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coalitiongirl · 3 years ago

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Fic Recs (under 300 edition)

So I wanted to get back to reading Swan Queen fic regularly, and I asked people to rec longfic that they'd read (not written) and loved that had fewer than 300 kudos! I haven’t read most of these, but I’ve collected them here so y’all can go through the list and discover some new fics with me! Please try to kudos and review every fic that you read! It means the world to the writers and will keep em writing, and then we all win. 😁

Atonement by SgtMac (M): With Regina's magical heart failing thanks to years of previous evil, Emma and Regina and Henry (and Granny!) set out to save her life by traveling to the Enchanted Forest and requesting help from ancient magical beings known as the Guardians. Given a mission as simple as it is impossible - to achieve atonement by creating peace - the ladies find themselves joining a rebellion and fighting for the very soul of the Enchanted Forest all while trying to help Regina to understand that the self-loathing and guilt which have driven most of her actions don't have to doom her chance for a new beginning or even, a chance to live and love again. A S4(ish) SQ love story set against the turmoil of war and the chaotic savagery of the old world.

Blood and Sand by cheshire6845 (E): A/U The Savior is a slave forced into the role of fighting as a gladiator for the House of Hearts. The odds are against her survival as she will have to win in the arena, navigate Cora's schemes, outlast a general's vengeance, and not be killed out of spite by the current House of Hearts Champion - Regina the Undefeated. This story follows the major plot points of Starz Spartacus with some twists along the way.

But what if there was no time by KizuRai (M): When she wakes up, it's dark. She can't move, she can't see, she can't feel and she can't hear. Where am I? She feels a forceful oppression, pressing her down, draining her of her energy and she's powerless to stop it. How did I get here? The question of here is relative, she's not even sure where here is. What happened? There must be some reason for being stuck here but her memory is fuzzy, like all her thoughts are being sifted through a filter. Who am I? She's not sure if she actually exists or she suddenly became sentient in the darkness.She hears a voice reverberating in the distance, it's distorted and quiet but she hears it all the same. It breaks the monotony of the silence. Someone's coming for her, they will get her out. She's just not sure she wants them to as the price might be too great.

Finding Home by evl_rgl (T): “I wanted to remember you so badly that I pulled back your cursed town just so that the memories would make sense. I needed you so badly that even when I had no memory of you, I still tried to find you.” Regina gave Emma and Henry memories of a happy life together before they fled Pan’s curse, leaving them with no memories of their lives in Storybrooke. However, when the memory spell shows signs of failing, threatening to rip apart the minds of both Emma and Henry, Regina makes a drastic choice to go back and fix it, understanding that it will mean living alone in a world where her son doesn’t know her. Was the spell really faulty, though? (swanqueen)

Five Flames by MariaComet (U): In the past, Emma Nolan disconnected from her peers in high school, preferring to keep to herself. In her sophomore year of high school, she decided to try and join the boy’s wrestling team because she was bored. She didn’t expect herself to become the champion of the most bullied kid in school or the secret best friend of the school queen. She also didn’t expect to join a club that would change her life. In the present, Emma is trying to cope with a humiliating loss in her martial arts career. She claims to be “training” but is stuck in limbo between wanting to retire and try again. She is isolated from her former best friend, Regina Mills, a local celebrity chef and the rest of her old friends. When one of them calls her with an idea to honor their deceased teacher, she is confronted with unresolved feelings and questions about how powerful love truly is.

A Glamour of Truth by PrincessCharming (T): After 2x10, Regina uses magic to show Emma the obvious truth. A tentative trust forms between them amid hilarious bickering. With Emma's help, Regina struggles to regain a place in her son's life... until Cora arrives, wanting her daughter back. Pieces of Regina's past emerge showing that the board was set long before the game started. The final battle begins soon.

His Dark Materials 'verse by MoonlitMidnight (M): A modern Alternate Universe in which Dæmons (the external physical manifestation of a person's 'inner self' that takes the form of an animal) are present. In which Emma and Regina have led slightly different lives and they make slightly different choices.

How Many Miles to Avalon? (WIP) by RavenOutlander (E): Regina would do anything to save Emma from the darkness and bring her back home safe and sound. Even put up with the two idiots, Captain Guyliner and a bunch of dwarves she decidedly wanted to drop off at the nearest exit. But in their search for Emma, they find that she might not need that much saving after all. Caught up in a search for the infamous Philosopher Stone, an all out war between DunBroch and Camelot, and ghosts from the past to haunt her every waking moment, Regina finds herself scrambling to keep her and her family's happy endings from falling apart.

The Hyperion by FrankenSpine (M): After wishing upon what she believes is a shooting star, Emma Swan finds herself aboard the Hyperion, the royal starship of an alien Queen from a faraway galaxy. She quickly learns of the tensions between the Queen's people and her own, but the Queen takes an interest in her and agrees to take her away from Earth forever. Adventure awaits. *(Loosely based on Guardians of the Galaxy with just a hint of Farscape)*

If Wishes Came True (It Would've Been You) by Angeii_K (M): After Regina films a guest appearance on her friend Neal’s popular show, he invites her to spend the weekend with him and his girlfriend. What she never expected was to actually like the woman. Sparks fly between the two, which results in them questioning everything and making choices they will later regret. 4 years later, they meet again in the most unexpected of ways. Now co-stars on the same show, they are forced to work through the emotions from their last encounter. What will happen next? Only time will tell.

The King Doesn’t Have To Know (WIP) by highheelsandchocolate (M): The White Knight had never seen anyone like her before: the Queen was nothing short of mesmerizing. Her possessive yet neglectful husband, however, was another thing entirely.

The Lich by Dangereaux (M): Gay disaster Emma, exasperated Regina, and a monster. A Halloween special.

Maybe if We Close Our Eyes we Can Reach the Stars by wellthizizdeprezzing (T): Emma is a lonely astronaut. Regina is an adventuring alien. Their paths cross leading them onto a journey of new discovery. Between galaxies and many miles of cold black space, despite not speaking the same language, they manage to fall for each other. An out of this world love story.

A prisoner long forgotten by sugarsweet_19 (M): ‘I wish I had a child as white as snow, as red as blood and as black as the wood of the window-frame. Soon after she had a little girl, who was as white as snow, with lips as red as blood and with her hair as black as the ebony of the window-frame. She was therefore called Snow-white.” This is how our story starts but how will it end?The evil queen as been locked up in a tower and forgotten that is until princess Emma looks for a place to hid from her parents after they tell her she has to marry Neal the son of the dark one.

Revenge of the Three Little Pigs by mskyo (M): Regina and Emma find themselves alone and looking for the rest of their party. The Evil Queen must face the consequences of her past actions. Will Emma come to her aid, or understand that justice must be served... *Some chapters have fairly graphic sex, and violence*

Things I Almost Remember by cheshire6845 (T): A/U Despite an oncoming war between the Dark and the Light, Emma and Regina are best friends growing up in the Enchanted Forest. When war does come, they find themselves on opposite sides. Regina will have to defy her mother to save Emma. Will Emma be able to save Regina when Cora curses her daughter to live in the Land without Magic?

What We Make (WIP) by DiazTuna (M): “My mother.” He says calmly. He’d known all along, she’s aware. But he’d known that today would be the day that would get this going. She wants to ask what it was like, to have woken up this morning, laced up his boots and walked into hell just knowing. “It’s programmed the cyborg to kill her. Before I have a chance to be born.” -In which the leader of the future sends his best soldier back to the past to save his mother from a killer cyborg. Terminator AU.

The Wrong Way by pcworth (M): Takes place right after Zelena steals Regina's heart. Zelena offers Regina a chance to go back in time with her and change both of their lives for the better. But what will be the price of that decision. Slow-burn to SwanQueen

zombie trash by 13pens (T): Zelena could have her brain and eat it, too. Fic operates on three premises 1. this takes place in any universe where zelena is a reformed asshole 2. zombies are a thing and exist iZombie style 3. i have NO chill

#swan queen #fic rec #ouat

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nextwarden · 3 years ago

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Webtoons are good for the soul PART II - ECLECTIC BOOGALOO

A continuation of this.

Sea Salt and Sand by neggut [ongoing]

In the autumn holidays 3 months ago, Brynn and Bailey shared a kiss. When Bailey left, Brynn tried to forget all about her and continue living an unremarkable life, only for Bailey to suddenly transfer to her school! What follows is a coming of age story full of pining, misunderstandings and confusion as Brynn and Bailey question the true nature of their relationship.

It’s cute and a bit angsty but not too much. The art style often feels incomplete or rushed but in a good way, its flaws give character to the characters and the story. One of my all time favourites.

Apathy meets labrador/10

Dragonbourne by Gummy Shark [ongoing]

After a troubled past, Sir Ross Edmund Avery is somewhat content to lead a mundane existence, alone in his house. However, when he stumbles upon a child in the woods on Solstice Night who is anything but mundane, his simple life will be turned upside down.

A scar(r)ed man adopts a feral child, hijinks ensue. Once again, the art style is endearing, full of curves and long lines. Haven’t checked on that one in a while but the first twenty chapters were very promising.

Found family/10

The Last Human by Zack Jordan [ongoing]

She's the galaxy's worst nightmare: a Human. Fortunately, she's the last one. Now her adoptive (alien) mother is realizing that raising a young Human is no easy task.

Basically the badass and child duo trope but the truth may surprise you. Fun, cute, very wholesome, and surprisingly emotionnaly philosophical at times. Spidermom is best mom.

Recommend/10

Vampire Husband by Scragony [ongoing]

The life of Charles the Vampire an Cheryl the human after years of marriage.

What if tragic romance between human and vampire but they had their “happy-ever-after”? This is after. It’s funny and cute.

Relationship goals/10

Blood Stain by sigeel [ongoing]

A story about courage, growing up and finding friendships in most unlikely places... spiced with some MAD SCIENCE!

Haven’t quite wrapped my head around this one yet, but it’s fun and drawn by sigeel (a.k.a. Linda Sejic) so of course it’s beautiful. Enjoyed it a lot, will have to keep reading.

Bloody merry/10

Punderworld by sigeel [ongoing - on hiatus]

Hades' and Persephone's love-struck misadventures.

Another take on Hades and Persephone’s love story. Once again, sigeel, so of course I love the art.

Bumbling idiots/10

The Queen and the Woodborn by Shiniez [ongoing]

Far away behind seven hills and seven forests, seven fields and seven rivers, there lived a Queen... welcome to the queen and the woodborn. a fairy tale romance for the mature readers about the unseen Queen and the Goddess in the woods. a tale of the two forgotten by the world around them who will make the world remember their names. expect gods and monsters and a romance for the ages.

Not many chapters yet but very long ones to compensate. This one is by Shiniez (a.k.a. Stjepan Sejic) so, once again, love the art. The story, the character designs and concepts, and the pace are all amazing.

Very wow/10

P.E.T.S. by Gyxks [ongoing]

Just when Tasha was about to start a new life, she was abducted by aliens. Fortunately, she and other humans were rescued by an interstellar general named Tourmaline. She soon discovered that her body was unfit to return home without endangering life on earth. Join her on her journey traversing this new world and these new feelings for an alien general.

POV: You’re living your best life as a young adult, at the shopping mall at 2am in your pyjamas, when suddenly death aliens rain pain all around and you’re abducted only to be saved by tall buff alien commander lady. Romance ensues. Maybe, it’s slow burn but quite enjoyable to read.

Blush/10

Scoob and Shag by Misterie Krew [ongoing]

Scoob and his best pal Shag are up to their usual hi-jinks, but everything is not as it seems in their latest adventure.

No relations to any character whatsoever. None. None at all. Also no relations to any kind of sense at all either. Can’t quite explain that one except that it’s genius. Just read it.

Is that a gun?/10

Bewitched by peachyytown [ongoing]

The witch who keeps "kidnapping" the princess is actually her girlfriend and they're just going on dates.

Short but cute alternative take on all that witch/monster/princess shenanigans. In the same vein as Our days in Lumain. Also the art is very nice.

Meetcute/10

When the Pink Trees Bear Fruit by neggut [completed]

A sweet love blooms between two women on an orchard in 1973.

A short story, five chapters only, but play devastatingly well with one’s heart. In the same vein as It Stems From Love by Soya S. Holm. neggut ist sehr gut.

Tears/10

Rooftops & Roommates by Zaanart [ongoing]

Jeb is an architecture major at university, rooming with his best friend Todd. There's just one problem... Jeb’s secretly a gargoyle! Between studying, partying, and a bad ghost problem, will Jeb be able to keep his true identity a secret?

Jeb is sweet, Jeb is fresh, but Jeb is decidedly not very good at keeping a secret. It’s funny, slice-of-life, roommate college shenanigans at its finest. With a magical twist.

Ship/10

Everything is Fine by Mike Birchall [ongoing]

Sam and Maggie are a normal couple, in a normal house, in a normal neighborhood. There is nothing strange about their heads, their neighbors or their sweet little dog. Everything is Fine.

I haven’t actually started this one yet, but the premise is very very very interesting. Perhaps not for thos who are faint of heart? Deceptively cute. Or is it?

It’s fine/10

Castle Swimmer by Wendy Lian Martin [ongoing]

What happens when your entire life is ruled by a prophecy – your future foretold by people you’ve never met, who died long before you were born. Such is the story of two young sea creatures. One believed to be a guiding light for his people, a Beacon who will lead them to a bright, prosperous future. The other is a teenage prince for who’s destiny is to KILL the Beacon so that HIS own people might thrive. When both reject the course set for them, it leads to a raucous adventure as big and unpredictable as the ocean itself – and a romance that nobody could have predicted.

