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holykillercake · 4 years ago

Text

One Year

pairing: Zoro x Reader

word count: 2k

summary: No summary this time. I´ll just say this ¨Bartholomew Kuma and Sabaody¨. Read at your own risk. Seriously, ¨KUMA AND SABAODY¨, do you understand?

highlight: ¨Everyone did their best, but no one could have done better.¨

warnings: angst with happy ending; Sabaody Archipelago spoilers (?)

notes: Hey guys! This was a request from @roronoatrash in which ¨Zoro who has 0 sense of direction seemed to always find his way back to is s/o, and his s/o only.¨. I really hope you like it!💚 This is also the first time I write a Devil Fruit user, so I'm considering a sequel to develop the character and add more humor.

𝕷𝖊𝖆𝖛𝖊 𝖈𝖔𝖒𝖒𝖊𝖓𝖙𝖘, 𝖗𝖊𝖖𝖚𝖊𝖘𝖙𝖘, 𝖆𝖓𝖉 𝖑𝖔𝖛𝖊!

It was a cloudy and melancholic day in the New World. The men on board were leisurely enjoying their afternoon; some drinking, some napping, some eating. The air was humid and cold, and the tides were strangely calm. No one seemed to care. After all, that was the New World.

¨Boss!¨ the lookout shouted from the crow's nest ¨Something is falling from the sky! It´s going to land on deck!¨

All men tilted their heads to look at the sky, watching a tiny black spot become bigger and more recognizable.

¨Is that what I think it is?¨ the captain asked himself, not believing his eyes.

¨Boss, is that a girl?¨

¨Yep, I think so.¨

They stood still watching what they suspected was a girl fall from the skies. The red-haired took a quick glimpse at his first-mate and officers, and since no one moved, he felt safe to assume that that was not a threat. Mainly because whatever was falling towards the ship looked dead already.

The body fell through the main deck and went straight to the lower level of the ship. The captain and his officers stood around the hole on the wooden floor, observing the unconscious and injured body of a girl.

¨I´ve seen some crazy things rain around here... but this is new.¨ he spoke.

They were ready to have someone dispose of the dead body when the girl opened her eyes, putting herself on her shaky legs. Blood dripped from her eyebrows and nose, and she had bruises all over. Her eyes wandered around as if she was looking for something.

¨Z-Zoro...¨ she spoke when her teary eyes met the captain´s ¨I-I need to find Zoro.¨

That was all she said before falling on her knees and collapsing.

</>

Almost a year has passed since the tragedy in Sabaody Archipelago. A year passed since you were defeated in the fight against the marine force. Your gashes closed, and your bruises healed, but there was a wound that would not go away, even after one year.

So much had happened since that day. Luffy had broken into Impel Down, fought in the Paramount War, and lost his brother, Ace. A few days later you received the hidden message he had left you, saying that you were no longer going to meet in Sabaody in three days but in two years.

It took you a while to understand the situation you and the rest of the Strawhats were in, and it took you even more to let go of your selfishness and trust them. The guilt for not being strong enough to protect yourself and your comrades ate you alive during the first weeks, but then you considered how they must be feeling too. No one could have done better.

Everyone did their best, but no one could have done better.

For one year, whenever a News Coo flew by to deliver a newspaper, you would run and grab it before anyone did, hoping to see another message from your friends. But the status of your captain was the only one you knew so far. You knew he was training with Rayleigh-san, and this whole two years thing should have been his idea.

When Bartholomeu Kuma used his Devil Fruit powers on you, you ended up landing on the ship of the Red Hair Pirates. They would always tell you how you rained on their Red Force and broke the deck floor. They said you were looking for someone, and during your stay in the infirmary, you would always call for the same person.

For months nightmares had you waking up in the middle of the night panting and crying. The same one, torturing you in an infinite and merciless loop.

Every detail, color, and noise. Everything was so precise and clear in your head.

When he fought still injured from the last encounter with the Shichibukai; when he stood up and faced the Warlord fearlessly. Even with the damages caused by Kizaru and the Pacifistas, he stood up.

And maybe your eyes fooled you, maybe your exhausted body played a sick trick on you because he was there until he wasn´t.

Right in front of your eyes.

His cropped green hair and tanned skin, the vibrant red and white striped shirt, the scar across his chest, the haramaki, and the swords. Gone, simple as that.

But after all the training that you had with the Red Hair Pirates, you seemed more in peace with yourself. After one year, the nightmares would bother you only every once in a while. You were not prepared for the New World before, maybe still aren´t, but you will get there.

And they made everything easier. It was no mystery why Luffy liked them so much. Whenever you were not engaged in a fight or some other Emperor crap, those guys were incredibly light-spirited. And the moment they realized you were part of Luffy´s crew they treated your wounds and welcomed you onboard.

Shanks agreed to have his men training you, but he made very clear that no one would babysit you, so it was ¨keep up or keep out.¨. You spent most of your time with Yassop, Benn, or Roux, for they were the best in the abilities you exercised.

Inside the Strawhats you were a stealth agent, mostly because of your Devil Fruit, the Nagi Nagi no Mi, once possessed by a Marine Commander. Another Supernova, the Surgeon of Death Trafalgar Law had told you that before shit broke in Sabaody.

You used that combined with your fighting skills to breach the enemy´s first line of defense before they saw you coming. Usually, Usopp would assist you with the sniper training, trade he ¨learned from a friend¨, Sogeking.

His father was an extraordinary sniper, and he used the same kind of firearms as you, differently than Usopp´s slingshot. Benn´s combat skills were remarkable, and Roux was exceptionally fast for a man his size. You haven´t had a lot of opportunities to fight the Red Hair himself, though you had a strong will, his Haki was something you have never seen before.

¨We´re going to a bar, kid. You´re coming?¨ Benn asked you with his cigarette on his lips.

You pondered a little over his invitation but decided to decline it. ¨Thanks, Benn, but I´m keeping a low profile tonight.¨ He nodded and smiled, turning to follow his crewmates ¨Don´t drink too much, we have training tomorrow!¨

The first mate laughed shortly and spoke without looking at you ¨Roger that, kid.¨

You walked the opposite way, wandering between the vegetables and gimmicks tents, feeling the kind sunset kiss your skin. There was some music playing, kids running around with ice cream in their hands, laughing loudly and happily. Marketers were announcing their prices, housewives were thinking about delicious recipes to prepare for their families, and couples would sit together around the font, swearing love to each other.

Every day was like that. The citizens would wish their neighbors ¨good morning¨ from their windows; bakers would open the doors early, letting the delightful smell of fresh bread wake up those who slept in.

How could you, in the middle of all that happiness, feel so sad and lost?

You sighed and made a route change. Maybe you needed a little bit of booze.

The island where Shanks had decided to dock was in the Grand Line, a place where they were known and welcomed. So you knew where they were, and it would be a short walk to get there.

¨Y/N?¨

You turned automatically, thinking that a crew member had gotten lost and was looking for his captain - or boss, how he likes to be called.

But when you saw the man standing in front of you, everything stopped. The music, the kids, and the love promises.

At some point, you started to cry and hyperventilate, believing you were in another nightmare, and you would have to go through that day all over again. Your lover carried pain in his eyes as well, like his fears were the same as yours.

Those minutes you stared at each other felt like hours while you kept every detail of him in your memory. His hair was slightly longer, and his complexion was paler, even with the sunset painting his skin.

¨Z-Zoro...¨ you whispered shakily.

He gave a step forward ¨Y/N... it´s you...¨

You ran in his direction as soon as your name fell out of his mouth. Your arms embraced his neck, and your legs gave up when he held you tight against his body, whispering comforting words as you broke into tears.

¨I...¨ nothing but sobs came out.

¨I know... me too.¨ he fondled your hair and hid his face in the curve of your neck. And there stood the both of you, not wanting to let the other go.

</>

¨How did you know I was here?¨ you asked and he blushed a little.

¨I didn´t... I had to buy stuff for the castle, and I got lost.¨ a loud laugh came out of your mouth. It was so obvious, how didn´t you guess that?

¨They didn´t give you a log pose?¨

¨They did, but I took a nap and when I woke up, I was here.¨

You spent the rest of the day cuddling on the beach sand. Zoro was laying on his back, and you were resting on his chest. You had one year worth of conversation to catch up on, and neither of you rushed to do so. He told you about Mihawk, the creepy island in which the only native habitants were copycat human drills, the boat he destroyed, and even how he begged the Warlord to train him.

The sun had started to hide behind the sea, and the warm sand was cooling down. The sound of the waves crashing on the shore together with the salty breeze made you question if you had died at some point, and that was heaven.

¨You´re paler.¨ he chuckled.

¨It´s not very sunny where I´m living.¨

¨Hm...¨ you hummed ¨And how long did you take to figure out Luffy´s message?¨

¨Oh...¨ he thought for a second ¨ I knew right away.¨ you giggled and doodled on his chest with your finger.

You felt his chest go up and down as he let out a sigh.

¨I missed you, Y/N.¨ he hugged you tighter.

¨I missed you too.¨ you stayed in silence for a few minutes ¨Anyway, when are you setting sail again?¨ You asked him softly, and he tensed up. ¨I know... ¨ your lips began to tremble ¨ I don´t want to go either, but what happened in Sabaody... I don´t want that to happen ever again.¨ you bit your lip as tears started to roll on your cheeks.

He wiped the tears with his fingers and pulled you closer. None of you wanted to part ways again, but not only those were your captain´s order that was your future. If something like that happens again in the New World, a two-year separation would be the best scenario possible.

¨It won´t. I promise.¨

When the night came, you decided to stay on the beach and talked until you fell asleep under the stars. The best sleep you´ve had in a long time. No nightmares, no agony, and no pain. Just the warmth and peace you missed so much.

On the following morning, you helped him get the provisions for Mihawk´s castle. You toured around the city holding hands and joking, kinda like the couples sitting by the font, enjoying every second you had before he left.

If he didn´t get lost trying to go back to Kuraigana Island, it would be a quick trip. You assisted him with the bags and walked him to his boat. Your heart ached to say goodbye to him, but you had to. The circumstances were bigger than the two of you.

¨I love you, Zoro.¨ you hugged him and tried not to cry again.

¨I love you more, Y/N.¨

¨Careful with the naps, ok?¨ he chuckled and nodded ¨One year. We´ll meet again in one year.¨

¨Wait for me. I´ll go get you, and we´ll return to Sabaody together.¨

¨But how will you know where I will be?¨

¨It doesn´t matter where you´ll be. I´ll always find you.¨

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oddaodd · 4 years ago

Text

Concern in Painting

· Tommy Shelby snaps at his wife´s concern ·

Warnings: A bit of angst.

The sound of the car pulling up the driveway and the lights that shone through the window at such an unholy hour at night indicated his arrival. She hadn’t meant to stay awake so late, but her concern for him had been on the rise and it chased her sleep away. A few moments later she heard the sound of his footsteps making their way his study shortly after the sound of the main door closing shut. Y/n sighed deeply. Business was booming and it took a toll on him. Y/n painfully watched as he deteriorated without daring to interfere, knowing that Tommy needed to keep his mind busy as much as he needed to breathe. Nevertheless, she thought enough was enough, she couldn’t just stand by leaving him to deal with everything on his own. She put away her paint and brushes and gave one last look (for the night) at the painting she had started at the dawn that night´s insomnia. She then went downstairs to the kitchen to get some biscuits, knowing that it was more than likely that he hadn’t eaten all day. She silently walked to his study and allowed herself in without pausing to knock.

“Hi” she softly said, not wanting to commit sacrilege by disrupting the peaceful silence that filled the room.

He looked up to see her for just a second and then resumed writing what y/n assumed were letters, merely muttering a “hello” of his own.

Y/n made her way to the side of his desk and placed the plate of biscuits next to the glass of whiskey that was always a staple wherever he was, before perching herself on the desk.

“You need to eat something, love. The maids baked these earlier today”

“Thanks” he said, eyes still glued to his writings, not really paying attention to anything she had said.

She quickly eyed what he was writing, not because she was nosy, but because it had been so long since Tommy had last shared any details about what he did for most of the day. Her eyes widened a bit to see that he was indeed writing letters and that the one he was writing at that very moment was addressed to Winston Churchill.

“Whatever are you writing a letter to Churchill for?” She couldn’t help but to ask.

“Business” was his short answer.

“What kind of business?” She pressed.

“Just business” he replied in a somehow annoyed tone that he had never used before on her.

She tried not to let his tone sting, to no avail. Silence filled the room for a few moments as thoughts about what to say next filled Y/n´s head. Years of knowing the man had taught her that it was best to leave him be when he wanted to be alone, but her concern for his well being prevented her from doing just that.

“Tommy” she warned in a rare softness laced with worry and the tiniest amount of hurt.

He didn’t acknowledge it though, he just kept writing. Y/n sighed and put her hand on top of his, the one that was resting atop of the letter to Churchill, not the one writing it.

“Thomas” she tried again, rubbing her thumb on the back of his hand

The use of his name made him look up at her. She wished he hadn’t, for the look on his face was that of annoyance.

“What?”

She didn’t want to be annoying, but his state worried her more than the worry of being annoying did. “Why don’t you come to bed? Its late.”

He sighed and turned his attention back to the letter. “Im busy.”

“I´m sure you can write that tomorrow.” she hesitantly reassured him.

He didn’t reply, so she went on. “I´m worried about you Tom. You barely sleep, you barely eat, you don’t even talk to me anymore, not really anyhow and…”

“Look Y/n” he interrupted, turning his full attention to her, in a less than caring tone “I have a business to run, if you don’t like it then leave.”

She could have never anticipated his answer and it hit her like a ton of bricks. Her eyes watered and her lips parted a bit in unpleasant surprise at both his tone and harsh words. Tommy saw it, but still he did nothing and went back to writing. She then decided not to push him any further and left the room. She walked upstairs and into one of the many spare rooms, being too distraught to sleep in the bed Tommy and she shared despite knowing very well the prospect of him visiting the room was more than unlikely.

She knew how important his business was and understood the priority, but for a while ( ever since marrying Tommy to be precise) she had allowed herself to believe she mattered as much to him as business. Tommy’s small acts of love backing up her beliefs in days that seemed long gone; all replaced now with indifference towards her that left her with a profound uncertainty about everything and anything. For the past few months he had started pushing her away, allowing her less and less to be involved in anything related to business, making her feel like a total stranger. Still, the deep concern she felt for the man she loved overpowered the betrayal she felt at his words and she couldn’t help it but to mentally forgive him before falling asleep.

She woke up the next morning feeling alienated of the events from the previous night. Had it all really happened, Or had it been it just a dream? Her mental questions were instantly answered when she realized she awoke in one of the spare rooms. Still not fully awake, She started thinking about the day ahead of her, how very dull it seemed. She avoided Tommy (who oddly enough was still at home ) all morning, not knowing for sure how she should act around him anymore.

After breakfast, she found safe haven in the library where her unfinished painting from the previous night awaited her with open arms. With each stroke of the brush against the canvas she felt herself floating away and, entering in some sort of peaceful trance which was only broken with the sound of the library door opening a few moments later.

Y/n knew it was him, but she didn’t dare to look at him. She heard his footsteps coming closer till he was standing behind her and her stool.

“Looks beautiful” came his voice.

“Thanks”

She then stood up and decided to turn around to look at him, knowing the only reason he was home during the day was that he wanted to talk. When her eyes met his tired ones, he felt a pang of guilt. He could see concern and sadness painted on her face and he knew he had to make it right.

“I didn’t mean to snap last night” he confessed.

“I know” she said, barely a whisper.

“I¨m sorry” he sighed, holding her hands in his.

“You don’t have to take care of everything on your own, you know?” She stated before wrapping her arms around his waist and resting her head on his chest. She sighed happily as she felt his arms wrapping around her, making her feel at home for the fist time in wha thad seemed for ever. “I hate what you’re doing to yourself, it’s killing me to see you fade away.”

“I´ll take care” he promised.

“Let me help” she pleaded.

He pulled away to look at her eyes before kissing her softly, hoping with all his might that he never would regret letting her back in by endangering her “Alright Mrs. Shelby”

#Tommy Shelby #tommy shelby imagine #tommy shelby x reader #tommy shelby one shot #tommy shelby angst #thomas shelby #thomas shelby imagine #thomas shelby x reader #thomas shelby one shot #thomas shelby angst #peaky blinders imagine #peaky blinders angst #peaky blinders one shot

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capitainelevi · 3 years ago

Note

5, for the drabble challenge

Thank you for your ask!! ❤️❤️

Drabble challenge: Followers send a number to your ask and you write a drabble using that sentence/prompt in your piece. “You haven’t even touched your food. What’s going on?”

TW: dark themes, violence.

Dream in red

Criminal Levi. Canon setting. Word count: 2112

She was oblivious to the sights her beauty drew to her, giving Levi the perfect opportunity to marvel at the nymph across from him. He took in every move she made, committing to memory the way she loosened her honey-colored hair, which fell to her shoulders, or the way the girl bit her bottom lip in concentration as she rang up the customers of the small vegetable stand. She looked up briefly, and Levi locked eyes with her big, amber-colored ones as she gave him a shy smile. Her fate was sealed at that moment: she was everything Levi had been looking for. The missing piece from his life. Levi closed his eyes, imagining the blood flowing from the blade on his wrist as he plunges his knife in her heart, the light leaving her eyes as the fear on her face shifted to agony.

The last girl barely saturated Levi`s thirst. He wondered if Erwin ever suspected the activities that filled up Levi`s nights and if he was turning a blind eye to keep his most valuable soldier. Sometimes, he imagined the scandal that would ensure if he ever got caught. Humanity`s strongest soldier and also the most notorious criminal Trost ever had. Levi did follow in his uncle`s footsteps, after all.

Killing in the Underground was natural. He couldn`t even remember how many lives his hand took. Even his uncle gave up on him after the first time he found eight-year-old Levi crouched over the body of a young woman, his hands stained with her blood. Levi tried to keep his urges at bay when Erwin brought him up to the surface, putting all his rage and needs in slicing up titan flesh, but it lacked the intimacy he felt when he was in the same room as his prey. Nothing could replace the moment when his victims realized there was no way out for them.

From that day, Levi kept a watchful eye on his prey, learning every detail of her routine, but still keeping a safe distance from the girl. His small fantasy kept replaying in his mind day after day, of her tied to a chair as he prepared his blades to slice up her soft skin.

Climbing up to her bedroom became a routine in Levi`s days and nights. He knew everything her room had to say about her. He knew which book was her favorite by how worn out it was and how her clothes smelled like. At times, he felt so drawn to her he would linger through the night, watching her sleeping form for hours. His hand would slip to the blade in his pocket, wondering if the devastation on his father`s face as he found the light of his life sliced up in her bed would be better than the uncertainty he put the families through, as Levi disposed of all the bodies behind the Wall.

One afternoon, she came out of her house alongside three tall men, laughing with them, jokingly hitting one of them in their shoulder. Levi felt himself burning up with jealousy, his stomach was in knots, and against his better judgment, he started following the small group to the nearest tavern. Levi sat down at the bar, pretending to busy himself with a newspaper, positioning himself so he could steal glances at his small ginger, caught up in a conversation with her friends. His heart almost jumped out of his chest when Petra approached him so she could order her drink, and it took everything Levi had not to touch her. When she took out her pouch, she realized she was short on money when Levi told the bartender he would be covering for her.

“Wait, are you sure?”

Levi didn`t look at her as he pulled a few coins out of his pocket- “Don`t worry about it, just enjoy your drink.”

She eventually gave Levi a big smile and thanked him for the drink. When Petra started making her way back to her friends, Levi got out of his place and stormed out of the tavern. He couldn`t wait any longer. The image of her dead eyes plagued Levi`s days and nights. He needed to make his way to the cabin and get everything ready for his guest.

When the night finally came, Levi posted himself across from her house, waiting for his oblivious victim to fall into his arms. He pulled the hood on his face when the door opened, and the conversation he overheard was both amusing and sorrowful.

“Petra, love, maybe you should have told Oluo to come to pick you up. Too many young girls have been disappearing lately.”

Petra waved her father off, confident nothing would ever happen to her- “I`ll be fine, daddy, don`t worry. It`s just a short walk.”

Her father wrapped his arms around her and kissed her cheek- “I would be dead if something happened to you.”

“Nothing of the sort is going to happen to me, dad.”

Oh, my dove, maybe you should have listened to your father`s warning.

Used to living in the shadows, it was easy for Levi to tail her without her even noticing his presence creeping up on her. Petra struggled in his hold as she felt a hand across her mouth, stopping the air from reaching her lungs. She tried to bite or scratch or hit him, anything to get out of his hold, but as everything started going black, she knew there was no chance for her. I was wrong, dad. I`m sorry.

Levi covered her unconscious form and put her on his horse as he sped up towards the small cabin he kept for entertaining his most special guests. He was bursting up with excitement over the prospect of spending his night in the presence of the most perfect woman he had ever laid his eyes upon. Levi was going to take his time with her so that her death would not be in vain. He was going to take every bit of pleasure he could out of their time together.

After he tied Petra to the blood-stained wooden chair, Levi took a moment to admire her beauty. He ran his fingers through the ginger locks before tracing her plump lips with his thumb, thinking how it was a shame such beauty would be wasted in a matter of hours. How her pretty face would fall victim to decay.

The images in his mind shifted to how their life together would look like, how her sleeping sun-soaked form would look like in his bed every morning, on how he would wake her up with a kiss on her cheek. Levi would prepare her a cup of tea and her favorite dish for breakfast, and she would tell him all about the clients she had to deal with daily. Levi was brought back to reality by a groaning coming from the unconscious ginger, and against everything his instincts urged him to do, Levi made up his decision. Petra was going to live. And she would be his.

Levi shook her awake, and Petra groaned as she started to regain consciousness. She felt like her head would explode, and she couldn`t comprehend why a strange man was urging her to wake up. As memories of her night came flooding back, Petra yelled, trying to get away from her kidnapper. Levi waited for her to calm down as he tried to assure her that she was safe. When Petra stopped yelling, he approached her again, as he took her hand in his and caressed it.

“I followed the bastard here, but he ran away when he heard me approaching. Did he hurt you?”

Petra`s mind went blank as she tried to comprehend how lucky she had been. She looked into Levi`s eyes and saw nothing but concern, and the gruff-looking man in front of her became her hero. Petra threw herself in his arms, and while it was the last thing he expected, Levi didn`t think twice before reciprocating her gesture.

“No. Oh, thank the Goddesses you were here!”

Petra thanked Levi over and over again, wrapping her arms so tight around his body he nearly fell out of breath. He took Petra up in his arms and carried her to his horse to return his woman to his father. For the moment. He was sure he was in Heaven. He could see the relief and appreciation in Petra`s eyes as she told him he saved her life over and over again, and her father threw his arms around Levi the first chance he got.

Levi ignored the older man staining his cape with his tears as he threw his arms around Levi once Petra made her way back to the house- “My son, I owe you my life. Please, come back for dinner tomorrow evening. It`s the least I could do for you.”

Levi accepted the invitation and promised Petra`s father he would brief the Military Police the first chance he got. He just happened to be in the area as he saw the petite ginger`s misfortune of being chosen as the next victim of the newest killer plaguing their city. While they didn`t find any evidence in the cabin, the one Levi made sure to clean before waking Petra up, the Military Police still promised they would not treat this lightly, and it took everything Levi had not to laugh at their empty words.

He bought Petra flowers before coming to her house, and he didn`t miss the slight blush painting her cheeks as he put them in her arms. Petra`s father thanked Levi over and over again throughout dinner, telling him he was a blessing in their lives, and if Levi had any decency in him, he would have left right then. But no. Levi stayed and talked to Petra for hours and didn’t hesitate to accept the dinner invitation for next week.

Levi brought her flowers every time, and after the fourth dinner at her place, Petra asked him if he would like to accompany her to a picnic in the woods. They spent most of the afternoons lying on the blanket, with Levi listening to Petra talk about her childhood and how much she missed her mother, who passed away when she was a teenager. Levi shared a bit about his past, letting Petra know he grew up in the Underground, but realizing it must have been hard for him, she switched the conversation to his time in the Survey Corps and how he became Humanity`s Strongest Soldier.

Throughout their conversations, Levi could notice Petra`s sight swift to his lips from time to time, and while she was in the middle of telling him about her favorite dessert, Levi captured her mouth in a hungry kiss. Despite being taken by surprise, Petra reciprocated, being convinced that Levi was the greatest man she could ever be with.

Being Levi`s lover was hard, as she had to say goodbye to him with every expedition that he risked his life in, but Petra was the luckiest woman alive. Her lover was spoiling her with his attention and love. Every moment Levi got away from the military, he spent in her arms. After six months of dating, Levi announced to her he had a surprise for her, and he blindfolded her as he took her to the small apartment they would be moving in together.

Petra loved Levi more than she had ever loved anyone before, but doubt started making its way into her heart as evidence kept piling up over the months spent together. Such as the bloodstains she kept finding on his clothes as she washed them, after being fairly certain titan blood should have evaporated. Or the nights she woke up to an empty bed, as her lover claimed to have taken a walk outside to help with his insomnia. But no. She was being paranoid. Her Levi was the sweetest man she had ever met. But she had to ask. She needed to be sure.

Petra was lost in her thoughts as she played around with the food on her plate. She had just discovered another bloodstain on her lover`s cravat. Levi`s voice pulled her out of her thoughts- “You haven’t even touched your food. What’s going on?”

She sighed, unsure if she should even word it to Levi, but she knew the answer already. There was no way the kind man she had been dating would hurt people.

“Levi… do you have something to tell me?”

Levi sighed as he listened to Petra voice out her worries, all while pulling his knife out of his pocket.

