in ice water and murmurs in sympathy when she screams through the unconsciousness, from beneath the ocean of fire we all know so well. He nods off sometimes, snatching minutes of sleep like fireflies in a jar, before jolting awake to make sure her heart is still beating. When Ben isn’t checking on them, he’s with Cato, helping to draw up plans for the future, reminiscing about the past with slick eyes and clinking midnight glasses of whiskey. Scarlett sprawls across the desk in what was once Larkin’s study and spends hours on the phone with Archer as she gazes up at the ceiling, telling him how to care for the farm animals and the garden, reassuring him that we’ll be home soon, whispering things to him that I try not to hear; and I know she wouldn’t want me to anyway. Lucy weeps delicate, ceaseless tears as she perches on the staircase landing and Rami entombs her in his arms, never having to ask what she needs from him. And I wander meaninglessly through the echoing, unfamiliar hallways like a moon without a planet.
I know what they all think about me, perhaps even Rami, for I keep it buried as deep as all skeletons should be: that I’m irrevocably kind, effortlessly forgiving. That I’m as incapable of bitterness as I am of aging. But they’re wrong. It’s a choice, and it always has been, ever since a late-November dusk in 1864 when madness eclipsed mercy. Every day I choose whether to surrender to the beckoning, malignant hatred that lurks in the back of my bedroom closet, in the dusty and ill-lit loft of the barn roped with cobwebs, in the twilight tree line of the western hemlocks crawling with shadows that whisper through fanged teeth. Every day I decide whether to become a monster. And it has never been harder to remember why I don’t.
My future is unimaginable. The nights are endless. I feel black, razored seeds of what I am horrified must be bitterness burrowing beneath my skin and taking root there. I am consumed by infected, fruitless questions that I can’t silence: Why Gwilym? Why Arthur? Why Eliza and Charlotte? Why is it always fire?
The first words that Gwilym ever spoke to me, as I unraveled from unconsciousness under a grove of sycamore trees with smoke still clinging to my unscarred skin, rattle around in my skull like windchimes beneath thunderous skies. His voice was colored with an accent I couldn’t place, and yet it sounded like home: You’re in a dark place right now. But you don’t have to stay there.
That might have been true once. That might have been true in the ruinous autumn of 1864. But now I can’t find my way out.
Seventy-three hours after our arrival in this barren corner of the world, Charlie Swan’s daughter wakes up as a vampire. Her heart is perfectly still, her skin faultless, her senses sharp, her mind as impenetrable as ever; at least, that’s what Lucy says when she finds me. And Lucy tugs at my hand, wearing her first smile in days, insisting that I have to come meet the newest member of our coven, to welcome her. I don’t know how to tell Lucy that I’m afraid I don’t have it in me to love this girl, that I don’t have it in me to love anyone but ghosts. And yet—compliantly, yieldingly, expecting nothing but disappointment in the monster I have become—I follow her.
The door is already open to the Swan girl’s room; chattering, beaming vampires flood in and out like the tides. I step inside. And I see the way that Joe looks at her, the way that Ben does; and all those seeds that I had feared might be bitterness blossom into nothing but open air.
It’s Not A Fucking Wedding (A.K.A. 13.5 Months Later)
The ocean is a universe. Its arms are not ever-expanding, spiraling galaxies of suns and planets and nebulae and black holes, this is true; its belly is not a vacuum of inhospitable oblivion, its bones are not invisible strings of gravity, its language is not a silence older than starlight, older than eternity. But the ocean is a universe nonetheless, its borders tucked neatly around the seven continents, slumbering there until the next hurricane or tsunami or ice age comes conquering; and inevitably equilibrium is restored—like defibrillator paddles to a heart, like naloxone to an addict’s blood—and our two worlds can coexist side by side once again.
The ocean’s arms are sighing waves, bubbling and brisk, grasping and retreating in the same breath. Its belly is swollen with life from immense blue whales down to swarming clouds of single-celled, sun-hungry phytoplankton. Its language is ancient whispers; not parched and blistering and brittle sounds like the desert’s but cool, serene, supple, engulfing. And I can hear them all, if I listen closely enough. I can hear the sentient whistling of orcas, the breaking of waves against rocks, the scrabbling of sand crabs beneath the earth, the gruff distant barks of sea lions, the rustling of evergreen pine needles in the breeze. And I understand now why it was always so easy for vampires to be introspective, to lapse into thoughtful, unhurried silences. I could imagine spending decades just sitting here with my knees tucked to my chest and my hair whipping in the brackish wind, watching the seasons roll by like a wheel.
Joe was coming back from the gravel parking lot. I turned to watch him: red U Chicago hoodie, messy dark auburn-ish hair, a pizza box clasped in his hands. The GrubHub delivery driver was returning to his car with the toothiest of grins.
“Buon appetito!” Joe announced, dramatically presenting me with the pizza box. It had become our post-finals tradition each semester: pizza at La Push beach, half-pepperoni, half-pineapple.
“Grazie, sexy undead Italian man. Your accent is getting so good!”
“I know, right?! I’m on a twelve-day Duolingo streak. I can’t let that little green owl dude down.”
“I’m impressed, I’ll admit it. I gotta brush up on my Welsh. Why’s the GrubHub driver so cheery?”
“I tipped him $500.”
