#i like to think she was like that. always taking the easy path out. never fighting back against what she considered her nature.

[wanderingwolfwitcher]

"Ahh, right. I had almost forgotten about that. That they would teach you telepathy. A Sorceress named Sabrina Glevissig did that to me often in the past... as did one called Yennefer. They had far less restraint, tact and respect about invading my thoughts and memories against my will as well. Your restraint is very appreciated."

Eskel's low tone returned after a few moment's consideration, inclining his head. When she spoke about Triss, looked down to her, his attention returned in full back to Rhaena's, reading the beauty's features and tone closely and expertly. He sensed the jealousy at once... a near foreign concept to him in his personal life, but one he understood enough about... given how much it could be involved in the contracts and problems he was called upon to resolve. A motive many people had for the things they did, and the source of many of the world's problems. It was more the idea that somebody would be jealous over him of all people that felt strange... if rather touching. Somebody wanting him for themselves. Wasn't something he was used to, to say the least. It seemed she really had been thinking about him during her training, after all that time. The Witcher's marred visage smiled back at her, viper eyes meeting her dark pair, and leaning in, his deep, calm voice murmured back to her again reassuringly. Reaching out a hand to gently stroke through some of the strands of the eastern woman's dark hair.

"It ain't like that, with Triss. We're close, she is certainly very attractive, I would be a tasteless fool not to notice beauty, but we haven't been together. I trust her as I do you... though I wouldn't underestimate either of you. Don't take it personal, I've been single longer than you or her combined have been alive. In my experience I haven't ever been the jealous type or the sort to get attached. Not since I learned young. I always have to be ready to move on to the next place on the Path and probably never see the same lover again. Or ready for them to vanish on me quickly. Have had to start over many times. It is easy for me to forget it isn't that way for most others. Relationship dynamics and how a Witcher sees the world would probably be alien as Vampires to you more normal folk."

@rhaenaofmyr

@wanderingwolfwitcher [as discussed]

She clutches the cloak tighter about her frame, drawing the hood up over her head to at least try to keep the snow out of her eyes.

Rhaena had thought she would grow used to the chills that winters on The Continent brought. It had been near four years since she had fled from Westeros, where she had been condemned to a life of poverty in King’s Landing. She’d had no clue where she would end up when she stole away into the belly of a merchant ship, and it would seem that had the crew- she would later learn that their original destination had been Essos, but wild storms had sent them adrift and now here she was.

She’d traversed her way through this strange new world, eventually settling in a small village close to the mountains of Kaedwen. Of course, without a coin to her name, she had had to find work quickly, but the village’s pleasure house had employed her the moment they had laid eyes upon her. It was not something she particularly enjoyed, but it earned her enough to purchase a small homestead on the outskirts of the village.

The storm had set in as she was returning home and quickly, she had lost her bearings in the blizzard. She’d ended up in the forest that circled the village, entirely blind to the true way home. She paused for a moment, dark eyes casting this way and that to look for something familiar. But so thick was the snow that she could scarcely see her hand in front of her face. And she did not see the creature until it had knocked her to the ground, sharp claws pressing into her chest as it pins her down. All she can see now is teeth, growing ever closer as it leans down to take the death bite-

Suddenly, she hears the swing of the sword through the icy air, the thud of the creatures head as it lands close to hers, and feels the warm spray of blood across her face. Eyes remain shut for several moments before she slowly opens them, gaze falling upon the man in the dark red cloak, who stands above her.

Eyes wide with fear, she scrambles to her feet. Beneath the hood, she can make out yellow eyes and a large scar that marrs his face. She’s seen him around the village from time to time- she cannot recall his name, but she knows he is one of the elusive Witchers who spend their winters nearby.

“Th-thank you, Ser…” she says with as much bravery as she can muster, words heavily accented. “Forgive me but…I have no coin for you…”

[thermodynamic-comedian]

sometimes when i think about helen distortion i think about that one csh lyric that's like. "i believe that evil is a concept created by others to deal with their own nature. i understand my own nature, good and evil have nothing to do with it."

[altruisticalastor]

↳˗ˏˋAlastor x Readerˊˎ˗ ↴

☒ Summary: The Radio Demon proves to be quite a doting husband as he and his doe expierence many firsts together. Exploring his softer sides, may bring out a more posessive side of Alastor in the process.

☒ Warnings: fem!reader, she/her pronouns used, doe!reader, the reader is shorter than al, implied size difference, soft!alastor, posessive!alastor, lots of tooth rotting fluff, sexual themes but i wouldn't consider this smut, first times, alastor in a rut, knotting, breeding, pregnacy, many domestic moments between reader and alastor

☒ Word Count: 2,337

Alastor was drawn to you the moment you crossed paths. The spotted ears planted atop your head, heart-shaped antlers, and a plush tail to match were striking. The Radio Demon hadn't ever seen a fellow deer hybrid in hell until you. But Alastor just knew that he had to have you all to himself. 

Since your first meeting, the two of you were inseparable. It didn't take long until you wed, and anyone who dared to try and cozy up to The Radio Demon's darling doe joined his next broadcast. Alastor was insanely possessive of you. He always had you tucked underneath his arm, crimson eyes following your every move. The only time they weren't on you, was when The Radio Demon was busy... taking care of business.

You were timid and pure. Alastor had no clue how you even ended up in hell. Surely, the gods were mistaken by not taking you. But alas, that softness you carried only made The Radio Demon's obsession for you all the more extreme. You were his weak spot, his darling wife. The love of his afterlife. 

You adored waking up next to Alastor each morning. He didn't rest often but snuggled into you each night to appease you. Which just made your heart flutter with delight. The only time you awoke to an empty bed, was when your husband slipped away to make breakfast for you. 

For the most part, you would sleepily wobble into the kitchen. Wrapping your arms around Alastor's waist from behind while he cooked his heart out. Alastor would hum a soft tune while he finished making your breakfast. Reveling in the warmth his cute wife emitted.

The Radio Demon would often spin on his heel. Encircling his large palms around your waist. He loved lifting you, so the tips of your toes planted flat against the top of his shoes as he spun you around the kitchen. Your laughter and his singing filled the sacred space you shared. You may have been in hell, but anywhere you were with Alastor was heavenly. 

Alastor never failed to notice how flustered you got as you gazed up at him. The man was over seven feet tall, so typically, he was taller than most. However, you were adorably short in comparison. His hands blanketed yours entirely. Alastor absolutely loved to bend down before you. Treasuring how your ears tipped back coyly as he met you at eye level. You were so easy to read. You couldn't hide anything from your husband. Even if you tried. 

You came to notice that physical touch wasn't something Alastor particularly liked. Except when it came to you. Your husband was constantly all over you. Holding your hand, wrapping an arm around your waist, pulling you into his lap anytime he sat down. You name it. Knowing that you were the only exception made you feel special.

But even still, you never pushed the matter. If anything, you waited for Alastor to initiate the physical intimacy, which happened more frequently than one might think- considering The Radio Demon's reputation. 

Sex wasn't something you discussed much at the beginning of your relationship. Alastor briefly mentioned that he never desired such things when he was alive. But once he became a demon, a deer hybrid at that- he started experiencing ruts. He explained that he would usually tuck away from the world until his rut passed, but that was as far as the conversation went. Relief washed over you, knowing that you weren't alone in that aspect. Your periods of estrus always made you feel shameful but, most of all... unbearably needy.

Alastor prided himself on knowing that he was a man of great composure. However, when his routine rut hit after you both had tied the knot- he expected to be able to control his urges. But that proved to be impossible for The Radio Demon. At the start of his rut, he kept his distance. Avoiding all physical contact with you. Naturally, you understood and tried to support him the best you could from afar. 

But it didn't take long for Alastor's poise to completely crumble. Your scent was all over your shared home, and any glimpse of you had him throbbing in his pants. 

Before you knew it, your husband was on you. Nipping and kissing up the expanse of your throat. Grumbling and groaning against your neck, begging you to help in through his heat. Your body trembled with need as Alastor's hands roamed along your frame in a way he never had before. 

His touches were prompt, frantic, and perverse. You wouldn't dream of denying your darling husband during his time of need. Knowing that Alastor would be your first and last lover; as you would be his, sent your heart pounding against your ribcage.

As desperate as your husband was for release, his touch was undoubtedly gentle. Alastor was slow to undress you, laying you flat atop your shared bed. He placed chaste kisses on every square inch of your skin, making your ears twitch with delight. Your husband whispered sweet nothings into your skin as he worked a finger into your tight heat for the very first time. 

Alastor's deft digit stretched you out slowly. The copious amount of slick dripping down your thighs made it easy for him to add another finger. You were on cloud nine being touched by your darling husband in such a way. You could feel the need he had for you, and it only added to the pleasure. 

Your husband was a bit hesitant the first time he pushed himself inside your welcoming walls. His hands were trembling around your waist as he buried himself to the hilt inside you. You could tell he was unfamiliar with such things; it was endearing. Alastor's face loomed over yours as he beckoned into you slowly. He gazed down at you with so much adoration as he succumbed to pleasure. 

You didn't fail to notice the tears of merriment trickling down Alastor's flush cheeks as his pace quickened. Carefully, you wiped them away. Moaning in pure ecstasy as you and your husband reveled in the unforgettable moment you shared. A gasp escaped you as you felt him begin to swell from deep within you. 

From the look on Alastor's face, you could tell he was just as perplexed as you were. The base of your lover's length swelled so much, that he could hardly pull back. You were quite literally stuck together. It didn't take long for you to understand what had happened once Alastor released his seed deep inside you. 

The feeling of your husband being so close, enveloping and marking you as his, pushed you over the edge. Once Alastor's knot deflated inside you, finally allowing him to slip out of your heat, his eyes averted from yours. He was uncharacteristically quiet as he attempted to regain his composure. 

Slowly, he explained that he had no clue that he was capable of knotting until only moments ago. You couldn't help but flush as you admitted to liking it more than you probably should have. Your confession unlocked something from deep inside your husband's psyche. Safe to say that you both shared a long night of exploring one another's pleasures and eccentricities. 

Your husband began craving you sexually even when he wasn't in a rut after your first night together. Alastor seemed to have developed a fixation with breeding you, which you weren't opposed to. The thought of starting a family with your doting husband plagued your mind often. 

So it wasn't a massive surprise to you when you discovered you were pregnant only a couple months later. When you broke the news to Alastor, he was elated. Your husband lifted you in his arms, spinning you around the kitchen as you both grinned brightly. Alastor wasted no time pitching name ideas for your fawn, melting your heart entirely.

You were about seven months along when your husband informed you of his next prospect at the Hazbin Hotel. Happily, you joined your husband in his endeavor. At first, the people you met who resided at the hotel didn't believe you were Alastor's spouse. For crying out loud, he was the infamous Radio Demon. The ruthless overlord that moved up the ranks faster than ever before. 

But to you, he was simply the doting husband that took pride in loving you. Who rubbed your feet from how much they swelled during your pregnancy. The man who hummed his favorite tunes to you as you dozed off each night, caressing your ears lovingly in the process. 

It took a good while but over time you developed a good relationship with the residents. Charlie was so caring and helpful. She did tons of research on pregnancy to be able to aid you. The Princess of Hell loved rubbing your belly, feeling the little kicks, and humming happy songs to your little fawn.

Vaggie was overly protective of you. Not to Alastor's level- but certainly up there. She acted like your bodyguard at times, even in the safety of your and Alastor's room. It made you giggle, but you appreciated it nonetheless. 

Angel was a hoot. At first, he would ask you indecent questions about your and Alastor's sex life. But Husk always put him in his place at times like that. Eventually, Angel became somewhat of a brother to you. He and Fat Nuggets would sit on your bed with you late at night while Alastor worked in his radio tower. Angel would put on all the best rom-com movies, laughing and crying alongside you.

You knew Husk beforehand, having a civil relationship for the most part. But as more time passed at the hotel, he began to warm up to you. If anything, Husk feared for you. He didn't like Alastor in the slightest- and he didn't want you to get caught in The Radio Demon's crossfire. So he kept a watchful gaze on you, especially now that you were pregnant. 

A small smile etched into your features as you heard the bedroom door swing open. Alastor was home early, something that didn't happen often. You sunk lower into your bubble bath, letting a soft sigh escape you as your husband's footsteps got louder. A moment later, the bathroom door swung open. Revealing the one and only; Alastor. 

"How is my darling doe and fawn doing on this wonderful evening?" Alastor boomed, approaching the tub swiftly. Wasting no time kneeling beside the tub. You giggled as your husband slipped his gloves off, dunking his palms beneath the water to caress your plump belly. 

"Hmm, better now that you're here," You whispered. Rubbing your palms over the back of his hands. Alastor craned his neck, giving you a chaste kiss. You couldn't help but smile against your lover's lips as your little fawn kicked right at that very moment. "See! Our little one is happy too, now that daddy's here." 

Alastor gazed at you with much adoration as he felt another kick, further solidifying your words. "Well, in that case! I suppose I should strive to get home earlier from now on, hm?" Your husband remarked, slowly pulling his hands from the tub. Alastor didn't miss a beat as he grabbed a washcloth. Lathering it up with your favorite soap before dipping his hands below the water once more. 

"Miss falling asleep next to you, Al," You sighed, eyes fluttering shut as your husband washed you. Alastor was so gentle as he scrubbed you clean. Making sure to massage your sore muscles in the process. "I know, my dear, I know." He cooed. Humming a gentle tune as he slid behind you from outside the tub. Working the knots out of your tense shoulders. 

"Our little fawn will be here soon... you nervous?" You asked softly, letting out a pleasant hum as Alastor massaged your back. His lips ghosted along the shell of your ear as he whispered, "Quite the contrary, my darling! I'm over the moon with excitement. I simply cannot wait to meet our little one."

Alastor's words caused your heart to flutter against your ribcage. You were the nervous one. You just hoped your child would be happy and healthy. "Don't worry your pretty little head, my dear! Our fawn is in good hands. Don't you see how much the patrons here adore you and our unborn child?"

Your husband always knew when you were nervous. It was as if he could read your mind. The sound of the soapy water sinking down the drain caused your eyes to flutter open. Alastor now stood with a towel outstretched in his arms. He beckoned you toward him, wrapping you in his arms as you stepped out of the tub. Your tail wagged with joy as your husband dried you off. 

"You're right... thanks for reminding me, my love," You smiled, tilting your face up against your husband's chest. Alastor took the hint, craning his neck to press his lips against yours. The kiss was warm and loving. Making you feel safe in his embrace. "No need to thank me, my dear! Come now, let's get you tucked in."

You squealed as your husband scooped you in his arms. Carrying you bridal style toward your shared bed. Alastor softly placed you under the duvet, wasting no time getting you warm and cozy in one of his button-up shirts. It smelled just like him, your favorite scent. Your husband stealthily removed his overcoat and shoes before making himself comfortable beneath the sheets.

Alastor cuddled up into your backside, wrapping his slender arms around your waist. He caressed your tummy lovingly as he kissed the top of your head, pulling your back flush against his chest. "There, now my darlings are ready to rest!" Your husband quipped, allowing his droopy eyelids to flutter shut. All you could do was hum in agreement as sleep overtook you. "Night, Al... love you..." 

"I love you more, my dear."

tags; @danveration @celestial-vomit @jyoongim

comment if you're intrested in being added to the taglist^^

[hannieehaee]

MAIN THING

18+ / mdi

summary: after years of insistence from soonyoung, he finally convinces resident social butterfly seungkwan to introduce him to his unrequited crush; a fellow idol at hybe who he has not been able to take his eyes off since moving to the company.

content: idol!hoshi x idol!reader, simp!hoshi, he's down horribly bad, seungkwan is fed up with hoshi, afab reader, smut, oral (m receiving), penetrative sex, etc.

wc: 11k

a/n: finally wrote a long hoshi fic everyone cheer

masterlist | kofi/patreon

support me through a one time tip<3

"Just introduce me to her. Please," whined Soonyoung for the nth time that week.

"I already said no! Just go talk to her yourself like a normal person," rebutted Seungkwan, attempting but failing at disregarding his insistent friend.

"He can't do that. Last time they made eye contact he ran to hide behind Mingyu," snickered Jeonghan, invested in this conversation whenever it was brought up.

"I just need you to get the ball rolling. Please, Kwan-ah," he pleaded as he got up in Seungkwan's personal space – a thing everyone knew not to do.

Rolling his eyes, he sighed, "She already knows who you are, you know. There's no need to introduce you," he muttered under his breath.

"Wait, what. She does? Like knows knows me? Or just knows of Hoshi of Seventeen?", his eyes widened in shock, grabbing onto Seungkwan's shoulders to get his full attention.

"She knows Kwon Soonyoung, dumbass. She's one of my closest friends, why wouldn't she know of you?", he grumbled, attempting to shake off his friend.

Soonyoung sighed at the short-lived hope he had of you having maybe taken an interest to him and brought him up in conversation with Seungkwan, just to have confirmation (yet again) of you simply knowing him as Seungkwan's groupmate.

It had been two, no, three years since Soonyoung had first developed a special interest in you. Thinking back to when Pledis was first acquired by Hybe, Soonyoung still remembered the first time he saw you in person very vividly.

Instantly, he developed a crush on you from the very first glance, only falling further any time you'd cross paths in the building.

He had known of your existence before that, of course, but had never truly acknowledged his obvious crush on you until he first met you in person.

Unfortunately for Soonyoung, he was far too shy and introverted to ever actually engage in conversation with you, much less slide his way into your life the way Seungkwan so easily had – Seungkwan, who had become one of your closest friends. On the contrary, Soonyoung would actively go out of his way to avoid you, never even so much as making eye contact whenever Seungkwan would bring you around.

It was easy for him to become the mockery of the members due to this. Leave it to him to have his years-long crush become best friends with one of his best friends, leading him to your constant, nerve-wracking proximity.

At some point he decided that maybe he should break out of his shell – the shell he had created specifically to shield himself from his feelings for you. He decided that instead of avoiding you, he'd do the next best thing ... which was to ask Seungkwan to officially re-introduce you to each other.

You were blissfully unaware of Soonyoung's crush, he knew that much. Did you know of his existence? Barely, as you'd only interacted a handful of times, with those always being brief and impersonal interactions. This gave Soonyoung the perfect opportunity to start brand new with you. Except he'd need the help of his most extroverted friend, who just so happened to be your best friend.

After begging Seungkwan to please work his social butterfly magic on him, he found himself unsuccessful. Seungkwan would merely scoff and tell him to grow up, leading Soonyoung to be mocked by one of the other eleven members, and then the cycle would repeat. Currently, it was Jeonghan's turn to snicker at Soonyoung's misery, it seemed.

Taking note of Soonyoung's pouty lips and saddened demeanor, Jeonghan took pity on him and clapped his hands decisively before speaking up again.

"Okay, how about you let Hoshining here take your place in doing the TikTok challenge for maestro with Y/N? If they hit it off, then you've done your due diligence, and if not, Soonie can just go get fucked. Everybody wins," he suggested as he shrugged at Seungkwan.

Soonyoung lit up at this, choosing to completely disregard the last two sentences of his suggestion. This was more than enough for him to get the ball rolling.

Immediately joining in on the plan, he turned to Seungkwan once more, ready to beg again.

"Don't say anything," Seungkwan shushed him with a lift of his finger, opposite hand now digging into his temple in what Soonyoung hoped to simply be exaggerated annoyance, "I'll do it, just, please grant me twenty minutes of silence," he pleaded.

That worked well enough for Soonyoung.

"Okay, fuck, I don't think I can do this."

"Are you fucking kidding me?", Seungkwan practically growled.

"What he means is that he's a little nervous. Right, Soonie?," Jeonghan tried to alleviate, standing behind Hoshi and rubbing his shoulders in an attempt to soothe him.

"You've been begging for this for weeks. I already told Y/N you'd be meeting her at her group's floor. You're doing this," huffed Seungkwan, not truly angry but just easily riled up by his friend's needless anxieties.

"I know! I'll do it, just- I need to hype myself up for it," he took a deep breath.

"C'mon, Soonie. You look great, all you have to do is go up to her and impress her with your dancing. Your natural chemistry will do the rest," reassured Joshua, who had been let in on the situation by Jeonghan just a few days prior.

Although most of the members were well aware of Soonyoung's embarrassing crush on you, not all of them truly took an interest. Jeonghan and Joshua seemed to want to keep informed simply for entertainment purposes. Soonyoung didn't care as long as they helped ease his nerves somehow. He needed all the support he could get as he attempted to calm himself down enough to go face the love of his life (How he got to that conclusion, he was unsure, but the label felt right at the moment).

After about twenty more minutes of annoyed groans from Seungkwan and occasional breakdowns from Soonyoung, the four boys finally made their way to your floor, with Soonyoung's members joining in just for emotional support, or maybe to mock his nerves from afar.

Spotting you as you leaned against the wall next to your practice room, Soonyoung gulped, blinking rapidly to make sure the sight was correct. You weren't even wearing anything out of the ordinary, yet Soonyoung was enamored by how pretty you looked in your usual rehearsal attire. He could picture you lounging around his house in a similarly comfortable outfit, maybe waking up early to make breakfast as he came up to you and pressed up against you, breathing in your shampoo and-

"Soonyoung! Go!," whisper-yelled Seungkwan after a few moments of Soonyoung freezing in the hallway, letting his imagination take over for too long.

"C'mon, go say hi, Soonie," said Hannie, seemingly sincere in his encouragement.

You hadn't spotted him yet, seeing as they had barely entered the long hallway and you were standing on the opposite end. However, just a few steps and the sound of his footsteps would likely catch your attention. The thought made him sweat. Despite having briefly interacted with you before, he just couldn't imagine a one-on-one with you. He knew for a fact that he'd crash and burn the moment you shared a smile with him.