#I`m tipsy as I`m writing this oups sorry #rivetra #petra ral #rivetra fanfiction #rivetra fanfic #rivetra drabbles #my writing

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poetrusicperry · 3 years ago

Text

A Meddling Friend

charlie dalton one shot

word count: 2,380

warnings: none

notes: soooo i wrote a matchmaker!charlie one shot because i felt like it heh (also there is no way charlie isn’t the best matchmaker around tbh)... here it is (:

A Meddling Friend

When Charlie “Nuwanda” Dalton set out to do something, hardly anything could stand in his way. A meddler by plain terms, Charlie butted his way into any situation, whether he saw a benefit in it for himself or for others. Oftentimes, Charlie’s triumphs would stem from wanting to succeed. In what? The possibilities were endless. He had once convinced his entire chemistry class to fudge their hardest experiment of the year (“Look, the teacher can’t possibly fail all of us; a failure on all of us means gigantic failure on him,” he’d said pointedly), he’d tricked his younger sister into begging their parents for a dog, despite her allergies (when asked about why he didn’t just ask his parents for a dog, he claimed they were much more inclined to appease his sister), and he’d smooth-talked his way into a date to the Ridgeway Junior Prom at a diner in town on a dare (“Now I have a hot date and five bucks from all of you”). His successes were plentiful, and there was no end in sight.

So when Charlie had endured months of secret glances between his best friend, Neil, and Neil’s roommate, Todd (not to mention the awkward, weighted silences and painfully obvious unsaid words), Charlie decided to do what he did best: meddle.

The leaves were in their adolescence on the trees; varying shades of orange and red made campus seem ablaze. Charlie would find himself, on multiple occasions, staring out the window when he was supposed to be paying attention in class. Today was no different– the leaves were beckoning, and Charlie’s eyes sat fixed upon them until he heard his name being called from the front of the room,

“Mr. Dalton?” being at the back of the room, everyone turned in their desks to look at Charlie.

“Yes, sir?” he replied, unfazed. Dr. Hager had begun to go into detail about the question he had just asked Charlie, but Charlie’s gaze was, again, caught. This time, by Todd, who was the only person not looking at Charlie; Todd was looking at Neil. Charlie hadn’t heard a word his teacher had said, more focused on the fact that Todd was gawking at Neil and Neil didn’t even seem to notice. Rolling his eyes at Charlie, Richard Cameron (Charlie’s roommate), raised his hand to answer the question Dr. Hager asked.

“That’s a demerit, Mr. Dalton,” Dr. Hager deadpanned before calling on Cameron. After everyone had turned back around to face the front of the room, Charlie sat forward in his seat, watching Todd, who was still looking at Neil. Upon dropping his pencil, Neil bent to pick it up, locking eyes with Todd on his way back to sitting normally. A smirk played on Charlie’s face when Todd’s face flushed as he turned back toward the front. And Charlie couldn’t help but notice that Neil’s cheeks had also turned slightly cherry-colored as his eyes darted back to his notes. Charlie sat smugly back into his chair and began to hatch a scheme in his head. If he could just get them to admit their feelings for each other, the world would be a better place.

A few weeks prior to the day, Charlie had caught Neil drawing a heart around Todd’s name in the margins of a trig textbook. A few days before that, Todd had read an original poem out loud in their English class that was so clearly about Neil it was painful (“Richest coffee eyes / That paint the stage wonderful”).

Charlie didn’t dare bring up the subject with any of his other friends, but once alone with Neil after Chemistry, he began to work his magic.

“What’s bugging you?” he asked Neil, nudging him slightly as they walked down the hallway.

“What?” Neil returned, confused.

“You dropped your pencil during chem. I’ve never seen you do that. So that either means you were distracted by something, or you were falling asleep, which means you haven’t been sleeping well because you’re stressed out. Which is it?” Charlie prodded, looking at his friend as they continued down the hall, “Come onnnnn, Perry,” he goaded, elbowing Neil, who sighed in exasperation.

“It’s nothing, Charlie,” Neil groaned, adjusting his books in his arms and casting a nervous look at Charlie.

“Lie to anyone else, Neil. Anyone else but me. It’s just embarrassing at this point,” Charlie smirked, “And offensive.”

“It’s just… the play. It’s hard to memorize without help,” Neil sighed before turning to Charlie, “You could help? Do you want to help me, Charlie?” Neil said excitedly. Bingo, Charlie thought.

“I’d really love to, Neil, but I’ve got some Latin stuff with Meeks for the next few days,” Neil sighed, “I do, however, know someone who can help you,” Charlie finished, pleased with himself.

“Who is it?” Neil cocked an eyebrow.

“I don’t know if you know him, but I’ll just tell him to meet you somewhere tomorrow? What time?”

“How do I know this guy isn’t crazy?”

“Again, I’m hurt. You don’t trust me to put you into good hands?” Or Todd’s hands, Charlie thought, laughing to himself.

“Of course I trust you, Charlie, it’s just… I don’t know, I’m stressed out, and my father is all over me, I just need some help. If you know someone who can help, I’m more than willing to accept. I don’t mean anything bad by my reactions, I promise.”

“I know you, don’t, Neil,” Charlie clapped Neil on the back, “At the dock, tomorrow at 4. He’ll be there,” he looked at Neil, “Everything’s going to be okay. I promise,” Charlie smiled as they made their way onto the landing of the boys’ floor.

After parting ways with his friend, Charlie bursted the door to his own room open, startling Cameron, who was sitting at his desk studying.

“Jesus, Dalton, you scared me half to death,” Cameron clutched his chest.

“Sorry, darlin’,” Charlie smirked, jumping into bed (with his shoes still on). He turned onto his back and put his hands behind his head, crossing his outstretched legs.

“Can you look at this trig, see if it makes sense?” Cameron asked, holding his textbook up to Charlie.

“At any other time, any other day, and in any other circumstance, I totally would, but I have some things to plan. Sorry, Cameron,” Charlie shrugged, closing his eyes.

“Come on, Charlie. I rarely ask you for help, and the one time I do, you won’t do it?” Cameron groaned. He opened one eye at the redhead across the room.

“Trust me when I tell you, the thing I’m planning is a lot more important than trig,” Charlie shot Cameron a knowing look, then closed his eye again, beginning to visualize and scheme as his roommate huffed a sigh and turned back around to his desk.

The following day brought giddiness for Charlie; he’d gotten Neil committed to going down to the docks, now he just needed to get Todd alone. The only thing Charlie was still figuring out was how. Todd was the biggest introvert Charlie knew.

Charlie’s proclivity for picking up on the ins and outs of his best friend had led to having more insight into Todd as well. Todd Anderson was new to Welton this past fall. And he was Neil’s roommate, so by association Todd had slowly, but surely (and slightly excruciatingly) joined Neil and Charlie’s friend group. He mostly listened and watched, but always sat near (although not too near) Neil when they were hanging out.

Since they were kids, Neil had always been personable; every new thing he learned about a person, would be spun in a positive way, even if the trait was inherently “bad.” He and Charlie would spend hours talking about people, but not in the “let’s gossip” kind of way– they both found a lot of intrigue in the general population. Even as children they were constantly surveying their peers in a way normal children wouldn’t. When Neil had met Todd, it was no different; he would go on about his sandy-haired roommate for ten minutes straight without taking a breath. Why Todd had transferred schools, where his family is from, what kinds of activities he liked. Charlie found the answers to these questions interesting, but perhaps nothing was more intriguing to him than the fact that Todd had willingly shared all this information with Neil. From what Charlie had experienced, Todd was not a talker, and would rather sit in a painful silence for hours on end than open up to the friend group or start a conversation… but he was doing so with Neil. Granted, Neil asked a lot of questions, but Todd seemed comfortable enough around him to share. That was the first thing Charlie noticed between the two of them, and the catalyst that had sparked Charlie’s master plan of getting them together.

After breakfast, which entailed a small conversation about Playboy models, gross scrambled eggs, and of course, a silent Todd, Charlie hung back to catch the boy before he slipped away to the dorms before class.

“Hey, Anderson!” Charlie called, jogging after him. Todd looked as if he’d seen a ghost.

“H-hey Charlie, what’s up?”

“Listen, I was wondering if you could do me a favor?”

“Um, s-sure?”

“I’m meant to help out one of my friends with his poem later, but I have Latin tutoring with Meeks, and I figured since you’re so good at it, you could meet with my friend to help him out?”

“I… I don’t know, Charlie,” Todd knitted his eyebrows at the idea of meeting and talking to who he thought was a perfect stranger.

“It’d really mean a lot, Todd,” Charlie pulled his most innocent face and looked at the boy in front of him. Todd was quiet still, “Listen, if you really don’t want to, it’s no sweat. I just figured I’d ask you since you’re so good at writing,” Charlie smiled small, not wanting to push Todd that far.

“I… um, no I-I”ll do it. Where?”

“Ah, Todd you’re a lifesaver! It’s 4p.m. at the dock. You’re sure you want to?”

“Yeah, just… tell your friend I’ll be there,”

“I will, thank you!” Charlie called, backing away from Todd and turning away to head to class. I won’t be telling anyone a thing, Charlie grinned to himself, feeling pleased.

When the clock read 3:56, Neil began to get nervous. No one had shown up. Was Charlie pulling his leg? I’ll give them five more minutes, Neil thought, sitting criss cross on the dock and twiddling his shoelace between his fingers. His “A Midsummer Night’s Dream” script sat on his lap, frayed edges and all.

4:04, Neil sighed, looking at his watch. Just as he was calling it curtains for Charlie’s friend, Todd, flush-faced and sweaty, was making his way over to him. He was looking down at his shoes, careful not to stumble,

“H-hi, sorry I’m late, I got stuck in the dining hall behind–” he looked up to see a confused Neil. Neil’s disorientation spread to Todd’s features, “Neil?” he whipped his head around both ways to make sure someone else wasn’t coming.

“Hey, what are you doing here?” Neil stood up from the dock, dusting off his pants and clutching his script apprehensively.

“I… um, I’m supposed to meet… Charlie’s friend… he needs help with–” Todd trailed off, looking at Neil quizzically– “Wait, w-what are you doing here?”

“I’m… supposed to meet Charlie’s friend… he’s supposed to help me rehearse lines…?” Neil’s voice upticked at the end of the sentence, confusion prevalent between the two of them.

“Wait, you’re supposed to meet Charlie’s friend, a-and I’m supposed to m-meet Charlie’s friend, too?” Todd shook his head, unbelieving. Neil’s face changed on a dime, a green light going off over his head.

He smiled slightly and huffed a laugh, “I think we’ve been made, Todd,”

“What? What do you mean?”

“I think we’re meeting… exactly who we’re supposed to be meeting,” Neil blushed, looking at Todd, whose cheeks were rosy from rushing over to the dock (and probably at the situation, too).

“We’re… you’re the friend that needs help with poetry?”

“Todd, I think Charlie meant to get us here alone…” Neil looked to Todd, fidgeting even more with his script.

“W-well why would h-he do that…?” Todd chewed his bottom lip. Neil shut his eyes, almost as if the next thing out of his mouth would cause endless pain. He breathed an unsure sigh,

“Because,” he swallowed thickly, looking at Todd, “Charlie knows I have the biggest crush on you, and this was his way of making me make a move,” Neil’s cheeks were a deep crimson.

“You have a-a crush o-on me?” Todd gestured to himself, bewildered. Neil grimaced and nodded, squeezing the script tighter than before, averting his eyes, “Oh…” Todd’s eyes widened slightly as he looked around them once again, “I… are you sure?” Neil sighed again and sat back down on the dock.

“Yep,” he looked at his hands, the script clutched tightly between them, “I’m sure,” he sounded tired all of sudden. Todd stayed frozen for a few seconds before he trudged over to Neil’s slumped body and sat down carefully beside him.

“I guess Charlie’s g-good at this thing, then,” he laughed incredibly lightly.

“What do you mean, why?” Neil cast a glance up at Todd before looking away again.

“I don’t know… b-because I like you, too,” Todd mumbled.

“What?” Neil looked at him again, not daring to turn away this time.

“I like you… t-too,” Todd’s volume stayed the same. Neil raised his eyebrows, his eyes searching Todd’s.

“Really? This isn’t some prank that Charlie is pulling? You’re being serious?” Neil interrogated, his hands still wrapped around his script. Todd just nodded, earning a huge grin from Neil. Silence fell over the pair and their newly learned information, but when Todd spoke, his conviction surprised even himself.

“So can I help you read lines?” Neil’s smile was vibrant.

“I think I’d love nothing more.”

Charlie watched from his dorm window, smiling as the two boys sat down to read lines. He climbed down off of the windowsill and dusted his hands off, another victory in the books.

#charlie dalton #anderperry #todd anderson #neil perry #angelina writes #dead poets society

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mammonshuman92 · 4 years ago

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- Homecoming -

(Keishin x F! Reader)

Genre: Angst to fluff

TW: none

The past is a fickle thing.

Sometimes memories of days long gone are wonderful. Bringing a certain warmth to your heart. Filling you with a sense of peace and even love.

And sometimes, those memories are anything but that.

They claw their way to the surface, from the pit you tried so hard to bury them in. Wreaking havoc the whole way, pulling at your heart strings and playing games with your mind.

But for him, those memories are both.

The same ones he wants to bury, that give him nightmares at least once a week, are the same memories he holds closest to his heart, never wanting to forget a single detail.

It's been years, but the memories of you excite him and fill him with warmth, just as much as they tear him apart. Leaving him feeling empty.

It's almost as if he mourns your death, although you're very much alive. With how abruptly everything happened, and how quickly you had to leave, he sort of does mourn for you.

But, life goes on right?

He works at the shop, helping his mom. He coaches the volleyball team now. And he plays with the Karasuno Neighborhood Association team, too. He stays pretty busy most of the time.

Even still, you're there in his mind.

"You're... leaving?"

After you told him the news, he went blank. Time seemed to stop. He couldn't believe it.

You were moving back to America.

Your family moved to Japan the summer before fourth grade, after your father received an amazing job offer he couldn't refuse. When school began, Keishin was the first friend you made. After that, the two of you had always been inseparable.

School was set to start in just a few weeks, the two of you going into your first year of high school. Except now, he'd be attending the school you both wanted to go to by himself..

"Keishin?"

The sight of you, voice breaking, tears threatening to spill over, was almost more than he could take. He had to steel himself if he was going to make it through this.

"Hey, it's alright. Don't cry, okay? It's not like you're gonna be gone forever right? It's just temporary until your folks can get things settled in the US, then you'll be back." His voice was calm and soothing.

The company your father worked for was opening a new office in the US, and wanted him to lead the project. It was a big deal and a great opportunity for your family. But that didn't make it hurt any less.

You nodded and rubbed your eyes with your sleeve, sniffling. You quickly threw yourself at him, wrapping your arms around his neck, burying your face in his shoulder.

He put his arms around your waist, pulling you close to him. He tried as hard as he could to memorize everything. The smell of your hair, the way you were embracing him. How the delicate gold necklace he gave you with his name on it looked against your beautiful skin; the way you fit perfectly in his arms. He wanted to remember everything.

Deep down he knew that this was it. You wouldn't be coming back.

He blinked a few times upon opening his eyes. He looked over at the clock on the night stand, the bright glow of the numbers read '2:13 am'.

He groaned and rolled over onto his back, staring at the ceiling. This was the second time this week his last memory with you had awakened him. It's been years since that day, but it haunts him just the same.

"Get over yourself, idiot. She's probably married with kids now. Besides, she probably doesn't even remember you.." He whispered to himself sourly.

At the time, he didn't think that'd be one of the last times he'd ever talk to you. The time difference between Japan and the US is substantial, not to mention the charges. you were able to talk a couple times, but ended up losing contact. You were starting a whole new life and he was trying to pick up the pieces of his. He didn't push the issue either. More than anything, he just wanted you to be happy.

With a heavy sigh, he rolled onto his side, pulling the blankets over his head. Trying to think of something else. Anything else. It was always hard to fall back asleep after the memory of you invaded his mind.

"You look like shit."

Keishin looked up to see Takinoue Yūsuke, his friend and teammate, both former and current, standing on the other side of the counter, looking at him.

"Can I help you?" He asked, ignoring his friend's statement, continuing to read his newspaper.

"We still on for the scrimmage match tomorrow?"

The Neighborhood Association team was set to play against the Karasuno boys team, to help them get in as many practice matches as they could.

"Yep. Still going out for drinks afterward?" Keishin asked.

"Of course." Takinoue laughed slightly, then cleared his throat.

"It's been over a decade, man. It's still waking you up?" His friend asked quietly.

Keishin sighed and put the paper down. He picked up his pack of cigarettes and lit one, choosing to ignore his friend.

"I remember how bad it messed you up, when she left." He said quietly, glancing at his friend trying to gauge his reaction. You had always been a touchy subject, no matter how much time had passed.

Keishin stood up, got the broom and started sweeping. Anything to try and get away from the conversation, but Takinoue just followed him around the store.

"It's been so long, man. Have you thought about moving on?"

He was barely sixteen when you left. So, of course he'd dated other people. They could just never compare to you.

"I've dated." He replied, as he continued to sweep. He really didn't want to have this conversation right now. Or at all, for that matter.

"If you could call it that." Takinoue whispered to himself.

"Look, all I'm saying is try, ok? Or at least think about it?"

Keishin stopped sweeping and turned to look at his freind with a questioning look.

"Why the sudden interest in my love life?" He asked him.

"You mean the lack thereof?" The man teased, making Keishin roll his eyes.

"Your mom talked to my mom about how she's super worried that you"ll never get married and you're almost thirty, and my mom convinced me to talk to you."

"Hey! I have a few more years before I turn thirty!" Keishin shot back, causing his friend to laugh. That would be the part he was most concerned about.

"You don't have a girlfriend either." Keishin shot back.

"Yeah, but this isn't about me." He chuckled. "Well anyway, I'll tell her I talked to you. Think about it though?"

"Yeah, yeah." He agreed, waving his hand around.

After a few more minutes, Takinoue left, leaving Keishin alone with his thoughts again.

He wasn't really interested in dating, honestly. He'd pretty much given up on it. He didn't want to spend his life alone, but he was sure he wouldn't find anyone like you.

The two of you only got to date for a few months before you moved, but that's not what always kept him hung up on you.

You'd been best friends for such a long time. You grew up together. Hell, even your parents became friends. You knew everything about him, because you had practically been there for it all. You understood him better than anyone else ever could. He never really had to say much to you, or explain anything, you kind of just knew. Like you could read his mind. You never complained about always playing volleyball, and helped out at his family's store during summer vacation.

As sappy as it is, the two of you fit together like pieces of a puzzle. Filling in the spots the other was missing and working together to make the end picture beautiful.

There would never be anyone else like you for him, and he knew that.

After he graduated, there were so many times he thought of going to America, hoping that he'd be able to reconnect with you, but gave up on the idea. What if you didn't want to see him? What is you didn't even remember him? As amazing of a person as you were, he knew that you were living a good life, and were most likely seeing someone and he didn't want to intrude.

Keishin plopped down into the chair behind the counter, and lit another cigarette. It was almost time to head over to the high school for volleyball practice. He couldn't wait for something, anything, to take up his attention and stop the current depressing state of his thoughts.

It had been a couple weeks since his conversation that day with Takinoue, but he hadn't really given it much thought since then. He didn't have the time. The team was going to Tokyo soon, and they were getting in as much practice as they could. They had one more match set up with the Neighborhood Association team, before their trip. His busier than usual schedule was helping to keep him out of his own head, thankfully.

Before volleyball practice, he made a quick stop at the market to see Shimada, to talk about the upcoming match with the association team.

"Yeah, I'll for sure be there. I also want to get in at least one more practice session with Tadashi before you guys leave for Tokyo. He's making great progress."

"I can tell he's really improved." Keishin agreed.

"Oh, before I forget. I know you don't like talking about it, but I'm pretty sure I saw Y/N a few days ago." He said, carefully watching his friend, trying to gauge his reaction.

Hearing your name caused him to tense, a lump forming in his throat.

"It was probably someone that just looked like her." He finally managed to say.

"Hmm, maybe. But I was almost positive it was Y/N."

"It's been a long time. I'm sure she doesn't look exactly the same." Keishin said. How many times had he sworn he saw you in a crowd?

He quickly ended his conversation with Shimada and left. He didn't want to talk about it anymore.

He sighed to himself and made his way to practice.

As soon as he walked inside the gym, Tanaka and Nishinoya bombarded him with a string of questions.

"Who is she?"

"She's so pretty!"

"Why'd you keep her a secret, huh?!"

Keishin glared at the two boys. "What are you going on about now?"

"Your girlfriend! Why didn't you tell us about her?" Tanaka demanded.

"Yeah! She's like, an actual goddess. How did you land her??" Noya interrogated.

"What? I don't have a girlfriend." He explained.

The two boys tilted their heads to the side like a puupy.

"Oh. Well, there was a solid 12/10 here looking for you earlier." Tanaka explained.

"Huh?" Who could be looking for him?

"It was probably someone looking for information on how to make a donation to the team or something." He quickly explained, shutting the boys down.

Still, he couldn't shake this feeling he had.

The next morning at the store, as he was knelt down stocking shelves, the bell above the door chimed, alerting him of a customer. He called out his usual greeting, but the response he received all but stopped his heart.

"You're a hard man to find."

Is that..? It can't be.. He thought.

That voice.

It sounded like music. Sweet like honey.

His heart was racing, his hands getting clammy. He swallowed hard, and took a deep breath.

There's no way..

He stood up slowly and turned around. His eyes as big as saucers when they fell on you. Was he actually asleep right now, having the dream. This couldn't actually be happening..

You took a step forward and smiled. The same smile that was forever etched in his mind.

"Hi, Keishin. Long time no see."

"Y/N..?"

*PART TWO COMING SOON*

#hiakyuu #ukai keishin #keishin x y/n #haikyuu angst #haikyuu fluff

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snapefiction · 4 years ago

Text

#21. Christmas Present - Snapemas Challenge

A/N: Day 21 of Snapemas! I hope you like it! This one is a little bit longer. I hate proof reading so much it stops me from uploading Christmas is so close now! I can't wait! ahhhhhhhh I will upload more - I promise (I just dunno when)

Idea from @deepperplexity ´s Writing Challenge ! Check her Writings and the other Snapemas posts out! :)

❤️ Please remember that English isn’t my native language and that my Writings will include Mistakes and maybe weird formed sentences. ❤️

Pairing: Severus Snape x Professor!Teacher

Warnings: Mention Cursings, Slight NSFW mention of cookies - might make you hungry - atleast I got hungry - I love cookies

Word count: 5941

Y/N - Your Name, Y/L/N - Your last Name, Y/H/C - Your Hair Colour

#21.Christmas Present

,,O-Oh Professor Snape, before you leave I uh wanted to ask you something." In response he just rose his eyebrow and stared down on you. You laid down the Silverware on your Plate as the other Professors continued to eat their lunch.

,,I saw that you have quiet a big collection of books and I wondered if you're in possession of one I have been looking for to read for very long." Sighing he wetted his lips. He wasn’t even hiding his boredom. What a great Start, you thought to yourself.

,,Which one are you looking for?" Smiling you set your drink aside. ,,It's a rare one from Scotland. ,The correct way of Potion brewing and wild Herbology'." Now his face looked like your answer might actually have impressed him. ,,I am able to call one of these copies mine."

,,Oh really?" Your excitement seemed to confuse him slightly so you fixed your posture, flattened down your dress and collected your words together. ,,Would you mind if i would borrow it?" You followed him like a lost Puppy as he kept walking down the great hall.

,,You can pick it up tomorrow after lunch at my chambers."

,,Thank you, Professor!“ Smiling you first thought about hugging him but as your arms almost flew around him you backed up and held out your hand. ,,Sorry." Thinking about wether he should take my hand or not he finally decided to get up only to turn around on his heels. As always he vanished within seconds into the dark corridors. The Butterflies in your stomach went crazy now so you just tried to hide your smile as got up yourself to walk the other way leading towards your classroom.

In the next Morning you hurried your whole way up to the mountain where you just recently found a dead Acromantula. It has been two days ago when you have had spotted her. Actually you intended to let her rest in peace but you really wished you could give Severus something in return of his grace. So you quickly pulled out something out of your bag to catch the rare venom dripping from it's teeth. Actually it could become quiet dangerous up in here but since you went there almost everyday you felt more than just safe.

After the jar was full you went on your way back to the castle. It wasn't a too long way. It only took an hour and a half and you also got to take some ingredients you needed for your classes with you too. After you got everything secured in your class stocks and changed your dress you went to lunch. Severus already sat at the unpredictability long table. Smiling you sat down next to him trying to hide your excitement. A good Book was always making you nervous. Not to mention a Book you have been looking for since so long and loaning it from a person you truly kind of liked?

,,Hello Professor Snape, I hope you're doing alright?" You chattered but got interrupted as the food appeared on the table. He wouldn’t have continued the Conversation anyways. After something that felt like an eternity but turned out to just have been 20 minutes you walked next to Severus towards his chambers. You told him about the new Paper you got from the Ministry about magic beasts - even if he didn't asked for it. But you knew if you didn't want to walk in silence you would have to talk yourself.

,,Theres even an article about Muggle Medicine in it. They test it on animals. Did you knew that? That’s so cruel.“ You noticed how he rolled his eyes on your words but you just simply knew he didn't dislike you as much as he disliked Gilderoy Lockhart. As you reached his door he quickly opened it with his wand. ,,Enter." Allowing you to step into his chambers. Nervously you closed the door after you. As he went to his shelf to look for the book you quickly opened your bag. He was quicker than you were so he just stood in front of you and held out the book.

,,One second - I almost got it!" And just by that you were able to grab the small jar. After you held it into the light and put it in his hand you took the book in return. Already admiring the Front Cover.

,,I know it's not much, but I just wanted to give you something as appreciation for the loaning." You Mumbled while scanning the little details stencilled in the edges.

Curious he inspected the label. ,,Where did you get it? So freshly?" Professor Snape quickly asked now, surely interested.

,,I uh - from the left Mountains. I found a dead Acromantula two days ago. I thought the Venom might come in handy for potions." You now looked back up at him. Your smile was wider than usual, you were just so happy about the possibility to finally read this book.

,,It - uh - yeah. Do you know the value of it?" His eyebrows arched.

,,Of course I do. But there's nothing as value as finding something you've been looking for since a long time." You smiled mumbling as you now opened the first pages of the book. Small golden details shined into your eyes. ,,Wow." You mumbled. He didn't even try to hide his stares at you as you looked through the pages and you could feel how he tried to be nice for once.