I smiled, opening the box and lifting out a semi-warm slice of pineapple pizza. Elastic strands of mozzarella cheese stretched like rubber bands until they snapped. “Aww, really?”
Joe plopped down onto the cool, damp sand beside me. “No. I lied. We’re actually having a torrid love affair.”
I laughed, shaking my head. “How could you possibly have time for all that?” Between school, business ventures, family activities, and me, Joe was very rarely unoccupied. And he preferred it that way.
“I’m so glad you asked. I’m very speedy, if you recall. And that’s just one of the exclusive services I offer. I am a man of many talents. I make people’s wildest dreams come true. Who am I to deny the GrubHub delivery man the wonderland that is my spindly, annoying body?”
“You are the fastest,” I said, winking.
“Oh shut up! I mean, uh, uhhh, silenzio!” He pointed his slice of pepperoni pizza at me reproachfully. “That’s not what I meant. I’m not the fastest at everything.”
“Whatever you say, mob guy.”
He lunged for me, pinned me down in the crumbling sand, both of us laughing wildly as the crusts of our pizza slices bounded off and were snatched up by diving, screeching seagulls. He growled with mock savagery, braced his hips against mine, kissed his way from the corner of my jaw to my lips. That oh-so-familiar commanding, craving ache for him came roaring to the surface; and now there was no bittersweet edge to it, no inescapable backdrop of lambent numbers ticking down from five or ten or fifteen years to zero. Now there was only the calm, unurgent promise of forever.
“Joe—!”
“You have besmirched my honor, Baby Swan. I am left with no recourse but to refresh your clearly flawed memory and prove you wrong.”
“Public indecency? That’s illegal, sir.”
“Okay, you gotta stop stealing my catchphrases. It’s extremely difficult for me to come up with new ones. I’m almost a hundred years old, you know.”
“Alright, I guess you’re not bad in bed for a basically-centenarian.”
He smiled down at me, his dark eyes alight, the wind tearing through his hair, one palm resting on my forehead, uncharacteristically quiet.
“What?” I asked, worried.
“Nothing,” he said. “I’m just really glad we’re a thing.”
“You better be. You’re kind of stuck with me now. You’ve stolen my virtue, you’ve made me fall in love with your entire demented family, you’ve forced your torturous immortality upon me. I’m not going anywhere. Unless you ever stop funding my pineapple pizza addiction, of course.”
Joe chuckled as he climbed off me and took my hand in his, pulling me upright. “It’s absolutely ridiculous, by the way. Your insistence on being a sort-of vegetarian. It’s embarrassing. You’re the wimpiest vampire ever. You’re a disgrace to the coven.”
“I eat animals!” I objected.
“Yeah, when you have to.” And Joe was right: I steered clear of flesh outside of the two or three times a week when I hunted. For environmental sustainability reasons, I mostly consumed deer or rabbits; although the very occasional shark was my guilty pleasure. Joe gnawed on his second slice of pizza and peered out into the overcast, dusky horizon, wiping crumbs from his stubbled chin with the back of his hand. “We only have one more of these left,” he said at last, a little sadly. “One more finals season at Calawah University. One more celebratory dinner at La Push.”
“We’ll just have to get used to a new view. Pizza by the Chicago River, maybe.”
Joe looked over at me, thoughtful again, smiling. He had received his acceptance letter to the University of Chicago three weeks ago. I got mine eight days later. “It won’t be hard for you to leave Forks?”
“It will be. Once upon a time I didn’t think that was possible, but I will miss Forks. And not just because of Charlie and Archer and Jessica and Angela and all the Lees. But it was hard to leave Phoenix, and I’m sure one day it will be hard to leave Chicago. Just because change is hard doesn’t mean it’s not the right thing to do.”
Joe nodded introspectively. “Every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end.”
“Don’t quote classic rock songs at me, mixtapes boy.”
“You love my mixtapes,” he teased, circling his left arm around my waist, pulling me in closer, touching his lips to my forehead. Mint and pine and starlight sank into my lungs like an anchor through the surf. “And that saying actually goes all the way back to Seneca, my dear.”
“Don’t tell me he’s still philosophizing in some cloudy corner of the world somewhere.”
“Not to my knowledge. Although that’s an intriguing thought. We need more famous vampires. Caligula would have made for very interesting conversation. Lincoln, Napoleon, Cleopatra, Shakespeare, Dante...I guess it’s possible that anyone is still around. Maybe we should turn Meat Loaf. You know, for the good of posterity.”
“Is it not enough that they’re already cursed with student debt and global warming?”
Joe cackled, took my face in his palms, kissed each of my cheeks one after the other, then nudged my nose with his. “You ready to go, Baby Swan? I suspect we’re expected to participate in some holiday festivities tonight.”
“I’m ready,” I agreed. We threw our leftover pizza to the seagulls, disposed of the grease-spotted cardboard box, and walked back to my 1999 Honda Accord with our pulseless hands intertwined.
The evergreen trees along Routh 110 fled by beneath a sky freckling with stars. Sharp winter air poured in through the open windows. And I could feel that it was cold, in the same way that I could feel the warmth on Forks’ rare sweltering days; but there was no discomfort that accompanied that knowledge. Pain only came when the sky was unincumbered by thick clouds churning in off the Pacific, and then it felt something like staring into the sun had as a human. Sunglasses helped, but the surest remedy was avoidance, was surrender. And what an inconsequential price to pay for forever.