It’s fish. It’s gay. It’s under da sea and ya gotta kiss the boy. I haven’t read it all yet but enough to vouch for it and to have some vested interest in the universe and its lore.

Enemies to lovers/10

Demon Highschool by Kiiyoko [ongoing]

After a compromise it was agreed that criminals would attend a "demons highschool" where they would work as slaves for demons And while it was all in good favor, things take a very dark and twisted turn at said, highschool.

There’s something, some kind of twist, about the MC which I haven’t gotten to yet, and which I am very interested to discover. I’m not quite sure how I feel about this one as of now, mostly curious I’d say.

Pet/10

Hooky by Miriam Bonastre Tur [completed]

Dani and Dorian have missed the bus of the school of magic. Now, they must find someone who teach them how to be a great and good witches... Or maybe not.

This one is a strange one about witchery and family. Surprisingly deep and serious at times, very enjoyable. Unfinished on Webtoon but a good start to get into the story.

Siblings/10

Loving Reaper by Jenny Jinya [ongoing]

Animals struggle. Pets and Wildlife alike. The reaper cares for their stories and helps them with the crossover. Short stories about the "Loving Reaper" to raise awareness and collect funds. Breaking hearts for a good cause.

Beautiful bittersweet stories about animals, pets, life and death and love.

Tissues/10

Batman: Wayne Family Adventures by StarBite, CRC Payne, Kielamel Siba, Lan Ma, C.M. Cameron, and Camille Cruz [ongoing]

Batman needs a break. But with new vigilante Duke Thomas moving into Wayne Manor and an endless supply of adopted, fostered, and biological superhero children to manage, Bruce Wayne is going to have his hands full. Being a father can't be harder than being Batman, right?

What if Bat-family but happy? Official comic, barely started, very fun.

Wholesome/10

The First Night With the Duke by MSG, Taeva, from an original work by Hwang DoTol [ongoing]

A handsome, selfish noble falls for a beautiful, kind commoner -- at least, that’s how the story’s supposed to go. When an average college student wakes up as Ripley, an extra in her favorite romance novel, she resolves to enjoy the luxuries of her character’s status while watching the novel's plot unfold from the sidelines. However, her plans are soon derailed when she finds herself in bed with no other than Duke Zeronis, the novel’s hero! Dodging the villainess’ schemes, the Duke’s advances, and her own feelings, can Ripley keep the story on track and survive beyond the first night?

Haven’t read that one but a very dear (and respectable) friend (*cough* @berigolote *cough*) of mine keeps pestering me to give it a try. So here it is, try it.

Do it before me and you get a cookie/10

HEART Anthology by Marvin.W, caw-chan and many other artists. [ongoing]

Featuring stories from the 2020 Short Story Contest! From wholesome stories to tearjerkers, are you ready to catch these feelings?

A collection of beautiful stories on the shorter side, all about the many kinds of love in life, the many beauties of it, and the pains that make it worth living.

Tears that warm the heart/10

In My Heart by Redfield42 [ongong]

Sasaki Mari is a typical delinquent troublemaker whose only goal is to get a boyfriend, but due to her reputation as bully and low grades, all the boys reject her. Then she decides to change her style, and asks for help from the student with the best grades in the class.

It starts off light and fund and progressively seems to delve a little bit more into the seriousness of life. Not a tragedy, however, and very much worth a read still.

I think I have a trope I like/10

My awkward princess by LazyArts [ongoing]

This love story is about a girl named Luna charlotte, and the student council president Alice Evelyn. Luna is a delinquent whom often gets in trouble, as Luna reaches the end of the line she almost gets expelled, now luna has to become a model student with the help of Alice. Will Luna be expelled or will she succeed, read to find out.

Along the lines of Not So Shoujo Love Story, In My Heart, and Susuhara is a Demon. Delinquent/Good Student meetcute, romantinc hijincks ensue.

Seduction/10

RAINBOW! by Rue & Sunny Gloom [ongoing]

This is the story of a girl named Boo. She has pink hair and a vivid imagination and she is about to discover a side of herself that she never considered before.

Okay, so yes, this one is also also a delinquent meets cute nice girl, but - BUT! - there’s an element of story telling that I love about it: the way we see Boo’s anxiety incorporated visually into the story. Just for that it is one of my favourite recent discoveries!

Protecc/10

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Okay, that’s all for part II. Hope you enjoy those as much as I do. Thanks for your attention, sorry for the length and, please, do keep on reading, they all deserve it! As do you.

PART I

#webtoon #webcomic #comic #comics #recommendations #part 2 #the return of the revenge #wlw #mlm #long post #mega thread #keep reading punk

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starwarsnonsense · 5 years ago

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Top 10 Most Anticipated Films of 2020

Now I’ve got my embarrassingly late ‘Best of 2019′ list out of the way, I can finally proceed to the list that’s probably more exciting - my most anticipated films of 2020!

This list excludes films that have already been screened at festivals (otherwise, stuff like Saint Maud would be here). It’s also somewhat analogous to groping about for a light switch in the dark - these lists very rarely accurately predict my ultimate favourites for the year, so it’s more of a fun speculative exercise. Hopefully this puts some intriguing-looking films on your radar for the year ahead!

1. Dune (dir. Denis Villeneuve)

Plot: The story of Paul Atreides (Timothée Chalamet), a brilliant and gifted young man born into a great destiny beyond his understanding, who must travel to the most dangerous planet in the universe to ensure the future of his family and his people.

Why be excited? The reasons to be excited about Dune should be pretty self-evident - it’s directed by one of the greatest filmmakers working today (Villeneuve’s Incendies and Blade Runner 2049 are all-timers for me), and is based on one of the best science-fiction novels ever written. The cast - Timothée Chalamet, Rebecca Ferguson, Oscar Isaac, Javier Bardem, Charlotte Rampling, and more - is absolutely stacked with talent. There’s every reason to believe that this will be something special, and I couldn’t be more pleased that Villeneuve is the man responsible for filling that Star Wars-shaped hole in the December release schedule.

2. Annette (dir. Leos Carax)

Plot: A stand-up comedian (Adam Driver), and his opera singer wife (Marion Cotillard), have a two-year-old daughter with a surprising gift.

Why be excited? You may not have heard of him, but Leos Carax is one of the most exciting directors working - he only makes around one film a decade, but the films he does make tend to be very special. I’ve only seen one film of his - Lovers on the Bridge - but that was filled with such ecstatic romance and wondrous visuals that it made me tremendously excited for Annette. Annette is a top-to-bottom musical with songs by American duo Sparks (if you know them for anything, it will be ‘This Town Ain’t Big Enough for the Both of Us’), and said songs will be delivered by Adam Driver and Marion Cotillard. It goes without saying that both actors are extremely talented performers with great voices (see Driver in Marriage Story and Cotillard in Nine for evidence), and I’m looking forward to seeing how they demonstrate their talents here.

3. Last Night in Solo (dir. Edgar Wright)

Plot: A young girl (Thomasin McKenzie), passionate in fashion design, is mysteriously able to enter the 1960s where she encounters her idol, a dazzling wannabe singer (Anya Taylor-Joy). But 1960s London is not what it seems, and time seems to fall apart with shady consequences.

Why be excited? I’m not the biggest Edgar Wright fan, but I admire him greatly and the premise of Last Night in Soho is like cat-nip to me. Speaking to Empire, Wright explained the story as follows: “I’m taking a premise whereby you have a character who, in a sort of abstract way, gets to travel in time. And the reality of the decade is maybe not what she imagines. It has an element of ‘be careful what you wish for’.” I’m a sucker for a good, old-fashioned high concept, especially when said films play with genre and really challenge the viewer. The two female leads - Thomasin McKenzie (JoJo Rabbit, Leave No Trace) and Anya Taylor-Joy (The Witch, Emma) - are among the very best young actors working today, and the supporting cast features absolute legends such as Diana Rigg and Terence Stamp. Whether it’s successful or not, this film feels like a genuinely original prospect and I’m eager to see how it turns out.

4. The Green Knight (dir. David Lowery)

Plot: A fantasy re-telling of the medieval tale of Sir Gawain and the Green Knight.

Why be excited? There has been a sad lack of films based on mythology in recent years - or, to be more accurate, there has been a sad lack of films that attempt to honour what the myths were actually trying to convey. The stunning trailer for Green Knight promises a film that genuinely engages with its source material, and is just as interested in the psychological truths of the tale as the spectacle of its fantastical scenarios. Dev Patel is an extremely talented actor coming off another great movie in The Personal History of David Copperfield, and the supporting cast (Alicia Vikander!) appear to be fully committed to their parts. I’m excited to see a true myth on the big screen again, and David Lowery (A Ghost Story, The Old Man & The Gun) can be trusted to give an old tale a new sense of vitality.

5. The French Dispatch (dir. Wes Anderson)

Plot: The staff of a European publication decides to publish a memorial edition highlighting the three best stories from the last decade: an artist sentenced to life imprisonment, student riots, and a kidnapping resolved by a chef.

Why be excited? It’s a Wes Anderson movie! Of course I’m excited! In all seriousness, the trailer was all I needed to get hyped about this. It’s clearly Anderson’s quintessential style, but it also shows flashes of some very bold and striking compositions (yes, I’m thinking of Chalamet on the back of that motorcycle) that you wouldn’t necessarily think of in relation to him. I’m intrigued by the prospect of there being stories nested within a story, which feels like the perfect choice for the structure of a film about a newspaper. The cast features all of Anderson’s old favourites (Swinton! Murray! McDormand!), as well as some exciting new additions (Timothée Chalamet, Elisabeth Moss, Christoph Waltz, among others) that feel so well-suited to his style it’s surprising they haven’t worked together before. Bring on all those immaculately composed shots and exquisite colour palettes.

6. Tenet (dir. Christopher Nolan)

Plot: Unknown. The project is described as an action epic revolving around international espionage.

Why be excited? I hate to sound repetitive, but ... it’s a Christopher Nolan movie. That alone is enough to be hyped about this. Details of the plot are vague for now, but the teaser suggests the sort of intelligent, high-concept film-making we’ve come to expect from Nolan. John David Washington - who impressed in BlacKkKlansman - is a great choice for the lead, and I also love that Tenet will feature Robert Pattinson and Elizabeth Debicki (among my favourite actors) in prominent roles. There’s not much else to say given how little we know about this, but suffice to say I’ll be there on day one!

7. Wonder Woman 1984 (dir. Patty Jenkins)

Plot: Wonder Woman (Gal Gadot) comes into conflict with the Soviet Union during the Cold War in the 1980s and finds a formidable foe by the name of the Cheetah (Kristen Wiig).

Why be excited? The original Wonder Woman was an absolute delight, and I couldn’t be more pleased that Patty Jenkins is back to continue Diana’s story. The decision to pick up with Diana in the 1980s is most intriguing (and paves the way for all kinds of exciting choices when it comes to the music and the fashions), especially since it looks like the film is actually going to explore the implications of being an immortal being in a mortal world.

8. Raya and the Last Dragon (dir. Paul Briggs and Dean Wellins)

Plot: A lone warrior from the fantasy kingdom of Kumandra teams up with a crew of misfits in her quest to find the Last Dragon and bring light and unity back to their world.

Why be excited? The animation scene in 2020 looks kind of ... blah at the moment, with the notable exception of Raya and the Last Dragon. The setting was described by the film’s producer as "a reimagined Earth inhabited by an ancient civilization that venerated the mythical dragons for their power and their wisdom”, and that alone is enough to fire up my imagination. Off the back of Moana and the Frozen films (which I all unabashedly love), I trust Disney Animation to instil this with plenty of colour and verve.

9. I’m Thinking of Ending Things (dir. Charlie Kaufman)

Plot: An unexpected detour turns a couple’s road trip into a terrifying journey through their fragile psyches.

Why be excited? Directed by Charlie Kaufman (writer of Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind), I’m Thinking of Ending Things is based on a prize-winning novel. However, despite the pedigree the main reason I’m looking forward to this is Jessie Buckley. Buckley gave a star-making performance in Beast a few years ago, and has since proven herself an actor of immense talent and skill (see Wild Rose for proof of what a powerhouse she is). I’m excited to see her career continue to go from strength to strength, and I’m Thinking of Ending Things seems poised to be a great showcase for her.

10. The Last Duel (dir. Ridley Scott)

Plot: King Charles VI declares that Knight Jean de Carrouges (Matt Damon) settle his dispute with his squire (Adam Driver) by challenging him to a duel.

Why be excited? Ridley Scott is a bit of a mixed bag for me, and has never come close to reaching the heights of Alien and Blade Runner with his recent work. Nonetheless, against my better judgement I can’t help but be excited by the prospect of a medieval epic with Scott at the helm. The acting talent attached to The Last Duel is top-notch, and I’m particularly fond of Jodie Comer (of Killing Eve fame) and Adam Driver (do you really need me to say more?). There’s a very real danger of the highly sensitive plot (the ‘dispute’ at the heart of the story concerns an accusation of rape, the truth of which is to be determined with a duel) being mishandled by Scott, but the involvement of screenwriter Nicole Holofcener gives me some hope. This could turn out to be a misfire, but my hope is that it will, at the very least, be interesting.