,,Would you like to sit down and have some tea? You can read it here while I'm brewing and prepare my-“

,,I'd love to." You admitted. Your eyes connected instantly as you closed the book to press it on your chest while sitting down on his couch. The first few moments as you sipped your teas remained silent until you just couldn't take it anymore.

,,Where did you get it? The book I mean." His beautiful dark eyes finally dared to look back at mine and he explained.

,,Hagrid is friends with someone who knew the Author. So as I once helped him out in his garden he just gave it to me." You felt like his voice was more quiet than usual and you had to listen even more carefully. His voice made something blossom inside of you. Butterflies flying, Flowers blooming, Sunshine finally hitting my skin? It felt all the same- incredible sweet and addictive.

,,That's very Kind." The Afternoon continued. Your Conversations were really short but you enjoyed every word. He chooses his words wisely which was the total opposite to you. You spoke as soon as a small thought came to your mind trying to fill the silence. It was like you balanced the Smalltalk out. Spending time with him meant learning to worship his words and worship a peaceful silence. As the Clock strikes 7pm he looked up to you. You grabbed your Coat. ,,Are you going to eat Dinner tonight?“

Shaking his head he pointed to a tower of Notebooks, meaning he was still to intertwined in his Job Tasks.

,,I See.“ Chuckling you pushed a strain of your Hair behind your ear. ,,Thank you for letting me read the Book and the Tea. I really enjoy it.“ For a second he just looked at you before his lips parted.

,,You can stop by and read anything you want, whenever you want.“ Listening close to his voice you noticed how his Perplexity from earlier hasn’t faded yet. But before he’d cancel his Offer you accepted.

,,I’d love to. I´ll see you tomorrow then, Professor.“ Waving over to him you turned around to walk to the great hall. Your Cheeks still beheld the pink touch you got from when you were around him. It was calming you to spent Time with him. You felt more relaxed than sleeping out, hearing rain or hearing your favourite song. He made it all better, he made you feel more safe than anyone else by just offering you tea. Dear Merlin, do you even listen to yourself? How can you be so in love with him after just 5 Months working at Hogwarts?

As your seventh Month at Hogwarts began so did the Winter Time. Christmas was only three weeks ago by now. It was till too long for you liking. Yesterday, a rainy Sunday you started to bake cookies and slightly decorate your room more festive. The Holiday Spirit already took you over in July and now it was finally your favourite time of the year. Smiling you walked over to Severus Classroom to meet him for your daily Meetings. You came here daily to read, grade Papers from your students or just drink some tea with him. It became a loved habitat of yours and he seemed to enjoy it himself as he grew to become a friend of yours. Knocking he almost instantly let you in.

,,I´m already making Tea. I´ll be right there.“ You heard him shout from the Kitchen.

,,Okay.“ You responded as you quickly laid down all your Notebooks you still had to grade and placed the box filled with cookies on his Table. You made some just for him knowing he has a sweet Tooth. Who else would drink their Tea with at least two or three tablespoons of sugar if it wasn’t their sweet tooth speaking out of themselves. Slightly chuckling you sat down on one of the Students Desks to start grading. You could simply work better on one of these as on one of the Teachers Desks. They just seemed too tall and too uncomfortable for your liking.

,,What is that?" Curious you turned around. ,,What's what, Professor?" He rolled his eyes as he heard the name you used. ,,On my desk."

,,I made cookies for you." As he continued to stare at you, you began to explain it to him. ,,I made some chocolate chip cookies, cinnamon ones and some plain ones. I know you like pumpkin so I bought some special cookie cutters at Hogsmead last week." Smiling you went up to the box, opened it up for him and showed him the small pumpkin shaped cookies.

,,See? Do you want to try some?" With caution he carefully took one and bit the half of it off. Waiting for his reaction as he chewed then putting the box aside and going back to your seat. ,,Do you like them?" He still kept chewing.

,,Actually- yes." A small smile made it's way across his lips and he ate the other half too.

,,I really hoped so." Sitting back down you waited until your Cup of Tea which now flew towards you sat in front of you. Severus always made the best tea.

Grading the last Homework you walked over to Severus huge Library Wall only to take the Book you used to read in the Daily. With butterflies in your chest you continued to read the few last pages of the book. You only had one third of the book left and by all means you wouldn't want to lose your tradition. So it happened that you started to reread the pages twice so you would have to spend more time with him or just in his chambers. Actually it’d only take you around 3 days to finish this big book but you didn’t wanted your shared time to end. The time has passed so quickly that you could feel how your body resisted to leave as it was time for dinner.

,,Are you coming with me for Dinner today?“ Severus just smiled. He was already done with his Papers and laid aside the Newspaper he just began to read.

,,Sure.“ He said only to follow you. He told you about something that had happened in his class today and about what he just read in the Newspaper.

,,No way!“ You Laughed grabbing his Arm in disbelief. ,,Imagine this happening to you- Merlin!“ Now he had to chuckle as well. He could make you laugh louder than anyone else. His dry Humor was just the best. After Dinner he walked you to your Chambers and you thanked him as always.

,,Good night, Severus. I see you at Breakfast.“ He put on a slight smile.

,,I´ll see you at Breakfast.“ His dark silhouette faded in the corridors and so did you in your chambers.

The weeks until Christmas was just a few days ago were just stressful. You and Severus almost never talked and just worked which was kind of tiring you but you knew as closer as Christmas was around as closer was the Relief of all this Stress. After Lunch you planned to head straightly back to Hagrid helping him taking care of new magical Creatures he cared for. The small Bowtruckles were new here in this Region and you were too eagerly happy to get a chance to study them and present them in your classes next year. After downing your Tea you wanted to say goodbye to Severus before leaving but he stopped you at the end of the great hall.

,,Um err- would you mind meeting me later in my chambers? I've got something for you and - err- maybe I can cook dinner for us.“ Severus nervously stuttered while hiding his face with parts of his hair. He always made pauses while talking but you could tell he was acting a little bit shy and nervous. Smiling you nodded in agreement. That’s be a great opportunity to give him his Christmas Present you just finished.

,,I'll be there by 8." He quickly left your side in his well known manner. With his flying cape, showing off his presence. As he was gone and you couldn't hear his footsteps anymore you began to notice how red you turned. Your whole face was warm and your heart flattered. That always happened when Severus is near you. You had to admit, you like him. More than just a regular coworker. More than a friend. Maybe that's why you hurried the whole day to be there perfectly on time in front of his Chambers. Your heartbeat crawled up into your head and your hand was slightly shaking. Nervously you fixed your hair one last time and knocked ever so slightly.

,,Come in.." Severus quickly opened the door. ,,Please, come in." He tried his best to smile warm-hearted but you could see him being nervous again.

,,Good evening." He kept his Head low. You'd love to see his face.

,,Good evening , how are you?“ The both of you talked about your day and silently took a seat on the couch after finishing the smalltalk. The warmth of the Cabin reached you to the armchair. Severus sat across of you and began to rumble with his words.

,,I - Yesterday I went to Hogsmeade. I had to get some books and ingredients. And erm I - I came across the jewellery store and uh something catched my eye. I bought it for you." You felt your cheeks glow again. Severus stood up to grab a small package from above the cabin. For you?

,,But Severus- you didn't have to." Flustered you accepted the package as he handed it to you.

,,But it's almost Christmas and I really wanted to get you something." He almost whispered. With slightly shaking hands you opened it up. A small silver Hair needle fell into your hands. It was very pretty handcrafted and at the top was a green stone. It looked like it belong to a Slytherin and you couldn't help but smile. It was the prettiest thing you have gotten since a long time and it really made your heart flatter. The beautiful silver and the pretty green made it look like it belonged to someone royal.

,,It's so pretty." You looked up to his curious eyes. ,,Thank you so much , Sev. I don't know what to say." Small tears formed in the corner of your eyes and you couldn't help but cover your mouth while looking at the beautiful accessory. The Stone seemed to shine because of the dim light from the cabin. He really got something for you.

,,You like it?" Severus asked and his nervousness faded.

,,I love it." With a bright smile you stood up and fell into his arm. Crossing your arms around his neck and thanking him a million times. As you slightly let go of him you looked at him joking. ,,But you know those aren't my house colours right?" Again he smiled.

,,I know. I - I wanted to give you something that uh reminds you of me." Your smile faded and now the first tears started to roll down your face. It was such a thoughtful gift with a great meaning. You couldn't remember getting such a thoughtful and nice gift ever before.

,,Is everything okay,dear?" He hasty insured while checking your face.

,,Yes." You took a deep breath. ,,Yes. I will just dearly miss you over the holidays." He softly cupped the side of your arms and petted them before pulling you close again. This Time you could directly listen to his heartbeat. It was the first time he hugged you. You always hugged him but he never tried to hug or touch you.

,,I'll miss you too, I guess." He said almost cooing. ,,But maybe we can meet sometime? I mean only if your schedule allows and you're willing to-"

,,I'd love that, Sev." Now he pushed you away a few inches to look into your face. Your Tears already have stopped now by the feeling of being flustered taking over.

,,Sev?" He asked now.

You chuckled. ,,I think that's a cute nickname." You stated and he couldn't help himself but smile as well. He liked it too. ,,Are you ready for your Present?“ As you sat down again , took out the present of your small bag you began to nervously smooth out the edges of your wrapping paper. ,,I feel like I should have get you something else after receiving your gift." Embarrassed you turned red and handed it to him. But Severus didn’t mind, excited he opened it up. After holding it in his hands he began to smile widely. A black scarf which- for once- matched his height and wasn’t way too short like the regular ones.

,,Did you made it yourself?" He asked after noticing his small initials stitched into the fabric as he brushed over them with his fingertips.

You nodded. ,,Yes.“ Smiling he moved closer to you and pulled you into a hug. ,,That's the best thing I've ever gotten." He admitted and enjoyed being close to you in this intense Moment.

,,I'm glad you think so." Feeling relief you noticed how short your breath has gotten by now. What’d you give to be even closer to him by now. Seconds passed and you didn’t let go of him, you simply didn’t dared to. The Moment he’d let go of you, you’d miss his touch instantly. But when his tall hands slowly stroked over your back you didn’t felt like he’d want to let go as well.

A loud knock made you both tear apart. Scared you looked back to Severus. He looked as confused as you did.

,,Enter.“ Grabbing your Wand you got up, walking together with Severus to the door to see who interrupted you.

Hagrid almost tripped into the Chambers. ,,Ms. YLN, here you are. I need ya help! It’s about the Babies.“ He looked so panicked and your heart almost ripped apart but you just gave Severus a quick smile.

,,I´m sorry, I erm it’s urgent. .. I uh can be back in an hour. Is that alright?“ He quickly nodded and by that Hagrid grabbed your Hand to rush after him. Following this Giant Man you sighed. There was no worse timing right now. He pulled you right out of your Bubble of being close to Severus.

,,What happened to them?“ You asked him as he continued to hurry towards his hut.

,,Somethin´ in da forbidden Forrest bid them. Dunno know what to do!“ Pressing your Lips together you thought about Spells which could help you. If they were so small it could quickly be too late for any help if they didn’t got the right help. Quickly running to the small Baby Bowtruckle laying on Hagrids Table you inspected their wounds.

,,Shh, it’s okay. Let me have a look.“ The tiny leg was bent in weird directions and a small bite was visible. Taking out your wand you quickly healed the wound and took care of the small lad.

,,Do you have an idea what could’ve bitten them?“ Hagrid just shook his head. Sighing you let the Bowtruckles walk over your hand.

,,I can take them with me. It’s not the same like the forrest but they could grow up being safe.“ Hagrid helped you bringing them to your classroom before you quickly hurried back to Severus. Hopefully he wouldn’t be too mad.

Knocking you flattened the wrinkles on your dress. Severus opened the Door rather slow. He nervously scratched his head. His black hair was now tucked behind one of his ears.

,,I wasn’t expecting you to be back so quickly. Or to return at all.“ He admitted and you could already smell the Dinner he was cooking.

,,It was about the Bowtruckles I told you about. I brought them to my Classroom. Now I’m all yours, I promise.“ He let you slide inside and as you watched his movements you noticed that he was as flustered as you were.

,,If you want to you can keep reading until I’m done cooking?“ His Insecurities were still visible but as you smiled at him his tension faded.

,,Sure.“ Approving his idea you made your way to his living room as he continued cooking. As you watched him buzzing around in his kitchen from afar you opened your hair to adjust the hair needle he gifted you earlier. It fitted perfectly. A lot of hair needles were to short for your long yhc Hair but this one could hold everything in place easily and made you feel like a princess. You walked over to the mirror on the wall to look at your hair. You really liked it more this way. He got you the perfect present. Happy about the present you sadly realised how you forgot to bring your present for him at your chamber. You knitted him a scarf because you noticed how he never had one besides him. The green and black matching the house he was the head of.

,,You truly are beautiful." You slightly got scared as you didn't noticed how he stepped behind you. Your cheeks directly became red again. ,,Thank you.“ He took the Book from the top of the shelf where he lastly placed it only to put it in your Hands.

,,I´ll try to hurry.“ He assured before heading back to the kitchen.

If your students would hear his voice right now they would highly doubt it was him. His usual demanding voice now was low and casual and by that he went into the kitchen. Sitting down on his Armchair you could sometimes hear him mutter some small words like ,Fucking garlic' or something else which made you smile even more.

Who would have thought that you would sit on his Armchair on a peaceful night , reading a book as he was cooking for the both of you? It was almost like a date. Well actually that wasn't true. It felt like the future you wished so deeply for as a kid. The only difference was that you imagined it to be your husband but you didn't mind it being Severus. You knew he would never feel the same as you do. It was okay. It truly was. Sometimes you wished you could show him some affection- but he wouldn't like it. Being friends - which was obviously a huge step to make - was totally enough. You could hide your feelings if you had to. Having a good friend was all you ever asked for so you shouldn't bother yourself or even him with feelings who could ruin it all in a minute.

,,In 10 Minutes Dinner will be ready." He loudly announced from the kitchen. Surprised you looked up. He still hurried around the kitchen. Slowly you turned back a few pages. As you were lost inside your thoughts you couldn't remember what you just have had read. Putting a small paper in the book between the pages and closing it you had to sigh. Soon it will be Christmas and it would be your third one in Hogwarts. Maybe Severus would be here? Lost in your thought you walked over the kitchen where you spotted Severus opening some Wine. His arms pulled the cork without any sign of effort.

He scanned my face with his eyes and then made his way over to the oven where he pulled out some casserole. It smelled like heaven and soon the whole kitchen had it in the air. His movements made your Thoughts wander. His Arms were so strong- you never seemed to notice before.

,,Whats on your mind?“ Carefully he added a few last ingredients to the food as he pulled you out of your thoughts.

,,I erm was wondering how you celebrate Christmas?“ You lied blushing as he caught you thinking about him.

,,Actually I don't celebrate it. I don't celebrate anything." Shocked you now looked at him.

,,Not even your Birthday?" He shook his head which made his hair whip.

,,Not even my Birthday."

,,Severus! Who hurt you?" He had to laugh about your unbelievable expression. While pulling out a chair for you.

,,There's no sense in celebrating alone." Severus simply stated, pushing your chair slightly towards the table.

,,Thanks.“ Mumbling you thought about this nonsense. ,,Of course it is! I do it too." You added.

,,Then how do you celebrate it?" He now asked curiously and looked at you sitting down across of you.

,,I always celebrated it with my Family but since I work at Hogwarts I just.. spend it alone. Anyways firstly I get all the presents for everyone and make sure they arrive at the right place. Then I get a Christmas tree and decorate it. Afterwards I bake some cookies and in the evening I sit down to read a book and eat all those cookies. As simple as that." As you finished you expected him to say something but he kept on listening to you. ,,It sounds a little bit sad but it isn't that bad. I uh I try to enjoy my own company." Severus felt a little bit of pity. He knew you are really attached to other people and knowing you spend days which are important to you alone made his heart sink. He simply knew too well how being alone feels like.

,,As I already said, I uh would love to see you.“ He tried to uplift the Mood and placed some Food on your Plates. Nodding you thanked him. ,,I can’t wait.“ You admitted again and held up your Glas of wine.

,,Thank you for cooking for us and thank you for your present.“ He copied your movements and you slightly pushed your Glasses together. After you both took small sips from your wine you began to dine. His eyes always made sure you weren't spitting it out or something but actually you haven't had any reason for it.

,,It's really delicious. I never knew you were such a great cook?“ He chewed up and answered chuckling.

„I haven’t cooked for you before. Or anyone in general, so how would you know?“ You joined his chuckles and took a sip of wine again. As you tried to stretch your legs a little bit you accidentally touched his leg. Instantly his glance got up to yours and you pulled back your legs. It was like a small electric shock. A good one indeed.

,,S-Sorry." Blushing you locked my eyes with your plate. Your heart was pumping so fast you couldn't taste anything of the food in your mouth anymore. Your nerves got foggy and your hands numb. Carefully you pushed around some broccoli on your plate. You liked touching his leg but he did he too? Did you reveal yourself? Carefully looking up he did the same thing you did a few seconds ago. Moving around some veggies on his plate. Was he bored of you? You didn’t knew. The air filled with so much tense it got harder to breathe. Biting on your lip you got an idea. It would cost some courage but it wasn't impossible to do. If it would fail you could simply excuse yourself by it being an accident but right now you had to know how he'd react. Laying down the silverware silently you carefully stretched out your leg towards his.

Now your legs were touching and you didn't dare to look up. The silence thickened and as it almost got too much he laid down the silverware himself and put one of his hands on your knee. Too excited your breaths got irregular and you could feel his heat storming through your body. With his thumb he started to draw small circles on your leg and as he continued for a while you looked up to him. Your face was probably fully blushed but he didn't seem to care. His dark eyes which have never looked this dark locked with yours. His expression didn't reveal anything. Was he enjoying it? Was he doing it because he thought it was what you wanted? Well, it was what you wanted but he just isn't the type of guy who'd do anything just because he think you’d expect it. Slowly his hand started to wander. A few millimetres upwards and you almost couldn't help yourself. Your thoughts wandered to things you could never say out loud. Imagining his fingers on places of your body you usually only touch myself.

As you realised how shaky your breath left my throat you grabbed your Glas of wine and flushed it all down. A small smirk appeared on his face.

,,Some more?" Quickly you nodded. You´d say yes to anything he would ask you to right now. He had the full control over you, you thought. How could a simple man make you so weak within seconds?

,,Want to continue this on the couch?“ Quick your legs pushed yourself up from the chair and you walked over to the living room. Not being able to answer him with your words. The whole Situation just became more interesting than you firstly anticipated beforehand. The mood has completely changed. There was something else in the air which you haven't felt before that intensive. Severus again opened another bottle of wine and now sat down directly next to you. He never did that. Usually there was atleast one pillow size distance between you or he sat in his Armchair. But now his legs touched yours and his arm touched yours as he leaned forward to the desk to reach for our glasses.

,,Thanks." You whispered and you felt like as if this wasn't anything you could dream of. The smell of his Aftershave filled your nose and the fabric of his trousers against your bare knees got you shaking. Silently you drank the first glass in silence. But at our second Glas he laid his hand on your leg. Not on your knee. On your Leg. Right before the fabric of your skirt started to hide your skin. Did he knew what he did to you? Could he feel your heartbeat? Could he feel your butterflies?

Closing your eyes I felt the alcohol hitting your nerves. It wouldn't take much to make you drunk but right now you felt like you would need every drip of any type of alcohol you could possibly get. Carefully you moved your head to your side to look at his face. He softly swung his wine in his hand and drank it too. His pink small lips cupped the Glas corner and his hair flew a few inches back as he put his head into his neck and drank up. As he stood his Glas back down you wanted to be more offensive. He seemed to be interested, you thought. Slowly and with my glance on the cabin you widened your neckline to reveal more of my chest. His eyes hushed over to see what you were doing. Slowly, torturing slowly you revealed a small part of your throat. Continuing you showed him more and more. His hand on your leg clutched his fingers a little bit stronger into your flesh. You continued until you almost revealed your bra. As you looked over to him now he smiled slightly.

,,You're beautiful." He whispered. ,,I can only repeat myself.“ Slowly you pushed your weight a little bit up to sit down on his lap. His Hands instantly guided you. Making sure you were comfortable. Now you could hear his irregular breath as well.

,,I really like you, Severus." You admitted as you hugged him closely again. His Hands again rubbed your back and as you felt him stiffen under you you almost inaudible moaned. Hoping instantly this wasn’t the day he’d break your heart by telling you to back off.

,,The last few months uh I felt like I was acting like a freak and it took me some time until I understood that I maybe just got confused by something. Or someone." You now stopped in your tracks to look at him again.

,,Someone?" You asked.

,,You." His cheeks were red. ,,I really like you." He didn't knew where his courage came from but he knew it was the right time to finally admit it.

,,Really?“ You couldn't move out of fear of scaring him and his feelings away. Your heart beat so hard you feared he could see it banging from your chest. Did he really just say that? Or did the wine you had at dinner fogged your senses. Did he really just admit that to you?

,,You Don't have to feel the same but I wanted to let you know that i like you more than just friends.“ As he intended to back up a little bit you quickly moved towards him and pressed your lips against his. In your chest was a firework exploding and butterflies from the night escaping to your stomach. Softly he kissed you back and put his hands on your hips where they used to rest until the kiss was paused so the both of you could catch some air.

,,I like you too. More than just friends“ You whispered smiling.

His lips brushed against your earlobe. The words he spoke made your emotions going even more crazy. You could scream out of tension, happiness and even more out of lust. Being this close to him made you go crazy. You wanted to have Sex with him all night and at the same time you felt like this was an even more intimate Moment than you ever had before.

,,Would you like to stay for the night?" His raspy dark voice sounded like it just got even darker than before.

,,I’d love to.“ And again his Lips touched yours. Slowly and more passionate this time. The Night continued in more and more Intimacy. The Both of you wouldn’t spent Christmas alone this year nor the following ones.

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tartagilicious · 4 years ago

Text

[CN] Lucien’s Birthday Date 2020 (eng translation)

💌 this is coupled with a rumours and secrets that I’ll publish in the next day or so! they’re connected, but context is not extremely necessary to understand the date.

—

Today is Lucien’s birthday. But what’s different from the days in the past is that today is a more special day. In the morning, he’ll report on the topics that he has studied for many years. On the projection screen, a series of large characters detailing, “Monthly Injured Patient’s Cognitive Change of Different Emotions and Intervention Measures for Emotion Recognition After Injury.” are displayed.

I sat quietly in the back of the lecture hall, watching Lucien walk into the lecture hall. After getting to know Lucien, I know that he’s always been studying many things himself. Although I don’t quite understand his subject, through the whispers of the audience, I know that this is one of the major issues that have been valued by the brain science community, and has yet to be resolved.

Lucien stood in a formal suit on the stage, and looked down around the seating area. He stopped for a few moments while looking in the direction I was, then walked to the podium.

Lucien: About twenty years ago, Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI), the cognition of a traumatic lunatic injury, was a topic that was of not much concern to anyone. Usually people think that this is a treatment experience, or the baggage is caused by the patient’s own psychological changes.

Lucien: In a 2012 study, it is estimated that 54-60 million people worldwide suffer from TBI each year. 2.2-3.6 million people suffer from moderate to severe damage each year. In recent years, with the advancement of science and technology, we have been able to monitor the changes in various physical data of patients with brain injury by using high-end equipment.

Lucien: We found that emotional changes are cognitions in traditional psychology. It may be caused by physiological changes in the patient’s brain itself. Therefore, along this line of thinking, I conducted an in-depth research plan on the mechanism of emotional cognitive changes in TBI patients to determine the principle of change.

Lucien: Based on the guidance of the research results, intervention measures for post-injury emotion recognition for TBI patients was also formulated.

Lucien dropped each word calmly and carefully with his speech. The report on the screen is displayed neatly page by page. Most of the people below the venue’s stage were quiet, and except for the sound of rustling pages.

Lucien: People with TBI may also experience their anxiety increasing after living with TBI. After TBI, anxiety may aggravate other cognitive dysfunctions. For example, the ability to recognise emotions. Compared with positive emotions, it is more difficult for people with TBI to recognise negative emotions such as anger, fear, and sadness.

Lucien: Next, I will introduce the data based on a group of 25 participants.

In the lecture hall, scholars and researchers from all over the world are witnessing this together. How many years of research did it take to get to this moment?

I was in the last row of the lecture hall, so i secretly photographed Lucien and inserted it into our commemorative album,

It was noon when Lucien left the research venue. I left the building early and waited at the door, carrying a box of cake and a bouquet of flowers. When seeing him, I solemnly handed over the bouquet.

MC: Professor Xu, that’s hard work.

Lucien glanced at the cake box in my hand. His eyes fell on my calm face and his eyes squinted thoughtfully before taking the bouquet.

Lucien: Are you planning to “surprise” me with this year’s gift?

MC: This bouquet of flowers is for Professor Xu’s hard work, not a birthday gift.

I smiled and raised the box of cake in my hand, and sincerely looked directly at Lucien.

MC: But sometimes, the surprise isn’t so foreseeable, and is more unexpected and magical. Anyways, every time I make a small move, you’ll guess at the end. So, it’s better to go the other way to be more generous. I hope this year’s birthday, everything will start with you.

Lucien: So… I can do anything today?

The voice is a little low in the autumn breeze, like a fallen leaf kissing the water’s surface. Meeting his gaze, I nodded happily.

MC: Today is the third birthday I’ll be able to celebrate with you, and is the day when your years of research has temporarily come to an end. On such a special day, your mood is the most important!

MC: I want to accompany you to do all of the things you want to do, instead of letting you meet my expectations. In order to deal with various different situations, I made sure to make a special heat preservation and storage for the cake.

Lucien: If i want to do many things, will it be a big trouble?

MC: It’s your birthday today, it’s principle to accept the wants of others freely.

Lucien: So what if there are a lot of things and we can’t finish them today?

MC: Then we’ll do them tomorrow, the day after tomorrow, the day after that tomorrow, and continue until we finish. Anyway, I have a lot of time. So you don’t have to think too much, you can just do whatever you want.

Lucien slowly blinked after hearing my answer. He lowered my eyes, not knowing what he was thinking.

A few days before the report, Lucien was more silent than usual. I didn’t have much work, so I just stayed quietly by his side.