It was too late now, though. He was already moving towards you, creating a distance between him and his members while decreasing the distance between you and him. That was when you heard him coming, turning to face him and immediately offering him a smile, waving him over to you.

It was obvious to Soonyoung how you and Seungkwan had become friends so easily. You were both so friendly and outgoing, welcoming anyone who'd come your way.

"Hey, Soonyoung-Ssi. I was waiting for you," you smiled, meeting him halfway through the hallway.

With an awkward smile, he gave you a light bow, which you returned. His hand went up to rub at the back of his neck right after, an easy tell of his nerves, "Hah, sorry for keeping you waiting, I, uh, just lost track of time."

That was believable enough. He was known to lose track of things quite often. Sometimes even getting lost himself. However, he did not want to give a bad impression, so he felt slightly bad despite your demeanor not expressing any disappointment.

"That's fine, don't worry about it," you reassured him before peaking behind him into the length of the hallway, "Uh, why are your members crowding by the elevator?", you chuckled.

Fuck, were they still back there? They were supposed to drop him off and leave right after.

"Oh, they're just-"

"Hey, Kwannie! Guys! Come over here!", you called out to them in your usual friendly demeanor, turning back to face him afterwards, "The fans would love it if we all do it together," you smiled at him, clearly unaware that Soonyoung had meant to get you alone.

And that's how his plan got ruined within less than a minute of alone time with you.

"Oh, uh, yeah, for sure," he mustered a smile at you – which was mostly genuine, as he couldn't help himself in smiling when you were so likable.

The guys looked thrown off by you calling them over, but followed through with your direction regardless. In only a few moments you were all inside your group's designated practice room as you propped up the staff-assigned phone and turned on the speakers in order to learn the short dance.

"So, who wants to help me with the dance?", you asked.

"I, uh-"

"Hoshi's an amazing teacher. He can show it to you!", interrupted Jeonghan before Soonyoung could stammer his way through an answer.

Being practically pushed towards you by both Joshua and Jeonghan, he awkwardly stepped forward, dumbly lifting a hand to uselessly wave at you shyly as he nodded.

You giggled(?) at this, scrunching up your face in what he believed to be cuteness(???), nodding at him in return.

"Yeah, we actually gotta go. We have a shoot coming up. We were just dropping Soonie off," said Jeonghan again, lying through his teeth.

Soonyoung knew that Jeonghan's original plan had been to spy on him as he fumbled his way through interacting with you, but since you'd spotted them, now Jeonghan had to come up with an excuse to leave Soonyoung alone with you. At least he was following through in wing-manning him.

Pouting, you okay'd Jeonghan and Joshua's departure, bidding goodbye to the two boys whom Soonyoung knew you considered to be friends of yours (unlike himself), leaving you alone with Kwannie and Soonyoung.

Seeing as Seungkwan was your best friend, it was unlikely you'd buy any excuse he had to leave you alone with Soonyoung without him having to at least allude the boy's embarrassing crush on you, – something that was completely out of limits – so now Soonyoung was stuck with a chaperone for his interaction with you. It wasn't what he was expecting, but it also took some pressure off him. Kwannie was a natural mood-maker.

After a few minutes of warming up together, Kwannie gestured at you to get into positions so Soonyoung could show you the dance, with Kwan following along in order to help your learning process quicken.

You got the majority of it pretty quickly – or at least for the most part. There was one complicated part of the footwork you seemed to be having a bit of complications with, causing Seungkwan to intervene.

"Hoshi, why don't you help her out? Come here," he gave Hoshi a look, eyes gesturing at him to come stand by your side.

Dumbly, he followed along, never in the state of mind to deny you (nor Seungkwan, apparently). With a nod of confirmation from you, he stood right by your side, slowing down his movements in order to break down the moves required for the dance.

You audibly awe'd at him and his skill, making him blush and look down, not wanting you to see his reddened face. Seungkwan snorted lowly in the background, something you luckily were too distracted to pay mind to, too into Soonyoung's dancing to notice.

"Uh, did you get that or should I go slower?", he asked after the fact.

"No, that's perfect, Soonyoung-Ssi, thank you," you gave him a casual bow of your head, "Wow, you're insanely good. Sorry if that's too informal to say," you praised him, not realizing such compliment would take him all the way to another universe.

"Ah, no, it's nothing, hah-"

"No, really! You should be a teacher. I think I got it all now. Look," you insisted, stopping to do a quick run-through of the 15-second dance in absolute perfection (at least if Soonyoung had anything to say about it), giggling by the end of it.

Seungkwan interrupted once more before Soonyoung could shower you with compliments over your dancing, "You know, he comes up with a lot of our choreos. He teaches us them, too."

Seungkwan hyping him up to you was very out of character, but Soonyoung was willing to take anything that could get you the tiniest bit interested in him. And it seemed like it worked, as you audibly gasped at that bit of information, turning to compliment him once more.

"Really? Wow, that's insane. Can I- You should show me sometime," you suggested, "I try to help with the creative process of my group's choreos sometimes, but it all gets meddled in my head. I could really use some pointers."

Soonyoung would be willing to make entire choreos for you on his own if you so much as asked, so of course he'd jump at the chance to help you with anything you needed. If you wanted him to cut his day short right this moment and drop everything to help you out, he'd do it without a second thought. Any motive to spend time with you one-on-one sounded more than reasonable to him.

"Yes, o-of course," he nodded enthusiastically while Seungkwan made a face in the background.

The next twenty minutes or so were spent recording the short video, attempting to get a perfect take in order to hand over to staff for posting. You stood in the middle while the two boys danced next to you. Hoshi was smiling like an idiot all throughout as he thought of the concept of the two of you dancing together on video. Maybe after this it could become a more common occurrence.

"Well, I'm gonna go now," said Seungkwan after it was all said and done, having settled on one of the many recordings you'd taken, "Gotta go have lunch with Gyu. I'll see you later Y/Nie," he gave you a quick hug and a kiss on the cheek as goodbye. Hoshi hoped his jealous grimace wasn't noticed by you.

You furrowed your brows at his sudden departure, but made no comment about it otherwise.

"Okay, Kwannie. Call me later tonight?"

"Sure," he agreed, then turning to Soonyoung, "Send me some of those videos," he said as one last statement before leaving.

"Oh!" you exclaimed, "Send me them too? Here, I'll give you my KakaoTalk," you reached out your hand to silently ask him to hand you his phone as you walked over to his side.

Fuck. Your number? He was going to have your personal contact info on his phone?

Granted, he could've just asked Seungkwan or one of the other guys for your number, but he wanted to get it out of your own volition. And now he was currently standing next to you, faces far too close as you both leaned down to look at his phone screen watching you type in your info. He could've sworn you leaned even closer when you heard him gulp, but it was probably just wishful thinking.

"Here," you said when you were finally done, handing him his phone back – and gracing his hand with your own in the process, a detail Soonyoung found extremely important to fixate on.

He thanked you with a nod, putting the phone away and wracking his brain to think of anything he could possibly say to extend your time together. With Seungkwan around, he hadn't even had the chance to talk to you at all.

"Hey," you spoke up before he could, "We're announcing our comeback next week- oh, uh, don't tell anyone, by the way," you giggled at your own interjection, "Do you think maybe you'd like to do our choreo with me for a TikTok?", you asked, "You know, just the two of us?"

The last question really threw him off guard. But what threw him off guard even more was the look you gave him afterward. Your eyebrows were lifted and your front teeth were softly biting onto the plush of your bottom lip. It was suggestive, but not too obvious. Soonyoung was unsure of how to read it, but considering the fact that he was already head over heels for you, the mere implication of your gaze on him had his heart accelerating and his head inflating like a balloon.

"O-oh, yes. I- Yes. We can totally do that," he agreed far too enthusiastically, "You can just call me- or- or text me, if that's better for you," he stammered.

You bit your lip again, but this time it was to try and fail to hold in a giggle. Nodding at him, you thanked him, letting him know you'd be contacting him soon.

"Let me know when the TikTok gets posted, okay?", you said afterwards.

"It'll probably get posted today or tomorrow. You'll see it on the official account-"

You interrupted him, "Text me either way, yeah?", you spoke again, now in a slightly more direct way, giving him a look that made him realize you were conveying some sort of hint to him.

He wasn't sure what you meant by this, but he nodded dumbly at you, not willing to pass up an opportunity to talk to you again. This was when the two of you finally bid your goodbyes, with you catching him off guard by offering him a quick hug before walking him out of your practice room.

Slightly dumbfounded, Soonyoung slowly walked away, heading towards the elevator through which he'd come in less than thirty minutes ago, trying to process what'd happened during the last five minutes of his visit.

Sometimes he hated how easy it was for things to fly over his head, but there was just absolutely no way you'd been flirting with him just now, was there? You were friendly, as you always were, but the very subtle looks and the suggestion of texting each other – and even hanging out alone next time – gave him the tiniest of hopes that maybe you'd taken an interest to him.

He decided to shrug this off for now, entirely too sure that there'd be no way for you to flirt with him, much less like him when he was always such a stammering mess around you.

Within a day, the TikTok had been posted, garnering excited reactions from fans who enjoyed both of your groups. Unlike the endless times before, you had not done the dance challenge with Seungkwan but also with Hoshi, causing a bit of extra excitement among both of your fans. This made Soonyoung giddier than he'd like to admit. Knowing your fans enjoyed seeing you together made him smile far too hard.

As promised, he knew he had to text you about the TikTok. It was likely you'd already seen it, as it'd already been a few hours since its release. However, Soonyoung was not about to miss the opportunity to start a thread of communication with you. This would be the first step to consistent communication with you (or so he hoped).

After mulling over it for a few hours, he landed on a simple text, one that did not showcase his excitement to be speaking to you – Jeonghan had said that that might scare you away – but simply informed you of the release of the TikTok.

hey, it's hoshi :)

the video got posted on seventeen's official account. the fans really like it ㅋㅋ here's the link

[TikTok link]

Surprisingly, you had responded quite quickly, making Soonyoung somehow fall even more enamored with you by the way you texted.

thank uuu hoshi nim !!!!

we look so good omg :D

i'll let u know when we can do my group's tiktok okay ? ill see u soon !!! <3

It'd be odd for any other guy to sigh so adoringly at their phone at such simple messages, but none of the guys gave him too much shit for how often he stared at your messages with awe in his eyes. You just sounded so enthusiastic to speak to him, and- Okay, he knew he was overthinking it. You were probably just someone who conveyed their emotions through text (he was too!!!). He just liked knowing that he was now somewhere in your KakaoTalk, ready for any time you wanted to message him. And that heart? He was swooning over the simple gesture, but that was something he couldn't get to without going on ten different tangents about how much he liked you (His friends had already heard them all).

~

"Oh, really? She wants to see you again?", asked Seungkwan later that same day upon hearing that you'd asked Soonyoung to meet later on to record alone.

It was the usual time for dance practice, though currently it was just a few of the members in the practice room as they waited for the rest to show up. These moments would usually be taken up by life updates on each other or by a few overly-competitive rounds of badminton.

"Hold on. Y/N?," asked Chan who just happened to be walking in, "Congrats, man. You've been crushing on her since forever," he gave him a pat on the back in encouragement, joining in on the conversation.

Seungkwan pouted to himself, "She asked you? She always asks me," he didn't seem actually sad, but just whiny as usual.

"C'mon, Kwannie. Give them some time alone. It's young love," interjected Jeonghan, always the proudly designated Soonyoung-supporter.

"Hah," Soonyoung chuckled shyly, looking down, "It's nothing. It's not like I asked her out or anything," he added.

"Well, this is your chance," encouraged Joshua, who had previously been toying with a racket to offer up a round of badminton to the guys, "She gave you her number completely unprovoked. You just need to open up a bit and let her get to know you."

It was all good advice. Great, even. Except that Soonyoung was an anomaly of a guy. Despite how outgoing he seemed to everyone around him (even his fans), he was actually quite shy and reserved when it came to people he wasn't familiar with. You being someone he didn't know too personally and his years-long crush simply did not help matters.

"Yeah, I'll try, just- Fuck, she makes me so nervous. I don't wanna be too obvious," he expressed one of his many concerns.

"Too late," Seungkwan murmured lowly, looking away to act as if he hadn't said anything.

"What do you mean ...," asked Soonyoung with widened eyes.

"Dude, you kept staring at her the whole time we were dancing. And every time she tried to speak to you, you stumbled over your words like an idiot. If she didn't clock that you liked her in those twenty minutes, then she's an idiot – and I'm saying this as her best friend," rambled Seungkwan, letting his friend in on how his interaction with you looked from a third person's point of view.

Soonyoung liked to think that he had enough self-awareness to assess how he was perceived by others. Realistically, however, he knew he lacked the skill to hold in his emotions like the average person. He had fears of being too obvious whilst in your presence, so knowing that he had been too blatantly enamored by you made him cringe internally. The last thing he wanted was to embarrass himself in front of you.

"Fuck, does she-"

"No, I don't think she actually knows. She probably just thinks you're a weirdo," reassured Seungkwan with a sigh, "But isn't that the goal? I mean, for her to know you like her?"

"Yeah, but I have to swoop her off her feet, not make her think I'm some loser who's obsessed with her – I mean, I am, but she doesn't need to know that yet," Soonyoung rambled exasperated.

Joshua, Jeonghan and Chan snickered all at once, finding their friend's ridiculous thought process to be far too funny. As much as they were rooting for him to finally ask you out, watching his strange way of coursing through his crush was something they treasured as a form of entertainment and would be sad to let go off anywhere in the near future. But despite that, they continued their encouragement to get the boy to finally get your sights on him.

"So, what's your plan? Other than pestering me to get her to hang out with you – which, by the way, clearly didn't work," deadpanned Seungkwan.

"I'm just waiting for her to call me so we can do her TikTok challenge. Fuck, should I text her first?", he pondered out loud.

"She told me her comeback's this Friday, but her music video's already out" added Chan, making them all turn to him in question.

"You talk?", whined Hoshi.

Chan nodded slowly as if it were the most obvious thing, "Yeah, we're friends."

Joshua and Jeonghan cackled like hyenas at this, finding Soonyoung's shocked facial expression adorable.

"Am I the only one she's not friends with?!"

"Maybe if you hadn't actively avoided her for years-"

"I didn't mean to! I'm just shy!", he complained, hands lifted as he sighed in frustration, "But no longer! I'm texting her tonight, okay? Next time you see me, I'll be on my way to a situationship – or if luck goes my way, a relationship," he assured.

"Really? Are twenty minutes spent dancing going to make her fall for you? You already tried that, and it failed," deadpanned Seungkwan, "But, I'm rooting for you. Maybe this way you'll finally leave me alone."

That was good enough.

"Any pointers?", asked Soonyoung, "Any intel you guys can give me since you're apparently all part of the 'fuck Soonyoung' club?"

"Just don't do anything stupid," said Seungkwan, all the other boys nodding along.

That was easy enough.

It was one day later that Soonyoung received a text from you, entailing the time and place in which you'd be needing his presence to record a short TikTok video for your group's newest comeback. As luck may have had it, since your comebacks were so close together, you were attending a music show on the same day. This meant that Seventeen would perform right after your group.

The plan was to meet in the backroom in between shootings, just before your group left to their next schedule of the day. Even if it meant that Soonyoung would get no time to prepare for his own performance, he was confident enough he didn't need the extra practice – plus, meeting up with you took priority in his mind.

On the day of the comeback show, Soonyoung felt nerves he hadn't experienced in years. He had prepared for you as much as he could, taking time out of his day to practice your choreo as soon as your group's music video came out in preparation for your meeting. Dumbly enough, he didn't bother to ask you which part you needed for your TikTok, opting to learn the whole thing instead. He had also asked his stylist to go a little extra hard with his hair and makeup (the thought made him feel like a teenager, but he just wanted to look extra good for you).

It was only some time upon his arrival to the venue that he received a text from you asking for his presence.

meet me in the back ? ;)

The blush that arose from his cheeks couldn't be helped.

The two of you had only texted a handful of times since you'd first given him your number a few days ago, but he always found himself blushing and kicking his feet when you'd text him using your adorable emojis. In his delusional mind, he was the only one you sent those cute hearts and smileys to.

With a nervous intake of breath, Soonyoung walked over to the back of the building – an area idols would sometimes visit for a smoke or to hang out behind anyone's view (even staff). He looked around, finding you leaning against the stairs as you waited for him.

You were still wearing that pretty outfit you had worn during your group's performance (which soonyoung made sure to watch as soon as he arrived). It was adorable, but also dangerous for someone like Hoshi. Donning a cute set that consisted of a pink cropped top with a matching fluffy mini-skirt, your look made Soonyoung almost salivate. You were the perfect mixture of adorable and sexy, reminding him all over again why he had first developed a crush on you (that, and the million other reasons).

Upon spotting him, your face lit up, walking over to him with pep in your step, clearly excited to see him (God, take him now).

"Hoshi-Nim!", you called out excitedly, rushing over to his side and offering him a side hug (Fuck).

Hesitantly returning it, he gave you a shy smile and looked down, too timid to hold eye contact for too long. Noticing this, you giggled.

"Is this a bad time, or do you need to go-"

"No! Seventeen's performance isn't until twenty minutes, so I'm good," he interrupted.

"Okay, great. Uh, do you think you'll be able to learn the dance in that time?"

"Oh, I already learned it," he said surprisingly nonchalantly.

"Huh? What? Like, the whole thing?", you asked incredulously.

Scratching the back of his neck in bashfulness, he nodded, "Yeah, uh, just wanted to save you the trouble?", he chuckled breathlessly.

Your eyes widened as did your smile, furrowing your eyebrows at the unnecessary (but highly admirable) amount of effort Hoshi had put into the basic concept of learning what was supposed to be a short TikTok dance for you.

"God, you learned my whole choreo while doing your group's own comeback? That's ... Wow, that's insane, Hoshi-Nim," you praised in disbelief, "You really didn't have to do that."

Soonyoung couldn't lie. He was reeling at the praise. You seemed both surprised and impressed, which were both reactions he wished to draw out of you more often. Sadly, he felt overwhelmed by the attention you were giving him, so the most response he could give you were shy nods and bashful smiles.

Suddenly, you spoke up again, "Actually, Hoshi-Nim, I, uh, I need help with something else, if that's okay?", you looked up at him with a shy smile, reaching out for his hand.

He nodded numbly, surprised at the request for his hand but knowing he'd agree to anything you asked without even needing to know what it was.

Grabbing his hand, you turned around and began leading him somewhere, "It'll just take a moment, I promise. Just ... just really need your help," you sounded breathless, leading him to believe this must've been far more important than the dance. This made Soonyoung the more willing to help you.

Before arriving to your destination, you hesitantly looked back at him as you both walked over to a closed door, Hoshi unknowing of what you needed from him. It appeared as if you were in distress, pondering about something, but saying nothing to him.

Leading him to a small and empty waiting room in the back, you pulled him in, closing the door behind you before turning to him. Before he could verbalize his curiosity, you jumped at him, pulling him down as you stood on your tippy toes and connected your lips in a frantic kiss.

His hair was grabbed at and pulled at in ways that had his eyes rolling. His tongue was sucked at and lips were nibbled at, pulling breathy whines out of him. The quickness in which he fell into the kiss was a bit ridiculous, not even bothering to question what was happening before whining into your mouth and enclosing his arms around you, pulling you even closer.

Pathetic breaths of your name escaped his lips and entered yours. He found himself unable to stop himself from following your every whim, molding his body to your own as you pulled him closer and took all you needed from his lips.

His mind could not process what was happening, so he let his body take the wheel and seek every bit of pleasure he could from yours. His hands were too timid to feel you up the way his body ached to, so he simply let them lay limp on your hips, squeezing any time your kiss became particularly nasty that he couldn't help but react.

Suddenly you began pulling away, pulling a high-pitched whine from his lips as he attempted to follow you, breathing out a tiny 'please' when your tongue came out to give his lips one last swipe.

"Fuck, I'm sorry, I-", you began, "I just- Was that too much? Fuck, I should've asked-"

He shook his head almost aggressively, "N-no, you can do whatever you want! That's- It's totally fine. You don't have to ask, just- Fuck, never ask."

Your hands went up to caress at his cheeks, distress still in your eyes, "I just- I know that you like me, and I just couldn't hold back anymore," you gulped, "You're just so sweet and, shit, the fact that you like me so much makes me- God, I can't think," you rambled.

"You ... you knew? I- How? Did I- Was I so obvious?", he gaped at you, though did not react too much as he did not want to cause you to take your hands off him (He needed your hands on him).

You giggled a bit, "Well, yes, and, uh," you winced in anticipation for your next statement, "Kwannie might've let it slip while we were drunk a few months ago ..."

"He what?!"

"He didn't realize! I don't think he even knows he did it," you defended your friend, "Plus, it's a good thing, since, you know," you smiled at him, hands going from his cheeks to the back of his head, toying with the hair there, "Now I can have some fun with you ..."

The atmosphere changed entirely for Hoshi when you said those words. The lust was back in your eyes and he completely mirrored it – though a little more sheepishly.

"Oh, I ..." he chuckled shyly, "You ... Fuck, you want to have fun with me?"

You nodded, biting your lip.

"W-what type of fun?", he blinked, breathless.

"Can I show you?"

"Fuck, p-please ..."

Your proud smile was the last thing he saw before you closed the gap once more, trapping his lips in another heady kiss. Bonelessly, he followed your rhythm, though in a much more timid manner. While your hands felt and pulled at every inch they liked, his own remained respectfully on your hips. Despite how much his carnal side wanted to take over, he was in such absolute awe of you he couldn't bring himself to think straight and act.