“Wait,” I said, spying the mailbox that marked the start of the Lees’ driveway. “They still deliver mail on Christmas Eve, right?”
“Uh, I think so, why...?” And then he remembered. “Oh, yeah, let’s check!”
I pulled up beside the mailbox and Joe leaned out, returning to his seat with a mountain of Christmas cards and business correspondence and advertisements from Costco and Sephora. He sifted through them until he found a single white envelope from the University of Chicago Pritzker School of Medicine. It was addressed to a Mr. Benjamin August Hardy. Joe held it up to show me as we drove down the driveway, the Lee house coming into view and ornamented with a frankly excessive amount of multicolored string lights and inflatable reindeer.
“Oh my god!” I squealed, drumming the steering wheel.
“You want to be the one to give it to him?”
“Are you serious?! Yeah, can I?”
Joe passed the envelope to me as I parked my geriatric Honda, which Archer had pledged to keep alive as long as physically possible. In return, Ben let him and Scarlett borrow the Aston Martin Vantage no less than once a week. I dashed out of the car, up the steps of the front porch, and into the house that bubbled over with the sounds of metallic kitchen clashes and frenetic voices and Wham!’s Last Christmas.
“Ben?!” I shouted.
“Hi, honey!” Mercy called from the living room, where she and Lucy were putting the final touches on Scarlett’s gown. Scarlett was playing the part of semi-willing victim, wearing gold heels and an impatient smirk and her hair out of the way in a milkmaid braid; her train of vivid red lace billowed across the hardwood floor. From the couch, Archer and Rami were playing Mario Kart on the big-screen tv and nibbling their way through a tray of homemade gingerbread cookies.
“Oh wow,” I said, clutching the envelope to my chest, mesmerized. I kept waiting for Scarlett to start looking like a normal person to me, and it never happened. Tonight, in the glow of the flameless candles and kaleidoscopic Christmas lights and draped in lace the color of pomegranate seeds, she was Persephone: a goddess of resurrection, a face that death himself could not pass by unscathed. “You’ve outdone yourself, Lucy. Seriously.”
“One day I’m going to get you out of those thrift shop sweaters,” Lucy threatened me, placing a pin in the fabric at Scarlett’s waist.
“Yeah, okay. Let me know when that shows up in one of your visions.”
“Bitch,” Lucy flung back, snickering, knowing how improbable that was. I still appeared in her visions extremely infrequently, and then only when I happened to be standing next to whoever the premonition was actually about.
“Language, dear,” Mercy tutted, inspecting the hem of Scarlett’s gown.
Joe arrived beside me, his arms still full of mail. “ScarJo, I almost didn’t recognize you! Why do you have, like, no cleavage or fishnets or thigh slits?”
“Why do you have like no eyelashes?” Scarlett replied. “See, I can ask unnecessary and invasive questions too.”
Joe frowned, wounded. “What’s wrong with my eyelashes?”
“Lucy, darling, I think it’s just a tad uneven on this side,” Mercy said, showing her. “Maybe by half an inch...?”
“No, seriously, what’s wrong with my eyelashes?!”
Mercy replied distractedly: “Nothing, honey, you’re perfect just the way you are.”
“Mom!” Joe groaned.
“It really is gorgeous,” Mercy marveled as Lucy flitted around her to investigate the hem situation. “And so Christmasy. So perfect for the season. Scarlett, dear, you were right after all, and I’m so sorry for doubting you. I’d just never heard of a red wedding dress before.”
“Mom, it’s not a fucking wedding!” Scarlett exclaimed, for probably the thirtieth time since Thanksgiving. “It’s a nonbinding, informal celebration of an egalitarian romantic partnership. Will somebody please inform this woman that it’s not a wedding?!”
“Yes, yes, of course, whatever you want, sweetheart,” Mercy conceded dreamily.
Joe pointed to Archer. “Isn’t he supposed to not see the dress until the day of or something?”
“What a great question!” Archer replied, still deeply invested in Mario Kart. “You see, that would be the case if this was a wedding. However, I’ve been informed in no uncertain terms that it is most definitely not.”
Scarlett grinned triumphantly at Joe. “There you have it.”
She might snap petulantly, and she might complain, but Scarlett wouldn’t be doing this if she didn’t want to; we were all intimately familiar with the futility of trying to force Scarlett into anything. The not-wedding, as improbable as it seemed, had been her idea from the start. And she wasn’t doing it for herself. She wasn’t even doing it for Archer. Scarlett was doing it for her mother.
The first six months had been hell for Mercy. She didn’t resent me, as I had feared she might; Mercy made that clear, and Rami confirmed it. But she was gutted. She wouldn’t speak of Gwil, wouldn’t listen to us talk about him, locked every photograph of him away in dark drawers, wandered around with a remote, uncanny, unseeing smile until she walked straight into walls; and then she would blink inanely up at them, as if they had dropped out of the sky rather than been built by her own hands. She baked hundreds of cakes and almost never slept. She told us she was fine every time we asked, which was more or less constantly. But on the very rare occasions when she was left alone, Mercy would unfailingly end up in the field behind the Lee house, gazing out into the forest of western hemlock trees with tears snaking silently down her cheeks, the muted light of the cloud-covered setting sun flickering red and furious on her face like wildfire.