The autumn leaves rustled. Lucien raised his hand to straighten my hair tossed by the wind and then touched his forehead to mine.

Lucien: That…. Are you capable of being unhappy?

A few words slipped quietly into my ears, making me a bit stunned. Lucien’s expression is still very pale. The corners of his raised mouth kept a fixed arc, and his eyes are brightened by the autumn light as they look straight at me.

I couldn’t help but take a breath. The cool greenery smells like flowers June, filling my whole heart and swelling my lungs.

MC: Of course I am.

Lucien breathed after hearing my answer, his mouth opening for a moment.

MC: Although I hope that on your birthday, you will be happy. But if you aren’t happy, I’ll be unhappy with you. I will be with you. I;ll spend all the unhappy times with you, so we can wait for the moment when happiness comes together.

“Happy Birthday” should be a blessing, not a shackle.

Lucien smiled. The bright autumn colours covered his eyes. It was just like the moment he explained on stage just minutes ago. I shook the cake box.

MC: So, where does Professor Xu want to spend this special day?

He raised his head and looked deeply into the distance.

Lucien: I thought of a place, but it’s a little far away. Would you like to go with me?

MC: Of course!

After a few hours’ drive, we came to an old street. Although it’s old, it seems like it’s constantly being repaired and refurbished. I visited this same place once when I was very young, and today’s scene is completely different from my vague memory.

People have soft memories of the old city always renovating every stone tile. Everything that had originally been put up is slowly being watered down. Until one day, quietly at the time, Lucien’s memory had always been good, but this time it seems to be slightly slow.

He would stop at a certain street corner and glance indifferently; he would also look around at the fork quietly, as if the choice was not in his memory.

I followed him quietly down the paved road. We climbed the ramp and went around for a long time. After a few confirmations, Lucien finally stopped. In front of us is a silent and empty space.

I secretly peeked at Lucien and found that his expression was still clear. It’s like looking into the distance without seeing anything in front of you. Across this open space, his eyes are vacant.

I retracted my eyes, also staring at the clearing in front of us. I feel faintly that I can guess where this place is.

Lucien: ___, let’s go sit there for a while.

Lucien pointed to a bench facing the clearing. I took his hand and sat there with him. The midday afternoon in late autumn was a bit cold, and the whole world was so quiet that the only sounds were our breathing, the exhaled white mist whirling in the air and disappearing silently.

I looked at the clearing, imagining what it once looked like. Maybe it used to hold a small bungalow in the old days, or it may have been a courtyard.

Lucien: There used to be a small bungalow here, do you know what it was like?

Lucien’s voice suddenly sounded. I was stunned, and momentarily even wondered if my imagination had a distinct sound to him.

MC: I saw that kind of house when I was a kid, but I can’t remember exactly.

Lucien: The bricks of the house were a little mottled white, and the roof was covered with red tiles. Because it’s on the hillside, they often blow away. On special occasions, a row of small blue and white flags would be hung on the leaves. When the leaves blew, it looked beautiful when sitting in the courtyard.

Following Lucien’s description, I closed my eyes while imagining the open space.

I felt Lucien holding my hand, and he wound our fingers together, holding them as close as possible. I was about to open my eyes when Lucien’s voice continued.

Lucien: Open the gate outside, you can walk into the yard.

MC: Will there be flowers in the yard? Lucien: Yes, there is a row of small flower beds on the left, but the owner is always busy, they often forget to water them. So, they don’t look too healthy. The door is in front of you. When you open it, there’ll be an occasional squeaking sound.

I nodded subconsciously, feeling as if I had really walked through the small yard and opened the door. Some stale air was opened along with it, welcoming the return of a long-lost gentle memory.

MC: What about after opening the door? There is an ordinary entryway. Where does ___ want to go?

MC: (you can choose between left, right, forward, and upstairs) I want to go right.

Lucien: On the right is the living room. Although it’s called the living room, there are actually bookshelves everywhere.

MC: Is there no study?

Lucien: In fact, it’s because the study can’t fit those books that the living room has filled up a bit. In the centre is a very soft sofa. In autumn, sunlight will shine through the floor-to-ceiling windows to the sofa.

Lucien: There is a set of very expensive speakers on the opposite side of the sofa. It was specially bought by the little boy’s father for the purpose of listening to classical music.

MC: It must be very comfortable to listen to music while reading a book on the sofa.

Lucien: Actually… the most comfortable place is the rocking chair by the french windows.

I felt a familiar temperature on my left side pushing slightly into me. Lucien seemed to have adjusted his posture to be leaning onto my shoulder.

Lucien: To the little boy in this house, the rocking chair at that time was just the right size for him. When he was tired from reading, he could turn over and sleep with a book. When the weather is good, the rocking chair will be gently moved by the wind.

I seem to be standing in the living room wrapped by bookshelves, and staring at the floor-to-ceiling windows. There was a small child, hugging the book in his hand tightly, and curled up in a slightly swaying rocking chair, sleeping in the brilliant autumn light.

Maybe it’s just an ordinary dream, like his peaceful daily life, gentle and precious.

We returned to the hallway again.

Lucien: There is an ordinary entrance, where does ___ want to go?

MC: (given the same options, left, right, forward, and upstairs) I want to see the upstairs.

Lucien: There will be a staircase through the living room. When you step on the board, it will creak. Immediately after going upstairs, you will see a small living room.

MC: Is it also full of bookshelves?

Lucien smiled, soft laughter in my ears.

Lucien: Unfortunately, you’ve guessed correctly. Maybe I’ve remembered it wrongly, but this seems like not a place to live in, and rather a bookstore. But the little boy’s parents should distinguish between functions -- after all, it is a little closer to the study.

Lucien: If you are tired of reading books in the study, you can just walk out and continue in this small living room.

MC: And when you’re tired of reading in this small living room?

Lucien: Go down to the large living room and have a look.

I was amused by his banter. The whole house seems to be full of books at every corner, accompanying the people in this house to explore the ends of the world.

MC: What’s on the second floor?

Lucien: On the left side of the small living room, there is a long corridor. The first door is a large bedroom, and at the end, there is a room on each side. On the right is the study, which contains more materials, and the books placed highly are all professional books.

Lucien: At that time the little boy couldn’t even read the words on it. A large English-Chinese dictionary and English-English dictionary are placed next to each other.

MC: You must understand it now, right?

I said this with emotion, and Lucien on my side was a little silent. He seemed to be remembering something again, and slowly opened his mouth.

Lucien: I should have understood it when I was around sixteen or seventeen.

MC: ….

MC: Let’s leave this room that doesn’t belong to me.

The low laughter clung to me, making me almost want to open my eyes and tell him to respect the natural gap between people. But I thought about how there was one last room left, so I finally took a deep breath and decided to ignore the constant laughter.

MC: What about the room on the left?

Lucien: That’s the little boy’s room.

Following Lucien’s words, he steadily let me open the last door.

MC: Does this room also have a lot of books?

Lucien: No. There are no books in the little boy’s room. His parents don’t want him to read all the time, so they don’t let him bring books there.

MC: There was really no books?

Lucien: Actually, there are two books under the pillow.

When Lucien said this, I couldn’t help laughing.

Lucien: Here is a very small and ordinary bedroom, with a bed, wardrobe, and a little desk...

MC: Wait a minute, there is no book, what does the little boy do at the desk?

Lucien: He plays puzzle games.

MC: Huh?

Lucien: For example, Kong Ming chess, chess, element matching card games…

MC: That doesn’t sound like a puzzle for children…

I couldn’t help but smile, and I got a deep laugh from Lucien.

MC: But.. it really seems to be an ordinary child’s bedroom.

Lucien: Because the special place lies elsewhere.

This time Lucien held my hand and stood up.

Lucien: Don’t open your eyes.

While Lucien said this, he pulled me forward into a walking pace.

Lucien: In the little boy’s house, there is a balcony.

The brilliant autumn light sides through my eyelids and hits my retina, shining slightly in the closed world. I felt as if I was really under Lucien’s lead. I closed my eyes and walked slowly across the bedroom, going to the balcony.

Lucien stopped and leaned into me from me.

Lucien: ___, open your eyes.

The gentle autumn breeze rolled up the golden osmanthus in the sky. At that moment, Lucien and I seemed to be standing on the balcony of the old house, fluttering colourful flags that fly happily in the wind. The mountains and flowers in front of me lay behind clouds shifting in the wind.

Lucien: The balcony of the boy’s room is the best place to see the scenery around here. There will be fireflies in the mountains on spring nights, like the secrets of the mountains. In the summer, the streets are always lively. The elderly will play chess on the side of the road, the children will play nearby, and they will also run to the observation deck on the mountain to see the fireworks.

Lucien: In autumn, when it rains, the sound of rain hitting the wood is very comfortable. The whale world is drenched by the splashing rain, and everything is in mist. It rarely snows in the winter, but there are very small snowflakes. He often imagined the whole mountain covered by heavy snow.

Lucien: The little boy’s father told him that the world is big, and there are many secrets in the world. You will meet them, and you will like them.

I open my eyes and stand in the middle of the open space, looking at the mountains. The mountains in front of us were nothing but empty silence. The golden osmanthus swayed slightly in the wind.

When we arrived at the viewing platform on the mountain, the sun had quietly descended.

Lucien: Sorry, I let you be with me all of today.

MC: If you can do more foolish things like today, I’ll be happier.

Lucien smiled lightly and took my hand, sitting in the long seat of the pavilion. The street lamps on the road up and down the mountain had begun to turn on, looking like small candles at first glance.

The same small handmade cake was finally put on the stone slab after a whole day of rushing. Looking at this cake, I thought of the old house in Lucien’s memory, and the little boy lying on the balcony looking into the distance.

MC: Lucien, how do you feel about yourself when you were a kid?

Lucien: Why did you ask so?

MC: Just suddenly curious.

Lucien was silent for a moment, but I didn’t look up at him, instead keeping my eyes on the decorated cake in his hand.

Lucien: So, what does ___ think about herself when she was a kid?

I raised my head and pursed my lips, looking at the blurry lights in the distant city.

MC: I miss her. She is clumsy. Also very reckless. She just did what seemed great at the time. Looking at the words she once said, I’m embarrassed and unable to look back on them without laughing at her.

MC: But, she was so sincere and brave. She made me the person I am now, and I am very grateful to her. I just don’t know if I’ve become the kind of person she imagined… if so, even enough.

Lucien: Yes. You must be the kind of person she wanted to be.

Lucien put his hand in his lap and looked at the dim lights with me.

Lucien: If I could see myself when I was child, I actually don’t know how I would feel. There were so many things that he didn’t understand at the time, so much he thought would have a specific answer. Including happiness, sadness, fear… and love.

Lucien’s voice is calm. It’s not so much talking about himself as a child, rather, he seemed to have pulled him away to simply evaluate an individual.

Lucien: He is very far away.

MC: No, you’re too harsh on him.

Lucien: What?

MC: “People are good at different things” Just like some people can’t understand science, his weaknesses are placed in a more special space. He may only understand those things more slowly, more deeply, and better in the future. And it is precisely that kind of person that gradually became the Lucien in front of me.

I light a candle. Against the light, Lucien’s face was extremely soft.

MC: Happy birthday, Lucien. Lucien has been working hard this year! If you were too far away when you were a child, just look at this year as your one-year-old self.

Lucien heard me say this, seemingly as if he hadn’t expected it. He looked at me with interest.

Lucien: Why do you say so?

MC: I think “birthdays” always cut life into different stages.

There is a new toy at 7 years old. I want to fall in love when I’m 15 years old, and want to take a good university entrance exam at the age of 18. Looking for a job at 22, and owning a house at 30…

“Birthday” seems to be an invisible reminder. You will look back on this day as a new person, and realise you’ve entered a new stage.

MC: Starting with a little Lucien, Lucien at every age is connected together to become the person he is now. This “year old” Lucien has used the academic report to mark the new year perfectly. He’s full of curiosity about the world and is still on the road to discovering the truth.

MC: He was a little nasty, always showing me questionable sides of things and teasing me… but such a Lucien is very good. I hope that future you can do what you want to do and become the person that you want to be.

MC: You don’t have to be happy all the time, but i hope that you can think of me first when you’re unhappy. Let me be with you always.

There are tiny petals of the golden osmanthus in the wind, like flowery waves reflected in the candlelight. Lucien’s eyes are shining brightly, filled with the night sky and autumn leaves.

Lucien: I will.

He did not say thank you as usual, but solemnly and sincerely left a promise, or even an oath.

Lucien: I’ve thought about my wish for this year.

Under the small candlelight, Lucien lowered his head, slowly raised his hand and wrapped his left fist in his right palm before looking straight at it. After a long time, he raised his head.

MC: Seems to me like you have a lot of wishes this year?

Lucien: I’m not only making a wish. There are also some words that I want to tell them.

Lucien looked at me. He didn’t explain who “they” were, just as he hadn’t explained the owner of the house. He knew I would know. Probably in this aspect, Lucien is actually very clumsy. And it’s this clumsiness that lets him become so real and complete.

MC: By the way, this is this year’s birthday present.

I took out the souvenir book from my bag that I had restored after a long time. It lies with a small wooden box with grids drawn over the lid, every part of it covered with stickers by me.

Lucien: It turns out that you’ve hidden a lot of things in your backpack.

MC: Maybe. This is our souvenir book this year. This year is also very thick.

Lucien slowly turned over the thick album. Summer camp in Yuelao Temple, Lucien’s home,the orphanage, in the classroom, the amusement park, the farm, the oil painting hall.

We have so many new memories.

MC: This is a previously out of print book. Although my craftsmanship isn’t very good, I did my best!

Lucien: you’ve worked hard, ___.

MC: This is the “Blind box project”!

I solemnly took out the small wooden box and started introducing it to Lucien.

MC: There’s a total of 60 grids. When you’re unhappy, just pick a grid to open. There may be gifts in it, a sentence, or a picture. The only requirement is that you must summon ___ to complete it with you.

Lucien: 365 days, and only 60 grids? (bahsdhj mood)

MC: Mr. Xu, 60 days of unhappiness is a lot. I hope you won’t open them all so quickly.

I went to stare at him a little furiously, but found his smiling eyes.

MC: You teased me again!

Lucien: ___, thank you.

The sky gradually darkened. The lights of the city slowly lit up under the mountain like a touch of gentle blessing. Maybe for anyone, the world was monochromatic at the beginning. With time and encounters, let it slowly be stained with colour, and give different people and things their own value.

Slowly, the whole world became colourful. It worked with memory, with smell and sound. After the most special existence appears, the colours of this world will be more distinctive. It’s like refreshing an entire picture, so that everything has a new meaning.

While we quietly shared the cake, I looked at Lucien’s face lit gently by the warm lights.

MC: Lucien, you’re now in colour.

Lucien froze for a moment, then smiled meaningfully. He ate the last bit of cake and finally sat next to me. It is rare that he carries such a sweet fragrance on his body, and even the breath that comes close is sweet.

Lucien: ___, to me, you are more than colour.

#mlqc #mr love queen’s choice #mlqc cn #mlqc lucien #mr love queen’s choice lucien #lucien #xu mo #I like your words magic man

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martialstories · 4 years ago

Text

Tape to tape - Chap. 2

Coops - High School AU

All credits for the world & the characters for @lumosinlove. I’m kind of sad that SW is ending but luckily there’s still Coast to coast left and 12 days of ficmas isn’t far away.

I wrote this fic(of a fic) before the last chapter was out. In case someone hasn’t read it yet, I won’t tell any details but I have to admit that the ending was far better than I could have hoped for. I was literally jumping up and down after reading that❤️

Happy reading!

_______________________________________________________________________

Tw: child abuse (not direct but definitely implied)

In the three months that Sirius had known Remus they had gotten pretty close. Sirius had to admit that he enjoyed being with Remus but he was rather surprised that Remus seemed to also like his company. You see, Remus was one of those people who was rather popular with his peers. Remus had adjusted to the team quickly and found his place easily. Of course there were some people who didn’t like him but he didn’t care about them. Luckily Remus had found his place within the better people in Sirius’s opinion.

Sirius on the other hand couldn’t usually come along with people like him. Or rather people like him didn’t like Sirius’s closed off nature. Remus seemed to be an exception. They had spent a lot of time with each other in practice and school as they shared the same French class and usually paired together in training and he hadn’t (yet) gotten sick of him.

Autumn was finally starting to blend into winter with temperatures dropping and sun rising later each day. This also meant Sirius’s birthday was getting closer. He didn’t really enjoy his birthday as it didn’t come with any special occasion in his family. Somehow his parents seemed to be even more annoyed by him around his birthday which resulted in Sirius getting a few punches more than usually. Especially his father seemed to consume rather impressive amounts of alcohol around this time as well.

Previous years he hadn’t had anyone who genuinly wanted to wish him happy birthday and pay attention towards him. Of course his teammates wished him happy birthday but they didn’t really notice his sullen mood and certainly didn’t bug him about it.

”Sirius, are you sure you are okay? It’s just that you seem a little quieter today than you usually are.” Sirius was stretching in the gym with Remus. They had already figured this routine that worked well for them. They both liked to stay and stretch well before showering so why not do it together?

”Yes. I’m fine.” Sirius answer came out maybe a little harsh but on his defence he was tired and just wanted to get to his bed and sleep. This wasn’t the first time Remus had asked the question and somehow it was getting harder and harder not to lose his temper.

”Okay, I believe you. I was thinking, we could maybe do the run together that we are supposed to do over the weekend. Since your birthday is on Sunday maybe tomorrow?” Remus asked.

”I think you should go alone this weekend. I’m going to be pretty busy.” Sirius said while l lying on his back and stretching his thigh.

”Oh. That’s alright.” Remus sounded a little upset and they sat in silence for a few moments.

”Are you really fine Sirius? I mean you just seem-”

”YES! I am fine, Remus! Just stop asking. Please.” Sirius let out a shout. He closed his eyes and sighed little. What are you doing? He is just worried. Sirius rose from the ground and walked to the locker room for the showers. He hoped Remus would say something but the silence wasn’t broken.

One shower later Sirius packed up his gear and headed outside. After a quiet drive Sirius opened stepped inside his home. He tried to be as quiet as possible getting to his room but apparently he wasn’t quiet enough. He heard his father calling for him from his office. Sirius knew he had no choice as he slowly turned and headed for the office.

When Sirius gained his consciousness the first thing he registered was how much his head was pounding. The second thing was how his back ached. The third thing he registered was the bunch of little sniffs he was hearing. He felt how something tickled his nose.

Sirius opened his eyes to see a tiny black puppy with wet eyes on his bed with him. It was sniffing at him before it curled up next to his head. They looked at each other for a while before Sirius properly processed what he was seeing. He slowly raised his hand to pet the little ones head. The puppy let out a tiny whine and pushed against his hand.

After a few pets Sirius started to wonder how the puppy had gotten there. That startled him awake. He was sure that he had locked his door before he had passed out here.

He rushed to turn around to see the whole room and search for any danger. When he looked at the door it was still closed and locked. Wait. Can this puppy teleport or something?

In the soft glow of the desk lamp Sirius’s eyes landed on the boy sitting on his desk looking at him. He frowned. How did Remus get in here?

”If you are wondering how I got here, I climbed through your window. And no, no one saw me. It is already dark outside.” Remus said quietly.

Sirius coughed before answering. ”I see.”

Remus looked at Sirius face. Sirius knew that he propably looked bad. He could tell that he had at least a black eye and his lip was split. There might be other bruises but he wasn’t sure.

Remus got up from his place on the table and walked into Sirius’s bathroom. Sirius could hear the sink being turned on and a while later Remus emerged with a wet cloth in his hand. He sat next to Sirius, scooped up the puppy from his side and dumped it onto Sirius’s lap.

”It wants attention. Can you pet her?” Remus asked as he raised the cloth to wipe at Sirius’s lip. Sirius’s breath hitched at the contact but he still started to pet the little puppy on his lap.

They stayed quiet while Remus cleaned his face from blood. After he was done he got up to take the cloth back to the bathroom. Sirius concentrated on the puppy and holding it close.

”You don’t have to talk about it. You don’t have to lie to me, but remember that I am here.” Remus said quietly when he came back. Sirius lifted his gaze from the floor to see Remus looking at him.

”I- umm…” Sirius hadn’t talked about this before with anyone. He trusted Remus with his whole heart but he wasn’t sure if he wanted to bear Remus with the knowledge of it.

”I’m not sure if I can.” Sirius’s voice was shaky when he spoke.

Remus nodded understanding. ”You don’t have to. But if you change your mind I’ll be here. Always.”

”Thank you Remus.” Sirius scooted to lay against the wall with the puppy on his lap. It had gotten comfortable to Sirius’s presence by now so it was play-attacking his hand and whipping its tale around uncontrollably. He felt the bed dip with Remus weight as he got up to retrieve something from his jacket’s pocket.

While Remus wasn’t looking at him, Sirius let himself tear up a bit. He finally felt like the universe was paying back for all the shit it had given him over the years. He had finally found someone who cared about him, and who Sirius cared for as well. He hadn’t known this was something he needed but now that he had it he didn’t know how he had survived without it. Now he couldn’t help but dream about more.

Sirius quickly wiped his eyes as Remus sat next to him. He took the puppy from him but exchanged it with a little present.

Sirius’s eyes shot up. ”Happy birthday Sirius.” Remus said with a small smile.

”Oh, you didn’t have to get me anything.” Sirius answered little unsure of how to handle this situation. He hadn’t received gifts in years.

”I know but I wanted to. Now, go on. Open it.” Remus assured Sirius while holding eye contact.

Sirius whispered an okay and proceeded to carefully unwrap the present. He let out a wet laugh when he saw that the wrapping paper was hockey themed.

Inside the wrapping paper Sirius discovered three chocolate bars. One was regular, other one was dark chocolate and the third one was filled with mint chips. Sirius was tearing up again.

”I wasn’t sure what you liked but I thought, how wrong can I go with chocolate?” Remus laughed a little worried as Sirius didn’t say anything. ”These are from my favourite brand. If you like these, we’ll have to try their special winter edition. They change the formula every year, you know. I heard rumours that this year they’d do one with gingerbread.” Remus started rambling as Sirius still just stared at the chocolates.

”I- Thank you, Remus. This is the best present I have ever gotten.” Sirius glanced at Remus.

Remus flushed a little. ”Oh. Well good. Though I doubt this is the best one you’ve got-”

”Trust me. It is.” Sirius said and opened the regular chocolate bar. He broke off two pieces and handed one to Remus.

After they had eaten a couple pieces in silence Sirius opened his mouth looking at the puppy now asleep on Remus’s chest. ”So. I didn’t know you had gotten a puppy.”

Remus petted the puppy and smiled. ”This one actually isn’t our own. You know my parents are vets, right?” Sirius nodded. ”Well, now that we have fully adjusted to life here they have gotten back to their usual antics. When we lived in the States they used to bring sick animals and ones that needed to be fostered back home all the time. They had to take a brake from that hobby for a while but yesterday they brought this little guy home. He was found on the side of a highway abandoned.” At that Sirius frowned worriedly and Remus grabbed the puppy gently and laid it on Sirius chest. The puppy nuzzled contedly and fell back asleep.

”After I couldn’t reach you all day I decided to come check on you. When I got up to leave she woke up as well and wanted to come outside with me. I didn’t want her to wake the whole house up with her small barks so I just scooped her up and put her in my pocket for the walk.” Remus told him.

”My phone must have died. I’m sorry I didn’t contact you. I didn’t know you even wanted to reach me.” Sirius muttered.

Remus shook his head. ”If you think I the little argument we had after practice is enough to scare me away, you are very wrong. And stop apologizing. It’s not your fault.”

”I’m sorry, I’ll stop-” Sirius was quick to apologize.

”Sirius!”

”I’m sorry- NO, I mean okay. I’ll stop.” Sirius stammered.

Remus laughed a little. ”Okay. Good.”

They continued talking for about half an hour after that. They talked mostly about puppies to avoid any uncomfortable subjects. The clock was nearing 3 a.m.

Sirius yawned loudly.

”I think I should go. We should both propably get some sleep.” Remus yawned as well.

Sirius stretched under the covers. ”We propably should.” And threw his hand over his eyes.

Remus rose from his place where he was sitting on top of the covers. Sirius watched him walk over to his desk and put his jacket on. After that he reached inside his pocket where he pulled a dark brown beanie that he put on his head.

Remus turned around eyeing Sirius suspiciously. ”Where is the puppy?”

Sirius cracked a smile at that. ”I don’t know what you are talking about. I haven’t seen any puppies lately.”

Remus walked over to him and suspected his form beneath the covers. Sirius knew what he was looking for but he still blushed a little. Remus grabbed one corner of the blanket covering Sirius and yanked it off of him. Sirius quickly turned to cover the puppy sleeping near his side. Sirius started to laugh as Remus tried to reach the puppy but ended up tickling him. Remus smiled brightly at the sound but despite that he dove on top of Sirius to reach the puppy. He managed to grab her and turned with a wolfy grin towards Sirius. They both froze at that since their noses were almost touching each other.

”You found the puppy.” Sirius breathed out.

”That I did.” Remus said as he rose from the bed. He composed himself quickly before turning back towards Sirius who was pulling the covers back on. Remus held the puppy in front of Sirius’s face and smiled a little. ”Say bye. Now you’ll at least have a reason to start visiting.”

The corners of Sirius’s mouth lifted as he looked at the puppy. ”True. I’ll have to come see this little one.”

Remus slid the puppy into one of his coat’s inside pockets and walked up to the window. On the way he shut off the lamp leaving the room to be lighted up by the moon. He opened the window and raised one of his legs onto the other side.

Sirius took a breath in. ”Remus, thank you. For the chocolate. And for bringing the puppy.”

”It’s alright. I hoped you’d like them.” Remus said quietly. ”Good night. Text me when you wake up.” ”Good night.” Sirius whispered as Remus climbed out the window and slid it shut. Sirius burrowed deeper underneath the covers and let his eyes close. In the quiet darkness Sirius noticed how he could still smell the puppy and a slight tint of chocolate.

That night Sirius didn’t dream of pain and flying punches but of brown curls peaking out beneath a beanie and small puppies. When he woke up he wasn’t sure if last night was real but at the sight of chocolate on his desk he let out a relieved sigh.