Luckily for him, you were far more proactive than him.

Grabbing onto his rigid hands, you led them down to your ass, encouraging him to feel you up as you had been doing to his chest and hair. At this, he moaned into your mouth, hands now achieving a newfound confidence, beginning to feel you up all over. His hands went over and under your fluffy skirt, occasionally going up to squeeze at your breasts. His actions were rewarded by breathy sighs of his name into his lips, something which he had only ever dreamed about before.

"Soonie ...", you breathed against his mouth, "Is it okay if I call you that? Soonie?"

"Call me anything you want, just- don't stop kissing me," he groaned, making a beeline right back to your lips.

"But ..." you barely managed to get out as his lips chased your own needily, "I wanna- wanna suck your dick," you moaned.

Fuck.

His brain stopped computing for a moment. His heart stopped and his knees buckled. No part of his being worked accordingly as he attempted to process a visual of what you'd just said.

You on your knees, his dick in mouth?

It was borderline pathetic the way in which he moaned into your lips, attacking you with a wet and wanton kiss that could barely meet your lips as he nodded desperately and panted a chorus of 'yesyesyesyesyes' into your mouth.

You found him entertaining, or so it seemed going by your giggle in response before dropping down to your knees. Undoing his performance outfit, you pulled down his pants just enough, only to find an achingly hard cock.

"Just from kissing?" you teased with another wicked giggle as you began to put him in hand.

"I'm so fucking obsessed with you," he whined without thinking, "I'd get hard from you just looking at me."

Soonyoung could feel the shudder that passed through your body at his words.

Oh. You liked his desperation? His pathetic want for you? Luckily for you, Soonyoung had an endless amount of desperation ready to feed you with.

"Tell me more," you said before tilting his cock towards your mouth, beginning to teasingly kitten-lick at the tip.

Now it was his turn to shudder, visibly shaking at the barely-there contact.

"You- you're so fucking perfect ..." he breathed as you continued to lick at him, "I think about you all the time, I- Just have you on my mind every day," he revealed.

"And what do you think about?", you pondered out loud, "This?", you asked before enveloping him in your lips, suckling at the tip of his cock.

"T- think, f-fuck- Think about how pretty you are ... How talented and funny, and- and how much I wanna impress you," he panted out truthfully, whining when he turned to look down at you and found your drooling face staring back up at him as your eyebrows scrunched up in effort.

The sight only made him cry out harder, churning out even more embarrassing confessions.

"A-and I think about how h-happy I could make you ... I'd give you everything and ... and I'd make you feel so fucking good ..." he panted out.

You only went deeper on his cock at the slight allusion, gagging around him with purpose in your eyes. His strangled gasp in response caused you to repeat this movement repeatedly as your hands went up to toy at his balls, stimulating him far too much for a guy who had stupidly assumed all he'd be doing with you today would be dancing.

"Please ... please, can I cum? I need- need to cum. Can't hold it back, y-you're so fucking pretty," his hands wrapped even harder around your hair, destroying the well-crafted hairdo your stylists must've taken an hour orchestrating.

Finally pulling away for air, you gasped to take in as much air as possible before licking at him again in order to slowly regain your breath.

"Just one more minute, Soonie? Be good and wait, yeah?," you murmured, "Tell me what else you've been thinking about, baby. Then I'll let you cum," you requested before wrapping your lips around him again.

Nodding with an empty head, he did as you instructed, wanting nothing more than to cum (even though it was embarrassingly fast).

"Thin-think about how fucking sexy you look on stage, how ... how confident a-and sure of yourself you are ... N-no one's ever made me feel this way. So nervous when you're around. Can't think, can't breathe, can't- oh, oh, fuck. Please, I- F-fuck ..." his rambles detailing his infatuation were halted by your sudden increase of speed in movements, causing his orgasm to break through without any warning.

Soonyoung had no time to feel embarrassed over how little he'd lasted with your mouth around his dick when you'd so enthusiastically continued to suck at him throughout his orgasm, humming at every drop you swallowed.

Crying out in sensitivity (both at the feeling and sight), Soonyoung's teary eyes met your own, sniffling as you finally pulled yourself away from him and stood up to attempt and meet his height again. Wordlessly, you wiped at the few lone tears that strayed away due to the suden impact of his orgasm, kissing him softly as you did so.

He wantonly licked into your mouth, whining when he was able to taste himself in your tongue. Continuing to kiss you, he chased after your lips when you attempted to pull away multiple times, causing you both to chuckle breathlessly at each other.

"Was that what you hoped when you thought about me?", you asked whilst biting back a smile.

Nodding enthusiastically, he agreed, "That was perfect- you're perfect."

"Sorry if that was too much, I just-"

His hands went to hold at your arms, halting your speech, "No! Never apologize. You can do whatever you want to me. Always. Trust me," he insisted with a serious yet air-headed look in his eyes.

Giggling, you gave up on apologizing for having jumped him so suddenly just minutes ago.

"Wait, fuck!", he suddenly let out, "I have to be on stage in like five minutes. Shit, I need my hair redone and- oh, wait, we didn't get to do your TikTok. Do you wanna-"

"No, it's okay, Soonyoung. Go get ready. We can just meet up later for the video, okay?," you reassured him, leading him out of the room you'd cornered him in and beginning to walk towards where he needed to be, with you having to push him along, as he was too distracted.

"Yeah, okay. Great," he began walking away from you before turning back, "Can- Can I call you? Later, I mean?", he cringed internally at how not smooth that was.

You giggled at him again, nodding, "Yes, Soonyoung. You can call me any time. Good luck with your stage," you took a few steps and planted a kiss on his cheek, finally walking away for real after that.

Leaving a wordless Soonyoung behind, he finally began processing what had just happened, gulping at the thought.

Had he really just hooked up with you in a lone room buried in the basement floor of Inkigayo?

Had he really confessed to his crush whilst she knelt before him, cock in mouth and watery eyes staring up at him?

Fuck, how was he supposed to perform now?

"No way."

"You're lying. There's literally no way that happened."

"She let you hit?!"

"Well, uh, not exactly," Soonyoung scratched the back of his head awkwardly at all the attention he was suddenly receiving from his friends.

As the loudmouth he was known to be, he had made the mistake of airing out what had happened between the two of you earlier that day. After a few takes of their comeback performance, his group and staff headed back to Hybe, where Soonyoung and some of his members arrived to practice.

Although Soonyoung had not shared the explicit details of what had happened, – nor had he meant to in the first place – he had made the mistake of implied that you had done something. Okay, yeah, maybe he did use the word 'hooked up' without realizing the implications it could have. Could he be blamed? He was still on a high from you even giving him the time of day!

"What happened, exactly?", asked Seungkwan with a groan. Two minutes into the conversation and he was already fed up of Soonyoung. The usual.

"I'm not sure if I should say," he started.

No part of him wanted to air you out for any promiscuous activities you may take part in – even if they had been with him. He also did not want to disrespect your trust. Seungkwan was your best friend, though, so he'd know eventually. Right?

"Dude, just spit it out!", demanded Seokmin, yet another member who had been let in on the situation at some point.

"We kissed ... and uh, other things ... maybe," he added after a pause, almost unable to hide his sheepish smile at the memory.

Jeonghan was the first to react, followed by Joshua. Both their eyes widened as they approached Soonyoung to dap him up, hyping him for his accomplishment.

"Okay, no more details, please. I don't want to think about my best friend in that way," cringed Seungkwan, still offering Soonyoung a congratulatory pat in the back whilst sporting a disgusted grimace.

"And then what happened?", asked Chan, cocking his head to the side.

"Then I had to leave to perform."

Then there was a short pause.

"Dude!"

"Are you serious?"

"You just left??"

They all took turns in shifting the atmosphere to one of annoyance rather than congratulating him like they had just been doing.

"She told me to leave," he clarified quickly, "Fuck, should I call her? I said I would. What should I say? What do you say after your crush sucks the life out of you in a basement? Shit, should I have stopped her?", he rambled with questions, a worried look in his eye.

"First of all, chill," started Seungkwan, "second of all, if she did it, it was because she wanted to. I know her, she would've told you to fuck off if she didn't like you. Just be a man, for once, and call her," he reprimanded.

"Fuck, okay, yeah. I'll call her – now. I'll call her right now," he nodded decisively, beginning to gather his things to leave, "Uh, you guys can practice without me for today. Oh, and Seungkwan?", he added before leaving.

"What?"

"I owe you one!", he said with zero context as to what he was referring to, leaving a confused Seungkwan behind to ponder what he had meant.

Maybe one day he'd remember to formally thank his friend for accidentally confessing to his crush on his behalf, but for now his mind was muddled solely with thoughts of you and calling you to see if maybe you'd be willing to see him again as soon as possible. Today, maybe? He needed to confess to you formally, not as he pathetically came in your mouth before leaving you to perform.

~

"Hello?"

"You picked up! Okay, good. Hi."

"You know, you're way less smooth than I thought," you laughed.

"Are you saying I have no rizz?", he pouted through the phone.

"Maybe. Depends what you're calling me for?", your tone shifted to a more suggestive tone.

"Fuck, please walk me through this. I have no idea how to talk to you," whined Soonyoung, deciding to lay all cards on the table. You already knew he was pathetically into you, what harm could it bring?

You hummed as you pondered what he said, clicking your tongue, "When are you free?"

"For you? Any time," he replied with a quickness.

"So, tonight?"

"Yes," he said without a second thought.

"Shit. You really like me, huh?"

"So fucking much. I could go on about it forever. Just, you know, maybe not while you're making me lose my mind on some public basement," he laughed airily, wincing internally at how pathetic he must've sounded earlier that day.

"Yeah? Wanna come over and tell me more about it?", you dared.

"Please text me your address and I'll be there within the next hour," he practically pleaded. On further thought, he still sounded pathetic while speaking to you. Maybe some things just could not be helped.

"I'll see you here at ten, okay?" you made a kissy sound to him and hung up before he could say anything else, sending him a text with your address just moments later.

Soonyoung sighed as he let himself slouch back on the couch he'd been sitting on, still finding himself at his company's building, as the need to call you was too big for him to arrive home before doing so. For now, he'd be able to make a stop home before heading over to your place. It was still early and he needed to bathe and wash and pamper himself to the best of his ability (Just in case his visit was going to be as suggestive as your voice had been on the call).

Having a chance to think over the past day on his way to his home, he realized that his debilitating shyness around you had died off the moment you kissed him, instead becoming a newfound sense of neediness he didn't know he had in him. He accepted it – specially since you seemed to like it. However, he had hopes that he'd be able to talk to you a bit – and maybe finally get to ask you out –tonight at your place.

From what Seungkwan had said (along with the way you interacted with him), he believed there was a chance you liked him back. You wouldn't have kissed him (nor given him the head of his life) if you didn't like him at least a bit. You also wouldn't laugh so much while talking to him (nor smile at him so often) if you didn't feel anything for him.

These were his thoughts and hopes throughout the night as he readied himself for you.

~

A few hours later and he now found himself in front of your gated home. It had taken some effort to get here, seeing as it was rare for you to give out your address (As a fellow idol, he understood), but he was still on time.

He knew that the cool thing to do would've been to arrive a little late or maybe even skip it altogether to get your curiosity about him to heighten more, but he was too excited to see you to even think about playing any games. With some treats in hand (which he knew you liked, as per Seungkwan's input), he rang your doorbell and awaited your arrival.

Upon seeing you, he gulped. You weren't wearing anything particularly racy – just some loungewear. Unfortunately for Soonyoung, he had a thing for you in loungewear, apparently. You donned a white tank top and some sweats, which somehow managed to contour your body perfectly for his viewing. The comfort that radiated from you also made Soonyoung feel a mixture of softness and want for you. His feelings for you at the moment were complicated – all he knew was that he wanted you; whether that was in a pure or filthy way, he wasn't sure.

"Hi," was all he could bring himself to say.

"Hi, Soonyoung. Come in?", you moved to the side to let him in.

He walked in, taking in your place and how much of you it contained. Or well, that's what he planned to do until you grabbed his hand and prevented his wandering, leading him over to a large couch in what he assumed to be your living room.

Wordlessly, you took the treats from his hands and sat him down decisively, immediately going to straddle him and placing your hands on his shoulders. He was intimidated by your straightforwardness, but immediately too into it, whining into your lips the mere moment your mouths connected. His hands were less timid this time around, holding onto your hips and attempting to pull you closer to him.

"Fuck, I've wanted you all day," you sighed into his lips.

"I've wanted you for years," he breathed against your own, following your lips any second they were away from his.

"Are you gonna show me?"

"Yes, fuck. I'll do anything you want, however you want," he promised as your lips went down to his neck, sighing at every kiss against his skin.

"Fuck, why did you wear so many clothes?", you groaned at the jacket that was in your way, also referring to the thick jeans he was currently sporting under you.

"I- I thought we were just going to watch a movie or something," he explained shyly.

As stupid as it sounded the second he said it, he truly was not expecting you to jump him for a second time in the same day. He had truly expected the two of you to talk or simply hang out before your next sexual encounter. However, he was unable to find any complaints regarding his current situation.

His statement must've given you some sort of reaction, as you disconnected your lips from his neck and leaned back to face him with a look of awe in your eyes.

"Soonie, fuck, you're too cute," you groaned, hand going up to his cheek as your thumb caressed the skin there, "You almost make me feel bad for wanting you so bad," you muttered before going back to your regular volume of voice, "I promise we'll talk, baby. I just- I've been wet since I sucked you off today," you explained, giving him no time to respond before kissing him again.

The couch you were currently sitting on squeaked at the brand new movement above it as you began softly grinding against Soonyoung, damning any layers in between you.

"I- I wanted to return the favor, I swear!", he managed to pant out, mind leaving him a little more every time your hips connected with his, "I had to go, I didn't- I didn't mean to leave you like that," explained in deep breaths.

"I know, Soonie. Which is why you're going to make it up to me. Right, baby?," you coo'd against his lips, licking at them when he pouted and nodded in response.

Only a few more moments of making out and dry humping took place before you began growing restless above him, whimpering any time your cunt would grace against the harsh button of his jeans. Your sweats were thin enough for Soonyoung to know that the mutual humping of his hips must've been getting you off (at least going off by the increasingly high cries you were breathing into his mouth).

"I want you to fuck me," you suddenly said when you pulled back for air, messily getting off his lap and dragging him with you, hard dick standing up and all.

Almost robotically, he followed you to your room, surprised when you sat down this time, seemingly directing for him to be on top. Before he could begin to crawl over you, however, you stopped him with a palm to his chest, nodding at him to take off his clothes.

"Clothes off, baby. I'll take mine off too."

He stood frozen for a second at the mention of you getting undressed, staring down at you as you nonchalantly threw off every item, leaving you fully naked in front of him as you sat back on the edge of the bed.

"Soonie? Clothes?", you asked.

"O-oh, right," he stammered, eyes still not leaving your breasts.

Despite having had no higher education during his twenties, he was sure he could write a whole dissertation on every curve of your body. Every freckle and line of your skin had him too distracted to take off his clothes without tripping every few seconds. You might've been giggling at the sight, he wasn't too sure since his eyes, ears, and entire mind were in tune to the view from your shoulders and below.

Finally undressed, he hesitantly walked over to your spot on the bed, only to be beat by you when you suddenly crawled further on the bed, somehow conjuring a condom from under your pillow as you turned around and set yourself in all fours, presenting him with your- oh fuck.

Soonyoung could've sworn he lost his mind the moment you arched your back just a little more as he approached you, almost dropping to his knees at the sight. He felt like an animal in heat, while also having an understanding of what it must be like to be a starving man in search of his next meal. His body was begging him to grab that condom and insert himself as deep in you as it was humanly possible, hammering into you until he cried at the stimulation.

It was the weaker part of him, however, that won.

His shaky hands reached for the condom you'd placed on the highest point of your back, struggling to put it in due to the sheer need running through his veins. After that, his hands finally went to your bare hips, feeling them up and down in absolute awe. One of his hands came to the arch of your back, toying with the thought of pressing it even lower and audibly groaning when you actually followed through and ended up pressing your ass even further against him.

"It's stressing me out how badly I want you," he cried out, sniffling, "I'm going to burst the moment I'm inside you," he verbalized his fear.

"Me too, Soonie ..." you sighed, "Been waiting for you all day ... Need you to fuck me already," you practically pleaded. Pleaded, as in pleading for him. He was sure you wanted him dead.

Nodding to himself, he began lining himself up, unable to resist the temptation to let his tip toy at your folds despite how such sensation made his eyes roll back in pleasure. His groans got louder at your own reaction – even more pleas of his name to finally fuck you.

Unable to hold back any longer, Soonyoung finally penetrated you, instantly regretting it, as he knew there would be no way for him to ever feel such pleasure ever again.

It was mixture of his feelings for you paired by the natural desperation he felt at having all these years of anticipation come to a close. Having dreamt about you for countless nights, he'd torture himself with unachievable thoughts of you. Now that he finally had you, pretty and stuffed under him, his mind could not process how tight and hot and wet you felt around him.

"It's so good, oh, fuck, it's so- you feel so fucking good," he panted out in strangled breaths, beginning to hump against your ass.

The slaps of his hips against your ass sounded so filthy to him in that moment, but it only heightened his drive even more. He was known to have a tiger's stamina for a reason.

"Mphm, t-tell me how it feels," he pleaded after some moments of not hearing much from you. Suddenly a wail released from your lips, making his cock twitch inside you at the sound.

"C-can't, it's too good. So big, fuck", you gasped intermittently.

"Right? Made for me ... Right? She's just for me, isn't she? So wet and tight for me," he knew that maybe personifying your pussy mid sex could be a turn off for some people, but was pleased when the sudden tightness of your pussy confirmed that he'd been correct in assessing you – you were a freak just like him.

"She needs more, Soonie," you begged.

How was he to deny you when you'd been so good? When you were the girl of his dreams, granting him access to the pussy that starred every single one of his filthiest dreams for years?

His hips sped up, likely bruising your ass with the intensity of the skin slapping. You had no complaints, though, continuing to occasionally cry out his name accompanied by babbles.

He was not doing any better, practically drooling both at the sight and feeling of you.

"Tell me you like me," he suddenly pleaded, knowing his orgasm wad approaching, "Please."

"So much, Soonie. So- so sweet for me. Like you so much," you confirmed in between hiccups of pleasure.

"Oh, fuck, thank God," he sighed in relief, hips going even harder at the confirmation of you liking him back. This meant that he'd get to have you again and again, and not only that, but he'd also get to hold your hand and put a heart next to your contact name and bring you over to meet his mom and-

"I'm so close, Soonie," you interrupted with the prettiest breath of desperation Soonyoung had ever heard.

"S-say it again," he cried, using his last efforts to prolong his orgasm long enough to achieve yours before he finally broke down.

"I like you s-so fucking much, Soonyoung," you repeated, "You're so handsome and sweet, and- and you like me so much," you explained in between gasps every time his hips would hit that spongy spot inside you that had your eyes rolling back.

Every word went straight to his cock, breaking him and bringing forth his orgasm sooner than he had anticipated. In sheer desperation, his hand went under you, rapidly toying at your swollen bud in order to get you there with him. There was no way he was going to cum without you twice in a single day.

Crying out uncontrollably, he became a senseless mess, hips having lost all their rhythm and nonsensical babbles filled with praise leaving his lips. He hadn't realized your orgasm had arrived until he felt you tighten up impossibly tightly around him, having been too into his own to notice. Regardless, his inner instinct commanded him to buck into you as you went through your high, ignoring any sensibility he may have felt. Your pleasure was his priority, now and from then on.

"P-please, Soonie, it's too much, it's- Oh, fuck. Like that. Just like that, Ah!", you moaned for him up until your arms gave out, forcing you to fall against the bed and bury your head in the sheets, muffling every whimper Soonyoung dreaded to miss.

He reasoned it was fine. Now that he knew you liked him back, he'd be able to draw orgasm after orgasm out of you. A sinister part of him was bugging at him to flip you over as soon as your orgasm subsided and force at least three more out of you as he buried his face between your legs, but he didn't want to scare you off with his sick addiction to you just yet.

That, and the fact that his mind was only seconds from melting away as your cunt insisted on sucking him in, disregarding how sensitive his cock was. The only thought in his mind at the moment was constant silent praise to your cunt and to yourself for having allowed him access to your bare body.

"Shit .... God, I really wasn't expecting that," you panted out after your orgasm had ended, gasping when he finally pulled out without warning, "You're kind of insane for someone so shy," you added as you caught your breath.

Chuckling as he helped you lay on your back, he reached over to some tissues on your end table and cleaned you up a bit, proceeding to remove his condom and getting up to throw it out along with the tissues. When he made it back to the bed, you were already laying under the covers, laying on your side and staring up at him with a suggestive smile.

Giggling at you, he giddily got under the covers. It was insanely hard to control the gigantic grin that took over his face when you instantly cuddled into him, letting him nuzzle his face into your breasts. If there was a heaven, this was it.

"Was I good?", he mumbled into your skin, not able to help himself in laying a few kisses here and there.

Your hand felt heavenly as it scratched at his scalp, allowing no space in between you as you cocooned him against you, legs wrapped around his waist holding him hostage.

"Are you serious? I think you broke me. Wasn't expecting you to be so ... horny."

"I'm always horny for you," he said nonchalantly.

It was amusing to him how easily he found comfort in you so soon. Only a few hours prior, he was a stuttering mess, yet he his nose was now deeply buried between your breasts, hands on your as as he held you against him, a feeling of ease floating around the room.

"Stop," you dragged out the vowel, laughing at how ridiculous his answers always were, "You're gonna make me like you even more."