#dune #annette #last night in soho #green knight #the french dispatch #timothee chalamet #Adam driver #jessie buckley #the last duel #i'm thinking of ending things #raya and the last dragon #wonder woman 1984 #tenet #films #2020 in film #cinema

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dillydedalus · 4 years ago

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january reading

why does january always feel like it’s 3 months long. anyway here’s what i read in january, feat. poison experts with ocd, ants in your brain, old bolsheviks getting purged, and mountweazels.

city of lies, sam hawke (poison wars #1) this is a perfectly nice fantasy novel about jovan, who serves as essentially a secret guard against poisoning for his city state’s heir and is forced to step up when his uncle (also a secret poison guard) and the ruler are both killed by an unknown poison AND also the city is suddenly under a very creepy siege (are these events related? who knows!) this is all very fine & entertaining & there are some fun ideas, but also... the main character has ocd and SAME HAT SAME HAT. also like the idea of having a very important, secret and potentially fatal job that requires you to painstakingly test everything the ruler/heir is consuming WHILE HAVING OCD is like... such a deliciously sadistic concept. amazing. 3/5

my heart hemmed in, marie ndiaye (translated from french by jordan stump) a strange horror-ish tale in which two married teachers, bastions of upper-middle-class respectability and taste, suddenly find themselves utterly despised by everyone around them, escalating until the husband is seriously injured. through several very unexpected twists, it becomes clear that the couple’s own contempt for anyone not fitting into their world and especially nadia’s hostility and shame about her (implied to be northern african) ancestry is the reason for their pariah status. disturbing, surprising, FUCKED UP IF TRUE (looking back, i no longer really know what i mean by that). 4/5

xenogenesis trilogy (dawn/adulthood rites/imago), octavia e. butler octavia butler is incapable of writing anything uninteresting and while i don’t always completely vibe with her stuff, it’s always fascinating & thought-provoking. this series combines some of her favourite topics (genetic manipulation, alien/human reproduction, what is humanity) into a tale of an alien species, the oankali, saving some human survivors from the apocalypse and beginning a gene-trading project with them, integrating them into their reproductive system and creating mixed/’construct’ generations with traits from both species. and like, to me, this was uncomfortably into the biology = destiny thing & didn’t really question the oankali assertion that humans were genetically doomed to hierarchical behaviour & aggression (& also weirdly straight for a book about an alien species with 3 genders that engages in 5-partner-reproduction with humans), so that angle fell flat for me for the most part, altho i suppose i do agree that embracing change, even change that comes at a cost, is better than clinging to an unsustainable (& potentially destructive) purity. where i think the series is most interesting is in its exploration of consent and in how far consent is possible in extremely one-sided power dynamics (curiously, while the oankali condemn and seem to lack the human drive for hierarchy, they find it very easy to abuse their position of power & violate boundaries & never question the morality of this. in this, the first book, focusing on a human survivor first encountering the oankali and learning of their project, is the most interesting, as lilith as a human most explicitly struggles with her position - would her consent be meaningful? can she even consent when there is a kind of biochemical dependence between humans and their alien mates? the other two books, told from the perspectives of lilith’s constructed/mixed children, continue discussing themes of consent, autonomy and power dynamics, but i found them less interesting the further they moved from human perspectives. on the whole: 2.5/5

love & other thought experiments, sophie ward man, we love a pierre menard reference. anyway. this is a novel in stories, each based (loosely) on a thought experiment, about (loosely) a lesbian couple and their son arthur, illness and grief, parenthood, love, consciousness and perception, alternative universes, and having an ant in your brain. it is thoroughly delightful & clever, but goes for warmth and humanity (or ant-ity) over intellectual games (surprising given that it is all about thought experiments - but while they are a nice structuring device i don’t think they add all that much). i haven’t entirely worked out my feelings about the ending and it’s hard to discuss anyway given the twists and turns this takes, but it's a whole lot of fun. 4/5

a general theory of oblivion, josé eduardo agualusa (tr. from portuguese by daniel hahn) interesting little novel(la) set in angola during and after the struggle for independence, in which a portuguese woman, ludo, with extreme agoraphobia walls herself into her apartment to avoid the violence and chaos (but also just... bc she has agoraphobia) with a involving a bunch of much more active characters and how they are connected to her to various degrees. i didn’t like the sideplot quite as much as ludo’s isolation in her walled-in flat with her dog, catching pigeons on the balcony and writing on the walls. 3/5

cassandra at the wedding, dorothy baker phd student cassandra returns home attend (sabotage) her twin sister judith’s wedding to a young doctor whose name she refuses to remember, believing that her sister secretly wants out. cass is a mess, and as a shift to judith’s perspective reveals, definitely wrong about what judith wants and maybe a little delusional, but also a ridiculously compelling narrator, the brilliant but troubled contrast to judith’s safer conventionality. on the whole, cassandra’s narrative voice is the strongest feature of a book i otherwise found a bit slow & a bit heavy on the quirky family. fav line is when cass, post-character-development, plans to “take a quick look at [her] dumb thesis and see if it might lead to something less smooth and more revolting, or at least satisfying more than the requirements of the University”. 3/5

the office of historical corrections, danielle evans a very solid collection of realist short stories (+ the titular novella), mainly dealing with racism, (black) womanhood, relationships between women, and anticolonial/antiracist historiography. while i thought all the stories were well-done and none stood out as weak or an unnecessary inclusion, there also weren’t any that really stood out to me. 3/5

sonnenfinsternis, arthur koestler (english title: darkness at noon) (audio) you know what’s cool about this book? when i added it to my goodreads tbr in 2012, i would have had to read it in translation as the german original was lost during koestler’s escape from the nazis, but since then, the original has been rediscovered and republished. yet another proof that leaving books on your tbr for ages is a good thing actually. anyway. this is a story about the stalinist purges, told thru old bolshevik rubashov, who, after serving the Party loyally for years & doing his fair share of selling people out for the Party, is arrested for ~oppositional activities. in jail and during his interrogations, rubashov reflects on the course the Party has taken and his own part (and guilt) in that, and the way totalitarianism has eaten up and poisoned even the most commendable ideals the Party once held (and still holds?), the course of history and at what point the end no longer justifies the means. it’s brilliant, rubashov is brilliant and despicable, i’m very happy it was rediscovered. 5/5

heads of the colored people, nafissa thompson-spires another really solid short story collection, also focused on the experiences of black people in america (particularly the black upper-middle class), black womanhood and black relationships, altho with a somewhat more satirical tone than danielle evans’s collection. standouts for me were the story in letters between the mothers of the only black girls at a private school, a story about a family of fruitarians, and a story about a girl who fetishises her disabled boyfriend(s). 3.5/5

pedro páramo, juan rulfo (gernan transl. by dagmar ploetz) mexican classic about a rich and abusive landowner (the titular pedro paramo) and the ghost town he leaves behind - quite literally, as, when his son tries to find his father, the town is full of people, quite ready to talk shit about pedro, but they are all dead. it’s an interesting setting with occasionally vivid writing, but the skips in time and character were kind of confusing and i lost my place a lot. i’d be interested in reading rulfo’s other major work, el llano en llamas. 2.5/5

verse für zeitgenossen, mascha kaléko short collection of the poems kaléko, a jewish german poet, wrote while in exile in the united states in the 30-40s, as well as some poems written after the end of ww2. kaléko’s voice is witty, but at turns also melancholy or satirical. as expected i preferred the pieces that directly addressed the experience of exile (”sozusagen ein mailied” is one of my favourite exillyrik pieces). 3/5

the harpy, megan hunter yeah this was boooooooring. the cover is really cool & the premise sounded intriguing (women gets cheated on, makes deal with husband that she is allowed to hurt him three times in revenge, women is also obsessed with harpies: female revenge & female monsters is my jam) but it’s literally so dull & trying so hard to be deep. 1.5/5

the liar’s dictionary, eley williams this is such a delightful book, from the design (those marbled endpapers? yes) to the preface (all about what a dictionary is/could be), to the chapter headings (A-Z words, mostly relating to lies, dishonesty, etc in some way or another, containing at least one fictitious entry), to the dual plots (intern at new edition of a dictionary in contemporary england checking the incomplete old dictionary for mountweazels vs 1899 london with the guy putting the mountweazels in), to williams’s clear joy about words and playing with them. there were so many lines that made me think about how to translate them, which is always a fun exercise. 3.5/5

catherine the great & the small, olja knežević (tr. from montenegrin by ellen elias-bursać, paula gordon) coming-of-age-ish novel about katarina from montenegro, who grows up in titograd/podgorica and belgrad in the 70s/80s, eventually moving to london as an adult. to be honest while there are some interesting aspects in how this portrays yugoslavia and conflicts between the different parts of yugoslavia, i mostly found this a pretty sloggy slog of misery without much to emotionally connect to, which is sad bc i was p excited for it :(. 2/5

the decameron project: 29 new stories from the pandemic, anthology a collection of short stories written during covid lockdown (and mostly about covid/lockdown in some way). they got a bunch of cool authors, including margaret atwood, edwidge danticat, rachel kushner ... it’s an interesting project and the stories are mostly pretty good, but there wasn’t one that really stood out to me as amazing. i also kinda wish more of the stories had diverged more from covid/lockdown thematically bc it got a lil repetitive tbh. 2/5

#the books i read #long post #sonnenfinsternis is so good the audiobook nearly made me cry in the supermarket

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lambychop · 5 years ago

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Ultimate Horror Flick List

I know this isn’t usually my style, but 🎵it’s the most wonderful time of the year🎵

That’s right: it’s the spoopy month! Which means SPOOPY MOVIES

So I present to you:

IRONICENIGMA’S ULTIMATE HORROR FLICK LIST FOR ALL TYPES OF FILM LOVERS

1) For the Gore Hounds

•Saw series- the classic films for the guys who just wanna see some people get ripped to shreads (honestly, after the second one, they go downhill)

•Jigsaw- the more recent edition to the Saw series (this ones actually pretty good and FULL of gore)

•Hostel- Saw Studies Abroad (TM)

•Final Destination series- kinda a dumb one. The movies can be kinda dumb, but the kills are INSANE. Fun movies to watch with the gang

•Texas Chainsaw Massacre- you know it, you love it, I don’t gotta explain it

•Cannibal Holocaust- seriously messed up. Banned in multiple countries. It’s something special.

•The Midnight Meat Train- lesser known, kinda weird, super bloody

•Cabin Fever- gross disease makes you loose your skin. Nasty

•Wrong Turn- basically The Hills Have Eyes but with funner kills

2) The Classic Slashers

•Scream series- one of my faves. Classic story of small town teens with a killer on the loose. Lots of fun

•Friday the Thirteenth- do I have to tell you why this is here?

•Nightmare on Elm Street- Johnny Depp getting turned into a volcano of blood? I’m in.

•Halloween- can’t have Halloween without the movie that took the name, right?

•My Bloody Valentine (the original one)- one of my all time favorite movies. Creepy killer, great group of characters, great time

•Sleepaway Camp- infamous for its batshit ending. Kinda weird ngl, but a classic

•The Town That Dreaded Sundown- Based on a real killer. Oldie, but goodie

•Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon- different take on the slasher genre. Fun look into the life of a movie slasher

•You’re Next- badass female lead? Check. Masked murderers? Check. Family bonding? Uh sure okay

•I Know What You Did Last Summer- secrets are bad. Roll credits

3) Supernatural (demons, ghosts, etc)

•The Conjuring- it’s pretty popular, you know it

•Insidious- also popular. Moral: your body is a ghost hotel

•Sinister- classic demon: likes kids, likes brutal deaths, likes to appear in the background of pictures

•The Exorcist- obviously

•Lights Out- ghosts are scared of light, that’s all you need to know

•The Sixth Sense- not really scary. Actually pretty wholesome. In an “I see dead people” kinda way

•The Rite- priest Anthony Hopkins coughs up nails

•The Omen- aka don’t trust kids

•1408- haunted hotel room. Someone call the ghoul bois

•The Amityville Horror- based on true events. Well at least we know the murders were real and the house is creepy

•The Skeleton Key- Old People+Voodoo= bad time

•Haunting In Connecticut- also a “true” story. Don’t buy a house that used to be a morgue

•The Autopsy Of Jane Doe- boy bonds with dad over dead teenage girl

•Mama- moths are gross, ghosts are worse. Dead Mom from Beetlejuice, but now a movie

•Rosemary’s Baby- dont trust thy neighbor

•The Shinning- classic. That’s all I’ve got to say

•The Orphanage- again: creepy kids

•Stir Of Echos- Kevin Bacon sees ghosts. Must I say more?