Chocolate really is good no matter what time you are eating it. He thought as he munched on a piece while texting Remus.

#sweater weather lumosinlove #sweater weather #high school au #puppylove #wolfstar

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yunho-es · 4 years ago

Text

Member/s: Wooyoung (ATEEZ)

Genre: soft

Warnings: swear words

Words: 2043

Before reading, I want you to know that I don't use any names or Y/n's because I know many people don't really insert their names, they read it as Yin 😂 I also write in first person pov because I think it's easier to read and imagine yourself in that situation

Beads of sweat slowly rolled down my forehead as I pulled out a piece of paper from my sleeve. I knew that the exam would be hard, but I wasn't expecting it to be this detailed. Thank God my friend made me write it all on a small piece of paper. At least I will get a positive grade. Of course he made me do it, he passed the school with those. Thankfully, he didn't go to medicine school. If I ever ended up on his surgery table, I would die.

Three more minutes until the end and one more question unanswered. The teacher noticed me shifting in my seat, but she knew I always get good grades. She finally stopped looking at me and gave her attention to a group of boys trying to switch their papers. I glanced one more time at the piece of paper and put it back in my sleeve. Just as I finished the answer, the bell rang. Half of the class groaned, probably because they didn't manage to finish in time. I took my backpack and left the paper with my name on the main table.

"Good job! Honestly, your exams are always my favorite to grade. I'm really happy to have a student like you."

"Thank you, Mrs Johnson. See you on Monday."

Once I got outside I noticed the sky already getting dark. It was just 5 pm and winter was already doing it's job; the roads were wet and slippery from mixed rain and snow and it must've been under 0 Celsius. Usually I walk home because it's not far away, but my school uniform, rain and cold weather didn't go well together. I was just about to call my roommate when I felt car lights on me, followed by a familiar voice.

"I think quicker than you do." Wooyoung smiled as he opened the door. "Get in please I don't want to spend the next week taking care of an annoyingly picky roommate. I have plans to get drunk and do something stupid."

"You do stupid things anyway without drinking. So save the money and the time. And oh, save me from embarrassment." I get in the car sticking my tongue out at him. "Did you cook anything? I'm starving."

"No, of course. I slept the whole day." I look at him, hoping to see a smile on his face that would give me a sign that he's joking. "Don't look at me like that, I was tired from the night shift. I'll take you to McDonald's." he drove out of the school parking.

"I don't want trash, Wooyoung. I want food." I groaned. He told me that he would try cooking something, but it's been a week and he didn't do anything. "Please buy some pasta and tomato sauce I'll make something."

"Honestly, I really don't feel like waiting. And McDonald's is f**king awesome!" his hand reached out to turn on the radio. "How can you not love the little purple box full of 12 golden beauties?"

It did sound good, but we haven't eaten any "real" food for a month and my stomach started to ache. Living with Wooyoung has its bad and good sides, the bad sides mainly being his laziness and stubbornness. Speaking of stubbornness, of course he took the left turn towards McDonald's.

"What do you want?"

"What a polite way to ask me. You've loosened up I see." I frown at him. He rolls his eyes dramatically and turns towards me with his whole body.

"Your Highness, what do you wish to consume today?"

"That's just too much."

"What the h*ll do you want? I'm taking 3 burgers and fries and you aren't touching them." the brown haired boy points his finger towards my face. I squint my eyes at him, then bite his finger. "Crazy woman."

"Hello, may I take your order?"

"Hello, yes. I'd like a..."

***

"Is this place good enough for the Queen?" Wooyoung spoke with his mouth full of fries and ketchup. We sat on the roof of his car on a parking lot near a river. The place is good enough for the Queen.

"Eat before you speak, what's wrong with you?" I laugh at him, seeing that he spilled the ketchup on his t-shirt. "No girl will want you like this."

"To be honest I'm not interested right now." he replied immediately.

I'd lie if I said that my heart didn't sink a bit. Whoever said that boys and girls can't be friends was right. One side always catches feelings, big or small. In my case, I believe it's a small crush. He's the only boy I hang out with, so that must be why.

"Why?" I allow myself to ask.

"I had a little crush on a girl but I had to give it up." he kept stuffing his mouth with food, trying to avoid the conversation.

"And...?" I look at him expecting more. But he keeps his mouth shut and folds the paper of the burgers in his hands.

"Are you thirsty?" Wooyoung offers a can of soda, still looking at his fingers.

"Yes, thank you." he opens the can for me, first taking a sip himself, then giving the green beverage to me. I drink the whole can almost immediately.

"You could've said earlier that you were thirsty, I had water in the car." his tone visibly changed. He sounded more serious now, as if he just wanted to go home and lock himself in the room. "Want another one?" he reaches for another can.

"I think I have one more sip here." I throw my head back trying to drink every single drop of the refreshing juice. I slowly started to lean back, forgetting that I'm not in the chair but on the roof of the car. "Sh*t!" I curse as I almost fall on the rocky floor.

"Hey!" Wooyoung quickly reacts and grabs my hands, pulling me towards him. All the empty cans rolled down on the floor, making loud noises. "You good?" he asks, eyes on my face.

His hands felt so warm around mine. I really didn't want to let go. "I'm good." I pull away, trying to get down to collect the cans.

"Leave the d*mn cans there. You almost fell down. Do you see those rocks down there? What if you hit your head? What would I do?"

"I'd pay to get your car cleaned from my blood, Wooyoung." I laugh, but when I notice that his face didn't change, my smile drops. "What's wrong? Why isn't it funny when I say something like this?"

"Behind all these jokes you have to understand that you are very important to me and I have a soft spot for you. If anything happened to you my life would stop. I'm a serious man behind all my sarcastic jokes. Please watch yourself, because I can't do it all the time. It takes a second to turn a peaceful situation into a disaster."

I stare at him with my mouth a little open. I'm surprised at his words, I never heard him talk like this. I manage to say a sorry, turning my head away from him.

After a few seconds of silence, which seemed like hours, he got down and picked up all the cans, then offered me his hand. "Be careful." I put my hand in his, slowly getting down on the floor. "What dumbass even puts these rocks on the parking lot?" he picks up a few of them and pushes them away, leaving the bigger and heavier ones where they were.

"I think because they don't want someone else to have the spot." I watch as he tries to move a few more rocks. "Leave it, you're gonna hurt yourself. Let's just go back home, please?"

"Alright." he leaves the rocks and opens the door for me. Then he proceeds to enter the car himself. "But just for the record, I could've moved those rocks." his lips curved in a small smile. He can't help himself.

***

It suddenly became quiet in the house. Wooyoung layed on the sofa, watching the TV, and I sat on the floor behind the coffee table with my back leaning on the sofa.

"I'm a bit disappointed that we didn't take any photos." I pouted, scrolling down my Instagram feed. He didn't respond. I kept quiet for a few more minutes, then broke the silence again. "Do you think you could pick me up tomorrow from school again?" again, no answer.

I turn around towards him and see that his eyes are closed. He fell asleep while watching the TV. I took a blanket from my room and layed next to him under it. It's not my first time napping with him, but most of the time he refuses. He says that he is a kicker in his sleep and that he doesn't want to hurt me.

The sofa in our living room is quite small so I have to basically lay on Wooyoung. Just as I close my eyes, I feel his hand around my waist, bringing me even closer to him. Now my head was on his chest and I was surrounded by his scent and warmth. This must be what heaven feels like. Usually when we sleep like this together, it takes us a few hours to fall asleep. Mainly because he can't stop making jokes and I can't stop laughing. But this is different. It's calm. It's beautiful.

I couldn't tell if he was asleep or just pretending. He held me close and rubbed my back slowly. "Wooyoung?" I tried calling.

"Hm?" he responds sleepily.

"Are you okay?" I look up at him. His eye are still closed, but his fingers are still drawing tiny patterns on my waist and back.

"Mhm." again, I receive a short answer. When I try to move and give him some space so he can sleep peacefully, he opens his eyes to look at me. "Please don't move. I want to sleep like this." one of his hands moved my hair from both of our faces. "Please?" he asked, almost whispering.

I have never witnessed this side of Wooyoung. His voice was different, his movements were different, his eyes were different. This is the Wooyoung I wanted for myself, but couldn't have him. It took me a few longer seconds to realise that we are staring at each other, doing nothing but breathing quietly. Once his hot breath fell on my lips I couldn't help but close my eyes and sigh. Right now, I hoped for one thing to happen.

"Why can't I have you like this every day?" his soft voice whispered. I try to speak, but as soon as I move my lips, I feel something soft brushing against them. My breath stops and I force myself to open my eyes. He's looking down at my lips as if thinking if the next step is smart to do. I allow myself a moment of bravery and I put my hands on his chest, getting closer to him. "F**k it." he mutters, finally putting his hands on my cheeks and pressing his lips against mine.

His lips must've been the softest thing to exist on this planet. I tried to move, but my body was frozen. I couldn't do anything, just lay and enjoy the softness and the warmth of his lips. He pulled away for a second, trying to say something, but when he didn't succeed, he went back to the older position. Then, again, he pulls away.

"You are so sweet. You taste like I always imagined." the red cheeked boy whispers, brushing the tip of his nose against mine.

"More, please." I manage to say. My lips and throat are dry, my mind is going crazy, and my stomach is witnessing fireworks. Wooyoung smiles, still not letting go of my cheeks. "Please." I get impatient.

He leans in again, this time kissing me with more passion. It stopped being sweet and soft, now only one word existed in my mind: more. And he happily listened.

#ateez #wooyoung #mingi #hongjoong #san #atiny #kpop #kpop oneshots #ateez oneshot #ateez scenarios #jongho #yunho #seonghwa #yeosang #kpop fanfic #kpop requests #ateez imagines #ateez wooyoung #ateez fluff

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justonecitizenoftheearth · 4 years ago

Text

Destiel Secret Santa gift

Hej @notfunnydean ! This is your not-secret-anymore Santa from the @destielsecretsanta2020. I hope you like my story and merry Christmas!

Rating: T

Tags: case fic, fluff, even more fluff, a brief flicker of angst, Dean and Cas finally using their words, getting together for real, Sam is exasperated, Eileen is too

The Hunt before Christmas

Dean hummed a Christmas carol as he entered the kitchen. It was the 21st of December and the first year. The first year without a case, without an impending apocalypse, without grief weighing so heavy on his shoulders he thought he would suffocate. The first year to celebrate Christmas with his extended family. He smiled, gratefully and contentedly.

Sam sat at the table; a cup of coffee in one hand and the other on the keyboard of his laptop. Eileen stood behind him and had her arms wrapped around his neck. As Dean passed them by on his way to the coffee maker, he saw that they were browsing the same property agency´s site as the day before. Eileen pointed at a house and Sam clicked to read the details, both smiling softly and a little unbelieving.

Dean took a pan and started to make bacon and eggs, softly humming Metallica as he did so. When he turned around again, Cas stood beside Sam and signed a good morning to Eileen. A shiver ran through Dean as he saw the former angel so relaxed, in a T-Shirt and Sweatpants, a small smile on his face as he commented on the houses they were looking at. After he had pulled Castiel out of the empty, making him human in the process, he had told him that he loved him, too. He had pressed his lips to Cas´ in a desperate kiss and held him so tight he´d nearly crushed him. But after that, neither of them had known how to proceed. So, things had been awkward for a bit, neither knowing how to initiate another kiss or, god forbid, a conversation. They had continued mostly as before, maybe standing a bit closer to each other, hands brushing more often. Sometimes, when he felt brave, Dean pulled Castiel into a short hug when they were the last ones to go to bed after a movie night, or he´d ruffle his hair as he passed by in the morning. But Dean didn´t stay in range long enough for Cas to reciprocate, still too afraid of wanting too much, still too on edge about coming to terms with wanting Castiel to touch him. He stayed close, but not too close. With all the change happening, the pressure and purpose gone after god´s defeat, it was all he could handle.

Cas´ gaze met Dean´s across the room and the wrinkles at the corners of his eyes deepened as he smiled at him. Dean had to hold onto the counter as the realization that Castiel loved him back hit him again, overwhelming, and scary, and euphoric. He cleared his throat.

“Cas, can you tell Jack that breakfast is ready?”

“Of course, Dean.”

Dean´s eyes followed Castiel as he left the kitchen and avoided the half annoyed, half pitying look that Sam gave him. He turned around to get plates and glasses for orange juice.

***

The five of them were almost done with their breakfast as an alarm went off on Sam´s laptop. He frowned and scanned the page. His frown deepened and Dean set down his fork. He´d seen that expression a thousand times and a giddy, exited part of him made way for resignation. Some things would never change and getting rid of god would not rid the world of monsters. Maybe it was time to leave the actual hunting to someone else, but not quite yet.

“What´s up, Sammy?”

“Several cases of murders in Manitowoc, Wisconsin. Apparently, four people have disappeared on their way home from different festivities. Two have been found later, with severe wounds, but it´s not clear what caused these.”

“Hearts missing?”

“Don´t know, it´s not in the report.”

Dean sighed. “I´m gonna check it out.”

Sam closed his laptop, nodding. “We´ll leave in 15?”

“No, I´m going alone. You lot stay here and prepare the bunker for Christmas. If I don´t have a sock and a Christmas tree and eggnog and cookies ready when I come home, I´ll be your personal spirit of Christmas Yet to come and kick your ass.”

Sam grinned, but opened his mouth to argue. Cas was faster.

“I´ll come with you.”

Dean shuddered at the familiar words. The last time he´d heard them was the day he´d lost Cas to the empty. What if something happened? It seemed like an easy hunt, but what if something went wrong? He couldn´t lose Cas again, and now he was human and could get hurt or sick or ki…

“I think that´s a good idea.” Eileen seemed serious, but her eyes sparkled. “You can handle the hunt together and Sam, Jack and I will handle the Christmas decorations.”

Dean stared at her, then at Cas. “No, it´s fine, I can handle it alone, no big deal.”

“Dean, that´s bullshit. You two go on that hunt and be back in a few days, and if you can´t make it for Christmas, you won´t be alone. It´s a good plan, don´t be a jerk.”

“Who are you calling a jerk, bitch?”

Both brothers grinned at the familiarity of the bickering, then Dean turned towards Cas.

“You really want to come with me?”

Castiel rolled his eyes. “Yes, of course I do, Dean. I think I was pretty clear about that by now.”

Dean swallowed and nodded, ignoring that this was the closest they had come to actually talking about their, well, not-quite relationship.

“Well then, we leave in 30. Pack warm clothes, it´ll be cold in Wisconsin.”

***

“Did you not want me to come with you?”

Castiel´s blue eyes were so clear they seemed translucent, and Dean nearly drove them into a ditch as he lost himself in their openness yet again.

“Jesus, Cas. Of course I want you to come with me. I always do.”

Dean bit his tongue as the words slipped free. Awesome. Two hours into being alone with Cas and he already lost control over his mouth. This was going to be a long hunt. But the happy smile on Cas´ face when Dean dared to look at him again was totally worth it.

***

They arrived at the motel late at night. Slight snowfall and bitter cold greeted them as they left the car and Dean slipped on the icy ground as he made his way to the reception. Cas caught his arm and pulled him up again and for a second, they were so close that Dean stopped breathing. But Cas just smiled, asked if he was okay and took a step back when he was sure that Dean was steady again. He then walked up to the motel, his trench coat flapping behind him, snowflakes getting caught in his hair, and Dean could just stare dumbly, until a gust of wind reminded him that he was standing outside in the snowfall as well.

Dean hurried to catch up and they booked a room with two queens, at the far end of the motel. Dean went to get the bags while Cas went to check the room. They salted the windowsills and the threshold and Dean checked the news while Cas went to get dinner. While he was waiting, Dean checked the address of the next police department, the morgue and the names and addresses of the victim´s families. It was such a well-known routine that it calmed him a bit after the long drive and the constant flutter in his stomach that being close to Cas always caused.

Castiel returned and they shared pizza and beer while Dean explained their plan for the next day:

“We´ll get into our fed suits and check out the police department and the morgue. Also, we´ll check online and in the local bars if there are any parties planned tomorrow, if so, we´ll stay close and try to catch the thing, whatever it is, when it´s trying to attack again. We´ll salt and burn it, or behead it, or stab it, or whatever, and be home for Christmas.”

“Sounds like a plan.”

For a moment, they were both silent, munching on their pizza. But it was a comfortable silence and Dean relaxed into it. He heard the wind howling around the corners of the house and in the light of a lantern outside, he watched the snow fall. He smiled faintly. It could be worse.

“Do you like Christmas?” asked Cas.

Dean had to think about it and Castiel didn´t press, he just waited and scrolled a bit further on their news page.

Finally, Dean answered: “You know, we didn´t celebrate Christmas very often. When I was a kid, my dad wasn´t always there on Christmas. But the few times that we actually did celebrate were quite nice. When I was twelve, Sam gave me the necklace as a present. You know, the one that I gave to you when you”, he stopped there, suddenly remembering the purpose of the necklace.

“The one that can find god, I remember.” Cas just smiled; no tension suggested that the memory bothered him.

“Yeah, exactly, that one. Actually, that Christmas was pretty shitty, dad never showed up, I had to tell Sam the first bit about monsters being real, he was disappointed and cried the whole night before that… I actually stole a few presents, just so I had something to give to him, but they turned out to be girl stuff. He wasn´t happy.” Dean laughed and scratched his neck. “But I kept the necklace anyways.”

“I´m sorry it was like that. It wasn´t right, you two deserved someone to be there with you. You didn´t deserve the burden to be a parent to your brother.”

“Yeah, well”, Dean wanted to shrug it off, but again, his mouth had other plans. “I remember a bit of what Christmas was before, you know. Before our mom died. Nothing specific, just bits and pieces. A feeling of warmth and lights everywhere and just the general happiness that related to Christmas. I tried to give that to Sam later, but I was a kid and motel rooms aren´t made to be cozy and festive.” Dean gestured around him with a grin and Cas chuckled. Dean wanted to leave it at that, but again, he couldn´t.

“We had that one nice Christmas, even in a motel room. That was 2007, before… well, before I went to hell. Sam and I had a case and I wanted to celebrate, I mean, I thought it´d be the last time, you know. He didn´t want to at first, but in the end, we had a pretty decent evening. Eggnog and decorations and gifts and a game on TV. It was nice. Not as nice as Christmas with Mrs. Butters though.” Now both of them were laughing when they remembered the wood nymph, and the laughter left a warm feeling in Dean´s belly, that felt a little bit like Christmas, too. He grinned at Cas and the former angel grinned back, eyes sparkling and teeth showing, and Dean wanted to kiss him so badly it nearly hurt. But he didn´t dare to. But he lifted his hand and squeezed Cas´ shoulder before he leaned back and stretched his arms over his head.

“Let´s get ready for bed. Who knows how much sleep we´ll be able to catch tomorrow.” Castiel nodded, but as Dean got up to go to the bathroom to change, he caught his hand and held on. “This Christmas will be a nice one. And the next one, too. No more motel rooms or hunts or heartbreak. You still deserve that, Dean.” The hunter could only nod, the lump in his throat too big to talk.

Later, when they were lying in bed, Dean expected his thoughts to race and to keep him up for an eternity. But the sound of the calm, even breaths from the bed next to his lulled him to sleep faster than whisky had ever managed.

***

The police were very eager to help detectives “Hammet” and “Burton” and handed them the files without a second glance at their IDs. They also gave them the address to the morgue, where another helpful pathologist showed them to the victims and then left them to it. The monster obviously didn´t have a type, one of the victims was a woman in her forties who had come back from a working dinner that had taken longer and included more cocktails than expected. Another one was a seventeen-year-old boy who had come home from a LAN party in the early morning hours (there were obviously still people who did that). The other two had been a businessman who had been passing through this town and had spent his evening in the local bar, and a woman in her late twenties who had been born here and had been on a party at a friend´s house. They apparently had nothing in common except for the fact that they all had been at some kind of party before they died.

Dean checked their bodies and there were no hearts missing and the blood seemed to fit the wounds. There were bite marks, but it didn´t look like the attacker had killed them to eat the victims, there were no chunks of flesh missing. The teeth marks looked human, same size and same tooth marks. That was indeed strange, and he stayed silent, lost in his thoughts, while Cas and he ate lunch in the car. They turned up the heating and the radio and Castiel watched the people on the street, buying Christmas presents and decorations, sharing sweets, laughing and talking. Couples, parents with their kids and some people who roamed the streets alone, stopping every few steps to admire the shop windows. It was normal, and peaceful, and he suddenly felt a longing for a life like this, without the threat of injury and death looming over every job they took, without having to be ready to fight at all times, just the everyday worries of ordinary people. It was so strong he forgot to breathe for a second.

“Cas? Cas, are you okay?”

Castiel turned around and met Dean´s confused and worried eyes. His tone implied that he had been trying to get the former angel´s attention for some time.

“Yeah, I´m fine. I just … I just thought that it´d be nice to have a life like that.” Cas waved his hand in the general direction of the people outside the car. Then he huffed out a humorless laugh. “But I wouldn´t even know how that works. I don´t know anything besides … how to be a soldier. How to be violent. I don´t – “, Dean took his hand and cut short the self-deprecating monologue. “Cas, neither do I. But we will figure it out, okay? We´ll find something. Let´s just finish this job and then we´ll think about it.” Castiel just nodded mutely, his attention completely bound by “We will figure it out”, and Dean´s warm fingers wrapped around his own. Dean smiled and started the car, but after he pulled out of his parking spot, his hand found Cas´ again. Their fingers entwined, slowly, carefully, and Cas thought he could feel Dean´s racing pulse through his skin. But neither of them pulled away, their hands settled on the leather between them and when he glanced sideways, Cas saw that Dean smiled softly at the road ahead. Castiel leaned back and thought that he´d never been happier than here and now, driving down the snowy road, his thumb circling over Dean´s skin, the low hum of the Impala mixing with the sweet words of an Elvis song on the radio.

***

Questioning the relatives and colleagues of the victims didn´t provide them with any more leads on what kind of creature they had to deal with, or what the victims had in common, so they returned to the motel room and called Sam. The zoom call got accepted and they had a view of the war room. Fairy lights were wrapped around the handrail at the stairs and the columns in the room. Sam was breathing heavily, and he had fir needles in his hair, but his eyes were sparkling. “Hey guys, how´s it going? What are you up against?”

“Better question, what are you up against? And more importantly, will that fight with the forest spirits you´re apparently in finally make you cut your damn hair?”

Dean grinned and Sam rolled his eyes fondly. “No, jerk, I just carried the Christmas tree inside. You know, because someone threatened me with becoming the spirit of Christmas yet to come.”

Cas tilted his head, his forehead creased in worry. “But would you becoming a spirit not require you to die?”

Dean snorted. “Dude, no. It´s, uh, it´s a book reference. ´A Christmas Carol´. I thought Metatron uploaded all culture in your head?”

“Yeah, but my human brain can´t hold all of that information.”

“Oh. Yeah, I get that.” Dean rubbed his neck awkwardly. “I mean, it´s a movie, too, maybe we could watch it together?”

“Yes, I´d like that, Dean.”

They smiled at each other, until Sam cleared his throat and shook his head in exasperation. Dean filled him in on their case and the lack of specific details on the kind of monster they were up against. Sam thought about it for a while and asked more questions, but he didn´t come up with a clear answer either.

“I guess your best chance is to find out where the next party and/or festivity takes place and go from there. Take a little bit of everything; salt, iron, silver, holy water, maybe even dead man´s blood, and see what happens. I think you should be able to handle it. I´m gonna do some research, maybe I´ll find something.” Sam looked at someone behind the screen and signed: “Dean and Cas. I´m gonna explain later.”

Dean smiled softly. “Do some research if you want, but I think we´ve got it. Have a good time and say hello to Eileen and Jack.”

Sam nodded, but his smile faded. “Be careful.”

“Yeah, we will.” Dean grinned. “It´s not like I´m gonna throw myself on a rusty nail and really become the spirit of Christmas. And all those sons of bitches should know better than pissing me off.”

Sam snorted. “Sure, whatever.”

A moment before Sam ended the call, Jack entered the frame with his hands full of Christmas tree decorations and fairy lights wrapped around his shoulders.

“Sam, where do these g-“

Dean and Castiel chuckled at the black screen. Then Dean stretched and smiled softly at the snow that had started to fall outside the window again. “How about we find out where we can attend a party tonight and then we´ll actually watch ´A Christmas Carol´, whaddaya say?”

Cas smiled widely. “That sounds good.”

It didn´t take long to find out that there was a “Yule Party” at the bar in town, to celebrate the Winter Solstice. They didn´t need a ticket and could just show up, which gave them not much to do for the next few hours. Dean went and got pizza and some weird stuff named “Glögg”, which turned out to be pretty sweet, but good nonetheless.

Dean and Castiel settled on one bed and put the laptop up on the lower end. They had pizza and Glögg on their nightstands and were sitting so close that their shoulders and thighs were touching, but it was comfortable and familiar. The movie was up and when they finished eating, their hands inched closer. Dean´s heart was racing, a part of him wanted to draw back, but it had been so freeing to hold Cas´ hand in the car that he couldn´t make himself. Instead, he held his breath and took a leap again, wrapping his fingers around Castiel´s, who immediately relaxed. Dean closed his eyes for a moment and let out a long sigh, his attention bound by the warmth of Cas´ body beside him and his strong, solid hand in his. The former angel moved a bit up again, tensed, and then, as if he´d made up his mind, he let his head sink lower and laid it on Dean´s shoulder. A soft smile spread over the hunter´s face and he rested his cheek on top of Castiel´s head. His soft hair smelled of the shampoo that they shared and tickled a bit at his ear, but he didn´t move away and neither did Cas.

The movie played with low sound. the light was dim as it grew dark outside and the wind picked up again and threw snowflakes at the window. Castiel´s thumb drew soft patterns on Dean´s skin. It was heaven on earth.

Both of them dozed for a while, content in their warm bubble of happiness, but it got late and they still had a party to attend. With a sigh, Dean opened his eyes and looked down at their intertwined hands. Before he could chicken out, he pressed a lingering kiss on Cas´ head. Castiel´s grip tightened, and Dean heard his shuddering inhale, but he didn´t move for another few seconds. Finally, he murmured in the other man´s hair:

“We have to get up. We still have to go to this party.”