"Not more than I like you," he rebutted, squeezing you closer in some sort of act of defiance, "Let me take you out?", he then asked, poking his face out of chest to stare up at you with wide eyes.

"I'd be an idiot to say no," you started, "Yes, Soonyoung. I've been waiting for you to ask," you added, scooting down on the bed so you could finally be face to face with the boy.

Gaping at you, he opened and closed his mouth a few times, "Oh my God. How long have you liked me?"

"Ever since Seungkwan told me, I've been trying to get you alone, but you'd always run away," you giggled, "Realizing you'd always avoid me because you liked me just made me so ... endeared. I was so happy when Kwan told me you wanted to do that TikTok dance with me," you revealed, kissing at his cheeks by the end of it.

Groaning, he nuzzled into your tits again, humming at the vibration of your body as you laughed at him again, "Fuck, I know I should've just asked you out. You just made me so nervous."

"Well, we can make up for the lost time now," you assured, cuddling into him, "You still need to take me out."

"I'll take you out every day," he hummed, "But first, I owe Seungkwan a drink," he added, drinking in yet another giggle from you.

to read short 3.4 word continuation you can go join my monthly tier on kofi or patreon!

content: sub!soonyoung, body worship, hoshi being down horrendously bad, afab reader, smut, oral (f receiving), penetrative sex, etc.

wc: 888 (teaser); 3425 (full drabble)

sneak peak:

"Can you get off my friend?"

"Do you mean my girlfriend?"

"It's been like half a day, stop saying that," groaned Seungkwan, staring you and Soonyoung down as you lounged around the hardwood floors of their practice room, cuddled up as if you hadn't just had your first date yesterday.

Soonyoung hadn't had the pleasure of knowing you on a personal level for too long (meaning he'd literally only made eye contact with you for the first time less than a week ago), but he had grasped your humor and boundaries pretty quickly. He knew you had no issue with how intense he was with his feelings for you, simply giggling along with him when he'd call you girlfriend or even wife. You said you found his crush cute and as a great ego-boost, specially since the crush was pretty much mutual (your words, by the way!!).

Seungkwan had been a mixture of elated and annoyed at the news of the two of you dating as soon as he'd seen you walk into the practice room hand by hand. Apparently you had texted him right after sleeping with Soonyoung, entailing your escapades together. Both mortified and proud of his friends now being privy to that information, Soonyoung took it as a welcome to begin parading you around as his girlfriend.

Your first date took place on the following day, manifesting itself as a simple at-home picnic late at night, followed by a sheepish 'first date kiss' at the end of the day and leading to this morning, where Soonyoung begged you to make a stop by his practice room before going to your own.

Your quick stop became a long visit as you became entertained by your friends and Soonyoung, who refused to let you leave. So now you found yourself being hogged by your boyfriend whilst your best friend feigned annoyance at the sight.

"Are you just not going to join us for practice?", Chan eventually approached you after having gone over the choreo a few times with some of the other members.

"I need to make up for lost time," whined Soonyoung, somehow nuzzling further into you.

"How are you not sick of him?", Minghao asked with a lighthearted eye-roll, kicking at Soonyoung's foot on his way by.

"Come on, he's cute," you spoke in defense of him, causing a muffled giggle to vibrate against your chest, a few pecks being left in his wake as a silent thank you.

"Then take him home, he's useless here! Some of us still need to practice," added Seungkwan, joining Minghao with an eye-roll of his own.

Turning to Soonyoung, you nudged him, "What do you say? Want my driver to give you a ride home?", you began leaning up against his wishes, giggling at the way he attempted to keep you cuddled up next to him, "C'mon, Soonie. Your members need to practice."

Getting up, you managed to drag him with you, turning to Seungkwan after the fact.

He pouted at you, giving you a hug goodbye as he usually liked to do, "You don't actually have to go, I was just being annoying," he said into your neck.

"It's fine, Kwannie. Soonyoung said he wanted to head home earlier, I don't know why he dragged me here anyway," you smiled at him before getting pulled away by your touchy boyfriend, who was sticking his tongue out at Kwan in defiance.

"He brought you to show you off," interjected Jeonghan, earning a scowl from Soonyoung.

"Anyways, never again! You can all keep your eyes," he turned to Seungkwan, "and hands off my girlfriend now. Thank you!", he stated like a petulant child, hand sliding down your arm and into your hand before beginning to pull you to the exit.

You giggled at his antics, waving goodbye to your friends before walking away with him.

"Hey," he called your attention once you were out in the hallway.

"Yeah?"

"Can I ... Can I come over to your place instead of having your driver drop me off?", he asked, uncharacteristically shy.

"Hmm? Yeah, of course. Is something wrong?"

He shook his head, "No! Just ... It's been two days since we, you know, and we've been spending all this time together. I didn't want to, like, scare you off or anything ..." he trailed off.

Although he was facing you, his eyes were avoiding your own, likely out of bashfulness. This made you crumble.

"Soonie," you coo'd, taking hold of his cheeks in your hands, "You're not scaring me off. I'm sorry I haven't been as forward about my feelings," you pouted at him, earning a pout in return, "How about you stay over tonight? We can have watch movies and have some fun together? I'll get you a ride back to the company tomorrow morning. What do you think?", your hands went to the back of his neck, lightly pulling at the treces from his mullet.

The slight suggestion to sex was there, but you hadn't meant to highlight it. You mostly just wanted to spend time with him; try to reassure him you enjoyed his company as much as he did yours.

He nodded enthusiastically, "Really? That sounds- that sounds fun," he practically reeled, following along without a second thought when you grabbed at his hand again, pulling him to the elevators.

...

find the 18+ continuation on kofi or patreon!

if you have trouble finding it on there, just let me know!!<3

[beloveds-embrace]

Can we please get that Duke König with the neglected Reader please Noona I am begging

The sun was beginning to set, painting the garden in hues of gold and pink. You sat alone on the stone bench you’d started occupying often, the cloak König had draped over your shoulders still providing its comforting weight. He had been here again today, as he often was now, seeking reasons to remain in the duchy far longer than any diplomatic duty you knew required.

He never came empty-handed, of course: a carefully chosen book, a delicately wrapped sweet, or today, a small bundle of lavender tied with a ribbon. Simple, yet thought out gifts. Gifts with you in mind.

König’s approach was always quiet, unobtrusive. He never demanded, never insisted, always leaving space for you to breathe, to speak if you wished- or to remain silent if you didn’t. His presence was unlike the others you were familiar with: gentle, steady, unhurried. You felt at peace around him, pressure not pressing down on your shoulders.

Today, he had sat beside you, his massive frame hunched to match your height, the soft timbre of his voice like a balm. “The Lavendel,” he’d started. “is for peace of mind. It helped my mother when her days felt too heavy. She would place it under her pillow.”

You hadn’t spoken much, but the corner of your lips had twitched upward, just slightly. That alone seemed to light his face with a kind of hope you hadn’t seen in years.

Inside the manor, the atmosphere was tense. John stood at the window, watching the garden from a distance. Kyle leaned against the wall, arms crossed, jaw tight. Johnny sat stiffly on the armrest of Simon’s chair, and the latter simoly stared at the crackling fire.

“She smiled at him today,” Kyle muttered, his voice heavy with bitterness and sorrow. “… Haven’t seen her smile like that in months.”

Johnny ran a hand through his hair, his throat working as he swallowed. “An’ he’s the one who gets it. Him.”

“He’s a better man than we’ve been,” Simon said bluntly, tone cutting and sharp, but not wrong. “And she deserves better.”

John turned from the window, ashen. “It doesn’t matter what we think. What matters is what she chooses.”

“And what if she chooses him?” Kyle asked, his voice sharp, though the anger wasn’t directed at John alone. “What then?” The rumors would be dangerous…

None of them had an answer.

Days slowly turned into weeks, and König’s presence became as steady as the rising sun even as you began recovering more. He never pushed, but he was always there- when you wandered the garden paths, when you sat by the fire in the library, even once when you’d stood on the balcony, staring out at the horizon as though searching for something you couldn’t name.

It wasn’t grand gestures that softened you, truthfully, but his quiet consistency. The way he listened, the way he treated you as though you were more than a shadow. The way he looked at you, not with pity, but with reverence. You were not an afterthought to him; you… existed. Really, trully, existed within his eyes and he treated you as such.

And slowly, against all odds, you began to bloom again. A soft laugh here, a tentative question there. König never rushed you, only offered his steady patience and a safe space for you and only you.

They could only watch from the distant edges, the weight of their regrets pressing down on them like suffocating fog.

They tried to tell themselves it wasn’t too late, that they could still fix this. But every time they saw you smile at König, every time you turned to him instead of them, the truth became harder to ignore. They had chances once- countless chances- to reach out to you. To make things right. And they had squandered every single one and now there was just… nothing left.

And König? He was just waiting to finish this deplomatic meetings so he could take you with him to his nation. The divorce process should be easy to deal with, and he’d finally free you from this miserable life.

You would want for nothing with him, and he will ensure not a single rumor of your unhappiness will ever spread again.

[vifilms]

NSFW EIGHTEEN+

all i seem to think about lately is religious!abby who grew up in a church all her life, always been told she needs to be with a man, marry one, build a life with one — owen in particular is who she’s been told to have. the arranged marriage she was basically grown into. 

in her early twenties, yet has she had the opportunity to be with another. a promise to her father, with the cross-necklace laying on her chest, she’s dedicated to being celibate until marriage. a pact practically bound by the blood of virgin mary, she believes in the sacred bond she has through faith with her god and savior, jesus christ. funnily enough, it’s the words she utters as you corner her in the bathroom. well…not so much as cornered, not with those curious blue eyes begging for something, anything to unburden her from the life abby feels trapped in. even if she knows it goes against everything she’s been taught, she doesn’t stop you from snaking your hand up her sunshine sunday dress, bright blue as it bring out her eyes, never leaving your actions. at first, your fingers only running along her folds, teasing the era until she’s dripping for you. there isn’t a doubt in your mind she’s never felt anything like this. 

the gold cross pendant a pawn in her mouth as if the only purpose it’s ever served is to be a prop until the cadence revealed itself. the truth of religion can be found on the tips of your fingers, the delicate touches on abby’s clit. abby lets her mind wander into the altar, the communion she takes, you’ll be the sin she begs for forgiveness next. seeping into her body like the blood pumping through her veins, the lone reason for her existence was for you. no god could compare to this, the trembling of her thighs, the moans she whispered in hopes not even her savior from above could hear her. 

is god really the way, the truth, and the light if she sees heaven through your eyes? 

“this is what you wanted isn’t it? someone to save you from the chains you call religion? let me set you free.” without a second more wasted, your tongue laps at her pussy, enjoying the way she can barely hold herself up. letting you claim something now has had the privilege of venturing. she would be shunned, ostracized from society if anyone knew the truth. 

truthfully, it’s an easy task. the angelic blonde so deprived of another’s touch she slithers in the hands of a snake, tasting the forbidden fruit for the first time. it’s quick, overwhelming when she comes undone, spilling her sweet nectar into your lips, hips moving uncontrollably as she fucks your face. knuckles bearing the color of winter snow, clutching onto her dress that rests at her toned abdomen as you swallow every last drop. 

stepping away from her, you grab a washcloth, running it under warm water, abby unable to move. impending doom washes over her guilty, and now sinful, heart. this never should have happened, the voice in her head repeats, the path of self righteousness was supposed to be hers but now she finds herself acquainted with the sinner and the snake, straying from the life of a discipline and discipleship. 

“hold your pretty dress for me. can’t get it wet, can we?” abby lifts her dress, clutching it as the warm wash rag gently cleans her, she feels your fingers dip inside her slightly, thorough as you clean up her cum. 

“i should get back out there.” abby shyly whispers. “my dad will be looking for me…and owen.” 

“right.” you toss the used rag on the countertop, “just one more thing.” 

with a passion laced in your tongue, you steal her breath away, lips locking either her pinky, pouting ones. abby can only assume the salty but even sweeter taste is her. whimpering as you squeeze her small tits through the pale blue dress, abby can’t help but grind against your legs between her legs, aching for something more. this time, you deny her of what she so desperately needs. 

“come and find me when you’re ready for a real fuck, princess.”

[lovedrruunk]

'A Fresh Start 𓏲*ੈ✩‧₊˚🎐[part i]

After choosing to break the cycle, Jinx [now Powder] tries to find her place in the countryside away from everything she once knew, drawn to someone who seems to embody everything she's wanted but never deserved. playlist!!!

The cottage was quiet, almost too quiet. She had chosen this place for that very reason after all. It was far from everything she used to know. Far from people who might recognize her, far from her past, and most importantly, far from the chaos she had attracted her whole life.

And yet, the quiet unsettled her.

Her days were simple now. Fixing up the cottage, teaching herself how to cook, tending to the purple and orange flowers she had no idea how to take care of. Simple things.

She only went into town when absolutely necessary, and even then, she kept her head down and her interactions short. People didn’t pry, but she saw the curiosity in their eyes. They looked at her like she was out of place, as if she wasn’t where she was supposed to be.

Except for you. You were different. Powder had noticed that right away.

The first time she saw you, she thought she was just seeing things.

You were at the edge of the farmer’s market, the sun shining down on you, your head tilted back, shoulders shaking as you laughed, your body so... unguarded. As if you weren't constantly looking over your shoulder waiting for something bad to happen. And for a moment, Powder forgot how to breathe. It wasn’t just the sound of your laughter or the warmth in your eyes when you spoke to someone who passed by. You had this way of moving like you belonged there, like you were part of the town in a way she couldn’t imagine ever being.

She’d only meant to grab a few supplies, slip in and out before anyone could try to talk to her. But then there you were, and she couldn’t look away.

She didn’t approach you. Told herself it was because she didn’t want to stand out, didn't want to risk anyone noticing her more than they already had. But deep down, she knew the truth. You made her feel small. The type of small you feel when you're around someone you look up to. A person who represents everything you want to be, someone you want to keep in your life forever. She couldn't just walk up to you so casually, not when you reminded her of everything she wasn't.

And yet she couldn't keep her distance. Because even though you left her feeling small, you also made her want to be something more. You made her hopeful. A feeling that had been so rare to come by nowadays. That maybe, just maybe one day she’d be as content as you were in this small warm town.

She wanted to know what it was like to feel so at ease, to be... satisfied. Not perfect, not terrible, but enough. And when she saw you, she saw how.

She started seeing you more often after that. Helping at the market, skipping down the dirt paths, stopping to pet the stray cats that wandered by, you took your time with everything you did, like there was no rush, like you had all the time in the world. It wasn’t long before she found herself looking for you whenever she came into town.

You were always smiling, always patient with everyone you spoke to. She couldn’t help but wonder if this is what being at peace looked like.

She couldn’t stop thinking about it. About you. About the way you seemed to fit so perfectly. It made her heart ache, this longing for something she wasn’t even sure she could have.

Sometimes, she’d catch herself lingering for too long, staring as you handed out fresh flowers to some kids or waved goodbye to one of the older shopkeepers. She’d duck her head, hoping you hadn’t noticed, but part of her wished you would.

Late at night when her little cottage was quiet and cold, she’d let her mind wander. She’d imagine herself laughing like you did, walking through the town with that same easy confidence. She’d picture you waving to her. Not out of politeness, but because you knew her. Because she was someone worth knowing, someone you wanted around.

It was a stupid thought. She knew that much. Someone like you, so open and kind didn’t belong anywhere near someone like her. But the thought still lingered, no matter how much she tried to push it away.

But for now, she stayed at a distance, quietly admiring you from afar. Wondering if one day she’d have the courage to find her own place in this town, preferably next to you.

Today, you were at the bakery, carrying a piece of warm bread to the counter. Powder stood just outside the window, watching as you handed a loaf to the shop owner with that signature smile that never seemed forced. Your hair caught the sunset through the glass, and her heart did this stupid little flip that she hated and loved at the same time.

You were everything. Bright, grounded, kind in a way that felt genuine. It was the way people lit up around you, how even the grumpiest of the townsfolk seemed to soften in your presence. Powder found herself wanting to be one of them.

But not today. Today was coming to an end. So as she watched you place your bread in your basket, she took one last glance at your face before turning on her heel, heading home.

At night, when the world was still, she tried to ignore how much of her thoughts were filled with you. She told herself it didn’t matter, that this small admiration was harmless.

But as the days passed, it grew harder to ignore. Harder to convince herself that watching from afar was enough.

. . .

You were standing near the fountain in the town square, chatting with a small group of neighbors. The market stalls around you were loud, filled with laughter and conversation. Powder stood by one of the lamp posts, her hands shoved deep into the pockets of her worn jacket, and her eyes glued to you.

You were smiling, of course, your face lit up with that same warmth that made her heart skip a beat. It was such a simple scene, one she had seen countless of times before. And yet, today, it felt different.

Her eyes darted to the little group you were standing with, chatting like it was the most natural thing in the world. The way you tilted your head, listening to some old guy ramble about whatever. So patient, so... nice. Powder’s chest clenched, hard.

She shouldn’t be here. This wasn’t her place. It was yours, with your calm smiles and easy conversations. Meanwhile, her hands were shaking just thinking about standing that close. People like her didn’t fit in with people like you. She was jagged edges and scrambled thoughts, and you were everything smooth and steady.

But still, her feet wouldn’t move. Not backward, not forward. Just... stuck, staring at the way you chuckled when one of the neighbors cracked some lame joke. She hated how much she wanted to be part of it, part of you.

The thought made her stomach flip in the worst way. She didn’t deserve that kind of peace, not after everything she’d done. Not after all the ways she’d ruined things.

But then you laughed again, and it hit her like a punch to the face. That sound, that easy, genuine laughter, it made her feel like maybe, just maybe, she could want something good for herself. Even if she didn’t deserve it. She wanted it more than anything.

She let out a shaky breath, every part of her screaming to go home and hide. She almost did. But then she looked up, and there you were, smiling, like the world wasn’t a mess. Like things could be easy if you let them.

Her feet began to move before she could stop them.

The crowd didn’t even notice her no whispers, no stares, just the usual hum of the town square. She kept walking, her heart pounding so loud it drowned out everything else.

And suddenly, she was right there. Close enough to smell your perfume, closer than she had ever been.

You turned your head towards her, mid-laugh.

She should’ve ran. She should’ve stayed away, kept pretending this wasn’t something she wanted.

But she didn’t.

Her voice was quiet, shaky, but it was hers.

“Hey.”

You blinked, surprised but not unkind, and Powder swore she saw your smile widen ever so slightly.

It wasn’t much. But it was the first step.

. . .

[part ii]

I LOVE SELF-DEPRICATING JINX!!!!! i literally cannot stop writing her like this goly... anyways i loved this idea sm (and am so proud of myself for it like wow im just so smart and amazing) SO I RLLY WANNA WRITE A PART 2 FROM READERS POV WHERE THEY TALK MORE ٩(^ᗜ^ )و ´- (update they did not in fact talk more)

also lowkey obsessed with the idea of obsessive stalker jinx but like this is supposed to be fluff so maybe ill write something like that another time...

thanks 4 reading as always!!! XOXOXOXOXO

[strawberry-halla]

something so amazing about solas is that he is very good at predicting his enemies and his allies moves. he’s always thinking 5 steps ahead, even varric says this. (long post incoming!)

but when it comes to lavellan, he could never predict her. when he first meets her, solas thinks she’s just another dalish elf that is unwilling to listen to his advice. nope turns out she can be willing and not only that but asks him about what he knows so she can better understand the fade/spirits/ancient elves.

and then the haven dream kiss! she’s the one who initiates and solas is once again thrown off guard because he never expected that. and then he just gives into it with so much passion and fade tongue.

in all new, faded for her, solas is once again surprised lavellan agrees with his plan to free his friend, the spirit of wisdom. because nobody in the entire inquisition (except cole) would be down for this?? like all the world knows about spirits is that they don’t ever come in contact with people unless very rarely. they’re an enigma, something to be feared even because they can become demons. but nah lavellan is like ‘yep sounds good let’s go save your friend!’

and solas after this tries to rationalize lavellan’s bizarre behavior as something the anchor changed about her. because he has always known how to read people. he can’t understand her. he thinks her ‘spirit’ has changed due to magic’s influence.

but no, lavellan surprises once again by pointing out that her choices are her own or that if the anchor did change her, wouldn’t she notice? like no wonder solas is so fucking down bad. lavellan subverts everything he thought about the modern people, not just exclusively elves. she’s constantly showing him new points of view and challenging his whole mission. and so the cracks start to form.

“you show a wisdom i haven’t seen since…*pause* my deepest journeys into the ancient memories of the fade.”

“your mind, your morals, your… *pause* spirit.”

“it would be kinder in the long run. but losing you would- *cuts himself off*”

and then if lavellan drinks from the well, this conversation and the previous quest itself (what pride had wrought) just cracks solas wide open (even if she didn’t drink). he’s visibly upset because he’s afraid the well will change lavellan and he knows first hand what it’s like to do everything for someone who made the wrong choices! so solas asks what she would do with the power of the well and he’s ONCE AGAIN thrown off guard by her answer. i really like the “help the world move forward” option because it almost aligns with solas’s plan but it doesn’t.

s: “you would risk everything you have in the hope the future is better? what if it isn’t? what if you wake up to find the future you shaped is worse than what it was?”

l: “i’ll take a breath, see where things went wrong, and then try again.”

s: “just like that?”

l: “if we don’t keep trying, we’ll never get it right.”

you’d think this would be an affirmation that solas’s plan is right, but it’s not. lavellan is wanting to fix things now and shape a better future with the well’s power. it’s eerily similar, but once again a path solas didn’t consider. she surprises once more. using the wisdom from the well to help, rather than command. sound familiar? this conversation just solidifies solas’s want. to be himself and to be solas, not fen’harel, with lavellan.

so he takes her to crestwood. somewhere intimate and quiet just for the two of them. a place where the veil is thinnest because it’s easy for spirits to cross and be comfortable. solas is going to tell lavellan the truth. he’s going to abandon his plan. but then solas gets in his own head. he fights with the possibility of her rejecting him because why wouldn’t she? he’s the very god in her culture that ruined everything. what if lavellan sees him for the monster history painted him? and then he realizes why he even wanted to tear down the veil. to avenge his oldest friend and right the wrongs he did to the elves. and it all comes crashing down in not even a second.