And then one afternoon, a package had arrived from Arviat, Canada, where Cato and the rest of the surviving Draghi had relocated shortly after the rebellion at Vladivostok. It was five feet tall and another three wide, and what we found after carefully peeling away all those layers of foam padding and packing tape was a portrait of Gwilym so skillfully painted that it could have been mistaken for a photograph. Mercy had stared at it for a long time—ignoring Lucy’s attempts to guide her away, deaf to any of our concerns—until she at last picked up the portrait herself and said, quite evenly: “I think we should hang it in the living room, don’t you?”
Things had been better since then—very, very gradually, and yet unmistakably—and Gwil’s portrait remained mounted above the living room couch like a watchman, his eyes sparkling and blue, his faint smile stoic and fond and omniscient. But even in the wake of Mercy’s continued improvement, none of us kids were about to risk another agonizingly despondent Christmas. So the solution was obvious. We would keep Mercy preoccupied with what thrilled her more than absolutely anything else: the pseudo-weddings of her children. Rami and Lucy had already secretly volunteered to go next year...and after that, who knew? And there was one other thing that was making Mercy’s burden a little lighter these days.
Charlie sauntered into the living room, wearing an apron covered in cartwheeling Santas and wiping white dust like snow—powdered sugar? flour? baking soda?—from his ungainly hands. He was palpably proud. “The sugar cookies are officially in the oven. And I managed to fit them all on one baking sheet, isn’t that great?! Cuts down on dishes!”
“Why, yes, I suppose it does!” Mercy said, alarm dawning in her eyes. Had my beloved father placed the globs of dough too close together? Would we end up with one hideous, giant monster-cookie? Only time would tell. Providentially, Archer and Joe could be counted on to eat just about anything.
Joe sniffed the air, his forehead crinkling. “What’s burning?”
“Nothing should be burning,” Mercy replied, almost defensive, forever protective of Charlie and all of his profound, incurably human imperfections. Sometimes I thought that she preferred him that way, that he was a link to a simpler world in the same way I had once been, that he was a puddle of memory she could drop into, that maybe he wasn’t so unlike her first husband Arthur. “Not yet, anyway. The cookies need at least ten to twelve minutes at 350.”
“Wait, 350?!” Charlie exclaimed, horrorstruck. “I thought you said 450!”
“Oh, this is tragic,” Scarlett said.
“I can fix it!” Mercy trilled buoyantly, breezing off to the kitchen as Charlie followed after her with a fountain of apologies. She shushed them away affectionately, patting his chest with her soft plump hands, chuckling about how luckily they had fire extinguishers stowed away in almost every closet just in case. And there were other reasons for that besides Charlie’s perilous baking attempts, but he didn’t know them. Now the record player was belting out Queen’s Thank God It’s Christmas.
Archer lost another round in Mario Kart and exhaled a great, mournful sigh. “Hey, Baby Swanpire, can you do something about this guy?” He nodded to Rami. “This is criminal. It’s nowhere near a fair fight. He knows every freaking time I’m about to toss a banana peel.”
Rami smirked guiltily up at me from the couch, not bothering to deny it.
“Do you mind?” I asked him.
“Not at all,” Rami replied. “I want to show this loser I can beat him even without the benefit of mega-cool extrasensory superpowers.”
“Rude!” Archer cried.
“So rude,” Scarlett agreed, smiling.
“Okay, here we go.” I sat down beside Rami, still holding Ben’s envelope in my right hand, and laid my left against Rami’s cheek. And I felt a fistful of numbness—like instant peace, like milk-white Novocain—pass from my skin into his, rolling into his skull, deadening whatever telepathic livewires had been ignited there in the August of 1916. The effect would last anywhere from thirty minutes to a few hours; and it worked on every vampire I’d met so far.
“Whoa, trippy,” Rami murmured. “It’s still weird, every single time.” He peered drowsily around the room. “It’s...so...quiet?! You guys really live like this? No one is constantly bombarding you with sexual fantasies or romantic pining or depressive inner monologues? How do you function?! Now I’m alone with my own thoughts, that’s actually worse!”
“Hurry up and beat him while he’s all freaked out and vulnerable,” Scarlett told Archer.
Archer laughed, picking up his Nintendo 64 controller, radiant with the promise of vengeance. “Yes ma’am.”
“Any good mail?” Lucy asked Joe.
“Yeah. Coupons and a ton of Christmas cards from random people. The vet sent us one with alpacas on it, so that’s cute. Oh, and here’s one from our favorite Canadians.”
Joe held up the card so we could all see. The picture on the front showed Cato and Honora sitting on a large velvet, forest green couch with a hulking Christmas tree illuminated in the background. The others were arranged around them: Austin, Max, Ksenia, Charity, Araminta, Akari, Morana, Phelan, Aruna, Adair, Zora, Sahel, and a few new faces I couldn’t name yet. They were all wearing matching turtleneck sweaters. And every single one of them was smiling.
Joe cleared his throat theatrically and read the text on the inside of the card:
“Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!
(Oh, and Scarlett, congratulations on your not-marriage.)
- Cato Douglass Freeman”
“That bastard,” Scarlett muttered.
Rami offered me his controller. He had just slipped on a banana peel and rocketed off a cliff. “You want a turn?”