Cas voice was quiet as he answered: “I know. But I´d rather stay here with you.”

Dean lifted his head and Cas looked up. Dean got lost in these blue, clear eyes he´d spent so many hours daydreaming about.

“Yeah, me too.”

They held each other´s gaze for long seconds. Dean saw Castiel´s eyes widen in wonder at his words and then flicker down at his lips for a brief moment before they met his again. And suddenly, he didn´t know anymore why they had continued to dance around each other even after everything was already in the open. He loved Cas. And Cas loved him. And they both knew it. There was no reason to hide anymore. So Dean lifted Cas´ head with a hand and closed the distance between them, heart beating out of his chest. Castiel held his breath as their lips brushed against each other, soft as flower petals. The brief contact sent a shiver through Dean´s whole body. This wasn´t born of desperation as their last kiss. This was just made of love. And finally, their mouths locked together.

All air left Cas´ body in a long sigh as he finally felt Dean´s lips against his own. Their mouths started to move against each other, cautiously, but not rushed, not hurried. The first time that Dean´s tongue flicked against his lips, Castiel thought that his newly gained soul was about to leave his body. He arched towards Dean´s body and pulled his head close with one hand and kissed him at if he was drowning and Dean was his saving breath. Which he was. Dean groaned and pushed his tongue inside of Cas´ mouth and groaned again when the former angel started sucking on it. Suddenly, Cas was laying on his back, pressed into the mattress by the weight of Dean on top of him and Dean held himself up on one elbow and started to push Castiel´s sweatshirt up with the other one and suddenly they froze. Both men were breathing heavily, faces only inches apart, flushed, wide eyed, and neither had ever felt more alive.

“Now I really don´t want to go.”

Cas shuddered as he heard Dean´s voice so rough and low, desire obvious in his shaded eyes. He nearly said: “Then we won´t”, his whole body going hot as he imagined what would follow, but then the torn bodies of the victims flashed before his eyes. They couldn´t risk it.

“Neither do I. But ... lives are on the line.”

Dean sighed deeply. “I know. Let´s go.”

They got up, changed, and sorted out the weapons they were going to hide in their clothes. All the while, they shared glances, blushing and giddy. Cas had his hand already on the door handle when Dean gripped his hand and held him back.

“Cas, I”, the hunter bit his lip, but in the end, it was easier than he thought.

“I don´t want to hide anymore. I don´t want to pretend this didn´t happen. I – I want you. I want to be with you, for real.”

“Oh Dean.” Castiel turned to cup Dean´s cheek. “I wanted you since I pulled you out of hell. And I won´t stop wanting you, even when the last fiber of my being turns into dust and vanishes from this earth.”

He laid his forehead against the hunter´s. “I love you, Dean Winchester. And I want to be with you in every sense of the word.”

And it wasn´t harder than taking the first breath of fresh air after a long time underground when Dean answered. “I love you, too.”

It was Castiel who closed the distance between them and kissed Dean this time. Then he smiled more vibrant than Dean had ever seen.

“Let´s finish this hunt and go home.”

When they walked up to the Impala, they were holding hands.

***

The bar was full and loud and cheerful, and Dean enjoyed it more than he´d have thought. He held hands with Cas and ignored all dark looks about it. He drank three different kinds of beers and stopped then, before he got drunk. He played a round of pool just for the fun of it. He sat so close to Cas that their bodies touched and reveled in the glowing eyes and the easy smile of his – well, boyfriend.

They were sitting on the far end of the bar, with the wall in their back and the exit in sight. Cas´ fingers played with Dean´s and sent pleasant shivers down his spine. It reminded him a bit of the day they thought they´d die and he had taken Cas to that night club to get him laid. This night, he´d take Cas home. Well, he´d taken him home that night too, but now was different. Maybe they´d even sleep in the same bed. Maybe they´d… Cas´ voice interrupted Dean´s train of thought.

“Are you happy?”

The sentence took a moment to sink in, but then a broad smile spread on the hunter´s face. “Yeah. I really am.”

Cas squeezed his hand briefly. “I am too.”

For a moment they just looked at each other. Happy. Together. Finally. A nagging feeling filled Dean and he frowned. When were they ever allowed to be happy? The last time…

Castiel felt the change in mood. “What is it, Dean?”

“I don´t know, I”, Dean lowered his eyes. “I don´t want to lose this”, he whispered.

A gentle hand lifted his chin again. “You won´t. Everything will be fine.”

They held each other’s gaze, a thousand words said without a sound. But the mood in the room changed, a lot of people got up and were ready to go. Dean sighed and leaned back, only now realizing how close they had been. “The sooner we wrap this up, the sooner we´re out of here.”

Dean threw a bundle of dollars on the bar and they left, too. Outside the pub, they were met with icy wind. The snow scrunched under their feet. Dean shuddered and buried his hands in his jacket.

“Okay, what now? Should we go together or split up?”

“I think all of the victims have been alone, so it will probably be more effective if we split up.”

Dean nodded, swallowing the bad feeling he had. Cas was experienced. He´d fought more battles than Dean could even imagine. He´d be fine.

“Right. I´ll go down that alley, you go up towards the motel, we meet up there in three hours if nothing happens.”

Cas nodded briefly, but before he went, he pulled Dean close and kissed him once again, sweet and slow.

“See you later.”

Dean swallowed and blinked rapidly. When he´d regained his balance, Cas was already on the way. The hunter turned around, the feeling of Castiel´s lips still tingling on his.

It didn´t go smooth. It didn´t take long, either. Barely twenty minutes had passed when Dean heard a silent scream of terror in the distance, from the direction in which Cas had gone. It hadn´t been Cas´ voice, but the former angel would get there much sooner that he could and suddenly, his heart was in his throat. Dean took off, skittering over the snowy streets, smashing into walls, but he didn´t slow down. He heard a gunshot and some shouting only two streets away, running even faster, lungs burning, and stumbled around the corner just in time to see Cas getting thrown into a wall and sliding down. Unmoving. Lifeless.

For a second, the whole world stopped. Dean stared at the crumpled figure and a part of him laughed humorlessly. “I knew it. I won´t ever get to keep what I have. I destroy every good thing in my life,” whispered a voice from the darkest place in his mind. “No!” It took Dean a moment to realize he´d screamed the last word. This wasn´t supposed to happen! They were supposed to be happy; they were supposed to be free, they … Then his gaze turned towards the dark figure that had thrown Cas through the air like a rag doll. And his vision turned red.

He emptied his magazine into the body of the creature. It wailed, but still moved, so Dean took his silver and iron knifes and jumped into close combat. He sliced and stabbed and hit and kicked and he would rip this thing apart with his bare hands if he needed to, but it would curse the day it had taken Castiel away from him again. Dean didn´t feel the claws of the monster on his skin and the smell of the blood dripping from his face and he didn´t realize that his attacks were in vain. He just wanted it to suffer like he did.

Something wrapped their arms around his chest from behind and pulled him back. Dean panicked and tried to cut himself free, but then a very familiar voice shouted in his ear: “Dean, stop! This doesn´t work, stop!” Dean went slack and let himself be pulled away; all fight left him in an instant. He lived! Castiel lived! The creature hissed at him, glowing eyes staring at them for a moment before it vanished into the darkness.

Cas let go and spun Dean around, eyes skimming over his face and body to check for injuries. “Are you okay? Are you hurt?” Dean opened his mouth to answer and started crying.

Castiel wrapped him in a tight embrace and whispered wonderful, gentle words into his hair. Dean clung to him as if his life depended on it, sobbing into his neck and it took a long time before he realized that he repeated the words “you´re alive, you´re alive” again and again, and even then, it took a long time for him to stop. Slowly, his tears subsided and he felt slightly embarrassed, but not enough to let go. Castiel seemed to be happy to hold him. However, Dean started to feel his body tremble and his arms and chest burned. He drew back and winced. Castiel looked down at his arms and his eyes widened. “You are hurt!”

“It´s nothing. But you, I thought you – you weren´t moving and I” Dean hid his face in his hands. “Dammit, one might think I´d be used to this after a lifetime of hunting. Son of a bitch!”

Cas squeezed his shoulder. “It´s okay. It´s different now, I know. Please let us go back so I can take care of you.”

“But what about you? Are you okay?”

Castiel simply shrugged. “I´m a bit sore and my head hurts, but it´s not bleeding and I´ll be fine. I was mostly disoriented, and then you came and before I knew it, you tried to rip that thing to shreds with your bare hands.”

Dean blushed and looked down, but Castiel took his hand and he let his angel lead him home.

***

When they turned on the lights in the motel room, Castiel blanched. He helped Dean take of his torn, bloody jacket and ushered him into the bathroom. He sat Dean down on a chair and ignored all protests when he took a towel and the first aid kit and got to work.

Castiel wiped the blood from Dean´s face with gentle strokes and cleaned his wounds with careful hands. There were several long, deep gashes along Dean´s arms and some on his chest, too. Blood seeped out of them and Dean started to sway as the adrenaline subsided and the blood loss made itself known. Castiel´s eyes were bright with worry and he went out for a moment to snatch some water and a granola bar. He helped Dean lift the glass to his lips and take a bite, again ignoring the weak protest entirely, one steadying hand always on Dean´s shoulder.

“Do you want to lay down while I´m stitching these?”

“We´re gonna ruin the bedsheet.”

“I don´t care.”

“I don´t want to get up.”

Castiel took out the needle and the dental floss. “I´m sorry, I won´t be very good at it.”

“It´s okay.”

Dean closed his eyes and only hissed a few times when Castiel´s clumsy stiches pulled at his skin. Castiel apologized every time. When he was finished, he covered the sutures and wrapped the hunter´s arms and chest in gauze. Then, he leaned his head against Dean´s knee and stayed there.

Dean got dizzy when he looked down, so he kept his eyes closed, but started to pet Cas´ head with the hand that hurt less.

“Are you okay?”

“I don’t want to do this anymore.”

Dean tensed up and his eyes flew open, dizzyness be damned.

“What do you-“

“I don´t want to be scared to lose you all the time. I don´t want your blood on my hands and live in the constant fear of something coming and taking you away from me.”

Dean met Castiel´s eyes. They were shining in an astonishing shade of blue, wet with tears.

“I don´t want to hunt anymore. I will come with you, but I do –“

“Neither do I.”

They both stayed silent for a few seconds, the weight of the moment sinking in.

“I don´t know how else to live. But I want to try, because I´ve had enough, too. The world is saved, we are free, we´re no longer under Chuck´s control. Someone else can take care of the monsters now, there are enough hunters out there. Don´t get me wrong, I want to be in touch, I want to help. But I don´t want to fight on the front anymore. I´ve earned that. We´ve earned that.”

Castiel got up and took Dean´s face in his hands. There were still tears on his face, and the crow´s feet around the corners of his eyes wrinkled as he smiled. Dean had never seen him more ethereal, more angelic. More beautiful.

“Yes, we did. We did.”

Castiel helped Dean up and tried to steady him on his way to the bed without touching his wounds. He got another glass of water and the pain killers, swallowed two himself, made Dean swallow two and got out of his clothes. Dean still got dizzy when he looked down, so Cas took of his shoes and helped him out of his jeans. Dean was tempted to crack a joke about Cas finally undressing him, but the seriousness of the moment asked for silence. They lay down, both in one bed, without question, without talking, Cas behind Dean. He pressed his chest against Dean´s back, one arm under his head, the other wrapped around his waist, careful to avoid the covered injuries. Dean had thought he´d have trouble sleeping the first night in the same bed, but Cas´ closeness was incredibly calming and pulled him under before his brain could come up with even one reason why this was anything but good.

***

It took some time for Castiel to wake up. The first thing that he realized was the source of warmth before him and he pressed closer, a contended sigh on his lips. Hair tickled his nose and he rubbed it against soft skin. He dozed off again for some time, before the events of the night before caught up with him and he tensed. Slowly, Castiel opened his eyes. Deans head rested on his arm, which had gone a bit numb, but he could still feel the warm breaths ghost over his skin. Dean´s body rose and fell gently and suddenly, Cas felt like crying. Out of gratitude that he was allowed to be here and hold Dean in his arms. Out of sadness over the wasted time, over all the tragedy in their lives. Out of happiness. Out of love. He buried his nose in Dean´s neck again. His voice was raw with emotion when he whispered: “I love you so much, Dean Winchester.”

Dean tensed, but before Cas could say anything else, he answered: “I love you, too.”

Castiel let go so Dean could turn around and reveled in the sight of his sleepy eyes and tousled hair.

Dean smiled tiredly and caressed his cheek. “Did you sleep well? Does your head hurt?”

Castiel leaned into Dean´s hand and nearly forgot that he was supposed to answer a question.

“No. Well, it´s throbbing a little bit, but nothing that´d worry me. How are your injuries?”

Dean wanted to dismiss it, but he decided otherwise. “They sting. But I´m not worried either, doesn´t feel hot or infected or something.”

Castiel smiled, grateful for Dean´s honesty. With an insecure gaze, Dean leaned forward and hesitated, before he closed the distance between them and pressed his lips to Cas´ in an open-mouthed kiss. Cas melted under his mouth, body pressing closer and lips opening to let his tongue flick out. He was very careful to not put pressure on Dean´s injured chest and arms, but his hands were all over his face and back and Dean felt like floating, time and space and purpose just disappearing, until his whole world had reduced to this room and the warmth and scent of Castiel all around him.

It was a long time later when they pulled back to catch their breath, faces still so close together that they shared the same air. Dean thought he might explode from the magnitude of his feelings swiveling around just under his skin. When he opened his eyes again, the first thing he saw were Cas´ damp, red, parted lips and his heart jumped. Cas´ fingers played in his hair and he was so comfortable that he thought he might just fall back asleep, but his grumbling stomach obviously had other plans. Cas chuckled.

“Time for breakfast?”

Dean huffed. “Yeah. And a call with Sammy.”

“And some more painkillers.”

Dean didn´t argue. They got up and Cas got out to get coffee and breakfast while Dean struggled with his clothes, his injured arms hurting and stinging. With a curse, the hunter swallowed more pills and started his laptop. He dug through some of the databases, but nothing quite fit the profile of the monster. The date at the bottom of the screen seamed to double in size every time he dismissed an idea. The 23d of December. Two days until Christmas. If they didn´t manage to wrap this up soon, he´d have to stay here over the holidays with Cas. It would still be one of, if not the best Christmas of his life, but he´d been looking forward to celebrating with Sam, Jack and Eileen. And maybe visit Jody and the girls. The lock clicked and Dean´s hand flew instinctively towards his gun when Cas entered the room.

“Find something?”

Dean silently shook his head.

Castiel set the coffee and breakfast on the table and kissed the top of Dean´s head.

“We´ll make it for Christmas. Have you called Sam yet? Maybe he knows something?”

“Breakfast first.”

After indulging in coffee, sandwiches, some muffins and comfortable silence, Dean called Sam. It was Eileen who picked up.

“Hey Dean.”

“Hey Eileen. Is Sam around?”

“No, I´m gonna get – are you hurt?”

Her gaze swept over Dean´s gauze-covered arms and the bandages that peeked out from under his T-Shirt.

“Nah, it´s just a scratch.”

Dean´s eyes wandered over to Castiel, who threw Dean an incredulous look.

“What?”

“It´s not just a scratch, Dean.”

“I mean, I´ve had worse. Much worse.”

“That doesn´t mean that you should take this lightly.”

Eileen just grinned and went to the kitchen to get Sam. When they came back, Dean nearly threw himself off his chair with laughter. Sam wore an apron and wiped his hands with a kitchen towel, flour in his hair and dough on his forearms.

“Shut up, jerk!”

“No, forget it, bitch. I´m never gonna let you live this down. Man, you look like Mary Poppins!”

“Mary Poppins was a very wise and gentle…”

“Cas, I know. That doesn´t mean that I won´t tease my brother with it.”

Castiel held his gaze with a pointed look, until Sam cleared his throat.

“Guys, if you just called to insult me and bicker with each other, again, I´m going back to my cookies.”

Dean blushed and opened and closed his mouth a few times. Cas took over.

“We´ve encountered the monster and we can´t figure out what it is.”

Sam got serious immediately. “What happened?” Eileen tapped his shoulder and signed something. Sam´s jaw clenched, and his worried eyes turned towards Dean.

“You are hurt?”

Dean grumbled and waved his hand dismissively, which brought his gauze-wrapped arm into Sam´s sight and made him wince.

“It´s no- it´s not bad. A few gashes, nothing wild. Stop fretting.” He turned towards Cas. “Both of you.”

“Okay.” Sam and Dean stayed silent for a moment, a lifetime of shared trauma and injuries between them. Then Sam cleared his throat. “Okay, what happened?”

After listening to their story, minus certain parts that Dean and Cas kept to themselves, Sam rubbed his jaw, deep in thought.

“So, that thing attacks people who come home from celebrations at night. Nothing connecting the victims, human-shaped, not vocal, claws.” He stayed silent for a moment. “I have a hunch. I´m gonna call you later.”

They ended the call.

Dean sighed deeply and Castiel wrapped his arm around him. “What are we gonna do now?” Dean shrugged. “Hulu or Netflix?”

They were into the third episode of the Witcher when Sam called again.

“So get this. There is a creature in Norse mythology that fits your description. It´s called a draugr. It´s a kind of undead and it´s said that it attacks people who are making noise in the time around midwinter.”

“That fits! How do you kill it?”

“Well, it´s immune to most injuries, as you said. You have to behead it, lay it´s head at its ass and set it on fire.”

“We have to – lay it´s head at its ass? What the hell, man?”

“Look, I didn´t come up with that. Just do it, burn it. Or salt and burn it, won´t do any harm.”

Dean nodded. “Well, if we can get it tonight, we might make it for Christmas.”

“Yeah, burn that son of a bitch and come home.”

“Dean smiled softly. “Yeah, we´ll do that. See ya, Sammy.”

“Bye Dean, bye Cas.”

Both of them leaned back in their chairs as the call ended. For a moment, they were silent, then Dean covered his face with his hand and chuckled.

“Son of a bitch. A draugr. After defeating god, we failed to kill a goddamn zombie.”

Castiel laughed lightly. “Well, it failed to kill us, too, so I call that a tie. We´ll go and get it tonight and then we can go home to Sam, Eileen, and Jack. And celebrate Christmas.”

“Sounds good.”

Dean raised his arms to stretch the sore muscles and winced in pain. “Okay, so, it´s barely half past two, so what are we gonna do with the rest of the day? And will there be a party tonight that we can attend?”

It didn´t take long to find out that there was a Christmas-themed ball in the town hall. The tickets were already sold and there was a guest list.

“I don´t think we actually have to sneak in, we can wait outside until it´s late and people are leaving. Then we´ll go and get this bastard.”

“I agree, but with one condition.”

Dean lifted one eyebrow.

“We´ll not gonna split up again.” Castiel´s eyes were hard. “I won´t leave you to hunt on your own when you´re that hurt. We´re gonna stick together and I will fight. If something happens, you can still intervene. But I won´t leave you, no matter how much you´re gonna argue that you´re-“

“I wasn´t going to.”

Surprised, Castiel tilted his head.

“I would have suggested it myself. I think we´re better together. And I want to finish our last hunt together.”

Cas´ lip trembled and he gripped Dean´s hand tight. “Okay. Yeah. Our last hunt.”

None of them could tell who leaned in first, but suddenly their lips touched and then there was nothing else for a long time.

***

As it turned out, there was a small Christmas market in town. They took the car to town and wandered around aimlessly. The sun stood low and glittered on the snow. Dean and Cas looked at the goods that were laid out in the booths, choosing matching cups with printed moose for Sam and Eileen and a wood carving set for Jack. Night fell early and they got some mulled wine to warm them while they wandered around. Dean tasted every sweet food that he could get his hands on, until he felt slightly nauseous with all the sugar, but it was such a minor inconvenience that it was drowned out by the bliss of spending time with Castiel. They talked about the places they had visited, their favorite films and actors, which books they had read, and which bands Dean had seen live. Normal things. Everyday things. Dean could picture them living a domestic, calm, quiet life, just like this. He couldn´t wait.

In the end, they sat on a dock, looking out over Lake Michigan. They nursed their warm cups in one hand and Dean leaned his head on Cas shoulder. The reflections of the city lights and the half-moon glittered on the water. Dean sighed deeply and Castiel wrapped his arm around his shoulder. His voice was quiet when he asked:

“Are you happy?”

“Yeah. You?”

“Very.”

No more words were said. No more words were needed.

***

The ball was supposed to start at eight o´clock, so they returned to the car and parked it in sight of the town hall´s main entry. They shared a thermos with coffee and a blanket, huddling together against the cold. The radio played quietly in the background. For the most part they stayed silent, brief comments on the people entering the hall or about their plan the only conversations. When it got late, they left the car and lurked around the corner of the hall to be ready to go to work when the mood in the room changed and people left.

The music and chatter were audible, and they blew into their hands and stepping from one foot to the other to keep warm. Dean started to get tired and a bit cranky. The music had changed from lively rock and pop songs to something slower and cheesier and he was ready to complain when Castiel stretched out his hand. Dean stared at it blankly.

“Would you care to dance?”

“What? I can´t … Where did you learn to dance?”

Castiel shrugged. “I haven´t. But I´ve seen people do it and it doesn´t seem to be too hard. I don´t plan to dance a classic waltz, so, would you humor me?”

And he honest to goodness bowed down and offered his hand. Dean blushed and rolled his eyes, but he took Cas´ hand. The former angel smiled and pulled the hunter close. He wrapped his other hand around Dean´s middle and Dean placed his hand on Cas´ shoulder. They swayed to the sound of a slow, sweet song and Dean found himself immersed in the music and Cas´ touch and he closed his eyes. Castiel hummed along and they circled around with small steps. At some point, Dean leaned his head on Cas´ forehead and they stayed like that, dancing slowly and sharing the same breath, visible between their mouths.

“I love you.”

Dean felt Cas´ hand tighten around his. “I love you, too.”

They kept on dancing a while longer until the music genre changed again, indicating that people would either leave or stay until the early hours of the morning. Slowly, Dean pulled his hand from Cas´, kissing him chastely before he took a step back. He took a deep breath.

“I think it´s time.”

Castiel nodded. He pulled his machete and they set out to circle the streets around the town house.

In the end, it was fairly easy. They checked the dark streets, and kept an eye on several attendants of the party until they were home. It took no longer than an hour until they took a turn into a dark alley and were met with the sight of a tall figure with glowing eyes that growled at them, lifting clawed hands, and launching itself at them. Dean took a step back and Castiel charged with the elegance of a lifetime of practice. He dodged the draugr´s swing and beheaded it with a forceful swing of his machete. Afterwards, they stayed still for a moment. Dean´s heartbeat hadn´t even picked up that much.

“So, that´s that I guess.”

Cas looked at him with his head tilted, his bloodied weapon still in hand. “Our last hunt.”

Suddenly, Dean was scared. Hunting was familiar. Hunting was what he´d done for his whole life. Everything else had always felt like a farce, a charade, playing domestic because it was what he´d been supposed to do. He didn´t even realize how Cas came closer, to wrapped up in his epiphany.

“Hey, Dean, look at me. We´ll figure it out. And as you said, we can keep track and help other hunters. Not everything has to change.”

Dean nodded. “I know. We make it up as we go, huh?”

“Exactly.”

A deep breath forced its way out of Dean´s no longer constricted chest. “Okay. I´m gonna get the car. We burn that son of a bitch and tomorrow, we´ll head home.”

Dark smoke rose over the sizzling, burning body of the draugr. Dean held Castiel´s hand. They waited until only ashes remained. Then, they made their way to the impala, without haste. They had time.

***

Dean and Cas checked out of the motel at ten o´clock in the morning. They took turns driving, only pausing for gas and snacks. Castiel insisted on listening to a channel with Christmas carols when he drove, reminding Dean of the ancient rule he´d established himself:

“Driver picks the music, Dean.”

The hunter grumbled until “Driving home for Christmas” played on the radio. By the end of the day, even Castiel knew the lyrics by heart.

They held hands while driving and slept with their heads leaned against each other’s shoulders. When evening came, Dean cracked a joke about riding off into the sunset and they recalled their case in Dodge City. Castiel admitted how much he´d wanted to kiss Dean when he came back from the empty the first time. Dean admitted how long he´d been in love with Castiel.

When they parked the car in the garage, the clock jumped to midnight.

They smiled at each other and squeezed their hands once again before they left the car. Duffle bags over their shoulders, they entered the bunker and stopped in their tracks when they saw the library. There was a Christmas tree in the corner. Fairy lights everywhere. A sock for everyone hanging over the fireplace. A plate with cookies on the table, with a handwritten note from Sam: “Welcome home.”

Dean and Castiel took in the scenery. Then they turned towards each other. The lights around them glittered in their eyes.

“Merry Christmas, Cas.”

“Merry Christmas, Dean.”

#destiel secret santa #destiel #deancas #merry christmas

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corxunum · 3 years ago

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(for Izzie & Liv both) 01). Does your character like coffee better, or tea? 02). What sense do they most rely on? 03). Detail one secret shame your character feels. 04). What is their choice of weapon? How do they display affection? 05). What’s their view of lying? 06). If they knew they would die tomorrow, what would they do today? 07). what is their worst flaw and their greatest strength? 08). How emotionally stable is your character?

@wexarethewalkingxdead || Honesty time! [ accepting ]

1. Both are coffee drinkers, Izzie with a splash of milk, Liv prefers black.

2. Not so much a sense but Izzie relies on her gut instincts a lot. As nurse she´s encountered many people in her life in the most extreme personal circumstances, so she has developed a good grasp on others. Liv doesn´t like admitting it but she relies on her vision a lot. She can be pretty superficial and likes pretty things and people. Not so much as to possess them, but to look, maybe touch and flirt a little.

3. Izzie feels the most shame for leaving her family in Italy behind after her mother and brother died. She is conflicted between knowing she should have stayed and comforted, pick up the shambles, and her need to escape her grief. Her own selfishness often chews on her in quiet moments when in fact, it was only a survival move. Liv secretly feels shame for being so much like her mum who never stayed in one place too long, and thus, never was able to create lasting, meaningful bonds with other people. She knows she might overcome it if she only tried working on it, but the world is so big and there is so much opportunity… why would she, unless there was something, or someone, to make her want to stay for good.