“then what i must tell you… *pause* …the truth.”

solas backpedals so fucking hard. the reality of everything just hits him. so he quickly redirects to the vallaslin topic because it’s familiar as he looks down at lavellan’s face and sees the markings of the very gods he locked away.

remove the vallaslin or not solas still loves her no matter what. and the sad option is still my favorite here because once again solas is slipping.

s: “you have a rare and marvelous spirit. in another world-“

l: “why not this one?”

and then at the end of veilguard, lavellan does one more thing solas doesn’t expect. after hurting her, betraying her, leaving her alone without any answers, killing one of her friends, and almost succeeding in his plan, she forgives him. lavellan abandons thedas and everything she knew to be with him. to the very end, she is subverting his tragic expectations.

“this journey is not yours alone. we make it together, always.”

[goldengalore]

Ready

An anxious!reader fic.

Summary: Harry wants kids. Y/N isn’t sure what she wants. Feeling pressured to make up her mind, she agrees to something she’s not ready for.

Word count: 3k

Warnings: angst, smut

A/N: Hello! It’s been a while. This fic is based on this ask I received forever ago. Enjoy :)

***

Y/N has always been on the fence about having kids.

As a young teenager, she assumed she would have them when she grew up, fell in love, and got married. Social norms, along with her own childish naivete, made her believe that this was the only path one could take in life. Having children was the next logical step to marriage, which was the next logical step to falling in love.

And then she matured and realized that life is not nearly as cut-and-dry, that having kids is a choice, not a necessity, and that she can absolutely go her whole life without having any if that’s what she wants. This realization came as a relief but also felt somewhat unnerving because how is she supposed to know what she wants? She is quite possibly the most indecisive person on the planet, so it’s no surprise that she has bounced back and forth between wanting and not wanting children throughout her entire adult life.

On one hand, she thinks of her friends who have kids and how their lives have become utterly consumed by the little humans that require their constant care and attention. There is just so much that Y/N wants to experience and achieve before settling into a life like that.

Not to mention the horrors of pregnancy. It’s not exactly a walk in the park, having to carry a human life inside of you for nine months and then give birth to it. The health complications, the irreversible bodily changes, the sheer, agonizing pain of childbirth.

And yet, on some days, she fantasizes about becoming a mother, of holding a tiny life in her arms and nurturing it into a full-grown adult. An important character in these fantasies has always been the sweet, thoughtful, loving partner by her side who takes equal responsibility for their child. This person was always a faceless individual—an idealistic depiction of the kind of partner Y/N hoped to find someday.

And then Harry came along.

Sweet, thoughtful, loving Harry who, unlike her, was always sure of his desire to have kids. For him, it was never a question of whether he wanted them but a question of when.

That moment finally arrived for him a year ago. But Y/N wasn’t sure if she felt ready yet.

“What are you afraid of?” he asked her one day. “I don’t mean that in a judgemental way. Bringing a child into this world is scary for anyone, including myself. I’m just curious to know what your specific concerns are.”

“Well, there’s the usual stuff, like whether or not I’ll be a good mother—”

“You’ll be a phenomenal mother.”

She smiled at him, then continued, “Or whether my kids will be able to have a good future with so much chaos in the world...” She trailed off hesitantly.

“But there’s something else,” he said, gently urging her to share what was really holding her back.

“I… I’ve always been terrified of the idea of having to raise a child alone, either because something bad happens to the father or he leaves out of the blue or we break up and I’m left to take care of this child by myself. I know it sounds ridiculous, but I… I’ve never been able to shake this fear.”

“Doesn’t sound ridiculous to me. I was raised by a single mother, so I know it’s not an easy job.” He reached for her hand and kissed her knuckle, never breaking eye contact. “But I’m not going anywhere, Y/N. You know that, right? We’re in this together. We’re a team, always.”

She nodded. “I know.”

“Well, I’m alright with waiting until you feel ready. I want us both to feel ready before we jump into this.”

In the six months following that conversation, the topic would crop up several more times, like after Harry saw her interacting with his godchildren at a party or they walked past a cute baby in a stroller at the grocery store. Y/N didn’t mind discussing the topic. It gave her a chance to ponder and become more comfortable with the concept of motherhood.

Yesterday, Harry returned home from a month-long movie shoot in Sweden. Y/N surprised him by showing up at the airport. What he doesn’t know is that she has another surprise in store for him.

While he was in Sweden, she decided to go off her birth control and now wants to try for kids.

She plans on telling him later tonight once they get home from their friend’s birthday party. They’ve been all over each other tonight. That’s what being apart for a month does to them. Hell, even a week apart is enough to turn them into a couple of horny teenagers that can’t keep their hands off each other.

“You look so hot in that dress,” Harry whispers in her ear, half-joking because they both know this is his fifth time saying that tonight.

Emboldened by a couple glasses of wine, a tipsy Y/N whispers back, “I want you to put a baby in me.”

His eyes widen. He chuckles. “That wine bringing out your wild side?”

“I’m serious,” she states, glancing around to double check that no one is within earshot of their conversation. “I went off my birth control a month ago, after you left for Sweden.”

He stares at her blankly, like her words haven’t quite sunk in.

“H, I’m ready to do this.”

“Really?”

She smiles. “Yes.”

“We’re doing this,” he says as it finally sinks in. He kisses her wine-stained lips. “Let’s get out of here, yeah?”

“Yes, please.”

Y/N can hardly keep her composure on the way home. Harry appears to be in the same boat, as he keeps sneaking glances at her while driving, his hand caressing her thigh. While he’s always been a responsible driver, she can sense the impatience in his maneuvers tonight.

Once they’re home, it’s almost a race to the bedroom. Harry gently pushes her onto the bed and climbs on top of her.

“Do you have any idea how hard it’s been to watch you walk around in this dress tonight”—he runs a hand down her front—“and not be able to bend you over and just slip my cock into you?”

She moans as he cups her pussy through her dress with a firm hand. He lets her grind against it for a minute before pulling away to take off his clothes. She follows suit.

Soon, they’re back on the bed, sharing another series of ardent kisses. By the time he goes down on her, she’s already dripping wet and he licks it up as if he hasn’t had a drop of water in days. Her hips grind against his tongue like they did against his hand just a moment ago. It doesn’t take her long to orgasm.

He shifts up the bed to hover over her body. He kisses her again while lining up his cock with her entrance. As he slides into her, she feels a slight discomfort from being stretched open for the first time in a month. He pulls out and pushes in a little deeper each time to let her adjust until he fills her up completely and she’s too immersed in pleasure to have a single coherent thought anymore.

“Fuck, you feel incredible,” he says, starting to pump in and out. “Gonna come inside you, yeah? Gonna come deep inside your tight little cunt and fill you up, put a baby in you. Is that what you want?”

Those words flip a switch in Y/N’s mind. She makes an involuntary noise that makes it seem like she’s agreeing with him, so he picks up his pace. Just as he finishes inside her, the terrible realization dawns: She is not ready to have a baby. Not at all.

“I love you,” Harry whispers in her ear, his body resting flush against hers as he comes down from his high.

Tears spring to Y/N’s eyes as she realizes what she’s done, what they’ve just done. When she doesn’t reciprocate his statement, he lifts his head to look at her. A tear escapes her left eye at that exact moment.

Concern furrows his brow. “Lovie? Hey, what’s wrong?”

She just shakes her head while staring at the ceiling.

“Y/N.” He caresses her cheek, urging her to look at him. “What’s the matter? Are you hurt? Did I go too—”

“We shouldn’t have done this. It was a mistake,” she says in a trembling voice.

“What are you talking about?”

She tries to sit up. Harry moves out of her way.

“I’m not ready, H. I’m not ready to have a baby.”

His face falls. “I— But— Then why did you say you were ready?”

“I don’t know… To make you happy?” She covers her face and hears him sigh heavily.

“Y/N, you can’t— You can’t lie about things like that just to make me happy. It’s not like we were deciding what to have for dinner. We’re talking about having a baby, for Christ’s sake.”

“I know that. Of course I know that. But I just— I see the disappointment in your face every time we talk about this, every time I tell you I’m not ready. You seem so sad, Harry. I hate it.”

“Well, I’m sorry I’m not able to hide my emotions as well as I thought I could. That still doesn’t mean you should lie to please me. I thought we were past foolish antics like this.”

She squints at him. “Foolish antics?”

He sighs again. “I didn’t mean it like—”

She turns away from him and gets off the bed.

“Y/N.”

She shuts herself in the bathroom. For a brief moment, a part of her resents him. Resents him for being ready to have kids before she was. For bringing it up so often. For making her feel as though she needed to lie about being ready just to make him happy.

But now, as she stares at her teary-eyed reflection in the mirror, she knows she has to take responsibility. She is the one who led him to believe that she was ready when deep down, she knew she wasn’t. He never once pressured her to make up her mind or acted like he loved her any less for not wanting kids yet. He never made her feel any type of way about it. He has done nothing but be the supportive, understanding partner he’s always been. It was her who doubted that. She let her own paranoia get to her.

Knock, knock, knock.

“Y/N? Can I come in?”

A few moments later, he knocks again.

“Please, lovie? I’m getting worried.”

Finally, she opens the door. He takes in her red, puffy eyes and tentatively places his arms around her, only pulling her in when she steps into his embrace.

They stand there silently until he says, “Why don’t we head over to the pharmacy and get you a morning after pill?”

She agrees, so they get dressed and head out. The ride to the pharmacy is a quiet one. Every time she glances at Harry, his eyes are focused on the road, both hands gripping the steering wheel, and he appears deep in thought. It’s the complete opposite of their ride home from the party, when he could hardly keep his hands or his eyes off her. She tries to think of ways to break the silence, but nothing feels appropriate. The last time she felt so awkward and unsure about what to say around Harry was when they first started going out and she was terrified of saying the wrong thing.

When they get back from the pharmacy, she swallows down the pill with some water and they head back to bed.

***

Y/N: Hey H, you on your way home? Hope you’re hungry, I made your favourite for dinner 😊

H: I have a business dinner tonight. Mentioned it this morning

Y/N: Oh! Sorry I forgot about that. I’ll save some in the fridge for you for tomorrow

H: Sure, thanks

Y/N stares at the message. She can’t tell if she’s reading into things or if Harry’s replies really are as dry and aloof as they sound. Her propensity to overanalyze everything makes it difficult to know. Ever since the incident in the bedroom a few days ago, it feels as though Harry has been avoiding her. Spending long days at the studio, coming home late at night when he knows she’ll be asleep, giving short replies, taking longer to text back. They haven’t had sex again since then either.

After scrutinizing their text conversation for twenty minutes, she comes to her senses and realizes that she can’t keep going on like this. It’s driving her crazy. What she needs to do is talk to him. But he’ll most likely be tired when he gets home.

At first, she thinks she’ll sit him down tomorrow morning and talk it out. But when he walks through the front door just after eleven o’clock that night, she can’t help herself.

She stands in the kitchen, leaning against the counter with a cup of tea, when he enters. The dark circles under his eyes are noticeable. He has been willing to sacrifice his sleep just to avoid being around her any longer than he has to. Her chest constricts.

“Hey,” he says, placing his phone and keys on the counter. “You’re still up.”

“Can’t sleep.” She stares down into her half-empty mug, the remainder of the tea quickly growing cold.

“How come?”

“I can’t stop thinking.”

“About…?”

She swallows the lump in her throat and looks up at him. “About whether or not you’re upset with me and how I can fix it.”

He frowns. “Why would I be upset with you?”

“Because of what happened a few nights ago.”

His frown dissolves into something different—sympathy? Guilt?

“Y/N, I’m not upset with you about that.”

“Are you sure? Because it seems like it. You’re gone before I’m even awake and you come home when I’m going to bed. We’ve barely talked or kissed or cuddled in the past few days. I know you haven’t been that busy since you got back from Sweden, so… I don’t really see any other explanation.”

He stares at her wordlessly for a long time before speaking. “You’re right. I have been avoiding you. But it’s not because I’m upset with you. It’s because I’m upset with myself. I feel like I pressured you into doing something you obviously weren’t comfortable with. I never saw myself as someone who pressures people into doing things they don’t want to do. So, I suppose I’ve been feeling some shame and guilt about it… and then avoiding you because it’s hard to face these feelings.”

Y/N sets her tea on the counter. She never could’ve guessed that Harry felt this way. She was so convinced that he was mad at her, it didn’t even occur to her that he might just be feeling guilty about it all. After how long she has known him, it should have been obvious that the latter is more consistent with his character, but her anxious brain wouldn’t even let her consider that possibility. She walks over and wraps her arms around him.

“H, I had no idea you felt that way.”

He squeezes her tightly, resting his chin on her head. She turns her head to the side so that her cheek is against his chest.

“To be honest, there were times I felt pressured when the topic of kids came up,” she says. “But a lot of that pressure was created by my own fears and insecurities. I just hated disappointing you over and over. I was scared your feelings about me, about us, would change if I kept saying I wasn’t ready.”

“This hasn’t changed how I feel about you or us. Y/N, I want you more than I want kids. Way more. If you decided one day that you don’t want them at all, that still wouldn’t change how I feel about you.”

She pulls back to look at him. “Are you sure? That’s a dealbreaker for a lot of people.”

“Well, not for me. Not when it comes to you. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

Suddenly, he lifts her up onto the counter and stands between her legs.

“So. What did you get up to today?” he asks, planting a kiss to her collarbone.

She rests her hands on his chest. “Hmm, what did I get up to? I hardly remember anything other than obsessing over this whole situation.” She laughs.

“Aw, lovie, I’m sorry I had you all stressed out.”

“It’s okay.”

“Maybe I can make it up to you. Help you relieve all that stress.” He peppers kisses along the side of her neck and jaw.

She sighs softly and closes her eyes. “I would like that.”

***

Thank you for reading! For more anxious!reader and other fics, check out my MASTERLIST

[hesperocyon-lesbian]

I posted this in the replies of a post recently but I feel like actually posting it so fuck it

This is all purely anecdotal, and I’d love for someone to do a study on this in some capacity but that’s probably not gonna happen so whatever. I’ve noticed pretty consistently that trans spaces I’ve been in lean heavily majority transmasc, particularly when they skew younger (eg college campus trans groups) and that on average transmascs seem to come out younger than transfems. To be extremely clear this is not a complaint, but rather an observation

And for a while now I’ve been pretty sure I know the reason for this. Generally, people who are afab have more leeway for gender expression when they’re teenagers than people who are amab do. This, obviously is not universal. There are many communities whose misogyny includes not letting those they perceive as women dress in pants or suits, etc. However, communities such as those are also just as harsh and violent to those they perceive as men wearing women’s clothes. Whereas, in communities where afab people dressing in pants, suits, etc is accepted, the same for amab people wearing dresses, skirts, makeup, etc is very rarely as accepted.

The end result is this: transfems rarely have our eggs cracked young, because what that often requires is an initial moment of gender euphoria. Dysphoria is far harder to recognize when it’s your baseline, and you’ve never experienced euphoria before. So, young transfem eggs rarely have the experience of trying on clothes that make them feel like the girls they are, whereas such moments seem more common for young transmasc eggs.

This, I think, is one of several reasons that the whole language and culture of “eggs” skews almost exclusively towards encompassing transfems. Our moments of exploring gender expression are rarer and later in life, and stand out so much because of the stigma and insecurity that surrounds them.

I think this is one of several disconnects that some tme people are having with the currently ongoing egg discourse. Transfem eggs often don’t have an opportunity to explore gender presentation ourselves, so we often require someone else to extend a hand and give us an opportunity to try on dresses or try out she/her pronouns or just make a part of us we’ve buried so deeply feel seen. It’s so much of a longer process to reach that point on our own.

To be clear again, none of this is to say that transmascs have it easy, or anything of the sort. Our transitions take different paths, and I think there will always be a disconnect if transfems’ paths to coming out aren’t viewed through the context of how limited our options are.

[angelssmvse]

𝘼 𝘿𝘼𝙉𝘾𝙀 𝙒𝙄𝙏𝙃 𝙏𝙃𝙀 𝙀𝙉𝙀𝙈𝙔

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ 𝘳𝘢𝘧𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘮𝘦𝘳𝘰𝘯 𝘹 𝘧𝘦𝘮!𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘳 (𝘴𝘮𝘶𝘵 / 𝘧𝘭𝘶𝘧𝘧)

𝜗𝜚 𝙎𝙐𝙈𝙈𝘼𝙍𝙔 You’re JJ’s sister, part of a close-knit group of friends who’ve been through thick and thin together. But when you discover you have "kook" blood, your whole world is thrown into doubt. Among the chaos, Rafe Cameron becomes a constant source of tension, and despite your differences, your paths inevitably cross. After a violent storm leaves you and Rafe stranded in Morocco, you’re forced to rely on each other for survival. In the midst of uncertainty and danger, you start to realize that maybe, after everything, you’ve both been searching for something in each other all along.

𝜗𝜚 𝘼/𝙉 I happened to dream about Rafe Cameron last night and I HAD to write about him, so here’s a one shot smut (with an interesting plot + enemies to lovers). Enjoy angels <3

𝜗𝜚 𝙒𝘼𝙍𝙉𝙄𝙉𝙂𝙎 smut! minors DNI. This narrative contains mature themes and explicit content, including strong language, depictions of violence, adult situations (smut), and elements of both humor and tenderness (unprotected sex, p in v). Reader discretion is advised.

You were JJ’s younger sister, a proud Pogue, raised in a violent family but surrounded by loyal, kind-hearted friends. Your tight-knit circle, bonded by years of shared memories, was your world—Kiara, in particular, was your closest friend. Despite being a “half Pogue” by blood (as she came from a Kook family), Kiara was more like a sister than a friend. You never cared about fame or wealth. What mattered to you was living a peaceful life surrounded by the people you considered family. Your brother JJ, always impulsive and reckless, had a knack for getting into trouble. He often acted as though he could simply reset any bad situation, which meant you were left to pick up the pieces and look out for him. His anger issues, inherited from your father, could be unsettling at times, but you always knew he would never direct that anger towards you. Then there was Sarah—once a close friend before the tension between her and Kiara caused a rift. Naturally, you took Kiara’s side, but you were relieved when they eventually reconciled. In your younger years, Sarah was someone you’d spend a lot of time with. You’d visit her house, throw parties, and, inevitably, there was always someone who would find it amusing to tease you. The main culprit? Rafe fucking Cameron, Sarah’s older brother. Rafe had a reputation as a bit of a bully, though it was more complicated than that. He was rich, popular, and undeniably handsome, often using his status to irritate you and your friends. But after everything that had transpired in recent months, it seemed he had bigger problems to deal with—including that new buzz cut.

You were helping John B with some fishing, wrapping up a few chores before taking a moment to relax. “I’m just so glad we figured everything out, you know? Like… the old me wouldn’t even recognize myself. And JJ? I’ve never seen him this happy,” you say with a soft laugh, the thought of your brother bringing a smile to your face. John B returns the smile. “Yeah, I’m grateful for everything,” he says, taking a sip of his beer. The view from the boat was perfect—the calm, glassy water, the fresh fish, the sunset painting the sky, cold beers in hand, and the easy flow of conversation. It was the kind of moment you never wanted to end. Except… a larger boat, definitely a Kook’s, was drawing dangerously close. John B narrowed his eyes, and without a word, he flicked on the motor. “Hey! What the hell do you think you’re doing?!” you shouted, glaring at the other boat. “Hey!” John B added, raising his voice as he tried to get their attention. Then you saw him. “Rafe?” you said, disappointment lacing your tone. “Rafe!” you repeated, disbelief creeping in. He smirked, leaning casually against the side of the boat. “Our property now! Go away, Pogues!” one of his friends yelled, throwing an obnoxious wave in your direction. “Leave, assholes!” They added, flinging their drink at your boat—whatever rich liquor they were sipping splashing across you. For a moment, you just stood there, frozen, as the alcohol soaked your clothes. “John B, let’s just leave,” you whispered, frustration simmering beneath your calm exterior. “What the hell!?” John B shouted, throwing his arms up in disbelief. Rafe’s head appeared over the side of the boat, holding a glass of whiskey in one hand, stumbling slightly as he tried to stay balanced. “Hey, y’all better leave,” he said, his voice nonchalant, though it was clear he was barely keeping it together. With a resigned sigh, you and John B started the boat, silently putting distance between yourselves and Rafe’s crew. It was clear they had nothing better to do than ruin the peaceful moment, but you weren’t about to let them.