“No, thanks though. I have to talk to Ben. Is he around?”
Rami shrugged ruefully. “I would help, but my brain is temporarily broken.”
Scarlett rolled her eyes, taking a gingerbread cookie from the tray and biting into it as Lucy batted crumbs from the red lace dress, exasperated. “I think he’s out in the hot tub.”
“Cool. I shall return.”
Joe took my spot on the couch as I departed, shoveling cookies into his mouth, seizing Rami’s controller and kicking his feet up on the coffee table.
I opened the door to the back porch, and frigid December air rushed in like an uninvited guest. The field was coated with a thin layer of snow, the animals safe and warm in the barn, the garden slumbering. And in the spring and summer, when blossoms of a dozen different varieties came open beneath the drizzling grey skies, Mercy’s calla lilies didn’t bother my allergies at all. Nothing did anymore. Ben was indeed in the hot tub, puffing on his vape pen, wearing only a beanie hat and swim trunks.
“What flavor is that cartridge?” I asked as I approached. “Gummy bear?”
“Close. Strawberry doughnut.”
“Ohhhh, yum!” Ben passed me the vape pen, and I took a drag as I kicked off my boots and sat near him on the rim of the hot tub, slipping my bare feet beneath the steaming, roiling water. Then I handed his vape pen back. “So. Guess what I have for you.”
“Uh.” He glanced at the envelope. “Jury duty.”
“Better.”
“Someone I hate has jury duty.”
I flipped the envelope around so he could see the University of Chicago logo on the front.
“Oh god,” Ben moaned.
“Don’t you want to see what it says?”
“Not really,” he admitted, grimacing.
“Come on, Ben. Open it.”
“Nah.”
“Why not?!”
Ben sighed. “Look, if I open it and it’s bad news, it’s gonna make Christmas weird. Rami will know. They’ll all know. They’ll all feel bad for me and it’ll be pathetic and depressing and awkward. You can look if you want to, just don’t tell anyone else yet.”
“It’s not going to be bad news,” I said, tugging at the floppy top of his beanie hat. He swatted my hand away, but he was smiling grudgingly.
“You have positively no way of knowing that. Unless Lucy’s had a vision I’m unaware of.”
“She hasn’t. You know she never sees anything important.”
“She saw you coming,” Ben countered.
“She saw human-me and Joe in love and gobbling down pretzels at a Cubs game. So I’d say there were at least a few minor details missing.”
“There’s no way I got in,” Ben said, his green eyes slick and fearful and now fixed on the envelope. “We can’t all be geniuses like you.”
“That’s an unfair accusation. I’m far from genius. I’m just obsessed with the ocean.” I’d written my senior thesis on the feeding habits of Pacific angelsharks, and my advisor was still trying to figure out how I, an amateur scuba diver at best, had managed to get so many quality photographs with my underwater camera. The secret, of course, was superhuman agility and not needing to breathe.
“I fucking hate calculus. The MCAT wrecked me. I got a 517.”
“And their median score is a 519, so I’d say you still have a fighting chance. Plus you have like eight million volunteer hours.” Ben had spent the vast majority of the past year either in class or at the hospital. The psychiatrist-in-chief, Dr. Siegel, had been more than happy to take one of Gwil’s foster children under her wing. Every human in Forks except Archer believed that Dr. Gwilym Lee had drowned in a tragic boating accident while he and Mercy were on vacation in Southern California, and that his body had never been recovered. The town had held a wonderful remembrance ceremony and dedicated a free clinic at the hospital in his honor. “Now open it.”
“You do it,” Ben relented finally. “My hands are wet. Go ahead, open it up and tell me what it says. And then kindly euthanize me to end my immortal shame.”
“That wouldn’t work,” I pointed out, tearing open the envelope. I pulled out the tri-folded piece of paper inside, flattened it against my thighs, and read the typed black text.
“...Well?” Ben pressed, vaping frantically.
I looked up and smiled at him.
“No way,” he whispered.
“I hope you like pretzels and bear-themed baseball teams, grandpa.”
And for a second, I thought he might bolt up out of the hot tub, hooting victoriously, splashing water all over the back porch as he danced around bellowing that he’d gotten into one of the best medical schools in the world, that he would be following me and Joe to Chicago. But that wasn’t Ben. Instead, a slow smile rippled across his face: it was small, but perfectly genuine. Pure, even.
“Goddamn,” he said, watching me. Venom doesn’t just resurrect or ruin; it forms a bond that is simultaneously intangible and yet immense. It’s an evolutionary adaptation, a way to facilitate stability and the building of covens in an often violent and ruleless world. And now that he had turned me, Ben had family here in Forks in more ways than one.
“Gwil would be so proud of you, Ben.”
“I hope so. I really do.”
The back door of the house opened, and Joe stepped outside. He studied Ben for a moment, and that was all it took for him to know. “Benny!” he shouted, elated.
“I know, I know. Fortunately, I look amazing in red. Thanks, supermodel genes.”
“This is going to be so fun!” Joe said, sprinting over to wrap Ben—who was characteristically lukewarm on this whole physical displays of affection business—in a hug from just outside the hot tub. “We’re going to go furniture shopping, and eat deep-dish pizza, and find apartments right next to each other, and mail home Chicago-themed care packages, and get you hooked up with some gorgeous Italian woman...or whatever you like, I guess I shouldn’t assume. Women. Men. Gang members. Marine mammals. Jessicas. Whatever. There are options.”