•The Others- haunted house story with a twist ending

4) Creature Features

•Trick ‘r Treat- classic Halloween film. Fun, creepy, iconic

•The Ritual- camping trip turns bad. Monster looks really cool

•A Quiet Place- you’ve probably seen it. Jim from the office speaks sign language

•The Babadook- children’s storybook is not kid friendly

•Backcountry- bears are dangerous

•Alien- you’ve seen this already but it needs to be here

•The Descent- dont watch if your claustrophobic

•An American Werewolf In London- also a fave. Best werewolf movie ever made

•The Monster- lesser know, actually pretty good

•The Thing- classic. Super good. Based on a short story. No one can be trusted because you don’t know if they’re even them

5) Horror Comedies

•Zombieland- hysterical. Bloody. Great cast

•Cabin In The Woods- this movie is insane. Combine every horror monster ever, the Illuminati, and the Office- that’s this movie

•Shaun of the Dead- the classic horror comedy

•Scary Movie series- less horror, ridiculous comedy

•This Is The End- again, like no horror, but one of the funniest films ever

6)Found Footage (not a great genre, but some can be pretty entertaining)

•The Blair Witch Project- basically the king of the found footage films. You’ve seen it

•The Conspiracy- the Illuminati is real and they don’t like to be filmed

•Paranormal Activity series- kinda annoying to horror fans. Relies on jump scares and the characters are idiots. But if I’m doing a section on foud footage, this has to be here

•Creep- okay this movie actually really disturbed me. People are absolutely insane. Don’t meet up with people from Craigslist

•V/H/S series- basically a anthology of short horror films. Kinda fun

•Apollo 18- the government faked the moon landing because they found some crazy shit

•The Sacrament- Jonestown caught on camera

•As Above So Below- Paris Catacombs are wack

•Grave Encounters- what if Ghost Adventures actually found ghosts

•Unfriended Dark Web- lets be honest: the first one sucked. Second one is actually not bad. Take away the ghosts, add the black market

•The Poughkeepsie Tapes- lesser know, can be hard to find. Really disturbing. Basically watching a serial killer tape his crimes

•Cold Ground- Set up to look just like it’s out of the seventies. It’s pretty fun

•The Last Exorcism- priests are liers

•Quarantine- English version of [REC]. I wouldn’t say it’s great, but it’s something

•Hell House LLC.- kids set up a haunted house. People die

•The Houses October Built- again with the haunted houses. Don’t trust em

•The Bay- Cabin Fever but found footage-y

•Willow Creek- y’all gotta leave Bigfoot alone

•Lake Mungo- girl drowns, family sees her ghost. No jump scares with this one, like most found footage. Mostly just a family in mourning

•The Tunnel- if the government says to stay out, STAY OUT

•The Taking Of Deborah Logan- alzheimers itself is awful to go through, but let’s add some more spooks

•The Possession Of Michael King- another possession film? Yep they just keep comin

•The Last Broadcast- suspicious murder of tv hosts

6) Family Fun

•Hocus Pocus- okay obviously

•Beetlejuice- dark humor in a “kids” film. Most of the comedy caters to adults, but it’s an awesome film

•Corpse Bride- guy accidentally marries dead girl. Wholesome family fun

•The Nightmare Before Christmas- my fave Disney film. Super cute

•Frankenweenie- dead dog=goodest boy

•Paranorman- sixth sense but now for kids+zombies

•Coraline- Might scar some small children, but I loved it when it came out when I was 8

7) Psychological

•Midsommar- happy cult family holds a festival

•Funny Games- home invasion movie done well. No cheap thrills, just some sadistic shit

•The Strangers- dont answer the door for people wearing masks when it’s not Halloween are you crazy

•The Perfection- artistic, bloody, absolute mind fuck

•Gerald’s Game- sexy time turns not good

•Unsane- imagine being stalked and no one believes you. That’s the premise

•Triangle- ummmmmmmm wtf is happening what time is it??

•It Comes At Night- trust is bad. Paranoia is good.

•The Silence of the Lambs- my personal favorite film. Serial killer helps rookie detective find another serial killer

•Jacob’s Ladder- Vietnam vet struggles with EXTREMELY terrifying visions

AND THERE YOU GO. I have seen plenty more, so if you don’t see one you’d like on this list, hit me up with what kinda movie you’re lookin for and I’ll hook you up amigo

#halloween #horror #movies #movie recommendation #horror movies

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guardianreadersofthegalaxy · 5 years ago

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Dom’s mini Who reviews - the decent episodes

Aliens Of London/ World War Three – One of Davies’s ‘people watching the news’ episodes. The Slitheen design is good but the CGI and prosthetics have aged poorly. The Iraq allegory is solid and Jackie and Mickey get plenty to do. And Penelope Wilton is awesome.

Army Of Ghosts/ Doomsday – Yet more news watching. Torchwood are a bit boring but part 1 does a good job building mystique around the breach & sphere. The Dalek reveal blew my 13 year old mind. The scenes at the wall and Bad Wolf Bay pack a hell of a punch, thanks to Tennant, Piper & Gold.

Boom Town – Capturing the villain at the end of act 1 and having to decide what to do with them is fantastic premise. The restaurant scene is the highlight and I think it works that you never find out what the Doctor would have done. The setting is pretty dull though, as are the first fifteen minutes.

Fugitive Of The Judoon – This is just bananas. The Ruth & Cpt. Jack plots never converge for some reason. It’s not good but it is refreshingly mad. The Judoon look great and 13 gets plenty of comic moments as well as more serious stuff. Ruth Doctor is fine in the short time you see her.

The Girl Who Waited – Another solid premise. Even though you know young Amy will be alright, the drama works. Both Karen Gillan and Arthur Darvill shine and the robots are fairly intimidating. My only gripe is that old Amy still has incredible hair for some reason.

The Husbands Of River Song – I love 12 doing comedy. Capaldi and Kingston have great chemistry and the final scene is really sweet. Matt Lucas’s best days are still ahead of him but Greg Davies is hilarious. The joke of River stupidly not recognising the Doctor is played out way too long though.

The Impossible Astronaut/ Day Of The Moon – IA feels like a really game changing series opener but knowing how it all turns out sours it on the rewatch. DotM is fun but crams way too much set up and it’s screwed up how they save the day. Still there are plenty of memorable moments and the setting is cool.

Into The Dalek – ANOTHER solid premise! This looks great and is actually exciting. It’s weird how they conflate hating the Daleks with goodness. They clean it up at the end but by then it’s too late. And the Dalek going rogue when they fix it is predictable. But I’m a sucker for good action and visuals.

Night Terrors – This is up there with Midnight & The Empty Child for DW’s scariest story. Those dolls are so creepy! I can take or leave everything else tbh. I only watch this on Halloween.

Partners In Crime – Great comedy. The running joke of the Doctor and Donna missing each other segues into the excellent dumbshow sequence. The Adipose CGI is rubbish but just look at those little guys! Loses points for the dull setting but earns them for giving Bernard Cribbons screentime.

Planet Of The Ood – Now here’s a cool setting! They don’t tend to do many ice planets. The scene of 10 running from the crane is unnecessary but who cares? Donna is so lovely when she sympathises with the Ood. Not all the music works for me though, bit too weird? Maybe.

The Rebel Flesh/ The Almost People – This is kinda underrated. By the end I’m a bit sick of the castle and brown jumpsuits. And I find it hard to believe that the humans would want to kill their own clones. That said, the action and mystery is solid and two 11th Doctors is fun.

Robot Of Sherwood – This is so much fun! Tom Riley shines as the swashbuckling Robin and has great comedic chemistry with Capaldi’s Doctor. 12’s grumpiness serves more of purpose here than in most of Series 8. Comparing the Doctor to a legendary folk hero is a bit wanky though.

The Snowmen – The first 20 minutes are really good. The scene when Clara follows the Doctor up the ladder is magical. The Doctor giving up on a heroics is abandoned way too soon. When he puts on his bow tie again it should have felt like Spiderman 2, not The Amazing Spiderman 2.

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frasier-crane-style · 5 years ago

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Let’s talk about Treks baby

The One Where Riker Stars In The Grey.

When Riker is reassigned to go over a terraforming colony bedeviled by pesky, genetically engineered wolves, a new first officer is assigned to the Enterprise. And he’s kwazy.

The irritatingly named Quintin Stone is sort of the Nick Locarno to Peter David’s later Mackenzie Calhoun. Brooding rogue, troubled past, gets the job done, you know how it goes. It’s a pretty unabashed power fantasy/Mary Sue in New Frontier, but there the whole thing is so over the top and tongue in cheek that you really can’t take it too seriously. Quintin, on the other hand, is more played for drama--for most of the story, there’s a question as to whether he’s outright homicidally insane. Luckily, Troi is on top of things, checking on his mental well-being and also kinda being his love interest, like a literal version of this gif.

Spoiler alert: It turns out he’s deeply traumatized by a not wholly believable incident in his past*, so good on ya for catching that one, Troi.

Looking back on it, this book would almost seem to count as a deconstruction of the ‘broody antihero’ trope, showing that the character type just doesn’t work in TNG. He infuriates most of the cast and doesn’t get the girl, while those who are taken in by him are presented as saps (yup, Wesley).

Speaking of New Frontier, with the self-aware jokeyness and tongue-in-cheek acknowledgment of Trek’s campier elements, would it be fair to say PAD was ahead of the curve in predicting the modern incarnation of Trek? Its take on Star Trek would definitely fit in with the Kelvinverse movies and especially with The Orville, which is pretty much the people’s choice for Trek these days.

*Okay, I get the interpretation of the Prime Directive as not interfering or revealing yourself to alien cultures until they develop warp drive, at which point they’re going to figure out you’re there anyway. And if you can stop an asteroid from wiping them out without them knowing about it, fine. Cool. I get that. But I don’t get Star Trek stories where the PD means you can’t interfere with the Romulans’ development, even though they’re showing up on your doorstep every other week and shooting at you. It’s like saying if Hitler 2.0 showed up in Germany and started amassing power, the US shouldn’t try to discourage that shit or, I guess, engage in any diplomacy whatsoever. It’s mindbogglingly isolationist. And isn’t it arguable that part of a culture’s natural development is interacting with other cultures? Like the back and forth between America and Japan driving forward the medium of animation?

The One Where Picard Nearly Bangs Guinan’s Sister

This one has a bit of nontroversy attached to it, because it came out while Star Trek was still kind of hashing out the Borg, so there’s a disclaimer at the beginning basically going

The gist of it is that Borg aren’t supposed to have gender (a bunch of people with blue hair just had their ears perk up, didn’t they?), but PAD here has a drone that gets detached from the Collective and is a girl. It seems pretty self-evident to me--Picard gets assimilated, they get him back, he’s still a dude, so why wouldn’t it work that way with a chick? But this is back when assimilation wasn’t the Borg’s m.o. the way it would later become. They assimilate a Ferengi in this book (yup) and it’s kind of a big deal. Oh, and as you might’ve guessed, Girl Borg bears a few similarities to Seven of Nine, who would show up later in the franchise, although PAD’s take on it is more “we rescued a girl from a serial killer’s basement after ten years and she’s totally catatonic,” less “what is this human emotion you call ‘kissing’?”

Good thing we have Deanna Troi, a counselor, to ease Girl Borg through the healing process. Oh, wait, she basically takes one look at GB and goes

Thanks for the help, Troi. I guess this subplot is supposed to prove that it’s pointless to try to save any assimilated person other than Picard, because mentally they’re already dead, so might as well just have a bunch of fun guiltlessly blowing them away

(And that goes for you too, audience.) But still, bit of a downer. At least Spock would’ve tried a mind-meld.

There’s also this chick Delcara, who in a pretty XXtra Flamin' Hot narrative choice is like Picard’s soulmate and he’s sort of in love with her slash obsessed with her after having a psychic vision of her in Starfleet Academy and y’know? TNG might’ve opened the door to this by having Crusher bang a ghost, but we should close that door. We should close it right now.

(By the way, in case you’re wondering if this Guinan’s sister business means Picard is down with the swirl, it turns out she’s Guinan’s adopted sister, so is it just me or is that weirdly ambiguous? She’s a beautiful black woman and Picard wants to do her. You can come out and say it, book. No one minds.)

Anyway, Delcara is piloting one of dem planet-killers from back in TOS--in hindsight, it’s weird that the Abrams movies never did anything with the one big Death Star-y thing that actually is canon to TOS, isn’t it? They gave Khan and Nero ridiculously super-sized ships, but the one kaiju that’s actually in continuity, nothing--on a vendetta against the Borg, who basically killed her family twice over. Man, if only there were some kind of psychologist on board the Enterprise to help her through that trauma.

I sense she feels great bitterness, Captain.

Yeah, why does she get a seat next to the Captain again? Let Worf have that seat. How is it fair that he has to stand around all day, he actually does stuff!

Anyhoo, as you might’ve guessed from the opening set on a holographic rendition of Don Quixote, with a Data Discussion(tm) of quixotic endeavors... and the fact that Delcara intends to totally wipe out the Borg, gosh, I wonder if she’ll succeed--this one’s something of a downer. It does give the promised Planet Killer on Borg Cube action for those fanboys who’ve wondered who would win in a wrassling match, and Picard learns a valuable lesson about not pursuing suicidal vendettas against the Borg, which he definitely takes to heart...

(Wow, he did that one-handed? What kind of gains does Sir Patrick have?)

But still... bit depressing.

The One Where Bones Becomes A Space Pirate

Another giant novel, I’m surprised this one never got raided for parts in any adaptation. Even on the page, it’s pretty breathtakingly cinematic, and yet, the only part of it that’s really been used is, if you squint, Bob Burnham in Discovery being a disgraced Starfleeter.

The premise is that, some months ago, the TOS Enterprise crew was involved in a breaking of the Prime Directive that resulted in the destruction of a world and the ‘Enterprise 5′ of bridge officers blamed for the tragedy being shunned and hated wherever they go (ah, that utopian Star Trek future, predicting an entire population that’s politically engaged).

Now, with the command crew scattered, everyone’s trying to get back to the planet where it all happened to find out what tf went down for reals. In a bit of a stretch, this is really hard for them--no one seems to be able to call in a favor or hire Han Solo to take them there or anything, which I suppose is in keeping with Star Trek 3′s similar situation six years prior. They don’t have to go so far as to steal a Constitution-class this time. I suppose it’s fitting for the wild and woolly TOS era. In TNG time, they’d probably be able to dial a Space Uber. (As it turns out, it seems like if they’d just coordinated their plans, they all could’ve hitched a ride with Spock, but then there’d be no book, much less a Giant Book.)

Anyway, Kirk’s been court-martialed and is working as an asteroid miner, Chekov and Sulu fall in with Orion pirates, Spock is challenging the whole thing in court, and Uhura’s in jail........oh. It’s like that, huh, Starfleet?