4. In her main verse, Izzie has a baseball bat next to her bed. I like to think she´d use that in some sort of Walking Dead verse too (since this is what you and me are writing). Liv would use her fire powers in her Marvel verse, and in her human verse… hm, I´d go so far as to say she would avoid getting into conflict altogether, but I could see a handgun in a dystopian verse. She knows how to use one, thanks to her mum.

5. Izzie will tone down her bite and bark for once (altough she´ll still be bossy as hell I assume), and simply care for you. Stitch up wounds, cook for you, invite you over just to spend time. Once she´s past that stage, she will be very physically affectionate, touching, kissing, holding hands, just generally being close. Liv… that´s more complicated since she´s generally a huge flirt and can make people feel good or just seen by her smile or random touches, or just being friendly (most of the time in a coquettish way). If her feelings run deeper, she usually Is up and away, but if she isn´t, she´ll take you on her late night drives, shows you her photographs, talks about her family. Then, you know it´s serious.

6. Izzie is so bone-deep honest it´s not funny anymore. She´ll tell it how it is. That´s why she despises lying. In her job, she can be empathetic and formulate the truth a bit softer, but that´s about it. Liv on the other hand… a little lie hurt nobody, especially when it´s a lovely night, and the stars align. Or when someone comes too close and you need to make up excuses why you need to leave. A spoonful of sugar, right?

7. Izzie would fly back home, see her family a last time. If she had a SO at that time, take them with her. Liv would know she wouldn’t be able to find her mum at such short notice, so she would look for a nice, crowded bar, have a couple drinks, and go out with a bang.

8. Izzie is strong as hell. She does not allow herself to crumble, and pulls herself up at the bootstraps all the time. Downside: she can be too hard on herself and others because of that. Liv is a master at adapting because that´s what she´s been doing all her life. Emotions, real, honest emotions, come hard to her, and that´s why she might come across as shallow.

9. Izzie is a damn rock. Ride or die. Super stable. Her weak moments are rare and mostly lived through alone. Liv doesn´t really know stability, so she holds up best she can. PTSD, insomnia and her constantly changing life circumstances make her prone to instability.

#OOC [ mun ]#HEADCANONS [ Izzie ]#HEADCANONS [ Liv ]#[ OMG THANK YOU this was so thought provoking and fun to answer! ]#[ even if it´s been ages since you sent it in :/ ]

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rhubarbbaby · 4 years ago

Text

Strawberries and Art 5

Jihoon x Y/N

Genre: College AU, Fluff Word Count: 5k Summary: Like every passionate art student, you spent most of your time immersed in your drawings and paintings. The day you meet Jihoon, your everyday life suddenly gets a lot more exciting…

All chapters: 1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5

Chapter 5

When Jihoon was younger he didn´t think teachers existed outside of school. It wasn´t a conscious thought, he just never took into consideration that teachers didn´t cease to exist whenever the bell rang. It had seemed as if his teachers simply started to be around whenever he entered a classroom. And as he sat there in his music class, having given up paying attention a while ago, he realized that he thought about you in the exact same way. You had so suddenly entered his life, he was having a hard time accepting that you actually were a real living human being.

Jihoon had never been much of a romantic. He had always thought of romance as a construct made up by the entertainment industry. He didn´t think badly of it, he just doubted that the kind of romance they portray in movies and books even existed. He didn´t long for it either. He had always been a realist. Love would come, or it wouldn´t. And suddenly there were you. You were just there, like you had just started existing. And he didn´t know if it was love. He didn´t even think about the word “love”. He hadn´t even wrapped his head around the fact that he maybe, only maybe might have a teeny tiny little crush on you. He just knew that he liked you. Really liked you. Talking to you was so easy and made him feel so light, in the most perfect way possible.

At lunch Jihoon sat with Hansol, who had grown a bit annoyed with him being zoned out. “Dude. What´s going on? I´m bored. Talk to me.” “I´m sorry.” Jihoon grumbled not even looking up from his plate to look at his friend. “Didn´t the date go well yesterday?” Only now Jihoon´s eyes met Hansol´s. “No. It went perfect.” “So?” “What so?” “Why aren´t you super happy?” Jihoon let out a small sigh. “I am. I´m just confused.” “What? How can you be confused about a perfect date?” “I´ve only known her for a few days and I think I already like her. It doesn´t make sense.” Hansol let out a hearty laugh. “Hey, it does make sense. It makes a lot of sense actually…you know when I met Jo I knew she would annoy the shit out of me. And holy shit she does, I swear if she talks one more time about that superhero guy with that metal arm…Beefy Barnett or whatever he´s called…I´ll have to kill her.” Anyone would´ve been able to read the loving smile that had formed on Hansol´s face, as much as he pretended to be annoyed by Jo he just couldn´t hide his fondness. “Anyways the point I was trying to make is that I knew she would be a pain in the ass but I also knew I liked her. I´m not saying it´s always like that or it has to be like that but I´m saying that yes it does make sense.” “Bucky Barnes.” Jihoon grinned. “What?” “That superhero guy. His name is Bucky Barnes.” “Oh my god. Not you too.”

It had been nice seeing Jihoon in the morning, even if it had only been for about 2.5 seconds. And even if you probably wouldn’t have liked to admit it, those 2.5 seconds were the only reason you had survived your morning classes. And that really says something because you even skipped art history which you admittedly did feel sort of bad about. The professor was always so disappointed seeing only so few students sitting in her class. That´s why you normally tried not to miss her classes but you just haven´t been able to get yourself to move out of bed this early today.

You were on your way to the cafeteria when you realized it was Tuesday, which meant Jo didn´t have classes today. You groaned, knowing you would probably have to eat your lunch alone. You didn´t like eating alone in public. The exposedness of the situation, the feeling of being watched, yeah you could definitely pass on that one.

Jihoon´s eyes lit up when he saw you. You were standing next to the door that led to the cafeteria, the very same door he was about to walk through. As you looked down at your feet while letting some other students pass in front of him, he realized you hadn´t noticed him yet. “Hi.” He smiled. You looked up and for a tiny moment Jihoon thought he had seen your eyes sparkle when you recognized it was him. “Hi.” “You come here often?” Jihoon asked, his voice comically serious. “Oh my god,” you sighed. “That was really bad.” you weren´t able to hide the grin that had spread on your face. “I´m sorry I´m sorry,” he held up his hands defensively, also smiling, “anyways…are you my homework?” “What?” the look of confusion on your face was priceless. “You definitely look like my homework…cause I´m not doing you when I should.” He winked. Your eyes widened at the realization of what he had just said - god you really were so innocent- and then you laughed. “That was even worse, Jihoon!” “You´re mean.” He pouted. “Also you don´t even need those bad pickup lines.” You giggled. “Oh?” he raised his eyebrows, a smug grin plastered on his face. “I don´t?” Immediately your mind wandered off to yesterday when he had buried his face in your pussy, giving you all those sickeningly sweet jolts of pleasure. “No. I don´t think you need those.” “And why is that, sweetie?” Your face had turned bright pink and you didn´t know what to answer. Why the fuck did he always have to tease you?? Your entire body had been filled with intrusive warmth and for a few seconds you were physically unable to say anything. You just felt so small under his gaze, his presence was overwhelming. “I mean…I already gave you a drawing of a hedgehog…that basically bonds us for life.” You stuttered. “Does it now?” Jihoon let out a hearty laugh “You really are so innocent aren´t you?” “I´m not innocent at all!” you tried to seem offended. “You sure?” “Yes!” Raising his eyebrows again he responded: “Guess I´ll just have to find out huh?” When he saw you were getting flustered again he had mercy and changed the topic “No but seriously, thanks for the drawing. I know it’s simple but it‘s the most adorable thing. I love it.” “I‘m glad you like it.” You smiled softly. “Of course. Also you drawing that for me is one of the cutest things…”He didn‘t get to finish the sentence he had started because you had grabbed his jacket and had pulled him so that he was now standing in front of you, your back facing the wall. “Oh my god. I´m sorry but you have to hide me real quick.” Jihoon didn´t know what was going on but he could see the freaked out look on your face, so he leaned in closer as to shield you. “I‘m so so sorry.” You let out a breathy giggle, still holding him by his jacket. “But behind you my art history professor just passed and I skipped her class today and I really didn´t want her to see me and I panicked and…” you let go of his jacket. “I´m sorry.”

Jihoon didn´t say anything for a moment, he was still processing what had just happened. But then a huge grin spread on his face. “You know, if you really wanted to be closer to me this bad you could´ve just asked.” “I swear it really was because of my professor.” You said trying to get yourself out of this awkward situation. Your heart was beating so so so fast. “So you don´t even wanna be close to me?” he asked and only now you realized how small the distance still was between your bodies. He was standing so close you could´ve counted all of his eyelashes. “I..that´s not what I meant.” You averted your gaze to the floor, not being able to keep looking into his eyes. “Look at me.” Surprised by his words you pulled up your view again. “You’re cute.“ Your cheeks flushed red and your mouth slightly agape you looked at him. He was smirking at you, knowing oh so well what effect he had on you. “And you’re mean.” You finally replied. He raised his eyebrows, grin still plastered on his face. “Mean? That’s not exactly what I would call a person who made me cum just yesterday.” “I…” Jihoon couldn’t help but laugh at your shocked face. “You sure you aren’t innocent, sweetie?” “I…” you buried your face in your hands “You really can’t stop teasing me, can you?” you finally muttered under your breath, voice way too quiet to sound confident.

And then Jihoon took your face in his hand, his thumb caressing your cheek lightly. “Can you blame me? You really look so pretty when you blush.” He was smiling but his voice sounded so serious. “Haven’t we had this talk already?”, you giggled. “We most definitely have.” “Jihoon, you’re horrible.” “Y\N, you’re wonderful.” “You’re cheesy.” “You’re pretty.” “You need to stop.” You grinned. “And you need to accompany me to that party the music institute is having tomorrow.” “What’s in it for me?” You crossed your arms over your chest and acted as if you were actually thinking about saying no. “I’ll buy you a drink and you’ll get to spend some quality time with me, your local handsome music student who apparently is really good at eating pussy or so I’ve heard…” You slowly shook your head at his boldness, the smile never having left your face. “I’d absolutely love that.” You said. “I know.” He winked. “I’ll text you the details later. I’m already late to class.” “Oh my god, sorry I didn’t know you had class.” He smiled and then he leaned in and gave you a soft kiss on the cheek. “Being late for class because of a pretty girl? Totally worth it.” He smiled. “See you tomorrow!”

You hadn‘t managed to fully comprehend that you would be going to a party with Jihoon the next day, not until you got home in the afternoon and sank down onto your sofa. A smile spread itself across your face when you thought of how he had sounded so genuinely hopeful that you would say yes. You were so incredibly attracted to him, in definitely more ways than one, you hadn‘t even thought of saying no. You would‘t call yourself especially insecure or self conscious but you couldn‘t deny having some trouble realizing that this unearthly being of a man was actually attracted to you. It didn‘t make sense, he was this beautiful, funny, (too) cocky, sexy person and you were normal. But he hadn‘t been sure. He had been hopeful. So there were only two options; either he was just as captivated by you as you were by him, or he just didn‘t have a clue of how attractive he actually was (very unlikely because: cockytm).

Jihoon: hI Jihoon: *ho Jihoon: shit! lol Jihoon: Good afternoon. Jihoon: I actually wanted to message you earlier but I only got around to it now. Sorry :( So about that party tomorrow… You: Hii. Very smooth start to a conversation I must say.

He must have seen that you had already messaged back because for a second the typing... on the top of your chat turned into online.

Jihoon: I tried 😫 You: I can see. Lol Jihoon: You‘re making fun of me :( You: Maybe. Jihoon: you‘re gonna regret that. Jihoon: :) Jihoon: so anyways…about that party tomorrow… Jihoon: I can come pick you up at 7 if that‘s ok for you? You: sounds good! You: Do I have to wear something fancy? What party is this?? Jihoon: No you don‘t have to. It‘s just some annual party the music majors organize every year in honor of some famous composer. Jihoon: Don‘t ask me who the composer is. I forgot. You: omg 😂 Jihoon: 🙄 Jihoon: So 7 is good? You: Yup.

It took you a bit of courage to send the next message.

You: Can‘t wait to see you again Jihoon: Goes both ways sweetie ;)

And then you were clinging to your phone like it was some incredibly valuable treasure (or a certain other person). You really could not wait.

Jo: Y/N!?!!?!??!??!?? Jo: You‘re coming to the party tomorrow??? Jo: Hansol told me Jihoon is taking you 🌚 You: 😳 You: He told Hansol about it… You: omg You: but yes I‘m coming…I guess you‘ll be there too. Jo: YES BITCG Jo: and of course he told Hansol about it. He‘s in love with you 😌 You: JO Jo: How was your lunch date yesterday? You: … Jo: Oh no was it bad? You: NO omg it was great Jo: oh Jo: OH 🌚 You: stop sending that emoji 😭 You: but yeah uhm we kissed and Jo: AND You: and then he kinda maybe gave me head on my kitchen table. Jo: you’re kidding You: I swear! Jo: He’s in love with you!!!!!!!! Jo: Also was it good? You: sooo good You: stop saying that I don’t even know what I’m feeling myself :( Jo: You don’t have to know yet tho. Just enjoy it. Jo: And I can’t wait to see you two together tomorrow. I bet y’all are adorable You: omg pls don’t make it weird LOL Jo: Let me rephrase that Jo: I am very looking forward to creepily stare at the two of you from across the room 🌚 You: omg

The next day you handed in your portrait assignment. You had put it in a green folder with your name neatly written on top. You were really happy with your end product and you most definitely didn’t regret having chosen Jihoon as your model. As your professor took the folder out of your hand she smiled: “You know whenever I see that folder of yours I always know it’s gonna be something good.“ “I…thank you so much. That means a lot.“ You stammered. With a friendly nod she averted her attention back to another student. And it was so weird, so utterly confusing that the first thing you thought of on your way home was how you couldn‘t wait to tell Jihoon about your encounter. How you couldn‘t wait to tell him how happy that had made you.

After having spent most of your afternoon on school work, you had forced yourself to quickly decide on an outfit you wanted to wear for tonight. You hated the idea of spending so much time just thinking about your clothes. You had chosen a skirt and a top you really liked, nothing special but you felt comfortable in it. You looked pretty but not as if you had spent much thought on how to do that (which you considered a big accomplishment). It was a few minutes before seven when you heard your phone buzz.

Jihoon: Heyy I’m outside :) You: I’ll be down in a sec!

He was standing on the sidewalk and he looked so casual so at ease, as if picking you up was something he did everyday. And fuck he looked hot. When he saw you walk out the door a puppy like smile spread across his face that broke the illusion of casualness. You couldn‘t help but reciprocate his exciting grin. Without hesitation you fell into each others arms. “Hi.“ he murmured against your hair while holding you. “Hi.“ “You know I’m really happy to see you again.“ “Goes both ways.“ You grinned which made him snicker. You slightly pulled yourself out of his embrace, you didn‘t want to wait any longer. You had been waiting the entire day to tell him. “You know I handed in my portrait assignment today.“ “And?“ he looked so excited. His eyes had actually lit up. “She hasn’t graded it yet but she said that she’s always happy seeing my folder because apparently it’s always good and I still can’t believe she actually said that.“ And then he laughed and there was no other thing to do for you other than to blush. You just stared at him in disbelief because what the hell was so funny. “I…I just…sorry but like of course she said that.“ he was still laughing “Y/N, I really don’t know much about art but even I, a fool, can see that you’re so fucking talented.“ You smiled “You really are a fool, Jihoon.“ “I compliment you and that’s your comment? I can’t believe it.“ He dramatically put his hand over his chest. “I had literally no other choice.“ You giggled. “But thank you so much.“

As you were walking he told you of his day and how he had been writing a lot of songs lately. You were a rather introverted person, talking to someone, even being around other people could be very exhausting for you. You liked being alone, not necessarily because there were no other people around but because you didn’t need to explain yourself. It wasn’t that you thought you were so different or oh so special but you just had always felt a certain disconnect between the thoughts and feelings you wanted to express and what actually ended up coming out of your mouth…which could be exhausting. But then there were people who seemingly were able to pick up what you were trying to convey. Not just the general message of your words but all those tiny little nuances that you had always been hiding unintentionally in your language. Jihoon seemed to be one of those people. Your conversation was not just question-answer-and saying things that were supposed to be said. It felt like you were having a monologue together. Your thoughts somehow intertwined, flowed into each other at the exact right time in the exact right places and that was just so fucking cool.

“Hey would it be ok if I held your hand?“ You giggled and turned your head to look at him. “Jihoon, you don‘t even have to ask.“ He took your slightly smaller hand into his and immediately interlaced your fingers. “I just wanted to ask because people are gonna see and they‘ll probably assume we‘re a couple and I don‘t want that to make you uncomfortable.“ You gave his hand a tight squeeze and smiled. “It won‘t.“

Jihoon had told you that they had rented the small concert hall for the party. When you got closer to the music building there were already a lot of (presumingly) students around. The doors to the hall were open and a lot of people were hanging out on the lawn in front of it. You had to stop yourself from laughing out loud when you watched a boy, who definitely wasn‘t 18 yet, throw up into a bush. It was only half past 7. “Poor kid.“ Jihoon stated without being able to hide the amusement in his voice. “You ever threw up before 8?“ you snickered. Your question was meant to be rhetorical. “I would like to exercise my right to remain silent.“ “Oh. My. God. You actually did.“ to accentuate your reaction you stopped walking and put your hands over your face. Mostly because you had a hard time hiding your laugh. You were standing at the edge of the lawn, still at a safe distance from the other party guests. “I didn‘t say anything!“ “I‘m shocked.“ “I know it‘s hard to imagine but there used to be a time where I was so nervous about talking to girls that I had to drink a lot and I mean A LOT of alcohol before doing so.“ he stated, a grin plastered on his face. “Awww Jihoon was actually scared of talking to girls.“ He let out a low chuckle and then he grabbed your hips roughly and pulled you into him. “I‘m not scared of talking to you right now though, am I?“ And holy fuck if that didn‘t make you nervous nothing else would but for some inexplicable reason you still managed to stutter out a response. “Maybe you‘re just good at hiding it.“ He looked at you, amusement still written on his face and it was so hard not to look away because his stare was so intense so intimate, you didn‘t know what to do with yourself. “God, you‘re killing me.“ You just smiled, too much in trance to say anything. His eyes wandered down to your mouth and only now were you realizing how you had been subconsciously biting your bottom lip. And fuck you were already waiting for the kiss, you swore you could already feel his lips on yours but… it didn‘t happen. Instead he pulled away slightly, leaving his hands on your hips. “You know, maybe you‘re right.“ he said and for a moment he seemed so incredibly vulnerable. “Huh?“ “Maybe, you do make me really nervous too.“ And then there was nothing left to do. Everything had stopped moving and there was nothing left to do. Nothing, except that one thing. And you really had no other choice because there was nothing. Only him and you. And then you took his face into your hands and kissed him. He returned it immediately, it was a soft, loving kiss, maybe even a bit innocent. “I‘m glad I can make you feel that way too.“ You released yourself from his grip and took a few steps backwards away from him. “Come on, let‘s join the others.“

There are several ways and techniques on how to draw attention to yourself. The classiest way, which would also have the benefit of not disturbing other people, would probably be to simply just wave in the direction of the person you wanted to get attention from. Jo however was not a classy person. “Hey! Y/N!“ Jo was literally jumping up and down while waving her arms. Hansol, who stood next to her, started to laugh and shake his head in disbelief. But one had to hand it to her, her method worked. You had immediately spotted her through the crowd. Jihoon turned his head to look at you, his voice oozing with sarcasm “I’m not sure but I think your friend might be looking for you.“ “I think you might me right.“ you giggled.

“I‘m so happy you are here!“ Jo stated before hugging you and Jihoon. “I agree. This one‘s kinda hard to deal with alone.“ Hansol said, pointing to Jo. Jo let out an overdramatic sigh and crossed her arms over her chest. “You‘re the worst.“ “I know.“ Hansol had pulled her into him and had given her a kiss on the top of her head, she scrunched up her nose in fake protest which in return had made Jihoon and you laugh. “I swear I have no clue how you deal with her on a daily basis. She is such a goblin.“ you said after having watched the scenario. “Finally someone who understands me!“ Hansol raised his arm to give you a high five, which you gladly reciprocated. “I really need some alcohol after this betrayal..“ Jo announced with a grin on her face.

You had expected to see more dancing, more drinking and more people getting fucked up but right now you were looking at a room full of students who were seemingly just chilling. Most of the chairs had been pushed to the side and a lot of people simply just sat on the floor, chatting with each other. Some students were dancing while some were standing next to the bluetooth speaker. They were probably arguing over the choice of music. The four of you were standing next to the bar which really wasn‘t a bar. To be precise the so called bar consisted of one folding table and a lot of bottles of alcohol that were stacked on the floor. Jihoon was standing next to you, your sides had been touching the entire time. It felt good to be close to him in such a casual way even though it did make you nervous. “That’s too much orange juice!“ Jihoon tried to keep Hansol from pouring more of the juice into his cup. “Dude it‘s gonna taste like shit.“ “It‘s literally just gonna taste like alcohol.“ “Yeah! Which tastes like shit!“ “Oh my god you have the taste buds of a baby.“ “Yeah he does.“ Jo chimed in which earned her an offended look from Hansol. “Ok but Hansol is kinda right. Like alcohol really tastes awful.“ you decided to defend Hansol. “You‘re cute.“ You hadn‘t even realized yet that Jihoon‘s compliment had been meant for you when Hansol started to protest. “So when Y/N says alcohol is disgusting it‘s cute but when I do it I have the taste buds of a baby??“ “Nah you both have the taste buds of a baby but Y/N is just cuter than you.“ Jihoon grinned and grabbed you side to pull you into him. You thought you were losing your mind. The concept of Jihoon complimenting you was already a hard enough concept to grasp but now he was doing it in front of your friends? You were sure he would be the death of you sooner or later. “I‘m outraged.“ Hansol let out a laugh. He looked like he couldn‘t believe Jihoon‘s boldness either. “Aww poor baby. You‘re cute too.“ Jo had pulled Hansol‘s face down to her height to give him a kiss on the nose. “Thank you.“ he pouted.

“Hey Jihoon! Hansol!“ “Hi! I didn‘t know you were coming too, Seokmin!“ Jo greeted the taller one of the two guys who had just approached you. You didn‘t know them but you were sure you had seen them somewhere on campus before. “Me neither to be honest. But Seungkwan right here didn‘t want to go alone.“ You looked at Seokmin. He was a tall guy who, for a second had seemed somewhat serious and intimidating, but when his entire face broke into a beaming smile that illusion was quickly eliminated. He had actually turned into an overgrown puppy. After everyone had greeted each other Seokmin introduced his friend: “Seungkwan, that‘s Jo and this is…I‘m sorry I think we haven‘t met before. You‘re not a music student right?“ he was looking at you now. “No I‘m an art student. I‘m Y/N.“ “Very nice to meet you.“ the guy who was apparently named Seungkwan chimed in. At a first glance Seungkwan had appeared to be very average looking, only now as you were actually looking at him were you realizing how pretty he actually was. He looked like an actual disney prince. “Seungkwan, how have you been? Haven‘t seen you in so long.“ Jihoon had turned his head to Seungkwan. “Yeah I’ve been real busy with school but besides that I’m doing pretty well.“ The two of them fell into a casual conversation about their school work and you thought Seungkwan was mentioning something about a new project but you couldn‘t be entirely sure because your thoughts had drifted off after about 10 seconds into the conversation, which was of course no one‘s but Jihoon‘s fault. His hand was still resting on your waist as if it were the easiest, most casual, thing to do. Bystanders probably didn‘t even notice but you clearly felt his hand rest on your hip a tad bit too firmly for it to be normal. You were so so so close to him. Your shirt had risen up just a tiny bit so his fingers were resting on your bare skin. You were already so hyperaware of his touch on your body you really thought you were losing your mind when he started to rub small circles into your side. You wanted nothing more than to be closer to him but you were already so so close and you were in public and he was literally having a conversation with someone right in front of your eyes. “Are you down for it too, Y/N?“ Seungkwan had mentioned your name. Oh no. You had no clue what he was talking about. “I‘m sorry, what did you say?“ you tried to save yourself. “We were talking about playing Seokmin‘s drinking game…“ “Yeah of course she‘s down for it.We’ll just get something to drink and then we’ll join you.“ Jihoon interrupted him. “Awesome!“ Seungkwan didn’t seem to question your lack of response. As Seungkwan was walking off to join Seokmin, Hansol and Jo for the ominous game you were about to play, Jihoon pulled you to the side. “Was I that much of a distraction to you sweetie?“ he was actually smirking. “I…“ you didn’t know what to say because fuck yes he had been that much of a distraction but you couldn’t just admit that even if you were aware that he already knew. “I didn‘t even do much.“ You were nervous again. You could feel your heart pounding in your chest and your entire body felt so hot. “You‘re just mean.“ you pouted. He let out a hearty laugh at your childish answer. “And you‘re just so innocent.“ “I‘m not.“ “You keep saying that but I just don‘t believe you, sweetie.“ He still had his hand on your hip and it felt like your skin was actually burning under his touch. You really didn‘t think you were brave enough but for some unapparent reason you managed to get your next words out of your mouth. “How can I prove it to you?“ He was surprised by your question, he had raised his eyebrows but his smirk had vanished a tiny bit. “Hey are y’all coming?“ Hansol’s voice had made both of you jump slightly. Jihoon slackened his grip on your waist and took a step back to lessen the tension between you. “We‘re on our way!“

“What even are we playing?“ you asked Jihoon as you were walking over. “If you would’ve paid attention you would know.“ he winked at you. You just rolled your eyes which made him chuckle. “It’s just some weird drinking game Seungkwan wanted to try for the longest of time. Apparently it’s a bit like truth or dare.“ “Oh, that sounds like fun.“ “It does. Maybe it‘s a chance for you to prove that you‘re not that innocent?“

Hi! It´s me, Jo. I´d like to thank you for reading my stuff! I really hope you enjoyed it. If you have any feedback, comments, requests, questions please let me know!