Ben laughed as he playfully shoved Joe away. “Sounds like a plan, pagliaccio.”
“Oh my god, stop learning Italian without me! You realize you have to tell Mom now.”
“I will,” Ben agreed, with some trepidation. “I’ll wait until after Christmas.”
“It’ll be hard for her,” I said. “But she knows it’s what you want. She knows it’s what’s best for you. So she’ll get through it. I think it would be worse for her if you didn’t get in, if she had to see you unhappy.”
Ben nodded, exhaling strawberry-doughnut-flavored vapor, gazing up at the stars, Orion and Auriga and Lynx and Perseus reflected in his thoughtful jade eyes. “She’ll still have Rami and Lucy and Scarlett here with her. And Archer. And Charlie.”
“Especially Charlie,” Joe said, grinning.
Mercy would have to leave Forks eventually, of course. The Lees had already been here for nearly four years; they could stay another ten, perhaps fifteen at the absolute maximum. And there had been a time when ten or fifteen years seemed like quite a while to me, but now it felt like I could doze off one afternoon and wake up on the other side of it, like swimming a lap in the sun-drenched public pool back in Phoenix. We would find a new home somewhere after Joe and I finished our PhDs, after Ben finished medical school, maybe Vancouver or Buffalo or Amsterdam or Edinburgh or Dublin or Reykjavik. Wherever we went, I hoped it wouldn’t be far from the sea. But Mercy couldn’t bear to leave Forks yet. It was the last home she had shared with Gwil, the last house they would ever build together, and leaving it would make his loss all the more irrevocable. She would be ready to leave someday, but not today.
In the meantime, there would still be visits for breaks and holidays. Scarlett and Archer had the shop to keep them busy, a brand new eight-car garage that held a virtual monopoly on both the Forks and Quileute communities. Lucy had opened a bohemian-style clothing boutique downtown, which confounded most of the locals but attracted more adventurous customers from as far away as Seattle. Rami was interning for a local immigration lawyer and entertaining the possibility of applying to U Chicago’s law school in another few years. And Mercy had the farm; and she had Charlie. He had asked her for cooking lessons to try to help rouse her a few months after Gwil’s death, and it had grown from there. If it wasn’t romantic just yet, I believed it would be soon. And there were moments when I thought my father might have figured something out, when his eyes narrowed and lingered on me just a little too long, when his brow knitted into suspicious, searching lines, when the hairs rose on the back of his neck and some innate insight whispered that we weren’t like him and never could be again. But then he would chuckle, shake his head, and say: “You’ve gotten weird, my gorgeous, brilliant progeny. But Forks looks pretty good on you.”
“Can I talk to you upstairs?” Joe asked me suddenly; and did I see restless nerves flicker in his dark eyes? I thought I did.
“Sure,” I replied, climbing down from the hot tub. “Ben, are you coming inside? My dad is trying to bake Christmas cookies and failing miserably. It’s pretty hilarious. Not that you should be the one to critique other people’s kitchen-related accidents.”
“I do enjoy your company a lot more now that I don’t want to murder you and slurp you down like a Chick-fil-A milkshake,” Ben said. “Yeah, give me a few minutes and I’ll be there.” And as Joe and I headed into the house, I saw Ben pick up the acceptance letter that I’d left on the rim of the hot tub and read it for himself with incredulous eyes, grappling with the irrefutable fact that it was his name on the opening line, that he had somewhere along the way become the sort of man who dedicated his immortality to saving lives rather than ending them.
In the living room, Scarlett was back in her yoga pants and absolutely brutalizing Archer in Mario Kart. Rami and Lucy were entwined together on the loveseat, murmuring, giggling, feeding each other pieces of gingerbread cookies. In the kitchen, Charlie was leading Mercy in a clumsy waltz to Meat Loaf’s I’d Do Anything For Love, and each time he fumbled his steps or mortifyingly trod on her feet she would cry out in a peal of laughter brighter than the sun she had learned to live without. Joe spirited me up the staircase, into his bedroom—which, honestly, was more like our bedroom now, in the same way that my room in Charlie’s house had become Joe’s as well—and closed the door.
“You’re in luck,” he said. “Your dad totally ruined our song. Now I can’t hear it without thinking about some moustached guy in plaid trying to seduce my mom.”
“It’s the best Christmas gift I could ever ask for. Meat Loaf is vanquished. Oh, just so you’re aware, Renee and Paul are getting an Airbnb and coming up for New Years.”
“Cool. Do they still think I have a super embarrassing sunlight allergy and will break into hives and asphyxiate and that’s why we can’t visit them in Florida?”
“Yup.”
“Spectacular. Also, can you please tell me what’s wrong with my eyelashes?”
“They’re just a little sparse, amore. But I still like you.”
“Well, I am only moderately attractive, you know.” Then Joe steeled himself, taking a deep breath. Uh oh. He was definitely nervous. I still couldn’t believe I had the power to make him that way, but here we were. “So I get that we’re doing presents with the whole family tomorrow morning, and you do have some under the tree, so don’t worry about that. But there’s one I wanted to give to you alone. You know. With just us. Without an audience. Or whatever.”