Like I said, most of the plot involves the crew going off on all their separate adventures, eventually getting the band back together and figuring out what went down. Apparently, the book was criticized for its nonlinear structure, but I think it worked out really well. Starting months after the incident, with everyone disgraced, gets you pumped to find out what happened. Then when they flashback to the shit going down, there’s a great sense of foreboding because you know something is going to happen, just not what exactly.

If I can make a criticism, it’s that after some great build-up, the ending seems a bit anticlimactic. The nature of the threat requires some unbelievable Hollywood Evolution to buy (nothing new for Star Trek, admittedly, and this is a crew that’s fresh off meeting Apollo and Abraham Lincoln) and while it is fitting that they’re able to resolve the situation without blowing up anything or punching anyone (Star Trek loves to talk the talk about how anti-military it is, then end their movie with some Klingons getting blasted), it still seems a little... dry. You’re not going to have Kirk hang off of anything, story? Not even a little? Okay. I still had fun.

And you’ll note that once again, Deanna Troi was of no help whatsoever. Geez, woman, you’re oh for three here!

#star trek #peter david #judith and garfield reeves-stevens

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strrne · 5 years ago

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If Disney ever made an obi-wan tv show, starring ewan mcgregor of course, what are some things that you’d want to see in it?

thanks for the question anon! according to the most recent rumors, I think we might just be getting one…?

unpopular opinion. I was pretty ambivalent about the Obi-Wan movie (originally it was supposed to be a movie, like Solo) from the very beginning. Obi-Wan's Tatooine years have their place in canon, I think, but for me personally? I'd relegate them to the lower tiers of canon, like the novels and comics. heck, I'd prefer leave that to the fanfics, because heaven forbid something be left to the fans' imagination. like sure, there's stories to explore there, but the overall premise is much like parallel parking to me. you gotta figure out how to fit it comfortably between two sets of untouchable canon, which kinda makes some of it… almost predictable to me? like, yeah, he's going to be sad. the Jedi are gone, Anakin is gone… oh there's little Luke being a paragon of innocence. sure puts a doleful smile on my face. sand, sand, sand… unsung heroism. sparsely furnished hovel. Anakin's lightsaber. sadness, loneliness, angst. Anakin is Vader??!!! get out of town!

maybe this is an overly cynical viewpoint, so I'll try to be positive. after all, I enjoyed Rogue One and even ended up liking Solo for what it was, despite the fact that both were set during a very specific point in the timeline and a little too concerned with explaining existing canon and tying it all together. so there's no reason that I wouldn't potentially enjoy this one, too? and, let's be real, even if the end product is abysmal, like I'm NOT gonna watch lol.

my final caveat is that… I usually try not to make 'wish lists' in regards to media I consume. sure, I'll form my opinions on the plot and the characters and draw my own conclusions about what I think is going to happen vs. what I would like to happen… but I try not to get too invested in my own headcanons/theories/ideas (in this context. fanfics are an entirely different animal bwahahaha). the production of (Hollywood) media is an extremely complicated process involving many, many creative minds and decision-makers and external factors, so I don't really see the point of actively wanting something to happen and then being inevitably disappointed. at this point I've sort of internalized this mindset, so these days I go to movies/watch shows etc. with an open mind, looking forward to seeing the story unfold the way it unfolds. then I will either like, it or not like it, or land somewhere in between.

(tl;dr, it's complicated, actual answer + actual positivity starts below!)

what I would like to see in an Obi-Wan solo series:

I'll just go ahead and assume this will take place during his Tatooine years following the events of rots.

- I'd definitely want to see a cameo from Hayden Christensen, maybe even have him on as a recurring character, or rather, a presence, in the form of a hallucination/dream or some such. I'm an unabashed fan of Hayden's portrayal of Anakin, flawed directing and all, and I don't really see myself getting invested in the show the same way if the character of Anakin, arguably the most important relationship in Obi-Wan's life, is merely given a throw-away mention or a shot of his lightsaber and maybe a leitmotif. I also don't see the inevitable Vader 'reveal' having the same emotional weight if Anakin, his past self, is not given proper focus and… well, literal presence.

- and you know… you kind of need Qui-Gon there as well? (you're Disney, slap some of that de-aging magic on Liam Neeson if you need to.) I mean… he's literally a Force Ghost at this point, and kind of also an important figure in Obi-Wan's life… and that Force Ghost training, anyone? and then they could be sad about Anakin together, yay! and you could also do flashbacks with these two. or with Anakin! or both!

- MAUUUUUUUUL nah, jk. :D but then again it would be HILARIOUS. and I'll take hilarious over predictable.

- I would love to have at least one episode (or even a major theme) dedicated to the clones (Temuera Morrison yaaayy), like some Empire defectors or Clone War deserters who kind of just cross paths with him (on an unremarkable, obscure planet like Tatooine I think it's entirely believable). there could be some tension/mistrust between them first (kind of like in Rebels), but Obi-Wan, of course, would get to showcase his strengths as a communicator and they would sort out the whole Order 66 disaster and the Republic slave labor thingy and… uh, become BFFs? up until Obi would go, this has been nice, but I'm already late for my infinite sadness over there, may the Force be with you, gentlemen.

- obviously there would be some Friendly Neighborhood Space Wizard stuff. go settle those disputes and help those orphans and overthrow some crime lords. bonus points if this is used to explore his Anakin-related angst as he reminisces about how Anakin always wanted to return to Tatooine and free the slaves. and then maybe he has an epiphany like, yeah, this is how the Jedi should have been serving the Galaxy all along. we meant well but made mistakes etc etc. which will result in a THEME and also it will be fun to see how he accomplishes all these small acts of heroism without attracting too much attention but at the same time gaining that 'weird old hermit' reputation.

- I wouldn't mind seeing Owen and Beru Lars as recurring characters. a simple cameo would feel a little hollow, as they are literally Tatooine residents and Obi's next-door neighbors almost and they get a REALLY rough deal in the OT. one of my biggest gripes with the OT is Luke's complete non-reaction to the violent deaths of his foster parents (they ARE his parents! they raised him from infancy! hello???) and while that can't necessarily be 'fixed' here, I would at least love to see them being a little family and living their simple lives.

- there's nothing to stop Obi-Wan from visiting other planets from time to time. I think the Tatooine setting would eventually get a little too limited and tedious. I would especially love to see Alderaan in all its glory, before… well ya know. and then the Royal family would have to cameo. little Leia, and BREHA ORGANA! (and Bail, of course.)

- this is getting into the 'wildly improbable' territory, but maybe you could bring back a couple of Padmé's handmaidens (Sabé?) and we could have some Padmé feels? they could even team up with Obi on a mission or something! there's your resident Action Girl right there. also, my memory of the Rebels/Ahsoka novel canon is a little fuzzy, so this would probably be somehow contradictory, but… AHSOKA.

- but since there would inevitably be new characters… my only wish is that they would be well thought-out and interesting (which is subjective, I know). also, you're Disney, you have the budget to do aliens, do aliens. more aliens pls.

I could come up with more, and there's probably something really obvious I'm missing or maybe an error in there somewhere, but here are some of the things I would like to see on an Obi-Wan show. as you can probably tell, I'm conflicted. on one hand, I'm one of those fans who never really actively needed for this to be a thing, but if you get me going about its potential, I actually get kind of excited. the limited scope thingy is a bit meh to me (yes, I say this as a fan of the prequels) since as a consumer of media I'm fond of such things as stakes, surprises, plot twists and creative freedom, and as someone with imagination I don't really need every time period in SW canon to be covered in meticulous detail. BUT! if the Obi-Wan show does happen, one thing is for sure: I will be really happy for Ewan McGregor, who I know absolutely adores his character and has been very open about his desire to play him again.

(but also; seriously, ya better deliver on the Christensen.)

#obi wan kenobi #obi wan solo series #ewan mcgregor #ask #about me #star wars

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dororoscutesmile · 5 years ago

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Summer anime preliminary reviews

Short, sweet, and to the point. I watched the first episode every new series so that you (hopefully) don’t have to! I try to make my brief reviews as unbiased as possible. My top recommendations from a variety of genres first, then the rest under the readmore in the order I personally liked them. There are a LOT of good anime this season, and I definitely recommend more than the first five.

Kanata no astra

Sci-fi/action. In a future full of space travel, a group of high schoolers are suddenly and mysteriously transported over 5,000 light years away from their home planet; they now must survive and work together aboard an abandoned ship trying to get home. The first episode is long and cinematic, which suits it perfectly. This one seems to have everything; action, mystery, comedy, wonderful character dynamics, sad backstories -- and all done very well. It’s going to be one of the best of the season.

Araburu kisetsu no otome-domo yo

High school/drama/comedy. This one is all about sex -- but it’s not ecchi or fan servicey. Girls in a literature club who are ignorant about sex make it their goal to learn about it as they make their way toward adulthood. If you don’t mind high schoolers speaking frankly about sex and their desires for it, but NOT in a way that seems objectifying or unnecessarily “sexualizing,” then this is an engaging coming-of-age story. It’s certainly different, and I believe it handles the topic tactfully and realistically.

Machikado Mazoku

Comedy/magic. A high school girl wakes up from a dream that reveals she is a demon who must defeat a magical girl and restore her family’s honor. This one’s really funny! It’s a fun twist on the “magical girl” genre. The main character is ditzy in a cute way, and she and the aloof magical girl play off each other really well. I was expecting to be bored based on the synopsis, but I ended up liking this a lot. Whatever you think of the magical girl genre, this series looks great.

Toaru Kagaku no Accelerator

Supernatural/action. In a city full of espers, the previously strongest one is recovering in the hospital after being shot in the head and is now being hunted down by a group of thieves using a special weapon. The main character is the cool, aloof, angry type. Intelligent, cocky, overpowered, an appealing design, and a soft spot for a small child. This character, rather than the plot, is what really drives this anime, at least so far. If he’s your type of character, then this is your type of anime.

Given

Music/BL. A high schooler who has lost passion for his hobbies meets another boy with a guitar with broken strings. He repairs the strings, and the boy starts following him around asking him to teach him guitar. Not much really happens in the first episode, but there are hints of a romance between the boys, which is obviously expected from BL. The animation with the instruments is good, and the characters have potential. For fans of BL or even just the music genre, this one seems pretty solid.

Dr. Stone

Sci-fi/adventure. This takes place in a future where all humans have turned to stone. The protagonists are one that is plain but charming, and another who is an enjoyable smart-ass; together, they start trying to revive all the people who were turned to stone. The characters’ dynamic together isn’t particularly interesting, but each character is enjoyable in their own right. There’s science, primitive technology, and some mystery in this. It’s definitely worth a watch.

Okaa-san Online/Tsuujou Kougeki ga…

Fantasy/comedy. A strange government program sends a boy and his mother into an online game. Having a mother and son dynamic here along with their generational gap in video game knowledge certainly makes for an interesting premise. The mom has a great personality and is surprising in a number of ways, and you can expect family bonding in this as the son is reluctant to have any kind of adventure with his mother. It’s cute!

Bem

Supernatural/horror. Three good youkai fight against evil youkai, trying to save humans as well as become humans themselves. At the same time, there’s a female police officer who gets involved and is fighting against corruption in the city. Warning for some gore. The tone of this show is jazzy and gritty, taking place largely on dark city streets. The characters have yet to be fully fleshed out, but the gritty tone is unique this season.

UchiMusume/Uchi no musume/Uchi no ko...

Fantasy/found family. Also known as “If it’s for my daughter, I’d even defeat a demon lord.” A young man meets an orphaned demon girl and adopts her as his daughter. This is incredibly, incredibly sweet. The first episode is very good at setting up the father-daughter relationship and making you care a lot about the little girl. If you want a cute and pure found-family story, this is the one.

Nakanohito Genome

Gaming/comedy. A group of various gamers are suddenly placed in a real life game where they must play well enough to gather 100 million viewers during what turns out to be a livestream. Think “The Hunger Games” but with gamers. The characters are fun, and it’s an interesting premise worth giving a shot. Give it two episodes before making up your mind, I think.

Kochouki: Wakaki Nobunaga

Historical/action. Based on the real historical figure Oda Nobunaga, starting from his teens and up through adulthood as a warlord. This was surprisingly engaging. The characters and the history are both interesting, and it does a good job of humanizing the historical figures. If you like historical anime, this one’s for you.

Yami shibai - Japanese ghost stories

Technically a returning series, not a new one, but it’s more of an anthology kind of series that doesn’t require previous viewing. Very short episodes, and exactly what it says on the tin. The animation is suitably creepy, and it’s great for a little scare.

Arifureta shokugyou de sekai saikyou

Harem/fantasy. A high school class was transported to a fantasy world where all but the main character gained powerful magical powers, whereas the main character only got a single common skill, and he is ostracized for it. Betrayed and dropped into a dungeon alone, he must fight his way out with newfound powers. The protagonist is engaging, and the action is alright, but the first episode doesn’t reveal much about the plot honestly. It could be worth giving a shot.

Enen no shouboutai

Sci-fi/action. In a not-too-distant future, humans have begun to spontaneously combust. Some have gained the ability to do this at will and retain their human form. A young man who can light his feet on fire at will joins a special task force of, essentially, firefighters who deal with the deadly combustions. This one’s got mystery, an engaging and well-designed misunderstood protagonist, and great action sequences.

Isekai cheat magician

Fantasy/adventure. Two high schoolers are transported into a magical world much like in an RPG. They join an adventurer’s guild where they learn they have unbelievably strong magical powers. The first episode merely sets up the premise, but the main characters’ friendship dynamic is nice, and it has good potential for an “another world” genre show, especially if you tend to like overpowered protagonists.