A couple of weeks later, you found yourself on the same boat with Rafe—of all people—as he had just saved your asses from the police. Now, you were heading to Morocco, a place that seemed both like an escape and a new chapter of uncertainty. It had been a crazy ride—Sarah was pregnant, JJ was as drunk as ever, and you, well... you almost lost everything. Your property. Your life. You nearly got killed by some random guys, Pope had been arrested, and to top it all off, you had just discovered a truth that shattered everything you thought you knew. Your entire life had been a lie. You were a Pogue, born and raised, yet somehow, you had Kook blood running through your veins. Who would’ve thought? The irony wasn't lost on you. As the group argued over what to do with Rafe, you sat on the floor, trying to block out the noise. JJ, however, had fallen uncharacteristically silent, his eyes fixed on you while he sipped his drink. It was like he was trying to read you, but even in your haze, you could feel the weight of his gaze. He moved closer and sat down next to you, his breath heavy with the sharp scent of alcohol that always reminded you of your non-Dad. "Hey..." he murmured, his voice softer than usual. "Everything will be fine, okay? I’ll figure this out. We’ll kick Rafe off this boat, and—". But you couldn’t take it anymore. You stood up abruptly, pushing him away, the weight of everything crashing down on you all at once. Tears you had been holding back for so long finally spilled over, streaming down your cheeks. You could barely breathe, the pressure of it all suffocating you. "Jesus Christ, JJ, stop it," you said, your voice breaking as you turned and rushed toward one of the rooms, trying to escape from the overwhelming emotions that flooded through you. From his position, Rafe had been watching the entire scene unfold, observing everything from the higher deck as he took control of the ship. He didn’t trust any of you—not after everything that had happened. He knew he was in the wrong too; after all the backstabbing, the betrayals, the lies. He had done everything to gain your groups trust, and yet... despite everything, something about this group still gnawed at him. He had always denied it, but there was a part of him—an uncomfortable part—that felt a strange attachment to you. He hated how much it infuriated him when you talked to other guys, or worse, when they looked at you even for a second. It would drive him mad, make him feel this irrational, burning jealousy he couldn’t explain. Watching you laugh with the others, seeing how they adored you, made him lose his mind in ways he couldn’t understand. He had tried to push it all down, to convince himself that he hated you—that he hated everything about you. But every time he did, it just made him more miserable. When he saw you upset, it twisted something in his chest. He had always hated that about himself.

You woke up groggily from your nap, the boat gently rocking beneath you. Stepping out of your cabin, you made your way to the girls, feeling the weight of the day still hanging heavy on your shoulders. "Hey..." you whispered as you sat down next to them. Kiara immediately pulled you into a hug, her touch warm and comforting. "Are you feeling better?" she asked softly. "We didn't want to bother you." You let out a small sigh, nodding. "Yeah, I’m fine... Where are the others?" You looked around, surprised at how calm the boat felt, especially after everything that had happened. The girls exchanged a glance before the silence was broken by a scream from one of the locked rooms. "Let me out!" Rafe’s voice echoed, the desperation clear. You raised an eyebrow, looking at the girls in confusion. "What’s Rafe doing in there?" you asked, your voice unsure. Sarah sighed, her face tight with frustration. "We went to talk to him... and it didn’t end very well. He was armed. JJ punched him, and that was the only option left." You nodded slowly, trying to process it all. "Mhm. Okay. Okay." You took a deep breath, running a hand through your hair. "I think we should make dinner, huh?" It was the only thing you could think of to distract yourself from everything spinning in your mind. You didn’t want to open up, didn’t want to burden anyone with your problems. Everyone here had their own issues, and you had to deal with yours, quietly.As dinner came together, you prepared a small portion for Rafe. You hesitated for a moment, but then said, "I’ll bring this for him," before carefully picking up the plate and walking towards the door where Rafe was locked up.

You unlocked the door slowly, the sound of the mechanism clicking louder than it should’ve been. There, in the dim light, Rafe was sitting on the floor, his hands tied and drenched in sweat. His eyes lifted to meet yours, and for a split second, you saw something softer in them, something almost vulnerable. "Here," you said quietly, setting the plate of food down on the floor in front of him. You could feel his gaze on you as you stood, awkwardly, unsure of what to do next. He didn’t move, staring at the food without touching it. You glanced up at him again, catching his eye. "I’m sorry. They had no choice but this." Your voice was barely above a whisper, the weight of the words sitting between you both. Just as you turned to leave, you heard his voice, softer, but desperate. "Wait," he said, the word barely escaping his lips. "Just—stay. Please,". You froze, your back still facing him. For a brief moment, you hesitated. If you left now, you'd be an ass—he’d hate you for it. But then again, why should you care? He probably already hated you, right? And staying, talking to him... that felt like a betrayal to your friends, a line you didn’t want to cross. You swallowed the tight feeling in your throat and turned, shutting the door softly behind you. "Hey! Wait!" Rafe’s voice cracked through the silence, louder this time. "Hey!" He shouted, his frustration rising. You heard him begin to violently kick the walls, the sound sharp and jarring. "You’re just gonna leave me in here?!". You could feel the heat of his anger seeping through the door as he threw the food you’d just given him, the clatter of it hitting the walls making your stomach twist. You didn't look back. Instead, you kept walking, your heart pounding in your chest. As you moved away, you couldn’t shake the feeling that there was something more to Rafe’s anger, something deeper. And despite everything that had happened—despite the hatred, the violence, the lies—you couldn’t help but wonder what it was that kept pulling you back to him.

The storm hit hard, howling through the night, throwing waves against the sides of the ship. You could hear the wind tearing at the sails and the relentless crash of thunder overhead. The entire ship felt alive, bucking beneath you as you clung to the nearest railing, trying to steady yourself as everything around you shook. You and John B were doing your best to keep things from spiraling out of control, struggling to keep the ship from tipping over in the chaos. But even with all the work, your mind was elsewhere. Suddenly, a thought pulled you out of your focused panic: Rafe. “Hey!” you shouted over the roar of the storm, trying to catch his attention. "I’m going to see what's going on down there, okay?" you yelled, nodding toward the cabin, your voice barely carrying over the loud wind. He gave you a curt nod, already moving in his own direction. You didn’t wait any longer. You turned on your heel, struggling to keep your balance as you made your way below deck. The floor was slick, waves crashing against the hull, and everything around you seemed to be in a constant state of motion, making it almost impossible to stay upright. You braced yourself against the walls, your heart pounding from the adrenaline, until you finally reached the locked door. “Rafe!” you called, your voice cracking slightly from the strain of the storm. You knelt down, quickly untying the knot that held his hands. You brushed your wet hair behind your ear, glancing up at him as he looked back at you. "Please don't let me regret this," you whispered, the words slipping out before you could stop them. Rafe chuckled darkly, shaking his head.

You both wasted no time. With a quick glance, Rafe took your hand and led the way. He moved with purpose, navigating the ship like he owned it, knowing every creak and groan of the ship better than anyone. You were behind him, just trying to keep up as the ship pitched and rolled beneath you, the storm making everything harder than it already was. Then, as you passed the galley, you both froze. There, sitting on the floor in the middle of the chaos, was JJ. He was slumped against the wall, a bottle of liquor in his hand, his head hanging low. His hair was wet and sticking to his forehead, and he looked like he was barely holding it together. “JJ…” you said softly, your heart aching at the sight of your brother in such a state. You walked towards him, but Rafe stayed a few paces behind, eyes locked on the situation. “Please get up,” you pleaded, your voice barely audible over the storm’s fury. JJ slowly lifted his head, his eyes glazed and unfocused. When he saw you, his lips twisted into a half-smile. "Or what? You got yourself a new boyfriend, huh?" he slurred, his voice thick with alcohol. You winced, feeling a pang of frustration. He was so drunk, so out of it, and it made everything worse. "JJ, please," you repeated, walking closer, trying to help him to his feet. But before you could reach him, he suddenly pushed himself up, swaying unsteadily. His glare was unfocused, but it was still intense. He held the bottle out toward you, but you moved quickly, taking it from his hands. “Enough,” Rafe’s voice cut through the tension. He stepped forward, placing himself between you and JJ. His tone was hard, firm. "Let's just get the hell out of here," he said, his voice quiet but commanding. JJ glared at him, his anger flaring. “You stay out of this, Rafe,” he snapped, his voice rough, but it didn’t have the usual bite. He was too drunk to even stand up straight, let alone fight back. Rafe stood his ground, pushing JJ back a step when he made a move toward you. "Not this time," Rafe said coldly. He didn’t even raise his voice, but his presence alone made JJ take a step back. You looked at both of them, torn between your brother and the strange, undeniable tension that hung in the air between you and Rafe. Your heart raced as you realized just how close everything was to spiraling out of control. The storm outside mirrored the one raging within the confines of the ship. For a long, tense moment, no one moved. You looked between Rafe and JJ, feeling the weight of the situation press down on you. Rafe’s expression softened slightly, but only just enough to show a hint of something unspoken. As you took a step back, you glanced at JJ, seeing the hurt and anger in his eyes, the pain behind the alcohol. “Let’s just get out of here,” you repeated, your voice quieter now. You turned toward the exit, Rafe’s hand guiding you away, as the storm raged on around you. But behind you, JJ’s words still echoed, mixing with the thunder outside, an angry shout that faded into the sound of the storm.

The three of you made your way back to the others, the atmosphere thick with tension as you all sat down around the dining table. The ship’s constant creaking beneath the storm’s fury only made the silence between you all feel heavier, more suffocating. The occasional flashes of lightning illuminated the space, highlighting the uneasy glances everyone was giving Rafe. The looks were silent, but they said it all: they didn’t trust him. And right now, you couldn’t blame them. You sat there, lost in your own thoughts, barely noticing the way the ship rocked violently beneath you. Everything felt so out of control, like you were spiraling, each moment pulling you further away from any semblance of safety. The storm, the tension, the confusion—it was all too much.

Then Sarah stood up, the scrape of her chair against the floor dragging everyone’s attention toward her. “Guys—where’s John B?” she asked, her voice full of panic. The group exchanged looks, eyes widening. The space suddenly felt too small, too tight. “I’ve got to find him,” Sarah said quickly, her voice sharp with urgency. Without waiting for anyone to stop her, she dashed toward the exit. “Sarah, wait!” you called after her, but she was already gone, running through the storm, gripping onto the nearest stable object to steady herself as the ship lurched violently. “John B!” she screamed, her voice barely audible over the sound of the wind and crashing waves. Her words were swallowed by the storm, and for a moment, you thought you might have imagined the way the air grew still around you. But then it happened—without warning, a massive wave crashed against the ship, slamming into Sarah with such force that her scream was suddenly cut short. Her body was swept off the ship, pulled into the dark, merciless sea by the violent water. “No!” you shouted, jumping to your feet, your heart hammering in your chest. You could barely process what you had just seen. The rest of the group scrambled, horrified, frozen in place for a moment. JJ was the first to react. Without hesitation, he dove toward the railing, reaching out for Sarah as she was dragged further away from the ship. "Sarah!" he screamed, but she was too far. His eyes locked onto her, and there was no choice left. He jumped. He didn’t even think, just threw himself into the water, desperate to save her, to pull her back. You stood there, unable to breathe, your eyes wide in disbelief. You watched as JJ disappeared into the waves, leaving you behind. John B and the others had seen it, too, all of you trapped in this horrible moment. Your mind raced, but your body was paralyzed, unable to move, unable to do anything to stop the chaos unfolding in front of you. Your best friend and your brother—two of the most important people in your life—were now lost in the storm, and there was nothing you could do to bring them back.

Tears welled up in your eyes, blurring your vision. You turned around, your chest tight, hoping for some kind of comfort, some kind of clarity. But when you met Rafe’s eyes, the last person you expected to be there, you saw something you didn’t expect: sincerity. His expression was dark, filled with regret, pain, and maybe even guilt. Before you could say anything, Rafe was already there, pulling you into his arms. His embrace was tight, his hands running through your wet hair as the tears you had been holding back finally spilled over. You cried, quietly at first, your body trembling in his arms. “I’m sorry,” he whispered, his voice low and rough, like he couldn’t find the right words, like he was searching for something to say but couldn’t find it. You didn’t know what to say, what to do. You didn’t want to feel this connection to him, not after everything that had happened, but in this moment, his touch was the only thing that grounded you. The storm outside, the storm in your heart—it all blurred together. All you could feel was the weight of what you had just lost. As Rafe held you, his warmth in contrast to the coldness of the storm, you clung to him, your tears soaking into his shirt. The sound of the storm, of crashing waves and thunder, seemed to fade into the background, drowned out by the chaos in your heart. In the silence of the ship, with only the two of you holding on, there was a brief moment where nothing else mattered.

The ship tilted violently, a massive wave crashing into it, sending everything into chaos. You reached for Rafe’s hand, but the wind and water pulled you apart. He grabbed you tighter, but it only made things worse as the ship lurched again, sending both of you overboard. You tried to hold on, but the weight of the water and the force of the storm were too much. The cold sea engulfed you both, dragging you down, your desperate gasps for air lost to the waves. The ship’s creaks and groans faded into the distance as you were pulled under, and just like that, you and Rafe were gone. Onboard, the rest of the group watched in horror, realizing they had lost not two, but four of you. The nightmare was endless, the storm swallowing everything in its path.

You and Rafe, still holding hands, struggled to stay afloat in the violent ocean. Hours passed, each minute feeling like days, until you finally spotted land. The moment you reached the shore, you collapsed onto the sand, exhausted and grateful. "Yes! Finally some land!" you yelled, gasping for breath. Rafe lay next to you, closing his eyes, and you stood over him, still trying to catch your breath. "What?" he murmured, not opening his eyes. "Are you planning to stay here forever?" you asked, hands on your hips. "God, let me take a break," he groaned, finally opening his eyes. "I’m hungry, Rafe." The two of you started a fire and managed to catch some fish after several failed attempts. It wasn't much, but it was better than starving. As the fish cooked, you sat in silence, staring at the fire. Rafe sat next to you, but kept his distance. "We should keep moving—find the others," you said, your voice cold. "I don't even know if my brother's still alive. We barely—" He interrupted you. "Let’s just rest for a bit, regain the energy we’ve lost." You shot him an angry glare, your frustration boiling over. For a split second, he saw something familiar in your eyes—your brother’s fire, your brother’s determination. You were unrecognizable, and it made his stomach twist. "No," you said, looking away, your voice quieter now.

You both set off again, trekking through unfamiliar terrain in search of the rest of the group. Hours passed without any sign of them. The search led you to a village, but you were lost in the maze of unknown streets. There was no trail, no clues. "Let’s just stop for a second and think, baby," Rafe suggested, his voice softer. You spun around, fury rising in your chest. "Don’t call me that!" you screamed, your finger pointed at him. Rafe’s patience snapped. He grabbed your wrist, pinning you against a nearby wall. "Hey, listen to me," he hissed, his voice low but firm. "I’m done obeying. Done doing whatever you're trying to do. You’re blinded by rage, and don't try to deny it. I know exactly how it feels." You froze, the fire in your eyes flickering for just a moment. His words hit harder than you expected. He was right—you were blinded by anger. You softened, just for a second, and his grip on your wrist loosened, giving you space. "Okay..." you whispered, feeling defeated but also oddly calm. "What do you have in mind?" A slow smile spread across Rafe’s face as he pulled a wad of cash from his pocket. "Where did you...?" you asked, confused and surprised. "Just follow me," he said, his grin widening.

The sun was setting as you and Rafe finally found a hotel for the night. The exhaustion of the day hung heavy on both of you, but as soon as you entered the room, your eyes locked on the single bed in the middle of it. You paused for a second, staring at it, then turned to Rafe. Before you could even say anything, he threw his hands up in defense. "It was the cheapest one, don’t blame it on me." You rolled your eyes and shook your head, unable to suppress a small sigh. "Of course," you muttered, rubbing your temples. The day had been long enough without having to deal with this. Rafe just shrugged, a hint of amusement in his eyes. "It’s not like you had any better ideas," he added, smirking. You narrowed your eyes at him but didn’t say anything more. What could you say? You were too tired to argue. Still, the thought of sharing a bed with him made your skin crawl a little. But in the end, you didn’t have much of a choice. "Fine," you said, dropping your bag onto the floor. "Let’s just get through the night.". Rafe gave a half-grin, settling down on the edge of the bed. "Agreed." It wasn’t ideal. But after everything, it was at least a place to rest—something you both desperately needed.

It was late, and sleep refused to come. You sat up, glancing over at Rafe’s face in the soft moonlight. He looked so different—almost innocent, like someone else entirely. He wasn’t the man everyone feared, the violent, unpredictable guy. Maybe he needed to be understood. Or maybe, you thought, you were just too tired to think clearly. You slipped out of bed quietly and made your way to the balcony, craving the cool night air. The breeze hit your skin, and for a moment, you felt a sense of calm wash over you. You leaned against the railing, taking in the view as you let your thoughts drift. You couldn’t help but reflect on your past—how you’d gone from having nothing, to having everything, and then losing it all over again. When would it stop? Just as the weight of your thoughts grew heavy, a voice broke the silence. “The view’s beautiful, mhm?” Rafe’s voice was low, his gaze distant as he stood in the doorway, his eyes turned away. You turned toward him, catching his eyes for a brief moment before looking away. "Yeah, it really is," you said softly, your voice almost drowned out by the sounds of the night. Rafe nodded, clearly trying to find the right words, but they didn’t seem to come. The silence stretched between you, both of you caught in your own heads. You could feel the tension rising, the unspoken words thick in the air. You took a breath and spoke up, the words slipping out before you could stop them. “Hey, Rafe?”—“Yeah?” he responded quietly, turning his attention back to you. You hesitated, then looked up at him. “Thank you. Thank you for saving me.” A smile tugged at the corner of Rafe’s mouth. He gave a small nod. “You wouldn’t be sleeping in a nice hotel if it wasn’t for me,” he said with a light chuckle, the tension in his voice easing for a second. You couldn’t help but smile, a soft laugh escaping you as you lightly punched his arm. "Hey," you teased, trying to break the seriousness that had built between you.

The brief moment of laughter faded quickly, and the air around you both grew heavier. The silence between you two became thick with something else, something unspoken. Your eyes locked once again, and this time, neither of you looked away. It felt like the space between you was closing, drawn in by some invisible force. Your heart raced as you both stood there, drawn together by the weight of the moment. The space between the two of you slowly closes as he kisses your soft lips. The kiss deepens, becoming more and more passionate. His hands roam over your body going to your hips as he holds you tight. You, tip toed, hold him by his neck as he picks you up bringing you to the bed finding himself on top of you now. You look up as you catch his gaze, filled of lust and desire. He begins to kiss your neck leaving love trails all over you, his warm breath makes you arch your back against him—and God knows how much he loved it, how long he wanted this, just to have you closer to him made this man feel complete somehow. A shiver run through your spine as you feel his belt unbuckle, he kisses you before leaning back, staring at you for permission as you nod. And without hesitation he finds his entrance starting to follow a slow and steady rhythm, not wanting to hurt you. You moaned holding tight onto his shoulders, he began to move faster making you moan louder, he smirks, “You like it? Mhm?” He whimpers in your ear as he kept going. You were so close, trying to hold tight miserably. Your legs wrapped around him as he slows his pace teasing you. “Rafe,” you whimper, “please.” Rafe smiles at you as he keeps up to his pace again finally making you reach you climax as you arch you back releasing all that you had left. He keeps going before pulling out and crashing on top for you catching his breath and softly kissing your neck. He loved every single thing about you—the way your hair fell just right, the way your eyes sparkled, the fire in your voice. He loved your stubbornness, the way you never backed down. But that was the problem. He hated the fact that he loved you. It infuriated him, this feeling he couldn’t control—couldn’t fight. You were everything he couldn’t have, everything he’d never deserve. And yet, there he was, drawn to you in a way that made him lose himself, lose the hard shell he’d built around his heart. He hated how much he wanted you. How much he needed you. Because in the end, he knew it would never end well. It never did. But in this moment, as your gaze met his, as your lips met his, he couldn't bring himself to care.

Maybe that was it—maybe all you both needed was each other this whole time. Maybe the answer had always been simpler than you thought. Maybe, despite everything that stood between you, despite the complications and the fear, all you really needed was to be together. To stop fighting it, stop pretending you didn’t care. And maybe, just maybe, it was finally time to admit that, for both of you, this was where you belonged.

Copyright © angelssmvse 2024 — I own only this story; please do not copy nor translate without permission or proper attribution. I give credit for the character Rafe Cameron from the series "Outer Banks" by Jonas Pate. This is the only platform where I have published the story.

[paxtito]

sex, drugs, etc.

pairings: vada x reader (g!p)

word count: 4759

warnings: smut 18+, swearing, use of drugs, p in v, they’re high af

summary: you’re a bright student but your sensibleness crumbles when vada is around

a/n: hii, this fic is back up, i privated it because i can’t tell if i like it or not and was contemplating on rewriting but i’ll just leave it as it is 🙃

MASTERLIST

The hazy glow of the fairy lights strung across your ceiling seems a little too bright, a little too soft, like you’re floating inside some kind of dreamy bubble. You’re lying back on your bed, giggling at absolutely nothing, while Vada’s sprawled out beside you, head tilted back as she lets out a satisfied sigh. There’s a faint smell of something smoky lingering in the air, and your head feels light, like you’ve somehow managed to let go of all the things that usually weigh you down.

Vada’s influence, no doubt.

You were a goodie two-shoes once—always playing by the rules, never straying too far outside the lines. But somehow, Vada makes it all seem… different. She’s got that spark, that wild, untamed energy that makes everything feel like an adventure. One look, one crooked smile, and you find yourself following her down paths you never thought you’d tread.

“How are you feeling?” she asks, grinning at you, her eyes a little glassy but filled with that mischievous glint that you’ve come to both fear and love.

You take a second to think, to try to wrap your head around the way your body feels. Every little sensation is sharper, more vivid—the cool sheets under you, the warmth of her arm brushing yours. It’s like your mind’s taking it all in for the first time.

“Floaty,” you say, and then break into a giggle that you can’t seem to stop. “And really, really good.”

Vada chuckles, and the sound is low and relaxed, like she’s sharing some secret with you. She reaches over, tugging a strand of your hair playfully. “See? Told you you’d like it. Gotta loosen up a little, take the world in from a different angle.”