“...Okay...?” A secret gift? A naughty gift? “I hope it’s a new vibrator.”
“Shut up,” Joe begged, laughing. “Here.” He reached into the drawer of his nightstand—our nightstand—and produced a small blue box topped with a turquoise bow. It wasn’t a ring, I was sure of that; I didn’t feel especially attached to the idea of marriage, and neither did Joe to my knowledge. How could rings or papers seal commitment when you already had eternity? I was right: the mysterious present was not a ring. When I removed the lid and emptied the box into my palm, what appeared there was a small plastic airplane.
“What is this?” I asked, amused but puzzled.
“Are you not college educated? It’s a plane.”
“Well, yeah, I can see that. But it’s also like two inches long.” I scrutinized the plane. “Are you magically transforming me into a tiny, tiny, little plastic person? Is that my gift? Because I actually got you something good.” And I really did: there was a collection of vintage Chicago Cubs photographs from the 1910s and 20s downstairs under the Christmas tree, packaged in Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer wrapping paper.
“We’re going on a trip,” Joe said, grinning. “The day after Christmas. It’s just a short trip, nothing huge, don’t get too excited, we’re not going to Mt. Everest or Antarctica or anything. I think you’ll still like it. But I don’t want you to know where we’re going until we’re there.”
“How will that work? Considering the tickets and signage and pilot announcements and obnoxiously noisy other passengers and all.”
“ScarJo’s going to fly us.”
“Really?!” We were taking the jet. We almost never used the jet. “What’s in it for Scarlett?”
“She found out that Archer’s never had In-N-Out Burger before and is very much looking forward to initiating him into the cult of deliciousness.”
“Oh nice. I could go for a vanilla milkshake myself, now that Ben mentioned them.”
“Obviously I’m gonna buy you all the milkshakes and animal-style fries you want. Bankrupt me, bitch. But we have to get one other thing taken care of first.”
“So it’s somewhere they have In-N-Out Burger...” I pondered aloud. California? Texas? Las Vegas? I felt a brief but unambiguous pang of homesickness for Phoenix. But there was nothing there for me anymore.
“Stop,” Joe pleaded. “I’m sorry. I’ve already said too much. Please forget that. Get a traumatic brain injury or oxygen deprivation or something.”
“I hate to disappoint you, but I’m rather indestructible at the moment.”
He smiled wistfully. “I wouldn’t want you to be any other way.”
There was laughter downstairs in the living room. I could detect the aroma of a fresh batch of sugar cookies baking in the kitchen, mingling with the cold night air and pine trees and peppermint candy canes. I loved Christmas. The entire world smelled like Joe. The U Chicago décor, classic rock posters, and Italian flag were now interspersed with National Geographic pages and photos of the two of us together. The Official Whatever You Want Pass hung in a small, square picture frame on the wall above Joe’s bed. Our bed.
“How real is it, Joe?” I asked quietly. I climbed onto my tiptoes, linking my hands around the back of his neck with the tiny plane still tucked between my fingers. “Seriously. The wishes thing.”
“The world may never know. Akari never met me as a human, so she wouldn’t be able to say. But if I had to place a bet...” He shrugged, grinning craftily. “Kinda real. Kinda not real. Just like vampires, I guess.”
“I am alarmingly glad that you’re real, mob guy,” I said, abruptly somber. “I never thought I’d meet someone who saw me as remarkable, who could make me see myself that way. And it’s miraculous. And it’s terrifying too, honestly. Being a thing with you. Falling for someone you could have for centuries and lose in a second.”
“It’s the scariest thing there is,” Joe concurred, taking my hand to lead me back downstairs.
Joseph
Scarlett looks like a goddess, and she knows it. But she’s not one of those magnanimous, fragile, harp-plucking, pastel-colored goddesses. She’s ferocity and wildness and crimson like blood, and that’s exactly why Archer loves her. And as they stand in front of the Christmas tree with their hands clasped together—ivory on bronze, snow on sun—with matching sprigs of holly in Scarlett’s hair and pinned to the jacket of Archer’s suit, reciting truths but no promises, I can’t help but watch the other faces in the room: Rami, Lucy, Ben, Charlie, Mom with her beaming smile and shining eyes, the woman I met sixteen months ago and now can’t fathom life without. And it occurs to me for the first time that love, in its cleanest form, isn’t something that changes people as much as it allows them to become who they truly are.
On the evening of December 26th, as soon as the sun dips beneath the western horizon, we board the jet in the Forks Airport hangar. It’s much easier for Scarlett to fly at night; otherwise she has to wear two or three pairs of sunglasses on top of each other, and even then it’s still painful, it still feels like blinding needles burrowing into the jelly of her retinas. That’s not a wrench in my plans or anything. It needs to be night where we’re going, too.
Vampire hyper-acuity notwithstanding, FAA regulations require Scarlett to have a copilot, so Archer joins her in the flight deck with his newly-minted license and spends most of the journey flipping through the latest issue of Motor Trend. As we begin our descent, he peeks back at us and teases: “It’ll be your turn eventually, guys. Scarlett and I did our time. Rami and Lucy can go next year. And after that...unless Ben happens to find someone worthy of a not-wedding...” He wiggles his black eyebrows.