Vinland Saga

Action/historical. A viking boy, based on a historical Icelandic explorer, hones his skills to avenge his father. Solid animation, high quality in most aspects honestly, but a very slow start to the story. The first three episodes were released all at once, and it seems like they might together be a sort of prologue to the real story. If you don’t mind a slower pace and you enjoy vikings and/or historical shows, this does have a solid plot and solid character building.

Katsute Kami Datta Kemono-tachi e

Action/fantasy. The premise of this is somewhat similar to Fairy Gone. One side of a civil war turned to using magic in order to create monstrous super soldiers. They start to develop symptoms that make them too dangerous, and now in a time of peace, one of them makes it his duty to hunt the rest. If you like the action genre, this seems pretty solid. The first episode was just a setup for the premise, but the main character is interesting, and the action scenes are pretty good.

Dumbbell nan kilo moteru

Girls lifting weights! There’s what some may call fatshaming in this right from the start, so if that puts you off, you may want to avoid. Very fanservice-y. But If you’re into the “muscle girl” look, this probably won’t scratch that itch. The female body types actually seem pretty average for anime (even the “chubby” girl) despite the heavy focus on strength training. The main character has a cute personality, and the show is fun with some actual strength training tips.

Cop Craft

Sci-fi/buddy cop. In a city near a rift between Earth and other worlds, a male human police officer and a female alien team up to fight crime. There’s not much to say about this one, it’s exactly what you’d expect from the buddy cop genre with aliens mixed in. It’s good for what it is, and the character dynamic of the two protagonists being opposites is good, so if you like the buddy cop genre, you’ll like this.

Maou-sama, retry!

Fantasy/adventure. A man is transported into a video game that he manages, a world in which is powerful due to his administrative controls over the game and is seen as a “Demon Lord.” He befriends and protects a young disabled girl who joins him on his journey, and their dynamic is interesting. This is a pretty generic anime, but if the “normal guy is transported into a fantasy world” trope appeals to you, you’ll like it.

Sounan desu ka

Adventure/comedy. After a plane crash, a group of high school girls must survive on an isolated island. There’s plenty of “fan service” (things like upskirt shots) which may make some uncomfortable. If that doesn’t put you off, this is otherwise a cute show with an interesting survival aspect to it, where you might actually learn real survival tips.

HenSuki/Kawaikereba hentai demo suki ni natte kuremasu ka

Harem/comedy/light ecchi. The genre alone should tell you nearly as much as you need to know if this one’s for you. A high school boy who wants a girlfriend finds a love letter left for him, along with a pair of panties. He then tries to figure out which of the girls in his life left the letter. There’s not too much to say about it. A cast of mildly perverted girls, and exactly everything else you’d expect.

Joshikousei no mudazukai

Comedy/high school. A group of girls with very different personalities try to navigate their new high school lives, with the main character being obsessed with finding a boyfriend despite being at an all girls school. This is silly and cute, very light in substance, but a nice break from more serious anime.

Tejina-senpai

Comedy/ecchi. A high school boy looking to join a club stumbles upon a girl practicing magic tricks in a “magic club”; however, she makes mistakes during every trick, and he has to help her out when her tricks don’t come out as planned. Keep in mind that this is in the ecchi genre and therefore aimed at tantalizing straight male viewers. If that’s your thing, you’ll find this to be a very cute and funny show.

Granbelm

Fantasy/action. This is a sort of magical girl mecha anime, from what I can tell. A high school girl is temporarily transported into an “illusionary” world full of magic where she learns she’s a descendent of a mage. There’s a heavy focus on both lore building and action scenes. If you wanna see magical girls fight in big mecha suits, this is the place to do it.

Hakata mentai Pirikarako-chan

Slice of life/comedy. Very short episodes about a little girl named Pirikarako. It seems to be mainly for children, having talking fruits in it and being animated in an overly cute style. It’s hard to explain, but it’s very silly and cute.

Re:Stage! Dream Days

Idol/slice of life. A middle school transfer student stumbles upon her school’s “lyrical club,” the members of which want to become idols, only the new girl turns out to have been an idol in the past. The girls are cute, and the singing/dancing parts are fun.

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thevillagewitch918 · 6 years ago

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Shadow People

Story

I was out alone at night, hanging out at the playground by my house. there was an apparition of a girl in a white dress standing behind me staring at me. I don’t know why but I continued to stay at the playground to hang out. That is when I saw it. I saw a long spindly humanoid like shadowy figure running, it was not running towards me, but when I saw it I was instilled with an intense fear, none like I have ever experienced before. I promptly left the premises and tried to forget that night. But nonetheless, I could not. The image of the inhumanly tall and inhumanly fast figure was etched into my brain for the rest of my life. I talked to my psychiatrist about it to see if it was a hallucination, she said it didn’t meet the criteria of a hallucination. I talked to my eye doctor to see if there were floaters in my eyes, I did not have any floaters in my eyes. Eventually, it compelled me to do research. I googled “Tall shadowy figure” and I found what it was that I saw. It was a Shadow Person.

What is a shadow person?

A lot of people say many things about shadow people. Some call them misguided spirits, some call them curious ghosts. Others call them aliens. As for me, with the research I did, I have come to the conclusion that they are low-level demons. Here to guide people to an untimely death. They appear as a tall (6ft or higher) shadowy human-like figure, sometimes they run, sometimes they lurk, some even have glowing red eyes.

Shadow people Vs. Ghosts

there are quite a few similarities to ghosts and Shadow people, but there are unmistakable differences as well. First of all, if you can see it in your frontal vision, it is most likely a ghost. Shadow people have only been seen in peripheral vision. Secondly, there is an unmistakable intense fear instilled in one who even catches a glance upon a shadow person. Now that we have gone through the differences there are also similarities. Some ghosts will appear as shadowy sometimes, but they will not be inhumanly tall like a shadow person. You might also feel an intense fear when seeing a ghost if you are afraid of ghosts.

What does it mean if I see a shadow person?

It can mean a lot of things, first, let’s look at you. How have you been feeling? Have you been feeling depressed? Are you addicted to anything of any kind? Has your mood been negative? These questions are essential to ask yourself because demons are attracted to lower vibrations. If you have been lowering your vibration with drugs, alcohol, or any kind of unhealthy relationship (even with things) it may be that the shadow person has locked on to you and you might need a cleansing. However, if that doesn’t apply to you, perhaps it is the place the shadow person has locked onto. If you can, do some research on the place where you saw the shadow person? There may be a history of bad things happening at that place and it could explain why you have been seeing the shadow person or people. If this place is your house, it might be time to do a cleansing of your house.

How to get rid of a shadow person.

I’m going to take the approach that one would use for a demon since I see them as low-level demons. If you do not see them that way then please disregard this. -For a place- (if you are doing this at a place other than your house, be sure to get permission first.) Step one: Clean the place. The more cluttered it is the more likely the cleansing is not going to work, so the first step is to do some old fashioned cleaning, dusting, organizing, whatever you can do. Step Two: Open some windows. This will give the shadow person, a place to leave. If you do not do this, you might end up agitating it and it could possibly get worse. Step three: Ground yourself and cast a circle of protection around you. This could be anything; you can envision a ball of light from your higher self or a higher power. Step four: recaning. Recaning is basically smoke cleansing, you can use sage, or incense or even dried herbs, remember to practice fire safety. Step Five: go around the house, state your intention for the shadow person to leave, be sure to smoke cleanse all around the house and the corners too. Step Six: Close the windows, and seal all entrances with a protective symbol (crosses, pentacles, and sigils would work.) be sure to get the windows and fireplace(s) as well And that should do it. -For a person- (if you are doing this on someone other than yourself be sure to get consent first) Step one: assess your lifestyle, have you been doing something that could have attracted this shadow person towards you? If so what is it? You need to be honest with yourself. Step Two: Make changes in your life, to get rid of the negative energy. Surround yourself with supportive people who will encourage you and not hinder you in your journey. Step three: Find ways to raise your vibration, this could be meditation, eating better, exercising, and replacing unhealthy lifestyles with healthy ones. Step Four: Seek help. Whether it is therapy, psychiatry, or a recovery group, get some help on your side. Step Five: do a recaning on yourself, or go get a reiki healing. Do something to cleanse your aura and raise your vibration even further. Step Six: If all else fails, get someone advanced in ridding demons from people. And that should do it.

Conclusion

Whether you agree with what I believe shadow people are, or you have your own opinion, I think we can all agree not to mess with them. There can be similarities between ghosts and shadow people but there are also intense differences. If you have any comments, questions, or concerns, feel free to ask me or message me anything.

#shadow people #how to get rid of shadow people #demon #demons #how to get rid of demons

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keybangs · 6 years ago

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Tagged by: MY SAMI SAMI @jinkisbelly it’s been forever since I’ve done a tag thingie so thaaaaaaanks!!!!!!

RULES: tag ten followers you want to know better

STAR SIGN: Leo

HEIGHT: 5′10″ or 5′11″ ish? honestly no one can give me a straight answer lmaooo

PUT YOUR ITUNES/SPOTIFY ON SHUFFLE. WHAT ARE THE FIRST 4 SONGS THAT POP UP? lol it’s funny though because I havent even heard these songs in forever lmao. shuffle is so weird...

1.Ed Sheeran- Galway Girl

2.The Script- No Words

3.Sublime- Pawn Shop

4.Lil Wayne+Charlie Puth-Nothing But Trouble (Instagram Models)

GRAB THE BOOK NEAREST TO YOU AND TURN TO PAGE 23. WHAT’S LINE 17? “The bravest will go first,” Beocca said to me, “and your father...”

EVER HAD A POEM OR SONG WRITTEN ABOUT YOU? not to my knowledge! hahaha

WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU PLAYED AIR GUITAR? this morning in the car after I dropped my mom off at work lmaoo. I was listening to Aerosmith so it’s kind of a requirement.

WHO IS YOUR CELEBRITY CRUSH? HAHAHAHA which one...ummm obviously Kibum, Edgar Ramirez, Norman Reedus, Alexander Dreymon ummmmmmm idk probably dozens other. im a ho

WHAT’S A SOUND YOU HATE + SOUND YOU LOVE? hmmm honestly it depends, I can have a bad day when literally the sound of people talking makes me want to scream. I hate any loud sound tbh. but a sound I love, now that I can say without a doubt is the sound of the ocean. I don’t love anything more ^-^

DO YOU BELIEVE IN GHOSTS? eh, I really have no opinion one way or another. I can’t see them so I can’t say one way or another if i think there are any.

HOW ABOUT ALIENS? for damn sure! the universe is giant! who knows what else is out there in the infinite unknown.

DO YOU DRIVE? IF SO, HAVE YOU EVER CRASHED? ye! ummmm well it was a small crash, panic throttled right into this guy in the parking lot at my university. he was speeding down the row after I had already checked for cars and when I finally saw him I accidentally hit the gas lmaooo. took out his whole rear corner panel.

WHAT WAS THE LAST BOOK YOU READ? completed? or like currently reading? Last book I finished was My Sweet Audrina by V.C. Andrews. shes my favorite! but I’m currently rereading The Last Kingdom by Bernard Cornwell.

DO YOU LIKE THE SMELL OF GASOLINE? I used to, now it makes me nauseous.

WHAT WAS THE LAST MOVIE YOU SAW? Point Break, the 2015 version. I love it soooooo much...refer back to question 7 LOL but also I just love the premise a lot more than the original. has deeper meaning to me. and I am a certifiable tree hugger and almost Psych expert so it’s a lot more interesting to me...I could go on forever about that movie lmao.

WHAT’S THE WORST INJURY YOU’VE EVER HAD? hmmmm I was bit by a spider on my knee last year and couldn’t walk for three days. felt like fire in my entire leg.

DO YOU HAVE ANY OBSESSIONS RIGHT NOW? HAHAHAHAH I’m always obsessed with something, ummm currently obsessed with The Walking Dead. my heart was ripped out last night and fed to me on a silver platter sooooo there’s that lol.

DO YOU TEND TO HOLD GRUDGES AGAINST PEOPLE WHO HAVE DONE YOU WRONG?��Nah. I let it go. I never forget though. there’s a huuuuuge difference. It’s not worth my energy or mental health to hold a grudge, but people don’t get the opportunity to fool me twice if you know what I’m sayin hahaha

IN A RELATIONSHIP? Only with like at least four men....in my head. so I guess ummmmm no? hahahaha

oh mannnnn um ok 10 people @menofkpop (DO IT KIM) @ultrakdramamama @moksurideonew @bywater-bree @markwarddimsum @yougotmeyugyeomie and ummmm anyone else that wants to do it just say I tagged you LOL sorry I suck

#personal #tag thingie

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narumi-gens · 3 years ago

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I’m so glad you’re enjoying Dandadan Mel! And I’m also glad you caught up and really are enjoying Sakamoto Days, it’s sooo good and always brightens up my sundays. Shin and all of Sakamoto’s gang are absolute babies and need to be protected at all costs but Gaku? GAKU? 👀 With absolutely no respect I say I need him to assassinate this pu- I mean heh 😇

Also, Goodbye Eri !? Ohhh it was soo good. I think this might be my favourite Fujimoto work by far it was freaking amazing.

Hope you’ve had a good week so far, almost Friday! Wee~ 💕

- 💀 🌸

I'm enjoying Dandadan soooooo much! It's definitely not for everyone but I love its wild mix of comedy, adorableness, horror, and absolute batshit craziness. I'm trying really hard to not blow right through and take my time but I'm already halfway through reading it 🙈 Also I will never get over the premise 😫 A boy who believes in aliens and a girl who believes in ghosts falling in love??? That's like everything I want in life. Also I found out that the mangaka used to be an assistant for Kaku and Fujimoto which just makes me so happy.