You roll your eyes but can’t hide the smile tugging at your lips. “Yeah, well, you make it look way easier than it is.”

She shrugs, leaning back against your pillows, stretching out like she owns the place, which in some strange way, she kind of does. “It’s not about being easy; it’s about not caring so much.” She glances at you, her expression softening just a little. “You care about everything.”

You don’t know whether it’s the haze of the high or the warmth in her gaze, but something about her words hits you right in the chest. She’s right, of course. You care too much, about what people think, about doing the “right” thing, about all the expectations you’ve spent so long trying to live up to.

“You make it sound simple,” you murmur, half lost in your thoughts.

“That’s ‘cause it is.” Vada shifts closer, nudging you with her shoulder, a quiet reassurance in her touch. “You just need a little nudge.”

You turn to look at her, catching the way her eyes linger on yours, her smile soft but knowing, like she’s already seen all the things you’re too scared to let loose. For a second, the world feels like it’s made just of the two of you, drifting in your little haze, nothing else mattering.

“What?” you ask, your voice a little quieter than you meant.

She shrugs again, her eyes still on you. “Just thinking I like seeing you like this.”

“Like what?” you ask, raising an eyebrow.

“Happy. Unfiltered. You.” She grins, breaking the moment with that wild, charming smile that always gets you.

Vada's words linger in the air between you, sweet and intoxicating. You feel a flush creep up your neck, warmth spreading through your chest. Happy. Unfiltered. You. It's been so long since you've felt... well, anything other than the constant pressure to be perfect, to meet everyone's expectations. But here, now, floating in this strange, wonderful haze, it's like all those worries have melted away.

You turn onto your side, facing Vada fully. Her hair is splayed out across the pillow, eyes half-lidded and glinting with mischief in the soft light. She looks ethereal, almost glowing, like some kind of pixie from another world. Your fingers twitch with the urge to reach out, to touch, to see if she's real.

"Vada," you murmur, not even sure what you want to say, just wanting to give voice to the swirl of emotions rising up inside you.

She looks at you, head tilting slightly, a small smile playing at the corners of her mouth. "Yeah?"

You bite your lip, suddenly feeling shy, exposed in a way that has nothing to do with the clothes you're (mostly) still wearing. "Thank you."

Her eyebrows raise in surprise, but her smile widens, turning soft and fond. "For what?"

"For... this." You gesture vaguely between the two of you. "For making me feel... I don't know, alive again? Like there's more to life than just... existing."

Vada's expression gentles, her hand coming up to cup your cheek, thumb brushing lightly over your skin. "You're welcome." She leans in closer, noses brushing, breath mingling. "You deserve to feel alive, you know. To actually live."

Your heart stutters in your chest, pulse thundering in your ears. She's so close, close enough to taste, to touch. Everywhere her skin meets yours feels electrified, buzzing with a strange, thrilling energy.

You jerk back, suddenly hyper-aware of how close Vada is, of the heat of her skin against yours, the softness of her breath on your face. Your heart's pounding, and it's not just from the lingering effects of the high. You press a hand to your chest, trying to steady yourself, to catch your breath.

"I, uh..." You swallow hard, brain scrambling to form coherent thoughts. "I think I need some water."

Vada blinks, looking almost startled by your sudden movement. She sits up slowly, running a hand through her hair, dislodging it from its messy bun. "Oh. Yeah, sure. I'll get you some."

She moves to swing her legs over the side of the bed, but you're already standing, stumbling slightly as you make your way towards the door. "No, it's okay. I'll get it. Just... just give me a minute."

You don't wait for her response, practically fleeing to the bathroom. Once inside, you lean against the closed door, breathing heavily. Your reflection in the mirror is a mess - flushed cheeks, wild eyes, hair sticking up in every direction. You look like you feel - utterly unmoored.

What is happening to you? These feelings, these urges... they're so new, so terrifying. You've never wanted anyone like this before, never felt this overwhelming need to touch, to taste, to...

You can't even finish the thought, because the very idea of acting on it sends a shiver down your spine, both thrilling and terrifying. You're not ready for this. You're not ready for her.

Are you?

You splash cold water on your face, trying to clear your head, to reassert control over your body and your thoughts. But even as you do, you can feel the pull of Vada in the other room, drawing you back like a magnet.

With a sigh, you straighten up, adjusting your clothes and running a hand through your hair in a vain attempt to tame it. You can't avoid this forever. Eventually, you'll have to face her, face these feelings. And maybe... maybe that's not such a bad thing.

You take a deep breath, trying to center yourself. The cold water has helped clear your head a bit, but your heart is still racing, your skin prickling with awareness. You can't avoid Vada forever - or these feelings. Whatever they are.

Squaring your shoulders, you exit the bathroom and head back to your room, steeling yourself for whatever comes next. Vada is still lounging on your bed where you left her, but she sits up when you enter, regarding you with a mixture of curiosity and concern.

"Hey," she says softly, patting the space beside her in invitation. "You okay?"

You hesitate, torn between the desire to flee and the need to confront this thing between you. But in the end, you find yourself drawn to her, like always. You cross the room and sink down onto the bed, careful to leave a bit of distance between you.

Vada watches you, head cocked, a small smile playing at her lips. "So. You wanna talk about it?"

Vada watches you carefully as you settle onto the bed beside her. Her eyes roam over your face, searching, trying to read your expression. You can feel the weight of her gaze, the intensity of her focus. It's both comforting and unnerving, knowing that she sees you so clearly, even the parts of yourself you try to hide.

"I'm fine," you say automatically, but the words ring hollow even to your own ears. Vada arches an eyebrow, clearly not buying it. She scoots a little closer, the warmth of her body seeping into your side. Her hand finds yours, fingers intertwining, grounding you.

"You know you can talk to me, right?" she says softly, her thumb rubbing circles on the back of your hand. "About anything. I'm here."

You swallow hard, throat suddenly tight with emotion. The sincerity in her voice, the earnest look in her eyes... it's almost too much. You've never had someone look at you like that before, like you're the only thing that matters in the world. It's thrilling and terrifying all at once.

"I know," you whisper, squeezing her hand. "I just... I don't really know what I'm feeling right now. Or what it means."

Vada hums thoughtfully, her free hand coming up to brush a stray lock of hair behind your ear. Her fingers linger on your cheek, the touch feather-light but electric. "Maybe it doesn't have to mean anything," she murmurs. "Maybe we can just... feel it. Together."

Vada's hand cups your cheek, her touch gentle but firm, holding you in place. Her eyes search yours, dark and intense, filled with a hunger you've never seen before. "We don't have to label it," she breathes, her thumb tracing the curve of your lower lip. "We don't have to plan for the future or worry about what comes next. We can just... be. Here. Now."

She leans in closer, her forehead resting against yours, breath mingling. Her free hand slides up your arm, leaving goosebumps in its wake. "Can we do that?" she whispers, her voice low and rough with emotion. "Can we just... feel? Together?"

The world seems to narrow down to this moment, to the feel of her skin against yours, the weight of her gaze, the promise in her words. Everything else fades away - the past, the future, all the fears and doubts that usually plague you. In this instant, there's only Vada, only the ache building in your chest, the longing for something you've never dared to want before.

Your heart pounds in your ears, drowning out any rational thought. You know you should pull away, should put some distance between you and the temptation she represents. But you can't seem to move, can't seem to break the spell she's cast over you.

Instead, you find yourself leaning in, drawn to her like a moth to a flame. Your eyes flutter closed, lips parting slightly in anticipation. You're trembling, but it's not from fear anymore. It's from the sheer, overwhelming desire to feel her, to lose yourself in her, consequences be damned.

"Yes," you breathe, the word barely audible even to your own ears. "Please."

Vada's breath hitches, and then she's closing the distance, her lips meeting yours in a searing kiss that sets your very soul alight. It's clumsy and desperate, fueled by weeks of pent-up longing and the lingering effects of the high. But it's also the most passionate, electrifying thing you've ever experienced.

Vada's lips are soft and demanding against yours, her tongue tracing the seam of your mouth, seeking entrance. You open for her willingly, a small moan escaping as she deepens the kiss, her hand sliding into your hair, gripping gently.

Your own hands roam over her back, mapping the dip of her spine, the curve of her shoulders. You've touched her before, but it's never felt like this - charged with electricity, heavy with intent. Every brush of skin against skin sends sparks racing through your veins, pooling hot and insistent in your core.

Vada breaks the kiss, pulling back just enough to look at you, pupils blown wide with desire. "You're so beautiful," she murmurs, voice low and rough. "I want to touch you everywhere."

Her words send a shiver down your spine, arousal coiling tight in your belly. You nod, too breathless to speak, giving her silent permission. Vada's hands slide lower, slipping under the hem of your shirt, skimming over the soft skin of your stomach.

You gasp as her fingers brush the waistband of your pants, teasing, promising. Your hips twitch involuntarily, seeking more contact, more friction. Vada smirks, fingers dipping lower, cupping you through the fabric.

"Fuck," you whimper, head falling back as she starts to stroke you, slow and deliberate. It's almost too much, the pleasure bordering on pain. You've never been this turned on before, never wanted someone so badly it hurts.

Vada's touch is electric, sending shockwaves of pleasure coursing through your body. Her fingers dance over the sensitive skin of your stomach, tracing patterns that make you shiver and gasp. When she cups you through your pants, you can't hold back the whimper that escapes your lips.

But even as the pleasure builds, you feel a flicker of fear. What if you can't perform? What if you disappoint her? The thought is enough to make your heart race, anxiety mingling with arousal in a confusing cocktail of emotions.

Vada seems to sense your hesitation. She pulls back slightly, searching your face with concern. "Hey," she murmurs, brushing a strand of hair from your forehead. "We don't have to rush. We can go slow, take our time."

You nod, trying to relax into her touch, to focus on the feel of her skin against yours rather than the nagging doubts in your mind. Vada's lips find your neck, pressing soft, open-mouthed kisses to your pulse point. It's distracting in the best possible way, chasing away the last of your anxiety.

She takes her time exploring your body, hands roaming, mapping every inch of you. Her touches are reverent, almost worshipful, like she's memorizing your shape, committing it to memory. It's overwhelming in the best possible way, making you feel cherished, desired.

When her hand slips into your pants, you're already half-hard, aching for more. Vada's touch is deft, confident, stroking you with just the right amount of pressure. You bite your lip, trying to stifle the moans that want to spill out, desperate to maintain some semblance of control.

But it's a losing battle. With each stroke, each kiss, each whispered word of praise, you feel yourself unraveling, surrendering to the pleasure she's building within you. Your hips rock into her hand, seeking more, chasing the bliss that's just out of reach.

Vada smiles against your skin, speeding up her movements, her thumb circling the sensitive head of your cock. "That's it," she purrs.

Vada's fingers continue their sensual dance, stroking and teasing until you're a writhing, whimpering mess beneath her. The pleasure builds, cresting, threatening to consume you whole. But just as you're about to go over the edge, Vada pulls away, leaving you bereft and aching.

"Wait," she giggles, eyes sparkling with mischief. "I think we forgot something important."

You blink up at her, hazy with desire, struggling to follow her train of thought. "What?" you manage, voice strained.

Vada grins, waggling her eyebrows suggestively. "The lube, silly!"

It takes a moment for her words to penetrate the fog of lust clouding your mind. Then, abruptly, you remember - and you burst out laughing, the absurdity of the situation hitting you full force.

"Shit!" you gasp, clutching your stomach as tears of mirth stream down your face. "Lube! Can't forget the lube!"

Vada joins in your laughter, collapsing beside you on the bed, both of you shaking with the force of it. It's a moment of pure, unadulterated hilarity amidst the passion, a reminder that even in the throes of desire, you can still find joy in the simple, silly things.

After a few moments, the laughter dies down, leaving you both breathless and grinning like fools. Vada props herself up on one elbow, looking down at you with a fond, amused expression. "Well," she says, still chuckling slightly, "I guess that's one way to take the edge off."

You snort, wiping tears from the corners of your eyes. "Definitely. Though I'm not sure my heart can handle any more excitement tonight."

"Oh, I don't know about that," Vada purrs, tracing a finger down your chest. "I'm not nearly done with you yet."

Despite yourself, you feel a fresh wave of arousal at her words, your body responding eagerly to her touch. "Is that so?" you tease, arching into her hand.

"Mm-hmm." Vada leans down, capturing your lips in a searing kiss. When she pulls back, her eyes are dark with renewed desire. "Now, where was I? Oh yes, the lube."

She rolls off the bed with exaggerated slowness, her movements slightly uncoordinated in a way that's endearing rather than clumsy. You watch her rummage through your nightstand, biting your lip to stifle another bout of giggles.

Finally, Vada emerges triumphant, brandishing a bottle of lube like a trophy. "Ta-da!" she announces, striking a dramatic pose.

You can't help but laugh again, shaking your head in affectionate exasperation. "You're ridiculous," you tell her, even as your heart swells with fondness.

"And you love it," Vada retorts, crawling back onto the bed and straddling your hips. She leans down, her face inches from yours, eyes shining with mirth and desire. "Now, where were we?"

You smile up at her, reaching up to cup her face, thumb brushing over her cheekbone. "I believe I was about to make sweet, sloppy love to me."

Vada's grin widens, turning wicked. "Mm, I do love it when you talk dirty."

You shift positions, gently guiding Vada to lie back against the pillows. She goes willingly, a soft smile playing on her lips as she watches you through half-lidded eyes. You take a moment to appreciate the sight of her spread out before you, hair fanned across the pillow, skin flushed and glowing in the soft light.

Slowly, almost reverently, you lift the hem of your oversized shirt and pull it over your head, tossing it aside. Vada's gaze rakes over your body, appreciative and hungry. You feel a thrill run through you at the intensity of her stare, the raw desire in her eyes.

You shimmy out of your pants, kicking them off the bed, leaving you bare and exposed. Vada reaches for you, but you gently push her hands away, wanting to be the one to touch, to explore.

You reach for the lube, slicking your fingers, before trailing your hand up Vada's thigh, pushing her legs apart. She goes readily, opening herself to you completely.

You circle her entrance with a fingertip, teasing, before slowly pressing inside. Vada gasps, her back arching off the bed, a moan spilling from her lips. Her walls flutter around your finger, hot and tight, drawing you deeper.

You work a second finger in alongside the first, scissoring, stretching her. Vada rocks her hips, meeting your movements, urging you on. Her hands find your shoulders, nails digging in, anchoring herself to you.

"Please," she pants, voice high and needy. "I need you."

Vada's words send a bolt of pure need straight to your core. She's so honest, so open in her desire, and it only fuels your own. You can't wait another second to be inside her, to feel her wrapped around you, skin to skin.

You quickly slick your cock, positioning yourself at her entrance. Vada looks up at you, eyes dark with lust, trust, and something deeper, more profound. In this moment, she's giving herself to you completely, body and soul. It's both thrilling and humbling.

With a slow, steady pressure, you push forward, breaching her, feeling her tight heat envelop you inch by delicious inch. Vada's breath hitches, a sharp gasp escaping her lips at the initial stretch. Her hands grip your shoulders, blunt nails digging into your skin.

"Wait," she manages, voice tight with strain. "Go slow."

You pause, swallowing hard, fighting the urge to thrust deeper, harder. You take a deep breath, forcing yourself to focus, to be gentle. Vada's comfort, her pleasure, is all that matters right now.

Vada's breath comes in short, sharp gasps as you push forward, her inner muscles fluttering around your length. It's a tight fit, almost uncomfortable, but the discomfort is quickly overwhelmed by the sheer, overwhelming pleasure of being inside her, skin to skin, heart to heart.

"Fuck," Vada whimpers, her hands scrabbling at your back, nails digging into your skin. "You feel so big."

The praise goes straight to your head, making you feel powerful, desirable, like the most attractive person in the world. You want to preen, to crow, to show off for her. But more than that, you want to make her feel good, to give her the same pleasure she's giving you.

So you start to move, slow and gentle, rocking into her with shallow thrusts. Vada moans beneath you, her legs wrapping around your waist, urging you deeper. You comply, increasing your pace, your depth, until you're buried to the hilt inside her.

The sensation is indescribable, like coming home, like finding a piece of yourself you never knew was missing. You feel complete, whole, like you were always meant to be here, now, with her.

Vada clings to you, her face buried in the crook of your neck, breath hot against your skin. Her hips rise to meet yours, matching your rhythm, driving you both towards the edge. The wet sounds of your bodies moving together fill the room, obscene and erotic, spurring you on.

"Harder," Vada pants in your ear, her voice ragged with need. "Please, I need more."

You comply, picking up the pace, thrusting into her with deep, powerful strokes. The bed creaks beneath you, the headboard slamming against the wall, but you barely notice. All that exists is Vada, her body, her touch, her pleasure.

She cries out, nails raking down your back, leaving stinging trails in their wake. The pain only heightens your arousal, pushing you closer to the brink. Your balls tighten, your cock throbbing inside her, signaling your impending release.

Vada's walls flutter around you, signaling her own peak. "I'm close," she whimpers, her legs tightening around your waist. "Don't stop, please don't stop."

You can feel her body tensing, her breath coming in sharp, shallow gasps. You reach between you, finding her clit, rubbing tight circles. Vada keens, her back arching off the bed, her inner muscles clamping down on your cock like a vice.

"Yes, fuck, just like that," she babbles, her words dissolving into incoherent moans. "Oh god, oh fuck, I'm gonna... I'm..."

Her orgasm crashes over her like a tidal wave, her body shaking, convulsing beneath you. The feel of her coming undone, the knowledge that you brought her to this peak of pleasure, is enough to push you over the edge.

With a guttural groan, you bury yourself deep inside her, your own release pulsing through you in hot, intense waves. You collapse on top of her, spent, boneless, your face buried in her neck.

For a long moment, you simply breathe, trying to come down from the high of your shared climax.

—

The classroom is abuzz with the usual chatter of students, the scratching of pencils on paper, the occasional cough or rustle of notebooks. You sit at your desk, focused on the lesson, trying to ignore the lingering ache in your muscles from your recent activities with Vada.

Suddenly, the door swings open, and Vada stumbles in, her hair disheveled, her eyes glassy and unfocused. She's wearing the same clothes from last night, rumpled and wrinkled, and you can smell the distinct aroma of weed wafting off her.

The teacher pauses mid-sentence, eyebrows raised in surprise. "Miss Cavell?" he questions, his tone a mix of confusion and mild reprimand.

Vada blinks, her head tilting as she tries to process the question. "Huh?" she mumbles, her words slurred.

A few of your classmates snicker, exchanging knowing looks. Whispers start to circulate, speculating about Vada's state and the reason for her disruption.

You feel your face heat, a mixture of embarrassment and fear. What if someone figures out what you and Vada have been up to? What if word gets out about your... activities?

The teacher clears his throat, his gaze flicking between Vada and the rest of the class. "Perhaps you'd like to share with us what's on your mind, Miss Cavell?"

Vada giggles, the sound high and slightly manic. She sways on her feet, her hand coming up to cover her mouth, stifling another burst of laughter.

The tension in the room is palpable, everyone waiting to see what she'll do next. You hold your breath, your heart pounding in your chest, praying silently that she'll keep quiet, that she won't say anything to expose your secret.

The teacher's eyes narrow, his patience wearing thin. He gestures to the door, his tone firm. "Miss Cavell, I think it's best if you leave and return when you're feeling better."

Vada's head snaps up, her eyes focusing on the teacher for the first time. She blinks, a slow, lazy smile spreading across her face. "But I just got here," she pouts, her words slightly slurred. "I don't wanna leave."

A few more snickers ripple through the classroom, the other students amused by Vada's antics. The teacher, however, is not impressed. He points to the door again, more insistently this time.

Vada sighs, her shoulders slumping in defeat. She turns to leave, but not before her gaze lands on you. “Can I grab Y/N for a few seconds?”

The teacher hesitates, his brow furrowing as he considers Vada's request. The classroom falls silent, everyone holding their breath, waiting for his decision.

After a long moment, he sighs, his shoulders slumping in resignation. "Fine," he relents, his tone grudging. "But make it quick. We have a lot to cover today."

Vada grins, her eyes sparkling with mischief. She saunters over to your desk, her hips swaying, her steps slightly unsteady. She leans down, her face mere inches from yours, her breath hot against your skin.

"Hey there, gorgeous," she purrs, her voice low and seductive. "Wanna ditch this boring class and come have some fun with me?"

Your heart races, your palms sweating as you try to formulate a response. You glance around the room, seeing the curious and disapproving looks from your classmates, the stern disapproval on the teacher's face.

But despite the potential consequences, you can't help but be drawn in by Vada's magnetic presence, her infectious energy, her promise of adventure. You feel yourself nodding before you can even think better of it.

Vada's grin widens, her eyes lighting up with triumph. "Perfect," she whispers, her hand sliding down your arm, her fingers intertwining with yours. "Let's blow this joint."

Before you can change your mind, she's tugging you to your feet, leading you towards the door. You can feel the weight of your classmates' stares on your back, hear the murmurs and whispers following you as you leave.

But all of that fades away as soon as you step into the hallway, the door closing behind you with a resounding thud. Vada pulls you close, her arms wrapping around your waist, her face buried in your neck.

"That was so hot," she murmurs, her words muffled against your skin. "Watching you squirm, knowing what we did last night... Fuck, I'm getting turned on just thinking about it."

As Vada pulls you close, her body pressed against yours, you feel a flicker of excitement mixed with apprehension. The thrill of sneaking away, of doing something forbidden, sends a rush of adrenaline through your veins. But before you can fully give in to the moment, a sharp voice cuts through the air.

"What's going on here?"