Also I’m very sorry it took me so much longer to upload a new chapter than I originally thought. University has been more stressful than I predicted :( Oh and if you’d like to be added to the tag list just let me know :)

Tag list: @3sriracha

#Jihoon x reader #woozi x reader #seventeen x reader #seventeen ff #seventeen #seventeen fluff #jihoon fluff #woozi fluff #kpop fanfiction #kpop ff #rhubarbbabywrites

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idkthisisjustforfanfic · 5 years ago

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U N P L A N N E D, part six

When you came home late from work on Tuesday afternoon, the last thing you expected to find was Harry sitting on your front step. It seemed unsafe, really. Jeff and Dave would kill him if they found out that he was just waiting, in broad daylight, by the front door of the stranger he’d knocked up.

It was a quiet enough neighborhood. Young families and professionals lined the block and occasionally would get together for a barbeque or a summer celebration. But that didn’t mean they weren’t nosey.

“Hi, sorry to just show up,” he stood when you got to the end of the walkway, fishing for your keys in your bag when he shoved his hands in his pockets. “I uh--Dave called, the results are in.”

You froze at that, a wave of heat brought beads of sweat to your forehead. You tried to swallow the anxiety--why should you be nervous? There was no other option.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah--s’me, obviously. He said the test was conclusive and I am definitely the father.” He let out an awkward laugh, lifted his hand to scratch the back of his neck.

You sighed, nodding for a second. You wondered if he was mad--if his heart sank when he heard it or if he suddenly wanted to disappear, flee the country and write you a fat check to leave him be.

“I knew you were telling the truth, but--it’s good. Now we don’t have to worry about that anymore.”

Or maybe not.

“Yeah,” you plucked the house key from your ring, stepped around him to unlock the door. “That’s good. We can just move forward now.”

He nodded, stepped in behind you. He let the door swing shut, a cool reprieve from the June heat.

“Was Dave mad?”

“No--he didn’t call you?”

“I haven’t checked,” you put your work bag down on the floor. Your phone was buried inside, you’d opted for the radio on the way home, a welcome distraction from an anxiety provoking email from Levi at the end of the day.

Let’s have lunch tomorrow. Want to catch you up on a few things and touch base!

“He just said we should think about some logistics.” He leaned on the counter, watched as you thumbed through some mail Lexi had left out. She often got home before you from work--the sound of the shower from behind the bathroom door was a give away.

“Logistics?”

“Yeah--some more custody stuff, more financial agreements. Living situation.”

No good mail. You tossed most of it in the garbage, let the electricity bill flutter back down to the counter. “Living situation? What about it?”

“I mean--if I’m on the road, would you come with me? How do we work out custody when I’m out of the States, that kind of thing.”

You were almost nine weeks pregnant. The conversation felt more like a topic for nine months. He could tell he’d ignited a nervousness in you, licked his lips awkwardly. You shook your head and tried to put together words. “I don’t know how we figure that out--I mean, that’s so far away and we might change our minds about how to do things once, you know, we’re actually parents.”

“Right, no, I know. Just some stuff to think about, but, it’s fine. I was just in the neighborhood and figured you’d be getting home soon. Do you want to get dinner or something?”

“It’s Tuesday.”

“It is.”

“I have take out with Glenne and Lexi every Tuesday. Unless one of us fucks something up and has to stay late at work. Which I did--but, Glenne will probably be here soon.”

He laughed at that, nodded before he shoved his hands in his pockets. “Got it. I should go, then.”

His words felt urgent--was Glenne not supposed to know he was here? Were you supposed to be keeping more things a secret than just the impending life changer growing inside of you?

For a second, you wanted him to stay. Sit on the couch and listen to you complain about Carson or Levi’s possible departure from Facebook. You’d kill to have a glass of wine and ask him all about the anxiety he felt. Ask him what it’s been like to deal with a team of professionals who devoted their entire lives to keeping your image clean, just to fuck it up after a few too many drinks.

The doorbell rang, though, only three seconds after the water shut off. You rounded the counter to open it, he raised his eyebrows and offered Glenne a toothy grin when she stepped inside, sunglasses nearly falling off her face as she balanced the two pizzas with a six pack of beer on top.

“Here,” you said, reaching to lighten her load. Harry stepped out of the way and she let the pizzas slide onto the counter.

“Jesus--traffic was fucking terrible and I’m pretty sure I found three gray hairs today.”

“Well, nice to see you too, Glenney,” Harry teased, heading for the door. “I”ll catch you all later.”

He disappeared out into the front yard but waved before the door shut behind him. Glenne let out a long breath, wiped her hands on her pants before she smiked. “How’s that going?”

You let your eyelids flutter in annoyance. “It’s not going--it’s just, I don’t know. Making the best of it.”

“I heard Dave called with the results, though,” she freed a can of beer from the plastic rings and popped it open, she was never one to hesitate. “That’s good, must be a load off to know they can’t fight anything now.”

“Yeah,” you said. You went to fetch a few plates above the sink. “That’s why he came over, I guess.”

“Jeff was relieved, to be honest. He texted me earlier about it. He meant it the other day when he said he believed you. But, it’s good, now we’re all on the same page and everyone can just kind of settle in.”

“What are we settling in for?” Lexi’s towel-wrapped head poked out from the bathroom, steam floated towards the ceiling.

Glenne smiled at the sight of her friend, an amused look on her face when Lexi tightened the towel around her chest. “Y/N having Harry’s baby.”

“It’s my baby, too,” you reminded them, opening the lid of one of the pizza boxes and looking inside. “You’re both assholes about that, honestly. Just because he’s famous we get to call it his all the time?”

“The results are in,” Glenne informed Lexi, breezing past your negative review of their language use. “Drumroll, please.”

Lexi tapped her hands on the door frame, letting out a snort of a laugh when her towel almost came loose.

“Harry’s the father,” Glenne shouted, gaining composure when she cleared her throat. “No surprise there, little miss dry spell over here.”

You gave her the finger when you pulled a piece of pizza onto your own plate.

“You really think they both believed me before the results?”

Glenne grabbed a plate and held it up for you to give her a slice. “Harry and Jeff?”

Lexi disappeared into her bedroom for a second, came back out with a t-shirt and shorts in hand as she tried to dress in the living room without giving any sort of a show.

“Jeff was nervous. He just wanted a definitive either way.” She shrugged her shoulders. “Harry never questioned it, from what I can tell.”

You weren’t sure why your stomach flipped at that. The veggie topped pizza was more appetizing now than it was when Lexi texted her order to Glenne earlier than afternoon. “Not at all?”

“You don’t really give off the pathological liar vibes,” she teased, heading for the couch. “You know, this might be hard for you to believe, but--I don’t actually think he’s as much of a sex god as you think.”

“I don’t think he’s a sex god,” you pulled a face. You didn’t dare tell either of them about how many times you thought about that night. And you definitely didn’t tell them that it was the best sex you ever had.

His lips pressed again the side of your shoulder, the duvet cool against the skin of your back. You turned your head to look at him.

“You’re quite beautiful,” he mumbled.

“Do you say that to every girl you bring up here?”

He laughed a little, eyelashes fluttered against his cheek. “Some of them.”

“You clearly think he’s had sex with everyone in Los Angeles.”

“Not everyone,” you defended. “Just most women.”

“Well he hasn’t. I think he’s only had sex with like, six or seven girls total.”

“Ever?” You asked.

“Yes!”

“How is that possible?” Lexi asked, her eyes narrowed.

“I don’t know--he’s always been pretty tame. I mean, don’t get me wrong, he’s dated casually and whatever, but, I don’t know. I don’t think he’s slept with anyone for a while either. At least not this year.”

Lexi pulled the shirt over her head and over the towel altogether. She shimmied the navy blue fabric off once she was covered. “Does Jeff know every detail of his life?”

“Probably more than he should.”

You settled onto the couch beside Glenne, picked all the olives off your pizza. “What has he said about me getting pregnant to you?”

“Harry? Or Jeff?”

“Both.”

“Harry,” Lexi corrected. “She means Harry.” You rolled your eyes.

Glenne took a bite, looked up towards the ceiling before she wiped her mouth. “He was freaked at first--I know that. After we had dinner that night he talked to Jeff like twice a day for a good week. I know he was worried about telling his family.”

“Right.”

“But he’s been okay, actually. Jeff was more freaked out, I think, especially at first. But--Harry’s…” she trailed off, she looked over at Lexi and then brought her eyes back to you.

“What?”

“I’m kind of surprised how much he’s made his peace with it.”

You sat with that for a second. You’d always sensed that from him, even in the beginning. A strange way of calmness about him when everything else seemed to be crashing down around you. That night on Glenne’s driveway, the stars overhead and the way he sat on the grass beside you. Still.

“Me too.” Quiet for a second. Lexi was now in the kitchen, surveying each pizza to choose the piece she wanted before she grabbed a beer and came to sit on the floor in front of you. “Am I not supposed to hang out with him?”

Glenne held her beer can in hand, she lifted her gaze to you. “Harry? No--not that I know of. Did they say something about that in the meeting or something?

You shook your head. “No--I don’t know--I just feel like Jeff doesn’t want Harry to be on my side.”

“Fuck Jeff,” Lexi laughed, biting into the slice on her plate.

Glenne ignored Lexi’s comment, took a sip and thought about it. “No. He just wants everything to work out. He doesn’t want anything to--” she trailed off again.

“What?”

She dropped your gaze for a second, as if she was contemplating saying something she knew she shouldn’t. “Look,” she sighed. “I think Jeff’s biggest worry is that it could get messy, you know?”

“How?”

“I don’t know, I guess if either one of you develops feelings, or something. I just think Jeff wants everything to be thought out and planned and executed accordingly,” she laughed at her own words.

“Bitch you sound just like him,” Lexi laughed.

“Bitch I don’t care,” Glenne made a face before she giggled.

Planned. Of course Jeff wanted it to be planned. You wanted everything to be planned too. You wanted everything to have a sequence, a logical order and a contingency plan, just in case.

“That’s not going to happen, though. The feelings shit.” You took another bite of pizza, as if chewing would hinder them from asking any more questions.

Glenne smiled knowingly. “I mean--yeah, it might not. But--he’s also--”

“Cute, talented, famous,” Lexi counted off, raising her eyebrows in a suggestive way.

“You guys--you’re acting as if I have no self control.”

“You’re pregnant with his child,” Lexi retorted. “How on earth do you get pregnant with someone’s baby and start hanging out and having dinner and not have any feelings for them--especially when it’s someone like him!”

“When you’re an independent adult who has her own life.”

She gave up. She rolled her eyes and opened her beer and let Glenne take over. “You wouldn’t be the first person, Y/N. It’s just not as simple with him, you know? A lot more at stake.”

“I get it!” You said, voice a bit more distressed now. “I know what you’re saying, you don’t have to worry.”

“How often are you seeing him, anyway? One of you said something last week at brunch about it--but, I wasn’t about to put you on trial in public.”

“How thoughtful,” Lexi ragged.

You waited. You looked around the room. The clock on the wall ticked, Glenne took a sip of beer. You looked down at Lexi, knowing that she’d never let you lie your way out of this one. “I don’t know. I’ve seen him a few times.”

Her ear met her shoulder, a hesitant smile. “Aside from the meetings and stuff?”

You nodded. Took another bite, buying yourself time.

“And the doctors appointments?”

“We had dinner that one time at his house--that’s what he was referring to the other day.”

Now it was her turn to nod. She wanted you to say more.

“But we had dinner two other times. Casual--literally In N’ Out. But--I don’t know. He keeps saying he wants to get to know me.”

Lexi’s eyes went wide. You hadn’t divulged that yet. The two of them exchanged a look, sent some sort of telepathic message.

“What?” You asked. “I think that’s fair--right? I’m literally having his baby.”

“I thought it was yours?” Lexi joked.

You shot her a look. “Oh for fuck’s sake, you know what I mean.”

“I think it’s totally normal that he wants to get to know you,” Glenne supported.

You sighed, took another bite and wished you could down the entire can of beer that Glenne left on the coffee table.

“He’s always been saying that about you.”

Lexi’s eyes got wide again.

“What? What do you mean?”

Glenne laughed. “I don’t know--I think he kind of had a crush on you before all this started.”

You pulled your head back in surprise, looked down to meet Lexi’s gaze. She was equally shocked. “What on earth makes you think that?”

“He’s always kind of asked about you. Back in the fall he asked, then he asked again after you two hooked up. He’s been intrigued.”

“I mean, clearly,” Lexi snickered. “He put a bun in her oven.”

“Whatever. Any type of intrigue or whatever is definitely different now,” you told them.

“I think you should go for it,” Lexi shrugged. “Worst case scenario you blame it on the hormones and he still has to deal with you for another eighteen years.”

You brushed her suggestion off. It was unrealistic. You changed the subject and successfully got them to forget about the impending chaos that would ensue if the butterflies in your stomach became uncaged or set free.

So you watched the two of them get drunk off of cheap beer--eventually option for celebratory shots in your honor, they said. You let Lexi eat all of your olives and you showed them the app you’d been using to track it. In only a few days, the baby had graduated from a pea to a cherry. They grow up so fast, you faked a few tears before bed.

Glenne slept on the couch and was gone when you woke up in the morning. She left a note on the counter. Love you and your little cherry!

At the end of the ninth week, you got the news that Levi was officially headed for Apple. Simone and Aarav insisted on a celebratory margarita even though you hadn’t been offered a promotion (yet), but you somehow managed to convince them you’d appreciate a celebratory milkshake instead. You threw it up entirely once you got home--the nausea was getting much worse.

But on the tenth week you rounded a corner. You woke up one morning excited for coffee. It was rare now, really, that you woke up hungry or even in the mood for a cup of coffee before you got to work.

And everything was fine. The smell of it was fine, the look of it was fine. You took a sip and swore that something was off. Then you took a bite of the buttered toast and that was off, too.

Another bite. Another sip. Something was definitely wrong.

You stared at yourself in the bathroom mirror, wondering if you’d truly gone crazy. You stuck your tongue out, moved it side to side to take a look. Nothing.

The phone rang twice before he answered. “Hi,” he said, voice groggy and low.

“Everything tastes like pennies.”

“What?” He cleared his throat, you could hear the sheets ruffling beneath him. “Why? What do you mean?”

“I mean everything tastes like pennies.”

“Everything?”

“Yes, everything,” you looked at your watch. 8:21am. He was definitely out cold, and now, instead, he was dealing with what may or may not be a pregnancy induced delusion. “Sorry--I know it’s early. I just don’t have anyone else to panic with.”

“Where’s Lexi? Are you home alone?”

“She’s on set already. She’s sick of hearing me complain about symptoms anyway. And I guess,” you let the real reason slip out, “I haven’t talked to you in a few days.”

He laughed a little. A quiet one, an early morning, half-asleep laugh. You wondered what he looked like when he first woke up. You shook your head--what a stupid thought.

“I know, love--you’re the one who’s been too busy to see me. What are you doing after work tonight?”

“I dunno, probably googling what the fuck is wrong with me.”

“Don’t think anything’s wrong with you. I can call Dr. Weston, though, if you want.”

“No,” you said. You refused to let him do anything boyfriendy, that felt too weird. “It’s fine. I’ll just google it.”

But you didn’t have the chance. By the time you hung up and got yourself put together enough to head for the office, a link came across your phone, a message from Harry.

Harry (8:31am): Link: Metallic Taste in Mouth during Pregnancy (Dysgeusia) - whattoexpect.com

You smiled at the text. A flush on your cheeks and a somersault in your belly. Not the kind reserved for a friendly interaction or a nice message from a coworker. No--this was the type of stupid cheesy grinning that you did at the computer screen when you were thirteen and instant messaging boys far past your bedtime.

You clicked your phone shut and got settled at work. But he was definitely hard to ignore.

Harry (9:04am): Just read more about it. They say it happens in the first trimester so that’s probably what it is, right?

Harry (9:05am): I mean, you didn’t bite your tongue, right? It’s not blood? Does it taste like blood at all? This other article is saying some people taste blood.

Y/N L/N (9:07am): Yeah it’s like metal. That’s probably it! If it doesn’t go away I’ll call Dr. Weston.

Harry (9:08am): Okay, let me know. Do you want to come to mine for dinner tonight?

You stared at the message. Glenne’s words echoed in your head. Maybe you shouldn’t have even called him this morning. Maybe you were overreacting about not hearing from him and maybe you were losing it altogether.

But it had been four days. He’d texted you the day after you saw him, after Glenne and Lexi had lectured you about everything under the sun. He asked how work was and you filled him in over text about your coffee with Levi. You still had almost six weeks before Levi left Facebook altogether, still no mention of if you were going to get the promotion or not.

So maybe it was that. Maybe you were just stressed about work and the nausea was getting to your head. Maybe that was why you said yes.

And the fact that he was excited to see you only made it worse. He had music playing and dinner already cooking when you walked through the door that evening. He’d already texted you to tell you the code for the gate, just come on in, he said. I’ll be here.

He had a dish towel over his shoulder, a smile on his face as you sat and watched him cook. He promised this meal would be better, a new one he’d just seen online and wanted to give it a go.

Aren’t you too busy to learn new recipes? You teased. Musician, actor, and chef?

When it was almost ready, though, he paused. “Can I actually show you something?”

You sipped at the water he’d handed you, watched as he put the spatula down and headed for the living room. “I’m not a fan of surprises, to be honest.”

“Noted,” he said--but he didn’t really seem to be listening. Instead, he reached for something on the coffee table. Fabric, of some sort.

He brought it back over and put it down in front of you. It was white, tiny yellow ducks in a row. It was rolled up, but when you pulled the string and flattened it out, he spoke. “S’a onesie. I saw it out at some store--not a big deal. Just thought it was cute.”

There weren’t tears this time, which would have been almost expected. Instead, a warmth in your belly and a fire beneath your ribs. You smiled up at him. “It’s adorable.”

“Figured she’ll look good in it.”

“Or he--yellow,” you laughed. “Very gender neutral of you.”

One day there’d be a baby inside of it. Ten fingers, ten toes, eyes and a nose and a mouth that cried for both of you. He avoided your gaze for a second, you folded the onesie back up and let out a breath when he went back to the stove. “Are you scared at all?”

He laughed a little, bit on his lip and smiled as he stirred the contents of the dish. “Terrified.”

“Really? You’ve been so--calm, this whole time.”

He shrugged, turned the burner on low and rested his elbows on the counter. “I think I didn’t want to freak you out. I could tell from the start that you were losing it, really. Going quite mental,” he laughed. “I just wanted to be there for you.”

“Well...I appreciate it,” you said. “I’ve needed that.”

He nodded, the sun was setting behind you, casting a glow to the living room. He didn't say anything when he walked around the counter and let his arms drape over your shoulders, pulling your face into his chest. He didn’t say anything when he kissed the top of your head and then let go, an electric current coursing through your limbs.

“She’s a cherry now.”

He went back to the stove and nodded. “I know,” he said. “I got the same app.”

More butterflies at that. He was paying attention? He cared? He was also tracking the growth of your little fruit on an app with pictures and daily notifications?

You bit at your lip. “Soon she’ll be a pear.”

“One day she’ll be a cantaloupe.”

You faked a look of fear. “That’ll be tough.”

“I think you’ll be alright.” Quiet for a second, then he corrected himself. “We’ll be alright.”

Lexi begged you to come. She’d been telling you about it for a good two weeks leading up, but it didn’t make you want to go any more.

Glenne loved you, you knew that. It wasn’t a question of if she wanted you there or not, or if Lexi wanted you there. It was more a question of if Jeff wanted you around and if Harry wanted you around and you didn’t feel like finding out, especially not when the size of your belly had slowly increased, but not enough to make you look anything other than bloated.

So a bathing suit was a no go. There were too many people who didn’t even know about this. Jeff’s friend Zack and his girlfriend Mira. Glenne’s younger sister Heidi and her favorite coworker Nicki.

So you’d planned to spend the Fourth of July alone on your couch with some ice pops. You were more than happy to watch the fireworks on TV and get an early night of sleep, only interrupted by a drunk Lexi stumbling in at 2am.

But apparently, Harry wouldn’t have it that way.

“I’m freezing,” you said, reaching forward to push the vent away from you, he took a left turn into Jeff and Glenne’s neighborhood.

“You were hot three seconds ago,” he said with a smirk, turning the knob to lessen air in the car.

“I’m pregnant,” you said, turning to look at him quickly. “And it’s your fault,” you joked.

“You know, for someone who said she wouldn’t hold that against me, you’ve done a lot of holding that against me.”

You tried to fight the smile but couldn’t. He’d shown up unannounced. At first he said he just wanted ice cream. There’s nowhere good near my house. All the good places are near yours.

But when he told you to pack a bathing suit and a change of clothes, you figured a dingy Dairy Queen down the street wasn’t the actual destination. You already told him why you didn’t want to go when he invited you a week ago.

I won’t really know anyone there. I’ll have to pretend I don’t know you. Jeff seems annoyed by my existence and I don’t feel like pissing him off more than I already have.

He swore you were wrong. He promised that Jeff wasn’t mad and that you’d know plenty of people and he swore that no one there would even notice if you spent the entire night glued to his side. He made it sound like that was an option and you tried not to blush.

And that made you remember it again: his world was different than yours. Of course Glenne and Jeff were friends with people who weren’t star struck by celebrities. Glenne’s beautiful friends from work and her gorgeous younger sister were probably grabbing coffee with guys like Zac Efron on the reg.

But that didn’t stop the nerves from going haywire inside of you when Harry led you around the back. Lexi was already there, red solo cup tilted towards the sky when you both walked up behind her.

“Look who decided to come out,” she teased, letting an arm drape over your shoulders. “Love you, mean it!”

You laughed, thankful for the sunglasses that let you scan the crowd. Jeff’s brother, check. You met him last year. Another guy from Jeff’s office, check, he definitely looked familiar. Glenne’s sister, her coworker, another girl that Lexi had definitely introduced you to at some point. So far, so good.

Glenne appeared behind you, already tipsy and in a crop top. “Hi lovie,” she smiled, wrapping her arms around you. “How ya doin’?”

“Good,” you said, thankful for a second away from Harry. He was already distracted, he offered a handshake to a guy who you swore was at that dinner last fall. “Hoping he forgets all about the bet today, to be honest.”

“Oh shit,” Lexi said, nodding. “I totally fucking forgot. He’s gonna get wasted, no doubt.”

You laughed a little, ignoring the jealousy that washed through you. You weren’t a huge drinker, a rosé or bubbly type of girl, if anything. Tequila was nice and vodka had it’s moments. But at this point, you’d kill for a sip of a cold mixed drink. Hell, at this point, you might even take a tiny hit of Lexi’s miracle weed--her words, not yours.

With the stress of work and Harry and life in general, you felt desperate. So a Fourth of July party seemed like the perfect place to remember why people use protection.

Glenne lowered her voice, let her elbow knock into your side when she looked over at Harry. “Pretty scandalous to show up here together, no?”

“What? Why?” You tried to downplay it. “I didn’t even want to come, which I made very clear to all of you.”

“Hey, things are going well in paradise, okay? Leave the girl alone,” Lexi told her.

“No one is in Paradise. We’re in Laurel Canyon.”

“Sure,” Glenne smirked.

“Alright--not hanging out with you two,” you offered a sarcastic grin and walked away, sidling right up to Harry when he turned to see you.

“Matt, this is,” a pause, a look on his face like he didn’t know what to call you. “My friend--Y/N, this is Matt, he used to work with Jeff.”

“Nice to meet you,” you stuck a hand out, offered him a smile when he lifted his sunglasses to let you get a good look at his face.

“I don’t think we’ve met before,” he said, a hawaiian shirt was unbuttoned down the middle of his chest.

“No, probably not,” you said over the music. “I don’t come around here much.”

“Y/N--do you want to go get a drink inside?”

You looked over to Harry, a bit surprised by his sudden desire. He forced a smile down at you, his eyes hoping to communicate something--but you couldn’t tell what. You followed him inside after offering an apologetic smile and a see you later, to Matt.

He tugged you towards the kitchen once you stepped through the sliding doors to the interior of the house.

“Let’s not like--y’know--pick up guys here.”

“What?”

“S’just awkward, alright?”

“What are you talking about?”

“He was into you!”

“He was?” You looked over his shoulder, watched as Matt laughed at something Glenne said to Heidi. “How do you know?” You were flattered--after waking up and feeling like your stomach had puffed out a bit too far, it was nice to know that you still had some type of sex appeal.

Being pregnant didn’t feel sexy so far.

“How do I know? He was obvious!”

“Are you jealous?” The words fell out of your mouth innocently, curiously. A wave of embarrassment at first. Maybe you shouldn’t have asked.

His eyebrows furrowed together, he pulled his chin away from you, rolled his eyes. “No, I just--I don’t know. That’d be weird.”

“All of this is weird,” you reminded.

“Yeah, well, we don’t have to add to it.”

You ignored the way he turned around, looked at Matt again and then turned back to you. “I’m gonna get--nevermind.”

“Get what?”

“Nothing.”

You smirked. “A drink?”

“No.”

“Bullshit.”

“I was gonna say that but I forgot. It’s fine.” He walked over to the counter, ignored all of the bottles of liquor and reached for a solo cup.

“You don’t have to do this.”

He shoved it under the tap and turned on the faucet. “It’s like Sober September, but--for longer.”

“Is that a thing?”

He shrugged, took a sip. “I think so.” Quiet for a second, you scanned the room again for anyone you knew.

“Does weed count?”

“Yes it counts,” you looked at him like he was crazy. Anything I can’t you can’t do either. Drugs, drinks, that’s the same thing.”

He sighed, bit at his lower lip before his mouth curved into a smile. “You’re lucky I like you.”

You didn’t want to tell him, but you knew you were.

table of contents | talk to me + join the tag list

author’s note: you have no idea how hard it is to give you this chapter and NOT chapter seven yet. Big things are coming, folks. Come chat it up with me cause *disclaimer* i’m gonna have some wine tonight so it’ll be a good time.

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