Sakamoto Days really took me by surprise with how much I like it bc I really wasn't vibing with it for maybe the first 15 or so chapters but now absolutely love it. Like the whole found family of it all is just so 🥰 Plus Shin. Shin is just so 🥰 It's taking every ounce of self-control I have not to write the fic I have in mind for him but I can't be out here writing for another fandom that has like 10 of us in it 😫 And yes. Gaku 😳 You must be loving the latest chapters lollll

I like cannot even comprehend how much Goodbye Eri got me. Fujimoto is seriously stepping it up with every new thing he puts out. My favorite thing that Fujimoto does is that he's never afraid of "wasting pages" and will just dedicate whole pages filled with panels of the same image or only a few panels that really get across the emotions of the scenes and Goodbye Eri was that at its peak. I'm just so excited to see what part two of csm looks like if this is what Fujimoto does in his free time.

And yes! My week was amazing. It was my first week at the new job and it was just so positive that even though the weekend is almost over, I'm not feeling any dread about work tomorrow (other than the usual "wish I didn't have to do anything tomorrow" typical end-of-weekend angst).

Drink lots of water and get lots of rest for this week 💀 🌸 anon!

#everyone come talk to me about dandadan #mel answers

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rosylipsandcheeks · 6 years ago

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rules: answer the questions and tag people you wanna get to know better

tagged by: @kylotiddies hello, new mutual!

name: anna

star sign: capricorn

height: 5′7″ and 1/2

what’s your middle name?: catherine

put your iTunes on shuffle. what are the first four songs that popped up?: (i have a streaming service so here’s random songs i listen to) défiler by stromae / fiji by taco hemingway / batphone by arctic monkeys / rachmaninoff’s 3rd piano concerto

grab the book nearest to you and turn to page 23. what’s line 17?: “It was as if he had sent the cable without consulting her and had afterwards told her. Indeed, that was pretty much what had happened, except that he had told the girl and the girl told the wife.” Ford Madox Ford The Good Soldier

had a poem or song written about you?: no

when was the last time you played air guitar?: yesterday :) Alex Turner does that to ya

who is your celebrity crush?: oof i admire and follow many talented folks but one (1) sasquatch acting powerhouse adam douglas driver claimed me

what sound do you hate + sound you love?: hate the sound of a clock ticking too loudly in the dead of night, love the repetitive, soothing sound of a train

do you believe in ghosts?: no

how about aliens?: no

do you drive?: yes, i love to

what was the last book you read?: sw’s aftermath

do you like the smell of gasoline?: i always have

what was the last movie you saw?: the phantom menace (i knowwww, i’m watching the prequels after many years of useless denial as i did love them as a teen - surprisingly, for what it is and what it’s premise is, it’s an okay movie and made me even more excited for ep ix)

do you have any obsessions right now?: star wars, the r/eylo fandom, exercise, tranquility base hotel and casino

do you tend to hold grudges against people who have done you wrong?: i hope less and less so, i put tonnes of work into that

in a relationship?: no

tagging @kylorenema @janenightwork @lilacandrain @selfishjean @frenetic-torpor

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onimiman · 6 years ago

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Halloween 2018 Film Retrospective (no major spoilers ahead)

Throughout the entirety of the month of October 2018, I had watched a movie everyday that was, in at least some tangential way, related to Halloween. I can't really call all of them horror films (and to find out why, please see below), although I will say that many of them were unfortunately films that ranged from mediocre to downright unwatchable; had I not been forcing myself to watch these movies for the month, I would have given up ten minutes or so in. And I know I'm a bit late to the party since I'm only posting this on November 3rd, but fuck it, here's the list anyway. So without further ado, let's begin this retrospective with not the first film I watched this October, but the last film I watched for September, which I will call Film #0.

#0: The Babysitter (2017)

The plot: A twelve-year-old boy still hangs out with his babysitter when his parents are away, and just as he is developing deeper feelings for her, he learns a dark secret about her and her friends. This prompts him to undergo a night of survival that forces him to grow up and move on from his own feelings of inadequacy.

My thoughts: This movie feels like it was somehow a holdover script from the 1990s; when the film brings up an element from 1996's hit movie Independence Day, a movie that no one gives a shit about anymore (see how its sequel, 2016's Independence Day: Resurgence, flopped hard at the box office), it serves as only one piece of evidence for that claim. However, I did find the movie to be quite fun nonetheless, even if not all of the jokes in this horror comedy quite landed the way they intended to, but to me, it did have a stable story structure and everything storywise paid off with what was established early on. It's an easy less than 90 minutes to kill on Netflix and I recommend it even if you're not a horror fan.

#1: Leatherface (2017)

The plot: In this prequel to Tobe Hooper's seminal 1974 horror classic The Texas Chain Saw Massacre, we see the birth of the cannibalistic Sawyer family's iconic member turn into this film's titular villain.

My thoughts: By all means, this was a stupid and unnecessary film that shouldn't have been made. But I went into this expecting to simply be entertained by the violence and gore that was to come about. And was I? Yes, I was, and admittedly, the film did make me feel stupid in misleading me as to who Leatherface was going to be, even though there was a piece of evidence in the movie that did make me think, “Naw, it couldn't be.” So, for that, I can't completely shit on this film. If you're not a fan of gore, you'll despise this movie, but for me, it's a guilty pleasure by far.

#2: The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003)

The plot: In this remake of Tobe Hooper's seminal 1974 horror classic The Texas Chain Saw Massacre... pretty much the same shit from that film occurs in this one with only a few slight differences.

My thoughts: Having watched this not long after watching Leatherface, I knew that I was going to get something significantly more conventional, and boy did I get it. It's as boring and unmemorable as most other horror films from the 2000s are, and if I wasn't doing this retrospective, I would have forgotten this one altogether. And moreover, the kills in this are so much more disappointing than in Leatherface, with little to no gore here, so I can't even watch this from the POV of basic primal enjoyment. Skip this one whether you're a horror fan or not.

#3: Goosebumps (2015)

The plot: What starts off as a boy-meets-girl story turns into a spooktacular tale of adventure that involves stopping an army of monsters that come directly from the mind of children's horror author R.L. Stine.

My thoughts: This is a movie that I imagined that I would have enjoyed watching as a kid every now and then, especially during Halloween, but as it stands, it's a little too dull for me and it makes me question what kind of threat do any of these monsters pose to our characters if they never actually kill anyone. It's still fun, if even in a standard way, and Jack Black as R.L. Stine, while incredibly hokey in the role, is obviously having a lot of fun here, so for that, I guess I can recommend this one if you have kids. There's nothing in here that'll actually scare them (unless they're a young Justin Bieber type who'll have nightmares over fucking Scooby-Doo) so you won't have anything to worry about showing them this.

#4: Silent Hill (2006)

The plot: When a young woman takes her adopted daughter to a ghost town called Silent Hill to solve the mystery of the girl's nightmares, they are quickly separated from one another and plunged into a dark demented world with hints of a core secret that must be solved.

My thoughts: I heard about how bad this one was for years, but as I was watching it once the characters actually reached Silent Hill, I found myself enjoying it and finding it to be a legitimately scary movie. The problem? The payoff at the end. I don't know if this is the payoff in the game, but the solution somehow felt a little too mundane and I kind of eye-rolled at the film's jabs at religion (and I speak as someone who's not religious at all). Decent movie for the most part, but I can't really recommend it on account of where it all leads.

#5: Venom (2018)

The plot: When disgraced San Francisco journalist Eddie Brock sneaks into the lab owned by the business magnate who ruined his career, he is bonded to an alien parasite who gives him extraordinary abilities and the antihero persona of Venom. Together, Eddie and Venom must work together if they are to take down business magnate Carlton Drake and the symbiote that he bonded to, Riot, before they can unleash a symbiote invasion upon Earth.

My thoughts: Okay, I know this is kind of cheating because it's not really a horror film in a conventional sense, but since the movie deals with a man being bonded to something that can kill him from the inside if they are both not properly fed, I thought I'd include this movie in this retrospective. Now, with that being said, I found this movie to be pretty standard for a superhero film, and in the year that films like Black Panther, Avengers: Infinity War, and Deadpool 2 came out, Venom looks kind of subpar in comparison. However, as standard as the story and action scenes were, I still enjoyed it for what it was, and as cliched as it is to say this now, Tom Hardy as both Eddie and Venom have some magnificent chemistry that makes me want to see more of them in a sequel. I'd recommend it, but with this stipulation: Only if you're not too versed in superhero films.

#6: Halloween III: Season of the Witch (1982)

The plot: A pair of mysterious death leads a medical doctor and the daughter of one of the victims to investigate a conspiracy in a Halloween mask-producing factory that can have far-reaching consequences.

My thoughts: I regret seeing this movie for only one reason: That this wasn't the film I saw for October 31st, because this is, by far, the most Halloweeniest movie I have ever seen. Otherwise, I enjoyed this movie more than I did the original 1978 Halloween or any of its sequels or remakes (which I'll get to later in this retrospective). While not exactly having the best atmosphere, Halloween III: Season of the Witch is a very interesting movie that is draped in its titular holiday, with a unique premise to boot, that is kind of suspenseful, even if it doesn't have a real resolution. It's a film I wouldn't mind rewatching for next year, especially if it's a rainy day.

#7: Final Girl (2015)

The plot: A teenage girl is trained in rigorous self-defense techniques by a mysterious man for the purpose of combating those who seek to wrong others.

My thoughts: As trite as that premise may sound, it's still very interesting in execution, especially if one is familiar with horror movie tropes like the defenseless teenage girl who wins at the end despite all odds against her. It's decently acted and directed, it runs at just the right length, and if I have any complaints about it, I just wish we went into this movie with our killers believing that this was just going to be another of their victims so that we could be surprised at the turn of events. Other than that mil critique, it's a quaint, simple film that you could watch on Netflix on a rainy day like the previous movie above.

#8: ThanksKilling (2008)

The plot: A 500-year-old talking turkey is brought back to life via dog urine on his grave and intends to kill the nearest people nearby.

My thoughts: This movie was an abominable piece of shit that's as unbelievable in every way as the premise that I laid out above. I'm not even joking about the dog piss thing either; that's how the killer comes back. The filmmaking here is student-level amateurish, the acting in it is jaw-droppingly bad, and this film's attempts at trying to be humorous make me want to punch a cat. Never watch this movie ever.

#9: Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers (1988)

The plot: Ten years after his killing spree in 1978's Halloween and 1981's Halloween II, Michael Myers has returned (as the title would indicate). With his sister Laurie Strode having died in a car accident in between films, Michael's new target is his niece, Jamie Lloyd, and his titular return renews the carnage that his psychiatrist, Dr. Sam Loomis, must stop.

My thoughts: A fairly dull film that's only half as decent as the first two films and nowhere near as entertaining as the third. The acting on the parts of Donald Pleasance as Dr. Loomis and Danielle Harris's turn as Jamie Lloyd were the bright spots in this film, and the ending is famous for being one of the most shocking things in this series that is never followed up on. Unfortunately, I can't recommend anyone watch this, whether you're a normie or a Halloween fan, especially considering what follows...

#10: Halloween 5: The Revenge of Michael Myers (1989)

The plot: Pretty much the same shit as the last movie only with more self-aware corniness this time around and a shittier Michael Myers mask.

My thoughts: Ditto from what the plot described. I feel bad for Pleasance and Harris here, they are way too good for this movie.

#11: Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers (1995)

The plot: Michael Myers finally kills his niece Jamie Lloyd, but now must go after her child as per instructions from the Cult of Thorn. But not if Dr. Loomis, Kara Strode, and Tommy Doyle have anything to say about it!

My thoughts: If you thought that how I delivered this plot wasn't exactly all that Halloweeny, believe me, this movie doesn't deserve to be treated with that kind of respect. I honestly don't want to say anything more about this movie except for these two things: what an awful last movie for Donald Pleasance to go out on before he died, and for a first movie, who woulda thought that Paul Rudd could be so damn boring?

#12: Halloween II (2009)

The plot: Director Rob Zombie takes one last shit on the Halloween franchise after his 2007 remake of the first movie debacle. Is it sad that this movie gets less of a respectful plot synopsis than the last three Halloween movies discussed on this list?

My thoughts: I saw Rob Zombie's 2007 Halloween remake in the theater, and it was one of the worst movies I'd seen on the big screen. I'm so glad I missed out on this one when this came out in theaters because holy fuck, this one makes Zombie's first Halloween look like a masterpiece in comparison. I could go on to explain why for those of you haven't seen these movies, but all I have to do is point you to Phelan Porteus's reviews of Rob Zombie's Halloween movies; he'll explain it all.

#13: A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984)

The plot: Deranged child murderer Fred Krueger returns from the dead in the form of a dream demon to kill the teenage offspring of the people who murdered him through those teenagers' dreams.

My thoughts: Finally, a legitimately good movie on this list that I don't have to dismiss as just mindless fun or even scary but with a bad payoff at the end like with Silent Hill. This movie is good even if you're not a horror fan; I whole-heartedly recommend this. And if nothing else, it's interesting to see how young Johnny Depp was, what with this being his first movie, and I could see just what the ladies saw in him back then.

#14: A Nightmare on Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge (1985)

The plot: Freddy's back! And this time, he intends to enter the real world through the form of a troubled teenage boy who may or may not have some repressed feelings about himself...