You jump apart, your heart leaping into your throat as you turn to face the principal, her eyes narrowed, her arms crossed over her chest. Vada, on the other hand, seems completely unfazed, a lazy grin spreading across her face.

Fuck.

[seresinhangmanjake]

Daddy!Benny Cross x Momma!Reader

Your and Benny’s little girl gets injured playing on a bike and must go to the hospital. Benny doesn’t handle it well.

Warnings/Notes: mention of broken bones, cursing, angry but sweet dad Benny, protectiveness, typos, and I think that’s it.

Part of the Come Back Knockin’ universe. Takes place after Come Back Together and Together and More, but you don't have to read these beforehand to understand this fic.

Words: 1250

Benny Cross Masterlist

Benny’s going to lose his damn mind—that’s all you can think as you stand beside Wahoo in the hospital lobby, the both of you keeping sharp eyes out the wall-length windows to spot your husband. Facing him will be no easy feat and you need all the time you can get to prepare yourselves before he stomps through those doors. 

“Wahoo, I don't know about this. You really better go back to the meeting,” you encourage him, as you’ve done at least ten times in the last fifteen minutes. 

“Nah, I gotta stay and apologize to ‘im,” he replies. “But you shouldn’t have to wait here with me. You should go be with your girl.”

Your eyes scan the visible area from the benches in the flowered courtyard to the emergency sign attached to the building’s exterior brick before darting to the looped driveway reserved for ambulances. He’s nowhere in sight. But he will be soon enough. You called him—you peek at your watch—exactly twelve minutes and forty-three seconds ago. The shop is nineteen minutes away from the hospital and there’s no way he’s not speeding. 

“If I go, who is going to stop Benny from killing you?” you say, your heart hammering in your chest. 

You love your husband, but the man has a temper that can flare as easily as a swift strike of a match. He has started many short-lived fights, always requiring some patching up before the excitement finally settles down, but if Benny is given time to simmer, he can explode with an unrivaled rage.

Wahoo chuckles awkwardly, turning his head to look at you. 

“You got a point there, sweetheart,” he says. Then he goes silent amongst the background chattering of anxious families and ringing phone lines at the front desk.

You glance his way just in time to see the harsh bob of his Adam’s apple. 

“I won’t let him,” you promise. “You know…kill you.”

“Not sure you’re gonna be able to stop ‘im. You and the kid are the most important things in his world, and one of yous got hurt on my watch.”

A wince pinches your face at the memory and you’re so busy worrying about how the events of the next few minutes are going to unfold that you miss Benny’s entrance entirely. 

“What the fuck!” Benny shouts. It echoes throughout the room, making every head swivel, every conversation cease. 

As he storms closer, you step between him and Wahoo, your hands planting firmly on his chest. Murder is in his glare and though he could easily barrel through the barrier in his path, that would involve shoving you aside, and regardless of the circumstances, he would never do that.

Benny’s arm raises over your shoulder, finger pointed like a dagger toward his friend—well, enemy, at the moment. “What the hell you doin’ lettin’ my four-year-old on your fuckin’ bike!”

He tries to side-step you but you’re watching his feet, catching his movements before he can finish making them. 

“I’m real sorry, Benny,” Wahoo says meekly.

“Sorry? You’re sorry!” His tone is darker, fists clenching, anger overflowing and spilling onto the tiled floor. Without glancing at you, in a much softer—but still threatening—voice, he says, “Baby, move.”

You look up at him. Your hands slide from his chest to cup his cheeks in a failed effort to trap his attention. “Benny, it was an accident, ok? Alright? She was just playing pretend like she does with you and she wiggled out of his grasp and landed wrong,” you tell him. 

“I don't fuckin’ care if it was an accident.”

He’s so revved up, so locked in on his target, that your stomach twists for Wahoo. He’s been such a kind man and he’s so good with your daughter that he’s told you once or twice he wishes he could have one of his own someday.

When Lucy fell, it took all of two seconds for his visibly consuming guilt to settle in. He’d immediately picked her up, buckled her into your car, and followed you straight to the hospital where he has stressed over her injured state from the moment of arrival. He doesn’t deserve the abuse from Benny as if he was negligent. Benny, a man who regularly demonstrates little of his own self-preservation skills, but happens to go feral when his child so much as skins her knee. 

“Move.”

“Benny, please,” you say. “Honey, look at me.”

If you can get his eyes on you then he’ll be stuck to you like glue. He’ll calm down. The huffing and puffing of his chest will slow. 

And to your relief, when you stand up on your toes to invade his line of sight that is exactly what happens. The vengeance drains out of his face, replaced by a gentleness that only ever reveals itself to you and your shared child. 

“She’s fine,” you say. “She cried until the doctor gave her a sucker and now I’m not sure she even cares about her arm.”

Benny’s mouth dips into a frown. His brow pinches, then his teeth bite down hard on his bottom lip. “She got hurt,” he says, and your heart breaks for him.

You sigh. “I know.”

“I wasn’t there.”

“You wouldn’t have been able to stop it even if you were. It happened in a split-second,” you tell him. “You’re here now; that’s what matters. And wouldn’t you rather see her than argue?”

Benny’s exhale is a sharp release of air that subdues the remnants of his temper. “Where is she?”

You point to the double doors off to the side of the lobby. “Through there,” you say.

Benny swallows, nods, and takes your hand. But when he looks up, the glare resurfaces. “You're not gettin’ off,” he tells Wahoo. “I’ll deal with you later.”

As Benny pulls you along in the direction of your daughter, you quickly whisper to your friend, “I'll take care of it, but you ought to go.”

Wahoo’s smile is weak, never reaching his eyes, and his hands slip into his jeans pockets before he turns on his heel for the exit.

---

“Daddy!”

Lucy hops up from the floor where a few toys are scattered about from playing with the nurse in your absence. 

Benny plasters on a smile that barely conceals his agitation as he scoops her up in his arms. “You doin’ alright, nugget?”

“Mhmm,” Lucy hums, chipper as ever. “I finished my sucker. It tasted like grape.” She lifts her arm and Benny’s head jerks back to avoid a collision with his nose. “You like my cast?” 

You watch Benny struggle to come up with a positive reply, considering that within said cast is his little baby’s broken arm. “Y-Yea, Lu. It’s…It’s real great.”

“It’s blue!”

“I see that.”

The nurse chuckles as she rises from the floor and dusts invisible specks of dirt from her pristinely white uniform. “You’ve got yourself a lovely little girl,” she praises, tilting her head affectionately as he takes in the image of Lucy tucking her head into the crook of Benny’s neck. “The doctor says we’ll need to see you back here in six weeks.”

“Thank you.”   

She starts toward the door but pauses as she passes your daughter. ���Goodbye, miss Lucy,” she says, her smile wide. 

“Bye, miss nurse!” With her good hand, Lucy gives an animated wave that the nurse returns as she closes the door behind her. 

Benny releases the sigh you’re pretty sure he’s been holding in since you called him. He cups the side of Lucy's head as if he could cradle her closer than she already is.

“You're not gonna be sittin’ up on any bikes for a real long while,” he says.

Lucy’s head shoots up, eyes widening in panic. “Nooo!” she whines. “You can't stop me!” 

“You wanna bet?”

“Yes!” she snaps back. “I…I'll do it when you aren't lookin'!”

Benny scoffs. "I'm not lettin' you out of my sight."

"I'll be real sneaky!"

The air of rebelliousness is all too familiar and it makes you snicker. Because despite the exhaustion of the day, despite the tears and the shouting and the drama that you hope will not reemerge later, all you can think as the bantering unfolds before you is that that little girl is definitely Benny Cross’s daughter.

---

Thanks for reading :)

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[natalievoncatte]

Lena felt something crumble inside her. Kara was sitting in the Tower, head bowed and arms resting on her thighs, staring at her own hands. Her cape lay unclasped and thrown haphazardly over the back of the couch, and it was covered in scorch marks like the rest of her. Her new sleeveless suit revealed bruises running up and down her arms, already fading to a sicky yellow.

Alex let out a low sigh of relief as she removed the bomb collar from Lena’s neck and gently placed it in a sealed container, which J’onn immediately took and flew directly out of the tower. When he returned he said, gravely, “Kara. You can let go now.”

Lena looked away from the gruesome sight as Kara released the contents of her hands and let out a choking sob.

“He made me. He made me.”

Alex took the… the…

Well. They called it a dead man’s switch for a reason.

There was a heavy pause.

“Give me the room,” said Lena.

“Lena,” Alex admonished, “we need to get you cleaned up, make sure you’re okay, that the gas didn’t-“

“Please?”

Lena looked at her with pleading eyes and Alex relented at once, brushing at her own, swiping back angry tears. Lena knew what would happen: Alex would pummel the hell out of a heavy bag and then go home to Kelly.

Kara would have to bear this herself.

Alex put a hand on Nia’s shoulder and motion for J’onn to join her and left Lena with Kara.

Lena stood and crossed the room to the sink, finding the biggest bowl she could and a wash cloth. Taking it, she knelt in front of Kara and very gently took her right hand and began washing away the blood.

Kara said nothing. The water soon turned pink, flicked with bits of blood too dry to dilute. It took a lot of effort to get all of it off, especially clingy bits in the creases of her palms and knuckles.

Kara stared at her clean hands.

“It shouldn’t be that easy,” Kara rasped. “I took a man’s life tonight.”

Lena shifted to sit on the floor in front of her and brushed back her hair, running her hand gently over the fuzzy side that Kara had recently buzzed. She tucked the longer locks on the other side back and behind her ear.

“Look at me.”

Kara met her gaze, eyes wet with tears.

“You did what you had to do.”

“How could he be so stupid?” Kara whimpered. “I couldn’t do the things he was demanding. I couldn’t hurt people for him.”

“I know.”

Kara fell back against the sofa and pounded her thigh her with her fist, and Lena felt the impact in her chest. Kara winced and looked down at her.

Lena lifted herself up and sat down beside Kara.

“I know what this feels like.”

There was a brief flash of confusion on Kara’s face, then… “Lex.”

Lena nodded. “I killed my brother to protect you, and I’d do it again.”

“I should have found another way,” Kara whispered. “I’m always supposed to find another way. I just… I just snapped. When he said he’d let go and set off the bomb on your neck, I didn’t even think, I just…”

She looked down at her hands.

“I’m a killer.”

Lena took Kara’s hand in both of hers and lifted it, always amazed how the strongest being in the solar system just… let her. She brought Kara’s palm to her cheek and rested against it, letting Kara’s warm fingers curl tenderly against her skin.

“Maybe. I won’t tell you that you’re not, but that’s not all you are. You’ve given so much, sacrificed so much, endured so much pain, and you’ve always been so wise and kind with your power. Lots of people would have gone down a darker path with the gifts that you have. I would have.”

“You never went down the path. You came back. You came back to me.”

“I always will.”

Kara’s face fell and the crying began in earnest. Lena pulled her in and carded through her hair with her fingers and whisper-sang a half remembered Gaelic lullaby from her mother while Kara let it out.

“I can’t live without you,” Kara admitted. “I tried it once and it was hell.”

“I know exactly what you mean.”

“Lena, I lo-“

“Shhhh,” Lena whispered. “I know, darling. I know you do, and I do too… but don’t say it now. Not like this, not because of this, not now. Wait for a happy time. Maybe tomorrow, maybe the day after, when we wake up.”

“I’ve wanted to for so long, but I was so scared.”

“I know, I know, Kara. It’ll be alright. Everything will be alright and you can do it right, when we’re both ready.”

“Okay,” Kara choked out, “but I can’t wait so long. I waited too long already and I want to keep you forever.”

Lena smiled, pressing her cheek to the crown of Kara’s head.

“Well, when you get around to asking me I’m sure I’ll say yes.”

That worked, it seemed to calm her. It took a while before the hitching stopped and Kara could sit up and walk to drink a glass of water, before the layers and layers of armor she’d built up around her fragile soul were starting to raise themselves again.

She made good on her promise, though, pressing a ting Kryptonian phrase into Lena’s ear as they lay curled in a mound of comforters and blankets in the sun in Kara’s loft.

[hannieehaee]

MAIN THING (teaser)

18+ / mdi

summary: after years of insistence from soonyoung, he finally convinces resident social butterfly seungkwan to introduce him to his unrequited crush; a fellow idol at hybe who he has not been able to take his eyes off since moving to the company.

content: idol!hoshi x hybeidol!reader, simp!hoshi, he's down horribly bad, seungkwan is fed up with hoshi, afab reader, smut, oral (m receiving), penetrative sex, etc.

(^ no actual content warnings in the teaser)

wc: 746 (teaser); 11k (full fic)

RELEASE DATE: june 14th

or you can check it out on my ko-fi or patreon today by subscribing to either one!

a/n: time for more horrendously down bad hoshi

masterlist

"Just introduce me to her. Please," whined Soonyoung for the nth time that week.

"I already said no! Just go talk to her yourself like a normal person," rebutted Seungkwan, attempting but failing at disregarding his insistent friend.

"He can't do that. Last time they made eye contact he ran to hide behind Mingyu," snickered Jeonghan, invested in this conversation whenever it was brought up.

"I just need you to get the ball rolling. Please, Kwan-ah," he pleaded as he got up in Seungkwan's personal space – a thing everyone knew not to do.

Rolling his eyes, he sighed, "She already knows who you are, you know. There's no need to introduce you," he muttered under his breath.

"Wait, what. She does? Like knows knows me? Or just knows of Hoshi of Seventeen?", his eyes widened in shock, grabbing onto Seungkwan's shoulders to get his full attention.

"She knows Kwon Soonyoung, dumbass. She's one of my closest friends, why wouldn't she know of you?", he grumbled, attempting to shake off his friend.

Soonyoung sighed at the short-lived hope he had of you having maybe taken an interest to him and brought him up in conversation with Seungkwan, just to have confirmation (yet again) of you simply knowing him as Seungkwan's groupmate.

It had been two, no, three years since Soonyoung had first developed a special interest in you. Thinking back to when Pledis was first acquired by Hybe, Soonyoung still remembered the first time he saw you in person very vividly.

Instantly, he developed a crush on you from the very first glance, only falling further any time you'd cross paths in the building.

He had known of your existence before that, of course, but had never truly acknowledged his obvious crush on you until he first met you in person.

Unfortunately for Soonyoung, he was far too shy and introverted to ever actually engage in conversation with you, much less slide his way into your life the way Seungkwan so easily had – Seungkwan, who had become one of your closest friends. On the contrary, Soonyoung would actively go out of his way to avoid you, never even so much as making eye contact whenever Seungkwan would bring you around.

It was easy for him to become the mockery of the members due to this. Leave it to him to have his years-long crush become best friends with one of his best friends, leading him to your constant, nerve-wracking proximity.

At some point he decided that maybe he should break out of his shell – the shell he had created specifically to shield himself from his feelings for you. He decided that instead of avoiding you, he'd do the next best thing ... which was to ask Seungkwan to officially re-introduce you to each other.

You were blissfully unaware of Soonyoung's crush, he knew that much. Did you know of his existence? Barely, as you'd only interacted a handful of times, with those always being brief and impersonal interactions. This gave Soonyoung the perfect opportunity to start brand new with you. Except he'd need the help of his most extroverted friend, who just so happened to be your best friend.

After begging Seungkwan to please work his social butterfly magic on him, he found himself unsuccessful. Seungkwan would merely scoff and tell him to grow up, leading Soonyoung to be mocked by one of the other eleven members, and then the cycle would repeat. Currently, it was Jeonghan's turn to snicker at Soonyoung's misery, it seemed.

Taking note of Soonyoung's pouty lips and saddened demeanor, Jeonghan took pity on him and clapped his hands decisively before speaking up again.

"Okay, how about you let Hoshining here take your place in doing the TikTok challenge for maestro with Y/N? If they hit it off, then you've done your due diligence, and if not, Soonie can just go get fucked. Everybody wins," he suggested as he shrugged at Seungkwan.

Soonyoung lit up at this, choosing to completely disregard the last two sentences of his suggestion. This was more than enough for him to get the ball rolling.

Immediately joining in on the plan, he turned to Seungkwan once more, ready to beg again.

"Don't say anything," Seungkwan shushed him with a lift of his finger, opposite hand now digging into his temple in what Soonyoung hoped to simply be exaggerated annoyance, "I'll do it, just, please grant me twenty minutes of silence," he pleaded.

That worked well enough for Soonyoung.

...

you can check it out today on my ko-fi or patreon by subscribing to either one!

[beloveds-embrace]

I’m not sure if you’re taking anymore requests but can you do poly141 who finds a small fairy reader? Mystical reader so little she fits in their hands?

Tiny baby reader… yes. Fair warning i wrote this while sleepy and tired and i completely forgot to add in when reader learns their name 😭 sorry for any more mistakes!

The forest was unusually quiet, blanketed in mist that made every breath feel cool and crisp. It was the kind of morning that seemed unremarkable, easy to forget. They walked carefully along the narrow path, hunting gear packed away in favor of simple jackets and quiet conversation. Retirement had given them, once a formidable task force, the luxury of slow days, but old habits died hard; their senses remained keen, always searching for any change in the air.

And that’s when they saw it- a flicker of light, faint and trembling, deep within a thicket. It could have been a trick of the morning sun, but they hadn’t survived as long as they have by chalking up everything strange, unusual think to happenstance.

“Careful.” John murmured, voice low and commanding. They nodded, pushing through the brush with quiet purpose and carefulness, until the glimmer came into focus.

There, tangled in a web of thin brambles, was something neither war nor time had ever prepared them for- a tiny, shimmering, actually-real fairy, no larger than the palm of a hand. Your wings, gossamer-thin and glowing with iridescent light, fluttered weakly as you tried to free you. You turned your head, eyes wide and filled with a mix of fear and exhaustion, and they all felt their breath catch.

Soap was the first to recover. “Bloody hell,” he whispered, his voice tinged with awe. He took a cautious step forward, hands up as if approaching a skittish animal. He couldn’t believe his eyes, but you are real. You are actually real. “Hey now, it’s okay. We’re not gonna hurt ya.”

The fairy- you -watched him warily, but there was a flicker of hope in your gaze. Gaz crouched next to Johnny, brows furrowed. “We need to get her out of there,” he said, his voice gentle. “Quickly.”

Johnny nodded, already reaching into his pack for a small knife. “Don’t move, all right, wee one? We’ll get you free.” He kept his movements slow, mindful of how fragile you seemed. With careful precision, he began cutting away the brambles, each snip bringing a little more freedom and a little more light. Price and Ghost kept watch over them, cautious still but not really that worried considering your size.

When you were finally free, you collapsed, too weak to stay upright. Gaz caught you, cradling you in his hands as if you were made of glass. “You’re safe now.” he murmured, his eyes soft. He could feel the faint warmth of your glow against his skin, like holding a tiny ember. More proof that you are real, even if it seemed so impossible.

Your wings twitched, and with a shaky breath, you looked up at them. “Thank…you,” you whispered, your voice barely more than a sweet chime in the wind.

“You are talking,” Soap breathed, a childlike wonder lighting up his face. “You talk.” It makes you giggle just a little, if you are honest with yourself. Your wings attempt to flutter behind you, but they are not Quite Right. You shift on your feet, visibly unsure now.

John stepped closer, his gaze warm but measured, and bent down so his face was at the same level as your body. “Easy there. You’ve been through a lot, haven’t you?” His thumb, calloused from years of wielding weapons, gently brushed a stray leaf from your hair. He had to be extra careful, extra slow so as to not alarm you, and then holds his hand out for you to step into. “Your wings aren’t moving right, are they? We can help you.”

You shake your head slowly to his first question, looking away from his eyes. You’d never really approached humans before… always too big and scary, but there four were nice, at the very least. You and your unique magic couldn’t sense anything particularly bad from them, so that’s why you hadn’t immediately tried to fly far, far away from them.

You lean into John’s touch, sitting down and holding onto his thumbs for stability. You do know out of all of them, you still haven’t heard the masked one speak, just felt him bore his gaze at you, but you don’t care. “Where… are we going?” You ask instead.

“Near our cottage,” Price said, voice low and soothing. “Not far. We can bring you there, get you warm and fed, and you can let your wings rest there.”

You nodded slowly, exhaustion overcoming you. John held you close while they comtinued walking back. As you rested, your glow dimmed to a soft warmth that seeped into his palms and made them glow, a quiet reminder of your presence. The journey back was filled with silent glances- each man marveling at the fact that something so otherworldly, so impossibly delicate, had chosen to trust them.

When they arrived at the cottage, Soap carefully laid out a small, soft cloth on the table, creating a makeshift bed for you to rest one while Kyle thought you’d enjoy having a different option, so he placed a leafy pot nearby for yoh. Ghost silently set a thimble of water nearby while John stirred a pot on the stove, filling the room with a comforting aroma. You drank slowly, savoring every drop and feeling strength return to your body, to your wings.

“Better?” Ghost asked you at last, voice low, his eyes never leaving you. You nodded, a grateful smile breaking across your face despite the hints of fear caused by his mask. You didn’t see it, but there was a collective untensing of shoulders, worry lessening.

Over the next few hours, you spoke in halting words, telling them of the storm that had torn through the woods and separated you from your kin. They listened with full attention, not interrupting you. Kyle even offered you a finger to lean on when you shivered a little, reminded of the pain while you recounted your tale. But after that, you continue your rest, now the one asking them questions and learning who they are.

By evening, you were still nestled in the soft, makeshift bed near the fire, your wings catching the flickering light. As you drifted into a peaceful sleep, your light grew stronger- very content in your warm spot, and feeling safe and secure from wild animals and the weather outside. Occasionally, you feel different hands and fingers brush across your head, and each time it makes you let out a happy squeak, uncaring for the conversations happening in the background.

You wonder if they’d let you stay with them…