“Bring it on,” I reply casually. “Fake wedding are my jam. It’ll be ocean themed. Or Roaring ‘20s themed. And we’ll all do the Cha-Cha Slide in the living room and shame Ben as a bonding activity.”
“Mercy can set up a mashed potatoes bar,” Baby Swan adds.
“Yeah. With pineapple.”
“No. Not on potatoes.”
“Yes on potatoes.”
“Over my dead body.”
“Too late,” I tell her, touching my lips to the knuckles of her cool, steady hand.
We touch down at a small noncommercial airport just outside the city, and Scarlett and Archer stay back to secure the plane as Baby Swan follows me outside. And she realizes where we are as soon as the wind hits her, as soon as her eyes soak up the sand and cacti and cloudless night sky like rain swallowed up by parched earth.
“Phoenix,” she whispers, smiling like a child.
“But wait, there’s more!” I announce in my best Billy Mays voice. I take the little glass bottle from my pocket, walk across the runway to the naked desert, crouch down when I find a suitable spot, and fill the bottle with dry, sandy earth that crumbles in my palms. Then I seal the bottle with a tiny cork and bring it back to give it to her.
“I know what it’s like to have to leave home,” I say. “You’ve had to say goodbye to Phoenix, and soon you’ll have to say goodbye to Forks, and next will be Chicago, on and on forever. You’ll always be leaving the places you learn to call home. Every five or ten or fifteen years, we start over again. Like a snake shedding its skin, like a hermit crab swapping shells. Like the water that travels from rain to seawater to mist and then back again. But now you can always have a little piece of home with you, and maybe that will make it easier.”
She takes the glass bottle and shakes her head in disbelief, in wonder. Because this is exactly what she wanted, what she needed, even if she didn’t know it yet. “Joe...how did you...?”
“What’d I tell ya? I’m a talented guy. Now you have to dance with me.”
She laughs. “Oh no. Hard pass. I don’t dance.”
“When we’re alone in my bedroom you do. So just pretend we’re alone now. In, like, a really really spacious, sandy bedroom. With probably some lizards.”
“Fine. But only because I’m willing to degrade myself for milkshakes.”
She slides the glass bottle of Arizona earth into her pocket and takes my hands. She’s still a pretty terrible dancer, honestly. She hasn’t lost that. And I love that about her. I love damn near everything about her. And it took me a long time to figure out what exactly her subtle yet peerless cocktail of fragrance is, because it wasn’t somewhere I’d ever been. The scent that drifts from her pores—the scent that now lives in my bedsheets like a shadow or a ghost—is sunlight and heat and clarity and resilience and wisdom older than the pyramids. Her scent is the desert.
Now she’s mischievous, her eyes gleaming with the reflections of the Milky Way and the full moon and the stars that are dead and yet eternal, just like us. “So what, you think you’re Vampire Boyfriend Of The Year material now or what? Some dirt and In-N-Out Burger? That’s the height of your game? Is this what I have to look forward to for the rest of my perpetual existence? I totally should have pursued that polyamorous triad with Scarlett and Archer when I had the chance—”
“Yeah,” I say, very softly, smiling, tilting up her chin to kiss her beneath the universe and all its eccentricities. “I love you too.”
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ONE for 001 for the ask game?
Favorite character: Amelia!!! shes funky and i like her
Least Favorite character: ummmm the fellas fixin up the road in ep 9 on account of workplace safety crimes
5 Favorite ships (canon or non-canon): scentdapack+associated pairs, and whippyseat i suppose if ive gotta choose another
Character I find most attractive/would marry: lumped these together cause my answer for both is the same (none lol)
Character I would be best friends with: atom! contact as well, theyre just little fellas i think itd be fun to chat with em
a random thought: i think alot about liam n amelia's chat in ep 8 after pulling out the stake, particularly regarding how amelias lines are read? i know for a definitive fact that im just digging at nothing but something about their delivery sticks out to me. like it feels odd somehow
An unpopular opinion: oh god ummm i guess i wouldve liked to get more of taylor, particularly i wouldve like to see her interact more w airy. I dont know if its an 'unpopular' opinion per se, but i wouldve loved to see how her views of the game wouldve changed had she stayed on longer, particularly if the frustration she felt by not being allowed to climb the shorter pole in ep 2 wound up building into something more significant. idk
My Canon OTP: none? there arent really any i think?
My Non-canon OTP: scentdapack (PARTICULARLY if theyre qpps)
Most Badass Character: stone. i do not have a reason for this it is completely arbitrary
Most Epic Villain: i mean. i guess airy? depends on what were defining as a 'villan' here
Pairing I am not a fan of: parker n charlotte i guess idk
Character I feel the writers screwed up (in one way or another): i dont really think they screwed anybody up really but again seeing more of taylor wouldve been fun i think
Favourite Friendship: charlotte n subway!!! i like to think shes the most traveled out of all of em and he would just be ceaselessly fascinated by her stories of old life as a consequence. also soda n amelia i like their friendship even if it is a bit underexplored in cannon lol
Character I most identify with: airline food probably tbh
Character I wish I could be: i mean probably none of them all things considered cause going to hell doesnt sound fun but! subway if i had to choose, hes got good vibes ig
#i have the same views on stone that i do on taylor-i think it wouldve been fun to see what wouldve happened had they stuck around longer#particularly regarding how they feel about/react to airy's actions and how they impact them#ask#ask game
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