My thoughts: This movie is about as subtle in its homo-eroticism as a series of Michael Bay explosions (not that I'm against homo-eroticism, since I'm a bisexual myself, I just think that this movie was a little too on the nose with that kind of stuff). And while I did find this movie to be surface-level enjoyable for the creative kills, I can't help but think that this was kind of dull, especially in comparison to the first film and as we move forward with the other sequels. The worst part about this is that I find myself scratching my head as to why this is a Nightmare on Elm Street movie when, in spite of the use of dreams here, this doesn't really feel like the Freddy Krueger we know from the first movie nor does this hold up with the character we see in the subsequent sequels. I don't know how to explain it, but somehow, Freddy's characterization seems off in this one. In spite of this film's inclusion of homo-eroticism, something we seldom see in movies like this, I have no problem saying that you can skip this one.

#15: A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors (1987)

The plot: Nancy Thompson, the sole survivor of the first Nightmare on Elm Street, returns with Freddy Krueger this movie, and this time, she intends to help his intended victims fight back. In a sanitarium for suicidal teens with sleep disorders, Freddy intends to kill the last of the Elm Street children. But Nancy intends to utilize the help of one of the teens, Kristen Parker, who has the special ability to unite people into a single dream space and allow them to develop their own dream powers to counter Freddy. But Freddy isn't as easy to defeat as one may think.

My thoughts: Honestly, this is as good of a sequel as the first Nightmare on Elm Street deserved, as it's a unique take that manages to continue the story of the first in a natural yet unorthodox way, not unlike what Aliens did with Alien. The horror of the first film may be toned down significantly here, but at least the story was interesting, the characters were fun to watch, and Freddy is so much fun here. I recommend it for how Inception-y this movie can get, even if this doesn't have the same level of intelligence as that movie did.

#16: A Nightmare on Elm Street 4: The Dream Master (1988)

The plot: Despite his defeat at the end of the previous film, Freddy Krueger is resurrected and he finally accomplishes his goal of murdering the last of the Elm Street children, accomplishing his goal once and for all. However, Freddy isn't so satisfied; he wants more children and teens to kill, and he will get more, through Kristen Parker's friend, Alice Johnson, to whom Kristen gave her dream-sharing ability. So unless Alice can find a way to stop Freddy, the latter's fun could continue...

My thoughts: I think it's safe to say this is the point in the franchise when all the horror in Freddy Krueger is pretty much gone and replaced with fun schlocky Freddy. And you know what? I'm okay with that, because it's always great to see Robert Englund have fun in this role. And in spite of the writing not being as strong as it was in the first and third films, I still find myself caring about our characters like Alice, and I was genuinely saddened when the last of the Dream Warriors died. It's rare when I can actually feel that kind of sadness for dead meat characters like these. Fun watch, would recommend, but be prepared to look at Freddy in a different light. And stay around after the credits, as Freddy sings a hilarious rap that just made me smile.

#17: A Nightmare on Elm Street 5: The Dream Child (1989)

The plot: Freddy just can't stay dead, for now he has a new dream master to kill people through: Alice Johnson's unborn child, who spends 70% of his life in a dream state in his mother's womb. So how can Alice defeat Freddy this time without having to sacrifice her dream child in the process?

My thoughts: “Faster than a bastard maniac! More powerful than a loco-madman! It's Super-Freddy!” If you don't know what that scene is, I urge you to look it up, as it's the best scene of the whole movie and it really capitalizes on just how much of a joke Freddy Krueger has become at this point in the series. However, unlike the bastardization of a character like Michael Myers in, say, one of Rob Zombie's Halloween movies, Freddy is still an enjoyable enough character where even one who despises the Nightmare sequels overall can still find little jewels like the aforementioned line. Give it a watch if only for just that one scene.

#18: Freddy's Dead: The Final Nightmare (1991)

The plot: Freddy Krueger has all but run out of kills in his hometown, and now he wants to expand nationally. But not if his daughter has anything to say about it!

My thoughts: This has become pure comedy at this point. But my God this is golden. When one of this movie's kills is an extended scene of a guy jumping around with cartoonish sound effects to boot while dreaming that he's in a video game being played by Freddy, you know that the filmmakers know what kind of movie they're making. And I enjoyed this as one of the most guilty pleasure films I'd ever seen. I do think that the film ended on a somewhat anticlimactic note, but alas, the film was an interesting end to Freddy's evolution as a character of horror to a character of dark comedy, and for that, I recommend this one.

#19: Halloween (2018)

The plot: Forty years after he terrorized Haddonfield, Michael Myers has once again escaped from Smith's Grove Hospital to return to where his reign of terror all started. But this time, the one who got away, Laurie Strode, is ready for him... but her daughter and granddaughter may not be.

My thoughts: Aside from Jamie Lee Curtis's fantastic performance in this film, I thought this was just a run-of-the-mill horror film that's competent enough and has its moments but is otherwise forgettable if you forget that this is a Halloween film. If you're a Halloween fan, I think you'll be satisfied; it's certainly better than the majority of its sequels (especially The Curse of Michael Myers and Resurrection) but that's all.

#20: Meet the Blacks (2016)

The plot: During the Purge, the Black family (yes, that's their last name, and yes, the film does make several racially inappropriate jokes about it) move into an upper class white neighborhood where they are confronted by their patriarch's past in the forms of those he's financially wronged in some way or another.

My thoughts: This is only the second worst movie I've seen for this retrospective (yes, ThanksKilling is number one). Aside from all the racist jokes going on here, this movie is just a failure of a comedy and as a spoof/satire of the Purge franchise. It doesn't say anything new or fresh or in any interesting ways, and in fact, some of the “comedy” here just doesn't make any sense (then again, I just might be missing out on a reference, as if that's supposed to justify bad comedy). This movie may have been less than 90 minutes, but my God, it felt like an eternity having to slog through this piece of shit. Do I honestly even need to say skip this one?

#21: The Rezort (2015)

The plot: Years after the cancellation of the zombie apocalypse, the remaining zombies have been rounded up to an island owned by a private company where people can come and pay as tourists to shoot zombies. But when a conscientious objector sabotages the island's systems, the zombies quickly take over and many people die. So a small group of tourist survivors must reach a rendezvous point at the end of the island if they are to escape not only the zombies but also a strafing bombardment meant to eliminate the zombie outbreak.

My thoughts: For a movie that was obviously conceptualized as Jurassic Park (or Jurassic World since this park is actually running) but with zombies instead of dinosaurs, this movie ain't half-bad. The characters are nothing to write home about, although there is a Dirty Harry-type I was routing for the entire movie, and the action and plot are pretty standard for a zombie flick. Still, it's a mildly fun time and I recommend you give it a go.

#22: Scream (1996)

The plot: A mysterious serial killer who is savvy in the ways of the slasher subgenre of horror is gradually killing off various people around high schooler Sidney Prescott. So who could it be?

My thoughts: Talk about a standard slasher flick elevated by the principle of being meta. I enjoyed it, yes, and with the way the film is constructed as a whodunit, it certainly manages to stand out as above average overall. I could see how this was revolutionary back in the 1990s, but now, with pretty much every single genre movie being self-aware in some way or another, I just kind of shrug my shoulders at it as an experience. I think it helps if you're familiar with the slasher subgenre if you're to watch this, but I think it's a good enough film to stand on its own to someone who hasn't seen a slasher flick their whole lives, if only for the story.

#23: Hush (2016)

The plot: A woman with an instinctive writer's mind who is both deaf and mute in a cabin in the woods is thrust into a deadly cat-and-mouse game with a deranged serial killer who wants to toy with her before he kills her.

My thoughts: This is a movie that squeezes every bit of tension and suspense it can in the eighty-something minutes it has, and it makes good use of that tension and suspense in conjunction with its expert pacing. At no point did I think anything was dragged out; everything here was just as long as it needed to be, and it was all resolved in a satisfactory (and quite bloody) way that left me feeling, “Yep, that was a good time.”

#24: The Bye Bye Man (2017)

The plot: There is a demonic entity known as the Bye Bye Man who will psychologically torture you before he kills you if you think or say his name. And he's doing that to three young adults who are all living together in a haunted house. Yeah...

My thoughts: A very forgettable, subpar horror film with an antagonist with an awful name and no memorable appearance. Skip.

#25: Scream 2 (1997)

The plot: One year after the Woodsboro killings, Sidney Prescott is once again haunted by the return of Ghostface as she is attending college this time around. But who could Ghostface be this time? And what meta-commentaries could this movie bring forth about the slasher genre and sequels both?

My thoughts: This is a film that feels like it was planned out from the beginning as a companion piece to the first film; by that, I mean that it feels like writer Kevin Williamson always intended to have this movie be made after Scream had come out. And considering that this movie was released only a year after its predecessor, I think that theory may be true (then again, I haven't done any research for this movie, so for all I know, Williamson and Wes Craven didn't even intend for there to be a sequel in the first place). Regardless, this feels like a natural progression of the first film and while not necessarily surpassing it in terms of quality, I feel like it lives up to the first Scream in a satisfactory way.

#26: Jason Goes to Hell: The Final Friday (1993)

The plot: After years of killing horny teenage counselors at Camp Crystal Lake, Jason Voorhees is finally blown away into literal bits and pieces by the FBI. However, his spirit lives on as his essence is passed on from person to person until he can find a permanent new body through a living blood relative, and all the while, his killing spree resumes.

My thoughts: As a movie that was intended to be the finale to Jason Voorhees, this did have some silly moments in it like Freddy's Dead but not nearly as over-the-top. And it is a little disappointing to not have Jason in his prime form like he was in Friday the 13th Part VI to VIII and, again, it was a little bit more disappointing than Freddy's Dead (which is far more entertaining), especially since this movie retcons so much of Jason's mythology that it feels like no one who worked on this movie has ever seen a Jason movie. So, yeah, I can't recommend this one unless you're a Friday the 13th fan (and even then, I don't think you'll like it).

#27: Terrifier (2016)

The plot: A mute man in a creepy clown costume stalks multiple victims in a condemned apartment complex with ruthless killing methods that make him worthy of the moniker Terrifier.

My thoughts: Holy shit, this movie was fucking creepy... and I fucking loved it. Of course, I can't recommend it to everyone, as this movie was also ridiculously over-the-top with its violence and gore. I don't want to give anything away, but as an example, there is a scene that involves our killer, Art the Clown, with a saw and a woman's who's upside down that's one of the most shocking things I've seen... and, again, I fucking loved it. It was an unnerving film that's worthy of having been watched for this month.

#28: Pride and Prejudice and Zombies (2016)

The plot: Take Jane Austin's feminist classic Pride and Prejudice and then shoe-horn a half-baked zombie plot into it. Okay...

My thoughts: I'm not familiar with Pride and Prejudice, so I went into this completely blind. But with that being said, I still thought that this was one of the most pointless, unfunny and unexciting parodies I've seen. The action scenes aren't all that good and it makes me wonder why this was adapted to the big screen. And as for the parts that are actually in Pride and Prejudice (at least as far as I can guess), I thought they were competently done, but they're just not for me. I guess someone who really Pride and Prejudice might like it, but that's only if they have a taste for zombie violence, too. Otherwise, skip this one; it's just dull.

#29: Zombeavers (2014)

The plot: A container of radioactive waste falls from a truck and floats down a river to infect a number of beavers that are nearby a cabin where a bunch of horny teenagers are. And those beavers become zombie beavers, or zombeavers.

My thoughts: I thought I was going into a movie that was going to be on the same level of bad as ThanksKilling, but thankfully, while the comedy isn't anything to write home about, the acting is at least competent and I was amused by the events that were going on. It was interesting to see what would happen if a zombeaver infected a human, and there were decent amount of subverting of expectations as to who was going to die first and who would live (and not in a Rian Johnson way either). I could see this movie not working for everyone, but it's fun enough as a creature feature with a supernatural element to it.

#30: Event Horizon (1997)

The plot: In 2047, a spaceship dubbed the Event Horizon mysteriously reappears near the edge of Earth's solar system and a salvage team is sent to investigate what happened. But as they arrive, they find that the ship may be more than just a ship now...

My thoughts: As much as I'd love to see what this movie would have looked like had the filmmakers not toned back on the violence and gore, I was still satisfied by what we got here. Sam Neill delivers a deliciously evil performance once Dr. Weir goes to the dark side that it practically borders on Tim Curry territory, and I thought the movie was a good space horror film that was just original enough to be its own thing and not be a knockoff of, say, Alien. Give it a watch; the violence you do see here ain't that bad.

#31: Halloweed (2016)

The plot: A couple of stoners move to a small town so that one of them can get away from the reputation of being the son of a now-dead serial killer. But what these stoners don't know is that they've arrived just in time for a slew of killings to start as Halloween approaches.

My thoughts: I'm mentally kicking myself for having this be the movie I ended the month of October on. This was one of the lamest comedies I've ever seen in my life; I can't remember laughing at all in this bland turd. And it could hardly qualify as a slasher film since the slasher killings don't start until there's about 49 minutes left in the film, and even then, it's barely focused on for the rest of the movie until it's resolved at the end. Skip this and don't let it be anywhere on your viewing block for next Halloween.

And that's it. Those were all 31 of the films I'd seen for the month of Halloween, one for each day. It was quite a venture, but one worth the time if only for bragging rights if not for entertainment (especially since very few of these movies were any real good). So please leave a comment, let me know if you saw any of these movies, if not for this past Halloween, then if you have seen any of these at all, and if so, let me know if you agree or disagree. Until then, here's to better films next Halloween!

*This post has been paid for and sponsored by Silver Shamrock, Inc. When you want quality masks at affordable prices, and a guarantee that they won't unleash killer insects and snakes that will trigger a potential apocalypse, look no further for a Happy Happy Halloween, Silver Shamrock!

#halloween #halloween films #film retrospective

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